#more written prompts tomorrow; i promise >w< | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

annasinterests · 1 year ago

Text

don't look at me like that unless you mean it

smiling, having fun ♫ feeling like a number one

|| series masterlist || main masterlist ||

a/n: god dayum this took me so long to put out and i sincerely apologize friends!!! my family's been in town and i've been planning trips with my bf for the next couple of weeks so i've just been sooo busy. to make up for it, enjoy the longest chapter i've written yet :)) i legit had so much fun writing it but i also fussed w/ it a ton because i wanted to get it just how i envisioned it. nuff' ramblin' from me, love y'all, enjoy !

word count: 9.8k (i had over 10k written b4 editing but still omfg!)

pairings: joel miller x f!reader

warnings & tags: minors dni, cursing, joel/reader/tommy being cute, tommy being an instigator lowkey, mutual pining, joel and reader going on a lil 'date', sexual themes, mentions of alcohol/being drunk, honestly kinda self-indulgent esp on the music parts, angst RAAAAAAAAH — please tell me if i missed anything!

Friday. Thank God.

As the morning light painted the sky in soft hues, you opted to savor your coffee on the front porch with your feet kicked up on the deck railing, basking in the quiet before the day's festivities consumed the town.

The early hour granted you respite from the scorching sun, sparing you the discomfort of the sweltering heat that would undoubtedly arrive later. Dressed in a small tank top and shorts, you relished the cool breeze that gently brushed against your skin. Tilting your head back, you closed your eyes, allowing the sounds of chirping birds to serenade you and the warm rays envelop you in a soothing embrace.

You thought back to last night with Ellie, how much fun you had with her even though you passed out before the movie was even over. It was the perfect start to your two days of rest, and it prompted you to commit a rare act of self-care by pushing off your new workload until the new week started.

You always did something on your days off for Jackson, whether it was doing a few favors for neighbors or finding yourself in Maria’s office all day. Nothing ever to give yourself the time you deserved.

And maybe it was selfish– irresponsible, even– but you needed a real break, and when would you get that if not today? Tonight promised laughter, music, and camaraderie. All your problems and issues would still be there tomorrow anyway.

"Put some clothes on, would you?" You jerked your head forward to meet Tommy walking up with a grin on his face. You rolled your eyes.

"I'll put on more clothes when you shave off that disaster you call a mustache."

He put his hand over his chest that shook with laughter and took the vacant seat next to you. When you offered him coffee, he politely declined, chuckling when you insisted that you could add whiskey to it for him. "I actually came to ask a favor."

He watched as you peered down at the imaginary watch on your wrist before giving him a skeptical look. “Tommy, if you’re asking me to work, the answer is-”

“No! God, no.” You let out a thank fuck under your breath. “It’s for tonight.”

You raised your eyebrows as you drew a sip from your coffee. For tonight? He took your silence as a cue to continue.

"Joel tells me that you've got quite the music collection. I was wonderin' if I could borrow a couple of your tapes or CDs or whatever y'got?"

You thought about it for half a second, but pretended to be in deep contemplation. He grew antsy, attempting to seriously reason with you, and when you couldn't hold it together any longer, you hid your grin behind your mug as you watched him realize that you were fucking with him. You got up from your seat and signaled for him to follow you inside as you grabbed cassettes for his cause.

Joel had been in the kitchen pouring himself a cup from the pot you had already brewed. You peered around the corner to set your mug on the counter, flashing him a bright smile before quickly scurrying off, catching a glimpse of how his face dropped from a smile to confusion upon hearing more footsteps in the house. You giggled once you heard his groan, followed by 'Jesus, don't you know what time it is?'

You picked through your pile, grabbing tapes that you were certain would be winners. Once content with your selection, you brought them back to Tommy in the kitchen. His eyes and smile widened at the handful, carefully taking them into his possession. Joel, still clearly waking up, watched the interaction with a dull curiosity over the rim of his mug, flickering his gaze from you, to the cassettes, and lastly Tommy.

Your eyes lingered on the tapes, a small smile brought to your face at the pure nostalgia they held. You knew each track on each tape, word for word. You remembered when you heard them for the first time, what life had felt like, and when you found yourself listening to them the most. Normally, you'd feel hesitant to lend out your most prized possessions. They’d been with you ever since before outbreak day, and the one constant you had since the beginning that got you through your toughest times. But this was Tommy, and you didn’t have to think twice about whether or not you could trust him.

"Wait, I almost forgot!" You snapped out of your thinking to go and retrieve another part from your pile. You handed him a small deck of index cards binded together with twine in what was your own way of personally cataloging. "It's already in order, by cassette and song title, so you can figure out if there's something you don't wanna play.. or whatever you got planned." You lazily gestured.

The brothers exchanged a look before turning their attention to the cards. Joel set his coffee down and took the thin stack from Tommy, reading over it together as they glanced back and forth between the cardstock and the tapes. The corner of his mouth curled up as he skimmed over the songs, making it impossible for you not to smile either. You sheepishly looked down while rolling your feet from heel to toe with your hands behind your back, feeling like a kid showing their parents a piece of art they made at school.

"Had the world not gone to shit, you could’ve been a mean music curator.” Joel waved the cards between his thumb and forefinger, a suppressed laugh leaving your lips.

“Yeah.. damn, these bring back some good memories. Buncha’ old ones on here, some even way before our time.” Tommy motioned between himself and Joel.

The small smile on Joel’s face grew bigger, his face becoming more lively at a realization. “Y’know, ‘lotta these were popular bar songs. You were just shy of eighteen back then, weren’t you?”

Tommy quickly caught on to Joel’s train of thought, matching his grin. You stared at him with a subtle smirk, knowing that he knew he was right, and only asked to make it a point that he knew that. And in a way, you found it kind of.. hot? He was keenly aware of your timeline and able to make the connections that no one else really could. He didn’t have to do the mental math like Tommy probably was after he said it. You felt a surge of heat in your cheeks and on the tip of your ears as their gaze on you persisted, waiting for you to answer.

“.. I may or may not have snuck into them..”

Their voices overlapped with elation, to which you stuck up a middle finger for each Miller.

“Sounds like you were living on the edge,” Tommy peered down at Joel’s hand, “..of seventeen.”

Before you could open your mouth to scold Tommy for popping the corniest joke in all of the apocalypse, he and Joel fell into their own fit of laughter, bumping shoulders and elbowing one another. So proud and smug of their joint-effort to expose your rebellious years. But you found yourself grinning, not at the joke, but at them.

You shook your head, letting out a mix of a laugh and sigh, “Alright, you boys had your fun. Now Joel, why don’t you do your big brother duties and show Tommy the way out?”

He raised a brow at you, bringing his mug to his lips, “Must I remind you that it was you that brought him in here, not me?”

Tommy raised his hands up in defense as you glared at Joel, “Alright- I’ll see myself out.” He winked at you as he walked past, “Give you a break before ya’ gotta deal with me tonight.”

You and Joel walked him to the door, exchanging goodbyes until later this evening. Just before stepping out, Tommy suddenly turned over his shoulder to you. "Oh! Before I forget– Are you seein’ anybody?”

You froze at his question, your smile slacked and your eyes widened. The residual feeling of laughter in your chest subsided quickly as if it never existed in the first place. He held up his left hand, “Not for me, obviously.”

You rolled your eyes, then narrowing them at him. “Yeah, no shit. What, are you playing matchmaker for me?”

“Not for you, someone else.” A shit-eating grin appeared on his face. “So, are you?”

The short answer was no. You were too busy with leading your life in Jackson.. And being hopelessly in love with his brother.

“Uh– no. I’m not.”

Joel's gaze shifted towards you, your words evoking enough of a reaction out of him, to which Tommy caught and raised an eyebrow with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. They bounced between you and Joel as if he had caught a whiff of the unspoken agreement you two held. You felt your cheeks go hot again, knowing that your words hadn't gone unnoticed by either of them.

He bid a final farewell with an unconvincing nod that left you both standing in the foyer quietly, which was luckily cut short by Ellie coming through the back door, giving you both the perfect excuse to forget all about.. whatever that was.

She rubbed away the sleep in her eyes, murmuring a good morning to you and Joel as she made her way into the kitchen, both of you treading in after her. You inquired about the basics. How'd you sleep? Want me to make you something for breakfast? Do you want orange juice? What are your plans for the day? Joel watched as you engaged in conversation, admiration and warmth flaring in his chest as you seamlessly transitioned into your role as a caretaker.

You were receptive when she shared her plans for the day, further inquiring about smaller details of her schedule. He watched as Ellie became more animated the more she got to talk about her day ahead, especially as you encouraged her.

"What about you guys? Don't you both have off today?" Ellie faced in her chair so that she could clearly see you both.

You exchanged a glance with Joel before you both shrugged your shoulders. You hadn't realized that he had the day off as well, if you were being completely honest. As you thought about it, it occured to you that you hadn't gotten to figure that part out, since Tommy and all. When you confessed that you hadn’t planned anything for the day, Ellie’s eyes squinted in deep thought for a moment, then looked back at you both, “Why don’t you guys do something together?

You straightened up at her proposal, mildly thrown off, sharing another look with Joel before you both attempted to give a series of excuses, which just came out in a mess of jumbled, almost incoherent words.

“Oh, come on! You guys almost never do anything together.”

You folded your arms in defiance, but it came off more as a pout. “Yes, we do.”

“Sitting at home together doesn’t count.” You opened your mouth to disagree, but nothing came out. “Go out! Have a date or something.”

You nearly choked on your coffee as Joel sighed, speaking with caution, “Ellie–”

“Anyways! I’m off to Dina’s for the day.” She beamed and laughed in victory as she watched you two writhe in place. You could hear the smile in her voice as she left out the back door, “You kids have fun tonight, and make good decisions!”

God– first Tommy, now her. It couldn’t have been past nine yet.

You hand cradled your elbow, the other hand covering your eyes as your thumb and middle finger kneaded at your temples. Okay, maybe she was right. Maybe you and Joel didn’t spend proper ‘quality time’ together, but it just wasn’t something that either one of you were accustomed to. Before Jackson, the most you were able to be alone outside of your apartments were during smuggle runs, which was definitely not the type of recreational activity that she was referring to, and once you picked her up and finally settled here, your lives were centered around her and your respective jobs for the community.

Joel crossed his arms and leaned in the doorway that bordered the dining room, staring at the back door and then subsequently at you. You hadn’t noticed him looking, still hiding behind your hand to mask your embarrassment, and saw how his eyes raked over your figure, taking in how little clothes you were wearing. The black tank top was a deep cut halter that exposed your arms, chest, and just the littlest bit of midriff. Your shorts matched in color, the fabric just hovering over the higher part of your thighs with slits up the sides.

It was a good thing for him that you had your eyes covered. You weren’t able to see how his tongue poked over his bottom lip and his eyes that were drawn to your cleavage that was accentuated by your arms drawn together. Even with your fair share of scars, your skin looked so perfect and soft under the glow of sunlight through the window, so much that he could barely keep himself back from touching you, wanting to trace the contours of your arms with his fingers and hold your face in his palms again.

His heart thumped in his chest as he wondered what it would feel like to rub your legs against his under bed sheets. How it would feel to press his fingertips into the soft flesh of your hips–

“Joel?”

His head jerked up slightly as his eyes darted to yours. “What?”

Irked, you threw your hand away from your face in an exasperated manner, “Do you wanna come?

He stared dumbly at you, stuttering, “Do I- w-what?”

“To Lake Falwich! Weren’t you listening?” You threw him an incredulous look as he shook his head to himself, apparent to you that he in fact hadn’t listened to a damn word you said.

Lake Falwich was located off of Elk Creek, an area you and Joel switched off on patrolling. You’d found the place when you went off-path during your first summer patrol, deeming it as another little hidden gem of Jackson County. Over the years, you grew fond of it and made it a point to frequent it whenever beyond the walls, but you hadn’t been yet this season.

“Uh, yeah– Yes– Sure.”

You didn’t know what had gotten into him in the last few minutes, but you couldn’t deny that you enjoyed seeing him all flustered and not being able to keep eye contact with you. How the tables turned for once.

“I’ll be ready to head out in ten.” You began to head towards the stairs for your room, but stopped at his side and placed your hand on his shoulder, curling your fingers over the muscle, “Don’t keep me waiting.”

A grin adorned your face as you walked away, leaving Joel to hang onto the sensation that burned his skin where you touched him and force himself to calm down from the excitement growing in his pants. He hadn’t really known what he’d just gotten himself into with you, and you were pleasantly surprised at his answer as you half-expected him to come up with some reason to not go.

But one thing was clear to you both: It was definitely not a date.

Your hands draped near the straps of his pack by his hips as you rode out, brushing against his belt and jeans every so often. It wasn’t a difficult route by any means; fairly smooth and clear of any obstructions.

Being the passenger gave you the opportunity to be immersed by your surroundings rather than having to focus in front of you. You got to pay attention to the small things, like the rhythmic beat of the horse’s hooves against the ground and the scent of pine mingled with the earthy aroma of the forest. The trees towered above you, their branches forming a natural canopy that filtered the sunlight, casting dappled shadows on the trail. Every so often, the trees would give way to open meadows, where wildflowers swayed in the gentle breeze.

When you weren’t being captivated by nature, your attention was drawn back to Joel. The heat had caused his hair to curl at the nape of his neck that was slicked with sweat, seeping into the collar of his dark gray shirt that stretched across his shoulders and back with more splotches of sweat. Now and then, you’d get a glimpse of his profile when he scouted around. You felt like a teenager getting to hang out with her crush that she’d had since elementary school, your stomach doing flips just from the proximity alone.

The ride itself was filled with comfortable silence, punctuated by moments of look there and did you see that? with every passing mile. You could get used to this– having these little outings together.

You could hear the rushing water before you could see it, the sound of it growing louder and louder until it finally came into view. When the landscape presented itself before you, you felt a child-like thrill growing in your chest. The clear water shimmered with a vivid turquoise hue that seemed almost unreal, partnered with tall limestone walls that framed the lake. Smaller stone structures and boulders formed near the base of the waterfall, enticing you to explore and conquer their heights again like you’d done in the past. The vegetation extended all around the area, mosses and ferns clung to the rock walls in a tapestry of greenery. It all gave you a sense of simultaneous exhilaration and peace.

Eager to get to the water, you dismounted from the horse before Joel could hitch it, causing him to call out after you in protest and watch you with a careful eye as he got everything situated. You stood at the mouth of the lake with your boots kicked off when he joined you, slowly following suit.

“So.. What do you wanna do now?”

With the heat, there was only one thing to do.

“Jump in.” You pointed to a ledge that was a considerable height up. “From there.”

He met where your finger signaled, then back to you with a quizzical look. “Don’t you reckon that’s a bit high?”

You shrugged your shoulders and threw a smile over your shoulder as you walked away from him, earning a scoff and one of his typical disapproving head shakes. His eyes stayed on you as you made your way, widening when you started to peel off your clothes piece by piece.

First off was your tank top, slipping it effortlessly over your head, then the undoing of your belt and shimmying out of your jeans. You’d stripped down to only a sports bra and underwear, both of which happened to match, which was very much unplanned. Through each removal of clothing, Joel couldn’t help but have his eyes glued to you. He became restless, running his hands through his hair and turning around just to face back to you because he simply couldn’t keep his eyes off you. And when you looked back at him, you felt a little boost of confidence in seeing how he kept his attention on you.

You ascended the rocks, reaching your desired spot and standing proudly, waving your arms above your head at a miffed Joel. The air was filled with a refreshing mist, carrying the fragrance of damp earth and the invigorating energy of the cascading waterfall. The lake below you offered a new perspective on how high you really were, and for a second, you considered that Joel was maybe right.

But fuck it.

Your legs propelled you forward, curling up as you plummeted, and your shouts of joy drowned out by the thunderous roar of the falls. The water engulfed you, prickling your body with its cold touch. Submerged beneath the surface, you held onto the sensation of being weightless, listening to nothing but the ebb and flow of the currents and feeling them weave through your fingertips.

You emerged from the depths to the sun’s warmth on your face. When you refocused your vision, you saw that Joel was standing in the same spot as before, now with his arms crossed against his chest. You swam closer to the shoreline.

“Come on, water’s fine!” He shook his head. “It wasn’t a question, now get your ass in here, Miller!”

He rolled his eyes and huffed, shaking his head once more before pulling off his shirt by the collar and tossing it aside with his boots and pack, and despite being in the freezing water, you flooded with heat at the sight of him. You’d only seen him in small increments when tending his wounds, but now you could finally know what he looked like underneath those damned clothes.

Just as you suspected, his shoulders were strong with muscle, and the prominent veins in his hands and forearms traveled upwards through his biceps. His chest and abdomen were toned and had an even layer of hair, and you basically drooled at the definition of his hips and the trail of hair leading down that was secured by a belt. Beyond his attractive features, though, you saw his scars of survival. His torso littered with healed lesions, many of which you cared for, and a significant mark near his side that reflected the time of his near-death.

“Don’t splash me now, alright?” He stifled a laugh as he undid his belt, which took all your self-control to not watch his hands and think ungodly things. Once he stripped down to his boxer briefs, he stepped further into the lake, wincing at the coldness as he got deeper. When the water reached his thighs, he sucked in a sharp breath and hissed, “Shit- That’s cold.”

You were too busy gaping at how muscles tensed and contorted to make a stupid remark. He delved deeper into the lake until he fully submerged himself, surfacing quickly and shaking out his hair, which was doing things for you. In all the years you spent with him, you didn’t think that he could possibly get more attractive, nor did you think that you’d ever be like this right now, yet here you were.

In what was supposed to be a little fun getaway from all the stresses of the world, you found yourself seriously lusting for him in this moment, which was a stress all on its own. You were alone in a very much secluded area, only an article of clothing or two away from being naked, moreover. The very thought sent you over the edge, making you physically ache where you wanted him the most. How easy it’d be to just close the distance and get lost in him for hours.

The fact that you couldn’t do that, though, pained you viscerally. You couldn’t keep looking at him, or else you’d do something stupid, so you closed your eyes and spread your limbs out to drift on your back. You focused on your breathing, honing in on how your body bobbed with each inhale and exhale and letting the water guide you in any direction.

The next few hours were spent floating, challenging Joel to swimming races, and jumping off the rocks to see who could make the bigger splashes. You found yourselves in lots of banter and bickering, especially when you did a flip off of a ledge and Joel was very displeased that you could’ve hit your head. All you could feel was pure, unadulterated happiness. Together, you were having fun. Real fun. Enjoying each other’s company and nature’s playground.

A while after you returned to drifting on your backside, an unfamiliar sensation across your back and thighs caused you to flail and frantically look around. Sheer panic rose as you realized that you’d drifted off into the deeper end, and you tried to calmly but quickly thrust yourself back into shallow waters.

“Somethin’ got you scared?” Joel had been awfully calm with an arrogant grin on his face, and his laughter rung out clear in the air as he watched you go through the motions of panic, confusion, and finally disdain.

You feigned indignation. “Don’t be a dick.”

Once your feet touched the solid floor, you waded and found a spot to sit in the safety of the shallows, pulling your knees up and resting your arms on them. As Joel drew in to join you, you watched as the water lapped at his waist, drawing your attention to the band of his boxer briefs that seemed to hang dangerously low on his hips and how they clung to him in a way that’d have all the women in Jackson ready on their knees for him. His body swayed with a subtle rhythm and cadence that was uniquely his; full of purpose and so.. virile. You averted your gaze to the sediment of where you sat in an attempt to rid yourself of the thoughts you were having.

The clearness allowed you to examine its composition of pebbles and rocks of all kinds, and you picked up handfuls of them to admire their different qualities, quickly getting wrapped up in recognizing unique patterns and markings. Joel watched as you threw the ones you didn’t like further into the lake, like it was a process of elimination until you found the best one.

When you liked one, you wordlessly handed it to him without taking your attention away from the ones in front of you. There was a serene grace in your actions, as if you were entrusting him with something fragile and precious, and he took notice of the care in which you handled each stone. He’d give it a once over, his fingers gliding over the surface, before dropping it back into your hand. There was something about you doing this, yielding to human nature’s innocent curiosity, that made it so much more than just a seemingly mundane exchange to him.

Your eyes met his briefly, and you saw he was truly relaxed from how the hard lines of his face were softened. The sun shone on him in where you could really see the depths of his eyes; the green-gold that seeped into a lighter brown around his pupil, creating the most beautiful iris structure you’d ever seen. His skin held a perpetual tan with freckles all over his shoulders, a feature that you weren’t necessarily familiar with. Waves and curls formed near his ears and forehead as his hair dried, most of it disheveled and left you wanting to run your fingers through to tame it. Your eyes drifted to his body for a moment, overly cognizant of how much bigger he was compared to you. With a tinge of a smile, you turned back to your little stones, gently placing them back in the water in a decision to leave them where they belonged.

“As much as I’ve enjoyed this,” Joel’s voice filled the silence, “we should get goin’ soon. Promised Tommy I’d swing by to help set up a couple things.”

You hummed in acknowledgment. If there was one thing about Joel, it was that he always showed up for Tommy, no matter how big or small it was. Even if it was a five-minute task or a project that Tommy was entirely capable of doing on his own, Joel was always there. You had that in common with him, back when you had your brother.

As you were about to stand, Joel hovered over you with an extended hand. You clasped it with your own as you gained your balance, but when doing so, your eyes caught a glimpse of something slithering right under your feet. You yelped at the sight, tightening your grip around his hand, and he instinctively pulled you to him, wrapping a protective arm around your waist while acting as a shield between you and the potential danger. He scanned the water, catching on to what you saw: a plains garter snake.

At the sound of his chuckle, you braced yourself against his chest in confusion as his arms were still around you. “What’s so funny?”

“It’s not-” he loosened his hold, but his hands still splayed over your waist. “It’s harmless, nothin’ to worry about.”

“Oh.” You bowed your head forward in relief and slight embarrassment, and a faint smile played at his lips. Your hands were still on each other, almost as if you were trying to play it out as long as possible until either you pulled away or he did, which winded up being the former. You drew back to yourself, stepping backwards as he released you. “Thanks.”

You both retrieved your belongings and set up on a flat bed of rock to dry out, another comfortable silence enveloping you once again as you bathed in the warmth. With your arm slung over your eyes, you could only sense Joel’s presence beside you. You slid your arm up to peer at him, his eyes fixed on the lake. His legs were drawn towards his chest with his forearms on his knees, his chest rising and falling in calm breaths. There was a peacefulness in his expression, a sense of contentment that mirrored your own. You smiled before covering up again, but he caught you at the last second.

“What’re you thinkin’ about over there?”

You brushed off his question. “Who says I’m thinking?”

“If there’s one thing about you, it’s that you’re never not thinkin’.” You sat up at the accusatory words, arching your eyebrows in disbelief. “Go on now, don’t keep me in suspense.”

“I..” a grin spread on your face, “..was thinking about how much fun your shift must’ve been with Fitz yesterday.”

You giggled as he let out a groan, successfully diverting away from where the conversation was leading. “Oh, it was a fuckin’ shift alright– and I don’t wanna talk too much about work, but he shouldn’t be bothering you anymore.”

You faced him and leaned back on your hand, eyeing him, “Joel, what did you-”

“I took care of it.” He left no room for you to speak, his voice stern. He softened a moment after once he realized how it came out a little too sharp. He lowered his attention down to his hands, rubbing his thumb into his palm, “..Not s’pose to treat a woman the way he does, especially when it’s you.”

A moment came and went in where it looked like he regretted his words, fearing that he may have revealed too much, or maybe not enough. But what you felt was incomparable to anything you’d ever felt before, hearing him tell you– blatantly admit to you that he regarded you differently than other people, and that if someone crossed you, they were crossing him too. You always knew he had your six, but this was different than that.

“Why didn’t you tell me he was doin’ that? Or Tommy?”

Those dumb, beautiful eyes conveyed a genuine concern that immediately made you feel guilty for not saying something sooner when you very well could’ve. At the same time, you didn’t want to fuss or make a big deal out of it. It was better that it was you than someone else, like Joel. So you tolerated it, because you were still able to do your job even with an annoying fucking twat as your partner.

“I never took him seriously. I thought he’d just stop if I ignored it enough, but.. clearly not.” You gave a half-suppressed laugh, knowing how ridiculous and naive it sounded out loud. He sighed at your answer, making you fidget, “I know! I know. You’re right– it was stupid of me-”

“Sweetheart–” his hand on your leg and delicious southern drawl shut you right up, “nothin’ stupid about you tryin’ to keep the peace. Just.. let me know next time, okay?”

All you could do was nod, dumbfounded by this new, open protectiveness towards you. He knew better than anyone else how you could handle yourself, but he still couldn’t help but feel that it was his job to keep you safe and be your advocate when you weren’t your own.

Without another word, he rose and offered you a hand up, indicating that enough time had passed and you should get going if you were going to be on time for the party. You accepted the gesture again, but he held your hand longer this time as he guided you down the rocks so that you wouldn’t trip, a chivalrous act that also gave an excuse to linger on your skin.

A hot shower was what you needed to scrub the freshwater off your skin and out of your hair, also to give you some much needed relief from having to control yourself the whole time you were with him, but of course you did that after he left since you shared his bathroom.

The sun dipped lower in the sky, casting a golden glow over Jackson. The vibrant energy of the evening pulsed through the town, the streets alive with people as they made their way to the most popular establishment, laughter and music floating through the air. You’d gone through about four outfits before ultimately deciding on a ribbed henley tank, jeans, and sneakers

Just before running out the door, you checked yourself in the mirror to smooth any stray hairs away from your face. With a smile, you stepped out, falling in with your neighbors who’d been on their way over as well, engaging in conversation on the short walk there. There’d been a crowd gathered outside the Tipsy Bison, people mingling and sharing stories, some already on their second round of drinks.

Through the doors you were immediately greeted by a wave of warmth and liveliness. Your eyes danced around the bar, jumping from full booths and high tables, to the large alcohol selection behind the counter guarded by about three barkeeps if you were counting right. The air was filled with a thousand different scents, ranging from beer and cigarettes to perfume and aftershave. And lastly, the sounds which brought it all together, the clinking of glasses and hum of conversation, and of course, music. Your music that people were enjoying.

Searching the crowd, you spotted familiar faces and friends scattered throughout the place, engrossed in their own circles, but the one person you actively sought out was nowhere in sight. Your efforts slowed as you heard a picking of chords grow louder over the speakers, causing a wild smile to grow on your face.

♫

I looked out this morning and the sun was gone Turned on some music to start my day I lost myself in a familiar song

♫

“I closed my eyes and I slipped awaaay!” Tommy appeared at your side two shots in one hand and unopened beers between his fingers in the other, slinging the arm around your shoulder as he pushed the small glass into your hands.

Without hesitation, you threw the shot back with him, feeling the instant burn go down your throat. You both popped off the beer caps off a nearby counter, a party trick you’d gotten quite good at over the years, before rushing over to the middle of the floor to join the rest of the party and sing your hearts out to your first song of the night. You could barely hear yourself over the speakers and fellow singers, saving you from the embarrassment from being incredibly off-key. Your body reacted instantly to the music, finding the rhythm and constantly moving in accordance. That was the other thing about music, you felt most comfortable in your skin when you listened and danced to it, being able to fall in with whatever played. In between the verses, you hurried over to the bar to grab more shots and beers, slamming doubles back before pulling each other back to the floor.

You and Tommy locked arms and pressed back to back while holding up your bottles in a toast-fashion, switching off during the last chorus and refrain and holding out the longer notes.

♫

It’s more than a feeling (More than a feeling!)

When I hear that old song they used to play (More than a feeling!)

I begin dreaming (More than a feeling!) ...

♫

The alcohol was slowly but surely taking over, a key indicator being the warm, fuzzy buzzing that flourished throughout your body. You clung to Tommy’s shoulder and leaned towards his ear during a break between songs, “Tommy, this is way better than I thought it was gonna be!”

He looked at you with wide eyes and a grin, “I know right! Joel really helped pull it together before we opened the doors!”

You smiled at the compliment towards his brother, then furrowing your brows. “Where is he, anyway?”

You both looked around for a moment before Tommy steered you off to the side, yelling that it was too hard to see from the middle, and your efforts were put on pause again as you winded up near a large group of patrolmen that grabbed Tommy’s attention. He dragged you with him to socialize, though you mainly watched from the outskirts of the circle, smiling and nodding along where the conversations went as you didn’t have much to say or add.

When you went to drink from your bottle, you noticed the lightness of it and realized that you needed another, giving you the perfect excuse to slip away and look for him. You checked over your shoulders as you squeezed your way through to the bar to request your next drink, and it didn’t help that the room was dimly lit and was accompanied by flashing strobes.

The barkeep slid you a bottle across the counter and you swiftly popped it off, taking a swig before turning around right into somebody. An apology flew out of your mouth before you could even see who it was, their voice catching your attention and making you look at them.

“Hey, no worries! Both still got our drinks, yeah?”

Samson flashed you a grin, his hand light on your arm but enough to keep you steady. You raised your beer to him, his eyes flickered between it and you before raising his own and tapping the neck of your bottles together. You both took another swig.

As you got into conversation, you moved away from the bar towards the wall where there wasn’t much action going on. You talked about how nice the place had been transformed for the night and shared your favorite drinks, occasionally dropping a drunk-story from your youths. And the weird part? You found yourself genuinely enjoying his presence. With the way he kept eye-contact with you and made you feel like he was actually listening and comprehending the words falling out of your mouth, laughing and giving you verbal cues that he was following along, it made you see him in a way you hadn’t before.

You were.. enchanted. If it had been any other man, they’d dominate the conversation, going on about themselves the whole time and forcing you to listen. But with Samson, he treated you like an equal. He never cut you off or interjected to relate, waiting until you were entirely done or if you allowed him to weigh in between your thoughts.

“By the way–” he wiped his mouth of any residual beer, “I don’t want this to come off as weird, but you look incredible tonight. I don't think I’ve ever seen you dress in anything other than like, work clothes– and not that you look bad in that!” You giggled as he tripped over his words, his cheeks flushing a deeper shade. “What I’m trying to say is that I think you’re very beautiful, and I don’t want you to think I’m like Fitz.”

Your fingers brushed against his arm, furrowing your eyebrows at him for thinking such things, “Awh, Samson! You’re nothing like him, I hope you know that.”

He smiled down at his feet before back at you, “I know the other day you said that you and Joel weren’t a thing, and Tommy told me you weren’t seeing anybody– so I guess I’m just triple checking here– is there someone in the picture?”

So this was who Tommy was playing matchmaker for.

Your heart slowed and you fought to keep the innocent smile on your face. Was he approaching you at the bar when you bumped into him? Was he pretending to act like that just to segue into this? Several things ran through your mind as your eyes drifted away from his, and just when he was about to call you back to attention, the devil himself appeared: Tommy.

He swooped in around Samson’s shoulders, nursing a beer in hand. He held a smugness in his demeanor, surely you thought it was about the scene he’d set up until he spoke.

“Looks like you may have a roommate for the night.”

He jerked his hand behind him to a woman leaning against a pillar with Joel standing mere inches in front of her. He stood still with his hands to himself, but dropped his head closer to hers with a clear smile on his face. She beamed up at him with a look you knew all too well, not even attempting to conceal her attraction to him. She laughed too much for your liking while gripping his bicep, probably sneaking in some flirty comment with a double-meaning. Good fucking God.

You thought maybe you had a breakthrough at the lake, but this proved that you clearly didn’t, and you couldn’t believe you were stupid enough to think that what he said had any depth underneath it. Joel cared about you– this you knew. He cared in the same way he cared for Tommy and Ellie. But somewhere along the lines you’d gotten it confused with love, something he had for them, but maybe not you. Samson’s words replayed in your head in a painful reminder.

You said you and Joel weren’t a thing… Tommy told me you weren’t seeing anybody.. Is there someone in the picture?

Your eyes widened then narrowed, your jaw wiring shut as your chest began to heave. Tommy’s grin fell as he watched your features morph into something between resent and heartbreak, his eyes nervously peering from you, to Joel, to Samson as the alcohol took a momentary backseat.

He’d always sensed something between you and Joel after you settled in, though he knew that neither one of you would ever admit to your feelings for each other out of stubbornness. But he saw the way Joel looked at you after saying you didn’t have someone to call your own this morning, how his big brother almost looked offended by the truth of your answer. The reality was that Samson was interested in you, but Tommy had seen it as an opportunity to put pressure on the status between you both, and now he saw that it didn’t go in the direction of which he hoped and it was clearly affecting you.

“Oh, y’know he won’t take ‘er home! Never’s taken anyone. Not like that with him. Too chickenshit.” He tried his best to play off his earlier comment to put you at ease, but by the way the gap seemed to be closing between them only made the green-eyed monster rear its ugly head in full force.

You cleared your throat as you broke away, grabbing three shots off a nearby high table and handing them to the two men before you, needing to wash down the bitter taste in your mouth. “Oh, Tommy, you must’ve mistaken me for someone who cares. Who knows if I’ll even be going home tonight?”

Samson’s face lit up in surprise as you wiggled your brows at him and grabbed his hand to lead away while leaving Tommy open-mouthed as he saw right through your spite. Breathless curses left his mouth as he watched you disappear through the crowd, a frustration growing towards you and Joel for being so goddamn stupid about each other.

The barkeeps fed you two more shots and another beer. The alcohol was definitely hitting now. A few minutes ago, you were properly pissed off, wanting to storm up to Joel and give him a piece of your mind and telling the woman to go kick rocks, but now you were all over Samson, turning up the charm for him. It didn’t matter anymore if he just wanted to fuck, because maybe you’d just let him. He let out a chuckle and smiled, prompting you to tilt your head at him in question.

“The music tonight has been so fucking good,” he drank from the bottle, a smirk forming on your face, “I mean, when was the last time you heard this song?”

The bass riff and guitars let you know exactly what song had been playing, a long-time favorite of yours. You could’ve answered 'a couple months ago' to his question, but you took silent pride in knowing that he was another person impressed by your picks. He understood your cue as you turned your head to the middle of the room and back, placing his hand on the small of your back as you weaved through people. You wrapped an arm around his shoulder as he drew you closer to him by your waist, moving in sync to the beat.

♫

One of these nights One of these crazy old nights We're gonne find out pretty mama What turns on your lights ...

♫

If intimacy, yearning, and sex was a song, surely it’d be this one.

♫

Ooh.. someone to be kind to In between the dark and the light ...

♫

You sang out with your heart, pressing your body into Samson’s, but knowing the lyrics were about him. And deep down, you wanted him to hear it and think of you. Think of how you were the daughter of the devil himself and the angel in white, the woman he’s been looking for with a little of both and how she is in sight.

Around you were all couples reflecting exactly what you’d been doing, some doing more but your eyes didn’t linger on them long. You caught the faces of work friends and neighbors totally focused on their person as you swayed around, smiling at their fun. Eventually, the whole room sang along, an imperfect harmony to your ears that you couldn’t get tired of hearing tonight.

As the song winded down, Samson held you closer and craned his head down until your foreheads and noses were touching, still swaying to the guitar riffs. You took it a step further and pressed your mouth to his, your hand cupping his cheek and fingertips grazing his hair. You hadn’t expected anything out of it other than the feeling of your lips on someone else’s, but you didn’t pull away. You couldn’t. Your tongues found one another every other kiss, deepening as they went. His warmth kept you glued to him, and you found yourself taking a liking to his taste of alcohol and.. mint, maybe? Definitely something with an icy, refreshing hint.

You didn’t realize how long you’d been kissing, or kissing enough times that it was leading to straight-up making out, until you heard clear hoots and whistles during the switch between songs. When you pulled away, his lips were noticeably more plump compared to earlier, and the tingling sensation on yours let you know that they probably looked the same. You bit your bottom lip as you looked around at the ones cheering you on, the corners of your mouth curling up, but you broke out into a complete grin once you saw his face.

♫

Off with your head Dance til you're dead Heads will roll Heads will roll ...

♫

You’d almost tripped over your own two feet, discreetly looking over Samson’s shoulder from left to right to make sure you were seeing things right, and the excitement you felt when they were? Unmatched. And almost as if it’d been planned, the perfect song was playing.

If he’d been giving you or Samson a death-stare, you couldn’t tell, but either way, you loved seeing the scowl on his face. His fingers tightly curled around his beer that if he did it any tighter it’d break, the hard lines on his face prominent to you even this far away. You situated yourself to the side, giving him the perfect view as you brushed your nose against Samson’s, giving him your best doe eyes before melting into his mouth again, making sure that Joel could see the smile on your lips when you broke away and went back for more.

Your body winded up as the song progressed, building up to the drop and heavy riff. The strobe lights blinked quickly enough to cause a stroboscopic effect on everyone’s movement, perceiving them to move slower than they actually were. But when you looked back at Joel, he stayed completely still, his eyes locked on you between the several bodies that separated you from him. He looked so.. menacing.. that it made you shiver and throb. A wicked grin spread on your lips.

♫

Off, off with your head! Dance, dance til you're dead!

♫

Turning around, you pressed into Samson and grinded your backside into him. His hands were off you as quickly they were on you, frowning at the absence, you spun around and saw why: Tommy, again. You’d suspected something bad from the way his gaze fell back and forth between you both and he had a strong hand on his shoulder, but were eased when Samson held up a finger to you and smiled.

As much as you wanted to dance, you also wanted another drink, the empty bottle in your hand now warm from holding it for so long. Sliding shoulders through the floor, you looked between the bar and the bathroom, choosing to make the pitstop before continuing on. Pushing in the door, you were relieved there wasn’t a line, darting into an open stall to squat and do your business. As you finished, another body entered the bathroom in heels that clicked and echoed until they stopped in front of the sink, to what you imagined was a woman checking her makeup. When you got out, you saw their reflection in the mirror– indeed they’d been checking their face, but it’d also been the woman that’d been smitten with Joel. You paid no mind to her other than your initial glance, ignoring her presence and harshly scrubbing the soap on your hands.

“That older Miller’s somethin’, ain’t he?” Your hands froze under the running water. “I only got a taste earlier, but I bet he’s real good in bed.”

The fuck does she mean she got a taste earlier?

Your face must’ve been showing too much of a reaction based on the stupid fucking smile on hers and a snobbish laugh. Not even bothering to dry off your hands with paper towel, you rubbed them against your jeans and threw the door open to leave, storming up to the bar and impatiently tapping your fingers against the wood as you waited.

Fuck her, and fuck Joel. And you know what? Fuck Tommy, too. If he hadn’t brought it to your attention, maybe you wouldn’t have seen it. Then you wouldn’t have downed one too many drinks and legitimately considered sleeping with someone as rebound off hurt feelings, and then maybe, just maybe, you wouldn’t be feeling like all kinds of fucked up right now. You blinked back the burning in your eyes. Don’t cry. Don’t fucking cry over this right now.

The lights returned to their original dimness and calmed down on the strobes, allowing you to search around a bit easier for any of the three people you found yourself with most tonight, but had no luck. Samson and Tommy were out of sight, and you didn’t have the slightest idea of what he pulled Samson away for. As for Joel, he moved from the last spot you remembered him in, or was it over there? You shook your head. It didn’t take much contemplation to decide on going home, you had your fun, but it was over, and you were too far gone to spark it back up in any capacity.

You held your arms tight to your body as you embraced the cool air on the walk to Rancher Street, a fair distance from the Tipsy Bison. The lightness in your head caused you to stumble quite a bit, wishing that either your house was closer or that someone would’ve walked with you. Other times when you drank too much, though it didn’t happen very often, either Tommy or Joel were right there at your side to get you home safe, but you wanted to throw yourself in someone’s yard and pass the fuck out rather than be alone.

Stomping up the porch, you caught yourself on the doorknob last minute as you tripped, fumbling it open and pushing inside. You ungracefully dropped to your ass, tugging at the aglets of your laces in the dark until the knots came undone and kicked your shoes off. So focused on keeping yourself upright, you hadn’t noticed Joel staring at you while leaning against the entryway of the living room with his arms crossed.

“Wasn’t expecting you.” His tone was deep and flat. You scoffed as you got off the floor, face contorting as you mocked him.

“I live here, don’t I?”

“Alone, I meant.” You shook your head as you walked past him, but he grabbed your wrist and held you in place, feeling the heat of his glare on your back. “You gon’ tell me what the hell that was back there?”

You met his eyes over your shoulder. “That was me having a good time. Same as you with that lovely woman.”

“Bullshit.” He shot back. “That wasn’t the same.”

“Oh, please,” you scoffed while yanking your wrist back, turning into the kitchen and bracing yourself along the island, “s’hardly a difference.”

“Really?” He followed you, his frustration apparent in the way his jaw clenched. “‘Cause it sure looked like you were all over him tryin’ to prove somethin’.”

You pointed at yourself, “I don’t have anything to prove to anybody!” you snapped, the words coming out slow but loud, “And if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re jealous.”

His eyes darkened, slowly taking a step towards you, “I am not-”

“Then what the fuck is wrong?” You staggered around the island on the emphasis of the curse, throwing your hands up, “I didn’t do a damn thing, and you’re losing your fucking head!”

“You didn’t– Wow.” A wry laugh came out his mouth. He waved you off, his tone dripping with bitterness. “I ain’t gotta explain myself to you.”

“And neither do I!” You retorted in defiance, your arms grandly gesturing. Your cheeks were hot with anger now, more so than before. “I can do whatever the hell I want, Joel! I don’t need your fucking permission!”

He dragged a hand down his face, turning away from you before whipping around and meeting you at the end of the island, raising his voice at you. “You’re impossible, you know that?”

“And you’re insufferable!” you seethed as you pushed his chest, his hands seizing your wrists, “Acting like you have some fucking claim over me when we’re not even together!”

The silence after your outburst was deafening.

His anger faltered as a flash of pain crossed his face, quickly making your own frustration subside. The hard lines on his face deepened, a slight frown and somberness settling upon it. His grip on your wrists remained firm, but there was a hint of vulnerability in his touch. You wanted to blame the alcohol for making you so mean, but it was really the floodgate of feelings that’d been repressed for far too long.

You huffed, “Joel, I-” he interrupted you by tearing his eyes away from yours and releasing your wrists.

The pang in your chest was unmistakable. This wasn’t how this was supposed to go. This was the part where everything was supposed to come out, to confront the truth of your feelings, but instead he was backing away, retreating and shutting down that conversation before it could even begin. You said his name again, but he simply raised his hand and continued to walk out of the kitchen.

Fuck– No. No, no, no. Your dejection passed and your temper flared up again. No, he doesn’t get to just walk away.

“Joel!” You called out, your voice tinged with frustration and desperation, “Joel, stop!”

But he didn’t. He kept walking, putting more distance between you and fueling your determination. Your heart was pounding as you quickened your pace to catch up with him upstairs, his arm just out of reach before he slammed his door in your face. He didn’t respond when you pounded on the door and demanded for him to come out, your temper mixing between anger and hurt.

“Screw you, Joel! I’m so tired of this– whatever the fuck this is!” Your voice trembled, feeling a punch to the gut when you remembered an obnoxiously accurate point he’d made to you once before. “I-I fucked up– but people do things when they’re scared!”

Your eyes stung, and it hadn’t dawned on you yet that you were potentially jeopardizing everything by blabbering off, but you couldn’t stop now.

“I can’t- Fuck-” a ruined sigh forced itself out your lungs, your thoughts moving too fast for you to comprehend, “If you’re gonna break my heart, do it now, because I can’t-”

You didn’t know when he’d opened the door and stepped out, but you stopped your rambling as soon as you saw him. The silence fell heavy, the only sound being his boots stepping towards you until his chest was nearly touching yours and his breath fanned over your skin. Your eyes darted around his face, from his eyes, to his nose, lips, beard, and back to his eyes again. Just the slightest inch forward and you’d be touching him, the fact making you shiver and fiercely pulse between your thighs.

Your heart ached when you saw the raw emotion in his eyes– an amalgamation of sadness, yearning, lust, and tenderness– all things you grew to be familiar with when you found yourselves running in circles. You couldn’t stand the way his eyes flickered between yours and how his warm hands were slowly reaching up to cup your face. And how you could now feel his chest pressed against yours. And how his lips parted. And that fucking look on his face.

“Joel,” you quavered, “don’t..”

But he knew.

A soft, broken breath escaped you as it was all suddenly becoming too real, reaching the point of no return.

“Don’t look at me like that unless you mean it.”

His lips crashed into yours.

#joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller fic #tlou #the last of us #tlou fanfiction #annasmasterlist #annawrites

51 notes · View notes

kybabi · 4 years ago

Note

Can I get a hurt comfort scenario with Sakusa, tsukishima, and matsukawa where they’re in a relationship but the reader feels unwanted/unloved by them bcs they’re being extra snarky or cold or sum so she distances herself so when they break up it’ll hurt less? So the boys feel guilty and they make up?

their s/o thinking they want to break up

w/ tsukishima, matsukawa, and sakusa!

(a/n: man this prompt😭

anyways all are written in the timeskip!! at first glance it looks really angsty but i promise there’s a happy ending <3

ps im sorry this lowkey sucks smh it’s like 4 am and i’m loopy😀)

tsukishima

in the beginning, you were pretty surprised he even accepted your confession

he was cool and detached in a way that you weren’t

but over time, he warmed up to you, and you fell in love with him

but recently, he was becoming cold and distant in the same way he used to be

he was no longer affectionate with you

often times you would fall asleep waiting for him to come home

and your heart broke when you came to the realization;

he didn’t love you anymore

you decided you were going to ask him tonight.

now it’s half past one, and you’re a little tired, but you keep your resolve and decide that you’ll stay up no matter what.

but when the door opens, dread fills your gut, and you become nervous. you get off your bed and go up to see him. he’s slouched over the counter with his phone in his hands, and when he finally sees you, his eyes widen in surprise. you’re almost never awake by the time he comes home.

“hi,” you mumble.

“hey.”

you fidget, eyes searching around the room distractedly.

at your silence, he slips past you and into the bedroom, exhausted. it had been another long day at work, but thankfully he’ll have a week off soon and he’s hoping to spend it with you.

you follow him in, not surprised by his behavior. you sigh dejectedly.

“could i talk to you for a minute?” you ask. he doesn’t turn to meet your gaze.

“babe, i’m already exhausted. can we do this another day?” he mutters, obviously not paying any attention to you.

even though you’ve expected this, his behavior still hurts. it’s become clear to you that he doesn’t even care about you anymore. frustrated tears start to well up in your eyes.

“do you love me anymore?” you whisper, shaky. kei stops in his tracks.

“what?” he responds, turning around to see you. his eyes widen in alarm at seeing you cry so suddenly.

“i said, do you love me anymore?” you repeat, louder this time.

kei stays silent.

why are you even asking this? how could you even think—

but then he pauses.

he realizes how he’s been neglecting you. he’s been putting in so many extra hours and coming home too tired to tend to you. he can’t even remember the last time he just spent a moment alone with you.

but you take his silence as an answer, and your heart breaks.

you knew the answer, but the pain of its confirmation hurts even more. you bow your head.

“i’ll just—” you try. “i’ll get my things tomorrow,” you whisper, leaving the bedroom.

kei snaps out of his thoughts at your words. and when he sees you leaving, he panics.

“wait!” he yells after you, grabbing your wrist. you don’t turn to look at him, wounds still fresh from his disinterest.

“let me go, kei,” you cry, voice wobbling pathetically.

he turns you around and lifts your chin up. a seemingly endless stream of tears continues its trail down your cheeks, and his chest aches at the sight.

“of course i still love you, y/n,” he declares.

your eyebrows furrow in confusion.

“how could you think i don’t love you anymore?” he whispers.

“what?” you respond, baffled. “but, you—”

he sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“look, i know i’ve been distant,” he mumbles. “but that doesn’t mean i love you any less. i’ve just been caught up with work,” he explains. you relax a little at this, and he pulls you into his chest, hoping it’ll make you calm down.

“so you... you still love me?” you ask, muffled by his shirt. he rolls his eyes.

“...yeah. whatever,” he replies, feigned annoyance leaking into his response. he noses affectionately at your hair anyway.

matsukawa

you met issei a couple years back and hit it off with him immediately

he was kind, funny, and sweet

he would make time for the two of you often and enjoyed being in your company

but in the last couple of weeks, it felt like he was the exact opposite

he rarely even spoke to you, always out at work or doing something or other that he wouldn’t talk about

he seemed to always be busy, and during the times where you did see him, he seemed to be irritated or tired

and while you loved him deeply, you realized that he just didn’t feel the same anymore

you’d planned to have dinner with your boyfriend tonight at 6.

it’s 9 now, and he hasn’t sent you a single text all day.

you sigh, putting your phone down after checking it for the hundredth time. it’s not like you weren’t expecting him to stand you up; he’s been doing that a lot lately.

but you hoped that maybe, just maybe, this time would be different. that perhaps you were wrong and that he did still want to be with you.

but this just confirms it; he doesn’t care about your relationship anymore.

when he finally comes home, you don’t bother getting up. the food you prepared sits on the stove, untouched.

“hey,” he mutters tiredly. you turn away from him.

“hi.”

issei turns to look into the kitchen and sees that you’ve made something.

“were we supposed to have dinner tonight?” he asks. you scoff.

“yeah. at 6.”

“oh,” he mumbles guiltily. truthfully, matsukawa hasn’t had a lot of time on his hands lately. he’s always been busy with either work or other things. and he knows he’s been treating you terribly, but he hopes to make it up to you when he gets some time off. “look, we can always—”

“what?” you retort. “reschedule? this is the fourth time in two weeks, issei!” he sighs frustratedly.

“i know, but i’ve been busy, okay? i just have so much going on,” he explains.

“i never even see you!” you yell. “is it so bad that i just want my boyfriend back?”

“i can’t put my life on hold to please you, y/n!” he counters. he knows what he’s saying is wrong, but he’s already getting defensive anyway.

you freeze.

“is that what i’m doing?” you whisper, voice small. you’re not looking at him anymore. “holding you back?”

he stares at you, anger dissipating. what?

“y/n—”

“do you even want me anymore?” you ask. it’s only when you look up at him that he sees the hurt swimming in your eyes. his heart squeezes painfully in his chest, guilt stirring in his gut.

he hadn’t meant to get so defensive, really. it was just reflexive.

because he knows how bad of a boyfriend he’s been in the last couple of weeks and he knows you’re hurting because of it.

so he stands in front of you, mouth opening and closing as he tries to figure out how to make this right. but you have your answer.

“right.”

so you turn to leave, tears finally spilling over your cheeks, and you finally accept that he just doesn’t love you like that anymore.

but at seeing you leave, his heart stops, and he rushes over to stop you.

“y/n, wait!”

he wastes no time pulling you into him, refusing to let you go.

“issei, just let me go!” you sob, pawing at his arm weakly. it’s futile.

“no. you need to hear what i have to say,” he says, voice stern with determination. it’s obvious he’s not going to let up so you give in, too tired to continue, and he comes around to face you.

“i love you, okay?” he whispers. “i love you more than anything in the world. and i’ve been doing a terrible job at showing it.” you look up at him sadly. “i know i’ve been neglecting you, but i wanna make it up to you, if you’ll let me.”

you meet his gaze. “really?” you whisper, a little gleam of something like hope glistening in your eyes. he nods, and you let him pull you in flush against him. “you really scared me.”

he sighs. “i know. but i love you, okay?”

you hum contentedly. “okay.”

sakusa

from the very beginning, you understood that dating a pro athlete would be a very different experience

you knew he’d often be busy and have little time left over for you

despite this, you knew he was worth it

and surprisingly, he made ample time for you

but in the last month, it seemed you two really had no time at all

he was always busy with the team, and you spent many nights alone

but what was worse was that he didn’t even seem to want to spend any time with you

he wasn’t even a little affectionate with you

and most of the time it just felt like he wanted you gone

anxiety and self-consciousness manifested rapidly, and you couldn’t take it anymore

tonight, you’re going to confront him.

you’ve spent too many dinners eating alone and too many nights in an empty bed. you miss your boyfriend terribly.

when he walks through the door, you get up to see him. he walks past you.

“how was practice?” you ask. he shrugs. “you tired?” you try again. he just nods.

you sigh, the frustration from earlier returning in full force.

“you gonna tell me why you’ve been ignoring me?” you ask, arms crossed. he stops and turns to look you, confused.

“what are you talking about?”

he knows exactly what you’re talking about.

“maybe the fact that i don’t even get to see my own boyfriend anymore?” you respond, exasperated.

he pinches the bridge of his nose, irritated.

sakusa knows why you’re upset, and he knows that he hasn’t been treating you right. but distancing himself from you felt like the best option, because he needed to be the best for his team and it was becoming hard to juggle so many things in his life.

“i still make time for you, y/n. i’m sorry that i can’t cater to your every need, alright?”

you scoff, disbelieving.

“how can you even say that? it’s like i live alone, kiyoomi!” you yell, desperate. he just sighs.

“i know i’ve been busy, but you knew i would be this way from the start, y/n. don’t put this on me just because you’re lonely!”

his words sting, and tears well up in your eyes.

“if you weren’t such a distraction, then maybe i’d have time for you!”

you reel back, chest aching painfully at his honesty. so that’s all you are to him. a distraction.

“just do it,” you plead.

“what?”

“if you wanted to break up with me, you should’ve just done it instead of stringing me along this entire time!” you cry. sakusa freezes.

guilt begins to come over him, smothering him like a blanket. he hadn’t been thinking at all about how you were feeling, his selfishness taking over him and pushing you away. but it seems as though he’s pushed you too far, because he’s about to lose you, and it’s all his fault.

“fine,” you mutter, voice shaky. “if you won’t do it, i’ll do it myself!” you look up at him, pain swimming in your eyes. “this is over.”

it’s only then, when you start to leave, that kiyoomi feels like he can move. he panics, maneuvering in front of you so that you can’t reach the door.

you sob, desperately trying to push past him, but he’s grabbing your wrists and you can’t move.

“just let me go, kiyoomi!” you cry, hiccuping. he swallows.

“i’m sorry, i’m sorry,” he mutters, pulling you against him despite your protests. “please don’t leave me.”

you sob into his chest, exhausted from your fight.

“i shouldn’t have pushed you away. i didn’t even realize how you felt, and i’m so sorry for that,” he apologizes, regret in his voice. “i don’t want this to be over, okay? i’ll do anything to make you stay,” he pleads desperately.

at this, your crying ceases a little, and you relax into him.

“y-you really mean it?” you sniffle, looking up at him through teary eyes. he nods, kissing you gently.

“you mean so much to me, you know that?” he whispers against your lips.

and when he pulls you even closer against him and presses his lips against yours, you know he means it.

8K notes · View notes

4dtk · 3 years ago

Note

May I request fluff w/ jaehyun + the ff prompts:

31. hugging while straddling the partner

34. jaw kisses

24. whispering in their ear, lips touching the skin

I just know this is smthg like after a loong day and they finally have the night for themselves KSKSJSJS this is kinda a stretch but like imagine if jae would whisper smthg along the lines of ‘maybe we should just get married’ KSJSJSJSJS BUT AGAIN ITS UP TO U IF YOU’D LIKE TO DO THAT TY SO MUCH I ENJOY UR FICS A LOT 🤍🤍🤍🤍

so cute, thanks for requesting!! and thank you for the kind words <33

hugs, 31: hugging while straddling the partner

kisses, 34: jaw kisses

touching, 24: whispering in their ear, lips touching the skin

“you sure you don’t wanna go back to the dorms tonight?” you mumble, the affection of your boyfriend shown with the hand on your waist and the kiss on your temple. as you bid farewell to the boys piling into the two cars lined up for them, johnny shoots the two of you one last deafening bye! before slipping into the car, remnants of their presence leaving with the screech of tires.

jaehyun shakes his head against your hair, interlocking your fingers as he brought you upstairs. he knew your apartment complex like the back of his hand, memorising the convenience store in the facility along with other amenities. he pulls your sleepy figure through the area, winding through the circle of the swimming pool as well as other smaller corridors before you finally reach the lift.

“why don’t you wanna go back?” you ask after a satisfying shower, feeling more energised than you were just now as you towel dried your hair. the boys who came over for dinner were nice to clean up the dining table, with taeyong and doyoung even offering to clean the dishes. jaehyun was quick to say yes with the promise of treating them to dinner next time, even prompting them to ignore your frantic, flustered hands.

“and why did you ask them to wash the dishes?” you pout, walking over to where he sat on the bed. jaehyun laughs, hands finding its home around your waist where he pulls you to his chest. from there, he hauls you onto his lap as he lies down, a content sigh leaving his lips when he finds you’re comfortably fitted onto his pelvis.

“lazy.” was his answer to both questions, enjoying the way the sheets felt on your bare legs due to the shower. jaehyun was warm, too, in contrast with the fabric below you. the other sits up, allowing your arms to go around his neck before you gently tug him into a hug before the noises finally come to a stop. the rustle of the sheets subside, jaehyun’s breathing turns silent, the shuffle of footsteps downstairs appear non-existent.

you can feel jaehyun’s hum through your body, seemingly reverberating through your bones and the monotonous tone of it causes you to unwind from the busy night. “thought you’d say that.”

the other makes a noise of agreement, lips slowly and surely leaving a trail of kisses along your jaw. it’s light, feathery, mirroring how you feel, and the natural turn of his head has you needing to break away from the embrace. you want to take back the quietness of the night, now, only being able to hear your heartbeat in your ears as jaehyun stares up at you with the softest gaze that night. he’s unrelenting, holding the stare with your eyes which shone with moonlight on the high floor you stayed on.

“should thank me…” your lover speaks in broken sentences, “now we can happily cuddle without worrying cleaning up tomorrow.”

you roll your eyes affectionately, “sometimes i’m glad i’m a germaphobe. wouldn’t want to keep food and dirty bowls outside overnight. you however…” a gentle smack to your ass earns a laugh out of you, soon returning to its place on the small of your back.

“i’m not that bad,” jaehyun frowns with faux sadness, “i just couldn’t wait to have you in my arms for the night. i love the members but i want alone time too, baby.” the confession makes your heart fly, a small smile slowly making its way onto your face. “i think i want it too much, don’t ya think?”

your heart jumps a hundred stories higher when jaehyun leans in to stop at your ear, with hot breath that makes your skin burn a thousand times worse, “maybe you should just marry me.” your hand tenses up at the back of his nape, your thighs tense, you’re suddenly frozen in your spot.

“h-huh?” jaehyun only snorts at your reaction and relishes in the way your jaw hangs open, stupefied. he grins at you.

“i meant what i said, wifey,” you have no time to process your shock before he takes your lips with his in a rush to feel you close to him, moving unhurriedly in order to enjoy and savour every last bit of you. you hum, wiggling your body to nestle it tighter with his as all worries leave your mind, with the same sentence repeating like a broken record.

the room echoes with your giggles and laughter after, wrapping the both of you up like a comfortable blanket full of love for each other. jaehyun whispers the same words again, omitting the first four and saying out the ones commonly written in movie scripts and proposal videos. marry me. marry me. he can’t decide whether he wants you to hear it or not, but he does it with full intent when your breath evens out and all he can hear are wedding chimes and cheers of your family members.

jaehyun falls asleep with a sweet dream that night, of you and him sharing your first dance, and a newfound desire to make it come true.

299 notes · View notes

zephyr-thedragon · 3 years ago

Text

sooooo

uhmmmmm

i know y'all don't normally get angst from me and tbh i don't rlly know what happened here either but a n y w a y s

hands down this is my favorite song i've written for the fandom so far, I'm literally so proud of it (and myself), i even made a custom cover for it, but this is for Winter and Scarlett (surprise surprise)

Honestly, you can interpret this song however you want, there isn't really a set theme or specific event it revolves around (although I did originally write it for the day two prompt flowers 👀), but I think this would be what Scarlet would go through if she were ever to lose Winter (temporarily or not), who knows how the series would have changed if they ended up together, but in this song Scarlet tells Winter's story, or the story of Snow White as that of a girl who was strong, and fierce and faught against her monsters with determination to reach her happy ever after, without the help of a (knight in shining armor), and she wants to honor Winter and her bravery no matter what

aalright I'm done rambling

enjoyyyy!!! (i apologize in advance)

Snow White

Sung by Scarlet - about/for Winter

Written by me

Guitar Base Chords: C Em Am Dm (Capo 5)

‎

[Verse 1]

Oh you haunt me in my dreams

Just out of reach

Your memory

feels so close

‎

I can't stand the startling peace

It's like your ghost wants me to calm

Wants me to move on

But when I know you're gone

‎

I can't sleep a wink

I can't erase the pain

You want me to believe, but I can't today

It's too hard, It's too much, and my heart feels empty without your touch

‎

It's temporary

It's gonna be okay

I don't how you think, this is gonna go away

This is too far, I promise

I meant to tell you that I love you but I don't how to say

‎

[Pre-Chorus]

You remind me of the flowers in my garden

the comfort of my home

All hours that I've spent, learning love, and letting go

I haven't had much time to feel it

as the world enters the cold

but you're the only flower that stays warm under the cover of snow

‎

[Chorus]

Snow White

A princess who didn't need a knight

A girl who didn't know what it was like

to be treated right

Oh Winter I know that you'll fight

‎

Snow White

I'll wait for you day and night

the only flower that blooms in the moonlight

Oh please tell me you're alright, Winter

My Snow White

‎

[Verse 2]

I'm buried I'm cursed, my fairytale was meant to hurt

forget happy ever after, this is the end of this chapter

At least I met you

At least I let you

Into my heart

Cause for a second love wasn't so hard

‎

Your pain, your sorrow, it's what gets me to tomorrow

I live on in your name, I'll fight until my dying day

You deserve more than me, you deserve everything

But when was life ever rightfully accommodating?

‎

Oh, I can't make it worse

I can't change your fate

How I wish I could, but it's always too late

I just have to wake up

Always missing your face

‎

You understand, that when I asked for a happy ending I didn't mean one that I couldn't see to the end

‎

[Pre-Chorus]

You remind me of the flowers in my garden

the comfort of my home

of the hours that I've spent, learning love, and letting go

I haven't had much time to feel it

as the world enters the cold

but you're the only flower that stays warm under the cover of snow

‎

[Chorus]

Snow White

A princess who didn't need a knight

A girl who didn't what it was like

to be treated right

Oh Winter I know that you'll fight

‎

Snow White

I'll wait for you day and night

the only flower that blooms in the moonlight

Oh please tell me you're alright, Winter

My Snow White

‎

[Bridge]

My hands are frozen

I can't

Tell if you know this, wherever you are

But I choose you, and I chose this

I choose to remember

I choose to feel the pain

I choose to make sure no one ever forgets your name

I choose to feel the emptiness, I choose to be afraid

I choose to remember, every single living day

‎

Oh, I choose to love, Oh I choose the rain

I choose the downpour, over the mundane

Oh I choose all the broken pieces you left of me

And I choose to love you anyway

‎

[Pre-Chorus]

you remind me of the flowers in my garden

the comfort of my home

of the hours that I've spent, learning love, and letting go

I haven't had much time to feel it

as the world enters the cold

but you're the only flower that stays warm under the cover of snow

‎

[Chorus/Outro]

Snow White

A princess who didn't need a knight

A girl who didn't know what it was like

to be treated right

Oh Winter I know that you'll fight

‎

Snow White

I'll wait for you day and night

the only flower that blooms in the moonlight

Oh please tell me you're alright, Winter

My Snow White

‎

REEEEEEEEEE TY BYE <3

tag list: @cerenoya @just2bubbly @nightmare-not-neophyte @cinderswrench @shelbylmkaider @crescentchat @shellyseashell @healing-winston-pratt @gingerale2017 @winterrhayle @salt-warrior @cindersassasin @purpl-cryptid @of-stars-and-ships @strawberry-seraph @thestarryeyedsapphic @genyasafingf @starry-tea-party @swirlsngirls @rapunzelfromthemoon @sexy-dumpster-fire

#SoundCloud #zephyr sings #the lunar chronicles #tlc #tlc songs #the lunar chronicles musical #scarlet benoit #winter hayle #winlet #marissa meyer #tlcfemslashfebruary2022

49 notes · View notes

from-a-reckless-writer · 4 years ago

Note

as a prompt: these stupid hats w lena, kara, and alex respectively

disclaimer: i wrote this at 12:30 am running on the sugar high of an ice cold ovaltine drink topped with salted caramel ice cream that tastes more like salt than caramel and all of this was written without proofreading and prior research, so...read at your own risk.

Alex wanted to burn the picture. She wanted it out of her sight. She wanted to see it up in flames until it has disintegrated into a million pieces. But...Kelly said she can’t. So, there on the mantel above the fireplace of their home stands a framed picture—a stupid picture, in Alex’s perspective—with Kara grinning in the middle, Lena on her left wearing a shy smile, and Alex wearing the biggest scowl on her face, arms crossed as Kara slung both arms around her and Lena. The three of them wearing the most stupid caps in the history of stupid caps.

See, there’s a story behind said stupid caps with the stupid captions on them. It was Nia who gave them the stupid caps. Two weeks after Alex told them the story...

A story Alex wishes no older sister ever has the tragedy of experiencing.

It started with a phone call in the middle of the night, as every good tragedy story starts with.

Kelly shakes her awake, "Babe, your phone s'ringing," she slurs sleepily. The shrill ringing finally breaking through Alex's sleepy stupor.

Who the fuck calls at 2 am? It was an unknown number which made Alex's heart rate speed. Oh God, what if something’s happened to their mother?

"Hello?"

"Hello, is this Alexandra Danvers?"

It was too formal for a call in the middle of the night. Oh God, it's a hospital isn't it? Oh fuck, fuck, fuck—

"Uh, yes, yes this is Danvers, speaking."

She tries to keep the panic in control.

"Ms. Danvers, this is Officer Brooke of NCPD, your sister, Kara Danvers, is now currently detained in our precinct for—"

Alex mind decided to dissociate the moment she heard the words; public indecency, bail and misdemeanor.

“Thank you for informing me, officer. I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

Because, WHAT THE FUCK?

You know that moment when something just shitty happens, and your body just goes into robot mode? Alex searching her bag and wrangling for her keys is what wakes Kelly up.

"Alex? What are you doing? Where are you going?"

How do you tell your girlfriend that your sister and her girlfriend couldn't keep it in their pants, and now, she has to bail them out for acting like two horny teenagers?

Good God, this is a PR disaster, if one—just one paparazzi—caught wind that Lena Luthor is sitting in a cell right now, with about five other drunks and one kid whose pushing drugs, the media would have a field day.

“Uhm, I have to go get Kara from a precinct. It’s a long story, babe. Go sleep. I’ll tell you in the morning.”

“Oh my god, precinct? What happened? Is she okay?”

Kelly bless her heart, was concerned about her sister’s wellbeing. Meanwhile, all Alex wants to do was punch the shit out of her. Never mind the fact that it would probably harm Alex more than Kara, but she’s fucking pissed. This is so stupid, of all the fucking bad decisions that would land Kara Danvers in jail, it’s public sex.

She doesn’t need this shit.

“She’s okay, don’t worry,” Alex utters, thinking, Well, she isn’t gonna be okay once I’m done with her.

“Go back to sleep, promise it’s nothing big. I gotta go now.”

***

“Alex!" Kara exclaims, behind bars. That's a sentence she'll never thought she'd associate with Kara. "Thank Rao, you’re here, we--”

“WHAT THE FUCK WERE THE BOTH OF YOU—" Alex pauses mid-yell, when she sees Lena stumble behind Kara, "Are you drunk?!!”

“Oh my God, I swear to God, I’m going to die early because of your bullshit.”

Alex played the “I have the number of the Chief of Police and I can get your badge suspended since I am also the Director of a covert government agency, if you do not give me my sister and her girlfriend, right this instant” card. And now, she’s faced with a blushing Kara and an apparently still very drunk, very disheveled looking Lena Luthor.

“We’re sorry!!”

“Oh, oh you better fucking be sorry, you’re telling J’onn I need my brain bleached tomorrow morning. Public indecency for fuck’s sake. You’re a billionaire couldn’t you have just called your driver?!”

“Oh, uhm well, uh we kind of uh I kind of--”

Oh my God, Lena Luthor is into exhibitionism.

“Fuck. Okay, fine, whatever you’re forgiven I don’t give a shit anymore,just please shut up and please, please do not talk to me for the next 48 hours. Both of you. Understood?”

***

Apparently, Lena dragged Kara to Al’s claiming that, Kara what you need is a good drink. When’s the last time you experienced even a mild buzz?

And so, to the bar they went. Lena sending her driver home for the night, knowing that the both of them would be staying out late, and she can definitely just call an Uber or something, or maybe Kara wouldn’t really get drunk and they can just fly home.

But none of those happened. Instead, what happened is Kara getting wasted like never before, and Lena going down right along with her. And as usual as things go with these two, an innocent kiss outside the bar quickly escalated into something...more.

And now, here they were blushing and unable to look Alex in the eye in the back of Kelly’s car. Alex couldn’t exactly pick two drunk women with her bike could she?

She really didn’t know a person can be capable of feeling this much rage and exasperation but apparently, it is so very possible.

The moment they arrive at Lena’s place, she doesn’t even tell them goodbye or acknowledge their sorry’s and thank you’s, she just stares ahead, knuckles white around the steering wheel as she hears the car door close.

***

“It’s a very funny picture, Alex,” Kelly whispers in her ear, hugging her from behind as Alex glares at the newly-framed photo.

“That wasn’t a fun night, and this isn’t a funny photo. It’s a traumatic reminder, Kelly.”

“Stop being dramatic. It’s a cute photo. Nia really captured the essence, you know?”

Kelly lets out a laugh at Alex’s knitted eyebrows, once she spins around in her arms to face her.

“They better call Nia the next time they get arrested.”

“You think there’s gonna be a next time?”

“Kelly, it’s Kara and Lena. There’s gonna be a next time.”

#Fics ill prolly regret writing come morning #supercorp #the reckless writer writes #a prompt #rcklss writes

171 notes · View notes

wowbright · 3 years ago

Text

Fic: Another Universe

Tan Hands and Tan Lines Sophisticated Word Challenge 2021: benevolent

Words: ~ 1650

Rating: Teen and Up

Summary: Kurt lets himself imagine.

I’m back with more vignettes from my Mormon!Klaine universe for ... The Tan Hands and Tan Lines Summer Event 2021? This vignette takes place between Firefly and Invisible. So if you've read those, you know this one's going to end badly. (I promise you, they really do get together in the end).

My Mormon!Klaine Masterpost.

Notes: Well, this is interesting. I started writing for today's Klaine Advent 2021 prompt, but three quarters of the way in, I realized I needed to write out this part first. (Wow needs to write parts of a story in order? Who’da thunk it?) I'd been planning to start working on Tan Hands and Tan Lines prompts eventually, so how about now? I went to the first word and wrote from there. I expect to be back to Klaine Advent 2021 tomorrow—I already have a lot written for today's prompt, so there's that.

Other notes: P-day is the half day off missionaries get once a week. Garments are underclothes worn by Mormons who have been through the temple endowment ceremony. The garments have embroidery on them that symbolizes covenants made in that ceremony. There is a brief reference to one of those covenants, so if that's going to offend you, don't read this.

Do I need to warn for internalized homophobia, or do you just assume that?

If you have any questions or typo corrections, feel free to use my ask box!

--------

At intermission, their plan was to become erudite by reading the program and the performer biographies posted in the lobby. But Elder Anderson’s eyes kept wandering over to the snack bar, hovering longingly over its pictorial menu of ice cream novelties.

“You want a treat?” Kurt said. It was the least he could offer in return for such a delightful evening. With their nametags off, Kurt in a skinny necktie, and Blaine in that cute little blue bow tie covered with musical notes his brother had sent him before Easter, Kurt almost felt like he wasn't a missionary—that he was just some random American who had relocated to Germany for more sophisticated reasons like attending college or taking an engineering job at Audi (not that Kurt had any desire to be an engineer, but any identity other than missionary would do for this evening).

Elder Anderson’s eyes lit up. “That would be delightful.”

As he paid for them both, Kurt felt a thrill at his daring. It was almost like being on a date: dressed in their best, holding hands in the dark, and now this.

Yet it had none of the danger of being on a date. It was impossible for Kurt to fall. It would take two for that to happen, and Elder Anderson lacked the natural inclination for this particular type of transgression.

“There you go, Elder Anderson,” Kurt said, handing him a pre-wrapped ice cream cone. They went outside on the balcony to eat. The spring air felt warm and balmy, though Kurt knew the same temperatures in September would give him a chill.

“I was wondering,” Elder Anderson said, watching Kurt take a bite of his cone before he started on his own. “I know it's not P-day, but it's kind of like P-day, and I just thought … Maybe we could do first names? Just for tonight?”

Kurt’s heart skipped a beat. He knew he shouldn't say yes. He didn't care. “Of course, Blaine.”

“Thanks, Kurt.” Blaine brought the cone to his mouth and wrapped his lips around the ice cream protruding out of it. He made a soft but still audible sound of delight as he sucked it into his mouth. Kurt had to look away.

Oh, how great the temptation would be if it were real.

Kurt gave a small prayer of thanks that it could only be play.

And oh, did Kurt play! He let Blaine hold his hand again when they returned to the theater and the cello did its beautiful, heart-rending thing. He let Blaine keep holding onto it even after the cello had stopped, replaced by clarinets and violins and a waterfall of other, less haunting sounds.

They sang on the way home, an odd but inevitable-feeling mashup of hymns and pop music and show tunes. They discovered that Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing took on a whole new life when crossed with the Black Eyed Peas’ Where Is The Love.

They stopped at a traffic light and Blaine gave Kurt an odd look. Not a bad one. But like he was confused, or surprised, or had gotten a glimpse through the veil.

“What?” Kurt said in a pause in the lyrics, still bobbing his chin to the beat playing in his head.

“Your singing,” Blaine said. “It’s like the cello.”

Kurt’s brain melted.

The light turned green.

It took several minutes for Kurt to recover. He sang and pedaled on automatic, trying at first to ignore how that was the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to him and would likely ever say to him. But as his brain came back to him, he realized he must never forget it. He needed to hold onto it so that, in desperate, lonely times, he would remember this connection he'd once had to another soul, and how that kind of connection would be possible once again in the world hereafter.

What would Kurt’s life be like if the church hadn't circumscribed his path? What if he had been born into another family, in another universe, and never heard of the church? What if, somewhere out there, that other version of him was gloriously alive, riding his bike in an alternate Ingolstadt with a handsome man by his side? That brave, free version of Kurt wouldn't invest his heart in unavailable men the way this universe’s Kurt always had. That other Kurt would have gone on at least one date with Chandler, and it would have been fun, and then they would have decided they were better off as friends. And just as that reached its coda, a gorgeous, perfect man who was very much like Blaine (but actually gay) would appear in his life, and Kurt would never date anyone again. Because that would be the man Kurt would marry.

The church taught that our knowledge was small compared to God’s. That the revelations contained in the scriptures were only a fraction of what could be known. That was why God sent prophets and the Holy Spirit — so that as the world changed and more people became worthy of his truth, we could receive new guidance and new revelations for moving forward.

Wisdom came to us line upon line, precept upon precept. Wasn't it possible that the commandments constraining Kurt could be transformed by new revelation? That in another world, where the gospel had made greater progress, those chains had already been broken?

Just for this evening, Kurt was going to pretend he lived in that other world. He was going to pretend that his life was simple, that he could fall in love, and that the Savior’s benevolence was unconditional.

Kurt acted, perhaps, a little bit drunk. Not that he had ever been drunk or even tasted alcohol, but he'd had painkillers after he'd gotten his wisdom teeth removed and they sure had made him loopy. And he’d seen his Aunt Mildred drunk plenty of times, or at least tipsy, and experienced how the alcohol made her excessively cheerful in the face of the mundane.

So when he went into the bedroom and changed into his silk pajamas, and his unconscious singing of “The Pajama Game” flowed into the musical’s most-reprised song, it felt like inspiration. The lyrics felt like the words he would have sung to Blaine in that other universe—to the Blaine who was gay and loved Kurt like he needed, but hadn't come around to admitting it yet.

Kurt came out of the bedroom singing—

Hey there! You with the stars in your eyes,

Love never made a fool of you—you used to be too wise.

Hey there! You on that high flyin' cloud,

Though you've been acting cold to him,

You know your heart is sold to him.

—as if the words of the song were true. As if his companionship with Blaine were a prelude to something bigger, a time of gestation in which affection could slowly ripen into mutual desire.

It was silly, of course. Kurt knew that, especially when Blaine began singing back to him with exaggerated drama that was definitely a performance and not his heart's truth.

But still, it was lovely to pretend.

“This was such a perfect evening,” Blaine said when they returned to their bedroom. He set his non-regulation bow tie back in his drawer and patted it affectionately before closing the dresser. “I really needed this.”

“Me too,” said Kurt. “More than I knew.”

They prayed, and it was beautiful. Blaine’s prayers always were. He was the kind of person who seemed to forget anyone was in the room but himself and the Holy Spirit. He was vulnerable and open with his words, and fervent in his love for all God had given him.

When Blaine thanked Heavenly Father for the gift of their companionship as he did every night, Kurt remembered how his parents used to pray the same thing about each other.

“Thank you so much for Kurt,” Blaine said, and the name sounded sacred the way he pronounced it, like it was breath itself.

Which was, of course, Kurt imagining things. But what was the harm in imagining if it could sustain Kurt for a future without romantic love?

Once upon a time, Kurt hadn't particularly liked to hug companions before bed. But those times had changed. Kurt threw his arms around Blaine and drew him close. He embraced him like he’d be allowed to hold on forever.

“I love you,” whispered Blaine, and Kurt let it feel like a promise.

When Blaine kissed his cheek, Kurt decided he was still imagining things. He thought it could be Blaine’s nose or his earlobe or maybe that it was his mouth, but if it was that, it was only touching him incidentally, an unplanned side effect of their faces being so close together.

But, no. it was a kiss. Soft and slow and tender. And Kurt felt himself sinking into it, about to lose himself, about to disappear. He felt himself turning toward it like a flower toward the sun—toward Blaine, toward his lightly stubbled chin and his bare lips and his endless compassion. Visions flooded Kurt’s brain: his hands cradling Blaine’s face; Blaine’s hand clasping his at the veil; the two of them naked and unashamed in a shared bed, kissing and embracing and so many things more, unencumbered by garments and the weight of the Gospel. Kurt felt Blaine’s body warm against his and let himself believe he could have everything he wanted.

Thank you, Heavenly Father.

Someone moved. Whether it was himself or Blaine, Kurt didn't know. But in the movement, the small compass sewn into the front of his garment rubbed against his nipple.

The compass suggests an undeviating course leading to Eternal Life; a constant reminder that desires, appetites and passions are to be kept within the bounds the Lord has set.

Everything went cold.

#tan hands and tan lines #spaceorphan’s sophisticated challenge: benevolent #wowbright writes fic #mormon!klaine #klaine fanfiction #my tan hands and tan lines 2021

22 notes · View notes

uwuwriting · 5 years ago

Text

Hawks, Bakugou w/future children

Request: Hey I love your writing so much 💕 can you do future children with Bakugo and Hawks? - @toshiiiiiiiiii

Writing the last future children prompt was amazing. I like writing about them so much. Sonce I’ve already written for Hawk’s kids before and I’ve given them names we’re just going to roll with those names. Hope I don’t disappoint. Love ya.💖💖💖

warnings: fluff and maybe some crying.

Hawks/Keigo Takami

-He was on patrol, just flying around when he was hit by something square in the chest.

-It knocked the air out of him and he began coughing....and falling....pretty fast.

-Realizing that he was about to hit the side of a building, he spread his wings and maneuvered his body, shielding the thing clinging to his coat with his arms.

-He landed on a nearby roof and let out a scream when it wiggled in his arms.

-Looking at the CHILD in his arms for the first time, he immediately noticed to the little red wings on their back.

-A giggle erupted form the ball of golden locks and it looked up at him with large e/c eyes.

- “You didn’t dodge daddy! I’m faster than you!”

-He almost dropped the small girl at the word ‘daddy’.

-Eyes like saucers and with no oxygen in his lungs he looked at the girl more closely.

-A mini you with some of him sprinkled on top.

-She ruffled her wings, leaning back into his chest and nuzzling his jacket, her small fists grabbing the flaps.

-Keigo didn’t know what to do for the life of him.

-He was standing on a roof with a kid that literally fell from the sky and looked like his lovechild, how couldn’t he NOT panic?

-He looked at the little girl again only to find her fast asleep, her thumb in her mouth and it made Keigo’s heart flip in his chest.

-She was just so adorable.

-Wrapping his arms tighter around her in order to shield her from the cold air, he took off again heading for your shared apartment.

-He forgot everything about his patrol, the only thing on his mind was you.

-The family you would create, judging by the girl currently using him as a bed.

-And the little girl he would eventually have.

-Oh he couldn’t wait.

-Landing on your balcony, he found the door open -as it always was when he was on patrol- and slipped inside.

-He was met with a really messy living room and happy squeals coming from the bathroom.

-Readjusting the child in his arms as she stirred slightly, he walked to the bathroom door and opened it.

-There you were, ruffling the hair of a h/c boy who was sitting on the sink, giggles emitting from both of you as the boy tried to grasp your wrists.

-The boy was the first to notice him and he shouted an excited ‘Daddy!’ as he hopped down and ran to him.

-Right on cue, the girl opened her eyes and looked around, her eyes landing on your form and making grabby hands at you.

-The two kids switched adults in a matter of seconds.

-They both nuzzled into the respective ‘parent’.

-You look at Keigo and just winked at him, scooping the little girl up and taking her to the bedroom.

-All four of you cuddled on the bed for about an hour after which Keigo had to return to the skies.

-The next morning you were the first to wake up and so you made breakfast for the three of you.

-You knew that Keigo would be home soon and you would have to figure a way to undo the affects of the quirk that sent the twins here.

- Kai, the eldest of the two, had explained through his sobs that they were both hit by a time travel quirk during a villain attack that happened nearby.

-You had also learned that him and Daia, always got into trouble and Keigo always told them to be extra careful while out in public.

-They didn’t listen of course and so they ended up here.

-As they ate you patiently waited for Keigo to come home.

-You had much to talk about.

-Exciting things will be said and done.

Bakugou Katsuki

-He was returning to the dorms after an intense work out.

-He was sweaty and gross all over and he couldn’t wait to take a cold shower.

-Maybe make something to eat.

-And maybe cuddle you.

-He was so invested in his daydreaming of you that he didn’t hear the sounds of explosions approaching him.

-That was until those same explosions were by his ear and the figure just passed him with ease not sparing a glance his way.

-He was taken aback so much that he had to stop walking and stare as the relatively small floating figure drifting further and further away from him.

- “TOO SLOW YOU OLD BASTARD!”

-Did-did that lil shit just?...

-Boy is running after that arrogant nobody like there’s no tomorrow.

-However it turns out that they’re fast and shit hits the fan when they starting making fun of him again.

-Katsuki swears he can see red.

-They chase each other for about an hour.

-After that the smaller figure starts losing speed and finally Katsuki tackles them to the ground.

-That’s when he realizes that they are way smaller than him, almost like a child.

-Not almost....it IS a child.

-The little boy groans as it rolls off of Katsuki and shakes his ashen locks to get all the dust out of them.

-He was panting heavily, sweat running down his forehead as his arms were wobbling dangerously.

-Katsuki could tell that he would soon fall flat on his face by how much his arms trembled, so before he could collide with the ground he wrapped an arm around the boy’s stomach and lifted him up.

-He began to walk towards the dorms with the boy in his arms like a satchel.

-The boy had gone limp, mainly due to the overuse of his quirk and because it was wayyy past his bedtime.

-Bakugou made a beeline to his room once inside, ignoring Kirishima’s greetings and texting you to meet him in his room.

-Laying the boy on his bed and throwing a jacket over him, he quickly used the bathroom and changed into something less...sweaty.

-After that he waited for you to arrive.

-It wasn’t curfew yet so you could roam freely so it didn’t take you long.

-You hadn’t managed to knock twice before Katsuki opened the door and yanked you inside.

-You were about to scold him when you noticed the small lump on the bed.

-Your gaze switched between Bakugou and what you realized was a sleeping child.

- “I have to take a shower. Stay here with him...please.”

-Okay now Bakugou saying please is even weirder that the child currently sleeping on his bed.

-He promised that he would explain what he could after his shower.

-And like that you were left alone with a sleeping five year old.

-You were scrolling through your phone when you heard whimpers coming from the little human.

-Immediately, you sat on the bed and brushed some of his hair from his forehead and rubbed small circles on his back.

-He woke up shortly after with tears in his e/c eyes and he looked at you, absolutely terrified.

-In a flash he lunged at you, wrapping his chubby arms around your neck and his little legs around your waist, more whimpers and sniffles coming from him.

- “I-I’m s-sorry mommy! I-I don’t know what happened!!”

-You were shocked at his words but pushed all your questions back, opting to whisper sweet things in his ear and rocking him back and forth.

- “It’s okay baby. I got you.”

-His whimpers turned into sobs and he began trembling in your grip.

-You kissed his head and stood up, bouncing him and trying to calm him down.

- “I-I’m scared mommy!”

-Katsuki was outside the door, resting his forehead on the door frame as he heard every single word.

-He could hear your soft coos and reassuring words as well as his...son’s?? cries.

-He could barely keep up with everything but he managed to grasp the door knob with trembling hands and twist.

-He was greeted with your back facing him and a pair of watery e/c eyes.

-Wordlessly he closed the distance between you and he placed one hand on your shoulder and another on the boy’s head.

-Surprisingly, he made grabby hands to Katsuki who *shocker* obliged, taking the boy into his arms and whipping away the tears.

-After Tatsuo calmed down, you two managed to get some information out of him.

-You decided to take him to the recovery girl in the morning.

-Until then, all three of you snuggled together on Katsuki’s bed.

-You on the left, Bakugou on the right and Tatsuo in the middle, securely in his parents’ arms.

TAG TEAM AY:

@brattyquirks , @the-arcana-fan-fic

#hawks x reader #hawks #mha hawks #keigo takami x reader #bnha keigo #keigo x you #my hero academia keigo takami #bnha bakugo katsuki #bakugou x reader #mha bakugou #domestic bakugou #domestic hawks

3K notes · View notes

theimprobabledreamersworld · 3 years ago

Text

Day 2 of Loceit Week!

I enjoyed writing this one, based on the prompt ‘Aftermath’ :) It can be seen as platonic or romantic, I’ll leave that up to you :) And yeah, there are quite a few Doctor Who references in this one... I like Doctor Who! <3

Hope you like it!

@loceitweek2021

Writing Taglist: @psychedelicships @jwillowwolf @red-imeanblue @lost-in-thought-20 @the-duke-of-nuts @writerwithtoomanyships

Read on Ao3!

‘The Aftermath’

Logan and Janus. Warning for mentions of arguments, overwhelmed emotions and upset moments.

Word Count: 1,565

Janus sighed as he heard a soft tap on his closed room door. If he opened the door to find Remus there eating spaghetti through a straw for the third time this week alone, he felt like he was going to scream. He… loved Remus platonically, he truly did, but there’s only so much of his crazy behaviour he could handle in a short space of time.

He put down his book and apprehensively shuffled opened the door. Uncharacteristically, he was surprised to see Patton standing there, he was staring at the floor and his eyes bore a sadness that Janus had never seen on his face before. I mean, come on. The guy was the literal embodiment of sunshine and lollipops. It was sickening sometimes, but seeing him so drastically sad, that was even more unbearable.

“Patton?” He tried to get him to raise his head, but he refused to look up from the floor. Normally, he wouldn’t have cared, but this shows that something serious has happened.

“You need to go to Logan… w- we had a fight! I said some things I regret; and he won’t talk to any of us. I- I know it’s a lot to ask, but you’re my only hope. I- I need to know that he’s okay.” Janus just stared as the tears cascaded down Patton’s face, and his heart pounded as he thought about the notion of Logan sitting in his room alone. Knowing Logan, he probably wasn’t doing okay and despite the cold persona he puts on, he wanted- no, needed, to go help Logan. He cared about him too much to let him go through this alone.

“I’ll take care of him. It’s going to be alright, Patton.” He put a hand lightly on Patton’s shoulder before walking briskly to Logan’s closed door.

Janus took a deep breath and tapped three times on the blue door with one Doctor Who quote in the middle of it written aggressively in pen. ‘Good men don’t need rules. Today is not the day to find out why I have so many.’ He wasn’t okay. Janus just hoped he’d be able to do something to help.

“Will you all just go away?!” Logan shouted at his closed room door. Janus couldn’t help but step back. The anger was powerful; and Logan’s voice was shaking ferociously. It was clear that his emotions were overwhelming him. Janus knew he needed to get to him as soon as possible, he couldn’t stand hearing him so hurt.

“Sorry, darling. I’m afraid you won’t be able to get rid of me that easily.” He spoke softly, hoping that Logan would hear that he was being genuine under the snarky tone. He could practically feel the hesitation from this side of the door.

“Please, Logan. As much I love the fact that I haven’t upset you for once, I can’t stand hearing you so hurt. Let me help.” He tried to keep the sarcasm in his tone, but his voice began to break towards the end; and he heard Logan sigh. He could also hear sniffles as the door opened a miniscule amount before footsteps shuffled back to the bed again. Janus pushed the door open and slowly made his way to Logan. He smiled gently as he sat on the corner of Logan’s bed and Logan raised his head up slowly.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Logan shook his head vigorously and Janus nodded, letting him know that it was okay. He saw Logan’s hands shaking so he shuffled closer and held out his hands in between the two of them. Logan looked puzzled, before putting his hands on top of Janus’. Immediately, he could feel that he was starting to calm down, the anger was slowly dissipating. He just held Logan’s hands and rubbed his thumbs across the back of them, with anyone else, this would have been an uncomfortable silence, but that was never the case between the two of them, no matter what they were doing.

“I’m here, Logan. I promise. I will stay here for as long as you want me to be.” He smiled sincerely and was overcome with surprise when Logan moved his hands away and launched himself at Janus into an unexpected hug. As he buried his head into Janus’ neck, he held him a tight as he could. He rubbed his hands up and down his back while Logan sighed, almost debating whether he should talk or not. Janus didn’t mind though, he was starting to feel okay and that was the most important thing.

“I’m sorry… I’ve never been this consumed by emotions before. I always try to distance myself from them, they distract me. When I let things get to me, it makes me… weak.” Janus gripped onto Logan harder, he just needed to hold him, so he knows that everything is okay. He also wanted to say something, something that would get through to Logan so he knows that emotions aren’t a bad thing. They’re absolutely not a weakness. A lightbulb moment erupted in his mind as he remembered the quote on Logan’s door, he knew what to say.

“Letting it get to you. You know what that’s called? Being alive. Best thing there is. Being alive right now is what counts.” Logan pulled himself out of the hug and looked at Janus with a surprised look on his face.

“Doctor Who reference? Fantastic.” He laughed and Janus smiled back when he saw how relaxed Logan had become, that made him feel a lot better as well, even if that was a selfish thought… He didn’t care at this point.

“Yeah… I totally didn’t steal your Season 6 boxset last month… I wanted to watch Doctor Who so I had something to talk to you about.” He looked at the floor and a small blush spread across his face at the admission he just made, and Logan just beamed even more.

“I wondered where that went… But I don’t mind. It’s nice that someone else wanted to watch it to talk about it with me… It’s nice not being called a joke for once too.” Janus felt a small flicker of anger when he heard the hurt in Logan’s voice. He faced Logan and gently lifted his head with two fingers so he was looking into his eyes.

“Now normally, I would give some kind of sarcastic quip as a response, but even I know that this isn’t the time for that. Logan. You are not a joke. You are smart, logical, talented, you keep the order. You stop everyone from doing things they will regret later on. You have saved the day on so many occasions, it would make anyone’s head spin. Sure, mistakes have been made from time to time, but everyone does. No one can be perfect… but you, Logan… You’re the closest thing to perfect I have ever known.” They both smiled gently at each other and Logan buried his head in Janus’ chest once again. They stayed that way for a few minutes before Janus leant back to ask Logan a question.

“How about I go and get that boxset from my room? We could watch it for a little bit? If you want me to stay with you that is.” He stood up while Logan nodded excitedly, and as Janus saw the sparkle return to Logan’s eyes, he knew everything would be okay.

“Could you… could you quickly give a message to Patton? Just tell him that I’m okay, and I’ll talk to him tomorrow.” Janus nodded and ran up to his room so he could get back to Logan as soon as possible. He scribbled a note to Patton as he found the DVDs and on his way back, he pushed the paper under the lighter blue door. He saw it being taken and could hear Patton sigh in relief. His work was done. He opened Logan’s door and he was taken back by everything he had done in the space of five minutes.

“Well, you have been busy…” He looked around and saw a galaxy projection on the ceiling, string lights around the bed which turned it into a T.A.R.D.I.S-like fort. It was amazing. Logan patted the bed and Janus put the DVD into the TV before lying down next to him. As the first episode began, Janus smiled as he saw Logan miming all of the words. As he gradually began to move even closer to Janus, he lifted his arm up and scooped Logan close. This felt nice, and both of them knew that this is exactly what Logan needed… and deep down, it’s what Janus needed too.

They moved through season after season, laughing and crying together at everything that was going on. By halfway though Season Eight, Janus could see that Logan was starting to get tired as he desperately tried to keep his eyes open. He put his hands though Logan’s hair and softly stroked it, reassuring Logan it was okay to fall asleep if he wanted to, he was safe. In the silence, one part of the episode rang out in the room…

‘Love is not an emotion. It’s a promise.’

As Janus looked down at the now sleeping Logan, he knew what he felt and that he would be keeping a promise to Logan. Always.

#loceitweek2021 #ts janus #ts logan #loceit #platonic loceit #or romantic if you'd like to interpret it as such #ts fanfic #sanders sides fanfiction #fluff #hurt and comfort #doctor who references #tw argument mention #tw overwhelmed emotions #this was fun to write #:)

37 notes · View notes

giuliafc · 3 years ago

Text

Betrayal Chapter 6: Chat Blanc

<< 1 -- 2 -- 3 -- 4 -- 5 -- 6: Ao3 || FFN -- 7 >>

Written by: JuliaFC

Beta: Coffeebanana

Summary: Alya and Nino go back to school and Marinette and Adrien have a good talk.

Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by (c) Thomas Astruc, TS1 Bouygues, Disney Channel, Zagtoon, Toei Animation. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

Written for the "Snippet July" challenge of the Miraculous Fanworks Discord server @miraculousfanworks AND for LadyNoir July @ladynoirjuly Day 17 — Mistake/secrets. Let me know what you think!

oOoOoOoOoOo

Alya looked at her watch. "It's time to head back to school, guys," she exclaimed. "We have literally the time to walk across the road." Alya and Nino stood up, and Adrien released his transformation and made to stand up too, but Marinette, after releasing her own transformation, grabbed his leg and signaled him to sit down.

"We'll be late back to school, M'lady."

"I know… can you cover us, Alya? I have something to tell Adrien and it can't wait for patrol." She waited for Alya to give her a thumbs up and drag Nino down the trap door. When they were alone, Adrien sat down next to her, looking confused.

"What did you want to talk about?"

Marinette took a big breath. "We promised last night to tell each other everything." She looked down and took firm hold of the material of her jeans. "I had no idea how hurt you were because I kept secrets from you, Minou. The pain I saw in your eyes last night when you found out that I told my identity to Rena before you was an eye opener."

"Well, yes. I didn't like that. Especially finding it out when we landed on her balcony and asked for her help."

Marinette's eyes filled with tears. "I'm really sorry, that was a huge mistake on my part. I…was breaking down badly and needed a friend."

"But I'm your friend too," muttered Adrien. "You always said that Chat Noir was your partner and your best friend. I tried to help, to initiate the talk, but you pushed me away. But... it's okay, I understand. Kinda."

More tears fell out of Marinette's eyes. "I'm sorry Adrien. I…"

He cut her off. "We've fixed the issue now, Marinette, it's fine." He grabbed hold of one of her hands and she squeezed it firmly.

"It's not. I can tell that you're still hurt. I told Master Fu so many times that I didn't want you kept out of the loop. Yet, as soon as I take over his role, I make the same mistake." She dropped his hand and cupped both hers on her face, starting to sob. "I was so scared! I tried to protect you, but instead I just made things worse and I was nearly going to cause the very thing I was trying to protect you from!"

"What do you mean?" He put a hand on her shoulder and used the other one to gently take her hands off her face and tilt her chin to look him in the eye. "You're scaring me now. What were you protecting me from?"

"Chat Blanc," said Marinette listlessly. Then she noticed his confused frown and sighed. "Do you remember St. Athanase's day?" Adrien nodded. "That day I made a silly mistake and used my Miraculous for personal gain to deliver a present to your room, right to your bed."

"Yes, something from a fan in Brazil, you said? I tried to find out who gave you that parcel, to thank them, but I was never able to."

"Of course you weren't. It was a lie." She blushed to the roots of her hair when he pouted and folded his arms to his chest. "Th-the present was from m-me."

"I had seen your signature on it, but I thought somebody had commissioned the beret from you. I didn't think it was a personal gift for me, Marinette. Had I known, I would have worn it every day. It was exquisitely made."

A shadow of a smile popped on her lips. "Thank you. Initially I had signed the card that I left with the present, but when I came out of your room, not noticing that you had come in right behind me, Bunnyx appeared and brought me to this horrifying future where you had been Akumatised." She paused at his gasp.

"W-why…?" he muttered, but she cut him off.

"I don't know. Bunnyx was adamant that I shouldn't know more about it, but somehow by seeing me getting out of your room as Ladybug and finding a present from Marinet—"

"—with hearts embroidered on it!" he thought aloud.

"Uh, yeah, that…" She blushed darker. "Of course now it makes sense that you had worked out my identity, since it was, well, you. But until yesterday I had no idea and when you called me Marinette and you attacked m—"

"I attacked you?" he shouted. "I'd never make myself hurt you or fight you, M'lady!"

"You were an Akuma, Adrien." She cupped her hand to his cheek and gave him a peck on the lips when she saw the panic in his eyes. "You'd destroyed the world. Nothing was left. I was turned into an ash statue, and Papillon had followed the same fate. I think you may have been the only living being left. You'd even destroyed the moon."

Adrien considerably paled.

"You attacked me because you wanted my Miraculous to make the Wish and bring things back to what they were…before."

"Before what?"

Marinette looked down. "That's the bit I don't know. You said that 'our love had done this to the world'."

Adrien gasped and his complexion became even paler. "I-I was an Akuma though, right? You can't really trust what an Akuma says?"

"That was my mistake." She met his panicky gaze with her sad one. "I pushed you away to protect you. I…tried to shelter my heart from you the best I could so I wouldn’t fall in love with you. But…I failed miserably at that too. And felt terrible about it. So I pushed you away even more, and nearly caused the very Chat Blanc I didn't want to cause. I'm so sorry."

Adrien blinked as his heart sped up. "Wait a second, did you imply what I think you were implying?"

Marinette smiled shyly as her gaze dropped. "Yes, Minou. I also fell for you twice."

To be continued… day 18

-----------------------------

Author's Note

There you go. Chat Blanc is out of the way. This prompt was so good for it, I couldn't ignore it. I know it has been done and redone but… it fit perfectly!

I hope you liked it and will leave me a comment. You know that comments are my bread and butter!

Until (hopefully) tomorrow, bug out!

#miraculous ladynoir #miraculous love square #miraculous lb #miraculous les aventures de ladybug et chat noir #miraculous adrien #miraculous ladybug #miraculous #miraculous nathalie #nathalie sancoeur #ladynoirjuly2021 #miraculous fanworks #post rocketear #post chat blanc #chat blanc discussion

23 notes · View notes

some-kindofgnome · 4 years ago

Text

august slipped away

i. ii.

Otherwise known as the Thanksgiving fic.

characters: mirio x f!reader

wc: 2.6k

warnings: smut (18+ please!), quirkless AU, angst, Thanksgiving long-distance woes, mirio’s very ugly little subaru

notes: Happy Birthday @drapetomaniac! I’m so glad I was able to get this finished on time. I’m so grateful to have met you on this lil site, so consider this my birthday gift to you! 💖 This serves as a part ii to my Kinktober fic “with autumn closing in.” It got ANGSTY. I hope you love it.

on the prompt: “It’s November – the month of crimson sunsets, parting birds, deep, sad hymns of the sea, passionate wind-songs in the pines.” This beautiful line was written by Lucy Maud Montgomery, a wonderful Canadian writer, in her novel Anne of the Island, published in 1915.

MASTERLIST

Mini Prompt Event!

It’s November – the month of crimson sunsets, parting birds, deep, sad hymns of the sea, passionate wind-songs in the pines.

Despite the traffic, the drive into your hometown’s been remarkably quiet. You’ve hitched a ride with a friend, and with Starbucks in your cupholders and weeks worth of laundry piled into her trunk, you ride back in near-silence.

She knows what’s on your mind as she pulls off the exit, the all-too-familiar sign that marks your hometown sending a rush of anxiety straight to your gut.

You’re not looking forward to this weekend as much as you should be. You miss your family- your parents, your dog, your bedroom- but there’s another gaping question mark that fills the rest of the weekend, too harrowing to ignore.

Mirio.

After a very tearful goodbye at the end of the summer, things were good between you. You texted all the time and called him whenever you could. You even wrote letters back and forth in the first month of the semester. Mirio’s were never decked out in stickers or lavish penmanship like yours were, but they teared you up all the same.

But college is difficult. And you’re both starting this year, so it’s been a lot for both of you to adjust to. You and Mirio always kind of sailed through high school without too much extra studying, so the amount of work it takes to do well in college has been a massive wake-up call.

It’s putting a strain on your relationship with him. Slowly, at first.

You were too busy with papers and assignments to call during the week, but he was too busy with practices and games and training to call on the weekends. The letters dwindled in frequency and then ceased altogether. Now you’ll go days without hearing from each other at all.

There’s never been a doubt in your mind that long-distance was going to be difficult. But you’re pretty sure it’s not supposed to feel like this.

Your friend drops you off in the driveway and squeezes your tight shoulder. She promises you that it’s going to work out, one way or the other. Then she pulls away to continue to her own city and you climb up the front steps with two garbage bags of laundry in your hands.

You’re attacked by your ecstatic dog at the door, and your mother doesn’t follow far behind. The house is already fragrant with the spiced aroma of baking pumpkin pies, and your mother cries as she hugs you tightly. So do you.

A few minutes later, with your first load of laundry spinning away, you flop onto the couch. To your delight, there’s a text from Mirio. You’re kind of hoping to see him tonight, but you’re not sure what time he was planning on getting into town. Still, a text from him seems promising.

Home yet? It reads.

You’re trying not to let it show that you’re brimming with happiness.

Just got in, you text breezily, curling your knees to your chest with a little smile tugging at your lips. It feels so good to talk to him again here, knowing you’ve got nothing but time to spend with him this weekend.

You text back and forth a little bit, soft little messages about how good it feels to be home and how glad you are that he got home safe. The last message you type out feels indulgent but so good, and you send it with every expectation of an immediate response.

Wanna come over?

Read 7:12 pm

Dull silence persists from your phone. One hour goes by. Two hours. The temptation to send him another message is overwhelming. You’ve been well past the point of avoiding double texts for as long as you can remember.

But this feels… different. Like you shouldn’t bother him. Like, somehow, that’ll only make the silence worse.

So you don’t. Fair enough.

The next day, you’re up to your elbows helping your family get ready for dinner. Your mom has an unfortunate habit of pulling out the stops, but the meal turns out fantastic. Dealing with your extended family is as draining as always, but you’re texting Mirio every so often under the table and he seems happy enough to respond.

You think about bringing up his sudden disappearance last night, but figure he’d been preoccupied with his family. Tonight, his texts are in good spirits.

It’s not until you’re curled up in bed with a belly full of turkey that you try again.

Wanna do something tomorrow? I have brunch in the morning, but I could meet you after.

Read 10:36 pm

Nothing.

Fool me once, you don’t want to let yourself think. But Mirio’s pretty good at putting his phone down when it’s time for bed, so you tell yourself he’s just gone to sleep. He’s gone to sleep and in the morning you’re going to wake up to a sweet little text from him with fresh plans from the afternoon.

Unfortunately, the trend continues. You catch and hold his attention for a few messages a time every day, but every time you mention meeting up in person, you get radio silence. It’s gotten to the point where you know it’s on purpose, and yet every time you fail to confront him, your embarrassment deepens.

Mirio doesn’t play games with you. It feels wrong, to have him jerking your heart around like this. But you give him the benefit of the doubt all weekend.

Finally, it’s Sunday. Your washed, folded laundry is packed neatly in the hallway. You’re finishing up dinner and your family knows, at this point, to keep quiet about Mirio.

You’ve given up on seeing him entirely.

As your family cleans up, you try one more time. You know you shouldn’t. You have every expectation of being treated the same way you have all weekend- why should this time work out any differently?

But you do it anyway.

Hey… I know you might be busy with family stuff, but we’re both going back tomorrow so tonight’s kinda the last chance I can see you…

To your surprise, just a few minutes later, you get a reply,

Want me to pick you up?

Within half an hour, his familiar little Subaru is waiting for you in the dark. Your heart clenches tightly, watching him parked in the driveway. You haven’t seen him in months.

You’d expected a happier reunion.

Still, there’s a sort of lightness that tugs at your heart as you pick your way down the front steps. You tug open the passenger’s side door- the inside of the car is toasty from the rattling little heater that’s always smelled just a little bit burnt.

Mirio has a sad sort of tired smile on his lips, but you can see the relief in his gaze. You’ve almost forgotten what he looks like in real-time like this.

“Hi,” you gasp, almost shyly. You tug the door shut and he shifts the car into gear. You can’t help the little clench of anticipation you get when he puts a hand on the back of your seat to glance over his shoulder.

When he looks back at you, he looks a little brighter.

“Wanna get some coffee?”

He takes you through the Starbucks drive-thru and buys you both iced coffees. The ice rattles cold and sweet inside the cups as he drives you out of town, taking you up the winding road to the point. Neither of you says a thing. You haven’t planned a thing, but you don’t need to.

As you draw closer to the familiar little lookout, your stomach tightens.

Something feels very wrong about the way he’s treating you. By the time he pulls off the road and rolls along the battered gravel path, you’re almost in tears.

You should’ve seen this coming the first time he left you on read. Mirio’s never left you on read before.

“Well,” you mumble, your heart pounding in your throat. You know you’re going to regret this, but it’s killing you to sit in silence. You reach into the centre console and grab your coffee, shaking it weakly in front of him.

“At least you bought me a coffee before breaking up with me.”

Mirio reacts visibly in the dark next to you.

“What?” He looks over, dark eyes shining with betrayal. His blonde brow is firm and set, but there’s genuine surprise in his expression.

“Break up with you?” His voice is trembling. “W-why would I-“

Now you feel even stupider. The tears come, hot and fast and unrelenting. Your next words come in a pinched sob.

“Why wouldn’t you?” You’ve cried like this in front of him before, but this is the first time it’s ever seemed embarrassing.

“I tried to see you all weekend, all I wanted was to see you.” You’re sniffling wildly, and you knee open the glove box because you know he always keeps tissues there. “I missed you so much and-and you wouldn’t even talk to me.”

He whimpers your name, quiet as a prayer. He’s tearing up, too, gripping the steering wheel tightly with his face screwed up in pain.

“I’m sorry,” he croaks. “I was… I thought…”

He’s pausing like you’re going to interrupt him, but you don’t. He bows his head, continuing.

“I was afraid to see you,” he confesses, “because I thought you wanted to break up with me.”

The relief you expect doesn’t come. Instead, a deeper, sicker pain wraps itself around your heart.

“Why would you think that?”

“Because you don’t talk to me anymore,” he ejects. “Not in the same way. I… I know you’re busy, and I know I’m busy, but… things just felt different. Ever since Homecoming, I-I just…”

Homecoming was the one weekend that Mirio had been to visit you since the summer. That was a reunion that felt as good as it was supposed to. You’ll never forget bounding out of your residence hall to find him there, leaning against the edge of his little car like it was a souped-up Harley Davidsen. You’ll never forget the way he laughed when you launched yourself into his arms.

But that was where the bliss had stopped.

Homecoming was a bad weekend for him to visit. You should have seen that coming. You were busy with your brand new friendships, hopping from party to party. And though you were both all smiles when he was climbing into his car again on Sunday night, you’d known he left feeling a little neglected.

“Mirio,” you sob, reaching for him. You pull his eyes to yours with a hand under his jaw- a little unshaven, scratchy- and his cheeks are wet with fresh tears of his own. “I missed you like hell. I love you. I mean that every single time I say it. And I-“

You hate this kind of thing with him. Neither of you takes conflict very well. And though there have always been fights, this is the largest reckoning you’ve ever had.

“I had so many plans for us this weekend,” you admit, and the hurt takes over. Because no matter how you resolve this, that’s time that you can never get back. “And now I have to go back tomorrow and so do you and this is all we’re gonna have.”

“I know,” he sniffles right back. His voice is weak. Trembling. You haven’t seen him like this since his dog died, right after you graduated high school. “God, I-I… I’m so sorry.”

He’s reaching for you now, winding his arms awkwardly over the centre console to pull you close. You have to lean way over but you do, burying your face into the chest of his jacket.

You both sob openly, for nobody but yourselves.

“I don’t want it to be like this,” you plead. “I don’t want to be fighting for things to feel right. I can’t take four more years of this, Mirio, I can’t.”

He’s stroking a palm down the back of your head now, burying his nose into your hair.

“It won’t be,” he promises. “I’m gonna try harder. I’m gonna- I promise.”

“It’s both of us,” you reply. Your voice drops as you start to, slowly, regain control. “It’s me too. I need to try harder, too. I don’t want it to end like this.”

You nose your way to the surface, peering up at him. You both look ridiculous, faces pinched and teary. But none of that matters when you’re leaning up and he’s leaning down and he’s kissing you, all soft and loving in that way that used to make you melt.

It still does.

You let it grow heated, let yourself grab him by the cheeks and pour all of the desperate longing you’ve been doing into this kiss. It becomes very clear to you that you’re not going to be getting out of this car a single woman. And relief spreads warm and gooey through your gut.

“I wanna,” you whisper, pulling back with your eyelashes fluttering. Mirio cups your cheeks and warmly swipes the last of your drying tears away. He leans in and nuzzles the chilled tip of your nose with his.

“You sure?”

You bite your lower lip and shoot him a quiet, sly little nod.

This time, when you climb into the backseat together, no blankets or pillows are waiting for you. But you don’t care. You let him splay you across the narrow back seat, hitching one knee up over the backrest and stretching the other one out alongside him.

It’s a good deal colder this time around. And you can’t wait to get to each other. Your clothes are barely shoved out of the way by the time he’s nudging his stiff tip against your folds. You’re pushing the long hem of his sweatshirt out of the way for him, and he looks down at you with such determined adoration that you wonder why you ever doubted his love in the first place.

He eases into you slow and gentle, just like the first time. Very unlike the second time, harried and rushed under the covers of your rickety dorm bed.

You drag his lips to yours while he bottoms out inside you, wrapping that free leg around his hips and keeping him buried tight.

He fucks you just like that, in deep, tiny little strokes that nudge the tenderest parts of your belly and send pleasure trickling right down your spine each time. He kisses every part of your skin that he can reach, whispering his devotion to you over and over and over again until his voice breaks. Until all he can do is grunt and sigh and shake above you as he pours his climax into you, bringing you to a quiet little peak beneath him.

You stay tangled for a long time, despite the cramps quickly developing in your forcibly angled limbs. He lays between your thighs, listening to your heartbeat as your lazy fingers drift through the sweat-damped strands of his golden hair.

“Hey,” he murmurs warmly, lifting his chin to find your eyes. “I wanna drive you back to school tomorrow, okay?”

“What?” You frown. “Mirio, that’s two hours in the opposite direction for you. Don’t-“

“Please,” he insists, and something in his tone makes you stop. He slides his hands up your sides. “I want to. I didn’t… I should’ve seen you more this weekend. Let me. Please?”

You give a breathy little laugh, laying your head back against the edge of the seat. Your heart throbs with that all-too-familiar warmth.

“My mom’ll be pissed,” you tease, and you feel him grin against your chest.

You’re going to be okay.

#mirio x reader #mirio togata x reader #lemillion #mirio togata #mirio #my hero academia #mha fanfic #boku no hero academia #lemillion smut #angst #bnha

157 notes · View notes

superfanficnatural · 5 years ago

Text

Reunion

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Male!Reader

Summary: This is a request from @aflamboyanceofgays, “Virginity loss, cut off by John, meet up many years later at a bar, reader thinks Dean is just straight and before was just a “phase” so he accepts the invite to the bunker but doesn’t make a move on him, Dean’s feelings come back stronger and stronger and after a few nights at the bunker, he “goes in for the kill” as I would like to say it.” I hope I wrote this to your likings!

A/N: I actually really enjoyed writing this, there is a lot of cuteness in this but also some good ol’ smut. As always, I hope you enjoy!

Word Count: 7.5K

Warnings: Angst, Heavy Fluff, Smut, NSFW 18+, Fingering, Oral Receiving (Male), Anal Sex, Cute Sex, Rough Sex, Swallowing, Rimming, Marking, again, some others that I can’t think of.

Italics are thoughts

Gif isn’t mine

Dean Winchester, the boy who had stolen your heart the moment you laid eyes on him. Spiky brown hair, a goofy yet perfect smile, green eyes that you lost yourself in every single time you looked into them. You were only about 15 when you had initially met, Dean being 16. Your parents had died during a hunt and John took you under his wing, nurturing you as a father, but if you were honest, he was more like a drill sergeant. You knew that you liked Dean, more than a friendly way; but you didn’t know if he liked boys, so you kept it quiet, admiring and daydreaming about him from a distance.

Two Years Later

“Come on, Y/N! What’s the worst that could happen?” Dean asked, reaching out his hand, silently asking you to take it and go with him. John had been out for a hunt for the past few days and Sammy had just fallen asleep. He wanted to go out and get some drinks, then get drunk together.

“Dean, we don’t know when John is gonna be back, plus, we aren’t even old enough to buy alcohol yet!” you exclaimed, nervous.

“It’s fine, he’s not going to be back until at least tomorrow, and about that,” he reached into his pocket, flashing an ID, “Got myself a fake ID, says I’m 21.”

You laughed and shook your head, “Oh my god, Dean, you didn’t.”

“Indeed, I did. Now come on, don’t you want to have some fun and spend some time with me?” he asked with a soft and pleading look.

You could never say no to him, “Fine, let’s get going then.”

You grabbed his extended hand and felt electricity course through your veins. The smile you returned made his grow bigger, pulling you out of the hotel room and bringing you along to the drug store a block away.

“Alright, just wait out here, I’ll get us the good stuff,” he promised, letting go of your hand and entering the store. You had already begun to miss the warmth his hand provided. After a few minutes, he came back out with a black bag and what seemed like a really big bottle of alcohol inside.

He flashed you a cheeky grin, “Got us some whiskey.”

You smiled and asked, “Where are we going to drink it?”

“Back in the hotel room, duh,” he replied, making a silly face.

You chuckled and walked side by side with him back to the motel room. Opening the door and walking inside, you noticed Sammy still sleeping peacefully on his bed in the far end of the room, bringing a smile to your face. That kid was always such a heavy sleeper, not used to the hunter sleeping schedule just yet. Sitting down at the table next to the door with Dean, he tossed the bag aside and pulled out the bottle, getting up and moving over to John’s extra duffel he left behind, pulling out two glasses for the both of you.

“You really came prepared, didn’t you?” you asked, amused.

He shrugged with a smile, “Saw them sitting there yesterday, gave me the idea.”

He sat back down and poured the both of you a drink, clinking your glasses together you took a sip.

“Jesus, this ain’t too bad,” you said with a slight grimace on your face.

Dean recoiled, “Holy hell this shit is strong!” with a huge cringe, coaxing a laugh out of you.

“How the hell can you drink it so easily?” he asked, exasperated.

You shrugged, “I don’t know, it’s pretty strong but I guess I can just handle it easier.”

He looked a bit jealous and you chuckled, “Aw, is little Bean mad that I’m better than him at something?”

“Shut up,” he grumbled, a slight smile on his face from the nickname you gave him.

The both of you continued drinking, reaching the end of your second glass, you were very close to being very drunk, while Dean had finished his as well with a slight sway to his head.

“You doing alright over there?” you asked, trying to hold back your laughter.

“I’m doing perfectly fine,” he slurred, “Let’s play a game, truth or dare.”

You smirked, “Why not? Who starts?”

“I’ll go first, truth or dare?”

You thought for a second, “Dare.”

He smiled, “I dare you to take another sip of the whiskey.”

Chuckling, “That’s it? You suck at this game Winchester.”

“Just shut up and do it,” he replied, face falling slightly.

You grabbed the whiskey by the bottle and took a nice long sip, the burn in your throat providing warmth to the rest of your body.

“Alright my turn, truth or dare?”

“Hmm, no, you said it yourself, that dare sucked, so I’m asking again.”

“Fine, truth this time,” you replied, amused.

“Do you have a crush on anyone?” he asked, a slightly hopeful look on his face.

Your face went pale and your breathing ceased, staring at him like a deer in headlights. He seemed like he was about to say something but you cut him off before he could utter a word.

“Um, I- its- I don’t-” you were a stuttering mess.

“Y/N, it’s ok, you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,” he replied, his face soft and full of concern.

“No, you asked, so I gotta answer,” you took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, meeting his gaze. This was it, now or never. “My crush is...you, Dean.”

His eyes impossibly widened, “W-what? Stop messing around, Y/N.”

“I’m not... I’m not kidding,” you were reluctant to admit, breaking your gaze and looking anywhere but at him, a huge blush on your face.

“Ask me.”

“W-what do you mean?” you questioned, still looking at the floor.

“Truth or dare, ask me,” he replied shakily.

“T-truth or d-dare.”

“Dare.”

“I...” you started, wondering if you should really do what your heart wanted. Ultimately your curiosity, along with the help of the alcohol gave you the push you needed., “I dare you to... to kiss me.”

You couldn’t see his reaction, your eyes still focusing on the glass in front of you but you knew he probably had disgust written all over his face. However, before you could take it back, you saw him get up and slowly walk over to you. You picked up your gaze to see that he had a nervous look, repulsion nowhere to be found. He placed his hands on each armrest, leaning down to level his face with yours. You were holding your breath in anticipation as to what he would do. You took the opportunity of your close proximity to admire his facial features, freckles dusted across his cheeks, his green eyes shining as bright as ever. Glancing down at his lips, he did the same and you saw him lick his perfect plump ones, a shot of arousal flowing through you. He started to slowly lean in, millimeters away from your face. Pausing with nothing but a hair between the two of you, he pushed in the remaining space and connected your lips.

It was like nothing you had ever felt before, you felt exhilarated yet relaxed, giddy yet comfortable, shocked yet contempt. The suction between your lips was so perfect that you felt like they fit together perfectly, like pieces to a puzzle. So many thoughts were running through your mind, but the feel of his lips pushing against yours effectively wiped them all away, your mind blank and only able to focus on him. You reached your hands up to cup the sides of his face, gently stroking his cheeks with your thumbs. He smiled into the kiss, prompting you to do the same. He pulled away after a few minutes to catch his breath, while you were panting like a madman, the excitement and adrenaline from the kiss increasing your heart rate.

“That was...”

“Freaking awesome,” he finished, a bright smile on his face.

You were still just barely separated, but you pulled him back to you, desperate to feel his lips again. What started off as a hesitant and small kiss, turned into a heated and passionate one, moaning into his mouth, he slipped his tongue in between your parted lips, licking into your mouth and groaning at your taste. He pulled away and lifted you from the seat, ripping your shirt off and letting out a low grumble from deep in his throat, reaching down and sucking on your nipple greedily. You let out an audible gasp, the pleasure foreign yet much appreciated. You were starting to get impatient, reaching down and tugging at his shirt up, trying to get it off. He pulled away from your nipple with a ‘pop’ sound and smirked, slowly taking off his shirt so you could see his muscles rippling with the action. You moaned appreciatively, his abs and chest the sexiest thing you had ever laid eyes on. He reached back out to you and grabbed you by the hips, roughly pulling you into him, your hands falling on his strong chest. He started sucking hickeys on your neck while unbuckling your belt. Throwing your head back, you let yourself get lost in the pleasure that he was providing with his lips. He sucked hard, attacking your skin with his tongue and teeth, coaxing small moans to escape your throat.

“Don’t be too loud, Sammy is asleep,” he whispered in your ear, biting the lobe.

You nodded, unable to open your mouth for if you did, you definitely would have made a noise loud enough to wake him up. He unbuckled your belt and unzipped your jeans, pulling them along with your briefs off, dropping to the floor. He ceased his actions and lowered his gaze to your throbbing member, poking him in the thigh.

“Fuck you are so hot, Y/N,” he breathed.

You reached out and unbuckled his belt as well, wanting to mark him just as much as he marked you, forcing blissful moans to escape him, spurring you on. Releasing him from the confines of his jeans, you pulled them down to see that he was going commando. Normally, you would have made fun of him for it, but right now all it did was serve to arouse you even further. His cock stood proudly, taunting you to play with it.

You licked your lips and began to get on your knees but was stopped by Dean, “No, Y/N. I want to be inside you, we have time for that later.”

You nodded and followed him to the bed sitting down on top of it with his figure standing in between your legs. His cock was just in front of you and you couldn’t help yourself, reaching out to grasp it with your hand, you wrapped your mouth around it and started bobbing your head.

“Ngh, fuck, Y/N,” he moaned, hunching over slightly and balancing himself by gripping your hair.

He tasted incredible, his thick cock feeling perfect inside of your mouth. You went faster and faster, taking him all the way which surprised the both of you. He abruptly pulled back, “If you keep doing that then I’m gonna cum.”

“That’s kind of the whole point,” you replied, a smirk on your face.

“Another time,” he dismissed with a smile, pushing you back up the bed and towering over you. He leaned down and connected your lips once again, reaching down with his finger to tease at your rim. You slightly jumped and Dean smiled into the kiss, continuing to please you with his fingers. He attempted to insert a finger, your tight hole offering heavy resistance.

“Wait, here,” you said, grabbing his hand and pulling it up to your mouth, sticking in his fingers and swirling your tongue around them, looking directly into his green orbs. His eyes darkened and he pulled his fingers away, returning to kiss you while once again teasing your hole. The second he breached you, you tensed up and let out a moan.

Dean muffled it with the kiss, “Shhhhh, relax, I’m gonna take care of you.”

You felt your body go lax at his words, instantly complying: you trusted him with your life. He slowly continued with his finger while kissing at your neck, whispering loving words in your ear, praising you on how well you were doing. After you got used to the single digit, you bucked into his hand, the intrusion feeling like heaven. He chuckled and added a second finger, scissoring them to open up your hole. You tried to hold in your moan, a small squeak coming out instead.

“Please, Dean, fuck me,” you begged, impatient.

“I don’t want to hurt you baby, I’m not exactly small,” he admitted.

After a few more moments of fingering you, he couldn’t wait much longer so deciding that you were ready, he lined up his cock with your entrance and began to push in. At first you started to tense up once again, feeling the humongous head prodding at your entrance.

“It’s ok, I’ll be gentle,” he soothed.

You forced yourself to relax and let him in. He was moving painfully slow, his thick member stretching your walls deliciously. Slowly, he started pumping his hips, gradually inching further and further in with each stroke until he bottomed out and the both of you let out low moans. He was pressing right up against your prostate and it was driving you insane.

“Please move, please fuck me, Dean,” you breathed, ragged and huskily.

He lost all control and started thrusting into you, still being careful to not go too fast to hurt you. It felt so good, his constant stimulation of your prostate already having you seconds away from your orgasm, not even touching your cock. As he was thrusting, you wrapped your legs around his waist, silently begging him to go deeper, faster. He responded by picking up the pace slightly, your hips rising to meet his thrusts. You were biting your fist and desperately trying not to be too loud, moans spilling from your throat involuntarily. He reached down and started to stroke your painfully throbbing cock, going the same speed as his hips.

“Fuck, Y/N. Your ass is so goddamn tight, feels so good around my cock, so warm,” he growled, rutting his hips a few times, accurately hitting against your prostate. You couldn’t help yourself and let out a loud moan, instantly looking over to Sammy to see if he woke up. Dean didn’t care at this point, still thrusting into you and stroking your cock. Making sure he was still asleep, you turned back to Dean to see sweat rolling off of his forehead, his hair stuck to it, eyes dark and breathing heavy. The intense look of desire and want in his eyes was what nearly sent you over the edge. He reached out with his free hand and started pinching your nipple, alternating between the two of them.

The slight pain was the boost that you needed, “Fuck, Dean. I’m gonna fucking cum,” you whined.

“Cum for me, Y/N. You can do it,” he emphasized the last statement by thrusting in harder than before, his cock slamming against your sweet spot. Your breathing cut off and your body went still as your release squirted out of your cock all over his fingers and your stomach. Clenching the muscles in your ass with your release, it triggered Dean’s orgasm as well. Groaning a little too loud, he spilled into you, biting your neck to keep himself from making more noise. You felt rope after rope of warm cum coat your insides, the feeling of it comfortable. He slowly pulled out and gave you another lingering kiss. Grabbing a towel from the bathroom, he came over and wiped the cum leaking from your hole affectionately, along with the remainder from his fingers and cock. He dropped the towel before cleaning your stomach, confusing you, but he got on top of you and licked up all the cum, kissing you. You shared the cum between the two of you and you felt your dick twitch at the flavor, your own cum mixing with Dean’s natural taste on a whole different level. He pulled away with a blissed out and completely happy smile that made your heart swell. He climbed into bed with you and just as he was about to turn off the light, John walked in.

Your heart dropped, and you knew this was it.

“What the fuck?” he barked, seeing the two of you naked in the same bed.

“Dad, it's not-” Dean started.

“Not what it looks like? Don’t feed me bullshit kid,” he cut him off, “Y/N! Get your fucking clothes on and meet me in the car,” he silently seethed, careful not to wake up Sam as he left the room, closing the door behind him. Slowly, with tears escaping your eyes, you got up and started to get dressed.

“Y/N, please don’t cry,” Dean came up to you and hugged you.

You wanted to revel in the comfort and safety his arms brought you but you knew you had to leave, Dean’s relationship with his father being one of the most important things. Sniffling, you pulled yourself away from his arms, looking into his face and almost breaking at the broken and vulnerable look on it.

“I have to go Dean, I can’t ruin what you have with your dad,” you admitted, making your way to the front door.

Being stopped once again with Dean’s hand on your forearm, “Please, we can figure this out,” he begged, his eyes tearing up.

It was the hardest thing you had ever done in your life but you took his hand off of your arm and gave him one last lingering kiss, forcing yourself to pull away and open the door. Before you closed the door on the love of your life, you turned and took one last look, “I love you, Dean.” You could hear the sound of anguish tear from his throat on the other side of the door and clenched your fists, forcing your feet to walk over to the impala. Getting in the passenger seat, you could feel John’s anger next to you. Not uttering a word, you looked out the window while he put the car in reverse and backed out of the lot, driving away from the motel. You looked back for as long as you could until eventually you couldn’t see it anymore, a few tears silently falling from your face. The entire car ride could not have been more uncomfortable, no sounds, the radio off, and it wasn’t like you were about to strike up a conversation. You found yourself looking out the passenger side window, reminiscing about your memories with Dean. The time that you guys had a prank war between you, him, and Sammy. It was one of the happiest moments of your life, constantly laughing with each other at the ridiculousness of each prank and the reactions of the victims. Your mind then wandered to when you and Dean managed to convince John to let you guys go to a high school party, minus a few details of course. You remember the two of you having the night of your lives, the both of you already fairly popular in the school. After a few hours of some more driving, John eventually pulled into a junkyard, a house in the middle of it all, you recognized it as Bobby’s house; another father figure to you.

Parking the car, John reached into his pocket and pulled out a wad of cash, “Here, this should keep you going for a bit till Bobby helps you out,” offering it to you.

You scoffed and opened the door to get out, “I don’t need anything from you,” you spat, slamming the door and marching over to Bobby’s front door, him opening it as you reached the porch. You walked right past him, a clear indication that you were enraged, and made your way upstairs to the guest bedroom you knew he had. You could faintly hear arguing from your room, a door slamming and the skidding of tires on the gravel floor, indicating that John had left.

I hope that Dean can still find happiness, though, I know that I never will.

Twenty Years Later

You were sitting at a bar, nursing a whiskey, on the rocks. After Bobby had died, you left the junkyard, too many memories of him everywhere, so you lived on the road. Motel by motel you barely managed to scrape by in life, working as a solo hunter. Occasionally, your mind would wander to the green eyed boy who had stolen your heart all those years ago and still has yet to give it back; but you tried to wipe those thoughts from your mind before they spiraled you into depravity. You heard the bar door swing open, not paying too much attention to it, you stared down in your drink, debating whether you should have another or leave.

“What would you like, handsome?” the busty bartender asked the man who had sat down next to you. You didn’t spare him a look, not in the mood to start a conversation with anyone.

“I’ll take a whiskey, and the time you get off of work,” you could practically hear the smirk in his voice and you had to stop yourself from gagging, though you had to admit, that voice did something to you. Curiosity took over and you glanced to your left where the man was.

“Holy shit...” you couldn’t believe your eyes, “D-dean?” you questioned warily. He glanced over to you and that’s when you saw his eyes and you knew, those perfect green eyes only belonged to one man.

His eyes went wide and you could hear his breath get caught in his throat, “Oh my... Y-Y/N? Is that really you?” you could feel tears swelling in your eyes, giving him a nod.

He let out a gasp and got up out of his seat to envelop you in a hug. You reciprocated, basking in the old feeling of comfort and safety that you always felt in his arms. You could hear him let out a choked breath, squeezing you harder. You smiled and a tear dropped down your face, your happiness at seeing him once again too great for words to describe. After a few moments the two of you pulled away and you let yourself get lost in his green eyes once again, just like you used to, seeing a much harder exterior from before, a pain in his eyes that could only come from years of loss. However, the thing that was extruding the most and was written all over his face was utter happiness. You gave him a once over, damn, age has done a fucking wonder on him.

“So, Winchester, how the hell have you been?”

The both of you fell into an easy conversation, it felt like you guys had never separated in the first place. You talked about everything that had happened after you left, leaving that part out, for neither of you wanted to revisit that event. It was around three hours later that your conversation died out, your face hurting from the smile stretching your lips.

“Hey, so uh, me and Sammy found a place, we call it the Bunker, it’s our home now. Do you wanna... come stay with us?” he asked hesitantly.

After hearing that John had died many years before, you looked into his eyes to see desperation written in them, just like you remembered, you could never say no to this man. “I would love to, Dean,” you smiled.

His face lit up like the Fourth of July, “Awesome! I mean... great! Well, let’s get out of here.”

You paid for your drinks and exited the bar, “Seems you still got that damn car though,” you chuckled, looking towards the sleek black Chevy Impala.

“Of course I do! Baby is irreplaceable.”

“That action figure still stuck in the ashtray?” he nodded, “The legos in the vent?” he nodded once more. You chuckled, “I’ll follow behind you.”

You both got into your cars and you followed closely behind Dean. You couldn’t stop your mind from wandering back to the old memories you had with him, and seeing him now, talking to him, only solidified your thought of him still holding your heart. You still loved him just as much as you did when you were teenagers, if not, even more so now. The only setback was that he’s straight. If it wasn’t obvious from his advancements on the bartender, you thought you had a pretty decent gaydar, and it screamed that he was straight. As heartbreaking as it was to know that you were just a phase in his life, you were still extremely good friends and you missed him, so you would take what you could get.

Arriving there about a half hour later, you got out of your car with your duffel to see a large iron door, “Wow, this place just screams ��cozy’,” you joked, looking at him with a jokingly bitch face.

“Don’t judge a book by it’s cover, Y/N,” he smirked, making you second guess your initial thought about the place.

You followed him to the door, him pulling out some sort of key and unlocking it, beckoning you over to enter before him. Walking past him through the doorway, you noticed an iron spiraling staircase that led to a living room sort of area. Reaching the bottom of the stairs, you dropped your bag and took a moment to take in everything around you, a table in the center of the room with maps and other papers on top, chairs on every side of the round table. A library, stacked with so many books you counted around a few hundred off the top of your head. Two other exits that looked like long hallways leading to other areas of the Bunker.

“Damn, I really did judge too soon, this place is pretty awesome,” you breathed, spinning around to take in everything in the room like a child.

Dean laughed at your actions, “Told ya, come on, there’s someone that you probably wanna see.” He led you down the hallway and you walked past several doors with numbers in gold tint written on them, eventually stopping in front of one, Dean knocked on the door. You registered a voice call out, “Come in!” from the other side. He opened the door and you were met with a face you never thought you would have seen again.

“Oh my god, Sammy is that you? What the fuck? You’re huge!” you exclaimed, overjoyed that you could see the man you called a brother once again, but also surprised by his humongous figure.

“Y/N? How-Where-” he was struggling to pick which question to ask first so you took the initiative and ran up to him, wrapping your arms around his waist, for he really was freakishly tall. You could feel his chest rack with a few sobs and felt his arms wrap around your shoulders, squeezing so tight like if he let go, you would disappear.

“Holy shit, I’ve missed you so much, Y/N,” he choked. Your heart broke, for you had left without as much as a goodbye to Sammy, but also filled with happiness that after all these years, he still missed you.

He pulled away and looked you in your eyes, “I know why dad made you leave, and I understand that there was nothing to be done. I’m not mad at you for not saying goodbye, I’m just so glad that I can see you again,” he breathed. Even as a kid he could read me like a book, guess nothing has changed. You gave him an apologetic and grateful smile, turning to see Dean try and hold back his tears.

“Oh my god, Dean. Are you crying?” Sam asked, amusement lacing his tone.

“Shut up Sammy, dust got in my eyes,” he replied, slightly sniffling, leading to you and Sam laughing together.

“Come on, I’ll show you to your room,” Dean motioned to the door, walking you out, but before you could leave, “Hey, Y/N? Do you maybe wanna... watch a movie? Us three? Like the old days?” Sam asked, flailing his arms around, trying to gesture what he was saying. A genuine smile lit up on your face, remembering when the three of you would sit down at the motel and watch movies together.

“I would love to,” you replied honestly.

He smiled and waved you out of the room, returning to whatever he was previously doing beforehand.

“This is your room.”

Walking through the door Dean had kindly opened for you, you took in the decently sized room, a joint bathroom with a shower attached, and dropped your bag on the bed. Walking up to Dean, you gave him a hug, “Thank you,” you muttered into his chest, finally having a place you could call home.

He chuckled, “Anything for you, Y/N,” he breathed, hugging you back. His admission had your heart beating a little faster but you pushed it down, knowing he only meant it in a familial way.

You pulled back, “Fuck unpacking, that can wait, let’s watch a movie.”

He grinned and nodded, walking back to Sammy’s room to get him. The youngest Winchester’s eyes lit up once again when he saw you, a smile spreading on his lips. As they walked past, you followed, shoulder to shoulder with Sam with Dean in the front of you guys.

“Damn, Sammy, I’m never going to get used to seeing how big you are,” you poked.

“I’m still never going to get used to seeing you again after all these years,” he breathed, wrapping his arm around your shoulder.

Dean turned and walked backwards, “How come he can call you Sammy but I can’t?” he questioned, an adorably confused look written on his features.

“Because, Y/N is my favorite,” he stated, looking down at you and kissing the top of your head.

“As adorable as that is, and as happy as that makes me, I’m still older than you Sammy. I kiss YOU on the head, not the other way around,” you mused.

The three of you chuckled and walked into a large room with several couches and a large TV in the center of the wall, all of the couches angled towards it. Sitting down on one of the couches, Dean and Sam fought over who could sit next to you, for it was a two seater. You began laughing at their ridiculous behaviour, but it still warmed your heart like no other. Eventually Dean pulled a fast one on Sammy and sat down while he was recovering from a shove, he huffed and puffed and reluctantly plopped himself on the couch next to the two of you.

You laughed once again, “Next time, Sammy.”

Dean cheered in success, throwing his arm around your shoulder and bringing you into his side, “I win! You’re all mine tonight, hate to break it to ya,” he cheered with a cheeky grin. Even before you and Dean had admitted your feelings to one another, you were super close, hugs and cuddles were completely normal for the two of you.

You smiled, “Eh, I guess I can deal with it for a few hours,” looking up at him, your happiness evident in your face for his lighted up as well.

Opening up Netflix on the TV, “Y/N, you choose, you always had the best taste,” Sammy piped in from his seat. Dean reluctantly handed the remote over to you, having just found a western movie he wanted to watch.

“Sorry Bean, looks like I’m picking,” the old nickname fell from your lips before you could even think about it. The look of adoration in his eyes and his pleased smile telling you that he liked you calling him that as much as you did. You scrolled for a few moments before deciding to put on “Extraction” a new movie with the main star Chris Hemsworth.

“God he is so fucking hot,” you breathed, seeing his face on the cover photo. You heard Sam chuckle and expected Dean to do the same, instead finding his body go stiff and felt his heavy sigh on your head. You were about to ask if something was wrong but decided against it feeling his body relax seconds later, his arm giving you a light squeeze.

Throughout the movie, you found yourself unable to focus, being so close to Dean was distracting you more than you thought it would. His scent was intoxicating, leather, whiskey, and another underlying scent that you couldn’t quite put your finger on, but it smelled like home. His warm and muscular body touching up on you, making your mind go delirious and your pants to tighten. After what felt like forever, the movie ended and everyone started to get up.

“That was a pretty good movie,” Sam said.

“Yeah, the action actually wasn’t too bad,” Dean admitted.

“I had trouble focusing on anything but Chris’ face to be honest,” coaxing another laugh from Sam, but when you looked over to Dean you noticed his jaw clenched and his eyes darkened.

Confused, you asked, “Dean, is there something wrong?”

He smiled once more, but you knew him well enough to tell that it was completely fake, “Yeah I’m good, just a bit tired, let’s head off to bed.”

You reluctantly followed him, suspicious as to why he was acting so strange. Dean walked you to your door as you waved goodnight to Sammy.

“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow?” his hand coming up to scratch at the back of his neck.

“Yeah, I’ll still be here,” you replied, his awkwardness shocking you, for he had always been confident in everything that he did.

“Great! Good, I mean. See ya tomorrow,” he rushed, walking away to his bedroom. You shook your head with a laugh, Dean acting completely out of character. Turning off the lights and getting into your bed after placing the duffel on the floor, you laid back with your face to the ceiling. This has probably been the best day in my life in the past twenty years. After tossing and turning from excitement for tomorrow, you eventually drifted off into sleep, your dreams filled with you and Dean together.

For the next few days, the boys decided to take a break from hunting, wanting to spend time with you and re-establish your relationship, not that it wasn’t already strong. Day after day, Dean seemed to be even more attentive with you, while you weren’t complaining it was somewhat strange, it was like he was slowly becoming the same boy that night you last saw him. Reprimanding yourself for assuming Dean was actually still into guys, you shook it off and instead focused on spending some quality time with the boys. After around four days, one night when you were preparing to go to bed, there was a knock at your door.

“Hey, Dean. What’s up?” you asked, a small smile on your lips.

“Can I come in?”

You stepped aside and let him enter, closing the door behind him. He turned back to you and it seemed like he was struggling with saying something, opening and closing his mouth a few times like a fish out of water. After a few moments, you heard him mutter, “Fuck it.”

The next thing you knew, you were pushed against the door and his lips were on yours. At first you were surprised, eyes wide and lips still before you let yourself fall into it, wrapping your arms around his neck. The kiss feeling just like it did back when you were teens, but so much better. He had more experience, as did you, and it seemed like he poured all of it into the kiss, desperately trying to impress you. He pushed up the rest of his body on yours, rubbing his prominent erection against your thigh, prompting your own member to begin to harden. You moaned into the kiss and he took control of it, sliding his tongue into your mouth.

“Fuck, you taste just as perfect as you did all those years ago,” he moaned, returning to the kiss.

The similarity to the first time you had made love to each other threatening to burst your heart with nostalgia and happiness. You roughly pushed him off of you, earning a dark glare and a rumble to come from deep in his chest. You smirked and took off your shirt, playing with your waistband, slowly lowering them just above your pelvis, pulling it back up just before he could see anything then repeating the action. He was glued to the spot, eyes intently watching you like a hawk, his eyes told you that he liked what you were doing. Becoming impatient, you took off your pants, but left your underwear on, reaching out to tug on his waistband, pulling him towards you. You sucked on his neck and nibbled on the small space underneath his ear, gaining a low moan from Dean. Rubbing him through his pants, you continued your assault on his neck, making sure to leave marks that were clearly visible, wanting everyone to know that he was yours. He grunted and grabbed your bruisingly by the hips backing you up until your legs hit the bed and you fell, sitting down. He took off his shirt and you took your sweet time appreciating his body, toned arms, chest so large, it looked like the comfiest pillow you could ever have. He smirked at your reaction and slowly peeled off his pants along with his undergarments, his cock bouncing out of its confines, inches away from your face. Once again, the scene around you flashed to the exact moment that Dean stood in front of you like this all of those years ago. However, he was sexier now, more rugged, muscular, cock about another inch and a half longer than what it already was, making your mouth water. You bit your lip and reached out with your hand, tugging him closer to you with his large member as the anchor.

“Last time this happened, I told you to suck my cock another time, well now is the time,” he graveled, reaching out to grip at your hair and using his other hand to guide his dick into your mouth. This time, you had no intention of teasing, all the years of waiting for this exact moment fueling your want and desire for him. Wrapping your lips around the tip of his head, you instantly pushed down, going as far as you could before popping off with a gasp of air. You wanted to please him so you pushed your limits, relaxing your throat and pushing all the way down until his pubic hair was pushing up against your nose.

“Ohhhh fuckkk, Y/N. Nobody ever managed to suck this cock as good as you, always the best at everything,” he moaned.

His praise gave you the confidence boost to continue, bobbing your head forwards and backwards, forcing small moans and whimpers to fall from his lips.

“Fuck, I’m close, I’m gonna cum,” he whined.

You pulled away for a second, “Cum, Dean. Let me taste you,” returning to your task, you gave it everything you had, using your other hand to massage the area between his hole and his sack, making his legs start to quiver and his breathing to pick up.

“Oh shit, just like that,” he started pumping his hips into your mouth, chasing his own release. After a few more pumps, his hold on your hair tightened and he thrusted one last time, “FUCK Y/N!” he called out, pouring what felt like a gallon of cum into your mouth and down your throat. He released your hair and took a step back, his softening dick falling out of your mouth as you swallowed the last of his load down, palming yourself through your boxers to relieve the tension, his taste extremely arousing.

“Holy shit, that was amazing,” he breathed, chest heaving with the deep breaths he was taking.

He reached into his sweatpants on the floor and pulled out a tube of lube, “Did you seriously come in here thinking I was gonna fuck you?” you asked, a slightly annoyed look on your face.

He gave you a toothy grin, “Well, I was right wasn’t I?” Your eyes nearly rolled to the back of your head. He placed the lube on the side of the bed and roughly grabbed your legs, manhandling you onto your stomach, the pressure from his fingers leaving marks behind in their wake. Tearing off your underwear, he wasted no time in shoving his face into your ass, tongue fucking into it, spreading your cheeks with his hands.

“Oh fuck Dean! Shit, that’s so good,” you whined, gripping the bed sheets so hard your knuckles turned white. He was relentless in his assault, stretching a few fingers from his hand on your ass to tease your rim, rubbing circles around it.

“Dean, please,” you begged, voice faint and weak.

“I’m going to take care of you, Y/N. I got you.”

He grabbed the lube bottle and squeezed some on your ass and his fingers, the cool liquid making you jump slightly. He chuckled and resumed his task, slowly inching in two fingers into your tight opening.

“Fuck, Y/N, you’re still so damn tight,” he groaned, pushing his fingers in until the knuckle and fucking into you.

“Shit! That feels so good Dean!” you moaned, squeezing your eyes shut and scrunching your eyebrows in pleasure. After a few more minutes of fingering you, he pulled out and you heard the bottle of the lube open up, turning back to see him pour a generous amount over his cock and lathering it, already just as hard as it previously was.

“I’m gonna fuck you, hard,” he growled, grabbing your cheeks and roughly squeezing them, forcing them open so his monstrous cock could fit inside. He started slow, pushing in with the head, stretching you so incredibly, giving you a sense of fullness. After the head was fully seated inside, you thought he would continue the slow pace, but instead he shoved the rest of his cock in one sharp thrust.

“FUCK!” you screamed, the sudden intrusion splitting your ass into two. He chuckled darkly before pulling out where just the tip remained and repeated the motion, another loud moan ripping out from your throat. Continuing, he began to pound into you relentlessly, the bed creaking, threatening to break from the sheer strength of his thrusts. His hands were placed on your hips, guiding them back and forth onto his cock as he rotated his hips and pushing into you. At first, it was mostly pain, but your walls eventually widened to accommodate his large size and you began to call out in ecstasy rather than pain, his cock reaching what felt like your stomach.

“Take my fucking cock, that’s it, such a perfect hole, mine, and mine only,” he growled, accentuating each word with a thrust. He was filling you up delightfully, moans of pleasure and need falling from your lips. He snaked an arm around your chest and pulled you up level to him, the new angle hitting your g-spot delectably.

He bit your ear, “Who do you belong to,” he grounded out.

“You! I belong to you, Dean. I’m yours!” you whined.

“That’s fucking right, mine,” he growled possessively, pushing your head back down into the bedsheets, your ass still elevated, providing an even better angle for him to push into you.

Your moans were muffled by the bedsheets, “Fuck, Dean, I’m gonna cum,” you moaned.

“Cum without touching yourself, cum on my cock,” he commanded, grabbing your wrists with his free hand and holding them together on your back. You felt the string snap at his words, cumming into the bedsheets with a loud grunt. After a few more pumps, you felt him still, spilling his seed into you, filling you up with the amount of cum streaming from his cock. He pumped a few more times, sharp ruts that had you whine from the impact on your prostate. Pulling out, he used his discarded t-shirt on the floor to clean up the mess, tossing it aside and turning you onto your back. Reaching down, he kissed you softly and pulled away with a loving look on his face.

“When you left all those years ago, you said something to me,” you felt your cheeks redden, “Dean, you don’t-”

“You told me that you loved me, but what you didn’t let me do was respond,” he breathed, vulnerability shining in his mossy eyes.

“I love you too, Y/N.”

Forever Tags List: @magssteenkamp @shadowsinger11 @donnaintx

Dean/Jensen Forever Tags List: @akshi8278

Male Reader Tags: @beka-dreamer @brymalibu

#reader #dean #dean fanfiction #male reader #dean imagine #dean x reader #dean winchester #dean x male!reader #dw #dean winchester smut #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x male!reader #oneshot #angst #Angst with a happy ending #fluff #smut

532 notes · View notes

youngdreamer3214 · 4 years ago

Note

Could you do 18 from the prompt list with Speedy and Raven

Assume Standard Disclaimer

Tumblr Prompt #18. “You weren’t there for me when I needed you the most.” Warning- Angst, Hurt with little comfort Pairing- Speedy and Raven

(A/N- This is written in Raven’s point of view. Please be gentle it is my first time writing a piece of this sort.)

I hope you enjoy reading this.

0O0O

My vision started to blur, heartbeats slowed down and in that moment I was lost, confused, sad and hurt. So deeply hurt that I felt as though all life was seeping out of my veins and at an excruciatingly slow pace, reminding me of everything I had gone through, what I had lost, something which I never had. A tear slips down my cheek as my breathing becomes uneven and blood gushes out of my wounds.

As I laid in the middle of the ruins, sirens blaring in the background, my friends screaming in the background trying to get to me, all I could think about were his parting words to me.

Call me a masochist but all I could think about was his painfully beautiful smile, his breathtakingly enchanting emerald eyes which would never look at me the way that I wanted, like how I looked at him.

Maybe it was because I was not pretty enough, not funny enough, not interesting enough or just not enough for him. Or maybe it was because I was not her.

She, who is his priority, the one for whom his smiles are directed to, the one who he always looks at, the one for whom he leave everything behind, even me.

My breath hitches in my throat as a ray of light falls on my face and fresh air embraces every inch of the room and hope takes birth in my heart seeing a domino masked face. Maybe he came for me? Maybe I am his priority? Maybe he hadn’t forgotten about me?

But as people rush in the room, everything becomes stuffy, cramped. The light is blocked and all hope dies as I see black hair instead of his beautiful fiery hair. I realize with defeat, cursing myself to be an idiot for having hope that he would come for me. All hope leaves my body as my leader and friend picks me up in his arms cautiously saying something that I cannot hear, all I can see is his lips moving before everything starts to blur and my world goes dark.

0O0O0

I hear voices as I slowly drift into consciousness, my eyes slowly adapting to the brightness of the... med bay? I groan as my head starts to throb and my throat feels dry.

“W-water.” I manage to croak out and everything around me falls silent except for the constant beeping of the heart monitor. I see my best friend Richard rush to get water as Cyborg with great care help me sit up while Beastboy keeps pillows behind my back. Starfire hovers around me with a worried expression on her face. I see my team filling the room as my eyes slowly open fully and without hurting.

And my heart starts to ache when I don’t see the archer in the room, confirming what I already know, that he doesn’t care enough for me to be here.

I try to shift my focus from him to my friends, who I am so grateful to have in my life and offer them a smile full of gratefulness as I see the relief on their faces.

“You scared us there, Rae…” Richard says with relief evident on his face as he pulls a chair to sit next to my bed after helping me drink water.

“Yeah, don’t do that to us again please…or who would save us from greenie’s jokes?” Cyborg, my dear big brother said trying to lighten the serious mood but I could feel the high levels of relief emitting from him. Beastboy agreed till he realized the remark made at him and gave an offended, making me laugh inwardly “Hey! Raven loves my jokes…don’t you, Raven?”

I just gave an unimpressed look to him, trying to hide my smile as my mind shifted to my friends and how thankful I was that I had them in my life.

It was not until later that Cyborg told me that I had suffered from several wounds, some of them being burns and a fractured leg but the most worrisome was the wound on my head which was the reason I had difficulty healing myself and the reason why I was in critical condition until and unless I woke up.

He advised me to not move out of the med bay for at least till tomorrow and that for at least three weeks (depending on my healing) I was to not take part in fighting crime. The latter to which I protested relentlessly but my friends were firm on this decision and I ultimately gave up when Starfire gave me her watery eyes.

I sighed and my eyes started to become droopy, the medicine showing its effect so I leaned back in the pillows and Cyborg ushered everyone out of the room seeing my state, Starfire gave me a huge but gentle hug. Well the gentlest she could be and left. Cyborg and Beastboy followed suit with the former making promises of waffles for breakfast and the latter with of a protein filled vegan breakfast at which Cyborg hit his head as they both walked out playfully fighting.

Now only Richard was left. With him only in the room my mask had no meaning; he was my best friend, my leader and the one who I trusted most in the world. He knew about my feelings for the archer and he knew all the pain I suffered because of it.

The pain of loving someone who could never see me that way, who could never think of me in that way, who could never return my feelings.

We sat in silence for a while, the beeping of the heart monitor being the only sound in the room when I asked in a low voice “Did he call?”

A small, quiet ‘no’ was my answer and I chuckled painfully, a couple of tears welling up in my eyes as I heard what my best friend had to add “Maybe he didn’t get the message…or maybe-”

“He doesn’t care.” My dejected admission stole all the words out of his mouth and he stared at me with pity, which I hated. I don’t need anybody’s pity or sympathy. So before he could say anything I looked at him and whispered, my voice coming out shakier than I would have liked “I am t-tired.”

He saw the turmoil underneath my facade like he always did, and left after wishing me a good night. I closed my eyes, hoping for sleep to take me away from the nightmares of reality.

0O0

Days passed as my body was recovering from its injuries unlike my heart which still remained broken, breaking more with each day passing when he didn’t call.

My friends noticed this as they constantly tried to divert my mind to other matters. Richard would ask me to help him in battle strategies, Starfire would make me watch some show that was trending and Cyborg would just talk with me, carefully avoiding any topic which may hurt me.

But the most puzzling of all was Beastboy, who would transform into a kitten and just lay next to me, napping or lightly purring as I gave him scratches, just offering me his support and comfort. And that was just what I needed; as much as I appreciated the efforts of all my friends, I looked forward to Beastboy’s company the most.

The shapeshifter was the only one of my friends who could understand my pain, the pain of loving someone who could never love you back again. And ever since Terra refused to recognize him, he has carried that pain in his heart; which I can often feel and now relate to.

And it was on one of the days when Beastboy was lying next to me in his cat form while I read when he entered the room, and my breathe hitched in my throat and my heart beats slowed down.

His somehow always impeccable red hair were messy, as though he had run his hand through it a lot; his gorgeous emerald eyes were hidden by his domino mask but even that mask couldn’t hide his anger as his face was flushed and his chest was heaving.

“I need to speak to you Raven” he said, his lips tight and sporting a frown which only deepened as he looked at the changeling next to me and said “Alone.”

Beastboy didn’t say anything; he lightly curled his tail around my hand while staring at the archer, showing his support. He slowly turned and looked at me in question and I lightly nodded my head so he untangled his tail from me, making me suddenly feel so empty and alone, and jumped on the ground and walked out of the room to give us privacy but not before glaring at the archer.

“What is it Speedy?” I asked not looking at him, which seemed to anger him even more as he stomped in my direction till he stood in front of me, his stance intimidating and furious. But I couldn’t bear to look at him. Just being in the same room with him was suffocating me. It was reminding me of what I couldn’t have, what I was not good enough for.

“Do you mind explaining to me, why I found out from Aqualad that you are injured instead of you telling me this yourself?” he seethed. I didn’t say anything and focused my attention on the wall behind him.

He clouded my senses, everything about him was overwhelming me. His extreme and very loud emotions were impacting my empathy, making me unable to think about anything but him.

I stayed silent, unable to say anything with his anger clouding his senses and now fueling my own. “Tell me Raven!” He screamed at the top of his lungs.

“Why did you not tell me? Am I NOTHING to you? Don’t I have the right to know, if my best friend is injured? You are an empath right? Then why do you not care about anyone’s emotions but your own! Why-”

This was the breaking point for me.

I could feel my magic waiting to erupt from my being, my second pair of eyes waiting to open and my demonic heritage wanting to overpower my human self.

“Shut up!” I hissed, my voice laced with my demon’s “You don’t get to speak to me this way, especially after everything that has happened between us.”

My heart ached again, thinking about the day when our relationship changed forever. My demon retreating in the deepest depths of my being as my pain overshadowed everything else.

“You are asking me that why didn’t I tell you about my condition but why weren’t you there for me when all this happened, when I needed you?” his eyes widened at my question.I could feel his anger drain out of his body as everything he said that day and his reason for not being there for me dawned on him.

He shamefully hung his head, the anger seemingly forgotten as he said in a voice just above a whisper “S-she…”

I laughed, cutting him off; of course it was because of her. I cursed myself for thinking that he had another reason for not being there for me. “So don’t accuse me of not caring about anybody else’s emotions, when it was you who had never cared about mine...You weren’t there for me when I needed you the most.”

A tear slipped down my eye as I looked at him saying what I promised to myself would be my last words to him, the man who was my friend, my first love, Roy. “And now I will make sure that I never need you again.” And now he will always be Speedy to me, a fellow titan.

Fin.

Please Read and Review.

Thank you.

#raven #speedyrae #roy harper #royrae #teen titans #angst #unrequited feelings #hurt #dc #dc comics #fanfiction

23 notes · View notes

seijch · 4 years ago

Text

ANNOUNCEMENT: NOT A HELLO, BUT NOT A GOODBYE EITHER

omg hi ... im like . ashamed to come back after saying brief hiatus in october and then disappearing off the face of the earth til FEBRUARY but under the cut i will be explaining myself and the following, if youre interested (and a tl;dr at the very bottom if you don’t wanna scroll thru this obnoxiously long post):

the reason(s) i was gone for so long

what i was doing during that time (its just a personal account yall can scroll past this idrc)

the status of those um . halloween requests

the future of this account

i. so . Hiatus .

i know. i know . i probably mentioned it when i made the announcement post, but my mental health likes to go on one of those rides. yknow the ones where you go like up rlly fast then down maybe and then up then DOWN .... its like that. i needed a break and every time i wanted to come back or thought about it, something would happen and i would get stuck in my own head.

a big reason for getting stuck in my head was (and i hate to admit this ... i hate to admit that i have Insecurities On The Internet) my feelings of inadequacy regarding my writing. i love to plot fics, i love concepts and characters and making little headcanons but i dont ... know if i love writing rn. and i thought for the longest time that like . whatever ill just push thru it its fine ill be fine but it kinda wasnt lmao you can kinda see it in my halloween reqs and what become of them when i get to that but i began to feel like nothing i had put out or would put out would hold up prose wise (and normally i dont feel like this im much more “idc its my life im living it” but thats not a rant for tumblr LMAO). i still feel like that -- like im better as a reader than a writer. but . You Know :-)

tl;dr: mental state go brrrrr

ii. anywhere here’s wonderwall

when i left, i was in a steadily decreasing mental and emotional state, made worse by a situation at work that really was a case of petty jealousy on my end and rlly isnt very consequential now despite how much pain and resentment it gave me when it Was a problem so i wont get into it. the tl;dr of november and december was me using work as an crutch and distraction -- i know my job, i do it well, it helped me not think about my responsibilities and obligations and inadequacies. of course, as the holiday season grew busier n busier i was scheduled so often that i moved 88 or so miles (according to my apple watch, which i ONLY wear at work since im never anywhere else outside my house) and fell into a cycle of showering n sleeping at my house before going back the next day. (theres definitely something to be said abt capitalism and “grind culture” here but once again its not the time or place snsjkdfds)

at the turn of the new year, i happened to remember a birthday card i hadnt filed away for safekeeping from a friend of mine that id been horribly out of touch with til that point. i started crying because i realized how out of touch id been in general up until that point. the month of january was great for me: i was focused, happy, and in a much better place than i had been before. the end of it brought me down focus wise and im hoping that enough time away from my distractions will refocus me bc i ... need it LMAO and though ive burned out from that level of productivity and gotten distracted again im ... trying to stay positive which i think is the most i can do 😁👍🏼

media wise, i got real into stardew valley (but burned out bc i played it extensively as a way to wind down after work), the pokemon platinum romhack renegade platinum (still havent finished it bc of school n i played it w the intent to see if i could nuzlocke it ... bitch its so hard but its so fun bc of it), briefly assassins creed: odyssey (im one of those ppl who completes an entire region before i move to the next so you can tell i burned out of that one + wouldnt have the time to properly devote to it even if i didnt), got back into genshin impact after pulling for xiao (after not touching it for like . months), and danganronpa. yes . danganronpa 😐 i Know. i stopped playing it after the second trial of the first game bc i was so hurt by the outcome and picked it up in late january only to get sucked in (thank god i had the foresight to buy the second and third games during the steam winter sale). rn im at the start of chapter 4 if anyone wants to come in my asks and um . talk to me abt danganronpa

tl;dr: I’m Into Danganronpa Now

iii. you realize halloween was three months ago right

i mentioned this in the first section, but i love to plot things. every request is plotted or at least has a solid foundation. i had fun detailing what concept i wanted to go with considering what i was given, and there were some bangers i might touch up in the future. but heres whats going to happen to the requests themselves:

there are two finished requests. one will be posted tomorrow and the other will be touched up (just bc i finished it doesnt mean its good 🧍‍♂️) and scheduled for next saturday. as for the ones i never got around to ...

i will not be finishing those requests. i hate to be That Person, but i feel like we all expected this 🧍‍♂️ what i will do is post all of my notes for each request in batches -- requests that have an @ to go with them will be mentioned in the post proper, but anon asks will be pictured. (there are some asks that came from blogs who are now deactivated but i wrote down all the prompts and remember most of those askers so ill cross that bridge when i get there) there will most likely be an excerpt or two simply bc i think i mightve written a few plot points or interactions in the form of bullet points. i rlly am sorry about doing this but i remember looking at my notion doc with all the prompts and feeling ... like i wasnt measuring up n it wasnt just to myself or to some intangible concept of “other” id constructed but it was instead to those who requested n actually WANTED to see and hear and read my writing and i ...... im gonna admit thats another big reason i avoided this site.

regardless, youll definitely get what i have (and likely more than just my bullet points and illegible handwriting).

tl;dr: im sorry. what i have in terms of plot, concept, and interaction for every request will be posted, but i cant say ill ever complete them and mean it.

iv. so what now?

well i mean . im not entirely sure how sold i am on haikyuu in the content creation department (as a creator n to a lesser extent, as a consumer). as mentioned previously, its no longer my primary focus. it doesnt mean im not into haikyuu anymore; i have a lot of love for those boys but i cant rlly say im even caught up w recent fandom activity and also havent even finished s4 pt2 LMAO thats on my to do list

and despite all that, i still want to share my plots n concepts and snippets and maybe even fics. it wont happen anytime soon. it might not even happen. but i mean . its better than me saying i wont write ever again shjdkfs but either way ill probably use this blog as a personal blog w the occasional ask game for dialogue prompts (those are always so fun i love making up aus to fit like . the most mundane prompts)

as for my works (past and any potential future), ive opened an ao3 acc here n ill be editing n possibly expanding on my old works to post there. tumblr, to me, is The x reader hub, but i figure more x reader fics on ao3 is never a bad thing.

ill be deleting/posting drafted posts to the queue since they were all meant to be queued anyway as well as (sorry again 🧍‍♂️) deleting or answering asks in the inbox. (moots if you get a notif from me saying i rbed your post from months ago ... mind your business) im very hard to get ahold of and its ... a problem. expect an overhaul of the nav n shit to reflect my new direction n also because i feel like i cant tell if my passion for carrd is shared by the majority HSDKLFS maybe its better to read my info in a normal post ykwim .......

and of course . if youve read all this n decided im no longer worth the follow, i sure as hell cant stop you. thank you for wanting to, at some point, hear what i have to say -- it means more than you think.

tl;dr: writing will be edited and reposted to ao3, this blog will be a personal blog with a hint of writing (sometimes)

the tl;dr to end all tl;drs:

im back! i wont be as active as i used to due to a lessened interest in haikyuu in general, but i have an ao3 acc now where all my past work will be edited, possibly expanded, and reposted. any future work will also find itself there. my halloween requests will be posted in batches as incomplete concepts, plots, and snippets of scenes; i wont be promising to finish any of them.

there are still fic concepts im attached to and want to finish, but i cant promise any more writing on my end. this blog will be a personal blog with maybe writing, not a writing blog with my personal thoughts all over it.

regardless if you stick around or not, its been crazy sexy cool (equal emphasis) being on haikyuu tumblr even tho i wasnt around for long ... even tho its not my main focus anymore, im still excited to see what the future might hold 🤝

love, ari 💌

#did i have an announcement tag #announcement #also regarding work hsjkdfsd the company i work for didnt give my location the opening for the full time position i wanted #my managers all agree id be promoted if we had it but we dont so i . hee .#anyway um i hope everyones doing well #some of my moots changed urls while i was away and now i have no idea who anyone is #its like when you see your familys friends and theyre like omg youre so big now! i remember when you were a baby and youre like 🧍‍♂️#and you have to play along bc apparently they remember you hskdfsd #im not very funny in this post but i figured id rather be honest considering my lengthy absence #consider this my comeback stage

12 notes · View notes

hiscyarika · 5 years ago

Note

You did so well with the last. Here’s another. 3 prompts 32: “ I came to say goodbye. ”. 13: “ Don’t leave me… ”. 78: “ Hold me and never let me go. ”. With my favorite Catfish. 💕

Word Count: ~900

Pairing: Frankie “Catfish” Morales x Reader

Prompt: 13. “Don’t leave me...” 32. “I came to say goodbye.” 78. “Hold me and never let me go.” (from This List)

Warning(s): Mentions of (Canon) Death, Angst

A/N: Hey! This is the first anything that I’ve written for Catfish, so I apologize if any of it seems out of character. I haven’t read many other fics for him either. But hopefully you enjoy this! He’s a character that I would definitely like to write more for! Thank you for sending this in! 💕

Masterlist

Tag Lists

---

You know that there’s something different about Frankie the minute he steps out of his car. You watch him from the window of your second-floor apartment, noticing the sheepish way he looks around him before he heads to the main entrance of the building. You head to the door. Just a few seconds later, there’s a beep from your call box, and you press the button to let him in.

The next red flag is how long it takes him to get up the stairs, at least, you feel like it takes him a long time to finally knock on the door. You turn the knob and open the door, trying to hide your concern, but the look on his face makes it clear. There’s something very wrong.

“Hey baby,” he greets you softly, stepping inside the apartment and closing the door behind him. Your face finally falls when you see the dark circles under his eyes. Whatever is going on, he’s losing sleep over it.

“What’s wrong, Cat?,” you ask gently, reaching out to take his hand.

He spends a few moments just looking at you, and with each passing second you feel your heart rate increase. You swear it’s ready to beat out of your chest by the time Frankie does speak.

“Baby, I…,” he starts, letting out a sigh. “I came to say goodbye.”

You stumble backwards, releasing his hand. Tears burn at your eyes and you shake your head in confusion. “W-What?,” you reply, not sure what you could have done to make him decide to leave you.

Frankie hesitates for a moment, but then he realizes what it sounds like he’s doing. He shakes his head profusely, taking you into his arms. He cradles the back of your head with one hand as you bury your face in his shoulder. “No. No. Not like that. No,” he whispers quickly, pressing his lips to the top of your head. “I love you,” he murmurs, hating that he’d scared you like that.

You look back up at Frankie once he assures you that he’s not leaving you. “I love you too,” you reply,”but where are you going?”

He sighs, pressing his forehead gently to yours. “We’re all going down to South America tomorrow morning. Pope’s got us helping him with an operation. But everything’s gonna be fine, alright? Just a few days and then I’ll be home. I promise,” he explains.

“Frankie you can’t be serious,” you retort, immediately separating from him. You sigh in frustration, raking your hand through your hair. “You know it’s never that easy with Pope. You know that.”

“It’s a week’s work and seventeen thousand dollars at least. Do you know what you and I could do with that?,” he replies, standing with his hands on his hips now.

“Frankie, we don’t need it. We’re fine. And besides, no amount of money is worth anything to me if you’re dead!,” you cry.

“For fuck’s sake. I’m not gonna die! We’re all coming back in a week. It’ll be fine.” He tries to get you to understand, though he can see it in your eyes that you’re not going to relent.

You can’t stand to argue with him anymore, so you walk away, over to the window you’d watched him from before. You wrap your arms around yourself, trying to keep yourself from losing your composure. Frankie can take care of himself, and you know Pope wouldn’t make the choice to bring everyone in on an operation where survival was slim. But you still can’t stop the fear that gnaws at your stomach.

You close your eyes when you hear his footsteps crossing the hardwood floor, letting out a breath as he wraps his arms around your waist and buries his face in your hair.

“You were finally out…,” you whisper.

“I know, baby.”

“Don’t leave me… Frankie, please,” you beg. “Hold me and never let me go.” It’s your last attempt to get him to stay. You already know it won’t work.

“Wait for me,” he pleads.

---

You’re waiting for him at the airport when they all land. There’s a pang in your chest when it hits you that Redfly really is gone. Pope had called you to let you know.

Tears fill your eyes when your gaze lands on Frankie. They all look battle-worn and grieved, but you know the haunted look in his eyes all too well. It reminds you of nights that he’d wake up in a cold sweat, unable to escape the gruesome, horrible images that had followed him home from war. You suspect that there will be more of those nights now.

“I’m glad you’re home, boys,” you tell them, embracing each of them one at a time, but leaving Frankie for last. You gasp as he wraps both arms around you, dropping his bag to the ground and holding onto you for dear life. You begin to rock slightly with him.

“I should have listened. We shouldn’t have gone. Red–”

You stop his quick, panicked words. “Shhh. Don’t do that to yourself,” you murmur to him, hoping to soothe him at least a little bit. There’s a long road to recovery ahead, but you’ll be with him every step of the way. You’ll get him through this.

“I love you,” he whispers. You feel tears soaking into your shoulder. Your own start to fall.

“I love you too, Frankie.”

---

Permanent Tags: @theforceofdarkandlight @hail-doodles @aerynwrites@murdermewithbooks @themandjalorian @longitud-de-onda @readsalot73 @lovingtheway @talesfromtheguild @mystical-934 @lavenderl3mons @tiffdawg @lokiaddicted @adikaofmandalore @blue-tidal-wave @forever-rogue @flower-petal-blooming@fleurdemiel145 @cable-kenobi @opheliaelysia @pynch-bug@pedropascalito @creamysacrilege @bandofmarvels @paryl