#my life has a lot of stress right now plus i want to stay on top of my other projects like the patreon

[read-nekojiru]

[ghostieyanyan]

If you don’t mind, which yandere twst boys do you see being most likely to exploit a mentally exhausted prefect to kidnap them?

To clarify, I think it can be argued that the prefect would be absolutely done with NRC after six life-or-death situations due to the overblots on top of being forced to adapt to education system of another world and putting up with the quality of students at NRC. You can’t tell me that a school full of villains would treat the only magicless student well. That just screams prime opportunity to manipulate the prefect into leaving NRC to go somewhere “safer” with one of the boys.

Once again, I’m just curious about your thoughts so don’t feel pressured to respond!

yes yes yes!!!

poor perfect tired to the bone from crowly and the other students. if only there was a knight and shining armor that can come and save them.

No longer an accidentally post! But I mean it did help me finish it lol

~Mental-Exhausted!Mc~

Yan!Riddle x mc

Yan!Leona x mc

Yan!Jamil x mc

Yan!Lilia x mc

Warnings: yandere, kidnapping, drug use (shrink potion), abusive behavior, chains, collar, gag, parenthood (gender-neutual), gritting teeth(?) (I know some people hate it so ill put it in here), not a lot of proof-reads,

~~~~~

Riddle

yes, riddle was the first overblot (technically) and after his overblot, he felt awful about how he behaved. he was supposed to look after Heartslaybu but he ended up becoming his mother. he hated himself for that.

So now, not only is he taking better care of his dorm, with the help of his dorm. but whenever he sees you, he tries his best to check up on you.

How are you? Do you need help with any school assignments? etc.

they all had sweet intents at first but over time, you started to look drain.. like the life was sucked right out of you. when he asked ace and deuce, they confirmed that you were just tired of all the overblots and being crowley's lap dog. if only he knew how to help you...

at first he asked, trey and cater about how he should help you. they were mature enough to know, right?

cater, being cater, teased him on "having a crush on the perfect" or how he phrased it "oooohhh you are down bad!! lol" whatever that means...

Trey said that maybe ask the perfect if they do need help. but Riddle knows the perfect, they'll say they're fine even when they're not..

riddle felt lost and swallowed his pride as he dials his mother's number.

his mother was furious with the fact that riddle was facing an issue he cant fix himself but what she said about perfect shocked him.

"well.. maybe if this perfect isn't as perfect as their title, maybe they don't belong in Night Raven College!"

with that... the call ended.

now that he wasn't being held by his mother's strings, he saw red...! no one talks about his perfect like that! but.. she has a point.. (which makes him more frustrated) if perfect is miserable here... maybe they shouldn't be attending NRC. but where would they go...?

when he thought about that, he realized he didn't really want to be away from you... you mean too much to him.

so later that day, he requested you to join him in his room, he need to talk to you. you agreed cause why would you be cautious with someone you trust, plus you were too tired to worry about how strange the request was. he gave you tea and asked if you were okay.. you said yes, just stressed with some classes and drank you tea. it tasted... off.

you feel yourself shrinking.. you were shrinking!

you looked at riddle and he was just smiling at you! he picked you up and placed you into a tea pot.

"it'll be okay, my dear. once i graduate and get us a nice home, we'll live our happy lives away from this stress and... toxic poison. But for now, you'll have to behave. i love you, my dear"

~~~~~

Leona

Whether you noticed him or not, Leona watches you run back and forth, from hallway to hallway. Kinda like a mouse running around for food but also staying hidden. Sometimes your running around helps him sleep or just ease him to a zen.

He'd normally wouldn't bat an eye because you're just a lap dog for that crow. But after time has past. He watched as you get slower, more exhausted. like you're pushing to prove something. It ercked him more than he would like. It hit too close to home for him.

When he finally was able to approach you on the matter, you looked like your soul was taken from you. Something within just snapped. He had enough of this. He made the call and suddenly, savanaclaw students came to your side and dragged you to leona's room. If you try to resist, Leona lucky told them to not hurt you too badly. But accidents happens. With their rough handling, you blacked out.

You wake up with a pretty collar around your neck and a chain attach to it? You look around and this is not your ramshackle room. You tried to sit up for a better look and get quick pulled down by the chain collar. It nearly broke your neck! But Leona would say you're being dramatic.

"Quick moving, im trying to sleep.."

You looked and saw Leona. He was laying on your chest and his legs were holding your legs down. He was like a strange weighted blanket. He wasn't in his school uniform but looks like he's in home attire?

"Where are we, leona..?"

You said, scared cause your literally in the hands of a lion that could kill you really quick..

He ears twitched and he looked up at you, bored. But he let out a smirk.

"Were home~"

It took you a minute to process what he said... home? Apparently your confused was evident on your face and leona let out a long sigh. He moved or above you, pining you down.

"Were at Sunset Savanna palace and WE are both gonna be staying here until I can trust you'll be a good obedient herbivore and stay by my side."

You were lost for words and unconsciously started to struggle under leona. Trying to push him off, kicking your legs, he got really annoyed when you accidentally pinched his tail with the bed and your foot.

His retaliation was to slam you down, knocking the wind out of your lungs. As you were gasping for air, he bit you really hard on your throat. You let out a silent scream. You thought you were going to die. This was your last moment of life.

Leona eventually let's go but quickly replacing his fangs with his hand.

"You WILL be obedient... do I make myself clear.."

That wasn't a question.. it was a demand.

~~~~~

Jamil

Jamil hardly noticed you.. PERIOD.

He's busy not only taking care of scarabia but also their housewarden. While his housewarden takes the credit.. he hated it. And the fact his housewarden is so happy go lucky to him too. Makes his blood boil!!

Jamil truly believed that no one would feel his pain, his struggles.. because everyone sees Kalim "success" before anything!

You and Jamil were in the housewarden meeting, well on the outside of the office during the meeting. Jamil had to be there because Kalim and you were there for Crowley...

You both had a quick moment until you asked him hows he been? He lends his head back against the wall and sighs. You laugh at his actions.

"I get that, hehe"

His eye twitched.

"Do you now..?"

"Heh.. I really do. I'm here for Crowley, even tho he's the Headmage. He's like a spoiled brat with responsibility... and HE knowing more about this world, and the work he does for it, more than I do. But nooo... he still gives it to me!"

Jamil stares at you as you vent about your stress and struggles in NRC. He honestly thought that your life is harder than his! How on the seven do you-?

The doors to the office opens and you and jamil both stand up. The other housewardens walked off and kalim ran to jamil, like a parent picking up their kid in kindergarten.

Jamil sighs, seeing kalim's face makes him exhausting... he quickly looks at you, not turning his head to not make it obvious. You were walking into Crowley's office as he hands you a big stack of papers. He practically saw the light in your eyes fade... he HAS to do something.. but what?

A few days past and he just watched you get more exhausted. The more he watches you the more his feelings for you grows. And the more he watched you get degraded the more he wants to set the world on fire for you..

You couldn't hold a conversation as long as you use to now! What is Crowley making you do?

His hand balled into fist. Then he get an idea.. he's always wanted to do this but never thought about it, there will be come changes to the plan with you in it but it could work!

It was in the evening and he stopped by the Ramshackle dorm. With shaking hands he knocked. He can't believe he's gonna do it.

You answer and he quick took out a cloth from his pocket and covered your mouth. Your struggles were pointless with his strength and your muffled screams wasn't going to be heard by anyone since you practically lived in the middle of nowhere. You went limp and he smile grew.

You woke up, chained, gaged, and blindfolded. You didn't know where you were you were so scared.. but you hear foot steps...

"Good morning, my little desert flower~ im sorry I had to contain you like this, I can't risk anymore seeing you. But once we leave the Isle of Sages, ill let you see."

~~~~~

Lilia

Lilia has been watching you since that first day you came here. How much chaos your presence cause, not including Grims presence, was amazing.

He'd be lying if he said he didn't feel something for you after that first day.

Whenever you're doing anything, he watches. And if hes busy, he has his bats watch you instead. They'll report any and everything about you. Including the dark circles appear under your eyes.

To say he was a little pissed... was an understandment. How dare the Crow hurt someone he cared for..

Lilia had half a mind to just get rid of Crowley with a big display of his remand.. but his kids will be scar so probably not.

He'd would think about if for a bit and told himself, why not just take you to live in Briar Valley? You could live there and he'd support you and care for you. You have a caring personal type with how much you take care of those first years.

You'll make a perfect parent...

Lilia stopped by Ramshackle dorm for a "surprised visit". You thought his strange behavior was just lilia being a strange guy? Meanwhile lilia felt like he was young again when he's with you. He felt shy and anxious. He was all fidgety and not making 100% eye contact with you.

Oh by the seven, you stir something within him and its not unwelcomed.

"Lilia? I don't mean to be rude but.. umm... why are you here..? You kinda came at a bad time.. Crowley has some paper work he wants me to fill out for him.."

Lilia fidgeting stop and if you had his super hear, you'd hear him grit his teeth for a moment.

He flips around suddenly and gets a unsettling smile.

"I came because I just remembered a old story and I wanted to tell someone before it slips my mind!"

You stared at Lilia but nodded for him to continue.

"Do you remember when I told you about the story of the Thorn Fairy? And how she put a curse on this cute little human~?"

With every word he spoke, he got closer to you.. you tried to make some distance but it quickly was put to a halt when lilia grabbed your arm.

"L-ilia.. You're hurting me.."

You tried to pull away but nothing can compete with Lilia's strength.

"Did I also tell you that with skill and focus, a powerful mage, can change the effect of such a powerful spell~?"

You're particularly trembling at this point. He got up really close to you and he shows you a small sewing needle.

"I promise, it won't be too long. Just long enough for everyone to stop looking for you~"

{I didn’t give Lilia an art piece because I drew something similar already}

[thelunarsystemwrites]

Lunar's mental health. An update.

TW: bad mental health, EDs, depression, s/h, personal stuff, suicidal thoughts, anxiety, vent, self hate, heavy topics.

Sorry I haven't been posting!!

An update on me.

...Hi, you might know me as Lunar, or, TheLunarSystemWrites! I'm just an artist on here, trying to do things I like.... right?

Well, unfortunately, real life doesn't really... care. It doesn't care if I have friends to talk to, art to make, things I like to do.

I've been exhausted, physically and mentally. I've been busy working a lot in our home. (Painting, building, packing, inside work, cooking, etc) and it's always stressful... we're starting to get a little tight on money.

I've spent majority of my time in my bed. I don't wanna face my family members, so I've hidden away. It's hard to get up every day, and try to find the will to take care of myself.

I also recently relapsed with Bulimia, a disorder that, essentially means I throw up whatever I eat. I've been purging since September 16th, 2022. But I had awhile where I only purged once a day or none, but I'm back at it with full force. So my body doesn't have any energy left. I've also now lost my periods do to it.

I don't sleep well. It's much easier to stay up all night than waste my only free time sleeping. So I have no energy from sleeping well unless I sleep a whole day away, which makes me groggy.

Self harm is also something bothering me too, I'm too tired to do it and yet I keep doing it. Wasting precious spoons on it, I literally can't be clean for a whole year this year, that dream is dead. But, I am a few days clean as I type!

Suicidal and intrusive thoughts have been.... pesky. But I can't just leave my friends, plus I have prizes to make.

But, I'm unmotivated. I can't seem to write or draw anything. All my art is looking... regressed, to me. Everything is repetitive.

I've hated myself now more than ever in my life, I'm in a pretty bad place and I hate how self aware I am.

SPEAKING of regression! I have like, regression block. My brain isn't working with me, isn't regressing unless Involuntary. So my main coping mechanism is.... out of order.

I've been angry at the world, really pissy and moody. Tired, hungry, sad, then happy but not much. Numbness is a huge factor, I'm feeling depressed.

Not to mention, there's drama everywhere I look. This creator gets bullied, that one turns out to be disgusting. People get doxxed over opinions... it's constantly anxiety that I'll be wrongly accused, ridiculed, or abandoned. It's terrifying that people will go at each other's throats. It's exhausting to deal with it and be dragged into drama with problematic people.

Every day has been the same for me for the past 3 years. I'm tired, bored, understimulation controls me.

My friends are my lifeline right now.

I feel uncomfortable in my own body all the time, unsatisfied with my art, everything is essentially falling apart in my life.

Depression, anxiety... not a good mix to wake up disoriented and anxious, then gave zero spoons throughout the day. I'm not in a good home situation right now.

So... I kinda just... haven't been posting, role-playing, answering DMs, answering asks, etc...

I'm burnt out.

I feel like I'm a walking corpse.

Useless even.

I don't feel like myself anymore, I barely have the energy to talk to friends, every little bad things sets me back. I just can't bring myself to really engage much anymore.

So... sorry. I'm sorry, if I wasted your time. Or if this isn't like what you wanted to hear. I'm just not okay anymore, April was the last good month I had this year. APRIL.

I just wanted to update you all, there's a lot of other stuff I didn't share because it's nit important. I swear I'll get to the prizes eventually, I just ain't up to it right now. Might not be for awhile, apologies in advance!!

Hope you guys can understand, I might or might not be back to doing art, who knows. But I'll definitely get things done before that if I ever stopped. It just doesn't bring me joy, I used to hope I'd make an AU people cares about, and I've barely achieved that ^^"

Hope you're all well!! Stay safe, take care!! Remember to hydrate and to try eating if you can, you're spectacular!!!

Daily clicks!! ^^

Previous pinned post.

[blair-the-juggalho]

Hello!! I absolutely love your TWDG writing. And I have been having a bad day bc my tooth broke and I'm stressed -_-

Could you possibly make a "TWDG S4 characters when a bubbly Y/N is upset/sad"? ^_^

Hey yeah ofc! And I’m so sorry I hope your day gets better lovely :(

Also I did this as platonic lmk if ya want me to redo it idm! 😭

Another sorry if there’s any spelling mistakes it’s half three am and I’m tired

Also side note, sorry I’ve been like gone a lot of stuff happened and I lost intrest in the game but it’s kinda coming back I’m just getting use to writing again so if this sucks I’m SO SORRY 😭😭😭💖💖💖

TWDG S4 characters when a bubbly Y/N is sad

Violet

She’d find you a bit strange and would tease you but in honesty she loves how bubbly you are

Whenever life gets her down all she has to do is spend some time around you and she feels better

She notices instantly when you’re upset tho and will give it a few minutes before coming up to you

“Hey. What’s up? Why are you all depressed?”

But fr tho that’s her job 😞 LMAO SORRY

But you’ll open up to her and she silently nods along

Whatever it is she gets it

“Yeah…it sucks sometimes…”

She won’t say much but she offers to go somewhere more private so you two can chill and just complain to each other

She’s not all that good at comfort but she’d really try

When your back to normal she’d have a small smile on her face

“Ya happy again now?”

She’d be a bit upset if you’d want to go right back to being around everyone else but she’d join you anyway cuz she’s just happy to see you smile again

Mitch

He doesn’t really get it I mean how can anyone be happy living like this? I mean sure it’s manageable at times but it still sucks

He’d never on his life say it but he does secretly enjoy how happy you are even if he’d tease you for it

When he sees you upset tho I’m so sorry but this man is useless here

He doesn’t notice at first but after Willy or someone points it out he picks up on it and worries a bit

However he just hopes you cheer up on your own and doesn’t say anything

But he does watch out for you in the corner of his eye

He just assumes if it’s really bad you’ll come to him

Cuz he won’t come to you unless your both alone

When you do tell him what’s up he’s still not very helpful

“Damn…that sucks..”

He does care he’s just rubbish at showing it

He will let you stay with him but be warned you’ll both be sat in silence if you’re not in a talking mood

But when you do cheer up he’s relived

again, not that he’d voice it

“Happy again huh?”

Marlon

Marlon finds you to be a breath of fresh air, he always has a gentle smile on his face when your around

He’s happy that you can bring the others up too cuz a happy group is a good group yk

Plus you keep him calm too

So when he sees his usual happy friend down in the dumps he’s very confused

What happened to you?

He watches you for a bit then walks over to you and asks if you’re ok and if ya wanna talk

Hell take you up to the office and will listen to you explain why your upset

He listens and offers some advice and comfort

He’ll let you stay with him for a bit and if you like dogs yk he’ll get rosy to give you some comfort hugs and all

He just has normal conversations with you and will say that he hopes you cheer up soon cuz what would they all do without your positive ways

When you cheer up he’ll have a big smile and if your ok with it he’ll pull you in for a hug and definitely does that back pat and rub (yk the that you do to a friend or family to either be like heyy! Or ok that’s enough now)

Louis

HELLO YOUR BASICALLY THE ONLY OTHER PERSON THEIR WHO CAN MATCH HIS ENERGY

Like he needs to see you all happy and lively because that makes him more happy and lively too!

And this mf he instantly knows when you’re down and he will come up to you and just say “aww what’s wrong (name)? You gotta turn that frown upside down!” He might even pull an over the top sad face too

Depending on what kinda person you are this either kind of works or makes it so much worse

If he does realise that he’s not helping he panics a bit like

“Oh no- they really are sad…what do I doooooo?? This is badddd…”

He’s not all that good in serious situations and will try healing you with comedy and laughter

He’ll tell jokes, tease the others at Ericsson’s

Anything to cheer you up

Heaven forbid the moment you actually do cuz this mans energy is amplified by 100

“is that a smile I see?? So mx grumpy finally cheered up? Ha well it seems I’m just the best at curing sadness.” He acts all cocky but he’s just joking

He’s very pleased to see ya back to your regular self again

Aasim

Aasim always found it curious how someone so happy could exist in a world like this

But he’d be lying if he said he didn’t like it

He can’t match your energy but he does support your cheerful ways

He won’t voice it but you do cheer him up when he’s having a bad day

he notices when you’re upset very quickly n all it’s very obvious lmao

He’ll give it a few minutes but after a while he’ll cave and awkwardly walk over to you

“So…you ok? You seem upset…”

You tell him what’s up and he listens

He either gives you advice or will empathise with you saying he gets it

He just kinda silently sits next to you cuz he doesn’t really know what to say

You both just kinda sit around for a while

he won’t really offer it out loud but he doesn’t mind giving you a hug if it will cheer you up

He just waits for you to feel better and is thankful when you do

(Sorry but damn this man I just can’t imagine he’d be much help here that sounds horrible Ik ik 😞)

Omar

This man is grateful that you’re the way you are even if he doesn’t voice it a lot

He’s also a silent observer so when he saw you where upset he just quietly watched you

I think he either doubts how good he is at comforting or he’s too preoccupied but he’ll still watch you for you

He’s kinda hoping it’s just a off day and you’ll perk up again in a while

He waits to see if anyone else will check up on you or if you’ll come to him

But if enough time has passed and both of those didn’t happen he’ll slowly make his way over to you

He doesn’t say much but he listens to you

The few times he does speak it’s either reassurance or advice

He will stay with you for as long as he can and if he had to start cooking again he’d let you stand next to him while he does so

When you cheer up again he wont say much but he has a smile on his face

Ruby

Ruby fully appreciates your bubbly ways and she will usually match your energy when she can

She really thinks you totally brighten up Ericssons!

But today you were acting totally different and she could just sense it

Like there was a shift in the air she just picked up on before she even saw you

Since she gives me like mother friend vibes she totally instantly goes over to ya

Are you ok hun? Ya seem down? What’s happened? Do ya need some space?

She’s there and she will listen to ya 100%

She does whatever she can to be supportive and she might tell a few rubbish puns to make you smile again

She’ll get all protective of ya too like if anyone tries to annoy ya (which I doubt anyone would but yk just incase) she will get so mad at them she’s shout at them and scold them so much

She’ll either stay by you till you cheer up or will give you the space if you need it but the moment she sees that smile she loves so much and that cheery personality she adores she’s matching that happy face

Brody

This girl loves how bubbly you are it’s such a nice change of pace from the usually rubbish day to day apocalypse life

You don’t know how much you can cheer her up and make her feel more relaxed

So she was super quick to notice that you where sad

Huh that’s (name), why arn’t they all happy?? Where’s that lovely smile gone??

I don’t think she’d straight away ask if you where ok cuz maybe you needed some space? I mean it’s normal to get upset now a days but this isn’t like you

She’d ask the others like Marlon if they noticed that you’ve done a total 180

She’d still stay put but keeps a close eye on you and after a few minutes of watching you mope around she’d walk up to you and ask if you where ok

After you tell her what’s got ya so bummed out she’d do anything to get that smile back

She’d listen to you, give you advice if you wanted it, she’d give you a hug literally anything!

She’d also try to distract you by planning some made up road trip (a beach trip if I remember correctly??)

She needs to see her friend go back to their bubbly self 😞

Once you do cheer up she just sighs in relief man she’s happy you’re back to normal lmao

[sepublic]

Thinking back to criticisms of Luz going through the same arc of opening up and letting people in throughout S2B onwards (a point following Yesterday's Lie, where Luz's guilt increased tenfold after seeing Camila's reaction), and I think it's important to remember that this is the frustrating reality behind living when you have self-loathing, suicidal ideation, etc., AKA things Luz absolutely had. The healing process IS unpleasant, that's the point. Especially in later cases when the Day of Unity is impending, or the need to get back to the Demon Realm; Sometimes the situation is inherently stressful, it feels helpless and it’s not just a matter of mental health and handling. And that just makes it easier to self-sabotage.

To apply my own quote from another fandom to this situation: Luz is grappling with continuing to apply this lesson of self-worth because that's the exhausting truth; You will relapse and you will have to constantly remind yourself and relearn that same lesson over and over again. That's life, that's the banal truth behind living, but there's also a deep wonder behind it too.

Plus there’s other ideas this contributes towards; Like how you need to live with mistakes and how that plays into Camila’s arc with her daughter; Luz having her You are Not Immune to Propaganda moment, then forgiving herself to avoid the fallacy in Leftist circles that it’s better to have done nothing wrong than to do something right.

In particular, we see how Luz’s relapse can affect Amity, and how it gradually wears down on her, how it's genuinely stressful on her end as well; Obviously, Amity is giving Luz extra grace because Luz did the same for her first, despite nothing really prompting on her own end besides unyielding compassion. So it would hypocritical to not extend that same patience in return, and Amity does!!! But it ties back into why Raine and Eda broke up, why Raine isn't blamed for it, why Eda has to take responsibility and not just wallow in self-pity about how she's driven people away because Eda has others she cares about, and needs to look after as well, especially when they're kids dependent on her!!!

So Luz’s own relationship with Amity is at stake here if she doesn’t internalize her lesson, and sure that may seem insignificant compared to saving the isles; But it’s not just about saving the isles, but also Luz letting herself want things by continuing to stay afterwards, rather than live a self-imposed exile out of the mistaken belief that she’s inherently harmful to the demon realm for being an outsider. That can be a xenophobic take! And in the end, that relationship with Amity (who very much benefitted from Luz the Outsider) is one of the things Luz looks forward to even in her depression, and even if she planned to cut ties she wouldn’t want Amity to leave it on a bad note either; In fact Luz shouldn’t cut ties, period.

And I find it a bold take; That you need to open up not just because it's good for you, but because if you really care about your loved ones, you will see it hurts them too. That you're not just hurting yourself, this is not your ideal, noble self-sacrifice. You are still deciding things for other people in a way by hurting them, that you're not just caring about yourself but the loved ones you claim are better off from this anyhow.

You are putting people under a lot of stress because they can't reach out, and to save themselves because they can't save you without your own input, sometimes they just gotta cut ties. They feel like you're not being honest with them, and you can't blame them for making it about themselves because they've spent all this time up until now trying to make it about you and why you deserve to live. And since your own wellbeing as motive isn't good enough, at least consider theirs???

If you think about it, this could even apply to Luz’s own relationship with the Demon Realm; By insisting it doesn’t need her, that she’s more a harmful force than anything, she’s just harming it in the long run by not helping stop Belos. The isles needs Luz too, it’s not just the other way around! And then you have to remember the isles is an actual person, the Titan; So it’s another relationship of hers to maintain. The Titan is like a father figure, like Manny, so it all ties back together in Luz continuing to live and love to honor her dead father.

It's easy and even comforting to portray this type of self-loathing and self-destruction as only happening in a vacuum; But it doesn't. Despair can be comforting, and it's gonna keep hitting you over and over, unless you keep fighting it over and over. By god is it tedious, but over time it might fade away entirely. But even then you might have to stay on alert regardless. They really weren't kidding when they said To Live is To Suffer. But it's also To Thrive, and you need to work for that too.

Plus, Luz not being just done after hearing it the first time connects to how the Boiling Isles wasn't magically fixed following Belos' death and the Collector releasing everyone; They still had other people to worry about, like the other coven heads, and so much work in rebuilding the isles. We check back four years later and only then do they finally figure out how to undo coven bindings. The work continues, life continues, there is no definitive ending but you just gotta keep going. This was Dana's actual intent behind her displeasure with "Happily ever after" as a phrase, rather than hating happy endings inherently.

And I think the fact that there's still so much more to do works with the meta fact that there were still so many other stories and conflicts left untold, unresolved; Things like the Archivists, the Bat Queen's past, coven heads like Hettie Cutburn or Vitimir, etc. But in a way, the epilogue, the four year gap, and life continuing after the Quincenera because of course it will, because people and things will live on no matter how much destruction there is, is good space to explore that.

And it's a gift to fans who love stories and have the opportunity to make more themselves, because Dana herself explained in an interview how she loved to make connections in shows she had growing up, so it pleased her to inspire the same in fans from this generation. At the very least, if the show was given a spin-off or continuation, something like that, there'd definitely be more stories, and more work, to do with The Owl House. Again, those unlived stories are both the frustration, but also the wonder, behind keeping going.

[the-violet-galaxy]

I don’t want Old Moon to come back to life -- and I REALLY hope this arc doesn’t end with him being alive again, in any capacity.

In my opinion, bringing Old Moon back to life would be a terrible decision for everything, on all narrative fronts.

It’s true a lot of characters come back to life in TSAMS. When Lunar died, him getting resurrected was part of the story from the beginning (Monty located part of his nanomachine body and started work right away). Solar coming back to life has been a key point of this arc. Etc

But Old Moon's death was permanent. The story was that it couldn’t be undone.

So much of the story, angst, and arcs (New Moon’s entire life; Sun in so much pain from losing his brother) centered around Old Moon being gone for good.

What made Old Moon’s death so impactful WAS that it was permanent. He made the choice to die and Sun would never see him again. He would never meet Earth or bond with Lunar or Solar. The whole painful denial of closure.

But -- to be able to just… BRING HIM BACK TO LIFE, it cheapens everything. It retroactively makes everything, all the angst and character development involving the memory of Old Moon, lose what made it so good. (And now knowing it was possible from the very beginning??? Doubly so. So many sad moments are tainted knowing that Monty was sitting off to the side, awkwardly whistling and twiddling his thumbs.)

Because the story was written this way, bringing Old Moon back is one of those things that shouldn’t be touched. Some characters need to die and stay dead.

(I was even hesitant when Monty first brought up that Moon could talk to his old self. I was worried this meant Old Moon was still “technically alive”, which would lead to the cheapening of things. But, when they said Old Moon was just an “instinctual copy”/comatose at all times, I was a little reassured; that was manageable. The show even stressed that Old Moon wasn’t actually alive; Monty said it plainly that he couldn’t take over, he was just an instinctual copy. New Moon himself said “he knows he’s dead. He knows he's isn't going to come back.”

So…

Why are we playing with the idea of him coming back now!? After all that!?

And bringing him back wouldn’t FIX anything. Not for Sun or the family --

Recently, Sun disowned New Moon, and started talking about how toxic Old Moon really was towards him.

And we saw how Old Moon acted while comatose. Even in DEATH, Old Moon didn’t really want to change who he was or how he behaved. He even says he’s afraid of talking to Sun because of what he might say. If he won’t change after experiencing death, he is probably never going to. If he comes back, he’ll most likely go right back to being the exact same asshole.

And we know that Sun has developed enough to finally not take it. He would NOT let Old Moon treat him like that anymore. He is willing to cut a toxic family member out of his life.

So, what -- would the story just bring Old Moon back, have him be the same asshole that Sun has moved beyond, and then have Sun put his foot down and do a second disownment? I just don’t see the point in that.

Even if something really dumb happens, like Old Moon is given a SECOND BODY so that there are both Moons at the same time… are they just gonna have Old Moon be exiled from the family and become a drifter side character out in the world, who only shows up to cameo once in a while? That would not be satisfying --  and I doubt Old Moon would be happy being away from the family, seeing how the show hammers in how his family is the only thing he cares about.

(And you can’t have him hanging around as a permanent member of the cast alongside New Moon – you’d have to juggle two Moon characters, which just seems like a HUGE headache for everyone and could get confusing for the viewers trying to keep who is who straight. I’m sure that acting for two Moons in every scene would also be a pain in the ass for the voice actors. Plus, New Moon is just THE MOON of The Sun and Moon Show now; are they going to alternate between which Moon is doing the gaming videos??? That’d be a mess.)

(The only other option is to fuse both Moons into Moon-V.3. which is. Please no. We’ve already had a Moon reset, and this would essentially be the same thing, creating a whole new person. It’s redundant, we’ve done that before. Please do something else.)

New Moon is a real piece of work right now and I don't like this arc, but this is his story to conclude. Not Old Moon's. New Moon has to deal with the repercussions of what he's done to the family (and it's looking like Dark Sun has been controlling him or nudging his personality, so he might not be as guilty as we initially thought; we'll have to see the extent of how much control Dark Sun had). New Moon has to face the consequences of his actions himself. In a way, Old Moon ran away from his consequences when he let himself die, he never had to face up to what he did or atone with his own hands; New Moon needs to stay and face what he's done in this story, he needs to face what happened to the family. Even if it's revealed it's not entirely his fault, he needs to stay. (If he does stay, he will actually be better than Old Moon, who ran away.)

If Old Moon HAS to come back, there’s just one way I can think of that I’d want it to go, but this is already long enough, so I’ll save it for later. I just wanted to throw my opinion out here.

TLDR: I don’t want Old Moon to come back to life AT ALL because it will cheapen the story and his death, and if he comes back to life there’s no satisfying place for him.

[themultifandomgal]

Hello again, with another request about Blake Gallo x female reader, it can be somewhat based on the first chapter where he appears, when he scales those balconies, about the reader seeing the rescue on the news, and she decides to break up with him because he takes too many risks in his job. The thing is, she wanted to tell him that she's pregnant but decides not to say anything. After three years, they meet again, and he sees her with a child, his son, they talk about the issue. With some angst, but with a fluffy ending. Feel free to change anything as you wish.

By the way, "Happy (belated) New Year," I hope you've started this year well. Gracias. <3 <3 <3

Blake Gallo- Our Son Pt1

3 years ago I left my boyfriend Blake Gallo. Watching him leave for work everyday and not knowing if I was going to see him again stressed me out so much, to the point I was making myself ill. The final straw for me was when I watch Blake scale a balcony on the TV. I couldn’t do it anymore, especially since I found out I was pregnant. I was so scared that stress would cause a miscarriage. Call me selfish, but I tried to talk to Blake about him taking to many risks, being the first one to jump at the opportunity to risk his own life. I was scared. Now 2 years later I am a single mother to a gorgeous little boy and I’m back in Chicago knowing that Blake should have the opportunity to meet his son. With my son on my hip I walk into the firehouse

"YN? Is that you?” I turn and see Matt Casey walking towards me

“Hi Matt” I give him a little smile. Matts gaze down to my little boy

“Who’s this?”

“This is Jackson” I smile looking at my son

“And the dad?”

“That’s why I’m here. Is Blake around?”

"Come with me" I follow Matt further into the firehouse

"Gallo. You've got a visitor" that’s when Blake looks up at me from the table

“YN?”

"Hi" is all YN can say.

To have a bit of privacy Matt let’s Blake and I chat in his office

“What are you doing here?”

“This is the reason I’m here” I nod towards Jackson who’s now tucked his head into my neck

"Is he...."

"Yours? Yeah. I wanted you to have the choice to be part of his life”

“He’s what a year old. Why didn’t you find me sooner?”

“I was scared, selfish, but I was never planning on hiding him from you”

“When did you find out you were pregnant?” Blake asks leaning on Matts desk

“The day we broke up”

“You mean the day you left”

“Yeah” I breathe out feeling ashamed of myself “I was going to tell you that night. That’s why I wanted you to stop being to reckless”

“So you walked out on me?” Blake rubs is hands over his face, obviously feeling a little stressed and confused. He then looks at Jackson

"What's his name?"

"Jackson" again there's a small pause “look I know this is a lot to take in so here” I take a notes out of my back pocket with my new number on it "I'm staying in Chicago for the week. So if you want to be in his life then call me or text” I hand over my new number and leave the office.

Walking back to the others Blake flops down at the lunch table with a sigh

“So the kid?" Gabby asks

"Mine. She's giving me a choice to be part of his life. I just don't know how we're going to make this work. She left me, kept my son from me. How do I even be a dad?"

“That part will come naturally if you want it” Matt tells Blake

“Plus if think about it, it’s like the universes way of telling you to give it another go” Gabby shrugs

"If your both serious about this you'll figure something out" Sylvie says

Over the day, Blake has YN and Jackson on his mind. Thinking about what to do, what was the right thing to do? In the end he settles on messaging his ex partner.

[wuxiaphoenix]

Thoughts of an Isegye’d Historian: A Cunning Plan

Jason Finn

Step one, success! We’re still alive!

Step two....

Okay, step two is to figure out what step two is. I can think of a bunch of things we need to do from here.

Start with, we need to stay alive. For that Mary and I need a safe place to stay, food, water, spending cash, and enough helpful friends, allies, and general area knowledge to keep us from blundering into known hazards. You know; dust storms, pirates, monsters, lawsuits....

Sticking with the Callers and Lee Cheong seems like the best course of action for now. As long as we help with anything we can, they’re willing to put us up and get us started on local language and customs. Plus sticking with them also means sticking with Chae and her library, and that just seems like a really good idea. No, not just because we both want new stuff to read.

(Well, yes, I do, but not the point.)

But Chae’s a foreign cultivator, known for grabbing odd bits of lore from everywhere. If we start spreading wild ideas like democracy and rights to life, liberty, and property, we could end up in very hot water, very quickly. But if a Heavenly cultivator mentions thoughts on philosophy based on little-known passages of Confucian texts....

I’ll have to think about that one. Try out some arguments on Chae, see what she thinks. I do not know how dangerous this might be. Chae can tell us if we need to start small and cautious, or if we’ll need to spend years getting people to know us before we even do that much.

Speaking of starting. If I don’t want us to starve, the best way to do that is make it so no one starves. Tricky.

Okay, think. There’s more than one way to attack this. More and alternate crops are the obvious way. I should mention things like baby freshwater crabs in rice paddies, ducks herded in to glean them after harvest-

Oh. Hive boxes. More accessible honey, less stress on the bees; honey is food and medicine. I don’t remember how large the bee gap between frames has to be, but it’s about as thick as one bee and you can find it by carefully moving the frames. Too close together, they’ll make one mass of comb. Too far apart, they’ll build extra cells in the space. People will have to experiment.

Back to crops. Better fertilizers - do they have guano sources? Better nutrition from the food itself; they’ve got corn, do they know they have to lime it to get more nutrients? Ways to kill pests and weeds - oh my Lord, locust swarms. I know those hit in the Little Ice Age. Is there any way cultivators can stop them dead?

And that leads into, one way to stretch available food is to make sure you lose as little of the harvest as possible. Cultivators manipulate heat and cold. Can we make cold boxes to keep food fresh? Can we, oh, heat-treat the rice meant just for eating, so it doesn’t get moths? How do we handle mold? Is there anything we can do for farmers that’ll make bringing in crops easier and faster?

If I recall right, one of the main labor and time bottlenecks was getting grain out of the field just when it was ripe. Make that faster, and the effects will ripple out a lot. I need a harvester.

...I have no idea how to make a harvester. Outside of, pulling it moves the blade automatically-?

Maybe I don’t need to know. If I can describe what it does, maybe someone else can figure out how to build it.

...While we’re all trying to figure out how far the Grendel curse spread, and how much cure we can come up with to stop it. And we need to look for other survivors of JL93. And see if - knock on wood - maybe there’s some way home....

Well. One step at a time.

[foreveralwaysanauthor]

I know you said in your comments on my last post that I didn't need to make you anything as congratulations, but girl, I've been concocting this thing in my head for the better part of a month and finally had the time to work it all together the last day or so. You're getting this thing one way or another! It's not perfect, but I've been watching edits for all sorts of fandoms with this song on TikTok for a while now, and it was too great of an opportunity to miss. Plus, this trend came about with perfect timing, so it works for both a mental plot eraser and a graduation gift all in one!

Now, although I'm sure you can piece it together yourself as it comes from your idea of what I've been calling The Playhouse Playoffs, I'm going to kind of explain how I thought things would go down/why I used the clips I did. However, first, please take a minute and fourish seconds to watch this thing that's been festering in my head for the last... I don't even know how long, honestly. Also, Tumblr screwed up the timing a bit in certain parts if you're watching it on a computer, but if you're watching it on your phone, it should be fine.

My take on the little story within the clips:

Part 1 - The camp is the gun.

If they're not riding together to camp, Riven and Vivien have a yearly race to the grounds to not only see who can get there first, but also who can be the one to claim Lakeside. Lakeside isn't a first come, first serve type of deal as their group (friends and family) always stays there, and Grandpa George and Nonna Dawn know this, but the person who claims it first gets to pick out group activities outside of planned events. Riven has beaten her almost every year, even when they were just riding down from Hill House on their bikes. In this case, Riven gets there first and is quick to see Nonna to claim Lakeside, but Vivien is more concerned with getting there with her friends for once and doesn't really care until he begins teasing her about it. Given her already rough start to the summer (as you saw in my preview of the first chapter), she finds it hard to take his light teasing as light.

Part 2 - The playhouse is the gun.

As the only two senior staff members who actually enjoy anything related to theatre (sadly, Carrie doesn't count as it's only her second year working there), Riven and Vivien are tasked with figuring out what show to put on. When neither can come to a clear choice in their meeting, Nonna suggests they do both - a battle of sorts to see who could take seniority for the next year based on ticket sales. Vivien, in a desperate attempt to prove herself capable so that her grandparents know the camp is in good hands when they eventually hand it off to her, agrees despite dreading how hard she knows she's just made her summer when she wanted nothing more than to enjoy her time with her friends.

Part 3 - Carrie is the gun.

As you've established (and I love), Riven steals Carrie away before Vivien has the chance to. Frankly pissed off by her lack of opportunity, she takes out her frustration on Riven, who reminds her that she had the chance to snatch Carrie up early, but was too caught up with everything else to even try. Despite her reluctance to admit it, she knows he's right and backs down, but the stress of everything is mounting, and she refuses to return to Lakeside that night as she knows Riven will have his show's crew over for a script-reading party, resigning to watching from afar.

Part 4 - The shows are the guns.

In my opinion, a lot will have happened between the initial reading party and the actual shows - apart from the obvious passage of time, I mean. While Riven’s been gliding through things without much stress due to having Carrie and a few stragglers from Vivien’s group on his side, Vivien’s been struggling with making things as perfect as possible. On top of this, things have been rocky in her personal life. She-who-must-not-be-named has been poking her nose where it doesn’t belong, rumors have been spread like wildfire, and the people she cares about have been keeping so many secrets that she feels like she’s drowning. Now, two days before the weekend their shows are set to perform, she finds all of the handmade costumes she and her group have worked so hard on sitting torn to shreds in a mud puddle after a particularly rough storm. The only person other than herself who has access to the locked area of the playhouse where they're keeping the costumes is Riven, making her believe that he must have had something to do with it despite his claims that he had no idea. Things get fiery between them as Vivien unleashes all of her previously withheld thoughts and emotions, and Riven argues that if she thinks he had anything to do with her show crashing and burning like the literal fire in the script, she must not know him at all. Riven walks away to pour his feelings into making his show great while Vivien picks up the pieces of the mess she's created and tries to figure out a way to get things back on track.

Part 5 - The actual performances are the guns, and it's not just the two of them reaching this time. The casts are reaching too.

After everything blows up between their directors and neither returns to the cabin that night, the two casts join forces the next morning to fix things without their directors' knowledge. They find ways to repair the damages done while Butchy and Miles try to talk Vivien out of her lockdown at the Hill House, and Carrie works on prying Riven out of his basement. Butchy convinces Vivien to at least try talking to Riven after his show's final rehearsal and, despite herself, she allows them to drag her back to the camp and waits out back for the cast to leave before slipping inside to talk with him. They've never really had a falling out before, and it takes a while to work through things with Vivien on the brink of an emotional breakdown and Riven sitting there, stonefaced, but they talk nonetheless and decide to work everything out as much as possible before the weekend so that they can comfortably enjoy each other's shows and go back to something resembling the "normal" they're used to.

I'll leave it at that for now, but just know that I have a lot of ideas for that storyline and really needed to get them all written down so they wouldn't bounce around in my head for the foreseeable future. I hope you enjoyed my little video and the thoughts behind each part, but honestly, El, I love this idea for Camp Wanamaker and am so excited to finally be able to post something for it!

[neptoons1998]

Let me take care of you

Summary: Shuri is feeling the whole world on her shoulders. Good thing she has a good girlfriend to help her out.

A/N: I wanted to write some fluff..sue me.

Tag Gang: @s0lam33y @mal-urameshi @xchoxix @somethingcleaverandwhitty @ashleighshaw

Shuri is feeling stressed out because she has a lot of work to do. Between her soon-to-be marriage with the love of her life, Riri, and keeping up her appearance with the council. The young queen was running herself ragged. 

“You know you could ask for some help,” Okoye told once when the pair were going over new updates of the midnights. Shuri shook her head, the queen was more than capable of doing this. It was easy, Shuri thought as she cleaned up some of the mess she made before going to another meeting and making an appearance to the miners who worked so hard collecting the precious metal.  Plus it’s not like Riri could help, the American was just now taking classes about the history and cultures of Wakanda. 

Shuri couldn’t burden her love with her stress levels right now. If I can’t this stress on a daily what happens if I have to deal with something worse than this Shuri thought, it’ll be all worth it once I get married she read through potential new improvements for Wakanda. Shuri sighed for what must be the third time, she knew she just needed to break down some of her work into smaller tasks, even if that sounded like an undoable. 

Riri was a genius, she knew that. Other people knew that so it wasn’t really rocket science to see how stressed out Shuri have been the past couple of weeks. Riri knows how prideful her soon-to-be wife is. It was something Riri loved and hated when Shuri didn’t take care of herself. Once the lessons that Riri had to take were done for the day. The short woman made her way to the lab. There was Shuri in her serious face focusing, the queen was shocked to see Riri who simply took her hand and left the lab. 

“What are you doing?” Shuri asked now that they left the lab, “And where are we going?”

 Riri still holding her hand. Riri gave her a soft smile at her, “You  need some TLC.”

“TLC?” Shuri repeated as they made it to their chambers. Riri let go of her hand for Shuri’s. Shuri quickly followed her love in the adjoined bathroom. Riri was testing the running water before placing soap making some bubbles. 

“Great,” Riri said as she stood up, “Take your clothes off and get in.”

Shuri smirked at her, “At least wait until after the wedding, my love.”

“Like you believe in the concept of waiting for marriage,” Riri rolled her eyes, “Haha you’re so funny, kitten. I’m serious.”

Once Shuri was in the water it was like all her worries were wasted away. Shuri couldn’t hold the relaxing sigh. Lavender of the bubbles was inhaled through Shuri’s nose. I could stay here for the next ten minutes then I’ll work on a new update firewall for GRIOT. After that I-

“I know you have been working extra hard because the wedding and the council are asking more than should out of you,” Riri said waking up Shuri to listen to her love as Riri ran the rag against Shuri’s skin, “But you have to remember to be gentle with yourself, Shuri. You have been through more than anyone should’ve to go through.”

“Yes I understand that,” Shuri commented as she turned to look at Riri, “But it’s a part of the job. My grandparents could handle it. My parents could handle it, even T’Challa handled it with ease. It should be easy for me as well.”

Riri looked at her as she placed her hand on Shuri’s hand, “It will be once you let us help you.”

Shuri bit her lip, “I-I don’t think I know how to…”

Riri smiled at the comment as their nose touched, “Don’t worry kitten. Just let me take care of you.”

[jimin-jungshook-over-literalbae]

Blinding Light Chapter Three

Hey guys! Back again with Chapter Three. Guess I’m just plowing through the writing of these. I haven’t felt this inspired in a while. It’s odd. I’m pretty excited to be writing this so we’ll see how everything goes. Hopefully, I can stay somewhat consistent. I’ve gotten some wonderful encouragement while writing this au.

Hybrids: Munchkin Cat Y/N (Omega), Fox Jin (Omega), Panther Yoongi (Alpha), Golden Retriever J-Hope (Beta), Wolf RM (Alpha), Calico Cat Jimin (Omega), Tiger V (Beta), Bunny Jungkook (Beta)

Word Count: 4, 274

Description: Y/N has spent the past seven years trapped in a hole in the floor. Forced in horrible situations she wished nothing more than to escape. When escape presents itself in the form of a group of seven hybrids, surely she must have finally snapped. Now, she has to figure out how a normal life works after being trapped in perpetual hell with her suddenly appearing mates.

Masterlist

Previous Chapter, Next Chapter

The next morning, I’m able to sneak out of the bed much easier than the morning before. I had promised Taehyung that I would meet him in his art studio to get the coffee mug for Yoongi. I try to sneak as quietly as I can, still wanting it to be a surprise. I open the door to the studio, only to be surprised to see a room lined with bookcases. All kinds of books sit on them, all shapes, sizes, and colors. Namjoon lounges on a couch, a book open in his hands. I blush as he looks up at me.

“Sorry, I thought this was Tae’s art studio,” I admit bashfully. He sets his book down, marking his page.

“It’s no problem. It’s two more doors down,” Namjoon offers me a smile, his dimples on display.

“I-Is it okay if I take a look around?” I chew on my bottom lip. I had never been in a library before. None of my owners were ever big readers so I hadn’t spent a lot of time around books. I can feel his eyes on me as I wander the room, looking at different books.

“You can borrow any books you want, whenever,” This comes from right behind me and then his chest is against my back as he pulls a book from the shelf. I can’t help but blush,” Try this one. You might like the story.”

“Can I ask you a question?” I glance over at him, the book clasped to my chest,” Are you okay with me being here? I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“What would make you ask that?” He pauses, giving me a confused look.

“I just… it seems like you might not like me very much and we haven’t really spent any time around each other,” I admit. I can’t help but think about him being at the back of the group in my room last night.

“I don’t dislike you,” He folds his hands and rests his chin on them,” I just wanted to give you time. This must all be very overwhelming for you and I didn’t want to add to your stress. Plus, I figured you might need a break from seeing me, seeing as I’m the one that keeps interrogating me.”

I think his words over for a minute. In the two time I had spent time with Namjoon, they had both been high stress situations. I’m sure that didn’t give him the best impression. Plus, he’s heard the more intimate details of my times. I’ve been fairly good at blocking that from my mind. I’m just trying to be normal. I’ll have to deal with those memories and emotions at some point, but I have time.

“I don’t dislike you either,” I say finally, giving him a bright smile,” I hope we can spend some time together in the future. To become more comfortable with each other.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” Namjoon gives me a dimpled smile and returns to his book. I go two more doors down to meet Taehyung. He yawns, stretching and scratching his head. He seems half asleep. I feel kind of bad for making him wake up so early so I could get the cup before breakfast. Tae brightens up upon seeing me.

“It’s ready. I double checked to make sure it was solid and it should be good,” He holds the cup out to me and I cradle it gently in my hands. I set it down gently on the table and jump into his arms, hugging him tightly.

“Thank you!” He seems stunned for a moment but then quickly hugs me back. I pull back and pick the cup back up,” I have to get back before Yoongi wakes up.”

I run back to my room, sitting the cup on the night stand and hoping onto the bed. I land partially on Yoongi, who grunts. He blinks for a few moments before focusing on me. My face hovers over his as I smile down at him.

“I have a present for you!” I announce, hoping out of his reach before he can wrap his arms around me and try to go back to sleep. I pick up the cup and put it behind my back,” Close your eyes and hold out your hands.”

He does as I say, his eyes closing quickly. It warms my heart that he listened so quickly. I place it in his hands gently, trying to contain my excitement. I really hope he likes it. This is the first gift I’ve ever given someone, let alone one that I’ve made.

“Open,” I say softly. His eyes open and immediately fix on the coffee cup,” Tae showed me how to make pottery yesterday. I noticed you drink a lot of coffee and I thought you might li-“

He pulls me toward him, interrupting me words as his lips press to mine. A whine is trapped in my throat as his lips consume mine. His hands are at my waist as mine rest on his cheeks. It feels like home, comfort, sunlight, a warm that builds in the soul. It’s like I can feel our souls being knit together. The idea of being away from him, of never being able to see him again, would tear me apart. Is this what being mates means? He finally pulls away, both of us breathless. His lips are a little red and I can’t help but think of how they got that way.

“Thank you,” His smile is gummy and sweet. His hands now rest on my hips,” I love it. I hope I wasn’t too forward or anything.”

“It’s fine, really,” I give him a quick peck on the lips before dancing out of his reach,” Jin is gonna have breakfast ready soon.”

“We can still cuddle before breakfast,” He whines.

“Nuh-uh. No way. We’ll never make it downstairs,” I open the door again, the delicious smell of breakfast wafting upstairs,” I’m gonna go see if I can help him with anything. If you’re not downstairs before breakfast is on the table, I’m sending the chaos twins.”

I watch him rolls his eyes before I close the door and head downstairs and to the kitchen. He’s fully focused on his cooking, seemingly unaware of my presence. He’s flipping pancakes and humming to himself. It’s strange to think that the professional doctor I saw that first night is this same man. I clear my throat and he jumps a little, nearly dropping a pancake on the floor.

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to startle you,” I rush forward, feeling immediately guilty.

“I just startle easily,” He laughs jovially, throwing the pancake back in the pan,” Breakfast won’t be done for a few more minutes.”

“I know, I just had a question for you,” I chew my bottom lip nervously. I’ve really got to stop doing that.

“Ask away, darling,” He keeps cooking but he glances up at me from time to time.

“My… previous owner had me on a heat suppressant. I took it daily. I don’t know if there are any bad effects to being off of it this long, if I should stay on it or what we should do,” I trail off, not sure where I’m going with this, now.

“Well, it’s not great for a Hybrid to be on suppressants. They can have some pretty nasty side effects while you’re on them. That being said, they aren’t a medicine that makes you sick, going cold turkey. It lingers in your system for about 2-3 weeks, depending on the dosage. We’ll just have to keep track of your cycle while you’re coming off of it,” I help him set the various plates on the table,” We have a den on the first floor we use for our heats. I’ll have Namjoon get it ready in case you go into your heat early. It’ll probably be a really short one, at first. Your next one would be normal, though.”

“Okay. I just wanted to make sure. Would you guys… prefer if I stay on them? I don’t want to make anyone uncomfortable or make them feel obligated to help me with my heats. I’ve gone through them alone before so it’s not a big deal,” I’m glad no one has come in yet, or I would feel way more embarrassed.

“That one is up to you. We would obviously never make you have help. That being said, don’t ever feel like you can’t ask any of us for help. Any one of us would be glad to help and it would never be trouble,” Jin shoots me a smile and wink before yelling at everyone to come to breakfast. We all eat before it’s time for everyone to split off for the day. Namjoon and Jin head to work, Namjoon dragging Jimin and Taehyung with him. Hoseok and Yoongi are off next, leaving me and Jungkook.

“Looks like you’re stuck with me for the day,” He grins broadly, his bunny teeth on full display,” I actually wanted to talk to you about something.”

“What is it?” My eyebrows furrow.

“Would you like me to teach you some self defense?” His question catches me off guard,” With us not catching your owner and with what happened in the van, I feel like you knowing self defense might come in handy.”

“That would actually be really great,” I’m surprised that the idea makes me happy.

“I know it’s hard, as an Omega, to picture yourself hurting someone else. Jimin was the same way,” Jungkook gets up from his seat to help me stack the dishes and put them in the sink,” But I know everyone would be more comfortable leaving you by yourself if you had some kind of defense.”

After we finish the dishes, we head upstairs to get changed into more work out style clothes. Another pair of bicycle shorts and a t-shirt that was left on my bed and smells like Yoongi. There’s a new pair of tennis shoes sitting in the closet too, so I throw those on. Jungkook waits for me the in the hallway, leading me into a room that turns out to be his gym. He does some quick rearranging, laying some mats on the floor.

“Stand here,” he motions his hands to the spot in front of him,” So, your advantage is that you’re almost always gonna be smaller, so you’re faster and can get out of tight spots easier. However, if you get hit, it’s gonna hurt. Almost everything I’m going to show you is going to be a move that can be used to help you escape.”

He takes me through a lot of different moves, practicing each one until I feel comfortable with it. He shows me how to position my hands and feet, how to move my body and avoid injury. We break after a couple of hours to eat some sandwiches and catch our breath. There’s something enjoyable about just moving your body. Not having to think and just moving.

“Now, if you ever have to punch someone, it comes from your hips. You move your whole body with it, or it doesn’t have the impact you want. Show me your fist,” I hold it up for him. His hands cover mine as he readjusts them,” You want to hold it like this to avoid breaking anything. If you send a punch from your elbow, it’s gonna hurt like hell. Watch me.”

He demonstrates a punch and I try to copy his movements. He stands behind me and guides my movement. His hands are warm, even on my fevered skin. We run through a few more stances and movements before we finally call it a day.

“You did great! I was worried you wouldn’t want to learn them but I’m glad you were okay with it,” Jungkook chugs water from a bottle he got from the mini fridge. He tosses one to me, which I catch,” I’d still prefer if you were around one of the other guys if shit goes down, but at least I know you can hold your own.”

“I’m sure real situations will be much different and I doubt I’ll perform as well as a rehearsed situation,” I sit cross legged on one of the mats. Yoongi’s shirt is so long on me that it goes to my knees.

“That’s what I’m here for. I can practice with you whenever you want,” He still seems quite energetic despite our hours of work. He pauses for a second before his eyes widen,” Oh! I almost forgot. I have something for you. Lets get cleaned up and then I’ll meet you in the living room.”

After a quick shower and a change of clothes, I make my way to the living room. Jungkook is on the phone when I head downstairs. I wait patiently on the couch while he finishes up. Once he’s done, he collapses on the couch next to me. His hair is wet and he now wears jeans and a t-shirt. After a moment, he straightens up again.

“Okay, so I have to go and meet Namjoon to get some work done. We wanted you to have this,” He holds out a phone,” I’ve programmed everyone’s numbers in. I can show you how to use it real quick.”

He walks me through setting up my new phone, including the Face ID and passcode. He also shows me texting and informs me that he’s added me to a group chat with the guys. Apparently, they use that as a main method of communication with each other. I nod along, unsure of what I would even say.

“If you need anything, give one of us a call. We’ll probably pick up some kind of take out for dinner since we all had to go out today,” Jungkook catches me off guard by pressing a quick kiss to my forehead,” I’ll see you when I get back.”

And then I’m alone. For the first time in three days, I’m completely alone. Thoughts and emotions rush through me all at once. Too many to process, or even comprehend. I suddenly feel more exhausted than I did before, curling up on the couch with my face pressed into a pillow. There’s a blanket on the back of the couch that I pull around me. It smells like Jimin.

I’m not sure how long I dozed off but a loud sound brings me from my sleep. The sound of glass breaking is jarring in the empty house. Before I can even process the sound, I’m on my feet and running. I scramble up the stairs and into a random room, trying to close the door as quietly as possible behind me.

The smell of Jin swirls around me. I run into his closet and pull myself up the shelves like a ladder, pressing myself flat against the top shelf. My small form shouldn’t be visible from below. I can hear footsteps on the landing, and voices.

“We have to be fast. We don’t know how long they’re going to be gone,” The voice is rough and sends a shiver of fear down my spine.

“They should be gone long enough for us to find the girl. Although, this house is fucking massive,” Another voice grumbles,” We’ll have to search every room.

I hear the door to this room open and it feels like my heart is going to beat out of my chest. I have to hope that being surround by Jin’s clothes is enough to cover my scent. Omega’s tend to have more aggressive scents, they are naturally off put more. I can hear crashing in the room and I can feel my anxiety rising. When I hear the footsteps come toward me, I hold my breath. It feels like eternity but then they’re leaving this room and moving to the next.

I scramble back down the shelves and press my ear to the wall to see what I can hear. I peek out the door and, seeing the hallway empty, dash quickly down to Jungkook’s gym. I shut the door quietly and grab the bar from the bench press machine. It’s heavy but not too heavy for me to lift of swing. I hide behind the stacked mats. Jungkook must have cleaned up in here before his shower. I hold the bar close to me, ready to swing if I need to.

I feel a slight buzz in my pocket and remember the phone Jungkook had given me. I pull it out to see I have missed a couple calls and texts from the boys. I open my phone to the group chat and type just a few words. ‘There’s someone in the house.’ Then it goes back into my pocket. I’m glad that it was on silent.

It feels like forever before I hear the door to the gym open. Once again, things are crashing around. Then, the sound that sends shiver down my spine, the mats are being pulled out of the way. Then I’m face to face with a large black bear hybrid. His Alpha scent is aggressive. I swing before I can think, hitting him across the face. We’re both stunned for a second.

“Did you just-“ He’s cut off again as I stand to my full height and swing again. This one has my full strength behind hit. This time, he hits the ground hard, his head bouncing off the hardwood. I watch him for a few moments, waiting to see if he moves. He doesn’t get up, seemingly unconscious. Blood trickles from the spot on his head where the bar hit. I drop the bar, looking around the trashed room. I race out of the room, trying to think of where the best place to hide is. I don’t really want to deal with a pissed off bear when he comes to. Before I can make it to the stairs, my path is blocked by a different hybrid. I stop in my tracks, a leopard hybrid standing before me. He takes a step toward me and I step back, my eyes flicking around for a quick way to escape.

I leap up onto the bannister beside me, jumping down to the floor below, moving on instinct. I pitch forward in a roll, leaping to my feet and running into the kitchen. I can hear the leopard hit the floor behind me. I grab a knife from the knife block, clutching it tightly in both hands. He raises both hands, approaching me slowly.

“You wouldn’t want to do that,” He’s the grumbly voice from earlier,” We both know that you don’t want to hurt anyone.”

“Then leave,” There’s so much venom in my voice that it even surprises me. I can feel the adrenaline coursing through me.

He leaps at me and it’s like everything slows down. His body slams into the knife, the knife piercing through without any effort on my end. He must have thought I was bluffing, that I would drop the knife and try to run. I let the knife go but it stays in his stomach, his hands going to it as he collapses to the floor.

There’s blood on my hands. Seeing that sends me over the edge. The panic hits me hard and fast, and suddenly, it’s hard to breath. Tears well in my eyes and I can’t stop them, I can barely focus. I curl into a ball, moving as far away from the collapsed man as possible.

“Y/N!” The voice sounds far away. I can’t even focus enough to tell who it is.

Hands touch me and I flinch. I glance back to see a familiar shade of pink and the smell of spiced apples wraps around me. He wraps his arms around me, carrying me away from the man. Someone is crouched next to the man but I can’t see through the tears.

“Shhhh…. You’re okay. I’m right here. It’s okay,” Jimin coos, rocking me back in forth in his arms. It takes a long time, but his tight hug and gentle humming eventually pull me out of the panic attack. I’m so exhausted I can barely move. By the time I come out of it, everyone is here. Jungkook is dragging a very pissed off bear downstairs while Jin hovers over the stabbed leopard.

“I stabbed a man,” My voice is shaky and weak.

“Shhhh….. It’s fine. You did it to defend yourself. No one is mad at you,” He nuzzles my cheek.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” The words flow out of me without my permission. I think I’m in shock. I can’t focus on anything other than the knife stabbing into the leopard.

Jimin just holds me for a while, humming softly. I doze off in his arms, the exhaustion finally crashing into me full force. When I wake up, I can hear voices. I keep my eyes closed, listening.

“Is she okay?” Yoongi asks, concern in his voice.

“She was in shock. She stabbed someone, so I can’t blame her. She’s asleep right now, though,” Jimin’s voice is soft, his breath brushing my ear.

“They must have been keeping watch. They waited until we were all gone,” Jungkook this time. I can hear pacing footsteps.

“We can’t leave her alone again. I’m not giving them another opportunity,” Namjoon this time.

“It’ll have to be one of us then. Jin and Tae have actual jobs. They can’t skip days like the rest of us,” Hoseok speaks up.

“We’ll trade off. It doesn’t matter who stays, as long as someone does. They trashed most of the rooms, but a few are still intact,” Namjoon answers this time. “I would like to know how she knocked out that massive bear,” Jungkook laughs a little. His voice is close.

I open my eyes slowly, peering up at the underside of Jimin’s jaw. I shift a little to alert them that I’m awake. I can feel all eyes focused on me and it makes me nervous. I sit up in Jimin’s lap, lifting myself up to sit next to him, between him and Yoongi. I lean into Yoongi’s side.

“Baby, what happened?” Jungkook is the first to speak up.

“I was taking a nap on the couch and I heard glass break. I ran upstairs and into Jin’s room. I climbed the shelves in the closet to the top and laid flat. After they checked it, I snuck out and down to Jungkook’s gym room. I grabbed the bench press bar and hid behind the stacked mats. When he pulled the mats aside, I hit him with the bar. Twice. I tried to run downstairs but the leopard confronted me before I could get to the stairs. I jumped down from the bannister and ran into the kitchen. I held the knife in front of me and he jumped at me. I don’t know if he expected me to drop it, but I didn’t. I… stabbed him,” My voice chokes on the last few words. Yoongi rubs his hand up and down my back in a calming manner.

“It was self defense. You didn’t do anything wrong,” Hoseok’s voice is gentle.

“He’s going to be just fine. He just needed a few stitches and a blood transfusion. You didn’t hit any vital organs and the wound was relatively shallow. He’s already started to heal,” Jin gives me an encouraging smile as he speaks.

“Honestly, you didn’t even really stab him. The idiot just ran into your knife,” Jungkook pipes up,” Who jumps at someone holding a knife, hoping they’ll drop it? That’s dumb.”

“A few of the rooms survived the onslaught. Y/N’s, Tae’s, and mine. Looks like we’re bunking up for the night, guys. The cleaning crew will be here in the morning,” With that, everyone starts to get up from their spots on the floor. Yoongi gets up and then turns to help me up.

“Will you stay with me tonight?” My words are nearly whispered but his ears flick and his arms wrap around me. He presses a gentle kiss to my lips.

“Of course. I can even share if that will make you more comfortable,” He rests his forehead against mine for a moment before pulling back. I nod, already knowing who else to invite.

“I’ll meet you upstairs,” I turn and run off, looking for a specific person. It takes me some time, but I find him outside his room, peering through the door at the damage.

“Hey,” My voice is soft. He turns to face me.

“Hey,” His lips quirk up in a smile.

“I- would you mind…?” I trail off, my nerves becoming too much. I take a deep breath,” Would you mind staying with me tonight? I-I mean, Yoongi will be there too. I-I just-“

“Of course,” He gives me a bright smile.

“Really?” I can’t help but feel shocked. We hadn’t gotten to spend much time together so I was surprised that he agreed so quickly. He’s just so comfortable to around, like Yoongi.

“If it will make you more comfortable, than I really don’t mind. I might even enjoy it,” His tone is teasing this time.

“Thank you, Hoseok,” I feel breathless. Somehow, I’m nervous that he’s going to be staying with me.

“Call me Hobi. Everyone else does,” He throws an arm around my shoulders,” Come on, before Yoongi finds a way to take up the whole bed.”

Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed! Chapter Four soon!!

[snickerdoodlles]

Hi hello me!!! I would like a headcanon please!! 🤲🥰

❤️❤️.

Chay does not like Khun or Kinn when he first meets them. it takes special circumstances for him to shake his first assessments of them to even give them a chance.

Khun’s the easy one—he and Chay match well in personality (the mutual sass when they introduce themselves my beloved!! 🥰) and while they don’t share the same interests, they have enough overlap they have a lot of fun hanging out together. But after their introduction, the parts of Khun that Chay sees are him trying to cope with the chaos Korn’s stirring and Khun’s coping mechanisms, dissociation, and distancing from the stress and triggers come off as very dismissive and even cruel. Chay doesn’t understand it, he doesn’t know Khun well enough to, and he doesn’t try to (why would he? this mafia family ruined his life)

In my mind, the changing point for their relationship comes after the finale gunfight—Porsche begs Chay to stay with Khun because they’re stretched thin and Khun’s spaces are the safest place for him right now. Chay hates it, but accepts it for Porsche, figuring he’ll just hide in a corner or something and ignore everyone.

But, at some vague point during all this, an alarm goes off. Turns out to be a false alarm, but before they figure that out, Chay watches Khun lock down his room, locate his brothers and Porsche, hunt down the problem, etc—basically Khun goes full protective mother bear in every way he can, and a few things start clicking for Chay. because he too is extremely protective of his loved ones but limited in what he can do, and it completely reframes his view of Khun and who he is.

Kinn and Chay’s relationship takes a lot more work.

The first problem is that they have a fundamental personality clash—Chay’s whole thing is that he draws a circle around the people he cares about and guards them jealously. He wants to share their burdens and make sure they’re happy. Chay would burn the world for the people in his circle, consequences be damned. And for a very, very long time, Porsche is the only person in that circle. Kim is the second. Chay hasn’t even considered adding anyone else yet.

Kinn also cares a lot about his people, but his whole thing is taking on all his people’s burdens. He gave up his dream to become the heir for Khun. Kim never would’ve been able to go to college and stay mostly out of mafia business the way he does without Khun and Kinn supporting him completely. Kinn plays his cards to protect other people (Porsche) more than himself and he’ll put himself in the line of fire to protect any of his guards. Kinn’s circle is huge, and quick to expand. Chay doesn’t get Kinn.

Plus, Chay’s upset and kinda jealous Kinn’s so important to Porsche. He hasn’t gotten the chance to deal with the fact that Porsche abandoned him for weeks to go take care of other people—he knows Porsche was coerced and he’s pissed about that too, but Porsche chose to lie—and now Porsche is confiding in Kinn the way he never did with him. Chay’s still pissed about everything in general. He wasn’t happy when Porsche asked if he could take care of him and Kinn, his face just screamed ‘he’s rich and has a whole building of guards, why do you have to take care of him’, but this was also the first time Porsche has ever asked him for anything and Chay will always compromise for the people in his drawn circle, so of course Chay said yes. But the mafia still ruined their lives, is continuing to ruin their lives, and Kinn is the face of said mafia. Entirely fair? No. He’s mostly pissed at Korn, and Kinn’s getting some of that anger just because he’s available whereas Chay doesn’t interact with Korn. But these sorts of feelings aren’t rational, and Chay’s too trapped in it all right now to get a chance to even safely think through and process how he really feels. So for now, Chay’s just scared and trapped and angry and hiding all of it under overt politeness and courtesy and running away from him as soon as he can make an excuse.

Now, I do actually think Kinn and Chay will become really good in-laws one day, I can see them getting on together spectacularly.

But not without getting rid of Korn first. Or at least some extenuating circumstances that give them a break from Korn’s shadow where they have a chance to have a good heart-to-heart. It’s actually one of my favorite scenarios to throw at them in fics in general, Chay’s straightforward approach to life plus Kinn’s caution and determination make for a wonderful combination in Getting Shit Done 🥰

anyways the tl;dr of this is the only Theerapanyakul Chay instantly gets on with is Kim, the others have a mountain to climb first

Send an ask, get a headcanon

[justthisgirlsworld]

Usually I’m the one giving out advice on here, but I think it’s my time to ask you guys now.

Ever since breaking up with my ex, my life has gone downhill.

Now, don’t get me wrong, getting back with him would NOT solve my problems. He moved on insanely fast. Ridiculed me. Threatened me. Sexually assaulted me. Was possessive and controlling and overall made me lose myself and reduced me to nothing but a stay at home, housewife in our future plans (which is a lovely life, but, it’s not me at all).

But, I’ve since lost a lot of friends? At first, everyone was on my side, backing me up, but slowly, they got bored of it and just started talking to him again. Even friends of mine who weren’t overly keen of him when we were dating are now wanting to, or even going ahead and talking to him, exclaiming that I can’t choose who people can talk to and that there are “two sides to every story.”

They are right, I’m aware of that. But, I would love some loyalty!!

I wasn’t perfect in the relationship, I know that too. I could be stressy, and at times, over emotional. Taking out my stress from the day on him. But, for the majority of the time, I kept up this act of perfection. I was nurturing, and maternal, and loving and his perfect, pretty trophy for him to show off. I stopped listening to music I liked, because he didn’t like it, stopped wearing clothes I liked, because he didn’t like them, cut off certain friends, because he didn’t like them - and put up with his friends constantly ridiculing me, just for him to never defend me.

I feel incredibly lonely. I’ve tried so hard to put myself out there, to make new friends after having my life revolve around him for the past two and a half years - but everyone else has pre-established connections and so they don’t care much for me. Plus, I can be quiet and awkward around new people.

It frustrates me to see him so easily get into a new relationship, and be surrounded by close (but not particularly nice) friends, even having my own friends go and speak to him now. I don’t know what to do.

My only gratification in this scenario is that, since splitting up, I am much more free and comfortable within myself than I was with him. I can wear what I like. Speak to who I please. Have opinions of my own and not have to worry about him freaking out because I said or did the “wrong” thing. I don’t constantly have his hands on me, and I’m not forced into doing sexual favours for a man that I felt constantly sick and headachy around. I no longer have greasy hair, nor break out because I am not around him anymore. Not only that, but, I look so much more beautiful. I am glowing (if I do say so myself). For a while, I slipped back into old eating disorder habits, and so, lost a lot of weight. I was already borderline underweight, so this wasn’t good. But I’m back on track now, with less weight in my face, beautifully dyed hair, makeup skills on point, a defined style and my old confidence back.

I just wish that the social aspect of my life was improved? I know I can’t just manifest a friendship, or, relationship and hope it to somehow fall into my lap. I just think, if I had a best friend, or, a guy/girl showed interest in me - maybe things would be a bit easier? What do you guys think? And do you have any tips for me?

[hanarchy]

What kills me is that members always reference currently popular skz memes/topics on bubble or lives so they definitely see what's going on, yet some of the members keep praising it on bubble

While now a lot of stays support this collab, with coca cola most of the fandom were boycotting and all the comments were full of it too still that didn't stop fl from drinking it on his live

Yeah like. god. This is gonna be a long answer but bear with me anon.

There are a few things I know to be true abt skz (and most idols tbh)

1. They are online (all that time spent in hair and makeup, waiting to perform, on a random plane or car. They have a lot of hours where they‘re at work without having to be mentally present, we all know they scroll, plus there‘s the lives and everything else).

2. They are in control of their music. They‘ve said this, it‘s their whole concept. No more discussion on this.

3. They‘re not really allowed/have decided not to be political (rmb that vlive where hyunjin chose a colored heart before soko elections and had to redo the whole thing bc the color was associated with a political party?)

4. They have contracts with JYPE and its unlikely they‘re allowed to back out of collabs like coca cola.

5. Individually they have also made questionable choices. The louis vuitton ambassadorship is honestly top of my list bc LVMH is engaged in industries that buy blood diamonds, do animal testing for cosmetics, have had parts in several labor disputes and the owners have a long laundry list of shit that they fucked up severely. Literally the richest family in france and LV is their flagship brand (Loewe is also part of it btw.). The Versace parent company is not much better. Tommy Hilfiger is obviously fucked and it has been like that for a while.

6. They are ambitious and in the industry they‘re in, that means they want to make more and more money. Because that means more promos, more artistic control, more fame, bigger halls etc.

I don‘t believe them to be bad people I just believe them to be apolitical people. In my book that‘s not really a thing (if you‘re not political you choose the status quo which in this case means fucking genocide.) BUT, crucially, people who don‘t care about politics beyond their arms reach or don‘t understand politics often care deeply about the people in their lives, about their work, about their direct environment. Skz are in an incredibly busy and stressful line of work and they were plunged into that world at an age when most people haven‘t or are just starting to develop political opinions. They‘re also from a culture that places very high value on respect(-ability), on not causing a stir and conforming to expectations (this is not a dig on korean culture btw, I think many aspects of this are actually positive, more individualistic cultures are not better, I am just focusing on a topic where these things have an unfortunate impact). In a highly individualistic culture like the US it‘s a lot easier for artists to express political opinions and make political art because they‘re expected to (and look how few even do it there, celebrity culture is laughable). Idols are expected to provide entertainment first and foremost, no more individuality than the company allows.

It makes sense that they are how they are. If all you‘ve ever worked for is a music career in a rigid industry where your every move is scrutinized of course you‘re not likely to make bold moves. But that doesn‘t make it right and it doesn‘t make their decisions better.

What I‘m trying to say is that I don‘t blame them for being how they are but I also entered this kpop life being aware of this. I‘ve stopped placing political expectations on celebrities. I don‘t need them to be political, I am political enough, that‘s not their purpose in my life.

I want them to speak to the part of me that dreams and that idealizes and that loves. But bc that‘s their role in my life it‘s jarring when suddenly their values and mine seem completely misaligned because the part of me that dreams and fantasizes is the part of me that also imagines a better world. Strange to know that they‘re ok with living in the existing world if they themselves live well.

[ineffectualdemon]

I cried all over my husband like two hours ago because my brain finally processd why my mood has been so low and I have been struggling so much

I'm grieving

I'm grieving a lot of things

A lot of it is grieving the loss of my favourite seasons

This isn't about climate change (though that is a part of it) but autumn has always been mh favourite season and the last several years I've been kinda fighting really hard mentally for it to remain that way even though that's no longer true

The space between September 1st and December 31st was, for a large part of my life, my favourite time of the year. I love Halloween and my birthday and Christmas!

I love the food and the scents and the atmosphere

It was when it was colder but usually not too cold and I was happy

But for a good chunk of time it's not been great

I have had 3 beloved family members die between the end of August and Christmas

September and October are the most stressful times of the year because it's my husband's busy period and a rough transition time for Kiddo when it comes to school and that's a lot

The cold and damp hit me hard around mid November through the end of February so I'm just in more and more physical pain as we get closer to Christmas. And that's on a good year. On a bad year like this one I've been battling a lot of health issues since September. The new health issues plus the yearly increase in pain means I am exhausted and unable to do much

So my previous favourite time of the year is now filled with stress and pain

And I still enjoy the actual holidays and my birthday but not the time in between anymore

And I felt guilty because my inlaws want us to stay with them for two nights over Christmas and I don't know if I can because I am struggling with pain so much right now

And I'm grieving people, the loss of my favourite season and the loss of everything else my disabilities have taken from me

I have lost so many things that made me happy and it makes me feel like it's my fault some how and it makes me afraid to be happy. It makes me afraid that the few things I have left that bring me happiness will be taken away

It makes me feel like I'm not allowed happiness

Logically I know that's not true but it feels true too often

I'm really just ranting here but I'm not doing great right now and I think this is why

[safety-pin-punk]

Hi!

I’m sort of still getting into punk and learning about everything. You’re blog has been really helpful with resources and everything. Plus your cool.

Okayyy, now my question. I’m a junior in high school and I want to go to college. Pursue further education and all of that stuff. Learn more about the world and critical thinking. But I don’t want to pay a ton of money to a bunch of old ivy dudes.

What’s the right direction to go in for this? Is college a good option if I want to learn? What schools are good places? Where do I learn more about this stuff?

Sorry if this is a lot. Thank you though!

Hey! Thank you for your kindness!!

First off, Im going to stress that you are a junior and you have PLENTY of time to think about this. So dont stress too much right now.

Secondly, I want to preface this with the simple fact of college isnt for everyone. There are SO many ways to survive and thrive in life without it. And thats okay, good even! That being said, this post is just gonna be me talking about college. Under the cut of course

OKAY! So, is college a good option if you want to learn? My answer is yes! I learned a lot at college, both inside and outside my classes. I learned a lot of life lessons, I met people from all over the country (and a few international students). And I learned how to challenge my own beliefs and try to see things from perspectives that I didnt even know could exist prior to college.

But Im sure you were referring to the educational aspect. And truth be told, this heavily depends on both your school and you. Some examples: My school had a phenomenal chemistry program. You couldnt walk out of that program without having learned things if you made it through. But my school also had a very poor fine arts program. And to be quite blunt, I often wondered why any art student chose to stay. But going even further, it depends a lot on the individual as well. I was admittedly not the best student. I wasnt that interested in lab or research compared to some of my classmates, nor did I apply myself as much. And the difference is clear to see when others could rattle off different solvents and what reactions would occur from memory and I would be sitting there dumbfounded.

Next question, what schools are good places? Again, that fully depends on what you want to go to school for. But I’ll tell you what I did and how I chose my school. When I was a junior in high school, I found a list of every 4 year university in my state (I knew I wanted to stay in state, but you can do this for wherever you want to go). I then went through and gave each school a ranking out of 5 (based on vibes, chemistry program, education program, cost, and surrounding area). Once I had it narrowed down to only a few schools, those were the ones I toured. And I chose where to send applications from there.

Though, I cant stress enough how beneficial community college can be. A lot of people get all their gen eds out of the way either before they enroll in a university or over summers. Doing this will save you money and time. Literally not a single person on a university campus would look down on you for this. If anything, they will praise you for being smart. I took a few classes over the summers between semesters just to get them out of the way (and also avoid certain professors).

Where to learn more? Google. Google schools near you. Google schools where you want to go. Google schools ranked nationally in xyz. Google affordable universities. Google universities that have good financial aid programs. Just google so many things. From there, spend time exploring university websites. Read about their community and their academic programs. See if they have virtual tours uploaded. Check out their student activity board social medias to see what it would be like to be there as a student. Sign up for tours. Do an overnight visit if you can!! Or even, just walk around the campus without a tour guide

Best of luck to you on your academic journey! Hope I was a little helpful here