#my boyfriend is a gamer and has gamer friends online and so i am alone and abandoned bc he never talks to me

[frnkmush]

sometimes i get sad when nobody likes my posts and then i remember that like ??? these are mostly fkn reblogs and random scrawled thoughts, stfu me

[kimsgoeun]

plots, muses, and fcs i wanna have/use. i prefer writing on tumblr and will most likely write using my multimuse blog. like or message me if you’re interested. 

plots

give me a “i’ve been in love with my best friend forever but they’ve never noticed, so i decided to start something up with best friend’s enemy/rival in the hopes of making them jealous.” 

muse a is a knight—it’s all they have ever wanted to be. muse b is a prince/princess, and muse a is assigned to personally protect them. this could go one of two ways—they could be fond of each other and eventually fall for one another, even though muse b is meant to marry into a noble family; OR they could both dislike each other but honor dictates that muse a must put up with muse a, and it’s more like an enemies-to-lovers sort of deal.

“A plot where a flower crown, summer dress wearing innocent princess of a girl goes to a festival and by chance meets the lead guitarist of one of the head-lining acts. He’s super punk and is known as the player/heartbreaker of his band and first of all just sees the girl as another groupie to add to his list–there’s lots of sneaking back stage and into tents when its dead late and eye fucking when he’s on stage. Then surprise, surprise, he falls hard for her her only to find out later that she has some sophisticated, rich boyfriend from some ivy league college and she’s not actually so innocent after all.”

give me a plot based off of ‘my love story with yamada-kun at lv999′; after muse a’s bf dumps them for someone they met online in a game, muse a decides to show up to a game event in the hopes of getting their ex to regret their decision. muse b is a well-known gamer online but doesn’t have much interest in the real world. the pair happen to meet in person after realizing they know of each other through one of the games muse b plays. muse a, spotting their ex and their new gf, convinces muse b to pretend to be in a relationship with them just to save face. 

witch hunter and witch having an illicit affair

demon x human gfs

"we met in the woods while riding early in the morning and had an intense fuck session but opps turns out you are actually my brother's betrothed since birth and your marriage will end up a centuries long dispute between our kingdoms"

i just want a i have a famous boyfriend but i cannot tell anyone plot cause cute like going out at night and dressing him up so that people won’t recognize him, secret meetings at the closet and FUCKING inside the bus

*whispers* a f/f thread where they’re two best friends, coworkers, whatever. who are both single and decide to spend valentine’s day together watching movies, eating snacks and drinking wine as gal pals but at some point of the night they’re singing to their favorite song because FUCK YEAH they sooo don’t need a man and slow dancing and there’s too much wine in their system and it’s all too unintentionally romantic that they start kissing and oh…..

ok but someone give me that cute bartender storyline though? like this guy tends bar at a restaurant or a pub or something and always sees this cute girl hanging out there, but she’s always either with friends or with some guy so he never really gets the time to talk to her BUT ONE DAY she walks into the place alone and orders so many drinks until she’s so bloody drunk, screaming about how her boyfriend cheated on her, that the bartender had to bring her home himself. she wakes up with a horrible hangover, stumbles out the room to find the bartender cooking breakfast and rolling his eyes, laughing. “first of all, you’re an idiot. second, we didn’t have sex if that’s what you’re wondering. third, breakfast will be ready soon. sit.” and fluff commences HELP PLZ

but what about “your ex hired me to make you fall in love with me then break your heart but oops i think i fell in love and now i’m conflicted what the fuck is happening i’m supposed to hurt you ow what am i sUPPOSED TO DO” that’d be rad

muses (totally open to other plots for them btw)

jang soo-min 

25 | athletic trainer | park yoo-na fc

very work-oriented; sarcastic; more of a tomboy; reactive; likes to host parties; social

plot ideas: ▶ muse  a  was  invited  to  spend  the  summer  at  their  best  friends  beach  house  with  their  entire  family  ,    including  the  older  brother  /  sister  (  muse  b )  that  they’ve  had  a  small    (  but  hopeless  )    crush  on  since  middle  school  .    despite  all  the  years  they’ve  known  each  other  ,    they’ve  never  spent  this  much  time  around  each  other  and  it’s  hard  to  keep  their  eyes  off  of  one  another  ,    especially  when  the  hot  summer  sun  is  involved  . ▶ i just need a “hey, i know you’re dating my brother but he’s an asshole and just playing with you but me, i’m in love with you since 3rd grade” plot? ▶ Oh your parents planned a surprise visit and now you’re having that awkward ‘Where is your life going? We’re low key disappointed in you.’ conversation in a ridiculously public place? Here let me pretend to be the reason you’ve been staring at your phone this whole time. “Hey baby, sorry I’m late.” ▶ athletic trainer x athlete

jasper o’hara 

26 | financial analyst | alex fitzalan fc

a little impulsive; was a major screw-up growing up (still is a little bit now); tends to avoid relationships; a smart-ass; has a strained relationship with his family; doesn’t really believe he’s capable of much

plot ideas: ▶ “academic rivals to lovers but she’s the only one who hates him and he’s been in love with her since the day they met” ▶ pls gimme a cliche ass plot with two best friends where muse a is an asshole who fucks everything with a pulse & doesn’t care about anyone but gets super protective etc about their best friend muse b at all times!! ▶ “i had to be ur fake boyfriend/girlfriend bc some creep was hitting on you and it was making you uncomfortable and now i have busted knuckles and a cut lip but hey are u okay” au

min moon-ji 

31 | art teacher | shin hye-sun fc

soft spoken; takes her a while to warm up to people; invisible middle child; doesn’t like asking for help

plot ideas: ▶ “Muse A is well-mannered, polite, quiet, and shy, and Muse B didn’t even know they existed until they tap on Muse B’s shoulder and asks them out super awkwardly/nervously. Muse B, feeling bad for them, agrees and ends up having a rather awkward and weird first date with them. Despite this, Muse A asks them out a second time, and while Muse B doesn’t exactly think it’s a good idea, finds themselves agreeing again. Of course the second time around, Muse A goes in for a kiss and it ends up not being chaste, sweet, or awkward like Muse B expects, but instead it’s rough and passionate and oops, now Muse B is a little more interested to see where things lead.” ▶ we’ve been best friends since we were kids, and people always see us as practically siblings, and we do everything together, but one night we had a ~ moment ~ and things have been weird ever since. now you’re making out with someone else right in front of me, and i don’t know why it makes me so upset, you’ve had bfs/gfs before and it wasn’t a problem. ▶ teacher x teacher ships

sebastian pierce-waldorf 

25 | brand marketing assistant | felix mallard fc

arrogant and a little condescending; tries to please his parents even if he hates the life they want for him; kind of a stick in the mud; high-strung; leads a semi-double life tp let off steam; occasionally does underground ring fights; too emotionally unavailable to be in relationships

plot ideas: ▶ enemies to lovers // enemies with benefits ▶ “We’re fake-dating and I’m supposed to publicly break up with you but you’ve been irritating me lately so instead of dumping you I publicly proposed to mess up your plan and now we’re getting married, fuck” au ▶ childhood friends where you’re about the only person i can stand being around and i’m really protective over you

wren gables 

 41 | hitman | ben barnes fc

lots of anger; got into the job to exact revenge; overthinker and a little narrow-minded; perfectionist in their work; loner

plot ideas: ▶ all i want right now is a cliché undercover marriage 1x1 where there’s two spies who hate each other and everyone knows it but now they’re the only two available for this long term undercover mission as a married couple in an apartment/suburb and they have to be believable through dinner parties and etc. just pleASE give this to me ▶ Give me a dark couple. Two ex-killers who have gone domestic and can’t seem to adjust properly, despite it being what they both agreed on. ▶ Give me an assassin and a girl he can’t kill and I’ll ship the hell out of it.

fcs

angelina jolie

anne hathaway

banita sandhu

ben barnes

bona 

brie larson

catherine haena kim

chae jong-hyeop

dichen lachman

henry golding

kang tae-oh

katherine mcnamara

kim taeri

lee joo myung

lee soo hyuk

levy tran

lewis tan

meghann fahy

nathalie emmanuel

penn badgely

rowoon

sam claflin

sandra oh

simone ashley

song jihyo

song kang

tati gabrielle

theo james

woo do hwan

yoo in na

[iwadori]

Haikyu boys when they make you insecure PT 1 (Kenma,Kuroo)

Part 1 Part 2  Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6.

Word Count:3k 

genre: angst, fluff

masterlist

Kenma:

You and Kenma have been in a long distance relationship for a while.

Both of you stream, Kenma doing it seriously for his job and you just playing it for fun,

Sometimes you stream together of course but because of your difference in audiences and games you don’t do it all the time

“Bye guys! Hope you enjoyed todays stream” You wave off to the camera and shut off your PC taking a few sips of water.

Kenma: Hey.. nice stream today Y/N are you going to watch mine?

Y/N: Of course I will 

Kenma: Ok talk to you later

Y/N: okayy <3

Kenma is what inspired you to stream, he also taught you all the ins and outs of streaming making sure you were set and ready. Your gaming style was very relaxed and friendly as you obviously weren’t streaming as a career just for fun and to make friends with your online viewers. The games you played were usually: minecraft, COD, Sims 4, Roblox, Animal crossing and *Insert your favourite game here* the way I literally named all the games I play 

You wait for Kenmas stream to start, kind of excited as you’ve always loved seeing your boyfriend in his ‘element’ when it comes to playing to games. As your boyfriends stream starts you see he’s already chosen what game he is playing today which is to your surprise Call of duty, since that was the game you were playing earlier.

As he gets into the stream you are entertained, as always since Kenma was being his usual self laughing at his own deadpan jokes and interacting with his viewers. He is currently waiting for his capture the flag game to start so as he waits he decides to read some comments in the chat.

You’re used to the usual ‘Kenma where is Y/N I miss your usual streams together’ or ‘kenma please RAIL me’ which always makes you laugh. You were also used to the common hate comments Kenma and You both got on your streams but you were definitely not ready for this..

@ Ihatewomanandiamadick : Hey Kenma did you see your girls stream today she is so dog shit at COD lmaoooo jhdfkjdrhdrr

“Well hello ihatewomenandiamadick” started Kenma “but yes I did see Y/N stream and obviously she is not the best at games and I would definitely NOT ask her to team with me for any serious gaming competitions ... but she’s fun to watch I guess” as he finished speaking about you his game loaded up so he focused his attention on that the words he just spoke going to the back of his mind as they end up at the forefront of yours.

You obviously knew you were no match for Kenma’s gaming expertise but you didn’t expect him to publicly agree with a hate comment let alone add more of his imput on you. Did he really think that about you? ‘She’s fun to watch I guess’ did he not even enjoy your streams that much?

You wanted to distract yourself, and you definitely couldn’t do that watching him so you close off of his stream and get in your bed deciding to watch your favourite show. 

Waking up at 6pm after your sad nap, you see that Kenma has left some messages to you,

Kenma: hey did you watch my stream?

Kenma: do you want to facetime later and play some minecraft..?

Kenma: y/n r u ok??

Y/N: oh hey cnt play minecraft w you rn not really in the mood..

Kenma: oh ok..

Time passed since then a month to be exact and you basically dropped off of the face of the earth, you weren’t in the mood to do anything let alone game and stream, which was a constant reminder of your boyfriend (something you didn’t want at the time.) 

You felt embarrassed over all the things he said about you and all the things you now think he thinks about you and the way you play. Maybe he thinks even worse things about you, beyond just how you game? What if he doesn’t even genuinely like you...or he has someone else...it does make sense, you do both live miles and miles away from eachother AND he’s a big streamer you see the amount of girls in his comments.

You shake your head to erase your protruding thoughts coming in your mind, but it doesn’t really help. You and Kenma haven’t spoken much over this month he tried to constantly reach out to you at first but you assume he got bored over your constant, repetitive dry texts. So you were almost content with you and Kenma not even being in a relationship anymore.

However on Kenma’s side, he was beyond worried about you. Since you haven’t been streaming or barely responded to his texts he thought something happened to you, but he didn’t want to be seen as ‘overstepping boundaries’ if there was nothing wrong at all with you and you simply were just ‘not in the mood.’ 

So here he is, in Kuroo’s apartment trying to get him to help him out on finding out what is wrong with you.

“So kenma can you remember what happened the day when Y/N went ‘ghost’“ asked Kuroo in a mock detective voice

“Y/N didn’t go ‘ghost’ Kuro, and take this seriously” said Kenma “I’m worried bout her”

“Okay fine, but for real what’s the last thing you remember before she started acting all weird.” 

“Umm I think it was around a month ago I did my saturday stream and I think she was on it but she didn’t leave her usual nice comments throughout”

“Ohh that was the stream when you sai-” Kuroo said before pausing his words as the memory of what Kenma said about you on his stream came in his mind, as even Kuroo thought it was a tad bit harsh for Kenma to say all those things “I think I know why Y/N has been so distant kiddo”

“What why?” Asked Kenma

Kuroo pulls out his phone and brings up the clip off what Kenma said and Kenma’s face cringes ‘did he really say all those things about you’ he thinks. 

“Shit.. I didn’t know I said all of that” he said quietly “how do I make it up to her?”

“There’s only one thing you can really do Kenma” said kuroo

You are woken up out of your sleep by a knock on the door. Getting out your bed like a zombie, you trudge to your front door only surprised by what you see. There in his 5′6 glory stood your ‘boyfriend’ Kenma with a controller and a kitten teddy in his hand. You were very tempted to shut the door in his face and get back to your dreamless sleep but you waited on him to speak.

“Hi Y/N” he said quietly “wanna play some minecraft...?”

“Why so you can ridicule me on how shit I am?” You ask bitterly ready to shut the door on him

“No! No not all” he said stopping you from shutting the door entering your place “Y/N i’m really sorry on what I said, I wasn’t thinking AT ALL... I love watching your streams and I think you’re great at playing games...I was just being a dick,”

You take a deep breath before tears pool in your eyes “what you said really hurt me kenma..” you say “ I know people say shitty things on the internet all the time... it’s the internet. But I wasn’t expecting you to agree with the hater and say even more shitty things on top of that.. I don’t think I want to even stream anymore”

Upon hearing that, Kenma’s mouth parts open with shock ‘you dont want to stream anymore’ were his comments that bad? Now he feel even worse as he should and is now more determined to make things right. 

He impulsively drags your arm into your game room, catching your surprise ‘what is he up too?’ you think. He stops for a second seeing your usual pristine gaming set up, collected up with dust. 

“What are you do-” you start 

“Just wait!” He says, as he rushes away turning on all your stuff and logging onto his twitch account as he sees the views go up he starts to speak

 “Hi guys, its me kodzuken and today I’m here on stream with my beautiful girlfriend and today I want to say..” he turns to you “Y/N im so sorry for the horrible things I said to you that day... I was just being a dick and I’m sorry I really am.”

You look at the chat and you see some confusion and some people recalling his words from last month. “It’s fine Kenma, I forgive you” you say giving him a hug”

“Okay Y/N, so what do you say... wanna beat my ass at bed wars?” He says with a smirk 

“When have I ever loss?” you return his smirk

Of course you did beat his ass as bed wars for rounds on rounds never losing proving yourself to actually be a good gamer girl. You enjoyed your time with Kenma, forgetting what he said before about you and moving on. 

Eventually, you guys moved in together and streamed together all the time and yes you still do play for fun but you’ve gotten way better at COD (some may say better then Kenma) but who is better didn’t matter to any of you, as long as you got to play together that’s all you both cared about.

Kuroo:

Kuroo and you have been together since you were in your first year of high school 

You met as friends first when you got him to tutor you in chemistry ( a subject you still aren’t that good at.)

Now you have your upcoming entrance exams for university in a month so your school has you doing mock exams in preparation for them.

20%

You look down at your chemistry paper that your teacher just handed you. 20%. You’re surprised, very surprised since out of all your subjects (that you go 90+% on) you studied on the chemistry test the hardest ensuring Testurou, that you didn’t need his help at all. But I guess it turns out, you did.

This failing mock grade put a blunder on your day, you didn’t interact with anyone and didn’t want to see your boyfriend so you skipped your usual routine of meeting him on the rooftop and went to the library instead ‘might aswell start early on your studying’ you thought.

As you were going over your chemistry topics, you hear an ‘ahem’ next to you and you turn your head only to find your boyfriend and his friends next to you. Kuroo with his usual goofy smile on his face. 

“Hey kitten where were you at lunch?” he asked 

“Needed to go to the library, Chemistry is kicking my ass” you mumbled 

“Oya” he said as he noticed your chemistry test laying under your textbook “20%, well damn Y/N I knew you were stupid, but I didn’t know you were that stupid” he laughed doing his stupid usual hyena-like laugh.

Ouch well that hurt. You slightly flinched at his words, “Really your name, you didn’t know the molecular formula for ethanol, that’s first year work” he said continuing to laugh “I’m pretty sure that’s one of the first things I tutored you on when we first met” 

His overbearing laughter was not good for you, you were already having a bad day and yes you do know your not that good at chemistry but you didn’t need your chemistry-enthusiast boyfriend to make fun of you for failing. Kenma and Yaku stood there awkwardly obviously aware of how bad Kuroo is making you feel but they didn’t really know how to stop his friend in the moment.Whilst he’s still dying of laughter you decide to pack up your stuff and leave the library.

You managed to get your Chemistry tutor to let you retake your mock paper in a week so that means, extra hard studying with no distractions you definitely can’t fail again. Since studying on your own was definitely not a good option, and you couldn’t go to Kuroo (especially after he ridiculed you) you decided to ask the second smartest person you know to tutor you.

Y/N: Hey Yaku! Can I ask you a favour?

Yaku: Hi Y/N what do you need??

Y/N: I have my chemistry retake next week, and as you know from your loud-loud friend I failed my recent test so can you tutor me?? 

Y/N: Pleaseeee

Yaku: Ok Y/N why can’t you ask Kuroo you know that he’d be more than happy to help

Y/N: Yakuu pleasee just help me out 

So there you was, nearly a week done with your study sessions with Yaku and you’re feeling way more confident than before. 

“Y/N what is the functional group of a Carboxylic Acid” Yaku asked

“umm... COO?” 

“Great! that’s correct Y/N” he praises i dont actually know if it’s correct or not

You then hear a knock at Yaku’s front door and hear his mum let the person in, Kuroo then enters Yaku’s bedroom with shock plastered on his face surprised to see you here.

“Y/N...hey?” he says confused “what are you doing here?”

“Oh Mori-chan is just helping me with chemistry for my retake tommorow” you say nochalantly internally smiling at the twinge in Kuroo’s face at the purposeful use of Yaku’s first name.

“So why didn’t you ask me to help you know I’m a chemistry whiz” he asks

“Maybe I’m too stupid to be taught under your tutelage” you mumble “since I seem to forget whatever you teach me, even when it’s 3 years ago... but ok”

“Y/N I-” he starts 

“Oh save it Kuroo, I have studying to do” you say cutting him off

“But I-” he tries

“So Mori-chan COOH is the function group of ethyl ethonate right?” you ask ignoring your boyfriend who is now at a lost for words

“ummm yeah it is” says yaku who is clearly feeling heavily awkward at the tension in his bedroom.

Kuroo leaves and you and yaku finish off the studying for the night, you did feel a little bad for being a bit mean to Kuroo but it’s karma for him being a dick to you. 

You wake up the next day ready for your exam which was first thing in the morning, before you hand in your phone you see a message from Kuroo,

Kuroo: I know you’re still mad at me, but I think you’re going to do so well on this test. You’re not stupid at all, you’re really smart and I love you < 3 

Kuroo: Good luck Y/N

You don’t respond to the message but smile at the sincerity of it and thankful for the boost of confidence it gave you before you start your exam.

Finishing the exam with a smile, you were confident you did well as everything you and Yaku went over was on the paper and you’re almost certain you atleast got more than 75%. You have to wait an hour before your teacher can give you your results, so in the meantime you might aswell reconcile with Kuroo.

When you exit the classroom, standing there was Kuroo who seemed to have been waiting for you for the whole duration of the exam.

“So how was it?” Kuroo asked, apprenhensive as he assumed you would just ignore him like you did at Yaku’s house.

“It was fine, I think it went alright..” you say

“Kuroo”

“Y/N”

You say simultaneously, he pauses for a second to let you speak “I’m sorry I was being so stand offish when we were at Yaku’s I just wanted you to see I could do it on my own, and when you called me stupid I really took that to heart since you and I both know that Chemistry wasn’t ever my best subject” 

“I’m sorry too, I didn’t mean to make you feel bad, and since it was only a practice test I didn’t think you’d take it to heart but I am sorry I know you aren’t stupid.”

Before you got to say anything else, your Chemistry teacher exited the room with your chemistry paper in hand. Kuroo grabbed your hand anticipating your nerves and gave it a gentle squeeze.

“Miss L/N” said your teacher “Well done on your chemistry test” he turned your test around to sure a perfect 100%. Both you and Kuroo gasped, you were elated to say the least you wanted to jump up and down in excitement but a PERFECT 100%.

“I’d also like to add that you have now got the top chemistry score in the school beating the previous title holder Kuroo Testurou” said your teacher, this made Kuroo open his mouth even wider in surprise nearly making you giggle at his response. 

Your teacher took his leave, leaving you and Kuroo in the hallway “ I guess i’m the chemistry whizz now “ you say wiggling your eyebrows just as Kuroo did to you before at Yaku’s this made him chuckle as he came to put his arm around you.

“Y/N don’t get ahead of yourself now, you may have won this battle but I will win the war” he said smiling

In the final exam, you continue your winning streak also getting a near 100% and still beating Kuroo which didn’t matter to either of you, now you’re just like him cracking chemistry puns and jokes all the time which none of your friends appreciated but atleast Kuroo found them SODIUM funny.

AN: Please kill me for the last line of Kuroos, I didn’t really like Kuroo’s since it was a bit self indulgent with my hate for chemistry but what do you guys think?

[izukult]

haiykuu boys react to a long distance partner surprising them

characters: hinata, kageyama, oikawa, sugawara, nishinoya, tsukishima

established relationship | warnings: swearing, my fan behavior, why are my head canons so long in this gd it’s like a tiny story without structure

hinata shōyō

-SUNSHINE BOY (i went crazy for this one i’m so sorry)

-you were sugawara’s old middle school penpal which turned online friend

-so obviously you’d heard about his volleyball team and the new first year star players

-and one thing led to another where he introduced you to hinata

-actually you were facetiming suga and you saw hinata and told your old friend you thought the tangerine boy was cute and then koushi “accidentally” put you in a gc together

-you and hinata have been dating for about four months

-you’ve heard everything to a t, including small little remarks from tsukishima to every toss, kill, and miss your boyfriend and kageyama managed

-side note but it’s so cute this boy is so whipped for you if you don’t respond for a certain amount of time he’ll find some dumb excuse to talk to suga just so he can shift the convo to making sure you’re safe

-anyway

-so you’re going to meet suga finally

-like FINALLY you’re so excited

-but you’re also boutta see your boyfriend!!!!!!

-buuuuuuuuuut your boyfriend didn’t know

-so it’s safe to say you were a little nervous about it

-you made suga swear up and down that he wouldn’t tell any of his teammates that you specifically were coming, but he did ask to make sure it was okay to have a semi open practice

-so you’re standing outside the volleyball gym with sugawara, backpack with hinatas favorite snacks over your shoulder. practice had already started so suga was late, but he still stood outside with you and let you prepare yourself

-you felt like you were about to throw up even though that’s shoyo’s thing

-suga walks in before you and you follow shortly after, holding in a sharp breath.

-there he was. standing on the other side of the gym, talking to who you knew as kageyama

-he hadn’t seen you yet, but other member of karasuno had

-”yoo who’s this hottie” bald, flirtatious, you had to assume its tanaka

-hinata was in the middle of jumping for a spike when he saw you, and he froze and fell to the ground, stumbling to keep his balance

-the gym got quiet at the tangerines reaction, but he was just staring at you.

-and then he was doing that “woosh” run he always told you about and before you knew it his arms were around your waist and his head was buried in your shoulder.

-everyone (literally EVERYONE) was looking at you two but you just laughed and placed a hand in his hair (which, holy fuck, is soft)

-you mouthed an apology to suga and he shrugged you off, and focused your attention back on the boy in front of you

he pulled back just enough to look at you, leaving his hands to rest on your back. his eyes were filled with tears (cute) and he offered you a smile.

“you’re here” his voice was quiet, for once, but it didn’t have any lag this time. and it was so fucking beautiful.

“i’m here.” you nodded, eyes scanning the features of his face. he chuckled lightly, a tear falling to his cheek as he shook his head.

“you’re so pretty.” his voice was watery and he moved his head back in your shoulder before you could utter a compliment back.

-he stayed attached to you for like minutes okay and this man completely ignored the teasing of his classmates.

-eventually you tried to pull him off you so he could get on with practice (and so you could watch him practice) but he refused to get off

-”bubs. babe. honey. you gotta get up”

-”hey hey hey, what about showing me a cool spike?”

-”i am literally asking you to do your favorite thing in the world sho,”

-”new favorite thing is holding you.”

-YOUR HEART

-eventually you did get him off of you and he practiced the HARDEST he had

-after practice he introduced you to everyone as his girlfriend even though you’d literally been introduced to them like an hour before

-his eyes stay on you and he constantly tells you how pretty you are face to face and how you smell good and how soft your hands are

-it would sound stalkerish if you werent whipped

-its ok hes whipped too

kageyama tobio

-no idea how youd meet this mf online

-maybe some volleyball forum or like arguing over which setter was betting in youtube comments

-or if you know nothing about volleyball,,,,

-i have no fucking clue BUT

-he doesnt mind long distance honestly

-he doesnt have to get worried about completely embarrassing himself and he never has to make like physical moves

-but he does wish he could hold your hand sometimes.

-but he ignores it🙄

-so you are like obsessed w this bitch u r in love w him🤢🤢

-and ur a good 90% sure he luv u too

-so you plan a trip to him

-you do it all out. you talk to his mom, you find the cheapest hotel that’s perfect distance between his house and his school bc ur just that cool

-and you even make up an excuse to kageyama for why you won’t be on your phone during the flight

-you know he’s gonna be at practice bc you know his schedule cos gf things

-you stocked up on banana milk (aka you brought like four)

-you hit him up yknow yknow

- “hey bubs i’m back<3 how’s practice going?” you’re literally standing outside the gym but you want to make sure you’re not coming in at a bad time

-after like three minutes he texted u “good:). just got done with a practice set.”

-so now you’re going and you’re excited and you’re Nervous

-you open the door and you’re met with a rly tall guy with a headband on

-“hi, can i help you?”

-“uh, is kageyama here?” and he turns his head, and you follow his eyes, and there he is

-and he’s already staring at you

-a ball is lightly held in his hands

-if anyone who didn’t know him saw him they would genuinely think he’s angry

-but it was kinda the same look he’d give you when you talked about things you cared about on facetime

-so maybe that’s love? 😳😳😳

you give him a little wave

-“sup kags”

-he’s just staring

-blankly staring

-which you should’ve expected

-“sorry, are you mad? i should’ve told you i was coming, that’s my bad i just thought i could surprise you and it would be really nice and then you wouldn’t be stressed out sorry-“

-literally why are you saying all this all of his teammates just like “wtf”

-he shook his head quickly and opened his mouth to say no but just continued to stare

-“i- uh- you want to watch me set?”

-you LAUGH. and i mean LAUGH girly and he just turns all kinds of red and you know his team is gonna be on him for that

-“yea! if that’s like, allowed?” daichi doesn’t care so you are literally balling

-you watch him play and like at first he’s REALLY awful like rly bad but then he kind of tunes everything out (i.e. you) and gets back in his groove

-afterwards he comes over to you and asks you what you think and he’s looking at you like this is normal but you can tell he’s shaking and he kisses your forehead REALLY REALLY FAST and mumbles a quiet “i’m glad you’re here”

-he opens up w affection more along the trip

-he appreciates the banana milk. sm.

-from then on out he constantly brags ab having a gf to the team

oikawa tooru

-he suspects smth is up to be honest

-he’s like “ohhh shawty gon do sum😫”

-(he doesn’t fucking call you shawty)

-but to be fair he figured more like you were gonna send him smth rather than send yourself

-surprise again he’s AT PRACTICE who would’ve guessed

-but this time you come at the end of practice because seijoh has like set schedules and oikawa tells you everything so

-you’re just standing by the door waiting for him to come out, ignoring the literal group of girls forming at the end of the hall knowing dAmn well they are your bf’s fangirls

-oh well

-you hear his voice before you actually see him

-he’s giving someone tips on their serves and you hear someone make a snide remark at him and you only assume its iwa

-he’s in the middle of a sentence and he just stops.

-there’s a good couple of seconds where he completely loses composure

-which is not tooru like

-you took a step closer and smiled

-”is this the oikawa tooru fanclub?”

-”nah it’s actually the oilykawa hate club” it’s the same voice from earlier and it’s definitely iwa

-you laugh a little and keep looking at your boyfriend

-”that’s even better”

-he just walks up to you and gives you a real, genuine smile

-pushes a piece of hair behind your ear

-and KISSES u

-EPIC MOMENT GAMERS

-”what are you doing here, pretty? come to see me play? if so, i hate to break it to you, but you’re late”

-you just roll your eyes and kiss him again

-once you two are alone he literally cries

-LMAO

sugawara koushi

-literally the only one who can keep his cool out of all these mfs (aside from tsukishima)

-however, when you show up to his practice wearing the hoodie he sent you like two months earlier, he lost his shit

-you set it up with daichi and everything beforehand.

-(and daichi literally made sure suga would look like a setting genius the day you showed up)

-he had just made a really good set when you walked in and you clapped

-”nice one, koushi”

-he looks at you like 😦 & is just like “you- what- you’re- how- why?”

-lol and then he goes on “not why like i’m not happy you’re here just how”

-and all the third years think it’s so funny to be honest, because typically suga can keep his cool

-he eventually gains his cool and shines you one his signature amazing smiles (which, is somehow better face to face)

-omg he goes over to you and once he gets there he turns to his teammates and like

-”this is my s/o!!!”

-mf is BEAMING

-he’s so happy

-you find out right after he gives literally the best hugs ever i live by that and i will die by that

-he doesn’t kiss you til you two are alone

-and its so fucking sweet and personal he puts his forehead on yours and tells you you’re the most beautiful person hes ever seen

-he is literally so in love w you

-ew

-i love him.

nishinoya yü

-ok he’s so loud

-literally the second he gets a gf everyone knows

-he shows the team pictures of you literally anytime one of them will look

-he luvs u

-he is your BIGGEST fan no doubt

-you make a nice meal? he wants to post about it

-you have a nice outfit? he will put it on his story

-you breathe? expect an “omg baby im so proud of u”

-so when you show up, he reacts the way you expect him to

-so like obviously this man isnt checking his phone during practice

-but he puts his phone on dnd and has you as his only favorite contact

-so you can text him if its an emergency during practice

-you know that, he knows it, the team knows it

-he gets the little ping!

-and he’s out the game

-no one is recovering the ball #peaceout

-he jogs over to check because you never text his number during practice bc you respect his passion for volleyball

-the text just says “come outside:))”

-he’s like wtf?? but bitch gonna do what u say😐

-he sees you and he just yells “holy shit” so loud dude

-daichi goes to call him on his language but steps outside and sees the short libero hugging the person they’d all seen in the photos, he just goes quiet

-nishinoya will not shut up as he hugs you

-he’s literally just hyping you up and asking you literally every single detail about how you’re there, where you’re staying, when you’re leaving, how your flight was, everything

-you just kiss his forehead :)

-literally only good vibes

-you guys have such a good trip bruh

-after you leave he literally just cries while looking at pics of you two together

-^ he took so many pics and vids of you pls

tsukishima kei

-unlike the others, you wouldn’t meet him at practice

-you don’t really know his team, nor does he tell you about them outside of mostly complaining

-you do know tadashi, but like you’ve only talked to him in a gc all three of you are in and never like alone

-you did not tell him you were coming because you’re 100% convinced he would’ve accidentally told tsuki even though he can keep his own shit secret lol

-you just show up at his door when you know he’s home

-and he’s texting you as you’re there and he had actually had a moderately rough day so you told him you were gonna order him food from his favorite restaurant

-which, technically wasn’t a lie you just had to make an extra stop

-you knock on his door (once you’ve prepared yourself because you honestly have no idea how he’s going to react)

-and he opens it ready to give a half hearted thank you to some delivery guy

-but instead his s/o

-he just stares at you

-he looks like a fish

-after like fifteen seconds you decide to try to break the ice bc you are nervous

-”delivery here for uh one…” you pretend to look at the paper, you’re doin a whole skit here “one dumb bitch. are you dumb bitch?”

-he just rolls his eyes and shoves your head

-he walks back but he leaves the door open

-”take your shoes off”

-he’s not even looking at you smh but you smile so fucking wide bc that’s the kind of reaction you were honestly hoping for

-(what you don’t know is he will literally break his whole hard exterior act if he looks at you right now and he is not ready for that)

-you put the food on the table and move to stand next to him

-and after a bit he finally looks at you

-and you look at him

-and you smile

-and he does too,, kind of

-(which is so fucking cute,)

-and you just keep starin at him and bite your lip to keep from grinning

-and after a couple minutes you clear your throat

-”can i hug you?”

-bro he’s so fucking whipped he doesnt even answer he just wraps his arms around you and puts his head on top of yours

-and he mumbles a thank you and its so fucking SWEET

-he does open up more the longer you’re there and u have a very good trip mwah in luv

[ben-the-hyena]

I suggested my idea to @prpis of Pandora and Zorak bonding through an alien MMPORG she would have gotten access to thanks to her hacking talents and becoming disastrous assholish game buddies and so many things, ideas and dialogues bloomed in our mind some days ago on Discord :

He is the first alien she ever comes in contact with after she pirated her way yo that alien network. When they met and he finds out she is a girl his first request is "tits or gtfo". After she pirated and revealed his credentials on alien social media he insulted her the virgin sexist gamer archetype way. They kept fighting verbally and in-game until they'd laugh it off and see that in fact they are as rotten as each other

From then on they regularly meet up as a team for the quest. Doing quests together and sometimes backstabbing each other if the loot is interesting. They also love to troll and attack and steal from other gamers calling them noobs and shit, and love to raid places where low levels spawn in order to kill them, loot them and win easy XP. On the contrary they get wrecked by higher levels. Doesn't prevent them from insulting them and sometimes have Pandora make them glitch but they often get rekt good. Or at least Zorak since sometimes Pandora uses him as a shield/belt while she glitches her way out ; she takes him with her on generous days. They would indeed often betray each other that way and keep insulting each other bur wish each other good night and have genuine fun together

Game and insults aside they also have everyday chats and confessions like all internet friends do "my sister is such a bore" "eat her" "lmao" "I'm serious" or "WAIT YOUR BOYFRIEND'S NAME IS DICK-" and he'd be dead laughing for an hour

While he would know she is a Earthling, she would just know that he is an alien but not the species for a while since all they would see is their custom character. He would pretend he's handsome and humanoid notably the early times when he was still thirsty for her gamer girl bathwater. Pandora would try for a good while putting all the pieces together and investigating until find out alone he has to be insectoid. Then only he would admit he's a mantis. Still unsure if they would ever see each other through cams after that but if they do you bet he would ask for tits again and she would hack him again

Despite being just online friends and him not hitting on Pandora as much as before ever since he saw how she would fuck up his account, Zorak being Zorak wouldn't mind turning her into a friend with benefits for once a girl is as rotten as he is. Not a chance, buster

Speaking of which Dick would be VERY jealous and suspicious of whatever guy named Zorak she plays games with. One day she would go to the bathroom and he would put on her headphone to confront him "greetings" "uh ? Who the hell is that ?" "I am Pandora's boyfriend" "ooooh so she DOES have one ? I thought it was just for me not to hit on her anymore" ".........I beg your pardon" A great rivalry would be born, hate at first sight. They would insult each other not the villain friendly way, either to each other when she is not there (or IS THERE, THROUGH HER HEADPHONE and she hates it like "seriously Pan did you even see him his dick ?" "Uh I am right here and 2 seconds away from destroying that playstation" and since she is annoyed and they keep screaming in her ear and her mic she goes "WILL YOU 2 SHUT UP" ; so much one day she straight up logged off right at Zorak's face "BITCH WE HAVE 3 QUESTS LEFT-" and sent Dick to sleep on the couch all night, they had ruined her fun "MEN") or making fun of one another separately when the other is not there just to Pandora. Also a lot of "neeeerd", dick (and size) jokes and gay jokes (Dick being effeminate lol) from Zorak and a lot of yells, alterratives insults, "holier than thou you illeterate" behaviour and "I don't care I'd crush him in [insert another field]" from Dick

One day Dick despite knowint nothing at MMPORGs would try to sneak in super unsubtly to stalk them with outdated gamer language and not knowing what key to press just to be wrecked by Pandora who wouldn't have recognized him akd was on a newbie wrecking spree. Poor thing was heartbroken and once she found out IRL she was a mix of laughing her ass off and embarrassingly trying to comfort

After that she would try to teach Dick how to play online game correctly (not without trolling him occasionally of course "now press that button" "ok" *jumps off the cliff* "WH- PANDORA") but Zorak would often log in out of nowhere to kick Dick's ass cackling like a maniac. Dick's hatred for him grew 1000% the first time it happened

Unsure if they would ever meet IRL but if so LORD HAVE MERCY ON ANYONE CROSSING THEIR PATH ON HIS OR HER STAY. She'd ride on his back with fucking guns while he runs around with his flamethrower both of them laughing maniacally. Also if it's him coming on Earth tension would be super high with Dick dragging Muttley with him to follow them in the Mean Machine bombs out and ready for anytime

With time and respective family lives starting notably on Pandora's side (stillunsuretogiveforZorakyetornot) game sessions would be less frequent for sure but they would still their new regular rythm even if less often than usual and if they more often are chats. No way to lose contact, they def became internet besties by then

[pikachugirl1250]

So

I guess no one’s made a post with quotes from the amazing Sonic ‘06 dub so here’s my master post:

“Oh man, I hope somebody fucks up the fireworks.” *literally 3 seconds later, the entire place is being blown up*

“O N E!” *said by Sonic in front of Elise*

“We always miss the ice cream airship, Tails!”

“Hey Rouge, hey Rouge, hey Rouge, we found the computer room.” “Oh fuck the computer room! We can play so much Fortnite in here, dude!”

“So, this is the fabled Tilted Towers.” *the whole cast bursts in laughter*

“That’s what you get for unironically having 69 in your name!”

“Going through the floor. Who do you think you are, Danny Phantom or something?” “My shadow...that’s how I got my name!”

*Mephiles (I’m sorry, Memphis) comes out, violently coughing, then laughs menacingly* “Welcome to Tilted Towers. My name is Memphis Tennessee and I am part lizard.”

“In your future, it looks like you will kiss seven girls. How lucky for you.” “Joke’s on you, if you a true copy of me, you’d know I’m gay!”

*after the Iblis battle* “And then we ate it.”

“I’m not even gonna pretend you were talking about Fortnite. I just really love bringing up my favorite game whenever I can.”

“They don’t treat you like a friend, they treat you like an item.” *the cast starts to laugh hard* “Sometimes I wish I could be more than just an accessory...but unfortunately, as a gamer, I don’t get respect.” “I’m not a gamer, so maybe they’ll respect me!” “That just makes you a beta cuck.” *the cast chokes in laughter*

“OH! OH MY GAWD, SOMEONE HELP ME!” ... “I had to trap Sonic in the hell dimension cause he disrespected gamers.”

“PUBG’S OLD NEWS, EGGMAN! Tetris 99’s where it’s at!”

“Tell it to us in excruciating detail, Tails.” “Well, it was a whole dream— Bye!” “You knew that was coming, you asshole.” *said by Ryan*

“You’re heavy!”

*both Shadow and Rouge turn around quickly* “Sorry, I thought I heard a cat.”

“All around me are familiar Blazes, worn out Blazes, worn out Blaze— IS THAT WHAT A HOUSE LOOKS LIKE?”

“I am happy with myself. I have a Positive Mental Attitude!” “Gawd I wish that were me.”

*a butterfly lands on Sonic’s nose* “This is food, Elise.”

“YOU MUST NEVER RAP AGAIN, OR ELSE THE WORLD WILL BE DESTROYED!” “Have you even heard my mixtape? It’s fire!”

“Aw dammit, I missed my opportunity on Sonic’s next album!”

“You don’t make this fun cause you’re sad!” “I’m always sad!”

“EGGMAN I FUCKED YOUR WIIIIIIIIIIIIFE—“

“I flushed them down the terlet.”

“Listen, you got any weed on you?” “No, what are you the only one who smokes weed here, Knuckles? Except for maybe Rouge. Rouge?” “Speak for yourself, motherfucker!”

“That’s the last fucking time you confuse me with that blue asshole. You did it once before, you did it again. You did it at our wedding, Rouge.” “You just look so much alike!”

“You know, maybe things aren’t so bad. I’m here, I got the nice ocean breeze. Just alone with my thoughts.” “Hey Silver.” “GAWDDAMMIT!”

“YOU HAD THE WEED THE WHOLE TIME?!” “YOU INTERRUPTED MY BROODING—“

“So, lemme get this straight. You’ve been dating...Sonic? The hedgehog? The blue one? Looks like this?” “I guess? If that’s my story arc, then yes!” *the cast snickers, then bursts into laughter as Amy examines Elise* “Yep, I can kill ya.”

“Wait, Sonic, which of us is the bride? Sonic! SONIC, I NEED AN ANSWER!”

“Go on, Shadow, don’t you support gay rights?”

“Here, do you want some weed?” “I do not have lungs, so I cannot smoke weed. But I will take it anyway, and put it directly into my brain cells. Here we go.” *Omega puts the weed into his chest cavity* “Downloading Weed.exe” “HOLY SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT”

“I was actually meaning to ask you a question: Are you seeing anyone right now? Cause there’s no one sexier than myself.” *Memphis chuckles* “Why? Are you interested because, um, I was actually thinking you and I are pretty similar.” “Bruh, I wouldn’t be asking if I wasn’t interested.”

“If you die in the game, you die in real life, Shadow the Hedgehog.” “How did you know Sword Art Online was my favorite anime? You should have known that I had terrible taste.”

*I would put it in Omega’s confessions, but the bit is that he’s being ignored*

“Shadow, you are my greatest creation of all time from the battle royale, and now look at you.” “Wait, hold on. Are you my dad?” ... “Well, if you’re my daddy, it makes the last dub horrifying. Gawd.”

“Now I carry around my boyfriend wherever I desire.”

“I didn’t have fun at all. My eyeliner’s ruined, my arms hurt, I got kicked in the head. I hate everything, and I didn’t even know I could do that.”

“How many times are you gonna run? I’ve captured you 17 different times!” “I feel like it’s gonna be at least 18.” *long pause, with a faint wheeze, then hysterical laughter from the cast* “The caucasity of this bitch.”

“If someone hacked into my Fortnite account, I’m going to have a birth of cactuses out of my asshole.” “Currently being hacked.” *Eggman lets out a high pitched scream*

“Hm, the desert. Count how many sand is here, Omega. That’s your first mission.” *Omega slowly counts*

“Omega! Count the number of grains of sand in this room!” “Omega slowly counts again*

“You guys suck. Really, I can’t believe I used to date you. You used to be cool, dude.” “Have you met me? I was really cool.” “You’re sexy as fuck, but you’re also a dickhead.”

“Omega, count how many mouths he has!” “Okay.” *was about to count, but Shadow interrupts* “Yeah, exactly! You ain’t got no mouths, bitch!”

“Silver, you know what? You’re a twink. Imma go smoke some weed now.” “How long were you waiting to say that?” “The whole dub, baby!”

“Silver? I’m almost proud of you.” *gasp* “That’s the most proud of me you’ve ever been!”

“Elise. Guess what?” “What?” “I can never die!”

“Now I have all the colors of the rainbow, and I can unleash my true gay power!” *maniacally laughs* “Now everyone’s my boyfriend!”

“I think the power of friendship can bring him back. If we unite as friends.” “I. Will fucking. End you.”

“I remember this worked well when I was trying to summon Animal Crossing for Switch.”

“You guys wanna start a polyamorous marriage?” “Sure!”

“Didn’t you guys feel that? That breeze? It penetrated my heart.” “Sorry, that was me, I farted.”

[surveyhoursss]

98.

Prep

I shop at Abercrombie, Hollister, American Eagle, or Aerospatiale.

I am/was a cheerleader.

I'm pretty ditzy.

I wear pink 24/7.

My looks are very important to me.

I can't live without my cell phone.

My hair is always straight.

I say 'like' and 'omigod' a lot.

I laugh 24/7.

I have a million friends.

I always hang at the mall or movies.

I'll only date popular guys.

I listen to rap & pop music.

I have at least one designer bag.

My myspace pics are of me making a kissy face or are mirror pics

It takes me at least an hour to get ready for school in the mornings.

Uggs + Miniskirts = Love

I don't have a job

I wear lots of makeup. (wouldn’t call it lots, though)

I can be stuck up or snobby sometimes.

I flirt with any guy, as long as he's cute.

Total = 5

EMO

I cry a lot.

I go to local shows.

I wear black everyday (typically I always have something black on)

I write sad poetry.

I play an acoustic guitar.

My favorite bands include: Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, or Panic! at the Disco.

I think about suicide or death often.

People have told me to cheer up.

I cry when I see dead animals.

My myspace/Facebook pics are black or white or angled.

I wear many band shirts.

No one understands me.

I don't talk too often.

I look down when I walk.

I wear black eyeliner.

I have an ex I still cry over.

My hair is black

My hair covers one of my eyes.

I always say 'life sucks'.

Total: 4

NERD

I have straight A's.

I wear glasses.

I always do my homework and study.

Lord of the Rings was a massive achievement.

Computer games.

I'm 'teachers pet'.

I've never had a real boyfriend/girlfriend.

I have a bedtime.

I use an asthma inhaler.

I carry a calculator with me.

I bring my lunch to school.

I always follow the rules.

I'm shy around the opposite sex.

I'm always on the computer.

I've never had beer or cigarettes.

I always answer every question in class right.

I correct people's grammar.

I read a lot.

School is very important to me.

I always stump people.

Total: 8

REBEL

I always speak my mind.

I have 0% of school spirit.

F*ck you, I won't do what you tell me!

I stand up for what I think is right.

On spirit days at school, I wear the rival's colors.

Whenever people are doing something, I do the complete opposite.

I won't listen to authority figures.

I always break the rules.

I refuse to compromise.

I'm always arguing with people.

I love debate.

I always do what's unexpected of me.

I don't give a sh*t what people think of me.

If I watch a cruddy movie in theaters, right after it's over, I'll say 'that sucked'.

I'm not afraid to contradict others.

I only respect my own beliefs.

If I don't want to do something, I won't do it, no matter what.

I laugh at compromising people.

I cheer on the rival's sport team to stand out.

Rules were meant to be broken.

Total: 1

JOCK

I'm on one or more sport teams.

I always wear my varsity jacket.

I've won awards for my athletic ability.

I will only date popular girls/guys.

School Spirit

I'm going to a college for sports

I watch sports on TV all the time

I'm muscular.

I play sports or exercise at least 3 hours a day.

Go Team!

I'm a chick/dude magnet.

I eat a lot.

I'm egotistical.

I'm too focused on sports to make really good grades.

I sit at the jock lunch table.

All I talk about with my friends is sports.

I go to lots of sports games.

I'm very athletic

I wear sport inspired clothing.

play at least 3 different sports.

Total: 4

COMEDIAN

I'm funny.

I'm always making jokes.

I interrupt class by making people laugh.

I like to entertain people.

I worship Kevin Smith.

I watch comedies more than anything.

I also watch SNL and Mad TV a lot

I'm sarcastic.

I've been told I'm hilarious.

I always imitate people.

I pull lots of pranks.

I always make sarcastic remarks after everything.

I have to prove myself by being funny.

People expect me to make jokes, always.

I have a lot of pressure to make everyone laugh.

If I don't make jokes, people ask me what's wrong.

Jim Carrey is my idol.

I mostly get along with everybody.

At pep rallies, I'm the one acting crazy and silly.

My teachers or parents tell me I need to focus more on work and less on joking around.

Total: 3

SHY

I don't have a lot of friends.

I don't talk too much.

It's not that I'm snobby, I just get nervous when talking to people.

When people say my name, others say 'who?'

I'm pretty sure mostly no one knows who I am.

People have told me I need to talk more.

I only talk when other people talk to me first

I look down when I walk.

I avoid social gatherings, such as games, dances, or parties.

People have tried to help me be more outgoing, but it never works.

I always plan to talk to more people, but I never do.

I sit in the back of the classroom.

I never participate in class discussions.

I hide behind people to avoid being seen sometimes.

I could never be a cashier, talking to strangers.

I talk quietly.

People have called me shy or quiet.

I usually let others decide for me.

If someone is talking about my favorite book or movie in front of me, I don't join in the conversation.

Total: 12

GOTHIC

I wear black.

I don't like to be seen.

I'm very, very pale.

I only listen to metal or emo-ish music. (neither of these is goth, mallgoths XD)

I love creepy, weird movies.

I love gothic cartoons and drawings.

I don't like people.

I only go out during the night.

I have black fingernails.

I wear a long black coat.

I also wear big black boots.

'The Crow' is one of my favorite movies.

I only date other Goths.

I love black humor.

I love pain.

People think I'm crazy.

I don't talk to anyone who isn't as deep as me.

I love to scare people

I laugh at teenyboppers.

People are scared of me.

Total: 3

WEIRDO

I talk to myself.

I say really random things all the time/have to say it out loud.

I fidget a lot.

I still use a wheeled backpack.

People laugh at me.

I walk really funny.

I have a very different sense of style.

I talk in a robot voice often.

I'll stop whatever I'm doing, and break out in a crazy dance if the mood strikes.

I debate stuff with myself.

I hear voices.

I'm obsessed with aliens and the other planets.

I have a fascination with robots and machinery.

I use really big words no one understands, and they give me weird looks.

I say random lines of babbling that make sense to no one but me.

I dart my eyes from side to side.

I always pretend I'm a robot or other weird non-human thing.

People have no idea why I think the way I do.

I have some very unusual, extraordinary talents.

When people ask me if I like something that's trendy, I pretend to be scared or confused.

Total: 3

ANTISOCIAL

I hate/dislike most people.

I prefer to be alone.

When people talk to me, I just give them a death glare.

Actually, most people don't talk to me.

People are freaking idiots and I wish they'd all die.

I live in my room, writing in my diary. On the computer...

I go out my way to avoid everyone.

I never greet anyone.

I despise people who talk too loudly.

I want people to think I'm a freak.

I never talk.

I can't wait to get off this earth.

I always sit by myself at lunch or anywhere else.

I listen to music on full blast on my ipod/mp4 player/headphones to block out the world.

I don't know why I am the way I am.

People have said I'm antisocial.

I use drugs or alcohol to escape the loneliness.

Why bother when people don't like you anyways?

I occupy myself so it won't look like I'm a loner.

I just don't get along with anyone.

Total: 1

SKATER

I skateboard to everywhere.

If I'm not skateboarding, I carry it with me.

I shop at Pacsun.

I'm obsessed with Tony Hawk.

Oh yeah, and Bam Margera.

I always play skateboarding video games.

I have shaggy hair.

I wear baggy pants.

I wear only skater shoes.

I always wear hoodies. (well, much of the time)

I hang at skate parks 24/7.

I'm always learning new board tricks.

Forget school, I want to be a professional skateboarder.

I've been skateboarding for over 4 years.

I hang with other skaters.

I've been hurt while skateboarding.

I've been in a skateboarding competition.

I wear vans.

Tony Hawks games win.

I've met some of my closest friends at skate parks.

Total: 0

GANGSTER/HOOD

I say 'yo'.

I also say 'fo shizzle'.

I wear extremely baggy pants.

Mah chainz hang low.

I hang with my homies, biotches, and Hoe's

I'm a thug.

I only listen to rap music.

50 Cent is my idol.

I don't give a frick about school.

I steal/have stolen before (as a child lol)

I freestyle.

I breakdance.

Gold chainz is tha way to go, biotch.

I'm white but I act black.

All my heroes are dead rappers.

Tupac is still alive.

I party with all my nigs.

I wear a sideways baseball cap.

I wear hoodies.

I wear converse with the tongue flipped out.

Total: 2

BULLY

I always steal people's lunch money.

Geeks are afraid of me.

I get in trouble all the time.

I steal people's stuff to be an a**hole.

People have called me a bully.

I have beat someone up before.

I'm always looking for a fight.

I pick on people smaller than me.

I push people out of the way when I'm walking.

I've never been in a relationship before.

People are afraid of me.

People know not to mess with me.

I'm taller than most people my age.

I pick on people for the fun of it.

I make fun of everything anyone else likes.

If anyone crosses my path, they're dead.

People know not to try and stick up for themselves when I'm around.

I'm one of the strongest kids in school.

Even some authority figures are afraid of me.

People get out of my way when I'm walking.

Total: 0

GAMER

I own at least 2 different video game consoles.

I love Final Fantasy.

DDR & Guitar Hero

I've missed school before because I was trying to beat a video game.

I'm always trying to beat high scores on games.

I even play a lot of computer games.

I play at least 3 hours of video games a day.

My thumbs are sore often.

I spend all my money on new video games.

My boyfriend/girlfriend has to be into video games.

All I talk about is video games.

I've been in a video game competition before

I pay over 30$ a month in online games.

I have bought more than 5 accessories for my console

I know about more than 10 cheats and mods in the game I play most.

I have played at least a complete week in the game I like most.

I wouldn't know what to do in an afternoon without electricity.

My parents often tell the internet is broken or simply disconnect it so I don't spend whole weekends and holidays playing.

I have more than one online account on the same game.

Total: 2

GIRLY

I have long hair.

I wear make up every day.

I carry a purse.

I have to get someone else to come kill a spider.

I paint my nails.

I use perfume.

I keep my nails clean/shaped

I shower regularly

I used to or still do Dance, Gymnastics, or Cheer/Pom

I like to accessorize

I like flowers.

I don't like to be outdoors.

I'm more like my mother than my father.

I like hanging out with girls than boys.

I like going to the mall/shopping.

I watch my weight/ count calories.

I plan outfits ahead of time

People say I have a soft/sweet voice.

I dream about and am already planning my wedding day

I watch dramatic shows on tv, soap operas, reality TV, etc.

Total: 9

BOYISH

I have short hair.

I hate doing laundry.

I like war type video games.

I like playing or watching sports.

People say I have a deep voice.

I'm more like my dad than my mom.

I beat up or tease my younger siblings or friends.

I act tough, it doesn't matter what's going on inside me.

There's only two emotions.

I shower only when I start to notice I stink

I think about the opposite sex a lot.

My room isn't neat.

I bite my nails instead of using scissors/clippers.

My clothes don't match sometimes, but I don't notice or care

I like to play rough with dogs.

I like the movies 300, Transformers, The Dark Knight.

The best way to get the opposite sex to like you is to act like a jerk.

I don't read

I don't ask for help even if I need it.

Total: 3

scored highest on: Shy lmao

[no-time-to-obsess]

Here With You{Jung Se-Joo} {Chapter 1}

Pairing: Se-Joo X Reader

Drama: Memories of the Alhambra

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Romance

Words: 3,000+

Summary: You never knew how much a game can bring such danger to you and others, but it has brought you and your boyfriend closer then ever. Your relationship going into a deeper level that’ll last forever.

A/n: I am so sorry! This taken forever to make and finish! School gotten in the way and stuff. Barely had any time to continue on this. Next one won’t be as long to make since i pretty much outlined ideas of what will happen. Later on you’ll notice i kinda rushed it so forgive me! This chapter goes in their past and the reader’s background and how they met! Enjoy!

Tags: @yzzxbel​

Key: G/n- Game Name

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

Before

“You’re playing video games almost way too much.” Y/n’s brother walked over, the girl on her phone, thumbs pressing repeatedly against the screen. “Hm? So?” She asked, mumbling to herself. “Come on.. Come on..” Her eyes never moved, the younger sibling rolled his eyes, having his hands hold his head up looking over her shoulder. “So? You’re seventeen, I thought you would be too old for video games by now.” He groaned. “Yes!” She cheered, sighing of relief. Just barely and finally defeating the boss after so much upgrade of weapons and armor.

Taking a small break from her phone to pay attention to the conversation, she looked over to her brother. “B/n, I’m seventeen and I haven’t even moved out of the house. Why? Oh- I don’t know, I’m not an adult yet-.” She smiled innocently as B/n scoffed. An older woman, appeared walking in from the kitchen. “Be nice, you too and eat your food, don’t play on your phone when your meal is turning cold” She scolded. Y/n pouted. “Yes mom~”

Y/n was a gamer, often wasting some of her money she earned from her part time job on new released games either online or at the store. Mostly spending her time whenever it wasn’t dinner of breakfast shut in inside her room on her PC. Of course, she was still a year underage which meant, if she didn’t come out of dinner or any events she had to go too. Her mother would just drag her out, and she can do that in a literal way but she would go out on her own most of the time. Y/n’s family including herself, lived in Spain for quite a while. Having been there ever since she was young and when her brother was just a baby while her father lived back in Spain to take care of the house.

After a long shift at work, she threw herself to sit in her chair, stretching after just changing. Going online in one of her most played games, she smiled when she gotten a message after a few minutes of getting on.

Master: You’re finally on.

G/n: Sorry~ Needed to go out with family.

Master: That’s alright, I hope you had fun :)

G/n: Thank you!

G/n: Did you find the boss while I was gone?

Master: Oh yea, I was waiting until you arrived so I won’t have to do it on my own.

G/n: Oh~ Great! Just voice call me and I’ll get my character ready!

It was like this pretty much everyday, Y/n got her headphones and connected it by bluetooth to her PC. The person she played with quite often for a while now by the name of ‘Master’ was on the other end. She smiled at the sound of his voice. “Hello?~” She called out to him, hearing a small chuckle in response. “Nice to hear you again as well.” He said with.a soft voice. “Less talking more fighting!” She pouted.

The rest of the day she was online, with her best friend. She never really gotten his name before, she should have a long time ago since they were friends for a while now but she wasn’t sure if he would tell her or not.

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

One sunny afternoon, Y/n went out for the day to spend some quiet time alone in a cafe she would always go to near where she lives. She knew the man working there, a nice woman worked there too she would talk to sometimes when she was there. Name by the name of Hee-joo. With a small wave that caught her attention, Hee-joo walked over. “You’re here a bit early today.” Hee-joo said placing a hand on her hip as the H/c girl chuckled. “Yea. My brother went out with my mother, going to run some errands before taking him to his soccer game. It’s kinda his thing he does here in Spain.” She said, taking a sip of her coffee.

“I’m glad you came here today then! My brother is here as well. He was kinda shut in his room since this morning and It was my job to have him at least take a breather from his video gaming.” Hee-Joo told her pointing. A table not far away from hers, there was a guy looking near aged at her, looking their way. Hee-joo raised her eyebrows in confusion. “What is it?” Y/n asked, sending a glance towards him. Taking a closer look, he had black hair, big rounded glasses framing around his eyes.  He appeared to be listening in on their conversation, noticing she was looking at him he turned away to avoid any further eye contact.

“Nothing. He was just distracted earlier, forgot he had games on his phone. He was playing it when I walked over here.” She shrugged making Y/n blink before shaking her head before standing up, her coffee was almost empty. “Let me guess.” Hee-Joo spoke up. Oh no. “You stayed up last night didn’t you?” The woman gave her a look that made her blush, shaking both of her hands to try and lie but by way she was looking at her, she knew she wasn’t going to get out of it this time.

“Okay. Okay. I did but I do enjoy coffee.” She pouted taking the last sip before setting the cup down on the table. “I”ll take that for you.” Hee-Joo sighed taking it. “Oh-“ “Next time don’t let me see bags under your eyes, or I’m having a talk with your mother.” Hee-Joo warned, walking away leaving the Y/n taken aback. “What- Hey!” She groaned, sitting back down. She suddenly heard footsteps walking towards, thinking it was Hee-Joo she prepared herself for more scolding but suddenly heard a somehow familiar voice. “E-Excuse me..” Y/n looked up, meeting the eyes of Hee-Joo’s younger brother.

Not wanting to label him as her brother, that would be kinda rude, she tilted her head. “Yes?” She smiled, making him slightly flustered. “I-I heard you talking with my sister.. You..” He paused for a moment trying to find some confidence to ask, as Y/n leaned in listening to what he had to ask, she had a feeling she knew him from somewhere before but she couldn’t place a finger on where. “You sound familiar.. I-I’m sorry, forgive me I just-“ Y/n stood up shaking her head. “Oh it’s fine! I had the same thought as you did!” She found his shyness to be adorable. The small raise of her voice made him perk up, looking like something clicked inside his mind.

“G-G/n..?” He whispered realizing that it was a bit loud enough for her to hear. Y/n’s eyes widened, now everything had clicked for her. Her mouth slowly opened in shock, the only words she spoke was. “Wait..! You’re..!-“ She was cut off before she could finish. “Ah, Se-Joo!” Hee-Joo appeared into view. “There you are, I didn’t see you back where you were sitting. You had me worried for a second.” Hee-Joo looked between the two, the shocked looks on both of their faces made her confused. “You two.. have already met?”

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

It was surprisingly the day she had met her best friend(in game). Finding out by him, his name confirmed to be Se-Joo. Her plans of leaving to get home changed to staying a bit more at the cafe and spending some time with him and Hee-Joo. She didn’t knew that he lived in the same area as her. She regretted not asking sooner or else they would have already knew each other in real life by now. Se-Joo was different in real life then she had imagined. He was quiet, reserved and shy. She wanted to get to know him a bit more better. Talking to each other in person was actually much better then in a voice call.

Y/n didn’t want to get into any specific details, but they did quickly became close meeting up in the same spot at the cafe when they weren’t at home talking to each other in game. The longer they had spend time with each other, the more it made him open and less reserved around her. They slowly in time had created a bond with each other. She never really told her family that she had just met her best friend in person but Hee-Joo was basically the only one who knew of it.

With Se-Joo, he felt ecstatic that he had a chance to see her almost everyday. She was the only person out of his family he would spend most of his time with, besides in game. Only weeks passed by quickly, when Y/n noticed that he was acting different. Not in a bad way, that was the thing that relieved her but he would look down when she spoke to him playing around with his thumbs, the sign that shows he was nervous maybe even shy like the way he was when they met.

Se-Joo would get flustered easily when she would tease him about something random or even lean close to his face to poke his cheek. Sometimes he would look to be deep in thought before she would speak up interrupting his thoughts. One time he stood up from his seat, almost making her drop her phone. “Sorry.. I need to talk to Hee-Joo for a few minutes. It won’t be long” He told her before leaving their table, dragging his poor sister somewhere where they can have some private time to chat.

Y/n didn’t want to go and secretly listen on their conversation so she distracted herself on her phone waiting until he came back. He did after what was about ten minutes. She looked over to him and smiled. Unknowingly to her, Hee-Joo was spying, peaking over the front counter to see how it would all turn out. She felt bad for doing that to her own brother, the recent discussion they just had was Se-Joo’s asking for help on asking out Y/n on a date.

…

He didn’t end up asking her that day which made the girl groaned and mentally face palm herself. When the two went back to hotel, Hee-Joo confronted him- more or less. “What was that?” She asked him as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I panicked.. I didn’t know how to ask her that moment.” He said. Hee-Joo shook her head while looking at the ground, placing his hands on his shoulders. “If you can’t ask her out then I will do it for you.” Se-Joo quickly rejected the idea down. “N-No..! I want to do it myself. Please.” He frowned. “Fine but do it soon. I believe in you alright?” Se-Joo nodded, feeling a bit of confidence come back.

Se-Joo needed a bit of more time to make sure he doesn’t coward away from a good moment to ask, when the next day arrived t wasn’t exactly perfect as he wanted. He just blurted out the question while stuttering the words out. “Y/n.. W-Will you go o-out on..-“ His heart raced nervously of ending the question. The girl turned her head to where her ear was. “I’m sorry what?" Se-Joo sighed before finally asked the question in a full clear tone. “Will.. you go out on a date with me..?” He hide back, having a fear of being rejected and ruining the friendship between them thats the last thing he wanted to do.

He felt a soft touch of a hand pat his head. He lifted his head, looking to Y/n who was smiling yet blushing. “Of course I will you smol bean.” That was the first time she had called him that. His heart skipped a beat not holding his burst of happiness any longer, he wrapped his arms around her pulling her into a hug. “Thank you..” Y/n didn’t hesitate to hug him back, patting his hair. “You’re welcome!” At that moment, he had a feeling that he didn’t want to let her go.

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

Y/n honestly couldn’t believe she was going out on her first date with Se-Joo. She never knew he would ask her out, although the way he did it was adorable to her. She had a feeling he never asked someone out before, which was fine because she understood how it felt. Y/n sort of had little to no experience going on dates, maybe third wheel dates but this would be her first time doing on a date with someone too! She was unsure of where he was taking her for their first date, he told her it was going to be a surprise so she had to wait which made her pout when she heard.

When Se-Joo had went home and told Hee-Joo about her response, he saw that she had started to get emotional and quietly sob. Out of happiness for her brother of course. “I’m so proud of you! Oh when grandma hears about this, she is going to freak!” She said, having the youngest one of the family come out. Being the little sneaky one she is, she did overheard what he had said. “You’re going on a date?!” She spoke into their conversation. “Is it true!?” She gasped as Se-Joo blushed. “Do you even have an idea of where you’re taking her?” She asked him with a suspicious look.

“A-Actually I do.” The two sisters looked at him. “I have an idea in mind where I want to take her. I know she’ll love it.” He said. “Oi, Se-Joo being a romantic, what happened to our brother and what did you do to him?” Min-Joo pointed a finger at him, as he gave them a small smile.

«────── « ⋅ʚ♡ɞ⋅ » ──────»

When the day of the date arrived, Y/n was nervous as hell. She was pacing around in her room, something she would normally do when she was nervous or anxious. B/n rolled his eyes having opening the door. “Ah Calm down!” He huffed, not really being the best at calming down his sister like that. “You just expect me to calm down like that?!” She whined, sitting down and keeping herself- trying to keep herself in one spot. “It was worth a try.” He shrugged. “Is this really your first date?” He asked. “YES!” She yelled. “Be lucky you’re going on a date in the first place” He said. “You were single most of your life I bet and you barely get out on your own without mom having to tell you”

Y/n glared, but at the same time she knew that was true. The two siblings were quiet and not a moment after the door bell rang. Y/n went back into her panic mode. “H-He’s here!” B/n smirked at her before running out the room. “I’ll get it!” He called. Yn peeked her head around the corner of the hall, seeing Se-Joo already inside, her mother just welcoming in with a bright smile. “Yes yes. She’s here. I think she is just nervous.” She told him as he quietly nodded.

Se-Joo caught the eyes of his date when she cursed in a short mumble and revealed herself in view waving shyly. Her outfit consisted of something warm and comfortable yet something she thought would be good for her first date. Nights in Spain can be chilly but it isn’t very cold, not even during the winter season. She just hoped it was enough. Se-Joo felt himself going into a dreamy daze. The both of them are thinking the same thing, as they stared at each other. “Alright lovebirds, go have fun” Y/n’s mother chuckled, watching the two of them snap out of it and nodded walking outside. Y/n hugged her mother and brother goodbye and waved, following Se-Joo afterwards.

The first date had ended up being one of her most memorable experiences of her life. Se-Joo was visibly nervous that it wouldn’t be as great and she wouldn’t be impressed with it but Y/n was already intrigued of where they were going. She wasn’t the type to expect something big and extravgent on a first date. With the time they had both spent together, she was satisfied with it. Se-Joo had taken her to a quiet spot away from public, he wasn’t much to hang out somewhere with a crowd. Spain was always filled with people at night. It was very quiet but with a comforting slience. At first, it started to become awkward, none of them spoken their gazes were averted away. Y/n started to fear that he would think this was a bad idea.

Until he was the one to speak up.

“You.. look beautiful” Y/n was surprised but was flattered, too flattered that she became flustered. Without wanting to stutter, she thanked him and smiled, not wanting the conversation to quiet down again. She continued making small talk with him, until she brought up the topic of their favorites games. Se-Joo started to get engaged in talking about it. The awkward tension from before disappeared. They didn’t have much differences except for the fact when Y/n shyly blurted out that she likes to sing when she is alone.

“When my brother was young, I would him to sleep when he couldn’t sleep. He would come into my room unable to sleep, usually from nightmares or his fear of the dark!” She told him. He wondered what would her singing would sound like. Se-Joo had a soft smile the entire time. It looked like he enjoyed about her talking about her family. It was the same thing for Y/n, when he talked about his grandma, and her two sisters. He still loves them even when he doesn’t make enough time to spend time with them.

On the way back, Se-Joo insisted that he would walk her back home.There was a small chill in the air, making Y/n shiver and hug her long sleeved shirt. Se-Joo gave her a concerned look and toke off his jacket, wrapping around her figure, rubbing her warms to warm her up. “You didn’t had to do that” She huffed, turned her head to look at him. “I.. wanted to” He said, shaking his head as it was no problem. After a while, Y/n smiled and wrapped her hand around his when her place was In view. She stopped in front of her door, taking off his jacket. “Here!” She said, giving it back. “A-Ah.. you can keep it.” He said. “Eh? But its your jacket” She said, pushing it to his chest. He chuckled. “You can keep it. After all, i.. don’t want to stop continuing after our first date”

Y/n hid behind his jacket, squeezing the fabric. Her eyes went to look over. “Really?” She asked. “Y-Yes-“ He almost fell when the girl attacked him in a hug, a soft kiss was planted on his cheek. Y/n didn’t want to take it too far since they barely went on their first date. “Okay then! Just let me know when the next one is!” She said, pulling away. He nodded. “I’ll text you later okay?” With saying their goodbyes, they parted ways when Y/n walked inside her eyes, running to her room and locking the door.

Her body slide to the ground, her back facing her door as she held his jacket in her arms smiling to herself like an idiot.

That was the story of how they met, and as Se-Joo promised that was not their last date together. They met up pretty often and in-game as well. Their relationship looked to be pure and sweet in anyone’s eyes. Y/n hanged out with his family more as Se-Joo done the same with hers. Around one another, they were at ease and safe. It was sort of like a romantic story you would read. Everything was perfect and alright.

..At least until things started to take a turn.

[adastreia-12]

tag frankenstein

I was tagged by @darkside-cookies thanks dear, i decided to do the ones that weren’t repeated and also english cause i’m me

nickname: i’m pretty partial to nicknames, have a bunch of them, don’t really care which one people use to call me but the most common one is Ele with like. the accent on the second e. sounds like elè. i use my full name tho.

gender: female 

astrological sign: saggitarius baby

height: 1,60

hogwarts house: hufflepuff *peace sign*

favourite animal: felines in general, love me some cats

number of blankets: i don’t do blankets, i do quilts. all year long. during the winter it’s not enough and I add a wool blanket, during the summer i just blast my AC to achieve proper conditions so I can keep my quilt

dream trip: save up, go backpacking around the world for a year, ideally with my boyfriend (and that’s why we call it a dream people)

where i’m from: greece

when i created this blog: 2016, not long after vld came out

why i created this blog: i had a personal blog when voltron came out summer 2016 so i made this one as voltron blog, it worked for the first few seasons, then i liked my dashboard here more and stopped using the old one, made this one my personal when i stopped being into voltron

time: 13:10

favourite band/artist: i’m going through a kpop phase and really loving ATEEZ these days

song stuck in my head: Joji- SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK

last movie i saw: uuhh... i don’t remember actually, i’ve been binging series instead. last series i watched was mr. iglesias on netflix, check it out it’s nice wholesome comedy about a teacher who believes in his students and does everything in his power to help them succeed

last thing i googled: quilt μετάφραση cause my bilingual ass needed to be sure quilt meant the greek equivalent

other blogs: @sing-to-me-muse is my writeblr that is more of an archive rn since i,,, don’t write that much (soon to change hopefully) and a bookblr that i haven’t kickstarted yet but have created and it’s on hold for now

do i get asks?: nope, just from one (1) friend tho i wouldn’t mind more

why this username?: haa well the thing is this username is kinda a result of my fucked up reading skills and the need for a permanent name across platforms. so yeah, my previous username was hagane-no-shiro (god that was a goddamn smart username, i still mourn it sometimes) while i was a voltron blog but after some time i wanted to make it a personal blog and was brainstorming for a username when i talked with my uncle who’s a gamer and he told me that he uses the name proteus across his online gaming accounts to stay consistent and i was like aha, this is what i need and i went on a list of female ancient greek names. one of them was adrasteia and i liked it the most. however, i read it as adastreia instead, and ended up liking the misread version better so i went with that. 12 is my favorite number so when the username adastreia alone wasn’t available i slapped a 12 at the end and voila. adastreia-12

(sidenote: apparently adastreia is one of the canon versions of this name which is cute, there is also a band called that, and adastreia was a nymph so that’s cool)

following: 250

average amount of sleep: about 6 hours. i don’t sleep well.

lucky number: don’t have one

what am I wearing: black pants, purple t-shirt

dream job: professional author, or you know, a formless blob in the great abyss that is not concerned with earthly bullshit

instruments i play: does coming to contact with a guitar for 2 years and a piano for a semester count

eye colour: hazel

hair colour: dark brown at the roots and sides, various shades of pink after a certain point, mostly a cold, pastel pink rn

aesthetic: i’ve answered this aesthetic thing before with a whole ass paragraph listing things so this time i want you to picture this: a quiet beach with no one else other than yourself, the sky is grey with clouds decorating it, there is a pleasant but strong wind blowing on you as you sit on the rocks near the sea with shorts and a hoodie on. you are not cold, you are not hot. the waves are crashing rhythmically on the sand and your favorite songs are playing without headphones so you can listen to both at the same time. you are alone. you are calm. you are a child of nature and she has welcomed you back in her arms. the world and its depravity cannot reach you now.

languages i speak: greek, english, veeeery basic italian

most iconic song: ac/dc either back in black or highway to hell, yes that is cliche but it is also the hill i will die on like mf braveheart.

random fact: remember that quilt I use year long? yeah my mom took it away from me for the summer and hid it and i will not forgive her that.

Music tag! Write 10 songs you’re obsessed with and tag 10 people to do the same 

Joji- SLOW DANCING IN THE DARK

ATEEZ- Illusion

Blackbear- idfc

Treasure Planet OST- I’m Still Here (Jim’s Theme)

Moana OST- I Am Moana

K.A.R.D.- Rumor

The Neighborhood- Daddy Issues

Sara Skinner- Bring Home the Glory

Ruelle- Madness

The Unlikely Candidates- Novocaine

Bonus songs: The Unlikely Candidates- Violence & Bastille- Blame

I don’t know enough people to tag tbh, that haven’t been tagged that is so whoever feels like doing this by all means go ahead

[gloriachua]

W10 - “Don’t You Dare Bring My Mother Into This”

Personally, I am not much of a gamer. The only game I do play and ‘invest’ in is Brawl Stars. Do leave your ID if you play Brawl Stars like me too :D Despite the lack of knowledge in the gaming area, I do understand what it means by the gaming community can be super duper toxic. I too experience toxic gamers in Brawl Stars where they get mad, give the thumbs down emoji and even giving up the game letting their team die. It will cost trophies if you lose, so it really sucks when you lose due to team mates who unreasonably give up the game and do not even try. Trust me, it can be SUPER frustrating. However, Brawl Stars is not so bad for they would censor all cursing vocabulary and we are not able to personally talk to the other players online. 

Can You Shush?

The real toxic communities in the game world would be the games such as League Of Legends (LOL), Valorant, Mobile Legends, PUBG and unfortunately that is all the games I know. I am not targeting any of these games, these are just the games I know that constantly have toxic arguments (judging form the huge gamers in my life which are my brother and boyfriend). Some of these games offer the function and option to turn on the microphone in order to communicate with their team mates while in the game. I would often hear swearings and offensive sexist statements whenever they (individually) are on their game with their friends, even when it meant being on the other side of the room I could still hear the shouting and swearing which are always CRYSTAL CLEAR. 

It’s Not Just Gaming Anymore

The gaming community today create games to encourage people to have social interaction while in the game. When one is on an online game, it is not just about winning the game but it is also the communication and interaction  between the gamers. Online multiplayer games are created to encourage players to interact (University of Jyvaeskylae 2007). Moreover, it will slowly turn into a safe space where people would go to release and be themselves. It will benefit the introverts and to encourage them to socialise more.

The Sexist Insults

Though chatting while playing games can be fun, the insults will come in whenever someone makes a mistake. According to Purslow (2016), when on voice-chat one will experience many insults filled with curses and sneered commands from people who considered themselves as “pros”. Most women in the gaming industry came forward by claiming gender-based discrimination, harassment and sexual assault from online people (Lorenz & Browning 2020). There was a trending video about how gamers would sound like in real life. One part in the video was when one of the guys insulted the other guy’s mother in a sexual way. This is the link to the video >> https://youtu.be/wHOO-0urwnU . Just because women tend to look small, guys would often make fun of each other by using female’s physique or personality. Furthermore, guys who are straight would also ‘look down’ or make fun of guys who are homosexual aka gay. 

You Just Can’t Win

The gaming community has turned into a space where people who are women and part of the LGBT community feel uneasy to freely join the gaming community. It is unfair for people online to target and use them as insults. Those egoistic narcissist of a gamer can be very toxic and cruel. Even if you are playing well in the game you may be ambushed as hacker. There is just no winning. Furthermore, it will be considered as normal behaviour for new gamers. 

Conclusion of GC

The world is cruel, however we are not able to control or please everyone. Our responsibility is to just do our part and not be influenced by these people online. They may be daring online but in real life they are just a bunch of wussies. Just remember to be yourself, be kind and leave other’s mother alone. Thank you for your time. 

References

Lorenz, T & Browning, K 2020, ‘Dozens of Women in Gaming Speak Out About Sexism and Harassment’, The New York Times, 23 June, viewed on 16 November 2021, <https://www.nytimes.com/2020/06/23/style/women-gaming-streaming-harassment-sexism-twitch.html>.

Purslow, M 2016, ‘Why are gamers awful to each other? The psychology of online abuse’, PCGames, 2 February, viewed on 16 November 2021, <https://www.pcgamesn.com/league-of-legends/why-are-gamers-awful-to-each-other-the-psychology-of-online-abuse>. 

University of Jyvaeskylae 2007, ‘How Does Online Gaming Affect Social Interactions?’, Science Daily, 20 September, viewed on 14 November 2021,<https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2007/09/070915110957.htm>.

[boy-banders-writings]

First timer’s luck - E’Dawn [Hyojong] (Pentagon)

Group: Pentagon Member: E’Dawn aka Hyojong aka little shit Genre: fluff (because if it’s not fluff it’s angst which I’ll get to) You just couldn’t resist trying Hyojong’s new game, turns out you’re not that bad.

Spending the weekend with Hyojong meant two things, lots of physical affection and skinship, and playing games or napping the weekend away. Not that you minded, you loved spending the rare weekend with Hyojong. Between his job as a DJ at one of the more popular clubs in the city and his college classes during the day he was always busy.

You were the same though, except you worked from early in the morning till the afternoon and all of your classes were either online or night classes. Your dumbass chose to double major and even though you’re almost done with both, you’re plate is full. So getting to just lay around the living room your legs tangled together was melting away the stress from the last two weeks.

Just like the last Saturday the two of you spent doing almost nothing, Hyojong was reclined back he feet resting on the edge of the coffee table with a game controller in hand. Some of your mutual friends had gotten him into this multiplayer-RPG-Zombie-Apocalypse game (damn Hui and Shinwon) and he’s been obsessed with it since. He was up before you were today, which is insanely unlike him. When you rolled out of bed at 9:30 unable to sleep anymore he said had been playing for at least an hour an a half.

After making something quick for breakfast that the two of you munched on, you curled into his side as he played. You put a relaxing playlist composed of both of your favorite songs to play in the background. You had planned to read ahead for class so you grabbed one of your text books from the table and started.

Maybe ten minutes and six pages of text later you hear someone screaming from the headphones around Hyojong’s neck and his cute little snores. You put the bookmark back in your textbook and sat forward to see what was going on. Hyojong’s character was standing in a house like structure in a closet, not moving while whoever he was playing with was screaming for him to do something.

You gently removed his headphones and put them on, adjusting the mic closer to your mouth.

“Why are you screaming so loud?”

“Hyung? You sound so girly!” A familiar voice teased.

“That’s because it’s not Hyojong.” You rolled your eyes, picking up the controller Hyojong had dropped onto his lap. 

“ARE YOU A MURDERER PLAYING IN HYUNG’S SPOT?!”

“It’s (Y/N) dumbass.” You winced from the yelling.

“Oh, hi it’s Wooseok!”

“You play too?”

“Yea, Hui hyung got me into it. It’s alot of fun.”

“Why am I not surprised.”

“Be nice, I’m here too (Y/N).”

“Hi Hui, who else is here?”

“Shinwon, Jinho hyung and Yanan. Hyojong was suppose to be playing but he...?”

“Fell asleep.” You started messing with the controls trying to figure things out. “He got home from work about 3:30-ish. I figured he’d sleep all day but he was up before I was.”

“Wow, you’re an earlier bird too noona.” Wookseok chirped.

“I know, imagine my surprise. Do you guys always have play dates?” You picked, hitting a button causing the character on the screen to shoot the door. “Oops.”

“Sometimes, we were all suppose to play later today when Hongseok has to work all day to cover for someone and I have a tutoring session I forgot about.” Shinwon chimed in, “and hello noona.”

“Ah, okay. Makes sense. How’s my favorite chinese kid?” You mused, knowing Yanan probably wasn’t full functioning yet.

“He is good, just tired noona. How are you?” Yanan giggled out a yawn.

“I was going to be a good student and read ahead for class but you guys are really distracting.” 

“I can kick Hyojong out if you’d like.” Jinho popped in, “Sorry, I was getting something to eat. Hello (Y/N).”

“No, it’s fine. I was actually curious, I want to learn to play.” You had figured out how to roam the house, pick up items, reload the character’s gun and open doors and such. The moving around part wasn’t too bad. “Morning Oppa!”

“Really? We can give you a run down if you’d like.” Jinho offered.

“Why do you only call hyung oppa?” Wooseok whined. “Do you even call Hyojong oppa?”

“We’re the same age, so no. I call Hui oppa sometimes.” You shrugged before realizing they couldn’t see you. “Look are you losers going to teach me to play or should I just leave?”

“Can you imagine Hyung’s reaction to Noona kicking his ass later?” You could hear the evil smirk in Yanan’s voice. “I’ll help.”

“That would be funny.” Hui admitted. “Where are you?”

“In some house, wherever you left him from earlier.”

“We’ll come get you.” Shinwon cheered.

About an hour later you were holding your own in the game. Your aim wasn’t that good but you had eyes like a hawk. You were on watch duty from somewhere a little higher than the rest of the guys as everyone searched and worked to kill all the zombies. The only hard part was the moving fight zone. After a zone was cleared the players only had a few minutes to move to the next zone. That’s what was getting your team.

The six of you had cleared five zones already, were working on the sixth when shit hit the fan. To clear a zone you had to eliminate all the zombies within the zone. As you moved the next zone things got harder and this was the hardest yet. The screen said there was 80+ zombies lurking in the 3mile radius of the map. You and Jinho were going off towards the north to plow through the zombies there, Yanan and Wooseok had taken the South and Shinwon and Hui had headed East. The West had the most so the plan was to take that on together.

Separating seemed like a bad idea after the South got ambushed and Shinwon and Hui both died within minutes seconds of each other. Yanan and Wooseok got separated going to take care of the South after Shinwon and Hui died. Just as you and Jinho were finishing clearing up the North a screech from Yanan made you throw the headphones off. On the screen his username popped up saying he was eating alive. In less than five minutes the team had dropped by half.

When you jumped and let out a surprised shriek Hyojong stirred. After a moment, he jostled awake when you jumped again, a zombie barely missing you. He watched you for a few minutes as he woke up and joined the world of the conscious. He smiled to himself, seeing you beside him cross legged and so into the game he loved.

He was impressed by how well you were handling things. It took him a few seconds to check your stats on the side. You were low on ammo and your health was below half but you were playing well. He noticed that Jinho and Wooseok were the only other players still alive. As he watched you play he noticed how well you were actually doing. You had copied some things he’d done before, like luring zombies into a building and throwing in a molotov, or moving up as high as you could and taking the zombies out one by one with a sniper. He was very impressed.

He continued to watch you play until Wooseok died and you panicked, then Jinho was ambushed and killed in the next zone. He could faintly hear the guys giving you tips on what to do and where to go for a supply drop. You had done the best out of their team of six. This was your first time every playing this game, at least to Hyojong’s knowledge, and you were dominating. He sneakily grabbed his phone and sent a few texts to Hui bragging about how well you were doing.

“Ah! Goddamnit!” You yelled, frustration clouding you judgement for a solid three seconds before you whip around to see if you woke up your boyfriend to find a dumb grin on his face. “Ah, morning... again.”

“HOW DID SHE LAST SO LONG?”

“Why do you phrase things so weirdly Wooseok?” Jinho grumbled at his younger friend. “That’s borderline weird.”

“SHE LITERALLY LIVED LONGER THAN ANY OF US AND SHE’S NEVRE PLAYED BEFORE.”

“BECAUSE NOONA’S A BADASS!” Yanan yelled back.

“I’d say I’m surprised but she lives with Hyojong, she can’t have spent all that time with him and not picked up some skills.” Hui reasoned.

A flood of praises came in complimenting you on your game play and how well you did. They kept saying they made it as far as they did with your help, they had never made it past the zone before you died. The last zone you played in alone was new territory. Hyojong sat there a huge grin on his face as he listened to his best friends praise his girlfriend’s skills.

“You might even give Hyojong a run for his money.” Hui picked.

“We’ll have to see later. I have a Saturday to spend with my amazing gamer girlfriend, say bye.”

“Bye Noona! Talk to you later!” Wooseok and Yanan chimed at the same time.

“We have to play again sometime!” Shinwon gushed, “Bye you two!”

Jinho and Hui both said goodbye as Hyojong was turning off the game console. You watched him take the headset and controller from you before setting them on the table.

“What happened to reading ahead?” He sat on the coffee table to face you.

“You fell asleep, someone had to play.” You shrugged. “I didn’t want to wake you up.” You hand moved to his cheek. “You’ve been putting in extra hours at work and I know you’ve got homework out your ass. You need all the sleep you could get. Besides Wooseok was yelling about something. I was going to tell him to shut up, but you look like you have so much fun playing I wanted to try.”

“And what’d you think?” He leaned into her hand.

“After some practice I could kick your ass. They said you were the best player so far, I can totally take that spot.”

He threw himself on you, trapping you underneath him on the couch.

“We can play together later if you think you’re up for it.” He nuzzled his nose into your neck. “Thank you. For letting me sleep. I wanted to sleep later, wake up after you like normal. But we scheduled and early game because the guys will be busy later.”

“They told me.” You threaded your fingers through his hair. “I get it, it’s fun. Just take care of yourself okay?”

“Always. Now, let’s take a nap.”

“But you just woke up Jong.”

“And?”

“Okay, then we can have lunch and play some more.”

“Sounds like the perfect Saturday.” He mumbled into your neck, his sentence already fading into sleep.

“Definitely does.” You couldn’t keep your eyes open much longer between the comfortable position and his body warmth. So you followed him into dreamland, awaiting you time to play together.

[datinglove07-blog-blog-blog]

50 Meet-Cute Couple Stories That Will Make You Believe In Love Again 

New Post has been published on https://onlinedatingloves.com/awesome/50-meet-cute-couple-stories-that-will-make-you-believe-in-love-again/

50 Meet-Cute Couple Stories That Will Make You Believe In Love Again 

1.I was waitressing, he came in all the time with his friends. Him and I became friendly, played jokes on each other, he grew to be one of my favorite regular customers.

Then, there were a few weeks when he didn’t is an indication at all, and I realized that I actually missed him. I didn’t have any of his contact details. I told myself that if he ever came back in, I needed to take the chance and ask him out.

Next night he came in, I guess we both had the same idea. He asked me before I could. I wrote my number down on a piece of receipt paper( which he still has ), we went out the next night, and we’ve been together ever since. He’s the love of my life.

2.Way back in 1980, I was working in south FL. A guy I worked with was retiring soon and had bought a vacation cabin in north GA. He showed me a picture of the cabin and posing in front was a dark haired beauty who he identified as his daughter. I remarked she was very attractive.

Forward a few weeks and he tells me the daughter had just broken up with her boyfriend, was in the dumps, and asked if I wanted to ask her out.

We went on a blind date, were married 2 years later, and now have three grown children and scheming where to go for our 37 th anniversary.

3.We were at a business networking event where the rule was that you were not allowed to buy drinks for yourself, whatever you bought you had to put it into someone else’s hand as an opener to dialogue. So this gorgeous brunette strolled up to me, put a gin-and-tonic in my hand, and introduced herself.

Hello, wife.

4.I considered him in the grocery store, and I thought he was handsome. I approached him in frozen foods as he was looking at a 5 lb. container of chicken nuggets. I asked if he was married, and when he said no, I asked if he would like to take me out some time. He set the bag of chicken nuggets on his head like he was about to pass out and we both chuckled. We are married with 4 year old twin boys now. :) 10/10 would recommend approaching a handsome stranger in the supermarket.

5.Soccer game. I was watching my good “girl friend” at the time play. Game ends and I go down to the field to congratulate her. Asked her where the other team was from, and I never heard of the place, so I said fuck it, went over to the cutest daughter on the other team, gave her my number, and here I am 4.3 years later with a girl I hope to marry. Having a pair of balls and saying fucking it can either pay off tremendously or back fire horribly.

6.I am a Match.com commercial for the wife. I had sent her a message after her account expired. She renewed her account, got my message, and 10 years later we are married with 3 kids and a dog.

7.We were both character musicians at Disney. We danced down the street together and couldn’t even ensure each other’s actual bodies at all, but the sweaty banter afterwards did it.

8.Online dating. Moved half-way across the country to be with her. I always wanted a nerdy-gamer daughter for a girlfriend and I got my wish.

Totally worth the move.

Cannot underline how fantastic online dating is to introverts, once you get over the ridiculous sum of rejection, and had recognized that patience is your friend, and lastly, learn to be honest and put endeavour into your messages/ profile.

9.OkCupid. After wafting through about 2 years of bullshit, failed dates, ghosting, etc I messaged this daughter. At that phase I was desensitized; why bother putting endeavour into your first message when 95% of daughters don’t reply?

I hit her with some genuinely corny father joke and she did answer and giggled. We got to talking, eventually agreed to meet up for a beer.

We agreed going in that we’d began with only a beer and lay everything out on the table. If either of us wanted to cancel the date we would , no hard feelings. A brew turned into two, was transformed into dinner. That turned into a second date, then a third. The first year was transformed into a second, then a third.

Now we’re engaged and simply booked a wedding venue.

10.That bitch t-boned me. She said she’d let me take her to dinner if we didn’t get the insurance involved. Having typed that out, I now ensure I get fucked that day on so many levels.

11.Worked together. I was supposed to have a party for all people at the job. My heat went out that day so I had to cancel. She didn’t get the message and presented up. Asked her if she wanted to take some shoots of of Jack Daniel’s and get “warm”. Twelve years later still taking shots and getting “warm” on a regular basis!

12.No idea where I got the nerve but she was sitting on a blanket alone watching a group of us doing medieval combat reenactments. Didn’t get a good look at her before I plopped down beside her and said hi. She turned and smiled and I immediately supposed,” Oh hell. She is way out of my league .” Turns out I get her on the rebound nearly 32 years ago. Still out of my league.

13.I was at a birthday party for a friend. He was the friend of my friend’s boyfriend. We hit it off right away.

14.We were both in a psychiatric hospital. We’ve been together almost 13 years. I was there for depression and anxiety, he was there to avoid a homeless shelter. I know it sounds crazy, but it kinda works out for us. We’ve gotten in a much better financial situation.

15.We met at a friend’s Halloween party- I have always been a huge Harry Potter fan, and of course, he was dressed as Harry Potter. The rest is history!

16.We all met up at the home of a mutual friend to go to a festival together. I arrived first and was told to open the door when she knocked. She saw me and said “You’re not mutual friend! ” We drunkenly hooked up at the party subsequently that night and are now merrily married with children.

17.I sat in the parking lot at a gas station. He parked his truck on the corner where you aren’t supposed to park. I screamed at him. We got married.

18.College! We had a few class together and he kept staring at me from afar. I went up to him one day and said hi, he fell the bagel he was feeing and I knew he had it bad for me. That was almost 9 years ago and we’ve been married for nearly 5 years. He’s the best thing to ever happen to me…

19.Reddit, actually! We were both active in a dating sub( a sub about a dating app , not a sub specifically for dating) which objective up creating a fitness challenge( members of the general notion began as, improve yourself so you can be a better partner and find someone !) We were placed in the same fitness group and genuinely hit it off. 3.5 years later, we’re planning our wedding.

20.On the train. He was on his style back from find a client, I was on my way back from working at a trade carnival. Neither of us felt especially like talking but somehow we didn’t stop talking once we started. We exchanged numbers and kept messaging/ talking backward and forward and started dating not quite a month subsequently. That fateful train ride was 4 years ago. We’ve been happy with each other( and uncharacteristically talkative around each other) ever since and got married last year.

21.First day of grad school, she was sitting behind me and I was typing on my iPad. She showed me that if I took two thumbs and slid them apart over the keyboard the keyboard would shift and I could use my thumbs easier to type. We are now happily married and typing on my iPad is much easier.

22.In the work infringe room. He was putting a Totinos party pizza in the microwave( poor college kid) and I was like, “Those don’t go in a microwave.” Married almost 12 years now, I’m still bossy but his cook abilities have improved.

23.I had a coworker who defined me up on a blind date with his sister in statute. It was a bbq at his house. When I got there, I saw this gorgeous female with an ass so fantastic it brought tears to my eyes. And speaking of eyes, hers were magical. So bright and when she smiles, her entire face illuminated up. Unfortunately this was his wife. Her sister was nice but not for me. I thought about the guys spouse almost every day. But I never acted on my feelings. A couple of years later, he got divorced and she called me. She had been thinking about me, too. We dated for 3 months and got married.

18 years later, still going strong. And dat ass … mmm mmmm mmm.

24.She was the first person to get in my taxi the first day I started driving cab. We’re still married 25 years later.

25.We both worked component hour at Macy’s while going to school. Unbeknownst to one another, we both had a rule of not dating anyone that we worked with. I casually knew her since she was a flyer and worked different departments, but I would find her every once in a while working the department that was on the way to the punch in/ out clock. One day, while entering the store for run, she was leaving and she tells me tomorrow is her last day. I asked for her number and we’ve been together ever since. That was back in 1985.

26.She worked at the cookie store in the mall, and I ran at a knife store nearby. I would close my store for hours on end to hang out with her.

27 . She was a personal shopper at Macy’s. My mom, appearing out for her son, told this really cute girl she was helping find a jacket for to” look up my son on facebook.’

Well, she did, and 6 years later( 2016) we got married, and my mommy died 6 weeks after our wedding. She was so proud of what she did. As we sit here expecting our first infant, I wish she was here every day. She would be so proud. I miss her so much.

28.Ok Cupid. First time I tried online dating, and I was the LAST person he tried fulfilling on online dating. I didn’t put a painting up, and “hes taken” a chance anyways. Married with a kid and a home 7 years later

29.We met at work and casually dated for a few weeks before I got really sick. I was hospitalized for a while and it was very traumatic. He insisted on remaining by my side throughout the whole ordeal, and we are merrily married 10 years later.

30.A few weeks after a really rough breakup my friends decided to take me out to cheer me up. I met my current SO at the bar that night and we hit it off. I aimed up taking him home that night supposing perhaps I just needed rebound sex( I had never taken a guy home from the bar prior to this ). He objective up texting me early the next morning and we’ve been inseparable ever since. He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me.

31.I was unemployed and had a job interview in the city( NYC) and was a few mins early for my interview so I stopped by a Starbucks to get a beaker of coffee( I know Starbucks is terrible but I wanted a cold brew) while on line I noticed her but didn’t do anything because I was focused on this interview. Anyways she had an issue with her order and turned around and accidentally bumped spilled her coffee all over me, she apologized and offered to pay for my dry cleaning and we exchanged numbers and talked texting and objective up dating. Aimed up didn’t going to that interview but aimed up get a better task so is not merely did I get the girl I also got a job.

32.I’m a commercial airline pilot and she’s a flight attendant. We fulfilled working together years ago when I was first start now as a co-pilot.

I’m planning on retiring early in a few years, she quit her job about 5 years ago to stay home and take care of our kids.

We own a bed and breakfast out in northern California my spouse runs while I’m away, and I’m looking forward to retirement so I can spend more time with her and the kids and helping her operate the place.

33.I was enjoying a cigarette on the smoking deck( designated smoking area) when a girl “re coming out”, sat down and said, “God dammit, fuck this.” I told her to watch her mouth. She said, “Fuck you motherfucker, I can say whatever the fuck I want to say.” We have been married for 10 years last February.

34.My church choir( college freshmen congregation) had seven women in it. I was the only human. After our first performance in a service, a girl came up and asked me who I was, and complimented me on being brave enough to sing in front of everyone.

A few weeks later she’s leading a mid-week venerate thing, and asks if I could sing something solo. I tell her yes, but I require an accompanist. She says she plays piano. I already thought she was cute, but when she started playing at our run-through, I was so breath-taken I missed my entrance.

It took me a while to ask her out, but four years later, we’re blithely married.

35.We met on Neopets as kids and became best friends. Years afterward we realized we were both into daughters so it worked out perfectly and we’re engaged.

36.Staring at her boob to drive a pervert away.

So we were in stage crew in high school. There was a healthy divide of 40+ girls and 4-5 guys including me. There was a lot of flirting, and well … Just naughty behavior all around. Usually boundaries were well respected and everyone had a good time constructing sets and props.

My friend, the perv in this story, is annoying this daughter and I can see her inconvenience. I walk over and ask what he’s doing and she responds :P TAGEND

” He’s staring at my boob and he’s not allowed to !”

To which I answered,” Am I allowed to ?”

She said yes and I proceeded to enjoy the sight of her massive boobs for a few seconds until I watch him in peripheral walk away pissed off. Afterwards, I apologize for his behavior and go back to work. She started talking to me more and eventually we discovered ourselves in a relationship now going on 7 years this July!

37.The day I gratified my husband in a college acting class. Our first class ice breaker was to walk around, and every time the prof said stop we had to stare into the eyes of the person closest to us.

We did this for 5 rounds. Guess who I had to stare at all five times?

We somehow got partnered up for our final acting scene despite not picking each other. We practiced for a few weeks and got to know each other and started going on dates after that. By the time we finished the class we were all over each other.

38.The scene: a shitty three tale home with a sinking floor supported by a makeshift pillar in the basement. Every surface is sticky.

I’m in the back, taking a break from my friends in the midst of a small party. I love them deep but also really wanted everyone to just sort of disappear for a little while. You know, how you usually feel on a Friday night that feels exactly like the last two dozen Friday nights.

I needed someone to complain to about how much I disliked everyone else at the party at that moment. Assure a cute redhead I vaguely recollected from one class and was drunk enough to launch into a little ranting without much of an introduction. Turns out she need to rant too.

39.First class on my first day in college, I see this beautiful girl waiting outside my class for the professor to unlock the door, and realise I have to be with her.

We started dating after a few weeks, and are married now.

Love at first sight.

40.We met at work! We get hired 6 months apart to design bridges and neither of us had ever designed a bridge before, although we had all the needed qualifications to make our boss believe we were capable of learning this.( In other terms, we were both fresh out of engineering grad school and had a strong background in analysis .)

Our desks were side by side, and we liked each other immediately. Our dynamic was very much” office spouse/ office spouse “. It stayed like that for two years. He was very good at designing bridges, as it turned out, and moved up speedily. I was merely ok at designing bridges, and was not moving up, so I took a chore in a different department( thankfully, I have moved up well here ), and after I left, we realized we missed each other, and started dating.

We live together now, and couldn’t be happier.( He still designs bridges .)

41.College my sophomore year. I was on the men’s lacrosse squad and she was on the women’s lacrosse team. It was the first week of school( I only transferred from another college) and I was sitting with a few people at lunch. She strolled in and I asked my friends who she was and they let me know. I said ” I’m going to end up marrying that daughter .” She had a BF of 5 years( afterward found out that he was a dick) at the time and some guy that plainly liked her said ” good luck trying to get that …” She eventually sat down at the same table as me and we chatted. Apparently one of the other girls on her squad let her know what I said about marrying her later that day. I received a text a few hours later from a random number and it was her. That’s where it all started. We were very good friends for a while and she eventually aimed things with her bf and we started dating a few months later. We have been together for 6 years and we are getting married next year.

42.She sat down next to me on the first day of grad school. We both were into Neil Gaiman and Modern Poetry. I let her borrow the first few trades of The Sandman.

After that we started hanging out more, I demonstrated her around the city( she was from out of township ). Bought her a develop pass with $20 on it, but I was slacken to make a move. If it wasn’t for her roommate saying,” Dude, guys don’t buy develop pass for you if they don’t like you ,” we might not be together.

Been together 7 years.

43.She was my waitress when I was out with some friends. I left my number( first and only time ever) she called and 19 years later we are still together.

44.I was really into Scott Pilgrim vs The World when it came out in theaters when I was in high school. Bought all the graphic fictions, find it 4 times in theaters, bought the soundtracks, and bought the video game when it came out. I was obsessed.

After classes aimed and as I would stroll to the bus, I noticed on occasion this daughter walking down the dorms wearing a Scott Pilgrim shirt. I had to meet this girl!

Well the day came during a field trip to Gettysburg and there she was wearing the shirt. I get so nervous, had to work up the heroism, and she was also with a friend who is best friend’s with my previous girlfriend. Oh boy this was going to be tough.

Ended up not being too bad. I asked her the obvious question if she was a Scott Pilgrim fan and we hit it off from there surprisingly. Even more a coincidence, when we got to the buses, all I wanted to do was talk to her more about Scott Pilgrim and we didn’t because she sat next to her friend but she was a seat behind me, this entire field trip. It was destiny.

Anyways we’re close to 8 years strong together and will watch Scott Pilgrim once a year.

45.We fulfilled online on this is something that cringey anime-themed roleplay website and have been together for 4 years and married now. We try to forget about the site but some times we reminisce and wince together.

46.His mothers bought the house next to my grandparents home when his mommy was pregnant with him and I was two. I assume that I satisfied him when he came home from the hospital? It’s not something I recollect, he’s just always been a part of my life.

There was a period of time where we hadn’t seen each other for over eight years, and one night I was Facebook stalking a second cousin of mine and my old childhood friend’s mommy popped up! Through her I detected him, reached out, and within three months we were dating. Next month we celebrate our third marriage anniversary.

47.We were in the same class for a program for people on welfare.

Soon after the conflicts aimed, I determined a task in the city. I recommended that she apply since we were still hiring, and she got hired too! Not soon after that, I helped her out by letting her know my home had a room open to rent( 1 house 5 bedrooms, I was a tenant ), and she moved in. I wasn’t seeking any kind of relationship with her.

One day I heard her chuckling while watching Youtube and it was the most beautiful and genuine laugh. I thought to myself “fuck”. A couple weeks later we were watching Stranger Things and we started holds hands and cuddling.

We’re getting married next year

48.Technically we shared a hospital room at birth. Both our moms were stuck together. My mom is his aunt’s best friend( 20+ years ). The session we remember came subsequently. About 6 years old. I told him he was ” super duper handsome” and leaned in to kiss him because I’d seen it on a show. He kicked me in the vagina and ran away.

The boy aimed up chasing me for years. We ultimately started dating at 18 and now 10 years and 2 beautiful sons later, we are still going strong!

49.In a hot tub. I was about 14 and her best friend was dating my best friend. I set my limb around her and said ” do you come here often ?” Knowing it was an extremely cheesy pickup line. Now, about 16 years later, I still use that line on her when she’s in the bathroom, in bed, in the kitchen…

50.I was very drunk at a house party in college and was building my way to the bathroom to run throw up when I insured a girl who just lost a drinking game, and had to chug a beaker of a bunch of different alcohols. She was like she actually didn’t want to, and I figured since I was going to go throw up anyway, I might as well do it.

Read more: thoughtcatalog.com

[metazensae]

eyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy putting a cut in this so you guys don’t have to read my weepy self-pity bullshit

DISCLAIMER: This post is about my lonely tenancies and struggles with friendship. I believe people growing apart is a natural thing that happens for various reasons and that no one should shoulder any blame for it. Furthermore, my purpose for posting this here is not for anyone to feel bad on my account, and thus, I’ve been teetering on whether to post this or not. However, I ultimately decided I needed to do this bc writing my thoughts out helps me process my grievances and move on.

I’ve pretty much been a loner my whole life. I’ve had friends sure, but no one was close. None of my peer friendships ever felt real to me, like I couldn’t trust “friendship” as a real thing, like people were simply tolerating my existence or saying nice things about me because it was the polite thing to do. I have a pretty screwed up sense of basic trust just in general, so it’s really hard for me to be vulnerable around other people - made worse from the advice my family gave me. My personal favorite was, “Tell not your secrets to your friends, because when your friends become your foes, your secrets get exposed.” <---- great for making me, someone who already has a defunct sense of basic trust, distrust others even more.

That said, it’s not like I’m not sociable. I’ve just always been a satellite of multiple groups, usually centered around something I was interested in. The band group, the anime/gaming group, the smart group, the “same class” group. Always a satellite, always moving between them. I didn’t like people telling me how I should or shouldn’t behave, so if they tried - if they tried to force me into anything I wasn’t already interested in, I moved on. But that also meant I had no one close to me. I was too preoccupied with preserving myself as I was and leaving before they could leave me.

It was fine because I had “real friends” at home - my sister and cousin. But when I hit my high school years, my sister got married and moved away, and my cousin got a boyfriend and dropped out of existence. I was truly alone for the first time.

That’s when depression took some very deep holds inside of me, and I still struggle daily with a very fragile state of mental health.

The internet is where I would go when I had no where else. I’ve had pretty much every type of blog and journal site over the years, keeping separate accounts for “public Izzy” and “depression Izzy (or.. Zensae, as my emo alter-ego was named). At any rate, tumblr has been pretty consistent for me since 2009. Previously, mine was filled with irl friends, but when my irl friends phased tumblr out of their daily routines, it became harder and harder to use. I kept it going tho because I liked the format, I liked the visual nature of the posts. I liked how it could post so many different types of media (vs Myspace and Facebook and twitter was just text tweets back then). I liked the anonymity too.

Today, I live pretty far from all irl friends and family. I only have my husband and cats and a few colleagues (who do not share my interests beyond our professional careers). In effect, aside from my husband and cats, I am friendless in a city where it is difficult to meet other people at all.

But last year, I found a community of artists on tumblr, and for the first time I felt like I had real friends who were supportive and shared my interests. These amazing people pulled me out of my decade of deep depression and I grew a TON as a creator just by association with their passion and skills. It was pretty much a golden year for me in that regards, but all things inevitably change. Life takes us down different paths, and I’m finding myself incredibly alone again.

But AH-HAH! We live in the age of connectedness - we don’t necessarily have to lose contact because there are so many other ways, right? Yes. There are. And I’ve tried them, but all of the other sites fill me with such negative emotions that I break down. I’m overwhelmed by my knowledge of  what everyone else is doing and saying. I find myself dwelling on every complaint, on every negative news story, on every comment left by every rando, on every interaction of my friends in which I am not included, where I’m very much just a lurker, a ghost, a memory - forgotten entirely.

And I become so overwhelmed. The world surely spins without me. Would anyone care if I am in it or not? 

A series of thoughts emerge from the ether as I imagine my friends existing happily in a world without me, and I, standing on the other side of a glass wall, reflect upon the reasons for my solitude.

Am I not included because I’m unlikable? Because I’m not a good enough friend? Because my negativity drove them away? Or... is it because we were never really friends? Because everything is infinitely more interesting than me? No... maybe because I’m a burden? Ah... no, it’s because they were just being nice all those times, because because because because because....

There are 12 million reasons. Maybe all of them are true. Maybe none of them. But all of them hurt, and I can’t shut any of them out.

I expressed this to my husband, how I feel like my friends and I are drifting apart, and that I have no idea what to do about it because reaching out in other ways is increasing my level of sads. He noticed this as well and even pushed the wrinkles in my forehead as I tried to use twitter this afternoon.

He told me about his relationships with other online gamers, and how he went through a similar thing several times as people quit playing the particular games, but the bottom line is this: we make online friends so easily, and we lose them easily too - when our interests change, when something new enters our lives, when the stresses of daily life take precedence. It’s normal.

But knowing that doesn’t fill this gaping hole in my heart. There’s so much that I owe to you all - from the grace and care you’ve shown me as I navigated all the curveballs life has thrown me lately, and also with helping me maintain my motivation levels to keep making FoB. And also, in everything I learned from you and with you as I grew as a person and an artist. I am immensely grateful for my friendship with all of you.

But idk...

Everything seems so fragile and in limbo?

I don’t want to force anyone to come on this site if they don’t want to? I don’t want to force anyone stay the same? Finally, I don’t want to beg anyone for attention or validation at all!

But it feels like I’m doing all of these lately, and it’s not ok. In this case, I just need to withdraw and reexamine myself.

I just want you guys to do you and keep excelling. If that means it takes you away from me, then...

I guess our paths were meant to diverge.

But you can bet I’ll still be cheering from the sidelines... just maybe a bit farther away than I anticipated.

[krkrandstuff]

Kristin ponders about Kristin

still trying to figure myself out..

It’s hard to talk about struggling when there is nothing outwardly wrong and there has never been. Am I even struggling or am I just whining? Why can’t I move forward? Why am I stuck?

Lemme summarize and hopefully not ramble too much but this post is for me mainly, soooo, you know. My homelife has been idyllic, happy, I guess. No struggle, nothing traumatic. I’d call it vanilla. Everything was fine. Emotionally, maybe not so much, but growing up is a time of change, right?

I had some body image issues start up in intermediate school, but who doesn’t, honestly? Being a tall and fat female surrounded by petite and cute girls - I felt stupid wanting to be what they were. I shouldn’t be wearing makeup, shopping for skirts and dresses, liking ‘girly’ things, or revealing any bit of my figure. I felt I looked manly. I felt I would be an impostor. I felt that I hated them for having that whatever it was (it’s called confidence, Kristin). It was just better to avoid attention by wearing over-sized shirts and unintentionally ill-fitting jeans. How I ‘felt’ was a lie. Therapy in my early 20s helped with this and I realize now I’m heckin’ cute regardless of what I’m wearing. Oh, and I realized pink is an awesome color. Therapy.. it does help sometimes.

I’ve had some slumps of depression along with a steady stream of ‘eh’-veryday depression. I remember sitting on the playground in 4th grade tracing cracks in the asphalt with a woodchip for ‘fun’ because I had no friends in my class or in my school wing and my teacher wouldn’t let me stay inside to read. It wasn’t fun. That scenario repeated itself in sophomore year high school as none of my friends had a schedule that lined up with mine - not even lunch. We had been together constantly in junior high; to go from that to barely a glimpse of them my first year in a new building was awful (grades 10-12 were at the h.s.). While they ate together, had stories to tell from class, and did group projects together, I was alone. No amount of hanging out on the weekends made me feel like I wasn’t missing out. The following year, I was reunited with them until we graduated, and then all was reasonably well until we went our separate ways yet again.

University started. I tried being a typical college student. I joined some clubs. I did regularly go to my classes. I tried to meet people. I tried to have fun. My hometown friends were doing all these things and more at their schools, why couldn’t I? Eventually, I felt like my being there did not matter one way or the other. Miserable for a variety of reasons, I ended up transferring from one small university to another closer to home. The few people who reached out to me were surprised I was gone - I hadn’t told them as I hadn’t expected them to notice.

I tried again at my new university - joining a bible study, the anime club, and an Asian culture club. I slowly stopped trying. Again, I felt like my presence was negligible and unnecessary, so I withdrew into myself. I whittled my routine down to class, eat, screw around until everyone was asleep, study/work on projects, sleep. I would avoid the school building when I knew my classmates would be there outside of classtime. I even avoided the dining halls and c-stores if I couldn’t be there right when they opened (and were emptiest). I couldn’t focus unless the world was asleep, so working until dawn and beyond became a regular occurrence. I did all I could to avoid others while slowly drudging toward graduation.

Looking back, I can see the depression and anxiety eating at me. They still nip at my heels and make ugly reappearances, but I can mostly deal with them now thanks to therapy my parents forced me into attending due to a post-uni depression slump. The Buproprion I’m on helps some too. I just feel like there is still something more to be dealt with. Something that is still interfering with my life today.

All my life, I’ve been the worst procrastinator. Annoying assignments, enjoyable assignments, I would put them all to the last moment. In Viscom II, we got to design a CD case for our favorite band and I still could not work on it until the night before it was due. I would escape the guilt telling me to work by working on ‘beneficial’ hobbies. Reading is good for my education, so read more instead of working quite yet. Personal artwork was much the same. Why wouldn’t I work on my assignments ahead of time? Maybe it was that I couldn’t. In high school. I vividly recall cleaning the fridge at home top to bottom to prolong working on an essay. I used to blame laziness, but now I think it’s an inability to focus. Self-diagnosing oneself is frowned upon, but I do wonder if I have ADD. Eight paragraphs and I finally get to what I actually wanted to reflect on and ponder! Sorry self and any determined reader for the tangents. 

Current me, post-college, working a salaried 7:30-4:30 job, has been having struggles lately. My struggles stem from a worsening ability to focus at work and complete failure to do anything but ‘potato’ at home. I cannot procrastinate my work, certain tasks must be completed within certain time frames or our company faces consequences due to my inaction. However my brain still prefers to focus on every conversation and phone call around me so I can interject with information or a comment (sorry if I’m that annoying person, coworkers). My brain wants to think and talk about different cheesy dishes I desire to try and oh, where to buy Greek cheese to make saganaki. Let’s google that for 10 minutes at 8 in the morning for some reason (that train of thought was this past Thursday). Sometimes my brain gets overloaded listening to all these conversations while the printer is going, the phone is ringing, and someone is trying to get my attention. Sometimes I’m hopping between so many little projects that one more request pushes me to tears. 

There are times I want to scream, cry, and run away. None of those are office-appropriate behavior. I feel so wound up by pushing myself through my day that coming down from that at home takes all evening. That is what I call ‘potato-ing’. I zone out to Youtube and Reddit until it’s time to sleep and do it all over. I don’t know how people accomplish anything with their evenings. All I have as far as daily commitments are my job, a loving boyfriend, and two cats and still I do not have the mental energy for a fulfilling evening.

I used to define myself as a reader. I was an artist. I was a gamer. Except for the odd occasion, I don’t do these things anymore. I have a list of books I’ve been meaning to read, but I can’t find the energy to pick them up. I used to have a vivid imagination - much of it stemming from things I’ve read or watched. The source stopped, so I stopped having ideas for what I wanted to draw. I also can’t procrastinate at work, so drawing as a procrastination method is a no-go. I used to have a large list of fandoms I enjoyed, now I couldn’t name any. Some I did outgrow, but mostly, I haven’t been consuming new media because I can’t commit the energy to do so. When I do manage to start a drawing or a new book, I cannot stop. If I stop, I will never finish or go back to it. It is all or nothing.

The only time I feel clear-headed is after everyone has gone to sleep/away and I have had hours to unwind and I am left with perfect solitude. Only then do the inklings of my old pastimes try to make themselves known. Right now, I still don’t usually have the energy to act on them. I’m only able to write this long-ass mess as Joshua has gone to the game shop for the evening. It’s just me, the cats and, the rain outside. 

I did do some reading on ADD in women online. The checklist on ADDitude’s site resonates with me a lot and so do posts from redditors on the ADHD subreddit. I feel choked by how much ‘stuff’ I have. Not even close to being a hoarder, but I feel like I can’t keep up or keep these things organized. I shutdown sometimes at work when I feel overloaded. I shutdown sometimes at the grocery store because of the number of bodies and the noise and chaos. I feel like I can’t keep up with what people demand of me, socially and at work.  I do start the day wanting to accomplish so much and when I fail because I can’t get the ball rolling, my depression just eats that up. 

Writing this all out makes it clearer to me that this is not normal. It is not normal to feel hollow like this. There are things I want to accomplish, but I can never get to them. I can’t get moving. I feel frustrated. I feel sad. I feel stuck. 

I, and medical professionals (probably), never considered ADD might be the culprit as, despite being a procrastinator, I always finished my assignments. I can count on one hand the few that I didn’t. I was primarily a straight A student (until college). I didn’t have any obvious focus issues in class. I don’t live in total chaos (probably because my anxiety goes berserk when there is too much clutter). I’m not all over the place, at least on the outside. I look at my sister who does have ADHD and I can very obviously tell when she’s taken her meds or not. These classic symptoms don’t fit me, but the others do.

I’ve addressed the depression and the anxiety and avoidant behaviors (that I didn’t touch on here). This last beast remains to be conquered. If it’s not ADD, it’s something. Something that I can’t handle on my own.  I’m going to talk to my primary care when I go in this month. She’ll probably tell me I need to see a psychiatrist again, but this time I think I will take that advice. I’m tired of feeling like this. 

Fingers crossed for an answer and hopefully a solution. 

Thanks for coming to to my TedRamble. :P

[thealesanauniverse]

One thing that I regret the most my whole life

Okay Steven, you are so nosy 😂 (Actually I’ve been searching out on google on what seems to be the appropriate blog and it happens to be some questions like this so please please, I am not a professional blogger Steven, Okay I have no idea why am I explaining myself)

One thing that I regret the most, hmmmm. Let me think. Lol. Okay, it was the time when my ex-boyfriend cheated on me. Yup, that piece of shit had left a permanent scar on my very innocent precious heart.

Why do I regret it? So here’s how it goes. He was my first boyfriend ever. I never say this to anyone before but I actually hated guys. Not that I hate them because they don't have vaginas but because I find them tiring and like always wanna fight or like maniacs (exception to the guys in my family of course) I am really avoiding myself to be alone with group of guys, I don't know I’m scared of them but that was during my elementary years. On 6th grade, I had this puppy love thing to a boy, yeah, We became a thing for like 11 days and that 11th day I broke up with him because I felt disgusted. Yup. Disgusting. Hahahaha he is fucking cheesy and keeps calling me names like baby or what like ew no, He became my boyfriend because of peer pressure, all my friends that time had their boyfriend and why can’t I? So yeah he texted me if I can be his girl and I just said yes. HAHAHAHA SHIT. Anyway, This is not about him, this is about my first REAL boyfriend.

I don't know how to start. Shiz. Well uhh….. Okay, I met him when I was 4th yr hs, and to cutshort, we became a thing, everything went well, chatting, video chat, playing games, online stuff and the likes but not until I reached college. We were 7 months that time, I was really into achieving the DL in our school (i ain't smart nope) so I was kinda busy and kinda off on our relationship and really hooked on my studies, he said he understands, but that didn't last. After 2 months he started complaining about how I chose to go straight to the computer shop after a long day in school than to go home and chat him. And my reason was “baby it’s just my way of getting rid of the stress” and he said isnt he enough? And I feel really guilty on that but man, I am a gamer , Already a gamer right before I met him. That’s what I do but of course, for him, I stopped doing that. One reason? I loved him. So yeah that’s what I do, went straight to my house, talking to him while studying, sometimes he complained about how slow I replied to so I set a time for him and a time for my school works. Like 7 pm to 10 for him and 10 on wards for my school duties. But fuck that was really exhausting, sometimes I just cried at night because my brain is not functioning well due to lack of sleep so it is useless in the morning. One day I was so busy with my math class and something happened, we fought. I don't know but I snapped at him, I said okay let’s just end this then. And with that, we broke up.

I regret that I said that later on, I was just so tired and still adjusting to my college life because I wasn't active when I was in high school so I find it hard to cope with it and my course man, God. So yeah I was waiting for him to chat me like he used to every time we broke up but that time, I received nothing. So I chatted him first and had a conversation with him but he seemed uninterested and I was hurt on the way he acted so I just asked him directly to the point, can we still fix this? And he said “I’m sorry I'm confused” and I’m like why? Do you like somebody else now? He said no. And I said okay, I’ll respect your decision, I can wait :) and with that he seen me. I cried a lot that night. Like a lot because fuck I can feel how my heart cracks. And with that I threw my school life away, I started to slack again and be active on our game.

One day, his friends talked to me, they told me everything they saw, they said that my boyfriend was always waiting for that one girl to go online, sometimes he even asked them if she was online so he’ll come online too. They said that they were always together hanging out and to be honest, I didn’t believe them. I don’t wanna believe them.

So I talked to him, he never chatted me since then but I have to know the truth right?, so I asked him, you know what he told me? He said I am such a cheap girl because I easily believed on what other people say, and I told him wow they are your friends they are not just other people, he seen me. And he never ever talked to me again, It took all the guts in me to actually call his number but he didn’t answer it, he would always hung up, so I don’t know what to believe anymore, I started blaming myself. I blamed myself for not having much time for him. I developed an anxiety disorder and I was really then depressed big time. Because I lost him, I lost the guy I loved. I can still remember the most hurtful thing that he told me, "Why can't you just move on and leave me the fuck alone!" NSTP class. 10:51 am. Hahahahaha

Moving on from him was way harder than I expected, sometimes I found myself crying during class hours or while inside a vehicle on the way to school, I always cry every morning even before I went to school. I was like a walking dead person, I never went to my class anymore, I stayed on a computer shop every single damn day just so I can still feel that I’m alive. That is how badly my first heartbreak was, a few months later I had improved myself again, not crying anymore, not stalking him anymore and well I was talking to some other guy. So yeah, after 3 months, me and my ex boyfriend met again but this time on a group video chat, I was talking to **** that time so I didn’t pay much attention to them and I didn’t expect that he'll get jealous and yeah to cut it short , he once again came back to my peaceful life, I never mention earlier that within that 3 months of our break up he kept on appearing and disappearing on my life so I find it hard on how to react because what now? He’s just gonna leave again, He’ll hurt me again, right? But he said he already mean it now. He said he’ll never leave me anymore, And stupid me after 2 days, just only 2 days steven, we’re back again together. I was so happy, it was beyond happiness. All along I was waiting for him to come back, I was waiting for him patiently. But that happiness also didn’t last. After I opened his FB account, I don’t wanna believed it but I saw it, with my very own eyes, It was confirmed. He really cheated on me.

For all those times that I became the bitch in the eyes of his friends, he became the victim and I was the bad guy because I was accusing him, but fuck I was right all along. I was right. And here’s how my most regretful thing that I ever did with my life, I didn’t break up with him. I stayed, I was hurt so bad but then I was scared to lose him, I cant lose him again, I just can't. So within that exact day that I confirmed he cheated on me, was the day that I told him I’ll accept it, that it was okay, it was all in the past now, I forgive you. But no, every single night I lied to him, every goddamn night I said I’ll go sleep first but I don’t really sleep, I can’t sleep, I’ll just spend the rest of the night crying, crying till I fell asleep thinking why I wasn’t enough, why did I do wrong, am I ugly, is she that great, I had spent every day blaming myself before because I thought it was all my fault but then those people were right all along, his friends were right, and again those thoughts bugged me forever. I never had the chance to move on from that, Every time I brought that issue, he’ll get mad and say if you love me you really have to accept those, HAHAHAHAHAHA GODDAMN IT. WHAT AN ASSHOLE.

Sorry Steven, I know it wasn’t quite interesting but seriously that’s the thing that I regret the most, The moment I accepted his sin was the moment I lost my respect to myself, I lost my worth, I lost myself, I can't even remember who the hell I am, I became the girl who has a lot of trust issues and also that is the reason why my love for him faded, I felt nothing but numbness. BUT it’s okay I am okay now, I’m such a drama queen, am I? I have to end this here loves.

That’s why you guys out there, if ever your partner cheated on you, please, just please give yourself some time to think, you deserve a time for yourself, a space, always remember that if you act like you’re strong enough to handle such a monstrous disaster, you’ll end up like me. Just don’t. The one who broke you can never ever fix you, I promise you that.

HAHAHAHAHAH I GTG SORRRY ANYWAY GOODNIGHT STEVEN, talk to you on my next blog 🙃 I am so sleeppyy

Alesana.

[asemgirlpower]

Does a girl gamer even exist? Can girls even be geeks? Short answer: Hell Yeah

Comic book stores. Chemistry labs. Deep in the guts of computer programming code. Safe to assume that these are the domains of geeky, nerdy boys – the type who failed gym class but comes back their 20th reunion swimming in the cash from their tech startup.

The word geek comes from the Dutch word gek, meaning ‘mad or silly’ and the Germanic origin geck meaning ‘fool.’ Today’s dictionary defines geek as “ a peculiar person, especially one who is perceived to be overly intellectual, unfashionable, or socially awkward.”

What does it even mean to be a real geek? If you had asked the eighteen-year-old me, NEVER would I have admitted I was a geek. To me, back then, a geek was a social outcast with no hope of getting laid, and dying alone without any friends. Well shit, I can tell you right now, I was very wrong. To me, being a geek means being perpetually passionate about science fiction, high fantasy action, comic books, technology, science, etc. I get the same rush towards scientists and astronauts that some do towards movie stars and rock stars. Today, I am proud to consider myself a geek. I spend countless hours reading textbooks, researching my own scientific projects, and loving any science fiction I can get my hands on.

Sadly, society is still along track with eighteen-year-old me. The geek culture is still perceived as the holy ground for white men. The exclusion of women of a key factor to what gives some geeks their credibility. These men have been hiding behind screens, talking shit through headsets, and never could a woman ever do something like that. No no, in the geek culture, women are only to be seen as “damsels in distress” there to be saved by our knight in shining armor. Chris Kulwe, a lifetime gamer and part time NFL player, says there is a herd of people who feel that their identity as “gamers” is being taken away, and they are

“desperately protecting the last shreds of ‘core gaming’ in their unironically horrible Liveblog journals filled with patently obvious white privilege and poorly disguised misogyny”

The men in this culture have threatened women’s lives, have exposed their entire lives on the internet, and for what? Because they think that allowing these girls in their “all boys club” will take away from the exclusivity? I think it’s because their selfish, and their lack of basic human nature to treat all people with respect and kindness you expect in return. They will do whatever it takes to maintain the sliver of hegemonic masculinity they still have left within their culture.

Women and girls are taught since birth that we will be judged no matter what; about everything we do, say, wear, or see. Those lessons may not have been taught in so many words, but they still exists all the same. This behavior tends to be even worse among women in stereotypically male-dominated cultures, like geeks. We build up our cred by constantly putting others down, proclaim we aren’t “like the other girls” (as though that’s an accomplishment) and argue what makes us “real” gamers and geeks instead of the dreaded “fake geek girl.” Unfortunately, there’s no amount of measurable credibility, no ratio of clothing to skin we must maintain to unlock the Geek Girl Achievement.

So to those who say the death of the “gamer” is among us, I say “LET US IN!!!”

The (mostly) straight, white, male people police geek culture using concepts like “geek cred” (having an impossibly detailed knowledge of a fandom’s minutia), claims that girls are thin-skinned princesses who can’t handle the culture, and implications that female nerds are either only tagging along with their boyfriends or trying to sleep their way to success. What’s ironic about all this is that while television, film, video games, the comic books industry continues to mostly cater to presumed male audiences—across media, female creators and storylines with women at their center are the exception to the rule—women make up at least half of people who spend money on geeky media and events. “What made me want to get into comics was how stupid the women were and how much I wanted to fix it,” said Barbara Randall Kesel, a writer and editor who has worked with DC and Marvel Comics.

Kesel is an example of the exception. She saw something wrong with the culture, and she wanted to do something about it. Similar to Oni Hartstein, a webcomic creator, a fan conventional founder and operator, and a haunted house aficionado. Her five-year-old Intervention: The Premier Showcase of Online Creativity is a convention’s convention and an incubator for DIY, indie, and technology artists. She also founded (Re)Generation Who: The Doctor Who Convention for Every Generation. She says being a geek means you are not necessarily in what people call the mainstream 

“You’re more on the outside, but then you find other people like yourself. You find people who understand your wavelength, understand your love for books, your love for haunted houses and immersive theater, your love for stuff that requires a little more thought”

What a role model! Someone who isn’t afraid to be herself, someone who has broken through various glass ceilings. As an exception to the “all boys club” of the geek world, I think we all deserve more people to look up to. Now, I’m not talking about the scantly clothed heroines that fill the pages of the comic books created by men, for me. I want real people, real nerds to look up to. Leah Jane agrees, when saying:

Wouldn’t a more compelling, interesting, and challenging comparison for celebrating an alternative to mainstream role models for girls have been real-life women who are involved in geek culture? How about Lauren Faust, creator of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic? Or Lindsay Ellis, the Nostalgia Chick? Rebecca Watson, from Skepchick? Jane Goodall, the world-famous Primatologist? Dr. Alice Roberts, from Digging for Britain? Lisa Randall, the Harvard Physicist? Kate Beaton, the brilliant comic artist? Or Mayim Bialik, the actress turned neuroscientist turned actress?

So I don’t think we should be admirable of the comic book action heroines, with the physically impossible contortions of the female body. I think the girls aspiring to be accepted into the geek culture should repress the stereotypes that men force on us, whether it through the imaginary Aeryn Sun from Farscape, Zoe Alleyne Washburne from Firefly, or Susan Ivanova from Babylon 5, Jadzia Dax from Star Trek: Deep Space 9, or Samantha Carter from Stargate, all women are sexualized for pop culture.

Find the real women nerds, let your passion grow. We need to accept each other for who we are, regardless of how we came upon our fandoms or how revealing our cosplays are. None of us have any right to judge the legitimacy of anyone else’s level of geek. Be positive and focus on your goals no matter what. Do what you love as much as is physically possible, that’s what is going to be the engine that powers you throughout whatever may come.