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#my senior year of college is keeping me really busy
sunfoxfic · 16 days
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do you read all of the fics you post to your feed blog? do you have any favorites?
I can't really say I read any of them! I don't have much time for fanfiction these days, and when I do read SxF fic, usually I'm reading stuff that's focused on Fiona Frost. For fic recommendations I always recommend looking through my AO3 bookmarks; you can search through those like you would any fic on AO3 (filter by fandom, character, ship, etc) and I do mark the ones I think are genuinely standout as "Rec."
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buggbuzz · 1 year
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semi-heavy adhd vent tw 🫢🫢
personally of the opinion that the worst thing about adhd is the subtlety. we joke abt how obvious and silly it is but its barely visible 95% of the time.
& u spend your whole life not knowing if the mental struggle you have doing basic shit is what everyone deals with or if something's wrong. even when you KNOW you have adhd and even have it TREATED you STILL don't know if you're having a normal amount of obstacles.
i've been on meds for two years now and i just spent a whole fucking summer semester not sure if i was having adhd burnout or if my meds weren't working or if i was actually just being lazy. i think its all three, but who knows! and now i have a final tomorrow that i have to pass and i dont know if i can because i could barely fucking do any work all semester.
this happens like every year/semester but this one particularly stings cause it was supposed to be really good this time!! lots of free time, one class to worry about, the best nd-friendly note-taking system i've ever used, lots of flexibility, and friends to spend time with. it was even a science class!! chem, not bio, but better than non-science, right? but apparently, the only way i can ever stay motivated and on the ball is if im chained to a super-stressful and merciless schedule. so i have to choose between my long-term success and my mental health!!
i don't envy neurotypicals for the weird fucking ways they operate sometimes but good lord fucking jesus it sounds nice to be able to do things. i feel like a loaded gun with a busted trigger; i have all these amazing ideas and well-thought-out schedules and all the passion and desperation to follow through, but my brain and body just. won't. do it.
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hannie-dul-set · 3 months
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the breakup soup — [y.jh].
SYNOPSIS. you and jeonghan get into an argument in the middle of the meeting. the rest of your organization’s officers slowly start to realize that this isn’t just about whether the mountains or the sea would be the better venue for your event.
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PAIRING. yoon jeonghan x female! reader. GENRE. lovers to exes to lovers, humor, romance, tiny angst, orgmate! jeonghan, college! au, a whole lot of forced proximity, only one bed inn room, a bunch of nosy men. WARNINGS. written breakup (obviously), so much swearing, many many dumb inappropriate jokes (divorce, fucking, diarrhea, to name a few), parliamentary procedures jargon. WORD COUNT. 15k.
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NOTE. after six, seven months, this this is finally out of hell (my gdocs). the soup is overcooked. holy shit. everything is written in the pov of a certain teener (excluding jeonghan and the mc. this fic is about them but no, you do not have access to their thoughts). this is super duper fun to write and i hope it’s fun to read as well HHAHAHAHA. please let me know what you think! enjoy!
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“TODAY IS SEPTEMBER 7, 20XX. THE MEETING WILL NOW PLEASE COME TO ORDER. Mr. Secretary, please call the roll.”
The words robotically fall out of Seungcheol’s mouth as he turns over the pages of his clipboard, marking a precise, red dot next to the word ‘agenda’ on the page. Another day, another meeting. He can’t wait for the moment he can finally retire from this god damned position. Every single time he repeats his presiding officer script, it feels like a digit gets added to his age.
“Yes, Mr. Chair. Please say ‘present and voting’ once your name is called to be acknowledged.” 
Wonwoo starts the roll call, and Seungcheol is desperately trying to cover his yawn with the clipboard, else Seungkwan is gonna grate at him again for dozing off in his own meeting— the aforementioned straightening himself in his seat when his position is called.
“Public Information Officer 1?”
“Present and voting.”
“PIO 2?
“Present—” says Joshua, flicking a paper clip across the table and into Vernon’s nth latte of the day. “—and voting.”
“Next. Assistant Business Manager.”
“Prese—”
“Okay, got it.” Chan brandishes a look of offense when Wonwoo cuts him off. “Business Manager?”
“Present and voting. Do we really have to keep doing this one by one?” 
Mingyu has a point, Seungcheol mentally agrees. But his god damned seniors wrote in the damned constitution and bylaws that every meeting of SVT (Society of Virtuous Timetravellers. He’s in the process of renaming it because your organization that’s supposed to be for history and culture is attracting weirdos instead— and two of them are Soonyoung and Seokmin) must abide by strict parliamentary procedures, so he has no choice but to suck it up and listen as Wonwoo continues to read out the succeeding positions on the attendance list, and it’s starting to sound a lot like a lullaby.
“Secretary, yours truly, present and voting.” The scratch from Wonwoo’s throat signals Seungcheol that it’s to zone back in. “Vice Chairperson-External?”
“Present and voting.”
Your voice draws Seungcheol's attention. He turns his head towards you and he notices the sheets of binded up papers you have in your hands, straightened with a few taps on the table surface before you settle them back down, a swell of pride when he sees what’s printed on the topmost page. 
It’s impeccably organized, the task he assigned to you only three days prior. Hell, you even have page tabs sticking out of the sides of every page. Your work ethic never fails to impress him. On top of that, you’re always so professional— able to separate your personal and org life with strict barriers in between because even though you and Junhui have been friends for ten years, your sharp glare holds no reservations when you catch him folding paper turtles with sticky notes right next to you when inside the meeting room.
“Sorry,” Jun breathes out. You retract your leg from under the table after giving him a discreet kick.
Anyway, Seungcheol has high hopes for you, and he’s eyeing you to replace him as SVT’s Chairperson next year (he’s already in the process of manipulating you into taking the job: the compliments he gives away aren’t for free). You’re perfect. You’re flawless. There’s no one else fit for the position but you. 
Which is why the next course of events comes as nothing less than a shock to him.
“Vice Chairperson-Internal?” Wonwoo calls out but is met with silence. He looks around. “VCI?”
No answer. You scoff.
“Alright, moving on. Mr. Chair?” 
Seungcheol stiffens, second-guessing what he’d just heard, but the near-invisible crooked twitch of the corner of your mouth proves that no, that wasn’t just his imagination. You just scoffed. A sharp noise laced with derision and contempt. That should’ve been the first sign that something is off.
“Present,” he coughs out, resigning his attention back to the meeting he has to preside over. It must be nothing. Even you can get annoyed sometimes. Maybe Jun is fucking around again and you’ve just had about enough.
“There are thirteen out of fourteen officers present, Mr. Chair. We are in quorum.”
“Thank you. Seeing that we are in quorum, it is now legal for us to conduct business. Mr. Secretary, will you please read to us the agenda for today’s—”
The office door swings open. 
“Sorry, I’m late!”
And Mr. VCI rushes in with his white coat still hanging off his shoulders. The meeting is put to an abrupt pause as Jeonghan hastily walks up to his assigned seat, trying to explain the reason for his tardiness. “Our lab session took longer than expected,” Jeonghan huffs out, dragging out the chair next to him. “Dr. Han wouldn’t let us—”
“It’s common decency to enter the room and sit down quietly when you’re late so as to not disturb the ongoing meeting. Especially when you haven’t informed the body beforehand.”
Seungcheol flinches when he hears the interruption of your sharp tone. His head quickly snaps to your direction before gleaning Jeonghan’s reaction. His friend’s jaw tightens but he says nothing. That should’ve been the second sign.
“Mr. Chair, may we proceed with the reading of today’s agenda?”
He eyes you carefully and, with a hesitant drawl anchoring his tongue, proceeds with the meeting while Jeonghan quietly settles into his seat. “Mr. VCI, you may send your excuse letter later for record keeping. Anyhow, Mr. Secretary, please read to us the agenda for today’s meeting.” Wonwoo does as instructed. The problem is, Seungcheol can’t hear anything that he’s saying. Not when his seat is exceedingly uncomfortable at the moment.
It’s not his seat. It’s the two people cornering his seat that’s the problem.
Cold sweat breaks out from his forehead. The air is stuffy. You and Jeonghan lock eyes for zero-point-five seconds and there’s a chill in the atmosphere that only Seungcheol can feel. What the fuck is going on?
“Thank you Mr. Secretary. We’ll begin with the first agenda— SVT’s Orientation and Membership Training. Alright. As you all may know, this will be our organization’s first event for the academic year, thus I am expecting everyone’s undivided cooperation in making sure that this event will be a success. We have already discussed the initial details of the event during the previous meeting, and we also distributed the tasks to the officers and committees.” He flips through a page and clears his throat. “I believe our Vice Chair External was tasked to scout for the venue. Ms. VCE, have you prepared your presentation?”
You nod, rising from your seat. “Yes, Mr. Chair. I’ve prepared a comprehensive list of all our options.” Okay, Seungcheol breathes in through nose. You seem normal now. Maybe he was just overthinking things. “I ask for everyone’s assistance in distributing the copies.”
Seungcheol looks at the text written in bold when you pass a copy to him— SVT ORYE & MT 20XX: VENUE PROPOSAL. While everyone is passing the paperclip-bound photocopies to each other, you take the liberty to start speaking. “If you look at the second page, you can see the overview of the entire document. I’ve listed five possible venues and compiled their respective addresses, rates, inclusions, menus, and of course, pictures for your reference. We’ll look at each of them one by one, starting with—”
You pause. Jeonghan is raising his hand. Your eyebrow twitches. Seungcheol gets a bad feeling. “Yes, Mr. VCI?”
“Thank you for the acknowledgement,” he says. “I’d like to ask why exactly are all of these venues located in the mountains? Don’t we have other options? It would be fine if it were just us officers, but I believe holding the event in such terrains would be far too inconvenient for more or less a hundred people.”
A very bad feeling.
“I appreciate your insight,” you respond. Uh oh. Your smile is strained and Seungcheol knows it. That’s the smile you wear when you’re about to pulverize a representative for a disadvantageous partnership to the ground. “However, I’d like to bring to your recollection that the theme of this year’s Orye is traditional South Korean folklore. That considered, I came up with the judgment that the mountainous and forested areas would be the most appropriate and immersive venue if we wish to bring this concept to life. I hope that is clear, Mr. VCI. Anyway—”
“It’s still impractical, Ms. VCE.” 
Your face stiffens.
Jeonghan just cut you off. 
Shit, he just cut you off. 
He stands up, leveling you from across the table. “What about our members with asthma? Heart problems? What if it rains on the day of the event? Do you expect everyone to climb up a mountain trail in all these conditions?”
“If you read through my document before inadvertently interrupting me, Mr. VCI, you’d know that three out of the five venues offer uphill transportation in order to get to the accommodations. And although I understand your reservations about the possibility of inclement weather, may I remind you that it’s also the driest season of the year. You’re being unreasonable.”
Fuck. Seungcheol thinks he needs to butt in but he can’t find the timing when there’s literally an invisible fucking electric fence deterring him from reaching the both you. He catches a glimpse of Joshua’s concerned eyebrows. ‘Do something,’ his friend’s eyes say. He’s about to until you drop a sentence that shoots the tension off the roof.
“Furthermore, I’ve surveyed all of the officers through text if they agree with my venue proposal and I was met with no objections. You’d know if you opened any of my messages last night, Jeonghan.”
Holy fuck.
Holy fuck, you called him by his first name. 
You never call anyone by their first name. At least not during meetings and it’s very clear that this is a reason for alarm because everyone else’s eyes fly wide open. Except Jeonghan’s. He just looks pissed— mirroring your very own expression. Something is wrong. Something is very wrong and Seungcheol is slowly starting to realize that this argument isn’t just about the venue conflict.
“Ahem.” He clears his throat for the nth time, a wound might break open. “We will take our VCI’s concern into consideration. If you believe holding our Orye in the mountains is impractical, where do you suggest we should hold it instead?”
Jeonghan’s shoulders relax. He gives you a momentary look before settling back into his seat. “Thank you, Mr. Chair.” You do the same. Seungcheol breathes out a sigh of relief. “I’d like to suggest that we hold it by the beach and sea. Not only would it be more accessible, it would also be considerably cheaper considering there’d be no extra expenses for transportation up the hiking trail. There are also more options if we hold it on the beach. I already have contacts from last year’s set of events. We don’t have to worry about negotiations.”
Seungcheol nods in response. He’s about to say something but once again, he hears an unmistakable scoff from your direction. “Of course, you’d go for the low effort option.”
Oh no. Oh god, no.
Jeonghan’s eyes dart towards you. “What was that?”
Seungcheol doesn’t get paid enough for this shit.
“I’m just saying that it’s so like you to go for the easy way out.”
He doesn’t get paid for this at all.
“What are you trying to tell me here, Ms. VCE?” Jeonghan’s tone is getting more pointed, and the rest of the table are starting to pick up on what’s going on. Mingyu is slowly inching off of his seat and finding the right time to book it. Chan and Seokmin are nervously flitting their eyes back and forth between Jeonghan and you. Minghao hao stopped paying attention. He’s got his airpods on and scrolling through his phone. 
“The sea is not theme-appropriate for our event, Mr. VCI,” you firmly press on. “There are myths and folklore that reference the sea and ocean, however as an introductory event for our organization we should defer from making far too uncommon references since most of our members are beginners to our advocacy.”
Vernon is about to be swallowed by his chair. Seungkwan has his face in his hands. Seungcheol’s phone vibrates and it’s a message from Wonwoo. Should I include all of this in the minutes? he asks. Seungcheol isn’t even sure if this argument is still about the venue.
“May I also add that beach events are overused. Everyone holds acquaintance parties, Christmas parties, sensitivity trainings at beaches and beach resorts. Should we follow that template, I doubt our event would be memorable enough for our members to remember.”
“Then it’d be the obligation of the program committee to make it memorable.” The said committee flinches upon hearing Jeonghan’s words. Joshua and Junhui don’t look like they agree with the additional burden. Jihoon’s forehead is wrinkling from secondhand stress. “We don’t need to sacrifice the affordability and accessibility of our location in order to hold a note-worthy event. And, may I also reiterate that we should consider our members with health problems, Ms. VCE.”
This is enough. This is probably enough. Maybe it’s time for Seungcheol to intervene.
“However, I understand,” Jeonghan continues. “I understand that it’s not easy for you to be considerate.”
But how the fuck is he supposed to do that when you two fucks won’t stop provoking each other?
“Oh, for god’s sake!” It’s hopeless. It’s gone out of control. Your voice has bordered on yelling ang Seungcheol himself is afraid of being caught in between. “Are you still mad about the cat thing?!”
What is the cat thing? What in the hell is actually going on?
“This is not about the cat thing and you know that.” There’s a ruffle in Jeonghan’s voice. He lets out a groan and throws his head back with his fingers digging into his hair. “Fuck. Let’s talk later.”
Yes. Yes, please just talk later so we can move on with the meeting.
“Did you just swear at me?”
Nevermind.
There’s a second silence. One second— until the corner of Jeonghan’s mouth twitches and he expels a huff of incredulity. It’s ominous. It’s a harbinger of uncomfortable destruction. “So swearing is crossing the line, but refusing to let me meet your parents and forcing us to keep this relationship a secret is completely justifiable?”
Well shit.
This meeting is done for.
Silence washes over the office once again. Wide eyes are being exchanged and not even Wonwoo is filling the tension with his incessant typing on the laptop. Chair, I don’t think I should include this part in the minutes, Seungcheol receives another message from him. Of course he shouldn’t. A relationship reveal isn’t part of the agenda. Neither is a breakup but he fears it’s teetering to that outcome.
It’s uncomfortable. It’s suffocatingly uncomfortable and Seokmin looks like he’s about to cry at any moment.
“Well,” you simmer. “I guess it’s not much of a secret anymore, isn’t it?”
“Damn.” Soonyoung receives an elbow from Jihoon. He gets hushed down very quickly to make room for another agonizing exchange between you and Jeonghan. 
“Is that literally all you have to say? You’re so insensitive, it drives me fucking nuts. This is why it’s so hard to keep seeing you—”
“Oh, so you think I’m not having a hard time? If you can’t understand why I had to do that, then let’s just stop seeing each other!”
“Fine, I’m glad we’re on the same page this time.”
“Great!”
“Great.”
“Your clothes better be out of my closet by tomorrow.”
“Throw them away, I don’t need them.”
“I will! Thanks for the suggestion!”
Things have now gone beyond the point of salvation and he can’t even interject to formally end this disaster of a meeting.
“Mr. Chair, I apologize, but I’m afraid I will be leaving early today.” Oh, so now you remember his existence. You’re fuming, slinging over your shoulder bag and haphazardly collecting your things from the table, and Seungcheol simply massages his temples and nods in acknowledgement to your sudden leave. “Please go through the document at your discretion and I’ll be respecting whatever decision the body makes. Thank you and have a good day.”
Just like that, you’re gone. Jeonghan also starts collecting his things. “My phone lines are open in case you need anything. Goodbye.” With that, he also disappears with the harsh swing and slam of the door, leaving behind another blanket of uncomfortable silence for everyone else to drown in.
Seungcheol sighs. He feels a headache kicking in. 
“So...are we having the event in the mountains or by the sea?”
He groans.
Is it too late to file a resignation?
*‎
The following week has been nothing less than hell for SVT (Seungcheol has yet to change to the org name. He’s getting there. Slowly. Fuck university bureaucracies). The Orye is fast approaching, so there are still a lot of matters to be settled— printing documents, processing permits, making calls. The venue dispute is yet to be settled. Mr. Chair instructed a team to check out the mountain and sea accommodations you and Jeonghan forwarded within the weekend to get a better feel of both options.
There’s still so much work, which honestly doesn’t pose a problem with Boo Seungkwan, one of the org’s information officers. He’s used to it, being a member of SVT since his freshman year and all. This workload is nothing to SVT. Nothing to you.
It’s almost like you’re a machine. Printing documents? You’re a one-woman printing shop. Processing permits? You’ve befriended all the office heads and one word from you will get the event approved. It’s basic shit. Completely rudimentary. Seungkwan has always been at awe with how you operate. But right now, the problem is not the work. 
It’s the work environment that’s the problem.
“Can someone pass me the stapler?”
Your voice cracks into the tense silence in the office like a cold blade, causing Seungkwan to flinch and look up from his paperwork. The whirring of the printer fills in the void left behind by your voice, with Chan carefully organizing the freshly printed pages with tight lips. You’re met with no response. He locks eyes with Joshua. The stapler is beside Jeonghan, who’s running through the program for the event. They share a look of dread.
“Where is the stapler?” You look up from the table. The clear stiffening of your face upon noticing where the damned thing is forces knots into Seungkwan’s temples. Oh god. Here we go. “Nevermind.”
The stupid stapler skids across the table. It’s been transported from one end to your end. Jeonghan’s eyes are glued to his laptop when he slides it down. Jun is nervously hovering behind him. Seungkwan wants to throw up.
“Jun,” Jeonghan calls out. “How many steps does it take for you to get from one end of the meeting table to the other?”
“I—I’m sorry?”
“Can you try walking from here to the other end of the table?”
Jun is sweating. He hesitantly nods and slowly creaks away from his spot behind Jeonghan, cautious steps towards your end of the table. Three steps. All eyes are on him. Five steps. Seungkwan is not religious but he’s making the sign of the cross. Seven steps. 
“Wow. Ten steps is easier and faster than I thought! Anyway, you can come back now, Jun. I have some questions regarding—”
Swoosh!
Something rockets through the air, missing Jeonghan’s face by a mere inch from its trajectory. Holy shit. It hits the wall behind Jeonghan and crashes into the floor. “My bad,” you announce. “I wondered how quick it’d be if I threw something from here to there. It’s definitely faster than just walking.”
Assault. That must be assault. This is insane. This is getting out of hand. Seungkwan can’t deal with this shit anymore.
“I can’t fucking deal with this shit anymore!”
As he says, the moment you and Jeonghan leave the office to attend your respective classes. Jun takes a hefty intake of air and everyone relaxes almost immediately. “Seriously. Why should we suffer because they can’t hold their relationship together?!” he fumes. “If they wanted to break up, they could’ve done it in private. I’m sick and tired of walking on pins and needles whenever both of them are around!”
Murmurs of agreement break out. If their Chair was here, they would’ve been scolded. Thank fucking god he’s at the admin office processing their name change. “This reminds me of the time my parents got divorced,” Soonyoung offhandedly mentions while fiddling through their budget plan.
Wonwoo narrows his eyes at him. “Wasn’t that also the time you started perceiving yourself as a tiger as a coping mechanism?”
“Yeah.”
“Jesus christ.”
“I agree with Seungkwan,” Minghao announces. He had just finished sweeping up the shattered stapler from the ground. “I can’t keep up with them anymore. Whenever I’m with our VCE I have to talk shit about the other. Why don’t we just lock them up in a closet so they can fuck and make up?”
A grimace creeps into Chan’s face. “I abhor the image you’ve just supplanted into my mind.”
Minghao furrows his brows. “Who told you to imagine them having sex in our dirty storage closet? Weirdo.” Chan is unable to say anything back. “Anyway, how do we fix this? I have to meet with Jeonghan hyung for dinner and I’m running out of bad things to say about his ex-girlfriend.”
“I thought the plan was to lock them up in the closet?” Seokmin tries to clarify. They’re all actually considering it. Seungkwan is sure they have a death wish.
“You guys can’t be serious. Didn’t you see Vice Chair’s face when hyung walked into the room earlier? She looked like she was considering murder, I had the fucking chills. We are not locking them in a closet unless you all want it to end with a dead body in our office.” Seungkwan pauses. “Thirteen. Thirteen dead bodies if she finds out we orchestrated it.”
“Then what should we do?” Vernon asks. “Get one of them to resign?”
“No!” Soonyoung interjects. “I can’t deal with another divorce!”
Jihoon’s face contorts. “They aren’t your parents. You didn’t even know they were together until they broke up.”
“Still,” Seokmin joins in. “I don’t want any of them to leave SVT.”
Jun presses his lips together. “I think I saw her drafting a resignation letter earlier.”
There is silence. Then the dawning of realization. Then chaos erupts.
“Oh no. Oh no no no no way.”
“We can’t let that happen!”
“Let’s burn her letter before she can submit it!”
“Nobody let her near the office!”
They’re all behaving like idiots, but Seungkwan has to agree. There is without a doubt that even though your breakup has recently put the organization into an uncomfortably tight spot— SVT would be done for if either of you leave. Seungcheol hyung can’t shoulder everything by himself. The both of you are the bedrock of SVT’s internal and external affairs respectively. Resignation is out of the question. 
“Heh. You’re all overlooking something.”
It’s a new voice. Seungkwan wondered when this fucker would speak up, and he’s making his entrance in a gratingly obnoxious way.
Mingyu is sitting on Seungcheol’s swivel chair in the latter’s absence. He slowly spins it around, facing the rest of the members with the pads of his fingers pressed together. “To fix a problem, we should find out the root cause first.” Seungkwan wants to hit him, but Mingyu looks like he’s onto something. “Nobody’s resigning. I have a plan.”
*‎
Jihoon didn’t want to have anything to do with this.
It’s not his business whoever from his orgmates are fucking around or have completely fucked their relationship. It’s not his business whether or not you and Jeonghan have the chance to get back together again.
“If your previous supplier didn’t scam us last summer, we wouldn’t even be out here right now.”
Yet that is exactly what he’s been tasked to do— to dig his nose into your business, on a hot day, while having to canvass printing shops in the district. But finding a replacement supplier for your org shirts is the least of his concerns at the moment because—
[Operation We Are Never Ever Getting (Them) Back Together: Kim Mingyu: any update??? have you gotten through her yet?????]
How the hell is he supposed to fish out any information from you about your relationship with Jeonghan?!
“But these rates are seriously unreasonable. I’ll put this one on the table,” you say, ticking off a box from your checklist and Jihoon is sweating bullets. “What do you think, Hoon?”
Sure, you two work pretty well together and you praise his competence any single time you get the chance, but that’s the problem. You aren’t close. Your relationship is strictly professional. Hell, your text convo is nothing but org-related and Jihoon doesn’t fucking understand why he has to be the one doing this job when he can give less than two shits about the situation. 
“Let’s check out the next place on the list first,” he replies. “I think the quality for this one is still better than the previous.
Dealing with someone else’s relationship problems wasn’t part of the job description when he got elected as treasurer. He’s got his own love life (or lack thereof) to worry about.
“Alright,” you reply with a deep exhale. It’s hot, and you’re getting tired. He’s also getting tired. Can’t you all just go home? “We’ll take a break first. Let’s continue after getting a drink, but where’s Mingyu? Did he get diarrhea or something?”
[Operation We Are Never Ever Getting (Them) Back Together: Kim Mingyu: hyung status report plz.] [Operation We Are Never Ever Getting (Them) Back Together: Hoshi: wow we sound like actual secret agents.]
Jihoon feels his head starting to hurt. “I’ll text him.”
“Thanks.”
Mingyu isn’t coming back. Not until Jihoon manages to get something out of you. According to Jun, you’ve branded him as ‘Jeonghan-allied’ (whatever the fuck that means), so there’s no way you’d be talking if that street lamp is hanging around. “They went to the same high school! I can’t trust bastards from Hyangnam anymore,” Jun quoted from you personally, and they all started wondering what your conjectured alignment for each of them is. 
However, Mingyu is functionally obligated to tag along with your canvassing venture today because he’s SVT’s business manager and Jihoon has all your org money. You’re here because you can’t stay put unless you’re directly involved in the task. Mingyu asked permission to go to the bathroom earlier to give his comrade an opportunity. That was forty-five minutes ago. Jihoon still hasn’t gotten anything from you.
“It’s an emergency, he says. A big one. Gigantic.” Mingyu never said that. Jihoon’s phone is a black screen. “Public toilets aren’t trustworthy. He went to his apartment. He told us to continue without him.”
You grimace with the click of your tongue. “Gross. Those god damned Hyangnam bastards. Let’s go. I need something cold.”
Time is ticking, his phone keeps on buzzing, and Jihoon grows steadily more restless by the minute. You two finish ordering and pay for your two lemonades with SVT money. “It’s the least this damn org can do for us,” you say. He fears you might actually resign, and it doesn’t do his ever escalating nerves a favor. How does he do it? How does he bring up Yoon Jeonghan without invoking your fury?
“Jihoon,” you call out, and he flinches. “What’s wrong? You’ve been spacing out since this morning.”
You’re both sitting on the nice leather seats of the air-conditioned cafe. Being out of the heat seems to have bettered your mood. Maybe he can wiggle something out while you’re pacified by the lemonade and cool air.
“So, uh,” he clears his throat. His knees are shaking. Shit. This is harder than processing your cash advance for the fucking orientation. He needs to ease it in. To bring it up discreetly. “I never really suspected that you and Jeonghan hyung were dating.”
Regret comes instantaneously the moment the words fall out of his mouth. 
So much for being discreet. Your face stiffens. Jihoon knows he fucked up badly.
“I—I mean, I’m not trying to comment on anything, I was just surprised to find out.” Dammit. Wrong move. He might get blacklisted like you did with Mingyu. He’s not panicking because their stupid operation might fail. He’s panicking because he’s gonna lose the bragging right of being on good terms with SVT’s intimidatingly unapproachable Vice Chair.
The ice in your drink clinks around. Jihoon squeezes his eyes shut and prepares for the worst.
“God. I can’t believe I dated him in the first place.”
Then he opens one eye. He sees you swirling your lemonade with one hand, the other used as a resting place for your chin before you take a sip from the straw and continue complaining. “I can’t stand him. I shouldn’t have let him sweet talk me into that first fucking date, that venomous bastard. His face is a weapon. I should’ve known better than to trust that face.” 
Jihoon’s eyes are now fully opened. He discreetly pulls out his phone from his pocket— the device still constantly buzzing— and opens his recorder app all while his heart is nervously barrelling against his ribcage from the remnants of his fear. “Did he like—” Jihoon presses record, “—cheat on you or something?”
“What? No way. He’d never do that.”
“Then,” he continues prodding. “Why did you two break up?”
“Ugh,” you grunt, taking another long sip from your drink before slamming it down the table with a thunk. Jihoon flinches. He secures his phone underneath the table, checking if it’s still recording everything. “Don’t get me started. You don’t get it, Hoon. He’s just so—”
Jihoon never expected you to just lay down everything for him. You just continue pouring and pouring everything out like a fountain. A fountain of dirty laundry and too many swear words that his audio recording might get flagged if it gets uploaded online. This...was easier than expected.
*‎
Seokmin’s eyes are narrowed at his senior— zoomed in and in focus as the aforementioned finishes talking to a group of SVT’s new members. He’s taken a step back with a stack of flyers pressed to his chest. He can’t miss anything. He can’t miss a single thing.
“Thank you! I better be seeing your faces during the event, alright? Enjoy your lunch!”
Jeonghan is giving them the copy of the program for your upcoming Orye and MT. Freshmen. All women, as far as his eyes can tell, and they’re all giggling after his senior bids them off. He’s never seen Jeonghan hyung smile at you like that. In fact, he’s never even seen him wave at you goodbye like what he’s doing right now. Has he moved on? Oh no. This is bad. This plan might be ruined before they could even conduct an intervention. 
“Seokmin, what’s wrong?” asks Jeonghan, snapping him out from the brink of a spiral of despair. “You don’t look too good. Is the weather too hot? Should we take a break?”
“N—no, I’m alright! Let’s keep going!” Seokmin needs to know if his hyung’s unnaturally sweet behavior was an isolated case. There’s not enough information in the air to make a solid conclusion.
“Well, I’m not alright,” Jeonghan grimaces. “The heat is unbearable. Let’s have lunch first, then we’ll continue. Go find us a good place to eat.”
A lump grows in Seokmin’s throat and he nervously swallows, watching as Jeonghan pulls out his phone and starts typing a message, to the SVT group chat probably to give them an update. Or to one of the girls he was talking to earlier. Shit. “Hyung, who are you texting?” he asks. Jeonghan responds with a pause, a suspicious smile, and tells him that ‘it’s a secret, hehe,’ and that he should hurry and look for a nice restaurant because he’s starving.
That wasn’t a helpful answer at all. Seokmin’s anxiety grows by the second. “What...what do you want to eat, hyung?” He should ask more questions later.
“You pick,” is Jeonghan’s reply with yet another grin that puts him ill at ease. “I’m placing my faith in you Seokmin. It better be a good place.”
There’s another lump in his throat. Oh god. This guy sure knows how to pressure people in the weirdest ways. And now instead of prodding around to figure out if his senior has indeed moved on or still has lingering feelings for you, he’s scrolling through his phone trying to look up a good restaurant— panic-stricken because god forbid he make a disappointing choice— while Jeonghan starts talking to another SVT member who just happened to pass by.
“We’re having it next month,” he overhears Jeonghan speaking, momentarily taking away his eyes from his phone just to see his hyung yet again looking and smiling at the org member with an alarming amount of sweetness pouring out of his eyes. “I’ll see you there?”
“Y—yes…!”
His observation is cut short by the buzz of his phone. A message bar pops up, covering the top of the screen and preemptively stopping his resto search.
[Operation We Are Never Ever Getting (Them) Back Together: Seungkwan: seok, do we have updates??? jihoon hyung hasn’t gotten back to use since thirty minutes ago!!] [Operation We Are Never Ever Getting (Them) Back Together: Minghao: I told you all this plan was hopeless] [Operation We Are Never Ever Getting (Them) Back Together: Kim Mingyu: why is noona telling me to take herbal teas and drink lots of water?????]
“So, where are we eating?”
Seokmin’s bones rattle and the phone nearly jumps out of his hands like a live fish.
“Talking to people is tiring,” he hears his senior lament with a long sigh. “Seokmin-ah, you take over after lunch. Let’s go.”
Go where? He hasn’t picked a place yet! Why are there so many food places around campus?! Jeonghan quickly starts walking and, out of even more panic, Seokmin picks a random direction, robotically taking the lead, brain overheating and eyes spinning out of focus until muscle memory lands them across the street of a hotpot place he frequents, just a few blocks away from campus. “O—oh, haha! Hyung, we’re here! Let’s—let’s quickly get inside, yes—”
He stops upon the realization that Jeonghan isn’t following him along the crosswalk. When Seokmin turns his head back, he sees Jeonghan staring at the place with a dampened expression. His first thought is maybe Jeonghan hyung doesn’t like hotpot. His second thought is maybe he shouldn’t be stopping in the middle of the road, so he quickly pads back to the sidewalk. 
“Hyung…? Are— are you not in the mood for hotpot? Should we go somewhere else?” Seokmin’s gut churns, devastated because he had just betrayed his hyung’s trust in finding an acceptable restaurant. What’s wrong with hotpot at Red House? Did he have a bad experience here? But his place is so good! He and Soonyoung and Jun hyung have been eating here twice a week, Wednesday and Saturdays, ever since you recommended the place to them as your favorite, and— oh.
So, that’s the problem.
You’ve probably eaten here with him too.
“No, no. We’re not going anywhere.” Jeonghan’s demeanor suddenly switches gears. He brushes past him with a sudden determined look, not looking back even when Seokmin calls after him.
“Hyung, I know another place nearby. We don’t have to—”
“Let’s get inside.”
Seokmin has no freaking idea how to dissect or interpret this reaction. Nervous steps follow his senior inside the restaurant, and a server welcomes them both and leads them to a table by the window. “Oh, you’re not here with your girlfriend today,” says the waiting staff after they’ve made their orders, and he sees Jeonghan visibly flinch in the middle of passing back the menu. Jeonghan simply responds with a stiff smile. Seokmin is sure that he had just screwed up big time.
Why did the server have to mention you? Why?! Now, he can’t help but look at the server with an utter look of betrayal as he sets the ingredients on the table. “Is...is there something wrong, sir?” asks the server with uneasy concern. Seokmin’s bottom lip juts out, shaking his head with a sniffle, and thanks the server with a weak voice and tone.
Jeonghan doesn’t appear to be faring any better. While waiting for the broth to boil, all Seokmin could do is soak up the steadily deflating expression of his hyung and worry that it might affect the taste of the food somehow. He was pretty sure Jeonghan is already over you, considering he seemed to be mildly flirting with the org members earlier and all. But now he’s not so sure. Not when his hyung is poking his chopstick into a block of tofu with a gut wrenching look of longing.
“Hyung...” Seokin makes an attempt. “I’m—I’m sorry for bringing you here, I didn’t know it was—”
“Seokmin-ah.” Jeonghan speaks along with the crank of the stove. “A gente world of advice: don’t bring up sensitive topics when the person you’re talking to has a weapon on him. You’re going to get in trouble.”
The sunlight leaking through the window gives a dangerous glint to the scissors Jeonghan is holding. Seokmin bites his tongue. Jeonghan cuts up the noodles and the two start eating quietly.
Seokmin loves eating. He really does. But this time, every bite tastes like hot sand, and he’s pretty sure he’s going to get indigestion afterwards.
He swallows down another mouthful with the help of a glass of water, and as he’s trying to get the mix of meat and vegetables down his throat, the sound of utensils that were previously clattering suddenly stops. When Seokmin puts the glass down, he sees Jeonghan seasoning the warm broth with salt.
The natural salt that comes out of your eyes when you start crying.
Holy shit, his hyung is crying.
“Sorry, I just— haha, the soup’s a little spicy, right?”
No. No it’s not. They ordered chicken broth. The soup isn’t spicy at all.
“H—hyung…”
Seokmin’s eyes are now also starting to water. Oh no. Oh no, dear god, what has he done? He didn’t mean to bring him here and reawaken stashed away memories. All he wanted to do was find a good place to eat!
“Hyung, I’m so sorry.”
This was a mistake. They should’ve just had kimbap and ramyeon at the nearby 7-Eleven.
*‎
“So, let me get this straight. One of them did nothing but talk shit about the other for thirty minutes, and the other started crying because Seokmin brought him to her favorite restaurant.”
The SVT officers (minus their Chair and Vice Chars) have reconvened the next day at the office. Their upcoming event isn’t a priority right now. The only thing on the agenda is the problem with you and Yoon Jeonghan— to which Mingyu is trying to wrack his brains in coming up with something in light of their initial investigation. 
“After listening to the recording Hoon sent, I don’t think she hates Jeonghan. She sounded like was just nitpicking in the heat of the moment,” says Jun. “If she’s still angry at him...maybe she isn’t over him yet? Maybe there’s still a chance?”
All eyes are on Jihoon, who witnessed your rant firsthand. 
“I don’t know. All I can say is that she looked a little sad while talking about him. She didn’t add anything else beyond the recording.” It’s not like the recording was of any help. Most of it was just you calling Jeonghan a son of a bitch, a piece of shit, and so on, as well as a few tangents about Mingyu that he himself didn’t quite appreciate. He thought he was your favorite. Like, why are you assuming that he’s on Jeonghan’s side?! They weren’t even friends back in high school! 
He spins the office chair in annoyance. To think he gave you a higher score than Jeonghan on your quarterly evaluation. Maybe he should ask Cheol to take it back.
“Well, if one of them is still on the hook, then there’s still a possibility that they can still get back together,” Wonwoo conjectures, eliciting murmurs of agreement from the rest.
“Does this mean we can finally lock them inside a fucking closet?”
“We are not locking them in a closet,” Seungkwan says. Minghao rolls his eyes at the dismissal. “We can’t do that. But we can bring in some forced proximity in a different way.”
Mingyu stops swiveling the chair. Why is Seungkwan looking straight at him? Wait. Why are they all looking straight at him? His throat tightens. He forces down a swallow. What, what, what’s the matter, why are they all looking at him?
“Oh no!”
Suddenly, Seungkwan starts a one-man drama. He exclaims, an arm jutting into the air before he lets the back of the loose hand drop onto his forehead, stumbling into Vernon who’s standing next to him.
“I just remembered I have a doctor’s appointment this Saturday— the same day where I’m supposed to accompany our Vice Chairs and Business Manager in checking out the venues! Oh no! I don’t think I can make it!”
Right. He along with Seungkwan, Chan, Jeonghan, and you are scheduled to evaluate each of the places on your list so that you can finalize the event venue. Not long after, Chan also breaks into a gasp, catching Seungkwan’s signal. “Oh my! I forgot I also, uh, have a thing on Saturday! What a bummer!”
“Then, I also—”
“No!” 
Mingyu winces. He’s shocked. He’s appalled. He’s offended. Why is he being yelled at?! Wasn’t he supposed to go along with the other two? “You don’t have a thing on Saturday, Mingyu. You have to be there to make sure that things don’t go wrong!” Seungkwan tells him, and at first he understands. He’s goes ‘oh, right, of course, yeah, sure,” but the moment what that situation entails finally dawns upon him— the fact that he has to be stuck in between you and Yoon Jeonghan for at least ten hours, maybe more— his blood runs cold and his face pales. There’s no way in hell he’s dealing with that.
“Why me?! Why can’t Joshua hyung go?”
Joshua answers with an offended look of bewilderment. 
“Hey, it’s your assignment,” answers Jihoon. “And it was your idea to try and get them back together again. You have the moral obligation to make sure this shit actually works.”
There is no hope to get out of this. They adjourn the meeting and everyone starts filtering out the office— not without giving him looks of sympathy and pats on the back before leaving. “Good luck,” Wonwoo says in passing. Vernon sends him a salute before closing the door. Damn him and his meddling ass. He should’ve just let your relationship die out for good.
The day of reckoning comes. It’s five in the morning at the campus parking lot, you and Jeonghan on the opposite ends of his car, and Mingyu already wants to tuck himself in bed for the day. You’re tapping your feet in impatience, looking at your phone with a glare, while Jeonghan pockets his phone with a sigh and welcome’s himself into the front seat of Mingyu’s car with a distinct slam. You huff and do the same into the backseat. 
Shit. This might actually be his last day on earth. Mingyu hurries into the driver’s before either of you yell at him to get moving.
“Tell Boo Seungkwan and Lee Chan that they’re getting sanctioned for this,” grits Jeonghan. Mingyu closes the door and prepares himself for an inevitable six to eight hours of hell.
“The kids are sick and you want to penalize them?” you interject from the back. Mingyu notices Jeonghan’s jaw clench. He shuts his eyes tight and whispers a few prayers. “You’re abusing your authority, Mr. VCI. Cut them some slack.”
“Negligence of duty. Section one under General Prohibitions,” rebuts Jeonghan, making eye contact with you through the front view mirror. “Failure to inform ahead of time the inability to do a task or assignment delegated to them shall be considered an act of negligence on the part of the officer. I’m not abusing any authority, sweetheart. I am acting well within my functions. It’s too early for this kind of—”
Silence drops. So does the temperature in the car which at this point feels like negative fourteen degrees. Jeonghan stifles a cough and rolls down the window for air. You look down and flit through the pages of the document you brought. Mingyu’s grip on the steering wheel tightens and he wants to cry.
“Can we go now? Please? We have six places to visit and I really don’t want to be driving until midnight.”
“We can rotate,” you tell him. “Let’s switch drivers after every location.”
Something tells Mingyu that if he lets your explosive temper behind the wheel, this will not only be the last he’ll be seeing of his cherished car that his parents got him as a gift for his twenty-first birthday, but this will also be the last he’ll be seeing of this mortal realm as well.
“No, haha, it’s okay,” he answers, finally starting the engine. “You two have been working really hard for this event so the least I can do is drive.”
“Well, alright. But there better be no more emergencies like last time.”
Mingyu still doesn’t know what you mean by that. Nor does he know why you’ve been giving him herbal teas and digestive supplements. Anyway, the three of you finally hit the road and proceed to your first stop— all the way to Daecheon, which will take about an hour if traffic grants them kindness. Jeonghan rolls the windows back up at some point because besides the ice-cold tension between the both of you, it really is getting cold, and the sky has been cloudy since earlier, and the weather app is telling him that there’s a twenty percent chance of rain. Literally all odds are stacked against him today.
He does live long enough to get through three venues, thankfully. The first one, near Daecheon beach, you complained that the rooms were stuffy and Jeonghan told you to sleep by the ‘goddamned beach if you wanted to feel extra fresh.’ The second beach location couldn’t accommodate your amount of people. The third one— the hanok-style villa in Gyeongsang which you’ve just finished surveying and which Mingyu thought was really nice— Jeonghan said that there’s too many bugs for it to be conducive. You told him to wear a mosquito net ‘you fucking princess,’ while walking back to the car. At this point, it’s already past four in the afternoon. The eleven hours of being trapped in a car with your ex-boyfriend is probably finally getting to your head.
“You really could care less about your members’ well being as long as we do what you want, don’t you?”
“I wasn’t bitten by a single mosquito there. You’re just making problems up to discredit my—”
It’s getting to Mingyu’s head, too. One more minute in this enclosed space with the both of you and he’s jumping out the window.
“Anyway, let’s head to the next location,” you say with a sigh. “Woodland Springs Resort. Luckily, it’s only an hour away.”
Mingyu’s knuckles twitch on the steering wheel. “I can’t. I can’t do this anymore.”
He catches your face through the mirror, brows furrowed with a frown. “Mingyu, let me drive this time. You’ve been at it for hours.” 
“She’s right. Go sit in the back, we can take over.”
He has. He’s tired and annoyed and exhausted by the constant fear that you two might actually make a murder scene out of his precious car, that he’s pretty sure that him driving would soon become a road-risk. It would be fine, right? You two have probably expelled your energy, anyway. Or at least about to. Worst case scenario is that Jeonghan hyung pisses you off and you’d expertly crash the car in a way that would only kill him and leave you two alive.
“Okay,” Mingyu weakly breathes out. “I’m gonna rest my eyes for a bit.”
He opens the car and gets out. So do you. So does Jeonghan. The three of you are out of the car. The math isn’t mathing.
“What are you doing?” you ask Jeonghan.
“I’m taking the wheel,” he simply says, already making his way over to the other side of the car.
“What are you talking about, Mingyu was talking to me.” You’re fast. Fast enough to swat away Jeonghan’s hand from the door handle to the driver’s seat. Jeonghan tightly presses his lips together and releases a huff of air. You look at him with sharp eyes with no intention of moving. Mingyu is literally, physically, and positionally caught in between this shit and he wishes he should’ve just floored it.
“I’m driving,” Jeonghan asserts. “You look barely awake, yourself. Do you plan on crashing us or something?”
The worried undertone completely flies over your head. “Are you saying I’m a bad driver?” Mingyu really doesn’t want to witness this argument at this proximity right now. Jeonghan sighs and digs into his hair.
“No, I just want you to—”
Cr—ack! Boom!
Suddenly, there’s thunder.
And when there’s thunder, there’s rain.
Pshhhhhhh!
“Oh, for fuck’s sake!”
“Hurry and get in, let’s go—”
Mingyu really wanted to yell at that moment. Thankfully, the sky beat him to it.
It starts pouring. The three of you scramble back into the car.
All things considered, you all decided that it’d be too dangerous to stay on the road, taking into account the weather and exhaustion and all, so you looked for a nearby inn through Google Maps and Jeonghan drove you there (yes, he won in the end and you’re still bitter in the backseat). 
Boom! Another round of thunder, and the rain just continues to pour harder and harder. At this rate, you guys won’t be able to check out the rest of the locations today. Meaning, his prison sentence is bound to be extended. God freaking dammit. Mingyu continues to bitterly lament while rushing into the cabin inn. The door jingles upon entry. He lets out a sigh of relief upon being saved from the rain.
“Hi, good evening! Do you still have any rooms available?”
You’re there at the front desk doing your thing, being the externals head and all, while he and Jeonghan wait behind, damp and uncomfortable. He can see his hyung getting more and more impatient by the second, tapping his wet soles against the wooden flooring with his arms crossed. Mingyu can only sigh and hope to take a meditative shower soon, once you’ve booked the three of your rooms.
“Ah, yes,” says the lady behind the front desk. She looks at you, then spares a glance at him and Jeonghan in all their soggy glory, before flitting her eyes back at you. Okay what the hell. He knows they look terrible right now, but that was just rude. “Will it be for the three of you? Unfortunately, we only have one room left available, ma’am, peak season and all, and it’s only good for two people.
“That’s fine, we’ll take—”
“Oh, I’m sorry,” Judgemental Front Desk Lady interrupts. “I meant a maximum of two people can occupy the room. It’s our policy.”
Well that’s stupid. The hell were you guys supposed to do, then? Run back to the car, get even more wet in the process, and look for another place to stay in this stupid weather? Mingyu can practically see a vein throbbing on the back of your head. He catches your shoulders lift and drop along with an exhale, a momentary pause before you respond. “Can’t you make an exemption? The weather is terrible outside and we really need a place to stay for the time being.”
Mingyu decides to look over and see how the other ticking time bomb is faring, but when he leers over to the side, Jeonghan is no longer beside him. Wet footsteps against wooden floors can be heard. He snaps his head back to the front desk and sees his hyung walking up to you— placing his arm around your freaking waist when he lands next to you, and alarm bells suddenly go off in Mingyu’s head.
“Babe, what’s the problem?”
Goosebumps prick all over his body.
What. 
What the fuck? 
“What’s wrong?”
Mingyu rubs his eyes, thinking that he just saw (and heard) wrong, but no. Yoon Jeonghan has indeed reigned claim over your waist. The fuck? He refocuses into your expression, expecting you to look disgusted and send a kick to his hyung’s shin, but that doesn’t happen. Instead, you flash a look at Jeonghan, then back to the receptionist, peering down at the desk surface where her hand is resting, before looking back up at Jeonghan and nudging yourself closer to him with a sigh. What in the everloving fuck is going on?
“They’re saying that only two people can stay inside the room,” you lament. “This trip really isn’t working out for us. After our disaster of a honeymoon, the last thing I thought would happen was for us to get stranded in Gyeongsang in the middle of a storm.”
“Let’s just go look for another place to stay, sweetheart.” 
“But it’s pouring outside! I can’t let you drive in the weather. It’s too dangerous.”
Honeymoon? What? What the hell is this improv sketch? Why the fuck is his hyung giving you the lovestruck eyes and why are you letting him look at you with lovestruck eyes? Why are you lovestruck-eyeing him back?
“Oh, you’re newlyweds?” asks the receptionist, and Mingyu didn’t think his eyebrows could scrunch up any further until he heard Jeonghan agree.
“We just got married last week,” he says with a sickeningly sweet tone. 
“How lovely!”
“Actually, we just came back from our honeymoon at Geoje Island,” you add. “It’s a long trip, and we wanted to get home as soon as possible, but that...wasn’t exactly an option for us.” Suddenly, you turn your head back to look at him. Now, you’re all looking at him. Why are you all looking at him? This is fucking scary.
You lean into Jeonghan and whisper something into his ear. A look flashes on Jeonghan’s face. He doesn’t like this look.
“Brother, can you please give us a moment?”
There’s a pause. Mingyu’s mouth is hanging slightly ajar and he hesitantly points to himself. Brother? Me? Jeonghan nods and smiles and returns his attention back to you and the receptionist. The three of you are talking about something. In a significantly lower volume. While sending him looks of remorse in between. What the hell are you two bullshitting about now?
Not long after, Mingyu sees the lady drop a room key into your hands and sends you off with a smile. “Second floor. Thank you, and have a great evening!”
“Thanks!” 
Mingyu isn’t exactly sure what just happened or how it happened, but at least you have a place to stay for the night? When the three of you hike up the stairs and spot the room with 203 labeled on the door, Mingyu decides that he needs to know what you fuckers talked about. “How did you do it?” He blocks the door before you could open it. “I thought only two people could use this? How did you get us the room?” Jeonghan and you exchange a look before relenting.
“Your fiance called off your engagement and you were so depressed that you followed us all the way to our Geoje,” you blankly respond.
“Our parents are on vacation so you couldn’t go to them. We were kind enough to let you third wheel on our honeymoon,” adds Jeonghan. Mingyu blinks. “But on the way back it started raining, so we’re stuck here for the moment. We noticed a wedding ring on Soonja’s finger, so it was pretty easy to get her sympathy.
Soonja. You even know the lady’s name, holy fuck. At least that explains the pitiful looks sent his way. But Mingyu is still very much perturbed. The hairs on his arms are still standing. “You two are con artists,” is all he can say back.
You roll your eyes and toss the key to him. “Hey, it got us the room.”
“Right,” Mingyu grunts, catching it mid-air. “You’re both so good at lying, even I’m starting to think you’re still married.”
The doorknob clatters open. You and Jeonghan quickly jump away from each other, and Jeonghan loses the steady hold he had around your waist since earlier. Mingyu stifles a grin. The alarm and embarrassment on both of your faces makes this day’s worth of stress all worth it. 
“Hurry up and get in! I need a shower and a change of clothes, gosh.”
Fortunately, you three prepared extra articles of clothing for the trip, having anticipated sweat from the heat instead of getting pissed on by the rain clouds. Unfortunately, Mingyu lost at rock paper scissors so he gets to shower last. “There’s a drying rack in the bathroom,” you tell them upon exiting, a towel to your head before plopping down on the bed next to the window. 
When Mingyu finishes showering, he hears you and Jeonghan arguing over something again. Cheol’s voice can be heard somewhere too. Upon re-entering the room, he spots you two occupying the floor right by the bed, a laptop sitting on the mattress that’s showing a very tired Seungcheol trying to cut in between your yelling.
“In hindsight, I think the beach in Daecheon is our best option. The kids can run around more freely there.”
“No, you were right about the mountains. The hanok-style villa is better suited for our event theme. We can just add bug repellent to our budget plan.”
“Listen to me for a second—”
“You’re the one who’s not—”
“This could have been an email,” says Seungcheol’s choppy voice thanks to the shitty reception. Yeah. Mingyu isn’t dealing with this. Over twelve hours of being a third party to your arguments is already enough, thank you very much. He drops down the unoccupied bed, already getting comfortable, and uses the nonstop swearing next to him as a lullaby.
Weird enough, it’s an effective lullaby because Mingyu slept like a rock. He yawns, stretches out of bed thanks to the early morning light through the curtains waking him. It’s clear out. The windows have watery dots painting it from the aftermath of the rain.
It’s pretty outside, Mingyu notices, but there’s something more eye-catching than the pretty natural scenery of the mountainside.
The laptop is still on and laying on the bed, pushed further to the edge with a low battery notification obscuring the open document of the event’s program that he’d seen Jeonghan preparing in the car yesterday. But what’s occupying most of the mattress is the both of you— you and Jeonghan— with your printed documents scattered around, surrounding a sight that he probably isn’t meant to see.
You’re laying on Jeonghan’s arm as a pillow, face turned to the side and slightly tucked into chest. Jeonghan’s chin is buried into the top of your head, his legs tangled with yours and the blanket has been kicked off the side. The morning light is showering the both of you like a spotlight. Mingyu snaps a picture. The kids are gonna eat this shit up.
*‎
It’s the day of the event, and Choi Seungcheol has not slept a wink since last night.
There were some last minute things he needed to take care of. Game props, printouts, and powerpoint presentations he forgot to quality check until ten in the evening. Grocery shopping for snacks, and an error in the bus booking. The works. But none of that matters now. They’ve all been settled, everyone has made it to the hanok villa in Gyeongsang in one piece with no asthma attacks nor heart related concerns occurring, and not once had you and Yoon Jeonghan argued ever since last night.
To be honest, it’s freaking him out a little. He wasn’t the only one who had to pull an all-nighter. His two Vice Chairs had to suffer with him too and the both of you have been extremely civil to the point of unease. It’s weird. It’s eerie. Like right now, as you two are welcoming the lines and lines of members in hanboks and traditional attire with matching smiles and pleasantries. You run out of program printouts and ask Jeonghan if he has any left, he gives you a stack, and the exchange ends without even a scoff, a swear, a mock, or even a look of derision.
This is...ominous, to say the least. It’s like the calm before the storm. Choi Seungcheol cannot rest easy.
“What the fuck is going on with them?”
It seems like he isn’t the only one who’s noticed. Currently, it’s lunchtime. They’d just finished presenting the constitution, bylaws, and internal rules and regulations of the organization. Now, they’re queueing up the kids to the food table. 
Among the ushers are you and Jeonghan. Standing next to each other. You aren’t arguing but you aren’t talking to each other either. Joshua is the one who brings it up to the small group preparing the drinks right now— him, Soonyoung, and Vernon. If Joshua doesn’t know the reason for your sudden civility, then no one does. Junhui gets interrogated too, but he provides no answers, only confusion. “Wow. Wild,” is all Jun remarks. They have no idea if you two have made up, have settled your differences, have gotten back together, or all of the above.
It’s fucking with him, especially after weeks of being perpetually on the edge because of your cold war. Seungcheol calls Mingyu to a corner while everyone else is in the midst of preparing for the next part of the program. Mingyu jogs over, mildly scared and mildly confused.
“Hyung,” he calls out. “What’s up?”
“Our two Vice Chairs,” Seungcheol starts. He looks over at the center field where the members are sitting. Chan and the rest are still handing out the paper slips. He can still interrogate Mingyu. “You went with them for location scouting. Did something happen between them?”
Mingyu looks taken aback. “Uh.” He stiffens. Seungcheol narrows his eyes at him.
“Kim Mingyu.” 
“Define ‘something,’” Mingyu delays. 
Now, this is suspicious. He definitely knows what that something is. Choi Seungcheol isn’t gonna let him off without squeezing the information out of him. “I don’t know,” he huffs. “Anything that could explain why they’re acting like—” 
Seungcheol points in a direction. Mingyu’s eyes follow the trajectory, and his gaze lands on a very alarming scene: Yoon Jeonghan sitting on one of the monoblocks, Yoon Jeonghan seeing you pass by, Yoon Jeonghan standing up, Yoon Jeonghan stopping you with a tap on your shoulder, Yoon Jeonghan offering his seat to you, Yoon Jeonghan leaving the scene and busying himself with some other task, after you had taken his seat.
“Like that?”
Mingyu is now sweating. “Uhhhh,” he hesitantly drawls. Then his eyes dart around. Until he spots Seungkwan pass by with a stack of boxes. “Can I talk to my lawyer first?”
“Mingyu.”
“Let’s—let’s—let’s get back to work, hyung! I have to go—”
He attempts to chase Kim Mingyu down. Attempts. Because Mingyu suddenly has the speed of a track and fielder and drags Seungkwan away into the accommodation building, the hanok, and he’s suddenly pulled back by Chan, who’s holding a box containing two or three small pieces of folder up papers. “Hyung,” Chan starts. “It’s your turn to pick.”
Seungcheol furrows his brows. Drat. Kim Mingyu has escaped. “Pick what?”
“Your manito. Duh,” Chan answers. It’s the box he’s been passing out since earlier— a box filled with the names of all the attendees and whoever you pick out, you’re tasked to take care of them throughout the entire trip and pay them special attention. For relationship building, according to Jeonghan, when he pitched the idea. Seungcheol is aware of this mini activity, but he didn’t know he’d be participating. He stares at the remaining three papers. “Hurry up. I still have to give the rest to Seungkwan and Mingyu hyung.”
“Show me some respect,” he scolds, picking out a random name. “They ran inside. Storage, I think.”
Chan hums in acknowledgement and takes the box away. When he’s left, Seungcheol rolls open the piece of paper. Looking at the members gathered around the field right now (who are listening to the intermission number prepared by Seokmin and Jihoon) he notices that a few of the kids are already getting pretty chummy. He sighs, pretty sure that he picked out a new member that’s most probably three years younger than him. How is he supposed to overcome the generation gap? Won’t the kid find it weird if this old man suddenly starts acting close?
Much to his initial relief, a familiar name greets him. Yours, in big bold letters. That’s...that’s pretty doable. His favoritism for you is already blatant to the point that Soonyoung gets jealous. You’d been working hard since, well— the moment you’ve been a member of fucking SVT. He can just tell you to sit and rest and transfer your tasks over to the other guys.
“Hey.”
Seungcheol calls out to you, who’s sitting on the seat Jeonghan gave away earlier. Seokmin and Jihoon are hyping up the crowd (mostly Seokmin), but you’re hunched over in your seat, massaging your temples while looking over a document. “Chair,” you snap up, visibly tired and stressed (and unrested, by the way). “A few members are absent, so the number of members for each group for the team building later are mismatched. Should we keep it as is, or should we transfer some of them?”
A pang of guilt hits him. Christ, he’s been taking advantage of your competence and diligence. “Transfer, but leave that list with me. I’ll take care of it.” He lays a hand on your shoulder, urging you to go rest inside one of the hanoks for now. “You didn’t even nap on the bus. Go get some sleep. I’ll ask one of the guys to wake you before team building.”
You look up at him, smiling. Oh, his poor successor. He’s been overworking you to the bone. “Will do, Chair. Thanks.”
He mirrors your smile, watching fondly as you walk into one of the houses. It’s all warm and sweet. Until it’s not.
Seungcheol jolts. He feels a chill run down his spine. What the fuck? 
He whips his head around, startled by the sudden cold flash. Then, from a few feet away, he spots Jeonghan, preparing the multicolored handkerchiefs for the team building, but has stopped arranging them by color because he is glaring daggers at him. Hello? What in the world? He’s about to approach, but then he staggers in his steps upon seeing you pass by Jeonghan’s station. 
Jeonghan stops working, circling from behind the station to say something to you. You say something back— something that’s enough to tighten Jeonghan’s expression, and Seungcheol knits his brows. He can’t hear what you two are talking about, but he’s pretty sure it’s an argument. Oh god. It is an argument. You’ve got your angry face on and Jeonghan is raking his hair. Oh no. You two have been so well-behaved. You’ve been getting along so, so well lately. Is he at fault for ruining your peace?! How was he supposed to know your ex-boyfriend is a jealous bastard?! He was just doing his task and being nice to you!
“There goes all our progress.”
Seungcheol snaps his head back to see Jun. He’s sipping on a juice box, a leftover from lunch. There’s a good amount of disappointment in his face. “Pro—progress?” 
Junhui pulls down the juice from his mouth, shaking his head. “Hyung. You’ve ruined everything.”
Now, what the fuck is this cryptic bullshit? Jun just walks away, leaving even more crumples in Seungcheol’s brain. Seokmin and Jihoon’s performance is about to end, the mic screeches, and an applause breaks out, but he’s still debating on what to do. Should he pry information out of Jun? Or run after the both of you? However, he gets to do neither because at the end of the intermission, Seokmin does something off-course.
He’s supposed to pass the mic to Seungkwan by now, to announce the short break before team building. But Seungkwan isn’t here, and Seokmin is still holding the mic, and the crowd is still cheering. He meets eyes with Seokmin onstage. A bad feeling hits his gut. And since the breakup meeting that happened a few weeks ago, Seungcheol has learned that whatever his gut is feeling is unquestionably correct.
“The show isn’t over yet! Let’s give it up to our dependable, hot, and arguably aging Chairperson— Choi Seungcheol! Woohoo!”
This.
This was not part of the program that he remembers approving.
“Choi Seungcheol! Choi Seungcheol! Choi Seungcheol!”
This was definitely not part of it at all.
“Again, give it up for Mr. Chair!”
Illit’s Magnetic, Viviz’s Maniac, and KIOF’s Midas Touch later (with his face mimicking a red and ripe cherry), Seungcheol was finally allowed off the stage. “Wow! That’s our Chair, everybody! Who knew he was hiding this kind of charm?” Seungcheol wants to die. Seokmin’s voice is cheery in the microphone, but his officer suddenly turns his face away from the mic to whisper something to him. “Hyung,” Seokmin’s voice is suddenly grave. “I got a text from Seungkwan. He says he can’t find the VCs.”
Oh, fuck this. He’s going to kill himself.
“Tell—tell the kids we’re gonna have some free time first before proceeding to the team building.” Seokmin nods. Seungcheol’s face is still very very hot, but he swallows the embarrassment aside for now to deal with this problem. You and Yoon Jeonghan can’t just disappear. You’re both leading two teams for the games. Well. Maybe he can give you a pass, but Jeonghan is still needed out there. He feels unreasonably wronged by him too for that glare earlier. 
Seungcheol marches into the hanok. He spots an equally stressed looking Seungkwan inside the living area. Mingyu and Jihoon are there, too. So are Joshua, Vernon, and Chan. Why are they all here? They’re supposed to be preparing for the team building. These kids are slacking.
He’s gonna give them an earful later. For now, there’s a bigger issue to solve. “Where are the two?” 
“We don’t know!” Seungkwan exclaims. “We’ve been looking for them too.”
He hears a sniffle come from one of them. It’s from Soonyoung. “The last I’ve seen them, they were arguing.” Seungcheol gulps. Maybe…by any chance…that may have been his fault? “This happened with my parents too. And they came back with divorce papers.”
“Stop projecting your unresolved familial trauma onto them,” Jihoon sighs. “They aren’t your parents.”
“I’ve sent a text to Wonwoo and Minghao hyung,” Vernon brings up. “Maybe they’ve seen them.”
At that moment, Minghao enters the living area. Seven heads snap to his direction. Minghao stops in his tracks. “What?” He looks awfully relaxed, not looking as though he had just dealt with two ex-lovers who say they hate each other and that it’s over, but have too much sexual tension for their assertion to be believable. In fact, he looks quite at peace. Satisfied, even. Accomplished. This is fucking suspicious. “Isn’t it time for the team building activities?”
“Hao,” Seungcheol starts. “Have you seen the two Vice Chairs?”
Minghao looks at them. There’s a pause of anticipation. There’s literally no reason for this suspense build-up. “Oh,” Hao exhales. Why are they all waiting for the pin to drop? “I did.”
What they hear next, they never could have been prepared for. 
“I locked them in a closet.”
The pin has dropped. 
Seungcheol is the first to speak up. 
“You...you what?” he starts. “Come again?”
“They were arguing,” Minghao shrugs. “I got annoyed.”
Seungkwan’s mouth is hanging open. “You— you got annoyed,” he stammers. “So you…”
“Locked them in a closet,” Minghao finishes. “Yeah.”
It doesn’t hit them at first. Then it does. It hits them hard.
They all exchange looks. In a matter of soundless seconds, they immediately run to the direction Minghao just came from. What does he mean he locked you and Jeonghan in the closet, why would he lock you two in the closet, locking you two in the closet is a recipe for shit-eating disaster, does he want Yoon Jeonghan to fucking die?
“Shit, what if Jeonghan hyung is dead?”
At least they’re all on the same page. They come to a screeching halt upon reaching the room at the end of the hallway, but there is no sign of either of you. The only semblance of humanity within the vicinity is Wonwoo, who is sitting at a table, headphones on, laptop open, and typing without a care in the world. 
Seungcheol’s eyes dart around the room. Closet. Closet. There’s an indication of a sliding door at the opposite wall. He walks up to it, hesitantly with shaky steps, his heart hammering against his chest. The others inch behind him in caution. Sweat starts trailing down from his forehead. He reaches out for the handle, one hand outstretched, and then—
“I wouldn’t open that if I were you.”
Wonwoo’s voice cuts through the tension. He freezes. They all look back at the man by the desk, unaffectedly writing his documents, the sound of keyboard clicking filling the gaps in the air. “Why?” Seungcheol chokes out. Thunk. Their heads snap back to the closet. He feels Soonyoung clutch him from behind.
“There was yelling from in there until a moment ago,” is Wonwoo’s simple answer. “I think they’ve moved on to something else.”
Another tense pause fills the room. “Who...who was yelling?” Jihoon raises. “What kind of yelling? Why didn’t you check if anything was wrong?”
Wonwoo wrinkles his nose, momentarily taking his eyes off from the laptop to give their huddled group a look of disgust. “And risk walking in on them making out or something? No, thanks.” Then resumes what he’s doing. They all look at each other. Surely, that can’t be the case, right? You’ve got more pride on your shoulders than to fold for Yoon Jeonghan just because of some contrived forced proximity. It’s more likely that you’ve found an opportunity to strangle him. To kill him in cold blood. Which is why they’ve all run here out of concern right now.
“Why would there be yelling if they’re making out?!” Mingyu exclaims, concerned.
“I don’t know the kind things they’re into,” Wonwoo leers at them. “And frankly, I don’t want to know.”
“Then...what are you doing here, hyung?” Vernon prods. “Of all places.”
Once more, Wonwoo stops typing to grace them with an answer. “This is the only spot with good reception.” This feels like a fever dream. Seungcheol does not know what to do. His attention is directed back to the closed closet door, hearing another...thud coming from within. He locks eyes with Seungkwan. And then Mingyu. And then Jihoon. Holy shit. In his four years of Chairmanship over SVT, this, by far, has been his biggest obstacle yet.
The officers before him never warned him about this. What exactly is the best course of action here? What would result in the least amount of emotional, mental, and physical repercussions? Leave the door alone? Unlock it and witness horrors untold? There’s still an event they have to manage. Seokmin is probably freaking out outside right now. Yet here they are, watching the unmoving and locked closet door with uncertainty and caution, like it’s an oracle that will show them the way, that will give them a command to do something. Anything. And, much to their surprise and horror—
“Mr. Chair.”
It does.
“Would you please unlock the door?”
The oracle is wearing the sound of your voice? No, wait. It is your voice. From behind the door. “Holy shit,” he hears one of them hiss out from behind. Holy shit indeed. Seungcheol knows better than to test your temper. Quickly, he reaches out for the handle, clicks it open, and a force stronger than his slides the door gaping and completely open, revealing the dark and until interiors of the closet.
You emerge from the darkness. So does Jeonghan. Alive. Unstrangled. Maybe? That’s up for debate because there are some visible marks on his throat. Seungcheol pretends not to see. 
“W—welcome back…?” Soonyoung hesitantly drawls out. You walk out from the closet, Jeonghan trailing behind you slightly from behind. You’re both still wearing the in theme hanboks, but the fabrics are clearly disheveled. And loose. And Jeonghan is hooking his fingers on the hand lagging behind you. And looking at the back of your head with a concerning amount of heart eyes.
You don’t mention a thing about it. “I believe we are behind schedule,” you simply say. “Team building, right? Let’s head off to our posts now.”
They don’t say anything about it either. Seungcheol clears his throat, creaking his body back to the direction of escape. “Y—yes. Everyone is waiting.” The rest follow. You all exit the area except for Wonwoo, who’s still doing his work. When Seungcheol turns back to check on you two— you know, just in case— he immediately regrets it.
Jeonghan is still a step behind you. But he leans slightly forward, dipping his head down to reach your ears. His mouth moves, whispering something. A silent laugh cracks through your features. A laugh. Not once has laughter occurred since the beginning of this predicament. Not a. Single. Instance. You bump your elbow against Jeonghan’s chest. Jeonghan continues to move behind you with a thin smile on his face.
He sees nothing. They see nothing. They leave the house. They immediately scatter to inhale fresh, free air.
“Hyung! Oh my god where have you guys been?! The members are waiting!”
An unspoken agreement was formed. There will be no further mention about this occurrence. Not a single word. 
*‎
“TODAY IS SEPTEMBER 27, 20XX. THE MEETING WILL NOW PLEASE COME TO ORDER. Mr. Secretary, please call the roll.”
“Yes, Mr. Chair. Please say ‘present and voting’ once your name is called to be acknowledged.” 
It’s the first Executive Board meeting after SVT’s Orientation and Membership Training. The agenda for today is just a feedbacking session on the said event. Seungcheol yawns, not bothering to cover it up with the clipboard and Seungkwan sends him a dirty look for it. Wonwoo carries on with the roll call, one after the after stating their attendance for the meeting today. It’s the same routine for the most part. Seungcheol glances at the empty spaces on both his left and right. He taps on the table with a pen impatiently. 
“Secretary, yours truly, present and voting,” Wonwoo drones one. The two seats are still empty. Seungcheol digs his pen into the wooden surface. “Vice Chairperson-External?” 
No answer. Wonwoo continues.
“Vice Chairperson-Internal?
Still no answer. Wonwoo continues.
“Chairperson, Mr. Chair?”
“Present,” Seungcheol gruffs. God damn it, where the hell are you and Jeonghan? This feels like a rerun of their group traumatic experience last week. “Proceed.”
“Yes, Mr. Chair. There are twelve out of fourteen officers present. We are in quo—”
The door swings open.
You and Jeonghan enter in a hurry.
“We’re sorry we’re late!”
Again. Seungcheol feels the horrible, wrinkly slap of deja vu. His eyes follow while you and Jeonghan rush to your seats, out of breath and in a hurry. Joshua has stopped flicking origami frogs on the table. Seokmin and Mingyu pause in between chair spins. Junhui’s mouth is glued to the latte straw while darting his eyes wide back and forth, between you and Jeonghan. And Minghao cannot be bothered by any more relationship problems.
Wonwoo clears his throat. “Fourteen out of fourteen officers present, Mr. Chair,” he amends. 
“Yes, thank you,” Seungcheol sighs out. “Seeing that we are in quorum, it is now legal for us to conduct business. Mr. Secretary, will you please read to us the agenda for today’s meeting?”
Much to his surprise, the meeting proceeds quite...smoothly. Wonwoo reads out the agenda. No objections. They start the feedbacking session. No problems. The incident with the closet is not even mentioned. Not once. Not even a hint despite the shared knowing looks when Seungcheol asks if there are still more matters to discuss.
“No more, Mr. Chair,” Vernon confirms. Seungcheol nods. This is going awfully well. When’s the curveball going to hit him? When? “Thank you, Mr. Auditor. Since there is nothing else on the agenda, let’s proceed to announcements.” He looks at his clipboard. There’s only one thing scribbled under announcements. It’s not his handwriting. Seungcheol squints. “Lee Chan’s...pool…barbecue...dance party on the 29th?”
There’s a pause. Seungcheol looks up from the clipboard.
“What is this?”
All eyes are on Lee Chan. He looks like he enjoys the attention. “Lee Chan’s pool barbecue dance party on the 29th,” he answers, as a matter of fact. “You’re all invited.”
This is the curveball he’s been expecting. Seungcheol feels a knot in his temples. “How many times do I have to say this?” he releases a heavy breath. “Announcements on the order of business are reserved for org-related announcements. It is not an opportunity for you to invite everyone to your parties, nor to your outings, nor to your nephew’s baptismal shower, Soonyoung.”
The man in question swallows down a gulp. Seungcheol sighs for the nth time.
“I hope that is crystal clear.” He’s so done. He’s so tired. When is adjournment coming? Why can’t it come sooner? “Anyway, do we have any other announcements? Relevant announcements, rather.” Seungcheol sees you with your arm up. He feels a rush of relief. “Yes, Ms. VCE, you are raising your hand?”
You put your hand down, allowing it to rest gingerly on the table when you say, “Thank you for the acknowledgement, Mr. Chair.” You look like your usual self— in between smiling pleasantly and staring blankly. Seungcheol nods, prodding you to continue. You do. “I would like to put the matter of my resignation on today’s table, Mr. Chair.”
“Oh, yes, the matter of your—” 
A screeching halt. Seungcheol’s tongue stops working. He stares at you, wide-eyed.
“Sorry, can you repeat that?”
“My resignation.” You pull out a white, ghostly envelope from somewhere. His throat tightens. “I am filing it today and hoping for its immediate attention.”
It’s like time stops completely. The entire office is frozen. They wait for you to say it’s a joke. Any moment now. Please.
“Mr. Chair?” you call out. “Allow me to repeat. I will be resigning from my position as Vice Chairperson-External. What process do we need to undergo to finalize this?”
You don’t say it’s a joke. You are dead serious.
“No?!”
“Did—did I hear that right res—res—resigna—hiccup!”
“Breathe in, Seokmin. Breathe out. Yes that’s—”
“Why would you do this to us?! Why?!”
“Oh my god, it’s happening to me again, it’s happening to me again—”
“What do you mean resignation, what the hell are you talking about?” Seungkwan shoots up from his seat, slamming his palms against the table in distress. “Aren’t you two back together?! Why would you resign?!”
It’s a mess. It’s a room of hysteria and panic except for you, him and Jeonghan. Seungcheol is trying his best to...understand. To not throttle you and shake you violently because why? Where did he go wrong? Has he not been treating you well enough? Did he need to compliment you more? Do you need more compensation? 
Whatever the reason is, you’re looking awfully calm being the recipient of manic yells and hyperventilated cries of anguish. Jeonghan, too, is quiet. He’s just seated there, arms on the armrest, like he is in a completely different room altogether. Seungcheol narrows his eyes at him. Did he do this? Did he talk you into resigning? That bastard— how could he! Seungcheol’s heart is broken, not just once, but twice. First, from his dearest protege. Second, from his (formerly) trusted right hand man.
“Ahem.”
Before things could get worse (i.e. Soonyoung and Seokmin full-on sobbing and begging on their knees), you catch their attention. You look at them, calmly, and, with a carefully enunciated voice, begin your piece that brings all of them to silence. 
“I sincerely apologize for the trouble that our personal issues have caused to SVT,” you begin, a singular glance at Jeonghan. Seungcheol bites his tongue. Traitor. Evil man. Evil jealous man. “I am well aware that my recent behavior has led to some lapses in the organization’s operations, clearly seen in the management of our latest event. We have all heard the feedback, the concerns—where things went wrong. As you have witnessed, it is quite difficult for us to separate our personal feelings from our professional work here in the org, which was the root of most of our experienced problems.” 
That is not true! No one has the best work-life balance than you! Granted, there was an issue just earlier in the month, but Seungcheol can overlook that! He can overlook it as long as you take back your resignation, and take on his spot as Chairperson next semester!
“Which is exactly why I’m resigning,” you decisively say. Shit. “There were a lot of…ingredients that eventually led to the unforeseen outburst between Mr. VCI and I during one of our previous meetings. One of those ingredients was my affiliation with the organization. The rest of the details can be found in my resignation letter. Thank you for allowing me to serve thus far.” 
It’s like a needle pricked most everyone in the room and left them deflated. Chan looks sunken. Even Jihoon. Minghao just looks like he’d been expecting this. Kim Mingyu looks like he cannot accept this.
So he jerks out of his seat, springing to his feet, and points an accusatory finger at Yoon Jeonghan.
“You!” Mingyu shrieks. “Say something!”
“Hyung,” Seokmin adds onto the pile. He’s choked up and about to cry. “Are you just gonna let this happen?”
For the first time since, Jeonghan finally speaks up. But his tone is…sourer than expected. “What do you want me to say?” he starts. It makes everyone jolt. “That you’ve been overworking my girlfriend since freshman year to the point that we started arguing about it because she’s been skipping meals and sleep and taking care of herself just to manage the org?”
Even you flinch. There’s an apologetic look on your face, but there’s no denial. 
Jeonghan lets out a sigh. Oh, Seungcheol realizes. Oh. Oh, crap. Maybe. Maybe he and SVT had a lot more to do with your breakup that he initially thought. The workload. The shit you had to catch and bury with your bare hands whenever the org had problems, had too much to do, had one person in mind to fix up any messes made. Maybe they’ve been relying on you too much. Maybe he’s been relying on you too much and Yoon Jeonghan noticed that.
Of course Jeonghan would notice that. He’s been dating you under their nose for god knows how long. That explains why Jeonghan would suddenly act pissy towards him. It was whenever you’d been tossed in a sinkhole of work.
Once more, you clear your throat. “I have immense attachment to this organization. However, my priorities have shifted. I am sincerely grateful and sorry, but I hope all of you understand.”
It starts clicking inside each head, one-by-one. It’s slow. It’s hard to accept, but they eventually do. Seokmin eventually stops sniffling. Soonyoung stands up to give you a hug. This was a loss for all of them. All of them except you and Yoon Jeonghan. 
“Hyung, but why aren’t you resigning?” 
Jun pokes the bear one last time. It’s a question in all their heads, and Jeonghan’s expression alone isn’t enough to answer it.
“Jun-ah, do you want me gone?” Jeonghan replies, a little too seriously. They freeze. Then he laughs. “It’s going to be difficult to re-elect someone at this point, so I’ll be taking over some of her workload for the remainder of the semester. The rest of you should do the same as one last thank you to our now outgoing VCE. You owe her that much, at least.”
Before Jeonghan can start nagging, you quickly overtake his field of vision from his left. “Don’t worry, I’ll be finishing up my pending tasks, Mr. Chair. I will also be leaving some notes behind for everyone’s ease of—”
“What did I tell you about being more considerate to yourself?” the one from his rightbutts in. “These kids can handle it on their own. You don’t have to micromanage them. I’m begging you, stop overworking yourself.”
Okay, he sharply inhales through his nose. Seungcheol gets it. They all get it. No need to act all sweet in front of their faces and during org hours. It’s sending shivers down his spine. All of their spines. None of this spine shivering is healthy. “Please leave your resignation letter on the table. We will give some time for the other officers to read and consider it before making a final decision during the next meeting.”
You smile. “Thank you, Mr. Chair.”
“Thank you for your service, Ms. VCE.”
It hurts him to say this. It really does. You were the perfect successor. Now, who the hell from this pile of twelve men is he supposed to pick to be the next Chairperson? Does he have to— god forbid— retain his position?
Seungcheol lets out a sigh.
“Meeting adjourned. You are all dismissed.”
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the breakup soup. © hannie-dul-set, 2024.
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withleeknow · 3 months
Text
wishful thinking. (07)
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chapter seven: built to break
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summary: the instruction was plain and simple: no strings attached. but you should’ve known from the beginning that it could never apply to you and him.
pairing: minho x f!reader rating: 18+ (minors dni) genres/warnings: friends to lovers, friends with benefits au, college au; fluff, angst, smut; the gorlies are fighting...?, not much for warnings in this chapter ig word count: 4.3k note: i finally got off my ass and wt is finally back lol. i had a last minute change of plans and thought "oh! you know what would be pretty neat? if we prolong the angst so everyone can be sad for longer!" <3 and this is how i announce that the next chapter is not wt8 but wt7.5 and it's written from his pov <3 merry christmas
as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡
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I’ll hold my breath as I wait for your answer I’ll leave it up to you Tell me whether it’s yes or no Baby, love me or leave me tonight
Love Me or Leave Me - Day6
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The warning signs, they're there. You can see them before they materialize. You know your own tells.
Your metaphorical bags are packed, your shoes are already on. You're about to run again, leave a half empty house before it has the chance to become a home. No one has to tell you that you're a flight risk; you're well aware of it yourself.
Wednesday Min: got plans tonight? You: booked and busy with ze old canvas Min: tomorrow? You: same thing probably. sorry Min: u're working hard lately You: yeah this one is just driving me crazy and i need it to turn out decent Min: it'll be perfect. it's u
Thursday Min: running errands at the store Min: want me to bring u anything? that caramel popcorn u like?
Friday Min: don't work too hard. remember to eat
That was three days ago, the last time you'd heard from him after you left him on read. It wasn't a complete lie; this project is driving you kinda crazy and you do need it to end up a decent piece, but you weren't exactly holed up in your apartment to slave over your painting. And you suppose Minho didn't find it all that suspicious because you tend to do this sometimes - disappear for a couple of days and force yourself to focus whenever you had a project to finish, before you come back to everybody again. You've come back to him before; it stands to reason that you'll do it again.
It's been about two weeks since you'd seen him, though the memories of that evening are still fresh in your mind - the evening of the group dinner, when he'd kissed you goodnight and left for his parents' house the following day. True to his words, he did send you pictures of the cats - ones of Soonie wearing a matching hoodie with him, a few of Doongie and Dori napping at the foot of his bed. There was an accompanying text - The kids miss you - along with a frowning emoji, and it made you wonder if what he really meant was I miss you.
You wanted him to miss you, because you missed him too.
The photos brought a smile to your face despite the predicament you found yourself in. A smile that was short lived, a smile that was soon wiped off when you realized your heart shouldn't be swelling with that much affection for him. It shouldn't, but the truth was that it did and you don't know how to live with it.
Love isn't something you've ever learned to hold.
It's beautiful yet full of thorns, and your hands are too clumsy to ever keep it from slipping from your fingers.
You remember when you first met Minho. Freshman year, at some popular senior's house party.
It feels like forever ago when you were just an awkward freshman at orientation who didn't have a single clue on how to make friends. Jess was your first friend in college, and you'll always be grateful that you got along well enough that she adopted you into the group with the rest of the guys.
You didn't cross paths with Minho until you were already acquainted with everyone else. On the night of the party, you remember being enamored with him for those couple of hours, and it wasn't the side effect of too many solo cups of cheap beer. Who in their right mind wouldn't be infatuated with him? He was beautiful, absolutely alluring, and you would always tell him as much.
Back then, he had brown hair, slighter shorter than now but it was tinted with the most gorgeous shade of red. You didn't know much about Minho, only been told that he was pretty quiet and might be off-putting to new people. It was sort of true; that night, you were intimidated by the aura he exuded. Mysterious, couldn't be bothered, didn't seem to give a shit. He looked like a scary little thing, while you were the new kid who was only trying to observe everyone's dynamics, not wanting to overstep any unspoken boundary.
To this day, you're still not sure what really happened, how you two immediately clicked and he's been one of the most important parts of your life ever since.
Maybe it was just him. Maybe it's always been him.
Minho, the one who makes you smile when all you want to do is curl up and cry. The one who makes you laugh when you look for joy but the search comes up empty. The one who grounds you every time you lose your way. Your anchor, the safe harbor you can always return to. The light at the end of a long, long tunnel.
You don't know where you stand, don't know where it goes from here now that everything is changing. He told you so himself, that nothing changed for him, but how could he possibly know that everything is changing for you? And it infuriates you to no end because you don't even have anyone to talk about this with. You're the only person whose world is being turned upside down after all.
You can't tell your friends because they can't know about you and Minho. You can't tell Minho because what would you even say? That you think you're in love with him? That the implications of what it means are devastating to you?
For the first time, you regret everything. Kissing him that night, sleeping with him, becoming whatever this is with him. Letting down your guard and falling for him somewhere along the way and you didn't even stop to notice it. You regret all of the decisions you've made up until now, because they've only led you to the point of no return, the point of losing him. You made bad decision after bad decision after bad decision, until you couldn't anymore. All along, there's been no one else to blame but you.
Maybe it hasn't happened yet, but it's inevitable. You will lose him. You are going to lose him.
There's no other ending, no other alternative that you can imagine. You're going to leave because you're a coward and it's what you do best. You ruin things before they get a chance to hurt you. You leave because if you don't leave then you'll be left behind, and you'd rather not bear the brunt of it.
Now, when you think of Minho, the thought is always accompanied by a painful reminder - Nothing changed for him.
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When you get to the cafe, Hyunjin and Seungmin are already seated in a corner booth, three drinks in front of them, one of which they'd ordered for you before you arrived.
You slide into the seat next to Hyunjin, smiling at him appreciatively for the drink. There's still over half an hour before you have to walk to your shared class, over half an hour before Seungmin parts ways with you two to do whatever or whoever it is that Seungmin does on his off days.
"I still think it's Nara," Hyunjin says, casually sipping his iced coffee.
"Nara from your Lit class last semester?"
"Yup."
"Why?"
"I saw them talking at a party once."
"Okay. And?"
"And what? That's it."
"That's... all the evidence you have to back up your claim?"
"Pretty much, yeah."
You wave your hands in front of them. "What are you bozos talking about?"
"He’s still trying to figure out who Minho is hooking up with," Seungmin is the one who answers you without missing a beat, then he turns back to Hyunjin. "Anyway, it can't be Nara. She's dating Jaehyun on the basketball team."
The friend next to you flails his arms like a petulant child, like he couldn't have possibly seen this coming, like he was so sure that he had finally solved the mystery. "Great. I'm back to square one again."
You straighten your back and reach for your drink, tentatively gulping down the beverage as if it'll hide the fact that you've gone stiff the second this topic is brought up. You feel bad about it, sure. These are your friends that you're lying to after all. They don't have to look anywhere far; the answer to the secret is right in front of them.
"We're still on about that?" you ask in the calmest, most nonchalant voice you can muster. You usually consider yourself a believable liar (which, to be honest, isn't really a flex at all), but whenever someone mentions this little arrangement between you and Minho that shouldn't be common knowledge for anyone else, you feel like you're been put under a spotlight for the whole world to scrutinize.
"Duh," Hyunjin says. "You know, I'm kinda surprised that you don't know. You two are like, attached at the hip sometimes."
You give him a thoughtless shrug, your hands fiddling with the sticker on the plastic cup as you avoid looking at either of your friends. "Maybe he just wants to keep private things private, y'know? You wouldn't like either if all of us is suddenly all up in your business. And besides, what if it's just casual?"
Hyunjin scoffs. "Please, I'm an open book. I tell you guys everything. I tell you every time I hook up with someone."
"Yeah, but you see, literally no one needs to know that," Seungmin says.
The taller one only scoffs, waving his hands around dismissively in Seungmin's direction before he turns to you. "If it was just casual, would he save her name as - oh my God, I forgot what her contact name is. Freaking bird person or something."
You make a face. "What?"
"Dude, seriously?" Seungmin rolls his eyes. "You forgot one word? Dove? What is the matter with you?"
Perhaps it's the half-hearted teasing judgment in Seungmin's voice that makes Hyunjin take offense and drop the topic. The conversation veers off course when they start bickering like children in the busy cafe. You suppose it works in your favor, but you can't focus. You drown it all out.
Your hand is still on the cup but the sticker has been left alone and forgotten, half peeled off, half still clinging to the plastic underneath the condensation.
The single word repeats itself in your mind, over and over and over again.
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The entire time you're in class, you don't really focus on anything. You can't bring yourself to listen to whatever your professor is saying, not after what Hyunjin and Seungmin told you earlier. At some point, your friend has to nudge your shoulder to bring you back down to earth when usually, you're the one who has to remind Hyunjin to pay attention. Class ends soon enough though; time tends to fly by when your mind is lost elsewhere.
"What's wrong with you today?" he asks with his bag slung over his shoulder, slowing down his steps to match your speed as you walk out of the lecture hall together.
You scratch the back of your neck sheepishly. "Nothing's wrong. I was just tired."
"You wanna grab dinner with me and Felix?"
Any other day, you would've agreed in a heartbeat. But today, you want to be alone. Sometimes, you'd rather wallow in your own misery than settle for a temporary distraction.
You're still stuck on the conversation from earlier, on the small detail that Hyunjin and Seungmin had let slip in the cafe.
Dove.
His dove.
Maybe it doesn't mean anything. Perhaps it's only a nickname that he's assigned to you out of mere platonic fondness, but it makes you conscious about the dove on your own wrist nonetheless, the one that you feel compelled to hide from your friends underneath your long sleeve.
"No, it's okay," you tell Hyunjin. "I'll just go home and sleep it off."
"Okay. I can walk you for a bit," he says. "Just wait with me here. Minho's coming to give me back something he borrowed."
"Minho's coming?" you ask too quickly for it to sound casual. There's a panicked edge that you can hear in your own voice, though you don't think Hyunjin picks it up as he unlocks his phone and types something on the screen.
"Yeah, he was at the library. He's coming over right now, should only be a couple minutes. Then I'll walk back with you."
You shift on your feet uneasily, but you cover it up by rubbing your hands on your arms to pretend like you're just cold. There's no excuse that you could think of that would justify why you can't stand here with Hyunjin for just two more minutes, without giving it away the fact that you're avoiding Minho.
You take in a quiet breath, put on your best brave face. Casual, nonchalant. It's just Minho. Just Minho...
He comes up from behind, where you can't see him. A warm hand gently lands on your shoulder, and it takes everything not to shy away from his touch. It takes even more not to lean into his side.
You've missed it. You've missed him.
"Hey." He smiles at you while Hyunjin only gets a nod in acknowledgment.
"Hey." You return the smile, though you're sure you look a little rigid. You can tell there's an inkling of confusion in his eyes when he senses that your energy is off, but you're thankful he doesn't comment on it, at least not in front of Hyunjin anyway.
You don't notice the paper bag in his other hand until he hands it to your other friend with a simple Thanks, to which Hyunjin just nods along in a silent You're welcome.
"I was going to walk with Y/N for a bit and then meet Felix for food," he tells Minho. "You wanna get burgers with me and Lix?"
"No, thanks. I'm not hungry, I had a late lunch. I'll take the walk though."
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You didn't plan on being alone with Minho today, even though you knew you had to talk to him eventually. You just thought you had a little more time, at least until you got your shit together and face him with a brave façade.
Minho's hand brushes yours the entire time you walk, and it's nothing if not confusing. It's unbearable, the way your fingers twitch with the urge to intertwine them with his.
It persists even after Hyunjin has waved you goodbye to you two and turned to head wherever he and Felix agreed to meet. You think Minho would hold your hand now that it's just you and him, but he doesn't. He lets your skin continue to brush, lets you suffer alone and wanting in your sunken disappointment.
It has very little to do with him and everything to do with you, the conflicting thoughts inside your head piling up one by one the more time you spend in his presence.
Dove, the brief display of jealousy at Yeonjun's party, the way he looks at you sometimes that you can't really decipher the meaning behind, how he kisses you so tenderly that it can't possibly be strictly platonic. You want these things to all mean something, and yet...
You want him to hold your hand, but you know you'd wave it off if he tries to reach for your fingers. You want him to stop you right then and there to kiss you breathless, just as he had that night two weeks ago, even though you're sure you'd only dodge his lips and push him away. You want to stay, you want to leave. You're terrified of things changing, but you wish that something, anything, would be different for him; that you aren't the only one who's spinning out of control. You love him, but you wish you didn't.
Eventually, Minho asks, "You okay?"
It's not until now that you realize this is the first time you've ever been this quiet around him. You purse your lips, glancing down briefly at your feet as you keep on treading the rest of the way home. "Yeah, all good. I'm just tired," you tell him, visibly unenthusiastic despite the smile you try to fake. "I just need to sleep it off."
"The project stressing you out?"
"I guess, yeah."
"And here I thought maybe you were avoiding me," he says, half a joke, half inquisitive. "Were you?"
"Was I what?"
"Were you avoiding me?"
You give him a weird look, one that's meant to be dismissive and call his question ridiculous even though you know you've been caught. And maybe it's the over-the-top glance that you throw his way and the way your pitch goes higher when you reply, "Why would I be avoiding you?" that makes him stop walking.
On the other side of the street, there's a couple of kids in high school uniforms, exchanging shy glances and sharing fond giggles.
Minho calls your name softly, and it's like you're just waiting for the ball to drop. You don't want to turn back and look at him, but what other option do you have? What else is there to do?
You can't decipher the expression on his face. He's still calm, but the air has turned serious, the silence of the mostly empty streets surrounding you only serves as the soundtrack of your impending heartbreak. The tender and innocent laughter fades away when young love moves further and further from where you stand. "What?" you ask with faux nonchalance as you look at him, another attempt at stalling. Biding your time even though a few more minutes aren't going to do any good for your case.
Anyone with half a braincell could tell that clearly it's not the truth, let alone someone who has learned to read you better than the back of his hand. He doesn't look like he believes you, though he doesn't push it, much to your surprise.
"Okay," he says after a moment of studying you, and this should be the part where you heave a sigh of relief because he's letting you off the hook for now, but your chest doesn't feel lighter at all. Your head is clouded with dread, with the anticipation that you're only delaying the inevitable.
You walk the rest of the way in awful silence, because you know that he knows something is wrong. You try your best to appear composed, but he sees right through you. You know he does.
You must look like a frightened animal, one that's about to take off running any second now.
When you reach your building, Minho is quick to keep you with him before you can make up a lame excuse and bolt.
"Hey," he starts, his voice so impossibly gentle that it hurts. "You know you can tell me anything, right?"
Heavier and heavier, it weighs you down until you feel like your chest is going to collapse. The nerves gnaw on you, clawing into you until you feel your heartbeat quicken, the overwhelming dread simmering low in your belly.
"I know," you say, but deep down, what you're really thinking is, Not this. This is the one thing I can't tell you.
"Is everything okay?"
It's the way that Minho's got his gaze set on you with those deep brown irises, the concern so apparent in them that it hurts you. It's the way he looks like he wants to reach out and touch you - a comforting hand on your shoulder or your back like you're so familiar with - but he has to hold himself back or you might slip away.
It's him, how he always puts you first, how he cares about you in ways that you've never been cared about before. He understands you, he sees you. It feels like it could be love if you let the lines blur just enough.
Is love supposed to hurt? Like this?
Maybe it's not that you don't know how to hold love. Maybe it's because you're not meant to hold it at all. Insignificant, unlovable.
And... it's the reminder that cuts through the dread like the sharpest knife.
You leave his question unanswered, because nothing is okay and you can't tell him any of it. You can't lie to him either, because it's the last thing that you want to do to him.
Instead, you ask, "We're good... right? We're okay?"
"What do you mean?"
You gesture between the two of you, though you're not sure what that's supposed to signify. "Just...," you trail off for a second, hesitant. "Nothing's changed, right?"
Minho doesn't answer right away. He looks at you for a moment, searching for something in your eyes that you can't tell if he's able to find.
He nods, seemingly wistful as he says, "Nothing's changed."
He seems unsure about it, at least more than he was just a few weeks ago when he told you the same thing in your apartment with his fingers wrapped around your wrist. The tug between his brows - though barely noticeable - tells you as much.
Is it because something is different now? Or does he only sound uncertain out of concern, because of you and how you're acting?
Then he continues, "For me, at least."
And there it is.
It's the confirmation this time around that turns you inside out so his simple words could cut into you.
You swallow thickly, put on a smile like you're pleased with his answer even though you're trying your hardest to stop yourself from shaking. Whatever energy you had left is instantly drained from you just because of a few words.
Your sentences get smashed together, tangled up like barbed wire and they only make you bleed when you try to pull them apart. All your nervous tics coming out to play despite your best efforts to keep them at bay. A frustrated hand running through your hair, gripping at the roots a little harshly. Your bottom lip pulled between your teeth and your eyes turning glassy for a split second before you blink the moisture away, because you can't let Minho see you like this. See you trying to keep your pathetic heart intact while he's none the wiser.
He's fine. And unlike you, he's going to be okay when this is over.
Unavoidable and inevitable, the end will come whether you like it or not. You're the only one who won't make it out unscathed, and it will only shatter you into more pieces the longer you drag this out.
Just rip the bandaid off. Salvage whatever you can. Stop digging the grave even deeper for yourself.
One second, then two, then three. You don't speak until you have enough faith that your voice is even enough to carry out a few sentences.
"Okay, uhm... I think I need some time for myself. We should..." But it isn't, and you crack halfway through. The sound is deafening to your own ears. "We should take a break. We should stop this."
Minho doesn't question if you mean the secret between the two of you, or your friendship entirely. Instead, he asks, "Why?"
"I told you." You clear your throat. "I need time for myself."
You can't tell what he's thinking, but the knife twists inside of you nonetheless.
He takes a step closer, you take a step back.
You watch as his face falls, and the same feeling mirrors itself within the confines of your ribcage. Your heart drops at the sight of his eyes, deep brown irises stained with a little confusion, then a little hurt though it lasts for only a few seconds. The slight slump of his shoulders, the absence of the familiar playfulness he always sports when he's with you.
He blinks.
"Time for yourself, or time away from me?"
You say nothing.
You don't address his question directly, and your reluctance to do so is a loud enough answer in and of itself. "Why does that matter? What's the difference?"
"It matters if I did something to upset you."
"You didn't."
"Okay. So?"
This is confusing, because he's not letting you rip the bandaid clean off and you don't know why. "Nothing's changed, right? If it didn't mean anything to you, why can't you just drop this?"
Minho is quiet for a beat. His eyes are searching again, but this time, you think he finds something.
Everything is still and you hate it - the silence of the streets, the scrutinizing orange glow of the streetlights as if they're watching the scene unfold, even the innocent cat that's sitting by itself on the balcony on one of the floors higher up. You hate all of it.
"I never said it didn't mean anything," he tells you.
It makes you a little angry for some reason, and there's enough red to cloud your vision because his words are contradicting and you're tired, you're so exhausted that you can't focus on what it is that he's really saying.
"So you lied to me?"
"I've never lied to you."
"I asked you before and you said nothing's changed. Now you're saying whatever this is didn't not mean anything. Make up your mind."
It gets redder when he keeps his eyes fixed on you, still so calm despite the frown that has returned to its place between his brows. Still so collected, while you're being pulled apart at the seams.
The ball doesn't drop the way you expect it to. It keeps falling so insufferably slowly, hanging over you like it's mocking you for being stupid, like it's milking every second of suspense to make you implode.
Until Minho speaks next and suddenly, it feels like the air has been sucked out of your lungs. His voice, still so soft and tender. His eyes, reading something in yours that you can't bear to admit out loud.
"You really don't see it, do you?"
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all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 24.06.2024]
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h0ck3yl0v3r · 10 months
Text
foolish one
╰── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──╯
lh43 x childhood bestfriend!reader
warnings: angst, semi-swearing
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you and luke were inseparable. always attached to each other, whether it was you attending his hockey games or him attending your events. everyone around you guys always thought you were both dating, although you wish you were, there was never any romantic relationships.
highschool graduation happened, and you and luke both had committed to the university of michigan. as time went on through senior year, yours and lukes relationship was rocky, luke being too busy with hockey and girls to always be there for you. as for you, you were still one of his biggest supporters. it was in that long list of promises you guys made when you were seven. 'we promise to always be there for each other no matter what.'
college was rocky, you barely saw luke, heard from him, it was hard on you.
chances are, tonight, you've already got plans and chances are i will talk myself to sleep again
you cried every night, seeing pictures of luke at parties with girls while you were never invited. you felt invisible to him now, your mom and ellen called every day, they knew how much love you have for luke, they knew it from the moment you slipped and fell on the ice and luke helped you up, the moment your spark in your eyes grew.
and the voices say, "you are not the exception you will never learn your lesson"
that spark was now slowly fading away. you really thought you had a chance being his best friend that maybe, just maybe he'd be in love with you too.
don't know what to call this situation but i know i can't call you mine
the whole first semester of freshman year went by really fast, meaning it was now time for winter break, one of your favorite seasons. luke was still radio silence, you both always spent winter together, guess he's too famous for you now, another promise broken, 'we promise to never forget each other, no matter how famous we get.'
but goodbye screamin' in the silence and the voices in my head are tellin' me why
when ellen and your mother came down to visit they held a little gathering with jack, quinn, luke and his friends.
the gathering was a mess.
"yo moose who's this girl in your baby pictures." one of his teammates had brought up.
"oh her, she's just an old friend." he had replied, 'old friend.' that hurt to hear, you were no longer apart of his life.
cause you got her on your arm and me in the wings i'll get your longing glances, but she'll get your ring
luke didn't know you were there, too busy with his new girlfriend and teammates. but you heard it all, you see it all, it was heartbreaking, quinn saw it all though. quinn was always second closest to you, being that person you looked up to, he was the first person you ever confessed you had a crush to luke on.
"it hurts quinny, it hurts so much, i feel like a ghost to him. i thought we would've happened i thought all the signs i gave him would've been enough for him to catch on. i feel so stupid" you sobbed into quinns chest, hos heart breaking for you.
"shh its okay, my brothers an idiot, please don't feel like stupid, it's not your fault angel" quinn rubbed your back softly as you sat there and cried yourself to sleep.
foolish one sittin' 'round waiting for confessions of love they ain't never gonna come and thinkin' he's the one, you should've been walkin' out foolish one
you woke up the next morning devastated. maybe in another universe it could've happened, but right now its time to piece yourself back together. you couldn't face watching your spark keep fading over someone who no longer is present in your life.
when all is said and done, he just wasn't the one no, he just wasn't the one
for you, luke will always be your past present and future, but right now he is not what is needed in your life, mayne one day he'll come back to his senses but for the time being self-love is the best healing.
tags: @drysdalesv @ghostfacd @shy4turcs
pt 2??
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favefandomimagines · 3 months
Text
Love is a Battlefield (j.m)
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Request: Idk I don’t have like a request request but anything with jj maybank honestly okay or maybe the way 13 going on 30 randomly popped in my head like maybe Jenna and matty vibes @idontevenknowbsblog
Summary: JJ Maybank had been your best friend since you were 4 years old and then life started to complicate things.
AN: this is a long one lol and maybe not as close to Jenna and Matty but definitely a best friends to lovers, I got carried away lol not edited
Your mom would joke that it was fate for JJ Maybank to end up in your life. It was fate that her and JJ’s mom would be in the same lamaze class. Because of fate and that friendship, it formed the relationship you cherished the most. JJ was a constant. If there was one thing you could rely on, it was JJ always being there.
Even after his mom left, JJ was there. Moreso after Luke began the drinking and the drugs. It was often a point of contention between him and your mother. She felt she owed it to her long time friend to look after her son and Luke put JJ in danger every day.
Kindergarten started with you and JJ, and ended with you, JJ, John B and Pope. The four of you becoming an instant package deal.
The three of them were there when your dad passed away suddenly when you were 10. Though John B and Pope were supportive, JJ never left your house. Sleeping in a sleeping bag outside your bedroom door for weeks.
It was the four of you navigating your adolescence up until the age of 14. The Summer before sophomore year started with four and finished with five.
Kiara became a fast friend when her parents opened The Wreck and you needed a Summer job to keep you busy. The rest was history, Kie’s Kook year being nothing but a snide comment here and there.
JJ joked that you were the glue that held the Pogues together. If they didn’t have you they’d all fall apart. He loved you since you were 14, all throughout high school and he never said a thing. You staying in his life was more important than how you stayed in his life.
Now you were quickly approaching graduation. You hadn’t been too open about your post-grad plans and that worried him.
He was worried you were going to leave him and never come back. Was it overdramatic? Sure, but it was also realistic. You were always too good for him and maybe that’s why he never told you how he felt.
It was the night before the first day of senior year and the Pogues were sitting around the fire at the Chateau.
“What are everyone’s post-grad plans? We haven’t really talked about it.” John B spoke. “Way to kill the mood, dude.” JJ replied. “Come on, we have to talk about it. We can’t stay at the Chateau forever.” John B replied. “Well, I got into USC. Only a 6 hour drive from you guys.” Kie said.
“I’ll be going to community college on the mainland.” Pope replied. “Starting trade school next fall, open up my own garage here.” John B said. “Y/N, what about you?” Kie asked. “Oh, well, if you would’ve asked me two weeks ago I would’ve said nothing at all but, I do have some news.” You answered.
JJ furrowed his eyebrows at your words. News? What have you not told him? You tell him everything.
“I applied to UNC and I got in. Almost a full ride but I’ll work for the rest of my tuition.” You announced. The Pogues cheered and came to their feet to applaud you. You had always talked about attending UNC ever since you found out your dad had attended.
“That’s amazing, Y/N!” John B cheered. “And only 3 hours from you and J.” You commented. JJ being the only one to not congratulate you didn’t go unnoticed by you. While everyone was occupied, you nudged his foot with yours, signalling to go down to the dock.
You both got up from your spots and walked down to the water in silence. “I know what you’re thinking,” You started. “And what am I thinking?”JJ asked. “You think I’m leaving you. That I’m going to move on from you, find something better.” You continued.
JJ’s silence proved that your thoughts were right. “J, I’m not going anywhere yet. It’s only August, we have almost a year left.” You spoke. “Y/N, this is UNC. You’re going to school, get your fancy degree and move on from your entire life. Me included, you won’t want to hang out with some guy who’s doing nothing with his life.” JJ explained.
“You’re taking over the entire yacht club. That’s a big deal! You’re going to be getting a head start with your life while I’ll be in school for 8 years waiting to start mine.” You replied. “Besides, you think 3 hours is going to keep me away?” You added.
JJ shrugged, his gaze fixated on the water in front of him. “You’re my best friend, JJ. I would never leave you behind.” You added. “Do you promise?” He asked. “I promise.” You said, holding out your pinky in front of him.
“A pinky promise? Come on, Y/N, we’re 18.” JJ said. “And when have I ever broken a pinky promise?” You rebutted. JJ smirked slightly before hooking his pinky with your’s.
XX
It was October. The leaves began to change and the air was becoming brisk. Fall had descended upon the Outer Banks and Fall meant homecoming. You thought you had outgrown the excitement for homecoming but it was your last one. And you thought that maybe homecoming was the perfect time to tell JJ how you felt about him.
Somewhere between 15 and 16, the feelings of love you had for JJ had gone from platonic to the complete opposite. That was why you held off on telling JJ about UNC. Thinking that you two could live in your perfect teenage bubble for a little while longer.
You felt stupid for trying to pursue a relationship with JJ a few months before you left for college but your friendship has withstood the test of time, it could withstand 266 miles. Right? You owed it to yourself to try.
“So, are you going to ask JJ to homecoming?” Kie asked. “How did you know?” You asked your friend as the pair of you stood at her locker. “Because I know you, Y/N. You’ve had feelings for you for as long as I’ve known you. You look at him the same way you look at Paul Mescal.” She teased.
“Yeah, I think I’m going to ask him. I’m terrified he’s going to say no and then I ruined everything.” You said. “He’s not going to say no. And even if he does, you guys have been through too much to let something this small ruin your friendship.” Kie replied.
You wanted to believe her and that everything was going to be fine one way or another bit as you stood outside JJ’s house, pacing, you couldn’t help but think of the worst case scenario. Luke was MIA so you didn’t have to worry about him storming outside.
JJ walked by his front door and heard your voice mumbling outside. He looked out the window and saw you pacing on his lawn. “Y/N? What are you doing here?” JJ asked as he opened the screen door.
“J, hey, uh I just wanted to ask you something. Or tell you something.” You stammered. “You okay?” He questioned. “Yeah, yeah I’m good.” You said. “What’s up?” He asked.
“Okay, so um, would you want to go to homecoming with me? Either as friends or, uh, more than friends?” You said, avoiding his gaze at all possible. “What?” He questioned. “Do you want to go to homecoming with me? Not as friends but as a date?” You repeated.
JJ thought he was dreaming. Were you really telling him you wanted to go to homecoming as more than friends? But why now? You were leaving for Chapel Hill in the Fall, how is it fair to either of you to pursue your feelings when you’ll just be leaving?
“Y/N, you’re leaving in August. I don’t think you want to do this.” He said. Your face fell as you processed his words. “I’m sorry, what?” You asked. “You’re leaving. Even if I felt the same way, we couldn’t do long distance.” He lied.
JJ lied through his teeth. He had to because he knew you needed to go to UNC. It was your dream, it’s where you always wanted to go. He couldn’t stand in the way of that. It was going to be harder as friends, he couldn’t imagine what it’d be like as your boyfriend.
Though seeing the look on your face made him wish he could take those words back. “Uh, this was a mistake. I should go.” You said, backing away slowly from his front porch.
You were so embarrassed, how could you have misread everything that poorly. “Y/N, we-“ JJ started. “Don’t. Please don’t make me feel worse than I already do.” You interrupted, before turning around and walking home.
JJ could see not only the unshed tears in your eyes, but the hurt as well. He could’ve been honest, told you the truth. He didn’t know how you’d both do long distance once you were in college. He was scared to lose you but he did anyway by lying.
You got home and walked through the front door and saw your mom standing in the entryway. “How’d it go?” She asked. But she could tell by the look on your face that it did not go well.
All you did in response was finally break down in tears. Your mom gave you a solemn look before she walked over and wrapped you in an embrace. “Oh honey, I’m sorry.” She spoke. “I feel so stupid.” You cried. “You’re not stupid, Y/N, you just loved him.”
XX
It was now December. Homecoming came and went and you didn’t go. Two months had gone by and you hadn’t spoken to JJ. You were angry, embarrassed, confused. Why did you think JJ felt the same way? Why did you ruin your friendship like this?
JJ called you everyday, sent texts, but you didn’t want to see or hear what he had to say. You were angry with him for embarrassing you the way he did. And you were stupid enough to think he actually liked you. He was JJ Maybank for crying out loud, every girl in your grade wanted to be with JJ. What made you different?
That meant that your relationship with the Pogues was suffering. You didn’t want to make them choose sides so you made the decision for them and therefore stopped seeing them as often.
But it was now Winter Break and they were determined to figure out what exactly had gone wrong.
“So what’s going on with you and JJ? You haven’t spoke in months.” John B asked as you sat outside your house. “Nothing. What did he tell you?” You questioned.
“Nothing. Just like you. Seriously, Y/N, what happened?” John B questioned. You were quiet for a moment, fidgeting with your fingers.
“I told him how I felt. I told him that I wanted to go to homecoming with him as more than a friend and he rejected me. He doesn’t feel the same way.” You explained.
John B was silent. More so out of confusion than anything else. How could JJ say he didn’t feel the same way when he 100% did?
“Can we please not talk about it? I’m embarrassed enough as it is.” You added, standing up to walk back inside.
John B was going to figure this out one way or another.
He arrived at home and saw JJ’s bike out front. “J?” He called entering the home. “What’s up?” JJ asked, entering the living room. “What is going on with you and Y/N? And don’t lie and tell me nothing. She told me everything.” John B questioned.
JJ was quiet for a moment, knowing that he was going to have to face his mistake. “You have feelings for her, J. Why did you tell her you didn’t?” John B added.
“Because she’s leaving. She’s going to UNC, going to make all of her dreams come true and I can’t be holding her back. What happens if we got together? One, she stays here for me and then down the line resents the fact she stayed instead of following her dreams. Two, I get my heart broken because I fall even more in love with her and she leaves. It doesn’t end well for either of us either way.” JJ answered.
“JJ, you can’t live your life like that. Have you ever thought about going with her? They have jobs in Chapel Hill.” John B suggested. “And be her loser boyfriend who followed her from home?” JJ scoffed. “Now you’re just being a jerk. And being way too hard on yourself.” His friend said.
“It’s the truth, John B.” JJ replied. “No it’s not. You just won’t let yourself be happy.” John B told him.
JJ was quiet as John B walked off to his room. Maybe he had a point. He was finding excuse after excuse to not let himself be happy. But his entire life was based on waiting for the other shoe to drop.
You were the most important person to him and he couldn’t lose you like he’s lost everyone else. What was he supposed to do? The damage was done, you weren’t talking to him. There was no way he could make things right.
His body moved before his brain could catch up, and he was getting on his bike making a run for your house. John B was right. He shouldn’t be letting these things get in the way of something that would make him happy.
When he arrived, he barely turned the bike off before he was already off. He just stood there for a moment, thinking about what he was going to do next. He didn’t really leave with a plan.
JJ looked down at the flower bed and saw small pebbles and his brain kicked into over drive.
He tossed the first pebble at your window, the sound slightly echoing off the glass. After a few seconds, he tossed another one.
You were sitting on your bed reading a book when you heard taps on your window. You furrowed your eyebrows as you discarded the book and walked to the window.
The sight shocked you. JJ was standing outside tossing rocks at your window. You slid your window opened and looked out. “JJ, what are you doing here?” You asked.
“You weren’t answering my calls or texts.” He says. “I know. That was on purpose.” You sassed back. “I want to say…I lied to you,” He started.
“I lied to you the night you asked me to homecoming. I do feel the same way. I have since we were 14 and you punched Rafe Cameron in the nose for making fun of my backpack. You’re my best friend. You’re perfect and I just got scared. Scared that no matter what, we were just going to be another high school couple and never speak again once you leave. I love you, Y/N and I was stupid to make you think that I don’t.” JJ finished.
“Give me a sec.” You said before closing the window. JJ’s heart sank. Were you going to reject him? He felt like he was going to throw up from anxiety.
JJ heard the front door open and moved to stand in front of your porch. You walked out in your seashell pajamas that you bought with Sarah last year.
"Do you mean all of that?" You asked. "You're not just going to bail when it gets hard?" You added. "No, no I'm not going to bail. You're worth it, Y/N. Like you said you'll only be a few hours away. I could be in Chapel Hill by noon on a Wednesday if you said the word." JJ said.
"Then I guess I need to get a UNC Boyfriend t-shirt. If that's what you want." You said. "I'll wear that t-shirt every single day." JJ said, walking towards you kissing you deeply.
You had imagined your first kiss with JJ many times and the real thing was so much better than you had thought.
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joelmillers-whore · 1 year
Text
Hard Light | Chapter 1
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summary: when a new english professor begins teaching your class for the duration of your semester, you can’t help but develop an innocent crush on him. he’s as off-limits as he can be, but that doesn’t deter you in the slightest. after a drunk night, you accidentally email him something that wasn’t intended to ever be seen by anyone. but that doesn’t matter. it triggers a misunderstanding that manifests into an affair with your professor who is twenty years your senior. nothing good could come of this, right? 
pairings: professor!joel x college student!reader
word count: 2.2K
series or one-shot
warnings: 18+ explicit, minors DNI, no mention of Y/N, alternate universe, professor/student relationship, eventual smut, self-esteem issues, workaholic, joel x female!reader, infatuation bordering on obsession (stay delulu friends), some sexual thoughts, masturbation (f), joel being a huge tease lol, (will add more tags as i write)
AN: i am so excited by the response that my joel one-shot got a few days ago and i’ve been itching to get something else out to you all. big, giant forehead kisses for those who want one, i love you all. so, anyway, a mini-series about professor joel is coming at you fast. i’ve written the first few chapters, so expect those in the near future. i’m thinking once a week? this fic is going to be something else and i’m so excited to share it with ya’ll. enjoy, and let me know what you think. find my ao3 here for more content and other fandoms.
You were running late for your shift at the coffee shop on campus, rummaging around your dresser, trying to find the low-cut black top you always wore when you had a shift. You weren’t usually one to feed into the peer pressure of those around you, but push came to shove when you found it nearly impossible to keep yourself afloat as a twenty-something student without the added extra tips from your part-time job.
So what if you had to show a little bit of cleavage? Right? There was no harm. Student loans were a bitch and on top of rent and food costs, you had to get a job at the coffee shop and balance a full course load just to make ends meet. 
A thought popped into your head and you rushed to your laptop, throwing it open as you checked the time; 5:45 AM. If you busted out your lightning-fast typing skills, you would have enough time to catch the next bus and make it to campus with five minutes to spare. If only your crappy second-hand computer would work.
The thing honestly sounded like a chopper engine, getting ready for lift-off. You were surprised you’d gotten this far with it. Not that you weren’t appreciative, your older brother had passed it down and it had relieved a huge weight—  and expense off of your shoulders. 
You tabbed into your school portal, typing in your credentials and selecting your English course. You sighed heavily, as you skimmed over the assignment for this week, something to do with a sonnet that you couldn’t care less about. You loved school but ever since becoming an English major, the spark that you once had for literature sort of just evaporated.
You couldn’t tell if it was because of how busy you were with everything else that you just couldn’t find the time to enjoy it, or the thought that really scared you, you had fallen out of love with it. 
It had been two years of go, go, go and you were, for lack of a better word, burnt out. You’d tried dropping courses last semester, thinking that you just needed a little bit of ease when it came to your course load, but when that didn’t solve the problem and only made things worse for you, you spent the last two semesters trying to catch up and get yourself to a place where you could finally breathe.
But it wasn’t easy. You were only now caught up to where you had been, the illusion that you were someone who could afford to take time off and slow down was a distant memory. 
In bold letters, the words Paid Internship jumped off of the screen. You smiled as you leaned in closer to the screen, making sure you read through everything correctly. This was the break above the surface that you needed, the reprieve that you had been chasing. A paid internship was exactly how you’d be able to make more money and maybe have a little breathing room before you worked yourself into an early grave.
You clicked the mail icon at the top and clicked into a new email, deciding that the worst-case scenario was that you wouldn’t get the internship. All you were doing was inquiring about the application process. Best-case scenario; you’d get it and make some extra pocket money. 
You saw the time, cursing under your breath as you slammed the laptop closed, grabbed your phone out of the charger and ran out of the door. You couldn’t be late, not again. You texted your co-worker Jeremy to open the shop without you and explained to him that you were running a few minutes late, as you barely made it to the bus. You climbed on board, scanned your student pass and found a seat near the back. Your chest was burning from the rush of trying to make it on time, but you could breathe easy now.
You checked your messages mindlessly, scrolling through a bunch of unread ones that you didn’t have the heart to answer. 
Before you knew it, the familiar monuments and buildings of UT Austin came into view, and the subtle change of scenery from downtown to a more densely packed area made your heart skip a beat. It was the same each time you were back on campus. Which, these days, was often. Sliding out of the seat, you made your way to the front, thanking the driver as the bus came to a complete stop. 
The coffee shop was only a short walk from the bus stop but even still you quickened your pace. You didn't want to leave Jeremy alone for long, you already felt bad enough about letting him open by himself. You stifled a yawn as you pushed open the door to the small cafe, leaning your body into the door, slightly cringing at the shrill sound of the bell. 
"There you are", a male voice called, making your head snap up. You wiggled your nose, the familiar timbre of your ex-boyfriend's voice ringing in your ears. "It's about time you got your ass down here". 
You snickered, shrugging your heavy bag off of your shoulder, and dropping it behind the counter, turning around and greeting him with an unamused smirk.
Jeremy and you had gone out for a few months last year, it was your first and, as of right now, the only short-term relationship that you'd had in college. 
Dating your co-worker, even in a relatively small place like the coffee shop on campus, almost always spelled trouble, but Jeremy was not the type to hold something like a failed relationship over your head. He understood that school was a priority for you and making a living for yourself came first, even above something like a relationship. It might not be the healthiest way to live, but it was how it always was. 
Jeremy and you had developed a fast friendship, one that went beyond the romantic relationship that you'd had last year. You parted amicably and now, you had someone you could confide in, someone you could trust. 
"Why don't you say that to my face?", you teased, raising a brow at him over the milk frother you were setting up. 
Jeremy threw his rag down and stalked over to you. "You're snippy this morning", he chided. 
You banged into his shoulder playfully, "Doesn't help that I have to see your ugly mug first thing in the morning". 
You snorted out a laugh and Jeremy looked at you, feigning defensiveness, "Ouch", he paused, returning back to his post near the coffee machine, "Remind me how we ever went out?". 
You scrunched your nose and threw your rag at Jeremy, hitting him square in the face with it, "That was rude". 
He shrugged his shoulder, "You started it".  
You both devolved into a fit of giggles and fell into a comfortable silence, setting up and getting the coffee shop ready for the day. You had a half-day shift to look forward to and then you had class until the late afternoon. The days were long and the nights were longer.
You usually found yourself nose-deep in your textbooks, more often than not, or some classic novel that was required for class, not moving from the couch until your eyes were red and you were seeing double. 
Only then did you retire to sleep, crashing hard until you had to wake up and do it all again the next day. 
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
The coffee shop had been bustling with people since six in the morning, and at one in the afternoon, it hadn't let up, only now you had to go to class. Waving Jeremy goodbye, you sidestepped Tara, the fourth-year who was covering the rest of the afternoon and closing shift. 
You'd crossed the far side of campus, passing by the science building and one of the massive libraries that had acted like a second home to you back when you’d been studying for exams when you were a freshman. You could thank your obnoxious roommates for that one. 
Entering the lecture hall, bodies pressed into you as you weaved through the growing crowd, trying to find a spot in the middle where you could see and hear your English professor. But also blend in with the masses. As if the universe had other plans in mind, and everyone suddenly showed up to the Tuesday lecture all at the same time, you found yourself picking a seat near the front, an exasperated groan leaving you. 
You hated sitting at the front, not because you didn't want to get called on to answer something or because you didn't know the answers, but because you did. You wanted to get through your four years as quickly and unscathed as possible and if people knew, mainly professors, that you knew more about the subject matter than you needed to, you'd surely get called on more often, making you stick out in ways you didn't want. 
It was a terrible curse, going through life with the self-esteem that you did. But it was how you were raised. Blend in. Don't be too loud. Be quiet and only observe. Nerves rapped at your insides when you thought about getting called on when class started. Your heart rate ticked up and you found that your hands were beginning to get clammy, your throat constricting with each breath.
You rubbed your hands up and down your thighs, grounding yourself with the sensation of the material. 
With a jump, you sat up straighter in your seat, being jostled from your thoughts by a loud slam. You snapped your head toward the entrance, eying the person who had startled everyone. It was a man carrying a briefcase.
Your lips tilted up at the edges, amusement tickling you when you thought of anyone using a briefcase nowadays. But here this man was, head down as he made his way to the front of the room, toward the desk. 
You couldn't help keeping your eyes trained on him. On how his slacks tightened around his butt, moulding to the shape and curve of it. You bit your bottom lip out of reflex, your eyes dragging down the length of the mystery man who had crashed your lecture. Maybe he was a TA? Your brows furrowed when you thought about how your professor was nowhere in sight. 
The man with the briefcase placed his case on the desk, turning to face the audience of students who blinked back at him, who now settled down enough to hear him speak. Air caught in your throat when his eyes flicked momentarily to you, and lingered on you for half a second longer than you'd expected. He had massive, warm brown eyes, and soft wrinkles that danced at the edges of his eyes when he smiled, making him seem more boyish than he appeared.
He looked older than a TA would but then again, who were you to judge someone's position in life? You thought that his age did nothing to undermine just how attractive he was, if anything it added to it.  
The man, who may or may not have been moonlighting as your English TA cleared his throat, nodding his head, "My name is Joel, well, Professor Miller to most, but 've always been a little bit more informal than my peers". 
He began to circle the wooden desk nervously, his large hand finding the edge of it and stroking it far more sensually than necessary. You flexed your fingers, gripping the arm of your seat to stabilize yourself. "So, you can call me Joel from here on out... since we'll be seeing more of each other from now on". 
Murmurs began to break out around the lecture hall, and confused and hushed whispers followed. 
Professor Miller— Joel, mumbled something incoherent, and you were unable to hear it from where you sat. He cleared his throat again, "Professor McCarthy has taken a leave of absence, so I'll be filling in for him for the remainder of the semester". 
You crossed your legs, feeling heat rise and a furious blush break out across your face, and shuffled in your seat, a loud creak emitted from it and you stilled, praying that the loud sound had only been heard by you and no one else. But when you lifted your gaze, Joel's eyes were already locked on you, blown and brimming with cautious inquiry. A touch of a smirk graced his lips. 
"And I look forward to getting to know each and every one of you, personally". His eyes were still on you, not ready to release you from their hold. 
His tongue darted out to wet his lips and you couldn't help but stare. You had every reason to look away from him, he was your professor and given the clear age difference, he was someone who was off limits. But when he didn't look away from you either, trapping you with his gaze, your face heated up, suddenly aware that he was purposely staring at you. 
You swallowed thickly, heart hammering as Joel's eyes finally drifted away from you and back to the faces of your classmates. He continued on with addressing the class, and you noticed that he avoided your eyes for the rest of the lecture. 
Only one thought rang through your mind as you tried and failed to focus back on the lecture. This was going to be one long semester. 
487 notes · View notes
sakuraryomen01 · 10 months
Text
Valentino /Sukuna Ryomen x Reader/ .10
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warnings: asshole sukuna, college prep. school (aka bitch u at an expensive ass school), former friends to lovers, slow burned love, yuji is sukuna's little brother, smut/nsfw, hook ups, sexual fantasies and masturbation
reader: female reader; 23 years of age, college prep.
plot: It's been years since you've moved from country life, since you've forgotten about all the things you used to love about your hometown and where you grew up from... you didn't think it'd chase you to college in the city after almost a decade..
words: 1.761k
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fanfic masterlist: .o1 .o2 .o3 .o4 .o5 .o6 .o7 .o8 .o9 .10 .11 .12 .13 .14 .15 .16 .17 .18 .19 .20
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a/n:: before u guys read i hope that y'all r doing well and that the beginning of this chapter isn't as traumatic as it seems (to me anyways lmao XD). my life is crazy, but i wanted to get this next chapter out asap!! i love u guys!!
. . .
Thank you for reading this! Enjoy!
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. . .
“A-Ahh, fuck.. Shit~“
Dirty and whiny moaning, harsh slaps of skin on skin. The bed rocking hard, creating dents into the headboard, knocking against the wall. Nails dug into the skin of Sukuna’s biceps, his groaning and panting masked by the girl beneath him. Her cries louder than his ever were, the lewd mewls elicited from her throat as he continued to ram his cock deep into her cunny.
“Dammit, haa..” Sukuna’s brows pressed tighter together, his eyes glazing over as his edge neared. “Fuckk..”
The lady blushed, her gazed foggy but her cheeks flushed as she reached up to grab a hold of Sukuna’s face. Her fingers grazed the edges of his jawline as she squeezed harshly around his aching cock. He was so close.
“S-Sukuna.. I’m gonna cum again,” Her sultry voice echoed through his foggy head. The distraction he wanted to keep creating for himself wasn’t helping. Nothing was helping.
At this point, Sukuna didn’t know what to do anymore.
“Raise your damn ass, woman,” He said, his rough voice making the girl’s blush go from a slight heat to an almost feverish touch. Sukuna slipped himself from her heat– lifting her hips and flipped her onto her stomach– before slipping himself back into her warmth, beginning to feel his edge nearing, truly. “Fuck, ‘m close, girl.”
While Sukuna’s soft groans start to grow louder, even if only slightly, while the woman’s wails beneath him began to break. Her cries of pleasure and almost pain echoed with the bed’s creaking, only to be covered by the boom box downstairs and thirty other seniors and junior college students. The loud music, the booze, it was all a dangerous combo Sukuna had taken a liking to since attending this college. 
Since seeing you, and the moment he was forced to have you as a tutor.
He wasn’t so used to the common hustle and bustle, but seeing you among it. Seeing how well you were already molded into the society of the city, it disturbed him deeply. He didn’t understand, nor did he want to know why. All he knew was that it upset him, and he wanted to beat you at whatever this sad game was. This heart-to-heart shit wasn’t in the cards, neither was that “promise” he made. 
Sukuna was foolish when he was young, he didn’t want a broken heart. 
He didn’t have a broken heart.
“Call me sometime, hunny?” The drunk girl he had just destroyed giggled, slipping her pink and lacy thong over her plush thighs, a droopy smile on her face. “This was really, really fun.”
Sukuna, who was busy with his thoughts and belt, didn’t take a second glance. He just fixed his leather jacket up and grabbed his shoes, unlocking the door and leaving the room. “Not interested.”
While the woman was left frazzled and somewhat hurt, Sukuna fixed up his shirt and slipped on his shoes, glancing around the hallways before heading to the main living area. Grabbing another drink from the table, he chugged it down quickly despite the numb stink he got from the weird mixes. He crushed the plastic cup and turned away from all the grinding women and men that were swaying to the music that was playing outside, heading to the door as his mind began to fog up.
It was like an addiction, to remove all worry and annoyance from his mind.
Taking a second look around the party room, he pulled a small box from his back pocket and headed outside. Getting a lighter from his other pocket, he opened the small box, and lifted a cig from it. Bringing the stick to his lips, Sukuna lights the end of it as he climbs into his truck and starts the engine. While he said very few words on the way back to his dorm, he was lost in thought.
Thinking about the last month, seeing you near daily.
Seeing that skittish smile, and your nervous glances towards him. Even just recently, seeing you straight from the shower, it brought a small warmth to his cheeks. Although he’s seen tits before, it was shameful that he was wondering often what was hidden under that damned towel. What was covered that he didn’t want to think about after so long.
He had thought at first that you were truly the most annoying thing on the face of the planet, but a very small and dark part of him thought you had grown well. That your looks were down right gorgeous and adorable at the same time.
You looked so soft, but toned. Eyes pretty but they didn’t sparkle as bright as any attention whore he crossed paths with. You were perfectly imperfect to him.
Poetic.. Gross.
Once parked and out of the car, Sukuna walked from the parking lot to the male’s dormitory. His eyes found themselves looking towards the girl’s area, tracing each darkened or lit window they came across. Unable to spot which one probably belonged to you, he took a breath of the cold night air and a puff from his cancer stick. Wondering if your dorm was still as messy as it seemed last time. If it still smelled like cum and perfume. If your gaming system was all sorted like you used to keep your books in the Stix. 
The very thought of back then made him shiver and stiffen, pulling the now burned out end of the cigarette from his pinkish lips and pressing the lit end to a brick wall.
Tossing the bit over to the sidewalk, he stepped up to the building and headed to his dorn. Stepping passed the socks on knobs, the laughs of friends playing games in their rooms, the quiet murmurs and somewhat opened doors of people studying for their semi-finals and upcoming midterms. Sukuna passed them all to the third floor where his door sat at the very end of a quiet hallway, the silence almost too loud as he unlocked the door and pushed it open. 
Taking one step inside and feeling a sense of slight dread. A sense that something inside him wanted to stir.
Whatever it was, he was going to have to do it by hand.
Closing the door, he went to shower before going to make a breakfast burrito that he had saved from that morning. There wasn’t much on TV other than some news that didn’t interest him, so he got finished with his dinner and ended up watching some of the cartoons that he, you, and Gojo had watched prior. 
It didn’t matter if it made him kinda smile at the thought of you sitting on the floor with a blanket wrapped around your waist and thighs. It didn’t upset him to think about how cute you had grown up to be, that your features weren’t as bad as he wished they could. It was hard that he had to ignore this shitty clench of his chest and the throb in his pants.
Not a day in his life did Sukuna ever feel anything but rage or anger, but today, it was a feeling he despised. That he never wanted to feel again since his childhood, it was a stupid feeling he had squashed the second he left the Stix.
“..Fuck me,” He muttered to himself, letting his head rest back on the head of the couch. Pulling a blanket over his lap as Sukuna’s hand found its way underneath the cloth and rubbed at his crotch.
With very little effort, he could tell that he was rock hard. And even littler effort to free himself and start pumping his shaft, feeling all the pre that had collected in his pants. Sukuna lets out a groan, pressing his brows together as his mind wanders back to when he had walked in on you.
In my own room, you weirdo. At least you could’ve hung up a sock or some shit.
The cartoons continued to play, although the childish music and jokes on the screen didn’t make it to Sukuna’s ears. All he could think about was his new release, and about that damned towel. Wondering what would’ve happened if he had just snatched that rag and saw what was underneath for himself. Sukuna’s eyes lidded and his breath became ragged, thinking about what your tits felt like against his chest, wanting to grind his girth between them.
“Shit.. fuckk..”
The image of your small hips in his hands, letting him glide them over the fat or your ass until you yelped. Sukuna had wondered plenty about what your lips felt like against his, if you were a good or bad kisser. Whatever you were, he was willing to teach you. 
Returning the favor right?
Imagining the feeling of your lips between his teeth as he tugged and nibbled, wanting to watch them slightly swell from the kisses and breathless moans.
Sukuna felt his tummy and thighs clench, wanting to savor his orgasm. His hand went faster, the sounds of his fist pumping and shaking as pre slipped through his fingers became louder. Completely drowning out the sounds of the TV, Sukuna’s face scrunched up and he grabbed at the blanket.
His imagination brought him to his bed, your body under his. Your face flushed red, hands against his chest as if to attempt to push him away.
“Ryo.. It's embarrassing!”
Sukuna smirked as his fist squeezed his shaft, groaning under the intense pleasure. Wondering what your whimpers and moans sounded like, if your pussy was tight enough to make him finish early.
The thought of what lay between your thighs sent a jolt up Sukuna's spine, a sudden urge to cum overcame him.
He pulled the blanket from over his cock and glanced down at his naughty member. Seeing it become an angry looking red, it made him upset. How could you of all people make him so hard?
Why was it you? Your soft looking lips, your huggable waist and chest? Why of everyone he's fucked, everyone he's come across it was you that toppled over all?
Whatever his mind wanted, he wished he didn't.
As he released all over his pants, even kicking at his coffee table from the powerful climax, Sukuna's heart wasn't fulfilled.
He could feel a ping of guilt in his chest.
He really, really shouldn't have done that.
Worst part about it all was that he was going to be seeing you in class again, after the third time he played with his cock to thoughts of you.
“..Really.. Fuck my life.”
. . .
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a/n: finally got the chapter out guys!! I'll be quick on here since there's little to say but I hope y'all r doing good!!><
Chapter Song Theme:
— Varsity Fanclub - Zero [Lyrics] | 7Vibes Lyrics
taglist: @mageyboo, @mzladyd , @mysticwonderlandangel, @sukunaspersonalflashlight, @kawaiipenguin20, @k-indie, @okkotsufav, @cafeinthemoon93, @pulchritxde, @bontenbunny, @deepinballs, @kleeboomed, @fiierytearzx, @wo-ming-bai, @instantgalaxysheep, @watyousayin, @z3r0art, @sukunaobsessed, @lik0, @sukunasfirstlove, @princesstiti14, @nemoyr, @ladywolf44005, @cat-mak20, @coffee-on-a-rainyautumn, @hxlalokidottir, @domainofmarie, @the-moongoddess, @dark-n-dirty-duchess, @agentdedf1sh, @sukunastoy, @lyn-soso, @bao-yu-sarah-morningstar-wang-9, @heyitstacy, @lost-in-tokyo, @marksassybanana, @bozos-r-us , @p-3-4-c-h, @chaoticqueen33, @dxxny-loves-u, @l0tus-in-l0ve , @jiordeci, @opossum0-0, @gumisgirl, @mommasbigd, @heyitstacy
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kfedup · 5 months
Text
Regretsy no more
Hey, y'all. It's the lurker here.
I've been in the funkiest of funkless funks for the past few months and over the past few weeks, I've been unpacking why. Seeing how much I'm isolating because of a constellation of health-related issues and generalized depression. Have been considering trying meds. But one thing keeps coming to the surface and I finally decided it's time to deal with it.
The one thing is the only thing in my life that I regret. That thing is never having finished my bachelor's degree.
I'm twice divorced, have lost several important friendships, and moved more times than I can count to places I didn't really want to live to maintain relationships I should have never entered in the first place, but I wouldn't trade any of those things. I don't feel regret about them. Why would I? I discovered who I am and who I am not because I experienced those things. Each of them allowed me to learn how to repair what's possible and how to let go of that which is complete.
I'm very good at this marketing copywriting work but I'm bored senseless. I want to challenge myself and taking online workshops is fine but it's just more interacting through a screen and lord love a duck, my spirit needs more. Plus, I am not using my gifts of communication, empathy, mirroring, and holding space for others in the way I know I am meant to use them. For two years I've felt like I'm wasting what's left of my life.
I am so afraid I will die full of this regret.
The cost has kept me from pulling the trigger on this dream for several years. I wish I started sooner, but clearly, I wasn't miserable enough yet. I'm well and truly stuck in the muck at the bottom of the lake about it now. There's nothing left to do but swim to the surface, so here I go.
Today I applied as a transfer student to the Psychology program at Kent State University to start classes this summer. It will probably take me 3 years to finish the 2 years I have left because I'm a single-income household and will have to work. I'm terrified I won't be able to manage both, but I hope I can rally.
I'm not sure if I'll continue on to get the Psych MA at KSU or go elsewhere to get an MA in Art Therapy after I finish the BA. I also want to get certified in Internal Family Systems therapy, so I'll be 63ish or older starting a new career as a therapist and I feel excited about my future for the first time in... well... I don't even know. A very long time.
I want a career that feels meaningful to me, helps people instead of businesses, and lets me use my gifts. One I can do until I'm dead because I'mma need to work until they're spreading my ashes.
I plan to take a class this summer to dip my toes in.
Holy shit, y'all. Lila will be a senior and I will be a junior on the same campus. She's so supportive and I've been crying happy-scared-overwhelmed-curious-excited tears all day.
Kelly's going back to college. Holy shit.
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rosiestalez · 1 month
Text
Caught
Content 18+, minors will be banned
Warnings: Smut, degradation, unprotected sex, maybe an age gap, 26 year old Nightwing and 20 year old main character. Edging slightly, bad grammar and punctuation.
Summary: Dick is back in town paying a visit before school starts. He spots something interesting on your phone from the beloved blog app we have.
It has been a long week, all you wanted to do was sleep for an undetermined amount of time. Unfortunately, due to your college courses starting soon, you only had one day to prepare. You spent your summer working, crying, and drinking; something that a lot of college students do.
The sun creeps through the trippy tapestry that covers your window. Your eyes flutter open as the soft glow of 7am softly burns the sleep out of your eyes. You lay there silently for a second before Turing off your pink noise in spotify, the first 20-30 minutes of your morning is spent on Reddit; you went on a social media cleanse and only kept Reddit for “news”, but you mostly use it to keep up with r/Gothamcitybatmansightings.
You muster up the courage to get out of the plush bed your feet land on the soft carpet and you let out the biggest stretch you’ve been holding in all night. “Right well time to begin my last day of summer break”, you sigh to yourself. With that you waltz to your bathroom and begin your “day before school regimen” that you’ve had since your senior year of high-school when you met your first bottle of self tanner.
After your shower you make some coffee while letting your tanner dry. Your phone rings, you lift it to see the screen, ‘Babybat 🦇💙”.
“Hey! Good morning Richard !”,you cheer. You hate the name Dick so you decided to call him his legal name, except during sex when you let your pathetic moans do all the talking for you.
“Good morning beautiful, it’s good to hear your voice, although Richard just doesn’t flow off your tongue beautifully.” He chuckles over the phone. You simply roll your eyes, and pour your French vanilla creamer into your coffee. “Wayne and I just got back from Metropolis, so I’m bored. I know you’re busy getting your school things in order. I was wondering if you wanted to spend some time together?” He asks, you take a sip of your fresh coffee. You smile, at the thought of hanging out with him because you know what this entails; really good sex, endless pampering, and food.
“Yeah totally! I just have to put some clothes on so give me a call when you are close.” You say with excitement lining your voice.
“No clothes?” He smirks through the phone. “Stay that way I’ll be there soon, I want you on your bed waiting for me like a good girl.” You gasp, but this isn’t surprising. Your heart beat flutters down to your pussy. “Bye princess.”The line goes dead.
You down the rest of your coffee, and walk off back to your room, you slip off your robe and lay down on your bed, you have exactly 5 minutes to get into the mood to take Grayson’s cock. You scroll on tumblr reading fics about him, it’s insane how everyone is so accurate about his size, stamina, and sex positions. Your legs squeeze together in anticipation for him wet seeping from your hole, resisting the urge to touch your pussy.
Scratch that you have two minutes before he’s walking into your house. There he is in the doorway, his tall frame. He licks his lips with anticipation seeing you there vulnerable in-front of him. “God you’re such a good fucking girl.” He strips his uniform as he makes his way to your bed. “That’s what I like about you, you listen to everything I say. You do everything I ask because you’re a slut. Aren’t you?” His voice gets dark, only something you hear after a stressful mission, or when the bat family is getting to him. He comes to you for comfort and peace so it makes you wonder what happened on this trip, you see scratches on his chest that you aim to nurse back to health after he rearranges your delicate body.
“Yes sir.” Your voice shaky. He crawls on top of you, hovering your small frame. He leans in for a kiss, his kiss is deep and soft. Something you missed while he was gone, his tongue slips into your mouth fighting yours. He smiles into the kiss due to his win and pulls away. He notices your phone, open to the smutty fic you were reading before he walked in. His dick twitches against your bare thigh, the only barrier being his soft briefs.
“What is this?” His eyebrow cocks. He snatches the phone out your hand. “Dick slams into my hole, his thick cock stretching me. He tightens the leash around my neck with each stroke.” He reads aloud, your face burns, you could die right here just out of embarrassment. “Wow, you read about me?” He questions, “you read nasty things about me while I’m gone?” He follows. You just nod, no words can escape your mouth at the moment. “Well I didn’t know you liked to be collared.” He adds.
“I’m sorry, I missed you so much. You were gone for too long, and I needed you.” You explained softly. All he does is chuckle. He gets off of the bed and walks over to “the drawer”. He grabs a toy and a pair of cuffs.
“I don’t have anything to collar you with, but I will choke you until you’re dazed.” You squirm waiting for his cock to fill you.
“I’ll take that as a yes, I love when you’re a needy bitch for me. It turns me on so much.” *click* one side of the handcuff around your wrist, *click* one around your other. You can’t move your arms, they’re chained to your iron bed frame. Your breath is uneven, the flutter in your wet pussy getting faster. “Look at you, so pathetic.” He takes out his phone and flashes a picture of you. “I’m gonna use this later.” His dark smirk turned into a tooth filled grinned. *Buzzz* the toy turns on, “I’m gonna make you cum so hard you won’t need to read those.” He dances the toy along your thighs, up your body to your exposed breasts, circling it on your soft nipples, smiling as they begin to erect at the vibration. “Tell me what you want?” He whispers in your ear before kissing your pulse point. You push his hands down to your dripping center. “No darling, you have to use your words. Remember?” His arm resisting your pushes.
“I want it, I want you.” You moan.
“Where, be specific baby girl?” He looks at your cock drunk eyes.
“I want it on my puss-FUCK!” He places the vibrator on your sensitive clit before you could finish your sentence. Causing a pulse of pleasure and shock.
“Sorry did I scare you?” He asks sarcastically. “I knew you wanted it, I just wanted to have some fun.” He chuckles, but to your dissatisfaction he removes the toy from your clit. You let out a whine, “why the fuck are whining? You’re going to get what you need.” Darkness filling with voice again. “God why are you so pathetic!”
“I’m sorry Grayson.” You slightly tug at the cuffs, lift your hips up against his thigh to get some relief from the tension in your cunt. He pushes your hips down with force glaring at you; you’ve done it now you’re going to get what you want, but on his terms.
“Oh you shouldn’t have done that.” He says exactly what you’re thinking. He pulls down his briefs, his thick cock slapping against his stomach. “Look at what you do to me.” Your pussy drips and mouth waters when he point to his delicious cock. “I’m gonna use you today.” He leans over your cunt, spitting into your dripping hole. “Every- FUUUCCK- inch of you”, he shutters as he slides in. The first entrance is always the best. Your back arches at the feeling of being filled, and a small moan escapes your lips, “Shut up”, he slides out completely, and slams back in to the hilt of his cock. There’s pain and pleasure and a whine forces its way from your mouth again.
“That’s my girl, taking it all. I know you can do it.” He coos, his hand finds his way to your neck while the other supports his. “Take it all baby.” He picks up the toy, his grip tightens, he rises up placing you legs on his shoulders for stability as he places the toy on your even mores swollen clit. Your eyes begin to roll back as the feeling of being filled and stimulated. “S’beautiful”, he grunts. His pace gets quicker his hips snapping against you and his grip tightening around your neck. You can’t moan, can’t think, can’t speak. He pound into you, groaning and speaking nasty things, the toy rubs against you. You feel something boiling in your core, and pulsing in your pussy.
“I’m-“, you gasp for air, his grip unrelenting, “I’m gonna cum Rich!” His movement stops, he leaves your center and pulls the toy away from you. You look up at him with confusing.
“No you’re not, not yet.” He chuckles, he moves to hover over your face. “Taste yourself, open up.” He taps your cheek, you do as your told opening your mouth and sticking out your tongue as welcome to his cock. You gag as he reaches the back of your throat. You bob your head, his hand tangles into your hair, but is quickly removed when he feels the tracks of your expression, “s-sorry baby.” You try to smile, but it’s hard when there’s 6.5 inches in your mouth right now. He matches your pace, but his pace quickens and tears brim your eyes. “That’s my good gi-“ he shutters and a deep growl like moan escapes his lips. His cum fills your mouth. He pants, “I wanna see, open your mouth.” He pulls his cock out from your mouth, you stick your tongue out showing his excitement. “Good girl now swallow, look at me while you do it, nasty bitch.” You do as you’re told looking up in his eyes as you choke down his fluid. He really needs to drink more water. “You’re beautiful, so desperate to reach your end”, he cups your face and smiles. He reaches up to unhook the cuffs from your wrists. “Show me what you do to yourself while reading these things. Do you use your toy or your beautiful fingers?” He questions with his hands playing with your still erect nipples.
“Both”, you muster out, he smirks. He guide your hands down to your core as he assists you making soft circles along your clit. You moan arching you back to get more from the hand movements that are being created.
“Oh that’s a good girl. I bet you’re thinking of me? How good I feel inside of you.” You moan you eyes flutter close savoring the movements. “That’s such a good girl”, he removes his hands letting you take the show. He watches your body, your movements. In his eyes this is as close to heaven as he could ever get. “You’re so beautiful, can you cum for me?” He cups your face placing a gentle kiss on your lips. Your tummy coils, your pace quickens as you reach your end. The Euphoria rushes over you leaving you dazed and sleepy. “Good job baby.” He coos. Your legs clench around your hand as you work your way through you self inflicted high. You move your hand away from your pussy to reach out to his messy black hair and pull him in for one more kiss.
“Thank you Grayson.” You smile, “I missed you so much. I really wanted to see you before I start school tomorrow.” You add. He shifts in the bed finding something to clean your juices up with.
“ I know my love, it took a lot of convincing Bruce to let me come back early to give you a proper send off”, he winks wiping you down with an old towel. He tosses it to the side when done, and lays down next to you stroking circles onto your back.
You shift over to be facing him on the bed, “what happened?” You ask cupping his face in your hands. He just sighs and hugs you close.
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fbfh · 5 months
Note
tristan dugray with baby fever
STOOOOOOOP PLEASE PLEASE KEEP GOING
no bc we've already established a LOT about Tristin. he's dedicated. obsessivley so, even. once he HAS you he doesn't get jealous in a petty way as much as in a puffing out his chest birds acting eccentric to defend their turf way. when he gets jealous the pda goes in FULL SWING. he is so shameless and has just a little sprinkle winkle of bull energy. so you would think that his baby fever comes from this obsessive lovey dovey I want everyone to look at you and know you're mine place right???????? not quite. like it does but not till later. Tristin's baby fever is soul crushingly gut punchingly triggered by watching you interact with a little kid. Chilton is a k-12 school, so this probably started late in your senior year. there was some little kid who was new and got horribly lost and ended up in the high school building instead of the kindergarten building. you and Tristin saw her hiding behind a bench and you stopped to help her. Tristin stood nearby, watching the way you crouched down and introduced yourself in a gentle voice, the softness of your demenor to not scare her. you told her you get lost all the time, and it's normal for a new school to feel scary until you get used to it. you smooth her hair and tell her chilton is really fun and the other kids are nice. you tell her how great the cafeteria is and how cool the junglegym is at recess. you offer to help her find her kindergarten room, and Tristin watches with wide eyes and changing brain chemistry as you scoop up this adorable little kid wearing a backpack as big as she is and walk over to him.
"This is my friend Tristin. Tristin, this is Lilly. Do you wanna walk with us to the kindergarten building?"
Lilly tries to say hi but hides shyly as you chuckle. Tristin walks with you two all the way across campus as you two show Lilly all the cool statues and portraits, all the old trophys and class photos along the way. Tristin works his magic, charming giggles and smiles out of Lilly as you two turn a terrible first day into a pretty good one. You each hold one of her hands and swing her along as you finally reach the kindergarten building, smiling and giggling right along with her until she's safely dropped off at her kindergarten room. Mrs. Benning, the teacher, thanks both of you profusely. Before you part ways, you give Lilly a hug and high five for good luck. Mrs. Benning sends ahead a note so neither of you get in trouble for missing class, and I swear to god, Tristin does not stop thinking about it for weeks.
Flash forward a couple years, Tristin is almost out of college and ready to step into the marketing department of the family business, just like his parents and grandparents planned. One day he gets a call from his dad, telling him that his cousin Honor's baby shower is coming up soon, giving him the details of when to be there and what to bring, but he kind of stops listening after that. Honor's having a baby? like, his cousin Honor? the one that's not too much older than you and him? he stares at you sitting on the floor in front of a mirror, doing your makeup and wearing one of his shirts with the coffee he made you at your side, and suddenly he can't stop thinking about a little toddler that looks just like the both of you running over and sitting in your lap while you do your makeup. calling you mama, shaking a rattle or whatever toddlers play with, wearing those little pajamas with the feet on them... and now it's all he can think about. he knows his dad and grandpa have had his life planned out for him since before he was born, he always knew the timeline was graduate, marriage, kids, take over the family business and he really never had like... a resentful "I hate my destiny" phase with it. Up until high school he was very much in the "oh that's years away that doesn't have anything to do with me and my life yet" mindset. then he met you. and now, standing in the doorway of your shared bedroom in your shared apartment watching you get ready, Tristin is overcome with desire. he wants you. he wants a life with you, he wants to hear you say that he's the father of your child. he wants an unbreakable, irreversable bond of every possible kind with you. chemical, social, legal, eveything. he wants to cuff you, to lock you in. he wants to sleep at night knowing that your and his babies, toddlers, kids, are sleeping soundly in their cozy rooms right down the hall, that you get to sleep next to your husband Tristin, the father of your children Tristin. he wants to hear people call you Mrs. Dugray, wants to bump up his old man to a grandpa, prove to his dad how a dad should treat his children. he wants to break the godforsaken generation cycle that always seems to come with the generational wealth, and raise your kids to be loved and happy and secure. and in that moment, he speedran through all the stages of baby fever to stage 4 extreme terminal the baby fever is baby fevering kinda baby fever. god help you, the (surprisingly short) span of time between now and when you get pregnant???? he's going to be more insufferable than ever.
I will be writing more about how insufferable and nightmare and evil /pos tristin is with baby fever just not in this ask cause it's getting too long. send me more excuses to talk about this.
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yosajaeofficial · 16 days
Text
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AUGUST/SEPTEMBER UPDATE
Heya everybody! We’re back for a double episode of, “The Monthly Jayce Myles Comics Updates”! The reason why August wasn’t fulfilled like normal was due to college and how busy I immediately got when entering in, which is what I figured would happen so I’m not too surprised with it to be honest. I took some time in order for me to make a fulfilling update instead of doing a rushed one to pump out yk? We’re now gonna get to the updates and bonus content I’m gonna show.
Buckle your seat belts, close your eyes and take your hands off the wheel cuz this is gonna be a ride~
THE COMIC
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(OFFICIAL W.I.P: PAGES 28 & 31)
The comic’s gotten slower due to college, however, I really needed a break from it in general so I could prioritize my personal life and also refresh myself on drawing what I want to instead of rushing my age physically and turn 78 years old when I haven’t even reached 20 yet. Nothing much to say but showing the w.i.ps because of the slower progress, it’s getting there though. We got to 30 pages! Which means that the first section is sketched out (calculated to be approximately a fourth of the full chapter done, it could go lower or higher in the numbers depending on what I want/vision). I’m hella proud for getting 30 of them pages done honestly. A huge accomplishment for doing this story for a long while.
Ya’ll don’t really know, but I am indeed changing things here and there about the story where I’m shifting small details, doing redesigns, and reboots with other small things overall. I would be honest and say that’s where I’m progressing the most and not the debut chapter, I’m able to have a clearer vision of the story in my head and on paper when doing future chapters yk? I won’t go into details about redesigns or those details being changed since they’re hella spoilerish and a bit unnecessary considering that the JMC hasn’t even debuted yet. Ya’ll will get those details later when the comic functions and I will reveal more in future updates!
Also, last month Jae, no you haven’t drawn the turtles yet. However, we’re close to their debut for the chapter so keep strong! You’re doing great! :3
BONUS CONTENT: Jayce Myles Over The Years
Many of you know that Jayce Myles, whose name is in the title of the series, is our protagonist for this ROTTMNT comic! She’s my OC that I’ve had when going through my senior year of high school. We’re gonna be getting into a deep dive with her as a character and how their designs came to be during the process!
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This is the first ever drawing of Jayce that I’ve done, the day I made it is so vivid in my head because I was going through it… I was in my Pre Calculus class and I had failed another test after multiple attempts through the school year. My initial idea was to cry (which I did) but then I just started doodling on my phone and I created this drawing, then from there it was history. This was in 2022, not too long ago. I became a Rise fan a couple weeks after the movie came out (which I didn’t know at the time, it was a pure coincidence) and I wanted to create a Rise OC for a while. So that day in Pre-Calc, I was able to take advantage of my mathematical suffering and create my magnum opus (exaggerated). She didn't have a name at the time so it was actually a stand in for me. Jayce got their full name until a couple days later.
EVOLUTION OF JAYCE MYLES
(October 2022- February 2024)
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As you all can see, Jayce did indeed have lots of designs and ideas being sketched out while I created her as my official Rise OC. I had ideas for them to have an androgynous look from the start based off of my own self! I knew they were gonna have a Rise comic, but there were ideas for them to originally come from the 2012 TMNT universe with their "serious demeanor". It was quite interesting but there isn't much media of those ideas since they were cut a bit early on.
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(Older Renders of Jayce from 2022)
Their signature color looked like it was gonna be this denim blue for quite a while but then I scrapped it cuz I thought it wasn't showing their personality like how I want it to. There was also another scrapped concept where Jayce's demeanor would be more monotone and "soft" (as in a blank slate, which doesn't give her a true personality). It was cut because it made me think that I wasn't giving her the best potential as the protagonist then I should've been giving them. Jayce was more introverted and quiet, but now they're much more expressive and full of personality. Ya'll will see in a more better light when the comic debuts, I'm not holding back with Jayce's personality anymore.
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("Issue 1: Graffiti" Panels from page 1. The only page that was completed until the plot got scrapped.)
There were lots of pitches and concepts for the JMC over the years too, where lots of storyboards got drafted and one of the first of those drafts got their first page completed. However, I'm pulled a Richard Williams and kept being like "No, I don't like this" and kept going back to the drawing board. I like to look back on these old drafts especially after seeing the older interactions and how different they're gonna be in the official comics. I for sure was learning over 2023 and 2024...
Now finally, we're gonna touch on the last thing for this update~
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JMC'S FINALIZED PILOT (ADDITIONAL CHARACTER)
We are going to talk just a teeny bit about the debut chapter but I'm able to become vague without spoiling too much since lots of the older pitches were scrapped. But yes, this was when I came up with the idea, "What if Jayce had a job?"
That's where the idea of Jayce working at a deli joint came from. Where she would have to get a 9-5 and possibly fired, it was pretty funny when doing the drafts since I never knew how a real deli worked and my dumbass just used my mom's experience at Denny's as referenced (she walked out and quit after almost a year).
Thus, our pilot was born.
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You can go read a non canon comic I did that touched on this concept when it was fresh in development right here! [Jayce and Mikey Phone Call] & [Splinter/Randall and Jayce Interaction]
The shop itself was based off of a friend's film back in junior year. He made a FNAF parody called, "Five Nights At Fernando's" and it was such a stupid assignment but that gave me the idea of making use of the dumbass "Fernando's Shop" and make it a reality. So then Fernando's Taco Shop was created and we had the shop Jayce worked at. We already talked a bit about Archie and his deal in the first JMC Monthly Update and I can't say anymore due to spoilers but he was also involved of the creation of the pilot.
The older pitches had a cashier or a manager be like some NPC ahh character that never was gonna be brought up ever again but something in me thought it would be a cute idea to create an actual character for this manager that wasn't a stupid bossy ass hoe. It was very sweet in the drafts so I thought I could create more with that concept in mind.
Introducing: Rogelio Andazola!
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(Rogelio Andazola Evolution: 2022-2023 | Still Not Showing The Finalized.)
His design is one that is the most consistent when compared to the rest of the roster, I guess that I hit the nail with his because I couldn't imagine him any different. There are only minor changes like his gray strands disappearing (bro reverse aged) and his facial expressions are much more expressive after I played around during the soft reboot. Once again (and as annoying as it is), you will all see where I'm coming from when the debut chapter releases! Rogelio as a character has also altered his personality, he's based off of my grandpa, can't wait to show you how that comes into play in the story!
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Thank you all so much for sticking around for this very heavy update! I worked way too much for the photos to be sent on here and dug up lots of my old art in order for this to become a reality! It was actually insane that I kept lots of it instead of making it turn into lost media, I'm happy I got to show lots of it instead of having to make it the fuck up by memory (which I wouldn't have done in the first place and is an exaggeration). The comic is slaying in the runway and I'm working on it here and there at my own pace. Maybe next time I can finally show ya'll the turtles in the next W.I.P in the comic section. Have an amazing day/night everyone and we're on the way to victory!
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yourjughead · 9 months
Text
Red Car
Sweet Pea X Reader
Synopsis: You and Sweet Pea part ways after a Summer fling as you head off to college and he into his final year but is it really over? Or is it all just on pause?
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3rd Person - August
Owww ouch yn!"
"YNN at this point you must be hurting him with gauze on purpose" Sweet Pea laughed from the arm chair while watching you patching up his best friend on the loveseat across from him.
"He's just being a baby!" You rolled Fang' head to the side to gain more access to the stream of drying blood behind his ear.
"You're bed side manner is gonna need work before you start med school on Monday"
"Fangs my bedside manner is fine, right SP?!" Sweet Pea put his two hands in the air and looked away bowing out of the conversation.
"You're such a traitor" you laughed going back to your patient.
"You children will be missing me next week, no one to help fix you up as well as I can. You're done, hold this."
"Don't call us children, you're only a year older" Fangs rolled his eyes at you before sliding away and holding the gauze to his neck. You busied yourself packing the kit together before moving to the kitchen to tidy it away.
"How you holding up with that anyways Sweet Pea?" Fangs whispered across to the raven haired boy. Sweet Pea glanced at you humming in the kitchen of the trailer. Your departure from Riverdale was something he tried to push far from his mind. It was better you went on with your future he thought, leave him to fend his way through senior year alone. Fangs rolled his eyes at the silence to his question before standing and throwing on his jacket and heading for the door with a wave. You sauntered from the kitchen over to Sweet Pea, throwing one leg over him to eventually practically straddle the gang member in the chair. Chest to chest you ran a hand down his grinning cheek.
"Are you going to miss me YN?" You groaned leaning backwards from him, his hands around your lower back supporting your waist. Your leaving was difficult for both of you but this once Summer fling that had turned into more was not going to stop you from achieving it all.
"SP, I'm going to miss you more than you could ever know but you're going to have an amazing senior year, and I'll be back again in the Summer" he furrowed his brows to this.
"I wish I could go with you" he held your hand to his face.
"I know"
"I wish we could stay together" he dropped your hand, his eyes following suit. You slid from his lap to stand, catching his and pulling him up with you. He towered above you but in this moment seem so small. His hands snaked once again around your waist and your own arms drapped across his shoulders.
"We...we know this needs to end before I leave, neither of us are good at relationships, especially not long distance" you said quietly into his chest.
"I wish we were good at relationships"
"I wish I could make all your wishes come true "
"Oh YN, you already have" he said leaning down to kiss you sweetly.
~
You loaded your car as the chill of the early morning wrapped around you. Sweet Pea brought the final box from your house and into the boot. Sweet Pea fought back tears as he kissed your forehead. You slipped into the red car and off into the icy air. The end of an era.
~
Senior year flew by like pages of year book. Over time your studies enveloped all of your time and a certain brunette named Josie took Sweet Peas. You just seemed to keep missing one another in time, living up to your reputation of poor relationship maintenance. In some ways it was better to slowly drift from communication, the distance too much for both of you. By Christmas you didn't see sense of coming home to Riverdale, the loss of SP seeming too much to confront so soon to your leaving.
~
June.
The Summer sun began to sink behind the walls of Cheryl's Summer rager. The seniors of Riverdale High flowed from every doorway, the sound of music and cheer carrying through out the town. A familiar red car pulled into the drive of the tall manor. You swung your legs from the car and up the steps of the house. Fangs had contacted you inviting you to the party once he found out Sweet Pea was going with Josie. Fangs hated how he began to shed his serpent skin to fit in with her future popstar persona.
The sound of sweet music coming from one direction and loud scuffling from the other. The sound of drunken arguing growing in volume is where your feet took you.
Sweet Pea POV Simultaneously
Josie sang to the room of us all, so confident, so happy. She is really something special. I had worked so hard to get to a point of being ready for a girlfriend and she didn't want to be fully mine. Maybe that's better. I watched Josie sway from side to side singing her siren song, the same that trapped me months ago. Was this a feeling of entrapment and not infatuation? This thought worried me. The sound of shouting attempted to drown out Josie. The sound of Fangs shouting. Why is he shouting? I ran into the adjacent room, my best friend pinning a Bulldog hockey player to the ground.
"Call me that slur again! I dare you!" I heard him drunkenly shout, before I could seperate Fangs from him, one of the hockey head team mates swung a dinning room chair into my best friend, knocking him clean out. Oh he will pay for that, the greatest of debts. I flew across the room to the culprit, his collar in hand I pinned him up against the wall. As if on que, my fellow Serpents swarmed the room, chaos crushing around the room.
"Sweet Pea, leave him! You can't have any more arrests! " Toni caught me, trying to seperate me from him. This was true, I had had a rough year. I dropped his collar, and watched a smirk grow as I turned from him. I couldn't help myself. I swung back, a clean fist meeting his glass jaw, he sailed to the ground.
"Sweet Pea!" Josie shriekd amoung the madness. Crap. I looked to where some Serpents carried Fangs from the room.
"YN?" I found myself thinking out loud as I saw a y/h/c-ed figure lead the movement of my friend.
"What are you doing?! How do you think this makes me look?!" Josie interrupted my thoughts as her hands came flat against my chest. Before I could answer, Toni caught me by my wrist and hauled me towards the back of the house. A familiar red car came skating around the back of the house.
"Come on Toni, I need to get him somewhere I can look at him better!" YN. Her voice. I haven't heard her voice in so long. She wasn't expecting to see me by the look across her face from the driver seat. I wasn't expecting to see her. Toni dropped my wrist and ran for the car. I couldn't lift my legs from the spot.
"Sweet Pea? Where are you going?" Josie stood at the top of the steps.
"SP, we have to go" Toni signalled for YN to drive on, it seemed to pain her to tear her eyes from me.
Part 2
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hotchfiles · 8 months
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Hi!! Happy 100th follower bash! I wanted to request Seth Cohen with the prompt “what if you just want something, and you want it so bad?” If you decide to write it, I can’t wait to read whatever you come up with. Thank you!!
lari's 100th follower bash + send me a prompt and one of my boys for a blurb
seth + “what if you just want something, and you want it so bad?”
three times seth let you go and the one he didn't
┊ ┊ ⋆˚ 
      You were his best friend, two little kids watching cartoons and drawing around while your parents drank wine and talked about things you both didn't understand.
      As days and weeks and months went by, the more the drinking wine encounters became something only your mother would do, frequently going to the Cohens to talk to Seth's mom.
      "Your mommy looks sad."
      "She cries a lot too, more than me."
      Divorce is the word that has been making your mother cry apparently, and soon it makes you and Seth cry as well. Divorce means you're going away to a new city with your mom.
      Seth can't do anything about it but hug you tight and hand you the collection of not really great drawings he made of you, for you.
┊ ┊ ⋆˚ 
      You come back for high school, thank God, your mother's job is much more demanding now and she feels your dad can be more present than she is.
      It's like you never left, you feel. Seth instantly clings to you like he did when you were children, except this time his mind is going a thousand miles per hour. He wasn't exactly expecting you to come back and now his mind is completely torn into Summer obsessive thoughts and you.
      You spend hours and hours watching terrible sci-fi tv shows, he's drawing (more often than not, you're the muse), while you read or write on your journal. It's silent and comfortable and people often tease you about how you're the only one to keep him quiet for so long.
      Seth doesn't understand it much either, but he enjoys watching you, the way you furrow your brows when you forget a word, or how you take a deep breath following a surprised sound when something happens in the book you're reading.
      He's been thinking about how at peace you make him feel and he has plans to ask you to homecoming, but some sophomore beats him to it. And he could ask you to go with him instead, drop the other guy. But your eyes almost close while you're smiling telling him about it, so he just lets it go.
┊ ┊ ⋆˚ 
      2.027 miles. 31 hours drive. 4 hour flight.
      Writing came to you as drawing came to him, you both had collab comic books even. He should've known you wouldn't go for Irvine or Berkley. Or any goddamned college in California with a creative writing program. No.
      Northwestern University. Illinois. He heard you gush about it all senior year, and doubting yourself, saying you wouldn't get in anyway. But you did, obviously, you had everything they required and everything any university could hope for in a student. He knew you would get in and he obviously couldn't ask you to stay for him.
      You were just friends.
      And even if you weren't, he would never stop you from going after your passions, what made you happy.
      He visits you when he can. You both kiss and make out and tell each other the sweetest things in whispers only you can hear in those times. Nothing more comes of it though, you're busy and two thousand miles away. He accepts it, he lets go of the idea of having you just yet.
┊ ┊ ⋆˚ 
      Enough is enough though. And when you tell him about the internship opportunity outside of the country you don't smile with your eyes like prom. Your tone uncertain, your whole body weight being held by his arms as you both laid down on your terrible dorm bed.
      And as always he wants you. He wants you so bad. He wants you to stay. To ask him to go with you. Like he wanted you to stay with your dad after the divorce. Like he wanted to be your date for homecoming. Like he's been wanting to call you his girlfriend, his partner, his lover, his wife even.
      "Is it bad to want something so badly?" he says more to himself than to you, really, but still you turn your head to him, using his chest as a support for your chin.
      "I mean... It's just an internship I don't want it that bad—"
      "That's not—I want to ask you to stay. With me. Don't go. And that's selfish." He keeps his eyes glued to the ceiling as if he hadn't just made your heart skip a thousand beats.
      "Then just ask me, funny boy."
      His grip to you tightens, if that's even possible, and he's finally able to not let it go, to not let you go.
116 notes · View notes
kamaluhkhan · 2 years
Text
i'm not wanting anything (but your loving, your body, and a little bit of your brain)
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pairing: shuri x fem!reader
summary: being an avenger doesn't leave you much time for college life (let alone a girlfriend), you and gwen stacy accidentally show up to a halloween party in a couple's costume, and shuri is determined to prove who you really belong to.
warnings: allusions to PTSD and death, mentions of alcohol and partying and smut - fingering (both shuri and reader receiving), oral (shuri receiving), thigh riding....
song inspo: "thats what i want" by lil nas x
a/n: hello!! this is my first time posting a fic on tumblr and im so nervous but very excited because shuri has been on my mind for the longest time. reader is an avenger in her senior year of college and best friends/roommates with peter parker. this is set before black panther: wakanda forever, and after endgame but some things are different (the blip was only a year, steve and tony both died in the final battle with thanos). anyways, please enjoy!!
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before the blip, you had the whole work/life/superhero thing (mostly) down to a science. now, everyone was still processing the absolute mindfuck of half the universe being snapped away by a mad titan, only to be returned by a group of heroes one year later.
in the midst of it all, the girl you'd travelled across time and space for somehow ended up low on your priority list, but you found comfort in the fact that it was mutual. you were busy in new york, with college (senior year was kicking your ass) and avengers work (trying to keep the city safe with half the team gone and the others scattered across the universe was exhausting) and your internship at oscorp (basically unpaid labor, but you needed the credit to graduate). shuri spent most of her time catching up on what she missed, working on scientific and technological developments in wakanda whenever she wasn't travelling with her brother around the world for united nations or wakandan outreach reasons. there was only so much calling or texting that can be done before your relationship started to feel like an afterthought.
tonight was supposed to change all that.
harry osborn was throwing a 'halloween in january' party. shuri was in new york with t'challa, but she'd promise to keep this night free, and you promised the same. you were looking forward to being surrounded by a crowd of drunk 20-somethings, taking shots, dancing to music that was way too loud, feeling shuri next to you.
normally, you didn't dress up for the holiday - wearing a supersuit all the time kinda takes the novelty away from wearing a costume - but if halloween could be in january, you decided tonight would be the exception. you'd decided on a red lace bralette with a matching vinyl skirt, fishnet stockings, and a headband with devil horns. you didn't normally show this much skin. it was supposed to be a surprise for shuri, and the hope was that the outfit would drive her crazy. you had finished decorating your face with glitter and were about to swipe on some red liquid lipstick when the text signal rang from your phone.
shuri ♡
i won't be able to come to the party tonight - brother wants me to join him at an ambassador's dinner. i'm sorry. love you.
you knew that there had been one too many times when you had done the same to her - needing to attend to your avengers duties instead of spend time together, cancelling at the last minute on plans you were both looking forward to. you would see each other next time one of you happened to be in the same place, which started to feel less and less likely. that was just the way things were. you were fine with it. totally fine.
after you send shuri a quick no worries! i understand, you finish applying your makeup, taking one last look in the mirror, ready to party even if you didn't have your girlfriend by your side.
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harry osborn was shirtless, wearing only a red and gold tie, jeans, and round glasses. you were pretty sure peter choked on spit when harry walked up to you, chest sparkling with a mixture of sweat and glitter under the disco lights.
"magic harry potter, right?" you guessed, glimpsing the lazily drawn lightning bolt on his forehead.
harry grinned and did a little spin to show off his costume. "hogwarts student by day, stripper by night," he said, voice strong over the pounding music. he gestured to your outfit, eyes lingering at the top of your bralette. "you look amazing. and you...." he looked peter up and down. "damn."
peter was wearing an earlier model of his spiderman suit. you'd told him it might not be the best costume to wear when he was still very much clinging to the whole secret identity thing. he didn't particularly care, though: apparently, he overheard a certain heir to the oscorp dynasty gush about how hot spiderman must be under the suit, and how much hotter it would be to be tied up by his webs. needless to say, by the way harry looks equally entranced by peter as peter is by him, your guess is that his eavesdropping paid off.
"come on parker, let's dance." harry didn't wait for an answer, only pushed through the crowd of people. he turned around and locked eyes with peter, a flirtatious grin on his face. you spotted a bar in the corner, and bartenders dressed up as various halloween creatures who walked around with trays of bright neon shot glasses. when a skeleton offered you some, you grabbed a few before they moved on to a trio dressed up as the powerpuff girls.
"i don't have to go if -"
"go," you interrupted, handing peter one of the drinks in your hand. "one of us should get laid tonight."
even though the flashing multicolored lights made it difficult to know for sure, you guessed that peter was blushing. you clinked glasses, downed the shots. peter kissed your cheek.
"love you!" he said before disappearing into the crowd to find his wizard with shining abs.
you smiled, and made your way to the bar. next to the bar was a table of halloween themed snacks - candy, sugar cookies in the shape of ghosts, orange cupcakes and more - so you popped a few pieces of candy corn into your mouth before ordering a drink. you took another jello shot while you waited, this one sweeter than the last and neon green. looking around the room, you were impress by how decorated it was: orange string lights, pumpkins, ghosts and bats floating from the ceiling. you wouldn't have guessed that harry osborn would be into this kind of thing, assuming that he was a trust fund kid used to parties at yacht clubs, but as "monster mash" played through the speakers, you had to admit you were pleasantly surprised.
you scanned the room to see if there was anyone you recognized. you spotted a mermaid making out with a pink power ranger; a group of fairies doing body shots; someone wearing a zombie captain america costume (steve rogers version) and another in a zombie iron man suit, both of which felt more than a little insensitive. it hadn't even been a year since they were gone, and you didn't need the reminder. you glared at the zombies from across the room, and the captain america actually noticed you, offering some sort of awkward salute, like you were a war hero. somehow, that made everything worse and the room suddenly felt suffocating and you just needed some air -
that was how you found yourself on the balcony, overlooking the manhattan skyline. there were heaters outside, thank the gods, so it wasn't too cold. you could still hear the chaos of the party from behind the glass doors, but other than that you were alone - or so you thought.
"you look hot."
you turn around to see gwen stacy in all her glory, wearing an almost perfect replica of claire danes' angel costume from romeo + juliet. the two of you were co-workers more than friends, both working at oscorp along with peter and harry, but it was comforting to see a familiar face.
"and you look amazing," you complimented.
"here, you looked like you might need this." she handed you a sugar cookie decorated with orange frosting and black sprinkles, which you gratefully accepted.
you split it in half, handing one back to gwen before devouring your own. you washed it down with the neon orange drink you'd ordered earlier, before offering a sip to gwen.
"god, is that --"
"vodka and orange crush," you explained. "apparently harry osborn likes to color coordinate his parties like he does his lab notes. at least this makes sense."
gwen laughed, angelic and carefree. "you wanna go back inside? i've always wanted to dance with the devil, and i was hoping this would be my lucky night."
you'd been around long enough to know that gwen was flirting with you and even if you were totally, completely committed and in love with a certain wakandan, you were feeling a little tipsy (probably more from sugar than alcohol, it was hard to tell), and it felt nice to be complimented, to be noticed, to be touched. so, you let gwen lead you to the dance floor, your bodies close together. you let her flirt with you, and maybe flirted a bit with her back. you let people compliment your accidental couples' costume. you weren't sure how long passed, after a while you heard your name being called over the sound of "somebody's watching me" by rockwell. ironic, you knew.
instantly, you recognized the familiar accent and lilt of her voice. you turned around to see shuri, wearing a black satin suit lined with dark burgundy, the shirt underneath long gone, revealing only a black lace bra and a gold body chain and gods she looked so fucking hot right now, it felt like your entire body was on vibrate.
"shuri!" you exclaimed, voice an octave higher than usual, a little thrown off by her sudden appearance. "um, this is gwen."
"hey! it's nice to meet you. i like your vampire costume --"
"i'm not a vampire," shuri interrupted gwen before dragging you to the bar. she leaned against the counter and ordered a whiskey, draining it in one sip before practically slamming the glass back down. "what in bast's name was that?"
"we were dancing," you explained.
"it looked like the two of you were about to rip each other's clothes off," shuri snapped. "i didn't realize that was how you danced in america."
you bristled. shuri was the one who ditched you tonight, and now she was mad at you? "it's a party. we were just having fun. you're overreacting!"
"i showed up to surprise you, but maybe you'd rather go to bed with that angel over there."
"that's bullshit."
"no, what's bullshit is me walking in on my girlfriend grinding on someone else while wearing this outfit." her eyes grazed your body dangerously, and from the clench in her jaw you could tell she had to restrain herself. "so don't pretend you need me here. it seems like there are other girls you'd like to fuck instead."
shuri ordered another drink, but before it arrived, you dragged her to the nearest bathroom. one of the zombie avengers from before - iron man - was about to enter, but you beat them to it, effectively closing and locking to door behind you. you ignored the subsequent banging on the door. harry's apartment was huge; you were sure there was at least one more bathroom, and you couldn't bring yourself to care about whether that asshole got a uti or not.
while shuri remained standing, pacing back and forth on the marble floor, you leaned against the counter, watching her.
"what the fuck was that?" you asked, arms crossed over your chest. "you walk in here accusing me of what - wanting to cheat on you? do you know how ridiculous that sounds?"
"you have to admit, it couldn't have looked good from where i was standing. you grinding on some blonde girl, wearing a couple's costume. don't think i didn't notice that, too."
your cheeks felt warm, knowing that shuri might have a point. "in my defense, the costumes were a coincidence and the grinding.... maybe that was less of a coincidence," you admit. you walk over to shuri, placing your hands on her cheeks to get her to finally look you in the eye. she gently pushed you away, looking down instead, but stayed in front of you. "look, i get that it probably looked like --"
"like you wanted to have gwen's babies."
you took shuri's humor as a good sign, continuing with a soft smile on your face. "please know that i'm 110% committed to you. i would never want to do anything to make you think otherwise. but...i'm not going to apologize for dancing, and having fun, because shit's been....fuck, shuri, it's been hard."
"you don't think it's been hard for me, too?" she scoffed, finally meeting your gaze. "i was gone for an entire year, and the world just moved on, and - and maybe it doesn't need me anymore. maybe you don't -- " she let the words get caught in your throat, and she broke away from your gaze once more.
oh.
what you thought was a burst of jealousy was actually...something else.
"hey." you take her chin between your thumb and your index finger, turning her head to look at you. "hey. i don't care how many dates either of us miss, how many oceans or time zones separate us, you are my person and i'm yours, okay? i will always need you." you moved to drape your arms around her neck, and she instinctively grabbed your hips, hands dangerously close to your ass. your bare torsos touched, the cool metal of her body chain brushing against you and sending shivers throughout your body.
you could tell that her eyes were slightly glazed over, and wondered if she was about to cry. your heart ached as you placed a gentle kiss on her forehead, as if to let her know: i'm here, and i'm not going anywhere anytime soon.
she didn't say anything, but instead closed the gap between your lips. it was such a rush kissing her, after all this time. her lips tasted like whiskey, mixed with sugar from the candy you'd been eating. when you pulled apart you felt dizzy.
"shuri." you whimpered. she lowered her head to the side of your jaw, placing a kiss just below your ear before whispering:
"tell me what you need from me."
"so much," you answered. "i need you on top of me, under me, inside me."
shuri's lips ghosted yours, the hint of a smirk.
"come on, sithandwa," she taunted, letting her xhosa slip out. "you can do better than that. be specific."
"fuck," you groaned. you found yourself being pushed back against the counter, the marble cold against your bare skin. shuri didn't stop kissing you everywhere, her hands exploring your body. "i - i don't know. something, anything, everything. any time i try to get off i need to think of you, but it's never as good as the real thing. and now that you're here now...." your words trailed off into a sigh. right now, you couldn't make a reasonable argument, let alone a logical sentence, even if you tried. you just wanted to relish in the moment - to enjoy her.
you throw your head back when you feel her thumbs brush underneath the vinyl of your skirt, the slight pressure reminding you that she was here, with you, for you.
"fine, i'll decide," she said sternly. she gestured for you to sit on the counter, and you did just that. shuri adjusted her body between your thighs, spreading them wider. she shuddered seeing the red lace thong you wore, the lack of fabric covering you, and met your gaze once again, eyes darker than before. "you don't get to come if you don't stay quiet. so be quiet for me, yeah?"
you bit your lip and nodded. anything, everything. she smirked, pushed the fabric of your panties aside, and sunk two of her fingers into you, knowing you were ready for her. even after weeks, months, apart, shuri could always read your body, know what you needed, how you needed it. the answer was simple, really; like you said, it was always her, her, her.
she kissed you, harsh and messy, tongue and teeth, swallowing your moans as her fingers brought you closer and closer to your release. shuri pulled your bottom lip with her teeth before moving to suck on your collarbone, your jaw, your neck. she bit down on your skin, right at your pulse point.
"i thought - i thought you weren't a vampire," you attempted a joke, but that was a mistake. you'd let a low groan tumble from your lips. another when she let her tongue soothe over the sting from her bite.
"i don't appreciate the attitude," shuri replied, her voice steady, but the corners of her mouth, slightly upturned, threatening to turn into a smile, gave her away. she was loving this. "and, i told you to be quiet."
she removed her fingers from your cunt and promptly shoved them past your red lips. you groaned again when she kissed you roughly, the taste of you dancing across your tongues.
"we'll try one more time to see if you can follow instructions. make me come, and maybe you can finish after."
she swapped your positions and unbuttoned her pants, pulling them off along with her briefs, as you got on your knees before her.
there was a joke here about the devil worshiping an angel, but you were too focused on her. her smell, gods, her taste - it was too overwhelming, and all you wanted was more. you'd spent your whole life on your knees for shuri if you could: worshiping her body, worshiping her.
you draped one of her legs over your shoulder, giving your tongue better access. shuri tugged on your hair slightly and you moaned, sending vibrations up her body.
"bast, that's it," she groaned. you added a finger, while your tongue worked her clit. "fuck. i missed you."
you brought her to the edge, stayed with her as she came. she probably expected you to get back on your feet right away, but you stayed, adding another finger and sucking her clit. she moaned your name.
you pulled away slightly. "one more, pretty girl," you promised. "can you do that for me?" she nodded furiously, and you went back to work.
when she came once more, you kissed her ankle before releasing her leg. shuri pulled you up to your feet, sucked the taste of her off your tongue.
"i missed you, too." you pull away, breathless, heart racing. "do i get to come now?"
shuri hummed. her thumb wiped the smudged lipstick below your lip. she studied you, admired you, like you were a fucking work of art that belonged in the met, like you hadn't just fucked her through two consecutive orgasms in the bathroom at a rich kid's upper east side apartment while michael jackson's "thriller" played outside the door.
"take off your thong." you did as instructed. she pulled you towards her, and lodged a leg in between yours. your cunt brushed against the skin of her thigh, back and forth as shuri guided your hips. "i can't believe you got all dressed up like this. absolutely sinful. and these...."
her hands moved to your thighs, nails digging into the flesh and dragging across your fishnets, effectively ripping them.
"shuri!" you protested, though it sounds like a moan.
"i'll buy you more. now, are you gonna come for me?"
the sound of her voice, the feeling of her skin against your heat, the smell of the two of you intertwining, it was too much. your orgasm crashed into you, and you were grateful that shuri held you through it. you kissed her once more before removing yourself from her grasp, smoothing down your skirt and looking around for your underwear.
"where are my...."
you looked over as shuri tucked your red thong into the inner pocket of her jacket.
"i'm guessing you'll buy me replacements for those, too."
she flashed you a shit eating grin before putting on her own underwear. she then pulled up her pants, not wiping your release from her thigh. the thought of her walking around, leg sticky with you, made your pussy clench.
the sound of someone banging on the door brought you out of your post-orgasm haze.
"holy fuck! hurry up!" they shouted.
"given your costume, i would say that was an unholy fuck," shuri joked, adjusting your headband for you. you nudged her playfully, rolling your eyes.
"how about we stay for a few songs, steal some cupcakes and drinks, and then head back to my place for round two?" shuri nodded.
"perfect."
before you opened the door, you shot her one last devilish grin. "oh. and this time, i'm in charge."
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the next morning, shuri woke up to an empty bed and the smell of burnt cinnamon.
you were sitting on the small window bench in the corner of your room, a tangle of purple yarn on your lap and crochet needle in your hand. even though there was frost on the window, you only wore a pair of boxers printed with the word 'sunday' and cartoon suns, and an empire state university sweatshirt.
"sithandwa? the bed would be warmer with you in it."
you turned to look at her, snuggled under your brightly colored duvet, eyes half open.
"this should help."
you walked over and wrapped a purple scarf around her neck, sitting cross-legged in front of her. shuri sat up, but kept the duvet wrapped around her. there was still glitter decorating your face from last night, and shuri reached out to brush some away.
"you made this for me?" you nodded.
"rhodey taught me how. said it would help with...." you trailed off, not wanting to go into the details of your insomnia. "anyways, t'challa mentioned at our last team meeting that you're going to vienna after this. we went there once to take down a hydra base and gods, it was freezing."
shuri kissed you, pulling you into her blanket cocoon so that you were inside as well, straddling her waist. you broke apart, and she put her hands under your shirt. you shuddered at the sudden contact, her skin cold. her thumbs rubbed circles under your breasts.
"it gets pretty cold in new york, too, doesn't it?"
"yeah, but i can just make another one," you explained, letting your finger trace the details of her face, her sharp jawline. shuri took your hands in hers.
"no, i mean....i can still wear the scarf you made me when i stay in new york."
you brightened like one of those cartoon suns. shuri staying in new york for more than a day, more than a night, hasn't happened in so long. you yearned to wake up next to her regularly, kiss over coffee and bagels, take the subway together, show her the tourist sights you yourself haven't been to since you were a kid - the statue of liberty, coney island, the works.
you stopped your daydreaming there, not wanting to get too ahead of yourself. life is busy. plans change. people leave, for a little bit or forever. it happens.
"like for another day?" you asked, clearing your throat to subdue the excitement in your stomach.
shuri shook her head. you knew it would be too good to be true.
"like for me to move to new york. to live with you."
wait, what.
"shuri. wakanda's your home just as much as new york is mine. i know this long distance thing has been tough on us, but i would never ask you to leave your home, your family."
shuri said your name softly and gently brought her palms to your cheeks.
"you're not asking. i'm offering. the dinner i had to attend last night was to convince the UN to greenlight our wakandan outreach centre in new york," she explained. "if it goes through, my brother suggested that i be the one to lead it. on site."
"and that's what you want?"
"what i want to be wherever you are. i want to be part of your routine. i want to meet your friends, skip work and spend hours in bed together. i want to be here for you - for parties and movie nights and graduation."
at that word, you put your hand up. "i'm going to stop you right there before you send me into an existential crisis."
shuri grinned. "but yes to the rest of it?"
"yes. yes, of course." you pushed her onto the bed so that you were both lying down, facing each other, your legs tangled together. "so...when is this happening?"
"probably in a month, maybe a month and a half. there are still hands to shake, contracts to sign."
"bureaucracy," you sighed. shuri giggled, and your heart fluttered at the thought that you would get to hear that sound on a regular basis in person, not just through cellphone frequencies.
"i am, however, staying for a few more days while my brother takes care of things in vienna. so you're not getting rid of me just yet."
"now that is great news." you kissed her once, then twice.
suddenly, there was a knock on your door.
shuri readjusted your position so that the length of the duvet covered both of your bodies. "come in pete!" you said once she was done.
the door opened and peter parker's face came into view, along with a plate of those ready to bake cinnamon rolls that must have been fresh out of the oven.
"there's extra if you want," he offered.
"that'd be great, thanks." you gratefully accepted the plate, swiping some icing from the edge and licking it off your finger. "what's the special occasion?"
peter cleared his throat. "no special occasion."
you glanced the hickey on his collarbone. "oh, so harry stayed over last night and you wanted to make a good impression on him. breakfast in bed, domestic husband, sort of thing."
"that's not --"
"that's exactly it!" a voice from the kitchen interrupted.
"good morning, harry!" you replied, smiling tauntingly at peter.
"harry, i don't think we've met!" shuri added. "peter has told me so much about you...."
peter groaned and flipped you both off before shutting the door.
"thanks for the cinnamon rolls!" you shouted.
there was a pause before the door opened slightly. a curt, "you're welcome," was offered before it was closed once again.
you got up to put on a record as shuri devoured a cinnamon roll.
"you know, i'm really happy you're staying for a bit because i actually need your help with some things." you ripped off a piece covered in frosting and stuffed it in your mouth.
shuri raised her eyebrow, waiting for you to explain.
"my electric toothbrush has been weird - i can't figure out, for the life of me, what is wrong with it - and i've asked peter to fix it one too many times at this point," you continued, ticking off checkboxes in your head. "i wanted to talk to you about some potential upgrades for my suit that i would love your opinion on. oh, and i'm pretty sure i also broke my vibrator." you grinned sheepishly. "i didn't even bother to ask peter about that one because we don't need to be that close."
shuri stiffled a laugh, muffled by a mouthful of cinnamon and cream cheese frosting. she swallowed. "how do you even break a vibrator?"
"i don't know!" you exclaimed. "that's where you come in."
"baby." shuri wrapped her arms around your torso. "if i'm staying around for a while, you won't need a vibrator."
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jisungsbff01 · 28 days
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.like i need you.5.
...pairing…Chan x reader
...w.c... 2.3k
...genre…slice-of-life, college au!
...warnings…anxiety attack, mentions of not eating, insomnia
...characters...Y/N, (OC) Lilith, (OC) June, Chan, Jisung, Hyunjin(rest of members mentioned)
...synopsis...No one ever really knows what they wanna do in their 20s, but Y/N has always known what she was going to do. So, she began the journey to her dream and is so close to reaching it with no distractions at all. Until she is thrown into a project with Hyunjin, a fellow senior in college, and he introduces her to a few of his friends...connecting with one in particular...
Her whole plan is soon thrown off the track she’s had it on for 21 years….
A/N: I haven’t properly edited this chapter yet, but I wanted to get something out.
 Now that our regular class finals were over, Hyunjin and I were working overtime for the day we had left for our project. We were so close to getting where we needed it to be for his presentation of it and I was getting antsy. Currently, I was holed up in the producing studio I knew that later he would be at the dance studio across town. And, if I am being honest, I haven’t spoken to anyone in almost two days. Not even Hyunjin to discuss the project, granted he was too busy perfecting his routine to notice. In turn, this meant that I haven’t properly eaten… I had no one to drag me for coffee and something to eat and I have been too wrapped up in either the studio or my room on my computer to notice anything else. 
My phone has long been put on Do Not Disturd and I was finally getting somewhere with the background vocals. I’ve never been this picky with my songs, but I think since the main music part is mostly just me, I am overthinking it. I’ve never had to do main vocals and I am by far the best singer there is, but in the end had to for this so I’m kind of stuck with it. 
Although it was on Do Not Disturb, my phone would still occasionally light up with various notifications, and the last time it did, it was 5AM. My body was aching and I was having a hard time keeping my eyes open. I knew I was not going to be able to continue on properly with being as tired as I was and I hadn’t slept in over 24 hours and a little nap wouldn’t hurt. I set an alarm on my phone for 45 minutes and rolled up my hoodie as a make-shift pillow and I rested my head on it and let sleep take me in it’s comforting embrace.
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
I was awoken by someone’s hand on my shoulder, calling my name. It was Han Jisung. How the hell did he get in here? I shoot up straight and look around, slightly confused as to where I was…but it all floods back rather quickly, “Ji? What are you doing here?”
He meekly brushed a few strands of hair out of my face as he responded, “I was getting a studio for Chris and I before he got here and the receptionist asked me to check in on the person in here because they’ve been in here since yesterday morning…have you eaten anything, Y/N?”
I stretch widely and got up, back to my seat at the desk and shake my head, “Too busy. I’m okay, though- thank you for checking on me I probably needed to wake up soon anyway-wait…what time is it?” My body panics slightly.
Jisung looks down at his watch and responds, “It’s 6:30, why?”
“Shit, I was supposed to be awake an hour ago…it’s okay, Ji. Again, thank you, but I have to get back to work. But, please tell the receptionist I’m okay.” I dismiss him rather quickly.
He mutters something as he walks out hesitantly. 
I continue to work, going in and out of the recording booth…deleting and rerecording clips here and there, adjusting the bass and trebel, the balance between vocals and instrumentals, going back through the whole song until I was satisfied. Which eventually happened. Only, it was 8:45 by the time that happened. But, finally I was done…and it was basically a whole new song, for the most part. I knew by this time Hyunjin would be at the dance studio, so I decided to head straight there.
Picking up is favorite drink along the way, which the shop owner decided to give me for free this morning for some reason, I made it to the studio by 9 exactly. I quietly made my way into the building, trying not to disrupt anyone and found Hyunjin stretching to soft music. The temperature outside left a bite of cold in the air in the studio, but I’m sure once he got moving he would be grateful for the temperature. 
I mumbled a ‘good morning’ to my friend as I handed him his drink and I sat on the couch, legs folded under me. The tall man went from being on the floor to towering over me in a heartbeat. 
“So I got a call from Jisung this morning…” he started off.
“Oh, yeah? Saw him this morning briefly, one of the few people who have woken me up that haven’t gotten their eyes clawed out, by the way.” I respond with a gravelly voice.
“Mhm, he told me that you haven’t been out of the studio in almost 24 hours?” He states frustratedly. 
“Yes, I got caught up, what’s the big deal, Hyun?”
“The big deal is that you haven’t eaten either, Y/N…you need to eat, and sleep.”
“Don’t worry, I grabbed a snack on my way here, ate it already…mom.” I mumble the last part, because I felt like I was being scolded by my mom.
“Okay, well you probably didn’t eat enough, so what is going to happen is you are going to take a nap here so I know you are actually sleeping and once you are awake, we are going to get you some real food.” 
“I’m not gonna say no to sleep right now, that’s for sure.” 
He tosses me his hoodie and I opt to use that as a blanket, once again, I fall asleep rather quickly and stay that way, even over the music and the dancing in the background. You would think the sounds would keep me from falling asleep, normally they probably would, but in the moment, they lull me to sleep instead. 
I only wake up once and it was when Felix and Chris stopped by, Chris had a blanket in hand and was more than ready to swap out Hyunjin’s hoodie for a proper blanket. He sat next to me, just above my head…and for some reason, I rested my head on his thigh. He stilled for a moment, before relaxing and laying his hand on my arm. I couldn’t help but fall asleep once again. 
-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-
I wake up from the feeling of strong nausea. And an extremely tight chest…
I shoot up from my position on the couch, interrupting whatever conversation everyone was having, and darting to the bathroom. Nothing came up, but I sat there dry heaving for a while. I’ve always hated getting sick in this way, I always felt helpless and no matter what, I always wanted my mom. I suddenly started crying, I felt like shit, hungry but too nauseous to eat. 
My blood sugar was definitely low and my mental health was now taking a drop. And I realize how hard it was getting to breathe.My breaths come out in sporadic huffs as I try to catch my breath just so I could begin to take slow breaths, to calm myself down. I didn’t want anyone to see me like this, especially not Chris. With shaky hands I message Hyunjin, asking him to come into the bathroom.
Within a couple of minutes, he’s running into the enclosed space. My hair, once pulled up into a bun, was now hanging in the hair tie by my shoulders. It was hot, too hot and I felt like I was going to throw up, even though I knew I couldn’t. He took a hair tie off his wrist and pulls my hair up, my head lulls back as he does so and he grabs my hand and sets it over his heart. There’s a loud roaring in my ears and I can hardly hear what he is saying but by the gesture, I understand that he is attempting to get me to breathe at the rate he was.
Suddenly he grabs his phone and dials someone, I still can’t hear him and I am at the point where I genuinely feel like I’m dying. My chest hurts, my throat hurts, and my lungs are beginning to ache from lack of proper oxygen. I see Hyunjin stand up and pull away to wet his hands under the faucet, coming back to put cool water on my forehead and the base of my neck. Out of the corner of my eye I see movement, but am unable to focus…or even care. Hyunjin goes out of view and Chris comes into view, my hand is pulled to his chest and his heartbeat is more noticeable than Hyun’s. He grabs my face so that I am looking at him in the eye and I begin to faintly hear him,” In, out, in out.”
He keeps a steady tempo to it as he continues to instruct my breathing and he hesitates to ask, “Would it be better if I hugged you?”  
I nodded, knowing that deep pressure has helped with attacks like this in the past for me, and once he wraps his arms around me, I am able to relax. My breathing doesn’t let up right away, and I am a little more aware my my surroundings, but I am able to request that he hug me tighter. I sigh out in relief once he gives me what I ask and I rest my head on his shoulder, noticing that Hyunjin had left. 
Once I calm down a bit more, he asks if I need a minute alone. I nod my head in response, needing to wet the cotton-mouth I have going on. He lets me know he was just going to be back in the studio whenever I was ready to come back. I rinsed out my mouth and walked out the door anyway, wiping the tears that gathered in my eyes. As I entered the dance studio, I noticed we had a few more additions to our little gathering. Everyone was here at this point, I made eye-contact with Chris as everyone still socialized amongst each other and signaled for him to come outside the door. I saw him grab my bag and say something to Hyunjin before following me out.
 He made sure the door closed behind him as I spoke, “I think I’m gonna head home, I’m just not feeling it.”
He watched me closely before taking a deep breath through his nose, “Not feeling it, or not feeling good?”
“Both?” I stated, unsure.
“Have you eaten anything?” He asked, knowing the answer already.
“No.”
“Let’s eat before you go home.”
“Chris, I’m not really-” “No, for my peace of mind, I need to see you eat something. Jisung told me how he found you and that you hadn’t eaten. You need to eat, even if it’s something small.”
I think about it before giving in and he’s driving us to a local cafe. 
Chris and I sat and ate for about an hour before he took me back to my apartment, walking me up. 
I felt the warmth of his body following behind me, guarding me…like I’m going to run at the first possible moment. I knew he was worried about me, he was the only one who really hid it well around me. And the past few weeks we’ve grown closer, we’ve gotten each other to open up and have even spoken countless times through text and over the phone. It was in this moment I truly felt feelings friends aren’t supposed to have for each other. I wanted nothing but him in my life. In this moment everything was quiet with him, the stress was gone when I was with him. I was happy and safe when I was with him. 
With him, everything was perfect.
I pulled my keys out of the pocket of my coat, in doing so my bag slid off my shoulder. He caught it, slipping it off my arm so that he could hold it. Before I could turn the knob to open the door, he softly grasped my upper arm, “Y/N, wait…”
My head cocks slightly to the side, “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
He looked like he was in pain, like, physical pain. I grab his hand off my arm, my fingers knotting with his and let out a hum in questioning, asking for an answer. He nods his head and whispers, “Yeah, I’m okay, I just…”
He suddenly pulled me closer to him, still speaking in a low voice, “Tell me if you don’t want this.”
“Want wha”
He kissed me, and it took a heartbeat for me to completely wrap my head around it and reciprocate but once I did oh. I parted my lips, asking…begging for more. I hear my bag drop to the ground as he brings one hand up my body to rest on my hip, the other on my jaw, the tips of his fingers curling in my hair. I pulled him closer by his waist, wanting our bodies welded together at this point. I take a chance and nibble on his lower lips, earning a groan from deep in his throat. My body filled with heat and I wanted more. But I didn’t get more. He pulled away, his body tense and shaking slightly. 
“Yeah, I’m okay, pretty girl.” He said to me, still holding me close to his body. For a few moments, we stayed like that. Until he pressed a few more light kisses to my lips, then my right cheek, left cheek, forehead,nose, jaw, and finally to my neck. I gasped from the sensation, my body still humming. 
He actually pulled away this time, leading my body back and handed my bag back to me, turning the knob that I had barely gotten a chance to unlock before he kissed me. He turned my body, pressed a chaste kiss on the crown of my head before leading me in my shared apartment.”I will see you later, pretty girl. Get some sleep, yeah?”
I nodded, pressing my lips into a fine line, closing the door as he walked away.
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Thank you for reading, let me know what you thought!
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