#my math teacher in grade 6-9 (who was the best teacher i ever had) always made a thing of pi day if we had math class that day :)
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#amphibian#salamander#amphibidextrous#happy pi day :D#i made a key lime pie but i forgot it has to cool down so i will not be eating pie today#i love pi day because i am secretly a math nerd#also i just think its fun to be excited and have a little treat for any reason#my math teacher in grade 6-9 (who was the best teacher i ever had) always made a thing of pi day if we had math class that day :)#we would bring cookies/cakes/etc anything you wanna as long as its round and calculate their volumes and stuff#and then everyone got to eat the circular treats while doing circle math :)#as in like any math at an appropriate level that uses pi
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soo i literally suck in every area of my life.
ive said in 3 different parts of my life that, “i’ll do better” and “im sorry” like 10 times. i’ll do better. i’ll do better. i’ll do better. i’ll do better. i’ll do better. its like the words wont leave my head.
my family, who barely sees me because im always hanging out because i hate them, say they miss me and need me at home. ok, im sorry, i’ll be at home more. i’ll do better. yes im at home more but now i have attitude. wow i wonder why you fucking assholes, i literally cant stand you and you’re the rudest, narcissistic, transphobic/homophobic, oblivious people ive ever be around. but fine. i’ll shut my mouth and my attitude. i’ll do better.
my boyfriend, who i love dearly, thinks hes not enough for me. hes saying stuff like ‘why arent i enough for you to pay attention to me?’ and more stuff mentioning when i accidentally ignored him or when im on my phone too much (which is a genuine problem because ive become connected to my phone with the previous reason being anxiety, and now its just an addiction), or times where it isnt my fault and someone interrupts a conversation between me and him and just starts yapping but i cant shut them up like they’re a machine or when hes standing behind us and im not directly looking or talking at him?? i suggested coming to the side of me instead of behind but that was wrong of me i guess. but whatever, i’ll do better, im sorry. no but im apparently not listening to what hes saying, im telling him to fix things instead of listening, im reading his words but not listening. what the fuck else do you want me to do? shut everyone out of my life? i would happily do so but thats not fucking socially acceptable. but still, im saying i’ll do better so why dont you believe me? im not a liar. i stopped being a pathological liar years ago for people i love, because i didnt want to hurt them. im crying, having a panic attack on top of anxiety and nausea and shaking from medication im having a panic attack. im sorry. im fucking sorry. i cant do better can i? i dont know but i know that im trying really hard, and he wont believe me. but all i keep saying is, and all ive been saying since we’ve been friends is, i’ll do better. (and honestly im sorry i cant let go of things, im sorry i hold grudges, im sorry everything you say or do affects me. i am really sorry.)
My school. im failing 2 classes. never in my life had i ever been failing a single class, never mind 2, im killing myself because of it. they’re both advanced classes too. my math teaches emails my mom (even though im not failing) saying shes worried im disconnected in class and not following the coursework. yeah, maybe thats because im doing a sport at 6 am and have to be up at 5, and i dont get home most nights until 9-10 pm. my ap world teacher doesnt gaf, ive been doing ok on my quizzes since i started doing my homework again instead of literally stealing my friends hw from that class to show to him. i think i failed the test though, i dont remember. my chem si teacher emailed my mom about me failing and being disconnected and not paying attention during class. thanks for letting her know that im failing dawg i didnt need her knowing that. i was gonna bring the grades up but wtv. i fucking failed the last test and passed the test before that by 3 points. he said we havent even reached the honors level work yet and im failing. fuck you. im not doing my hw and im zoning out during class. i dont want to be like this, im usually good. im a good kid. i’m supposed to be. im always in honors for report cards. always. i always have at LEAST an 85 in my classes, but im struggling with a 54 in chem, a 61 in ap world, and 73 in math. like what if i kill myself. the one thing i was semi-good at. theres always gonna be people better than me in every field of work. school, art, makeup, fashion, sports, everything i like theres always someone better. i know its impossible to be the best, but cant i at least be good? i wish i could do better.
i love my life, but no i dont. hence the reason im suicidal :))))))
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1. My relationship with money is not that bad if I’m being honest, when I want to save up for something that I really want I don’t waste my money on anything else. Based of this, I would not consider myself a “bad person when controlling money”.
2.I have unwavering faith in that if you really propose yourself to something nothing or nobody else should stop you from achieving that.
3.I think what makes a great nation is when people trust each other and live in peace.
4.Yes, I tend to make the best of a bad situation, but personally im a person who is really sentimental so every little thing gets to me but with given time I do try to learn from my mistakes and improve from these bad situations.
5.College is really important to me. Ever since I was little, my mom would always talk about how she wants us to go to college and have a career, because she was not given the opportunity. And I would like to make that wish come true and do it for her.
6.I actually don’t have a favorite poem, im not the type who loves reading if I’m being honest, the only way I read is if I’m in my ap literature class😂 ever since i was little I was always on the math side instead of english.
7.I don’t think anyone has ever been angry because of me being honest, probably just my sister, but it is understandable from my part, because she always dislikes when I disagree with her.
8.At the moment I will say I do have the support I need from my family, teachers, coach’s and friends too.
9.I think the trait I wish I had was being better in English because I always have ideas in my brain I just never know how to bring it out and speak of it. I think that is something very useful right now considering that I am a senior and I have a lot of projects and essays to complete at this grade.
10.My least favorite music genre is rapping. Personally I don’t know why but spanish music gets to me more, I think it is more sentimental giving a lot of feelings, and that’s what I love to listen to.
11.No, I do not judge people easily I think anybody can look one way in person but can be going through so much at the same time. And I also think anybody can be what they want for example if they have different hairstyles, tattoos, hair color, I think everybody should live comfortably on their own ways because we all deserve that right to and for that reason I don’t judge people.
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I Was Never Good at Waiting (Sugawara X Reader) Chapter 6
- It was your last year in highschool, everything had been going smoothly until you got assigned the new teacher. Sugawara Koushi was handsome, maybe too handsome for his own good. Be he wasn't flirting with you right, teachers shouldn't do that....I guess we will see where this year goes.
Word Count - 5,459
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It had been a few weeks since you last spoke to Sugawara. You weren’t really sure what words to say to him at this point. Sure you were still mad, he was after all a huge ass for talking to you the way he did. But you couldn’t help but feel bad for your actions as well. For all you knew, the sweet glances, the soft smiles, the entrancing conversations. Well maybe you had exaggerated his intentions a little. Maybe he was just uncomfortable, stuck in a situation he didn’t know how to escape. But god dammit, you were not going to ask him for help with your math homework.
Your grade had tanked in the last few weeks. You did the work, put in all the motions. But your brain just wasn’t soaking up the sweet, sweet academic knowledge. This was the reason Oikawa was stationed at your dining room table, looking through your math book just as confused as you had moments before.
You had tried to call Iwaizumi for the extra help instead, but he was on a romantic getaway with his significant other. “Call Tooru-sensei F/N, you know he would come if you asked.” Iwaizumi was clearly not interested in helping you, even if he was home you would have been out of luck.
“But you were the one who tutored him in school Hajime. Do you really think he's gonna be any help to me?” You groaned in response.
He knew you had a point. The boy’s brain only operated on three levels, volleyball, girls, and a very small sliver, an absolutely miniscule piece, was dedicated to harassing you.“Figure it out F/N, I'll see you at the spring tournament ok?” Iwaizumi tried his best to understand your situation, but that didn’t mean he wanted to actively continue this conversation.
“Ok Hajime.” Your voice was soft, not wanting to press the matter further. You listened as the line died, your only hope fading out with it.
Now that you thought about it, you might feel worse for Oikawa at the moment. He was clearly about to blow a gasket trying to figure out where the X went in your problem. “This one has a typo, let's skip ahead.”
You rolled your eyes as he turned to the next page of your book. “Senpai, you’ve said that about the last five problems.”You were getting annoyed now. He had skipped over almost every problem you attempted so far. These were only the warmup questions, what would happen when he got to the actual work?
He looked up, frowning at your displeased tone.“Well maybe they should have checked over the book better.” He shrugged slightly, lowering his shoulders in defeat.
This man was no help.
“Snacks incoming!” Your mom smiled, leaning over the table to set down the plate in her hand.
She had come home for the weekend with your grandfather to check in on you. They would make the trip maybe once a month just to make sure you were well stocked on food and the bills were getting paid. She had been pleasantly surprised to find Oikawa with you when she returned home from shopping. Giddy to dot on the boy while she had the chance.
She loved him, and always had. She thought of you two as inseparable, even now when his job took him across the ocean. Wherever you went, he was never hard to find. Whether it be phone calls, strange gifts that reminded him of you, or even visiting whenever he had the free time. She knew he would always be near. That was one reason she agreed to let you stay home while she was in Tokyo. Even when she was gone, you were safe with him. He would do anything for you, that was perfectly clear.
“Tooru don’t work so hard honey.” She cooed, rubbing small circles into his back.
“Mom, what about me? It's my homework.” You whined at the lack of attention, pulling the book from Oikawa’s hands.
Wiggling a finger your way she shook her head. “You need to work harder! You're failing the class, not him.” She frowned your way as you sank into your chair.
You felt defeated. Between your useless cousin, the single brain cell Oikawa had, and your grumpy mother it was inevitable. You slapped your hands together, bowing your head in prayer. “I know we don’t talk often, but please don’t make me have to ask Sugawara-sensei for help on Monday. Kill me instead, anything but talking to him.”
“F/N, don’t start praying! I’ll figure it out! I’m sure I can find the X...” He pulled the book from your hands, frantically flipping through the pages.
The weekend came to an end, and you were in no better shape for your class. Your mother and grandfather had left Sunday night to return to Tokyo, the trip home ending far too soon.
“F/N, make sure you water the garden once a day ok, and don’t stay up all night playing video games. That animal island game can wait, Pudge, that's his name right? Well he can wait for your homework to be done, and please stop eating spicy ramen for every meal. Your tummy is gonna hurt.” She rambled on as she checked that all the bags were lined up at the train station stop. She looked back up at you, letting out an exaggerated sigh. She grabbed the sides of your open coat, pulling it together roughly as she zipped it up to your chin. “And wear your coat properly, you’ll catch cold like that!”
The train rumbled into the station, easing to a stop at the yellow lines in front of you and your family. The doors slid open, a small rush of passengers exiting as they continued on their ways.
“Ok mom, bye love you!” You hugged her tightly before spinning her around. You gave her a light push as she grabbed her bags, walking her to the open doors. You turned around, chuckling at your amused grandfather. You walked over to him, resting into his outstretched arms. You looked up, nose brushing his coat as you smiled. “Please don’t ever change grandpa, you're the only normal member of our family.”
He smiled back down at you, giving you a reassuring squeeze.“I love you too peaches, everythings gonna turn out just fine, I promise.” He gave you a wink, his hand dipping into your coat pocket. “Don’t waste it!” He teased, as leaned over to pick up his bag.
You watched as he joined your mother on the train, waving at you as he sat down. The train doors closed, pulling away from the station as it continued on to Tokyo. You reached into your pocket, pulling out a folded 2,000 yen note. You laughed as you put it back. “How does grandpa always know what to say, truly a man of infinite wisdom.” You waved the train off as it disappeared down the tracks.
----
You had snoozed your alarm one too many times Monday morning, finally realizing your mistake twenty minutes before your first train left the station. You would have loved to say you were up all night doing something fun, maybe beating Doom for the third time this month, or catching up on your manga. But you had woken up at the table in your room, drool sticking the homework you had used as a pillow to your face.
You were rushing to get ready, throwing on your uniform as you frantically stuffed your books into your bag. Before long you were out of time, tripping down the stairs as you pulled up your sock. You had no time for lunch, you didn’t even have time to fix your bedhead. You ran out the front door, relying on the auto lock as you sped towards the main road. You attempted to tie your hair up as you rounded the corner to the crosswalk, the red hand illuminated from the other side of the road. You looked at the pole, both hands occupied in your mess of hair. You lifted your leg, kicking the button a few times as you impatiently waited for your turn to cross. Once it did you bolted across the street, shouting apologies as you pushed your way down the stairs and toward your approaching train. You barely squeezed past the closing doors, still attempting to catch your breath as the train pulled away from the station.
Collapsing into your seat you pulled out your bag to check that you had everything for your day. Homework (still kinda wet), text books, lunch (if you could call a bag of chips lunch), practice gear. Where was your practice gear? You attempted to recall your morning, thinking back to the last time you had everything in your sight.
“So I woke up, got dressed, put on my sweater backwards, put my things on the table, made lunch, and then I….left it on the fucking table.” The train pulled into it's first stop, the doors opening for the waiting passengers. You stood up, pushing your way past the crowd as you ran for the next train home. This just wasn’t your day.
----
You couldn’t believe how late you were when you finally made it to the school. “It’s 9:30, i’m screwed.” You mouthed, taking your tardy slip from the office attendant. You rushed up the school stairs, trying to make it to your classroom as fast as possible. As if that would change the fact that you were an hour late to school. You ran a sweaty hand over your messy hair before pulling the classroom door open. You closed it quietly, turning around slowly to an empty classroom.
Sugawara sat with his feet propped up on the desk at the front of the room. His phone in his hands as he scrolled through emails.
“Sensei, i’m sorry i’m late...” You mumbled, looking at the rows of empty desks. You made your way to the front of the room, setting the tardy slip on his desk.
“L/N-san, why aren't you on the bus? They are leaving for the field trip!” Sugawara’s eyes went wide as he looked up at you from his phone. He stood up from his seat, glancing between you and the piece of paper.
“Field trip? Was the field trip to the science museum today?” Your face dropped as you realised just what day it was. Sure it was Monday, the first Monday of the month. The first Monday of the month when they take all the students to the 3M Sendai Science Museum.
“Maybe we can still get you on the last buses?” Sugawara wrapped a hand around your wrist, pulling you behind him as he ran down the hallway and out to the south gym.
“How are they already all gone…” Sugawara knew the last bus had left at 9:00, but he had hoped to at least see some transportation left.
You looked at the empty lot, not a single bus in sight. What were you going to do now, they had shipped out the entire school for this field trip.
“Is there any way we can get her to the museum, I could drive her?” Sugawara was now at the front office, nervously talking with the secretary.
“I’m sorry, but she’s just going to have to spend the day in her classroom.” The woman gave you an apologetic look. She mouthed a few words to Sugawara, too quiet to make out before walking back to your desk.
Sugawara turned back to you, motioning for you to follow him back to the classroom as he walked past you.
Once you got back to the classroom you made your way to your desk, silently sliding into your seat. You looked over to your teacher, shifting uncomfortably as your eyes met his.
“Well you can work on any extra work you have. If you have any questions, i'll be in my office.” He leaned back on his heels before turning to enter his office. The door clicked closed behind him, the only sound left being the ticking of the clock on the wall.
You nodded to yourself, excepting that again today was just not your fucking day.
You had finished most of your work by 11:00, but the day was far from over. You looked at your last assignment, the creased ends of the page sticking out of the end of your math book. You had saved it for last for no other reason then to not do it. But the day was moving by so slowly, and you were going to have to finish it eventually.
“I might as well ask, i’m not going to finish this by myself.” You pulled at the paper, sliding it out of the book inch by inch. You could see the mess of work etched into the white sheet, the ghosts of prior mistakes partially erased in the background. “Sensei, could you help me with this problem?” You squeaked out the question, holding your breath as you listened for movement behind the office door. “Maybe if he doesn’t hear me I can just give up and take a nap.” You weren’t quiet enough, the door opening as Sugawara made his way over to your desk.
Sugawara pulled a chair over from the adjustment desk, taking a seat next to you. He motioned for you to show him the question, looking down at the paper in front of you. You felt it was better for him to just see the whole paper at this point. You slid the work to him, watching as his face contorted in confusion. He picked up your pencil, marking spots as he attempted to work through whatever thought process you had had.
“Oikawa tried to help me…” You added, hoping he wouldn’t think all the stupidity on the paper was you.
Laying it back in front of you, he handed you back your pencil. “You're close, it's a simple mistake really.” He leaned over the desk, resting his elbow on the table and his head in his hand as he guided you through your missteps.
You always loved how he would say that. “A simple mistake. ”Like it was easily fixable. It made your confidence skyrocket, that's probably why he was such a good teacher. You watched him work through a few, briefly stopping at each step to check back in with you.
“Yeah, you got it, see I knew you could do it!” His brilliant smile made your stomach flutter. It was a fleeting slight, soon he had turned his attention back to the problems.
“Thank you sensei.” You smiled to yourself, moving on to the next question on your sheet.
After a few minutes Sugawara had deemed you on the right path, standing up to return to his office. He closed the door, leaving a small gap as he disappeared from view.
“And he’s gone…” You had liked the company, a pleasant change from the quiet classroom you had been sitting in for the past three hours.
A few minutes later he emerged from his office, ,a stack of papers in hand as he walked over to his desk. Sitting down, he propped his feet up on the desk. He set a small pile of papers on his lap, pulling the cap off a red pen as he started to grade. He peaked up for a moment, giving you a quick smile before turning over the paper in his hand.
You watched him for a while, taken aback by his sudden change of mood. For weeks he had been cold and distant, avoid you like the plague. But here he was, choosing to sit in the same room, smiling at you. It was baby steps, but steps nonetheless.
It had felt like you were a flower living under perpetual clouds, but the sun had started to return, and you were basking in it.
“Sensei?” You called out, pulling nervously at your sleeves.
He looked up at you again, his eyebrow knitting together.
“It was now of never, just fucking say it, get it over with and say it.” You straightened up in your seat, leaning towards the edge of your chair.“Sensei i’m sorry. What I said was uncalled for, I should have just told you I didn’t want to continue the tutoring lessons. I…my actions were uncalled for and I'm sorry if I put you in an awkward situation.” You looked down at your hands, fingers digging into the material of your skirt. You felt a hand on your head, gently patting your hair down. You tilted your head up slightly, blushing as you met Sugawara’s bright smile.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have come off so harsh. You had a right to be uncomfortable talking to me about it.” His voice was soothing, his smile turning soft. His irises twitched, sadness washing over the brown hues as he pulled his hand away.
“Could we maybe, start over. I really was grateful for you helping me.” You stood up, attempting to stand eye level with the person in front of you.
Sugawara contemplated the question, uncertainty pulling at his lips. “I don’t know L/N-san, I’m pretty busy.”
You frowned at his answer, he did have a life after all. Probably friends, pets, maybe even a girlfriend. Of course he would rather spend his time after school with them, not tutoring a student on a subject he didn’t even teach.
“But, if you can promise me you’ll show up. I can give you back your Mondays and Fridays.”He shrugged lightly, amused with your reaction.
“Thank you so much Sensei, I-i’ll do anything to make up for it!” You bounced up and down on your heels, absolutely ecstatic.
He cocked his eyebrow at the word anything, chuckling to himself. “Just make sure you make it to the Spring tournament.” He made his way back to his desk as you sat back down.
You had missed the sun.
The rest of the day came and went, the ticking of the clock no longer ringing in your empty ears.
You had finished your work right as the lunch bell rang, officially all out of schoolwork for the day. You and Sugawara ate lunch together in the classroom, taking the time to go over extra problems from your math book.
“So, if you take away 47, add these totals together and...are you just eating a bag of chips for lunch?” He stared at you in horror as you pulled out the bag, his stomach hurting for you.
“I um, didn’t have time to make a...yeah, this is all i'm eating. You're looking at me like my mom…” You shrank in your seat, pulling the bag closer.
He shook his head at you before continuing the lesson.
The rest of the day you spent in his office, looking over all his belongings as he typed away on his computer.
“Hey, can you get out of my things. Don’t you have something to do?” He groaned, watching you pick through his book collection.
“Yeah, annoy you.” You rested your finger on a blue book, sliding it out of it's stop. You flipped through the pages, walking over to sit down on the couch.
“Comfy?” he laughed, watching as you rolled over. Your back now on the seat cushions as your head fell off the side of the sofa.
You let your feet rest on the windowsill, crossing your legs as your back sank into the couch. You looked up at him, tilting your head to see him peering down at you. “Yes, quite.” You giggled, laying your head back down.
Once school had officially ended he walked you to the front doors, waving a goodbye as he watched you walk down the courtyard and towards the school gates. The school buses wouldn't be returning for another two hours, but you had no real reason to stay past the normal school hours. Practice had been canceled for the day ,making your extra trip home useless. “But the day hadn’t gone to waste” ,you thought, smiling to yourself.
----
“Koushi, you're coming out. You’ve been so moppy for weeks. Get ready and i'll send you the address.” Daichi yelled into the phone, already at the bar.
Sugawara ended the call with Daichi and sighed. He just wanted to spend his weekend relaxing, not at some dive bar. But his friends had been harassing him for weeks about not coming out. He was having a hard time coming up with excuses at this point.
It was already Saturday, an entire week had flown by. You and him were civil again, but not completely the same. He wasn’t sure what to do. Should he leave things as they were, at least you were talking. Or should he press furth, see how close he could get to crossing the line with you. He just didn’t know, and being here tonight wasn’t going to help that.
Sugawara walked into the tiny dive bar, looking around for his friends in the crowd of people. He found them at the bar, shoulders pressed against the other bar patrons as they attempted to wave down the bartender.Sugawara set a hand on each of their shoulders, turning them slightly to greet them.
“You're here!” Daichi smiled, pulling his friend into a hug.
“We honestly didn’t expect you to come.” Asahi laughed, joining in the reunion.
“Well I wouldn’t have picked this place…” Sugawara looked around at the overly packed bar. “Why is it so busy, isn’t this place little dated for all these kids?” Sugawara looked around at the adolescents crowding the stage area, grimacing. He wasn’t much older, but he had never much liked his age group.
“Some pop punk band is playing tonight, I guess they are big with the college students.” Asahi smiled, leaning against the bar to order.
“So who’s the girl that has you so worked up?” Daichi questioned, shouting over the bar noise.
‘’No girl, just work.” Sugawara scowled at Daichi, a warning for him to stop prying.
“I know that look Koushi, who’s the girl?” He had been friends with Sugawara for long enough to know the difference in his moods. Work made Sugawara grumpy, and girls made him moody. He knew the difference.
Sugawara sigh. “It doesn't matter, we're technically not allowed to be talking anyways.”
Asahi offered Sugawara a bottle, nudging him as he took it. “You got a crush on one of your coworkers?”
“Yeah, something like that.” Sugawara rolled his eyes, bringing the bottle to his lips.
Daichi laughed as the house lights went down, the crowd cheering.
“Hi, we're Systematic. We have some shirts and stuff for sale at the front if you're into that.”You turned to your drummer as he counted off for the song to start. “This is “Painkiller.”
He couldn’t fucking believe it, that was you, in a band, playing at a bar, right in front of him.
“Hey, they actually sound pretty good. The singer is kinda cute!” Daichi laughed, pointing towards you.
“I'm being punished right? I did something awful in my past life and that's why all of this is happening.” Sugawara turned towards his friends, clasping his hands together. “Kill me please.”He pleaded to his friends, desperation in his eyes.
“I can’t hear you!” Asahi furrowed his eyebrows as Koushi’s lips continued to move, raising a hand to his ear.
“You could hit me with your car, or mine, maybe throw me off a cliff.” It was useless, his friends were absorbed in the song. Completely ignoring his impending break down, too fascinated with the bubbly girl bouncing around onstage.
As the first song came to an end, a stagehand met you with a guitar and a water bottle at the edge of the black curtains. You took the guitar from her, adjusting the strap as you walked back over to the microphone. “Today’s set is short, but we will be at Kyoritsu Kodo next month. Door price is set at 4,000, so show up and support Ryu’s bleach addiction.” You laughed as you threw a guitar pick at the bass player.
He ducked out of the way, flipping you off.
You counted off the next song and the band started, the upbeat tempo resonating through the crowd.
He had to admit, you looked happy. The way you bounced up and down along with the drums made him smile. He would have maybe picked a warmer outfit if he were you, but the new look was refreshing to say the least.
You had on a black sweater dress, one size too big as it hung off your shoulder. The purple of your thigh high socks peaked out from your equally high black boots. He could faintly make out a small bow on each side of the straps most likely connected to the garters further up your legs. He was trying to leave most of that to the imagination.
“This is all too much…” His face was growing hot as he watched you dance around the stage. Prompting the crowd to move along with you as you sang into the microphone.“At Least she dances like an old lady, that's helping a little.”
You stretched out your arm, turning the microphone to the crowd. Beaming as they sang the chorus back to you.
He had seen that smile only a handful of times. He saw it when you were walking in the hallways with your friends, laughing as they argued. He saw it while setting yourself up for a serve. And he saw it now as you closed your eyes, basking in the crowd singing along.
The final cords played as you opened your eyes again. “So that was our rendition of “Sports”, next is a song I wrote on the train last week. It’s the byproduct of a broken heart and shoujo binge reading.” You chuckled awkwardly as your band tuned for the song. “So this is “All I Wanted.” You slid the microphone back into the stand, adjusting it to reach your lips.
Sugawara pushed forward, moving through the crowd in an attempt to see you better.
“Hey Koushi is moving up to the stage, lets go!” Daichi grabbed Asahi’s arm, pulling him along as he fought to keep up with Sugawara.
Sugawara stopped a few feet away from the stage, worried you would see him in the crowd if he got any closer. Sugawara was losing himself as he watched you, your hands gripping the microphone stand for support as you sang. The song was different from the rest, sadder, full of emotions. It was you, more so than the rest. He started to wonder who you had written it for, who had given you so many different feelings. Maybe Yoshiki, you two seemed close enough for that.
The band cut off, leaving you alone. He saw the tears lining your lashes as you belted into the microphone, eyes closed tight. “All I wanted was you!” The band came back on your last note, the full sound reverberating around the full room. Sugawara bit his lip, fighting back the emotions that flooded his mind. He could see the hurt you held as you opened your eyes, the glistening of forming tears reflecting the stage lights as you looked into the crowd.
The song ended too soon, the house lights rising. You pulled at your sleeve, wiping at your eyes as you waved a goodbye. “Thanks for coming out, I'm Kiko and we are Systematic.” You smiled brightly, trying to take in the faces in the crowd one last time. Your rotation stopped on a familiar pair of hazel eyes, your own growing wide as you looked his way.
“Did she see me? She looked right at me…” Sugawara thought. He stood still, like a deer in the headlights of an oncoming truck.
Your face dropped as the realization set in, turning abruptly to make your way off the stage.
“She definitely saw me.” Sugawara groaned.
You were trying to pack up and leave when you heard shouting from the stage. You grabbed a handful of wires, stuffing them into a bag as you rushed to finish.
“Hey, you can’t go backstage!” A stagehand yelled from behind the curtains.
“Koushi, what the hell are you doing? Get off the stage!” You couldn’t pick out the voice from the dissipating crowd, turning to see what exactly was going on.
You watched Sugawara push through the curtains, frantic eyes scanning for you. Panic setting in when you saw him push past a stage hand, his heated gaze on you.
You tried to crawl through the clothing rack behind you, the exit in sight as you pushed through the other side. A rough hand grabbed the collar of your dress, yanking you back out into the open.“Hi, sensei...what are you doing here?” You awkwardly laughed, looking for someone to save you.
“What am I doing here?” He laughed as he grabbed your forearm, pulling you towards the emergency exit. He pushed open the door, forcing you through before slamming it closed behind him.“Explain.” He glared down at you, blocking your escape.
You felt like you were under a search light, people staring at you as they walked by the fence.
He waited for your response, looking over your face as you avoided his eye contract. “Can you please just tell me what is going on, and why you're at a dive bar at 11 p.m on a Saturday night.”His tone was softer now as he crossed his arms over his chest, his heated gaze easing into a warm stare.
You might as well just get it all out. You took a deep breath, finally meeting his eyes.“So freshman year I really liked this band called Bunny, and I would go watch them at the university all the time. But the singer quit last year and they started up Systematic with the remaining members, but they needed a singer and I like singing. But I was only 17 at the time and they were looking for someone older. So I kind of auditioned as Kiko, a 21 year old college student. I don’t drink or do anything illegal...like super illegal. Because you know that me being in the bar is illegal because I'm only 18, but that's probably why you're mad. It’s just bars are the only shows we can get, and we're working hard to get a venue show and we have one next month. Sensei please don’t tell them how old I am. This band means the world to me.” Your shrank into your words, confidence dying.
He looked at you in shock at the paragraph you had just word vomited out. His attention turned away from you as the emergency door flung open.
“Koushi what the fuck?” Daichi spat, looking between the two of you as Asahi followed behind him, apologizing to security on his way out the exit.
You looked at Sugawara, pleading him not to say anything.
“This is the girl.” He sighed, it was this or exposing you. At least only one person suffered with this explanation.
“This is THE girl?” Asahi gave his friend a confused look, pointing back and forth between the both of you.
“Wait, that sad song. Was that about him?” Daichi pointed to Sugawara, holding in a laugh.
You shrugged slightly, nodding. Things honestly couldn't be going any worse.
“Ok, ok we're done here, shows over!” Sugawara grabbed Daichis arm, tugging him as he walked to the parking lot. He turned around, scowling.
“Th-thank you Suga...Koushi!” You stuttered out, giving him an awkward wave.
He mouthed a silent “We are talking about this tomorrow.” Turning back around to yell at his friends.
You were in some serious trouble, maybe it was time to make that cake.
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Previous Chapter - Next Chapter
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*Hi, I just want make a disclaimer that I do not own any of the song's or art I used for this chapter or any others. Beach Bunny wrote Sports, and Painkiller. Paramore wrote All I Wanted ,and I wrote this mediocre fanfiction. I also want to say thank you for those of you reading this! It means alot that you would take the time to read it as the story unfolds! I hope your enjoying it, and if you have any thoughts, criticisms, or advice I would love to hear it! I am very much an amature at writing, but I want to give you the best chapters I can. So thank you again!*
#haikyuu!!#haikyū!!#haikyuu#sugawara x you#hq sugawara#sugawara x reader#sugawara scenario#sugawara kōshi#sugawara#sugawara x y/n#sugawara koushi#sugawara koshi#teacher sugawara#student x teacher#teacher sugawara koshi#guest starring#sawamura daichi#asahi azumane#fanfiction#fanfic#fandom
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If you were a witch, which animal would be your familiar? I don’t what a familiar is or anything about witchcraft.
If there's a design on your shirt, what is it? I literally just described it in the previous survey I did, but it has Ralphie from A Christmas Story on it with a bar of soap in his mouth and says, “Oh, fudge”, which is a quote from the movie.
If it was possible to colonize any planet and you were the leader, which planet would you choose? I really wouldn’t want to be the leader of anything. I’m not fit for that.
Is there a piece of technology that you just can't live without? I mean, I’m pretty attached to my laptop and phone, but of course if for some reason I couldn’t have them I would survive, but it’d be really quite boring. I don’t have much to do.
Would you ever visit a ghost town? That would be interesting.
What's the last thing you ordered from the last fast food place you went to? Loaded potato wedges and 3 egg rolls from Jack in the Box.
Which natural disaster scares you the most? They all sound terrifying. I’ve never experienced one. What're your religious beliefs and why do you follow them? I’m a Christian. I believe in God and that Jesus died for our sins and is our Savior.
What do you think happens after you die? I believe in heaven and hell.
What would you do if you found out your life was only a simulation controlled by someone else? That’s scary. I’ve had thoughts like that, though. Like a Truman Show scenario or that one day I’ll wake up and find out my whole life has been a dream.
What's the scariest thing you've accidentally found on the internet? Ugh, I HATED when jump scare things would go around. Like, people would disguise as a link for something else and then you click it and it’s some ugly, creepy looking girl screaming really loud. OH, and there was that one with the car that was driving down some winding road and you’re watching and waiting to see what the video is about and then bam! something pops up on the scream and scares you. Ughhh. Not cool. I’m such a jumpy person as it is already.
Is there anything bothering you right now? The usual stuff as always.
Thinking of every Halloween costume you've had, which one was the most creative? I never had a really creative one. They were pretty simple.
What song are you currently listening to and what song was the last you listened to? I’m not listening to music.
What's the picture on your calendar for this month? I don’t have a calendar for this year at the moment.
If you were a mythical creature, which would you be? A fairy.
If you were an animal, which would you be? A dog.
Were you ever bullied when you were younger and how did you handle it? I wasn’t, fortunately. It was something my parents worried about when I was in elementary school because I’m in a wheelchair, but honestly I never had any issues with anyone. The only bullying I receive is from myself on a regular basis.
What do you remember most from being five years old? I have some vague, bits and pieces of memories from kindergarten.
What do you remember most from being ten years old? I have some memories from 4th grade. My favorite teacher ever was my 4th grade teacher (who later ended up teaching 8th grade and I had him again) and I remember funny stuff he did and like how he read out loud to us books such as Matilda and he would the voices and made it fun for us. He also used to sing, and I remember one time he led all of us in a rendition of “I Want It That Way” by The Backstreet Boys lol. He was so cool. Oh, and he was known for doing “the robot” dance and miming.
What do you remember most from being fifteen years old? Stuff from high school.
What does the last person you found attractive look like? Alexander Skarsgard is 6′4, has blonde hair, blue eyes, is very fit and in shape, and Swedish. He’s absolutely gorgeous.
Have you ever thrown something away and then wanted it back? Yes. I hold onto a lot of stuff that will sit in a box somewhere forever, but then if I get rid of something I’ll suddenly wish I still had it or have a need for it again.
What's one random city you want to visit? Seattle.
If you owned a store, what would you most likely sell? Books. It would have a cafe, too.
If you had a garden, what sort of plants would you grow? I don’t know, man. I have zero interest in gardening.
What's your favorite phase of the moon? I don’t have one.
What're your plans for today? I’ll attend my church’s livestream and then do the normal things I do everyday.
What's the song for your life right now? I don’t know.
Do you believe that when you die, you get to see all your loved ones again? Yes.
Who would you be the most excited to see? My grandparents.
Have you lost or almost lost someone close to you to death this year? Not so far... I don’t want to think about that.
Did you lose any of your friends this year and if so, how? I don’t have any friends to lose.
Have you experienced anything new this year and if so, what? Not so far, but we’re only in January.
Do you enjoy reading National Geographic magazines? I’ve only read a few.
Would you rather read the book or watch the movie? I love to read and I’m down to check out the movie.
Do you know anyone who's serving in the military right now? No.
Does or did either of your parents serve in the military? Nope.
Has anything in your house ever caught on fire? No.
Have you ever hugged a stranger you thought was someone else? No. Omg, that would be super embarrassing. I’ve waved to someone I thought was someone else, but never went so far as to hug someone I thought was someone else. As a small child, did you ever feel as if you were different or weird? No, not really.
If you could instantly know any language in the world, what would it be? I’d like to be fluent in Spanish.
This year, how many times have you been to the doctor? So far just once. I go once a month and we’re only in January.
Do you have a library card and if so, do you use it often? Nope. I haven’t had a library card since I was in high school.
Do you like romcoms and if you do, which one is your favorite? Yeah, I’m a sucker for the romcoms. I have several favorites.
Thinking of your ex and the person you love, are they similar in any way at all? I don’t have a significant other or someone I’m interested in at the moment.
Is there something you currently want and/or need that you can’t have? Yes.
Thinking back to six weeks ago, were you happier then or are you happier now and why? Neither then or now.
Who's the first male you can think of whose name begins with "T" and what can you tell me about him? Thomas, my maternal grandpa. He sadly passed away 10 years ago. Both of my maternal grandparents passed away. I was very close with both of them and losing them was very hard for me. I miss them both every single day. My grandpa was an amazing man. He was the best husband, father, and grandpa. He was hardworking. He provided well for his family. He was loving. He was so funny. He told the best stories. He was known for being a talker haha, he could go on and on for hours, but everyone always wanted to hear what he had to say. And sometimes he’d go off on tangents, but the stories always came for circle. He was just an incredible man, well loved and missed by many.
Can you say "happy birthday" in another language? Yeah, “Feliz cumpleaños.”
What subjects do you or did you get the worst grades in? Math was always my worst subject, I barely scraped by with Cs.
Should you be concentrating on something else instead of this survey? Nah. This is my nighttime routine.
Have you ever told someone that you loved them and they rejected you? I didn’t tell them I loved them, but I expressed my feelings for them and was rejected. Twice.
Do you know anyone else that's happened to? Yeah.
Is there anything you want to say to someone, but you can’t or won’t? Not at this time. What're your reasons for not saying it? --
Who's someone in the music industry you think is overrated? Taylor Swift. Don’t for me, Swifties.
Who's the eleventh contact in your phone and when did you last see or speak to that person? I’m not checking.
What’s your mother’s middle name? I’m not sharing that.
When was the last time you ate cake and what type of cake was it? I had some red velvet cake a few days ago.
Have you ever been told you were too good or not good enough for someone you loved? I had friends who said I was too good for Joseph. I wasn’t good enough, though.
Why do you think someone would say that to you? They didn’t like how he treated me and thought he was too immature.
If the last person you kissed said you were the only one they wanted, would you believe them? That was 8 years ago, I don’t see him ever saying that now...
Who was your first crush, how do you feel about that person now and do you still talk to them? My first crush was this kid Philip when I was in 3rd grade lol it was just some little crush, I was 9. He didn’t even know me.
Who was the last person that apologized to you and what was it for? I don’t recall.
So how're things going with the person you love? There’s no such person.
Are you "in love" with the last person you kissed? No. I moved on years ago.
Do you have photos to go with all of the contacts in your phone? I haven’t added a photo for any of my contacts.
Who was the last person to comment on one of your photos on Facebook and how did you meet that person? I think it was my Nana.
How many of your friends are sexually active?
To finish, is there anything you would like to say to someone? Sigh.
Do you think surveys are annoying? They can be sometimes, but I really do enjoy doing them. Clearly.
What career paths are you considering? I don’t know. :/
Do you watch music videos? I haven’t in a long time.
Have you ever clicked on those banner ads that promise a prize for clicking? No. I definitely don’t miss popup ads.
What kind of computer are you using? Macbook Air.
What kind of computer do you wish you were using? I’m happy with this one.
Have you ever had a weight change so drastic you went to the doctor? I didn’t see a doctor for it specifically, but yeah it was concerning. It’s still a problem I’m struggling with.
How cold does it have to be before you put on a sweater? In the 60s F, I’d say.
Do you eat things off the floor? Never.
Who do people say you look like? My mom.
Do you usually get your homework done on time? I’m done with school, but yeah I always got my homework done on time. I may have been a major procrastinator, but my work always got done.
Have you ever framed your old movie ticket stubs? Not framed, but kept.
Do you have a digital camera? Nope.
Have you ever stuck something inappropriate in an electrical outlet? No. I’m afraid to plug in things that meant to go in there as it is.
What do you have anything scheduled for the 16th of this or next month? We’re past the 16th now, but no I didn’t have anything going on that day and I don’t have anything planned for that day next month either.
Can you sleep without any pillows? No. I can’t sleep flat, I have to be propped up.
Is there a color you refuse to wear? I don’t like to wear white.
Has anyone ever pulled a gun on you? No, but I am a victim of random gun violence.
Are there any chairs in your bedroom? My chair. There’s an ottoman that could also be a chair as well.
How many pairs of shoes do you have? Like 6 or 7.
How much was the last item of clothing you bought? My total was $40 for 2 shirts, but I ordered online so there’s additional fees.
Where's your father right now? He’s in his room asleep.
Do you skip breakfast often? Yeah.
How many days has it been since your last birthday? My birthday was 6 months ago.
Do you want any more siblings than you have now? Nah, at 31 years old I can’t imagine having another sibling.
Would you make a good president or prime minister? Nope. I have no desire to be one.
Are you going out of the country soon and if so, where to? No. I don’t have any travel plans and who knows when I will at this point. :(
Do you ever feel like you want to get away from everything? Yeppp.
Do you need a haircut? I could use a trim.
When was the last time you went on a trampoline? Never.
Were you alone today? I’m alone right now in my room cause everyone else is asleep, but they’re here in the house. My dad is off today and will be home all day. My mom and brother have work, but they’ll be home at some point.
Who was the last person you saw today? The day isn’t over yet, it’s only 4:51AM, but I’m willing to bet my brother will be the last person I see cause he and I stay up late.
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Able x Reader: It Never Lasts
Chapter 3
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“Now Class, can one of you tell me the answer to this equation?” (Y/N) wrote the small equation, 26+39 on the chalkboard in front of the whole class.
Some of the students began to solve the equation on their chalkboards and others either drew on them or just did nothing. (Y/N) grabbed her stick from her desk and tapped it on the desk of a student who wasn’t doing anything. The boy groaned and began to solve the equation on his small board.
After a few minutes, some of the students raised their hands to answer the teacher. (Y/N) looked around the room and chose a boy in the far back to answer.
“65?” answered the boy. He looked nervous while giving his answer, afraid he got it wrong.
The teacher smile. “Correct!” She went back to the board and began to solve it herself. “For those of you who got it wrong, what you do is stack them first and then you start solving from right to left. Like this.” She demonstrated to the children by following her own steps. “6 plus 9 is 15, so you place the five here at the bottom and place the one on top of the two and the three. After that, you add all three of these numbers.”
Once she was finished, she turned back around to see the students either paying attention or drifting off into their own world. She walked to her desk and picked up a stack of papers. She walked to the first desk in the row and began handing them out.
“This will be your homework for today, class. They’re math equations.” She paused a bit as she heard a few of the children groan. “Now I suggest you actually do this, for those who never do their homework, Brian,” everyone stared and giggled at Brian; the boy at the front of the class who groaned when he was forced to solve the math equation. “because tomorrow we’re having a test.”
“What!?” Brian said shockingly. Everyone laughed at his reaction.
(Y/N) kept handing out the papers to the rest of the class. “You heard me, young man. You need to study if you want to get a good grade and pass my class.” After she was done, she walked to the front of the class with the extra papers in her hands. “Or, you could always retake class, again.” She playfully placed her hand on her hip in a sassy way and gave him a “you can do better” look.
The laughter only grew as Brian was being roasted and embarrassed.
“I can help ya study, Brian.” said a little girl beside him. Her name was Merida. She had her long, brown hair pulled up in a ponytail with a pink ribbon. Her skin was pale and had freckles on the bridge of her nose and cheek. The color of her eyes is an ocean blue with a ring of dark blue on the outside. She wore a fluffy, pink dress with black shoes. They weren’t new and they didn’t look new either. All her clothes are simple hand me downs from family.
(Y/N) smiled at her. “Well, how kind of you to offer Brian help, Merida.” (Y/N) liked Merida. Every time she sees her, she smiles. You see, she found out Merida was once an orphan like herself. But unlike her, Merida managed to find a nice family to take her in. She was always happy to see the old couple who took her in. The couple wasn’t able to have children of their own, so they decided to adopt Merida.
“No.” said Brian. “I don’t want no help from a girly girl like you.”
Merida rolled her eyes. “Hmph. Well, good luck then. I tried being nice. Maybe you should give it a try.”
Brian stuck his tongue out at her and she did the same.
“Hey, now. Don’t be rude to each other.”
The teacher was interrupted by the sound of the bell. The children immediately started shoving everything in their bag; some were already out the door.
“Don’t forget to study!” (Y/N) tried calling out, but they were already gone. She sighed and shook her head. She walked back to her desk and placed the extra papers on it.
“Knock knock.” said a woman in a sing-song voice.
(Y/N) turned back around to see who it was. She smiled when she realized who it was. “Hi, Celia.”
Celia was another one of the teachers here. She taught the older kids. “Hello, my little birdie~” she skipped all the way to her desk, did a 180 turn and sat on her desk with her right leg on top of the other. “Notice anything,” she lifted her right leg up, “different?”
(Y/N) cocked an eyebrow. “Let me guess.” she sat on her chair. “Mr. Money-man bought ya something.”
Celia scoffed. “For the last time, his name is Anthony Miller.” she pouted. “And yes, he did buy me somethin’.”
She smiled. “You’re spoiled.” She picked up a quill and began to grade last night’s homework.
The red-haired teacher gasped dramatically and placed a hand on her heart. “I may be spoiled, but…” she paused, trying to figure out what to say. (Y/N) waited patiently. She pursed her lips and gave up. “Okay. I give up. I am spoiled.”
“Told ya.” (Y/N) laughed and shook her head and went back to grading the homework.
Celia laughed as well. "But really. Guess."
The (H/C) haired teacher sighed and continued with her task.
It has been three years since she came to Strine and became a teacher. During her time here, she became happier than she could ever be. For so long she waited to have a family. A family to raise her and take care of her and teach her things she wouldn't be able to learn on her own. Now, after becoming a teacher, these students were her family. She will take care of them, and raise them, and teach them things; everything that never happened to her when she was growing up.
She was happy here. She was happy with her current life. And honestly, she didn't plan on changing it. Everything was going just the way she wanted. Well…. She wasn't really planning on having an annoying best friend, but I guess it's a bonus for her.
"Is it the shoes?" She said with an annoyed smile.
Celia squealed in excitement and kicked her feet. "YES! Just look at 'em! Look how they sparkle! They're so beautiful! Ah!"
Just last week, a rich man came into town and immediately took fancy on Celia once he laid his eyes on her. Celia, being the sucker she is, didn't take down the opportunity of being with a handsome, rich man. And now every day, (Y/N) sees her with something new and expensive.
'Well, at least he's making her happy.' She thought to herself. Though she did not approve of this method of winning a girl's heart, knowing her friend, there is nothing she could do to convince her that she could find a better and more loving man. One who does not win one's heart by buying gifts.
She smiled at her red-haired friend and nodded. "I'm glad he's making you happy, but don't ya think ya should be planin' your next lesson for tomorro'?"
Celia rolled her eyes and jumped off the desk. "Oh come on, sugar pie, learn to live a little." She slowly walks around her and drags her arm around her friend's shoulder. "Besides," she lowers her lips to her ear, "you're just jealous."
(Y/N) rolled her eyes and gently pushed Celia back causing her to chuckle. "I ain't jealous." She put her quill back into its holder. "But, I suppose it would be nice to be able to buy everything ya wanted." She admitted. I mean. Really. Who wouldn't want to be able to buy everything they wanted no matter how expensive it was?
"So why don't ya find yourself a man?" Celia asked as she placed her hand on her hip.
A man? (Y/N) didn't have time for a man. The school and the children were far too important for her than going out to waste her time to find a man. What's the point if the possibility of them staying is slim? Yes, she always hoped to become married and have children, but if it meant leaving her job, then…
"I don't wan' a man. I'm perfectly fine with the way my life is right now." She once again grabbed her quill and continued grading the homework.
Celia frowned at the (H/C) haired girl in front of her. She admitted that she was worried about her friend’s social life. Ever since she got here, she never attempted to have a conversation with any of the men here. All she did was isolate herself in her house grading papers or planning the next lesson. Of course, being the great friend she plans to be to her, she forces her to come out and socialize and come to the town’s seasonal parties. But right now, she sees that this is seriously a cry for help. And she intends to do something about it.
With a devious smile, she places her right hand on her left shoulder. “You know, (Y/N),” (Y/N) sighed and moved her eyes to look at her. “Why don’t we plan a fun little trip for the children!?”
(Y/N) coked an eyebrow. “What?”
“Oh come on, (Y/N). You’ve been so stressed and busy, lately. You need a day off and give the kids some fun. How ‘bout it?”
(Y/N) pondered for a moment. A field trip? She’s never done a field trip before. At first, she was interested but then it confused her. Why the change in subject all of a sudden? She narrowed her eyes at her. “What’s the catch?”
Celia just smiled sweetly at her. “No catch! Just a fun little trip, is all.”
“Just a trip?”
“Yup!”
“....”
“....”
“I’ll think about it.” with that, she focused her attention back to the papers.
Celia smiled brightly and started walking towards the door. “Alrighty, then! Bye, sugar!”
“Goodbye, Celia.”
After her classroom door closed, a frown began to tug at her lips.
She changed the subject. Why? She's planning something, (Y/N) knows it. She scoffed at the idea that popped into her head.
'A man. That's what she's gonna try to do.' She thought. 'She gonna get some big, strong, and handsome man to come with us on a field trip and have him flirt with me.' she chuckled at the thought.
"Yeah. As if some big shot's gonna waste their time with me." the sound of something snapping took her away from her thoughts. She looked down to see her broken feather and ink splattered all over a child's paper. She released her tight grip and sighed. "Aw, man. Sorry, Austin." She put the broken feather inside a bin next to her and grabbed her handkerchief to wipe off the black ink on her hand.
'Looks like it's gonna be stained for a while.' she thought.
After wiping her hand, she put all the papers back in one pile and began gathering her things. She grabbed her bag and stuffed it with everything she was going to take home.
---------------------------------------------
(Y/N) took out a set of keys from her bag and chose the one to her house. Considering how small the town still is, it didn't take long for her to get back home.
"Oh! Hello, sweety!"
(Y/N) turned back around to see one of her friends. She smiled and waved back at her. "Anabell. Hello. How's it goin'?"
Anabell made her way towards (Y/N) with a box in her hand. "Hello sweety. I'm doin' dandy. How 'bout you?" Anabell was the mother who gave her a lift towards town three years ago. At least once a week, Anabell would come visite (Y/N) for tea and coffee. The conversations they would have were mostly Anabell's since (Y/N) never really had anything to talk about. Most of her stories are things the students would do during class.
"I'm doin' just fine." she took out her key and placed it in the lock. "Care to come in?" she opened the door and held it for Anabell to come into.
"Thank you, dear." She set the box down on the coffee table. "So, care to explain why you're here so early? I was 'bout to walk all the way to the school."
(Y/N) closed the door and opened the blinds to let the sun in. She thought back to the quill incident. "I, um," she showed her stained hand at her. "I just got a little clumsy. Broke my quill and made a bit of a mess. Only got one at school so I came home to finish gradin'." A shy and embarrassed smile formed on her lips.
Anabell clicked her tongue and shook her head. She walked towards her and grabbed her unstained hand. "Come on." she said as she pulled (Y/N) to the couch. "Somethin's botherin' ya. Tell me."
The young teacher smiled at her concerned friend. "Just got clumsy." she lied.
The mother rolled her eyes. "Honey, I'm a mother of six. Knowing when somethin's wrong is our sixed sense. Just ask any mother."
(Y/N) pondered for a moment. During her time at the orphanage, she was always told how to act when presenting themselves in front of a gentleman. She was always taught how to be a good mother and wife and how to take care of a household. She never liked it. She always hated how they told her that it was mandatory for a woman to be married to a man. She will admit that having children is something that she's always wanted. But after growing up and seeing happy couples everywhere, she felt a bit lonely. There was always a small thought in the back of her head saying, 'It would be nice to have a man to love.' Because of that, she started to wonder what it would be like to have a man.
"Do you think I need a man?"
Anabell looked at her confused. "A man? So this is what it's all about, huh?"
"Yessum."
"Well, you really wanna know what I think?" she paused for a moment. "No."
Her answer confused (Y/N). "No?"
"No. You don't need a man. Look. You're doin' just fine on your own without one. You have your own life. The women out there are usually getting themselves a man because they can't get their own life. Women can't do much but get married and raise kids. There ain't that much jobs for us. You're lucky, though. You managed to get what most can't and you should feel proud about that. Do you feel proud?"
She chuckled. "Yessum."
"Good. But listen closely. I ain't sayin' you shouldn't get a man. You just asked if you needed one, and right now, you don't. You doin' just fine without one. None of this should mean you shouldn't get one. It's nice havin' one. It's nice having someone to love and care about ya. It's your desition if ya want one, sweetie. If ya do, then ya can't stay in here forever.
(Y/N) nodded at this. She smiled and hugged her friend. "Thanks."
Anabell hugged back. "Oh, of course, sweetie." she let go and placed her hands on the young teacher's shoulders. "So what caused these thoughts in the first place?"
She breathed in through her nose and exhaled out her mouth. She said only one word. "Celia."
Anabell lifts her hands up and lets them drop to her lap while rolling her eyes. "Celia. Of course. Why am I not surprised."
"Oh, she ain't that bad. She's just good at heart and wants what she thinks is best for me." (Y/N) as she fiddled with her fingers.
"She's a sucker for pretty boys, that's what she is." Anabell stated. "She wouldn't know what was good for her even if it smacked her in the face."
The two women laughed at the small joke. It was true, though. Now don't get her wrong. She's not a slut, whore, or anyone of those things. She's just someone who falls in love easily and is the type of girl that believes in love at first sight. She's also the type of girl that loves presents. The more presents, the more they love her; is what she thought. Of course, that's dangerous. She's been used and left because of her oblivious and blind mind of this so-called love she thinks she's receiving.
Becoming a school teacher was something that Celia also wanted to be, as well. Five years ago, she came to Strine, not in search of a new life, but because she followed a man here. He left her soon after, though. She was already a teacher from the town she previously lived in, so obtaining a job as a teacher was not a problem for her. She continued to search for a man around town, hoping one of them would finally claim her as their bride. And like always, she says that her new boyfriend, Anthony Miller, will finally be the man she marries. Only time will tell, now.
Anabell reached for the box on the coffee table and opened it to reveal bread and cookies. "Now, why don' we start the stove for the tea and coffee." she said while grabbing a cookie and taking a bite.
(Y/N) nodded and they both stood up to head towards the kitchen.
Prologue | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4
#able x reader#abel#able#scp fanfiction#scp fandom#scp 076#scp#scp foundation#scp containment breach#SCP-076-2#Able#Abel#scp 076 2 x reader#x reader#itneverlastsfanfiction
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I was tagged by @useyourillusion, thank you a whole lot!! ✨
Rules: Answer 10 questions, tag 10 people and make another 10 questions.
1. which parent do you look more like?
My mom. My dad has dark hair and dark eyes. But parts of my face sometimes resemble my dad more.
2. is water wet?
Things are wet when water sticks to them. Well, due to cohesion, water sticks to water so yes, water is wet unless you take one single water molecule.
3. what was/is your favourite subject at school?
Depends on the grade! Early elementary school had a composition (can't translate it better) class where we pretty much just had to write stories. I loved that. Later elementary I loved physics and art. Had an amazing art teacher in 8th grade! In high school it was art and math, in the last two years literature because my teacher was great.
4. describe your favourite teacher.
He was my 8th grade art teacher. He had somewhat long hair that he wore in a ponytail, and he generally looked like a painter. I believe he didn't have the confidence to be a successful painter, he was never satisfied with what he painted. But he was the perfect teacher, so maybe that's for the best. He was patient, kind and had great humour. We all respected him enough to not be too terrible in his class. He also held two extracurricular activities: art and photography. Of course I went to both.
5. would you rather go without mascara, or without concealer?
I don't really ever wear either, I don't even know how to put them on properly. But I'll go with mascara and without concealer cuz I don't really have anything to put concealer on anymore.
6. which season do you think your personality reflects?
Spring! I'm kinda unpredictable, you never know in what mood you'll find me, same as spring weather. Sometimes I'm gloomy, sometimes I'm warm and loving.
7. how superstitious are you, on a scale of 1-10?
5, I guess? I like to make up little superstitions for myself for fun.
8. talk about some of your superstitions.
Anything to do with making wishes. For example I always make a wish on a shooting star. I also had a ring I believed to bring me luck. Actually, I often have a possession I give the role of luck bringer. Also if I find a playing card without the rest of its deck I take note of it, cards like these might be conveying a message.
9. honest opinion of wearing heels?
Hats off to anyone who can! I would love to rock heels, but I'm not used to them, and I don't think they'd suit me.
10. 60s, 70s, 80s, or 90s fashion? pick one!
70s! Need those bell bottom jeans!!
☀️🌼☀️🌼☀️🌼☀️
1: Which was your best day in the past week? What made it good?
2: Where do you like to go to retreat from the bustle of everyday life?
3: If you were to write under a pen name, what would that name be?
4: Which of your senses is most important to you?
5: Which emotion generally considered negative do you see most beauty in?
6: What sounds and noises are the most peaceful in your opinion?
7: Write about an interesting dream you had!
8: How much do you care about your health?
9: Write about any adventure you had, no matter if it's grand or small!
10: Show a work of art you find beautiful!
☀️🌼☀️🌼☀️🌼☀️
I tag @disco-lizardd, @punkslap, @feather-canyons, @queenofliqht, @harshkali-eh, @candyandcurrantbun, @sadbarrett, @velvetcherrybabe, @anthonybanks, @aphroditedahlia and @crunchyspicysalmon, if you wanna! 🌻
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When and why did I choose the languages I learn?
As a break from my thesis, I want to describe my life-long adventure with foreign languages. All this started when I was 9 or 10, it was a boring summer holiday. I had nothing to do, so I rewatched all the Barbie movies. I knew them by heart, so to change something I watched them in all the languages possible. However, each language has a different story, so I’ll describe them separately.
English: I started English when I was 6, I loved it from the very beginning. In the primary schools I always scored A’s and B’s, I frequented additional classes till the age of 11. It got worsen in secondary school, I don’t know if I didn’t like the teacher or the teacher didn’t like me, somehow my grades were much worse than before. However, on the finals I scored 100% and 88%. In the high school I felt my love for this language again. I can say without doubt I was the best student in my group, even though I didn’t get engaged into competitions etc. I simply didn’t want to, but that’s a different story. When I realised I made a mistake having chosen a science class, I decided to take up a preparing course to the extended matura exam, which I managed to pass with 82% result. Then, I chose to study English at uni, and I must admit, it has been a 3-year holiday.
German: In the secondary school I had to choose a second language. My choice was German. When I struggled with English, it was German which still gave me the happiness. Actually, it was my first German teacher who noticed my talent for languages. She took care of me, engaged me into several competitions. After one year of additional lessons with her I knew as much as after 3 years of secondary school. Though, I really regret that I chose German in high school. I wasted 3 years during which I could have continued the study on my own and not repeating the basics each year. Now it’s been 9 years as I’m struggling with this hella boi. Even if I’m not as advanced as I would like to be, I enjoy learning it.
Spanish: I’m not sure if I can say that I have ever studied it. I’d rather say that I acquired it. Since I remember, I’ve been watching various Mexican telenovelas and somehow I managed to acquire it without officially learning it. I remember that once I was desperately looking for episodes of one of these telenovelas, but the only version was without subtitles or anything. However, when I started watching I realised that I can understand almost everything. After 6 months (and matura exams) I decided to buy some textbooks and start the official study. In 3 years I’m nearly fluent.
Italian: Honestly, I have no idea when my desire to learn Italian started. Maybe it was when I was 13, or when my cousin started learning it in high school. I started studying it in 2017, one month after I had taken up Spanish. In the first two years my progress wasn’t huge, it all changed when I became a fangirl of Il Volo and when I decided to go to Italy the following year. Believe me, I wanted to give it up several times seeing that I wasn’t progressing as fast as with Spanish. Now I can say that my Italian is only a bit worse than Spanish.
Norwegian: I wanted to learn a language of one of the Scandinavian countries. I lowkey neglected it now, but I’m still able to understand short texts and it enabled me to understand also Swedish and Danish.
Czech: C'mon, I’m Polish. I love the sweet sound of this language, it makes me laugh sometimes. If you ever asked yourself how Slavic languages sound for the speakers of another Slavic lang, for me Czech sounds like children’s speech. And this feeling keeps me very interested in it. A few months ago I managed to hold my first short conversation in Czech.
Hungarian: It looks so surreal. Also, Hungarian natives are very helpful people and they often learn Polish. Polak, Węgier — dwa bratanki — együtt harcol s issza borát. Unfortunately, there are very few resources for this wonderful language and Hungarian Duolingo course is the least helpful thing.
Russian/Ukrainian: I joined them together since they have quite similar stories. I fell in love with their soft sounds and a bit hard accents and also made my Ukrainian uni friends into checking my exercises XD. I took up Russian when I finished Ukrainian, sometimes I mix both of them. For example, in Naples I had a conversation with one Ukrainian woman and we used Ukrainian, mixed with Russian, mixed with Polish and Italian (we can register it as a conlang, I swear).
Portuguese: I never really planned it. It was an impulse, when speaking with my friend Heloísa. She said that the next language I should pick up should be Portuguese. Here we go!
Greek: It’s my #1 on my to-learn list. The love for this language is dated back for the Barbie movies era. For now, I’m able to read short captions even though I don’t understand what they say. And I always criticised my Maths and Physics teachers’ handwriting, the most horrible thing I have ever seen.
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494
Name: skia
Country: Canada
Age: 23
Gender(s): female
Height: 5’1
weight: 145
eye color: brown
skin color: white
Heritage: French, Swedish and Ukrainian
Relationship status: taken
Are you physically healthy? Yes and no
Are you mentally healthy? Nope
Job?: none atm
school: Rdc
Favs:
Animal: wolf
Flower: don’t have one
Movie: the lion king
TV show: this is us
Music: classic rock
Band: queen
Video Game: animal crossing
Gaming Console: ps4 or switch
Name: don’t have one
Person: jennifer
Love life:
1: Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend? Yeah
2: Do you love them? Of course
3: Are you still in love with an ex?no
4: How many people have you dated? Like 4
5: Do you think you’ll get married? I’m not sure
6: Have you ever been emotionally/physically abused in a relationship? -
7: Have you ever hurt your partner by accident without knowing it? Yeah I always apologize after
8: Whats important to you in a relationship? Communication and loyality
9: Do you have to see them everyday? ( or hear from them) before we lived together , yes but since we live together now he doesn’t need to text me every day cus we see each other daily but if he’s gone away then yeah lol
10: Do you think you can love someone within 2 weeks? I mean maybe but also no..
Friendship and Family:
1: How many friends do you have? Like 5
2: What type of friend are you? I’m not sure. The one who makes jokes
3: Have you ever been friends with someone for longer than 7 years? Yeah I think the longest js 13 years
4: Do you have one best friend, more or none? I have 2
5: Have you ever had a friend just stop being your friend and you never knew why? Yeah
6: Do you get along with family? Yes
7: Do you have a family member you hate? A few lol
8: Does your family accept who you are? Yeah
9: Are you an only child or have siblings? Sister
10: Do you have parents that still live together? My dad died so
School:
1:What grade are you in? Not in school
2: Are you in Middle, High, or college? ( or neither)? College technically
3: Whats your favorite class? Art
4: Do you have a fav school year? Prob grade 12 was the best lol
5: Are you a good student? I was
6: Do you think homework is good or bad? I think it’s stupid. I think kids should only do homework if they don’t finish in class. But it’s not fair to them.
7: Have you ever had a teacher who was really funny but had poor teaching skills? Yeah
8: Is your GPA high or low? Middle
9: Do you like to particpate in conversations in the class room or are you the listener? I rather listen
10: Do you take part in extra school events? (eg. Plays, sports, leadership,clubs) nah
Health
1: Do you need to lose or gain weight? Lose
2: Have you ever had the swine flu? (H1n1) yeah lmaoo
3: Do you like to go to the doctors? No I get anxious
4: Have you ever puked in school or at work? Nope I don’t think so
5: Have you ever been extremely sick where you couldnt even leave your bed? Yeah a few times I think I had covid lol
6: Do you hate puking or does it make you feel better? I hate it but it always makes me feel better after
7: Have you ever coughed up blood? No
8: Should you be eating healthier ? Yeah
9: Do you lie to your doctor? No
10: Have you ever taken too much advils? Yup
Mental Health:
1: Do you have a mental illness? I have A few
2: Do you take anti-depressants yes
3: Are you mentally stable? No lmao
4: Have you ever been misdiagnosed? No
5: Do you think you have an disorder but havent been properly diagnosed yet? Maybe
6: Is self diagnosing good or bad? Bad but I get why ppl do it bc they don’t have access
7: Should we give more money to mental health research? Yes!!
8: Do you think everyone has a chance to over come their mental disorders? Some maybe like anxiety possibly but most are jsut cus your brain is fucked
9: Would you ever not date someone if they had a severe disorder? ( Schizophrenia,BPD, mood disorders) Nope. Only wouldn’t date someone who had a mental health condition if it affected me very negatively
10: Does mental illness run in your family? Yeah
SEX
1: Virgin? No
2: what age did you lose it? 19
3: Did you take sex ed? Yeah from 4-12 grade
4: Does size matter? Sometimes....
5: Whats your favorite poistions? I like doggy or cowgirl
6: Does virginity exist? I mean I guess
7: Do you think sex is overated? Ehh no i
8: Is making love and fucking different? Yeah one is romantic other can be just for pleasure and to cum
9: Is it important for both genders to understand eachothers bodies? Yes
10: If someone was a virgin and was raped, did they lose their virginity? I mean technically yeah but I also think no I think virginity should be a consent thing
Check the box:
1.My hair color is: [x] Brown [] Black [] Blonde []Red [] Funky colors [] Auburn [] more than one color
2.Eye color: []Blue []Grey [x]Brown []Light brown []dark brown []green []amber [] I have two different colors of eyes
3.I am a : []Male [x] Female []Trans Male [] Trans Female []Gender Fluid [] I dont have a gender []Non Binary [] other
4: I am: []Fit [x] Average []Skinny []Fat
5: I love my : []Hair [x]Eyes []Smile []Teeth []Skin []everything about myself []None of these
6: I hate my: [x]Hair []eyes []smile [x]teeth []skin [] everything about myself [] I dont hate anything about myself
7: My feet are: [x]Small []Wide []Narrow []long []large []Ugly [x]Pretty
8: I have a hard time: [x]Finding something to wear []Making Friends [] making food []staying focused
9: I am: []Employed [x]Not employed []retired []I can’t work []Self employed [x]Looking for a job
10: I love: [x]the moon [c]the sun [x]the stars [x]our galaxy [x]planets
Bold what is true:
I am Funny
I am a girl
I have no hair
I have curly hair
^ I hate it
I have straight hair
I have a dog
I have a cat
I have both
I love to get drunk
I don’t drink
I love to smoke weed but i hate smoking cigarettes
I love both
I rather have one best friend than 20 friends who i am not close with
My dad died
My mom died
My parents are both dead
My parents are alive
I like to touch my bruises
I have funny teeth
I love Mcdonalds fries
Sometimes when Im alone I sing as loud as I can
even if i cant sing
I believe in God
I believe in the butterfly affect
I hate video games
I wish I was taller
I can’t understand math
I am very good at writing an essay
I never had sex before
I love Mac N Cheese
I love Disney Movies
I prefer Dreamswork over Walt Disney
I am going to College
I finished college
I wish I went to college
I hate my job
I am the boss at my job
I have a feelings for a friend but i cant tell them because it would ruin our friendship
^ I have feelings and i told them
I wish soda was healthy
I sleep with the window opened
This survey was too long
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all the even numbers 🤗
You are a BlessingTM 🙏
2. Chocolate bars or lollipops?
4. How did your elementary school teachers describe you? - Quiet, head either in the clouds or in a book.
6. Pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal, or sportswear? - Consider, grunge boho... Either that or formal grunge lol.
8. Movies or tv shows?
10. Game you were best at in p.e.? - Volleyball.
12. Name of your favorite playlist? - BTS paved the way lolol
14. Favorite non-chocolate candy? - Pop rocks.
16. Most comfortable position to sit in? - Cross-legged.
18. Ideal weather? - Stormy weather 😍😍😍 Lightning and thunder and rain are so calming to me
20. Preferred place to write? (I.e., in a notebook, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.) - My laptop, my hands cramp really easily so I usually write there or occassionally on myphone if I'm not around my laptop or have a Sudden Important Idea.
22. Role model? - In order: My nana, then BTS. I was gonna add more but. Idk who else I would want to add.
24. Favorite crystal? - Probably onyx.
26. Favorite activity to do in warm weather? - Swim!!!
28. Five songs to describe you? - Awake by BTS Jin, Epiphany by BTS Jin, Tonight by BTS Jin, Promise by BTS Jimin, and 19 by Stray Kids. Bonus: First Love by BTS Suga.
30. Places that your find sacred? - The very top of the magnolia tree in my front yard.
32. Top five favorite vines? - 'Look at all those chickens!', 'T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T-TARGET,' 'I won't hesitate, b i t c h,' 'What up I'm Jared I'm 19 and I never fucking learned how to read,' and 'Ha ha ha, I do that.'
34. Advertisements you have stuck in head? - '1-800-CONTACTS!'
36. What is the first meme you remember ever seeing? - I was gonna say the 'keep calm' things but. Then I thought about those cat memes, you know the one's. Like the 'Aliens' cat. Idk if that counts but I'm putting that cause anything else I can think of is Cursed fandom memes.
38. Lemonade or tea? - Tea, specifically sweet tea, but no one's tea but mine. Everyone else's tea is disgusting, even in Louisiana you go to fucking Sonic and they don't know how to make basic fucking sweet tea like? This is the south? Make it right???
40. Weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? - Okay so the school built this massive fucking ventilator system for the gym cause it was always balls hot in there or freezer burn cold, so that was fine. Well, lots of students smoked weed in the back of the gym where no one can see you unless they're Looking for you. I'm sure you can tell where this is going already. So, one day after the ventilators are finished and everything is back to normal, some kids smoked weed in the gym and well... It ended up reaching Every Goddamn Part of the school. The smell of weed was fucking everywhere. It Stunk. It was so bad that school was cancelled for the rest of the day and we all went home.
42. Jacket pockets of pants pockets?
44. Favorite scent for soap? - Okay so my sense of smell is pretty sensitive, so some smells are really triggering in that they can trigger horrible headches, panic attacks, dizziness, etc. Uaually, I'm around a lot of neutral scents so I'm fine, but lots of shampoos, conditioners, and soaps have extreme scents. So, either a subdued floral scent or a really plain and basic unscented soap.
46. Most comfortable outfit to sleep in? - Pants/shorts and a shirt or nothing.
48. If you were a fruit, what kind would you be? - I don't know what a fruit is, but I think a lemon is a fruit. Even if it's not, that's what I'm choosing lol
50. What made you laugh the hardest you ever have? - Tbh, some things really easily set me off laughing for like 20 minutes so idk. Maybe the inside 'Spoon' joke with my friend.
52. Favorite font? - Word's High Tower Text is really nice. Or Papyrus. Or Tempus Sans.
54. What did you learn from your first job? - Technically, my first job was with my family and helping them at funerals. I learned that because I was afab that I wouldn't get to help with the manual labor. So, I didn't work much and eventually quit going with them after I got fed up with it.
56. Favorite tradition? - I'm not sure if there are any traditions I like. Most of them like Christmas gatherings, Thanksgiving meals, and things like that had me surrounded by racist, homophobic, transphobic people. People that I barely knew and was forced to be around and hug and talk to despite my being perfectly fine with only talking to close family or to no one at all. If I had to choose one, I'd say my family's tradition of yearly crawfish boils with the family. That was actually fun, and plus crawfish... Yum. We haven't done crawfish boils as much since my aunt died, but I hope we do more in the future.
58. Four talents you're peoud of having? - Writing! I'm not sure what else lol. Ig, I can play chess well. I can Google search anything and 96% of the time find what I'm looking for. I can find any movie or tv show, as well as any music.
60. If you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be? - Ooh, definitely fantasy with powers and stuff like that!!!
62. Seven characters you relate to? - Dickon Sowerby from The Secret Garden, Luna Lovegood, Wednesday Addams, the ninth doctor, Alice from Alice in wonderland, Eeyore, and probably Inigo Montoya from The Princess Bride.
64. Favorite website from your childhood? - Poptropica and Cool Math.
66. Favorite flowers? - Honeysuckle, gardenias, carnations, balloon flowers, and zinnias.
68. Worst flavor of any food or drink you've ever tried? - Bubblegum slushie. Tbh it was alright but the aftertaste... Yuck.
70. Left handed or right handed? - Mixed-handed. If you don't know what that is, it's just favoring one hand for certain tasks, and the other for others whereas ambidextrous is beinf able to use either hand effeciently for the same task. For example, I write with my right hand, but I can use my mouse better eith my left. Though, I tend to use my right for that too.
72. Worst subject? - P.e. I have very limited energy as it is so. Being graded on that shit? Yuck.
74. At what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before yiu take an advil or ibuprofen? - So, I'm in pain All the Time. That's just a thing. My average daily pain level is always at 3-4. On a bad day, I can get up to 7. But, I generally don't take anything until I'm at 9. It just seems pointless, because I'll still be in paib regardless. And, I don't want to use certain meds so much that they stop working as well.
76. What's your favorite potato food? (I.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.) - Literally, ALL potato foods. I fucking love potatoes.
78. Coffee from a gas station or sushi from a groxery store? - I don't like sushi period so... Coffee from a gas station.
80. Earth tones or jewel tones?
82. Pc or console? - Console because pcs Confuse me.
84. Podcasts or talk radio? - Lol, neither. I can't process things I hear for Shit even on a good day so. Ye.
86. Cookies of cupcakes?
88. Your greatest wish? - Financial stability.
90. Luckiest mistake? - Tbh, I have a complex about mistakes and try to make 0 mistakes so. Idk. I can't think of any mistake that was lucky. Plenty of ordinary events that turned out really nice, like wearing my pentagram necklace and meeting my friend Brook because of it. But yeah, no mistake I've made has been a lucky one.
92. Lamps, overhead lights, sunlight, or fairy lights? - Ig lamps? I have a salt lamp that's really nice.
94. Favorite season? - Spring!
96. Desktop background? - Uh. I never got around to changing it lol... If I ever do get around to changing it, it'll either be Taehyung or Jungwoo.
98. Favorite historical era? - The 1860s, strictly for the dresses and nothing else.
Thank you for asking these! They took a Hot Minute to do but it was so much fun!!!
weird asks that say a lot
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801
1. Candyland: What is your favorite type of candy? Gummies. I’m not really into chocolate or caramel candies. 2. Chutes & Ladders: Do you have a fear of going up on ladders? Does your house have a laundry chute somewhere? I’ve never had to climb up a ladder but I do think I could just as well have a fear of it since as a kindergartener I was always afraid of going up the jungle gyms. I don’t know what a laundry chute is. 3. Operation: How many surgeries have you had in your lifetime? Zero, thank goodness. The idea of having to be put under and then being sliced open makes me feel faint lmao. 4. Sorry!: Do you sometimes apologize, even when it’s not your fault? Yes, abusive people can make you pick it up as a habit. 5. Game of Life: What is your greatest accomplishment thus far? What do you hope to do with the rest of your life? I count getting into my university as my biggest accomplishment so far, but I know I can still do so much more. I don’t really have a specific career goal, but I do want to ultimately be the best at whatever job I end up in and to be the happy with whoever I end up becoming.
6. Cootie: Did you really used to think that boys/girls had cooties? No...I never heard of those until I was ten watching American cartoons. 7. Trouble: What is something big that you got into a lot of trouble for? My algebra grades in high school. I almost flunked freshman algeb and nearly had to go to summer school. Math was never my strong suit in those days, heh. 8. Puzzles: When was the last time you felt puzzled/confused? How often do you feel like you don’t fit in? The other day while making Gab’s surprise birthday video. I had never made a video before, so the program itself was very foreign to me and at first I doubted I could ever come up with anything. Luckily my sister, who is in film school, was such a big help in helping me get acquainted with the different features and buttons haha. As for feeling like I don’t fit in, I haven’t really felt that a lot in the last couple of years. Other than my experience with AIESEC, I’ve been a lot better in dealing with different groups of people and adjusting to their interests and personalities. 9. Hungry Hungry Hippos: What’s your favorite meal to eat? A nice juicy burger usually works for me. 10. Uno: Can you count to ten in another language? If so, which language? Filipino, Spanish, and Korean. 11. Go Fish!: Have you ever been fishing before? No. I've always lived in the city so I’ve never been exposed to fishing. It’s very common for those living in the province, though. 12. Old Maid: Did you ever have a maid in your house, growing up? We had house help for a short time when we first moved into our house. But because my mom is super organized and very particular about it, we went through like 15 house help in total before she realized she’d rather do everything herself. There were three who stayed longer than a few months because my mom found them very good, but they all wanted to go back to the province eventually so we had to give them up. Most stayed for like a day or two, a week at most. 13. Simon Says: Did you always do everything you were told as a child? I think so, yeah. 14. Red Light, Green Light: When you approach a yellow light, are you more likely to slow down or speed up? Depends if I’m in a hurry or not. 15. Are you any good at jump rope, hopscotch, or hula hooping? Have you ever used a pogo stick before? I can do the first three. I’ve never used a pogo stick and have only seen it in cartoons. Looks fun but I also know I’d break my bones using them lol. 16. Do you prefer chalk or bubbles? Two very different things, but I remember loving bubbles as a kid. My only encounter with chalk was when we’d draw a hopscotch court on the ground, so yeah not a lot of interaction with it. 17. Did you used to go on a lot of bike rides as a child? Not really. My lola always told us we couldn’t go too far away from home, so I followed her. 18. Capture the Flag: What is your country’s flag? What about your state’s flag, if you have one? The Philippine flag has a white triangle at the left side with three stars symbolizing our three main islands, and a sun with its eight rays symbolizing the eight provinces that had big contributions in the 1896 revolution against Spain. On the right, the flag is divided into blue on top symbolizing peace, and red symbolizing patriotism. The two colors can be switched depending if the country’s at war. 19. Tic Tac Toe: When you played, were you the “hugs” or the “kisses”? I dunno, I picked whatever symbol I felt like picking if someone would ask me to play. 20. Have you ever won a game of Marco Polo in the pool without cheating? I’ve never played Marco Polo because I don’t know how the game works. Not very common here. 21. Scrabble: Are you any good at spelling? Yes. I was That student who aced all the spelling quizzes in English class lol. 22. While playing rock, paper, scissors, which do you usually throw down first? I always mix it up. 23. Were you always stuck being the pickle in the middle? I don’t know what this means. 24. Limbo: How low can you go? We never really played this. 25. When playing, did you usually pick “Truth” or “Dare”? Truth, because I have no problem telling it and people usually pick pretty shitty dares for you to do. 26. Have you been involved in any innocent games of Spin the Bottle or 7 Minutes in Heaven? No. Not common games here. I didn’t even know about 7 Minutes in Heaven until I watched 13 Going on 30 when I was like, 14 lolol. 27. Twister: Are you a flexible person (figuratively or literally)? I’m not very physically flexible. I can adjust for a lot of situations, though. 28. Did you used to pretend that the floor was lava? Kinda? In my old school there was a line pattern on the school grounds, and when I would walk I’d try not to hit any of the lines. 29. Guess Who: Are you any good at guessing games? Sure. 30. Clue: Do you think that you would be able to successfully solve a murder case? No, I don’t really like brainteasers like those. 31. Mouse Trap: Have you ever felt trapped before, in some way? Of course, in various ways. I’ve felt trapped at home, in my course, in my own head, etc. 32. Labyrinth: Have you ever gotten lost in a maze? No, that sounds terrifying and just reminds me of The Shining, eugh. 33. Jenga: Are you careful about what choices you make in life? I try to not be reckless, at least. 34. Bop it or Skip-it? Neither. 35. Tag: Are you in shape? Do you enjoy running? I wouldn’t say I am, but my body is also not in an unhealthy shape. I hate running. 36. Kickball: Did you kick the ball over the fence a lot as a kid? No. Houses here don’t really have fences. 37. Are you any good at mini-golf? No, never played. 38. Telephone: What do you do with a rumor once it’s been told to you? I didn’t really get a lot of rumors about me. The one time I did, it was so stupid I told our head teacher about it to put it to rest immediately. 39. Hide and Seek: Have you ever hid so well that it felt like it took somebody forever to find you? What was your best hiding spot? No. I don’t like making people nervous for too long. I didn’t have a hiding spot. 40. What Time Is It, Mr. Fox?: When were you old enough to tell time on an analog clock as opposed to a digital one? Hahahaha I don’t actually remember. I wanna say 8 years old? 41. Mother May I: Did you always ask your parents for permission? Yes. Always better for them to know what I’m up to than sneaking out and being caught. 42. Follow the Leader: Can you be bossy at times? I can be bossy all the time. 43. Monopoly: Are you good with your money/finances? If I absolutely have to save, like if Christmas is coming up, I’ll surprise myself at how good I can be. Most of the time though I like treating myself :/ Lmao. 44. Chess: Have you ever wanted to be king/queen? Only when I was younger. I’d wear a blanket around and pretend it was a cape. 45. Play-doh or Slime? Ooh that’s a toughie, those are my favorite kinds of toys. I did grow up with Play-Doh though and even had a Play-Doh Factory, so I’d go with that. [a-zebra-is-a-striped-horse]
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Ready to answer 151 Questions? 1. When was the last time you swam in a pool? January 2020. 2. Do you like to party? I really enjoy it a lot less than I used to. I would rather be at home with my babies. 3. If your ex suddenly kissed you right now, what would you do? He’s in prison and I’m married and uninterested... SOOOO I would probably slap him. 4. Are you a virgin? I have two kids. So obviously not.
5. What are your parents views on your relationships? I don’t really know what my dad thinks. My mom goes back and forth. She loves Jacob and knows I love him, but hates the way he treats me a majority of the time.
6. If you ran into your current boyfriend/crush in 10 years, would you marry them? I’m married. So... there’s that. 7. Is your best friend dating anyone? My mom is married to my dad. Jacob is married to me. And Kayla is back with her youngest’s dad, which is cool. 8. Describe the shirt you’re wearing? Big and dark gray. 9. Do people who wear Hollister and Abrerbrombie every day bother you? I don’t care what other people wear. 10. Could you go out in public without wearing make-up? I do that every single day. It’s very rare for me to wear makeup. 11. What is one feature that you don’t like? On myself... I hate my teeth and gums. 12. Would people describe you as happy? They might. 13. Are you single? I’m very not single. 14. Does it bother you that pretty much every survey you take asks if you’re single? Not really. I mean. It gets a bit annoying because it’s a boring question but it’s also whatever. 15. Do you have Tumblr? Obviously.
16. What about Xanga? Nope. 17. Have you ever babysat before? Many, many times. 18. Is there a teacher who you absolutely hate? There were some teachers I haven’t enjoyed having in the past. 19. Ever shopped at Sephora? I bought a gift card for Kay once. 20. If your current boyfriend/crush suddenly moved away, what would you do? I’m assuming I’d move with him since we’re married..
21. Do you have any university plans?
I am currently getting my master’s degree in marriage and family therapy. Have no plans to go beyond that.
22. If your best friend revealed she was a homosexual, what would you do?
It would completely shock me if my mom did, although our relationship wouldn’t change. If Jacob did, I would probably be devastated since we’ve been together so long and have two kids... I wouldn’t care much if Kay did.
23. What are your views on sex?
It’s fine if you’re both of age and it’s consensual. I don’t have much of a sex drive these days, which upsets Jacob sometimes. But I’m just so tired. All the time.
24. Do sexual questions bother you?
Nope.
25. Would you rather have sex with your boyfriend or break up?
He’s my husband, and I don’t want a divorce.
26. Have you ever dreamed about your wedding?
I did when I was younger and again when we got engaged.
27. Does it bother you when people TYpe 1yk dis’?
I don’t enjoy it, but you can do what you want, as long as you’re not hurting other people.
28. Do you delete pictures of you and your exes off of Facebook?
I have never had to deal with that, so I’m not sure what I would do.
29. Would you ever date a friends Ex?
I feel like there would be a lot of things that would factor into that decision, but currently, nope.
30. What’s the last book you read?
I don’t remember. It was a children’s book at work.
31. Ready for 10 simple questions?
Sure thing.
32. What is your last name?
Shh.
33. What grade are you in?
I just started my first year of graduate school about 3 weeks ago.
34. What school do you go to?
Northcentral University.
35. Summer, Fall, Winter or Spring?
Spring and Fall are my favorites.
36. Favorite Color?
Black and blue.
37. Are your parents together?
They are.
38. Any siblings?
Four sisters and one brother. All younger.
39. Favorite subject?
I’ve always loved all things psychology related, except research methods, and english.
40. Least favorite subject? All things math. 41. Favorite song? Slow Down by Nichole. 42. Okay. Simple questions are over. Happy? I don’t care. 43. How many friends do you have on Facebook? No clue. 44. Ever been requested by some old guy from another country? Yeah. 45. Have you ever googled yourself? Yup. 46. Have a Formspring? Nope. 47. You’re offered free tickets to a Justin Bieber concert. What do you do? Sell them if they don’t want to. 48. Would you rather spend the day at an amusement park or a water park? Either!!! 49. Been to Disney world? No but I will someday! 50. If someone posts their status “9 Inches :(” do you know what they mean? Nope. 51. Ever had a boyfriend? Yes.
52. Ever had a huge crush on someone who still doesn’t know? Yeah. 53. Have you done something in the last week that you regret? Yeah. Yelled at my kids... 54. Ever drank alcohol? Yup. 55. Know anyone who’s currently doing drugs? Weed at least. 56. Ever watched The Hills? Nope. 57. What about Jersey Shore? Nope. 58. Ever called someone a slut? Not seriously that I recall. 59. What do you think of short shorts? Not for me. 60. Does it bother you if people swear around you? Nope. 61. Have you ever gotten an A in a subject? Many times. 62. What about a B? ^^^ 63. And a C? A few. 64. How about a D? No. 65. Ever skived? Huh? 66. Would you consider yourself popular and outcast or somewhere in the middle? Outcast for sure. 67. Are most of your friends older or younger than you? My age. Or older. 68. Ever been stabbed in the back by a close friend? Yup. 69. Do you think it’s immature when people laugh at the number 69? Kind of. 70. Ever watched porn? Yeah. Wasn’t into it. 71. How many laws do you think you’ve broken in the past month? Speeding. 72. Do you wake up with an alarm clock? Yup. 73. Do you prefer Wednesdays or Thursdays? Wednesdays. Jacob has them off from Papa John’s. 74. If your school had a Glee Club would you join? Not likely. 75. Ever performed in a talent show? No. 76. Have you ever cried in public? Yeah. I hate it too. 77. Do you have a favorite between your Mom and your Dad? No, although I’m closer to my mom. 78. Would you audition for a reality talent competition? I did and didn’t get past the producers. 79. How many celebrity crushes have you had? A lot. 80. How many non-celebrity crushes have you had? A lot. 81. Name 5 male celebrities who you think are attractive. Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki, Misha Collins, Chris Pratt, and Johnny Depp. 82. Name 5 female celebrities who you think are attractive. Kirsten Vangsness, Monica Raymund, Hilary Duff, I can’t think of more. 83. Ever been compared to a celebrity? Nooo. 84. Have any embarrassing pictures on Facebook? I don’t think so. 85. Do you think spending £20 on Lip Gloss is a waste of money? I wouldn’t do it. 86. Are you opinionated? On some things. 87. Do you have a favorite store? Children clothing stores, like Carter’s or the Children’s Place. Barnes and Noble. 88. Would you ever wear Flare Jeans? Not likely. 89. Do you own jeans that aren’t skinny? I have a couple boot cut pairs. 90. Have you ever worn the same outfit twice in one week? I pretty much wear the same few outfits all week. I only have so many work appropriate shirts. 91. What’s the longest period of time you’ve been away from school? I graduated college in 2016 and just went back to get my master’s about three weeks ago. 92. Do you google abbreviations you don’t understand? Yeah. 93. Does it bother you when people have cats as their profile picture? Nope. Why would it? 94. Own a pair of converse? I do. They’re my favorite. 95. Is there a teacher at your school who has obvious favorites? What I am doing now is online and not like a typically school.
96. If yes, are you one of them? ^^^
97. Do you text in class? I did. And I do text while doing school stuff now, although not often. 98. What brand of jeans do you wear the most? I don’t know. I don’t pay attention to brands. 99. At what point do you think sizes are “Plus Sized?” I don’t know. 100. Do you want to lose weight? Yeah, I do. A lot of it. Like. 100 pounds. Ha. 101. Ever seen a therapist? I have. 102. Ever watched porn? I have, but not really for myself. I didn’t really enjoy it. 103. Ever purposely ignored a text? I have. 104. A facebook message? I have. 105. A poke? Yup. 106. A friend request? Many times. 107. Would you say you read into things too much? Oh, I’m sure. 108. Is your best friend more likely to be the one suggesting something stupid or refusing to do something stupid? Suggesting. 109. Do you have a “fun friend?” (A friend who you have tons of fun with but you never really have deep conversations?) I don’t think so. 110. Ever been called a bully? Not that I can recall. Because I never bullied people. 111. Ever purposely hurt yourself? Many times. 112. Ever gone to church? I used to. Years ago. 113. Would you call either of your parents screw ups? NO. 114. If you turned out exactly like your mom would you be pleased? I would not want to be exactly like her. But there are a lot of good things I would be happy to inherit. 115. What do you want to do with your life? I’m going to become a marriage and family therapist.
116. Let me guess… You have brown hair? I do. 117. Already know what you’re being for Halloween? I don’t dress up. My kids do though. I don’t know what they’re going to be. Wyatt might be spiderman again. 118. Do you still go Trick or Treating? I take my babies. 119. Ever liked someone WAY older than you? Celebrities. 120. Does it bother you when people have really loud conversations on the bus? I don’t really care. 121. When you have sunglasses on, do you stare at people? I do not. 122. Ever had a credit card denied? Probably. 123. What’s the last movie you watched? I don’t remember. 124. Last TV Show? Uhhh. Maybe Criminal Minds? 125. You see your Ex making out with one of your friends. What do you do? I wouldn’t likely care. 126. Ever been called a whore? I don’t think so. But it’s possible. 127. Are you american? I am. 128. Ever made yourself throw up? Yeah. 129. Have you ever kissed someone who wasn’t your boyfriend? On a dare - Kayla and/or Brittany. 130. Are you Cute or Gross? Gross. 131. Does it bother you when people say “LOOK HOW MUCH YOU’VE GROWN!”? It’s been years since anyone said that, but no, it didn’t bother me. 132. Can you say intelligent things around the guy you like? We’re married and have been together many years. I would hope I could have intelligent conversations with him at this point. 133. Ever had the lead in a play? No. 134. What about a solo in a concert? I did once in high school. 135. What kind of a student are you? I’m a good student. I’ve always done very well. 136. Worst subject? I have always hated math. 137. Best subject? English or history. 138. Ever had a crush on a teacher? No. 139. Would it bother you if you found out that your mother was pregnant? It’s super impossible so I would be pretty confused. 140. How late do you sleep in? I have to be up by 7:20ish. 141. Do you edit your profile pictures before posting them? Sometimes I use filters. 142. Be 100% honest. Do you have any friends who are uglier than you? I am the ugly friend, 100%. 143. Do you believe in love? Obviously. 144. Would you consider yourself a good student? Yeah.. 145. Does it bother you when Surveys ask “Did you like this survey?” I don’t care. 146. Salty, Sweet, Sour or Spicy? Depends on my mood but usually salty or sweet. 147. Are you going into High School this year? Nope. Graduated 2012. 148. What about Junior High? Heck no. Ha. 149. What is one thing someone could say to you right now that would make you cry? That someone I love was seriously hurt or died. 150. Where did you find this note? @lovemesomesurveys :) 151. Last question. How many unread messages are in your phone? I have no idea since Wyatt is using it.
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Thank you @ifindus for tagging me 🌼 and sorry about the 9. question: I couldn’t describe the situation wtih any less words 😅. Still, I had fun with all of this!
🌸🌸🌸
1) What’s your favourite place in the world?
Stony shores and raised bogs: just a good broad red-coloured raised bog full of cranberries and hare's-tail cottongrass and if you bother to look a little closer then you’ll notice the tiny pink sundews glistening in the sun. And the smell of both the raised bog and the sea is just the best. So soothing.
2) What’s your favourite book?
“Pokuraamat” (“The Poku Book”) by Edgar Valter probably XD Idk but it was my fave as I was a child and the aesthetic is still deeply engraved into my heart <3 I actually adore “Memoirs of Ivan Orav or the Past as Azure Mountains” by Andrus Kivirähk as well. I love history so a good parody about our tragic past is just my jam. I mean what else there is to do to just laugh about it all and move one. No one cares about the little nations anyways.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
3) What’s a guilty pleasure you have?
I wouldn’t deem it that guilty of a pleasure since I’ll always stay a child in my heart (I promised Pippi!) but anything “childish”, if you may, I still enjoy even though I’m a grown up now. Like playing on a playground or tag with friends. The only tragic thing is that I don’t have anyone to “play” with since everyone is too busy being “grown up” and thinking about their image in front of strangers. Well, at least I know how to still enjoy life. 😛
4) What’s your favourite snacks?
Blueberries, blackcurrants and gooseberries. Sadly it’s the type of snack you won’t get fresh the whole year.
5) Do you have any musicals you like?
To be honest I haven’t seen that many but the most recent ones I adored were Hamilton and Les Misérables. The last one I got to see in real life and damn the actor for Javert and his costume were hot! (Guess his songs helped to create this chilly atmosphere full of authority)
6) Do you have any games you like?
Since it’s me we’re only talking about board games. I love Dixit a lot. There’s like four extensions to it on my shelf.
7) What are you most looking forward to do after this pandemic is over?
Since my time during the quarantine was dedicated to Zoom seminars and writing my thesis I’m planning on resting when I’m finally finished with the latter. I’d like to go hiking and dedicate more time to drawing and writing fanfiction since I’ve come up with so many new ideas for stories over this time under quarantine.
8) What’s your favourite disney movie?
🐉🗡️ MULAN !!!!!! 100% NO questions asked! It always was and always will be my favourite. Still, an honorary mention will be given to Atlantis as well.
9) What are you most proud of in your life?
In the 7. grade I went to the German Department in my school which basically meant that all the main subjects were in German with German teachers from Germany. So the 7. grade me was quite shooketh with the sudden intense German 24/7 and when my Math teacher asked me a question and I didn’t know the answer to it I went red in my face. The teacher noticed it and with a loud voice told the whole class “Haha, your face is as red as a lobster!!” ...okay, teacher. It happened once more only this time it was “Haha, your face is as red as your deskmate’s sweater!!” Since that day I decided to hide my emotions from that teacher as well as I could and never speak in his class or else he’s gonna comment on something that I can’t really change in front of everyone again. I mastered the art of “I have no emotions” and actually never spoke in his class again. The thing was that this type of handling the teachers I soon started to practice in other German subjects as well because most of the teachers happened to be difficult persons which meant that the perfect way to deal with them without any problems was silently obeying. I mastered that as well. Now, the problem was that for Germans speaking is apparently a very important part of the class. 50% of the grade of one subject consisted of only speaking in class. And I HATED that. Still do! Because it didn’t matter if you perfectly and carefully summed up everything in one sentence. The only way you were valid in the eyes of the German teachers was when you talked a lot, even if it was just straight up bullshit. I’ve never been the type of a guy to just talk about something, I need to get straight to the point and that didn’t go well with the teachers. Basically, everyone thought that I just wasn’t good enough in German so that’s why I never talked.
Now fast forward to the end of the 12. grade where we were taking our Abitur and specifically the speaking part of the German exam which consisted of 20 min non-stop talking about a literary piece we were handed 15 min prior. No doubt no one had any faith in my German skills because I had never talked in the class that much. And boy how everyone in the room was shook when the results were announced and I actually was the second best with my score in the speaking part in the whole class full of literal geniuses. My German Literature teacher seeked my out twice, once even during the after-party of our graduation, to ask “How did you do that?” The second time he asked I decided that I’ve had enough with playing this obedient silent student and told him that I started learning 3 days before the exam day (which was outrageous by the standards of my German teachers) and that I actually never read more that one chapter from one of the four books that were chosen for our Abitur because I hated it so much. And you know how he answered? He said a tiny “oh” and walked silently away. No comments. No nothing. I felt so empowered. So alive suddenly. It was the last day I had to see those teachers in my life and I actually threw away my shackles and for once said what I actually thought into their face. I’ll probably always deem this moment as the proudest moments I’ve ever had.
10) What makes you happy?
🎶 Singing. I have been in a choir since I was 3, for two years I was in a school band and every now and then I would perform during public ceremonies in school or for the important guests there. I’ve never officially learned singing anywhere but experience is a good teacher as well :) Singing is one of the few things that always helps me forget my problems and makes everything feel so much better.
Hiking in nature makes me content as well. I dare to say that I am quite a nature loving person. Just hand me my camera and the normally 30 min long stroll through the woods will turn into a 3 hour long session of capturing the tiniest details the forest has to offer.
Travelling is a passion of mine as well but I’m not rich so yeah there’s that…
🌸🌸🌸
I’m tagging @justajojokejobro, @kakashis-kunoichi, @sand-rose, @succulentbutt, @who-let-the-deans-out-doctor-who, @louiserandom, @hokutodecuisine, @raven1aris and anyone else who wants to participate!
My questions for you can be found under the cut:
1) What is your favourite kind of cake?
2) What language would you want to magically learn overnight and why?
3) What do you think about Eurovision? (Do you have any favourite performances?)
4) What is the best food your mother/grandmother makes/has made?
5) Do you have any people in your family tree whose history is interesting or about who you know a funny story you would like to share?
6) Do you collect anything?
7) What are you good at?
8) What is something you are trying to achieve or master at the moment?
9) Is there something weird/uncommon that you like/do?
10) What makes you happy?
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1641.
1. Have you ever had someone pick you up off the ground & carried you? no 2. Are you a flirty person? no 3. Do you like coffee? How about tea? i love coffee and tea’s okay 4. Where exactly was your first kiss? a dude’s living room 5. The last store you went to was…? kroger
6. A name you hate with a passion? Shannon 7. Do you have a friend named Alex? yeah 8. The last person you held hands with? my husband 9. How about the last movie you saw? Onward 10. Did you like it? yeah it was cute and sad 11. What is your favorite type of water (ex. arrowhead)? um kroger brand lol 12. Have you ever been to Warped Tour? yes 13. Do you know anyone who wears fur? No. 14. When was the last time you were on myspace.com? umm 2009? 15. How often do you cuss? lately pretty often 16. Have you ever cussed out a teacher? no 17. Do you know how many kids are at your school? - 18. What did you think of the movie Juno? i love that movie 19. When was the last time you had butterflies? idk 20. How often do you eat meat? almost every day 21. What grade did you meet your best friend in? Sami - 7th; Britt - college 22. Would rather be loved or love someone? both 23. Last time you cleaned your room? idk 24. Have you ever gotten clothes from the kids section of Target when you were over the age of 10? probably 25. Are you more of a science/math person or english/history person? Or how about science/history or something like that? english and history person 26. What is your biggest fear? losing people i love 27. Have you ever been cheated om in a relationship? yeah 28. Your favorite children’s book you ever read? harry potter 29. When you were little, would you have rather watched Cartoon Network or Disney Channel? Disney Channel. 30. Do you shave your arms? No. 31. Since using the internet regularly, have you started to read less than you used to? no 32. Are you a big fan of the Harry Potter series? it’s my fav 33. How often would say you pulled all-nighters, if you ever do? i’ve done it a few times but not on purpose. 34. Do you wear make-up on a daily basis? no
35. Has a friend’s boyfriend/girlfriend ever had a problem with you for any reason? i have no idea 36. How old were you when you learned to drive? 19 37. How many times a day do you find yourself cracking your joints, if at all? a lot 38. Do you find yourself feeling lazier when the weather is warm? i’m always lazy so 39. Is there a particular sport you follow on a regular basis? no 40. Are you a fan of the TV show Friends? no 41. How old do you think is too old to sleep with a stuffed animal? well i’m 29 and sleep with 2 regularly so...idc 42. If AC wasn’t an option, would you rather sleep with a fan on or with the windows open? i’d rather go get an ac unit lol 43. Do you find it hard to fall asleep when you know you have to be up earlier than normal? yeah 44. Do you style your hair in the same way every day, or do you prefer to switch it up? i switch to a bun sometimes
45. Are you 100% over the last person you kissed? no 46. Are you currently looking forward to anything? no 47. Ever receive a really long apology? yeah 48. What were you doing at 7:45AM this morning? sleeping 49. Do you put ketchup on top of your french fries or on the side? neither 50. Who was the last person you talked to in person? my husband 51. How many tattoos would you like to have? my entire body covered 52. Have you ever hung out with someone just to hang out? yeah... 53. Would you be mad if your best friend dated your crush? well Sami is married and Britt is a lesbian so i don’t think either of them would date my husband 54. Do you wish you were somewhere else right now? No. 55. What was the last thing you drank? mtn dew 56. Do you laugh a lot? not really 57. Do you have a dog? no 58. Do you like orange juice? yeah 59. Would you rather have big or small dogs? medium 60. Have you ever slept in someone else’s bed? Yes. 61. When was the last time you cried? today 62.Are you over the age of 25? yeah 63. Do you like your first name? yeah
64. Do you wear glasses? Yes. 65. Do you think you’re wasting your time on the person you like? nope 66. Do you/have you ever liked/been in love with someone older than you? yup 67. Did you enjoy your summer? probably not 68. How’s your heart lately? healthy as far as i know 68. Do you want your life to stay the way it is right now forever? NO THANK YOU 69. Are you a jealous person? i can be 70. Are you ready to get out of this town? no 71. Have you had alcohol in the last 48 hours? lol yeah 72. Do you currently have a hickey? No. 73. Would you rather live without music or without the t.v? music 74. Are you one of those people who obsesses over Hollister? no
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the thing about having a condition that makes your fine motor control skills and gross motor skills/hand-eye coordination hella bad is that it’s hell going through school. like in sport I was consistently told that I was a failure bc i struggled to catch a ball and I only caught on how to use a skipping rope by year 4/when I was 10 years old. to my teachers I never “trying hard enough” or “always letting down the team” in games like basketball or footy or god knows what else.
then when it came to basic handwriting, I was always made the example of “THIS IS NOT WHAT TO DO IN YOUR BOOKS CHILDREN!!!” in front of the class bc i wrote over the margins of the pages in my book to keep my writing in the lines, my writing wasn’t small and neat like every other girl’s HW. instead mine was clumsy, loud and messy, too large to be any type of acceptable. so I was always told that I “wouldn’t get anywhere” if I continued to write like that. my maths book was a fucking nightmare to look at bc I couldn’t write in a straight line without lines on a page. I couldn’t draw shapes (or even trace shapes) properly. I struggled to rule straight lines for tables/graphs and shit in maths. but instead when I fought back to my teacher’s ripping my pages out bc it “WANST NEAT ENOUGH” with “I literally can’t help it though!!! it’s in my (fucking) medical stuff!!! IM TELLING THE TRUTH!!” i was told to go outside and think about the consequences of talking back to my teacher. when all I wanted was to be believed, for fucks sake. science in high school was much the same.
in year 6, we had had to do a sewing project. my hands shook too much to put the needle through the holes on the cross stitch thing that we had of a penguin. I couldn’t get the needle through the cross stitch thing in general or get the thread through the needle etc. all bc my fine motor control skills were awful. but what did I get from my teacher? the “you’re such an embarrassment/failure” speech. “everyone should be able to do this by 12. what’s wrong with you? you failure of a child. im embarrassed for you. everyone else can do it, why can’t you? you’re just being lazy and you’ll never be a real woman bc you can’t sew! what an embarrassing thing for you!” when I had to have my teacher and other students do it for me. like sorry I have a condition that makes me unable to perform ~womanly~ duties miss sanderson. go fuck yourself. and also i’m pretty sure we’re in the 2000s and not the 1800s? so sewing is something I don’t really have to KNOW by 12 years old????? fuck off.
when it came to high school it got worse. my year 7 geography teacher (who I also had in year 9 for commerce) constantly made it seem like I was less intelligent than everyone else just because my handwriting was messy and also because i struggled to draw maps to scale. again, when I fought back with my “I can’t help it it’s medical” I was branded a liar and told to shut up and go outside to reflect on my behaviour. although I’m actually leaving out how the school I moved to (which was part of the catholic education office etc like my primary school) refused me access to the computer that the primary school had given me the year previously, SPECIFICALLY to help me with high school. I have no idea if it had anything to do with funding or whatever like they ~said~ it did.... but I always felt like they were too lazy to help me. like i was just meant to get bullied by staff lmao. generally from every other teacher I got: “will you EVER take ANY pride in your work? ugh, you lazy kid 🙄.” in a super snide voice. anyway moving on.
next comes art and tech (like wood-shop/metal-shop etc for americans). in year 7 art, I was screamed at by the male teacher I had bc I couldn’t weave a fucking wicker basket. “YOU’LL NEVER AMOUNT TO ANYTHING IF YOU CAN’T WEAVE A BASKET!!! YOU STUPID CHILD!!!” like???? I don’t even need to know how to weave a basket mr hellick but what-the-fuck-ever. i struggled to get the fronds together etc of the basket etc, so again i had to get my friends to help me or that teacher to help me weave it. like. you fucking asshole, im trying but I literally cannot do it. in year 10 art, i was made to finger paint my rock-pool painting bc “you just have no control over a paintbrush, do you? ugh when will you learn to be neat 🙄? also honey you have to wear gloves while doing it!!! you don’t want to get it all over your hands or yourself!” like yes I agreed bc it was fun and messy (ngl).... but when everyone else was doing intricate shit that 15/16 year olds can and should do, i was the 5 year old.... i was treated like a toddler just because i couldn’t sketch properly and couldn’t hold a paintbrush ~properly~ or some bullshit. and also the paint is non-toxic. and im not stupid enough to drink it or whatever the fuck you think im going to do... for the reminder about wearing gloves (also it was partly health & safety but still). they usually mocked my artwork anyway and called it ~abstract in a way~ bc i couldn’t draw well enough to make anything distinguishable, unlike my sister who for some teachers was an art prodigy. “why can’t you draw like your sister? her art was always good!” um probably bc my sister doesn’t have my condition and she’s always been good at drawing? and also i’m just not my sister? god. fuck you.”
then we get to tech (woodshop/metalshop etc). in this typically all male environment (for teachers anyway), my work was again marked out as “what not to do!” in year 7 tech. the teacher I had in that always mocked that my cutting of wood wasn’t “straight” and that it never matched up etc. “like what grade are you even attempting to pull with that piece of garbage?” fuck off, mr finkelstein, ugh. in metalwork I could only saw my chimes which turned into crowbars for like 5 minutes each bc it made me tired in that interval, while everyone else could saw for like 20 minutes straight. so I had to get other people to saw for me from time to time, so in the end that project was never finished. I was made to look lazy when I didn’t have the stamina or the strength for that assignment. finally there’s plastics, where I couldn’t use the glue gun or the soldering iron bc I both shook too much and my hand was too weak to use it after some other students in my class. so again, my friends had to solder for me or do the glue gun for me. I technically failed that subject too bc I “wasn’t engaged enough” or w/e and also bc I ended up burning my leg by loading a glue gun over it 😅.
by the back end of high school I was straight up told that I was “going to fail” externally marked exams (the school certificate that not longer exists and the HSC) bc they simply wouldn’t take the time and effort to read my work. do you know how degrading that is? like fuck, excuse me while I don’t fucking bother to study if they’re going to straight up fail me (which never happened anyway.) but at least the public school i moved to actually fucking fought for me to get a computer for my end of high school (hsc) exams, where as the catholic school just went on with the “you’re going to fail your school certificate writing the way you do!” and tried to get me to use a writer (another person obvs) as did the public school. but god it’s fucking impossible no matter how much you study, to articulate your thoughts under exam pressure to someone else. just let me write lol.
but my point is that, in all of these subjects I was trying harder than most people (not counting sport lmao), but the mess etc that was caused by my condition... and how it was treated as a lie or an “excuse” for me to get out of things by my teachers was awful. when in fact, it was a real problem that i had several years of medical appointments with a specialist doctor, an occupational therapist and assistive technology (well in primary school anyway) and loads of tests and shit done for.
so if you’re a teacher or are currently training to be a teacher, if you have a kid like this in your class/es please don’t be this awful towards them, please know they’re trying their best.
#life#about me#shut up ilona#ilona actually shares her life with her followers for once lol#ilona whines about her shitty life to her followers lol#but seriously though#my teachers always wondered why i had low self esteem#and mentally i was always like ‘it’s because you consistently call me a failure?’#like you really expect me to have a healthy level of SE when all you do is call me a failure etc?#like how the fuck is that supposed to fucking work?#this is a tl;dr post for people on this site that hate reading longform posts
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Ready to answer 151 Questions? 1. When was the last time you swam in a pool? Like 6/7 years ago. 2. Do you like to party? My idea of a party is a small get together with friends just chillin’ with food and music. Maybe play some boardgames. Just super laid back. Crazy party scenes with a shitload of people I don’t even know is not my thing at all. That all being said, I haven’t been to a party in like 3 years. 3. If your ex suddenly kissed you right now, what would you do? I can’t even imagine a scenario where that would happen now. We haven’t talked or seen each other in almost 5 years. For that to happen, that would mean we were talking and hanging out again and yeah, don’t see that happening. Plus, SO much has changed for the both of us. Our ship sailed a longggg time ago. 4. Are you a virgin? Yes. 5. What are your parents views on your relationships? Ty and I never dated, but my parents really liked him. My mom definitely thought something was going on and she was rooting for us, ha.
6. If you ran into your current boyfriend/crush in 10 years, would you marry them? I don’t have a boyfriend or a crush right now. But also, I wouldn’t just marry someone I bumped into 10 years later. Like, a LOT would have changed in that amount of time. Just because I dated or was interested in someone doesn’t mean things would be the same seeing each other that many years later. Would the feelings come back? Would we still vibe? What are we doing in our life at that time? Are we both single? 7. Is your best friend dating anyone? My mom has been with my dad for over 30 years. 8. Describe the shirt you’re wearing? It’s a tie-shirt with pastel colors. 9. Do people who wear Hollister and Abrerbrombie every day bother you? I really don’t care. 10. Could you go out in public without wearing make-up? I’ve been doing that for the past few years. To think that there was a time I would have never done that... 11. What is one feature that you don’t like? On me? I mean, everything, but my smile/teeth for one. 12. Would people describe you as happy? No. 13. Are you single? Yep. 14. Does it bother you that pretty much every survey you take asks if you’re single? Yes or questions about relationships. 15. Do you have Tumblr? Duhhh.
16. What about Xanga? Aww, RIP Xanga. 17. Have you ever babysat before? Yeah, my younger brother and a couple of my cousins when they were kids. 18. Is there a teacher who you absolutely hate? I had two awful math professors in community college. Like, they were horrible. 19. Ever shopped at Sephora? Yeah. 20. If your current boyfriend/crush suddenly moved away, what would you do? 21. Do you have any university plans? I graduated with my BA five years ago. I’m not going any further. 22. If your best friend revealed she was a homosexual, what would you do? I mean, it would definitely come as a huge shock if my mom came out now. Of course it wouldn’t change anything between us, but things would be different for awhile. Like, it would take time to get used to a new normal, one where she’s not with my dad who she’s been with for over 30 years and one where she’s with a woman. 23. What are your views on sex? Be safe. If you’re an adult and it’s consensual then I don’t see an issue. 24. Do sexual questions bother you? No. I just don’t have much to say on the matter. 25. Would you rather have sex with your boyfriend or break up? Wth. 26. Have you ever dreamed about your wedding? Nope. 27. Does it bother you when people TYpe 1yk dis’? Omg. I’m so glad I don’t see that anymore. That seemed to die when Myspace did. 28. Do you delete pictures of you and your exes off of Facebook? There’s still photos of Joseph and I. *shrug* 29. Would you ever date a friends Ex? No. 30. What’s the last book you read? The Girl and the Hunt by AJ Rivers. 31. Ready for 10 simple questions? Sure. 32. What is your last name? Stephanie. 33. What grade are you in? I graduated college 5 years ago, I’m done. 34. What school do you go to? 35. Summer, Fall, Winter or Spring? Fall and winter. 36. Favorite Color? Pastels, rose gold, yellow, coral, mint green. 37. Are your parents together? Yes. 38. Any siblings? I have two brothers. 39. Favorite subject? Psychology.
40. Least favorite subject? Math. 41. Favorite song? I could never just choose one. 42. Okay. Simple questions are over. Happy? I don’t care. 43. How many friends do you have on Facebook? 150ish. 44. Ever been requested by some old guy from another country? They weren’t old, but yeah I’ve had several requests from men from other countries. 45. Have you ever googled yourself? Yeah. 46. Have a Formspring? I used to. I suppose it still exists out there since I never deleted it. I haven’t been on there in several years, though. 47. You’re offered free tickets to a Justin Bieber concert. What do you do? Probably decline the offer. I actually do like both his current and previous album, but I don’t know if I’d want to go to his concert. *shrug* I also don’t know anyone who would go with me and I wouldn’t go alone. 48. Would you rather spend the day at an amusement park or a water park? Amusement park. I don’t do water slides and whatnot. 49. Been to Disney world? Nope, but I’d love to go. I’ve been to Disneyland several times, though. 50. If someone posts their status “9 Inches :(” do you know what they mean? Sounds like one of those things where people post a random status from a list of things that will likely get people’s attention and whoever comments on it is privately sent said list of thing and they then choose something to post as their status and so on. That was a popular game thing on Facebook years ago. 51. Ever had a boyfriend? Yes.
52. Ever had a huge crush on someone who still doesn’t know? I’ve had crushes on guys who never knew, but the really serious ones (there were 5) all knew. 53. Have you done something in the last week that you regret? Yes. 54. Ever drank alcohol? Yeah. I drank in my early 20s until I was 24. 55. Know anyone who’s currently doing drugs? Yeah. 56. Ever watched The Hills? Yeah, the OG one and the reboot that came out last year. 57. What about Jersey Shore? No, I never got into that one. 58. Ever called someone a slut? I’ve said that jokingly to friends. 59. What do you think of short shorts? I don’t wear them. Or any length of shorts. 60. Does it bother you if people swear around you? No. I think it’s funny because my dad is still weird about cussing in front of me and so is our family friend. She always apologizes to me if she does it. 61. Have you ever gotten an A in a subject? I mostly got A’s and B’s throughout school with some C’s because of stupid math. 62. What about a B? ^^^ 63. And a C? ^^^ 64. How about a D? No. 65. Ever skived? What’s that? 66. Would you consider yourself popular and outcast or somewhere in the middle? I’d say I was the outcast. I mean, I had some friends, but I really just didn’t stand out or fit in. 67. Are most of your friends older or younger than you? My friends were my age or a year younger. Ty was the only one who was older than me (just by a year). 68. Ever been stabbed in the back by a close friend? Yes. 69. Do you think it’s immature when people laugh at the number 69? I have my immature moments, too. That one doesn’t do it for me, though. 70. Ever watched porn? I’ve seen it, but it wasn’t for my viewing pleasure or anything. I just personally don’t get the appeal. 71. How many laws do you think you’ve broken in the past month? I don’t think I’ve broken any. I don’t do anything or go anywhere, ha. 72. Do you wake up with an alarm clock? Yeah. I’d sleep later than 3PM if I didn’t and I don’t know, for some reason I don’t want to. Not like I have anything better to do, but *shrug* 73. Do you prefer Wednesdays or Thursdays? Makes no difference to me. 74. If your school had a Glee Club would you join? No. I can’t sing. I’m surprised I did choir for a few years in elementary school. 75. Ever performed in a talent show? My 2nd grade class did. We did “This Little Light of Mine” with a few very simple hand movements that went along with it. 76. Have you ever cried in public? Yeah. For the most part it’s only been at funerals and doctor appointments, but there have been a few other times in public where I felt the tears coming and tried to fight them back, but they started coming out anyway. I’m definitely someone who doesn’t like to cry in front of other people, so when it happens then you know it’s bad. 77. Do you have a favorite between your Mom and your Dad? I love both of my parents, but my mom and I have a closer relationship. She’s my best friend. I truly don’t know what I’d do without her. 78. Would you audition for a reality talent competition? Nooo. I have zero talent. 79. How many celebrity crushes have you had? A lot. 80. How many non-celebrity crushes have you had? A lot. 81. Name 5 male celebrities who you think are attractive. Alexander Skarsgard, Henry Cavill, Chris Evans, Matt Bomer, and Chris Pratt. 82. Name 5 female celebrities who you think are attractive. Margot Robbie, Jennifer Lopez, Ariana Grande, Hailey Baldwin, and Natalie Portman. 83. Ever been compared to a celebrity? Ha, no. 84. Have any embarrassing pictures on Facebook? If someone uploads a photo of me that I don’t approve of it gets deleted asap. 85. Do you think spending £20 on Lip Gloss is a waste of money? That’s too much to me. 86. Are you opinionated? I do have my opinions I feel strongly about, but I also consider myself to be openminded. I’m open to hearing different sides of things. I want to. And it’s certainly possible for my opinion to change. 87. Do you have a favorite store? BoxLunch, Hot Topic, Kohl’s, Target, and Bath & Body Works. 88. Would you ever wear Flare Jeans? No. 89. Do you own jeans that aren’t skinny? Nope. 90. Have you ever worn the same outfit twice in one week? Yeah. *gasp* Call the fashion police! 91. What’s the longest period of time you’ve been away from school? Well, I graduated college 5 years ago if that counts. But if you mean like while I was still going to school, then a few months. I had to miss school 3 times for a few months because I had to have surgery. One of the times was when I was supposed to start UC, but ended up having to start the following semester instead. 92. Do you google abbreviations you don’t understand? Yeah. 93. Does it bother you when people have cats as their profile picture? I don’t care? 94. Own a pair of converse? Yes. 95. Is there a teacher at your school who has obvious favorites? 96. If yes, are you one of them? 97. Do you text in class? I never did that. I was a goody-goody lol. 98. What brand of jeans do you wear the most? I haven’t worn jeans at all in like 3 years, ha, but anyway most of my jeans are the Arizona brand from JCP. They’re the perfect fit for me and they’re reasonably priced. 99. At what point do you think sizes are “Plus Sized?” According to Google, it starts at size 16. 100. Do you want to lose weight? Nooo. I’m too underweight as it is. I need to gain weight. 101. Ever seen a therapist? No, but I should. 102. Ever watched porn? Yeah, I’ve seen some of it. I didn’t watch out of enjoyment, though. I don’t get the appeal, personally. 103. Ever purposely ignored a text? Yes. 104. A facebook message? Yes. 105. A poke? I always ignored those. That was a dumb feature Facebook had. 106. A friend request? Yeah. I don’t accept a request from anyone I don’t know. 107. Would you say you read into things too much? Yepppp. 108. Is your best friend more likely to be the one suggesting something stupid or refusing to do something stupid? Refusing. 109. Do you have a “fun friend?” (A friend who you have tons of fun with but you never really have deep conversations?) No. 110. Ever been called a bully? No. 111. Ever purposely hurt yourself? Yes. 112. Ever gone to church? Yes. I used to go sometimes with both sets of grandparents when I was a kid. They were of different religions, so that began my complicated and non-existent relationship with religion. That changed a few years ago, though, and now I’m a Christian. For over a year I’ve only been listening to the audio version a local church uploaded to their website every Sunday until they started uploading video earlier this year. The past few months they’ve been doing live streams because of the quarantine/lockdown, but they’ll be continuing that going forward for those like me who aren’t able to physically attend. I plan to when I’m able, though. 113. Would you call either of your parents screw ups? Absolutely not! 114. If you turned out exactly like your mom would you be pleased? Yes. 115. What do you want to do with your life? I don’t know. That’s the problem.
116. Let me guess… You have brown hair? Naturally, yes, but not currently. 117. Already know what you’re being for Halloween? I don’t dress up or do anything for Halloween anymore. The past few years I’ve just stayed home and watched scary movies. I do for the whole month of October, though. 118. Do you still go Trick or Treating? Uh, no. I’m going to be 31 years old this year. 119. Ever liked someone WAY older than you? Celebrities, but not anyone “in real life.” 120. Does it bother you when people have really loud conversations on the bus? It didn’t really bother me back when I had to take the bus sometimes in college. 121. When you have sunglasses on, do you stare at people? I don’t wear sunglasses. Also, staring is rude. I’ve had to deal with people staring at me, mostly kids, all my life. Not cool. 122. Ever had a credit card denied? No. 123. What’s the last movie you watched? Parts of James and the Giant Peach yesterday. 124. Last TV Show? The Golden Girls. 125. You see your Ex making out with one of your friends. What do you do? I don’t have any friends, but I imagine I wouldn’t like seeing that. 126. Ever been called a whore? Jokingly. 127. Are you american? Yes. 128. Ever made yourself throw up? No. 129. Have you ever kissed someone who wasn’t your boyfriend? Yes. Joseph and I did that for the entire time of whatever it was we had going on. 130. Are you Cute or Gross? I’m trash. 131. Does it bother you when people say “LOOK HOW MUCH YOU’VE GROWN!”? No one has said that to me in a very long time. I don’t recall being bothered by it, though. 132. Can you say intelligent things around the guy you like? I don’t like anyone, currently. 133. Ever had the lead in a play? Nope. Never tried out for a play either. 134. What about a solo in a concert? Ha, no. I was in choir in elementary school for a few years, but there definitely weren’t any solo parts for me. 135. What kind of a student are you? I did well. 136. Worst subject? It was always math. 137. Best subject? English. 138. Ever had a crush on a teacher? No. 139. Would it bother you if you found out that your mother was pregnant? She had a hysterectomy several years ago. 140. How late do you sleep in? Until like 230 or 3ish. 141. Do you edit your profile pictures before posting them? I use a filter. 142. Be 100% honest. Do you have any friends who are uglier than you? I was the ugly friend. 143. Do you believe in love? Well, yeah. It exists. I just feel like I’ll never experience romantic love. I’ve been in love twice, but both times were unrequited. I can’t imagine finding love in return and someone who actually wants to be with me. 144. Would you consider yourself a good student? Didn’t you ask this? 145. Does it bother you when Surveys ask “Did you like this survey?” It just seems kinda pointless cause they likely won’t see it. 146. Salty, Sweet, Sour or Spicy? Salty and sweet. I would have said spicy back in the day, but I can’t eat spicy food anymore. Haven’t been able to for the past few years. D: 147. Are you going into High School this year? Nooooo. Thank goodness. I did my time and graduated over 10 years ago. 148. What about Junior High? Omg, no. I’m old. 149. What is one thing someone could say to you right now that would make you cry? Let’s not try and make me cry. It’s almost 7AM, I should be asleep. 150. Where did you find this note? LiveJournal. 151. Last question. How many unread messages are in your phone? I don’t leave any unread text messages.
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