#my cube garden grows

[obsidianobelisk-fr]

Luckiest Day Ever!!!

I have obtained THREE more equilateral obelisks!

[the-devils-angel]

Through His Eyes

pairing: Matt Murdock x gn!reader (pre-established relationship)

warnings: none. just some fluff and like two seconds of angst.

a/n: some of my writing from over a year ago which I edited a bit. I totally forgot I used to write Matt Murdock fanfics for my friends in 2023.

Your eyes tightly squint closed, lashes pressed against your cheeks. Your nose scrunches up, pointing up toward your furrowed brows. A smile overcomes your features, teeth showing your happiness.

You're sitting on the hard floor, the soft carpet the only barrier between your legs and the chilly wood. Across the coffee table from you, leaning against the couch, is none other than Matt Murdock, your boyfriend.

Lately, you've been trying to see the world more through his eyes, well, in a way. When out in parks, you sit on a bench and close your eyes, listening to every sound around you and trying to guess where it came from or what made it. Sometimes, you visit your favorite garden, a beautiful place filled with the most gorgeous plants, and smell everything. You try to distinguish the different types of flowers, finding it easier the more often you go.

But your favorite thing is to lay with your head on his chest. You curl your arms around him, holding him tightly against you and keeping his warmth trapped in your embrace, and listen. His heartbeat is the most calming sound you've ever heard. Any time you find yourself in peril, freaking out about something, all you have to do is take a moment, close your eyes, and echo the memories of the steady thumps in your mind.

Every time you do something like this, you feel more near to him, and that's all you want. You want to get closer to the mystery of Matt.

The tip of your finger glides over the dice, causing a laugh to bubble at the feel. You mentally count the divots and trace around the carved circles. Feeling where the patterns lay on the cube, you finally decide their number before opening your eyes.

You grin at the victory of guessing the correct number. You've missed a few, so you're pretty happy you've gotten it right. But to be fair, Matt is distracting. That's your excuse, and it's an extremely valid one, too.

"Yes." You quietly cheer under your breath, huffing the word through your teeth as if he won't hear it.

Matt chuckles lightly, an adorable grin softening his features, "What're you so happy about?" He questions a bit teasingly before taking a small swig of his beer.

See, you haven't told him what you've been doing. You don't know if it's weird or creepy, so you're not exactly sure how you're supposed to tell him. But he can spot a lie from a mile away, maybe more, who knows?

"Happy I guessed the die roll right." You shrug, still trying to worm your way out. You reach your hand forward to give you something else to do, gripping the game piece and starting to move it the rolled amount of spaces. The rhythmic clack of the plastic against the board distracts you, bringing your focus off your weird new habits and back to the game.

"That's not all," Matt states, knowing you completely. You could tell him all about an event but leave one part out, and he instantly knows you're not telling him everything.

You look up at him, your eyes staring at his unfocused brown ones. They've landed on your chin, staring at the skin and making you shift slightly. You nibble a bit at your lower lip while he calmly sits there, waiting for you to talk.

"Well, I–" You sigh, stumbling a bit over your words. It's hard to adequately express how you feel and what you're trying to do. You take a deep breath through your nose, briefly flickering your eyes closed, "I try to see the world through your... eyes."

He lets out a huff of a laugh, a slight hint of hurt under the almost scoff, "Ha ha, very funny." He says flatly, raising his bottle to take another large gulp of his beer.

You furrow your brows, the crease between them growing as your lips turn down into a frown, "Huh? I– What's so funny? I try to understand you, to understand what you deal with, and you think that's a joke?"

"You don't understand, though." He snaps, placing his bottle down on the table with somewhat more force than necessary. His unfixed eyes are pinned to your collarbone, staring a hole through the bone.

You sigh exasperatedly, fingers tapping the table edge in frustration, "I mean, can't you see how hard I try?"

"No, not really." He jerkily moves his hand, pointing harshly to his face, "I am blind after all."

You cross your arms, face twisting in irritation. This isn't the time for Matt's smartass remarks. "Really, Matt?" You tip your head to the side, shaking it with annoyance, "I try to understand what you deal with because I fucking love you, and you find all of it funny?" Tears near the surface, burning your nose a bit.

Instantly, you see Matt's expression change, tasting the salt in the air. "Angel..." He breathes into the cool night air, his soft voice nearly drowned out by the city's roaring ambiance pouring in through the barely opened windows. He shifts around the coffee table, scooping you up into his hold. His muscular arms wrap around your waist, cradling you close to his body.

"I go to parks, close my eyes, and listen to people like you do." You huff out through slight sniffles, "And I have this favorite garden nearby that I hang out at, where I close my eyes, smell the flowers, and try to pull the scents apart." You explain through a few tears as he quickly wipes them away lovingly.

"Really?" He asks in a murmur, realizing how much you genuinely are trying. The beautiful brown of his eyes swirl around with tears and love, showing you the vulnerability you're happy he's willing to share with you.

You nod into his shirt before pulling back and darting your gaze over his face. His slightly parted lips huff out small puffs of hot air over your face, dampening more when he darts his lips out to lick them nervously. His scruff brushes coarsely under your palms as you gently cup his face, rubbing the pads of your thumbs over his cheekbones and jawline. Running your hands and eyes up to his brown eyes, lowered down to your chin. The dark, chocolatey color reflects the hue of blinking red and blue lights from the billboard across the street. His lashes flutter together, completely relaxing into your embrace as you smooth your fingertips over his lids.

You glide your hands over his scarred, rough skin and into his silky soft strands of hair. They mirror the comfort and velvetiness of your shared sheets, tangling around your fingers precisely the same way.

You tilt your head up, leaning toward his face to gently kiss him. You could stay here forever, sitting in his lap and showing him how loved he is. The world melts away; the only thing that matters is his touch against yours and his pure love and devotion. Eventually, you pull back, placing pecks on his lips before gingerly pressing a tender kiss to his forehead.

You lower yourself back into his grasp, sighing in contentment as you lay your head on his chest. "Really." You confirm, nuzzling against his heartbeat, "And my favorite thing to listen to is your heart." You continue, stroking your fingers along his torso lovingly as you kiss where you lay, "It's the only thing in this world that brings me this much peace."

Matt's arms wrap tightly around your waist, pulling you into his hold entirely. He shoves his face into your hair, hot tears trailing down the strands and onto your neck. "I'm sorry, Angel." A soft peck is placed on the crown of your head, "I love you." He whispers against your skin.

"I love you too, Matty."

[najia-cooks]

Fig buttercup soup

This earthy, complex, savory soup is a play on Italian wedding soup, using a common invasive garden weed as its bitter green.

Fig buttercup, or lesser celandine (Ficaria verna), is a low-growing, flowering perennial that can be damaging to ecosystems in many parts of the United States and Canada, where it has been widely introduced. It forms dense mats early on in the spring, and out-competes other wildflowers; the resulting lack of variety can be harmful to pollinators.

If you have a small infestation, it can be cleared by digging it up manually, though you will need to take care to gather all the tubers, and the small bulbils on the stems, from which the plant can regrow. It's best to eradicate lesser celandine before it has a chance to flower. There is a recompense for your trouble: all parts of this plant, including its roots and tubers, are edible if cooked or dried.

Recipe below the cut!

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Raw lesser celandine contains protoanemonin, a toxin that can cause nausea, vomiting, or paralysis if ingested in large quantities. The plant must be cooked or dried to eliminate the toxin. Keep all parts of the plant that you're going to eat at or above boiling point for at least 15 minutes.

Younger plants have less of the toxin, and some people report consuming young leaves raw, but I haven't tried this myself. If you want to eat lesser celandine leaves raw, I would suggest pulling the leaves, but leaving the tubers, then harvesting the leaves in another couple of days, when they have had a chance to sprout again. That way you will know for sure that the leaves are young. It is probably easier to just find some bittercress or violet, though!

Ingredients

500g lesser celandine (leaves, roots, and tubers)

1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil

2 tsp cumin (jeera)

1 tsp kala jeera

1 tsp black mustard seeds (rai)

2 pods green cardamom (elaichi), lightly crushed

1 Mediterranean (laurel) bay leaf

1 large white or yellow onion, diced

4 cloves garlic, chopped

1 green Thai bird's eye chili pepper (optional)

1 large tomato, diced

1 carrot, sliced (optional)

1 vegetarian chicken bouillon cube, or paste

Water or vegetable stock, to cover

1/4 cup acini di pepe

Salt and black pepper, to taste

Drizzling olive oil and lemon wedges, to serve

Lesser celandine leaves are a little bitter: like kale, or spinach, but more mildly flavored. The tubers are mildly earthy, like potatoes. My choice of spices plays up the earthy qualities of the leaves and tubers, but you can spice this soup any way you'd like.

Instructions

1. Place plants in a large bowl filled with water and agitate. Lift plants out of the water into a colander to allow dirt to sink to the bottom. Pour the dirty water through a strainer to capture any stray tubers, and set the tubers aside. Repeat this washing and straining process until the water runs completely clear. You may need to rub the tubers and roots between your hands to loosen dirt.

2. Roughly chop the leaves, being sure to separate large clusters at the base. Optionally remove some of the larger roots (the roots are edible and I found that they softened into the soup, rather than remaining chewy or stringy, so it's up to you).

3. If you have any particularly long tubers, cut them into bite-sized pieces.

4. Heat olive oil on medium in a large, heavy-bottomed pot. Add whole spices (cumin seeds, kala jeera, mustard seeds, cardamom, bay leaf) and fry for 30 seconds to a minute, until cumin seeds are popping into the air.

5. Add tubers and onion and fry 3-5 minutes, until onion is translucent. Add garlic and chili and fry until onion is browned and garlic is golden.

6. Add tomato and salt and fry until tomato is softened.

7. Add the rest of the plants and heat, stirring occasionally, until leaves are wilted.

8. Add water or vegetable stock to cover, and stir. Add carrots if using. Cover the pot and simmer for 15 minutes.

9. Remove some broth into a separate bowl and whisk in bouillon. Pour back into the pot.

10. Add pasta and cook for 9-11 minutes, until tender. Taste and adjust salt and pepper.

Identifying lesser celandine

Do not eat any plant unless you have a conclusive identification. The information here is intended as a general guide and is not necessarily sufficient to conclusively identify this plant.

Large bed of lesser celandine showing flowers, leaves, and buds

Lesser celandine grows from a cluster of underground tubers in a dense rosette. Tubers are oblate; on larger plants, they grow in clusters.

Unearthed clump of lesser celandine, with roots; clean tuber at right

Leaves are hairless, fleshy, and cordate (heart-shaped), with wavy margins (edges); they are dark green on top, and pale green or silverish on the bottom. They can sometimes show variegation (lighter patterning). Petioles (leaf stalks) have deep grooves down the center.

Leaf top (left) and underside (right). Petiole is visibly grooved from the front

Flowers are yellow or purple and bractless, with 7-9 petals, and many stamens and carpels.

Lesser celandine flower; leaf at bottom left shows some variegation

Lookalikes

Violet

Before it flowers, lesser celandine may resemble violet. Violet leaves have a greater tendency to curl inward at the petiole to form cups. They are more heavily serrated, rather than gently scalloped, as lesser celandine leaves are. Violets grow from rhizomes, rather than tubers. The flowers and leaves of the violet plant are edible raw or cooked; the rhizomes are not.

Violet (left); lesser celandine (right)

Violet (left); lesser celandine (right)

Littleleaf buttercup

Lesser celandine leaves may resemble the lower leaves of the littleleaf, or kidney leaf, buttercup; but littleleaf buttercup is an upright plant, with stems several inches in height. Little buttercup is toxic cooked or raw.

[feinecutasy]

Straightening up the records

“Stupid”, I curse as I sniff the first pair of musty trainers.

I work for an interrealm conglomerate that provides scented ubersolutions. You know, humans love buying those scented candles that smell like the abandoned garden of some junior apothecarist. Morons, all of them. Like, the scents aren’t even real. They’re still, static, lifeless, worthless! We cater to the warlockry-aligned, and thus it is natural that what we produce are superior. It’s called ubersolutions for a reason. ᴀɴʏᴛʜɪɴɢ can be imbued with ᴀɴʏ ꜱᴄᴇɴᴛ. Bodies, clothes, spells, minds, thoughts, concepts. From tiefling-scented fireballs or halflings' leaf rain cubes to modifying a human’s olfactory sense so that they smell a goblin’s crotch whenever they see a banana. What’s more, an object once imbued will smell as if it’s actually producing the scent itself. Granted, the subsidiary company that I’m working for only makes human and human-adjacent products for mid- and low-end sectors. But hey! Our line of work requires no less integrity and arcane knowledge than those of the other professionals working in the outer realms.

Two days ago, some fruity producer from Nagoya had ordered 16 pairs of sports shoes as part of the preparation for his upcoming unreality show where humans and homunculi compete in some obscure obstacle course. But not just any normal sports shoes, the ones we have in store have been worn by famous human athletes from all over the opaque world. ᴏʀɪɢɪɴᴀʟꜱ. The wear and tear and stains are still here. Some of them still retain the smell of dirt and grime, one pair even carries with them the peculiar mixed scent of spilled beer and piss. Although the lads from sales did inform our client that some cleats would suit his’s contestants better, he still ended up ordering normal trainers. 13 of them – a mix of Pamu, Ekin, Azix and Ripoc – are already packaged and ready to be thoroughported to the Japanese hub. The problem? Those scatterbrained SOBs from procurement had fucked up the records of the Valdidaß batch when it was shipped to the thoroughport last month. To make matter worse, the higher-ups decided to use aether clamps instead of mana seals to preserve the scents of all products categorised as “non-fungibly imbued”. This means that any forensic technique applied on a pair of stinkers to find out who its original owner is would risk tampering with the emission mechanism, or worse, the scent.

And thus, the only shapeshifter from the Audit department – that’s me! – is up to save the day. My task: to straighten up the records. Test the trainers, find out the identities of their original owners, single out the 3 pairs to be shipped to Nagoya and send the data along with proof of work to middle management through our internal channel. My boss has so gracefully teleported the whole mislabeled batch to my house, which means my overtime already started 17 minutes ago. So here I am, with 10 identical – and by identical, I mean worn, dirty and smelly – pairs of Valdidaß Top 10 ÆU size 45 lying neatly in my teeny-weeny pocket-dimensional bedroom.  

I pick up a pair at random and take a whiff. These seem new compared to the others, and relatively less as rank. Still in my casual clothes – protocols require us to undress before shifting, but I’m too lazy for that – I delve in deeper. The damp smell of grass, dirt and sweat invades my nose at once. And my body, with its innate magical power, reacts almost immediately.

My lanky frame starts to bulge out with lean, toned muscle, filling up my black t-shirt nicely. My facial bones twitch and shift to match the face of the athlete. The skin on my face tightens and the hair on my head starts to grow inward and compresses itself, revealing a crew cut that nicely accentuates my now smooth, youthful face. My cock thickens and pushes out a little bit, the veins on it becoming less prominent. Further down begins the thickening of my thighs, accompanying which is the elongating of my legs. My quads bulge immensely, each head gaining more definition as they grow. I feel itchy for a moment. Seems like a few fresh scars have manifested on the skin of my upper legs. My buttocks expand outward, becoming two large, firm globes of muscle. The increased mass causes my jeans to strain somewhat against the new contours of my lower half. Finally, my calves buff up and my feet get slightly larger until they reach the ideal size to fit into these bad boys.

Nice bod. And a pretty interesting one too. The lad has a birthmark at the base of his dick and left thumb stubbier than right. I glance at the mirror to see a young human athlete with warm blue eyes looking back at me. Judging from the build, might probably be a footballer. But not someone famous enough for me to recognise. Besides, I’m pretty sure we only procured from footballers imbued cleats, not trainers. I have to check the database … Yup, that’s him. He has a beard now, and has grown his hair out somewhat. But a search for some photos taken around the time this pair was first registered did result in current ‘me’. So, this must be Erik Bepunkt, an up-and-coming gymnast from Köln. I quickly pull up the company’s ERP app, note the data, then send to Slakk a selfie of young Erik in black t-shirt, tight white jeans and tattered trainers.

Onto my next pair. I quickly grab the one next to me and sniff. Fuck, this is ɪɴᴛᴇɴꜱᴇ. Now, I may be a bum, but my experience as a shapeshifting auditor is unmatched amongst my peers. That whiff I just took – that’s real business. I have to take off all my clothing, or else things will definitely get torn off. T-shirt – off, Erik’s smelly trainers – off, jeans – off, undies – bird set free.

Still staying as the young gymnast, I energetically absorb the characteristic foulness into my lungs. Right away, my spine shoots up, earning me an extra foot. Muscles continue to accumulate on my already athletic frame that I copied from Erik. They swell and firm up across my chest, shoulders and arms, giving me a lean but powerful physique. My waist and legs remain roughly the same as before. My arms, however, have noticeably extended outward, greatly increasing my arm span. Perhaps the owner of these reekers was a rower. Or a swimmer. But the next stage of my transformation would cast doubts on that theory. A thick layer of coarse hair sprouts across my newly broadened back and pumped-up chest down to my washboard abs. Cthulhu’s tits this guy is ʜᴀɪʀʏ. My cock twitches a little as it adjusts to its new proportion. Smaller than Erik’s, but still not too shabby. My Ericesque baby face matures, my hair recedes and my jawline becomes more defined as stubble shadows my cheeks and chin.

The shifting is complete. Now that I have a closer look, the build is definitely that of a swimmer. But this amount of body hair combined with the receding hairline tells me that he’s no longer competing. I just need one quick check in the mirror, and … Holy shit, it’s Antoine Plucinski. He’s the coach of the French Olympic swimming team! And his protégé just won a gold medal too! Finally, some progress. Unlike some other cretins who share with the humans the incomprehensible mania towards football, my heart has always belonged to the water. To swimming, diving and sea monsters alike. Well, it’s not everyday you get to shift into an OG MVP. But that’s just one part of my excitement. This pair of trainers is marked to be sent to Nagoya, and that means I’m allowed by management to do some “enhancement” work.

My company is world-renowned for producing the freshest scents. Tch, all marketing gimmicks. If you think the lingering smell of those funky Satyrspel coats on the market was sealed exactly when those hairy bastards were too busy fucking each other, then the company duped you good. Truth is, most of the time the freshness is artificially enhanced. Aye, I know it’s not authentic. But you are delusional to think that the cosmic gem-hoarders care about your demand for authenticity. How is it actually done? Well, industrially, the fleshweavers would grow a bunch of samples in their conjuratory, stimulate the samples to the extreme, then bind them with the items. But for a one-off job like this, a shapeshifter like me with some knowledge of imbuement will suffice.

I delicately remove the aether clamp with my ectoplier. Minutes later and I have already put on a full set of sportswear, with my feet neatly snuggling beneath the dank trainers. No socks, of course. Gotta optimise the process as much as possible. I head downstairs to the summoning room. The golem accepts my prompt, and just like that, the empty street of Chiangmai opens up before my eyes, with its blazing sun hovering above my head.

Then I start running.  

ʜᴜꜰꜰ. It’s nice to stay in one form like this. No flashy magic, just nature (well, conjured nature) and a human body. How wonderful, the feeling of sweat naturally dripping down my body without any fleshweaving stimulants.

ʜᴜꜰꜰ. But I dread the moment I have to say goodbye to Antoine here. I hate changing forms constantly. It’s exhausting and makes me feel dizzy.

ʜᴜꜰꜰ. To think that there’s 8 more pairs of trainers left to be processed – 8 more records to be fixed – I can’t help but let the hatred for my job boil up inside me.

After this gig I’ll ask for a raise.

And maybe spend my vacation in Vanaheim as a double-dicked Latino centaur.

[cursedcupcakemaster]

Notes;I don't own diabolik lovers or it's characters this is merely a fictional work and my interpretation of how things might go, reader can be supernatural if you want

Warnings:Blood mentions, it's diabolik lovers so proceed with caution(these are a bit short ), some saucy spots where you get bit, Azusas scars

Type:Raspberry Boba

Characters;Mukami Bros from diabolik lovers

Mini Dating Headcanons

Ruki

Ruki tends to be a bit stern with you but he genuinely does want to make you happy

Most of your dates are coffee dates and trips to the book store or library, he's pretty chill

Theres at least one horseback riding date

Sometimes you both will cook together

Kisses between you aren't that often but when you do they feel soft and gentle and often taste lightly of black tea

Ruki knows all your favorite dishes by heart

Sometimes he'll read to you until you fall asleep

He usually drinks your blood from your wrists or your neck since you can cover it up fairly easily

Cuddling isn't done a lot between yall but he's fine with it every once in a while and when it does happen he holds you tightly holding you to his chest making you feel safe

Your relationship is overall not really that bad you're there for one another and that's enough

Kou

Oh boy you guys have a lot of work cut out for you

Firstly he might want to keep it secret he's an idol after all and he doesn't want his fans harassing you

Cute dates at cat cafes and amusement parks,

Kou writes love songs just for you and made sure you had V.I.P tickets to each one so you could meet with him backstage

He loves snuggling with you often acts as the big spoon while humming one of those aforementioned love songs into your ear until you're asleep, when you're the big spoon he loves when you run your fingers through his hair it makes him feel special

Kissing, it kinda depends on how he's feeling. If he's feeling nice he'll be gentle and sweet but if he's feeling jealous he's a bit more rough biting your lips a little

Kou likes to drink your blood from your thigh or collarbone since you can at least hide the marks

As I mentioned you guys have a lot of work to do not only due to how Kou can be but his own circumstances but he loves you dearly

Yuma

Like all of the boys he's gonna have his issues but you guys make it work

He's not all bad in fact he's the one who makes sure you eat and sleep properly and if you take medicines that you have them

You guys will often work in his garden together where he may or may not have planted your favorite flowers

Sometimes Yuma will share his sugar cubes with you, he doesn't give them to just anyone so to him it's worth it to give a few to you

Yuma will eat anything you make and maybe tell you how to improve it, he certainly provides you fresh ingredients you two grew together

When you two cuddle he's the big spoon no questions asked, he'll pretend to hate it but he loves it and he holds you tightly so he's sure you won't up and disappear

Often Yuma will bite your neck to drink blood so everyone can see his marks

Kissing is rough and passionate he'll bite your lips a bit, his lips taste of sugar cubes and fresh tomatoes

Yuma won't say it too often but he appreciates the things you do and loves you

Azusa

Listen to me this boy deserves the world and he's nothing if not your biggest supporter

Azusa loves showing you his knife collection

Introduced you to his "friends"/scars, often praises you

If you happen to cook he will ask if you can make extra spicy stuff, he'll be even happier if you grow things like ghost peppers and even without those he loves your food

Dates are typically going around shops to look at interesting things or movie nights at home

Cuddles are gonna happen and usually you're the big spoon Azusa likes laying his head on your chest and listening to your heartbeat it makes him feel safe he's even mentioned it's one of his favorite sounds

Kissing is very gentle but he might bite sometimes If he's feeling particularly energetic but it's still pretty soft, his lips taste like spicy food half the time and will leave a bit of a tingling feeling

When Azusa bites you he goes for the shoulder and neck, he likes to leave a lot of marks because he thinks they're beautiful on you

If you have something like a sport or a concert of some kind he will go see you

You guys might need therapy but Azusa is an angel and loves you more than anything in the world

[kedreeva]

There are good things in this world still

Today, I harvested a bundle of parsley from my garden. Alongside of the strawberries, it is the last thing still growing green, despite the cold. I only harvested around the outer edge, from the stalks that were starting to droop, and trimming those off revealed a wealth of fresh stalks that will now have room to grow before winter truly sets in. I planted parsley this year because I have been making stock from my use fowl carcasses, and wanted to try to grow some of the ingredients here myself. I also planted some garlic bulbs and carrot tops, which may or may not have ultimately taken- I knew I wouldn't get either from them this year or anything, but if the plants could take root in the soil, then maybe next year I won't have to buy (as much) garlic or carrots for stock making. Potatoes and onions are next. You might wonder how much stock one person uses, but Sark makes a lot of rice dishes he uses stock for, and I make soups, stews, and sometimes even add a cube while cooking pasta for extra flavor. It's small, it's just a few little plants that had a hell of a time getting started this summer, but holding a thick bundle of stalks in my hand and knowing I've taken one step closer to growing some of my own food needs feels great.

There are good things left in the world, however big or small. This is your invitation to reblog this and share your good things with each other, or check the notes if you need a reminder.

As an addendum today, if you are feeling like you don't have good things to share, consider making some good things for yourself tomorrow (or today, if there's still time!)- take a bath and use the favorite soap scent or bath bomb or whatever you've been saving for a special occasion, eat a treat or make a favorite meal, clean something you've been putting off, call or message or meet up with a friend you haven't seen in a bit to regain that community connection, snuggle your pet or loved one, look up photos of your favorite interest (animals, technology, architecture, travel destination, whatever it is!), watch a favorite movie you haven't seen in a while, take a walk around a park or community attraction, visit the library and see if there are clubs or meetings or events you may want to attend or just pull a book off the shelf and read for a bit. There are good things, there are still so many good things, you just have to reach out and touch them to remember they are there.

[luveline]

Hi Jade! I wanted to request something with Prince Steve and his soulmate. I feel like we’ve started to see them warm up to each other but maybe we could see reader start to meet Steve’s friends and see that she’s got more people standing behind her? Like maybe Robin and Eddie teasing Steve about something embarrassing in front of her or I know she hasn’t shown up yet but I could totally see Nancy as like a lady in waiting/tutor to teach her all about proper manners but in the process she spills all these stories about Steve growing up?

thank you for requesting ♡ prince steve au fem, 1k

A knock at the door, an impatient huff. "Are you ready yet?" 

"Come in, Steve." 

He wedges into your rooms, a basket in his hands. "Why are you on the floor?" 

"Can't tie my stupid shoes," you complain, dropping your hands down, knee pulled up, too warm for all the fuss. 

Steve nearly drops the basket, he's that enthusiastic to help you out. He kneels by your feet and takes the laces of your shoes into his hands, pulling them tight, his eyebrows pinched tighter. "That okay?" he asks, pausing his loop. 

"Yeah. Thank you." 

"They didn't teach you how to tie your shoes back home? We need outreach immediately." 

You laugh and lay back on the plush rug behind you. "It's the weird eyelets. You royals do everything weird. Like picnicking." 

"So many points. These aren't eyelets, they're lace hooks. You're pretty much as royal as I am, or you will be in a matter of days. And," —he finishes tying your boot, pulling the other toward him with a small laugh— "Robin wanted a picnic. She's not royal. None of your points make any sense." 

"You'll be a wretched husband." 

Steve takes your hands and pulls you up into a sitting position. He doesn't let them go, transferring both into one so he has a hand free to straighten up your cardigan. "And you'll be a cherished wife." 

Steve pulls you onto your feet. Together, you walk through the selenite halls of the palace to the prince's private gardens, where a gazebo the colour of the sky stands shading refreshments from the eager sun. Helping themselves to the hors d'oeuvres are a tall Eddie and a shorter partner in crime, Robin. Nancy lays out in the grass next to who you assume to be her boyfriend, a handsome guy with two books in his hands, still closed. He squints in the sun, waving as you and Steve approach. 

"Hey!" he greets. "You're late."

"Don't get up," Steve jokes, waving back at him and Nancy, who's barely lifted her head. "Not like I'm anyone important." 

"Very, very hard to find you important when you're wearing shorts," Eddie says. 

Steve shrugs. "She likes them." 

You realise belatedly and with horror that you're she. How does he know you like his nice shorts? Either way, his indifference so long as you like them makes you flush, leaving his side in search of a cold drink to drown yourself in.

"Did you bring the bat?" Steve asks Jonathan behind you. 

"Hey, babe," Eddie says, offering you a glass cup set with pressed flowers in the sides, "you okay?" 

"Is that lemonade?" you ask, pointing at one of the small water dispensers. Their glass shells shine with condensation, more ice cubes than liquid inside. It's a cloudy white with blood orange slices cut and garnishing the top, their juice seeping downward slowly. 

"Sure is. Prince Stevie's favourite, as always. Don't know where the sudden love for oranges came from, do you?" 

You've had a love for them since you got here and tried them for the first time. Oranges are expensive, and so the palace kitchen has them in abundance. Steve clearly noticed. "Wouldn't you know?" you ask. "Don't you choose his meals?" 

"As if. I'm a glorified cleaning boy," Eddie says. He scoops a bagel covered in cream cheese and fresh cut salmon from a silver tray and takes a big bite. "Just stick around for the food." 

"They won't let him back into the engineers workshop on account of his bad manners, he'll be a dishwasher forever," Robin says grandly, rounding the table to stand on your other side. 

"Says you, lady's maid." 

Robin was supposed to be a lady's maid. Sick gig, good pay, she had all the grades and none of the decorum, but Steve wouldn't let them get rid of her, and after an intense training program that taught her to wield a titanium blade longer than her arm as an extension of it, she was instated as his personal guard instead. They're all job hoppers —Nancy started as a lady's maid but now apprentices as a royal tutor, and her boyfriend worked for the palace's news room but now works under the sous chef. 

You did anything you could to stay alive, and now your full time job is princess, so. You're not judging. 

"What's Nancy's boyfriends name?" you whisper. "Jon?" 

"Jonathan. I don't think anybody calls him Jon," Robin whispers back. 

"She's lying. His name is Gordon." Eddie glares at Robin. "She's trying to trip you up." 

A smack erupts through the air, chased by Steve's pleased whoop. "Yes! Baby, did you see that?" 

"I'm not trying to trip you up," Robin says, "don't listen." 

"She totally is." 

"Baby?" Steve calls, yards away in the bluegrass, a bat held at his side. "Guys, stop harassing her. Jesus." 

"We're not harassing her, Stevie, slow your roll. This is a common social phenomenon called teasing, maybe you've heard of it? You do it with friends," Eddie says, nudging your arm. 

Friends, you think. Steve's looking at you, waiting for confirmation that you're alright. "I didn't see it, Steve. Do it again!" 

Steve immediately jogs backwards, goading Jonathan into pitching another ball. He has a good arm, the ball soaring just right for Steve to curl back and send it wide across the green grass of the garden. It hits a long banner across the way, smack dab on its painted target as he'd aimed for, falling practically on top of the first. 

It's an impressive arc. You clap your hands together and cheer, though the rules of this game escape you. You think it's supposed to be darts without sharp points, but you're more concerned with the lines of Steve's bicep as he rests the bat on his shoulder, his triumphant sun-kissed smile.

"Did you see that one, baby?" Robin asks. 

"He's so impressive, isn't he?" Eddie adds, grinning. 

Steve throws them the bird, his cheeks pink. 

"That's an example of what not to do in a formal setting," Nancy says, her skirt moving like water as she puts her face in her hand, her elbow on her knee. 

"You're getting good at this tutoring stuff," Jonathan says. 

Steve meanders your way to beg a consolation hug (he puts his arm across your shoulder, muttering about mean friends and their unjust jokes). "They're the worst," he mutters, his hair brushing your ear, goosebumps erupting down your arms. 

"I think they're nice," you say. 

He hums in your ear. "You would. Wretched wife." 

[anonmousegosqueak]

Again, about the married multiverse but this time it came to me as hobbies they could share…

Ghostsoap have a little miniature collection, nothing big, but Simon likes carving little animals out of wood when he has nothing to do and Soap every once in a while takes his acrylics out and starts painting them, some more realistically, with fur, shadow and highlights and others (in particular two ferrets that were soooooo cute) he paints them to resemble them. One with really dark fur and a white face and one with brown fur, a lighter stomach and face to which he attacked some extra wood to recreate his mahawk (when he showed them to Simon the man hugged him tight and didn’t let him go for a few minutes for how happy he was about that dumb little project

RoachGaz have a small garden, but they use every square centimeter of it to plant some flowers. They have a bunch of plants, cactuses, aromatic plants, even some Aloe for Roach's skin for when it itches more than usual, they slend hours gardening every day and have shared a bunch of kisses between the flower pots (once a leaf stopped them from kissing and Gaz laughed so hard he had to sit down to not fall down and bring Roach with him

NikPrice have something weird going on. Price saw Nik's mom crochet ONCE and after that got a mild interest. It started with simply noticing how a lit of stuff in Nik's house was handmade, expecially things like hats, scarves and gloves. The in evolved into watching without being noticed a crochet square tutorial. Then he made a little scarf. And gifted it to Nik. He wasn't able to walk the morning after for how passionate that night was (Nik let him dominate by using it as a leash to control him) and now a lot of the kinky stuff in theri bedroom instead of being leather is crochet. This also means that every time Nik wears a scarf made by Price he gets a chub

LaswellSara. So, how do you impress a wife that is super strong, works for the CIA, is super smart and is a great investigator? Easy, rubies cube variants. Sara had started resolving a few in middle school, but then lost the passion. Then when she saw one in a store at a discout she bought it and tried to resolve it at home. Skip to several months later where a whole shelf and a half is full of rubik cubes, 2×2, 3×3, 4×4, 5×5, 6×6, mirror cubes with weird shapes, other shapes, coloured, variants… she and Laswell regularly try to beat each other's time record

You *cannot* stick the NikPrice bit in without a warning. I literally choked. Wholesome, wholesome, SURPRISE- SMUT THAT LITERALLY MADE YOU BLUSH.

(/j I love it. Gimme more weird kinky bastards that go outside the norm. I literally crochet and I can confirm, that stuff is strong and could easily be used for that sorta stuff.)

I've gotta make these shorter, I'm about to go for a walk and I wanna get my thoughts out before I get hit by a bus (and you're explanation is amazing, I don't even need to add anything)

Soap helps Ghost unlock his creativity, in return Ghost is almost like a muse. He gives things for Soap to paint, whether it's a portrait or little figurines. Also- may I suggest he carved a little goose and a little cat? For no particular reason at all, (⁠●⁠_⁠_⁠●⁠)

We literally both said Roach and Gaz have a garden and I think that just speaks to how perfect the thought is. Roach likes to grow herbs for Gaz's cooking, Gaz likes to grow aloe and other things to help Roach's burns.

Hggfhhhhhshdhhwhehe freaky Nik Price. (That's all I can say, I'm too busy losing my mind)

Rubik's cube lesbians is a beautiful genre, I will gladly put Laswell and Sara in that category (also dispite Kate being autistic, Sara is more 'stereotypical autistic'. She's the one who introduced the idea, contrary to what others might think.)

Also- why haven't we added Alejandro and Roldolfo to this?!? I need my gay Mexican cowboys doing cute domestic shit, N O W.

(they're living in Las Almas obviously, I just can't decide who gets the last name because they're both so good.)

[milkymora]

✧ yuma mukami - headcanons ✧

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note: happy birthday to my favorite diaboy ever!!! 🎂🎉 i love him so much, he was my first ever comfort character ( ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈) all headcanons are SFW! credit of the pictures used to the respective owners on pinterest.

ꞝ his childhood.

he was such a troublemaker at school. he was super active and needed to constantly move around, which he did, and would always get scolded for that. he also had no problem talking back at any teacher.

he didn’t really have many toys, and actually enjoyed playing outside with other kids way more, he was very social. he loved ball games, dodgeball & football especially!

an animal lover. his heart melts for dogs, big ones especially. he probably had one or two growing up in his village, to help with the hunt.

ꞝ his appearance.

very muscled. he doesn’t work out, but his constant working on the garden, lifting heavy stuff and employing machineries all the time got him to build a lot of muscle mass. mostly on his upper body, his biceps are huge.

has freckles. his skin tone is pretty tanned, he stays out most of the day and therefore tans a lot, which tends to hide them, but during winter season they’re visible all over his body, especially on his face.

his teeth are crooked. since after his milk teeth fell, the new ones grew out crooked both on the upper and bottom part. he always had them that way and doesn’t really care much, although kou teases him often, calling him “shark teeth”.

ꞝ his likes.

he loves bonsai trees. he has a little collection of several pieces into his room and treats them like his children. whoever touches them is dead.

we all know he has a sweet tooth. he enjoys sugar in all of its forms, from sugar cubes to cakes, cookies, muffins and every sweet or candy existing. he can’t resist a dark chocolate bar, or a blueberry muffin.

likes tattoos. a very, mery lot. the big ones that cover completely one’s arm or leg, yeah, that’s his style. even more if they represent animals or tribals.

ꞝ his dislikes.

candles. he despises their smell, it makes him nauseous so quickly. he’s always bickering with ruki for that, since ruki enjoys them quite a lot.

reading. due to his dyslexia, he has problems reading correctly and therefore avoids it as much as he can, it’s one of his biggest insecurities.

it may sounds weird, but he doesn’t like music. he doesn’t really listen to it, never. any genre at all. it’s not like he hates it, but there’s no genre that appeals him.

ꞝ additional curiosities!

he fancies chubby people. he finds them to be very pretty and loves the feeling of squishy skin, it’s so nice to bite and, honestly, it attracts him a lot.

drinks tea religiously. he prefers it over coffee, which has a bitter taste to him (yeah, even with 5 teaspoons of sugar) and often drinks all kinds of teas. camomiles, green tea. it helps him sleep better.

he pouts when he’s mad. he isn’t even aware of it. he’ll be staring in the distance with the biggest, most serious pout one might see.

and that was it! gosh, it was fun writing these, it’s been so much since i last posted about dl. also!! @cyrilvows i don’t know if you’re interested in yuma’s hdcs, but i’m gonna tag you anyway 🌝 eheh, ty for reading, reblogs are super appreciated!

✧⠀ ⠀⠀✧⠀ ⠀⠀✧⠀ ⠀⠀✧⠀ ⠀⠀✧⠀ ⠀⠀✧⠀ ⠀⠀✧⠀ ⠀⠀✧⠀ ⠀⠀✧

[sapphireluna96]

Vaggie: (Telling more family stories) Talking to my mom is like trying to solve a Rubik's Cube; Like, I think I can figure it out, but it's going to take me a while. Like, I remember growing up, she just bust open my door once, looked at me, and went... "Where... is the grass fucker?" (The rest of the hotel crew laughs) I'm like, "I don't know what you're asking me! Where's the grass? And I'm the fucker? Or where's the 'grassfucker' as in one word? (The crew laughs again) "Do you mean the gardener? Are you calling the gardener that? 'Cos you should stop if you've been doing that." (The crew laughs again) She's like, "No, it's an item, it goes, 'rakatakatakataka!' Where is it?" ...The weed whacker? (The crew laughs again) Are you looking for the weed whacker? "Si." The neighbor has it. Why would I have it? I'm sixteen! I'm just trying to figure out if I'm gay or not *spoiler alert*. Why would I be messing with your gardening tools? "Okay, go get it." I guess I'll go get you the weed whacker.

[lssugaluv]

The way he asks you to marry him.

Fem reader x various Haikyuu characters.

• Haikyuu Headcanons.

• Small Stories + Headcanons.

• Contains: Fluff, bunch of it. How long you’ve been dating for, romance, sweetness, petnames, high school to adult romance.(most of them.)

• Characters: Ushijima, Kuroo, Sugawara, Atsumu, & Suna.

Sugawara;

You and Suga have been dating for 4 years now. You began dating on your third year of high school.

You were the girl of his dreams. When he had finally gained the courage to ask you to be his girlfriend, after having the biggest crush on you since your first year, he felt like he was about to pass out.

Those nerves came again when he asked you to meet him at your favorite garden in Kokedera, Kyoto. It was just the two of you, he wanted the proposal to be as intimate as can be.

He asked you to come in a cute flowy white dress he bought for you. He wore a loose white dress shirt with kacky pants and white slip on vans.

When he saw you arrive, he swore you were an Angel sent from heaven. Gorgeous as ever. Today you were just extra gorgeous to him.

At first you had no idea why he asked you to come dressed up to the garden but you didn’t question him. Once you arrived and saw him playing with his fingers and slightly flushed from his cheeks, you knew something was up.

He went ahead and grabbed both of your hands and yelled “I LOVE YOU.”

You giggle and tell him you love him as well.

“P..PL..PLEASE BE MY WIFE!”

You open your eyes wide and grow the biggest smile you can possibly have. “Baby, you don’t need to yell.” You say as you giggle. You reach in to kiss his soft lips and place your forehead on his, eyes closed. “I would love to be your wife.” As you both give each other the biggest bear hug.

Ushijima;

You and Ushijima have been dating for 3 years now.

You two met in middle school due to your family moving to Sendai and being neighbors with Ushijima. You guys will unintentionally walk to school together and back home.

In high school, you guys will hardly talk but he had always though you were very pretty. He loved how naturally beautiful you were and how happy you seem to be. He got to know after you two graduated Shiratorizawa. You both went to the same college and pursued your dream careers.

The way he asked to marry you was by taking you to the pathway to Shiratorizawa. Compared to your middle school walk, the high school was a bit further from your homes.

You guys will have to pass through a river path everyday and gorgeous greenery.

You two were walking in silence hand in hand. He always loved how your small hand fit perfectly with his huge hand. He loved how the soft wind will blow your hair and he was able to see your beautiful side view and features. He loved how every step he’ll take, you’ll try to keep up with him.

You two finally arrived to the River pathway and he had asked you to take a seat on the grass with him. You two enjoy the nature and the sounds of the river currents. Despite your now busy lives, he always enjoyed this peace with you. With no one around but just the two of you.

“I want to spend the rest of my life with you Y/N.”

You gently smile and rest your head on his shoulder , rubbing your hand up and down his forearm.

“I do too Toshi.”

He moves in front of you, blocking the view of the river, which you didn’t mind at all. He’s the view you love to see.

“Please marry me.” He says as he opens a small dark blue cube box with a simple silver band in the box.

You couldn’t help but not hold back your tears and nod your head as in yes. You stick your hand out and he places the small engagement band around your small finger. “I love you” you say as you give him the most sweetest kiss.

Suna;

You and Suna have been best friends since elementary.

You two began to actually date on your first year of high school. You have been his high school sweetheart, his biggest supporter, his best friend, his everything since day one. He knew one day he will marry you. And the day to ask the big question has came at last.

Suna has always been one to keep to himself but when it came to the two of you being alone, man was he attached to you. He always shows his true colors when only being with you. He is crazy in love with you.

The way he asks to marry you is by asking you to come over to his apartment and making dinner together.

You came dressed in a nice light pink corset top with light washed jeans and low white heels. You always loved to get dolled up for him even when he said he preferred you in his sweater and sweatpants.

He was dressed casual, a black polo shirt and some jeans, and shoes, well he had slippers on because he was inside his apartment.

You guys decide to go with chicken Alfredo pasta since today’s date night dinner was Italian. You guys always will meet up during your busy weeks, or FaceTime when he was out of the country or town due to tournaments. You will always play “Spin the Wheel” using your phone and typing which country you guys should do date night with.

Since it was Italian night, you guys made homemade pasta, got store bought Gelato, and decided to watch “Letters To Juliet.” He knew how much you love romance movies, so he always let you choose the movies.

Meanwhile you guys were eating, you noticed he was eating slower than usual. Which you grew to worry because the food was very delicious. “Rin Rin, is everything okay?” He picked up that he was overthinking and quickly stuffed pasta in his mouth. “Yes princess. The food is delicious.” He says with a mouthful.

When you cleaned up after eating and served the gelato, you meet him at the couch with the movie ready to play on Netflix. You notice that he was on his phone, which was a rule that when on date night, no phones allowed. You stopped the movie to ask him what was wrong again.

He assures you nothing is wrong and told you to play the movie. You then notice he once again is focused of his phone when you pull the phone away from his hands. He freezes when you gasped after you read what was on the Google search.

“ How to surprise girlfriend with a proposal?”

After you finished reading, you saw he was right in front of you, both knees on the ground and one small white box on your thigh. “I panicked and didn’t know how to surprise you. But I want you to be with me forever more. Sorry you had to find out through Google Y/N.”

You place the white box on the side of the couch and literally jump on him, both of your bodies dropping to the ground. You begin to give him a billions of kisses all over his face, with the biggest smile on your face. “A millions times yes Rintarou.”

Kuroo;

As he’s pacing back and forth in Kenma’s room, he finally got an idea. “I know where! I can propose to Y/N at the beach.” He says as he grabs on to his best friends shoulders, blocking his game.

Kenma moves his head to the side to get a view of his game. “I already told you that idea.”

You and Kuroo have been dating for 2 years. You guys met at work in the office. You guys actually met at the beach. It was frustrating day for him, and he loves to cool off at the beach. You had gone that day because you were supposed to go on a date, just for the guy to stood you up. You knew of one another at work but never actually spoken until that day.

He had saw you walking alone by the waves, barefoot while you were holding your heels. It was freezing that day, which he thought you were insane walking barefoot. He walks toward you when he saw you were wiping your tears and standing in front of the ocean.

“Y/N, are you okay?” You turn to face the tall man and completely ball out crying. He invited you to eat ramen after your cried it out and took you home. He waited in the living room until you showered and had made tea for you. He then had left once he saw you fully asleep, and left a note on your nightstand giving you his number.

You meet him at the beach and you see he is standing right in front of the ocean. You silently walk toward him and stand next to him, taking in the ocean breeze. “Remember two years ago when I met you at this exact spot? You were crying for some asshole meanwhile I was having a work meltdown.” He still hadn’t made any eye contact with you but continued. “I remember thinking how pretty you looked crying and wondered to myself, man, if only a girl can cry for me.”

He takes your hand and placed a small diamond ring on your left ring finger. “Let me be the one to wipe your tears on the altar when we’re getting married. I love you, always and forever. Thank you for being my everything.”

You begin to cry after staring at the tiny rock for a good 5 minutes. He gently picks up your face with his two huge hands, wiping your happy tears with his thumbs. “Yes Tetsu. Yes.”

Atsumu;

You and Atsumu have been dating for 5 years. You began to date during your second year of high school. Everyone who knew you and Atsumu gave you 1 week for you to break up with him. They always knew Atsumu to be the dumb volleyball nerd meanwhile you were a smart straight A student. You both were pretty popular, but people thought you were too much for Atsumu.

Atsumu has always been loud, obnoxious, and sometimes an airhead. But boy did he love you. He knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you as soon as you had surprised him at one of his volleyball games. “She’s the one.” He said nice and proud to his teammates that day at the locker rooms.

During the nationals, he went out of the country and had invited you with him. It was pretty tough for you to leave due to your university schedule but you had managed to make it. You were wearing his jersey that day, cheering loud and proud for your MSBY superstar.

You hear the bell and call it game and they had won. From there , some people were leaving and you were so excited to see Atsumu to congratulate him and the team. From there, you see yourself on the jumbo screen confused. You look down at Atsumu and look back up at the jumbo screen to see Atsumu on one knee with the screen saying “Marry me baby.” The screen once again goes back to you with tears running down your face and the rest of the crowd cheering loudly.

Bokuto had ran to go get you and grabs your hand and you both run to the court. Once you guys get to the doors of the entrance of the courts, Bokuto stops and leaves you on your own. You charged towards Atsumu, jumping on him and clinging on him. You gave him a huge kiss and said “I would love to marry you Atsumu.” He then pulls your head towards him and gives you three huge kisses, carrying you meanwhile the crowd roars again and all cameras on you both.

After thoughts:

• Hey y’all. Coming back to you with some fluff because why not? And Haikyuuuu head canons are my fav. I just got married through the court. So of course love is in the air and I wanted to write about proposing.

• Not Proofread. :/

• Please enjoy, like, comment & Reblog.

• Please do not copy my work. <3

[upthewitchypunx]

@build-castles-on-the-moon let me tell you about my friend borage, my companion, if you will. Several years ago I got seeds from Alchemy Works and they have been happily reseeding since! They are an annual and grow about 2 feet to 3 feet tall. The stalks are hollow and hairy. The flowers are mostly blue but also some are pink or white or some are a neat combo of the colors. The flowers taste like cucumber and can be added to salads or ice cubes, also bees LOVE them. Birds also love their seeds. It's often the first plant and the last plant to bloom in my garden making it good early and late food for birds and pollinators. It reseeds prolifically but not too aggressive.

Roman soldiers are said to have eaten it for courage going into battle. I've made a personal tradition of eating the first bloom of the year for courage for the whole year or just picking one as I leave the house for a little boost.

I'll try to save some seeds and get them up on the website this year, but Ian B might be sad if I steal them from his favorite house finch couple that he says they come by for dates to our borage plants. He's convinced the borage is why he's s plumage is so red.

Here's some pictures of my friend borage.

[heavyhitterheaux]

Chains and Whips Excite Me (NSFW)

First Lady of Private Garden Fic

AN: you know it's always something with these two 🤭🤭

Synopsis: You and Jack end up needing a little bit of help when both of you end up being handcuffed together and the key is nowhere to be found

Pairing: Husband!Jack Harlow x Wife!Reader

First Lady of Private Garden Masterlist 1

First Lady of Private Garden Masterlist 2

DO NOT ENGAGE IF YOU ARE NOT 20+

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

“Baby, are you absolutely sure that this is okay?” Jack asked you as he hovered over you holding the handcuffs and the key to unlock them with.

“Yes, how many times do I have to say it?” You responded waiting for him to put them on you, clearly growing annoyed, however, you loved how considerate he always was of you and always wanted to make sure that you were okay.

“I just want to make sure that you’re comfortable. You know that I never want to do anything that’s going to hurt you. That’s the last thing that I would ever want.”

“I know and I appreciate you asking me to make sure. I promise that I’m okay. You know that there isn’t too many things that I’m uncomfortable with.”

“I know, but the minute that changes, you tell me. You got it? Don’t sit here and suffer in silence.”

“I promise, baby. You have my word.”

“Raise your right arm up for me.” You did as you were told and since Jack had two pairs of handcuffs, one wrist occupied each one.

Jack placed the key on the dresser before starting to plant kisses along your body slowly making his way south. You leaned into his touch and he couldn’t help but to get a small smile on his face.

“Now you’re really not going to be able to run from me since you literally have nowhere to go. But let’s make this a little more interesting.”

“How?” You curiously asked before Jack reached into the first drawer of your bedside table and pulled out a blindfold.

“Do you trust me?” He asked you and of course you nodded without hesitation.

“With my life.”

Jack had now blindfolded you and he then went back to the task of planting kisses all along your body. He slowly slid down your black thong before throwing it across the room and didn’t have to worry about taking your bra off because that had been off before he decided to handcuff you.

He placed multiple kisses on your inner thighs and you began to squirm, growing impatient.

“Is my baby growing impatient?” Jack suddenly asked you and you simply nodded in response. You obviously couldn’t see anything, but felt Jack move and you couldn’t help but to wonder what he was doing.

“Just be a good girl and hold on for me. You know that I always take my time in order to make you feel good and tonight is no different.”

You quickly nodded and soon got your answer as he took one long lick across your folds and it was ice cold.

“Oh shit. Oh my gosh.”

“I would tell you to stay still, but it doesn’t really matter seeing as you’re handcuffed and completely at my mercy. But you still need to cooperate with me. Can you do that, pretty girl?”

“Yes.”

“Yes, what?”

“Yes, daddy.”

“That’s exactly what I thought.” Jack dove back in to guide his tongue across your folds while paying special attention to your clit and he then got the bright idea of placing an ice cube on it and slowly letting it melt to then suck it off you.

“Baby, this is about to be cold, I just want to warn you, okay?”

“Okay.” 

You braced yourself as you felt the cold sensation and immediately let out a small moan because it felt so good.

“Mmm.”

“How’s that feel?”

“It feels amazing.”

“Good, but it’s about to get even better.” Jack then caught the liquid that had melted along his tongue along your folds before tracing it back up to your clit and sucking.

At that point, you just knew that you were going to lose it.

“Shit, baby.”

Jack simply smiled before reaching up to pay special attention to both of your nipples and you felt the cold sensation gliding along both of your breasts before he would lean down to suck whatever had melted off.

He then began to play with each nipple as he rolled one in between his fingers while sucking on the other one before switching knowing that this would make you reach your peak faster.

Jack loved when you would moan in his ear and he thought that was one of the sexiest things that you ever did while he was pleasuring you.

When the ice had completely melted, he went back down to pay attention to your folds and entered one finger before also adding in the use of his tongue. Your back was starting to arch up from the bed with how much pleasure you were in and Jack quickly took it upon himself to insert another finger.

“Baby, I’m…. I’m…..” You breathlessly said and he nodded even though you couldn’t see him.

He simply kept fingering you while adding a third finger and sucked on your clit before you squirted all over his face.

“Damn, it’s Niagara falls combined with the Nile river down here.” Jack said and you couldn’t help but to laugh.

“My man is fine as fuck, so what did you expect?”

“Baby, I have something else I want to try on you.” He said as he reached up to kiss you and you eagerly kissed him back.

“I trust you so go ahead.”

You felt the weight of the bed shift and you assumed that Jack had gotten off to get whatever he wanted to use on you.

It was a minute later that you felt him crawling back onto the bed and felt the coolness of what you assumed was a chain laying on your chest.

“Can you guess what it is?” He curiously asked and at first you shook your head no before suddenly having an idea.

“Nipple clamps?”

“And we have a winner. You ready?”

When he saw you nod he immediately attached the right one first before going to the left and you wanted to moan with how good it felt even though he barely did anything.

Jack began to run his fingers along your folds and you bucked your hips wanting for him to do more.

“Hmm, someone’s eager.”

“Baby, come on.” You said in a whining tone which Jack immediately told you to stop.

“Come on, what? And stop whining because I’ll stop right now. Tell me what you want.”

“I want you in me.” You said in a louder voice, but trying not to scream knowing that Urban was probably trying to sleep.

“You sure?”

“Stop teasing me!”

“Remember, you can’t run like you normally do.”

“I don’t run and take the dick like a champ.”

“I beg to differ, but remember you said that.” Jack answered as he slowly eased into you, bottoming out making you both moan in pleasure.

“Fuck, you feel so good around me.” You heard him say as he slowly started to move.

You felt him put your legs on his shoulders and knew that you were about to be in for it as he increased his pace.

“Look at my pretty girl taking all this dick like the good girl she is. Keep those legs spread for me, baby.”

You simply nodded as you felt kisses being placed along your neck and him sucking on the skin beneath your collarbone.

“Babyyyy. Fuckkkkk.”

“Take that shit.”

Of course Jack had noticed you trying to move away from him and he would promptly pull you back every time.

You had done this for the last few minutes when he had stopped his movements leaving you confused.

“Babe?”

“What did I tell you about moving? You know what? I have an idea.”

You felt Jack playing with one of the handcuffs before you felt his hand then slide into it so that it was next to yours.

“Now you really can’t go anywhere. Now stop fucking moving.”

Jack then locked his hand with yours as his other hand was on your hip before he began pounding into you making you scream at the top of your lungs.

It took only a few more thrusts for both of you to hit your peak and as you were coming down from your high, Jack was placing kisses all along your body where he could reach before coming back up to place a sweet kiss on your lips.

“I need you on all fours next so let me…. Shit…”

“What’s wrong?” You curiously asked since you were still unable to see anything.

“Umm….”

“Jackman, answer your wife immediately.”

“I can’t find the key.”

“What do you mean you can’t find the key?! You just had it!”

“I know! I know! Just relax, baby. It’s fine.”

“How am I supposed to relax?! I’m handcuffed to my husband with a blindfold and nipple clamps on.”

“And you say that like it’s a bad thing and you know that I will never let anything happen to you.”

“I know but… baby call Urban because there is no way in the world you can look for the key with one hand and how high up our bed is from the floor.”

“He’s going to be pissed.”

“I know and will definitely never let us live this down but desperate times call for desperate measures.”

With his free hand, Jack was unable to unlock his phone and call Urban who picked up on the fourth ring.

“Hmm?”

“Urb, come to our room for a second.”

“I literally just fell asleep, what do you two want?”

“Just come here.”

“Fine.”

It took Urban another ten minutes to show up but when he did, he was looking on in disbelief.

“What the? What the actual fuck is going on?”

“Umm, me and wifey are handcuffed to each other and umm… I lost the key.”

“Your dumbass would do something like that.”

“Urby, just find the key, I’m freaking out and low key panicking.” You told him and you couldn’t see but he rolled his eyes. 

“I guess so since you're blindfolded and can’t see shit. Wait, are those nipple clamps?”

“URBAN, FOCUS!” You yelled as he held his hands up in defense as he went and looked for the key. 

Urban got on the floor and was moving around for a few minutes before you heard him get up.

“Okay, I found it.”

“Good now unlock us.”

“No, because you two interrupted my sleep with your nasty asses. So I’m keeping it and taking a nap. When I wake up, I’ll come back.”

“URBAN HENRY!” 

“URB! COME ON AND STOP PLAYING!” 

“Goodnight.” Urban said before running out of the room with the key in his hand. 

Both of you then sighed and was quiet for a few minutes before you then heard Jack’s voice.

“Baby?”

“Yes?”

“We might as well make the most of this so….. Another round?”

“It’s not like we can do anything else so might as well.”

"That's my girl." Jack quickly answered while beginning to kiss you. Without warning, he slowly eased himself into you while lifting your left leg to place around his waist to be able to go deeper.

You lost count of how many rounds the two of you went for before falling asleep. When the two of you woke up, you noticed that you weren't blindfolded anymore or handcuffed to Jack.

You looked to your left to see Urban placing the handcuffs and the key in the top drawer and caught his eye as he went to leave.

"Urby! It's light outside! You said a nap, not a full blown eight hours of sleep!" You said and noticed that Jack was starting to stir on top of you.

"But did you die? And besides I know yall went for multiple rounds when I left you there anyway so I should be hearing thank you Urby instead."

"Once he wakes up, I'm kicking your ass."

"Watch it because I have no hesitations to handcuff the both of you again."

All you did was roll your eyes in response as you noticed Jack woke up and lifted his head from your chest but not before placing tiny kisses along your chest.

"Good morning, baby…. Wait, how long were we handcuffed for!? URB!"

"If I did my math right, about eight hours." You muttered.

"You two are ridiculous and needed to deal with the consequences."

"Then I suggest you leave because we're not done." You said and Jack's eyes went wide.

"Wait, we're not?"

"Yeah, I'm outta here and don't call me for any other stupid shit." Urban said before leaving the room and closing the door.

You shook your head no as you moved to the end of the bed before getting on your knees and Jack simply smirked before standing up and going in front of you.

You saw the precum leaking and immediately went to trace your tongue from the base to the tip making him let out a small moan.

You went to grip him and Jack immediately stopped you.

"Who said you could use your hands? All I want is that pretty mouth of yours. As a matter of fact…."

Jack went over to the dresser and proceeded to take out the handcuffs and made you put your arms behind your back.

"And I promise not to lose the key this time." He said as he put your hair into a makeshift ponytail and you opened your mouth already knowing what was coming next as Jack began to face fuck you.

He was slowly moving in and out of your mouth at first and you could feel the river forming in between your legs. 

"My good girl sure knows how to please me, huh?" Jack asked you and all you could do was nod as a mix of spit was running out of the sides of your mouth and down onto your chest where the nipple clamps resided. Jack had taken them off in the middle of the night, but when you woke up and noticed that your hands were free, you guided them back on seeing as they were only lying to the side of you and that you could reach them.

Jack then increased his pace and was letting out a series of curses and you couldn't help but attempt to smirk.

That was one view that you never got tired of.

"Baby, keep that pretty little mouth open. You better not waste a drop."

You could tell that he was close and that it was just a matter of time before he came in your mouth.

"FUCK!"

You felt him release towards the back of your mouth and quickly swallowed it anticipating more.

It got to be so much that you couldn't swallow fast enough and some of it had leaked out the side of your mouth and ran onto your chest mixing with the spit that was already there.

Once he was satisfied with how much you swallowed, he removed himself from your mouth and simply reached down to bring you to your feet so that he could kiss you.

"I wasn't too rough with you was I?" He asked and you immediately shook your head no.

"Good, because now I need you on all fours. Get on the bed."

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[thelastlaff]

various easter eggs in toontown corporate clash sorted by location:

1. toontown central

- use the speedchat phrase “yeehaw” at the statue

- go to toon hall, click on the banana peel twice

2. barnacle boatyard

- ride the boat around 20 laps

3. ye olde toontowne

- touch the well

4. daffodil gardens

- gather 5 toons around the flower of doom in the middle of the maze

- go to the squirting flower on daisy drive, use the speedchat phrase “lets use squirt!”

5. mezzo melodyland

- jump on a drum 10 times in a row

6. the brrrgh

- touch all 5 ice cubes in the playground

- throw snowballs at steve the snowman and make him grow to his largest possible size

- go to mozzerella styx pizzeria and jump on all the tables without touching the floor (edit: if struggling with this use the shift key :D)

7. acorn acres

- swim downriver to the waterfall

8. drowsy dreamland

- use the speedchat phrase “i’m sleepy” 20 times

- go to talking in your sleep on pajama place, use the speedchat phrase “would you like some help?”

9. activities

- nameplates can be randomly dropped during activities (low chance)

- get 3 chests in treasure dive (trolley game)

10. cog HQs

- cog HQs reward backgrounds at tier 8 cog disguises

- get max fog in a CLO canon round

- plant puzzle (starts in the OCLO lobby, i suggest looking this one up for more info, there is no direct answer sheet so don’t worry about spoilers) edit: heres my map with the plant names labeled and it’s made more up to date :D

[neptunedada]

Gardening

Gently wiping off baby’s chin with a napkin and making a silly face at him so he stops fussing, reaching out to tickle his belly when he starts to giggle.

“Silly boy! Was that yummy?”

He gives me a big smile and a nod, reaching out to drink some of his water in his sippy cup.

Water, then juice, a strict rule in our house, even on special occasions!

I leave baby to play with his cars on the tray of his high chair while I wash off his plate in the sink, humming softly and smiling to myself as I hear his little voice going, “vrooom vroooom!”

I fill him up a fresh sippy of cool apple juice from the fridge, dropping a few ice cubes to keep it the right temperature for him.

He smiles as I hand it to him and eagerly drinks it, so quickly that I have to remind him, “careful, buddy, slowly, okay?”

Baby’s a good listener and does what I ask, the sweetest boy in the world.

It’s just us today with bubba off to work, but that’s okay because we have each other.

When I’m done cleaning up I lift him out of his high chair, holding him on my hip and giving a little boop to his nose.

“You gonna help daddy in the garden today, hmm?”

He nods excitedly, even though I know his version of helping is just playing in the mud and drawing little pictures for me on the stepping stones.

I appreciate it anyways, and I’m always sure to tell him so.

“You’re such a good boy.” I coo as I slip on my comfy shoes and place a hat on his head.

He whines for a moment as I adjust it, but doesn’t linger too long on it as we step out to the porch.

We make our way over to the pretty flowers and little produce garden, baby eager as ever to get to work making a mess.

I giggle softly and set him down, watching as he makes his way over to grab his chalk bin.

I get to work on the garden, checking the plants and tugging out the few weeds that grow, keeping a watchful eye on baby to make sure he’s alright.

When he’s done drawing he tugs on my jeans to let me know, pulling me over with a shy smile on his lips.

I pepper him with praises and give him a nice big hug, “look how pretty, what a good job! Thank you, baby, I love it!”

Baby holds onto me and I know what this means, it’s his turn to help me tend to the leaves.

He grabs his little gardening tools and settles down beside me, spraying the flowers to help them grow (though he’s mostly just digging up the ground to fill his pail with dirt).

I watch him and praise him, thanking him for helping me, making sure he knows I appreciate his help.

And before we know it it’s already noon, I hear his belly growling for some lunch. I finish up with my plants and give a five minute warning, waiting for him to finish up his playing, too.

And once he does he comes and takes my hand, following me inside to grab some food.

[erose-this-name]

Punishment.

Cult of the Lamb Ficlet because I lost control of my life again

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=⁂=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

Lamb and their right hand cat, Narinder, walk about the cult grounds discussing plans for new buildings.

Kallamar and Saleos walk by, the former passively rambling outloud about schemes he will never actually go through with to the latter who just nods along, with the same reverence and eagerness a dog might have toward its owner. Kallamar seems to look at Saleos the same way one might be looked at by their housecat. As little good as they're surely up to, neither god of death pays them any mind, as they have proved to be more harmless together than apart.

Lamb chats to Narinder while sketching vague blueprints, “I saw you at your siblings’ house earlier, Nari’.”

Narinder grunts, “... And?”

“Don’t tell me The One Who Waited has forgiven them already?” Lamb teases.

“Of course not! None of my siblings have my forgiveness, nor will they ever. But, that spider is hardly the same person who betrayed me, not anymore. No point punishing the innocent. No point in letting what little remains of their talents go to waste.”

Narinder chooses his words carefully, the Lamb has probably already gleaned from his thoughts that he went to see Shamura, but maybe he could hide his intent behind ambiguity. This is just another facet of the countless indignities and adjustments he has had to go through after losing his Crown.

“Pragmatic!” Lamb smiles, complimenting the cat. Then, why do you think of guilt, Narinder?

Leshy bursts from the ground before Lamb, startling the young god of death. The worm bares his teeth, gesturing with his seeing eye cane, “Horrendous cruel beast! Why does Heket have to tend to both the farms and the gardens!? And is the head chef? EXPLAIN YOURSELF, IMMEDIATELY!”

Narinder rolls his third eye and picks up the blueprint Lamb had been working on, checking the shrine dimensions and blood plumbing for mistakes or minor improvements. It’s a skill that is easy to learn, but takes eons of practice to master.

Lamb looks at the worm with a wide friendly smile, unsure of his angle. His chaotic thoughts do not help. “Because, Leshy… She’s an ex-fertility goddess of harvest. I know it’s a lot of work, and she said she was the god of famine, but she seems to retain some power or knowledge of the opposite, so I think she can handle-”

Leshy throws his arms up, “SO DO I! I AM THE GOD OF NATURE! LOOK AT ME! I’M LITERALLY PART PLANT! Heket’s domain is merely domestic crops. Allow me to tend to the flowers and the trees, and I will grow them better than she ever could. Those camellias will have no choice but to obey me, FOR I AM THEIR GOD.”

Lamb tilts their head inquisitively, reopening the wound hidden under their bell collar, “Huh, so that’s why you look like that. I always thought you were the god of chaos?”

“Chaos is nature! Plants are not meant to be grown in ugly rows, so called ‘weeds’ are not meant to be pulled up, my hedges not meant to be trimmed into cubes. Nature is chaotic, it’s people who inflict their order upon it.” Leshy balls his fist.

“But, weren’t you also technically the god of order?” Lamb raises a brow, discreetly checking to make sure they’re wearing the blood red fleece, today. Or at least the robes they stole from Narinder.

Leshy produces a flower from somewhere, likely thin air, and uses it as a prop, “I am! Order is nature! Have you ever considered a flower? The intricacies and mathematical perfection of their petals, that I painted? The perfectly rehearsed dance of an ecosystem in balance? Nature is ordered, it’s people who inflict their chaos upon it.”

“Uh…” Lamb smiles, incredulously.

“What? That made perfect sense, right Narinder? The vile lamb must also be stupid.” Leshy says, rolling his non-existent eyes and throwing an arm around Narinder’s shoulder.

Narinder shrugs him off, not seeming to give a shit.

Lamb says, “Thank you for your concern, Leshy, but I think our current camellia output is sufficient. We really can’t spare another lumberjack, especially one as talented as you.~”

The green worm glowers at the Lamb, bearing his teeth. He turns and storms off.

Narinder watches his brother walk off. He turns to the Lamb, “Why did you put Heket in charge of sustenance? She is not above poisoning, or worse, you are aware of that.”

Lamb giggles, dropping the façade and rubbing their neck, “Because working with food torments her, now she can’t eat anything. Not if it’s still solid. She’s still much too proud to do a bad job, though. And I’m not worried about her poisons, anymore.”

Narinder says, “Oh. She always was a glutton, I suppose.”

“You think I’m being cruel, Nari’?” Lamb says coquettishly, licking their own blood and ichor from their clawed fingers.

Narinder’s three eyes narrow at the Lamb, “Cease your reading of my mind. And, yes, of course I do. However, I did not say it was a bad thing. She deserves it. I imagine that is also why you have Leshy cutting trees down, instead of growing them? Scary, how much of my vindictiveness has rubbed off on you, once so innocent... and, come to think, this is also probably why I was made your ‘disciple’, wasn't it?”

The Lamb gives him a sharp smile, “Ehehehe! Now, I’m starting to wonder if you can read my mind. A fitting punishment, yea? Always by my side. So close to the object of your desire, yet forever powerless to take it…”

Narinder’s face turns red and he gets a nosebleed. “I HATE YOU, Lamb! You are horrible and evil and vile, I’m leaving now.”

The three-eyed cat runs back into his hut.

Lamb mumbles to themself, obliviously, “Huh? He’s still thinking I’m cruel. He must really want the Red Crown back, I better keep teasing him with it!”

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=⁂=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

As Leshy retreats to a secluded part of the cult grounds with a bottle of ‘very good’ wine he stole, to brood over the Lamb’s refusal, he groans to realize that he’s unfortunate enough for Kallamar to have already been there doing the same thing.

Kallamar smiles and waves, beckoning Leshy to sit beside him. After a few moments of Leshy not reacting, he speaks up, “Hello, Brother! Sit down, sit down! Still living with that mortal cat?”

Leshy sighs as he does so, “Yes. Still living in Heket’s basement?”

“Just because she built a floor above mine doesn’t make it the basement. It’s a ‘cellar’…” Kallamar clarifies.

“Rrrright.” Leshy brings his bottle to his lips.

“You know, it’s funny how you only act like a normal person when you’re drunk. You’re so much more genuine, this way. I much prefer it.”

Leshy spits out his wine, “W-what’s that supposed to mean?! I’M ALWAYS NORMAL!!! … So, anyways, how’s Shamura doing? If you ever need help taking care of-”

Kallamar cuts him off, “Oh, could you? That'd be great. Saleos hardly ever has time to help. Shamura's condition is… well they haven’t been getting any less lucid. They can take care of most things themself, these days. That’s actually what I was about to mention. Narinder came by the house today. Was asking to visit them.”

Leshy’s hand tightens around the bottle’s neck, “What? You didn’t let him, did you?”

“Of course not. Heket would’ve had my head if I did.”

“Huh… Why?”

“No idea, I can never read the guy. Maybe he feels bad? He used to be very close to Shamura, can’t imagine he wanted any of this to happen.” 

“Maybe… But why now? We’ve been living here for close to a decade-”

“Decades, actually. This year it's 28, for me. You've been here a lot longer.” The squid corrects.

Leshy sighs, “... ‘Decadessssss’. You know what I mean. Maybe that horrid little Lamb put him up to it. Seems to enjoy torturing us like that.”

Kallamar shrugs, “Shamura’s been asking about Narinder ever since.”

Leshy raises his tone, “Shamura doesn’t know any better. They don’t even understand what happened to them, half the time. Even when they still had the Purple Crown, they kept giving him ‘gifts’. As if nothing had changed.”

Kallamar swirls the red liquid around in his bottle, “I don’t know. You really don’t think it isn’t time to extend the olive branch? He’s in the same boat as us, now. To be honest, I don’t even blame Narinder. He did what any of us would have done in that situation.”

“That’s… surprising to hear from you, Kallamar.”

“I just wish I didn’t have to get caught up in the crossfire. And, isolating Narinder has only been driving him closer to the Lamb, somehow. They are our real enemy.”

Leshy rolls his nonexistent eyes, “Ah, there it is… I mean, I don’t disagree. I empathize with him. And I miss having him as a brother, before all of this. But, I don’t know if I could ever forgive him, not after all he’s taken from me. My existence is hell, because of him.”

“Isn’t that more because of the Lamb, Brother?”

“What? No. Don’t get me wrong, I despise the Lamb. But, it was Narinder who gouged out my eyes, who sicced that vile beast on me.”

“... so?” Kallamar raises a brow.

“W-what do you mean ‘so’? Look at me! What he did to me.” Leshy gestures to his bandaged face.

“He did the same to all of us, you don’t see me asking for pity.” Kallamar takes a drink.

Leshy laughs in Kallamar’s face.

“PFFHAhAHAHahah! NO! No-no, no, no. No. We are not the same. I will admit, Shamura received a far worse fate than I, though my own suffering outweighs that of everyone besides. Then, after mine, was Heket’s. Then Narinder’s. And only then, last of all, is you. He Who Waited merely tore off part of the outside fins of your ears, you are not even deaf, not completely… And, I don’t despise you for losing nothing, Brother, I detest you because you got off so easy because you were a coward then, and you won’t even admit it because you are a coward now.”

Kallamar shakes his head, “Lost ‘nothing’? I lost my crown, my cult!”

“That’s not what I’m talking about, but yes. You did, though I’m sure you cried and bitched the whole time instead of fighting like a man.  But, it’s not like you were depending on yours just to hear. Or to speak. Or see.” The worm growls.

“You weren’t exactly blind until becoming a mortal. Didn’t you say you could see with the Green Crown’s eye?”

“That… that wasn’t the same! Didn’t you ever try looking through yours!? The Crowns see only truth, that isn’t the same as seeing. Beauty. Is. Not. True. Natural beauty was once all I cared about bringing into the world, it was what gave my existence meaning, what brought me happiness… For centuries, I haven’t been able to remember what flowers look like. I know their fragrance, their feel, their shape, but their color? I am told camellias are red, red like blood. What is ‘red’, Kallamar? The Green Crown did not give me the emotion of red, not the association of blood and passion, not the striking vibrancy, it merely informed me of the wavelength of photons bouncing off chemical bonds in their pigments and the chemistry and evolution of those biomolecules, and I don’t even have that anymore. ‘Dappled sunlight trickling down from the canopy of Darkwood onto a glittering stream between mossy rocks’, these are only words to me. I can no longer imagine it, as I can’t think in images anymore, only in words and concepts… Every time that I feel cool breeze through my leaflets carrying the perfume of camellias, all I can think of is that I will spend eternity never again knowing their beauty. W-whenever my cat gives me one, I…” Leshy’s lip quivers, he shakes his head.

His head drops into his hands, the worm mumbles, “What’s even the point of living anymore? I want… I deserve death. But this vile, horrid, cruel beast won’t even let me die. They know how I feel, their Crown must show them, they know how torturous this existence is for me! And still they stand there, mocking me, with that horrible sadistic smile. Acting like nothing is wrong.”

Kallamar stares at Leshy, his stitched brow furrowing. “How dare you, Brother? How dare you think that you have the right to hate me, when I already hate myself? H-how dare you think so little of yourself as to deserve pity from someone as worthless as me, when you’re still you? Do you have any idea how much I envy you right now, Leshy? Long before all this, even when you were but a wyrmling barely in control of your Crown, I still envied you. Because, you’re right. I am a coward, and a fucking idiot, not even the Blue Crown could fix that about me, because I’m also so fucking stubborn. I never deserved godhood. But it came so naturally to you, you’re so damn confident, and brave, and fucking cool looking! Everyone loved you for it! Your followers were inspired by you, drawn to you! My cult never even respected me, only feared me… Except for Saleos, he’s somehow worse… I should’ve been proud of you, as your elder bloodbrother, but as worthless and horrid as I am, I felt only jealousy… and loathed myself for it… If you think your greatness was taken from you, I never had any to begin with. If you’d even care.”

Leshy stands up, mouth downturned, the moss on his cheeks caked with wet ichor. 

He punches Kallamar in the face.

The squid clutches the burst stitches across his face, “OW! What the hell, Leshy?”

Leshy sneers, “Ooh, you think you deserve pity for knowing you’re pathetic? Don’t you try to out-do my pain! Don’t you think you’re the only one that hates himself. If even you couldn’t tolerate your bullshit, why didn’t you just fucking man up and die!?”

Kallamar reaches for his bottle. Leshy hits him again. The squid falls back, over the log, and flat onto the ground. 

The worm screams, “You think what the Green Crown did to me ‘looks cool?’, I’m a tree! You can pass as a normal squid. I have to tell people I’m an abomination, because I am. I’m a monster that devoured souls and families, and enjoyed it. And you think that was a good thing? You think they loved me for it? I didn’t even know what love was! Did you really think that I would feel better if I knew you only hate yourself because you weren’t consumed by your Crown, like me? Because you were still a person underneath it?! Do you understand how lucky someone like you is to have Saleos? How little you deserve his forgiveness, his love? After everything he sacrificed to you, willingly? And every day, you spit in his face!”

Kallamar curls up into a ball as Leshy kicks him repeatedly, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to, p-please…”

Leshy stops, tears dampening his bandages. “Now… Saleos is going to tend to your wounds, you’ll talk his ears off about this, and he’ll still be on your side… and I’ll go home, and my cat will tell me all about how much he loves that benevolent Lamb for saving him from Darkwood. Fr-... from the s-sacrificial altar... For vanquishing that evil god of chaos…”

Kallamar looks between bloody, shaking fingers, “H-he… still doesn’t know?”

Leshy sits down, wiping ichor from his hands, sniffling. “No. Of course not… I’m a worthless coward.”

The Lamb watches them from the temple window, with a horrible sadistic smile.

=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=⁂=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=