#my sister helping

[dreamerwriternstargazer]

Can’t decide if I hate myself or not for sleeping in

[notherpuppet]

Morning After

Part 2/4

Part 1 | Part 3

[heritageposts]

I'm writing again to bring attention to the GFM campaign of @salahahmed90 (Salah) and @salahmanarfamily (Manar), the parents of two young children in Gaza.

Here's an updated Salah posted last night, after he and his family were displaced for the sixth time:

Please help us, we are being subjected to genocide in Gaza. Hours ago, a house was bombed next to the place where we are and escaped death miraculously. Help us get out of Gaza in order to preserve our children.

Though Salah and Manar started out with the hopes of rebuilding, they've now made the difficult choice to begin saving up for an evacuation. Their campaign, however, is still very low on funds, and its been stagnating completely for the last few days, leaving them with barely enough for their immediate survival.

-> GFM link

The campaign has been verified by @/90-ghost.

If you can, please consider donating. Even a small contribution can make a big difference for the family.

Currently: €3,650 / €70,000

[bkyngw]

don't forget about him

[wolfertinger666]

i wish every trans person a very *beams yummy dinner into your stomach to help you feel better and give you energy*

[puppyudderly-dreamy]

i think the assumption that transfeminism considers closeted trans women as tme kinda misses the whole "transmisogyny affects us wether we transition or not" part of transfeminist analysis

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

[plain-text version of this post can be found under the cut]

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

Plain-text version:

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

P.S. Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[bixels]

The Piedra sisters.

Born and raised in a small mining town in New Mexico. Calida and María Molina have stayed behind to support their parents while Rosita and Madelina have gone off to pursue their dreams. Madelina recently obtained her Ph.D. in geology from Las Cruces College. Rosita works as a baking apprentice and entertainer in Ponyville, Nebraska. Madelina is the eldest, Calida the middle child, and Rosita and María Molina (non-identical) twins.

[chloesimaginationthings]

Vanny has a FNAF game question for Michael..

[regonold]

Danny gets deaged and heads to Gotham to find jazz at collage there's only one problem he knows where the collage is just now where jazz's class is

Enter one bruce wayne who genuinely just so happened to be there (he's pulling a brucie wayme stunt) seeing a small kid looking around worried so what does the serial adopter do? Well he goes up to the kid of course crouching down to ask if he's ok whats his name wheres his parents or siblings?

Now jazz, jazz all but raised danny she protected him from a young age and helped him with anything he needed and durimg her time at collage she had worried for him, with the amount of bull her parents spouted she wouldn't be surprised if danny up and left

So imagine her surprise when she spotted her baby brother de aged talking to some stranger and at that moment every instinct flared and she remembered every warning she read or heard about Gotham and she acted

Danny was just looking for his sister when some guy crouched down to talk with him after asking some questions danny heard a sound he was familiar with jazz running

Bruce really wasn't expecting to be kicked for trying to help a kid

Artistic representation of jazz kicking bruce\/

[james-spooky]

not even the magnus protocol is safe from youtuber drama 😭🙏

[gryffindraws]

digital painting of That Sister Daniel picture from the liveshow

[morganbritton132]

Eddie, on Tiktok: The worst part about being married to a teacher is that when they go back to work, you gotta help them get their classroom ready

Eddie: Which that in itself, not bad. Kinda fun actually.

Eddie: But all these teachers leave a bunch of shit out in the hallway for people to take and my husband won’t let me take any of it.

Steve, in the background: Because it’s not for you. That’s theft.

Eddie: Says the guy that stole a car

Steve: I BORROWED- *video cuts out*

[magpiekingdom]

Eyy bro look its Michael! Here to steal your sense of self, direction, and your bitches!

And also Gerry my beloved(he is bitches <3<3)

[peachebo]

ya all really liked my previous post about happyending!au for sl so here is another ennard with da cat!!

ghosts tend to attract cats really well...

[okartichoke]

Turnabout Sisters played poorly on stakes in tears of the kingdom