#my damn mind.
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'fun' childhood memory time again:
when I was a kid, maybe 6 or 7, my mother and I were out riding our bikes together (I think that was unusual in itself). we were outside our village where there were fields and nothing else. then the path in the direction we were going in was blocked by a 'private road' sign that said you weren't allowed to go that way.
my mother said we'll go anyway (which would absolutely be fine, everyone does that and no one would mind - which I know now). I said we can't because that's not allowed. she insisted we go anyway, and I broke down crying because I was so scared and horrified. I had no idea where we were exactly but I was so upset that I turned around and went home on my own when she refused to go another way.
that's still a funny story she likes to tell sometimes (about how I was such a little governess who wanted everyone to always follow her rules). because it's sooo normal for a small child to have a breakdown over that (I couldn't stop crying the rest of the day because it scared me so much). because if a child reacted that way in front of me I would not think 'oh you're so bossy, you always want to get your way', I would think 'this child is so anxious that she can't do something completely fine and normal because a fucking sign says it's not allowed'.
or the time she told me to go to the dentist with her instead of going to school and I cried for hours (I had to go with her, she said so. but that's not allowed and I will get in trouble and I will have to lie about it and lying makes you a bad person). or literally dozens of other examples like that. it's probably unfair but I really do resent my parents for never realising/caring that that is not normal, and getting me the help I clearly needed (because now I'm 32 and just figuring out that that's not how other people feel and getting help is hard and scary).
#like I really just thought. everyone always thinks about everything this way#and that they're just much better at hiding it#but apparently they're not!#and now I will do something fun and not let myself think about this anymore because that did not end well last time.#it fucking sucks that this topic is the hardest to think about. because how do I tackle any of this if just thinking about it makes me lose#my damn mind.#personal#(ugh. still thinking. like.. how could they not realise that it isn't normal for a 4/5 year old to have horrible nightmares about her#grandma's house exploding. every. night. and that it would be my fault. because we got those little doll thingies in kindergarten that we#were supposed to tell our worries to and then put them under our pillow. so I had to tell them that I was worried about that. but if I#thought I did it the wrong way that'd just make the nightmares worse because obviously then it would definitely happen and it'd be my fault#because I didn't do it right. like HOW could anyone think that's totally fine and normal if it doesn't go away ever???)
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I Can’t Help But Wonder
Odysseus, who just violently and mercilessly murdered 108 or so men, who claims in the next song that he’s no longer a kind or gentle man, actively listens to Telemachus and kindly and gently responds to everything his son’s expressed.
Telemachus asks, “Am I like you? Am I strong like you? Will you embrace me? Will you love and accept me as yours?” He says, “I’ve felt so alone.”
And Odysseus claims him in a heartbeat, answering, “My son. My boy. My sweetest joy I’ve ever known. I embraced you twenty years ago. I’d do the impossible for you. I’d die for you.” He says, “Seeing the men here today, I can only wonder what you’ve been through for twenty years. My son, you’re already strong. You’re my own. You’re not alone. I’m home.”
And then they fucking embrace.
#don’t mind me I’m just over here sobbing#something something Odysseus being an attentive loving father drenched in blood#the way he literally responds to everything#he says ‘you are MY SON I’ve never stopped embracing you’#‘I may be deranged and unhinged after years of torment but I’ll be damned before I let you think you’ve ever been unloved by me’#the instrumentals reflect it too#Tele’s piano is hesitant and very faint during his part overwhelmed by Ody’s guitar#the moment ody starts singing the piano blends immediately#Ody’s got open arms for his son#epic the musical#epic#odysseus#epic odysseus#epic telemachus#telemachus#epic the Ithaca saga#the ithaca saga#ithaca saga
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gideon & harrow OR rd and sf as cowboys please please please
It's the cowgirl necro and her gunslinger cav! Who is so damn extra she's got three guns: one left, one right, and one in pole position! (She swears the ladies love it!)
#You just KNOW gideons makes tons of these 'is that a gun or are you just happy to see me' jokes#She holds the third gun in her mouth#looking so damn stupid but grinning like shes the coolest lmao#how are you even going to shoot girl#also: the paint has to get onto the skin somehow#hmm. lot to think about...#that was such a fun prompt dear ! I ended up enjoying this waaaaay too much <3#gideon nav#harrowhark nonagesimus#I'm not gonna tag it griddlehark but in my mind this IS griddlehark - because this outfit would make Harrow go insane lmao#not that she'd ever let griddle take one step outside looking like that if we're talking serious#but it's a look - a look I LOVE#tlt#the locked tomb#my art#requests
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THE PARALLELS.
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preparations
based off this post by @letsplaythermalnuclearwar :)
#how to manage your captain: leash him like a damn dog#hope you dont mind the tag#if you end up seeing this. is your pfp a donnie themed vape#my twin is very interested in the rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#my artwork#art#sketch#i dont really like the art on here though#epic the musical#the odyssey#odysseus#eurylochus#epic the thunder saga#tagamemnon#greek mythology
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How much longer 'til your luck runs out?
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#jiang cheng#wei wuxian#Aaargh...I have so many thoughts about this scene.#This is a hard goodbye. I'm not your burden to bear. Not anymore.#This is the culmination of years of miscommunication. There was so much love there. They trusted each other with everything once.#I think it is easy to hear the anger in JC's voice and consider him the aggressor in this but listen to the words not the tone.#It is anger yes - but it is an anger born out of love.#Jiang Cheng wanted him to live - damn the rest of the world to hell if that's what it took. And Wei Wuxian chose strangers over him.#Sometimes two people who once flourished together become each other's worst wounds.#A goodbye to someone you once would have done anything for is a wound you don't easily recover from.#Jiang Cheng could have stood at Wei Wuxian's side and joined him. Consider though; as a sect leader his life is not his own anymore.#JC cannot just abandon the fledgling New Yunmeng Jiang without also dooming people.#And that is the lynch pin of it all. Both of them are trapped by duty. And the older they got the more tangled the web became.#The song I linked (Hi Epic fans) is such a good JC and WWX song that doesn't fit this scene exactly#But it does fit *them*. The words of warning that go dismissed. The Tactical Genius who continues to press on.#The seeds of doubt that grow louder until they creep towards mutiny. Ultimatly this *is* a mutiny! It *is* betrayal!#'You rely on wit and people die by it'. Is that not Wei Wuxian?#Just smashing my brainworms together over here. Don't mind me.
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Ratio is the one who posted the photo, I know, believe me-
#doodles#my art#honkai star rail#aventurine#dr ratio#veritas ratio#damn I love cakecats sm omfg#for some reason I have the feeling that Aventurine snores when he sleeps and Ratio is always two steps away from getting him out of bed.#this is shitpost don't mind me#hsr#ratiorine#aventio
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The nightmares in FNAF 4 get crazy...
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#michael afton#nightmare bonnie#nightmare chica#nightmare foxy#nightmare blunt rotation#fnaf 4#fnaf fanart#THIS IS SO UNSERIOUS#GUYS LISTEN I got this idea right before I fell asleep one night#like my mind combined the pieces together#and I just knew I’d have to draw it out#LIKE NO MATTER how dumb this pun is I had to let everyone know it#THIS IS THE OFFICIAL nightmare blunt rotation#it literally doesn’t get more of a ‘nightmare’ than this#Michael’s dreams weird af guys#this is the REAL ‘nightmare gas’ William Afton used#TBH I love the nightmares especially in this art#I didn’t know the nightmares were chill like that.. damn..
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really specific hangups
[ids in alt]
#in stars and time#isat#poorly drawn isat#isat siffrin#isat mirabelle#isat bonnie#isat isabeau#isat odile#isat loop#odile saying 'sorry siffrin you showed vulnerability so we have to kill you now' arose in my mind unbidden#and this comic was the result.#ended up losing the third panel and had to redraw the whole damn thing.#i think the possibility of one of the characters just laying out a perfectly timed f-bomb is hilarious to me.#it doesnt matter which one. literally any of them would be funny.
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i hate perspective. happy new years also
#i wanted to do something with j as a new years post but didnt have the patience to actually get it done#so instead i just went with what i was already drawing#nuvi nuvi nuvi nuvi nuvi nuvi nuvi#finally i've been able to draw this robo god damn ship#it has been clouding my mind for MONTHS#and i've finally been able to draw it#trying to color and slightly shade for the first time in. a while#violentbitingbiscuits#nuvi#nuziv#theres five hundred names for this ship dude#can you fandom people get it together and just settle on one#drew half of this last night and the other half today and surprisingly did not hate what i got done yesterday#amazing. can my mind do that for all my other art instead of despising it once a 5 hour timer is up#murder drones#murder drones uzi#uzi doorman#murder drones n#serial designation n#murder drones v#serial designation v#i love the concept that uzi crumples like tissue paper when given any affection#v pfp is an old sketch i dont think i posted on here dont mind it
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SEBASTIAN STAN
Monday (2020)
Dir. Argyris Papadimitropoulos
#sebastian stan#monday#sebstanedit#marvelcastedit#sebastiansource#gif#mcuchallenge#fyeahmovies#filmgifs#chewieblog#tvandfilm#dailyflicks#dailymenedit#dilfgifs#mancandykings#flawlessgentlemen#userstream#dilfsource#usersavana#usertammy#usersvenja#unearthlydust#userlaurianne#userchristineb#underbetelgeuse#gaybuckybarnes#userkk#i finally found the fucking remux version of this movie; there were only smaller files with lower quality ughdgf#oh mickey you're so fine you blow my mind#look at those damn arms
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taking turns
#a little environment practice :) i used to draw a lot of offices and desks for my old job so this is stretching my env muscles lol#arcane#jayvik#jayce talis#viktor arcane#jayce arcane#my perspective is kinda wonky but no it isnt.#my gay ass could never be viktor 10 years lab partners id lose my god damn mind#my art#clip studio paint#league of legends#GUYS IGNORE HOW I REUPLOADED THE IMAGE I HAD TO FIX SOMETHING IF YOU SAW THAT NO YOU DIDNT
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happy new year!!!! heres a batch of memes i drew last night while watching knives out on call with my friends and getting increasingly more and more wine drunk <3
edit: NO ONE TOLD ME THAT I FORGOT TO DRAW FOURS FUCKING EARS IN THE SECOND FILE OH MY GODDDDDDD ITS FIXED NOW ITS FIXED
#god. how an au containing 9 of the same gd twink enraptured me mind and soul i wouldnt know.#linked universe#linkeduniverse#lu wild#lu time#lu warriors#lu sky#lu twilight#lu hyrule#lu legend#lu four#lu wind#my art#if youre seeing my tags disappear and reappear its because the post isnt showing up in teh damn tags#so im troubleshooting.#ITS NOT FUCKING WORKING
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probably will be FORCED by Pomp And Circumstance to go to the CLOWN HOSPITAL, for a CLOWN INJURY (may or may not be An ALLEGEDLY Fractured Foot...a MOURNFUL MALADY incurred in the most PATHETIC and LAPSIDAISICAL Fashion of TRAGICALLY UNFASHIONABLY Events......
Anyway. Forgot what I was saying. Buy me 1/25th of an x-ray or whatnot I guess
#ASK ME#ASK ME HOW I ALLEGEDLY BROKE MY FOOTSIE BONSIES!!!!#shall come up with a different answer EACH time and they shall ALL be curious concerning and browraising#no but really ASK ME i have SO. MANY. ANSWERS.#(the actual answer isn't even mundane if anything it is...Up There.)#(my personal curse is the inability to give a straight answer Even And Especially when the actual accurate answer is funnier!#sometimes the actual truth of the matter is funnier! life just works like that occasionally!!!#and still it is my duty--my god calling--to decieve#anyways an object fell on me or I fell on an object. that object maybe or may not be a planet. or may or may not be an undisclosed oblong.#or both. or neither. mind your business before i suck your tax evaded beeswax right under you#...i May be slightly loopy on the adrenaline aftermath of (ALLEGEDLY) breaking some damn bones#I'm cranky and i want to hobble to the kitchen to Procure some Frozen Breakfast Food#and yet i am bound to bed for the sake of Elevating The Limb#I Am Basically Tantalus Do You Comprehend I Am Tantalus I Am A Tortured Mythological Figure And You Are Standing By Like Impotent Cupbearer#s#YOU ARE AN IMPOTENT CUPBEARER AND I AM PROMETHEUS SCREECHING AS MY INNARDS ARE WOVEN INTO STATEMENT ART#......motherfricker my ice pack is leaking
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finally beat dark gaia today, had to draw werehog about it
#i fucking love this game i hope i will never have to fight that gaia bitch again#maybe if theyd release remaster... but if they include tornado defense im bending their knees backwards#me doing colossus vs dark gaia fight for the first time thinking thats it then i see S rank is for 7 mins 30 sec like uhm.uhhmmmmmmm Concer#sonic#sonic unleashed#sonic the werehog#sonic can have some feral goblin time. as a treat#night stages > day stages i dont take criticism#gonna love forever the fact that werehog form doesnt affect his mind#all werewolf traits are pure act hes acting like a wild animal on purpose#he'd growl at you then be like hiiiiiiiiii :3#the absolute theater legend#what a fuckign creature of him. toddler sized beast. got damn gremlin#also frontiers and unleashed both my fav sonic games that have a little guy sacrifice themself at the end. why are you doing this to me
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i think you’ve already lost, dear detective
#mizuan#mizuki akiyama#an shiraishi#project sekai#prsk#prsk fa#colorful stage#vivid bad squad#vbs#25ji#25 ji nightcord de#nightcord at 25:00#cat’s art#do i tag this as shuake??#shuake#p5#persona 5#they were the ref so. uh#every night i be like ‘damn i miss p5r’ and then i don’t start my ng+ file#p5r is still on that pedestal on that mind idk i just want to experience it over and over again because the first time was so good#just like when i read p4 for the first time like AOAOAOAOAOOAOAOAOAUGHGHH
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