#my joyful heart lives on 😭😭

[donghun-s]

we got a partial jbj reunion in 2023 yall im so 😭😭

[hemmingsleclerc]

Hi! Could you write a fic with dad!Carlos x reader, where they have twins, and they're in a family gathering, they're playing UNO with the kids, each has one twin, but then Carlos loses, reader won, and pretenting to be super offended and says reader cheated, and everybody is siding with her, including the twins, and he pretends to cry, and the kids feel bad and hug and kiss their daddy? Thank you! <3

UNO! ┃CS55

note: ugh I love dad!Carlos 😭💕 this request was soo funny, I loved it

The Sainz family gathered for a joyful family reunion, and laughter echoed through the living room. Carlos and his wife Y/N watched over their energetic twins, Adrian and Noah, as they ran around the room, their laughter mingling with their voices.

"Alright, who wants to play a game?!" Y/N asked. Carlos approached the large table in the living room with different board games and the twins approached the table excitedly to grab their places.

''UNO! Please!'' Noah shouted holding up the deck of brightly colored cards.

''Yes! I love that game!'' Adrian nodded in agreement

''Alright, UNO will be''

Carlos smiled, knowing that a game of UNO with his lively twins was always chaos. "Are you guys ready?" he asked, ruffling Adrian's hair as he sat at the table next to him.

Adrian nodded enthusiastically, his eyes shining with anticipation. "Yes, Dad! We'll beat Mommy, right, Noah?"

Noah nodded, his small hand clutching a handful of UNO cards. ''Of course, because I will win!''

The game began with cheers and jokes. Y/N and Carlos teamed up with one of the twins each, creating a competition. As the game progressed, laughter filled the room and the twins' infectious giggles warmed their parents' hearts.

''Come on Noah!'' Carlos said frustrated, ''Why do you always give me +4 cards?''

Noah giggled ''Sorry papá''

However, luck seemed to favor Y/N and Noah as they drew card after card, inching closer to victory. Carlos and Adrián exchanged determined looks, but despite their best efforts, their stack of cards steadily grew thanks to Y/N's strategies.

Finally, with a triumphant smile, Y/N laid down her last card, declaring herself the winner. "UNO!" she exclaimed, her eyes full of joy and amusement as she watched Carlos throw his stack of cards onto the table.

Carlos's jaw dropped in mock disbelief, his playful expression turning into an exaggerated pout. "No, c'mon! You cheated, amor! You must have! I was winning," he exclaimed, feigning offense.

Y/N rolled her eyes playfully and her laughter filled the room. "Oh, come on, Carlos! You're just jealous because you lost fairly, once again I proved to be the best at this game, accept it cariño."

The room erupted in laughter as Carlos continued his charade, pretending to be deeply hurt by his defeat. "But…but…I thought we were a team, Adrian!" He said, turning to his son with feigned disappointment when he saw how he celebrated his mother's victory.

Adrian giggled, shaking his head. "Sorry, daddy! Mommy's the best at UNO!"

"No fair, Noah! You're supposed to be on my team!" Carlos exclaimed, turning to his other son, who simply grinned in response.

The rest of the family joined in, mocking Carlos affectionately as he continued his theatrics, pretending to wipe away imaginary tears while covering his face. However, the twins, sensing his father's distress, exchanged a worried look.

"Papá, you're the best in the world!" Adrian declared, throwing his arms around Carlos in a tight hug.''Please don't cry! We didn't want to make you feel bad''

Noah joined in, wrapping his little arms around Carlos's neck. "We love you, papá!"

Carlos's heart filled with warmth as he hugged his children tightly, his playful façade fading. Y/N watched everything fondly as she saw her husband along with their little children.

With a satisfied smile, Carlos leaned down to plant a kiss on the forehead of each of his twins. "I love you both more than anything in the world," he whispered, his voice choked with emotion.

[raygirlramblings]

A certain eggplant finally learnt how to take a decent selfie.

Lots of joyful nattering and dlc spoilers under the cut

oh my GOD the Phantom Show DLC was THE GOOD STUFF. Precious, delightful bean man looking SO GOOD in 3D again. The seemingly endless references and little side jokes scattered all over the place, The Phantom dropping some scalding tea…and then you had Rayman developing a friendship with these oddballs and I swear my heart grew three sizes.

Seriously, the creators of this dlc got it so right. Rayman had a bit of PTSD, but once he got past that to face a greater foe he was bouncing around with RPeach and RMario like there’s no tomorrow. And the ENDING 😭 I’m so happy to see Rayman and RMario lived up to my hopes of being Punching Pals XD. And then RPeach giving Ray a gift and HIM GIVING THEM A GIFT TO TAKE HOME I CANNOT I MUST CRY.

I’ve seen people say this is a means of burying the hatchet between Ray and the Rabbids, and I’m inclined to agree. Sure, Rayman still has his misgivings but he’s quick to understand that most of the Rabbids in the tv station are just trying to make entertainment and do good…so much so he’s willing to stay behind to help them 😭. There will be bad or troublesome Rabbids out there (cough Kanya cough) but Rayman seems to have genuinely built a solid friendship with RPeach and RMario (and Beep-O!) knowing they have his back if he ever needs their help.

Obviously I’m disappointed Ray didn’t get to hang out with Mario and pals (or my beloved Edge *sniffle*) BUT the energy and love the team poured into this DLC is a huge step forward for Rayman and I’m so happy to have been able to experience it. I can only hope it will lead to new and greater thing for best bean 💖

Now we have Captain Lazerhawk to look forward to 😉

[hearts4werka]

NNN day 9 | Shattered Promises

summary: a dangerous war was declared, the one thing you feared would happen in your life ever since your husband Matthew joined the military. The fear of him possibly dying out on the battlefield without a proper goodbye always managed to deliver you nightmares and now your worst fear came true, Matthew had to go off to fight for his country. Is he going to make it and come back home safely, or maybe you’ll forever hold the weight of him in your heart even without him among the living?

warnings: ANGST, military, war, violence mentioned, possible murder, missing limbs, dark times, happy ending (or is it?), sorrow, depressive times, vivid nightmares, triggering content & possibly more! Viewers advisory is supervised and proceed with caution!

authors note: we’re almost there at the double digits! Kinda got this random vibe today and the idea just popped into my head, this is gonna take a lot of military vibe music to get me through this and keep me in the spirit, I’m sorry as this can be kinda inaccurate in some ways 😭, luv yall and hope y’all enjoy this one

no nut november | masterlist | guestlist

- a month before the war

Laughter fills the air as our joyful golden retriever, Danny continues to jump and deliver eager licks to the side of his face while he lays down on the couch next to me, the television shadowing a soft glow over our faces alongside sunlight pooling in the room, dancing along the shadows of the living room. “Hey, Danny! Calm down there buddy!” He calls out, chuckling between each word, I observe the playful fight, thinking nothing bad could ever happen to our small little family with our fur baby. My hand slithers its way over to pet and ruffle the hairs on Danny's spine.

The whole moment was filled with pure enjoyment and true love, my heart twisting with delight as Matt finally managed to lure Danny off from on top of him and shelds himself with my body, grabbing a hold of my biceps and pull me in front of him. My laughter only intesifying as now Danny begins devoting his attention off Matt to me, hopping onto my chest but this time without eager licks and just relaxes against me, Matt dramatically gasps but a sweet chuckle quickly overpowers it, "Looks like someone has a favorite parent." He jokes, slipping out from under my body and sitting down before me.

After another playful moment passing by, Danny begins to feel tired and snuggles into Matts lap and slowly drifts into peaceful sleep. A romance movie plays in the background as me and Matt starts to chat in soft whispers to not wake up our fur baby. Admiring how at peace and happy he seems in a simple moment like this, feeling like nothing could take away the joy we've build throughout these years of our relationship, I let myself rest my head down onto Matts shoulder, tiredness now shadowing my features. "I got two little cute sleepyheads now, wanna go to bed now?" I nod my head and murmur a positive response.

Slowly and gently removing Danny off his lap to stand up, straightening his legs and turning his head to look at my sleepy form that’s now beginning to fall asleep. He walks over and picks up my body, bridal style just like he had on our wedding and every time I was tired, as well as at unexpected times. I loved him dearly and would never let anything bad happen to him, I was always a deep sleeper but ever since Matthew decided to join the military I was afraid about him possibly dying on the battlefield and I couldnt bear the dark thoughts roaming inside of my mind, it started with simple flashes of him in my mind but then turned into full nightmares I couldn’t bear.

It started flashing his image as he carried me over to our bedroom and laid me down, covering my body with the duvet before undressing himself and sliding under it next to me, he wraps a warm arm around me and pulls me into his chest, nuzzling his face into my hair as a feeling of safety washes over me but when I close my eyes I can only see him, laying on the ground-shot and dead- while his buddies drag his limp to the side for shelter, trying to revive him back to live but without proper medical care it was impossiple for them to. My heart twisted with sorrow as my eyes immediately pop open, unable to fall asleep no matter how hard I tried. I shift my body to face Matt and hide my face in his chest while clutching onto his body as if I would lose him then and there.

- Present day

The morning approaches, sun barely rising over the horizon, casting a warm soft glow over our bodies as I throw the duvet off my body. Seeing Matthew is stil asleep so I make it my misson to quietly get dressed and exit the room, feeling like doing wanting to do something special I decided to make a hot breakfast for him when he decides to wake up. As soon as Danny catches a glimpse of me walking down the stairs he immediatly runs over and demands some head scraches as well as sustenance, chuckling at how much energy he has in the morning, "Oh you want some head scraches? I'll give you some head scarches, you little cutie." He follows me into the kitchen, grabbing his feeding bowl and placing it on the countet but as I was about to get his food I hear something weird from the radio, immediately turning up the volume to hear more context and its coming from the news.

"Welcome everybody, your news-reporter speaking. The United States Of America has declared war upon another country and we need every soldier we can grasp over the age of 18, this is not a drill but a serious war our country is under. Please seek immediate shelter and consider flying out of the country for safety if youre near any of there states..."

I immediately freeze, being unable to move as the other words coming from the reporter become irrelevant to my brain, "every soldier they can grasp" my brain cannot comprehend the state of fear I am before Im pulled out of my thoughts when Matthew comes rushing down the stairs, seeming like he just woke up telling by his messy hair falling over his forehead. He walks over to me, seeing how scared I have become and places a reassuring kiss on my forehead, “It’s going to be okay, darling. I'm going to be fine, I wont leave you." He softly speaks, assuming I've hear all of it on the radion while he got a call, cradling me in his arms and kissing the top of my head to calm me down in any bit, he's known this was my worst fear and the repeative vivid dreams I've woken up to multiple times and him trying to calm my nerves.

He pulls away from the embrace and leans down to be face level with me, his expression softening as my eyes become glossy and shiny with worried tears swirling around in them. "I promise I will come back to you as soon as I get back, you can come with me to the pickup bus." He reassures, wiping away the slowly sliding tear with his thumb on my cheek. My arms wrap around his neck and pull him back in, feeling as this could be the last time we speak and feel each others warm embrace. "I'll go get ready now." He pulls away before turning around and walking back upstairs to dress himself more properly and apropriate, my soul eternally freaking out and not wanting this to be real. Maybe its just a dream-yeah a dream-now I just have to wake up from this nightmare of a day, oh wait, its actually very much real life. Soon I follow Matt into our bedroom and dress myself properly as well, getting rid of the pyjamas and now in outside clothes.

- At the pickup spot

As we approached the bus, my heart ached and twisted in various ways that made me feel sick to my stomach. Other familys and couples surrounded the bus, saying goodbyes and crying as they got on the bus. Matt holds my hand before turning to face me and pulls me into a soft kiss which only lasted a minute before he had to pull away, "Be safe and please don't die out there." I stammered, full of worry and fear for his life. the news reporter stated it would be a dangerous and serious war which only heightened my pulse, for now I had to take his words and cling onto them as much as I can for them to be true. He gave me a last reassuring kiss on the forehead before he got onto the bus, some of his buddies recognised me and I recognized them since Matthew would have them over often and before they got onto the bus to join Matt, they walked over to me and suddenly picked me up into the air. "woah, guys, what are you doing?-" I questioned but without a response in return, they carried me over to where Matt was sitting, he popped his head though the window and suddenly kissed me, I melted right into it and kissed him back almost immediately. It was filled with pure true love and caring, the world around me disappeared and the happy cheers of others started to become more faint to my ears, all of my worries disolve into the air and my only value left was the moment right now.

By the time we pull away, the driver calls out for everyone to get on board as they will be driving away soon, they let me down onto the ground and hop onto the bus themselves, from a distance now I watch as they close the doors and drive away, a feeling of loss washes over me which I can’t brush away no matter how hard I want to trust his words that he’ll be okay but it seems thats a promise he can’t make. I leave the spot and get into Matt’s car in which be drove us here in, feeling his scent lingering still in the air as I drive off back home.

- a year after the start of the war

Everyday after Matthew’s gone off to fight for his country’s freedom, I’ve waited patiently for him to return back home, dreaded the time I would hold him in my arms again, feel his lips on mine or him holding me and calming me down after a terrible nightmare. They’ve only became more intense and I couldn’t bear being alone anymore but got used to it after awhile, everyday I would plant a single white rose in his name since he always loved gifting them to me to remind me of his love and now it reminds me of him, now that a year has passed I could have a whole garden of them.

I was sitting outside infront of my collection of white roses as the sun shined, the sun ever started to remind me of him, of how brightly his smile would light up any room he walked in. My poor baby, gazing upon the growing garden and every single time get reminded of him so I never forget him, I could never forget my poor baby. He was the only man I’ve truly loved and wanted to grow old together, now the only thing I have are reminders of him and dissolving hope of him still being alive out there. “Please come back, my darling.” I murmur under my breath before suddenly being ripped out from my thoughts.

My phone buzzes, indicating an incoming call, I pick up my phone and pick it up, putting on my professional voice and serious face instead of the broke woman I was, “Hello?” I spoke into the receiver, waiting for the caller to speak. “Hello, is this Ms. Sturniolo?” My eyebrows furrow in confusion and skepticism, it slowly easing into my voice. “Yes, this is she. I-Im sorry but who’s calling?” “A former friend of his from the army, I’m here to inform you that your husband Matthew Sturniolo has been pronounced dead duo to a fatal shot in the arm and bleeding out while on the battlefield”

I freeze, the words slowly sinking in before my phone drops on the grassy ground, here I was grasping onto the lasts of my hope that he’s still alive and now he is presumed dead, my hands cover my face as uncontrollable sobs leave my mouth. Tears staining my face and hands, I can’t believe this, he promised he would come back, he… is dead. The worst of my fears has now came true and it hit me like a thousand bricks, I feel something shatter inside of me beyond repair.

I feel… broken? Like a part of me has been ripped out of me without my permission, he has became a part of me and build me into the person I am today, but without him by my side I don’t think I can continue being the same person and living my life normally, he was the only man I’ve loved truly and now he has been taken away from me. What have I done to deserve such punishment? I continue to lay on the ground, consumed by complete depression and a feeling of loss. That night I haven’t returned to my house and slept outside in front of the white roses, the thing that reminded me the most of my dear husband.

- a month after Matthew being presumed dead

The sun slowly rose up over the horizon and I was off to go preform my mundane routine, getting out of bed has been the hardest part every morning and, every emotion has been wiped off my face after… you know after what, I slumped over to my dresser and thrown on a pair of sweatpants and a hoodie I stole from Matthew, his specific scent still lingering on it. Walking downstairs, I walk into the kitchen and grab Danny’s bowl, filling it with food and placing it back down in its spot, he doesn’t greet me anymore, the only thing he has been doing besides eating was sit outside near Matthew’s grave in which I would join him every morning, I placed a hand crafted cross on the top of my white rose garden to indicate his grave, some of the older ones have started to wither and loose their beautiful white petals.

It reflects the feelings I feel, being like a withered white rose without him by my side, slowly loosing my color with each passing minute. I exit the house and drop down beside our dog, gazing upon the grave before I speak in a soft voice in hopes that he’s somewhere here, listening to the words I speak from my broken heart. “I wish you could be here with me, I can’t be the same person without you. If you’re listening to me, I love you more than anything in the world.” Every word stings the same amount, my throat feeling tight as I feel tears swirling in my eyes.

“Why wish when I’m right here?”

The sudden words take me out of my focus, the voice sounding too familiar to miss, looking around as my eyes catch a glimpse of Matthew. Wait… Matthew?- I stare at him as he suddenly is walking towards me but there’s something different about him-he’s missing an arm-so he isn’t dead after all? I could be imagining things, I wipe my teary eyes before he extends his arms, my body immediately rising from the ground and running into his warm embrace, feeling the touch I’ve dreaded to be able to feel again on my skin.

“I told you I would come back.” He happily cheered, holding me in his embrace and placing a lingering kiss on my forehead. I feel like myself again, the part of me I thought I lost forever has returned, Danny comes running at us and jumps up and down, wagging his tail aggressively in joy. “I-I thought you were dead, I thought I lost you forever… I-I seriously can’t believe you’re alive, you know they called-“ before I could finish my sentence, he smashes his lips against mine and stopped me from ranting for half an hour about what it was without him for all of this time without him. I slightly relax into the kiss, our dog barked and we chuckled into the kiss together, today I was put back together and felt like myself again now with Matthew beside me again. I’m me again, my other half has returned into its place, I’ll be forever grateful for the lord letting him live and stay with me in earth longer. My poor baby has finally returned and that’s all that matters to me right now.

Guestlist!

| - @sturnsxplr-25 - @strnzzvsp - @luvvs4chriss - @sturniolosweetheart33 - @pussypie456 - @choclatestarfishwithahat - @venusxsturnio - @bagsbyclair0 - @sturnstvs - @dykes4chris - @hoe4matt - @cayleeuhithinknot - @strnilolover - @marrykisskilled - @phone4pills - @emely9274 - @cupiidk1lls - @lily-strnlo - @nicksgirlfriend - |

[wonton4rang]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Super shy ¡!

pairing: riwoo x reader.

warnings: +18, smut. pet names, edging, humping, usage of riwoo's real name, sanghyeok.

summary: where riwoo is the pretty nerd you've got stuck with to make a project but what you didn't know is that he might not be as innocent and shy as he seemed to be.

note: i've been devastated since that video of bnd dropped and i saw riwoo, i have a MASSIVE crush on him omg 😭 i'm so sorry to anyone and everyone that doesn't knows this look on him 😔 pd. (update: 06/17) if you see any typos, no, you didn't <3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

you were never the type to be too talkative, you had your own space and didn't like to go out, your homework was up to date even if you didn't like to study and you had very few to none friends. you were surviving high school, to be honest.

but there was always someone that was worst than you, in this case, it was sanghyeok. he was the catalogued nerd of the class, his prescription glasses always on his nose bridge while his face got covered by some science book. he was even more quiet than you were, he had a single friend (donghyun) and you have never seen him at any place outside of school.

when you saw him for the first time, he was laughing with his best friend over god knows what, his smile being so gorgeous that you couldn't help but stare; the way his brown hair was done flawlessly and it dropped the perfect amount of hair to adorn his face. he looked so cute with those huge glasses and that soft hoodie, not the mention the lovely smell that he had when you walked pass him.

you immediately got a passenger crush on him.

it wasn't like you would die for him or anything but seeing him everyday made your own day a little better, he made your chest clench and your heart feel soft and joyful when he laughed, which didn't happen very often.

he was just so cute.

so when you got assigned that chemistry project and you both got together at his place to do it, you couldn't help the subtle blush that spread through your cheeks when you arrived at his door and knocked, him opening almost right away and giving you that smile that you liked so much.

"hey, come inside" he signalled when he moved from the frame, you entering the place almost instantly, checking around before you heard the door close and sanghyeok appeared in front of you "donghyun-ah it's not here today so it'll just be us, hope you don't mind...?"

"that's okay" you assured with a small smile, adoring the doubt on his voice when he talked to you. so pretty. "i didn't know you guys lived together"

"yeah, it's cheaper than living by yourself on campus, rent is for the elite at this point" you nodded while you followed his steps to the second floor, he was right. "but how are you doing? are you ready for today?"

"i hate chemistry, sanghyeok-ssi" was all you let out, not even noticing when you both got to his room until that familiar perfume filled your nostrils and made you look around "we're gonna do it here?"

"do you mind? i have most of my stuff here and he doesn't want any-"

"that's okay" sanghyeok just looked at you through his glasses, smirking a little bit before closing the door "so... um, where do we start?"

"why don't we start from the beginning?" he suddenly asked and it made you tilt your head in confusion "why don't you tell me since when do you like me?"

what the fuck.

you stayed silent for a second, frowning your eyebrows and holding your backpack laces tighter, taking a step back when he took one forward to you.

"why aren't you saying anything? i thought you loved to talk"

"sanghyeok, what is this?"

"you look really pretty in a skirt, y/n" was all he said back, finally taking a long step and closing the distance between your bodies, holding your waist with a firm grip and making you stumble back when he leaned forward to smell your neck "i also like your perfume, by the way"

"y-you... you know?" all the shame in the world belonged to you right now, your hands sweating against your backpack's strings and your legs trembling, not to mention the aggressive blush that flushed your cheeks. "i'm- i-"

"can i kiss you?" and that's when you knew that he was not interested in any project, that he didn't invite you over for that.

but it was so weird, so out of place, you even thought that you may be misreading the situation (if that was even possible), even when his hands gripped your waist firmly, his eyes staring into yours and his breath hitching when he got closer to your mouth.

there's no way this is sanghyeok, not the one you know, at least. this is not the shy boy that would look away if your eyes ever meet, the small and soft baby boy that used sweater paws. it just doesn't make sense to you.

where was his soft demeanor, his glittery eyes, his way of talking so calmed. it was all a lie? no, it wasn't, you just didn't know sanghyeok as a lover.

at least not until now.

"are you still thinking?" his voice brought you back, your hands loosening the grip on your backpack and going up to his chest, staring into his eyes.

"yes, you can kiss m-"

he didn't even wait for you to finish when his lips crashed against yours. he had been waiting for it long enough to waste another second. so he didn't.

his hands went up to remove your backpack and drop it to the ground, his lips devouring yours in such a way that it made your legs feel weak, your own hands now holding his shoulders.

when you felt his body press against yours, you softly moaned, applying pressure on his shoulders and smiling into the kiss when he took the chance to get his tongue into your mouth, playing with your sanity when his right knee pressed against your clothed pussy and he made some friction.

everything was so good that you didn't notice the way your back was flat in the wall behind you, your right leg being held up on sanghyeok's hip and his hands slowly rising up and down on what you skirt covered and what it didn't too.

"wait, sanghyeok-ssi" you managed to whisper against the kiss, pulling out to look at his face. his hair slightly misplaced and his glasses were fogged up with your breath. he looked so cute yet so hot. "what do you want to do?"

"i-" suddenly it seemed like his shy self came back, his throat not being able to form a correct sentence and his hands shaking against your skin. you laughed a little. "don't laugh at me"

"you look so cute"

"i don't want to be cute" his voice sounded mad but still cute so you just nodded and gave him a short kiss, petting his hair before looking into his eyes while expecting an answer; still feeling his hand holding your leg up when he pressed his pelvis against your clothed cunt, making you feel what he had been hiding "i want to have sex with you"

"that's really straightforward, don't you think?" but you were joking, you did not gave a single fuck if it was too straightforward or not, you would've gave in ten minutes ago if he asked you.

"you don't want to?" the way he asked you made your pussy throbb, he looked and sounded so offended that it was almost laughable but you just found it hot.

"i didn't say that but-"

"then why are we wasting time?" he interrupted, letting your leg go and quickly petting your hair, softly going down until his fingers grazed your cheek and then moved to your lips, playing with the bottom one for a bit before continuing saying "donghyun will not be out forever"

and so you understood what he meant right away, taking his face between your hands to kiss him again, this time you were the one walking and making him back up until the back of his knees hit the bed and he fell there. there was a fraction of second in the one you both looked at each other and it was so hot that you could only get in top of him and keep making out.

your hands held his face and your lips moved furiously against his, your hips starting to grind on his boner and him softly moaning into the kiss when he felt the friction, automatically buckling his hips up to meet your core.

it only got worse when you started to move faster and harder, wanting to feel as much as you could because his dick felt so good between your wet clothed folds that you just couldn't help it. your eyes were closed during the kiss but when his hands held your hips and started to make pressure there you had to break the kiss to moan pleasantly, your mind so cloudy and your breath speeding up while you looked him in the eyes.

he looked so cute, his eyes watery and his cheeks flushed, the hair slowly starting to stick to his forehead due to the sweat. your hands moved to his chest and you thought you'll go crazy when sanghyeok's hands went below your skirt and held your ass instead, harshly pressing on the skin and pressing his eyes closed when his hips got sloppy.

"i like this, it's really nice" you heard him say in an airy voice, feeling how his heart pace increased with every movement he made. "you feel so good"

but you couldn't really answer anything because you felt so ashamed right now, your own eyes watery and your legs shaking while the movement of your hips didn't stop.

it felt so good though, and you couldn't understand why, you were not a virgin, this was not the first time you humped with some dude but why did it made you feel so overwhelmed? the way your eyes couldn't stop seeing his face, the way his mouth moved, the way his moans sounded, it all should've gave you the idea.

you liked him.

the thought slipped out your head though when you felt your body switch positions, riwoo being in top of you now and holding your stare as he has never been able to do so before. his hands held the back of your thighs and soon he was pressing against your wet panties again but this time he actually did it very slowly, almost painful due to the necessity you were feeling.

"can i-" he started but his voice broke mid sentence as he kept moving against your pussy, he just couldn't stop, it's like he was possessed. "can i fuck you, please? just this time, if you don't like it we can-"

"please do" was all you let out, your hands holding his own hands to ensure that you were positive about this. "i would love to"

sanghyeok was a simple man, and a prepared one too, because the second you said yes he was already reaching for the drawer next to his bed and pulling out a condom that he struggled to open.

you took it and opened it for him, he took the chance to lower his pants instead and move your panties aside while his stare was fixed in your eyes, looking for any signs of discomfort in case he had to retract. he moved forward as he saw none and just licked his middle and anular finger before pushing them pass your wet folds, up and down your pussy before actually entering them in your warm hole.

he was amazed with the way your cunt sucked his fingers, so warm, so wet, so perfect. so when you handed over the condom already opened, he didn't waste time to put it on and instantly align his cock with your entrance.

"can i?" you nodded and he was pushing through right away, doing it slowly in case he had to stop, he just didn't want to hurt you. "all good?"

"you can go on, i'll let you know if anything"

and that gave him the green light he was looking for, slamming his hips against yours when he pushed all the way in, feeling your hips twitch but no hearing a word from you so he just did it again, thrusting so hard you could feel his dick brushing your cervix.

that warm feeling around his dick, the wetness, the sounds, and the way you squirmed under his touch made him even harder than he already was. one of his hands holding your waist and the other one going for your left boob and playing with it below your white dress shirt.

his lips soon found their place in your neck, starting to undo the buttons of your shirt so he could have more space to suck and kiss. and you didn't even protest to the hickies he was leaving there because, to be honest, you doubted he even knew those were going to appear later on.

plus, you were too busy thinking about his dick smashing your pussy to say anything. your walls welcoming him so well, you feeling the stretch and the way his thrusts got sloppy.

you could feel his breath accelerating against the skin of your neck, his moans sounding more high pitched and his body weight dropping onto yours, his glasses falling off his face when he finally left the crook of your neck to look at you in the eye.

"are you cumming?" you asked him, your hands holding his against your thighs and seeing him nod. you were not a person with a high libido but the way sanghyeok looked, so cute and innocent yet being able to fuck you so well while sweetly moaning got you going. "i am too"

"i'm really close, y/n, s-so close" he mumbled, barely seeing your face without his glasses. "it feels so good to be inside of you, oh god"

but the moment he kept saying those things with his sweet voice and dreamy eyes, you couldn't hold it back. you wanted to make him cum first but your plan shattered with his cute face and soft eyes while he fucked you good.

it was too much to handle, too much to process.

so you just let yourself go and finally buckled your hips up a little bit to meet his and cum with a soft mewl, your right hand going down to massage your throbbing clit while sanghyeok opened up his eyes after he felt your body shake beneath him.

he really didn't get it until he felt your pussy clench around his dick and saw your legs shaking on each side of his body as he kept fucking you fast enough to keep your orgasm alive for longer than you could take it.

which made you decide that it was time for him to cum, reaching to his shirt with your free hand and pulling him down to kiss his lips. you knew what it did to him. because two could play the game, right?

it didn't take him ten seconds to cum after you started kissing, inevitably letting a broken moan into his mouth when he finished with two harsh thrusts that made your body hitch in the bed.

he cried out during the kiss, cupping your face when he stopped moving his hips and making the kiss deeper, using his tongue right away and you laughing a little bit when you felt him looking for his glasses around your neck without breaking the kiss.

once he found them he left the kiss to put them on and finally pull out, being careful to not spill the condom inside of you and getting off his bed to trash it.

you were already sitting on the edge of his bed when he came back, panties back in place and skirt and shirt perfectly placed. even your hair looked fine, making sanghyeok question if you guys really had sex just a few moments ago.

"that was great, sanghyeok, i-" you mumbled when he sat down besides you on his own bed, making you nervous all of the sudden "i really enjoyed"

"i liked it too... do you think we can... you know... do this again?" but your face made him panic for a second, adding a simple: "if you don't mind, of course"

but that was precisely the problem, you did mind. you were surprised by the way a simple crush became something bigger without you even noticing.

"i don't think we should keep seeing each other like this" honesty was your way to go at this point "it's not you, i just feel like i could catch feelings and i kinda like you so-"

"wait, what?"

"i mean, you don't have to do anything, i was just giving you my reasons and-" you were the one who panicked this time with the tone he used to respond, your nervousness getting worse when he interrupted you again.

"i want to do something about it, though. i kinda like you too"

"you what!?"

"yeah, i liked you since the first day i saw you at school. i thought you were really pretty and then we got to share classes and i got to see you more everyday and see how you acted and... i really like you, actually" he said with a shy smile before adding "i am so sorry i didn't say it before i just thought that maybe you didn't see me that way"

"you are so smart yet so fucking dumb sometimes, you know that, right?"

and both of you just laughed, kissing a little bit more and cuddling in sanghyeok's bed to talk about yourselves, what you liked, what you didn't, your point of view about certain topics and so on.

now imagine the surprise in donghyun's face when he got home and went to sanghyeok's room just to find you both cuddling and pleasantly sleeping in each others arms.

"finally" was all he mumbled before going to his own room.

he was so tired of listening to sanghyeok talking about you that he could only feel happy yet scared. happy because now you guys were together but scared because if sanghyeok was a simp without even dating you... imagine now.

but, oh, well. shit happens, it is what it is.

[kadextra]

q!Forever & q!Bad, comedy and tragedy are two sides of the same coin

(little meta rp analysis & appreciation)

Comedy and tragedy- complimentary concepts when it comes to the dynamic that is these two characters.

Their lore together is truly like a soap opera to me in the way it operates, entertaining in how goofy it is- I laughed so much during interrodate. They had a whole elaborate musical prank war over a stolen gun (which neither of them even had, they’re just too dedicated to the bit.) The first thing they say to each other after q!Forever returns from the nether is “You look terrible!” 💀 and my guy gifted a bloody chainsaw as the flower of the day to q!Bad in purgatory 1 which was happily accepted.

Even when the characters show attraction for each other, it’s usually through some ridiculous romcom thing. q!Forever is in love with q!Bad dressed as pink barbie and thinks photos of her are the best gift a person could ever receive?? 🤨 q!Bad daydreams about q!Forever as a lobster with blonde hair and a six-pack??? brother be projecting him onto larry the lobster from spongebob squarepants dude what is wrong with them 😭 sometimes I wonder how they’re able to do all these bits in improv and take it seriously, it’s impressive

The characters are not normal, their relationship is not normal, it cannot be viewed normally. the ccs know exactly what they’re doing in creating whatever *gestures* this is, and it’s amazing. over the top, cute, played perfectly for comedy

But the characters aren’t just that, you can’t have them without the inverse 🎭 like a punch to the gut after all the sillies, they really know how to do tragedy well.

I very much look forward to whenever they’re at the top of their angst game, bc they both LOVE to make their cubitos suffer. to an insane degree. My god these two can’t go 3 days with their characters experiencing some peace and joyful whimsy, they *must* rp their ocs actively dying, horribly diseased, going crazy

And they go hard with it. I’m very serious when I say multiple times during the lore I’ve had to get up and walk away to calm down because it was too intense. super special shoutout to the q!Forever first happy pills arc stream & October 1st q!Bad psychotic breakdown stream. I’ve never been so shocked as I was watching those live, the stamina to do highly emotional rp like that is actually nuts. some of the most angsty mfs on this server fr (the #1 spot goes to quackity though. hey maybe i’ll make a tierlist)

So when Bad & Forever bring the best of their angst ability into serious rp interactions together that Aren’t comedic…? we are in for a treat. that talk they had right when q!cellbit died to the code, the richas rescue mission, the election, voting arguments, post-ron kidnapping, colorblind test/therapy, flower of the day. many scenes that are seared into my mind, but none is more so than The Happy Pills Proposal. goosebumps whenever I think about it… the scene ever. the way it was framed, the lines they said, how it had tense, chilling buildup before a literal explosion. how are these people capable of doing the most silly things and then turning around to stab us in the heart 50 times

So you bet I’m crossing my fingers for a meeting between @v@ & q!Bad. Forever is absolutely killing the role so far. If q!Bad gets involved I can already taste the glorious angst…. since he has specific traumatic experience in also being possessed, & having killed his possessed friends in another life. he recalled the memory when talking about how to save q!Forever last night. fun! *shaking*

anyways that’s all :D love these characters, I had been wanting to do a little meta appreciation post for a while so I thought why not now ^^

[fatuismooches]

greetings!!! this is the first time i've ever shared my idea to anyone, kind of worry but guess that i have to share it with you because your writings are so good and i love how you execute scenarios and ideas (literally awake all night scrolling through your brainrot 😭😭😭😭)

let me tell you that fragile!reader and dottore is what keeps me awake at night i love them so much, i literally read everything in the tags, the fluff and angst is SOO GOOD NGL.

so, angst/ no comfort (because i love tormenting myself (⁠◠⁠‿⁠・⁠)⁠—⁠☆), fragile!reader and terminal lucidity - somebody suddenly became lively and conscious before their deaths. i see that you have written about fragile!reader whose memories are slowly deteriorating or slowly losing their eyesight. imagine one day, everything just come back...normal, the sudden recollection of memories, vision returned miraculously, no pain, no suffering, as if they were back to the days at Akademiya. they became gleeful, happy, full of live, no longer the gloomy, sick-ridden individual.

Dottore, of course, was surprised at this phenomenal, run more tests and check-ups just to be sure that we are actually healthy because there is no way we actually turn healthy after being sick in centuries. the segments however, especially Zandy, didn't think much about the whole ordeal. you are fine!! you can finally walking and running freely without being on life-support. your turn in health manage to turned them into a bunch of joyful, blue-haired maniacs with giddy, happy smiles on their lips.

we are fine for a few weeks, which also make Dottore himself believe that maybe, maybe his efforts have paid off, maybe our health have been stable, and maybe from now on, he could spend the rest of eternity with his beloved.

then we die (this is so mean i'm so sorry 😭😭😭😭😭). how they perish is completely up you but i'd preferably that they die in their sleep, a peaceful death. Dottore and the segments are... well, shocked is an understatement, their whole world have...gone, they'd question themself: how can this happen? you were fine in the past few weeks? In which Dottore blame himself the most, he shouldn't have believed that we were fine, he should have run more test, he should have been more cautious about the whole situation but now he completely felt... helpless, for the first time in millions of years. the only person who went thick and thin, the person that can tolerate him in the Akademiya days and the person that he can tolerate now have passed away.

(the ending is kind if short because idk what else to say since my vocabulary and grammar is rather limited. i hope this would be sufficient 😭😭😭😭😭 also looking forward on how you react to this. for now i'll just cry myself to sleep with this scenario while waiting for your work ❤️🥰)

- 🪷

It would come out of nowhere, no one expected it, no one believed it in the beginning. After all, over four hundred years of debilitating illness makes it hard for anyone to believe something good finally happened. But it does, when you first wake up you can feel that something is different - you definitely do some test runs in your room, picking up objects that were once too heavy for you, simple actions that no longer left you tired, no more aches or pains, it was marvelous. So obviously with your newfound energy, you sprint out to find anyone, hell even a random agent would do, because you're finally free. (You can already hear the voices of the segments - no running in the lab because of the very obvious dangers.)

Naturally, Dottore is very skeptical of this, yes, he does not trust how his heart beats at the sight of your glowing self putting on a little performance for him to show how healthy you are now, he can't bring himself to. He's witnessed how low you could become from the worst stages of your sickness, so although he's more than happy to see you well, the possibility of you falling back into such a state is very high. However he cannot find anything, and you don't show any visible signs either. Even so, he still watches you very closely. It's a feeling that always nags, one that may always nag him perhaps, the thought of you becoming worse. But he's not going to damper your mood with his thoughts, you should enjoy this.

Dottore and the segments would still scold you for your recklessness but realize that you are no longer sick and frail and they no longer have to fuss over your health. It's a very strange sensation that's hard to break out of since they've been doing it for so long. But it's good! You're happy! You're strong! You're the [Name] that was buried away, come to rise to the surface once more. Let's just say Zandy very much enjoys the piggyback rides. The checkups still persist as a general measure, but they always go smoothly. It seems there's nothing to worry about.

You would want to assume your role of his assistant once again right away - it's something you've been longing for, to be able to be useful to your lover just like how you once were. To live those days of banter and sharing fascinating knowledge and listening to each other's ideas once more. And so you do, Dottore's more than happy to let you, oh how he's missed you by his side so often. He's excited, he's ready to put the past four hundred years behind and move on, his mind already racing with the countless possibilities that have opened up now. Unfortunately, they don't come to fruition.

Perhaps you felt something wasn't right but it was already far too late - on the day of your death you acted like everything was normal, carrying out your new duties, but also with a lot of added affection, visiting each segment and Dottore and kissing them with all your love. They don't think much of it, you're usually affectionate like that. If only they knew that would be the last time they were embraced by you. Little Zandy too - it would be the last time you ever hugged him and listened to you read him a story. He'd be absolutely inconsolable after your death.

With you gone, the spark in his life would be gone. It would be the same routine of his duties and experiments and research, with nothing to ease his tension. Sure, he no longer has to spend lots of time finding a cure or producing medicine, but this wasn't the way he wanted it to happen. It's the same as when you were sleeping, except this time he no longer has the anticipation of you eventually waking up. Or does he?

Resurrection is a forbidden art, but he is Il Dottore, the one who has no problem sinking his hands into what should not be done, and he is Zandik, the one who loves you. If this world wants you gone so badly, then so be it. He will simply reach for your hand and pull you back to him every time, because even if it is lifeless, he will make sure it's warm once again.

[ophelieverse]

Can you write something angsty for my boy Jace please?🥺

₊˚ˑ༄ؘ My bones are your bones.

Jacaerys Velaryon x fem!reader.

The blacks won the war.After his mother,Jacaerys became king and still,after all these years,he’s haunted by the ghost of his first love.

Also Jacaerys,Y/n and Baela deserved better😭

I’m back with whatever this is!Please be gentle with me and thank you so much for all the love y’all gave me!💕🫶🏻

Sorry for the errors and let me know what you think!🥰

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

The sound of the rain is delightful.

It beats on the roofs,it ticks on the windows,falls from the downhill streets and huddled people to find a shelter together. Sometimes,tired and melancholy it gets trapped inside a pit and falls asleep.The sun, then, akes the rain away.Only the scent remains, he sky returns to its usual blue and the joyful birds return to chirp.

That afternoon it smelled of rain on the asphalt,but it wasn't raining,not yet.Even if the sky was already covered with clouds and the wind that was blowing was able to carry the scent of lilies that were blooming in the big garden of the castle.

King Jacaerys Targaryen,first of his name,was in his thirty two years of living and seven years of reign.Many things had changed through the decades,he grew taller,wiser and dutiful embracing his birthright as the ruler of the Seven Kingdoms.After a bloody and destructive civil war between his family members,between ashes and bones,dragons and brothers,his mother reign was short and not very welcomed by the people.

Jacaerys was like a breath of fresh air,a young and smart man that,since the beginning,knew what he had to do.In his seventh year of reign,he didn’t only changed his last name,like his grandfather requested before his death,but after the war he was a completely different person.

Even rain,the sound and the smell of it,the feeling on the bare skin and the waiting to see it falling for the grey sky was different for him now.

Rain became much more than just water falling from the sky.It is a very underestimated element of nature,whenever it started to rain the world changed.It was raining the first time he kissed her and it was raining the day she died.

For Jacaerys,rain was a similarity of sadness.The sky changes to accommodate the bad mood and then it starts to rain slowly,a heartbreaking slowness that leads him to think as he look at it from behind the window.Exactly like pain,which hugged him slowly and then invaded him completely,soaking his soul.

But the worst rain is the one that comes suddenly,unexpectedly,when he was around and it starts to rain suddenly and he didn’t know how to protect himself from it so he could start running desperately to find shelter.Equal to the pain that hits him straight to the heart like a bolt of lightning in the blue,he couldn’t expect it,he was not prepared for this kind of pain so it spreads in him sucking in every hope of being able to smile in the rain

Everything gets darker,the rain murmurs it’s sad music in his ears and he no longer distinguishes the various scents that usually hover in the streets.The rain covers everything, it covers the noises,the scents and also covers himself.

The dropps of water are short-lived,who knows if in the stretch they make from the sky to the asphalt they are sad because they know that in a few moments they will disappear or if they decide to be happy for their last moments of life.

Whether it comes slow or comes suddenly,rain is always dangerous but never as much as pain. Because the rain ends and then the sun returns but the pain continues because it got under his skin.He could wash his soaked clothes and then he put them to dry and it's like they've never been wet,but he will keep feeling the pain constantly and he’ll like to tear his skin.

The rain in Jacaerys life was sadness,but from the rain he could always find a shelter,from the pain he couldn’t protect himself.

During that time of the day,late evening,an ancient sadness came up from inside him and he knew he didn't have to let her get where it really started to hurt.In the place inside himself where she was still alive,breathing and dancing with his deepest dreams,hopes and fears.

When Jacaerys became King he was only twenty five years old and,for a moment,he was getting better.For a moment he felt good.For a moment he wanted to live.For a moment he had hope again.And in a moment,when he got back at her house,in the gardens and near the lake,he had lost everything again.

He had gone back,the day after his coronation,and everything seemed to have remained the same.The bright light of the sun hitting on the windows,the sweet smell of spring in the air,the crystalline water.It was like in the past,the time he had fallen for her.

He could see some of the roses still blooming in the garden.Brown on the edges and bright in other colors,their petals drooping downward, dying just as their lives have begun.

They stayed past their time,and Jacaerys realized that she have too.Y/n presence was everywhere and it took his breath away,in a second it all came back.

He liked to think that everything was going better,that he was alright and had a new life with a new love in it.But he was wrong.What lived and died between them was still haunting him.

«You promised to protect her!»her father had screamed to him,pure anger on his old face but in his eyes the empty feeling of the pain of having lost his daughter.

«She is gone because of you!»her older sister had sobbed,holding a hand close to her chest.

Death its terrible.So terrible to lose someone.And if he didn't face it,if he didn't deal with it,then he’ll just end up losing himself too.But Jacaerys didn't want to heal.He didn’t wanted to let go,because the pain was the only connection to what he had lost.

When we lose someone to whom we gave all the love we had inside ourselves,at that moment everything stops.We may have a lot of other people around,of course, but in our eyes they will be invisible.We are convinced that nothing will make sense anymore,that nothing will ever be the way it was before.Together with that person we also lose ourselves a bit, denying ourselves the chance to move on.We darken more and more,shrouded in the shadow of our loneliness,forgetting that everything that is not watered,sooner or later withers.

For a moment,Jacaerys closed his eyes.In his mind he was still fifteen,together and in love with her.He liked to believe that they have never been apart,so that he could invent a new past to remember.He could imagine how things would’ve been different if she had been with him.

He imagined what life could’ve been if that day he had decided to take her with him at Dragonstone instead of leaving her behind at Oldtwon.A tiny voice in his head liked to tell him that he did it to keep her safe,once the war started and he was called back to fight.Another part of him,the one that kept him awake at night,tormented him with the heart wrenching feelings that it was his fault.

Y/n death was his fault.

«I’m sorry it ended this way.»was the only thing he could breathe out.

Her younger sister was a Septa,closer to the gods that Jacaerys had stopped to believe in,and the only one that accepted his presence at Y/n memorial near the lake where her body was found.

«Y/n has been dead long before she died.»her sister stated,her grey vest blowing in the chilly wind and her voice soft«The time she had spent with you was the most happy I’ve ever seen her.She was alive for the first time.»she confessed,her bright eyes locked on the cold stone on the green grass.

Jacaerys fell on his knees near where little violets were blooming,his vision was blurry with the tears that were streaming down his cheeks and he almost didn’t noticed the words written on her grave:

“My bones are your bones.”

Jacaerys choked a cry,remembering the poem that they had read together as he whispered«When my time is near,i will be burned with you.So i had desired my dusts to be mingled with yours.Forever and forever,to be able to lay with you.»he prayed.

«Your grace-»her younger sister was trying to comfort him,but he didn’t heard her.

«I had never loved anyone,anything in the way i loved her.»he sobbed,his heart was hurting so much that he wanted to rip it out from his chest with his bare hands«I would never love someone else like this.I can’t.It only happens once.»his hands were trembling as he traced his fingers on the stone pretending it was her face.

Her sister placed a comforting hand on his shoulder,her eyes wet fro the tears and a sad little smile on her lips«For some people not even once.Y/n was very lucky to be loved by you.»she whispered«Your love made her immortal.»as she looked around,from the birds chirping,the blooming flowers,with the awaking of the spring her sister was there.

Jacaerys shook his head,his brain was pounding against his skull,the air was like fire in his lungs«She is gone because of me.»he cried her older sister words.

«Your grace,it wasn’t your fault.My-»the young Septa tried,holding back a the urge to cry with a sad and apprensive smile.

The king choked a sob«You can put the blame on me.I already blame myself.»his eyes burned,his breathe was short«She was there,all alone,and she shouldn’t have.She should have been with me!»the skin on his face was itching,he wanted to take it apart,feel physical pain to numb the one in his soul.

He didn’t wanted her to be immortal if she wasn’t there with him.It was selfish,to dream of having her just for himself and so painful to have loved something that death had touched so easily.

«The gods have reasons-»her younger sister calm voice was interrupted harshly by his.

«What reasons?»Jacaerys almost shouted,turning his head up to look at her«If the gods are so merciful,what was the reason?Why couldn’t they just took some else?Why my Y/n?»he asked as she knew the right answer.

Her younger sister,now that he looked at her better,had the same eyes of his Y/n.But hers were brighter,warmer and full of life.Y/n ones,the last time he saw them up close,were white like sea pearls,cold and empty,dead just like the rest of her.

Her sister knelt besides him,a gentle hand on his shaking back gave him a warm familiar feeling«When we were children,my mother used to scold Y/n because she always preferred to pick the flowers that my mother had just planted»the young girl told him,giggling at the old memory«She said she liked them most because they bloomed with the first day of the spring,they were untouched and they were the most beautiful in the gardens.»she continued with a little voice.

«She loved to paint them.»Jacaerys murmured,closing his eyes for a second.

Her sister nodded«I think the Gods picked my sister for the same reasons.She was the most beautiful flower.»she then said,looking up at the sky.

The clouds were darkening,the chilly wind was starting to blow stronger.It was about to rain again.

«Then why?»he asked again«Why did they made us met and fall in love,if they had to pick her?»he couldn’t understand,this was definitely a punishment for his family sins.

Her sister shook her head«All that i know is that intense love always lead to mourning.»she whispered.

Legend has it that there is always a reason why souls meet.Maybe they found each other for reasons that weren't all that different.They were two souls who sought and found comfort in each other and it is not possible to separate. The reasons why they are united are not incidents.Maybe Y/n needed someone to show her how to live and Jacaerys needed someone to show him how to love.

Memory was an agony,but he remembered everything about the first time he had laid his eyes on her.All the things they did together and even though sometimes he wished he had never met her to spare his heart from this pain,he would’ve been lying to himself if he didn’t wish to do it all again and again just to be with her.

Jacaerys was fifteen,betrothed to his cousin Baela,one of the most beautiful girls he had ever seen,fearless and bold.She would’ve made a good Queen one day,ruling by his side with a good heart and an open mind.Even though he was promised to her,Jacaerys had never wondered if he was capable of it,of loving someone romantically.

He had always thought that,for him,a prince that life was already planned by his parents for him,love would remain a utopia,that he would never be able to fall in love with a woman and he did not believe that he would ever have the chance to bond with a girl,not enough to love her.He thought he wouldn't even be able to recognize love.

Then,Y/n had arrived and it was her that he had recognized.Love was not a word.Love was her silhouette.Her height that paraded away from him and reached him on the other side of the corridor and then became her hair and the contours of the light that caressed them.Love was her eyes looking for his mouth and her teeth biting his lips;it was her voice greeting him distracted,while in her throat she still heard my saliva.

The love for Jacaerys was his Lady Y/n and thousands had died because of it.

In the Long Summer of his fifteen years,young prince Jacaerys flew on the back of his dragon,Vermax,from Dragonstone to Oldtown.As the future King,he already had duties and responsibility on his shoulders,one of them was to know and embrace his Valyrian roots.He had heard the whispers,seen himself and his two younger brothers to know the truth that everyone was afraid to talk about.

His mother,Rhaenyra,suggested it would be a good idea for him to study in Oldtown where history and philosophy met daily,where all of his ancestors had learned and whose presences still lingered in the streets.

Lord Penrose house was one of the most beautiful in the Citadel,with ancient paintings,beautiful gardens,big libraries full of histories and the most beautiful thing the prince ever saw in his life.Lord Penrose house was a place were young Lords and Ladies from all the Seven Kingdoms stayed whenever they where in the city to study,but among all the people that crowded the big place,his young daughter,Y/n,was the only one that glowed.

A light green dress hugged her body,clinging to her wet skin,as she emerged from the warm water of the lake in the middle of the central garden.Roses,daffodils and daisies were the most beautiful frame for the most beautiful painting, “The birth of a nymph”he would’ve called it and in that moment Jacaerys wished he was gifted with the capability of painting,to capture that instant forever.Carving it in his mind,heart and soul.

She was one of those beauties he couldn’t forget,because she screams like an earthquake, or a thunderstorm in her impetuous force.She had the charm of an unpredictable destiny.And he had lost his heart.

Jacaerys was frozen,his dark eyes became big as two cups of tea,his cheeks redden as his gaze trailed on her small figure and on the exposed glistening skin.He had never believed in the gods,ora in any other form of deity,but right now he was more than willing to go down on his knees for just a taste of her.

«Are you in need of any assistance,my Lady?»the young prince just noticed the way the hem of her dress got stuck in the branches of the bush near the lake.

The girl didn’t looked at him,her wet hair were clinging to the skin of her neck and falling down her beautiful face«No,thank you.»she groaned as she tried to free herself and not reap the dress at the same time.

Jacaerys smiled at the sound of her voice,gorgeous just like her and only now he noticed that she was holding,in her left hand,two brushes«Are you sure?You seems like you could use some help.»he said with kindness and a bright smile.

Y/n huffed annoyed by the situation«I may be a damsel,but i’m not the distressed kind»she spit out«I don’t need your-»her voice stopped when she lifted her face to look at who she was talking to.

Jacaerys lowered his torso,leaned forward and with a gesture of his wrist broke the twig,then threw it in the middle of the lake.The girl immediately took steps back,surprised by the presence in front of her.She didn't know how to behave,she didn't know whether to thank him or pretend nothing happened.The focus fell on his stature,he was much taller than her and his shoulders could have lifted a trunk from how thick and wide they were.Immediately afterwards she lingered on his eyes,slightly closed for the first rays of the sun.She remained hypnotized by his eyes.Brown,dark.

And a normal person couldn’t add all the adjectives and facets of that color,but for someone like her it wasn’t just brown.Static, firm,her mind was motionless.She almost couldn't see the bottom of those eyes.

Brown and bold,yet rich and deep stood those eyes.

«Here»he said gently,offering his hand to here«Are you alright,my lady?»he asked then,with a worried tone.

Y/n nodded slowly,instead of accepting his hand she used her free one to lift her dress to walk out the water of the lake«Actually,there is something you could help me with my prince.»she said with a calmer voice.

Jacaerys smiled immediately«Of course»he said,«But first can i know your name?»he asked as he walked after her.

«I’m Y/n.»she informed him,barefoot and her dress wetting the floors of the porches«And you are princess Rhaenyra son»she continued.

He nodded«Indeed I’am.»

Jacaerys had visited the big as soon as he had arrived in the morning,Lord Penrose offered him a nutritious breakfast,a tour of the place as he introduced to the young prince all the brightest Lords and Ladies that were studying,but nothing of them could’ve compared with what he was seeing right now.

In a small room,away from the big art studio in her house,there was different canvases,canes of paint and dirty brushes.Y/n placed the brushes she had in her hand on a wooden table were they scattered some pencils and papers.

But what had caught his eyes was the painting right next to him.It was drew directly on the white - stoned wall,not on a canvas and it was not framed,but free on the bricks.

From the windows across the room the rays of the sun illuminated the work of art in all it full glory.A masterpiece it was,from the accurate paint brushes,the fluid technique,the colors that were chosen.It definitely showed that whoever paint it was an amazing artist with years of practice and love and devotion.

On the wall it was represented Gael Targaryen death,the thirteenth and last child of King Jaehaerys and Queen Alysanne.After the deaths of her parents,it was revealed that Gael had been seduced and impregnated by a traveling singer.She had given birth to a stillborn son,and overwhelmed by her grief,she had walked into Blackwater Bay and drowned.

Jacaerys stared at the painting,his ancestors,the young and frail princess was the center of the artwork.She is floating in a body of water.Her head is situated to the left of the composition,and her feet face towards the right-hand side.She is depicted in a beautiful,soft dress barely keeping her buoyant and her midsection is submerged in the water.

Her face is still out of the water,and he could see she had an almost listless expression;her eyes are staring out ahead and her mouth is slightly parted.She appears almost unaware of the fact that she is drowning.There is a necklace of purple violets around her neck and a small pink rosebud on its stem near her right ear.One of Gael hands is floating just above the water,her palm is facing up and her hand appear cupped,the other one is clinging to her empty and cold belly where once a life was supposed to be.

«Which one are you?»the girl asked suddenly,she was using one of the covers that were sitting on a chair next the window to dry her hair.

Jacaerys turned around confused«Uh?»he sounded lost.

Y/n giggled at his expression«I think one the princes is named Joffrey»she started,closing her eyes for a moment to remember better«The other one is Lucas or…no…i think his name is Lucien.»she murmured.

«It’s actually Lucerys and he’s my brother»he corrected her with a soft smile.

«I was close.»she sounded proud of herself and it made him smile even more.

«You were.»he reassured her.

«And you?»she asked.

«I’m Jacaerys.»he introduced himself.

Y/n stayed quiet for a second«Why are you here Jacaerys?»it was the first time someone asked him why he wanted to go to Oldtown.

The prince swallowed,licking his dry lips«I’m here to study,my Lady.»he informed her,standing still on his feet.

She pursed her lips,trailing her eyes on his regal figure«That’s what you told my father and perhaps what you told your mother.»she was reading him like a book without much effort«But why are you really here?»she asked again.

Her eyes were on him and for the first time in his life he felt seen.Something warm was spreading in his chest,his hands were sweaty as he looked at her coming closer to him.Her dress was still wet,hugging her perfect silhouette,as she walked past him.

«Why were you in the lake?»Jacaerys asked a question instead of answering hers.

Y/n was holding an annoyed expression but a little smile was forming on her face«I had thrown my brushes in it.»she explained.

The young boy looked even more confused now,walking around covered canvas with white sheets and empty easels«And,forgive me for asking,why would you do that?»he said with a chuckle.

«I will answer your question when you will answer mine.»she stated with a playful expression on her sun kissed face.

Jacaerys looked again at the painting on the wall,the purple eyes and silver hair that he never had and still,after all these years,were haunting him every time he looked at himself.The whispers,the nasty glances,the harsh words and his mother reassurances did everything and nothing at the same time to carve on him his true identity.

«I want to be part of something.»he immediately said,after taking a deep breathe.

His mother always told him that,not matter what,he was and always will be a Targaryen.He had a dragon that followed his orders and he was the heir of the Iron Throne.Yet whenever he looked at his family members he felt like an outsider,like he was admiring a beautiful painting from afar.If he knew something more about his family,maybe he could feel part of it.

Y/n sounded content with his answer but she didn’t added anything«I threw my brushes in the lake because my father wants me to marry Ser Gwayne Hightower.»she said suddenly.

Jacaerys cringed at the sound of his name«I can assume that it’s not what you wanted.»

The girl let out a frustrated sound,crossing her arms on her chest«All i want to do is to paint.»she murmured,looking around her small art studio.

«You can still paint after you get married.»Jacaerys stated with nonchalant advice.

«My father fell in love with my mother after he saw her paint in the streets of the Citadel.She was the most talented artist,but after their marriage she had never touched a brush again.»Y/n explained with a distant melancholy.

«We are not our parents.»Jacaerys started with a solid voice and a comforting expression«We can change and still decide what to be and what to do.Even if it’s all already planned for us.»he needed to hear these words as much as her.

«Don’t do that.»Y/n shook her head with a small smile.

Jacaerys smiled with her«Do what?»he asked.

«Make me become a optimist.»she answered«You will ruin my life and i didn’t invite you here for this.»she continued picking up the paint and the brushes that she needed for her next work.

«Why did you invited me here for?»he raised a brown.

As he looked at her,he realized that in a very short time that was a special feeling when he was with her,and he wished that wonder would remain in his life forever.

«I want you to pose for me.»she answered.

After a year in her house,that sensation grew stronger and Y/n was the one that showed him the city,Oldtown,in all its beauty.She was at his bedroom door one morning,a dark cloak in her left hand and a pile of commoners dirty clothes in the other.She was dressed as a boy,light brown pants that were too big for her and a maroon shirt.

«You have to be one with the city to enjoy it at it fullest.»she had told him,shoving the dirty clothes in his hands.

Something told Jacaerys that she was used to sneak out in disguised,to loose herself in the crowd and to be just like everyone else around.

«There is no other place like this in the world,my prince.»Y/n was walking beside him,the first lights in the morning and the ancient architecture framing them.«Sometimes walking in silence,I feel like I'm listening to the voices of those who filled these streets before me.Lives after lives,after other lives,for centuries,and I know that even King’s Landing and Dragonstone are made of centuries of history and people,but you can't recognize every moment of that story overlapping like this,one on the other.»she sounded so in love with the place she was born and grew up with,her eyes scanning every place that learned by heart in the years.

«I’ve never seen something so breathtaking.»Jacaerys confessed,but his eyes weren’t looking,weren’t taking in what the Lady next to him was talking about,they were fixed on the way her lips moved.

«Me neither,no matter how many times i walk here.»she admitted.

«Can i…will i be able to look at if forever?»he didn’t know what he was asking for,but he had to ask.

Maybe he was asking her to be always by his side,to always have something beautiful to look at.

Y/n nodded«Oldtown does not lose its pride,its sincerity,its sarcasm and the uncontrollable cynicism with which for centuries it has watched generations of the world fall in love with it,without ever breaking down.Breathe in Oldtown,Jacaerys,tomorrow it will already be different,tomorrow there will also be your smell,in a hundred years they will still feel it,here nothing is lost.»she reassured him with a gentle smile.

«We will be here forever?»Jacerys said,stood in the middle of the square,people all around them laughing and talking,different shades of colors and tunes of musics.

«We will be here forever.»Y/n repeated with a sincere and strong affirmation«Even when our bones will become ashes and our souls will leave this earth,you will always found us here.»then she took his hand,her fingers latching on his,their skins caressing each other,a silent promise as she started to walk again with him.

In the time they had spent together,Jacaerys had learned that one of Y/n older brothers became a Maester for the Citadel,her older sister was married to Lord Manderly son and was expecting their fourth child,her younger sister was studying to become a Septa and her younger brother was training to be a knight in the capital.

After the first kiss that they shared together,she opened up more to him«They already knew what they wanted,what to be in this big world.»Y/n said to him.

«And you?»Jacaerys asked her one evening.

They were walking slowly in the city streets,a cloak on their shoulders as she showed him all the beauty that history can offer them.Immortals and young at the same time.

«Me?»her sweet voice was surprised,her nose scrunching up in confusion.

«Yes.»he said quietly«What is it that you want?»he asked this time,keeping his gaze on her silhouette.

She seemed to think about,maybe a second or two,no one has aver asked her what she wanted «I want to live near the ocean,in a beautiful house with big windows so that i can watch the water.»she started with a dreamy look in her beautiful eyes«Oh and i also want a room,a small one,just for me where i can paint.»she continued with a small smile on her lips.

Jacaerys heart soared in his chest,a bright smirk on his face was burning his cheeks«Anything else?»he chuckled.

She nodded immediately«I also want you to take me fly on your dragon,»her small face heated up«to see the rest of the world with you.»she added.

«Thats what you want?»his heart was beating loudly in his ear,he almost couldn’t heard her.

But then she smiled brightly,like she was shy«Yes»she nodded again«Would you do it for me?»she asked with a tiny voice.

He pulled her to himself in the dark,under a building,an arch,a slit of the world,pushed her against the wall and kissed her.And if he had gone crazy,to kiss her under the eyes of so many people,she would let him do it and she would have been crazy the same way,or even more,if he had asked her.

«Sometimes,Y/n,»Jacaerys whispered on her lips,behind him the Temple of the Seven stood in all it magnificent«I get doubts about the existence of the Gods.»he confessed to her.

«What?»she murmured confused,opening her eyes to look at how beautiful he was so close to her.

«Shh,»he said,his hand holding her face and thumb against her delicate mouth,«I have doubts about the existence of the Gods.Then I look at you and think that the Gods,even just one of them,must necessarily exist,because Nature cannot be so diabolical to create something so beautiful and prohibit it.»He approached,squinted his thumb on her half-closed lips,and spoke in her ear in a hoarse voice that made her tremble«Nothing is like you and there is nothing that i wouldn’t do to make you happy.You want to see the world?I’ll buy it for you,i’ll give you every centimeters of this earth,every drop of water,all the clouds in the sky.»And it was almost a lament.

«Would you do it for me?»she asked again,she was breathless,cheeks red and hair messy but she was the most beautiful thing in the whole city.

Jacaerys nodded his head slowly«But i will only ask you something in return.»he breathed out,holding himself up with a hand on the wall near her head.

«What is it that you want?»Y/n nose brushed against his,her breath tickling his neck.

«You.»he said immediately«I want you to be my wife,i want you to be mine as i’m yours and even after our deaths our love can still remain right here where we stood.»his lips were on hers again,a way to keep this promise and to be forever tangled with her.

No matter how many squares there would be later,how many statues,staircases,temples, paintings or extraordinary palaces would await them at the end of that darkness,that smile of her as she pronounced a small«I do.»would always be a blasphemy screamed in the face of the Gods,or art,and nothing could ever be more beautiful.Oldtown was just a worthy frame.

Jacaerys never smiled again after that day.That’s was everyone said about him,a joyless man,severely marked by his experiences during the civil war that changed his life forever.The King could be graceful and courtly when it was required,but at the same time had a darkness within him that never went away.The guilt he felt over having abandoned and lost Y/n kept him awake every night.He had known love and it had broken his heart.

Even after years,when everyone moved on,how could he think of looking at and recognizing the same world as before,after loving in that way?How could he imagine going back to living any life after that,after Y/n? How could he think he was the same person?She had changed his name and stole his soul.There was nothing of him without her.

Jacaerys knew it wasn’t fair,not just for them,he had promised and dreamed a life with her but it also wasn’t fair for his wife,Baela,that was caught in the crossfire of a dying love that could never be replaced.

Jacaerys was a good King and a even better father for his five children,but he wasn’t a good husband.He tried his best,but that evening,the day before his thirty three Name Day,the Gods were indeed punishing for letting the day of his birth to also be the day he lost his love,he had spoken to his wife for the first time in the entire week.

Baela was wearing a beautiful dark red dress with golden embroiderers on,her curly hair were tied up on her head with the purest gems between them.She looked beautiful,the most beautiful woman in the Seven Kingdoms.

«What are you doing?»Jacaerys voice sounded distant,it made her flinch,stopping her hand before she could reach the handle to open the door.

«I was looking for you.»she stated,composing herself and taking a deep breath.

Baela stood right in front the door where Jacaerys kept hidden,on the inside,what his heart desired the most,something that he wouldn’t share with the rest of the world ever again so that no one could take her away from him again.

«I told you to not come in here.»his face was made of stone,always so serious and dark as he spoke lowly.

Baela nodded,never loosing her pride«I wanted to discuss the plans for your Name Day,before it is too late.»she cleared her throat and held her chin up.

«Not today,to now.»he simply answered.

«You always say this.»her tone was sharp,like her gaze on his taller and broader frame.

«And you never listen!»Jacaerys voice came out harsh,he closed his eyes for a moment when he saw her painful expression.

«Why would I?You never talk to me or even look in my direction if you aren’t forced to do so!»Baela accused him,it was the truth though,he couldn’t bare any of this.

Jacaerys let out a deep sigh«Just take the children to do whatever they want,let Laenor decide.I will join you later in the day.»he simply stated,moving across the room.

«Later in the day?»Baela scoffed,a sour laugh on her lips«She will still be dead tomorrow and the day after and for all the years to come,your children are here and alive and yet you rather spend your time in this tomb than with us!»her anger lashed out,but the silence her harsh words were met with hurt more.

Jacaerys had fire in his eyes.Baela didn't even think he knew how to scream and from that moment on she didn't understand anything.It seemed to her that she was no longer present: she was a spectator of the consequences of her stupidity and her profound naivety.Baela felt his hand squeeze her arm and drag her first along the the hallway,out of the room,and, then, across the lawn.She had always considered him calm,quiet,collected,he was yes taller,but she never thought he had so much strength.His gaze burned,he was out of his mind,yet his body remained calm,of an indefinite and chilling composure.

Hours later,as her husband locked himself in that one room,Baela was sitting in one of the terraces of the Red Keep,sipping some hot tea and looking at the beautiful city below her eyes. She was supposed to be a mask of frustration,humiliation and disappointment. Everything that had happened that afternoon went back and was rewritten,with the new eyes of deception and anger.Because it was what she felt and he understood it and repeated it:

«Not today,not now.» almost like a prayer.

«Hypocrite!Go to the seven hells,Jace!»she screamed as he walked away.Without voice, without strength,without momentum.Almost out of politeness.But he didn’t came back.

«Has he told you anything?»Rhaena asked with a small voice,sitting right across from her and a pitiful expression on her beautiful face.

«Jace never talks about her or the time he had spent at Oldtown.He never talks about anything.»Baela had whispered to her twin sister.

Rhaena gave her a sad smile,squeezing her sister hand«Maybe,one day,he’ll come around.You just have to give him some time.»she tried to reassured her.

«It’s been years and still he loves a dead girl more than he will ever love me.»Baela murmured,she felt bad for thinking these sort of things but seeing her husband,the man that she had always wanted so devoted to a girl that wasn’t there anymore made her heart crumble.

«You have to understand him.»Rhaena started,taking a deep breath«He wasn’t there to protect her and she died without giving him the chance to say goodbye.If i had lost Lucerys in the same way,i don’t know if i would be able to stay alive.»she confessed with a quivering voice and looking down.

Baela stayed quiet,swallowing the hard lump in her throat.She still remembered the night of her wedding,how happy she was when she first saw Jacaerys waiting for her at the altar in the Temple in the city,every girl in the Seven Kingdoms wished to have him but he was hers by the laws of the gods.Then,that same night,after he drunk all the wine he could’ve found,he went on top of her,did what he could and whispered in her ear a name:

«Y/n,my love.»

It was the first time that Baela heard it,the only time that he spoke about her,before closing himself in his private chambers.

Baela was a living woman,his wife,the Queen and the mother of his children.Y/n was a dead girl,a corpse that,just like the Targaryen House tradition,was burned by the fire of his dragon during her funeral.And yet Jacaerys was still completely in love with her.

Baela hated her,his love,his Lady Y/n.She hated her,a girl that she never met and never will,with all the pain she had suffocated in the last years of their marriage,because it was her, because it was him,for all that they meant to each other.Because Y/n represented what Baela wanted to be and she enjoyed the one thing she wanted to have:Jacaerys’love.

She didn’t knew anything about this girl,only a name that her husband whispered like oxygen.Baela also knew that they met in Oldtown when Jacaerys went to study,when she had begged him to take her with him,she often wondered if things would’ve changed of went differently if she went with him,if during that summer,during that three years he had fallen for her,his betrothed,instead that with another girl.

In the long summer of so many moons ago,when Y/n was just a young girl that hated to be called a Lady even though her voice,just like the princesses of the fairytales,breathed roses and Jacaerys knew nothing about love and was certain of not many things in his life,they met for the first time under the sweet dark trees and with the perfume of peaches and honey in the air.

Y/n was everything a girl of her age,of her social status was not supposed to be:loud,inconvenient,wild and with always something to say.She had always been as fragile as porcelain but inside herself she cherished something strong and indestructible. Inside her heart she lived on the sadness that over time had turned into art.

And now that she was gone,she was like the paintings Jacaerys detached from the walls of his room after she left.She stayed like the rectangular marks left on the walls.

Now he looked at her image like he did every day,at the same hour,from the same spot,letting his dark eyes memorize every piece,very small detail that he so meticulously had engraved in his brain,in his heart.

Over the long and painful years,Jacaerys would often dream of her.His bright light in an ocean of darkness,whose despair mirrored his own,and whose love brought him a joy he had never felt,and have not felt since.

Years ago,this room was supposed to be her art studio,a reserved place where it was always sunny and bright,where she could watch the ocean,the way the waters shined under the rays of the sun and the waves crashed on the shore.A place where she could’ve taught to their children how to paint,where she wouldn’t have to be the Queen,just herself,just the person that he loved more than anything else in the world.

Instead,it became a tomb for his memory of her.Jacaerys had conserved everything she had gave him,the flowers she used to pick from the gardens,the little silly doodles that she made of them and her ghostly and everlasting presence.He thought that if he painted what haunted him,he could free himself of her forever.In all these years,he had never been more wrong about anything.

She was everywhere,in the air that burned his lungs,in all the salty tears that washed down his face,in the sound of the rain,in the laughter of his children through the corridors,in the flowers in the meadows,in the sun that welcomed him every morning and in the moon that accompanied him to sleep every night.

In his private chambers,in that small and quiet room,away from everyone else eyes and presence,Jacaerys had let in only the best artists,the most talented painters he could had find in the Seven Kingdoms.

It took years,after his coronation and arranged marriage with his cousin Baela,to finally find someone who was able to represent his biggest fear,the only thing that made his heart ache and beat again,that made his blood flow in his veins,his eyes water and his lips trembling with the whisper of a faint name:

«Y/n.»

His Lady Y/n was as beautiful as the day he had lost her,pale and serene.

Her image was painted right on the stone wall,not on a canvas and definitely not restrained by any frame.Jacaerys wanted her to be free by any restrictions and to occupy all the space,every centimeters like she did with his mind and all of his memories.

She was there,so close to him that if he wanted he could reach forward and let his hand,even his fingertips trace briefly the curves of her frame.But he never did,to touch her it would be a sin,a privilege that he had lost and he’s punishing himself for it.

She was there in the middle of a lake,just like when he first laid his eyes on her,when he first met her and felt his heart skip a beat,his mouth dry and palms sweaty.Surrounded by the awestruck swans,a nymph she had been,a real nymph like the ones he used to read in the ancient books,submerging her skin like roses in the crystalline waters.Her hips like a flower shrouded by foam seemed to turn golden,bathed by the light coming through the leaves.Her collarbones like wings spread from the base of her throat to the ends of her shoulders.A bird held down by skin.

She was paler than dead,her eyebrows were smooth and thin and angular like in every antique portrait.Her lips were pursed,her mouth scarlet red and her teeth set close together,her soft eyes were looking right into his,shining with the sweetest melancholy.Her face was turned,up in search for the light like the most precious flower.

Her marvelous poetry,her splendid sensibility her tragic and beautiful mouth made him quiver.Jacaerys was the King,but in front of her,of the beautiful,young and full of life girl that she once was before she had became immortal before his eyes,he was nothing but just the young and naive boy full of love that she once met.

A broken porcelain vase and a now dry,light pink dress,that still smelled like her,was all that remained in that room of the first time they shared a kiss and understood what loving someone meant.

She was love,Y/n was his love.

Jacaerys loved her way of seducing him,a flirtatious look,an indiscreet smile,they wete part of her weapons as a beautiful lady,of which he declared himself defenseless.

These were things he loved in her,he loved her flaws,the nobility of her feelings,her way of seeing life,he loved her optimism and the way she encouraged others,she was a miracle that fate has sent to give him inspiration with a beautiful smile.

Like a beautiful flower that opens its petals to receive the sun's rays after receiving the morning tuft.Like a beautiful flower,the one on a cliff,it resists the weather,drought,rain, strong winds,strengthening one's being,to face day by day,opening the petals to beautify the landscape,always with a beautiful smile.Like a beautiful lotus flower,which,regardless of where it grows,rises with great beauty.This is how his Y/n’s love was,that with her mere presence she give beauty,her journey she begin to sigh to hearts.

Before that day,before kissing her for the first time,Jacaerys have not noticed love.

But for Y/n,he was so easy to fall in love with.He made her feel safe,he made everything feel like an adventure with a hand always on the small of her back to guide her.He laughed at things easily,he was kind,gentle,sweet and thoughtful.He listened to her words and to her silences.

«Come here.»he said to her one day,opening his arms wide,and she went.

«Stay.»he begged her,and she stayed,she wished she could had stayed with forever.

They were in her art studio,it had been months since they met for the first time and since she asked him to pose for him.

Y/n stood there,proud,never in awe and with a beauty so brazen as to intimidate the centuries of literature and art that framed her.Even though her house was a museum,not a single item could’ve compared to her.

«Don’t look at me.»she murmured,even though her eyes were set on the wall she was painting she could still feel his stare on her figure«Keep your chin down and look at the window.»she instructed him.

It was easy for her to say,but it was hard for Jacaerys to do it when the only thing he wanted to look at it was her.Y/n was a few feet from him,her hair were messily tied up her head,but some of them still managed to fell down on her beautiful face.Her body was wrapped in a delicate pink dress,a white apron stained with paint,she was barefoot as always.Nothing out there,outside the windows,was worth looking when she stood there like a little goddess.

Jacaerys was sitting on footstool and he was trying his hardest to remain still and to look where she asked.The marigolds,the daisies,the tulips were so plain,Y/n skin was smoother than any of their petals,her lips plumper and her scent enough to drive him crazy.

«I thought that she was the one naked and chained.»Jacaerys observed as he took a quick glance at was she was painting.

On the wall next the door,it was represented Argella Durrandon and Orys Baratheon.She was the daughter and only child of Argilac the Arrogant,the last Storm King.After her father was killed in Aegon's Conquest,she married Orys Baratheon,the first Lord of Storm's End,founding the new House Baratheon.

They delivered her to Orys,naked and chained. Orys,however,covered her with his cloak and treated her chivalrously,the next day he had married her.

«She is.»Y/n muttered,cleaning one of her brushes to use a different color.

Jacaerys hummed,his cheeks were a little red«He is too.»he noticed.

The two people were naked,their body fluids like they couldn’t feel the heavy chains on their wrists and ankles.Holding each other,trying to cover each other with his cloak,their eyes locked and their lips a centimeter away.

«They are the same,is what love do to us.»Y/n told him,taking a step back to admire her unfinished work.

«My bones are your bones.»Jacaerys whispered,getting up and quoting an old poet that they had read together.

«Where you go i go,what you see i see.»Y/n nodded,continuing it.«Argella was given to him as a slave,but he freed her and made her his wife.Orys was a bastard child,but for her it was the first man that treated her like a person.They were both chained all their lives,they were the same.»she said,her eyes were soft like the sound of her voice.

Equals,on the same level.That what Jacaerys felt when he was with her,understood.Like he was missing a piece and the hole was filled whenever she was near,like he was drowning and she was air.A balance,something safe and comforting.They were the same,Y/n was chained by her father choices and Jacaerys was chained by his mothers.

«If Gwayne Hightower won’t let you paint,he’s a total idiot.»Jacaerys said suddenly,surprising her«Because he will miss how beautifully and uniquely you view the world.»it pained him to smile to her like that.

Y/n eyes widened,her cheeks were rosy as she tried to hide the way her heart was beating.Jacaerys was so much closer now,she could feel his shoulder touching hers,see all the dark shades of his eyes.

«The world is always beautiful,you just have to look at it the right way.»she told him.

Jacaerys shook his head«The world is beautiful when you look at it.»he said,his fingers were trembling as tried to reach for hers.

Their invisible chains were entangling on each other,every ring was forged with heavy duties,promises and responsibilities.At both ends a marriage,unspoken words that were trying to drag them away from each other.

But we can't be with anyone,we're made for a few people.Jacaerys was made for being loved by Y/n,she was made for being loved by him.On the same level,equals.His bones were her bones.

«Jace-»she took a few step back,knowing where it was going to lead.

They both tried in these months that they had spent together to not give in,to suffocate the burning desire that was growing between them.Anyone could seen that something was blooming,something pure and soft that needed to be protected by the harsh weight of reality.He was to be married to his cousin and to become King,she was to be some else wife.

«I think i love the version of myself that i’am when I’m with you.»he confessed,his breath was rapid«I love what I become,what I no longer hide,everything you make me reveal.»he sounded relieved but also in pain as he took in her ethereal figure.

«I didn’t do anything-»she dismissed him,she was becoming shy.

«I love everything about you,that's probably why i love myself when i'm with you.»his heartbeat was ringing in his ears,but he could still hear hers perfectly in tune with his«Whenever i’m with you i feel like i’m part of something.»he breathed out almost killing her.

Y/n made him feel at home,like everything in him was right.That yearning feelings,that desire to be part of something became real,he was part of her now.They spoke the same language,breathed the same air.She looked at him with different eyes and he couldn’t help to give her his heart.

«I think it’s about to rain.»she said,picking up the porcelain vase where the dirty brushes where.

As she made her way out of the room,a hand placed on her chest to keep her heart in it,she felt like she was about to explode.For Y/n painting was the metaphor for control.Every choice was hers:the canvas,the color.As a child she had neither a sense of the world nor a place inside it,but art taught her that our vision is only achieved with the will.The same goes for life. As long as she didn’t allow someone to get in her way.

Jacaerys went in the way.He was everywhere,he was her.The other half.She didn’t had control whenever he was around,her thoughts became his,her choices revolved around him.For the first time in her life she knew what she wanted.And the incessant and tormented desire of love,for her,was him.

He was walking fast behind her«Stop following me.»she yelled,quickening her pace,her face was hot and she was right,it was about to rain.

«I’m afraid I can’t.»Jacaerys said«My heart calls for yours.»it sounded like a lament.

Y/n immediately frozen on her feet,almost tripping on the stairs that were leading to the gardens«Shh!»she whispered looking around to make sure nobody had heard«There can be people everywhere here!»she warned him embarrassed.

Jacaerys was in front of her now,so handsome that he looked like she had drawn him«Do you think I care?I’ve been hiding all my life,I won’t hide what I feel for you.»he stated proudly.

«What you think you feel for me.»she corrected him,but when he took a step closer she didn’t moved an inch this time.

The gesture encouraged him even more«I know what my soul is been aching for.My love for you can’t even be contained in it.»he chuckled.

«Love is not measured my prince»Y/n had told him that evening,holding the porcelain vase in her hands,her beautiful skin gleaming under the cloudy sky and her hair messy from the sweet wind«it is not in what we do or say.Love is what we are.And I know who you are.»she had breathed out,almost as she was shy to admit it out loud.

Y/n didn’t seem to have noticed love too.As Jacaerys eyes cried out “I love you”,as in a sigh his heart fell exhausted,as with a smile of hers or with her sweet voice his soul vibrates.She didn't notice it with a caress of the tips of his hands,with the touch of his lips on her skin,with the intention of caressing her heart and kissing her soul.She haven't noticed that with her presence alone she changed his days,spring is in his heart even though the long winter was upon them.Y/n did not notice that:Jacaerys breathe her breath,it is oxygen for his desires,food for his feelings,fertile soil where the seed of love grows,he breathe her breath,in the preamble of a kiss,before savoring the nectar of her mouth,putting an end to a drought,with this expectation to feel her lips next to mine,selling their love with silent promise.

«We wasted so many months.»he had breathed on her sweet tasting,cherry colored lips«All we did was talk,while we could’ve been doing this.»he said,angry for her mouth again.

Y/n smiled in the kiss,he was the first to lain in«Have you been thinking about this?.»she asked,a hint of teasing in her voice as she caressed his sun kissed cheeks.

Jacaerys nodded his head,his eyes hazy,his heart was beating so fast he thought that it could escape his chest«Every time that i was watching you paint,all i could think about was kissing you senseless.»he admitted with a light chuckle.

He had spent many evenings in her company,in silent,taking or arguing about something stupid in her little art studio near the lake.Watching her being so passionate about something,the way her hair glimmered,her hands moving,all of her attention on what she was doing.He felt stupid for being jealous,to wanting her to touch him in the same way,to paint him and being passionate towards him in the same way.

The girl in his arms gasped,a little laugh tickled the back of her throat«Don’t you dare.You would’ve ruined my concentration.»she scolded him lovingly.

«Am i that distracting?»Jacaerys asked raising a brow,already knowing the answer to his question.

Y/n seemed to became smaller in his loving embrace and he pulled her closer to him,sheltering her«When i look at you,sometimes i feel overwhelmed that you exist.»she whispered,only him could make her feel so self conscious about herself.

She had never tried to paint what she felt for him,because to do it she would have to invent a new color.Y/n simply find comfort in the fact that he existed.When she sees him she got this feeling of relief,to known that she was alive and near him.

«You were right,it's going to rain.»he said,noticing how the sky had become darker«In every drop of rain there is a little hope;isn't that how you said?But then,what does that mean?»he asked with a small smile.

«It means that every drop of rain holds the promise of regrowth.»she answered«Every drop has its purpose,even if it doesn't know it.I believe that it can happen to us too to feel purposeless,but we have it.»she continued.

«Well,i have one now.»he said,caressing her chin lovingly.

«Do you?»she giggled.

«Yes.»he hummed«May i kiss you again?»Jacaerys asked,filling his heart with the feeling of her skin,supple and fresh,not blemished with the sickness that is death.

«Now?»Y/n said,looking around as she heard the sound of voices coming through the gardens.

And he smiled,that bright and slow smile again«Now is preferable,but i can do it for the rest of my life too.»he murmured before kissing her again and again and again.

But it was a lie,a horrible and disgusting lie.They didn’t have that time and she didn’t have the rest of his life.As she became dissolving flesh and melting bones,Jacaerys grew up in a man that wished to be alone with her once again.To be in that gardens,to watch her paint,to hear her voice and touch her young and precious skin again.

Jacaerys had dream of it again that night.

Y/n face,her familiar eyes.In his dreams she was still with him.Sometimes,when he touched her,her warmth seemed so real that he was out of breath.The eyelids trembled,the heart stretched and then tore in pain.He was bleeding in the silence of the night,alone,suffocating in the pillow the agony that during the day I tried at all costs to suppress.

He dreamed to hear her laugh.

«I miss you and i’m so sorry.»he whispered.His voice cracked.He hated it when it happened, because it made it even more real.It was like admitting that she wasn't there.That she would never be there anymore.That those memories were the only thing he had left.

Her eyes,her sweetness and her good heart.It had been a piece of advice,a perfume,a secretly given caress

Coming closer to the stone wall,Jacaerys,touched it.His fingers trembling like he had felt the cold water that was hugging her body.He couldn’t bring himself to trace his fingertips over her small figure,but he felt the itching desire to touch the painted water,to touch at least something that she had been part of and that loved.He doesn’t indulge it or grasp at it though.He gently absorbs a fleeting glimmer of something delicate that she had left behind,her love for the water,ocean,the lake at her parents house.Something that was part of her and just like her,he couldn’t hold it anymore.

How many things he would give,his crown,his own life to be the water that touched her skin,that held her so closely.Just once again,it would’ve been more than enough for him,to touch and feel her skin,inhale her scent just for a second again.

He kept his eyes were his hand was,he couldn’t look into hers but they were all he could think about.He memorized her face as if it was his mirror or a prayer that needs to be said every night.He would forget his name before he forgets her.

Then like a ghost,a mournful memory,she seemed to walk through the room,a white halo following her.Soft like a holy flower,her body seemed to be carved out from marble.Sparkly and calm eyes,her beautiful eyes,ruby lips,rosy cheeks.All her grace was in her vagueness,her voice was distant and soft,her manner languid,her features blurred and dreamy.She looked like a cruel immortal,finding her spiritual feast in the agonies of his dying heart.

The last time that he saw her was when he came back for her,after flying back to Dragonstone when his mother throne was usurped by his uncle,she was dead.She was killed and he couldn’t erase the imagine from his nightmares.It felt like he was looking at the painting of Gael Targaryen on the wall in her art studio.

Such a cruel faith to be abandoned and to be killed by the two things she loved the most:his love and water.Y/n was dying,gasping for air,trying to breathe,falling deeper and deeper into the darkness as her fragile body sank under the cold water.One of the soldiers that sympathized for the Greens had his rough hands around her delicate,thin neck as he was drowning her in the lake of her house.Then he left her lifeless body under the cold rain for Jacaerys to find.A threat,a challenge.

That night Oldtown burned,thousands had died for his love.He did too,he loved her so much that he had let her kill him,he will always adore her like a drowned person adore the sea.

«You are here early.»her ghost spoke to him with a tender whisper.

Jacaerys closed his eyes,they were burning«I missed you.»he said with a shaky tone.

«You should stop to come here.»she told him,moving quietly behind him.

He shook his head«I can’t live without you,without seeing your face.»

«But i’m not here,i don’t exist anymore.»she remained him.

«My bones are your bones.»he repeated«This is more than enough for me,till what will remain of me will lay with you.»he gestured at the portrait he was looking at.

«I wish you shouldn’t be doing this.»she smiled sadly.

«Me too.»he suppressed a cry«I wanted you to be my wife,the mother of my children.I’m sorry that life couldn’t gave us this.»he was shaking.

Then he felt a caress,like the wind in the spring«I will find you in another one.Where we will be free by any chain and you can kiss me every time you will se me paint.»it was a promise.

He blinked.He felt the acrid sensation behind his tongue again.He tried to breathe but his heart slowed down with heavy,suffocating thuds,a bruise with every beat.He took a step back as if to withdraw from the pain,his eyes were squinting around,warm and lost.The pain of climbed into his heart and he tried not to deform under that weight,but it was useless.

The throat closed and the sight flatned.Jacaerys soul was crumpled.Y/n absence collapsed on me all at once again . Sometimes it didn't seem possible to him. Sometimes it was as if that day in the garden had never existed,as if he was still expecting to see her come in the door,greet him and take him home.Sometimes he even thought he saw it among people,behind a man's hat or over the window of his room.

It was just an instant,but his eyes deluded him and his heart fell for it.«Endure»whispered Y/n voice,and the pain reached an unbearable peak. He felt the rubble inside him asking him to scream,vent,burst once and for all.She was eroding me from the inside.

Soon Y/n would take everything:his soul,his eyes,even his voice.They say there are five stages of mourning.The first is negation.The rejection of the loss,the inability to accept such a radical shock.The others are anger, processing,depression and finally acceptance. Jacaerys didn't recognize myself in any.He didn't want to reject reality.He couldn't make it happen.He was under the illusion of getting by, suppressing a pain that then exploded like a caged creature.He had put a key to his heart, but suffering is not something he could tame.

It breathes with him.It feeds on his hopes.It drinks his dreams,his looks and his fears.It sits at the table and watches him eat.He could pretend not to see it,but it won't leave him. Every now and then it whispers something to him.It has the sweetest voice in the world,but it's a heart-rung song.He can't forget it.It learns to wait for him.And it fits him,just like a living creature.Learn to live in his own silence,fly through his nightmares,dig into the dark and take root.It looks more like him than anyone else.The suffering is him.I took a deep breath, crossing his reflection.The reddened eyes contained the pain that he could no longer suffocate.He kept strangling it,suppressing it, locking it up and gagging it in his most hidden ravines.

And looking at that familiar face in his soul,Jacaerys prayed that he could see Y/n again,one day.So as to show her the empty shell that he was without her — and then he would have caressed her,but with her own sweetness.Squeezing her until she merged with his heart,he would say to her:«Endure with me, because I can't do it alone.»

He had known love and it had broken his heart.

He had finally understood one thing:there are thousands of ways to die in the world.Those who kill you outside,and those who kill you inside.But there is only one engraved with your name and it beats in another person's chest.

«Stay»he whispered to her.«Stay in the room. Stay in this moment.Stay with me.»he pleaded.

But of course she never does.She wasn’t there anymore.She was immortal,stuck and framed forever in his heart and in between the art and history of the city they fell in love in.

[grimmbitty]

Introduction to the Rock of Eternity~✨

This was my first time trying to make a drawing with a full background, a character, and shading and it took soOoOo long 😭 lmfao.

Anyways, this is my finished concept art for the train car that Billy gets off of once he’s magically transported to the Rock of Eternity. This version of the Rock of Eternity is a series of floating island that is in the middle of The Magic Realm.

This version of the Rock of Eternity is filled to the brim with jungle and rainforest nature and animals. That is how Tawny comes into the story. Tawny is a magical tiger who is the Wizard’s right-hand pet. They have a magical gemstone embedded in their head that grants them the power of telepathy, allowing them to communicate with others around them. They are not humanoid. They walk on four legs like a tiger and aren’t really fond of wearing human clothes.

I still have to draw the throne room for the champions, that’s where I want The Wizard and Tawny to spend most of their time. Working together as they divide up their time between recording/collecting ancient magic artifacts, resolving magic-related issues, and overall just trying to keep The Magic Realm safe. The Rock of Eternity is a protected hub of information and resources for anyone who is interested in learning about magic.

[ WRITING CONTINUES BELOW ⬇️ ✍️📝 ]

⚠️ Content warning: mentions of slavery in ancient Egypt, mentions of tyranny, clear portrayals of villainous intent, moral corruption etc.

It is a tireless job, that always has a constant flow of work to be completed. This also explains why The Wizard is looking for a champion of magic. He is looking for a pupil to train. Someone who will assist him protecting/saving the other realm. The Wizard sees The Mortal Realm as a mess that is in desperate need of assistance.

The Wizard decides to launch a project where he will expand his influence to The Mortal Realm in an attempt to solve all the problems he sees that plague the mortals of Earth. This project starts roughly about 5,000 years ago, when The Wizard believes he has found a worthy champion, Teth-Adam.

Teth-Adam proves to be a very powerful champion, who actively trains his newfound powers to help harness them to their full potential. He also becomes very involved in his studies of magic. Spending his early adulthood growing alongside The Wizard and Tawny as they eventually form a family-like connection. This joyful aspect of Adam’s life is in sharp contrast to his life in The Mortal Realm. Where he is a slave in ancient Egypt, being forced to help with the construction of the pyramids.

Eventually, Adam starts to corrupt. He returns to The Mortal Realm and begins to use his powers as a tyrant. He successfully frees the people of Egypt from their current enslavement however, instead of letting them roam free and begin to build their own lives, Adam has a different plan in mind. With his arrogance and ego afoot, he decides that he is the one true ruler of Egypt, and seizes complete control of the country.

Adam believes that he is the best possible person to rule over Egypt. He sees himself as a strong, competent leader. A pillar of strength who wants to optimize Egypt to it’s fullest potential. As his overt political power starts to corrupt him, Adam starts to micromanage the Egyptian people, turning the country into a complete and total dictatorship.

The Wizard sees this corruption that Adam is forcing over the people in Egypt and tries to talk some sense into him. Telling Adam that he did a good thing by freeing the people of Egypt however, in seizing complete control over the country he himself has become the one of tyrants he swore to destroy. Adam isn’t hearing any of it, he believes he is different from any previous leaders of Egypt because he has the country’s best interests at heart. Everything he has done in his rule has only improved the country, so he was clearly destined to be Egypt’s one true leader.

The Wizard then realizes that there is no getting through to Adam. They have a dramatic confrontation. The Wizard with a heavy heart, realizes that Adam has grown to be a very powerful advisory and is willing to fight for his rule over Egypt.

The Wizard eventually wins the battle however, doesn’t have the heart to kill Adam because they formed a very strong father/son relationship over the years as The Wizard was training Adam as his champion. As a last resort The Wizard decides to banish Adam to the furthest star in the galaxy. The Wizard reverses Adam’s influence over Egypt. He helps them to establish a proper democracy before returning to The Magic Realm to grieve over what he had to do to Adam, someone he saw as his own son.

The Wizard and Tawny mourn for many moons, causing the Wizard to put an indefinite pause on his project, leaving The Mortal Realm with no champion for the time being.

Fast forward about 5,000 years, The Wizard realizes in his old age, that he is growing weaker and weaker as the centuries pass. He ponders the idea of trying to find another Champion of Magic. Tawny tries to talk him out of it, reminding him of how poorly that went last time and saying there is no reason to want to do that again. The Wizard eventually changes Tawny’s mind once he reminds his fuzzy friend that once the Wizard is dead and gone, that Tawny will be unable to keep up with the responsibilities of the Rock of Eternity all by themselves.

The Wizard doesn’t really want to find a new champion, but he deems it necessary because he wants to make sure there is always enough people/resources to keep the balance of magic. He wants to personally train a mortal to eventually one day take over his duties, guiding them closely to make sure they are on the correct path. Hoping that now that he and Tawny are both wiser and older that they can find one pure, good soul to build into the perfect hero, and avoid repeating their old mistakes.

The Wizard and Tawny search for hundreds of years in an attempt to try and find a new Champion of Magic, but no one they bring to the Rock of Eternity seems to have a completely pure and good soul.

After years and years of tirelessly searching, they eventually stumble upon Billy Batson. Unfortunately Billy, like everyone who came before him, has imperfections and moments of human weakness that lead The Wizard and Tawny to initially discard him as a possible champion.

Then Billy questions their judgment, questioning them if there is such a thing as a “completely pure good person”, explaining that everyone has their flaws no matter how “good” they are. Suggesting that The Wizard and Tawny have been searching for so long because they’re looking for peoples flaws instead of their strengths.

This convinces The Wizard to change the conditions of his search. Deciding to comb over Billy’s mind again, but this time looking for the good within him instead of his flaws. The Wizard begins to see that Billy has a lot of moments that show him being a good kid and genuinely trying to help people, showing that Billy genuinely has a good heart.

The Wizard and Tawny mull over this decision and bicker amongst each other. They eventually decide that the Wizard has already burned thousands of years on this search so far, and they don’t know how much longer he has left to live as it is. Better to choose this kid who obviously has a good heart, and help mold him into a hero than to wait around for another thousand years, possibly having The Wizard die before he ever found a replacement.

And then, The Wizard decides to bestow the powers of Shazam to Billy Batson, making him the next Champion of Magic.

Very shortly after this decision is made, Adam returns to Earth. He has spent the last five thousand years traveling across the galaxy in an attempt to eventually make it back to Earth. He is very hurt by the Wizard’s decision to banish him to the furthest star in the galaxy and seeks to make amends.

However, when Adam finds out that The Wizard has chosen a new champion this sends him into a complete and utter rage. He sees this as The Wizard trying to replace him, both as a champion and as a son.

It’s a total slap in the face to Adam since he just spent the last 5,000 years traversing the cosmos to see The Wizard again. Adam sees it as a complete dismissal of the deep and meaningful familial connection they once shared to replace him with his new champion, Billy.

Adam knows that Billy is on the same path that he once was, being trained by The Wizard and Tawny to become the new Champion of Magic, and that they eventually plan to have him manage/protect The Rock of Eternity.

Adam resents the idea that he could ever be replaced and seeks to seize control over The Rock of Eternity. He plans to kill both The Wizard and his new champion to prove his superiority and “show them” that he was always destined to be the one true champion of magic.

His villainous behavior is not only motivated by his desire to have control, but also by his deep internal hurt of being replaced by Billy. Adam sees the terms “champion” and “son” as interchangeable. To him they mean the same thing, and Adam will stop at nothing to prove himself because deep down he wants The Wizard’s approval.

The Wizard and Tawny were the closest thing Adam ever had to a real family and after spending thousands of years trying to get back to them, he returns only to find he’s been replaced, and that is a pain he’s never felt before.

Adam doesn’t know how to cope with the feelings that erupt within him besides crushing all competition and once again using his tyrannical personality traits to try and prove his worth.

End. ⚡️

Wow that was a long one, lol. Anyways I hope you guys enjoyed. I know the writing of this post was a post about Black Adam’s origins rather than The Rock of Eternity, but I hope you enjoyed regardless.

As always let me know what you guys think. I’m always open to suggestions since I’m making my own version of Shazam anyways lol. ⚡️💕

[tavplum]

Personal update! (With pictures)

Got married two days ago! 🥰 It was such an amazing day full joyful moments! My dear friend played on her guitar "I want to live" from Baldurs Gate as my partner and I walked the aisle and it was kfjdkdjdkjdjd I can't even describe how much it meant to me!

We had to change some of our plans because it rained a lot on that day, but I'm so glad it did because it led to one of the memories that will hold really dear to my heart.

As I was waiting for the rain to stop so that I could finally walk to the tent where the ceremony had to be changed to, two dear friends of mine showed up to the venue with an umbrella. As soon as we saw each other we were so happy and excited to be together. I asked them if they could help me get to the tent. They immediately hold my dress up and protect me from the rain. I feel that I had the coolest moment with my two goth friends escorting me to my wedding lmaoo

So glad for the shoes that I chose to wear because I was comfortable the entire time!

Also the photographer left this on our dinner table... 🫠😭💜

Another picture that my dear friend took that I absolutely adore

Finishing the post with this little Astarion drawing that a friend of mine drew on her postcard 🥰

[sitp-recs]

HP Rec Fest, Day 30

Here we come with more @hprecfest! Today I’m only reccing rare pairs since I couldn’t think of any pre-canon Drarry fics 🤔 I wonder if canon divergent / canon rewrite applies?? I don’t read them often either way, so I figured this would be a good opportunity to boost lesser known fics. I think this is my favorite rec post for the fest so far - there’s something so poetic in reccing these two specific fics alongside each other since Little Compton Street verse was my first (unforgettable, devastating) contact with Prongsfoot and 5 years later here I am reading them again - this time welcoming the pain. More embarrassing emosh blabbing below!

Day 30) a pre-canon fic:

empire builders by shecrows (James/Sirius, E, 25k)

Say, James, he rehearses in his head. Remember that time we were both roaring drunk at the end of term, and you put your cock in my mouth, and I came so hard I still get tingly thinking about it? Was that just a one off, d’you think, or did you want to do it again sometime?

Prongsfoot my beloved 😭😭😭 sometimes I feel like I’ll never feel as strongly about a ship as I feel for them which sounds so crazy because I don’t even read it! or, well. after being utterly ruined by Winter of ‘79 (curiously a fic within LCS verse as mentioned below) I promised myself I wouldn’t look for this ship anymore bc the inevitable tragedy of it depressed me way too much. I locked them away in a secret space deep within my heart and only allowed myself to re-awaken those feelings this year, with the brilliant empire builders. what a fic! a few lines in and I was hooked and completely obsessed with Sirius’ unbelievably spot on voice, the peak friends to lovers dynamics, and the unbearable sexual tension mixing guilt and devotion (my favorite shippy combo btw). fuck, they are so young and so lovable, and so attuned to each other it makes me wanna cry. never before a 25k fic has felt so short, I’ve read it in a frenzy and couldn’t stop thinking about their love for days. the best word to describe my state after this fic is “tormented” which might as well be the best compliment I’ve ever given in a rec.

Play Me Like A Love Song by @writcraft (Minerva/Will, E, 67k)

Minerva McGonagall doesn’t believe in love at first sight, which is why her instant attraction to drag king Wilhelmina ("Will") Grubbly-Plank is so unexpected. War tears apart the wizarding world and as one battle ends Minerva and Will must fight once more, this time for the lives of their friends on Little Compton Street. A love story spanning five decades defined by music, laughter and tears, in which love is not always easy, but it’s always worth fighting for.

truly a masterpiece of lesbian fiction, this fic is more like a religious experience, bold, brutally honest, romantic, eye-opening and necessary. I never thought I’d care so much for a ship like Will & Minerva but they worked their way inside my heart and I’m deeply moved by how their story encompasses everything that’s inherent to the queer experience: love, loss, resistance and hope. there’s so much joy and grief walking hand by hand, and it is our privilege to watch the characters mature and experience life as individuals and as a couple. Writ crafts oh so thoughtfully two stunning character studies (Minerva’s voice omg, please don’t @ me on my competence kink) while taking us by the hand into the magical universe of Little Compton Street, which is so completely irresistible and healing. I adore the atmosphere, the imagery, the soundtrack, and how this seductive setting allows them to explore their queerness in such a free, proud and joyful way *getting emosh* I feel like nothing I add here will make this story justice, it’s such a poignant and transformative fic but sadly deeply underrated like it happens to so many wlw tales. I hope this rec inspires at least one person to check it out and while at it please also check the entire series with a Drarry piece and a Prongsfoot piece, a perfect trifecta!

[acourtofquestions]

Favorite character from Throne of Glass so far? And try to guess mine 😜

Ooh, a good question! One that I actually have an answer to; despite the fact my answer really is all of them😂 (well all minus the obvious ones your NOT supposed to like; Arobynn, Maeve, Rourke Farran, the Blackbeak Matron, etc.) and while I am going to try & self-edit (something I’m terrible at, as any glance at my blog will show😂) the easiest explanation I have is probably this:

I will always utterly adore Fleetfoot like no other. Same with Abraxos. And Elide (who I seem to be in agreement with the characters; we would die for that cinnamon roll😂)

Fenrys snuck up on me & I’m still figuring it out, but I think he’s funny, and very charismatic/compassionate.

Asterin Blackbeak has really grown to have such a joy-filled place in my heart. & I really enjoy the 13’s dynamic & badassery. So, of course Manon is on there too (from the first introduction when I was like… she’s killing people… but somehow I like her? To now being the child of peace, the hope & heart of the “heartless”).

Aedion (despite our occasional moments of a tiff) I love the way he loves. Dorian (I don’t think we share an opinion on this one, which is totally okay) I just really appreciate his mind! Chaol was for a while then the opposite, right now I think I’m positive neutral-ish? … I can pretty much always find things to love in main/side/random characters.

And don’t get me started on Sam Cortland… that man… always beloved😭

Lysandra Ennar (despite that EoS plotted ending lol😅😅) I love her, I love the way she loves her found family, I love her sisterhood with Evangeline (esp. dear to me in my own life), & I appreciate the way her trauma is NOT her entire story.

Rowan Whitethorn (who funny enough was NOT a favorite for a while; twas a rough start but once I loved him, (& will never) not love him).

And now dwindled down to the answer of all answers, beyond even this series or Maasverse (of all fandoms this & she have become an all-time fav) Aelin Galathynius; I almost can’t explain it & would just say READ 8 BOOKS & you’ll get it😂 she’s such an arc & fleshed out character, a kind I don’t see often (especially in powerful female character personalities when a main character or any role for that matter) she makes sense to me, there’s a lot beyond the surface, she & that have meant a lot to me in my own life/trauma/grief & (much like the MANY characters that fall for her for this same reason) she's just something else; wild, fiery, witty & hilarious, impossibly smart, sharp but king, empathetic/understanding & compassionate, fiery yet controlled, deep-feeling & loving, bold & somehow joyful, brave (even if afraid), & very much the force of life & humanity & falling in love with living. She’s the (fire) heart of the story for a good reason.

Now, as far as your favorite goes THAT'S is a very good question (one that I will also leave in your ask box in case it’s easier; whichever works best for you whether here or there :-) is it cheating to have glanced at your blog previously?😂 … okay, so, I’m going to guess based on that & conversations plus general vibes Manon, Rowan, or Aelin. Less so the latter, esp. as I think it just vibes a little more (idk why… total guess here😂😝)? I definitely think your questions/thoughts are very well-put & intelligently written, plus fun & kind… so I’m leaning towards Rowan more so because of the amount of heart & “a dreamer's heart” he does have? We’ll see, regardless I have no doubt it’s a great one & can’t wait to hear it😆 so, thanks SO much for the double fun ask!!😊🫶

[sarahscribbles]

Let’s do a fun parade to celebrate 1989 coming home tomorrow !!

💚💛💜❤️🩵🖤🩷🤍🤎💙

Name our your top 3 songs from each album and tag the swifties you know to do the same ?!

What do you think??

💚💛💜❤️🩵🖤🩷🤍🤎💙

How could you do this to me. Question mark 😭😭😭

Ok lemme see!

Taylor Swift 💚

• Our Song

• Teardrops On My Guitar

• Should’ve Said No

Fearless 💛

• Fearless

• The Best Day

• Mr Perfectly Fine

Speak Now 💜

• Long Live

• I Can See You

• Castles Crumbling

Red ❤️

• All Too Well

• The Moment I Knew

• Message In A Bottle

1989 🩵

• Clean

• How You Get The Girl

• Wonderland

Reputation 🖤

• I Did Something Bad

• King Of My Heart

• Don’t Blame Me

Lover 🩷

• All Of The Girls You Loved Before

• Cruel Summer

• Daylight

Folklore 🤍

• Illicit Affairs

• Epiphany

• Mirrorball

Evermore 🤎

• Champagne Problems

• No Body, No Crime

• Marjorie

Midnights 💙

• You’re On Your Own, Kid

• Maroon

• Karma

Damn this was HARD!!

Tagging some fellow Swifties!

@the-lady-amphitrite @cleo-fox @use-your-telescope @coldnique @loopsisloops @muddyorbsblr @lokisbiiiitch1993 @joyful-enchantress @give-me-a-moose

[witchofthemidlands]

witchofthemidlands thoughts on “the devil's chord”

i know i KNOW maestro is bad but jinx monsoon, you scary legend, can you stay in the whoniverse forever 🎶😍🎶

✨ this is my personal opinion, media is subjective you might not agree with my opinions & that's just fine✨

i love that we’ve got an episode focused on music, my headphones are an anxiety ridden day away from being surgically attached to my soul. music is soothing, is it is my peace & doctor who has such beautiful music from the gorgeous theme tune to stunning pieces of music like: “songs of captivity & freedom”, “love don't roam” “turn left”, “who are you?”, “clara’s diner”, “my angel put the devil in me”, “the long song”, “the lone dalek”, “martha triumphant”, “the greatest story never told”, “this is gallifrey”, “the doctor forever” to “the goblin song” & scene stealing music choices like “tainted love”, “toxic”, “voodoo child”, “chances”, “rise up” & “spice up your life” doctor who is full to the brim of the most emotive & captivating tunes that i thank that it is fantastic that it’s the focus of an episode of my favourite show of all time.

this might just be me but the opening… it's giving rocketman.

MAESTRO 😍 the costume is everything this is one of the best introductions to a whoniverse villain i’ve seen in ages.

HENRY HARBINGER 😂 why i laughed so hard at that one i don't know.

is it just me or is maestro giving ✨winifred sanderson✨

ahh! ☹️ no continuation from the carla & cherry ending ☹️

fifteen, that red shirt is beautiful 🤩

“IVE GOT WIGS GALORE” oh 🥹 he's so happy! this is so lovely to see a version of the doctor just being so joyful, they're having the best time with their new friend & it’s incredible. i love them both so much, i love them going to pick outfits together (headcanon that they do each other's makeup)

pictures of this episode have been around ages but they look immaculate.

ruby being so joyful & having the best time is so lovely to see (the happiness is not going to last so i am clinging onto these moments like a space baby clinging to ruby 😭😩😭)

i still think it’s so odd that the beatles are characters 😅

honestly i know it’s meant to be bad but that would probably be up there with one of my favourite beatles songs if it were real.

am i cracking up or is that the same lady who was talking to isaac newton in wild blue yonder? 😬 is she the new “bad wolf” / “saxon” 😬

the spoon falling past the salt 👀 fourtenth fucked around & fifteen’s finding out 😭

SUSAN MENTION?!!! A SUSAN MENTION. A SUSAN FOREMAN MENTION? nah, nah because a friend of mine will hopefully back me up on this. i was literally saying hours before “the devil's chord” aired that i wished that there had been a new who update on susan because i'd always assumed that she might have chosen not to regenerate after living a long life with david or had gone back to fight & died in the early days of the time war. i now have a canon update on susan so be careful what you wish for i guess 😅

i am even more convinced that mrs. flood might turn out to be susan now.

ruby wrote music to her friend trudy when a girl broke her heart 🥺 ruby sweetheart i love you 🥺

THE GIGGLE 😨 i will admit from when i first saw a picture of maestro & they brought up the legions in the specials that maestro would be a part of it or even the one who waits but i got near taken out when the doctor said THE PANTHEON. ARE THEY GOING TO MAKE THE PANTHEON OF DISCORD THE LEGIONS?!?? THE WAY I LOST MY ENTIRE MIND THE SECOND THE WORD PANTHEON WAS SAID IT DID SOMETHING TO ME PHYSICALLY.

possibly the most useful sonic in the doctor's history. i really hope they make a replica of this, it looks like it would be an incredible fidget accessory.

“the world did not end in 1963” oh nooo love 😭 this is not going to end well 😬

ruby mentioning beyoncé & sam fender, i know she's in a band & seems to be musical but ruby OFFICIALLY has taste. the sam fender name drop especially near took me out because his music is just otherworldly, i love his music so much 🤩

OHH THE APOCALYPSE LANDSCAPE AHHH THIS IS GIVING ME FLASHBACKS TO THAT ONE ELEVEN & AMY GAME I HAD AN UNHOLY ADDICTION TO AS A CHILD.

honestly doctor who hits harder than crack.

😭 “where's my mum?” 😭 i wanted to hug MY mum after sweet ruby said this 😭

MAESTRO THOSE SHOES 😍

i feel like if the toymaker & maestro were in the same room it would rival the cinematic masterpiece that is the great dalek & cybermen roast of doomsday.

the doctor kissing the tardis, never change you beautiful person.

“playing lovesick songs for heartbroken lesbians” a) ruby, i may require your services one day & b) IS THIS THE FIRST TIME THEY'VE ACTUALLY USED THE WORD LESBIAN ON DOCTOR WHO?!?! 🥹 this lesbian salutes this episode!

the aesthetic of maestro's notes is everything to me it may be deadly but so aesthetically pleasing. they are a work of art, the notes & maestro 😍

👀 alien ruby alien ruby alien ruby 👀perhaps even one of the legion 👀😬👀

yessss! doctor who epic musical battle

“i have lived & i have loved” 😭 every time fifteen says something like this, it goes to the very core of me, how ncuti delivers the full range of emotions as the doctor is just incredible, he is incredible. he's officially in my top favourite versions of the doctors (he was already but this, this makes it forever)

the dog song is going to save the day.

the dog song, did not in fact save the day, but eh at least it worked (maestro don't goooo 😭😩😭)

what if the one who waits is the trickster? my clown hat went on the SECOND the doctor mentioned the pantheon & the trickster is always waiting for a way to breakthrough to the main universe, it is also one the most terrifying villains rtd has ever created & was somehow one of the main antagonists of a children’s show, if you're reading this & are not familiar with “the sarah jane adventures” this thing is scarier than some of the really intense doctor who villains, the trickster is no joke. i have always thought it would be incredible to have the trickster in doctor who because whilst they pushed it as far as they could on “the sarah jane adventures” i think that they could make the trickster one of the scariest creatures to exist in the whoniverse on doctor who.

A MUSICAL NUMBER?!! brilliant ���

THERE'S ALWAYS A TWIST AT THE ENDDDDDDD 💃🏻

THE DOCTOR LOOKS SO HAPPY 🥹

MURRAY GOLD?!? (where’s the series 10 soundtrack, king 😭)

harbinger 😬

the dancing on abbey road in the brought such a smile to my face ahh i love them so much 😊🥰😊

THE TARDIS HAS THE LAST NOTES 🥹

FANTASTIC 🤩 BONKERS 🤩 AHHHHH my brain just can't comprehend this one, it's just happy explosions of pure whoniverse joy in there.

jinx monsoon has played one of the best villains i have seen on doctor who in ages, what a performance, what an outfit (maestro i want your silver shoes from the apocalypse) it would be bad but selfishly i want them back.

am now wondering if “ruby sunday” may end up being something to do with the trickster, yes, i know that would be repeating history because of sky but those stories were never actually made so perhaps they're recycling the idea? would not be the first time that this is happened, that balls to the wall masterpiece of a show that is wizards vs aliens got some of the planned “the sarah jane adventures” stories after all.

this season has got off to such a good start, i can't wait to see what’s next, “the devil’s chord” was brilliant, it really wasn't what i was expecting & i love it, better than all my expectations, i will watch this one for years to come with either the biggest smile on my face or 😬 depending on what happens to ruby 😭

next week is… the return of moffat 😬 i will be fair, i promise to watch the episode with an open mind & judge it purely on how the episode is as it presents itself without any underlying negativity just because of the writer. i say this because i might need to be reminded of this when i come back to talk about “boom” because i am still upset about what happened to bill. yes, moffat has written some incredible episodes of doctor who, some fantastic stories, i'm not for one second saying that he hasn't but the last time i watched something moffat wrote i unleashed hell into an essay for my degree because he ruined my favourite characters from my second favourite book in the world.

[mun-of-orchid-and-friends]

Today is the day of the funeral so I won't be on as much...

Below are some pictures I took at the wake yesterday (1/2/2024) for anyone who is curious...

He was a veteran, loving father/grandfather/Great grandfather, and above all else... He gave out three peppermints to people with a smile on his face and goodness in his heart ❤️

Yes, my grandfather is... Was a veteran. He will get a veterans funeral today with the gun salute and all.

Not every veteran gets this privilege and it is sad 😭

My children even started to cry when they realized he was gone... (Until everyone showed up then it was like they were on sugar crack 🤣) but they livened things up for a while till we had to go home... Even the funeral directors appreciated my children's lively attitude.

If you're wondering why he gave out ONLY 3 peppermints well, he was a Christian man who gave out the peppermints as a reference to the Father, the son, and the holy Ghost... With the white representing purity and the red representing his blood. Don't worry, he never pushed his belief on anyone as he believed God was the only judge... and if you believed what you believed then God should judge you for what you believe, if that makes sense. As long as you are a good person then you had no problems with him.

He only wished kindness and good faith for people~ everyone in the community called him "The Candy Man" (in a good way).

And he only gave the candy to adults as he wanted to teach children never to accept candy from strangers, only your parents as the parents are to be responsible for their children.

If you have read this far I appreciate your time and I will try to be on tomorrow (1/4/2024) in the afternoon... I just didn't want y'all to worry and keep you updated without upsetting y'all. It is a sad time for me and my family BUT it is also joyful... He is home and no longer in pain.

[matrixwhore]

iwtv ep 4 rewatch thoughts

ep 4 starting with a sunrise bc the baby trap—the vampire Claudia—is the start of a new dawn in hell. only just like paul, she’s dead too…

ive shared some thoughts on this opening scene here

it breaks my heart that the first time we see the library with all it’s threads to Louis’ humanity/past (the books, the bench, the rocks etc. etc.) is when we’re properly introduced to Claudia given all she represented in Louis’ undead life. He brought her home to make up for what he was losing in the natural world/humanity (his sister/family etc. etc.) and to make up for his sins. but neither could ever truly live under his expectations or be what he needs (to no fault of theirs. tbc i don’t believe Claudia should have had to be what he needed). Claudia expected to play the role of their eternal child could not survive in their castle of lies in her own truth. a real magnolia tree could not survive within the confines of his penthouse coffin of self imposed (and maybe also imposed/enabled by Armand) delusions.

a magnolia tree is said to symbolize luck and stability (according to my quick google search) it’s first introduction in the show is being juxtaposed against the introduction of a character who suffered terrible luck and whose outcome contributes to Louis’ emotional instability. truly dreadful times.

the pink flowers symbolize: grace and femininity as well as joy, youth and innocence which reflects how Louis wants to remember Claudia i think. also the fact that it symbolizes Grace makes me want to be shot into the stratosphere. like please 😭. This is the pain with the vampire show.

i like the joyful and hopeful tone of the soundtrack as we dive in and get to know who she was. it really doesn’t give away what’s to come. it really speaks to the positive shift her addition to the rue royal townhouse brought, even though there was something much more grim happening beneath it. it also juxtaposes Daniel reading out a passage from her journal that is also bitter against the sweet feel of the soundtrack.

i also like that when Daniel picks up the journal that describes Claudia feeding from POWs there’s a wide shot that includes a blurred branch of the tree. which makes me think about that innocence symbolism in regards to how Claudia and her fate is viewed. Every decision that was made for this scene is encouraging/seducing the viewer to have a nuanced approach in how to we perceive Claudia before we get to the grit of it. Just like Louis/Rashmand encouraging Danny to start from the left—the sympathetic beginning—like i spoke about in the link above.

we see a quick shot of a drawn image of a bell in the journal Daniel picks up to read. bells are usually rung at the beginning and/or the end of something. in this case it is both the beginning and the end as we are introduced to Claudia when she is already dead.

and as we transition into Claudia’s pov Daniel takes the journal closer to the magnolia tree in a shot where the branch is once again blurred in the foreground.