#my inner teenager is healed 😭

[theflyingfeeling]

just got home from Ruisrock's Super Sunday, what do you mean I gotta go grocery shopping now and cook dinner 😭

[mellotronmkll]

I definitely just spent all of therapy talking about they might be giants but it's okay

[miaoua3]

hi^^ can u req for a joshua fic where in bf!shua took gf!reader to a date to celebrate the eldest daughter day, and made her feel like a teenager again — amusement park date, matchy headbands, sharing cotton candy, shopping galore after (which she didnt really got to do stuffs bec she busy with her ‘eldest daughter’ duties ykeim 🥺). just joshua making her feel like she deserves this treat too. thank you!

(sorry english isnt my first language 😭)

heyy! (first of, your english is perfect sweetie, have more trust in yourself❤️), and sure you can- i love writing fluff with our joshua, he’s just so sweet that he makes it impossible to not want to write the fluffiest things with him☹️anyway, i hope you enjoy this and that you take it easy! love you

Care For You

Pairing: joshua x f!reader

Genre: fluff, comfort (no hurt), amusement park date, healing your inner child, joshua best bf ever, mentions of bad relationships with your parents

Description: after noticing that you had a hard week (as well as hard life in general), joshua decides that the amusement park date is long overdue for the two of you❤️

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

joshua has always been very observant of the people he holds and loves dearly. even the things they themselves wouldn’t notice, he does. it’s always been in his nature to give out comfort to those around him who have hard time.

so after he noticed you move a bit slower, talk a little less, your dark circles get a bit darker, your work keeping you up a little bit longer than usual, getting easily annoyed at little inconveniences, he knew what kind of week you were having and how much pressure you’ve been putting on yourself.

you were always a little bit of an overachiever-nothing you ever did seemed enough for you. you have always been like this, ever since he had first met you.

joshua, based on the few things and stories you told him, knew that these issues and habits stemmed from your early childhood and they continued well into your adulthood. being the oldest daughter, who always had to act perfectly and accordingly, who your parents always had to count on not to disappoint them, who had to be this perfect image of a daughter for your younger siblings to have to look up to, who had to, in a way, raise them yourself, certainly seemed troubling to joshua.

joshua’s heart always ached whenever he saw how unkind and cruel both you yourself and your family were towards you.

especially when he saw just how good, hardworking, and kind you were to everyone around you.

he always wished he could somehow help you. to see how kind and loving you were. to make you see how proud of you everyone was, and how highly they thought of you. to heal what he never even broke.

so, that’s why, on the saturday night, as you came home from yet another excruciatingly exhausting day at work, you were bombarded with his gentle smiles, hugs and kisses, as well as a dinner that he prepared for you.

you knew your boyfriend well enough to see that this was just a setup for something bigger.

so you weren’t even surprised to have him wake you up the next morning at 6am (on your only free day).

this better be good, you thought as you looked at him through blurry eyes.

joshua, who was already dressed, was sitting on the bed beside you, his big hand gently patting your head.

smiling gently at you, he then spoke “hey baby, sorry to wake you up but we have somewhere to be, get up so you can get ready”, he pauses to kiss your forehead before continuing “the breakfast is ready and on the table. cmon now”.

no matter how unhappy you felt about being woken up so early, you were ready to hit the road (wherever it may lead you to) an hour later, still a bit sleepy but also excited for the new adventure that your darling boyfriend was taking you on.

holding his hand while he was driving, you find yourself feeling at peace for the first time in more than a week-as a matter of fact, so at peace that you felt yourself slowly drifting off to sleep again.

just as you were about to drift off to the dreamland, you felt his fingers slowly let go of your hand to instead caress your cheek carefully and gently, as his whisper reached your ear.

“sweet dreams, my sweet girl.”

the next time you woke up, it was hours later and the car wasn’t moving anymore, and your boyfriend was nowhere to be seen.

you tried to look for any signs as to where you might be (or where your boyfriend might be for that matter), but just then joshua opened the door to the driver’s side and got in.

seeing that you were awake now, he immediately smiled. “hey sleepyhead, just in time”, he said as he stretched across the middle section to give you a brief peck on your lips.

you, still kind of clueless and disoriented, just ask him “…in time for what?”.

joshua, finding you absolutely adorable, just smiles as he responds “you will see in a little bit. but first- breakfast.”, and then he’s getting out of the car and to your side to open your door for you.

five minutes later, you find yourselves in front of a cafe. but not just any cafe.

you find yourself in front of a cat cafe.

something you have always dreamed of visiting since you were a little.

you, slowly and with hopeful eyes, turn to joshua and with a trembling voice ask him “really?”.

joshua, fighting the urge to puke from happiness and summon all of the gods possible just to high five them for letting him make you this happy, gently smiles as he tucks a bit of stray hair behind your ear. “really.”

that’s all you needed to hear to quickly jump and hug him tightly for a little second before grabbing his hand to drag him inside.

trusting joshua to order something for you that you will like, you immediately sit down on the floor and let yourself be surrounded by all the possible cats there are, cooing at them as they rub themselves against you and climb all over you.

you were a bit busy by giving all the cuddles to the cute, beige and fluffy cat in your lap to notice how adoringly joshua was looking at you, as well as him snapping a few pictures to have this day be remembered by.

after half an hour of you just being preoccupied with the cats, joshua finally called you to eat because your hot chocolate was slowly getting colder to the point it would be undrinkable.

after an hour of you eating (and cuddling with cats some more), you find yourself in the car again. joshua, still refusing to tell you where you were going to, was only smiling excitedly as he was driving.

whatever it is that he’s taking me to, it must he good you think to yourself as you watch his excitement bounce off of the roof of the car.

and as you stood in front of a huge amusement park, you understood his smug and excited smiles.

because this was better than good for you.

this was something you have always dreamt of doing, but were never allowed to do while growing up due to your parents deeming it “a waste of everybody’s time”.

joshua just looks at you-to see how you’re feeling, what you’re thinking. he was so excited to have done this for you, he has been looking forward to seeing your reaction since he thought of the idea.

ever so slowly, you turn your had towards joshua, your eyes big and glossy, looking at him as if they were saying “is this for real? im not dreaming?”.

joshua, with a proud but humble smile, just says “surprise”.

in one moment he’s looking at you, smiling at you.

in the next he’s trying to keep you both standing, tumbling a little bit due to you jumping onto him, your face burying itself in his neck, arms wrapping themselves tightly around his waist.

regaining his balance, joshua hugs you right back just as tightly, his big hand gently taming down your hair.

with all of the gratefulness you’re feeling for him, you whisper in a somewhat broken voice “thank you. thank you. thank you.”, repeating the words like a mantra.

joshua just closes his eyes as he kisses the side of your head, still softly patting your head.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

to say that the whole day was spent doing nothing but what you wanted was a given. joshua honestly didn’t care what you were doing as long as it was what you wanted and that you were doing it together.

so, naturally, you two started by riding the teacups. and if joshua felt like puking every spin the cup you two were in spun into? well he surely wasn’t going to tell you and ruin the mood for you.

the moment you two saw the stand with silly headbands in the distance, joshua knew what your next stop was.

so that’s why not even five minutes later he found himself with mickey mouse inspired headband (that was also matching your own minnie mouse headband) on top of his head. and naturally, you just had to take millions of pictures of you two together because how could you not when joshua was looking so damn cute?

following that, you dragged him to the sweets stand, where there were all sorts of candies available. as he did the whole day today, joshua naturally paid for the candies too. he wasn’t surprised at all when you shyly asked him if you could buy you a heart shaped cotton candy-and of course he said yes.

how could he ever say no to the love of his life?

while you were sitting down on a bench, joshua was looking up at the map of the whole amusement park and what rides you could go onto next-all while you were feeding him pieces of cotton candy here and there.

seeing that the park had a lot to offer, you two decided to just walk around for a bit and explore what you could ride next while the cotton candy in your stomach settles down a bit more so you won’t have to puke it all out as a result of the said ride.

and so came all the rigged games.

the moment joshua saw you looking at the big white teddy bear that you can only win by hitting the target with an arrow, he knew that he was going to do everything in his power and spend so much money just to win you that stupid teddy bear.

(spoiler alert: it took him 45 minutes and much more than he expected to win that teddy bear but it was all worth it in the end as he watched you squeal and jump around with the said teddy in your arms, struggling to hold him in your arms due to its humongous size).

the moment you spotted the tank filled with little goldfish, you immediately dragged him to try to catch one. (this time, you did tell him to stop trying after 10 minutes because you felt so sorry for him trying so hard for you.)

after playing many more games (and losing terribly at them), you saw a booth that said “tarot cards- one reading 5$” and you again, dragged joshua by your intertwined hands.

for some reason, the woman that did the readings had the policy that only one person can enter the booth-which screamed ‘scam’ to joshua but alas, who was he to say no to you?

and so he waited outside for five minutes that it took for the woman to read you your cards.

when he saw you coming out, he noticed that you had a weird expression on your face-not quite sad or upset, but more so like you were processing some thoughts.

feeling a bit uneasy, joshua gently grabbed your arm and rubbed a tumb over your shirt as he asked “you okay, baby?”

breaking out of your trance, you smile reassuringly at him. “yeah. you should go in though. the lady is so wise and she really knows what she’s doing”.

at your insistence, joshua pushes the dark purple curtain out oddly his way so he can enter.

waisting no second, the middle aged lady spoke “ah, we have another sceptic and nonbeliever hier”, she chuckles as she focuses on mixing the cards together.

joshua just looks at her like a deer caught in the headlights.

amused by his reaction, the lady points her ring cladded hand to the chair across her “please, sit my child”.

still unsure and now also a little bit confused, joshua sits down and looks at the lady in front of him with furrowed eyebrows.

not paying his confused state any mind, the lady asks him “so, what will it be. love, money or career?”

joshua focuses all of his attention on her quick hands mixing the cards together, opens his mouth to answer before he gets interrupted yet again “love it is then”.

now thoroughly freak out, joshua just watches with wide eyes as she slowly takes out 5 cards and puts them on the table in front of them.

how the hell did she knew what i was going to say?

the lady hums as she looks at the cards with a thoughtful expression.

“you’re afraid that you’re not doing enough for your lady huh? I wouldn’t worry too much about that, if i were you. instead, i would focus my energy on making her open up more to you, she seems to be carrying a lot of darkness within herself. let her let it all out and you two will get even closer than you are”.

she then taps on the middle card in the first row with her long nail. “i sense some big energy from you, energy that could bring you two potential problems, but as long as you two communicate and always choose each other over letting the problem win, you two shall be fine.”

she then points to the card next to that one. “unfortunately, she will have to deal with a big heartbreak in the near future, someone in her close family will be the one to do it. that will be the time where you will have to be strong for the both of you and take really good care of her. but worry not, for you will help her tremendously at those times.”

the lady then looks at one of the card on the bottom and smiles “ah, so we are already at the stage where we’re looking for the ring huh. make it simple-the whole thing. instead of grand gestures, she will treasure you showing that you care for her much more. make it intimate and sweet.”

joshua blushes at being exposed, especially because he just started looking for a ring not even two weeks ago.

she hums again as she looks at the cards again, before suddenly grabbing his hand, turning it palm up towards her. looking at it for a second, she closes his hand and taps the back of it lightly. “you have nothing to worry about, you two have a love story straight out of a romance novel in front of you. just makes sure to always take care of her heart first and it will all be fine”, she smiles softly at him.

just as he was about to leave the tent, the lady calls for him.

“ans joshua?”

he turns around and looks at her with questionable eyes.

the lady smirks at him as she answers “go for the second ring. she will like that one much more”.

blushing furiously, he quickly escapes the tent and looks around for you before his eyes find you already looking at him.

approaching each other, you question him about how it was, all while he avoids answering your questions, saying things like ‘so stupid, who would even believe all that”, muttering profanities at the lady, all with rosy cheeks.

it is only after five minutes of walking away from the tarot tent that it hits joshua.

he never told her what his name was.

looking at you to his right, joshua just thinks to himself that…

maybe the lady had the right about the second ring being the right pick for you.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

after riding more rides that made him almost puke your lunch out (the huge rollercoaster being the worst one out of all the others), joshua then starts dragging you by the hand, for the first time that day not being the one to be dragged around.

he seemingly knew where he was headed, his grip on your hand strong in fear not to lose you in the crowd, his broad shoulders and short hair being the only thing you could focus on.

the night was slowly setting on the sky, the stars barely visible due to all the light pollution in the park, and yet the only thing you could focus on is your lover in front of you and how warm his hand felt holding yours.

looking at him and on the whole day he organised for you today made you realise that this, right here, the person in front of you, was your true family. there hasn’t been a day since you two met where he hasn’t taken care of you and your heart. and then today? you can’t remember if you ever felt this…carefree and youthful. it had you wondering if this is how children should feel like? is this what it feels like…to have somebody love your inner child with all of its ‘faults’ and imperfections? you certainly wouldn’t know.

but looking at joshua…you just might be getting the idea about it.

you were so focused on your thoughts that you didn’t even notice where you were headed until you two were standing in front of what you could only describe as your dream come true.

a ferris wheel.

the minute you realised what was coming next, you gasped and started jumping up and down next to joshua, in process shaking him too due to him still holding onto your hand, his smile getting broader and brighter the longer he looks at you being so excited.

after a few minutes, your turn to buy tickets comes too. but for some reason, your boyfriend wasn’t quite done with being secretive and all that-because you find him whispering something to the man behind the counter, as well as handing him way more cash than the two tickets cost.

when you question him about it, he just smiles as he responds “you will see soon enough”.

your boyfriend had this weird habit, where he preferred sitting next to you rather than across from you, says that he would much rather feel pain in his neck from having to turn his head to be able to look at you than to reach across the table or whatever it is that is between you two to be able to hold your hand.

so, naturally, when you two enter the carriage, he sits right next to you.

and after a few minutes your carriage starts to move.

the view below you leaves you breathless. thousands of little lights in the distance, all twinkling in different colours. the people below you looking so incredibly small, you would’ve never guessed that they were right there, at the same place you two have spent the whole day.

you find yourself gasping and keeping your mouth open the whole time.

the fact you only realise later when joshua shows you a photo of you he took just now.

you carriage makes one full turn.

and then the second turn.

but then, on the third turn, it stops right on top.

just as you start questioning joshua what is happening, a single firework goes off in the night sky.

and then the second.

and then you lose the count of how many firework there are. multiple going off at the same time, looking like they’re fighting for the dominance, they all look so pretty, going off in so many colours and shapes.

you find yourself wondering…is this what a child feels like watching the fireworks for the very first time? it must be, because why else would you feel like this watching this beautiful sight for the very first time?

yes, your first time watching the fireworks.

something nobody ever knew about you.

not even joshua.

(or so you thought.)

after a few minutes, the magic comes to a stop, the stars now being the only thing to see in the night sky.

ever so slowly, you turn around to look at your boyfriend, a gentle smile grazing the edges of his mouth.

normally, joshua would find himself panicking at the sight of tears rolling down your cheeks. knowing (or, well, presuming) why you were crying, he just reaches with his tumb to wipe away the little droplet falling from your eyes.

to be completely honest, joshua never cared enough for firework and meteor showers like you did, probably because he has witnessed those things so many times, he forgot how surreal it must be seeing it for the very first time.

but looking at you right now, he found himself thinking one thing only.

joshua was never going to take one single firework going off for granted ever again.

smiling a little while his tumb still runs your cheek, he asks “did you like it?”

and that seems to have done it for you.

because suddenly, without any warning, you start sobbing, gripping the front of his shirt as you lower your head onto his shoulder.

joshua just hugs you closer, his hand gently patting your head.

through sobs you find yourself saying “t-thank you, thank you so much-so much f-for today, i-i can’t even- i- you make me so-so happy, you are l-literally my dream man, y-you are everything i have ever- i have always dreamed of i-i-“ breaking off in the middle of it to let out all the sobs you had to hold in in order to get your words out.

joshua suddenly brings both of his hands to your cheeks, bringing your face up and in front of his own.

with all the seriousness and honesty he possesses, he says “you are my dream come true too, baby. actually, better than any dream i have ever had. you are my reality, that’s what makes you even better.”

kissing joshua, right there, in the little carriage, you find yourself thinking one thing and one thing only.

if it were possible, you would spend decades being and feeling like a little child.

as long as you get to do it with the love of your life beside you.

[emotionalsupportboy]

I'm crying, screaming, throwing up, because this is literally healing my inner teenager who never got to have this cute high school romance experience 😭😭

[tsugarubecker]

Sometimes I kinda laugh at myself for being 30 & writing analyses of queer subtext depicted in a show about teenagers (as I work to heal my inner child who didn’t get to see this representation on TV). And I think about how I am hanging out with a bunch of y’all here who are, in fact, teenagers. And then I feel a bit sheepish. But then I realize that 1) y’all are teenagers getting to see adults having thoughts/writing intense analyses about the harms of heteronormativity etc and 2) sometimes it’s you teens who are the ones writing these analyses! And sometimes - often - I can’t tell who’s who! And then I reflect on the fact that when I was a bit younger I def would not have had the same perceptiveness or grasp of these ideas that some of y’all have at a younger age. And then I realize that through our shared virtual space here on tumblr, this lil virtual forum, we’re sharing ideas about dismantling some of the harmful power structures of the world - such as heteronormativity - and then I think about how together, across generations, we’re working to heal the world bit by bit. And then I get emotional 😭 Big love to all y’all 💓 I really enjoy sharing space with you!

[walrus150915]

Since you liked my rambling abt my random Nimona headcanons, here's part 2

- Starting off with the queen (rip), I think her white hair is actually a wig and she has some gorgeous greying tight curls under it

- There was a thingy "the Boldheart project" which was created when Bal got accepted into the Institute's knight program. "The project" followed his progress in training to figure out if commoners were able to train as good as nobles. If he completed the course successfully, the reform would be set (sry I like talking abt fantasy politics- yea, putting responsibility on a literal child to become a figure of "equality" is... Sure a strategy)

Let's stop with the politics amirite

- Ambrosius sings in the shower. First it was like quiet humming n stuff but when him and Bal start living together this guy's shower was akin to opera (hah- soap opera- get it-)

- Ambrosius would be a type of a rich dude who fantasizes about living on his own and providing for himself and having this sweet humble suburban way of life with his husband until he actually starts living this way (he's a literal nepo baby- cmon the habits will be there even if he tries being independent)

Ambrosius: Bal, I don't get why I keep burning my bread! It's the second time I fail!

Ballister: Practice makes perfect, darling

Ambrosius: But these KitKoters make it look so easy😭😭

- He catches up gradually tho. Bal is very understanding, Nimona is having a lot of fun with this

- Does fun include bullying Ambrosius for not knowing how to remove plants to the bigger pots?. Yea kinda

- Nimona's hanging out with the kingdom's kids from time to time. She goes out of her way to make them laugh or make them feel happy in general. It heals her inner child, in a way

- Even though she hangs out with them from a perspective of a cool older shapeshifting punk sibling, she still feels like their peer and can't help but transform into her child form sometimes

- idk I think Nimona shapeshifts into a child pretty often if she feels overwhelmed or emotionally devastated or just wants to be taken care of

- Ballister does take care of her

Wow this got sad fast. Anyway

- Ambrosius is left-handed but was forced to relearn because the perfect descendant of Gloreth cannot be left-handed, it's abnormal🤓

- Ballister can't help but go 😬 when either Ambrosius or Nimona take food with their left hand while eating. Yeah technically eating with his flesh hand would be easier for him. No he won't do that for the life of him (saying hi to all Muslims out there)

- Ballister decides to grow out a real beard and Nimona thinks it's the coolest thing ever to play with during their family quality time. Ambrosius also likes this change in his looks but for rather uh... gay different reasons😁

If we're talking about gay stuff I might just as well talk abt some Goldenheart hcs

- When they've only started dating Ballister had a really difficult time with the eye contact bc Ambrosius's loving gaze was too much to handle for him. He'd see how gentle and soft his eyes are and how they're filled with complete adoration to the top and just look away all blushy and smitten

- I think we as a fandom agree that Ambrosius's love language is arm chopping physical touch. Have you considered how important kisses can be to him in expressing his love tho

- Ambrosius LOVES kissing Ballister. He's probably kissed him everywhere if you think about it-

- But yea. He steals kisses from Bal as often as he can. Boo goes to work? Kiss him goodbye. Boo gets back? Kiss him goodhi - doesn't matter where😉

- His favorite place to kiss is probably Bal's neck bc he just likes nuzzling into it and making him all flustered

- Ballister loves kissing Ambrosius as well. His favorite thing ever is press kisses into Ambrosius's hair while they're lying down on the couch, Ambrosius's head on Ballister's chest n his arms around Ballister's torso. It makes them both feel very soft and warm and safe❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

- (teenage years) You know this type thing when kittens playfully fight each other and jump onto each other and bite and stuff? Yea that's teenage Goldenheart

- (a little older than teenage years) current sparring trend in the writer part of the fandom. That's it. You know damn well what I'm talking about

- At some point their private training sessions became the reason they succeeded in combat and got the highest of marks

Okay gay stuff is over

- Nimona has some pretty dark humor but draws the line at the things that could really trigger her or other people. Joking about burning everything down? Of course. Joking about... Well... The act 3 of the movie? Nope, never

- Nate Knight (do ya remember him?) does drag in his off-duty time haha RuPaul hi

- Ballister snores in his sleep bc he's a dad like that

- Ballister also is a type of dad to sleep on the couch while watching TV, and when you turn it off he wakes up and tells you he's been watching it this whole time

- Both Nimona and Ambrosius encourage Ballister to speak his mother tongue more often bc he used to hide it at the Institute

- Nimona scrunches her nose when she tries to remember things

- Ballister snaps his fingers while remembering stuff, especially in "Huh... What's the word for..." situations (he just like me fr)

- Nimona loves biting pencils and pens but sometimes she bites too hard and they break in half or something

- I feel like her stomach is iron. This punk can eat an eraser or swallow a knife or drink lava-hot water and all she'll do is burp maybe

- After leaving the Institute Ambrosius would have one hell of existential crisis. All he's dedicated his life to for all these years were lies and propaganda, what's the purpose of his life now? He tries out as many new things as he can - baking, painting, singing, playing musical instruments, photography, even science (with Bal's help ofc) my dude has tried it all. He sometimes felt worthless bc his life had no greater purpose but Bal and Nimona would reassure him that living happily with people who love him is more than enough and that you don't have to be the greatest person ever to live the best life. Find joy in the smallest of things n stuff😌

- Ballister has found ways to renovate his arm and made a bunch of new prosthetics for different purposes. I feel like he'd use a hook as well sometimes (as I've heard from the disabled community, hook is a very comfortable aid). No I'm not talking about that one post about his prosthetic's... renovations (😳) from the fan acc I follow

On this quite interesting note I'll end the post😁

Gn!!

[the-kr8tor]

IM SO SORRY FOR NO DAILY HOBIE HC YESTERDAY MY INTERNET CRASHED FOR HOURS- ANYWAYS HERE WE GO Daily Hobie HC! More general Hobie hcs but angsty>:) (I have so much more muaha) - Hates the silent treatment. He would rather try to talk things out rather than be ignored, as it brings him back to when he was a kid. Nobody ever listened to him and often ignored him, being the most 'useless' sibling of nine. Hobie would rather you treat him like absolute shit during a fight than ignore him. Yell, insult, physical pain, was better than the silent treatment for him. - Personally, I think that Hobie had a small lotus tattoo on the back of his left shoulder, a hidden semi-colon in the front petal. Being how his childhood was, and the traumatic imagery of the riots, blood, gore, guts.. It takes a toll, especially during teenage years. Hobie almost even felt disappointed that the radioactive spider didn't kill him. He deserved it after all, didn't he? - Knows all of his siblings birthday by heart. Every time their birthdays roll around, he'll wear/do something that he remembered they liked doing as tribute. Hobie doesn't know how many are alive, or dead, but he hopes they're doing well either way. - Very desensitized to his own sorrow and grief. He grew up too fast, and suppressed it to the point where it takes him a lot to shed tears now or feel grief. It's usually just numbness. Hobie learning to get his inner child back was a slow process for sure. - For a period of time before the Spider Society and everything, Hobie truly believed he was destined to be alone. That everyone leaves in the end, and he was cursed as someone who would live, breathe, and die alone. - On top of that, his nightmares feel like constant taunts, replaying gruesome memories just to poke fun at him. Like he wasn't a good person. Like Hobie deserved to not feel any sort of warmth. That the Earth was cold, heartless and cruel. - As a teenger, Hobie distanced himself from his family as they disappeared one by one to somewhere where he didn't know. He knew where his mother went, and was devastated by her deaf. She didn't have any more love for her children, but she kept a roof over his head and took care of him, even if it was a little bit. - Hobie hates drinking, especially alone. He hates being reminded of his mothers death, like he's slowly following in her footsteps. He'll die in the same, cruel death like she did, found at the end of the glass bottle that's lifted up to his lips, the liquid burning on the way down his throat. -🐦‍⬛

That's alright!! I'm glad you're back!

Daily Hobie HC!!!

Uh oh

Sameee I hate the silent treatment too :'(

NO HE DID NOT DESERVE IT 😤😤☹️

Awww I remember everyone's bday too but not a lot of them remember mine 😞 (now u made me sad 🐦‍⬛ anon ☹️)

*Holds Hobie's hand* Let's heal our inner child together

BROOOO THIS GOT ME ULTRA SAD 😭 Y U HURT ME LOVELY? IS IT BC OF OPIN?!

Nuh uh not on my watch!

[inluvwcaitvi]

I've been with Vi and Caitlyn since 2013 and this blog is healing my inner teenager. When Arcane came out I had to actively reprogram my initial reaction of I'VE BEEN TALKING ABOUT HOW GREAT THEY ARE FOR 10 YEARS. The 2013 fandom tumblr league of legends trenches were fucking insane. I'm trying to say thank you for your blog and analyses making my heart swell with so much joy overriding that initial reaction

THIS IS SO SWEET 😭😭 tysm for this, i’m super thankful u like my blog and analyses sm and i’m rly glad you like it sm !!

ppl like us are exactly who i made this blog for !! 🙏

[dyemelikeasunset]

I’m constantly thinking about about the evolution of dom and mor

Dom:

Edgar Allen Poe -> Sleepy Bean -> Awkward Model

Morgan:

Hot Mean Girl -> Awkward Cali Girl -> Babygirl

this is so funny please 😭😭 the descriptions are taking me OUT LOL!! The middle ones are switched though hehe

Dom: Sleepy Bean > Edgar Allen Poe > Awkward Model

Mor: Awkward Cali Girl > Hot Mean Girl > Babygirl

not to get sad boi hours, but some rambling about their evolutions:

I actually realized recently that their first iterations were based on my ideas of love as a teenager, which were vague but gentle.

Their second iterations were based on the tastes of my ex who got involved with their story. Even after the breakup, I realized I ended up making Dom and Mor to match the things she liked-- Morgan was her ideal tough and forward sexy girl, while Dom encompassed a lot of her philosophies of sadomasochistic nihilism. And I think the second iteration was the darkest (and most toxic) because I was parsing my feelings from the heartbreak.

So their latest iterations are actually a little closer to their first take. Gentler, but infinitely less vague cause I'm actually the age they are (writing adults as a teen is a little wild lmao), and I've had enough love experience to know that I can do something kind and compassionate, while retaining the chemistry. It took me a long time to realize how much of her influence and preferences I had sponged, and honestly how much of that bad relationship really hurt my idea of love (she was my first, so you can imagine). My wife tells me all the time how working on Dom & Mor is healing my inner child, and I'm starting to see that

[unjust-dust]

Tag Game: 9 Favourite Characters

I was tagged by @wheresmulder - thank you bestie I LOVE doing these!!!

Also these will not be in order bc I could never decide that 😭

1. Edalyn Clawthorne (Eda The Owl Lady)

Is it because I have mommy issues and wish she was my parent instead?... No comment.

2. Tenth/Fourteenth Doctor

Made my childhood amazing, brought wonder to my world and the possibility of fucking about and finding out.

3. Gromit

Wallace & Gromit is my OG spin, but I love Gromit so much by the fact that he can say a thousand words by raising his eyebrows.

4. Wednesday Addams

It wouldn't be a favourite character list without my most recent spin - Wednesday. I have had the pleasure of watching all three incarnations of Wednesday Addams and I love that she's just unapologetically herself. Plus the fact that she's autistic coded makes my heart sing.

5. Bingo

Yes I'm a neurodivergent adult healing my inner child. I relate to Bingo a lot as I'm the younger sibling with an older sister and me and her were exactly like Bluey and Bingo as kids.

6. Gwen Stacy (Into/Across The Spiderverse)

She's a badass Spiderwoman that screams trans rights - that is all. (Plus she's a ballerina and plays drums that's fucking cool).

7. Isabelle

I love Isabelle so much that she's tattooed on me. Such a great worker and kicks ass on Smash Bros in her spare time.

8. Laszlo Cravensworth

I love that his character subverts the typical teenage vampire heartthrob and is just a british guy who loves his wife. (Also Jackie Daytona has my heart).

9. Stolas

This guy is a mess and I love him.

"That's the sound of a F*CKING divorce!" - 10/10

Okay I tag: @edenyrail @discoerysimum @fictionalized-lesbian @postingthroughit @queenelvendork @im-a-fairytale and anyone who wants to do this too!

[beesandfigs-abandoned]

15 people, 15 questions

Thank you for tagging me @ozais-lobotomist 💕

1. Are you named after anyone?

One of my aunts on my dad’s side that I haven’t seen or heard from in ages lol

2. When was the last time you cried?

Sometime today 💀

3. Do you have kids?

One and done lmao

4. What sports do you play/have you played?

I played soccer in elementary and tennis in high school. I wish I could still play tennis, but I use the little bit of free time I have to draw lol.

5. Do you use sarcasm?

Only when it’s called for 😭

6. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Every and any detail of their face.

7. What’s your eye color?

A mix of brown/hazel

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Both? I don’t like gore, but I love a good psychological thriller. And happy endings heal my inner sad teenage self 😂😭

9. Any talents?

Drawing, I guess… and I used to sing a little before I started smoking and now I sound like the chocolate lady from SpongeBob (edit: I can play Mary had a little lamb on the keyboard lmao)

10. Where were you born?

The states, unfortunately

11. What are your hobbies?

Drawing, playing interactive fiction games, and video games with my gremlin, and I just took up reading again.

12. Do you have any pets?

Nope

13. How tall are you?

5’3” (Big T coded)

14. Favorite subject in school?

All of the electives. Hated general subjects with a burning passion and still do (helping the kiddo out with homework is a nightmare lol)

15. Dream job?

I don’t dream of labor, but if I could just draw for the rest of my life and not have to worry about dying if I don’t make money, I’d be happy

Tagging: @rebelrayne @justtuesdays @mrsbsmooth @longbobmckenzie @antie23 @kyeopta20 @sparxaf @perfectlysunny02 and anyone else who wants to 💕

[rrxnjun]

(im really stupid but i hope u like this fanletter 😭)

hello <3 this is for my favourite writer on tumblr; to the the same writer who does not realise how much their works could mean to someone, the lovely @rrxnjun 🎀 !!!

so, i found your blog at the beginning ot this month– november, 2023, and now that the month's about to end, i have nearly finished reading all your nct works.

to me, this month is the most special one of this year. why? because i found your blog, your stories– some pieces of your mind. i found you through one of those nct fanfic recs, 'take the stairs - njm' being the first work i read from you. it was sweet, it made me happy. and then i read the other two parts of the 'simplify romance' series, which will always hold a special place in my heart.

this year has been the worst for me, with no one for me to lean on to, weird identify crisis shit, and losing myself in this tiring process of growing up. but you know what? you saved 2023 for me. when no one's words could speak to me, yours did. you make me feel a little less lonely.

im a silly teenager, who never read sad/mainly angsty stories before i found you because i was scared, i was confident i'd cry. and i did. i gathered the courage to read angst only because you'd written it, and it was so worth it. ive stayed up so many nights this month just to read your works in peace and privacy, hidden from my family, and then spend the days thinking about how you literally create art, and telling my bestfriends about it. you are blessed. you are phenomenal. no amount of thank yous or i love yous could be enough for me to express my gratitude. you've made me feel so at peace with my thoughts sometimes and you've made me feel like i'm not alone. you have magic in your hands. i owe you so much, i wish i could gift you something, but sadly im still a minor and theres a few years until i finish uni and then get a job, and then i promise i'll get you something, because i am so lucky to be able to read your stories for free. you deserve so much more than followers, likes and reblogs. each one of your fics have made me tear up and all of them are too special for me.

this month ive read all of your nct dream '00 line fics, and my favourite was 'happier than ever' which i finished a week ago— AND I SWEAR THAT FIC DESTROYED ME 😭😭😭 it had me bawling my eyes out for two hours on a school night i love it so so fucking much, i literally think about it daily and i told all my friends about it and im so in love with it, please tell me, for my inner peace that renjun and the reader ended up getting together and being fine because im gonna cry over it for the rest of my life IDC IF THEY DIDNT END UP TOGETHER please lie to me and tell me they did 💔💔💔💔💔😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

i want you to know, and to remember this whenever you feel even a little like giving up— you have magic, bar, don't ever let go of that magic.

your stories make me want to heal and to help everyone heal. to be loved and to love everyone. to be cared for and care for everyone. your magic helps me survive my days with a little smile. thank you so much for everything you've done for me, without realising you're helping me live.

every single word i wrote here– i swear on everything i have, i genuinely mean it. you are the best thing that happened this year :) i hope that one day someone will love you as much as i love your blog.

(me when i talk about your work)

P.S. permission to take a screenshot of your blog and paste it to my scrapbook by which i can remember my teenage years that your stories mended, please?

thank you for reading, ily ❤️

- your biggest fan (hopefully no one's more dedicated!!) 💘

when i saw this in my inbox i got so emotional i couldnt reply immidiately because i genuinely wanted to sob. this is so so sweet and it mustve taken a long time to type out and i appreciate you a WHOLE lot, not only for this, but also for supporting me sm over the last month. :,)

take the stairs is a very sweet and fun fic and i am glad you found my blog through this one, haha. the simplify romance series holds my favorite fics and i PROMISE to finish jeno's entry at the beginning of the next year!! it HAS to be done. it means a lot to me that you took the time of your day to read my works and that you enjoyed them so much to let me know.

i am happy to hear that my work could help you through some hard times. as a reader on this platform as well, i do know that feeling very well and i could never imagine being that person to someone, but i am glad my words could be there for you when no one else could. hearing this makes all the effort feel worth it, and it's something i'll think of whenever im having a hard time with my work again. i also hope life is nicer to you in the future, and if you ever need someone, my inbox is always open.

having my fics be called art is something i never imagined could happen. it's beyond what i think about my work, but i am honored to hear this compliment, truly. despite being a writer i cant find the words to express my gratitude towards you and your supportive words right now >:( it does mean the whole entire world to me. please do NOT worry about "paying me back" or something, i do this because it's what i love doing and sharing my work with others makes me happy, so an ask like this is more than enough for me. you made me feel really appreciated and i will remember and treasure your kind words forever.

happier than ever is definitely a heavier read, since it's partly from personal experience, hh. i tend to project on renjun a lot so take this as a warning for my other renjun fics LMAO. TT this fic has a special place in my heart and hearing you talk so highly about it makes me all warm on the inside hhhhh my love langugage is words of affirmation stop this or ill cry. i enjoy leaving my fics open-ended to interpretation of the reader, so whatever you feels fits their story is how the story ends for you. <3

i will definitely use this ask as a reminder to not give up when i feel like doing so. it really brought me a lot of strength :) thank you for calling my writing magic. i never imagined someone describing it that way, but it does feel good to hear haha

knowing that my work helped somebody and made them heal and feel all sorts of emotions inside makes me feel at peace. thank you so much. SO much.

also u really make me want to bawl with that scrapbook comment. cant believe im an important part of someone's teenage years :((

once again, words cant express how much this means to me. thank you and i hope my fics continue to be a source of good things for you :) i will think of this often. ily

[kay9leo]

Thoughts on Inside Out 2 & Sebastian's Mind

After watching the movie, I'm honestly convinced that Anxiety is in charge of Sebastian's control board and managed to hook his Joy into it (along with Anger) and now almost all the emotions are following whatever plan Anxiety has. Especially Joy considering his endless optimism of finding a cure.

Oh and Anxiety's became more powerful when he got Slytherin's book and relic before it's control was taken away by Sadness at the end of his quest.

Poor boy never had a chance against Anxiety 😭

ALSO YOU SHOULD WATCH INSIDE OUT 2 😁

IT WILL MAKE YOU FEEL THINGS! 😭😫😅😄

---Slight SPOILERS ON Inside Out 2 MOVIE Review---

READ AT YOUR OWN RISK

...

...

...

The movie felt like it projected my teen self out on the screen with Riley as a placeholder. It was horrifyingly filled with second-hand embarrassment but that's what also made it so great and does a decent job on projecting Anxiety and how to deal with it as well as what it means to be human.

PIXAR YOU DONE IT AGAIN

Now I'm going to go be cringe somewhere else and let those memories filled with those awkward angst emotions fade away 😭... that or bring them up to use in story-telling one day in the future. 😂

But man, did my teenage-self made a comeback of memories (with awkward ones as well) I thought had vanished behind the trauma that came with my young adulthood/20s 😭😭😭

Nope. Teenage me is still very alive inside of me and now my adult self has to calm her down and reassure her/healing my inner-child/teen and use all that psych tips I learned as a young adult and in therapy that allowed me to be at peace with my emotions/self.

[nightmaresonelmstreet]

I made one post about a Jeff the killer movie and now my entire recommended page is just creepypasta stuff, this app really wants me to heal my inner teenager ig 😭😭

[shifting-with-august]

do you think it would be ok to age yourself down to like 16 but make everyone mentally and physically an adult? so everyone would have the maturity and body of an adult but you’d still be able to experience your dr as a teen again?

With regard to aging down in DRs, I know it can be controversial primarily because there are some people wanting to age themselves down with the intention of dating someone younger like minors. And that's a valid concern because aging down with that intent isn't a good thing.

However, in your case, as long as your intent is to simply experience being a teen again in that DR, presumably doing some fun things you've never done here or to heal your inner child, that may be alright. I've seen some other shifters say that they've done it to heal their inner child. Some didn't have great childhood so they're shifting to experience a better one.

In making everyone physically and mentally an adult, you'd be able to do some teenage things while seeing through a much better lens because of your mental maturity (perhaps being able to properly discern the good things and the bad and the consequences of your actions). With your matured mentality, you may be able to properly weigh between the possible outcomes of your actions and presumably your choices will be much better than what you've chosen before. Meanwhile, with your adult body, you'd probably be able to move with much more strength I guess and depending on what you actually intend to use your body for. This somehow made me think of some tv shows and movies where the characters are supposed to be teenagers but they don't actually think and act like one 😭

Personally, I really haven't encountered this concern myself since I haven't really thought of aging myself down for my DRs. But if you do, I hope you do it responsibly and enjoy being a teenager again while being able to make choices that are actually well thought of. I have nothing against it as long as the intentions are not problematic like the one I've stated before.

I hope what I've said makes sense and will be helpful as well.

Since this is something I'm not familiar with (in a sense that I haven't thought much about this in the past), I'd appreciate if there are other shifters who can share their thoughts on this. :)

[webginz]

ARGH just remembered the motherfucker that ruined my 30$ hamster squishy and didnt pay me back or anything. MY FAMILY WAS GOING THROUGH HARD TIMES THAT WAS A LOT OF MONEY!! AND THAT RICH TEENAGE BOY RUINED IT AND DIDNT CARE!!! i had such bad social anxiety that when he asked to borrow it i couldnt say no and he ruined it! it was imported from japan. i just found the remnants while cleaning my room. i hope that kid killed himself fr. he knew what he was doing, it was a mental health treatment group.. he was there for being evil. ugh.

i think im gonna buy a new one to heal my inner child or whatever.. i think they are cheaper now.

😭😭😭