#my girl ate everyone up with this quote

[gwyns]

“Shall I tend to my little garden forever? You can’t have it both ways. You cannot resent my decision to lead a small, quiet life while also refusing to let me do anything greater.”

[drak3n]

THE NEMESIS

ꨄ. SYNOPSIS: love and hate are so close to each other for a reason.

ꨄ. CONTENT WARNINGS: slow burn, angst, hurt/comfort, friends to strangers to lovers, neglectful parents, love triangles, high school drama, fights, swift mention of a bloody & bruised nose, reader was a misunderstood bully, makeup sex, breeding kink, unprotected sex

ꨄ. SENA'S NOTE: sorry for my inactivity y'all, a lot has been happening lately. anyways, this is over 5k words long so enjoy!

bold italic quotes = letter excerpts

PROLOGUE. | SERIES MASTERLIST.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ♡•°`.

“it’s embarrassing to admit this, really. after all this time we’ve been apart from each other.”

atsumu and you didn’t always hate each other.

truthfully, you had started off getting along really well, even better than you’d gotten along with osamu. it was something no one could explain, until it all fell apart.

your story went all the way back to your second year of middle school, where the miyas had to move due to the twins’ mother having found a job on the other side of the prefecture. that meant the twins had to transfer schools as well.

it wasn’t like either of the two had difficulties at adapting to their new environments, given that they were quite popular because of their athleticism and their looks. even at their new school, their talent for volleyball made them climb up the ladder of fame in no time.

this is where you came in. a mean, popular girl who had no qualms about making other kids feel worse about themselves. everyone was careful not to cross paths with you or get on your bad side, afraid of your wrath.

the twins had been warned about your presence that lingered like a devil on the school grounds. “she hates boys who are loud and eccentric,” a classmate had told the two, and the younger twin shot a pointed look at the older, which made him glare back at him.

“the hell are ya starin’ at me for, samu!?”

“nothin’.”

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ♡•°`.

“you were the first person to approach me, although you knew what others thought of me. we were kids back then, but i haven’t forgotten.”

it was both a blessing and a curse to be avoided by everyone. you had your peace and no one was there to mess with you, but at times, it was really boring.

lunch breaks had to be the worst. if you ate your lunch at the hall, everyone would avoid you like the pest. you’d have a table that ten students could use, for yourself.

it was cold outside today, but you still sat on the bench in the yard, ignoring your growling stomach. your mother hadn’t been packing you lunch in a while, and you couldn’t find anything to shove into your bag last minute in the morning.

counting the coins you found in the pockets of your thin coat, you determined with a frown that it was nowhere near enough to buy even a cereal bar.

you could just bully some of the juniors into giving you money or their lunch. before you could stand up and march towards an innocent group of schoolkids playing tag on the other side of the yard, someone sat next to you.

your eyes narrowed at the sight of one of the new kids. you had no idea which of the two it was, given that you couldn’t distinguish a difference between them, and frankly, you didn’t really care. neither of the two shared a class with you anyway.

“hi, i’m atsumu, the older and cool twin!” he introduced himself, running a chubby hand through his thick, brown hair parted on the right. come to think of it, their hair was parted on different sides.

“whad’ya have for lunch? wanna swap? you can have my vegetables and cheese sandwich.” your eyes wandered down to the open box in his lap, filled with delicious bread and vegetables that made your mouth water. you haven’t even had breakfast this morning.

“why are you talking to me?” big, brown eyes widened at you dismissing him, when other girls would die for his attention. “i’ve already eaten.”

the loud growling of your stomach made you clutch your upper body, cheeks flaring in shame as the brunette grinned.

“liar! ya can have mine, y’know. here ya go.”

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ♡•°`.

“you were so obnoxious and insufferable to most, but i didn’t see that. i couldn’t care less about what you were like, when you were so nice to me.”

it hadn’t taken you too long to finally notice other differences between the twins. because sometimes when standing in front of either of them, you couldn’t quite tell if the part was on the left or right.

osamu’s eyes were a dark gray, while atsumu’s were brown, like molten chocolate. atsumu would always sound excited, his voice distinguishable from miles away, while osamu was more reserved and preferred calmness.

except for when the two were together, of course. atsumu was quite against introducing you to him, complaining to you that people always ended up liking his brother more, much to his chagrin.

but you were so alone all the time, so he dragged you along to watch him practice one day.

“hey… is that that girl?”

your body language was tense, the discomfort written all over your face as you gazed holes into the floors of the gym, where teammates of the twins were whispering among each other.

“i don’t think they want me here.” you didn’t look sad when you said it, nor did you look upset, it seemed like you’d already accepted it. atsumu had known you for weeks, and osamu had just met you, but it was the first time the two stepped up to defend someone instead of bickering at each other like they did all the time.

“hey, ya pricks! are ya not ashamed to be pickin’ on a girl?”

it had resulted in a fight, with the other members of the volleyball team complaining loudly about how atsumu was such a loudmouth despite being new, telling him to shut up.

it was the wrong timing perhaps, because punches started being thrown, but as you intervened and kicked the boys who dared to lay a hand on either of the twins, a feeling of fuzzy warmth spread inside of you as you could only think of the boy who shared his lunches with you.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ♡•°`.

“sometimes, i wish i could go back to relive those days. what i wouldn’t do to have you share one of your lunchboxes with me or have you include me in your life one more time.”

middle school seemed to pass in a blur, and you three graduated together, already knowing you’d be attending the same high school.

neither of you had the best grades or the best reputation, but at the end of the day, you happily held the certificates in your hands, having the twins’ parents snap photos of you three. one of those photos that had been taken that day, with atsumu and you shyly standing next to each other, would soon be framed and placed on your nightstand.

your parents didn’t attend. the sight of all students being hugged, kissed and celebrated by their families, while you were on your own chipped away at your heart.

“hey!” atsumu’s loud voice pulled you out of your train of thoughts, and he pointed at his parents looking through osamu’s report while smiling. “what’re ya bein’ so gloomy for? my parents are waitin’!”

with furrowed brows, you stared at the brunette, not quite understanding what he meant by that. you were going to head home, why would mr. and mrs. miya be waiting for you?

“we’re goin’ to this great barbecue place at the mall!” atsumu had told you about it before, the miyas had a tradition of going there for birthdays or other celebrations. it almost made you envious, because you didn’t have that.

“is that so?” you smiled at him, “have fun, tsumu. i’ll see you after the holidays.”

before you could turn around and leave, the boy tugged at your sleeve, pulling you back and towards his parents. you were stunned.

“i saved up all year to pay for yer meal! made my parents reserve an extra seat for you!”

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ♡•°`.

“it all went to hell when my pride got in the way. when you started hanging out with that girl, and i felt threatened by her.”

it was in your second year of high school when things had started shifting between you two. you were more than used to the fans who went crazy for the two, which progressively started getting unbearable at some point.

flooded lockers with letters and chocolates they’d share with you, countless confessions you’d hear and see, and girls bombarding you with favors of getting them closer to either of the twins.

you could live with that. after all, they weren’t popular for no reason. they were handsome, very much so, and they were volleyball prodigies, scoring countless points for inarizaki at each game.

there was one girl who had gotten atsumu’s attention as much as he had gotten hers. they were in the same class, too. it was osamu who told you they had started hanging out when you were surprised about them going to get lunch together, with him nudging her side and making her chuckle.

you had woken up half an hour earlier just to prepare a lunchbox you could share with the blonde. but at the end of the day, you sullenly sat at the same table with osamu and the rest of the team, staring at the untouched food. the atmosphere was awkward, and the boys exchanged glances, clueless as to if they should speak up and ask you what’s wrong.

“that looks really good.” of course suna was the first to talk, narrow eyes peering over at your lunch. “why aren’t ya eatin’ it?”

aran shook his head at the middle blocker’s directness, and osamu frowned when you shoved the pink box towards suna, no more having an appetite after watching atsumu and that girl sitting together. “you can have it.”

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ♡•°`.

“jealousy is truly an ugly thing. so is love. it makes you do questionable things. but all i wanted was to protect you from heartbreak, even if it was at the expense of my own heart.”

the more time atsumu spent with her, the more worried you got. especially since there was some sort of sixth sense telling you that she was bad news.

you hated her for taking atsumu away from you, yes. but if she had been good for him, you would’ve accepted it, no matter how difficult. it was just that you knew she was no good.

“‘samu, i heard her talking to her girl friends in the dressing rooms after P.E.” you had bolted to osamu’s desk before the class would start, hair disheveled from the former class, and you were out of breath.

the younger miya quirked a thick brow at your words, “emma, you mean?” you nodded frantically, “she’s just using him for popularity. said she wants to dump him when he gets famous after high school, and she does too.”

osamu wasn’t really interested in entertaining any drama, especially when it came to his annoying brother. he could see how concerned you were for him though, and he couldn’t blame you for it. atsumu was very important to you, after all.

“are ya sure?” it wasn’t like he didn’t believe you. he just thought it might be a stretch. how was emma going to lead atsumu on for over a year, and how could she be so sure that he was going to be famous after high school?

“maybe she was just kiddin’. are ya sure you’re not just jealous?”

you were biting your lip, looking truly troubled. you did not want to ruin things, but you had to help atsumu get away from that bitch. you could not allow her to ruin him.

“‘samu, i—”

“atsumu is 17. neither of us should have t’tell him what to do. he has to learn himself.”

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ♡•°`.

“i had never planned on taking osamu’s advice from the second i heard it. in my mind, the only reasonable thing was to make her stay away from you.”

it was exactly a week later after gym class that you cornered the same girl against the lockers. no one else was around, and with a hand against her mouth, you made sure she didn’t call for any help.

“what are you—” a surprised squeal left her lips when you slammed her back against the locker one more time, to make her shut up. with wide eyes, she looked into yours that were void of any emotion.

she knew who you were. the twin’s childhood friend, atsumu’s close friend. too close for the brunette’s liking.

“listen,” you warned her, glowering at her like she was your worst enemy, “i know what you’re plannin’. i will tell you this this just this once: stay away from him.”

you thought it would have been enough to seperate those two, to keep atsumu safe. to have him back.

of course it wouldn’t be. you couldn’t have known. it wasn’t until the very next day that it all backfired. when you entered the school grounds in the morning, school bag thrown over your shoulder and lunch prepared in hopes of getting to spend time with atsumu today after a long time, you soon noticed that something was off.

everyone was staring at you, whispering and gossiping. it was an all-too familiar sight to you, it was nothing new. ignoring it all, you proceeded to your locker that was next to atsumu’s. just to be greeted by emma leaning against yours, arms crossed in front of her chest as she wore a hoodie you’d recognize anywhere. it belonged to atsumu.

“move,” you gritted your teeth as you forced your eyes away from the hoodie, ready to shove her aside. “or what?” she feigned a pout, kicking against the locker to get everyone’s attention on you two, her voice loud enough for everyone to hear. “gonna threaten and hurt me again to get what ya want? because you can’t handle that he never wanted you?”

everything around you got quiet, students looking at each other in disbelief, and your hands clenched into tight fists. still, you kept quiet, knowing it would be bad if you caved in first.

“oh wait, could it be?” she suddenly clapped her hands together, chuckling while you deadpanned at her, seemingly unaffected by her attitude, when in reality, you were boiling from the inside out. “did you really think he’d choose you over me? he would never stoop so low! in fact, he actually told me you were not—”

everything happened fast after that. she was on the floor before she could blink, screaming as your enraged self was on top of her, seeing red. it was when you were at the principal’s office with cotton up your bleeding and bruised nose, and the scratches on your cheeks from when emma’s friends had dragged you off of her, that you finally realized what you’d done.

it only filled you with regret when atsumu came to cradle a crying, hurt emma in his arms, yelling at you to never, ever look at either of the two again.

maybe you should have listened to osamu, after all.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ♡•°`.

“school after that was hell for me, understandably. i couldn’t blame anyone for not talking to me anymore, most of all, you. i didn’t have the right to be hurt by you taking emma to that barbecue place with your parents after high school graduation… but i cried a lot that day.”

osamu had tried to get atsumu to talk to you again. to not be so mad at you. but the blonde was blind to the eyes and deaf to whatever his brother would tell him, so he eventually gave up on that, too.

you were too prideful and hurt to approach atsumu either, pretending that you hated him for having done this to you. he was the cause that you were a loser again. that you lost the only people you had in your life.

couldn’t he just have treasured you more?

it was on the day of your high school graduation that you asked the younger twin to talk for just a minute. gray-haired boy looked down at you, round eyes blinking multiple times as you offered him a small smile.

“i just wanted to let you know that i’m moving to tokyo for college.” he just stared at you, knowing very damn well you weren’t in the mood to smile like you were doing right now. “i heard you’re opening a shop soon. maybe our paths will cross again one day.”

when osamu didn’t say anything, you took it as a hue to leave, again having neither of your parents to share your success of having graduated with you. you rummaged in your bag before you could leave though, holding a letter in your hand that your fingers were itching to hand to him. “can you just give this to—”

actually, no. it didn’t matter.

with glassy eyes, you dropped the envelope back into your bag, zipping it shut. “forget it. take care, ‘samu.”

you cried on your entire way home, until you went to sleep that night.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ♡•°`.

“i regret not having given osamu that letter to this day, even years later. i’ve just recently added these paragraphs, because i’ve made up my mind to make this letter reach you anyway.”

the volleyball match playing on the tv served as background noise while you went through the cleaned kitchen at the hotel restaurant you’d worked at. everyone else had left already, and all that was done was to check the inventory and make sure everything was where it should be.

while checking off certain tasks you had to make sure were done, you halfway listened to the interviews after the match was over. it hadn’t even dawned on you that it was his team that had played today.

“is there anything you want to tell your fans after the great victory today, miya-san?”

your entire body froze, pen dropping on the list as your tired eyes wandered to the television. he looked breathtaking as ever, even when he was covered in sweat.

“i wanna say somethin’ to a certain someone, actually.” his grin made your heart stop, baring his pearly whites as his voice was slightly hoarse from all the yelling on the court. “i’m sure she’s watchin’ this right now.”

the reporter looked at atsumu with a curious, bright smile as she waited for him to continue, microphone right below his panting mouth. “who’s the lucky woman?” she questioned, which made him beam at the cameras.

you didn’t feel addressed, too certain that he had another lover he wanted to say something to. about to turn the tv off and announce your work as done for the night, you were stopped when he opened his mouth again.

“my nemesis, you could say,” he took a deep breath after answering the shorter woman’s question, “i got your letter. you know where i’ll be!”

this couldn’t be a coincidence. you had missed today’s airing of TO ALL THE MEN YOU’VE LOVED BEFORE, and they had confirmed that atsumu had gotten the letter. it had to be you, there was no way he meant someone else.

after a quick research, you found out that the match was indeed aired live and had taken place in hyogo, where both of you had grown up in. where you had moved back to after college, because tokyo wasn’t your home, hyogo was.

you knew exactly which place atsumu hinted at, and like a flash, you passed by the hotel lobby to speed towards the location.

it hadn’t even taken you ten minutes to arrive at the school gates of inarizaki high school. it had been a stupid pinky promises between you two while you were still on talking term; to meet where things ended, shall they ever end.

standing at that spot made your gut churn with negative and positive feelings. things had ended indeed, heartbreakingly so. but perhaps this was a chance to make up again. to start from zero.

you waited for at least an hour, you were sure. time didn’t seem to pass like this, and the more you grew aware that it didn’t, the more agitated you became.

what if he didn’t show up?

what if he showed up, just to tell you to go fuck yourself?

“what am i even doing?” you laughed breathlessly, fiddling with the car keys in your pocket. you should just leave. this was absolutely stupid and delusional of you, to actually hope you were going to make up.

“hey.”

stopping in your tracks, you grew aware of the person dressed in black, standing in front of you. they were wearing a mask and had a hood over their head, and they could’ve just been a criminal about to rob you of your money, but you’d recognize those eyes and that voice from anywhere.

this time, you didn’t wait. you didn’t let your pride hold you back as you ran into his arms, dwarfed up by his massive body that had just gotten even bigger over the years. his arms caged you in his form, swallowing all your sobs and cries in his fluffy, black hoodie as he stood still, rubbing the back of your head in soothing circles.

he was there. atsumu actually came. he came to see you. he didn’t hate you anymore.

“i’m so sorry,” you cried for the fiftieth time in five minutes, barely able to pull away as snot and tears ran down your exhausted face. his heart broke at the sight, his own eyes blurring with a wave of tears. “i’m sorry for everything, ‘tsumu. please, please forgive—”

with gentle, warm hands placed on your damp cheeks, tracing over the scars that had been left on you from that fight, he shushed you. “it’s okay.” you hated the mask for muffling his beautiful voice, and you felt your heart crack when a tear slid down his eye, disappearing under the mask. “i’m the one who should be sorry. i was the worst to you. you didn’t deserve any of it.”

he started sniffling, and your mind went blank, eyes wide as you grabbed onto his hands, shaking him softly. “no, no,” you begged him, “i don’t want you to cry. please don’t cry. i made a mistake, i messed it up, not you!”

the setter found himself melting at your touches, letting you pull off his hood and pull down his mask to reveal his face under the night sky. his lips wobbled, nose and cheeks reddening as tears fell from his big, brown hues.

“i deserved your hatred, ‘tsumu.” your hands were cold on his skin as you wiped his tears the second you saw them. he shook his head, “don’t say that. how could i ever hate you?”

with your fingers interlaced, both of you still in a daze, squeezing each other’s hand so tightly to realize that this was real, you took him to your place. because neither of you wanted to let go.

atsumu could cry when he saw the picture of you two from your middle school graduation in one of your cupboards on the wall next to the tv in your living room. what did make him break down was seeing that one hairpin he’d gifted you on your 13th birthday right in front of the framed picture.

“‘samu never stopped talking about you and how sad you looked at our high school graduation.” his reddened eyes didn’t leave the picture even when you stood next to him, almost as if he was too ashamed to look at you. “i’m really sorry. i truly am.”

you smiled up at him nostalgically, like you’d always do back then. he caught it from his peripheral, and it made his heart skip a beat. “we were teenagers, ‘tsumu,” you assured him while your hand traced over his broad shoulders. “things happen. i think i had to lose you to grow up and realize things.”

his body finally turned to you to face you. his hair was a softer, lighter blonde now, nearly white. it looked fluffier, too. his cheekbones were more sculpted, and you could feel the slightest stubble on his chin.

no matter how many years would pass, you’d always be in love with each and every version of atsumu.

“realize what?” his features were soft, thick eyebrows raising in question while you looked away bashfully. you’d written it in the letter. he just wanted you to say it out loud, because he was dying to hear you say it.

“atsumu, i…” you started, playing with the collar of his hoodie. he stopped breathing. “i’ve been in love with you since forever. since the very first time you shared your lunch with me.”

the cat was out of the bag. you exhaled a shaky breath, and before you could muster up the courage to look back at the now professional athlete, he beat you to it. atsumu was always bold. he took what he wanted, with no shame. he made you realize this once again when he planted his lips on you immediately after tilting your face up.

one short kiss was enough for you to ask more. now that you had him in your arms again, you wanted all of him. you had waited so long for the impossible to happen. and now that you finally had it…

“‘tsumu. kiss me again, please.”

so he did. again and again. to show you how sorry he was, to show you that he hadn’t meant any of the crap he had pulled on you years ago. he was a dumb prick, and he won’t ever forgive himself for what he’d done. he had missed out on so much with you, and he saw that one more time when you were seated on his lap in the dim living room, hovering above him needily.

you were all he ever needed. it felt like now he had you back again, a gap had been filled inside of him. one that nothing and no one was able to fill. no one could ever replace you, no emma, no girl, no one.

every kiss and touch was followed by him muttering apologies into your skin, worshipping your skin like it was holy. handling you with utmost care like you were made out of porcelain. he watched you fall apart from him just fondling you through your clothes.

“p—please, i need—” you sucked in a breath when you felt his bulge pressing through his sweatpants, prodding at your slacks. “need you, please. want to be yours.”

atsumu hummed into your neck as his strong hands carefully took off your blouse, revealing your bra-clad chest. “y’look so sexy in these clothes,” he mumbled, admiring the sight of you shakily unbuttoning your pants. “wanna see you in them every day when you go to work and when you come home.”

you whined at his lowly spoken words, letting him help you take off your pants. your clammy hands tugged at his hoodie and sweatpants that were soon gone as well, pooling at the floor.

atsumu’s body looked absolutely gorgeous. the second it was revealed to you, you traced your fingers over every ridge and cranny of his arms and upper body, sucking marks on and kissing his supple, firm skin that was still so soft.

“baby,” atsumu huffed, feeling his cock twitching at every single movement of yours. you were driving him crazy. “lemme do the rest, kay? i want tonight t’be all about you.”

nodding softly, you waited with bated breath as atsumu unclasped your bra and let it thud to the floor, joining the rest of your clothes. the way he licked his lips and groaned made you soak through your panties. moans and whimpers freely spilled from your glossy mouth once he latched his soft lips onto one of the mounds, while his hand paid attention to the other, twirling your hardened nipple between warm fingers.

“perfect tits,” he panted into your chest, looking up to meet your gaze as he licked his wet lips. “yer perfect, darlin’. everything about you is.” stammering pleas for atsumu to continue while you ran your fingers through his soft strands, you shuddered upon his unoccupied hand wandering down your stomach, until it settled at the hem of your lace panties.

“want me to go on, baby?”

his eyes were blown wide in lust and desire, fingers digging into your skin enough to leave marks. you bit your lip, whimpering through your teeth as you nodded. “yes, please, atsumu...”

atsumu knew you were wet from how you’d soaked the front of his light gray boxers, but actually feeling how aroused you were made him utter curses. it was so much, and you produced even more slick with just a single touch. how fucking adorable.

“so, so wet,” he groaned as one of his fingers slipped inside your clenching hole so easily, “fuck, so tight n’ warm. yer gonna make me cum, princess. fuck…”

he couldn’t wait to feel you around his cock. couldn’t wait to be engulfed by your warmth, to feel all of you. with big, wide eyes, he watched as you came undone on his fingers in just a minute, clutching his bare, sculpted shoulders while you creamed on his long digits. it was the prettiest thing he’d ever seen, and he wanted more.

“‘tsumu—” your thighs were shaking, and you kissed his jaw sloppily. “wan’ me to suck you off?” you couldn’t be serious. atsumu was literally seconds from creaming in his boxers, and you offered a blowjob to him so sweetly? he had to physically keep you in place to stop your hips from moving.

“no, i wanna feel your pretty pussy ‘round my dick,” he panted, and you obediently reached your deft fingers to pull at the waistband of his boxers. despite both of you being very desperate and impatient, you still took the time to take off each other’s underwear.

it was the need to be connected without anything disrupting you, rather than to ravage each other. although you were aware that if atsumu wasn’t going to dick you down in this very moment, you were going to explode.

you saw a glimpse of atsumu’s girthy and gorgeous cock before it started disappearing inside of your awaiting cunt. his hands gripped your hips tightly, keeping you still, while you mewled and sighed into his neck.

“how d’ya feel, angel?” atsumu’s voice was serene, calm, as he enjoyed the warmth he was buried inside of to the hilt. he was never going to let you go again, ever. “f—feels… so full,” you whined, raising your head from his shoulder to look into his eyes. “y’re so big, ‘tsumu. so warm. love it.”

leaning back against the back of the couch, the blonde started a sensual and slow pace, and you felt so overwhelmed that you didn’t know any better than to kiss him. moving your hips back and forth with his hands guiding you, you swallowed each other’s moans of passion and love, tongues clashing and lips molding together and becoming one.

atsumu and you were made for each other. you were made to be with him. you were each other’s destiny.

“i love you,” you started crying when the sensation started building inside of your gut, threatening to snap. “love you s’much, ‘tsumu. i love you so much.” atsumu kissed your tears away, listening to you babbling confessions and apologies as you kept clenching around him as if you wanted him inside of you forever.

“i love you too,” he grunted, punctuating his words with harder and faster snaps of his hips against your heat. the sounds of squelches and moans echoed across your apartment that had been empty and devoid of life and love for years. “will never let you go again. i’m so sorry.”

atsumu knew he was nearing his release, and his eyes frantically looked for yours, sweat clinging to his forehead and body as his hair stuck to his face. you were cross-eyed, digging your nails into his shoulders as if you wanted him even closer.

“need t’cum inside of you, angel,” atsumu hissed the more you tightened around him, nearly trapping him inside of you. “can i fill you up? please, please…”

nodding mindlessly, you wrapped your arms around atsumu’s neck, working you both towards a release. you were the first to cave in, hips stilling as you let out a high-pitched moan while waves of white came crashing down.

with a slack jaw and eyes rolled back into his skull, atsumu started releasing spurts of his warm seed into your womb, cock twitching until his balls were empty while you relished in his warmth he had shared with you.

neither of you moved, not even minutes later, feeling like you have melted into one body. the silence in the apartment finally felt peaceful instead of haunting, the second pair of eyes in it filling you with a sense of home.

atsumu’s fingers combed through your damp hair while you laid your head on his built chest, listening to his calming heartbeat. it was a matter of time till this tranquil moment was going to vanish.

“i must say, thinking about you having fought for me is really hot—” you cut him off by pinching the tender skin on his chest, which made him yelp. “ow!”

“i hate you, atsumu.”

you knew damn well you didn’t.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ ♡•°`.

[deathmetalunicorn1]

A RoR request!

Boa Hancock reader who is reputed as the most beautiful woman in the world, something that Aphrodite herself acknowledges when she entered the arena. She still possesses OP Boa's characteristics which is being prideful, arrogant, selfish and a man hater to protect herself from being enslaved in her childhood. Since she ate the Mero Mero fruit she can turn her opponents into stone if they're ever attracted to her, which flabbergasted the gods and human warriors alike. After effortlessly defeating a lower god she proudly proclaims the iconic quote "no matter what I do, the world will always forgive me! Why's that? That right, it is because I am beautiful!" Shocking everyone in the arena with her egoism. After the fight she quickly rushes to her lover and acts like a teenage girl having a crush, which no one will ever expect or believe if someone tells them that the great pirate Empress acts soft, compassionate and kind around her lover only.

The partner can be anybody else! But I wanna emphasize on Qin Shi Huang since they're both rulers hehe

Bonus if Aphrodite wants to befriend her and share beauty secrets to each other!

I hope this request is comprehensible, thank you~!!

My queen! Best girl ever!!! Thank you for requesting this!!!

-Perfection, that’s the word many used to describe you, even Aphrodite, who was in awe of your beauty. Men and women alike adored you; they couldn’t help but stare when you passed by- you radiated confidence and power.

-You knew that you were beautiful so those foolish enough who believed they could flatter you with mere words were sorely mistaken.

-Their praise meant nothing to you, coming from those beneath you, your cold glares had them swooning over themselves, but why wouldn’t they? You were the most beautiful woman in the world after all.

-Only a very small handful of people knew the truth about your past, you had been enslaved by cruel men as a child, and escaped as a young teenager, fleeing with your sisters.

-The massive scar on your back, after burning the brand off of you, was the only blemish on your body, but you always kept it hidden, your dark secret.

-Brunnhilde approached you to request that you fight on behalf of humanity, and she had to admit that you were intimidating, your eyes were cold and dull, staring down at her as if she were trash before you stood from your throne and approached, heels clicking beneath you, “I will fight for you, Valkyrie. There is too much at stake if I leave the fighting up to all of these men.”

-She gave you a firm nod, thanking you before leaving. You folded your arms, staring after the Valkyrie before you turned, looking at two photographs you had on a table, one of your sisters and one of the man you loved, “Really too much at stake.”

-Heimdall introduced you and the cheers were near deafening as men and women alike, humans and gods, roared with cheers, adoration on their faces, seeing you walking out.

-Aphrodite smiled softly, leaning her chin on her hand, “Ahh my dear friend, I can’t wait to see you battle. It will be stunning.” You had found a good friend in Aphrodite, as you both were incredibly beautiful, but instead of competing, you compared beauty tips and through it, you became close friends.

-As you walked out, Heimdall stood in your way, still hyping the crowds up.

-A sharp kick had him flying head over heels and many were stunned by your actions. He sat up, “Why did you kick me?!” your sharp glare had him instantly blushing, folding under your gaze as your stance shifted, a hand coming to your hip as you spoke, “You dare speak to me in such a way- you scum!” as you finished, you were leaning so far back that you were looking at the sky, pointing a finger at him with your other hand.

-The crowds and Heimdall both went crazy, celebrating that you did your ‘extreme looking down pose’ as you stood back up.

-Your opponent was a cocky man, who was leering at you as if you were meat and he was a starving dog, making you glare slightly.

-The match started, and you instantly lifted your hands in front of your chest, “Mero-mero-mero!!” a heart shaped beam came from your hands and instantly turned him into a stone statue, leaving him immobile before you walked over, a hand on your hip before roundhouse kicking him, shattering the statue, “Perfume Femur!”

-Jaws were dropped all around, the match lasted less than 30 seconds!! Before the crowds went wild, seeing that you had won so easily.

-Many were angry, demanding to know about that ability of yours, but since you came to Valhalla with it, after you died, it was a part of you, so you were allowed to use it according to the rules.

-You lifted a hand to your lips, breathing out lightly before brushing your hair back over your shoulder, instantly getting everyone blushing hard again, “No matter what I do, the world will always forgive me! Why’s that? That’s right, it’s because I am beautiful!”

-Your giant ego was shocking for so many; you were so arrogant! But those who tried to be angry with you couldn’t help but look at you in adoration, you were truly so beautiful, they couldn’t stay mad at you.

-You then heard a voice call out, “Y/N!” gazes turned to a man who was smiling brightly, waving at you, many in shock that he called to you so casually as he ran over, entering the arena.

-Jaws dropped as he took your hands, “You did it! You were amazing!” but your reaction was even more shocking as you instantly flushed, pulling away as you held your cheeks, turning from him, looking like a shy teenager!

-Qin Shi Huang-  He adored you, you were a ruler just like him and he admired that you created an island nation of nothing but women, to keep them safe and raised them all to be fierce warriors. He was a little oblivious to your reactions around him, when you would get shy and flustered, not seeing it how others saw it, seeing how cute you acted. Many were jealous that he had managed to get to you first, but that was something that drew you to him, he didn’t treat you like an object or a prize to be won, he treated you as a person, he treated you like the empress you were. When he would praise you, others around you couldn’t help but watch you scurry back behind a pillar, hiding and holding your bright red face, your voice coming out a bit higher in pitch. You really were too cute.

-Kojiro- Jaws were dropped all around, how did Kojiro get you?! They all turned to stone in shock when Kojiro hugged you, picking you up easily and spinning you around, “I’m so proud of you Y/N! But I knew you were going to win! You’re the best!” your hands came to your mouth as a sharp gasp escaped you, a flush taking over your full head, thinking to yourself, ‘Is this- is this a proposal?!’ your thoughts immediately went to your wedding with Kojiro as he beamed up at you. Kojiro held your hand, not paying any attention to your flustered self as he led you backstage. Kojiro treated you like a ruler, you were an empress and a warrior, you were not someone to be taken lightly, and his laid back, friendly nature, just seemed to draw you to him. He seemed not affected by your beauty, which was unheard of, but after realizing that he loved you for you, not for your looks, you fell even harder.

[calisources]

THE ONE WITH THE FACE OF AN ANGEL. all sentences and quotes were taken from Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel the Series. all lines are by Angel and his soulless self, Angelus, so be warned a few of these are explicit or allude to sexual acts or have double meaning. change names, pronouns and locations (and ages) as you see fit.

That Slayer...she's a pistol.

I wanna torture you. I used to love it, and it's been such a long time. I mean, the last time I tortured someone, they didn't even have chainsaws.

Hey! Who's a guy gotta kill to get a drink around here?!

How sweet that virgin tasted, the fresh smell of a newborn's neck. My first nun - now that's a great story.

As for you, you luscious thing. I mean, you were going to let me out of that cage, so, let's see. I'll give you, what, a ten second start.

Don't be jealous, kitten. She's just the warm-up. I'll save the good stuff for you.

Angel,I love you,but I can't be with you...you ate babies...chicks.

The rumors are true. Angel has left the building, and I am back.

What won't I miss? The moralizing. Soul's already in the ether, boyo. I can smell it.

Tell you what. I'll torture ya for a few unbelievably long hours, and you can tell me if this is the lifestyle for you.

Passion rules us all. And we obey. What other choice do we have? Passion is the source of our finest moments.

If we could live without passion, maybe we'd know some kind of peace. But we would be hollow. Empty rooms, shuttered and dank.

Kill you? Why would I kill you when I can live off you for a month?

I don't want to share my feelings.I don't want to open up. I want to find the guy who killed Tina and look him in the eye.

Are you mad at me for being around too much or not being around enough?

I don't need strength. I just need the sun to rise.

I hated the girls back then.especially the noble women...they were just incredibly dull.

They have no taste for the undead. Not that a sting would do me any damage, it's just... tonight's special.

There's a lot I don't understand. I do know it's important to keep fighting. I learned that from you.

My people, before I was changed, they exchanged this as a sign of devotion. It's a claddagh ring.

Wear it with the heart pointing towards you. It means you belong to somebody.

I'm sorry. I wanted to take you out somewhere fun. It's been a long time since I've been to the movies. They've changed.

How can we be together if the cost is your life, or the lives of others? I know. I couldn't tell you. I wasn't sure - if I could do it if I woke up with you one more morning.

Don't mistake me. I do love the ladies. It's just lately... I've been wondering... what it'd be like... to share the slaughter of innocents... with another man.

Don't... I don't think that makes me some kind of a deviant, hmm? Do you?

Sorry about the chains. It's not that I don't trust you, it's... Actually, it is that I don't trust you.

I can walk like a man but I'm not one.

I'm weak. I've never been anything else.

I wanted to lose myself in you. I know it will cost me my soul, and part of me didn't care. It's not the demon in me that needs killing, Buffy, it's the man.

For a hundred years I offered ugly death to everyone I met, and I did it with a song in my heart.

You're a wreck! She's stronger than any Slayer you've ever faced. Force won't get it done. You gotta work from the inside. To kill this girl... you have to love her.

Let me guess, you summoned back the true Angelus because you need a new boy toy.

Oh, my cure? No, thanks. Been there, done that, and deja vu just isn't what it used to be.

The elders conjured the most perfect punishment for me. They restored my soul.

When you become a vampire, the demon takes your body, but it doesn't get your soul; that's gone. No conscience, no remorse, it's an easy way to live.

You have no idea what it's like to have done the things I've done...and care. I haven't fed on a human being since that day.

See? Whenever we fight you always bring up the vampire thing.

Gave her the puppy dog "I'm all tortured" act. Keeps her off my back when I feed.

Listen, if we date, you and I both know one thing's going to lead to another.

This isn't some fairy tale. When I kiss you, you don't wake up from a deep sleep and live happily ever after.

I did a lot of unconscionable things when I became a vampire. Drusilla was the worst. She was ... an obsession of mine. She was pure, sweet, and chaste.

Killed everybody she loved. Visited every mental torture on her I could devise. She eventually fled to a convent, and on the day she took her holy orders, I turned her into a demon.

She made me feel like a human being. That's not the kind of thing you just forgive.

Spike, boy you never did learn your history.

If I was blind, I would see you.

A demon isn't a man. I was a man once.

Because I wanted to! Because I want you so badly! I want to take comfort in you.

Am I a thing worth saving, huh?! Am I a righteous man? The world wants me gone!

I watched you, I saw you called, it was a bright afternoon out in front of your school. You walked down the steps and ... I loved you.

Because I could see your heart. You held it before you for everyone to see, and I was worried that it would get bruised or torn. And more than anything in my life, I wanted to keep it safe.

I can stay in town as long as you want me.

I never was much for preachers.

God, I missed watching this.

I’ll start working on the second front. Try not to use it.

Hm. You smell so good. So warm. I miss that.

You're wrong. You don't know what it is you're asking me to do.

Oh, what's the matter? Look a little nervous.

They always mistake me for the character I play. They never see the real me!

When you kill them. Some just stand there frozen while others.. . 

This was about saving somebody's soul. That's what I do here and you're not a part of it.

That's great, it's nice you moved on; I can't. You found someone new; I'm not allowed to, remember?

I see you again, it cuts me up inside, and the person I share that with is me.

You don't know me anymore, so don't come down here with your great new life and expect me to do things your way. Go home.

Buttering me up. Getting me all relaxed, hm? Not the most innovative interrogation technique, but... OK, I'll play.

Well, now that's a question. Not a great question. Not even an insightful question. 

So much for stand by your man. Then again, you probably like her on her knees.

The more you piss me off, the longer I'll keep you alive.

Oh, something tells me she's a screamer.

Hey, you remember that time you tried to get Angel to kill you because you felt all weepy over being such a bad little girl. Huh? Do you still feel that way? Do you still wanna die?

Well, it's not really the kind of message you tell. It sort of involves finding the bodies of all your friends.

I don't need to see movies to get worked up. Just being around you does that just fine. It feels nice, just to feel.

You still my girl?

I know what you're thinking. Maybe there's some good deep down inside of me that remembers and loves you, if only you could reach me.

You know what I just can't believe, all of our time together and we never tried chains.

Dream on, schoolgirl. Your boyfriend is dead and you're all gonna join him.

[duchess-of-oldtown]

House of the Dragon Season 2, Episode 1 Thoughts

Just clarifying, these are my own thoughts, you don't like them, don't bother telling me so. Also, I'm not a book purist, I like adaptions taking putting their own spin on things - if it makes sense to do so. So, here were my thoughts. Obvs, this post is dark and full of spoilers.

I loved the opening, the whole callback to the White Walkers which cements the true arc of ASOIAF (and feels a fuck you to s8)

THEY CALLED VHAGAR THAT HOARY OLD BITCH, ONE OF MY FAVOURITE BOOK QUOTES

Rhaenys ate, she fucking ate, that's it girl you remind Daemon of your daughter and his place (you know that Daemon loved that shit)

And Daemon? The whole mother vs the Queen speech? What do you think YOUR mother would have done? Alyssa Targaryen would have done exactly the same if it were you torn apart and you goddamn know it.

Yes, Corlys mourning Luke. Everyone mourning Luke 😭😭😭

Alyn of Hull, slay.

Am I the only one who kinda thinks that the Hightower Sigil looks a little clip-arty? It's just not it 😬

I really wish they made the scorpions look better. I just always thought that the weapons would be more advanced because they actually know dragons.

Aegon and Helaena, you can sort of see that Aegon does care about her but he just doesn't know what to do with her.

Alicent ALICENT WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. GET THAT MAN AWAY FROM THERE

Also Criston? Giving head? Yeah, I'd think the sharks are real before I believed that.

Where was the build up to... That?

I actually fucking shuddered. SHUDDERED.

Tyland don't fucking annoy that little boy.

Terms? You killed her little boy and you sent terms?

Yes, Aegon you humiliate that Lannister bitch.

Why is Jaehaerys so sweet? 😭😭😭😭

Dalton Greyjoy mention!!

Mine are Bigger - Actual Aegon II energy

Why is Aemond sitting there like 🥺🥺🥺? You fucked up my guy.

Emma is heartbreaking.

Syrax never grew? Why she so tiny?

Arrax was so beautiful.

The actual stab of grief I got watching Rhaenyra on the beach. That was her baby. That was her little boy.

Aegon the Magnamious?

Aegon being nice on the throne? Being kind to the shepherd?

Your goats? No, sheep even better. 🙂 Aegon, I am meant to hate you.

Otto get fucked, Aegon was doing his best.

Hugh? Hugh Hammer? Girl,get the fuck out of here, asking for money and shit.

I can see a lot of ppl going to whine about them humanising Aegon but it's necessary? Complex characters and our relationships with them is GRRM's greatest skill.

Larys get away from that boy.

This is a green heavy episode. I know why but still, give us some Joffrey maybe? Some House Baratheon shitting themselves? The Great Houses getting the news and going oh fuck?

Daemon is lowkey right, Mysaria did help place Aegon on the throne but she is also right, he's only that angry with her because nobody else around.

Matt's acting is top tier because you can really see the grief, the anger and the insecurity when he's snarking.

Rhaenyra's return. Her silence, it's fucking gold.

Jace and Rhaenyra 😭😭😭😭 His lil voice. 😭😭😭

Where was Jeyne Arryn? Why no Jeyne??

The funeral 😭 lil Joffrey is too lil. Jace holding him *raptor screams*

Alicent, the fit ate but what good are prayers? Go smack that son of yours.

Somebody hug Rhaenyra. Right now. Rhaenys? Elinda? Baela? Rhaena? Hold that woman.

The CRIME HOODIE is back.

I still hate the gold cloaks' cloaks. They look like piss rags. Does nobody on the staff know what gold is? Look at Sunfyre.

The actual book quotes 🙂🙂🙂🙂

The War of Quills and Ravens, yes, yes

Aemond don't sit with Ser Incelot, he hast done thy mother

Y'know what, Aemond is a lil right, he's getting the blame for starting the war but Alicent and Otto literally laid the foundations?

Why is Criston standing for Otto? He's not a member of the royal family.

Aemond, sitting in that chair is very Daemon of you

Otto, showing off his slutty lil wrist, your pour yourself a lil drinky girl

Blood and Cheese have a lil dog with them. Please don't let anything happen to the dog.

There's something always so eerie about all those tunnels under the Red Keep. It absolutely terrifies me.

Aegon and his buddies sitting on the throne gives off fuck boi vibes and the Strong joke was actually pretty funny.

That Viserys statue is not it.

Why is Blood so fucking massive?

Cheese, did you just fucking kick that dog? I will kill what you love you absolutely bastard.

Oh, those locks. The world building, oh the worldBuilding

The atmosphere is very well captured. The music is on point.

I love the detailing of the interiors of the Red Keep, it's so much better than the OG series.

Oh Helaena.

Helaena, my love. Why Helaena, why her.

Why didn't they just check themselves?

How the fuck did the writers make Blood and Cheese that lack lustre? How the actual fuck do you fumble that?

Alicent, my fucking eyes, MY FUCKING EYES

I'm giving this a 7.5/10. Everyone else was great but HOW DO YOU FUCK UP BLOOD AND CHEESE? HOW? HOW? I DEMAND A TRIAL BY COMBAT

Also I must say, the Biblically accurate Hand of the King chain in the trailer is very good.

[makedonsgriva]

Devil Venerable Also Wants To Know : A Review

So I generally don't do reviews. But going through the tumblr tag and then on AO3 and seeing the abysmal amount of posts and fanfics, I am writing this review in hopes of someone reading this and then getting convinced by my agenda.

Because Devil Venerable Also Wants to Know deserves to be read by yall.

IT. IS. SO. GOOD.

To summarize, we start with the leader of the demonic Xuanyuan Sect, Wenren E, getting a copy of a trashy romance novel, Abusive Romance.

What baffles him is that he, a logical, rational person who has never felt love in his life, is the second lead and falls in love with the Mary Sue female lead and gives up everything for her and dies in the end for her too.

What makes him even more confused that after he dies in the novel, his loyal subordinate Yin Hanjiang is driven to madness and is hell bent on revenge, pursuing the female lead to kill her.

Wenren E decides that this cannot be allowed. He is not afraid of death, (although he does mind that it was for a stupid reason and not on his own terms) but he very much minds the fact that his subordinate went insane after it. So he sets out to re write destiny.

Now let's talk about the highlights of this book

The Characters

DVAWTK is full of interesting, fun and exciting characters who will remain etched in your memory. Whether it is the sensuous, ruthless and ambitious Shu Yanyan or the wise, perceptive and kind Zhongli Qian, there is a multitude of characters to pick from to love and adore and all of them have deeper and hidden depths that give them layers of complexities.

Not to mention, DVAWTK has several strong and amazing female characters. I have mostly read MXTX books and this is where she lacks the most: hardly any strong female characters. She writes shockingly amazing characters but most of them are male and I mostly don't mind but I do wish I got some great girls to cherish in there too.

Cyan Wings does not disappoint in that aspect. All their female characters are wonderfully well fleshed out. Especially Baili Qingmiao. Seeing her go from the biggest girlfailure to an absolute girlboss over 70 something chapters is satisfying in a sense the way, and I quote the book here, "one feels about their first daughter finally grow up" Chef's kiss truly.

The Plot

The plot is engaging but nothing too crazy, if I am being honest. Apart from a couple of reveals and plot twists that were shocking, it mostly stuck to a more or less predictible story line. That does not mean it was not good; it was. Most of the arcs keep you engaged enough to keep reading without being able to put the story down and tie into each other seamlessly. As such, there are no plot holes and stupid or unnecessary story lines. It works very well to support the characters and their personal growth and arcs.

The Humour

Top notch. So well done. Got me laughing out loud multiple times and earned me a lot of weird looks from my roommate but all worth it. SVSSS was the funniest work I read but DVAWTK gives it a run for its money in terms of the comedy it has and also it's general unhinged-ness, mostly thanks to it's characters. Everyone at the Demonic Xuanyuan Sect is a goofball although they are not trying to be. The skeleton lady Qiu Congxue has no brains. Literally. A ghost ate it so you can guess just how well she is faring in the books.

(she still is immensely powerful tho)

The Romance

So far the biggest freaks I had found while reading Danmei are Mo Ran and Luo Binghe.

Yin Hanjiang is a hundred times worse.

He is an absolute psycho, a complete nutter, powerful beyond comprehension and hopelessly devoted to Wenren E. And Wenren E, once realising his own feelings, thinks it is all so hot!! (makes you really wonder just who is more insane among the two)

My subordinate wants to destroy the entire cultivation world after my death? He has my full support that's so cute of him <3

Freak4freak with some very beautiful and tender moments and an absolute badass power couple who kick ass together in battles. Truly amazing. I love love love wenrenjiang.

The World building

Wonderfully well done and also easy to follow! I especially liked how cultivation was viewed from a different light in this novel and how the book explores the ways it is actually harmful to mortals. I actually learnt a lot about various cultivation stages from this novel and came to understand some common aspects of xianxia novels. DVAWTK uses many technical terms in terms of cultivation and it is fun to read and learn about it

Found Family

Need I say more? Like what's better than a bunch of idiots coming together and growing on their journey thanks to each other? *gently holds Su Huai, Baili Qingmiao, Qiu Congxue and Zhongli Qian in my palms* they are so important to me

Final Thoughts

DVAWTK is a great read with a very satisfying ending. It keeps you hooked till the very end and I am honestly surprised it is so underrated. I am very glad it is getting an official translation soon so hopefully, it will amass more readers although the unofficial translation I read is also very good. It deserves way more hype and fans then it has because it's so silly, so good and so well done. Ugh I hope it also gets some kind of adaptation some day to make it more popular because it deserves it all.

Please read this novel. That's what I want to say. You will not be disappointed.

[asmo-d3us]

The Marauder’s Era characters as Uncles/Aunts

James Potter-Black - The Embarrassing Uncle

This man is giving that child ass loads of chocolate and sugar, and Regulus is watching from the side without a word.

Will hear the child fart and will start to tell everyone about what he heard without shame, thinking it’s something cute to say but it’s really not.

Will give you a 2 dollar bill because he thinks that makes him the cool uncle and that’s just even more embarrassing.

He will buy you a toy truck/a Barbie house when you’re 18 and think it’s cute because that’s what they played with “back in his day”.

Will pick you up from school and trip, grab the wrong kid, say hi to an old grandma and get whipped with her cane, cuss in front of a staff member, wear a cartoon t-shirt, etc.

Sirius Lupin - The Judgmental Uncle

Will talk about the wildest shit omd

He’ll be at a family gathering and start talking shit about everyone he can. “Yeah you know uncle Barty? Now, you know I’m not one to judge, but apparently his father whipped him because he fucked a man!” And Lily from 5 miles away is like, “SIRIUS BLACK THAT IS A CHILD!!”

Says the most out of pocket things, like it’ll be complete silence in the room and all of a sudden he says, “…I heard Marlene listening to Olivia Rodrigo, but the songs she made back in her Disney days-“

Remus repeatedly tells him to calm down with some of the shit he says because dear lord-

Was at a pool party once and Regulus got thrown in the pool and he went, “Poor boy can’t even swim, look at him he thinks he’s a mermaid…why’s he flapping around like that?”

Remus Lupin - The Wise ‘Old’ Uncle

Knows the weirdest facts? Like why does this man know how to hide a body (it helps uncle barty and evan at least?)? How turtles look like naked? What’s in outer space? How does he know we aren’t alone?-

Everyone comes to him for facts and studying and homework and he’s just a wise old man who looks younger than everyone else yet he’s smarter??

Will say some stupid quotes and speeches from books/theaters as ‘inspiration’ and he’d think he’s so wise and he just had a mic-drop moment.

Always tells Sirius to mind his own business and calm down yet he’s always being nosy and interrupting conversations with a new quote he heard.

Dedicates every single thing in life after something inspirational. This man is saying the goofiest shit like, “Oh c’mon don’t worry about those things! Hey, you know what I like to say? When life gives you lemons, make lemonade!!”

Peter Pettigrew - The Painfully Independent Uncle

He’s shorter than everyone else and people offer to help him when he’s reaching for the top cabinet but he always denies them bc one of the kids asked him for once.

Perhaps he’s independent because no one pays attention to him and that’s just what he’s used to.

Sorry.

Lily Macdonald-Evans - The Oversharing Aunt

No one knows why she shares so much about everything. She probably saw a poster that was looking for a missing dog and she’d talk to everyone about it.

This woman is yapping whenever she tells a story: “So I walked out of the house and I noticed the crunchy leaves and it reminded me of fall, oh did you know there’s a parade during fall? Crazy! Anyway, so I walked to a cafe and got my order and—WAIT so like the girl was really cute I asked her for her number, she was so sweet and so was the latte! Anyway--“

The type of aunt to order something with you and mention: “Yes that’s my order. I told ___ to order but they’re too embarrassed! Kids these days am’iright?”

Mary Macdonald-Evans - The Story Telling Aunt

This bitch be dropping some bomb ass lore every damn time there’s a family get together/gathering.

“When I was your age we used to go outside. There was this one time where I sliced my thumb in half when running! And then I saw the pope and he blessed me with a banana, and then I went back home and ate a knife—“

“You know, your aunt Lily murdered someone once—“ “did you know that uncle barty once beat me up—“ “uncle James ate 6 bees one time.” “I used to go outside and eat raw fish in the pond and I got salmonella. I could’ve died!”

Is making wild ass hand gestures at the table when telling a story and Lily repeatedly elbows her so she sits tf down.

Marlene Meadows-McKinnon - The unexplainably weird Aunt

Will sometimes approach you and smile at you for 5 minutes before walking away.

Will laugh at something so unfunny and will make a bored face when something is hilarious.

Will cut her finger and drink the blood and start hissing at everyone and will cackle to herself. People start feeling bad for Dorcas.

Will see a hot girl on screen and start barking and growling like a wild animal.

She’s just weird and the kids don’t get it, only the elders do.

Dorcas Meadows - The Artistic Aunt

Has thousands of tattoos that all mean something to her and it’s insane how many she has.

When you enter her house she has a whole room dedicated to her work and she does everything; painting, sketching, drawing, pottery, clay art, tattoos, piercings, etc.

Can look at your face and memorize literally every tiny detail.

Offers to do your tattoos/piercings when you’re older behind your parents’ backs because she gave ear piercings to all of the kids when they were little.

Regulus Potter-Black - The Stern Uncle

Won’t let you eat or drink anything sweet after 6 PM.

Will get upset when you sneak out or ditch school.

Very cold but when you know him very well you can tell his heart is made of gold—I mean seriously how can you think otherwise??? Uncle James is married to him!

Has favorites and allows them to do whatever they want. Will tell kids that if they don’t wash their hands the boogie monster will come and gut them. James told him to stop.

Barty Rosier - The Insane Uncle (duh)

Will casually announce to the whole table that he recently murdered someone. You would sit there in shock and look around the table, noticing that no one even batted an eye. Hell, uncle James asked him how it went!!

His and uncle Evan’s house is all dark and almost satanic. They have real skulls, blood and teeth in jars, they have a whole room filled with all kinds of weapons and body parts. You don’t know how they haven’t been caught yet.

They have a ‘plant’ room that they sell around.

For some reason he’s the best fucking uncle alongside evan and James bc he’s just so fucking funny and cool and chill and his kids are too and sometimes you wish they were your parents instead.

Right when you turn 18 he takes you out to make your ‘first kill’…and it’s not an animal. He also shows you how to defend yourself (if you’re a girl/weak especially), and shows you how to beat the shit out of someone.

Evan Rosier - The Crazy Uncle

Is the only one that manages to balance out barty.

Isn’t that crazy but whenever he is…it’s horrifying. (It turns uncle barty on for some reason?? Their kids hate it.)

Is so hot. Every time a friend is over they all fall in love with him. He notices this and he starts to feed their delusions. Every one hates it. You, Barty, and Sirius find it funny though!

One time he was so angry that he legit went out for a whole day, made Barty worried (which never happens), and came back 3 days later in the middle of the night drenched in blood and 50 murders circling the news.

Pandora does not support this behavior but evan got angry at her one time for bothering him about it and she let it go. They’re very stubborn which means he hasn’t apologized and she still brings it up to make him guilty.

Pandora Lovegood - The Adorable/Therapist Aunt

She’s just so whimsical and sweet and caring and nice and cute and pretty and and and

Always buys you crystals and spiritual things that she insists is very good for you and will protect you.

Surrounds herself with those blue eyes (?) to keep off bad energy.

Is covered in tattoos but they are small and meaningful.

Gives the best advice and her laugh is so fucking adorable.

She’s just here to show you that you belong, that you matter, and to include you in everything so you’re never left out bc she gets it. She’s the only one you can come to for anything.

[knowledgeabletrash]

I have so many feelings about the first Hunt and it’s aftermath from 2x08 & 09! Apologies for the word-vomit below this.

I never thought it would happen, but dare I say, Travis has become one of my favorite characters this season.

As an older sibling, I was right there with Travis these last two episodes. His guilt and grief in Storyteller hit very close to home for me and I just.

Right after the crash, everyone looked to Travis to take care of Javi, even when he was still trying to process the fact that he had just watched his father fall out of a fucking plane. He dug up his father’s rotting corpse in order to get a ring to help Javi grieve and remember their dad. He spent months walking 7 miles in every direction every day looking for Javi. And after all that, Javi still died. Not only did Travis lose his father, but now he’s lost his brother for the SECOND TIME. To make it worse, Javi was safe, he wasn’t picked! But then Travis decided to protect Natalie, and from the looks of it, he was ready to take her place; he threw himself in front of the door behind her and stood with a knife at his throat (for the second time oh my god these girls). I missed it before, but Travis looked to Javi and whispered his name after the Hunt went after Nat, he asked Javi to protect Natalie when he couldn’t. And doesn’t that make it so much worse? Up until then, Javi had been running away from the violence. Travis asked him to step up and take care of Natalie, someone they both grew to love. Javi became just like his big brother, and he died for it.

Side note: Travis is a better man than me because if that was my sister trust and believe I’d have done more than send them on a guilt trip, even if I was starving!! Not to soft quote Queen Ramonda here but HAS HE NOT GIVEN EVERYTHING?! His dad died while helping the girls put on their oxygen masks during the crash, Javi died so that the rest of them wouldn’t starve. His whole family died saving the Yellowjackets! Ben didn’t eat Jackie OR Javi and he’s still alive and kicking and burning down cabins, our girls SICK AND TWISTED (said with love). Even in the Donner Party, they made sure they ate in separate groups so that families would not have to eat each other or watch as their loved ones were eaten.

Anyway, I’ve seen a lot of people harping on Travis for telling Van that they should all be ashamed of what they did, and god it makes me so upset. Y’all can excuse hunting your friends and cannibalism but not a grieving teenage boy lashing out after the murder of his little brother??!! Like, the first thing Travis did when he saw his brother’s body was try to untie his hands because he’s not an animal he’s just a kid, and then cradled him like a baby, only to have his body taken from him moments later to be dismembered and butchered.

As the youngest of the survivors, Javi was someone who, by normal conventions, should have been protected by the rest of the group. Of course Travis needs them to be ashamed of what they did, he blames himself for Javi’s death just as much as he does then, if not more!! Travis was supposed to protect him and he failed him!!

I understand that Travis is not a fan favorite by a long shot and Van is one of the most popular characters in the show, which might be skewing the perception of this scene a bit, but I think the people who are dunking on Travis here are missing the point a little? Yes, Van gave him some brutal honesty and was well within her rights to do so. However!! Travis also gets to be pissed at the Yellowjackets. The fact is: they absolutely SHOULD be ashamed, but they’re not. They fully COULD HAVE saved Javi, but they didn’t. Javi was not the one who drew the card, but he died anyway. Why was Javi’s life worth less than Lottie’s, who might have died on her own? Because they liked her more? Because he was more expendable? No matter how much you justify it, Javi did not NEED to die. None of it was fair. That’s the point, that’s the tragedy of it all!

Lottie Matthews really dropped the thesis of the show: “Is there a difference?”

It doesn’t matter if there was some supernatural entity out there who “chose” Javi to die, it would have happened anyway. It’s much easier to stand by and watch a boy drown than to do the killing yourself. They were starving, he was there. Even if the Wilderness chose, the Yellowjackets chose, too.

Circling back a bit, I also want to talk about the difference between the two instances of cannibalism on this show: how they’re similar and different.

When Shauna and Travis discover their loved ones bodies (both frozen might I add), they assume very similar positions, kneeling by their heads and touching their faces. Both of their death’s were caused by the collective inaction of the rest of the group. The person who takes the first bite was the person who loved them most, thus giving permission to the others to eat and spurring on the feeding frenzy.

Jackie was an accident, Javi was on purpose. When Shauna found Jackie, she screamed and was in denial, trying to shake her awake. Travis was almost completely silent, only whispering “I’m sorry” and cradling Javi’s head in his lap. They held onto Jackie’s frozen corpse for months so Shauna could grieve her, but they took Javi away from Travis after what couldn’t have been more than a few minutes. They ate Jackie whole like vultures, but they butchered Javi like an animal. The process of eating Jackie took a long time, almost three months from her death to consumption. Hell, she was slow roasted. With Javi though, “it all happened so fast” he was dead, cleaned, and eaten all within a few hours.

Shauna ate Jackie’s ear first. Jackie was driven into the cold by Shauna’s words. Travis ate Javi’s heart first. Javi went after Natalie because Travis loved her and because he loved Travis.

I’ve seen people say that the progression to the Hunt was too sudden and a result of bad writing but I’m going to have to disagree! Just from the parallels between Jackie and Javi’s deaths alone you can tell these writers know their shit. The Hunt has been teased since Doomcoming back in S1, the bloodthirsty side to the Yellowjackets has long been set up (Not!Tai eating Jackie’s face, Misty pushing Crystal, Shauna beating up Lottie). All season, we have seen various characters talking about eating another person multiple times (Misty and Crystal with the bone broth, Gen and Melissa about Crystal’s body, Mari and Misty both threatening Coach Ben), so they’ve had cannibalism on the brain for a while before they decided to Hunt. I’d go so far as to say the first signs of the Hunt were back in 1x01 with the girls icing out Allie for the greater good so they could win nationals. Them shunning Jackie solidified that the Yellowjackets were more than comfortable singling out and dehumanising one of their own, so long as the rest of the group deemed it necessary.

Cannibalism also is probably one of those things that gets easier the more you do it? Like they definitely would have Hunted and eaten Travis during Doomcoming if they had already taken the first step into cannibalism before then. Once they ate Jackie, all bets were off. The Wilderness “refusing” to let Lottie die was just a convenient excuse, they were hurdling headfirst into hunting their friends for sport looooong before then.

All this to say the Season 2 finale destroyed me and these are only Some of my thoughts about it. I’m not even TOUCHING the Natalie stuff yet.

[cairavende]

Worm Arc 19 thoughts:

Hopefully this is the only time I have more than a month wait between arc recaps. I was distracted.

Not a long arc really, but god damn did a lot happen.

My daughter is no longer eaten . . . ate . . . aten . . .

My daughter is no longer inside of a creature. That's good. Even though I was obviously 100% fine at the end of arc 18. I'm just more fine now.

Big props to Weld for just going swimming in a giant flesh pool and pulling people (and dogs!) out. He's an ok guy.

Based on the weird "dreams" Skitter was having while inside Echidna I am running on the assumption that the clones are pulled from alternate reality versions of the consumed person where said person had died. Well, not the clones themselves really, but the powers of the clones (and possibly their personalities/memories). Not sure it will end up mattering, with Echidna being dead.

But basically I think the dreams were partially visions of alternate realities.

I've been on the "alternate realities are gonna play a big role and are tied to powers and everything" boat for awhile now, but this arc finally brought that all to the forefront of everything. Just with Scapegoat and Scrub's power, clone Eidolon's powers, the door, and such. So that's cool!

Speaking of Scapegoat, I love his ridiculous little power. I saw it coming the second I saw the name and I was enjoying every second of it.

"She’s fucking blind!?" has gotta be one of the best moments in Worm so far.

Skitter finally realizes that Tattletale has been very clearly taking actions to portray her as the leader to everyone else. Cause bad ass lesbian super villain trio is everything.

Skitter hard carried the second Echidna fight. Everyone would probably be fucked if she wasn't there.

Starting off with taking out the teleporter Grue clone. My girl knows rule number 1. First, GEEK THE MAGE!

And of course she was using her bugs to monitor the entire battlefield, but then she starts giving information and direction to everyone. Kept track of clones, preventing any (hopefully) from escaping). And taking out a fair share of them herself!

Fucking just full on use swarm speech to speak to everyone across the battlefield at once! FUCK YES SHE IS BADASS!

I'm sure Shatterbird won't show up again and isn't going to be an issue at all!

And she's the one that sets up the trap to cut Echidna in half and contain clone Eidolon so Miss Militia can take him out! Clockblocker gets partial credit for helping I guess. But still, Skitter saved all their asses 10 times over.

Also Clockblocker is obsessed with my daughter. Kid has it baaaaaaaad.

I love that in the first few chapters there is some teasing of Cauldron's secrets being spilled a little bit, then Legend completely reveals that Cauldron exists but lies about details, and then suddenly clone Eidolon just dumps everything out there!

Faultline and crew - "We…worked on finding info on Cauldron for a year…and…he just…he shouted it out."

And through all of this Tattletale just out here like "I'm gonna tear a hole in reality!" God I love this reckless chaos child.

Gully deserves to punch a few Cauldron people. As a treat.

Lisa "I took one look at you and instantly knew I would take over the fucking city just to see you smile" Wilbourn over here! GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!

SERIOUSLY IT'S SO GAY!

"OH NO LOOK AT THAT POOR TRAUMATIZED CUTE GIRL, I CAN FIX HER!" IS THE MOST LESBIAN THING

Real quote: "Maybe- maybe when the interuniversal trade takes off. Can you imagine? With me and you as the top dogs? The whole world will pay attention to us." HOW CAN SHE BE THIS LESBIAN?

CHATTERBUG CHATTERBUG CHATTERBUG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (SMUGBUG SMUGBUG SMUGBUG if you prefer)

THEY CAN RULE THE WORLD TOGETHER AND I WILL FORGIVE ALL WRONGS DONE TO REACH THAT POINT CAUSE GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!! (Also obviously Rachel will be there too.)

(I'm sure Taylor crumpling the papers from Dinah in her fists at the end of the arc isn't ominous at all.)

Blasto Interlude thoughts:

Sucks to be Blasto I guess

Accord is terrible as always, glad to see more of him. Love his minions.

Colin can't do anything right. Seriously dude you cut Bonesaw in half and still lost! You have magic cut through anything and turn it to dust tech and you couldn't kill her! God.

Dragon is hard carrying this SH9 hunting team.

She got Manton! That's crazy! Good job robot daughter!

I 100% do not expect Siberian to stay gone. I mean outright Bonesaw is gonna be cloning people and she can probably get some of his DNA. But even without that, it was just too convenient, happening off screen like that. I dunno. It's not safe.

Also Blasto, I'm really sorry about what happened to you but also you tried to make a half Simmy clone! God damn that was the dumbest thing you could ever have done. You are so lucky it didn't work (probably), cause if it did it would have been because she planned it. God damn.

Time for the Slaughterhouse 99 or whatever. Gonna really suck for people.

Parahumans Online Interlude thoughts:

Timeskip!!! Shortish timeskip but still! It's been so day to day for so long so suddenly jumping ahead was surprising.

Greg from act 1 is back! And also kinda a dick. And probably has a Thinker 1 power. Tattletale light basically. Fits with what Taylor said about him in act 1 too.

GstringGirl is probably Sveta, that feels right.

Glad to see the Case 53s making their own team, that's a good start.

WagTheDog wanting to work for Bitch is super cute! I'm glad it seems like that is going to work out.

Loved seeing some of the stuff of people talking about Skitter. I've been wanting to see what the general public has been saying about her cause from an outside perspective the stuff she has done seems 10 times crazier than it is, and it is already crazy.

Emma Interlude thoughts:

Fuck this bitch

Sure she went through a really hard situation and she has terrible parents and it is easy to see how she got to where she is, but that doesn't excuse her actions. I still don't like her at all.

I don't know how much more I need to say, except that Alan shouldn't have left his traumatized daughter home alone with the instructions "If you feel like doing something bad please call the therapist who's number I put on the fridge" christ dude. You are worse every time you show up.

Like learning that Alan knows everything about Sophia as well? Just makes him even worse! Probably upgraded from a 3 fire asshole to a 4 fire asshole by now.

[book-girl4evaaa]

Heathers thoughts none of you asked for :)

Ok y'all so I've been on a plane so obviously I downloaded heathers and I thought "you know what? Lemme write down my thoughts, because I'm pretty crazy about this musical." So I did. These are the aforementioned thoughts. Enjoy if you choose to :)

Content warning: spoilers lol

Trigger warnings: murder, sex, suicide, sexual assault/violence, depression, anxiety are all mentioned. Also there is a lot of cursing because a lot of the songs cuss lol (if you've already seen it then there's nothing else apart from what's already in there)

It's about 3000 words long, and probably quite funny to read even if you don't know what's going on

Um yeah that's it, let's go!

My thoughts on Heathers

ACT ONEEEEE

- "September 1st 1989, dearrrrr diary"

- (ok imma nerd out on the first line because September 1st 1989 could be a reference to September 1st 1939, but that's it I promise)

- welcome to my school, this ain't no high school this is the *thunderdome*

- "if I'm not dead by Juneeee" yeah about that-

- "then I can blow this town," um Veronica that's jds job

- "fight the urge to strike a match and set this dump ablaze" girl if you knew what would happen next....

- RAMS EXPRESSION HELP

- Life really isn't looking beautiful Veronica

- "smartest guy on the football team :0"

- "did you really just talk to me?" "My buddy Kurt just asked you a question" *nod/grunt/chest pop thing*

- (they are soooooo not straight)

- "dear diary: whyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?"

- BRO I THOUGHT THEY SAID "COLD BEEER" NOT "HOPE HERE" 😭

- Heathers' entrance giving vogue tbh

- "no discernable personality but her mom did pay for implants,"

- "id like them to be nicer," Martha ur so real for that

- so everyone is just going to ignore that line about kidnapping them? Ok...

- why does miss Fleming act so dismissive of one of her students having an eating disorder? Like ummmm safe guarding?

- chandler not even knowing Veronica existed till she saved her ass lmao

- FIRST SHUT UP HEATHER OF THE SHOW AYYY

- "if I took a meat cleaver down the *centre* of your *skull* I'd have matching halves.... That's very important :]"

- "ask me how it feels, looking like hellll on wheelsss... My GOD it's beautiful"

- THE RIFFS OH MY DAYS

- ok first song done :]

- "more like the heathers are my co-workers and our job is being popular and shit,"

- "but it's still the same me underneath!" "You sure? 🤨"

- "how very" !!!!!!!!!!!!!

- "heather. Bend over."

- "...are we gonna have a problem?"

- "LISTEN UP BIATCH"

- honestly playing dolls sounds more fun than smoking with some quarterback to me but like wtv

- "say goodbye to shamu"

- LET'S GO TEAR UO SOMEONES LAWN

- step into my candy storeeeëëëEEEEE

- honey what you waiting for... "SHUT UP HEATHER!"

- "don't just quote bodelare at me and walk away?"

- "I didn't catch your name..." "I didn't throw it 😎🔥" jd thought he ate

- "my buddy Kurt just asked you a question" "*huh*"

- "I'm not sure what your problem is, but I bet it's pretty hard for you to pronounce." Ok jd ACTUALLY ate this time

- holy shit (holy shit) holy SHIT (HOLY shit) HOLY SHIT **Holy Shit** HOLY shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit

- "why, when you see Boys fight, does it look so horrible, yet feel so riìïíîīïìight,"

- "DAAAAAAMN"

- girlypop is infatuated

- her posing with him while he's frozen is pretty iconic tbh

- "if your still alive," she knows the chances

- (also death reference (?!?!?!?))

- the ball popping scene 😭

- "come on admit it you like the new kid," says you heather? We alllll know that you like someone who's name starts with v

- duke looks so scared :'(

- "they will get me safely through highschool," ehhhhhh

- "I'm not gonna change, I promise," ehhhhh

- it's my candy store it's my candy

- it's my candy store it's my candy

- it's my candy store it's my candy storeeeeeEEEEEE

- (also the choreography is eating)

- "VERONICAAAAAAAAAAA 🦅 DON'T FORGET GET TO BUY CORN NUTSSSS"

- "plain or bq?" "BBBBBBBBBQQQQQQQQQQQQQQ 🦅🦅🦅🦅🦅"

- "greetings and salutations" fhhfsjsfdj

- "did you say cherry or lemon?" "I said big gulp,"

- "IF IT'S IN THE WAY, I'LL MAKE YOUR DAY"

- "example: I don't really like my friends." "That's ok, I don't like your friends either ☺️"

- ayyy liquorice is good for voices, I see you set team

- Veronica just watching him sing (she's still infatuated)

- "I pray at my alter of slush" that sounds like an unhealthy relationship with a drink bro

- "shfhjsgskdfsgsdg" - JD sucking up his slushie

- "freeze your brainnnnn"

- riffing so early in the song are we? Slay

- "does ur mommy know you drink all that crap?" "Not anymore. When mom was alive -"

- (Veronica's face kills me every time)

- "the sky's gonna hurt when it falls so you better start building some walls"

- JD casually traumadumping on some random girl at the seven eleven

- "I don't see what the big deal- SON OF A BITCH"

- chandler being jealous because of JD is peak

- freeze your brain is underrated though

- "sure thing.... DUDE"

- the middle fingers at their son's 😭

- DAD SAYS ACT YOUR AGE YOU HEARD THE MAN IT'S TIME TO RAGE

- everyone in this musical is so fine

- I'm learning this choreography as soon as I get time

- adding to the character profile that McNamara's mom is a slight alcoholic

- "a hot guy smiled at me without a trace of mockery!" Ronica is really doing well though, this is like goals, like bro I'm still waiting on this for me

- why's miss Fleming a teenager all of a sudden?

- she's got moves those

- "how did I get this popular?" Because the demon queen of highschool has a hugeeee crush on you

- "dreams are coming true when people laugh but not at you," Veronica is so me (I'm still waiting for this but oh well)

- ✊✊🙌✊✊🙌✊✊🙌✊✊🙌

- "I'm not alone I'm not afraid I FEEL LIKE BONO AT LIVE AIDDDDD"

- "I'm actually having big fun!"

- that poor pinata 😔

- dang dang diggity dangy dang

- even I know that sparkling ciders a "no thanks" at a party, Martha

- "there's no alcohol in this, are you TRYING to POISON me?" Yeah about poison...

- "our folks got no clue bout half the shit there children do!" Me when Tumblr-

- "pin-yah-tah!" (That's how I say it too)

- ok the bullying Martha at the party is pretty realistic

- "what's your damage heather?"

- "nobody at westerberg is going to let you play their reindeer games!"

- Lick. It. Up.

- no way to treat the love of your life, chandler

- but I don't own a motorbike -

- *wait...*

- here's an option that I like

- spend these last few hours getting ✨ freaky ✨

- "Veronica, what are you doing in my roo-" "shhhshshshhhhssshshshhh"

- him going to kiss her and she's just like 🖐️ onto his face

- he honestly looks a little scared

- "so worlds unfair, keep it locked out there" ummm you snapped off his window lock remember?

- "that works for me,"

- not her hitting notes after making out which I'd struggle to hit with a warmup ✋😭

- the confidence it takes to perform that song on stage-

- tbh if I had that nightmare I'd be terrified too

- "I gotta go kiss her arobasized ass"

- Veronica's so silly I love her

- I kinda want chandlers pjs

- "hope you brought kneepads, bitch"

- "that stuff would kill her!" "Thus ending her hangover,"

- not JD calling her chicken for not wanting to kill 💀

- ooooo bro didn't tell her

- heathers soooo jealous of JD

- "I'd actually prefer you did this [begged] on your knees," like um that's a bit... You know...

- "but your still dead to me" funny choice of words chandler

- THE FACT SHE DIED RIGHT AFTER

- "c-c-corn n-n-nuts XP"

- "my problems were a miriad..." "I was having my period. HAHAHAHAha.... OH MY GOD"

- (fun fact I drew that line)

- "I learned to...kiss boys with my tongue" "that's good"

- Veronicas face when heather starts singing

- "Ur making me sound like air supply 🙄"

- no but heather doing the little movements as she sings like it's a tiktok dance

- "my 🤘🤘 rockstar mystique they wouldn't dare look in 🫱😔🫲 my eyessss"

- "MYRIAD, NICE"

- "starving children eating sand"

- "no one thinks a pretty girl can touch youuuuu" "heather touching me 😏" WHAT THE HECK NOT THE TIME BOYS REALLY NOT THE TIME

- "IM BIGGER THAN JOHN LENNON"

- chandler doing the little boogie because people actually like her now she's dead

- duke getting her photo bomb moment

- "do you think heathers mom keeps her room the same, like she's alive?" "....well that rugs gonna need a good cleaning "

- DID JD'S DAD JUST THREATEN VERONICA WTH

- "my mom's cooking dinner....spaghetti.... With *lots* of oregano" iconic

- "Jd's dad will not be speaking at our wedding,"

- "nobody *cares* about your feelings" DUKE TAKE THAT BACK RIGHT NOW

- "from her homies 😔✊✌️" I love you heather McNamara

- ummmm McNamara, I love you but that isn't ok

- i m a r a t i n a t r a p c o r r e c t i o n i m t h e c h e e s e

- bro this song makes me very uncomfortable but it's really catchy

- why are they licking her hand 😭

- "cow manure " serves you right bastards

- "is that a joke?" "It is most definitely a joke " it was not a joke

- "I HAVE A NEW FAVOURITE COLOUR"

- "MOVE BITCH THIS IS MY SONG"

- the transformation is smooooooth

- chandler sticking her tongue out has me dying she's such a good character

- "PARTIES AT MY PLACE" WHOO HOO

- KURT AND RAM WHEN I GET YOU

- tf are they slutshaming her for something that didn't happen, bitches

-"allhailthequeeniweartheredthescrunchiesonmyheadyoucantrunyoucanthideiamacrimsontide"

- Also dukes voice is so pretty like girl sounds angelic

- WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM SHE'S LITERALLY SOBBING AND THEY MADE IT WORSE

- if I was in that sort of situation I would be sobbing so hard

- "our love is god"

- "your not alone" "your not alone" SOBBING.

- they're so cute yet so messed up

- why are the boys so gullible though like don't they remember literally earlier that day?

- unrelated but I would kill for a voice like any of these people (pun intended)

- then singing "our love is god" at different times because it means different things to each of them

- JD just acting all smart as he lies

- the gay look im dead

- "so do we just whip it out?" Bruh

- "I liked the tie..." "get the tie, get the tie," "my mom bought it for me 😏🫦"

- the matching underwear lmao

- "ur just unconscious, right ram?" WRONG

- "STOP BEING A DICK"

- "what the FUCK have you done?!" "I worship you ☺️🥺"

- Veronica home girl you sound terrified why are you still letting him hug you

ACT TWOOOOOOOO

- "Im going steady, mostly he's awesome, if a bit too rock and roll" BESTIE HES A LITERAL MURDERER

- "lately he's bumped off 3 of my classmates" EXACTLY

- "god have mercy on my soulllll" feel kinda bad for her here tbh like she's struggling hard

- "they were just 17" foreshadowing one of my favs

- "but now we'll never know...."

- "ok ur mad I get it," 👁️👄👁️ dude... you KILLED THEM?!? YOU CAN'T TAKE THAT BACK?!?!?!? LIKE YOUR HOT AND ALL BUT WHAT?!?!??!?!?!

- "ich lugë bullets? You lied to me," ich lugë literally means I lied

- "can they make you cry now?" "No, but you can..." Imma cry for the both of you

- "my teenage angst bullshit has a bodycount."

- "THEY WERE NOT DIRTY! *BAM BAM* THEY WERE NOT WRONG! *BAM BAM*"

- "I love my dead gay son 💅💃✨"

- "they just had ✨flare!✨"

- "IM TALKING YOU AND ME" *gAsP* "in the summer of 83" *gAsP* "........ THAT....... was one hell of a fishing trip,"

- THE GAY TIES <33333333333 I WANT ONE

- ok but let's be real Kurt and Ram were definitely at least bi you all saw the grunts

- "who's next?" Tf do you MEAN who's NEXT?!?!

- "I could underline some meaningful passages in moby dick iykwim..." "NoOoOoOOO!"

- "and then kaboom" oooh so he's got trauma

- 17 = the song that gets me sobbing

- "we're damaged, *really* damaged, but that DOES NOT make us wise"

- "we're not *special*, we're not *different*, we don't CHOOSE who LIVES or DIES" this song hits hard every time

- "lets be NORMAL! see bad movies, sneak a beer and watch TV..." She just wants to be a normal teenager let her have that please and thank you

- "that really blows," ummmmmmmm poor word choice

- "play some poker" the game that you lie in JD? Huh?

- ayyy we're getting some more chemistry now

- not the time for a makeout sesh

- "if I am what you choose," 😭😭😭😭😭

- "your the one I choose," but in the end neither can choose eachother so now imma cry myself to sleep

- "just stop talking " jdronica fans everywhere:

- AYYYYYYYY shine a light love it

- "did you have a brain tumour for breakfast? 🙄" "No I had oatmeal ☺️"

- "well fuck me gently with a chainsaw " THE QUOTE THE QUOTE THE QUOTE (no mother Teresa but but oh well)

- "I'm in love with this fat girl!"

- "Veronicas going to lady prison heheheh," shut up you prick

- Veronica no need to be a bitch about it, I know you want to protect her but bro

- "but I-" "bUt iiu-" heather chandler is dead funny

- ugh screw off miss Fleming you're making it worse

- CROUD INTERACTION GOES BRRRRRRR

- "whether to kill yourself or not is one of the hardest decisions a teenager can make," no joke bro, is that not common knowledge?

- shine a light is the exact stuff my school would pull if kids started committing suicide

- "STEVE! I'm ending our affair" Steve took it like a champ though

- I'm using the phrase "fan-fricken-tastic" whenever I can from now on

- the mood drop when heather said she wanted to kill herself was like 📉

- "and I'm like 'jesus I'm on the fricking bus again because all my rides to school are dead!'" they don't deserve you heather McNamara

- lifeboat is so real tho

- like that metaphor is so real

- heather McNamara is like dream role stuff

- "with people I know " not friends, because she doesn't feel like she has any friends anymore

- "are you saying westerberg is not a nice place?" Well yeah it sucks

- Martha looks so sad in the background

- "I don't patronise bunny rabbits?!"

- "I killed them!" No ur bf did but close enough

- shine a light reprise is literally me after 9:30 pm 🤡

- I'm probably sure they use tic-tacs

- "if everyone jumped off a bridge would you?" "Probably." Real

- "if you were happy all the time you wouldn't be a human being. You'd be a gameshow host" saved

- HOW MANY TICTACS DID THAT GIRL FIT IN HER MOUTH

- awwwww the hug is so cuteeee they have the best friendship dynamic

- (also people need to stop painting Mac as dumb, she's just naïve)

- "STOP TALKING OVER ME!" you tell him girl

- "I could make another son anytime I want," GO AWAY THAT'S AWFUL YOU A HORRIBLE TERRIBLE PERSON UGH YOU MAKE ME SICK I HATE YOU I HATE YOU I HATE YOU

- saved my aggression for him <3

- ok look I know he's a murderer but no-one deserves a parent like that, JD's shaking and he's like 17 this is not ok

- blud just shot a TV to take out his anger

- "I love the rush when you would hold me close but you will not be satisfied till I overdose" gnsgxcfzfzzggmsfs

- I SAY NOOOOOO

- "blame the life you neve had, but hurting people that's your choice my friend..." PREACH

- "but I love you!" Ur-ur pointing a gun at her. Dude.

- WAIT SHE ACTUALLY SAYS DUDE I FORGOT THAT

- "just in time I say nooo," um not quite

- "who's ready for the big game :D" such a vibe change

- why's the cheer chant so aggressive 😭

- "send you straight to hell!" They're highschoolers geez

- "nobody cares about Martha Dumptruck," I-i care?

- ok kindergarten is pretty good but the fact it doesn't rhyme makes me a little weird

- like it feels like a poem

- "some girls are meant to be alone," nooooooo

- she looks so happy like she's going to be free I'm going to cry :'(

- "we've been avoiding you because you're a terrible person" heck yeah

- "hmmmmm the plot thicknesssss"

- Chandler has the best lines

- yo girl is like anxiety but with ghosts

- "Veronicas running on running on fumes now Veronicas totally fried " same tune as Veronica open the door hehe

- knock knock 😃

- "BUT 🙌 BUT 🙌 BUT 🙌" he's so silly and murderous

- "BAM BAM BAM" JD should start a sound effects company

- even the way he says the chorus is eery

- no way he put "no thanks" on a suicide note 💀

- bro really wants to blow up an entire student body for one girl who doesn't even want him to

- (she said make this whole town disappear so he started at the school but she didn't mean it literally)

- "Veronica open the, open the door please" *intense tiktok flashbacks*

- ok but the swaying of her being hung was so realistic like whatttt

- I feel really bad for Veronicas mom here

- "noone here deserves to die except for ME and the monster I createddddd yeahhhh YEAHHHHH" devoured that high note

- HEADS UP JD IMMA DEAD GIRL WALKING 🗣️

- (the reprise is so much better fight me about it)

- (like sex 👎 homicide 👍)

- (could biased as an acespec but who gives a doughnut)

- "ONE LAST DANCE ABD THEN FAREWELL, CHEEK TO CHEEK IN HELL WITH A DEAD GIRLLLLLL WALKINGGGGGGG" awesome line

- ohhh the cheer chant makes sense now

- "I WISH YOUR DAD WERE GOOD I WISH GROWNUPS UNDERSTOOD" #mood

- "I wish I had more tnt" bruh

- she really brought a croquet mallet to a gun fight and won

- NO NO-ONE CAN HERE HER THEY'RE ALL GONNA DIEEEEEE

- "I still believe there's good in everyone," she's willing to die for them I'm crying

- "I am damaged" IM DEAD IM SOBBING I CAN'T ANYMORE

- IT'S REPEATING 17 BUT THIS TIME THEY CAN NEVER GET THE HAPPY ENDING

- "please stand back now. A little further,"

- "our love is god," "say hi to god" I'm a wreck now btw <3

- "you look like hell," "I just got back" SLAYYYYYY

- the parking of the mobility scooter got me ok. I have to be honest

- "my date for the pep rally kinda blew uuuuuuuuu - me off" that really blows Veronica

- "my friendddd" :') they're healing

- "if no-one loves me now, someday somebody will," awwwwww ok this is fixing me

- the overlap of beautiful and 17 works so well because there's so much hopeeeee

- BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFUL BEAUTIFULLLLLLL

- even the bows are good

Ok that's it now if you made it to here I'm impressed because that's about 3000 words :)

Byeee

[nightshadow1607]

Aizawa: I recognize that the HPSC has given an order, but given that it’s a stupid-ass order, I’ve elected to ignore it

--

Hizashi: Can you teach me how to hoe?

Nemuri: Rude

Nemuri: *sips wine*

Nemuri: But yes

--

Thirteen: What are you doing?

Snipe: Helping Majima find look for his box of cornflakes that I ate an hour ago

--

Young Hizashi: Welcome to my very first vlog in which I try different products

Young Hizashi: *sprays hairspray into his mouth*

Young Hizashi: Well, right off the bat, I can tell you this one is not very good

--

Aizawa: *wakes up after a power nap*

Aizawa: Did I die? Is this heaven?

*knocking*

Nemuri: Open up!

Hizashi: It’s us, Zashi and Nem!

Aizawa: Oh. It’s hell

--

Hawks: My demons are chasing me and they’re doing the Naruto run

--

Nedzu: I made tea

Aizawa: I don’t want tea

Nedzu: I did not make tea for you. This is my tea

Aizawa: Then why are you telling me?

Nedzu: It is a conversation starter

Aizawa: That’s a lousy conversation starter

Nedzu: Oh, is it? We are conversing. Checkmate *sips tea*

--

Hawks: When you’ve work in the Hero Business as long as I have, you develop thick skin

Best Jeanist: *walks passed by Hawks* Yellow is not your color

Hawks: YELLOW BRINGS OUT MY EYES, YOU PRICK!

--

Interviewer: Is stabbing someone immoral?

Hawks: Not if they consent to it

Mirko: Depends who you’re stabbing

HPSC PR Manager: YES?!

--

Recovery Girl: God give me patience

Yagi: I think you mean “give me strength”

Recovery Girl: If God gave me strength, everyone would be dead

--

Endeavor: I have no fears

Best Jeanist: What if you woke up one day, and All Might became Number One again?

Endeavor:

--

Ectoplasm: That’s it. It’m not getting into any more stupid debates with you

Snipe, examinating his gun: Earth isn’t a planet

Ectoplasm, exploding: How the FUCK is EARTH NOT A PLANET--

--

Thirteen: Whose turn is it to give the pep talk?

Majima: Not me

Vlad King: *sighing* It’s Aizawa’s turn

Aizawa: Fuck shit up out there but don’t die

Hizashi: *wiping away a tear* Inspirational

--

Hizashi: *screams* 

Endeavor: *screams louder to establish dominance*

Yagi: Should we do something?

Aizawa: No, I want to see who wins this

--

Nedzu: I am, as the kids say, awake

Nemuri: Don’t you mean woke?

Nedzu: Yes, but that is grammatically incorrect

--

Aizawa, holding a large box: What would you say if I came back one day with a box of nine kittens

Hizashi:

Hizashi: What’s in the box?

Aizawa:

Hizashi: Shouta, what’s in the box?

Aizawa: I think you know

--

Miruko: So you can fly, right?

Hawks, confused: Yes?

Miruko: Which means hypothetically you could backflip off the HPSC building

Hawks, eyes lighting up: I could!

Edgeshot, muttering: Not my circus, not my monkeys *leaves the room*

incorrect quotes because why not? (pro heroes edition)

[archduchessofnowhere]

Is it true that empress sissy was bad mother? Or just rumours

I think it really depends on what do you understand as being “a bad mother”. First of all royal women were not expected to be the main carers of their children: this job was divided among the many people in charge of the well-being of the kids. Parents usually only saw their kids little on a daily basis, since they did not even ate together. So one shouldn’t expect Elisabeth to have been changing diapers and heating milk bottles. The second thing to consider is just how young she was when she became a mother; giving birth to three consecutive babies in such a short time spam (with the additional stress of knowing everyone is expecting you to produce an heir) must have take a huge toll on her, so I don’t think is that surprising if she didn’t smoothly adjust to the role of mother.

Even so, she did love her children, as this letter she wrote to a Bavarian relative soon after the birth of her first child shows:

My little one really is already very charming and gives the Emperor and me enormous joy. At first it seemed very strange to me to have a baby of my own; it is like an entirely new joy, and I have the little one with me all day long, except when she is carried for a walk, which happens often while the fine weather holds. (Hamann, 1986)

But Elisabeth had no control in how her eldest children were raised: her mother-in-law, Archduchess Sophie, took charge of them. Something important to keep in mind, however, is that taking charge of them doesn’t mean that she personally cared them (again, this wasn’t the role of royal woman), but that she chose the staff of nursemaids, nannies, governesses and tutors that oversaw the children’s caring and later education. But this lack of control over her children ended up being a great source of sorrow for the young mother.

During this time the first big conflict between Elisabeth and Sophie arose: the children’s nursery was placed on the same floor as Sophie’s appartements, which meant that she could go over to see her granddaughters with a lot more of freedom than Elisabeth, whose appartements where on a different floor. Being on a different floor meant than she could only see her daughters during the times set by protocol, and always in company of her retinue of ladies and lackeys, which ended up limiting even more the time she could spend with them in privacy. She told to her lady-in-waiting Marie Festetics in 1872:

Only now do I understand what bliss a child means. Now I have finally had the courage to love the baby and keep it with me [her fourth child Marie Valerie]. My other children were taken away from me at once. I was permitted to see the children only when Archduchess Sophie gave permission. She was always present when I visited the children. Finally I gave up the struggle and went upstairs only rarely.

This statement comes from almost twenty-years after the events, so it should be taken with a bit of a grain of salt (in the first letter I quoted Elisabeth mentions that she had Baby Sophie with her “all day long”, so she wasn’t “taken away at once” as she claims here). The most important takeaway from this statement to me is that even after all those years the fact that she wasn’t allowed to see her girls freely hurt her. So it’s not surprising that her first act of “rebellion” at court was when she decided to move the nursery to her floor in 1856.

After successfully moving the nursery near to her appartements, slowly Sisi started to take more and more control of her children. At the end of 1856 Franz Josef and Elisabeth went on a state visit to Lombardy-Venice and they took Baby Sophie with them. This tour was relatively successful, and months later they tried to replicate its success on Hungary. For this tour the parents decided to take not only Baby Sophie but also Gisela, since it was planned to last two months and they didn’t want to be separated from their daughters for such a long time.

As it’s known, Baby Sophie sadly died of typhus during this trip. Although is often repeated that Archduchess Sophie blamed Elisabeth for the child’s death, she in fact was very sympathetic towards the young mother, since she also had lost an infant daughter and could understand her pain. But Elisabeth seemed to blame herself regardless, and soon fell into a deep depression that lasted months and filled her entire family with worry.

By the end of 1857 she showed signs of being pregnant again, and in September of 1858 she finally gave birth to the long awaited heir, Crown Prince Rudolf. And just as with her daughters, Elisabeth had no control over the boy’s upbringing.

In 1860 Elisabeth started to become ill - of what, nobody knew. I won’t go much into this (since that’s just an entirely different post), but by the end of the year, after exhausting all possible treatments, it was decided that the Empress should go away from court to recover from her mysterious illness. This was the beginning of Elisabeth’s two years trip - first to Madeira and then to Corfu. Franz Josef offered her to take Gisela with her, but since she couldn’t also take Rudolf (the heir had to remain in Vienna), she decided to leave her behind because she didn’t want to separate the siblings, who were very close (Winkelhofer, 2022).

Elisabeth returned a changed woman, much more confident in herself, no longer the shy girl who was easily intimidated by courtiers. But she still had no control over how her children were educated. Or that was until Rudolf started his formal education. At the age of six he was separated from his sister and governess, given his own household, and Count Gondrecourt was assigned as his tutor. Gondrecourt had the mission of “toughening up” the boy, since he was considered to be weak of mind; his method to achieve this consisted in psychologically torturing Rudolf, and after he fell ill, seemingly of a nervous collapse. When Elisabeth discovered what her son was going through she was horrified and decided to step in. So she did something almost unprecedented, not only for her personally, but also in general for a woman of her status: she gave her husband an ultimatum:

I wish to have reserved to me absolute authority in all matters concerning the children, the choice of the people around them, the place of their residence, the complete supervision of their education, in a word, everything is to be left entirely to me to decide, until the moment of their majority. I further wish that, whatever concerns my personal affairs, such as, among others, the choice of the people around me, the place of my residence, all arrangements in the house etc. be reserved to me alone to decide.

Even more surprisingly for the time, Franz Josef agreed, and gave her full control of the children’s education. Gondrecourt was dismissed and Colonel Josef Latour was personally chosen by Elisabeth in his place. Latour was highly unpopular at court because he wasn’t an aristocrat and had very liberal political ideas, but Elisabeth protected him and he kept his job. Latour ended up becoming a close friend to his pupil until his death. But even though she now had what she had always wanted, total control of her children’s upbringing, she never became really close to her eldest daughter and son.

This is the part in which we can talk about her being “a bad mother”. When you compare her relationship to her fourth and last child, Marie Valerie, born ten years after Rudolf out of her desire to have another baby, raised entirely by her (as always keeping in mind that this means she had full control of the staff that took care of Valerie), to how she was with Gisela and Rudolf, the clear favoritism is evident. It seems that she felt more distant towards the eldest, probably a combination of her not having a saying in their upbringing until they were older and her constant trips away from court didn’t help her to close the gap. Gisela, who was a very down-to-earth person, a lot like her father, doesn’t seem to have minded this (or at least she never showed it), but Rudolf always craved for a close relationship with his mother, which he never could truly have. He adored her and was always grateful for her intervention when he was little, but seeing how all his mother’s love and attention went towards Valerie made Rudolf jealous of his younger sister; because of this the siblings also never managed to become close.

Valerie ended up feeling overwhelmed by her mother’s love. Elisabeth was very emotionally dependent on her daughter and made her her constant companion and support, which isolated the girl from the rest of her family. Valerie adored her father and felt that her mother put her against him, and Elisabeth insistance in raising her as a Hungarian (Valerie’s mother tongue wasn’t German, but Hungarian) made her hate Hungary. She turned out to be quite different to what her mother had planned, and that was probably just the result of having so many expectations imposed on her since she was born. But even so Elisabeth loved her and only wanted her to be happy. And this is shown by the fact that (unlike Queen Victoria with her daughter Beatrice) she didn’t want her to stay by her side forever, but to marry for love and form her own family. So she supported her decision to marry Archduke Franz Salvator, who out of all her suitors was the least favorite (Franz Josef wanted her to marry the Crown Prince of Saxony and Rudolf Archduke Eugen).

So was she a bad mother? It’s complicated. She loved her children (and I do think she loved all of them, despite Gisela being often considered the “forgotten” child), fought to have control on how to raise them (which was unusual for the time) and when she lost them she deeply grieved them. But she couldn’t be the support that her son needed, and the child she did gave her constant love felt suffocated. Sometimes an answer isn’t as a easy as yes or not, and I think we should keep that in mind when looking at Elisabeth as a mother. I hope you find my answer helpful, and sorry if it’s too long!

SOURCES:

Hamann, Brigitte (1986). The Reluctant Empress: A Biography of Empress Elisabeth of Austria (translation by Ruth Hein)

Winkelhofer, Martina (2022). Sissi. La vera storia. Il camino della giovane imperatrice (translation by Federica Saccucci)

[therealdeathoracle]

Since people seemed to like my incorrect bsd quotes from my coworkers I decided to do another one with quotes from my friends

Atsushi: “Been ignored so much bitches call me terms and conditions.”

Akutagawa: “At least you get accepted no matter what.”

——————————————————————————

Kunikida: “Bitchboys! Wait what are they called? Dazai! Yes!”

Ranpo: “I'm going to start calling him that.”

Dazai: “You want to see the real bitch come out?”

——————————————————————————

Chuuya: “Ok I think I have a solution.”

*Explosion in the distance*

Chuuya: “Don’t worry about that.”

——————————————————————————

Atsushi: “That was before I realized he was my dad.”

——————————————————————————

Chuuya: “Fan-fucking-tastic just trying to enjoy my meal and god decides to show up!”

——————————————————————————

Ranpo to Fukuzawa: “Hey look! An old gay white man! That's better than an old white straight man!”

——————————————————————————

Kyouka: “Murder is fun, cool, and hip!”

——————————————————————————

Jouno: "I am going... to hurt something."

——————————————————————————

Akutagawa: "Don't tell me how to breathe!"

——————————————————————————

Dazai: "Want to know what they called me in college? Application Denied!"

——————————————————————————

Kenji: "Mom says its my turn with the brain cell"

——————————————————————————

Sigma: “Fyodor! Nikolai is grave robbing again!”

Nikolai: “Well it’s not like they need this stuff anymore!”

Fyodor: “He has a solid point, do you need help?”

——————————————————————————

Kenji: "This thanksgiving I’m thankful for Fukuzawa, Ranpo, Kunikida, Yosano, Atsushi, and uh... Kyouka. Yeah that’s everyone."

Dazai: "I really appreciate how I’m not on that list."

——————————————————————————

Chuuya: *Attacks someone for picking a flower off a bush*

Chuuya handing the flower to Dazai: “Here’s your flower back, freaking freeloaders.”

——————————————————————————

Jouno: “Hold that thought, it’s time for me to beat up Tecchou.”

——————————————————————————

Jouno: “Well time for me to fight Tecchou and kill some bad guys, and I’m all out of bad guys.”

Tecchou: “Oh shit!”

——————————————————————————

*During the ADA’s DnD game night* 

Kunikida: “Dazai, you can’t play a bard. We all know you’re just gonna fuck everything.”

Dazai: "THAT’S A LIE! I just want to hit someone over the head with a lute! Then I’ll fuck someone!"

——————————————————————————

Akutagawa: “Dazai is my personal favorite swear word.”

——————————————————————————

Akutagawa: “I’m like a battery, I’m never included in anything.”

——————————————————————————

Fukuzawa talking to himself when Ranpo is refusing to do work and Dazai hasn’t shown up yet: “Am I surprised? No of course I’m not I bet on it!”

——————————————————————————

Yosano: “Oh you don’t feel so good? I have a fix for that!”

Yosano: *Pulls out a gun*

——————————————————————————

Jouno: "I am very angry- *notices Tecchou nearby* HEY HE’S THE ONE WHO STOLE MY PANTS!"

——————————————————————————

Atsushi: *Panicking running through the ADA with a trash can that he accidentally set on fire* “NO ONE SAW THIS!”

Kunikida, Dazai, Yosano: “WE SAW THAT!”

——————————————————————————

Yosano: *Listing off what she ate today* “I’ve had cheese, crackers, vodka, and egg salad.”

——————————————————————————

Kenji: “I’m gonna do this all on my own!” *turns to Ranpo* “Help me.”

——————————————————————————

Yosano: “You son of a bitch!”

Ranpo: “HEY! DON’T CALL FUKUZAWA A BITCH!”

Yosano: “No I’m calling you a son of a bitch! YOU ARE ADOPTED!”

——————————————————————————

Kenji: *Angrily muttering affirmations to himself*

Yosano: “Is this toxic positivity?”

——————————————————————————

Dazai seeing Chuuya using corruption: “This is what gay panic is mothers and fuckers.”

——————————————————————————

Dazai: *Hands Akutagawa 4 cents he found on the ground*

Akutagawa: “I get to eat tonight!”

Dazai: *Takes back 1 cent* “No you don’t.”

——————————————————————————

Chuuya: *Sees Dazai flirt with some girl*

(What he tried to say) “Great now I’m sad and lonely.”

(What he said) Chuuya: “Great now I’m gay.”

——————————————————————————

Chuuya: “That’s kinda gay, not gonna lie.”

Dazai: “You sound kinda gay, not gonna lie.”

Akutagawa: “I have cheese, not gonna lie.”

——————————————————————————

Dazai: “This is not gonna go well.”

*2 minutes later*

Dazai sprinting down the street: “OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT!”

*2 minutes later*

Dazai: “I LOST MY KNIFE!”

——————————————————————————

Dazai: “What gender am I today?”

Atsushi: “12.”

Akutagawa: “32.”

——————————————————————————

Chuuya to Akutagawa: “What’s your opinion on the plan?”

Akutagawa: “Cheese is good.”

Chuuya: “That wasn’t the question.”

Gin: “But it’s the answer.”

——————————————————————————

Akutagawa trying to flirt with Atsushi after getting advice from Kenji on what he likes: “ONION! I HAVE AN ONION FOR YOU! TAKE THE ONION!”

——————————————————————————

Akutagawa: *Trying to show Dazai the new nice outfit Chuuya bought him*

Dazai: *Not even looking at him* “Nice.”

Chuuya: *Angrily* “It’s ok, we all know you hate poor Aku.”

Dazai: *Starts fake crying*

Chuuya: *Sarcastically* “Awww you gonna cry?” *Seriously* “GOOD!” *Leads Akutagawa away while telling him he looks great*

——————————————————————————

Chuuya: “Nothing says pride like dick.”

——————————————————————————

Akutagawa after someone was mean to Atsushi: “You don’t think you’ll end up in hell for what you’ve done, but sweetheart I’ll be seeing you there soon.”

——————————————————————————

Dazai: “I don’t care if you have a cunt or a dick, either way I’m gonna fuck both your mom and dad.”

———————————————————————���——

Ranpo giving directions to Kunikida after he got Fukuzawa and himself lost: “Look for someone dressed like it’s Halloween and someone dressed like a single dad.”

——————————————————————————

Kunikida: *Referring to Chuuya being drunk* “I think he’s in denial.”

Dazai: *Also drunk* “Nah he’s in da Amazon!”

Chuuya: *Absolutely wasted using his ability* “I am in da air!”

——————————————————————————

Akutagawa about Atsushi: “I love his heterophobia.”

Akutagawa: “I meant to say heterochromia.”

@stinkyme

[destinedfordiaperstories]

Sammy's Little Problem, Chapter 13

Chapter 12 here.

Sammy hesitates before getting into the car. Is she allowed to sit up front?

“What are you doing, Sam? Are you just going to stand there all day? Or you going to come to movie night? Sit up here with me!” Alyssa points to the front seat.

“Thanks Allie, I wasn’t sure if I was allowed.”

“Tonight’s not the night to worry about that, okay? I told you, tonight isn’t the night to worry about this morning, or the future, or anything. Tonight is to just have fun.”

Fifteen minutes later, Alyssa and Sammy walk into Alyssa’s parents house. “Hey guys,” Alyssa yells, “wow, something smells real good!”

“Hi honey,” Alyssa’s mom, Carol answers, “your dad couldn’t help himself, like always. He went crazy in the kitchen. Looks like there was an explosion in the kitchen. How are you Sammy, dear?”

“I’m going great, Carol!” Sammy says, giving her a hug.

“I’m so glad to hear it! Linds should be coming down any minute. She decided to take a shower a few minutes ago. Why she can never do it early, I’ll never understand.”

Sammy laughs, “I think I spent more time waiting for her than I ever did studying.”

“It wouldn’t surprise me!” Alyssa’s dad, Henry boomed, “how are you Sammy? You thirsty? We got your favorite Diet Coke, just for you!”

“I’d love one!”

Henry brings Sammy a cold can of Diet Coke as everyone goes into the family room, finding spots on the couch.

“Henry dear, can we skip football for just one day?” Carol insisted.

“Sure thing, that’s why I got YoutubeTV on my phone, so I can watch my game while you girls watch whatever it is you girls watch,” Henry chuckled.

“Hi Sam!” Lindsay screamed running down the stairs, “you ready for movie night?”

“You know it!” Sammy responded.

“Well I thought it was movie night, girls. Night being the key word,” Henry quipped, “but it doesn’t look like night to me, its barely dusk. I haven’t destroyed Mom’s kitchen all afternoon to not serve my girls dinner!”

“I am hungry,” Alyssa said, “and the day I turn down a meal from Dad is the day I die!”

As they walked to the dinner table, Sammy saw that Henry wasn’t joking about cooking all day. This made Thanksgiving day meals look tiny in comparison.

“I couldn’t decide what to make,” Henry joked, “so I didn’t decide. I just made all of it”

“Come sit by me, Sam. I want to talk to you!” Lindsay demanded.

For the next hour, Sammy and Lindsay were lost in conversation at they ate dinner. Gossiping about boys, talking about their favorite shows, and wondering if their nerdy math teacher would ever make a move on Ms. Green, the science teacher.

Alyssa watched Sammy, taking it all in. This is exactly what she hoped for. Sammy had completely forgot about this morning, engrossed in conversation with Lindsay. At least for tonight, Sammy could just be Sam. Though Sammy was flying through those Diet Cokes. Alyssa hoped that the two stuffers she secretly added to Sammy’s diaper would hold up. The last thing she wanted to do was remind Sammy about that.

With dinner finished, everyone shifted to the family room to watch the featured presentation, Mean Girls. Unsurprisingly, Henry told everyone that he’s clear the dishes. But the sound of the football announcer’s could just be heard.

“Mean Girls was the perfect choice, Linds.” Sammy said, sitting next to Lindsay, “you’re right, Tina Fey is definitely a comedic genius.”

Sammy and Lindsay continued to chatter throughout the first hour of the movie. Carol laughed, wondering how the girls were barely paying attention, but still managed to quote every line of the movie as they happened.

Lindsay watched as Sam’s eyes grew heavy, cuddling up next to her. She could tell Sam was definitely struggling to stay awake. But, at the same time, she felt a wave of love for Sam as she tried to stay awake. She, like everyone else—but Sammy—knew what this night meant. Knew that this was the last time she’d ever watch Mean Girls with Sam.

“Come cuddle up with me, Sam,” Lindsay said, pulling Sam against her.

Sam looked up at her, smiling. Tired, but content. “Thanks, Linds, this is super comfortable.”

Lindsay looked down at Sam as her eyes grew heavier and heavier, running her fingers through her hair. Sam was grinning as she fell asleep.

Lindsay looked over at Alyssa, eyes full of tears. “Do you think she had fun tonight, Allie?”

“I know she did, Linds,” she responded, sniffling as she fought back tears, “thank you for this. I know she’ll always appreciate you being there for her tonight. I know everything’s gonna be changing soon.”

“When can I came see her next?”

“Give her a few days to adjust. I know she’ll be happy to see you, but the next few days will be a big transition for her. We’re going to Littles’R’Us tomorrow to get her crib, changing table, car seat, diapers, and clothes. She’s going to be very emotional as everything changes. I want her to be a used to her knew routine before anyone else sees her.”

“I understand Allie. It’s going to be hard for me too, if you can believe it. But I know it’s going to be way harder for her.”

Lindsay continues to stroke Sammy’s hair as they continue to watch the movie.

Not long after, Lindsay wrinkles her nose. “Allie, I think its time to be a Caregiver…”

Alyssa laughs as the smell hits her nose too. I think you’re right. She gently picks Sammy up, trying not to wake her as she lays her down on the floor to change her diaper, glad Sammy slept through the whole thing.

Go to Chapter Fourteen.

[harlowsbby]

Fluff concept: Maybe Jack is having writers block in your home studio so you go and give him some words of encouragement 🥹

My baby love

“Where is he at?” You mumbled to yourself and looked at the time seeing it was almost 4 in the afternoon.

You’ve spent the entire day deep cleaning your house with Jack he said he’d be in the home studio for a few hours to finish up a few verses and unfinished songs but that was at 7am that morning.

You quickly finished platting your dinner which consisted of pasta noddles and meatballs, tonight was a easy meal type of night. Once you finished you went to the indoor studio Jack had built.

You smiled and traced all the pictures placed in the hallways. They were pictures of Jack and Yourself throughout the years and some of Jack with his family or You with yours. You stopped for a second when you came across your latest picture.

It was Jack standing behind you with his hands resting on your baby bump. You coo’d at the picture before placing your hands on your belly.

“We can’t wait to meet you baby girl.” To which she responded by a few kicks, you giggled and shook your head she was definitely going to be one smart cookie.

“Jack? Are you in here baby it’s dinner time.” You opened the door to the studio quietly just incase he was recording something.

“I’m over here baby.” His voice came from inside the booth. Once you made it fully inside you were met by a somewhat happy Jack.

His curls were a mess probably from him running his fingers through his curls due to him being frustrated. He looked as if he hasn’t slept in ages and he just looked overall drained.

“Hi baby how are my girls doing?” His attitude picked up a bit seeing you. When you were close enough he was able to place his hands on your belly before leaving a few kisses here and there.

“And what about my kisses? I am the one that’s carrying your little Princess for another four months.” You sassily spoke and tried your best to cross your arms over your chest but the belly in your way was preventing that.

“You know I couldn’t forget about my main girl now pucker up.” You puckered your lips out and Jack gave you a few pecks here and there before sitting back down again.

“What’s got you so stressed? And don’t say it’s nothing because I can see how tired you look.” You threatened him.

“It’s just I have to get this song done and sent to Drama and Neelam by tomorrow and I don’t know where I’m going with it, I don’t want to seem like some one hit wonder you know.”

His eyes grew teary, lately the blogs and articles have been calling Jack a one hit wonder or everyone’s favorite rapper as of last year. They’ve also stated how he’s quote on quote “disappeared from the scene.”

“Look at me Jack.” He sniffled but didn’t look up he hated whenever you saw him cry. “Jack please look at me.” You rubbed his back in small circles and eventually he looked up. His nose was red and his cheeks were a bit puffy.

You hated seeing him so upset especially since he’s been working himself out and trying his hardest. You knew him not winning any Grammys took its tole on him mentally but he’ll win one eventually.

“Jack, you’re no one hit wonder and I know lately you’ve been feeling a bit discouraged but trust me you can do anything you put your heart and mind to.”

Jack hated feeling this way but the pressure was on he wanted to make it known that he was here to stay and that he wasn’t some temporary rapper.

“You’re right baby.” You huffed “I know I’m right.” He rolled his eyes playfully at you and went back to writing some lyrics down but you stopped him.

“No you’re taking the rest of the night off you’re spending it with me because I’ve been missing you. I’ll text Neelam and tell her you need more time but for now you’re mine.”

He couldn’t help but to laugh. “Yes ma’am I’m all yours.” He saluted you and let you take him to the kitchen. The both of you ate in a peaceful silence after you were done eating he cleaned up and went to put a movie on for the both of you.

Jack sat behind you in the bed while you laid between his legs. The two of you were watching The Little Mermaid.

“I wonder if our girl is going to be a singer.” You sleepy asked Jack. “If she wants to be a singer I’ll support it but we’ll see what she’ll wanna be when she’s older.” You nodded and closed your eyes before dozing off into a peaceful slumber.

“Thank you baby for always taking care of me I appreciate you baby girl.” When you didn’t respond he sat up and noticed you were fast asleep, he chuckled and placed a kiss on the top of your head.

“Ima love you forever my little love bug.” He finished up the rest of the movie and rubbed your belly the entire time. Once the movie was over he managed to tuck you into bed and fell asleep shortly after.

[crepesuzette2023]

Paul McCartney, Celia Mortimer, Iris & Vi Caldwell & Mike McCartney: Sketches for a Coming-of-Age Novel.

All quotes from TUNE IN by Mark Lewisohn, except the last one.

[Paul] had two main girlfriends in the last weeks of 1962 and neither knew of the other. One was Celia Mortimer, 17, the strikingly attractive redhead from art school who designed her own clothes and was a big Beatles fan at the Cavern.

'In my first year at art College everyone was wild about trad jazz, but then word came up the hill that ‘things were happening’ at the Cavern; a few of us went down one lunchtime to have a look—and there were the Beatles. […] It was the first time anyone in Britain had the black polo neck, black corduroy, existentialist look. I instantly took their lead and started to make hip black corduroy things to wear.'

‘[…] Paul was attractive, intelligent, arty, all the things that appealed to me, plus he was good to be with: a genuine, gentle person who wanted to please. He was the complete opposite of John, who was snarly and grumpy and incredibly, incisively funny. Paul was the nice one. We started to go out, but things were still quite innocent. Because I lived some way out of Liverpool there weren’t many places we could go, except to sit in his dad’s front room or my friend’s front room, or the cinema—we saw the first James Bond film.’ EXOTIC NIGHTMARES

Paul’s other girlfriend was Iris Caldwell—Rory Storm’s witty, pretty, blonde sister; George’s first love; the 18-year-old daughter of Ma Storm, whose house, Hurricaneville at 54 Broad Green Road, was central to the Beatles’ late-night social scene.

‘He had a beautiful voice and puppy-dog eyes,’ Iris says, ‘and he was much more interested in me than I was in him. I wanted more than a tuppence-ha’penny guitarist of a Liverpool group.’ Iris’s professional dancing career had taken off: she was as busy as Paul, working summer seasons and London shows and touring around the country; they could only see each other when their diaries dovetailed, and just as Paul was with Celia when Iris was out of town, she was secretly going out with Frank Ifield. […]

Iris always knew that a big part of the attraction for anyone going out with her or Rory was the chance of extended time at Hurricaneville, to hang longer around her dad Ernie and especially her mum, Vi. […] ‘Mum never chucked anyone out,’ Iris says. ‘We were all late-night people apart from me dad, who the Beatles called the Crusher because he had exotic nightmares and ate household objects.’ […]

Mary had been gone for six years this October, and Vi Caldwell was one of the women who tried to fill the breach. ‘I was practically a mother to Paul,’ she said without boasting. She made him food and drink, took his stage-soaked shirts and washed and ironed them, and shared easy intimacies. ‘Paul used to like her combing his legs,’ Iris says. ‘He had really hairy legs and he’d come in from the Cavern all tired, roll up his trousers and she used to comb his legs. How ridiculous can you get? But he adored my mum and my mum adored him.’

Vi recalls: ‘Paul was very temperamental. He would come on occasions and would be terrifically friendly and down-to-earth, and on other occasions he would come and be rather aloof and we wondered if we had offended him, as if he was thinking ‘I’m being too friendly so I’ll keep you in your place.’ That was our impression.’

THRILLING IN A DIFFERENT WAY

[Paul] was without the others, but with Celia Mortimer…and a new song. It was Tuesday/Wednesday 23/24 October [1962], the Beatles’ sole two-day break of the year, and Paul decided to leave his car at home and have an adventure: he and Celia hitch-hiked to London to see Ivan Vaughan. Paul loved hitching: he enjoyed chatting to strangers and seeing himself in an observational role, but he’d only done it with George or John, never with a girl. Celia—intelligent, chic, a pretty redhead—made it thrilling in a different way. And it was to see the brilliant Ivy, his Institute mate and John’s boyhood pal. […]

The new song was I Saw Her Standing There, though it had no title as yet. Its melody and structure skidded into Paul’s head late on Monday as he drove back from a Nems Enterprises Showdance in Widness. This was a sophistication of delivery had never experienced, inspiration so excitingly hot that when he got to Hurricaneville he grabbed an acoustic guitar and started working it out. […] It was truly a magical moment for Rory Storm, who’d never seen anyone write a song before. Vi and Iris would always maintain that he asked Paul if he could have it, exclusively, and Paul said yes—but as Rory didn’t have a record contract it’s unclear why he asked and Paul may have said yes only to regain some necessary peace and quiet.

Celia: ‘We had an amazing time, just wandering the streets in the sunshine, looking at London, holding hands and having fun, and Paul had the melody of what became I Saw Her Standing There going round his head all day, humming and singing it and fleshing out the words. […] He said, ‘What rhymes with “We danced through the night?” and I came up with ‘We held each other tight’, which was really quite naff, but he used it.’ BACK TO McCARTNEY-LENNON

However, the song was completed only when he had a front parlour session with John at 20Forthlin Road. They tried out little bits on Jim Macs Nems piano but mostly used guitars, working ‘eyeball to eyeball’ just like when they’d first written together here as schoolboys. Mike took photographs of them sitting by the little tiled fireplace—important historic images, the only such photos ever taken—so here we see these two sharp ambitious tuned-in young man looking down at an old Liverpool Institute exercise book in which Paul has written the words, complete with plenty of crossings-out. John is wearing his black horn-rim glasses and playing his Jumbo Gibson, Paul is playing a cheap Spanish acoustic of unknown history. Another original, a McCartney-Lennon one, is taking shape right here, right now. BIG PLAYER CELIA AND THE OTHER McCARTNEY BOY

Celia Mortimer’s relationship with Paul ended in the last weeks of 1962. ‘As the Beatles spent more time in London, Paul was there and not in Liverpool so much, and our situation just fizzled out. There was no time for it.’ She went on to become a big player on the London fashion scene, with her own label and studio on Great Portland Street, just a long from where she spent a few hours with Paul in 1962. In between times, she went out for a long time with Mike McCartney and was part of the Liverpool poetry scene.

Mike (a Ladies’ hairdresser at the time): MY FIRST LOVE AND BOB 'FOLK RUBBISH' DYLAN (from The Macs, 1981)

One day my first real love, after mum, walked into the salon; she was one of a group of models posing for the Daily Post and Echo. I was brushing up the hair as it cascaded endlessly down on to the floor. I wasn't exactly the brushing up which excited her, it was the way I did it (isn't it always?). The brush was balanced, she later recalled, on the end of my index finger, the furthest point from my body and, with absolute disdain, I followed it across the shop floor.

Not being a Post and Echo model at all, but in truth a hungry student plying her body for money, she returned for the free evening classes where she became my model, and I discovered that her name was Celia. From a model customer she became a model model, and from a model model we became a model couple.

She was the first woman I gave myself to, and she gave herself in return. In her Husky Street flat we got lost in each other's body and mind; we swam together through many Liverpool 8 late nights and often into the morning, when she would get up to cook breakfast and put on records. I would just lie there, male chauv-like. One morning she kept playing a particular album which didn't impress me.

'Who's that Ceel?'

'Someone they keep playing at college . . . Bob Dylan.'

'Never heard of him.'

'Neither had I, but after a while he's quite good.'

"Ceel—my first real love (after Mum)." Photo by Mike McCartney.