#my heart goes out to those in the good omens fandom on this day

[professionaltrash101]

Broke: unreal unearth is a tale of heartbreak of Andrew's past relationships

Woke: unreal unearth is a journey through Dante's inferno in lyrical form

Bespoke: unreal unearth is a modern day Irish rebel album and is a tale of grief from Ireland surrounding Britain's colonialism

[aziraphales-lawyer]

Literally no other way I could describe it right now.

[black-bentley-niatruc]

Fic

Title: The Mind-Body Problem [part 1/3]

[A bonus smutty thing happening between chapters 20 and 21 of my main Human AU fic]

Fandom: Good Omens

Category: M/M

Relationship: Aziraphale/Crowley

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: filthy smut, check below for any squeaks/no-no's

Additional tags: Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot; touch-starved; Crowley has a praise kink; inexperienced Crowley; experienced Aziraphale (kind of); fluff; first time; first time topping; first time things; chest-fucking; Aziraphale is a Pillow Princess; Crowley is a tease; Aziraphale has an oral fixation; angst (thanks, Crowley!); barebacking; butt plugs; anal sex; low-key D/s vibes, but not a 'proper' D/s setting; rough sex; safe, sane and consensual; kinky

Words: 4082

Originally published: 2024-05-27

Summary

“I want you inside of me, if… if that’s something you’d be amenable to,” his angel whispers, glancing into Crowley’s eyes, heart-meltingly bashful.

Unable to help himself, Crowley repeats with amusement, “Amenable.”

Human AU, Crowley and Aziraphale try new things in their relationship

That's it, that's the fic; can be read as a standalone

As soon as Aziraphale walks through the door to Crowley’s flat on Friday evening, he sets a familiar-looking wooden basket on the floor and wraps his arms around Crowley’s neck, kissing him hungrily.

Which is understandable, really.

Ever since they returned to the continent, there were no kisses and only a few fleeting touches, no public displays of affection – and now Crowley feels like he’s starving.

During the last three or so days, he’s brought himself to climax to the thought of Aziraphale so many times he lost count, partially because he couldn’t stop thinking about everything they’ve done together so far and all the things they haven’t, yet, but also hoping that he’d be able to fucking last a little longer today.

His glorious plan might get thwarted soon, he realises as Aziraphale rubs his hardening length against Crowley’s thigh in a slow, deliberate movement with an accompanying little sound that goes straight to Crowley’s cock, making it pulse with intense arousal.

If only they could move in more than three dimensions – then getting to the bedroom, onto the bed, while simultaneously kissing, undressing, and holding onto each other like men drowning would have been so much easier. As it is, they have to give the tiniest part of their attention to the surrounding world in order not to get some unplanned bruises or worse injuries.

“I’m prepared!” Crowley announces, torn between proud and nervous, once they’ve reached their destination, showing Aziraphale a bottle of lube.

After all, his angel might not approve of this kind of level of presumptuousness.

But the pupils in those blue eyes grow so huge at the implications that Aziraphale looks high out of his mind even before Crowley sets the bottle back on the bedside table.

“Mm, good, I’m prepared as well, so to speak,” says Aziraphale, his cheeks reddening slightly as he squirms minutely where he’s seated on Crowley’s bed.

Crowley’s mind wanders to the contents of the wooden basket, but gets distracted when Aziraphale pulls him into another heated kiss and guides them until Crowley’s lying on top of him, one of Aziraphale’s thighs between his legs.

“I want you inside of me, if... if that’s something you’d be amenable to,” his angel whispers, glancing into Crowley’s eyes, heart-meltingly bashful.

Unable to help himself, Crowley repeats with amusement, “Amenable.”

His cock leaks precome at the mere idea, and here’s Aziraphale asking if Crowley’s amenable to something he’s been dreaming of – day and night – for weeks.

Misreading Crowley’s reaction, Aziraphale attempts to backpedal, “But of course there are other―”

“Aziraphale,” Crowley interrupts him, brushing his fingertips against those pretty sensitive lips. “I am more than... amenable.” Aziraphale beams, but of course that’s the moment Crowley’s concerns come back to eat away at his certainty. “Only... I’ve never...”

“I know,” Aziraphale reminds him, quickly. This time he reads Crowley’s hesitation correctly. “You won’t break me, dearest,” he assures, gently kissing Crowley’s fingers.

“I’m afraid I’ll come as soon as I’m inside you,” Crowley confesses his other worry with a nervous, mournful laugh.

Aziraphale licks his lips, his perfect tongue catching on Crowley’s middle finger. “Well, it’s not a once in a lifetime thing. But I’d be more than happy to help you... take the edge off, before we get to this part,” he offers. “We have time, don’t we?”

“Brilliant; you’re a literal genius,” Crowley chokes out once he hears this solution, so obvious that it never occurred to him. They have time. They have privacy, too. “Do I get to hear you tonight?” he asks, before tracing kisses and licks down his angel’s neck, breathing in the scent of his skin.

Head spinning, he can feel the shiver that runs down Aziraphale’s body. “Most likely.”

Fuck, yes. Finally.

Propping himself up on his hands, Crowley leans away to have a good look at his angel and decide what he’d like to do to ‘take the edge off’, since, for someone who claims to be selfish, Aziraphale has been nothing if not accommodating, repeatedly insisting that the beginnings of their explorations should be about Crowley, about him figuring out what he enjoys most with Aziraphale’s enthusiastic guidance.

Crowley has seen his share of porn, but there was always something about it – the lack of connection, perhaps – that, while doing the job of making him aroused, would also put him off, so he mostly watched out of curiosity, in a way one might see an educational (if not scientifically accurate) program. What it led to is Crowley having some general ideas about things that can be done, things he might like to try, and things he definitely doesn’t.

Of course, his head is empty now.

He wants... oh, how he wants, yes, but he might be in need of a more directive approach from Aziraphale, who seems content to patiently map the skin over Crowley’s sides with reverent fingertips, tracing the shallow hollows between the ribs so gently it almost tickles.

Opening his mouth to admit he can’t decide what to do, Crowley notices the pink nipples, deliciously hardened, and immediately gets distracted.

Aziraphale whispers something that sounds like ‘Gorgeous’ when Crowley straightens and moves to straddle him, seating himself comfortably on the soft thighs, cheeks burning pleasantly at the praise.

“Alright?” he mutters, rubbing his hands against Aziraphale’s chest, and is rewarded with a soft sigh.

He squeezes the pecs together, thumbs teasing at the nipples, his touches getting more insistent and forceful by the minute, until he moves his gaze to Aziraphale’s face to check if he’s not being too rough, and he’s met with a dark stare, quite certain the heat in those hooded, lust-filled eyes could burn him into ashes if he doesn’t look away―

Mercifully, Aziraphale breaks eye contact, glancing at his own chest and licking his kiss-swollen lips. And then he looks back at Crowley’s face with that burning intensity offering an idea, “Do you want to fuck me like this?”

Crowley isn’t sure what he means, because he gets positively bewitched with the captivating way Aziraphale pronounced the word ‘fuck’ – it’s how temptation sounds, for sure – until he notices the valley he’s created between Aziraphale’s pecs and he realises his cock would fit there nicely, indeed, and he lets out a choked out, “Bloody hell, angel.”

The blush on Aziraphale’s cheeks darkens and he squirms uncomfortably, apologising for being ‘crass’ and assuring Crowley that ‘they don’t have to―’, apparently interpreting Crowley’s astonished silence as him being scandalised by the offer.

In reality, Crowley is the opposite of scandalised. He just doesn’t have the words to express the things his angel does to him – the fire rushing through his blood vessels, the affection squeezing at his chest, the stupidly annoyed ‘Why didn’t I think of this first?’.

“Yes, yes, I want to,” he says quickly, his cock so hard it aches. “But only if it’s something you’d enjoy, too.”

The way Aziraphale beams at him is enough to assure him that his angel expects to enjoy himself very much, indeed. His hands help steady Crowley as he shuffles up Aziraphale’s body, heart hammering in anticipation. He remembers the feeling of the thick thighs squeezing around his cock as he thrusted between them and then came over the pale skin of Aziraphale’s buttocks. He thinks about marking all of his angel this way and feels just a little bad about being so dirty and possessive.

One of Aziraphale’s hands disappears from his hip and he makes an embarrassing, pathetic sound at the loss, but it turns out it was just to reach for the lube.

Yeah, won’t hurt to use it, now that they’re prepared, Crowley agrees internally, unscrewing the lid with almost-not-trembling fingers.

“You really are a spoiled pillow princess, aren’t you?” he mutters, slicking his cock with practised ease, realising that Aziraphale isn’t doing much work here, looking very comfortable, watching the show with hungry eyes and a soft smile.

“Oh, you want to see me in action?” he asks with a grin that holds a challenge in it – as if Crowley is expected to earn himself that – even as he pushes at the sides of his broad, soft chest.

Very pointedly, Crowley forbids his mind to go Places right now. He’ll learn what Aziraphale meant soon enough, he hopes. Just stick to the original plan, he thinks, pressing his cock between Aziraphale’s breasts and watching his angel close his eyes and tilt his head back with a shuddering sigh. Make yourself come like this, Crowley tells himself, thrusting experimentally. Come over his chest and neck and maybe face. Ask him first, though; it’s only polite. He adjusts his position and thrusts again. So fucking good.

As if in agreement, Aziraphale moans quietly. Crowley notices two perfectly manicured nails pinching one of the nipples and he bites his lip.

Oh, it’s a good thing his hands are free, he realises with a devious smirk that escapes his angel’s attention. Reaching behind himself, he wraps his lube-slickened fingers around Aziraphale’s cock, eliciting a soft growl. At the sound, Crowley’s hips change their movement from slow and grinding to something faster, more desperate.

The squeeze and slide of slick flesh around his cock is exquisite, the sounds of undeniable, inexplicable pleasure coming from Aziraphale a music to his ears: shuddering breaths and encouraging whispers urging him to keep going, yes, don’t stop��

It’s a little difficult to coordinate, but with his other hand, Crowley touches Aziraphale’s face, knuckles ghosting over the slightly parted lips. Predictably, his angel gasps and attempts to wrap them around Crowley’s fingers. Groaning loudly, Crowley doesn’t let him, teasing mercilessly. He can feel Aziraphale’s legs moving subtly as he squirms underneath Crowley’s weight.

He can’t take it any more, the pressure low in his belly threatening to burst, his cock throbbing with an impending release.

With a feral grunt, Crowley grabs Aziraphale’s shoulders for leverage, bringing himself off with rapid, powerful thrusts spurred on by sighs of undeniable pleasure and whispered endearments, feeling his heart drown in warmth at the sweet ‘I want you to feel good’ and his soul shatter at the unexpected, broken ‘Yes, please, use me’, until it’s just pure ecstasy, nerve endings exploding, pleasure spreading through him in rhythmic waves.

Panting, dazed, and thoroughly satisfied, Crowley slides off Aziraphale to kiss him desperately and wrap his limbs around the soft body, when his angel obediently turns to his side, returning the kisses and touches alike.

“Fuuuck,” Crowley groans, one of his hands pressing into Aziraphale’s chest, feeling his heartbeat and the mess of lube over the hot skin. Wait. “Sorry, I forgot to ask you...” He bites his lip, fingers swiping over his own come where most of it pooled in the hollow below Aziraphale’s throat.

In response, he receives a playful wink and an absurdly innocent smile as Aziraphale’s fingers join his own to smear the pearly seed over his collarbone. His angel is a walking paradox and Crowley doesn’t mind.

“How much time do you usually need?” Aziraphale asks, before kissing him on the lips again, successfully preventing Crowley from giving the answer.

Not that he’s got one. Usually, he doesn’t wait to see when he’s ready for another round. Usually, he comes all alone, which is a thought that he suddenly cannot bear.

“Nnn,” he mewls pitifully into Aziraphale’s hot mouth.

His angel pulls back, takes one look at him, and wordlessly gathers him impossibly closer, planting kisses over Crowley’s forehead and rubbing his hand up and down his spine, apparently not at all surprised – or worse, concerned – with the tears filling Crowley’s eyes.

They’re tears of relief, of longing, of finally finding the yin to his yang, of the missing pieces slotting into their places in his heart. Crowley dares to hope, fiercely and desperately, that Aziraphale’s understanding comes from the fact that he feels the same.

“You’re so perfect,” Aziraphale whispers into his hair, following that statement with more kisses and something that sounds like ‘mine’ or maybe ‘divine’.

“Angel,” Crowley breathes, grateful to feel the first sparks of renewing arousal, because he’s too vulnerable like this, too fragile, not yet ready to trust the whole of himself even to Aziraphale’s gentle hands.

Especially to Aziraphale’s gentle hands.

And he might do it, if he isn’t careful.

“Tell me what you need,” his angel implores, softly.

“I need to fuck you,” says Crowley, choosing the easiest answer.

And Aziraphale, bless him, plays along, even if dozens of emotions seem to flicker over his face before he sighs with contentment and reaches blindly for the pillow to pull it out from underneath his own head.

“I’m a pillow princess through and through,” he explains, catching Crowley staring curiously at his ministrations as he places the pillow under his hips.

He wriggles, probably testing the angle and twists to get the other pillow, but Crowley’s ahead of him, handing it over with a praise-awaiting grin.

“Ah, thank you,” says Aziraphale with a fond, appreciative smile that’s like a drop of honey to the bitter tea of Crowley’s self-image.

Despite looking like he knows exactly what to do – as opposed to Crowley who’s vaguely aware watching and reading all the world’s porn isn’t going to help him here – there is definitely nervousness about him as he moves to reach the bottle of lube, lying forgotten but stark purple against the black sheets.

“And the... er...”

“I’m clean,” Crowley rushes to explain the lack of condoms. He thought about it, how he’d like to feel no barriers between their bodies, and decided to leave the decision to Aziraphale. “But if you want to, or―”

“No, come here,” his angel says, quickly, making it sound like a demand and a request all at once as he settles on the pillows, one of his hands resting on his own chest, the other clutching nervously at the sheets.

Crowley’s kneeling between his legs before Aziraphale utters the last syllable. There are little electric sparks dancing up the backs of his thighs and higher, up, up his spine. His insides twist in anticipation, tickling, almost painful.

So, now, he thinks, now the fingering, as in, prepping, yes?

He almost scoffs at himself loudly. It’s not like he’s never tried it on himself.

Placing both hands on the insides of Aziraphale’s thighs, he traces his fingers down, spreading those lovely legs even more, bending down to mouth at the hard, reddened cock, feeling Aziraphale shift subtly with a soft moan.

God, but he can’t wait to hear him...

Leaning away for a better view of what he’s doing, Crowley hooks his hands over the creases where thighs meet groin, thumbs digging gently into the squishable cheeks to part them...

“Fuck me,” he whines, staring, half-erected cock jumping into full hardness in a matter of seconds. “Fucking... fuck!”

‘I’m prepared as well, so to speak,’ Aziraphale told him earlier.

Oh, he’s prepared all right.

“I take it you like it?” Aziraphale asks with that adorable pleased smile he wears every time he thinks he’s done something clever. No denying his cleverness, now.

The plug looks fancy – expensive and somehow tasteful despite (or because of?) the little discreet golden wings, folded into an elongated heart shape.

“You go in for the kill, eh?” Crowley manages, unable to take his eyes off the sight, swiping his thumb over one of the wings, pressing against it hard enough to make Aziraphale suck in a sharp breath and squirm again. “You rode a fucking bus over here wearing this?”

“It’s rather obvious I did,” his angel sniffs and then groans softly as Crowley tugs at the plug gently, pulling it out a fraction of an inch and pushing back in. And to think he worried he was being too presumptuous. “A stimulating ride, to be completely honest.”

“Decadent,” Crowley mutters, wishing he were there on the bus with him, thinking of the way his naughty angel has been blushing and squirming on his bed for the whole time, leaving Crowley none the wiser, because he’d never expect Aziraphale to casually come to him wearing a butt plug like it’s something that’s just done. Of course, that’s exactly why Crowley loves him.

“Quite.” Aziraphale’s calf nudges Crowley’s hip impatiently as he reaches between his own legs. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to replace it with something more substantial.”

“Bossy.”

Much as Crowley’s fiendish side would love to tease him until he fucking begs for his cock like the shameless slut some people seem to take him for, Crowley’s body opposes waiting any longer. Batting Aziraphale’s hand away, he slowly pulls out the small plug by the wings, watching the tender muscles stretch around the widest part to the accompanying pleased sigh.

Crowley groans softly, seeing the pink little hole slightly open and glistening with slick. As he pours more lube onto his fingers and presses two of them against the warm rim, Aziraphale gives him a pleading look.

“None of that now, please. This whole stretching with three fingers and scissoring as a necessary preparation thing is a myth I’d rather skip.”

Huh.

“So you want me to just...” Crowley attempts to make sure, curling his lube-covered hand around his own cock, suddenly feeling all of his muscles tremble with anticipation.

“Please.”

It sounds so wrecked, as if Aziraphale’s about to cry, and Crowley’s eyes are immediately drawn to his face, checking for signs of pain or regret or uncertainty. What he finds instead leaves him breathless – devotion and raw need and something between a plea and hope. Aziraphale is breathing fast, fists clutching the sheets desperately, burning stare jumping from Crowley’s cock to his eyes and back again. As if it’s ‘a once in a lifetime thing’ after all...

Crowley grasps Aziraphale’s left hip with his free hand, shuffling closer, the head of his cock brushing against the slick opening.

Oh god, he’s never―

Aziraphale gasps, then lets out a shuddering breath. “Do you want―?”

Before he’s asked about wanting a break or to call everything off or whatever unacceptable idea has settled in Aziraphale’s mind, Crowley presses the head of his cock inside his angel, slowly, trying to be gentle but also to savour the feeling.

“Oooh,” Aziraphale sighs, eyes fluttering closed, and wraps his arms around the back of Crowley’s neck. And then, immediately, “More. Give me more.”

What can Crowley do but oblige, really? He sinks in deeper, his overly romantic soul bringing up images of people willingly drowning in the arms of beautiful water creatures.

“Let me hear you,” he says, because he can tell Aziraphale is restraining himself in practically every way except for his focus on Crowley’s own pleasure. And having Aziraphale’s attention in its entirety is not something Crowley seems to be able to handle, not that he’d ever admit it aloud.

“Deeper, don’t stop,” his angel demands in a rich, deep groan that sets all of Crowley’s skin on fire.

As if he could stop.

With his right hand, he grabs at the flesh on the underside of Aziraphale’s thigh, slick fingers slipping over the skin, pushing his leg towards his chest for what he thinks might be a better angle for them both, and finally, finally, he bottoms out, the sharp bones of his hips resting against the cushion of Aziraphale’s bum.

Crowley had no idea the human body is so hot on the inside. He assumed it would feel good, based on his own experimentations, but his imagination pales in comparison to the real thing.

Fuck, they’re―It’s actually happening...

At the gentle tug against the nape of his neck, Crowley obediently bends over Aziraphale until he’s lying on top of him again, propped on his hands, and suddenly they’re kissing.

Crowley sways his hips experimentally and they both moan into each other’s mouths.

Any hotter and it would have been unbearable, he thinks, starting to thrust, just a little, in response to Aziraphale grinding against him insistently.

It is unbearable, the way he suddenly wants to fuck Aziraphale into the bed like a beast in heat, wants to tear him apart in his all-consuming greed, make him scream and cry and lose his grip on Crowley’s leash – while simultaneously, Crowley wants to be gentle and selfless and very much kept on said leash, for Aziraphale to do whatever he desires.

“How do you like it?” he asks softly, against Aziraphale’s lips.

“It’s not about me,” his angel insists, breathing hard.

Crowley snaps his hips, punishing. “How do you like it?” he repeats, but Aziraphale’s groan at the rough push is a welcome clue.

Maybe what they want is complementary.

“Harder,” says Aziraphale, sounding defeated.

Again, Crowley obliges, gasping and groaning at the intense stimulation, at the way Aziraphale allows a few louder moans and grunts to escape his lips, dragging his fingers over the sweat-slick skin of Crowley’s back.

As his moves get even bolder, the thrusts longer, faster, and even more enthusiastic, Crowley feels himself suddenly slip out and he whines in shock at the cold stop to his mounting pleasure.

Before he fully understands what happened, he feels Aziraphale’s hand reaching between them, guiding him back inside without missing a beat, and hears a breathless, “Keep going, dear.”

Crowley learns from his miscalculation and quickly resumes the movements of his hips, adding some experimental twists here and there and trying different tempos. He seals his lips over the skin just below Aziraphale’s clavicle, sucking a bruise there, tasting his own dried come.

Fuck.

“I said, harder, you fiend,” Aziraphale reminds him in a tone that can only be described as commanding, hips rolling slowly up so he can rub himself against their skin where his cock is pressed between their stomachs.

Fuck, yes. I’ll show you a fiend.

Straightening until he’s back on his knees, Crowley digs his hands into Aziraphale’s love handles. They can’t share more kisses like that, he can no longer have those arms wrapped around himself, but he gets to see his angel’s face clearly, so there’s merit to every position, he concludes.

The red-cheeked face he’s admiring says I love you and I need you and I’m happy. And, of course, Fuck me.

It’s everything Crowley ever wanted.

He pounds into Aziraphale almost viciously, drawing from the not-so-secret place in his heart that stores all of his frustration with his angel, all the little ways he’s infuriated by him, all the moments Crowley wished he could be truly angry. The sounds of his hips slapping against Aziraphale’s buttocks – and, god, they probably jiggle with each hit, must be getting red from the smacks – are incredibly satisfying, but there’s yet something more that Crowley wants.

“Louder, angel,” he hisses between his panting breaths.

Aziraphale moans loudly, then growls, one hand curling around his own cock, the other reaching lower.

Crowley rewards him by setting a frantic, brutal pace, and realises, about half a second before it happens, that he’ll get to see what his angel looks like when he comes.

His pretty blue eyes are wide open and sparkling, staring at the ceiling in wonder. The skin of his chest flushes red as he paints it with streaks of his own semen and his back arches off the bed slightly. His mouth is open around a long, deep ‘aaahh’ sound, his face smiling and practically glowing. He looks just like those pictures and actors portraying religious ecstasy and Crowley will never be able to see those the same way he used to.

The hot, wet muscles around Crowley’s cock squeeze around him in pulses, practically milking the orgasm out of him, and he sees blackness.

When he comes to, he’s lying on his side, panting, breathless, thoroughly fucked out and filled with way too many emotions as he looks into Aziraphale’s warm eyes, feels his lips brush gently against his own. In fact, he’s overflowing, and some of it spills out of his treacherous mouth.

“Marry me,” he says, pressing a wet kiss against Aziraphale’s soft lips, and another and another, unable to stop, hand brushing gently over the round, flushed cheek.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

Trying to organize my ask notebook better since I've run out of space under general fandom asks and I would like to know what fandoms you are in so I can ask the correct people about the correct fandoms.

I think my main ones are Bagginshield/The Hobbit, Sherlock/Johnlock, Dragon Age Inquisition, {Pippin/Faramir Merry/Eowyn}/The Lord of the Rings and I dip my toes in a few that I currently can't remember but ones I don't engage in canon at all are Good Omens but only for Crowley/Azirapheal ship, Stranger Things but only for Steve/Eddie ship, The Witcher but only for Geralt/Jaskier things and Ladybug and Cat Noir but only for Adrinette .

Also do you like getting asks that are or include story ideas or snippets?

*Asks are sent for fun, no pressure to answer within a certain amount of time or at all.

Hi Lovely!!!

OH GOSH OH GOSH OKAY, I'm actually part of a lot of fandoms!!! I'm not very active in a lot of them these days but I LOVE asks about them. My main active ones I either participate in or lurk in currently (with my preferred ship in the brackets):

BBC Sherlock (Johnlock)

Good Omens (Ineffable Husbands)

Moon Knight (Layla / The Moon System)

Loki Series (Mobius / Loki)

Red Dwarf (Lister / Rimmer)

Detroit: Become Human (Hank / Connor)

Here are the other ones I still adore and visit frequently, and was a big part of the fandoms:

Darkwing Duck (Drake / Morgana)

Sonic SatAM (Sonic / Sally and Bunnie/Antoine)

TMNT 2005 and TMNT 2012 (Casey/April in '05, none in the other. Leo is my fave character in both series. He always has the best character developments and stories)

And here are some other fandoms I check out and love and adore:

Kingdom Hearts Series (Sora / Kairi, but my fave character is Roxas)

Avatar: The Last Airbender (Katara / Zuko. I'm STILL SALTY that it was literally RIGHT THERE and the much better ship and they still went with the boringest one)

Assassin's Creed Series, more the modern era RPG games but I love pretty much all of them. My fave one is Black Flag, though. I loved it so much.

Our Flag Means Death (Stede/Ed)

And some other random fandom things:

Stitch is my favourite Disney character of all time, and Maleficent is my favourite Disney Villain.

My oldest fandom is the Sonic the Hedgehog fandom. There was a time I had to play every Sonic game ever made, until they got bad for awhile. I participated in the fandom when I was in my teens and early 20s, and wrote a fairly popular fanfic series based on the Sat AM series (which I argue is still the best Sonic TV show ever, and it's Sonic/Sally forever for me, I don't like Amy Rose at all). My fave character from the games is Shadow though, followed by Knuckles and then Sonic LOL.

Kingdom Hearts Series is my fave video game series of all time, followed by Skyrim, then Assassin's Creed. I AM that idiot who will buy all the games of these series Day One. I love the worldbuilding in all three of these series and they're ripe for AUs.

I Love the MCU, despite its flaws. I usually see every single Marvel movie or show when they come out. Aside from the MCU fandoms listed above, my other faves are Antman 1 and 2, Guardians of the Galaxy 1, Avengers Endgame, Doctor Strange, Hawkeye, and Falcon and the Winter Soldier.

Fruits Basket (Kyo / Tohru). I actually love the revamped 2019 series, as it follows the manga and it was completed.

Ranma 1/2 (Ryoga / Akane) is my fave anime though. The manga is really good, I read the whole thing in one night on one of those translation sites.

I also love Dragon Age: Inquisition!! Not super familiar with much of the lore since I've only played it once, but I loved it. The world was so interesting and I want to play The Vielguard, though I might wait until it goes on sale since it's not a must-play at the moment for me.

There's SO MANY MORE I could add, HONESTLY, but I'll be here forever listing shows and nostalgia that still makes me SO happy. I LOVE talking about fandoms so I love getting these kind of asks! I can write more if you'd like LOL.

AND to answer your final question, YES, LOVE THEM. I add them to my 'writing prompts' tag for my or others' reference if a spark of something comes to me, AND I love getting story snippets because even if they aren't, they feel like little gifts for me, you know? Because someone took time out to share them with me, you know?? AHHH, so yes, if you or anyone else has them, please share them!!

Thank you for this ask, I love talking about my other fandoms!! Please feel free to ask me more about fandoms, all!!

[hypnostheory]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Howdy, so I was tagged by @kiwiana-writes , @littlemisskittentoes and @affectionatelyrs , who I’d like to thank for being very supportive and friendly. Thanks besties!

1. How many works do you have in Ao3?

So this is changing by the day sometimes lol, right now I’m sitting at 16 fics, 2 are currently unfinished, 5 are chapter fics.

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count?

Again, changing by the day it feels, but 132,329 words so far. That’s about the length of A Tale Of Two Cities.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Right now it’s FirstPrince (Red, White, and Royal Blue), but I have a Good Omens fic and several Homestuck fics.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

1. i hit my peak at seven feet

2. and that’s the way i loved you

3. something good and right and real

4. trouble’s gonna follow where i go

5. wanna know that body like it’s mine

Combined, these fic have 4,089 kudos.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to reply to every comment, but sometimes it’s a little overwhelming. I absolutely try to respond to all comments that have more than one sentence, but if I miss you I’m sorry and I promise I’m going to get to you at some point!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Sir we write smut here, this is not a tragic writing space lol. If I had to pick I think then I think you don’t want to know me is going to have one of the sadder endings but even still it’s gonna be happy because I’m not a sad writer lol.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

All of them? I mean, the sappiest ending is somewhere between i hit my peak at seven feet and something good and right and real.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No, I mean the closest is someone who said my work was like disturbing or somethingbut I think that was actually a compliment???

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

This is like asking the Pope if he’s Catholic lmao. Yes I do, it’s primarily D/s dynamics, and almost always an AU one shot.

10. Do you write crossovers? If so, what’s your craziest one?

I do not. I sometimes put subtle references to other fandoms in my fics, but no crossovers.

11. Have you ever had your fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge, my partner has tho. If someone found out my fic was stolen I’d like to know, but honestly if you see something I’m writing and get inspired by it just write your own version and tag me so I can read it Y’know.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don’t think so, but I have had someone offer to translate a fic into Chinese. I’m down if anyone wants to, but I only speak English and a moderate level of Spanish so I couldn’t check someone’s work.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

So my partner and I can get very collaborative, and I absolutely run my shit past people before it goes live, but for the most part I’m doing it all by myself.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Listen I love FirstPrince with all my heart but DaveKat is my first OTP and I’m never letting those fuckers go.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but probably never will?

Hmm, so I want to finish that Good Omens fic I mentioned but honestly that started in a weird time and I’m not sure if it’s got legs. Aside from that I’m trying to finish everything I start! (Or at least everything I publish!)

16. What are your writing strengths?

So from comments, I’d say my prose and my dynamics. I’d agree, I think my style is based in my education in poetry, so I can for sure get colorful. And I really enjoy the politics of a relationship, so I’ll sit there and wax poetics about the nature of soulmates daily and nightly lol. I also just write a lot very fast, so that’s a strength I guess.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Descriptions. I’ll explain emotions to death but explaining how people look is more challenging. I also have issues with finishing things, which I’ve been trying really hard to work on.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

So I’m from Texas, so if it’s Spanish dialogue I’m comfortable. For the main part, I’m not going to write dialogue out word for word if the POV character doesn’t understand what’s being said, which takes out a lot of that issue for me. I think putting a foreign language in a fic is something that can be done very poorly, so I want to avoid that.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Publically? Homestuck. That’s my answer.

20. Favorite fic that you’ve written?

Oh god, having to pick between my own kids basically. i hit my peak at seven feet is so important to me, it’s a very personal story and it really catapulted me back into writing fic. I also love there’s nowhere in the world like, which is the first fic I published in this account and is a really fun work about one of my hyper interests, so if you like 80s theme parks and Homestuck, give it a spin.

I’m tagging anyone who wants to do this, so feel free to blame me and take a spin! But also I’m absolutely tagging @futureseaempress 💖

[a-swiss-and-a-spaniard]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers

Thanks for thinking of me @yoellglia ! I had fun reading your answers and even more so trying to answer myself :)

1. How many works do you have on A03?

Jeez, should I consider both of my accounts? Let's do it, why not.

I have 12 fics in total. 7 for Tennis RPF and 5 for the DC Universe.

2. What's your total A03 word count?

37,211 words combined. Ngl, I thought it would be less than that as there are only two multi-chaptered fics and the rest are one-shots. Hopefully, I'll add some more words in the upcoming months :)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently, I only write Tennis RPF. I've been toying with a few ideas for the Good Omens fandom, but I haven't opened a new doc yet. And I used to write for the DC Universe, but I haven't done that in ages.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

(I’m gonna keep this Tennis RPF only bc this blog is tennis themed)

Waking in the Night Light: Fedal share their first kiss in a parking lot.

A New Target: Fedal have sex in the locker room.

Moonlight in Paris: Rafa goes to Roger's hotel room.

Strawberry & Dulce de Leche: Roger and Rafa get ice cream.

Somewhere or Other: Fedal phone call.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes yes yes! At least I try to. Although more often than not I get the notification, reply in my head, then forget to actually write back, and I'm too embarrassed to answer if more than a week has gone by… so apologies for that. That doesn't mean I don’t appreciate every single comment I have ever gotten, they always make my day in fact.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Mmh… perhaps Moonlight in Paris. It's not angst per se but it does have an overall sense of uncertainty.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Strawberry & Dulce de Leche, definitely. Rafa's joy at the possibility of Roger going to his birthday party is everything.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No, thankfully. I’m glad I haven't unlocked that side of fandom yet.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do, but I consider myself a newbie at it (smut writers, pls teach me your ways).

Generally speaking, I prefer it when smut has a little plot. It doesn't have to be anything complicated or serious, I just need a bit of a story behind what's happening for it to feel more organic. I also like it when the focus is on the emotional aspect of it, though descriptive can be nice as well. And I don't mind wordy smut as longs as it doesn't mess with the flow.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Nope, and I'm not a big fan of those tbh

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Story time! Yes 💀 Although it wasn't the whole thing, just a fragment. The fic in question was None but the Lonely Heart for the DCEU. And I only found out bc a lovely person left a comment on my fic, letting me know what had happened and the link to the other fic. I checked and the writer had indeed literally copied and pasted one of my scenes, they'd just changed the names of the characters. So I reached out to the AO3 team and they took care of everything.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No. Stef and I had an idea for a Fedal fic, but who knows if we'll ever get to actually write it lol

14. What's your all time favourite ship?

I don't think I have one, really. I would say my main ones/the ones I keep coming back to are Fedal (Roger Federer/Rafael Nadal) and Superbat (Superman/Batman). Though right now I've been reading almost exclusively Ineffable Husbands (Aziraphale/Crowley), so it mostly depends on my hyperfixation at the time

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oof, that might be a Superbat (long) fic set post BvS, where resurrected Clark has lost his powers (and the sun seems to actually make him sick now), so Bruce helps him to get back on his feet and of course they fall in love in the process. I have the whole thing outlined, sheets of dialogues and a couple of scenes already fleshed out, but I took a break from the fandom bc it was draining me out. Idk, maybe one day I'll get back to it. I mean, never say never and all that, but it's looking highly improbable right now

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm good at setting the tone of scenes, be it fluffy, angsty, whatever.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I tend to write in long, long sentences. Seriously, you should see my drafts, sometimes a whole paragraph can be a single sentence. I don't know if it's due to my Spanish hard-wired brain or what, but I’m working on breaking things up a bit more.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I love it! But you need to make sure readers will still get the message through context, so I think it's best to stick to single words and/or common phrases. Unless, of course, you want to leave your character (and thus your readers) feeling confused.

I do it often when I’m writing Rafa and it's part of the reason I love writing him so much.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

DC Universe

20. Favourite fic you've written?

Tough question… can I say an unpublished one? I have this sort of introspection/character study of Domi, his struggles coming back on tour after the wrist injury and dealing with all the ups and downs. There's not a story to it per se, like I'm not trying to get him from A to B. It's just a dive into his mind, where it gets kinda dark real quick, and it's unlike what I usually go for in tennis fics (fluff), so I've been enjoying the challenge of getting out of my comfort zone there

[the-fangirl-diaries]

Hello!

For those who are just following me or who've just become mutuals with me, here's a post that can help you get to know me a little bit more.

My name's Jessyca and I'm from Canada. I post now and then if I have anything remotely important to say or just wanna spew random thoughts. I'm also Batman, but you're not supposed to know that so forget I told you.🤫 (This is a joke, by the way. I WISH I could be that awesome!)

I am in a lot of fandoms including (but not limited to) Avengers, Good Omens, James Bond, Peaky Blinders, Pirates of the Caribbean, Puss in Boots, Sherlock Holmes, The Sandman, Three Musketeers (2011) Twilight, and Umbrella Academy. I'd be happy to talk about any of those topics, or maybe you can introduce me to some new stuff.

Sometimes it takes me a bit to truly feel comfortable with someone, but I promise you I don't bite! 😁

As far as activity goes, it's a bit of a toss-up. I will usually pop on in the early mornings before starting my day or at night just before bed, but other than that anywhere from 11:00AM - 8:00 PM is usually when I am busy with projects or staring at a blank screen watching the cursor blink.

Sorry, I was trying to be funny there.

Seriously, though. I have about five or six different stories that I am working on and have yet to publish to the world wide web, including two fanfictions, I make audios for YouTube and Patreon that I have to write scripts and record, I also make edits for TikTok.

By the end of the day I am left feeling pretty worn out mentally, so sometimes all I want to do is kick back, relax and watch a little bit of TV and unplug from social media.

On top of that, there are real life obligations I must tend to, as I am sure a lot of you do, and I have family coming over almost every week, which I honestly desperately need because it encourages me to unplug for a bit and live in the moment without worrying about deadlines and stuff.

It is tricky to juggle it all at once and schedules can change and if I don't respond to comments, messages and posts you've mentioned me in right away, please be patient with me and understand that I am in no way doing it on purpose and will respond when I can, even if it takes me a while to do so.

I wish I could just set a consistent schedule and tell myself to work on one thing at a time, but my brain hasn't gotten the message yet, so until then, I greatly appreciate your patience.

Just because we don't talk everyday or sometimes have periods where we don't speak for weeks or months at a time, it doesn't mean we're not friends, it simply means we trust each other enough to check in every now and then.

We all have struggles, some we keep hidden from the rest of the world, we all go through rough times, and if you are one of those people, I see you, I love you and I support you and I want you to take care of yourself, even if it means taking that extra step. Find your safe space, find a place where you can forget about your troubles for a bit, be it online or offline. If you are not in the right headspace to be on social media and need to take a break for the sake of your mental health, please do so!

I value healthy friendships, which means when we have conversations, we both feel comfortable around each other and we respect each other's time and feelings. Therefore, I am not obligated to respond to messages that are inappropriate or rude. Like I said, if I don't respond to messages, it is because I am busy with the things listed above, or I am asleep and I don't have the talent to text people in my sleep and need I go into time zones? They are wacky!

I am sure a lot of us would prefer to keep any sort of conversations light-hearted, and I can understand that because I do tend to worry a lot about everything and everyone, sometimes to the point I can't even sleep at night.

Anyway, that's all. I am sorry if this is long, I feel like I just needed to post this just in case any of you wanted to know a little more about me and my life behind the screens. Get it? Instead of behind the scenes? ...... I'm gonna show myself out now.

[wildfirehq]

CHARACTER NAME: anthony j crowley ( often just goes by crowley ) CHARACTER FACECLAIM: david tennant CHARACTER AGE/DOB: november 23rd 1971, 52 years old CHARACTER PRONOUNS/GENDER IDENTITY/SEXUALITY ETC: he/she/they, genderfluid, hard stares @ his own sexuality like: uhhh there is,,, there sure is some there!!! CHARACTER FANDOM (if relevant): good omens OC OR CANON: canon IF RELEVANT, PLEASE COMMENT ON ANY IMPORTANT CANON DIVERGENCES: n/a but ya know. obviously not a demon etc etc, adapted to fit this universe WHERE THEY ARE CURRENTLY LOCATED & ANY IMPORTANT ALLIANCES OF NOTE: 'i'm on my own side' is kinda the vibes. however, he does work with the likes of hilltop/alexandria/oceanside/the commonwealth IMPORTANT CHARACTER INFORMATION TO NOTE AND SHARE (this could be important headcanons for initial plotting, mini bios etc, supporting docs etc):

for the vast majority of his life before the apocalypse, anthony was a good kind of person. a little rebellious in early life-- that led to his parents kicking him out at 18-- but for the most part, he had a good heart. living in london, they went to college and then university, studying physics with space science-- delaying a little bit and not starting until they were around 22 years old because their focus was primarily on finding a job and a place to live first.

in that time, anthony also pursued a vague music career. a band was started, very punky kinda vibes. he got the nickname crowley then and, for the majority of the rest of his life, crowley spent his time between both of his passions: music and space sciences.

then it happened, late 2010 happened. the world went to hell. and crowley, who thought himself a good person all of his life-- who told himself that people who did good, got good things, lost a little of that faith.

especially when through his vast connections, he learns the truth of just how long the virus was kept from the public. it kinda makes him jaded. and when he ends up stuck stateside, trying to survive with his friends… when he has to kill a dear friend who got bit and turned, it changes something in crowley.

about a year into the apocalypse, crowley is alone. he's fought, watched all of his friends and those he cared about die for different reasons. he's done things he never imagined himself doing, just in order to survive. he no longer feels like the person he was before this all started and it haunts him. he travels from place to place, never staying anywhere too long. afraid to get close to anyone.

by the time he's picked up by the saviors who admire his brutal fighting style ( and maybe some notice him, 'weren't you in that band--' ), he feels utterly disconnected from reality and his humanity. joining with the saviors feels like the smart move. it's how he'll survive. and, well, at least it's a bed to sleep in. he doesn't have to like them. he doesn't have to form close bonds. it's about surviving. it's about not being on the wrong side of that bat.

crowley knows the things hes a part of isn't exactly right nor good. but good never seemed to get anywhere, did it? nothing seemed to really matter.

the day he goes on a pick up with the saviors and sees abe (now going by aziraphale), something long locked away in crowley seems to spark to life again.

it's… hard though. being on opposing sides. it's hard seeing someone you've known through different periods of life, knowing that they too have lost so much. crowley struggles a lot with how to be with the knowledge of it all, and it causes for some stolen moments, but also some intense arguments.

by the time the war ends, crowley has a choice. leave, go and find some place else for himself. move along again. or… try. try at life. at redemption. at trying to build something again and maybe, start to move past the things he'd done.

it's not easy, nothing ever is with the apocalypse. but slowly but surely, crowley has been piecing himself together over the years. there have been backslides, there have been moments he's thought about running away from it all. but he's still here. he's trying. and he really hopes one day he'll feel worthy of forgiveness. ONE SONG THAT HAS YOUR CHARACTER VIBES: unknown / nth by hozier

ADMIN ANDY APP.

[sassysnowperson]

writer's meme - TY to @r0b0tb0y for the tag!

How many works do you have on AO3?

168 - oh man that's more than I'd realized. I passed 150 and didn't even notice!

What’s your total AO3 word count?

1,133,901

So many.

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Since r0b0tb0y and I were just talking about this, I conveniently have a list of all 20 ranked by number of works

134 - Star Wars 7 - Original Works 7 - Marvel 2 - Pirates of The Carribean 2 - The Old Guard 2 - Discworld 1 - Good Omens 1 - Leverage 1 - The Good Place 1 - Avatar: The Last Airbender 1 - Ocean’s 11 1 - Harry Potter 1 - The Goblin Emperor 1 - Gundam Wing 1 - Star Trek: TNG 1 - Hades (Videogame) 1 - Sailor Moon 1 - Russian Doll 1 - Mummy/Wonder Woman crossover

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Lol, looking at my top five - it falls into two categories

1. Fics I wrote right at the height of a fandom's popularity that got a massive reader boost because it was the Hot Thing Right Then

2. Star Wars Fix-Its

~

A Series of Better Decisions - A Padme/Obi-Wan/Anakin SW Prequel Trilogy fix-it where Anakin talks to Obi-Wan and spends Revenge of the Sith in a stressed-out bisexual panic instead of becoming a Space Fascist. He winds up fake-poly-dating Obi-Wan to try to bring down Palpatine, and eventually winds up in a better place due to the power of Quitting Your Job and becoming a househusband.

Galactic Response Time - Captain Marvel - an at the time MCU canon-compliant gen fic that ran the universe forward and explained how Carol really TRIED to show up for all those other crises that happened, but it turns out most of the major MCU disasters only lasted like three days and space is real big, y'all. Featuring Nick Fury cathartically bitching with his Space Bestie.

New Lands for the Living - Fix-it where the sequel trilogy ends Even Worse, Poe goes back in time to mercy-kill the timeline, and much to his dismay winds up married to just-before-Original-Trilogy Luke Skywalker. He has an existential crisis about his own existence, meets some competent women, and starts fixing things.

Life's Little Pleasures - The Good Omens fic where I put all my ace feelings, featuring metaphysical bonding and good scotch.

Flustered - Another Padme/Anakin/Obi-Wan SW Prequel Trilogy fix-it, where Order 66 never happens. Anakin gets some therapy and Padme gets a horrible crush on Obi-Wan.

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I do! I love getting to talk to people about fics, and I so appreciate people making the effort to comment I want to spend some time with them! It's so much easier not to comment, I know.

What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

Hmmm this is not my normal wheelhouse. I usually go angst that gets resolved by the end. Let me look to see what the options are.

Okay, I think we've got two contendors: In Waystation an exhausted Poe Dameron crash-lands in a station where a Bodhi Rook that lived and then hid now lives with Baze and Chirrut. There is a little epilgue that implies they're going to meet again, but the bulk of the fic does end with Poe making the decision to go back to the Resistance, and leaving Bodhi behind. Still, I think it's more wistful, rather than angsty.

Time Enough for Mourning takes it though, I think. Davits Draven/Antoc Merrick, that is entirely about Draven mourning the fact that Antoc has died. The end is still, I think, more cathartic than angsty, but it is overall probably the strongest "break out the waterworks" of my fics.

Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I do occasionally, usually when someone prompts me and I find something in there that makes my brain go!!! I think the strangest is probably The Face Underneath. It's a Cassian Andor/Elim Garak fic where I drag Garak into the Star Wars Universe for a triple drabble series where he is an old mentor of Cassian's.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Mmm, not proper hate. Realtalk, the most devastating one for me was when I posted a fic that the only comment was a spelling critique.

And yes, there was a spelling error, but still, very crushing to have that be the only feedback. (It has since found a few readers that said nice things, very healing :D)

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Yes! Uh - consensual, between adults, often M/M adults, tho I have written explicit femslash, hetfic, and poly piles. It's usually affectionate, often plays with power dynamics even if it doesn't go into full dom/sub.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that anyone has made me aware of, I've never looked.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Had a request or two, but never been linked the result - so not sure if it didn't happen or if I just didn't get linked. I welcome it!

I have had several fics podficced, and I LOVE that. What a joy! Making a blanket permission statement that allowed podfic is one of the best decisions I've made as a fic author. Suddenly, Podfic!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Once or twice! I like the idea of doing it, but follow-through is hard. Hoping to do some co-writing soon though, so we will see!

What’s your all time favourite ship?

Sorry, unrepentant multi-shipper here. I like possibilities, and finding the story that will bring people together, more than one specific thing.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

I don't have ANYTHING I've given up on, but there are a few fics in my unpublished drafts that were beautiful ideas, and really struggled to become contained stories. They all want to be sprawling things, and I have not felt sprawling-thing-writing passionate about those ideas. But, you never know! Inspiration may strike.

What are your writing strengths?

I'd say character voice, along with that, dialogue. Also humor moments that still have real weight and don't undercut the story, as well as straight comedy writing.

What are your writing weaknesses?

You see, I, uh, do this thing where I don't really end a sentence - I think about ending it, I even assume, at some point while I'm writing that I have ended it; I have not and it meanders, persistently, until I have constructed a whole paragraph made out of one chain of words and a hodgepodge of punctuation.

Also the thing where I accidentally use an unusual word five times in one paragraph because my brain has grabbed onto it like an excited puppy and keeps offering it up as the Perfect Word.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

I love having multilingual characters. When writing, I tend to keep all the words in English and use dialogue tags to denote language shift - unless I am inventing the language, or have a speaker of that language willing to beta the bits to make sure I don't mess them up too badly.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Actually wrote and posted? Rogue One.

Fandom of my heart my younger self spun out stories in my imagination about? Where if I had my own computer and easy access to a fic archive they almost certainly would have become spectacularly earnest fics?

ReBoot and Sailor Moon. The Sailor Moon was an AU that took place on the sun and they all had kick-ass horses. Baby Sass knew what was up.

What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

Nope, sorry, can't pick, love them all in different ways for different reasons.

Tagging: @semisweetshadow, @anamelesstraveler, @jules-of-the-crown - and generally if you follow me and want to do it, do so and tag me in it!

[contraststudies]

Thank you for tagging me, @tawnyontumblr​! I’m very bad at doing these writer meme things, so here goes nothing.

1) How many works do you have on AO3?

45 and counting!

2) What’s your total AO3 word count?

376,429. Holy moly that is a fuck ton of words (I only properly started posting on AO3 last May iirc).

3) How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

Four: Critical Role, Good Omens, Hades, and Kill La Kill.

4) What are your top five fics by kudos?

This list is bookended by two PWPs, which I find hilarious given that I seem to have misplaced my smut brain cell sometime in the last couple of months.

On The Matter of Traffic Violations (Good Omens, E)

“Officer Fell,” Crowley says, and leans forward, enough to give Fell a good view of his décolletage. He tilts his head in the way he knows people find deliciously coquettish, glad that he’d had the foresight to apply some mascara before heading out. “I’m so very sorry about this,” he says, looking up at the officer through his lashes. “It’s late, you know, no cars around… Didn’t notice how fast I was going, that’s all.”

[Or: Crowley flirts his way out of a traffic violation.]

Unbinding (Critical Role, T)

This is a great honor, Essek reminds himself, trying not to recoil as fingers run through his hair, working through the tangles. A braid is made of three strands, symbolizing the inextricable bond between the soul, the den, and the Luxon. A recognition of an achievement by the drow who bears it. With each braid, the soul is bound ever closer to its den and to the Luxon.

It is a lesson Essek learned long ago, but one he is never permitted to forget.

[Or: the story of why the Shadowhand wears his hair cropped short.]

No Church In The Wild (Good Omens, E)

The stem of the wineglass in Aziraphale’s hand snaps cleanly in two, but no one seems to hear it—every eye in the room is trained on the redheaded dancer sashaying to the gleaming silver pole, centre stage for all to see.

Oh, Aziraphale thinks faintly. Good lord.

[Or: the one where Aziraphale gets assigned to the red light district.]

abide gold with me (Critical Role, T)

“Okay, Cay-leb,” Jester says, stretching out the syllables affectionately. “You sit right here so we can watch you and Essek try an orange for the first time.”

The Primal Scene (Good Omens, E - a collab with @lookitsstevie​!)

Harriet notices that there’s a crack of light at the end of the hallway coming from the door to the library, and her mood brightens considerably. Perhaps the tutors are still here, putting together their lessons for the next day before they leave for the night. She leans down to pick up a piece of cloth that’s fallen on the rug. Her breath catches in her throat when she realizes what it is – a necktie with a familiar tartan pattern.

She nearly drops the tie in shock at the unmistakable sound coming from the closed door of the library. A sharp, quickly stifled moan.

[Or: Harriet Dowling accidentally bears witness to divine ecstasy.]

5) Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

I try. I really do. My friends (and maybe some of my readers) know that this is difficult for me, mainly because any sort of recognition reduces me to a gibbering pile of tears. I’m working on it though, even if it does take me a million years to respond to anything on AO3. 

6) What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?

God, which one do I choose. I have been referred to as an angst gremlin for a very good reason. I’m gonna go with The Remains of the Day, a Good Omens fairy tale AU I wrote loosely based on Bluebeard.  

7) Do you write crossovers? If so what is the craziest one you’ve written?

I HAVE. I wrote philtatos, a crossover of Good Omens and The Iliad/The Song of Achilles. It’s the only crossover I’ve ever written, unless we’re counting Variations of an Arrangement, which could loosely count as a crossover of the book/radio/TV versions of Good Omens.

8) Have you ever received hate on a fic?

I have not. And hopefully never will.

9) Do you write smut? If so what kind?

I do, and it’s usually of the angst with a happy ending variety.

10) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Hm. How do we define stealing? Just kidding. The short answer is no.

11) Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope!

12) Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Got one in the works for Critical Role!

13) What’s your all time favourite ship?

Steve Rogers/Bucky Barnes was actually the first ship I ever really got into, and they’ll always have a special place in my heart even if I never wrote anything for that fandom. Crowley/Aziraphale from Good Omens of course, and more recently Caleb Widogast/Essek Thelyss from Critical Role.

14) What’s a WIP you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?

Variations of an Arrangement. I loved writing it, and I still want to finish it one day, but it took a lot of brainpower to write and keep track of the plot and I feel like it’s beyond me, at least right now.

15) What are your writing strengths?

I… hmm. Judging by the way people are always yelling at me in their comments, I guess it’s that I can write stories that make people feel things very deeply.

16) What are your writing weaknesses?

I repeat words so often, it’s embarrassing. I use too many “-ly” adverbs. Also, I find myself using the same turns of phrase across several fics lmao.

17) What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

Language is a tricky thing. I don’t want to bore you with discourse. I try not to write dialogue in a different language (especially if it’s not one I speak myself) unless it’s absolutely called for, or if they’re just basic phrases and I’m 100% certain I won’t be getting it wrong. I have read fics where this was done very well though, and I’ve found that it really adds to the atmosphere in those cases.

18) What was the first fandom you wrote for?

It was for this old anime called Princess Tutu. I danced ballet when I was younger and loved it so much – I believe I was only twelve at the time?? But I think the fic may still be floating around on FF.net somewhere.

19) What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

I wrote philtatos in a four-day fever dream. It’s not the most technically perfect fic I’ve ever written or anything like that, but I think it’s the one that reveals the most about who I am as a person. That is an incredibly cheesy thing to say, I know. I always joke that posting that fic felt like offering my still-beating heart on a silver platter to the void, but there you are.

For Critical Role, surprisingly enough it’s this ficlet I wrote called sinners, a small bite of Shadowdrei where I was parsing my ideas on Astrid and Eadwulf’s dynamic and where they stood when it came to Bren/Caleb and Essek. I didn’t realize how fully formed my thoughts were until I wrote that. Fascinating what your own writing will show you about the things that are in your mind.

Tagging with no pressure whatsoever: @naromoreau @jenanigans1207 @saretton @theseedsofdoom @musegnome!

[nat-20s]

MEDIA THAT I RECOMMEND YOU CONSUME INSTEAD OF SUPERNATURAL FOR BOTH HEART AND HEALTH BROKEN DOWN BY TYPE OF MEDIA AND WHY YOU MIGHT LIKE IT IF AT ANY POINT YOU, LIKE MY POOR POOR SEVENTEEN YEAR OLD SELF, WERE INVESTED IN THIS ABSOLUTE GARBAGE FIRE OF A SHOW

with apologies to anyone on mobile who’s readmore function APPARENTLY doesn’t work

(I haven’t watched supernatural for at least five years and, given any sort of luck, I will never do so again, do not @ me)

hello babes. I am talking to you know bc I keep seeing supernatural, unironically, on my dash, and I think we can all do better. I see what’s happening and I think: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hU3i_o5Xd4g

Supernatural is fudge stripes. You are Megan. We can fix this.

So a list of alternate things that I think are overall better written/characterized/just generally more enjoyable that might scratch some of those itches:

TV SHOWS

Good Omens

okay look if u were on tumblr last year u probably already watched this show but like. If u haven’t, it’s only six episodes babe and there’s a large enough fandom that u can go down a fanart hole for days on end

Basic summary: the antichrist has reached that lovely young age where he’s supposed to bring about the apocalypse. An angel and a demon who have decided that actually they like the world as is, thank you very much, try to stop the end times. They’re not very good at it though, which makes for a comedy of errors.

Shared elements with supernatural that you might Vibe with: theologic (mostly christian) exploration/parody/imagery without inherently being a religious show. Fighting off the apocalypse narrative, which I think pretty much always goes hard as hell, but that’s just me. There’s a gay angel who’s socially awkward. There’s a fun very British demon. Touches on the hierarchies of heaven and hell, with framing Heaven as a bureaucracy and blurs the differences between angels and demons.  Pining. Tenderness. A deep nostalgia for 80s music, though in this case it’s specifically queen, and who doesn’t love queen. Main character has a weirdly strong bond with his black vintage car.  Satan is (sort of) fought.

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Gravity Falls

sometimes...things that are kids shows...with a set story and a predetermined ending...are better

(also this isn’t relevant to any of what I’m talking about but I really appreciate that Gravity Falls specifically went against the thing that most begged me about ATLA aka that a 15 year old girl would be like yeah I’m into a 12 year old boy because the 12 year old boy has a crush on me and I apparently don’t get to really have a say in this. How does that make sense.)

Basic Summary: Twelve year old twins Dipper and Mabel go to stay with their Grunkle Stan for the summer in a small Oregon town called Gravity Falls. Turns out this town is filled with all sorts of strange phenomena that they often have to confront, work around, learn about, or befriend!

Shared elements with supernatural that you might Vibe with: The core focus of the show is a close sibling duo, but like It’s obvious that the siblings actually like and love each other and while they have their spats it’s still incredibly clear that they deeply care about each other even with their differences LIKE SORRY SUPERNATURAL YOU CAN’T JUST TELL ME THAT SIBLINGS CARE ABOUT EACH OTHER AND THEN THEY SPEND ALL THEIR TIME FIGHTING AND LYING TO EACH OTHER AND GENERALLY ACTING LIKE THEY CAN’T STAND EACH OTHER’S COMPANY BUT THEN OOOHHH YOU CRY ON TOP OF THE HOOD OF A CAR EVERY THREE EPISODE AND SUDDENLY THEY’RE SOULMATES OR WHATEVER

Anyway. Yeah. GF has a solid sibling dynamic. Monster of the week that builds up to greater over-arching plot. A little bit of body horror, you know, for humor. Fair amount of meta humor playing with the tropes of the genre. A Good Ol Big Bad that tries to pit the siblings against each other. Have to fight the apocalypse (you’ll see this point on like a good half of these recs, I really like ‘what are we gonna do about Armageddon’ media). Interesting creature design. Planned, satisfying ending (which supernatural absolutely does not have, but I still think if it had ended with the season 5 finale like it uhh  pretty obviously was supposed to, that would sort of counted. Don’t revive shows that have clearly already told their stories kids.) Tie in media that gives you some fun extra stories when you miss the characters. (yes I read some of the supernatural novels when I was a c h i l d, yes I’m pretty sure there’s one or two of them still buried somewhere on my laptop, no I don’t wanna talk about it.) Older father figure (?) who owns a tbh kind of shitty shop. Both already in place and found family.

It’s a good show, and it’s two seasons. John Mulaney Voice: I dunno it’s 40 episodes

MINI REC ALERT! (mini recs are basically things that I’m not gonna go into detail about for whatever reason [probably either due to i’m not familiar enough with it OR I just don’t like. Have a bunch to say about it in regards to how it will scratch the itches presented to u by spn] but still seem like a Good Watch)

Mini Rec: Over The Garden Wall. Spooky Kids Media! Episodic! Miniseries so you can watch it in like 2 hours! Cool ass Animation! About two brothers encountering said spooky stuff! Big Bad tries to pit brothers against each other! Might haunt you for the rest of your life! Check it out!

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The Haunting of Bly Manor

I think about this show every goddamn day of my life. (Also not relevant but Greg Sestero makes a brief cameo in it and I was like hi greg my friend greg!)

Basic Summary: An girl named Dani, while staying in London, decides to take on an Au Pair job for two young children, an older brother named Miles (age 10) and the younger sister Flora (age 8) at the spoooooky and mysteeerious Bly Manor, and she gets far more than she bargained for.

Shared elements with supernatural that you might Vibe with: Okay so supernatural doesn’t actually do this but I know I KNOW why we let ourselves be queerbaited in 2012. Four words for you: CENTRAL! GAY! TRAGIC! ROMANCE! You want some pining? Some tenderness? Some LOVE? Some dealing with internalized homophobia but no, like, actual violent onscreen homophobia? HAVE I GOT THE SHOW FOR YOU. If ur favorite episodes where the ones that make you sob (for me it was kevin’s death on god), I recommend this show. If you wished that supernatural literally ever had consequences or perma deaths or didn’t retcon major plot events like every five goddamn episodes so that there could be some exploration of like grief and trauma through the lens of/ higher stakes of horror, I recommend this show. If you really do stay up at night picturing a supernatural that wasn’t made by dumbass cishettie white men hack writers but was actually allowed to have Dean and Cas be in love over the course of the show so they could have like actual development and not the most homophobic gay reveal of all time, I recommend this show. Hell, if you just want a banger ghost story in general, I recommend this show.

As for what they actually have in common: horror setting/aesthetic without actually being all that scary most of the time. A strong sibling duo, though they’re not nearly as much of the focus of Bly Manor. Found family. Strong themes of grief. Questions of what turns someone into a monster (and done much better) An actual, much better noble sacrifice done out of love. Escalation of stakes until there’s a big final confrontation. Semi-big bad trying to tear this family apart. Found and pre-installed family. Sad orphans.

Watch this show. Vibe with me. Cry with me. Yell at me about Owen Sharma

MINI REC ALERT!

Haunting of Hill House- spiritual predecessor to Haunting of Bly Manor, though they’re not actually the same universe/story. However, it’s made by the same dude and has a shared aesthetic/sensibilities/some of the cast. This is only a mini rec bc I haven’t actually seen it, but I’ve heard good things and that it, while much more heavily leaning into family dynamics, has similar themes of exploring Grief and Trauma through ghooossstttsss.

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Community

Okay I know that this may seem like a Wild rec considering community is a school sitcom with basically Zero paranormal elements but just like. Hear me out. And no this isn’t just because I think it’s a realy good show and I want more people to watch it, though that is a factor. If I was just recommending comedies that I think are good and more people should watch regardless of them serving as a replacement for supernatural I would demand you all go watch Galavant and Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. I’m gonna demand it anyway. Everyone go watch Galavant and Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. Now back to your original program:

Basic Summary: A group of students at Greendale Community College form a Spanish study group, and things quickly go Off The Fucking Rails in the best way possible.

Shared elements with supernatural that you might Vibe with: All right I’m gonna be real honest this rec is for all of my (correct) bitches who’s favorite episodes of Supernatural were French Mistake, Changing Channels, and/or Mystery Spot. You think if Supernatural would’ve been fucking fantastic if it had been a committed comedy instead of a CW melodrama that occasionally landed some admittedly really fucking funny episodes/concepts, Community (and the movies on this list) will gently take you into its loving arms and give you everything you desire. It’s about the Meta comedy. It’s about the discussion, exploration, and subversion of common tropes within the format. It’s about the grand use of group/ found family dynamics in order to max both the goofs and the heart. It’s about fantastic callbacks. It’s about having one of the few “asshole with a heart of gold” leads I can actually stand because. You know. Growth. It’s about the INCREDIBLE genre and  pop culture parody. Which genre do they parody, you ask. All of them. They parody all the genres. The glee parody episode is a fucking masterpiece of television. If you don’t want to watch a show that features a Halloween party where everyone turns into zombies and the ABBA discography blasts in the background, you can stop reading right now, because I can guarantee you won’t be interested in a damn thing I have to say.

MINI REC ALERT: The X-Files. I’ve also never seen this but a: everything I’ve seen out of context has been fantastically weird and delightful b: it appears that there’s a general consensus that Scully and Mulder are one of the only valid straight couples so it’s probably pretty fun and c: let’s all be honest. Supernatural was already basically an x-files rip off, it had like half of their original writers swiped from the x-files crew, I’m pretty sure if you liked especially the first couple of seasons of supernatural, you’re gonna like the X-files.

~~

Subcategory: TV SHOWS ( A WHOLE TWO OF ‘EM, OR MORE LIKE ONE AND HALF IF YOU WANNA GET TECHNICAL) I’M SPECIFICALLY RECOMMENDING FOR THAT COCAINE HIT OF PURE UNADULTERATED UNCUT 2012 TUMBLR NOSTALGIA

BBC Merlin

Yes, I know the show ended in 2010. Yes, it still provides that 2012 Tumblr nostalgia. 2012 Tumblr is a feeling, not an actual time period.

I love this stupid show. I plan on rewatching it all over the month of January. I harbor a deep amount of fondness for it. It’s why every time I see literally any depiction of Merlin I get just so fucking excited, and why I’ve consumed as many ridiculous Arthurian adaptations as I have (side note: my two favorite other ridiculous Arthurian legend adaptation are Avalon High, a DEEPLY silly DCOM that is required viewing to level up friendship with me, and The Kid Who Would Be King, which is the only movie that I think truly understands the comedic potential of playing a King Arthur Adaptation mostly straight but everyone in it is 12. I’m not sure it intended to be as fucking funny as it was, but again, they’re all middle schoolers. I have never been more jealous of an actor than I was of the 22 year old that got to play a 16 year old dumbass Merlin who was sometimes also Patrick Stewart and did all of his magic with ridiculous hand gestures That should’ve been me that should’ve been me that should’ve been me. Also Sword in the Stone by TH White is pretty good, because Merlin knows germ theory in the fantasy 400’s and he just uses it to be petty mostly. Also listen to High Noon Over Camelot by The Mechanisms. Also Also I tend to prefer family friendly adaptations because they don’t have the uhhh. You know. Incest and sexual violence of the original legend. Love to Not have that shit!) Whether you watched it initially and are due for a rewatch, or you’re intrigued enough by the concept of the show to watch it for the first time, you should join me on this wild wild ride.

Basic Summary: You know who Guinevere, Arthur, and Merlin are, come on. BBC said let’s make em all YOUNG let’s make em SEXY let’s make em FAMILY FRIENDLY and let’s make magic REALLY SEEM LIKE A THINLY VEILED ALLEGORY FOR BEING GAY BUT TO THIS DAY IM NOT SURE IF THAT WAS INTENTIONAL OR NOT BUT IT SURE SEEMS LIKE IT WAS. @ THE BBC MERLIN CREATORS WHAT IS THE TRUTH BECAUSE THERE WAS SOME INTERVI-

Basic Summary but like a bit more helpful: A BABY version of Merlin (and by baby I mean like 20 year old.) is sent from his small town to the big city the Kingdom of Camelot to find his destiny. Staying with the town physician and friend of his mom’s, Gaius, he ends up as both his assistant and personal manservant to Prince Arthur. But in a kingdom where magic is punished with death and the prince seems hell bent on getting himself into situations that are going to kill him, the young sorcerer has his more than his share of work cut out for him.

Shared elements with supernatural that you might Vibe with: Primo supremo queerbaiting. Like, yeah, okay, it’s queerbaiting, you know it’s queerbaiting, but you watch some of the scenes and ur like okay. I know why I let this bait me. Obviously with a modern show, I would expect more, I would expect better, I would raise my standards, but I gotta admit. Some of these scenes are fuckin compelling as hell, and the subtext is like barely sub. Monster of the week shenanigans. Some awful CGI creatures but like a charming awful. Like the kind of awful that tells you their very limited budget was more focused on cool swords than realistic creatures. Episodic stories build into a more overarching plot, with things getting darker in season 4/5. Shitty father that end up eating shit and while the son of said father is rightfully conflicted and upset over the death it’s cathartic and victorious as all hell for the audience. Multiple hot evil women, and I love hot evil women. There’s also nice hot women, which is a bonus. These women don’t all immediately stupidly die, so that’s a nice change. Also like a LOT of sarcastic humor and shenanigans if u like Sass Merlin is there for u personally name a more iconic line than “Oh I’m sorry, how long have you been training to be a prat, my lord?” AND THAT’S IN THE FIRST FUCKIN EPISODE brilliant amazing fantastic show stopping. Also you know those like dumb hijink episodes where like Dean was possessed by the spirit of a dog or some shit? You bet your bottom fuckin dollar BBC Merlin has those kinds of storylines. Also I know some people go to spn bc it had that HUGE fanbase and like BBC Merlin’s fanbase is still SURPRISINGLY poppin even though it’s been a decade since there was new content so like. Have fun!

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Doctor Who but Specifically the RTD Era

Look I’m not here to say that the first four seasons of reboot doctor who are the only good doctor who or inherently better than all the rest (though the RTD era is my favorite personally) BUT when ur seekin that sweet sweet superwholock frenzy nostalgia, this is the ‘who’ that is being referred to. Also like. Stan 9. We should all collectively stan the ninth doctor. Chris Eccleston, the Objectively Best Famous Chris, deserved better.

Basic Summary: An immortal alien that goes by “The Doctor” travels across time and space with a variety of different companions, often to try and save the day or fix a (sometimes self created) mess. It’s distilled campy sci-fi with a family friendly tone that has made me cry on several occasions.

Shared elements with supernatural that you might Vibe with: Monster of the week that, you guessed it, builds into bigger overarching plot style narrative. Fighting off the apocalypse, but like every couple of weeks because worlds are in danger a LOT. A semi-tragic romance that made people go absolutely buck fuckin wild bc pining n shit. Wamen, but they aren’t fridged. (actually for real though none of the main women die and I just think that’s really fun and flirty even though I could go on a COMPLETELY SEPARATE rant about the injustice of one of the character’s ending YES season 4 is my favorite season and one of my favorite pieces of media ever and I am currently actively recommending it to you  YES im still fucking pissed over how it ended YES we exist) Specifically, a Wonderful and Very Excellent woman named Donna who goes on a spa trip that doesn’t end up going very well. That seems like a highly specific example, and it is, but it did happen in both shows. (Also, to anyone that continued watching SPN after like idk season 9 what happened to Donna? I always liked her and I know she became a recurring character so like DM whatever probably injustice was the end of her story line pls and thank you) I’m also extra specifically recommending for Supernatural Fans and also The World At Large:  Season Four of Reboot Who. I rewatched it last year and it still goes so fucking hard. Donna Noble is the best character in existence. In regards to the appeal for SPN, personally I think the best part of SPN was when people who are soulmates went on adventures and tried to save the day and it was a good mix of banter and sincerity AND GUESS WHAT’S BASICALLY THE ENTIRETY OF SEASON 4 OF DOCTOR WHO. It’s so good y’all I wish Everything was about soulmates going on adventures and trying to save the day.

OKAY TV SHOWS DONE TIME FOR M O V I E S which I don’t have nearly as many recs for but uhh here goes

What We Do In The Shadows/ Shaun of the Dead

I’m lumping these two together bc my reasons for recommending them are largely the same, and I would call them tonally similar enough that if you like one you’ll probably like the other

Basic Summary (Shaun of The Dead): Uh-oh! London’s had a break out of some of that good ol’ zombieism. Shaun and friends decide to hunker down in a local bar, but they have to get there first. Will they survive? Will they fuck up some zom zoms? Who’s to say?

Basic Summary (What We Do In The Shadows): Some vampire roommates dick around. I think there’s technically, like, a plot, but it’s really just about some vampires Doin Their Thing. Vibin.

Shared elements with supernatural that you might Vibe with: This is kind of similar to the Community recommendation, in that supernatural had the opportunity to be one of those things that was both a parody of a genre but also just a really good example of the genre. WWDITS and SotD are both those things for vampire and zombly movies, respectively. Have the aesthetic and some of the themes of a horror but is not actually all that scary. Horror Comedy is a god tier genre and I don’t know why it’s not more widespread. Fun monsters/cast of characters in general, so at least one person in it is probably going to make you go “oh gender” ya know? With SotD you have the fantasy power trip that comes with like any piece of media that involves hunting monsters. With WWDITS I go “yep that’s how bisexuals dress” and I Will Not Clarify which character I’m talking about.

MINI REC ALERT: All of Taika Watiti’s filmography. Thor:Ragnarok is one of like 3 marvel movies that I consider genuinely fucking fantastic completely independent of the MCU and my own tendency to be like “hurr bdurr I love. Superheros”. For the one that is most tonally like Supernatural But Significantly Better and Written By Someone Competent I think I would say try out Hunt For The Wilderpeople. It’s got a reluctant curmudgeonly father figure and I KNOW some of you motherfuckers were so invested in spn when you were like 16 bc you had daddy issues. This is a callout post for my friend [REDACTED], who I should text to watch Hunt for the Wilderpeople, actually.  

MINI REC ALERT X2!!!: Bram Stoker’s Dracula. I’ve never seen it but it has both Winona Ryder AND Keanu Reaves so like. Goth bi rights.

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Happy Death Day (and Happy Death Day 2 U)

happy death day was one of those movies that I saw the trailer, went “eh”, heard other people say it was great, watched, and went holy fuck this slaps. Not nearly as much of a slasher film as the trailers implied if im remembering the trailer correctly

Basic Summary: Our main character Tree keeps waking up on the day she was murdered. The day resets every time that she dies. That’s right, it’s a time loop storey babey!!!!!!!!!!!

Shared elements with supernatural that you might Vibe with: If you were anything like me you were foolishly lulled into supernatural for way longer than you should’ve been on the promise that the characters would idk like grow and change and become better and learn lessons and some of that would be through the power of receiving love and kindness. You know. Like how good writers would do it especially if their main characters are kind of dicks that really should make some changes. Well, Happy Death Day fucking delivers on that promise in SPADES. It’s about growth! It’s about change! It’s about making the active decision to become a better person and putting effort into doing so! There’s heavy themes of like grief and trauma and acknowledging them and facing them head on in order to move on and the negative consequences of refusing to do so and just trying avoid it until it goes away. There’s a romance that makes my dumb little self do the pleading face emoji. Tree is also one of the only good asshole with a heart of gold characters. I also think media is improved by having at least one character that is a Good Good Boy (note: Good Good Boy character does not have to be a man.) and Happy Death Day has Carter. Oh on that note: Tree Voice: I’ve only had character for (the same repeating over and over) a day but if anything happens to him I’ll kill everyone here and then myself. Also the movie is funny so like hell yeah.

that’s all I got for relevant movies right now

BOOK RECS

jk i’m illiterate. Everyone should feel free to go ahead and add their own suggestions for this section The best I can do is uhhhh I think y’all would probably like Mira Grant’s novels, particularly the Newsflesh stories, bc sibling dynamics. Also the book The Haunting of Hill House is really good. Ballad of Black Tom slaps? There’s of course the Good Omens novel that the show was based on. I’m about to recommend some podcasts after this section which will include to Welcome to Nightvale because of course it will and the tie in novels for that slap, especially It Devours!, and I’m pretty sure they work as stories even if you know nothing about the podcast. Also also I think you should read “The Long Way to A Small, Angry Planet” by Becky Chambers It’s not thematically similar to supernatural at all but it’s one of my all time favorite sci fi novels and only like four people have read it which is a goddamn TRAVESTY.

Anyway yeah that’s it that’s all there is. Onto the medium that is like books but I can fold laundry or cook while consuming their narratives.

PODCAST RECS

Okay so this is getting uhhh wicked long so I’m gonna limit myself to only three full blown recs and a

mini rec

Alice Isn’t Dead

Fuck me running this show is so good. Literally hands down my all time favorite (and scariest!) horror podcast. Mamma mia, that’s a good fuckin story. The Book version is also good and has fewer Weird events but some further character development so I recommend them both.

Basic Summary: After her wife Alice disappears mysteriously, Keisha takes up a job as a long haul trucker, traveling all across America in order to find her, but ends up finding so much. Pursued by a deadly creature she calls The Thistle Man, the stakes of her journey are raised.

Shared elements with supernatural that you might Vibe with: okay so I have a lost of bullet points of things that appealed to me specifically about supernatural and how no other shows covers all of them which sucks bc it means I basically Yearn for a show that’s supernatural but good. Alice isn’t Dead, however, hits the most of these bullet points AND is so fucking good. It has monster hunting. It has stopping a cataclysmic event BUT also discussion of the cyclical nature of events such as these and how the fight never truly ends but you can make some fucking progress nonetheless. It has a central gay romance that’s actually a central gay romance. It’s the ONLY show on this list that really hits that the weird and dark underside of americana vibe but specifically the americana of not like suburbs and shit but that eerie haunted feeling you get when you’re hours into a late night drive on open roads with no civilization around and an expansive sky and it just Seems like something should be watching you. Have you ever been out for a walk at midnight and encountered a deer and you looked into each other’s eyes and it felt like it was telling you a message that you couldn’t possibly hope to parse? Have you ever felt an incredible sense of deja vu eating in a restaurant you couldn’t have possibly been in before, because you’ve been to a thousand diners a thousand times just like one, and there’s an incredibly sense of homogeneity even though you’re 2000 miles away from anyone and anything that could possibly know you? Have you ever traveled to an area that seems to be stuck in a bubble of time, the only thing that shows any evidence of having aged past 2006 being yourself, and you wonder how your cell phone even works around here? THAT’S the spooky americana I’m fuckin talking about! Messed up road trips! Too much goddamn space! America is scary because it’s big and Filled With Things but also Not Enough Things! Fuck yeah!!!!! That time bubble fuckin EXISTS in Wyoming the most recent song on the radio I heard was fuckin Hey Soul Sister!

Also has a thing where like are there even good guys and bad guys in a conflict or is it all just one umbrella nightmare that you’re trying to stand against in anyway possible (u kno..like how the overarching structures of both heaven and hell were kinda fucked in spn? No spoilers but similar shit be happenin in Alice Isn’t Dead). Exploration of what makes someone into a monster, like how do you go down that path? Also this is the only show on this whole damn list that southern gothic music really suits it so points for that.

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The Magnus Archives

You know I had to do it to ‘em.

Basic Summary: Jonathan Sims has just become the Head Archivist at the Magnus Institute, a “research” “facility” that looks into paranormal/esoteric/unexplained phenomena.

John Mulaney Voice, Again: Nobody knows what the archivist is going to do next, least of all the archivist. He’s never been in an archives before, he’s just as confused as you are.

Shared elements with supernatural that you might Vibe with: Oh fuck this document is over 5k long I said I wasn’t gonna do this hhhhh so lipton lightning round: Slowburn Gay Romance but Actually Canon, Monster Hunting but Hey What Even Is A Monster Anyway, Acts Somewhat like a Loosely Connected Horror Anthology until it DOESNT, Little Things Build to Bigger Narrative, Characters Be Goin Through It (On God These People Need Therapy), Trying to Prevent/Fix The Apocalypse (X2!!!), Smug Asshole Big Bad,  Horror as a Metaphor For Various Shit, Basically if you thought that the Men of Letter concept slapped and you think it should’ve been the whole damn show including being Deeply British you would probably really fuckin like TMA. Also if ur like the ideal piece of media is a horror tragedy but also like it’s a wacky sitcom but also also fuck cops. U will like tma.

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Welcome to Nightvale

IF ANY 2012 TUMBLR FANDOM DESERVES TO MAKE A MASSIVE COMEBACK AND BE EVERYWHERE AGAIN AND ABSOLUTELY FLOOD MY DASH IT’S WELCOME TO NIGHTVALE WHY DID WE ABANDON THE SHOW THAT TREATED US THE MOST KINDLY DID YOU KNOW THAT EPISODES 108-110 ARE THE BEST FUCKING BUILT UP NARRATIVE REVEAL THAT I HAVE WITNESSED IN MY LIFE DID YOU KNOW THAT IT CONTINUED TO BE REALLY FUCKING GOOD AFTER MOST PEOPLE STOPPED LISTENING DID YOU KNOW CECIL AND CARLOS ARE MARRIED AND THEY HAVE A DOG AND A TODDLER NOW BECAUSE OF ALL THE GAY PODCAST PROTAGONISTS CECIL GERSHWIN PALMER LOVE OF MY LIFE ELDRITCHIAN CHEERLEADER AND CERTIFIED BIMBO KEEPS FUCKIN WINNIN BABY. DID YOU KNOW THAT CECIL THINKS PEANUT BUTTER IS A ROCK.

Basic Summary: Welcome to the sleepy desert town of Ņ̶̏ight V̶͚̰̮͗̔̊̊ale! Community radio how host Cé̵̟͚͕̗̞̙͂͑̽̄́c̵̤̼̞͈̪͓̍̽̋̚̕͜il Pǎ̵̧̨̢͚̻̈̂̄̇͐̇̊̀̆ͅl̶͚͎͕͉͖̬͓͑́̐̒̍̿̈́͢͜͝ͅm̸̧͙̟̖̠̳̬͋́͋́͌̚̚ͅȩ̙̖͎̖͂́̒͐͜͞r̢̢̛̰̻̮̺̩͙̼̈́͋̀͘ is here to k̠̠̰̦͙̯̥̎̄̆͌̎̀̿̔̌̚ê̷̢̬̥̞̩̯̘͒̽̈̓͐̂̔̍e̶̡̝̗̺̫̪̜͆̓̿̈͌͌̆͒͞ͅp̵̹̗̬̼̠̬͙̏͐͐̉̅͊͊́͟͞ͅͅ ỷ̛͙̞̦̦͖̑̉̌̎͞͡͡͝ͅo̧̧̥͎̻̥̲͇͋́́̔̈͌͞ǔ̸̬̯̫͇̦̮͕̤̲̯̽̔̀̔͆͋̈́͘̚ up to date all the local happenings, including w̸̢̢̢̧̡̡͍͖̻̳̹̼̼̰̬̭̱͔̲͙͍̰̠̥̺̝͖̺̖̼̮̼̞̳̞̜͉̤̯͇̖̳͖̠̙̺̲̤͇͈͚͓̮̭̱̭̩͚̟̥̬̟̻̝̼̖͚̘͐̆̅̂̃̈́͆͊̉̏͒́̈́̋͗͑̄̉́̐̌́̿̌͛̾̎̊̾̃̈́̉̔̍̐͛̕͘̚͜͜͠͠é̵̢̡̧̨̨̡̧̨̡̛̹̥̥̞̮̯͙͈̻̝͓͖͙̦̰͍̖̜̲̰̞͎͈̭̯̳͕̗͓͈̭̫̼̯̪̞̯̰̲̘̭͎̪̱̗̝̝̞̤̱͉͙̯͎̬͎̙̜̗͉̩̦͕̪̳͇͙̺̙̰̠͚͎̜̠͔̬͎̺̣͕̜̊̓̃̐̂́͂̎̐̾̔̽̀̉́̍̊̂̿̎͂͐̎̐̄̍̔̋̐̃͗̈́͂̀̒̊̎͘͘̕̚̕͜͝͝͝͠ͅͅa̸̡̧̡̡̨̡̨̛̛͙̣̘̳͎͖̥̝̟̱̩̥͙͉̝̲̙̮̩̩̹̱͔͎̥̹̻̜͚̭̬̳͚̤̙̖̯͎̱̫̞̪̻͖̱̞͔̭̻̺͚͚̯̬͓͓̳͇̳̦͓̞͈̮̤̭̣͉̲̞͚̘͗̆̃͌̅̍͊̓̈̇̌̒͊͑̊̏̊͌̈̓̿͗̒̏̒͊͒̏̃̎̒̀̅̾̍̀͘͘͜͝͠ͅt̵̢̡̨̧̧̛̛̛̯̤͓̘̻̤͓̪̰͔̪̝̫͎̻͔͈͎͔͙͕͈̰͓͍̀̏͒̆͋̈́̈́͂̔͋͆͂̅͗̍̆̍̆̔̑͊̏̈͒́̽͊́̿͂́̓͛̽͐͌̌̐̈̇̃̓̆̍̅̃̔̚̕͜͝͝͝ͅͅh̸̨̨̡̢̢̡̢̧̡̧̢̡̨̡̭̜̬̬̙͕̗̙̻̯̠̘͙̻̥͉͚̼̗͚͇͉̰͍̥͉̗͎̬̫͖͉͔̼̮̯̞̫̬̟̻͉̖̙̥̫͖̬͚̟̜̭͇͎̭̘̝̲̤͕͎̰̭̗̯̮̤̙̙̯͍̞̭͚͔͎̞̹̲̟͉̩̭̖̱̠͍̺͈̟̩̋̆̈́͆̍̆̄̏͜ͅͅȇ̸̢̢̨̨̧̛̜͍̺͎̬̪͙̻̝̣͓͈̺̩̳̟̲̠̣͈͎͎͈͉̙̪͖̳̺͇̹̊̍͊͑̿͊̌͛̿̓͊̾̀͂͛̉͆̾̽͆̈̏͛̊͛̍̈́̇͋̔͂̑͐̂̿͊̽͑͘̚͘͝͝͠͝ͅͅŕ̵̨̡̨̨̢̧̡̧̨̘̟͙̦̲̲̪̦̙̼̠̳͚̞̦̞͖͚͇̳͖̲̭͕̜̫̳̖̙͖͉͎̘̘̤̠͈̬͕̝̻͚̥͍͕̠̥͙̙̪̖̯͍̘̘̲̣̹̜̪̲̭̟̮̫̖̤̰͔̩̩͉̲͚̟̝̦̬̪̘̬̮̱͔̻̦̼̃̐̂͋̐̅̋͒̉͛́̅̈́̒̒͆̑̆͊̒͒̀̍̈́̍͌̍̏̔͋͌̒̍̌͛̓̈̂̐̕͘͘͜͜͝͝͝ͅͅͅ ̶̢̡̨̛̠͇̹̯͕͍̻̟̼̼̗̩̱̗̙̱̥̜̬̫̜͎͉̺̣͓̟̯̱͖̣̞̠̝̥͍̲̳̙̠͔̹̘̲̲̻̖̈́̊͋͜͜ą̵̡̧̟͕̬̳̜͈͈̳̝̜̣̬͔͈͈͎͉͍̯̟̞̺͎̝͇̰̥͖̬̯͙̤̬̼̲̦̯̭͓̠̺̳̱̰̮̎͋͆̈́͌͆̎̉̓̇̐͋͋́̃̉̈̄̏̓̉̿̅̒̉̒̉͂͛̄̀̇̒͊͛́͊̎́͆̌̆́̌͂̈́̽̋͛͗̑̊̀́̍͊̌͆͊͐͆̅̒̊̉̾̄͛̑̕͘͘͘͘͝͝͝͝͠͠͝n̸̡̛̛̛̛̛̙͎̬̦̠̼͓͈̝̾̍͑͛̅̒̾́̌̍͛̇̋̇̓̏͛̔͛̈́͆̿̌͐̿͊̿́͒̍̃̀̈͐̐̆͐̉̒̂̉̀̅̇̾͋̍͒̋̈̌̿͒͐̍́͗̀̌̌̚̕̕̕͘̚͘͘̚͜͠͝͝͝d̴̡̢̛̛̛̺̠̳̬͎̞̲̣̲̱̳̪̹͉̝̠̱̗̙̫̠̹̼̙̝͉̲̟̮̃̽̌̅̔̾̈́̒̽͑́̒͋̓̈́͆͋̽̒̃̽̋̐͌͂̍͑́̽̋̍͗̋͗͂̅̽̈̈̾͐̄̃̕̕͠͠͝͠͝ͅ��̢̙̮̻̹͈̦̙̞͚̜̙̖̞͓̙̭͉͜ͅ ̵̡̡̢̛̛̗͚͍̺͇̲̳̯͓̰͍̙̮̙̜̟̞̣̼͕̝͔͙̺̫͈͈̠̻̘̱͍̦̭͔͈̤̺̗̮͕̦̞̘͍̯̻̝͓̤̳̫͔̩͉̬̈́͋̈́̐͒́̔́́̿̓̆͐̎͆̇͒̄̈̿̓̑̾̏̔̿͊̌͆͒̒͊̓̅̓́̔̅̀̀̀̃̿̂̑͂͆̅̎̾̏̓̂̈́͛͌̇̾͌͐̈̂̆͐̅̓̍̓̃̆͗̃͛̏̒̌̀̅͊́̽̐̆̿́̌͘͘̚̕͘̕̕͜͜͜͠͝͠͝͠t̷̢̥͓̄͗̾̄̅̚͜r̵̨̡̨̧̧̢̛̛̛̛̛͍͙͚̥̱̞̜̦̜̼̺͉̠̬͎̰̻̜̼̫̤͓͖͖̤͇̞̥̖̈́͊̆̓͊̑̑̋̒̈́̔̆͆́̐͛͑͊͋̇̈́̓̑̍̏͐͛̽̋̎͑̃̈́͒̇̂̇̌͂̀̍̊̇̓̋̈́̌̏̕͘̚̕̚͝͝͠ǎ̴̡͓͓̯̘̥̱̱͖̦̺͓̘͉͖̞̟̦͈̜̥̰̘̞͈̦̠̼̯̙̭̼͚̟̖̲̠̝̜̐̅͆̏̈́̍́͂̃̾͑̓͋̽̄̾́̾̆̾͒͋̎͂̈́͘̕̕̚͜ͅͅf̷̢̡̡̧̢̨̡̧̢̢̧̡̧̫͖̖͇̲̫̮͕͉͓̩̪̳̹̩͎̖̟̤̤̲̟̪̫̻̻̖̟̦͉̼͎͖̭͍͖͎̖̳̳͙̜͉̝̘̺̖͚̙͉͕͙̯͖̞͚̮̲̻͉͙̺̭͓͎̤͙̦̦̺̯͕̜̰͍̳̙̦͉̪̥́͋̓̅̀͋͐̀̄̊̆̉̒̐͒̀̏̈̇̊̉̆̐̏̾̀̀̓͛͆̍̾͗͌̀̄̔͒̀̍̈́͆̔̒̑̏̍̏͆́̾̐̂͋̂̔̂́̓̓̌͌̉͛́̒̐̽̏́̑͊́̌̆̂̑͋̇̈́͌̑̿̅͗̚̕͘̕̚͜͠͝͝͠͠f̴̨̨̛̹͌̂̓͌͛̀͑̾̓̍͗̽͆̉̊͗̇́̍͌̊͐̔̈́̊̇͆̄̃̑̕̕͘͘͘͠͝͝͝͠i̴̧̡̢̢̧̢̨̨̧̧̧̛̛͎̗̳̦̘̙͓̦̙͔̜̼̘͇͇̺̭͉̠̩̟̤̥̘͙̤̩͔̪̱̻͈̪̼̼̞̠͎̟̹͕̻̭̤̪̲͕̟̺̻̻͖͕͚̣͇̖̰̝̩͈̤͕͇͕̝͙̙̪͔̗̫͇͎̙̲̲͖̗̘͉̲̣̤͎̔̐̆͒̄̈́̀̎̃̃̅͆̌̈́̽̈́̅̈́̑̄̇͒͐̀̐̀̒̍̀̓͌͗̓̽́͗̓̎͂͛̅̑̔̀͛̈́̽̾̃̊͊͆̄̍͑̍̆̌̾͗̄̊̽̉̅̆̀̎̀͑̿̎̋̄̆̃͐̾̏͛͒̍̋̅͘̕̚̕̕͜͜͝͝͝͝͠ͅͅc̷̛̛͚̝̻̣̞̓́̃́̀̃̓͗͌̂͛́̒̊͑̓͆̇̈́͑̏̆̀͌̑͂͂̄͌̉̔̋́̎͒̿͗͒͛̇͛̿̎̍̕̕̕͝͝͝͝͝ ̴̢̧̢̡̨̢̡̨̡̢̢̛̺̘̹̯̤̩̘̯͔̞̟̬̠̣̟̻̥̜̤͔̥͕̠̥̞͎̗̩̱̮͉͔͎̲̯̱̙̜̥̳̮͔̦̣͖͔̜͉̗̪̳̹̦̤͇̣̙͕̯̫̖̝̼̹͍̠͎͓̗͎̦͓̲̯̱̠̰͇̮̹͔̝͉͙̹̜̹͈̹̥͖̣̳̲͖̓́͌̈́̈́̀͌̄͂̌̾́̍̔̊̓̿͋͂͋̈́̋́́̒̓̀̒̃͂̀͑̐͛̆̆͒̈́̅̿͊͌̍͗̌̌͆̂͌́̉̏̒̓͊̾̒̓̋̽͐̏̾͘̕͜͝͠͝ͅͅr̸̨̢̛̪̞̬͓͔̥̤̣͔̭̥̙͉̦̗̠̳̩͙̂̈́͑͑̿̋̓̀͋͆̋̕͝͝ë̴̢̡̨̬͈͉̖̞͔͎͓͖̼̘̬͕̰͈̥͈̝̩͎͉͉̫̜͚͕̤͔̟̯͓͎̟͙̜̭̩̗̮͎̗̤͇̝̩͎̜̺̯͕͇̝͎̯͙̖͙̮̗̮̘́̑͑͛̂̅̄̌̽̓̒̾̿͆̏̏͐͛̾̂̃͑͆̅̄̿͋̅͂̈́̽͋͒̎͐̒̓͆̌̉͑͊́̀̈̾͛̋͑̋̎̈̀̽̀͊̏͘͝͝͝͝͠͝ͅp̴̧̧̡̢̢̢̛̛̛͚̟͓̖̭̪̻̪̲̬̥̙̥̰̼̹͎͕̪̞̮̺̰̬̘̫̤͉̦͙̮̖̙̹̻͔̖̮̲̞̣̻̜̠͇̬͚̱̦̼̲̮̀̂͌̍̈̒̍̋̌̏͐̓͛̉̂̈̀͑̈́͊͗͋͗́̂̎̎̃͆͒̅̑̇́̈͐̾̀̔̒̉͑͒̅̓̈́̋͋̀̍̄̿̌̀̉͆̇̔̈́͗̋̄̓̇͗̎̉̆͊̒͗̚̕͘͘̕̕̚͜͜͝͝͠͠͠͠͠ͅͅͅơ̶̢̡̧̨̡̛̛͔̦̼̰̠̯̰̟̲̣̜͙̲͙̪̱̱͕̺̪͈͉̺̻̙̥̲̩̲̩͔̠͚̩͓̞̠̯̟̫̣̗̦̰͉͚͙̺͎̼͖̥̙͈̯̲̝̞͎̻͕̮͔̰̖͔̭͙̩̼͔̫̹̘͓͔̜̘͍̍̅̄͋͑̋̍̊̉̄̈̽̈͐̀͌͐̆͊͂̐̋̃̎͆͛̐̀̂̿̈́͂́̈̌͐̇̀̒͋͑͐́͌̐̇̊͆̀͂͋̏́͋͆̏͗͂͑̂̓̽͘͘̚̕̕̕̕̚͘͜͜͠͝͝ͅͅͅr̴̨̨̨̧̨̛̘͕͈͔͙̠̬̯̩̗̰̗̬̦͈̗̝̣͓͓̟͕͙͈̠̘̻͓̭̝̘̦̦͓̭̘͙̻̙̼̩̰̝͈̱̝̱̬͉͙̣̖̮̲͈̙̱̩̣͕̦̰̮͔͈͓̙̮͍̳̟̠̞͎̱̣̰͕̩̝̲̝͐́́̍̈͐͋̐̑̌͋̓̈́̈͗̿̈̈́͗̑̚͜͜͜͜͜͝ͅͅţ̴̢̨̧͇͉͎̣̬̣̝̗̬̹͇̮̞̈́̐̌̇̈́̌͊̐̅̂̌̂͒͌́̈͌̂̊͗̍̿͑͋̎̓͂̀̎̎͒̾̏̒͌̃̄͋̌̾̍̈́̐̏͑̊̍͑͆̉̓́̆̌̾̓͊̊̈̑͘̚̕͘͘̕͝͝͝͝͝s̴̢̢̡̛̬̹͚̻͉̦̦̣̦̠̜͕̤̳͓͙̟̬͕̘̦̿͗̉̏̒͆̓̄͊͌͛͂͑̒̃͛͘͜͝͝!

Shared elements with supernatural that you might Vibe with: Honestly, probably bc Nightvale and Alice are by the Same Dudes, a lot of these points are the same as Alice Isn’t Dead, but it’s less scawy and more funney. Also hits the “horror, but make it kind of a sitcom” vibes. Doesn’t have the same road trip vibes, but DOES capture the exact weirdness of South Western USA, so I’m still giving it “fucked up americana” credit. If you’ve never been to New Mexico ur like this is an exaggeration clearly no desert town is subject to like ACTUAL cosmic horror and unexplainable sights but I’m telling you New Mexico is just Like That. (I highly recommend visiting the land of enchantment if you ever get the oppurtunity it is a deeply odd and wonderfully unsettling experience.) Look man it’s gay it’s a horror comedy cecil has a wonderfully soothing voice and it hates capitalism so fucking much like oh my god so much what more could you want.

MINI REC ALERT: Wolf 359! I have nothing deep to say about this I just like it and my gut tells me that y’all would enjoy it too I know there isnt much for physical descriptions in the show but I know in my heart that the main character is so so pretty and so so stupid. I KNOW yall like some himbos that experience character growth.

Okay since It’s my party and I’ll speak if I want to rapid fire list of podcasts I just like and want more people to listen to even though I’m behind on like all of them shhhhh: The Penumbra Podcast, BomBARDed, Dungeons and Daddies, Stellar Firma, Wonderful!

SONG RECS

okay these aren’t like replacement recs or anything they’re just really good and I almost certainly would have put them on some sort of supernatural playlist in 2013 but I don’t, like, have a good playlist for them now so I’m subjecting y’all to them also they all have the youtube link for ease of access

Woah There Kimmy-  Felix Hagan & the Family

Devil’s Backbone- The Civil Wars

Blood On My Name- The Brothers Bright

Awake O Sleeper- The Brothers Bright

The Bottom of the River- Delta Rae

Old Number 7- The Devil Makes Three

The Bullet- The Devil Makes Three

In Hell I’ll Be In Good Company- The Dead South

Bartholomew- The Silent Comedy

Pomegranate Seeds- Julian Moon

Curses- The Crane Wives

Tongues & Teeth -The Crane Wives

OKAY THAT’S IT! THAT’S ALL FOLKS! FUCK!

[readbythestarlight]

HAPPY GOOD OMENS DAY

Title: What pairs better with me than you? Fandom: Good Omens Pairing: Aziraphale/Crowley Summary: A sort of alternate ending/continuation of the Good Omens Lockdown short. Crowley says goodnight and hangs up, but Aziraphale finds he can't just leave it at that. Disclaimer: author knows nothing about wine pairings

cross-posted to my Ao3 (not linking here because tumblr sucks, but you can find a link to my ao3 on my blog or else look me up: emiwankenobi.)

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“…You know, I could hunker down at your place. Slither over and watch you eat cake. I could bring a bottle, a case of something drinkable?”

Aziraphale frowns, and habit brings denial to his lips before he can even think of a different reply. “No, I—I—I’m afraid that would be breaking the rules. Out of the question!” A deep breath. “I’ll see you when this is over.”

A half second of quiet before the reply comes. “Right.” Aziraphale frowns, hang on, that’s not right. “Yeah... I’m setting the alarm for July. Goodnight, Angel.”

“Hang on, Crowley,” Aziraphale begins, but the line has already clicked dead in his ear, the call disconnected before he can say anything else. He stares at the phone for a moment before slowly returning the receiver to its cradle, disappointment settling heavy in his chest. Now what on earth was that all about? Had he said the wrong thing? Crowley had certainly sounded unhappy. And for him to simply hang up like that, that wasn’t like him at all.

“I wonder what’s gotten into him,” Aziraphale muses, allowing his worry to flow from his voice into the very, very empty air of his shop.

“I’m sure he’s alright,” he added, pausing again, but of course nothing answered back. His cakes and his books were all entirely non-interested in the subject, it would seem. Aziraphale fretted.

“He needn’t have hung up like that. And really, that isn’t how it’s supposed to work,” he went on objecting aloud. He had thought—well, that had always been the way it had worked before; he would say oh no and oh dear and we couldn’t possibly—

And Crowley would counter with what if and why not and come on, Angel, and no one will know. And then, whatever it was, they would. Dinner, a concert, raising the supposed antichrist with the goal of avoiding Armageddon. At the start of every proposition he would say no, and Crowley would say but why not yes, and it was simple as that. It was a game they’d played almost since the very beginning.

But not this time, apparently, and Aziraphale can’t quite put a name to the feeling that settles in his chest at the thought. Can’t quite help but wonder why not this time.

“What has gotten into him?” he once again asks his empty shop, and once again he receives no answer. Admittedly he is rather lonely here, with no one coming and going. Even those pesky would-be thieves had been almost pleasant company after days all by himself.

“He won’t really sleep until July, will he?” he wonders aloud, and experiences a sinking feeling of certainty which he doesn’t like at all. “Oh dear.”

Without really realizing he had come to some sort of decision Aziraphale dials the only number he knows by heart for the second time this morning, his ancient phone connecting. He does not fidget with the cord while the line rings one, twice—

“What?”

The greeting is much the same as the first time he called, sharp and annoyed, and Aziraphale realizes much too late that he hasn’t actually decided what he wanted to say.

“Ah, Crowley? It’s me—sorry, yes, you know that. Um—I—you see—yes.” A painful half second’s pause. “Hello again.”

Across the line he hears a sigh, and can easily imagine Crowley pinching the bridge of his nose as if warding off a headache. “Something you forgot to say, Angel?” he asks, sounding just on the edge of his patience. Aziraphale knows he needs to say something, and quickly.

“Yes, actually. Um. I forgot to mention,” he begins, stalling for time. He looks around the room for inspiration and finds it in the half eaten remains of the schwarzwälder kirschtorte. “Wine.”

“Wine.” Crowley echoes, impatience now mixing with bewilderment.

“Yes,” Aziraphale says again. “Yes, wine. You see I made a lovely schwarzwälder kirschtorte, I think I mentioned it?”

“You had to miracle the cherries, yeah,” Crowley confirms. “What’s that got to do with wine? Or me?”

“Oh, well, you see, I’m afraid that I’m running rather low on a good wine to—to pair with a few of my desserts,” Aziraphale said, absolutely refusing to acknowledge how utterly ridiculous he must sound just then. “Specifically something that pairs well with chocolate, and…”

Silence descends as he trails off, the kind filled with static from his ancient phone line and absolutely nothing else. It goes on for long enough that Aziraphale begins to wonder if maybe they’ve been disconnected—or worse, that Crowley has hung up on him again. He fidgets as he says, “Crowley?”

A stirring breaks the silence. “Yeah. Yeah, Angel, I’m here.”

“Ah,” Aziraphale answers, and presses on before silence can fall again and make things even more awkward. “Then, I, um… I don’t suppose you know where I would be able to get some. Wine. That would pair well with the kirschtorte.” He clears his throat. “ A nice pinot noir, perhaps a whole case?”

The sound of movement crackles through again. “I’m fresh out of pinot noir, I’m afraid,” Crowley says, and Aziraphale feels fresh disappointment beginning to creep in, alongside embarrassment.

“Oh, I see,” he begins. “Well—”

“I’ve got some port though,” Crowley interrupts. “A whole case, even. That pairs with cherries and chocolate well enough, don’t you think?”

Had Crowley told him he’d gotten his hands on a second copy of The Nice and Accurate Prophecies Aziraphale could hardly have been more pleased. It’s only ages of practice that allows him to reply with any semblance of being calm, and even then glee slips through that he can’t hide. “Oh, oh yes, I believe a port would do very nicely.”

“Good,” Crowley says, and “Great. I’ll just, er, pack up a few bottles and pop over, shall I?”

He sounds uncertain, and small wonder really, Aziraphale thinks, considering that very same proposal had been dashed down by himself not ten minutes before. Only here it is again, Crowley reaching out and leaving it for Aziraphale to decide. Just like always. Probably waiting for Aziraphale to hem and haw and come up with a reason why they shouldn’t.

Not anymore, he thinks, determined, lips pressed in a thin line as if to hold back the old habits of objection. Certainly not today.

“Aziraphale?” Crowley asks, after too much quiet. Doubt has crept into his voice, doubt and resignation. He thinks he knows what’s coming, and it’s that which finally spurs Aziraphale into saying what he knows he ought to have done long, long before now.

“Yes,” he says, with a deep breath and six thousand years of tenderness creeping into his tone. “Yes, please. I’d like that very much.”

[critgemhero]

An almost universally accepted headcanon in the Good Omens fandom that I don't quite personally believe in is the idea that Crowley purposefully made his feelings known to Aziraphale for 6000 years, and that he wished Aziraphale would finally notice his flirting with him after all that time.

I just think he couldn't contain how absolutely smitten and fascinated he was with Aziraphale, and that he didn't quite understand his own feelings for the angel himself. He never really wanted to to put a label on whatever they were, because that means he would have to think about those feelings. Sure, they had ‘The Arrangement’, but I think that was his unconscious way of finding a reason to see Aziraphale. ‘The Arrangement’ was about their Heaven & Hell duties, not them personally. It was an excuse to see him more often. His sudden flash of anger at the label 'fraternizing' used by Aziraphale in 1862 stood out to me. Maybe that was when he realized a label could be used for them, and he wanted a better one. It scared him, pissed him off, and led to that big fight and 80 year long sleep. That won’t be the first time you see him get openly furious when he’s scared, which I’ll bring up again later. It was in 1967, however, when everything changed. When Aziraphale gave him the holy water.

I think this was the moment Crowley realized just how much he loved Aziraphale and wanted to be with him, only because that’s when he realized there was a decent chance Aziraphale felt the same way back. The music is noticeably romantic here too, which only happened in the previous scene where Aziraphale had his big realization of some sorts with Crowley saving his books. I think a barrier was broken between them in this exchange, Crowley speaks so softly and openly here it makes my heart ache. Even Aziraphale sees Crowley’s heartbreak when he doesn't take up his offer on a ride.The rest of this dialogue had so much more obvious raw meaning behind it, and I think they both knew that. “I’ll take you anywhere you want to go” I mean come on...

After Aziraphale says he goes to fast for him, Crowley slows down and doesn't address it again. He goes back to how things were before, that is until the Gazebo scene where tensions are high and he explodes from his pent up feelings. Remember when I said he gets angry when he’s scared? He is so enraged when that scene starts, but then his voice suddenly gets soft when he says they can go off together. He isn't scared when he thinks about that, he’s more confident about that than anything. It’s the moment Aziraphale says they’re on opposite sides that makes him enraged again, angrily saying “We’re on our side!” because the world is ending and all they have left is each other. 

All Crowley ever had was Aziraphale and humanity, and humanity was doomed. Both of the infamous break-up scenes (the sidewalk one too) felt to me like he was screaming "You know how I feel about you, don't you? Do I really need to say it? You feel the same way, don’t you? You said we’d go on a picnic one day, well now’s that day! Please don’t deny it, come with me!"

I believe it was the time they spent together after getting on the bus but before swapping bodies where their true feelings were finally addressed in a conversation. Just before they get on the bus, Crowley is speaking in that exact same soft tone that he had when they were in his Bentley in 1967 and when he said they could go off together to the stars.

That's my personal headcanon! I love how there are so many places in the show where you can choose where you think they realized their own feelings for the other and when they knew the other felt the same way back, but this is my own personal take on it. I don’t think it was ever as simple as coyly and purposefully one way flirting for Crowley. He’s way too intense, open, and attention hungry for that. The purposeful coyness is more up Aziraphale’s alley, but that’s a whole different essay.

[escriveine]

Good Omens Author and Artist Recs

In honor of the tenth month, here are 10 Authors & Artists in the Good Omens fandom who are absolutely giving me joy and life right now. They each have published multiple pieces, and the intended audiences of these works range from general to mature-but-non-explicit to mature-and-quite-explicit.

The stories I most favor — including these recommendations — have happy endings, though not necessarily all works in the portfolios of the authors/artists will, so do read the tags and such for yourself.

(NB: The lists are alphabetical by username; it was hard enough selecting only 5 of each, don't ask me to rank them.)

Authors

ARK | @et-in-arkadia | AO3 Good Omens top-level: Ark

Start with the fic that pulse of my nights and days, a gorgeous, explicit romp that revels in revelations of pining, and love, and literary recitations.The way Aziraphale and Crowley gradually reveal themselves in confessions more naked than their bodies, in their desire to please one another in ways that augment, but are not strictly subject to, the sensual pleasure of the flesh is deeply engaging and soul-satisfying.

If you'd rather plunge into the fic that seared me with Aziraphale and Crowley's adjacent yet solitary pining, splintered me with mutually-recognized reciprocal angst (and Someone have mercy that I know that's a thing now), and finally made me actually cry when all hearts were mended (even mine), try this: these furious passions, these chances. It’s an exquisite agony and fierce, cathartic joy; a true paean to love and desire.

DRAWLIGHT | @drawlight | AO3 Good Omens top-level: drawlight

Start with the series Chiaroscuro, a kaleidoscope array of myth and legend and stories from time out of mind lived by two who would be lovers, would be loved, did they but know it. The tales take us from memory and starstuff, through living and revelations, to futures and syncretism; all of it suffused with light, light, light.

If Crowley's fears hurt, it is because I have held them, sliver-sharp and lying inside my own heart; when Crowley's rapture resounds, it is because each of us secretly knows the sound of blessed water falling on the desert — the echoes of love are built into our very fabric, waiting to reverberate. drawlight takes us through the moments, the tesserae of many colors with an intimate eye for hope, then shows us how the jangled tumble resolves into utter delight. It ends (though their story never really ends) as it begins (where all stories really begin) — in the stars.

FYRE | @amuseoffyre | AO3 Good Omens top-level: Fyre

Start with the series Crossing Paths, a sprawling, currently-41-chapter saunter Through the Ages with Aziraphale and Crowley. Each morsel of backstory is canon-compliant and richly evocative of its particular era, laced with enough detail to make this fellow history nerd’s heart soar (seriously, there are even endnotes giving specific context to the setting and pivotal flow of events).

But these are no dry ostraca, no cryptic, lifeless castoffs; these stories fairly shudder with the countervailing magnificence and wretchedness wrought by humans, each extreme alternately and seemingly arbitrarily condoned by Heaven and Hell. And this crucible of life on Earth refines something unexpected in the natures of both Aziraphale and Crowley — a tiny mustard seed of compassion that may have been intrinsic to their natures, but would never have come to fruition without being deliberately nurtured, sheltered, encouraged. It is something the other angels dismiss, and the other demons forswear. But over and over it draws these two incarnate immortals together, and the adversity that could have seared the heart right out of them instead makes them kind. And every bit of is in character. These stories made me cry and laugh and quail and hope and long for ever, ever more.

JESS THE RECKLESS | Twitter JessWhitecroft | AO3 Good Omens top-level: jessthereckless

Start with the series It's Not The End Of The World, Dear, a light-hearted romance exploring what happens when an ethereal and an occult being come together and have to navigate the supernatural repercussions of their involvement. The opening story picks up where canon left us, in a world saved and remade and spinning on. Aziraphale and Crowley work through what it means to be on their own side the way they do everything else, with snarky bickering and displacement activities and gravitating toward each other like two celestial bodies on close approach.

That delightful domestic fluff, with all its attendant joys and frustrations, gives us the opportunity to fall in love again with our pair of ineffable idiots even as they realize they’ve fallen in love with each other. There are picnics and portents, kisses and divine ecstasy, seduction and human pleasure. And so much outright hedonism, sexual exploration, and joyful fucking it feels positively sybaritic. Yet that’s not the end-all be-all here. Life is infinitely more interesting together, even as they tackle kitchen renovations and making dinner and assembling furniture. As Aziraphale quotes, Come live with me and be my love, and we will all the pleasures prove… The series is an ongoing indulgence, with another update posted just today (Oct-3).

LAURA SHAPIRO | @laurashapiro-noreally | AO3 Good Omens top-level: laurashapiro

Start with the series Leaves of Grass and the not-to-be-missed follow-on stories in the same universe: Working Hard in Damp Places and As Time Goes By. This extended series is everything great sex (and stories about great sex) should be — playful, joyful, loving. Daring. Scorching. An utterly delightful mix of banter and banging, pleasure and emotion, exploration and re-discovery with excellent character voices and interactions. It's incredibly fucking sexy and emotionally satisfying.

And lavish attention to detail makes Aziraphale and Crowley shine through as genuinely supernatural beings sharing the joys of their flesh (and all the very human transcendence that can bring). But there’s so much more, too. Laura weaves the most glorious, fulfilled and fulfilling yearning through every part of these works, and it's breath-taking. It's not just the scope of years for these immortal characters, but the depth, the breadth, the texture of their longing that's so amazing. Those first, nearly invisible tendrils first introduced in nearly offhand ways as "they talked, and they argued, and they dined and drank" ineluctably gather and twine into a great ribald ribbons of longing running through the fabric of their relationship — fascinating and inextricable.

Enjoyment of the wicked wordplay and cackle-inducing snark is left as an exercise for the lucky reader.

Artists

DRAWLIGHT | @drawlight | Good Omens Art Collection on AO3: as beautiful to me as lightning

Start with the piece I’m never getting over: and there, where my head pushed backwards (Original Tumblr post) (Full image on AO3)

Shared breath, shared gaze, shared being. Desire and connection flow through every line, thrilling the senses and stirring the soul. We are gorgeously suspended in the moment with them and know, in drawlight’s words, this is only the first time, never the last. I get happily lost in their soft blush of discovery and joy.

The rest of the collection well repays the looking with sweet heat, tender gestures, and the dawnglow of genuine love.

GEMENNAIR | @gemennair | Redbubble Shop: gemennair

Start with the piece I’m never getting over: Forbidden Friendship (Original Tumblr post)

A glimpse of their first picnic, in Eden. There is absolutely luminous joy in every shaft of sunlight, each dappled fruit, every green-gold leaf. And, of course, in the faces of Aziraphale and Crowley. And there are secrets awaiting notice: lily of the valley, first sprung in Eden, a symbol of hope and return to happiness; the possible origin of Aziraphale’s love for pears; Crowley amiably sheltering under the angel’s wing again.

Everything is soft and nothing hurts and I treasure the time I get to spend there.

GINGER HAOLE | @gingerhaole | Tumblr art tag | Good Omens Art Collection on AO3: Polaroids | Etsy Shop: gingerhaole

Start with the piece I’m never getting over: [CW: This kink is not everyone’s cup of tea. You may wish to preview the SFW Tumblr snippet and description first.] Sounding (Original Tumblr post) (Full image on AO3)

Even the SFW snippet gives me a heartrush. The long, accepting lines of Crowley’s body, the way he’s opened himself entirely to the pleasure being given to him, giving over control even to the point of allowing his halo to manifest.

In the full set of Sounding images, the depth of well-worn affection and tenderness between Aziraphale and Crowley, their reciprocally earned and returned trust absolutely shines. Aziraphale’s Botticelli hands fascinate; his intense concentration captivates. The contrast of a fully clothed Aziraphel reverently pleasuring an enthusiastically nude Crowley is beyond delicious. And Crowley’s trembling compliance enchants; his erotic exaltation thrills.

And the various nonbinary, genderfluid representations in the rest of the explicit Polaroids collection feel as genuine as the mindful, existential bond between the ineffable lovers. The same goes for the non-explicit artwork featuring them on Ginger’s Tumblr, too. Exquisite.

JASMINE TWIL | @jasminetwil | Tumblr Good Omens art tag | Etsy Shop: JasmineTwil

Start with the piece I’m never getting over: The first comic adventure of Aardvark!Crowley and Aziraphale (Original Tumblr post)

Playful, snarky, delightful comic-style fanart. There are details that callback to canon (like Crowley’s particular relationship to houseplants and Aziraphale’s tartan bowtie and camelhair coat), and others that exist purely for the joy of them (like Crowley’s demon tattoo appearing on the aardvark’s fur, and the UPC code on the plant pot — seriously, read the last 3 digits…).

Never underestimate the power and worth of laughter.

KHIROPTERA | @khiroptera | Tumblr art tag

Start with the piece I’m never getting over: making sure Crowley has lovely dreams about whatever he likes best (Original Tumblr post)

This is so meltingly soft and tender, I get all misty every time I see it. The deepening crepuscular colors, the scattered twinkles from stars Crowley likely hung himself, the smitten smile curving Aziraphale’s lips, the tender blush of sleep on Crowley’s cheeks give the scene a wonderfully dreamlike quality. I particularly adore this reminder of Aziraphale’s first act of service for Crowley: offering comfort and shelter under the curving expanse of angelic wings. In canon, Crowley’s acts of service tend to be fairly dramatic, increasingly overt gestures impelled by accretion of yearning and dire circumstance, so this homage to Aziraphale’s comparatively understated offerings is particularly sweet.

All the pieces in her portfolio make me squee, every time I revisit them. Truly, every single time. In fact, I was so inspired by her adorable Ineffable Husbands in scarves in the snow (Original Tumblr post), I ended up writing a vignette of ineffable fluff about it.

Postscript to the authors and artists mentioned here: If you would rather I present different links or other information, or if I have in any way mischaracterized your work, please tell me, so I can make corrections. While my words come from a place of love, it would be no kindness for me to gloss over mistakes or cause any of you discomfort. Thank you all. ♥

[p1nkwitch]

16. 17. and 21. for writer meta ask! Always love to hear you talking about fics you wrote / are writing / will write!

16- Tried anything new with your writing lately? (style, POV, genre, fandom?)

Mm, i would say the style in a couple of fics of mine were a little bit different, i wanted to try to change the way i usually narrate or explain stuff. The main examples are And the Nightmare Collapses, because I wanted to do something a little more strange and play with the reality breaking aspects. I just love eldritch stuff, plus the entire part of the Lukas being a collective mind struggling to find personhood was delightful.

I would love to do it more in the future. I just have fun sprinkling in that sort of stuff.

Beating heart of the institution is also a very good example of that. The way I chose to tell it was meant to be different due to who the narrator was, its… the sort of weird and strange narration that reminds me of a hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy or good omens. Something about the voice who tells the story being a little bit odd and going into tangents. It was fun, I struggled a little bit until I realized that I could make several pov changes to open up more possibilities regarding what the story could say.

So i'm very fond of how it turned out, despite everything.

Finally A mother’s love is also like that in the sense that i had to construct the story based on the letter and Elias reactions towards reading them. To have a bunch of seemingly unrelated events all connect into the final one and the revelation at the end. The letters and statements were the moving force, while everything else was a little window into his life. I greatly enjoyed that, and wish to do it more. Will need to see how I can implement it later on.

As for future uses, im not sure yet, like i said i would love to use some of those aspects again, but i would need to pick a plot that i feels goes well with it. Which is somewhat difficult if I want it to fit within canon as a little of an offshoot alteration.

Maybe i would love to go into more horror or the cosmic aspects of the fears, which is funny considering the fandom im writting for, but Peter and Elias are far too blase about murder and spooky shit for the horror to settle.

Its why i need to go into au territory to be able to use it best.

Oh perhaps errr, I'm trying to write smut? It is technically a genre change, im vibing with several ideas and maybe a few sequels for things i already made. But i'm not sure about it. There are a few that I do not believe will ever see the light of day even if i finish them, i'm too embarrassed for it.

17- Do you think readers perceive your work - or you - differently to you? What do you think would surprise your readers about your writing or your motivations?

I… don't know? I mean it is hard to really know someone just by their writing and i try to be honest most of the time about how I am. At most I guess people would think I'm very sure of what I write? But half of the time I spend it thinking i suck. I like what I make and put love and effort into it, but I do end up feeling like its not really as good as I think. I'm still surprised that people like my stories to be honest.

My motivations are rather simple, i have an idea i like and i just make it, its not that complicated. To be fair i would love to see what someone who has only read my fics and hasn't interacted with me thinks, because who do you think i am based only on my fics its a very interesting point. But yeah, I guess that maybe they think i know what i'm doing but i'm just there trying my best to not overthink myself into feeling bad, i swear im not usually so much of a downer, but it does get me from time to time. Still is it as i tell my close ones, i keep my feelings inside and one day i die!

21- What other medium do you think your story would work well as? (film, webcomic, animated series?)

Maybe… maybe a webcomic? Depends on the story to be honest. But most could do with that media. But i guess if i have to pick from the longer ones-

Once upon a time could be an animated series, since it is mostly hijinks, fluff and angst. The fantasy aspects would be lovely to see animated.

Heart Machinations i believe a webcomic could do, it would be a nice way to show the space backgrounds or the facility.

Beach afterlife reunion party would also work as a webcomic, i have very vivid ideas of the places i described for it, but i am unfortunately terrible at drawing backgrounds. Which is a shame, because i would love to be able to see some of the things i wrote as an illustration. Particularly chapter 2 would be a black and white thing, with the ink seeping and the empty beach. It only gains color at the end when Jonah remembers Peter….

[moveslikebucky]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Good Omens (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens), Mr Cortese/Mr Harrison (Good Omens) Characters: Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley (Good Omens) Additional Tags: Ineffable Tutors (Good Omens), Hurt/Comfort, First Kiss, Touch-Starved, Aziraphale Loves Crowley (Good Omens), Crowley Loves Aziraphale (Good Omens)

Hello friends I am back at it again with the tutors - this time just a little soft hurt/comfort.  Full fic is under the cut, but can also be read on AO3 at the link!  Special thanks to the wonderful @writingelizabeth for the beta read <3 

---

If it had been any other day, Aziraphale could have ignored it. Could’ve thought of it as a trick of the light or a flight of fancy. Could’ve left well enough alone and not let his mind latch on to what he thought he saw.

Aziraphale is well-practiced at this; at making excuses for things. At not reading into the way yellow eyes linger a bit too long, on the meaning behind favors and gifts. He decidedly does not get caught up in the fleeting touch of long spindly fingers to his short and stout ones over a passed bottle of wine. Well, maybe just a little bit. Lets himself think of it in the wee hours of the night when no one is around to notice.

But the clock is ticking and the world keeps spinning, and nothing in all of creation is slowing it down. The End (capital E) is coming, all rather soon now; and Crowley, for whatever reason, is wearing tartan socks today.

They aren’t just any tartan, they’re Aziraphale’s tartan. And all the pomp and rules and meanings behind it. He’d often wondered, in the back of his mind, if Crowley had understood. They had been there when the tartans of the old clans were first made; when they were first passed down. They knew the rituals, the familial bonds required. The seriousness of the gift of tartan.

And one night in 1967, in an intricate ritual of his own devising, Aziraphale had passed Crowley a thermos of holy water, printed with his own tartan. He had hoped Crowley understood the significance, understood that this was Aziraphale reaching out in more ways than one. That he meant everything he said about “someday”, that he wanted Crowley safe, and, under all that with a beige pattern on a tin thermos, that he wanted Crowley by his side, under his mantle.

And today Crowley had worn tartan socks. Aziraphale had noticed as he watched Crowley teaching Warlock maths (Crowley had always been regrettably good at maths; Warlock was shaping up to be much the same). Crowley had deigned to perch on top of the desk in the library they were using as a one-student classroom, crossing one leg up over his bony knee. The cuff of his trousers had ridden up just enough that the pattern was evident. A tiny peek of beige and tan crosshatch, unmistakable to Aziraphale, who’s been wearing that pattern for centuries. He’d spent the majority of his own lesson distracted by the thought of bony ankles, and the majority of the ride in the Bentley back to the shop distracted by further thoughts. Ones that involved interlaced fingers and gentle brushes of lips; thoughts he wasn’t allowed to entertain.

“Well, this is you,” Crowley says matter of factly when they pull up outside the old bookshop. Aziraphale finds he’s not really ready for the day to end, and he could use a drink.

“Would you like to come in, dear? Maybe go over next week’s lesson plans, possibly over a nice bottle of Château Latour?”

“Twist my arm, why don’t you?” Crowley says with a grin as he shuts off the engine, the both of them clambering out of the car to head inside. Aziraphale fumbles with his keys as Crowley drones on about how Warlock is doing in his schoolwork.

“Boy’s a natural, angel! Absolutely a wizard at algebra, who would have thought it?” Crowley says as they enter the shop, candles popping to life of their own accord and blinds drawing themselves. Far too late in the evening to be opening anyway.

“Quite a whiz at numbers, yes. By far his favorite subject.” Aziraphale heads to the back storage as Crowley makes himself comfortable, plopping himself down on the old Chesterfield that’s as much his as anything else in the world at this point. Like he belongs there; like it’s home. Aziraphale takes a moment in the wine storage. Just a bit, just to breathe. It would be unfair, now, to act on these feelings. There are only a few short years left until they learn if their methods have been successful.

It would be cruel, Aziraphale thinks, to give in now. To let the emotions and feelings and yearning finally overtake him, drag him into the undertow and pull him out to sea. He knows, of course, has known with great clarity since 1941 that Crowley loves him. Has known with an agonizing heartache of his own love since 1862. It had snuck up on him, wormed its way into his heart as a seed way back in the Garden. Blooming bright and brilliant on one of the worst days of his life.

No, none of that now. There isn’t enough time. He wipes away the scant few tears that have decided to track down his face, breathes in deeply, and grabs the wine, determined to, at the very least, have a nice evening in.

Crowley is still chattering from across the shop, going on about something to do with Atila the Hun’s grandmother. Aziraphale can hear the pride in Crowley’s voice, still amazed at how much he’s taken to his disguises. Ashtoreth was much softer than Crowley would like to admit, a caregiver and a nurturer. And now, as Mr. Harrison, Crowley is able to impart knowledge. One would think, with Aziraphale being the bookshop owner, that he would take to teaching much more readily than the demon. But, one would be wrong.

Crowley has spent his entire existence asking questions. Sometimes the wrong ones, and sometimes the right ones. But it is in his nature, down to the very core of him to be inquisitive, to wonder, and to learn. Is it any wonder he takes so readily to gifting that knowledge out?

He did give humanity the knowledge of good and evil, after all.

“What was that about Gandhi, dear?” Aziraphale asks as he rounds the corner. “I didn’t quite catch —“

Aziraphale is struck speechless, much to his chagrin. Crowley’s tweed jacket has been discarded over a nearby chair, and his trademark boneless sprawl is nothing new. But his feet are propped on the edge of the couch; and right there, wrapped around his ankles, is unmistakably and unequivocally his tartan.

“Didn’t quite catch what?” Crowley asks. Aziraphale locks eyes with him slowly, not sure what to say. Crowley, for his part, looks confused. He follows to where Aziraphale’s eyes had been, sees the cuff of his trousers has crept up just a tad. Aziraphale watches the realization dawn on those long-loved features. Watches the slow turn of Crowley’s eyes back to him.

“You’re wearing my tartan…”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Why not?”

“And…how long?”

“Don’t ask me that, angel—“

“How long?” It’s more forceful the second time, just a bit of heavenly presence behind it. Enough to make Crowley sit up and take notice, swinging his feet to the floor and tapping his heels nervously. Aziraphale isn’t sure Crowley even understands what he’s asking; not sure that he knows either. It’s not some big cosmic secret; they both know. They don’t speak about it, don’t observe it closely. Keep your distance and keep him safe; the mantra that plays in Aziraphale’s head, late at night when the shop is quiet and his only company is the old and dusty books.

Crowley avoids his eyes, wrings his hands together as he stares at the floor. The air between them is thick and heavy, though with what, Aziraphale isn’t sure yet. Crowley’s mouth opens and closes wordlessly; Aziraphale balls his hands into fists at his sides. Well-manicured nails digging into his palms, grounding him into the moment. Crowley scratches his beard, runs that same hand up through his hair before sighing heavily.

“Don’t remember a time when I didn’t.” He finally says, his voice cracking, his eyes finally meeting Aziraphale’s.

The moment stretches between them, thick like treacle. Aziraphale can’t give in now; not when they have so much to lose, not when what’s at stake is everything. What would it gain them if they fail? A few happy years and a bit of distraction before their weapons are at each other’s throats? Just two unwilling soldiers on either side of a war they didn’t want, on the battlefield that was once their home.

But then, what if? What if, in this short stretch of time before everything potentially goes to Hell (literally), they could lean on each other? It wouldn’t be much, but it would be theirs. But what’s the point if it could be painful later?

Before Aziraphale can break his thoughts to respond, Crowley stands and crosses over to him, takes the wine bottle from his shaking grip, and sets it aside.

“Look, angel, we can forget this. I’ll go back to my flat, we’ll call it a night - pretend this conversation didn’t happen.”

Crowley is standing so close to him, less than a foot away even though it feels like miles and Aziraphale doesn’t want him to go, doesn’t want to forget about this. He doesn’t want to run anymore and he realizes, with solid clarity and conviction, that the reason for anything — the reason they should stop running and be happy now — is precisely because things could be painful later.

“Don’t!” Aziraphale reaches out and grabs Crowley’s sleeve as he turns away, freezing the both of them in the moment. Amber eyes meet his, searching for answers that Aziraphale doesn’t have. He’s on the wrong foot, out of his element with no idea where to go next. There isn’t a precedence for any of this, there never has been. Not for an angel’s love —singular, not plural— pent up for centuries with nowhere to go. An angel’s love is meant to be all-encompassing, of everything that exists in all of the world, not like this. Not with a single focus point. Not with only one star pulling that love into an orbit that is nigh inescapable.

What even happens now? Aziraphale doesn’t know. But he lets his instincts take over, lets this far too human need that has consumed him since a cold and dreary day in a park in 1862 take the lead. Lets the sense of dread melt away from him, lets it be replaced by anticipation instead as he threads his fingers through Crowley’s. They fit together perfectly and his heart jumps into his throat.

“Aziraphale…” His name in Crowley’s mouth is a question, one that Crowley has been asking for longer than Aziraphale has ever wanted to admit.

“Don’t go, please, I…” Aziraphale’s words fail him. How does one say something that has been left unsaid for so long? How does one give voice to that? Tears sting at the corner of his eyes as he grips Crowley’s hand tighter.

There’s the soft caress of a thumb on his cheek, lightly brushing away those tears. A calming voice whispering comfort as he’s pulled into arms that are so familiar to him in every way except for this . They’ve never held hands before, never held one another like this, and yet it feels so right and so familiar. It feels like coming home.

Crowley holds him close, lets him cry; stays steadfast as Aziraphale crumbles, rubbing circles into his back. Comforting him, of all things. Shakily, Aziraphale wraps his arms around Crowley’s thin frame, finally knowing what it’s like to have the one he loves most in his arms. It starts his tears falling anew, knowing that he’ll never be able to go back. They’ve crossed a line, and neither of them can turn away from it any longer.

“S’alright, angel,” Crowley whispers softly on a cracked voice, “S’gonna be alright.” It’s only now that Aziraphale realizes Crowley is crying, too. He squeezes the demon tighter, nuzzles his face into his neck, marveling at how Crowley’s sharp angels compliment his own soft curves. How they fit together like two pieces of the same puzzle, two halves of one soul, like the old philosophers used to say.

They stay like this, for hours or minutes Aziraphale can’t say. All he can do is stand here, breathing in the faint hint of brimstone that lingers on Crowley’s skin, feeling the rise and fall of Crowley’s breathing. He’s never been held like this, never held anyone like this. He’s seen the humans do it, of course. Watched Adam wrap his arms around Eve to offer comfort in the unyielding wilderness, watched as Yeshua’s mother wept openly in Mary Magdalene’s arms. All through the millennia, he’s watched as humans have touched each other, have been vulnerable with each other in the hope of just some simple comfort in life. It’s different for them, when life is so fleeting and so short. Where love is not just something to want, it’s something needed from the moment they are born until the last breath that they take. When time is so short, so ephemeral, it’s impossible to face it alone.

Time has never been short or fleeting, not for him or for Crowley. The wide expanse of forever has always stretched out in front of them, just as the wide expanse of before stretches behind. Both of them older than the universe itself, architects in the crew of God’s creation. When you cannot truly be killed by mortal means, it’s easy to forget that an end is planned. There’s all the time in the world. Wait for me, go a little slower, we’ll get there.

There is no time now, four years at best if their plan doesn’t work, and Aziraphale can feel the crushing weight of mortality now. He wonders how the humans have ever survived underneath it.

But for now, there are thin fingers carding through Aziraphale’s pale curls, whispering words of comfort. There’s a warm hand on the small of his back, tracing circles with a thumb. The gentleness and softness of the actions make his chest hurt and he wonders if this is what the humans call “heartbreak”. He pulls back reluctantly, needing to see Crowley’s face, needing to read the emotions there.

He swipes a calloused thumb across Crowley’s cheek, collecting a stray tear that’s lingering there. Just this once, just for now, he lets himself get lost in Crowley’s eyes. Yellow like molten gold, glowing in the relative darkness, brighter than the candles. Aziraphale lets his hand rest on Crowley’s cheek, taking in the surprising softness of the beard he’s been sporting these last few months. Crowley leans into it, eyes searching Aziraphale’s own as he turns slowly —every so slowly—and places a soft kiss to Aziraphale’s palm.

Nothing has ever felt like this, so simple and gentle of a gesture, and yet the maelstrom it causes within Aziraphale could destroy an entire coastal city if he let it. This flood of love and acceptance and belonging, this overwhelming feeling of yes, you, you are the one I should be running to, that I should be going through this life with. It’s always been you how could I have ever pushed you away?

And so Aziraphale doesn’t push him away; resolves to never do so again. Instead, he lets his hand drift along Crowley’s jawline, around to the back of his head. Lets his fingers finally, after so long spent wondering, learn just how soft Crowley’s hair is. He pulls, Crowley comes willingly to meet him halfway, and for the first time in six thousand years, Aziraphale kisses him.

It’s almost anticlimactic in its simplicity. A gentle brush of lips, an intimate touch reserved for humans and not for them. The heavens don’t shake, lightning doesn’t strike them down, God herself does not descend in a glorious cacophony of trumpets to cast him into the pit. It’s just him and Crowley, standing in the bookshop, with their lips and hearts and souls pressed to one another. Content and calm in this human-bound method of affection, this gentleness.

They break apart slowly, as if moving through a fog. Aziraphale lets his eyes fall open, sees Crowley’s still closed, a small and quiet smile quirking up the corners of his lips. It’s unbearably tender, and Aziraphale wants nothing more than to hold him until the sun burns out. Crowley opens his eyes slowly, meets Aziraphale’s gaze. The small and quiet smile spreads, breaking across his face like dawn light.

“I do hope that was alright, my dear,” Aziraphale whispers into the fading darkness of the room, afraid to speak too loudly, to break this spell that’s between them right now. Crowley still holds him tight, like he’s something precious or worthy.

“Angel, I…” Crowley’s voice trails off, no longer more than a string of consonants with no vowels to hold them together. Like too many things are trying to rush out of his mouth at the same time and none of them make sense. Aziraphale just waits, lets Crowley hold him, lets him find his words until he finally lands on three.

Three words, spoken softly and nervously on shaky breath. Spoken in such a way that hints a gearing for rejection; at waiting for the penny to drop. At an expectation of once again being let down, of being too much.

Aziraphale smiles at him, tangles his fingers through Crowley’s hair, feeling the short strands slide smoothly through them. He says three words back. Crowley leans in, and their lips meet again. More insistent this time, more sure of themselves. It feels right, kissing Crowley. Feels like they were meant to fit together this way, like his lips have been waiting countless lifetimes to know the shape of Crowley’s lips.

There will be time for talk later, time for confessions and promises. For apologies and what-ifs. But for now, they sink to the sofa, wrapped in each other’s arms, and just for a moment in time, they are able to hold one another. To forget about what’s coming and just exist and touch and kiss each other softly like the humans do.