#moreso so i can make items for myself

[c0rpseductor]

i have like 747k gil in ffxiv savings which is not a lot given i think most people get into the millions but is a lot for me, i think it’s more than i’ve ever had at one time

[why-animals-do-the-thing]

I don’t currently own a cat but in the future it’s a goal of mine. Despite not having one right now, I still try to prepare myself for being a parent sometimes by reading about cat care and such lol. Anyways, I know there are some cats that will chew on or even eat things that are definitely not food and I’m so worried my future cat will have this problem since it would likely be one of the more “dog like” breeds that exhibit strange behaviors. I’ve read about Devon Rexes eating weird shit they shouldn’t… the point is, got any advice on how to train them not to do that stuff from a young age? I want to make sure for their safety they won’t do that (ykno even tho the cat is hypothetical atm) Thanks!

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, or whatever the real saying is.

Basically: if you're worried about them chewing on things, set up your space proactively so they can't chew on things that are major health hazards. Remove any toxic plants from the house entirely, secure electrical cords where they can't be reached or put them inside of something that can't be bitten through.

After you've done as much prevention as you can, you really basically just have to work with the cat in front of you. Notice that they like chewing on things? Give them plenty of appropriate options in the form of toys or other enrichment, and make the specific thing you don't want them to chew available.

Kittens, moreso than adults, are going to investigate things with their mouths. And the biggest thing with babies is to not let them practice behaviors you don't want them to do is adults. So if you're getting littles (since you said from a young age), monitor them closely, remove inappropriate items before they can even learn they're fun to chew, and provide appropriate things to gnaw on if they seem to want to chew things. One good thing you can do with a new cat, if you're worried, is keep them confined to one safe room while you learn their behavior, and then allow them more access to the house once you know them better.

There are deterrent sprays like bitter apple that you can put on stuff they're trying to chew, but that should really be something you only try after everything else. If you have to resort to deterrent sprays, you're in a situation where you have to be hyper-vigilant to make sure it's on everything, and there's a lot of room for error (and some animals don't care!).

But here's the thing: at the end of the day, you have to work with the cat in front of you. You can discourage certain actions, but for something self-reinforcing like chewing, you're not necessarily going to be able to train any animal completely out of the behavior. It's natural for them! So I'd suggest maybe reframing the question as "how do I plan to manage this behavior if/when it occurs" not "how do I prevent this from ever happening."

[lunarlegend]

what IS a better word for "projecting"? or can it ever be used in a different context?

(this is just me rambling to myself, lol)

i think of "projecting" as "empathizing with" or "deeply relating to", but it really means "placing one's issues on", and i don't know of a better word to replace it with.

like i guess i could say i do literally project on Ignis in SOME ways. i decided he's autistic because i am, lol. or rather, i like to draw attention to the things he does that make it seem like he COULD be autistic, when normally they probably just come across as character quirks. Ignis not understanding humor, rarely smiling, getting really attached to his comfort items, playing solitaire in group settings, needing order to function, etc. all of these are actual, factual things he does in canon, but nothing in canon says "this man is autistic". however, -i- am autistic, so i say he is, too.

same with his sexuality. there are many hints that Ignis could be ace: he is never seen showing any sexual interest in anyone, does not ever 'settle down' with anyone in canon, or express any interest in having kids, etc. could be because of his job! could be there is something going on offscreen and we just don't know! (he also chose the ace flag colors for his Crownsguard Fatigues, but that could just be a coincidence, after all). however, -i-, an ace person, see all that, and i say "oh hell yeah, this guy is asexual."

is that projection? i guess technically yeah, but i don't dislike my autism or my asexuality. i'm proud of them actually, and i like the idea of my comfort character sharing those qualities with me. especially when there is so much in canon to support the idea that he could.

emotionally, it's more about empathizing, i think. i find Ignis really relatable in a lot of ways, and he's also someone i would want to learn from. i admire him. his feelings matter the most to me; it's always his reactions i'm considering first, and his perspective that sits longest in my brain. i naturally gravitate to his mindset in any given situation i could put him in...i want to know what he thinks, moreso than any other character.

one of the ways i relate to him is his trauma. i also suffered emotional neglect throughout my childhood and adolescence, and i also have an emotional disconnect from my parents as a result. i also tend to cope by isolating and doing everything myself. much of Ignis' trauma gets glossed over in canon in favor of the larger story, so once again, i like to draw attention to it. why? because it resonates with me. and just like with the more fun aspects of Ignis that i highlight, there is plenty of canon evidence for it, it's just never outright discussed.

so i guess when i say "projecting", what i mean is, "focusing on aspects of his character that stand out to me because i personally relate to them". things that others maybe wouldn't notice, or might ignore in favor of something else, matter more to me because i do them too, and that's part of what makes Ignis my comfort character.

the power of recognizing yourself through your blorbo and wanting good things for him, which in turn makes you want good things for yourself. that's actually self care, i think.

[sunleaf-sims]

pancakes headcanon yap

eliza is often seen as kind of a nuisance i think, or the “problem” in the pancakes relationship., the agressor, maybe. im not really a fan of the angle that shes just this complainy wife, or that bob just sux butt. i personally think that bob and eliza are an undiagnosed adhd & autism couple. (as an audhd person with a neurodivergent family myself LOL)

in my game, a lot of their problems from “conflicting”traits (as the game puts it) are maybe moreso from them not having realized that theyre neurodivergent, each have specific triggers & needs they cant bend on, and thus not knowing a healthy way to manage things respectfully for another (at the start of the game) 😭

in my game eliza isnt necessarily naggy, but rather calls out bob on unfulfilled promises or chores that he volunteered to do or agreed on. She likes things to be clean and organized, otherwise its very stressful for her, he doesnt really notice the mess. she doesnt „make“ bob do anything, its moreso that bob keeps misjudging his own energy levels and what he can and cant handle and he quickly promises things he cant deliver on 😭 (been there)

eliza is materialistic in the sense that she likes particular things and collecting. shes an artist in my game and loves paintings and vintage items and collecting them! she can come off as a snob because she likes to yap about her favourite painters, techniques, etc.

Bob isnt lazy, hes overwhelmed by his job the second he comes home and loves gaming or going out on hikes or weekend trips to decompress! He struggles with depression because of the constant exhaustion. -

so at the start of the game, the two of them wind up in fights, often. bob wants to help and over promises, doesnt deliver, eliza comes home having relied on him but being faced with unfulfilled promises. he says hell do the bills, forgets to, their power gets shut off. hell hang up the laundry, doesnt, it goes sour. he forgets to clean up after himself, etc

on the flipside, eliza doesnt realize shes constantly teetering on overworked and keeps having mini meltdowns over even small things. shes not good at taking time to herself and knowing how to relax, and easily misreads bob playing video games to stim and stress relieve as him not caring/it being the reason for him neglecting what he promised. so she gets upset and sad, and she wuestions him on the situation, genuinely not understanding why things keep turning out this way

but in her asking question after question, she doesnt realize that it can come off hostile or make him feel ashamed and defensive.

they got pregnant with twins on accident, which put more strain on them because eliza noticed it late, not giving her much time to really thing about everything. they talk about it and decide to have the babies, maybe in a bit of a misguided bid thinking it could fix things in the way you often see these things portrayed.

during the pregnancy theres some friction, eliza reads everything she can about parenting, over preparing herself for everything she can think of and stressing herself out even more. bob tries to calm her but she assumes hes not taking it seriously. hes just a more in the moment person, saying they can always look i to things when the babies are here, you only prepare for so much… he tries.

Emilio & Amelie are born(they had twins in my game) and things only get more stressful. babies are loud, and needy, and theyre already a lot for any person, let alone parents with sensitivities. Eliza struggles when she cant sleep the way she always does, especially when she gets too little sleep- it really messes her up. the two of them are going through it but bob actually comes through with the Panicmode management

he does the nightshift of looking after the babies, he preps things, he juggles it, somehow. (cause of the imminent need and panic of it all)

eliza can recharge, the two of them work it, somehow. they are more quiet with each other, in that they actually dont see each other that much or talk that much- but at least theres no fight. bob doesnt know if hes appreciated for what hes doing, cause elizais so stressed she forgets to vocalize it. he doesnt complain, he just retreats… and she doesnt notice. they sleep in seperate rooms because at this point they are both almost a but..awkward. theyre worried that striking up conversation will cause fights to come back, so they just dont. „for the kids“.

at one point at the doctors, with the toddlers, the doctor notice some things with the kids. adhd is mentioned. bob is fidgeting and eliza is focused. its a rocky little road but.. through their kids they both get their diagnoses. bob first. and through eliza researching adhd for her babies and bob, finds out about autism- shes too scared to get her diagnose, but she has a hunch and reads up a lot.

they end up going to councelling. its a slow process but the more they learn the more they realize. some of their issues are avoidable, some of the things that came off malicious never were. they still do love each other and its what made everything so hard, not knowing why it didnt work despite love. now they try things out, new approaches.

but they also realize that they both kind of like having their own time and space and as they learn to listen to themselves and their needs they decide rent apartments across from another, instead of living in a house together. the kids are children now and they get to stay with either of them whenever they want, having rooms in both houses.

a lot of days one stays over at the others place, or they meet for breakfast, dinner, lunch. even though they live in seperate apartments, they spend more time together than before. and more *quality* time. each of them have their own space to heed their needs. maybe one day theyll move in together again, but for now this works for them! (also bob has a maid to help him in his apartment, for now!) Bob also gets on meds (antidepressants, ADHD meds to try) and hits helping him a lot already too. the jury is still out in wether or not they are “husband & wife” style in love, or just deeply platonicically love another as family. but i dont think it matters all that much, because theyre finding their way and itll be ok 🥺🧡

[doberbutts]

This conversation makes me more and more wishing I lived in a country where protective items were legal - not even pepper spray is legal here. We mostly have blade crimes, I live in a rough area, thus far my big, protective dog has been enough to ward people off but I wish there was more legal options. If a dog (on its own accord, not ordered to) bites someone to defend the owner here, it’s a real hazy area legally, however but generally looked at better than if you had spray or a weapon. Sorry not much to add, venting a little, a very interesting conversation to read

I know people from other countries look at Americans as gun-obsessed and mock us for it, but this is the conversation I see brought up every time there is an honest discussion of why an American may need to carry a weapon for their own protection. Unfortunately living in a high crime area where there is a lot of violent crime is common enough that people need the reassurance of having something in their pocket or strapped to their hip that will help them out of a tough situation. Cops are useless even moreso than usual in these areas and politicians don't care unless they can use these areas as talking points for debates. So it is up to us to defend ourselves from harm.

I bought my first weapon and attended self defense classes to learn how to use it when I moved out, because I moved into a higher crime area (only place with rent I could afford at 18) and I was walking home after class or work often very late at night (11pm-3am) and several of my classmates who lived nearby had been attacked doing the same thing. Being visibly queer, ambiguously gendered, blatantly young and black, hauling expensive art supplies everywhere I went, I knew there was a target on my back and I was not willing to become a statistic.

I was followed. I was confronted. The last couple months of my time at my first apartment someone tried to break in through my fire escape almost nightly, which is why I moved and immediately got a doberman and some roommates. But it's also why I armed myself and made sure I did my best to learn what to do in a fight.

I saw this post that was like "Americans buy guns saying they need protection and I wonder how they'll pay for the hospital when they accidentally injure themselves" and it bothered me so much. The Americans that need to arm themselves for protection aren't the ones at fault for our backwardsass healthcare system. If anything they're also the ones who the healthcare system fucks over the worst. Self-inflicted gun-related injuries are preventable with gun safety but some asshole killing or raping you in the street is a reality for our most marginalized populations and we deserve the ability to protect ourselves from this.

[desiresign]

when i said i was writing tojinyan fanfiction to cure me i ended up reading 81 pages of the tao te ching as annotated by seiga because a quirky joke visual novel fangame has that.

^ actually, im going to think about this when i see flowers now.

giving value to items is what makes them desired by thieves, i do have a large attachment to material objects, not out of vanity or to be prideful in what others dont have, but moreso because i love to collect things and have a hard time letting things go. my items mean things to me, that they do not mean to other people. by putting them on a higher pedestal, than the reality, it can make things in life become far more devestating to deal with. even if its not thievery, things like an object breaking or being unsalvagable can happen.

...

ok the seiga annotations thing like yeah kind of funny silly but its also helping me get more of a grasp on things being said (not that its blindly follow duh) because well i like metaphors and prose and stuff in short poetry but usually i cant always grasp what is being said myself so its kind of helpful

that being said im going to look into it more. ya know sources that arent a 1 dollar touhou vn.

i feel smart

[regi572]

Had an very bizarre vivid dream this morning, which is probably going to read like a mad conspiracy theory, but the more I thought about it, the more entertaining it was. I am not reading into this at all, moreso shocked I dreamt this all myself lol.

So this entire dream started with the idea of somebody in the dream asking if aliens were always here, or just recently here, and they function more or less like us in terms of mental capacity, however they exist on a higher dimension, so we only ever get hints of them when they pass through our dimmension either intentionally or unintentionally.

------

(Additional background) So I guess the idea of this stemmed from a video I watched months back about some dude who conceptionally made a 4D version of minecraft where the greater idea is that 4D entities would have total visibilty of the entirety of our 3D dimmension, but then can see every other parallel 3D dimmension adjacent to ours and can travel freely between them.

And I was also going down the SCP wiki rabbit hole back in 2021, so there are instances where things could exist that technically are 4D objects, but have different properties if you can pass through them (like say there is a 4D tunnel, it might give you the ability to pass through 4D space and spit you out on the other side, but the properties are all out of wack when you are inside, and when you are outside, it just looks like a hole in the wall or something)

------

So the dream starts in a near future where things have all of a suddon become so automated to the point, that we kinda just exist in this distopian future of living in your home, but you never leave because all media and sustinance are provided for you. For example, your fridge and pantry are always restocked, and you have ready access to connect with anyone you know through some for of media chamber where you can directly interact with a friends avatar (kinda similar to vrchat, but more directly linked. I guess like VR chat meets the SAO neurolink)

However something odd changes in your habitat.. You notice that occasionally your fridge is not stocked correctly (you can submit a support ticket, and usually it is remediated by the next day). Occassionally while you are walking around your habitat, you bump into what feels like another person sometimes, but there is never really anything there. You try to bump into that object again, but it just seems to not be there at all so you start to ignore it. But it keeps happening more and more frequently, and when you bring it up to your friends, they begin to think you are going crazy. "There is clearly nothing there, are you sure you aren't just losing your mind or something?"

--- Perspective shifts to third person ---

The world zooms out to what appears to be what can best be described as an ants nest enclosure. You look around and there appears to be an entire organization of individuals monitoring and interacting with these ant habitats. Kinda like a lab, but not(?). As you look closer at the habitiat in front of you, you see what is a projected interpretation of your own living space. An individual appears to be responsible for providing nutrition, pulling trash out of the habbitat, and linking the "media" room with mutltiple other habitats. Turns out, these individuals are observing and caring for this distopian lifestyle, as for the humans in the habitats, they cannot see outside of their dimmension. But these individuals can see everything.

Your 'caretaker' starts going rogue however. After what was initially an accident, they noticed that they can start planting higher dimmensional objects where they shouldn't be. At one point, they add an item to the habbitat, that when the human walks into it, it pulls them through a long tunnel structure outside of their dimmension, essentially making them fall for what feels like 10x the lenght of what they can visibly see of the tunnel.

--- Perspective shifts back to first person of the human ---

After numerous encounters, your reality feels like it is falling apart. Tunnels that make 0 sense. It feels like someone is intentionally putting objects in your way so you hit them, but you can never see them, and you can never find them again.

Occasionally you feel someone actually tapping on your face and shoulder. But at one point, as you are starting to mentally break down from not understanding what is happening, something is tapping on your nose repeatedly. You shout "Listen I know you are fucking with my nose, would you please fucking stop!?"

--- Perspective shifts back to third person ---

You see the entity with their "hand" in your habitat. A guard walks up to them.

.... And that's when I woke up this morning. lol

[hashirun]

I know you're busy po and I really wanna ask you about tips for organizing an event just like what you did recently. Yes, I'm a Caviteño and I fell in love with your blog esp about running! You're an inspiration po. Nvm this ask po if you're not interested but please please pleaaasee message me po because I need help organizing an event. Thank you po if you read this message : )

Hello! I'm thrilled to know you enjoy my blog especially my posts about running. Running is one of my life passions and aside from the high I get from a good workout, there is also this sense of fulfillment I get from being able share my passion with other people. That said, I don't feel like I'm qualified to dish out tips on organizing events. It was a spur of the moment decision and ultimately my partner and I decided to postpone it so as of this moment I still lack the requisite EXP points to call myself an event organizer.. but I'll do my best to share what I've learned so far.

I'm sharing insights from the perspective of organizing a sports event, I'm not really sure how it'll fit if you're planning to hold a different type of event but I hope this helps nonetheless. So let's say you already have a type of event in mind.

1. Define your objectives. Why do you want to organize the event? What do you wish to achieve by organizing the event? Be sure you and your event partner(s) have the same objectives otherwise you'll have a hard time working together if you don't see eye to eye in terms of the direction you wish to take.

2. Brainstorming - this is when you and your event partner(s) throw around ideas on what you want to see in your event. Try to come up with as many ideas as you can. List down everything and don't dismiss anything yet. From there, identify the good ones and see if there's any way you can make them work together, or if you need to trim down some more until you arrive at the best ideas(s) for your event.

3. Picking the date of your event. This is important as this will determine how much time you have to prepare. Based on my experience, you need to give yourself as much time as possible, moreso if this is your first time organizing an event. I did my research and found that it usually takes 3-6 months to organize a sports event, but my event partner insisted that we hold it in 2 months time. We eventually pushed it back by 2 more weeks but even that wasn't enough. So we postponed it yet again. This brings us back to my first tip of making sure you and your partner(s) are working towards the same objectives because I guarantee you that this is how a lot of challenges will arise in the process.

4. Lay down the particulars: venue, budget, costing, suppliers, logistics, sponsorships, marketing strategies. Create a timeline and make sure your targets are met within schedule.

5. Venue and suppliers. These will determine your costing. For our event, I had to contact various suppliers (from dri-fit shirts to medals to trophies, the list goes on) to get the best deals. The costing mainly determines the next item:

6. Budget. You need to secure the budget first. Where will it initially come from? From your own pocket? From sponsors? If from sponsors, prepare a list of possible sponsors, and prepare a well-written sponsorship letter to send to your prospects. If you don't have the budget yet, then this brings us back to my third tip which is picking the date of the event. You may want to hold the event at a much, much later time if you're going to work on securing the budget first. Be sure that the time you allot to raising funds won't eat up much time from the actual time allotted to prepare for the event.

7. Logistics. This involves identifying and securing your manpower, as well as coordinating with your local government units for the necessary permits. If it's a sports event, be sure to include in your manpower the race officials, race marshalls, traffic marshalls, medics. Also, carefully plan the flow of the event itself.

8. Marketing. Social media is definitely the way to go. Be sure to join groups that cater to the type of event you're holding so you can promote your event. Run sponsored ads (which needs budget). Be consistent in posting about the event on your page. Partner up with influencers to promote your event. Offer discounts and promos to encourage sign ups. You'll need time to gain traction, which brings us back to my third tip.

You see, everything ties together. Organizing an event is no easy feat. It takes careful planning, as well as the resolve to go through with your plan. You must be up to the task, and I realized along the way that I wasn't up for it yet. Hope this answer helps. If you have any additional questions don't hesitate to reach out. Good luck!

[basil-touche]

27, 61, and 57 for the unusual asks!!

27. Do you have a job? What do you do?

I work in a discount shop as a part-time supervisor. Been doing it for about 4 years now (although covid meant I was in and out of isolation for my own safety for about a year so it doesn't quite feel that long). It's pretty decent in regards to it being a retail environment. It's part of a chain but it's in a garden centre a little way out of my hometown and I think that's what makes it better than my last job (which was not great to put it mildly). It just feels a bit more laid back than being on a high street and a lot of the routine maintence is on the GC itself to sort out, so there's less to worry about on that front.

The shop sells a range of items, kids toys & books, books for adults, craft, stationery etc. I also get 25% off most stock as well (sometimes they do 50% off events for staff which is super useful when it comes to present buying or stocking up on art supplies) and I bought a lot of the supplies for craft projects I post on here from work.

It's not a job I want to do forever. Now that I've recovered from my teenage years (those few years were fucking awful) I'm learning to drive (just bought my first car today!) and once I've passed I'm thinking of going back to college. Thinking about what I actually want to do in this life. I'm really into reading atm and have the urge to write as well as recently getting back into art. So history, english and art seem like possible paths to take, but there's no rushing these things.

57. Do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? 

As a kid I used to get really annoyed with my Mum when she would take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels we would stay at. I thought she was stealing them. Wasn't until I was older that I learned that hotel staff will just throw away all the bottles, regardless whether or not they had been used. I think it's kinda a legal requirement to keep things sanitary? Kinda like how in resturants, you get given a knife & fork for your meal, they still wash your knife even if you never touched it. Better to be safe than sorry (or sued, I suppose).

So to actually answer the question, yes I do now. It's rather useful to have them for the next time I'm on holiday. And I'd rather not cause unnecessary waste.

61. Have you ever peed in the woods? 

A couple of times, yes. Moreso as a kid. Surprising, when I go on my longer walks in the summer, sometimes travelling 10 miles in a day, I never feel the need to relieve myself. I guess because my body is using all my energy during the hike. I can't actually remember the last time I peed in the woods (and quite honestly, I prefer to use an actual toliet if I can help it).

[sunlitmcgee]

What types of foods do americans have?

Okay anon. I will admit that our original* dishes aren't the healthiest. Most American meals are based less around health and moreso around feel good comfort. Things like burgers and hot dogs are rightfully staples of typical American dining, but mostly in the sense that they're commercialized bits of our culture, such as with Big Macs and Woopers in fast food-type eating, and hot dogs being staples at any major sports game(mostly because they're eaten with your hands while you sit in your seat, just like popcorn at a movie theater).

Another big thing is our diners! Diners. We fucking love them. Pancakes, toast, anything to do with eggs. You think American Dining and you should think of retro red booths and neon lights and checkerboard tiles. And milkshakes! fucking LOVE fries with a milkshake. you can dip them into the cream! it is very very good. not healthy for your body, but good for your soul. You will find this is the core idea at the center of most American foods.

AAAAAAaaaand cook outs. America is known for its(white-centric, upper class, nuclear family, often times always co-opted by fascists who fetishize the concept of some mythical elusive "better ''before time''") ideal suburbia, and that includes the idea of calling over the family and your neighbors to fire up the grill. Corn on the cob, chicken, steak, veggies. If it can go on the grill, it can cook just fine. Bonus points if you have some manner of fire pit. Cook up them hot dogs. Impale those puppies. On a Stick. Wowo!

and then ofc you have microwave dinners and the such you'll find in the frozen food aisle of any food-stuff store. never had one myself so I can't comment on what's in them, but they're very good for people who can't muster the energy to cook a full thing, so again, convince and comfort is the rule.

I should say, all of this is from the perspective of someone who was raised right on the tip of the South in the mostly pasty white Midwest. Specifically as someone whose family has long straddled the poverty line and has only relatively recently been able to afford a greater sense of financial comfort. I don't think I need to go on a whole ramble about how different levels of economic class can impact the way someone gets their meals.

The US is huge. Fucking massive. There are so many differences in things between state and state, and my understanding of how culture relates to food here and vise verse is limited. But I hope that this maybe gave you an idea of WHY we have such a focus on certain food items that often gets(rightfully) poked fun at by the rest of the world. It's a mix of comfort and family and consumerism. Truly, that is the American Way.

you should make fun of us for wrapping everything in bacon tho, idfk whose idea that was,but it's fucking wrong

*original meaning our take on the meal, not that we invented it. something something all cultures have taken from each other throughout human history, there's no such thing as a completely original idea, etc etc, you get what I mean. No one nation owns the idea of putting a cooked hunk of beef between two pieces of bread.

[thalassophobixodius]

idea to make a realm for practice shifting/fixing the biggest issue I have with shifting; the first thing I want to figure out in the world is pretty much giving myself access to a less OP (ex; not just one thing that I can access it with, moreso like accessing different parts of it with different items like in ACNH) but way more customizable and infinite. Only I can use it preferably to avoid paradox (because :D paranoia!! Idk if causing a paradox is possible with shifting but like!! Paranoid AF and want to take this slow and be careful, we've only ever shifted to vague random areas to escape painful situations, never anything legit DR related) but if I trust someone I find in this alternate world, I can give them a smidge of the power or limited access/perms somehow.

Aswell as a starting spawnpoint home that has immediate access to a small beach side civilization and immediate access to the ocean (the main world is the ocean itself, that is much more fleshed out)

Have never fully shifted before, so :x have been daydreaming/pinboarding a LOT about the world to make sure I can remember and imagine it properly anytime I try to do so (bcs we also have difficulty with imagery in our head 🥲 sometimes it can be very vivid in lucky moments but usually vry difficult and odd)

[memorymessage]

i think i just bullied my grandma into giving me my first purse, and i feel kinda bad...

when i was younger, during the ~scene era~ i was obsessed with bags, because of my idols-

-always carrying big fuck-off bags and being accessory maximalists.

so, for awhile i did have a bag collection:

(there's two harajuku lovers bags in the first pic + one cocolulu bag, and a random one probably from zumiez, or somwhere idfk, all buried in the bed of chaos((literal bed of chaos)) (((not dark souls))))

but not only did i never use them, i don't know if i would call them purses, either. they were usually oversized weekender bags, messenger bags, or duffels/mini duffels. i think the unbranded plaid one in the first pic is the closest i would come to calling a purse.

then, i started getting into minimalism, which only made me hate the idea of purses more, and also made me dislike all the bags i currently had.

i began only carrying cheap fabric totes, such as:

and that was only if i absolutely had to take a bag with me, because otherwise i would only take my lovely big ol' sweater wallet:

rest in peace, sweater wallet. you carried so many coins for my broke ass.

then, after i transitioned as masc, i bought myself a trifold wallet. which has been my wallet for near 10 years now.

i bought this wallet when i was super into ~streetwear~, and it hasn't been my style anymore for many years. i just haven't felt the need to buy a new one because i just don't really give a fuck atp. if i did buy a new wallet, i'd probably get another leather trifold, just without the very... obnoxious streetwear stylization this one has.

here he is, all these years later. it is very aptly captioned 'durable goods'... for however obnoxiously stylized that captioning is, it is accurate!

a few years ago, i got my first 'default' bag. you know, the one that stores all the essentials: hand sanitizer, chapstick, spare change, keys, etc. (you can see where my priorities lie in the things that came to my mind first when listing items. this dingus doesn't drive and isn't the carrier of the keys. and is also broke), one that you can grab and go out of the house with.

me luvly mum got it for me for christmas:

obviously, it's still very much a backpack, and a themed backpack at that.

i think i've always associated the more classic looking purse with femininity and womanhood—being an adult woman. two things i have spent the majority of my life avoiding.

the last year, i have been leisurely entertaining the idea of buying my first purse. mostly because i encountered the first purse i ever truly liked. it was my cousin's purse—a very floppy black leather mid-size purse. like a hybrid of a fabric tote with a purse.

AND YESTERDAY

i come down the fucking stairs of my house

and see

that my grandma

has my cousin's old purse

and i just-

gimme that bag

GIMME THAT BAG

of course, i'm being dramatic by saying i bullied her into giving it to me. all she said was 'oh, i got it from your aunt, you can have it, idc.'

but still, i do not like asking people for things, even if it's something they don't want or don't care about. i still don't like...receiving things. it makes me uncomfortable. i didn't really expect her to give it to me, i moreso was saying 'gimme dat' as a meme.

AND NOW I DON'T EVEN KNOW IF I WANT IT. because it has holes and it's really dirty. so i might just give it back to my grandma, because she was planning on using it, too

WHAT DO I DO WITH HER:

SHE IS SO DIRTY

i've been trying to find a bag like this for MONTHS, but so far no luck! should i try to restore it? the inside is absolutely torn apart

[everydaydg]

So far, MadWorld is so good but a thought keeps peeking into my head the more I play.

The narrative is cool, the visuals are great, the combat has some oomph to it, that good impact; the music is great and the "over the top" violence is really well executed

But... this doesnt feel right on the Wii...

And I dont mean it in a "The wii is a family console, so violent video games dont work on it" kind of way, I feel that is an insult to all the M rated games/series on the system (Like Resident Evil, Project Zero, NMH, Dead Space Extraction and so on), but moreso in a... this doesnt feel right because of the limitations and quirks of the wii

The visuals are fantastic, the black and white comicbook look is something ive never seen done again after this and the choise to make the only other color red to emphasise blood? brilliant!

... but you're doing this on the Wii... a console that outputs at 480p and most consumers will use at 480i because they might not have a display capable of outputting at a high resolution or the right cables...

Which leads to a game that is ... quite confusing to look at sometimes, telling depth is a constant struggle for me due to the limited pallete.

When running it on dolphin I find myself having a way easier time making out depth (its still a bit hard to look at sometimes, skill issue on my behalf).

seeing how a higher resolution does help out a ton... I wonder why they never considered doing a port to the PS3 with all the benefits that would have brought like: HD, PS Move support (if you want the waggle funny business) a more solid framerate on some areas

It prolly would have been the best way to experience the game!

... oh I havent written a word about the waggle funny business have I. Who mentions the fucking PS Move before bringing up the wiimote- ah well

So, the controls! They work pretty well! A being the main attack is fun, swinging the remote for uppers or back handed attacks is a blast and the chainsaw is real fun! ... but theres a few limitations

Grabbing being mapped to A leads to grabbing things feeling slightly unreliable, the lack of a second analog stick makes it so the camera is a little jank, specially locking on to enemies; using the nunchuck's motion controls to dodge is not my preffered way of doing it, I find it to be a bit of an unreliable option for such an important tool in the game

And this shoudnt be a huge problem, they could have taken the NMH aproach of mapping it to the dpad or mapping it to Z... but they mapped jump to Z... I dont believe ill be doin any mayor platforming so why make a dedicated button to this instead of dodging????? Why not map it to the nunchuck's waggle????

Why map up on the dpad to pick up items... why cant it be A??

Why is + completely unused?! TAUNT CAN BE IN + MAN

in fact why the fuck is minus the pause button-

Why are 1 and 2 completely unused and why cant they be used for weapon switching in order to free the dpad or do something else... what is this fucking control scheme-

I know the wiimote is limited but why do it like this...

I have my issues... the game is good... but I feel bad seeing how its stuck on the wii with no other options outside of emulation... its stuck with these issues and I can see an all time classic thats stuck in the wrong place

[greenjokwe-blog]

Planescape: Torment - Finished 31/08/2023

I'll be perfectly honest, 2023 gaming for me has not been my best year. That has nothing to do with the games that have come out though, moreso that all the games that I have played this year aside from a couple have mostly pailed in comparison to what I played in 2022. In fact, I'll be the first to admit that from what I can tell, the games that have actually come out this year have been nothing short of phenomenal, with a ton of groundbreaking games all coming out very short of each other. That being said, my backlog is just waaaay too massive right now, so when Baldur's Gate 3 was about to come out to wide acclaim, I tried looking through games that I could take out before I would be able to in good mind get myself to buy it. The first of which immediately came the old CRPG DND games, which after playing around in a ton of RTS games for a bit seemed like a perfect way to test my old game limit. It eventually lead me to Planescape: Torment, a game for the longest time I had heard was one of the greatest games ever made, so I decided to give it a try, letting myself know I could quit at any point, and... Wow. Woah. It's not that I didn't believe in it it's just... God damn.

I should say that technically, Planescape Torment was my second game on my CRPG adventure since I technically started with playing the first Baldur's Gate. A game that I did not get very far in mind you, but not out of any particular distain! In fact, there were parts of that game that I really enjoyed. Honestly, seeing a game like that so ambitiously and elegantly attempt to mimic the experience of a single-player DnD session was fascinating for me (even though I've never finished a full campaign with friends), which works wonders considering not only the fact that a ton of modern-day RPG's are influenced by this title in particular, but the foundation of all RPG's basically coming directly from the stats and campaigns told in the advanced Forgotten Realms worlds. It put the entire genre in a context for me that's only really been matched by Dragon Quest V in terms of its benefits and how so many of what we consider the genre's antiquities were originally used, and how to use them in ways that complement the games themselves and make them interesting design-wise. Unfortunately, that interest only brought me so far, as the constant save-scumming that I did to myself just to experience in-game scenarios that didn't particularly interest me, with my first real interaction with pause/play combat wore me out, and lead to me dropping the game after only a few hours.

I will say though, that I am extremely glad that I started that game before starting Planescape, as it absolutely helped me out with my experience here. Knowing how to traverse the menu system, the pause combat, the character management, amongst other things went a long way in helping me understand the game, which was likely needed as one of the game's biggest issues is definitely how obtuse and archaic it can be at the best of times. The obvious main complaint that everyone will go to first is the combat, which even for an 1999 RPG, isn't particularly stellar, and usually cycles from mind-numbingly simple to extreme tedium and confusion. That along with poor item management and a ton of glitches no matter which version of the game you play leads to the game being a hard revisit for many a player, and all aspects have been improved with later RPG's, however the number of titles it manages to predate with it's ambition, also the fact that there are slight workarounds and ways to avoid most issues with reasonable planning make it somewhat forgivable, so you can actually get through to the main game's role playing and story.

And holy hell, what a story it is. The way the game manages to work it's incredibly investing, multi-faction, multi-belief world of the afterlife and multiverse in it's Planescape setting, along with the mainline writing of the subversive and beautiful CRPG character-driven experience that plays with tropes and archetypes that can only really be matched by Love-de-Lic's moon in terms of total scale (although both have very different influences and go in very different direction with their playing of expectations!). The central mystery of the game, focusing on the main character and his identity, in conjunction with the extremely deep dialogue options of every single named NPC of Sigil, makes for perhaps the most wonderful story I've experienced in a game, with the involving nature and the great dramatic scale of the best DnD campaigns, and the intrinsic value and general structure of Black Isle's other series, Fallout, which the game is based on more than anything else.

There are so many little nitty gritty details I could get into about this game that made me fall in love with it initially, talking to the characters and finding out about the game's first faction, going through the side quests without an extra thought because I was genuinely intrigued about how things would resolve, the fact that half of the main playable cast in the game is up there as the best party members in any RPG I've played. There is a LOT to cover, and it's all down to the game's excellent writing and its smart way of kiting you along, while still being fairly linear compared to other CRPG's the game itself never really doubts the player and always makes the multitude of options feel gratifying even if there's not that much choice. Granted, not all of the game's interactions are this simple, and in fact there are definitely some quests and different parts of the game that require a bit much of you to figure out yourself. It's what reluctantly makes me say that this game will likely be a Guide Game for the vast majority of players, because although I'd love to recommend multiple playthroughs for this game to get the most out of it, if you're like me and want to see as much as they can in one go, or you're as dumb as me when it comes to the mainline fetch-puzzles cuz you didn't pay quite enough attention to one NPC, you're probably gonna need to be Walkthroughed to experience the most of what this game has to offer. Don't worry, trust me, it's worth it, the payoffs in this game are great.

... Okay, maybe not all of the payoffs. In more ways than the ones already mentioned, there are a lot of obvious tellings of this game's issues that were fairly rushed before release, but this issue really starts to ire once you leave Sigil. Let it be known that the way that Sigil breadcrumbs you through everything, and allows players to figure the compelling world out for themselves and all of that stellar game design, essentially doesn't exist when you get to the area Curst. Extremely insular in scope, a reliance on classical RPG job board-esque quests, an overreliance on the combat which at this point was easily skipped, generally poor design with selections of items and resting points... It's not a pretty site, and by the time you get to the Prison section where you'll likely be picking off one enemy at a time ad nauseam until you clear out every single room... It feels extremely rushed and uncared for compared to the rest of the game, which is a shame as the game starts finally picking up again once you get to the last area, where the game finishes very, VERY strong and leaves a perfectly satisfying conclusion while leaving you guessing and thinking for all the while longer.

But, out of everything, out of all of the issues and annoyances I had, I cannot begin to describe how absolutely enamoured by this game I was when first going through it. I've been trying to keep it brief but I could go on about how much I love Morte and Dak'kon (amongst the other party members), some of the individual quests that kept me investigating and thinking about what dialogue options to choose and where to go, trying to compartmentalize the whole world and it's factions/philosophies as much as possible in my brain without the need of the journal or writing things down. The voice acting, the visuals, the character design, the use of stats... god I could go on. It's a video game that, like many others, has affected me in a way not many other games have, and managed to get me not only interested in Dungeons and Dragons history, worlds, and lore but also got me back into reading books! That's probably one of the biggest compliments I could ever give a game, especially of Planescape's type. Absolutely worth the huge amount of love and devotion it's cult following has given it. Maybe not a universal recommendation (and hey, maybe with BG3's success a remake of this game may come out that actually isn't too bad. Weirder has happened.), but absolutely worth it if you're willing to give it a chance.

[mxstball]

"The fact that you just said that Yukin's probably fine with Nergal showing up to help with this without you wanting to shit yourself is concerning." Anyone that actively works well with Nergal is a red flag. No, Heidi's not an exception. She's been worried about her little sister for over a year.

Nonetheless, Heidi and Lauren listened to Hisao's tale. To think that there was another Hoopa going around... one that was directly imprisoned by the bottle and required trickery to switch places with them... that wasn't anything like the Hoopa that they shared a world with. Though, that Hoopa was a lot more childish than others so there's that.

Still, to think that a human could become a Legendary Pokémon... it was hard for either of them to fathom. Imagine if something happened to Zinnia or Kathy or Cynthia to make them Legendary Pokémon? It would be maddening to think about for them--

--and that's probably exactly why Lauren pulled out her Interstellar Dex and started writing this all down, including the quote. It was something that she'll have to think about for later, as even that may help with her research.

"I've... never been human myself but.... But I know what it's like -- to suddenly have everything change... to have everything that you knew -- or didn't know in my case -- changed and lost before your eyes. I don't talk much about it now, but back when I lived with Lauren and Lati in Morrigan's world, whenever I wasn't falling ill from Mega Evolution Rejection--"

"--wait, we're actually going with that name for the illness born from your Mega Evolution energy being incompatible with the world?"

"Yeah. I think it fits. Though, you always had a good ways with names." Heidi chuckled.

"Anyway, when I wasn't falling ill, I was constantly depressed. I was so obsessed with finding my past self that it ate me inside. I thought that maybe if I found who I once was that the Legendary Pokémon there would accept me... that maybe I can grow strong and challenge them for their respect... that I would be loved--" Heidi shook her head. "By that point, it was eating at me for 900 years. I thought I lost my sense of agency, sense of self, and even my future. Desperate, I tried to challenge Morrigan with my guns and inventions at the time. I wanted to show her that I could be useful... that I can help in my own way. I thought that if I could gain her favor then the hole in my heart would be healed.... I was wrong. She broke all of my items, beat me badly, and sent me back bloody and broken. Said that I'll never be one of hers with my 'cheap gimmicks'."

"...To be fair, you're not the only one to feel betrayed by Morrigan...."

Heidi immediately knew what Lauren was referring to, but decided to keep going.

"...when Lauren and Lati were away on a mission, they left me by myself, recovering from what Morrigan did to me. There, in Southern Island, I met someone. She appeared and helped me with my wounds, kindly talking with me and teaching me how to recover physically, but I was still a wreck emotionally. Long story short, we started dating, but it was moreso that I was in love with the idea of someone being there for me than her specifically, though she knew -- and knows -- that. She cared more about helping me than anything."

"..." Lauren turned to Heidi and glared a little. She knew exactly who this was talking about.

"During our time together, when I finally opened up about suffering, about how I felt so lost and forced to just... roll over and die.... She said something to me. 'Life at time may find you feeling that you have lost all agency. You become swept up in it. Even with the most amount of strength, you feel powerless as you become lost in the throes of forced action. However, as long as you remain true to yourself and act on the agency that you do have, then you will never lose yourself.' For a while, I didn't quite understand it, even after she and I broke up... but it stuck with me... and it wasn't until I was interacting with humans that I understood it. While humans do not have the luxury as us Legendary Pokémon, they use what ability they do have to make a life out of themselves... to find purpose and identity and community.... They found people that would lift them up and become better versions of themselves, whether it be another person, a Pokémon, or even a Legendary Pokémon... and they were happy -- well, not all of them but many of them were... many of the ones that I admired and got to know were. It... felt like an epiphany to me, so much so that it helped free me from my trauma and grow to love humans as much as I do today... and what inspires me to push for a better future."

"...." Wow. Did... Dinah really help to kick Heidi off on her recovery like that? She wasn't aware of that fact -- though maybe it had to do with how hostile about Dinah she gets....

"Anyway, I uh... kinda lost the overall point to this, but your story and your conclusion made me feel like I wished to share it with you to show that many of us struggle with our identity but that working towards being who we want to be in the present is the best way to overcome it." Heidi nodded.

"Pretty sure you don't have to ask Dad if it's okay for Nergal to help Hisao make that poison--Yukin's probably already given the go-ahead." Aesen remarked. Then again, he knew that Yukin tended to sign off on anything Nergal did when it came to him, so why would it be any different for Hisao?

Well, it would be different for Hisao because Hisao wasn't going to be dragged off for who-knows-what. Gene wouldn't allow it, due to Hisao's position.

Speaking of Hisao, he would sit in the chair opposite Aesen before turning to look at Heidi and Lauren. This was going to be a lengthy explanation.

"That is because of Gene's previous Hoopa--Athanase. He'd been locked in his Prison Bottle for being a completely unrepentant asshole, so when I arrived to help Kalos in their rebuilding efforts after AZ fired the Ultimate Weapon so long ago, I came across that Prison Bottle.

Athanase claimed that he was trapped in his Prison Bottle by a 'wicked human', and tricked me into wishing for his freedom. That little bastard deceived me and trapped me in that Prison Bottle instead while he escaped.I will tell you that being trapped in the Prison Bottle is a surefire way to lose your humanity, because it was how I lost mine.

Gene eventually came back to that Prison Bottle and let me out, but he was the one to drop the bad news about my lost humanity on me. I'll be the first to admit that I was at a loss for what to do with my life from that point... but I'm also someone of honor. Gene saved my life, so I'm in his debt. That's why I willingly became part of his Pantheon and help out when he asks things of me.

As for Athanase... Gene had supposedly killed the little cretin, but he somehow found a way to survive. That's why I want to deal with Morrigan's Hoopa personally--as a practice run for the day that I personally kill Athanase myself for what he did to me."

It was rare to hear Hisao speak with such conviction in his voice, but it was on full display here. To think that he had been through so much yet didn't let his misfortunes change his outlook much spoke volumes.

Of course, there was more that Hisao had to add, and it was something that could potentially resonate with Lauren and Heidi in terms of the overall subject matter--and it could even possibly resonate with little Lati as well.

"You know, after I became a Hoopa, I struggled a lot with my sense of identity--I'd spent so long being human that, the moment it was gone, I felt lost. Being human was all that I knew, so to suddenly become something else was jarring. But I heard something repeated to me a lot over the years after my training finished that stuck with me: 'you don't have to be human to be human'."

Well, that was definitely a powerful message, and Hisao was intent on clarifying.

"For the longest time, I couldn't grasp what that meant... but during a return trip to Kalos many centuries later, everything suddenly made sense. Just because something about your life changes doesn't mean that you should allow yourself to change because of it.

Sudden knowledge that you never had before, a shift in rank that you never planned for... none of that should be what changes what makes you 'you'. That has to be something that you change for yourself, outside influences be damned. So long as you keep a strong hold of the core of what makes you who you are as an individual--your personal values and beliefs, you can stand firm against whatever life decides to throw at you."

[elena-oc-blog]

round 2!

🌌 ✏️ 🌪️- Goop

👑 ❇️ 🔥 -Aurora

HI SO SORRY FOR THE LATE REPLY, I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO DRAG MYSELF TO MY LAPTOP UNTIL NOW Now onto the answers to your wonderful questions uwu 🌌 MILKY WAY - what was the inspiration behind your oc? what was the first thing you decided about them?

I created goop when I was still living at my dad's. I was working in my little studio room and I think some kids were being very loud outside? And it was giving me sensory overload so I doodled a very anxious crying dragon with big ears and colored it and that's how goop came to be! His most important features are his big pupiled crying eyes and long sensitive ears as noise is the thing im most sensitive to. He is basically my anxiety sona!

✏️ PENCIL - is there a particular quote / lyric that you associate with them?

Since he is a sona of sorts rather than a full on OC I don't really think about them a lot in that way. I moreso think of them any time I am experiencing a large amount of anxiety, emotional distress and/or sensory overload. Maybe "The world is a loud and scary place"? 🌪️ TORNADO - what is the biggest change you've ever made to them? how have they changed from their original version?

Well the first iteration of him is the image i added to the milkyway question. Since I was stressed (and also it was 2018) the art and main personality points are a bit rough. However with therapy and time I refined his personality a lot more. He enjoys nature (and its sounds) and being by himself, they don't like going out in the fcrowded city, they are an artist that prefers using traditional media. Basically he now also has some of my more positive traits instead of only being constantly terrified and crying. I mean he still is but he also finds comfort in things and some sensory experiences. Its not all bad.

(also he has beans now because beans make everything better) 👑 CROWN - what does your oc want to be remembered as? why?

She doesn't really worry about having to be remembered as something. She is a goddess and practically immortal (though gods can be killed in my universe. It would just take a lot of effort) so she doesnt think about post mortum things. She also doesn't really want to be remembered by most, she works mostly behind the scenes pulling on strings. Some mortals worship her and while she "blesses" them with dark powers and corrupted bodies, she doesn't really care about them all that much. Sure they help her in causing chaos and fear in the world but she doesn't necessarily need mortals for that. She has her demons and creations afterall. A few she is a bit closer to like sable and marble crocodile man once i make him but to them she is more like a wine aunt. She sometimes chats with them, gives commentary and advice as well as blessings but again she isnt super attached. So in short, her goal isn't really to be remembered by mortals. Just to destroy them.

❇️ SPARKLE - what is their most prized possession? what do they value?

That would be her creation Thorn. She is very pleased with how he turned out and how good he is in spreading terror amongst mortals. Rex is probably a close second, as he is basically her security cam system as well as manager of her many imps and demons. Very valuable as he allows her to watch and see all after most of her divine power was sealed away. Being a goddess, she can materialise items without any trouble so material goods do not interest her. It's souls and her living creations that she is invested in. Souls for providing an energy source as well as a base for demon creation so it costs less energy. And her 3 main creations Rex, Thorn and Crom were early creations that she made out of pure magic when her powers werent fully sealed away yet. She doesn't want all that magic to go to waste. Even if Crom gets on her nerves a lot, she doesn't want him to die. He performs pretty outstanding on soul reaping actually, she just wishes he was less clingy and annoying about it and was less obsessed with killing his little brother. I hope i answered this properly my brain is being a lil weird. 🔥 FIRE - do they have any self destructive tendencies? what habits do they have that hinder them from becoming their best self?

Aurora is extremely bitter and refuses to let go of the past. Astron is hoping that her time on earth will make her appreciate and understand mortals but so far no luck. He won't return her full powers unless she stops being so hateful and destructive towards mortals so I guess thats kinda self destructive of her to obsess over making all mortals pay for the betrayal the people she made commited. Also consuming souls is kind of a no no and might be fucking with her already corrupted ethereal body. It might make her sick. I'll need to look into that.