#my inner child is EXTREMELY pleased rn | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

hauntedkkitty · 2 years ago

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hi systems of tumblr i need Help. i am a questioning system and i have been for a long while now and idfk what to do or think anymore

i cannot talk to any sort of therapist / psychologist about this, so please give me any assistance you can even if its just "this sounds like ____" / "this relate to this and i have ___" / ANYTHING please

warning i dump some of my trauma here but i also put red text that just gives a summary without heavy desc so you can skip the description if you dont want to be triggered or upset.

tw child abuse, mentions of death / injury

basic info about me that may or may not relate

- i am a minor with cptsd & autism

- i have a Lot of repetitive trauma. like i dont wanna traumadump it all rn but a Lot.

- i am disabled

- all my older relatives are all shitty people which i cannot ask for help with this. all my younger relatatives would not be able to help. there is no one who i trust enough to help me with this So hiiii anon tumblr blog here i am

-i have not wanted to live for as long as i can remember [and i can remember very far back].

- i had a lot of periods in my childhood where i go Blank for a while, like, memory wise. i would "wake up" somewhere else the middle of an action and have no idea what was going on or why i was there. or felt out of control of my body, i dont know if this has lessened or if i have just grown used to the feeling if that makes sense

- i am psychotic. i have been since i was little and i know how to deal with it now and do not have any Serious delusions or hallucinations anymore

-ive been questioning whether or not im a system for a Long while now but i never get far with it because i literally cannot figure myself out.

- i do not feel i have a real personality

- i dissociated a Lot in childhood and even now.

- i feel like shit went Wrong when i was meant to develop into a normal person and i am now fundamentally fucked

- i have done a Lot of research of osdd/did [and disorders in general] on and off for some years and have never found a conclusion for myself Help me

trauma dump about my experience with possible alter - scroll to red text if you are triggered by: religious trauma, suicide mention / suicidal thoughts

when i was a child [this is abt when i was around 8] i was heavily in denial about the fact that i wanted to die.

i knew my parents [abusive] would react Badly and also i was religious and raised to believe i would burn in hell for it so i just Refused to admit that i hated living.

one day i saw it on the news with my parents [it was some headline like "suicide rates rising" or sum idfk sorry] and my mother said "who would be crazy enough to try and kill themselves" and she wanted an answer back so i said "haha yeah..." and i heard a voice behind me [like Right in my ear behind me] say "you would" [as in you would be crazy enough]

this was not an auditory hallucination. i did not have voice hallucinations at the age and it was extremely different to anything i have ever experienced.

and i was fucking terrified cause as previously mentioned i was raised religious and thought this was a demon trying to tempt me into sin and holy fuck there was a creepy girl whispering my deepest darkest most sinful of secrets in my ears

the voice whispered more into my ear about my inner workings and thoughts and stuff i was in denial of

i have no clue if this makes sense but when i heard its voice i saw like a Flash of info about it. like when you suddenly remember something and the whole memory just Vwoops into your brain? some physical traits and some personality traits, along with the fact that this thing Knows me deeply and knows everything about me?

i looked behind me and asked my mother if she said anything and she said no and gave me a weird look.

i never mentioned anything to anyone because i was convinced they would hurt me if i did.

i felt its presence in the back of my mind [it didnt speak often but even when silent i could feel its presence like the way you know when someones staring at you].

i kept refusing it and saying i did not want it and ignoring it everytime possible and eventually i felt it fade [not the right word but idk wtf to say. it went In or it just disapeared or something]. i felt kind of at a loss when it happened cause i didnt know what to do.

i considered the idea that it was trying to help me but even if it was i had no clue what it was.

TLDR: 8ish yrs old. i was in denial about my mental issues. i heard a voice in my ear very clearly wording out my mental issues in a way i could not. freaked the fuck out and ignored it even though i felt its presence for like a month and eventually i stopped feeling it there. no clue what that was

i told a system blog this experience once and they suggested that i look into bpd & aspd and that they dont know what to say as theyd never heard of something like that happening so young before

since then i have been never heard the voice behind me or any other solid voice. i dont know if it was an alter who went dormant or just some weird dream or hallucination or what.

i ignored it for all my childhood because i was scared. at some point a few years ago [covid times] i felt something similar again, not a voice but Something and i felt the immense need to try and figure it out. i did a Lot of work and all i could figure out was that voice probably Was trying to help me in some way. i was heavily in denial about most of my trauma and mental illness until like a few years ago because my family basically cult brainwashed me Haha.

also also i have had a lot of times where i have not felt Myself but have also still been there. its hard to word but i was still There watching myself do things and if i Really wanted i could try and stop my body from moving but like.... I didnt feel like i was Alone in my brain if that makes sense??? bru idk its that Feeling that someone else is there thing again.

trauma dump warning if you are triggered by: phys abuse [by father] mention, desc of me fearing my abuser would kill me scroll to red text

a time like this that stands out a lot is when i was younger [9+ -14] and my dad had just hit me and yelled at me and he pushed me down and i nearly hit my head on the stone kitchen counter but i just missed it and i was struck with this horrible fear because what would have happened if i did hit my head? i would probably be seriously injured. ive hurt myself on there before and it wasnt even that bad then but i still needed to go to the hospital. would i have died if i hit my head then? is he going to kill me now? and i was filled with so much fear i couldnt move and i had no idea how i would get out of this. i was literally backed into a corner. i completely spaced out.

i felt myself kinda Snap back in my mind for a second like idk how to phrase it but my mind Changed and all of a sudden i had a clear plan like Streamlined to my head and all emotion and desires other than SURVIVE were pushed out And like i felt So out of it and disorientated and ouguhhhhh felt weird bru idk how to word this shit was Odd and moving my body felt weird.

i saw myself run upstairs and check for injuries and try to clean up nd fix body but i did not feel like i was moving ??? like i was Out Of It and my body was just taking care of itself and i was just There like what is happening. OH I SORT OF HEARD A VOICE AGAIN HERE BUT IT WAS MORE LIKE. sudden dominant thought than voice in my ear voice. it was just telling me what to do and questioning if i had bandaids in my room.

TLDR: a time that stands out is when i was younger [9>14], i was being abused and nearly had a serious injury which i slimly avoided and was frozen with fear and spaced out. i suddenly felt myself snap back into place, disorientated and completely Weird, and felt thoughts [a plan to get out] that were not mine. i did not feel fully in control of my body and like i was being fed another persons thoughts as i saw my body tried to help itself. i felt like another persons thoughts were dominating over mine and all in all Strange.

anyway i kinda got back into myself after i was mostly taken care of but i was still Not Fully There if that makes sense??? like i still wasnt responding or thinking or talking or moving ANYTHING like what i usually do and i was aware of this and i was really confused about it and what was going on

sorry if this is worded wrong i wrote most of this late at night and again im autistic and get misinterpreted a lot and also my memory is kinda fucked up

anyways if anyone could could shed any light on this in literally anyway you could i would be super grateful.

ALSO if you think this is some form of osdd/did/plural thing Please tell me how to speak to the people in my head cause idk its weird like this i would like to know what is happening in there and not feel like im suddenly being possessed or like im insane

#questioning system #dissociative identity disorder #other specified dissociative disorder #osdd #system #did osdd #osdd system #did system #system help #plurality #dear GOD please show up in the tags #sorry if im using the wrong tags or terms or anything #im not used to tumblr

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rinoomi · 3 years ago

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tw vent?

okay so. i was at my peak when I posted those suna fanarts. like that's when my acc grew the most? i truly appreciate all of the support!

now, I haven't drawn him in a very long time (not just him but I haven't really drawn for the hq fandom in a while) this isn't me falling out of love w hq or the chars or anythING like that! I have noticed that I grow more as an artist when I indulge in and draw for other fandoms. this way I get to draw chars with unique character design? I also get insanely burnt out when I draw the same character over again and again. there are many artblogs that are dedicated to one fandom alone or like drawing for one specific character but that's something I can never get myself to do. I once did exactly that and it costed me a huge art account that was once my pride and joy (I abandoned it 2 years ago btw,, drew for a specific fandom for 3 years until one day I just couldn't?) I don't want to repeat that mistake ever again because I didn't just lose the acc but it also made me fall out of love w the fandom?

ever since that incident I've never been hard on myself or forced myself into drawing for one specific fandom, if I start feeling even a little iffy or get that whole "awhh shi wait am I drawing to satisfy the ppl who follow me on here?" feeling, I just stop. and go draw for other fandoms, indulge in other things etc. also noticed that I get into artblocks a lot when I'm continously focused on drawing for one fandom?

lmao drink water when you read the word 'fandom' 💀

I don't know where I was going w this but anyway- all i want to say is! its okay. its okay to draw for other fandoms. don't ever feel pressurised to keep producing content for one specific fandom just because you want to please your followers/friends or want to grow your acc. because hun we both know thats not gonna help you grow. acc? maybe yeah but that's not the growth I'm talking of rn. and you know exactly what i mean. AND it's okay when the current fandom you're making content for doesn't get you the attention, appreciation, love your old works used to get. don't get discouraged. (I'm speaking to my inner child here shhhhh)

just wanted to get this out because I feel like- nono not just feel I'm speaking from experience here hdjdjdjdj that many artists feel extremely pressurised to keep serving for one fandom. (like I said earlier there are MANY artblogs that draw for one specific fandom and theyve done it for years and grown which is amazing honestly!! this whole thing isn't targeted towards them. I'm only referring to the ones who feel like they're restricted or bound to produce content for a specific fandom)

okay what is this even 🥲 hdjdjsjs this is just how I talk inside my head I'm soo sorry if you had to read this 😭

#no idea what this is #just wanted to get it off my chest!#ugh I hate opening up so might delete it later #stfu fir

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analyzingadventure · 3 years ago

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GG Episode 17, Icy Hell, let’s gooo

It’s really fitting to watch this episode when we are getting an absolute fuckton of snow right now lmao

Ghost Game said Save The Planet, hell yeah

Seriously though, hot damn Kiyocchin is a child genius

No one can hear you scream in a Geothermal Power Plant (when you’re all alone)

GAMMAMON IS COLD, BABY NOOO ;A;

Oh, to be warmed up by Angoramon... Livin’ the dream

This is delightfully horrific lmao

Bro, Ruri was so fast making that shelter for herself (also her hands should totally be freezing rn from the digging)

This really is like, Alien but with Digimon and for kids

ANGORAMON IS STARTING TO FREEZE TOO? OH NO

They should just go in a big cuddle pile instead of having the kids rely on Angoramon alone... Betel and Tesla are warm-ish too I’m sure

GAMMAMON DEVOLVED, OH NO

OH NO

(RIP Gammamon)

OH THIS IS REALLY GRIM Y’ALL, OH NO

LIKE I KNOW THEY’LL BE FINE BUT OH NO

Oh this is grim and dark

Tesla please don’t slap Ruri, you could behead the girl if you’re not careful

oH SHIT OH SHIT THEY’RE CROSS COMBATIBLE?! RURI CAN TEAM UP WITH TESLA? OH SHIT THAT’S FUCKING COOL

THAT’S SO COOL, Y’ALL, I’M-- LIKE I’VE REALLY WANTED SOMETHING LIKE THIS TO BE EXPLORED IN CANON BUT I NEVER EXPECTED THEY’D ACTUALLY FUCKING DO IT, HOLY SHIT

GIRL POWER, HELL YEAH

That was a fun episode, like, it was unnececarily dark considdering there were no like concequences for what happened in the episode, but man IT WAS FUN, my inner Edge Lord is extremely pleased

Preiew! OH HELL YEAH, HELL YEAH PETERMON, LET’S GO ANIME DEBUT FOR PETERMON!!

#Ghost Game #GG Reaction

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keepyourpantsongohan · 6 years ago

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Ayesha Liveblogs Naruto Shippuden S21

What a tender intro omg also why is this filler so well animated

The introduction of modern technology will never not be funny to me. Kakashi on a laptop. Gaara sending emails. What has the ninja world come to

I know it’s just superfluous background motion but that angry little cat design was amazing. Takes me tf out

Hello again New English Iruka Voice time to feel slightly uncomfortable

Doesn’t Inuyasha have a monopoly on this baby with a red ball imagery

Why! Is! No one! Making sure! Naruto is fed! He’s a baby!!!!!!

Naruto and Sasuke were such adorable children my heart

SOMEONE PLEASE EXPLAIN THE FAMILY WHERE ONE OF THE CHILDREN IS JUST A FROG? WHO IS DOING THESE BACKGROUND ANIMATIONS?????

In case you thought I wasn’t being literal:

[Accompanying dialogue to this image: “Did you hear the rumours that Lord Fourth died because of him?” WHO IS THIS FROG CHILD WITH A VENDETTA AGAINST MINATO]

This ninja cowboy music seems slightly misplaced but okay

Hiruzen. U r the literal ninja president. Naruto is foraging in the forest for food bc no one is taking care of him! How r u like ‘Hahah I’m hungry too :D’

“The things that we inconsequential humans worry about are often very petty indeed” “You’re right” It’s Philosophy Hours ft. Pre-Schoolers

“Are you sure these mushrooms are safe to eat? “Won’t know ‘til we eat ‘em” HIRUZEN PICK UP THE PHONE

SCREAMS FIVE YEAR OLD NARUTO JUST JUMPED OFF THE HOKAGE MONUMENT AHHHHHH

I miss Neji :((((((((((((((((

“Please make sure that you look after Neji” show us Neji’s mum you cowards!!!

“You have to be more positive, and confident!” Nejiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii my boy

“I wish that I could switch places with you, big brother” There’s a lot to unpack here and I’m wildly concerned about all of it. This episode ought to be titled Konoha Desperately Requires Child Welfare Programs

Making an mini-episode which largely depicts Neji’s tragic backstory and centring its ending on Hinata seems like an odd angle to take

“I’m alone. I don’t have anyone, but I never cry” NARUTOOOOO

KJHFKJHG THIS NINJA BASEBALL OUTRO I LOVE IT

SASUKE USING HIS SHARINGAN TO CHEAT AT BASEBALL I WHEEZE

Also not that I don’t like Genma but why is he a central figure in this ending. Has he had more than a single conversation with Naruto in his life

Lmao @ Sasuke and Itachi’s child versions going back to having their adult voices. Pick a lane SP!!!

“Things in season are always cheap and tasty” “Oh, is that so, Sasuke? Hahaha” Sasuke learning about the ninja economy

“We’re going to visit your mother’s family” Two questions: 1) Aren’t your families the same family (eep) and 2) Don’t they all live in the same part of the village

90% of this dialogue is recycled from prior episodes except delivered more slowly and it’s a little confusing

Itachi sure knows a lot about cooking for an eleven-year-old

Sasuke being a clumsy child is such a cute character detail ahhhh I love him so much 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

“[Confused laughter] You want to be like me?” What a Mood Itachi

Sakura’s hideout in the woods is so sweet yes 2 semi-normal childhoods

Poor little Sakura already concerned about her appearance they never let girls live do they

“You’re really cute Sakura, don’t hide it” Ino and Sakura are the most adorable children in the WORLD I love their relationship 4ever

“If she’s cute like you say, then I would love to meet her” who will stop all men

“But Ino, aren’t you good friends with Sakura?” “No, not really” Okay not to project but. I have a lot of thoughts on this narrative

GASP Inner Sakura’s first appearance!!

Tiny Team 7 is all I need in the world honestly I would watch a whole show that was just those three growing up

I have only just now noticed Suigetsu as third baseman. This ninja baseball game and season in general raise so many questions

Noooo Gaara don’t cry you are gonna be so loved in the future

Rasa, can I just say, from the bottom of my heart, I’m going to yeet you into the sun

“When I look up at the sky, the pain inside my heart feels a little bit better” He’s like 4!!!!!!! >:(

“Instead of a mother, you get to have me, Lord Gaara” Yashamaru: Self-Diagnosed Mumncle

Ngl baby Gaara’s recollection of Karura is nothing like she looked like

I really don’t care for this new Iruka voice I just keep listening to him like ‘that’s not the sound of Naruto’s dad!!’

I will admit him spooking the sleeping children was cute I don’t know why I always find that so funny kjhgkjhg

“Let me buy into this fight” who taught seven-year-old Naruto to gamble

Christ alive the implication that Naruto has been doing the sexy jutsu since he was seven who will put this boy in ninja therapy

If Orochimaru had just continued to be Jiraiya’s long-suffering friend he might be half-endearing but alas he is fecal matter personified

“Come on out, I made plenty, so you might as well stay and eat” Hjgjfjgfgffg I’m not sure what’s funnier about this scene the implication that Obito and Rin both independently followed Kakashi home without noticing each other, or that Kakashi did notice and rather than question this turn of events was just like “Guess I should make more fish”

“When you’re older, do you think you’ll become a chef” I would pay to see the AU where Kakashi becomes a professional chef why couldn’t that have been his Road to Ninja persona

Ngl I spent the first half of Kakashi’s minisode wondering if Sakumo was dead or simply too depressed to take care of Kakashi and I think dead is the less upsetting outcome

“It’s no fun when you’re not around, Kakashi” Obitooooooooooooooo

I’m not saying it’s suspicious that Sakumo is given two different depictions of his grave site in the anime but Sakumo fucked an alien and I stand by that statement

All I remember from Sasuke Shinden is that a character called Sasuke “Sassy” as a nickname and if they do that in the Eng dub I won’t survive

“[Deep sigh] Alright Sakura, what is it?” Fhfjhfkjh what’s your damage Kakashi can’t your kids come to visit when people start exploding

God Sakura and Ino’s relationship is the realest.... she went to the Hokage bc her gal was worried abt her family friend and then comforted her from her loss... the looooooooove

Hinata not to devalue your work in any way but why did u collapse after poking one (1) man in the chakra point isn’t gentle fist based in taijutsu

Fhjfhkjhf I’ve seen that gif before of Kakashi knowing that Sakura was thinking about Sasuke but it’s still funny

Sasuke just hanging in the woods with kittycats what kinda redemption journey is this lmao

Ehehehe I’m still not over the fact that Sasuke recognizes Sai’s jutsu and Kakashi uses it to communicate like there are six members of team 7 and this arc PROVES IT HELL YEAH

I can’t believe I forgot the circus ninja oh my god

“There’s good money to be found for performers like us” MOVE OVER EXPLODING HUMANS WHERE’S MY EPISODE ABOUT THE NINJA CIRCUS

Everyone always commenting on the pupils and sclera of the Hyuga and Uchiha but nobody caring about Old Man Demon Eyes from the Bamboo Village:

You’d think at this point no amount of genjutsu could traumatize Sasuke

They’re leaning wholeheartedly into the ninja cowboy music

That is not how I thought they would pronounce “Sassy” this show is full of twists and turns

“What about reviving the Uchiha clan? You’re the lone survivor right?” said Chino, inquiring about when Sasuke was planning to have vaginal sex

“You really think you’re going to find him inside that seriously scary looking cave?” GASP IT’S TENZO TIME

AIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIE IT’S MY BOYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

“You’re Sasuke, right?” asked Yamato, as if Sasuke had not provided the memorable introduction of stabbing a seasoned ANBU in the shoulder as a sixteen-year-old during a dramatic reunion with his team

“It would be easier for us to keep things coordinated, if you sent us progress reports as you went...” Okay not to be that gal but I love that Tenzo and Kakashi are an “us” in this mini-lecture about how Sasuke should call his father (Kakashi) more often

P sure that’s Yamato’s last speaking role goodbye sweet man we knew ye well

“So does this mean that you trust me?” GO TO JAIL OROCHIMARU

Every time that Orochimaru touches Sasuke I want to leap through the screen you leave that boy alone!!! Go! To! Jail!

Sasuke having to explain his social life to Taka is a dynamic I never knew I needed. What more do I want from Naruto than frames like this:

"By showing everyone that Sasuke isn’t in the Hidden Leaf Village and that he’s still out journeying around the world, it reduces the possibility that the village will be harmed” “So are you saying that Sasuke has to keep travelling forever” “That might be so” I can’t believe the entirety of Taka came up with a better explanation for Sasuke staying outside Konoha than Kishimoto himself

“Compared to me, the likelihood that Kabuto will return to evil is extremely low”

He still helped kill......... 40,000 people????? Okay dude

I CAN’T BELIEVE OROCHIMARU IS ACKNOWLEDGING HE IS STILL EVIL!!!! GO TO JAIL!!

I’m gonna pretend I don’t see Tenzo following Stranger Danger and he’s on vacation on a beach where he belongs

Fhjkhfkjhfkj what’s the meaning of this Orochimaru you’ve looked the same since you were 25:

Sasuke: No. She’s older than I am

Orochimaru: [Soft gasp] What?

Man I remember vaguely Sasuke being involved in this fight based on the Tenzo novel scene later on but hoo boy I do not like this

SCREAMMMM TENZO TRYING TO PROTECT PPL IN THE AREA HE’S HELPING

“I can’t make direct contact with him, so I better go now” I hope it is because you filed a restraining order, Yamato

“To increase the rarity, what I’ve even done is, had all but one person in a clan killed” at this point En Oyashiro is just trying to bait Sasuke

God I love how righteous Sasuke is being rn like this is the kind of dismantling of oppression I wanted for him instead of sad murder times

This battle is bonkers:

Villain: Looks like you brought a sword to a dodgeball fight

Sasuke: Looks like you brought a dodgeball to a magic eyes fight!!

Well I certainly breezed past this part of Sasuke Shinden hello Fushin

I find it hard to believe that anyone but Naruto could best Sasuke rn

I keep joking that those eyes in the sky look like Tenzo but I’m right and I should say it

What a long, drawn-out and slightly suspicious backstory for Chino (looking at you, Fushin of two personality types)

“But now you’re still able to travel freely... and that is all because you have people who love and protect you” Team 7 cutaway with closeups of Sakura and Naruto, Narusasusaku game strong

“For the Leaf’s nourishment, your entire clan was absorbed by your village’s Roots” wow what a shitty time for such an excellent pun

Unbelievable kkhkjhfk and by this I mean completely believable:

Chino: Please explain your change of heart re: village corruption

Sasuke: I got a boyfriend

Unbelievable x2:

Chino: KILL ME

Sasuke: Consider this.... you have.... boy who is friend. Good enough

Chino: Wow Sasuke, you’re right

Lmao @ Kakashi proudly announcing that Sasuke is about to enter an unsanctioned jutsu fight in a bet to free enslaved people how did this letter go “Dear Hokage-dad-Kakashi, I am writing to inform you...”

Even funnier: If Tenzo wrote the letter bc Sasuke is shite at contacting people: “Dear Kakashi-senpai, Brace yourself to be worried and proud—”

“Are you Sasuke’s...” yes Chino, whatever the end of that sentence is, you’re correct

Huh I could’ve sworn at least a good chunk of these freed people go to the Leaf. I didn’t make that conversation up. I have discussed it many times!!! My poor Tenzo cut out for more logical story lines I guess

Omggggggg the Raikage is telling Sasuke about Naruto’s most vulnerable Sasuke moment..... the love!!! Is this the only reason they invited A lmao

En Oyashiro joining Rasa and Hiashi in the Bad Dad Club

I’ve said this before but Naruto and Sakura going on a date to talk about Sasuke is the most legit representation for their relationship I’ve ever seen that’s it that’s what them dating would be like

“You’re just like a one man police force” lol @ them cutting out the fact that Sakura said this bc Sakura’s not allowed to have individual connections to Sasuke and also just like....... how much Sasuke still wants to be a cop kjhgkjhgk baby stop

I’ve belatedly realized that Kakashi types to the beat of the intro music and it makes me giggle

“The adult world can be complicated” is that ur way of saying ‘nepotism’ Kakashi

“I’m startin’ to get a belly” “I don’t want to hear about all that” PLS

“You two are really the only ones who are special to me” aw Shikamaru

That slap was A Lot, Temari, surely there are better ways to tell Shikamaru you want him to be your boyfriend

“You don’t really think that Sai has—” “Well, he is very innocent.”

Kakashi about Sai: He’s the baby of the family

Sai: I’m the oldest and most experienced of all the youth???

Kakashi: I mark ur ages by when I got you xoxo ur legal age is 3

I’m not sure that that’s the intonation I expected for Hinoko but I guess that’s on me for stereotyping teen girls hahah

“That’s my ninja way” “Our ninja way” I feel like this is shinobi flirtation

The outro with Little Team 7 fading to Big Team 7... I have but one heart

Also the implication that they took a photo immediately post war jhgkjhgkj. Kakashi still has a barely healed stab wound and twenty years of trauma. Sasuke and Naruto both just lost an arm. Also who brought a camera to the battlefield. Who took this picture. (Tenzo waking up from a 224 episode coma: We gotta take a family photo)

“You might consider yourself a member of Team 7, but I wonder if they think the same of you” [Naruto voice] Believe it!!!!!!

“If we just kill the lookouts, it’ll be like easy to get past the checkpoint” okay calm down Soku

Lmao Shikamaru struggling to deal with rebellious teens jhghjkg why are the anime episodes I watch so fitting to my own life

Man not to get 2 real it’s fucked up that Soku fears peace wyd militarism

I don’t really believe that Soku is deserting the village but it’s a good tactic

[Panning to the bird scene at the beginning of this arc] We call that foreshadowing

Komori’s judgement seems to be clouded by his lowkey crush on Soku

“I’ve just been having these really bizarre dreams lately” that’s PTSD Shikamaru

“Feudal lords are always [tyrants] no matter where you go” then why.... do you have.... feudalism.......... [Tobirama screams in the afterlife]

Not to judge these guys so much but like.... ur ANBU and a veteran ninja surely you should have a disguise after faking your death??????? Kakashi, Iruka, what shinobi standards are you teaching exactly?? U didn’t even change ur hairstyles???

“Something similar happened to me as well” what are you... are you talking about when you pretended to be asleep during the Chunin exams because that’s not the same thing as sleeping under a pile of corpses Shikamaru

NOOOOOOOOOO SAI WHY ARE THEY HANGING MY ANGEL FROM A CRUCIFIX

AHHHHHHH I don’t like seeing Sai like this, Kakashi’s right he’s a baby!!

“Let’s just say I’ve found the place where I belong” Fhdjskhfksjhf this is definitely Root Code for something because Kakashi uses this line on Tenzo in his Tsukuyomi dream

“Then why didn’t Naruto come to get me? You and I have never been particularly close, so why were you the one who came here?” LMAO SAI ‘you’re not on my list of eligible rescuers Shikamaru 😒😒😒😒’

“Fret not, to me this is but a trifle” said Ro, lying prostrate on the ground in between groans of pain (same)

I mean... Gengo makes some pretty compelling arguments abt the shinobi system

“The alliance of nations that the Leaf is currently a part of... is only going to maintain a dark, tenuous peace” I mean... Gengo’s right even if he is a dick

“Lord Hokage told me everything... and I had a hell of a time getting it out of him too” “I don’t want to know what you did... I don’t even want to imagine it” JHGKJHGKJHG I WANNA SEE TEMARI INTERROGATING A FORMER ANBU, KAGE-LEVEL NINJA I LOVE IT

Wait are these last twelve outros dedicated to each of the rookie teams + Team Guy bc that would be adorable

JHGJHGGHGJHG DO WE ACTUALLY GET TO SEE TEMARI YELL AT KAKASHI

Update from 3 seconds later: We don’t but Kakashi’s “Euh?” sound as she knocks down his door is still very funny

“Friendship is useless” “If that’s true, then why are you crying right now” he’s been taking Sasuke lessons in his spare time

“Do you know of a man named ‘Zabuza Momochi’” !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“These are my only friends” said Sai, about two giant cartoon lions

Sai’s genjutsu scene was actually much sweeter in the book bc Naruto, Sakura, Kakashi and Yamato’s chakra were all protecting him inside his own mind but I don’t mind my boy getting a hug

HAHAHAHAHA WHAT IS THIS CUTAWAY TO NARUTO BATHED IN GOLDEN LIGHT ANNOUNCING “RAMEN” LIKE IT’S A WHOLE SENTENCE OKAY STUDIO PIERROT U NEED A BREAK I GET IT

“What in the hell was that?” that was also my question Shikamaru

Shikamaru with full conviction: To be lazy.... that is my dream

Hahahaha it’s Ninja Teen Romance Hours I guess

“Oh, you don’t want to [go out on a date]?” No that’s not what I’m saying” [walks away] TEMARI PLS

“Going on a date without a strategy, would be like trying to fight a tailed beast unarmed” [Nodding] “You have zero chance of winning, that way” I suddenly understand Kakashi’s dating life a lot more

They really rely on you being aware of Naruto the Last huh gjkhgkjhgk there’s been no mention in any of this filler of Naruto and Hinata even being in a relationship to this point as far as I remember

Fhjkfhkjhfkfh poor Iruka none of the kids know he’s President of the Naruto’s Dad Society

“I know I’m supposed to be striving to get ahead in my career, but there’s also a part of me that really wants to just continue teaching kids, one on one” Irukaaaaa <3333333

Looool even as Hokage, Kakashi just drops out of nowhere to give cryptic life advice and then leaves

Smash the statue, Tsukune, don’t let the establishment tell u what to do!!

“Eating ramen everyday isn’t healthy you know” am I to believe that Kakashi, the man who told Naruto, ‘if you're going to be a ninja, you need to eat your vegetables’ is on a ramen-only diet?? Falsehoods

“And it’s all thanks to you Iruka” khjhgkjhgjhg alright.... you win this round KKIR shippers

WHO IS ANIMATING THIS SCENE IT IS BUCKWILD??? There is no character model to speak of, most of the kids don’t have noses, everyone’s upside down or spinning around, and Iruka is... hiding in a frog sign???

There is no English translation of this caption???? EXPLAIN JAPAN. TELL ME YOUR FROG SECRETS YOU KNOW I LOVE FROGS [INSERT PICTURE OF TENZO HERE]

(Update I looked it up in the sub and the caption offers no more insight. “IRUKA UMINO, AROUND 30 YEARS OLD. STEALTHILY”)

“This is for Hinata, so let’s all try our hardest” Kiba loves Hinata MOST

You know how if you pause in the middle of an animated action, you sometimes linger on an in-between image that looks goofy because it was meant to add to the motion rather than be focused on? This whole episode is animated like one of those images

It’s okay Lee the only dumbbell Naruto is fixated on is Sasuke Uchiha

I know don’t usually post so many images in these liveblogs, but I really need anyone reading this to see the Leaf Village’s semi-canonical Unofficial Mascot Konorin:

He is??? The love of my life???

“I don’t even have a boyfriend and train every day from morning til night” yes you do. His name is Neji Hyuga and he’s very alive and he’s a jonin sensei and he will buy you all the knives you want after he takes all of Hiashi’s money and redistributes it. In this essay I will—

You see what I mean??? Neji wants to be there for Tenten (and Lee)!!!

Tenten: What would Neji do if he were here now

Neji: [starts manifesting]

“It’s you since you’re a taijutsu specialist, but Naruto and Hinata aren’t” yes????? Hinata is???? She doesn’t use weapons but Gentle Fist is entirely taijutsu??? Why does everyone keep forgetting

KHKGJHKJHGKFHKJHFKJ I CAN’T GET OVER NEJI JUST. MANIFESTING ABOVE LEE’S BED TO GIVE HIM SHITTY WEDDING GIFT IDEAS

“And don’t forget: Hyuga” Neji........ what.... does this mean!!!!!!!!

Why say “Neji” like that Orochimaru and in fact why say anything at all [Konan voice] I’m the Hokage now, the entire criminal justice system is on its way you are going to jail!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I really can’t believe that the Naruto writers looked at Tenzo’s role in Naruto SD and decided “let’s do that.... but worse”

They animated?????????? A smaller Lee??????????? Into Lee’s mouth???????????? As if the animation style wasn’t enough. I need a minute

They are really going full Naruto SD huh??? Cut away skit like a ‘genjutsu’ scne. Lee and Guy playing a married couple and Tenten a baby. Neji in drag. This is a choice

“How can you misunderstand Neji so much” “Even if it’s only as a ghost, I’m sure that Neji would appear” I need. Several minutes

Fhjkhfkjfh Shikamaru’s vision of Gaara, Bee, Kakashi and Tsunade hanging out at this fancy restaurant. Is this who he thinks Kakashi’s social circle is these days (he might be right)

“Okay, I’ll hear you out!” Is this implication of this scene that Temari thinks Shikamaru’s idea of a first date is marriage... and she’s WILLING TO GO ALONG WITH THAT. TEMARI PLS

“Hey Ino, why would you go out of your way to make something I love? Bc she looooves you Sakura

“Sakura, I thought the same thing” GOD JUST GET MARRIED

“It’ll be too late once we go in, I could get all caught up in the mood or something like that” wait........ does Temari think Shikamaru wants to get married or fuck???? Or both??? OH MY GOD

Gaara: Naruto’s getting married.... without meeeeeeeeeee

God I love Gaara’s Blank Period hair it is truly careless and happy hair

“His ramen’s extravagent?” JKGHKHKJH everyone in the Leaf Village trying to convince Gaara that Naruto’s taste is incredibly obnoxious which is true but not in the way being described

Kankuro what’s your damage let Gaara buy a nice and personal present for the love of his life

Every time I think this arc can’t get more ridiculous it exceeds my expectations:

[Vaguely horrified accompanying dialogue: “The Raikage—” “—Will do the Hidden Cloud Dance?”]

“Well then, Gaara is just going to have to do the Hidden Sand Samba” Ah. Of course. The Hidden Sand Samba. Why didn’t anyone think of this plan before

Gaara is blushing because his new dream is just to samba dance with Naruto into the night

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh Teuchi giving Naruto an “all you can eat forever” coupon that’s cute our sweet boy is so loved

Gaara: My wedding gift to you, Naruto... is me :)

“I’m just disappointed that we aren’t going to get to see you dance, Gaara” you know what that’s fair Kankuro me too

Hahahaha Shino dissing Kiba’s plight for becoming Hokage to these random kids

I can’t pay attention to anything this ninja cat is saying because they’ve got Naruto’s voice and it is very distracting

There’s something to be curious about how it would be if Kiba married into a family that has a contract with the Uchiha lmao

Literally the girl who Kiba is supposed to be in love with is given Hinata’s voice #kibahinarights

“Oh, just take it. Money means nothing to me” the Beekeeper is truly one of the strangest characters in the Naruto universe just conceptually. Why are they wearing a giant bee stinger on their butt?

LMAO @ Kiba having absolutely no self-doubt whatsoever. Goals!!

Shino becoming a teacher after the war is actually one of the post-699 futures I like, good for him!

Iruka sweet man Naruto has compared you to a father like 1500 times have you not overheard him one (1) time

Kakashi is such a dumb stubborn bitch trying to find a way for Naruto to have a happy wedding... I love him

“This is my fault, I never taught him how to treat women! Not that I even really know about that kind of thing of course” Iruka Umino confirmed canonically gay

“I just have to bow my head a little” KKIR: 2; Me: 0

I love this tradition of Hokage boys bowing their heads for cooperation between villages yesssssssssssss

Outro for the whole OG Team 7.... I’m fine everything’s fine I’m good cool cool cool cool cool

The implication that they just sell Kakashi wigs in the village... amazing

I know this is about to be an emotionally poignant moment but what Naruto’s presence is reminding is that the only word he has said in the past 6 episodes is “ramen” LMAO

“I’m going to have to apologize to her for raising you as a such a thoughtless, inconsiderate man” raising you... RAISING YOU..................... TRULY PRESIDENT OF THE NARUTO’S DAD SOCIETY GOD BLESS IRUKA UMINO

LOOK AT THIS CRYBABY NINJA THIS IS WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT ONE OF MY FAVOURITE PARTS OF KONOHA HIDEN WAS HOW IRUKA KEPT BURSTING INTO TEARS OVER NARUTO EVERY OTHER MINUTE THIS IS WHAT BONDS LOOK LIKE

God..................... the Team 7 lover in me just despairs of this final episode bc they’re all separated and also Tenzo needs justice 4 being Kakashi’s co-wedding planner it’s in the book I read it!!!!

I will set aside my feelings to recognize that Kakashi looks very handsome

Goodbye Naruto you were certainly an experience and I mean that in every possible intonation

#decided to watch the last animated season i'm truly done!!!#ayesha talks anime #ayesha liveblogs nahruto shipduden #liveblogging #naruto series #long post

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portfolio- · 8 years ago

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Thoughts about Ruler: Master of the Mask, Part 13

Me last night: *browses instagram for spoilers* *Sees YSH in king's robe* *SCREAMS* *flops on bed*

This episode exceeded all my expectations. You've been warned.

Me watching episode 35:

Word of advice: Get a guy like the crown prince because he's such a decent human being. Cinnamon roll.

I still feel sad for Hwa Goon's dad.

I AM SHOOOKT. I HATE LEE SUN TO THE BONE RN BUT L WAS SO GOOD YA!! I didn't mind him stealing KSH's thunder in that scene.

But for Ga Eun to get mad at him, FINALLY WAAAAAA. "What kind of a king do you think you are to me?" GO TELL HIM GIRL.

But that very subtle confrontation with Lee Sun and his mother. </3

Now the crown prince is mad. YA KICK SOME LEE SUN'S ASS!! (hugs YSH)

"You are not the man I love." "Lee Sun, please put down that which is not yours." Baby girl stop playing nice he doesn’t deserve someone as pure as you.

NOW YOU GO BLAMING MY GIRL WHAT THE FUCK YA (shakes fist like hell)

WTF YOU ASSHOLE

WTF YOU

Me watching episode 36:

My crazy queen dowager playing with the fake king COME ON DON'T GO TO THE OTHER SIDE

Chief Eunuch being your resident sneaky librarian friend and Ga Eun the smart girl that she is. I love that scene. Hahaha. The sneaking messages between the book pages is so relatable.

I love how sentimental Woo Bo is, and how ironic the crown prince's situation is. In the end, he is the one person who hasn't been free throughout this entire mess. AHHHHH (hugs YSH)

FUCK FUCK FUCK

And now the royal court (through the head eunuch) is on the crown prince's side. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

AND THAT DAEBIMAMA/CROWN PRINCE REUNION. BUCKETS OF TEARS. BUCKETS.

Asshole Lee Sun (his new name) daring to remove the mask to show the ~true face~ of the king. NOT ON MY WATCH.

Baby girls scheming together. That's the cutest thing I've seen at this point in the story. Now you say Ga Eun is not smart and useless? Nah-uh uh-uh.

Park Chul Min and the laughs he brings to this show. HAHAHAHA. Oh gosh.

Crown prince and his babies scheming and infiltrating the palace (me jumping on my seat)

Baby girl Ga Eun and Kko Mool scheming and infiltrating the greenhouse

Crown prince appears in...HOLY SHIT

HOLY SHIT

AHHHHHH AHHHHHH AHHHHHHH AHHHH AHHHH AHHHHH

(at this point I'm just screaming while watching)

AHHHHHH AHHHHHH AHHHHHHH AHHHHHH AHHHHHH

HOLY FUCKING SHIT HOW IN THE WORLD IS YOO SEUNG HO THAT HANDSOME

As you can see from my thoughts above, I was so overwhelmed by everything that took place in the recent episode. I mean, wow, Ruler did pick up its slack. Looking back, it's been a while (I know I keep on saying that) since I've spazzed like this for this series. There definitely has been ups and downs, with emphasis of ups at the extremes. This intensity was something I've missed. When the story sticks to its real star -- the crown prince -- it really does take the cake. I will probably rewatch this episode once I calmed down because, holy guacamole, I am still screaming internally (in a good way). 10/10 for this episode, yes?

The servants of the royal court have finally taken their side with the crown prince proving how he values each and every person in the kingdom, even the children. I've been waiting for them to step up their game so bad. I missed their presence in the entirety of the show, because they could play dirty if they had to. I love how they orchestrated with the crown prince's inner circle. I am glad that, even if it’s too late, they've shown the power that these people have.

The queen dowager, my crazy woman, reminded me of Yeosangun momentarily in her encounter with the crown prince. She lived a miserable life by being unable to bear children, which is what sageuks usually emphasize. She missed a child's love, whether if it is her blood or not. I'm so glad I stuck with her through it all. To the core of it, all she needed was someone to value her, and I'm so, so happy that the crown prince set aside his anger and bridged that gap for them to hold hands (literally and figuratively). By now, I am quite certain that she is on the real crown prince's side, and I'm so excited for her to take the spotlight again as we close this show.

Lee Sun had it coming -- the downfall, that is -- and it is so satisfying to watch him lose it. Every person he hoped to believe in him as he fought to be king turned their backs on him -- his mother and Ga Eun. At this point, he is mirroring Dae Mok with his selfishness and greed. No wonder they got along together. He appeared so miserable when Ga Eun rejected everything he planned to offer to her, but seriously, he brought this upon himself. (L did great in this episode. He had me clapping even if I hate his character.)

And Ga Eun, thank you so much for shining so bright this time. I'm glad that she was the one to talk down to Lee Sun. Lee Sun was everything the crown prince is not, and she had to slap that to the fake king's face. We've seen glimpses of her being an unstoppable force when she sets her mind into things, but now we see her doing it and doing it well. Not even her "imprisonment" could stop her from achieving her goals. I'm glad that she knew who to trust this time -- Kko Mool, our little angel -- and that by herself (BY HERSELF Y'ALL), she made a way to fulfill her goals once more. Ga Eun has no armies, but she has her mind, and letting her use it was so, so satisfying. Good job, baby girl! She would eventually find the placenta jar (this is long overdue, writers!!), and I want her to join the court and slap it once more on the fake king's face that he is not who he wants to be.

And our crown prince, what do I say? He held this episode all together. He made sure that he had us wrapped in his fingers and had us pining for his return. I love that he solidified his role as the cornerstone of the show, and it was so, so good of a revenge to all who wanted him gone. I love how YSH handled this role when he arrived at the assembly. The way he held himself screams "I am the king." and my god, wasn't he a sight to behold? All the subtleties he showed fit the description of being the true king -- the dignified stance, the steady gaze, the brewing storm in his eyes. My god.

I hope Ruler doesn't disappoint us with its finale. It raised the bar once more, and it would be a shame if it all fizzles out. For now, let us all enjoy gazing at this beautiful human being named Yoo Seung Ho because damn. Damn. (bites lip) Damn.

What did I say again? Damn.

#spoilers #thoughts #Ruler Master of the Mask #ruler master of the mask meta #Ruler: Master of the Mask #yoo seung ho #lee sun #han ga eun #kim so hyun #kim myung soo #wow #i mean wow #come on #that episode was brilliant #amazing #korean drama #pretty people being smart and sneaky #what is not to like

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365dailyaffirmations · 7 years ago

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TGIWednesday and having more patience with your prayers

TGIWednesday News

Wow the dawg dayze of Summer. Hot and more hot and folks are impatient to say the least. My G-Daughter Charlie was traveling and I wanted to share that awesome Pacific Northwest picture of her in fields of flowers and lavender. So gorgeous and refreshing and a reminder to stop and smell the flowers along the way. Also a great reminder to be patient with our prayers. Just like I have a lot of folks on the my daily prayer option, we don’t always get say 10 of our requests in one month, but it seems like after about 3 or 4 months things start to really kick in. We are reminded to let go and let God. Because we also have a lot of folks dealing with extreme heat and raging fires out West, the earthquake in Indonesia, we've just gone through the full moon eclipse events AND are in the midst of Mercury Retrograde - this can be a lot for us to endure. To help you through this, watch this brand new clearing video I recorded with my friend Marla Martenson that will help smooth things out. https://youtu.be/0Qi1FhfTf_Y

TGIWednesday Download

~ HAVING PATIENCE WITH PRAYER ~ I believe think know and feel that I can and will have patience with my prayers. That each prayer is heard and often occurs outside of my timeline and in spirits own time. I am ready, willing and able to sit back after prayer and like a balloon envision my prayers rising up through the ethers. I know when, where, how and why to just let go and let God. I believe that my prayers and those who are praying for me are in forward momentum filled with action now and so it is in all languages and throughout all time lines.

Fish Food

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

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Live Shows and Replays

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From the Fish Box

"Jimmy!! Today the bank rang me to say they will accept my proposal to offer them $552k as settlement on our $1.35k debt!! That’s $800k of forgiveness by them which is a clear miracle. Every day I fish “I will prevail with the bank” which has always been a strong “yes”, and so I’ve had confidence that prevail is just what we would do. Spirit moves in mysterious ways....... had I not asked my friend for that loan....and been refused by her financial advisors......I would not have talked to my accountant who in a roundabout way suggested a specialist financial consultant who works “outside the box”. Plus we subscribed to your prayer program for the month and everything has felt smooth...... Thank you so much Jimmy...you have been there for me all along this bumpy road ....whenever I’ve asked for your help.....reached out..... you have made time for me......leveled with me......given me strength. Thank you, thank you, thank you ....and to spirit Much love." - Rick, Australia

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TGIFunny

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