#my throat feels like its closing up my chest and stomach is heavy im crying somethn js happening idk what

[ace-with--a-mace]

i think ive been in a constant state of melancholy

[tired-truffle]

Even the Gods Cry For Us

A Viktorxfem!reader fic

Chapter Word Count: 2.3k

Part 4/17

Tag list: @im-just-a-simp-le-whore @potatointhedirt (if anyone else would like to be tagged with future updates let me know!)

"PYLADES: I'll take care of you.

ORESTES: It's rotten work.

PYLADES: Not to me. Not if it's you." - Anne Carson

Warning: Panic attack (kind of?)

Masterlist

A whisper, faint at first, but growing louder with each passing second. It curled around the base of your skull, a sinister caress that sent beads of sweat trickling down your spine. That voice, you knew it all too well - it had haunted the edges of your consciousness ever since that fateful day when you first came into contact with the Hexcore.

"Mila..." it hissed, the breathy syllables of your name elongated and distorted. "You cannot resist me forever. I am a part of you now, just as surely as the teeth in your skull and the organs in your belly."

You shuddered, your fingers tightening around Viktor's as you fought against the invasive presence worming its way into your thoughts. The Hexcore's voice was poison, sweet and almost sentimental as it dripped honeyed promises into your mind.

No, you thought to yourself, tucking your face into Viktor’s chest - the blue jolts of your magic that sustained him tickling your cheek. I won't let you control me. I won't let you turn me into a monster.

The Hexcore's laughter echoed through your ears, a grating, discordant sound that set your teeth on edge. "Oh, my dear, sweet Mila," it purred, the false affection in its tone making your skin crawl. "You already are a monster. The power within you and the runes that mark your flesh are my gift to you, my claim upon your soul. You belong to me now, whether you like it or not."

And just as abruptly as it had appeared, the presence dissipated, leaving only a faint echo of its malicious laughter behind.

You shook your head vigorously, the cold sweat that had formed along your skin settling at the small of your back, your unease sitting in the pit of your stomach like lead.

You didn’t have the energy or ability to tell Viktor at that moment. You would later, of course, you weren’t about to get in the habit of keeping secrets from him. But in that particular instance, the gravity of the situation demanded a level-headed approach. You needed to have your wits about you when you inevitably broke the news that the Hexcore was finally awake and able to speak to you.

Forcing a smile, you leaned up to press a kiss to his lips. "We should get some rest," you whispered, trailing your fingers along the line of his jaw, metal meeting flesh. “I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty tired after all that.”

Viktor studied your face for a moment, searching as if he could sense the unspoken anxiety that churned beneath the surface. But he simply nodded, his arms tightening as he pulled you close.

“Sweet dreams, lásko,” he said as you nestled into his embrace, letting your eyes drift closed. Exhaustion tugged at your limbs, the fear, the magic, the ever-present threat of the Hexcore - it all coalesced into a bone-deep weariness that settled into your marrow.

“Lásko,” you mumbled, feeling clumsy in your pronunciation, “what does it mean?”

“Love. I think it suits you.” His voice rumbled low in his throat, and your heart warmed. Yes, it suited you just fine.

The city of Piltover was known for its mild climate, never experiencing any terrible heat waves. Even the Undercity, often considered a grimy and crowded place, shared in this moderate weather. The air was comfortable, warm enough not to necessitate heavy winter coats, but cool enough that one could comfortably wear shorts without sweating through them.

It seemed, somewhere in the middle of the night, that had all changed.

Your skin was slick with sweat, a thin layer of moisture coating every inch of your body. The heat radiating from within was suffocating, as if you had been trapped in an overheated sauna for hours on end. Your mind felt hazy and disoriented, like a fog had settled over it, making it difficult to think clearly - or at all. Every breath was laboured and each movement felt like an overburdened task. You groaned your discomfort as you vaguely registered movement beside you - or perhaps under you, it was difficult to tell - a hand on your shoulder, shaking you gently, saying something you couldn’t make out. 

Your eyelids struggled to open as if Jayce’s heavy training equipment weighed them down. The world remained blurry and unfocused. The hand moved to your forehead, then slid behind your ears, a noise of dismay accompanying each touch. 

A blessedly cold and damp sensation pressed against your forehead, drawing a shuddering sigh of relief from your parched lips. The cool sensation was a blessing against the feverish heat that radiated through you, chasing away the worst of the discomfort.

Through the haze of exhaustion and sickness, you could just make out Viktor's face hovering above you, pinched with worry as he adjusted the cool compress. His lips moved, forming words you couldn't quite grasp, their meaning slipping through your fingers like wisps of smoke. But the cadence of his voice, low and soothing, washed over you like a gentle tide, lulling you back towards the welcoming pull of sleep.

Darkness and light danced across your vision, a technicoloured display that swirled and bled together like watercolour paint on a well-loved palatte. Faces, familiar yet strange, hovered at the edges of your sight, their features fuzzy and indistinct. Viktor's voice, a distant echo, threaded through the haze, a line tethering you to the waking world even as you drifted in and out of consciousness.

Time lost all meaning, minutes and hours bleeding together until you could no longer distinguish one from the other. The fever burned through you, a raging inferno that consumed everything in its path, leaving only ashes and confusion. Your thoughts scattered like leaves on the wind, fragmented and fleeting, impossible to grasp for more than a moment before they slipped away again.

In the brief moments of clarity, you could feel the cool press of a damp cloth against your forehead, the gentle touch of Viktor's hands as he tended to you with a devotion that made your heart ache. His fingers, flesh and metal, brushed against your cheek, your hair, your lips, each touch a silent promise that he would see you through this trial no matter what it took.

But even his presence could not chase away the visions that haunted your fevered dreams. The Hexcore's whispers, once a distant murmur, now roared in your ears like a monstrous beast, drowning out all other sounds. Its seductive and insidious voice filled your mind with images of power and destruction, of a world remade in your image.

You saw yourself, wreathed in violet light, your eyes glowing with an otherworldly radiance as you stood at the center of a whirlwind of energy. The runes that marked your skin pulsed and writhed, alive with the Hexcore's nefarious power. And at your feet, kneeling in subjugation, were the people of Runeterra, their faces upturned in a mix of awe and terror.

"This is your destiny," the Hexcore purred, its voice a slimy caress against the shell of your ear. "Embrace it, and all the world will be yours to command. You would have the power to keep Viktor alive. Forever."

You wanted to scream, to rage against the lies that poured like cyanide into your mind. But your voice was lost, swallowed up by the fever. Your body, once your own, now felt like a foreign thing, a vessel for the Hexcore. And you had done it all to yourself.

Eerie silence greeted you. Gone was the comforting buzz of Viktor’s presence, the floorboards quiet without his movement. Panic leaped into your throat, adrenaline mixing with the Shimmer in your veins and propelling you upwards - though it did little to stop your head from spinning or your vision from spotting out. Your shoulder collided with a wall, sending a dull thud reverberating through your body. But you persevered, pushing onward.

As far as you could tell with your limited sight, the room was empty. 

“Viktor,” you tried to shout, but it came out as a barely intelligible rasp.

No one answered your call.

With shaking limbs, you pushed yourself away from the wall, struggling to maintain your balance as you stumbled towards the door. Your movements were unsteady, like a puppet controlled by an unskilled hand. The world tilted and spun around you, a dizzying spread of muted colours and shifting shadows that made your stomach churn and your head throb.

Each step took more effort than it should, your body heavy and uncooperative as you forced it to move. The fever hadn’t left, turning your blood to acid and your skin to paper-thin parchment stretched over brittle bones. Sweat beaded on your brow, salty trails trickling down your face and stinging your eyes, but you blinked them away, your gaze fixed on the door with single-minded determination.

Just a few more steps, you told yourself, just a few more and you would be out of this room, out of this suffocating silence and into the world beyond where surely Viktor would be waiting for you. He wouldn't leave you, not like this, not when you needed him most.

But as you reached for the doorknob, your fingers brushing against the handle, you pulled up short. There, carved into the dust and cracking paint of the door, were words that made your heart stutter and your lungs empty.

Back soon, stay calm. -V

The letters were unmistakably Viktor's, the precise, angular strokes of his handwriting as familiar to you as your own. He had left you, slipped out while you were lost in the throes of your fever dreams, off to find…you didn’t know, but it had to be important, or else you were sure he wouldn’t have gone. Medicine, most likely, something to break the fever.

A sob welled up in your throat, equal parts relief and despair. He hadn't abandoned you, not truly. But the thought of him out there, alone and unprotected, while you lay helpless and weak, sent a hot spike of fear through your chest. What if something happened to him? What if he encountered trouble?

Gritting your teeth, you twisted the doorknob, the rough wood biting into your palm as you wrenched it open. The hallway beyond was a yawning chasm, the stairs a treacherous descent.

Your legs gave out beneath you, your body crumpling like a withering flower, its petals wilting and its stem bowing. The hard floor rushed up to meet you, sending a sharp jolt of pain through your already aching limbs as you collapsed against the doorframe. It pressed into your spine, digging into your shoulder blades.

An all-consuming panic clawed at your throat, constricting it with each short gasping breath. Your chest heaved as if trying to push out the fear that threatened to choke you. Viktor was out there, alone and vulnerable, while you were too weak even to stand, let alone go after him.

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes, hot and stinging as they spilled down your cheeks. The salt mingled with the sweat that already coated your skin, leaving bitter tracks through the grim. A guttural sob tore itself from your throat, raw and ragged, a sound of pure despair that echoed in the empty hallway.

What if something happened to him? What if he encountered trouble? Ran into someone who meant him harm?

As despair threatened to overwhelm you, a strange feeling tickled at the edges of your awareness. It started as a gentle brushing against your legs, like the whisper of a soft breeze through tall grass. But as the seconds ticked by, the sensation grew more insistent, more tangible, until you could no longer ignore it. With great effort, you lifted your head, your gaze drifting down to your legs.

Vines, thick and green, slithered up your body, curling around your legs like living ropes. Each tendril seemed to sprout from the floorboards beneath you, pushing through the cracks and crevices as if answering some unspoken call.

With a frantic burst of energy, you attempted to scramble away, your fingers clawing at the ground as you desperately tried to push yourself up and out of their reach. But your body refused to cooperate, your limbs heavy and unresponsive as the vines continued their relentless advance.

They wound their way up your torso, slipping beneath your shirt and curling around your waist like a lover's embrace. The sensation was unusual, not quite painful but not entirely comfortable either. It was as if the vines were searching for something, probing and prodding at your skin as they sought out the hidden pathways of your body.

They climbed higher and higher, winding around your chest, your shoulders, your neck. Tendrils brushed against your face like serpents seeking warmth, tracing the curve of your cheekbones, the arch of your brows, the soft swell of your lips.

Your arms, once free, were now pinned to your sides, the vines wrapping around them in a tight, unyielding grip. Your legs, already weak and unsteady, were now completely immobilized, anchored to the floor by the writhing mass of greenery that had sprouted up around you. Even your head, which had lolled to the side in your exhaustion, was now held fast, the vines cradling your skull in a vice-like grip. You tried to twist away, to wrench your head to the side, but their grip was unyielding, holding you fast as they explored every contour of your features.

Your breath came in quick, sharp gasps as the vines tightened their hold, constricting around your chest like a serpent's coils. Each inhale was a struggle, your lungs burning with the effort as you fought against the crushing pressure. Stars danced at the edges of your vision, bright pinpricks of light that flickered and swam in the gathering darkness.

And still, the vines grew, their tendrils weaving together into a living cocoon that enveloped your entire body. They pressed against your skin, cool and slightly damp, their touch both soothing and terrifying in equal measure. It was as if they were trying to absorb you, to draw you in and never let you go.

And you were powerless to stop them.

Next Chapter

A/N: Did anyone ask for a cliffhanger? No? Please forgive me.

You can join us in the discord chat and berate me for my evils.

[astr0exe]

✬ safe [ Simon Riley X transmasc reader ] ✬

CW / TW : tm!reader, dysphoria, pure fluff, slight angst(?) 629 words, this feels rlly long sorry:(

THIS IS MY FIRST TIME WRITING HURT/COMFORT!1!

here I was, stood in front of my god forsaken mirror, my eyes glazed over with tears as I run your hands down my binded chest, the tears fall and I cant stop them. The binder isn’t doing its job.. its not working.. I still arent flat! Im not.. I look like a girl..

I’m so involved glaring at my reflection I don’t even notice when he walks in, my fiancé who also happens to be my superior, my Ghost.. My Simon, who’s been there for me. Always.

Even though I don’t notice him he instantly notices me, notices my tears, my hateful scowl. He knows what its like to not look how you wish you could, despite his scars showing his story, he will always be embarrassed by them.

I jump, a quiet yelp emitting from my throat. I gaze at him through the mirror not having the heart to turn around and face him, just letting his hands slip around my waist his calloused fingers dancing over my stomach, my head leans back against his shoulder our cheeks grazing softly, my tears ruining down my face as we just stand there, for what feels like hours, as I cry softly.

His words cut through my pounding heart and rapid breathing “hey lovie.. hey handsome.. you’re so strong.. so amazing.. My boy.. My fiancé…” he moves us to our bed as I try to stop my crying, but his words hit me more than I would like to admit, his words being exactly what I’ve needed to hear all day or honestly, longer than that.

As we lay facing each other, my hands clutching his shirt tightly like a terrified child needing comfort, because in this moment thats exactly what I need, comfort and Simon knows this perfectly, he always knows exactly what I need. I mumble a quiet an almost inaudible apology, my words dripping with emotion, feeling pathetic in the situation.

His eyes widen and his mouth opens.. then closes.. then opens again, and I wince, thinking I have done something wrong, I bury my face into his chest slightly ready for him to shout at me for saying sorry, even though I know he would never. He slowly and softly tilts my head up, so our eyes can meet and he can wipe away the residue of tears “Sweetheart.. look at me.. there we go.. good boy.” He sighs before speaking again.

“You.. are strong. You are more than capable.. You are handsome and pretty and amazing and so bloody intelligent.. But you should know… you are allowed to be vulnerable and have these feelings. I will always be here to support you, to keep you grounded and as happy as possible.” His words make me almost tear up again, my eyes glazing over with salty tears as I try to move even closer to Simon, his hand that has remained on my cheek softly thumbs away my tears again.. and again.. and again before they finally stopped falling.

My hands move to play with Simons dirty blonde hair, his ocean blue eyes staring into my own softly, showing his affections without the words. My eyes flutter shut as i murmur a quiet “i love you” towards Simon, the wave of exhaustion that hit me was obvious to Simon, who chuckled softly moving my hair away from my forehead so he can kiss it. His lips are slightly chapped against my skin, I can feel my eyes get heavy as I finally relax, ignoring all the horrible thoughts that plagued my mind before Simon silenced them. I fall asleep in my lovers arms, knowing I’m not only safe but also cared for, I know.. That I’m loved and I’m wanted.. My Simon Riley.. my protector

[summ6rbummer]

PATRICK HOCKSETTER X FEMALE BULLY VICTIM PT. 3

FUCK YOU FREAK

so we're starting to get somewhere with this story yayy!! patrick is a mega stalker now, on the count of breaking-and-entering!! anyways, last time, you, the reader had set out to fuck up patrick! (yay for you)

overall tw for all counts of violence and assault and more violence ofc

ily all

----------

it was a colder night, crickets were chirping and cicadas were buzzing and mosquitoes were nipping at my legs. i could care less. all i could feel was anger and disgust and fear at the acts and past of patrick hocksetter. i still had the bread knife clenched in my clammy palm, and my breathing was heavy as i stomped down the street towards patrick's house. i remembered memorizing his address and the way his house looked and the schedule of his family, all so i would know to avoid it. to take a different street after school, to know to start running if i see his bedroom light come on at night, and to never make eye contact with his mother when she waters her flowers in the morning in the fear of her acknowledging me and him over hearing.

just living in fear of him. and im so sick of it. it ends tonight. i stood at the end of his driveway and his parents car wasn't there. perfect. i stomped up to the front door and a sudden wave of overwhelming fear washed through my body.

why am i scared now. I've spent my whole life being afraid of this fucking asshole. whatever happens i can't be afraid of him. im so tired of this.

i turn the doorknob handle, knowing it was unlocked. i swiftly stepped inside and silently closed it behind me. i practically tiptoed through the front hallway, tightly gripping the knife in my clammy hand. the second door on the left side of the hallway was his bedroom.

i could hear him moving around in his room, maybe unlacing his boots considering he was done stomping around my room like a fucking bozo.

i reached for the doorknob and my fingertips just barely grazed it when the door swung open and i was face to face with Patrick’s chest. my blood froze.

then suddenly i was reminded that he had been making my blood run cold my entire life. and i was tired of it.

my brow furrowed and my lip curled and i cracked, lunging at him with the knife in my hand and pure hatred in my eyes.

i really don’t know what i was thinking. hes much bigger than i am, definitely stronger, and definitely crazier.

not even a second had passed before i was on the floor with the knife flung down the hallway; Patrick standing at my feet. my breath stopped in my throat and i felt nausea pilling in my stomach.

fuck fuck fuck. why did i think i could do this? im gonna fucking die in patrick's fucking house and they're going to use a terrible photo of me in my obituary.

i scrambled away from him, scampering down the hallway and reaching for the knife. a wrecked cry flew from my throat as his muddy boot came down on my hand. he grabbed the back of my shirt and pulled me back down the hallway. away from the door, away from the knife, the street, my life.

i was dragged into his bedroom, the rug folding up under my writhing legs. i kicked at his ankles, and scratched at the floor. after i was fully in his room, he tossed me sideways and stepped to slam his door closed.

why did i decide to be brave. why did i think i was strong enough to do anything? why am i so stupid.

patrick stood in the entrance to the bedroom, just standing there. staring. i had scrambled back against the wall, hugging my knees. i couldn't understand the look in his eyes. he looked angry.. but in a way that was sad.. almost disappointed. it was a long, tense, silent moment before he said anything.

"why would you do that."

it wasn't a question. all of a sudden i was angry again. i lunged up and at him, hands ready to claw at his face.

"because of you! its you and Henry and fucking Victor and Belch! its you! you make my life a living hell! i hate you i fucking hate you and everything you've done to me in my life! i want you dead!'

i clawed at his neck and he grabbed my wrists, holding me away as i screamed in his face.

"im tired of having to live with you terrorizing me!"

i was cut off when he shoved me back, my hip hitting the backboard of the bed. i groaned in pain.

"why do you think i 'terrorize' you?" "hm? ive told you before. its because you're real. like me."

i sighed. "oh shut the fuck up patrick. what does that even mean? you're real. im real. of course i am! this is fucking real life!"

his face faltered. he stepped towards me again with a darker look fallen over his body. "the last time someone else came into my life and was real, he ruined everything. i had to fix that. and now im the only one left. or i was. but then you showed up. i realized you were real too and that i had to fix it early. and i did." a crazed smile started spreading on his face. "everyone else is fake! its just us that are real! and its only going to be us!"

so much shock surged through my body that i laughed. an exasperated, tired laugh of pure confusion wheezed from my lungs. "what the fuck is wrong with you? oh my god you're fucking insane! im talking to an insane person! you're crazy!" i gasped in between laughs. his face fell.

"no." he stepped forward, his eyes darker than ever. 'im not crazy. im real. and.. you are too. i knew you wouldnt understand. you think you can fool me? you just want to replace me." he stepped forward again, his hands stiff and shaking and his face stone.

the wheezing laugh had left me, as well as all the air left in my lungs. the tone in his voice was telling. i never should've called him crazy. you cant call crazy people crazy.

im not going to make it out of this house alive.

suddenly his hands were around my throat, squeezing, tearing ripping at my skin. i screamed, a bloodcurdling scream and tore at his shoulders. my nails dug into his face, and his into my neck in return. i could feel the air struggling to enter my body.

i was gasping and screaming and sobbing, suffocating.

and i could only look at him.

i could only see his eyes. they weren't brown anymore, they were black. like a sharks eyes, dark and unforgiving. inhuman.

as darkness crept into the corners of my vision and my limbs went numb, i could only think of one thing.

what if i wasn't in that class in fifth grade.

[garoujo]

WHERE THEY LIKE TO FINISH — GENSHIN IMPACT

feat : diluc, childe, itto, kazuha + xiao

♱ warnings — f!reader, cumshots, creampies, not proof read, multiple / overstimulation orgasms in itto’s, some drool, some biting, blow jobs.

♱ note — cannot get this out of my head + neow here we are i hope u enjoy :’> im feeling a lil burnt out and i wrote these w a headache so i hope they’re not too bad . . . </3

・✶ ｡ﾟDILUC RAGNVINDR

something carnal twists in diluc’s stomach when he sees the way your pretty face looks covered in his cum. the way the milky liquid clings to your skin and how cute you look when your tongue clears away what you can reach followed by a loud swallow — and he can’t deny the way he feels his heavy cock twitch alive once more at the sight.

diluc is slumped in his quarters at the dawn winery as you kneel between his thighs, pumping spit along his heavy cock while your tongue does mindless, intoxicating swirls around the sensitive head that have his gloved hands digging into the wooden arms of his chair — grunting when you close your lips around the head and suckle. “i—fuck, i wont last long.” he groans, rough and low as his head falls back against the chair, his broad chest expanding with the deep inhale he takes in order to control himself, but you make him lose all of that when he feels you sink yourself down onto him once more.

he feels your throat squeeze around him, feeling you swallow and slurp, and the way your tongue is tracing along the veins and sensitive nerves of his cock has his whole body tingling before he’s groaning once more, his voice coming out a lot needier than he’d expected as his large hand cups the back of your neck before he squeezes with another lewd slurp from you. “g-god—i’m gonna cum.” diluc rasps, shifting restlessly in his chair and the way you pull back from him is wet as your spit catches, clinging to the ivory skin of his cock.

you twist your wrist as you send him a doe-eyed, glassy look when his heavy, vermillion gaze meets yours — pumping his cock for all its worth with rough strokes of your palm until he’s cumming with a bright blush and a trembling groan, eyes trained on you when the first rope of his cum streaks along your cheeks. you drag your tight fist slow across diluc’s cock to help him through it, hearing soft praises pour from his lips as each deep throb of his orgasm lands messy along your pouty lips and skin, before he’s tucking his fingers under your jaw and tilting your face up to admire you. “beautiful.”

・✶ ｡ﾟTARTAGLIA / CHILDE

childe loves how pretty your pussy looks when it’s soaked in his cum, every deep throb of his orgasm making a mess between your thighs as he watches the way your pussy clenches in the remnants of your tingling pleasure — the orgasms he’d pulled from you before he’d let himself have his own and seeing you like this almost feels like his trophy.

“look how pretty you look, you’re doing so well for me.” childe hums, a teasing lull to his voice despite the way he feels like he’s losing himself in you, in the needy coax of your pussy and the push and pull of your body—everything about you made him feel weak but you were all his. the way you’re clinging to him, crying out “a—ajax! more.” makes him feel dizzy and you look so pretty when you’re moaning for him, your body jolting underneath him as each of his quick thrusts render your breathless.

you squeal when you feel childe’s fingers trace towards your bodies, rubbing sticky circles into your puffy clit and your pussy throbs when he pairs it with the back and forth stutter of his hips, until your breathing is skipping and he presses his hips deep into yours. the first too much touch of his cock thrusts you into a mind-numbing orgasm as you twist beneath him, the first milking compression of your walls making him whimper before he’s growling at the thick ring of cream gathering around the base of his cock everytime he draws his hips back.

“t-that’s it, shit—you’re too sweet. my turn, pretty girl—uhhh, fuck!” childe groans, scratchy and breathless as he loses himself in the fluttering pull of your pussy, pulling out almost a second too late before his pretty fingers are wrapping around the base of his cock and he finally lets the hot rush of his own bliss consume and swallow him whole. it only takes a few languid strokes of his palm before he’s throbbing, shooting robes of his creamy load along your glistening folds as his jaw clenches, hissing through his teeth between grunted curses while he watches his cum pool along your messy cunt. “oh, i could look at you like this all day, sweetheart.”

・✶ ｡ﾟARATAKI ITTO

it’s almost complete carnal instinct the desire itto feels to see your pussy completely full of his cum, sending you a starry-eyed glance when he watches it pour out of your spent walls and the way his still hard cock twitches between your thighs even after his nth orgasm makes you feel dizzy. but you know he’s not done when you hear him growl, hooking your thighs around his thick waist.

every wet withdrawal of itto’s hips is so fucking loud and each deep thrust of his cock feels like it reaches even deeper with every heavy clap of his hips against yours, a moan of his name kicking against your chest and you feel like you’re losing your mind at the thick spread of his cock. but you know he’s nowhere near done when he sends you a bright grin, groaning when another sharp thrust pushes out more of his cum from your sensitive, puffy walls as he splits you open for the nth time that night. “oh yeah, there’s d-definitely some room in there for one more, fuck—don’t ya think, babe?”

you don’t even have it in your mind to reply with the way youre crumbling under each of itto’s thrusts, he’s fucking you completely boneless and dumb and you’re pretty sure the blunt head of his cock should be purple by now with how many times he’s cum. but the way he grabs at you is still needy as he moans your name, pressing against the swollen spots inside of you with every wet connection of his hips that’s driven by the brute strength in his heavy body. “pussy was fuckin’ m-made for me, yeah it was—and fuck, does it feel s-so good.”

your walls throb with every unforgiving push of his hips and your orgasm washes over you quickly with how sensitive you still are, the sudden squeeze around itto’s cock making his pace stutter before he’s gritting his teeth and pushing another thick, heavy load inside of you with another long, agonised grunt. the lewd squelching noises when he sinks into you drives him fucking wild as he ruts into you like some wild animal, drooling shamelessly along your cheeks when he curls over you to pin you completely — primitive instincts taking over as he continues to fuck into your messy pussy until theres cum smeared along his pelvis. “o-one more, babe—come on, one more.”

・✶ ｡ﾟKAEDEHARA KAZUHA

kazuha was obsessed with the way your tits felt beneath his palms, taking low, languid handfuls of your breasts as he fucked into you but what he loved more was how they looked when they were covered in his cum — the sticky liquid pooling along your skin as you send him a starry-eyed glance and fuck you’ve never looked prettier.

kazuha’s jaw clenches before a breathier croon of your name falls from his lips, his thumb tracing mindlessly along the sensitive buds of your tits as he sinks his cock into your pussy. but the pace of his hips only gets needier with the way youre clenching around him tighter everytime he rocks forward, leaving red marks along the ivory skin of his shoulders with your nails. the way he’s palming and groping at your tits makes you feel dizzy when it’s followed by his cock grazing along your swollen spots, your vision feeling cloudy as your thrusted head first closer into your own overwhelming ecstasy.

“g-gonna cum, kazu!” you squeal and you hear kazuha chuckle breathlessly with a “go ahead, baby.” when he deliberately grinds his pelvis against your clit, until he feels the first intoxicating throb of your pussy around him. you feel warmth burst along your thighs and stomach when the tight coil finally bursts, and you feel him press his hips into yours before he’s squeezing your tits beneath his palms once more, groaning as he fucks you through your orgasm before he’s pulling back from you suddenly.

“come here, p-please.” kazuha rasps as his slender fingers grab around the base of his cock, twisting his wrist with a few quick strokes as you shuffle towards him and press your tits together just how you know he likes. that’s all it takes for him to come undone, the warmth of his cum streaking along your skin with the first throb of his cock against his palm as he whimpers, sucking his lower lip between his teeth before his biceps are quaking on the next pull, more of his thick load landing along your sensitive nipples. he’s fucked out when he finally lets his cock fall soft between his legs, but not before he’s taking another handful of your breast to smear his cum along the skin. “they look beautiful like this.”

・✶ ｡ﾟXIAO

he couldn’t help that he was so sensitive and the way your tongue feels around him made him weak, the way he’d fall boneless beneath you as you slurped and suckled kisses along the base had his mind reeling, the sudden urge to cum down your throat almost seeming foreign to him but he liked how you always let him indulge.

“g-god, dont s-stop.” xiao breathes, an unsteady waver to his voice as he tries to suppress just how needy he is when he feels your tongue swirl around the sensitive folds of his cock. the way you trail it along the slit, pressing suckling kisses along the sides and swirl it around the sensitive folds making his hips twitch before he’s twisting his hands into the dual-coloured tones of his hair. you’re intoxicating and the way you bring him to his knees is dangerous, but he can’t help but crave that feeling whenever he’s away from you.

seeing the conqueror of demons like this was truly addictive if you were honest, to watch the way he flushes to his chest and the way his lips part to pant softly when you push his cock down the tight tunnel of your throat once more, watching his heavy eyes blink down at you when he feels your tongue trace messy circles along the sides. “i’m going t-to—k-keep going.” xiao grunts before another low whimper of your name is falling from his lips and the sound makes you hum around him, making his hips twitch forward at the sudden stimulation and he hisses, grunting sharply when his orgasm catches you both off guard.

“l-like that, take it.” xiao whines deeply, his voice cracking as his cock throbs against your tongue and he’s cumming down the tight give of your throat. you pull back a little at the sudden rush, allowing yourself a proper taste as you slurp and swallow around his throbbing tip, tongue swirling along the pulsing veins before you feel his palm cup the back of your neck, trembling with each deep throb he feels in his gut as he keeps you in place. his hips twitch in time with each swipe of your tongue and you watch his abdomen tighten before you’re pulling away with a wet, popping sound and blinking up at him as he tries to cover his deep flush behind his arm. “quit staring.”

© 2022 garoujo. please do not copy any of my layouts or writing and translate or repost onto any other sites.

[im-in-vin-ci-ble]

Hello~ Can I request a Mark x fem reader who’s a lot like starfire and is very Powerful close to omni man and is also an alien princess but she lives on earth and they go to the same school and she’s also a solo hero who one day sees invincible fighting off a tough villain with the teenteam but is losing so she steps in to help and he recognizes her and starts getting all nervous since he has a crush on her and then after that they introduce themselves get to know each other and eventually work they’re way up to mark confessing and she says yes :3

(If possible can it be a slow burn im a sucker for slow burn tropes and stuff 😤)

A/N: I gotchu, this bout to be a lil long 😮‍💨 making the fem!reader a little more human, figured since she’s in an actual school for humans she’d need to adapt to the humor/culture so she doesn’t get suspicious

Pairing: Mark Grayson x Fem!Reader

Rating: M, some swearing and gross monster guts

Warnings: N/A

Summary: Mark is finally joined in battle by an alien princess who has caught his attention. Turns out she goes to the same high school, and if he can throw around 150-pound monsters across the street, surely he can confess his true feelings to a girl... right?

"Are you fucking kidding me right now?!" Rex Splode yelled as he wobbled up off the ground. "We've been on this thing for hours and it only has one damn cut!"

"Calm down Rex," Atom Eve said from behind, "You're gonna get even more tired from yelling."

The two watched as Dupli-Kate attempted to distract the scaly kaiju, replicating herself second after second to give space for Invincible to hit the monster by surprise. The kaiju's screech echoed throughout the city and shook the foundations of the surrounding buildings, forcing Rex, Atom Eve and Robot to move aside and save however many civilians they could.

"Invincible," Dupli-Kate shouted, "I can't keep up much longer!"

A sonic boom overcame the surrounding noise and Invincible appeared from the clouds. Dropping in at maximum speed, the young superhero balled his hand into a fist and took a deep breath. A loud battle cry escaped his mouth but it was cut short as the kaiju's heavy arm slapped him away just in time, throwing him through destroyed buildings until he landed on the pavement.

Out of breath, dizzy, and in a serious amount of pain, Invincible laid on the broken road for a second to regain his strength. The wind softly blew down on him as he focused his sight on a contrail leading towards him, and he watched as a girl in purple land right next to him.

She bent down and held him upright, "Invincible, are you okay?"

"Mmhmm," Invincible croaked with a defeated smile, "Totally fine."

His sight reverted back to normal and the first face he saw shocked him alive. It was her. They never talked in school and he was almost sure she didn't know his real name, but here she was, basically cradling him in her arms and calling him Invincible.

So she knows who I am. At least with the suit.

"Come on, that kaiju is about to be destroy the entire city," she said, helping him get back on his feet and flying away to the seemingly unbeatable figure.

He huffed, "Stay cool, Mark. She's here to help," and he followed suit.

This marked the first time he really interacted with the new superhero; he'd only ever see her on TV or read about how she saved people on the newspaper. He'd be lying if he said he didn't find her attractive — as do most guys his age — but watching her blast the kaiju with the green bursts of energy from her hands made her only even more appealing.

Invincible regrouped with the rest of the Teen Team. "I don't know what else we can do to this thing," Atom Eve admitted.

"I do," the girl spoke up. "Distract it as best as you can but stay far away from the stomach. When I tell you to take cover, make a run for it."

Robot replied, "That seems highly dangerous."

"Let's do it," Invincible quickly replied in a high-pitched voice.

Everyone looked over at him, surprised at the sudden change in his voice and just how fast he reacted in agreement. 

"Uh, it's a good plan," he nodded, causing the girl to shoot a warm smile his way. "I definitely think we should do it... if all of you... uh, think, we should."

Exhausted and out of options, the rest of the group followed her orders and took different corners of the monster. Dupli-Kate handled one leg, Rex Splode handled the other, Robot and Atom Eve took the arms, and Invincible went back to the head. The kaiju struggled to keep its focus on just one of the heroes, and while it remained preoccupied, the girl absorbed all the energy she could muster and flew straight for the stomach.

"Take cover, now!"

Invincible and the Teen Team moved away and they watched as the flying hero's eyes opened in a bright shade of neon green, both her arms extended out as a large ball of green formed around her hands. The rays exploded right through the kaiju and it shrieked in pain as she briefly disappeared into the stomach. The kaiju lost balance and slowly fell forward as the girl, her eyes still green, appeared on the other side and harshly fell down on the ground.

The kaiju landed on the street with a loud boom and the group ran towards the girl who was now covered in parts of the kaiju's digestive system.

"Okay, that's kinda gross," Rex Splode commented, to which Dupli-Kate quickly responded, "Shut up."

Invincible dropped down on his knees and wiped the blood and guts off her face. Subtly admiring her facial features up close, he couldn't believe (and almost felt stupid) that he never recognized her despite the fact that he almost saw her everyday.

The girl groaned in agony softly shook her head, her eyes fluttering open to the sight of Invincible's dark hair, goggles and yellow mask.

"Hey, hey," he whispered, "Are you alright?"

She sat up and hissed at her injuries, holding her head with her bloody hand. "Mmhmm," she gently nodded with a half smile, her eye one still shut. "Totally fine."

---

Mark had a hard time focusing on school. His body ached from yesterday's injuries and he suffered a few bruises from literally tearing through buildings. He made his way to his locker and rested his head on the metal door, dreading the fact that he still has an entire afternoon of classes to go. Closing his eyes in hopes to quickly recharge, his moment of peace was disrupted when a shoulder rammed into his chest and several books landed right on his toe.

"Oh god, I'm so sorry," a voice exclaimed.

Mark's head snapped up at the sound of the voice. It's her. He momentarily froze and watched the girl bend down to pick up her things, and when he finally regained movement a split second later, he also bent down to help her out. He kept quiet as he tried to think of the coolest possible response to make her think that he was actually the coolest guy in school, but all he could think of was how heavenly and badass she looked yesterday.

"Thanks," she said as he handed her the book. "I hope your foot doesn't bruise."

They both stood up and he shot her a nervous smile. "T-totally fine," he replied, clearing his throat afterwards.

She crossed her brows at his response and nodded, and a look of suspicion replaced her worried demeanor.

"I'm Mark, by the way," he cleared his throat again and reached out his hand, "Grayson."

"Mark... Grayson, huh?" she responded, scanning his face as her suspicion grew. Her eyes finally landed on the hand that was waiting, and she took one last look into his eyes before deciding to shake it. "I'm Y/N," she introduced herself with a skeptical smile, feeling his sweaty palm wrapped around hers. "I'll see you around, Mark Grayson."

She walked away and Mark's eyes followed her trail as far as he could see. He quickly pulled out his phone to send a text to Eve, who was actually watching their interaction a few classrooms down.

"Mark," Eve called out as she moved towards him. “So I’m assuming...”

"You knew?” he asked her in disbelief. “Why didn't you tell me Y/N was a superhero? I just introduced myself to her as Mark Grayson and I'm almost positive she knows I'm Invincible."

"First off, it's not my secret tell," she answered with a shrug. "Second, you guys didn’t trade secrets or whatever?”

Mark shook his head in a panic, "No, but I'm guessing she also knows that I know her secret the same way I know she knows my secret." He rested his forehead on the locker door once again and groaned, "Ugh, I'm so into her, it isn't even funny. And this whole superhero thing just made it even more awkward."

Eve laughed, "Look, I'm not going to force her to tell you if she isn't up for it, but if you want, I can ask her to hang out with us later. Maybe — emphasis on maybe — my presence will make her comfortable enough to admit who she is."

"Okay, okay," he sighed, turning around to rest the back of his head. "My insides are dying."

"After the kaiju yesterday, be thankful you don't mean that in a literal sense."

---

Where in the hell is Eve?

Mark pulled out his phone for the third time in 10 minutes. Still no call or response from Eve to his text. He was getting evidently nervous; his palms were sweaty again and it felt like someone turned up the heat in Burger Mart. His left leg jerked up and down in anxiety as he stared at his phone, looking at the seconds on the clock icon tick by. If he were left alone with Y/N, he'd have no idea what to say. What does she like? Should I bring up the kaiju yesterday and praise Invincible? No, she'll just think I'm full of myself.

"Hey Mark."

He jolted and saw Y/N standing by the corner of the booth. "Hi!" he replied in that irritatingly high-pitched voice. Mark's heart began to race and the thoughts in his head ran wild. "Um... Have a seat. Sorry Eve isn't here yet, she actually hasn't answered my calls or my messages. Teenage girls, huh? What can you do?"

She crossed her brows again and chuckled, "That's fine, we can wait for Eve. But I think I'm more concerned about you."

"What do you mean?"

Y/N chuckled again, "You seem... nervous.”

He faked an obnoxiously loud laugh, “Me? Nervous?”

She watched him from across the table in silence, waiting for him to regain his composure.

When Mark couldn’t hear Y/N laughing with him, he finally shut up and shook his head. “Yeah, I am nervous, sorry,” he admitted, shutting his eyes tight. 

She giggled, “Totally fine.”

Hearing her say those two words calmed his racing heartbeat. A smile crept on his face and she reciprocated, their eyes locking for a few seconds before both their phones buzzed.

“Oh, I just got a text from Eve,” Mark said. 

“Me too.” She opened the message and began to read it out loud, “Sorry, can’t make it tonight. Something came up.”

“Have fun, you two,” he followed, his voice faltering. He placed his phone, screen down this time, back on the table and sighed, “Sorry, guess you’re stuck with me. That is, if you do want to stay and... hang out, and stuff.”

"Why wouldn’t I?” she replied, her warm smile easing Mark back into a relaxed state. “It’s nice to have a friend who...” she trailed off, “understands.”

“Understands what?” he asked.

“This thing people like us call life,” she answered. “You know, it took me a long time to acclimate here. I didn’t think I ever would, then I met friends who made this place feel like home. And home is a feeling I hadn’t felt in a really long time.”

Mark rested his elbows on the table and leaned in closer, “Well, I’m always here. You know, a-as a friend... or an acquaintance, even. I don’t, I don’t want to push it.”

Y/N giggled again, “You’re a funny man, Mark Grayson. This planet is lucky to have someone like you.” She reached out and held his hand, “And I’m even luckier to have you as a friend, or an acquaintance.” 

He felt the heat rush to his face and he could swear his heart nearly jumped out of his chest. The afternoon flew by in a hurry as they engaged in lengthy conversations, fatty fast food, and childhood stories. While Mark was open to sharing every tiny detail — down to the color of the bleachers at the park where he played little league — Y/N kept hers pretty vague, leaving out descriptions of family members and even the places where these stories happened. 

Mark’s phone buzzed again, but the vibrating pattern indicated it was a phone call. He turned the screen over and saw the unknown number; it was time to suit up.

“Shit, I’m sorry Y/N, but I need to go,” he said in a rush. “I have a... uh, an emergency.”

You couldn’t have thought of anything more specific?

“It’s cool. Um, don’t worry about it,” she said, shaking her head with her eyes glued to the vibrating phone. 

Mark’s one leg was already out the booth before he decided to finally just go for it. Sitting back down with his now quiet phone in his hands, he took a deep breath.

“Y/N, I think you’re really cool. Can I maybe, like, call you sometime, or something?”

Her lips formed into smile that extended to her eyes, and it was enough for Mark to melt a little. “Of course. Yeah, sure,” she replied in excitement and typed down her number on his phone. She handed it back, “Now you know how to reach me if you’re getting your ass whooped again.”

His mouth fell open as his shaky hands grabbed his phone. “Wait—”

She smoothly slid out of the booth, “See you later, Invincible,” she winked, “Don’t get killed today.”

---

Luckily for Mark, no one got killed today. Maybe a few wounds here and there, but nothing painful enough that will land him in the GDA hospital. After spending an hour in the shower, he finally managed to lie down on his bed and rest his body. He sank into the mattress and closed his eyes, taking in the seconds of undisturbed peace that have become rare moments since he got his powers. 

As he replayed the events of today’s fights in his head, his mind drifted off to the hours he spent with Y/N. He pulled out his phone and mustered the courage to press the dial button, and the repeating sound of the ringing was making his pulse race. 

“Hello?”

“Oh good, you didn’t die today.”

Mark chuckled and sandwiched his hand between his head and the pillow. “It wasn’t that bad today, just took a few hits,” he explained. “So listen, Y/N, I was wondering, uh—”

She cut him off, “What are you doing right now?”

“What?”

“What are you doing right now?” she repeated.

“Um, nothing, just getting some rest” he sat up and looked around. “Why?”

“If you’re not too tired, do you maybe...”

Mark smiled, “Maybe...?”

“I don’t know, sneak out? My roof is pretty comfortable.”

Silently fist pumping, he fully stood up and nodded, “Text me the address.”

Just as quietly as he exited his room via the window, he softly landed on Y/N’s roof. Swiftly flying up and greeting him, she took the place next to him and crossed her legs. 

“You’re right, your roof is pretty comfortable,” Mark said.

She chuckled at his remark then noticed a gash by his right temple. Her brows furrowed in worry, “You have a wound,” she said, making sure not to touch it.

“Don’t worry about it,” he replied, softly holding her hand and placing it back down with his. “Totally fine.”

Those words brought her some sense of comfort as her eyes softened, causing her to unconsciously squeeze his hand. Mark’s eyes widened and he looked down at their tangled fingers, frozen for a moment.

“Is this... okay with you?” he asked.

She nodded. “Wanna lie down? Since my roof is so comfortable?” she asked with a smirk.

“Sure,” Mark chuckled, removing his hand from her’s and stretching his arm out as they lied down. Y/N rested her head on his shoulder, keeping her eyes up at the stars.

“Hey Mark?”

“Yeah?”

A moment of silence.

“Thank you for coming.”

He looked down at her as she met his eyes, “You’re welcome.” 

The two shared a smile, and Mark took a deep breath as he prepared himself for the words that were about to come out of his mouth.

It’s now or never, Mark. Now or never.

“Watching you kick ass yesterday was... really a sight to see,” he began. “You’re powerful and strong, but more importantly, brave. And you’re so fucking beautiful and kind and smart and...” Mark trailed off, sighing, “I never thought I would be in this position — with you next to me in a very comfortable rooftop under the stars.”

“Mark...”

“And I really like you. Like, really, really like you.”

“Mark.”

“It’s okay if you don’t feel the same way, but I just wanted to let you know. It’s important that you know—”

“Mark,” she cut him off. “I like you too. A lot.”

He breathed a sigh of relief and covered his eyes with his free hand. “Oh thank god. Thank god!” he exclaimed.

Y/N shushed him, “You’re gonna wake up the neighborhood, Invincible.”

“Sorry,” he giggled quietly, “I got excited.”

She laughed and faced her body towards him. They locked eyes again, and Mark didn’t know if it was gravity or just the adrenaline that pushed him, but he finally leaned down and met her lips. Static ran through his body as he deepened the kiss, and he felt an excitement that was even more exhilarating than the first time he flew.

She pulled away and Mark ran his hand through her hair, resting his hand on her cheek. “How was that?” he asked.

She smiled gently and placed her hand over his, “Totally fine.”

[citrinesparkles]

welcome home.

jason todd x gender neutral reader. 2,086 words. notes: requested by an incredibly flattering anon as part of my hundred followers celebration! thank you again for the feedback, and for enabling me :) also was subconsciously influenced by this piece. warnings: arguing, discussion of danger, reader gets accidentally threatened, patching up wounds, lots more swearing than my usual (but it's all mild language). angst and comfort, i think. super dialogue heavy. this is so long and a little (lot) messy just. prepare yourself

"man," a robotic voice echoed dangerously through the dark living room, sending chills through you. "did you pick the wrong apartment."

luckily, the voice was familiar. "um, the one i live in?"

he choked out your name, startled, and you flicked on the light switch to find him frozen in place with a gun in his hand.

"right." you said tensely, glancing at it- which made him jerk his hand down, shoving the gun into its holster as though it burned him- and looking back up at the eyes of his helmet. "so, uh, i'll turn a light on next time."

"you shouldn't be home yet," he said stiffly.

"i texted you like, three hours ago to let you know i'd be home a day early."

he swore quietly. "my phone's in the river."

"how did it- you know what, at least that explains the radio silence. you didn't think to have someone else- anyone else- let me know?"

"uh." he paused, tensing almost imperceptibly for a moment. "no. i was, uh, i was busy. i'm sorry."

"busy, huh?" something felt very wrong, and not just the fact that he had nearly shot you. "okay, i'll bite, busy with what?"

"nothing important."

the sinking feeling in your stomach intensified and your eyes narrowed dangerously. "important enough that you forgot to tell me you weren't dead in an alley somewhere, when you knew i'd be texting to check in anyway. leaving me worrying in a hotel room in another city."

"nothing out of the ordinary, nothing to worry about." you were really getting sick of the sound of his modulator, but he continued before you could say anything. "go back to what you were doing, babe."

"yeah... uh, no." you stepped forwards and he flinched back defensively, making you freeze. "seriously, what is up with you tonight?"

"noth-"

"jason, i promise if you say nothing one more time, i'm going to lose my mind."

he shifted his foot back slightly, and you took a deep breath.

"okay," you conceded, raising your hands up in surrender and moving backwards yourself. "respecting your space now. that wasn't my best decis-"

your voice cut out when something under his jacket caught your eye.

something red.

"holy crap, jason, what the hell?"

he winced quietly. "you weren't supposed to be home yet, okay?"

"take that stupid helmet off already, would you?" you snapped, already moving to get the first aid kit.

"i would've gone somewhere else if i'd known, okay?" his voice, now clear and crisp without the filter, followed you down the hall.

"that does not make this better!"

"can you please not yell at me right now?"

you dashed back into the room, shooting a vicious glare at him. "jacket."

he slid it off gingerly, dropping it on the couch next to his helmet.

"can you get the armor, or do i need to help?"

even despite the domino mask he was wearing, you could tell he was rolling his eyes. "if i couldn't do it on my own, why would i have come here if i didn't think you'd be home?"

"hm," you took the piece he handed you and carefully set it on the couch, "maybe because you're a stubborn jackass?"

he grunted, sliding his undershirt off and passing it to you. "i don't wanna stain the couch with that."

"your priorities suck."

"it's the nicest piece of furniture we own!"

"it's still a couch!"

"it was expensive!"

"oh for crying out loud-" you threw your hands up again, this time in frustration. "fine! fine. i'll go put this in the tub and get a soak going. you-" you shoved the kit towards him pointedly- "start washing that off."

"how come you're calling the shots?" he snapped back petulantly.

"because my torso's in one piece."

"i have way more experience with this, i should be making the decisions here."

"oh, of course, my apologies!" your voice was absolutely dripping in sarcasm. "what, pray tell, would you have us do?"

he scowled at you for a moment before reaching for the first aid kit and flicking the lid open. "whatever."

you turned on your heel, stomping into the bathroom.

the shirt got thrown into the tub and the tap got tossed all the way on, and as the water crashed into the gray fabric, you took the opportunity to squeeze your eyes shut and breathe deeply.

you opened your eyes a minute later, finding the water dyed a rusty almost-red from blood.

his blood.

you turned off the tap- gently pushed the handle, this time, the fire in your chest now largely extinguished- and made your way back to the living room to find him running a rag over the space below his ribs.

"may i?" you asked softly, stopping a few feet away and holding a hand out to him.

his jaw clenched and relaxed three times in quick succession, but he finally sighed and dropped his shoulders before holding the rag out. "yeah, c'mere."

you worked in silence, being as gentle as possible. jerking your hand back and mumbling apologies when he hissed.

"s'okay, comes with the territory."

you pressed the alcohol-soaked towel back against him, and he sighed.

"that was stupid, huh."

a small laugh escaped you. "it so was."

"can we..."

"try that again?"

"yeah."

you pulled back, standing up straight to meet his eyes. "only if i can take the dumb mask off of you."

"i thought you liked the mask," he teased, a small smirk tugging at his lips.

"jason."

he chuckled, wincing again when it jostled his wounds. "ouch. uh, yeah, mask. g'head."

you gently pulled it from his face, setting it neatly on his other gear before running your thumbs across the line of adhesive it left on his cheekbones. "hi there."

"hey." he leaned into your touch, vibrant eyes fluttering halfway shut. "so uh, welcome home."

"thanks. could've done without the gun, though."

a choking sound tore from his throat, his eyes flying back open. "holy shit, baby, i almost-" he jerked back from you, no regard for his side. "you almost- shit, shit, are you- i'm so sorry, i didn't-"

"okay, woah, hey-"

"i could have killed you."

it was a whisper, horrified and harsh, and while it was technically true, his tone teetered on the edge of a dark space you had seen before and really didn't want him falling back into.

"yeah."

you desperately searched for the right thing to say, rejecting variations of "but hey, you didn't actually", "maybe you should be more careful about waving a gun at people", and one particularly unhelpful "no shit, sherlock".

finally, you settled on a quiet, calm "but i'm still right here, okay?"

his hand flew up to cover his mouth, doing absolutely nothing to hide the near panic written on his features. "i could have killed you."

"okay, so, in the future, we'll... we'll uh, we'll come up with some kind of system for letting you know when i'm home, or something."

"oh, like a phone?" he asked harshly. "the one i was stupid and sloppy enough to dunk in the harbor?"

"that wasn't- i'm guessing that you had a lot on your plate." you waved the cold, bloody towel in your hand at his wounds. it made him curl in on himself slightly, stepping backwards again until his back hit the arm of the couch.

"no excuses. i could have killed you."

"i-"

"no, i almost shot without saying anything!" he exclaimed, brow furrowed and eyes stormy. "i thought someone had broken in, and i got so- i don't even know, damn territorial or some stupid shit- that i almost put a bullet between your eyes. i could have-"

"jason!"

he screwed his eyes shut and dropped his head, roughly tugging his fingers through his hair. "i almost-"

"but you didn't. okay?" every fiber of your being wanted to hold him, to tug him into you and put his hand against your ribs and show him you were okay and breathing, heart still pumping, but he looked enough like a cornered animal that you half expected him to bite you if you tried. "c'mon, jaybird. a life like yours, can you really afford almosts?"

"life like mine, i can't afford to let anyone close to me. apparently, if the goons and thugs don't kill you, i will."

"that's not-"

"what if i hadn't said something?" he snapped venomously. "what if i'd lost more blood and was loopy from it? what if i'd come home with a concussion- again- and didn't think past 'point and shoot'?"

"jason," you finally interjected. "you think i haven't thought about that?"

his eyes, grim and vicious and so full of emotion that you thought you could drown in them, dropped to the floor.

"because it's not a secret that your life is risky. you're risky. i know that. but you're worth every ounce of danger, okay? i'm choosing this, choosing you, knowing full well what i'm getting into, because you're worth all of it."

"i'm not worth any of it."

"that's not your call to make."

"it-"

"you think i need you to make my choices for me?"

"no, of course not."

"you think im stuck here?"

"do you feel like you are?"

"absolutely not." you inched forward again. "i'm here because i want to be."

"...i just... i don't..."

"don't want me to get hurt?"

he finally looked back up at you, eyes watery and jaw tense. "or worse."

"i know, baby. i know," you sighed. "but that's part of life, right? and if the hurt's inevitable, i want the rest of my time to be as nice as possible, and you make my life better. make me better."

"by putting you in danger?"

"it's gotham, handsome, i'm gonna be in danger either way. at least with you, i know i have someone looking out for me. right?"

"always," he said immediately.

"okay then." you took the last step between the two of you slowly, watching for any resistance. meeting none, you brushed your knuckles against his. "i can't think of anywhere i'd feel safer."

"you know that's crazy, right?"

you hummed quietly. "nah."

"i'm being serious."

"me too."

he studied your face silently. you smiled softly at him.

finally, a sigh escaped him and he scooted his hand forward, wrapping his index finger around your own and squeezing gently. "you're sure you want this? i can set you up with a place downtown for a bit. you'd never have to see me again, never have to worry about... all of this."

"i've never been more sure of anything." you said it firmly, confidently, letting the words hang in the air for a few moments before popping one eyebrow up playfully. "why, need to make room for a side piece?"

a startled choking sound escaped him. "excuse me?"

"i mean, when you were talking about being busy, it felt kinda suspicious."

"what is wrong with you?" he asked, exasperation and laughter coating his voice.

"listen, you were being evasive!" his head fell forwards, resting on your shoulder as he laughed.

"i didn't want you to know i was bleeding all over the place!"

"why, didn't want me to worry?"

"exactly!"

you reached your free hand up, gently resting it on the back of his head and playing with his hair. "then maybe, just maybe, you should have gotten someone to tell me your phone went for a swim."

"fair enough."

you stood quietly for a long time, running your fingers through his hair and enjoying the feeling of his breath against your collar.

"i..." he muttered, pulling back to look in your eyes. "i don't think- um. i don't think i'm..." he groaned, gaze darting to the ceiling. "i love you. but the minute you have enough of- of all of this-"

"i won't."

"but if you do, i'll... i'll understand, okay?"

you squeezed his finger gently. "okay." you inhaled deeply, dropping the bloody towel you were still clutching and slid your hand forward to hold his completely. "can we get a bandage on that and go to bed, now?"

"....yes please."

---

"wait!" you yelled, throwing the first aid kit haphazardly onto the bathroom counter and racing after him into the bedroom, where he whirled around with wide eyes. "i love you too! i never said it back- i love you too."

"don't yell like that- i thought something was wrong!"

"me not saying it back is urgently wrong, jason!"

[ererokii]

I came running when I saw your requests were open! Okay, this is pure angst so bare with me. How about the reader dying in all the chaos when Eren first attacked marley? She was Jean's best friend and so when they were in the airship he carried her corpse inside, and Eren sees her and Jean is like she died l, and its all your fault. You could make her die in battle or she could take the bullet for Sasha, its up to you! Im just curious of how Eren would behave... Thank you so much baby🥺 remember to take care and if you dont wanna write this there's no problem!!♡♡♡

WC: 1.1k

Warnings: character death, blood mentions, some violence, some spoilers for season four, unedited. Italics is flash back

“She’s dead. You killed her.”

It’s silent; enough to hear a pin drop. Jaws are dropped, mouths parted as they stare in shock.

Jean stands there, a body limp in his arms, a tear trickling down his face and onto the floor. “She’s dead, Eren.”

Even sits there, staring at him through brown tresses that cover the majority of his face. His brother, Zeke beside him, stares at Jean with a raised eyebrow, absolutely no empathy for him.

“You..you killed her.”

It seems that victory couldn’t even protect everyone in that ship. After you and Jean had aboarded and left someone out there to watch, you were immediately engulfed into a hug by him.

“I’m glad you’re alive,” he mutters, burying his head in the crook of your neck, arms practically squeezing the life out of you. In normal circumstances you would have laughed, pushed his face away from yours and told him he stunk.

But this was different.

Your arms loop under his own, head pressed against his chest plate. “I’m glad you’re alive too.”

Arms wrapped around your torso from behind, hair tickling your nape as the person let out a shaky breath.

“Y/N, I can’t thank you enough for being there when I shot at the Cart,” Sasha spoke quietly. “I was a bit scared if I’m being honest.”

“I was there!” Jean interrupts, pulling away from you as his arms cross over his chest, averting his eyes elsewhere. “I didn’t get my thanks..”

“Who needs you when we have Y/N?” She grins, moving around to wrap an arm around your waist. “She’s all I need to back me up, isn’t that right?”

Eren’s eyes watch as blood trickles down Jean’s arm, seeping into the black sleeve of the uniform, making a small puddle on the floor. His breathing becomes uneasy, fingers clenching around the bench he was sitting on.

His superiors and comrades are unable to move; the sound of Armin’s gun falling to the floor as he rushes to Jean; said boy lowering the body to rest on the floor. Mikasa follows suit, falling onto her knees as she grabs the left hand, shivers running up and down her arms.

Cold.

“If you didn’t do this, she wouldn’t be dead. Tell me, why is she dead, Eren?!”

I don’t know, don’t ask me, Eren thinks, wishing he could say those exact words.

But he can’t; all he can do is stare with semi wide eyes. His arms are restrained by the rope the Scouts put on him, two recruits pointing their guns at him. Despite having him on their side, there was still a fear within them that he would do something else.

“Answer me!”

“This is our first victory for the new Eldian Empire! Our first battle, and many more to come!” A crowd of soldiers raised their fists in victory, screaming at the top of their lungs as they felt like rulers; the only ones that mattered.

“Another one,” you mutter, rubbing your arm, massaging a sensitive area from when you crashed into the roof when the Beast threw rubble. “Just how many more..and will Eren still be there..”

“We seem to always follow Eren in the end. I don’t think he would be going anywhere,” jean comments, standing beside you as everyone walks towards the middle of the ship.

“Hey isn’t he still out there?” Connie asks, looking over his shoulder, staring at the open sliding door. “Should we check?”

“He’s fine. I didn’t see anyone out there when I was there.”

That’s not enough to convince Connie, his eyes still trained on the silver door but decides to shake it off, facing forward.

Everything feels too surreal right now. It’s serene; too peaceful after a massacre of Liberio’s people. Smiles and laughter are shared, everyone reuniting with their buddies, thankful they can take another breath.

However, your stomach churns, looking around a couple times before reaching your hand out, grabbing hold of Jean’s pinkie. There’s a creaking noise coming from the floor board, catching your attention.

“Jean, did you hear that?”

“No. Hey guys quiet down!”

Sasha must have heard it as well as she glances over her shoulder, a body rolling inside of the ship, a gun held close to their chest.

It happens all too slow. The child raises the gun, brown eyes full of anger stare Sasha down, her finger curling around the trigger. Her teeth are gritted as her brown strands stick to her face, small lacerations and dirt scratching at her visage.

“Sasha!”

Your body seems to move on it’s own, one foot in front of the other as your hands collide with her chest, applying force. She stares at you with warm yet wide eyes; body staggering backwards.

Jean’s words wrack every crevice of Erens mind; his voice increasing in volume.

She’s dead because of you. You killed her!

Eren’s mouth suddenly feels dry, tongue peeking out as he licks his lower lip, chewing on the inside of cheek as he exhales loudly, lowering his head in shame, afraid of the consequences.

“Did she have any last words.”

Regretting his choice of speech, Eren’s lower lips quivers, shoulders shaking slightly. With everyone’s eyes on him, he feels as if they’re staring into his soul, silently judging his choices (as some verbally let him know).

His heart is heavy as a noise leaves his mouth, nowhere near to a laugh, but not even close to a cry of sorrow. He feels like screaming until his throat is raw— to lock himself in a confined spot and to never be seen for the rest of his days on this hell on earth.

“If only you hadn’t gotten the Survey Corps involved with this, Y/N would still be alive, and would be able to see your sorry ass tomorrow in your jail cell. Maybe then she would be able to hold your hand, wouldn’t she.”

Mediterranean eyes that hold tears, glance over at your body once more. Your eyes are closed, cheeks suddenly hollowed. There’s a bandage wrapped around your torso, blood seeping through the white and drying as seconds pass.

Your whole body is relaxed , a trail of red stained on the corner of your lips.

Even with the recent tragic events, Eren can’t help but relax when he casts his gaze on your face. Something within him says that you wouldn’t blame him for the cause of your death, even if everyone else would.

But he can’t forgive himself.

“J-Jean,” you whisper, clutching weakly at his arm. “E..Eren..I want to see him..”

And all you wanted was to see him one last time— ,to spend your last breaths and tell him he wasn’t a monster.

He was just like you.

Human.

taglist: @sleepysnk @jaegerbombb @reddriot @kaqinq @kingtamakimurder @tamasoft @byougen @spike-this-ass @crimsonbows-and-arrows @thicmitten @eremiie @shisoaya @bakuhoesworld @sweetdanibear @jeanbabygirl @katsuhera @erenstars @novvabeam @basket-flower-chick @theycallmeleaf1 @simpingfor2dguys @murmikaa @izrers @panicatthe-crybaby (add yourself to the taglist HERE )

[buckybarnesdiaries]

otchet o missii

© @wintersthighs

bucky barnes x reader. ⎢ masterlist.

part one ⸺ part two ⸺ bonus

request made by anon: Hi Maria you beautiful person you please be my friend 🥺 I kinda have a request but if it doesn't speak to you then you don't have to write it, could you write something where reader is an enhanced/ mutant (kinda like Wanda or Jean Grey so like crazy powerful and dangerous) and Bucky just will not let the government get near her because he knows they'll probably experiment on her to make her a weapon cause they're sus like that? It can be romantic or platonic no preference, if ya want, please and thanks sorry this was so long

word count: 1.165 words.

warnings/tags: none. dad!bucky being overprotective with his baby soldier.

author notes: re-posted because tumblr deleted it for no reason. none of my stories contain reader’s body descriptions to be inclusive.

Join the tag list here.

“Soldat, stoy”.

(Soldier, stop).

Your eyes widened. Your heart raced. The time froze. That command clicked something in your brain, producing the spheres of flames concentrated on your palms to dwindle till disappearing. You had just one second to look around you, before turning at the firm tone of voice behind your back. You found yourself in the middle of Times Square, surrounded by different security forces, aiming at you with large-caliber weapons. Above your head, two helicopters were setting up a perimeter. The chaos spread around the long avenue. You didn't have an idea of how you ended up there, but you were scared like never before.

Turning slowly, your eyes landed on a pair of pale blue orbs. You didn’t notice the other people as a backup. A feeling of safety invaded you when he tilted his head confused, narrowing his eyes, trying to understand how it was possible that you were there. But before you could take a step closer to him, a twinge followed by an electric cramp shook your body. The last thing you heard before blacking out was an I got you, and a cold arm wrapping your abdomen.

BUCKY'S POV

Avengers Compound

06:03 pm, New York

“How do you know it’s not a trap set by Hydra?” Steve asked, reclining himself on his seat at the meeting table next to the rest of the Avengers.

“Because I trust her”. Bucky didn’t doubt replying, although he couldn’t understand why, hearing Stark clicking his tongue as he rolled his eyes.

“James, you don’t know her”. Natasha sighed, referring to the fact that being assassins together years ago meant nothing.

“I trained her. She owes me loyalty”.

“What’s that? Some kind of Stockholm Syndrome patented by Hydra?” Clint scoffed incredulously.

“Tell us what you know about her, Bucky. What you remember”. The captain asked his long-life friend, leaning on the table with both forearms rested against the edge of it.

The soldier gulped, deeply breathing, nodding his chin with his eyes lost somewhere on the dark oak. He explained how Vasily Karpov knew about you. An orphan with no family, no history, and a power of telepathy that allowed you to control the four elements as you pleased. Water, fire, earth, and air. From nowhere, your body could produce flames and throw them anywhere. Exactly the same you could do with water and air. Earth was different. Only by using your hands you could wild it as you want; creating earthquakes or holes, move it. The heroes around Bucky were stupefied. You were a potential danger.

Then, he told them about your skills. Karpov made him stay awake after killing Tony’s parents to train her. You were just a kid. And soon, you were a soldier with an angelic face who could kill anyone just by blinking your eyes. To tell the truth, the Winter Soldier was everything you had in this life. You two worked together, hand-to-hand, for more than ten years until he disappeared. With him out of the game, Hydra continued experimenting with you to replace him. But they reached a point where you couldn't bear the pain, losing control completely.

“Let me talk with her, please”. Bucky begged, touring his eyes around the people there.

“It’s too dangerous”. Vision affirmed, taking a position close to Tony.

“She. Owes. Me. Loyalty”. He repeated almost hissing, pointing out every word with his silver forefinger poking the table.

“You have five minutes before the Government brings her to the Raft”. Rhodes sentenced, crossing his arms on his chest. “Five minutes”.

Escorted by Steve and Wanda, who was the only one there that could control you, Bucky went down to the third sublevel. When the soporific made its effect and knocked you out in the middle of Manhattan, the Avengers managed to take you to their compound.

You were still stoned, but conscious enough to know what was happening around you. Everything spun inside the bunker. Your head hurt like hell and you felt a knot within the pit of your stomach that made you want to puke your guts. As the heavy door proffered a loud noise being opened you retreated to the farthest corner, placing your knees to your chest and wrapping your legs with both arms. Again, you were shaking. Terrified. About to beg for your life.

“Soldat, otchet o missii”.

(Soldier, mission report).

Your breathing became erratic as if the air wasn't enough to fill your lungs. You were at the edge of your crying, raising your hidden face from the gap of your knees. The Winter Soldier was standing some feet away from you. No expression on his face, as always, but with the small difference of a slight inkling of concern. He also looked skinnier, shorter hair, a grown beard. He looked healthier, free.

“Net zadaniya”. You whispered with a broken tone.

(No assignment).

“Soldat, otchet o missii”. He repeated taking a step ahead, hardening his voice.

(Soldier, mission report).

The command made you gulp a sob. Wasn’t he believing you? How could you lie to him?

“Net zadaniya”. You replied with no hesitation, standing on your bare feet and sticking your back to the wall. “Missiya ne naznachena”.

(No assignment. No mission assigned).

You noticed he wanted to turn to his partners, but he didn't. The soldier kept eye contact, coming a little more closer, invading your personal space without caring. He tilted his head forward, trying to find the answers to his questions in your orbs. But they both were emptied with the sole exception of the horror invading your chest and reflected on them. You didn't want to come back. You wanted to be released from Hydra's chain. You weren't an assassin, nor a monster.

“I wa… I was looking for… you”. Babbling, you confessed, being the explanation for why your mind took you to that place in concrete.

“Why?”

“Because you are the only person I have”.

His eyelids narrowed for a second, scanning your intentions, feeling frustrated by not finding anything hidden beneath your words. “Otchet o missii, soldat”.

(Mission report, soldier).

“Net zadaniya, Sergeant Barnes”.

(No assignment).

It was the first time you pronounced part of his real name since you met him many years ago and you could listen to his heartbeat increasing. Before you blinked, his metallic hand grabbed your throat and pinned you against the wall, watching the fury and the rage taking control over his grimace. Glancing above his shoulder, a redhead woman stopped the blonde man known as Captain America. Your gaze focused again on the soldier, loosening slowly the grip on your skin.

“Why don't you remember me?”

The last thing you knew about him was that the man behind him brought back the memories of his past life. His real life. But he was still looking at you with hate and revulsion. Of course, the Winter Soldier was conscious of who you were. What he had forgotten was how he felt about you. He didn't reply to your question, walking backward to the exit, leaving you there. Alone. Again.

feedback is appreciated, please, leave a comment to let me know if you liked it and/or reblog it.

author notes: what do you think about, after the two parts explaining the story, continuing it to explore the evolution of their relationship? do you like the idea? lemme know in a comment or send me an ask!

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[eternalmx]

I like it. | im changkyun

warning: just filthy...

☁️a/n : thank you for requesting sksjendj. everytime I get a kyun request I just lose my mind a little. this screenshot has taken years off my life. like I'm dead for. I have to look at it so do you <3 I hope you enjoy loves.

anon requested : Kyun + dirty talk + fluff and cockwarming after

wc | 1273

{10:24𝓹𝓶} "You're so beautiful" she said, straddling his lap. The red light illuminating the room. She gently played with his hair as his hands softly trailed up and down her sides.

"You have no idea what you do to me" Changkyun said, his grip on her waist getting tighter. His hand pulling her down so she was pressed against his growing bulge. A small moan escaped her lips.

"Mmh”she said lowly. Eyes fluttering from the pleasure that shot through her body as his hands began to move her back and forth  against his clothed erection.

“Does it feel good?” he asked, lowly. She nodded unable to speak through her heavy breathing.

“C’mon baby, use your words.” Kyun said as he held her hips in place to keep her from moving.

“F-fuck” she groaned as she let out a deep sigh and looked at him, “Please stop teasing me” she said. Her hands making their way to pull his hair as she left a trail of kisses down his neck. Low groans escaping him as he began moving her hips again.

Changkyun flipped her over so he was on top, her back flat against the bed. His hand running dangerously slow against her legs up to her thigh. Her tight black mini dress was soon pushed up and bunched at her hips. His cold fingertips running against her skin made her body shiver and goosebumps rise in her skin.

"Tell me what you want baby" he said, lips brushing against her inner thigh. Soft and right kisses being placed as his looked up at her through pieces of his long black hair.

"You." was all he needed to hear as his finger dipped below her underwear band.

"You're so wet for me" he said, eyes scanning over her body as he put pressure on her clit. His fingers rubbing small circles against her as her hips began moving with the motion of his finger.

"This feels so good" she said, as his mouth left a few marks against her hip bone.

"I can make you feel even better" he said as he slipped one finger inside of her. Her back arching off the bed earning a kiss from him on her stomach. Another finger.

"You feel so good on my fingers" Changkyun said, as he picked up his speed while pumping his finger in and out. The room filling with lewd sounds of her wetness against his fingers.

"I-im close" she moaned. Throwing her head back into the pillows.

"Cum for me then" he said. His voice low, as he leaned down to press kisses against her skin. A few more kisses and thrust of his fingers her eyes filling with white. Shutting closed, the familiar euphoric feeling taking over her body as she came undone.

"You look so beautiful like this" Changkyun said. Kissing up her chest to her face. He placed soft kisses all over her face as he waited for her breathing to calm down.

"I want more" she whispered against his skin. Eyes still closed as she took in his scent of rose and musk.

"Are you sure?" he asked. His arms on either side of her head. She nodded her head as her hands made their way down his chest to unbuckle his pants. He smiled at her softly eyes filling back up with lust.

He pushed her hands off of his pants, causing her to make a small pouty face at him. He brought his hand up to her face and pushed the hair out of her eyes.

"Say it" he said. "Tell me exactly what you want from me."

"I want you to fuck me" she said. Arms wrapping around his waist as she pushed him closer to her heated core.

"You wish is my command" he said, giving her a cocky grin before allowing her hand to slip past the waist band of his boxers. His pants pushed down off of him onto the floor as her hands played with his cock.

"If you want me to cum inside of you, I suggest you stop doing that" Changkyun said, through gritted teeth as she felt him twitch in her hand. She moved her hands to push his boxes off as he helped.

The tip of his cock teasingly running against her folds as he positioned himself at her entrance. She moaned as he pushed through her walls causing her back to arch.

"F-fuck, no matter how many times I fuck you you're always so tight for me" he groaned, leaning down to press his chest against hers.

"R-right there" she said, as he began thrusting into her. Picking up the pace as their moans grew louder, filling the room. The sound was almost like music to his ears.

"You take my cock so well babe" he moaned in between thrust. Kissing her roughly and swallowing her moans. The sounds filling the room only made her core wetter and her body more sensitive to the pleasure she was receiving. Changkyun used his free hand to gently wrap his hands around her throat causing her to become a shaking mess underneath him.

"Are you close?" he asked, his hot breath running down her neck as he kissed and nipped at her neck. Littering her neck with his marks. She was to high off the pleasure to for a sentence and only nodded a she pinched her eyes shut. His hand releasing her neck made its way down to her clit rubbing thought circles as he continued to thrust in and out of her.

"Come on babe, let go" he said as he slowed his pace. His strokes getting deeper than before making her legs go numb.

"B-baby, please don't stop" she moaned, hips moving along with his to create more friction. His hands pinning her waist to the bed so she couldn't moved against his.

"You looks so beautiful underneath me" he said, as she began crying out his name as she released her want juices on him. Changkyun kept moving his hips this time desperately chasing his high and she began feeling another knot in her stomach.

"K-kyun" she moaned loudly as she felt his cock twitch inside her as her walls clench. Both their highs crashing down on them as they laid there for a second. He softly rolled her over so her leg was over his waist as they both layer face to face.

"Are you okay?" he asked, brushing the hair stuck to her face from sweat out of the way. She closed her eyes and softly nodded with a him. Still unable to catch her breath.

He was beginning to slide out of her when she grabbed both his arms and held him in place.

"I want to stay like this for a bit" she said, cheeks growing red as she realised what she was saying.

"A-are you sure?" he's asked, before she nodded and he pulled her closer.

"I like it" he said softly in her hair. She looked up at him and smiled softly.

"I love you so much" she said, admiring him. His hair. His nose. His moles. His eyes. His skink glistening from the sweat. The way his eyes were heavy from his previous state of euphoria. His soft voice.

"I love you so much baby" he said, kissing her head as he engulfed her in a hug. His sudden movement causing them both to let out a low moans. She shot him a warning glance.

"I can't take cuming for the fourth time tonight" she said, playfully hitting his hand.

"It wouldn't be the first time would it?" he said, earning a disgusted look from her as he broke into laughter.

[lovely-jily]

hi warning i cried while writing this, but don't be mad at me because i'm just giving you more content for your therapy session!

im sorry in advance

James's lips were soft against Lily's, his touch just as gentle. He gingerly held one hand on her back while the other rested in the back of her head, entangled in her fiery hair.

They got together in mid September , and James fell just as the leaves did as the weather turned colder. Something about her made him forget about the war going on, about all the evil that was not only present in the world but was targeting her specifically. She brightened up the dark and heavy world that was brewing outside the walls of Hogwarts. Even when one of her neighbours, a muggle family, was found dead over Christmas.

They were sitting side by side on the couch in the Head's office, firelight dancing around the walls. They had long given up on their paperwork and instead got to work on each other, something they had done too often nowadays.

Her hands were rested on his jaw and entangled in his curls, grasping as Lily increased passion.

James, feeling rather excited as the 17-year-old would be, brought his hand to her cheek. It was soft and... And wet?

Immediately he pulled away, glancing at her face. It was flushed and sticky with tears, causing James's heart to drop to his stomach. She had been silently crying. Hard.

"Hey, what's going on?" He asked, voice filled with concern. This seemed to come on suddenly, as they had only been kissing a couple minutes. Moments before they were having their usual friendly banter, joking about who did the most work between the two. They hadn't mentioned anything of the war or the loss of her neighbours, which had of course that loss left a cold pit of fear inside both of them. While it had only been a month, Lily said she stopped having nightmares. If she was still upset to the point of tears, she hadn't let on.

James felt stupid. It would certainly still be affecting her immensely; how could it not? Her back was stained with a muggle-born shaped target, and he knew she couldn't ever feel safe as long as the war brewed on, killing muggle-borns and blood traitors alike.

She turned her face away as he tried to reach for her face, urgently wiping at her eyes and cheeks and sniffing, "It's nothing."

She faced him, a small smile forcing the corners upwards on the lips James was just kissing. She reached for him, but he grabbed her wrists and pushed her back gently.

"Lils, what's going on? Don't even attempt to tell me that it's nothing," His voice was low and soft, the concern pulling his eyebrows together. His expression was struck with worry, and this was precisely what she was afraid of.

"I don't want to worry you," She looked down, voice barely loud enough to hear. She then looked up at her, green eyes swimming with tears, "We do too much of that."

"Lily, you can't make that decision for me. Besides," He gently cupped her face in his hands, pushing away the strands of hair that were stuck in her tears, "Whether you want me to or not, I spend every waking moment worrying about you. You might as well make it easier on me and tell me exactly what I should be worrying about instead of me trying to guess."

She chuckled softly and leaned into his touch, bringing her hands to his forearms. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, before sadness overtook her face again.

"I'm afraid," She said, taking a sharp and shaky inhale, clearly failing at calming herself down.

"Of course you are," James said, pulling her into his lap and stroking her hair, "I would find it strange if you weren't."

"No, James," She pushed back slightly, looking at him with tearful eyes, "I just-"

Her voice choked up, and she let out a harsh sob.

Watching this was horrendously painful to James. The love of his life was breaking down in front of him, and there was nothing he could do about it.

"You just what?"

"I've just spent so much of my life hating you, and it breaks my heart because what if-" She let out another sob as the tears started to fall, moving her hands to his face, "What if something happens and I end up spending more time hating you than I did loving you."

The lump in James's throat grew as the words found their way into his chest, stabbing into his heart. What was full of so much love just moments ago now felt damaged and cracked, all its contents leaking out of it.

She didn't say anything either and simply buried her head into the nape of his neck. There she sobbed heavily, wrapping her arms around him and grasping tightly at his shoulders.

James held her tightly as a tear fell down his cheek. The world was vile, cruel, and unfair for several reasons, but the only thing he could think about was how angry he was at it for making her feel this way. She was days away from being eighteen. She should be worried about her N.E.W.T'S, not their lives.

James let out a deep breath he didn't realize he was holding. He could be angry later. This moment wasn't about him.

"You know you can't think like that," He said quietly, the words feeling as heavy outside of his mouth as they were inside. He knew that they were pointless. Nothing he could say or do would make her feel better, and that's the things James hated the most. There wasn't anything James wouldn't do for the people he loved, especially Lily. He had long since decided that if he was going to die in this war, it would be for the people he loved.

"I know," She said into his neck, sniffing softly. She wasn't crying as hard now and her breath was starting to steady, "But how can I not?"

James looked up at the ceiling, fighting for the right words. She was right. He'd be lying if he hadn't thought of similar things. He'd be lying if he said he didn't wake up sweaty and panicked after dreaming about losing her.

He inhaled and tried his best to give her some real and honest hope.

"We both know that I can't promise you lots, and I can't promise you that nothing terrible will ever happen," He started, receiving a shaky sob from Lily that gutted him, "But I can promise you that I will spend every second of every day fighting my damn near hardest, just for the smallest chance that I could spend the rest of my life with you."

Lily looked up at him, her bottom lip stopped quivering and she let out a soft, sad smile that she used to kiss him gently. James was crying too at this point, overwhelmed by love and sadness alike.

"I love you, James," She said quietly, her smile was softer now, looking a little more hopeful despite the lingering sadness in her emerald eyes.

"I love you more."

She took a shaky breath and said softly, "Let's try our best to move on, yeah?"

It was her turn to gingerly wipe his tears. She had stopped crying and held his gaze, love pouring from her green to his hazel before she softly kissed his damp cheeks.

"Nothing good comes from dwelling on the past. We can't change it, as hard as we may try."

He nodded and squeezed her tightly as she kissed him again, hands on his face.

They slept on the couch that night, holding each other a little tighter than they usually did.

We now know that Lily's worst fears came true, and that James more than perfectly fulfilled his promise, but it's important to note that Lily loved James so much more than she ever hated him. And to them, that's what mattered.

[spikesbimbo]

Say Please

Summary:  Dilf Daddy Spikes rest stop

Paring: Spike Spiegel x Reader

Tags: oral sex, spit kink, age gap, smoke kink, bimbo gf

wc: 2.3k

a/n: for my daddy, my superhero yes i said it was was coming out in a few days, but i did it today bc dilf spike was the only thing on my mind.

-

“Fuck.” 

You turned and saw him mumbling curses walking through the door. His messy hair, messier now than when he left. Specks of grey flicked in there, wanting to run your fingers though it, so soft you thought.

“You okay?” you asked, eyes bigger as you watched him walk towards the couch, laying one of his guns down on the table.

“No baby, c'mere.'' he said, dragging you into his lap, playing with the hem of your mini skirt barely covering the swell of your ass. His hands resting on it, sneaking his fingers up there, making their way under the strap of your panties.

You were his warmth in the cold vastness of space. Relaxing whenever he was around you, being the only thing he would look forward to coming back to. Not the annoying kids and women he had to deal with daily, their attitudes nothing compared to yours, his sweet angel.

You looked up at him, seeing the stubble grow as he'd been gone for a day and a half, not caring about taking care of himself. Which you took into your own hands, wanting to treat him the way he deserved. Him being the only reason you were alive.

------------------------------------------------------------------------

After saving you, you instantly fell for him, shyly flirting with him, until one night the tension got too high and yall fucked.

Waking up in the morning seeing he didn't care, you just went on about your day until it turned night again as he knocked on your door. Remembering him saying “you sure” before placing his lips on yours, immediately picking you up and taking you to his room, almost tripping over the dog how fast he was walking. God damn he hated that dog.

And after this it happened a few more times. Then one day you confessed your love for him after drinking too much, you crying as he watched the scene unfold before leaving the ship. Leaving you to cry even more, worried that he was going to get rid of you like they did, worried that he left his gun.

He left his gun, yes. He was so shocked he just left, face unfazed but his mind was racing. Did you say that because you were drunk? Because he's the only man you've ever been with, the only man that hasn't treated you like shit.

He came back to you lying on the couch, eyes red and closed asleep with the dog cuddled in your arms. Curled up like a baby, knowing you were cold, so he went and got a blanket. Laying it on you while sitting next to you, looking intensely at your pretty face wondering if what you said was true.

You, a pretty young thing with a life ahead of her, with him? An old man that was a bounty hunter for a living?

You stumbled in your sleep, feeling right next to you, being a light sleeper after what happened to you. Opening your swollen eyes faintly seeing his hand resting on you. Quickly trying to get up stumbling, the effects of the alcohol not wavering yet, but luckily he was there to catch you. Your hands started shaking along with your eyes starting to water again. “M-sor-” 

He pulled you in, his lips touching yours, placing his big warm hand on the back of your head. Holding it gently as he pulled you closer to him. Wrapping his other arm around your waist, pulling you into his lap. 

You confirming that you actually had feelings for him while he pulled you into his arms, kissing you on the top of your head while mumbling out how he was sorry for just leaving like that. 

“Im not going anywhere doll.”

------------------------------------------------------------------

“God damn, I got a headache” He said, pulling the cigarettes out of his pocket, wanting the stress to be gone completely as he adjusted you in his lap so he could do so. Wrapping his arm tight around your waist, fingers gripping onto that tiny shirt you were wearing, exposing your cleavage right in his face. 

Your eyes still so innocent as he kissed you again, lightly but passionately as he turned you to face him completely. Chest to chest while he lit the cigarette between his fingers, using you as a shield from the air flowing.

“Spike...”  you said just loud enough for him to hear, dragging your fingers down his chest looking down as you waited for his response.

“Hmm?” he said, placing his hands on your hips, resting the cigarette between his index and finger. Blowing out the smoke as he moved his head down under to look up at your hidden face.

Your body grew with heat as you could feel his bulge under your panties, internally thinking that maybe you should've worn pants, but you didn't have any. All you had were the skirts he bought you.

“Hmm baby?” he said again, his hand free of the cigarette moving up to your throat, gently grabbing the base of it to force you to look at him. “You wanna take care of me? Like you always do?”

You nodded, body itching to move as your white cotton panties grew clearer with each touch. Yes you babied him, but he took care of you. You couldn't do anything on your own, not knowing how to read, write, even cook. 

But you were trying; studying while he was gone with the books he ‘borrowed’, and making dinner every night. At least trying, the only thing you were good at was cheese bread, but luckily he would eat anything.

“What a sweetheart, such a good girl.” he cooed, taking a puff from the snout. Dick growing harder by the second as he thought about the last time you ‘helped’ him out. He took his lips off blowing the smoke in your face, just how he knew you liked it. “Not like these other bitches, no ... I got me an angel.”

You got off his lap, he fingers slowly being dragged away as you tried to hold back your smile. You loved making him feel good, it being the only thing you were truly good at, but you had no shame. Some people were gifted in different things, yours was making your man feel good.

“Woah baby, can't see everywhere at once.”  he teased, watching you strip for him. Taking off that top exposing your bare chest, pulling down your soaked panties clinging to your thighs. Eyes looking all over your figure as you were only in that oh so tiny skirt now, being pushed up to just cover your aching cunt, so embarrassing.

You got on your knees, already palming his crotch, head resting on his thigh as you waited for him to tell you if it was okay. Mouth already watering at the thought of gagging on him, the thought of him fucking your face, then maybe you.

“off.” you whined as he stroked your head, hand under your chin; looking at you intensely, eyes not leaving you once as you pulled his pants down freeing his erection.��

It slapping him against his stomach, hard as could be, so neglected. But it's okay, you were here to relax him, ease him, make him feel the best he ever has.

“Open up” he said, tensing his jaw. His fingers spreading your lips letting themselves in before  he let his spit fall into yours. A string of droll connecting you two. Pulling back and watching his mix with yours on your tongue, letting it drool in your mouth, before he leaned back, giving the okay.

You turned your attention to his cock, so hard and pretty. The vein on the underside begging to be touched, the tip so fat that you couldn't take it anymore. 

You let your tongue hang out, your spit dripping onto the head before connecting your lips to it. Kissing all over it, sucking it like a lollipop while moving your hands to play with his balls, wanting to get him real worked up.

“So pretty.” you mumbled out, kissing on its side before taking it in your mouth, its fat heavy weight resting on your tongue. His downturned eyes looking at you take him whole, groaning at the feeling of the warmth surrounding his cock. Moving himself up to see you better, wanting to imprint this pretty picture in his memory.

His sweet baby with his balls at her chin, eyes watering in pleasure, so precious. His shoulders still tense as he wrapped his hand around your head once again.

“You mind doll?” he asked as if you could respond. You did your best to shake your head with his fat cock stretching your mouth out, wanting him to use you, loving it. 

Loving when he tied you up and fucked you like some street whore, loving it when he woke you up in the middle of the night to ride him because his dick was hard. You loved it, loved being his toy.

His hand encompassing your whole head within it started pushing your head back and forth, starting slowly even though you could take it. At first you couldn't even fit it in your mouth, choking on it after the tip was in, but after a lot of practice and praise you were an expert at this, even deeper throating him with no prep.

“Fuck, baby… you’re mouth is so good. Such a little hole for me to use” he said, gripping the back of your neck, using it to control your movements, bobbing your head faster while you whimpered at the feeling of his tip in the back of your throat.

“You like that? You like me telling you how well you take my cock in that cute little mouth of yours, huh?”

His words made you whimper again, his cock throbbing at the vibrations. Your eyes gleaming up at him, looking at him pleadingly. The salty taste of pre-cum and the ache of your jaw was addicting, too addicting.

He saw the fat tears getting ready to fall onto your eyelashes and felt an emptiness of heat fuse in his stomach. His angel was so perfect, so good and submissive for him. He felt his balls start to swell as his body tensed up to orgasm, ready to blow.

“I’m gonna cum, doll. Im close… fuck. You feel so tight. You gonna swallow it all, sweetheart or you want me to pull out? You gave him the look you always did, just wanting his cum, not caring how you got it. Him immediately understanding. “You gonna be my good girl?”

His cock so hot now that was taking up all the room in your mouth and was starting to twitch and throb. You used your tongue, licking against the underside vein and closed your lips of the way back, pulling in your cheeks like he taught you

“Ah… fuck. I’m cumming, fuck baby. Fuck”

You felt the hot cum reach the back of your throat choking on it, some of the cum spilling out the sides with his cock still on your mouth  as he pulled out and let the remaining cum be painted on your face. “Bang.”  he muttered under his breath.

You kept everything in your mouth, holding back the urge to cough, wanting to show it to him proudly. Your cheeks puffy as he came down from his high admiring your appliance, eyes meeting yours, as he took your jaw in between his fingers opening your mouth to see for himself. Knowing you loved his approval.

“Such a good girl… letting me cum all over you, wherever I want. What a pretty girl.”

He squished your cheeks, making some of it fall out to your protest. Kissing you for being so irresistible, his thumb tracing your lips after, his saliva and cum staining them prettily.

“Swallow angel.”

He peeked down after you moaned, seeing your thighs reflecting off the lamp so soaked and messy, leaving a wet spot underneath you. Your legs shaking as his cock grew harder again at the sight.

“I got you, baby. I’m gonna you feel good, gonna make it all feel better. ”

[jungxk]

crush

filed under. i totally forgot i wrote this. also i like the name eunmi sue me 

notes. thank you to @lonelyending for reading thru this crusty story and making me feel good enough about it again to post it. also @suga-kookiemonster bc im pretty sure i sent u this like a year ago and u told me to post it it but....i forgot abt it shdgjsgd. writing/life in general has been hard recently so pls accept this kookfic to hold yous over until i update just one

genre. fluff, light comedy, light angst, smut

warnings. smut (oral sex: f receiving, penetrative unprotected sex) 

length. 5.1k

the first thing jungkook thinks when he sees you is wow.

he hasn't been up for very long, and you don't even know he's looking at you through the window. yoongi-hyung has wrapped you up in his arms as you sob and sob, muted behind the protective hospital glass. even with messy hair and wet eyes he's starstruck. it's why he recoils slightly when jimin and namjoon explain to him that you're his wife.

"my," he can't even say the word. "my..."

"your wife," namjoon repeats. "you know what a wife is, right? marriage?"

"yes," jungkook huffs, digging his nails into his scalp. "i lost my memory, hyung, not my fucking brain cells." 

he suddenly registers the gold band glistening on his left hand, simple and heavy. he has to take a second to collect himself. "but...but i'm twenty-three. right? i am twenty-three, yeah?"

"yeah. you are," jimin says softly.

"then how the fuck am i already married? not that i'm complaining i just," he suddenly turns pink at the thought of you in a wedding dress, clinging onto his arm, breakfast dates, late night ramen runs at the convenience store, painting the living room in a house you probably share, naked in bed on top of him. jungkook clears his throat. "it just seems a little out of character for me. i can't commit to a pair of shoes for a week let alone-"

"i think it's best if you just spoke with ____," jimin finishes before jungkook can work himself into a frenzy, a comforting hand laying on his shoulder. "you two need to talk anyway and it's best if all these answers came from her."

jungkook gulps at the thought of speaking to you, seeing you face to face. suddenly he's a cripplingly shy fourteen year old again.

"okay." he croaks. "okay."

x

x

x

you were even more beautiful up close.

your tear stained cheeks are glowing and blotchy when you perch on the chair beside his bed, big eyes fluttering up at him nervously. you're soft and plush and shorter than he thought and jungkook has to fist his hands in the sheets and play a counting game with the heart rate monitor in order to maintain eye contact. he feels himself start to sweat when you smile sadly at him. "sorry, i just...i don't know how to be around you normally without making you uncomfortable," you say quietly, wringing your hands together to avoid touching him.

"uncomfortable?" he queries, gaze latching onto the ring on your hand. seeing it on you gives him a nice feeling.

you nod into your lap. "yeah, um..." you look at your scuffed shoes, searching for the word. "we're usually very...touchy."

he can feel himself turning red again. "t-touchy?"

you meet his eyes and a pretty smile breaks over your face at how bashful he looks, making jungkook's cheeks tinge even pinker than they already are. you nod cutely so your earrings tinkle, eyes shining, and suddenly he understands without any context why he fell in love with you, why he married you so young. you let a comfortable silence settle over the room before taking a deep breath, bracing yourself. "how much do you remember, jungkook?"

he tries not to cave under the weight of his guilt. "not a lot about...you, that is," he finishes with a wince, your sad eyes immediately making him wilt with shame. "i remember everything up until a couple of years ago. we had a show at the japanese dome, debuted in america, and then...nothing. and now..."

"and now," you echo softly. your eyes look distant, staring at the floor.

"i'm sorry," jungkook whispers, chin touching his chest. "hyung told me...they all told me how much i loved you and...and i'm sorry i don't remember any of it. i'm so sorry."

you shake your head gently. "don't be sorry, jungkook-ah," the pet name makes his ears perk up. its a familiar, calming sound. "none of this is your fault. you didn't ask to get hit by that car." your expression turns remorseful, tugging at his heart. "if anything, this is because of me. the only reason you were out was because i asked you to go and get eggs and formula even though i should've remembered to pick some up on the way home and-"

"no, no! please don't blame yourself," jungkook tries, wishing he was close enough or even brave enough to take your hand. you look up at him and he catches a glimpse of the endless pool of love you harbour for him, like a punch to the chest. "i don't ever want you thinking this was your fault. so ple-" he pauses. "wait, formula?"

the door bursts open before he can finish, pitter patter steps rounding his bed until it reaches the other side, where you sit. a little girl with big dark eyes and curls of dark hair stares at him in wonder and elation, her cheeks dimpling just like yours before she screeches, "appa!"

jungkook's mouth goes dry. appa?

you're quick to intervene, putting yourself in the toddlers path to scoop her up in your arms. her grabby little hands struggle over your shoulder, fingers wriggling in attempt to get as close to jungkook as possible. he only stares with wide eyes and an open mouth, heart hammering in his chest when he sees the uncanny resemblances: his round nose. your brown skin but just a twinge fairer. his hooded eyes. and his stomach lurches.

"shhh, eunmi," you coo as you carry her away even with her squirming. "remember what i said before? appa is sick. appa is sick, baby-"

"we have a child?" jungkook wheezes, eyes starting to glaze over. there's a bout of silence when you look back at him guiltily, the baby's fumbling grinding to a halt when she registers the tension in the air. jungkook's breath is barely a whisper. "is that my daughter?"

your face crumples with a fresh bout of tears and eunmi looks on worriedly. she pushes her little lips into your cheek in a baby's kiss, like she's seen her father do so many times to get your attention. the word "amma," is muffled into your skin until you get yourself together and press a short kiss to her head.

yoongi rushes in, face twisted in apology. "i swear to god i turned around for one minute and-"

"it's okay, yoongi," you say quietly, stroking the baby's head. "eunmi, stay with uncle just a bit longer, okay? amma will be back in a minute..."

"appa," she whines over your shoulder, reaching for jungkook who sits helplessly in his bed. he watches with tears wetting his eyelashes, heart twisting in agony at the sight of his child he doesn't remember stretching her arms out for him. she begins to cry when he doesn't react or coo her. like he used to.

"take her, yoongi," you say shakily, passing the baby to him. the sound of eunmi's crying makes your heart shatter all over again, yoongi's quiet hushing doing nothing to qualm her sobbing as the heavy door closes behind them.

the silence that falls between the two of you is nothing short of excruciating. jungkook's head spins, completely overwhelmed: is that why you both got married so young? because of a child? was this why jimin and namjoon wouldn't say a damn thing about his life until he spoke to you first?

and then all the other questions that followed: was he a good father? when was his daughter's birthday? did she like kimchi and banana milk too? did he sing to her? read to her often?

would she ever forgive him for not being able to remember her?

"her name is eunmi," you say, looking down at the floor when jungkook starts to cry.

x

x

x

jungkook doesn't understand how his baby could be so pretty. she's golden brown like those sandy beaches on postcards, with chubby cheeks and twinkling dark eyes that resemble yours to a t, and that's when he realises of course she's beautiful. she's yours. you balance eunmi on your hip while you make coffee - decaf, since you're still weaning - and despite the amnesia jungkook feels like he's been here before, in this warm, happy place that is the kitchen.

"she got your nose though," you remind him, dumping the baby in his lap upon her fussing. she always seemed to wind down under his touch, and although nervous about the sudden responsibility of fatherhood, jungkook is compelled to give it. eunmi doesn't understand anything's changed so he doesn't see why he should act like it. "she's whiny before her milk too. like you."

"hey!" he retorts, but can't exactly defend himself. he twirls his fingers around her curly pigtails until she catches on and tries to stand on his thighs, reaching for his hair to yank. jungkook lets her. he's barely known his daughter a week and he's already so smitten he'd let her gut him open with a butter knife.

"she missed you, you know. when you were in hospital all this time," you say, making him look up to watch you stare into your drink. the fear still lingers in your eyes, faint and persistent. he can see it every time you look at him and it makes his body yearn to touch you like he once did, like he once would have before his brain unlearned everything his heart didn't. you laugh while watching eunmi pull his hair again, making him hiss. "even yoongi tried but no one coddles her as much as you."

"really?" he asks, face lighting up. he's so happy to hear that. jungkook hates the way the question bubbles up in the back of his throat, like it'd make a difference or it'd change how he felt. but he has to ask it. "is that why...is that why we got married so early, then?" he says, trying to sound as offhand as possible. "because of eunmi?"

you chew your lip. "yeah. i mean, you said it wasn't a big deal. because you were going to marry me eventually so it didn't make a difference, but...it doesn't really matter i guess, because that's not what everyone else thinks," you pause, tracing the rim of your mug again. "that's certainly not what your fans think."

jungkook doesn't even want to think about it. the backlash, the gossip, the name calling and dehumanisation. for the first time in his life jungkook couldn't give less of a shit about his reputation. "i'm sorry," he says, feeling like the word has lost meaning by now with how much he's said it. "i'm so sorry. not for this, for us or for eunmi. i don't regret any of that i just," he shifts the baby in his lap, still getting used to her weight. "i can only imagine what you went through."

you look a bit bewildered. "...you said that last time too." you smile again reassuringly. "please don't feel solely responsible, kook-ah. you didn't exactly get me pregnant on your own."

he flushes tomato red and you giggle at him until eunmi joins in too.

x

x

x

jungkook can't keep his eyes off you while you play with the baby, comb out her hair, sing her lullabies while you bathe her together. he'd always wanted a whirlwind romance as a teen and it looks like he finally got it, because he can feel himself fall head first in love with you (all over again). it didn’t make sense for someone to be so collected and easygoing after having motherhood forced onto you so abruptly. you tell him often that he's a picture-perfect dad, but jungkook still doubts he compares.

"does she need a change?" he asks, struggling to keep all of eunmi's wriggling limbs in his grip.

"nope, just hungry," you say, reaching out when he passes the baby to you. you're about to stand up and go to the guest room to feed her, but jungkook is already arranging the pillows next to him for you, grabbing a baby cloth on the side too.

"do you need another pillow?" he muses aloud, but he's already grabbing the ones on his side of the bed before you can answer, forming a wedge for you to sit nicely beside him. he looks up at you when you fail to move. "are you okay?"

"yeah i, um," you chew your lip nervously. "you don't...mind me feeding here?"

you immediately regret the question once it leaves your mouth. jungkook's crestfallen expression hits you right in the stomach, round eyes glittering up at you. he hasn't looked this upset since he woke up nearly a month ago. "why would i ever mind?”

"oh jungkook," you sniff, sitting beside him. he pulls you into the nest of pillows beside him, arm winding protectively around your shoulders. your eyes brim with sympathy tears, tired and angry and upset with treating him like a stranger.

"if i make you feel uncomfortable, i can go," he offers quietly. "if it makes you feel weird i understand..."

"no, not at all," you rush to stop him, suddenly realising how close you are. you could kiss his pink little lips if you just tilted your head up. "i just didn't want to make you feel weird. all this new stuff is happening to you, you're suddenly a husband and a father with no recollection of signing up or it and i just...i don't know how much you want to invest the second time around," you scramble to finish your sentence when he pins you with a concerned expression. “as in, i understand if you don’t want to make the same choice twice. it’s a big decision.”

he shakes his head dismissively. there wasn't a thing in the world that could make him turn his back on his family but it looked like you still needed convincing. he peers at you curiously when you position the baby. "so i can stay?"

you smile at him eagerly. "of course," you undo the nursing strap of your bra before the baby finally latches. "i actually prefer it when you're here. it makes me feel safe."

jungkook watches quietly while you hum for the baby, playing with her little hand while she drinks. the adoration seeps out of him in waves, how serene you look while you rock her, how angelic eunmi looks while she blinks her big doll eyes up at you both. she won't stay this little forever. he feels so overwhelmed by it, gathering you further in his arms with the urge to hold his family in his hands like a diamond. you don't question the little sniffles jungkook buries into your hair, resting your head on his shoulder wordlessly. you missed being held by him, missed his cotton scent and gentle breath.

"i love her so much," he whispers into the shell of your ear, entranced by the baby's little gurgles and gulps. he reaches out to run his knuckle over the velvet of her cheek, round and stuffed with milk. "i feel like i'll die, i love her so much."

"me too," you smile. "it was scary and hard for a long time but...i'm so glad we had her. i wouldn't trade her for anything."

you feel jungkook's lips trace your temple, heart stuttering upon the sudden contact. you hear what he doesn’t say: i wouldn't trade either of you.

x

x

x

"why are you so sweaty?" jimin scowls, noting the dark patches under jungkook's t-shirt when he tries to take the baby from his arms. "it's not even humid today."

jungkook doesn't do anything but gulp and cuddle a sleeping eunmi closer to his chest. she's become somewhat of a security blanket for him; even if she wasn't awake to play, he was always itching to hold her and nuzzle into her head when he's tense or embarrassed. like now.

"leave him alone, you know he sweats when he's shy," yoongi grins.

"stop it," jungkook mumbles.

"shy? what for?"

"because he's got a crush on his wife," namjoon snickers, knowing jungkook would whack him one if his arms weren't around his kid. "why are you looking at me like that? it's true!"

"but you can't just say it! she'll hear!" he hisses.

"you're married," jimin deadpans but it only makes the younger boy curl in on his baby more. "god, this reminds of when you two met. remember how he used to hide behind manager hyung every time ____ came in? and then i had to listen to them fuck in the next room for a year only to end up back here all over again-"

"jungkook," you call. "where did these come from?" you walk into the sitting room with a bouquet of yellow roses nestled in your arms. "did a fan send them? i didn't see a note they were just on the worktop-"

"th-those are for you," he mumbles. "i got those for you."

you look so pretty when you stare it makes him sweat harder and the three older boys all but burst a vein in their head trying not to laugh when leaving the room. there's an awkward silence where you clutch the flowers and he clutches the baby. "thank you," you say finally. "they're beautiful, i love the colour yellow..."

his big doe eyes round up to look at you even though the lower half of his face is smushed into pigtails. "you're welcome."

"can i kiss you?" you blurt out, too fast to stop it. your cheeks are still stinging and you're pretty sure you have baby powder in your hair but jungkook looks at you with awe as he nods so vigorously his earrings shake.

so you do, leaning over the arm of the sofa to press your mouth over his long enough for both your breaths to catch. you pull away, moving to sit next to him so his free arm can wind around your shoulders when you kiss him again. "please," he mumbles when you part. "please don't ask to kiss me. just do it," he leans for another long, warm kiss that leaves you light headed. "stop tip-toeing around me, okay? we're married. i know i scare easy, but not that easy."

you feel giddy, finally feeling the weight being lifted piece by piece. "okay," you peck his mole endearingly before scooting up for another kiss. "i missed this."

"me too," he hums into your mouth. "it feels like the first time but also...not the first time, you know? not just because i don't remember but like," he doesn't know how to say it, wetting his lips thoughtfully. your chapstick is cherry flavoured, his favourite. "like we've been doing this for longer than both of us even realise. longer than this life."

"i know," you nod. "i know."

x

x

x

after a while, you forgot about jungkook's amnesia altogether. even though the chances of him making a full recovery were slim, it all felt so normal and back to routine, all the kissing and the cuddling and the playing with eunmi. there was almost no room for trepidation anymore. until now.

you moan into jungkook's mouth when he pulls you onto his thighs, big hands palming your ass when you grind into him. he's only mildly concerned that he'll cum in his pants at this rate but he doesn't fret too much: that was secondary to undressing you and touching you and pleasing you and making you scream as loud as he could make you without waking the baby. he has nearly three years of re-learning your body to catch up on and he's eager to start.

he's quickly reminded during this process that you are a master. you know exactly where to kiss him, exactly how much pressure to kneed into his cock with your hips, exactly how much tongue he wants in his mouth until he's whining and damp for you. of course you know his body like the back of your hand - your child wasn't conceived from thin air. it makes him all the more desperate to learn, almost antsy to get his mouth and hands on you until you're writhing and breathless beneath him.

you gasp when you feel his hand slip between your legs, rubbing his fingers over your shorts. you automatically rock your covered wetness into his touch, the long whimper you muffle into his neck sending jungkook soaring through the clouds with pride. you're so lost in the feeling, having missed it so much, you're barely able to squeak a stop! when he hooks his fingers inside the waistband of your panties.

his eyes shoot open. "what's wrong?"

"j-jungkook," you shuffle in his grip, feeling so embarrassed under his scrutiny you don't know where to look. "it's not that i want you to stop but. listen, just," you cling to his shoulders, shivering when his hands drag reassuringly up to your waist. "just remember that...i've had a kid, okay? i'm not gonna look like before."

he blinks. "i don't remember what you looked like before."

"no, i mean like," you lick your lips, tasting him there. "it's still something to keep in mind. i'm not gonna be as smooth and perky in places like all those idol girls you perform next to, so just-" he watches you fumble nervously in his lap, the growing disbelief making him blink. "don't expect too much okay? things might not look the way you imagine them to and i don't want you to feel-"

"stop," he cuts off, tugging you so you're seated over his erection again. the look jungkook pins you with is so intense you can feel your pulse thrum in your ears, the harsh rise and fall of his chest making him appear that much more passionate. "this body," he slips his hands up your top, palming your skin. "made my child. i take offence to it being spoken about with anything less than admiration, even by you."

"kook-ah," you say nervously, but still let him remove your pj top over your head before you laying you under him on the bed. you don't know why your eyes suddenly prick with tears when he traces over your stretch marks and discoloured skin with his smooth lips. "this kept my daughter warm," he kisses under your navel, sliding up to your heavy breasts. he kisses each darkened nipple, swollen from the baby's mouth. "these feed her." he rises further still, before planting his mouth on your forehead in a short peck. "and this raises her. so how can i be anything but proud to touch you?"

"jungkook, stop," you sniff, tears wetting your lashes. your eyes fall shut when he wipes them away with his thumb, lips ghosting over your cheeks and nose.

"what did i say about tip-toeing around me?" he whispers, forcing you to look him in the eye. only then do you see the tears there, all the ardour and respect he holds for you pooling in those brown depths. "i'm your husband. let me be your husband."

you kiss him before you can start crying again, letting him part your mouth and taste you long and hard before finally undressing himself and slipping your shorts off. this is all a first for him, and it's been so long since you've done this it's almost like a first for you too, frantic and messy and desperate to feel jungkook lodged inside you where he belongs. you know he must share the sentiment when he splits your thighs over the narrow of his hips, hooking them there while he gets a good look of his erection rubbing through your slick.

no wonder i knocked her up, jungkook muses faintly. i don't think i can ever stop doing this.

"jungkook, please," you run a hand through his hair, grinding against his cock in encouragement but he still won't take the plunge. instead, your voice reminds him of his initial objective, causing him to saunter down between your legs faster than you can process. he's licking into you before you can have a second thought about it, mouth falling open with a loud moan when he traces around your clit in firm circles.

he has your knees over his shoulders and his arms wound around your hips so you have nowhere to go, nothing to do but buck into his attentive mouth, jungkook's groans vibrating against you until you can barely keep yourself together - he's always enjoyed this as much as you have. which is why he takes his time, explores every crevice and subsequent response, relishing in the gush of wetness when he does something right. he even goes as far as holding his tongue stagnant against your folds so you have no choice but to rub yourself into him for friction, so entranced he is by your invigorating reactions. only when you're squirming and whimpering with deliriousness does he finally give in and resume a steady pace over your swollen clit, two fingers sliding in home so you have something to come around. and you do.

messy and wet and shrieking into the pillow by your head so that you're muffled enough to not wake the baby down the hall, your orgasm drawing out longer than normal as you do your best to ride it out. jungkook carries you through it, gulping down as much of your arousal as he can manage until your hips finally drop back into the bed in post-climax exhaustion. on the contrary, the only reason he stops lapping at you is because you tug him away by the hair, bringing him up to you and between your legs again before he can do anything about it.

he splutters with a moan at the sudden contact of your wetness against his cock again, eyes fluttering shut and allowing you to bring him in, arms and legs winding securely around him so that you're flush against each other, hips rocking in tandem. jungkook is so caught up in the feeling - not the sex but the safety of being held, being connected like this - that you're the one to reach down and position his tip against your hot center, before finally running your hands down your husband's back to cup his ass and shove him into you.

jungkook gasps, breath shaking at how tight you are. you're so hot, so snug around him his eyes shut upon instinct, letting your hands guide his hips and showing him how to move in that perfect rolling motion that you're only familiar with after years of practice. and jungkook, of course, is a fast learner. it doesn't take long for him to take the reigns and fuck you just how you like it, adding in a sharp snap of his hips every now and again just to listen to you squeak in surprise. the wet sounds of your joined arousal coupled with you moaning under him is near cathartic, sending him hurtling to his finish line.

but before he can get there you shift him over, thick thighs helping you roll and pin him under you on the bed. jungkook grapples at your waist when you resume a slower but harder rock of your hips that has his length grinding against your clenching walls, his head thrown back at the intensity of it. you ride him through it, peppering the moles on his pretty neck with kisses and sucks, mouth finding his stiff little nipple to give it a swirl too. it's exactly what he needs to finish off, fingers digging into your flesh as he bucks wildly, filling you full of his seed while he calls your name. you slow to a stop when his hands finally fall limp on your thighs, his chest heaving under you and covered in sweat. you giggle. he always got so sweaty.

"you did so well, kookie," you whisper, kissing his damp neck and collar bones. his arms are suddenly around you again for comfort. "you were so good for me...always so good to me..."

"you," he croaks finally, eyes half lidded and a little delirious. "you didn't finish?"

you giggle at his genuine concern, pecking his wet lips. "i got mine, remember?"

"how many times?" jungkook is suddenly alert, tugging your wrist to get your attention before you can climb off him. his other hand is still around your middle so moving was out of the question until he allowed it. he was still inside you. "how many times do i usually make you come?"

you blink in embarrassment. you never really thought about it, let alone counted. "um...i don't know..." he waits for an answer, awfully serious about it. "a-at least two or three, i guess."

you yelp when he flips you back over, fingers immediately prying your cum soaked folds apart to nestle inside. "then don't act like we're done."

[arctrooper69]

HIS SHOES: A Mass Effect Fic

Warnings: blood, violence, war

My father was dead. It didn't feel right to put on his uniform, but I knew I had to. It was the only way to survive, and I knew he'd want me to survive. I scrambled to put them on as best as I knew how although the pieces didn't fit right. The chest piece was too tall, too wide, and when I took a step I clattered to the ground as my knees hit the shin guards much below where they would have fit if he'd been wearing them. But he wasn't. Screams filled the compound around me. I hugged the chest plate and leg armor to my chest on the ground in the corner. The air smelled of ozone and smoke. My stomach lurched and threatened to empty its contents all over the floor. Gunfire came in bursts and the walls flickered blue with bionic charges, gripping my insides and twisting them around. I could be like him - fearless - but then why hadn't I moved? With every quick breath I took, tears leaked from the corners of my eyes and I hastily wiped them away with the back of my hand, no doubt leaving smudges of ash and dirt behind. No. I would not cry. Not when there were people who needed me. I looked up from the ground at the alien creature lying dead in the middle of the room. My father's rifle lay where I had dropped it, on the floor several feet away. I did throw up then. Stomach acid burned the back of my throat and my stomach lurched again. I hadn't killed it on purpose. It just...happened. It was going to kill me and I fired. It dropped dead on the spot with a sickening splatter of blood. I looked away again, what would he say if he could see me now? His own son, cowering before the dead. I spit and wiped my mouth again. Taking a deep breath, I pulled myself to my feet still holding onto the armored uniform. A bold, red and white N7 logo emblazoned on each piece. The gun shots echoed, blasting through the compound and the walls shook with the groans of heavy machinery. My throat threatened to close up on me and my chest felt as though a thousand bricks had been placed there. Footsteps at the door. The air in my lungs was gone and my back hit the wall of the corner I'd been hiding in. I could barely reach the rifle but I hooked the strap onto my foot and pulled it toward me. I couldn't feel my hands, but they worked as they did before holding the gun in my arms. The footsteps entered the doorway and stopped. "Spirits..." the voice muttered somewhat low and gravelly. He grunted as he stepped toward the body on the ground. I couldn't stay still any longer. With a yell I rushed out at him firing the gun. It happened too fast and suddenly I was on the ground again, panting. "Easy there, son." He took the rifle from my hands and called out over his shoulder out the door, "I found him! Shepherd's boy. I found 'im". A tall blue turian looked down at me. Suddenly I couldn't hide the tears. They came faster than I could wipe them away. The turian stood there a moment, watching me. I looked away, ashamed. I was weak and now even my savior knew it. Movement caught my eye and I glanced up. His hand was extended toward me. "Come on, kid. We gotta go." I cautiously took his hand and he pulled me to my feet. "You knew my dad?" He didn't answer. He wasn't looking at me. He gazed sadly at the armor I'd been holding and slowly picked up the pieces. He looked down at me still holding onto his hand. "You'll fit into this someday, kid. You will, I guarantee it"

[vickyskpopkingdom]

Baekhyun :: working blues

request: Hii! Im rlly into baekhyun's new album rn and i was hoping u could write a fluff where ur just having a rough day and he sings u to sleep pls!! Rlly like ur fluff writes btw 💕💕

thank you so much for your kind words! i haven't written about exo in a long, long time but i hope that you still like what i came up with!

warnings: overworking, stress

1.8k words, gn reader

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Sometimes you felt like the world was collapsing on you. The weight on your shoulders got too heavy at times and you were just tired. So tired, so tired. Today was one of those days.

The work you had to do didn't seem to end. At this point you couldn't even count how many e-mails you had answered, how many texts you have read, how many calls you made and how many words you have written. Your eyes were so tired they started to water at the sight of the bright screen of your laptop in front of you. When had it become so dark around you? Hasn't it been noon just a few minutes ago?

A quick glance through your bedroom window and towards the clock on your wall told you something different. It was already eight p.m., the streetlamp outside your window was the only source of light right now other than your laptop. With a sigh you leaned back into your chair and tried stretching your arms as well as your neck and legs. Every joint in your body seemed to make a protesting cracking noise and as you tried to massage your neck, your muscles burned with protest.

You sighed again. Maybe you really should invest in one of those fancy office chairs that claimed to be a blessing for your whole body. At the thought of the price however you shook that thought out of your head.

Standing up you got through another round of stretching your whole body and decided to check out the kitchen for food. It only hit you as the dim light of the fridge illuminated your face that you were supposed to go grocery shopping today. Empty shelves greeted you back and your stomach grumbled angrily.

You tried hard not to scream out of frustation. Nothing wanted to work your way these days and you were honestly so tired of it. For some time you were able to tell yourself that everything would work out and that you would find your working blues again but that was yet to happen. Quietly you closed the fridge door again, sliding down against it to the floor.

The project you had been assigned at the start of last week was way more complicated than you had anticipated, the sources you were thinking of using turned out to be a scam. Adding to that the promotion you had been so sure of getting had been given to someone else and while you could understand that they deserved it, you were sure that you would have deserved it as well. Not only was your fridge emtpty but you had been neglecting your healthy eating habits for quite some time now, which only frustated you more.

And today all of these things seemed to add up all at once, crushing you under their weight.

When was the last time you really had a good nights sleep? You had worked late and gotten up early, eating only bits and pieces of instant food, sitting at your desk all day and falling into bed only to repeat the same cycle over and over again. Right now you were fighting to keep the tears at bay but the merry-go-round in your head kept spinning, piling up more and more worries.

When was the last time you had seen your friends? When was the last time you even properly talked to them? You were always telling them that you were busy with work when they asked to hang out. They never pressured you to still come with them but you knew that they would love to see you again even for a few hours. Yet you still could not get yourself to take their invitations, the thought of your unfinished project sitting in the back of your head constantly.

When was the last time your boyfriend--?

Just as the tears started flowing down your face the doorbell rang. Its sound surprised you so much that you jumped up, your heart beating fast. The clock in your kitchen read nine p.m. One hour went by while you were staring holes in the walls and drowned in your thoughts.

You couldn't really think of a reason why someone would visit you this late, on a weekday nonetheless. But not answering the door wasn't an option either, you would just start to worry about 'what-ifs'. So you decided to take a peak through the peephole in your door.

Your heart picked up its pace at you saw a familiar face illuminated by the light of a smartphone-screen, lookin worried and confused. Fumbling with your keys you opened the door and the person looked up from their phone.

"Hey Bambi, are you okay?"

Baekhyuns voice filled your ears as soon as he looked into your face. He eyed you up and down, making sure you were alright. "I texted and tried to call you for at least two hours now. There was no reaction from you whatsoever."

As you allowed him to step into your home, you sighed. "Sorry, I threw my phone across the room at one point and didn't pick it up again."

Your boyfriend chuckled as he got rid of his shoes and coat, placing both neatly onto their usual spots in the entrance of your flat. Just the sight of him, doing everyday things, smiling, talking was an instant boost for your mood. Now that he was here you fully realized just how much you had missed his presence.

"Why would you throw your phone?", Baekhyun questioned.

You made a dismissive move with your hand, not wanting to talk about the infuriating call you had to make a few hours ago. "I was frustrated", you only said.

Together you and Baekhyun made your way towards your bedroom. Just as you stepped into the room and turned on the lights you remembered the state you left your working place in. But it was too late to make him turn around now. Quickly you tried to tidy up the place a little bit, hiding the traces of your overworking as Baekhyun cleared his throat to gain your attention.

"Are you drowning yourself in work again?"

You stopped dead in your tracks. This wasn't the first time he had seen you piling up work on your shoulders and ending up being unable to do anything else. Back then you had promised him to take better care of yourself or at least take real breaks once in a while to catch a breath.

"Maybe...."

Now it was Baekhyuns turn to sigh. "Did you eat today? And before you answer i mean 'eat a proper meal'."

Picking up your phone from the floor you sat yourself down on the bed. "No, not really. It's just this project..."

Baekhyun shook his head at you, but you still noticed the small smile on his face. "You are such a hard-working person. But you need to allow yourself some time to breathe, you know?"

His voice was calm, sounding like music to your ears. Even after all this time you had been in a relationship with him you were still surprised by how easily he could make you relax.

"Yes, I know."

"And since I am such a caring and awesome boyfriend", he said, rustling with a plastic bag you only now noticed in his hands, "I brought you some food."

As you looked into his smiling face you couldn't help but ask yourself how you got so lucky.

The meal was good, it was your favorite and having Baekhyun by your side made you feel even more grounded. It almost felt like you gained new energy after a week of complete exhaustion and constant worrying. While you were eating the both of you talked about everything and nothing, catching up, telling stories and sharing your newest netflix suggestions.

The evening proceeded and your eyes landed on the clock again. It was late, if you were still caught up in your workaholic-lifestyle you would have already been asleep right now. However surprisingly you currently were not even close to worrying about getting up the next morning. What bothered you most right now was that this evening would end and eventually you would have to go to sleep an wake up in the morning, getting back to your work.

Baekhyun seemed to notice the frown on your face sooner than you could hide it again. "What's wrong?"

You shrugged. "This is nice, simply being together with you. But you probably have to leave soon and then tomorrow I have to work on this stupid project again."

"I can stay the night, if you want me to of course."

"I didn't want to pressure you into--"

"You didn't", he interrupted you, before you could end the sentence and feel like you made him stay against his will, "I actually wanted to ask if I could stay anyways. Tomorrow is one of my free days. I could even keep you company while you work."

Your chest felt warm at his words. "I would love that."

Soon you two found yourselves back in your bed, bodies entangled with each other, quiet breaths sounding through the room. You could feel your eyelids growing heavy, but as soon as you closed your eyes all you could think of was the next morning, the project, the unanswered emails, the calls.

"Still can't calm down, Bambi?", Baekhyun whispered in your ear, while slowly stroking your hair.

With closed eyes you shook your head. "I can't take my mind off of work."

The next thing you heard was quiet humming coming from Baekhyun. You could feel the vibration of his vocal chords against your own body. His voice really was a blessing for everyones ears, he could carry emotions through singing that you weren't even able to put into words. His songs made you happy, they made you cry occasionally, they made you feel calm or made you miss something you didn't even knew existed. It was a gift.

His humming transformed into words, calmly sang into the otherwise dark and quiet room.

It's a night filled with a single stream of light

You're my timely rain, Bambi

I don't want to waste even a second of this night just

being the two of us

As you listened to his singing, you could finally feel your muscles relaxing, your brain calming down and your whole body drifting towards sleep. There were no worrysome thoughts turning your mind upside down anymore, there was only Baekhyun and his voice filling your head with images of your favorite places, your favorite memories and him. The warmth of his body under the blankets made you feel safe, at home. This was were you belonged.

And while Baekhyun continued with the song you fell into a deep sleep, one that you deserved after all the work you had done. You already knew that you found your blues again. Everything would work out again, just like you had always thought yourself. And all you had needed was just a small push in the right direction from the right person.

I don't want to wake up from this dream, keep this tempo

I hope the sun doesn't rise while I keep my eyes closed

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I really hope you enjoyed this one! It was nice to write something again but I do feel like i am a little bit out of training i guess haha

and also if you feel like the reader in this scenario, please remember that there will be better days & that life is more than working day to day! take a break, make some tea, get some fresh air and get back to your work with a fresh mind; you can do it!!

[morizoras-cave]

Big Smile (Request)

Tom Hiddleston x Teen!Co-star!Reader

Genre: Angst, fluff

Request Description: maybe some Tom Hiddleston who is close to reader cause hes like her mentor and shes a very happy person, goofy and silly as well but nothing can make her cry. Like, it's genuinely hard to make her cry so maybe him seeing her cry for the first time? and it's pretty bad? maybe its cause she goes to a normal high school along with a catch up high school (basically a school where u go to if youre SERIOUSLY behind) and the pressure is way too much for her to handle and her emotions exploded? ty!!

Warnings: depression, anxiety about school, stress

(A/N): im very excited to be going on vacation!! dont worry ill still update, im just going to another city nothing too big (of course with the ‘rona still out here). I wrote like half of this on my phone btw so if anything looks weird that’s why

“Why would you say it like that?” you laughed loudly, falling back on your bed. Tom giggled too, watching as you got into a laughing fit.

“I’m just demonstrating that you can say each line differently!” he defended, but your laughter didn’t falter. Tom smiled and shook his head, waiting for you to be done. “Can you hurry that up, we have a couple more lines to go through,” he joked.

You held your stomach and shook your head. Finally, the laughter died down and you tried desperately not to start it again, as Tom continued helping you with the script. You forced your mouth into a frown, but that only reinforced your need to laugh. 

Tom looked and saw your expression and sighed, making you laugh again. 

“This is impossible,” he muttered, but he was smiling. He thought you were so incredibly sweet and bright, although lacking a little seriousness. 

“Hey, it’s okay,” you finally stopped laughing AGAIN, “we’re done. Those were all the lines I had questions about.”

“You sure?” 

“Yeah,” you said and both of you stood up. Tom grabbed his jacket and his bag from the counter of your hotel room. He smiled at you and hugged you as a farewell. 

“See you on set tomorrow,” and then he was out of your room. You smiled softly thinking about how much fun you two had, but the sweet moment was over far too fast. 

You had school. You’d never been a top student or anything, but before this whole movie-thing you’d been able to keep up. A couple of weeks ago you started Catch-Up-High-School, which you’d been required to start, since you grades had all dropped. 

And since then you’d felt awful. You felt so stupid and useless. And on top of that, you were stressed. With both regular high school teachings and catch up school, you seemed to spend every waking moment working, either on the movie or on school, and you’d only sleep once you were done. Which could take a while. 

It was getting to you. You were phenomenal at hiding it, truthfully. Because your personality was too bright and blinding for anyone to see anything behind it. 

You weren’t one to cry, but you felt it behind your eyes, constantly. All day, when you remembered your school situation, it started coming. You never cried, not when watching movies or reading books, you didn’t even really cry when you were sad. The stress was simply getting to you. 

You pulled out both your math books, both regular high school and catch up high school, which you had neatly tucked away when Tom came, and started doing your assignments for the day. 

Your head hurt, as you did it, and it was so hard for you to understand. You wished you could ask Tom for help, but you couldn’t tell him. It was simply too embarrassing. ‘Hey Tom, I’m too stupid for regular school, please help?’ What would he even think of you?

You hadn’t even done your assignments for long, when you started crying. You were just writing the answer to a question, when a tear slid down your face. You wiped it away as quick as it came and continued. 

But so did your tears. You cried silently as you worked, ignoring them, eventually not even wiping them away. You were just trying to get through it, chewing through your lip. 

Just as you failed to figure an assignment out, your pencil broke on the paper, and you threw it away from your, putting your head in your hands. Then you sobbed, and you weren’t trying to ignore it, you were doing it. You were sitting there, and all of your focus was on the seemingly never ending stream of tears from your eyes. 

God, what kind of person are you if you can’t even do your catch up school work? You felt so unbelievably heavy, heart wrenching and tingling. 

Meanwhile Tom had hauled down a cab, making it about a third of the way to his meeting, when he realized he’d left his phone at your place. He sighed and asked the driver to drive back to your hotel, knowing he’d need it.

Tom drove back there, and then stepped out of the cab, telling the driver to wait for him. He entered and pulled out his keycard. Your room had had two keycards and you’d given him your second one, which had made his heart melt. 

He walked down the corridor, reading the room numbers, and then reached your door. He grabbed the handle and scanned the keycard, effectively cracking open the door.

And there you were. Tom blinked rapidly, refusing to believe that that was you, so immersed in your own crying that you hadn’t heard him come in. That couldn’t be you, not the smiling, laughing, happy Y/n he knew. You were sitting there so dark and alone, hugging your legs and wailing. 

You never cried. Never. It had gotten to the point where him and his coworkers had discussed it, whether you were some robot or something. But you were crying. You were alone. 

“Y/n?”

His voice made you flinch and you didn’t have to look at him, to know you’d exposed yourself. You, although knowing it was useless, wiped your tears, before raising your head.

Tom was heartbroken. He’d never thought about how he’d actually feel once he finally did see you cry. But it was such a gut wrenching image, something he could feel in both his stomach and heart and throat.

“What’s going on?” He asked. You shook your head. He simply stepped inside and saw your regular high school math book, immediately knowing you were probably stressed. “Do you need help with your homework?”

You laughed bitterly, another tear sliding down your cheek. Tom walked to you, sitting down next to you, so he could wipe away the tear.

“What’s wrong? Come on, talk to me.. What happened?” He searches your eyes.

“I’m just stressed, Tom, it’s stupid,” you avoided his gaze. Tom knew it wasn’t stupid. If it was you wouldn’t be balling your eyes out.

“So, let me help you with it,” He heard how his voice was shaking.

“Tom, no.”

“Yes-“

“No!”

Silence. Tom pulled away from you. He was simply shocked. You weren’t you. He closed his eyes.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, voice breaking, as you started crying again. When you yelled at Tom, you felt your heart withering. What a horrible feeling.

“I’m sorry for yelling. It’s just- I feel so useless. All the time. I’m failing school! I mean, for God’s sake, I have mandatory catch-up-school. Do you know how embarrassing that is? God, how can I be so stupid?”

Tom finally understood why you were crying. Why you were so stressed, why you were crying like that.

It was tough.

“You’re not stupid, Y/n,” you immediately shook your head at his attempt to console you, “You’re not! I’m serious. You’re smarts come from your understanding of people, and your talents in acting and everything you love. Not from your schoolwork. Your grades are not your worth. You’re the smartest kid I’ve ever met! I mean it.”

Your crying turned to sniffles and you finally nodded. You agreed. You hadn’t felt so sure of yourself in a long time. A small smile found your lips.

“Thank you, Tom, I-I really needed that.”

“Oh, of course, N/n,” he mumbled and pulled you into a hug, burying your head in his chest. You wrapped your arms around him.

“Now my offer still stands. Do you want my help doing the homework?” This time you nodded, and the two of you spent the rest of the day doing all of your homework.

When you were finished, you apologised profusely, but Tom just smiled and said he’d do it any day. Every day onward while you were working on that movie, he’d ask you after shooting if you needed any help, and always insisted it was his pleasure. With Tom around, you never had to feel useless again.