#my special interest from when I was 8-12 is back please I beg

[theacedragon]

I could do hour+ long presentations on every aspect of this movie

[badbatchsprincess]

Heated ~ pt.25

Pt.1 ~ Pt.2 ~ Pt.3 ~ Pt.4 ~ Pt.5 ~ Pt.6 ~ Pt.7 ~ Pt.8 ~ Pt.9 ~ Pt.10 ~Pt.11 ~ Pt.12 ~ Pt.13 ~ Pt.14 ~ Pt.15 ~ Pt.16 ~ Pt.17 ~ Pt.18 ~ Pt.19 ~ Pt.20 ~ Pt.21 ~ Pt.22 ~ Pt.23 ~ Pt.24 ~ Pt.25

Masterlist

Summary: This is an ABO Bad batch!Poly x Omega Reader smut with a plot. This takes place as an AU before order 66. Y/N previously served under the 501st before being transferred to Special Forces 99. This is her adventure with these rowdy Alphas in a quickly changing universe.

THIS IS AN ABO AU ABOUT THE BAD BATCH (NO CANON OMEGA!) Due to the unfortunate situation of her name being Omega… Omega the child from the canon series is not going to be apart of this fanfic/porn with a plot. I feel obligated to put this warning in because it makes my skin crawl thinking anyone could make that mistake. 

Warnings: literally 11.6k of smut. #imnotsorry Dom!Crosshair, Dom!Tech, Soft!Hunter, Dom!Hunter, Soft!Wrecker, mating rituals, about dynamics, smut smut smut, and more smut, actually filth, I need to go to repent, biting, mentions of blood, aftercare is important...Anal.... hehe.

Announcement: I'm actually so sad to be writing this, but there's only going to be one more installation after this chapter. Ahhh it's been a ride, I started writing this halfway through season three and I miss the boys everyday. I just wanted to say that I'm so thankful for everyone and this community you guys all make my day everyday. I love interacting with you all and I appreciate it so much. I will be continuing to write so please submit anything your interested in my writing about (no matter for debauched) (no shame on my page bb) I'd love to get your requests for literally anything. Anyways, enjoy my friends and I can't wait to finish up pip's journey.

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Hunter held your hand as you two walked back inside the monastery. Your entire nervous system was beginning to finally settle, feeling his warm skin against your own. All you ever wanted was your alphas with you. You didn’t want to ever fight with Hunter ever again. 

When you made it back to the main hall, Tech and Wrecker were waiting eagerly where you left them, only to become even more excited at seeing you reconciling with Hunter. Wrecker practically threw the table aside to pick you up again and swing you around like his Lula.

You barked feeling him squish you and you vaguely heard Tech begging him to be gentle with you. When he set you down, Tech gently brought you into his chest pressing a soft kiss to your forehead as a silent apology for earlier. It was obvious they didn’t want to fight with you either. 

“Good to see you’re finally seeing things correctly.” Crosshair’s signature drawl made Hunter look up from where he stood.

Hunter scowled, “It was a lot to process all at once.” He couldn’t let his little brother challenge his ego. You had to stifle a giggle. 

Crosshair scoffed before smirking and looking down at you, “Told you.” 

You rolled your eyes playfully leaving the other three miffed. They had no clue as to what Crosshair was referring to. 

“Y/N! Can you come here and take a look at this?” Rex called to you from the center of the room. 

You trotted over to him settling to his left, “What’s up?” 

“We’ve been trying to make sense of this all night but we don’t know what it means.” Rex pulled up the hard drive from the holodisk. 

“It’s medical jargon and obviously that isn’t our speciality.” A Commander you didn’t recognize said from the other side of the table. He looked exhausted with sunken in eyes. His tattoos over his right eye was unfamiliar to you. 

Hunter’s voice cut in, “Well you’re in luck, Pip graduated top of her class from the Coruscant school of medicine.” 

You nodded feeling a little flushed at his nonchalant bragging. 

You took over the controls from Rex and started reading through the reports. 

The further you read, the more your eyes widened and your heart began to race from excitement. 

“What is it, Y/N?” Wrecker asked noting the way your body language changed suddenly.

You shook your head, “I can’t believe it…” 

Everyone stared at you. 

You looked up to face Rex and the other Commanders around the table, “Nala Se gave me the instructions on how to reverse the accelerated aging in clones.” 

Wrecker’s jaw nearly hit the floor. 

Tech pushed up his goggles and looked over your shoulder, “You mean to tell us that there is a way to alter the genetic structure in fully developed clone specimens?” 

You nodded and tilted your head up to look at your alpha, “Yeah. With this, you all could live very long healthy lives just like the nat-borns.” 

Everyone took a healthy pause taking in this information. You continued reading through the research along with Nala Se’s personal notes. This was a step by step in altering their genome.

Rex then turned to look at you, “What do you need in order to do this?” 

Hunter stepped forwards with a hand raised, “Wait a minute, I promised my mate she’s out of the fight. Rex, I know this is important but she’s already been through too much. I need to take her away from all of this. I have to keep her safe from the empire.” 

You stood up on your tip toes, “Wait! I know what I said, but if you’re right about this green place, what if we set up the homestead there and I can work on the research and be safe. There’s no reason why Rex couldn’t come to check-in.” You looked to your alpha, “Please Hunter. I would give anything to make sure I can spend the rest of my natural lifespan with you all.” 

“Is she talking about the planet in the outer rim?” Rex asked. 

Hunter nodded. 

Tech then looked up from his data pad, “There is ample room on the unmarked planet. We can build her a laboratory for her to conduct her research, and any of the clones who wish to live with us most certainly can. We can’t possibly be the only ones wanting to escape this war now that we have an opportunity.” 

You heard a few clones in the background agree. You knew the ones mated on Naboo would be more inclined to keep their omegas safe in a secure location far from the empire’s reaches. 

“It sounds like a plan to me.” Rex agreed, “Tiny, what supplies do you need to complete something like this?”

You looked to Rex and then to Tech, “It’s going to start with a trip to Bracca…”

~

“Seven standard rotations.” Rex confirmed setting his chronometer to align with Tech’s. 

“I will send you the coordinates in a scrambled hex code once we arrive. We will be awaiting the supply vessels.” Tech looked to Rex,  “And due take the time to ensure everything on that list is onboard, we will be needing construction droids if we wish to build a larger scale community assuming you’ll be bringing the refugees.” Tech rattled on about the list you had drawn up. 

You tightened the jacket on one of your old uniforms as the boys loaded up the Marauder with all the supplies you’d need for the week on this new unmarked plant before Rex would be arriving. 

According to Hunter it rained often there, so you made sure your GAR issued uniforms were up to par for the weather ahead.

You counted the medical supplies along with enough rations to keep you all fed. 

Crosshair handed you a gun along with the side holster they had made for you all those moons ago. You slid into the leather straps and secured the belt around your waist. 

“How many rotations until we get to the coordinates?” You asked Hunter. 

“Two.” He kissed your cheek before grabbing another box of supplies. 

“Gonk! Gonk!” 

You squealed, “Gonky!” 

Wrecker carried the droid from the base’s charging port onboard making sure he was fully charged to keep you all comfortable on reserve energy for the next few days. 

You felt a tap on your shoulder and you spun around to be face to face with Commander Wolffe, “You better take care of those guys, alright little omega?” He smiled. 

You nodded dutifully, “You’re going to be coming too right?” 

He shrugged, “Unsure, I’ll meet you out there after the seven rotations to help get everything settled, but I think my fight might be with Rex. I can’t rest until I know all of our brothers are safe.” 

You nodded, “Well if that’s the case, can you do something special for me?” 

He raised a brow. 

“There’s a medic named Kix. Rex said he went missing before the end of the war. He was my only friend for a while during my first few days with the 501st. Can you please try to find him for me?” 

Wolffe nodded, “I’ll try my best.” 

“Thank you.” You smiled touching his shoulder. 

“You don’t get to leave without saying bye to us!” Bolt and Stunner came jogging over to tackle you with a hug. 

“Me too kid.” Grim walked up throwing himself on top making you giggle. 

“I thought you all were coming too!” 

“We are!” Stunner stood up, “But we gotta pick up all your things first!” 

“It’s only seven days!” 

Bolts shook his head, “Too long kid. We’re pack now!” 

“Huh?” You looked to Wolffe. 

He just closed his eyes and shook his head with a sigh, “Don’t even get me started.” 

“These two decided so.” Grim gestured to Bolts and Stunner, they smiled, “So naturally we all agreed.” 

You felt giddy, “Well thank you, and I look forward to seeing you all very soon.” 

They left you to make your way back to the Marauder to make your departure. 

As you crossed the landing platform, you saw Howzer speaking with some other soldiers. You felt your stomach drop slightly anticipating a disapproving glare, but you were surprised and relived to see him give you a friendly nod. You repeated the action watching his return to him conversation, leaving you climb the rest of the stairs to the Marauder and into your old quarters. 

Once inside you looked around suddenly feeling home. You breathed in the stinky air happy to feel something normal again. 

“The smell came back.” Echo groused. 

“I love it.” You sighed settling into your jump seat. 

He looked at you horrified but opted to ignore it while getting comfortable in the co-pilot seat. 

“I just finished crosscheck, we’re ready for takeoff.” Tech announced walking into the main galley. 

He placed a kiss on your cheek as he passed before finding his way into the pilot’s chair. 

Hunter pointed to the hatch, “Wrecker, shut the door and let’s get a move on.” 

Wrecker walked to the door hitting the locking mechanism. 

Crosshair came to sit next to you in the other jump seat, securing your harness before fixing his own. Once everyone was seated and secured, Tech began the take off sequence. You’ve never been more excited to hear the engines of the ship start up and that familiar rumble vibrate through the cabin. 

As the Marauder pulled away from the monastery, you watched the pink Teth skies turn into deep blackness as Tech flew you all through the planet’s atmosphere. 

“Almost at hyperspace cruising altitude.” He said steering the ship expertly to the hyperspace lanes. Once in place, he pushed the hyperspace lever sending the ship hurtling through the galaxy at high speed. 

You all jolted at the acceleration before the ship leveled out and you were cruising smoothly through empty space. 

You were giddy. For the past few hours the only thing you could think of was the green place. You hoped it was lush like Kaashyykk. 

Your daydreams were taking over you didn’t even register that Hunter was talking to you. 

“Mesh’la.” He said getting your attention. 

You looked up with wide eyes. 

Echo suddenly stood up, “I’m sure you all have a lot to catch up on,” grabbing a ration pack he headed for the back of the ship, “I gotta check something in the hyperdrive.” 

You watched him leave before turning back to your alphas with a questioning look. 

“Hunter asked what you were thinking about?” Crosshair repeated drawing little lines on your pant leg. You shivered as he teased his finger higher periodically. 

You were starting to feel something warm and low vibrating through the bond. 

You looked up to Hunter, “I was imagining what the green place looks like.” 

He smiled crossing his arms facing you. 

Wrecker cut in, “It’s beautiful Mesh’la, just like you!” 

“Awh, Wreck.” You smiled. 

“But thats not all that I, we, wanted to ask you.” Hunter looked to Tech. 

You looked at him with peaked interest. 

“We want to ask you how you feel about completing the bonds before we reach Zyphora.” Hunter said, his voice deepening. 

You felt the heat start to grow through the bonds, they were growing more turned on by the second. You too could feel your scent glands heating and radiating your pheromones through the air. 

“Y-You want to mate?” You stuttered feeling the heat in your cheeks and the hope rising in your chest.

Hunter smirked and tilted his head playfully. 

You noticed Wrecker’s sweet gaze and Tech’s heady eyes boring into you that sent a shiver down your entire body.

Crosshair interjected, “Right now?” 

Tech narrowed his eyes at his brother, “Problem?” 

Crosshair just looked at his twin, “It might be a little overstimulating for her having all three of you bite her.” He explained.

“Why is that?” Hunter challenged. That jealousy must be a genetic trait at this point.

Crosshair petted your knee, “She was so far into subspace when it happened.” He looked at you, “Just don’t bite her all at once.” 

Ever the protector. 

You looked back up at him questionably, “What’s subspace?” 

He smirked tugging at your lower lip with his thumb, “It means you’re so cock dumb you’re barely coherent.” 

Your face flushed immediately at his lewd wording. You heard Hunter chuckle darkly. 

Tech clarified, “That’s not the exact definition.” 

“She gets the point.” He wet his lip looking down at yours still under his thumb. 

“Is that alright with you Mesh’la?” Hunter softened his eyes getting your attention back on him, “Are you ready for that?” 

You took a deep breath trying to still your now racing heart, “Are you?” You could feel the wetness starting to gather in your panties. The heat uin the bond was starting to become unbearable, the simmering turning to boiling.

He chuckled, “You’re the only one for us ad’ika.” 

They nodded in agreement. 

You nodded too, “Then yes. I’m ready to be mated, Hunter.” 

You wish you had a recording of the look Hunter gave you. The adoration in his grey eyes made your insides flutter. 

“Aw yeah!” Wrecker flew up from his seat to pick you up and throw you over his shoulder bouncing you a few times making you squeal. 

“Okay, Wrek easy with her.” Hunter chastised standing up. 

Crosshair stood plucking the toothpick from his mouth and pointed it at his three brothers, “So how does this work. If one of you looses it, and tries to overwhelm her with a bite, I’m stunning you.” 

Tech stepped forwards, “I have a plan but we all have to agree.” 

Everyone looked to the analyst, “We go in age order, just like we agreed to months ago. We haven’t all been together since Mimban, so we’ll have to remember to stay in control if this is to work. We’ll give pip enough time to recover in between so she’s not overwhelmed.” He looked to Crosshair to make sure he was in approval. Crosshair gave him a pensive nod.  

“So then, Hunter first?” Wrecker asked squeezing your ass. You used your hands to perch yourself up on Wrecker’s shoulder blades to look at the others. 

Crosshair still looked a little hesitant and unsure. 

Hunter looked to his little brother, “Don’t worry Cross, we’ll be sweet with her.” He looked to you with a devilish smirk, “Right mesh’la?”

You fought back the whimper that threatened to escape your throat, but you couldn’t fight the pulsing in your core that nearly crumbled your resolve. Wrecker seemed to pick up on it and massaged the backs of your thighs making you even weaker under his strong hands. 

“Alright, since everything is settled.” Tech gestured for Wrecker to set you down. He gave your ass a loud spank before setting you down on the ship’s durasteel floor. 

You stood on wobbly feet letting Hunter steady you while Crosshair and Wrecker disappeared into the bunk to set up the mattresses again.

“C’mon Mesh’la.” Hunter placed his firm hands on your shoulders steering you into your old bunk. 

When the doors slid open to find the mattresses all pushed against one another just like on Mimban, you shuddered at the memory of all of their hands on you and the feeling of being knotted over and over for days on end and the delicious delirium that accompanies those memories. 

Crosshair coughed feeling the heat in his own face. He looked up at you with a playful look making you hide your own smile. He definitely saw that one through the bond.

Hunter spun you around to press a sudden kiss to your lips knocking the wind out of you. Then it was like something snapped inside you. The scents of all of your alphas in one location again was making you absolutely feral with need.

Without breaking the kiss, you started to scramble to remove Hunter’s armor, “Off,” You mumbled into his mouth reading for his shoulder latches to unclip the chest plates. 

“Someone’s eager.” Crosshair chuckled starting to remove his shirt and tossed it to the side before plopping down on the mattress to watch as his other brother started stripping. The sniper placed his blaster to the side with the switch set to stun just incase. 

Piece after piece began to fall to the ground in disgruntled piles as you continues to make out with Hunter practically tearing his clothing off. As much as you loved that teal henley you wanted to tear the offending thing to shreds.

Tech dimmed the lights inside the bunk as you pulled on his shirt revealing Hunter’s beautiful tanned and tattooed chest. You broke away to admire your sergeant as he pulled the fabric the rest of the way over his head before tossing into the pile with Crosshair’s. You audibly sighed before launching forwards to run your hands greedily over his entire smooth chest feeling every ridge of sinew muscle. 

Hunter started on his burgundy wrist wraps removing the material seductively slow, while your hands traveled south to start working on his leather holsters. 

“You all wear too much clothing.” You growled unclasping the weapons and letting them fall to the ground. 

They all chuckled at that knowing you were telling the truth. 

Then you attacked the closure of his pants. You remembered buying him these pants on Ord Mantell. You bought them because they made his ass look fantastic. You pulled the khaki colored fabric down revealing his black under clothes and the hardened length begging to be freed. 

You didn’t hesitate yanking them down to reveal his rock hard cock making both of you groan as you firmly grasped him and began pumping slowly to relieve the pressure you knew he must have been feeling. 

Then you felt hands on your back making their way down to your waist and you knew it was Tech from the feel of his fingers. 

First he peeled off your jacket forcing you to release Hunter making you whine as Hunter then moved to dispose of the remaining pants and boots situation. 

“I get to warm you up, little one.” Tech whispered in your ear making you shudder. 

He pulled at your shirt throwing it into the pile before he saddled up behind you and began removing your holster and pants too. His sensual hands traveled down your thigh and belly to release the clasp holding the leather around your leg before slipping the rest of the material from your waist. 

The other hand undid your pant button before pulling down the zipper frustratingly slow. Then his lithe fingers slid underneath the waist hand of your panties tracing small lines into your skin but not hitting the spot you really wanted him to go. Such a tease.

You squirmed into him, feeling the hardness of his cock underneath his boxers as well. 

Tech then used his hands to yank down your pants while Hunter pulled off your boots one by one. Together hey liberated you from the rest of your clothes except your little panties. 

Crosshair gave a satisfied groan as he settled into the mattress having to readjust his own cargos to be more comfortable, “Take it off Tech!” He drawled from the side. 

Your hands went behind you to rest against Tech’s thighs as his hands went to the thin waist band of the barely there material. 

You looked up to see Hunter’s hungry stare along with Wrecker’s, watching you from the center of the room. 

You struggled to breathe as Tech’s skilled fingers looped inside the band teasing everyone slightly by tugging on it playfully. 

“Tech!” You whined feeling the material teasing your frustrated clit making you pant. 

“Rip it off.” Hunter ordered with a husky voice that made you drip between your thighs. 

Tech leaned forwards and bent down to nuzzle your ear, “Yes, sarge.” 

In a flash, your panties were snapped in two as the offending material remained in Tech’s hands, “For Cross.” He tossed them at his twin who happily snatched them out of the air to keep with a sexy smile. 

Kark.

That kriffing panty snatcher.

You felt like you were going to faint if someone didn’t make you come soon. 

“Go to your alpha.” Tech smacked your butt, urging you forwards. 

You scrambled forwards not trusting your legs to hold you up as you practically threw yourself at Hunter. He happily brought you into his arms straddling you over his thin waist. 

He snaked his fingers through your hair and gripped the base tilting your head up for him to kiss again as you felt Tech settle in behind you pressing his sturdy weight onto your ass. 

“And I thought we’d need the lube.” Tech ran a finger up your folds making you squeal into Hunter’s mouth, “But our little omega is already soaked.” He settled into rubbing your clit which had you arching your back deeper into Hunter’s chest. 

“Fuck.” Crosshair bit out flopping onto his back with his arm thrown over his eyes. 

You all turned to look at him as he seemed to be feeling what you were feeling through the mate bond. 

“Interesting.” Tech said experimenting with various pressures to see the way you and Crosshair mirrored each other. 

“He can feel that through their mate bond?” Wrecker asked 

“It would appear so.” Tech analyzed while slipping a finger inside your sloppy hole making Crosshair thrust into the air. 

You mewled pushing your hips back into Tech while scooting backwards just enough to reach for Hunter’s boxers. You pulled down his waist band and leaned forwards to lick his tip making him buck and lean back to give you room. You worked down the fabric just a bit further so you could wrap your lips around his length before sinking down on him taking him inside your waiting mouth. 

“Fuck ‘mega.” Hunter growled fisting your hair to guide you along his length. 

Tech continued his ministrations adding a second finger before adding a third. 

“Good girl.” He began scissoring his fingers to open you up. 

You bobbed your head against Hunter taking him as deep as you could possibly go without choking. 

“Atta girl.” He praised rubbing your cheek feeling himself inside your mouth. You fluttered around Tech making the pilot scoff, “She likes that.” 

“Likes what?” Hunter asked with a teasing smirk and a head tilt. 

“A praise from her Sarge.” Crosshair gruffed trying to keep himself under control despite feeling your pleasure radiating through your shared bond. 

You squeezed Tech’s fingers again as he pulled out to your dismay. 

You and Crosshair took a deep breath feeling the pleasure dissipate and your bodies calm once again. You kept Hunter in your mouth until he decided he couldn’t wait any longer to claim you despite how good your heavenly mouth feels on him. 

Sitting up, Hunter pulled your greedy mouth away from his length before shifting you both around, until he had you pinned beneath him. You whined craving something in your mouth while Hunter spread your legs. 

Crosshair grumbled, “She wants your cock in her mouth.”

You looked at him shocked that he would know that. He just looked smug in return. The damn bond…

“Later, omega.” Hunter replied grabbing your chin and redirecting you to look at him, “Promised I’d be sweet with you, little one…You ready Mesh’la?” He asked lining himself up with your swollen and clenching core. 

“Yes alpha.” You nodded eagerly making him smile. 

He surged forwards slowly entering you with a slight stretch. Hunter was thick and you cried out as he bottomed out inside you. He bent forwards until he was leaning over you on his elbows caging you in under his firm muscular body, totally encircling you with his warmth. 

“Gonna make you mine ‘mega.” He grumbled into your skin.

You clung onto his biceps as he began a slow a gentle pace getting you warmed up to being fucked faster. 

You cried out feeling him drag along your needy walls feeling every ridge and bump of him as he started to pick up the pace. 

When he felt your cunt relax and finally adjust to his size, he sat up placing a hand on your belly as he thrusted quicker. You bounced on his cock and reached up to run your hands over his abs and tattoo loving the way his muscles flexed in order to fuck you. Hunter was so hot it made your mind turn to mush.

You loved his possessive hand on your belly, you could feel him rubbing even more intently inside you as he applied that delicious pressure.

Your cries and moans filled the room as the two of you brought one another true pleasure… but something was missing. 

You cracked your eyes open to see the way Crosshair leaned against the wall stroking himself trying to breathe through the sensations he was receiving. He locked eyes with you feeling your desires morph into something darker. 

Then you looked to Tech who leaned a shoulder against the wall next to Crosshair. He watched you with hawk eyes behind his goggles showing off his height and sinew muscles. 

You clenched around Hunter clawing at his abdomen making his growl and lean forwards to tend to you. You stuck out your neck and mewled just like you did with Crosshair trying to tempt him into biting you. The omega in you was beginning to beg to be claimed. You were starting to need it more than oxygen. You wanted Hunter to take you. Make true on his promise, and claim you. Make you his. 

He nuzzled the spot where he planned to sink his teeth in, teasing you. You whined and wrapped your arms around his neck to claw at his back trying to portray your desperation for him. 

“Please alpha!” You whimpered pushing your neck into his mouth.

He ignored you and continued to thrust rocking the two of you closer to completion, but you wanted more… You needed the hunter… The wildness only Hunter could channel. 

A new rebellious streak you didn’t entirely recognize with Hunter seemed to itching its way up your neck. 

Bratting was only something you did with Crosshair and Tech, but you couldn’t seem to help yourself. 

You huffed locking your legs around his waist to urge him to be rougher with you, but it wasn’t working. He was too responsible and he had promised Crosshair to be gentle… kark. 

You looked to Crosshair who shot you a challenging look. He raised a brow almost daring you to do something bad. 

You looked back to Hunter forcing him to look down at you. You brought your hand up to his cheek looking deeply into his eyes with affection. They were soft and full of love, but you ached to see that darker side of him you hadn’t seen since Mimban. 

It was becoming a need not a want. You wanted him to let go of his control. 

With a devilish smirk on your lip, he looked down at you almost confused, before the hand on his cheek went to his neck and you roughly flipped the two of you over with a thump. 

You pinned him by his neck before you started riding him with no abandon. Leaning down, you snagged his mating gland between your fangs making him snap at your attempt at dominating him. 

With a snarl, he ripped you off of him and threw you to the side before he flipped you onto your stomach where he barely pulled up your ass to mount you again. You felt the air press out of you from his weight and the slide of his cock punching inside you again. 

“Alpha!” You cried out taking his brutal thrusts with a satisfied shit eating grin on your face. 

“What a bad girl.” Crosshair chided with a smirk. You looked up at him. 

He just smirked and looked to Hunter, “Poor Sarge was trying to be sweet with you little girl, and this is how you thank him?” 

Tech raised a brow and crossed his arms, “Look at her. Smiling and all after being so ungrateful.” 

“Brat.” Crosshair watched his eldest brother absolutely fuck you into the mattress. 

“Brat.” Tech repeated in confirmation. 

Kark. 

The look on their faces told you they were conspiring. You were karked. 

Hunter however, leaned down to fist your hair and wrench your head up almost painfully, “Is that right Mesh’la? You want me to be rough with you? Fuck you like a disobedient little whore?” 

“Fuck!” You moaned at his lewd words. You felt yourself get even more wet making the squelching sound take over the room as Hunter abused your cunt. 

“Seems like she likes being fucked like a whore.” Tech smirked pushing up his glasses.

“Ahh!” You held onto the sheets for dear life, but Hunter grabbed both of your wrists and locked them behind your back in his firm fist and pulled you up so you were ass up as he pounded into you at a ridiculously hard pace. The sound of his muscular thighs slapping against your own was making your brain short circuit. 

“Ahh! Hunter!” You cried into the mattress feeling the uncontrollable drool start to wet the mattress under your face as you bit the sheets. 

“Now I see why Crosshair mated you.” Hunter snarled into the back of your neck, “Just can’t control yourself can you?” 

“Please Hunter!” You begged, you could feel yourself nearing the precipice but you just needed that last little bit of stimulation to get you there. 

“Tell him what you want, omega.” Tech ordered. 

You whimpered before turning your head to look at Hunter from the corner of your eye, “Please touch me alpha, please!” 

“I don’t think she deserves to cum.” Crosshair crossed his arms now standing next to his twin. 

You whipped your head around to look at him with pleading eyes. 

“Please!” You cried out, “I’ll be good I promise! I’m sorry!” 

“You’ll behave for Tech and Wrecker?” Crosshair raised a skeptical brow. 

You nodded your head vigorously hoping they’d take mercy on you. 

“Fuck I can smell you getting wetter mesh’la.” Hunter growled out pushing his nose into your hair and inhaling your scent like a fucking animal. He reached down sliding his fingers between your thighs, finding your clit and rubbing small precise circles. Hunter nearly choked when you clamped down on his throbbing cock with a vice like grip.

“Swear you’ll behave little one.” Crosshair reminded you. 

“I swear!” You cried out rutting into Hunter’s touch. 

Crosshair hummed and you were lost in Hunter’s presence again. Back before the events on Mimban, you had often fantasized about Hunter chasing you down in the woods. It was one of your favorite little late night fantasies.  Letting him unleash his true wild side and have his way with you like a little prey animal caught in the predator’s jaws. It always made you cum on your fingers without much effort.

You could feel Hunter slip into his alpha side as he yanked you up further and kicked your knees apart forcing you to spread and arch for him even more. He put you into the most submissive position for an omega, making you nearly cum on the spot. Fuck he was rough when he wanted to be.

“Hunter!” You yelped as he used his free hand to push your neck down into the mattress and holding you there as he stroked you impossibly deep with his throbbing cock like he was trying to breed you. You were certain he was reaching your cervix making you squirm. 

He growled and bent forwards snagging your unmarked shoulder gland with his fangs before leaning forwards and sinking his teeth in making you both groan. When the skin broke and the alpha’s venom began to seep in, your entire body spasmed with an explosive orgasm before going entirely lax under Hunter as the bond snapped into place with a blinding fire sensation. It wasn’t the same as bring under the influence of the SRA, but damn, did it feel like heaven. You were certain your ears were ringing as your body thrummed.  

The sergeant collapsed on top of you, blood dripping down his chin, still throbbing inside you as he pumped his cum deep inside your walls. 

You both sagged into the mattress still connected together trying to find yourselves. You purred as he pulled you into his chest wrapping a protective arm around you. 

Crosshair smiled seeing his brother happy, and feeling the contentment of another piece of your soul righting it self between the two of you. 

Wrecker grabbed a nearby blanket and draped it over the two of you as you both returned from the bliss of post-mating. Hunter’s chest raised and lowered aggressively being sedated by his orgasm finally. His wildness, for now, had tampered down.

Tech knelt over you both grabbing his pen light to flash it into your eyes to check for responsiveness. When he was satisfied you were still conscious, just swimming in post fucking endorphins. He settled back with Crosshair waiting for you both to become coherent again. 

~

“I told you, it sends you to subspace.” Crosshair said watching Hunter come back first, blinking rapidly trying to understand the new sensations swirling inside him. Crosshair could feel the delirium, dulled, but still present in you. He watched you carefully curled into Hunter’s side trying to regain your normal breathing.

“It’s the alpha venom and mate bond.” Tech info dumped, “The chemicals Hunter released into her blood stream makes her docile. It’s an evolutionary response, so the omega is too tired to leave the alpha and the alpha is too tired to leave the seeded omega. It’s to ensure impregnation to further the species.” Tech nodded, “And to ensure she’s pregnant.” 

Crosshair looked at his twin wondering how in the hells he remembers all this stuff. 

You wriggled around making a cooing noise forcing Hunter to lean over to tend to you. He ran his fingers over your flushed cheek with a soft smile giving you soothing little pecks and touches.

“What’s she doing?” Wrecker asked watching you get fussy again under Hunter.

“She needs to complete the bond.” Tech said, “It’s her instincts making her restless.” 

Hunter heard his brother, and flopped onto his back pulling you on top of him. You straddled him and leaned forwards mouthing at the same place you teased him before. This time, he tilted his head to the side allowing you to have access to one of the most vulnerable parts on his person. You licked a stripe up the gland gathering his scent in your nose before pressing your incisors to the sun kissed skin and biting down harshly like a little rancor. 

You broke skin and he couldn’t help but yelp as you licked and sucked at the wound cooing quietly. He nearly had to pull you off, before he too felt a sense of utter exhaustion as the sensation spread through his overstimulated body. He cursed quietly settling into the blankets. 

“And that would be the omega venom making him too tired to leave the seeded omega.” Tech watched diligently, “Fascinating.”

You wriggled on top of Hunter softly grinding against his thick thigh as he rubbed your hip soothingly as you both came down from the mating high. 

“Ad’ika, how are you feeling?” Crosshair checked in with you. 

You sat up groggily looking at your other mate, “I’m feeling good Cross.” You smiled looking a little loopy. He could sense the endorphins in your system and looked to Tech, “I think she’s alright to continue.” 

“Good.” Tech bent down to the mattress and grabs your ankle to yank you down to him and off of his older brother. 

You squealed as you slid towards the other twin. 

Hunter just lay still feeling lethargic as the mating bond sealed in place in his body, taking over his entire nervous system momentarily. Crosshair watched him for a moment recognizing the feeling. Hunter groaned and covered his eyes with his forearm letting the sensations take over. 

“Because someone’s been very, very naughty.” Tech knelt down between your ruined legs spreading your legs to cage in his hips. You whined feeling his calloused hands make their way up your thighs, then your ribs, then finally one squeezed your tit while the other wrapped around your neck and she applied enough pressure to make you moan. 

You squirmed under your other alpha, enjoying Tech’s calculated roughness. 

“Egging Hunter on until he turned feral on you,” Tech clicked his tongue disapprovingly, “When he was trying to be so gentle with you.” 

You whimpered looking up at Tech. He ran a tongue over his left fang looking down at you with a hunger you had never seen before. You itched with greed to feel it pierce your skin again. 

With a moment of contemplation, he released you and sat up, “Present, omega.” 

Stunned, you stared up at him owlishly. He wants you to… present? You felt a rush of heat throughout your entire body. 

You whined baring your neck submitting to him, hoping he’d accept that…

But this was Tech, he just raised a brow and crossed his arms waiting for you to behave properly. 

You sat up and flipped over onto your hands and knees before lowing your head to the mattress showing off your cum covered pussy to him. You widened your knees and arched as prettily as possible hearing Crosshair let out a low whistle from the side. 

Wrecker groaned, “That was hot.” 

You felt your cheeks redden again the longer Tech took to move. You felt extremely exposed, but also extremely turned on.

 His silence was making you anxious as you tried your hardest to hold still for him. But you couldn’t hold back the anticipatory shakes that started to settle into your system begging for him to do something soon. You were about to beg for anything, even just a touch. You needed Tech in a way you had never needed him before. 

Never had you presented for an alpha… ever… The instincts in you told you to arch as far as possible to meet his approval, but that wasn’t necessary.  Tech finally reached forwards trailing a knuckle through your dripping entrance making you nearly spasm from sensitivity. 

He tutted behind you, before stroking your clit making you jump in his grasp, “I’m going to let Wrecker have his turn and you’re going to be very, very good for him omega.” He teased your hole with the tip of his finger making you bite your tongue, “Then you’re mine to have my way with, little one… Someone needs to teach you manners.” 

You swallowed nervously making Crosshair chuckle, “She understands.” 

“I thought it was your turn, Tech.” Hunter groaned sitting up on his elbows to find you bent over at his feet and he looked down the slope of your back.

“I want to take my time with her.” He stood up leaving you arched and alone on the mattress, “Go on, Wrecker.” 

You squeaked feeling his massive hands encapsulate you and pluck you up from the mattress before tossing you in front of him. You bounced a few times on the mattress before he rolled you onto your back positioning you how he wished.

You looked up at him with pleading eyes. 

“On your back, like a good little omega.” Crosshair sneered crossing his arms to face his twin. 

“Make Wrecker cum and we’ll lessen your punishment for being a brat.” Tech instructed. 

You nodded eagerly, not wanting to disappoint them. You were also a little terrified of the two of them being together again. The had edged you so many times on Mimabn you had broken down in tears when they finally let you cum. You really didn’t want to go through that again any time soon.

“Don’t worry ‘mega.” Wrecker smiled, “I’ll take care of you.” He must have sensed your trepidation. 

“I know, alpha.” You smiled grasping onto his massive biceps with a giddy smile. 

Tech snorted from the other side of the room. He really doubted that you could override your omega instincts and behave. When you looked up at them, you gasped. Tech turned to face Crosshair obviously discussing your punishment sending a shiver down your spine.

You felt Wrecker chuckling above you before he grabbed your left wrist. He brought it up between the two of you, “I’m going to mark you here ‘mega. Is that alright?” He thumbed your glad making you shiver with lust and effectively distracted you from his conniving brothers. 

You nodded, “Should I bite your left, or your right, alpha?” You asked watching his thumb slide against your skin, “Should we match?” 

“Yeah baby, Let’s match.” He smiled down at you. 

You shimmied under him trying to make his hips flushed with yours. His heavy cock swung back and forth between you before he settled it against your belly, hot and thick. You gasped seeing how far it would be inside you from this position, reaching your bellybutton, butterflies fluttered through your entire body realizing how much you’d have to stretch to take him. 

“Are you stretched enough, pip?” He asked rutting his thick cock through your slippery folds teasing you with little bits of stimulation. 

“Yes, alpha.” You answered sweetly. 

“Are you sure?” He looked down for a moment, “I don’t wanna hurt you.” 

You spread your legs as far as possible and brought your knees up and grabbed the back of your knees, “I promise, alpha.” 

“Atta girl.” He angles himself to push his fat tip to your dripping hole. He rubbed it back and forth gathering the remaining cum Hunter had pumped you full of before pushing forwards and filling you with his hot and thick cock. 

Hunter’s cum squelched out the sides as Wrecker filled you to the absolute brim. 

You cried out making the others turn to watch as Wrecker made a couple small experimental thrusts. 

You held onto him for dear life abandoning the grip on your knees to dig your nails into his arms as he stretched you to your limits. Fuck it has been a while since you’ve done this with him.

 He felt like a knot just like this, it made you shudder like a leaf beneath him. 

He reached down running his thumb between your legs to rub your clit slowly making your cries turn into sweet mewls as pleasure surged through you both. 

Both Hunter and Crosshair groaned feeling the bond and they watched you closely as Wrecker very carefully, fucked you to another orgasm. 

“Make him cum, Omega.” Crosshair tutted from the corner. 

You whined looking up at your two alphas for approval. The twins both cross-armed, mirroring one another, as they discussed you with straight faces.

You looked back to Wrecker who smiled down at you. His weight on top of you felt delicious. You ran your hands over your belly feeling him rocking inside of you before you trailed them up his sides and back. You traced over some of his old battle scars before reaching his neck. You tickled your nails over his mating gland making him twitch inside you with a shudder. 

“Fuck, pretty girl.” He murmured into your collarbones. 

You bit your lip before wrapping your hands around his head giving him the hint you wanted him to kiss you. 

He did. 

When he pressed his lips to yours, you deepened it, sliding his tongue against your own in a wet messy kiss. 

He huffed into your mouth and whimpered feeling his orgasm approach. You felt the changes and clenched down as best as you could fighting off your own climax to obey Tech and Crosshair to the best of your ability. 

When Wrecker was finally feeling himself fall over the edge, he grabbed your left wrist and brought it to his mouth where you felt his incisions pinch the skin. You did the same grabbing his arm and brought it to your mouth before he growled and stilled inside you before sinking down into your flesh. 

You howled throwing your head back and arched aggressively into Wrecker’s chest when you came violently from the mating bite. His thickness making you squirt all over the place and his cock. He moaned in satisfaction loving that he always got that reaction from you. 

It was his favorite. 

When you both finally came down, he flopped to the side, sliding out of you with a squelch before he could crush you. You laid there closing your eyes feeling absolutely boneless as the world began to slip away into a hazey cozy mist. 

You barely registered Hunter’s arms under you sliding you over the mattress and Tech checking your vitals with your kit scanner. You just felt fuzzy and warm inside, hearing Tech mumble something about the mating venom again.

You hummed and curled into Hunter’s chest rubbing your face into his scent searching for the comfort of your alpha. 

You felt something being pressed to your lips and you fluttered your eyes open to see Crosshair holding your tooka mug to your mouth urging you to drink with his slightly anxious expression.

When you finally responded to them, you were showered with a series of praises and good girl’s. Then you faded back into the bliss. 

~

“She needs rest.” Hunter rumbled rubbing your skin and covering the both of you in a blanket. 

“Is she okay?” Wrecker’s concern was evident. He was trying his best to fight against his own drowsiness. 

“She’s okay.” Crosshair explained, “Just probably a lot of toxins in her blood. She’ll need a bit to go back to normal. I can feel her through the bond.” 

“Wrecker may have had a larger dose given his size and their size difference.” Tech reasoned, “She’s very docile.” He was right, you were floppy. Similar to when Crosshair gave you too much pain numbing on Mimban. Hunter could feel how relaxed your muscles were under his own. 

“She looks how she did during her heat.” Hunter soothed you with gentle touches, watching you purr and gently respond to his fingers on your skin. You would preen quietly before trying to mouth at his skin.

“Let’s give her a few minutes and flush her system.” Tech decided letting Hunter cradle you, “I don’t want to overwhelm her.” 

~

You felt so safe and snuggled up against Hunter’s warm chest. He breathed smoothly as he and the others had drifted off to sleep for a quick cat nap. 

You had awakened a little later still feeling blissed out from the two mating bites. 

As you felt yourself starting to return to normal, you couldn’t help but trace the dark lines on Hunter’s pectorals. Alpha was so strong. You admired the hardness of his battle conditioned body and the spicy scent radiating from his skin. He reminded you of the sun. 

You couldn’t help yourself, you leaned forwards licking a stripe up his collarbone to his neck. Your alpha stirred in his sleep snuggling you closer with his warm arms. You purred and repeated the action licking over his pec, trying to get his scent further in your nose. 

“Mmm mesh’la.” His voice was even more gruff as you woke him. 

He kept his eyes closed, sighing as you continued to press heated kisses to his skin. 

You heard Crosshair and Wrecker stir on the mattresses beside you, no doubt sensing you both through the bonds. 

When you poked your head up from the blanket cocoon Hunter had you wrapped in, you noticed Tech reclined leisurely, sitting with his data pad, reading something casually with his sweats hanging dangerously low on his hips. You felt your blood start to heat and your core begin to stir the longer you looked at your tall alpha. His sharp hip bones and v-lines accentuated by the light of his screen made you lick your lips.

His skin was taut around his lean muscles just like Crosshair and it was making you swoon. The star map charts tattooed all over his right shoulder and ribs was beginning to make you pant. Gods he was beautiful. All your alphas are, but Tech is unique in his sharpened beauty. 

Hunter shuffled under you, running his nose through your hair before sitting up slightly to lean against a pile of your neatly folded nesting blankets propping you both up. 

“What’s got you all flustered, sweetheart?” He whispered in your ear.

He looked in the direction he had caught you staring and smirked, “Oh, is it Tech?” 

Tech stopped typing on his data pad for just a moment seeming to be responding to his name, but he didn’t look over. He then continued on like nothing was amiss. 

You nodded before rubbing your nose affectionately against Hunter’s cheek. 

The sergeant situated you so your back was pressed to his front. He kept the blanket around you two and you let your head lull into the base of his neck. 

Tech then stretched a bit, flexing his abs while he reached above him. Then he tilted his neck from side to side cracking his bones. You began to pant seeing his glands just right there in front of you just begging for you to lick and touch. You swallowed thickly.  

Hunter chuckled quietly, “Poor little omega, three alphas not enough for you Ori’Sol?” 

You sucked in a breath as his hand slid over your ribs and down your belly, parting your leg and swinging it over his own knee keeping you spread open for him. 

“I wonder how he’s going to take you, little one.” Hunter whispered in your ear trailing his finger tips teasingly back down your leg to your core. He briefly dipped into your hole making you squirm as his fingers then found your clit and he began rubbing slow steady circles, “Think, he’ll take you on your back? Just like Wrek? Or make you present for him again. Keep it traditional?” 

You moaned quietly getting flustered at Hunter’s words. You tucked your head further into him feeling your cheeks turn a ruby hue. 

“Yeah, you liked that huh?” Hunter nibbled your ear making your skin break out in goosebumps, “You like when we’re dominant with you? Put you in your place mesh’la?” 

You nodded feeling his fingers apply a little more pressure making you bite your lip to not make a sound. 

You started to squirm, clenching around nothing, making Hunter inhale, “I can smell your close little one.” He smirked and licked at his mating mark on your neck making you jolt, “Wanna get you nice and ready to take Tech, you’re going to need it sweet thing.” You shuddered feeling the pleasure begin to precipice. 

“Fuck, I heard what he and Cross have in store for you baby, I can’t wait to see you.” 

You whined baring down on his hand canting your hips. 

“Hmm. Little thing can’t seem to get enough, huh?” Crosshair’s raspy sleep ridden voice made you clench and arch against Hunter’s chest. 

“What a greedy girl.” He chided slipping around to your front where he peeled your blanket off exposing you to his greedy eyes. 

He hummed in approval before reaching forwards to trace the opening of your dripping cunt. He surged forwards pushing two fingers inside you while Hunter still rubbed your clit steadily. You yelped as Crosshair set similar pace bringing you to completion. 

You strained against Hunter’s thighs, but he out muscled you, keeping you pried open as the touches were becoming more and more overstimulating by the second.

“Look here, pretty girl.” Wrecker’s voice and touch surprised you, as he dragged your chin over to face him. He leaned forwards bringing you into a searing kiss that threw you over the cliff into a numbing orgasm. 

Your voice cracked as you moaned out and shuddered in Hunter’s lap. 

“Good girl.” Hunter praised, “Such a good girl for us.” 

He kept his slow touches as the other two withdraw making you twitch and spasm in his lap as you heard Tech finally rise and set down his data pad. 

You struggled to keep your eyes open despite the overstimulating touches that Hunter continued to make not wanting to miss a second of Tech’s mating. You watched as Tech nodded to Crosshair who disappeared from the room while Tech made his way over to you. 

He bent one knee to get on your level before he grasped your chin in his fingers, “Are you going to be a good girl, Y/N?” 

You swore your heart skipped a beat. You nodded. 

“Use your words.” Tech replied. 

You swallowed thickly trying to find your voice, “Yes, alpha.” 

“Good.” Tech released you and moved to shed his sweats from his body. He was bare underneath sending a fresh wave of slick to your core. Hunter relished in the squelching wetness as he began to finger you now just like Crosshair had. 

“Is she ready?” Tech asked Hunter who just smirked and responded with a yup.

Tech settled on the mattress leaning back on his hands. He gestured for you to come, which you obeyed immediately. Hunter released you and you crawled on your hands and knees over to your waiting alpha. 

“I want you to ride me, omega.” He said and you licked your lips looking at his hard and dripping cock. You so badly wanted him in your mouth, to taste his precum, but you knew better than to push him anymore. 

You looked at him pleadingly, “Yes, sir.” 

You heard Hunter and Wrecker move across the room where they reclined against the spare blankets and pillows watching as Tech maneuvered you over him. You reached down grasping his firm length and brought it to your core where you wiggled down until he was breaching your entrance. You bit back a groan as he took hold of your hips and guided you down onto him fully. 

You mewled at the stretch finding him just as long as Crosshair as he nudged your cervix.

“Go on, ad’ika.” He urged and you happily started your bouncing. Placing your hands on his tanned pecs, you felt his taut skin under your own, making you impossibly hotter. He ran a hand up to your neck where he grasped you and dragged you down closer to press a kiss to your lips. 

You hungrily returned the gesture letting him slip his tongue inside your mouth and explore. 

The door to the room whooshed open and Crosshair returned making you giddy that he was going to be watching you ride Tech too. You adored the way his sharp eyes took in every detail about you, it was exhilarating. 

He seemed to sense this through the bond and smiled at you mischievously. You turned to look at him with a raised brow before Tech snatched your attention back by your chin. 

“Focus, omega.” 

You doubled down not watching to displease him and continued to bounce up and down. He slid a hand up between your breasts before settling on the right one and squeezing. He teased your nipple with his thumb making you stutter in your actions just slightly before resuming your pace. 

His hand then continued back up to your neck where he grasped you firmly, “Come here.” He guided you down to press your chest against his, as his other hand wrapped around your back stilling your movements firmly. 

Tech then began to thrust upwards making you moan into his skin and claw at his chest as he drove impossibly deep inside you from below.

“You may begin, Cross.” Tech said making you want to whip your head around to look, but he kept you pinned. Tech slowed his movements down to a very, very shallow thrust that had you itching for more and anxious to see what Crosshair was up to behind your field of vision.

Then from somewhere behind you, you heard a click and a gooey squirt noise before you felt the mattress dip behind you. 

Then a cold finger pressed up against your ass making you squirm away against Tech. 

“Relax, omega.” Crosshair cooed squirting more gel onto your ass making you cry out. 

Oh fuck. 

You couldn’t believe this. 

Was this… 

Kark.

Crosshair was going to fuck your ass… 

Kriff. 

You stilled nearly entirely as he began to massage the tight ring of muscle protesting against the new intrusion. 

“I can feel you clenching, relax little one.” Crosshair gently corrected. 

“Tech?” Your voice raised in worry. 

He just looked up at you, “Do what Crosshair says, and you’ll be alright sweet thing. He’ll make sure you feel really, really good.” Clearly you weren’t getting out of this one.

You looked to Hunter and Wrecker for assurance. Hunter gave you a reassuring nod and Wrecker looked mesmerized at the site in front of him like it was nasty holoporn. But this was real, Crosshair and Tech were going to fucking you at the same time, and in the ass. 

Fuck. This was the punishment for trying to mess with Hunter. You flustered at how excited Hunter had sounded earlier. He was waiting to watch this, and you could feel it through the bond. He too was glued to the sight in front of him. 

You took a deep anxious breath before willing yourself to relax. Tech’s continuous thrusts helped a bit as Crosshair breached your hole gently with his trigger finger just gently testing you.

You bit down on your own hand feeling the foreign stretch. It was like nothing you had ever felt before. It was a mix of pain and pleasure that had you vibrating in Tech’s hold as he kept up his rocking pace. 

You were recalling Crosshair’s promise to you back on that base in Naboo. Clearly he hadn’t forgotten, and neither had you. Crosshair wanted to claim something else of yours tonight too, and now you knew what that would be…

“Good girl, keep breathing.” The sniper praised using his other hand to massage the flesh of your ass, spreading you even wider. 

“I can feel you inside her.” Tech narrated and thrusted a little harder. His words had you moaning and producing slick like you were in heat at the thought of Tech’s cock feeing Crosshair massaging your insides.

Crosshair added a second finger making you arch your back and groan. The feeling was so strange, but you didn’t want him to stop no matter now intense.

He began to scissor his fingers stretching you even further before adding a third making you cry out again. 

Fuck it felt big, even though it wasn’t even his cock yet. You swore under your breath knowing that was going to be even bigger. 

Something was communicated between the twins because Tech then moved to gather both of your wrists together in his hand as Crosshair shuffled behind you. Another sound of the lube squirting from the bottle had you trembling as Crosshair applied a heaping amount to himself before squirting more onto your puffed up hole. You whimpered again feeling the cold before it was replaced with the searing heat of his cock tip. 

His tip rubbed up against the relaxed entrance making you suck in a deep breath. The anticipation was absolutely killing you. 

“Take him, pip.” Tech ordered looking down at you as he pinned you to him. 

Crosshair surged forwards sliding inside and breaching your entrance, effectively taking your anal virginity. 

You cried out and hissed as he pushed forwards wanting to metaphorically rip the bandage off and get the worst of it over with. 

Fuck he’s big. 

And fuck it was a damn stretch.

Your voice cracked again as he sunk in even deeper making Tech have to wrangle you a bit to keep you flat and relaxed and your ass on display for his twin. 

“Fuck you’re tight mesh’la.” Crosshair groaned placing both hands on your hips to grip you.

You felt Tech’s free hand slither between your legs to rub at your clit sending delicious pleasure through your body as Crosshair finally sunk in to the hilt.

All three of you took a deep breath at the sensation of finally all being together. You could only imagine what your mated alphas were feeling through the bond as you adjusted to the new sensation of double penetration. 

“She’s even tighter like this.” Tech kept rubbing you until your hips began to grind against both of them. 

“So beautiful Y/N,” Crosshair’s hand ran against your spine making you preen into their touch, “I told you this would be mine.” He leaned forwards tapping your ass cheek, and teasing his mark on your neck with his teeth making you shudder.

Tech and Crosshair gave you a moment to get used to them both being inside you at the same time, before they both began to test out their experimental thrusts. 

You moaned feeling the two of them moving at their own pace inside you. It was a sensation you couldn’t even have imagined without experiencing it first hand. You felt unbelievably full. A fullness you couldn’t describe. It was glorious and actual omega’s wet dream.

You mewled as Tech resumed his more aggressive pace while Crosshair slowly began to match up with his twin’s. Where ever they might be, the battle field for the bedroom, they always managed to fall in line and work together as a team.

Once he was certain you were alright, Crosshair kept pace with Tech making you nearly scream with pleasure as they fucked you full. 

“Oh fuck!” You moaned out into the room struggling against Tech’s grip as pleasure over took your senses. 

Having two cocks inside you felt like heaven. You couldn’t imagine ever not feeling this full again. Something triggered the most deepest parts of your omega brain at the sensation and you felt yourself absolutely submit to them, letting them have their way with you. 

You felt boneless in their grasp. You didn’t even move when Tech released you to grab at your waist to thrust harder into you. 

“Such a good girl,” He moaned into your ear and you purred in response letting him fuck up into you, “letting Cross have your ass like a perfect obedient little omega.” 

Crosshair slid his hand up your spice again before dragging his fingers into your scalp. You felt his grip the base of your strands before pulling you up to be flush against his chest. You cried out at the change of angles feeling them even more viscerally inside you. You pawed at the air before gripping onto Crosshair’s arms as he held you up to fuck you harder. 

“Hmm,” Hunter smirked from the side where he watched, “I think she like’s being fucked in the ass. Isn’t that right sweetheart?” 

You moaned but Crosshair wasn’t having it. He used his grip on your head to face you towards his brother, “Use your words to address your Sergeant.” 

You whimpered and struggled to not babble, “Y-Yes, sir.” 

“Yes, sir what?” Crosshair snarled. 

“Yes, sir. I love being fucked in the ass.” You cried out squeezing at Crosshair’s forearms. Tech chuckled darkly from below you.

Crosshair huffed, “Say you're sorry for taking advantage of Hunter’s kind consideration.” 

“I-I’m s-sorry Sergeant for taking advantage o-of your kind c-consideration.” You babbled trying to look at Hunter but it was impossible. You felt your resolve dissolving by the second. 

“Are you still going to be a brat?” Crosshair punctuated his words with particularly hard thrusts that had you clenching down on both of them. Tech’s fingers on your clit still hadn’t let up making you absolutely dumb with pleasure. 

“No, Sir. I won’t be a brat!” You whimpered leaning into Crosshair’s hold as your head started feeling too heavy to hold up yourself. 

Tech snorted, “I’ll believe that when I see it.” 

Crosshair smirked before releasing your head to flop back down against Tech’s chest. 

You sighed absolutely turning to mush as they continued to pummel you. You heard yourself babbling against tech muttering filth and nonsense as you drooled on Tech’s skin. 

“I think we fucked her stupid,” Crosshair bent down to look at your face, “is our omega a little cock dumb whore?” 

He heard you whimper and mutter something that sounded like an agreement making him smirk with satisfaction, “Fuck.” He choked out feeling himself near his end. 

“Gonna fill this ass with my cum sweetheart.” Crosshair leaned down biting into your neck again agitating his mark making you clench down on Tech making him groan and fidget. 

Crosshair made a deep grunt sound before his hips stuttered and you felt a rush of heat filling your insides. He came, pumping his seed deep inside you feeling the way Tech was still moving inside you. He had to pull out suddenly from overstimulation and stumbled backwards to catch his breath. 

“Fuck.” He sighed in contentment. You could feel like pleasure and satisfaction through the bond making you purr. You preened at the thought of pleasing your alpha in this way. 

Tech then grunted again and you cracked open your eyes to see the sweat gathering on his skin giving him an etherial glow as he fucked you. You laid your head back down on his chest letting him have his way with you, before he suddenly flipped you both over wanting a different angle. 

You yipped, being pressed into the mattress once again, on your back for you alpha. 

His pace picked up again as he found himself renewed with energy. He grabbed your knees as pushed them upwards to you shoulders where he put you in a mating press.  You cried out feeling him impossibly deep inside you and you struggled against him feeling overwhelmed with his menstruations. 

You were beginning to feel yourself peak and you started to get squirmy again making Tech look down at you, “Are you going to cum?” 

You screamed and nodded vigorously forcing yourself to speak clearly, “Y-Yes! T-Tech!” 

He then made for your unmarked wrist, grabbing it firmly before turning it to bring to his mouth. He pressed his wrist up to yours as he felt you cresting around him. He pressed his wrist to your mouth letting you lick at his scent gland. 

“Tech!” You screamed as you came, then you screamed again as he finally bit you. You had to force yourself to breathe or else you would have passed out. 

The fourth and final pice of your soul was finally set into place. Tech’s aura surrounded you in a warm blanket along with the others who were just out of reach, but near by. 

Everything finally felt balanced and right. 

You were snapped out of your omega subspace when you heard Tech calling your name softly. 

You blinked a few times hearing the ringing in your ears dissipate before you regained your awareness. 

All four of your alphas were looking down at you with varying looks of unease. 

“Come here sweetheart.” Tech cooed, “Come back.” 

You blinked before you felt a strange itch in your chest. 

“Shhh. Shhh it’s alright, here you go.” You smelled Tech’s skin under your nose where he had used his other hand to guide you to his scent gland. He cradled your head as you weakly found his arm and brought it even closer to your face before you smushed it to your lips and chomped down on him. 

You tasted his iron blood making you turn to lick the little wound. 

You didn’t even notice when Tech yelped and Crosshair had to pry you away from his arm. 

“Fuck, she was in deep.” Hunter said petting you. 

You smiled before they let you flop back down on the mattress totally debauched. 

The longer you lay there, you were starting to feel the soreness in your body and the wear in your holes. Especially your ass. You didn’t dare move knowing you wouldn’t be able to sit right for days. 

When Wrecker brought you your tooka mug, you greedily sucked down the water finishing off the cup. 

Thats when you realized you were still connected to Tech. The pilot gently moved the two of you ignoring you groans of protest to keep you on top of him. He yanked a blanket up and over the both of you keeping himself plugged inside you and his cum snuggly within your warm walls.

 The post mating haze settled in once again, but this time there was no reason to move. 

You sighed feeling at peace and whole… and full… very very full…

Hunter must have switched off the lights at some point, as the four of you drifted off into some much needed sleep for the remainder of the ride through hyperspace.

There was an exciting future on the horizon on Zyphora. Any trepidation you might have had was now resolved. It didn’t matter where you are in the galaxy, as long as you had your mates you knew everything would be okay. 

Sleep quickly over took you and your exhausted body. You snuggled into Tech’s warmth like a sunning lizard as he wrapped a protective arm around you.

“I love you pretty girl.” He whispered before drifting off into some much needed peaceful sleep. 

Your heart fluttered, “I love you too, Tech.” 

You couldn’t wait for what tomorrow would bring. 

Pip has had some good times on the Marauder...

Hope you guys enjoyed their little reunion and little... union... hehe

─ ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──── ♡ ─── ⋅ ⋅ ⋅ ──

Taglist: @substantial-exposure

@rains-on-kamino

@minimissmoo

@z-and-the-batboys

@aynavaano

@9902sgirl

@sideofhorny

@sxftiebee

@booksandtitts-blog

@subbing-for-clones

[acetechne]

Condensed Milk - A Dirty Money Comic pt 13

[part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 4] [part 5] [part 6] [part 7] [part 8] [part 9] [part 10] epilogue: [part 11] [part 12] [ x ] [part 14] [part 15]

sorry for the wait i was a bit busy having another existential crisis and then i went camping and then my roof started leaking so ! this thing keeps getting away from me and I have no idea still about a conclusion. I had a conversation written that i could put after this page, I just need to iron it out a bit.

I think the interesting thing about the dynamic between bert and annie is there is a very thin veneer of civility between them... but at least they’re honest about their feelings? haha. I think Bertie appreciates a good straightforward row once in a while. He also has some experience in tourism naturally, but he doesn’t depend on it nearly as much as Annie does.

- he did make the shortbread with his own hands actually :C rip shortbread.

- annie says he’s in the wrong place to look for money but i actually started writing this comic after a news article came out saying albertans were going to NL to work for once instead of the other way around, so the original comic was about Bertie begging for a job, haha.

- like i’ve said i started drawing the original prequel to this after the federal election and there was this weird fallout where people from NL living/working in Alberta felt “betrayed” by the home province voting liberal and it was like...... ok.... sorry you’ve been drinking the dino juice too i guess

- not a spark of warmth? coal is where warmth comes from silly! [wiping sweat off brow] haha isn’t it great we’re bringing it back in fashion [coughing]

- annie was a literal indentured servant in the 19th century so it’s personal

- bert blushing ‘does this make my neck look red’

- hypocrite as i’ve said is the most devastating insult next to liberal you can call someone in alberta i think. at least, in our minds it’s supposed to be an instant argument winner and it always works if you believe that it does and don’t actually know what an argument is.

-  ben likes them because they’re annoying :)

- BERTICUS USED WESTERN SEPARATISM! it’s not very effective. i feel like the difference between qc separatism and alberta separatism is that qc separatism is based on this idea of a separate language and culture and ab separatism is based on the idea that canada will finally acknowledge how we are somehow More canadian than the rest of canada and also the most special and important princess and we invoke it most when we really really want a “no, please stay we love you!!!” so when we get the same “ok then just leave lol” that we love giving quebec, it’s a shock.

[bowtiesnmusicals]

Here is my recap of the To The Max (Adler) episode of the podcast.

Jenna makes a joke that Kevin is the special guest. Kevin says grim…you couldn’t do better then me.

Max is probably the only cast member that was actually in show choir. Kevin said he was the most qualified person on the show. Jenna said she is surprised they didn’t audition him for Puck. Kevin said Robert Ulrich had a vision and really nailed it. Kevin said he trusts Robert Ulrich.

Max talked about his son. He said he is talking up a storm into planes, garbage trucks and construction vehicles. He said they a re battling to get him to sleep in his own room.

Max talked about the writers strike. He said he is trying to figure out life amongst the strike. He is producing and acting. Kevin said it is interesting because the last time the writers strike happened Glee happened. It worked out for them last time. Maybe a reboot. Max said maybe he could be a shoe(schue) in no pun intended. The mentioned a reboot. Max joked that he wouldn’t be invited back. Jenna and Kevin said same that they also would just be watching. Max mentioned a podcast called Strike Talk. It’s all about the strike. They also had a whole conversation about mini rooms which is like a show writer and two writers that write an entire season of a show instead of like a team of ten writers. This is much like how Glee was for the first two seasons. It was just Ryan, Ian, and Brad. Glee was also unique in that it was 22 episodes and not 8, 10, or 12 like many shows that might use a mini room.

Jenna asked Max about his audition for Glee. Max said he was doing the valet/restaurant/day job game. He was working at Macaroni Grill and missed a shift for a callback for a Montana Meth project. Meth was a big problem in Montana and they were trying to battle that through PSAs. He booked this gig. He was fired the same day he got into SAG. He worked at another restaurant and was doing bit on Ghost Whisperer and What About Brian. He had an agent and begged him to get in for a series regular on Glee. He mentioned that he and Jenna were the only people in show choir. He was a huge show choir person in high school. They toured and competed. He sang and danced. He went to the Bahamas and Chicago. He lived the Glee life. He loved Nip/Tuck. He would have parties at his parents house and friends houses. When he heard the creator of Nip/Tuck was doing a show about show choir he was like please please get me in. Kevin said nothing is more specifically right for you. Max said right, right but in the world of Hollywood they didn’t see him. They didn’t see it and didn’t think he was right. He dropped his headshot off every week at Unique A casting. They brought him in for two lines one day for both Karofsky and Azimio. He had to read for both parts. He coached on it for 2 hours. It was the big monologue where he talks to Quinn and Finn. He was like who is this guy and why is he saying this and wanted to stand out. He waked in so prepared and there were like 45 dudes and he saw Ashley Angel from O-Town and was like I’m going to go back to the restaurant game. There is no way they are going to go for me. He went in and did his thing and Robert in the room said I think you are the guy for this. This never happens. He was like that was the best read of the day, I think you are my choice. Max was like this would be a dream come true, give me two lines I want to be on this show. There’s was already this hype and buzz that the show was going to be shooting to the moon. He was pumped just to get on. When he got the call he was doing Richard II with the Shakespeare group Porters of Hellsgate where he met his wife. Jenna asked if he was doing this in LA. Max said yes. Kevin said acclaimed actor. He was like if he can do Shakespeare he can bang out these two lines on Glee. So he got the call and it made his day and then went on to change his life.

It was really exciting and he had no idea where it would go. It was just two lines and the biggest thing about it was the slushee. He was called in advance to practice with a dummy. Jenna said he was the first slushee thrower that he was the og. Kevin said there were slushee’s in the pilot and that someone slushied Lea. You didn’t see there face though. Max said the prop master was passionate about the slushees. They had started with rubber pieces but it bounces off the face. They will heat it in the microwave so it won’t be so cold but it wouldn’t read. Then he said f it we are going to use real slushee but don’t miss you’ve only got one take. If you miss your are going to mess up the clothes and make up and the set and everyone is going to be pissed. He came in and they adjusted it to Cory’s height. He was like go for the nose we want it to explode all over the face. Don’t get the chest. Don’t get the chin. There was so much pressure. Max was like what I’m an actor. I’m not a slushee thrower I don’t know what is going to happen. He said the prop master would be in a corner stirring and waiting for Cory to come around the corner right at the last moment Max was like I better get it right and luckily he did. Jenna said he threw a lot of slushies. Max said he got slushied once but he had zombie make-up covering his face so it wasn’t as bad. Kevin said must be nice. Jenna said were you guys slushied in the same episode. Was it the Super Bowl episode? Max said yeah they were coming down the hallway in their letterman jackets and they were slushied by the Hockey players. Kevin that hockey team that you ere originally a part of. Max said yeah there was that yeah I think so the hockey team turned football team. Kevin said all the sports. Max said something about a change of heart. He was an athlete or jock.

Kevin asked how did go from you getting these two lines to you becoming a huge central figure to the entirety of the series. Max said first of all thats very nice. Kevin said your characters influenced one the biggest characters on the show and that he had an incredible and crazy storyline through all 6 seasons. Kevin said he loved that it all started with Max dropping his headshots off at the casting directors office and him getting called in and workin on those two lines. He asked did they call him back for Azimio and Karofsky back for another couple of lines here and it just evolved. Max said he only thought there was that one and every actors dream that they notice something and ask him back but he was like what can they notice in two lines. Then he got the call they wanted to bring him back and he did the Supercuts line. He was like great I will come back. He was like if I can get enough of these I can quit the restaurant. Max said it was the dream because he was a fan of the show. Cory welcomed him with his gigantic heart and arms. He introduced Max to his mom. Max said it was five episodes for the first season.

Max said he remembered the season 2 premiere party at Paramount. Someone turned to him and was like this is for cast only. He said he still wasn’t recognized as part of Glee even though now he had done 5 episodes. Ryan came up to him party and like kind of secretly is like we just wrote something really special for you. Jenna joked on episode 21. Max was like a rainbow slushie or magical slushie. Then he got the script, someone would deliver them an actual paper script. It was Never Been Kissed where Karofsky kissed Kurt. He said it was outstanding because he had coached this whole time about what is this guys problem. What does he want? Why is he being a bully? He tried to understand bullies. He was giving it so much more then he felt he had to but he is so glad it developed into something that felt real and grounded. It gave him purpose for doing everything he had been doing. In his mind it was natural jealousy that Kurt gets to sing a song and be in a show choir and I’m a jock and I am going to bully you for that. But then when it was revealed these were the reasons it got so much more complex and so much more depth. Max said he knew people like that in high school. It was kind of a dream come true. He said Dante Di Loretto had been cold to him and Dante watched the rehearsals for the locker room scene. It was the first time he smiled, gave him a nod, patted him on the back and handshake. Max was like okay this means something and he took it very seriously and is happy with the way it came out. Kevin mentioned they just watched the episode and that him and Chris were phenomenal in the episode. He said Karofsky was beating the shit out of Kurt the whole episode. Jenna was like wow that is intense. Max said there were times when he was shoving Chris into the locker bay and someone in the crew would say can you not push him that hard. Let’s just take it easy. Max was like I’m sorry I was trying to make the sound and get into it. He felt so terrible and was like are you okay, I’m so sorry. He said he definitely beat him up and he pushed Darren gate in that episode.

Max said that was a big one and right after that it was crazy. He got invited with Josh Sussman and Patrick Gallagher to go to D.C. to the Kennedy Center. He ws getting a sense of what the main cast had been living with. He said it changed overnight. The world became different through his eyes and it was crazy how that happened. He said he remembered getting invited to a cast and crew screening and Brad saying I think you are going to be really proud of the episode. He said Kevin after the screening ran into his arms for a big hug and it was validation. It was like welcome to the show. Kevin said it is one of those things. It’s so hard to get a job. You are happy to get your two lines and then to watch someone come on the show. It’s hard to be the person that pops in and out. It really is especially when it was an ensemble cast that was really close. He mentioned they talked to Josh Sussman about this and how those two related to each other because they had a similar trajectory on the show. He said to see someone get given that storyline and then be so good and the care Max had with Karofsky the entire time. He said we got to watch our friends sing and do these crazy scenes and were always so proud of each other and to see someone like Max just bring it seemingly going from oh I am just going to say a mean thing and push someone against a locker and then here you are with this really beautiful and sensitive storyline. It meant a lot to see that as a friend and fellow actor and just being fan of Max’s. It was special. Max said thank you and it felt special. He said even now it will be tough to find a role that is awesome and complex and nuanced and on a show that gets that many ratings and eyeballs. He said he has shot stuff before that and since then that you when you are shooting it you are like who knows if this going to see the light of day. Who know how many people will watch. He said it was exciting being on the Glee set knowing that what we are doing is going to be watched in a few weeks by 14 million people or whatever it was and it like this will change some minds and change some hearts. It will influence people and maybe save some lives. That was the biggest thing. It transcended just a role on tv to making a difference. He started getting letters, emails, messages of people saying they had seen some gay people portrayed on tv but they weren’t the masculine jock that you didn’t see coming. Thank god for this because they feel validated and seen. It was things were their family had disowned them and after seeing this episode they understood now who they were and reached out to patch the family back up. He said it was insane to just be a part of it. It made him take things more seriously. He was representing a lot of people that didn’t feel seen or heard which is the whole point of the show.

Max said what was so weird about that is that he never had the Ryan sit down or like this is what we are going to do or lets talk about what people are feeling about it. He said he would try but he would’ve get much of a response. He mentioned Life of Pi. He said he just wants that lion to look back and acknowledge him. He was like thats Glee. There was never anyone that was like hey we did it or good job on the storyline. It just kind of ended. He was like did just that happen and still waiting for that closure. He said he understand what they are talking about because he has been the bigger part of shows and its like you bond more because you spend so much time together. The guest stars are great and awesome. It’s like in high school where you can go the same school but unless you have that one night of partying where the truth comes out. You have that bond and talk about it the next day. Its like he’s in my science class but were not like that. He said he understood the pecking order. He said weird that the outside world was like you are on Glee and a cast member and doing it. He was like am I though. He was straddling the fence of when will I be back, will I be back. He was like am I going back to the bread lines. It was a very weird unstable 6 years but also the most exciting and rewarding. He said he is still trying to deal with that.

Jenna said he had such a big storyline even after the initial kiss to the big episode where you attempt suicide. It is a massive undertaking. She asked what it was like when he read that script. Did he know that was coming? Did Ryan drop any nuggets? What was the response? Did it shift at that point? Max said it solidified his place on the show. He worked with his coach and was like this guy in a small town worried about his sexuality getting out there, his dad, society. In reality he would probably think about suicide. Max was like they would never do that on a Fox musical comedy. So when it actually came to him he was like oh my gosh and thank you to the writers for doing this character justice and showing what could happen to someone in that situation and in that position. Let’s be real about it and let’s really touch lives and save some hearts and change peoples minds and open peoples eyes. He said it was a brutal episode to film. It’s as a very dark space. He had to understand what would lead to someone committing suicide. The hopelessness and not having anyone to turn to and being at the literal end of your rope. It’s dark. He said he remembers sitting in the golf cart with Brad Buecker right outside the studio for like an hour. He was telling Max really vulnerable things about his life and mindset and where he’s been. Max was confessing stuff to him about when his mom passed. It was a very emotional talk that put him in a great space to go in and film. He knows he is representing people. At this time Fox sent him to Dr. Phil, Access Hollywood, and Dr. Drew. He was out there talking about teen suicides and cyber bullying. This was the forefront of when Anderson Cooper and Ellen and everyone was talking about cyber bullying and teen suicides. He was like this is crazy that he was playing this role at this time in the world and that this might not ever happen again. It was huge. He said the biggest reward was that the Trevor Project flashed their hotline at the end of the episode and the calls went through the roof. It was the highest percentage of people that reached for help after that episode. He said to be a part of that was incredibly rewarding and an honor.

Keviin said how lovely it was that during Never Been Kissed and On My Way he had Brad Buecker at the helm both times. He is the most thoughtful and generous person. He asked if it was helpful because he was there for the advent of Karofsky real journey having him be a through line. He said the Dante and Ryan’s were doing other things. Buecker was editing the show at the same time he really knew all the characters so so well. He asked if he found that as an actor to have Brad connect those dots for him. Max said he absolutely loved working with Brad. He said he thinks it was the first time that he worked with a director that was an editor. Kevin mentioned Never Been Kissed was Brad’s first episode. Max said there must ave been 20 different takes for the locker room. He said it was so fun because he came through one door and Chris came through another door. He said Brad would go back and forth between Max and Chris and give them idea of things to try. Max said it was fun because they got to try everything he was feeling and didn’t have to hold back or try to get it right. He said he wanted to work with Brad again. He said the same thing with On My Way there was already that trust built in. He was like I don’t know how many tears you can get out of me. He said it was really great working with him. He said Brad treated where he walked through the locker room and saw fag on the locker and he was like its going to be in slow motion and I want to see your life leave your body. The way he shot and pushed in and cue Cough Syrup. He said he got emotional watching it. Brad and Max got invited to Sacramento for a couple of years and be a part of a program called Directing Change because of that episode. All of these high school students were making short films about mental health awareness, stigmas, and suicide prevention. Brad and Max were there to represent, they spoke to the kids and judged the videos. Now they were in the real world talking about these issues from the storyline. It took on a serious part of his life. He wanted to understand what he was talking about because he was talking to real kids going through it. This is more then just memorizing lines and showing up. It was a crazy time.

Kevin said it is crazy to think about how when the show came out and it started to do well they became conscious that x number of people are going to see what we are doing right now. When they did the first 13 episodes no one had seen anything but the pilot. He said knowing that you are doing these really serious things and then having a 3 week turn around. He asked in those 3 weeks did you ever get scared or nervous because every time he was on screen he had some really heavy shit. Kevin said for us they were like I am excited for my parents to see this musical number or I get to get out of the chair and dance. For Max, he was acting through some really tough things. Kevin said he got scared for people to see some things. He asked what was going through Max’s head knowing that 15 million people were going to see this. Max said excitement and there was no fear. He moved out to LA when he was 18 right after high school. He was like everyone was saying they were going college and he was like I’m going to LA an see what happens, don’t laugh at me. He was like I better make it because there was no plan b. He said to be on a dream show with a dream creator knowing people are watching it. He said all his high school friend were watching it. He had a big support base from family and friends. His wife Jenn studied theater in London with this guy Jeremy O’Keefe who ended up being a casting director. He overheard while he was working at a restaurant talking about how he also bartends at a bar called Silver Spoon. They had a back room where they would have Glee Nights. He said he things it was a gay bar. They would show Glee hand have drinks. Max was like you know I’m on that show. Jeremey said come on by and so it became a thing where Max would go with 20 friends and they would watch the episode and have drinks. He said he remembers when he got Never Been Kissed there were people that were like is your dad going to be cool with this. You are kissing a dude on national tv. What are you going to do? He said he didn’t even think about it until he was confronted with it. He was like no, I’m an actor, and a kiss is a kiss. Lips are lips. A storyline is a storyline. He didn’t really think about that element of it. He just thought about the character and the instinct of why he has been doing what he’s been doing for a year and this release. Kevin said he too it so seriously. Max said it almost felt like he was shooting a different show. It was crazy they were putting it in this episode. Jenna said we always say the Kurt and Burt, the heavy and heart of the show and then you have the clowns. It was sometimes two different shows. Max said that is what worked. Through the circus of that you have that little notice of let me pound you in the heart with this. He said it reminded of that American Beauty scene where Chris Cooper kisses Kevin Spacey in the garage. He said that scene rattles him still and was like that was powerful. He said if they can come anywhere close to capturing that feeling of just the release of what this guy must be feeling wondering what it feels like to kiss a guy after 16 years or whatever it is. Let’s show that release. Then he found out Ryan knew people like that in high school. Brad Falchuck had a friend named Dave Karofsky that messaged Max on Facebook. He’s not at all like the character. It was very rewarding and he was excited to do that storyline. He said it was more negative before Karofsky exposes what his deal is and then it became like thank you and I feel scene. He said this was a crazy ride.

Jenna said speaking of a crazy ride his storylines get crazier. Kevin said they don’t remember season 5 and 6 but mostly 6. Kevin said someone tweeted that they knew this is when I knew Glee went off the rails, when Karofsky and Blaine started dating. Kevin was like this happened. Kevin sand no offense to you or anybody he doesn’t know what happened with him and that he doesn’t know anything. Jenna said I don’t know where we were at that time. Max said they had checked out and were just along for the ride. It was a long time ago and they were a long time in and it was a cyclone blur and it was wild. Kevin said tell us about that experience. Max said at that point I’ve done what I’m going to do. The serious stuff with this character that is going to make an impact has stopped. The show has changed and the world has changed. He was happy to be along for the ride, happy to be a part of the show, happy to keep seeing everyone and keep putting on the jacket, and happy to have an income and be working. He said it was fun at that point. He said there was so much pressure on those earlier episodes. He said everyone would be having fun at base camp and he wold be in his trailer doing breathing exercises. He had one shot to nail this and represent hundreds of thousands of people. Kevin said these assholes are singing lady Gaga and I have talk about suicide. Max said I wish I was singing Lady Gaga. He said there was a freedom in that and they had each other and having fun. He was like this was on me and I have to nail it or I am not asked back. There was a very big pressure until season 6. He was like there is Jane Lynch telling me and Darren are related with a family tree at a restaurant. He said love Darren and that they hit it off from the beginning during Never Been Kissed and said they are still close. He was like this is insane but I get to work with you, my buddies and work with you and Chris and cool directors and have a good time. He said it was fun to be a part of it without the weight or pressure of what it was at that point. He mentioned that he got a nice happy ending that didn’t result in a suicide. It is okay to be out in the world and happy, to date , and go do line dancing at gay bars and be out there. It gives people hope that there is a life and a world that will accept you. People will understand you and feel free to reach out to people and try things. He was appreciative of that and that it didn’t end in a tragic way. He just had fun. It was weird thing. Him and Blaine dated. Jenna said Tina tried to date him too. Max said it was a good time.

Jenna asked Max what is the feeling that Glee leave him with. Max said longing. He said he knows that is kind of sad. It was a great time in his life. It was a huge hit show and all the perks that came with it and being seen for your work. He said it was like listening in a bottle. Who know if or when it will come again. He is a parent now. Everything is different now. He said he can’t believe that happened when they were in their 20s. They were footloose and fancy free. What a time. There won’t be a show like again. it won’t really be the same. it was very cool to be with people the same age and going through it. He looks upon those times very fondly. He said he wasn’t in the trenches or the drama as much as the main cast. It’s been all good for him. He misses it. Jenna said that’s awesome they are grateful to have him. She said watching it as a viewer vs an actor in the show it’s really different and profound. They get to see the work he put in and how serious he took the role and how he approached and it really paid off. She said they are really grateful for him and his time not he show, and what he shared with everyone and coming on and hanging out with them again and his friendship. Max said the feeling is mutual. He said thank you for everything you guys did on the show. Jenna said they were just clowns on Glee. Max said thanks for having me and congrats on the show. They said they will voice memo him if they have questions during the podcast. Max said bring it on and that he will be standing by. Kevin said thanks and that it was so good to see him. Max said it was so good to see them and thanks and to take care.

Jenna asked Kevin if he knew that David Schwimmer quit tv right before he got Friends. He quit and went back to Chicago to do theater. Marta Koffman and the creators of Friends were like we wrote this with you in mind. You have to come back and do it. He had a bad experience on another tv show and was like never again. They were like we promise this will be different just come back. He was like alright if you wrote it for me I will come back. Kevin was like see what happens when you are good. Max is just good. They had no idea he had all that formal training. He said you are sweet man and keep it up you are so talented. They said they will have to have him back. That they have so many more questions for everyone.

See you next time.

[marveloussupernerd]

Okay. So I just watched the Hunger Games and was wondering what the RFA+V+Searans reaction would be to MC having to fight in the games? That would be so scary and sad.

I LOVE THIS REQUEST also I’m adding Vanderwood too oops

You Get Picked for the Hunger Games - RFA + Minor Trio

Important Note: if you’d like any of these written in a more in-depth one or two shot I’m begging you to request it I love this prompt so much. That’s why I didn’t write about the actual games happening :) hoping maybe someone may want a pt2 of any of these

Warnings: mentions of death, killing, a lil angst

Zen

You were in District 7, the lumber district

You and Zen had been together for years

You liked to spend time in the forests together, getting a little peace from the real world

More aptly out, you liked to climb the trees together and spend the day in them; you would all day if you didn’t have to go home to help with your younger siblings

“I’m so sick of the games,” you grumbled. The reaping was today, where the tributes would be picked. “At least its our last year in the poll to be picked.”

“Thank goodness.” He agreed, leaning forward to place a kiss on your lips. “Then we can finally get married and start a family.”

You giggled. “We have to take care of my siblings too”

He shrugged. He’d do anything for you

When they picked you, your heart stopped

Nobody volunteered; they usually didn’t in 7

As the lady went to pick for the boys, you scanned the crowd for Zen

Shaking your head vigorously. He couldn’t volunteer

You felt like you were going to cry or die of anticipation

He understood

It killed him inside but he didn’t volunteer

You got to meet with him to say goodbye before you were off to the Capitol

“Zen,” you whimpered. He pulled you in for a tight hug

“Take care of my siblings. Okay?”

He nodded. He was at a loss of words for the first time ever

Then he inhaled deeply, fishing in his pockets and pulling out a small copper band

“Put this on and we’re married. I don’t care if that’s not how it works. I can’t have you leave without marrying you first.”

You took it wordlessly

“Your family is mine now. I’ll take care of them. You focus on coming back home.”

You wanted to cry. “Don’t... don’t let them watch me die, Zen.”

“You’re not going to.” He was crying now too, despite the confidence in his words

“Promise me though. If I’m going to die don’t let them watch.”

He sighed. He didn’t want to even consider that

“I won’t.”

Yoosung

You were in district 11, the agriculture district

Yoosung’s family lived on the farm next to yours

You had been close friends your whole lives

When they picked you

Well, you had put your name in a few extra times to get more food for your family

It shouldn’t have been a surprise

Nobody volunteered. They never do.

They made you sit in a room while you waited for the train

Your family could come say goodbye if they wanted

You were surprised to see Yoosung

“This wasn’t supposed to happen” was all he could say

You frowned

You weren’t confident in your chances

“I- everything was supposed to be different. I was going to tell you I loved you,” he whispered, his voice so low you had to take a minute to process what he had said

“You do?” You asked

“I do. First Rika and now you? I- I can’t...”

Rika had been picked two games ago and was killed

“I’ll just have to win then,” you said, more determined than before

“You- oh?”

“I love you too Yoosung. I’ll just have to win for you. So you don’t have to lose us both.”

He wrapped you into a hug

“I’m holding you to that. You promise me you’ll come back to my arms safely.”

You chuckled. “Okay. I promise.”

Jaehee

You lived in district 6, the transportation district

It was no secret to those in your district that you and Jaehee loved each other, as more than friends

It was nice that you lived in such a progressive district that they understood that

Volunteering wasn’t normal in district 6

But when you heard them call Jaehee’s name...

You wouldn’t let her die in the games

“I volunteer as Tribute.”

The crowd was silent

They all knew

The Peacekeepers pushed Jaehee back into the crowds, escorting you to the stage

She was sobbing

And then she passed out

“A volunteer! How exciting. Why did you volunteer for that girl?” The lady asked you

“Because I’m in love with her.”

“Oh!”

The Capitol would eat that up

You didn’t even get to say goodbye to her

The Capitol wanted a show. And the show was better if you didn’t get to say goodbye

“So you have to win then. Win and go back to her and steal her heart. Her hero. Her savior,” Caesar had said in his interview with you

You’d have to win then

Jumin

Being from district 3, the electronics district, meant that you and your families were much better off than most other districts

Jumin came from one of the wealthiest families in the district

He probably was even more wealthy than some of the people in the Capitol

He could buy anything, right?

But he couldn’t buy you a ticket out of the games

“Listen to me.” He sat down across from you, as he met with you before you had to leave to head to the Capitol for the games. “You’ll win.”

“I- how?”

He had the smallest curve of a smile on his face. He was confident.

“I’ll sponsor you. Anything you need, you just say it. I’ll buy it and send it your way.”

It was true that district members could sponsor, they just usually didnt

But this time, he was invested

“I have a list of all the things I can send you. Food, water, medicine, bandages, weapons, rope, anything you want. I can even send you a teddy bear.”

“Please don’t send me a teddy bear. Only important things. Those are expensive.”

“I have money.” He cupped your cheek. “I’m going to make sure you win. I will do anything in my power to do so. If I go broke, okay. You’re so much more important than money.”

“I’ll try my best to make sure I don’t need to ask you for things.”

He rolled his eyes. “You’re so stubborn. Let me help you. Don’t get into fights intentionally. Just outlive the others. I’ll send you food every day for weeks if it’s what it takes.”

It was time for you to go

He pulled you into a quick, heated kiss. “Anything, My Love. I promise.”

707

You were from district 5, the power district

The games were not big in your district. You had a few victors but people mostly dreaded them

So it wasn’t surprising that when you were picked nobody volunteered

There was no way you could win

You were weak. You had seen the other tributes picked in district 1 and 2 today

You were lucky if you’d survive the first day

You had zoned out the rest of the Reaping ceremony

Until...

“I volunteer as tribute!”

He didn’t.

But he had

Once you both got on the train, you were ready to confront him

“Seven!” You yelled. “Why! Why?” You were hitting his chest. You were so mad at him. “Why would you do this?”

You were breaking down

He just pulled you close, hugging you

“I’m going to make sure you survive”

There could only be one victor

He knew that though. Didn’t he?

“My home life sucks anyways. Sacrificing my life for you is the best thing I could ever wish for.”

You were sobbing. He seemed oddly okay.

He would make sure you’d survive

V

You were from district 8, the textile district

V’s work with the textiles and art was so good that once he had passed the age where he would have been pulled for the hunger games, he was invited to the Capitol to be a stylist

You thought you’d never see him again

Until you were picked

And then there he was

With his hair dyed bright blue to fit in with the people at the Capitol

A stupid smile on his face as he got scissors to start shaping your hair for the event tonight

“You seem awfully happy,” you said smugly. You were going to die and he was grinning. He had become a stupid member of the Capitol after all

“I get to see you again.”

“I’m going to die,” you said simply

He shrugged.

Just shrugged.

“I actually have a plan.”

Oh?

He leaned close to you to whisper in your ear

If anyone found out, they’d have him killed

“I have a way for everyone to think you died in the games, but for you to stay living”

It was a big risk

But you wouldn’t say no to the chance of staying alive

Of course he wasn’t upset

He had a plan.

Saeran

You were from district 2, the weaponry district

District 2 was a part of a group called the careers in the hunger games

Basically districts 1, 2, and 4 trained their teenagers to enter the games and win

They were unstoppable

You had trained as well, of course

But you weren’t like some of your crazy classmates who wanted to enter the games

They wanted to enter, until they heard about the twist for this year’s games

Every 25 years there was a special twist to make it more interesting

Every 3 hours a tribute would be randomly killed off

More aptly out, they put a bomb mechanism inside you and you explode

You couldn’t train to beat that

So it was no surprise that nobody volunteered to take your place once your name was picked

Saeran was fuming when he met with you

He had been training to become one of the Capitol’s soldiers, a Peacekeeper, as most men in 2 did

But he had lost all respect for them and the game

“This is stupid and unfair. What’s the point of them randomly killing people off? It’s supposed to be a fight to the death. This is just random chance.”

“I agree with you. But there’s nothing we can do. I’ll just try to kill people as quick as possible before they even get to explode someone.”

“No.”

“No?” You questioned

“This is bullshit.” He grabbed you by the chin to look up at him. “I’m taking down the Capitol. They can’t do this to you?”

“Saeran, don’t.”

He had an evil grin

“I already have a group to do it with.”

Vanderwood

You were from district 12, the coal mining district

Vanderwood was always a sort of enigma to you

That’s why you were so interested in him

And he was absolutely infatuated with you

Nobody had ever volunteered in 12 before

So when you got picked, you were stuck

Vanderwood didn’t volunteer. Why would he? Why would he get himself killed like that?

You almost though he wasn’t going to visit you, that all your time together was just him messing around

And then he busted in

“Hurry Babe”

“Hurry what?” You questioned

He grabbed your arm and pulled you to follow him, running through the halls. Where were the peacekeepers?

“I’m getting you out of here. We’re running away”

“To where?”

He laughed, still running. “The woods. We’ll figure it out. We’re not following those bullshit rules.”

“If we get caught, we’ll be killed.” You were afraid to defy the Capitol

“If you stay there, you’re as good as dread. We’ve had one victor from here, yknow? Your chances aren’t good. Let’s run.”

[misslilli]

Felix Felicis

MSR. AU. PG-13. | tagging @today-in-fic | AO3

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10

Chapter 11 - Friday Night's Alright For Fighting

[ FM ]

On Friday, it’s Felix’s mother’s turn to pick him up from school since he’ll be spending the weekend at her place. I briefly wonder if he’ll tell her about his new-found admiration for the enigmatic Miss Scully and for just a little bit, the petty side of me wishes he would. It’s not that she’s a bad mother per se, but she never shared a strong connection with our son and ever since the divorce, it somehow got worse instead of better.

Felix took the divorce pretty hard, lashing out at me and the teacher and kids at kindergarten. There were times when I couldn’t even recognize my own kid. Because of my background in psychology, I tried to talk to him countless times but I finally had to admit that I was too emotionally involved to really help him. So we began to see a therapist back in Washington, D.C, him and I. His mother refused to participate because “He never acts out when he’s at my place, Fox, seems to me like that’s a you-problem.” That day, only the thought of what would become of my son if I went to jail had kept me from murdering her on the spot.

We don’t stay in contact much, except for negotiating pick-up and drop-off times for Felix, and that’s about all I can handle from her. The custody battle was a hot mess, not because she particularly wanted to keep Felix, but she used it to humiliate me, dragging my abilities as a father and caretaker through the mud in front of a judge and our lawyers. I tried to keep Felix out of the court hearings, putting my foot firmly down when her lawyer suggested that we could just ask the child where he wanted to live. He was three years old at the time, fat chance I was going to let that happen.

Thankfully, we were able to convince the judge that I was willing and more than capable of caring for our son and that me working from home was a more child-friendly environment than his mother’s job, which takes her out of the country several times a month.

I take off my reading glasses and close my laptop, this trip down memory lane has put me in a sour mood. After putting away everything work-related for the weekend, I stretch my arms over my head, contemplating what to do with my free time. I don’t have any friends here yet and since I can’t meet anyone at work, I decide to walk down the street to the harbor.

The streets are pretty busy with locals and tourists alike and as I walk past the crowd that stand around the rock that marks the place where the pilgrims debarked the Mayflower back in 1620, I think to myself ‘Guys it’s just a rock. In the ground. Walled in on all four sides.’ I was pretty disappointed, if you couldn’t already guess that.

I continue my walk and pass the dock where you can usually see the Mayflower II anchored, swaying with the waves of the Atlantic. She’s an accurate and beautiful reproduction of the original ship with which the pilgrims had sailed to America, founding Plymouth Colony after 10 gruesome weeks at sea.

Currently though, the dock is empty safe for a few seagulls harassing the tourists – they have taken the ship to a shipyard in Connecticut for restoration, much to Felix’s chagrin. When he heard that we were going to move here, he spent countless hours reading up on the history of Plymouth, the Pilgrims and everything that happened afterwards. He got a real kick out of imagining the American Protestors and the British Government officials dressed up in frilly dresses and huge feathered hats, actually having a fancy tea party instead of the Boston Tea Party, which escalated the American Revolution in 1773.

His special interest, though, had been captured by the Mayflower, which is not surprising because he loves anything that’s big and can transport people or cargo. Planes, helicopters, trains, you name it, but especially ships. On the first night in our new house, he insisted that we leave the boxes packed for now and head down to the harbor, right now.

At first, always the responsible adult, I refused, but he didn’t let up, resorting to pleading with me, then he practically begged me and when I still wouldn’t budge he went in for the kill with his puppy-dog look and a pronounced pout. I could see the tears welling up in his eyes. Damn, he was using my very own look against me!

The tears still came a little while after, when we reached the harbor and found the dock deserted. I wanted to kick myself for not checking if the ship was actually there or not and I had to carry a bawling, devastated Felix back to our house. He only stopped crying when I promised him that we’d go see the Mayflower II the very second she sailed back into the harbor.

After another, more pleasant, trip down memory lane, I had reached my destination: The Cabby Shack, a local bar and restaurant that is made up of an inside bar downstairs and two large decks, the lower one housing the outside bar, the upper one the restaurant.

Making my way through the crowded room, I spotted an empty seat at the bar and ordered a drink aptly named Islands of Misfits. I snorted out a laugh at how accurately it described my situation right now. Island of Misfits alright, inhabitant: 1.

I took a sip of my drink and twirled the tiny umbrella between my fingers when out of the corner of my eye, I saw someone take the seat next to me at the bar.

“Islands of Misfits, huh? Must be bad!” Looking up, I’m surprised to see that it’s Walter Skinner, my son’s principal.

“Yeah, sort of. Sorry, hello sir, it’s nice to see you!” He shakes my hand briefly and orders himself a whiskey on the rocks. Had I been a more insecure man I would’ve felt stupid for my drink choice, but as it was, if I like my drinks sweet and with a cutesy umbrella in it, then that’s what I’ll have. And don’t you dare forget the fucking umbrella!

“So Mr. Mulder, what is it, love troubles?” As a born and raised city boy I have yet to come to terms with small town frankness but I like Principal Skinner and his lack of beating around the bush.

But still, I couldn’t exactly tell him the whole truth, I don’t think he’d appreciate a Actually yes, sir, I’ve been staring at one of your teachers for every damn day of the week and when I’m not busy staring at her, I think about her all the time. I wonder if her kisses taste like strawberries and what her hair smells like. I’m driving myself slowly insane by imagining running my tongue over the spot where her neck meets her shoulder and let me tell you about the dreams I’ve been having real quick. Yeah that won’t fly.

First, he’d kick my ass into the sixth dimension and then he’d have me arrested for gross misconduct or worse, sexual harassment. Even though I’m not sure if that’s really applicable when it only takes place in your mind, it’s still inappropriate as all hell and I’m not going to test out my little theory. I don’t think I’d fare well in jail, to be honest.

So instead, I opt for a more appropriate half-version of the truth. “Yeah, sort of. I had a huge argument with my ex-wife over the phone when she was late picking our son up from school. If I had one, I think my swear jar would be able to buy me my own Island of Misfits. And what’s even worse is that I think my – our son was there to hear at least her end of the fight.” I take a miserable sip from my drink.

“I’m really sorry to hear that, Mr. Mulder. Your son’s name is Felix, right? He’s in Miss Anderson’s first grade?” Thankful for the slight change of topic, I nod.

“Yes, sir, that’s him. We got off to a rocky start but after the first week, he really loves going to school, Mr. Skinner.” The other man shakes his head and offers me his hand once again.

“Please, call me Walter. Outside of school only, of course, you understand.”

I grab his hand and give it a brief shake, smiling wryly. “Of course. I’m Fox but I make everyone call me Mulder. Even my parents. I hate my name.” He huffs out a laugh at that and I can tell that it’s a rare occasion.

“I get the feeling you’re in need of a friend on your island, Mulder not Fox.”

That I do, indeed.

Island of Maybe not such Misfits, inhabitants: 2.

Chapter 12 - A Rainbow In Its Natural Habitat

[taylizmasterpost]

TayLiz Returns (August 2011 - January 2012)

Now, Taylor’s music suggests her and Liz got back together and broke up a bunch of times. It’s kind of hard to pinpoint that exactly, since they’re on tour together constantly and can’t really have a break from each other that would be discernable by an outside source such as myself. However, this is the time for it! Time for mess! Time for fun!

9 August 2011 - Speak Now in Chicago. Taylor covers Sugar, We’re Going Down by Fall Out Boy:

The lyrics that stand out here to me are:

Is this more than you bargained for, yet? Oh don’t mind me, I’m watching you two from the closet Wishing to be the friction in your jeans Isn’t it messed up how I’m just dying to be him? I’m just a notch in your bedpost But you’re just a line in a song

Of course, once again. Taylor could just like the song. But I think it’s interesting.

10 August 2011 - Speak Now in Chicago night 2. Taylor covers I Want You to Want Me:

This one is REALLY INTERESTING in the wake of Liz’s breakup. Some choice lyrics:

I want you to want me I need you to need me I’d love you to love me I’m begging you to beg me

Oh, didn’t I, didn’t I, didn’t I see you crying? Feeling all alone without a friend, you know you feel like dying

So does Taylor want her back? Or does she just like the song? Could go either way.

16 August 2011 - Taylor goes on a Girls Trip to Charleston with Liz, Caitlin, and a few other friends. Now, in a birthday post years down the line, Liz would reveal that Taylor specifically planned this trip because Liz was having a good time (We’ll get there in Late-Stage TayLiz). This feels like healing breakup blues to me.

While there, Liz tweets about possibly sharing a bed with Taylor again:

Taylor takes some great black and white photos of everyone that will show up in a later photo blog and Liz tweets about how much she loves retro photographer Taylor:

18 August 2011 - End of Charleston trip. 

Liz tweets about Taylor healing her heartbreak blues:

That night is Speak Now in Alberta. Arm lyrics: “Find the Grace in the things you can’t change, and help somebody if you can.” Taylor covers Complicated by Carolyn Dawn Johnson:

Choice lyrics, you know the drill:

I’m so scared that the way I feel is written all over my face We used to laugh, we used to hug, the way that old friends do But now a smile and a touch of your hand makes me come unglued

I wanna hold you close, I wanna push you away I wanna make you go, I wanna make you stay

Another friend tells me that my name is always on your lips They say I’m more than just a friend, they say I must be blind Well, I’ll admit I’ve seen you watch me from the corner of your eye

What an utterly appropriate post-Charleston trip song.

19 August 2011 - Speak Now in Alberta. Arm lyrics: “Hey brother, we’re all learning to love again.” – Mat Kearny’s Learning To Love Again.

22 August 2011 - Taylor posts “The Charleston Photo blog” on MySpace, featuring pictures from the Charleston trip:

So, clearly, they had a good time.

23 August 2011 - Liz quote tweets Taylor about the Charleston photo blog:

27 August 2011 - Speak Now in LA. Taylor covers Bette Davis Eyes:

Now, not only is this an EXTREMELY GAY COVER considering it’s about how beautiful a woman is, but Bette/Betty is a popular nickname for Elizabeth. And just look at the lyrics:

And she’ll tease you And unease you All the better, just to please you She’s precocious And she knows just What it takes to make a pro blush

IS THIS NOT EXACTLY WHAT’S BEEN HAPPENING EVERY NIGHT DURING BETTER THAN REVENGE? TEASING? UNEASING? MAKING A PRO BLUSH??? Hmm, Taylor, what an interesting choice of a cover in the wake of the Charleston Trip...

It’s worth noting that Liz also grew up in the LA area, making this even more special if it is about Liz.

5 September 2011 - Taylor and Dianna Agron meet for the first time at the Fairfax Flea Market after being introduced by mutual friend, Ashley, who was working for Dianna’s hairstylist at the time. Dianna had lowkey outed herself that summer with #Shirtgate and considering all the mess going on with Liz, it’s possible Ashley (among Taylor’s other friends) were looking to introduce her to someone else.

8 September 2011 - Taylor diaries about writing Red the previous day and then recording it:

In a later interview, Taylor described Red like this:

“So this is a song that I wrote about the kind of relationship that is both the best thing and the worst thing at the same time and that’s why you can’t forget about it. It’s called Red.”

So, I have a two big theories about Taylor writing and recording Red at this point in the timeline:

1) TayLiz have IMMEDIATELY broken up again after the Charleston trip, and that’s why a mutual friend decided to introduce Taylor to Dianna.

2) Taylor and Liz are about to get back together again, and Taylor writes Red as a way of looking back on what she had with Liz back in 2009 before diving into a relationship with her again.

I’m leaning towards 2, but 1 could be true too. Who knows?

13 September 2011 - Rodarte show at NY Fashion Week. Taylor is interviewed by Vogue while there. She says there’s “just been this earth-shattering, not recent, but absolute crash and burn heartbreak” and that that’s what the next album is about. This really makes me think TayLiz breaks up IMMEDIATELY again after Charleston.

Taylor also gives these four things she’s learned about love and life recently:

Number two and four read like Jake shade to me.

16 September 2011 - Speak Now in Nashville. Taylor brings out Hayley as a special guest, they sing “That’s What You Get.” Hayley would later say she was surprised Taylor didn’t ask for Misery Business as That’s What You Get wasn’t one of their more popular songs at the time. (Keep in mind this is the song TayLiz jammed to years ago at the Paramore concert):

This song makes me think there’s a lot of back and forth happening between TayLiz right now if we look at it lyrically. However, things could be great in TayLiz land and Taylor just chose to perform this song because she knew Liz liked it.

19 September 2011 - Liz performs Jenny Turn Around with Tyler Hilton after Speak Now in Nashville. Tyler tells a story about how he went to the TS concert just before and Taylor had said that her and Liz both really love this song.

29 September 2011 - Liz tweets about crying to the song “The Heart Won’t Lie” by Vince Gill.

And thus, the back and forth continues.

16 October 2011 - Taylor recommends Liz’s YouTube channel and she gets an influx of subscribers:

30 October 2011 - Taylor diaries about being sick on tour, getting Meredith, and having written two songs in the last few days:

This usually signifies there’s a lot going on for her emotionally, although it’s hard to tell what since we don’t know which songs these are. (My best guess might be Treacherous??)

31 October 2011 - Liz tweets about getting married. 

Taylor posts a photo of her, Liz, and Caitlin on Instagram:

8 November 2011 - TayLiz have a “soul feeding time” together:

9 November 2011 -  Taylor posts a wedding dress train picture to IG with the caption “Dress train…”

12 November 2011 - TayLiz flirt more onstage during BTR:

18 November 2011 - Speak Now in Columbia South Carolina. Arm Lyrics: “Where would we be today, if I never drove that car away?” These are from the song “Don’t Think About It” by Darius Rucker. The lines before this go:

When we make choices we got to live with them Heard you found a real good man and you married him I wonder if sometimes I cross your mind Where would we be today If I never drove that car away?

To me, this plus the dress train pictures reads as Taylor’s reaction to Emily getting married the following day.

19 November 2011 - Emily gets married.  TayLiz are papped leaving a restaurant in London:

27 November 2011 - CMT Awards in Nashville. Taylor arrives with Liz and others.

1 December 2011 - Taylor shoots her vogue cover where she cuts her bangs at the Bowery Hotel. Her band (including Liz) comes to support her and her and Liz take a photo with their matching hair:

13 December 2011 - Taylor’s birthday. She’s recording something in the studio and posts a photo to tease the Red album (presumably she’s already titled it at this point).

Here are some pictures from the party:

22 December 2011 - Safe and Sound is released. TayLiz both tweet about it:

Taylor also posts about it on IG:

IN CONCLUSION: After Taylor pursuing her all summer, and Liz’s breakup with Jason, TayLiz took off again. They (maybe) shared a bed during Charleston, and Taylor certainly seems to have covered Bette Davis Eyes with her in mind. Their relationship is a little less obvious than they were in 2009, but that makes sense, considering the way Taylor has skyrocketed in popularity since then. Of course, they still are going to have some problems...

TayLiz Breaks Down (January 2012 - March 2012)

[softschofield]

i’m so perpetually frustrated with the audience members who criticise 1917 for having “no backstory or development for the characters”

like, yes, it’s subtle. because they’re friends and friends don’t talk to each other like “oh, yes, remember all these details of my life i’m conveniently and clearly reiterating for an omniscient third party?” but fuck dude, if you pay attention and know basic facts about war or do your goddam research, there is SO MUCH DETAIL TO THEIR BACKSTORIES

like, just from one TINY DETAIL, you get so much: schofield’s wounded stripe on the left sleeve of his uniform. to get a wounded stripe in world war 1, you had to be officially listed in dispatches as being a CASUALTY, not just having been in a field hospital, meaning the wound was BAD. but, wait, what kind of wound could be so well-hidden and subtle? it could be a gunshot wound or trenchfoot, but there were also two categories that could earn a soldier the wounded stripe: gas, or shellshock. it’s therefore entirely possible that he was suffering from trauma rather than a physical wound before he met blake. given that 60,000 rounds of field artillery and 45,000 rounds of heavy artillery were fired in the first DAY of fighting, and one german described the experience of the shelling as “the earth shook, the sky seemed like a boiling cauldron [...] the ability to think logically, and the feeling of gravity, both seemed to have been removed”, shellshock is a very plausible diagnosis.

so, we know he fought in the somme, and we know which battle he fought, meaning he had been at the front for at the very LEAST 7 months. SEVEN MONTHS. that is a LONG time to be in the trenches, and it is a STAGGERING amount of time to have withstood the horror and still come out of it soft, gentle, and compassionate - think on THAT when y’all say schofield is a flat character. think about what kind of a person could kill and see people killed and live in the constant, crushing, claustrophobic terror and boredom and nothing of the trenches for most likely LONGER than that and stay kind and quiet. NEED i say any the fuck more, NEXT

just from that, we then know that blake did NOT fight in the somme, meaning he arrived at the front some time after november 1916. and, judging by his excited and fearful reaction to the front line trench before a predicted push, there’s the distinct possibility he had never seen a battle, meaning his arrival can be placed after the 18th of december 1916 and that he was still deeply innocent.

if he arrived in december and the film begins on the 6th of april, that ALSO means that they had known each other at the most for just over 3 months, very possibly less, and that they had formed a very close bond in that time.

which brings me to my next point: where are their other friends? all the other soldiers are shown to have close-knit groups, so where are theirs? why is it only them? why are they even friends in the first place? why is blake, a new recruit who had only just arrived, already the same rank as a veteran who had been there for very possibly up to or more than a year? why is a veteran hanging around with a chattery, bushy-tailed, never-seen-battle replacement? why isn’t he hanging out with his own cohort of soldiers who has been there the same amount of time as him and could much more easily relate to his trauma and exhaustion? WHY is a middle-class-sounding guy even hanging around with a lower-class farmboy in the first place?

the most plausible answer? all of schofield’s friends he went through training with are dead - probably in the somme - and he’s purposefully isolated himself to grieve with his survivor’s guilt. he was most likely wounded, lonely, and agonisingly depressed for months until a cheerful replacement arrived at the front and befriended him. and THAT’S where schofield’s fanatic devotion to him comes from, and THAT’S what “he saved my life” means, more than in the literal sense - he was lost, and broken, and numb, and blake saved him.

furthermore, because boy have i got more, blake’s backstory, in case someone out there has seen this film and still wants to hit me with that fucking “we know nothing about these characters”: we know he has an older brother, we know he has a female dog called myrtle, we know they live with their mum in a farm in the countryside with a cherry orchard, and we know his father isn’t in the picture and that he most likely hasn’t been for a long, long time, judging by blake’s lack of bitterness and daddy issues, his closeness with his mother, and the fact he isn’t in blake’s family photo. we know, from interviews, that he enlisted as soon as he came of age because his brother was an officer and he idolised him, and we know he was barely this side of 18.

another thing? the story about wilko. blake knows stories about men schofield has almost certainly known for far longer - but he didn’t interact and wasn’t told, and blake did, and he was more familiar with all of them and had stories to tell that schofield would have known if he’d been sitting in the same circle when the gossip was told. how’s THAT for subtle characterisation, chumps.

and if you just think about it, there’s so much depth to blake’s overly trusting nature - because he’s still naive, he’s still innocent, he’s still young. schofield tucks the things most special or necessary away in his inside pocket, where’s it most safe, because he’s learned lessons the hard way; blake puts them carelessly in his trouser pockets where they could fall out. schofield keeps his rifle with him even as he’s going to fetch water for the german pilot; blake discards his rifle and leaves himself vulnerable. if you just LOOK, it’s all there!

FURTHERMORE, we know schofield is in his early 20s and older than blake. we know he has a much more refined accent, and we know from interviews that he’s from cookham, berkshire. we know he has two daughters and a wife (or a sister and nieces, it’s open to interpretation, go to town), we know he suffers from shellshock, we know he most likely couldn’t face going home on his last leave and instead stayed in france and gave his medal away to a french captain, we know the subject of home is deeply triggering for him, we know he refuses to talk about his daughters, we know that his family haunts him as much as he longs for it, and we know that he didn’t receive any mail from his wife - interesting, considering blake received a letter just telling him his dog was having puppies.

and don’t even get me started on the “lack of character development”. watch me scream here about that.

also, some more backstory because now i’m on a fucking roll: lance corporals were typically the second-in-commands or heads of sections, of which there were 4 within each platoon, each comprising 12 soldiers, it's likely blake and schofield were in command of different sections in the same platoon. where does that come into play? well, scho seemed to slip very easily into a position of authority when the convoy got stuck in the mud, didn’t he? MOVING ON.

more? i have more. another little tidbit: lieutenant leslie asks schofield and blake if they are his relief, and then asks when the fuck they’re getting there when they say they aren’t. he and his men are exhausted and it was said by another soldier that “they had been blown to hell a few nights ago” - they’ve clearly been at the front a long time, which, again, is interesting, considering front line soldiers were typically rotated back into reserve after 8 days. clearly, it’s been a lot longer than that, meaning order and routine have completely broken down and a new type of despair, hopelessness, and mess has taken root. there, more backstory again. 

“oh, it’s just a shitty saving private ryan” “oh, it’s definitely no all quiet on the western front”. FIRST OF ALL, it fucking IS all quiet on the western front, have you literally even read it? baumer goes to such lengths to hardly ever use the word enemy because he doesn’t view the soldiers in the other trenches as bad, just as other innocents swept up in a war that no one should be fighting. he spends a whole chapter sobbing over the only man he’s ever killed in close combat. it’s a hundred times slower than 1917 and it hasn’t even GOT a plot. what the FUCK are you talking about?

oh, and it’s just saving private ryan? show me WHERE. a bunch of soldiers have to go into enemy territory to rescue a soldier because all his brothers have been killed in action and his family wants him home. two soldiers are sent into enemy territory with a letter to stop an attack. i am LITERALLY struggling to think of any more similarities than that and even THOSE are fucking reaching.

also, it’s literally a different war. who are you and why are you saying these things to me i am BEGGING you to please use your fucking head for just a few seconds and actually THINK

“it was so convenient that the river just happened to take him to the devons” ??? “the river. it goes there” did you just entirely miss everything lauri told him? the river quite literally flows exactly past where he is supposed to go, that’s the entire POINT, that’s WHY he jumped into it, because he KNEW it would take him there, oh my GOD

“if the convoy was going exactly where he needed to go, why didn’t erinmore tell him to meet it?” i know it might be a shocking concept, but even a general may not have known exactly the route a convoy of trucks was going to take, especially in the confused wasteland the germans had left behind in their retreat. in fact, he might not have known about the convoy at all if they were coming from a different sector of the front - WHICH, guess what, THEY WERE. captain smith mentioned they crossed no man’s land just outside bapaume, which was much further south, in the old somme battlefields. scho and blake’s trench was somewhere near boyelles, 11km north of bapaume. 

“it’s unbelievable that scho would just sit quietly and relax in the convoy truck, and then get out to give orders and take command, after what he’d just been through - and, plus, he would have gotten to écoust quicker if he’d just walked” there’s this thing called trauma. shock. dissociating. compartmentalisation. just shutting down in the face of too much grief when you don’t have the time nor capacity to let yourself feel it, acknowledge it, register it. in the script, scho is said to “almost disappear into the noise of the men.” and, honestly, the emotional illusion of regaining a scrap of control over a situation he was utterly out of control of would have been enough to prompt him to get out and give orders - but as it is that wasn’t the only thing driving him: he was desperate, and an NCO, and he needed to go. AND “he would have gotten there quicker if he’d walked”?? ???????? first of all, he didn’t know that? second of all, scho said it would take them nine hours AT THE MOST to get there and, given the fact they weren’t attacking until dawn and it was most likely morning when he and blake set off, he wasn’t in a TERRIBLE rush. THIRD of all, it was a direct order from a captain. FOURTH OF ALL, do you really think he felt like walking all that way when a truck was RIGHT THERE?

“there are too many coincidences” films are built on coincidences. they are conveniently put with a character who will end up being their soulmate at the end of it all. they conveniently uncover information that would take people in real life months to find. coincidences drive stories - one of the greatest tools of screenwriting? “don’t write what would happen, write what could happen.” what could happen is that scho finds a teenage girl and an orphaned baby sheltering in a ruined town - in a war. what could happen is that a convoy of trucks heading north towards the battle of arras logically uses the road running alongside a farmhouse. what could happen is that scho jumps into a river that he knows runs east. i just don’t understand what you’re trying to say

“oooohh for soldiers on a life-or-death mission to save one of their brothers, they sure do take their time to sight-see” they’ve seen absolutely fucking nothing but the walls of a trench and the reserve camp for months. also, it’s pretty much just common sense to clear out a building before you turn your back on it and keep walking. also, they had 8 hours, scho ended up getting there in under two hours, and blake is allowed to feel more than one emotion at a time and to be excited about exploring new places, ESPECIALLY when it’s almost certain that neither he nor schofield had ever even been out of england. war or not, the french countryside was still beautiful and blake is allowed to appreciate that. next question 

“how was there a milk pail full of milk if there was no one around to milk the cow” german soldiers were stationed in the farmhouse before they got the order to move out. “they’re not long gone.” they left an hour before hand, someone probably milked the cow before they knew they were leaving. you don’t have to read the script to have a functioning braincell 

“unbelievable that they weren’t killed by the tripwire explosion” it detonated in the tunnels, not in the bunker. they wanted to collapse the escape routes first and foremost. please, i am begging you, use your head

“why did they pull an enemy out of the plane” basic human decency. i cannot believe i have to explain this concept. soldiers in the first world war were especially conscious of the humanity of the men in the other trench. you say blake had no character and then get mad when he’s shown to be so kind and selfless that he’ll burn himself rescuing a german. i don’t know what you want from me, get out of my kitchen 

“schofield was an idiot for stopping to interact with lauri and the baby” he was concussed. he knew there was somewhere he had to be but he didn’t remember what or where until he heard the church bells. also, for people who criticise the “lack of character development and backstory”, ya hate to see character building moments. it clearly wasn’t the first time he’s recited that poem to a baby. make the connection dipshits 

“the germans shot like fucking stormtroopers, how did they not hit him?” point one: one of them was blind drunk. when muller is ranting while scho is strangling baumer, he says that maybe they should head back and that maybe they won’t realise they’ve been missing. the implication? either they’ve gone AWOL, or they’re stragglers from the retreat back to the new line. either way, at least one, and very possibly all of them are off their fucking faces, considering the one by the burning church tripped over his own goddamn feet chasing scho. point two: not in a thousand years would they have expected a lone english soldier to just pop up out of nowhere in ecoust. it was so unexpected that you really can’t blame them for being flustered and confused.

“how the FUCK did the letter survive the river in one piece?” he put it in his tin. there’s literally an entire 30 seconds of the convoy scene just devoted to showing scho tucking it in there. i don’t understand how i have to say this

“it’s too gruesome” aside from the hand in the corpse and the dead horses, where? where? also, it’s the first world war. i can’t believe what i’m hearing. who are you people

“it’s not exciting enough, it’s slow, it’s dull” IT’S SUPPOSED TO SHOW THE CONSEQUENCES AND AFTERMATH OF WAR INSTED OF THE SHALLOW EXCITEMENT OF IT YOU DUNCE

in conclusion, suck my ASS anyone who says they didn’t have backstory or development or that there are ~raging plot holes~. FUCK

anyone who doesn’t want the actual soft and only good person in the world William Schofield to live a happy life in peace just isn’t valid and that’s all i’ll ever say on the matter you fucking degenerate scum rotten tomato reviewers

[allie1804-fan]

A Doorway is Opened (Chapter 2)

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 It was June 2020 and progress was being made with plans to re-open film production - Keanu would soon be heading back to Germany to continue shooting the Matrix 4.  With the lock-down restrictions on meeting friends lifting, Keanu invited Hannah to dinner at his house. He even cooked - a dish of spaghetti with prawns, fresh tomato and lemon that his sister had taught him.  This would be their first meeting in 2 months and their last in 2 months due to the shooting schedule.  

After dinner, they went through to his living room and sat on the sofa to talk through the latest draft of the script.

 “So, you’re glad I pushed you on this aren’t you? Gave you something to do in lock-down huh?”

 “Yeah OK you win”, she laughed. “I’m grateful to you for giving me the confidence to try”  

 She carried on:

 “You know these past couple of months I’ve felt like the clouds have lifted, the clouds of grief …. and I know that’s partly just time passing but it’s also thanks to you and your friendship” she spoke in an almost whisper.  When she met his gaze he was blushing again!

 “The screenplay gave me a real focus for the first time since Mark died you know other than helping the boys and just putting one foot in front of the other”

 He nodded his understanding

 “I kind of feel like a plant coming back to life after a long dark winter”

 He smiled to think he’d helped her to loosen grief’s grip on her soul.

 “I heard a theory about this before. They said that your grief is always the same, the same size and just as painful but your life grows around it and cushions the pain”

 Keanu nodded his agreement

 “For me” he said, “sometimes my grief bursts forth like an alien from my chest when I least expect it. I hope we find a way to express your concept in the movie when it’s made -  I love it so much. You have some beautiful ways of explaining grief”

 “Well like I said, that one’s not mine, it’s just one I found that really resonated with me”

 “You’re too modest”

 They looked at each other. Somehow, the atmosphere had changed with the sharing of such deep feelings. Keanu looked at her, soft brown eyes holding hers for a few moments longer than felt comfortable. Suddenly he shook his head as if a shiver went through him

 “Where are my manners, would you like some more wine”

 “I better not, I’m driving and I’ve already had one glass” she said.

 “You could always sleep over, in the spare room I mean, I mean I’m not hitting on you or anything, not that I wouldn’t want to, oh God! ……….”

 By this point, Hannah had started laughing at his befuddlement and he started to giggle as well.

 “Sorry for being such a dork – could you stay though?” he beseeched her with his eyes,  or do you need to be back for the kids?, I know I sound like I’m begging, I kind of am I guess ……….. it would just be nice to talk some more ………. I mean what with we me going away for 2 months, Facetime just isn’t the same!”

 Hannah took pity on him and placed her hand on top of his and stroked it softly

 “1 I don’t need to be back for the boys, they’re at their grandparents this week and so 2, yes I could sleep over and 3 yes please, more wine!”

 Keanu beamed and leapt up to fetch the bottle from the kitchen.

“What were we talking about before I started being a total dork?!

 Hannah chuckled “oh grief, death, our usual cheery stuff!”

 “Oh yes, of course we were, what else is there after all?!”

 A ghost of a smiled showed on Hannah’s face.

 “Do you mind telling me some more about Mark? How long were you together”

 “Wow, over 30 years   - we were just kids when we met, literally in elementary school. But we didn’t go out until I was 17, nearly 18. I guess I kind of stalked him until he caved in!  We knew we were in love about a month in I guess and we got engaged whilst at uni but married just after. I was 23 so we had been married 27 years when he died”

 “Wow you were so young to be getting married!”

 “I know right! - when I think Toby is already nearly that age, it freaks me out big time.  Anyway, I guess you almost know the rest, from the book. We were lucky in so many ways to find each other and stay in love throughout.

 A comfortable silence fell as she reflected and wondered about his romantic history. She hoped their current intimacy meant it would be OK to ask.

 “What about you? Who have been your big loves, if it’s OK to ask”

 “Sure – I mean I think I can be confident of not seeing any of this in next week’s National Enquirer! Let me see, errrrm  there was Penny. She drove with me from Toronto to LA when I left there to pursue my career.  It wasn’t exactly serious - she knew how focussed on my acting I was, but she was special, my first steady girlfriend I guess.”

Keanu then told her about a few other steady girlfriends in the 80’s and early 90s. None of them had lasted beyond a year. Film and promotional schedules often overtook his time and took him away from LA making it hard to sustain relationships.

 “And then there was Jennifer. We had a long distance thing largely as I was away filming the first Matrix not long after we hooked up. I think that added in my head to the romance of it all. Writing her letters on my little typewriter after long days on set, posting them from thousands of miles away. Once I got back to LA things felt less sure, she was never confident in us, always needing reassurance and I think she found the celebrity thing both exciting and overwhelming - like she was part way a fan, partly my lover, you know? Then she got pregnant and everything changed”

 “Oh so Jennifer was the mother of your baby, the one who died?”

 Hannah knew this one fact about him but had steered away from looking stuff up on-line about it. She counted him as a friend now so if anything was to be shared, it had to come from him.

 “Yeah, Ava’s mother. 19 years ago…….so much water under the bridge.”

 “Do you think about her often now?”

 “Who? Jen or Ava?”

 “Both I guess”

 “Yeah sometimes. You know in a sliding doors type way, especially at Christmas. That’s when we lost Ava. Christmas Eve 1999. What about you, do you think about your lost babies?”

 “Yes sometime of course …….  but I think it’s different for me. My lost babies paved the way for Josh. If they’d lived, he wouldn’t be here, so I don’t mourn them as maybe you mourn your daughter, do you see? Of course I do think of them and every Christmas we’d hang stars and angels on the tree for them. That’s how we remembered them and the pain of their loss.”

 Hannah was quiet for a few moments, remembering

 “Do you have a way, a ritual to remember Ava? Do you and your family do something to remember her?”

 “I guess they always just try to make sure I’m not alone at Christmas. That’s threatened to happen a couple of times and then Brenda or Janey or Alexandra have stepped in you know to rescue me! Stop me embodying my meme!”

 “Your meme?”

 You know, “Sad Keanu”?

 “That one must have passed me by! I’ll get the boys to explain to their boomer mom!”

 “I’m so glad you’re a boomer mum as you say and not all over it when it comes to press and internet stuff about me. It’s refreshing. Makes me feel I can be me without all that stuff informing who you think I am. Sometimes it gets in the way with new people, you know? I know I can be myself around my old old friends like Alex (he was in Bill and Ted) and Rob (he was in the band with me)

 “Wait you were in a band?”

 “Yes back in the 90s, Dogstar. Our folk thrash punk band”

 “Sounds interesting – I clearly wasn’t paying enough attention back in the 90s!”

 “Well we weren’t exactly topping the charts so that would probably explain it!”

 “Can I hear some of your stuff?”

 “Sure”

 Keanu fetched some cds and had a look through to pick a song, going for  “And I Pray”.

 “Gosh, a man of many talents” she praised “what did you play?”

 “the bass”

 “Cool”

 “wanna listen to some more music? I can hook up my phone to the speakers and we can play things on Spotify”.

 “Sure, so you’re au fait with all the new tech? I took me ages to get there and I still have loads of cds and vinyl”

 “me too   - believe me I’m generally way behind the curve with technology but my god-daughter and my kid sister both played a role in bringing me into the 21st century”

They spent the next couple of hours, huddled on the sofa, scrolling through music choices on his phone and sharing both his and her favourites as well as reminiscing about bands they’d grown up listening to and great concerts they’d been to.

 It was around 1am, with Pink Floyd’s “Wish You Were Here” softly playing that Hannah’s head lolled onto Keanu’s shoulder, the impact startling her back awake

 “sorry, sorry” she said embarrassed

 “hey no worries, you wanna go to bed now?” he asked

 “Yeah, as you saw, my eyes are closing” 

 “Come on, let’s get you set up in the guest room, I’ve got a spare t-shirt you can sleep in if you like and there’s a new toothbrush in the en-suite with your room.

 The room was a pretty one, perhaps decorated with his god-daughter in mind she thought. Once he’d shown her where things were and how to work the shower, Keanu bade her goodnight with a light kiss on her cheek. Despite being so tired, it took Hannah a good half hour to fall asleep. She touched the cheek where he’d kissed her and giggled inwardly at herself for feeling like a giddy teenager. In the past 2 months, she’d recognised her growing fondness for Keanu, putting it down to a mix of absence making the heart grow fonder and the Covid crisis making her susceptible. She’d found him very attractive way before she met him but she certainly hadn’t expected that he would reciprocate those nascent feelings. Tonight his lingering gaze as they talked about grief, his befuddlement trying to get her to stay and his soft goodnight kiss all made her wonder and maybe even hope. Tomorrow was another day.

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[holidaywishes]

not all monsters do monstrous things...

Part 4: Her Hesitation

  Summary of Series: Delly Cartwright lost her best friend, Peeta, to the games. Now, the one that took him seems to have a soft spot for her.

  Summary of Chapter: “Why am I here?” you asked, confused, your breath had become so thick that it had turned to panting. It was the only sound filling the empty space of Cato’s large marble foyer. “Snow brought you here. To stay with me. Only for a few days.” He replied “I don’t understand. Why here?” she repeated. “Because I asked him to.”

  Warning: Fluff, some angst

  Author’s Note: This one started out as a much shorter chapter but I kind of just kept writing. Again, story idea goes to Ophelia Tate of fanfiction.net fame. Eventually I’ll put like a general disclaimer somewhere but for now, here it will be. Or maybe this is where it will stay, we’ll see! Hope you enjoy :D

  masterlist

  the other masterlist

xx

Delly’s P.O.V

  Gale and Prim hadn’t spoken to you since your outburst in the Apothecary. You didn’t blame them but you couldn’t deny how awful it was making you feel, a feeling your parents soon caught on to.

  “Delly...” your father’s voice was gentle and you knew the conversation was not going to be a happy one, “your mother and I have been talking. We’re worried about you, you don’t seem like you’re regular cheery self.”

  “Dad...” you groaned, “I’m just ha--”

  “Sweetheart, we want what’s best for you. We think that... you might benefit from this facility. in District 9″

  “Facility? What kind of facility?” you whined

  “They’ll help you feel less... alone. They’ll help you grieve Peeta,” he said, trying to sound comforting but it came across as belittling, “which, quite frankly Delilah, we don’t think you’ve done.”

  “You don’t think I’ve grieved my best friend’s death?” you said angrily

  “You haven’t talked about him since it happened, Delly. You watched him jump to his death and you didn’t say anything. You cried, like the rest of us, but you haven’t said anything... to any of us. And then Gale tells us you’re defending the boy who killed him?”

  “It’s not like that,” you countered, “Gale was asleep. Delirious too! After all that Morphling and those lashes.”

  “Prim told us as well”

  “Yeah, well...” you tried but came up with nothing, “fine. But it’s still not as easy as me ‘defending’ him. I was talking to him, that’s it.”

  “That would be fine, if he weren’t as cruel as he has proven himself to be. Delly, we want our girl back. Our happy little sunflower.” He said softly, placing his hand gently on your cheek, “that is why we’ve made arrangements for you to go to this facility”

  “What?!” you shouted, “NO!”

  “Tonight” he added

  “What if I don’t want to go?” you tried, angry tears filling your eyes

  “I have to use the parent card here, Delilah”

  “Dad, please,” you begged, “don’t make me go. I’m fine. I just need a couple more days. Please..”

  “Delly...” he sighed but before either of you could say anymore to each other, the sound of heavy footsteps were stomping up your steps toward your bedroom. The familiar sound of the Peacekeepers March

  “Dad...” you sobbed, tilting your head at him

  “I’m sorry, baby girl. It’s only for a few days. I promise. They’re going to help you.” He pleaded, clearly distressed at this turn of events. You tried running but it was useless; they were too strong and too many. You kicked and screamed as they practically threw you into the Humvee that they had parked outside your father’s shoe shop, driving quickly to the train stop. When they gave you over to the person on the train, you looked back to see no one around. Not even the Peacekeepers. It was just you and the darkness in front of a train that was waiting to take you away. You sobbed as they sat you down in a small train car that was surprisingly elegant for a short trip to District 9

  “It’s alright, dear,” a high voice spoke to you but you didn’t see a face, “the ride is quicker than you think.” When you finally saw her, you were more confused than ever, what was Effie Trinket doing on this train?

  “What’s happening? Why are you here?”

  “I’m the District 12 Escort--”

  “For the games...”

  “Yes, well,” she cleared her throat as she sat across from you, “this is a special trip and I was requested to escort you to your destination.”

  “What is my destination?” you quizzed, skeptical now that you were on your way to the facility that your father spoke of

  “Why, district 9 of course!” she lied

  “No,” you said, contemplatively, “you wouldn’t be here if I were going to District 9. Am I going to the Capitol? What do they want me for?”

  “Little lady,” she tried, her voice more soothing now than the shrill tone she’d started with, “I promise, all with be made clear shortly.”

  “Why can’t you just answer me?” you begged, “please. I’m so confused and scared. No one has told me anything...” As tears rolled down your cheeks, you crumpled into the soft cushion of the booth that you were in, sitting in silence with Effie has the train shot through Panem. The trained stopped suddenly and you stood up to look out the window, trying to figure out where you were when a blindfold was thrown over your eyes causing you to scream in panic.

  “Delly, it’s alright. I’m here. Everything is fine” Effie tried to soothe you

  “Get this off of me!” you yelled

  “Stop moving!” A voice cried out

  “Don’t hurt her! You were told not to hurt her!”

  “She’s fussing!”

  “It was his only request!” You heard Effie say and you wondered who she was talking about and why he requested you not be hurt. After what felt like ages, you were brought out of a car and led up a long pathway, someone’s house? you thought to yourself, still trying to figure out where you were. The Peacekeepers rang the doorbell

  “Let her go!” Effie said and you could hear her swatting the Peacekeepers arms with her paper fan before someone answered the door, “she hasn’t been harmed. Just as you asked.” You were brought inside and set down, rather abruptly, onto a small cushioned surface, probably a bench, and waited for what would happen next.

  “Thank you” a new voice replied, sending the Peacekeepers on their way

  “You’ll be fine here, darling,” Effie reassured, her voice steady but caring in an almost maternal way, “I’ll be back in a couple of days to pick you up.”

  “Thank you, Ms. Trinket.” The voice repeated. It was familiar to you but you couldn’t quite place it because of the damn blindfold, “I’m going to remove your blindfold now. I don’t want you to panic okay?” As he lifted the blindfold from your eyes, you tried to gather your senses but were overwhelmed by the bright lights surrounding you

  “You...” you finally said when your eyes adjusted to the lights

  “I don’t believe we’ve been officially introduced,” his smile was bright and almost sweet, not like the cocky one he’d had during his interviews, “I’m Cato.”

  “Delilah... Delly,” you corrected yourself, “everyone calls me Delly.”

  “It’s nice to meet you, Delly,” he said, kneeling down in front of you “I’m sorry for how they brought you here. They didn’t hurt you did they?” You shook your head, unable to form a coherent sentence, “good. I’m glad. I asked them not to but I wasn’t sure if they’d listen. I’ve met your Peacekeepers before.”

  “Do my parents know I’m here? And not in District 9?” you finally asked

  “No” he confessed. You didn’t know what to say, your confusion was growing more by the instant. Why did your parents send you away? Why didn’t they know you were going to be here, with the victor of the 74th Hunger Games? Why? Why? Why? Why?

  “Why am I here?” you asked, confused, your breath had become so thick that it had turned to panting. It was the only sound filling the empty space of Cato’s large marble foyer

  “Snow brought you here. To stay with me. Only for a few days.” He replied

  “I don’t understand. Why here?” she repeated

  “Because I asked him to.”

xx

  “I don’t--” you began pacing around the space, trying not to get to close to you, “what do you want with me? I don’t know what kind of girl you think I am but I am not that girl...”

  “What girl is that?” he asked and you furrowed your brow, contemplating an answer

  “The girl who’s going to fall all over you just because you’re a victor..” He laughed at your remark

  “Delly,” he said, “I want to get to know you. I liked talking to you but given the circumstances, we couldn’t get to know each other. Will you please try to get to know me?”

  “I suppose..” you said hesitantly, taking his outstretched hand as he led you to the couch but you redirected to the table and he smiled before nodding understandingly.

  “So, tell me about yourself” he asked, leaning his forearms on the table

  “What do you wanna know?”

  “Everything. Anything”

  “My dad’s a shoemaker,” you said, raising the end of your sentence as if you weren’t sure if it was interesting enough, “he tried to teach me how to cobble shoes when I was like 8. He thought it would be useful but I was horribly clumsy and kept hitting my fingers with the hammer...”

  “I bet the customers love coming to the store to talk to you” he smiled and you blushed, shaking your head to yourself

  “We don’t get too many customers these days.” You stated plainly, thinking about how the last time you actually made a new pair of shoes was for Gale’s little brother on his first day of elementary school, “it’s too much of a luxury for most of the district.”

  “Oh,” he said, straightening his posture before continuing, “well.. what about your childhood?” He asked, changing the subject, and you wondered how much you should say, considering almost everything revolved around Peeta

  “Uhm..” you hesitated, “it was pretty normal. As normal as it can be I guess, I have a younger brother so he was always kinda hanging around. I made friends easily because I always smiled at people. Peeta was the first boy that ever talked to me...” As soon as you said his name, you looked down at your lap and Cato tried to change the subject

  “I’m sorry... I shouldn’t ha--”

  “No, it’s okay..” you interrupted, “I should talk about him. He was my best friend and his death is the whole reason my parents sent me away right?” you laughed uncomfortably

  “You don’t have to”

  “It’s okay,” you smiled as you looked up at him, “I met Peeta when I was maybe 6 and he was drawing with chalk outside of the Bakery. He was drawing these beautiful flowers that I had never seen in nature before, when I asked him what they were he said he’d only seen them once -- during a broadcast of the Games. I said they were such a bright blue and his drawing really made me feel like they were really there. He smiled at me, said in a higher voice than you’d remember it, ‘Hi I’m Peeta.’ After that, he became the centre of my world...” Cato frowned as you spoke but you smiled as you recalled your memories with the boy you loved and lost, “I remember one time, when we were 13, 3 years ago now. We hadn’t seen the sun in nearly a year. The sky was always shrouded with Coal dust but for some reason the sun was so bright this day that it cut through everything. Peeta and I spent the entire day in the street, letting the sun soak into our skin. It wasn’t until the end of the day that we realized the sun had practically dyed his hair!” You laughed, for the first time in a long time, “he went from a dusty blonde, almost brown colour to the little blonde baker’s son.”

  “You really loved him” Cato said

  “I did. I always thought that we’d grow old together. Maybe get married, have a kid. People expected it of us. But I knew,” you added, “that he didn’t feel the same. I knew he always loved Katniss and he would’ve done anything for her.”

  “So it was true? Their love story?” he asked, sitting back in his chair

  “Not entirely. Not the way they explained it, I mean,” you corrected, “Peeta loved Katniss, his crush on her was all he’d ever known. That much was true. But Katniss... I think she cared about him. He was easy to grow attached to, so I think she could’ve fallen in love with him but I don’t think she was in love with him during the Games. It was all just too sudden. And she had Gale back home...”

  “Her cousin?”

  “Cousin? No that was just a story, to make the star-crossed lovers thing seem more real. Gale and her were... hunting partners. They were like me and Peeta, they grew up together.” You could see thoughts racing through his mind and you could only imagine that they were guilt-ridden, “I don’t blame you. I know I probably should because if you hadn’t fought with Katniss and thrown her to the mutts, Peeta might still be here, right? That’s what everyone tells me. That’s what everyone would have me believe. But I knew Peeta.”

  “What do you mean?” he quizzed and you smirked to yourself before propping an elbow on the table and resting your head in your hand

  “If Katniss died, what would Peeta have to come back to? A girl he didn’t love who lived across the street from him? Two brothers who wouldn’t have gained any more respect for him even though he’d won the games? A mother who got angry with him at every little thing and had no faith he’d win in the first place?” you rambled, “I loved Peeta but I knew what his life was like here. He didn’t want to die, nobody does, but he always had Katniss to brighten up his day. To give him something to look forward to. Without her, what was the point?”

  “He was always going to jump...” he said quietly

  “Or poison himself or surrender... he was never going to leave that arena without her. I knew that. I said goodbye to him long before he faced you on the Cornucopia that day.”

  “I’m sorry,” he said, looking down at his lap, “I don’t think I’ll ever not be sorry.” You watched him for a few moments, twiddling his thumbs back and forth, not making eye contact with you; you smiled to yourself.

  “What about you?” you said, “what do I need to know?”

  “I think you probably already know more than you need to about me” he smirked

  “Those interviews are all about showmanship. Who are you really?”

  “I’m a Career Tribute. I trained until I was 18 and then I volunteered with my childhood friend..”

  “No,” you stopped him, “tell me something real. Something true.”

  “My favourite colour is red”

  “Like the colour of blood?” you asked, pinching your eyebrows together

  “No, no,” he scoffed, stretching his arms back on the table, “more like a poppy. That bright red.. What else do you want to know?”

  “How about... your childhood?” you asked

  “I’m a Career Tribute. I trained every day until I wa--” he started to repeat, forcing you to laugh and interrupt him again

  “Fine fine, okay!” you giggled, catching him smile before you let your eyes wander as you thought about your next question, “can you tell me about her?” You were hesitant to even ask, knowing the pain that you had when you remembered Peeta, but you wanted to know how he felt about her.

  “Clove and I grew up together,” he said, knowing that you were talking about the girl he’d lost in the games, “She was two years younger than I me but she was... talented with those knives of hers. She was fast and she was brutal. So, everyone agreed to let her volunteer before the rest of us. Aside from that she was smart and funny; It was always easy to just sit in a room and talk with her until the sun came up.” He spoke with such a grin on his face, you couldn’t help but smile, “our families used to get together at the end of every training year, before the Games, and have these huge Firework displays. It was their way of congratulating themselves on what they’d done. Anyway, one year, Clove stole half of the fireworks and didn’t tell me but we went to a party at a friends house and she busts out these giant fireworks and runs to the yard to light them up.”

  “If you loved her... why didn’t you--”

  “I wanted to run to her,” he answered, knowing your question, “but I was hurt and too far away. By the time I heard her call for me, I was too late. I called out to her and she didn’t hear me. Plus, if I had run to her, even after she’d been hit, I would’ve been seen as weak. I couldn’t save her. There was no point in showing Panem that I would cry over her, not with the image I’d created for myself. I needed to avenge her.”

  “Because you loved her”

  “I cared for her. Love was a weakness I couldn’t afford” his tone changed quickly and you got nervous about what his reaction might be to any more questions, especially about Clove.

  “I’m tired,” you said, “where should I sleep tonight?” He stood up and led you to a guest room that spanned almost two of your bedrooms and you gasped at the sight of it

  “I hope you’ll be okay in here.”

  “Are you kidding?” you scoffed, a smile on your face that you couldn’t hide, “I think I’ll be just fine in here.”

  “Goodnight, Delly.” He said but before he could walk away, you stopped him. This whole night had been a lot to take in and you weren’t sure how to feel about him asking for you to be brought here; you could tell he had a temper and you weren’t sure what would set him off but still, there was something about him that you were sure you could connect to.

  “Goodnight, Cato” you said as you propped yourself on the tips of your toes to kiss his cheek softly, squeezing his hand as you steadied yourself back on the ground, noticing a blush creep across his cheeks as he closed the door.

[the-cat-at-the-theatre-door]

Tagged forever ago by @tuggoffelees-is-canon (sorry it’s taken me so long to get to it. I don’t have much to say about myself that’s interesting)

Some random facts about me:

1. I speak Italian and English fluently, understand two different Italian dialects, read it okay, but I cannot write in Italian (My spelling is really REALLY bad).

2. I was online schooled during the entirety of my high school career

3.  I have an HBA and Masters degree in English Literature. That’s a total of six years in university. My mind works better analytically than it does creatively. 

4. I work(ed? it’s hard to talk in the present tense considering the situation atm) as a contract lecturer teaching Engineering students how to write academically at the university level, and as a secretary. 

5. I still have one of my baby canine teeth, and it seems to be permanently fused since the adult one is still up in my palette. 

6. I refused to swear in conversation or online until I got to university. Now it is part of my everyday vocabulary. 

7. I have perfect turn out. I didn’t have to do anything special, it’s just the way my hips are aligned. As in, when I get into frog position, my knees automatically hit the floor, when I’m in first position/second/etc. my feet are near parallel to one another. 

8. I danced from age 2 until age 13 (Dance is actually how I was first introduced to CATS, fun fact, many many moons ago)

9. I’ve never dyed my hair, but I have had it both very very long (to my thighs) and very very short (pixie cut).

10. I collect and restore dolls as a hobby. 

11. I’ve sat through two extended back to back showings of the LotR trilogy in theatres, which says a lot about me as a person.

12.  When I was little, a woman tripped over me in a Claire’s causing me to bash my head into a shelf and split the upper part of my ear cartilage open. As a result, the top of one ear shell has a thick scar and healed flatter. 

13. I thought the name “Isabel” was pronounced “I-say-bell” for the longest time. I found out I was wrong when I read a street sign out loud and my cousin laughed at me. 

14. I don’t like eating chocolate unless it has almonds or hazelnuts in it. (I’m not really a sweet things person in general, actually)

15. I have a corner in my room that has all my CATS things on display. I like keeping my collections organized into sections. 

16. When I was two years old, I would beg my mom to put on the PotO soundtrack and play the title song literally every day. She said that I would just stand near the tape deck for the entire song, listening quietly until it was over and I asked her to play it again. 

17. I am afraid of clowns

18. I am double-jointed, but only in my left thumb

Annnnnd I can’t think of two more D: (I’m no good at talking about myself. I am probably the most boring person you will ever meet). I’m no good at tagging, so please feel free to do this if you want!

[basketofverbiage]

Candy and Tradition

So, I decided to challenge myself to write and post 25 drabbles between now and Christmas. Here is the first (also, all the recipes listed are real things my family makes, so if you are curious about them, let me know and I can post some of them)!

For 90% of the year, Y/n was perfectly happy with her life in Seoul. While she did get a little bit homesick from time to time, her beautiful boyfriends made everything better on those days. Namjoon and Jungkook were the perfect mix of brains and brawn, art and sport, sweet and spicy, and kept life interesting enough that Y/n really didn’t miss her home country. However, the 10% of the time where homesickness was paramount was the holiday season. Since she grew up in America, Y/n’s family all celebrated Thanksgiving, and she’d grown used to not being able to do the same in Korea. Her family had never been traditional about the turkey and all the trimmings, so that part was easily displaced for Y/n. In fact, one year, her family had had a taco bar instead; however, the tradition that they kept without fail was that the entire family came together the Saturday after Thanksgiving to make homemade candy of all varieties. While other families baked Christmas cookies together, Y/n’s family spent 8-12 hours making all kinds of confections; if it wasn’t nailed down, it got covered in chocolate that day.

Y/n usually would fly home for a few days to participate in the candy making festivities, but this year it just wasn’t feasible due to her work schedule. Her family was okay with it, and her mom had promised to video call her so that she could see her nieces and nephews experience the day for the first time, but it just wasn’t the same. So, when the week of Thanksgiving came, Namjoon and Jungkook noticed how upset she was becoming.

“Hyung, we need to do something to help Noona. She’s so sad about not seeing her family,” Jungkook told Namjoon as he brought the elder a cup of coffee to his studio.

Namjoon accepted the steaming cup of coffee with a tender kiss to the younger’s lips before speaking. “I know. I’ve been thinking about it all morning and I think I have a solution. What if we call and get some of Y/n’s favorite recipes from her mom and we have our own candy making day here in Seoul? We have this weekend off for a change, and maybe Jin-hyung would be okay with us taking over the kitchen for the day.”

“I’m sure he would because he’d get to eat some of the things we make,” Jungkook said thoughtfully. “When can we call for those recipes? It might be hard to get some of the ingredients so we might have to overnight them from online.”

“I’ll reach out by text since it’s the middle of the night there. Maybe we can tell Y/n that we can’t come over to her apartment tonight because something came up here, and we can stay late here and video chat her then.”

After getting a goodbye kiss for the road, Jungkook headed off to record some vocals for their new album. He felt a bit better now that he had a plan in place to cheer up their girlfriend, and he knew that she’d love the surprise. He’d loved Namjoon since he was 15 but was still amazed at how intuitive the man was and how quickly he could come up with a solution to nearly any problem. He trusted that Namjoon would let him know when their important call was, so he threw himself into his work to finish in plenty of time.

Y/n’s mother was a morning person and responded excitedly at 5 am her own time and scheduled a time to call the boys. They would call her at 10 pm KST; it would still be morning for Y/n’s mom, but it would give her time to get some recipes together. She wanted to scan them in and email them to Namjoon.

Jungkook knew that Namjoon would probably work on music right up until the call, so he called Y/n himself.

“Hello, my Love!” she answered.

“Hi Noona. Have you had a good day at work today?” he asked through the biggest smile. Just hearing her voice squeezed his heart in the best way.

“Oh, you know. It’s been work,” she giggled. “Have my amazing boyfriends been working hard?”

“Yeah, we have. And that’s part of why I called. Something has come up, and we won’t be able to come over tonight, Noona. We have to re-record all over our vocals for 3 songs. The computer they were on crashed and the vocals were lost, so we have to stay late to catch back up. I know you have to work tomorrow, and we don’t want you to stay up too late waiting on us. I don’t know what time we will be finished.”

Jungkook felt guilty lying to one of the loves of his life, but hopefully the surprise they were coordinating would make up for it. It tugged his heartstrings at the way she sounded so sad not to see them.

“I’m so sorry, Noona. We will make it up to you this weekend when we are off,” Jungkook promised.

After talking for a few more minutes, Jungkook made Y/n promise to text him when she got home safely after work so that he could order dinner to be delivered to her. Even if they weren’t physically going to be there, he could make sure that she ate well. He pondered over their plan a bit more as he returned to Namjoon’s studio.

“I talked to Noona. I told her we had to re-record all the vocals for like 3 songs so we wouldn’t be over. We should tell the others so if she asks they will play along until Saturday,” Jungkook told him. “I hated lying to her.”

“I know. I talked to her earlier today after we heard back from her mom, and I couldn’t bring myself to tell her we couldn’t come, so I’m glad you did. When I tried, my voice just stopped,” Namjoon replied.

They curled up on the sofa in the studio and ordered dinner for themselves as well as dinner for Y/n once she arrived home. After they ate, Jungkook curled up into Namjoon’s arms for a bit, just loving the warmth and love radiating off of him. The recipes that Y/n’s mom had emailed came through, so they looked them over and started a grocery list. All the recipes had either standard names or weird Christmasy names; Jungkook didn’t have any idea what the hell an Elf Bite was, but it sounded super good. Y/n’s mom called right on schedule and let them know that if they needed her to she could ship some of the ingredients that they might not be able to find in Korea from America. Namjoon pre-paid the postage for a package since they figured even sending a package second day from America would be expensive and since this was their idea, they wanted to cover the cost of everything.

“Boys, you have to have someone record her reaction to this for me please. I know we were a bit hesitant about your relationship at first, but I’m so happy you found my little girl. You are both wonderful for her,” Y/n’s mom said to Namjoon and Jungkook before ending the call. “You really do bring so much light and love into her world. Thank you for doing this for her.”

The next few days were a whirlwind as the boys worked hard and also spent a lot of time searching out the rest of the ingredients that they needed. Y/n mom had shipped nearly everything they needed for a few of the recipes, and with the help of some of the staff, they were able to get everything together. Jin helped hide everything in the dorm and was wholeheartedly supportive of their endeavor. So much so that he offered to help with the plan.

Namjoon and Jungkook were going to get everything out and get started on the peanut butter ball recipe that Y/n’s mom had sent. She had been very specific about how some of the ingredients couldn’t be measured, but that Y/n would just know if it was right by taste. Jin was going to call Y/n at 6 am on Saturday morning and beg her to come over. He was going to say that he was trying to make waffles and he just couldn’t figure out what was going wrong and beg her to come help him. Y/n loved to cook and to share her recipes with others, and this wouldn’t be the first time that Jin called her at a random time of the day begging for her help in recreating something they had eaten in America. Hopefully, by the time Namjoon and Jungkook had stumbled through the first part of the unfamiliar recipe, Y/n would be there to make the special adjustments to make the recipe complete.

They had stayed at the dorm Friday night so that they would be in place to spring their surprise. Y/n had had to work late so it worked out all around. Once they had showered after dance practice that day, they curled up in Namjoon’s bed and facetimed their girl. She looked so sad and tired, but Jungkook hoped that the next day would lift some of that sadness. Jungkook slept wrapped around Namjoon, their bare chests pressed together, until their alarm went off. At 5 am, Namjoon and Jungkook were sleepily getting ready for their day. Jungkook felt like he had barely slept from his anxiety that they would fail at the surprise, but it was go time. Jungkook made coffee and a light breakfast for them while Namjoon got dressed.

Namjoon came down the hall with Seokjin following behind. They were talking quietly amongst themselves as Jungkook put eggs and toast onto 3 plates and poured three cups of coffee.

“Are you guys ready for this?” Jin asked between bites of eggs.

“Yes, hyung,” Namjoon smiled softy. “Call our baby over.”

Nearly 30 minutes later, Y/n finally arrived. They had left the door unlocked so she could get in with no issues.

“Jinnie?” she called softly as she removed her shoes.

“In here, Y/n,” Jin called from the kitchen.

When Y/n rounded the corner into the kitchen, her mouth dropped open. Seokjin was standing against the back countertop with his phone raised, filming her reaction. Namjoon had both hands buried in a bowl, with powdered sugar streaked up his cheek. Jungkook was laughing as he stirred something in a bowl placed over a boiling pot while still watching Namjoon struggle.

“We’re not making waffles, are we?” she finally gasped out.

Jungkook turned off the eye of the cooktop before coming over and wrapping her in his arms. “No, Noona, we’re not making waffles. We know you were so sad you couldn’t be with your family for making candy with them. So we talked to your mom, and brought candy making to you. Your mom even shipped some ingredients from America for us.”

“Um…my loves, I hate to interrupt this beautiful moment, but I have no idea what I’m doing. Please help me,” Namjoon whined.

After she finally recovered from the shock, Y/n jumped right into showing the loves of her life and her best friend how to make the recipe that her grandmother showed her how to make as a toddler. No one was surprise when Namjoon dropped the first peanut butter ball he dipped in melted chocolate onto the floor while Jungkook lived up to his golden maknae nickname by making a peanut butter ball that was perfectly dipped and looked better than Y/n’s example. As time went on, the other members started getting out of bed and following the smell of peanut butter and chocolate until the entire group was standing around in various states of dress, rolling dough into balls and dipping into chocolate. Even Yoongi got into it.

They made so many different recipes of candy. Y/n’s mom had sent over several different recipes: Mounds balls, peanut butter balls, peanut butter Elf Bites, S’mores balls, chocolate covered pretzels, turtles, and peppermint bark. Half of the group was nearly sick from all the sugar, so they ordered pizza. Everyone else took turns in the shower while Y/n, Namjoon, and Jungkook curled up on the couch together. Y/n was sitting in Jungkook’s lap with her legs draped over Namjoon’s gorgeous thighs.

“Thank you both so much for today. I can’t explain how much this means to me,” she murmured to them through tears. “It made me feel less like I was a thousand miles from my family. It was so amazing that you were able to make my family’s recipes with me. Some time it would be amazing to merge the two, but even if that can never happen, I feel like it will be okay. The world won’t end if we start our own traditions here in Seoul.”

[marshmallow-phd]

Sculpted Raven

Part of The Untamed - EXO Wolf Universe

Genre: Supernatural, Wolf Au

Pairing: Chanyeol x Reader

Summary: It had been just you and your brother for the longest time and that’s how you liked it. Politics and lies had drove you away from your home five years ago and that has since left a bitter taste in your mouth. While exploring the latest town you’d settled in, you met Chanyeol. He was everything you didn’t want: goofy, happy-go-lucky… a wolf. Mate pull or not, you were going to try everything you could avoid him while keeping the secret from your brother. But how long would you be able to fight? Will Chanyeol be able to pull you back into the world you swore you would never enter again?

Part: 1 I 2 I 3 I 4 I 5 I 6 I 7 I 8 I 9 I 10 I 11 I 12 I 13 I 14 I Final

**

Lon frowned. “Um… what?”

You swallowed to try and relieve your dry throat. It didn’t help much. “I think we should just pack up and go to Mom. She needs us. I want to be there for her.”

While you didn’t expect your brother to start jumping up and down and filling up his suitcase, you hadn’t been prepared for his harsh reply.

“(y/n), we already discussed this,” he huffed. “We’re staying here. If you want to go visit Mom, that’s fine. I’ll ask Kris for a few days off, but we’re not dropping everything here.”

“No. We didn’t discuss it,” you argued. “You decided on this place. You decided to come here. Just like you always do. I’ve never had a say. I’ve only ever followed you because I trust you. But, please, listen to me this one time. Let’s leave and go to Mom.”

“Why do you want to leave so badly?” Lon questioned. “I mean, yeah, that idiot attacked me, but Kris has my back. I’ve got a good job here. We can stay here as long as we need to. And do you really want to be stuck around Markus forever?”

Of course you didn’t. But considering the fact that you just told your mate that there was no chance of you ever accepting him, you needed to get away. You needed to get out. You needed to leave this place before you crawled back to him, begging for forgiveness. The way Chanyeol looked at you as he shouted for you to leave… That was what truly made you break down. The anger, the hurt… the betrayal….

If someone had asked you if Chanyeol was capable of any facial expression that wasn’t that lopsided grin or a pinched, cute look of confusion with pouting lips, you would have firmly said no. Even after all the times you’d lashed out and been mean to him, he still smiled through it all like an idiot. The thought of doing something to try and make that grin come back was sitting in the corner of your mind like a ghost. Or maybe more like an executioner silently sharpening his ax. If you gave in to the urge, you were a goner.

“Listen,” Lon sighed. “I can’t get tomorrow off, but I can see if Kris will give me a long weekend. We can drive up, stay with Mom for a few days, and come back. Deal?”

No. It wasn’t not what you wanted. It wasn’t the permanent resettlement that you’d hoped for.

But it would have to do for now. Maybe once he was back with Mom, Lon would change his mind. Maybe the idea of all of them being together again would be too hard to resist. There was always hope.

“Okay,” you agreed reluctantly. “I can live with that.”

Lon smiled at you. “Good. Now, what’s for dinner?”

Rolling your eyes, you shuffled into the kitchen to see what you could throw together.

**

There was one treat your mother always made for you when you were kids. It was your favorite thing in the world, even with how simply it may have seemed to everyone else. You could have even only that treat for the rest of your life and nothing else. No one could make them like your mom. Who else added the special ingredient of love into the mix?

Okay, so it was cheesy as hell, but when your mom told you that secret to her recipe and then gave you a wink, you couldn’t help but laugh, even as a teenager eating the frosting as you sat on the counter.

Even though the bakery you were currently headed to didn’t make their chocolate cake lollipops with Mom’s love, you still thought it might be a nice surprise for her when you showed up. Besides randomly showing up as an answer to her letter.

In many ways, Chanyeol was a lot like your mother.

Both of them preferred to look on the bright side of things, to keep a positive perspective even on hopeless situations. Your mother had constantly told you that your father would be all right, even when you knew the trial would have only one possible outcome. She’d still kept a smile on her face up until the end.

The bell above the door chimed as you entered the bakery. Heat filled the closed in space thanks to many ovens creating delicious smelling goods in the back. A girl around your age was manning the front counter. A small, shy smile pulled on the corners on her lips as she looked up from whatever she was sketching.

“Hi, how can I-” she stopped when she met your gaze. The smile was wiped from her face and after a few blinks, she tried again. “How can I help you?”

Confused and feeling awkward, you stuffed one of your hands into your jacket pocket as you pointed towards the display case. “Can I just get about half a dozen of those chocolate lollipops?”

She nodded. “Sure.”

Silently, she wrapped up the individual pops before gently placing them in a clear plastic bag.

“That’ll be twelve-fifty-eight.”

You handed over your card and waited for the transaction to be finished out. You weren’t sure as to why the girl was being extra awkward with you and you just wanted to high tail it out of there. But then you saw her scar.

It came up about halfway up her neck, curved and slightly raggedy. You knew exactly what it was.

“You’re one of them, aren’t you?” you asked before you could stop yourself.

Gasping, the girl’s hand flew up to cover the scar. But you didn’t move or leave or even apologize. You simply waited. Slowly, the girl removed her hand, nodding.

“Yes, I am.”

You nodded back, although it was more like a weird bob than a nod. “You must be happy, then.”

“I am,” she confirmed. “A lot happier than I was before.”

A snort escaped. “Yeah, those hormones will do that to you.”

“That’s not why I’m happier,” she snapped, actually making you jump back. “Maybe you should give Chanyeol a chance.”

Shaking your head, you scoffed, “Look, you don’t know my reasons–”

“No, I don’t,” she interrupted. “But I also had my reasons. In the beginning, I didn’t want anything to do with Kyungsoo. But he is the best thing that happened to me. Not because of destiny or whatever it is that draws us to our mates. But because he helped me see a better version of myself.” She looked up at you with a half-smile. “Chanyeol’s a good guy. One of the best in the pack. And the pull has a way of bring us to the person that we need most in the world.”

You cleared your throat uncomfortably. Because she was hitting a few cords with you. Some very sensitive cords. You knew Chanyeol really deserved a happy-go-lucky, giggly-type girl, but he got stuck with you instead. And yet, he still look at you like the very stars shined in your eyes.

“I’ll, um… I’ll keep that in mind.”

The girl tapped her pencil against the counter. “I’m sorry. They all told us not to get involved. And I planned on that, but….”

“It’s okay. I get it,” you reassured her. Then you held out your hand. “I’m (y/n), by the way.”

She took it, the smile growing in size. “Dana.”

“It was nice to meet you, Dana,” you said honestly. Holding up the bag, you joked, “If these are as good as my mom’s, you’ll be seeing me more often.”

Dana nodded. “I hope so.”

Waving goodbye, you walked out of the store, feeling the weight on your shoulders grow in size. You really needed to see your mom.

**

“Are you sure this was a good idea?” Baekhyun asked for the millionth time.

Chanyeol punched him in the shoulder as he rinsed his hair out under the faucet. He honestly probably should have let a professional do this. Oh, well. If it looks bad, he’ll just shave it and grow it out again. That was the great thing about hair. He could always start over.

“I think this is a sign he needs to seek professional help,” Tao mumbled.

Sehun snorted. “Oh, yeah, that’s a good idea. ‘Tell me, Chanyeol, what’s bothering you?’ ‘Well, you see, doctor, I’m a werewolf and my mate has basically rejected me so now I’m going through an identity crisis and have now dyed my hair.”

Tao scrunched up his face. “Ha ha ha.”

“Ha ha ha,” Sehun mocked.

“Both of you shut up,” Chanyeol grumbled. Turning off the faucet, he rung out most of the water from his hair and grabbed a towel to dry the rest. When he thought he’d gotten it mostly dry, he removed the towel and prepaid himself to look in the mirror.

“You know,” Baekhyun crunch on a mouthful of popcorn from the tiny bowl he was holding, “it’s not that bad, actually.”

“Yeah,” Tao agreed. “But why gray? Why not blonde or bright red?”

“I think it’s more silver, actually,” Sehun corrected.

Chanyeol turned towards the mirror, admiring the fresh, new color.

He wasn’t the first to dye his hair in the pack. Sehun kept his a steady blonde while both Baekhyun and Minseok had experimented with several different colors and shades. Even Junmyeon had played with a few interesting colors in his pre-professor days. Who could forget the pink hair he sported for a while during his junior year? The fact that he actually pulled it off and made it look somewhat cool was still mind boggling to this day.

But now it was Chanyeol’s turn. And, by a miracle, it actually worked out. Even unstyled, the silvery white color looked cool. It made him feel different, too. Not so much the goofball reputation that he was stamp with, but more tough. Someone who could stand next to you and look like he belonged.

No. That was not why he was doing this. He was doing this because he needed a change, a distraction. As far as you were concerned, he could die in a ditch. Which, considering you told him there was no way in hell you would ever accept being his mate, was pretty much the only outcome he could see. Might as well live life the fullest while he could, right?

“So, what’s next?” Sehun teased. “A tattoo?”

Chanyeol smirked. “Actually,” he checked the watch on his wrist, “I’ve got about an appointment in about two hours. I should change and head there soon.”

He only took two steps towards the door out of Junmyeon’s master bath before the pain hit. It was like someone was stabbing him in the chest with a white hot iron poker. And then twisting it around for good measure.

With a hard landing, Chanyeol fell to his knees, clutching his chest. Yells and hisses escaped from him in a pathetic attempt to scare away the pain.

“Junmyeon!” Baekhyun and Sehun cried.

At the same time, Tao yelled, “Kris!”

Both leaders came running into the bathroom at the same time. They both knelt down, holding onto Chanyeol and trying to figure out what was going on as they simultaneously asked, “What happened?”

“I don’t know,” Tao whimpered.

“He just collapsed to the ground,” Baekhyun said in a panicked voice. “One second he was fine and then next….”

“It must be (y/n),” Kris concluded. “She’s still rejecting him.”

“That’s already painful enough,” Chanyeol coughed. “Why do they have to add this on top of it?”

“Cause life’s a bitch,” Kris replied. That actually made Chanyeol laugh through the pain.

Just as quickly as the aching sensation came, it subsided. Able to breathe normally again, Chanyeol pushed himself up to his feet.

“Chanyeol, are you alright?” Junmyeon asked. His face was pinched and wrinkled with worry. If he wasn’t careful, with everything going on at the moment, his face was going to freeze in that position permanently.

Plastering on a smile, Chanyeol nodded. “I’m fine. I’m going to go change now.”

He left the others behind in the bathroom and left Junmyeon’s room all together. But he didn’t head for his own room to change like he said. Knowing his brothers like the back of his hand, he hung around in the hallway, leaning against the wall, the fake smile now gone from his lips.

“He’s not really going to die, is he?” Baekhyun asked, none of his usual jokiness in his voice. “That’s just a myth, right?”

“It’s not a myth,” Kris confirmed. “If she truly rejects him, Chanyeol won’t last long.”

“Why do our lives have to be so connected to theirs?” Tao complained.

Chanyeol couldn’t really blame him. It did seem really unfair. If the mate rejected the wolf, the mate still got to go on and live their life while the wolf wallowed in agony until the pain became too much and they died.

Why couldn’t you see that he didn’t ask for this either?

Okay, so he did actually ask for it. He asked for it every time he saw his brothers with their own mates. He asked for it when he saw how happy they looked, how in love they were. But he didn’t ask for it to be you specifically. He would have been happy with anyone. The shy girl from his history class. Or the really pretty girl who always took his order at the diner where he often ate lunch.

In the end, though, it was you.

What could make you hate the idea of wolves and mates so much?

Sure, your brother was an omega, but Kris said he was never kicked out of a pack. He just simply chose not to. So where did all this hostility come from?

Well, two could play at that game. Whether or not death was coming for him, he could be just as unattached as you. See how you liked it then.

“It’s just the way it is,” Junmyeon replied to Tao solemnly.

“It’s complete shit, that’s what it is,” Kris growled.

“We can’t exactly force her to accept him, Kris,” Junmyeon sighed.

“I know. But it never should have been Chanyeol.”

“Then who should it have been?”

“Preferably none of us,” Kris snapped. “I would have preferred if the fates just left us all alone and let us make our own damn decisions.”

Chanyeol slid down to the floor. Kris was right. Life would have been much easier if the fates above could just leave them to their own devices. Chanyeol didn’t think his choice in mate would be that bad.

Stomps alerted him to someone approaching, but he didn’t have the energy to care or move.

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” Kris sighed above him.

Chanyeol looked up at his hyung.

“I don’t want to die,” he confessed.

“You won’t die,” Kris promised. “I won’t let that happen. We’ll get her to come around. I don’t care if we have to kidnap her to do it.”

An angry growl erupted from Junmyeon’s bathroom.

“I was kidding,” Kris called over his shoulder. He looked down at Chanyeol and mouthed, “No, I’m not.”

To his surprise, Chanyeol actually chuckled. No, he would never kidnap you or force you into anything, just like he knew Kris never would either. But he appreciated the joke.

Kris held out his hand. “Come on. We’ve got an appointment to get to.”

“We?” Chanyeol echoed as he took the hand and let the alpha pull him to his feet.

“I’ve been thinking about getting another one for a while.” With a soft laugh, Kris pulled up the left sleeve of his plaid shirt until his under arm was visible, showing off black script.

If you can’t live longer, live deeper

“So, it is possible,” Chanyeol grinned.

Letting his sleeve go, Kris laughed. “Yeah, it’s a tattoo. Why wouldn’t it be possible?”

“Sehun said it might not be possible since we heal so fast.”

Kris shook his head. “Not that fast. The needle does its work before your skin has time to heal up.” He clapped Chanyeol on the back. “Come on. Let’s get you changed and head out. Even if it’s for a few hours, let’s take your mind off of the dreary crap.”

Chanyeol scrambled to his room to quickly put on fresh clothes. If he’d been happy at the return of Kris and the others when they first arrived, now, he couldn’t be more elated to have a brother like Kris. When everyone else focused on the negative, Kris was about ignoring it for a while. Maybe after the appointment, they could go get a few drinks.

[tsukihoshi14]

Spin The Dream - Yuzuru Hanyu (part 1)

This is a two-part special feature done by Goto Taisuke, Asahi Digital about Yuzuru’s skating career. They are both beautifully done, so I highly recommend you to go through both slide shows: first feature (Dec 2017), second feature (Feb 2018).

The first feature focuses on Yuzuru’s skating career and people involved early in his skating career while the second one puts an emphasis on his senior years. I really like this first feature as it really highlights all the support that Yuzuru has been receiving ever since he was a child, with mentions of people we may never hear about anywhere else such as coach Mami Yamada, Yutaka Higuchi-san. Reading this, I can really understand how the support from so many people helped shape Yuzuru’s career and why he's so grateful for them.

I’ve done the translation of the second feature here if anyone’s interested. Below is my translation of the first feature. Enjoy! :D

                   「SPIN THE DREAM - YUZURU HANYU」

(Slide 1)

Caption: Reaching that stage once again with the support from many people

(Slide 2) Title: Spin the Dream - Yuzuru Hanyu

(Slide 3)

Caption: He touched the ice after a practice session 10.19.2017

(Slide 4)

Yuzuru Hanyu always bows very deeply. Before stepping onto the ice or leaving the ice, he'd touch it. There were also times where he looked at the ceiling and muttered "I'm sorry" after having a bad performance.

"I'm not sure since when I've been doing it. I think I've gradually been doing it more and more. A lot of things came to me, and I was supported a lot too."

Hanyu puts into his routine the thoughts he has for his coaches, his family and predecessors in the Japanese skating world.

(Slide 5)

Title: 4 YEARS OLD -1998: THE TROUBLESOME PRINCE Photo caption: Yuzuru Hanyu in his childhood

(Slide 6)

"Oh no, hey, not so fast!", Coach Mami Yamada still remembers the impatience of the 4-year-old Yuzuru Hanyu when he first got onto the ice. He came running and jumped upon the ice, then fell down hard hitting his helmet onto the ice, and quickly got up and running again. Yamada raised her voice without thinking.

Every time he came to the rink together with his sister who were learning figure skating, he would run around outside the rink. After Yamada told him "If you're so noisy, want to try this?", Hanyu put on the skating boots. A child that skates for the first time would get onto the ice gently, fall from the sitting position and get used to the ice. However, Hanyu was different. "I've never seen such a fearless child.", she said.

Photo caption: Mami Yamada and Yuzuru Hanyu

(Slide 7)

The skating notes with which he reflects on himself

He would be bored of the training after 10 minutes and go somewhere else. His expression when he turned his head or swung his limbs was also unique. "He was very good at expressing his sincerity, it felt as if he were a prince from a shojo manga rather than a protagonist in a shonen manga." She wanted him to drop his style of doing things and learn the basics, but he didn't listen so she was very troubled.

He didn't remember what she said at all, so Yamada told him to keep a diary and write down things that he was advised on and couldn't do. They are the notes that Hanyu calls "research note", in which he has been continuously writing down key points.

Hanyu talked about it like this: "It's probably around my second year in elementary school. I've been doing so after I was told to keep a diary for daily practice. And I also write down the thoughts I have as I see fit."

After practice, for a short time in the evening before going to sleep, he would write down the ways he jumped and the movement of his arms while jumping. He has been experimenting at the practice rink to find the jumping style that would suit him.

(Slide 8)

Taking care of the raw talent

After coaching him until the end of his 2nd grade in elementary school, Yamada moved back to her parents' home in Hokkaido. At that time, she called the famous coach Shouichirou Tsuzuki. "Sensei, I beg you, please come to Sendai. Please make sure you don't put his talent to waste. Because he's an amazing child."

(Slide 9) Title: The people who have decorated Japanese Figure Skating history

(t/n: An interactive display of people who have greatly impacted the history of Japanese Figure Skating and their relationships. Because there are quite a lot of them, I only translated the information of those directly related to Yuzuru in the display)

Soushi Tanaka Born in 1982, from Miyagi Prefecture. "The jump genius" coached by Hiroshi Nagakubo. He taught Hanyu how to jump triple axel. Relationship with Hanyu: He coached Hanyu in his middle school and high school years. Mainly taught Hanyu jumps.

Hiroshi Nagakubo Born in 1945, from Yamanashi Prefecture. Won the Japanese Nationals in Pairs for 5 consecutive years from 1967 to 1971. Competed for Japan in the 1971 Sapporo Olympics.  After he turned to coaching, he has trained Shizuka Arakawa and other skaters. Relationship with Hanyu: He coached at the rink in Sendai where Hanyu skated. He advised and encouraged Hanyu on jumps.

Nanami Abe Born in 1972, from Miyagi Prefecture. A coach and choreographer. She coached Yuzuru Hanyu at Sendai's ice rink until 2012. Relationship with Hanyu: She coached Hanyu in his middle school and high school years. With a focus on the beauty of glides and skating skills.

Daisuke Takahashi Born in 1986, from Okayama. He is the 2002 Junior World Champion and was the first in Japanese Men's to win an Olympic medal, a bronze, at the 2010 Vancouver Olympics. Relationship with Hanyu: He co-starred with Hanyu in the charity ice shows supporting the recovery from the Great East Japan Earthquake.

Tatiana Tarasova Born in February, 1947, from Russia. She trained many World Champions and is called "Gold medal Maker". She also offered a piece of music as Hanyu's exhibition skate. Relationship with Hanyu: She offered his exhibition music for 2016-17.

Mami Yamada Born in 1973, from Hokkaido. She coached at Sendai's ice rink after graduating from Nippon Sport Science University. She coached Yuzuru Hanyu and his sister. After that, she moved to Sapporo. Relationship with Hanyu: She coached Hanyu since he started competing at 4 years old until his 2nd year of elementary school (~7 years old). She advised him to keep a diary.

Shouichirou Tsuzuki Born in 1938, from Aichi Prefecture. A Nion University alumnus. He established the instructor certification system. He trained Yuzuru Hanyu when Hanyu was small. Relationship with Hanyu: He coached Hanyu from Hanyu's 2nd year in elementary school after Coach Mami Yamada. He taught Hanyu the importance of dance and artistry.

Victor Ryzhkin He worked for the president of Soviet Union for a long time as a coach, and was the coach of Tarasova. From 1989, he came to Japan for a few years at the request of Tsuzuki and coached skaters there. Relationship with Hanyu: Ryzhkin coached Hanyu. He cooperated so that doing choreography and training in Russia would be possible.

Mao Asada Born in 1990, from Aichi Prefecture. A Chukyo University alumnus. The triple axel is her weapon. She is the 2008 and 2010 World Champion. He won the silver medal at 2010 Vancouver Olympics. Relationship with Hanyu: She co-starred with Hanyu in the charity ice shows supporting the recovery from the Great East Japan Earthquake.

Yutaka Higuchi Born in 1949, from Tokyo. He competed at the Olympics twice as a competitive skater. He was the first non-European member of the Cricket Club in Canada. Relationship with Hanyu: He asked his long time friends Orser and Wilson to support Hanyu.

Brian Orser Born in 1961, from Canada. He coached the 2010 Olympic Champion Kim Yuna (KOR). He has been coaching Yuzuru Hanyu since 2012. Relationship with Hanyu: He has been coaching Hanyu since 2012. Beside a emphasis on skating skills, he also respect his skaters' opinions.

David Wilson Born in 1966, from Canada. He's one of the world's best choreographers. He used to choreograph for Midori Ito upon the request of Yutaka Higuchi. He's also in charge of choreographing skaters such as Yuzuru Hanyu. Relationship with Hanyu: He has choreographed Hanyu's free and exhibition programs since 2012.

Jeffrey Buttle Born in 1982, from Canada. He was the 2006 Olympic Bronze Medalist and 2008 World Champion. He has been working on Hanyu's choreography since 2012 Relationship with Hanyu: He has been choreographing all of Hanyu's short programs since 2012, "to show the charm of a boy becoming a young man".

(Slide 10) 

Title: 9 YEARS OLD - 2003: BECOME AN ARTIST Photo caption: Yuzuru Hanyu when he was elementary schooler, after winning an international competition

(Slide 11)

Sing Sing Sing

From elementary school to middle school and even high school, Yuzuru Hanyu never changed and was always a mischievous kid. Looking back, Shouichirou Tsuzuki said "He would fight with other boys, cry and still go against them. He couldn't concentrate on ice and would lose interest after 5 minutes."

On the other hand, he felt the exceptionality of Hanyu's musicality. "When he skated with the music on, he performed very lively like a different person. He liked this song called 'Sing Sing Sing'. He really liked jazz, and would go skate to it right away all excited whenever we played that piece of music."

Photo caption: Shouichirou Tsuzuki and Yuzuru Hanyu when he was in elementary school

(Slide 12)

Expressing his feelings

In 1969, while visiting the former Soviet Union, Tsuzuki witnessed the kind of figure skating in which people performed jumps while dancing. He went through a lot of troubles to invite coach(es) from Soviet to Japan and teach the [Japanese] skaters those techniques.

Hanyu is different from other Japanese skaters and isn't embarrassed to express his emotions. He also has a good sense of balance and physical capability. "I thought that he is the skater of a new era at first sight", Tsuzuki said this every time. "Become an artist", "Spread your wings for the world to see". Tsuzuki took on the role of a mediator in order for Hanyu to train in Russia.

Photo caption: Skaters that Shouichirou Tsuzuki has coached (t/n: he was coached by Mitsuhiko Kozuka (Takahiko Kozuka’s grandfather) and coached many skaters such as Machiko Yamada, Minoru Sano, Takahashi Mura, Yuzuru Hanyu, Mami Yamada)

(Slide 13)

Looking back, Hanyu said: "Now I feel like I've understood what Tsuzuki-sensei had been telling me. When I was small, he taught me to jump with some extra quality. I realized, even when I was small, that it was very important to express my own emotions properly through my performance."

With both the ability to jump and to express his emotions, Hanyu expressed the depth of competition like this: "I think that I not only need to land all my jumps and use my physical power until its limits, but also need to create an atmosphere in which I can express myself properly as an artist."

Photo caption: Winning the Junior GPF 4.12.2009

(Slide 14) A short clip of coach Tsuzuki recalling his first encounter with Yuzuru (I didn’t translate this, as we already know most of the information here)

(Slide 15)

Title: 17 YEARS OLD - 2011: BEYOND THE TEARS Photo caption: Ice Rink Sendai after the earthquake 21.5.2011

(Slide 16)

Losing his rinks twice

After losing his rinks twice, Hanyu said that he himself changed. “In the first 3 years in elementary school, I always skipped practice.”

The first time, his rink closed due to financial difficulties. He was 10 years old at that time. The second time was due to the Great East Japan Earthquake when he was 16. He lived in an evacuation shelter, stood in line for 3 hours and stuffed his mouth with the one bag of candy that he got. When he left Sendai to come to Yokohama where Shouichirou Tsuzuki was at that time, Hanyu cried. "[He] was not sure whether it was okay to continue skating in such circumstances". That's what Tsuzuki told us.

(Slide 17)

The courage that Kobe gave him

Although he moved around many different places for about 60 shows between April and July, his heart was healed.

"I realized that the fans were supporting me. It made me think that I had to face my training seriously.", "I've received many invitations from others to come (to practice) at their places.",

"(At the show in Kobe) I put my thoughts about the earthquake into 'White Legend', and I received a lot of applause..... Kobe has recovered from a big earthquake. That gave me some courage. If I hadn't gone to Kobe, the idea of [continuing] to skate would have become really vague for me."

Photo caption: Practicing with Kanako Murakami 3.8.2011

(Slide 18)

Photo caption: Performing at the charity show in Kobe 9.4.2011

(Slide 19)

Landing quad salchow for the first time

Within that situation, he was scared of the aftershock he felt at Yokohama. He kept getting interviews as a symbol of the earthquake survivors that were persevering, but at the same time, he was also tortured by the feeling of helplessness: "I cannot do anything". In June, Hanyu bursted into tears as if a dam inside him had broken, and his mother told him words of support "[We/You] have to do our best, right?"

A few days later. Hanyu told him mother. "That's right. It's alright now because I've already cried."

At that time, Hanyu succeeded in landing the quad salchow, a difficult jump, for the first time. His coach, Soushi Tanaka, said: "He had been training with a very tired expression, but it suddenly changed. He laughed, saying "This is fun!". The kindness that many people treated him with after the earthquake became his treasure."

Audio: Hanyu’s thoughts about figure skating after the earthquake disaster 30.8.2013

Uhm, it was very tough that many things happened and there were a lot of ups and downs. Nevertheless, at the Kobe charity event, for the first time, I came to think that I've been supported by others all these times.....

Q: The Kobe charity was the first time after the earthquake?

That's right, it was the first time it became apparent to me, I skated to White Legend with things like the thoughts about that earthquake on my mind. Nevertheless, the audience gave me an applause. After all, Kobe is the town that has experienced and recovered from the Hanshin Great Kobe Earthquake, and even if it hasn't fully recovered, I think it feels like a town that is recovering [from the earthquake]. And so, I feel that it gave me courage. That's the reason why I can earnestly skate like this. If I hadn't gone to the Kobe charity event back then, I think that the idea of [continuing] to skate might have become really vague for me.

Q: Hanyu-kun is indeed very young, still in your teenage years, but with the Sochi Olympics next year, there must be some kind of feeling like you've become the representative of the earthquake disaster’s victims. As an athlete, how do you perceive that?

Uhm, rather than representing, I'm simply coming from Sendai, and if people recall the memories they have related to the earthquake disaster because of me then I'm grateful for it, after all, at this moment, there are still a lot of places that haven't recovered from the earthquake disaster, so I really want to convey that message to everyone properly from now onwards.

Having the opportunity to talk with many people from the media like this is indeed very... for recovery from the earthquake....[he changed his mind], it's not just to support for the recovery from the disaster, but I think that it'd be a good thing if it can become an opportunity for such support, and I myself am doing my best for it too as there are still places that haven't fully recovered, places that were hit hard by the tsunami or the earthquake.

However, even until now, there are still many people who are coming here to volunteer. That's why I think that we definitely don't want to forget such things.

Also, I hardly see any fund-raising activities recently, but after all, please try to come to the places that has experienced the earthquake and places that has been hit by the tsunami if possible, even just for once. Uhm, this is not a request from me saying 'I hope you will do something', but rather 'I hope you won't forget'.

Uhm, but I am an athlete, and I'm in the position in which I can skate, apart from that, I strongly think that I must continue competing for a long time. If I do so, appear on TV and achieve some results, I hope that that can become a chance for something, such as a chance for others to remember [the areas affected by the earthquake disaster], I think that'd be a good thing.  

(Slide 20)

Title: 18 YEARS OLD - 2012: I WANT TO BREAK THROUGH Video caption: Performing at an event in Yokohama 16.8.2017

(Slide 21)

Photo caption: Talking with coach Orser during practice 15.2.2017

(Slide 22)

To Canada where great skaters gather

At a kaiseki restaurant in Shibuya, Tokyo. Hanyu, his current coach Brian Orser, the current director of ANA's skating department Noriko Shirota, and Yutaka Higuchi, who has been involved in the training of Japanese skaters for over 40 years, they pledged together: "Let's aim to be the World Champion".

In the summer of 2012 right after that gathering, Hanyu moved his training base to Canada. Higuchi was the one who recommended him to transfer to a prestigious skating school in Toronto called "Cricket Club".

The primary coach of Cricket, Brian Orser, used the difficult 3.5-rotation jump as his weapon in his competitive days, so he could give Hanyu, who wanted to become the quad-era pioneer, apt advices. They were kind and there was no worry that chased after Hanyu. Canada, a place with many immigrants, treated him without any discrimination.

Higuchi thought the same and made necessary arrangements with his old friend Orser and the famous choreographer David Wilson, saying "Take care of Hanyu-kun".

(Slide 23)

Hanyu was surprised at the skating environment of the place he had moved to. The quad(s) of Javier Fernandez, who would later be in contention for the World Champion title. The kids' one-footed turns. Hanyu said "It was frustrating. But I was happy. Because I've found many things that made me think 'I want to become more like that'."

(Slide 24)

Photo caption: Performing his SP at Sochi Olympics 6.2.2014

(Slide 25)

The heartbreaker in Sochi

Jeffrey Buttle, who was very close with Wilson and choreographed for Hanyu together with him, brought out more than enough 'the charm of Yuzuru, the boy who is trying to become a young man' in the short program "Parisian Walkways". Hanyu, who acted like 'a heartbreaker that messed around with girls', reset the World's Record scores 4 times. At the 2014 Sochi Olympics, he won the gold medal with this short and the free program choreographed by Wilson. Even after Sochi, Hanyu repeatedly broke the World's Records many times with the short programs choreographed by Buttle. Polished by the Canadians, the Japanese talent shone even brighter.

Photo caption: People related to Yutaka Higuchi (t/n: he is friend with Brian Orser, David Wilson and supported many skaters such as Yuzuru Hanyu, Miki Ando, Machiko Yamada, Shin Hea-sook (Kim Yuna’s coach))

(Slide 26)

The event that brought Hanyu to skating was the 1998 Nagano Olympics. He started to competed together with his sister, who was riding that boom [of interest in figure skating].

The Olympics that determined his life. He vowed "It is because I've became a gold medalist that this is the start". Continuing the rehabilitation for his right foot which has been injured during practice, Hanyu is trying to be the first skater in 66 years to win back-to-back Olympic Gold in Men's Figure Skating. This season, he said these words: "Be it hardships or joys, I'll embrace each of those things in my heart", "With the warm support from everyone, I'd like to do my best at the Olympics".

(t/n: the article was written in December 2017)

(Slide 27)

Yuzuru Hanyu Born in 1994, from Sendai. Affiliated with ANA

2018 Pyeongchang Olympic Champion

2017 World Champion

2016 Grand Prix Final Champion

2015 Grand Prix Final Champion

2014 Grand Prix Final Champion

2014 World Champion

2014 Sochi Olympic Champion

2013 Japanese National Champion

2013 Grand Prix Final Champion

2012 Japanese National Champion

2010 Junior World Champion

2008 Japanese Junior National Champion

[hymn2000]

Chiquitita - MCU AU fanfic - C27

Story summary: Something strange is happening. Someone from space has made their way to Earth, armed with a strange weapon. Targeting teenagers, their ray gun, when fired, turns the victim into a toddler. The Avengers set out to stop this, and find a way to reverse the effects. However, they don’t all come out of the battle unscathed.

Previous chapters: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22   23 24  25  26

Part of my Frostiron and Spiderson series.

Warnings/themes: de-aging, family stuff, corporal punishment (early chapters only), mental health stuff, hurt/comfort, hospital/medical stuff

Chapter 27 - Sick And Tired

-

Loki sat in the reading nook, little Peter fast asleep on his chest. Tony sat down beside him. 

“You can’t stay in here all day”

“What makes you so sure?”

“Loki... You know he’s not got much time left as a toddler. Maybe we should let him go a bit mad, play with all his toys at once and stuff like that. I get he’s having a nap now, but you’ve just kinda been sat with him all day”

“We’ve been reading and doing his flashcards”

Tony sighed. “Give him to me”

“He’s comfortable”

Tony sighed again. He stayed quiet. For a moment, Loki did too.

“...You never even tried to understand”

“Loki, please”

Loki swallowed. “Jo Jo understands”

Tony sighed irritably. “Of course he agrees with you. He-”

“I said he understands” Loki interrupted. “Not that he agrees”

Tony took Peter from him and stood up, much to Loki’s dismay.

“Tony! Give him back”

“No. I want to hold him”

“You want to turn a gun on him too”

“Loki, you’re being deliberately awkward. The reversal gun isn’t like a gun gun. It’s gonna help him, not hurt him”

Peter squirmed in Tony’s arms as he woke up, whining.

“Hey, bambino. How are you doing?”

Peter looked up at Tony, and across at Loki. “Thirsty”

“Yeah? No problem, kiddo. Let’s go and get you a drink”

-

Loki sat down on the carpet, watching Peter playing with his trains. 

“Hey, darling” he said gently.

“H’y da’y” Peter said indistinctly.

Loki looked at him. “What have you got in your mouth?”

Peter made a run for it, but Loki was fast, and caught him quickly. He forced Peter’s mouth open, retrieving the offending object.

“Is that- is that a circuit board?! TONY!!!”

Tony soon came into the room. “Yes?”

“What the hell is this?” Loki said, holding up the circuit board.

“Oh, I misplaced that earlier!” Tony said, taking it from him. “Thanks, honey. Where did you find it?”

“In our sons mouth”

“Oh” Tony laughed awkwardly. “Sorry”

“You can’t leave things like that lying around when we’ve got a toddler roaming about. You should know that by now”

“I’ve said sorry! Look, no harm done. No harm done, right, Peter?”

“No harm done!” Peter grinned.

Loki sighed and stood up, lifting Peter into his arms. 

“Daddy! Put me down!” Peter protested. 

“Why don’t we go and do some painting?” Loki suggested.

Peter immediately brightened. “Ok!”

“Oh Loki, come on!” Tony whined. 

Loki ignored him, and swept out of the room.

-

Just as Tony expected, Peter was covered in paint when he went into the kitchen later that day.

“Brilliant”

“He’s wearing an apron, Anthony” 

“I hope you haven’t got paint all over the breakfast bar”

“Cleverly observe the newspapers, darling”

“I painted a picture of my rocket!” Peter grinned. “And this is the ducks at the park, and this is us swimming, and this is me and mumma, and this is me with you and daddy!”

“Ooh, aren’t they lovely?” Tony said, looking at Peter’s paintings. “You’re quite the little artist, aren’t you?”

Peter giggled happily. Tony ruffled his hair. 

“Well then, chick. I think you need to go and have a bath while I get tea ready”

“Oh” Peter looked at Loki. “Can I play with my toys?”

“You can play with your bath toys, yes” Loki said. “Take your apron off. We’d better do as we’re told”

Peter took his apron off and lay it down carefully on the table. He jumped down from his seat, blinking up at Loki.

“Bath time?”

Loki nodded and took his hand. 

-

Loki took his time washing Peter, being as gentle and thorough as possible. Peter frowned. Loki wasn’t making eye contact and talking the way he usually did. Something was wrong. 

“Daddy?”

Loki looked at him. “Yes, darling?”

“Are you sad?”

Loki paused. “Maybe a little bit”

“Why?”

“It’s not something I can explain to you. You don’t need to worry about me”

“Do you wanna play with my bath toys? They make me happy when I’m sad”

Loki smiled. “Yeah, let’s play with your toys. We just need to rinse your hair, and then we can play”

“My water wheel!” Peter said. “I want my water wheel!”

Loki finished rinsing him off and then found the water wheel, pressing it to the inside of the bath. He handed Peter a beaker to be getting on with, and found some of the best bath toys for Peter to play with. Peter hummed happily to himself, keeping the wheel turning with cupfuls of water. Loki lined a few boats up on the water and put a little rubber duck on each of them. He found the big duck that quacked when it hit the water, and floated it in the bath. Peter grinned and giggled. He kept pouring water over his water wheel, quacking away to himself, imitating the big duck. Loki stroked the boys wet hair gently.

“I love you”

“I love you too” Peter said, and continued quacking. 

Loki looked at the tiny boy. He looked at his bright eyes and his little interested face. He looked at his little nose. He looked at him, and thought how tiny and perfect every part of him was. He looked at the little smile on the boys face. 

“You are such a good boy, my little darling” he said gently. “You’re such a good boy”

“Can we go to the park tomorrow?”

“We’ll see” Loki sighed. 

“What are we having for tea?”

“I don’t know. Other daddy is cooking”

Peter stopped quacking and dropped the beaker in the bath. 

“Peter?”

“I heard something”

Loki listened, and heard footsteps. A moment or two later, Tony opened the bathroom door.

“Daddy!”

“Hey, chick” Tony said. He looked at Loki. “Tea’ll be ten minutes”

“Ok” Loki said. “We’ll be in soon”

Tony left, and Loki looked at Peter. 

“Time to get out of the bath, chick” Loki said. 

“Do I have to?”

“I’m afraid so. We need to get you dried and into your night clothes so we can go and have dinner” Loki said. “Ok?”

Peter looked at his toys, and reluctantly pulled the bath plug out. Loki carefully lifted him out of the bath and wrapped him up in a warm towel. He picked him up and cradled him close. 

“Let’s get you sorted”

-

Loki and Tony let Peter stay up later than usual that night. After tea they went into the living room and put on a Wallace and Gromit DVD. Loki gave Peter a little bit of fizzy pop in his sippy cup as a special treat. Peter sat on the floor with his drink, rocking his baby doll in its cot with his foot and lining his little toy dinosaurs up on his legs. As usual, his rocket was under his arm.

Tony put an arm round Loki’s shoulders. “I love you, you know”

“I know” Loki said. He sighed. “I love you too. I just don’t like you right now”

Tony sighed. “I know”

“Do you remember that song on Oliver and Company that always made him cry?”

“Once Upon A Time In New York City” Tony nodded. “You put that film on when he was in such a bad way. It still makes him cry now. God, it makes me cry too. I honestly don’t know how we got through losing May. Seeing him cry just absolutely destroys me”

“You used to sing to him” Loki said. “When he was crying, you’d just sing to him. Your voice would crack, but you’d just about manage not to cry. Most of the time, anyway”

“We sent him to school way too soon” Tony said. “He wasn’t ready to go to school. He wasn’t ready for any of it. Do you ever think about how it would have worked out if we’d done things differently?”

Loki nodded. “We were both horrible to him at times throughout that year. I was horrible to him before I went on my sabbatical. You were horrible to him while I was away. We made so many mistakes. How could we expect to look after him when we were mourning so heavily too? Yes, we sent him to school too early. We did lots of things too early... It feels like a nightmare, doesn’t it? If you think back properly? God, it was horrendous. He was absolutely destroyed by what happened. We should have forced him to see a therapist straight away. We should have worked through it with him properly, professionally. Maybe things would have been better if we had”

“Maybe. But... Loki, I know we did so much wrong. But we did our best. We were in a horrible place. Like you say; we were mourning too. Both of us still had other commitments too. And then to suddenly have him full time, and for the worst possible reason? We did do our best, I know we did. We tried to keep him fed, and we kept him clean and dressed and we tried to be there for him whenever he needed us. Sure, there’s things we did that we shouldn’t’ve, and we didn’t address everything we should have, and not in the right way. But you know we did our best”

Loki looked at little Peter, who looked so contented and interested, watching the DVD.

“Do you ever think that our best wasn’t good enough?”

“It was all we had, Loki. We did the best that we could under those circumstances. He got better, didn’t he? He’ll never be the person he was before the accident, we know that. But he’s as good as he’s gonna get”

“It makes me feel sick” Loki said. “Thinking about the way he was, the way he was feeling. Doesn’t it you?”

“Loki...”

“I’m serious, Anthony. Just think about it for a minute. Think about him begging on his knees at May’s funeral, begging her not to leave him. Think about how angry he was in the days following, all of that shouting and screaming. Think about those depressing months that followed. Think about the fact that he was in tears far more often than he was out of them. Think about the day we found out what those kids at the first school had done to him. Think about the day he found out about us and May. Think about how scared he was that year. Think about-”

“Stop it” Tony said. “Please, just stop. I know it was horrible, I know it hurts, I know what it was like. But we got through it. It’s done, Loki. All of that is done with. It might have been hell on Earth, but it’s done with now. It’s all in the past. Peter’s better now”

“The toddler doesn’t remember any of that horrible stuff”

“Loki, don’t. You can’t keep saying this stuff. I love the toddler, I really do, but that doesn’t mean we should keep him this way”

“What if I don’t want teenage Peter any more?”

“Don’t say that. You don’t mean that”

“Don’t I?”

“No, you don’t!” Tony hissed. “...Do you remember the song from Tarzan I used to sing to him?”

Tears filled Loki’s eyes, and his face crumpled. He rested his head in his hand, half-covering his face.

“I can’t do this”

Tony held him tighter. “I used to sing it to you, too”

“Don’t do this”

“I love you, Loki. I love both of you so much. You’ve been great with the toddler, but you know we can’t keep him like this. We need to give our teenage son his life back. All the horrible memories, yes, but all the good ones too. Think about him laughing, Loki. Think about his smile, and his jokes, and the way it feels when he wriggles under your arm for a hug. Think about how excited he is when he tells us about his patrols or when he’s been round at one of the Bunnies places. Think about how proud we feel when we see him win his swim competitions... Remember the look on his face when we told him we wanted to adopt him”

Loki turned and buried his face in Tony’s chest. “I can’t let go of this little boy”

“It’s not goodbye. It’s just a flash, and then we’ll have a slightly heavier son to hold. The son we adopted. The one who called us dad first”

“You’ve been dad far longer than I have”

“That doesn’t make him any less your son. You know that” Tony rested his mouth against Loki’s head. 

“You’ve always been his favourite. You always will be”

“He’s still your son too. You’re still daddy Loki... I know you’re scared”

Loki swallowed hard. “We’ve got the chance to give our son a life where he’s happy. This little boy is happy, he’s never been anything but happy. How can you think it’s wrong to give him this chance?”

“Would you give up your life for one where you’ve never been hurt?”

“He’s not giving up anything. He’s still got us”

“What about his friends? Loki, he doesn’t even remember May”

Loki just buried himself further into Tony’s chest and clung to him. Tony held him tight.

“Can I tell you a secret?”

Loki didn’t say anything. Tony took a minute. He sighed, and spoke:

“I’m scared too”

-

Loki waited until Tony was fast asleep, and then snuck into Peter’s room. Much to his surprise, the toddler was awake. He was sat up in bed, holding his rocket in both hands and looking thoughtful.

“Hello, darling” Loki said gently. “Are you ok?”

“I woke up” Peter said. “Do you think daddy will make me a real rocket if I ask him to?”

Loki blinked hard to dry the tears that had welled in his eyes. He was glad of the night light, as the blue glow probably did a good job of hiding his emotions. He sat down on the edge of the bed. 

“It’s late, my darling” he said. “I think you should try to go back to sleep”

“Oh” Peter said. “Ok. Are we going to the park tomorrow?”

Loki swallowed. “We’ll see”

Peter looked at his rocket and set it aside. He held his arms up to Loki.

“Sleepover?”

“What do you mean?” Loki asked, lifting the toddler into his arms and holding him close, breathing in his scent.

“You stay in my room tonight”

“Of course, if that’s what you want”

“Yep” Peter said. “My bed is enormous, so there’s room for you too!”

“So I see. Well then” 

Loki pulled the covers back and climbed into bed. He set little Peter down on his back and gave him his rocket, and then lay down on his side beside him. Peter wriggled closer, pressing his side against Loki’s chest. Loki propped himself up on his elbow, looking down at the boy.

“Comfortable?”

“Mm” Peter nodded, hugging his rocket against his chest. “If we don’t go to the park tomorrow, can we go swimming instead?”

“We’ll see. You need to go to sleep now”

Loki stroked the boys fluffy hair gently. Peter looked up at him, yawning so that his nose wrinkled.

“I think you’re tired” Loki said gently.

He lay down properly, pulling the covers over them and putting an arm round Peter, holding him close. 

“Goodnight, daddy”

“Goodnight, darling”

Peter closed his eyes and soon fell asleep. Loki stayed with him, listening to the soft sounds of him breathing, and stroking his hair and face gently. He could hear the clock ticking on the wall, and it made his heart thump harder still. He felt so sick. He kissed Peter’s cheek gently.

He couldn’t sleep for ages. For a long time he just lay there, holding Peter close, choking back tears, and wishing morning would never come.

*

[literallyprentissstwin]

Week 7: Monday, June 25th to Sunday, July 1st 2018 

bonjour y´all and welcome back to a new week of my reading list. it´s tuesday when i´m typing this and i already have like 18(!) up until now, so prepare for an ass long list hahah. 

as usual, i picked out my fav stories i read over the week. please don´t be sad if you didn´t make it on the list. it´s just a little sneek of what i read in a week, this is far from everything i read during one week, these are just the fics i loved the most. every writer is unique and awesome in their own way, so shoutout to all of us writers!!! 

i really hope you´ll enjoy the list & don´t forget to leave some love and feedback to the authors! 

- aileen 

1.) Secrets Don´t Deserve Funerals II JJ by @alittlelessthanfandomimagines 

cute perfect ugh. i don´t have any words bc i´m speechless. thank you for adding a new part, i´m in heaven. i love emma´s and jj´s relationship a lot & i really hope spencer gets his sh*** together! great work :) 

2.) Survivor - Chapter 6 & 7 by @docspencerreid 

ugh okay part 6 hurt me so so good and i just love penelope with my whole heart. it´s so so heartbreaking, but so so good. spencer broke my heart as well. and then, part 7...holy shit. why are you doing this to me? like they finally “confessed” their feelings for eachother and then BOOM. i´m crying. can´t wait for the second part :) great job :) 

3.) It Should´ve Been Me by @tenaciousarcadeexpert 

this was a fabulous fic for my challenge :) and wow wow wow my poor heart, i mean who needs a heart anyway? the angst oooooooo god, i was at the edge of my seat. SO.GOOD. i´m beyond speechless. great work & well done! i loved evrey second of it :) 

4.) Petrichor by @dontshootmespence 

cute as fuck. i love when he talks facts and statistics. beautiful, just perfect. my ice cold heart is happy. also RELATIONSHIPGOALS. 

5.) Nightmares by @doctor-daddy-spencer-reid 

this was so beautiful oh my gossshhhh. the emotions, the angst, hurt/comfort = perfectly combined. spencer is such a good boyfriend ugh and you´re so talented, i´m gonna brb crying. 

6.) When We Were Young - Spencer Reid by @playlist-reid 

aw aw are you all trying to kill me with your fics? it´s only tuesday and i already died multiple times (i wrote this part of the list on tuesday hahah). perfect, golden, a must read. 

7.) Later // Spencer Reid by @spencerthepipecleaner  

ANGST OH YES!!!!! but death ugggghhhhh....it´s still so so so good and i loved reading it so so  much! you are all so talented! 

8.) Losing Faith and Family by @alittlelessthanfandomimagines 

this is another fic for my challenge thihi. god this was so good, like you really had me. the angst was def there and i was so sad but then i read the end and ugh awww my heart. great work! 

9.) What are You Doing? (Luke Alvez x Reader) by @dedeimagines 

cute cute cute. adoreable. i love me some good Luke fics and this was a really good one. also Garcia was pretty amazing in it :) well done! 

10.) Drowning by @moonlit-martyr 

masterpiece. i mean it. masterpiece. you are so so talented, this fic was so well written & so good! every emotion was covered. god, so good! 

11.) A Secret Rival by @abcreid 

the end = savage. also i loved how spencer always interrupted her = jealous????? the team was hilarious. great job! 

12.) Sleepless Nights // Spencer Reid by @itsmeedee 

DAD!REID!!!!! *runs around screaming in 20 different languages* this was everything & more. cutenesss overload. though the flashbacks make me sad, please tell me you didn´t kill off the baby´s mom ugh. 

13.) Article of Faith - Chapter 16 & 17 by @dontshootmespence 

aw it´s still so underrated, GO READ THIS SERIES I BEG YOU. okay so part 16: this moment between PG and Pretty Boy was everything. also the relationship between Billiw and Reid makes me happy; they are so cute fml. part 17: he goes to visit the team ugggh. and also the reference to the donuts and when emily came back omg. i like how he continues to support her and how he nevertheless shows interest in what she is doing although he might not like it. such a good bf. i love it so much! great work! 

14.) Chinese Takeout by @inkstainedfanfics 

i loved this fic. it was so so cute and so well written. the end tho :) great work! 

15.) Coffee by @therealtrashhere 

cute cute cute. also, the team was hilarious. can I have someone in my life who also brings me a cup of coffee everyday? maybe spencer himself? thank you! loved it a lot :) 

16.) Number One by @ionlyreadfivebookslastweek 

you had me at angsty. like i´m always there for angst. no matter what. this was so good, like for real. but please don´t fight babes :(((((

17.) Infiltrated: Part 7 by @stunudo 

i think it was beyond time that i add this series to my list. i just needed to do some catching up first, before adding it and let´s just say that this series deserves an award. it only gets better and better from part to part. it sometimes gets confusing but just bc i am so dumb, but it´s so good. go read it! 

18.) question for question by @uncomfie 

you are literally the queen/king of the derek morgan fics. you´re so so good and talented, it hurts. teach me please! i loved it so much ugh. i love a protective derek morgan and i miss him a lot. great work :) 

19.) I´m Sorry by @xocriminal-minds-imaginesxo 

this was a fic for my challenge and i loved it so so much. the angst, omg. my heart ugh. aaron boi ugh what are you doing? but seriously, this boy is too precious for this world. he always wants to protect everyone from this cruel world. you can only love him. the end holy shit. i did not expect this. i hate scratch. well done! 

20.) target - part two, three & four by @uncomfie 

ok folks, if you´re looking for a really good series, this is it! recommend 10/10. this is giving me life istg. one of the best angst series i read so far. they are one hell of a couple, i´m in love. it breaks my heart to see derek so devasted and lost and helpless, my poor baby. but the end was making up for everything. the suspense, and angst, i´m in heaven. def gonna reread it soon. go check it out. it´s so good! well done! 

21.) Long Day? (Spencer x Reader) by @ourhappylies 

cute cute cute. i loved the relaxed reactions of the team & how they all already knew. profilers ahahahhaa. also spencer is so cute, it hurts. well done :) 

22.) Broken // Emily Prentiss by @itsmeedee 

this has been an entry for my challenge. i gave you my fav prompt i had on this list and you used it so well. omg you played the ian doyle card. when i read it, i swear my heart stopped for a minute. my heart broke for emily omg, how could you do this to my baby? preach you for an amazing fic. i loved reading it a lot. the end was soo goood! recommend 10/10!!!

23.) Happy Ending by @xocriminal-minds-imaginesxo 

cramps are shit, worst part of these special weeks yk. but it was so cute and aww spencer, how are you a genius hahahahhaha. also this convo between emily & Y/N and the sarcasm, i´m loving it. the end was so cute, my heart melted. 

24.) Thalassophobia I Matt Simmons x Reader by @youvebeenwinchesterd 

yes, an amazing matt fic <333 there was a little bit of angst, a lot of suspense and some cute shit at the end. the perfect mix. my emotions were in overload. this was so good. i really liked it. matt is so cute. well done :) 

25.) Please be okay (Spencer Reid x Reader) by @dedeimagines 

angst & fluff = AWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. my poor spencie. he´s so scared :(((( but the end turns out to be happy thank god! it was a shorty, but really good !:) 

26.) High School Rom-Com by @xocriminal-minds-imaginesxo 

angsty stuff omg. i´ve been blessed this week. the team is so adoreable and caring and comforting omg. also, I loved Luke a lot in this fic. the end made me swoon :)))))

27.) Have It All by @ionlyreadfivebookslastweek 

relationship goals, for real. the reader is so understanding & supportive. caring. this was so freaking cute. i can´t cope. 

28.) Redamancy Pt. 3 by @xocriminal-minds-imaginesxo 

i love this tension between Ella and Luke. and i also love penny in this story a lot. also protective luke is my religion. this is so good! 

29.) I Love You >> Spencer Reid by @eideticreid  

wtf this was so freaking cute???? i´m shook. like really. was this even real? i also cried happy tears while reading this. well done! very well written:) 

30.) A Reunion // Aaron Hotchner by @literallyreid 

another fic for my challenge, y´all are blessing me with your talent. okay, this was really good. like really really. i loved reading it a lot. it also made me miss Hotch an extra lot more, but that´s okay. great work :) 

31.) eleven blocks by @uncomfie 

she did it again. another awesome derek fic. why are you so good at this????? i loved reading this a lot. it was perfect ugh. the end was everything! well done :) 

32.) Alive or Not by @abcreid 

and another fic for my challenge yey :) this was so perfectly angst holy hell. the open end, omg really???? btw i think i swear too much but i can´t help myself. oh and btw your english is really good, so don´t worry!!! :) 

33.) Jealousy by @boywondxrreid 

this was so good. i love how blind reid is. the team was so cute and supportive, understanding and caring. also reid at the end, worrying about the reader. but i´m happy everything turned out well :) 

okay, this has been this weeks list! i really hope you liked it! leave some love to the authors and their stories. we´ll see each other again next sunday! have a good week!

- aileen