#my cross to bear my hell to pay etc etc

[babextoken]

🦢 🥀 ⛓️ wip mood board 🖤🕸️🪞

vessel x f!plus size!reader

[utilitycaster]

Finally seeing Bells Hells/c3 biggest fans and supporters after 3 years saying, "Some of you are so afraid to criticise CR that you end making other people feel like shit for voicing their valid criticism. We are allowed to complain about media that we’ve invested so much time on and paying for 😐". Its ironic because JUST last week everything was perfect. Or c3 is perfect but all the other parties, breaks etc. Im like that IS c3. The Villian is fr MN and the party is tied to VM. C3 is all party

going to give the mean and sarcastic answer (not to you, to the people you're talking about) and then the thoughtful one because I think both are important to voice here

mean sarcastic answer is "actually Matt was homeless once so I can't believe you're resorting to leftist infighting and criticizing him like that? You can't criticize anything involving Bells Hells because all of the characters are queer and also Beau is a brown lesbian so it's really racist of you to be upset that she showed up in the charity one-shot and most of the Mighty Nein and Vox Machina have trauma so it's actually really problematic of you to be mad that they're showing up in the wrap-up? smh C3 fans are just mad this isn't The Bells Hells Search For Their Neighbor's Missing Cat In The Alps show."

The serious answer really is that like, yeah, this campaign has been The Moon Plot And Past Parties campaign the entire time. I'm not going to link my entire blog here but my archive is extensive and if you were to cross-reference my opinions over the course of the campaign you could see that I (and my many other allegedly evil Campaign 2 stan pals with which this fandom is crawling, as if we are apparently the invasive species here and not the bears in whose neighborhoods you built a cul de sac and tried to shoo out) started out with high hopes for a third campaign on the heels of two excellent prior ones. Our disappointment is that at every turn we had to lower our bar; forgive me if, after a campaign in which every time anyone else said "wow, fucked up that they yanked away the football, that's disappointing" you harassed and mocked us, no one has any sympathy when the campaign ends at, frankly, a not unsurprising place for it to end. It's openly been called the Avengers Assemble campaign by the cast. Like, actually, almost everyone else had the opinion of "I wish this campaign focused primarily on Bells Hells"/"I wish this campaign were more rooted in Marquet" from, frankly, the second that Vox Machina appeared if not earlier, and that's when a lot of the people currently melting down started watching. I have been here so long that the people sending me anon hate have had full turnover. And yeah, just last week everything was all going to turn out okay, and it's like while it's fair to have had more hope for the campaign around episode 50, if you're in the endgame and nothing's clicking, I think it's okay to say "well, I'll see this through to the end but here are the many failures of this campaign over all".

I think it's extremely valid if, when the people lobbied every insult and accusation they could think of at you when you criticized the campaign or any of its characters before 9:00 AM Pacific Time on Thursday, January 30th, 2025, suddenly find themselves realizing that yeah, this campaign has a track record of jumping around to other parties when Bells Hells should probably have been in focus, and that the character arcs were mostly cut short in favor of the singular moon plot and it's virtually impossible to end in a way that is entirely satisfying, though the world state will probably be intriguing and the characters will probably get some blandly happy endings in between cuts to Vox Machina and the Mighty Nein; one's reaction isn't "oh, you poor thing" but rather "We told you so." The party may have fucked around and never really found out. I will have to take my satisfaction that (as multiple mutuals who have seen this all unfold pointed out) the people who have used their fandom of this campaign to throw rocks at anyone they didn't like and feel morally righteous in doing so are reaping what they sowed. I have no control over the outcome of the end of this campaign but I can certainly control whether I have any sympathy for those who are reeling from a revelation most of us figured out months ago, and they've been so consistently awful to everyone else at every turn that I cannot say I do.

I think it's valid to criticize Critical Role. I've been doing so all campaign. I was against toxic positivity in the fandom during Campaign 2, and while I'm not entirely proud of everything I've done and said this campaign, at least I feel secure in never demanding anything from others I did not practice myself. If the fandom is better during a hypothetical Campaign 4 I think it will be in part because hopefully a C4 party won't be as much of an attraction for that kind of dish-it-out-and-never-take-it loser Bells Hells appealed to; and because hopefully those same losers will have either left, or learned a bitter lesson for whom they have only themselves to blame.

[vasyandii]

Sorry if this a very uncomfortable question but I'm just really curious bc what does Krueger think about the age gap of his relationship with Nak. Since it is considerably big and Nak is an adult just still she is a young adult and stuff hdjdjd idk sorry if it's rlly uncomfortable but ur ocxcanon makes me so curious about their relationship. Their such a good ship djdjd

Howdy! Thank you for the ask! As long as you ask nicely there's no such thing as a uncomfortable question :)

Sorry I haven't been keeping up with Asks recently, college just started and I haven't had time to draw my little doodles- so have just a visual for now; this is gonna be super headcanon heavy so bear with me :0

Krueger Thoughts

I think Krueger didn't really pay much mind to their age gap when they started being a couple.

Krueger mentally didn't change much after killing his parents, hell, he was emotionally stunted before that too. So he's kind of just been stuck at 27 for a while now.

He did worry initially if Nak likes him because they spend a lot of their time together and she thinks that automatically means she has to have romantic interest in him or if she likes him because he's the first guy she finds somewhat attractive.

So he quickly asked her directly to get it out of the way. It was more like a back and forth interrogation than asking the specific terms of their relationship.

It relieved Krueger significantly seeing that Phayvanh isn't dependent on him. She's still able to be her own person with or without him. She pays her own bills, has her own place, she's good at her job, she gets to hang out with her friends, and she tries her best to communicate clearly with him, etc.

Krueger often made sure everything in their relationship was set at her own pace that she was comfortable with. He doesn't want to cross any boundaries with her or force her into doing something she doesn't want to.

There's not really a power dynamic between them since Nak has more experience in terms of being in the field (Documented and Undocumented) she's not some naïve woman who got shipped off to Urzikstan.

Phayvanh could be years older than him and he'd still date her because he just genuinely likes her.

(hopefully this helps, it's been a while since I've written)

[scryarchives]

𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 - 𝐠𝐨𝐣𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮

gojo satoru and himiko nakamura have always been rivals, however, working on the same movie has put himiko at her limits.

my masterlist !

✭ pairings: gojo satoru x oc actor! au

✭ warning: gojo's probably out of character, the ending's rushed as hell. actor au.

✭ author’s note: got sick of this just sitting in my drafts tbh

✭ word count: 1.5k words

disclaimer: i’m not of japanese descent and am unfamiliar with japanese honorifics, etc. feel free to correct me!

Himiko hated everything about him. She hated his brilliant blue eyes that glimmered like ocean waves, his charming grin that brought every woman to his knees, and most of all, she hated that he knew how to press every one of her buttons. Every. Single. Time.

At this point, it was well known that the two were rivals in the industry, and it was entertaining for all to see; both actors and fanbases.

And unfortunately, it was during their meeting for a chemistry read that Himiko found out that Gojo Satoru was, a little too eagerly in her opinion, playing the main character. She wouldn’t have minded that fact one bit if it weren’t for the luck she had, scoring her role in the film as his love interest. ‘Quite the dastardly bit of luck,’ she groaned to herself.

She felt her eye twitch as he waltzed into the studio with his cocky smirk as per usual, it was rare to ever see him without it. His circular dark blue sunglasses didn’t hide the mischievous shine in his eyes, and Geto Suguru walked in, his brown eyes grazing over every little detail of the studio. The two were known to never be apart, almost appearing in every film together, with a rare few exceptions.

However, the moment Gojo’s sky-blue eyes met her lilac ones, she knew from the way his smile grew that he wouldn’t be leaving her alone anytime soon.

“If it isn’t little Miss Nakamura!”

“Impale me now,” Himiko sighed, turning to her agent, Chizuru. “Must I work with this… moron?”

Chizuru scrolled through her phone, her thumb flicking the screen, tucking the silky stray strands behind her ear as Himiko’s lilac eyes stabbed into Gojo’s lanky figure, his best friend, another fellow actor with black hair and brown eyes lurking behind him. A click of Chizuru’s tongue was enough to tell Himiko everything.

“Unfortunately, yes…” Chizuru winced, “The movie’s set to be one of the biggest names this year, and if you back out now, it’s going to be a great loss for both your reputation and in terms of revenue. It’s a little late for that in my opinion.”

The shorter woman then leaned closer to Himiko, whispering in the fierce lady’s ear, her voice barely audible over the blasting of the air conditioning, “Besides, as your cousin, I just say go for it. Grit your teeth and bear it – in the end, you’re probably never gonna see his face again.”

Himiko dragged her manicured hand down her face, her black nails softly scratching against the side of her face in irritation, her lilac eyes rolled back at the pesky white-haired man in the room. 

“Bargain for me,” Himiko sighed, crossing her arms as she made her way to the seats where the men all stood around, and she watched Gojo interact with the directors and producers with a ridiculous amount of energy that he could’ve been mistaken for a child in a candy shop, “I’d like a higher pay as compensation for dealing with his stupidity. I’ll add a small percentage to your pay as thanks for handling my nonsense.”

Chizuru sighed, fixing her bun the slightest, pocketing her phone, “You got it, Miss Nakamura. Just don’t try to tear his face off while I’m gone.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” The star huffs, hearing her younger cousin leave the room with the ‘click!’ of the studio’s door.

Seeing how much the man-child she despised with a burning sense of rivalry managed to light a fuse of anger in the producer, Utahime Iori; an already well-established actress often known to be patient, amused the lilac-eyed actress. At least she wasn’t the only one who felt a tingling sense of irritation at the sight of Gojo Satoru.

Himiko felt her irritation build as Gojo sauntered his way towards her, his friend watching from the corner of the studio, his arms crossed as he watched Gojo’s antics towards the irked actress.

“Nakamura! Have you watched my latest movie? It’s a box office hit, as per usual,” Gojo smirked, Himiko’s hands on her hips as she raised her eyebrows.

“No, I didn’t watch it. I don’t waste my time on cheap catchphrases and explosion effects, Gojo,” Himiko huffs, Gojo opens his mouth again to say something back, but the clearing of a throat pulls him out as he turns to the blonde man in the room.

Nanami Kento, the director of the whole film, rubbed his temples in annoyance, his baritone voice muttering silent curses at Gojo before beginning with a tone of a sigh.

“Please, Gojo,” Nanami sighed. “Let’s get started on the chemistry read between the both of you.”

Gojo shrugged with a smile, “No objections here!”

Reluctantly, Himiko sat herself at the table, joining the younger director and the thorn in her side. Despite Nanami being younger, she admired him quite a bit, and it was enough to keep her around for the movie – with the exception of the paycheck, of course.

Himiko eyed Gojo’s partner-in-crime, Geto Suguru, as he sat on the couch behind them, her thumb pointing back at Suguru with her voice low towards Nanami, “What’s he doing here?”

“Moral support, ever heard of it, Nakamura?” Gojo smiled over at Himiko with a teasing smile, leaning closer to whisper in her ear. “Don’t worry about him, he’s harmless.”

Himiko grimaces, gently pushing Gojo with two of her fingers, Geto snickering from behind them in amusement. He could clearly see why his best friend liked to irritate her, and she made it all the more fun by not lashing out like Utahime does. Her annoyance with Gojo’s antics was like a pressure cooker, building up until it exploded.

“Now, we’ll be recording this whole session,” Nanami spoke, dismissing Gojo’s antics, “We’ll let you know when we start rolling the cameras. I assume you both have memorised your lines?”

“Of course, who do you think we are, amateurs?” Gojo chuckled, not missing the way Nanami rolled his eyes.

“Then we’ll start in three… two… action.”

Himiko takes a deep breath before turning to Gojo, running her hand through her hair, getting into character, her expression morphing the moment her eyes meet Gojo’s.

He can almost feel his heart wrench with the hurt in her eyes, and he sees exactly why she’s made it as far as she has as a rising actress. The crack in her voice really sells it all for him.

“So what now?” She whispers, her eyes filled with betrayal and ruin, “You’re just gonna take off and leave me alone again?”

Tears began to appear in her eyes, and Gojo felt his heart lurch seeing her pretty lilac eyes all glossy and shiny, tears falling from her eyes that glimmered like amethysts. His hands reached up to touch her cheeks, his expression softening into a matching one of heartbreak.

“Baby, that’s… that’s not it at all,” He shakes his head, his voice soft. “I promise, I promise I’ll come back. I could never leave you, not even if I tried.”

“Then stay.”

Gojo couldn’t tell if it was the way she leaned into his palm when she said it, or if it was her watery amethyst eyes, but it made a knot grow in his stomach. He tucks her ebony hair behind her ear, cupping her cheeks as his thumb swipes over her waterline.

“I’ll stay,” He whispered, “Just for tonight. Just for tonight, I’m yours.”

“I don’t want it to be just for tonight,” Her hand clasped his, tearing it away from her face as she entwined her fingers with his, “I want to be by your side as long as you’ll have me, whether it’s for months or years.”

Himiko’s heart fluttered like a bird in her chest having Gojo’s blue eyes staring so intently at her, so gently, as though just the slightest touch of his fingers would break her.

She couldn’t deny that he was attractive, it was a worldwide fact at this point – however, Himiko refused to boost Gojo’s ego further, even if she couldn’t help the pink blush that grew on her cheeks as Gojo’s face neared hers.

“Then I guess we’re stuck together for a long time,” He cupped her cheeks again, leaning down to gently press his forehead on hers. Himiko’s breathing hitched as he softly placed his lips on hers.

She felt her eyes slowly close and her lips glide over his soft ones, their kiss soft and gentle, and she felt herself get lost in his touch, letting herself lean into his touch as he still cupped her face.

“And, that’s a wrap,” Nanami called out, the two actors pulling away, Himiko’s cheeks dusted with a warm shade of pink as her frown returned, clearing her throat into her fist. She could feel Satoru’s eyes on the back of her neck as she turned back to Nanami, smiling at him as she put on her façade of confidence.

Utahime’s was one of disgust, but really, when was she ever not disgusted at Gojo?

“That concludes today’s session, so you’re both free to go. Thank you,” The blonde-haired man curtly nodded his head. He didn’t say much, only turning to Utahime as the two began to talk in hushed whispers, Geto lingering around as Himiko dashed out, Gojo following hot on her trail.

Neither began to question why they returned on set a few weeks later, holding hands, and a scarf around Himiko’s neck despite the warm weather.

taglist: @mooncleaver @underwateredwrld @mcmisbehaving @neteyamrealgf @khany2026 @tinkerbelle05 @iheartamajiki @sad-darksoul @yunymphs @cindol @rrairey @yurislotusgarden @kesshavx

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[dwollsadventures]

D&D Non-Christian Afterlife

Dungeons and Dragons has always had very Christian-inspired afterlives, demons, and devils. In 1st edition the realms were simply called Hades, Hell, Tartarus, etc. On the one hand, Christianity’s morbid fascination with eternal torment has provided a lot of material to work with. I myself mined Dante’s Inferno for geography in the image above. But, how do you reconcile that with a non-Christian pantheon of deities? I’ve already discussed devils and demons here, but this will be about Hell itself.

Dante’s Divine Comedy is all about a spiritual journey through the three afterlives with semi-divine guides. Whether he knew it or not, he was echoing an ancient Italian myth in his works. The Etruscans believed that, after one died, they had to journey to get to the afterlife. This is only recorded in mosaics inside of tombs, but it shows the soul crossing vast distances, even across waters, to get to their final destination. They’re accompanied by a variety of figures. Some are winged vanthi, some are torch-bearing culsans, and some are horrible blue-faced monsters brandishing spears, keys, or boat rudders. These figures guide the soul on their journey. A few are shown as defending the traveling soul from horrible snake-footed monsters intent on stopping them. In the end they arrive to their destination across the waters.

Combining this with the Inferno, we get a Hell that is compatible with a non-Christian theological framework for our D&D setting. The soul is transported from the grave to the crown of the afterlife by psychopomps. From there they walk through the layers of Hell as migrants, not prisoners, with devils acting as stewards, guides, and protectors. The devils themselves are somewhat divine, and are not native to the plane. The original inhabitants are the demons. Demons are both against the gods and mortal souls and will do whatever is in their power to stop them. They inhabit the wildest lower parts of Hell. Within the wilderness of Hell there are bastions of rest of the journeying souls in the form of devil marquis (border counts) and their fortified castles. The very lowest layer is the calm black lake of the dead. Here the dead will sail, either by paying the ferryman or making their own ships and sail off into the afterlife. Of which different cultures have their own opinions. The one thing everyone can agree on is that the entrance to the afterlife is in the West, beyond the horizon.

I’ll be using this for my 1st edition Monster Manual drawing project. How Lias will get to the afterlife... we’ll see.

[bonjour-rainycity]

Making Amends

Summary: Five years, you thought he was gone for good. After the War, he disappeared. Now, after months of zero contact, he shows up at your bridal salon. A somewhat bitter Reader and a post-FATWS Bucky

Pairing: Bucky x F!Reader

Word count: 2381

Warnings: Mentions of past violence and killings, adult language

I sigh, securing the train of the dress so it doesn’t drag against the floor. The dress is stunning, as they all are. This one—pouffy, ivory, grand—has a bateau neckline and falls to the floor in a long, glittering train.

The glitter gets everywhere.

I bend down, trying to wipe some of it off my pants leg, then work on my blazer. Every day, only black clothes. It’s tradition, but a stupid one — the glitter stands out on my clothes more than it does on the white dresses.

“Miss, someone’s here to see you.”

I grit my teeth, digging my hands into the fabric of the dress. The receptionist is young — barely out of her teens, really — and still quite new at her job. She, like others, disappeared on that awful day five and a half years ago.

The day I lost everything.

And she’s here today because of my friends’ sacrifices.

I try to remind myself to be patient. “We’re appointment only, Lydia. Tell her to call, make an appointment, and come back then.”

“R-right,” she stammers, and I can hear the bottoms of her heels scraping against the floor as she shifts her weight. “It’s just—well, he said it’s really important, and wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

That gives me pause. He?

As a product manager at a bridal salon, my day is mostly spent in the company of women. Brides, their mothers, bridal parties, wedding planners, etc. There’s the occasional fiancé, father, brother, friend come to support, or a groom shopping for a dress, but overall, men tend to stand out.

“Fine, send him in,” I allow. It’s obvious he’s not listening to Lydia, but I know I’m more intimidating than she is. I’ll tell him to schedule an appointment. “And then do me a favor — there’s a list of designers on my desk upstairs. Can you give their offices a call and update the contact info for each brand representative?”

She sounds relieved. “Sure, no problem.”

As the sound of her heels meeting the ground fade away, I breathe in the sweet, floral-scented air. We’re under-booked today. There are only a few brides occupying our east fitting rooms, so I’ve decided to spend my afternoon in the west, making everything look perfect for the weekend ahead. Having this section alone — just me, the soft piano music playing over the speakers, and the dresses — is almost peaceful.

It would be peaceful if I were anyone else.

I continue to straighten the dresses. Everything needs to be perfectly spaced, meticulously tucked and folded to make each dress impressive in its own way. There’s no room for imperfection, here.

The sound of heavy boots clicking on the floor rings through the empty room. “Hey, Doll.”

My body runs cold.

That voice. I know it well.

My mind flashes to late nights, stealing smiles and kisses, tight hugs, adoring eyes.

And then falling to the ground in grief. Changing outfits to attend my second funeral of the day. His. And, after years of grieving, healing, and suffering through, one chance to fix it all. The joy of having him back. Locking eyes on the battlefield.

And then nothing.

Nothing.

All my air leaves me in one, quick, sigh. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

I turn, both dreading the sight and longing for it.

And just like that, standing between two rows of eggshell and pearl and ivory, he’s here.

Dark denim jeans, a deep blue shirt—long sleeve, knowing him—a grey button-up open on his chest, and two thick gloves, despite the summer heat.

I cross my arms.

He purses his lips together and raises his eyebrows, crossing one foot over the other casually. “So, bridal, huh?”

I feel my jaw clench. “I’ve got to make a living, don’t I? Evidently you do, too.” I can’t stop the bitterness from seeping into my voice.

He sighs that long-suffering sigh, one that tells me he’s more resigned than upset. “I wanted to come back.”

I turn my attention back to the dresses, walking down the row of gleaming white. “No one was stopping you.”

He turns to face me as I continue my inspection of each and every gown. “It’s not that simple. I—I was working hard. I had to get freed from him.”

I grit my teeth, fighting the urge to feel something. But of course, I do. Ever since I’ve known Bucky, he’s been wrecked by the things he’s done and terrified he’ll be called to do them again.

Terrified that he’ll lose his mind once again to the assassin.

When I saw him on TV, in a random news report from months ago, I’d broken down into sobs. I’d fallen to my knees and said prayer after prayer of thanks. Because the clouds had faded from his eyes. The fear, the ever-present dread, was gone. He stood taller, more assured —

Happier.

I knew then, that somehow, he’d gotten the Winter Soldier out.

I bend down, fluffing layers of crinoline in a ballgown. “You’ve been in the news.”

He hears the accusation in my voice. You’ve been back for months.

He approaches me slowly, coming to stand in front of me as I straighten. “I had a job to do.”

“What, the new Captain America doesn’t allow cell phones?”

He ignores the jab. “Doll, I had to wait to make sure, to be sure, but I’m safe, now. I’m not him anymore.”

“Bucky, I always felt safe with you,” I whisper, the emotion nearly winning. “I loved you more than anything. And despite what you said — that you loved me, too — you just left. Five years I waited for you. I didn’t think there was any way I would ever see you again, and then by some miracle, after so much loss, you came back! We fought in a war together. We killed. And we won. And then you disappeared. It’s been six months! I-I mean, I hate to think the worst, Bucky, but I really thought—” I cut off my words then, unable to continue without dissolving into tears.

His jaw tightens in that heartbreaking way it does when he’s sad, and he reaches forward. When I don’t protest to his gloved hand on mine, he pulls me into a hug. I want to melt into him. I want to collapse under nearly six years of unresolved grief, stress, worry, and let him hold me up, let him bear this burden for just a few minutes.

But that’s not the way I’m made.

I’ve entrusted my heart to him too many times.

And every time, I’m left alone and broken.

I push myself out of his arms, wiping my tears away quickly. Once again, the dresses act as my anchor, my distraction. I gather one in my arms, crossing the aisle to re-hang it in its proper place.

Bucky watches from a distance.

His hands are tucked into his pockets, and he looks at me sadly for a while before his eyes turn to the ground.

Silence falls between us. The only noises are the coos of elated brides and their adoring guests coming from the east side of the building.

After a while, Bucky raises his head towards me. “Does working here make you want it?”

I sigh. He can’t do that. Can’t come in here after so much time away with zero contact and then casually ask me stupid questions. “Want what?”

“You know,” he shrugs, leaning against the receptionist’s desk. “It. A wedding, a marriage, a…life.”

I purse my lips, shaking my head. I reach to adjust a hanger slightly out of my arm span, trying my hardest not to sound sad. “I’m not the kind of girl you marry, Buck. Not anymore.”

He scoffs, making a face. “What does that even mean?”

I turn on him, more than done with this conversation. “Exactly that! I see it every day — brides come in here, all starry-eyed, happy, innocent. They’ve got love, or at least the excitement of planning their ‘big day,’ and they just glow with all the life in them. I don’t have that, not anymore. I—” I lower my voice, gritting my teeth against the emotion that attempts to fight through. “I’ve killed people, Bucky. For a long period of time, that’s all I did. And, look, I’m really, really happy for you being able to heal and move on and be freed, but I can’t do that. I can’t come back from who I turned out to be.”

“That’s bullshit. You did what you had to do.” He pushes himself off the receptionist’s desk, adamant. “Every life you took was to stop the slaughter of others. You can’t blame yourself for that.”

“I can.”

We stare each other down.

He’s always had a good stare.

Steady, intimidating, unwavering. It’s like he can see into the depths of your soul and know he can outlast you.

But I work with furious mothers of the brides.

I raise an eyebrow, showing him I will not back down from this challenge.

He blinks and moves his gaze past my right shoulder. Something shifts in his eyes. “You’ve got a client.”

I force my expression to soften, maneuvering around Bucky to grab the clipboard from the receptionist’s desk. I give him a look that clearly says do not move, and hurry to the front door to welcome the bride and her guests in. Amidst the flurry of excited chatters, gushing about wedding plans, and a clear description of what she does not want, I check them in on the clipboard and take them to the east wing to meet a consultant. When I return, Bucky is exactly where I left him.

He smirks at me. “What the hell was that? Your voice rose like three octaves.”

I roll my eyes. “It’s called customer service.”

He shrugs, leaning against the desk in a way I should not find ridiculously attractive. “Well, why don’t I get any of that?”

I grit my teeth. “Because they are going to buy a dress, which will pay my salary, which will make me happy. You on the other hand, have caused me nothing but anger, sadness, and worry.” I blink, absently shocked that all that truth escaped despite my best efforts.

Something flashes in Bucky’s eyes—regret, maybe—but he covers it well, tilting his head to the side and keeping his playful tone. “Really? Nothing but that? Gosh, I must have been a terrible boyfriend.”

I dig my teeth into my lower lip, staring down at my clipboard. It’s been six months. You may as well continue with the honesty. You don’t know the next time you’ll have a change to talk to him like this. “Buck…” I approach him slowly, buying myself time. Too soon, I come to stand in front of him. “You were a great boyfriend. I…” I sigh, shaking my head. “I thought you were it. I didn’t want anyone else. And we were happy, overall. You know—up until you disappeared without so much as a text and ignored me for six months.”

A muscle twitches in his cheek. He leans forward, locking his eyes with mine. “We were good together. I loved you, more than anything, I—well Doll, I still love you. And look, I know I’ve messed up. In more ways than seems is humanly possible, but I,” he sighs, shaking his head. “I’m as clean as I’m ever gonna get. I shouldn’t have disappeared without warning. I should’ve called when I left Wakanda. I should’ve let you hear from me rather than seeing me on the news. I should’ve come back and done the work to rebuild what I broke. I’m sorry. I really am.”

I feel the clipboard digging into my stomach. I don’t move. I stare at him, terrified of the way his words, the honesty in his eyes, makes me react. Too easily, my walls are coming down. “What did you come here for?”

“I—just,” he digs his hands into his pockets, sighing lowly. “I’m back in town. And I’m here to stay for a while. If you’d allow it, I’d like to try to make amends.”

Don’t do it, I beg myself. Don’t set yourself up for more pain.

In the face of my silence, he nods slowly, taking on a look of sad understanding.

“I work till seven.” The words rush from my mouth before I can stop them, before I can think of the consequences. I grip the clipboard even tighter.

Bucky raises an eyebrow, the start of a smile tugging at the edge of his lips. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” I nod, my heart racing at the prospect of being with him again, of maybe fixing things. “I live in the same apartment.”

He grins fully now, but at my stern look, attempts to wipe it off his face. I’m still mad at him, he shouldn’t get too comfortable yet.

But the light doesn’t leave his eyes and, despite my fear that this will all turn out terribly for me, I feel my own lips threatening to turn up.

He pushes himself off the desk, standing closer to me than I think either of us intended. “Can I take you out?”

I release a long breath, not moving from my spot despite our proximity. “Yes.”

He nods slowly, not pulling his gaze from mine. “It’s a date.”

“It’s a trial period,” I correct, unable to keep myself from teasing him a little.

He tilts his head to the side, laughing indulgently. “Alright, I deserve that. Then, sure, I’ll pick you up at eight for our trial period.”

He smirks cockily at me, winking in that way he knows makes my knees weak, before turning and swaggering to the door.

Despite our play, he’s not getting off this easy. There’s a lot we have to work through, and we might not even be compatible anymore — he knows that, too.

But for just this moment, I allow myself to enjoy feeling comfortable with him, joking like we used to. When his gloved hand reaches for the doorknob, I call after him, keeping my tone light. “You’re on thin fucking ice, Barnes.”

He turns his head to mine, nodding solemnly in a way I didn’t expect. “I know, Doll.”

A/n Whoops, couldn’t get this one out of my head after seeing Bucky in FATWS, so here’s some angst, bitterness, and hopefully a little hope! 

|masterlist|

[mikaze-discord]

HEAVENS: Love letters

Soooo this is the last of the love letter, I really must reiterate how thankful I am to the people who responded to my message. Specially thankful for the people who ended up writing for one of the boys, all of the love letter writers are so cool. If you wanted to write your own love letter for your oshi then feel free too!! Utapri Tumblr is kinda dead.... but! I hope you enjoyed the love letters

Please enjoy under cut!!!!!!!!!!!!

EIJI OTORI 

From Anon:

Eiji Otori is another member of HEAVENS and he is a down-to-earth type of character. One can say he is a cinnamon roll as he looks out for HEAVENS and his brother, Eiichi. Eiji talks in a formal manner to people outside of HEAVENS and addresses them by their surname like the time he worked with Tokiya for Mighty Aura, or when he was working with Camus and Masato for Feather in Hand. Around HEAVENS, Eiji talks casually, calling them by their first name. He is very mindful of other members of HEAVENS and Eiji keeps an open mind for ways to improve his skills as an idol and to help out his bandmates come to a solution where both sides agree. Eiji speaks very fondly of the people he works with formality and a lot of respect.

What I love about Eiji is his relationship with his brother, Eiichi Otori. The two have a strong bond as Eiichi looked after and took care of Eiji when growing up. The two of them are inseparable and do a lot together while looking after each other. Personally, their sibling bond is what I wish to have with my sibling as well, even though we're complete opposites like day and night! Their interactions are easily seen throughout the anime, you can even see their sibling bond show the most through HEAVENS Radio as Eiichi and Eiji are the co-hosts. If there is anything that I'd like to know more about Eiji, it would be about his hobby, gardening. He has a lot of knowledge on plants and perhaps agriculture. It'd be nice to see HEAVENS talk about their hobbies one day. But all in all, Eiji is a great character that I appreciate with a heart of gold!

From Anon:

Eiji Otori, the 4th member of HEAVENS is one of my two most favorite characters in Utapri. I was originally drawn to his kind and gentle demeanor, that made him such an easily lovable character. He was introduced in the 4th season of the anime in the cross idol unit episodes. The way he treated Tokiya besides knowing he was part of the rival idol group ended up becoming an essential part of Tokiya’s later character growth. Although Eiji is meant to be a foil for Tokiya’s character their personalities are completely polar opposites, their devotion to wanting to be an idol being one of the only similarities besides level headedness. Eiji is his own character, right down the way he speaks to the way he sings. Eiji seems to always carry the group in a loving and family-like way, even going as far as having domestic hobbies like gardening and baking. We always see him and even hear the way he interacts with the other members of HEAVENS on the radio show as if they were an inseparable family. Eiichi, his older brother and the leader of HEAVENS loves him in a way that is so complex but Eiji will always love him back with every fiber of his being to the deepest parts of his soul. There is a deep connection between the brothers that is so beautiful that even poetry couldn’t express, it’s more profound then words can show. It’s a bond they share that only they know, like a secret.

However, even then there is so much more about Eiji that makes him such a wonderful character. When it comes to myself, Eiji hits a bit close to home in a more personal way. Perhaps that is also a factor in why I love him so much. I empathize with him and I can see through his eyes in ways only a younger sibling would know. As a younger sister to a sibling who has always been in the spotlight in some form of way with a big presence, I always lived in her shadow, but I admired her and cared about her above anything else. The way Eiji feels about Eiichi is something that I can personally relate with and understand. Eiichi is an essential part of Eiji’s character and the anime does not lack to show this, nor does it lack to show that Eiji is just as much an essential part of Eiichi’s character. It’s more obvious in the radio show that is hosted by the two brother but it’s not fully ignored either in the anime. I love how Eiji interacts with all of the characters, and seems to find ways to treat everyone with kindness even if they aren’t kind to him in return. He admires those who show a deep love for the things he does, and respects those who are more experienced then he is. He’s always eager to learn

and please. He’s the kind of person you’d always want around and you’d want a hug when things get rough. Eiji is definitely the most pure hearted character of all the Utapri characters. And, I’ll always stand by that through and through.

VAN KIRYUIN

From @whereisvanderwood:

Kiryuin Van. Where to start? He’s cocky. He’s cocky as all hell. There’s something in his air that is poised yet undignified. Childish yet mature. The man is founded on juxtaposition, not dissimilar to a painting of Picasso. His ability to be unique in an industry that begs for individuality, to rise above a tidal wave of competition and stand apart from other fish in the sea, is awe-inspiring. Expectation is dead to him; though the oldest member of Heavens, the weight of bearing the role as ‘most mature’ or the ‘parent’ of the group couldn’t be further from his concern. He is only any dimension of himself he wants to be at any given time. Dumb bitch by morning, bad bitch by night. Much like his bandmates, his confidence and intimidating aura is unwavering. He claims his victory before a race begins, and I couldn’t say if that undying faith in oneself is a skill or a sin. Whatever it is, he owns it. He shamelessly, unapologetically owns who he is and shares it with his fans, friends and enemies.

Also, he’s hot. He’s very appealing to the human eye. His ruggedness reminds me of a warm blanket in winter. His voice, oh his voice. If the world was about to blow up and he just said “No it won’t”, in his own way, I think I’d believe him. Regardless of what he says being juvenile or mature, he’s always authentic. No sugar coats, no little white lies, only genuity. As just said before, he is who he is and wouldn’t change for anyone if it wasn’t in his own best interest. Who couldn’t love a guy like that?

YAMATO HYUGA

From @kusagiiiii:

I'll be honest, I used to forget Yamato exists alot LMAO I fell in love with him when I was looking at a HEAVENS group photo! I think he is a very stronk,very cute and a very soft boy! in some ways haha he's my type

I honestly wish there would be more story on the HEAVENS boys since they all seem like they had a pretty rough past so yee that's basically it~

From Sammy:

Everybody, listen up! It’s Sammy here! Are you ready for some strong appreciation? Let’s shout it out! Yeah!!

Where do I begin when it comes to Yamato? It took me a while to actually like him. At first, I wasn’t a fan of how he was when he first showed up in the anime. I still remember when Yamato was one of the few HEAVENS members people really didn’t like or care much for, next to Eiichi and Nagi.

I used to be one of those people too with Yamato. I found him to be very stubborn, but over time after listening to HEAVENS Radio; The Drama CDs; Watching Maji Love Kingdom, etc… I came to realize there’s so much more to him.

I’ve learned a lot more about him, especially through role-playing as him, and my love for Yamato skyrocketed. Even with all the new content that’s been coming out for HEAVENS lately like Black Garden and Endless Score, my love grows even more every day. Yamato sneaked his way up to being one of my best boys.

Yamato is HEAVENS’ Strongest member. (Seriously, how the heck does this boy train everyday and do so much of it?!) He’s not always aggressive and violent. He’s actually a really thoughtful person who cares about his friends a lot, even being very protective of them. Yamato is the kind of person that’ll immediately stop what he’s doing, and only think about how to help the other person feel better.

A lot of things tend to be overlooked for him cause of how he’s written in the anime, and there’s fans who only pay attention to that. Not even giving the extra content a thought or a single glance.

As Ryuya’s younger brother, Yamato has his own insecurities, especially since he’s always seen as just a shadow. He’s been trapped in darkness where he feels he’s not good enough to be appreciated and loved as his own person. He doesn’t know what to do and which path to take. Yamato only became an idol just to defeat and finally be better than Ryuya at something. I feel that goal is still there, but it’s not a major one like before. Now, Yamato has people like the other members of HEAVENS, the angels, and the other idols. He found his light and happiness.

Overall, Yamato is the kind of person he wants everyone to be proud of. He wants to always share his strongest power and energy, carrying the burden of everybody’s smiles. Wanting to see those around him happy and be the best they can be.

Another part that I really like about Yamato is whenever he gets embarrassed. I can’t help, but find that really cute cause it’s something we don’t see or hear out of him a lot.

There’s also the times he demonstrates how much he loves food. Even though he overeats and knows he can’t help it when he’s hungry, I really liked when Yamato stated that if eating makes you happy, go for it. Just make sure you train afterwards to burn off calories. It helps people feel good about themselves.

Even the times when Yamato struggles with difficult words, specifically English and kanji. It’s embarrassing for him to admit, but he knows he’s not good at that sort of thing. What I really like about this is HEAVENS is always willing to help him, even Tokiya and Cecil. They help keep things simple and easy for Yamato to understand.

There’s a lot you can say I just simply vibe with when it comes to Yamato, and I love him. Hope everyone enjoys this long appreciation of this strong boy, and I hope you all love him too!

SHION AMAKUSA 

From Anon:

When I saw Shion for the first time, he caught my attention with his beautiful appearance. His cream-white hair, his periwinkle eyes and his pale skin were a wonderful combination that I just couldn't ignore. Physically, he was exactly the type of character I love… Even his hairstyle is great! And what to say about his pretty face! To me, he looked like an angel.

His style in clothes is something I also like about him. With all this mixed, the only word I can use to describe him is "perfect".

But, of course, there's more than just physical appearance. Shion's way of speaking, as we all know, is quite… Particular. And those beautiful words made me be more interested in this boy, even if they were a bit difficult to understand. This characteristic is something that, in my opinion, makes him special, not only in his group but among all the groups.

That poetic way of speaking is a beautiful combination with his voice. When he speaks I find it so mystical… And when he sings his solo songs I feel relaxed and even a bit emotional. He's not an angel just physically, he also sings like one!

But what made me love him completely was his personality. To be honest, at first I didn't understand why he acted so hostile to Cecil and signed with him, but when it was explained later I could see his point of view and I felt sorry for him, for how he was feeling and the big sacrifice he was making if we take into account his thoughts.

Loyalty is something I value a lot, and Shion has a huge loyalty towards his friends. After that incident, he changes his way of thinking and he starts getting more friendly to the rest, something I find beautiful.

I also find him very cute, an extra point for me to like him. His -sometimes- childish attitude is adorable! And how he acts around his friends… So lovely!

I also feel a bit similar to him in some aspects, such as listening to the same song again and again, liking birds or even usually feeling sleepy, besides other things. These similarities make me feel connected in some way with him.

Shion is a very special character for me, and I can't wait to see more content about him, to know more about this wonderful boy, for example, about his family, where he is from, how he ended up in HEAVENS, how he started to speak the way he does… There are a lot of things we don't know yet and I hope we can get more information about Shion soon!

[ladykailolu]

Howdy... I'm sorry I keep bothering you but you're the only bloke I feel like I can talk to about Jojo OCs TwT

I wonder how Mela would feel about meeting my OC Sadie Maddlin

She basically the Josuke of the Zeppelis

She's basically Juju's bastard daughter and she was raised with her mother Anastasia Maddlin alone.

When she was 10, her mother left home and never came back (she abandoned her)

After living in their old house alone for a year she ran away and is a wandering adventurer in her normal au, just trying to live and find a place she belongs.

(she's now 14)

As for her personality:

Imagine Cruella De Vil from the animated movie but with a bit of the reboot but with less animal cruelty and younger [she's perfectly wretched]

In her villain au, she goes on a mission to basically murder all the zeppelis out of spite because everyone on her mother's side is gone, so she wants to murder her other half.

She has a revolver she carries around as well as a stand called Ballroom Blitz, it can morph her into and clone anyone she looks in the eye. She can also replicate their stands.

How would an interaction with Mela and her go (in the normal au and/or the villain au)

Brosssskkkkkkiiiii, you can always talk to me about JoJo OCs!!!!!

Awww, she's a poor dear!!! But does irresponsible Juju know that he has a daughter??? Does he even say anything to the girl he knocked up (or vice versa)??? I'd like to imagine that if he did know that he had an illegitimate daughter, he'd brush that fact aside to focus on the race, and well, you know what happens at the end TT_TT

And in the normal AU, does Sadie even know who her father is? Either way, I wish her the best! But, hey, it'd be interesting if along the way, her paths crossed with a certain Joestar...

In the normal AU if Mela knew about Sadie's lack of a home and her relationship to the Zeppeli family, she wouldn't stand for a relative to be cast out (and she would curse Juju up and down a storm in her head), but Mela was also raised to be discreet--a "proper lady," so to speak. She doesn't speak up, is not assertive when watched, and she most certainly doesn't cause waves in the family. Think "traditional feminine roles" for Mela, such as wife, home-maker, prospective mother (aka. baby-making factory), etc, etc. But she's not oblivious. She knows that kinds of connections her fiance has and knows that the Zeppeli family holds some wealth in America (but it's nowhere near the likes they had back in Naples before the beginning of the 20th century). So, she would pull a few strings on her fiance's connections to scoop Sadie off of the streets into a new direction that will take her to a proper home.

Of course, in the villain AU, Mela would be a target because she bears the name "Zeppeli" and that's who Sadie is going after. But I also think that Mela would try to appeal to Sadie's heart and speculate that the girl is hurting from being abandoned. Assuming that Sadie spills the beans on her backstory--in that her mother just up and left and her father Juju wasn't even around and maybe didn't know that she existed--so Mela plays on those emotions calmly and with a reassuring tone, eerily similar to an FBI agent trying to negotiate with a hostage-taking criminal. Idk if Sadie would buy it, but Mela makes these promises saying that the mistakes of her parents do not reflect on the family. She can help Sadie find a new and better home.

Does this make sense? And maybe if Juju didn't die and Sadie went around looking for her father after her mother left, Mela would hold Sadie's hand as she goes right over to Juju's house and knocks on his door with the child at her side. And when he answers, there's hell to pay.

[mha-adore]

hey! ty sm for doing the matchup exchange with me, i look forward to writing your match! i’m rita and i go by she/her pronouns. i have a preference for men & i’m 16. my quirk would be similar to shinso & inumaki from jjk,, i can control ppl and animals just by saying a command,,, an indicator for when i’m using my quirk would be my eyes changing color & a side effect to using my quirk would be getting light headed.

i’m a libra sun, aquarius moon, & leo rising. a slytherin & intj-t. i’m v polite and reserved when you first meet me. i’m pretty introverted and i have anxiety. it takes me while to open up since it takes me a while to trust ppl. i do tend to get annoyed and angry by others easily,, i’m a bit of a hot head. i’m pretty chill and like joking around once i open up,, i can also be kinda dumb. i’m a bit of a loner and i don’t have many friends. i’m actually a bit of an emotional person but only when it comes to shows, movies, books, etc,, i tend to keep my emotions bottled up. i’m self conscious and self critical. i care a lot about having perfect grades and getting into a good university but i’m so lazy (lots of breaks & procrastination) at the same time,, i end up getting everything done on time though. i’m impatient when it comes to my own things so i like doing things my way bc i feel more comfortable that way. i also like keeping things neat. i’ve also been told i have a resting sad face & that i’m intimidating. i wear a lot of black and i’d describe my style as dark academia mixed with 70s-90s fashion. when i’m at home i just wear comfortable clothing like pajama pants and a t-shirt.

my likes/hobbies/interests are baking, playing the sims, writing, and playing board games with ppl i’m close to. i also like relaxing in bed and spending time with people i’m close to and having fun. i’m interested in psychology, true crime, & history. i don’t like arrogant & closed minded people. i look for a partner who is loyal, kind, & open-minded. my love languages are gifts and quality time (both ways).

i hope this isn’t too much,, ty again! <3

Hey friend, it's my pleasure! Thanks sm for offering 💖

Can I just say super quick that your quirk is really cool? You could command an army of bears, raccoons or fire ants. I would be terrified. Also I'm an Aquarius moon and INTJ too, air moons gotta stay together. I totally got a Libra vibe off you when you first messaged me and you're super sweet 🎀 also I totally get you on the anxiety part, I have anxiety too. I know how terrifying it can be to reach out to new people so please know I'm proud of you for taking the chance to reach out to me 😊 and it's never too much; the more detail the better!

I match you with Shoto!

Say hi to the walking AC and heater unit. A couple reasons I picked him is because you mentioned having anxiety and being hot headed. With his father being, well, himself and his mother being the anxious person she is, Shoto understands both sides of the coin very well and knows how to deal with both parts. He can balance being calm and stern at the same time and he has the patience of a saint. He would give you the time and space you need to grow comfortable around new people and surroundings, as well he would be able to keep you grounded when your temper gets the best of you. He mellows you out. My personal headcanon is that he's a Capricorn sun, Scorpio moon, Virgo rising, Ravenclaw and INFP.

He returns your jokes with dry humor. He can keep a dead serious face while making the stupidest jokes too. He could look you dead in the eye, face straight, and rip a monster fart and not giggle just to see your reaction. Honestly the image of him holding eye contact while aggressively farting is funny in my head. I know I have the humor of a 9 year old.

He isn't bothered by you not having many friends. He's a private person and doesn't want a lot of people up in his business. He prefers few close friends over many distant friends. He knows you aren't stupid and pays no attention to anything you say that may sound dumb. He's heard so much dumb shit he learned to filter it from his brain.

He understands that you're closed off on your emotions. He really can't blame you, he's quite the same. If you get a little teary eyed over a book or movie he'll let you talk it out and cry if you'd like, but he won't push you to be uncomfortably open to him. He values your happiness over his own and doesn't mind you keeping your feelings to yourself. He respects your privacy. Regardless of what you may feel conscious or critical of about yourself he's there to remind you that you're perfect. You're healthy, you're strong and you're doing the best you can. No one could ask any more from you. He's lived a majority of his life feeling outcasted and ignored because of his scar and wouldn't wish the same on anyone, so if there's any part of you that you feel bad about he's always reminding you that you have no imperfections, everything about you makes you one of a kind. You're irreplicable.

He isn't worried about you procrastinating on studying or homework. As long as you get it done and do well enough he isn't concerned. If you ever have difficulty with a subject he's happy to help you study and learn. If you want he can ask Momo to join for a study party if you want the extra help or company. He just wants to see you succeed and get into the college of your cotton candy dreams. Oh and don't worry about your tuition, he has it covered. Don't even mention it to him it'll already be paid off, including books and living arrangements. He only wants you to pay him back by doing your best in school and showing him you can handle the hard work.

He always has a suggestion on ways you can do things but he knows you prefer to do them by yourself, so he'll neber bombard you with his ideas. If you ask for his input he has plenty to give but otherwise he gives you the room to make your own moves. He's a neat freak himself and is always happy to help you keep your room clean and well put together. He has good room decor ideas too if you want to spruce up your room.

He really doesn't see you as intimidating. He sees a confident, independent and strong young woman who can hold her own. He occasionally wonders if you're really sad or if that's just your expression and he'll occasionally ask. He's only making sure you're okay. If you're sad he's on it with a cute or funny movie, some snacks, a shoulder to cry on and a whole night's worth of stuff to talk about.

He likes your sense of fashion, he enjoys darker and warmer colors. He lives for the 80s aesthetic and loves to see you mix the two so effortlessly. He can, wants to and will give you his t shirts to wear at home. He'll also loan you hoodies and sweaters. He won't outright buy you a hoodie, he'll buy one for himself and let you get away with stealing it from him.

He's so soft for home made cookies and would love for you to make him some. Home made dinners are also great. He would love to help you bake and would enjoy baking dates. He'll also watch shows like Hell's Kitchen with you. He isn't exactly a huge gamer but he likes simulation games and RPGs like Sims, Animal Crossing, Pokemon, Harvest Moon etc. He'll binge these games with you all day and night. Your Sims have to get married to each other it's the law. He enjoys reading what you write - what you don't mind sharing of course. He won't go peeking in your personal writing, he knows it isn't his place. Concerning what you do share he'll read it with great interest and share his thoughts and any ideas he has. He would really enjoy writing something with you, like a short story or a comic. He loves how you convey your writing and would be honored to take part in it. His favorite board game is Candy Land, a close second being Monopoly, followed by Scrabble. He pulls out a big ass dictionary during Scrabble just to prove to people that he knows his vocabulary. He loves you dearly but all bets are off during Monopoly, it's a dog eat dog world and he isn't bailing you out of jail. He will, however, offer you real money in turn for properties in the game. No that isn't cheating the rules say nothing about it. He has no problem with a lazy day in bed though and wouldn't mind just dozing or watching shows together. Any time spent with you is time spent well. You two could watch paint dry together and he would have a blast. He'll buy the paint.

With his personal involvment in hero work he has lots of info on true crime cases and can share stories and books with you. He has everything from small robberies to Ted Bundy and beyond. If you have a question about a true crime case he has an answer. As for psychology I imagine he would study it himself, perhaps as a secondary career or freelance hobby. He'll examine characters from books and movies with you and run his own behavioral analysis unit from his bedroom. The FBI doesn't hold a candle to him. He can, will and already has tracked down your enemies and he has their addresses. With his father being the new number one hero he essentially has the force of the law in his hands and if need be, he will use it. He won't do anything unjust unless your safety is in jeopardy but he won't hesitate to bring someone down. As for history he has plenty of books ranging from founding of countries to wars, to major technological advancements to the invention of toilet paper. He knows some very niche history facts. If you need to impress a teacher with knowledge on history he has you covered. He'll make the teacher quit their job in shame.

Shoto is absolutely loyal to the end, open minded and kind to a fault. He understands how it's like to be ignored, misunderstood and bullied and he won't treat anyone else that way. Regardless of his opinion on someone he still gives them respect and kindness. He doesn't care how rude or petty someone acts, they're still a human and deserve to be treated as such.

He goes out of his way to buy you special gifts, he values personal meaning over monetary value. Between a basic cheap necklace and an expensive bracelet of your favorite gemstone and color, you bet he's going for the bracelet. The cost isn't important to him, he just wants to see your face light up when you open the gift. As for gifts from you he doesn't care about how much you spent, he just wants something from the heart. You could give him an origami swan that cost you nothing to make and he would treasure it like a rare antique. As for quality time, he always enjoys a good movie, board game, cuddle session or just a nap. Like I mentioned before, any time spent together is time spent well.

I hope you enjoyed this friend!! 🥀 I'll be sending my part your way soon, thanks again for the offer! I had a lot of fun with this one 😘

[bananiell]

rapper hc part 1

hi guys!!! so i’ve had this idea in my head forever and just didn’t have anyone to share it with but i told hedy about it yesterday and she scammed me into creating tumblr acc and sharing it here lol but when i went to write it down i  realized that i have a lot more to share so it’s gonna be just the 1st part for now, which was the only thing i had in my mind originally but now i’m working on expanding it.

i have a lot of ideas from the songs and this is no exception. this time the inspiration was NF - an amazing rapper and song writer. his songs uncover so much trauma and the things he raps and sings about are so real for a lot of us that you can’t help relating to them. NF’s real name is Nathan which also played part in this idea. lyrics of the songs are what the hc is based on so please listen to the songs i mention and pay attention to the lyrics.

ok i don’t wanna waste more of your time bc the hc is big as it is so without further ado let’s dive into it. p.s. it’s the first time i do a thing like that so im sorry in advance for any inconsistencies or the general drama:)))

TW!! (everything is just mentioned, nothing too graphic) physical abuse, verbal/emotional abuse, alcohol, drinking, drug addiction, overdose, death from overdose, kidnapping, torture (beating, skin burning, cuts – all of it not descriptive), violence, breaking one’s own bones, putting bastards to prison. also NF’s lyrics got a lot of triggers and cover very serious issues so if you decide to listen to some more of his music be careful with that. some of the things mentioned in the songs i’ve used here: depression, grave digging, guns, blood (in a non-violent way).

neil’s story: he grew up in an abusive family. his father was drinking a lot and abused him physically and verbally saying that he was nothing and nobody and would not amount to anything in his life. he despised neil’s love for music and laughed at him. he also hit him more when he noticed anything related to neil’s passion (neil humming some melody or listening to music in his headphones or trying to create smth). his mother tried to protect him but she couldn’t do much bc of her drug addiction. she overdosed during his last year in hs and surprisingly left him some money. when Nathan found out about that he was enraged and beat the shit out of neil so he would give him that money. to run away from his father neil goes to university to study his passion – music. he’s always had some kind of knack for creating music and rapping and now he could explore it more and not be afraid of nathan. he tries to overcome his trauma and even makes some friends (the foxes).

during the freshman year andrew and neil spend a lot of time together. they find the reflections of their hurt in each other and they find understanding. they share some of their past and their traumas; their view of the world and their dreams. andrew feels like he is falling because he’s never met anyone like neil. slowly there are soft touches and furtive glances but neither is ready yet to cross that line.

neil seemingly gets better even though there are a lot of hard moments on the way. however at the end of his freshman year nathan finds him and he and his cronies kidnap and beat neil up for Mary’s money keeping him in the basement for several days. this money is all neil’s got to survive and build his life so he doesn’t say anything and thinks of the ways to run. im not good with making up torture techniques and nathan is not so imaginative here but they still leave neil with scars on his face, his torso and hands (mostly burns from cigarettes, iron, cuts from glass bottles). by the end of the third day neil is physically and morally exhausted so he gives up and transfers all the money to them (he’s got a little of it left on his other acc) and they drunk on their win leave him in the basement. he breaks his fingers to get out of the handcuffs and gets out through the small basement window and runs outside. not long after that he collapses from all the exhaustion and blood loss and someone notices him. they call the cops and the ambulance. after that nathan and his cronies are put into prison and neil is left with almost no money. he leaves the state and a year later with a lot of effort, practicing and self-advertising he successfully signs with a music label under the name N/A.

andrew’s story: tilda didn’t give him up but was a shitty mother (obv) with drug addiction. andrew and aaron’s parents were divorced and their father didn’t live with them but tried to be there when he could. andrew started creating music as an outlet bc tilda’s boyfriends were physically abusing him and he tried to protect aaron from that. he and aaron were close bc they only had each other but andrew still didn’t share his trauma with aaron trying to protect him from that hell. of course he was only a child and couldn’t always take aaron’s place in beating but most of it lay on him. while at hs they became a band with the help of nicky and performed with their songs were they could and tried to self-advertise and wymack (he’s the head of the music dep at uni and also one of the profs) noticed them and offered them partial scholarships. they had some money left after tilda’s overdose (they lived for some time with their father after her death) so they went to get actual education on music production (at this point I don’t care how plausible it sounds, just don’t think too much about it ok lol)

the story:

ok so nathaniel once went to uni with the foxes (is there such a major as music production and singing or smth?) but at the end of his freshman year he disappeared. he was not very sociable so no one really cared where’d he go except for the foxes with whom he became somewhat friends. 1-2 years later he pops up as a new young and very talented rapper named N/A and he’s got burn scars all over his face and hands which he doesn’t hide so very intriguing right??? nobody knows much about him and that his name stands for Neil Abram so they take it literally as ‘no data available’ or smth (hedy also proposed “not applicable”!). foxes are like WTF we know that guy!! and wymack is also like isn’t that nathaniel??

Andrew’s become a huge fan of neil’s music. only renee knows that andrew’s been listening to neil’s songs non stop bc he can relate so hard to them and they just hit him right where it hurts. at the end of their last year they have like a huge final concert or smth and wymack organizes it to be held in one of the palmetto clubs. at the same time neil is coming back to Palmetto bc he is nostalgic of the time he spent in the uni with the foxes and he wants to escape his real life for a moment. he wants to visit the city and reminisce and he believes that none of the foxes really remembers him bc he was a nobody. I know the plot is getting ridiculous but bear with me

so it’s the evening of the gig and the students perform their music (songs, instrumentals, as solos/duets/bands etc). andrew majorly produces rap songs at this point and he performs in duet with renee with their song (NF’s “Can you hold me”). everyone is like shit it was so good but then andrew performs his solo song (NF’s “How could you leave us”). aaron is standing there and is a fucking mess bc he never knew andrew was that affected by their past and their mother’s death bc he never showed it and didn’t ever want to talk about his issues. (be warned this is a heart-wrenching song and it fits fucking perfectly). after that andrew almost runs outside for a smoke, trying to light a cigarette with his shaking fingers and thats when he sees a strange all covered up figure in a black hoodie entering the club but also cautiously looking over their shoulder like they don’t want to be caught. andrew ever the protective one follows him but loses in the crowd of the low lit club. 10 mins later there is quiet and the figure goes on stage – obv its neil. “Intro III” starts playing.

andrew is in awe and he’s never heard this song before so it must be new. he also never saw neil perform live so he cant really move bc the performance is so powerful and magnetic. *neils sitting on one of the disconnected amplifiers in the dark and the music starts building up. At 2:00 of the song after the words “I mean, what are you, outta your mind? 'Cause both of us will be, come on, let's go outside!” he pulls off his hood, his movements are fierce and aggressive and he’s almost screaming in the mic. at words “You had me scared for a second, I thought we were diggin' my grave” theres his fathers smile, vicious, crazy and cruel – thats how he remembered it spending 3 days in that basement. (fyi in the song NF’s talking to his fear and they go back and forth).* 

andrew is mesmerized, the foxes are in shock, the whole crowd does not understand who that is but they watch with open mouths. the song ends and the crowd goes wild. that’s when neil starts talking.

“hello palmetto. this is a great concert you got and some of you guys are fucking talented. my name is neil and I used to go to PSU a long time ago so you prolly don’t know me but professor wymack out there let me come here on this stage and sing a couple of my songs for you. one of them is my old song, and another is new but they both tell my story and I hope you like’em”. 

people cheer and applaud and after a moment another song starts playing. its the one andrew knows (it’s Paralyzed). the atmosphere gets way calmer but everyone is just as hypnotized. during the chorus neil is standing under the dim lights, head turned up facing the ceiling, eyes closed, his scars are illuminated. he looks almost peaceful but there’s pain and apathy showing on his face and in his posture. the song ends and neil leaves the stage. andrew cant make his legs move but he has to meet neil (he just realized that neil’s shared his name with them and it wasn’t “nathaniel” and andrew’s got so many questions).

he forces himself to move and almost runs backstage. neil is already leaving but andrew stops him by grabbing him by his arm. they stand there looking at each other, andrew panting, his body shaking a little, neil wide-eyed.

“Andrew…” he whispers obviously surprised by seeing Andrew here.

“Nath- Neil.” suddenly Andrew cant ask a single question. he’s got so many that it feels like a waste of time to ask them one by one. Neil looks down at where Andrew is still grabbing his arm and Andrew lets go off him like its burnt him. “You are here” he lets out on the exhale like he still can’t believe it.

Neil averts his eyes and puts the hood of his sweater on his head so that the shadows obscure half of his face. “Yeah” he replies and after a few seconds follows with hesitant “How are you?” It is a stupid question, Andrew thinks but he answers nonetheless with simple fine. Neil holds his head low, and Andrew can’t help but wonder if Neil doesn’t wanna look him in the eyes after his disappearance so many years ago or if he simply doesn’t want to see Andrew’s face. Both options hurt him but he doesn’t have the heart to ask.

the end of part 1. come yell at me on twt or here hihi

[oppsie--channie]

[06:31pm] bang chan

Warnings: suggestive, smut towards the end, non-idol!Chan

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You were late to meet your guy best friend, Hyunjin. Who, despite being one year younger than you, frequented the same year on college as you since you entered one year later.

You left your shared appartment, not caring to bother your roommate that was in his room. He was probably doing some homework to be free for the rest of the weekend, since it was Friday.

Suddenly you hear your phone ring. You pick it up, not paying attention to the screen, because you're crossing the street.

"Are you there yet?" You can hear Hyunjin's voice through your phone.

"No, why?" You ask quickly, stoping in your track when you get to the sidewalk.

"I won't be able to make it today. Something came up with Seungmin, and you know how he gets when I don't help him." You laugh a little, remembering one time when you were watching a movie with Hyunjin in his house and Seungmin entered the appartment yelling for help, but turning out he just wanted to go shopping.

"It's okey. He's your best friend too, so I don't mind." You say rationally.

"You're the best. I owe you everything!" You laughed out loud, making Hyunjin giggle. "I'm sorry. I have to go. I love you!"

"I love you too, Hyunjinnie!" You put your phone in your bag and think for a little. You don't have anything else to do, so you might just go home, watch a movie and cuddle your giant stuffy bear that Hyunjin gave you.

Putting the key in the keyhole of your shared appartment door, you enter it quickly, kicking off your shoes at the entrance.

You walk around the flat and you don't see any sign of human activity so you just think that Chan had gone out. Making your way to your bedroom, you start removing your jacket and handbag, closing your door behind you.

When you finish undressing your normal clothes and dressing your sleepwear, you sit at your secretary and open your laptop, searching for something to watch.

When you finally decide which movie you're gonna see, you hear a whimper from outside your room, but you decide to let it go since it could be from your neighbor or something like that. A couple of minutes into the movie, you hear another whimper but it sounds more like a moan to you, so you decide to exit your room to check it out.

In the living room, everything is turned off so it couldn't be any noise from the television or so. In the kitchen it couldn't even be because you don't have anything that could transmit noises in voice form. So you stop for a little while and try to listen for more.

Suddenly you hear a muffled voice, it's near you but not that near, so you walk towards it's origin, and surprisingly it comes from Chan's room.

"Like what you see?" You hear in almost a whisper with a husky tone and you would be lying if you said that that tone didn't make something in you tingle. "I'm bigger than you expected?" He laughs a little and you put your ear in the door to try to hear what is happening inside, "Of course, I am babygirl! I bet you wanted me to be by your side, massaging your thighs and hips."

You know you shouldn't be listening to whatever he is doing, you supposed that he was out of the appartment. But you find his voice and his way of talking so addictive. Not mentioning the gigantic crush you had on him, so every little bit of "fun" you could get with him was fantastic.

You two didn't talk much. Just the normal between roommates: what is necessary for the house, if someone was coming over, etc. You would also talk if you had exams and would bond over tea or coffee, whatever you'd find better for the occasion, but nothing too intimate. You guess there wasn't any particular moment to set that level of intimacy. But you did have the MOST GIGANTIC CRUSH on him.

Pushing you off of your thoughts was another moan coming from his room and you got even closer to the door if that was possible. And hear another moan, but louder this time, along with a soft giggle.

"Did you cum yet?" He ask to someone, who you couldn't figure who it was, "Good. We both did it then." You furrow your eyebrows in confusion and surprise, you can't believe that you just heard him cum. "I have to go clean myself. I'll turn off the cam now, see you another time babygirl!" You hear a soft closing sound, but continue in place thinking to yourself.

After a few seconds of thinking, you put your finger around what he was doing: was either virtual sex or he's a camboy. It's most likely to be the second one because he doesn't have a partner and he kinda has some money with him all the time, which he says that he got from his parents, but you've seen his bank recipe one time by accident, thinking it was yours, but it was always from different people. You're cut off from your train of thoughts, when the door is opened and you fall right onto the floor near Chan's feet.

"What?!" He ask with a surprised tone. You get up quickly and you can see his shocked face. You couldn't do anything except stare at his shocked face, which turned to a smirk afterwards. "Were you spying on me?" He steps closer to you but you step backwards, not remembering that there was a wall and you were now trapped betweent it and Chan.

"N-no!" You stutter and you curse yourself under your breath for it. "I heard a whimper and I was trying to make sure you were okey. But I'm sure as hell now that you're more than okey." You look down quickly looking at his hips; grey sweatpants on and a slight volume in it.

"Oh, yes I am." He says lowly, stepping even closer to you, connecting your bodies. "You know what I was doing?" He now whispers in your hear with a seductive tone and you have to put all you energy on your legs because they're about to give up.

"Yeah. You're a c-ca-camboy." You stutter again and again and again and you can't stop looking at his lips and to where your bodies are connected: your hips, feeling heat radiating from it.

"Well, my babygirl has it figured out." You gulp at the petname as he slowly drags one hand from your right thigh, over your hips giving it a squeeze, until it reaches your face. "Do you wanna get a taste?"

Never in a million years.

Yes, please.

No! You have to resist it.

Just a little taste won't hurt anybody.

You're shaking your head uncontrollably, because you would never think that he would do something like this but at the same time, you've been drooling over him since forever.

"Is this a yes?" He whispers close to your ear as your body squirms when his hand presses your hips against the wall with the help of his own hips. You can't talk so you just nod.

He now uses both of his hands to push your legs apart and to lift you up. You gladly wrap your legs around his waist as he walks you to his room, laying you on his bed.

"Is this okey?" He asks in the middle of kissing you passionately, as if he wanted this as much as you. You nod and he takes his hand to grab at your shorts and yanking them out of your body.

With your legs open, it's easier for him to be closer to you, but when his hand makes his way to in-between them your first instinct is to close them because of the sudden contact.

"I'm sorry. It's just me." He pulls away from the kiss immediately after you reacted to his touch. His gaze is so soft and pure when you lock eyes with him, and you feel safe so you nod again. Chan kisses you again, hungrier this time, and he slythers his hand to where it was before.

You whimper at the contact through your panties, now finding it almost familiar and he smiles in the middle of the kiss. He then uses one of his fingers to pull the fabric to the side and another one to slide up and down your heat. You moan into the kiss.

"Is this all from spying on me?" You close your eyes and nod as he inserts one finger in you. "I barely touched you and you're already this wet. This is gonna be a fun night." Chan chuckles darkly and inserts another finger.

So when he starts marking your neck and you start to moan out his name; you know you're in for a long adventure.

༺═────────────═༻

A/n: Heyyyy~~~ this is my first time doing something a little smut, I hope y'all like it because I'm kinda proud of it :')

[alexandriteobscuraarchive]

((Alright, given what I figured out on my own + what I’ve learned + my ideas here’s a rough outline for these muses and their verses; ))

Characters:

Ivry (17):

A sensitive young man with a talent for music and is quite popular as a result. Because of his frail constitution he doesn’t engage in ‘rough activities’ and doesn’t go out as often as his sister. He hates bugs and other disgusting things (he has a squeamish stomach) and loves his sister Iva very much. After the death of their parents he really worked hard to provide for his remaining family, his heart unable to bear the thought of them being separated. Ivry does his best to never show his sister an unkind or pained face and as a result blinds himself to how intuitive she actually is. He was meant to die from tuberculosis at the age of 17 but....

Iva (13):

Initially a bright, outgoing and tomboyish girl, Iva is the embodiment of the energy that Ivry’s illness robs from him. She likes collecting anything and everything from nature (this includes bugs, much to her brother’s displeasure and fright) and she’s very talented when it comes to drawing and singing, so much so that she often accompanies some of her brother’s performances. Her demeanor changes after the death of their parents and as Ivry’s health deteriorates. It’s this last that drives her to seek help from beyond mortal powers and the holy church: Iva makes a pact with a ‘Magician’, a pact that would, she’s told, grant her brother an eternity that he does not have. The price for such a pact, not to mention what she has to do begin said pact, is....

The ‘Magician’ (??):

A middle aged man who wanders from town to town enshrouded in dark magic and rumors. He carries with him various puppets and dolls and various people came that in his presence the unwell and dying can be ‘restored’ by mysterious means but for every ‘miracle’ performed someone else goes missing, falls ill, etc. There is always a price for such things and such a thing cannot be undone once promised. And on one fateful day this soft spoken man encounters a young girl and upon seeing her troubled face offers her a deal...

The Magician’s powers and knowledge stem from the cat (the devil) and while he initially began his work with the hopes of helping and saving others the reality of the situation and the prices that people must eventually pay have made him more neutral about the whole affair. His true heart is largely a mystery.

Verses

Verse 1 -

Set after the death of their parents and during their time at an orphanage up until Ivry manages to secure them a decent home through his outstanding music. This is Ivry and Iva at their most normal, struggling but normal, and encompasses the time of Ivry’s deterioration and Iva’s (potential) pact with the Magician. This is the only verse that will feature Ivry as a flesh and blood human whether he realizes it or not unless magic is involved, his sister and he trade places, etc.

Ivry: human Iva: human

Verse 2 -

Ivry has ‘awoken’ and lives with his sister completely locked within his own delusion and his sister’s inability to release him. In this verse Ivry is unaware of his true circumstances and believes himself to still be living (rather than a life sized puppet containing a soul) and that his sister Iva is dead. He doesn’t tell her this ‘truth’, of course, and acts as if nothing has changed between himself and his beloved sister as they live within their ‘happily ever after’. Iva will be the primary character here and will be wracked by guilt and shame over how she feels, what’s to come, etc, and may or may not break the fragile charade.

Ivry: puppet Iva: human

Verse 3 -

Ivry learns the truth and in doing so learns of his sister’s actions and unavoidable fate---the fact that she killed him in order to bind his soul and that as a result her own soul is doomed. Since both of them are corrupted by the devil’s magic their souls are unable to reincarnate and they are eternally separated from one another----or are they? This verse, while primarily rooted in canon, can diverge with the use of magic allowing some reincarnation, for their owed price to be altered (I’m fixated on Iva slowly becoming more and more of a doll day by day, much like the fate of her brother) and etc.

This verse, if we go with the canon events, also has the potential to cross into The Liars territory, although ‘Ivry’ as we know him will not be present save for perhaps some fragmentary memories. The puppet; having been bought from a shop centuries later, reawakens as ‘Grimm’.***

Ivry: puppet / ? Grimm: puppet / ?*** Iva: human / potential puppet / ?

*** 'Grimm’ is the most tentative point I have concerning all of this tbh, as it attaches to a completely different game and character (canon states Grimm and the ‘Magician’ are separate characters and ‘Grimm’ himself even appears in Iva and Ivry’s story. So until I can play the related material and learn more he’ll be low priority in the face of the Magician, Ivry and Iva.

Verse 4 -

Ivry lives his life as the humble and peculiar assistant/ward of a ‘dollmaker’ and so called ‘Magician’. His memories are dim, unreachable things and he’s never seen (or is at least not far from) a doll that shares his likeness to an unsettling degree. Almost as if it were crafted by the Magician to be his ‘sister’....

In this verse the contract has been made and the price has been paid but it’s slightly different: rather than their souls eroding to nothing in the depths of Hell Ivry still retains his ‘life’ and Iva is the one encased in a lifeless doll unable to wake. This was a conscious choice on her end and she viewed it as a necessary sacrifice in order for her beloved brother to continue living, even if he’s locked in a ‘dream’ that he cannot wake up from it’s worth if it what remains of his soul is intact.

Iva can be the bearer of this fate rather than Ivry should a person choose and the Magician will be a principle character along with either Ivry or Iva as his ‘ward’.

Ivry: puppet Iva: soulless puppet / ? The Magician: human

[junjosekaimangalover]

Tomoe X Reader X Akura-Oh ~ Brothers Can Have It Both Ways.....Can They? - * Not A Request * - Part 1

Kamisama Hajimemashita X Reader ~ * Requests Are Open *

Kamisama Kiss/Kamisama Hajimemashita X Reader

Tomoe X Reader X Akura-Oh ~ Brothers Can Have It Both Ways.....Can They? - * Not A Request * - Part 1 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I don't own the Anime series Kamisama Kiss/Kamisama Hajimemashita and I don't own any of the characters from the series. I only own my writing skills and my imagination. Please enjoy~~ ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 200 Years Ago: Normal POV: ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It was back in the feudal era in the Yokai world, where demons and humans lived besides each other. There were two Yokai demons however that were known for being absolutely merciless when it came to humans. The two Yokai's were Fox Demon Tomoe And His Brother Demon Akura-Oh.

Both of the demons thought that the human kind were weak and a waste of space but little did they know how important a mere human girl would be to them. They would also see just how much fire that this human girl would have and what innocence she would bear inside of her.

Just how much life shined in her eyes and how much love she held in her heart, this experience would also be the first time that the brothers would actually fight for a human and against each other for a human. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- One Sunny Day In The Regular Human/Yokai World: ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Tomoe and Akura-Oh were sitting on a couple branches of a nearby tree, just talking to one another when something passed by them. A human girl, a human girl who was picking flowers in the nearby meadow.

" La la la da la da.... " The human girl was humming/singing to herself while she picked roses, tulips, dandelions, sunflowers, lilacs, lilies and etc.

" Hm....what's an innocent girl like her doing all alone way out here in the field? " Tomoe asked himself.

" Don't know but it looks like she's not going to be alone for much longer. " Akura-Oh pointed out to some men that was heading out in the human girl's direction out in the field.

" Well, she better start running. " Tomoe replied back.

" Yeah she better, she won't get far though given how weak she is. " Akura-Oh said.

" Agreed. " Tomoe smirked. The men were heading forward to her direction and getting closer and closer with every minute.  ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Your POV: ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I was gathering flowers for my Mistress and Lord so they could celebrate they're wonderful day together. I was humming to myself when I heard footsteps coming from up behind me, I turned around to only see some shady looking men staring at me with grins on their faces.

" H-Hello....how can I help you men? " I squeaked out loud.

" Aww that's so cute, you will do just fine to serve our needs. " One of the three men grabbed my wrist and pulled me up closer to his face.

" She's also very pretty, that's a major bonus. We can't fool around with her if we can't stand to look at her. " One of the other three men grabbed my face to look at him as he examined my face.

" I wouldn't bruise a harmless pretty girl like her, otherwise she'll start to whine. " The third man said.

" Who said I was harmless? " I said as my light eyes darkened and then I took the knife from my kimono sleeve and swiftly striked all three men. The three men all fell to the ground while holding their arms/legs as they bled ferociously.

" Damn it! Woman, how dare you!? " One of the men said.

" How Dare I?! How dare you all try to do harm to a woman!? A woman that you thought was harmless! If I was harmless then you would have a much bigger punishment than the one I just gave all three of you. You would all burn in hell for sure for that! " I shouted as I place the knife back into my kimono sleeve and I lifted the basket that I had placed on the ground and placed it onto my hip.

" You all will need stitches for those wounds, I hope to never see you three again but if I do then there will surely be hell to pay. Especially if you find out who I serve. " My eyes darkened once again and then I walked away from them and headed out onto the path. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Tomoe's POV: ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- " Oh oh~!! We underestimated this human, she seems to be a fighter. I like my victims and toys to be fighters. I wonder if she will last as long as the others? " Akura-Oh said.

" Maybe we could take her right now? " I said to Akura-Oh.

" Getting impatient to play with our new toy now are we? " Akura-Oh smirked at me.

" I just can't wait to see our new toy fuss around on letting her go and demanding us to leave her alone. " I said while smirking back.

" Oh I see, well let's not waste any time now, someone might try to steal her if we waste time. "

" Agreed but let's wait until night because we don't want to cause a big commotion in the daylight and have humans try and hunt us down. " I said while crossing my arms.

" Fine. " Akura-Oh replied. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Nighttime: Your POV: ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I walked back into my home and was welcomed by the rest of the servants and my masters. I placed my basket of flowers onto the ground and got down on my knees to greet my masters back.

" I'm back home Master Lord and Master Mistress. " I said while still kneeling.

" Oh my ( Y/N___ )! Why did you get home so late? " My Master Lord asked me with a very concerned look on his face.

" Yes, why are you home so late and why do you have blood on your pretty kimono? " My Mistress asked me worriedly while taking my right sleeve and staring at it.

" Oh, I'm sorry Lord and Mistress. I was somewhat attacked by three men who crossed paths with me in the field. " I replied back.

" You were attacked!? By Whom!? " My Master Lord asked me immediately while I could see his eyes darken and the background was engulfed in flames from his dangerous and intense aura. I was sweating a little with not knowing what to say.

" Honey calm down, I'm sure ( Y/N____ ) used the training we gave her in order to protect herself. I'm also convinced that it ended well for her because if it didn't then she wouldn't be here right now. " My Mistress placed a hand on her husband's shoulder to try and calm him down and eventually he did.

" Yeah but still.....she doesn't deserve that! I want to know who these jerks were and if they got away! " My Master yelled out.

" I don't know who they were Master but I can tell you for sure is that I definitely didn't let them get away with what they were doing to me. " I said with a smile.

" What did you do dear? " My Mistress asked me.

" I cut them on the legs and arms and just kinda left them there and came back here. " I said bluntly.

" Aha! That's my girl! " My Master Lord hugged me tightly. My Mistress and My Lord always thought of me as the daughter they never had so they were very soft heart when it came to me. I smiled and hugged him back. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Later that night: ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I was sleeping in my bed quite soundly only then to be woken up by a sound of a sliding door.

" Huh? " I said as I woke up suddenly by the sudden noise I heard. I looked around to see if anyone was around me in my room but it was so dark that I couldn't see a thing so I turned the lamp next to me on.

' Gasp '

When I lit up the darkened room I saw two figures, both were Yokai. A fox demon and a regular flashy demon. I just continued to stare at the both of them while thinking of them.

' Wow, they are both really handsome....Wait! What am I even saying!? '

" Wh-Who are you two and why are you two even in my room? " I asked.

" Oh wow, I'm surprised she's never heard of us Akura-Oh. " The fox demon said.

" Well a human servant doesn't exactly have a lot time to spare to hear the latest news and gossip so maybe she spend most of her time training instead of lazing around. " The demon named Akura-Oh replied.

" What are you doing in my room? " I asked once again.

" Well to kidnap you of course. " Akura-Oh said while smiling and leaning towards me. My eyes widened a bit and I looked over to the fox demon and he only nodded.

" Kidnap me? For what purpose? " I started to get a little angry.

" Because your our new toy of course~! " Akura-Oh claimed out loud.

" I am not anyone's toy! " I shouted.

" That's what you think. " The fox demon replied while smiling at my sudden boldness.

Before I could even react to his reply, I was suddenly lifted off from my bed and onto the shoulders of the fox demon.

" Ah! " I yelped out, I took the knife and tried to swing it towards the back of the fox demon but Akura-Oh knocked it out of my hands quickly.

" My Lady! " I heard one of the other servants barge into my room and take notice of my current situation.

" Help me please! " I shouted.

" I'm coming! " The servant man took out his sword and tried to defeat The Yokai but to no avail. Akura-Oh disposed of

him quickly and before my eyes was his dead body on the ground floor of my room.

" Oh no..... " I felt tears start to form on the edges of my eyes.

" Don't cry for such a puny man who wasn't able to protect you and is not worthy of being your servant or being around your presence for that matter. " The fox demon said slyly.

I snapped there and then.

" YOU ALL JUST SHUT-UP!!! YOU DON'T KNOW A SINGLE THING ABOUT US HUMANS AND WHAT WE STAND FOR!! " I shouted so loud that I could've lost my voice at that moment.

" Ouch!! Damn woman you sure are loud.... " The fox demon and Akura-Oh were rubbing their ears together from recieving my loud comments.

" Don't you dare say that he wasn't worthy of me, he was the most loyal and noble servant that I have ever known and now thanks to you stupid Yokai, he's gone forever and I'll never see him again! " I started weeping like crazy and sniffling. I wiped my tears away with my kimono sleeve.

" .....Did he really mean that much to you? " The fox demon asked me.

" Yes he did, he was a beloved friend of mine. " I managed to reply to him despite of all my sniffling.

' Sigh '

" Undo it Akura-Oh. " The fox demon said.

" Why should I? " Akura-Oh replied.

" Because if you don't then this human toy will complain to us about this countless times in the future and that will be very annoying for the both of us. " He said.

" Good point. Very well. Human. " Akura-Oh said while pointing at me.

" How about we make a deal, I'll bring your friend back to life under the condition that you will come with us to be our new pet willingly. Will you accept the deal? Plus, I don't mind if you kick and scream while we're on the way there but try to be a little quiet about it. " Akura-Oh asked me and I seemed to calm myself down in order to think about this situation but there really was nothing to think about.

I would accept anything if it meant bringing him back.

" Be sure to keep in mind that we get our way despite how yo- "

" Yes. " I said.

" Huh? " The fox demon said suddenly with a questionable look on his face and Akura-Oh's face joined him with that matter.

" I said yes, I'll go quietly with you two if you bring him back right now. I even promise not to escape just as long as my friend is back to the way he was. Alive and well. " I said while crossing my arms together.

" Well well, I did not expect you to give up your happiness and freedom just like that but as long as we get what we want I don't object. Here you go. " Akura-Oh smiled and then snapped his fingers together. Then right before my eyes I saw my friend revert back to his healthy state but just unconscious.

" Thank you Akura-Oh and you too. " I said while breathing a sigh of relief.

" Sure whatever, now let's go. " Akura-Oh said.

" Wait! " I said.

" What now human? " The fox demon asked obviously having a very irritated look on his face.

" First, my name is not human it is ( Y/N___ ) and second, can I walk with you guys instead of being carried there? " I said while having a look of annoyance plastered all over my face as well.

" I could care less what your name is but fine, I'll put you down. " The fox demon put me down and then I straightened my kimono out.

" What's your name anyway Yokai? " I said while smiling because I turned the tables around on him and I could tell that he did not appreciate me calling him Yokai.

" Hahaha....she's funny, she will be very useful. " Akura-Oh commented on us.

" Shutup Akura-Oh! My name is Tomoe so don't call me Yokai! " He said.

" I won't as long as you don't call me human or woman. Now let's go and get this stupid hell that's called my future life over with. " I said while walking out of the messy situation.

" Wow, I can already tell she will be a major handful. Are you sure you don't wanna just kill her? " Tomoe asked Akura-Oh.

" Nope, she's too much fun now. " Akura-Oh said while smiling widely and his sharp teeth were showing.

" I heard that by the way now let's go! " I shouted.

" Alright! You better watch yourself ( Y/N___ ) because if you don't then I will surely kill you. " Tomoe said to me.

" I don't think you will. " I said.

" Why's that? " He asked.

" Because I could tell that even though you mercilessly kill Humans and Yokai alike, you just need someone to show you both something special and then when that happens you two will see everything differently. " I said while smiling.

" What does that mean and what is that special something? " They both asked me.

" I can't tell you that just yet but in time I will show you. " I smiled to myself.

" Humans love to spit out nonsense don't they? " Tomoe said.

" They sure do. " Akura-Oh replied.

" Yep, we sure do. " I replied back to them and then laughed softly. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Originally this was going to be a one part oneshot but I have so much I want to add in but I can only add in so much into one chapter.

I hope you look forward to this because part 2 may be coming tomorrow.

[toast-connoisseur]

All of the [I believe in] and [my thoughts on] questions! [Favorites] too if you're feeling frisky.

[ I Believe In ]

169: Love at first sight: I believe in knowing someone will be special to you at first sight, but not love right off the bat.

168: Luck: To an extent.

167: Fate: Same as above.

166: Yourself: Enough for now, but I could always do better.

165: Aliens: Yes.

164: Heaven: While I love the thought of it, I don’t know for sure if I’d believe in such a place.

163: Hell: Same as above. Although this option scares me.

162: God: I’m an agnostic.

161: Horoscopes: To an extent. I love learning about them.

160: Soul mates: Yes, but I believe they come in all forms. Friend soul mates, romantic soul mates, etc...

159: Ghosts: Hell yes

158: Gay Marriage: I believe in marriage between two consenting and loving adults, yes.

157: War: While there are some that were needed (unfortunately) I don’t believe any of the ones going on now need to exist.

156: Orbs: Yes, I’ve seen them.

155: Magic: Yes, I’ve felt it.

[ Here’s What I Think About ]

122: War: See #157

121: George Bush: Murderer

120: Gay Marriage: See #158

119: The presidential election: Garbage candidates

118: Abortion: To each the right to their own bodies.

117: MySpace: I miss this hoe.

116: Reality TV: Interesting for a few minutes but then it always goes too far.

115: Parents: Love them, but boy are they a whole other responsibility I didn’t ask for.

114: Back stabbers: Trash. Get rid of them if they’re in your life still.

113: Ebay: I rarely shop on here but know they have good stuff sometimes.

112: Facebook: I really mostly keep it for my family, don’t really care for it.

111: Work: Need it to pay bills, hate it. Wish I had something more interesting to me.

110: My Neighbors: Loud.

109: Gas Prices: Should forever stay low.

108: Designer Clothes: I’m not one to really care about brands and labels but they have cute stuff sometimes.

107: College: My brain hurts.

106: Sports: Fun to watch even though I don’t know much about them.

105: My family: Love them even when they drive me nuts.

104: The future: Looking forward to some good shit happening. Fingers crossed it’s sooner rather than later.

[ My Favorites ]

37: Candy: Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups or Tamarindo (Lucas)

36: Vehicle: 1958 Chevy Impala

35: President: Pass.

34: State visited: I love living in CA but Oregon was very nice to me.

33: Cellphone provider: Y’all remember Cingular??

32: Athlete: Serena Williams

31: Actor: Dwayne Johnson

30: Actress: Nicole Kidman

29: Singer: Beyoncé

28: Band: Cobra Starship

27: Clothing store: Ross is pretty much the only store that carries clothes that fit me

26: Grocery store: Food 4 Less has everything

25: TV show: Bewitched

24: Movie: Saved!

23: Website: Neopets .com

22: Animal: Polar bears

21: Theme park: Disneyland

20: Holiday: Halloween

19: Sport to watch: Baseball

18: Sport to play: Softball

17: Magazine: Cosmo is so ridiculous, it’s hilarious most time

16: Book: Rosemary’s Baby

15: Day of the week: Saturday

14: Beach: There are so many better ones but I like the memories I’ve had at Hermosa Beach

13: Concert attended: Warped Tour. All the years I went.

12: Thing to cook: Anything with chicken tbh

11: Food: Pasta

10: Restaurant: It honestly depends on my mood. I’m lucky to live in an area where we have so many amazing restaurants with good food from around the globe. I am trying to buy more from mom and pop shops though!

9: Radio station: I don’t really listen to the radio anymore thanks to Apple Music lol

8: Yankee candle scent: I like anything that smells clean

7: Perfume: I forget the name but it’s the one with Zendaya as the model for it. I smelled it in a magazine and it was divine.

6: Flower: Daisies!

5: Color: Blood red (not maroon).

4: Talk show host: I don’t really watch these.

3: Comedian: This one is hard but I love Gabriel Iglesias.

2: Dog breed: I’ve only had cocker spaniels in my life and they’ve been the best ever.

1: Did you answer all these truthfully?: Absolutely!!

Thanks for the ask!💕

[carpe-lumxn]

@collidingxworlds | continued from here (x)

Okay, so at first Lucifer delivered some boundaries of what can and can't be done in order to try and seek a compromise. According to Crowley's sullen reply it was not as effective. Then again, Crowley was not keen at all to give up his view of Earth, willing to fight tooth and nail for it again. Why someone would fight so hard for an unfinished prototype, Lucifer did not understand. Alright already. You are right, changing one's worldview was a process that required multiple steps. Perhaps Lucifer was asking for suggestions in order for Crowley to have no reason to object to Hell anymore, but his choice was clear-- he wanted the company of humanity and humanity only. No matter how flawed it was. So. Despite how problematic it was, it would be wiser to let the matter rest for now. Meanwhile, Lucifer explicitly stated that she was here for suggestions for improvement, which was somewhat true, so she might as well make the most of it.

Bear with me, princess, she thought as Crowley rolled his eyes. You could survive 6000 years as a demon, you could survive this brief conversation. She could be patient, luckily. So Lucifer huffed, sat back, crossed her arms, and listened.

Lucifer raised an eyebrow at Crowley's attempt to appease her pride. Arguing that she knew Earth better than other demons. Well. Only to a certain extent, Lucifer never visited the surface for long. Then she realised that Crowley was justifying this from her fashion choice. Ah. It was nighttime, so he wasn't able to see her full ensemble. Lucifer crossed her ankles, flashing her dragon-scaled spats and the tattered ash edges of her culottes. Very strange to wear spats in the 21st century, was it not? Yes, they, along with gold makeup, were incredibly fashionable with the Archangels. 'Tis a dead end, sweetie, nothing to see here. 

Maybe it was petty, yes, but Lucifer scoffed at they’ll listen to you, we’ve always have. It was a very delicate balance, power. She chewed the tip of the cigar. No can do. Lucifer did not trust so much given out. “I see you’ve never met Behemoth and Leviathan. Or Asmodeus and his cult. You are right, some demons do need to hear that, but saying all that at once? Hmm. There's also a crowd who would not care much for that, a crowd who would see that as degrading, and another crowd... well. Bit hard to explain about that crowd." She waved her hand. "Fugetaboutit."

So Lucifer was feeling confident at first. And then Crowley talked about the politics, how Lucifer sold fake sights just like the incompetent political leaders on this planet. Okay, that caused Lucifer's patience to wane, because that wasn’t true. There was an end in sight, they just had to push for it. Second of all, Crowley really was using a lot of keywords that ticked her off. Embarrassing, lazy, choice, change, etc. Alright, so maybe Crowley was smarter and more observant than Lucifer had thought. Lucifer did squint really hard at him during the "do nothing" accusation, however, as well as his proposal to remain independent. Yes, as if she didn't have other places to be.

“And if, despite your contribution, nothing improves…?”

Lucifer was surprised that Crowley knew not only how to accurately describe Epicurus' key ideas, but synthesise from it. How he had used it, on the other hand? Arguing that the best things were something to work towards? Okay. Lucifer would have laughed, or cried. Maybe both. Good thing Lucifer had become a little too fatigued by that belief to bother much. She didn't let herself be fazed because of this and so simply nodded along.

At the innuendo, Lucifer's eyes widened for a split second, but a blink later and she reverted back to a neutral face. Yikes, what a whiplash. She frowned a little at whether Crowley was reaffirming about the lack of Holy water or whether Crowley was joking about her lack of tolerance towards alcohol. Fine, that was a very solid double entendre. To add to the insult, the brandy was actually very delicious. Very smooth, with woody undertones and a nice, vanilla aftertaste. Okay, she was definitely wrong. Lucifer wasn’t feeling thirsty anymore, truly, so she put the brandy back onto the table.

“Technologies. Technologies in Hell. They’re… often ineffective against the environment. The root problem isn't the bacteria, it's the shifting tectonic plates. Every time they move, ground water leaks into the corridors and the rooms. And with water comes life. Course, solving that would require a complete do-over. Believe me. I've checked with the demons who developed them. We did experiment with Roman herringbone brickwork designed to withstand earthquakes once. Didn't work.” But a huff through the nostrils implied a curiosity about whether the aforementioned technologies could finally work. “On the bright side, at least we can't get sick from it.

“Beelzebub. Yes, you worked under Beelzebub. They’re infamous for being intensive with their work ethics. Why did you not weasel yourself out? Assign yourself under a better, more relaxed Lord, then Beelzebub won't have much dominion over you anymore. All you need to do is to forge the right documents. Put someone else in your place for karma, even, you're smart enough to do that. You only get into trouble if you’re caught, after all. And if that helps with your situation? I say that it's for all the better.”

A sense of panic had risen inside of her when Lucifer realised that she could not recognise Crowley. And even more when Crowley announced who he had been— an angel who made the stars. Well. That could explain why he wanted to be so detached. He was an outlier amongst the rebels. Combined with living on Earth rather than in Hell... what if that’s why Crowley was able to survive the Holy water. Because he still was, at the core, an angel. True, all demons want closure in regards to that fact, but again, what was a starmaker doing on the wrong side?

Why? Lucifer was about to ask. Why did you fall? But at the sight of Crowley’s panicked expression, Lucifer realised just how deep of a grave she had just dug. No no no, focus. He may miss being an angel like everyone else, but he was still fallen. They could start with some sort of retribution, then move onto giving context. Yes, they could do that.

“At least the past is over and done with now. I…” come on. What should she say? "Think it was unfair.” There you go. “I think it was unfair that that had happened to you, the fall, and you have all the rights to be furious.”

There was some truth— in the beginning, Lucifer did feel guilt at leading a failed revolution. And just as she thought that she had cleared it away, it had chosen to waltz back into her life at the worst moment. Well no, she's not going to let that piece of doubt get the better of her. There was work to be done.

"Very well. Perhaps I can never see Earth through your eyes just as much as you can’t see it through mine. But supporting it is still problematic. Look at it this way. For…” a demon. But then he did not see himself completely as a demon. “Someone like you, you are very sympathetic. More than what is safe. So perhaps a story can help you reconsider this.

"You’re working on a little project called humanity. Perhaps you're tasked to work on something small, like painting the chrysalises of caterpillars, or a bigger group effort like sculpting mountains out of stone." Lucifer's gaze drifted to the ground. If only they knew. "Despite your small contribution, you understand that all this is going to pay off into a very successful project. Then the Almighty announces that you all are only granted six days to finish building the Earth. You need more time. All of you need more time. And you understand that in order to successfully finish your craft, you can't perform under such a tight deadline.”

Lucifer fiddled with her lapels. "You know, I've looked at human books out of curiosity sometimes, to see how they view this world. Alfred Russel Wallace once theorised about evolution: that the current versions of Earth's living organisms are a finalised product of several prior drafts. Well they somewhat are… just under a tight deadline. And you think to yourself: those aren't even the best examples of what we are able to produce. Some were downright rushed. What amazing things would we be able to do if we were given more time?"

She unconsciously chewed her lower lip. Maybe this was a mistake. It had always been a mistake to be this open. But the serpent had made stars once, so he was an artist of sorts. If Lucifer was lucky, perhaps he'd understand the grief too familiar to Lucifer. If Lucifer was unlucky… well. Whatever he did, it will only be another firm reminder for Lucifer to do better next time.

"And then rather than being presented a compromise, even if it was just one more day, what are you given? A war. Not only a war, but one that divided you and your friends. And, and, not only divide, but cause them to turn against you. In extreme cases, your loved ones are the ones who fight you on that battlefield, because they know that you love them too much to hurt them. They know that they'll be rewarded and become celebrated for "fighting against their personal desires in order to do what is right"." She gave out a cold laugh. Lucifer had a scar in her chest. It was the one where Michael plunged her flaming sword inside from behind her back. No matter how many corporations Lucifer swapped out of, the scar remained, a reminder of her mistake of trusting Michael too much, too soon.

“And then you and your coworkers become punished together. But not just with something temporary like being jailed, no." Lucifer pressed the cigar butt into the ashtray and miracled her good cigarettes, finally. Maybe Crowley will complain about the stench of burning cloves and yarrow, but that was beyond her concern. "Well. You know the rest."

She shot a sharp glare at the serpent, at the starmaker. "Do you see my point?"

Lucifer let out a long, quiet sigh as she sat back, her gaze on the other end of the room. “I understand your distance. I don’t understand your complicity. Well. Somewhat. Even so, I don't understand why you would want to stand for a symbol of exploited labour and Her hubris. And I know that there is no benefit for my own kind to have to stay in a dark tunnel forever when there is something better at the other side. You... could argue that the really good things, the best ones, are the pleasures we have to work for," she quoted in an ironic attempt to lighten the mood.

Lucifer sighed again and shook her head in confusion. "I bet you didn't fall for something as grave as I did, starmaker. But my point still stands, that gives you all the more rights to seek retribution for what She had done to you. Don’t you wonder whether your life could be better than it is now? Don’t you want justice, too? Don't you want respect?”