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Descendants Sortings
Mal
Mal is a burned Lion Primary. It isn’t obvious at first, but the more her character developed over the course of the series, the more clear it became she is not a Snake -frankly, this girl would have been better off if she would have taken a more self-serving Snake mentality (uo, I know!) in the latter movies- and no Bird, as she shows none of the signs. I did debate whether she might be a Badger primary or no, but both her ‘I want’ songs (If Only and My once upon a time) show she is a burned Lion who is desperate to unburn, but well, her internal compass has been skewed by being raised by Maleficent: “I can't decide/ What's wrong, what's right/ Which way should I go?”/“You had a cause to serve, but did you serve it?”
Mal really really needs a Cause to work for. In Descendants 1, her Cause is making her mother proud by stealing the wand. In Descendants 2, her new Cause is to be the perfect lady of the court and girlfriend for Ben. And she feels like she’s failing miserably at it, which is why she lives for the Isle. This and the fact that Mal is pretty much facing an identity crisis here and feels like her entire life is being caged by the life everyone else is planning for her. Both nightmarish situations for a Lion who isn’t entirely unburned yet. In the third movie, Mal’s Cause is to be a good queen for Auradon, no matter the price. I personally find Mal’s arc very compelling and intriguing as I think we rarely see a protagonist who is loved by the narrative supporting a point of view the narrative disagrees with, but still be treated with empathy by it.
Her Secondary is even more interesting to me cause before rewatching, I would have never thought she is a Bird Sec, but yet it is so plain! Mal uses magic as a very efficient tool despite never being formally taught. She just gets handed a book and is told to figure it out on the fly. And she does it spectacularly … by paying attention to the instructions like with the love potion. She’s also the planner of the group, some of the plans being better than others (drugging Ben, giving Uma the fake wand etc.). And last, but not least: Mal is an information gatherer. One seemingly insignificant scene that showcases a great lot about Mal is in the car in the first movie, when she asked which button opens the barrier. They almost died, witnessed magic for the first time and are leaving their homes, yet this is on her mind.
Evie
Evie is the textbook Badger Secondary. She is defined by her sewing and hard work. The girl is so good at it, she manages to buy her own castle with the money! I do think she has a Snake Secondary Model in order to play the role of The Temptress that was forced on her.
I had a harder time figuring out the primary, but one thing is clear from the start: Evie is a Loyalist. She’s the one who is more or less keeping the group together and she sometimes clashes a little bit with Mal, as Loyalists don’t see the bigger picture the way Idealists do, which in Evie’s case, is a very good thing. I contemplated Badger, but I’m pretty sure she’s a Snake actually. Evie may be one of the biggest advocates for the Isle kids, but she only becomes one after she says Dizzy again. In D2, Evie is willing to go to the Isle to save Mal even though she’s afraid she might get stuck there. And yet she still volunteers to stay with Mal there, because Mal is her best friend. Evie is a Snake through and through and I think it’s very interesting how in the third movie, which shows the darker side of Lion primaries, it’s Snake!Evie (and Uma) that are framed as being right.
Jay
Jay has a Snake secondary he uses to steal and charm people. And sometimes to exploit loopholes eg. making Lonnie captain in the second movie. He is a Lion Primary, of the Glory Hound variety in the first movie. His entire arc there is to learn how to work inside a team.
Carlos de Vill
Carlos is also an immature primary, but unlike Jay, he is a Hedonistic Snake. When they first arrive in Auradon, he’s mostly interested in eating chocolate and playing video games. He’s also the one most annoyed later on by Evie and Mal always going off to chat amongst themselves leaving him and Jay out of the loop. Bird secondary: he is a tech genius and knowledge gatherer (see how he tries to see if his clapping can make the statue change in D1).
King Ben
Let’s make one thing clear, D1!Ben is smart. And a troll (see him introducing Mal to his parents or how he tells Mal he knew about the love potion). He is framed as the Big Damn Hero in both the first and the second movie, which of course made me think he had one of the ‘heroic’ primaries: Badger or Lion. I settled on Lion, as it is incredibly easy for him to go against the grain. Something not a lot of people can say in this franchise. He’s also extremely concerned with upholding his role as a good king. He forgives Mal for the love potion because she risks her life to save him, which convinces him she is not an evil person. Ben has very firm convictions. He is the only one who stands up for the VKs at Family Day despite being the one with an actual reason to hate them.
He definitely has a Fluid Secondary, as a huge part of his charm is the fact that he tries to make himself liked. But he’s also a hard worker who disapproves heavily of taking shortcuts (see his fight with Mal over her using magic for everything) which made me go with Badger.
Uma
Uma is a classic (exploded) Snake primary. It seems to be all about Mal in D2. She’s enraged when Mal says she’s never given Uma a thought since she left. Ben offers her to come to Auradon and be part of a solution for saving other VKs. But Uma refuses. And I think it’s both because she wants to do things her way, but also because Uma is not exactly looking at the bigger picture here the way Ben is. ‘You don’t get to win everytime.’ These are her words to Mal when she realizes she had been tricked with a fake wand. Her secondary is a little trickier but I’m going with Bird because, here’s the thing, Uma is Mal’s mirror. Ben clocks it almost immediately: “She’s an angry girl with a bad plan. Not so different from you when you first came to Auradon.” Mal also constantly shows that she understands Uma and her methods better than anyone. Uma even uses the same plan as Mal when she uses the love spell on Ben. These girls are two sides of the same coin. (A bit of a side note, but I’m really curious how they are going to handle Uma as the Principal of Auradon Prep in D4. The clips we’ve seen so far make me really optimistic. Plus, since I’ve been hopelessly contaminated by TVD and never cured, Uma as principal reminded me of Caroline as headmistress in Legacies and yeah, I’m very optimistic this means good things for Uma xDD).
Li Lonnie
Lion Secondary as she is extremely honest and straightforward: “I know you hate us. And you are evil. But I’ve got money.” she says when she wants Mal to give her a new haircut. You don’t really get more Lion than that. Her primary was harder but from the first movie she looked to me like an Idealist with the way she saw the world: “Even villains love their kids.” I’m thinking Lion as in D2, she clearly goes to the Isle to prove herself by saving the king. Sounds familiar? Well, Lion primary Mulan did the same.
Princess Audrey
Audrey is another Lion Secondary girl in Auradon. Seriously this girl’s attempts at manipulation, make Mal look subtle: “Make me your queen and I’ll wake everybody up.” Villain!Audrey was a hammer: all raw power, no finesse. D1!Audrey was no better either, see her very blunt introduction to the VKs.
Audrey is a Badger Primary, no doubt in my mind about it. She’s very upset when the VKs disturb the Auradon Prep hierarchy and she exhibits some very typical Badger prejudices. “And then everybody looks good. So where would I be?” Audrey asks when she realizes Mal is giving the other girl make-overs, because she needs the social validation from being the prettiest princess there. In D3 it kills her that she did everything right and still someone else gets to be queen. I find it super interesting that Audrey asks Ben to ‘make [her] queen’ when she definitely had the power to crown herself. You might think it was because she loved him, but Queen of Mean ,which is her ‘I want’ song, shows very clearly that it was never about Ben the person. What she wants is his validation, because Audrey was raised to believe that his opinion, as the King, is the most important one. Audrey isn’t a Snake looking to have Ben for herself, a Lion seeking glory or a Bird trying to ‘rectify’ a system that is wrong; she is a Badger who is working within the confines of her society to achieve the status she wants.
Jane
Jane is so so Burned, I can’t help but wonder what the hell was Fairy Godmother doing cause she sure as hell wasn’t parenting her daughter the way she was supposed to. Jane is a Badger Primary who was ostracized by her only community so of course she latches onto Mal and Evie the first time they show her kindness. But D1 is a story about the failings of Badger primaries and the sheep mentality, so when she gains status and the VKs lose it following the events of Family Day, of course Jane aligns herself with the popular kids. She’s not gonna risk becoming an outcast again. This is also the driving force behind her stealing the wand. Her secondary is also super burned, but I’m betting on Lion. Not only is she extremely honest and impulsive, but Lion seems to be the default secondary for Auradon girls. Which is super interesting since generally Lion is not the secondary framed as the most feminine, but here it is.
...I just realized Jane is the burned version of Audrey. Oh, the irony!
Harry Hook
Double Snake, most likely. He is loyal to Uma and Uma only. He also has the ~vibe of a Snake secondary.
Prince Chad Charming
Chad is such a Snake Primary with Audrey as his person. He’s also pretty hedonistic as seen in D2: Ben might be dying, but the most important think is well, could Chad be second in line for the throne? I was a bit unsure of his secondary, but I think it is Badger as the only two times he’s successful (getting Evie in trouble for using the mirror, snapping at the VKs at Family Day) is when he involves other people.
Doug
Another Badger Primary. After Family Day, he gives into the peer pressure and shuns the VKs like everyone else. Maybe Badger Secondary too? Who knows, honestly this guy doesn’t have that much of a personality. But he seems to be a Bookkeeper Badger with the way he and Evie understand each other.
Gil
Gil doesn’t get to shine much, but I think he may be another Double Badger, and probably one of the sweetest Badger in the whole series. And considering he is the son of Gaston, I can’t help but appreciate the irony.
Dizzy
Dizzy is framed as a mirror for Evie in the second movie: the girl who could be so much more, if only she got the chance. This makes me think the two house share and Dizzy is a Snake Badger too. Which honestly tracks with the way she works at the salon and seems to hold no grudge on Evie getting to achieve her dreams while she doesn’t. Because Evie is her person, so of course Dizzy can’t be mad at her.
Celia Facillier
Celia is a Snake Primary who wants the guarantee of being able to see her father after she comes to Auradon, because she loves her father. It’s that simple. Considering how she throws the ember in the water out of rage when she realizes Mal has been lying to her, I’m thinking Lion Secondary.
Tl; Dr
Mal - (burned) Lion/Bird
Evie - Snake/Badger with Snake model
Jay - Glory Hound Lion/Snake
Carlos - hedonistic Snake/Bird
Ben - Lion/Badger
Uma - (exploded) Snake/Bird
Lonnie - Lion/Lion
Audrey - Badger/Lion
Jane - burned Badger/bunred Lion
Harry - Snake/Snake
Chad - Snake/Badger
Doug - Badger/Badger
Gil - Badger/Badger
Dizzy - Snake/Badger
Celia - Snake/Lion
#descendants#sortinghatchats#my sorting#my thoughts#mal bertha#evie (descendants)#jay (descendants)#king ben#princess audrey#audrey rose#uma (descendants)#carlos de vil#celia facilier#harry hook#dizzy tremaine#chad charming#doug (descendants)#gil (descendants)#jane (descendants)
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I was feeling agitated and artblocked yesterday so I decided to give my brain a rest by watching TV and then the next thing I knew these were in front of me
#what did they put in Phineas and Ferb that inspires these sort of deranged comics in people. this is my own personal MOM HOLY FUCK#long post
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miku but she’s in a medieval manuscript
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glad that im not popular enough to have an evil shadow version of my blog that exists just to make contradictions on my posts
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Bill’s cringefail attempt at a serenade
#my art#digital art#gravity falls#bill cipher#stanford pines#billford#I guess#in the toxic divorced exes sort of way
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If my mom sees a significant amount of blood she gets lightheaded, and has fainted on some occasions. Once it happened when we were kids, I wasn't there to witness it but I heard the story from my dad. Basically my brothers, around 7 or 8 at the time, were playing outside while my mom was making their lunch, and she accidentally cut her finger. It wasn't anything serious, but it drew a fair bit of blood and she passed out. My dad saw this and rushed over, but he didn't really know what to do so he just sort of started slapping her to wake her up (not recommended, but he had no idea and panicked)
At that exact moment my brothers both came in from playing, and all they saw was our mom unconscious on the floor and our dad slapping her. So, like, without even saying a word to each other they both just INSTANTLY start whaling on him, like, full blown attack mode to defend our mom. Which obviously didn't help the situation, but she did wake up and everything was fine.
Now our dad says that he's actually really glad they attacked him over what they thought was going on, because it means he raised good boys. And I still think that's true, they're very good boys.
#i think about this story sometimes like yeah I'm proud of them for that too actually. good job baby brothers#they're not babies anymore of course they're turning 20 next year which is crazy#but they're still the type of people who'd do something if they saw something of this sort happen for sure#respectful of women and everyone else too. they're good guys#I'm glad I ended up with them living in my house against my will for like 14 years#anyway i have no idea where i was for all this but my best guess is probably a friends house given the time period#i was always at my besties house lol#i hope she's doing well too actually. haven't spoken in forever...#bestie from greek elementary school... if you're out there... let's get muffins and fanta at the bakery across the street again someday 💜☮️
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i'm not a dog and you're not a mare
#mouthwashing#captain curly#anya mouthwashing#my art#my version of a happy ending au sort of#dont worry about it my brain is full of bees
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I love how Gerald was trying to keep Shadow from spoiling anything about the future meanwhile literally everything Shadow says and does around Maria is the biggest death flag ever
#in fairness i’m sure both past robotniks just assumed her illness would be what killed her h a#sxsg#sxsg spoilers#sonic x shadow generations#shadow the hedgehog#maria robotnik#ark siblings#sonic#comic#my art#doodles#so this was pretty much entirely done 24 hours ago#but ironically was distracted from posting earlier by playing sxsg#and then watching snapcube play it cause her delight is addicting#i’m missing 2 chests and 2 bolts and I wanna see if I can pull it off without a guide haha#anyways now I’m thinking about the fact that maria and gerald probably went back to their time assuming maria would die of her sickness#and how that would change their respective behaviors#i bet gerald would be holding out that maria would still live a bit longer#just cause shadow inadvertently revealed he’s from at least 50 years in the future due to having met black doom before#(which rewatching cutscenes to remember this quote he Did try to play off a little bit with some sort of#‘oh what do you think the alien squid meant by ’this time i’ll beat you’ that’s so crazy’ comment)#so hey maybe it wasn’t a perfect cure but she managed to live another 10-20 years at least?#all the more reason to press harder surely!#meanwhile maria is coming to terms with her mortality at age 14 or whatever she is#frankly I bet she came to terms with it long ago the way she seems to be written#okay back to snapcube
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Thinking about the idea I had a LONG time ago about Mabel sending motivational and complimenting stickers for the boys and Ford saving a “write your own message” one just for Stan and had to draw it.
#gravity falls#stanley pines#stanford pines#stan twins#sea grunks#sketches#comic#my art#stan pines#ford pines#this was a stir of the moment thing#so it’s kind of rushed and not great but it was too sweet to pass up#also a sort of pick-me-up personally
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Tis but thy name that is my enemy.
#good omens#good omens fanart#good omens 2#aziracrow#ineffable husbands#ineffable spouses#aziraphale#crowley#anthony j crowley#crowly x aziraphale#digital art#my art#my fanart#i made the mistake of looking at Sergio Cupido's Romeo and Juliet#and this sort of just Happened#so terribly sorry
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yeehaw, baby!
#if u know me u knew this was inevitable#kon el#conner kent#tim drake#timkon#im gonna ramble after the boring tags ok#dc comics#fanart#western au#superboy#OK !!!! ITS TIME#so kon. obvs is a cowboy here#definitely a bit of a magnet for trouble but not an outlaw#still not the sort of person the son of the drake family's supposed to be talking to but yk kon's gonna try anyway#on tims end it pretty much follows the same events as the comics bc if it aint broke dont fix it#<- in terms of the whole sneaking out at night to do his own secret detective work thing at least#i have a whole silly story for the rest of it but im not gonna get into it all here lmao#but yeah i love cowboys and actual cowboy history vv much so this probably wont be the last u see of this au ദ്ദി ˉ꒳ˉ )✧#for now this post's rlly just for goofing around with design ideas#my art
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#TO CLARIFY ON THE SECOND POINT: VAMPIRES *HAVE* A REPRODUCTION METHOD THAT IS NOT SEX-BASED#THAT IS THE MAJOR POINT OF THAT ONE. THAT VAMP REPRODUCTION IS BASED ON CONVERTING INTO UNDEAD AND NOT PREGNANCY#what i think i keep coming back to is that a vampire is like. a form of pathogen or perhaps parasite#is the individual vampire meaningfully distinct from that? maybe#sort of a made up question#but that’s not a mammal#so neither is a vampire#but also like. a human is a mammal#this question sponsored by my friend who said she was done keeping mammals bc ‘they have so much fluid in them’#and my thought that a vampire Wouldn’t#not a lot of fluids. happening there
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Shout-out to the bumper sticker I saw the other day that made me feel one second of pure, incandescent rage, which I have replicated in complete accuracy below:
#something about the combination if the uwu-speak#the comic sans#and the black-white contrast#tripped some sort of primal 'oh I hate that' trigger in my brain
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some beach babes i started while i was on holiday <3
#bg3#baldur's gate 3#tavstarion#shadowlach#tav#astarion#karlach#shadowheart#i like to think even after they sort out the daywalker thing he's still v light sensitive and crisps after 5 minutes#also the first one was funnier in my head#when in doubt use your tiefling gf as a barbecue#shart isn't made for swimming she's supposed to float on a lilo for 4 hours and that's it
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for ages i thought i didnt like drag because of internalized homophobia but it turned out i just don't like bright lights and loud music and really visually complicated things
spd is homophobic i guess is what im saying
#i fucking hate live shows of any sort#every time my dad dragged me to one as a little kid i was miserable the whole time#i like to consume things from a tiny rectangle on my computer screen and nothing bigger than that
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doomed by the narrative no matter what
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