#more than anything I loved watching him find love
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how arcane characters would deal with mental disorders x fem reader
characters: viktor, jinx, vi, caitlyn, jayce, ekko, silco, mel and sevika.
writer's note: writing this felt like giving myself a warm hug, a comfort that i needed. if anyone reading this is going through or has gone through any of these disorders, i want to tell you that you are very brave because it is not an easy thing, so feel proud of yourself. i hope you liked this as much as i did. as i'm a psychology student, i felt very motivated and i hope that it was quite understandable and enjoyable. as you already know request are open ;)
P.S. i know the other option won in the poll on my profile, but i need more time to refine the ideas and make something high quality that everyone will love, which iâll be posting tomorrow ;)
Viktor Depression
The world around you feels like a constant weight, a heavy blanket that wraps around you, not letting you breathe. You wake up each day with a sense of emptiness in your chest, as if a black hole is absorbing all your energy, your motivation, your ability to feel anything other than sadness and apathy.
Itâs not that you donât want to get out of bed; itâs that the simple act of moving a finger feels like a titanic task. Fatigue is your constant companion, a shadow that never leaves you. Things that once filled you with joy now seem distant, irrelevant, as if they belonged to a life that is no longer yours.
The dark thoughts are your constant whispers, reminding you that youâre not enough, that itâs all pointless, that thereâs no way out. Sometimes, you cry without knowing why; other times, you want to cry, but even that you canât do. You feel trapped in an invisible prison, with no strength to fight your way out.
Viktor watches you from the doorway of your room, his gaze soft and full of concern. He knows the weight of shadows well, although his are different. Silently, he approaches and sits on the edge of the bed, not invading your space, but close enough for you to feel his presence.
âI have a new project Iâm working on,â he says in a quiet voice, trying not to break the fragile bubble of your world. âI thought maybe you could join me today. You donât have to do anything, just be there. Your company always helps me think.â
He doesnât pressure you. Viktor understands that words can be hard to find when your mind is clouded by depression. He knows that the solution isnât to force you to feel better, but to be with you, to offer you a hand, a small step forward.
He gently rises and offers his hand, not expecting you to take it, but hoping that youâll know heâs there, ready to support you when youâre ready. âThe world can wait,â he murmurs. âBut Iâm here, whenever you want to come back.â
His patience is infinite, his understanding deep. Viktor doesnât try to fix you, because he doesnât see you as broken. He knows that depression is a battle you fight every day, and heâs willing to walk alongside you, every small step, every shared silence.
You look at his hand, then his face; heâs concerned even though he tries to hide it. You make a huge effort to get out of bed, and even though your body doesnât cooperate at first, you manage. You take his hand and gently squeeze it; thatâs the most affection you can give him right now, youâre exhausted.
âLetâs go,â you murmur, your voice hoarse and broken; itâs the first time youâve spoken all day.
Youâre sitting next to Viktor in his small workshop, surrounded by pieces of metal and unfinished prototypes. Heâs explaining his latest invention, a spark of enthusiasm lighting up his eyes. You feel a little better, enough to enjoy his company, and for a moment, a laugh escapes your lips when you hear one of his stories.
âDid you really say that to Heimerdinger?â you laugh, your eyes shining with a spark of life. Itâs a small moment, but for Viktor, itâs like seeing the sun rise after a storm.
He smiles, pleased to have made you laugh. âYes, and his face... It was certainly indescribable,â he replies with a softness that reflects his pleasure at seeing you enjoy yourself, even if just for an instant.
But suddenly, without warning, the laughter turns into a lump in your throat. The spark of joy fades as quickly as it came, and you find yourself trapped in a wave of overwhelming sadness. The tears start rolling down your cheeks, and you canât stop them. The confusion in your eyes is evident, as if your body has betrayed the fleeting happiness you just felt.
Viktor notices immediately. He leans toward you, his expression turning serious, but his eyes remain warm and full of understanding. He doesnât ask questions, doesnât seek explanations that may be impossible to give. Instead, he moves a little closer, offering you his silent presence.
âItâs okay,â he says gently, his voice an anchor amidst your internal storm. âYou donât have to explain it. Just breathe.â
He offers you his hand, this time with more intent. You take it, feeling the warmth and firmness in his grip, a reminder that youâre not alone in this moment. You needed that contact. You needed to know that you could feel something other than sadness right now. Viktor doesnât pull away, doesnât feel uncomfortable. He knows that depression doesnât follow rules, that it can strike at any moment, and heâs willing to stay with you, no matter how long it lasts.
âDo you want us to stay here?â he asks, his tone delicate. âOr we can walk a little, if that helps.â
His willingness to adapt to your needs wraps you in a sense of safety. Even though the tears keep falling, Viktorâs presence is a balm, a reminder that, even in the darkest moments, thereâs someone who sees you, who understands you, and whoâs willing to stay by your side.
âJust... stay here with me,â you say, letting yourself fall against his body, exhausted.
He caught you and wrapped you with care, it was a hug with the right amount of strength.
âTake your time, darling. I wonât go anywhere,â Viktor promised in a whisper, never stopping the caresses on your back.
And that was enough to make you feel less miserable.
Jinx Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)
The echo of the explosions still resonates in your mind, even though years have passed since that day when your world crumbled. The night everything you loved was consumed by flames in an attack on the Undercity. The night you lost your family and were left alone, with the screams and the smell of smoke forever etched in your memory.
As you walk beside Jinx through the bustling streets of Zaun, everything seems normal, almost calm, until an explosion in the distance makes your heart stop. Itâs a dry, loud sound, far too similar to the one you heard that night. Without warning, your breath becomes shallow, your lungs struggle to take in air, and an overwhelming sense of absolute panic takes hold of you.
Your body freezes, and it feels as if the world around you disappears. The crowd, the lights, even Jinxâall fade away, leaving you alone in that dark place where time doesnât move. The ground beneath your feet seems to give way, and you feel yourself falling again into that abyss of the past.
"Hey, hey!" Jinxâs voice cuts through the fog in your mind. Her hands grip your shoulders, and her gaze searches for yours with desperation. "Youâre not there, do you hear me? Youâre here, with me."
Her words feel distant, but the warmth of her hands somehow anchors you, reminding you that youâre not alone. "But... the sound..." you murmur, barely audible, as tears start to fall down your cheeks. "It was the same... the same as that night."
Jinx guides you to a quieter corner, away from the noise, holding your hand firmly. "Breathe, hon, like we always do," she says softly, her voice tinged with controlled urgency. "Fill up those lungs, okay? Like weâre balloons."
You try to follow her instructions, but every time you close your eyes to concentrate, the images of that night hit you with renewed force. "Itâs not working," you whisper, trembling. "Itâs always there. No matter how much I try, it doesnât go away. It doesnât go away!" You scream in panic, the fingers of your hands stiffening, making them immobile.
The worry in Jinxâs eyes softens a little, but thereâs something else there, something you can only describe as recognition. "That explosion... it reminded me of something too," she says after a moment, her voice quieter, almost a whisper. "Iâve been there, in that fucked-up place, where the ghosts never stop screaming."
Her words are like a key that opens the door to a deeper understanding.
She falls silent for a moment, gazing into the distance before refocusing her attention on you. "When I have my attacks, youâre always there for me, and I remember Iâm not alone. That helps me a lot," she admits, a small, almost sad smile curving her lips. "And youâre not alone either, hon. Weâre not broken, just a little bent. And here we are, bent together."
The hug she offers you is warm and firm, a tangible reminder that youâre not alone. You feel her strength, her determination, and something else: her own fear, her own struggle. "You donât have to fight alone," she whispers, her voice a promise. "If you ever feel like youâre going to fall, weâll fall together. And then, weâll rise. Always."
You cling to her like a lifeline, letting her warmth and her words anchor you to the present, if only for a moment. "Thank you, sweets," you whisper, allowing yourself, for the first time in a long time, to feel that itâs okay not to be okay.
Vi Anxiety Disorder
The night drags you into the abyss of your mind, but you find no respite. Instead of waking softly to the day, you're trapped in pure panic. Your chest burns, each breath a lost battle. Your heart gallops wildly, as if trying to escape your chest. You are drenched in sweat, the sheets sticking to your skin, becoming yet another prison.
Your eyes snap open, the darkness of the room seems to close in on you, and the silence is deafening. The sensation of suffocation consumes you. You try to gulp down air, but it's as though your lungs have forgotten how to function. Your hands search for something, anything, to anchor you to reality, but all they find is emptiness.
The door swings open abruptly, and Vi stands there, alert, her eyes filled with concern. She doesn't need to ask whatâs wrong; she knows instantly. She moves swiftly but carefully, approaching you without frightening you further.
"Breathe with me," she says gently, her hands finding yours, steady yet comforting. "Inhale through your nose... like this... and exhale through your mouth."
You try to follow her, but your body wonât cooperate. Your breath is shallow, frantic, as though every breath disintegrates before it even reaches your lungs. Tears begin to streak down your cheeks, mixing with the sweat.
"Vi... I canât... I can't... Iâm scared," you stammer, your words broken by sobs. Your mind is caught in a loop of terror, every thought spiraling downward, taking you further away from calm.
Vi sits beside you on the bed, her voice low and constant. "Donât be afraid. Listen to my voice. Iâm here with you, and I wonât let anything bad happen to you." Her tone is firm, anchoring you in the present, pulling you out of the tide of your own fear.
"But it hurts... my chest... I can't breathe..." Your body trembles, and your hands clutch desperately at her grasp. The feeling of control slipping away is overwhelming, leaving you feeling helpless.
Vi pulls you into an embrace, holding you close, offering her calm, her strength. "This is temporary. It wonât last forever," she whispers in your ear. "Trust me. Focus on me."
Slowly, very slowly, her voice cuts through the fog of your mind. You begin to breathe more deeply, following her rhythm, feeling how her presence stabilizes you, like a lighthouse in the storm. The pain in your chest begins to lessen, the pressure relents just a little, and your body starts to remember how to breathe without fighting.
Vi continues to speak, her voice a soft murmur, calming you with every word. "Youâre strong. You have control, even if it doesnât feel like it right now."
The tears still flow, but now they are tears of relief, not fear. "Donât leave... donât leave. I need you here," you whisper, your voice broken but sincere.
Vi strokes your hair, her other hand gently squeezing yours. "Iâm not going anywhere, little doe," she says affectionately, kissing your forehead, tasting the salty remnants of your sweat.
You remain in her arms a moment longer, allowing yourself to rest, letting her strength hold you as you regain your own. Gradually, the panic fades, leaving only exhaustion and the certainty that Vi will always be by your side, no matter how dark the nights may get.
Caitlyn Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD)
The silence in the apartment is deafening. The only sound that breaks the stillness is the relentless ticking of the wall clock, its rhythm echoing in your ears like a hammer. Youâre in the kitchen, eyes fixed on the glasses youâve meticulously arranged in the cupboard. Each glass must be perfectly spaced, each one aligned to the exact same level. Symmetry isnât just a preferenceâitâs a necessity. If something is out of place, you feel as though the whole world could collapse.
Your breathing is uneven, your chest rising and falling in quick succession. "One, two, three..." you murmur to yourself, counting each movement. Your hands tremble, but you canât stop. You canât stop. If you do, something terrible will happen. You donât know what, but the certainty that it will be catastrophic clings to you like a shadow.
Caitlyn enters the apartment after a long day at work. Her expression shifts instantly when she sees you in the kitchen, trapped in your own ritual. She stops in the doorway, watching you with a mix of concern and sadness. Itâs not the first time sheâs found you like this, but each time, it hurts her as though it were.
"Darling?" Her voice is soft, as if afraid to shatter you. She steps closer, carefully setting her hat down on the table. "What are you doing?"
You donât answer at first, your eyes still fixed on the glasses. "Almost done... just a few more minutes," you whisper, your voice trembling. You canât stop. Every glass moved, every small adjustment is a battle between reason and irrational fear.
Caitlyn stops beside you, her eyes scanning the scene, seeing the perfect pattern youâve created. "You donât have to do this," she says gently, yet firmly.
Your hands freeze for a moment, but the urge to continue is too strong. "You donât understand... if I donât do it right, if theyâre not perfectly aligned, something bad is going to happen." Tears begin to well up in your eyes, the pressure in your chest intensifying. "I donât want you to think Iâm crazy, but itâs like my mind... it canât stop."
Caitlyn takes a deep breath, her hand reaching out to touch your shoulder delicately. "Youâre not crazy," she says, locking eyes with you. "I know this is hard, that your mind doesnât give you peace. But you donât have to face it alone. Let me help you."
You turn to look at her, your eyes filled with desperation. "I canât stop, Cait. If I do, I feel like everything will fall apart. I canât control whatâs happening inside my head."
Caitlyn nods slowly, her gaze unwavering from yours. "I know, darling. And I know this wonât be fixed in a day. But Iâm here, and Iâm going to stay by your side. Weâll face it together."
Her words anchor you, a beacon in the storm that is your mind. Slowly, almost against your will, your hands begin to lower, moving away from the glasses. The fear is still there, a current running just beneath the surface, threatening to overwhelm you, but Caitlyn is beside you, her presence a reminder that youâre not alone.
"Breathe with me," she says, her voice soft and steady. "Inhale... exhale... together."
You follow her instructions, though your lungs seem to resist, full of anxiety. Caitlyn guides you, her hand never leaving your shoulder. "See? Weâre doing it! Youâre doing it!" She encourages, kissing your neck when she notices youâve looked away from the glasses for five seconds. It was only five seconds, but Caitlyn knew it was a huge accomplishment, and she celebrated it.
You let out a small sigh, the tension in your muscles easing slightly. Your hands travel to Caitlynâs waist, moving her so the glasses are no longer in your line of sight. You let your head fall against her chest, breathing in her scent. Itâs so much better, especially when you start counting the beats of her heart.
"How brave my wonderful and glorious girlfriend is. Iâm so proud of you," she whispered, her fingers weaving through your hair as she praised you.
"Cait, I love you so much. Youâre the best thing thatâs ever happened to me," you whisper against her warm chest, unwilling to leave that comforting refuge.
Caitlyn chuckles softly, and it feels like music to your ears.
"I feel the same way, darling," Caitlyn replied, gently swaying your bodies from side to side in a small rhythm.
You know that your compulsions wonât disappear, that the need for control will remain, but with Caitlyn, you feel like you can face it one day at a time.
Jayce Narcissistic Personality Disorder
The mirror in your room is your judge, jury, and executioner. Every imperfection is a sentence, every flaw a conviction. You spend hours in front of it, adjusting, retouching, trying to reach a perfection that always seems to slip through your fingers. Your heart beats fast, not from excitement, but from the constant fear that the world will see the cracks beneath your flawless facade.
Jayce enters quietly, his presence comforting and, at the same time, a threat. What will he think? Does he notice the imperfections you see? He steps closer, his gaze soft, but you feel the weight of his eyes as if he's scrutinizing every flaw.
"Love, it's late. Come to bed," he says in a calm voice, trying to distract you from your self-destructive spiral.
"Just one more moment," you reply without looking at him, your focus still on the mirror, searching for symmetry in your features, perfection in the unattainable.
Jayce sits on the edge of the bed, watching you. "You've been here for hours. You don't have to do this. You're beautiful just as you are."
His statement, though well-intentioned, feels like a white lie. "You donât understand, Jayce," you murmur, your voice trembling with suppressed frustration. "If Iâm not perfect, Iâm nobody. I canât let them see my flaws. I can't let⊠you see them."
Jayce stands, walking toward you carefully, as if approaching a flickering flame. "You donât have to be perfect to be loved," he says, his words a whisper in the storm raging in your mind. "You donât have to prove anything to anyone, least of all to me."
Your gaze finally meets his through the reflection. Tears fight their way out, but you can't allow such weakness. "It's not that simple," you whisper. "Every day, every look, every word, itâs all a test. And if I failâŠ"
Jayce places his hands on your shoulders, his eyes filled with compassion and infinite patience. "If you fail, Iâll be here to lift you up."
"And what if Iâm not enough?" The question slips out before you can stop it, the insecurity behind your narcissism showing in all its rawness. "What if one day you realize you deserve something better?"
Jayce leans in, his forehead touching yours, a gesture so intimate it almost breaks you. "I deserve someone who loves me for who I am, not for what I pretend to be. And thatâs exactly what you are to me. I donât have impossible expectations of you. I just want you to be happy, to find peace in who you are."
The internal struggle within you is fierce. The fear of rejection, the desire for perfection, the need to be seen and admired, all mix together in a whirlwind that consumes you. But in Jayce's arms, for a moment, the noise silences. His love is not a chain, but a refuge, one that offers rest if only you can let yourself fall into it.
"How can you be so sure?" you ask, your voice broken but curious.
"Because I love you," he answers without hesitation. "And love isnât about waiting for perfection. Itâs about accepting every part of you, even the ones you think are flaws."
The tears finally make their way out, releasing something within you that has been held back for so long. Jayce holds you as you cry, whispering words of comfort, letting all the pressure, fear, and anguish flow out of you.
"Youâre perfect," you whisper, your voice cracked but full of sincerity. In your mind, Jayce is the epitome of everything you donât believe you are: strong, confident, unshakable.
Jayce smiles softly, his hand caressing your cheek, wiping away the tears still falling. "No, Iâm just a man in love. A man who loves you madly." His voice is warm, filled with a tenderness that disarms you. "Why donât you show me that precious smile of yours? Please, it would make me so happy."
His sweet words touch your heart, and the corners of your lips stretch on their own, forming a sad smile.
"Gorgeous," Jayce murmured, caressing your lips with his strong, calloused fingers.
"Flatterer," you reply with a more elaborate smile, your eyes still wet, but now with a different shine, one that reflects the spark of hope heâs ignited in you.
"Iâm just stating facts. Iâm a scientist, honey, so I can tell you that, from my perspective, itâs scientifically proven that youâre gorgeous," he commented wryly, a wit that made you laugh.
Jayce smiled and kissed your forehead, holding you firmly in his arms. Finally, you feel like you can breathe, like air is filling your lungs again without that constant weight on your chest.
Ekko Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)
The room is silent except for the soft hum of music playing in the background, but your mind cannot stop racing. Your thoughts scatter like arrows shot in every direction. You try to focus on something, anything, but it feels as though your brain is in a constant battle between the ideas that come and go. The light from the lamp flickers irregularly, and for a moment, you wonder if the bulb is about to explode. This makes no sense, you know that, but the unease lingers.
You quickly get up from the bed, taking a misstep, tripping over a chair you hadnât seen, barely avoiding it. Your heart races. Everything is a series of chaotic jumps in your head, an endless torrent of thoughts that canât follow a single path. You look at the desk, with papers scattered aboutâunfinished projects, ideas you canât ground. Everything calls to you, but you canât focus on anything.
Your hands tremble slightly as you grab the pen and begin to write down an idea that came to you, but before you finish the sentence, a new image flashes in your mind. You stop, leaving the pen on the desk and staring out the window. Something about the glow of the stars makes you think of something else. You canât concentrate. Everything distracts you, even the small noises you used to never notice. Itâs so annoying.
Suddenly, you feel the stress begin to accumulate in your shoulders. Itâs not just the lack of concentration; itâs the sense of constantly running toward something without ever arriving. You try to finish a task, but more and more thoughts pile up, projects, things that need doing. Everything seems urgent, and nothing seems possible to complete. Anxiety settles in your chest.
Youâre about to get up again when you hear the sound of the door opening behind you. Ekko enters the room, his calming presence is the only thing that makes you stop for a moment. He watches you in silence for a few seconds, noticing the frenzy of your movements. You hadnât realized, but your breathing is irregular, and youâve gotten up twice without purpose. Something isnât right.
He watches you quietly, understanding the internal struggle youâre facing. He knows what this means, what it costs you every day.
âWhatâs going on? Why are you so worked up?â he asks, his voice soft but with enough authority to make you stop and listen.
Your eyes focus on a fixed point, but you canât find the words to explain what youâre feeling. You donât know how to put into words whatâs happening. Itâs like youâre trapped in a cycle of thoughts that never stop.
âMy mind... it doesnât stop moving,â you finally manage to say, almost in a whisper. âEvery time I try to do something, itâs like something else distracts me. Nothing stays. Everything slips away.â
Ekko watches you silently for a moment, understanding the fight youâre facing. He knows exactly what this feels like.
âI get it, babe,â he responds, his tone firm but gentle. âI know your mindâs all over the place right now, but I promise we can do this one step at a time. Weâll focus on one thing at a time, no pressure. Sound good?â
The fact that Ekko is offering to be there, without judgment, brings you relief. You know that the impulsiveness you feel, the urge to move without a plan, is something that consumes you. Your mind jumps from one thought to another, and each of those thoughts feels like an urgent need, an immediate necessity. But at the same time, nothing makes sense. Everything is scattered and out of control.
âItâs just that...â your words fade into the air, unable to be completed. You feel trapped in your own body, in your own brain. You canât stop, but you canât move forward either.
Ekko gently places a hand on your shoulder, his touch calming. âHow can we start?â he asks sincerely, not rushing you. âTell me what you need.â
For a moment, everything seems to stop. The flood of thoughts quiets down, and for the first time in a long while, you can think clearly, even if itâs just for an instant. Itâs not about having everything figured out right away; itâs about feeling that someone is there, willing to stand by you while you navigate through the mental whirlwind.
âI just... I donât know how to do it without jumping from one thing to another,â you murmur, frustration and shame creeping into your voice. âI feel like everythingâs overwhelming, and I canât focus on anything.â
âWeâll take it slow,â Ekko replies, his tone calm and direct. âFirst, breathe. The first step is to breathe, and then we can start with just one thing. The rest can wait.â
You close your eyes for a moment and follow his words. You breathe deeply, slowly, trying to find the balance that always seems so hard to reach. Ekko is there, not rushing you, waiting for your mind to settle. With his help, little by little, you manage to focus on one small task, one thatâs manageable enough not to overwhelm you. Itâs just one step, but itâs a step toward calm.
âYou donât have to do it all right now,â Ekko says softly. âWhat matters is that youâre not alone in this. Weâll go step by step.â
You feel the knot in your stomach loosening, even though thereâs still much to do. But at this moment, with him by your side, you realize that maybe, just maybe, you can find a way toward a little peace.
After hours of work and soft laughter, youâre sitting on the floor, with Ekko beside you, both looking at the pieces left to place in a puzzle. Itâs almost complete, the pieces fitting perfectly, and though the hours have flown by, you feel lighter, the atmosphere quieter.
âOne more,â Ekko says with a smile, holding up a piece in the air. He passes it to you, and together, you place it in its spot, completing the picture. The puzzle is done, and though itâs a small accomplishment, it feels more meaningful than it seems. Not just because of what youâve completed, but because youâve managed to feel centered, accompanied.
When you look at the drawing you had left unfinished, now finally complete, you feel a deep sense of satisfaction. Ekko helped bring to life the image that only existed in your mind, his hands working alongside yours, following every line with care.
âYou did it,â Ekko says, his eyes shining with pride. âMy girl is incredible.â He pulled you into his lap and kissed your forehead.
You look at him, your heart beating a little faster. The fatigue of the afternoon washes over you, but you donât care. All that matters is that heâs here, by your side, and that, for once, you feel at peace. The air feels lighter, as if the space between you two has been reduced, softened by the stillness of the moment.
âThank you,â you murmur, your words barely a whisper, but full of gratitude.
Ekko turns toward you, his expression softening. âDonât thank me. Thank yourself. Youâre the one who made it happen, not me.â
The way he looks at you, the way his presence has become part of your space, makes you smile. And, in a moment of impulse, without thinking too much about it, you move a little closer. He seems to understand it instantly, and before you can second-guess yourself, his lips brush against yours. Itâs a soft kiss, no rush, no urgency, just a moment where words arenât needed.
When you pull away, both of you stay there, looking at each other, the air between you charged with something that doesnât need to be named. Ekko smiles, his eyes sparkling with that glint that makes you feel as though everything is right, as if the world, for a moment, is in its place.
âEverythingâs okay now,â Ekko says softly, filling you with calm.
And in that instant, you believe him.
Silco Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
The air in Silco's office is thick with tension, as always. The sound of the bustling city echoes through the glass windows, but inside, everything is still, almost as rigid as the gaze Silco fixes on you. You're sitting across from him, feeling a familiar dizziness, as if everything is out of control and, at the same time, you're trapped in an empty space. A mix of confusion and anxiety courses through every fiber of your being.
Your hands tremble slightly, and although you try to control your breathing, each inhalation seems to sink you further into the internal chaos. The voices in your head blend together, demanding answers, claiming something you can't give. Silco watches you calmly, but it's a cold, calculated calm, as if everything that's going on inside you is a game he knows how to play.
You feel the emptiness consuming you, and yet an unbearable pressure weighs on your chest. Your mind betrays you, throwing destructive thoughts at you, telling you you're worthless, that everything you do is doomed to fail. The contradiction is overwhelming: on one hand, you feel lost, and on the other, you refuse to give in to the feeling of helplessness.
"Are you alright?" Silco asks, his voice low and steady, but there's a slight intensity in his tone. He doesn't break eye contact, as if he's evaluating every micro-expression on your face, every movement. He knows you're not, but still, he asks. Is it a test? A need to know how far you can go? The silence stretches on, and your thoughts only intensify.
The urge to stand up and run from it all is strong. Everything in you screams to follow your impulses, to escape, to flee from the overwhelming weight of it all. But you stay there, because something in you knows that running will only plunge you deeper into the darkness you're feeling inside. You see yourself fighting, trying to maintain control, but every second makes you feel more lost.
"I'm sorry... I don't know what's happening to me," you whisper, your voice broken, struggling against the avalanche of emotions threatening to drown you. You feel the tears pressing behind your eyes, but you force yourself to keep composure. "It's just... it's all so intense. So confusing."
Silco keeps watching you in silence. There's no judgment in his gaze, only a calculated assessment, as if he's reading between the lines of your suffering. After a long moment, he sighs and stands up from his chair, approaching you slowly. It's not a sudden gesture, but calm, as if he's used to dealing with people who struggle with their own minds. He says nothing, but his presence is the only thing anchoring you in this moment.
With one hand, he takes yours. The contact is firm, but not aggressive, as if he's giving you space to breathe, but also space to not escape. In his eyes, something changes. There's an understanding that you can't fully decipher, but it fills you with a strange sensation, like, for the first time in a long time, you're not alone in the storm raging inside you.
"Your mind is betraying you," Silco says calmly, his voice soft but full of an authority that makes you feel that everything happening has a purpose. "It's an enemy that everyone must face at some point. But you don't have to face it alone."
The words fall on you like a stone, but strangely, they allow you to relax, even if only for a moment. The internal chaos you've always felt halts for an instant. And in that silence, you're finally able to breathe.
"All of this... this emptiness, the feeling that nothing matters, it's not your fault," Silco continues, his tone firm, though not without a strange gentleness. "It's just a phase, a moment that will pass. But you need to control it. Not let it take over you."
You feel vulnerable, but at the same time, a part of you relaxes in his closeness. Silco doesn't tell you that it's okay, nor does he promise easy solutions. He speaks to you with reality, with that harshness that you know comes from someone who understands suffering, but who doesn't have time to sugarcoat the truth.
"What you're feeling is real, but it's also transient. Not everything is as final as you think," he adds, his gaze fixed on yours with intensity. "You can be stronger than this."
The words resonate in your mind as you take a deep breath. You don't know if you fully believe them, but for some reason, in this moment, the darkness feels less imposing. You're not completely free of it, but at least you feel you're not entirely alone. Silco is here, firm and without judgment, waiting for you to take control of your own mind, without expecting you to do it immediately, but giving you the possibility to believe that you'll manage.
The pressure in your chest doesn't disappear completely, but a small crack of calm starts to open within you. And though you know your inner struggles won't end immediately, for the first time in a long while, you don't feel as lost. Silco looks at you one last time, without haste, but with a silent certainty.
"When you're ready, you can get out of this. I'll be here."
You're surprised by how firm his voice sounds, as if, by saying it, he's committed to being a constant presence. And although you don't fully understand how he does it, you realize that, in this moment, his steadiness helps you more than any empty words of comfort.
The world continues around you, but somehow, Silco has given you the strength to face it.
The silence between you and Silco lingers for a moment, but it's no longer the same silence as before. There's a strange peace, almost comforting, in the way he holds you, in the closeness you now feel between you both. The contact of his hand, firm and steady, gives you an anchor amidst the storm that still rages inside you.
A sigh escapes your lips without you noticing, and for a moment, it's not one of despair, but of relief. Silco, still keeping his gaze fixed on you, takes one more step closer. It's not a quick or rushed step, but a calculated one, as if he's sure that, in this moment, the only thing you need is that closeness, that calm presence.
Without saying anything, his fingers gently caress your cheek, a soft gesture that cuts through you. There's a tenderness in his movements that you hadn't anticipated, something that seems in complete contradiction with the person you know, but that, in this moment, comforts you more than any words. You feel vulnerable, but you don't fear it, not now.
Your breathing gradually calms, and Silco, silently, moves a little closer, so close that you can feel the warmth of his body. The space between you is almost nonexistent now, and you can feel his breath in rhythm with yours. There's something in his presence that soothes you, that gives you the feeling that everything will be okay, even though it still feels hard to believe.
Finally, his lips come close to yours with an unexpected softness. It's not a hasty or desperate kiss, but something slower, more measured. The brush of his lips against yours is so gentle that it surprises you, as if he's waiting for you to accept it, for you to be ready. And you are. Though your mind is still filled with doubts and fears, something inside you tells you that this is the moment you can allow yourself to be vulnerable, that you can receive something that won't hurt you.
The kiss deepens slowly, and in that instant, the world seems to fade away around you. All that remains is the warmth of his body, the firmness of his arms around you, and the gentle contact of his lips, like a silent promise that, even though the future is uncertain, for a moment, everything is alright.
When you finally pull away, no words are needed. Silco looks at you with an intensity you've never seen before, but in his eyes, there's something more, something you can't describe, something that makes you feel that, despite everything you've been through, you're not alone.
"I told you you were strong," he whispers, his voice deep and soft at the same time.
And for a moment, everything seems enough.
Mel Chronic Stress Disorder
The atmosphere is thick with tension, but it's a different kind of tension. It's a quiet calm, yet at the same time, it is filled with the constant threat of what could happen. Youâre there, in one of the rooms of the mansion, sitting on a chair by the window, gazing out at the illuminated city, but unable to really see anything. The world around you seems to blur, as if a layer of fog has settled over your senses, blurring every detail and leaving only the emptiness of your thoughts.
Mel, who has been watching your behavior for the past few minutes, approaches with a palpable gentleness in her movements. Her presence is firm, but not intrusive. From a distance, sheâs observed how the symptoms of your chronic stress have taken over you, how anxiety and mental exhaustion have combined to make you feel beyond your limits.
She crouches slightly to be at your level, her eyes fixed on yours, searching for your attention. âI notice youâre not yourself, and I know itâs because the weight of everything has piled up,â she says in a low voice, her tone soft yet firm. âBut I want you to listen. You have the right to rest. You donât have to carry the world, not all the time.â
Despite her words, you feel a pressure in your chest that wonât ease. Everything feels too big, too heavy. Chronic stress consumes you, leaving your thoughts tangled while your body responds with a deep exhaustion that doesnât seem to go away no matter what you do.
Mel, noticing the internal struggle that consumes you, steps closer and, without warning, places a firm hand on your shoulder. Itâs not a gesture of force, but of support. A sign that sheâs here, silently, but available to help you find the balance you need.
âYour body is telling you it needs to stop,â she continues, with a softness thatâs hard to deny. âThose moments of despair, of exhaustion... theyâre real. But you donât have to go through it alone, no matter how much you think you can.â
The contact of her hand on you, her quiet strength, begins to offer some relief. Even though the weight still lingers, something in you relaxes. Itâs as if her words offer you a rope to hold onto, something tangible in the fog that seems to surround your mind.
You lean forward, your fingers briefly touching your forehead as you try to calm the agitation still coursing through you. The stress, that constant pressure in your life, seems unwilling to let go of you, but at least in this moment, with Mel by your side, you can breathe a little more deeply.
âIâll be here,â Mel whispers, like an unbreakable promise. âIf you need to rest, Iâll help you find peace. You donât have to go on alone.â
For the first time in a long time, you allow yourself to think that, maybe, itâs possible to let go of some of that burden. Melâs voice, soft yet full of certainty, is a refuge in the midst of the chaos in your mind.
Mel doesnât expect you to feel guilty for your exhaustion. She doesnât demand that you change or âovercomeâ your chronic stress overnight. She only gives you space to feel what you need to feel and to acknowledge that, even though the road may be long, you donât have to walk it alone.
When your eyes lift and meet hers, thereâs something in your gaze that softens. The stress doesnât vanish immediately, but the simple fact that someone understands you, that someone is staying with you without judging, gives you something you didnât have before: the possibility of healing.
The silence between you both is comfortable. Itâs a silence of acceptance and understanding. And as Mel remains by your side, her presence becomes something that offers comfort, not an immediate solution, but a step toward the calm you so desperately need.
After a long silence, Mel slowly approaches you, and her eyes, filled with softness and understanding, capture you. She takes your hand, with a delicacy that makes you feel lighter, as if the weight of your mind could lessen just with that contact.
âYou know, right?â she whispers, her voice gentle but firm. âIâve seen you fight, and still, youâre here, being so incredible. And to me, thatâs what really matters. Not everything youâve been through, but who you are now.â
The sparkle in her eyes makes you blush slightly, and your heart beats a little faster.
âMel...â you whisper, barely able to find the words, feeling your nerves breaking. âI donât know what Iâd do without youâŠâ
She smiles, moving closer. âIâm here, for whatever you need, for anything, always.â
Without saying another word, Mel gently caresses your cheek, as if every movement is a silent promise. Then, you see her lean in toward you, her face so close to yours that you can feel the brush of her breath.
âYouâre my refuge, you know that, right?â Mel says, with sincerity that runs deep within you.
And without another word, her lips find yours, in a tender, almost urgent kiss, as if she wanted to convey everything she couldnât with words. When she pulls away, her eyes shine with an unmistakable softness.
âI love you, with all my being. And that wonât change.â
You shiver slightly at her words, but instead of insecurity, you find comfort. Her eyes transmit calm to you, and for the first time, you realize that sheâs willing to be the peace you so need.
Sevika Bipolar Disorder
The darkness surrounds you, but itâs not physical darkness; itâs something denser, creeping through every corner of your mind. Itâs one of those days. You donât know for sure, but you feel it deep in your gut: something has changed. Thereâs a void in your chest that you donât know how to fill, and a sensation in your stomach that twists you up. Youâve been through this before. The bipolar disorder drags you, takes you as its own without warning, pushing you from one extreme to the other in a matter of hours, minutes.
You wake up feeling the weight of sadness, a sadness that feels physical, sinking you into the mattress as if the sheets were lead. You donât want to move, think, or do anything. You just feel empty, as if all your strength has evaporated. The room seems smaller, the walls pressing in on you. Your legs donât respond when you try to get up. A knot forms in your throat, but the tears wonât come. Thereâs no energy for that, just the weight of despair.
You donât see her enter. Her presence is silent, but solid. Sevika knows something is wrong, she feels it even before you tell her. When you look at her, her expression doesnât change, but thereâs something in her eyes that makes you feel that the situation is serious. Thereâs no surprise, no fear, just a cold, calculating understanding. Sevika isnât one to lose her calm easily. And that makes you even more confused, making you feel like you donât belong in that moment, like youâre not the person she expects to see.
âWhatâs going on?â she asks, not softening anything. The question isnât condescending, nor filled with concern. Itâs direct, almost harsh, she doesnât beat around the bush. She knows that, when youâre like this, empty words donât help.
You struggle to form a response. You canât, really. Your thoughts are tangled in an incomprehensible chaos. But she doesnât expect you to explain anything. Sevika approaches, sits on the edge of the bed. Her gaze never leaves you, as if sheâs evaluating your soul, searching for a point of vulnerability, a sign of what to do next. She has the ability to see beyond your emotions, beyond the depression that consumes you and the anxiety that makes you tremble. She knows that right now thereâs nothing rational in your mind, but understanding is her only response. Patience mixes with a slight touch of toughness, as she always does with things she canât control.
âYouâre staying here. Youâre not going to do anything impulsive. Youâre not going to try to run out of here or make this worse,â she says with a calm coldness that leaves no room for objection. You know that, in this moment, sheâs the only voice of reason you can hear.
Youâre aware that Sevika is used to dealing with extreme situations, but this one is different. She watches you closely, but from a distance, as if sheâs weighing the damage, calculating what she can do to keep you safe. You donât see fear in her, but you see resolve. She doesnât switch into ârescuer mode,â she doesnât try to hug you or tell you that everything will be fine. What she says, she says with authority because she knows that if she gives in, chaos will take control, and everything sheâs worked to keep stable will fall apart.
In the internal struggle between your broken mind and the anger that begins to build up inside of you, Sevika is the rock that keeps you from diving into the void. But she also knows she canât ignore your emotions. Her expression hardens slightly when she realizes thereâs something more going on. âIâm telling you this because you know it, not because I need to explain it to you,â she whispers, making it clear that thereâs no room for games.
When you finally speak, itâs in whispers, as if your words have weight and could break you. âI donât know whatâs happening to me. Iâm... Iâm so tired of this constant back and forth. I canât handle it.â
Sevika doesnât change her posture. She doesnât tell you that sheâs going to âfixâ you, nor does she try to cure you. She knows that what you have doesnât have an easy fix, but she does have tools to deal with the situation. âYou donât need to fix anything right now. You need to rest. Let whatâs going to happen, happen, but donât make decisions youâll regret later. Do you understand me?â her voice is firm, but underneath thereâs something else, a touch of softness she rarely shows.
The air in the room is heavy, laden with the weight of your thoughts, like a fog that prevents you from seeing beyond. Sevika is there, watching you with the same intensity as always, but with an odd calm, a calm that scares you because it makes you feel like she sees it all: the chaos consuming you, the internal battle between despair and rage.
âI donât want this to control me. I donât want to be like this,â you murmur, the words coming out broken. You know youâre saying it more to yourself than to her, but still, the guilt pierces your chest like invisible needles. You feel like youâre not being who she expects.
Sevika stays silent for a moment, her gaze fixed on you. Thereâs something in her face, a line of tension in her jaw, as if sheâs weighing every word before speaking. Finally, she gets a little closer, breaking the distance between your bodies.
âItâs not about what you expect from yourself. Itâs about what you need right now. And what you need right now is rest, stop fighting against something you canât control.â
Your eyes search hers, those eyes that always seem to understand more than you can verbalize. And, somehow, you feel that thereâs no judgment in them, just a silent acceptance of what youâre going through. Itâs strange. In the middle of the storm in your mind, Sevika gives you the feeling of being the only anchor left in your world.
Suddenly, she stretches out a hand toward you, not rushing, not in a hurry, but with the firmness that characterizes her. You take it without thinking, as if itâs the only thing that can stop the flood of erratic thoughts flooding your mind. Her touch is warm, comforting. Thereâs a strength in that simple gesture, something that allows you to relax, even if just for a second.
âIâm going to take care of you, understand?â she whispers, her voice low, barely a breath. There are no empty promises in her words, just a statement of fact. But in her tone, you find a softness that she rarely shows. Itâs like, for a brief moment, her heart opens a little more, even if she doesnât fully recognize it.
The moment stretches on, and even though the storm in your mind hasnât ceased, thereâs something in you that feels a little lighter. Sevika doesnât have the solution to your pain, but her presence, her closeness, gives you a peace you never even imagined.
Without thinking, you move a little closer to her, seeking that warmth. Her fingers interlace with yours, and for the first time all day, you donât feel completely broken. Sevika has never promised you a happy ending, but in this moment, you donât need one. The simple fact of being here, of having her close, gives you a reason to keep going, even if just for a little while longer.
âI love you,â you say without thinking, and the words come out with a clarity that surprises you. Itâs not a grand declaration, itâs not a promise that everything will be okay, but itâs something real, something you never thought you could say to anyone before.
âI love you too, doll,â she responds with a half-smile, though her eyes seem softer than ever. And, for a second, the world seems to stop. The anxiety, the disorder in your head, dissipate, if only for a brief moment.
She leans in a little toward you, and in that instant, all that matters is the touch of her lips on your forehead, a simple gesture but filled with affection. The silence between you both is comfortable, no pressure, just the comfort of being together, knowing that, even if the world around you falls apart, Sevika will be the one to keep you steady.
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Hola. Long rambling feedback behind the cut as well as
When he meets you, he hasnât even thought of picking up a pencil in years. Ever since youâve been at the mansion though, Loganâs fingertips twitch with the urge to start sketching your features every time heâs with you. It gets hard to ignore after a few days.
I think this is so beautiful. Anyone who is a creative knows how difficult it can be to find a muse. So for this person to inspire a twitch in Logan after YEARS? That's just a very beautiful thing.
He waits until heâs known you a few weeks, thereâs no way in hell heâd ask if he could draw you. Heâd probably embarrass you by asking, and embarrass himself by admitting heâs into fucking art. Thatâs not him. Except, well, sometimes it is, when heâs inspired. And youâre nothing if not inspiring.Â
And this is for BOTH 1) thinking it's not ok to be into art??? OK BUT CAVEMEN CARVED INTO WALLS, SIR and 2) "you're nothing if not inspiring" *screamingggggggggggggggggggg*
The first few drawings are shit, he feels like theyâre almost an insult to you. Itâs not that heâs accidentally drawing you ugly, it just doesnât look like you. So he practises. Logan Howlett sits down at night to practise drawing.Â
I love that this fits with the Logan I know, the demand on self for perfectionism and the refusal to accept anything but. But it's especially important cuz he wants to do right by YOU/HER. *swoon*
And he totally knows that youâd never go for someone as rugged as him, thatâs for sure. You deserve much more. So much more.Â
Sigh. Oh Logan. Always thinking he's not worthy while he holds everyone he cares about up on pedestals. I both adore him and wanna shake him for these habits.
He doesnât know what youâre doing to him; youâve got him using social media.
He gets Rogue to show him Instagram for reference photos. HOW CUTE!
Logan hates how drawing makes him overthink, but he loves how it feels to create something other than violence with his hands for once â something that may even be the opposite.Â
This is soooooooooooooooo beautiful. It is just a loud beacon of what Logan's heart really is. It's also really precious that he finally produces a drawing of her that he's satisfied with which then produces ANGST in him. Cuz he can't leave it out cuz what if people see? But he doesn't want to hide it cuz what if it smudges? Watching him go back and forth about it and the STRESS shows how much it means to him not to mess it up but ALSO, I think, how much it means to him to be back drawing. As a creative who goes through the longest dry patches, when a period of productivity comes up? OH DO I WANT TO HANG ONTO IT. And probably try so hard that I make it slip through my fingers.
He finally lets himself think the thought thatâs politely been waiting to be allowed into his brain from the moment he decided he might take up drawing again. He could give it to you.Â
DO IT LOGANNNNNNNN!
Logan knows his drawing isnât objectively a masterpiece, but if heâs proud of it he has to acknowledge that that probably means itâs at least decent. And youâre definitely the type of person to appreciate something like this. Itâs weird admitting to himself that heâs even proud of what heâs drawn; heâs done so much in this world, who cares about a little drawing?Â
YOU care, sir! And people who love you will SEE that and care too!!! Don't we all wish he valued himself and his opinions more.
The only thing is that Logan isnât sure if heâs ready for anyone to see this side of him.
It's so precious to me, how relatable this is. Anyone who is a creative can relate, I'm sure. How nervous creatives are before they publish or they post or they even just share with someone they are close to. I wanna hug him.
He knows itâs stupid to hide but he just canât. He decides heâll leave the drawing in your room in an envelope, maybe a pink one to show you itâs not a creepy threat but meant as a sign of adoration, from someone who couldnât resist but try to recreate your beauty. He wonât write his name on it, he just wants you to have it. Sappy motherfucker.Â
Some day, someone needs to tell him he can give himself permission to BE sappy. Corny is part of life and it's a blessing.
Heâd doubt himself even more if he pussied out â a grown man who canât even slide an envelope under someoneâs door. So Logan mans up and, like an idiot, kisses the fucking drawing before he puts it into the envelope. He licks the edges of it to close it and writes your name in the most anonymous handwriting he can muster and adds a little heart. Itâs soo stupid.Â
It's annoying to read Logan's antiquated views on masculinity here. Completely understand that it fits with his character and how he has aged and evolved but omggggggggggg, it's just frustrating lol
Youâre a friend and nothing more, and thatâs fine. You probably donât like him like that and he can deal with that.
The way we can convince ourselves of the worst possible outcome, eh? *smh*
You have one of those clear phone cases, filled with a bunch of tiny pictures and stickers (and is that your credit card?). But wedged in front of all of those is Loganâs drawing. You turn around, giggling, âNo, I donât draw. And anyway, I wouldnât be drawing pictures of myself. I got it in an envelope under my door yesterday, photocopied it because I was scared it would bend in my phone case. I donât know who drew it.âÂ
SHE IMMEDIATELY TREATED IT AS SOMETHING PRECIOUS!!! SHE WANTED TO PROTECT IT JUST LIKE LOGAN WANTED TO PROTECT IT!!! BUT SHE LOVES IT TO THE POINT SHE MADE HERSELF A COPY TO CARRY IT AROUND WITH HER AT ALL TIMES!!!!!
âI donât know, just, so beautiful. Iâm not saying Iâm not pretty or anything, but this looks⊠I donât look like that. I wish I did. I canât believe someone actually sees me like that. Itâs stupid but IâŠ.â You trail off and, conveniently, the toast is done at the same time and you move on to that. But Logan wonât let you, âWhatâs stupid?â You turn towards him with a shy smile, âIâm embarrassed.â
To see the similarities in how they DON'T see themselves fully is kind of sweet and makes me root for them.
âI cried when I first saw it yesterday. Itâs one of the best gifts Iâve ever gotten. And itâs the nicest compliment Iâve ever received, for someone to perceive me in such an artistic way.â The problem is that it makes him want to draw more, his stupid heart melting at your reaction to something he madeâ no, created.Â
He thinks heâs sappy for drawing it but he doesnât think the same of you for enjoying the drawing.Â
This is HILARIOUS and KILLING ME because I also make rules for MYSELF that are different from the rules I have for EVERYONE ELSE lmao
Heâs usually more of a silent carer but maybe thatâs why he likes this. Heâs not making it a grand gesture, not making it a thing that heâs the one drawing for you. Itâs just for you to enjoy.Â
Logan being an Acts of Service person makes ALL the sense in the world to me.
But of course now that he knows it means something to you, he canât get anything right. He draws your hair too curly, then not curly enough. He draws your nose too big, then too small. Your eyes end up crooked. He canât erase too much because itâll look sloppy, so even the drawing he gets almost perfect, he ruins with a few final additions at the end.Â
The curse of the sequel! I think a lot of creatives can relate to this type of self induced pressure which means nothing you produce is good enough.
âGood?â you take the frame from his hands defensively, âItâs beautiful.â He chuckles, âSorry, I donât know much about this type of thing. It is beautiful though.â Heâs looking at you instead of his drawing.
She already has a frame for the new drawing cuz the frames came in packs of 2 and she will NOT STAND for someone not absolutely FAWNING over it and I love that from her. It's doing Logan's heart SO good to see how much she adores what he's created.
If thereâs someone whoâs worth it, itâs you. Seeing your pleased smile at something he made for you, he decides heâs never going to stop drawing you.
It was the stupidest joke of all that made you really laugh, some dumb comparison between Xavier and Caillou. You probably wouldnât even giggle at it anymore now, but in the moment it was so funny you almost spat out your drink from the deep belly laugh he drew from you, holding onto his bicep so you wouldnât fall over as tears formed in your eyes from how hard you were laughing. He wanted to engrave the image on his soul. At least he got your smile on paper.
Our man is S-M-I-T-T-E-N and I love that for him. Cuz look what it's brought back into his life?
âI didnât know you drawâ, you say without taking your eyes off it. âNo one else knows.â You pretend to zip your lips, smiling, âItâs our secret.â Logan can tell that you like that. He likes it too. It feels much better to share a secret with you than to be keeping one from you.
This is so intimate. And he's finally comfortable all the way with her. She knows it's him and he's fine with her knowing it's him.
You donât know how to put your feelings into words, so youâre kissing him instead. He pulls you down so that youâre not hovering over but sitting on his lap, and the mood immediately shifts to something different. Logan doesnât want to overwhelm you, but if youâre ready then heâll take anything he can get.
I appreciate that Logan is just the tiniest bit "selfish" here because this has been such an emotionally taxing ordeal for him. And she really really admires his talent and is THRILLED that it's him and that he sees her the way that he does.
From here the story slips into the Rated R portion of the story which is both hot and very sweet. The buildup means that I feel a genuine connection and intimacy between the 2 that feels "earned," if that's the right word. Cuz it doesn't feel forced or rushed or like we skipped a whole bunch of stuff to get here.
I also love that there's open dialogue. Often, the only talk between lovers is dirty - which I am a big fan of and absolutely fine with - but that here we have sweet confessions, constant check ins, and reassurances; these all fit with the journey we've been on with these two and I just really enjoy that aspect.
There's also good dirty talk, balanced give and take and praaaaaaaaaaaaise which I enjoy thoroughly. Logan also tends to take the possessive "my girl" over and over which just melts my butter!
@selfcarecap thank you so much for creating and sharing this! Thank you for following YOUR muse through to the end of this tale and then being brave enough to slip it under all our doors *bad dum tss* I really loved this look at Logan, his vulnerabilities, his abilities and desires beyond his powers / "job" and what allowing himself to create ultimately gifted him with. Well done smut that I also very much enjoyed too.
And thank you to K for putting it on my dash!
MUSE [L.H.]
Logan Howlett x reader
summary: Logan would never admit it to anyone, but over the course of his long life he has attempted to draw maybe once or twice. He hasnât done it in years, maybe even decades, but heâs struck by inspiration when he meets you. Of course, no one can know that Wolverine draws, so he does it in the dead of night, sliding anonymous envelopes with the finished drawings of you under your door. When he sees how much you love them, he wonders if you could also love the person behind them.Â
warnings: smut 18+ but with an actual plot for once (brief m masturbation, oral f and m rec, unprotected piv sex, kind of accidental (but consensual obv) facial; pet names: bub, baby, good girl, princess), soft!Logan but he wonât admit it, also soft!reader, fluff (although the summary makes it sounds a bit more dramatic than it is tbh), implication that reader has curly hair, implied mutant/X-men!reader, (obviously the pic doesnât represent the envelopes Logan uses lol heâs not doing all that)
word count: 7.3k
also i feel the need to say something about the fact that itâs Hugh Jackmanâs birthday today lol so uh thanks for being huge jacked man and for giving us our Logan yay <3 | gorgeous divider by @plutism
Itâs everything Logan is the opposite of â he would never tell a soul â but over the course of his long life, Logan has attempted to draw maybe once or twice. Itâs not really him, but he did have a phase or two.
When he meets you, he hasnât even thought of picking up a pencil in years. Ever since youâve been at the mansion though, Loganâs fingertips twitch with the urge to start sketching your features every time heâs with you. It gets hard to ignore after a few days.
He waits until heâs known you a few weeks, thereâs no way in hell heâd ask if he could draw you. Heâd probably embarrass you by asking, and embarrass himself by admitting heâs into fucking art. Thatâs not him.Â
Except, well, sometimes it is, when heâs inspired. And youâre nothing if not inspiring.Â
He gives in to the urge to get out pencil and paper again, waiting until everyone else has gone to sleep. The first few drawings are shit, he feels like theyâre almost an insult to you. Itâs not that heâs accidentally drawing you ugly, it just doesnât look like you. So he practises.Â
Logan Howlett sits down at night to practise drawing.Â
He picks out a few other things to draw then, to ease the pressure that comes with drawing the woman he⊠is friends with. Yeah, youâre a friend. And he totally knows that youâd never go for someone as rugged as him, thatâs for sure. You deserve much more. So much more.Â
But after a few nights he feels more confident in his drawing skills again, but still, as much as he can picture you in his mind â he can do that absolutely perfectly â heâs not too sure he could really draw you accurately.
So he gets Rogue to show him how goddamn fucking Instagram works so that he can look at some of your pictures and use them as a model.Â
He doesnât know what youâre doing to him; youâve got him using social media.
He canât believe it, but the first time he seriously attempts to draw you, itâs perfect. Itâs a small drawing, not even as big as his palm, capturing your gorgeous face. He thinks of adding another few lines to your eyebrows, or to your hair or another small one to the outline of your lips, but he doesnât want to mess with it.Â
Logan hates how drawing makes him overthink, but he loves how it feels to create something other than violence with his hands for once â something that may even be the opposite.Â
He hides the drawing in between the pages of a book, and hides the book under a pile of random clutter on his desk that not even he would normally spare a glance at. But when he lies down to go to sleep, he gets all the stuff out again and gets out the drawing. He wants to see it again. And he canât leave it there anyway, what if the pressure from all the items on top of it smudges it?Â
But he doesnât know what else to do with it. He canât really have a drawing of you sitting in his room. What if someone sees? Then what is he gonna do with it instead?Â
He finally lets himself think the thought thatâs politely been waiting to be allowed into his brain from the moment he decided he might take up drawing again.Â
He could give it to you.Â
Logan knows his drawing isnât objectively a masterpiece, but if heâs proud of it he has to acknowledge that that probably means itâs at least decent. And youâre definitely the type of person to appreciate something like this. Itâs weird admitting to himself that heâs even proud of what heâs drawn; heâs done so much in this world, who cares about a little drawing?Â
The only thing is that Logan isnât sure if heâs ready for anyone to see this side of him. To see the side that has him staying up until 3AM to finely trace the lines of someoneâs eyelashes and cheekbones and lips, the side that makes him feel calm inside.Â
He knows itâs stupid to hide but he just canât. He decides heâll leave the drawing in your room in an envelope, maybe a pink one to show you itâs not a creepy threat but meant as a sign of adoration, from someone who couldnât resist but try to recreate your beauty. He wonât write his name on it, he just wants you to have it.Â
Sappy motherfucker.Â
He puts the small drawing back into the book and carefully pushes it between his mattress and the bedframe to protect it during the night. God, who even is he â protecting a tiny piece of paper? He groans at himself as he turns around to go to sleep.Â
He dreams of making a thousand drawings of you, with you as his live model. His muse.Â
Youâre his girlfriend in his dream, he thinks.Â
Heâs sitting in a chair in your room, drawing you as you tell him about your day. Youâre lying on your bed on your tummy, elbows propped up to support your head. Youâre gently kicking your feet in the air behind you, wearing nothing but a t-shirt of Loganâs, some silly graphic socks, panties with little cherries on them, and a bright, bashful smile as Logan attempts to capture your glowing features in a sketch block heâs dedicated to drawings of you.Â
He wakes up with morning wood.Â
Logan is no stranger to jerking off with you on his mind, so he spits in his hand and slips it beneath his boxers, stroking himself as he thinks of you. He imagines you on top of him as he jerks his cock, imagines you under him, or with your legs around his head, or you between his knees on the floor. He cums quickly and hard, leaving his boxers wet and sticky.
He goes for a run after heâs dealt with it and picks up an envelope on his way. Heâs doubting himself but he knows he has to just do it. Heâd doubt himself even more if he pussied out â a grown man who canât even slide an envelope under someoneâs door.Â
So Logan mans up and, like an idiot, kisses the fucking drawing before he puts it into the envelope. He licks the edges of it to close it and writes your name in the most anonymous handwriting he can muster and adds a little heart.Â
Itâs soo stupid.Â
He makes sure no one is anywhere near your bedroom, walks up to your door, and slides the envelope underneath. Except he didnât check if you were in your room. As soon as the envelope disappears beneath your door, he hears a short creak from your bed and your soft footsteps.Â
He hears the small and adorable noise of curiosity you let out â a confused hm? â and then he quickly and quietly makes his way down the hallway. He hears your voice about ten seconds later, an intrigued hello? as you open the door, but you donât investigate further, closing the door behind you.Â
Loganâs heart is beating so fast. Heâs never doing this shit again.Â
Heâs antsy all day, waiting for some type of reaction from you. Except you donât know that the drawing is from him so heâs probably not even getting one, and he canât conspicuously come to your room the same day you receive an anonymous drawing of yourself.Â
Itâs also when the insecurity settles in. Maybe he should have added a few more lines or started the entire drawing anew. Who does he think he is pretending to be an artist?Â
He shakes those thoughts off as he starts training with the punching bag in the gym. Itâs not something that he necessarily needs to train, but it gets rid of some of that pointless energy. This isnât him, worried about some lines he drew on a piece of paper â a scrap of a paper, really. Who cares about something like that? Certainly not him.Â
He sleeps dreamlessly and wakes up the next day disappointed that he didnât get to dream about being your boyfriend again. God, what are you doing to him? Making him think about being boyfriend and girlfriend. Heâs pathetic. Youâre a friend and nothing more, and thatâs fine. You probably donât like him like that and he can deal with that.
-
Heâs not even thinking of the drawing anymore, truly, when he walks into the kitchen the next morning. It only comes to mind when he sees you, alone in the kitchen, leaning over the counter to scroll on your phone, your weird green coffee (âitâs Matcha, Loganâ) next to you as you stir it mindlessly with a metal straw.Â
âHi,â you look up with one of those sweet smiles of yours, but redirect your attention to your phone.Â
At least you donât immediately say something like hey, you know that drawing you slid under my door? It was so ugly I threw it away. Since when do you even draw?Â
Not that he was worried you would or anything. He hasnât been thinking about it. Obviously. Why would he? And he knows you would never expect that itâs him; thatâs the only reason he did it. He never would have given you the drawing if he thought you could have even the slightest inkling that Logan would be someone who draws. But he still wants to know what you think of it.Â
âYou want some toast too?â You ask, putting your phone down and turning to get some bread. He sits down at the other side of the kitchen counter and as his eyes flicker to your green drink (he still doesnât get it), he sees it.Â
âIs thatââ my drawing, he almost said, âWhat is that?â He pretends to be confused, drawing his eyebrows together, trying his best to look inquisitive, âNo toast by the way, thanks.âÂ
You have one of those clear phone cases, filled with a bunch of tiny pictures and stickers (and is that your credit card?). But wedged in front of all of those is Loganâs drawing.Â
âDid you draw it?â He asks.Â
You turn around, giggling, âNo, I donât draw. And anyway, I wouldnât be drawing pictures of myself. I got it in an envelope under my door yesterday, photocopied it because I was scared it would bend in my phone case. I donât know who drew it.âÂ
âSecret admirer?âÂ
Smiling, you say, âI donât know. I wonât get my hopes up. But the person must definitely be fond of me to draw me like that.âÂ
âLike what?â He asks, unsure if heâs about to be offended.Â
âI donât know, just, so beautiful. Iâm not saying Iâm not pretty or anything, but this looks⊠I donât look like that. I wish I did. I canât believe someone actually sees me like that. Itâs stupid but IâŠ.â You trail off and, conveniently, the toast is done at the same time and you move on to that.Â
But Logan wonât let you, âWhatâs stupid?âÂ
You turn towards him with a shy smile, âIâm embarrassed.â
Logan stays silent. He canât seem too pushy and draw attention to himself, but his silence makes you confess.
âI cried when I first saw it yesterday. Itâs one of the best gifts Iâve ever gotten. And itâs the nicest compliment Iâve ever received, for someone to perceive me in such an artistic way.âÂ
Logan makes a noise of satisfaction and smiles, asking you to pass your phone so he can look at it more â pretending itâs his first time seeing it. If you think that way about it, maybe the three more lines he was going to add arenât that important after all.Â
The problem is that it makes him want to draw more, his stupid heart melting at your reaction to something he madeâ no, created.Â
-
After a week, he figures he has to give in. Drawing another picture of you is on his mind twenty-four seven.Â
It doesnât help that he still catches you staring at the copy of it in your phone case lovingly more than once a day and youâve put the original drawing in a special little frame on your nightstand. He thinks heâs sappy for drawing it but he doesnât think the same of you for enjoying the drawing.Â
This is for you. Itâs not about him. Heâs not an artist or anything like that, heâs just doing something kind for someone he cares about (which is honestly sappy enough but he tries to ignore that). Heâs usually more of a silent carer but maybe thatâs why he likes this. Heâs not making it a grand gesture, not making it a thing that heâs the one drawing for you. Itâs just for you to enjoy.Â
Heâll just make this second drawing and silently put it in your room, and heâs the last person youâll suspect.Â
But of course now that he knows it means something to you, he canât get anything right. He draws your hair too curly, then not curly enough. He draws your nose too big, then too small. Your eyes end up crooked. He canât erase too much because itâll look sloppy, so even the drawing he gets almost perfect, he ruins with a few final additions at the end.Â
It takes him an entire month for the next drawing, and it feels more like him that itâs been making him so angry that he couldnât get it right at first. Maybe he had the wrong picture of artists. Theyâre always talking about pain, arenât they, and thatâs what he experiences too (over a drawing. Who is he?).Â
He takes another few days to keep track of your routine, to monitor when youâll be in your room. He canât have it be as close as last time.Â
He ends up doing it in the evening. Thereâs a time after dinner when most of the team stays together to watch tv, just talk, or play some games. Itâs normal for some of you to wander off, come back or stick around a bit longer. It wonât be suspicious if he leaves for a few minutes and comes back.
Logan wants nothing more than to follow you when you say that youâre going to your room for the night; he wants to see your reaction. But he canât. All he can do is go up to his own bedroom fifteen minutes later, lingering in the hallway longer than he needs to.
Just as heâs about to give up and go to sleep, you walk down the hallway, coming back from the bathroom.
âLogan!â you call all excitedly when you see him, and his heart skips a beat. Do you know the drawing is from him?Â
âLook,â you take his arm and pull him to your room, âI got another drawing!â
He breathes out in relief; you donât know itâs from him. He smiles when you hold up the drawing, already framed.
âWere you expecting to get another drawing?â he teases.
âNoo, but the frames came in a pack of two. Isnât it gorgeous?â
Logan looks at how your eyes sparkle, how proudly youâre showing him this drawing. All the work he put into it was definitely worth it. Itâs another picture of your face, this time from a new angle, and with your hair styled differently, curls coiled another way from last time.
Logan clears his throat, remembering to keep up his act. âIt looks good.â
âGood?â you take the frame from his hands defensively, âItâs beautiful.â
He chuckles, âSorry, I donât know much about this type of thing. It is beautiful though.â Heâs looking at you instead of his drawing.
âIt is. And you donât have to know much about art or drawing to see how pretty this is. I still canât believe someone would take the time to make these for me.â
Logan remains silent instead of saying what he wants to tell you. Of course he would take that time for you â and you donât even know how much time it really took him. If thereâs someone whoâs worth it, itâs you.
Seeing your pleased smile at something he made for you, he decides heâs never going to stop drawing you.
-
Heâs on a roll for some time. Heâs better at drawing again now that heâs getting in practice, and he makes five drawings of you within the next weeks. Logan watches the collection of them on your nightstand grow fuller, along with your smile that somehow gets bigger every time you tell him about a new drawing.
Itâs a wonder you havenât caught on yet, but you donât seem particularly interested in snooping around to find out who it is. You respect the personâs privacy, but youâve confessed to him that youâd still love to know.Â
âI wonât try to find out who it is. I wonât push it if they donât want me to know⊠but, I mean, anyone would want to know, wouldnât they?â
Youâve adopted the nickname of âsecret admirerâ for this mysterious âtheyâ, after Logan used the term about ten times. You were reluctant at first, because the person isnât calling themself a secret admirer â youâd just be putting words in their mouth. But after seeing how much more beautiful the drawings get each time, youâve accepted and admitted that, okay, yes, the person must be an admirer.
Your secret admirer Logan is particularly proud of his latest drawing, excited to bring it up to your room tonight.Â
But this time heâs sloppy. Heâs stayed for a few post-dinner card games with the team, and itâs risky, because youâve been saying that itâs your last game for the last two rounds. But he also knows that you always say that, and never mean it.
Logan gets up to leave, and he hears Scott convincing you to play just one more round.
Itâs stupid, really, risking it like that. Even if heâs gone from your room in time before you come upstairs, you could easily guess that itâs Logan. Heâs the first one leaving the round tonight, so your first assumption could be that it was him.
Maybe subconsciously he wants to get caught. Heâs seen how you light up at every drawing, and no matter how much you respect your admirerâs anonymity, of course you want to know whoâs dedicating so much time and work to drawings of you. Of course itâs crossed your mind that the person isnât just doing this because theyâre a good friend. Theyâre drawing your face because they think itâs beyond beautiful.
Logan doesnât really know why he hasnât told you yet that he likes you. Heâs good at flirting, and heâs attractive â heâs not blind. But with you itâs different, thereâs a bigger risk, for the both of you. The older he gets, the harder it is to open up to yet another person. Youâre friends, and you talk about personal things, but confessing that heâs in love with you is different.
Not to mention this stupid recurring dream he keeps having, in which you find out itâs Logan whoâs been drawing you, and suddenly your opinion of the drawings changes. You donât like him back like that, and suddenly the drawings feel creepy if you think about him staying up late drawing your face.
He rolls his eyes at himself and gets the thought out of his head, taking the small envelope out of the back pocket of his jeans, smoothing his hand over it. He looks around, making sure no one sees him.
Logan bends down to slide the envelope under your door as usual, but one of the corners of the paper catches against the wall, and he quickly opens it to check the drawing isnât damaged. His heart is beating so fast, he feels stupid.Â
He can hear footsteps, still far away, but he can hear them. Logan messily licks the edges of the envelope to close it back up, but itâs not sticking. He canât decide between shoving it under the door like this or leaving now and bringing it back the next day. He can feel his heart hammering against his ribcage now.
Then he hears it. He miscalculated how far the footsteps were.
âLogan?â
He turns around slowly, and it feels like the world has frozen.
You come closer, looking at him and then at the letter that he mustâve dropped. It hasnât made it under your door yet.
He says something before you can, âIâm delivering for someone else.â
âWho?â you ask, bending down to pick up the envelope. If he wasnât petrified, heâd enjoy the view of you bent over in front of him.
He breathes. He canât have anyone taking credit for his work, for his art (you called it that recently, he would never). But his heart is beating so fast he doesnât know what the fuck to do or say.Â
This is exactly why he never wanted to do any of this. Heâs making a fool out of himself and that doesnât usually happen, especially not over a piece of paper. Logan is confident, cocky even, he can admit that, and has no idea how to deal with things like being nervous; he never has to. This really isnât him.
You donât wait for an answer and look at the envelope. You open it so carefully, gently taking the drawing out with your fingertips. Youâre treating it with so much care he immediately feels better. Again, this isnât for him, itâs for you. (Well, itâs for him too but itâll take him a while to admit that).Â
Heâs drawn your smile this time. You were happy in most of the drawings before, but he focussed more on the eyes, and your lips only ever tugged up in a slight smile.Â
This one is a full-toothed grin, mid-laugh.Â
You two were drinking last weekend. He barely felt it but your tipsy, giggly mood was contagious. He couldnât imagine himself feeling any other way but blissful when youâre happy around him.Â
It started when Logan made a casual comment about something silly Scott was wearing that night, and he had you giggling. He wanted to immediately hear that angelic sound again, of course, and so he gave you every joke about your shared friends he could think of â all light-hearted, but he was still glad you two were alone.Â
It was the stupidest joke of all that made you really laugh, some dumb comparison between Xavier and Caillou. You probably wouldnât even giggle at it anymore now, but in the moment it was so funny you almost spat out your drink from the deep belly laugh he drew from you, holding onto his bicep so you wouldnât fall over as tears formed in your eyes from how hard you were laughing. He wanted to engrave the image on his soul. At least he got your smile on paper.
You look up at him now, eyes filled with tears.Â
âYou drew this?â you ask.
He nods softly. He canât say it but he hopes the drawings convey how in love with you he is.Â
Suddenly, Logan feels like his heart has stopped beating.
Youâre kissing him.Â
Youâve leaped up, wrapped your arms around the back of his neck, and now your lips are on his.Â
He feels your mouth falter, probably because heâs being a fucking idiot and not kissing you back. Logan places his hands on your waist to pull you further towards him. Then his brain finally catches up and he can do what heâs wanted to for so long.Â
He takes your chin with two fingers and angles you so you can kiss him easier. He closes his eyes and revels in the feeling of your soft, warm lips against him. Youâre soft and warm all over. Your top has slipped up over his fingertips at your sides, and he slides his hands further around your back to support you against him even better.Â
Loganâs tongue pushes at your lower lip, and you let out the sexiest, tiny moan of surprise as you part your lips for him, granting him access.Â
His tongue touches the tip of yours and from then on your cravings intensify. You feel your way over his muscular shoulders, his big biceps and over the hard planes of his chest. When youâve had a good feel there, your hands grip his shirt in desperation and Logan gets even hungrier for you. He gently bites at your lower lip, but then you shriek into his mouth and squirm out of his grasp. He opens his eyes wide.Â
You grip Loganâs forearm for support when you bend down in a panic, picking up the drawing you just dropped. You let out a big breath of relief when you see it hasnât been damaged.Â
âYou made me drop it!â You slap a hand to his chest; it doesnât actually hurt and itâs not meant to, but it leaves a pleasant tingle behind instead.Â
âI didnât do anythingâ, Logan laughs, and you shake your head at him with a smile.
You take him into your room where you make him sit on the bed while you stare at the new drawing in awe. âI didnât know you drawâ, you say without taking your eyes off it.
âNo one else knows.â
You pretend to zip your lips, smiling, âItâs our secret.â Logan can tell that you like that. He likes it too. It feels much better to share a secret with you than to be keeping one from you.
âIâll only draw for you anyway, so thereâs no point in telling anyone else.â
âYouâre really good. I love the drawings.â
Logan gives a satisfied hum at your words, âYou inspired me. Canât have you walking around all pretty and not expect me to try and recreate it.â
You straddle Logan and hover over his lap to hug him, âTheyâre the best thing anyone's ever given to me. Do I really look like that?â You say the last question more quietly, and Logan wraps his arms around your sides, careful not to bump your hand thatâs still holding the drawing.
âYouâre more gorgeous than anything I could ever capture, but I think it comes close. I didnât change anything about you to make you more beautiful. I couldnât if I tried. I just tried to draw you as accurately as possible, thatâs why itâs so beautiful.â
âI really love it,â you say again, happily staring at the details of the drawing. Hearing you say the word love so much tempts Logan, but he doesnât want to move too fast. He doesnât want to overwhelm you. He does, however, want to kiss you again.
Logan carefully takes the framed drawing and puts it on your nightstand. You push your mouth against his before he can initiate the kiss, and he grins against your lips.
You donât know how to put your feelings into words, so youâre kissing him instead. He pulls you down so that youâre not hovering over but sitting on his lap, and the mood immediately shifts to something different. Logan doesnât want to overwhelm you, but if youâre ready then heâll take anything he can get.
Your chest is pressed against Loganâs, and you can feel the rise and fall of his chest when he breathes. You may or may not be pressing your boobs against his body on purpose.
âGod, baby, Iâve waited so long for this,â he says, already breathless, as his hands trail down your back, leaving goosebumps behind.
âYouâve waited long?â you raise your eyebrows, grinning, âIâve wanted to fuck you since the day I met you.â
You see the look in Loganâs eyes changing as he bites his lip, âWho says I didnât want the same?â
You giggle, âWhy did it take us so long?â
Logan chuckles, readjusting you so that youâre even closer to him, âI was too busy to actually talk to you, just been starinâ at you so I could draw you.â His cheeks have the faintest red tint, and you kiss them, hugging him.
You whisper into his ear, âThen it was worth the wait. And anyway, itâs not talking that Iâm interested in right now.â
He pulls you back to look into your eyes, then at your lips. âWhere do you want me?â he asks. You giggle slightly helplessly; you werenât entirely prepared to have a man like Logan at your mercy like this tonight.
âYou can do whatever you want,â you say softly, kissing him.
Loganâs lips are hungry against yours, strings of spit falling between you two, but he pauses the kiss to lie you on your back. âWanna eat you out,â he husks, âBeen dying to know what you taste like forever, bub. Can I?â He reaches for the hem of your top, and you nod so that he can pull it off you, admiring whatâs underneath.Â
âSometimes I make myself cum imagining that Iâm going down on you,â you confess somewhat shyly, but you figure heâs been so vulnerable for you that you can share a secret too.
Logan smirks, and pulls off his shirt, âMaybe we can make your dream come true then.â
You move to sit up, but he insists on eating you out first. You both take off all your clothes, staring at each other with huge smiles on your faces for a few moments. Youâve never seen Logan this happy.
âLook at you, baby. So pretty,â he leans down to kiss your lips, then down your neck, all the way to your legs. He spreads them, lying down between them as he all but drools at the sight of your wet pussy.
You get nervous all of a sudden. âItâs been a while,â you tell him. He looks up, taking your hand, enveloping it completely in his much bigger one.
âYou sure about this? We can wait,â he gently kisses your knuckles, and a warmth spreads in your chest, slowing your heartbeat down a little.
âIâm sure,â you nod, and Logan comes up again to kiss you. The head of his hard cock catches against the space above your clit, and you both look down between your bodies. When Logan looks back up at you, his eyes are desperately begging you. You place your hand on his head, threading your fingers through his hair as he moves down your body.
âSuch a pretty fucking pussy,â he mumbles into your thigh, kissing you there. You giggle, getting comfortable, your hand never leaving his hair.
Logan starts eating you out, his tongue gentle but determined against your clit.
âTaste so good, baby. Even better than I imagined.â You hum at Loganâs words, already feeling yourself come undone with his mouth on your wet pussy.
You sink further into the mattress when he starts sucking on your clit, licking into your pussy like a man starved every few moments, and your thighs squeeze around Loganâs head, and itâs even better than in his fantasies.
âFeels really good,â you tell him, pulling on his hair to stop yourself from moving too much, and Logan moans against your skin. Hearing your words motivates him even more, and he pushes two fingers into your wet pussy. He curls his fingers, rubbing up against that spot that makes you see stars.
Your back arches as you cum, Loganâs lips wrapped around your clit as your legs push harder against his head, and all he does is moan, revelling in the feeling.
Logan doesnât stop licking your pussy until youâre tugging his head away by his hair, and he comes up for air with a grin on his face. You smile back, pulling him up to kiss him. You give yourself only a few seconds of recovery time before you make him sit down. You know youâd never have enough strength to actually make him get into a different position, but he lets you.
You push him onto his back, getting between his legs. Youâre blinking up at him all prettily when you ask, âCan I suck your dick? Please?â
Logan huffs to himself because he canât believe how hot you are, canât believe that this is really finally happening. He tells you yes â he has no more words to describe how badly he wants this â and he watches you wrap your pretty lips around his cock.
Itâs hard to grasp that itâs really you doing this right now â the woman heâs been into for so long. His cock is in your mouth and you look so gorgeous with spit running down from your lips, and all he can think of is all the dirty drawings he can now make of you, if youâll let him.
He closes his eyes when you take him deeper, enveloping him with your warm, wet mouth. âGood girl,â he whispers absent-mindedly, too gone to say much more.
Youâre not using your hands as you suck his cock, your spit trailing down on him, and youâre so eager. But itâs also late, and he sees you getting tired, eyes blinking slower as you pause to catch your breath every few moments. He also sees the determination in your eyes, and the absolute want, but he doesnât want you to exhaust yourself.Â
You look so sexy all fucked out, strings of spit connecting your mouth to his cock as you pull away another time, giggling up at him shyly when you realise that heâs noticing you getting tired.
âJust need a second,â you wipe your mouth, out of breath, and itâs not that youâre not incredibly hot like this, but he still wants to fuck you tonight and heâs not sure that will happen if you keep going.
âCâmere, baby,â he says, reaching out his hand.
âHuh?â you ask, taking his hand nevertheless.
âGet back here, baby. Iâm gonna fuck you now, alright? Donât want you tiring yourself out.â
You let him lift you and put you on your back, but you pout, âWanna taste you.â
Logan grins, âIâll cum in your mouth, princess. Promise.â
You smile at his answer, satisfied, so you lie back down, pulling your legs up to your chest. His cock looks huge as he jerks himself off between your legs, rubbing the tip against your clit, making you squirm.
âDonât know if I can take you,â you bite your lip. Youâre not entirely sure if you mean it or not. You definitely want to try.
âWeâll make it fit, baby, weâll make it fit,â Logan assures you, leaning down to press a kiss to your mouth, a mix of your wetness and his precum between your mouths. You feel his cock at your pussy, âYou ready?â
âIâm ready,â you nod desperately, letting him push his cock into your pussy. He pauses after a few inches, but you wrap your legs around his waist more tightly, and he goes deeper.
âYâokay, baby? You can take it, right?â
You nod, unable to form words with your pussy stretched like this, a combination of pleasure and pain between your legs â but itâs infinitely more pleasure.
âThatâs right. Youâre my good girl, hm?â He kisses along your neck as he bottoms out, and you both moan when heâs got his cock fully stuffed inside you for the first time. He pulls out slightly when you whine at the stretch, but you scratch down his back to get his attention.
âI can take it,â you tell him, and you watch the look in his eyes darken.
He begins to fuck you, the pain subsiding more with every thrust into your wet pussy. You can barely take him, but it feels good. With your slight tiredness, you feel like youâre floating on cloud nine.Â
You canât believe that Logan â your super hot friend Logan who youâve been fantasising about for so long â is fucking you. He not only feels the same way about you, but heâs been your secret admirer this entire time, taking hours and hours out of his day to make you smile. Youâre the only one he wants.
And now heâs fucking you, fucking you well, and you feel so warm inside, not just from the sex but you feel warm in your heart, because of Loganâs care.
âYou okay?â he asks, stroking a hand down your face when he notices youâre not entirely present. You nod happily, smiling up at him, and you canât talk because you feel so good.
âGood, thatâs good, bub, but let me know if it gets too much,â he says as he starts rubbing your clit, watches you nod while heâs fucking you so well, and heâs so big and so deep inside of you, âSqueezing me so tight, baby, feel so fucking good.â
You cum suddenly, letting the warm pleasure flow through your body as Logan keeps fucking you through it, rubbing your clit in just the right rhythm.
âThatâs my girl, taking it so well,â he moans, breaths stuttering. You slump against the pillow after a few moments, with a soft smile on your face, and Logan pulls out.
âGonna make me cum, baby,â he jerks his cock, and you sit up on your elbows immediately, looking him in the eyes with a smile as you stick out your tongue for him. He promised.
Logan moans when he cums, painting your face in his release, jerking himself off. He holds your head in place with his other hand, aiming for your mouth but youâre making no effort to catch his cum there.
âSuch a pretty fucking face, princess, âm cumming all over it,â he rasps, shooting more ropes of his cum all over your cheeks, jacking off onto your face.
You open your eyes when heâs done and breathing heavily, and you smile up at him. You open your mouth, taking the head of his cock between your lips to suck off the last drops of cum.
âLook at you, baby. Look so fucking pretty with my cum all over your gorgeous face.â
You hum, pulling your mouth off him and licking your lips, tasting his salty release. You brush a finger over your cheek, sucking it into your mouth to taste him more. Logan kisses you then, the flavour of himself mixing between your mouths.
He cleans you up gently, carefully wiping your face with a baby wipe and kissing every inch of your cheeks afterwards. You take his face to kiss him properly, and if you didnât seem so tired Logan would be ready for round two immediately.
âNext time you could try to actually cum in my mouth,â you tease, making Logan grin.
âSorry, baby. Got too excited. Couldnât focus on asking you again if it was okay.â He presses an open-mouthed kiss to your lips.
âItâs okay,â you tell him, âI liked it.â
Logan grins, âOh I could tell you liked it, baby.â You lightly slap his chest as you giggle, pulling him in for another kiss.
You cuddle for a while, not saying much because you donât have to. Youâve both waited for this for so long that youâre just enjoying the moment, enjoying that it finally happened.
You slip out of his arms to sit on top of him. Youâre in nothing but panties, the blanket bunching around your hips. You lean your hands against his chest as you tell him more about how much the drawings delighted you. And Logan cares, of course he cares to hear that, but heâs also just a man seeing the woman heâs into naked for the first time still.Â
You become quiet when you realise that heâs not listening, and you giggle, âDistracted?â
Logan grins, âJust a little fucking bit, baby.â His eyes donât leave your body, and you laugh as you bend down to kiss him. He grabs your ass, kneading the flesh. When you slightly sit up again, your tits are near his face, and he canât help himself. He cups your breasts, playing with your nipples, making you hum.
âI should draw these,â he looks up at you, âShould draw every perfect fucking inch of you.â
âYou wanna?â You adjust how youâre seated in his lap, and you feel that heâs already half hard under you again.
âMaybe after Iâve fucked you again.â
You smile, feeling yourself growing wetter on top of him.
âTomorrow,â he continues, and your smile drops.
âBut youâve got to get more familiar with the inspiration, right? If youâre going to draw me.â
âThatâs true, baby. But I think youâre too tired.â
You smile bashfully, ignoring how your eyelids were drooping shut just a few seconds ago, âOkay, but then Iâll have more energy for tomorrow.â
âThatâs my girl,â he smiles, pulling you off him to cuddle you again. He tucks you in and kisses your head.Â
You turn to your side, taking one of the framed drawings and looking at it for a while.Â
Logan watches you looking at it, and the sparkle in your eyes never fails to make him feel all warm inside. âNow that you actually know about it, I donât have to draw you from memory anymore. I can study my muse in peace.â
âAww, Iâm your muse?â you beam.
âOf course you are, princess. Youâre the only reason Iâm drawing again.â
âI love your drawings so much.â
Logan clears his throat, and looks at you. âWell, I love you. So, I think that went into them.â
You look at him, pouting and then kissing him. âI love you too,â you say into his mouth. He grins against your lips, pulling you closer to kiss you some more. He can barely grasp that you just said that, but heâll have enough time soon to comprehend how lucky he is.Â
For now, he takes your hand, and asks, âThe question might be redundant now, but do you wanna be mine? Be my girlfriend?â
âIâm already yours.â
Logan grins, takes you in his arms, and youâre still cuddling when youâre both drifting off to a peaceful sleep.
P.S. reblog with a comment and let me know your favourite moment/what you liked to get a drawing from Logan under your door tonight and a facial <33
gorgeous divider by @pommecita
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Innocent
short drabble
featuring. ambessa x princess!reader
requested by anon
a/n. a short drabble in honor of the new league cinematic video. (not proofread)
Whispers followed you wherever you went, delicate and sweet like the trailing ribbons of your pastel gown. A princess from a distant land, they called you, with eyes like morning dew and a smile so radiant it could disarm even the most hardened souls. You walked beside Ambessa Medarda as you entered Piltoverâs council chamber, her imposing presence drawing wary glances and tightened jaws. But you, oh, you were such the opposite compared to her with your delicate hands grazing the edge of the table as you curtsied. The softness of your voice weaving through the room like silk.
They couldnât understand it. What was someone like you, someone that was the vision of elegance, doing at the side of a woman like Ambessa? A warlord who ruthless and cunning, with a reputation for crushing anything that stood in her way. You looked out of place at her side, like a butterfly perched on the shoulder of a lion. But appearances, as Ambessa had taught you, were the first weapon in your arsenal.
âYour Highness,â one of the councilmen greeted, his tone dripping with condescension as he rose from his chair. âIt is truly an honor to have such a distinguished guest among us.â His gaze lingered a moment too long on your soft hair and the glimmering jewels that adorned your wrists. You smiled, tilting your head ever so slightly.
âThank you, my lord,â you said, your voice so sweet it bordered on saccharine. âI must confess, I find Piltover to be⊠overwhelming. Such brilliance and innovation, but so complex. I hardly know where to begin.â You laughed softly, the sound drawing smiles from more than one member of the room. Ambessa remained silent beside you, her sharp gaze watching, as you worked your magic on the men.
âYou need not worry, Princess,â another councilman intersected, his voice laced with eagerness and a touch of pride. âWe are more than happy to guide you through anything you wish to understand. Perhaps⊠I could offer you a private tour of the academy?â His tone was almost gallant, but the hunger in his eyes was unmistakable.
Your cheeks flushed, as you clasped your hands together. âThat is so kind of you, my lord,â you said, casting your gaze downward shyly before glancing back up through your lashes. âI wouldnât want to impose, but Iâve always been so fascinated by Piltoverâs Hextech. Perhaps I could ask you a few questions later? I wouldnât want to take up too much of your time.â
Ambessa fought the smirk tugging at her lips, her arms crossed as she leaned back against the far wall. You were perfect. Every tilt of your head, every soft-spoken word was calculated to pull strings you werenât even sure the men knew they had.
The council meeting proceeded, but you hardly paid attention to the broader discussions. Instead, you focused on planting seeds into the minds of the men. Compliments so subtle they felt like afterthoughts, questions that seemed harmless but dug at the roots of Piltoverâs inner circle. By the time the meeting was over, you had gathered more than enough information to satisfy Ambessaâs expectations.
As the members filtered out, one lingered, his gaze fixed on you. âPrincess,â he began, a nervous chuckle escaping him. âI couldnât help but notice your⊠curiosity earlier. If you truly wish to learn more about Hextech, I could arrange a demonstration for you. Something private, of course, so you could see its full potential.â
Your lips curved into a soft smile, even as the words you spoke were sharp enough to cut. âYou are too kind, my lord,â you murmured, stepping closer until you were just within his space. âI would love that. Perhaps tomorrow evening?â
The man nodded eagerly, his face alight with excitement as he stumbled over his words. Ambessa cleared her throat, her presence suddenly oppressive as she stepped forward. âHer Highness will have a full schedule,â she said, her voice like the edge of a blade. âBut Iâm sure sheâll find time for your⊠demonstration.â
As the man hurried off, you turned to Ambessa, your expression dropping the moment he was out of sight. âAmateur,â you muttered under your breath, your sweet demeanor melting into something sharper. Ambessa chuckled, resting a hand on your shoulder.
âYouâve done well,â she said, her voice low and approving. âTheyâre all wrapped around your little finger.â
You looked up at her, a small smirk playing on your lips. âOf course they are,â you replied, your tone light but edged with pride.
Later, as you sat on the edge of the bed in Ambessaâs quarters, she watched you from her seat by the fire. You were still the picture of sweetness in your pink nightgown, your hair falling in over your shoulders, but she knew better. Beneath that façade was a mind as sharp as any blade she wielded.
âYou were perfect today,â she said finally, her voice breaking the silence. You turned to her, your smile genuine this time as you padded over to her chair.
âOnly because you taught me,â you said softly, kneeling at her feet. Ambessa reached out, her rough hand brushing against your cheek, her touch surprisingly tender.
âCouldnât be prouder,â she murmured, her voice softer than youâd ever heard it. You leaned into her touch, your eyes closing as a contented smile spread across your lips.
Innocence was your mask, manipulation your weapon, and loyalty to Ambessa the thread that bound it all together. You were exactly what she had shaped you to be. It was easy to manipulate others when they werenât expecting it from a person with such a sweet demeanor. Clearly you proved them wrong, well eventually.
taglist. @blckbny @ch-bl0gsss @b-lossm @fortluocha @ekkosh @limereance @wolfessa @themostlesbianever @simonapietra @1-800-fantasy @saikikittykusuo @sevikaishot @sugarplumz100 @chaostudi @wxwrites @m-0-mmy-l-0-ver33 @robzo4 @puppyphia @xreadersarchive @boom58 @d3adbrainer @kylorey25 @slutmeoutfortoge @yaeil @sapphicarribean @randomperson291 @mvistl @hellokittyfeenie @literallyimthenerdemoji @nikaachuuuu @prettysupplicant @iamaboringrattat
#arcane#ambessa x reader#ambessa x you#ambessa#ambessa medarda#arcane ambessa#ambessa arcane#ambessa league of legends#arcane angst#arcane fic#arcane drabbles#arcane imagine#arcane x reader#arcane drabble#arcane writing#arcane x gender neutral reader#arcane x female reader#arcane masterlist
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If I say that I'm not used to people misinterpreting my favorite characters, I'd be lying. But the way they get so many things wrong about Inho's character is kinda pissing me off because you KNOW that most of them do it to cancel out the possibility of InHun being *something* more than what's shown so far. You don't ship them, that's fair, frankly I don't care. Everyone's entitled to their own opinion UNTIL your opinion is wrong.
Let's talk about a couple of things I've seen being talked about on tiktok (đ)
âInho joined the games because ilnam said that it'd basically be more fun to play than to watch so he followed his example." loud incorrect buzzer ! Inho has joined the games before, and not only that, he's also a previous winner, so therefore he's very much aware of what it's like to be a part of it, he's experienced them first hand, just like he's experienced the atrocities of it. they've changed him for the worst and possibly caused him a huge trauma âthey're the reason he's lost faith in humanity after allâ so, why would he crave to relive it just for the thrill of it? i, personally doubt he even enjoys watching the game.
âInho didn't look at Gihun with love, he likes to watch him sufferâ Short answer is no. He doesn't like to watch him suffer, neither he looked at him with love, not the pure kind of love at least. Two things can be true at once. Inho spent half the season staring at Gihun because everything about the man intrigued him; His determination, his stubbornness, his kindness, his hope, his heart that's full of love despite the pain he suffered, even the pain in his eyes every time someone got eliminated in front of him as if it was the first time it had happened, as if the cruelty of it all surprised him every damn time. How can someone, who's been through the same things Inho has been through, be the polar opposite of him?
now, the reason(s) that I think Inho actually joined the games for..
(yes I am an Inhun shipper, does that make my opinion a little biased? maybe. do i still believe I'm right? absofuckinglutely.)
Let me clarify this: Inho is NOT a good man, no matter the redemption arc he might get in s3, he'll continue to be a terrible person because nothing will ever erase the blood he's spilled and the evil men he's worked for. BUT at the same time, he's not ALL bad, not like the VIPS and ilnam. See, Inhun are the average "yin-yang" trope in fictional romance, (which I eat up every time and I find it very interesting when it's done the right way, don't get me wrong) Inho is bad but there's some goodness somewhere deep inside him. And the only person who's brought it to the surface is Gihun. Sure, he does think Gihun is naive, but he's also the only person who's actually challenged him, who's "forced" him to get his stupid head out of the dirt and look around him, even for a short while and Inho definitely liked what he saw. Honestly, it wasn't even that hard for Gihun to do so because the goodness in Inho wanted and waited for someone to pull him out of the dirt, he wished for someone, something to give him hope for humanity or.. anything. Anything that'll help him escape from his misery.
You can definitely argue that he joined the games to befriend Gihun, to gain his trust and stop his plans when the time comes, which is half true. But keep in mind that he needed to justify his choice to join the games. He's not a VIP nor the mastermind to simply get to do that without consequences. He's the frontman, the one who controls and manages everything. He's needed for the games to work and go by smoothly and successfully without unnecessary losses and problems. Gihun would only cause problems, Inho knew that very well and yet he chose to put him in it once again. He recklessly made that choice, risking pretty much everything because of his inner conflict. A part of him wanted Gihun to prove himself to him, that there's indeed good that'll save the world and the rest of him wanted to prove to Gihun that everything he so strongly believes in is merely a fantasy.
Joining the games and befriending Gihun was the only way for Inho to see the real him, without the heroic mask he puts on every time he faces the frontman. I think he believed that someone as extraordinary as Gihun will either break in front of him and he will end up disappointed by the human kind once again, or Gihun will change everything about the way he thinks for the better. But the problem is that Inho hopes for both of those things at the same time.
And that was Inho's arc in season 2. His inner conflict and how it will affect him, the game and Gihun later on.
#i hope this makes sense#english is not my first language so i apologize for any grammatic errors#anyway I'd love to hear your thoughts as well just be nice#inhun#squid game#squid game 2#457#player 456#player 001#frontman#hwang in ho#gihun x inho#in ho x gi hun
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I was daydreaming today at college and thought about Leon absolutely ravaging me in my wedding dress... Would you be able to write the reader teasing him at the wedding all evening long, feeling him up, making him jealous until the end of the night when he finally gets you alone and just goes totally feral?! Your work is amazing, please never stop đ„°đđ”âđ«đŠ
YES, I CAN ANON!
I love this!!! I hope I did the idea justice! I did Death Island Leon because I rewatched it and he's on my mind. I rambled sorry this took so long, I needed it to be done right!
Warnings: Smut, MNDI, Fluff, Teasing, Praise Kink, Cowgirl, Oral (F receiving) Jealousy, Hidden touches, Comfort
Death Island! Leon Kennedy x AFAB!Reader
Words: 3.8k
Leon never thought he would get this chance, marriage was always just a distant dream, one that always seemed impossible with his job and lifestyle. Until you came along and made him feel easy to love for once. Your smile manages to brighten any mood he might be in. His home was dark and bare now filled with warmth and love, decorated with things that reminded him of how far you had both become. He made it his life's mission to ensure you never stopped smiling and never faced anything like he had. Your protection was his top priority as he kept you separate from his work life, a little hidden secret in this world. One for just him to enjoy.
The isle was decorated in soft greens and browns, the sun felt warm for once as it fell over his features. It felt like God was finally giving him a break from the whirlpool of life he was handed. He couldn't stop the swaying of his feet or fiddling with the tie that felt too tight around his neck. Neither of you wanted a big wedding, limiting your guest list to just close friends and family but the room still felt full. Despite the small number of people you had invited, their adoring stares at him and their whispers about what you might look like today didn't help. Leon didnât care what dress you picked out, he gave you the budget to get the biggest one if you wanted it. All that mattered to him was that you were happy and at the end of the day were with him in an enteral promise. One he knew went deeper than simple love.Â
Ignoring the waves of anxiety he felt, all the attention began to feel too much without you by his side to make it more bearable. Leon made sure to put on the biggest smile that he could muster up as he watched the wedding party begin to filter through the aisle. Soft instrumental music complimented them as they all walked down. The once red carpet is now being decorated with a range of petals as your niece went down alongside her brother who carried the rings. Everyoneâs attention was drawn to them, their adorable stumbles thankfully gave him a chance to let out a shaky breath before he had to reach for the velvet box from the young boy. It felt heavy, similar to the feeling when he had the last velvet box in his pocket; a decision he would never come to regret in his life. He had thought about this moment for months, his dreams being filled by adding to the collection of rings he had given to you, all in a romantic promise that was tying your souls together forever.
Leon had memorized the order in which everyone was going to be coming through, all of them finding their place on the respected sides. Their smiles warmed his heart at how happy they were for the both of you. The love crashed over him in waves as your family welcomed him in with open arms. The change in song made his heart rate begin to pick up as you walked down. You looked like an angel, one that was finally ready to take him to salvation - a gift sent from the heavens for all of his hard work and trauma. You smiled at Leon, watching as his eyes twinkled with tears of happiness. He deserved this; there was no one more than deserving of your love. Your answer to his proposal was the easiest choice you had ever made. Just as you were for Leon he was the same for you.Â
You could feel his hands shake as he lifted your veil, the sound of everyone around you melting away as he gazed upon your features like he was memorising them despite knowing that he does it every time he wakes up before you in the morning. You watched as his smile grew softer, his body trying to reign in his emotions as the tears fell slightly down his face. You felt the ghost of his breath against your palm as you wiped it away for him. Your touch is just a ghost of the love he knew you had for him. His love was always intoxicating to you. Helping your brain become fuzzy so you forget about the world around you. The nerves you had at the start of the day are now settled in a calm and peaceful feeling. That's what you loved about him, his endless ability to ease your anxiety. He was your bridge, your stable wall to lean on if you needed it. Leon had given you everything you needed and more in life; you will always be thankful for that.Â
Your hands slotted in his perfectly; Leon was grasping them tightly in case you would fade away right in front of him like you were some dream he would wake up from. The vows you shared today would never be broken; the endless devotion you both shared was witnessed by everyone else in the room. âI love youâ You whispered to him leaning on his shoulder as you both waited for the end of the ceremony. Leon glanced down at you, his eyes sparkling with more unshed tears, his eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled. âI love you moreâÂ
It felt like the world stopped as you turned to face each other before you finally kissed marking your new journey as Mr and Mrs Kennedy. Neither of you needed this, the large fancy wedding or the certificate you were now both signing with shaky hands and large smiles. You both know the love you shared was solidified with the care you put towards each other in each other darkest moments. There was no end to this life without Leon being by your side.
You grasped his hand tightly as you both ran down the aisle, your laughter filling the air mixing in with the confetti that fell around you. Leon pulled you back into him, greedy for another kiss before the true celebrations began, the fabric of your dress swirling around his feet as you collided with him.Â
The rest of the evening felt like a blur, the both of you being dragged around by family and friends for endless photos. The camera flash soon became a permanent fixture every time you blinked. Yet, as everyone settled down for the evening meal, plates of food were being wafted around the room and the waitresses handed them out; Leon didnât miss the longing looks you gave him. The squeezes of his thigh underneath the table as your hand inched higher and higher. Your delicate fingers brushed along the front of his trousers all whilst glancing at him with an adoring and innocent smile. It was driving him insane with how casual you were being about it. âYou alright there honey? You look a little flusteredâ you giggled in his ear, leaning towards him. His smirk grew on his face, his eyes hidden by his dark hair as he turned to look at you. âSomeone seems to be starting something Iâm not sure they can finishâ He teased. Normally Leon would have touched your skin and teased the fabric of your underwear groaning at the feel of the arousal he knew was drenching the thin fabric but your damn dress was too big. He was beaten by layers of white fabric.Â
âWeâve still got many hours before I can show you what's underneath this dressâ you whispered again. His face flushed - turning a dark pink as his brain tried to decipher what you meant. To his credit he recovered quickly, hiding his flushed cheeks from the guests with a kiss. Coos and chuckles surrounded you as you both shared this moment. When he pulled away his eyes narrowed, a warning. That if you continued then you would be in for a long night, but then when did you ever listen to him?
The night continued with tear-jerking speeches from close family and friends and you now both stood outside the doors waiting for the events organizer to announce you both as Mr and Mrs Kennedy for your first dance. His hand held yours firmly, almost like if he loosened his grip he would wake up from this dream.Â
âReady?â You asked him, looking up at his stubble-coated face in adoration. He never got used to your twinkling eyes when you looked at him, perhaps he never would. He didn't need the three words that meant so much to many people - your eyes told your story, your feelings. âTo embarrass me with how badly I danceâŠnoâ he teased a toothy grin filling his features. Your laugh was better music than the song lined up for the rest of the evening. His own eyes crinkled once again as his smile grew. You heard your name announced and both jogged out onto the dance floor.. confetti and cheers surround you once again.Â
Leon's hands gripped your hips tightly as they swirled you around, opting to stick to simple swaying and a few spins. You didn't care, you were smiling anyway. That was another thing you did that caused him to fall in love with you - how easily you accepted the simplest things he gave you. The size of his gestures is never an issue with you. When the song slowed down he bought you closer, his hands lowering to the swell of your ass. Your arms wrapped around his neck, fingers toying with the soft strands of his hair. His aftershave was intoxicating, filling your senses as you tucked yourself closer, his head resting on yours. The moment was peaceful, perfect. One he would remember every time a mission got too much, or he needed a reason to get back up after he's been slammed down numerous amounts of times.Â
The moment was broken when one of the bridesmaids tapped him on the shoulder holding out a polaroid to him. He glanced briefly at you not failing to notice the large grin on your face. It was comical how wide his eyes went when he looked at the small picture; a choked breath following as his cheeks flushed. âWhat the fuckâ he chuckled as he turned back to you, tucking away the Polaroid in his pocket before anyone else got to see. âThere's plenty more where that came fromâ you spoke. Leon pulled you close again, trapping you against his body with a large grin on his features as his lips ghosted your skin. âYou little minxâ he whispered in your ear, his breath tickling the shell of yours. You smiled at the contact, at the small graze of his lips against your neck. Your fingers tugged gently at the hairs on the nape of his neck, swirling the soft strands in small circles. He felt you slip away leaving his arms to merge in with the rest of the dancefloor. Your white dress twirled around you as you greeted your friends. He watched with a smile, seeing your happiness leak into the people around youâŠinto himself.Â
Your feet moved gracefully along the dancefloor as you sauntered back to him often during the rest of the night. Interrupting and saving him from boring conversations with older relatives, your lips kissing in the pattern he knew would be repeated later when you were both alone. The collection of polaroids started to thicken his pockets as your bridesmaids continued to hand them to him, his face flushing each time - eyes narrowing as he found you giggling across the room from him. He was thankful as people started to wish you luck and goodnight, all heading off to their rooms. Instantly beginning to look for you to drag you to the bridal room. Leon found you helping the servers gather the remaining drinks handing them glasses over to the bar. Your hair was wild, strands sticking out of the braid it was neatly made into earlier in the day. Your makeup was smudged and the lipstick is virtually nonexistent but to him, you still looked just as beautiful at the start of the day.Â
He felt giddy as you both stumbled your way back to the room, practically running through the halls. Your smile grew as you heard his laugh, the sound bouncing down the corridor. His hand held onto yours firmly not once letting go. It felt like you were teenagers again, running through the school corridors to escape school. You wished you had met him sooner in life, so you could have loved him sooner. Helped through the horrors he had told you, showed him a world of love and affection sooner before he fell into the habits he wasn't proud of. His lips attacked yours as soon as you got through the door, the key card discarded on the desk landing on it with a clatter. Your hands slid under the shoulders of his blazer. Leon smiled into the kiss, his shoulders shaking it off in a poor attempt to help, the fabric landing with a thud on the floor.Â
The contents of it scattered along the floor, his phone now hidden somewhere you'll both be scrambling to find in the morning. He smirked at the Polaroids that had now scattered everywhere, the photos of you that he kept hidden now a reminder of your promise. He felt his cock throbbing against the fabric of his trousers, he almost cummed at the idea of sinking into you finally after today. He pulled you towards the bed, pushing you backwards until your knees hit the edge of the bed. Leon wished he hadnât just lost his phone so he could have taken a photo of you sprawled out on the bed beneath him surrounded by the rose petals the hotel staff had thrown on the bed. Your eyes were intense as they looked at him with pure lust, you always did love him in his suits.Â
âYou have a promise to keep?â He teased, bending down briefly to collect a polaroid off the floor - holding it out to you so you could see throwing it on the bed next to you. His hands began to push the layers of fabric up your legs, exposing your hips. He smiled at the garter that was still around your thigh. Leonâs head instantly lowered, his teeth tugging it down your leg, ignoring the chuckle that left your lips as he struggled to get it over your shoe. When he raised his head again you smiled at his smug look, the elastic band hanging from his teeth like a trophy.Â
âYou were meant to do that earlier and then see which one of your friends was getting married nextâ You smiled as you pulled it from his teeth, discarding the fabric somewhere else in the room. âGuess Iâll just have to marry you againâ He spoke, kissing up your thighs disappearing amongst the fabric. âAlready? We just made our vowsâÂ
Leonâs head shot up again his hair falling over his eyes as he looked at you. âIâll chant them to you every night if I have to. Iâll never forget them, nor will I let you forget them.âÂ
You knew if you wanted him to he would always be willing to do what it takes to prove he is forever grateful for your unwavering love and patience over the past few years. The same soft hands that now tugged his head towards your dripping cunt pulling him out of one of the worst states heâs ever been in. He didnât like thinking about what would have happened if you hadnât given him the final shove to pour the drink away. To stop for the first time since his 20s. His fingers looped in the waistband of the white lacy thong pulling it down your legs. You spread them, showing off your soaked core that he had skipped the cake for. Opting to save his appetite for a sweeter dessert instead.Â
âI meant every single wordâÂ
His mouth instantly latched on, sucking up the sweet arousal you were already dripping for him. Your legs wrapped tightly around his head, the fabric hiding him from sight as he worked his magic. Leon would spend hours like this if he wanted to, his head buried in a sacred space you kept so perfect for him. Forever - until death - now the only person that would be able to taste the sweet drink you created for him. Your legs shook as his tongue flicked against the sensitive bud, his nose occasionally brushing against it as he enthusiastically licked long stripes up your folds.Â
You felt the incoming orgasm, your thighs shaking uncontrollably around his head only spurring Leon on to continue his assault of pleasure faster. He groaned when you finally spilt on his tongue, he lapped it up like he was dehydrated. You supposed he was, with the incoming date of your wedding you both barely had enough time for this. You moaned at the sight of his chin covered in his drool and your cum, his tongue swiping across his lips making sure he lapped it all up. He always was a messy eater.Â
You could taste yourself on his as he crawled up to place a kiss on your lips. âHow expensive was the dress?â he asked whilst nipping at your neck. His stubble was prickly against your skin. âVery. You gave me no budget rememberâ You chuckled, pulling at his hair causing him to look at you. âSo if I fucked you in it, it would be a waste of money?âÂ
âWe can always get it dry cleanedâÂ
He chuckled pulling away from you again. He was too slow at unbuttoning his shirt, you sat up, crawling towards the edge of the bed on shaking legs to help him. The fabric was discarded somewhere in the room with a thud. His hands worked on his trousers, his belt clinking loudly as they fell to the floor. You bit your lip at the sight of his pre cum on his boxers, both old and new stains. âLook at what you did to me all day, in this dress, the touches at dinner, the fucking photos. The day dragged on for far too longâ He mumbled lowly. You loved it when he did this when his octave lowered with need and frustration for wanting you. Your teasing finally pushed him over the edge and now he had a taste there was no point in preventing him from the full meal. He was going to get it anyway.Â
You stood up from the bed, spinning the both of you so he fell against the soft sheets. He waited for you to undo the dress, to let the fabric hide his trousers. Instead to crawled above him, pushing him towards the headboard. Leon pulled his boxers off, his cock thumping against his stomach at your approach. You smirked at the tip, angry and red as it waited for you. Dribbles of pre cum decorating it like candle wax, he was always so pretty.
 A large sigh from the both of you filled the room as you finally sank on him. The sight is hidden by the layers of the dress now pooling around you both. He could admire the way the bodice fit against your form, the delicate lace hems making you look even more magical. You were perfect, always were and always will be.Â
Your hips moved too slow for his liking, the pleasure he needed not building up fast enough. Tired of your teasing his hips met your own. The lazy thrusts hit deeper and deeper as they collided with your own, brushing against the entrance of your cervix. He was always larger than you remembered, no amount of foreplay ever prepared you for the glorious stretch he gave you each time you fucked. His small whisps of hair tease your already sensitive clit.Â
He could feel you quiver above him, your head thrown back with a large smile plastered on your face. He watched the rise and fall of your chest as it pushed out the breathless whimpers. Your fingers dug into his shoulders, the freshly painted nails leaving small crescent shapes along his already uneven skin. He wouldnât mind a few more scars, not if they were left by you tonight. A forever memory etched onto his skin as well as in his mind.Â
Had all his prayers finally been answered? All of his years of suffering finally bought to a close with the clench of your walls around his cock and a promise to love him until he gave his final breath. âI fucking love you, Mrs KennedyâÂ
Hearing it made it more real somehow, made the whole day finish with another orgasm from you as you collapsed against him. Your sweaty skin cooling his down. He was so close, to his own ending. To coat and fill you with himself, the way it will always be now. Leon was now the only one who got this pleasure, that was allowed to do this.Â
He was quick to move you, slipping out only briefly to place you on all fours. His cock slipped back into you; âIâŠwillâŠalwaysâŠfuckingâŠloveâŠyouâ he chanted with each thrust. Driving his cock deep into the velvet walls. Your whimpers and whines spur him on along with the begs to go faster and harder. The two of you lost in the moment, in the feel of each other. His ring was cool against your hip as it pressed into the flesh from his grip. Your dress rustles around you with every movement. Nothing else mattered, not the endless piles of paperwork on his desk waiting for him when he would return to the office, the complaints of customers you would eventually face in your own return to work.Â
Everything could wait. Nothing would stop him from feeling this, the way you clenched and sucked him back in again. Trapped him in as he finally climaxed. His warmth flooded you, leaking out as he pulled away. Your shaking legs finally gave up as you fell onto the bed. A smile plastered on your face from where it was smooshed against the pillows. His fingers worked on undoing the back of the dress, your skin exposed to the cold. Fuck, he needed this sight engraved into his brain forever. You sat up, allowing the fabric to slip off your form with his help. The dress left to crease and crumple on the floor as you both tucked away in bed.Â
He held you tightly against his chest, his heartbeat thumping loudly against your ear. Despite the great sex, this was what you cared about the most, the vulnerable moments where you slept the best. âGoodnight loveâ He whispered into your hair as he pressed a kiss into the crown of your head. You smiled against his skin, placing a kiss above the spot of his heart. Your fingers lazily traced along the scars that littered his chest until the room was filled with the soft snores of the newly weds.Â
#~mads rambles#leon kennedy#resident evil x reader#leon s kennedy x reader#leon kennedy x reader#resident evil#leon kennedy x you#resident evil fanfiction#~mads~mailđ#leon scott kennedy#leon kennedy smut#leon kennedy angst#leon kennedy death island#leon kennedy imagine#leon s kennedy#leon s kennedy smut#leon s kennedy x you#leon scott kennedy x reader#leon smut#resident evil leon#leon resident evil
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Omg really? Wow, thank you so much. That's honestly amazing to me, considering this was one of the hardest for me to write in Smoke Eater. đ
(But after reading your wonderful review, thank you for making me cry. đ„čđđ)
First of all, please don't apologize for the heartfelt thoughts you want to share with me. No matter how long or short, I love hearing what you think about my writing, and this is genuinely one of the best reviews I've ever received, because I can tell it came from the heart.
What's crazy is my mom and I also used to watch Chicago Fire together when she was trying to recover from surgery (where she had terrible complications and wasn't well for a long time). It became her comfort show, and I was happy to introduce it to her/have that bonding time where it kept her from thinking about her pain. But I'm so glad you thought to come here to perk yourself up after a rewatch.
honestly I have so many thoughts for each wonderful chapter but I would feel super guilty for spamming :â) this chapter in particular though, hits me harder than anything iâve ever read before â not in a bad way!đ€
lol girl that's the best kind of spamming. I'd never be upset with that! đ Oh good, I'm glad it doesn't hit in a bad way. I was concerned about that for readers when I was first posting this part of the story. đ
my mom had epilepsy, and I was her caretaker pretty much my entire life. I connect so much with this story because it, feels like iâm reading a mirror, if that makes any sense at all. with all the doctors and the worrying, itâs written so authentically, which is understandable after reading your authorâs note. iâm so sorry youâve experienced such difficult hardships and losses yourself honey, I offer my sincere condolences. and iâm sending you the biggest hugs đ«đ€đ€
I'm sending you the biggest hugs right back, friend. I'm so sorry about what your mom went through, and what you went through too. Being a caretaker is not easy. I've seen it enough in my family that that's what I drew from in order to write this, so I'm glad it felt authentic to your experience. đ«đ
now these lines/parts specifically had me crying like a baby lol. december of 2021, my mom had to have surgery at the start of the month. her recovery was going a little slow, but well. however she passed away overnight, 2 days after christmas, completely unexpected. the day before she had been doing so well tooâ she had more energy and was more mobile without needing as much assistance. came to find out later thatâs something nurses call a surge? :/ either way, those moments in particular really tugged at my heartstrings â€ïžâđ©č
I'm so sorry for your loss, my friend. It is blind sighting when it comes so unexpected like that. I haven't shared this publicly, but something similar happened with my grandfather this past December. His health declined suddenly, to the point we had to take him to the hospital. After seeming to get better after a few days, he went downhill even harder, and he passed away in mid-December. It's not the same thing as your situation, but I understand the feeling of "why did this happen like this?" But now he's at peace with my grandma. And your mom is free from her pain and discomfort too. â€ïžâđ©čâ€ïžâđ©č
this line too. I felt this way for so long after my mom died. I didnât get the final cause for a while since she passed at home and not at a hospital, and to this day I wish I could go back. wish I couldâve done something different. but SUDEP (or, sudden unexpected death in epilepsy) is completely unpreventable so far. I just find it so cruel that this illness I spent my whole life helping her with, ended up taking her anyway and nothing I did mattered in the end. so reading that line, how she broke down, and everything she had been holding in, it really made my heart ache but I also felt less alone in a way.
And I'm sure you did everything you possibly could, just like the reader in this story. đ I didn't know about SUDEP, but I have a family member who takes medication for his epilepsy, so I'm going to be reading up on that. I'm so glad that this simple line made you feel less alone in any small way -- I also thought when I was writing that it not only fit what the character was going through, but that other people who've been caretakers for a family member like this would be able to identify with this feeling as well.
everything that followed, itâs like reading a reflection. I shutdown and just went through the motions afterwards too, but ohhh how nice it wouldâve been to have a dean â€ïž his support, how he takes care of her, itâs so heartwarming. and itâs really comforting to read. <3
It's that awful "autopilot" thing that somehow allows us to get through the aftermath, in a way, right? If only we could all have a Dean to support us in those moments. Somehow, reading hurt/comfort fics help me feel better too though. đđ
a lot of my family distanced themselves afterwards which, it is what it is. that being said, the sentiment in this story of family isnât always blood resonates with me a lot. my support system is really small, but they chose to be there for me unlike my blood relatives so, that theme in this story means so much â the way deanâs chosen family shows up for her as well, itâs so sweet. đ
Ugh really? I'm sorry to hear that. đđ But thank you for pointing that out -- that is the overarching theme of this story, a la SPN style. đ„č Your chosen family can be just as powerful, if not more, than your blood family. And in this story, Dean's family is basically "adopting" the reader/you into it. đ
I guess the gist of what iâm trying to say, is I wholeheartedly adore this series and it truly means so much to me đ€ I appreciate your work so much, and I love the unique feeling each piece of your writing brings đđ I know I may sound like a broken record but truly I donât think I can ever put into words how much I love your blog. you are an absolute sweetheart, truly a light peeking out between cloudy skies đ
Wow, I really did tear up of happiness. Thank you. đ„čđ„č I appreciate you right back for reading this story and connecting with it like you did. And I'm so glad that you enjoy my blog!! I've only been here on Tumblr for about 2 years actively, but connecting with people like you is what's keeping me here, and honestly gives me energy to write and express myself when I'm going through hard times.
This chapter specifically was very difficult for me to write for multiple reasons, as you saw in my AN, but again it makes me all the more grateful that this is the chapter you connect with the most. I'm very sorry for your loss though. I'm really touched that this story can give you some small comfort. đ
(And no it's not too much. Thank YOU for taking the time to share this with me.)
Smoke Eater - Part 11
Pairing: Firefighter!Dean Winchester x F. ReaderÂ
Summary: Dean Winchester is the cocky, but well-respected Lieutenant at Firehouse 25. He leads by example, but heâs also known to break a few hearts. Heâs starting to crave something heâs never had, though. Something stable. Something real.Â
Thatâs when he meets you, on a truly terrible day, trapped in a rickety old elevator.  Â
đ„ Series Masterlist
Word Count: 5,400 Tags/Warnings: Major angst warning. But also major hurt/comfort.
Part 11: âHeart of the Homeâ
You sat very still.
Your hands were gripped together in your lap when the doctor entered. He was tall and lean and blonde, and he wouldâve reminded you of your boss, except this man had a kinder face.
You were sitting on the edge of your grandfatherâs bed, hoping the doctor would say the bloodwork and scans came back fine. That they wouldnât need to admit George into the hospital for further testing. That he could go home in the morning.
But your life had never been quite that easy.
âOkay, George. Iâm sorry, but we need to admit you,â said the doctor.
He explained that while the malignant tumor of his cancer had been removed last year, the scans that had been done last month hadnât been able to detect the bright spots now formed on Georgeâs lungs and lymph nodes.
The oncologist would have to confirm, but you all knew where this was headed. Likely those âbright spotsâ were tumors.
George nodded slowly at first, taking it all in. He asked what his options were, as far as treatment.
âYour oncologist will go over those options with you,â the doctor replied. âWeâre going to move you up to Oncology shortly.â
George thanked him.
And you sat very still.Â
A hand fell on your arm, finally earning your gaze. Georgeâs face was oddly calm, though the worry in his eyes was for you. You realized that heâd gently called your name, though you hadnât heard him. Your ears were ringing.
His mouth parted to tell you something, but nothing came out. So instead, he tugged you into his arms, and he heaved a long sigh.
âI guess weâre here again,â he admitted. He let out a chuckle. âThe Lord does like his testsâŠbut maybe that car accident was a blessing in disguise, huh?â
You heard his voice, but your mind was buzzingâmainly with the doctorâs words, and with a bone-deep feeling that threatened to consume you.
Your car, your fault. Options, again. Here again.
Your fault.
When you didnât answer, George pulled away a bit to give you a questioning look.
âSweetheart?â he tried. You laid a hand on his arm.
âYou still havenât eaten dinner, have you?â you asked. Neither had you, for that matter. âIâll get us something that isnât rubbery turkey.â
George blinked at you, confused, with a growing edge of worry.
âIsnât Dean getting your meds? Why donât you wait for him toââ
âIâm fine,â you said, already getting up to grab your purse. âIâll be back.â
George called your name again, but the ringing in your ears was now pulsing in time with your heartbeat.
You made your way down the hall to the lobby at a brusque clip, even with your neck brace on. You didnât see Dean, but he certainly saw you as he was walking back into the hospital. Frowning, he followed and called out to you.
You slowed when you saw him, and he soon caught up with you. He rested a hand on your back.
âHey, where you goinâ?" he asked.
âWe havenât eaten in a while. Iâm going to the cafeteria,â you said. Though you seemed distracted, your eyes meeting his only briefly. It triggered a small spidey sense running up Deanâs spine.
He gave you your prescription pain medication, which you took with a small âthank you.â
âEverything okay?â he asked. âHowâs George doing?â
âFine. Heâs resting,â you said. And by the look of you, that seemed to be true. But he spotted the tremble in your hands when you took the pill bottle package from him. It made him stop you when you tried to keep walking down to the cafeteria.
âOkay, you wanna run that by me again?â Dean asked.
You frowned, and your brows knit together. âWhat?â
âIs there something going on?â he pressed.
You sighed, but you didnât answer him. You looked exhausted, and like youâd rather swallow your own tongue than speak. You shook your head and laid a hand on his wrist.
âIâm fine. Dean, thank you for everything you did tonight, but you still have to work tomorrow. Go home, get some rest,â you said.
You turned from him again. That was your first mistake. He reached out and grasped your hand to stop you.
âHey, wait a minute,â he said.
âWhat?â you said in irritation. Your second mistake was not being able to look at him.
Dean was frowning in earnest now. Worry clawed in his gut, which was also telling him not to let you walk away from him. His grip shifted to hold both of your arms and move directly in front of you. He dipped his chin, trying to get you to meet his eyes.
âCome on, sweetheart,â he said gently. âI need you to talk to me.â
You inhaled a shuddering breath. A wave was rising inside you, threatening to pull you into its undertow. Your eyes burned, red and shining. Dean finally saw it when you raised your head, what little you could. Your mouth began to quiver, looking into his eyes. And it was done.
You could no longer be still.
Dean held you when you fell apart in the hallway.
Dean called out of work the next day to stay with you and George. Gordon would be acting Lieutenant until his next shift, and Dean was sure the man would take full enjoyment out of it.
He couldnât care about that right now though. He felt that his place was here, being your quiet wall of support while you and George and the oncologist talked about treatment options.
âNormally, at the stage weâre in, I would be recommending chemotherapy,â said Dr. Benton.
âNormally?â you echoed.
âAt the rate this is progressing, the treatment would have to be aggressive,â he said. His gaze focused on George. âHowever, at your age, and the current state of your overall healthâŠat this point, I donât think the rigors of treatment would be worth diminishing your quality of life.â
âWhat are you saying?â you asked. Your voice cut like a whip, earning the other menâs gazes.
George was the first one to lay a hand on your arm. âYou know what it means, honeyâŠheâs saying it ainât worth it.â
âOf course, itâs worth it,â you retorted. With your brows furrowed and lips pursed, your eyes went from him to the doctor. âJust because heâs older, we shouldnât even try? Is that what youâre saying, doctor?â
At that, even Dean drew closer to lay a hand on your back. Meanwhile, George squeezed your arm.
Benton shook his head gravely. âThatâs certainly not what Iâm saying.â
âHow much time would I get, if I started treatment,â George asked, before you could volley further with the doctor.
Benton met the other manâs gaze.
âIâm going to be honest with you, George. You may get a few more weeks, or even a few months. But that is a best-case scenario.â
Dean drove you all home that day, after George decided to formally waive treatment. Both men knew you were angry in your silence, but neither one wanted to press you. Dean was too wary, and George was too tired.
Once he was settled in bed, you hadnât even left his room yet before you grabbed a notepad off his desk and wandered into the hall. You started to make a list of things you still needed from the grocery store, among other things. Dean took that piece of paper out of your hands.
âGood. Iâll handle this,â he said. âMeanwhile, you can get upstairs, take a shower, take your meds, and get some sleep.âÂ
You frowned at him. âYou havenât slept either, Dean.â
âIâm used to it,â he said, giving you a wink and a slight smile. Overnight shifts could be a bitch at a firehouse, but Dean was no stranger to having his sleep interrupted.
âListen to him, honey. Heâs speaking sense,â George called from inside his room. The bedroom door was still open. He was settling into his bed while trying to stifle a cough. He sipped at a cup of water youâd brought for him.
Still, you looked reluctant. Dean held your arms and pressed a kiss to your forehead.
âCome on,â he said. âYou were in an accident yesterday. Youâve had one hell of a night. You need your rest, or youâll be no good to anyone.â
And if you pushed yourself much more, he worried that heâd have to take you right back to the hospital. Dean would rather not have that scare so close to the last one.
He brushed your cheek with gentle fingers. With the limited mobility your neck brace provided, you did your best to look up at him. Your eyes were softer.
âOkay,â you breathed.
âOkay? All right, good,â Dean said. You held onto his jacket for a moment, leaning against him.
âThank you,â you whispered. You felt the burn of tears behind your closed eyelids. A few of them squeezed past and slipped down your cheeks. Dean held your face, brushing the tears away with his thumbs.
âHey, Iâm here, all right? Just let me help you,â he said. âYou can lean on me when you need to.â
âI havenât had that in a long time,â you admitted. âPart of me doesnât know how to lean.â
âI get that,â Dean said. But you both knew that there was a long and difficult road ahead. He knew he didnât have to remind you of it. âWhatever you need, you just tell me, okay? If nothing else, Iâve got a strong pair of shoulders.â
Somehow, you smiled. You pressed your forehead against his chest and inhaled deeply, to steady yourself.
âThat you do, Lieutenant.â
You left for your room soon after, but not before you brought him down to you for one more tearful kiss.
Dean then watched you climb up the stairs to your room and nearly went up to help you, but he heard George call his name. Dean ventured back into Georgeâs room and heeded his beckoning hand.
âYou hungry? I can scramble some eggs or something before I hit the store. I think I saw two more left in the carton,â Dean said. George shook his head.
âCome âere a sec.â
Dean took the hint and sat on the edge of the bed.
âI just wanna thank you for everything you did yesterday. Everything youâre still doing for us,â George said. He looked exhausted, but whatever he wanted to say was important enough to fight off sleep. He clasped a hand on Deanâs arm.
âYou donât have to,â Dean replied.
George huffed. A smile made his eyes gleam brighter.
âI knew you were a special one, Dean Winchester. Knew it the night I met ya, on your very first date with her.â
Dean blinked, but his pause drifted into a reserved smile.
âHowâs that?â he asked.
âWell, Iâll be honest. When I heard that black Chevy rumble like hellâs wheels onto the driveway, I thought I might have to worry about you,â George chuckled.
Deanâs lips quirked.
âBut no, it wasnât that. It wasnât the pretty flowers, or our mutual love of killer sharks,â George quipped, making Deanâs smile more genuine. âIt isnât your job either, or the fact that you saved her. I just believe that you can see a manâs mettle in his eyesâŠand I saw it in you when I shook your hand that night.â
Dean took that in for a moment. His hand flexed over his knee. Then he met Georgeâs gaze, though he didnât know what to say. Sometimes though, honestly was the best bet.
âIâm sorry for what youâre going through,â he said at last. âI canât imagineâŠâ
George let out a breath through his nose. âIâll tell you a secret.â
He pointed to a picture frame on his bedside. It was of him and his wife, Sophie, when they were around your age and Deanâs. The couple were sitting on a pier that hung over the edge of the lake in their hometown.
She held him from behind, with her arms wrapped around his neck. Her long hair was being carried by the wind, getting swept into Georgeâs eyes. He was smiling too hard to care.
âIâm ready to smile like that again,â he said. He had tears in his eyes, but he was already lighter at the thought. âI know itâs selfishâŠbut I think Iâve missed her long enough.â
Dean paused. Then he cleared his throat past a small well of something he couldnât name. He wondered if his dad ever had thoughts like that.
âWell, Iâll let you get your rest,â he said. âIâll be back.â
George nodded and gave Deanâs arm a squeeze. âAll right. Drive safe. Donât hit any goddamn trees.â
He shot Dean a knowing wink, and it almost had the younger man laughing. Georgeâs sense of humor was something else.
Dean then left George to rest. He made sure he had his wallet, keys, and your grocery list before he left your house and went back to the car. He checked his phone and saw a missed callâŠfrom Cas.
Dean was reminded again about Azazel, the kingpin who mightâve ordered a hit on his family. Along with the recent murders and arsons, and the connection from one of the victims to your company, Savage & Co.
Dean returned the call as he climbed into the Impala.
âDean. Everything all right?â Cas asked. âSam filled me in about the accident.â
âYeah, everyoneâs okayâŠwell, not really. Iâll explain later,â Dean replied. âListen, about what we talked about at the bar.â
âYes.â Cas said gravely. âIâd appreciate it if you didnât go to your father about this yet.â
âFunny, I was thinking the same thing.â Dean sighed. âMy girl just got some real bad news. I know you gotta keep digging into Savage & Co., but can you keep her out of it?â
âIs she all right?â
âYeah, more or lessâŠitâs her grandfather.â
âAh, I see,â Cas said. âIâm sorry to hear that.â
âThanks, man. Iâd rather her just focus on what she needs to do right now, you know?â
âI get it. And believe me, weâre keeping the investigation of Nick Savage quiet for now,â Cas said. âBut if we find something, or worse, if I canâtâŠIâll likely need to question her. She works directly with Savage, and from what I can tell, sheâs instrumental in bringing in and maintaining several of his major accounts.â
Dean stopped at a red light and took a moment to rub a hand over his tired face, rubbing his eyes. âYou donât really think sheâs got any idea of what that assholeâs into.â
âIâm not saying she does. But in working so closely with him, perhaps sheâs noticed things about her boss, and the company. Things sheâs kept to herself, out of self-preservation.â
Dean frowned. He didnât want to think about shit like that. It made his stomach churn at the thought of you working for someone who might be doing business with a crime lord, let alone Azazel.
âWell, when that day comes, give me a heads up, okay?â
âWill do.â
âThanks, Cas.â
Dean offered to take another day off to help you, but you wouldnât let him. He needed to go back to work, and you were able to arrange working from home for the next few weeks.
Even Nick couldnât refuse to accommodate you in a situation like this. He knew very well that if he pushed you too hard, youâd go directly to HR.
So he backed off, and told you to take as much time at home as you needed. It allowed you to put him, and that afternoon in his office, away from your mind to focus on taking care of your grandfather.
Though you called your best friend the day you got home from the hospital, AndrĂ©a didnât come by your house to see you and George until the end of the week. She cited mounting projects at work and some kind of tiff with her cousin Meg, but it all sounded like excuses to you.
However, she was gracious enough to bring dinner for the three of you on a Friday night. She cut up with George like normal, and even got him laughing, until a coughing fit forced him to stop. It also took most of the joy out of the rest of the evening.
While George went up to his room to rest, Andréa later joined you in the kitchen. You were washing the dishes, trying to focus on what you were doing. But your mind was buzzing continuously with future tasks and worries. Always, tasks and worries.
âHow are you holding up?â AndrĂ©a asked. She rubbed your back, and you gave her a slight smile.
âAll I can do is make him comfortable, for as long as possible,â you replied. There were tears in your friendâs eyes, but she dabbed them away with the back of her hand.
âWhat do you need? Anything, you just tell me,â she said.
It was a little easier for you to contemplate leaning on Andréa. You had been friends with her for years, and she was like another daughter to George.
On the other hand, asking Dean for help always made you hesitate. What you two had was still so new. You worried that this was too much for your relationship, too fast.Â
âWell,â you sighed as you wiped your hands dry on a kitchen towel. You didnât exactly want to talk about it, but there were things you had to start planning, even if you didnât know the exact timeframe.
However, as soon as you opened your mouth to reply, AndrĂ©aâs cell phone rang. She held up a finger to you and checked it. To your surprise, she actually answered it.
âHey, babe,â she replied with a smile. You heard Bennyâs deep voice on the line, asking a question. âYeah, Iâm still here. Iâm probably leaving soon though.â
She continued her conversation for a few more minutes, but you didnât hear anything after that. A tension headache was sharp behind your eyes, while anger (yes, anger) rolled hot under your skin. Your lips pursed. You busied yourself with straightening up the kitchen until she continued her call for another few minutes.
âSorry about that,â she said, finally turning her attention back to you. âSo what do you need?â
You put away the last dry dish and turned to her coolly.
âNothing.â
Andréa frowned. She knew there was something off with you, but her furrowed brows betrayed her confusion.
âWhat do you mean?â
âNothing,â you repeated. âDonât you need to head out, anyway?â
âNo, I was justâŠwhatâs up with you?â she asked.
âWhatâs up with me is my grandfatherâs dying!â you snapped. You left her in the kitchen, precisely so that sheâd follow you out. You grabbed her purse for her and went to the front door, where you stepped out.
Andréa was dismayed and confused as she followed you out onto the porch. She raised her brows at you when you shut the door and crossed your arms at her.
âI know you, and this isnât just about that. Whatâs the problem?â she asked.
âYou canât seem to detach from your boyfriend for more than five minutes to just be my friend. Thatâs the problem,â you replied. âBut why should I be surprised? Like always, youâre too wrapped up in yourself to consider anyone else.â
Her brows knitted together; she looked hurt by your words, but also defensive.
âHow can you say that when youâve been exactly the same way?â she accused. âSince you met Dean, Iâd be lucky to see you once a weekââ
âI call you every week,â you began, counting the list with your fingers. âYouâre always busy, but you never give me a day that works for you. And when we do make plans, you usually cancel. Why? Because youâre going sailing with Benny. Youâre going to a restaurant, hours away, just to try the new sushi bar beer garden, or whatever the hell. Or youâre going on an impromptu road trip, or youâre planning a summer trip to Greece. Give me fucking break, Dre.â
By now she was frowning angrily, her arms crossed. âYouâre mad at me because I have a life?â
âNo. Iâm happy for you that you found someone. I really am,â you said. âBut we clearly live in two different versions of reality. I just donât have the time or the energy to entertain yours.â
You knew you were being too harsh. You felt incredible guilt as soon as it all left your mouthâŠbut part of you also felt like a weight had been lifted off your chest. The problem was, you still felt heavy. Just in a different way.
Both of you were crying when Andréa left your house.
All too soon, a week became a month. In that time, Dean called you every day to check on you. He spent most of his evenings with you and George when he wasnât on shift. And when he was, sometimes Meg would drop in.
She understood your argument with AndrĂ©a, and she respected you for taking a stand when you needed to. She even confided you that sheâd had similar frustrations with her cousin lately.
But Meg wasnât your only visitor. Ellen had come a few times to bring you lunch and dinner, even breakfast, though you hadnât asked her to. You realized then how close Dean must be to his friends at the firehouse, along with the Harvelles; Ellen also refused to take any money from you for the food.
By the end of the month, George mainly spent his days sleeping. Pain medication made his days nearly painless, but not without struggle. You were doing your best to care for him while continuing to work full-time from home. You were also exhausted, though you refused to admit it.
Today was a better day, however, because George was awake. He was also more aware of his surroundings than usual.
He stopped you from adjusting his pillow so you would sit down on the edge of his bed. He took your hand in his, brushing a thumb over the back of it.
âIâm okay with this, you know,â he said. You pursed your lips, but he stopped you from whatever you were going to say. âI donât want to leave you. You know thatâŠbut Iâm so damn proud of you. Your Gram was, and still isâŠâ
Your lower lip wobbled as you tried and failed to keep your tears at bay. They stung in your eyes and slipped past your defenses, down your face.
âThe house is yours. But if thatâs too hard for you, just sell it,â he said, heaving a deep breath. âItâs just the bones. Youâre the heart. And you always have been.â
You opened your mouth to speak, but not a sound would come out. You held his hand with both of yours and stared down at them. Until his voice once again commanded your attention.
âI always thoughtâŠmoving to the city ruined my daughter. That we shouldâve stayed in Lebanon. That maybe I gave her too much freedom, and I failed her somehow along the way,â George said. His eyes were heavy with old heartache. And yet, they soon began to lighten.
âBut the day we lost a daughter, we gained one too,â he said. Then, he chuckled a little. âAnd I know I never failed with you, sweetheart.â
That proved to be too much for you. He pulled you into his arms like you were still a child, and he held you for a long time while you cried yourself out.
Though he eventually spotted Dean hesitating in the doorway. Heâd probably let himself in with the spare key youâd given him.
George raised a hand from your back and silently beckoned Dean inside his room. He was getting tired, drifting off thanks to the morphine.
âHey, lookie there. The boyfriendâs here,â George whispered with a bit of cheek. You sucked in a breath and raised your head, wiping at your eyes before you turned around. Dean met you with an attempt at a smile and a gentle hand on your back.
âJust got out of work?â you asked. Heâd been on a 24-hour shift, and youâd missed him. You stood and stepped into his welcoming embrace. He dropped a kiss on your forehead.
âYeah. Iâve got the next couple of days off,â Dean said. He greeted George next and asked him if he needed anything.
âJust some water,â the older man replied.
âIâll get it,â you said with a sniff. âNeed to start dinner too.â
âI already brought some food. You like Italian, right?â Dean said, with a subtle smile. It earned your sigh and a grateful smile. He knew very well that it was now one of your favorites. Italian meatballs always reminded you both of your first date.
âThank you,â you said, grasping his hand. He squeezed yours with a nod, before he let you go.
When you were out of earshot, George cleared his throat past a wet cough. Dean reached over and grabbed him a tissue. George took it with a nod. Again, he encouraged Dean to come closer.
âIâm not worried,â George said, between deep breaths. âYou know why?â
Dean just stared back for a moment. He genuinely had no idea what the man might say next.
âTell me,â he said.
âMy granddaughterâs strong. Always has been, because she had to be,â said George. âBut youâre gonna be there when sheâs not.â
Dean considered the weight of that charge. The anxiety in his chest felt familiar; like the day he got his badge at the Fire Academy, knowing then the responsibility he held in his hands.
Thatâs a lot to put on just three months of knowing this girl, came a more selfish thought. It sounded a lot like the guy he used to be, not too long before he met you.
But when Dean thought about you, and what youâd begun to mean to himâŠ
He realized that he only had one answer.
âYes, sir. I am,â said Dean.
George gave a tired smile. âGood man.â
And that night, an agreement was made.Â
In the morning, your grandfather was gone.
Dean held you through what he thought was the worst of your heartbreak. But after that dour morning, it was like a switch flipped inside you.
In the days after Georgeâs death, your shutters came up. You threw yourself into checklists and task after taskâin funeral arrangements and planning and contacting distant relatives and friends.
This was your failsafe. Your version of âautopilot.â And these things needed to get done, after all.
But Dean worried when he no longer saw the softer side of you. Like your heart had been wrung dry.Â
He inevitably had to go back to work, but in between the demanding hours of his schedule, he tried to get you to slow down. He saw the warning signs of you running yourself into the ground. He just didnât know how to help you land.
So Dean picked up slack where he saw it, often without you asking him to. He began fixing the house, one section at a time. He enlisted Bennyâs help, since he actually had a small construction business. Dean even paid for the materials himself without you knowing.
And one sunny afternoon, he took a break from repaving part of the cracked and uneven driveway to grab a beer inside. You were sitting at the kitchen table with stacks of papers all around you, your cellphone on speaker as some kind of elevator music continued to ring on a loop.
âCan you believe Iâve been on hold with the funeral director for 20 minutes?â you told him in irritation. But you didnât truly take sight of him until he came back from the kitchen.
He wore a familiar ensemble of jeans and black undershirt with a plaid shirt, rolled up to his elbows. He was covered in a fine layer of sweat, and his hands were dusty and stained from his work on the driveway. Dean looked tired, and that made you feel guilty.
Meanwhile, he frowned and popped open a beer. âYou want one of these? Looks like you could use one.â
You shook your head. With a sigh, you hung up the phone. Youâd try calling again later. Instead, you focused on the next item of your checklist for today.
âFood. Because weâre gonna need to eat after the service,â you inclined your head. âOkay, still need to come up with a list of caterers, because I donât think I can cook for that many people.â
Dean nodded at that. âLet me talk to Ellen. Sheâll give you a good price, and her food is good.â
You looked up from your notepad and considered him thoughtfully. You wouldnât have thought to cater from a bar, but he was right. Ellen had great food at the Roadhouse.
âOkay, Iâll call her,â you said.
âNo, Iâll call her,â Dean insisted. He set down the beer on the table and leaned his palms flat on its surface. âSweetheart, I told you Iâd help you with all this. You donât have to do it by yourself.â
âDean, youâve done enough,â you replied. Your brows drew together stubbornly. âYouâre paving my driveway right now, for Godâs sake! This is my responsibility, not yours.â
Dean frowned, making you sigh. You leaned back in your seat and crossed your arms.
âLook, weâve only been dating for three months,â you said. And in your mind, a good chunk of that time had been spent in the worst hell of your life. âThis right here? Itâs a lot. Iâm not expecting you to deal with all thisâŠâ
You bit your lip, and your gaze fell away from his as your insecurities took hold. The thoughts that had been plaguing you every night since this all began, on the night of the car accident.
âAndâŠif youâd rather take a break from us for a while, Iâd understand,â you said.
Your voice was more collected than you felt. But that didnât make it any easier when Dean stared back at you, mostly incredulous. You even thought you saw a thread of hurt there, and it made your heartache worsen.
Dean came around to your side of the table. He dragged a chair back and sunk into it, facing you directly.
âYou think thatâs the kind of guy I am?â he asked.
You immediately shook your head. You werenât trying to upset him, or imply that he wasnât reliable, or trustworthy, or whatever was running through his head. You were just trying to be realistic.
Youâre so pragmatic it hurts, as AndrĂ©a had often told you.
âDean, itâs not thatâŠâ you began, a bit helplessly. âI justââ
âJust, nothinâ.â His chair scraped toward you as he reached out for your hand. He made sure you looked him in the eyes when he said this next part.Â
âIâm not leaving you with this.â
Your gaze met his, though you desperately tried to keep your heart from rising into your throat.Â
âIâm not leaving you,â Dean said. His tone, his eyes, his hold on your hand was firm.
For a moment, you stared at him, unblinking, even as tears swam in your eyes.Â
Heâs not leaving you.Â
Not like everyone else in your life.
You were grateful. Too grateful, even, for words.
When you finally broke down into tears, Dean realized what an idiot heâd been. Your wall of stoicism had been just thatâa flimsy wall. Now it was shattered, and so were you.
It scared him just how much, as he gathered you onto his lap and into his arms. You didnât seem to care that he was dirty and covered with sweat. You clung to him strong, and he held you back just as tightly.
âNo matter what I did, it wasnât enough,â you confessed. âYou save people all the time. I couldnât save anyone in my life.â
Dean frowned. He cupped the back of your head, and he felt your tears sliding down his neck. His voice was thick with emotion when he was able to reply.
âOh, baby. Itâs not your fault.â
âI canâtâŠI canât do anything. Anything that matters.â Your voice was a broken whisper. It damn near broke his heart.Â
âNow you know thatâs not true,â he said. âIâm not gonna let you lie to yourself like that.â
You trembled and heaved with sobs, and he continued to hold you.
Just be there, Sam had told him, when Dean had called him from the hospital. Sam reminded him again last week, when George finally passed.
Is that all Iâm supposed to do? Dean thought. His brows furrowed, but he tried to hide his frustration.
He was used to people depending on him. He led a team. Before then, heâd looked out for Sam all his life. Dean had never had to help someone get through this kind of grief though. He just wanted to help you, in whatever way he could.
Because he was worrying, just like you. That whatever he did, it wouldnât be enough.
But he couldnât leave you.Â
I canât, and I wonât, he thought. So he took a breath, and he said the first true thing that came to mind.
âYouâre the strongest woman I know, you know that?â Dean said. He spoke low and steady, but with the conviction he felt. âAnd thatâs a tall order, considering some of the badass ladies Iâve got in my life.â
A smile tugged at his lips when he considered people like Ellen and Jo, Jody and Donna. He mightâve lost his mom, but he and Sam hadnât lacked when it came to influential women in their lives.
âBut I saw it the day we met. I see it every time weâre together,â he continued. âYou work hard as hell. You take care of everyone around youâŠâ
You were still quiet, trying to stifle your crying.
Dean let out a breath. âMan, if you only knew how much youâve been helping me. Keeping my damn feet on the ground with this wholeâŠarsonist mess my dadâs been investigating. Digging up the past, my mom, the whole damn thing.â
With a sniffle, you uncurled from him, just enough to reveal your face. Your grip on his shirt loosened, your palm flattening on his chest. He held your hand there and turned his lips to your forehead. He sensed that you were calming down. That you were listening.
âThat matters to me,â he told you.
You nodded and tightened your hand on his. âMe too.â
Your voice was still shaky, but it sounded a little stronger.
âSee? You might as well face it.â Dean grinned. âYouâre a badass chick with a big heart.â
You snorted in response. Your lips even twitched at a smile. He spied it when he looked down at you. And you rested easier against him as your tears subsided.
âThank you,â you whispered. He dried your cheek with a brush of his hand.Â
âFor what?â he asked.
âFor staying.â
AN: So first off, I'm sorry for the gritty "reality" of this one. It's just where the story took me, though it serves a purpose narratively and for both the reader and Dean's character development.
But also, I think this has just been on my mind, since both my grandmother and great uncle (brother and sister) died within a year of one another due to different forms of cancer. My great uncle passed in May of this year, and my grandmother two years this past October.
Again, I'm sorry if this one was too heavy, but art does imitate life and this was probably my brain trying to express those emotions I couldn't fully make sense of at the time. George will be missed, but will still be felt in the rest of this story, as I'm sure any of you who've lost close family members will understand. đ
Next Time:
The identity of Azazel will finally be revealed in Part 12. But first...
You nodded. âBy the way, it was nice of Sam and Eileen to come. And Meg and Cas.âÂ
Dean smiled.
âThey can be your people too,â he said. âIf you want âem to be.â
You couldnât help it. Your tears brewed and bubbled over. And you moved slowly across the couch to twine your arms around his neck. Deanâs lips tugged at a smile, and he welcomed you with an arm wrapping around your waist.
Both of you were still wearing the same clothes youâd been wearing all day; you in your black dress and Dean in his slacks and white buttoned-down shirt, though by now without the jacket, and the shirt sleeves rolled up to his elbows.
You were infinitely exhausted. But one thing had become clear to you over the past few weeks.
âThank you. Thank you for today, and for every day since we met,â you said shakily.
Keep Reading: PART 12
Dean Winchester Masterlist
Main Masterlist
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dbf!Joel headcanons
warnings: big, though unspecified age gap, 18+ (as always)
note: Uni has been kicking my ass, so Iâve only had time for some headcanons lately. This Joel is very sweet, but Iâm open to writing sleazy or dark Joel, too! If you have requests for any headcanons, I will be able to write them even during this stressful time. Full fics will take me a while longer. Enjoy reading, my loves <3 and feel free to add stuff!
He doesnât really know how to cook well and mostly eats his faves every day but when you stay over more and more he makes an effort to learn and actually finds out he really likes it
Whatever pressure your parents put on you, he relieves it by accepting it rather than trying to fix it for you â you can just exist around him without expectation
He worries the age difference means you donât have much to talk about, so he watches your favourite show that you mentioned and although it certainly wouldnât have been his first pick, it lets him unwind. He likes watching something he knows youâve watched and loved when youâre not around, it makes him feel closer to you
When he first starts looking at you differently he blue balls himself so as not to disrespect you â when he has sex with someone to relieve himself, he accidentally says your name to them
He keeps a polaroid of you in his wallet and cashiers wonder why he smiles at his debit card so much
He finds it hard to stay friends with your dad, because it makes him feel weird about this dynamic with you. He distances himself from your parents after they react badly to the news of your relationship, not because of guilt or cowardice, but because he doesnât tolerate how they treat you
He thought he would hate the gossip after the two of you go public, but when you do, he finds himself imagining knocking you up just so everyone knows what he does to you. He opts for lots of hickeys until kids might be a possibility, but that doesnât stop him from pretending you donât have an IUD when he finishes inside of you
He loves when you wear his clothes, but when you forget your scarf at his place he wears it and enjoys that just as much â it smells like you and he likes the idea of people being able to tell itâs somebody elseâs
When he figures out how much you like him talking to you during sex, he starts using the same voice/phrases in public to get you flustered & wet for him
He keeps everything that reminds him of you, like parking tickets etc. He doesnât do anything with those things, doesnât put them in a box, so they linger around his house, reminding him of you the way photographs would, except more privately
He starts âputting in an effortâ for you when you start dating: styling his hair & wearing clothes he thinks you would prefer, until you tell him you like nothing more than his flannels and band tees and jeans, and although he doesnât tell you, heâs beyond relieved. He realises you like him for him
When you tell your parents, Joel asks your father to hit him because âhe knows he deserves itâ. With time he learns he also deserves your kisses and smiles. Those things coexist within him, he thinks both are true
Despite completely supporting you in your pursuit of a degree & career, he likes when youâre on holiday, waiting around for him in his house wearing nothing but a pair of panties he bought for you & one of his hoodies. During those lazy weeks, he fucks you morning, afternoon, and night: before he leaves, when he gets home, and right before you go to sleep
He buys you a ring during the first week of dating because you mentioned how much you like it. He doesnât give it to you until he knows you feel certain about him â he doesnât want to freak you out. Still, even before that, he sometimes looks at it in its little black box and envisions it on your finger
During your first couple of âpublic datesâ (neighbourhood barbecue where your parents are present etc.) he refrains from touching you much, although everyone knows about your relationship. You have to take his hand and initiate small touches for him to feel more comfortable
It takes him a short while, but then he loves being able to touch you in front of people: a hand on your lower back, an arm across your shoulder, his fingers lacing through yours, him pulling your back against his front and wrapping his arms around you. People stare sometimes (your Dad breaks one or two wine glasses in his hand), but Joel stops caring when he sees how happy it makes you
He tells you that you can change things about his home, that it should feel like your place, too and asks if you want to go shopping for âcandles and stuffâ, but you love being in a space that feels completely like him. Itâs not how your apartment looks, but it makes you feel at ease, like youâre somehow living inside of him
Before he tells you he loves you, he whispers it in your ear when youâre sleeping, hoping your subconscious will somehow pick up on it. When he does tell you while youâre awake for the first time, itâs during breakfast. You stub your toe, and let out a string of curses you must have picked up on from him, and while he presses ice against your foot, kneeling in front of you, he smiles up and tells you: I love you.
The first time you sleep over at his house after he spent the night in your apartment, two brand new bottles of the shampoo and conditioner you use are in his shower. You thank him and jokingly ask why he didnât buy your shower gel, too. He kisses you and tells you he likes when you smell like him.
He likes making you come more times than you thought you could â something about moving in and out of you while you tell him you canât do it again, that youâre done, and then watching you fall apart on his cock anyway, thrills him to the bone. It makes him feel powerful, but part of it is knowing you let him fuck you without expecting an orgasm, that him being inside of you is enough for you to feel good
He doesnât tell you, but he adds your name to his car insurance, so that you can drive it whenever you want
When you figure it out you give him road head every time the two of you drive somewhere â until he almost crashes the car and he forbids you to tempt him while heâs behind the wheel
Heâs so nervous he asks Tommy for help when picking out a birthday gift for you â Tommy goes overboard and the gift turns out to be something completely ridiculous like a pair of huge earrings you would never wear. You tell Joel you donât need a big fuss to feel loved by him. At night, he gives you a present heâs been wanting to give you for a while: he plays you a song he wrote for you on his guitar. Itâs quiet and simple and so perfect you cry for half an hour
He doesnât sleep well when youâre not around, and loves being close to you at night. If he could, heâd sleep nestled inside of you after a round of lazy midnight sex every night
As much as Tommy annoys him, it makes him happy to see how well you two get along. When you become actual friends with Tommy and hang out with him on your own, heâs more than pleased: the two people he loves the most in the world have become close
He would never ask it of you, but when you tell him you have stopped masturbating because he fucks you so often, it pleases him deeply. He likes being the only source of your pleasure. When you are apart for a while because of work/collage etc., he buys you a toy he can control from his phone
He tells Tommy he thinks heâs going to marry you during the first month of dating, which you find out about only on your wedding day during Tommyâs speech
#joel miller x reader#mine#my writing#joel miller game#joel miller#joel miller x you#the last of us part 1#tlou1#joel miller x y/n#dbf!joel#dbf!joel x reader#joel miller headcanons#Joel miller smut#pedro pascal#pedro pascal characters
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omg i love ur account soo bad, i would rlly like to read about Spencer being jealous of Derek, for the reader to comfort him and try to help with his insecurities, lowk sad ik but pleaseee đđ»âïżœïżœïżœïž
Spencer sighed as he watched Derek from afar, talking to a group of women. Each of the girls seemed to be entranced with what the man in front of them was talking about, one of them playing with her hair while the other one kept biting her lip which turned into a not so subtle smirk over time.
Spencer hadnât had the best luck with women, he had a few take interest in him over time, but it never grew into something serious. He blamed himself for not being the archetype of a man girls would usually want from what he saw and no matter how hard he would try to be more appealing, it just wasnât him and he wouldnât be able to keep up the facade for too long.
âWhatâs on your mind, boy wonder?â
Spencer blinked his eyes as you walked over to him and brought him out of his thoughts. Spencer wondered if he should tell you whatâs on his mind or would it be something he would eventually get over after some time. It was hard to hide anything from you though, the sparkle in your eyes made Spencer crack and heâd always tell you whatever it was he was thinking of, you had never judged him for it as well, so he had his answer.
âY/N, be honest, is there anything about me thatâs⊠unattractive?â
âWhat do you mean? I donât think thereâs anything wrong with you.â
âReally?â
You nodded as you took a seat next to Spencer, your hand reaching out and thumb running across the back of his hand. Spencer wasnât one for physical touch, but whenever you showed it it put him at ease.
âWhere is all of this coming from?â
âI look at Morgan at times, the way he talks to women, how he presents himself, the way he is basically and I donât know I just⊠wish I could be that way.â
âIâve always liked the way that you are. Men similar to Derek put me off at first, it makes me feel like they have other intentions, but when we first met only minutes in and you were talking about the differences between plant and human cells and I thought that it was really fascinating.â
Spencer chuckled as he remembered the day you both had met. He was scared that he had messed up his first interaction with you and that you would stay clear of him whenever you would come across in the bullpen, but you did the exact opposite. Youâd always take time out of your day to go talk to Spencer, even if it was the most random subject someone could think of, but you never regretted it and kept coming back for more.
âThere are people out there that adore people like you Spencer and Iâm proud to say that Iâm one of them. Plus, I think youâre cuter than Derek.â
Pressing a kiss to Spencerâs cheek, his eyes went wide as you waved goodbye and he watched you return to your desk, a slight bounce in your step as you strode across the room.
Spencer chuckled as his eyes met the floor, somehow your words set him at ease during times he needed it the most. He didnât know what he had done to deserve someone like you in his life, but whatever it was he was sure heâd do it a thousand times again to have even one more conversation like this.
You can find my masterlist here!
Let me know your thoughts in the comments and like & reblog to support <3
#spencer reid#spencer reid au#spencer reid fic#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid fanfction#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid x you#spencer reid one shot#spencer reid oneshot#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds#spencer reid blurb#spencer reid x gender neutral reader#spencer reid fluff
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House of Whispers (Part 2) - Nicholas Alexander Chavez x fem!reader
summary: Everything comes to a head and (Y/N) is right in the middle.
warnings: 18+, angst, so much arguing srry not srry, unprotected p in v, fingering, cunnilingus, cheating, cursing, outdoor sex, idk what else honestly
required listening: Already Know by DEGA; Anxious In Venice by Superhumanoids
word count: 25,005
a/n: part 2 is here yay!!!! ik this part picks up abruptly but I truly didn't want to split it up into parts </3 curse you Tumblr! anyway this is the last part so pls enjoy. I had so much fun writing house of whispers, idk like I could clearly imagine everything happening in my head crying emoji you guys already know how much I love dragging shi out for no reason. anyway I have some ideas already for other single-part fics, I just need to write them!
Part 1 | Part 2
reblogs, likes, and replies are greatly appreciated and let me know if you'd like to see more!
Over the next few days, the tension only grew.
Valerie settled into her role as the center of attention with a practiced ease that made my skin crawl. She was charming and effervescent in front of Nicholasâs mom and the guests, always quick with a compliment or a laugh. But the moment their backs were turned, she shifted, snapping at the staff with thinly veiled disdain and issuing passive-aggressive commands like she was the queen of a castle that wasnât hers, at least not yet. Not for another few months.
âDo you really think that centerpiece works?â I overheard her ask Maria, her voice syrupy sweet but her eyes hard. âI mean, I guess itâs fine if weâre going for rustic, but I thought we were aiming for elegant. Maybe⊠try again?â
Maria nodded quickly, her cheeks flushing as she scrambled to adjust the arrangement. I wanted to say something, to call her out, but I knew better. Confrontation wouldnât end well â not with her. Instead, I bit my tongue, holding onto the simmering anger as I turned away.
Whenever Nicholas wasnât in the room, she barked orders like a drill sergeant, her tone sharp and impatient. But the moment he returned, she was all soft smiles and doe-eyed adoration. It was a performance, and I hated how good she was at it.
The mistreatment wasnât lost on Paolo or my mom either. Paolo shot me a glance as we passed through the dining room the next afternoon, his expression tight. âYour friend,â he said under his breath, the word âfriendâ dripping with sarcasm, âhas a real knack for making people feel small.â
âSheâs not my friend,â I replied, my tone sharper than intended. Paolo raised an eyebrow but didnât press the issue.
Maria, on the other hand, was less subtle. Later that evening, as we stood in the kitchen helping prepare dessert, she leaned close, her voice low. âThat woman,â she muttered, nodding toward the patio where Valerie was holding court with a group of guests, âis a nightmare. I canât believe Nicholas is marrying her.â
I didnât respond. I couldnât. Instead, I focused on slicing strawberries, the knife trembling slightly in my hand. My momâs sharp eyes didnât miss a thing.
Nicholas wasnât oblivious, either. I caught him watching her more than once, his jaw tightening and his gaze darkening as she dismissed a server or criticized one of the housekeepers. He didnât say anything, not directly, but the cracks in his façade were growing until he had enough.
The dining room was alive with conversation, the clinking of glasses and the low hum of laughter filling the space. I sat between Paolo and my mom, doing my best to focus on the meal and ignore the weight of Nicholasâs gaze from across the table. Valerie sat beside him, her hand resting possessively on his arm as she chatted animatedly with one of the other guests.
âSo, Paolo,â Valerie said suddenly, her voice cutting through the chatter like a blade. âItâs fascinating, really, how someone in your line of work can find time to travel so much. I mean, I suppose itâs easier when you donât have to worry about running a household.â The smile on her lips didnât reach her eyes, and the condescension in her tone was unmistakable.
Paolo, to his credit, remained calm. He leaned back in his chair, his expression polite but cool. âItâs all about balance,â he replied smoothly. âI imagine youâd know a lot about that, being so⊠involved in planning your upcoming nuptials.â
âBalance is key,â he said, his voice deceptively calm as he set his fork down. âOf course, it also helps to treat the people around you with a little respect. Makes things run a lot smoother.â
Valerie blinked, her smile faltering for a split second before she recovered. âOh, definitely,â she said, her tone overly sweet. âI was just saying how impressive Paoloâs schedule must be. Itâs really a compliment.â
Nicholasâs gaze didnât waver. âIt didnât sound like one.â
The tension at the table was palpable, the other guests suddenly finding excuses to excuse themselves. My mom gave me a knowing look as she stood, her arm brushing Paoloâs. âLetâs grab some coffee in the lounge,â she said brightly, her tone masking the awkwardness in the air. Paolo nodded, rising to follow her and the others out of the room.
I lingered, my heart pounding as I saw Nicholas lean back in his chair, his dark eyes fixed on Valerie. I should have left, but something in his expression made me hesitate. I slipped into the hallway just outside the dining room, pressing myself against the wall as I strained to hear their conversation.
âI donât know what that was about,â Valerie said, her voice sharp now that the audience was gone. âYou didnât have to embarrass me like that.â
âI didnât embarrass you,â Nicholas replied evenly. âYou did that yourself.â
There was a pause, and I could imagine her bristling, her perfectly manicured nails digging into the tablecloth. âExcuse me?â
Nicholasâs tone was calm, but there was an edge to it that sent a shiver down my spine. âYou think I donât notice the way you talk to people? The way you treat them like theyâre beneath you?â
âI donâtââ she started, but he cut her off.
âYou do,â he said firmly. âAnd Iâm sick of it. This isnât the first time, and itâs not going to keep happening.â
Her voice dropped, sharp and cold. âWhat are you trying to say?â
He didnât hesitate. âIâm saying you need to start treating people with respect, Valerie.â
Silence stretched between them, heavy and suffocating. I held my breath, my pulse racing as I waited for her response.
When she finally spoke, her voice was low and tight with barely contained anger. âI canât believe youâre taking their side. Youâre overreacting,â she snapped. âI was just making conversation.â
âNo, you were making digs,â he said sharply. âAnd youâve been doing it since we got here.â
I pressed my hand to my chest, my heart pounding as the truth in his words settled over me. I shouldnât have been listening, but I couldnât tear myself away.
âIâm not the problem here,â Valerie hissed. âYouâre the one whoâs been acting different. Distant. Do you think I havenât noticed?â
Nicholas exhaled sharply, the scrape of his chair audible as he leaned back. âIâve been distant because I canât keep pretending like everythingâs fine when itâs not.â
My breath caught at the bluntness in his tone. I edged closer to the doorway, my pulse pounding as I waited for her response.
Valerie didnât miss a beat. âFine? You think Iâm the problem here?â Her voice was sharp but edged with something calculated. âNicholas, youâve been distracted since the moment we arrived. And donât think I havenât noticed the way your eyes wander.â
There was a pause, heavy with implication. Nicholas didnât respond immediately, and when he finally did, his voice was low but filled with quiet anger. âDonât try to twist this.â
âIâm not twisting anything,â she said quickly, her voice softening as if sheâd just realized sheâd pushed too far. âLook, I know the last few months have been⊠stressful. Planning the wedding, keeping up appearancesâitâs a lot. And maybe I havenât been as understanding as I should be.â
Her tone shifted, adopting an air of vulnerability. It was a performance, but an effective one. âBut thatâs no excuse to start attacking me at the dinner table. You humiliated me, Nicholas. In front of your family.â
Nicholas sighed, the sound heavy with frustration. âYouâre not the victim here, Valerie. Iâm not going to sit back and let you talk to people like theyâre beneath you.â
âI wasnât!â she snapped, but then caught herself. Her next words came softer, more measured. âMaybe it came off wrong. I was just trying to make conversation, Nic. I didnât mean anything by it.â
The air shifted, her tone almost pleading now. âI know I can be⊠abrasive sometimes. Itâs just the pressure, you know? I want everything to be perfect for us, for the wedding, for your family. Iâm trying, Nic. I really am.â
She reached across the table, and I could practically hear the sound of her hand resting on his. âI need you to believe that. To believe in us.â
My chest tightened, a familiar pang of jealousy mingling with anger as I listened to her carefully crafted words. She was diffusing the situation, steering it back under her control, and Nicholas was letting her.
âI donât know if I believe it anymore,â he said finally, his voice quiet but firm.
Her breath hitched audibly, and I could feel the weight of the silence that followed. Then, she let out a soft, shaky laugh. âYou donât mean that,â she said, her voice trembling just enough to sound sincere. âYouâre tired, Nic. And overwhelmed. We both are.â
âI mean it,â Nicholas said, his tone unwavering. âI donât want to keep pretending.â
Valerie didnât respond immediately, and when she did, her voice was calm, almost too calm. âDo you really think now is the time to be having this conversation? With your family here? With everyone watching us?â
Nicholas let out a frustrated sigh, but she pressed on. âI get it, Nic. I do. But this isnât just about us anymore. Thereâs the baby to think about. Our future.â
I heard Nicholasâs chair scrape against the floor as he stood, the tension in the room thick enough to choke on. His footsteps echoed as he walked away, and I barely had time to duck further into the hallway before he passed by. His expression was dark, his jaw tight, but he didnât see me.
And he mightâve not seen me then, he sure as hell saw me whenever his eyes werenât on Valerie.
Every stolen glance, every brush of his hand against mine when no one was looking, sent a jolt through me. He found excuses to slip away from the group, and I wasnât far behind. It was reckless, dangerous, and impossible to resist.
The first rendezvous after our pool house tryst happened after the dinner incident. I was helping Maria set up the dessert table in the garden. Nicholas appeared out of nowhere, his presence like a storm cloud rolling in.
â(Y/N),â he said quietly, his tone a warning and a plea all at once. Maria glanced between us, her brows knitting in confusion before excusing herself with a polite nod. She left me alone with him, the space suddenly too small despite the open air.
âYes, Nicholas? Do you need something?â I whispered, my voice sharp as I adjusted a platter of macarons, careful to meet his gaze even though I knew there was nobody around. Though, I was hyper aware of the windows of the house, especially the ones on the second floor, which basically had a front row and unobstructed view of the backyard as opposed to the first floor windows covered in bushes and climbing vines.
âYou,â he replied simply, the weight of the word making my hands tremble. I felt him step closer, the heat of his body radiating against my back.
I stiffened, gripping the base of the macaron tower as my eyes flicked up to the second floor, my heart skipping a beat as I caught sight of a shadow passing by one of the second-floor windows. I turned my back to him, walking to the end of the table to fix the tablecloth, âSecond floor, left corner window,â I whispered.
Nicholas stilled, his gaze snapping upward in the direction I indicated. He lingered just long enough to catch the subtle movement of the shadow, then turned his head slightly, pretending to admire the flowers lining the garden path.
âWere you always this observant?â he asked, his voice low and steady as he walked toward the far end of the table, keeping his posture casual but a smirk played on the corner of his mouth.
I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye, my fingers adjusting the edges of a napkin as though I cared deeply about the tableâs presentation. âI had to learn if I was gonna sneak around with you all those years ago,â I teased.
Nicholas chuckled softly, his voice low enough that it wouldnât carry to the house. âYou always were good at keeping me on my toes,â he murmured, his dark eyes catching mine briefly before flicking back to the shadow in the window. âBut youâre even better now. More confident.â
I rolled my eyes, keeping my hands busy with a basket of utensils. âConfidence comes with age,â I replied lightly, though my heart raced under his gaze. âUnlike some people, I actually grew up.â
He grinned, a flash of white teeth against his sun-kissed skin. âIn more ways than one.â His voice dropped to a whisper, full of teasing heat, as he leaned just close enough that only I could hear.
I nearly dropped the basket, my cheeks heating as I turned my back to him again, pretending to fix the tablecloth. âOh, my god. You really just said that,â I muttered, though the faint smile tugging at my lips betrayed me.
Nicholas chuckled, the sound low and full of mischief, but I could feel the tension radiating off him as he glanced toward the window again. âIâm just being honest, baby,â he murmured, stepping closer but keeping his distance just enough to avoid suspicion. âMeet me in the pool house in ten minutes,â he whispered.
I hesitated, my pulse quickening at his words. I wanted to say no, to remind him of the risks, but the weight of his dark, steady gaze made it impossible to resist. Every nerve in my body hummed with the memory of his hands on me, his lips tracing lines of fire against my skin.
Without looking at him, I adjusted a fork in the basket, my voice barely a whisper. âYouâre insane.â
âIâm desperate,â he countered, his voice low and rough. âTen minutes.â
Before I could respond, he stepped away, his posture casual as he walked back toward the house. From an outsiderâs perspective, it looked as if heâd merely stopped to check on the dessert setup. But the brush of his fingers against mine as he passed sent a jolt through me, a silent promise of what was to come.
I exhaled slowly, gripping the edge of the table to steady myself. The faint movement in the second-floor window was gone, and I prayed whoever had been watching had lost interest. My heart raced as I glanced at the house, the hum of conversation and laughter drifting through the open doors.
Was this worth the risk? Of course it wasnât. But that hadnât stopped me before, especially not the other night. Though, to be fair, I was drunk. Iâm not sure what excuse I could possibly have now.
After an excruciating ten minutes of debating whether to listen to Nicholas, I excused myself from Maria with a lame reason about needing to check on something. She barely glanced up from the desserts, too preoccupied with arranging the delicate tower of profiteroles to question me. I slipped further into the garden, navigating around the paths of perfectly trimmed bushes, my footsteps light against the stone path as I passed the pool and made my way to the pool house.
The pool house door creaked slightly as I pushed it open, my heart pounding in my chest. The space was dimly lit, the faint glow of indirect light filtering through the windows and casting long shadows across the room. I closed the door behind me, my breath hitching as I turned to find Nicholas already waiting.
He was leaning against the wall, his hands shoved into the pockets of his slacks, his tie loosened and the top buttons of his shirt undone. His dark eyes locked onto mine the moment I stepped inside, the tension between us crackling like a live wire.
âYouâre late,â he murmured, his voice low and rough, sending a shiver down my spine.
âYou said ten minutes,â I replied, my tone sharper than I intended as I stepped closer. âI waited exactly that long.â
Nicholas pushed off the wall, closing the distance between us in two quick strides. He stopped just in front of me, his towering frame casting a shadow over mine as his dark eyes searched my face. âYou drive me fucking crazy, you know that?â he said, his voice barely above a whisper.
âYou told me once,â I shot back, my voice trembling slightly as I held his gaze.
He smirked, his hands reaching out to grip my hips and pull me closer. âI mean it,â he murmured, his breath warm against my cheek. âEvery time I see you, every second I canât touch youâitâs killing me.â
âNic,â I started, but he cut me off, his lips crashing into mine with a desperation that made my knees weak. His hands slid up my sides, his fingers brushing against the bare skin beneath my blouse as he pulled me closer, his body pressing against mine.
I melted into him, my hands fisting in his shirt as his mouth claimed mine, hot and demanding. The taste of him, the feel of him, the sheer intensity of his presence â it was intoxicating. I hated how much I wanted him, how easily he could unravel me with just a look, a touch.
âThis is insane,â I murmured against his lips, my voice trembling as he kissed his way down my neck, his teeth grazing the sensitive skin there.
âI donât care,â Nicholas growled, his hands gripping my waist as he backed me toward the couch. âI need you.â
I gasped as the backs of my knees hit the edge of the couch, my body sinking into the cushions as he followed, his weight pressing me down. His lips found mine again, his hands working quickly to unbutton my blouse, his movements rough and desperate.
âWe shouldnât,â I whispered, even as my fingers moved to loosen his tie, my body arching into his.
âWe wonât get caught,â he promised, his voice low and full of heat as he quickly ripped his shirt off and let it fall to the floor. His lips brushed against my ear, his breath sending shivers down my spine. âIâll make it quick.â
I laughed softly, the sound breathless and tinged with disbelief. âYouâre unbelievable.â
âYou love it,â he shot back, his dark eyes gleaming with mischief as he leaned down to kiss me again, his hands sliding beneath my skirt.
And God help me, he wasnât wrong.
Other times, we wouldnât have sex. Yes, we would sneak a kiss here and there, but weâd also find ourselves just enjoying the otherâs company and getting to know each other again.
Late one afternoon, after most of the guests had gone off for a wine tasting tour, Nicholas and I found ourselves alone in the garden. It wasnât planned â or at least, it wasnât planned on my part. Iâd been rearranging the floral arrangements along the fountain when his voice startled me.
âStill playing florist?â he teased, leaning against the wrought-iron gate with his hands in his pockets, the sunlight casting a golden glow on his sharp features. He was devastatingly casual, his shirt rolled up to his elbows and his dark eyes fixed on me like I was the only thing that mattered.
I straightened, forcing myself to meet his gaze, shrugging my shoulders. âYou know how much I love details.â
He smirked, pushing off the gate and strolling toward me, his every movement fluid and purposeful. âThatâs one of the things I always loved about you,â he said, his voice low but warm. âYou notice the things most people overlook.â
I rolled my eyes, turning back to the arrangement in front of me. âCareful, Nicholas. Someone might think youâre flirting.â
He chuckled, the sound deep and familiar, sending a shiver down my spine. âMaybe I am,â he admitted, stopping a few feet away. He tilted his head, watching me carefully as I adjusted the flowers. âWhy did you even come back to work here? Last I heard you were off working at some big office.â
I froze for a moment, my fingers hovering over the delicate white roses as his question hung in the air. Finally, I sighed, my shoulders dropping as I adjusted the petals of the centerpiece. âIt was an unpaid internship, and it looked like it wasnât going anywhere. So I thought about going back to school to get my masterâs, but I canât do that without a paying job, now can I?â I asked with a smile.
Nicholas nodded slowly, his gaze softening as he stepped closer, his hands sliding into his pockets. âMakes sense,â he murmured, his voice quiet. âBut this place⊠doesnât it feel like going backward? You always said you wanted to do bigger things.â
I shrugged, forcing a nonchalant smile as I busied myself with the flowers again. âOne step forward, two steps back.â
Nicholas tilted his head, studying me with an intensity that made my heart skip a beat. âThat doesnât sound like you,â he said quietly. âYouâre not the kind of person who settles for less than what you want.â
I laughed softly, though it lacked any real humor. âSometimes life doesnât give you much of a choice, Nic. You should know that by now,â I cocked an eyebrow, trying to insert a tinge of teasing behind my words to lighten the mood.
He frowned, stepping closer until he was standing beside me, his presence warm and overwhelming. âSo what do you want, then?â he asked, his voice low and serious. âWhat would make you happy?â
I hesitated, my hands stilling over the arrangement. His question lingered in the air between us, heavier than the summer heat. I could feel his gaze on me, piercing and unrelenting, demanding an answer I wasnât sure I could give.
What did I want? What would make me happy?
The truth was complicated, tangled in the years weâd spent apart, in the choices weâd both made, in the reality of who we were now. And yet, standing there with him so close, the answer felt heartbreakingly simple, but I couldnât tell him the truth.
I turned to him slowly, meeting his dark, searching eyes. But then, I smiled slowly, âIâll let you know.â
Nicholas threw his head back in defeat, a smile growing on his face. âYou always were good at keeping me on edge,â he murmured, his voice a low rumble that sent a shiver down my spine.
I shrugged, turning back to the flowers. âKeeps things interesting,â I replied, plucking a stray leaf from the arrangement and tucking it into my apron pocket. The sunlight filtered through the garden, casting dappled shadows on the path between us, but the air felt charged, humming with unspoken words.
Every touch, every stolen moment, every secret conversation felt like a rebellion against the world around us. It was wrong, so wrong, and yet I couldnât bring myself to stop. Not when he looked at me like I was the only thing that mattered. Not when his touch set my skin on fire.
It became a pattern. Nicholas found me whenever he could â in the garden, in the hallway, even once in the pantry when I was restocking supplies. Each time, he kissed me like he was starving, his hands greedy and demanding as though he was trying to remember every inch of me. Or asking me about what I had been up to since I last saw him all those years ago, as if he wanted to get to know the girl that had escaped his grasp and make up for lost time.
And I let him.
I let him because I was angry.
Angry at Valerie for the way she treated everyone around her, for the way she manipulated Nicholas with her lies and her performance of the perfect fiancĂ©e. I told myself it was revenge, that every touch, every kiss, every stolen glance or word was a way of reclaiming some small part of my dignity, that she couldnât scare me into submitting to her. Angry at the universe for ever separating Nicholas and I in the first place. But most of all, I was angry at myself â for still wanting him, for letting him back in so easily, for pretending I could walk away unscathed when I knew better.
Nicholas wasnât just my past. He wasnât just somebody I could brush off and forget. He was in my blood, in my bones, in every broken piece of me that still remembered how it felt to love him like I was still that wide-eyed 18-year-old. And no matter how much I tried to deny it, I wasnât strong enough to resist him.
I hated the person I was becoming. I had never imagined being the other woman, never thought I could be someone who existed in the shadows, taking stolen moments and pretending they were enough. But I couldnât stop. Not when Nicholas whispered my name. Not when he looked at me with that raw vulnerability that made my heart ache. Not when his touch felt like the only thing keeping me from falling apart.
I was in too deep, and there was no way out.
One day, I was in the kitchen, wiping down the counters as the smell of fresh coffee filled the air. My mom was nearby, chatting softly with Paolo about the menu for the day, and the house was just starting to stir with the faint sounds of life.
Thatâs when I heard it â a voice. Hers.
I paused mid-wipe, my ears pricking at the sound of Valerieâs voice drifting from the adjoining hallway. She was speaking low, but there was an urgency to her tone that made me still.
ââcanât keep pushing this off,â she hissed, her words clipped. âI told you Iâd handle it. Just give me more time.â
I froze, my heart racing as I glanced toward the kitchen door. She was on the phone, and she wasnât trying to be overheard, but her voice carried just enough that I could pick out the words.
âI know itâs risky,â she continued, her voice sharp. âBut I donât have another option right now. Heâs suspicious as it is.â
Suspicious? My stomach twisted as I stepped closer to the door, careful not to make a sound. She was pacing, her heels clicking softly against the floor as she spoke.
âBecause itâs not that simple!â she snapped, her voice rising slightly before she caught herself. âDo you think I want to be in this position? Heâs expecting a baby, and Iââ She broke off abruptly, her breath hitching audibly.
The blood drained from my face as her words settled over me. Oh my God.
âBut Iâm not pregnant,â she said, her voice dropping to a whisper, raw with frustration. âNot yet.â
I gripped the edge of the counter, my knuckles white as I tried to process what Iâd just heard. Not pregnant. Not yet. She was lying to him â about everything.
My chest tightened, and I took a step back, the tile cool against my bare feet as I tried to catch my breath. The image of her drinking the mimosa, the wine, her tendency to wear very loose clothes to hide a belly that wasnât really growing flashed through my mind, and suddenly, it all made sense. The evasiveness, the secrecy, the drinking â it was all a façade.
Before I could think better of it, I stepped into the hallway, my voice trembling but firm. âYouâre not pregnant?â
Valerie spun around, her eyes wide with shock and then narrowing into something colder. She ended the call with a sharp tap on her phone, slipping it into her pocket as she straightened her posture. âWhat are you doing here?â she asked, her tone icy.
âYouâre not pregnant, are you?â I asked, my voice steadier.
She tilted her head, her lips curving into a tight, forced smile. âThatâs none of your concern.â
âIt is my concern,â I shot back, anger bubbling to the surface. âYouâve been lying to Nicholas, to everybody. And last weekââ I took a step closer, my voice rising. âOh, my god; it makes so much fucking sense.â
Her expression faltered for a fraction of a second before she composed herself, stepping toward me with calculated grace. âListen carefully,â she said, her voice low and venomous. âYou donât know what youâre talking about. And I suggest you keep your fucking mouth shut.â
I stared at her, my hands trembling at my sides. I wasnât sure if it was because of anger or fear. âWhy are you lying to him?â
Her jaw tightened, and for a moment, I thought she might answer. But then her lips curled into a smirk, and she leaned in closer, her voice dripping with condescension. âIf you think for one second that Iâll let a housemaid ruin everything Iâve worked for, youâre even dumber than you look.â
My heart pounded, but I held my ground. âIs that what this is about? Baby trapping Nicholas so he can marry you?â
Valerie let out a low, humorless laugh, her eyes gleaming with something darker as she stepped even closer, her perfume sharp and overwhelming. âI prefer to think of it as securing my future. Nicholas is my future.â
I clenched my fists at my sides, my nails digging into my palms as I stared at her, my chest heaving. âHeâs not your future if itâs built on lies. Youâre playing with peopleâs lives â his, his familyâs, your own. Do you even care about him?â
Her smile faltered, and for the briefest moment, I thought I saw a flicker of something real â fear, maybe, or guilt â but it was gone in an instant, replaced by that same steely confidence. âOf course, I care,â she said smoothly, crossing her arms. âBut love doesnât pay the bills.â
Her words were like a slap, the cruelty of them making my stomach turn. âYou donât deserve him,â I said, my voice low but firm.Â
She laughed, studying me like I was some curious little animal she could squash under her heel. âAnd you do?â she asked, her tone sharp and cutting. âLet me save you the trouble, (Y/N) â If you so much as hint at what you think you know, I will make sure you and your mother are out of this house. Youâll lose everything. You want that masterâs degree, donât you? You want your mom to have job security?â
Her words hit me like a slap. She was threatening me, my family. I gulped at her threat. Knowing her, it wasnât idle. I mean, look at everything sheâs done so far to keep up her lie.
She straightened her posture, smoothing an imaginary wrinkle from her dress. âThis conversation is over,â she said coolly. âAnd if youâre smart, youâll stay away from Nicholas.â
I stared at her, my heart pounding in my chest as a wave of helplessness washed over me. She was lying to him, manipulating him, and there was nothing I could do to stop her â not without risking my future, my momâs job security.
I stayed rooted to the spot as she walked away, her heels clicking behind her. I stood there for a long moment, staring at the empty hallway where Valerie had disappeared. My chest was tight, anger and helplessness swirling together into a storm I couldnât contain. Every instinct screamed at me to run to Nicholas, to tell him everything Iâd just heard. But her words echoed in my head like a taunt.
Youâll lose everything.
I couldnât let that happen. Not to my mom. Not after everything sheâd done for me, after all the sacrifices sheâd made to give me the chance to build a better life, not when she fought for me to have this job again after I quit my internship. My hands clenched into fists at my sides as I forced myself to turn back toward the kitchen.
The moment I stepped through the door, my momâs gaze snapped to me, her brow furrowing in concern. Paolo, who was busy chopping vegetables, paused mid-motion and glanced up, his sharp eyes narrowing as he took me in.
âYou look like youâve seen a ghost,â my mom said, setting down the dish towel sheâd been holding. âAre you feeling okay?â
âIâm fine,â I said quickly, too quickly, the words tumbling out before I could think them through. I busied myself with grabbing a clean dish from the drying rack, avoiding their gazes. âJust needed some air.â
Paoloâs lips pressed into a thin line, his sharp intuition cutting through my flimsy excuse. âYouâre pale,â he said, his voice quieter now. âDid something happen?â
âNo,â I lied, forcing myself to smile as I turned to face them. âI just needed a break. Thatâs all.â
My mom didnât look convinced, but she didnât press the issue. âWell, sit down if you need to,â she said, her tone softening. âYouâve been working so hard lately.â
I nodded, grateful for the out, and sank into one of the kitchen chairs. My hands trembled slightly as I folded them in my lap, but I clenched them into fists, willing the shaking to stop.
Paolo, however, wasnât so easily swayed. He leaned against the counter, his sharp gaze fixed on me. âYou know,â he said, his tone casual but pointed, âsometimes the truth has a way of coming out, always.â
My stomach twisted, but I kept my expression neutral. âWhat are you talking about?â
Paolo shrugged, turning back to his cutting board with a nonchalant air. âJust saying.â
I swallowed hard, my mind racing. Did he know something about what happened just now? About whatâs been happening between me and Nicholas? Or was he just trying to get me to open up? Either way, I couldnât risk saying anything â not here, not now, not when my family was in jeopardy.
For the next few days, I kept my head down, doing everything I could to stay out of both Nicholasâs and Valerieâs paths. It wasnât easy. Nicholas was everywhereâlingering in the garden, passing through the kitchen, even showing up at the greenhouse where I sometimes retreated to arrange flowers. He always seemed to find me, his dark eyes filled with questions I wasnât ready to answer.
But I avoided him. I avoided everyone.
My mom noticed, of course. She wasnât the type to pry, but I could feel her watching me, her brow furrowed in quiet concern. Paolo, on the other hand, wasnât so subtle. He made little comments, dropped hints about secrets and truth, his sharp eyes cutting through every flimsy excuse I gave him.
And then there was Valerie.
She was everywhere, too, but for a different reason. It was like she could sense my hesitation, my fear, and she reveled in it. She was sharper than usual, her barbs aimed with precision at anyone who dared to cross her path. She was always smiling, but it never reached her eyes. When our gazes met across a room, her lips would curl into a smirk that made my stomach twist.
She knew she had me cornered, and she wanted me to remember it.
But the most unnerving thing was the shift between her and Nicholas. He was colder, distant. I noticed the way his jaw tightened when she touched his arm, the way he didnât lean into her kisses anymore. He didnât even pretend to laugh at her jokes. It was subtle, but it was there. A tension that simmered just beneath the surface. And then, one evening, it all came to a head.
I was in the library, organizing the collection of vintage books that hadnât been touched in years. The smell of leather and paper filled the air, the soft light from the desk lamp casting a warm glow over the room. I liked it there. It was quiet, out of the way â a place where I could breathe without feeling like the walls were closing in. But my peace didnât last long.
The door opened behind me, the sound of footsteps echoing against the hardwood floor. I froze, my hands stilling over the spine of an old copy of Pride and Prejudice. I didnât need to turn around to know who it was. His presence filled the room like a storm cloud, heavy and unrelenting.
â(Y/N).â
His voice was low, rough, and it sent a shiver down my spine. I forced myself to stay calm, to keep my hands steady as I slid the book back into place. âYes?â I asked, my voice soft as I turned around to face him.
Nicholas glanced over his shoulder and locked the door before crossing the room toward me in a quick few strides.
âWhat are you doing?â I asked, my voice sharper than I intended, though my heart pounded against my ribs.
He didnât answer immediately. Instead, Nicholas closed the distance between us until he stood just a foot away. His dark eyes burned with intensity, and the tension rolling off him was palpable. âYouâve been avoiding me,â he said finally, his voice low but firm.Â
I swallowed hard, gripping the edge of the bookshelf behind me as though it could anchor me. âI havenât been avoiding you,â I lied, my voice trembling slightly. âIâve just been⊠busy.â
âDonât bullshit me, (Y/N),â he snapped, his tone cutting through the quiet like a knife. âYou wonât look at me, you barely say a word when weâre in the same room, and now youâre hiding out in the library. What the hell is going on?â
My chest tightened, and I glanced away, unable to meet his gaze. âItâs nothing,â I said weakly, my voice barely above a whisper.
Nicholas reached out, his fingers brushing my chin as he tilted my face up, forcing me to look at him. âTalk to me, baby,â he murmured, his voice softer now but no less intense. He leaned in then, peppering my face in soft, tentative kisses, maybe hoping that his kisses might reassure me that I could talk to him, but I couldnât.
I jerked back slightly, shaking my head as my heart raced. âNic, stop,â I said, my voice breaking.
His brow furrowed, and the confusion in his dark eyes made my chest ache. I hesitated, my heart racing as I searched his face. He was everything I shouldnât want, everything I should have let go of years ago. But the truth was, I didnât want to let go. Our past few trysts were everything I wanted. But then, the image of Valerie flashed inside my mind. Her threats. That evil smile she only reserved for me.
I closed my eyes. âI need you to go back out there,â I whispered, the words slipping out before I could stop them.
Nicholas froze, his breath catching as he stared at me, his dark eyes searching mine like he was trying to make sense of my words. His hands were still on my face, his body pressed so close I could feel the rapid rise and fall of his chest.
âWhat?â he said, his voice barely above a whisper.
I swallowed hard, forcing myself to meet his gaze. âYou need to go back out there, Nic,â I said again, my voice trembling but resolute. âWe canât do this anymore,â I whispered as my gaze fell to the floor.
His jaw clenched, and for a moment, I thought he was going to argue, to push back the way he always did when he didnât get what he wanted. But then his shoulders sagged, and the fight seemed to drain out of him.
âWhy?â he asked, his voice cracking. âWhy the fuck are you pushing me away?â
I took a shaky breath, every nerve in my body screaming at me to say the truth, to tell him everything. But I couldnât. The weight of Valerieâs threat loomed over me, heavy and suffocating. My momâs face flashed in my mind, the way sheâd look if she lost everything because of me. I couldnât risk it.
âYou have a fiancĂ©e,â I said finally, my voice steadier than I felt. âThatâs whyââ
Nicholasâs jaw tightened, his dark eyes blazing with frustration. âDonât give me that. You know how I feel about you, (Y/N). I know how you feel about me, baby. What happened? What changed?â
âWhat we do⊠itâs not right,â I said, my hands trembling. âYouâre supposed to be marryingââ
âSheâs lying to me,â he interrupted, his voice rising. âFuck, I know she is. I donât know about what or why, but I know she is.â
I froze, my breath catching as his words sank in. His dark eyes bored into mine, searching for answers I couldnât give him. Of course, he caught my change in demeanor, he always did.
âIs that what this is about? (Y/N), do you know something? Did she say anything to you?â he asked, his voice softer now but no less intense.
I hesitated, my heart pounding as I weighed my options. I wanted to tell him the truth, to expose Valerie for the liar she was. But her threat hung over me like a guillotine, the weight of what I â my mom â stood to lose pressing down on my chest.
âNo,â I whispered finally, my voice breaking.
Nicholasâs expression darkened, his jaw tightening as he stepped back slightly, studying me with a mixture of frustration and disbelief. âDonât lie to me, (Y/N),â he said, his voice low and sharp. âYouâre not this good at hiding things â not from me.â
I wrapped my arms around myself, as if that could shield me from the intensity of his gaze. âIâm not lying,â I said quietly, but the tremor in my voice betrayed me.
His hands clenched into fists at his sides, and for a moment, he just stared at me, his dark eyes burning with unspoken words. Then he let out a sharp exhale, raking a hand through his hair. âSheâs gotten to you, hasnât she?â he asked, his voice softer now, laced with a mix of anger and pain. âWhat did she say?â
âShe didnât say anything,â I insisted. âI just⊠I canât do this anymore, Nic.â
Nicholas froze, his chest rising and falling as he tried to rein in his frustration. He stepped back, running a hand down his face before letting it fall to his side. âYou never give up easily, (Y/N). You promised me you wouldnât give up on us. Why are you doing this?â
I stared at him, my heart breaking under the weight of his plea. But I couldnât do it. I couldnât risk everything for a truth that might not even set us free.
âPlease, Nic,â I said, my voice trembling. âJust let it go, okay?â
Nicholas stared at me, his jaw tight, his eyes filled with a mix of hurt and frustration. For a moment, I thought he was going to argue, to push me for answers. But then he exhaled sharply, stepping back. His gaze lingered, his eyes filled with something I couldnât quite name, and for a moment, I saw the boy I used to know â the one who used to climb through my bedroom window or sneak me into his house and make me laugh until I couldnât breathe, the one who made me believe in love, even when it hurt.
âFine,â he said, his voice clipped. âIf thatâs how you want it.â
He turned and left without another word, the door clicking shut behind him. The silence that followed was deafening, and I sank into the nearest chair, my head in my hands as the tears finally spilled over.
I had done the right thing. The only thing I could do. But it didnât feel right. It felt like Iâd just lost him all over again.
I stayed there in the silence of the library for what felt like hours, staring blankly at the rows of untouched books. My tears had dried, leaving my cheeks stiff and my eyes sore, but the ache in my chest refused to let up. I had pushed him away, again, but this time it felt irreversible.
Eventually, the muffled hum of voices from the main living areas reminded me that I didnât have the luxury of hiding forever. I forced myself to stand, smoothing down my skirt and wiping my face as I stepped back into the hallway.
As I made my way toward the living room, my heart sank at the sound of familiar voices drifting toward me. Mrs. Chavez, with her warm, commanding tone, was deep in conversation with an event plannerâs crisp voice, discussing fabrics and color schemes. I considered turning around, but it was too late. They were right in my path.
When I entered, Mrs. Chavez glanced up first, her smile jovial, âOh, (Y/N)! Come look at the concepts for the gender reveal party Iâm throwing for Nicholas and Valerie,â she excitedly waved me over.
I hesitated for a moment, the words âgender reveal partyâ hanging heavy in the air. My feet felt like lead as I moved toward the table where Mrs. Chavez and the planner were seated. She gestured to the seat beside her, her smile warm and inviting, but I could feel my pulse quickening.
âItâs going to be beautiful,â Mrs. Chavez said, her voice brimming with excitement as she tapped on a sketch of a grand garden setup. âIâve already ordered the custom cake, and the florist is bringing in peonies next week.â
I nodded, my throat tight as I sat down. The sketches in front of me blurred together, my mind racing with the memory of Valerieâs words: âIâm not pregnant. Not yet.â
Mrs. Chavez studied me for a moment, her eyes softening. âYouâre usually so excited about parties,â she said gently, tilting her head. âIs everything okay?â
Just then, the planner stepped away, sensing the shift in the room. I forced a smile, nodding quickly. âIâm fine.â
She reached out, resting a hand on mine. âYouâve been working so hard. I canât tell you how much I appreciate everything you do.â
Her kindness was almost unbearable, the weight of her words pressing down on me like a stone. I swallowed hard, nodding again as I focused on the sketches in front of me.
âYou know,â Mrs. Chavez began, her tone thoughtful, âIâve always admired your strength, (Y/N). Even when you were a teenager, you had this quiet determination about you. Itâs one of the reasons I was so happy to have you back here.â
I glanced up at her, surprised by the shift in her tone. Her gaze was warm but piercing, as though she could see right through me.
âI used to thinkâŠâ She trailed off, her smile faint but knowing. âWell, letâs just say I wouldnât have been surprised if I mightâve been planning all of this for you in some other lifetime.â
Her words hit me like a tidal wave, the weight of her insinuation crashing over me. My stomach twisted as I struggled to keep my composure, my fingers gripping the edge of the table.
Mrs. Chavezâs smile remained gentle, her tone casual, but her eyes never left mine. âYou and Nicholas were always so close back then,â she continued, her voice light but deliberate.
My breath hitched, but I quickly masked it with a laugh that sounded too forced, even to my own ears. âNicholas wasâheâs always been kind to everyone,â I said, my voice shaking slightly.
She hummed thoughtfully, leaning back in her chair as if considering my words. âKind, yes,â she agreed. âBut with you, it was different. I thought it was sweet.â
I felt my heart hammering in my chest, my hands trembling as I tried to focus on the sketches in front of me. âThat was a long time ago,â I said quietly, avoiding her gaze.
She reached for her teacup, her movements graceful as ever. âYou know, (Y/N), itâs okay to hold onto feelings from the past. Sometimes, they never really leave us.â
My head snapped up at her words, my eyes wide with surprise. For a moment, I saw something in her expression â a flicker of understanding.
âI donât know what you mean,â I said quickly, the words tumbling out before I could stop them.
She smiled knowingly. âYouâre a terrible liar. You always were.â Her tone was gentle, but the weight of her words made it impossible to breathe.
âMrs. Chavez,â I started, my voice trembling. âIââ
She held up a hand, silencing me with a look that was both kind and firm. âListen to me, (Y/N),â she said, her voice softening. âWhatever is happening now â whatever has happened before â I want you to know that you are important to this family.â
Her words were like a lifeline I didnât know I needed, but they also left me feeling exposed, as though she could see every tangled thread of my life unraveling. I swallowed hard, my throat dry, and nodded, though I couldnât bring myself to meet her gaze.
âThank you,â I murmured, my voice barely above a whisper.
Mrs. Chavez leaned forward slightly, her hands folded neatly on the table as she studied me with an intensity that was both comforting and unnerving. âYouâre a good person, (Y/N),â she said softly.
Her words hit me like a tidal wave, the truth in them cutting through my carefully constructed walls. I wanted to tell her everything â about Valerieâs lies, her threats, and the unbearable weight of keeping it all inside. But the fear of what I stood to lose kept me silent.
âI donât know what to say,â I admitted, my voice trembling as I glanced down at the sketches, unable to look her in the eye.
She reached out, her fingers brushing against mine in a gesture of quiet support. âYou donât have to say anything,â she said gently.
The sincerity in her voice made my chest ache, and for the first time in days, I felt a flicker of hope â a small, fragile light breaking through the darkness. I nodded again, unable to trust my voice as a lump formed in my throat.
Mrs. Chavez smiled, her expression warm and understanding. âNow,â she said, her tone shifting back to its usual brightness, âhow about you go and take a breather, hm? Iâm gonna need you and your momâs opinions on balloons later.â
I nodded, managing a small smile despite the turmoil swirling inside me. âOf course, Mrs. Chavez. Thank you.â
Her eyes lingered on me for a moment longer, and I could see the unspoken concern in her gaze. But she didnât press. Instead, she reached for another sketch, her attention shifting back to the plans in front of her as she called the event planner back inside.
I stood, my legs feeling shaky as I pushed the chair back and stepped away from the table. The walls of the estate suddenly felt too close, the air too thick. I needed to get outside, to breathe, to clear my head.
The garden was quiet when I stepped outside, the hum of activity inside the house fading into the background. I walked aimlessly, my fingers brushing against the hedges as I tried to make sense of the chaos inside me. Mrs. Chavezâs words played on a loop in my mind, her knowing tone, her gentle reassurance.
She knew. Maybe not everything, but enough to suspect something wasnât right. And yet, instead of judgment, sheâd offered me compassion, a lifeline I hadnât expected.
I stopped by the fountain, the sound of trickling water soothing the storm in my chest. My reflection in the rippling surface looked foreign, my face pale and my eyes clouded with uncertainty. I clenched my fists at my sides, fighting the tears that threatened to spill over.
âPull it together,â I whispered to myself.
But as much as I tried to convince myself, the weight of the secrets I was carrying felt unbearable. Every moment I stayed silent, I felt like I was betraying not just Nicholas, but also Mrs. Chavez, my mom, and even myself.
I didnât know how long I stood there, lost in my thoughts, when a voice broke through the silence.
âShouldnât you be working?â
I turned sharply, my stomach dropping to my feet. Valerie stood there with her arms crossed, a smirk curling her lips. Her eyes gleamed with a cold satisfaction, as if sheâd caught me doing something I shouldnât.
I threw my head back and looked up at the sky, as if I was pleading the universe for mercy. How many heavy conversations could I have in one day? âWhat do you want, Valerie?â I asked, my voice sharp.
Valerie let out a soft, mocking laugh, as if she found my frustration amusing. âRelax, (Y/N). I just wanted to remind you how youâve been doing a pretty good job staying out of my way so far. Iâd hate to see you ruin that.â
I took a deep sigh, my shoulders slumping, âLook, Iâm not in the mood right now. I get it, okay? Iâll stay out of your way.â
Valerie tilted her head, her smirk widening as if she found my resignation amusing. âGood,â she said, her tone dripping with condescension.
My jaw clenched, anger bubbling beneath the surface, but I forced myself to keep my expression neutral. âIs that all?â I asked, my voice flat.
She pursed her lips in triumph. âFor now,â she said before turning on her heel and walking back into the house.
I watched her retreating figure until she disappeared through the tall French doors. My chest felt tight, like a rubber band stretched to its limit, ready to snap. My fists clenched involuntarily at my sides as the rage simmered beneath the surface, threatening to boil over.
I wasnât sure how much more of this I could take. Every word she spoke was another brick added to the wall I was building around myself, trapping me in a web of lies and threats. And yet, I couldnât seem to find a way out without everything crumbling around me.
The days leading up to the gender reveal party werenât any easier. Tension hung thick in the air, palpable enough to choke on. There were a few bumps in the party planning, so Mrs. Chavez was frazzled about the details, having to find a different florist and needing Paolo to take over for the catering company that dropped out of the event at the last possible moment.
I was avoiding Nicholas like the plague, or maybe he was avoiding me, too. I hadnât really talked to him since our conversation in the library, and if I did, it was polite and professional. Though, I could sense the hurt in his eyes every time I did. Valerie, on the other hand, seemed to thrive on the chaos. She floated through the house with an air of smug confidence, her voice carrying easily as she commanded staff and fussed over every detail of the party.
By the time the day of the party finally arrived, I was on full-on autopilot mode. My nerves were already frayed from days of walking on eggshells and dodging both Nicholas and Valerie, but I didnât want what had happened to affect my performance at work. So, I plastered on the most polite smile I could muster and got to helping set up for the party.
It was an hour before the allotted time on the invitation. The backyard was a flurry of activity as staff hurried to have everything ready before the first guests could arrive. Paolo and his team of hired underlings were all rushing to get the last of the desserts ready on time. Maria and I were in charge of helping set up all of the tables while the rest of the sub-contracted decorators were being overseen by my mom and the event planner Mrs. Chavez had hired.
So far, the backyard looked just about done. The extravagant pink and blue balloon archways and garland adorned every entryway and path leading guests toward the heart of the event. The main attraction was the centerpiece fountain, transformed into a cascading display of pink and blue hydrangeas, their soft petals spilling into the water like a fairytale come to life.
Strings of fairy lights were woven through the gardenâs trellises and wrapped around the ancient oaks, casting a warm, inviting glow as the sun began its slow descent. At the far end of the garden, a dessert table was the picture of decadence. Towering macaron pyramids in alternating hues of pink and blue flanked a massive tiered cake, the top tier covered in edible glitter and crowned with a gold question mark. Miniature cupcakes, chocolate-covered strawberries, and bite-sized Ă©clairs filled the table, their intricate designs reflecting the partyâs color scheme.
The smell of fresh blooms mixed with the tantalizing aroma of Paoloâs creations wafting from the catering station. His team was arranging trays of hors dâoeuvres on a smaller table nearby, each bite-sized piece meticulously plated with edible flowers and tiny garnishes.
Around the fountain, small tables were arranged in concentric circles, draped in crisp white linens with golden accents. Each table was adorned with glass vases holding sprays of babyâs breath and roses dyed in pastel shades of pink and blue. The soft notes of instrumental music drifted from hidden speakers, adding to the serene yet celebratory atmosphere.
Maria and I worked silently as we adjusted chairs and made last-minute tweaks to the arrangements, our movements quick and efficient. I paused to straighten the centerpiece on a table closest to the fountain, my fingers brushing against the delicate petals of a pink peony. Despite the beauty surrounding me, the tight knot in my chest refused to loosen. The party was perfect. The party was nothing more than a celebration of a lie.
Across the garden, I caught a glimpse of Nicholas speaking with his mother near the dessert table. He was dressed impeccably, his dark suit tailored to perfection, but his posture was tense, his hands stuffed into his pockets as Mrs. Chavez gestured animatedly. He nodded occasionally, his gaze flickering over the setup before landing on me.
Our eyes met for a fleeting moment as I walked past to make my way toward the kitchen and check on Paolo, and I quickly looked away focusing on my strides, but Mrs. Chavez called out to me. â(Y/N)!â
Nicholasâs gaze awkwardly shifted away as I made my way over to them.
â(Y/N), can you check on the pedestals near the canopy and make sure none of them are easy to knock over?â She asked with a smile. I was about to nod my head and turn to do what she said but she stopped me, âWait.â She turned her attention to Nicholas, âSweetie, is Valerie almost back from her nail appointment? Did you ever get that ultrasound from her so we can put it up on the slideshow?â
Nicholas pulled out his phone from his pocket, âShe should be on her way. Valerie said sheâd call her doctor before she left, but I can call and ask if they sent it over to her. I think I have the doctorâs name somewhere,â he said as he scrolled away on his phone, tapping something, and bringing the phone up to his ear before making his way back inside the house.
Mrs. Chavez turned back to me, âCheck the pedestals please.â
I nodded quickly and hurried away, relieved to have a reason to distance myself from Nicholas. As I walked toward the canopy, the tension in my chest only grew tighter. My hands were trembling as I reached the first pedestal, giving it a slight nudge to ensure it was steady. I did the same for the next. The next. And the next.
Some minutes later, Maria joined me, a smile on her face. âThe decorations are so pretty, arenât they?â
I let out a breathy laugh, âIâm more focused on making sure Paolo saves us some leftovers to take home.â
She laughed heartily. âYou know he will. These people always prefer the drinks to the food.â Mariaâs laughter was a small reprieve, her warm energy cutting through the tension that had been suffocating me all day.
I nodded, trying to match her lightness, even as the weight of everything threatened to pull me under. âGood,â I said, forcing a smile. âIâm staking my claim on those macarons.â
âSmart,â Maria teased. âBut donât let Paolo catch you sneaking them early. Heâs in full perfectionist mode right now.â
I chuckled softly, grateful for the distraction as we continued adjusting the pedestals. For a moment, it felt almost normal â like we were just two coworkers prepping for another lavish party. But then, the distant sound of a raised voice shattered the illusion.
ââŠin the actual fuck are you talking about?!â
My heart stopped. Nicholasâs voice, sharp and unmistakable, carried across the garden. I exchanged a worried glance with Maria, who had frozen mid-reach toward a floral arrangement. We both turned around and saw Nicholas stomping out into the backyard with Valerie following closely behind, her white dress flapping in the air.
Nicholasâs expression was thunderous, his jaw clenched so tightly it looked as if he might crack a tooth. âValerie, stop lying to me!â he shouted, his voice booming over the chatter of the staff setting up.
Heads turned, tools paused mid-air, and the garden fell eerily silent except for the sharp clip of Valerieâs heels as she tried to keep up with him and the sound of the soft instrumental music, which was quickly deafened by somebody pausing the music from the DJ booth.
âNicholas, please!â she called after him, her voice desperate but still laced with that performative sweetness that grated on my nerves. âCan we talk about this inside?â
âNo, weâre talking about it now,â he snapped, spinning around to face her. His dark eyes burned with anger as he gestured around the lavish setup. âYou expect me to stand here and smile for a fucking gender reveal when youâre not even fucking pregnant? Are you out of your goddamn mind?â
Gasps rippled through the staff, whispers breaking out like wildfire. I felt my stomach drop as Valerie froze, her face draining of color before twisting into something uglier â rage and fear warring beneath her perfect façade.
âNicholas,â she hissed, her tone sharp and low as her eyes darted around at the onlookers. âYouâre making a scene.â
âIâm the one making a scene?â Nicholas shot back, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
Valerie straightened her posture, her mask slipping back into place as she tried to regain control. âWhereâs this even coming from, Nic?â
Nicholas let out a sharp laugh, the sound devoid of humor. âI called your OB/GYN to ask about the ultrasound. They didnât even know who the fuck I was talking about!â His voice cracked on the last word, the raw betrayal evident in his tone.
Valerieâs eyes widened for a fraction of a second before she quickly composed herself, adopting an air of indignant disbelief. âYou mustâve called the wrong office orââ
âCut the bullshit, Valerie!â Nicholas roared, his voice booming and echoing off the garden walls. His fists clenched at his sides as he took a step closer, his dark eyes blazing. âYouâre not fucking pregnant. You let my family do all of this shit for you over a fucking lie!â
The staff froze, their eyes darting between Nicholas and Valerie, the tension so thick it was suffocating. Maria tugged lightly on my arm, silently urging me to step back, but I was rooted to the spot, my pulse thundering in my ears.
Valerie faltered, her perfect composure slipping as her gaze flickered toward the staring crowd. Then, like a cornered animal, she turned the blame outward. âYou want to talk about lies?â she spat, her voice trembling as she pointed an accusatory finger in my direction. âAsk her!â
I froze, my breath catching as every eye turned toward me. Nicholasâs gaze snapped to mine, his expression a storm of anger and confusion.
âWhat the fuck is she talking about?â he demanded, his voice low and dangerous.
âIââ My throat tightened, my words choking on the sheer weight of the moment.
Valerie pressed on, sensing her opportunity. â(Y/N) knew and didnât say anything,â she continued, her voice gaining strength. Valerie sneered, turning her venomous glare toward me. âSheâs known for days, Nicholas. Ask her why she kept her mouth shut.â
Nicholasâs gaze burned into me, a mix of anger and betrayal flashing in his dark eyes. â(Y/N), tell me what sheâs talking about.â His voice was tight, barely controlled, but his tone cut through me like a knife.
The air around me felt suffocating, my chest tightening as Nicholasâs eyes bore into mine. Everyone was watching â Maria, the staff, even Paolo who had stepped out of the kitchen with a tray of hors dâoeuvres, his sharp gaze fixed on the unfolding chaos. I opened my mouth, but the words caught in my throat. From behind Nicholas and Valerie, I could see my mom and Mrs. Chavez embracing each other and clutching at their necklaces as they watched everything unfold.
âShe threatened me,â I finally choked out, my voice trembling but clear enough to cut through the silence. âShe said sheâd have my mom and I fired if I said anything⊠if I stayed near you.â
Nicholasâs expression shifted instantly, his jaw tightening as a muscle in his cheek twitched. He turned his fiery gaze back to Valerie, his voice low and seething. âYou threatened her?â
Valerie flinched but quickly recovered, shaking her head as her voice took on a pleading tone. âNic, listenââ
âNo! Donât âNicâ me,â he growled, stepping closer to her. âYou lied about a pregnancy, manipulated my family, and now youâre fucking threatening (Y/N) to keep your dirty little secret? What the fuck is wrong with you?â
Tears welled in Valerieâs eyes as she glanced around, her gaze darting to the stunned faces of the staff. âI didnât mean for it to get this far,â she said, her voice breaking. âI was scared, okay? You were going to break up with me, and IâI didnât know what else to do.â
Nicholas laughed, a hollow, bitter sound. âSo your solution was to fake a fucking baby? To trap me?â
Valerie clenched her fists at her sides, her perfect composure cracking under the weight of his rage. âYou were going to leave me!â she shouted, her voice trembling as tears streamed down her cheeks. âI could feel it. You were slipping away, and Iââ She faltered, taking a shaky breath before continuing. âI love you, Nicholas.â
âWell, I never fucking loved you!â Nicholas spat, his voice like a whip.
The words hung in the air like a bomb, silencing even the faint whispers of the staff. Everyone froze, the weight of Nicholasâs confession crashing down like thunder. Valerie staggered back a step as if heâd physically struck her, her face pale and tear-streaked.
âWhat?â she whispered, her voice trembling, her bravado crumbling into raw, exposed pain.
Nicholasâs jaw tightened, his dark eyes cold and unyielding as he took a deliberate step toward her. âYou heard me,â he said, his tone low and cutting. âI. Never. Loved. You. Thisââ he gestured between them with an almost violent motionââwas over a long fucking time ago.â
Valerie let out a choked sob, her carefully crafted image shattering in real-time. She reached for him, desperation etched across her face. âIâI just wanted to keep you, Nic. You donât understand. I owe money. Iââ
âI donât give a shit about your excuses,â Nicholas snapped, stepping back out of her reach. âYou donât get to manipulate me or the people I care about. That's disgusting.â
Her face twisted with anger, the tears on her cheeks glistening in the sunlight. âAnd what about you, huh? Donât think I didnât know what was happening,â she spat, spinning around and pointing at me again. âYou donât think itâs disgusting that you were fucking the maid while you still thought I was pregnant?â
Nicholas froze, his body going rigid as the words left Valerieâs mouth. The crowd of staff that had gathered to watch the spectacle collectively held their breath, the air crackling with tension. My heart plummeted, the blood draining from my face as every set of eyes turned to me once more.
Just then, I felt Mariaâs hand wrap around mine. Her grip was the only thing tethering me to reality, her presence a small but steady reminder that I wasnât completely alone in this humiliating nightmare. My throat was dry, my chest tight as I fought to find the words â any words â that could possibly defuse the bomb Valerie had just dropped.
Nicholasâs gaze snapped to her, his eyes blazing with unrestrained fury. âWhat the fuck did you just say?â His voice was low and dangerous, the kind that made even the boldest person think twice.
âYou heard me,â Valerie spat, her lips curling into a venomous smile despite the tears streaking her face. âYou think youâre so fucking righteous, Nic, but youâre just as bad as I am. Fucking the help while I was here, pretending to build a life with you?â
Nicholas took a slow step toward her, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. His entire body radiated fury, the kind that felt like it might explode at any second. âDonât you fucking dare talk about her like that,â he said, his voice a deadly calm that made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up.
âOh, please,â Valerie sneered, taking a step back but refusing to back down completely. âShe knew exactly what she was doing.â
âThatâs enough,â Nicholas growled, his voice rising as his self-control started to slip. âYouâre not fucking dragging her into this because you canât handle the fact that youâre a manipulative, lying piece of shit.â
Valerie laughed bitterly, her mascara smudging as the tears continued to flow. âOh, so now youâre defending her? After everything? God, youâre fucking unbelievable.â
Nicholas closed the gap between them, his face inches from hers. âYouâre done,â he said coldly. âPack your shit and get the fuck out of my house.â
Valerieâs face twisted in rage, her tear-streaked cheeks flushed with anger. âYou donât get to just kick me out like that!â she shouted, her voice cracking. âIâve been here for you through everything, Nicholas! Your career, your fucking family dramaââ
Nicholasâs laugh was cold, sharp as a blade. âSpare me the goddamn speech. You didnât give a fuck about me. Now, get the fuck out before I call the police.â
Valerie blinked, her bravado faltering for the first time. âYou donât mean that,â she whispered, her voice trembling. âYou wouldnâtââ
âTry me,â Nicholas interrupted, his voice low and lethal. His dark eyes were unyielding, daring her to push him further.Â
The silence that followed was deafening. Even the sound of the breeze rustling through the garden seemed to fade as everyone watched the scene unfold. Valerie stood frozen, her hands trembling as they instinctively moved toward the massive diamond ring on her finger.
Her face crumpled, a sob escaping her lips as she fumbled to pull the ring from her finger. It slipped off easily, catching the evening sunlight as she held it out to him with trembling hands.
Nicholas didnât even glance at it. âKeep it. Pawn it. I donât give a shit. Just get the fuck out.â
Her hand dropped to her side, the ring clenched tightly in her fist as tears streamed down her cheeks. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came. Finally, with a trembling breath, she turned and stalked toward the house, her heels clicking against the stone path like gunshots in the heavy silence.
Nicholas watched her retreating figure, his chest heaving as he tried to rein in his emotions. The tension in his shoulders was palpable, his fists still clenched at his sides. When she disappeared through the doors, he turned, his dark eyes immediately finding mine.
My stomach twisted as his gaze bore into me, an unspoken storm of emotions swirling in his expressionâanger, frustration, hurt. He took a step toward me, and I instinctively stepped back, my breath hitching. Maria quickly squeezed my hand then before leaving my side and joining Paolo outside the kitchen door.
âNicholas, Iââ
âDonât,â he said sharply, his voice cutting through the thick air like a knife. He ran a hand through his hair, letting out a bitter laugh as he paced a few steps away before turning back to face me. âI asked you point-blank if you knew anything. You fucking knew this whole time, and you didnât tell me.â
My breath hitched as I met his gaze, the weight of his anger like a physical blow. âIâI wanted to,â I stammered, my voice shaking. âBut sheââ
âThreatened you,â he finished, his voice dripping with disdain. âI heard that the first time. But so what? That was enough to stop you? After everything weâve been through, (Y/N), you didnât think you could trust me enough to tell me the fucking truth?â
His words hit me like a slap, and I felt my eyes sting with tears. âIt wasnât just about me,â I said, my voice breaking. âShe threatened my mom, Nic. Her job â everything.â
Nicholasâs jaw clenched, and he looked away, his hands on his hips as he took a deep, shaky breath. âYou shouldâve come to me,â he said finally, his voice quieter but no less strained. âI couldâve protected you.â
âI didnât want to put you in that position,â I said softly, my voice trembling. âAnd I didnât want to make things worse.â
âWorse?â Nicholas turned back to me, his dark eyes filled with raw frustration. âHow the fuck could it have been worse than this?â (Y/N), I couldâve handled this days ago if youâd just told me!
My chest ached, and I felt like I couldnât breathe under the weight of his words. âIâm sorry,â I whispered, my voice barely audible.
Finally, he let out a heavy sigh, his shoulders sagging as if the fight had drained out of him. âI canât do this right now,â he muttered, running a hand down his face.Â
The staff remained frozen, their eyes wide as they processed what had just unfolded. Nicholas looked around, his chests heaving. âEverybody, go inside please,â he closed his eyes and lazily waved his hand at his side.
Maria, standing near the kitchen door, nodded sharply and began ushering the others inside, herding them like sheep. Paolo shot me a lookâconcern and something else, maybe pityâbefore clearing his throat sharply. âYou heard him. Letâs move,â he barked, his voice brisk but professional, cutting through the tension like a knife. Slowly, the crowd began to disperse, their footsteps echoing against the stone paths as they filed back into the house.
Nicholasâs gaze stayed locked on me. His gaze was cold, unrelenting, and it made my chest ache in a way I wasnât prepared for. The last time Iâd seen that same look in his eyes, the same mixture of pain and anger, was on the night he left for Los Angeles, when we had argued in this very spot.
The garden was bathed in the warm glow of golden hour, the sunlight filtering through the treetops in soft beams. It was the same garden where Nicholas and I had shared stolen moments, whispered dreams, and a hundred quiet kisses. But it felt different. The world felt too still, too calm, considering the storm brewing between us. I could hear the distant hum of crickets, the rustling of leaves in the breeze, but it all felt mutedâlike my senses were dulled by the ache in my chest as I stared at him.
Nic stood in front of me, his arms crossed over his chest, his posture tense. His jaw was tight, his dark eyes unreadable, and for the first time since Iâd known him, he felt like a stranger.
âSo, thatâs it?â I asked, my voice trembling despite my best efforts to keep it steady. âYouâre just⊠ending things?â
He sighed, running a hand through his hair, his shoulders sagging slightly. â(Y/N), this isnât easy for me. You think I want to do this?â
âThen donât!â I snapped, the words bursting out of me before I could stop them. âIf itâs so hard, then donât fucking do it, Nic! We can make this work.â
His gaze softened for a moment, but then he shook his head, his expression hardening again. âI canât. Iâve thought about this a hundred different ways, and it always ends the same. If I stay, Iâll end up resenting you. And if I go and we try to hold on, Iâll end up hurting you. Either way, you lose.â
âLet me decide that!â I shouted, my voice breaking. âGod, Nicholas, donât you get it? I donât care about the risk. I want to try. I want us to work.â
He closed his eyes, exhaling sharply as if trying to steady himself. âYou think I donât want that too?â he said quietly, his voice low but laced with frustration. âI do, (Y/N). I want it so fucking badly it hurts. But I canât give you what you deserve right now. Not when Iâm about to dive headfirst into⊠all of this.â
âInto what?â I demanded, my chest heaving. âInto auditions and callbacks and God knows what else? Nic, you donât have to go through that alone. Iâm right here. Iâm always right here.â
âThatâs the problem,â he muttered, almost to himself. He looked at me then, his eyes burning with a mix of anguish and determination. âI donât want you waiting around for me while I figure my shit out. You deserve more than that.â
âDonât fucking tell me what I deserve!â I yelled, the tears Iâd been holding back finally spilling over. âYouâre not doing this for me. Youâre doing it for yourself. So donât stand there and act like youâre some kind of martyr.â
His jaw clenched, and he looked away, his hands curling into fists at his sides. âMaybe I am doing it for myself,â he said finally, his voice quiet but firm. âBut that doesnât mean Iâm wrong.â
I laughed bitterly. âYouâve spent all summer acting like everything was perfect, likeâlike what we had actually mattered, and two months ago, you told me that I should go with you and now youâre just walking away? Why the fuck did you even bother with me, Nic? Was I just some good fuck to you? Just some hometown fling before you head off to bigger and better things?â
His face twisted with hurt, and he ran a hand through his hair, his frustration palpable. âDonât you fucking say that,â he growled, his voice low and dangerous. âYou know thatâs not what this was. You know you mean more to me than that.â
âDo I?â I challenged, stepping closer until we were inches apart. My chest heaved with anger, my eyes stinging with unshed tears. âBecause it sure as hell doesnât feel like it. It feels like youâve been stringing me along all summer, letting me fall for you, just so you could rip the rug out from under me when it was convenient.â
Nicholasâs jaw tightened, and he looked away, his shoulders sagging as if the weight of my words had physically hit him. âThatâs not what I was trying to do,â he said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper.
âThen what the fuck were you trying to do, Nic?â I demanded, my voice cracking as the tears Iâd been holding back spilled over. âBecause I donât understand. I donât understand how you can look at me like Iâm your whole world one minute and then tell me youâre leaving the next.â
He sighed, his hands raking through his hair as he took a step back. âI donât want to hurt you,â he said finally, his voice filled with raw emotion. âThatâs why I canât do this. I canât give you what you deserve right now, (Y/N). Not while Iâm chasing this dream. It wouldnât be fair to you.â
âFair?â I echoed, my voice trembling with disbelief. âYou think this is fair? Breaking my heart the night before you leave?â
âIâd rather break it now than let you waste your time on someone who canât give you what you need,â he said, his voice tight. âI canât be what you need right now, (Y/N). I canât be here. And you deserve better than that.â
âI donât want better,â I said, my voice breaking as I stepped closer to him, my hands trembling as I reached for his. âI want you. I donât care if itâs hard or messy. I want to make this work, Nic. Why wonât you let me?â
His hands closed over mine, his grip firm but trembling as he looked down at me, his dark eyes filled with a pain that mirrored my own. âBecause you deserve someone who can give you all of himself,â he said softly. âAnd right now, I canât. Acting is all Iâve ever wanted, and if I stay here â if I try to juggle this and you â Iâm going to end up failing at both.â
I shook my head, the tears streaming down my face as I tried to pull my hands away, but he held on, his grip tightening as if he couldnât bear to let go. âYou donât get to decide that for me,â I said, my voice trembling with anger and heartbreak. âYou donât get to tell me what I deserve.â
âMaybe I donât,â he admitted, his voice thick with emotion. âBut Iâm doing it anyway. Because I love you too much to half-ass this, (Y/N). And Iâm scared that if I try to hold on to you while Iâm chasing this, Iâm going to lose you anyway.â
His words hit me like a punch to the gut, and I felt my knees buckle beneath the weight of them. âYouâre already losing me,â I whispered, my voice barely audible.
Nicâs jaw tightened, his eyes shining with unshed tears as he cupped my face in his hands. âI know,â he said, his voice breaking. âAnd itâs killing me.â
He leaned down, pressing his forehead against mine as his thumbs brushed away my tears. For a moment, we just stood there, the silence between us filled with everything we couldnât say. And then he kissed me, soft and slow, like he was trying to memorize the feel of me before he walked away.
When he pulled back, I felt like the ground had been ripped out from under me. He let go of my hands, stepping back as if putting distance between us was the only way he could follow through with what heâd just said.
âI hate you,â I mumbled.
Nic flinched as if my words physically hit him, his shoulders sagging under the weight of them. For a moment, he didnât say anything. He just stood there, his dark brown eyes locked on mine, filled with a mixture of regret and anguish. âI hate me too,â he finally whispered, his voice barely audible but laced with raw honesty.
The admission twisted something inside me. I wanted to scream at him, hit him, anything to make him feel a fraction of the pain that was tearing me apart. But instead, I just stood there, trembling and broken, watching as he turned and walked away.
I stayed in the garden long after he disappeared, the warmth of the summer night doing little to thaw the icy grip around my chest. When I finally found the strength to move, I felt hollow, like heâd taken a piece of me with him when he left.
The sound of Nicholas clearing his throat pulled me back to the present. âYou, too, (Y/N),â he spoke softly.
This wasnât how things were supposed to go. None of this was. I wanted to scream, to plead, to explain. But I couldnât. The words stuck in my throat, choked by the weight of everything I hadnât said when it mattered most.
I nodded once, my movements stiff and mechanical. âOkay,â I whispered, my voice barely audible. I turned on my heel and began walking toward the house, the sound of my footsteps on the stone path feeling unnaturally loud in the heavy silence.
And just like that, the party was over before it even started.
As I reached the threshold of the French doors, I hesitated, glancing back over my shoulder. Nicholas was still standing there, his back to me, his hands on his hips as he stared at the ground. He looked⊠broken. And I hated that I was part of the reason why.
I opened my mouth to say something, but the words died in my throat. What could I possibly say that would make any of this better? So I turned away, stepping inside and letting the door swing shut behind me.
The air inside the house was tense, the energy crackling with the weight of what had just transpired. Staff members bustled about, their voices hushed as they pretended not to glance in my direction. I quickly ducked my head and made my way to the supply closet at the base of the stairs, desperate for a moment of solitude.
Once inside, I shut the door behind me and leaned against it, my chest heaving as I fought to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill over. The small, dimly lit space felt like a sanctuary â a place where I could finally breathe, even if just for a moment.
I sank to the floor, my knees pulling to my chest as I buried my face in my hands. My mind raced with everything that had just happened, every word Nicholas had thrown at me, every ounce of his anger and betrayal. It played on a loop, each moment stabbing at my heart like a knife.
I wanted to scream. I wanted to cry. I wanted to storm out of this house and never look back. But more than anything, I wanted to go back in time and undo everything that had brought me to this moment.
My head jerked up as a faint knock came through the door. For a moment, I froze, my breath caught in my throat.
âCara mia, are you in there?â Paoloâs voice muffled through.
I hesitated, wiping at my face. I planned on standing, but the door slowly cracked open before opening fully. I looked up to see Paolo, Maria, and my mom all at the door.
Their faces were a mix of concern and quiet understanding. My mom crouched down immediately, her arms opening as she settled on her knees in front of me. I didnât even hesitate â I crumpled into her embrace, the dam finally breaking as the tears spilled over.
She wrapped me up tightly, her hand cradling the back of my head as I sobbed into her shoulder. âShh, itâs okay,â she murmured softly, rocking me gently. âLet it out, sweetheart. Iâm here.â
Maria crouched next to her, her usually bubbly demeanor replaced with a rare seriousness. â(Y/N), you did the best you could,â she said quietly. âYou were trying to protect your mom, protect yourself. Nobody can blame you for that.â
Paolo leaned against the doorframe, his arms crossed, but his expression wasnât stern. It was softer than Iâd ever seen it, his sharp features etched with something almost like sympathy. âThat bitch,â he muttered, shaking his head. âSheâs vile. Manipulative. None of this is on you, sweetie.â
I tried to speak, to explain, but the words got lost in the overwhelming tide of emotion. My mom held me tighter, her voice a soothing murmur as she whispered reassurances I barely registered through the sound of my own sobs.
âI didnât want this to happen,â I finally choked out, my voice muffled against her shoulder. âI didnât want to hurt anyone.â
âYou didnât,â my mom said firmly, pulling back just enough to look me in the eyes. Her own were glassy with unshed tears, her expression fierce. âYou didnât hurt anyone. That woman did. Sheâs the one who lied and threatened and created this mess â not you.â
Maria nodded, placing a hand on my knee. âSheâs right. Youâre not the villain here, (Y/N). Youâre just caught in the middle of something none of us couldâve seen coming.â
Paolo sighed, running a hand through his hair. âAnd Nicholas,â he added, his tone softening. âHeâs hurt and angry now, sĂŹ, but heâll see the truth eventually. Give him time.â
I wiped at my eyes, sniffling as I leaned back against the wall. My mom reached into her pocket and pulled out a tissue, gently dabbing at my cheeks like she used to when I was little. Her touch was so tender, so grounding, that it almost made me cry all over again.
âTake a breath, sweetheart,â she said softly. âYouâve been carrying so much on your shoulders. Let us help you carry it now.â
I nodded weakly, taking a shuddering breath as I tried to calm the storm raging inside me. They stayed with me in the small, cramped closet, their presence a quiet reminder that I wasnât alone, even in the middle of this nightmare.
After a few minutes, the sound of hurried footsteps echoed down the hallway, followed by the distinct voice of Mrs. Chavez. âWhere is she?â she called out, her tone brisk but tinged with worry.
Paolo stepped out into the hall. âIn here,â he said quietly, gesturing to the door.
Mrs. Chavez appeared a moment later, her usual grace and composure slightly shaken. Her gaze softened the moment she saw me huddled on the floor, and she crouched down beside my mom, her hand resting gently on my shoulder.
âOh, darling,â she murmured, her voice warm and soothing. âIâm so sorry. I had no idea she was putting you through this.â
I shook my head, wiping at my eyes again. âItâs not your fault,â I whispered.
Mrs. Chavezâs expression tightened, her jaw clenching as she glanced toward the hallway where the chaos had unfolded. âIt is my fault,â she said firmly. âI brought that woman into our lives, and I didnât see her for what she really was. But that ends today.â
Her words carried a weight, a promise of action that I hadnât realized I needed to hear. She turned her gaze back to me, her eyes filled with a fierce protectiveness. âYouâre not going anywhere, (Y/N),â she said firmly. âYou and your mom are part of this family, and no one â not her, not anyone â will take that away from you.â
I nodded, the lump in my throat too big to speak around. My mom squeezed my hand, her own eyes shimmering with gratitude as she glanced at Mrs. Chavez.
âThank you,â my mom whispered.
Mrs. Chavez offered a small, kind smile before turning back to me. âTake as much time as you need to collect yourself, sweetheart. Weâll handle everything else.â
Her words were a balm, a lifeline in the middle of the chaos. I nodded again, my chest loosening just a fraction as I realized I wasnât as alone in this as Iâd thought.
For a moment, I allowed myself to breathe, to lean into the support being offered to me. My momâs hand remained on mine, steady and warm, while Maria gave me a reassuring nod, her bright eyes filled with quiet determination. Paolo lingered by the door, his sharp gaze scanning the hallway as though ready to intercept anyone who might disturb this fragile moment of calm.
Mrs. Chavezâs presence was a surprising comfort. I hadnât expected her to take my side so firmly, especially given everything that had just unraveled. But her unwavering resolve gave me the strength to nod, to whisper, âOkay.â
She straightened, smoothing down her blouse as she glanced back at Paolo. âGather the staff and let them know theyâre dismissed for the evening,â she instructed. âTheyâve worked hard enough for tonight; they can come back tomorrow to get rid of everything.â
Paolo nodded curtly, already stepping into the hall to carry out her orders.
âMaria,â Mrs. Chavez continued, her voice softening as she turned to her. âCould you help Mrs. (L/N) with some tea for (Y/N)? I think we all need a moment to regroup.â
Maria gave me a small smile before standing and gesturing to my mom. âCome on, letâs get you both something warm,â she said gently.
My mom hesitated, her grip on my hand tightening slightly as though reluctant to leave me. But I managed a faint smile, squeezing her hand back. âIâll be okay, Mom,â I said softly. âI promise.â
She searched my face for a moment before nodding, brushing a stray strand of hair from my forehead like she used to when I was a child. âWeâll be right back,â she murmured before standing and following Maria out of the room.
That left me with Mrs. Chavez, who remained crouched beside me, her eyes soft but steady as she studied me.
âIâm so sorry, Mrs. Chavez,â I whispered.
She gave me a sympathetic smile, âFor what?â
I wiped away the salty mucus running down my nose with the collar of my uniform, âNicholas and IâŠwe wereââ
Mrs. Chavez raised a hand gently, stopping me mid-sentence. Her expression remained calm, though her eyes softened with understanding. âDarling, stop,â she said quietly, her voice steady but kind. âIâm not here to judge you or demand explanations. I know my son, and I know his heart.â She paused, her gaze holding mine. âWhatever happened between you two, I can see itâs complicated. But I also see the way he looks at you. Thatâs not something I can ignore.â
My breath caught in my throat as her words sank in. I searched her face, expecting disappointment or anger, but found neither. Instead, there was only warmth and something that almost looked like pity.
âIâm sorry,â I said again, my voice trembling. âI didnât mean for it to happen this way.â
She let out a soft sigh, reaching out to take my hand in hers. âLife is messy, (Y/N). Love is messy. And sometimes, people find themselves in situations they never intended. That doesnât make them bad people.â Her thumb brushed over my knuckles in a comforting gesture. âYouâre not a bad person, (Y/N).â
Tears welled up in my eyes again, and I looked down at our joined hands, the weight of her words almost too much to bear. âI didnât want to hurt him,â I whispered, my voice breaking. âOr you, or anyone.â
âI know you didnât. Trust me, this house has always been full of whispers, lies, and drama. This isnât the first time, and it certainly wonât be the last,â she said softly.
I nodded slowly, though her words didnât erase the ache in my chest. âHe hates me now,â I whispered, the tears threatening to spill over again.
Mrs. Chavez shook her head, her hand moving to gently tilt my chin up so Iâd meet her gaze. âNicholas doesnât hate you,â she said, her tone steady and certain. âHeâs angry, yes. Hurt. But hate? That boy has loved you for far too long to ever hate you.â
Her words soothed the raw wound inside me. But they also felt like a double-edged sword, a reminder of the complicated, messy love I shared with Nicholas.
âWhat do I do now?â I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.
Mrs. Chavez sighed softly, her thumb brushing against the back of my hand in a reassuring gesture. âYou give him time,â she said simply. âTime to process everything, time to heal. And when heâs ready, you show him that youâre still the same girl he fell in love with all those years ago.â
I nodded, unable to speak as the lump in my throat grew tighter. Mrs. Chavez gave my hand one last squeeze before standing, her usual grace and composure returning as she smoothed her blouse once more
âTake as long as you need, okay?â she said, her tone gentle but firm.
I nodded again, my voice still caught somewhere between my chest and my throat. She offered me a small, reassuring smile before turning and leaving the room, her heels clicking softly against the polished floor.
I stayed on the floor for a while after Mrs. Chavez left, her words replaying in my mind. The knot in my chest loosened slightly, replaced by a strange, quiet determination. If she believed in me, if she thought I still had a place here, maybe â just maybe â I could believe it, too.
But it didnât change the fact that Nicholas was still furious with me. And rightfully so. I had betrayed his trust, whether out of fear or misplaced loyalty to my family, and I couldnât take that back. All I could do was hope that time, as Mrs. Chavez suggested, might help heal some of the wounds Iâd caused.
I pulled myself to my feet, my legs shaky but steady enough to carry me back to the kitchen. The house was quieter now, the hum of activity from earlier replaced by an uneasy calm. When I stepped into the kitchen, my mom and Maria were waiting for me with steaming cups of tea, their expressions a mix of concern and relief.
âHere,â my mom said, pressing a cup into my hands. âDrink this. Itâll help.â
I nodded, taking a sip and letting the warmth spread through me. The tea did help, if only because it gave me something to focus on other than the turmoil swirling inside me.
Maria leaned against the counter, her arms crossed as she studied me. âWhat now?â she asked, her tone softer than usual.
I shrugged, setting the cup down and wrapping my arms around myself. âI donât know,â I admitted. âI guess Iâll just⊠stay out of his way for a while. Give him space.â
Maria nodded slowly, her eyes narrowing slightly as she considered my words. âMaybe. But donât let him push you away completely. Nicholas is stubborn, but heâs also human.â
My mom reached out, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear like she used to when I was a child. âYouâre stronger than you think, sweetheart,â she said softly. âAnd youâre not alone in this.â
I smiled weakly, grateful for their support even if I didnât feel entirely deserving of it. âThanks, Mom,â I murmured.
Paolo poked his head into the kitchen then, his expression as sharp as ever. âNo sign of that cagna,â he announced. âI think she left.â
âGood,â Maria muttered, her lips curling into a smirk. âAbout time she slithered out of here. I never liked her.â
Paoloâs gaze softened slightly as he looked at me. âYou okay?â
I nodded, managing a small smile. âIâll be fine,â I said, though the words felt more like a hope than a certainty.
He gave me a curt nod before disappearing back into the hallway, leaving me alone with my mom and Maria. I took another sip of tea, the warmth settling in my chest like a fragile shield against the storm that still raged inside me.
The next few days were a blur. The grand estate, usually so full of life and activity, felt quieter, the atmosphere heavy with tension. It seemed everyone was tiptoeing around the aftermath of the blowout, from the staff to Mrs. Chavez. Even Paolo had gone unusually silent, though his protective glares whenever someone mentioned Valerie were hard to miss.
I kept my head down, focusing on my tasks and doing my best to avoid Nicholas. I couldnât face himânot yet. Every time I passed through the garden or the library or even the kitchen, my heart raced, half-expecting him to appear and demand answers I still wasnât sure how to give.
Maria, ever the bright spot in my day, kept a close watch on me. She had a way of easing the tension with a quick joke or a simple squeeze of my hand when no one was looking. My mom, too, had become even more attentive, her concern etched into her features as she checked on me constantly.
But Nicholas? He was nowhere to be found, on the estate at least. He had gone back to Los Angeles, back to his place. And it didnât take long for Valerie to end up winning in the end. She had ended up going to every tabloid that would hear her side of the story, and I bet she was paid pretty well for every single one.
âValerie: âNicholas Alexander Chavez Cheated On Meââ
âA Broken Engagement: The Truth Behind Nicholas Alexander Chavezâs Secret Affairâ
âHollywood Star Nicholas Alexander Chavez Caught in Love Triangle with FiancĂ©e and Maidâ
âInside Nicholas Alexander Chavezâs Explosive Breakupâ
The headlines were relentless, splashed across glossy pages and plastered on every celebrity gossip website. Photographs of Nicholas and Valerie at charity galas and red-carpet events were juxtaposed with grainy, invasive shots of the estate, Nicholas looking rough while out running errands, and exclusive images courtesy of Valerie.Â
Her version of events dominated the headlines, painting herself as the tragic victim of a heartless actor and his manipulative fling with the âhelp.â The stories twisted every detail, skewing the truth into a salacious narrative that catered to gossip-hungry readers. The stories even dragged me into the spotlight, labeling me as everything from a conniving gold digger to an innocent pawn in Nicholasâs supposed âgames.â
The narrative was clear: Nicholas was the cheating fiancĂ©, Valerie the heartbroken victim, and I â the villain.
I avoided looking at the articles, but it was impossible to ignore the whispers among the staff, the way Paolo slammed down his phone and ranting in Italian in the kitchen after scrolling through social media. My mom banned any newspapers from the house, her protective instincts going into overdrive as she tried to shield me from the worst of it. Even Mrs. Chavezâs normally serene demeanor had shifted into something more fraught, her jaw tight as she made calls and spoke in hushed tones to her lawyer.
Maria, on the other hand, kept tabs on the media frenzy with a quiet determination. âLook, people are starting to turn on her,â she said one morning, setting her phone on the kitchen counter and showing me some tweets.
Apparently, Valerieâs attempts to gain sympathy were backfiring. Social media sleuths dug up old interviews and photos, piecing together a narrative of a woman who had been desperate for fame and willing to do whatever it took to keep it. Even some of the hired staff that were sub-contracted for the gender reveal had come out saying that Valerie was a liar. Thatâs when comments began flooding in, questioning her story and calling her out for her lies.
âCanât believe she lied about her pregnancy!â
âNicholas doesnât owe her anything if she was faking a baby.â
âTeam Nicholas all the way. Sheâs sketchy AF.â
Still, the damage was done. Nicholasâs name was dragged through the mud, and so was mine. He disappeared from the estate entirely, no doubt retreating to wherever he could escape the relentless glare of the media.
As for me, I kept my head down and worked as much as I could. I stayed out of sight whenever Mrs. Chavez entertained guests, avoided the staff gatherings, and did my best to pretend I wasnât the unwitting center of a media circus.
But no matter how hard I tried to move on, the weight of it all lingered. Nicholasâs absence was a constant reminder of everything that had gone wrong, every choice Iâd made that led to this moment. And every time I glanced at the empty garden where it all came to a head, my chest tightened with a familiar ache.
It wasnât until almost three weeks later that I finally saw him again. Mrs. Chavez had arranged for Nicholas to return to the estate to finalize some of the logistics with the family lawyers away from the paparazzi stalking him in Los Angeles. I didnât know if it was intentional on her part or just sheer coincidence that she mentioned it while passing me in the hall, but either way, it felt like my last chance.
By the time his car pulled up to the driveway, the air outside was heavy with the promise of rain, clouds rolling in and casting shadows across the estate. I watched from the kitchen window as Nicholas stepped out, his movements stiff, his shoulders squared like he was bracing himself for a battle. My heart clenched at the sight of him, his face sharper, more guarded than I remembered. He looked tired in his plain white t-shirt and sweatpants, worn down by everything that had unfolded since that disastrous evening.
I stayed frozen as he disappeared into the house, my pulse thundering in my ears. I hadnât thought beyond this moment â hadnât planned what Iâd say, how Iâd approach him. I only knew I couldnât let him leave again without trying to make things right.
I found him that night sitting by the pool, just as we both liked to do that entire summer all those years ago.
The night air was thick with humidity, the kind that clung to your skin and made every breath feel heavy. The estate was quiet, save for the soft rustling of the trees and the occasional chirp of a cricket. I hesitated at the edge of the garden, the faint glow of the pool lights illuminating Nicholasâs silhouette as he sat at the edge, his feet dangling over the side. A beer rested on the ground next to him, untouched.
I didnât know what I was expecting â to find him pacing in frustration, to hear him yell at me again, to be met with indifference. But this? The quiet, vulnerable stillness of him caught me off guard.
Taking a deep breath, I stepped forward, the sound of my footsteps muted by the damp grass then shuffled across the concrete. My footsteps were quiet, but he must have heard me because his head tilted slightly, though he didnât look back. I stopped a few feet away, the poolâs reflection dancing on his face.
âCan I sit?â I asked softly, my voice barely above a whisper.
Nicholas didnât answer right away. He sat there, staring at the rippling water as if the answer he wanted might emerge from its depths. His jaw tensed, his dark eyes unreadable, but eventually, he nodded once, the movement barely perceptible.
I took it as permission and sank down beside him, keeping a careful distance. The concrete beneath me was cool, the faint smell of chlorine mingling with the earthy scent of petrichor. My heart pounded in my chest as the silence stretched between us, heavy and unyielding.
âIâm sorry,â I said finally, the words trembling as they left my lips. âFor not telling you. For all of it. So much couldâve been avoided if I justâŠâ the words died on my tongue.
âStop,â he interrupted, his voice quiet but firm. He turned to me then, his dark brown eyes piercing in the dim light. âYou donât have to keep apologizing.â
âBut I do,â I insisted, my chest tightening as I looked at him. âYouâre right. I shouldâve told you. I shouldâve trusted you, and I didnât. I let her scare me, and Iââ
âBaby,â he said softly, the word wrapping around me like a lifeline. His voice was strained, but the sharp edge it had carried before was gone. âI get it. Okay? I understand why you didnât tell me.â
I blinked at him, my breath catching. âYou⊠do?â
He nodded, running a hand through his hair, his fingers tugging at the strands as if trying to ground himself. âSheâs a fucking piece of work,â he muttered, his gaze flicking back to the water. âAnd she knew exactly what to say to keep you quiet. Sheâs done it to me too, in her own way. Letâs just say there was a reason I was gonna break up with her before sheâŠâ he paused. âI just didnât see it until it was too late.â
I swallowed hard, the lump in my throat making it difficult to speak. âThat doesnât excuse what I did,â I whispered. âOr what I didnât do.â
Nicholas turned to me again, his gaze softer now, though still heavy with emotion. âIâm not saying it does,â he said quietly. âBut I also know you were trying to protect your mom, yourself.â
I nodded, my eyes stinging as I tried to hold back tears. âI didnât want to hurt you, Nic. I swear I didnât.â
He exhaled sharply, his shoulders relaxing slightly as he reached through the space between us and raked his fingers through the back of my hair, his thumb repeatedly brushing back the hair near my temple. âI know, baby,â he murmured. âAnd I shouldnât have screamed at you like that. Especially in front of everyone. Fuck, I was justâŠâ
I closed my eyes, savoring the warmth of his touch and the quiet intimacy of the moment. For the first time in what felt like forever, the tension that had weighed on my chest began to ease.
I bit my lip. âYou had every right to be angry, Nic,â I said. âI kept something from you that I shouldnât have. And Iâm sorry.â When I opened my eyes again, Nicholas had scooted closer, closing the distance between us, and was watching me with a tenderness that made my heart ache.
He shook his head, âIâm the one who should be apologizing,â he said, his voice barely above a whisper. âYou didnât deserve that, (Y/N). Not after everything. I was never mad at you, not really. I was mad at myself. For letting her⊠I donât know, take over my life. For letting her manipulate me for so long. Iâm mad at her, at this whole fucking situation. But not you, baby. Never you.â
His words broke something inside me, and the tears Iâd been holding back spilled over. I let out a shaky breath, leaning into his touch as my chest ached with a mix of relief and regret. âIâm so sorry, Nic,â I whispered. âItâs not your fault,â I said softly. âSheâs the one that lied about being pregnant in the first place. Itâs not your fault you chose to step up when it mattered.â
Nicholas let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head while brushing away the tears that spilled out of me with his thumb. âYeah, well, I shouldâve known better.â
I nodded, my throat too tight to speak. He pulled me into his arms then, holding me close as I buried my face in his chest. The steady beat of his heart beneath my ear was a balm to my frayed nerves, a reminder that no matter how messy or complicated things got, we still had each other.
For a moment, neither of us spoke, the silence between us heavy but not unbearable. I could feel the warmth of his presence, the steady rhythm of his breathing as he.
âNo offense, but I never liked her,â I mumbled, wiping away my boogers, âEven before the fake pregnancy thing.â
His chest rumbled beneath my ear as he let out an audible laugh then, a genuine one. âYou donât say,â Nicholas replied, his tone light but with an edge of teasing. His laughter warmed me, a sound I hadnât realized I missed so much. His hand stayed on my back, tracing slow, calming circles as he added, âWhat gave it away? The constant passive-aggressive digs or the terrifyingly fake smile?â
I pulled back slightly, my tears drying as I looked up at him. âBoth. And the way she treated everyone like shit.â I sniffled, a wry smile tugging at my lips despite everything. âShe wasnât exactly subtle.â
Nicholas smirked, shaking his head. âYou shouldâve told her off way sooner.â
âI thought about it,â I admitted, letting out a soft laugh. âBut I couldnât defy the soon-to-be lady of the house now, could I?â
His smirk faltered, his expression softening as he cupped my cheek. âYou shouldnât have had to deal with any of that, baby. Especially not because of me.â
âIt wasnât just because of you,â I said quickly, placing my hand over his. âI stayed because of my mom and Mrs. Chavez. AndâŠâ I hesitated, looking down before meeting his gaze again. âAnd maybe because I wasnât ready to let go of this place. Of⊠you.â
Nicholasâs dark eyes searched mine, his thumb brushing softly against my cheek. âYou donât have to let go,â he murmured. âNot of us. Not anymore.â
I blinked up at him, my heart swelling with a fragile hope I hadnât dared to feel before. âYou mean that?â
He nodded, leaning down so his forehead rested against mine. âIâve made a lot of mistakes, (Y/N). But letting you go back then? That was the worst one, and Iâm not making it again.â
My breath caught, the sincerity in his voice and the closeness of his touch grounding me. âI love you, Nic. So much. I never stopped. Never.â
Nicholas exhaled deeply, his fingers sliding into the hair at the nape of my neck as he pulled me closer, his lips brushing softly against my forehead. âI never stopped loving you, too,â he murmured, his voice low and raw with emotion. âBut you already knew that,â he smirked ever so slightly.
The rain began to fall in gentle droplets, cool against the humid air, but neither of us moved. The world around us seemed to fade, leaving only the sound of his breathing, the warmth of his body, and the truth we had both been too afraid to confront until now.
Nicholas tilted my chin up with his fingers, his dark brown eyes searching mine. âCan we start over?â he asked finally, his voice soft but filled with quiet hope.
My heart ached at the tenderness in his words, the vulnerability in his gaze. I nodded slowly, a small, shaky smile tugging at my lips.
Nicholas let out a breath, his shoulders relaxing as a faint smile crossed his lips. âGood,â he said softly, his hand reaching up to brush a strand of hair from my face.
His lips found mine then, soft and tentative at first, as though testing the fragile bond between us. But when I didnât pull away, he deepened the kiss, his hands tightening around my waist as he pulled me flush against him. I melted into him, my fingers clutching at his shirt as the rain grew heavier, soaking us both.
The cool droplets mixed with the heat of his touch, the contrast igniting something wild and desperate within me. Nicholas groaned against my lips, his hands roaming over my back before settling on my hips, pulling me onto his lap. My skirt bunched around my thighs, the wet fabric clinging to my skin, but I couldnât bring myself to care. All that mattered was him â his lips, his hands, the way he made me feel like the only person in the world.
His hands moved up, gripping the sides of my waist as he kissed me like it was the only thing tethering him to this earth. I shifted in his lap, straddling him, the fabric of my soaked skirt bunching between us. His mouth left mine to trail down my neck, his hot breath sending shivers through me despite the cool rain cascading over us.
âGod,â Nicholas murmured against my skin, his voice rough and low. âDo you have any idea how much Iâve missed this? Missed you?â
I didnât trust my voice to reply, not when his lips were doing things that made coherent thought impossible. Instead, I tilted my head to give him better access, my fingers threading through his damp hair. His hands roamed down, sliding beneath the hem of my shirt and brushing against the bare skin of my back, sending electric jolts straight to my core.
âYouâre soaked,â he whispered, his lips pausing just below my ear.
I let out a breathless laugh, threading my fingers through his damp hair as his teeth grazed the sensitive spot on my neck. âRight back at you, baby.â
He pulled back at the word, his hands gripping my hips tighter. âSay that again.â
âBaby,â I whispered, leaning in to press a teasing kiss to his jaw.
He chuckled, low and throaty, the sound vibrating against my skin. I grabbed his face and pulled his lips back to mine. The kiss was urgent now, full of pent-up desire and weeks of tension finally snapping.
His hands gripped my thighs, sliding upward beneath the wet fabric of my skirt until his fingers found the edge of my panties.The sound of the rain grew louder, the rhythmic patter against the poolâs surface blending with our labored breathing and soft moans.
He shifted, guiding me back until I was lying flat against the wet concrete, the cool surface a stark contrast to the heat radiating from both of us. His body covered mine, his weight pressing me down in the most delicious way as his hands continued their exploration, finding every inch of skin he could reach.
âFuck,â he muttered against my lips, his voice raw with need. âIâve been dying for thisâdying for you.â
My fingers dug into his back as he kissed me with a hunger that felt almost feral, his hands tugging my soaked panties down my legs and tossing them aside. His lips found my collarbone, trailing wet kisses down my chest as his hand slid between my thighs, his touch igniting sparks everywhere he went.
I gasped, my head falling back against the concrete as his fingers explored, teasing and coaxing reactions from me that left me trembling. The rain kept falling, the cool droplets mingling with the heat of our bodies, and the world beyond us faded away.
âI need you to promise me something,â he murmured, his voice low as his lips returned to mine.
âWhat?â I breathed, my voice shaky as I looked up at him. His dark brown eyes burned with intensity, his face inches from mine.
âPromise me youâll never keep anything from me again,â he said, his tone soft but firm. âI donât care what it is. If somethingâs wrong, if someoneâs fucking with youâI need to know.â
My chest ached at the raw vulnerability in his voice, the weight of his words settling heavily between us. âI promise,â I whispered, my hands framing his face. âI wonât keep anything from you ever again. You mean too much to me, Nic.â
His lips crashed into mine again, his relief palpable as he kissed me with a passion that left me breathless. âGood,â he murmured against my mouth. âBecause Iâd fucking move heaven and earth for you, (Y/N). Do you hear me? Youâre my everything.â
My breath hitched at his words, the sheer intensity of his confession leaving me speechless. His forehead rested against mine, his breath mingling with mine as the rain continued to fall in a relentless rhythm around us.
âYouâre my everything, too,â I whispered, my voice trembling with emotion.
His hands slid down my body, tracing every curve and hollow as if memorizing me all over again. When his fingers slipped between my thighs, I let out a soft gasp, my hips instinctively rising to meet his touch. He groaned against my lips, his breath hot and ragged as he murmured my name.
âIâve missed you so much, baby,â he whispered, his forehead still resting against mine as his fingers moved in slow, torturous circles. âMissed the way you feel. The way you taste. The way you look at me like Iâm the only man in the world.â
âYou are,â I breathed, my voice trembling as I clung to him.
Nicholas froze at my words, his dark eyes locking onto mine with an intensity that made my chest tighten. His fingers stilled for a moment, resting against me as he let out a shaky breath.
My hand came up to cradle his face, my thumb brushing over the sharp line of his jaw. âYouâve always been.â
A low, guttural sound escaped him, and he captured my lips in a searing kiss that left me dizzy. His hands gripped my hips, pulling me flush against him as his mouth claimed mine with a hunger that sent sparks of heat coursing through my body.
The rain fell harder, soaking us both to the skin, but neither of us cared. The world around us disappeared, leaving only the sound of our ragged breathing and the feel of his body pressing against mine. His hands roamed my body, exploring every inch of me as if rediscovering a treasure he thought heâd lost.
He leaned down, his lips trailing over my neck, my collarbone, leaving a fiery path in their wake. My back arched against the wet concrete, and he took the opportunity to push my shirt higher, exposing my damp skin to the cool night air. His lips followed, pressing kisses to my stomach, my ribs, his breath warm and teasing.
âI donât deserve you,â he said, his voice thick with emotion as he looked up at me. His hands slid beneath my thighs, spreading them as he knelt between my legs.Â
Before I could respond, his mouth replaced his fingers, and a cry escaped my lips as he teased me with his tongue. The intensity of his touch, the way he seemed to worship me, made my head spin. My hands tangled in his rain-soaked hair, pulling him closer as he sent wave after wave of pleasure crashing through me.
Nicholasâs hands gripped my hips, his fingers digging into my skin as he pulled me even closer, as if he couldnât get enough. His mouth moved with a deliberate slowness that drove me wild, each flick of his tongue, every soft, teasing suck a reminder of how much he had missed me, how much he wanted me. The rain blurred my vision, mingling with the tears that slid down my face, but I didnât care. All that mattered was him and the way he was unraveling me with every touch.
My breath hitched, my thighs trembling against his shoulders. I tried to push up, to chase the feeling building inside me, but his hands held me down firmly. âNot so fast,â he whispered, his lips brushing over my sensitive skin.
I whimpered, my fingers gripping his hair as he continued his slow, torturous rhythm. My body writhed against the slick concrete, a desperate plea for more, for release. But Nicholas took his time, savoring every moment, every reaction he pulled from me.
âPlease,â I gasped, my voice breaking as I tugged at his hair. âNic, I needââ
He lifted his head, his dark eyes locking onto mine. The sight of himâhis rain-drenched hair, the water dripping down his sharp jaw, and the raw hunger in his gazeâmade my stomach flip. âYou need what, baby?â he asked, his voice a low growl. âTell me.â
âYou,â I breathed, the word slipping out before I could think. âI need you, Nic. Please.â
He sat on his knees then, his body towering over mine, rainwater dripping from his hair onto my flushed skin. His wet white shirt clung to every peak and valley of his sculpted muscles, his nipples visible through the soaked fabric.
Nicholasâs gaze darkened as his hands moved to the hem of his soaked shirt, peeling it away and revealing the smooth, golden skin beneath. The rain traced rivulets down his chest, following the sharp contours of his muscles. His body, damp and glistening, hovered over mine like a storm ready to break.
I reached for him, my hands trailing up his arms and across his chest as if grounding myself to him. My fingers skimmed over the moles on his torso â marks Iâd memorized long ago. His breath hitched when I touched him, and for a moment, the raw vulnerability in his eyes was almost too much to bear.
I sat up, planting kisses near his naval and working my way upwards. He embraced me then, lifting us both and moving to a nearby chaise lounge so we could escape the unforgiving concrete beneath us.
The rain continued to fall, heavier now, soaking every inch of us as he settled me onto the lounge. He slipped my skirt off and wrapped my legs around him, tugging the waistband of his sweatpants down to reveal his hardened length. His eyes stayed locked on mine as he leaned down, capturing my lips in a kiss that was both tender and full of unspoken urgency.
The rain fell around us, creating a rhythm that matched the rising tension between our bodies. Nicholas pressed his forehead against mine, his hand sliding between us to guide himself to my entrance.
âSlow, please,â I whispered but still audible over the heavy patter of the rain.
Nicholas stilled, his dark eyes locked on mine as he nodded, the raw emotion in his gaze making my chest tighten. He shifted closer, his hands framing my face as if grounding himself. âSlow,â he repeated, his voice hoarse, reverent. âI promise, baby.â
His lips found mine again, softer this time, the urgency giving way to something deeper, more deliberate. I felt the tip of him press against me, a teasing pressure that sent a shiver down my spine. He groaned against my mouth, his hands trembling slightly as he moved with painstaking care, entering me inch by inch.
My breath hitched, my fingers clutching at his shoulders as the stretch filled me, the sensation overwhelming but perfect and everything I needed â what we needed. Nicholas buried his face in the crook of my neck, his breath warm against my rain-soaked skin as he whispered my name, over and over.
I gasped, my body arching into his as he pushed further, his movements slow and deliberate. His lips never left my skin, pressing soft, open-mouthed kisses along my neck, my collarbone, as if grounding himself in the moment. Each kiss was laced with quiet apologies, murmured words of regret and reassurance that made my heart ache and swell at the same time.
âIâm sorry, baby,â he whispered, his voice rough and trembling as he stilled inside me. His hands gripped my hips, anchoring us together. âIâm so fucking sorry for not fighting for you then, for now.â
Tears mingled with the rain on my face, my fingers threading through his wet hair as I pressed my lips to his temple. âIâm sorry, too,â I whispered back, my voice breaking.
Nicholas groaned softly, his hands trailing up my sides, brushing over my ribs as if trying to remind himself I was real, that we were here. I cupped his face, forcing him to look at me, to see the sincerity in my eyes.
His lips crashed into mine, the kiss tender but filled with a desperate need that made my heart race. Slowly, he began to move, his hips rolling against mine in a rhythm that was agonizingly slow, deliberate, and full of love. Each thrust was a reminder of everything weâd been through, every moment that had brought us to this point. It wasnât just physical â it was emotional, a reconnection of souls that had been lost in the chaos.
I clung to him, my nails digging into his shoulders as he filled me completely, his movements steady and unhurried. The rain soaked us to the bone, but it didnât matter. All that mattered was the way he made me feel â seen, cherished, loved in a way that words couldnât capture.
Nicholasâs forehead pressed against mine as his rhythm stayed slow, deliberate, and tender, his lips brushing against my temple as though grounding us in the moment. Each stroke sent a shiver through me, a soft gasp escaping my lips as I clung to him. The rain was relentless, but the cool droplets against my overheated skin only heightened every sensation.
âBaby,â he murmured against my ear, his voice raw with emotion, âDo you feel that? How much I fucking love you?â
I nodded, unable to form words, my hands trailing up his rain-slicked back to tangle in his hair. His pace remained torturous, each thrust measured and purposeful. His lips found mine again, soft and searching, and I felt the unspoken apologies in every kiss, the promises in every caress.
His lips claimed mine again, slow and deep, as though trying to pour every ounce of his love and regret into that single kiss. The world around us faded away, the storm intensifying as the rain fell even harder, soaking our bodies as we moved together.
Every roll of his hips, every kiss, every whispered word was a balm to the wounds weâd both carried for far too long. There was no urgency, no desperation â only the deliberate, unyielding connection between us. His hands roamed over my body, his fingers tracing patterns on my skin that made me tremble beneath him.
Our movements were unhurried, each touch, each kiss, deliberate, as though we were weaving the pieces of ourselves back together. Nicholas held me like I was something sacred, his hands cradling my face, his lips brushing over mine with a tenderness that made my chest ache. The rain continued to fall, the steady rhythm against the pool blending with our breaths, our sighs.
He whispered my name like a mantra, his voice thick with emotion. âI love you,â he murmured, his forehead pressing against mine as his hips moved against me in a rhythm that felt like poetry.
Tears blurred my vision. âI love you, too,â I whispered, the words spilling from my lips like a vow. âAlways.â
His pace quickened slightly, the pressure building between us as his movements became more purposeful, more insistent. The heat pooling in my core grew, spreading through my body like wildfire as he pushed me closer to the edge. Nicholasâs hand rested on the one I had curled around his hair, intertwining his fingers with mine and pinning my arm above my head.
His lips hovered just above mine, his breath mingling with mine as the rhythm of his hips grew firmer, more insistent. âYouâre so fucking beautiful like this,â he murmured, his voice thick and raw, every word vibrating through me. âI canât believe I almost lost you.â
âNicâŠâ I gasped, my voice trembling as my body arched beneath him, seeking more, craving everything he had to give. The rain poured down around us, the sound a backdrop to the symphony of our breaths, our moans, the quiet gasps that escaped every time he moved inside me.
A groan tore from his throat, his lips crashing against mine as if he couldnât stand the distance between us for another second. His tongue swept into my mouth, desperate and demanding, as his pace quickened, each thrust more deliberate, more consuming.
âFuck, (Y/N),â he growled against my lips, his voice ragged and trembling with restraint.
Nicholas pressed deeper, his grip on my hand tightening as he brought his other hand to my waist, holding me firmly beneath him. His movements grew more purposeful, each thrust sending a jolt of pleasure radiating through my entire body. His control was slipping, and I could feel the tension coiled within him, the sheer effort it took for him to keep his pace measured and deliberate.
âIâm yours,â he growled, his voice low and guttural, each word punctuated by the steady rhythm of his hips. âIâve always been yours, baby.â
I moaned in response, unable to form coherent words as he pushed me closer to the edge. The rain was relentless, soaking us both as it blurred the lines between where he ended and I began. My fingers curled into his hair, pulling him closer, needing him closer, as if the mere inches between us were unbearable.
Nicholas shifted, his weight pressing into me as he lifted my leg over his shoulder so he could hit deeper and reach that spongy spot inside me until I cried out. His lips moved to my neck, nipping and sucking at the sensitive skin.
âRight there, baby?â Nicholas growled against my neck, his voice thick with desire as his teeth grazed my skin.
âYes,â I gasped, my hands clutching at his damp shoulders, nails digging into his slick skin. âOh, my God, Nic. Donât stop.â
His hips snapped harder, the rhythm deliberate yet overwhelming as he drove into me again and again. The rain hammered down, but the heat between us only grew. Nicholas leaned back just enough to look into my eyes, his face intense and wild, water dripping down his sharp cheekbones.
âYou like it when I fuck you like this, baby?â he rasped, his free hand trailing down my waist to grip my thigh. âWhen I make you scream my name?â
âYes!â I cried out, my voice raw as my body arched beneath him. Every nerve in my body was alive, every touch, every word pushing me closer to the edge. âNic, Iâm so close.â
âIâve got you, baby,â he said through gritted teeth, his lips capturing mine in a brutal, possessive kiss. âI always do.â
My nails raked down his back as he thrust harder, deeper, each movement building the pressure inside me until it was unbearable. His growls mixed with my cries, the sound of our bodies moving together in the rain echoing into the night.
âI love watching you like this,â he whispered, his breath hot against my lips as he gazed down at me. âTaking me so perfectly. Fuck, youâre incredible.â
His words pushed me over the edge, my body tightening around him as I shattered. A scream tore from my lips, and he swallowed it with a searing kiss, his own movements growing erratic as he chased his release.
âBaby,â he groaned, his voice breaking as his hips jerked against mine. âFuck, Iâm gonnaââ
âDo it,â I gasped, pulling him closer, my legs tightening around him. âIâm yours, Nic. Always.â
With a guttural growl, he buried himself deep, his body shuddering as he spilled inside me, filling me completely. The tension in his shoulders melted away as he collapsed against me, his forehead resting against mine as he fought to catch his breath.
Nicholas wrapped his arms around me, holding me close as we lay tangled together on the lounge chair. For several minutes, neither of us moved, the rain cascading over us like a curtain, shielding us from the world outside as it refused to let up. The weight of everything â the fight, the lies, the media circus â seemed to fade, leaving only the steady rhythm of his breathing and the way his chest rose and fell against mine.
Nicholasâs hands traced gentle patterns along my back, his touch soothing as he pressed a lingering kiss to my damp forehead. âIâm not letting you go again,â he murmured, his voice low and resolute.
I tightened my grip around him, my fingers tracing the curve of his shoulder. âMe neither,â I whispered back. âNot this time.â
He pulled back just enough to look into my eyes, his dark gaze searching mine for any hint of doubt. Whatever he saw there must have reassured him because a soft, almost shy smile tugged at his lips â a glimpse of the Nicholas I had fallen in love with so many years ago.
âGood,â he said, his hand coming up to brush a strand of wet hair from my face. He rested his chin atop my head, his fingers trailing down my back in soothing strokes. âWe should probably get inside,â he said after a while, his voice tinged with reluctant amusement. âBefore we catch pneumonia.â
âFive more minutes,â I sighed, burying my face in his chest and hugging him tighter.
He chuckled softly, the sound rumbling through his chest. âSeriously, baby, youâre shivering.â
I hadnât even noticed until he mentioned it. The wind was beginning to pick up, and there was only so much warmth Nicholasâs body could provide in the weather. I nodded, reluctantly pulling away from him slightly. With a grunt, Nicholas pushed himself to his feet, lifting me with him. My legs felt unsteady beneath me, but his arms stayed wrapped securely around my waist, steadying me as he bent down to pick up our discarded clothes.
Nicholas draped his wet shirt over his shoulder and handed me my skirt and panties. I took them silently, my cheeks warming as the reality of what had just happened settled over me. I slipped my panties back on, the damp fabric clinging to me uncomfortably, and stepped into my skirt.
He shrugged on his wet shirt, the fabric clinging to his chest, and bent down to pick up my soaked blouse, carefully opening it by the collar so the fabric wouldnât drag on my hair as I slipped it on. His touch lingered on my arms for a moment, his dark eyes searching mine. I could see the softness there now, a quiet tenderness that made my chest ache.
Nicholasâs lips quirked into a half-smile, though his concern didnât waver. âCome on. Letâs get you inside before you freeze.â
He kept an arm wrapped around my waist as we made our way back toward the house, the rain continuing its relentless downpour. My shoes squelched against the wet stone path, and I winced at the uncomfortable sensation of cold fabric clinging to my legs.
âYou okay?â he asked, glancing down at me.
I let out a shaky laugh, wrapping my arms around myself. âIâll survive.â
Nicholasâs arm tightened around me, his body warm against my side despite the chill. âYouâre a trooper, baby. But next time? Weâre doing this somewhere dry.â
I laughed softly, the sound shaky but real, and leaned into him as we approached the door. We kicked off both of our shoes and socks, leaving them to dry outside.
Nicholas held the door open for me, his hand lingering on the small of my back as I stepped inside. The warmth of the house enveloped us immediately, and I let out a relieved sigh as the shivers that had wracked my body began to subside.The faint hum of the staffâs voices carried from the kitchen, but otherwise, the house was quiet.
The second we stepped inside, dripping wet and shivering from the rain, Mrs. Chavezâs voice cut through the air as she approached us from the kitchen. âMaria, grab some towels and clean clothes!â she called out, her tone brisk but not unkind. âOh, my god, you two look like a pair of drowned kittens,â she said as she took in our soaked clothes and disheveled appearances.
Maria appeared within a minute or two, thick, fluffy towels in one arm and clean clothes in the other.
âWhat in the world were you two doing out there?â Mrs. Chavez asked, her eyes wide.
He let out a soft chuckle, reaching for a towel and slinging one towel around his neck, âJust talking.â He grabbed the other towel, unfolding it and holding it open with both hands, and turned his attention to me. âHere, baby,â he spoke softly as he carefully patted my face dry before draping the towel over my back and proceeding to dry my arms.
I stood still, letting Nicholas dry me off, his touch tender and unhurried. He worked his way down my arms and over my shoulders, his brow furrowed in concentration as if this simple act was the most important thing in the world. The towel was warm and soft, a stark contrast to the icy fabric clinging to my skin.
Mrs. Chavezâs eyes lingered on the way Nicholasâs hand rested protectively against me. Her expression softened, and she let out a quiet sigh. There was a faint smile tugging at the corners of her lips, and I swore I saw a glimmer of relief in her eyes. âWell, I hope youâve managed to sort things out,â she said, her tone gentler now. âBut next time, perhaps consider talking indoors,â he sighed before walking off.
Maria smirked as she handed me some dry clothes. âHere, sweetheart. You two better warm up before you catch colds. Paolo has some soup on the stove if youâre hungry.â
âThanks, Maria,â I murmured, clutching the clothes to my chest.
Nicholas gently tugged on my damp blouse. âHere, let me help you.â
I hesitated, my cheeks flushing under Mariaâs watchful gaze, but she waved me off with a wink. âIâll give you two a minute,â she said, turning on her heel and disappearing back into the kitchen.
The room felt quieter without her, the hum of the rain outside the only sound as Nicholas carefully peeled off my wet blouse. His fingers brushed against my skin, and I shivered â not from the cold this time, but from the heat of his touch. His dark eyes stayed locked on mine, and I could see the unspoken emotions swirling in their depths â concern, affection, and something deeper that made my stomach flutter despite the chill.
âYou donât have to,â I murmured, clutching the dry clothes tighter against my chest.
âI want to,â he said softly, his voice low but firm. âYou slipped through my fingers once; Iâm not letting it happen again.â
The way he said it, so tender and unyielding, left me breathless. He reached for the dry shirt and slipped it over my head, his hands lingering at my waist as he adjusted the hem.
Nicholas crouched in front of me, his hands sliding down to hook themselves around the waistband of my skirt. He pulled it off with care, leaving me standing in just my damp panties. His eyes flicked up to mine, his dark gaze soft but intense.
âUnderwear, too?â he hummed.
I hesitated for a heartbeat, my cheeks burning under his gaze. But there was no judgment in his eyes â only concern and a quiet, unwavering devotion that made my heart ache. I looked around to see if anybody was lingering and nodded, my voice barely above a whisper. âYeah.â
Nicholasâs hands moved with deliberate care, his fingers brushing against my hips as he slid my soaked panties down my legs. The air between us felt charged, every movement laden with unspoken emotion. He kept his eyes on mine, his touch tender and unhurried, as if he were handling something fragile.
Once the damp fabric pooled around my ankles, he picked it up and placed it neatly with the rest of the wet clothes. He reached for the dry sweatpants Maria had provided. âStep in, baby.â
I placed a hand on his shoulder for balance, stepping into the sweatpants as he guided them up my legs, pulling the waistband up. His hands rested lightly on my hips, his thumbs brushing against the fabric as he stood, his face inches from mine. The warmth of the dry fabric against my skin was a welcome relief, but it was the quiet intimacy of the moment that left me breathless.
Nicholas reached out, tucking a strand of damp hair behind my ear. His touch lingered, his dark eyes searching mine. âIâll always take care of you,â he said, his voice low but steady. âYou know that, right?â
Tears prickled at the corners of my eyes, but I blinked them away, nodding as I placed a hand on his chest. âI know.â When he reached for the towel again to dry my hair, I stopped him with a light touch on his wrist. âYour turn,â I said, nodding toward his soaked shirt.
Nicholas smirked, a teasing glint in his eyes. âThatâs fair.â He peeled off the wet fabric, his muscles rippling with the motion, and my breath caught at the sight of him â the way the light coming from the chandelier above us highlighted every line and curve.
I reached for the towel heâd left draped around his neck, standing on my tiptoes to dry his hair. He bent slightly to make it easier for me, a playful grin tugging at his lips as I worked. âYouâre really getting into this, huh?â
I rolled my eyes, though I couldnât suppress the smile that tugged at my lips. âJust returning the favor.â
I moved the towel down to dry his arm and torso, carefully working as if I could undo the rainâs lingering touch. Nicholas stood perfectly still, letting me take my time, his dark eyes following my every move. There was a vulnerability in his expression, something unspoken but deeply felt that made my chest tighten.
I grabbed the spare shirt Maria had set aside for him, bunching it up to the collar and shrugging it over Nicholasâs head. As the soft fabric fell into place, I smoothed my hands over his chest, brushing away any wrinkles. Then, I proceed to tug down at his sweatpants, making sure to shield him with my body in case anybody walked in.
Nicholas chuckled softly as he rested his hands on my hips, steadying himself as I worked. His voice was warm and teasing, a soft contrast to the intensity of everything weâd just shared. âIf you wanted to undress me again, baby, all you had to do was ask,â he said as he stepped out of his wet bottoms and kicked them off to the side.
I rolled my eyes, trying to ignore the heat that rose in my cheeks. âIâm making sure you donât catch a cold,â I said matter-of-factly, though my voice trembled slightly.
I crouched down carefully, still wanting to keep Nicholas modest, and held the sweatpants open for him to step into. One leg at a time, he stepped into them. I quickly pulled them up and adjusted the waistband, my fingers lingering at his sides for a moment before stepping back.
His hands settled on my hips as I finished, his touch light but grounding. He looked at me for a moment, and I grew a little bit shy. âThank you,â he said quietly.
I smiled, a small, lopsided thing. âYouâre welcome.â
The playful glint in his eyes was replaced by something deeper, more serious. âYou know, Iâve spent nights thinking about this â us taking care of each other.â His voice dropped to a whisper, the weight of his words settling heavily between us. âI thought about what it would be like to have you like this. Not just for a moment, not just for a summer, but always. Waking up next to you. Taking care of you. Letting you take care of me.â
My breath hitched as I searched his eyes, the raw vulnerability in his gaze stealing the words from my lips. I wanted to tell him Iâd thought the same thing, dreamed of it, even in the moments when Iâd tried to convince myself it was impossible. But the lump in my throat made it impossible to speak.
âYouâre all Iâve ever wanted, (Y/N),â he continued, his thumb brushing softly against my hip. âI know I said that I would regret not going to Los Angeles, but I think my biggest regret was ever leaving you behind. And Iâm not doing that again. You hear me?â
Tears prickled at the corners of my eyes, but I blinked them away, my hands coming up to rest on his chest. His heart beat steady and strong beneath my palm, a rhythm that grounded me. âI hear you,â I whispered, my voice trembling with the weight of everything I couldnât say.
His jaw tightened, his dark eyes shining with an intensity that made my chest ache. âOkay,â he said softly, his hands sliding up to cup my face. âBecause youâre stuck with me now.â
I let out a watery laugh, the sound trembling but real as my hands gripped the front of his shirt as if to anchor myself to him. Nicholasâs lips found mine again, soft and deliberate, as though sealing our words with a kiss. It wasnât rushed or desperate â it was steady, full of quiet assurance and unspoken promises. The world around us seemed to fall away, leaving only the warmth of his touch and the steady rhythm of our breathing.
When he finally pulled back, his forehead resting against mine, the corners of his mouth tugged into a small, almost shy smile. He pulled me into his arms, his embrace warm and secure. For the first time in weeks, I felt a sense of peace, as though the storm that had raged between us was finally settling.
âLetâs get that soup,â he murmured after a moment, pressing a kiss to my hair.
I laughed softly against his chest, the sound shaky but genuine then smiled, letting him guide me toward the kitchen.
The rain continued to fall outside, but for the first time, it felt like it wasnât a storm but a fresh start, washing away everything that had come before. And with Nicholasâs hand warm in mine, I felt like maybe weâd finally found our way back to each other â for good.
#nicholas alexander chavez#nicholas alexander chavez x reader#nicholas chavez#nicholas chavez x fem!reader#nicholas alexander chavez fanfic#nicholas chavez smut#nicholas chavez x reader#nicholas alexander chavez imagine#nicholas alexander chavez fic#father charlie mayhew x reader#father charlie smut#father charlie mayhew#father charlie x reader#fic-o-meter
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YOU SHOULD'VE SEEN YOUR FACE | Sebastian Vettel
Sebastian Vettel x Pregnant Wife!Reader
SUMMARY: Seb's wife is pregnant, but she hasn't told him yet since she doesn't seem ready. However, after he almost crashed pretty badly during a Free Practice session, she can't help but tell him in not the best way possible âł REQUESTED BY ANON: Okay but can you imagine Sebs wife being pregnant but she has not told him yet. He does some dangerous and bold move on a drive and she gets mad and scared and just some fluff when he finds out :)
WORD COUNT: 1804
WARNINGS: Curse words, mentions of anxiety, overthinking about Formula 1 crashes (?), pregnancy, Ferrari Seb in general (if you know, you know)
TAGLIST: @hc-dutch @raavadakedavra @coffeedestroyingperson @evey-kuznetskova @bowielovesyou @chaoswithus @isotopemylove @iceman-kazansky @gwginnyweasley @formula1-motogpfan @herdetectivetheorist @myescapefromthislife @regalbanshee [in case you wanna be tagged just tell me so i can add you!]
VEE'S NOTES: Hi guys! Finally back to posting fics! This year I don't only want to write more, but also establish some kind of writing routine because I've been dealing with anxiety over Christmas for some personal problems family related and found out that I missed distressing with writing. Also, thank you so much for all the support you've been showing me lately! Appreciate it a lot since I wasn't feeling very comfortable with my writing. Let me know your thoughts on this one <3 âł MAKE YOUR REQUESTS | LET'S TALK! | JANUARY UPDATE CALENDAR
© VETTELSVEE (2025). please, do not steal, copy or translate my works. thanks for reading!
Despite being quite far from the pit lane, you could hear nothing but the deafening roar of the engines, the clatter of tools on Kimi's car, and the curses of the race engineers at the constant stunts Seb had decided to pull during the free practice session. Â
Your husband's red car seemed not just to race but to fly around the track. FP2 had started barely twenty minutes ago, but Seb had already come within inches of crashing into the walls far too many times after going off track more often than you could count. Â
You couldn't deny that you had loved watching Seb race ever since you met and you learned he was a driver in one of the most dangerous sports in the world. Today, however, luck was not on your side, and anxiety was consuming you. The nausea, uncontrollable on its own, felt even worse than usual. Not to mention, you felt on the verge of a panic attack. Â
"Are you okay?"Â Â
You turned at the sound of Riccardo Adamiâs voice, Sebâs race engineer. The Italian removed one side of his headset and covered the microphone to ensure the driver wouldnât hear anything. Â
"Yes, yes, of course," you replied hastily, forcing a smile and suppressing the urge to gag as you felt it rising in your throat. "Iâm just a bit more nervous than usual today, thatâs all."Â Â
"Seb knows what heâs doing. Donât worry about that."Â Â
You nodded, but as soon as Adami turned his attention back to his screen, you rolled your eyes and did the same. Â
"You know, sometimes he thinks that heâs a cat and has seven lives," you muttered under your breath. "Someone should remind him heâs in an actual Formula 1 car, not in a simulator."Â Â
"Donât worry, Iâll remind him in the post-session briefing," the engineer joked, flashing a smile before immersing himself back into Vettel's driving. Â
You didnât pay him much attention. Once again, you were entirely engrossed in both your husbandâs onboard camera and the telemetry, even though you didnât understand much aside from the fact that he was setting purple sectors, which was undoubtedly a good sign. Â
You didnât know much about the inner workings of the cars, but after so many years with Seb, you knew that the faster his times were, the higher the risks became. Â
You were also acutely aware that your husband was pushing himself too hard in those moments. Â
You began to tremble slightly, fidgeting with your hands in an attempt to calm your anxiety, but it didnât work. Instinctively, and trying not to draw much attention, you placed your hands on your belly and prayed that your child wouldnât give you any scares like his father was giving you. Â
"Sector two in purple as well, Seb!"Â Â
Even though the garage erupted into cheers and applause, you remained motionless. Instead, you couldnât take your eyes off the screen, which now showed your husbandâs car in full view. Â
Your panic peaked the moment Seb lost control of the rear of his car and went off the track. You swore that if it hadnât been for the sudden braking, he would have ended up in the barriers with a wrecked car and himself heading to the medical center because the crash would have likely exceeded the G-force limits. Â
When Seb didnât respond immediately, your heart stopped. Â
"Iâm fine, Iâm fine..." Seb finally said in a disappointed tone. "But I canât say the same for the car. I think itâs more damaged than it looks."Â Â
"Can you bring it back, Sebastian?" Riccardo asked in a tone that was a mix of irritation and disappointment. Â
"Yeah, no problem. Coming back. Sorry, guys."Â Â
Just as no one on the team said anything to you, you, who had forced yourself to sit down because your legs were trembling too much and you felt dizzy, also remained silent until your husband returned and got out of the car. Â
Seb removed his helmet, revealing an expression that was hard to decipher. You stood up carefully and approached him, trying to keep your composure. Without giving him a chance to say anything, you grabbed his hand and led him toward his driver room, ignoring Britta's protests to talk after interviews were done. Â
"It could have been worse, right?"Â
Sebastian closed the door behind him and turned to face you. You stood there with your arms crossed, visibly upset. Your glare alone was enough to tell Seb he was seconds away from one of your infamous scoldings. Â
The problem? He had no idea why. You had never acted so strangely over something as common as a collision during a race weekend. Â
âWhat the hell is wrong with you?!â you exploded, your voice filled with frustration. âFuck, Seb, can you explain what that was all about?!â Â
âWhat do you mean, what was that? I was... racing, like I always do, babe,â he replied cautiously, still clueless about what he'd done wrong. Â
You, however, didnât know what was bothering you more: your husbandâs calm demeanor or the sight of a few Ferrari team members peeking through the window to catch the drama unfolding between the two of you. Â
âYou were so close to slamming into a wall, Sebastian, thatâs what happened!â you shot back, yanking the curtains shut and flipping off the nosy onlookers. âAre you out of your mind or what?!â Â
âCome on, love, I had it under control. What you saw on the onboard mightâve looked bad, but I swear it wasnât as dangerous as it seemed.â Â
âNot as bad as it seemed? Are you seriously telling me that?â you retorted, your voice trembling with anger. âDo you think driving is just like playing a video game now? Do you have any idea what it wouldâve meant if you hadnât reacted in time? Do you know what it wouldâve meant for me and forââ Â
You stopped yourself mid-sentence, refusing to continue. Â
You knew your emotions were running wild because of your pregnancy hormones, but you forced yourself to calm down. Getting so worked up would only lead to a pointless argument with Seb and wasnât good for you or the baby. Â
âFor who, Y/N?â Seb asked, stepping closer and gently taking your hands in his. Â
âFor... me! Who else?â you replied quickly.Â
Sebastian didnât know how to respond. Heâd never seen you so distressed about his racing, and while he tried to stay calm, inside he was battling a storm of worry and confusion. Â
âThis stress isnât good for me or for the situation you and, well... youâve gotten me into,â you said, your voice cracking. Â
âY/N, babe, I swear I have no idea what youâre talking about. Fuck, Iâm pretty worried about you right now with all this shit, but if you donât tell me whatâs going onââ Â
âDamn it, Seb! Iâm pregnant!â Â
You looked down, tears streaming down your face. You clenched your fists tightly, furious at yourself for revealing such big news in such an emotional, unplanned way. Â
Sebastian, meanwhile, stood frozen, his eyes wide in shock at the unexpected news. Slowly, everything started to make sense: your morning sickness, falling asleep all the time, constantly complaining about being tired, and the flimsy excuses you gave for not drinking wine, something you normally loved. Â
He cursed himself for not realizing it sooner and for believing your weak justifications about bad leftovers being the cause of everything. Â
âYouâre... pregnant?â His voice was barely audible, almost afraid to say the words out loud because they didnât feel real. Â
You wiped your tears and sniffled, doing your best to meet your husbandâs gaze without feeling ashamed. Â
âYes...â you said timidly. âI wanted to tell you in a special way... you know, by giving you a baby onesie in a box with the positive pregnancy test inside, but...â You shook your head and finally looked him in the eyes. âI thought you were going to die out there today and leave your child and me alone. The thought of losing you, now of all times, just...â Â
âYouâre really pregnant? Weâre going to have a baby?â Â
You nodded, and Seb couldnât hold back his tears. He pulled you into a tight embrace and began kissing you tenderly. You melted into his arms, feeling an immense weight lifted from your shoulders. Â
âI didnât know how to tell you,â you admitted. âI swear I wanted it to be special, but seeing you out there today, thinking something could happen to you...â Your voice broke again. âI was terrified, Seb, like never before watching you race.â Â
âIâm so sorry, love. I really am,â he said sincerely, cupping your cheeks gently and kissing you over and over. âIf Iâd known, I wouldâve been more careful. God, love, this is incredible... This is the best news Iâve ever received.â Â
âYouâre not mad that I didnât tell you sooner? You shouldâve seen your face earlier...â Â
âMad? That you didnât tell me sooner?â You shrugged, your insecurity showing despite your years together. Seb tilted his head, understanding this was one of your rare but extreme moments of doubt. âIâm just... in shock. I canât believe weâre going to be parents...â Â
Sebastian hesitantly touched your stomach, and you burst into fresh tears at the tenderness of his gesture. Â
âNow you have to promise me something, Seb,â you said, playing with his hair as he knelt before you, leaving kisses on your belly. Â
âAnything for you and our little one.â Â
âYou need to be more careful from now on. Stop thinking so much with your adrenaline and testosterone, and start using your brain more,â you said, trying not to sound too harsh. âI know Formula 1 and racing is your whole life, but I donât want you risking it when weâre bringing a new one into the world. Iâm eight weeks along, and we still have 32 to go assuming everything follows the perfect pregnancy script.â Â
Seb stood and gazed at you, trying to convey the calm you both could only find in each other. Â
âLove, I promise,â he whispered softly. âFor you, for the baby... I love winning, but today, and even more so when our child is born, Iâll have won the second most important race of my life.â Â
You frowned, confused. Â
âIf thatâs the second, whatâs the most important race of your life then?â Â
He chuckled and scooped you into his arms, kissing you again as he laid you both on the couch behind you. Â
âThe race I ran for so many years to win your heart,â he murmured between slow, deliberate kisses that said more than words ever could. âAfter all those years trying to get you to go out with me in high school, and now weâre eight months away from having a baby... what else could it be, mama?â Â
#formula 1#f1#sebastian vettel#f1 x reader#formula 1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#formula 1 x female reader#formula 1 x you#formula 1 x y/n#f1 x female reader#f1 x y/n#f1 x you#formula 1 fluff#f1 fluff#sebastian vettel one shot#sebastian vettel x y/n#sebastian vettel imagine#sebastian vettel x reader#sebastian vettel fanfic#sebastian vettel fluff#ferrari#sebastian vettel fic#formula 1 imagine#f1 imagine#sebastian vettel f1#sebastian vettel x female reader#sebastian vettel x you#ferrari seb#sebastian vettel angst
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Hello, happy holidays! May I ask for scarabia, with number 5 and hurt/comfort! :D
i cannot come up with good titles please ignore how cringe they are
Beyond Compare || Kalim Al-Asim
For the Holiday Event! || Prompt: "It's always been you" ; Genre: Hurt/Comfort
The Golden Hour painted Scarabiaâs halls in soft, warm light, but the mood was anything but tranquil. You were pacing back and forth, trying to keep your temper in check while Kalim watched, his expression somewhere between concerned and obliviously cheerful.
âYouâve been doing it again, Kalim,â you finally said, stopping mid-step to face him.
âDoing what?â he asked, tilting his head with the kind of innocent curiosity that only Kalim could manage.
âTrying to set me up with Jamil,â you clarified, crossing your arms. âDo you not see how weird that is?â
âOh!â His eyes lit up like heâd just remembered something important. âBut Jamilâs so dependable! Heâs smart, responsible, andââ
âAnd not the person I like,â you interrupted, your voice sharper than intended.
Kalim blinked at you, his smile faltering. â...Heâs not?â
âNo, Kalim,â you said, exhaling deeply. âHeâs not. You are.â
For a moment, he just stared at you, his usual radiance dimmed by pure confusion. âMe?â he asked, his voice quiet and tentative, as if he couldnât quite believe what he was hearing.
âYes, you,â you said, stepping closer to him. âIt has always been you, Kalim.â
His eyes widened, the realization hitting him like a tidal wave. But instead of celebrating, his brows furrowed, and he glanced away. âI just⊠I thought Jamil would be better for you. Heâs got everything together, and IâŠâ He trailed off, his usual energy replaced with rare self-doubt.
âKalim,â you said gently, reaching to cup his face and forcing him to meet your gaze. âI donât care about all that. I care about you. Your kindness, your laughter, the way you make me feel like the world is a brighter place just because youâre in it.â
His cheeks flushed a deep red, and he opened his mouth to respond, but no words came out. So, instead, you leaned forward and kissed himâa sweet, soft kiss meant to convey everything you felt.
When you pulled back, his face was practically glowing, his expression equal parts elated and stunned.
âItâll always be you, Kalim,â you whispered.
Finally finding his voice, he broke into the biggest, most radiant smile youâd ever seen. âReally?!â he asked, his tone full of disbelief and joy.
âReally,â you confirmed, laughing at how adorable he looked.
He threw his arms around you, nearly lifting you off the ground in his excitement. âYou have no idea how happy that makes me!â he said, his usual exuberance back in full force. âI was so worried youâd think I wasnât enough for you!â
âYouâre more than enough,â you assured him, wrapping your arms around his neck.
His smile softened into something more tender, his crimson eyes sparkling with affection. âIâll make you the happiest person in the world, I promise.â
âYou already do, Kalim,â you said, resting your forehead against his.
In that moment, you could tell he believed youâand the love shining in his eyes was all the proof you needed that youâd made the right choice.
Masterlist
#twst#twst x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#twisted wonderland#kalim x reader#kalim al asim x reader#twst kalim#kalim al asim#kalim#đ àŁȘË ÖŽÖ¶Öžđ holiday event
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how would be the first time with arcane characters x fem reader (nsfw)
characters: viktor, jinx, vi, caitlyn, jayce, ekko, silco, mel and sevika.
writer's note: hi guys, this took me longer than it should have but it's finally ready and i'm pretty happy with the result. some smuts are more explicit than others, and not for any particular reason, it's just how my inspiration flowed and how i imagine the dynamic with each character's personality. as you already know request are open ;)
The room is bathed in the soft light of a lamp on Viktor's desk, barely enough to illuminate the blueprints scattered across the table. But this time, there are no scientific projects demanding his attention, only you. Viktor is sitting on the edge of the bed, his honey-colored eyes watching you with a mix of nervousness and tenderness.
Viktor
"Are you sure you want to do this with me?" he asks in a low voice, almost a whisper, as his trembling hand caresses your cheek. You can feel the warmth in his touch, a warmth that contrasts with his usually reserved exterior. Viktor has always been so cautious, so focused on his work, that this moment feels as if time has stopped for the two of you.
You nod softly, but the knot in your stomach is inescapable. "Thereâs nothing I want more. I want to take this step. Weâve been together for four months, I think weâve waited long enough."
However, the words taste half-hearted, and your mind starts filling with doubts. You bite your lower lip, the weight of a secret you've carried for years pressing against your chest. Should you tell him? Will it change anything between you if you do? A small voice inside you whispers that he may not understand, that he could see you differently.
The silence stretches, and you feel heat rising to your cheeks. "Viktor, there's something I need to tell you before... before we do this," you begin, your voice barely a murmur. You take a second, looking at your hands intertwined in your lap. "Iâve never⊠Iâve never done this before."
Lifting your gaze just a little, you see the confusion on his face, but thereâs no judgment, only patience. You take a breath and continue, even lower, as if saying it aloud was a confirmation you've avoided for years. "Iâm still a virgin."
The last word comes out as a whisper, and you wish you could hide from the vulnerability you just showed. You were twenty-seven and hadnât had sex, hadnât even thought about it. It had never been a priority in your life. But now that you were with Viktor, it was one of the things you couldnât stop thinking about. You look away, your fingers nervously playing with a fold in your clothing. "I know itâs unusual for my age. I always thought... it should have happened before, but it just never did. Itâs a bit embarrassing."
The room fills with a heavy silence, and you fear what Viktor might think. But then, his warm hand envelops yours, stopping your nervous movements. "You donât have to feel embarrassed," he says with a tenderness that makes your heart relax a little. "Experience doesnât define the value of a moment like this."
You look at him and find his eyes full of understanding. "I donât have much experience either," he admits softly, a small blush appearing on his cheeks. "Iâve always been so immersed in my work that⊠I never had time for these things."
Your lips curve into a small smile at his words, finding comfort in the shared sincerity. Viktor has always been someone you can trust, and this moment is no different. You felt so comfortable.
"But," he adds, gently squeezing your hands, "Iâll do my best. I want this moment to be special for both of us."
A wave of emotion envelops you, dispelling the embarrassment and replacing it with something deeper: trust. Viktor, always so considerate, makes you feel safe, loved, and it is in this space of mutual vulnerability that you find the courage to move forward.
His lips meet yours again, this time with more intention. The kiss is slow, laden with silent promises and desires that have been waiting to be explored. Viktorâs hands slide over your body with a mix of curiosity and reverence, stopping to feel every curve, every line.
You do the same, letting your fingers explore his body, acknowledging the delicacy of his movements, the firmness of his chest under your hands. Every caress is a discovery, a reaffirmation of the connection you both share.
"Letâs take it slow," he whispers against your lips, his voice soft and reassuring. "I want us both to feel comfortable."
You nod, feeling more confident with every passing second. He removes your blouse, leaving you in your bra, leaning in to plant a soft kiss on your collarbone, savoring the smoothness of your skin. His fingers worked quickly, almost desperately, on the clasp of the garment.
"I didnât know you were so skilled at this," you confessed with a nervous giggle as you felt the usual freedom in your chest, the straps falling but still covering your breasts, only to be uncovered by a gesture from Viktor, a gesture with a grace that could only be characteristic of him.
Viktor brushed the hair covering your right ear aside, leaned in, and whispered with his marked accent, "I work with machines, my dear, Iâm especially agile with my hands."
Those words filled you with courage, and you threw yourself into kissing him, your bare breasts rubbing against the covered skin of his chest. You moved your hips frenetically, your body begging for more, pleading for that unknown pleasure you were dying to experience. You wanted to taste that forbidden fruit exclusively from Viktor's hand.
With Viktor, everything was slow, full of meaning, every touch, every whisper, a promise of eternal love. Both naked in bed. The movements become more intimate, more laden with desire. You feel his warm breath on your neck, his hands finding places that make your skin tingle, your heart race faster.
And when you finally cross that line together, itâs with a mix of awe and love, discovering that experience doesnât define how special a moment can be, but the person with whom you share it.
"Do you dare to follow me?" Jinx asks, almost as if she isn't posing a question but throwing down a challenge. Her voice is playful, but there's something in her gaze that lets you know things could get much more intense than they seem.
Jinx
The sound of metal clashing against concrete is the only thing filling the air. The lights of Zaun flicker in the distance, creating an atmosphere that feels as electric as the chaos dwelling in Jinx's heart. You're there, standing in front of her, the adrenaline still coursing through your veins after a night of mischief and shared laughter. Her laugh, like her energy, is unpredictable, dangerous, and so contagious that you can't help but smile every time she looks at you with those bright blue eyes, filled with fun and madness. The kind of madness that takes your breath away and makes you crave more and more.
You nod, feeling your body tense with anticipation. This isn't the first time you've been close to her, but it is the first time the air feels charged with something different. The atmosphere, the closeness of her body, the way she subtly touches you while questioning everything you've done wrong in your life... it all gives you the sense that this is a point of no return.
You're nervous, but the thrill of being with Jinx, that unpredictable and uninhibited girl, quickly dissipates any trace of fear. Jinx is a whirlwind, and though you know you could lose yourself in her, you also feel there's something deeper, something you've never seen in anyone else.
Jinx moves closer, her mischievous smile never fading as she gently takes your hand. "Let's do it, toots," she says with that spark in her eyes that always drives you crazy. "This will be the most fun ride of your life."
The kiss comes unexpectedly, but perfectly. Her lips are a clash of energy, warm, quick, impetuous. You're surprised at how tender her touches can be, despite being so chaotic in everything else. Her hands explore your body with a mix of curiosity and desire, as if she's trying to disassemble you playfully. One of her hands slips under your skirt and brushes against your clit with her index finger, as if testing you, wanting to see your reaction, wanting to have fun with you.
A gasp of surprise is enough to make her laugh and move faster; before you know it, she has three fingers working inside you. You didn't even have time to think, and that's exactly what you shouldn't do with Jinx. With Jinx, you just have to relax and not fill your head with unnecessary thoughts. With Jinx, you just have to accept her and not question her actions.
And that's why you didn't utter a word when she bit one of your nipples hard enough to make you scream. She was pushing you to the limit, her fingers never stopping, never ceasing to stimulate you.
Your eyes rolled back from the pleasure, that mischievous, incoherent pleasure. Your first orgasm came without warning, juices running down Jinx's fingers like a broken fountain. The second followed, feeling like stepping on cool sand on an early morning beach, refreshing and necessary. After that, you lost count. You knew nothing anymore. You were just aware that you were enjoying it as if the world were ending tomorrow.
"Tell me I'm the best, tell me no one has ever made you feel as much as I have," Jinx whispered against your neck, covered in hickeys and bruises.
You tried to focus your blurry vision on Jinx, and in her eyes, there was a fragile layer of vulnerability that you could barely grasp but knew was there.
You took her face in your hands and kissed her with much saliva and a lot of uncoordinated passion, something that made the moment even more exciting. Because it was a kiss born from your instincts, from the vulnerability of your being, and the best part was that it hadn't been perfect. It was real and authentic, like your love for her.
"You are. No one has ever made me come so many times in a row. You're incredible, sweets," you admitted between breathless gasps, your body still sensitive but arching for more.
"I knew it, I'm the best," she patted herself on the shoulder, proud of herself.
You couldn't help but laugh, the tension in your body easing a bit. Jinx had a way of making what should be uncomfortable into something liberating, something you had never experienced before.
"Well, get ready, toots. This is just the beginning," she promised, going back to attacking your overstimulated clit.
Her lips trailed down your neck, and you felt how her body responded to yours with an urgency that made you feel alive in a way you never imagined.
From there, the night was filled with tender moments, sincere connections, and a vulnerability you only shared with her.
You and Vi in your room, she had sneaked through one of the windows in the middle of the night. And her excuse for waking you up in such an overwhelming and unexpected way, was that she missed you. And you couldn't scold her, you couldn't question her for her impulsive action because you missed her just the same. And you didn't say anything when she snuck under your sheets and started eating your pussy hungrily.
Vi
Her strong arms kept your trembling legs apart, her hair tickled your belly and her tongue, oh god, her tongue was so deep inside you. She was so dedicated to her task, she was trying her best, enjoying every lick. The air in the room was filled with the obscene sounds of her tongue and your muffled moans.
Every now and then you would bend your torso to get closer to her, but Vi would quickly push you back again, immobilizing you with her hand on your neck. She didn't want you to distract her, she didn't want you to interrupt her.
Even then you wanted to tease her, you wanted her eyes to look at you. You needed it. You'd always had a dangerous fixation on her attention.
"Did you really get past the security guards and climb up to my window for this? You must have really missed me." You commented in a mocking, almost contemptuous tone.
And you succeeded, her intense gaze now locked on your face. She pulled away from your pussy for a moment to talk to you.
"From down here it doesn't seem like it bothered you much," She bit the inside of your thighs, an area so sensitive it made you moan louder than you should.
She teased you and went back to her arduous task. And you, you were going crazy, it was the first time you two had done something like this. And it wasn't even half as good as you had imagined. It was much better. You could easily tell she was an expert, she knows where, how and where to touch to make you see stars in a clear sky.
âWhy are you so sweet?â Vi panted into your pussy, sucking your clit between her lips and making light circular motions with her tongue. You were going to lose your mind if she kept this up.
You leaned down and the straps of your dress fell down, one of your breasts was exposed and Vi didnât hesitate to take it in her hard hand to squeeze it.
âDonât say things like that,â You squirmed into her touch, your hips moving forward as she moved away from your private part.
âOh, are you embarrassed, little deer?â She said, her typical cheeky smile coming to the surface. âYou donât have to, youâre gorgeous and delicious.â You were going to complain, but you felt two of her fingers enter your hole and all rational thought went out the window.
âFuck, Vi,â You panted as her fingers twisted around inside you, touching parts you didnât even know existed or that would feel this good.
Vi licked her lips, tasting you, and squeezed your neck tighter.
"Shut up, we can't let your parents hear us," Her comment made a kind of glint appear in your eyes that she didn't miss. "Or do you want us to be discovered? What a dirty girl!" Her voice has that playful mockery, that challenging tone that always makes you laugh, but also makes you a little nervous.
"No... that's not true," you answer, your words now much more uninhibited. But your voice trembles a little, betraying the confidence you try to show.
"Don't lie to me, you liked the idea," Vi pulled you closer, pulling your hair with the hand that previously held your neck. "Your pussy squeezed my fingers." She whispered on your lips, teasing and humiliating you.
You tried to deny it again, but it felt so good, you loved that she treated you so roughly. That she wasn't careful with you. That she didn't worry about hurting you. Because she knew just what to do and what not to do. Vi was fucking perfect for you, and you were fucking perfect for her.
"I don't blame you, the image is morbid. The little girl from home who doesn't break a plate being ravished by the dirty and rude criminal from Zaun. That's what your prissy parents would think. They'd think I forced you, that I'm forcing you into this. Ironic, right?" The tone of her voice is brazen, almost defiant, but there's something else in her words that makes you blush. Is she challenging you? Is she provoking you? What does all this mean? You feel trapped in her gaze, that intensity that always accompanies it, as imposing as the sound of his fists hitting a punching bag.
And the intensity of her caresses didn't cease, they only increased in magnitude more and more, you didn't know how much more you could take.
"I would love to see their surprised faces when they see the reality, that their good little girl is a fucking bitch hungry for my fingers," her hot breath on your skin feels like a touch of fire.
âShut up,â you barked, a knot forming in your stomach.
"Why? You're getting wetter, you're enjoying this too much," Vi teases you, continuing to penetrate you, taking you to the edge.
And finally you came. You could feel the energy in your body vibrating with the same intensity as your soul moved. It was magical. Everything around you, all you can think about, is her.
Vi didn't waste the opportunity and she went back down to your pussy, feeding on every drop of your orgasm.
"Shit," You cursed under your breath as you watched her.
When she finished she stood up with a triumphant smile, the back of her right hand wiping away the fluid left on her chin. The confidence in her voice and in her actions melts you inside. Despite her defiant attitude, there's something deeply protective in the way she takes you, in how she guides your every move with a mix of dominance and care. There are no doubts, no insecurities when you're with Vi, and you realize that even though your nervousness almost paralyzed you at first, now you just feel the need to be closer to her.
"Thanks, little deer. I was thirsty," She winked at you and laid down next to you.
She closed her eyes and held you close, falling asleep as if nothing had happened, as if she hadn't just given you the best orgasm in the world.
That night, everything seemed to be aligned: the fresh air of Piltover, the soft light of the stars, and the closeness between the two of you. You had gone to deliver a report, one thing had led to another, and now you were kissing as if your lives depended on it.
Caitlyn
You clung to her body like a magnet, not wanting to let her go; finally, your greatest dream was coming true. Since you joined the Enforcers, you had been attracted to Caitlyn, and not just because of her impressive physique and British accent. Everything about Caitlyn is serene, controlled, perfect. Itâs hard not to admire the calm with which she moves through the world, with her well-mannered ways and always upright posture, almost like an unbreakable force. But in that same stillness, thereâs something that draws you in, something that makes you want to know what lies behind her façade.
Caitlyn stopped the kiss, her hand holding your jaw in a dominant yet gentle manner. Her dark navy blue hair was tousled thanks to your restless hands, and she was catching her breath. She looked incredibly beautiful. You didnât think youâd ever seen such a perfect human being.
The sound of the wind is the only witness to whatâs about to happen. Caitlyn is there, right in front of you, her gaze fixed on yours, deep and penetrating.
"I think what we're doing is a bit... out of the ordinary, isn't it?" Caitlyn says, her voice soft, but with a tone that makes you feel like sheâs watching your every move.
âYes, maâam,â you reply, nervousness pulsing through your veins, but you canât look away from her. Thereâs something in her calm that soothes you, but it also challenges you. The fact that she looks at you that way, almost as if sheâs expecting something, makes you feel a whirlwind of emotions you donât know how to handle.
Caitlyn takes a step towards you, just enough for you to feel the warmth of her body near yours. She observes you in silence, as if sheâs evaluating every small change in your expression. âI think itâs a bit much to call me that after what just happened. Call me Cait.â
And in that moment, you felt like you melted.
âCait,â the way your tongue savored her name was timid and tender, like testing if you werenât doing something wrong, but a half-smile from her confirmed the opposite.
She was your superior; it hadnât been wise of you to steal a kiss, a kiss that she reciprocated, but you didnât know if she might punish you for it. She could throw you out of the Enforcers or, much worse, ignore you and treat you with discomfort. Doubts were eating you alive. The fear of having done something stupid was tormenting you over and over.
âListen carefully. Through the physical contact we shared a few minutes ago, I think itâs quite noticeable that we feel a mutual attraction,â she made a small pause, and your heart almost jumped out of your chest. âHowever, we cannot let it affect us in the workplace. Do you think you can separate the two?â she asks, and although her tone is calm, thereâs a glimmer of something more in her gaze, something deeper.
You found yourself nodding pathetically fast, like an addict when offered their favorite drug.
She smiles slightly, a soft but confident smile, as if she knows whatâs about to happen is inevitable. Suddenly, her hands touch your face gently, as if itâs the most natural thing in the world. The contact is electric, and though her touch is soft, thereâs a strength in it that makes you feel exposed, vulnerable in a way you hadnât experienced before.
âDonât worry, darling,â Caitlyn whispers, slowly leaning in. âIâll take care of you.â
And with those words, her lips touch yours once more, softly at first, but it doesnât take long for it to intensify. The gentleness gave way to a burning desire both of you had been holding back. She quickly removed your uniform, amid passionate and sweet kisses, pushing you onto her bed. She gets on top of you, observing your naked figure, a look of approval crossing her face, and at that moment, you felt like the happiest person in the world.
Her hands, firm but delicate, trace your body, exploring every corner with a precision that leaves you breathless. Itâs the perfect contrast: her external calm and the intensity that emanates from her touch.
Every movement of Caitlyn is calculated, but also filled with an emotional connection that captures you. Thereâs no rush, no fear, just a desire to be close, to discover what both of you can offer in this moment. She knows how to make you feel special, how to make your body respond to her touch, how to provoke a fire inside you with just a glance.
In an instant, you are completely lost in her, in her tenderness, in her strength. Caitlyn is not like the others. The way she touches you is not just physical but reaches your soul, as if she is baring your heart while pushing you beyond your own limits. Every sigh, every brush of her skin against yours, is a promise that thereâs nothing she cannot expect from you, but also that thereâs nothing you should fear while sheâs by your side.
When she finally stops, her gaze meets yours, filled with desire but also with something much deeper. Caitlyn doesnât need to say anything else. You understand everything in her eyes: this is a beginning, not an end, and what happens between the two of you will only build on trust, passion, and something much more genuine than just physical desire.
âIâd love to see how far you could go if you let yourself go,â Caitlyn murmurs, with a subtle smile that makes you blush, but at the same time makes you feel like the only person in the world to her. âDo you want to let yourself go?â
Once again, you didnât hesitate to nod. You almost protested when she got up; you had already gotten used to the weight of her body, her hands on your skin, her eyes on yours. But curiosity formed when you saw her rummaging through the cabinet beside the bed, your eyes widened when you saw her walking back to you with a black dildo.
Everything was so surreal, you had so many nerves, so many questions, so many doubts, but it all vanished when Caitlyn's fingers danced along the smooth, curved surface of the dildo, teasing you with the promise of whatâs to come. Her touch sends shivers of anticipation racing up your spine as she brings the toy to her lips, her tongue flicking out to moisten the tip. Caitlyn's eyes, darkened with lust, never leave yours as she traces the contours of her mouth along the length, her breath hot and heavy against the cool silicone.
"Let's get you nice and ready," Caitlyn purrs, her voice low and sultry. She takes your hand, guiding it to the base of the dildo, letting your fingers explore the textured surface. The weight of it, the solidity, is a thrilling reminder of the pleasure that awaits you.
Caitlyn's fingers curl around yours, both of your hands now wrapped around the thick shaft. Together, you slowly inch the toy between your legs, the head nudging against your inner thigh. The first touch against your most intimate place sends a gasp tumbling from your lips, your hips instinctively canting forward.
Everything was a madness, a kaleidoscope of sensations and feelings.
"Feel how wet you are," Caitlyn whispers, her thumb circling your clit with a feather-light touch. Your arousal coats the toy, making the glide easier as inch by inch, Caitlyn slowly pushes it inside you. The stretch, the fullness, is exquisite, your walls yielding to accommodate the girth.
Caitlyn sets a steady rhythm, the toy sliding in and out of you with practiced ease. Each thrust sends a fresh wave of pleasure coursing through you, your body trembling and shaking. The obscene sound of the dildo plunging in and out of your dripping sex fills the room, mingling with your wanton moans and cries.
She picks up the pace, the toy driving deeper, hitting that spot inside you that makes your vision go white. Your cries grow louder, more urgent, as the first stirrings of your orgasm begin to build. Caitlyn's free hand finds your breast, kneading the soft flesh, her thumb and forefinger pinching and rolling your nipple.
It was too much, too much, you couldn't take it anymore. The woman of your dreams was fucking you with a damn dildo in her fucking room. You thought you were dreaming. Hallucinating.
"Come on, darling, let it go. You deserve it, youâve been a good girl," Caitlyn whispered in her marked accent, and you didnât need anything more to let it flow.
Caitlyn held you for a moment longer, her hand resting gently on your back. Both shared a brief sigh, allowing the calm to fill the space between you.
"Are you okay?" she asked with a slight smile, her voice soft but firm.
You nodded, taking a deep breath and feeling the tension slowly dissipate. Caitlyn moved back a bit, giving you your space, but her gaze remained attentive, as it always did.
"Thank you," you whispered, feeling a bit lighter.
Caitlyn turned towards you, intending to ask why exactly you were thanking her, but stopped when she saw you already asleep in her bed, your breathing calm and relaxed. A soft smile formed on her lips as she watched you for a moment, appreciating the serenity on your face.
Without making any noise, she got up and took the report you had brought her. She sat on a nearby chair and, with the same calm she had shown you, began inspecting the documents, letting you rest in peace while she worked in silence.
Jayce's office is impressive, filled with blueprints and artifacts that reveal his brilliant and ambitious mind. You're there, beside his desk, watching him move, standing by the window, unaware of the way you look at him. There's something about his posture, something about the way he speaks with such confidence, that makes you feel an undeniable attraction.
Jayce
But you know, you've noticed for a while: there's something about him that calls to you beyond the professional. You move closer, silently, but somehow your steps resonate in the air of the office.
"Have you finished the meeting?" you ask, your voice soft but with a clarity that makes him turn towards you. Jayce looks at you, and for a moment, everything seems to stop.
"Yes, I have," he responds, but something in his tone sounds more relaxed than usual. The look he gives you is inquisitive, but also something more. He lets you know with a smile that hides a slight challenge. "Is there anything else you need?"
Without warning, you move closer, the space between the two of you narrowing. He doesn't say anything, but you can see the surprise in his eyes when you stand right in front of him, your fingers lightly touching his chest. The air becomes dense, heavy, as if you're waiting for him to say something.
But you take the initiative. You place a hand on his neck, forcing his gaze to yours. "Yes, actually... there is something I need," you say, and the way you say it makes him fall silent. The tone of your voice is firm, but it's charged with palpable electricity, something both of you can feel.
Jayce stays still, but you can see he's tense, slightly surprised by what you're doing, as if he's not used to someone taking control in a situation like this. But it's not like he's upset, rather, he seems to be waiting for you to continue with what you have in mind.
The hand that was on his neck now slowly moves down, sliding over his chest until it reaches his waist, delving into his pants. The touch is soft, yet confident. Your fingers touch his semi-hard cock, feeling how his breathing quickens.
"And that, Jayce, is for you to stop for a second and listen to me," you say, and with a smile that's part challenge, part promise.
Jayce is left speechless, but he plays along, letting you lead him to the edge of the desk. You have his full attention now, and the way he looks at you, the way he seems to be waiting for each of your moves, makes you feel incredibly powerful. He, the great leader of Piltover, is now in your hands, and you know it.
Without taking your eyes off him, you lower yourself to his lower part, maneuvering to unbutton his pants. And when you succeed, you sigh with joy, his impressive length bouncing against your face, ready for you.
You look directly into his eyes, seeing a slight tension form on his face, but there's also something else: desire. A desire hidden beneath his facade of power and control.
"I've seen you very stressed lately, and I don't like seeing that pretty face full of wrinkles. I'm going to make you feel good, my fellow" you whisper against his cock, blowing warm air on his large, leaking member.
He seems to take a deep breath, as if he's trying to process what's happening. But when your hands start to glide along his length, everything else disappears.
Your touch is gentle, teasing at first, barely grazing his sensitive flesh. You watch, transfixed, as a bead of moisture wells up at the flushed tip, tempting you to taste. Unable to resist, you lean in and lap at it with the flat of your tongue, savoring the heady, masculine flavor that explodes across your senses.
Spurred on by his sharp intake of breath, you take him into your mouth, engulfing the swollen head and suckling gently. Your tongue swirls around him, taking him deeper on each downstroke until he hits the back of your throat. You can feel him throbbing against your tongue, growing even harder and more insistent.
You pull back slowly, releasing him from your mouth with a lewd pop. A string of saliva connects your bottom lip to the engorged head of his cock. You look up at him with hooded eyes, your lips curling into a seductive smile. "You taste so good," you purr, stroking him faster now. "I want to make you feel amazing, golden boy."
You see him lose control, but it's different. He's more vulnerable, more human, more real. And you're there, enjoying every second of that power.
The brush of your lips over his cock makes him sigh, but this time, the sigh is a whisper of surrender. He is no longer the leader of Piltover, the man of steel and determination. Now he's just Jayce, the man who yields to you, the man who lets himself be carried away by desire, by the need to feel closer to you.
With every step, you take him further beyond his limits. And as you do, he also shows you, in silence, how much he wants you, how much he needs you. Everything else fades away, leaving only the desire you both share.
But then, a familiar laugh cuts through the stillness of the night. You turn around to see Ekko, jumping from one ledge to another as if it were the most natural thing in the world, landing beside you with a smile only he could offer. The mischievous glint in his eyes tells you this night is going to be anything but boring.
Ekko
It's a cool night in the Undercity, the moonlight reflecting off the crumbling walls of the buildings as you stand atop a rooftop, watching the city sprawled beneath your feet. From here, everything seems calmer, more distant, even though life continues behind you.
"What are you doing here without me?" Ekko asks, raising an eyebrow, never taking his eyes off you. "Did you think you could enjoy the view without me joining you?"
You laugh, knowing exactly how he plays, how he always manages to make situations feel fun and full of energy. "Did you think I'd sit idly by while you strut around like the king of Zaun?" you respond with an equally playful smile.
The closeness between the two of you becomes more palpable, more charged, as if every shared word heightens the tension between you. The cool night air feels light, but the heat growing between you is anything but.
Ekko steps closer, his eyes gleaming with the confidence he always has, but there's something more. Something that makes you wonder if this moment will be different from the rest. He stands in front of you, his breath now closer to yours.
"The good thing about being up here," he says, looking you up and down, "is that no one can interrupt us." His tone is soft but with a hint of something you know exactly where it's leading.
You follow him with your gaze as he steps even closer. The tension builds, almost like a non-verbal challenge, and you can't help the mischievous smile forming on your face. Something about him incites you to play, to see how things unfold.
"Oh, yeah? And what do you want to do with all this privacy?" Of course, you knew, but you were playing along, as that was the dynamic between you.
Ekko's gaze intensifies, his lips curving into a satisfied smile as he steps closer to you. His hands rest on your hips, lightly firm but without pressing, as if waiting for something. His eyes never leave yours, teasing with the idea of what the two of you could do.
"Why use words when there are actions?" he responds, his voice so low and deep it makes you shiver. Without warning, his hands slide around your waist, lifting you slightly and pulling you closer to his chest.
The contact is gentle, but it feels like an electric jolt, as if everything between you had condensed into that single moment. He caresses your back with his fingers, as if wanting to explore every inch, but in a relaxed way, without haste. His game is subtle, but you're sure he's enjoying the uncertainty you're both creating.
"I want you," he murmurs against your lips.
You smirk and touch his crotch, enjoying his soft gasp in response.
"I know, I can feel it," you say with a provocative air, marking the first victory of the night.
But Ekko wasn't someone who gave up easily. He slid a hand between your legs, brushing against your sensitive spot still covered. You moaned and dug your nails into his shoulders.
"Yeah, I can feel it too," his tone was teasing, but not in a bad way.
A few seconds of playing, of tension, and then you dare to take the next step. You give him a gentle push, not too hard, but enough to stop his movement and make him look at you, amused but also a little surprised. "Is that all you got, Ekko?" you challenge, unable to resist the provocation in your tone.
With a low laugh, Ekko responds, "You're right, how could I underestimate you?" Then, he leans close to your ear, his breath brushing your skin. "I think this night is going to be more interesting than I thought."
In a swift move, he works on his belt, then pulls down his pants and underwear to his knees. But he doesn't stop there; he lifts you and raises your dress. In less than a second, he's inside you, large and warm, throbbing.
You gasped loudly and pulled his hair. Everything had happened so suddenly, so wild and erratic. But it was to be expected; you two had had immediate sexual tension from the first time you saw each other. Everyone knew it was only a matter of time before this happened.
The heat intensified, the electricity between you became palpable, your hips moving side to side, guided by his firm handsâit was a beautiful, coordinated dance. And before you can react, his lips meet yours in an intense but playful kiss. It's not rushed or desperate but filled with the passion you've both kept at bay, that spark that had always been there, waiting for a moment like this.
The kiss is deep, slow, as his hands explore your body softly but with a need for more. Ekko's playfulness doesn't fade, and you can feel how he changes the rhythm, how his caresses go from gentle to more demanding, as if challenging you to keep up.
"I knew you had something up your sleeve," he says, with a mocking smile between kisses. "But I didn't think you'd be this good at it." Ekko traced lines on your tense abdomen with his fingers while you rode himâyou were a sight to behold. His muse. There, under the moonlight caressing your face, your body united with his, it was a masterpiece.
"It's just that you make me want to play at your level," you respond, riding him with a steady, confident rhythm.
Ekko throws his head back, allowing himself to let go for a moment, enjoying your delicious motion. His expression is a delight, mouth slightly open and brows furrowedâthe face he makes when he's angry. And you've always had a particular fixation on angry Ekko, so you took advantage of the situation and kissed him once more. You needed it. You needed this. You've needed this for so long.
Every kiss became more frantic, every touch more necessary, every moan more intimate. On the rooftop, under the starry lights and the whisper of the wind, there was only you and Ekko. And that was all that mattered.
Silco
The atmosphere in the room is charged with tension. You've been close to him for some time, ever since that day he took you out of the brothel, that repugnant place that, for reasons you still don't fully understand, he allowed you to leave behind. Life with him is not easy, and you know he's watching you, testing, evaluating you at every moment. But you also know that, in some way, he's protected you, cared for you. And at this moment, that protection seems to be the foundation of what's about to happen between you two.
Silco, standing next to his desk, observes you in silence. His gaze is intense, calculating, but there's something more in it, something that makes you feel a warmth inside. You know you desire him, but you also know that in this moment, in this game between the two of you, you are not in control. And that's something that, strangely, excites you more than you imagined.
"I've been wondering for a while, dear," he says with his deep, controlled voice, "what did you learn in that unpleasant place where I found you?" His tone is cold, but there's something in his gaze that makes everything more intense.
You can't help a wave of shame mingling with desire. You remember that brothel, the looks you received, how you felt empty and worthless. But Silco didn't look at you like the others, he saw something more, something that made you feel important. Now, in front of him, you can't help but wonder what he thinks of you at this moment.
"I want to see how well you learned the lessons there. Maybe I can teach you some new ones." He takes a step toward you, his gaze now warmer but equally firm. "I'm dying to see what you're capable of doing with your hands, with your body."
The comment, though direct and unmistakably harsh, provokes you. And instead of feeling uncomfortable, you feel a surge of excitement fill you. You approach him, without a word, and with a bold gesture, your hands glide over his chest with a softness that contrasts with the hardness of his attitude.
He watches in silence, with that same look that always gives you the feeling he can see beyond the obvious. Silco takes your wrist firmly, without you resisting. He knows what he wants, and he's not afraid to go after it.
"Do you think you're capable of doing it, or should you keep waiting to be 'saved'?" The way he says it challenges you, and it's not the question that bothers you, but the way he throws it at you, as if demanding an answer no matter how much you hate or desire him.
At that moment, something inside you snaps, and you can't help it. You stare at him, defying him, knowing you want him, but not wanting to give in so easily. "Do you really think you can teach me something? I don't think so," you say with a playful tone but with that fire in your eyes that you know he likes.
His response is immediate. He grabs you by the waist and, in a swift movement, pushes you against his desk, bending your torso and pressing your face against the wooden surface. The distance between your bodies is minimal, almost nonexistent, as his hands find your underwear, in a brutal and demanding manner. There is no softness, no tender caresses; it's all hardness, passion, and control. Silco owns the moment, and you are his.
"I think it's time you see what happens when you act like a spoiled brat," he whispers, his voice low and almost dangerous. And you have the feeling you're on slippery ground, but that only increases the intensity of the moment. His cock enters you slowly, painfully slow, as if he were torturing you, and before you could say anything, he had already started fucking you hard.
Your body reacts immediately, feeling his dominance and the way his hands move over you with urgency. You don't resist because you know this is what you've been waiting for. In his thrusts, there is power, control, but also a palpable desire to possess you, to take what belongs to him.
Silco isn't afraid to show you his rough side. He caresses you firmly, no matter what you think, as if everything you have been until now fades away in the act. You are not the girl you used to be, the one who escaped from men who saw her as mere merchandise. No, now you are in front of him, showing him that you also know what you want.
"I should have fucked you earlier. You feel incredible. Now I understand why you were so expensive; you must have been one of the star workers," he says, with his rough voice, as his hands cling to your hips, pushing into you relentlessly, each movement more demanding than the last. "But now you're mine."
And though every word he says burns you, you know this is a game where neither of you is afraid to lose. Silco has taken over you, but the truth is you have also taken over him, and both are caught in this whirlwind of desire and power, where passion consumes everything.
When you enter, Mel greets you with a soft smile, her gaze as always, deep, calculating, but this time thereâs something different in her eyes, something that makes you feel like youâre not in the middle of a negotiation or a political discussion, but in something much more personal.
Mel
"Stay close," she says with that soft but firm voice that always makes you feel like everything else disappears. There are no rules, no power tensions, only the weight of desire slowly building between the two of you.
The distance between you is minimal, but Mel doesnât make the first move, she waits. She looks at you with those eyes that seem to see everything about you, making you feel exposed but, at the same time, as if itâs the most natural thing in the world. Itâs as if thereâs a tacit permission in her gaze, an understanding that this moment will belong to just the two of you.
The space between you fills with palpable energy, the room dimly lit by candlelight, creating a warm and inviting atmosphere. Itâs not a place of power, but of calm, where the rules are different, and emotions are raw.
You gasp in surprise when you see her shed her robe, revealing nothing underneath. Her beautiful dark skin contrasted with the golden details she always wore as accessories. She was ethereal. That woman was ethereal.
Insecure, you undress as well, nervous about not meeting her expectations. Because you could never come close to her beauty and divinity. Once youâre naked, your trembling hands move to cover your body.
Mel steps toward you, her delicate but firm hands brushing against your face. "You donât have to hide," she whispers, and the softness of her voice completely envelops you. For a moment, it seems like nothing else matters. The tension youâve been feeling dissipates, replaced by a deep desire, something that pulls you toward her.
The touch of her fingers on your skin makes you close your eyes for a moment, allowing yourself to be carried away by the sensation. She gracefully caresses your breasts, tracing every imperfection. Thereâs no rush, no anxiety, only the slow rhythm set by Mel, allowing you to explore whatever is blossoming between the two of you.
"I want you here," she murmurs in your ear, taking your hand and placing it on her pussy, the warmth there sending a shiver through you. You begin to stimulate her, and she does the same to you. You can feel how her presence fills the space, how her words are not just a whisper, but an invitation to something deeper. In her embrace, in her hands on you, you find a calm you never thought youâd find, but also an intensity you hadnât anticipated.
It doesnât matter whatâs between you, whatâs happened in the past, or what will come in the future, because in this moment, the only thing that exists is Mel and you, and the connection that feels more natural than ever. She doesnât need anything more from you, she doesnât demand anything, but you know that what happens between you wonât be just a physical encounter; it will be a turning point, something both of you will treasure.
Mel leans into you, her lips, soft but filled with determination, meeting yours. The intensity of her kiss isnât aggressive, but it has a depth that captivates you, wrapping you in a calm passion, where every move, every gesture, holds a meaning much greater than physical desire. Your fingers work harder to give her pleasure; youâve become addicted to her moans, to the way her coded seriousness crumbles in front of you.
She holds you by the waist with one hand, while with the other, she caresses your cheek tenderly, as if, for once, she allows herself to be vulnerable with you. The softness of her touch is almost unsettling but so comforting at the same time. "I trust you," she says, and those words are all you need to hear.
You take control of the situation, pressing her against the nearest wall, your lips sucking on her skin, and your fingers never leaving her wet pussy for a second. She embraces you and lets it happen, allowing herself to be vulnerable with you.
The moment stretches on, and Mel, with her confidence but also with her vulnerability, guides you without rush, without pressure. There are no expectations, only the desire to share something genuine, something real.
Sevika
The alley is dark and silent, shadows are the only thing surrounding you after the mission you just completed with Sevika. Sweat covers your skin, along with the blood youâre not sure belongs to you or the men you took down with your own hands. Torn clothes and dirt on your face are reminders of what you just went through: more than 30 men, and only you and Sevika, emerging victorious from the battle.
Sevika stands by your side, her gaze fierce, her face as marked by the fight as yours. Yet, there is no fear in her eyes, only a determination that ignites something in you, a need for something more, something raw, whatever may arise at this moment. In the middle of the darkness, the air heavy with dust and adrenaline, the chemistry between the two of you is palpable, almost unbearable.
"Did you have fun?" Sevika's voice is rough, as if the battle left more than just physical marks. She takes a step towards you, her large, strong body invading your personal space in a way that makes you feel more alive than ever. Itâs not just her presence that burns you; itïżœïżœs the way she looks at you, as if sheâs not afraid of what might happen between the two of you, as if she already knows that, at this moment, thereâs only the two of you.
Your breathing quickens, not from exhaustion but from the tension building in the air. You donât need to say anything; thereâs no need for words. The silence between you fills with the mutual need that has been accumulating since the first second you clashed in that alley, fighting side by side.
"We did it, right?" Sevika almost challenges you with her words, her tone low and loaded with desire. Her body moves slowly towards yours, and when her hands grab your waist firmly, you realize thereâs no turning back.
Your body trembles when her lips meet yours, rough and filled with unexpected passion. Thereâs no sweetness in this kiss, only hunger, a need that canât be hidden. Sevikaâs hands roam your back, pulling you toward her with force, as if sheâs marking her territory. Thereâs no play, only the rawness of two people whoâve been on the edge of the abyss and now surrender completely to whatever comes. She makes you climb on her body, your legs wrapping around her hips.
The air smells of sweat, blood and hot skin, the atmosphere so charged that you can feel the heat of her body as if it were merging with yours. Sevika doesn't ask your permission to explore, to take what you both know you've been wanting for far too long. Sevika is strong enough to carry you with one hand and with the other to literally tear your underwear apart. She didn't wait for a yes from you, nor an invitation, because she was sure that you wanted her, oh and how right she was.
Her fingers pumped savagely in and out, the obscene sound of wet flesh smacking against flesh echoing in the close confines of the alley.
"Fuck, you're so fucking wet, little thing," Sevika snarled, her breath hot and ragged against your neck. She punctuated her words with a particularly brutal thrust, bending you nearly in half over her arm.
You could only whimper and writhe, impaled on Sevika's invading fingers, the rough brick scraping your back raw. Sevika's other hand gripped your thigh hard enough to bruise, squeezing and kneading the soft flesh as she fucked you with wild abandon.
It was pure, animalistic rutting, a savage taking of pleasure and seeking of release. Your moans turned to desperate cries, your nails scrabbling at her shoulders as the pleasure bordered on pain.
Every movement is wild, fierce, a whirlwind of sensations you barely manage to process. The sound of ripping clothes, the clattering of shoes against the pavement, and the labored breathing filled with adrenaline fill the alley. In this moment, all that exists is the way Sevika possesses you, with that unstoppable force, with the energy of someone who doesnât ask permission but takes whatâs theirs.
Her fingers never slowed, plunging in and out, stirring up your insides, until finally, with a hoarse scream, you came undone. Your cunt clenched and spasmed around Sevika's fingers, gushing fluid down her wrist and splattering onto the filthy ground below.
But she didn't stop. She kept fucking you through your orgasm, extending it, drawing it out until you were a boneless, mewling mess.
"I've been watching you all this time, you know what you're doing," she whispers between kisses, her deep voice filled with admiration and desire. "I love women who know how to fight."
Then she pulls her fingers out, bringing them to her mouth and sucking your essence from them with a low, satisfied groan.
"Tastes like a woman who knows how to fight to me," she grins wickedly.
The passion was raw, direct, an explosion of repressed emotions, and when it all ends, only the cold sweat of the battle and the warmth of her body still pressed against yours remain, the feeling that, despite everything, this is what both of you needed.
#arcane x reader#arcane fanfic#arcane imagine#arcane x female reader#arcane#arcane x you#ekko arcane#jinx arcane#jinx x reader#ekko x reader#arcane silco#arcane smut#silco x reader#mel arcane#mel x reader#arcane caitlyn#caitlyn x reader#arcane jayce#jayce x reader#viktor arcane#viktor x you#viktor x y/n#viktor x reader#arcane vi#sevika arcane#vi x y/n#vi x reader#sevika x reader#sevika x you#vi x you
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The Doctor and River Songâs love story is not cheap laughs. It is not shallow. It is not fetishization. It is artfully tragic, beautifully timey-wimey, and deeply emotional. Steven Moffat crafted something extraordinary in giving the Doctor a love interest like Riverâsomeone who embodies complexity, agency, and a heartbreaking devotion to a man who would choose her as much as sheâd choose him.
In "The Wedding of River Song," River doesnât just marry the Doctor. She declares the immensity of her love. She tells him how much he is cherished, how much she loves him beyond anything or anyone in the universe. And what does the Doctor do? He stops running. He finally puts a ring on it. He chooses her as much as she chooses him. Thereâs even a comic tied to that episode showing him seriously considering letting time collapse around themâdestroying the universeâjust to live a linear life with his wife. Thatâs not comedy. Thatâs pathos. Thatâs the depth of their devotion, wrapped in impossible choices.
In "Forest of the Dead," River gives up her life to save the Doctor, knowing that her death is the reason theyâll have a life together. She sacrifices herself, fully aware that her death is the linchpin to the love story theyâre writing together. Without her final act of love, there is no âthem.â Riverâs death becomes the foundation of their story. "You and me. Time and space. You watch us run."
In "The Name of the Doctor," we learn something extraordinary: even though the audience hasnât always seen River, the Doctor always has. Every little thingâevery moment of music, every whisper of memoryâis her. "The music room is the heart of the home." (in "Hide" and the ever so fleeting, flickering pain that crossed his face) "The long song is over." (in The Rings of Akhaten) She is always there for him, and he never forgets her. "You are always here to me. And I always listen. And I can always see you." An apology, a gesture of gratitude, and a vow of eternal love. If that isnât love, what is?
"The Husbands of River Song" finds River grieving the loss of her parents. Sheâs raw, vulnerable, and trying to convince herself that the Doctor doesnât love her. But when she says that, it isnât a factâitâs her grief speaking. And the Doctorâs "Hello, Sweetie" is more than just a balm for her wounds. Itâs a quiet affirmation that he sees her pain and will stand beside her in it. He already watched her die, and still, he is there, grasping for every stolen moment they can share. Thatâs not a jokeâitâs a testament to their bond.
Yes, their timeline is chaotic. Yes, the story is messy. Thatâs the point. Itâs not linearâitâs timey-wimey, just like them. Their love isnât about clean resolutions or easy endings. Itâs about devotion in the face of impossibility. Itâs about choosing each other despite Time itself tearing them apart. And even then, Time can't help but show them the "what if" of a linearly lived life.
Are there flaws in the writing? Sure. Could their story have been developed better? Maybe. But to dismiss River Songâs character as just cheap laughs and fetishization misses everything she stands for. She is the Doctorâs equal, his partner, and his match. And their love storyâtragic, hilarious, heartbreaking, and beautifulâdeserves better than to be dismissed as anything less.
the doctor and river song are unironically one of the most tragic love stories in modern media, but they keep getting undermined by writing that would rather go for cheap laughs and badly hidden fetishisations instead of fully leaning into the pathos of time travellers who keep meeting their soulmate in the wrong order
#doctor who#doctor x river#doctorriver musings#river song#the doctor#this felt good. miss yapping about my two beloved needs communication + therapy + hugs loml of which œ needs to come back#also I think there are other River references in 7b but I love those two and therefore they get the showcase treatment#anyways for all the could have been developed betters it's certainly a painful ride to get on. worth it though. now give them back go me ty
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5 Times Bruce Was Protective of His Pups (+2 Times They Were Protective of Him)
1: The Interview
Batman hates a lot of things: mornings, waking up early, the sunlight peaking through his curtains, people-more specifically, Superman-bossing him around (even if that one is a bit hypocritical) and losing (in general) bets, just to name a few. But, another thing is strangers being around his newly adopted pup; Richard, anything and anyone that isn't deemed trustworthy to Bruce is deemed as a threat or kept in his sights as a potential enemy until stated otherwise.
Which is why Batman finds himself feeling antsy as he waits for the signal to be given for him and Superman to exit the backstage area together and onto set.
The omega doesn't even know why he agreed to be shown in public with his pup and Superman, it's just...he couldn't resist the excited little eyes turned his way when Richard heard the Kryptonian suggest doing an interview together. Of course, Bruce knows he should have knew his pup would be excited at the idea of an audience, the boy was a performer and entertainer for Heaven's sake, it's just that he never expected for himself to be so nervous about taking his baby out in public for the first time in awhile that wasn't for dealing with small crimes.
"Robin, make sure to stay under my cape unless stated otherwise, okay?"
The boy pouts at the gentle command, curious as to why his mom is so nervous. "But why? I could perform a lot of cool tricks for them out there. I bet they've never seen a live circus act before!"
Batman sighs fondly at the boy's youthful exuberance, his gloved hand instinctively raising to scent the boy's neck gland before realizing his own wrist is covered and settling for gently ruffling the pup's hair. "I bet so too. But...I would really appreciate it if you stayed under my cape until I tell you to come out-" He pauses at the disbelieving look on Robin's face, sighing softly in response-"What is it? Why do you look like that?"
"Because you aren't planning to let me ever come out, are you?"
At Batman's silence, Robin pouts further, a frustrated little puppy squeak escaping his throat. "See! Why can't I show them my tricks, B? I know they'd love to see me! Do you know how much people talk about Robin in the news? I'd be a hit!"
Batman takes in the boy's excited face carefully, thinking that maybe he's holding the boy back from something that could be good for him, but he knows his worries aren't unfounded. He remembers when he was just a pup, traumatized from witnessing his parents murder and just as bitter and angry as Richard...which is why he's not comfortable with the pup being in the spotlight, the boy seems to have good days where he's excited and happier than ever before; but then, things are too loud, the media that never ceases to leave Bruce Wayne alone too much for the poor boy to handle...and he's just scared that they'll upset his precious child, that maybe all of this spotlight won't be that great in the end, but what is he to do? He gave Alfred a break today and won't bother the alpha to come and watch his pup when the reasons for it most likely aren't even that serious.
A deep, soothing voice, however, interrupts Batman's thoughts.
"C'mon, Batman. Robin seems to be all for it, so why not let him be in the limelight for a few minutes? He knows you'll keep a good eye on him...and I hope you know that I will too?"
Superman gives a calm, reassuring smile down towards the smaller man, hoping that it's as disarming as he's trying to make it. This whole thing with the Bat is still fairly new, and he's even surprised that the man agreed to doing this with him when the other was so...volatile when they first met, but to be fair, Robin wasn't there when they encountered each other. It seems that the pup really has changed Batman in an unimaginable way.
"Of course he knows that-" a quick glance to his pup-"At least I hope he knows that?" Batman is yet again interrupted by his pup tugging at his cape desperately, "Pleeeease! Pretty pleeeeease? I promise I'll make you look good and-and make sure to smile-oh! Wait--I'll make sure to look grumpy to make you look really, reeeeally serious. And I'll stay close by, and I'll-"
"Okay, okay. You can...go...out there. But! You have to stay behind me when we go out first, okay? I'll make sure to introduce you properly before you do anything, they don't even know that you are here with us."
Robin nods enthusiastically and instinctually hides behind the omega at hearing someone approaching their dressing room, a small but audible knock is heard before one of the PA pokes their head in. "U-Uh...Superman, sir. A-And...Batman, sir. I've been told to come and get you guys, it's almost time for you all to h-head on." The poor beta swallows nervously at Batman's blank, white stare being directed his way. He can't see the man's eyes, but he can feel the icy stare piercing his skin almost painfully, luckily enough, Superman steps in front of the Bat with a bright smile. "Of course, thank you! We'll be right on out."
The beta nods quickly before rushing out of the dressing room, leaving the three heroes alone, Robin snickering softly at Batman's attitude.
"Agent A wouldn't appreciate your lack of manners, B. You were supposed to say, 'thank you very much.' You teach me to say please and thank you, but I never hear you say it...unless it's to Al-Agent A." The displeased grumble coming from Batman makes Robin even more amused, "That's because Agent A deserves said pleases and thank you's...most of the time anyway, though sometimes he gets on my nerves giving his opinion when I never asked for it. I'm surprised I haven't fired him ye-" Robin's 'oooh' cuts him off, even if the pup knows this familiar pattern of Bruce "threatening" to fire Alfred or lessen his pay, the child still likes to cause mischief wherever he can. "I'm telling him what you said! And you can't fire him, he's your daddy!"
Batman softens at the pup's words and-yet again-sighs softly, nodding in agreement of the pup's analysis of his and Alfred's relationship, slipping out a one hundred dollar bill for the pup just in case he really does plan on telling Alfred what was said.
"I won't say anything about my lack of manners or any threats to Agent A as long as you don't?"
Robin takes a moment to think about the question in Batman's tone; a mere proposition for him to not say anything, after all, he knows how scary Alfred's wrath can be. And even if it's not anger, you still don't want to be scolded by the older alpha...it makes you feel guilty for any bad things you've done, however, it's just that: a proposition, a mere suggestion for Robin to decide if he wants to go along with Batman's request or not, and while he may not be business savvy, he's not an idiot and immediately snatches the money and slips it into his own utility belt. "What are you talking about, B?"
The omega smiles down proudly at his pup and the genuine look of innocence written all over the pup's face, "That's my boy-"
Superman clears his throat to get the two Gothamites attention, holding the dressing room door open for the two when they look his way. "We have an interview to show up to...and I don't think we should make them wait any longer, it'd be rude-"
"But Batman isn't rude. He has the greatest manners ever, very nice."
Superman looks amused at Robin keeping up his act, eyeing the boy suspiciously as Batman leads them out the door. "You sure about that? Your answer wasn't swayed by...perhaps, a one hundred dollar bill?"
A small, offended gasp escapes the pup who decided to hide under the black cape anyway. "I don't take bribes, Superman, only cash or credit." The Super snorts at the young boy, not bothering to correct him on how that's what a bribe usually entails is money, instead, choosing to superspeed his way in front of Batman. "Do you want me to head out first? I...know how uncomfortable taking Robin out made you? So, maybe seeing me first might be for the best."
Batman wants to bristle at the taller pointing out his vulnerability...but he's too busy trying to ignore the flutter of his heart at the alpha's thoughtfulness.
"Mm. Fine."
ââââ°ââââ
The directed applause dies down as they come back from a commercial break, the interviewer/talkshow host smiling brightly for the camera. "For the first time in the history of ever we have two very special guests coming out for us today-and I don't mean gay-" the audience erupts into cued laughter-"One is the Golden Child of Metropolis, Superman, who is used to being in the spotlight and having annoying folks like myself poking and prodding at him. Let's give the champion of Krypton a big, but not too big, round of applause! He's still from Metropolis folks."
The crowd gives a more genuine round of applause and laughter this time around, the Gothamites curiously watching the super powered alien exit from the back with watchful eyes, one audience member shouting how they think Gotham Knights is still a better baseball team than whatever forgettable team Metropolis has.
Superman has to hold back from replying about how if his team is so " forgettable", then why did the Gotham Knights lose the World Series two times to them. It really shouldn't bother the Kryptonian as much as it does...but he loves baseball, so sue him for being passionate about it. Instead, he offers the host a thankful smile for having him in Gotham, the woman feeling as though she has to squint to properly look at the alpha. "How is anyone this happy in the morning? I'll never know, but thank you for agreeing to come to Gotham for this interview, Superman."
She pauses as the crowd claps again, her excitement-and nerves-growing at who she has to introduce next.
"Next is someone who I have great respect for and am extremely proud to introduce. This man-or I should say-Bat, is an enigma; a legend and seemingly myth to all who have heard of his great, seemingly impossible, feats. I am very happy-" and nervous goes unsaid-"to introduce our Dark Knight of Gotham, Batman!"
The crowd grows deathly silent as the Bat steps out onto set, the mood changing to one of slight unease and stunned awe as the man's beloved people witness his cape dramatically fanning out on the ground around him like some sort of Gothic wedding train. His stance tall and confident; commanding, as he keeps his eyes trained on the now stupefied TV hostess, each step eerily silent yet so loud to the people watching him walk forward as if he owns the place. The silence deafening as everyone takes a moment to process that the Batman is actually here, "U-Uh, you may seat-I mean, take a seat...i-if you want Batman, you don't need to if you don't...want...to."
The woman messes with her already neat hair nervously, turning to smile at the audience and camera to the best of her abilities. "Uh...a round of applause, please?" It takes a few more seconds before everyone reclaims the basics of their fine motor skills and burst into loud applauses and whistles.Â
Batman does his best not to growl at the audience, they aren't doing anything wrong...just being loud and making his protective instincts flair, but he knows it's not them.
It takes everything in the omega to not clear his throat before speaking, if he does, that would most likely be a sign that he is nervous...and just in case any enemies are watching, he can't let them see he's weak, especially with a pup around. He ignores the woman's curious and slightly worried looks as to why he hasn't taken his seat yet, and turns to the audience and camera crew. "Before we begin, I have someone else you should be pleased to meet-" everyone's eyes are immediately drawn towards the small, vibrating lump underneath his cape-"Batman can't go anywhere without his partner, so you better show your appreciation at the new vigilante, Robin."
Everyone in the crowd gasps quietly and excitedly at the small pup that rushes out of the cape and performs a series of difficult flips and tumbles before landing perfectly and bowing.
Robin keeps his head bowed as the crowd cheers loudly and coos at him, rubbing at his chest at the random prickly feeling in it from the noise, before sitting up and smiling cutely. "Thank you! Thank you!" The crowd genuinely giggles at the cute display, no one daring to show the usual Gotham grumpiness towards the Bat's pup.
Batman finally takes his seat next to Superman, the alpha nodding at him proudly for not getting defensive while the omega does everything to ignore that stupid flutter in his stomach from that godforsaken smile.
"O-Oh, wow! This was something completely unexpected, but absolutely welcomed! Another round of applause for our guest heroes on: Shut Up! And Spill That Tea." The hostess relaxes somewhat at the sight of the pup, she admits that the boy is a breath of fresh air in the usual smog of Gotham...and the feeling of the studio, because while Superman is a way friendlier presence than Batman, he still is intimidating in his own way. She finds herself softening at the sight of the pup skipping up to Batman and crawling up onto the alpha's lap, "Thank you for gracing us with your presence, Robin. It's very nice to be able to meet such an adorable new face."
The boy smiles at the hostess and waves at her seemingly bashfully while his other hand holds his cheek. "You flatter me, Veronica-I mean, Ms. Veronica. I love your show." Her eyes widen at the fact that the pup watches her program, "Oh...thank you! I didn't know that you watched my show? How do you have time for that with all this crime fighting?" Veronica glances up at Batman to gauge his reaction to her question, sighing softly in relief at his attention placed carefully onto his pup.
Robin pouts at the question, his arms crossing to show his displeasure. "I'm not allowed out every night. B and Agent A say that growing pups need as much rest as possible...even though I try to tell them that I'm old enough to stay up late."
The crowd 'oooh's' and 'ahhh's' at his confession, Veronica perking up at the sudden mention of another name. "I have to say that I agree, you still need your sleep to grow just as strong as Batman. And I'm sure this...Agent A is a good man too if he's working with you both, if I may ask, who is this mysterious agent?" Robin pauses at that, worrying he maybe revealed too much and glances up at Batman quickly to see if he messed up, relaxing into the other when he looks normal enough. "He's a mysterious agent as you said. But back to how I watch your show! I enjoy waking up every morning and watching it! Because B only allows me to fight petty crimes on weekends, I have to get my drama fix every other day."
Even though the boy completely avoided her question, Veronica can't find it in herself to be annoyed like how she'd usually be if anyone else tried it.
"I appreciate you for tuning in! What makes you enjoy my brand of tea spills compared to other shows?"
Robin's smile is mischievous, "I enjoy how you don't hesitate to give your opinion. You aren't a suck up like most other TV hosts when they speak on a topic, and while you talk about things that may or may not be true, you keep it real in your opinion without also being overly cruel."
Veronica makes an impressed noise at how clearly the boy speaks, of course he's still a child...but definitely better spoken than most children she runs into. "Now who's the flatterer-" she smiles and looks at the camera for a minute-"Listen up, folks! This is something completely new and different for a show like this, as many of my viewers know, we talk gossip and scandals here a lot. But, as we are dealing with two men who could easily crush me if I ask the wrong questions, we will go a different route today and just stick with regular schmegular interview questions with...maybe slightly juicier questions thrown in, at least with Superman anyhow."
Veronica turns back towards the two older heroes, her eyes trying not to linger on Batman too long in fear he'll snip at her for admiring his physique a little too closely.
"Alrighty, so, you two have made headlines about a year or two ago with the announcement that Superman was in Gotham. Even better, was the lucky bastard who captured you two together on a rooftop, though some eye witnesses say our Dark Knight wasn't all too welcoming. I-as I'm sure everyone else-would love to know how you two first met and what caused Superman to bother stepping foot in Gotham?"
She leans in expectantly, expecting Superman to cooperate first and easiest.
"Well...If I'm allowed to say this? That wasn't the first time Batman and I met, we met a year prior in Metropolis when he was investigating a crime that involved both Lex Luthor and The Joker. That instance was the first time we were actually captured together, however, and...yeah, Batman wasn't so welcoming of me being here."
Veronica eyes the Kryptonian like a predator with its prey as he keeps drifting his eyes over to look at Batman, the excitement bubbling in her stomach at the almost reverential look the alpha wears on his face. Humming in response to his words, "And how exactly have you come to this point of doing an interview together? No one can get their hands on the Bat...not unless you are as stupid enough to try it like the Rogue Gallery, but I guess Superman can use his powers in many ways, right everyone?"
The audience whoops and wolf whistles at the implications of her words, the Super flushing under the attention and because he would love to use his powers in such a way towards the Bat.Â
"Superman isn't as stupid as he appears, Veronica. He'd be a fool to try touching me."
Everyone grows silent again at the Bat talking, a shiver running down everyone's spine at the soothing, yet bone shaking, silky deepness of the man's voice.
Superman's eyebrows twitch at the way the other man says it...he...technically did touch the Bat when he pushed him into the wall with his superspeed, but the man pulled out his greatest weakness in retaliation. However, he still got to touch the Batman! Veronica licks her lips in excitement at the Bat actually participating and saying something, "Of course! So I take that to mean, he has never tried being forceful with you?" It's Robin that responds this time, his voice innocently confused. "Why would they fight? They're friends."
The set descends into a silent chaos as the audience starts whispering about what was just said, Veronica turning her sights back to the pup, deciding she'll try to suck as much information out of him (in a nice way) as possible, because the boy obviously has all the tea to spill.
He's her strongest weapon right now.
"Oh? They are friends, are they?"
Robin nods absentmindedly while crawling around all over Batman, playfully biting the Bat-ears and tugging as he usually does whenever he's near the omega's head.
"Yeah! B came down today because I overheard Superman asking him if he wanted to do this. Batman said no, but I was super excited at the thought of-" Robin yips at Batman's gloved hands gently grabbing his scruff warningly, not enough to hurt obviously, but to get the excited pup to calm down and stop him from saying anything more. Right...he almost exposed how he was excited to see an audience again, that could cause possible questions to anyone listening extremely closely as to who his civilian identity is. "B-eeee..."
Everyone watches as the pup is gently reprimanded, the boy puffing his cheeks out and snuggling up to the Bat immediately after the punishment, his apologetic puppy squeaks filling the room.
Batman huffs fondly at the boy, ignoring the urge to nuzzle into the boy's neck and gently rubbing his back instead. "He heard us talking and begged me to come on this show. I only came because he likes it so much." Veronica swallows nervously at the man looking at her but nods, "T-That's very sweet of you to do this for Robin. Uh...we have to go on a commercial break, but we'll be right back with more hot topics for these three heroes."
Veronica slumps in her seat as soon as they go to commercial, scrubbing a hand carefully down her face and sighing loudly as the pressure slightly lifts from her shoulders.
Her honey brown eyes eye the trio curiously, watching as the pup is given consolation snacks, her manicured nails tapping unconsciously on her desk as she wonders what the boy was about to say and how she can pull more juicy stuff out of the pup without scaring him off. She enjoys juicy gossip as much as any other drama leech, but she doesn't like to make innocent pups cry, especially not Batman's pup.
Veronica closes her eyes as the makeup artist touches up her face with a powder so she doesn't look so greasy, it's not her fault she was starting to sweat under the intimidating glare of Batman.
The shocked gasp escaping from her makeup artist startles the TV hostess out from her thoughts, her mouth hanging open stupidly at the Bat standing in front of her desk. "Robin was looking forward to performing." Veronica is frozen in place at the command in his tone, as though he expects her to open up a spot for the pup to perform. "O-Oh...I was...supposed to ask questions-"
"Your questions are stupid-"
"Batman!"
Superman zips over to the man, his gaze apologetic towards Veronica for the other's rudeness. "I'm sorry about him, it seems he forgot the conversation he had with Robin about manners."
"What conversation?"
Robin speaks up from around his lollipop, looking between Superman and Veronica curiously. "I don't remember that? I do know I mentioned something about B being suuuuper duuuuper polite and well-mannered." The boy turns fully towards the intimidated and fascinated woman, "Can I pretty please do some tricks for you all? I promise you've never seen anyone perform quite like I have! That's why I came today, B said that I would be able to do something."
Batman grumbles, "I never said that."
Veronica looks between the Bat and his pup before conceding to the puppy eyes she knows the boy is making at her.
"Alright, alright, kid. No need to look at me like that. I'm sure we can open up a spot for you as soon as we come back on air, m'kay?" Veronica straightens out her suit jacket as everyone rushes back into place, her lips twitching up in amusement as Batman quietly tells Robin he can't perform with a lollipop in his mouth, her perfectly trained smile returning as the last commercial plays. "I know that we are getting off of our usual schedule, but it seems that Robin would like to perform some lovely tricks for us today. So if we could give him a warm round of applause as he takes the spotlight to let him know how eager we are to see his special tricks he's learned from Batman himself."
Veronica is thankful for the sound crew in this moment and how they don't bother showing irritation if they have any, but choose to play a song for Robin to do his flips to, the crowd clapping along as the music starts and the boy performs on the open floor.
Robin gives a beaming smile as he begins, reveling in the cheers and aww's he receives anytime he does something particularly cool. It feels as though it's been forever since he's done something like this, even though he knows deep down it probably hasn't been horribly long, it feels...freeing to pull stunts like this once more for an exuberant audience, yet also intimidating, he tries his best to push on despite that prickly feeling appearing again in his chest.
His mind flashes back to that horrible night as his body soars through the air, the anxious feeling spreading through him the more he thinks about it.
That fateful night started just like this too, didn't it?
Robin remembers how excited he was to witness his parents perform, recalls how enthusiastic he was to do his own little show, a-and the audience were just as loud and excited as he was too. Their claps and screams filling his ears as he flipped across the stage...yet unlike then, he feels himself falling-falling-falling--
Everyone gasps as Robin lands awkwardly and falls down with a loud cry, everyone's worried murmurs sounding too loud for the pup's sensitive ears, his hands lifting to cover them in hopes he can't hear the horrified shouts of the audience. A dangerous snarl is heard from Batman towards the camera crew and how they focus on Robin, one of them having the audacity to zoom in on the boy's reaction. "Turn the cameras off, now!" Veronica flinches at the command and waves frantically at her crew, disappointment in her gaze towards the one camera man for his carelessness towards the pup.
Luckily the cameras cut off to a commercial break as Robin shouts, "M-Mommy! Daddy!" The mood tense as the pup reaches out to people who aren't even there, "M-Mama!"
Everyone is too stunned to notice how Batman reacts to the last call, a snarl ripping through his throat at the people watching his son like some spectacle as he quickly gathers the puppy into his arms, securely tucking him away under his cape before gliding off set with his trembling bundle.
Superman can't help his own protective glare directed towards the one specific cameraman before super speeding to the dressing room where he can hear Robin struggling to breathe properly, standing guard outside to make sure no one approaches them and keeping his ear out for the two. "C'mon puppy, breathe with me-" a loud whimper from the boy as Batman shushes him-"I know it's hard to, but mama is right here, it's going to be okay--"
Superman's eyes widen at that and he chooses to stop listening in, standing taller with a warning growl as one of the crew passes by.
"You aren't at the circus, baby. You are right here, on the set of Shut Up! And Spill That Tea, your favorite show, yeah? Can you feel my arms around you?" Batman waits for Robin's slow nod, the omega looking around cautiously before taking off his mask to nuzzle the pup, "That's very good. You are doing so well, honey, but I'm still concerned about your breathing. Just...come here-" he gently turns the boy's head so that his ear is resting on his chest-"Listen to my heartbeat and just follow it as best you can. I'm going to count to five when we inhale and count eight with exhaling, okay? Follow along as best you can."
Robin whimpers, his heartbeat too loud in his own ears, yet warring with the calming, steady sound of Bruce's own.
"One. Two. Three. Four. Five-" Bruce's voice washes over Richard like calming, gently swaying waters, the pup clinging onto the older man's voice like a lifeline as he slowly starts to breathe normally.
Batman, after a couple minutes of repeating the patterns, ends with his own relieved exhale at the pup's breathing evening out into something normal. "Richard..." His voice croons softly to the child at the tears wetting his suit, "Are you okay?" The boy sniffles and nuzzles into Bruce's neck, sniffling the soft and spicy scent of the omega. "I-I'm sorry, mama. I-I couldn't-you were right! I couldn't handle it a-and I made you look-" he's cut off at the hands that gently grab at his tear stained cheeks.
"Don't even finish that sentence. It's not about how you made me look, I already know how I look, and that's fine with me. This is about you and how you are holding up now...you know I understand what you're going through, don't you?" Richard softens at the reminder that Bruce truly does know how he feels, nodding his head gently as he slumps against his mom.Â
"Do I...do I have to go back out there?"
Bruce growls protectively, hugging the boy closely, flashbacks of the media bombarding and overwhelming him when he was this age coming to the forefront of his mind. "Never! You never have to be seen by them if you don't want to. Only when you are ready to."
Robin nods softly, the weight of his stress making him sleepy as he rests his head against Bruce's shoulder, his ears twitching at the sound of Batman's communicator chiming, watching sleepily as the omega slips his mask back on and answers. "Alfred says he's on his way back home with ingredients for some chicken noodle soup, if that sounds pleasing to you?"
Robin hums softly with a small smile on his face, nodding and nuzzling into the man as he clears out their scents from the room before exiting the door.
Superman slumps in relief at seeing Robin look a lot less shaken than before, though there's still some lingering shakiness from the sudden flashback. "Is he okay?" Batman tightens his hold on Robin, his hand gently rubbing up and down the pup's back. "Yes. He's going to be fine, Superman-" the omega curses the unwanted warmth he feels at the alpha showing concern for his pup-"We...have to go though, he's not going back out there after that. I'm so-"
The Kryptonian waves off the apology, "Don't even say that, please. I've never heard you apologize for anything before...and I definitely don't want it to be for something like this-" the alpha looks away nervously, wanting to ask so many questions about what he heard the other man say to Robin, but deciding against it as now's not the time-"U-Um...can I give you both a lift home? My cape will keep you both warm and cozy on the trip to...wherever it is you go to." Batman bounces his child higher, adjusting his hold on the boy as he eyes Superman wearily for the offer, softening slightly at realizing it was just a genuine offer. "No, I have my own ride. Batmobile, remember?"
"Oh! Right...right."
The two heroes stand there awkwardly, the soft sound of Robin's snores managing to cut through the tense air as the alpha and omega focus on the boy.
"I should--You should get him home."Â
They pause to stare at each other for speaking at the same time, Batman nodding his head in thanks for Superman's understanding as he heads to the exit, his mouth opening slightly in surprise as the Super holds the door open for him.
"Your hands are full."
With a small hum, Batman exits the building, squinting instinctively at the rare show of sunlight shining down through Gotham's sky, the Batmobile's roof sliding open as he nears it. The omega gently settles the pup into his seat while Superman keeps an eye out for any gossip hungry media, heading over to the driver's side after buckling the child up and hesitating before hopping in, his tone uncharacteristically soft as he addresses the alpha, "Thank you."
Superman feels his heart beat furiously in his chest at the gently whispered words, watching the Batmobile race off before turning his eyes up to the bright sky and smiling, remembering exactly why he's so fond of mornings.
(This is taken from my AO3 account here: Thicc_Personality I just thought I'd cross post it here too as I haven't posted anything in a bit đ. I hope this is enjoyable to someone? You darlings please stay safe, happy, healthy and of course lovely as always. đ)
#dc comics#dcu#bruce wayne#bruce wayne is a good dad#bruce loves his kids#alfred pennyworth#dick grayson#jason todd#damian wayne#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#barbara gordon#kate kane#superman#clark kent#batman#dc robin#superbat#omegaverse#alpha beta omega#omega bruce wayne#batfamily#fluff#fluff and feels
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keigo takami Ă reader | minors dni
tags : fluff, slight angst, love confessions, name reveal
warnings : implied sexual content
"I'm done in the bathroom." You announced, walking into the bedroom in some of Hawks' spare clothes. He says they're his clothes, but you know he got them for you. They didn't have the holes in the back for his wings, and they weren't his exact size. You've been at his apartment a lot over the past several months â it's been nearly a year doing this with Hawks. "You have some spare clothes in the basket there." You gestured to the door and picked up the discarded clothes. You threw your dirty clothes in the hamper next to the bedroom door. He'd wash them for you tomorrow.
Hawks didn't say anything, but he watched you clean up everything. As he stared, there was a certain feeling in the air, but you couldn't put your finger on it.
You turned to the hero and frowned slightly. "Hawks?" You asked, walking over to him and gently touching his cheek. "You okay?"
Seemingly snapping out of a trance, Hawks nodded quickly. "Yeah." He gave you a weak smile. "I'm fine. I'll get cleaned up in the bathroom." You nod and drop your hand from his face, watching him with slightly furrowed brows. The hero gave you a reassuring smile, but it seemed a bit tight. He looked distracted.
Hawks got up from his spot on the bed, feeling the blanket fall off his waist and reveal his naked form. He felt his face redden some as he grabbed the blanket to cover himself. You let out a small chuckle as you used the smaller towel in your other hand to dry yourself off and stepped out of his way. "Go ahead. Don't take too long, okay?"
Hawks nodded, the blush still prominent on his face as he practically scurried to the bathroom. You laughed to yourself at the sight, finding it cute. His serious demeanor in battle and carefree attitude with fans and the public were very different from these moments. Haws seemed more authentic and his real self. It didnât feel forced.
It was a comforting thought.
Half an hour later, Hawks climbed back into the bed with you, laying on his side to face you. You were on your stomach, scrolling through some videos. You looked up from your screen as you saw the hero lying beside you. A red wing draped over your body as he slid further into the bed. The feathers were soft but also a little sharp around the edges. Almost the opposite of Hawks. He had more rough edges than he let on. Like a piece of broken Plexiglas. He doesn't do much damage, but he can hurt you if you're not careful.
Hawks is the type you handle with care.
"How are you feeling?" You ask, voice airy and quiet as your fingers brushed through Hawks' feathers. The tips of your fingers played with the base of some of the smaller ones. A shiver made its way through Hawks' body, feeling your comforting touch on his wings. "Comfortable⊠and satiated, I think." Hawks let out a light laugh.
This one was very different from him usual laughs. Those were loud and casual. This seemed genuine and softer. Hawks had a gentle air about him in these moments. When the doors and windows were closed, the room was dark, and he was in bed with his favorite person - you.
It was comforting being with you. He knew he had so many secrets he couldn't dare share without putting everything (you) at risk. He loves the peace you give him. He loves how you make him feel. You're pure, divine love. You look at him without shame or anger. You're stronger than he could ever be. You've captured his heart and his soul. He loves you more than he'll ever love himself.
Hawks stared at you silently, allowing you to feel over each feather. It was comforting to have someone touching him so tenderly. It was like you loved him.
"I never expected this," you whisper as you're raking your fingers through his feathers. "You know that I'd be sleeping with the Hawks."
"Keigo."
"What?"
"My name. It's Keigo⊠Keigo Takami."
You stare at Hawks - no, Keigo - for a while, unsure of what to say.
"Wh - What? Hawks -"
"Keigo." He corrects, grabbing your hand in his. "Call me Keigo. Please." He practically begs. "I need to hear it."
After staring into Keigo's eyes for a few moments, you oblige him. "Okay, Keigo." His name feels heavy on your tongue, but it felt so natural to say. You could see the way the tension left his body. He looked vulnerable and almost scared.
"Keigo." You repeat, pulling your hand from his wing to touch his face. Keigo leaned into your touch and sighed, visibly relieved. He looked up at you with his cute, doey eyed expression. "Why did you tell me your name?" You question.
Keigo only shrugged. "Because I love you." He confessed. He said it like it was the most normal thing in the world â falling in love with the person he swore he wouldn't.
"KeigoâŠ" you said slowly, pulling your hand from his cheek - not missing his small pout - and began sitting up. You put your hands in your lap. "I thought we agreed not to fall in loveâŠ" You paused to look at him. "This is just sex⊠right?"
Keigo shook his head and sat up. "Not anymore. I love you, [Name]." He repeated himself. He reached a hand out to touch your shoulder, only to stop it an inch or so away. "Do you⊠not love me?"
You frowned at the pain - the desperation - in his voice. You finally face him, that same pleading look in his eyes. You stared back at Keigo, lips parted slightly as you tried to force the words out your mouth.
"Of course I love you." You whisper. "I justâŠ" You bit the inside of your cheek. "I don't know." You sigh. "I didn't want to lose this." You gestured between your bodies. "You've seen parts of myself I haven't shown anyone ever. I don't know what I'd do if I lost this⊠security."
A smile tugged at Keigo's lips as he took his turn holding your face in his hands. "It's like for me too." He whispered. "You're my first everything, [Name]. You're the first person I've loved and I want you to know that. I want this to be more than sex, more than casualâŠ"
Keigo grabbed your hand into his and kissed the back of it. "I want to be yours." He looked up at you through his eyelashes, his smile growing. He looked like such a dork like that.
A sweet, romantic dork.
"Are you sure? What about everything we wanted to avoid? The press, crazed fansâŠ" You frown, the worry digging into you. You had an agreement. Throwing caution to the wind seemed like a bad idea.
But to be with Hawks? To be with Keigo? The man who just shared a sacred part of himself with you? You'd take that chance.
"We'll figure it out, [Name]." Keigo whispered, lowering your joined hands and leaning in slightly. "You're smart and I'm optimistic." He tilted his head as a lopsided smile pulled at his lips. "We're a powerhouse, dove."
A short laugh escapes your lips. "A powerhouse, huh?" You raise an eyebrow and lightly bonk your forehead on his. Keigo pouted before nodding. "Yes."
"I guess that wouldn't be too bad." You agree.
"It'll be amazing, my dove." Keigo promised, leaning in to finally kiss you as your boyfriend.
Your boyfriend.
Your Keigo.
#đȘ¶ writing#takami keigo#keigo takami#keigo takami x reader#keigo x reader#hawks x reader#mha hawks#bnha hawks#mha x reader#bnha x reader#gn reader
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you know what's crazy?
i think most of us are aware that the song that plays over the monologue is titled "You're The Heart", but for a second lets think logically. if the monologue is truly just mike confessing is true love, and this is setting up for mlvn endgame, and there is no deeper connection or involvement of will's feelings, why is that the name of the track that plays through the entire duration of the monologue??
like think about that. the song doesn't begin until immediately after mike says the first "i love you!". that is what triggers the song to begin. nowhere in the duration of footage the song plays over in the episode does anyone say "You're The Heart". will said that several lines before the song began. kyle and michael (OST producers) know this. they watched the exact duration of footage that the song would be playing over probably over 100 times. so why when naming this song did their minds go to WILL'S line that is said well before the song begins?? a line that directly ties back to will expressing his deep seeded love for mike??? why not name it "I Love You" as mike said it multiple times during the duration of the song and it was what el had been asking for all season, or "You're My Superhero" since that line supposedly encapsulates everything mike feels about el and was said during the duration of the song?? no, it had to be will's line. will's line that was not even said during the duration of the song. they named a song that plays ONCE during the ENTIRE SHOW after a line that WAS NOT SAID DURING THE SONG. if mlvn are endgame and will get married and have babies and whatnot, why does will have ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS?????? why is will telling mike he's the heart more significant than anything from mike's grand declaration of love to el, which had a whole OST track made for it?????? well, we all know why, but we're called crazy when we say it, so the question still remains.
like just picture that. kyle and michael watched mike's monologue, watched him say i love you nine times, watching him say he fell in love with her at first sight, and said "we shall name this song You're The Heart!"
not "I Love You"
not "You're My Superhero"
not "Love"
not ANYTHING from mike's long ass monologue
no, it's "You're The Heart". it had to be "You're The Heart". it had to be a line not even said during the duration of the song, a line that is representative of will's love for mike. will's line. will, who mike asked to be his friend on the first day of kindergarten, who mike feels is the best thing he's ever brought into his life, who mike has a special relationship with, who mike jumps to defend, who mike cares for so much that he tried to fight his own bully because he said something bad about will, who's voice mike recognizes even though no one esle does, who mike is extremely attentive to to the point he is the only one to notice will is being slightly quieter than usual, who's floor mike slept on so he could be there for him, who's bedside mike slept by when he was unconscious in the hospital, who mike asked to go crazy with him, who mike always speaks softly to, who's hand mike held when he was afraid, who mike can't stand being on bad terms with, who mike jumps to apologize and take accountability without having to be told or instructed, who mike biked across town in the rain to apologize to, who made mike mike cheese just by saying he wouldn't find new friends, who ruined mike's ENTIRE day by simply being quiet and a bit moody, who mike feels is different than his other friends, who mike feels hawkins isn't the same without, who mike wants to be a team with, who mike chooses to stand next to when the world is ending right in front of them. it had to be will.
sorry, was that a bit overboard?
anyways i think you get my point lol
#byler#stranger things#will byers#mike wheeler#byler endgame#mike wheeler i know what you are#byler analysis#milkvan is bones#anti milkvan#stranger things 4#byler music coding#stranger things music coding
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