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emilys-bangs · 2 months ago

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malleable | e.p

Tags: established relationship, fluff, mom!emily, no use of yn, reader isn't really present in this fic, halloween

Summary: Emily hates Halloween (but when her daughter asks her to dress up with her, she can't refuse).

Word count: 2.1k

If there’s anything Emily’s daughter is, it’s obsessed with Tangled. The movie plays at least three times a week on your living room TV; you and Emily have memorized the dialogue somewhere around three months ago. Now you can easily recite it in your sleep, close your eyes and clearly picture Rapunzel and Eugene’s next moves.

Despite that, your daughter still remains infatuated. Which is why Emily is only briefly surprised when Eloise drops her hand with a gasp and takes off running to the end of the costume aisle, colorful lights bursting along her sneakers as she runs to the purple dress packaged beneath a picture of the princess.

“This one!”

Emily smothers her smile as Eloise rises on the very tips of her tiptoes, her fingers wriggling impatiently as she tries to reach the costume. She falls a few inches short, and her displeasure is immediately known in the twist of her lips.

“Mommy.” She whines at her mother’s slow approach.

“Hmm,” Emily hums. ��How many times have we said not to run off, Eloise? You know you can’t do that when we’re outside.” She sweeps messy bangs away from Eloise’s eyes—the exact same shade as her own.

“Sorry. Can I have it? Please?” She settles back on the soles of her feet and hugs Emily’s legs. “Please, please, Mommy.” Her mouth curls into a pleading pout.

The long repeated reprimand fades into the background. Your daughter is usually good at following it, almost always content with holding either your hand or Emily’s, so she smiles softly and lets it go this once.

“How about we see it first, yeah sweetheart?” One of her hands goes to Eloise’s back as she grabs the costume off the shelf. Shades of purple wink up at her through the clear plastic, peeking out from beneath Rapunzel’s picture and the picture of the little girl displaying it. “Cute,” she says, absently combing her fingers through Eloise’s hair.

“Wanna see.”

Emily bends over to get closer to Eloise, letting her take the costume from her hands. “What do you think?” She murmurs, brushing her daughter’s bangs over the soft arch of her eyebrows. “Do you like it?”

“Yes!” Eloise gasps.

The palpable excitement in her voice makes the garish costume store a little more bearable. Emily smiles as she adjusts the hem of Eloise’s sweater down her stomach, having risen up in her strenuous pursuit of the costume. “Are you sure that’s the one you want? We haven’t seen many others.”

“Wanna be Rapunzel.” Eloise says firmly, nodding to herself as she hugs the dress to her chest.

“Alright, well if you’re sure,” Emily laughs, not in the least bit surprised at her five-year-old’s resoluteness. It’s something she’d gotten directly from her; Emily’s heart only expands at seeing roots of herself grow in her daughter.

“I’m sure.” Eloise drags out the word, stretching it out so it sounds like duh.

“Okay. Let me see if that’s your size.” Emily holds out her hand. With great reluctance, Eloise hands her the costume. Emily huffs out an amused laugh as she straightens, distantly wondering where her daughter got such an intense love for Halloween from. You’re mostly indifferent, and she hates it with more passion than it deserves. But your little gremlin has been talking nonstop about her costume for the past week, and after a brief debate—which Emily lost—you finally found the time to take her.

Though Emily feels two little arms wrap around her thigh, she places a hand on Eloise’s head for extra measure. Small fingers tickle her through her jeans as she rifles through the costumes, humming until she finds the proper size.

“Here it is. I think that’s about it—”

“I’m gonna be Rapunzel and you’re Mother Gospel!” Eloise announces as she steals the costume from Emily’s hands. Emily’s brows furrow.

“Gothel.”

“Garthel.”

Every time.

Emily lets it go. Instead she focuses on the more pressing issue her daughter presented. “You want me to be your evil Mommy?” She frowns at Eloise, the pout of her lips exaggerated.

Eloise is unfazed. “You’re not my evil Mommy, you’re ’punzle’s evil Mommy.” She says sagely. The circles of her eyes are wide, a shine to them that almost always ensures she’s going to get what she wants. “And I’m Rapunzel so you have to be her Mommy.” She reasons.

Emily swallows a grimace at the hopeful tone in her voice. Her distaste for Halloween peeks through her love for her daughter, the two conflicting sides clashing together as she looks down at the five-year-old expectantly tilting her chin up.

“Honey, I don’t really like wearing costumes for Halloween.” Emily says, slowly, as if it’ll soften the blow.

Eloise frowns. “Why?”

“Uhh...” It’s not the easiest thing to explain to her toddler that she despises the holiday partly because of her inability to unsee masked unsubs everywhere. But really a huge part of it Emily doesn’t understand herself; the unrestrained chaos of it, the headache of coming up with a costume each year, and—in more recent years—swapping out the candy after her daughter has passed out. It’s more hassle than it deserves, and Emily simply doesn’t have the patience for it.

“I don’t know.” She raises her shoulders in a jerky shrug. Her words seem extra lame when Eloise tilts her head, confused. “I’m not a fan, I guess.”

“But it’s Halloween.” She whines.

“I know, bug. But you know who’d match really well with you? Your—”

“Want you to be Mother Gospel.” Eloise grumbles, interrupting before Emily can throw the role on you—like she did last year. Her eyes turn stormy dark as the disappointment settles, etching itself in delicate frown lines across her young face. The happiness of acquiring her costume dissolves into a cloud, one that starts growing gray above her head, gathering with rain that reflects in Eloise’s eyes.

Emily’s stomach turns with guilt.

“Ellie…” She chews on her lip, feeling herself crumble beneath her daughter’s gaze. But then her eyes flit to the costumes around them and her nose wrinkles, almost against her will. “We’ll talk about it at home, okay? Let’s just get your costume now, it’s almost lunch time.”

Eloise sulks. She thrusts her arms out, a frown digging between her brows. “Mommy up.” She demands, almost as if it’s punishment.

Emily finds herself smiling. “Yes, my liege.” She says playfully, lightening her tone and hoping to pull a similar smile from her daughter as she lifts her up into her arms. Emily stifles a grunt as she heaves Eloise up against her chest, a dull strain pulling the muscles of her arms taut as she secures her little girl to her body, where she always used to lay as an infant. Admittedly, Eloise is heavier than she used to be, her rapidly growing body settling more firmly against Emily’s side. But she knows these days are starting to slip from her fingers, the sand draining to the other end of the glass, so Emily grasps each opportunity she can get, regardless of the ache in her back and hip.

Eloise still doesn’t smile back, so Emily kisses her cheek, hoping to find a dimple. “You know, you could do with being Mother Gothel yourself.” She murmurs as Eloise settles against her, the costume halfway squished between their bodies.

“She’s not a princess,” Eloise sighs heavily as she lays her head on her shoulder.

Which is definitely her only fault.

“How could I have forgotten,” Emily says, absently sweeping another kiss over Eloise’s forehead. “She’s not a princess. Does this come with a crown?” She tries to look down at the costume.

“Nu-uh.”

“Well, that won’t do. Our princess needs a crown, doesn’t she?”

“A purple crown.” Eloise agrees.

“A purple crown,” Emily parrots. She hoists Eloise higher on her hip, forcing her eyes away from the sweet relief of the cashier and to the endless shelves of accessories. She swallows down a deep sigh and tries to think of her daughter’s happiness. “Let’s browse their selection, shall we?”

___

“It’s the best costume in the world!” Eloise gushes, her eyes bright with excitement. She trips over the word costume, switching the s and t, which strikes Emily as a little odd for a girl who can effortlessly pronounce Rapunzel.

She laughs as she fixes the crown on Eloise’s head, silently hoping she never grows out of her endearing quirks. “It is pretty cool. Fine choice, m’lady.” She grabs Eloise’s hand and twirls her around in front of the mirror, smiling when the little girl giggles at the flare of her dress.

They spin until Eloise grows dizzy, tumbling into her mother, so Emily gently sits her down on the carpeted floor of her room. Her cheeks are flushed, the deep brown of her eyes glittering with glee. Once again her tiara tilts, slipping on her head.

“Your crown is lopsided, princess,” Emily murmurs, smiling as she fixes it. “Careful, it’s gotta be on straight.”

Eloise giggles, the sound breathless and bright as she places her hands on Emily’s knees, scrunching the fabric of her sweatpants. “Can we put the flowers in my hair?” She asks, tilting her head up to meet Emily’s eyes. The crown jostles further.

Emily hums and leaves it, finding the task futile. “Yeah, that would be a nice touch,” she taps the tip of her finger on Eloise’s nose, “maybe we can have some daises and—”

“And your hair curly!”

“Mine?” Emily’s brows lift. “Why? I think it looks pretty like this, don’t you?” She shakes out her—admittedly flat—hair.

Eloise shakes her head no. Her eyes narrow critically; she suddenly looks so much like you that Emily’s heart warms, a more than familiar desire to take her daughter into her arms and pepper her face with kisses floating through her veins.

“Y’cant be Mother Garthel without curly hair.” Eloise says.

The feeling dims.

“Eloise,” Emily sighs. “Mon chou, Mommy doesn’t wanna dress up.” She shrugs meekly.

“Please? Please, please, please, Mommy. Henry’s Mommy is gonna wear a costume. And Jack’s Daddy.” Eloise’s eyes grow wider as she crawls into Emily’s lap. Emily’s arms automatically wrap around her, the walls of her resolve crumbling as Eloise burrows closer. She can feel her walls tumbling down, a weary reluctance surfacing from beneath the chipped pieces of her hatred for the holiday as Eloise’s small fingers twist into the fabric of her sweater.

Distantly, Emily thinks that she used to be stronger than this. Her will was iron clad, her mind—once made up—impossible to budge. She’s still like this, you’d argue, only she’s incapable of showing that front to her daughter. She’s putty in Eloise’s hands, bendable and soft and completely, embarrassingly pliant. Which is inconvenient.

Still, Emily gently reminds her daughter of last year’s Halloween. The effort is half hearted at this point, the image of you and Eloise in your matching costumes fuzzy even in her own mind. When Eloise whines quietly, a sulk dragging her mouth down, it tips her over the edge.

“Want it to be you.” She says, her bottom lip starting to quiver.

Which is how Emily finds herself dressed in a red velvet dress on the 31st of October, her hair extravagantly curled and her hand held in Eloise’s. Her other arm is around your waist, her fingers absently rubbing the soft warmth of your costume.

“Thought you said you weren’t dressing up.” JJ’s brows lift, an amused glint shining in her eyes. You’re all standing on her porch, waiting for Henry to come out of the bathroom to take the kids trick or treating.

“The princess demanded it,” Emily says. Try as she might to sound annoyed, she can’t, because Eloise is beaming up at her, a wide grin on her face that displays all of her teeth. Emily smiles back, carving a dimple in her cheek that’s identical to the one in her daughter’s.

“Rapunzel can’t go as Rapunzel without Mother Gothel, right?” She winks. Eloise giggles delightedly, giving Emily a firm nod as she leans into her side.

Even with Jack next to her—dressed as Batman, with Hotch as Robin—she doesn’t let go of Emily’s hand. Her fingers are small and chilly, leeching warmth from the cocoon of her mother’s palm. The small gesture makes Emily’s heart squeeze, her body flood with warmth, and this miniscule pocket of mundanity makes Halloween well worth it.

“And what are you mean to be?” Hotch frowns, the edges of it soft and playful as he directs the question to you.

Emily turns, smothering a laugh at your defeated expression. The pale green of your onesie stands out against the setting sky, the fading rays of the sun illuminating the frog eyes on your fuzzy hood.

You sigh, low and resigned and somehow still overflowing with love.

“I’m the chameleon.”

taglist: @suckerforcate @sickoherd @lextism @catssluvr @i-lovefandom @haiklya @justhereforthosefics @storiesofsvu@ashluvscaterina @basicallyvivi

#emily prentiss #emily prentiss x reader #emily prentiss x you #emily prentiss x y/n #emily prentiss fanfic #emily prentiss fic #emily prentiss fics #emily prentiss fanfiction #emily prentiss fluff #emily prentiss imagine #emily prentiss drabble #emily prentiss blurb #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fanfic #mom!emily #momily #fic #divider by saradika

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weepynymph · 7 months ago

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Penelope’s window

Obviously the Featherington’s drawing room window looking out across the square to the Bridgerton’s house is a hugely significant part of this season (which is so fantastic because it’s been planted for two season straight now that’s she’s constantly sitting there - I love it!) but what about Pen’s bedroom window?

On first watch I automatically assumed during the scenes where she’s sat at her bedroom window all day after her and Colin’s lessons are revealed to the ton that she was, as usual, looking out at the Bridgerton’s house. Especially because we immediately cut from this image to Colin looking out of HIS drawing room window towards the Featherington’s house. But then on second watch it struck me that her bedroom doesn’t look out over the square, its on the opposite side of the house, overlooking the gardens.

The best evidence I have for this is 2x08 where its looks as though Pen is watching the fireworks in her bedroom.

And during the scene in 3x02 from what I can see it’s mostly trees out there which doesn’t match up to the square at all so it’s got to be the back of the house.

So when she withdraws from society and hides in her room, it’s not the Bridgerton’s house she’s staring out at all day - it’s the garden. It’s the place where they made this disastrous plan, and the place where she heard Colin say he’d never court her.

Later that night when Colin meets her in the garden (God the symmetry is so GOOD) she describes herself as ‘a sad, stupid girl who believed she might possibly have a chance of love’ and I can’t help but be reminded of how crushed she was at the end of last season when she believed that things might finally be happening with Colin only to hear him completely reject the idea of ever courting her.

I’d be willing to bet that she spent a good portion of that day in 3x02 staring out at the garden thinking about that night and punishing herself for having let herself hope, for having ‘brought this on herself’ again.

For Penelope, the drawing room window represents the hope that she might someday be with Colin. When she says to Debling in 3x04 she’s ‘grown tired’ of the view I think she means she’s grown tired of hoping for something that will never happen.

Whereas her bedroom window, I think, has come to represent the destruction of that hope (at least at this stage in her story). The only times we see her looking out of it are 2x08, and here in 3x02: moments when all hope is lost for her, not just in terms of being with Colin, but of finding love at all. Portia makes it pretty clear in this scene that the idea of Pen making a match is unrealistic, one could say, laughable.

And then where does Colin bribe Rae to bring Pen so they can have a moment alone? Not the front of the house or that little side entrance we see her meet Eloise at in season one (which would probably be more discreet to be honest), but the garden.

Whistledown’s narration is significant here too, she says: ‘a small taste of the light can lead to that most dangerous of emotions. Hope. And once hope is lost, a lady may become reckless.’ They are literally standing in the place where hope was lost, the place where he broke her heart last season, and the whole script is about to get flipped. She thinks this is the end of everything, when really it’s the beginning.

She’s been staring at the garden all day thinking about everything it represents; how she is nearly on the shelf and may die without ever having been kissed, how Colin Bridgerton would never dream of courting her. But it isn't true. Instead, true love is waiting for her down there. Hope is waiting for her down there. She is not going to die tomorrow. She is not going to die without ever having been kissed. Colin Bridgerton WOULD dream of courting her (and is about to in the next episode! In the bloody garden!!!)

This turned into a dissertation but all this to say that this is why Colin Bridgerton needs to climb through that bedroom window in part two and thoroughly make it up to her, thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

#this post was meant to shorter but the dots started dotting and I got carried away #I swear I entered flow state putting this together 😂#bridgerton #polin #colin x penelope #penelope featherington #colin bridgerton #bridgerton meta #polin meta #bridgerton spoilers #bridgerton season 3 #bridgerton season 3 spoilers

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redheadspark · 6 months ago

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i would like for the june prompt to request benedict bridgerton with dialogue #1 and prompt #7

A/N - This is cute for Benedict! Thanks for requesting this, anon!

Regret

Summary - Benedict always spoke from the heart, unless it was about his childhood crush

Warnings - Fluff :)

It started in your childhood.

Your family moved into the estate next to the Bridgerton home, being instantly welcomed by Violet Bridgerton and her plentiful children. It amazed you to see 8 children at your doorstep, Violet at the helm of course, and making sure her children were all well-mannered in their introductions. It was a contrast to your family, you being the only child and rather shy when it came to meeting new people, mostly your parent’s friends and associates.

However, each one of the Bridgerton children was pleased to meet you: Serious and yet kind Anthony, boisterous and playful Benedict, sweet-natured Colin, friendly Daphne, intelligent Eloise, timid Francesca, and playful Gregory and Hyancith. You were envious of them and how they were great siblings together, but they “adopted” you into their world so to speak. You were invited over to play with them several times, thanks to the growing friendship of your parents and the Bridgerton Matriarch.

One Bridgerton latched onto you rather quickly: Benedict.

Whether was his playful nature or his boyish charm, you fell for it all the same when you two would chase each other and read side by side in his parlor. Although you were more of a reader than he was, he never minded reading with you since you were telling him all the good parts in the books that he would like.

“I thought there were pirates in this book!”

“There is, you must wait for the good part, Benedict! Or would you rather read it yourself?”

“No, I prefer your reading it to me! You know the bigger words than me,”

Of course, your parents were trying to raise you into a proper young lady, and yet you would return home from a playdate at the Bridgerton home with mud on your dress and your hair askew. It wasn’t Violet’s fault, you were the one who would sneak off to run around with Benedict or learn how to draw with him too. He becomes your favorite Bridgerton as time goes on from childhood to pre-adolescent.

You both would still read together, though it was mostly you reading out loud to him as he would rest his head in your lap. He loved hearing your voice, vent using different voices for the characters in the book and knowing how to make the action scenes exciting. It was one of your favorite times of the day with him, the pair of you almost tucked up with one another in the parlor. You love this company, his light heartiness when you were stressed and his eye for creativity when he would talk about his art.

When he started drawing with charcoal, you saw a new shift in him, a new spark. He would be hunched over his pad and charcoal stick, etching out nature or something more abstract. You would watch in fascination while he would bring art to life, thinking of him as a genius as his fingers would be strain black and his smile to widen even more. Sure, you would say every single piece of art he drew was amazing and mind-blowing, but it was true. You saw the passion in him and in how he drew the curves,

It was Eloise who first planted the seed inside of Benedict as you left for your home for the day. She leaned over to whisper to Benedict, “I sense you have a crush on our neighbor,”

Benedict was flushed, whipping his head over to his younger sister who smirked at him as he huffed, “What makes you say that? I simply enjoy her company!”

“Yet you would let her read to you for hours on end when you wouldn't let me do the same for more than 5 minutes,” Eloise replied smoothly and with no hesitation, Benedict was quiet for a moment as she raised a brow at him, “I wouldn’t dwell on it too much since it would only bring you a headache,”

Benedict thought back on that conversation every once in a while, thinking back to those smaller moments when he would be next to you. You were a breath of fresh air for him, someone who made him laugh constantly and would take on one of his rants and quirks. It made him feel special to be with you for hours on, on how you would choose to be with him over any of the other Bridgerton Siblings.

But as times passed and you both became teenagers, feelings started to shift on both sides. You were finding him attractive, his dark brown hair and bright eyes, the way he laughed and joked daily, it was all becoming a crush that you could no longer ignore. Even with the impending notion that you were going to come out and go to balls in hopes of finding yourself a suitor, later on, a husband, Benedict never left your mind.

It was just was same with the second eldest Bridgerton. He watched you blossom from a young girl with gangly knees and smudged cheeks into a beautiful young lady... Even as the pair of you still read together or did art together side by side, it was a shifting change of tides for Benedict to see you as more than a friend. He too knew the life of young women coming out and making their singles known in upcoming balls and throughout the season, and the thought of some random stranger of a man taking you away from him sickened him.

He wanted you to be on his arm, to call him your husband, to choose him every day, and beyond that. To him, it was more than friendship and comradery, it was love. He was deeply in love with you and he couldn’t picture his life without you. Then he was petrified, not knowing what to tell you or how to tell you.

But leave it to his older brother Anthony, who was good friends with you, to tell him exactly what he needed to hear:

“You will regret it for the rest of your life if you don’t tell the girl of your dreams how you feel,”

So during the ball, the third ball you’ve been to with your dance card filled to the brim with suitors and hopefuls, Benedict saw you into the crowd. You were dancing with another bachelor, though the look of your face was proper yet uninterested. Benedict felt his stomach drop to the ground from the view of you in your gown, your hair in its curls, and how you looked more radiant than the rest of the ladies in the ballroom. To him, you were still the little girl who laughed and played with him, who encouraged him to grow in his art and told him to never give up on his passion.

You were the little girl who stole his heart.

Finally, as the song was ending and the couple bowed to one another, Benedict made his move. He weaved through the crowd and kept his eyesight on you, seeing you look a bit grimaced as the bachelor was still lingering and attempting some small talk on you. Now he was moving a bit quicker, Benedict thinking that he had a small window to do what he wanted to do. He finally made it to you, giving you a slight bow and seeing the suspicious look on your face as he cleared his throat uncomfortably.

“Apologies for interrupting, but I was told to accompany Ms. L/N to her parents for a serious discussion that cannot wait,” He explained, both yourself and the bachelor looking at each other in confusion. But Benedict held out his arm for you to take, giving you a look to follow his lead. You knew him well enough to take his arm and apologize to the potential suitor, yourself and Benedict walking away and moving out of the main crowd. Benedict would see Anthony out of the corner of his eyes, a massive grin on his face as he was talking to his mother and your hand clutched his arm with uncertainty.

“Follow my lead,” He whispered to you, not wishing to cause a scene with the look you were giving him. You nodded, remaining composed while he finally led the pair of you out to one of the main hallways that led to the garden.

Once you two were out of earshot and out of sight, you whirled around and glared at him, “What has gotten into you?”

“I have something I wish to say to you before it is too late,” He said to you, making you freeze from what he said and now look at him in confusion. Benedict could only remember what his brother told you, how to tell you how he felt about you. Seeing you there in front of him, looking beyond beautiful and radiant for him to only see for a few small moments. He finally felt his heart settle in, and he opened his mouth.

“You have been a big part of my life, ever since we met as children. You see me past my jokes and banter, you see me wishing to be myself and you accept it wholeheartedly. I cannot deny how I feel as though I can fly every time you’re in the room, when you smile at me, simply looking at me.” He explained, his lands slipping into your own as you were listening and watching him with undivided attention with your own heart beating fast and erratically.

“But seeing you tonight being pursued by others, others who do not know the real you and how authentic you are. They see only one side of you when I have seen them all: when you nearly broke your wrist climbing after me as I went up a tree, when I taught you how to paint and sketch, and even when we first met so long ago. We can’t go on like this. Like friends is all we are.” He explained once again, his heart pouring out to you and perhaps he was lost in his own words. Not realizing that you were grinning from ear to ear, that you were scooting a bit closer to him, that you were thinking the same thing too.

“It’s brash for me to tell you this since you probably have others who have already caught your affection and attention, and it must be worse since we have known each other for far too long to cause questions, but I am willing to take on any—“

You silenced him with a passionate kiss.

Benedict’s mind swept away as you were pressing against him and left your lips along his, his own passion for art was now dimmed and replaced with something ten times brighter. At first, he thought that he was demeaning and this was something he made up within his own mind, but then again a dream would not feel this real. Smelling the perfume that was on your skin your mother inside on your wearing, feeling the cooling touch of your dress against his fingertips that seemed so soft like a cloud, and the touch of your lips that would be his new favorite taste that he will never forget in his lifetime.

Yet it also seemed short-lived, you were about to pull away and Benedict inwardly feared that to happen. So he tucked his fingers under your chin to keep you there, kissing you back softly and making you almost whimper from the kiss itself. Benedict felt you smile, making him smile back as you pulled away to peer up at him. He saw the shift in your eyes, how bright they were compared to before, and how they now almost glittered in candlelight.

“It took you long enough to do something, Mr. Bridgerton,” You teased, Benedict’s eyes going wide as you gigged and went on, “I thought I would be a spinster by the time you shared your feelings for me, and I would have said the same about you,”

“You….you had…now hold on!” Benedict questioned as you crossed your arms in front of yourself with slight annoyance, “You too had feelings for me?”

“Of course, I always had feelings for you!” You explained, seeing him cock his head in confusion while you gestured to yourself, “I would have thought you asked sooner to court me!”

“Oh,” He replied, you grinning back at him as he smiled liked a fool hopelessly in love, “Well…and I mean this with the utmost respect…why did you not voice your feelings for me before,”

You sighed, looking down rather sheepishly, “First, I was told it was unlady like. And…I did not know if you mirror those affections as I did,”

Benedict saw the flushness of your cheeks, the inner conflict that you had to say how you felt. He then realized that you both were tip-toeing around one another, willing to stay friends with one another, and having the ultimate fear of being rejected or seen as foolish.

So Benedict tucked his fingers under your chin again to coax you in for another kiss. You took it willingly, leaning into him as the small light of the candles gave an ever-loving glow over the pair of you. Almost a shield from the rest of the ball that seemed to have melted away as you kissed. Feeling nothing but bliss floating between you two as you both were finally living out the dreams.

Neither of you noticed both Eloise and Anthony watching while they were hiding around the corner, both with massive grins on their faces.

The End

June Prompt Session

#benedict bridgerton x y/n #benedict bridgerton x you #benedict bridgerton x reader #benedict x reader #benedict bridgerton #bridgerton fanfiction #bridgerton fandom #bridgerton #fanfiction #writing

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benjinoff13 · 7 months ago

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as promised, my theory about Cressida and her infamous sleeves this season

this is the first time we see Cressida and Eloise together, something about this is immediately really noticeable, Cressida’s sleeves look super normal, apart from having a bit more fringe on her coat and her hair she’s pretty much dressed the same as all the other ladies, now what do we learn about them in this scene? it soon becomes clear that Eloise and Cressida became friends over the summer (i think it was summer?) while both their family’s were at the countryside, now before i get into this more it’s important to explain my theory which is:

Cressida’s parents have her dresses designed with big sleeves to keep others (in this case mostly Eloise) at a physical distance

a bit of backstory about this theory before we get back to that first screencap

i don’t remember where or who but someone said that they thought Cressida has had “an incident” before, meaning her parents have already realized that Cressida maybe is into girls/women in a way, maybe she’s had a friendship that was clearly turning into more or her parents even caught her with someone, ofcourse they would keep this under wraps cause if they didn’t Cressida would never find a husband and the family's reputation would be ruined, but Cressida’s parents (this theory is mostly geared towards her father) are doing everything in their power to prevent it from happening again in order to make sure Cressida gets married asap, they may even want her out of the house because they don’t want her as their daughter anymore

now back to this screencap, Cressida doesn’t have the crazy sleeves yet, her father probably thought that his daughter’s friendship with Eloise was a temporary thing, to the outside world there are no two people that have less in common than Eloise Bridgerton and Cressida Cowper, everybody is surprised by their friendship and so Cressida’s parents must have assumed it was only temporary, just a “summer fling” so to speak, but they're wrong and in this scene Cressida and Eloise are seen in public for the first time, arm in arm, no shame, not caring about the looks and the shock of other people, simply, genuinely, enjoying each other company, to the surprise of the ton and the viewers themselves even

Cressida’s father doesn’t like this one bit, Cressida has only held a friendship this long one other time and he didn’t like the way it ended at all, so he decides he needs to get ahead of it, it needs to be subtle, he can’t keep them away from each other cause Cressida’s impression on the rest on the ton needs to be excellent should she ever find a husband, a friendship could actually work in her favor given it's a respectable one, he can’t tell her to not see Eloise again (we soon learn), so what does he do? he creates a distance, a barrier, something that prevents them from walking arm in arm like we see them do in their first scene together, something that prevents their hands from brushing each other or their elbows touching while they walk, clothes are everything, fashion is everything, Cressida’s looks have always been extravagant, this is where he gets the idea to order Cressida’s mother to tell the modiste “big sleeves”, disguising it as a fashion statement

the next time we see Cressida is here, her sleeves aren’t that crazy yet but noticeably bigger and broader than in that first scene, and it gets crazier from here, we see that it doesn’t quite do what it will do in the future which is to create a distance between these two, but, this is lady Danbury’s ball, the first of the season, the event of the season, the moment to impress the queen, they can’t take fashion risks so they play it safe while also testing their new technique of keeping Eloise at a respectable distance

enter the third time we see Eloise and Cressida, no big sleeves but a huge coat that flows down and outwards, look at what it does to the distance between them while they walk, the idea is working, atleast that's what Cressida's parents think

below are the next two times we see Cressida, the photo on the left isn't that interesting for this theory, one thing that i did realise in this scene is that ladies walk and talk next to each other, ladies and gentlemen make connections while dancing, they're facing each other, the big sleeves make sure people on Cressida's sides (women) stay at a distance while people opposite her (men) can still connect with her, the theory holds up (i recommond rewatching this scene if you're interested in Cressida/Eloise cause Cressida does something really cute where she leans down to hear Eloise better)

the photo on the right however is very interesing and maybe even one of my biggest pieces of "evicende", we can see that Cressida isn't the only one that wears these extravagent dresses with huge sleeves because her mother is wearing the exact same style of dress, in this scene lady Cowper says "You may think me harsh Cressida, but, if you knew the ways your father is trying to put me under his thumb... He has reduced our allowance by half." we learn here that lord Cowper is extremely controlling, not only of his daughter, but of all the women in his life, he sees them as his property, he decides what they wear, where they go, who they talk to, how much money they have, he controls everything, lady Cowper is dressed to keep other men away because she is his property, Cressida is dressed to keep other women away because nothing is allowed to distract or keep her from marrying a man

now there's this next scene, when you first take a quick look it doesn't look like much, there's nothing new about this, until we look at what Eloise does, she reaches out to Cressida and touches her arm, holds it tightly even, when you look closer you can see Eloise and Cressida's ladies maids (I think that's what they're called) in the background, knowing what we know about lord Cowper, even Cressida's maid is under his thumb, she's probably been ordered to watch everything Cressida does and report back to him, maybe she's even been told to keep a closer eye on his daughter's relationship with Eloise specifically, when she comes home later she tells lord Cowper about the physical contact between Eloise and Cressida, he starts to worry and realises his plan might not be working, leading to Cressida's biggest sleeves yet in the bottom photo

look at those things, there's no way Eloise and Cressida are linking arms or brushing hands with those tents attached to Cressida's shoulders, she can still dance with potential suitors cause they will be opposite of one another but when ladies talk to other ladies they're next to each other, we see this over and over again in the show, you will barely see two women talking and have them stand directly face to face

next time we see Cressida and Eloise together is at the library, there's something very noticeable about this photo, the big sleeves are nowhere to be seen, but in the background we can see Cressida's parents, at all other events we've always only seen Cressida's mother present but now her father is with them, Cressida doesn't need the sleeves cause her father is there to watch her every move and listen to every word she says to other people, and she knows this, she appears tense the entire scene (a combination of knowing she's losing lord Debling to Penelope but also feeling her father breathe down her neck)

look at how close Eloise's face is, most of Cressida's dresses wouldnt't allow this, her face would be touching Cressida's sleeve, that barrier isn't on Cressida's dress today, instead the other barrier, her father, came with them to this event

between this screencap and the next there is one more scene that i haven't included but is maybe most important to Cressida/Eloise, it's the "I should like to call on miss Cowper a moment" scene, now i could write a whole other essays about this scene but I'll spare you guys, when it comes to this specific theory I'm explaining here there's not much to add, what is important in this scene however is that when Eloise exits the room we hear lord Cowper say that Cressida cannot see Eloise again... but why not? maybe it's because he knows about Eloise's views on marriage and he's afraid that she will have a bad influence on Cressida but his tone lets me believe that there's more to in than that, he's so angry, he knows that there's more going on even if Eloise and Cressida might not even know themselves

we see Cressida and Eloise together one more time, eventhough lord Cowper told Cressida to not see Eloise again she has big sleeves again, maybe because he was doubtful that she would listen, cause she didn't, she talks to Eloise and spends time with her, for everyone to see, out in the open, she even refuses when Eloise respectfully tells her that it's okay if they can't see each other for a while, she and Eloise laugh together and Cressida aks Eloise a question she's been dying to answer her entire life, a question that no one has ever asked her before, a question that gives them the opportunity to further deepen their relationship, she simply asks Eloise "And how do you see things exactly?" and Eloise's entire face lights up

if you've read this whole thing you're up for a veteran's discount

no but seriously thank you for reading my yap session and please let me know your thoughts in the comments or tags

part 2

reminder that this is simply just a theory (that will probably be disproven after 3B is released)

#Cressida Cowper #eloise bridgerton #bridgerton #creloise

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m1ssunderstanding · 9 months ago

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You know if even Francie is saying it I'm starting to think old Jim Mac may have been slightly abusive, I don't think that's the right word since what happened it was a different time and place etc. But with the way he treated Paul and Mike, especially after Mary's passing and how he expected so much more when his son was one of the most famous musicians in the world, it's just - his whole family to he fair it's like they never really saw him as human and more akin to a musical monkey

Yeah I would actually call it abuse. I think Jim probably had mostly good intentions and genuinely loved his sons, but that doesn't mean his treatment of them was just or didn't have any affect on them. By my definitions, there's emotional as well as physical abuse going on (Paul was expected and pressured from the time they started to realize how intelligent he was to grow up and save his entire family from poverty; Appearances were everything and emotional needs suppressed; There was no financial security; After Mary's death, Paul was extremely patentified, depended on emotionally and materially by the person who was simultaneously physically abusing him)

About the normalization of the physical abuse specifically for a minute, if it was so normal for the time, why is Paul the only one of the four Beatles to have experienced it? My family has always been working class, and my grandparents who are Paul's age were not subjected to the violence that Paul was. Not saying it wasn't more common then and more accepted, but it's also not something you can just pass off as "that's what everyone did in those days".

Also, I wouldn't be surprised at all if even in that one interview where Paul specifically talked about how he got Jim to stop hitting him, he was downplaying. That's what Paul does. We have no way of knowing. But it does fit with Paul's usual story-telling and framing of events that maybe it was more than what he said.

And yeah, the financial abuse started early and clearly continued far into adulthood, maybe up until Jim's death when Paul cut Angie and Ruth off for selling his birth certificate. Paul was trained as a door-to-door salesman for Jim's club as a nine year old in the literal projects. He figured out how to snatch other people's lunch tickets out of the fire at the inny and pass them off as unused. What are we going to do without her money? He first saw John when he was a paper boy and John was buying chips. As soon as the band started making money, he became the head provider of his family (Jim made 10 pounds a week at the cotton brokers while Paul made 15 a week in Hamburg) and when the band wasn't making money, he found whatever work he could to make up for it. Meanwhile, we have no reason to believe Jim wasn't gambling insatiably. As the child of an addict, I know addictions don't just go away and then resurface when they're affordable again, and Jim was certainly an addict. He gambled so much Paul had to buy his house back for him (that he'd bought for him in the first place while Paul himself was living in an attic room like some kind of starving artist at the same time as the rest of the band was buying their mansions).

Paul clearly loved his dad so much and craved Jim's approval, trying to find a girl Jim would approve of after Jane, trying to be a good family man, trying to stay close to his working class roots. You can even see it in his music, from When I'm 64 to A Walk in the Park with Eloise. (I think the 1920s & 30s influence in much of his music came from him genuinely loving it and also from a desire for his dad to appreciate his talent). But he also had no patience for Jim's frailty toward the end, didn't go to the funeral, and didn't write about Jim's death in MYFN.

I really don't know too much about the extended family, anon, but it does seem the case that part of Paul's role in it, from the beginning, was to be a savior and a cash cow, and no one considered his humanity.

#paul mccartney #the beatles #jim mccartney #thanks for the ask!

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i-am-trying-my-best-okay · 10 months ago

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Season Three Bridgerton Predictions (Mostly Just Stuff I Want To Happen)

With Charithra Chandran not coming back in season three, they're going to excuse Edwina's absence by saying she married the prince and is living with him in Prussia.

We get flashbacks of Colin and Penelope as kids, where they were closer, but then we see them get distant because of ✨️society✨️ sending them on different paths.

Francesca, Gregory, and Hyacinth start having a few relevant and independent character moments and actions other than just being 'the younger ones' and have a greater impact on the story.

So. Much. Jealousy. From. Colin. And he doesn't even know it. He sees all their lessons paying off, and he gets jealous, but then he has no idea what he's even feeling. He'll act so passive aggressive with a potential suitor and Penelope's will be like, "What's wrong with you; we had a plan?" And he's like, "I don't know??" "Well stop." "I can't????" He'll land to the conclusion that he just think these men aren't good enough for Penelope for so long. It'll come up in a big argument and she's all like, "Well whose good enough for me? Someone like you?" And then he's like "Yes! Oh." And Penelope is so annoyed because NOW this guy likes her? Just as she was trying to move on? But the thing is she still likes him, so things progress.

Eloise and Penelope avoid each other like the plague, but when Eloise finds out Penelope and Colin are kind of having a thing, and she flips out. She doesn't want Colin to get hurt, so she tells Penelope to steer clear from Colin or she'll tell everyone she's Lady Whistledown. So she does and Colin is very confused and hurt. Then Penelope and Eloise go through some sort of shenanigan and end up having a deep conversation, making up and are once again friends. But then Colin accidently does find out Penelope is Lady Whistledown and is hurt, and Eloise becomes Penelope's #1 defender.

Kate's pregnant, and has the baby within the season. Anthony is freaking out about this; about being a dad, about the baby being okay, about Kate being okay, and how difficult the birthing process will be (trauma from Hyacinth being born). Meanwhile, while Kate is worried about the baby, she's more so focused on what responsibilities she now has as a Viscountess.

They don't reveal the Whistledown secret, at least not to the general public. I think the Bridgerton's will find out, as well as the Featherington's; so when Portia finds out, she sees Penelope in a completely different light, and they have a bonding moment. Maybe in lieu of a big reveal like in the book, at the end of the season the Queen finds out, and instead of exposing her, now she and Penelope sort of work together, aligning their agendas. This elevates the importance of Penelope's work, low key spying for the Queen and reporting on things to manipulate general society. BUT I think Eloise is leaning more to the politically radical side of things, and Penelope's work is now sort of leaning in the opposite direction of that. Despite this, they still find a way to be close friends, despite their very different agendas.

Colin does a big gesture on how he's proud of being with Penelope, that he'll flaunt it in public for all to know.

#bridgerton #polin #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #eloise bridgerton #edwina sharma #francesca bridgerton #gregory bridgerton #hyacinth bridgerton #anthony bridgerton #kate sharma

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myfairstarlight · 6 months ago

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To Have and to Hold - Penelope and Colin's journey to self-love

Companion piece - or one might say part 2 - of An Ode to Friends to Lovers.

Goddammit this was not supposed to be or take this long.

Ahum. Some time has passed, and after sorting through all my thoughts and feelings, here it finally is, my endless ramblings about two friends in love, but not only.

If anyone asks, no I did not take this long to write this post because of the fact that when taking screenshots to illustrate some parts of this analysis I ended up rewatching whole episodes instead.

So, dearest gentle readers, here's my Bridgerton s3 review, with focus on part 2, but looking at the season as a whole too; the highlights, the let downs, and polin's full love story, let's dive in, shall we?

The one thing I really liked about s3, something the other seasons could not do, is how so much is structured around parallels and callbacks to previous seasons, in the narration and in the visuals, for both Penelope and Colin. It is the advantage of having a main couple who's been here from the start, and with them, many other characters get weaved into their story, more particularly in part 2. I think that's why I personally did not mind the fact we did not get flashback sequences, unlike previous seasons (although I would have loved to see baby Colin and Penelope meeting... perhaps with Edmund and Violet watching them play and noting how they were childhood friends as well...) And what can I say? I'm a sucker for parallels as someone who loves to look at the details and perhaps overthink things.

So before we tackle Penelope and Colin individually and as a pair, let's talk about:

Eloise's love for Penelope

Eloise ends up being the catalyst for this second part, when she was mostly an observer in part 1. In many ways, she parallels Colin. Childhood friends with Penelope, betrayed by the Whistledown reveal, and yet still caring and protecting Penelope in her own way, which also paralleled Colin. And because I can, here's a small list:

Eloise distracting Cressida so she does not bully Penelope (s3e1) / Colin refusing a dance with Cressida to dance with Pen instead (s1e1)

Eloise running after her at the Four Seasons ball after accidentally revealing her and Colin's secret / Colin running after Penelope at the ball in s3e1

Colin visiting Penelope to apologise for his comment last season and offering the lessons to help her find a husband / Eloise visiting her to apologise and wish her the best in her endeavour to find a husband

Colin leaving to travel and find himself at the end of previous seasons but staying now / Eloise now travelling to Scotland to find herself

Now that we have the whole season, you can tell that in part 1, she foreshadowed how Colin would react in part 2, he just goes through her whole journey in a lot less time. See the direct parallel at the beginning of e5 as Eloise yells at Penelope and storms out, then Colin swoops in and comforts her, and then the end of e7, where Colin is the one upset with Penelope and after he storms out, Eloise is there, hugging her best friend and telling her everything will be alright.

When one is absent, the other is there for Penelope, because despite everything they love her and they know that through the years, Penelope has loved and supported them as well, even if she was still hiding this big part of her. Penelope makes Eloise feel listened to, and makes Colin feel seen. She was their safe space as much as they were hers.

Eloise is also the very reason Colin learning about Whistledown goes so wrong. She is the one pressuring Penelope to tell him, and also the one who eventually tells her to never tell him the truth when Cressida comes forward and claims to be Whistledown. Yes, Penelope is definitely still at fault as well for taking so long to tell him, but to her credit she did intend on telling him after publishing one last column discrediting Cressida, before being convinced to give it up by Eloise. And then when Cressida manages to publish something, and Eloise is terrified about what it means considering she just broke off their friendship, it is to protect Eloise from her ire that Penelope takes her quill again and sneaks out to publish, which leads to Colin finding out.

Then comes her scene with Colin as he asks his sister how long she's known, where all the parallels come through.

"Have you already forgiven her?"

"I want to. Do you think you can?"

Colin goes on to say Eloise is lucky that she's never been in love, implying that his love for Penelope makes it that much harder to forgive. However, he fails to understand that Eloise is in love as well, perhaps not in the romantic sense, but she is, or she would not have been this distraught for a year over her falling out with Penelope, and yet always somewhat keeping an eye on her. And just like how eventually, as push comes to shove, she finds her way back to Penelope, Colin will do much the same as a looming threat comes their way.

She and Colin are also similar in their insecurity regarding Penelope's love for them, and in turn Penelope spends a good length of the season reassuring them. She constantly tells Colin she loves him, especially after the reveal so he knows that this part of her was never deceiving. She reassures Eloise that their friendship is just as important as her love for Colin and she doesn't want to lose either of them.

The fascinating thing for me about Eloise when taking into account Polin, is that in part 1 they needed her to be away so Colin and Penelope could spend more time together uninterrupted, leading to Colin realising his feelings. This also applies to season 2 actually! While Eloise was in the hunt for LW and distracted by Theo, that's what allowed Colin and Penelope to have a full proper conversation about their purpose, and I'd argue that the moment Penelope said "my purpose shall set me free", something started to shift in their relationship.

In part 2, without Eloise, I wonder if they would have even been able to come together without any more secret between them, if she hadn't been the one to push Penelope to tell the truth, and then the one to support her while Colin was processing his own feelings.

Penelope's ambitions and womanhood

Penelope's journey to self-confidence continues in part 2, this time in regards to Whistledown as she finally accepts her as a part of her, rather than a mask to hide behind. Enters Genevieve Delacroix, the only character in this show who knows what it means to be a woman with a business. It is no coincidence her scene in e6 comes after Portia's talk of "ladies do not have dreams" and after Eloise convinced Penelope to give up Whistledown, because it is just gossip. She directly opposes them.

In part 1, she helped Penelope be more confident by providing her with a new wardrobe that fits her better, and in part 2, Gen is the very reason Penelope learns to be proud of Whistledown, own up to the mistakes, and yet fully claim her as her.

And then, the final nail in the coffin to me: Cressida, in a red "revenge" dress, shows up at the Mondrich ball, and wields the Whistledown name as Confident by Demi Lovato plays in the background. Cressida stands tall and proud despite the whispers, and I think a part of Penelope truly broke then. If Cressida could exhume such confidence for a body of work which is not even hers, then why can't Penelope be proud of what she's accomplished? This past week has been killing her, she admits it to Gen the eve of her wedding, Colin was a great distraction but giving up Whistledown, putting down her quill, it truly hurt her, and a part of her cannot imagine giving it up again. And so Gen gives her the very advice she needed to hear.

"There is no such thing as true love without embracing your true self."

And look at the contrast before vs after her talk with Gen:

Colin, of course, shares Eloise's point of view, Penelope should just give it up, and to be fair, he's more scared for her safety, since he caught her alone in the street at night, and then the Queen just threatened the family again. But Penelope cannot stand for that anymore, she is tired of running and hiding. That is Penelope having the confidence to truly be herself. By the end of e7, she's fully bloomed into the woman she's always been behind her quill. The irony being that Colin was also the one who helped her embrace that in part 1, as he helped her bring out that part of her that he's always been privileged to.

And in e8, we see her take the reins. Do what must be done to protect the ones she cares about.

So let's talk about Portia now, because she may not have a business per se, but she had to essentially become "the man of the house" to keep her daughters safe and the fortune they have intact. I've seen people say her redemption came out of nowhere but I concur that in part 1, as Penelope's confidence starts to grow and she stands up to her family, Portia is already trying to be a better, supportive mother, and in turn, Prudence and Philippa follow her lead. Portia is a practical woman, not a sentimental one, at least she doesn't let herself be, that we have seen since the beginning of the show, that's why she was reprimanding Penelope for being reckless with her reputation by asking for Colin's help, and then was pushing for the match with Debling, because he was a lord, who could offer stability, and who would be away most of the time, leaving the managing of his estate to his wife, to Portia that is (or rather, was) the ideal life a woman can achieve.

I loved that they had Portia learn about Whistledown before the public reveal, because then she has to truly face the fact that she has overlooked Penelope all this time, the daughter who is most like her, and Portia is also the only one who points out that Penelope has written badly about herself. It forces Penelope to face the fact that in many ways, she truly is her mother's daughter as well.

Portia ends up being the driving force behind Penelope's decision to reveal herself as well, I believe. Because we joke about how Penelope hid so much money in the floor boards while her family was going broke but mind you, she had no idea they were having money problems, because Portia tried to hide it to not worry them, the same way Penelope has kept her Whistledown secret in the misguided belief that it was for the better, that she could handle the weight of it all on her own. By revealing herself to the Queen, she could free Colin from her mess, get away from Cressida's blackmail and, if the Queen doesn't behead her, she can save her family's title thanks to her writing and money.

Portia's and Penelope's mending relationship was the highlight of the season for me, the true redemption I wanted to see and am glad I got. And I want to point out a little sweet moment in the last episode:

After the Whistledown reveal, as Portia comes over to praise her daughter, she notices Colin looking in their direction. I personally believe Penelope told her about the annulment, and this is her way to support her before she sends her off to have that conversation with Colin. Portia, who's never been the affectionate mother before, gently caresses her cheek and calls her "My girl", because no matter the outcome she will always remain her little girl.

The beautiful thing about Penelope's ambitions is that they were driven by the women in her life, that's one strength of this season to me. She was inspired by Eloise's strong opinions she so readily shared, Portia's sometimes ruthless ways in the way she protects her family and herself, and Genevieve's smart business endeavours and passion. And so she cannot, won't give that up for a society who is so unfair to women, ironically because the Queen herself is so harsh on debutantes. And isn't it poetic cinema that she ends up revealing herself, in her own terms, during the very ball she fully funded? And after that, it is Philippa, her family she mended things with, who saves her from embarrassment by releasing the butterflies? And then the very same Philippa who during the epilogue, happily declares that her daughter can grow into a successful writer who might not need a husband, just like her little sister?

Side note again but it is also interesting that in contrast we had the Mondrich subplot, wherein Will has to let go of his bar to be accepted in high society (and he's clearly not happy about it), because the London elites do not work, yet here Penelope is, owning a business approved by the Queen.

Penelope's ambitions, in turn, inspire others. Portia, into allowing herself to be soft, Prudence to be more honest (the pregnancy hormones probably helped too), Philippa to readily consider other paths in life, and Eloise into finally doing something and discover a little bit of the world.

And she inspires another Bridgerton as well.

Penelope's bravery and Colin's envy

The thing about Penelope and Colin, and that has been said before, is that their roles are reversed. In romance shows such as these, the man is usually the one with a hard exterior, with secrets he wishes to keep to himself while the woman is the one who encourages him to open up by loving him. That is literally s1 with Simon and Daphne. And even in some ways, it is also Anthony and Kate, the difference being that Kate was not trying to get Anthony to soften up, she was directly confronting him so he fixes his shit himself (I still have beef with Anthony, good for him for becoming a My Wife guy in s3 but man, the journey there was tough).

Anyway. With Penelope and Colin? Penelope is the one with the secrets, who wishes, at first, for a practical match so she may gain her freedom. Colin is the soft-hearted and romantic one, who although offers the lessons, keeps asking her if she likes any of the suitors she talks to. And then, it shifts again. Not in the literal sense, Colin has no secret after he's dropped his rake façade, but he does become a bit colder after the Whistledown reveal, while Penelope becomes the one reassuring him she loves him, and emphasising their emotional bond after she's gained the confidence to do so and accepted that a love match was still in the cards for her. But now, they must overcome Whistledown, the last obstacle she's been hiding behind.

"Well, if she was hiding behind Whistledown, how come Colin calls her brave even before the reveal?"

Well, I'm glad you asked, imaginary person in my head! Let's dial back a bit again.

I am a firm believer that Colin's envy towards Penelope (and him realising his romantic feelings) actually started back in s2, during their talk about purpose. She was the one leading the conversation then, who knew what her purpose would be, and to him, that is bravery, being true to oneself and knowing your place. And we see how in s3 part 1, Colin resorts to adopting a whole new persona, something Penelope does not do, even after changing her entire wardrobe and facing the Ton's eyes, she remains herself (and she is capable of acting! She effortlessly disguises herself as a maid and fakes an accent when delivering the Whistledown papers), and I think Colin noticed that. She has a new dress, and her hair looks different, but she's still Pen, meanwhile he, on the other hand, is pretending to be someone else. And when the scandal about the lessons came out, Penelope still showed her face when people were still preoccupied by the scandal. Debling says it best:

"Well done."

"For being a fool?"

"For stepping away from the herd, even though you risked becoming a target."

Penelope's bravery and honesty are the very reason Debling is interested in her, rather than in Cressida; she knows who she is, and what she likes (whereas Cressida adapts). Sure, he was not looking for a love match, but he was looking for authenticity, which Penelope always had. Because she's terrible at hiding her identity, actually. Eloise guesses it's her after listening to her once! Penelope has never hidden how much she likes gossip. In s2e1 she admits it outright that being a wallflower allows her to hear everything.

Colin rereads her letters and realises, wait, she really is Whistledown, she writes the same way, and although he had mixed feelings about Whistledown, he described her as clever, a quality he's always associated with Penelope as well. She says shit like "it would have been suspicious if she hadn't written about this scandal"... like that girl is not good at hiding herself actually, has never been, it's just that no one really paid her any notice and she was not put into the spotlight until now. I think a part of her unconsciously wanted them to connect the dots because the loneliness was getting to her but she was still scared to own up to it, so she continued to lie.

She's always been true to herself to some degree though, which is its own form of bravery, but she's never had the courage to ask for what she wanted before Colin helped her build her confidence. Colin, on the other hand, may be dense and oblivious, but when he wants something, he is not shy about it, and can even be a bit too impulsive. He's the one who always seeks her out and always tries to protect her and make her happy.

In part 2, as Penelope truly embraces all of herself, just like Colin is learning to be more vulnerable and let go of his ego, the dynamic between them shifts. He's the man, but she got the power.

It started when she gathered the courage to ask for that first kiss, which changed everything, and it solidified when she is the one who seeks Colin at their wedding breakfast. In that instant, he's the wallflower, and she's the one pulling him into the centre and dance in broad daylight.

And this translates in the bedroom too as she goes from following his lead to riding his d-

Ahum, who said that? Anyway, topic at hand. As the dynamic shifts, as Penelope learns to truly be herself and Colin learns the truth, that is when his envy and lack of direction in his own life become too much, and he cannot avoid it anymore. Because he thought he had found his purpose at last, be Penelope's husband, take care of her, provide for her, be the head of their family. But now he learns she's been living a dangerous double life this whole time, that she "mocked" him at the beginning of the season, and she might not even need him to protect her as much as he thought she did because she has money and a prolific career despite being a young lady with minimal agency.

And he had already been struggling before the reveal. In all of part 1, he was grappling with his sense of self, realising that pretending was not worth it if he felt empty and if it meant losing Penelope in the process as well. And in part 2, we already saw him struggling with his writing, only able to write again after Penelope tells him she's loved him for years. And then, he refuses Penelope's help to edit his journals into a book because he wants to prove to himself and to her that he could do it on his own. That he is worthy of her love.

Also note that at that point, Penelope had given up on Whistledown, and wanted to live through him by editing for him as well. Just before, we had the scene where she burned her old Whistledown issues at the same time as Colin was writing, suddenly overcome with inspiration (in this regard, I like that the show ends up allowing Penelope to keep the column and still help Colin with his book, rather than her giving up LW like in the book, where she lives vicariously through him. I know she eventually becomes a romance author in the books, and I hope she also reaches that point in the show, but it is nice she does not have to give up her pen first, you know?)

So when Colin learns she's been a published writer this whole time while he was struggling to find a purpose? Penelope started Whistledown in her first year out after all, at the exact same time, Colin wanted to prove to his family that he can be taken seriously, leading to his disastrous betrothal that season. He had needed to travel to find himself, and even then, it didn't give him the answers he was seeking, and no one was taking his newfound experiences seriously, except Penelope. He's a third son, neither the Viscount, neither the spare, so he had nothing to himself. But Penelope is much in the same situation, a third daughter, from a family less fortunate that his, and yet she has accomplished more than he has. He was already so insecure about his love being unrequited but now that he knows she does not even need to rely on him for financial stability and security? Let's dive more into that, shall we?

Colin's self-worth and ambitions

I've seen a lot of people lament the fact that Colin does not feel as much of a protagonist as Penelope, and while I agree to some degree, such argument fails to take into account the fact that he is the reason the season exists in the first place, not just on a meta level because he's a Bridgerton, but because every action he takes progresses the story. Colin is the driving force of the narrative, while Penelope is the heart of it because he loves her.

He offers the lessons to make up for his comment last season, leading to Penelope gaining in confidence. He interrupts Debling's imminent proposal and chases Penelope's carriage, leading to the engagement. He confronts Portia, leading to her re-evaluating the way she treats her daughters and the Featheringtons mending their relationship. He confronts Eloise and reminds her how obsessed she used to be with Penelope, leading to the reconciliation between the two. He follows Penelope out of worry and learns about Whistledown. When the blackmail happens, he confronts Cressida, this time things get worse (his infamous impulsiveness biting him in the ass once more), but it is still furthering the narrative, leading to Penelope taking things into her own hands and revealing herself in her own terms.

His actions are loud, however his internal growth is much more subtle and we get less scenes of him alone compared to Penelope. And that, I agree, is a weakness of this season. I mean, he spends barely 1/8 of the season upset at Penelope, when people act like he was for half the season. If you watch from the start instead of just looking at part 2, Polin have a lot more happy and cute scenes than angsty ones. Hell! They have more kisses than saphne and kanthony in their own seasons combined, I bet (I didn't count, truth be told, but since they get together halfway through the season, as opposed to in the later half, and had their first kiss in episode 2, I think it's a safe bet to make) (Edit from Star from the future here: so I admit I was wrong. Simon and Daphne have definitely more kisses because they had so many intimacy scenes upon rewatch. I just forgot about them, my bad (mostly, I tend to block out That Scene too, so). Anthony and Kate, on the other hand, were robbed. It's kinda funny Bridgerton built a reputation to be quite spicy, only for none of the seasons after s1 matching the same level lol). I also do feel like a few flashback scenes of him during his travels, waiting for Penelope's letters but getting none as he starts to act like a rake to compensate for the loneliness, contrasted with the lesson scenes in part 1 where he is carefree and silly with Penelope could have benefited his character. I personally do not think he was treated as a "love interest", he carries the season just as much as Penelope, but his emotional weight is lesser than hers, and that was an issue with the writing and pacing.

So here, I must redirect to my other Colin analysis post, as well as this one comparing book vs show portrayal, and though those were unorganised immediate thoughts after watching the show (and vague memories of the book), I still mostly stand by them and so I can also avoid repeating what I've already written.

Colin's insecurity regarding love is a direct result of s1 and, once again, Marina. The parallels between Marina and Penelope are kinda in your face, especially with Colin dropping the entrapment line.

Side note but between Anthony and Colin trying to get with a family member of their future wives first, I sure hope we won't learn Sophie is related to Lady Tilly Arnold or something because otherwise there's a pattern within the ABC bros.

Another thing is that when Marina's lie was revealed, she admits everything else was a lie as well, including her love for him. He was a means to an end, and there's no reason to pretend anymore. But with Penelope? She still tells him she loves him after the fact, and several times after that. Note that, just like with Marina, he learns of the Big Secret while they're engaged. Just like for Marina, he could just walk away now, Penelope even asks him if he wishes to cry off, but he doesn't.

Colin and emotional intimacy

I already made a post about this, but I will reiterate some points anyhow this time, because I need to make some comparisons with Book!Colin, since I've seen a lot of people be upset that unlike his book counterpart, Show!Colin is not physically affectionate with Penelope while still angry at her. So to address this, let's talk about his journals. It is no coincidence that instead of beautiful descriptions of places he's visited, in the show Penelope reads about his experiences with the "women in Paris" and how empty they make him feel. In the book, Colin is older, he is a rake and very much enjoys ladies' company, but in the show, he's only pretending to be one. It's one change they made I liked, to make him different from Anthony and Benedict (when in the books, all these men sorta blend together if I have to be honest). He's the sweet, sensitive brother, who seeks emotional and physical intimacy. Sure, he has experiences, especially after being mocked for being too green, but they felt like obligations, rather than acts of passion (Benedict) or distractions (Anthony). It is also significant that every time someone asks him about his experiences in part 1, he only ever talks about one contessa and never brings up other women, unlike in his journals where, of course, he goes into more details, knowing no one can judge him there.

And then Penelope reads those words, the depths of his mind and his insecurity, and yet she praises him for his writing, rather than mock him for his feelings of inadequacy. That is when it clicks in Colin's mind, although unconsciously, because he flashes back to that scene when he realises his feelings - Penelope is the only other person he feels comfortable enough with to share such thoughts. That's why their first time is such a contrast with the carriage scene, where it was a moment of passion as they get carried (hah!) away after confessing to each other. He was reeling from realising his feelings and narrowly stopping Penelope's engagement to Debling. There was urgency and then relief. Here, it is slower, more tender, because to Colin, this is it, this is where he can prove to Penelope that this was not a mistake, than he can take care of her, bring her pleasure like she could never imagine. He makes sure to tell Penelope how much he loves her, he asks her consent several times, he makes sure she is comfortable. It's a little awkward, unlike the carriage scene, because this is the real and full deal and he sure does not want to mess it up. After all:

That's why I'm not too mad we did not get a montage with them. Their two major intimate scenes are long sequences with few cuts, emphasised by their proximity and the comfort they feel around each other. They're emotional. They're supposed to make the viewer feel like they're interrupting. And Colin does not want to taint these two experiences, that's why the last intimate scene we get is after they reconcile (though we deserved a longer one). So, to quote myself: Colin does not let his lust take over when he's upset, because Penelope means too much to him. He does not want to lay together only to wake up in a cold bed and still be fighting in the morning. He wants to be hers, body and soul, fully and assuredly, and until he accepts the fact he loves her because of Whistledown and not despite since they are one and the same, then he cannot promise Penelope all of himself either. In his mind, he may be afraid that this emotional intimacy he felt with Penelope when they laid together will be ruined, or just simply gone while he is so tortured by the Whistledown reveal. Everything else is a mess right now but that part of their relationship? It was pure and sincere, and he wants to keep it that way.

And not to dunk on Book!Colin again but that man had anger issues and could be violent, he knew he was hurting her sometimes and did not do shit to stop that. Why would you prefer that over Show!Colin keeping a respectful distance and yet still staying close to Penelope, trying his best to protect her despite it all?

After all, the only time he gives in while they're still fighting is when they argue in the streets and Penelope shouts "I love you" to his face. That is the first time she confesses in the present tense. And for a second, Colin's walls crumble. He's a sensitive man, after all, even when he's upset, he ends up tearing up, so the declaration of love answering his "Then what good am I to you?", a question encompassing all of his insecurities in a few words, well, it's the emotional outburst that makes him almost give in, if they weren't in the middle of the street with carriages passing by. They were also both tipsy in that scene lol.

And while I'm at it, let's link back to my post regarding the entrapment line and the annulment. One thing I fail to mention (there already are so much, to be fair) is that Colin throwing an entrapment accusation can also be interpreted as him giving himself an excuse to remain engaged. The previous episode, he was worried they got carried away in the carriage (and then their future home) and that Penelope was changing her mind. As already mentioned, at that point, just like with Marina he could just walk away. They're only engaged, and no one knows they have been intimate. Sure, it would go against his principles as a gentleman but honestly he already broke them several times when Penelope is involved. And he knows that. He never actually intends to back down, he is determined to marry Penelope, as he said in that carriage this is "a feeling that is like torture, but one I cannot, will not, do not want to give up". But in that one moment, he was hurt and angry and knew what to say to hurt, and did not want to admit that he would have stayed either way because he loves her (and frankly, in this situation, Penelope is in the wrong and she kinda deserves to feel bad about wanting to hide such a thing from him, even if the accusation itself is unfair). So he gives the decision some duty, some responsibility. He's a gentleman, so he must do what's objectively right. Because that is easier than looking into the complexity of his feelings.

And that is marriage to me. Marriage is not a happily ever after. It's a choice, to stay by someone's side through the good and the bad times. And in that moment, he also made his choice, and knew Penelope would be his wife. From then on, they learn to communicate. They were in sync as friends, but as a husband and wife? That is different, even if the foundation is similar, they need to relearn how to navigate life together.

Episode 8 is all about them figuring this out.

Take these scenes for example. First of all, this has been pointed out by many already but: Colin may be mad, but he still stays close to her by sleeping on the settee just outside their bedchamber instead of taking another room. That's dedication.

Right away, Colin establishes a boundary between them and asks for some space, however, he still waits for her to wake up to tell her rather than leave without a word and having the servants inform her. She's visibly upset about it, insisting he should stay so they can talk, but he still leaves. Halfway through the episode, the situation is now reversed, Penelope emerges, already dressed while Colin clearly has not slept all night, she tells him she is leaving and giving him the space he asked for, and it is Colin's turn to be upset and realising that, no, actually he does not really like that distance anymore.

Note that until that point, they both were very confrontational whenever Whistledown was brought up, Penelope on the defensive and Colin on the offensive, they're both third children who were belittled so that is how they respond - Penelope by standing her ground and refusing to budge, and Colin by attacking and asserting himself. But here, Penelope listens to Colin's wants, and lets go a little. She gives him the space he needs, all the while she is also planning how to fix all this mess without lying to or hurting more people. And then later on again, Colin is the one who listens to her needs and her plan. That is the beginning of a healthy marriage as they both let go of their egos, as they both take a step back to listen to the other and realising they no longer have to do things alone, because actually, that distance between them was hurting both of them. Penelope accepts she can rely on others' support and Colin accepts that it is not what he can do that makes him worthy, but simply who he is.

People lament that in the Whistledown public reveal, Colin ended up not contributing much, as opposed to his book counterpart, but that is literally what Penelope asked him to do. She does not need a hero, she needs her Colin. Kind, supportive Colin, who reassured her with a simple smile and a nod on their wedding day, and who did the same when she stepped into the light once more at the Butterfly Ball. He gives her courage, by virtue of being there and loving her. Just like she gives him a purpose by simply loving him as well. The very thing Colin envied, Penelope's bravery? Well, he is one of the reasons it exists in the first place.

In the book, Penelope had no idea Colin was planning to reveal her identity, until the last, like, five minutes. He also told Anthony and Simon behind her back. I love the balcony scene but it always bothered me that Penelope's agency in that decision was taken from her. Therefore I love that they gave it back to her in the show. Just like she said in s1e8, Whistledown cannot be unmasked but if one day she shall be, then it would be in her own terms.

(I also want to say though that despite my criticisms earlier, Book!Polin remain one of my favourite dynamics in the books because despite it all, they're one of the healthiest couples. They work together as a team, and it helps Colin learned about LW before he proposed. They discuss Cressida's blackmail, whereas in the show Colin first dismisses Penelope in his need to prove himself capable of protecting her. We see them encourage each other in their writing more than in the show (fingers crossed for s4 though!) and they even discuss how they will keep Pen's Whistledown money for their children. They're a team, through and through, and in the show, we see the start of that, which makes sense, their show counterparts are ten years younger, not as mature as they are on paper.)

All through part 2, Colin stayed true to his confession in that carriage. His love was like torture. He was so insecure about Penelope not loving him as much as he does, questioning what good he even is to her and if she just lied. And yet he held on and did not want to give it up, he embraced it rather than ran from it like the other leads we had so far. He was shattered by the Whistledown secret and yet, he remained, worked through his sense of self, through his anger, through his insecurity, because Penelope is worth it. He was willing to lie for her, to lie to Benedict to get the money needed, to protect her. And Penelope clung to him just as fiercely, always reminding him that she loves him for simply being him. One always has worth. That is the validation Colin has always craved, that is when it truly sinks in for him and that he understands her selfless love for him; he does not need to pretend, he does not need to be useful, he does not need to have everything figured out, he can breathe. Penelope will be there every step of the way. Has always been, in fact, she's always been a constant in his life, and now that he is lucky enough to stand by her side and soak even a little bit of her light, well, he sure won't ever let go again.

And to end this section, not really a point of analysis, but shoutout to my girl Pen whose first instinct when she realises she can touch Colin is to reach for his hair and boy does he melt at the touch. Unlocked his hair pulling kink right there.

This is still a friends to lovers story

Fear not, the romcom vibes are still here! I kept this part for the last to end on a sweet note, just like this season. And this is also the part where I stop pretending to be a reviewer and I just allow myself to be self-indulgent, pointing out how cute these two are.

So, first of all:

They just fucked and what's the first thing they do together? Laugh. In the carriage, Colin did make a joke, prompting the laughing but in the mirror scene? They simply look at each other and start chuckling because they are so giddy upon realising this is real, they're best friends, and they're in love, and they'll be married and they will soon be able to do this whenever they want. Then, Penelope lets out a bit of her insecurity, hoping this was just as good for Colin as it was for her since she knew he was more experienced, and when he reassures her, Penelope grins and jokes about "the women in Paris", which she does again during the Mondrich ball, teasing him about the spicy parts of his journals. She is so secure in their relationship, she feels no jealousy towards Colin's past experiences but bet if anyone ever brings up Debling again, Colin would lose it, and I kinda wish we had at least one scene of Colin properly addressing his one-sided beef with Debling.

During their whole engagement (and before the LW reveal), they're just so incredibly in love, so sweet it might give you cavities, and it was such a breath of fresh air after two seasons and one spin-off of the main couple never really embracing their love until the later part of the seasons. The way Colin makes Penelope smile during the reading bans scene, then when they dance alone in the church, or when Colin adds the twirl (the flourish!) during the dance at the Mondrich ball and then when they laugh at the Butterfly Ball when everything is said and done and they can finally, fully be themselves... They are just two romantics at heart who are thrilled to be in love and miss no opportunity to flaunt it in front of the Ton who's always judged them so harshly. I wish I could include videos in this because posting screenshots would not give those moments justice.

And the comedic aspect of the romcom vibes of this season are still present in part 2, although a bit overshadowed by the Whistledown drama but I mean:

Penelope and Colin finally having a chaperone in Portia, and having no idea how to act now because they never had to worry about a chaperone before (and by that point, Penelope is already pregnant)

Poor Kanthony trying to find the right time to announce the pregnancy but here come Polin, getting engaged out of nowhere

Portia and Violet's tentative beginning of friendship, wherein Violet is trying so hard to be polite when faced with Portia's over-enthusiastic attitude

The whole charade scene with Anthony getting so competitive and glaring at poor Penelope when she gets the answers right.

All the times someone brought up Whistledown's imminent unmasking and Penelope taking psyching damage every time (meanwhile in part 1, it was everyone telling Colin how kind of him it is to help Pen find a husband). Peak "actions have consequences huh". She could not catch a break. Which okay, she was panicking and then fainted but I still find it a little funny because girl, you kinda had it coming.

The whole scene of Penelope revealing the money she made with Whistledown and Colin's, Eloise's and Portia's reactions.

And I'm probably forgetting other parts. It has now been confirmed as well that a lot of the reshoots were to make the season more light-hearted, more romcom, and they had Colin be less angry than he originally was in the script (notably after their wedding breakfast), so even if I resent that dreadful wig they put on my poor man, I'm so grateful the season remains, overall, more romcom than true drama like the other seasons could have been, because at the end of the day, this is the love story of two friends who already cared so deeply for each other. Honestly, I'd argue the true angst of the season came more from Eloise's and Penelope's rekindling friendship (and also Cressida's home life) (the true love triangle).

And speaking of truly knowing one another, let's go back to the one thing that brought Colin and Penelope together: the letters.

Note how loosely bound Penelope's letters to Colin were compared to the other pile, because he has kept them with him during his travels this past summer and kept rereading them when she did not respond back. And just like the letters (or lack thereof) were the first clues that something had shifted in their relationship and Colin realises how much he misses her, her letters also become the reason he reconciles Penelope with Whistledown because oh yeah, the writing is the same, clever, sharp, and beautiful, just like his Penelope. As he rereads them, he realises how he himself overlooked Penelope for so long, how he was compelled by her quill, how powerful it was that they made him feel more confident and how their absence made his sense of self crumble. The same way, upon his return, Whistledown calling him out, shattered that new self he had tried so hard to build. Penelope was the reason he found his confidence, then lost himself when she did not respond, and the reason he had to look inward when, through Whistledown, she saw through his facade.

But also isn't it sweet, that he unknowingly always praised her writing? Of her letters obviously, but of Whistledown as well. For all his negative feelings about the gossip column, one thing he always admitted is how clever Whistledown is, hence why he did not even believe Cressida could actually be her. Deep down, he's always admired her writing, even if he did not realise it was her yet. He was so attached to her letters after all.

And speaking of writing? Penelope becomes his muse.

That is him writing about Penelope's debut, proving he's always paid attention to her, between this, him being the one to bring up how they met, and recalling all the times Eloise kept bringing up Penelope in conversations. And he's writing all of this after the church dance scene! After Penelope's declared her love for him and how she's loved him for years! He was lamenting that love made him so simple he could not write a single word, but it is love that fuelled his mind once more and broke his writer's block. And then in the epilogue, he is so proud to say Penelope helped him edit his book, he who, a couple of episodes earlier, was so determined to do this on his own to prove himself, now his pride is that he worked together with his wife and they are building a family, and a writing empire, together.

The season ends as they kiss in front of the very window Penelope often sat in front of, overlooking Bridgerton house, hoping to catch a glimpse of Colin, who now will always be looking at her first. They also now have the heir to the Featherington barony, and they inherit the very house with the garden where Colin first broke Penelope's heart, then mended it by offering his help, then where they shared their first kiss. It is theirs now.

And it's just! They're so in love! I have no other words (also this post is so long, I am getting tired myself I probably sound like a broken record by now).

Conclusion

I think Bridgerton s3 has officially become a comfort watch. I'm never one to really rewatch shows, but this specific season has joined the small list I have. As already mentioned, when it comes to romance, friends to lovers has always been a favourite and Polin is such a good depiction of the trope. They're the gigglers on the side of balls, the ones who did not so much seek the centre stage but were thrown in the middle of it, which fits so well even on a meta perspective because Luke and Nicola admitted they sure did not expect their season to come this early either. They won't be the most popular couple, perhaps, but my God, they are mine. Despite the length of this post, I think I probably still forgot some points but oh well, gotta stop somewhere and I'm sure people more eloquent than I made posts as well.

This season was not perfect, I have a lot more gripes about it than this long post makes it sound like (although they're mostly non-polin related or something about the production), but I like to focus on the positives. And for all its flaws, s3 sure knew how to deliver a sweet romance between two outcasts who found their home with each other.

And with that, dearest gentle readers, this humble author - or rather, this person who fancies themself an author at their lost hours - finally lets their old keyboard rest, and hopes you have enjoyed this long read into a mind with too many thoughts about a gentle, kind man who has a lot of love to give and a fierce, passionate woman who wants to be loved.

(The sweetest little parallel to end this on, ever since s1, he's always seen her <3)

#THIS IS A LONG RIDE YALL GOOD LUCK #bridgerton #bridgerton spoilers #bridgerton thoughts #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #polin #eloise bridgerton #peneloise #yes im tagging them too!#portia featherington #character analysis #long post #star.txt #the beginning of this post is lowkey just me arguing peneloise is as canon as polin /j #also posting this as pride month ends but just know polin are demisexual in my heart

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thataddylady · 6 months ago

Text

Analysis: 'To Sir Phillip with Love' What do Philoiseers love about Eloise x Phillip?

So on to the final part, what do we like so much about this pairing and this book? This book has the vibe of Persuasion by Jane Austen, Charlotte Heywood x Alexander Colbourne from Sanditon, or Keanu Reeves and Sandra Bullock in The Lakehouse.

This is for the late bloomers who thought they needed to give up because there was no chance of finding their match and ended up finding the love of their lives.

Eloise was a character I related to. From the strong personality, the rambling and the anxiety about life passing me by, to the prank war with the kids that eventually breaks the ice. I saw myself in her. Eloise is a character with a high opinion of herself but she is very aware that it's not a shared opinion. Which is isolating. Her family loves her but her brothers avoid her and her sisters don't share her interests. No one has the stamina to keep up with her. She's looking for peace and companionship over love.

But then she meets Phillip. He's isolated, has been mostly ignored and passed over most of his life. He is an untapped mine of humor, intellect, tenderness and love. He is desperate for help with his children and his life, it's true, but he is also touch starved and desperate for someone to talk to. he reaches out to Eloise because through their letters to each other he thinks they could find friendship and companionship. Ultimately they want the same things.

What they both end up getting is a champion in their corner who sees them, understands them and appreciates everything they bring. Phillip is a character who has never really had anyone take an interest in him or his interests. Eloise is a person who has always been told that she is too much, too pushy, too talkative. Neither of them are a good fit for society life.

It's the fact that Phillip loves listening to Eloise talk, and genuinely adores pretty much every aspect of her personality. He loves and values how bossy and opinionated she is, he loves how she expresses herself. He loves how intelligent and expressive she is, he loves how capable she is. He is not cowed or put off by these very strong parts of her personality. When her brothers make a joke at her expense he is the first to tell them to knock that shit off, despite the fact that they nearly killed him when they first meet. He loves the color and noise and energy she brings to his life and he nurtures it in her. This is something Eloise has never had with anyone else, not even her family.

For Phillip, Eloise is able to give him a clearer and healthier perspective on his life. The first time anyone tells him "No your father was a monster and I wish he was alive so I could thrash him." is Eloise. The first person to say "I don't think anyone or anything could have made Marina happy," which is a fact (it was beyond his ability as she was clinically depressed with severe postpartum depression) is Eloise. She is the first person he is able to talk to about his marriage and lift the weight of bearing it alone. Eloise is the first person to tell him his children need him and miss him because they love him.

It is something you think is obvious, but he legitimately doesn't realize it. If you look at his history, it makes sense that he would also see his children as people who are stuck with him because there was no one else. His life has also taught him that no matter how hard he tries, he will never be enough, never be what someone needs or wants. When he marries Eloise, he thinks he's gotten them the parent they always deserved, someone better than him. The idea that they genuinely want to be around him as well is not something he has considered.

His children, who are super clever but mischievous and adorable think Eloise hung the moon and basically agree to make her their leader.

Essentially, Phillip and Eloise both become more of themselves but better in a very supportive, loving, wildly passionate relationship. Like they are having sex on the regular. If you think Colin is obsessed with Penelope, buckle up because you haven't seen Phillip Crane. Their love story is the adage that 'everything about you the wrong person couldn't handle is the exact thing the right person has been waiting for'.

The critique I hear a lot is readers wanted Eloise with someone more exciting who challenges her. Phillip isn't a reformed rake with rogueish charm and toxic masculinity who needs a loving touch from the right ball buster to remind him to be human. And I can see the appeal for that kind of hero, especially for Eloise. But would that hero be a better match for Eloise, or is it simply a more entertaining story with a flashier hero for a flashy heroine?

The truth is Eloise is surrounded by people who challenge her. What she lacks is acceptance vs tolerance and genuine appreciation for what she's been told are flaws. Her brothers hate shooting with her because she's too good. Phillip doesn't care, he loves to see her be her awesome self. Her brothers find her too domineering, Phillip loves that she always has a plan and an opinion to share. Phillip isn't a pushover incapable of standing up to her. But he isn't going to fight or argue with her for the sake of it. He'd rather help her do what she wants to do and then make love to her all night afterwards.

Eloise is a person who is in constant battle with the world, with opinions and forces she cannot control but certainly would like to. Does she really need someone to challenge her at home or does she need someone who sees her as she is and accepts her fully, giving her a warm soft place to land? Does she need a sparring partner or a quiet champion who adores her, nurtures her, and is ready to step up to smooth her way when she needs it?

That's all I got folks.

@whatsaweekend this is it!

#to sir philip with love #sir phillip crane #eloise bridgerton #eloise x phillip #philoise #It's my favorite book for a reason #I make no apologies #TSPwL Musings Pt 3

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newtonsheffield · 7 months ago

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Molly,

Apparently most reviewers agree with you that the season/writing is just awful. And a LOT of people are furious over losing Michael. Did the writers not read that book? All Franny ever wanted was a quiet life and children. You cut her story at the knees if you make her love interest a woman. She can't have a child in the 1800s without a husband. What are they going to say she had IVF? 🤦‍♀️ I agree they get an extended season next year for Benedict and Eloise combined (10-12 episodes) and then its over. They only were renewed one more year anyway and Netflix (which cancels everything) isn't going to be happy with a new season every two years.

Okay here’s the thing now that I’ve had time to organize my thoughts about Michaela Stirling being introduced.

I’m not opposed to her. Initially when they introduced her immediately after Eloise asking to go to Scotland I was like “Ohhhh Eloise is going to fall in love with Michaela and Francesca and John will ride off into the sunset (sit quietly and not talk)”

But I think Francesca’s reaction to Michaela, and her reaction when she kissed John at their wedding makes that unlikely.

So to my mind there’s two ways this goes now.

1) John dies. Michaela and Francesca grow closer. Etc etc. the exact storyline just with a woman instead of a man. They end up adopting children because Francesca still yearns for a baby. Sweet. I even like it. Michaela being a woman does introduce difficulty in the fact that were John to die there would be another Earl of Kilmartin who is not her. And so we cannot assume that this Earl would allow Francesca so many liberties. Michael did because he was in love with her. This new Earl likely won’t. But the show will likely… conveniently send them to India

2) John does not die but senses the attraction between his cousin and wife and allows them to be together while staying married to Francesca. Their marriage basically becoming a beard. This makes me a little sad to think of because I think there was power in the subtlety of Francesca and John’s relationship. That’s what he all thought was sweet the first time round. To have her so thunderstruck by Michaela I think makes it seem a little that Francesca mistook the companionship she felt with John for with love.

My issue with Michaela Stirling is mostly that, and I’ve said numerous times that this was a story I was concerned about the show tackling, I don’t think the show is capable of portraying the subtlety a story like this deserves. I would love to be wrong though.

#bridgerton spoilers #bridgerton season 3

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thorin-is-a-cuddler · 6 months ago

Text

Dark words and warm hugs

A/N: Benedict steals a poem from underneath your nose to get on your nerves, willing to read it out to the entire family. But he does not expect the poem to be as sad as it turns out to be. Hurt/Comfort fanfic with mostly Benedict and (Y/N), but Colin, Eloise, Hyacinth and Gregory also play a role in it. (I have left open what exactly the poem is about so that everyone can put a spark of themselves into this! I hug you all!)

“Benedict! Give. It. BACK!”

Decisively you stomped after your brother who was scurrying into the living-room like a giddy cookie thief, holding a folded sheet of paper in his hand. Hyacinth looked up in wonder from the pianoforte, while Gregory and Colin stopped swinging wooden swords at each other. Eloise didn’t even bother raising her eyes from her book, quite contrary to your mother who dropped the newspaper onto the table before her so suddenly that the paper got wrinkled. Sighing loudly, she followed her second youngest daughter and her second eldest son with attentive eyes to make sense of the sudden commotion.

Benedict quickly took shelter behind one of the sofas and teasingly waved the paper in his hand, when you came to a halt on the other side of the piece of furniture.

“Ah, ah, ah,” he taunted, the smugness making his smirk seem almost devilish, “now be a good sister and stay right where you are! We are civilized people after all!”

“So civilized,” you fired back at him with a force that made your mother flinch and Colin blink, “that you come into my room and steal poems from under my nose! It is not ready, give it back to me!”

“Now, now, that is a very serious accusation, dearest sister! I did not steal a single thing, I simply picked it up to- HGH!” The unexpected manoeuvre to jump on the sofa and attempt to grab your brother behind it failed, when Benedict circled it fast enough to end up behind the backrest of the one standing on the other side of the room. Next to it, your mother was sitting at a small table, watching you both with growing surprise.

“(Y/N), would you please refrain from climbing on the furniture with your shoes on!” She chastised half-heartedly, too enraptured in the quick changing of positions you and your brother were engaged in at the very moment to think of ending it all with one simple order.

Your shoulders slumped down and your voice was tinted by utter disappointment when you directed your complaint at your mother. “Mamma, how can you tell me off when my so called brother is the one who is acting like a complete child-“

“Oh, scarry moon, oh splendid field-“

“NOO!!” You screamed so loud that Gregory actually yelped in pain and proceeded to cover his ears. Benedict giggled like a three year old as he interrupted his aloud reading of your verses to escape yet another one of your attempts to get your hands on him. You ended up on opposite sides of the sofa, Eloise was reading on, and she did not seem happy about the disruption.

“Can’t you take your shenanigans outside?” She groaned, when you had circled her sofa twice, Benedict still giggling and you still huffing in frustration.

“Why is not one of my beloved siblings considering to help me??” You called out in frustration, glaring daggers at your smirking brother who thought himself invincible in that very moment.

“Perhaps they are all as excited as I am to hear what our dear sister puts onto paper on this lovely, lovely morning!” Benedict declared, as he tried to peek another glance at the dark lines covering the page.

“Well, perhaps it is not meant for either of your eyes to see nor ears to hear!!” You extended your hand meaningfully to demand your poem back from your brother, but he merely made a pitiful grimace and sucked in the air through his teeth apologetically.

“Ah, see, (Y/N), the problem is that that only intrigues me even more.”

And with that he resumed his reading – silently at the very least – as he continued to stumble away from your attempts to get him to stop. Until he did actually stop. His expression changed entirely, from humorous to serious, and he looked up from the paper with blue eyes full of remorse. That only made it worse for you.

“(Y/N), I…”

“Are you happy now??” You shouted, feeling anger put its feeble hands around your throat and suffocate your voice with tears and shame. “You think everything is so funny! Well, sometimes it’s not!” Deeply hurt, you ripped the paper out of his hands and threw your fists against his chest once with force. He barely moved from the impact, but shrunk in on himself nevertheless, his eyes dripping with regret and his lips growing hard.

You didn’t wait for another word from anyone of your shocked family, turned on your heels and hurried out of the grand room to find solace and shelter in your own space. You heard Benedict shout your name again, but did not look back. With the back of your hand you brushed away the tears that threatened to fall, as you ran up the stairs, far away from the shame that was left in the room with everyone else. You shut the door behind you, turned the key in the lock and hid yourself in your bed to cry and to forget about it all – the shame, Benedict’s look of horror when he realized what you had written, but mostly the thing itself. You promised yourself never to write about such matters again, if the only outcome was the incomprehension of everyone you cared about.

It hurt you especially that it had been Benedict who had reacted that way. Anthony, alright, Daphne, sure. But Benedict? You’d always considered him to be the most empathetic Bridgerton, the softest and sweetest. But apparently his understanding knew its limits as well. You wanted him to come to your room and make it all better again, but at the same time you didn’t want him anywhere near you in that moment. You were not sure, you’d be able to take it if you brother were to treat this matter as if it disgusted him, as if you disgusted him.

No, for now, all that was left for you was your pillow and the safe warmth of your blanket.

It did not take long for Benedict to come to your door and knock as carefully as if he was knocking on a wound he did not mean to worsen any further.

“(Y/N)?”

You put a pillow over your head and tried to sink deeper into your sheets to disappear from the face of the earth forever.

“(Y/N), can I please talk to you? Please?”

As always, your brother’s gentle voice made you feel weak and defenceless and stirred the need to be held and cradled by him for many hours until nothing hurt anymore. But this time, his voice also carried a needle with it that stung you in the lungs and made it harder to breathe.

“Go away,” you called weakly, your own words making you sad enough to bring tears to your eyes. You did not actually want him to go, but you were also scared to face his judgement on your words.

You could hear your brother let out a shuddered breath before your door – he was not used to you telling him to ‘go away’ in a serious manner and it hurt him like an actual weapon. His pain only worsened your own, since it all seemed to come from you; you were the source of all the pain that circulated in the Bridgerton mansion that very day and you did not know how to make it stop.

“(Y/N), please,” Benedict asked again, his voice shaking ever so slightly. “Can I please be there for you right now? Please. Please.”

The pauses between his words made your tears roll down your cheeks big and hot and painful. Why did your brother have to use lines that made your insides feel weaker than pie filling? Of course, you wanted him to be there for you. You did not want him to think less of you. You did not want to see an ounce of wariness in his eyes. All you wanted was for him to forget you’d ever written the lines of that day. Perhaps, he would grant you that wish…

“Wait,” you sniffed out shakily and got up from your bed. With a thumping heart in your chest, you walked to the door and unlocked it, only to then make a run for your bed again in order to hide your tear stained face from Benedict’s curious eyes.

You heard the door creak as it opened and the gentle click when it closed again. Footsteps approached the bed carefully and came to a halt right next to you.

You squeezed your eyes shut, when you felt the mattress move beneath his weight and turned you face away, when your brother lifted the light blanket you were hiding beneath to slip underneath it as well. He let it fall around the two of you, the light of the day bright enough to make everything perfectly visible under the textile’s protection.

“Hey,” he breathed out in a consoling tone, his hand gently curling around your shoulder. Your lips turned into a thin line to keep quiet, but a sob shook your body so violently that nothing could have contained or concealed it. “Oh, (Y/N), it’s alright. It’s going to be alright. I am here!” You wanted to stay turned away from your brother, but he repeated such nice calming words while rubbing over your back that you would have needed a heart of stone to remain indifferent. Violently, you turned around and threw your arms around him, your following sobs muffled by his white shirt. He wrapped his arms around you as tightly as possible and carded his fingers through your hair, repeating a calming noise until your sobs turned from earthquakes into human noises again that allowed you to speak.

“I am sorry I hit you!” You stuttered into your brother’s arm, holding on to his shoulders for dear life to un-hug the way you’d pushed him earlier. Benedict made a disregarding noise and rubbed your back a few times to convince you of how little it meant to him.

“Please, (Y/N), you had every right to be angry with me. There is nothing you need to feel sorry for. I should never have read that poem. You did not want me to do it and I did not respect that. It is I who is sorry. Truly sorry!” It was his turn to bury his face in your shoulder and hold on to your shoulders, asking for forgiveness with every fragile breath that blew against your ear. It saddened you so much that fresh tears sprang to your eyes. You copied his movement from earlier and started rubbing up and down his back to soothe him. Apparently he had been just as scared as you had been that you might treat him coldly or with little understanding. The thought seemed ridiculous to you now – as if that could ever have truly happened with you or Benedict.

“At the same time, I am glad I read it, (Y/N). I am glad I got to see the fears you are apparently dealing with all by yourself. They are very substantial and best not shouldered alone.” For the first time since he’d entered your room, you moved your face in front of his, letting him see the wreckage of your puffy eyes and witnessing the red-rimmed ones of his. You gently pushed your ever-cold fingers against his cheeks and felt your lips twitch, when his eye-lids closed in relief.

“I was scared you might think them weird. Or rather … me!” You admitted, breathing out calmly when your brother’s hands moved up to cup your face. He opened his blue eyes and looked at you fondly.

“Nothing could ever make me think you weird,” he stated with emotion in his voice. “You are my sister and I will tease you for the rest of your days, but unless you drink exotic tea from Greece, I will never ever think you weird!”

That actually made you laugh despite the tear-heavy weight on your voice. His features immediately grew lighter again and his lips curled upwards.

“And I must say,” he continued, “the dark issue aside – it was a really good poem.”

“You think so?” You asked surprised, your eyes growing wider.

He nodded meaningfully. “Yes! You have a way with words, (Y/N). It is a talent you should pursue further! Don’t be scared of the dark parts it might reveal within you. But never forget to talk to me about it…”

“In fact,” you looked him in the eyes, lifting the blanket a little with your hand to be able to look at them directly, without any fabric getting in the way, “I was going to ask you to forget you’ve ever read the one from this morning… I don’t wish to remember it myself!”

Benedict narrowed his eyes for a moment, before he made a quick gesture next to his head, accompanied by a grimace. “Done!” He exclaimed. “I have successfully forgotten everything about it.”

You were about to roll your eyes, when he gasped loudly. “In fact I seem to have forgotten everything else as well. How did I get here? Why are we under this blanket? Who are you??”

Biting your tongue usually helped, when you wanted to keep from laughing, but not when it came to Benedict. A grin worked its way on your face as you tried to grab a hold of his gesticulating hands. “Ben, stop!”

“Where am I? Who am I??” He threw the blanket off the two of you, allowing for you both to breathe fresh air again and get blinded by daylight, as you tried to get a hold on your exaggerating brother.

“Ben!!” You chuckled, fighting to keep him on the mattress as he moved into a sitting position.

“I am not even sure of what I am anymore! A cat, a man, a weasel??”

“You are so silly!” You groaned through your laughter, sitting up as well and placing your hands on his shoulders.

Benedict squinted his eyes at you insecurely and stopped his little act, a blush creeping over his cheeks. “Not too silly, I hope.”

You remembered the words you had fired at him earlier, about how everything seemed to be funny to him. Apparently you had scratched at his core with that statement. Regret came over you again and you slumped in on yourself slightly. To make up for it, you wrapped your arms around his neck and pushed your head against his, humming when you felt one of his arms warm on your own.

“No, brother, you are not too silly for me!”

He gently rubbed his hand over your arm for a while, indulging in the hug for a few moments, before he suddenly made his upper body fall back on the sheets, taking you down with him. With a quiet shriek, you fell on his chest, laughing brightly, when his hands grabbed for you and pulled you entirely on top of him. His glinting blue eyes promised schemes of mischief and fun.

“How about we make you fly again, like when you were little?”

You scoffed meaningfully and pushed yourself up slightly, you fingers digging into his collarbone making him flinch – something you noted with a little smirk. “I am way too heavy for that now, brother!”

“Says who?”

“Says I!” You squeezed his sides playfully, making him yelp and bark out a breathy laugh. You waggled your eyebrows at him.

“I think there are better ways to entertain ourselves now!”

“Don’t even think about it!” He threatened with a determined look in his eyes. But your position gave you quite the advantage, so there was little he could do, when your hands decided to find their way past his arms and into his armpits, forcing him to throw his head back with deep, hearty laughter.

“NO PLEASE!” He giggled instantly, turning his head from left to right and trying to push you off, which included getting his hands on your knees and squeezing them rapidly. That was unfortunately a counter attack that worked quite well on you and so you found yourself pinned underneath him way too quickly, doomed to suffer at the hands of the ingenious tickler your brother was, always had been and always would be.

“Oh how the turn tables,” he laughed, as his hands wandered up and down your shaking sides, reducing you to a giggling mess and leaving you no chance to wiggle out from underneath him.

You were laughing so hard, you barely heard your door opening a crack with Colin peering inside, the younger siblings and Eloise by his side. Benedict only noticed it, when Colin whispered something to Hyacinth and Gregory and they came storming in with a war cry, jumping on top of their older brother and trying to push him off of you. Benedict’s exaggerated wails of terror and your younger siblings rather quirky attempts to overpower him made your laughter only increase. Benedict felt compelled to raise his arms and shout “I am not touching her!” to prove himself innocent of your hysterics, but that only made matters easier for the legacy of siblings at your service now. Hyacinth used the opening to start tickling underneath Benedict’s arms, while Gregory pushed at your brother to make him fall over. Benedict couldn’t keep from chuckling at Hyacinth’ technique, but grabbed Gregory, your knight in shining armour to subdue him to some tickling of his own. This was when Colin emerged into the room, with Eloise following suit, both of them pointing fingers at Benedict.

“We see the advance-guard has been overpowered. But we will not be such easy targets!”

Eloise cackled smugly, when she saw Benedict’s expression turn quite horrified at the outlook of such a team fighting against him and immediately let go off the giggling Gregoy. You wrapped your arms around your youngest brother and bit your lip in anticipation of what was to come next. It moved you that the other four had come to help you. It moved you that Benedict had come up to make things alright again, but things would look even brighter, in your opinion, if your second oldest brother would have to fight off an entire Bridgerton army at your service.

Benedict seemed to reconsider his options and huffed out a scared little chuckle, raising his hands. “Now… we’re all good friends here, are we not?”

Eloise, Colin, Hyacinth and Gregory all looked at you with expectant brows and you couldn’t help but let out a laugh. “I’d say… on him!”

Benedict made a choked noise in his throat and grabbed his chest to convey the amount of betrayal he felt. “You too, Brutus?” But he winked at you and he was already laughing at his siblings’ antics before anyone of the others had come near to touching him. With a loud war cry they wrestled him onto the sheets and proceeded to tickle him wherever they could reach. Eloise was expertly subduing his knees to spidery tickles, while Hyacinth squeezed his legs and Gregory and Colin dug their hands into all the open spots on his upper body. Benedict had probably not known how hard he could laugh, but it was highly infectious and forced you all to chuckle alongside him. You put an end to their attack rather quickly and tried to wrap your arms around them all at the same time to pull them all into a big hug.

No matter what fears sometimes kept you gnawing at the end of your pencil as you wrote into your books, nothing was greater a remedy to your anxiety than the family you had. And when Benedict pulled you into his arms, still warm from laughing, you weren’t scared of a thing in the world.

#bridgerton hurt/comfort #ticklish!benedict bridgerton #benedict bridgerton x (y/n)#bridgerton imagine #bridgerton tickling #gang tickling #bridgerton siblings #bridgerton (y/n)#benedict bridgerton imagine #bridgerton fanfic #bridgerton tickle fanfic #tickle fanfic #hurt/comfort

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