#my alarm will go off in 6 hours
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I am not having a good time.
#my alarm will go off in 6 hours#i want to cry#and scream#and be held#but i also never want to be touched again#i feel so disgusting#idk what to do
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Atleast i just changes the bedsheets to the ones that make me really happy ever time i see them
I am such a sucker for celestial themes
#yey#but now i sleep#its back to work for me tomorrow morning and my first alarm is going off in 6 hours#ugh
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skshdhwydiw6fis7du
#my body is. so tired#got off work at 10pm bc we had to clean and it took 2 hours#i have to go get a shot tomorrow morning (i wanna get in the habit of doing it on mondays) and i was asked if i could#come into work again tomorrow for a 6 hour shift bc im still in training and i need to get more shit done#im gonna crash as soon as my head hits the pillow lmao#but need to set an alarm#amber's shit you can ignore
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i may or may not have lied about starting banana fish today
#funny story...#i pulled an all nighter#and then my phone was gonna die so i slept at 8 am#and then was woken up by the smell of smoke and fire alarm going off at 12 pm#somehow stayed up for an hour or teo#and then woke up at 6 pm...#it's not my fault trust
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So anyways my plan for the next two months is to kickass at work while I get another job and then leave their asses.
#I'm so mad about this#I've been at this company for 6 years and for the most part everyone I've worked with has been great#Easy to get along with. Smart. Caring.#I've had some not so great bosses and every once in a while I've encountered problem people#But repeatedly one person (not in my vertical but a key person in my org)#Has repeatedly made me feel like shit. Even if she claims to mean well or whatever#I absolutely never feel like we're ok the same team. It always feels like it's her team or death#Which is not an environment I thrive in#And then her boss (who is also my bosses boss) either feeds into that or exacerbates it#I wish I had had the words during our engagement survey because I'm not the only one who feels this way#So many people go into a meeting with her expecting to talk about one thing and instead she asks for something else entirely#It consistently feels like she has no trust in her team and she does not want to foster a culture of 'we're in the same team'#She is fostering a culture of 'im the boss so I'll dictate exactly what I want and I am free to change it at any time'#So. Anyways. If you know of companies hiring in their product or portfolio space hit me up.#I spent 10 hours trying not to cry at work today and then had three separate little cries#Going to going with my boss a little about taking a week off soon#He's going to be alarmed and concerned but like. He should be.#(my boss is generally great my only complaint is that he hasn't figure out how to work with his boss yet so that's compounding my issues.#But that is not all on him. And he has never once made me feel like we're not on the same team)#Blah blah ok. Tomorrow I work and then do the life shit I didn't do today#The day after that I do a second pass at my resume#And use a working block at work to figure out what I want (and sketch out my teams pain points and potential solutions)
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ヽ(≧□≦)ノ
#ok cant sleep#keep crying#eyes hurt#why didnt meletonin work like it does every night#alarm going off in 6 hours#not enough sleep#dont feel tired at all#just anxious#so so so anxious#why is this feeling happening#i canceled plans with the guy earlier because anxiety was just not letting me leave my apartment#i got fully ready to go out and just couldnt do it#ngl i think a part of it is not having glasses#like there are much bigger fish to fry but i kind of feel like having my glasses is a little tiny piece of armor#((not to mention its super disorienting when everything is blurry))#((do you know how many times i poked myself in the face today because i kept trying to adjust my glasses that werent there))#i hate having my face exposed#its too real#tbh i would wear sunglasses 24/7 if it was normal#then people wouldnt give me shit all the damn time about eye contact#ppl call eyes the window to the soul then call ME weird for not wanting to look into them#sorry the WINDOWS to your SOUL are a little much for me#FUCK I NEED TO SLEEP#alarm in 5 hours and 55 mins
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Guys I dont think 7 hours of sleep is actually the right amount for me.
#this is the first day in maybe a month or 2 i didnt set an alarm for myself to wake up at a reasonable time#and i slept extremely peacefully from 11 to 11 thats 12 hours of sleep i also feel good??? like not exhausted from oversleep???#i do work 6 days a week... but like that could be worse i could not have a day off at all and i need the money#and i refuse to go to bed early theres already so little time in the day i cant waste it on sleep ughhg#crossing my fingers that my new job works out but thats also gonna mess with my sleep bad for a good while#body why are u so needy!!! 10 hours of sleep is unreasonable!!! i get it that 5-6 is too little#but 7-8 should be normal we should be fine what is up girl!!?
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binniee🥰🥰🥰
#오랜만에 빈어스!!!!#so funny bc i totally messed up the time difference i had an alarm set for 6 instead of 5 💀😭#and like i woke up in the middle of the night around 4:50 or smth and was like oh i still have an hour before binnie comes on should i sleep#and then a few minutes later my notifs go off abt his live and im like *pikachu_meme.jpeg*#so nice seeing him 🥰🥰#wish i understood more hahaa#but i caught that he said he has a solo stage 👀 and they'll also be doing stages of releases when binseong were enlisted ? 👀#he also said he misses jaeyoon...roomies for life 🥺🥲#obvi he said more; the live was over an hour but i can't remember what else i could make out...#I'm gonna go back to sleep in a bit 😂#youngbin#caps n stuff
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There’s this thing also that happens in your late 20s where you discover that 7am isn’t actually that early. In fact if you sleep in until 8 you wonder what happened
#people are like ‘omg i can’t believe you go to bed before 11 you’re so disciplined’ first off i don’t always manage it#(case in point: it’s 10:28pm and i’m downstairs and on my fucking phone)#but also i literally have to go to bed early because my body is waking me up at 6. it’s going to happen and i might as well accept it#like i’m not going back to sleep. i can’t trick my brain into thinking it’s still nighttime. my brain Knows#where was this when i had to wake up to catch the school bus. where was this when i was commuting to uni and had to drive for an hour to get#to a 9am class???#i set an alarm and my body is like ‘we can outdo the fucking alarm’ and wakes me up exactly 7 minutes before it. routinely#i have work tomorrow at 10:30. there’s no point setting an alarm. i WILL be awake 3+ hours before that#i will say i’m a lot slower at getting ready. i used to be able to get ready for school in like. 10 minutes. that was bathroom;#getting dressed; breakfast & packing my bag. now i take like. 2 hours#in fairness a lot of that is mental preparation. some is playfighting mabel and some is just complaining#tl;dr i’m a morning person now. rip#personal
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they are currently testing in-unit fire alarm systems in my building and I have to assume based on what i am experiencing that the way they are doing it is by going to each individual unit on all 22 floors and setting off the building-wide alarm for every single one
#I got home over an hour ago and it's been going off every 30 seconds or so for 1 second#and then it's off for another 30 seconds#i am going insane it's so loud#but i can't leave because i'm waiting for a delivery that might be here as late as 4pm#and i threw out the notice because i didn't think i'd be here so i don't even know when it will stop#just uh#just throw me off the balcony i guess#you can literally hear the pause between alarms when they are#presumably#going up to the next floor#there are 6 apartments on each floor plus more on the first floor#wait it's gone quiet#oh my god i can't get my hopes up#is it over???#oh my god i think it's over#ok post cancelled i think it's done
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i’m gonna sleep now ! i am vvvv sleepy ! smooching u all tho . i hope u all have the best day / nite n gets loads of rest ( ◠·◠)ა <3 !
#ʚ・◞📎 — em entry.#just know i’m dreaming about my blorbos !#snifle i don’t wanna get up 4 work 2moro my alarm will go off in 6 hours . i’m not ready </3
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The problem with having an irregular work schedule is that I need alarms to remind me to do stuff and I can't just set alarms on repeat and forget about them if what I'm doing each week keeps changing
#ace is a mess#this may seem unrelated but i used to have meal alarms set which i turned off cus they go off during work and now im realising i forgot#lunch and my snacks because im literally in capable of noticing basic needs when focused which wouldnt have happened if i could keep my#alarms set still!! like i have a night alarm thats only purpose is to help me keep track of time passing so i go to sleep eventually#instead of at 3am+ after thinking huh its been a little while only for it to transpire that a while was 6 hours#i should not be allowed to be an adult im incapable of functioning
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I was just in such a deep sleep after my first alarm, I woke up with my phone in my hand pressing random buttons because in my dream I was doing something on my phone... I hope those notifications weren't important
#woes of emily#normally i don't properly fall asleep when my snooze alarms go off#but I'm so tired today:(#which makes sense. because I've had about 6 hours sleep#idk if it's still a think because i dont really use fb or twitter#but you used to he able to interact with posts from notifications#like - like them or retweet or whatever so. er. i hope i haven't done anything like that#i don't think there's a way to know
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i’ve been up since 4:30 and i keep slowly getting ready and then getting back in bed like “are you sure body, are you sure you want to be awake at this ungodly hour instead of sleeping?”
#It’s 6:30 and my body keeps choosing pain so no sleep#but I had one half of a lush shower bomb left so I smell really good now#and I’ve eaten and gotten dressed#and I still have forty five minutes before my alarm#todays gonna be a loooong day tho#my alarm goes off 45 minutes to an hour before I meet my friend for breakfast#and then I have two one hour classes#and then a lunch break and then my three hour theatre building shit class#and THEN I’m done (except for having to go grocery shopping cause I’m out of food and HOMEWORK)#life of a boomerang
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I've got demons running round in my head And they feed on insecurities I have Won't you lay your healing hands on my chest? Let your ritual clean
#今日の気分は#for once NOT a song I woke up with stuck in my head#because this morning I was awoken by the dulcet tones of one of my neighbors' fire alarms going off for 15+ hours#(it started shortly before I went to bed and I kept waking up to it every hour or so)#(but at like 6 am I had a dream that my apartment was on fire and I had to save my research materials before they caught on fire)#(and I woke up from that and was like okay. I'm done. no more attempts at sleeping until this alarm situation gets fixed)#(and then left a vaguely unhinged maintenance request)#but that's neither here nor there#anyway. this was picked because I started listening to all the music I saved on Spotify as I do every year#and got through all of it (in a surprisingly short time--I apparently didn't find much new music this year)#and then kept listening to that playlist. but then Spotify did that glitch where it suddenly jumps you WAY down on the playlist#and I should note. I do not use their music saving system. instead I have a playlist called Starred which I save all my music to#yes I am aware that this is slightly unhinged. anyway. moving on#so it teleported me back to like. early 2018/late 2017? several days ago? and I have just been listening backward in time since then#I think I saved this one in uhhhh 2016? or maybe early 2017.#anyway. I hear the spirit possession song and it's the 今日の気分は. that's just the rules#music#Bastille
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i gotta stop getting comfy in bed if i don’t wanna go to sleep yet bc i end up passing out wayyyy before i should asdfg
#i don’t think i even made it to 8 o’clock bc i have an alarm to remind me to do my fafsa and#i don’t remember that even going off oh jeez#i better be super well rested when i wake up in 6 hours or i’m throwing my body in jail thanks#well i hope y’all have lovely nights/days!! i’ll send the asks i owe when i wake up 💜#get ready to ramble | ooc#tbd
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