#my husband and i were looking forward to playing (ie me watching and him playing)

[rinny009]

i might be smiling

but in fact

i am dead on the inside

OF THE FACT THAT MY HUSBAND’S REVERIE COPY HAS NOT SHIPPED

AT ALL

AND WE DONT EVEN HAVE A LABEL CREATED]

[goblinconceivable]

braindump: betty/daniel

I’ve been living with them for a while, notes taken, a few stories significantly started but there’s a gelling issue, which I’m hoping is at least partially down to a lack of proper braindumping.  So, in no particular order and certainly not comprehensive:

Frankly I also got too hooked on the last 2 eps, which is likely where I’m blocked.  It’s an abrupt emotional twist for them (esp Daniel), and in trying to make sense of that I’m losing focus on the 4 previous years.

- I’m a little bit obsessed in the scene where Betty tries to convince Matt she’s fearless by pointing out her bang-less-ness.  And then runs into Daniel, who is at that moment half brain-washed, but yet when she asks about her fearless quotient his response is immediate and natural and entirely lacking in irony: “no bangs.”  It’s a tiny little moment that shows how well he not only knows her, but understands her.  Without judgment, without fanfare.  Were I to have a husband, this is the sort of response that would confirm I’d married the absolute perfect guy for me.

- They’re too close for mirroring to be an important indicator, but there are two scenes that stand out in this vein: the first is when Betty thinks he may have pushed Christina down the stares and steals the video.  She’s backing out the door, and he follows, matching her step for step.  I love the direction choices because from her perspective there’s a sense of menace, Daniel as potential villain is stalking her.  But from his guileless perspective he’s talking to her and if she’s moving, so is he.  The second is from the penultimate, talking about Trista, where Betty’s rolling back and forth and he moves with her, rather than simply turning his head.  It signals his full engagement in the conversation, seeking her attention, and is why the scene plays as flirting rather than their normal banter.

- That bulletpoint was getting a bit long, so second point on the flirting is that it plays against Betty shutting down the conversation “none of my business,” leading to the fight over involvement in each other’s personal lives, leading to the revelation that they know each other at that deep personal level so very, very well.  Which was a very clumsy leadup to Daniel’s revelation during Hilda’s wedding speech, that could have been handled so much more deftly but those last two eps were quite rushed, I don’t know when they found out about the shortened season but it feels like they’d planned for more space and had to jab in exposition.

- Becaaaaause: they narratively broke his ‘aha’ moment onto “know you better than you do” while the strength of the message is really in the “do anything to protect them.”  Which is, I believe, where they cut to his softened expression.  Not coincidentally, this is precisely what a lot of fan-readings of the characters focus on: Daniel will do anything to protect Betty.  Bobby might have said he’d throw himself under a bus for Hilda, but Daniel HAS done that for Betty- in fact literally doing so would probably have been easier than publicly shouldering the blame for the Tornado cover and giving away the profits.  Due to the fact that he had time to consider the consequences and did it anyway.

- Which is tidy segue into an admission that I’m flying mostly blind on the Molly arc because I basically skipped all her scenes, but it’s my understanding that Daniel doing this was a pivotal moment for them.  Ie, she was impressed that he did this thing.  I mean, I really appreciate that he spent the whole press conference scene looking for Betty, so the show in no way undercut their relationship.  But then they very clearly built the Molly relationship on the foundation of not only the man Daniel had become due to Betty, but choices he was making in large measure for Betty: it’s not that he saw Betty beaten down and resolved the situation: he was upset but lost, she yelled at him, and THEN he resolved the situation by taking the bullet.  Did I break grammar by ending up with two colon’d clauses in the same sentence?  It’s a braindump, ain’t gotta be pretty.  XP

- Quick sidebar that the same thing happens with Alexis.  She was expecting to come back to one brother, but then listens in on his pep talk with Betty and finds she’s returned to a different brother.  This may be where I got the “an assistant” phrasing, if so, my bad.  But basically, she was impressed with Daniel’s actions, not understanding that it was Betty specifically inspiring his actions.

- Follow that a step further and did Molly ever acknowledge how important Betty is to him?  Legit question.  I think her line here was about him doing it “for an assistant” (?) rather than even “his assistant,” establishing Betty as a non-entity for her.  (Quoting a summary but I think I’m in the ballpark.)  And I’m sure I’d have read about it somewhere if she brought Betty up during their discussion on who he’d date when she was dead.

- Just one last note on Molly, (okay it’s a multi-part though it veers off her as a character) but a possibly incorrect beef is that I hate the Daniel/Molly relationship because there’s no interesting or even real conflict?  It’s perfect?  I’m supposed to think this is magical “true love”?  Molly has apparently been engaged for years to a man she doesn’t really love (and um... that’s lazy not strong), and helps inspire a vengeance filled betrayal by her ex because she’s so awesome everyone loves her?  But she comes out squeaky clean because any emotional cheating on her part is balanced and thus “justified” by Connor falling for Wilhemina.  And then the only “conflict” is that she’s dying, and is perfect throughout it?  That’s...  weak.

-That poem thing WOULD have been an interesting point of conflict but it was resolved by Betty’s intervention, rather than within the relationship.  Which actually is an incredibly interesting beat.  The problem with that being it’s so entirely consistent with the role Betty plays in Daniel’s life that it’s treated as just another beat, as if it doesn’t MATTER that a fundamental moment of intimacy and growth of vulnerability in Daniel’s very important romantic relationship is a door opened by a third party.  There’s a strong argument to be made for something but I broke off to write the next point and now can’t remember what that strong argument is.  I might remember later.  It may have had something to do with Molly being a stepping stone in Daniel’s arc, but the cult-thing was so long and dominating that it didn’t work, it tied him too tightly for too long and coinciding with a loosening of his relationship with Betty there was flailing.

- Quick one: Daniel’s fast-forwarded and time-bounded relationship with Molly is the analog to Betty’s time-limited relationship with Henry.  Which is a discussion I would like Daniel and Betty to have.  Esp. noting that Betty and Henry had issues they worked through together (ice cream foreplay being one.)

- Player!  So going back to a happy place, when Betty’s on the phone trying to fix the apartment situation and the camera pans onto Daniel just leaning against the doorway: this may be a legitimate little moment of “squee!”  There’s so much denial in his laid back attitude at Player, but I still love watching how the informality of the environment reflects in the informality with Betty.  He gives her free reign, and there’s many answers to “why,” and I (almost) don’t want to go into them because I totally adore how this Daniel is basically a College!Daniel only he’s latched onto Betty, who, meanwhile, is just being Betty.  OMG how different his life would have been if he’d met Betty in college...

- Okay I actually don’t feel like going into whys, it’s just an arc to enjoy.  With a small mention of how he TOTALLY was playing with the MODE book and handed it to Betty knowing she’d understand and use it to get them back in.  Such a crazy subtle manipulation, to the point where I’m not sure it wasn’t almost entirely subconscious on Daniel’s part.

- The YETI recommendation letter.  What I love is that this is another time when Daniel fvcks up, but fixes it, and more importantly displays competence and ingenuity alongside authentic caring and effort.  Here’s the thing: YETI wanted Betty, even if it was just a quota thing (which it wasn’t entirely, at least one of the board was generally enthused.)  So all that was necessary was to have them re-label her as from Player.  Daniel knew this and did this.  And told Betty that.  BUUUUT that point was purposefully (by script and character) overshadowed by the gesture of the lengthy rec letter he put significant time into.  Whose real audience was... wait for it...  Betty.  He even did a second draft!  Which is more time and effort and a cleaner product.

-  Also flaking on her practice run.  I also enjoy how he (finally...) bounced back into the office clearly having forgotten her schedule, but having mentally shifted from Molly-space into Betty-space.  He’s enthused, he’s engaged, he’s sort of bantering and I’d like to see where that scene would have gone if she hadn’t immediately gotten the acceptance call.

- So there’s this moment somewhat early on, pretty sure when Betty’s taking the writing class, and wants Daniel to give her feedback.  And he’s all “why?,” coming from his “I don’t actually know what I’m doing” place.  She responds that he’s her friend and wants to know what he thinks.  And he does a little double-take at that word.  Because until that point Daniel totally sees Betty as HIS Friend, and they’ve referred to each other as friends, with a little “f,” and he believes that.  But it wasn’t until this moment that he even considered that HE might be HER Friend.  Presumably because he doesn’t believe he has anything to offer her, beyond the power he holds as EIC and her boss - ie, “here run this show” and other such responsibilities.

- Which is a recurring theme.  Pronounced on relationship stuff especially.  When she asks him for input on the Henry vs Gio situation, when she’s trying to date the playwright.  His response is always “I’m in no position to offer relationship advice/judgment on relationships.”  He sorta dodges the first and is permissive on the second.  I don’t know where to go with that so I’ll leave it (for now).

- When  he was supposed to be in Rio, Betty wasn’t even at MODE, she was working for the “enemy,” and he was sending her regular postcards?  First, they’d have been postmarked in New York and presumably with local stamps, so I’m not 100% on Betty not cottoning on.  But it’s super cute that he was thinking of her when he was incommunicado with literally everyone else.  Did he want her to figure it out (subconsciously)?  It’s an act of reaching out, but also of convincing: he’s created a fictional narrative of being in Rio, fed and embellished by the media and swallowed by coworkers, but it’s through Betty that he’s establishing the fiction in a definitive way.  He wants HER to believe it, because if SHE believes he’s there and having a good time, then he can believe it too, with a small piece of his imagination.

- Same convincing as in Player.  BTW, how did all those messages on her phone work?  He was 99% totally hiding the situation from her.  a) why wouldn’t he just call her from his phone, as he always did in the past?  b) he was creating another fictional space.  Where her “number” was literally on a post-it on his temporary assistant’s monitor.  It’s all play: “call Betty” happens many times, and every one is the act of doing it while knowing that he’s not really doing it.  c) Betty does not point out that he should have been confused he never heard back, or more to the point, that he never heard her voicemail message.  d) he was in a state of limbo waiting for her to come back, nothing is real until she does.  At which point there’s lovely dramatic tension since he both wants her to fix it and get them out of there, and wants to draw her into this new reality and thus make it feel viable.

- 100th Anniversary edition.  I love the idea that he’s hep on her writing his bio because he needs her name, at least, to be next to his.  His identity as EIC is predicated on her being his partner, and needs that shown, even if it’s functionally an “in joke” because it’s not like she can be featured.  In musing over his thoughts while flipping through the book right before deciding to quit, I usually come back to a realization of the transience of the role, but I want it to be a gutpunch of how he assumed, without being aware, that Betty would be next to him in picture, and that’s what they were heading for.

- I’ve actually got through most of my notes, so just a couple more.  Daniel is super impressionable.  He did what Becks told him to in the pilot.  He did what Natalie told him in the cult-situation.  Both against his better judgment - his look after Betty when he kicked her out for being “drama he didn’t need” - that’s the same look when he told her to clock out and was dragged off by the not-16-year-old.  I’m too tired to go check the pilot, but assuming similar look there.  He does what he’s told by anyone telling him to do something, but he WANTS to be rescued from the bad influences, who are so often so forceful.

- Final scene: okay so it turns out quick a lot of my thoughts are trying to understand Daniel.  His growth is blatant and deep.  So a second round will be more Betty-focused.  ‘Cuz I identify strongly with her and don’t have a lot of surface questions about her motivations, but I’m LOST on side of the romantic coin.  And plus she deserves a close look regarding how she grows during the series.

- I watched at least part of the reunion and very much like how AF answered the question of the final scene versus what EM says.  Because I think they each, as actors, see it from the perspective of their characters, which means it was played authentically and grants insight.  AF basically says that she saw it as Daniel coming to say thank you, and how it came down to Betty teaching him that he was good enough.  Which came across a little funny because her phrasing implied they’d never talk or see each other again or something and that’s an alarming finality.  But also implies that Betty really did see moving to London as a significant parting of ways, something that started as soon as she became an editor and their relationship changed.  Probably before.

- She then challenged EM as to why Daniel didn’t say goodbye (as if she didn’t know and hadn’t thought about it?  I’m guessing this was panel performance: asking the question “in character” and throwing the question to the other relevant actor.)  But anyway, EM’s answer was “Because things were just starting.”  Which is blatantly a shippy answer, and he even explains Daniel’s “revelation” as when he “really saw Betty for the first time through and through.”

- At some point in these things you’re like: oh but I thought of something else, and only stop when your brain falls asleep.

- I thought of something else.  And then I forgot it.  My brain is failing!  But not yet failed.

- After Betty gets her braces off there’s this scene near the end, at the shoot.  Daniel sees her and crosses quite purposefully to talk with her.  He wants to banter and share this exciting moment with her.  And the scene goes a little strange when Betty kinda goes “yeah, going now bye.”  I expected more eye contact, a big smile, more conversation.  That’s Betty.  That’s them.  But instead it’s a little awkward so Something Is Happening Here.  Is she self-conscious?  Did she see and hear something in Daniel’s look and comment right after she was detached from the bra and isn’t at this moment comfortable with him?  Is this all fallout from her dream in which she and Daniel slept together/he thought she was a bad person/rejected her only they chose not to explicate this/cut a useful scene/thought I’d get that right away but I’m obtuse?  I don’t think it’s the last one because while I can be horribly obtuse, I don’t think it was coded.  But that’s what the obtuse would say.

- At any rate they don’t pick up on it again, next scene (next ep) they’re back to normal.

- But Daniel does immediately chase after Amanda and let go of her.  Which is payoff for his convo with Betty earlier where she sort of disdainfully asks if he WANTS a more serious relationship with Amanda.  I did sort of wonder if he actually does, but Betty’s judgmentalness is what convinces him he doesn’t.  Usually I’d say Betty understands him so well she knows he doesn’t, but they’re not as close at this point, Betty is living her own life much more, so I dunno.

- But I don’t actually think Daniel was falling for Amanda, or that the show wanted us to think that was ultimately a viable path.  Because of that moment when he’s in a car, calls Amanda, says “I really need to see  you” and she turns him down.  It parallels his text to Betty when Molly died.  One text and Betty came over.  This was an actual distressed voice convo and Amanda doesn’t care enough about him to be there, which is really great development for Amanda even though we don’t see her!  She previously went after Matt when he was in jail, she’s interested in Tyler here, she’s not totally pining for Daniel!

- Daniel of course was using Amanda and their earned if mild emotional intimacy as a crutch, trying to fill the space Betty left.  Also note when Amanda turned him down for sex and he stayed to “hang out,” - this is not supposed to be an analysis of Amanda but I wanna note I like that moment because it felt like she was pleased to think she wasn’t just sex to him, while still being over him romantically. Because she does care about him.

- Or for pete’s...  I have this bad habit of writing notes which I later look at and am like... “huh?”  This is a fic idea, from Daniel’s POV: “Betty had moulded him, often by sheer force of her iron will, into being a man who almost deserved Molly.  And he'd turned right around and become a man who would never deserve Betty.”  And I DON’T REMEMBER WHAT THE SECOND HALF MEANS.  Specifically.

- Wedding dancing.  Happens twice.  Hilda’s wedding, we know what that is.  But at Daniel’s wedding.  I like that he wasn’t 100% Molly focused, ‘cuz, shipper.  And I know why the show had Matt cut in, because gotta keep things moving.  But isn’t it a thing that you don’t cut in on the groom/bride?  It’s their day.  Daniel just sort of nonverbally asks Betty if it’s okay (to leave her with Matt), but can’t help a) thinking he was a bit put out and b) want Molly to see his expression looking at Betty and have some sort of “aha” moment where she - do Molly and Betty have any scenes together?  I don’t remember seeing any and I think I did skim through all the eps, but I need to do that again.

- Ooh, one of the things I forgot en route!  I like that Betty has revolving love interests, because that’s textual argument for Betty never having feelings (romantic) for Daniel.  Which is super, super important in this iteration of the story.  There’s a couple moments - pilot and the first bridge scene - where she arguably has a momentary crush, which quickly settles into a developing platonic relationship.  

- Jump back to Daniel finally seeing Betty as a true equal = romantic feelings.  It’s a thing.  Look my brain is deteriorting and wording is hard!  So there’s two sided imbalance throughout.  Daniel always saw Betty with this veneer of youth, and a great deal of his use for her is helping her “grow into the woman she’ll be.”  And that’s the roadblock in him seeing her as a romantic possibility.  Which was initially quite awesome because he was sleeping with people younger than her, even the “she’s actually 20″ girl was younger than Betty.  And yet always saw her as in many ways more mature and competent than her.  And double-yet he still saw how much further she could, and would, grow.  His belief in her knows no bounds.

- Meanwhile Betty sees him as...  someone who’s also becoming.  Who has great potential.  Bullying him into it if necessary.  And because he’s guided by her, she can’t crush on him, he’s like her pet.  Were she to have a crush, much less fall for him, it would have been horrifying.  She needs to have a moment when she sees him as a true equal, someone who - look, everyone is always still growing so it’s not like he needs to be fully formed, and it’s a little murkier what the moment would look like when she finally sees Daniel “for the first time.”

- ‘cuz as noted, Betty has been there for pretty much every important moment of growth and crossroads in every facet of Daniel’s life.  Whereas Betty consistently had many things and relationships in her life Daniel was not involved in.  She’s always been way more self-reliant (not the word I wanted, is there one that starts with c?)  It’s why they did sort of need to peel away through a chunk of S4, because Daniel needed to learn to cope without Betty propping him up, because it’s like a Miranda-thing:

- “I don’t need Gary.  But I want him.”

- Daniel has to be able to be find without Betty before Betty can see him as a viable romantic partner.  She has to see something she never has before.  Daniel saw that the seedling he’d been protecting was not only strong enough to survive on its own had grown up and bloomed (process begun early in the season when he was being overprotective and she shut that down).  For Betty...  I guess Daniel...  ...  .....  it didn’t happen in the show.  As EM noted, for Daniel, the ending was the beginning.  Because his moment isn’t leaving MODE, that’s just the corresponding moment to Betty shaking him off.  His moment is further down the road when he puts into practice everything he’s learned and ...  something answered in fanfic because it’s spec and I’m tuckered.

[annab-recs]

Can’t Be Trusted - JJ Maybank

Kooks have never really trusted pogues, but you have gained the trust of some as you babysit and dogsit for them. After inviting JJ over as you are dogsitting, a necklace goes missing and who else would have taken it other than the infamous kleptomaniac, right?

Warnings: some curse words

Word Count: 2.9k+

--------------------------------------------------

"I think someone's mom is home!" You shout from the back door. After playing little game of hide and seek, Austin and Ava wanted to play in their treehouse, so you went inside and chilled out until their two-year-old sister, Aubrey, woke up.

"Okay! We will be out in a minute!" Ava shouted to you as she poked her head out the treehouse window. You rolled your eyes playfully before returning to Aubrey who was still a little groggy from her nap. All she wanted to do was lay in your arms and watch Trolls.

"How were they today, y/n?" Sadie asked you when she walked into her home.

"Absolute angels as always. This one is a little sleepy from her nap, but she just needs cuddles and she'll be fine. The other two are in the treehouse," you tell her as you walk over to where she was standing by the kitchen counter. Aubrey makes grabby hands at her mother and you lean forward to hand her off.

"Hey, I meant to ask you this when you were here last week but how would you feel about dog sitting?" You shot her a weird look as she did not have any dogs, but nodded, nonetheless.

"My sister, Savannah, has three dogs and she and her husband are going on vacation for a week. She just needs someone to let the dogs out and feed them and stuff. I told her about you because you are so great with the kids and I knew that if I can trust you with them, she can trust you with her dogs," Sadie finished.

It was nice to hear a kook say something so kind about a pogue. The adults don't seem to have as big of a problem with pogues as the teenagers do. You were happy to hear that she trusted you so much with her children because you love her kids so much and would do anything for them.

"You can tell her I'm interested," you tell Sadie and she nods.

"Okay, I'll send her your number. Thanks again y/n," she spoke as she handed you some money for your service and you walked out after hugging each of the kids goodbye. 

...

"Okay, so that's all that you really need to know. You can stay here if you want so that you don't have to travel back and forth across the island. Let me show you the guest room." You follow Savannah through her house and to the guest room.

"You can invite your friends like Kiara or Sarah to stay with you, so you aren't too lonely. You can literally do whatever as long as you clean up after yourself, but I know I don't have to worry about anything with you. Sadie talks very highly of you." You blush at the comment and send her a smile. "Do you have any questions?"

"No ma'am. I think I got it all." She smiles at you as Bo, her golden retriever, licks up your leg. The two of you chuckle as you head back to the kitchen.

"Okay well here's the key and the code for the alarm system is 1742. I'll turn it on when we leave and when you get here, just turn it off and then turn it back on at night. Once again, thank you so much for doing this. I could not find anyone and the girl who normally keeps the dogs is going to be gone as well."

"No problem, Mrs. Savannah. I'm extremely excited to get to be with these pups all week next week," you say as you ruffle your hand through Bo’s fur. Her other two dogs, Bleu and Bailey, have been chilling but Bo has been following you everywhere. You said your goodbyes before heading over to The Wreck where your friends were.

"Hello everyone," you announce your presence as your friends greet you. You take the only empty seat at the table that sits between JJ and Pope and sneakily snag a fry from JJ's plate.

"Hey!" He shouts and attempts to grab the fry back, but it is already in your mouth. A giggle escapes your lips as he pouts about his stolen food.

"You owed me that one after all the food I share with you. At least, I have Pope. You'll share your fries with me, won't you buddy?" Pope grins at you before nodding.

"Of course." He slides his basket of fries closer to you and you gladly take one before Kie offers to get you some. You decline, saying you just wanted to tease JJ to which he frowns before ruffling with your hair playfully. After you fix your hair, the pogues ask you about your day.

"I was actually at Savannah's house, Sarah." She shot you a confused look before telling you to continue. Savannah and Sadie are cousins with Ward, so they are related to the Cameron’s. That's how Sarah knows her.

"I thought you babysit for Sadie," she wonders, and you nod.

"I do but Sadie recommended me to Savannah as a dog sitter, so I'm going to be staying there next week while they're on vacation."

"You're basically a kook now, y/n," JJ jokes as you roll your eyes at him.

"No, but I'll be living in the house of one for a week. I'm a full-on pogue right here and you know it." You say as you point to your heart. You had too many responsibilities to look after and pay for to be a kook. You have to help out your dad with money because your mom left you two when you were seven. Things would be a million times better if you were actually a kook but living like one for a little bit would be nice.

...

It was not long before you were living that dream. Savannah left a few days ago and you have been waking up to Bo’s adorable face next to you every morning. As you watched the dogs run around in the backyard, you decided to invite a friend over. You were getting kinda lonely and Savannah said you could invite someone like Kie or Sarah, so you shot Kie a text first.

Y/n: what are you doing tonight? I'm kinda lonely and wanna sleepover with my girl

Kie: my dad has me working all night and then Sarah and I are going to the mainland early in the morning

Y/n: okay I'll ask one of the guys, thanks though

You can't ask John B because you don't want Sarah to get the wrong impression and Pope has work early in the morning with his dad, so your only option is JJ. There is nothing wrong with JJ. You love him to death, but he tends to slip things away without anyone noticing. You want to make a good first impression so that Savannah will want to use you again in the future. You let out a sigh before calling JJ.

"Hello?" His voice sounded through your ears.

"Hey, are you gonna be busy tonight?"

"No, what's up?" He asks as he makes sure to pop the 'p' at the end of his sentence.

"Well, I'm kinda lonely and Savannah said I could invite a friend to stay with me, so I was wondering if you wanted to." You were kind of nervous he would say no but he didn't.

"Yeah sure. I'll be over at like seven and I can bring a pizza."

"Ooo, sounds good. I'll see you then," you said as you salivated at the sound of pizza. You two ended the phone call and went on about your days until he came over. You showed him around the house and introduced him to Bo, Bleu, and Bailey. You made sure to keep a close eye on him the whole night to make sure he didn't snag anything without you knowing.

"Okay I'm stuffed," you announce as you set you unfinished pizza slice down.

"Well, I'm not so..." he trailed off as he grabbed your slice and finished it. You playfully rolled your eyes as you hopped off the barstool and threw the pizza box in the trash. As he finishes, you let the dogs out one last time for the night before bringing them back in, locking the door, and turning on the alarm.

...

After a while, the two of you both get showered and ready for bed. JJ takes one side and you take the other before turning to face him.

"Thanks for staying with me tonight," you whisper, careful not to wake the sleeping Bo that laid between the two of you.

"No problem, y/n. You know I'd do anything for you." His words bring a smile to your face that he can barely see in the low light. You mutter another 'thank you' and then a 'goodnight' as you press your lips to his cheek before turning around and falling asleep.

...

Though the two of you fell asleep separately with Bo between you, you woke up snuggled into JJ's side, your head resting on his bare chest. Bo laid on the other side of him by his leg. You smiled down at the dog as you slid out of JJ's arms. After admiring his sleeping form, you turned off the house alarm and let the dogs out to do their business.

While they were out, you found some eggs and decided to scramble them for breakfast and serve them with some toast. A shirtless sleepy JJ appeared in the doorway as you cooked the eggs. He rubbed his tired eyes before leaning against the counter next to you.

"Whatcha cooking?" He asks as he looks out the window to watch the dogs run around.

"Some eggs. If you want to help, there's bread over there that you can pop in the toaster," you tell him, pointing in the direction of the bread. He nods and does as you asked of him. He looks around in several cabinets before finding the plates and he pulls out two for y'all. He places them down next to you as you finish the eggs and put them on the plates. As soon as you finish with that, the toast pops up.

"Do you want grape or apple jelly?" He asks as he holds the two options up for you to see.

"Grape please." He takes care of the toast as you get two forks and set the plates down on the counter where you two ate last night. You grab two cups and fill them both with some orange juice to complete your meals.

"We do pretty well together," he boasts looking down at the finished product of your work. You laugh and agree before sitting down next to him. As you eat your breakfast, you look around and really take in the beautiful home you have been staying in.

"This place is really pretty," you say softly, still looking around at everything.

"One day, I'm gonna get you a place like this," JJ says as you giggle. He's always joked that you two were going to end up together and that y’all would go full kook. You had always liked JJ but never tried anything. He never initiated anything either, so you just stayed friends. You nodded at him in agreement.

"One day, we will have a huge house and we'll have dogs too," you add on to the dream. JJ wanted to add kids to the dream too but was not sure how you would feel about it, so he kept quiet.

"Yep," he spoke before filling his mouth with eggs again.

...

"Hey y/n! Sorry to bother you but I was wondering if you had anyone over," Savannah asked you through the phone. You felt tense and unsure about what she was getting at.

"Kiara and Sarah stayed with me one night, but that was it. Do you mind me asking why?" You weren't completely lying. After JJ stayed with you, Kie and Sarah spent the night two nights later.

"Well, I can't find one of my necklaces that I thought I had left in the living room on accident before leaving. It was worth a lot of money and my husband gave it to me. I was going to ask if you had seen it and if you had anyone over, would you please ask them if they had seen it too?" JJ's name ran through your mind constantly as she spoke. That little kleptomaniac probably stole it.

"No ma'am. I didn't see it, but I'll ask the girls and get back to you. I'm sorry."

"It's okay. Just please let me know as soon as possible," she said before hanging up.

"Fuck," you mutter as your mind races. She probably thinks you stole it and she'll probably tell her sister and you won't be able to babysit anymore which is your most steady and good-paying job. You don't even bother asking the girls. Your first priority is JJ.

...

When you walk up to the chateau, you notice JJ laying on the hammock in the back.

"Hey y/n! What's up?" He asked happily but his face changed when he caught sight of yours. "What happened?"

"I'm going to ask you something and I want you to be completely honest with me." He nods, waiting for you to fill him in on what is bothering you.

"Did you steal anything from Savannah's house?"

"What the hell, y/n?" He asks, anger lacing his voice.

"That wasn't a no."

"No, y/n! I didn't steal anything. Why would you ask me that?" He seethes. He's stood up from the hammock now, too angry to sit.

"Because she can't find an expensive ass necklace and you normally like to steal things. Sorry for automatically thinking it was you," you speak sarcastically.

"I didn't steal it, y/n. I never saw a necklace the whole time I was there. You were with me the whole time. The only time we weren't together was when I was in the shower and when you were in the shower, I was in bed. I promise I didn't leave or go anywhere while you were gone." He stops for a minute as he thinks.

"Is that why you watched my every fucking move while I was there? Because you thought I would steal something?" You stayed quiet which gave him the answer he was looking for. He let out a scoff before continuing to speak.

"You know what? Fuck what I said. That whole dream of you and I getting together one day and living like that. I can't do that with someone who doesn't trust me." His words hurt but you shrugged it off as if it did not matter to you.

"That's fine with me. It was a dumb dream anyway. Like we could achieve that." You scoff before turning around and walking home. Tears streamed down your cheeks. You probably just lost your favorite job and your best friend. Could life get any worse? Your phone buzzes in your hand. Reluctantly you look down at it, hoping it was Kie or Pope or Sarah. Someone who could make you feel better, but it wasn't. It was Savannah.

Savannah: hey just wanted to let you know I found the necklace

"Shit," you muttered under your breath as guilt washes over you and you bolt back to the chateau. You had royally screwed up everything and have to fix it. When you walked to the back where JJ was, you saw him sitting in the hammock with his hands behind his head. He glances over at your approaching figure before returning his gaze to the tree above him.

"You here to accuse me of some more shit I didn't do?" He asks bitterly. You deserve it. You were a shit friend.

"Um, no," you whisper as you shake your head and more tears prick your eyes from all the guilt and shame you felt, "I'm so sorry JJ. I shouldn't have jumped to conclusions and I should've believed you. I know you wouldn't lie to me. I was just scared that I would lose my job with Sadie. You know how much I love those kids. I thought I'd never get to be with them again. I know that doesn't justify me accusing you of stealing but I love you and hope you can forgive me."

You wipe away the last of your tears before JJ stands up to pull you into a hug. You wrap your arms tightly around him, glad he seemed to forgive you for your crappy actions.

"I couldn't have stayed mad at you if I tried. I just wish you would trust me more," he whispered in your ear before pulling away from you.

"That's the thing JJ. I trust you so much, with my life and everything, but the things just added up and you'd be lying if you said stealing isn't something you would totally do." The two of you laugh together before JJ pulls you down onto the hammock with him and you lay together, looking up at the sky through the tree branches. A comfortable silence fell over the two of you before JJ decided to speak.

"You stole first," he said softly. You turned to look up at him with a questioning look upon your face.

"What? No, I didn't. What do you mean?"

"You stole my heart," he smiled goofily at you before you roll your eyes and cuddle into him.

"Oh, shut up." You feel his laugh vibrate through his chest.

"I love you, y/n," he whispered as his fingers ran through your hair.

"Love you too JJ," you hummed.

[taeken-my-heart]

Moirai Epilogue

Summary: On your 18th birthday a name appears on your wrist. The name of your soulmate. It’s a momentous day that everyone looks forward to, but you’ve always brushed aside; refusing to believe in a fickle mistress called destiny. But what happens when on the morning of your 18th birthday you wake to find the name of your mortal enemy? Jeon Jungkook.

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader Genre: Soulmates au/ Enemies to lovers au. Angst, fluff, bickering, romance, eventual smut.

Word Count: 3503

Warnings: None! It’s just a big old fluff fest. I hope you enjoy!!

**********

The morning was warm, stuffy with heat under the bedsheets, but your arms goose bumped in the air conditioning of your bedroom. Jungkook’s fingers traced your belly; stretched to what felt like capacity and you sighed as his nose buried itself in your neck.

The house was quiet; a rare morning when children weren’t screaming and work schedules didn’t clash. Granted, you were currently on maternity leave, so you really only had Jungkook’s schedule to worry about.

“Morning.” He murmured against the cusp of your ear, voice husky with sleep. You smiled, reaching back to palm the round of his backside and his chest rumbled against your back. “Ah,” he gasped, lurching forward, “be careful not to start something you don’t want to finish.” He joked and you peered at him over your shoulder, smile wide.

“I always finish what I start.” You murmured. He grinned, pressing his lips against yours, moving you onto your back so he could twist a leg around your waist. His mouth was warm from sleep and you threaded fingers through the sweat dampened curls at the back of his head as he kissed you deep.

His skin was bare, easy access as you let your fingers roam his back and he splayed his fingers across the protrusion of your belly between you. He was obsessed with you pregnant, insisted he’d have 10 more children with you if you could always look this beautiful and round.

 At seven months, you felt like a beached whale, so you were happy at least one of you was deriving pleasure from all of this. His fingers danced along your hip and down your thigh, pulling it to rest across his waist as he kissed you firmer and you smiled into him.

 A beautiful cocktail of love and early morning deliria. “Mommy?” from the doorway a tiny voice spoke and both you and Jungkook moved away from each other.

 Your three-year-old stood by the door, fingers twisting in the cotton of her frilly pink nightgown and you smiled as she watched you with curious round eyes. “Good morning, baby.” You greeted. Harin smiled, running to your side of the bed and climbing up with a huff of exertion. She kissed your cheek wet and you wrapped your arms around her little body, rocking her back and forth.

 Jungkook smiled at the two of you, stroking a long curl from Harin’s face as she peered at him over your shoulder. “Morning princess.” He greeted and she giggled, soft and sweet, stretching her neck to give him a kiss. “Where’s your brother?”

“In his room.” She said, snuggling deep into your chest, fingers tapping at your belly curiously. “Mommy, when do I get my new baby?”

 You grinned, running your fingers through her hair, detangling as you went. “Not too much longer now. This baby has got to stay safe and warm for two more months and then they can come out.”

 “Minseok told me how you got a baby in your tummy.” She said, lifting her head from your shoulder and your eyebrows rose, glancing sideways at Jungkook.

 “Oh?” You hummed and she nodded.

 “Yes. He said daddy put a watermelon seed in your bellybutton and it got big, big, bigger and a baby got there now.”

 “He did, did he?” You chuckled and she nodded, cheeks rounding in a smile. “Ah, well, it’s a little different than that, but a watermelon seed sounds like fun, huh?”

 “Harin-ie,” Jungkook cooed and she looked over at him, doe eyed innocence to match his own expression, “Come get Minseok with me, hmm?” She nodded, jumping down from the bed and you watched Jungkook grab his sweats from beside the bed, pulling them on under the privacy of the covers before he stood, allowing your daughter to take his hand and lead him from the room.

 You laid in bed a little longer, enjoying the serene peace of the morning. Minseok had a little league game later today and you still needed to get up and pack a picnic for after. For now, though, you had time to just lay and be still.

 The late spring brought with it the melancholy of approaching summer. When summer ended, your little Minseok would start kindergarten and that made you inexplicably sad. He was a force of nature, charging into every opportunity life had to offer him like an over eager puppy. Sporty like his dad and strong willed like yourself, there was no need to be worried about him in this new adventure. No, it was more that you would miss him.

 Jungkook paused at your bedroom door on his way to the kitchen, Minseok and Harin running noisily by with giggles and bare feet slapping the hardwood floors. “Did you need help up, my love?”

 You smiled, lifting your arms in the air and wiggling your fingers. He chuckled, coming to your side and pulling you to a stand, hooking an arm around your waist and kissing you silly. “I love you.” He whispered.

 “I love you too.” You hummed against his mouth before pulling away and rubbing at your stomach. “I’ve gotta go pee, this kid is literally sitting directly on top of my bladder.”

 ***

The kitchen was filled with morning sunshine when you finally entered. Jungkook was stood at the gas range in nothing but his sweats, back to you as he made pancakes for your children. You had a thing for backs and his flexed while he worked leaving you flustered and warm. You walked up behind your children, leaving a kiss on Minseok’s head as he played with his dinosaur figurines at the kitchen island.

 “Hi mommy.” He hummed distractedly and Jungkook glanced over his shoulder at you, smiling as you waddled around the kitchen, gathering plates and cups.

 “Don’t look at me like that,” you glowered teasingly, “you did this to me.”

 “And I enjoyed every second of it.” He smirked, wiggling his eyebrows up and down. You snorted softly, smacking his butt as you walked by before setting the table.

 “Come sit at the table.” You called, helping Harin down from her stool and poking Minseok in his side as he continued to play at the island. “Go, go.”

 He pouted, gathering his collection of dinosaurs before sliding from his seat and making his way to the table. You grabbed some fruit, quickly chopping and dropping them into a large bowl. Jungkook was humming softly behind you as he flipped a pancake and you couldn’t help but think that not that many years ago, this had all seemed so impossible.

 It had been almost seven years now so memories were foggy, but this type of happiness had seemed completely unobtainable. Married with children, and with Jungkook no less. Sometimes you felt a little crazy, too. Three children under the age of 6? You were definitely insane.

 You smiled as Minseok roared loudly, using one dinosaur to kill another while Harin huddled beside him in her chair, watching a video on the tablet. You loved your life so much you could hardly express it. The words of your mother echoed in your mind, always telling you how worth it this would all be. You hadn’t believed her at the time, but now you knew.

 Jungkook wrapped his arms around you from behind, kissing your cheek and you melted into him. “Are the pancakes burning?”

 “No,” he hummed, chin settling against your collarbone. “they’re all done, just waiting for fruit. Should I get whipped cream?”

 “They don’t need the extra sugar.” You shook your head. Jungkook ran his hands along your belly absentmindedly, breath warm against your cheek. “You’re obsessed.” You chuckled and his lips pulled into a grin against your neck.

 “True.” He admitted. Minseok squealed loudly at the table and you looked up in time to see Harin racing away with one of his dinosaurs. You laughed, rolling your eyes.

 “Can you go get her please?” You sighed and Jungkook nodded, kissing at your cheek once more before releasing you and following after a little raven-haired girl with contraband. “Daddy is getting your toy, baby.” You called to Minseok as he wailed loudly at the table.

 After finishing breakfast, you returned to the kitchen, pulling out the picnic basket and searching through the fridge while Jungkook got the kids dressed. You enjoyed making and packing lunch, it made you feel disgustingly domestic.

 You could hear the tinkling laughter of your daughter in her bedroom, squeals of delight as Jungkook chased her around her room. You never realized how much it would mean to you to have a husband who played with his kids.

 “Are grandma and grandpa coming today?” Minseok asked, walking back in to the kitchen with his little league bag dragging behind him. He was dressed in his uniform and looking so cute you kind of wanted to squeeze him a little.

 “Yeah, and Aunty Ella, Uncle Michael, Charlie, and Celeste.”

 “Can I bring extra chocolate milk for Charlie and Celeste?” Minkseok asked, coming to stand beside you and you ran your fingers through his shaggy dark hair, humming an affirmative.

 “Yes, of course. I’ll pack snacks for everyone. You really need a haircut.” You remarked. Minseok shook your hand free from his hair and you returned to packing the basket as he patted his hair down, watching you work.

 “I don’t want a haircut.” He quipped and you shrugged.

 “Suit yourself. Tell me how you feel after you play the game today; you might not be able to see well.”

 “I want hair like daddy’s!” Minseok insisted and you smiled as Jungkook entered the room, following after a little pink princess with a brush and some hair ties.

 “Well, daddy does look handsome with his hair like that.” You admitted. Harin stopped by your feet, holding the brush high into the air. “Need help?” She nodded and you lead her to the couch, sitting her on the foot rest in front of you.

 **

 Walking was no longer a fun activity. When Jungkook and you were first dating and into the first year of your marriage, you enjoyed taking walks often. You got to talk, laugh, and just get to know one another. Throw in a little bit of exercise and fresh air and it was the perfect after dinner activity.

 Unfortunately, pregnant walks were not quite the same. You were waddling heavily at this point and the only thing keeping you from throwing a massive fit was Jungkook’s hand at the small of your back and Harin clinging tight to your fingers.

 Minseok was rambunctious and outgoing, but your daughter was his polar opposite; shy and soft spoken. She didn’t particularly enjoy large crowds and she hated loud noises. You and Jungkook had taken to whispering the happy birthday song to her for her last two birthdays because loud singing made her cry.

 Minseok rushed ahead, finding his friends on the team and talking animatedly with them as Jungkook set up your seats and you placed the picnic basket down by your feet. It was unreasonably heavy for just sandwiches and snacks.

 Jungkook helped you sit in your seat before pulling Harin into his lap and sitting down. She curled into his chest, fore and middle fingers sliding into her mouth for comfort. You tried to bat her hand from her mouth but your stomach was in the way and Jungkook just shrugged that she looked cute like that.

 “It won’t be so cute when she’s 14 and sucking her fingers in class.” You huffed and he grinned, tickling under your chin.

 “She’ll grow out of it by then, baby.” He reached his hand across empty space, linking fingers with yours and you sighed, leaning your head back against your chair as you waited for the game to start.

 Your family trickled in slowly, giving hugs and handshakes and Ella sat her chair beside yours with a smile. You watched as her son Charlie ran to go say hello to his cousin and Celeste walked to Jungkook’s side, talking excitedly with Harin who listened quietly. Celeste was loud and outgoing; a real social butterfly.

 Despite the fact that Celeste and Harin were nearly the same age, your baby hadn’t figured out what to make of her yet. Ella chuckled, watching her daughter talk Harin’s ear off and she rubbed her hand up and down your arm.

 “I hope someday they’ll be as close as us.”

 “Me too.” You smiled.

 The day was warm and the sky was clear. Harin was quickly lulled to sleep by the heat, fingers drooping halfway from her mouth, even despite the loud cheers from the parents watching the game. Minseok was every bit the sporty kid that his father was. Like a wrecking ball with the opposing team, he barreled through like it was nothing, kicking the ball into the goal.

 It was impressive now and he wasn’t even 5 yet. You could only imagine what he would be like once he got a little older. The spitting image of his father, he brushed his hair from his face, dripping sweat across his forehead and down his neck.

 “He sweats like you.” You remarked and Jungkook smiled, nodding.

 “Yeah, poor kid.”

 “I brought some extra snacks today.” Ella said, eyeing her children as they both stood on the sidelines, Charlie with his arms held high in celebration and Celeste clinging tight to her teddy bear, head whipping to the side as Minseok’s team ran by with the ball.

 “Oh good,” you remarked, “I have plenty for everyone to eat, but extra snacks are definitely appreciated. I brought lots of extra chocolate milk at Minseok’s request. “

 Ella chuckled, “He and Charlie are such chocoholics.”

 “It’s hereditary.” You muse.

 Minseok’s team won by two points and you smiled, huffing and puffing as you made to stand and cheer. He smiled over at you, waving his arms high above his head from beside his team. Harin was just barely waking up so Jungkook stood up beside you, Harin wrapping her legs around his waist and letting her head droop sleepily on his shoulder.

 Minseok was greeted with loud congratulations by your family as he came charging over and you wrapped him in a hug as best as your pregnant belly would allow. Ella took the picnic basket as you made to reach for it and your dad and Michael helped to carry the seats away from the field and further into the park, over by the lake.

 It was muggy and warm, but there was a breeze by the water and you enjoyed comfortable conversation with your family while the kids played. Ella was in the process of opening her own salon and all the hoops she had to jump through to make it work made your head spin.

 “I don’t know how you do it. I would have had a major meltdown by now.” You commented and Michael laughed.

 “Oh she has, in the privacy of our room.”

 “And a couple crying sessions in the bathroom too,” Ella nodded, “but I’m no quitter and I really want this.”

 “You girls always were a couple of go getters. Don’t know how I got so lucky.” Your mom smiled.

 “You really are pretty lucky.” You sighed, dusting your fingernails off against your chest and your mom laughed, swatting at you.

 Harin came over to sit beside you, munching on her sandwich as conversation continued and you wiped at her chin as sauce dripped over her lips. A perfect mixture between you and Jungkook; you were kind of obsessed with her.

 You spent the rest of the afternoon eating and playing together, enjoying the freedom a weekend afforded you. The men had a race with the kids while you sat with your mother and sister chatting, Harin coming to sit in your lap as soon as the others started running, fingers immediately dipping into her mouth.

 Timid by nature, she steered clear of things she thought might scare or exhaust her. You hoped she would outgrow this, but you’d love her regardless. At home she was loud and liked to bully her older brother, so there was always hope.

 Later that evening, after the kids were in bed, you retreated to your own room, Jungkook close behind. He went to go brush his teeth and you changed into a nightgown with enough room to breathe. Jungkook liked to refer to it as your muumuu and you let him because you agreed. It was comfortable, though, and this far along into your pregnancy and with summer just around the corner, you were in serious need of comfortable clothing.

 Jungkook brought you your toothbrush and you smiled your thanks, running your free hand through strands of raven hair. He hummed, moving his head further into your hand and you chuckled around foaming toothpaste.

 After finishing in the bathroom, you shuffled into bed, twisting and turning with way too many groans to be acceptable and you grinned as Jungkook laughed. “Was that really necessary?” He teased.

 “No,” you admitted, “but it sure is fun to see your face when I do it.”

 He laid down beside you, wrapping his arms around your waist and you laid your head on his chest as you allowed your breathing to even out. The house was quiet and dark, two sleeping babies down the hall and a moment of solitude before Jungkook returned to work tomorrow.

 It had been really nice to have his help today; often times it was just you and the kids and while you loved the moments you got to spend with them, you craved his adult conversation. Life had not turned out the way you had expected, but those twists and turns had brought you to where you were now and that pain taught you what real joy is.

 “Jungkook?” You whispered and he hummed against the crown of your head. “Are you happy with this? With our life together and with me?”

 He pulled away to look down at you, eyebrows furrowed. “What do you mean?”

 “Just that you’re amazing and you’re very handsome, you could have had your pick of anyone. I hope you don’t regret your choice.”

 Jungkook smiled, running his thumb down your cheek. “I don’t regret my choice; it was the best one I could have ever made. I only wanted you.”

 You cuddled closer, heart thumping excitedly in your chest. “Even when I’m round and puffy like this?” you teased and he laughed.

 “You know I love you pregnant. I’d put another one in you if you’d let me.”

 You laughed, kissing at his chin. “Yeah, we’ll see about that, buddy. We agreed on three.”

 “Yeah, but imagine two of each. That would be so fun.” He sighed, dreamy. His chest was warm, rising slowly with his breath and you felt sleepy resting against him. “Y/N?”

 “Yes?” You whispered, eyes still closed and ready to fall asleep.

 “Are you happy with me? Do you feel like you made the right decision?”

 Your eyes blinked blearily open before moving up at look at him and you smiled. “I’ve never been happier. You gave me everything I ever wanted out of life, plus, you’re really sexy.” Jungkook rolled his eyes at you, but he couldn’t hide his grin. “I’m so glad you decided to try again and that you were so patient while I was figuring things out. Our life is way better than I’d ever imagined it could be.”

 “I love you, Y/N.” He smiled and your heart jumped. You’d never get used to it; the feeling of being loved by your soulmate, the feeling of being loved by Jungkook. Like a bird soaring high, your chest rose with emotion; you felt alive with him. You’d never thought it would be possible to love someone as much as you loved him, but for once you were so glad to be absolutely wrong.

 “I love you too, Jungkook.”

 He leaned down to kiss you, smothering you with his weight and you grinned into his mouth, wrapping your arms around his neck. “If you weren’t already pregnant, that would totally be changing tonight.” He huffed against your lips and you chuckled.

 “I’m too tired to make a baby anyway so thank goodness she’s already in there.”

 He whined, mouthing at your neck and you sighed, letting his fingers trail over your hip and down your leg. “Just let me warm you up and you tell me if you’re too tired then.” He murmured and you nodded, kissing your way back to his mouth.

 “Mommy!” Harin wailed loudly from her room and you laughed as Jungkook whined into your neck.

 “Not fair.” He complained as you wriggled away from him and sat up, “you’re just so warm and soft.”

 “Sorry, baby, mommy duty calls. Maybe tomorrow night.” You leaned over, giving him one last kiss as Harin called out for you again. “I’m coming, baby girl!”

**************

And that’s it! Moirai is officially over! Thank you so much for coming on this incredible journey with me! I’ll be editing this story behind the scenes in the hopes of sending it out to publishers at some point. There’s a long road ahead, it needs at least 10 edits, haha, but I’m excited to just try. 

As for upcoming stories on Tumblr, my Yoongi story, “Read Between the Lines” is currently in progress and I’m really excited to share it with you!

Chapter 17

Copyright © 2018 by Taeken-My-Heart. All rights reserved.

[kickingitwithkirk]

She’s My Whip

Pairing: Sam Winchester x Reader

Word Count: 2250

Warnings: oral (m & f giving/receiving) sex, squirting, cursing, pornish language and other adulting things that make it 18+only

A/N:  A-Z Kink Challenge: Younger/Older  Written for @covered-byroses #cbrkinkchallange  Thank you Ms.Kelly for letting me participate in my first writing challenge

A/N: this is my first work (outside a drabble) I’ve ever let anyone read. I quit writing over a decade ago so I’m rusty as hell but working on getting my mojo back. Creative criticism welcome

A/N II: 3/21/21 I did some rewriting on this piece I love so much, fixing the things that’s nagged at me since original release.

* no beta , all mistakes are mine

*GIF not mine

“...So that’s when I knew I had closed the deal.” The guy next to me at the bar Greg, or Gary, who'd been droning on about this deal for the last twenty minutes looked at me waiting for a response.

“That’s fantastic, congratulations on closing the deal.” You responded enthusiastically, faking it like an orgasm during bad sex. 

Sipping on the glass of wine he ordered, trying not to grimace at the taste and wondering for the umpteenth time what is it with men your age? Why did they feel entitled to decide what to order you without asking?

Now in your early forties you prefer men like your alcohol, on the younger side with an adventurous edge.

Tuning out ummm, David as he continues to prattle on about his whatever. He seems like a nice guy, kinda reminds you of that character from Pleseantville, the husband who kept saying where’s my dinner.

“Excuse me, I’m sorry to interrupt your evening, but I need to speak to Ms. Y/L/N.” You both turn to see who is addressing you.

 Fuck me, he’s here.

He and his partner, Agent Dean Smith, showed up your workplace this morning about the weird event in HR department. They had every red blooded woman, and a few of the guys, drooling in their lattes. 

After your interview with Agent Smith, who’d been flirting with everyone female with a pulse during their interviews, he asked you for drinks and whatever.

It had been extremely tempting, he was ridiculously good looking with those succulent full lips, green eyes, bowed just enough for you to fit perfectly between legs and cinnamon freckles that made you wonder if he’s covered everywhere in them.

You hated to admit it’s been to damn long since any man has giving you such a through fucking, you know, the type that makes your legs shake uncontrollably when you cum and walk funny for days.

You had reluctantly..very reluctantly.. turned him down. The reason being the man standing behind you.

“And who might you be?” Ralph maybe, asks rudely.

 Agent Samuel Wesson flashes his FBI credentials at possibly John before turning to addresses you. He’s delicious, literally walking sex with those long, long legs.

“Ms. Y/L/N, could we go somewhere more private? I have some questions that need clarification.”  Unable to answer because your brain has migrated to your pussy that’s dripping wet from the sound of his deep, whiskey-honey voice alone.

Crossing your legs you clenched your thighs together trying to cover your down south problem but he tracks your movement with those indelible, fox slanted eyes and smirks.

Shit.

“Look, I don't care if your President...” Steve, IDK, says standing up to get in his face but falls short, literally, by several inches.

Biting on the inside of your cheek to stop bursting out in laughter you take a sip of the horrid wine to compose yourself because there is absolutely no way in hell your going to pass up on the opportunity to make time with this gorgeous mountain of a man who’s literally made you cum without even touching you. 

Standing up you insert yourself between them and play with Donny’s tie. “I’m so sorry, we were having such a good time, and I was thinking of asking you back to mine, but I’d feel awful if I know something and didn't help, please don't be mad at me.” You pout a bit, pretending to actually sound sorry, all the while internally cringing at the fucking drivel spewing out of your mouth to mollify whatchamacallit.

If anyone had asked you how you thought this night would have ended, never in a million would you have said that you’d be reclining on the hood of a ‘67 Impala in an empty field splitting a bottle of Knob Creek Whiskey with Samual Wesson, IE Sam Winchester, discussing everything from politics to debating if GOT’s ending was screwed up while stargazing.

Sam takes a long pull off the bottle before handing it back, “Why did you turn Dean down?” He inquires.

“I’ve been around long enough to know a player when I see one,” you take a long pull from the bottle, “and I’ve reached an age where I don’t and won’t be played.” You answer honestly handing the bottle to Sam.

He’s taking a drink when you cheekily add, “Besides, he’s too old for me.”

Coughing from the whiskey going down the wrong way Sam finally croaks out, “To old? He’s three years younger than you.” You raise an eyebrow at that.

“You know how old I am?” 

Sam starts peeling off the bottles label, “Yeah, I do. I checked out everyone who had any connection to the victim. I didn’t think you’d be interested, Dean’s well...Dean. Women are always attracted to him but then he said you turned him down and....”

“...you followed me to that bar hoping to get lucky?” It’s hard to see under the moonlight but you know he’s blushing, “I’ll admit it was sorely tempting but I turned Dean down because you're more my type.” Sam looked up in surprise. 

You shift towards him reaching for the bottle, “Look, I like younger men, it's my thing and I find I have more in common with them. Nobody thinks twice about some old fart fucking a twenty something, but if an older woman is sexually adventurous, oh my god everyone goes spar! Lots of younger men today prefer being with someone who’s life doesn’t revolve around kids, can hold an intellectual conversation and isn’t looking to put a ring on it.

I came across this British blogger in her fifties dating men in their twenties and they were the ones doing the chasing. She came up with this new term for women like us, W.H.I.P-Women who are Hot, Intelligent and in their Prime. Fucking better than that old, tired, cliche Cougar.” 

Sam ruminants over what you said, “So sexually adventurous...ever do it on an Impala?” He asks with a lascivious grin.

”Nuh-uh,“ you answer running your tongue teasingly around the bottles lip before taking a drink. 

Sam's eyes dilate as he pulls the bottle away, brushing his lips against yours to taste the whiskey lingering on them.

Opening your mouth you catch his bottom lip, sucking on it as he tangles his hands into your hair, deepening the kiss as you work at opening the buttons of his shirt. Pushing against Sam's chest he sits back a bit so you can remove it before shifting him fully onto his back, allowing you to straddle his narrow hips and making your skirt ride up revealing your cheekster panties

Sam slips his hand between your obscenely spread thighs, roughly palming your clit through the material making you hiss, reaching to pull his hand away before your cumming to fast. He takes hold your ass in both of his big hands grips tightly pulling and pushing, making you roughly glide over his rapidly filling cloth covered cock. He’s keeping you right on edge but not allowing you to cum, the friction from the grinding eliciting moans from both of you. He sits both of you upright suddenly, gripping your shirts hem lifting it off revealing your bare breasts to him.

Sam bends forward taking your left nipple between his lips sucking on it then bits down hard enough you cry out from the pain/pleasure of it. Tangling both your hands in his hair you tug until he switches breasts to give the same treatment to your other nipple. Dragging him off your chest you resume kissing him hard, both of you start fighting for dominance.

Reaching down you unzip his pants, dipping your hand in to caress him. Sam's head drops back with a groan, exposing his neck. Your lips travel down his throat, stopping, sucking a bruise just above his collarbone.

Sliding backwards off the cars hood you finish stripping him until he's lying completely naked, legs wantonly spread out across the hood. You watch him grip his cock stroking himself as you discard the last of your own clothes before climbing back on the car.

“You’re stunning,” Sam breathily says stroking himself harder.

Keeping eye contact you place your hand over his, guiding him down to firmly grip the base of his twitching cock to steady it as you move your hands around on the hood to balance yourself, bending over to flick your tongue along the underside of his shaft up to that specific sensitive area, your tongue teasing the nerves there, making Sam shiver and noisily start panting before slowly sliding up to the slit, lapping at the precum leaking from the tip before wrapping your lips around his cock and start steadily bobbing up and down, taking his ample cock as deep as you can without gagging.

“Oh fuck yesss..feels so good,” Sam moans out as his muscles jerk from the way your tongue is moving over his cock that’s suctioned tight in your mouth.

Pulling off you stroke your hand up and down his long, thick shaft, twisting towards the tip while watching Sam massage his balls.

Sam's head thunks against the windshield as his breaths coming out harsh and broken, hips bucking wildly around from the combined stimulation.

“Fuckingfuck... fuuuu...gonna…’ was all the warning he gives before spilling hot liquid over your fingers and spurting onto the Impalas hood, painting it with white splatters as you continue stroking lightly with your cum covered fingers, easing him through the aftershocks till Sam reaches down pulling you off, to sensitive for anymore touching.

Sitting up Sam cups your cheeks in his big hands staring intently at you with lust blown chameleon eyes. “How the fuck did you do that, I haven’t cum that fast since puberty.”

Instead of saying anything, you insert your cum covered fingers one by one into you mouth, sucking and licking till your hands clean of his spending. He wraps his big hand around your wrist pulling your hand away and deeply kisses you, tasting himself in your mouth. 

“Backseat now.” He growls getting off the hood and still holding your wrist gathers the discarded clothes with his other hand before dragging you with him around the car.

Opening the door he urges you to slide across the bench seat until you lying back against the other door legs spread wide to accommodate him as he’s climbing between them, somehow fitting his immense frame in the car.

Sam runs his long, slender fingers along the inside of your thighs, over your hips and stomach, studying every tremble and shiver to his touch moving to lightly stroke between your folds, inserting two fingers into your soaked channel searching for that spot. “Hmmm..” You moan out as Sam finds it.

Somehow he amazingly folds himself up and spreading his fingers to stretch your opening to delve his tongue into your core wanting a taste while continuing to stroke your thighs and hips with his other hand to keep you stimulated.

“Fuuuccckk,” the only warning you can give as you climax.

Sam adjusts the movements of his hand to keep working your swollen g spot, pushing you towards another orgasm.

The car fills with the wet squelching sounds with his fingers moving in and out of your drooling cunt as nonsensical noises come out of your mouth at the same time. 

“Uhhh...to much….can’t…”  your barley able to pant out pushing on the seat back trying to get some leverage to move away from him.

“Yes you can, cum for me again, I want to see you squirt, ruin the seat.” Sam growls out pinning both of your hands in his left one against the doors window.

You can feel it starting deep inside, begging for release, but your massively overstimulated and your body keeps fighting it.

 “Just let go, I know you can,” Sam says in a calm, level voice, stark contrast to his animalistic actions, “let it happen…let go!” Your bodies shaking violently, hips thrusting up off the seat as your orgasm hits so hard you silently scream, your inner muscles spasming your release, flooding over his wrist and hand onto the leather seat below.

He briefly continues the steady movement of his fingers then gently pulls them out as your walls continue clenching around nothing.

Releasing your hands he picks up your discarded skirt wiping your overused pussy tenderly, cleaning you up as much as possible before lifting your hips and placing the old army blanket on the seat and lying down behind you spoons your quivering body till it’s calmed.

 “You ok?” He asks softly stroking your arm, soothing you. “Yeah, better than ok,” you drowsily murmur, “what possessed you to recreate the night we meet?”

“Wanted to do something special for our fourth anniversary.” He lovingly replies nuzzling your neck.

 “And your birthday,” you feel Sam make a face at being reminded he is now thirty-six. “Why is this one bothering you, they never have before.”

 “Its stupid,” he sighs, making you turn your head enough to look at him. “Dean noticed that grey hair and..”

“..gave you shit about it. You could ignore him.”

“Mission impossible, it’s Dean” Sam says, sighing again.

“Hmm, well then there's only one option...Winchester him.” You say looking serious.

Sam smiles at your suggestion. It had been to damn long since he had pranked Dean and payback was way overdue. 

“See, with age comes wisdom, grasshopper”

[galadrieljones]

11 questions

tagged by @thevikingwoman. thank you!!

1. The most beautiful place you have been 

Ah, a tough one. To me, there is nothing more sublime than the big, wide open empty of the American West. Montana, Idaho, Wyoming, Yellowstone and the Grand Tetons. Utah, and the weird hellscapes of northern Nevada. BUT, on our honeymoon, we went to France: flew into Bergerac and slowly drove north to Paris over the course of several days. The sunflower fields were in full bloom and it was really something else. I also have to say that, while I don’t always love where I live in Orange County, the sunsets in Laguna Beach really are the prettiest sunsets in the whole world.

2. Pick a super power. Why that one? 

Not no sleep, but just less sleep. I’d love it if I could subsist on just like four hours a night. I’d get so much more done that way!! Lol.

3. Do you have a comfort movie or show? What is it? 

Yes, I have several comfort shows. My most frequented are probably Gilmore Girls, Buffy, and Dawson’s Creek. Right now, on maternity leave, I’m also taking a GREAT deal of comfort in Beat Bobby Flay lol. Idk, I just really like him!!

4. A creation you’re really proud of?

All of my fanfic I’m very proud of. I feel it keeps getting better with every work. I’m very proud of having finished The Dead Season, but I feel like, in terms of writing and storytelling skill, A Funeral feels like my most honed creation so far. 

5. Something you are looking forward to in the next year or two?

Well, I just had a baby eight days ago, so I’m looking forward to getting back to normal!!

6. Top 5 video games?

The order here can tend to fluctuate based on where my emotional attachment lies on any given day, but I’ll be as “objective” as possible. Also I have six because the first two I consider to be a tie:

The Last of Us - This is one of my favorite games because it’s so tightly woven, as a story. The characters and their relationships, in combination with the setting and high stakes horrific atmosphere makes it feel both terrifying and desperate in almost EVERY moment. There is ALWAYS something to lose, and Joel’s longterm character development is both very unique and also extremely realistic, nuanced, and heartbreaking.

Red Dead Redemption 2 - This game, for me, succeeds on the strength of its protagonist. The game itself is beautiful, meandering, dynamic, and the story, while sprawling, is multi-faceted and really advanced in its usage of POV, symbolism, and ambiguity. It’s impossible for me to choose between RDR2 and TLoU because they’re such different games. There really is nothing like RDR2, and there is no protagonist like Arthur Morgan, but the narrative of TLoU is just so...perfect. Overall, I think protagonists like Joel and Arthur are sort of paving the way for games that are much more “adult” in scope. These are the first two games I’ve ever really played that feel exclusively BY adults and FOR adults. 

Skyrim - I can’t even really qualify my love for this game at this point in my life. It’s like comfort food. It’s like coming home.

Dragon Age: Inquisition - It’s an imperfect game, but it’s big and the characters are wonderful. I get lost in the banter, the background dynamics, the politics, and the wealth of opportunity for OC creation and fan works.

Horizon: Zero Dawn - Aloy is such a unique female protagonist, in that she is almost a Byronic Hero. Female Byronic heroes are really rare, and I think I love her for her secret romance, masked with a hefty layer of sarcasm, bitterness, and self-preservation. I love Aloy’s journey, because it begins with one quest (find the men who attacked the Proving and killed Rost) and then becomes a much more existential quest (Aloy’s discovery of her own origin story). The game itself is good, but I think if a sequel is made, it’s going to be fucking REALLY GOOD.

Bloodbourne - I’ve never actually played Bloodbourne lol but I’ve watched my husband play it twice. It is by far the weirdest game, aesthetically, I’ve ever encountered. The bizarre menstrual symbolism and hidden zones are entirely gnarly and beautiful. And I love the storytelling style of Hidetaka Miyazaki, how it’s all shown, or implied. There are no quest markers, no obvious objectives. Entire worlds can be missed through happenstance, or failing to fully investigate one small mystery to its painstaking conclusion. 

7. A recent favorite anything (food/entertainment/clothing/??)

As previously stated, I’m very into Beat Bobby Flay lately lol. Dude, Bobby Flay is entirely 100% the man. He is both calmly confident and entirely accomplished as a chef, but also extremely gracious toward his challengers and always willing to concede the loss (though he usually wins lol). That kind of humble confidence is...rare. He reminds me of that thing Solas says in DAI: “No real god need prove himself.”

8. Favorite board game?

I know it’s old school, but I really love Risk. I like playing with my husband, because he’s VERY good, but I learn a lot from him, and though I have only beat him maybe one time ever lol I usually take him by surprise a few times during the game, and that’s very fun lol.

9. Stealing this one: I know that lots of people have “dinosaur” or “ancient Egypt” interests as a child; what was something that you were super interested in as a child? I’d love to learn a new fact about that subject if you’re willing!

When I was a CHILD, I had a definite elves and fairies phase, as well as a metaphysical time travel/scifi phase. My favorite books, which I would read constantly over and over again were Afternoon of the Elves by Janet Taylor Lisle (which has no *actual* elves in it--the elves are like metaphors, honestly explains a lot about my tendency toward fabulism rather than actual fantasy) and A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L’Engle. Looking back, I still see these books and how they manifest in my preferences today. They really blur genre boundaries--between fantasy, science, and domestic realism. They’re about kids having regular kid problems and often experiencing catharsis via “fantasy” worlds. 

10. A strange thing you googled recently, if you’re willing to share. 

Well, I’ve googled a lot of strange things lately. When you have a new baby, you’re always googling strange things lol. But I’d say, in the past few months, the strangest thing I’ve had to google was basically male and female underwear from the late 1800s. What the fuck does Arthur wear under his pants?? What the fuck is Mary Beth hiding under that skirt?? The most alarming thing I discovered was that women typically wore crotchless drawers around this time. This way they could pee without having to completely remove their myriad of skirts lol 

11. You only put ten questions, so I’ll steal a simple one from the previous batch, ie: Five favorite books! I’ve been thinking about some of them lately, so I wanna share:

Lonesome Dove by Larry McMurtry

The Road by Cormac McCarthy

Tender Morsels by Margo Lanagan

Airships: Stories by Barry Hannah

Cannery Row by John Steinbeck

I’ll tag @buttsonthebeach @morgan-arthur @ladylike-foxes @bearly-tolerable @wrenbee @lyrium-lovesong @ma-sulevin @a-shakespearean-in-paris @hidinginthehinterlands and @idrelle-miocovani

Questions:

Five favorite books?

Five favorite video games?

Favorite visual artist(s) (fan artists and/or traditional)?

Favorite video game protagonist (non-OC) and why?

What’s the best meal you’ve ever eaten?

What’s your dream road trip? Or, if you don’t like road trips, what’s your dream vacation?

Do you like old movies? I’m talking OLD movies, like golden era, from the 1930s-1950s. Why or why not? Do you have a favorite?

What’s something unique and interesting about the place where you live and/or grew up?

If you were going to be transported into the setting of any video game, which would it be and why?

Regardless of where you actually live, would you prefer urban, suburban, small town, or rural living?

What is the most emotional you’ve ever gotten over a video game?

[otomeonfleek]

Request: Date Night w/ Eisuke Ichinomiya ft. Eito

Anonymous said:Request little eito is attached to mc and eisuke want to spend some time with mc alone cuddling but in the end the three of them end up cuddling

---------

After a century of patience, I have procured this lil bit from the recesses of my scattered mind. Ta-da lol. This is not exactly what you requested, but I do hope you enjoy it ahhh. There are elements of cuddle in there. 

Requests are open and I slowly shall continue to answer them. To the general ppl, please feel free to send some in! I write for any of the Voltage Inc games (ie. IYAT, BMP). Lol not just KBTBB, they just happen to be poppin in my requests. 

Be on the lookout for my next fics. One is another KBTBB request w/ Soryu (angsty) and the other will be a sweeter one w/ Makoto from MLFK (My Last First Kiss). 

-------------------

After giving birth, it took ages for you to reach a point in which you felt nearly comfortable in your newest position as a mother. It had been impossible to detach yourself from your precious son’s side. 

You felt pride in how the following years led to a progression of confidence in your mothering abilities and the knowledge that Eito was not made of glass. Even greater was your husband’s relief that you were gradually learning to ease up on the immense pressure you forced on yourself. 

“What if something happens?” 

“I swear I can hear him crying!” 

“That fabric is too rough for him.” 

“This isn’t the brand he likes.” 

“I think I’ll just stay home with him. He’s not ready yet.” 

These days, you were making it a point to implement changes to better balance your life. As a treat, you and Eisuke were due for a date night. 

Standing at the doorway, the billionaire hotel magnate tucked his cuff back to glance at his silver Rolex with an exasperated frown. “Babe, we’re going to be late.” He clicks his tongue with a soft sigh when he notes how cemented to your place you are. 

On the other side of the room is you crouched onto your haunches and clutching your toddler’s tiny arms. Despite donning an elegant white designer dress and having your flowing locks styled into curls, you ignore it all in favor of tending to your son’s pout. 

“...B-But, I don’t want you to go.” The mini-version of your glaring partner has a lost expression, his (e/c) orbs bubbling with unshed tears. It is the thought of being without you that makes his heart hurt and especially confuses him. 

You sniffle, trying to bite back the sobs threatening to escape you. Him garbed in a dainty and gray polo shirt and khakis is too precious. This rather preppy and adultish outfit is such a contrast with his child-like expression. You are nearly tempted to abandon date night in favor of cooing over your son. However, you can practically feel his father cursing you. 

This evening has been marked on your calendar for weeks and there would undeniably be hell to pay if you cancelled now. Regardless of whether the older male would admit, you knew that he had been looking forward to some proper alone time. 

It was undeniable that Eisuke treasured Eito and throughout your pregnancy could be found simply sitting in the nursery. There had been a handful of times when he would gently hold your hand or press a slow kiss to the crown of your head and thank you for making him a father. 

However, time to yourselves still was necessary and had been rare for months. 

Sighing, you squeeze Eito’s pudgy arms and smile. “Aww, I’m sorry sweetie. Mommy and Daddy are just going to be gone for a little bit. For now, you get to play with your uncles!” You tilt your head and point at his odd assortment of playmates in the form of overgrown men that are scattered around the penthouse. When the child turns to stare, the bidders mostly fidget while Baba shoots a grin. 

“Yeah, little man! We can stay up to watch a bunch of Disney movies like Cars and eat candy! Doesn’t that sound fun, Soryu?” The fedora-donning male turns his mischievous eyes to the mobster sitting at the edge of one of the leather couches. 

Feeling awkward, Soryu scratches the back of his head nervously and fights back a glare for the sake of not frightening his godson. “Right...” 

In an opposite corner, both the slacker and Angelic prince snicker at the sad display.

Instead of jumping on board, the youngest turns red and cries “Don’t leave, Mommy!!” When you try to stand up, his tiny fingers instantly grip at and wrinkle the lower hem of your skirt.

Before you say a word, Eisuke bounds across the room and carefully yet firmly separates your child’s hands from your dress. He deftly scoops Eito into his arms and lowers his head to meet his gaze, “Now we have to go or Mommy and Daddy will be late. We don’t want that, do we?” 

After a small pause, your son shakes his head in agreement. 

“Good. I need you to make sure your uncles don’t get in trouble. Especially your Uncle Luke.” At that, everyone’s sight trails to the unconscious form of the lengthy blonde curled up into a ball on a love seat. Mumbling phrases like “(Y/N)...tasty clavicles...Oh no, Eisuke...” the doctor never fails to worry everyone. 

With his father’s gentle maneuvering, Eito nods eagerly. “I’ll take care of everyone!!” He cheers, a look of determination and glee taking over. In that moment, your son is the spitting image of you. Eager to take on a challenge and happy to help. 

Smiling crookedly, the brunette ruffles his son’s locks with an affectionate look and places him down, “I know you will.” 

After pressing a kiss on your son’s cherub-like cheek and thanking the bidders again for their help, you take your husband’s arm and are on the way out. 

You however pause when Eito calls out, “Don’t forget to come back!” 

Noting your trembling heart again, Eisuke sighs and practically drags you away. 

“He needs me!!” 

“(Y/N), the guys are with him.” 

“They don’t know how he likes to be cuddled!” 

“...We made these reservations months ago.” 

“Eisuke, they’re watching Cars.” 

“Goddamn it, we can watch Cars and cuddle with him anytime!!” 

“Then, how about now?” 

“...” 

“Fine, but we better be home by 9:00pm.” 

[nochuobsessed]

Reign || Pt 17

Reign Masterlist

Word Count: 3.7k

Groups: BTS, EXO, Blackpink, Twice

Au: Royal

Pairing: Baekhyun x Reader, Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Angst | Fluff | Smut | Au

Warnings: Smut, Death, cute children and fluffy fluff fluff

2 years later…

“Y/N wake up.”

You whined at your husbands request, rolling away from him. Jungkook laughed and pulled you back to him.

“Good morning,” He says, turning you around to face him.

“Good morning my love,” You say, pecking his nose before rolling over again. Jungkook pulled you to him once more, tickling your sides, making you giggle.

“Jeon Jungkook!” You squeal, using all your power to throw yourself on top of him, straddling him and holding his hands down, “Who’s in charge now?”

Jungkook raised his eyebrows, before pulling you under him and swapping positions. He leaned forward and brought his lips yours, one of his hands cupping your cheek.

“Two years of waking up like this,” You say, his lips moving to your neck, making you let out a whimper, “Morning sex? Really?”

“Are you still sore from last night my love?” Jungkook smirked, grinding against your core.

“I’m still sore from a week ago,” You say, breathing deeply to enjoy your husbands assault on your neck.

“So is that a no to sex?” Jungkook asked, pulling away from you.

“When have I ever said no?” You ask, pulling him back to you. He slowly let his body fall on yours, tangling your legs with his.

You stop when the door opens, Jungkook quickly lying down next to you, letting you lean against his shoulder. You quickly jumped out of bed when you saw who it was.

“Eomma!”

“Oh my darling boy,” You coo, taking your son from Jihyo, “Come have cuddles with Eomma and Appa.”

“As soon as he woke up, he was calling out for you,” Jihyo explains, “And I know how much you love mornings with him.”

“Thank you, Jihyo,” You say, kissing your sons nose and bouncing him in your arms. His small hands reached out for his father, and you carried him to the bed, setting him down in between the two of you.

“Appa,” he giggled, as his father pat his head.

“Jihan, my little Prince,” Jungkook says, lifting him into his lap.

Jihan was absolutely perfect. He had your hair and his fathers eyes, the softest slightly tanned skin and perfect cupid bow lips. Your pregnancy was hard, but it was all worth it when you laid eyes on Jihan.

You leaned into your husband, playing with Jihans small hands, “My baby boy, you’re turning one soon!”

Jihan started blabbing, trying to say something along the lines of “Jihan one.”

“Almost, my son, almost,” Jungkook said, pressing a kiss to your sons head, “Eomma is planning a big party for you, to celebrate your birthday.”

Jihan giggled, and reached out for your hair, playing with strands. You sighed in happiness, looking at your perfect family. You kissed your sons hand, as he tried to move into your lap.

“Jihan-ie, we need to get you dressed for the day,” You say, lifting your son up into your arms, “We have to go to breakfast, and then go to morning court.”

Jihan squealed in excitement, waving his arms around, slightly hitting your stomach. You laughed and got out of bed, a shirtless Jungkook still lying down, admiring you and his son.

You walked over to your wardrobe with Jihan in your arms, “What colour will you wear today Jihan?” You ask, showing him his side of the clothing, “Blue?”

He pointed to the gold coats, and you smiled at him, “Should Eomma and Appa wear gold too?”

He nodded ferociously, and you handed him the outfit. Your ladies entered the room, ready to dress you. Jungkook got out of bed, taking Jihan from you to help him get ready.

Once the three of you were dressed, all in matching colours, you made your way to breakfast.

“Your Highnesses,” people said as the three of you passed. You held Jihan on your hip, Jungkook entertaining the small child.

You often thought it was scary how much alike they were. The facial expressions that the 8 month old pulled were identical to those that your husband would. You loved it, seeing this perfect replica of the man you loved in the child you gave birth to.

“Eomma,” Jihan asked, dramatically pointing to his mouth, giving you the cutest look that the baby could muster.

“Yes my prince,” You say, your heart bursting with love as he lay his head on your shoulder, “We are getting food.”

Jungkook poked your son’s nose lightly, making him laugh. You entered the dining room, placing Jihan in the wooden high chair Jungkook had made for him.

“His teeth should start growing soon,” You say, sitting down in between the two boys, “It’ll be painful for him. And for me while breastfeeding.”

“He is a Jeon,” Jungkook says proudly, “He will get through it.”

You smiled at you husband, “He is our son.”

“Where is my grandson?”

“Yah!”

You carried a happy Jihan to the King, kissing him on the forehead and letting him sit in his Grandfathers lap.

“See this throne?” Junghoon said, capturing the 8 month olds attention, “You will sit on this throne one day, after-“

“Father,” Jungkook calls out, holding you in front of him, his arms around your waist, “He’s too young.”

“Ah,” Junghoon said, “I understand. Jihan, I need you to listen very closely. Can you do that for me?”

Jihan looked back to you, “Eomma!”

You raised a finger to your lips, urging him to listen. Jihan had bad separation anxiety. You had tried getting him to spend more time with others, but nothing worked. Not that you and Jungkook minded, he was still very young.

“Grandma and I are going on a trip tomorrow,” Junghoon says, trying to calm Jihan down, “We won’t be back for a while.”

“EOMMA!”

You and Jungkook quickly ran to your son, picking him up from a startled Junghoon.

“Father,” You say, “I’m sorry he’s like this-“

“Jungkook was exactly the same when he was little,” Hyeyeon says, “We expected it.”

Jihan clung to your dress, resting his head under yours. You looked at Jungkook, and he bowed to his parents, before leading you out of the room.

You took Jihan to the gardens, setting him on your lap.

“Will your parents be gone long?” You ask, stroking your sons hair. It hurt you to see him so distressed, but you knew it was common for babies his age.

Jungkooks eyes were on Jihan, watching his son closely, “Only a few days. They want to visit my aunt. We’ve been named regent, as usual.”

“Another day of playing King and Queen,” You say, leaning on Jungkook, “Everything is so tiring.”

“You always power through it, my love,” Jungkook says, kissing your cheek, “We must, for him.”

You bring a cooing Jihan into your arms, cradling him, “We are so blessed to have him. Our own angel.”

“We could have another,” Jungkook said, looking at you seriously.

You tilt your head, “Another one, already? It hasn’t even been a year and he’s still so young.”

“He would have a sibling to grow up with-“

“We don’t need another baby, Kook,” You say, kissing the top of Jihan’s head, “Not yet.”

Jungkook nodded, “But we will have another right? I know the pregnancy was hard but-“

“I am sure we will,” You say, “We are trying to raise Jihan, he needs our full attention. He must be our number one priority.”

“And he is,” Jungkook says, looking over his son, “We should get him inside, it’s too cold for him.”

You nod, standing up and following Jungkook back inside.

“Can you say, King?”

“Key.”

“Queen?”

“Key.”

You laughed at your husbands failed attempts to teach your son new words. You were both sitting on the floor, with Jihan sitting happily in your lap.

Jungkook poked your sons cheeks, emitting a laugh from the baby, “Can you say, Prince?”

“Pin.”

“What about Princess?”

“Eomma.”

You gasped over dramatically at Jihan, moving your forward to face him, “Eomma?”

“Eomma!” Jihan said, his hand pointing at your crown.

You clapped for him, with your arms holding him in place, “My clever boy! Oh Jihan-ie you are so smart. You might even be smarter than Uncle Namjoon.”

“Nay?” Jihan asked, referring to Naeyeon. She had delivered him during your labor, and had been his physician since birth.

“No not Naeyeon, Namjoon,” Jungkook correcting Jihan, “Can you say, Jungkook?”

“Appa!” He said, throwing his arms in the air. Jungkook laughed at his son, the two having identical smiles on their, minus the fact that Jihan was yet to grow teeth.

“Jihan-ie,” You said, grabbing your son’s attention, “Can you say Y/N?”

“Eomma?” He asked, his face falling. You tapped his nose, before placing a kiss over it. Jungkook looked at you in adoration, as you took Jihan’s hands in yours, waving them from side to side. Your eyes met Jungkook’s while you were mid laugh, Jihan realizing you had stopped playing with him to gaze at his appa.

“Eomma, Appa!” He squealed, crawling out of your lap and sitting in between the two of you.

When you first found out you were with child, you and Jungkook decided that you would raise him properly. You would feed him from the breast, not hire a wet nurse to do it for you. He wouldn’t have a Nanny, but grow up with his parents always there for him.

Jungkook leaned forward, kissing you whilst lightly placing a hand on Jihan’s head. The baby let out a giggle, grabbing your attention.

“My two boys,” You say, tickling your sons chin, “I love you both so much.”

“Luh?” Jihan said, looking to Jungkook, and then to you.

“Yes Jihan,” You say, smiling widely at your child, “Love.”

You lay in bed that night, Jungkook’s head lying on your stomach, playing with his hair. Jihan had gone to bed earlier, and you were left with your husband.

“Y/N,” Jungkook said, enjoying you playing with his hair, “Why were you so against having another child?”

You sighed, “I am only 19. We still have a while until we become King and Queen. We have our heir, there are many royal families with only one child. Besides, it hasn’t even been a year since I gave birth. If you knew the pain you’d never want to have another child.”

“But I want another, soon,” Jungkook says, “A Princess.”

“A Princess?”

“So that we have a complete set,” He explains, drawing random patterns on your stomach, “I do not want to be an old King with young children. I want to spend time with our children before our soul focus becomes the Kingdom.”

You sighed, “I love our family as it is. Another child would mean less time for Jihan.”

“Can we at least try?” Jungkook says, “You might not get pregnant. We were trying for a half a year before we had Jihan.”

You pressed your lips to his, your hand running through his locks, “Okay.”

Jungkook looked at you in surprise, “Okay?”

“Hurry up before I change my mind,” You say, lying back down on the bed.

Jungkook moved so he was hovering above you. He softly pressed his lips to yours, barely getting to feel his plump lips. You brought your head forward, your tongue swiping across his bottom lip. His body fell on yours, sensually grinding against you.

Your lips moved to his neck, sucking on the skin, making sure to leave a mark. His hand went up your bed gown, grabbing hold of your breasts. You broke apart from him, your hand going down his pants, bringing his cock out of its jail. You gave it a few pumps, spreading the precum against his slit, making him letting out a groan.

His hand moved down to cup your heat, running his finger up and down your slit. He pulled your dress up and off your body, pulling off his pants straight after. It was a rare occasion that Jungkook wore a shirt to bed, as he usually used you as a form of warmth.

He looked at you, before helping you into a sitting position, “Ride me.”

You looked around awkwardly at your husbands request, “Very funny.” He had never wanted you to do that before

Jungkook pressed his lips to your collarbone, “Really.”

You raised your eyebrows, before pushing him down flat on the bed. You hovered above him, aligning his cock in your entrance. You guided him until he was right underneath you, and you slowly sunk down on him.

You sucked in a breath as he stretched your walls. You sunk down on him completely, before starting to bounce up and down.

Jungkooks eyes were glued to your breasts, watching them move as though they had a mind of their own. His groaned as he lay there, his hands around your hips, holding tightly enough to leave a bruise. He loved having his way with you, fucking you until you couldn’t scream any longer. But he loved this. Making love to you. Making a child through your love for each either.

Jungkook held your hips up, before thrusting up, each thrust perfectly timed with you.

“I love you,” You moan, placing your hands on his chest, leaning on the hardened muscle underneath you.

“I love you too,” He said, his thrusts getting faster and hitting your g-spot perfectly.

You kept going, and you felt the knot in your stomach tighten.

“Baby,” Jungkook panted, “Are you close?”

You leaned forward, capturing his lips with yours, “Cum with me my love.”

You clenched around him, your orgasm overtaking you as Jungkook spilled his seed into your womb.

Catching your breath, you lifted yourself off him, lying down next to him. He tangled his legs with yours, running his hands soothingly down your back.

“I hope you’re pregnant with our Princess,” Jungkook says, pressing a kiss to your stomach.

You giggled, “I’m not pregnant yet, my love.”

“But you will be,” He says, rubbing his nose against yours lightly.

You kiss his jaw, before he placed his head on your chest and closed his eyes.

You did the same, hoping that tomorrow would come quickly.

But it was not to be.

“Jihan’s awake,” You mumble, hearing your babies cry from the room connected to yours.

“Who’s turn is it?” Jungkook asks, rolling his face into your chest more.

“It’s mine… But if I walk your cum could-“

Jungkook sat up, pulling his pants on and throwing you your gown. You slipped it on, watching Jungkook leave the room. You propped your pillow up, leaning on it before Jungkook walked back into the room, holding a teary eyed Jihan in his arms.

“Jihan my baby!” You called, holding your arms out for your son.

Jihan sniffled, as Jungkook handed him over to you.

“Eomma,” He cried, holding onto you for dear life.

“I think he had a bad dream,” Jungkook says, rubbing his sons back, “Jihan, did you have a nightmare?”

Jihan kept crying, and you looked at Jungkook in desperation, “Sing the song.”

The song, was one that Jungkook had sang to you whilst you were in labor. It calmed you down, and became your secret weapon for times when Jihan was upset.

Jungkook took you and Jihan into his arms, rocking you back and forth, “nunkkocci tteoreojyeoyo, ttojogeumssik meoreojyeoyo, bogo sipda bogo sipda, bogo sipda bogo sipda, eolmana gidaryeoya, tto myeot bameul deo saewoya, neol boge doelkka neol boge doelkka, mannage doelkka mannage doelkka.” Jungkook looked over your shoulder, smiling when he saw that Jihan was fast asleep, “He can sleep with us tonight.”

You nodded, handing Jihan to Jungkook as you got comfy under the covers. Jihan was placed next to you, and you bought him closer so you were cuddling him. Jungkook lay across from you, holding both in a somewhat protective stance.

“I love you, my family,” Jungkook said, feeling happy that both you and Jihan were in his arms.

“I love you too,” you whisper, falling asleep with the two that you love the most around you.

Jungkook woke up earlier than you that morning. Jihan was awake and sitting on his chest, playing with his hair.

“Jihan-ie,” Jungkook cooed, pulling his son close to him and pecking his head, “You’re awake before us.”

“Appa,” he blabbed, seeming to have a conversation with himself. Jungkook loved watching his son just exist, as a baby he would do so many strange things. He turned to you, “Eomma?”

Jungkook quickly hushed his son, “Jihan-ie, don’t wake Eomma up yet. Eomma is tired from last night. We must let her sleep.” Jihan pulled a pouty face, looking at his father sadly. Jungkook lifted Jihan up and out of the bed, getting him dressed before setting him down on the bed to get changed himself, “Jihan, should we go say goodbye to grandpa and grandma?”

Jihan nodded at Jungkook happily, who placed a kiss to your forehead, before taking Jihan out of the room.

Jungkook watched his son in awe, seeing him bow his head briefly every time they passed someone.

“Jiho!” Jihan called out, seeing his mother’s lady.

Jihyo curtsied to the two Princes, and approached them, “Good morning your highnesses, don’t you look dashing today Jihan!” Jihan giggled, as Jihyo made funny faces to entertain the young Prince, “Where is Y/N?”

“Sleeping,” Jungkook said, “We were up late with Jihan, he had a nightmare so we brought him into our room.”

Jihyo nodded in understanding, “I see. I should find the other ladies, enjoy your day your highnesses.”

“And you,” Jungkook says. Jihan waved goodbye to Jihyo, before grabbing onto Jungkooks ear and placing a sloppy kiss behind it.

Jungkook locked eyes with his son, before tickling him and placed him over his shoulders, “Thank you Jihan-ie.”

Jihan giggled and held on to his fathers head, entering the throne room.

“Jihan!” Hyeyeon called out, waving to her grandson from her throne, “You look very princely today.”

He giggled at his grandmother, who was dressed and ready to leave the castle, “Key!”

“Good boy Jihan!” Jungkook said, swooping him from his shoulder and into his arms.

“Where’s your eomma?” Hyeyeon asked the boy, glancing at Jungkook quickly, “I hardly ever see you without her.”

“Eomma!” Jihan called out, looking around, and then looking scared when he couldn’t see you, “Eomma?”

Jungkook smiled softly, and pat his head, “She’s still asleep, we had a late night last night.”

Hyeyeon raised her eyebrows at her son, who’s eyes widened, “Jihan woke up! We had to get him back to sleep.”

“Right,” Hyeyeon said, making Jungkook laugh awkwardly and Jihan letting out a squeal.

Junghoon came up behind his wife, taking her hand, “We should leave soon. Please tell Y/N that we said goodbye.”

“I’m here!” You called out, walking into the throne. You had woken up and seen that Jihan and Jungkook were gone, so you quickly thought to join them. You pecked Jungkook, tickling Jihan’s tummy, “Jihan-ie!”

“Eomma!” He excitedly said, leaning out of his fathers grip and into your arms. His arms wrapped around your neck, and you pressed a kiss to his nose, “You guys left me!”

Jungkook hugged you from the back, resting his head on your shoulder, “You looked so peaceful sleeping, love. I couldn’t wake you up.”

You nuzzled your head into his, smiling as Jihan blabbed nonsense to the King.

“We really must go,” Hyeyeon says, “The throne is yours.”

“Stay safe,” You say, smiling at your mother-in-law. Junghoon took her hand, and they left the room.

“Shall we?” Jungkook asks, holding his arm out for you. Your hand holds onto his arm, holding Jihan in the other.

You sat down on the blue velvet throne, your hand reaching over the gold arm rests to hold onto Jungkooks. Jihan happily sat in your lap, and the two of you began with the court proceedings.

“Prince Jungkook, Princess Y/N.”

“You forget to address our son,” Jungkook says to the nobleman, quirking up an eyebrow.

The nobleman bows again, “Prince Jihan.”

Jihan did not notice. A storm had been raging on for the past few hours, scaring the young Prince. He was clinging onto your dress, looking up at you with tear-stained cheeks. You kept him occupied, playing with his hair and pulling funny faces to cheer him up.

“Your highnesses, I have been supplying the Royal Family and Kingdom of Jeon food for years. The recent fires killed alot of my crops, I need new lands to grow grains. I humbly ask for your highnesses blessing to obtain more lands.”

Jungkook looked to you, and you subtly nodded, “Okay, we will have farm lands given to you. Expect the deed within a week.”

The nobleman got on one knee, and bowed, “Thank you your highnesses.” He left the room, and you sighed.

“How do your parents do this every day?” You ask, helping Jihan so he was standing on your legs, “He’ll be able to walk soon. He’s getting too big.”

Jungkook chuckled at your statement, “Jimin’s last letter said the same thing.”

“We really must get together sometime. Jihan hasn’t met his cousins yet.”

“We haven’t even met Sunmi,” Jungkook said, “Future Queen of Park.”

“He always used to go on about how he wanted a girl,” You say, “And we got our perfect little boy.”

Jihan reached a hand up to your cheek, lightly touching your earrings. You kissed his cheek, before nodding to the guards to let the next nobleman in.

The nobleman was accompanied by his own guards, and got on his knee and bowed.

“You work for my parents, don’t you?” Jungkook asked, “Why are you here?”

“Your majesties-“

“We are acting regents until the King and Queen come back,” You say, “We are still your highness.”

“You misunderstand me,” he says, looking at you in sorrow. You shifted Jihan so he was facing away from the nobleman, and beckoned for him to talk, “There was an accident.”

“An accident?” Jungkook said, looking to you in alarm, “Are they okay?”

“The carriage was on route to your aunts manor. The storm frightened the horses, and they bolted. The carriage sped up, before the horses got away, and they crashed. They died almost instantly.”

Jungkook froze, and you took his hand, “You mean, we’re…”

“You are now King and Queen of Jeon.”

[funkymbtifiction]

Hi Charity as you are an ENFP I wanted to ask you how to do you see Si and Te in you? How was it clear for you that you were Ne dom and Fi aux and not the contrary? You said in the past that you cinsidered yourself socially introvert or shy, which I think is my case and I'm not sure about INFP or ENFP for me. Thanks a lot

My main way of recognizing my status as an extrovert, beyond my need for external stimulation all the time (NOTHING HAS HAPPENED IN TEN MINUTES, MY LIFE SUCKS) is that I am not a Fi-dom. So excuse me, while I once again travel into the land of indecisive Ne to illustrate my point; then I will return to your initial question.

If you compare the INFPs on this blog to the ENFPs, you will notice that the INFP’s Fi is often very prominent and “runs the show.” This is also true with real life INFPs, who as judging dominants, have and express very strong opinions. Since they are in contact with their inner self most of the time, they often know what they like and dislike, what they want to do or refuse to do, and how they FEEL about most things. There is rarely indecision on that point, especially when it comes to the strength of their inner moral focus.

While I have extremely strong opinions in a few areas, in the broader scope of reality, I am far more indecisive and disconnected from my feelings, to the point where half the time, I rationalize them out with Te, or question my “right” to feel this way at all, rather than just use them. Something I admire about INFPs is they tend to be more decisive than I am, especially in their likes and dislikes. As a Ne-dom, my likes and dislikes can change from day to day.

An INFP I know had a fight with her friends once and door-slammed all of them. She knew how she felt, that they were dissing her opinions and not respecting her true self, and after she had enough, she was done. And she did not waffle on that decision. She just quit. She made up with them much later on, but only after her temper cooled, and she had space and time to mature in her own way (and they matured also). She knew what she wanted: them gone. For now.

I complained the other day to my mother about Elizabeth of York in Philippa Gregory’s novel / miniseries, The White Princess. She is so indecisive. She changes her mind from one chapter to the next about who she is, what she wants, and answers “I don’t know” to half the questions posed to her. Some days she likes her husband, some days she doesn’t; she intends to give up on him, then turns around and falls for him again. It’s seriously annoying.

Once I got done with my rant, my mother smiled and said, “So she’s basically you, in literary form.”

Gee, thanks mom.

My mouth hung open for a couple of seconds, while my Fi had a little tantrum, and then my Te immediately snapped in and I went: “I guess. But I’d make a BAD heroine. Heroines need to be decisive! Books need plots! Heroines need to know what they want, or at least figure it out, and get there, not be lost in indecision! The plot must move forward!”

Unlike me. =P

Ne-dom makes me changeable. And it annoys me. One day, I might want this. The next day, I might not. One day, I might decide that this friend sucks. The next day, I might think I was wrong and they’re awesome. They did not change. My Ne flipped the situation around for a different perspective. It runs right over my Fi and what it wants, all the time. This means that I either do not KNOW what I want or cannot ADMIT to myself what I want, nor give myself permission to want it. It annoys me, it annoys my parents, it annoys my friends, and it annoys my cat. But that’s how it is.

I WISH I had some Fi to haul Ne’s ass into a chair and decide: NOPE. But no, instead Ne hauls me around with Fi going “Um… I don’t know how I feel yet?”

But anyway, rant aside: back to your question.

How do I see Si and Te in me?

I see Te a lot when I ‘temporarily loop’ in order to avoid dealing with my feelings. I do not LIKE my feelings. I consider them a major pain in the butt. When my grandpa died, I was a wreck before it happened. I didn’t even know him that well, but it took him a long time to die. His organs slowly shut down. I was so immersed in the pain of what was happening to my loved ones, that I cried way more than any of them. But after his death, my Te immediately kicked in. Mom wanted to clear out his house. Like, immediately. That’s how she copes.

So we did. I put aside my emotions, went into that house, and went through all my grandparents’ stuff. We filled a dumpster. I organized everything we decided to keep in piles for the family to choose from after the funeral. A lot of my decisions were people-motivated – my cousins loved playing these games with Grandma. Shall we keep them? I’ll make sure they have all the pieces and put them in nice piles. I did the funeral video. Everyone needs a Ne-dom for that. It wasn’t just about Grandpa, it was about his life. His dreams. His parents. The culture he grew up in. I managed the voice-over, without falling to pieces.

And then, I moved on.

My Si is very poor. I may be adverse to CHANGE when people announce it (and I have to deal with it a lot, my parents literally cannot live six months without changing their house around, the yard, etc) but I am not stuck in the past. Half the time it never comes to my mind. The past flows beyond me. A day can seem a week ago, and three years ago can seem like yesterday. I gaped when a friend showed me a picture recently with 2014 stamped on the bottom. That was that long ago!? My grasp on time sucks. My awareness of time sucks. My own carelessness with time… sucks. A Si-friend recently said, “You should take more pictures with your cat. You will want them when she’s eventually gone.”

I stared at her. “I will?”

See, I don’t think like that. When people, places, things, are gone, I miss them. I love them. I still think about them sometimes, but they are gone. I do not pour over pictures. I do not sit and endlessly talk about the past. I do not want to think about the past. I moved on.

Sometimes, people tell me I should slow down, or take more time with that, since they do not want me to “look back one day, and regret this moment.”

Thing is, that probably won’t happen. I rarely go back.

Unless I hurt someone badly, and never received their forgiveness, or am beating myself up about something I should have done to stop something bad from happening, I don’t look back and regret. You cannot drive a car staring into your rear view mirror. In that way, I am careless. But I don’t know how to NOT be careless. Things matter right now, and then they’re gone. I loved that show, but it’s canceled. There’s new stuff to watch. I take in so much of it (as a Ne-dom), only a few things stick longer than six months.

And sometimes, I desperately want them to stick. I sit with someone or something loving it, immersed in its beauty, and think, “How can I hold onto it? I already feel it slipping away! WHY CAN’T I APPRECIATE THIS MORE?”

Inferior Si.

This is going to sound weird, because it is weird. But, under stress… I start obsessively tinkering with sensory elements. I’ve been editing and rewriting a book for what seems like forever (forever to me is four months, but I don’t want to talk about how this is the eighth draft of the fourth version of this book in two years) which is very tedious, Si-driven work. My Te is happy to help out with deadlines, and charts, and word counts, and I have a nice little sheet of paper with things marked on it, where I enter my progress each day to keep myself motivated. But I swear on my soul, yesterday when I opened the file, my Si went nuts and said: I don’t like this font. It curls funny. Change it.

So I did.

And then I sat there for at least ten minutes, changing the font, again and again, then the sizing several times. I printed out a page to see how it will look in book form, then promptly forgot which configuration I used (poor Si!) and had to print several more sheets in different sizes. I never did figure out which was the font and what size I used for that first sheet. (Shame, I like it the best.) Then I resized the file across my screen, to try and get the font to ‘curl’ how I like it, so I could read it. I cannot read it, unless it’s the right size. And font. And I must edit so there are no paragraphs that end with one word on the next line.

(Are you laughing yet? Is that not pathetic? Welcome to my life.)

Screw inferior Si. It’s bullshit.

I never know how to say this without hurting feelings but… Fi-doms are sensitive and since INFPs have higher Si, they do not forgive you fast.

Think about two terrific insults against NFPs (from future husbands) in literature and compare them to how you process things.

Gilbert Blythe pulls Anne Shirley’s braid and calls her carrots. The little INFP smashes her slate against his head and screams at him in class. She then tells Diana “the iron has entered my soul: I shall never forgive him,” and proceeds to ignore him, compete with him, and refuse to speak to him. For years. Gibert has to grovel to get on her good side, many times. She is super sensitive and her emotions flare up immediately. “You hurt me EXCRUCIATINGLY,” she says. She means it. He DID.

Mr. Darcy insults Lizzie’s appearance (she is not handsome enough to tempt me into a dance – ie, she’s not that pretty) in Pride & Prejudice. ENFP Lizzie gapes at him, then promptly turns it into a joke. She never brings it up again. She’s mad, but more mad about what he does to Jane than his insult. She finally confronts him when he proposes, but not about that. No, it was not the insult that hit her; it was the impression she formed of his character, based on it. And when he writes her a letter that basically calls out her family for being loud, obnoxious, inappropriate trash, she is pissed but has enough high Te to realize: he has every right to feel that way about us, based on what he saw. Once she realizes WHY he thinks how he does, her anger cools. And her mind changes about him. The anger dissipates.

Did he hurt her? Sure. Deeply? Not so much.

Someone walked up to my INFP the other day and insulted her appearance. It hurt. A lot. She will probably never speak to him again.

A person insulted me to my face at dinner a few years ago. He basically implied the people I work with and the caliber of their work is poor, and I should do a better job selecting the material we work on together. (IE: Wow, you suck.) I bitch-slapped him good with a Te-snarl comeback and … promptly moved on. I was mildly annoyed by it, and it certainly colored our interactions from that point on, but I wasn’t hurt by it so much as annoyed. We stayed “friends.”

I can count the number of times people have actually hurt my feelings on one hand. My Te is strong.

How do I know this?

I’m one of the first people to come up with a rational, non-emotional “fix it” to problems. I often discount my own feelings or put them aside entirely, to get a job done. I remember one time, a friend PM’d me after I wrote a movie review and said, “But did you LIKE it?? You wrote an excellent review, but it was so non-emotional I don’t even know what YOU thought of it.” I criticized the poor elements and talked about the good ones, but there was none of “me” there.

I admit, I was a little more emotionally reactive as a child / young teeanger, but Fi still wasn’t running the show. Most Fi-dom children are very sensitive. When asked what I was like, various family members (without consulting one another) have laughed and said, “Your focus was on being a comedian. You wanted to make people laugh. But you were not especially emotional.”

I’m not. It’s true. Sometimes to my own determent.

- ENFP Mod

PS: If you get to the end of this certain you are an NFP, but you don’t know what you do in a situation in order to compare it to Lizzie or Anne’s emotional reactions, congrats: that’s shitastic inferior Si. You are an indecisive Ne-dom.

[pandabearlikes]

Temporary Affairs II

 Table of Contents 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13

Disclaimer: There may be a part in this chapter not suitable for younger viewers.  If you do not wish to read it kindly skip the section highlighted with the "※               ※                 ※" borders.  It’s more for comedic purposes than ahem, but let’s play safe ;).

  Chapter 13.  Happiness 

  A month flashed by in the blink of an eye.  Yoona turned from a pink wrinkly creature to a chubby happy little baby.  You soon realized that you had been scaring yourself with the whole “unfit to be a mother role” talk because you were practically an expert; it was so much easier than you had imagined because you were enjoying every moment of it.  Plus, Yoona was such a good girl.  She rarely threw tantrums without a reason.  In addition to all of that, your mother-in-law had bonded with the little princess.  There wasn’t a moment where they weren’t together. 

  “Aigoo!  Yoon-ie is such a beautiful girl, isn’t she?” your mother-in-law bounced the little bundle up and down on her lap. 

  You passed her a bib to wipe off the drool that escaped from the corner of Yoona’s lips.

  “She has such big round eyes just like her mother’s,” she complimented.

  A flush of pink covered your cheeks.  Yoona extended out her tiny arms as if asking to be held.  Your mother-in-law happily complied, bringing her into her chest. 

  “She’s spoiled rotten!” you exclaimed, giggling when the baby’s lips curled up into a sneaky smile. 

  The jingling of keys sounded from the front door.  You turned around to see Jongin and Sehun enter, chatting gleefully with one another.  In Sehun’s arms was Youngwoo in a mini suit and tie. 

  “Aww, my little Youngwoo-yah!” you jumped from your seat to greet the little prince. 

  Sehun gladly passed the baby boy into your arms.  You nuzzled into Youngwoo’s tummy and he giggled at your touch.  Holding him, you stalked back to the sofa to reunite with your mother-in-law and Yoona. 

  The little boy looked at Yoona intrigued to see another baby in the same room. 

  “Young-ie, this is Yoona!” you introduced in a baby’s voice, “Do you think she’s pretty?” 

  Youngwoo babbled happily in affirmation while Yoona scared innocently back at him. 

  “Oy, Jagiya, are you trying to play matchmaker?” Jongin asked. 

  “And what if I am?” you inquired, wiggling your brows. 

  “You’re really going to betroth our precious little princess off already?” he half-whined.

  “And what if I am?” you repeated.

  Jongin looked at Sehun for backup but Sehun simply replied, “I don’t mind”. 

  Your husband threw his head back defeated. 

  -----

  On a Sunday afternoon, a few weeks later, Jongin, you, and Yoona took time off to visit your parent’s place because they had been nagging to see the baby.  Eagerly, you pounced into the back seat, kicking your legs gleefully for you hadn’t been back to your old house in over a year.  Shaking his head in amusement, your husband carefully opened the back door and buckled Yoona into the baby carrier.  She flailed around, whimpering and crying at the unfamiliar atmosphere. 

  “Aigoo, my little princess.  It’s okay, Omma is here,” you immediately bent over to kiss her and rubbed her little tummy in a soothing manner. 

  After another round of kisses, coos, and peek-a-boos, the baby’s mood picked up.  Jongin and you sighed in relief. 

  “So are my queen and my princess ready to set off?” your husband asked in the driver seat while adjusting the rearview mirror. 

  “Yes Sir!” you saluted and he drove off. 

  On the way there, you and Yoona invented a new game called “Bye Bye Pacifier”.  Yes, you could have thought of a more creative title but it was really on the spot.  At the red light, Jongin turned around to peep at you two’s silliness and laughed.  Basically, Yoona would spit out her pacifier; you would go “oopsie” in a baby voice, pick it up then stick it back into her mouth.  She’d make this adorable noise between a giggle and babble and playfully spit it back out, thrashing her tiny arms around to motion for you to pick it back up for her.  By the time you were at your destination, you guys were at round twenty-five of “Bye Bye Pacifier”. 

  “Jagiya, we’re here,” Jongin announced after realizing that you were so focused in your playtime with your daughter, you didn’t even notice.

  “Oh,” you responded then turned to the baby, “Yoon-ie, you wanna see grandma and grandpa?” 

  She sucked on her pacifier, making a “toot toot” noise.  Awww.  I’m gonna meltttt.  Jongin got out of the car and opened the door for you.  You unstrapped Yoona and gently lifted her up onto your chest. 

  “Omma!  Appa!  I’m home!” you greeted as soon as the maid opened the door to the place you spent your childhood at.  You almost cried tears of joy. 

  “Aigoo!!!  My precious baby!” you mother rushed toward you.

  You extended one arm out, anticipating a hug but your mother U-turned and took Yoona out from your arms. 

  -____________-.  You pouted.  Beside you, your husband stifled back a mocking laughter and instead patted your shoulder. 

  Crossing your arm, you followed your mother into the living room area. 

  “Now that Omma has Yoona, she forgot about ________,” you pretended to be upset, but really you were so overjoyed that Yoona was so loved in the family. 

  “________ah, you’re not jealous of your own daughter, right?” your mother asked, not taking her attention off the cute baby in her lap.      

  “What if I am?  Even Oppa neglects me for Yoona,” you jokingly complained. 

  Next to you, your husband immediately retorted, “I do not!” 

  You turned to him and threw him to a goofy grin to make sure he knew you weren’t being serious.

  “Well, even if he did.  I wouldn’t blame him, Yoona is the most adorable little baby ever.  Huh?  Isn’t Halmoni right, Yoonie?” the older woman said, nuzzling her nose against your daughter’s tummy.  She squirmed around spitting out her pacifier.

  “Oopsie,” you automatically replied, squatting down to pick it up, disinfect it, and stick it back into Yoona’s mouth. 

  “Abonim, do you want to hold Yoona?” you heard your husband ask your father who had been silently watching. 

  “Yeah, Appa, do you want to play with her?” you asked, picking up the baby to give to your father but he grunted and shook his head. 

  So you hang your head in disappointment and held Yoona up to your face to kiss her chubby cheeks in case she was also hurt by the rejection.  But really, it was your way of comforting another in hopes of distracting yourself from the blow.  Upset, you turned around and sat back down beside your mother.  Just as you do, your husband stood up, walked over, took Yoona from your arms, and placed her onto your father’s lap.  The middle-aged man, looked up at his son-in-law stunned but then softened when Yoona cooed and bounced up and down joyfully in his hold.  A rare smile crept on his face and tears brimmed in your eyes.  Jongin sat down next to you with an arm around your shoulder. 

  You leaned your head into his chest and whispered, “Thank you”.  Squeezing your hand, he shook his head to defer the credit so you rewarded him a gentle peck on the cheek. 

  “_______ah, I have something to give Yoona, come upstairs with me,” your mother spoke. 

  “Oh no, Omma.  She’s already super spoiled,” you informed but your mother was stubborn.  So you nodded and followed her up, curious as to what the present was. 

  Midway down the second floor hall, you started to feel a bit homesick.  After all, this place was where you spent the first twenty-two years of your life.  It was where you took your first step, rode your first bicycle, cried when you failed your chemistry exam…etc.  Unknowingly, you stopped in front of your princess room and peeped in.  Everything was still the same –  the pastel pink walls, lace curtains, and princess chair.  You giggled recalling the time Jongin barged in to check on you after you had forgotten to give him a call after you got home.  We will meet again someday, thank you for being my escape for these twenty-two years.  I have found my home with Oppa and Yoona now.  With a contented sigh, you closed the door.

  As your mother dug through her drawers searching for the mysterious gift for your daughter, you waited outside to not pressure her.  That’s when your eye discovered that your father’s office door wasn’t locked.  Growing up, it was like some forbidden area that no one – not even your mother was allowed in.  Curiosity killed the cat.  Tiptoeing, you took a peep through the slit.  That’s when you saw it.  Instantly, a tear rolled down your face.  You opened the door and without your consent, your legs guided you forward to the image that captivated your attention earlier.  In the center of the room was a painting, oh so nobly framed in this gorgeous glass and crystal border.  But it wasn’t just any painting – it was “The Puppet”, your first ever work of art that got officially displayed at an art gallery.  Your husband had informed you that immediately following its exhibition, an anonymous buyer had purchased it for a large sum of money.  Never in a million years would you have guessed it was your one and only father.

  Your lips quivered and your face was immediately swamped in tears.  Lifting your hand, your fingers grazed along the painting.  Under it was a label that read, “My Precious Daughter, ________’s Masterpiece”. 

  “Appa…” your voice cracked and your shoulders shook. 

  Your attention turned to the other walls of his office, that were lined with other drawings and pictures, a few of them dating to when you were just the tender age of three.  It was a sloppy crayon drawing you did for a preschool assignment called, “My Family”.  Walking over to another wall, you sobbed seeing a ripped up painting that was taped carefully back together and framed in a delicate diamond border.  It was the watercolor landscape you drew and submitted to an Art Academy secretly, behind your father’s back, when you were applying for colleges.  When he found out, he had angrily torn it up and threatened to disown you if you dared diverge from the path of business he had intended you to walk.  But why was it here?  You wiped your tears to squint at the letters underneath.  “A Father’s Heartbreaking Decision,” it read.  You burst into tears. 

  “Waaaa waaa waaaa,” a baby’s cry caught your attention. 

  Gasping, you turned around to see Jongin with Yoona in his arms.  Next to him was your father.  Upon realizing you noticed him, he instantaneously turned to leave. 

  “Abonim!” Jongin called.

  “Appa!” you called too, racing out of the room to chase him. 

  He stopped in his tracks with his back facing you. 

  “Appa…” you called out again, slowly walking toward him. 

  From his shaking shoulders, you could tell he was crying.  So to give him face, you stopped a foot away from him and didn’t force him to turn around. 

  “…I really…really didn’t know you kept all my artwork…” you began tearfully.

  Swallowing, he cleared his throat and said with a cracked voice, “I didn’t want you to find out”.

  “But why?  I don’t understand Appa…I thought you said my art was worthless…” you sobbed. 

  “Appa…Appa was selfish,” he admitted, “To insure that my company would survive generation after generation…I sacrificed my one and only daughter’s happiness…not only her marriage but also her passion and talent”. 

  By then, you were already bawling a river.  Beside you, Jongin squeezed you shoulder.  You looked up at him with watery eyes.  He gave you a reassuring nod and a gentle push for you to walk forward.  So you did.  With quivering lips, you placed your hand on your father’s arm.  His body stiffened.  Slowly, you wrapped your arms around him. 

  “Thank you, Appa,” you sobbed. 

  For the first time he turned to you and you finally saw the extent of his break down.  His eyes were bloodshot red and her facial features sagged. 

  “No…you shouldn’t—“ he spoke.

  “No, I should.  Growing up, I was under the illusion that you thought my art was not good enough.  But now I know.  Thank you.  And because of you, I have found my eternal happiness with Jongin-oppa and Yoona,” you responded, tightening you hug around him. 

  He was silent for the next few minutes but gradually, he brought his hand up and patted your shoulder.  It wasn’t a lot but it was enough to show you that he cared and his actions against you growing up were all out of love.  With one last squeeze, you removed yourself from him.  Turning around, you realized that not only was Jongin and your daughter witnessing the father-daughter interaction, your mother had seen it all play out as well.  She wiped the tears that brimmed in her eyes and walked up to your with a velvet box in her hand. 

  “Here it is.  Your father picked it out,” she informed.

  “No, I didn’t,” you father immediately countered, fidgeting nervously. 

  “Yes, he did,” your mother corrected. 

  You sighed in anticipation and took the box from her hands.  Inside was a pair of golden anklets with bells.  You squinted your eyes and picked up the one that looked visibly worn out.  Inside was a deep engraving of your name. 

  “_______ah, do you remember that?  It was yours when you were a baby. Your father kept it to this day.  After you gave birth, he searched everywhere for a blacksmith who would make a replica for your daughter”, your mother informed.

  Holding back tears, you held the other anklet up to your eyes to see “Kim Yoona” engraved into the inside.  You held it up to your chest, sobbing. 

  Jongin walked over with Yoona and asked, “Abonim, do you want to help Yoon-ie put it on?”

  Biting your lip, you looked from your daughter to your father.  A whimper managed to escape when the older man blinked back tears, stepped forward, and took the anklet from your hands.  His body trembled but with determination, he gently slipped it onto the baby’s foot. 

  “Waa, so pretty, right Yoon-ie?” Jongin said, bouncing her up and down.  She squirmed around causing the bells to jingle. 

  Your father sighed and turned to leave but you called after him.  Holding out the box that contained your anklet, you asked, “Appa, do you want to keep it?” 

  He looked up to stop the tears from falling.  A wide grin spread across his face and he placed his hands over yours that held the box, “I’d love to”. 

  You threw your arms around him again.              

  -----

  One day as you were taking your sweet time soaking in a bubble bath, Jongin barged in to relieve his bladder.  You gasped, covering your body shyly.  Really…why were you that shy…Your heart raced in an insane speed, roaming over his body. 

  “Sorry, Jagiya, I really need to go.  I’ll be quick,” he apologized.

  After using the toilet, he turned around to leave but you slid open the glass shower door and popped your head out.

  “Oppa…do you want to stay?” you asked bashfully.

  His hand hovered over the doorknob, seemingly debating whether to stay or to leave. 

  “Oppa…” you called out seductively. 

  In seconds, you watched him strip down, tossing his clothes randomly all throughout the restroom as if creating a trail all the way from the door to the bathtub you were in. 

  ※               ※                 ※

    You huffed and puffed.  Sweet drops trickled down your forehead, down to the crook of your neck, stopping on the valley between your breasts.  Jongin teasingly licked it off with his tongue.  You groaned and he smirked. 

  “Stop teasing me…” you whined. 

  “Okay, Babe.  Ready for another round then?” he said lustfully. 

  Your eyes rolled back in pleasure as his bare skin touched yours.  A shiver ran down your spine like electric currents.  You clawed his back when he slipped inside of you. 

  “Oppaa…” you called out, bending your back forward to get closer against his body. 

  Flexing his neck, he flirtatiously grazed his lips against yours. 

  “You’re teasing meeeee,” you whined, grasping a fistful of his hair to keep him steady so you could kiss him back. 

  A moan escaped your lips when his tongue crept into your mouth. 

  And then suddenly, a loud wail sounded through the baby walkie-talkie monitor.  You blinked, confused and hazed at first from your lovemaking to recognize what was happening.  But when you did remember, you tapped on Jongin’s shoulder to get his attention. 

  “Yoona,” you managed to say in between a kiss. 

  “Should I go get it?” Jongin asked, still hovering over you, his hips still thrusting up and down. 

  “No, I can,” you replied, though you’d honestly much rather continue what you were doing. 

  Just as you were leaning over to grab your top, Yoona’s cries ceased.  Puzzled, both Jongin and you froze in place. 

  “I got it.  You two can continue doing…uh…whatever you were doing,” your mother-in-law’s voice shouted from outside the room. 

  “Oh my God,” you mouthed to Jongin but all he did was chuckle in delight. 

  “Guess we can go a few more rounds tonight then, Babe,” he leaned in to suck on your lower lips.  You’re such a teaseee you sex god. 

  But you always fell for his trap – always.     

  ※               ※                 ※

      On a Sunny afternoon, two months later, Jongin and you were sitting on the bed flipping through tourist magazines.  You knew you wanted to go somewhere romantic for your make up Honey Moon.

  “How about San Franciso?” Jongin suggested but you shook your head.

  “Nah, that place is so foggy!” you commented.

  Smirking, he draped an arm around your waist and seductively whispered, “You know what we can do in all that fog?”  Omg.  Oh no you didn’t, bad boy. 

  You felt the temperature rise up from your toes to the top of your head.  Taking the magazine into both your hands, you fanned it to lower your body temperature.  But Jongin, held onto your wrist to stop you. 

  “You know, I can easily help you with that instead,” he slurred.

  You bent your head back when he nibbled your ear.  Kim Jongin, you life ruiner!!!  And somehow within seconds, he was already on top of you, licking your lips to tempt you to fall into his trap again.  And you willingly fell.  But a sudden knot in the pit of your stomach caused you to push him away.  Covering your mouth, you dashed into the bathroom and threw up into the toilet.  Oh crap.  Kim Jongin, you did not…

   Your husband quickly sprinted into the restroom to check on you. 

  “Are you okay?” he asked worriedly, his tone so much more serious than the one he used in bed. 

  Clutching your stomach, you continued to vomit into the toilet bowl.  Grimacing beside you, Jongin patted your back, hoping it’d make you feel better.  When you were done, you immediately flipped through the calendar looking for familiar red stars that you stuck on each month as record.  But you hadn’t marked anything this month.  With your mouth agape, you turned around to look at your hubby. 

  “What?” he asked confused at your expression. 

  “Kim Jongin…you did not…” you gritted your teeth. 

  “I did not what?” he asked, furrowing his eyebrows. 

  Shaking your head, you dug in the cabinets for a pregnancy test.  You never thought you’d be putting those to use so quickly.  Jongin’s eyes widened.

  “Jagiya…you’re not…” he began and you sent him a death glare. 

              So for the next ten minutes, the two of you waited quietly in the bathroom.  At first you were so angry and miserable that there was a possibility of #2 coming so fast after you had just gotten through the first pregnancy.  Well, and the fact that your husband had promised you a Honey Moon to make up for the one you guys missed because you got pregnant and had to cancel the first one.  But as the clock ticked, your frown gradually flipped upside down.  There were so many people in this world dying to have children but couldn’t and if God trusted you enough to gift you another little angel, then you’d be more than happy. 

  You looked up to glance at Jongin and realized he’d been silently observing you.  His face was filled with remorse and guilt. 

  Laughing, you asked, “What’s with the sad face?”

  “I’m not going to forgive myself if I got you pregnant so fast again,” he grunted. 

  With a contented sigh, you got up from the toilet seat and walked over to sit on the edge of the bathtub, next to Jongin. 

  “You know…Oppa…maybe it’s not such a bad idea.  At this rate, I’ll be done giving birth to our six children by the age of thirty!” you chirped, hugging his arm. 

  “But I promised you I’d take you on your vacation,” he sighed. 

  “Yeah, Kim Jongin you better not forget that.  I better get to go on a world tour after #2,” you joked. 

  Your husband’s spirits lifted seeing that you weren’t upset anymore.  The timer buzzed on your phone to notify you that the results were out.  Jongin and you exchanged looks of anticipation.  Closing your eyes, you said a little prayer. 

  Two lines.  A wide grin spread across your face. 

  “Yay, our Baby Rockstar is on board!” you exclaimed happily. 

  Next to you, Jongin sighed again and leaned in to kiss you on your cheek.

  “I’m sorry, Jagiya,” he apologized. 

  Frowning, you turned around and gave him a stern look, “I’m not angry at all…but if you continue to have that depressed look on your face then I will be.  I will come to the conclusion that you don’t want me or the baby”.

  “No!  No, that’s not what I meant at all,” he said defensively. 

  Smiling, you took both of his hands into yours and said, “Then let’s go celebrate!!”

  Jongin chuckled, thankful for your optimism.  You dragged him downstairs to share the good news with your mother-in-law, who you knew would be thrilled to learn that she was about to have another grandchild to play with. 

  Midway, your husband stopped you.  With a sigh, he gazed into your eyes.  You looked back into his.  Effortlessly, he tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear and subsequentially leaned in to give you a tender, loving kiss.  You kissed him back with just as much love. 

  “Jagiya, I really love you,” he confessed, “Like really, really”.

  “And I really, really, really love you too,” you replied, tiptoeing to give him another kiss. 

  When you two separated, he nuzzled his nose against yours. 

  “…But…I’m ready to add another ring to my collection,” you joked, pointing at the two that sat on your ring finger.  Hehe. 

  “Your wish is my command,” he slurred before closing the distance between your lips again. 

  You giggled into the kiss, feeling oh so, so blessed to have gone through the whirlwind of events to lead up to this point time where if someone asked you to describe in one word, you would simply reply with, “Happiness”.          

              a/n: ~CRIES A RIVER~ THANK YOU ALL MY LITTLE UNICORNS AND BUNNIES <3 >3< It has been an amazing journey with you guys through Temporary Affairs!!! o(╥﹏╥)o

  Jongin & his super sperms though haha.  & Youngna/ Yoonwoo ship sailing already when they’re only babies gahhhh legit love at first sight!!!  (▰˘◡˘▰)

  NOW WHO’S READY FOR BEAUTIFUL DISTRACTION?!  WHERE ARE MY TAO BIASES?!?!  RAISE YOUR HANDS!!  SHOOT ME A MESSAGE!!!! 

  Also, a reminder to please, please vote for EXO in MAMA Awards.  Click here for post I talk about it: VOTE VOTE VOTE.   

 ????

[theelderswear]

Star Trek Discourse

So, @saltylittleslytherin has deemed it fit to come at me about my love of Star Trek over Star Wars. I’ve decided to show just how exactly Star Trek is under-appreciated and deserves a lot more love and attention.

Star Trek: The Original Series was the first series in the Star Trek Universe(hence it’s name). It featured two POC as the main cast, one of which is gay. Star Trek: TOS was released in 1966. It was extremely progressive for its time. Not only that, but it featured the first televised interracial kiss(between Uhura and Kirk). Aside from its awesomeness in the cast, the Original Series consulted various scientists for aid in accurately depicting space, ie whenever they were in a nebula. This is only that tip of the ice burg for this series, I could delve in a lot deeper(for example, inspiring an entire generation of children to become scientists).

Star Trek: The Next Generation was a total mindfuck, as the main character was a balding British man with a sour attitude, something that was completely un-precedented in a time of handsome men being the only possible leads. Sir Patrick Stewart was a perfect Captain Picard. Beside him, however, were three other POC cast members. Marina Sirtis, playing Deanna Troi, LeVar Burton, playing Geordie La Forge, and Michael Dorn, playing Worf. All three of these characters where very important(and loved) in TNG, and straight up, this show started in 1987. But aside from(once again) having POC as the main cast(looking at you, Star Wars), it also featured some male crewmembers wearing skirts rather then slacks as their uniforms. An excerpt from the Memory-Alpha: According to the book The Art of Star Trek, "the skirt design for men 'skant' was a logical development, given the total equality of the sexes presumed to exist in the 24th century." As well, Geordie LaForge was also a male POC with a disability that he refused to have treated(he is questioned early in the series about why he wouldn’t receive new eyes and he makes it clear that that is not what he wants).

This was in the 80′s!!! Not only that, but they had a race of aliens that had evolved past gender. A literal line: “We find gender to be... primitive.” AN ACTUAL THING!!! THAT HAPPENED!!! IN STAR TREK!!! So, the discourse for that series done, moving on.

Star Trek: Voyager featured a female character at the head of the ship as the shows lead. First point. Second point, yet again, two POC as main cast. The Vulcan Tuvok, and the First Officer Chakotey. I’m gonna stick with Chakotey here for a bit... He was the first Native American main character on Star Trek. Tbh, I have nothing more to say for this series... yeah. Moving on.

DON’T GET ME STARTED. ON THE STAR TREK MOVIES... ... ... TOO LATE. K, so, I’m just gonna jump straight onto Star Trek: Beyond and making Sulu gay thing. Obviously, it was an intentional move to have him be gay(reach out to the community, make it more relatable), however, upon watching the movie, I’ve found that the scene wasn’t even about Sulu being gay. It was about him having a kid. Obviously, him being gay was their “leap forward”, but the scene was more about Spock obviously wanting a family. It starts off with Kirk saying that the crew misses their families, and it pans to a shot of a picture of Sulu’s daughter. Not his husband, his daughter. Later on, after(or before, can’t remember) Spock has that final separation with Uhura, he looks at Sulu greeting his family, and the camera is centred around the daughter. If you really pay attention, Sulu being gay wasn’t the main focus of that scene. Moving on, Simon Pegg, who wrote part of script, actually reached out to the community at Memory-Alpha(the wikia) to have them help him design the necklace that Spock has given Uhura. He made sure to include devoted fans to help him create this masterpiece of a movie. Later on, when he received backlash for his choice with Sulu, he posted this on his website: Firstly, why Sulu? It’s a good point, I mean it could have been anybody: Kirk is a pansexual fun seeker; who knows why Bones got divorced? Nobody said Spock and Uhura were exclusive; Chekov is just permanently horny and let’s face it, there’s more to Scotty and Keenser than meets the eye. 

Kirk is pan. Just. Kirk. Is pan. Also, the rest of the stuff. He straight up said, though, Kirk is pan. In a time where people barely acknowledge men as being bi in mainstream pop culture, he said pan. I just. This man. Moving past lgbtqia+ stuff, I’m going to talk about the elephant in the room. The fucking Oscars. And how Star Trek lost. Which, tbh, was finally something people payed attention to. The people who made the prosthetics for the aliens in Star Trek: Beyond made sure that they were comfortable to stay in for long periods of time, were moveable, and required little to no cgi to make. In fact, Jaylah had I believe none, besides the regular stuff they use to make films all fancy.

In short, I fucking love Star Trek and will fight you till the end of time. Allison out.

[sosmomlife]

Hudson’s Journey

Hey all!!! It’s Andrea here.  I’m sure many of you are trying to figure out how to navigate this crazy change in our world.  Some of you have children at home and are trying to juggle “home schooling” amongst other things, like your own work, a new baby, a partner who has been laid off, etc.  This week our school board officially rolled out distance learning so this meant my husband Andy and I were going to implement more structure to the day.  I’m a teacher and he is off of work right now so this should be easy, right? 100% WRONG!!!!  Here’s a little story of our oldest who has been through a lot and battles with his emotions and abilities every day of his life. 

That cutie (ya ya I may be biased) in the picture above is Hudson. He will be 8 in June. Just before he turned 4 I took him to watch a baseball game and as we were walking beside 3rd base (outside of the diamond) a ball came hurdling across the field, hit the top of the fence and smacked Hudson right in the head. He dropped so fast and I was terrified. I will never forget the "clunk" sound; like a coconut cracking open. I was terrified but he was conscious and settled down after about 10 minutes. He was very clingy so we called EMS just to check him over and make sure he was ok. They came, did a quick assessment and left it up to me to decide if I wanted him to go to the hospital.  By that point he was acting himself so I figured I would just monitor him and if anything got worse I would take him to the ER. I did question why he didn't have a goose egg  (I always heard that no goose egg could be a bad sign, but the EMS responded with "ya that's weird." They pretty much made me feel like I wasted their time so off I sent them not wanting to be “that crazy mom.” As the day progressed Hudson went from playing hard outside to wanting to lie down every couple of hours. I thought it was the heat or that he didn't sleep great the night before.  That night I had him sleep with me and he was very restless. He kept waking up and saying that his head hurt a lot where he got hit but then he would go back to sleep.  The next morning he seemed pretty good other than not wanting breakfast (which isn't normal) because his tummy hurt  (which is normal for my dairy sensitive boy). He went to his first t-ball game (I know I know...what were we thinking taking him to play baseball) in the morning but came home and crashed hard on the couch. He was off and on all day and we questioned taking him to the ER but then he would get up and play like he was totally ok.  At 6 pm after noticing his entire left side of his head was swollen I decided to call Telehealth to get their opinion and they said to take him to the ER immediately.  They always say that so I still wasn't too worried. Hudson slept the whole car ride to Stratford General and when we arrived he was happy and hyper. The waiting room was so busy that I contemplated leaving. Hudson was putting on a show for all the other "patients" Re-enacting how he got hit in the head by the ball.  I definitely thought we would be sent home because he seemed totally fine.

We got called into a room before a lot of people who arrived before us. We didn't wait long before the doctor came in to do an assessment.  Right away the doctor felt the swelling and said it's a boggy hematoma meaning he has a break in his skull. I was shocked and terrified but the doctor assured me that most of the time its small and no big deal. It will heal on its own she said. She sent him for a CT scan and I was told I could be in the room to watch the images of his little skull and brain..or as Hudson says his "big" brain.  The first images started coming up and all of a sudden I was asked if I wanted water and taken out of the room. I instantly knew something was wrong but tried to wait calmly for Hudson to come out.  They had previously told me it would be about an hour before the radiologist looked over the scans but within 5 minutes the doctor came to see us.  The scans showed a significant break in his skull and a small bleed on the outside of his skull. I started imagining the worst and stupid scenes from Grey’s Anatomy started rushing through my head. I was so scared and upset but I knew I had to calm down so I could call Andy and give him the news.  The neuro team in London was going over the scans and transportation was being arranged to take us to Victoria University Hospital in London. Hudson in all of this was still happy and entertaining anyone who came to see him.  Before we left I was assured that Hudson would be fine  because we made it past the crucial first 24 hours. We spent 48 hrs in London for observation and had the greatest healthcare team supporting us throughout the entire ordeal. The next month we were on high alert and Hudson had a couple of seizures (which is common after a concussion). We spent the next year going for check ups every few months with the Neurologist in London. Everything went great so Hudson was released at the one year mark. We thought we were in the clear, but don't let that fool you, the paranoia of our kids getting hit in the head or falling and hitting their head is extremely high to this day. Ugh!

Fast forward to a year and a half ago when Hudson started grade 1. Since the "accident" Hudson's behaviour had definitely changed, he could barely remember anything that happened the day before, let alone a week before. He was super fidgety, always touching his face and wiggling around on chairs. We would ask him to do 3 things and he would forget everything we asked him after he walked away. We were often annoyed and frustrated and we were struggling with managing his "lazy-like" behaviour. I knew there was something else up but people kept assuring me he was acting like a “typical” boy.

After a couple of months in class I had a meeting with Hudson's teacher to discuss his progress and behaviour. I mentioned the head injury he had sustained and the thought of possible ADHD and she thought it might be a good idea to have him psychologically assessed. We went through the lengthy process of a psychological educational assessment and received a thorough analysis of him. Everything the psychologist explained made so much sense: low executive functioning skills, low average working memory, low average processing speed, extremely low visual perception and fine motor coordination, broadly average academic skills, high average oral skills and finally anxiety due to the need he feels to please everybody. It was a huge eye opener for Andy, but wasn't as surprising to me, being in the educational world has exposed me to a number of students with these exceptionalities. It did however make me feel like an ass for thinking my child was not listening and being a lazy jerk whenever I asked him to do a list of things (ie. get ready for school).

Since Hudson was 6 at the time of the assessment the psychologist would only provide a provisional diagnosis of ADHD as his brain is still developing as well as due to the uncertainty of the impact he might have from the brain injury. We spoke to a neurological psychologist about doing a neurological assessment but he said at Hudson's age the results and recommendations would be the same as his previous assessment so to just wait until his next assessment at 10 when he can better communicate his thoughts and feelings.

With the current assessment report we received we were able to get an Individualized Education Plan (IEP) created for Hudson at his school. This IEP will stay with him throughout his educational journey as it is needed. The staff at Hudson's school have been so amazingly supportive. They have been following his psych ed assessment recommendations which includes things like, more breaks, strategic seating (close proximity to teacher and good choice of friends), more time to complete work, chunking of work, more oral testing and no repetitive tasks if he already shows he can do something.

I wish I could say that knowing his limitations has made us better at parenting him but in all honesty it hasn't. Sure we check ourselves more but the frustration and annoyance is still there. Some days more than others. I have actually just put a reminder in my phone for the start of each month to re-read Hudsons psych ed assessment and Occupational Therapist report. Just reading it again to write this blog post reminded me of so many things I had forgotten and was treating Hudson unfairly with: "you just have to do 20 min of work...why can't you just do 20 min and then be done....if you spent all the time that you have been sulking typing you would be done by now...." and so on and so on. Sigh. It's a learning process for all of us and I just need to keep telling myself the way I tell him that practicing what is hard is the only way it will get easier. So I will practice my patience as I help him practice working through his challenges and in between we'll go play some sports because we're friggin’ awesome at that.

~Andrea

[thebibliomancer]

50 More Days of Comics! 39/50: Low #6 (2015)

This comic book I’ve never heard of has a woman with a big sci-fi gun riding a lion.

That’s making a lot of promises re: quality that it best keep. I expect premium woman riding a lion content and I’m not afraid to whine if I don’t get it.

I’m a broken record on this point but hey. Recap pages. Or a short thing introducing the premise. Say what you like about Marvel but the little scroll above the title on the intro splash page tended to get this very right.

But the internet exists so now I can look up a series synopsis while also still complaining that the comic didn’t do the work for me.

So, apparently BILLIONS OF YEARS IN THE FUTURE THE SURFACE OF EARTH IS UNINHABITABLE BECAUSE THE SUN HAS STARTED TO EXPAND INTO A RED GIANT

And the underwater city of Salus and its helmsmen the Caine family search for life-supporting planets with robotic probes.

Per Rick Remender, comic writer, its a story about “one woman’s optimism in the face of inevitable and true doom.”

One Woman is going to have her work cut out for her because where this issue begins, son Marik Caine has been thrown into the blood sports arena to be killed by a monster, husband Johl Caine is super dead, and Stel Caine (aka One Woman) and her daughter Tajo Caine have been taken prisoner by Pirate Emperor Rohl and forced to wear slave bikinis as they watch Marik (but not that Marik, alas) be thrown to the monster mammoth

Things also turn around pretty quickly though. Through the power of flashback, Marik remembers that there’s a type of shell that shine in accordance with the truth of one’s heart so he whips it out and stuns the monster with the flash. Because it’s eyes are adapted to darkness.

And then a mermaid, that I assume he knows, grabs him and pulls him to safety.

And THEN Marik rallies the people into rebellion with a rousing speech. I don’t know who this Marik guy is but he’s coming off awfully protagonisty.

Marik: “Polumans! Have you had enough of this farce? Have you had enough of this dictator, sitting in his tower, keeping you uneducated, desperate, and malnourished?! This coward, he who keeps you distracted with fixed blood sports -- designed to take what little wealth you hold?

Have you had enough of this mighty pirate warrior who sent a sulking assassin to stab me in the back?!

I THINK YOU HAVE!

We have all inherited a giant bag of shit. The sun expands -- the oceans grow toxic -- and we hide within the last remaining domes, waiting out the clock.

We sate our fears with sex, drink and violence -- distractions from the truths we dare not face. Truths we accept because people like Lord Roln tell us there is no hope. No solution. Yet, still, we dream of more for our lives --

We are not spies from Salus, as Roln would have you believe. We were on a mission to find a new world -- a green world with fresh air, clean water, and a living sun! But instead of aiding us in lifting our people from these depths your emperor has toyed with us for his amusement!

Aid us and we will ascend together! RISE AGAINST THIS TYRANT!”

Not bad for a person bad at card games.

So there is a lion but its Roln’s pet. And wow. World is ending and the sun is expanding and we still have lions around. Good job, humanity.

But the lion mostly just serves to keep Marik’s friends and mermaid friend busy so Marik can mano-a-mano with Roln.

Marik yells that all he had in this world was his family but Roln took that from him but Roln claims “Yer father gave it over with no noise. Handed me his helmsuit and two bright daughters, on his knees -- in front of yer poor mother!”

Speaking of the poor mother, she gets tired of being Princess Leia’d so decides to Princess Leia.

She misdirects a pot shot one of Roln’s peeps was taking at Marik, uses the shot to break her chains, steals the gun, and then starts to beat up everything.

Unfortunately, some of the rioting Polumans climb aboard Roln’s viewing box and menacing sister Tajo. And she’s still chained up and not using a big gun to kick a lot of ass. So Marik throws his one weapon to impale the person menacing Tajo.

And then gets impaled himself by Roln.

But Roln is too much of a dick to just leave it at that.

Roln: “Hope is just the body releasing a chemical to keep it moving forward. A trick the mind plays on itself. No matter how cruel it is to the doomed bastard -- survival is job one.

Even now -- life seeping out of him -- Something in Marik’s DNA refuses to acknowledge the end is here. Refuses to stop fighting.

And seeing that divine prerogative shattered -- watching the hope drain from the eye -- gives me the very most pleasure.”

And then he rips out Marik’s eye. Eyelid and all, somehow.

On an unrelated note, Roln looks like what if Ming the Merciless was red-headed.

And distracted, Stel’s rampage gets halted and she gets captured.

Roln heads to somewhere, musing that with Marik’s DNA (ie the eyeball) he can pilot the helmsuit. But also this:

Roln: “Who sacked this city?”

A person: “You, Roln.”

Roln: “Who gave the refugees of the deep a home?”

Another person: “You, Roln.”

Roln: “This riot -- it really hurts my feelings!”

I’m getting a hint of MCU Grandmaster here.

Anyway, offscreen Tajo has beaten Roln to the helmsuit and put it on. And Roln begs her not to be hasty that he saved her and that she needs to help him put down this riot and save the city.

And she rips Roln in half. Pretty conclusively a ‘no.’

And then Tajo flies and rips in half Roln’s goon that’s holding her mother captive.

Tajo and Stel manage to be there with Marik as he dies, because, yes, he’s been dying this whole time.

And optimism shaken, Stel screams “THIS ISN’T HOW IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE!” to which Tajo replies “Nothing ever is.”

So the various good peeps escape and start making plans to hide in the Hollow Reef among the dead cities where scans won’t detect them. But Tajo has other plans.

Tajo: “Before Marik entered the arena, you (mom) said, ‘kill them all.’ So --”

And then there’s a two page spread of Tajo blowing up the city and killing everyone in it.

Welp.

And then Tajo decides she’s not going with her mom and the other peeps. She’s going to go looking for her sister who Roln sold into slavery. And she flies off while Stel screams for Tajo not to leave her too.

And then one final flashback just to twist the knife.

Dad Johl: “Even when what we are isn’t what we wish we were... or what others want us to be. Even when we want to turn away from it, when it becomes a burden. A compromised soul dies a million deaths in that final claustrophobic moment of realization. Always serve your own truth, Marik. Never compromise yourself.

Do what is right till that last second, even if the world collapses around you.

And if you can do that one thing, my boy... you’ll at least have made your old man proud.”

So, yeah. Optimism is hard in the face of half your family dying and becoming separated from the rest and also the sun is swelling up to swallow Earth and humanity is sinking into depravity and barbarism and everything is just awful all the time and your daughter did a war crime. On the plus side though, there are mermaids.

[kindabraveandlittlestupid]

A Love/Hate Review of the movie Black Panther and my thoughts on feelings on this MCU addition. Please note these are just my feelings and thoughts on the film, its an opinion and I am simply one guy from the internet so if there is something you agree with (great) and something you disagree with (also great) just know I am not looking to have a fight over an opinion, which lets be frank have very little influence over the real world and your own like/dislikes.

After watching the trailer and months later stepping into the movie theater, I carried with me three concerns I hopped the movie would address. The first was noting Wakanda’s isolationism in the trailer wondering why a country so advanced would allow so much chaos to go on around them which was addressed and also a main plot point in the movie carrying some good political messages with it. A+. The second was a concern for the score of the movie worried they might go the way of Blade or Daredevil letting a bunch of artists put some random songs to the movie which would feel out of place but instead they opted for the orchestra with some heavy influences from proper African music. A++. The last prejudgment was the suit being bulletproof which I could get behind with Vibranium but somehow not being affected kinetic energy (momentum) from a projectile IE AK 47 being shot at him close range. Which he would have jerked back after being shot but instead shrugged the bullets and absorbed their energy. D -. Call me a stickler but I take the Neil deGrasse Tyson approach to movies and let science influence my opinion when watching while the kinetic energy could be absorbed he is still wearing a soft flexible suit which would have had him bruised and on his ass during that first convoy attack scene.

With those three concerns addressed going into the movie, I found there were some things I loved about the movie and somethings I hated as well. I know not everyone will agree with me on this but like I said its an opinion and we all have the right to be critical of art. It's once you go from being a critic to making personal attacks against other people or the actors/crew themselves that your opinion doesn't matter anymore... looking at you Star Wars Fanboys attacking The Last Jedi.

Shuri (Love) Getting past the immediate point that I think she is beautiful, she is easily my favorite character in the movie. She injected the humor, was a proper heroine and above all else the smart girl in the movie. I don’t know why it's so important to me personally being a white guy and all but I been wanting to see a female scientist role filled by Black Woman. Perhaps it was the fact Ghostbusters 3 had that chance but dropped the ball with Leslie Jones, The Martain had a bunch of white astronauts and only one of them was Latino, Marvel itself had been lacking a smarty character who wasn't Stark or Strange, or perhaps Geostorm (god knows why I watched that movie) had a black astronaut female but I can only remember her in one scene. I know lots of people got excited for Black Panther for its dominantly African American cast (no love for Luke Cage?) but to me personally seeing Shuri as the inventor of Wakanda was the major win in the movie and I hope to see more of her in the next Infinity War and BP2. 

Heart-Shaped Herb/Vibranium (Love/Hate) I am used to many films using a MacGuffin and/or Applied Phlebotinum where something or some item seems to have a cure-all effect for the storyline that explains everything away without explaining anything. The Force, the Infinity Stones, Asgard Magic = Science, and so on most of the Marvel movies utilize something like this so I am no subtracting points completely for Black Panther doing the same but whenever I asked questions about how Black Panther never gets bruised I hear (it's because of the Herb) and no one seems too eager to break down the ‘How’ aspect behind the story. With Stark we could believe in the concept of the arc generator powering his suit and keeping shrapnel from his heart, it was explained during the movie. Black Panther, on the other hand, felt like the writers kinda mumbling “Something something something Vibranium allows them to do it” without investing to the audience's intelligence that might be able to follow along with the logic. Maybe I watched too much Star Trek and appreciate a universe that had explanations and limitations for its fantasy tech but there it is.

Killmonger (Hate) Perhaps spoiled again by good writing in other movies or years of reading comics in both the DC and Marvel Universe but Killmonger (to me) was an underdeveloped villain that quite honestly seemed kinda forced on the internet community as "the Best Marvel Villain" which I honestly feel he isn't deserving of. Here is a list of reason why I don't think he was the best.

CIA Colonizer - I realize Colonizer is supposed to be at a sting for early white exploration building colonies around Africa, Asia, India, etc but hard to feel empathy for Killmonger when served their interests so wholeheartedly. He felt justified for learning their tactics by going to Afghanistan and racking up kills of people who were not colonizers at all just Afganies. 

Dead Girlfriend - He seemed to have a relationship with one girl who was going to come back with him to Wakanda before Killmonger shot her in order to get to Klaw. I am aware this is supposed to make him look like a cold-hearted killer but its just another victim under his rampage towards the throne.

Civil War - The attempted to play up that this was his plan all along as some sort of calculated long game but the underhanded approach of trying to shame T’Challa only fractured the Wakanda people and undermind his legitimate claim to the throne. Not to mention the resulting battle ended up leaving hundreds of Wakandans dead on a battlefield when the two factions clashed.

A Stupid Fucking Plan - So his plan, in the end, was to export weapons to communities to fight ‘colonizers’ all over the world. Sounds like a solid idea but is it? It was one of those plans that were less sound the more you think about it. Was he going to deliver arms to who? Northern African Terrorists (Boko Haram) the same who kidnapped hundreds of school girls? Was he going to deliver it to inner cities in the United States where there would be massive collateral damage in black neighborhoods and where there is a real chance that some might use their weapons against each other first? If the mission was to simply sow chaos into the world then yeah its a pretty good plan to start distributing Vibranium weapons but that was not his objective, he claimed liberation which would lead to lots of bloodshed that would likely leave African Communities decimated along with most major cities.

So that's why I wasn't a big fan of Killmonger. His story was yes tragic but he adopted the means/methods of the people he hated. He seemed to have killed more of his own people or people in Afghanistan then he did any white oppressor. And lastly, his plan to dishonor T’Challa and deliver weapons around the world wasn’t a strategy of someone playing the long game but rather someone who was acting out in anger and emotion. If that is what makes him a good villain fine but I think Black Mariah tapped into that tragic backstory better.

M'Baku (Love) I suppose I liked M’Baku because he was clearly an honorable leader. Sure he challenged T’Challa for the Throne as was his right but when the others arrived to provide him the flower so he might fight Killmonger himself he instead revealed he saved T’Challa and gave the man who beat him in fair combat. He could have easily taken the flower and attempt to take the throne a second time. He could have let T’Challa float down the river to wherever but he chooses not too. Gotta show him some love for not letting temptation sway him.

W’Kabi (Hate) Not much character development invested into W’Kabi but he was presented as a friend of T’Challa and lover (maybe husband) to Okoye. I suppose what bothered me was how quickly he shifted loyalty from T’Challa to Killmonger. Not the long-standing relationship presented in the movie and also one that shouldn't have happened considering a 30-second conversation with T’Challa would reveal that Eric was working with Klaw and that the only reason WHY Klaw escaped was that Eric blew a hole in the wall. I wonder if there will be redemption for W’Kabi in the next movie or not. I certainly hope so.

Nakia (Love/Hate...Ok Love) I loved her and I hate the fact her role was so little in the movie (doesn't hurt that she to was easy on the eyes). I always appreciate someone who represents the altruistic part of society and isn't willing to sit back and watch the world burn around her. I struggle to think of any male or female character of the MCU who believes in that sort of behavior as purely as she did. Maybe Danny Rand (if he wouldn't shut up about being Iron Fist and training in K'un-Lun) had his altruistic moments by wanting to sell medication at cost but that isn't quite on the level of activity that Nakia was. Either way, I want to see more of her and see her a greater influence on T’Challa. Also, why didn’t she fly to Oakland to help Shuri setup the Wakanda Outreach centers?

Wakanda AI (Love) I know its such a small thing but think Trevor Noah is a great guy. The kind of guy we need more of in the United States to tip the scales away from the more conservative extremists. I was completely unaware he was in the movie and when I found out he was the AI for Shuri’s lab I went back to watch the movie a second time just to hear his voice. As a political nerd and just general nerd, I love little details like that laced into the film as ‘easter’ eggs and putting forward one of South Africas (and now Americas) greatest progressive comedians into the film made me happy.

Attack on Museum (Hate) I understand the whole first act was basically to help establish Killmongers character but his approach of working with Klaw for some reason seemed well... pointless. He could have any point shot Klaw threw his ass on an airplane and flown all the way down to Wakanda and challenged Black Panther for the title of King without any underhanded approach and ALL the tribes would have been loyal to him. I am sure some people think it was a way to disgrace the Black Panther but there was no way he could predict if T’Challa would kill Klaw or put him directly on one of their private jets and flown all the way back to Wakanda after the Hong Kong chase scene. Its one of those things that seemed to rely on chance to much instead of planning it out properly. I am sure someone will say he (Killmonger) tipped off the CIA so they would bring him in first but I dont buy that.

Oakland (Love) Perhaps a little bit too much of community pride is the addition of Oakland to the movie and me being a Bay Area local I am always a bit prideful when one of the local cities makes it into a show or movie. I feel San Francisco has always been our go-to city for movie magic in Nor Cal and even San Jose/Silicon Valley has become popular with the tech community dominating the region but its good to see the 510 get some love as well. Well done Marvel.

Conclusion So all and all Black Panther was pretty good. I think they should explain more the Vibranium and Heart Shaped Herb some more in next movie and apply some limitations. I think this movie has provided a great cast of strong women for young girls to look up too. An I am excited to see a part two and/or part three to the series. Even more so the conclusion of Infinity War.

If I were to put it into my top ten marvel movies...

Iron Man

Thor: Ragnarok

Avengers: Infinity War

Guardians of the Galaxy Part 1

Avengers: Age of Ultron

Spiderman: Homecoming

Black Panther

Guardians of the Galaxy Part 2

Doctor Strange

Captain America: Winter Soldier

Hope no one is upset its not my personal top five but I am trying to be honest with myself in what brought me the most joy. Look on the bright side I didnt add Blade or Deadpool onto the list which might have pushed some movies (including Black Panther) lower on my list. ^_^

With Regards Michael California

[bittersweetastoria]

TASK 021

Halloween 2008. For months, little Luci had been planning and looking forward to her 13th birthday. Subsequently, also looking forward to that Halloween. Though that was merely because the two fell on the same day, as it had her whole life. She had planned out the most perfect ‘becoming a teen’ party, down to the very last little details. And she couldn’t wait for the day to finally come for her most perfect birthday party ever to happen. In her mind, it would turn out perfectly and she’d be the most popular girl in school until at least after Thanksgiving. But alas, that simply wasn’t how it went down. 

Morning Halloween Day 08. Upon waking, the first thing to reach little Luci’s ears was her fathers yelling voice and the soft weeps of her mothers tears. She was used to it, yes. But that didn’t mean she liked it anymore or anyless. She hated the sounds, she hated feeling like she should hide for fear that his abuse would turn onto her next. Not that she wanted him to go after her mother more, or her brother for that matter. But she certainly didn’t want his wrath on her. Wiping a stray tear away, she got up from her perfectly pink bed and made her way to the bathroom - passing by her brother Wesley heading out as she did. Making a shh motion, she whispered good morning and continued into the bathroom.

After a little while, she was showered and ready for the day. Skirting past her now sleeping and much more peaceful father, the girl made it into the kitchen. “Hi momma.” The new teen, as of just a few hours before, spoke - reaching up to kiss her mothers cheek. Her silent way of trying to make the woman feel better after her husbands tirade. “Hi sweetpea. What would you like for breakfast, birthday girl?” Luci smiled at her mothers words and shook her head. “I just want some juice and a muffin momma. I have cupcakes today, remember? And my friends said we’d get take out for dinner before my party, so you don’t need to worry.” She assured her, taking the glass of juice her mother offered her. “I always worry. It’s part of being a mother.” The woman replied, giving a small smile before kissing the teens head and sliding the muffin basket near her. “Have a good day at school. I’ll see you this evening after work.” With that, the woman wondered off to shower while Luci dealt with breakfast quietly. 

Afternoon Halloween Day 08. The day had gone by slowly. Each minute slowly ticking by to finally pass an hour. The only time things didn’t seem to be going at a snails pace, was during lunch when Luci passed out her cupcakes to her classmates and got blessed by her favorite meal being served at lunch that day. “Pizza day! Lucky me.” The blonde grinned as she got her slices, as well as whatever sides they had that didn’t seem repulsive. She got her usual bottle of tea, something she literally lived off of, and paid for it all before getting to her table. “Hey freaky birthday girl, where's the sweets?” Jacob asked as she sat down. Shaking her head, she passed the box to Cassie first. “Best friend gets first dibs, and choice for birthday girl too according to my mom.” She commented, taking a bite of pizza and opening her tea bottle. Watching as Cass got two out, she nodded for her to pass the box. “Everyone gets one! Honor system boys.” She demanded as Cassie handed the biggest and prettiest one - even marked with a star in the sprinkles - to her. “Thank you.” The blonde spoke with a smile, “No problem, birthday girl.” Her best friend replied, causing her to laugh. From then on, the day dragged until final bell rang.

Evening Halloween Day 08. As soon as school let out, the blonde and a couple of friends made their way to her place to drop their things off. The few friends had made the pact to sleep over after Luci’s party, so they all brought their stuff with them to school to do it all in one shot. “What shall we do first? Party set up or decide on dinner?” She asked as she plopped down in the lawn, leaves circling her on all sides. “Why not both at once?” Cassie suggested. To which, Luci laughed and hugged her best friend. “This is why we keep you around. All the smart ideas.” Luci commented jokingly, crawling over to the bag she’d left out in the back yard full of party supplies she’d picked out herself. “Mom said we can get the tables from the shed, just don’t mess with anything else or my dad will have everyone’s head.” She spoke, trying to play it off like a joke when it was really anything but. 

In an hours time, it was all set up perfectly. Looking like something from a movie or tv show, picture perfect. Menu’s to various take out places scattered before the girls in the lawn as they weighed their options. “I’m thinking pizza.” One girl voted, “Nah, Chicken sounds better.” Another weighed in. At that point, Cassie and Lexi turned to Luci. “What’s the birthday girls vote?” Cassie asked, leaving the blonde to have to think. “How about chinese? Not very birthday-ie or Halloweenie, but I don’t care if you guys don’t. We have plenty of spooky treats for later to out number it anyways.” She spoke tucking her blonde hair back behind her ear as she got up to see if her brother was home, which he was. “Be right back, I’m gonna see if Wes will go get it once we order.” She spoke before going inside, just in time to face her already drunk father. 

“What are you doing out there?!” The male demanded as she was trying to get by to her brothers room. “Excuse me.” She spoke, ignoring his words as she tried again. To which, he just cut her off once more and grabbed her arms. “Answer me damnit.” He demanded, earning a sigh from her. His grip hurt a little, but it was nothing she couldn’t handle. “We’re just hanging out dad. Thinking about what to get for my birthday dinner. Is that so bad?” She asked, her blue eyes looking up to him as Wesley came out of his room which is when their father let go of her. Immediately, She moved from the man and moved closer to her brother. “Hey! You busy? The girls and I want chinese for dinner and thought maybe you could go get it? Momma left me the money for it, you can even get something if you go get it.” She told him, hoping to convince him. Once he agreed, she headed back to the girls to figure out their order as Cassie wrote it down. Luci’s best friend had been voted to go with Wes to help him get the order right and carry everything.

Night Halloween Day 08. Hours passed and the party began. Dinner had been amazing and full of girl talk, and everything before that had been forgotten. The birthday girl was fully set on enjoying her party, no matter what and that’s exactly what she did. Snacks were had, games were played, and people had been requesting an endless loop of Halloween tunes on the radio for everyone to bop around to. All in all, it was a great party. But as most great things do, it came to an end. An abrupt one. All too soon. 

“Luciana Elizabeth Donaldson, get your ass over here!” Her father yelled from the porch, causing everyone to stop and stare. All except for Luci, who stayed stalk still yes but her eyes remained down. She knew what was coming. “Luce?” Cassie nudged her, “Get everyone out of here, please.” She spoke quietly as she heard the door, then her mother's pleads for him to come inside. Just as he went to turn on the woman, Luci unfroze and sped up the steps. “Momma, Go make sure everyone leaves. Even Cassie.” The young teen pleaded, waiting until the woman was doing so before addressing the man who’d yelled at her and now had her wrist. “What?” She asked, to which he just dragged her inside to scream at her and slap her for something she hadn’t even done. 

Within an hour, the party was long over and Luci’s happiness a thing of the past as she sat in her bedroom - costume a tangled mess beside her as she changed into her Halloween themed pajamas. “I hate him.” She muttered, listening as he did to her mother what he’d done to her as soon as the party was over. Only worse. With Luci, he stopped after a few slaps and some touches. With her mother, Luci knew the woman got it much worse. And did so to protect her. The young teen had learned that long ago. She didn’t like it, but she couldn’t tell her mother what to do. Once she heard the eldest Donaldson leave, slamming doors in his wake, she crept into her parents room and crawled into bed with her mother. Pulling covers up over her mom as she did. “It’s okay momma.” She tried to sooth the crying woman, wrapping her arms around her neck to hug her softly. “I’m sorry baby.” The woman mumbled, hugging her daughter back. 

After that, Isabella had gotten up once she told Luci to cover her eyes and went to shower again as well as change into bed clothes. Once that was done, the pair took to the living room and closed out the night with Halloween films on the television. It’d been a good day, a fun evening, and a horrible night. But one thing was for sure.... She’d never forget her thirteenth birthday.