#my peers other students no not really lol
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ALSO im dressed like all black plus baggy tee n sweats plus my beanie n lil safety pin dangly earring n like ok personally i thought it was not giving feminine much or explicitly and like standing at the end of the bus line boy is there and we're both at the end ppl are already standing there's only standing room and he tells me go ahead of him and it's like sir????? we are both going to be standing in the same bus what was tht for except to misgender me grrrrr stabbies you but then i guess there's also the i am so tiny factor and also the my gender expression thru my clothes switches wildly depending on my mood n like to an extent it's like we're all regulars on the bus he has definitely probably seen me b4 ive seen him countless times he probably knows what i am lol but it still gets me so irritated grrrrr
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queerstudiesnatural · 1 year ago
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google search what to do when your student calls you their best friend and wants to hang out with you during recess instead of their peers
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thottieonline · 28 days ago
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PENN’S HOTTEST VIRGIN
LUIGI MANGIONE X VIRGIN! FEM READER
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IN WHICH — Reader goes to her first Frat Party at Phi Kappa Psi, partying with Frat President Luigi Mangione.
WARNINGS — SMUT!! Porn with a Plot! Minors DNI!
CONTAINS — Loss of Virginity (Duh), Religious themes, PinV! Oral (Fem! Receiving), Praise! Blasphemy — we knew it was coming. Reader wears glasses (a bit self indulgent, lol)
NOTES — So. Much. Dirty. Talk. Luigi’s a little rough but we love it! Like this is just straight PORN I’m so sorry!! Anyways, this is my first smut on Tumblr, so excited to be here!
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To Y/N, it seemed that it was a social norm to have had sexual experiences or have been in a relationship, especially by your second year in one of the biggest party schools in the country — So how was it possible someone as beautiful as Y/N could remain untouched?
She knew her male peers gawked at her and shamelessly spoke about her whenever she walked by, often hearing the things they wanted to do to her in passing, ultimately sending shivers down her spine.
She was innocent, not stupid.
Considering she came from a family devoted to their Catholic faith, they had tried their best to shield her from a life of “sin.” However, as she grew older, she started to question her religion.
Would I really go to hell for doing this? If I wasn’t meant to be doing this, why does it feel so good?
Those questions eventually lead her to make more impulsive decisions. After all, you’re only twenty in one of the biggest party schools once.
Ask for forgiveness, not permission — The voice of her roommate Blair spoke into her head. Blair being her voice of unreason, she encouraged her to be more wild, thus leading to them getting ready for a frat party at one a.m on a Tuesday.
“B, you still haven’t told me what frat we’re going to.” Y/N yelled over Blair’s loud music, Blair only sparing a glance at her and refocused on her hair. “We’re going to Kappa.”
Phi Kappa Psi was one of UPenn’s biggest frat houses, gaining a reputation for throwing the wildest parties on campus, competing with other frat houses on who could garner the most attention, in-campus and off-campus.
Other Fraternities pale in comparison to Phi Kappa as they miss one important element — Luigi Mangione.
Luigi Mangione managed to make a name for himself as a fourth year student, making a lasting impression on his fellow peers and professors. Being exceptionally gifted in Computer Science, Robotics, and Charisma — Mangione had the respect of everyone around him in the palm of his hand.
Mangione being five-foot-eleven, athletic and intelligent with unruly curly hair and a smile to die for — It was simple, really. Every man wanted to be him, while every girl prayed for the opportunity to be the next one he took to bed.
She was no exception — though she never voiced her desires out loud. Y/N often imagined his lips trailing down her neck, his lips creating a suction on her sensitive skin, sucking on her vanilla lotioned skin to the point of bruising.
God only knew how much she wanted to be marked up by him. Her virgin mind constantly thought about sex, but she couldn’t think about anyone else but him. No one else had her attention like he did and that was exactly how she liked it.
She only thought about Luigi fucking her to the point where she cried, her pussy being used and overfilled with his cum. She’d imagine him continuing to fuck her after she lost count of how many times she came, the glasses she normally wore on her face were nowhere to be found.
Y/N imagined Luigi calling her his perfect slut, praising her ability to take all of him like a champ.
“God it’s like this pussy was made for me. Tell me, how good do I fuck you, baby?”
“Such a good fucking slut for me, N/N.”
“You’re so fucking pretty, baby. Let me see you.”
Just the thought of him made her thighs clench together. Luigi was the only one she would ever let fuck raw. She needed to feel all of him, every inch and every vein of his Italian cock. She wanted Luigi to ruin her for other men, fucking her so good to the point all she can remember is his name.
It’d be even better for her to wake up to such a deliciously painful reminder of him when she’s hardly able to walk the next morning.
“Okay, I’m done.” Blair spoke, quickly snapping Y/N back to reality. She looked at her roommate, seeing she had finished getting ready for the night.
Since it was a frat party, Y/N and Blair were dressed in simple yet sexy outfits— Y/N opting for a black tank top, pairing them with denim shorts that were tight on her ass and her beat up sneakers.
She’d done her hair hours ago, opting to go straight, putting her trust onto the anti-humidity products she put in her hair to last all night.
“Bitch you look so good.” She smiled, Blair giving her a full 360 of her outfit. “Thank you, baby.” Blair smiled at her compliment.
“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re trying to get fucked tonight, looking all sexy.” Blair teased, making Y/N roll her eyes, fighting back a smile.
“So what if I am?” She challenged, half-jokingly.
Blair squealed, “She’s finally coming out of her shell! Took almost two years but we’re here.” She quickly wrapped her arms around Y/N. “C’mon, let’s get you fucked up tonight!”
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Before she knew it, Y/N had stepped foot onto Kappa grounds, already trashed with red solo cups and a couple of passed out partygoers on the front yard — It looked like a scene straight out of Project X.
Careful to not step on those passed out on the grass, Y/N and Blair made it to the front door, pathetically guarded by one of the seemingly drunk pledges. “Damn, looking good mamis.”
The two giggled at the slurred voice of the young man, “You two on the list?” He asked. Before Y/N could open her mouth, Blair already began talking to him.
“Not really, but I think you can make an exception for tonight?” Blair flirted, placing her manicured hand on his bicep, giving the young man false hope of something happening later on.
“Fuck,” He uttered under his breath. “Yeah, you two can come in. Enjoy, ladies.” He stepped out of the way, letting Y/N and Blair come through.
“You gotta teach me how to do that.” Y/N chuckled. “It was like you didn’t have to try at all.”
“Y/N, please, you can totally do that. You just overthink things too much. You didn’t see how he was looking at you at the door?” Blair chuckled. “Now, let’s get you some liquid courage — God knows how much you need it.”
With that, Blair took Y/N’s hand and led her to the dining room, where the infamous Kappa jungle juice was placed. Blair poured herself and Y/N a full cup — the combination of the sweet cranberry juice and the unforgiving strong scent of liquor nearly sent her to a drunken state.
Out of habit, she did a silent prayer before she downed her drink.
“Fuck, that’s strong.” She groaned to herself, the bitter taste of the liquor lingering on her tongue. Y/N pushed herself to drink more — It wouldn’t be a complete first frat party experience without getting shitfaced drunk.
Blair giggled at the sight, “I’ll be right back, N/N. Stay here, ‘Kay?”
“Mhm.” Y/N hummed, acknowledging her. She continued to drink, silently praying once more to get her through the unforgiving taste of the drink in her cup.
God, if you let me get through this, I promise you—
“Yeah, I’d say the prayer is totally necessary.” A deep voice spoke close to her, interrupting her moment with the man upstairs. Y/N turned her head to the side out of curiosity and there he stood less than a foot away — Luigi fucking Mangione smirking at her.
“Say, were you also raised catholic or was that for dramatics?” He teased, making her blush as she looked down at her feet before looking up at him again.
“Definitely both.” Y/N laughed, her free hand playing with her gold cross necklace that laid nicely on her chest.
Luigi’s gaze flickering from her eyes onto her necklace. He admired how the gold cross complimented her glistened skin. The last piece of Y/N’s devotion to God contrasting with the less-than-holy outfit she had on drove him insane.
“I’m Y/N, by the way.” She spoke, the liquor giving her the courage to introduce herself — something she could’ve never imagined doing stone cold sober. The sound of her voice made him flicker his gaze from her chest onto her eyes, decorated with her signature frames.
He smirked to himself before telling her — “I know who you are, pretty. I’m just surprised to see you here, that’s all.” With that, he wrapped his arm around her shoulder, pulling her body closer to his, her heart racing faster with just a simple touch.
“You do?” She questioned.
Mangione was two years above her and to the best of her knowledge, they didn’t have any classes together. It was a really big school, after all.
“You don’t know?” He asks, taking in how her eyes glimmered with curiosity as she shook her head. “You’ve seriously never seen the Penn Crush page on Facebook?”
“You know, I don’t really use Facebook like that — So, I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or not.” She smiles, watching him pull out his phone to look up the infamous Penn Crushes page on his screen.
A few seconds pass by and there she was — Y/N L/N all in her glory. She scrolled through his screen, seeing the countless pictures taken of random students that deemed was submitted to the page — yet a lot of those pictures were of her.
There was one picture of her taken from afar where she sat on a random bench, presumably waiting for her next class, and there was another one that she recalled Blair taking a picture and uploaded on her Instagram story. It must’ve been screenshot and submitted as she saw the amount of likes on the post.
She continued to scroll until she saw one post where the caption immediately grabbed her attention —
Penn’s Hottest Virgin, Y/N L/N in a throwback post with the Penn Catholic Service Association. It’s great knowing she’s kept her promise! #virginityrocks
“Oh My God.” Y/N laughs at the post. She recalled joining PCSA when she first came to the school to have an outlet where she could be with others like herself.
She’d thought it’d be a good way to stay connected to her religion while forming new friendships, becoming a dedicated member of the association and getting involved with her community.
Y/N recalled the event from the post as she had to prepare a speech on why it was important to her to keep her promise to God to maintain her purity. At the time, she didn’t mind that people knew if she was a virgin — It was the whole point of the speech!
However, as time passed on and she had since left the association, it was definitely something that she wouldn’t have shared now, nearly two years later.
She read through the comments, barely processing the countless amounts of praise she received unbeknownst to her. “I didn’t think I was on anyone’s radar,” She joked, “Especially as the hottest virgin.”
“Yeah, you’re definitely a fan favorite.” He told her, not before he pulled her impossibly closer. “Have you kept your promise?” He teased, seeing the almost immediate effect he had on her.
She didn’t know if it was the combination of the crowded room they were in with the liquor or the fact that Mangione’s lips were on her ear, asking a question that sounded so innocent, yet so filthy.
The heat rising in her body was getting too much. Y/N felt his hazel eyes following her every move, from the way she subtly pushes up her glasses to the way she clenches her thighs together to relieve the ache in between her legs.
“Yes, sir.” She smiled at him, “But, I think I wanna break it.”
“You do?” He cooed, tucking her hair behind her ear. Luigi knew she wanted him as bad as he did, but he needed those words to come out of her mouth.
She bit her lip, holding back her words for the last time. “I want you to take my virginity.”
With that, he put down his cup on the remaining space on the counter, taking her hand in his and leading her up to his room.
The hallways were completely closed off. It was quiet, a complete one-eighty of the chaos that ensued everywhere else. Luigi unlocked his room, holding the door open for her as she entered what she would describe as the closest thing to heaven.
Y/N turned around to see him close the door and without hesitation, he pulled her by her waist and placed his soft, plump lips onto hers, starting her off slow and sensual — It was the perfect first kiss, she thought, but she knew the slow pace wasn’t going to be enough.
She wanted him so fucking bad, wanting to prove to him that she could take it like the good fucking girl she is. She’d been waiting for him all this time and she couldn’t let it go to waste. Y/N pulled him impossibly closer to her as she began to channel her insatiable desire for him, Mangione following suit.
His hands trailed from her waist and latched onto her hips, fueled by desire as he backed her onto his mattress, their bodies creating a soft thud on the bed. Never breaking the kiss, Luigi ground himself onto her denim shorts, making her moan into the kiss.
“Fuck, that feels so good.” She whimpered, breaking away from their kiss. He was orally fixated on her, his lips continuing their delicious assault on her sensitive skin.
“Gonna mark you up real nice, baby.” He uttered, eliciting a moan from her in response. “You like that, hm? You wanna be marked up by me?”
“So fucking bad.” He smirked at her confession, placing his lips back onto her neck and trailed down to her belly button. His strong hands roughly pulled down her denim shorts, Y/N’s body clad with her tank top and her soaked white thong.
The cool air in his bedroom didn’t help relieve the ache in between her thighs, needing him more than ever. “Bow on your panties? How cute.” He teased, pushing her panties to the side as he licked a bold stripe on her slit.
Her hips jolted at the newfound sensation, Mangione smiling at her reaction. His hands gripped onto her hips as he continued to use his tongue on her relentlessly, needing her to get himself drunk. Luigi couldn’t help himself but gather every last drop of her juices on his tongue, tasting her virginal pussy.
A string of sounds escaped her mouth as his tongue continued to work through her folds, circling his tongue around her clit before sucking on it. Her knees buckled at the suction of his lips.
“Fuck, L-Luigi.” She whimpered.
It was all happening so fast, her mind in a haze as Luigi held her up, throwing one of her legs over his shoulder as he continued to give his all, devouring her as if she was his last meal.
He had love for the game, so determined to make her first time worth it — wanting her to scream his name loud enough so everyone could know he was the first one to fuck Penn’s Hottest Virgin.
“Say it louder, baby. Need everyone to hear you.” He heaved, replacing his mouth with his long, skilled fingers.
She cried in pleasure as his two fingers stretched her out like no other, his digits pressing right up against that spot deep inside her that she could never reach on her own. Her glasses had slipped off her face, laid somewhere on his mattress.
It would’ve frustrated her to not be able to see, but with how good he’d been giving it to her, her eyes had stayed shut, the poor girl only being able to keep them open for only a few seconds until the next wave of pleasure.
“Put them back on for me, baby — Please.” He pleaded, loving how her glasses decorated her face. That was her signature, she’d never been without her glasses since the first time he saw her.
She reached out for her glasses, feeling the hard plastic beside her, putting them back on her beautiful face.
“Did so fucking good baby, listening to me.” He praises her, taking out his fingers and putting his mouth back on her needy pussy.
Y/N was so fucking close, her legs shaking around him as he devours until there’s nothing left — Luigi drinking up all her juices as they spread from her pussy to her thighs and undoubtedly his bedsheets.
Mangione had taken everything from her at that moment — her body, mind and voice. It was all too much, her needy hands reached into his bed of curls, gripping onto them as she buried him impossibly deeper between her thighs.
“Oh fuck, oh fuck Lui, I’m gonna cum, I’m gonn-” She cried out, tears running down her face as his name rolled off her tongue, his name being said so many times as if it were a prayer.
It was so sinful, so sexy, and he loved it.
“Cum on it, baby.” He urged, his tongue desperate for another taste. Luigi had been hooked from the first drop and had a craving for more. His tongue trailed from her hole onto the top of her folds, swallowing the remaining juices on her pussy.
“You taste so fucking good.” He praised, kissing her right inner thigh. Luigi could spend his entire life reliving this moment, worshipping her body.
Her body was in a near paralyzed state, the only signs of her liveliness was her chest rising and falling as she tried to catch her breath. Her glasses were now sitting at the tip of her nose, making her look so much sexier to him.
Luigi tried to fight back his infamous shit-eating smirk, but it was no use. He smiled proudly, showcasing the infamous fangs that everyone had been obsessed with, Y/N included.
Seeing those fangs reignited the fire in her body, needing to feel him again. Y/N lifted herself up and got on her fours, crawling to the edge of the bed where he remained kneeled.
There was nothing else on her mind but him. She wanted him to ruin her so fucking badly and so did he. His hazel eyes were clouded with lust as were hers. His dick was uncomfortably strained against his shorts, begging to be inside her virgin pussy.
Mangione leaned closer, his hands gently grab on to her face as he brings her closer to his face, closing the gap between them.
He held her face as their lips moved in sync, much hungrier than before, Y/N tasting the combination of the sweet jungle juice and herself on his tongue. Her hands trailed down his toned body, feeling his hard cock on the palm of her hand.
“Not sure if all of that is gonna fit inside me, Lui.” She joked, as she pulled away from the kiss, gently squeezing his bulge. It felt so fucking good under her hand, the feeling of how hard he was for her made her so much wetter.
“We’ll make it fit. I’ll make sure you’ll take all of it.” He promised, sealing it with a kiss. He pulled down his shorts, revealing how big he was — His tip glossed with precum. 
“I’ve wanted you for so long, N/N — wanted you in my bed since I first saw you.” He confesses, guiding his dick between her folds. His tip rested right at her pussy, inching in slowly as she winced in pain.
“Want me to stop, baby?” He coos, caressing her soft thigh.
She shook her head, “I-I can take it, Lui—S-Swear.”
Satisfied, he pushes himself in her even more. “God, you feel so fucking good — wanna fuck you so hard, but we gotta wait, right?” He teased.
“Fuck me, Lui.” She pleaded, pulling his face down so she could whisper into his ear, the hard plastic pressed against the shell of his ear — “I want you to fuck me until I can't walk straight."
With that, he pushed himself all the way inside, his dick harder than ever before. The burning sensation intensified, a small shriek erupting from her throat. “F-Fuck.” Y/N gasped.
The initial pain soon subsided as he continued to thrust, his hips connecting to hers — Luigi & Y/N becoming one. She cried with pleasure as Luigi’s pace intensified, making her tits’ jiggle out of the skimpy tank top, her eighteen karat gold chain smacking against her chest.
It felt so fucking wrong, yet so fucking right.
He wasn’t ever supposed to see her in that way — For fucks’ sake, he wasn’t even supposed to know who she was!
Mangione was her fantasy come to life. She loved the way he felt, his cock going in so deep inside her he could see an imprint of where he was. He couldn’t resist, taking her hand in his and placing it on her stomach.
“You feel that? I want you to remember it f-forever.” He groaned. Her cunt grasped him hard, holding him even tighter.
“Oh fuck! Y-You make me feel so fucking g-good, baby.” She whimpered.
“Yeah?” He mocked, grinding his hips deeper into hers, his pace slowing down a bit, making her feel every inch and vein of his. She clenched around him once more, Luigi groaning at the sudden tightness. He worked harder, hips snapping into hers as he picked up the pace once again.
Y/N loved how full he made her, the way he didn’t leave a single part of her body untouched.
“God, it’s like this pussy was made for me. Tell me, how good do I fuck you, baby?” He gripped on her hips, smiling at her fucked out expression.
“So,” It was all she could get out, her speech becoming more incoherent the closer she got. Y/N placed her manicured fingers on her clit rubbing her sensitive bud in circles, matching his pace.
Her body squirmed at the dual stimulation — It was all becoming too much. Y/N wanted this to last forever, never wanting to forget how his big dick felt inside her body, fucking her like the slut she knew she was.
“Luigi!” She screamed in pleasure, reaching her peak. Her walls pulsated around him like crazy, nearly sending Luigi into his climax. As much as he wanted to cum inside her, the thought of him cumming on her beautiful glasses sent him into overdrive.
God, he just loved her fucking glasses.
“Please baby, I just wanna cum on your glasses. Can I, baby?” He pleaded, pulling out of her. He took his needy cock in his strong hand, he inching closer to her frames.
He was so close, how could she deny him such a pleasure?
Y/N nodded, excitedly grabbing his dick from his hold and jerked him, aiming him closer to her frames. “Like this?” She asked sweetly as he shuddered around her touch.
His cum quickly shot out of him, landing on her glasses and coating her vision. “Just like that, sweetheart.” He assured her.
Luigi released himself from her touch, wanting to mark her up with his cum, aiming for below her stomach. He released a string of curses under his breath, chasing his much needed relief.
“Fuck, that was definitely the best sex I’ve ever had.” He breathed, feeling so fucked out as he laid next to Y/N’s body.
At that point, her hair had been messed up as the anti-humidity spray was no longer holding up as some texture had shown up, adding onto her “sexed out” look.
Even with her hair wild and free, she still managed to look so beautiful — Luigi couldn’t get enough.
She shook her head, playfully rolling her eyes at him. “Please, you’re just saying that.”
“I mean every word I say, Y/N. I’ve thought about you so much, it drove me insane — Do you know how hard it is to run a fraternity when there’s only one thing on your mind?” He ranted, now getting up from his spot on the bed.
She shook her head, knowing he couldn’t see her from his private bathroom. She was amused with the Italian. “Didn’t know it was so hard on you, Mr. President.”
“Very hard, actually.” He stated, returning with a damp cloth and wiping her body down. “Especially when she was known as the hottest virgin.” He joked, making her laugh.
Once she’s all wiped down, Luigi then uses his own personal glasses cleaning kit from his bedside drawer, spraying the liquid onto the stained glass, cleaning her frames with such care.
“You’re too much, Luigi.” She smiled, adoring the man beside her. “So detailed, too.”
“I’ll prove it everyday if I have to, Bellisima.” He professes, placing her frames back on her face with such care. “I’m not letting you go after everything you said to me.” Luigi pulls her in for another kiss, reassuring her he was there to stay.
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whatsk-poppinhomies · 1 year ago
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Pairing : Han Jisung x F!Reader TW : anonymous friends to lovers type beat ; physical fighting ; reader is bullied ; angst ; fluffy ending ; Word Count : 8.9k A/N : Haven't even started writing this one yet but I know it's gonna take a bit, I hope the wait is worth it!! I hope that this is good! I kind of changed things a little bit, but I feel like it's still good... right? It has a k-drama feel to it... Not proof read!! Request : Anonny : Hello! If your requests are open can you write something for skz han? Where han is a popular person that everyone likes and he doesn't know the identity of reader but they are able to have really nice conversations. He thinks he found the person he's been talking to and starts dating them and reader agrees to help the person with talking to him. But han actually starts talking to reader and realizes that they were the person he fell in love with. Reader didn't tell him their true identity bc they were told he could never love someone like them. I hope that makes sense.
An anonymous chat room… What could possibly go wrong? It had started as a way for other students to get help with certain subjects without the judgment of their peers over not knowing enough. Soon enough, like most things, it had completely lost its original reason for being made, and now it was being used for anything but studying. There were chat rooms for dissing people, chat rooms for hooking up, and then there was the more… safe chat rooms, for people that were just lonely and wanting to talk, people that were too awkward or shy to have conversations face to face. Everyone had an online identity that no one else knew about… A different persona… It was scary… But sometimes it was nice to just… Talk to someone. 
JiHizzy : Hey! You online? 
Your phone vibrated with the message, and you couldn’t help but smile at the familiar sound of the notification. You had been talking to him for weeks now, and it was the one part of your day that you truly looked forward to. 
JustAnotherGirl : Yeah! What’s up?
JiHizzy : Finally got back to my dorm. I was trying to study for finals…
JustAnotherGirl : I’m gonna guess that didn’t work out for you? 
JiHizzy : Crazily enough, I ended up at the bar instead of the library. 
JustAnotherGirl : I don’t know how you could possibly get the two confused lol
JiHizzy : It’s a friday night, I don’t think anyone was at the library. Weren’t you at the bar too? It was packed. 
JustAnotherGirl : Mm… Nope! I don’t really party like that, I was too busy studying for my finals. 
JiHizzy : Ooh, the innocent type? I like that.
JustAnotherGirl : Are you flirting with me? 
JiHizzy : I might be… You know the acronym of your username is jag… all you need is I and you’d be jagi to me. 
JustAnotherGirl : That must be the alcohol talking…
JiHizzy : Not at all. You’re just my type. I really want to meet you.
JustAnotherGirl : Oh, would you look at the time? We should get some sleep! Goodnight! 
While it was supposed to stay an anonymous chat room, some people were just too popular to stay hidden longer than the first week. One of those people was JiHizzy, better known as Han Jisung, the most popular guy on campus simply because of his looks. All of the girls wanted him, and all of the guys wanted to be him. He was the top of the totem pole, and that put you at the very bottom. 
If the two of you were to walk past each other on campus, he wouldn’t even spare you a passing glance… But with the promise of anonymity, you were able to talk to him every night. You were able to know what it felt like to be liked by someone like him. You could never meet him though, if he found out who you really were… He’d stop talking to you immediately. You didn’t want to lose him… Even if you didn’t truly have him. 
///
JiHizzy : Are you in class right now? 
In the silence of the classroom, the vibration of your phone was much louder than you thought it would be. Everyone turned to look in your direction, and you quickly grabbed your phone and placed it on your lap, hoping that if another message came in, it would be silent. 
JiHizzy : I know you are, you’re such a good girl… WAIT DOES THAT SOUND WEIRD!? I’M SORRY!! 
JiHizzy : I was just thinking that maybe… Maybe you could tell me what class you’re in…
JiHizzy : And I could get a glimpse of you… Or who I think is you… I just want to have a face to go with the name…
You held in your sigh as you felt your phone vibrate incessantly against your lap, chewing on your bottom lip as you attempted to focus on your studies, but it seemed like he wouldn’t let up unless you responded. 
JiHizzy : PLEASE!! 
JustAnotherGirl : Why is it so important? I like being anonymous… I like talking to you…
JiHizzy : Because I like you, and I can’t stop thinking about you, and I want to daydream about you…
JiHizzy : But it’s kind of hard to daydream about someone if I don’t know what they look like.
JustAnotherGirl : Well, daydream about what you think I look like. It’s probably better than how I really look anyway. 
JiHizzy : You’re talking like I’ll stop messaging you or stop liking you if I meet you…
JiHizzy : You don’t think I’m that kind of person… Do you? 
JustAnotherGirl : I don’t know who you are… But it’s just easier like this for me… 
JiHizzy : Alright alright
JiHizzy : I’m sorry if I upset you…
JiHizzy : But hey! I heard that they’re releasing an update soon where we can actually talk to each other on the phone!
JustAnotherGirl : Can’t people tell who other people are by their voice? 
JiHizzy : Idk… But I want to call you when it comes out. Can we at least do that?
JustAnotherGirl : Maybe… I’ll think about it… I have to study now. So do you! 
JiHizzy : Right! Okay, I’ll message you later! 
He daydreamed about you… He thought about you… You wondered what this image looked like, the girl that he thought you were. You were sure that it looked nothing like you, and it was better that way. He was so popular, you didn’t want to tarnish his image if he was even seen talking with you, let alone walking beside you… although you were sure that something like that would never happen. 
///
When the call feature was released, everyone was so excited. People were testing it out as soon as their apps updated… But you were dreading it. Texting guaranteed staying anonymous, but hearing someone's voice, even if they didn’t know what you looked like, a voice was a way to identify someone. Even Jisungs voice, anyone and everyone could tell it was him coming if they heard him talking. His voice was distinct, it was his and his only. You didn’t know how distinct your voice would be, and the only thing you had going for you was the fact that you didn’t talk much at all. 
A time that you’d usually be counting down to now had your stomach twisted up into knots, your knees folded up against your chest as you tried to think of anything but the inevitable phone call that you knew he would ask for. “What’s got you all worked up?” Your roommate asked as she walked into your room. As if things couldn’t get any worse, she just had to be back in at a normal hour. 
Of course you had gotten paired up to dorm with the most popular girl on campus, it was just another way of lifes mysterious twists and turns supposedly. She was absolutely ruthless, and while you had asked to have your room changed at the beginning of every semester, it miraculously could never be done. As if college wasn’t hard enough, having to reside with her was just added stress. 
“Fine. Ignore me. I didn’t want to talk to you anyway.” She mumbled, dropping down onto the ridiculously large and disgustingly luxurious bed that took up almost the entirety of her half of the room. She was rich, of course she was, and she took every opportunity to flaunt her wealth to everyone on campus, and you were no exception, you just got the brunt of it. 
“I’m gonna take a shower real quick… Do you have to use the bathroom before I get in?” You asked, keeping your head down so she didn’t look at you like the peasant that you knew she thought you were. She scoffed loudly, and out of the corner of your eye, you saw her flick her wrist in the direction of the bathroom. 
JiHizzy : You awake? Don’t tell me you’re sleeping already! 
JiHizzy : You haven’t been online in 3 hours! Come onnnnn!
JiHizzy : Are you ignoring me?!?!?! :( 
JiHizzy : Did I do something… Say something wrong? 
JiHizzy : Ahhh… Maybe you are sleeping… Okay 
JiHizzy : Goodnight! Sleep well!!
You never took your phone into the bathroom with you, not just because it seemed unsanitary or unhygienic, you also couldn’t afford to potentially drop it on the tile floor and bust the screen. Maybe you should have, but again, you didn’t think that your roommate would go through your phone. You were pretty sure that she wouldn’t even touch something that belonged to you. You had never been more wrong. 
The vibrating of your phone had caught her attention, and maybe if it had only gone off once she would have ignored it, but Jisung was a spam texter. “Hmm…” She hummed to herself as she snatched your phone off the nightstand, and her curiosity quickly turned to annoyance when she saw just who had been texting you. “No way… There’s no way!” She shrieked, glaring at your phone. 
As the story goes, the popular guy should automatically be with the popular girl… that’s how it always goes! She wouldn’t allow something like this to happen… It just couldn’t. She was being a good person, she had to look out for Jisungs reputation, that’s what it was. Luckily everything was anonymous, you were anonymous… He wouldn’t have to be embarrassed to like you… He wouldn’t even have to know it was you. 
“What are you doing?” She was still holding your phone as you walked out of the bathroom, and your stomach dropped as you thought about what she could have been doing to your phone. Why would she even have it. “Look… I don’t touch your stuff, please don’t touch mine.” You mumbled as you scurried over to grab your phone out of her hand. 
“Jesus, don’t have a tantrum.” She muttered, rolling her eyes as she turned her attention back to her own phone. “Maybe you should silence your notifications before leaving your phone unattended.” Her words only worried you more, prompting you to check what she could have been talking about, and you could feel the anxiousness creeping up further and further until it had taken you over completely. 
She had seen the notifications, and you’d be a fool to think that she didn’t know exactly who it was that was messaging you. Would she tell him? It would be absolutely humiliating, it would destroy you, you couldn’t imagine the way he and his friends would react to finding out that it was you who he had been talking to. Should you tell her not to say anything? “I…” No… It might make her say something. Maybe she’ll forget about it in the morning. That would be the best case scenario. 
“I think Han Jisung and I would be the perfect couple, right? I mean, we’re both popular, we’re both insanely attractive! That’s why I feel so bad for him, you know? It’s not like he’d willingly go for a complete loser, but this stupid anonymous app is really getting his hopes up.” You were right there, she knew exactly what she was doing, but she still had the audacity to look over at you with the fakest smile. “Were you saying something?” 
“N-No…” You stammered, pushing yourself up off your bed and heading to the door. “I’m gonna take a walk, I’ll be back later…” She didn’t say anything to you as you left, simply laughing along with the multitudes of friends that she had on call. Had she told them? Were they all laughing at you? Of course they were, she was right… Why would he want to be with someone like you? You were a nobody, a speck of dust, no… Not even that. People notice dust… you were less than that. 
But why didn’t you deserve to be happy, even if that meant staying behind the safety and security of your phone screen and a basic username? Were you not allowed to have anything? Not even some sort of happiness brought by anonymous interaction? Isn’t that how everything on the internet is nowadays anyway? No one really knows each other… So why is it such a big deal if you talk to him? Why should you be shamed for doing it the way you have been? Could you not even have this one thing? 
Being outside was like a breath of fresh air, at least for a moment, but those thoughts brought on by the words of your roommate were suffocating. Should you even respond to him? He thought you were sleeping already… you could tell him you had been busy… His messages have the ability to help you feel better in an instant, and you needed that now. You clicked on the notification and quickly typed in your password to open the app, and not even a second passed before your phone was vibrating in your hand. 
JiHizzy : Hey! There you are! 
JustAnotherGirl : Hm… Were you just sitting and waiting for me to come online?
JiHizzy : and what if I was?? 
JiHizzy : you know I can’t sleep without talking to you first. 
JustAnotherGirl : I didn’t know that though…
JiHizzy : well now you know! :D 
JiHizzy : so… the call feature came out! I want to call you! Can I?
JustAnotherGirl : uhm… I don’t know… 
JiHizzy : are you in your room? Is your roommate sleeping? I can talk quiet!
JustAnotherGirl : no… no it’s not that…
JiHizzy : I want to hear your voice… please? We can talk about anything! Anything you want! 
JustAnotherGirl : I guess… 
In a second your phone was buzzing, Jisungs screen name front and center on your screen. What a foolish feature this is, why not just give people your phone number if you’ll just talk on the phone? What’s next? Video calling? What if…? You would never do that… You couldn’t… He wouldn’t want to see you anyway. 
Your hands shook as you accepted the call and brought your phone up to your ear. “Hehe, hey! Took you a bit to answer, I thought you’d just ignore me!” His voice came with a face, one that you could perfectly envision in your mind. His smile, the creasing of his eyes as he probably laid back against his pillow, one arm tucked under his head, perfectly at ease with everything. He was so lucky and he probably didn’t even realize it. 
“Oh… uh… no. I was just… trying to find somewhere to sit.” You lied, looking around at the line of streetlamps that illuminated the sidewalks that led to different buildings. “H-Hi…” You stammered, and you knew exactly why you were flustered, why you were so nervous. Jisung was practically a GOD here, and you might as well have been an earthworm with how much lower you were than him. If anyone found out about this, you were sure that the both of you would be humiliated, but for vastly different reasons. 
“You don’t have a couch or a bed or anything in your dorm?” He asked, and you felt stupid, this whole thing just felt insanely stupid. So what if you didn’t have a couch or a bed in your dorm anyway, not everyone was made of money! What was he going to do, judge you for it? “Well… Look, if you need help or anything… I-” 
“I don’t need help.” You stated quickly, and you truly didn’t. Sure, you didn’t have a couch or a flat screen television in your dorm, but you had a bed, and that was more than what most people had, so you had no reason to complain. “I’m actually-” A particularly loud gust of wind whipped around you, the force so strong that you could almost hear it crackling in your speaker, and it whipped up freshly fallen leaves around you. 
“Are you outside?” There was a slight panic in his voice, although you weren’t sure why. It’s not like you hadn’t braved elements far more atrocious than wind before. But then again, he didn’t exactly know you well. With the image he had in his mind of you, he probably thought you were too pretty, too perfect to be outside in the wind, potentially getting your hair messed up. “Did you go outside just to talk to me? I-If I knew you were going to do that, I would have just said to wait until a different day to call. I don’t want you to get ill.” 
You clicked your tongue against the roof of your mouth. Was he always this caring, or was he just pretending? Only the people closest to him would know, and you weren’t close to him at all. Surely to be as popular as he was, he’d have to be some kind of an asshole… That’s how the movies and the shows always depict the popular guys. They were too good for people like you… But… He didn’t know you were a person… A person like you. “It’s fine, really. I’ve walked home in thunderstorms before… A little gust of wind isn’t going to take me out.” 
There was a sigh from his end of the call, and then the rustling of what sounded like sheets or blankets. “Well tell me where you are. You’re already out, and I wouldn’t mind walking a bit to come see you. I really want to know you… I can get my shoes on real quick and-” You hung up the call before he was finished, your breath held in your throat, and you didn’t let it go until you were certain the call was ended. It was rude, sure, of course it was… But why was he so god damn pressed on meeting you!? Why wasn’t this good enough for him too?! 
JiHizzy : Did the call cut out? Was it the wind?? Are you okay!?
JiHizzy : If you don’t answer me, I’ll… I don’t know… I’m not a computer wizard but…
JiHizzy : I know people can trace things and… Please tell me you’re okay. I’m worried.
JustAnotherGirl : yeah… I’m fine… 
JustAnotherGirl : my phone battery is dying… 
JiHizzy : Oh! Okay! 
JiHizzy : Get inside quick, please. Charge your phone and message me in the morning… yeah?
JustAnotherGirl : yeah… 
JustAnotherGirl : Goodnight…
JiHizzy : Goodnight beautiful! 
This was getting worse, it was only going to get harder… Maybe you should cut ties with him now… It would be better that way, wouldn’t it? It wasn’t paying off to selfishly keep him, basically trapped behind your phone screen because you were scared of the embarrassment that would come along with actually meeting him. You needed to let him go…
///
Your roommate was laying in bed, a sheet mask over her face and the bedside table lamp had been dimmed. She was sleeping, at least that’s what you thought, until the door latch clicked as you shut it and she jumped up. “What were you out doing, huh?” The questions immediately started, and you shook your head, going over to your bed and yanking back the blankets. “I know that you weren’t out with… him. He would drop dead before being seen with the likes of you, ya know?” 
She snickered annoyingly, and you whipped around, your face scrunched up as you tried to keep the tears at bay. “How? How do you know that? How should I know that?! Do you know him?! Do you really know him?!” You asked, or, more like begged for her to give you the answers. You weren’t really sure why you were going to her of all people, maybe you were just desperate to hear that… that you would be good enough… Maybe not for him… But for someone. 
The loud laugh that poured from her lips was like a gut punch, and you dropped down onto your bed, absolutely humiliated, devastated, you felt like a fool. “Listen… I’m gonna do you a favor… You know, since we’re… friends…” This was bound to be an awful idea, you were sure of it, but you felt like she was going to keep talking anyway and… It was beginning to feel like you didn’t have a choice. “I think it’ll be a win for both of us… So, I’ll meet him, as you… And you get to keep talking to him at night. He’ll fall in love with me and my beautiful looks, as everyone always does, and… Well, you won’t be lonely. How does that sound?” 
It sounded terrible, it sounded awful, it was an elaborate ruse that surely no one would fall for… But… He wouldn’t ask you to meet him anymore… You’d still talk to him… She wouldn’t bother you or even have a reason to try to embarrass you on campus. You could stay hidden, it could work… It could really work. “Fine…” You mumbled, running your hands over your face, trying not to think too hard. “You… I don’t want to get involved too much with… What the two of you might do… But if he brings it up in the chat… You’ll have to… Tell me…” It was the last thing you’d ever want to know, but if this was going to work, you’d have to give him up just to have him still… It sounded crazy. You’d never have with him what she could… All you would ever be able to have are late night conversations, living out a fantasy through the tellings of your roommate and him. It would have to be good enough. 
“Oh, don’t worry… I’ll tell you everything!” She clapped her perfectly manicured nails together, and you knew there was something sinister about it, but this felt like the only way. “Get some sleep, we have a lot of planning to do tomorrow. This is going to be great!” 
///
“Where did you tell him to meet me… I mean… you?” She whispered, reading over your shoulder to try to see what the messages on your phone said. This was it… Today was the day… She’d probably tell him to delete the app since he finally met “you”. Was it worth it? Probably not… But you had been alone for the longest time before this all happened, you’d be fine with being alone after this as well. Nothing would change for you… But she would get everything she wanted… As if she didn’t have it all already. 
“The… The fountain, at the center of campus…” You mumbled. Would he really think it was you? The two of you sounded nothing alike… But would he be able to pick up on that? Probably not, he didn’t seem like the type that really cared for things like that. He was so excited that you finally agreed to meet him, the messages were flooding in and she had been right there to read all of them. 
JiHizzy : I’m on my way to the fountain now! 
JiHizzy : I can’t believe this is finally happening… We’ve been talking for almost 4 months now…
JiHizzy : Isn’t this crazy?!?! 
JiHizzy : I’m just a little nervous… I hope you don’t mind.
JustAnotherGirl : I don’t… I don’t mind at all…
Have fun… You thought to yourself as you stood at a distance, watching as Jooyi stood at the fountain, switching between sitting on the edge and standing every couple of seconds. She fumbled with the edge of her skirt, and fixed her hair, then checked her makeup. She was nothing like you… Would he be able to notice, even if you had only talked through text and occasionally on the phone? Was he able to tell your personality through little things like that? 
Then you saw him, practically sprinting towards the fountain, it was like everything was in slow motion. Did he even know who to look for? Would Jooyi fit the image of you that he created in his mind? You leaned against the light pole, your phone clutched against your chest… One message and you could ruin this all for her… But it would cost you too much, and you would have nothing to show for it, nothing to gain. People like you weren’t made for people like him, he would never stoop so low as to even look in your direction. They were made for each other… Who were you to ruin things? 
“Jisung!” You heard her voice ringing in your ears, and you looked up from the pavement to see her waving in his direction, and he paused. Did he know? You watched him closely, and you saw the smile slowly beginning to form on his face before he sprinted over to her. His arms wrapped around her waist in a tight hug, picking her up and spinning her around before setting her on the ground. It would never be you, that could never be you… You made two people happy today… It should feel good, but you felt sick, and you quickly turned away, rushing back to your dorm room. You didn’t have to be there to watch it, you’d hear all about it when she came back. 
///
JiHizzy : It was… Wow… 
JiHizzy : Finally meeting you in person! It’s amazing! 
JustAnotherGirl : Yeah! I’m so happy that I finally got to meet you! 
You sniffled softly as you looked over his messages. They wouldn’t be the same again, nothing would. He’d talk about everything that he did with “you”, and you’d just have to respond as if… as if it were truly you there. This… This deal… It wasn’t fair at all. It was just rubbing into your face everything that Jooyi got to do with him… And he was the one unknowingly telling you… She was evil… But she was a master at being just that. 
JiHizzy : Well… Do you want to talk on the phone? I mean… 
JiHizzy : We’ve already met each other and… I don’t know why… 
JiHizzy : I could ask you for your number… But I don’t want to get rid of the app.
JustAnotherGirl : oh? Why?
JiHizzy : There’s just so many memories on here…
JiHizzy : Sometimes when I’m alone or sad… I go back through our messages. You really know how to make me happy…
JustAnotherGirl : Really…?
JiHizzy : Yeah… Really. 
JiHizzy : Don’t tell anyone though! The guys would totally mock me for that.
JustAnotherGirl : I won’t… I won’t tell anyone.
Jooyi burst through the door, shopping bags lining her arms and she dropped them carelessly to the floor before falling back onto her bed, a loud, ear piercing squeal escaping her as she kicked her feet. “He’s so amazing! He’s so much cuter up close! He wants to take me on a date this weekend!!” She squealed again, and you felt disgusted. Did he want to take her on a date, or did he want to take you on a date? Was it her looks or was it your personality that he liked? 
“I’m… Really happy for you, Jooyi.” You lied through gritted teeth. You hated hearing about it, you hated hearing her in general, but hearing her talk about him as if she was the one who had put in the work over four months to get him to like her… It was unfair. You faked a yawn and rubbed your eyes, acting tired just to be able to wipe your tears without her noticing. “I’m gonna go to the library and study. I’ll see you later.” 
She was lost in her own world, but she sat up as you reached the door, your backpack slung over your shoulder and your hand on the doorknob. “Hey!” You put on a smile as you turned to face her, waiting for her to continue. “Did he message you? Did he talk about me? Hmm?” 
You felt your phone vibrate in your back pocket, you knew it was him, but you shook your head. “Haven’t heard from him… Maybe he deleted the app… I don’t know. I have to study though, I’ll let you know if he does.” She sighed softly, letting her head fall back against the mattress, she was back in dreamland. Her whole life was a dream… And yours was a nonstop nightmare. 
///
The library was practically empty when you walked in, you could hear every squeak of the floorboards as the one or two other students paced the shelves of books. You could almost hear the buzzing of the fluorescent light that hung over your head… You could hear… “Is this seat taken?” The man asked, and you looked up to see Jisung standing next to the chair that was across from you. It was strange, and you looked around at the vast amount of empty tables that filled the large building. Why would he want to sit with you? “I don’t like sitting by myself… I feel like it’s easier to study when I have someone sitting with me.” 
Could he read your mind? Pfft, no! That’s impossible. “It’s not taken…” You mumbled, trying to keep your voice low, hoping that he wouldn’t recognize it from the phone calls. You couldn’t even begin to imagine how furious Jooyi would be if she found out about this. Maybe you should just leave. You could study another night. Then your phone vibrated against the table, your heart froze, and Jisung, who had been smiling at his own phone looked up at you. 
“Heh… That’s a coincidence. I just sent a message and your phone vibrated!” He said rather cheerfully, and the way he looked at you, it was like he was expecting you to check it. There was no way in hell you’d do that though. You awkwardly giggled, shoving your phone into your backpack as you shook your head. 
“Probably an email or something… It is… Ironic though…” You whispered, lowering your head even further into the textbook that you had opened. You felt his eyes linger on you though, like they were burning through you, and you didn’t know whether to feel flustered, nervous, or both those things and everything in between. “D-Do you need something? A pencil… Or-” 
“I know you…” He said matter-of-factly, and it was like your throat closed up and your chest tightened. How did he know you? What was he talking about? He couldn’t possibly know you. “You’re the top student… You’re like, mega smart! I can see why now… Do you always study this late?” 
Relief, a sigh of relief and a deep breath. You were safe… You shouldn’t overthink too much. “Mmn…” You nodded your head once but kept it bowed, trying to focus on the words in the textbook, but it was so hard. “Thank you…” You added, wondering if maybe that was what he was waiting for. 
He chuckled softly, and then you felt the table shake as he dropped his own backpack on the table and started pulling out a bunch of notebooks. “You make it seem so easy. How do you just… Concentrate? It’s so hard for me to do.” He whined, and you looked around as his voice got higher and higher. “Oh… Sorry.” His voice dropped back down to a whisper and then he chuckled softly. 
His laugh was contagious and you couldn’t help but laugh along with him, your hand clasping over your mouth to try to muffle the noise. “It’s easy… You just have to find the fun in it.” He rolled his eyes and stuck his tongue out at you and you pursed your lips, trying not to laugh at his reaction. “Seriously. Here, let me show you.” 
It was supposed to be a solo study session, honestly, it was just to try to get away from your roommate long enough for her to fall asleep. You never in your wildest dreams expected this to happen. It was like a scene straight out of a k-drama, but you also knew that after these types of scenes, things got bad. But you didn’t want to think about that right now… All you could think about was the way that he laughed with you, the way he smiled at you, the way he talked to you like you were a person and not just the dirt beneath his shoes. 
“You remind me of someone.” He said nonchalantly as you both started packing up your books. You blinked a few times, your head tilting to the side as you waited for him to elaborate, but he was looking at his phone, his smile dropping slightly as he turned it off and slid it into his pocket. “Oh… It’s nothing. She must have just fallen asleep. She’s always so tired. She studies a lot… Kind of like you. Maybe you can tutor me… I’ll bring her too! That would be cool, right?” Cool… Not at all. It was the complete opposite of cool. That… That would never work.
“M-Maybe… I don’t know… I tutor a couple other people.” You came up with the lie quickly, and you hated the way his smile almost completely disappeared. Maybe you could make an exception… It’s not like he’d find out… Right? Jooyi would just have to act interested in studying. You were sure that if you told her, she’d be on board… “I’ll… I’ll see if I can schedule you in.” 
And just like that, his smile was back and he was pulling his phone out again. “Awesome! Uhm, how about we exchange phone numbers and…” He trailed off when he saw the look on your face, and you were sure that you looked quite uneasy. There was no way that would go over well with Jooyi, she’d flip shit. “How about Anonny… You know the app, right? Everyone has it!” Oh shit… That was even worse. 
“How about… We leave it up to fate.” His eyebrow arched, and you were really going out on a limb here with the excuses, but you had to protect yourself… Not just from him, but from Jooyi too. You didn’t have much to lose… But it was enough to have you terrified. “If we both manage to come to the library at the same time, if you see me here, I’ll tutor you. I usually come at night though… Just so you know.” 
You bowed your head to him as you got up, putting on your backpack and heading out, and you could hear him following behind you. “I’ll be here. Every night. I’ll study on my own too… Thank you, for helping me.” You hummed in response, pushing open the main door and you were met with a rather brisk gust of wind that had you shivering and shoving your hands into your pockets. “Are you cold? Here…” He shimmied out of his top coat, placing it over your shoulders and smiling when he saw it on you. “You can return it to me next time fate brings us together, okay? Just stay warm, and get home safe.” 
For fucks sake… 
///
JiHizzy : Hey, whatcha up to?
JiHizzy : It’s been like… 3 hours… Are you mad or something? 
JiHizzy : You must be sleeping… I just feel like somethings wrong… 
JiHizzy : Let me know when you get this message… Okay?
Your roommate was fast asleep when you finally got in, and you quickly took off Jisungs coat and slid it under your bed, safe for now at least from the prying eyes of Jooyi. As you curled up under your blankets, ready to just fall asleep, ready to let yourself drift off into a world where you didn’t have to pretend and you didn’t have to lie to the man who had sat across from you in the library when there were so many tables to choose from. The man who smiled at you and made you feel like you were the only person in the room. Then your phone vibrated once more from under your pillow. 
JiHizzy : I was studying tonight… I know how important it is to you and… I wanted to do it. JiHizzy : I met someone there, she reminded me of you a lot! 
JiHizzy : I hope these aren’t waking you up… I know you’re sleeping. 
JustAnotherGirl : I was at the library too. We must have just missed each other…
JiHizzy : NO WAY! Dammit! Well… 
JiHizzy : I was thinking that we can do study dates. Wouldn’t that be cool? 
JustAnotherGirl : It would. I really like that idea. 
JiHizzy : Awesome! Okay! 
JiHizzy : Goodnight cutie! 
Study dates… That’s how you had looked at tonight, or you were just delusional. If tonight had happened sooner… Would you have taken Jooyi up on her deal? He seemed to be just fine with you… He wasn’t embarrassed, he wasn’t ashamed to be sitting across from you and laughing with you… Would he have liked you still if he knew who you really were? 
///
“So, how was your night last night? You got home safe?” Jisung asked and you heard Jooyi giggle loudly, it was so fake, it made you sick. He was such a genuine person, and she was nothing but a stuck up little- 
“My night was wonderful! I went shopping for our date this weekend. I can’t wait for you to see the outfits I picked out!” You sank down onto the bench. Shit… You hadn’t told her… What would happen now? 
“Sh-Shopping?” He questioned, and you wanted to crawl under a rock. You wanted to hide from her and the wrath that you knew was bound to be coming your way. “I thought you were studying? You said… You said you were at the library…” 
She went silent, and even though you were outside, you could feel the tension in the air. “Did… Did I say shopping?! Oh my gosh, I meant studying! I’m a big nerd! You know me!” She laughed again, but this time there was something else… Nervousness? Irritation? Anger? She’d be looking for you. 
“You’re acting weird… Are you okay?” He asked, and she scoffed loudly. Should you spare a glance and risk meeting eyes with her? “Were you just… Lying about studying? Was it to try to… Impress me? You know you don’t have to do that.” 
“I know I don’t. I’m impressive enough!” She said loudly, it’s like she enjoyed making scenes. She was disgusting. “I have to go really quick, I forgot my big ol’ textbook back at my room. I’ll meet up with you later? We can have lunch!” 
“Y-Yeah… Sure…” Something had changed… He wasn’t buying it anymore. But you didn’t have time to worry about that. Jooyi was looking for you, and you were tired of being scared of her. You were tired of worrying about what she’d do or what she’d say about you. Jisung liked you, even if just as a friend… You had been made clear of that last night at the library. She couldn’t even make it one day… The two of you were just too different, and he had noticed. You weren’t sure what would happen next, but you weren’t going to hide away, you weren’t going to give in. You deserved to be happy… You might not have the money, you don’t have the luxuries, but you have the willpower, and you have the drive… And that was worth way more than what her money could ever buy. 
“I need to talk to you… Now.” As if like magic, she appeared in front of you. She was angry, no doubt, but there was nothing she could do to hurt you. So you got up, following her off to the side of one of the buildings, and before you could say anything the palm of her hand connected with your cheek. “You bitch! You said that you’d tell me when he messaged you! Was this your plan?! To humiliate me in front of him!” 
Now it was your turn to scoff, your turn to laugh, and while the sting in your cheek hurt, it didn’t hurt as much as knowing that you almost let him get away, you almost let him get stuck with someone like her. “I didn’t have to plan it for it to work out like this. You humiliated yourself. He isn’t your type… Deal with it.” 
“You…” She started, but it quickly turned to a scream, one filled with pure rage as she started grabbing at the pockets of your jacket. “Give me your phone! He doesn’t want you! He wants me! You’re nothing! You’re poor and you’re pathetic and you’ll never have him! Why would anyone want you!” She just… screamed… She screamed so loud, and with every attempt to grab at you, you swatted her hands away, backing up further and further until you bumped into something… or… someone. “Oh! Jisung!” She full stopped, adjusting her hair and putting on the fakest smile. 
“What are you doing?” He asked, looking between you and Jooyi. “What are you talking about?” His eyes focused on you a lot longer, as if studying you, and you felt the heat of his gaze, but it didn’t burn, it just made you feel warm, it made you feel safe. “Why do you want her phone?” 
Jooyi was stuttering over herself, unable to form a coherent sentence as her head shook violently. “She… Sh-She’s blackmailing me, Ji! She stole my username on Anonny… She’s pretending to be me so that she can get with you… So she can take you away from me!” She whined, and you couldn’t help but look disgustedly at her. She truly was the queen of scenes, stomping her feet and throwing a tantrum like a child would. How pathetic. 
“My… tutor… Is blackmailing… You?” He questioned, and her eyes widened before turning her daggers towards you. “What’s your name on Anonny? If she stole it from you… What is it?” You didn’t have to do anything, he was putting all of the pieces together for himself. You weren’t sure what would happen once the puzzle finally came together… And maybe it wouldn’t work out for you… But to see her get knocked down to size, it made it all worth it. 
“I-It… My Anonny name? You know it! You tell me what it is!” She said, and you knew why, she was trying to get him to say it… But he was smarter than that. He shook his head, letting out a disappointed chuckle, and then his attention was back on you. “Don’t! Don’t look at her! Look at me! You love me!” 
“Do I?” He whispered, but he never looked away from you, his head tilted and a small smile on his face. “What’s your Anonny username?” He asked, and you felt the heat rising inside of you. This was your chance, your moment, you didn’t know where it would lead you to, but it was time. 
“I’m… JustAnotherGirl… Just another girl that has a crush on you… That gets overlooked and forgotten. But I’m here… And I’ve been here for four months…” You murmured, and he let out a shaky gasp. Was he embarrassed? Was he ashamed that you were the girl he had been talking to for so long? “I’m sorry. I’m not popular, I’m not even close to rich. I don’t have much to give… But-” 
“But you’re perfect…” He stepped closer to you, causing you to stumble back as your breath hitched in your throat. “You’re smart, and you’re sweet… You’re kind and you’re genuine. You’re not materialistic, you’re just… You’re wonderful, you’re wonderfully you…” His hand reached up, his knuckles brushing lightly against your cheek. “You’re the girl that I fell in love with…” 
“WHAT!!?” Jooyi screeched from behind you, and before you knew it, you and Jisung were being pushed apart. “Are you serious right now?! Her?! She’s… She’s a roach! She’s vermin! I can’t believe you right now! Have you seen me?!” 
“Sadly.” Jisung retorted, and it took everything in you not to laugh, but everyone that had gathered around to see what was going on laughed enough for you. “I’d really appreciate it if you didn’t talk about my girlfriend like that.” 
“G-Girlfriend?!” Jooyi scoffed, running her hands through her hair. “You’ve got to be kidding me! Just… When you lose all your friends because you’re with a loser, don’t come crawling back to me! Have fun being not popular!” 
“I think it’s time for us to go, don’t you?” He asked, completely ignoring her now as he draped his arm over your shoulder. “You want lunch? Anything you want, it’s on me.” 
///
HanJi : I’ll be at the library soon. I’ve got hot cocoa!
Beautiful Wonderful Girlfriend : Don’t drive too fast, the snow is really coming down now… 
“I know it is…” His voice came from behind you, and then the cups of hot cocoa were placed in front of you on the table. “It’s really pretty, isn’t it?” You glanced out the window, awestruck at just how beautiful campus could look when blanketed in dazzling white snow. “You brought your coat, right?” 
You nodded your head, patting the chair beside you where the coat that he had given you almost 2 years ago was neatly hanging over the back of the seat. “It’s your coat… You just won’t let me give it back.” You teased, and he let out a soft sigh as he dropped down into his seat. He hadn’t changed a bit since the first time you both sat at this table together. 
It was strange how time worked, it felt like forever ago, but you remembered it like it had happened just yesterday. “It’s our coat, babe. What’s mine is yours.” He sounded so serious, but you couldn’t help but laugh at the statement. He was talking like the two of you were… Married? Your laughter subsided as you stared at him across the table, your lips parted slightly as you let out a quiet breath. 
“You’re funny…” You said sheepishly, turning your attention back out the window, focusing on the snowflakes that danced down from the sky, finding the perfect place to rest. “We’re not married, our things don’t have to be shared…” Even though you both had been together for two years and he was the sweetest, most loving boyfriend you had ever had… You still couldn’t get those words out of your head. The words from the past that had been uttered by the girl that had wanted to take your place… He would never want to be with someone like you…
“Yet…” He murmured, the word like a breath leaving his lips. You blinked a few times, feeling the heat rising in your cheeks, your heart thumping loudly in your chest. Did he really love you that much? Could someone really love you that much? Were you deserving of this much love, to be with someone like him? “What are you thinking about, babe?” He cooed, reaching across the table to grab your hands that were folded on top, his thumb brushing lightly across your knuckles. 
“I’m just…” You began, feeling the familiar sting of fresh tears beginning to brim in your eyes, but it was slightly different this time… They weren’t tears of sadness or fear… You were happy. “I’m so lucky… And… I never thought I’d be with someone so amazing… So perfect…” You could barely get your voice above a whisper, your throat closing up from trying to hold back your tears. 
“Mm…” He hummed, pushing away from the table and getting up, walking around to your side of the table and grabbing your hand. “Let’s take a walk… yeah?” One more glance out the window and you saw the snow creating almost a wall of white as it came down harder, but there was no wind, it was just… beautiful. “I’ll keep you warm, don’t worry.” 
You nodded your head, grabbing the coat and slipping it on, the scent of his cologne, although faded, still brought you comfort when you put it on. “Where are we going?” You quizzed, slipping your fingers between his as you both walked out of the library. You were sure that nothing would be open, not with this weather. 
“Anywhere… I just… I want to walk with you.” He said, his voice kind of shaky, like his nerves had gotten the better of him. He led you aimlessly through campus, and you followed right along beside him. You didn’t really care where you were going, as long as you were with him, you’d follow the path he was taking blindly with your hand in his. “I’ve been thinking a lot about how I’ll do it…” 
Was he talking to you or was he just thinking out loud? You looked to him, the snowflakes catching on your eyelashes as you tried to read him, but he was looking straight forward, his lips turned up into a lopsided smile. “How you’ll do what?” Even though you were speaking softly, the silence that surrounded you made every word sound so loud. 
“Propose.” He sounded so calm, but the singular word alone had you pausing, pulling him back so he would face you. “What? Can I not think about how I’m going to propose to my wonderful, beautiful, amazing, sweet, lovely-“ 
“Okay okay!” Even after 2 years, you still weren’t the best at taking compliments, especially when he was looking at you so intently. “Why are you thinking about that right now? We’re still in college and… I want you to focus on graduating. So we can both be successful. You know?” 
His hand slipped out of yours and then his arm snaked around your waist as he started walking again, pulling you along with him. “I can focus on graduating, and I can focus on you. I’ve been doing it since the day I truly met you… the real you.” He chuckled quietly, the sound building in his chest as his head shook. It was funny now, to look back on everything that happened. “And I like thinking about the future, it makes me happy to know that I’ll be spending it with you. But you don’t have to worry about me proposing in college… I wouldn’t want everyone to see. I want it to be a moment for us to remember.” You hummed softly, leaning against his shoulder as you simply listened to him, you let him get lost in his thoughts because you didn’t mind getting lost in them either. They had you looking forward to a better, simpler time where the two of you would be able to be together without worrying about grades and finals. “Flower petals will line the path that I’ll take you down…” He murmured, and your eyes were focused on his face, not noticing the trail of pink and red in the snow. “A gazebo, with fairy lights twinkling brightly, shining in your eyes…” He continued, sighing softly. “Nobody is around, the snow is falling, you look absolutely stunning against the backdrop…” 
“A winter proposal?” You asked, and you were so lost in his thoughts and your own that you hadn’t even noticed how far you had walked until he was leading you up the stairs of a white wooden gazebo, perfect icicles hanging off the roof of it, and… fairy lights illuminated the inside. “Ji…” You whispered his name, a tuft of smoke coming from your mouth as you breathed it out. His arm left your waist and he kneeled down in front of you, his cheeks a dark pink from both the cold and his nerves. “You said… You said you wouldn’t propose when we were still in college…” 
He snickered, fishing a black velvet box out of his pocket, his snow dampened hair curtaining his eyes as he kept his head down. “I meant… not while we were in the college. We’re not on the grounds anymore…” He finally looked up at you, and you let out a shaky gasp as it truly set in what he was doing. “I don’t want to wait any longer, I know that you’re the one that I want to spend all of my life with. I’ve never felt more comfortable with anyone else. I love you, I’ve known that I loved you since before I even… before I even knew you. I wake up every morning and thank everything that you’re mine, and I fall asleep every night knowing that no matter what, everything will be okay because I have you by my side. I don’t care what anyone thinks, I don’t care what people might say… I only care that you’re happy… And if you say yes, I promise… To do my best to make you feel happy and loved every single day until the day that I die.” He opened the box, and the diamond facets of the silver ring glistened and reflected the lights that had been strung up. “So… Will you… Will you marry me?” 
You choked out a sob, dropping to your knees in front of him as you nodded your head yes, and he quickly pulled the ring out of the box, his hand shaking as he slid it onto your finger. “Ji…” Was all you could say as you looked at the ring, cold, yet so beautiful in its place. His chilled hands cupped your cheeks, tilting your head so that your eyes would meet his. “I love you…” 
“And I’ll always love you.” He leaned in, kissing you softly and humming against your lips. “Shall we go back inside and warm up, my beautiful, lovely, wonderful, amazing-“ 
“Stop~” You playfully whined, giggling quietly as you dropped your gaze once more. “You’re so cheesy…” You mumbled, and then you felt his lips against your forehead, his fingers brushing your hair out of your face. 
“And you’re… You’re everything to me…” He pushed himself up to his feet, carefully pulling you up and then hugging you tightly. “Thank you, for making me happy, for loving me… I can’t wait to marry you."
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azzifuddworlddomination · 9 months ago
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casual pt. 1
okay yall i've never written fan fiction before, but i saw one too many pazzi edits to casual and i couldn't help myself but write something. not proofread lol
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“I’ll be ready in a second, I swear,” Azzi calls over to Colleen, who has been sitting on Azzi’s bed as Azzi gets ready. They were supposed to be at Ted’s an hour ago, where the rest of the team is celebrating first night. 
Colleen watches as Azzi paws through all of the drawers in her dresser. Unsatisfied, Azzi begins to dig through the pile of laundry that was building on her floor. “What are you even looking for?” Colleen asks. “My good bra,” Azzi replies, “I can’t find it anywhere. Unless I left it at…” Azzi trails off. “Don’t even finish that sentence,” Colleen advises. “You aren’t still seeing her are you? She’s making you look like a loser, while she goes and does whatever the hell she wants, while you just wait for her to be “ready,”” Colleen wraps air quotes around her last word. 
Azzi knew Colleen was right. Azzi turns around and slips her shirt off, before putting on a different bra, and a purple tank top. She turns back around towards Colleen, “let’s just go,” Azzi says. “Come on Az, I feel like you aren’t really hearing me…” Colleen says as she follows Azzi out of the dorm. “I just don’t want you to waste your time on her. You’ve been here for like three months and she’s just made you miserable this whole time,” Colleen finishes. “I know Colleen, but can we please just not talk about this tonight? I actually want to try to have a good time tonight,” Azzi replies. “Fine,” Colleen responds, knowing that Azzi’s will most likely end in a bathroom, crying over Paige.
Ted’s is packed tonight. Both the men’s and women’s teams had gone out to celebrate, as well as what seems like every other student at UConn. Azzi looked through the crowds before finding the women’s team surrounding the counter and taking shots. “Finally you’re here!” Nika calls out to the girls as they make their way over. Nika hands Azzi a shot, “You gotta catch up,” she reasons. Azzi downs the shot. Nika hands her a chaser which Azzi happily accepts. Nika hands Azzi a drink and pats her hand before going back to Dorka. Amari comes over and drunkenly envelopes Azzi in a hug. Amari tries to catch Azzi up on all that she missed while she was still back at the dorms getting ready. Azzi peers around the crowd as she notices that Paige isn’t with the rest of the team. As Azzi looks deeper into the crowd she finds Paige talking to a few guys from the men’s team. Azzi gently touches Amari’s arm “Wow, Amari, I feel like I was there,” she laughs before she leaves to go make her way through the crowd to Paige. 
“You and Fudd?” one of the guys asks as he playfully shakes Paige’s shoulder. “No, no its not like that,” Paige responds, “We’re not together. It’s just a casual thing right now.” 
Azzi steps back accidentally stepping on the person behind her. “Watch it,” the girl calls out. Azzi turns around and makes her way towards the door. As she reaches the doorway to the alley, she can’t hold it in anymore. She throws up all over the steps of the backdoor.
Azzi carefully walks down the steps, avoiding her own vomit. She makes it onto the ground, and slides her back against the wall. Normally Azzi would be cold in the November weather in just a tank top and jeans, but tonight she was burning. Casual?? She thinks to herself. We’re just casual??
The entire time that they have known each other, Paige and Azzi have been anything but casual. From flying to each other’s basketball games to going on vacation together to Paige moving in with Azzi during covid; they have never just been casual. 
When Paige had gone off to college, she and Azzi had agreed that they would wait to be exclusive until Azzi started school. Paige enjoyed playing into the hot shot basketball star persona that she had at UConn her freshman year, but she would still make time for her nightly facetimes with Azzi, even if she had to leave a different girl’s dorm to do so.
Azzi’s been at school for three months, and it seems like Paige has made no effort to become exclusive. Azzi didn’t want to pressure her into anything. She would just wait until Paige was ready. Azzi tried to be with other people, but at the end of the day they weren’t Paige and she could never do it. 
The door opens, breaking Azzi out of her train of thought. Azzi turns her head to look at the door, as she sees a blonde figure walking down the steps. “Az, Aaliyah said she thought you come out here. What are you doing?” Paige asks. “I just came out here to get some air,” Azzi responds. Paige reaches out her hand and pulls Azzi up from the ground, bringing her into a kiss. For a split second, Azzi kisses her back, before she breaks off the kiss. She rests her head on Paige’s shoulder. Azzi’s mad, and Azzi knows that she’s mad, but Azzi also knows that all she wants to do right now is be with Paige. She’s mad, and she’s conflicted, which makes her even more mad. “Let’s go back in Az, it’s cold as shit out here,” Paige says. 
Azzi follows Paige back in, but stops at the bar as Paige keeps walking. Azzi orders two drinks before retiring to a corner in the back of the bar. Casual??? Azzi thinks. She says we’re casual and yet she’s the only one who came looking for me??? And she kissed me??? What the fuck??? 
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ashtxrie · 1 month ago
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we stay locked in
— alternatively, enhypen as (my) high school classes!
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PAIR. high school! enhypen x gn!reader (rest under cut) GENRE. humor, high school au, blurbs WORD COUNT. 1.3k total NOTES. hello enhablr i am BACK. sorry guys this is alternatively known as a super self-indulgent enhypen as my classes this year so i don’t crash out in semester 2 post
이희승 — lee heeseung
philharmonic orchestra. he’s there for the vibes (and to fulfill his performing arts graduation credit requirement) but he’s secretly super invested in music theory. the type to say “i didn’t practice at all lol” the day of the audition but still eat that shi up anyway?? people tell him to stop the cap but honestly, he has the raw talent to pull it off as well so nobody really knows. he WILL be that person clocking people who use the restroom for the nth time in the middle of the firebird suite though, but man, sometimes people really do need that bathroom break for their mental and physical wellbeing. as his stand partner, he’s really good at covering for you if you make a mistake and even takes mutual blame for coming in early even though it was definitely your fault for taking a nap during your 5-measure rest... he’s that one student who gets to conduct the orchestra when the conductor is absent (or “sick” on a vacation to disney world) and the ensemble actually respects him enough to take him seriously.
박종성 — park jongseong
ap us history. we all know this man loves history; he would actually be the type to read the textbook for fun and not just search up summary pdfs or upload the whole dang thing to chat gpt! i feel like quizlet would be his best friend and would probably terrorize all his other friends to build their quizlet flashcard streaks with him. lowk he’s just in this class so he can flex random history facts on uninformed people I’M SORRY he secretly enjoys somewhat resembling the “umm actually!” meme. but honestly you go jay, being educated IS rightfully a flex. i feel like he’d actually talk to the teacher after class just to ask a clarifying question or just to confirm something totally random; he’d be like “was there really a u.s. entomological warfare field test called operation big itch?!” and the teacher would absolutely love him for that. on practice dbq days, he’s the best person to have on your team — you know you’re set when he gives you the look and little nod that communicates that he 100% got this. 
심재윤 — sim jaeyun
ap calculus bc... THIS MAN WILL GLAZE THE HELL OUT OF AP CALCULUS BC. just like how he is adamant about his physics glazing, math is no exception. tell me why he’s legitimately taking advantage of ten minutes at the end of class to get started on his homework? put that TI-84 AWAY and look me in the eyes. he’s the one classmate who’s super nonchalant and sporty and sits in the back of the classroom, but is secretly an academic weapon. “jake sim, wonderful work. you were the only one in the class who got 100.” HELLO??? good thing you always go over to him for a post-exam debrief, because he’s basically the answer key anyway. during class, he’d be quietly doing his own thing and joking around with the people around him, but the teacher lets it slide. everyone in the class is conflicted between loving and hating him, but he’s genuinely so nice and is always eager to help the people around him who need it — that still doesn’t stop the entire class from naming him their D1 opp though! 
박성훈 — park sunghoon
ap biology. the one who spites people who obliterate the curve. he’s also the best frq peer-grader though, he’s going off of vibes! if you mention anything remotely close to the answer key, you bet he’s giving you the point because people suffer enough already. sunghoon is surprisingly good at the labs though, he managed to not kill a single fly in the mendelian genetics lab and he’s super diligent at counting them too. your other lab mates had exhaled a bit too harshly one time and the sedated flies went FLYING across the lab table from under the microscope — you swear sunghoon’s eye twitched because he had JUST sorted them all by phenotype. he didn’t say anything to them though, and just started recounting the flies again because he’s just a chill guy like that. what people don’t know about him is that he actually scores high enough to potentially set the curve, he just chooses not to raise his hand when the teacher asks for top scores because he’s #taking one for the team. what a legend. 
김선우 — kim sunoo
advanced journalism. producing a newspaper? more like an excuse to know ALL the gossip and put everything under the name of investigative journalism. it’s literally his JOB to be on top of all the school events and the niche hobbies and passions that students have, and he absolutely loves it. combined with his social personality and strong writing, he’s for sure the editor of the “spotlight” category. and honestly, he’s the best the school has had in a long time. his feedback is always something to look forward to too — as one of his staff writers, your drafts are handed back with a colored pen circling a particular phrase you used, with the words “someone cooked here” or “OH YES GIRL” written in the margins. he brings the best food for after-school mandatory work days too, from donuts to chips to canned drinks — sunoo knows that the people need the snacks in order to gain enlightenment mid-article! his pages in the newspaper are also the most visually appealing too, this man knows how to use adobe indesign. 
양정원 — yang jungwon
ap english language and composition. with how diligently he uses duolingo, i have no doubts that jungwon will succeed in ap lang. imagine if he applies that study technique to memorizing rhetorical devices? he would be reading something completely random like the instagram terms of service and going “omg wait guys this is anaphora” like okay english king. and the effort he puts in shows in his results too. when jungwon checked his grades to see a 100% on the timed write while every one of his friends complained for a whole week about getting an 80, he knew he was locked IN. he participates a lot during class discussions too, so everyone knows who he is. as a fellow #taking one for the team legend, he always agrees to be the sacrifice to share out to the class the table group’s ideas. also — something not exactly english-focused, but he’s also so alarmingly good at time management. like how is he maintaining a solid sleep schedule and clear skin while watching alchemy of souls during his pomodoro breaks? the world will never know. 
西村力 — nishimura riki
ap chemistry. hear me out he signed up for this class thinking he could blow stuff up. he did not, in fact, get to blow stuff up all year — the blowing was done instead in the form of a huge blow to this man’s gpa. like what do you mean there’s solubility rules, polyatomic ions, vsepr geometric structures and their BOND ANGLES, plus gas law equations to memorize?! he went slightly delirious mid-semester and came up with insane, unhinged references just to drill all the content into his memory, from connecting acetate (CH3CO2-) to his “esteemed rizz mentor” heeseung (3 letter e’s in his name and he breathes out CO2!) and imagining his friends on a fucking seesaw to memorize the <90 and <120 degree bond angles. he tried explaining his logic to you (rapping out the equation for the van der waals real gas law?) and you just went along with it. he actually pulled through though with a B+ at the end of it all, but he swears to never have jake in charge of his course selection ever again. 
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TAGLIST: @star-sim @boyfiejay @jlheon @jwsdoll @dimplewonie @suneng @en-gelic @mygnolia
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jaylleoo14 · 1 year ago
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"Can I kiss you?"
Octavinelle x gn!reader
A/N: Simple. The sea trio has corrupted my mind and so here I am writing this at 1:03 AM and finishing this up two days later LOL. I actually took forever because I kept squealing and getting off track during the writing process. "I NEED TO DRAW THIS" I would say to myself haha. I wrote them without much consideration on how long each might be so one of them may be shorter compare to the others or it may be longer, but please do enjoy^^ (May or may not do the other dorms, unless...)
[Disclaimer] TOO MUCH FLUFF
[characters] Floyd, Azul, Jade
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Azul
3:24 PM - The Mostro Lounge sits under blue and silver burnished lighting as the sound of music fills the air. Accompanied by voices and the clinks of dishes, there you sat in the more private area of what adds to Octavinelle - Azuls office.
Something you both have learned to get accustomed to was to just do work alongside each other without the need of having to talk. It was just work. Nothing more. Of course some small talk here and there, asking opinions or maybe asking for help- though it was usually you who asked for it and less of Azul- but regardless it was back off to work. It's quite simple really, Azul is a busy and hard working person so he'd naturally have a lot to manage with. You had to keep up with your studies and try to manage how to handle your money and savings accordingly, along with planning events into your calendar for upcoming school occasions.
You and Azul have been dating for about half a year now, and although not all the time, most of the time you spend your free time here doing your work accompanying Azul as he does his. You both simply enjoy each other's presence, the silence between you two which is filled with the scritches and scratches of his fish-bone felt tip pen and your pencil against the many pages of papers were not at all awkward. It showed a sense of comfortability and familiarity, a tranquil silence in the room. Though of course, like almost any couple you begin to crave some attention from your dearly beloved.
3:27 PM - Placing your pencil down, it now rolling off to the side a little due to the momentum, you lean back onto the back cushions of Azuls couch placed in the middle of his office. Working for about 15 minutes now you decided you needed a break, stretching your arms back as you release your breath through your nostrils.
"Going to take a break Angelfish?" Without even having to look up, the sound of you leaning into his leather cushion and your stretched out groan already tells him enough information that you're ready to just try and relax and rejuvenate yourself.
"Mmmh yea, I think 15 minutes of work is good enough for now. I'll go back to it once I rest up," is all you say in response as you lean your body over to lay on the couch. He only lets out a hum to let you acknowledge that he was listening. Now that you weren't focused on your own work, you can hear him writing with a rich shink-like noise and papers constantly flipped and turned every 30 seconds.
I wonder what he's working on, you think to yourself as you stare up at the dark blue arched ceiling. You prop yourself up with your elbows, pushing yourself up as you move your legs off the couch. Springing off, you head on over to where Azul was working around behind the desk and peered over towards him. "Whatcha working on?" Voice soft and curious, an undertone of boredom.
"Just some useful material intended to aid students," he says in a gentle manner, his eyes still glued onto the papers. "Oh yea? How much longer till you finish up with those study guides?" You lean over a bit closer as you stand next to him, his handwriting as intricate and beautifully cursive as ever; yet still eligible for those who have a harder time understanding.
He lets out a little inquisitive hum as if trying to accurately calculate when he'd be finished by. "About in an hour or so," he says finally after seconds worth of time. "I'd say make that an hour-thirty to two from now" you say with a little soft laugh escaping your lips.
3:30 - Standing next to Azul as he preps material, you slowly come to look at Azul himself instead of what Azul was working on. Being able to see the sight of his silver crowned locks of hair that curls into beautiful waves. Only after making your comment does he stop his hand and turn to look up at you from where he sat.
After finally not being able to properly see Azul's face the entire time you were working, seeing his face was a sort of refreshment to your heart and the soft smile on your face shows that. "And what prompts you to assume such a thing my dear?" He can only be met with a giggly response, his serious and quizzical face only prompting you to let out more chains of giggles.
"Tell me what you are suddenly finding so funny? I certainly am positive that I haven't done anything humorous." You tilt your head a little to the side, your grin getting slowly bigger as you clasped your hands behind your back. Azul can already pick up that you're trying to whip something up.
"You know Azul, when was the last time you kissed me?"
And there he goes, short circuiting as the sudden change of mood drifts him like the ocean currents. "I-Is this what you're on about?" He certainly has picked up by what you meant with your earlier comment now that you've voiced your question. "Oh dear, do you perhaps feel neglected since i've been working so much Angelfish?"
"Don't try to act smug. Answer my question, when was the last time you kissed me?" You immediately shoot down his question as you direct it back to yours and it sends his cheeks a pigmented red while he tries to keep his cool. He understands that you wont stop asking him this question and so he answers away.
"I recall it to be a few weeks back."
"And where did you kiss me?"
"I-I don't see how that- hah, on the cheek. Seriously (y/n) what is the relevancy in asking such- "
"Ah! Hold it! So you're telling me you've been giving me kisses and I've been giving you kisses but we've never actually kissed at the same time?"
3:33 - Here you are facing Azul as you look at his tinted red face, picking up where your suggestion leads. What awaits is permission to boldly take your relationship to the next level.
"Can I kiss you Azul? And not on the hands or on the cheek like we usually do." You give him a soft pleading look, your cheeks also decorated in a lovely shade of red as you wait for his response patiently. Clearing his throat and having the need to suddenly fix his not crooked glasses, he gives you a very shy yet still doing his best to be serious look. Before answering, he quickly resolves himself and a more confident smirk is plastered on his face. As he pushes himself up from his chair he closes in the distance and comes in close towards you, wrapping an arm around your back.
"Ask and you shall receive, a small kiss is worth the price of my time for you my Angelfish," he says it ever so calmly and confidently. Though the redness of his cheeks give away that he was otherwise and it makes your heart squeeze and beat crazy because of how cute he was being right now.
"You're being so cute right now you know that? You don't have to force yourself, you know." Your voice is gentle and smooth as if it were raw honey. Bringing a hand to tuck the longer piece of hair that made up his hairstyle, you give him the most adored stricken smile ever and he can only feel his heart beating out of his chest.
"No no, it's about time we started to get more intimate considering how long we've been together now. Thank you for going at my preferred pace, I'd like to give you an honorarium payment." You let out an amused chuckle and let him prepare himself, closing your eyes as you wait for him to go in at his own pace. Though you least expect it when he suddenly goes in very quickly. His lips are stiffly pressed against yours for a couple of seconds and it has you opening your eyes in surprise. You're met with a red faced Azul -which can be compared to a steamed and cooked octopus- looking flustered and a little awkward as he seemed to have a little dissatisfactory expression on his face. "That... Did not go as well as I had hoped it to be."
A jovial and convivial laughter fills up the room in your sound and it only makes Azul shrivel in embarrassment. You can practically see the steam coming from his head as well. "Well that was a little anticlimactic don't you think?" Wrapping your arms around his neck he can only let out an embarrassed groan at your little comment. "What do you expect from someone who's inexperienced with committing such an act? I'm positive however that with enough practice I can redeem myself and satisfy you." He tries to sound all the more reasoning, which only prompts you to laugh even more.
"You want to kiss more?" Saying through slips of giggles. You feel his hold on your back tighten a bit more, still applying gentle and reaffirming pressure as he presses you both together. "How else do you suggest I be better then?" You turn and motion your body over to the desk, leaning your lower back against it as Azul follows along. "Hmm, I'm absolutely positive that it'll take you two hours to finish those study guides now." You pull a little amused laugh out of him as he slowly goes in once again, tilting his head to the side and his eyes looking to align with yours. "Mmm perhaps. I guess we'll have to see just how long it'll take for me to get better then." And in he goes, the kiss feeling much more natural and a mark of showing a deeper significance in your ongoing relationship.
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Jade
The nights on campus here were unusually less disturbed and a lot colder now, which makes sense considering that it is now winter break. The students here at Night Raven College had all gone home to reunite with their families after departing to pursue and complete their highschool education. However a certain group of individuals tend to stay during this time period, and that being the dorm leader of Octavinelle, the vice dorm leader, and the vice dorm leader's twin brother.
Like a lot of teenagers, its normal to come across at least 10 students at night since many are nocturnal people and they share the hobby of walking around. Especially when the sky is dark. You are one of those people. Someone who indulges themselves into the canvas of black paint littered with shining splatter of stars. Regardless of what the weather is like, you willingly go out of your way to enjoy the peacefulness of the night, watching it as it goes through the different seasons. Walking around in the winter's night air you can see your breath whenever you huff out, a shiver going through your shoulders. A little reminder that its the cold season now.
The chilly weather seems to be getting to you so you turn back from where you presently are and walk back to your good ol' home, Ramshackle dorm. As you make your way back from the main road you can make out a tall dark figure up ahead, prompting you to slow down and start to get wary. Upon getting closer and squinting your eyes a little, you can see teal hair shining a bit under the orange light which was radiating off a nearby light pole. Oh, it's Jade! You remember Jade mentioning that he liked to also go out late at night, though this is your first time ever encountering him on your usual walks. Perhaps he too is taking advantage of the quieter nights.
You and Jade have been a little on and off. You cant quite describe it, its complicated really. Sometimes you feel like you cant understand Jade because he's always making things open-ended, leaving them up to your interpretations. You like him, that much is obvious. But there are plenty of times where he's shown interest in you, and other times where it may not feel as so and it throws you off. Its frustrating not knowing how he feels about you, as if its some sort of game you two play. Regardless of his little plays though, you continue to enjoy yourself in the game.
A slight breeze hits your figure and it causes you to shiver, rubbing your arms to enforce friction in hopes of warming you up. You figured it may be best to leave Jade alone so he can enjoy himself in peace doing whatever he was doing. And off you go, turning on your heel and continuing your venture.
The sky is so pretty, you think to yourself. It has you arching your neck up and leaning your head back as you stare at the night sky, continuing your walk. You cant help but look at how pretty the stars are knitted together in a beautiful cluster, zoning out a bit as you continue forward.
Suddenly a hand is placed on your shoulder and it causes you to jolt up like a scared cat, making you break out of your trance. A yell is ushered out of you as you quickly turn around to see who this person could be, and you're only met facing Jade.
"Oh dear, I do apologize for my sudden notice. But your voice sounds lovely even when out of fear fufu"
Your heart is still pounding and your eyes are opened widely, staring at him with disbelief and shock. "J-Jade! What are you doing?! God you freaking scared me oh my gosh." Your little scared moment certainly has him entertained as he lets out another chuckle.
"You seem to be so infatuated with the sky that you failed to notice your surroundings. I was only doing my part in trying to help you realize that."
"What do you me-?" As you turn around your quickly met with a lamp pole right in front of your face and it causes you to flinch back a bit. "Oh." Turning around to face him again you feel yourself feeling a bit embarrassed that he caught you about to do something embarrassing. "Thanks Jade... What are you doing out so late?"
"I could ask you the same thing. I was just taking advantage of the quiet night and looking at the nature of the trees." He looks over you, a genuine smile on his face plastered as what you can assume to be looking at the area around us. "However I stayed aware of my surroundings despite having my own infatuations." His little snarky yet calm remark causes you to let out a groan, a pout slightly forming on your lips.
"I was also taking advantage of tonight as well thank you very much." Straightening your back, you cross your arms and give him a slight frown as if trying to regain back your little pride. Then quite suddenly a gust of wind howls a bit in your direction, causing you to shiver and quiver a bit. "Tonight is quite cold I must say." His slight remark makes you shiver even more as you are reminded of the cold.
"Yea, no kidding. I didn't prepare well enough so I'm going to head back." Your face is cold to the touch and your nose and cheeks can be seen slightly red under the pale moonlight. "Oh I see, perhaps I can accompany you then." He offers yet you turn him down in a polite manner. Your reasons? It's obvious you like Jade. You really like him, though because of all these mixed signals you can't help but feel like you need to stop. It already frustrates you enough and so you need to let these feelings die down even though sometimes you really do get a kick from the things he does.
"You seem to be quite cold indeed (y/n), if I can't accompany you back then please allow me to warm you up for your trip."
His words seem to catch you off guard and you look up at him quizzically. He doesn't seem to be wearing any sort of jacket, how can he offer you warmth? He chuckles a bit, amused to see your confused scrunched face. Gently bringing a hand to your cheeks your eyes can't seem to help but widen in shock a little from the sudden gentle advancement, your brain going blank.
"Can I kiss you, Prefect?" He says it ever so softly, his voice wrapping you up like a soft blanket. Did Jade really just ask to kiss you? What's going on, is this even real right now? Are you dreaming? Is this another one of his games? You feel your face starting to heat up and your heart is starting to race.
"W-Wait, what? Did I hear that right?" You say in disbelief, but he knows you heard it correctly because of your red face. His hands cupping your face causes you to freeze in the moment and all you can hear is the loud drums of your heart. Leaning down a bit more you can see his eyes perfectly now, his heterochromia jewel like eyes shimmering. "I must admit i'm a little hurt to see you trying to avoid me recently Prefect. I apologize for beating around the bush for so long, I hope you can take this kiss as a form of acceptance for my feelings and my apology."
This eel.... THIS EEL! He knows what he's doing, he knows! You're left stammering a bit before you could answer, the feeling of your head spinning. "I...accept your apology." And with that he goes down in one smooth motion, his lips in contact with yours with a perfect fit. Once he leans back, your eyes are met and he lets out a content hum. "I'm glad to see you're quite warmed up now. And if I must add, happier too." A big goofy smile is placed on your face as if you just won the lottery, your face all red and heated. "You know, I actually wouldn't mind if you were to accompany me back now. Who knows what might be out here."
You seem to be in a giddy mood, no longer holding back. Finally, you can understand Jade's true feelings for you now. It makes you overjoyed, a feeling of happiness now that you understand. And with a smile on his face he agrees, playing along with your little game of words. The feeling of warmth and fluffy happiness fills you up, and the cold cant compare with that as you make your way back with Jade, his little darling Pearl.
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Floyd
"WHAT THE HELL FLOYD?!"
Crash!
Ah yes, just another regular day. You, Floyd, your phone in his hand, breathless, a cheeky and amused grin on his face, and just constantly trying to snag your phone back in the spacious long hallway. Call this a regular day occurrence considering how many times he's come to bother and mess with you now.
"Floyd, give me back my pho- STOP SCROLLING THROUGH MY CAMERA ROLL!" Running up and trying to snatch it away by jumping, only to fail because he's now outstretching his arms away and tip-toeing to refrain from you reclaiming back your item.
"Haaah? Your camera roll is so boring, just full of pictures of the sky. We see that everyday, you should take more pictures of other interesting things!" You really were running out of breath here and he seems to take great amusement with it since he's still here messing with you.
The sun shined brightly against the two of you, the open wall of the hall letting the air roam freely.
"Ahaha! What a funny picture of Crabby-chan! Oh, and you got one of little Mackerel too." Floyds not listening to your words, enjoying himself as he indulges in your camera roll. You let out a tired and heavy sigh, heaving a bit as you try to catch your breath. "F-Floyd, why are you doing this? Argh, I swear you've been bothering me so much lately." He only give you a little "hm?" in response as his smile now fades, turning to something more neutral and casual as he continues to indulge himself in your selective memories.
"Ya have soooo many pictures of other people lil' shrimpy. Ah! You even have a picture of Jade and Azul! No fairrrr!" Letting out a whine, you can see his prominent pout as he pinches his fingers on your screen to zoom in on you which was in between Azul and Jade. His eyes stick to the screen as he stares at the picture of your sweet smile looking as if you just finished some heavy and tiring labor just before.
"That was when we went camping during Vargas's stupid camping trip. Of course you weren't there!" You huffed out as you wipe a sweat off your neck, placing your free arm on your hip while you just watch him on your phone. At this point you just gave up and let him do what he wanted on there, of course as long as he's in the camera roll and nowhere else.
"But i'm here now aren't I? And you were even there when I went camping, jus excuses." His slightly upset voice makes you feel a bit guilty yourself, but you try to find a way to dispute his words anyways.
"Not true! If you keep scrolling more you'll see yourself in one of the pictures I took with Ace!" A huff escapes your mouth as you try to stay strong on your claim and he only lets out a disappointed groan. "I'm in the background Shrimpy, and you cant even see my face properly. Ya dont wanna have people mixin' me with my brother now dontcha?" His eyes look over towards you now as he drapes his arm down, just very offended with the lack of pictures you have available of him.
"It's not like i'm gonna show anyone Floyd. No one's gonna know its you except for me." You try to reassure him but he still isn't satisfied at all with your response. The sun shines in as its rays changes its direction and hits Floyd in the eyes, causing his already sour mood to worsen and he lets out an annoyed huff. The shadow of the pillars drapes over you like a veil and the sun hits him like a beam, so he then places his hand over his forehead to block the sun out while walking closer to you in venture for refuge. The light reflects into the phone causing a gleam hitting your own eyes and so you step back, squinting your eyes away. For a moment you actually forgot he had your phone if not for the reminder the gleam gave you.
"Floyd, could you please hand me back my phone now?" You say in a more gentle voice in consideration to his sour mood. His droopy eyes meet yours as a slight pout forms on his face which then looks over at your phone in his hand. Suddenly, his pouty face lifts up into a gleeful smile, his toothy lop-sided smirk giving you unease as if he's planning something not so great.
"Ya know, why not jus' take some pics right now? Say cheese~!" Suddenly, with his longer legs he quickly makes his way over next to you, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and pulling close.
"Wha-? Hey-!" Before you could even ready yourself though, he brings the phone above you two, angling the camera as he tilts his head against yours and maneuvers his thumb over the camera shutter button, pulling your bodies together.
Click! Click! Click!
"Hey stop taking so much! You're going to take up my storage!" Quickly swiping up your phone you press on the little square in the corner to open up the pictures. His arm continues to drape on your shoulder as he looks over at the pictures with a happy hum. Floyd looked as photogenic as ever when he wants to be, his silky skin reflecting in the pictures as his smile radiates and shine while his cheeks being a dusty pink. You on the other hand....Not so much. You were even blinking in one of them, most of the pictures of you looking off and funny.
"I wasn't ready Floyd." A stern look is scrunched on your face as you swipe and look at the pictures with a judgmental stare. A giggle can be heard right next to you as Floyd also looks over you in the pictures, a tinted pink running on his cheeks and a soft look in his eyes; his heart speeding up just slightly as he continues the close and intimate proximity.
"I think you look cute anyways." He says it ever so casually and in a gentle voice, causing you to look over at him. Upon turning your head to face him, its only then did you realize just how close he was. How intimate you two were being right now. His side profile looking perfect as ever, his olive colored eye locked on the screen staring only at you, his arm draped over your shoulders, your bodies practically meshing together right now as his pecks touch your back. You feel your cheeks starting to heat up, your heart begins to speed up as if you are starting a morning run the more you begin to get conscious. His eyes suddenly dart to look at you and you flinch back, jumping a little due to being startled; however his arm keeps you in place from moving any further.
"Seriously, you've been messing with me too much..." You grumbled out as you turn your face back to look at the now black screen. It shut off due to the lack of inactivity, and in the reflection you can see your furrowed brows and tightlipped frown. Though from the side Floyd can only give a bigger grin upon seeing your velvet cheeks.
"Cus' I like ya, aint it obvious?" The speed to which you flip your head can be compared to one of a bullet train and your jaw drops, mouth wide open and agape as you're left with no words. "HUH?!" Your whole face is now a full on red, your eyes filled with shock as if he just dropped the most jaw dropping information ever. Well, technically he did.
Tilting his head to the side a little, his face also grows a darker shade of red, though he lets out a giddy chain of giggles to your reaction. "Eh? You're quite bold Shrimpy, movin' kinda fast there huh?"
"W-What?" He can practically see question marks floating around your red beet face, his toothy smug face still apparent as he wraps another arm in front of you. He's basically giving you a side hug right now -a sweet and tender one.
"Hehe, nothin,'" smiling as if its something only he knows makes you a bit bothered and curious, but then he suddenly swings himself in front of you now. The sun hits the back of Floyd, making him radiate ever so brightly. "How bout' we start off a bit slower hmm? Whats it to ya Shrimpy, do ya like me back?" His soft and droopy slanted eyes adoringly stare into yours and you cant help but feel your heart turn into a big wet sopping pillow. Adverting your eyes down, you can only give a little nod. "Well i mean, I don't hate you. So yea, I.... I do in fact, Like you too."
Honestly, Floyds been nothing but smiles now and its as if he found the most pretty set of flowers ever on a grassy field. "Is that so? Ya really like me huh?"
My hearts beating so fast right now.
"Yea, I really like you."
"Shall I give you a kiss then Shrimpy?"
Tilting your head back up at him you can only give him a shy and flustered face. But with the silly state you're in right now, you let out a slip of a tongue response.
"C-Can I kiss you?" Totally unexpected to Floyd, his eyes widen for only a moment till he's flinging his head back with laughter and squeezing you into his chest.
"Hahaha! Will you kiss me?" Calming himself down a bit he looks back at you with you in his arms now, the suns rays slowly shifting over.
"Will I kiss you?" saying almost in a smug manner now, feeling yourself succumbing into his giggly state of self as you yourself now start to get giddy with your red cheeks.
"You will" He says it with a reciprocal teasing tone as he leans forward, the comfort in his lean arms making you feel as if you've been lovers forever.
"I will?"
"I will" And with that he softly goes in to press a kiss on your lips, the sun shining and hitting the both of you and its as if you two were getting the spotlight of a movie.
Click!
Huh? As you turn to slowly pull back from the kiss, slowly opening your closed eyes you see Floyds phone out. His arm is outstretched and propped in the middle of you two from the side to capture the kiss perfectly and you can only let out a gasp.
"A picture for me hehe~"
"FLOYD-"
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justwinginglife · 3 months ago
Text
Growing Pains
25 Days of Simpmas: Day Fourteen December 14th: Satoru Gojo, Rank 12 Anime: Jujutsu Kaisen Event Masterlist
Guys, don't hate me for putting Gojo so low on my list, okay? LOL. I do really love this fic though, I feel like it could be a whole series, honestly. I had the best time writing it, so I hope yall enjoy!
“Smells like trash, must be a Zenin nearby.” 
Gojo pretended to examine his surroundings, peering over his sunglasses as he sniffed the air. His eyes finally landed on you. 
You flipped him off, retorting back, “Smells like shit, must be a Gojo with his head so far up his own ass.” 
He grinned, amused. “Now, now, is that anyway to treat your fellow co-parent?”
You scoffed. “You started it, dipshit. Now, where’s the kid? It’s my weekend.”
“The kid is not a kid, and he’s sick of you two doing this every week. You know everyone else can hear you guys, right?” Megumi appeared from behind, hoisting his bag onto his shoulder as he jerked his thumb towards the high school, where all the other students were watching curiously from the windows, whispering to each other “Fushiguro’s folks are at it again.”
While you had no direct relation to Megumi and Gojo had no relation at all, you’d both retained this arrangement with each other ever since Megumi was a child. Although you came from separate clans, and lived completely separate lives, somehow, after catching wind of Megumi’s cruel fate, you’d both had the bright idea to swoop in and save him. Maybe you were sympathetic, or maybe you both just had savior complexes, but either way, before he knew it, Megumi had gone from having no parents at all to having two eager, adoptive parents. 
And they both loved him to pieces but they were constantly at odds with each other. 
Gojo frequently doubted your intentions, wondering why a Zenin -and a high ranking one, no less- who’d never been interested in Megumi before was suddenly playing mom in his kitchen. He assumed every act of kindness was a ploy used to ensnare the impressionable, young boy and chain him to the Zenin clan forever. What he didn’t realize was that you knew better than anyone the horrors of being a Zenin, and it was because you were a Zenin that you could protect him in a way that no one else could, even from your own family. So it didn’t matter that Gojo didn’t trust you- your intentions were important to no one else but yourself and you would stay true to them until your last dying breath. You would protect Megumi the way no one ever protected you. 
But even though it didn’t matter what Gojo thought of you, it sure drove you abso-fucking-lutely crazy the way he expressed his thoughts of you. 
You still remember one of the first weekends you’d spent with Megumi. At the time, you’d had no idea how to cook, having had servants to do the job for you your entire life, so you’d woken up well before dawn had even breached the sky just to attempt pancakes. By the time Megumi woke up, you’d finally managed to proudly present him with a stack of half decent food when Gojo burst in and scarfed down the whole damn plate, claiming it was for Megumi’s own safety, after all- you might’ve poisoned the dish. In revenge, you claimed that maybe you’d spread the poison across the surface of the plate too, maybe Megumi would die upon contact, so it was only fair that the plate be demolished too; you smashed the glass down on top of Gojo’s big, stupid head. And then, for good measure, you hit him with the frying pan you’d used to cook. Who knows? Maybe you’d poisoned the pan too. Unfortunately for Gojo, he had not yet mastered infinity. After that day, he had a bump the size of Japan on his head for a solid month and he cursed you every damn day that he was inflicted with it. Claimed it killed the vibe with the ladies. Good, you thought. Maybe one day you’d get around to killing him too. All in due time. 
But as much as Gojo drove you crazy, you drove him equally crazy. Once he’d been on a date and had forgotten that it was his turn to pick up Megumi. So, like any sane person would, you showed up to the date, with Megumi in hand, and wailed in front of the entire restaurant, “How could you do this to me?? How could you do this to our son?? And while I’m pregnant with your second child, too!! Oh, the horror, the betrayal, the heartbreak!! I’ll never love again!!” And after Gojo had glared daggers at you and then run off to explain to his fleeing date, you and Megumi simply enjoyed the most expensive dinner that money could buy and told the waitstaff to put it on Gojo’s bill. They were happy to do so. 
A decade later, and you were still butting heads and waging wars on a regular basis, only barely tolerating each other. But as the years went by, the two of you quickly learned that there was something even more troubling than your tiresome relationship: a teenager.
Though Megumi had never been the most in tune with or properly expressive of his own emotions as a child, it was still clear that he appreciated, valued, and even loved the family he’d found in you both, even as dysfunctional as it was. You remember when he used to insist that he didn’t need someone to tuck him into bed, scoffing and ridiculing the idea, but the minute you showed signs of neglecting this little step in his nighttime routine, he’d grumble that there was something wrong with the blanket or chide you for not properly checking his bed for bugs, and you’d smile and say “Oh, but of course,” and you’d perform your examination of his bed and then pull the covers over him, nice and snug. And it always made you laugh the way he’d egg Gojo on by calling him short, claiming that maybe that was the reason you weren’t very fond of him, or the reason he could never hold down a relationship for very long, but when Gojo would hoist him up on his shoulders to prove his towering height, you didn’t miss the way Megumi would smile slightly, enjoying his view from up high. 
And as much as you disagreed with Gojo, you knew this was the one commonality you shared. You knew he had just as many wonderful memories raising Megumi as you did and at the end of the day, even though he was a dick, even though he was a douche, he was still Megumi’s dad and you were still Megumi’s mom. You were partners. And you shared this love for Megumi. Which was why you both went absolutely berserk realizing that your son had now grown up, and had now grown detached. If you thought learning how to cook was hard or remembering when Megumi had to get to class or attempting to help with his math homework or continuously shopping for new clothes every time the boy grew -which was a lot- it wasn’t nearly as hellish as dealing with a teenager. You and Gojo were in complete, utter agreement on that. 
So now that Megumi was scowling as he chided the two of you for embarrassing him in front of all his classmates, you and Gojo now stood in total solidarity with each other, completely forgetting your previous feuds.
“Hey now, that’s no way to talk to your mother.” Gojo lightly karate chopped Megumi’s head. Megumi then slapped his hand away to which Gojo gasped in exaggerated offense. You rested your hand on his arm in support.
“Be nice to your father, you only have the one.” You reprimanded Megumi in Gojo’s defense. 
Megumi rolled his eyes. 
Gojo threw his hand out in exasperation, gesturing to Megumi’s snarky expression. “Do you see this kid- did he just roll eyes at us??” Gojo exclaimed, giving you a “The Nerve of Him” look, a look that you understood all too well. 
A decade of not being able to understand Gojo and all it took was one teenager to bring you together. Suddenly, you were able to understand his thoughts and feelings better than you ever had before. Suddenly, you understood him better than anyone else could ever begin to. And now you were starting to think that he was the only one who truly understood you too. You were in this parenting thing together. Soldiers in arms. 
“I’m not a kid and you’re not my parents.” Megumi grumbled, annoyed.
Gojo made several incoherent noises. 
“I know, I know. It’s like, we raise the kid and he’s not even grateful.” You shook your head in disbelief. “You know what, Megumi? If we’re not your parents, then maybe you can drive yourself back to the house, yeah? And after that, you can cook yourself your own dinner. How’s that?”
Gojo nodded emphatically. “Oooh, yeah, yeah, what she said!” Then he leaned over to whisper in your ear, “Genius idea, by the way.”
If you weren’t trying to appear stern, you might’ve laughed. You never thought the day would come that Gojo Satoru would side with you, let alone call you a genius. It was a nice change of pace. 
“Gojo literally taught me how to drive and you literally taught me how to cook. How is that supposed to be a threat?” Megumi crossed his arms, staring you down defiantly.
“You taught him how to drive??” You hissed at Gojo under your breath.
He threw his hands up in a panic. “Well who was the one who taught him how to cook?? Why would you do something like that?? Now he won’t need us!” He hissed back. 
Megumi rolled his eyes again.
“Would you tell him to quit doing that??” Gojo exclaimed.
“You’re his dad, you tell him!”
“Well you’re his mom!”
“-yeah, Uncle Geto? Listen, could I stay at your place tonight? They’re at it again.”
You and Gojo whipped around to face your teenage son who was now on the phone, very blatantly ignoring the two of you. 
“UNCLE GETO???” Gojo bellowed.
“Since when is he uncle? We can’t be mom and dad, but he’s uncle??” You questioned in shock. 
“Suguru, I swear, when I get my hands on you-”
You clapped a hand down on Gojo’s shoulder. “Let’s not be hasty, maybe it’s a one time thing. He is a teenager, after all, maybe he’s just doing this to get in our heads.”
Right as Gojo’s breathing began to even out again, Megumi continued, “Well if you’re busy, that’s fine, I’ll just call Aunt Ieiri.” 
“I’m sorry, WHAT?! Did he just call Shoko- Megumi, did you just call Shoko-” Your protests were drowned out by the sound of your car’s engine roaring to life. 
Megumi was stealing your car. Now he was driving away with your car. Now he was speeding in your car. Now he was disappearing around the corner. With your car.
“What just- did he just- where is he- what the-” You sputtered. 
Surprisingly, Gojo began to laugh. He laughed and he laughed and he laughed, and you thought he’d gone mad.
“Get it together, Gojo! Our kid just committed theft and is now on the run!” You smacked him on the arm.
“C’mon, we know where he’s going- Suguru’s or Shoko’s. Don’t be such a worrywart.”
You glared at the stranger who’d now materialized before you. You thought he’d understood you. You thought he was on the same page. As a matter of fact, he’d just been freaking out with you not TWO seconds ago! What was going on with him? Why was he now siding against you? You thought you’d finally come to an agreement for once in your exhausting relationship together. And you were finally liking it. You didn’t appreciate going back to your opposite sides of the fence again. “Oh, I’m the worrywart?? Who was the one that was just telling me that I shouldn’t have taught him how to cook, so that he would, ‘need us,’ as you so desperately put it??”
He laughed again, scratching the back of his head. “Yeah, I did, didn’t I? But hey. Did you see the way he put the car in reverse? The lil dude even signaled before he merged into traffic and took off with your car.”
You blinked. He… signaled? “Yeah… you’re right. Didn’t hit a damn thing. You… you actually -and I can’t believe I’m saying this, but- you taught him well.” 
He nudged your arm with his. “We taught him well. I was wondering why there were fresh tacos at the dinner table the other night. Suppose that was all your teaching.”
“T-tacos…? Yeah, I… I suppose it was.” You said quietly. 
God, Megumi was grown and you hadn’t even realized it.
He nudged you again. “C’mon. Don’t make that face, I don’t like when you get all sad. Let’s go get our kid, yeah?” 
You nodded and let Gojo lead you to his car. 
When you arrived at Geto’s place, Megumi was knocked out on the couch.
As the two of you watched him sleep peacefully, Gojo suddenly threw an arm around your shoulders, leaning some of his weight on you. For once, you didn’t mind. “Would ya look at that? He’s so tall now, he barely fits on Suguru’s lil sofa. Crazy.”
You nodded again. “So crazy. It’s like it was just yesterday that he was just begging me to cut his bangs.”
“I know, right? Can’t fit him on my shoulders anymore, that’s for sure.” Gojo laughed softly.
You grinned. “I mean, you could try. And hey, if he breaks a couple of your bones in the process, I won’t be too upset.” You teased. 
He rolled his eyes but laughed again, nonetheless. “How very cruel and very like you. But… you know. I’m starting to think you’re not all that bad, yeah?” He squeezed your shoulder playfully.
You snorted. “Oh, after ten years, I’m not that bad, huh? You finally think so, yeah? Well you’re only half decent.”
He chuckled. “Half decent, huh? I can work with that.”
You raised a brow. “Aaaand what are we working towards?”
He shrugged nonchalantly. “Dunno. You. Me. Megumi. One house. One family.”
Your eyes found the floor as your cheeks began to heat up. But you found the strength to speak. “We… we already are one family, like it or not.”
“I like it. I like it a lot. I like it more when you don’t hate me. When you’re laughing like that. When you’re blushing like that. When your-” He suddenly brought a hand up to his mouth to muffle his laughter, “when your eyes are half bulging out of your head because our kid just stole your car right out from under your nose. By the way, does that disqualify you as a sorcerer if even a teenager can get the better of you so easily?” He teased, nuzzling against your ear. 
You waved him away, retorting, “Need I remind you, that teenager got the better of you too, Mr. Special Grade Sorcerer. Not so great and powerful now, are you?” But after a moment’s hesitation, you finally muttered, “But I… I guess I like it too. The way you are. The way we are, or I guess, the way we’re getting to be. Took us some time to come around to each other, but we still made it here, all the same.”
His arm tightened around your shoulder. “Yeah. We finally made it to a good place.” He tilted his head towards Megumi. “He’ll make it there too. We took our sweet time, now we just need to give him some time. He’ll get there. After all, we did raise him. He’ll turn out just fine.”
You smiled softly. “You know, Satoru, you’re surprisingly good at this advice thing. Maybe you should be a teacher.”
He laughed.
“Me?"
"A teacher?”
“Maybe in another life.”
Taglist: @pixelcafe-network @minasfwoopyponytail @ouiouimochi @inkytypewriter
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joelmillers-whore · 1 year ago
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Hard Light | Chapter 1
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summary: when a new english professor begins teaching your class for the duration of your semester, you can’t help but develop an innocent crush on him. he’s as off-limits as he can be, but that doesn’t deter you in the slightest. after a drunk night, you accidentally email him something that wasn’t intended to ever be seen by anyone. but that doesn’t matter. it triggers a misunderstanding that manifests into an affair with your professor who is twenty years your senior. nothing good could come of this, right? 
pairings: professor!joel x college student!reader
word count: 2.2K
series or one-shot
warnings: 18+ explicit, minors DNI, no mention of Y/N, alternate universe, professor/student relationship, eventual smut, self-esteem issues, workaholic, joel x female!reader, infatuation bordering on obsession (stay delulu friends), some sexual thoughts, masturbation (f), joel being a huge tease lol, (will add more tags as i write)
AN: i am so excited by the response that my joel one-shot got a few days ago and i’ve been itching to get something else out to you all. big, giant forehead kisses for those who want one, i love you all. so, anyway, a mini-series about professor joel is coming at you fast. i’ve written the first few chapters, so expect those in the near future. i’m thinking once a week? this fic is going to be something else and i’m so excited to share it with ya’ll. enjoy, and let me know what you think. find my ao3 here for more content and other fandoms.
You were running late for your shift at the coffee shop on campus, rummaging around your dresser, trying to find the low-cut black top you always wore when you had a shift. You weren’t usually one to feed into the peer pressure of those around you, but push came to shove when you found it nearly impossible to keep yourself afloat as a twenty-something student without the added extra tips from your part-time job.
So what if you had to show a little bit of cleavage? Right? There was no harm. Student loans were a bitch and on top of rent and food costs, you had to get a job at the coffee shop and balance a full course load just to make ends meet. 
A thought popped into your head and you rushed to your laptop, throwing it open as you checked the time; 5:45 AM. If you busted out your lightning-fast typing skills, you would have enough time to catch the next bus and make it to campus with five minutes to spare. If only your crappy second-hand computer would work.
The thing honestly sounded like a chopper engine, getting ready for lift-off. You were surprised you’d gotten this far with it. Not that you weren’t appreciative, your older brother had passed it down and it had relieved a huge weight—  and expense off of your shoulders. 
You tabbed into your school portal, typing in your credentials and selecting your English course. You sighed heavily, as you skimmed over the assignment for this week, something to do with a sonnet that you couldn’t care less about. You loved school but ever since becoming an English major, the spark that you once had for literature sort of just evaporated.
You couldn’t tell if it was because of how busy you were with everything else that you just couldn’t find the time to enjoy it, or the thought that really scared you, you had fallen out of love with it. 
It had been two years of go, go, go and you were, for lack of a better word, burnt out. You’d tried dropping courses last semester, thinking that you just needed a little bit of ease when it came to your course load, but when that didn’t solve the problem and only made things worse for you, you spent the last two semesters trying to catch up and get yourself to a place where you could finally breathe.
But it wasn’t easy. You were only now caught up to where you had been, the illusion that you were someone who could afford to take time off and slow down was a distant memory. 
In bold letters, the words Paid Internship jumped off of the screen. You smiled as you leaned in closer to the screen, making sure you read through everything correctly. This was the break above the surface that you needed, the reprieve that you had been chasing. A paid internship was exactly how you’d be able to make more money and maybe have a little breathing room before you worked yourself into an early grave.
You clicked the mail icon at the top and clicked into a new email, deciding that the worst-case scenario was that you wouldn’t get the internship. All you were doing was inquiring about the application process. Best-case scenario; you’d get it and make some extra pocket money. 
You saw the time, cursing under your breath as you slammed the laptop closed, grabbed your phone out of the charger and ran out of the door. You couldn’t be late, not again. You texted your co-worker Jeremy to open the shop without you and explained to him that you were running a few minutes late, as you barely made it to the bus. You climbed on board, scanned your student pass and found a seat near the back. Your chest was burning from the rush of trying to make it on time, but you could breathe easy now.
You checked your messages mindlessly, scrolling through a bunch of unread ones that you didn’t have the heart to answer. 
Before you knew it, the familiar monuments and buildings of UT Austin came into view, and the subtle change of scenery from downtown to a more densely packed area made your heart skip a beat. It was the same each time you were back on campus. Which, these days, was often. Sliding out of the seat, you made your way to the front, thanking the driver as the bus came to a complete stop. 
The coffee shop was only a short walk from the bus stop but even still you quickened your pace. You didn't want to leave Jeremy alone for long, you already felt bad enough about letting him open by himself. You stifled a yawn as you pushed open the door to the small cafe, leaning your body into the door, slightly cringing at the shrill sound of the bell. 
"There you are", a male voice called, making your head snap up. You wiggled your nose, the familiar timbre of your ex-boyfriend's voice ringing in your ears. "It's about time you got your ass down here". 
You snickered, shrugging your heavy bag off of your shoulder, and dropping it behind the counter, turning around and greeting him with an unamused smirk.
Jeremy and you had gone out for a few months last year, it was your first and, as of right now, the only short-term relationship that you'd had in college. 
Dating your co-worker, even in a relatively small place like the coffee shop on campus, almost always spelled trouble, but Jeremy was not the type to hold something like a failed relationship over your head. He understood that school was a priority for you and making a living for yourself came first, even above something like a relationship. It might not be the healthiest way to live, but it was how it always was. 
Jeremy and you had developed a fast friendship, one that went beyond the romantic relationship that you'd had last year. You parted amicably and now, you had someone you could confide in, someone you could trust. 
"Why don't you say that to my face?", you teased, raising a brow at him over the milk frother you were setting up. 
Jeremy threw his rag down and stalked over to you. "You're snippy this morning", he chided. 
You banged into his shoulder playfully, "Doesn't help that I have to see your ugly mug first thing in the morning". 
You snorted out a laugh and Jeremy looked at you, feigning defensiveness, "Ouch", he paused, returning back to his post near the coffee machine, "Remind me how we ever went out?". 
You scrunched your nose and threw your rag at Jeremy, hitting him square in the face with it, "That was rude". 
He shrugged his shoulder, "You started it".  
You both devolved into a fit of giggles and fell into a comfortable silence, setting up and getting the coffee shop ready for the day. You had a half-day shift to look forward to and then you had class until the late afternoon. The days were long and the nights were longer.
You usually found yourself nose-deep in your textbooks, more often than not, or some classic novel that was required for class, not moving from the couch until your eyes were red and you were seeing double. 
Only then did you retire to sleep, crashing hard until you had to wake up and do it all again the next day. 
───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────
The coffee shop had been bustling with people since six in the morning, and at one in the afternoon, it hadn't let up, only now you had to go to class. Waving Jeremy goodbye, you sidestepped Tara, the fourth-year who was covering the rest of the afternoon and closing shift. 
You'd crossed the far side of campus, passing by the science building and one of the massive libraries that had acted like a second home to you back when you’d been studying for exams when you were a freshman. You could thank your obnoxious roommates for that one. 
Entering the lecture hall, bodies pressed into you as you weaved through the growing crowd, trying to find a spot in the middle where you could see and hear your English professor. But also blend in with the masses. As if the universe had other plans in mind, and everyone suddenly showed up to the Tuesday lecture all at the same time, you found yourself picking a seat near the front, an exasperated groan leaving you. 
You hated sitting at the front, not because you didn't want to get called on to answer something or because you didn't know the answers, but because you did. You wanted to get through your four years as quickly and unscathed as possible and if people knew, mainly professors, that you knew more about the subject matter than you needed to, you'd surely get called on more often, making you stick out in ways you didn't want. 
It was a terrible curse, going through life with the self-esteem that you did. But it was how you were raised. Blend in. Don't be too loud. Be quiet and only observe. Nerves rapped at your insides when you thought about getting called on when class started. Your heart rate ticked up and you found that your hands were beginning to get clammy, your throat constricting with each breath.
You rubbed your hands up and down your thighs, grounding yourself with the sensation of the material. 
With a jump, you sat up straighter in your seat, being jostled from your thoughts by a loud slam. You snapped your head toward the entrance, eying the person who had startled everyone. It was a man carrying a briefcase.
Your lips tilted up at the edges, amusement tickling you when you thought of anyone using a briefcase nowadays. But here this man was, head down as he made his way to the front of the room, toward the desk. 
You couldn't help keeping your eyes trained on him. On how his slacks tightened around his butt, moulding to the shape and curve of it. You bit your bottom lip out of reflex, your eyes dragging down the length of the mystery man who had crashed your lecture. Maybe he was a TA? Your brows furrowed when you thought about how your professor was nowhere in sight. 
The man with the briefcase placed his case on the desk, turning to face the audience of students who blinked back at him, who now settled down enough to hear him speak. Air caught in your throat when his eyes flicked momentarily to you, and lingered on you for half a second longer than you'd expected. He had massive, warm brown eyes, and soft wrinkles that danced at the edges of his eyes when he smiled, making him seem more boyish than he appeared.
He looked older than a TA would but then again, who were you to judge someone's position in life? You thought that his age did nothing to undermine just how attractive he was, if anything it added to it.  
The man, who may or may not have been moonlighting as your English TA cleared his throat, nodding his head, "My name is Joel, well, Professor Miller to most, but 've always been a little bit more informal than my peers". 
He began to circle the wooden desk nervously, his large hand finding the edge of it and stroking it far more sensually than necessary. You flexed your fingers, gripping the arm of your seat to stabilize yourself. "So, you can call me Joel from here on out... since we'll be seeing more of each other from now on". 
Murmurs began to break out around the lecture hall, and confused and hushed whispers followed. 
Professor Miller— Joel, mumbled something incoherent, and you were unable to hear it from where you sat. He cleared his throat again, "Professor McCarthy has taken a leave of absence, so I'll be filling in for him for the remainder of the semester". 
You crossed your legs, feeling heat rise and a furious blush break out across your face, and shuffled in your seat, a loud creak emitted from it and you stilled, praying that the loud sound had only been heard by you and no one else. But when you lifted your gaze, Joel's eyes were already locked on you, blown and brimming with cautious inquiry. A touch of a smirk graced his lips. 
"And I look forward to getting to know each and every one of you, personally". His eyes were still on you, not ready to release you from their hold. 
His tongue darted out to wet his lips and you couldn't help but stare. You had every reason to look away from him, he was your professor and given the clear age difference, he was someone who was off limits. But when he didn't look away from you either, trapping you with his gaze, your face heated up, suddenly aware that he was purposely staring at you. 
You swallowed thickly, heart hammering as Joel's eyes finally drifted away from you and back to the faces of your classmates. He continued on with addressing the class, and you noticed that he avoided your eyes for the rest of the lecture. 
Only one thought rang through your mind as you tried and failed to focus back on the lecture. This was going to be one long semester. 
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dazaih · 20 days ago
Text
wingman - luke skywalker x reader
chapter one chapter two chapter three -> cloud city
your university roommate han solo finds a rival (and love interest) in student council president leia skywalker, but both of them are too stubborn to admit that they have feelings for each other. luckily, you and her twin brother, luke, devise a plan to get the two of them to spend more time together. challenges arise, however, when you start to develop a crush on him.
chapter warnings: drugs and alcohol, slight sexual tension
a/n: here is part 3 as promised! also just an advanced warning that the next chapter will have violence and drama, but i’ll mark where the violent parts are so you can skip if anyone is queasy about that sort of thing :)
The days trudged on as usual, and the events of Friday night felt far away come Monday morning. The rest of your weekend was relatively uneventful, you and Han going to see some local bands at a bar nearby on Saturday, and sleeping off the hangover and doing homework Sunday. Pretty standard weekend.
Classes were uneventful too, though midterms were rapidly approaching and you were beginning to feel the pressure. By Friday, you were growing exhausted, and you needed a break. Walking home from class, you felt your phone buzz in your pocket.
roomies 😈🧨
2 notifications
From Han: Live show tonight downtown. Some upscale venue, but Lando’s a manager there so he got us tickets. Interested?
Han: Also, the twins wanna know if we wanna come do homework with them on Sunday at their apartment. I don’t really wanna go alone so if you’re not up to it I’m just gonna tell her royal highness that we can meet at a library.
You smiled at the screen, excited to be going somewhere tonight and getting a much needed break from academics.
You: ohh they share an apartment? think it’ll be luxurious? should we wear suits?
Han: I’d rather die. Bet it’ll be pretty nice though. Might even shower before we go.
You: how thoughtful of you <3
Chewie: nah i gotta meet my project partners sunday
Chewie: han r u sure it’s a good idea 2 go to cloud city tn? thought u and lando were on bad terms??
Han: He extended an olive branch, so I’m taking it. No big deal.
Chewie: lol whatever u say. i’ll tag along to keep u out of trouble but if u get into some shit it’s all on u bro
Han: Thanks pal. Glad you have my back.
Giggling quietly to yourself, you slipped your phone back into your pocket. Tonight would be fun.
─── ・ 。゚☆: .☽ . :☆゚. ───
Cloud City was one of the nicer bars you’d been to. You almost felt that the three of you were underdressed, given the crowd that had shown up. Most of them were the preppy peers you’d gotten so accustomed to, and you supposed that even if the band was slightly less polished, the quality of the bar itself still attracted that rich college kid demographic. You all, on the other hand, were dressed in your usual secondhand attire, though you’d done quite a nice job layering a stylish lace top with a turtleneck, and you swapped your usual combat boots for ones that were a little bit sleeker.
Han had dressed up a little too, his Carhartt jacket having been replaced by a brown leather one, though the rest of his attire was mostly the same. Chewie was in his usual flannel and jeans, but his long hair was tied into a loose bun tonight, and his beanie was nowhere to be seen. You guys cleaned up nicely.
You quickly made your way to the front of the crowd, trailing behind Han, who always wanted to be as close to the stage as possible. You were surrounded by boys in fraternities and girls with designer party dresses, but as you moved along with the music, you didn’t feel so out of place. Everyone was incredibly drunk anyway, and when Chewie disappeared only to return with a glass of whiskey for Han and a mixed drink for you, you couldn’t help but follow suit. You swayed along to the music some more before the band took a break, at which point you followed Han to the bar.
Lando—you’d only met him a few times—stood behind it, face lighting up as he caught sight of you all.
“Han Solo!” he exclaimed, reaching across the bar to give the man a hug. Han stiffened, but tried to be as cordial as possible, giving the other man an awkward pat on the back. You leaned against the bar and rested your elbows on the counter, trying to hide your smile behind your hand as you watched Han’s discomfort unfold.
“Haven’t seen you in forever! Or your dear friend,” he added, surprising you by taking your hand and placing a soft kiss upon your knuckles. Your face flushed, and Han smacked his wrist as he pulled away. Lando only smiled.
“Good to see you, Lando,” you said politely, “Thanks for getting us these tickets. How’d you get a gig like this anyway?”
“My supreme management skills, I suppose,” he replied with a wink before greeting Chewie and then shifting his attention back to Han.
The two of them chatted, Lando offering to get you all drinks on the house. You sipped yours and listened to them reminisce on old times, and you recalled that the two of them had been friends when Han had gone to community college outside of the city.
Growing bored, you let your eyes wander across the venue, feeling a little more awkward now that you had a chance to look at the crowd. Lululemon tops and Golden Goose sneakers stared back at you, and you suddenly felt a little self conscious. A particularly rowdy group of men got your attention, drunkenly shouting their entire conversations and swaying. Those were the type of men you were least comfortable around, always expecting them to make fun of you or give you a hard time. You had intended on looking away from them before you could accidentally make eye contact, but it was too late. One of them caught your eye, and when he met your stare so did the guy next to him. You were expecting them to yell at you to mind your own business, but whether or not they would have remained a mystery, because the third person to turn to look at you was someone you knew.
There, in all of his drunken glory, stood Luke Skywalker, his arm slung around another man and his other hand holding a pint of beer. You remembered that Luke didn’t like beer, and wondered why he was drinking it. When he saw you, his eyes widened, and you briefly wondered if he was going to pretend not to know you.
How wrong you were.
You had half the mind to step away from the bar—and Han—as he approached you, the very group you’d been eyeing judgmentally strolling behind him, clearly confused but content to follow him around anyway. He called out your name excitedly, and when he arrived at where you were standing, he pulled you into a warm embrace. You flinched a little, spilling your drink right onto his sparkling white slacks, and you braced yourself for the interaction to quickly sour.
“Oh shit,” he mumbled, looking down at his pants with a frown, “Sorry. Didn’t mean to spill your drink. I’ll get you another one.”
You didn’t have time to refuse his offer before he was grabbing your hand, pulling you to the bar and immediately getting the attention of Lando, who looked just as shocked as you were to see you being dragged along by a very drunk Luke Skywalker.
“Lando!” he hollered, offering the other man a wide smile, “Can you please make another—well, whatever that was? You can add it to my tab. Thank you!”
Lando seemed amused and happily brewed another drink for you, but in reimbursing you, Luke had also taken you all right back into Han’s space. His eyes were wide too, and he gestured for you to come to where he was sitting. You complied, sneaking away from Luke for a second to stand by Han’s side.
“What the hell?” he whisper-yelled, hands on your shoulders, “This—this is crazy. You don’t think the princess is here, do you? I’m too drunk for this shit. Whatever Lando gave me was strong.”
“It’s okay. I think he’s here with the soccer team or his friends or whatever. I don’t know. I didn’t even think he was gonna speak to me, and then he did, and I spilled my vodka cran all over his white pants and—“
“And now he’s buying you a drink. What have we done?” Han said, sighing and putting his head in his hands, “Now everyone’s gonna think we’re getting friendly with snot-nosed rich kids.”
“You’re the only one who cares about that shit anyway. Your reputation will be fine,” you snorted, adding, “And I can keep him out of your way. He’ll probably go back to whatever he was doing after a little small talk. It’s not a big deal.”
“You keeping him out of my way is exactly what I’m worried about. The kid’s stumbling over his own two feet, and you know how drunk men act—especially entitled ones like him.”
“Han,” you warned, “I told you not to get overbearing with me. I’ll be fine, and you and Chewie are here too.”
Chewie let out a hum of acknowledgement, giving Han a thumbs up when he looked his way.
“Okay,” he said, sighing in defeat, “But if he tries anything, come get me immediately.”
“You know I will,” you assured him, squeezing his shoulder.
Just then, Luke returned to your side, having found your new location.
“Oh shit! You guys are here too?” he cheered, standing between Han and Chewie and pulling them into a group hug, “This is so exciting! Lando, can you get a round of shots for the four of us? You can throw in a fifth for yourself, if you want. My tab again.”
“Alright, kid, you really don’t have to—“ Han began, but was cut off by a beaming Luke.
“Don’t be ridiculous! You guys were so nice to have me over the other day. It’s the least I can do.”
“You already brought us those donuts,” you told him, and, upon hearing your voice, he returned to your side, releasing Han and Chewie from his embrace. You noticed he was empty handed, and briefly wondered where the drink he’d bought you was.
“Lando has your drink,” he explained, as if reading your mind, “Wanted him to hand it to you. Just so you don’t have to worry about that stuff, y’know?”
Luke’s explanation was only partly clear, but you think you understood: he didn’t want you to be concerned that he’d put something in your drink while he was away. It was an amusing gesture, but also surprisingly thoughtful. You nodded, and Lando handed your newly brewed beverage to you across the bar. When the round of shots came out, Luke raised his glass to your lips. Your face flushed, but again, you understood. You placed your glass to his lips as well.
“Cheers!” he said happily, and he poured the shot into your mouth with a delicacy that you were impressed he could pull off in his already intoxicated state. You followed his lead, pouring the drink into his mouth as he tilted his head back. You watched each other carefully, and that familiar glint of mischief shone in his eyes once more.
Before Han could react to that, you pulled Luke away from him, and the two of you drifted back into the crowd. His friends hovered nearby, all of them regarding you with some element of shock and confusion. Maybe Luke didn’t flirt with many people in public, but judging by his skill at it, you found that difficult to believe.
You were snapped back into reality by the feeling of his thumb pressing against the corner of your mouth, swiping up a stray bit of alcohol that had escaped your shot glass. You knew your face had to be beet red at the moment, and you almost passed out when you felt the pad of his thumb press against your bottom lip. Wordlessly, you took the tip of his finger into your mouth, licking the drop that lingered there. He stared at you with wide eyes, and you momentarily panicked, worried that he hadn’t intended for you to do that at all. However, when his smile widened and he flashed you those pearly whites, you knew you had done the right thing. He leaned forward, placing a hand on your arm.
“You’re somethin’ else,” he whispered, his breath fanning across your neck, once again sending a shiver down your spine.
“Just following your lead,” you whispered back, leaning into his touch slightly.
Just then, the band took the stage again, and you watched Han and Chewie start to make their way into the crowd. Before you could say anything, however, Luke gestured towards his friends, beckoning them to come closer. When they finally did, you couldn’t help but feel self conscious. They were all fit men, and all conventionally attractive. They wore slacks and polos, and you realized that Luke was the only one who wore a loose fitting sweater out of the group. He looked slightly out of place amongst them, his style and his slightly shorter stature being an obvious explanation, but there was something else that you couldn’t quite place. Perhaps it was the smile he wore, genuine and reaching his eyes.
“These are my teammates,” he explained, and then he proceeded to name five of them. You would never remember their names, but you didn’t think they’d ever seek you out to speak to you again anyway, so it wasn’t a huge issue.
“It’s nice to meet you,” you greeted them politely, offering a small wave, “Are you enjoying the band?”
Most of them looked at you awkwardly, but one of them did actually dignify your question with a response. It was the man Luke had his arm around earlier, you noted. You thought his name might have been Biggs.
“I’m not really into this type of music,” he replied, placing a hand on Luke’s shoulder, “But Luke loves it, and I like the bar, so here I am.”
You must have looked at Luke with visible surprise, because he offered you a small explanation.
“Leia is really into the punk scene, so she plays stuff like this a lot. And grunge. Anything you could get punched in the face to, she likes,” he told you.
“Of course she does,” one of the other men said, “Probably likes actually punching people in the face too, doesn’t she?”
Luke rolled his eyes, and you felt his grip on your arm tighten slightly. Not enough to hurt, but enough to indicate that he was a little irritated by that comment. You knew these guys probably didn’t like you very much anyway, so you decided to push back on them a bit.
“Leia? I couldn’t imagine her punching anyone,” you said, before adding, “Unless they deserved it.”
“You’re kidding,” the third teammate replied, staring at you skeptically, “I’ve never had a positive interaction with her, and I’m over at their apartment all the time. The best I can hope for is that she just leaves when we get there.”
“Really? I’ve only ever had positive interactions with her. I think she’s sweet.”
Everyone except for Biggs looked at you strangely, but you felt Luke relax a little, and that seemed more important. Just then, someone across the bar started beckoning Luke over, and he squeezed your arm and said, “One second. I’ll be right back.” Once he was gone, it was just you and his teammates.
“The only thing about her that’s sweet is her ass,” one of them remarked once Luke had drifted far enough away from the group, “And the rest of her body too, I guess. If she wasn’t such a bitch I’d probably take her out.”
You were starting to get a better idea of what Luke’s teammates were like, and you didn’t think you cared much for them.
“Maybe that’s why she doesn’t like you. Because you talk about women like that,” you muttered, but you knew he’d heard you when he raised his eyebrows and scoffed.
“Uh huh,” he began, moving so that he was standing directly in front of you, “And what do you know about her? Think you’re an expert on the Skywalkers because Luke wants to sleep with you? I’ve seen him pull that shot pouring trick on countless people—even other dudes. The only thing that sets you apart from them is that you dress like you grew up in a trailer park, but I hope you know that being his new charity case doesn’t make you special.”
You felt your blood boil and you clenched your fists at your sides, doing everything in your power to resist smacking him across the face. Instead, you took a deep breath to steady yourself, and you met his eyes.
“Don’t speak to me like that ever again,” you said sternly, inching just a bit closer to him and shoving your hand against his chest, “If you think my clothes are dirty, you should see how I fight.”
“You fight dirty?”
Luke’s voice nearly made you jump out of your skin, and you immediately let your hand fall back to your side, stepping away from his friend.
“Luke—“ the man began, but Luke just waved his hand dismissively.
“Nah, don’t care, Elias,” he said before turning back to you, “Much more interested in what you mean by fighting dirty. Can you show me what you’re talking about?”
You couldn’t help but let out a surprised laugh, staring at him with wide eyes. You could never anticipate how he was going to react to things.
“We might find out if Elias doesn’t calm the fuck down,” Biggs replied with a sigh, taking the man’s drink out of his hand, “You always turn into such an asshole when you have too much, dude.”
“What’d he say?” Luke asked you, and you briefly deliberated on whether or not you were going to out Elias and his bad manners.
“Don’t worry about it,” you told him, looking at Elias smugly, “Just friendly fire, right?”
Your adversary studied your face for a moment, realizing that his best bet was to stop challenging you entirely.
“Just friendly fire,” he muttered, before turning to you, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment and his expression apologetic, “I’m sorry. Biggs is right. I get a little confrontational when I drink too much.”
“It’s fine,” you said, sighing and subconsciously leaning into Luke a little, “I should be getting back to my friends. It was nice talking to you again, Luke. And it was nice meeting all of you. I’ll see you soon.”
Despite Luke’s call of your name and protests, you made your way to the front of the crowd, finding Han and Chewie jostling each other around in a lighthearted mosh pit. Upon your return, Han pulled you into his side, ruffling your hair with his free hand.
“Somethin’ wrong, kid?” he asked when the song ended, the pause in music giving you a brief moment to explain yourself.
“His teammates suck,” you said simply, frowning a bit.
“Ah,” Han replied, seeming to understand, “Yeah. Leia doesn’t like them.”
Trying not to let your giddiness at the fact that Han and Leia had been learning more about each other show, you just nodded.
“They were talking shit about her as soon as Luke turned his back. That’s why we started arguing. And then one of them called me poor.”
“And what did you say?”
“Threatened to hit him,” you murmured, slightly embarrassed by your outburst.
“Good,” Han replied with a proud grin, offering you some of his drink, “Looks like he’s taking your side, at least.”
You peered through the crowd to see Luke with his arms crossed over his chest, looking thoroughly unimpressed by whatever his friends were telling him. Elias was trying to explain himself, it seemed, and you had seen the words “fuck off” uttered enough in your lifetime to be able to read Luke’s lips at the moment. He disappeared from your view when he walked back to the bar, Biggs following him and the rest of his teammates trailing farther behind.
“Whatever. He’ll find someone else to flirt with. Someone in his tax bracket.”
You weren’t sure why, but knowing that Luke had flirted with so many other people before you that he’d developed a formulaic technique for it had wounded your pride a little. It’s not like you had any real hopes of the two of you being together, and you didn’t even know him well enough to feel anything towards him, but you were self conscious about your own relative inexperience.
“Don’t talk like that,” Han chided, frowning at you.
“You talk like that all the time,” you argued, looking to Chewie for help. He just shrugged, a silent plea for you to leave him out of it.
“But you shouldn’t put yourself down,” he said, “He’d be lucky to have you, y’know.”
You sighed, trying to let yourself relax a little.
“Thanks,” you said sincerely, “It doesn’t usually bother me, but sometimes—I don’t know. I feel so out of place sometimes.”
“I understand. ‘S alright to feel like that, but you belong at this venue more than the rest of those punks.”
You chuckled quietly, and when the next song began, you allowed Han and Chewie to pull you into their mosh circle. With the alcohol warming your blood, you let yourself get lost in the music. You couldn’t help it, however, when your mind wandered to the memory of Luke pouring that shot into your mouth, longing for more than the fleeting feeling of his finger pressing against your parted lips.
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bme-girl · 8 months ago
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Top 6 things I learned in my first 6 months of my PhD
So here I am, 6 months into this thing that I dreamed of doing for years in my undergrad, and at some point even something I thought wasn't going to happen after initial rejections.
In no order:
#1: However long you think it will take to complete a piece of your project or most tasks really, even with a generous estimate, double that time lol
#2: There is literally no point to comparing yourself to your peers, and that is liberating! :) everyone in your cohort and lab has a unique and different background. In my case, I'm an engineer in a room FULL of psychologists and each one of them is so different from the other still! Comparing yourself/your project or your accomplishments to them and theirs makes absolutely no sense :D so remember that always and be free!
#3: If your supervisor(s)* aren't freaking out or nervous about something, whether it's a deadline, milestone, whatever, then neither should you be!! (*assuming good, supportive supervisors)
#4: In the beginning, take advantage of being new and introduce yourself to EVERYONE and at least get an idea of what they do. You never know who may be able to help you with the annoying server, the niche programming package, or a particular difficult method later down the line.
#5: Remember you are a student. Don't be so hard on yourself and think "damn, I should know this already" or "wow how embarassing idk how to do this." Student is part of your title (still applies to candidates), and if you knew these things already, then you'd have the degree already and there'd be no need to venture in and learn anything ;)
#6: Be honest when you are struggling. Even simply to the colleague or lab buddy that says "how's it going?" I can't tell you how many times I've been vulnerable and said "actually this weekend I had a little cry because I was homesick" and my buddy gives me a hug, and I feel SO much better afterward. Or my colleague shares a similar story and I don't feel so alone :) support systems are everything in this journey!
Some of these were told to me by our most senior PhD (now postdoc) in our lab, and they ring true. I try to keep these all in mind when I am stressed or struggling, and they have helped immensely.
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pomefioredove · 7 months ago
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I've mentioned vil and yuu being similar before but I haven't really gone into the depths of why this is so significant to me
vil is a really insecure person. in his looks, to a degree, but more poignantly, his personality. I'm almost tempted to compare him to malleus, but in a much different way; vil is adored, yes, but more so as an object than a person, and the person behind his looks is seen as intimidating and mean and cold. he's forced into the role of the villain, both metaphorically and literally, and he resents that. he's implied to have been isolated and othered by his peers when he was a child, which does some MONUMENTAL damage, too.
this is largely projection but, in a way, I see him as someone who is so terrified about being evil that he just... gives up. he does act unfairly cruel and mean sometimes, he does accept the role he was given by his peers (and the adults in his life, which, hoh my god, is a whole other thing). he is treated like a bad person, so he starts believing he's a bad person, and then starts acting on that belief, even though that's not really who he is.
vil is a character who harbors a lot of shame and resentment toward himself. he's always first to blame himself when something is wrong because he takes on so much responsibility being the intimidating, cold, confident leader everyone assumes he is. but, god, is he sad. he's so insecure and so often miserable and he has no outlet because he feel he can't, or doesn't deserve, to be vulnerable. and I think that he sort of hates that about himself, that he feels like that in the first place.
I think people tend to misunderstand his hatred towards neige. he's jealous. like, veritably so, and not just of his looks, but of him as a person. his innocence, his kindness. neige is always the victim and vil is always the villain. vil can't ask for help because that's the role he's been given. he resents neige because neige has a family full of people he can rely on, he's adored, he's allowed to be sad and scared and vil isn't. it's bitter and petty but understandable. I love him
yuu is insecure about their lack of magic. there are a lot of lines that imply they feel worthless and useless to their friends. they're quiet and insecure and unkempt and live in a rotting building but they are still pressured to just accept it.
yuu is expected to be grateful to crowley and nrc. they are expected to adapt. they are expected to be mature, and responsible, and motherly to grim, and caring towards the other students. they're put in this role of the caretaker, and they're forced to accept it, but they have no autonomy. they feel helpless in a lot of ways. they and vil are just... complete opposites but their cores are the same and that's so significant to me.
idk. there's more to be said but I kinda forgot what I was saying lol. I just think yuu and vil are more similar than people give them credit for. and I think vilyuu is so cute and good, especially for vil, because seeing the things you hate about yourself reflected in someone you love just makes them so much better. it's so healing. they're in lovr and im throwing them a summer wedding
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walrus150915 · 9 months ago
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cw: discussions of nonsexual grooming
There is one thing that has been spinning on my mind ever since I watched the movie. This conversation isn't that popular in the fandom, probably due to its uncomfortable subject matter, but it needs to be discussed. I'll be the one to start
The Director has groomed Ambrosius and it affected him far into adulthood
(A really long analysis post)
Warning: I'm not a psychologist neither am I really educated in this sphere, and I never was a victim of grooming, so don't take my words as 100% truth. However, I'm a literature student, so I can analyse a few scenes and make a conclusion lol
So, to start off, let's share the definition of grooming, shall we?
"Grooming is when someone builds a relationship, trust and emotional connection with a child or young person so they can manipulate, exploit and abuse them."
Now, of course Ambrosius is an adult in the movie, and we can't exactly know his entire history with the Director. So this analysis will take a few things as truth despite them not being confirmed
- the Director has been by Ambrosius's side throughout most of his life. Considering the fact that she's been around even when Ballister was a child, the same can be assumed about Ambrosius
- we as viewers do not see Ambrosius's parents (because this is quite unnecessary to the narrative, maybe we'll see them in a sequel Quane and Bruno were teasing buttt¯\_(ツ)_/¯), and he's been in the Institute since childhood, so it seems like the Director was the most reliable adult in Ambrosius's life
Despite Ambrosius being a grown man, the effect the Director has on him cannot be denied. His relationship to the Director is like half his character arc, the man being torn between his loyalty to the kingdom and his lover
I will take a few scenes from the movie where Ambrosius and the Director interact and try to analyse them
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Starting off strong, we've got the "acting like common children" scene. I could point out the obvious bias the Director puts in her words (villainizing an oppressed group of people as a rich white woman in power how nice of her) but we ain't coming to her throat for classism today. Pay attention to her praising Ambrosius and singling him out. "Thankfully, we have a descendant of Gloreth to lead us"
Are other knights happy to be around Ambrosius tho? The answer is no
(Text below is taken from the screenplay. The scene is after Nimona's and Bal's escape)
***
Knights: I knew we never should have trusted Ballister./If Goldenloin hadn't trusted him.../Well, if Goldenloin hadn't helped him...
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Todd: This is his fault!
Knights: Yeah!/Tell him, Todd!
Goldenloin realizes all eyes are on him
***
I think it wouldn't be wrong to assume Ambrosius's colleagues dislike him at best and outcast him at worst. Compared to Todd, who seems to be the more liked one amongst their peers (bro really is a jock bully high school stereotype in his 20s isn't that embarrassing), Ambrosius is isolated. He doesn't have anybody except Ballister and the Director. And as you all know Ballister and Ambrosius are separated for the most of the movie. So it leaves him with the Director as the closest person to interact with. Yeah...
Also in this scene she displays TWO tactics groomers use to manipulate their victims: isolation and favouritism
Another scene I'd like to pay attention to is Ambrosius's ✨iconic✨ freak out
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"What's on your mind, Ambrosius? You can talk to me"
"...I'm fine, Director"
This scene actually left me confused on the first watch because it looks like a perfect moment for the Director to seem at least somewhat sympathetic. It truly seems like she cares about him
Honestly it's pretty hard for me to surely say whether or not she's being sincere or not but her goal is definitely to win over Ambrosius's trust, to make him believe she's a safe person (now that his real safe person is away ajdjdjj). That is also another tactic for groomers to manipulate their victims
And I think it would be fair to mention Director's attitude towards Ballister's and Ambrosius's relationship. It's obvious she knows about them (...not like it's rocket science have you seen these lovebirds) and disapproves. She doesn't outright state it but it's really clear
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"Sir Goldenloin, is your loyalty to this Kingdom or to the knight who consorts with a monster?"
Again, amazing case of manipulation. She doesn't say Institute, nor "me" or whatever. She says kingdom. And she clearly knows that it works on Ambrosius, because he is, after all, Gloreth's descendant. Gloreth was the original protector, and Ambrosius is supposed to be the protector now. By choosing Ballister he betrays the kingdom, his bloodline and Gloreth
Now, I know this scene is not Ambrosius & the Director because it's Nimona in disguise but considering how good Nimona was in playing her part we might as well assume real Ambrosius would act the same.
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Look at these eyes. He's afraid of her. She has the complete power over him. And Ballister is aware of this (if that's how he told Nimona to act)
Off-topic but I watched Nimona with two of my buddies yesterday and during this scene they both went like "Wait, who is she to Ambrosius again? Is she his mother? Because she acts like she one" and they are so damn right???
Now remember the fact that during one of the interviews Eugene Lee Yang said that the Director is Ambrosius's parental figure. Do with this information whatever you wanna do
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I'm still not over her audacity in this scene. Her lip didn't even twitch and she's killing a person whom she praised for his bloodline. Saying "May Gloreth forgive you" while DRIVING A SWORD THROUGH HIM is beyond evil like??? Chill out Nancy Reagan???
I could say that this is the scene that debacles the American model minority myth (with East Asians being put on a pedestal and used to further reinforce white supremacy). A white woman killing an East Asian man while using a Christ-like figure to justify her actions (Gloreth is literally mentioned to be a Christ figure in the art book), and, if we take into account the theory that she wanted to set Ballister up so that it looks like he killed Ambrosius, BLAMING IT ON A BROWN ASIAN MAN was really a choice huh
The Director killed Ambrosius the second he questioned her, the second he wasn't useful to her
And how was he being useful to her? Allow me to introduce you to the scene which made me SUPER uncomfortable once I realized what was going on
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During most of the movie Ambrosius acts rather impulsively, reflexes play a big part in his body language. And what does he do? He protects her with his body
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"We need to get you to safety!"
Ambrosius was trained in a way that he needed to protect the Director with his body and his life.
Even in scenes where Ambrosius and the Director don't interact you can see how much Ambrosius is brainwashed.
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"She manipulated you. She manipulated both of us. But together we'll take her down, you'll be a knight again"
"Thank you. The Director can't-"
"The Director? Oh, no, Bal. I'm talking about your sidekick"
Ambrosius refuses to even think about the effect the Director has on him. He's insisting on Nimona being the manipulator despite him being manipulated
Finally, when Ambrosius realizes something is CLEARLY wrong, he still tries to talk some sense into her
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"But what if we're wrong? What if we've always been wrong?"
Despite him being a constant witness to Director's misdeeds he tries to do everything peacefully. Look at his face. This is a face of a man who doesn't want to harm. He gives the Director a chance to improve herself. I think he would forgive her after everything she's done
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...but being a conservative she'd rather explode than admit she's wrong. So she attempts to kill Ambrosius again
This, again, says that no matter how much mercy you show to hateful people, they'll continue to be horrible to you. Just because they think they have a right to
Analysing Ambrosius's and the Director's relationship I think it'd be more than valid to state that she has, indeed, groomed Ambrosius to exploit and use him for her own (political and other) benefits. Other knights were brainwashed and groomed too, but something about her attitude towards Ambrosius really bugged me the wrong way
She is an excellent manipulator and Ambrosius fell victim to that, which is no surprise
Thank you for reading this! It took so long to make😭 If you want to add on anything in the reblogs please do, because the discussion HAS to happen at some point
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yanderes-galore · 7 months ago
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so happy that funger requests are open!!! i've been thinking... Marina x Yellow Mage!Darling? like a darling that is a figure kind of similar to O'saa... this knowledgeable, dismissive, powerful mage from a foreign (to Marina at least lol) land that has that yellow mage philosophy of not following or wanting to serve any gods and dedicating your life to sorcery and self improvement and isn't afraid to laugh at other people lol. I remember they had this sort of dynamic in the game of O'saa kind of seeing potential in her but not really being interested in teaching while Marina wanted to learn more about occult stuff from him... would be cool to see a darling like that!! thank you
I'll try my best to make this lore accurate :) As you suggested in another ask, this is a timeline where you both survive the Termina Festival.
Yandere! Marina Concept
Yandere! Marina with Yellow Mage! Darling
(Ending B Timeline)
Pairing: Platonic -> Romantic
Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Religion, You end up enabling Marina, Stalking, Jealousy, Possessive behavior, Violence, Blood, Murder, Isolation, Kidnapping, Dubious companionship/relationship.
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Yellow Mages, according to lore, are mysterious mages who worship and use the blood magic of the Old God Gro-goroth.
However, these people do not devote themselves to worship like other priests... they use their knowledge to benefit their own agendas.
Yellow Mages embrace chaos and aren't concerned with worship, which is already something different than Marina's religion who conduct rituals to appease the Old Gods.
Yellow Mages often expect each other to pursue their own selfish desires, including their apprentices.
Which already gives me ideas....
They seek knowledge of the otherworldly... which is no doubt what brought you to the Termina Festival in the first place.
You meet Marina on the train and you're no doubt the most knowledgeable of the events going on due to your pursuit for knowledge.
You're simply using the festival to fuel your own interests, peering into any sort of information you can.
Marina, being as curious as she is, no doubt finds herself drawn to you.
She's also connected with the occult despite your differences and knows the area well.
You two no doubt speak due to the vast knowledge you both have of blood magic.
I have a feeling this would be a case where the obsession uses the yandere to their advantage.
Due to the selfish behavior of Yellow Mages along with the fact Marina has such an interest in you... you may use her to help yourself.
In fact, I like to think you take her in as an "apprentice" almost due to the fact she follows you so closely.
She, like you, is aware of the dangers this festival holds.
It's occult in nature and as she travels with you... she begins to wonder about your motives.
Her curiosity is what sucks her deeper into her obsession.
For the most part I think her feelings would be similar to her original concept.
Except this time... it isn't just Rher's influence that corrupts her.
It's yours.
As Marina chooses to help you through the festival and learn more about you, she picks up on your beliefs.
She notices you can be cold at times, ambitious, yet very knowledgeable about the Old Gods.
Marina often asks you about certain knowledge as you journey together, wanting to know more.
Even more so if you said something about Marina's church worshiping a darker God similar to O'saa.
You often want to explore and even give some of your own knowledge to Marina.
Your goals may be selfish, yet you treat Marina like some sort of student.
In fact, you may encourage her to give into more... selfish beliefs.
Which is no doubt where things go downhill... all due to you.
The funny thing is, you may not even care as a Yellow Mage.
No, actually, you may see Marina's descent into obsession amusing.
After all, Yellow Mages embrace chaos.
You may even praise her for pursuing things for her own selfish interest.
A Yellow Mage obsession wouldn't be scared upon seeing Marina kill someone for you.
For example, Samarie is most likely her first kill, and when she's done stabbing the dagger... you praise her.
Marina isn't sure how to feel when she looks up at you from her knees, blood covering her blouse and dress.
Her hands are shaking as she drops the blood covered dagger, the crimson leaking into the floor.
Yet you don't abandon her... you tell her she did the right thing.
Be you aware of her obsession or not, you ask her if she did it for her own desires.
When Marina answers with a shaky yes, you nod.
"Then that's all that matters... you're doing well."
Cue Marina realizing she can kill for you or do anything for you along with getting away with it.
Honestly, a Yellow Mage obsession may just make her worse.
Even the party members you have are terrified due to the fact Marina has not only lost it... but you're saying it's fine.
The only member that wouldn't be bothered is if you had O'saa, who completely understands your motives.
By the time you fight Rher, Marina is completely devoted to you.
By this point she's killed for you and clings to you like a lifeline.
She's learned many things from you and appreciates your knowledge.
After your big battle, Marina plans to settle down with you in Valland.
She wants to use her occult skills for a living, to help you.
The unfortunate thing is Yellow Mages like to travel for knowledge.
By the time you defeat Rher, Marina is adamant you settle down with her.
She's tired of having to share you.
Your remaining party members were probably even dealt with by her after the fight.
She doesn't want you to have any more contact with them.
Marina's possessive behavior is amusing to you.
You ask her what she plans to do if you don't settle with her.
You see Marina's gaze darken as she clings to you, blood staining the yellow robes you wear.
"I'll force you to stay with me, to love me, if I have to. You and I belong together after this! I'll find a good home, we'll live together, I'll trap you with me if it makes you love me!"
Her pledge surprises you... yet you find pleasure in it.
She has learned a lot from you.
She's learned to take what she wants.
As a result, you may even choose to give in.
You allow her to take you to Valland, you allow her to find you a home.
You don't care if she puts you in chains or not.
You allow her to pepper you in kisses, to cuddle you tightly.
You allow her to have you in whatever way she wishes.
Meanwhile she finds resources to help you learn.
She helps you... all while you make her worse.
You could leave, you could fight...
But her chaos makes you feel alive.
You want to feed such chaos...
You may even find being with her worth it just to watch.
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riddle-rosethorns · 8 months ago
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Name: Ismund Kolbeck Pronouns: he/him Orientation: Gay Based on: Elsa (Frozen) Dorm: Pomefiore
Introducing Ismund! I think he's the first OC I've posted here (and also my 1000th post to this blog! Yippee!) and honestly I'm really proud of how his ref sheet looks. Feel free to ask me questions about him, I really love infodumping to anyone who'll listen lol. I'm still working out a concrete character arc for him in my brain, but I can gladly share my concept for it once it's finished baking.
More info under the cut!
Grade/Class: Sophomore/Class E (No. 12) Birthday: December 22 (Capricorn) Age: 17 Height: 180 cm Dominant Hand: Left Homeland: Shaftlands Club: Mountain Lover Club Best Subject: Practical Magic Hobbies: Skiing Pet Peeves: Being treated differently due to his status Favorite Food: Chocolate Least Favorite Food: Anything spicy Talent: Singing
Ismund was born on the winter solstice to the king and queen of a small kingdom in the frozen north of the Shaftlands. The two were not mages but Ismund was blessed by an ice fae at birth, granting him powerful elemental magic. His parents' unfamiliarity with the practice of magic meant that Ismund was not given proper training as a child and his powers quickly grew out of control. This resulted in an incident during which his younger brother, Aksel, was seriously injured.
Following this incident, Ismund was forbidden from practicing magic and forced to conceal his powers from the kingdom's subjects. Aksel still knows about his brother's magic, but was too young to remember the specifics of the incident. All he knows is that it gave him the white streak in his hair and magic of his own, though his is closer to that of a standard mage in terms of power. Ismund still blames himself for hurting Aksel, however, and distances himself from his brother as much as possible to keep it from happening again.
Once he was of age, Ismund was summoned to Night Raven College to learn to better control his magic. Even still, he never leaves his dorm room without gloves on- something that has been instilled in him by his father ever since the incident. Most other students only know him by his cold demeanor and icy stare, as he keeps his distance from his peers to avoid hurting them the way he did Aksel. Ismund is also very secretive about his identity as a prince and soon-to-be king, not wanting his classmates to treat him differently due to his status as royalty.
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nonokoko13 · 1 year ago
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SPOILERS SXF CHAPTER 93 ❗❗❗
So, chapter 93. Starting with Anya scores...
THAT'S MY GIRL!!!! CONGRATULATIONS BABY!!! 🎉🎊🥳
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(Let's take a moment to appreciate what a good and supportive friend Becky is too 💖)
As I expected Anya passed classical language (with a huge improvement!) but in the large, tedious walk on Hell that is school not everyone can get exceptional grades in every subject unless you're a Desmond apparently and Anya, as many people who preceded her and will come after her, failed math.
I have seen many people make theories about how certain older student who we shall discuss next could be her tutor. However, my theory is that she will receive help from Bill in the future
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It makes more sense: both already know each other, Anya has more chances of Bill accepting or suggesting to help her than the-one-I-shall-name-later and overall Bill seems more communicative and better at socialising and explaining himself. Let's not forget he received a stella in math after all. So for me Bill seems like the most plausible option (maybe we will get jealous Damian with this friendship?)
Back at the Forgers residence the Authens pay a visit to congratulate Anya as well. When I read Sigmund's sentence about how rewarding is to have a payment for your hard work my mind automatically thought "But sometimes no matter how hard you try you don't get a reward. Sometimes the result is just not worth the effort" (I think many people has a canon event that reveals them that, specially when you're in highschool, middle school or college)
And right after thinking that he agreed with me lol. My mind really anticipates things before finishing a panel
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Speaking of hard work and grades, I'm taking this chance to give my opinion: a system based on giving stars to those who have the highest grades while those who fail face the possibility of being expelled is awful. Not getting a star and comparing yourself to your peers already make horrors to your self esteem, imagine a child getting expelled for repeatedly fail a exam that may not be adapted to their needs (or getting many tonitrus for things your teachers disapprove of you but you didn't know it was wrong or for something about yourself you cannot control. For example a kid with ADHD unintentionally interrupting someone, disconnecting in the middle of a conversation or making noise with their leg when they stay still for too long. No need to go as far as talking about neurodivergent kids, look at that chapter where Anya got a tonitrus for not having a handkerchief. Who the fuck is punished for that when you're an adult anyway)
Enough of that, back to the chapter. Let's talk about what hyped me the most: Demetrius finally appearing on screen!
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We already had crumbs of him before. Given Damian inferiority complex when comparing himself to him when he had talked about school and Twilight noticing his exams barely had any mistakes back in the chapter where Daybreak was welcomed to this world, him being a exceptional student when it comes to academics isn't surprising in the least.
Many say he's ugly and exactly like his father but I disagree. Donovan looks like a goddamn Frankenstein if Frankenstein was ugly, Demetrius take after his dead eyes look but he's pretty like Melinda. Not conventionally pretty like Damian or Melinda but kinda pretty. Like a zombie with sleep deprivation but in an endearing way. It's not his fault he's built like a Tim Burton or Don't Starve Together character... anyway I'm sure his appearance can grow up on you, hopefully (;´ ▾ `)
About the theories regarding this panel
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It may be true something's going on, maybe he was really experimented on... But I can't stop thinking he was in that very moment "No thoughts, head empty" mode
I mean, he looks like a walking corpse in dire need of a proper nap, can you blame him if his thoughts are mainly focused on studies when Donovan probably spent time with him only for the sake of producing a good grades, not independent thinking machine as his heir? "He watch him study all the time."
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I don't think it was necessary for a tragic incident to change Donovan and made him distant from his family. I suspect he has always been like that, perhaps even before having Demetrius, so it was less a traumatic big event and more the exhausting everyday life Demetrius has been having as far as he remembers of being supervised by his father in order to be the best at school and everything that turned him into the probably burnt out teenager he is.
Same with Melinda, being married to somebody you might not have even loved when you first got together, a man who doesn't try to understand others or seem capable of caring for anyone, a man who is not precisely publicly known for his kindness (remember Millie and Yor's boss when Donovan was brought up?)... Being married to that kind of person for years and then having kids with that person and have to keep being related to them for at least until your kids graduate sound like a miserable life indeed
The Desmond have a common theme going around that is understanding the world around them, or rather the lack of it. I can say for sure that Demetrius feeling overwhelmed simply with a bunch of kids and thinking he can't understand people have its roots in Donovan
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• For Donovan is his narrow minded belief that nobody can't understand — therefore neither trust — each other because people is different; and as long as that phrase of "two people can't think the same" lives to the reality it finds itself in reaching a common ground is impossible.
• Donovan influenced Demetrius. Perhaps Demetrius doesn't share his father belief and that's not why he can't understand others, maybe it is because he was possibly deprived of a normal childhood where he could socialise with others of his age without his father expectations onto him.
Many academic gifted children reach a part of their lives where their habit is to think inside the box of "Good grades is all I'm good at or all I should care about; good grades = doing fine; it's all about what you can prove to those who expect something from you, not what you can prove to yourself to make you feel satisfied and happy".
When people who raised you condition you to act, live and think the way they wanted you to do is difficult to break and separate yourself from that. Plus he's going through the middle school phase, from personal experience that makes you x10 times angsty and complicated to understand yourself, much less everyone else.
• With Damian it is less discussed and pointed out because he's been able to have a relatively normal —if anything very neglected — childhood up to this point. He has friends, he acts like a kid of his age, his life doesn't revolve around his grades all the time... But that's the bare minimum of what a good childhood should be like.
It may be because of his age, but he doesn't see the bigger picture of his family. He can't see what is wrong with them (yet) because in his eyes nothing is wrong. Sure, he feels lonely and works hard for his dad to notice him, but that happens in many families right? He's not even in denial, he doesn't phantom the idea that what his family is, how they behave towards each other or towards him, isn't normal.
Don't make me start with how his future plans is following Donovan's footsteps in politics because he's trying that hard to approach him. He works hard at school because in his mind being like Demetrius or how he believes Donovan wants him to be would bring them closer, receive an understanding relationship from his dad when we know there might not be genuine affection between them from Donovan's side to start with.
He's teaching himself that love is conditioned by your "worth" or by whether you get to the expectations your loved ones have. That reminds me of what Sigmund told Anya because it sounds like a foretelling of Damian's life: [...] And one day you'll experience the frustration of realizing that hard work is not always rewarded. He doesn't many things and his age may explain it but it doesn't justify, if he continues thinking like that he'll have his hopes crushed and may turn out like Demetrius.
• As for Melinda, is difficult to talk about the point she stands in the understanding theme. Unlike her family she does seem able to understand people, perhaps because she wasn't raised like her kids have been. She's aware that her husband party made a lot of damage to their country, she seems aware and attentive to what surrounds her.
I don't think she cannot be understanding or perceptive, I think it's the other way around: the people she's surrounded by cannot understand her. Neither Yor, Anya, Damian, surely Demetrius and Donovan neither, her "friends" of the association she's in... Not even us can't understand the reason why she's so conflictive about Damian yet.
In just one appearance Donovan made his belief clear, thus giving us an idea of what type of feelings he has towards Damian. We can get so much of his character as a person with one chapter, but Melinda has appeared more than him and her true self is unknown. Donovan is reserved in a physical way, he isolates himself by not going outside and socialising, but he's not against the idea of explaining a stranger his stance in life. Melinda surrounds herself of people and listens to them but she keeps to herself.
Anyway, I'm looking forward to see more of Demetrius and the Desmonds. Hope we get more screen time of them, unless Endo has decided to drop such episode only to give us a one-shot chapter next and not elaborate further before introducing a complete different arc 💦
Although with what we have I'm already bought and entertained enough. Our favorite family is great but hooray for secondary characters being given depth and spotlight in this manga 🥳
See you next chapter reaction! If I made another one after other 25 full moons. I'm probably forgetting to talk about something...Oh well
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