#my monday just improved
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So today's bowling was just another practice (not for a grade, sadly) BUT...
Fuckin Check It. I got a 135.
Slower start bc today's practice was over footwork, & when I was focusing on the steps I wasn't able to control the trajectory as well. But you can see where it just Clicks for me, and then I managed to get a fuckin. 135.
If I can do at Least this well on Monday, then that's like. A fucking Massive improvement. Considering my two graded games were 81 and 68, this is OVER 50 points more than my prior best score.
Already blew my 100 points goal out of the water. At this rate, I'm gonna need a 200 points goal or something.
#speculation nation#like by the end of the semester. honestly? if i keep improving like this then i really just might manage it.#im honestly astounded by how high my score is. turns out good technique really does do a lot.#i wanted to go in for the free bowling time today but i ended up needing to stay for the full lab time#and also my leg is sore :p kinda bad enough for me to limp lol. i think it's combination fast walking a lot and then bowling strain#doesnt feel injured tho. just a very sore muscle.#so im just gonna go home and then rest my leg. and ill be back and stronger than ever on monday >:]]]
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i had swimmers ear for a week, but its been another week and my hearing is still not fully back yet ?? i thought it was wax buildup, but i dont think so anymore. the local doctors r too busy to take walk-ins and they dont answer my calls. im soo tired, i just want this to be over with !!!!!
#if by monday i dont see even a slight improvement#ill ask my mum to take me to another doctor#theres one thats a 15min drive away#we just havent gone bc of transport problems#like the local one is literally a 5 minute walk#shakes ur shoulders. im going crazy#tomfoolery!
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chapter closed🥹
#shut up j#just back to my car after my last day in my job!! Starting the new one Monday 😭#drawers cleared out. desk removed of all my crap. everything is GAWN#handovers sent!!!! files sorted!!!!! goodbyes done!!!!!!!!!!!!!#VERY SURREAL FEELING ACTUALLY#hopefully onwards & upwards to improved mental health & doing a job that fits me better as a person <3#manifest it with me pls and thanks x
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poäng appreciation post 💛
#i forget if i said but Baby Sister and i stopped off at ikea on the way back from picking her up at the bus stop on monday#and finally replaced the ruined-by-a-succession-of-cats-(in-ways-both-unsightly-and-gross) Accent Chair in the living room#with a poäng rocker (bc the shape is a little more interesting and less instantly recognizable than the regular chair) in birch (my beloved#also they make fancy tufted cushions for it now! wish they came in more colors but it's a real improvement on sad options past#and anyway it's like. now you can actually sit here in the morning and look out the window at the extremely beautiful view#and the chair actually supports you??? like i could see down the road trying to work out some kind of custom cushioning that's thicker#but the shape of the frame is so ergonomic for me that it's genuinely quite comfortable regardless. bentwood exocorset…#anyway. not a very original post but i just DO really love ikea#like yes it's a mixed bag but also honestly if you're buying particle board—#(i was going to say 'and expecting it to hold up' but. honestly i think it's just. if you're buying particle board period)#—that might be on you.#(like. if you're being pressed in from all sides by budget constraints and immediate need and no accessible better-made used alternatives—#obviously you do what you have to. but it's like buying pleather—you know‚ or should‚ that the material is going to disintegrate.)#but the things ikea makes with decent materials are remarkably well-designed and affordable for what they are‚ has been my sense?#you just gotta shop carefully but like. that's true literally everywhere.#anyway. in conclusion i love my new buddy with its clean lines. …do people name chairs ever.#i've never before had the urge but this one feels like a little assembly-line friend that deserves its own identity. like a star wars clone#(lol what if i gave it a little nametag somewhere hidden. secret identity talisman 4 chairpal.)#(& yes i promise i'm as aware of the‚ uh‚ itself-ness of this tag spiral as you are. :) )#domesticities
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Being a fan of dropout means being in love and deeply impressed with like 20 different people
#these guys have just completely changed what improv means to me#it’s all so crazy impressive to me#of course you have BLeeM#and all of D20 is amazing and insane#I just don’t have the time/ attention span for that kind of show right now#game changer and make some noise have been literally keeping me alive the past couple months#and shit like play it by ear and the Shakespeare episode are so cool to me#and I’m in love Vic and love vip#all this to say#where my game changer ep?#I’ve been a very good girl all week I need my game changer#how am I supposed to get through a Monday not looking forward to game changer all day#I only found out today that they finale got delayed
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both my mom and my sister really need to contact hospitals rn and it’s stressing me outttt
#in mom’s case it might be something chronic like she was at risk for arthritis#but she doesn’t want to call because she ‘should have improved her insurance first’ and…I get it but it’s already too late to get ‘better#insurance’ for this since she’s got one meeting with a rheumatism doctor in her log#she won’t get better insurance and it’s just getting worse…quickly#in my sister’s case she’s had some kind of clearly very distressing pain since Monday night#in the lower part of her tongue and now she’s saying it’s spreading backwards in her mouth but she won’t call 1177 because ‘it’s too tiring’#they’re both stressing me out !!!!! please just go to the hospital before it gets worse jfc#rant#I get they don’t want to spend a lot of money on meds or end up getting expensive treatments but…if it’s actually serious stuff they’re#gonna end up paying anyway :/#in my sisters case she shouldn’t even have to worry about costs I think she’ll at most end up paying like 100€…which is a lot of money but#globally? for health care? :/ not really#she just doesn’t want to call and sit in the phone queue… but she’s also too distracted by the pain t eat comfortably and discuss what we#should do…idk
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my sisters cat had to be put to sleep today and it was awful. :-( she is 4 1/2 and had severe liver problems develop pretty suddenly... they're going to do an autopsy for her and try and see what happened. our vet is so amazing and isn't charging us for the autopsy. really happy she was there for giz and for the other pets we have had to have put to sleep there.
#pet death /#animals are so so so so sad to see go :-(#and i have to go work with the dogs and cats again now#and im so sad#and it makes me miss my baby bear#i hate how every death makes me think of his and miss him so so bad#and gizmo was improving monday but this morning she started to go downhill fast#she was so tiny and dehydrated and she didnteven purr. just tiny mows
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You'd think that I, "therapist approved pouf kinnie", would have a lot more art of meruem, alas,
#he's just such a pain in the ass to draw jdhdkdkd he's got so many little details.. that's why he's always minimalistic in my art lmao#i mean the only way to improve is to keep trying and all im saying is. meruem mondays 👀#i do have a silly idea i wanna execute hopefully today though lmao#hoatm rants
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I wrote so many words last night im worried if I'll be able to do it again
#i say so many it was like 400#i did just crank them out super fast tho it was great#but thats because it was all establishing paragraphs i can explain facts pretty quickly#but now i need to THINK and i dont know ehat my thoughts on this really are yet#well i think i do maybe#enough that i could argue for it probably#but i need to write like a thousand more words and its due monday morning#so i have like tonight and tomorrow to finish it#WAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#ill be fine tho if i can be equally productive as i was last night tonight then ill basically be done today and then i can just edit#id love to get the rough ideas of the body paragraphs done tonight so tomorrow is just intro conclusion and improvements#like i already know i need to split a paragraph and make it flow better and i need to add to another#but first SAY IDEAS *THEN* make improvements
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I fucked up
but it’s okay
#it’s only Monday and my stress levels are very stress#1) still haven’t submitted assignment that was due last Thursday#plan on getting that turned in by midnight today#just have to edit it#2) meeting with boss on wednesday#stressful bc I now have to prove my dedication/worth to my boss#all bc of a series of miscommunications#it’s also weird because like idk#the reason I’m ‘behind’ is bc I waited for her to have time to show me how processing works#cause I’ve never done it before#and she didn’t really explain to me that I needed to jump in and figure it out myself#so I spent last month watching webinars and reading archive articles#and occasionally looking at/going through the collection I picked#now that I know this is basically a self guided internship#which is ironic since she’s been like now that you have a mentor#and our schedules do not work well together#she told me last week I improved#and she just needs to keep seeing that#basically as long as I’m learning something related to local history or genealogy or archives#it’s all good#and that is what I’m doing#but she told me children’s services might be a better fit and at the time I was like too shaken to really think it through#my confidence has returned tho and 100% im going to stick with archives
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Hey @staff I have a suggestion!
When a device uses dark mode or a color palette with a darker background like "classic low contrast", the main text is all changed from black to white to increase contrast and readability, right?
However, when it comes to colored text (like this) some colors are very close in value to the background so it gets very difficult to read them.
My suggestion is to change especially the purple text color to a lighter shade in the dark palettes so it stands out against the dark gray.
I believe it also would be beneficial to check if other themes have unreadable colors like this one and adjust them accordingly.
#it is also a bigger issue for users with vision problems that make it hard to read text with such a low contrast like this#so adjusting these colors would also improve tumblr's acessibility#i can tell the lilac i choose to illustrate my point may be a little too close to the pink we already have#which may make them hard to distinguish#so maybe another color but just as light#suggestions#tumblr#colored text#tumblr staff#will staff even see this tho#the wip staff blog opens their inbox at mondays i think so next week i'll see if i drop this at them as well#acessibility
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I keep practicing proper bowling form as I wander around my apartment. Trying to cement the steps pattern in my brain. I wanna go bowling again so bad. Free bowling period is so long tomorrow (4 hours instead of the 1 or 2 hours on other days!!) so I am so tempted by it
But my audition video for seat placement is due on Tuesday, so I need to practice for that over the weekend. So as much as I really wanna go bowling, my energy would be better spent on violin...
For now. No promises for next weekend though.
#speculation nation#im also like. i already increased my score by a whopping 54 points. i shouldn't increase it Even More just yet.#capture that 135 in the official game on monday. so that improvement will reflect in subsequent games#as a steadier increase. rather than me suddenly getting just REALLY fucking good.#there will be more time for practicing later. for now i guess i will keep miming throwing a bowling ball in my apartment.#it's ok i live alone. theres no one around to judge me lmao
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hr being like "we're calling in 15 mins" but it being something mundane and they're not laying you off....the adrenaline in my body lmao
#i have no reason to think they would lay me off my boss just gave me good feedback on monday lol#she said she could see improvements taking shape in my organization and account management strategies#which was great to hear bc i spent 8 hours the prior week focusing on that
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#amazing how carting myself to a ramen place suddenly improves the mood#miscellaneous#okay my goal after is to write a bit and finally update some playlists#and drink a nice chai latte in the cafe lmao#and then I’m debating if I want to do the Monday night meetup…#like I already have plans for later in the night#idk I’m just all over the place - I’ll decide tomorrow#*repeats like a mantra* next fall I’ll have a cat …
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Texted my therapist back yesterday mid-day to check in about an appointment again. She said she got a temporary space for in person visits but asked if I wanted to still do telehealth on the day I originally requested. I said I still needed the telehealth because that’s the only day I have off the rest of the month and could switch back to in person in November. Have not received a confirmation.
#i’m trying to be patient i’m trying to be understanding i know things are weird and difficult for everyone right now#but like what do i do now?#text tomorrow to confirm in hopes of putting this particular anxiety to rest even though it’s the weekend and that feels rude and pushy???#text on monday to be more considerate but stew in my anxiety over it all weekend???#CALL??????#i know this sounds ridiculous why be this worked up just keep asking until it’s scheduled#but you see i went into this whole disaster getting guilted for being a burden#for simply throwing out the idea that my parents might need to come up and get the cats if the water/power situation didn’t improve#because that would mean my parents would have to postpone their anniversary trip#i’m sorry for expressing worry about how to keep my pets safe i know that was selfish#yeah i know my brother shouldn’t have to do it either because he has work and just doesn’t like driving#yeah i know i can’t leave either because what if i run out of gas#(it’s less than 200 miles to home and i had a full tank so this was literally impossible even with the road closures at the time)#(my suggesting that we even meet halfway in greenville to do a hand-off was denied as well)#see this is why i need the appointment#because i’m trying to process the reality that no one will be there for me even in an emergency#but i know i’ve been lucky through it all and others have lost their homes and their lives here#so actually i don’t really deserve the appointment and should just get over it
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i don’t want to jinx it but i think the flareup might actually be over :D
#i’ve felt better the past few days#obviously i don’t feel *good* lol that never happens but i don’t feel like throwing up and dying#which is definitely an improvement#it could be the emotional weight lifted off me since i finally told my mom everything that was going on with me health wise#it was scary and idk yet if im glad that i did but it’s definitely a relief to not be hiding it (as much) anymore#to be fair after last monday’s episode it was kinda hard to keep up the illusion that i was healthy 😅#anyways here’s hoping that the flare up is over and that i don’t have an episode tomorrow#because this has been the worst flare up so far it’s really taken a toll on me#and it’s lasted like two months#usually they only last like two weeks#ugh#it’s been awful i’m not gonna lie#my mental health isn’t pretty right now tbh#but i’m staying whimsical despite the horrors#my friends are having some struggles so im staying strong for them#hopefully these next few weeks (months? 🤞) will be better#plus drama is starting!!!!!!! i’m really excited for the show we’re doing it’s going to be so fun#and i’m going to have something to do with my time other than sit around in pain and falling asleep#i do hope the stress of drama doesn’t set me back again though 😬#anyways we’re not going to worry about that right now#praise be to god for helping me out of this even if it’s just briefly :]#being functional feels great#hope y’all are having a good month!!! <3
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