#more remote work
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Despite all the issues he has with sleeping there is 1 sure fire way to get Steve to fall asleep and fall asleep hard and the best part is he hasn't noticed it yet so he doesn't know when Robin and Eddie are conspiring to get him to knock the fuck out
The one sure fire way is a full stomach and some cuddles and he's out like a fucking light
#it works even better when more of his favorite people are around#but only is theyre occupied with something that keeps them relitively quiet#because steve is still a guard dog and will wake up if something sounds remotely wrong#i love the idea of specificallt robin and eddie noticing the pattern#and using it against steve for his pwn gpod#steve harrington#stranger things#eddie munson#steddie#robin buckley#platonic stobin
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Thinking about this game when I eat, sleep and play this game
#fields of mistria#fom#fom march#fom celine#fom juniper#fom eiland#fom caldarus#fields of mistria fanart#video games#my art#sketches#sorry for being absent#now I can work remote so I can draw way much more
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thinking about soap finding employment as a postie after being medically discharged. it's solid work. respectable. keeps him focused and active. he really takes to it. it doesn't hurt that his route feels like window-shopping.
#soap#something something becomes infatuated with a pretty girl who lives alone. works remote. her desk is in plain view from the postbox.#walks her street on his days off. loiters. takes up smoking again if only to make it look more natural (it doesn't).#starts imagining himself coming home to her. dreams about it.#he wakes up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat halfway through her front door.#cw stalking
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This has most definitely been said before, but we were robbed of the core four quarantining on-screen together at Buck’s place. ROBBED I say
#we could’ve had it all#henchim#bestieism and being exasperated by all the#buddie#shenanigans#canonically knowing the sleeping arrangements even tho I fully believe buddie shared Buck’s bed while henchim claimed the couch space and#someone (probs hen) thought ahead and brought an air mattress#hen and buck cooking for everyone bc chim and Eddie (at the time) couldn’t cook well#grocery shopping#but as arguments about everybody’s weird preferences#NO PRIVACY#so everybody is calling dibs on Buck’s balcony to have private conversations w their families#buddie calling Chris together and henchim side eying them but ultimately not saying anything bc it was a stressful time for all of them#carpooling to work together and fighting over the aux omgggg and fighting over the tv remote like real siblings#Bobby asking how the roomies are doing living together and everyone just eying each other with fondness or exasperation depending on the day#I know we got crumbs from buck and chim living together but it wasn’t enough I want MORE#the siblings dynamic would’ve been immaculate with the added weird romantic tension from buddie like ???#I can’t find many fics about this scenario but pls Rec any (especially if they’re tagged oddly plssss)#hen Wilson#chimney han#Eddie diaz#evan buckley#Bobby nash#Christopher diaz#quarantine#covid 19#911#9-1-1#911 abc#9-1-1 abc
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We’ve been looking at this all wrong the entire time...
So my brain is a weird place that I don’t fully understand, but sometimes it connects dots and I figure something out that has been staring us in the face the entire time! Lets just say it explains so many things - right down to the very pointed use of tommy calling Buck Evan!
This all stemmed from me looking at colour theory and costuming for Buck and Eddie (and by extension Tommy) season 7 again, because I was going to try write the buddie costume metas for episodes 9 and 10 that I never managed to get done before we started season 8 I will hopefully get to those posts, but this post - while technically about Tommy and his costumes (yes me ant Tommy person writing a post on him I know!) it does also look at the costuming for Buck and to a lesser extent Eddie more widely across the season and what the colours used actually mean - getting some distance and some time on the season has been a blessing!
Im not going to go into it in detail, but, broadly speaking the show has given each character a signature colour - this doesn’t mean they wear it all of the time - but they do wear it a lot of the time and especially in key scenes - characters can have more than one key/ signature colour, and it can change and develop over time. We can ignore season 1 because it was a pilot season and very often shows won’t choose to establish a signature colour for a character (911 s1 is all over the place from a costuming perspective - because they had several designers working across the 10 episodes but since s2 we’ve had much more continuity with Alayna Bell-Price at the helm for most of it). So for example Athena’s signature colour is mostly black with white and khaki green also in the mix. She’s moved away from that subsequently - wearing less black and more white/creams but both colours are still staples of her wardrobe.
Eddie we all know mirrors Athena from a costuming perspective - his signature colours are also black and khaki green with some white/cream as well. The khaki green was much more dominant than the black to begin with - which played into his military past - that had evened out on the black and khaki front whilst the cream had stayed fairly steady, but now we’re also starting to see a little bit more of it as well as some darker blues. this mirrors Athenas own journey t healing - the more she heals the less Khaki we see and the more white/cream - Eddie is starting to follow the same path from a costume perspective.
Bucks signature colour has always been blue, but he also wears a fair amount of yellow and grey, so those are his three colours. He obviously wears a lot of other colours, especially white, but white has its own specific use in Bucks costumes that sits separately from his signature colours.
We all know about yellow/ blue and green blue colour theory - I’ve gone on about it enough (especially yellow blue colour theory and its queer coding) and others such as @lover-of-mine have as well. Well both yellow/blue and green/blue continued to play out in season 7, I’m not going to go into them in too much detail - there are posts on my pinned post that cover that much better and I want to get to the good stuff (and I know you all do too!)
We do need to remember that Buck and Eddie very very rarely wear blue and green in scenes together - if Eddie is in green Buck won’t be in blue, and vice versa - this is because of the ties to blue/green being Buck and Eddies break up colours - the colours they wear opposite their respective girlfriends when the relationships are ending. This is a little less set for Eddie - who actually wears white/cream much more when he’s ending relationships than blue or green - but the one time he has actively done the breaking up he was in green.
As I was starting to do a bit of work on the 7x9 and 7x10 metas, I ended up going back and looking over the Buck and Eddie costumes for the season as a whole, and how Tommy fit into all of that as well - as we’ve all been billing him as Eddie lite.
While I do still think there is an element of Tommy being Eddie lite, I don’t actually think that is what the show has been doing -that concept is a bit of a red herring. I’m sorry that this is likely to get a bit convoluted and wordy - but my brain is still reeling and incoherent so bear with me - I hope it all makes sense.
Right this post is super long so the rest is going below the cut! I hope you enjoy!
Because I was looking for Eddie and Tommy parallels in the costuming for the season, I had been looking at the choice to put Eddie in red/black for his dinner date with Kim and Buck being in green for the scene at Bucks loft, and the fact that back in 7x04 Tommy had been dressed in the same colours - a red henley which was shot with black giving it a red/black colour way. I naturally started looking at the other Eddie - Tommy costume parallels - and there are plenty - lots of the khaki green we see Eddie in - playing into Tommys own military background.
These are Tommy’s scenes - where he wasn’t in uniform of some description (which is a good chunk of his scenes to be fair)
7x04
at the hangar - white tee, greenish stone coloured shirt and a tan jacket with stonewash jeans
at the court - light grey marl cut off hoodie and bright blue shorts
at Bucks loft - red/black short sleeve henley and stone wash jeans
7x05
at the restaurant -dark khaki green shirt (I would also like to point out the blue green colour theory here with the addition of tommy having a blue phone case - which is relevant later I promise!)
coffee meet up - light grey henley and navy blue hoodie with mid wash jeans
7x06
karaoke club - navy blue short sleeved henley
7x10
light grey marl tee and greenish denim shirt
So what you can see from this is that besides the use of henley’s, the only time we get actually get direct reference to Eddies costuming is through the use of khaki green and his first outfit at the hangar. There is of course the direct parallel of the red/black colour way I spoke of before, but, beyond that if you look you’ll see that Tommys outfits actually parallel Bucks far far more. I would even argue the Henley’s are more similar to Buck than Eddie - because they are short sleeved and Eddies are invariably long sleeved.
Bucks colours are blue and grey - and so are Tommy’s - particularly in scenes that are 1-1 with Buck. What I’m trying to get at and will explain is that this has never ever been about Tommy being Eddie lite - this is all about Tommy being Buck - Buck’s subconscious if you will. (I know you all this I’m completely mad at this point - but stick with me!) I have a lot to say about all of this which will explain the why of it all and how we ended up here so we’re going to go through it Tommy costume by Tommy costume!
Lets start with the hangar scene - the most Eddie like Tommy looks throughout the entire season. this is very much intentional - this is about the red herring of it all, but it is also about Eddie (I’m not discrediting anything we’ve talked about regarding Tommy being Eddie lite etc - it is all relevant - but that’s what makes it such a good red herring!) and about Buck being an unreliable narrator. This is in part why we also still see Buck in his too short trousers and his white sneakers. This is his journey (the sneakers), but he’s still trapped in his old self at this moment in time - but aware that he doesn’t fit his skin anymore (as an aside I will be writing a post about Bucks trousers and their changing fit throughout the seasons at some point soon!)
Script wise the key lines are plentiful - the entire scene is full of double meaning. We get Buck stating that he is ‘happy where he’s at’ and Tommy’s response of ‘you’re thinking of changing things up’. viewed through the idea that Tommy is a version of Buck, this then plays out as an internal conflict - a battle about wanting what you already have - being happy with what you have, but also wanting to change things.
Eddie saying ‘you aren’t thinking of leaving us are you’ and Bucks response ‘I’m keeping my options fluid.’ Eddie needing reassurance that what they have isn’t going to change, while Bucks reply is about him not really being sure of himself - of who he is - keeping his options open because he’s figuring out if he wants to change - the line is said to and directed at Eddie so its about Buck keeping his options open about possibly changing their dynamic - becoming something more, even in the face of Eddie not wanting things to be different. Tommy stating in this scene that Buck doesn’t need to leave the 118 to get certified to fly - that its something he could do for fun on his days off - becomes even more loaded through the internal monologue lens - Buck considering how he can stay at the 118 and have the joy, fun and benefits of ‘flying’ when he isn’t at work - that he could fly with Eddie (Eddie going flying with Tommy to do something fun and date like is a very literal visual metaphor for Bucks internal monologue - showing him what it could be like if he changed things up). There not being three tickets - only two is also important - its again a metaphor this time about how if Buck and Eddies relationship changes - it would only change for the two of them - it would become a relationship that doesn’t have room for another in it. When I say that’s about Chris not being involved it sounds really harsh, but the reality is Chris cannot be a a part of Buddie - he cannot be a part of something romantic. it isn’t saying Chris isn’t important or central to Buck and Eddie - simply that he cannot be a factor in a romantic relationship - that has to be just between Buck and Eddie alone - its kind of about Eddie (and also to a certain extent the same is true for Buck) not being able to hide behind Chris anymore when it comes to Buck.
Fundamentally its all tied back to his death in season 6 (we even get the being struck by lightening reference from Buck just to bring that aspect home) and subsequent resurrection and rebirth (post linked on my pinned post if anyone wants to read it!). we have to keep at the front of our minds that Buck has died and that is still playing on his mind - its still influencing who he is and who he is becoming and it was all throughout season 7 - even if it wasn’t obvious or stated.
The basketball costume is actually the one that has always stood out for me - Its the most Buck outfit of all Tommys outfits. The bright blue shorts especially.
So in that scene, which we know is supposed to read as being from Bucks view point, not only are we getting golden haloed super happy bouncy Eddie - Eddie the way Buck sees him - but Buck is also projecting and seeing Tommy in the place he (Buck) has always existed in. It’s a visual representation of what Buck talked about with Maddie and Tommy replacing him in Eddies life. Its unreliable narrator buck in visuals he’s seeing Eddie replacing him with Tommy - occupying the same places Buck has and more - from the calendar to the basketball court.
But that’s actually wonderful, because not only does it give us information on how Buck views himself (as expendable/replaceable) and how he thinks others view him - because if he thinks he’s similar to Tommy (which for a purely visual stand point he is - Lou looks more like Oliver than Ryan) but it also gives us information about the reality of how much Buck is actually intwined in Eddies (and Christophers) life - its telling us that Buck is in fact on Eddies calendar (and therefore fridge - fridge magnet theory for the win!) and how much space and conversation he occupies in the Diaz’s everyday life.
So he isn’t actually seeing Eddie in Tommy at all - he’s actually seeing the version of himself he doesn’t think he is but wants to be in Tommy. The version of himself that takes Eddie to vegas etc - that’s the Buck that Buck wants to be - the one openly flirting with Eddie and taking him on dates etc. That’s why the vegas fight is so seemingly ott (especially when you think about the fact Tommy and Eddie have known each other a week or so at most by this point) its the grand gesture Buck wishes he could be making.
All of this also makes Bucks ‘attack on Eddie’ more telling (it’s still the boy pulling the girl he likes pig tails in the playground concept) because Eddie is being receptive to all of these advances by Tommy - adding further weight to the Buck being jealous of and threatened by Tommy.
Tommy is this version of Buck swooping in and doing all this stuff that Buck wants to be doing (subconsciously still at this point - willful ignorance be winning) but either didn’t know how to or didn’t know Eddie if would be receptive to. Remembering that this is all Bucks viewpoint of things its essentially Bucks brain showing him what dating Eddie would be like and Buck being Buck misunderstands what his brain is telling him (forever misunderstanding the assignment).
There is a second aspect to this and it ties into Tim’s comments about the hamster wheel Buck has a been stuck on and it being time he got off it - the hamster wheel is actually multifaceted and has more than one meaning. The most important is that the hamster wheel hasn’t ever been about his relationships or about the women he’s dating (or men now). The hamster wheel he’s stuck on is actually the fact that he’s built this strong relationship and family with Eddie and Chris - (you don’t find it son you make it) and its something safe and stable and predictable in his life. Getting off that hamster wheel is about being brave and moving that relationship - that family dynamic onto the next level - removing the platonic aspect of their family and making it a fully formed family for real - romantic love and all - so the ‘platonic’ family is the hamster wheel he actually needs to get off of.
The other aspect of Tommy actually being Buck and the hamster wheel of it all is that hamster wheels are solitary pursuits - the implication is that Buck is the one standing in his own way - and coming back to the basketball game we see that played out in the moment where Buck tries to literally run through Tommy - only you can’t act out at yourself, and Tommy is a literal solid unmoving barrier and Buck won’t get past himself by just trying to bulldoze his way through.
This all then plays into the final Buck and Tommy scene of the episode - in bucks loft. I already spoke above about the red/black of it all, but now with the added concept of Tommy being A version of Buck things start to become more interesting. The red/black of it all is a warning (and the poker date red/black velvet suit and eddies red and black suit from s6 actually play into this as well!) - its dark romance - ‘forbidden’ dangerous romance or love. So for Eddie and his date with Kim that meaning is very self explanatory. The two season 6 suits are also fairly self explanatory - for Eddie again its the dangers of looking for romance that isn’t on your own terms and for Buck at the poker game its about the danger of falling in love with the person you are when you aren’t being truly yourself. Tommy being a version of Buck and this concept is a little more murky - essentially is about a similar thing to his poker suit - with a twist - its about the danger of seeing more value and loving a version of yourself that ‘used to exist’ as well as a version of yourself that you think will make you more attractive to others.
We do also need to Talk about Bucks costume here as well - the fact that it fits him almost perfectly - he’s in well fitted if slightly loose jeans and a navy shirt that isn’t tight with buttons not clinging on for dear life (to the same extent). The colouring is still on the dark side - so its not entirely positive - much in the same way that other scenes with buck in a dark navy shirt are moments where things go a bit askew for Buck (think the taylor ‘I kinda love you for it’ scene from s5 as an example). The implication is that - before Tommy comes along Buck is at his most content with who he is - he’s fitting into his skin better than he has in a long while but it’s not perfect. This is key, firstly because of how the scene unfolds and secondly, because of how he is then costumed from here on out for the rest of the season.
I do also want to mention the yellow blue colour coding in this scene and that is mostly done through the lighting - Buck is in blue and the light behind him is always yellow - he is surrounded by yellow light. In contrast - Tommy is barely touched by the yellow light - not until Buck starts to figure things out - then we get him briefly touched by the yellow light - the rest of the time he is lit very cooly - which is in contrast to the warmth of the loft - and further plays into the idea of Tommy being a stand in for Evan - Evan who isn't loved and accepted in the same way Buck is - Evan who Buck needs to learn to love.
If we look at the script for this scene, it also fits in perfectly with the idea of Bucks internal monologue. Tommy and Eddie being ‘buddie’s’ making perfect sense is a literal aside to the audience telling them that Buddie makes perfect sense - but it is more than that. This is where I have to bring up the ‘Evan’ of it all. I know a lot of us shudder with horror because of the fact Tommy only ever calls Buck ‘Evan’ and how both jarring and rude it is. How it shows how little Tommy knows Buck. We’ve always known it was being done intentionally. Well, if we view the use of Evan through the lens of Tommy being a version of Buck and things become clearer. Because Tommy is basically the old version of Buck - the Buck who existed before he knew Eddie - before he joined the 118. And this is where the choice to bring back Tommy specifically for this role becomes a really smart one - because ‘Evan call me Buck Buckley’ was Tommys replacement at the 118. Tommy who has a problematic past that has never been dealt with on screen. This isn’t about the nature of the problematic past. This is the show playing on the idea of Buck’s software upgrades - before Buck 1.0 there was Evan, and using who Buck replaced at the 118 as a plot device to actually dig into Evan more so that Buck can deal with, accept and move on from Evan and become who Buck is meant to be.
Tommy saying he couldn’t replace Buck furthers this - because Buck cannot go back to being Evan - Evan can never replace Buck. invoking Christopher adds weight to this - because Chris never knew Evan - he’s only ever known Buck and Buck is ‘his Buck’ and irreplaceable. Tommy then stating his jealousy is about Evan feeling the lack of family that he grew up with - the recognition that as Buck he has made a family for himself - Bucks assertion that Tommy (Evan) was a part of it is valid - because without Evan Buck couldn’t build the family he has. The entirety of this conversation is about Buck choosing to ‘get to know’ his past (remember this is coming of the back of Buck crossing out the ‘LEY’ on his nameplate in s6 and his struggles with his parents acceptance in that season before the lightening strike), choosing to learn about Evan and embrace him as a part of Buck.
Bucks assertion that he was ‘trying to get [Tommys] attention and it being exhausting’ is part of that as is the confusion Tommy expresses. The choice for Buck to use the word ‘exhausting’ - it’s Bucks subconscious trying to get his own attention - its his subconscious telling Buck that he’s exhausting himself by not listening to what his inner voice is saying. It’s of course a play on Buck being called exhausting by other people (and is perhaps why he doesn’t have the confidence to listen to that inner voice) and that also plays into the Evan of it all and how Buck views himself. Tommys confusion also plays into that - bucks own mind is confused - it was getting ready to ‘pursue’ Eddie but now we’re pivoting into what is essentially self love.
The continued bringing up of Eddie also makes sense with the contact of Tommy being alt Buck - because Eddie Eddie Eddie fills Bucks heart and mind - Both Evan and Buck recognise Eddies importance if not his full relevance in this moment. The resulting kiss then becomes less about Bucks bi awakening (I am not diminishing the importance of that in any way shape or form - its a vital aspect of Bucks journey) and more about Bucks decision to pursue loving himself - this ties into his statement ‘it wasn’t about me wanting to leave the 118 - it was about wanting to get to know you’ - its about Buck wanting to get to know himself - on the other side of his death and resurrection. It’s a continuation of his comments about Natalia ‘seeing him perhaps better than he sees himself’ - it’s about Buck starting to see himself better now he’s died and essentially been reborn and bout Buck now being in a place where he feels ready to confront that idea of being reborn and becoming someone new.
At the restaurant in 7x05 we have Tommy in an Eddie colour, but in a shirt that is much more Bucks style. There is also the green/blue colour play with Tommy stating Buck isn’t ready and Tommys ‘mismatched’ clothing bears that up - the play is on Bucks lingering confusion and uncertainty about what he wants - is it the Eddie side of things we’re pursuing the self love of Evan aspect we’re looking to explore? The entire scene is not just about Bucks first ‘date with a dude’ its also about Bucks fumbled attempts at self love - at not getting it right - its why Bucks outfit doesn’t fit him- why they’re now too big and baggy (I wrote about this in my costume meta for that episode - which like all the other costume posts can be found linked on my pinned post). The innuendo about closets and Buck going into masculine bro mode is as much about his nervousness about being on a date with Tommy and being seen as it is about the fact that a man practicing self love is still taboo and so often met with derision - hiding that you are pursuing that is a kin to hiding queerness - at the start - until you get to a good place with it.
We side step into the Buck and Eddie loft scene briefly to look at Bucks confession to Eddie - I could write a whole thing on Eddies acceptance of Buck and its importance - but that is for a different post that isn’t already a million words long! what I want to mention in this scene is the why Buck can’t stop thinking about Tommy of it all - how it is essentially establishing the idea that Buck is starting to listen to himself. He can’t stop thinking about Tommy because it isn’t Tommy he can’t stop thinking about it’s actually himself - Evan - in a learning to love himself and embrace who he is and was kind of way - all being done through a bi lens. it is essentially about Buck doing the thing he needs to do to be ready for a forever relationship with Eddie - which is love and accept himself - all of himself and acknowledging that to Eddie.
Buck switches back to better fitting clothes for the coffee date - and tommy is now dressed back in Buck colours and no trace of anything resembling Eddie in sight - making it clear that Buck has chosen to pursue himself. To get himself to the place he needs and wants to be first - the line about not knowing what it is he’s ready for but being ready for something is key - its a very self love line, but it also puts a very clear time frame on things - it makes it clear that Tommy is not endgame - because Bucks choosing self love and embracing and understanding ‘Evan’ isn’t his end game but a part of his bigger journey - a part of becoming who he needs to be to achieve what he actually wants - to get him to his endgame.
Then we have the Karaoke - brief scene(s). There isn’t really a huge amount in these scenes. But I do want to point out two things - the awkwardness of Buck and Tommys hug - and how that plays into the tentative nature of Bucks self love journey - and also Eddies behaviour towards Tommy - and the way it was very very clearly a lot cooler than we saw in 7x04.
We all jumped on the Petty Eddie train - and I agree there is an element of that. But - there is also the fact we are not seeing that scene through Bucks eyes - its through external eyes and we are therefore seeing the actual reality of Eddie and Tommys friendship - in that it isn’t this heightened date like - flirty new love type relationship - its simply two people who are loosely friends. Its remarkably normal and no threatening - only furthering the entire purpose of 7x04 being from Bucks viewpoint and Tommy being an alt Buck rather than an alt Eddie. It also therefore serves to further establish the Buddie of it all (but we all already knew that!). Tommy is still in Buck colours and the short sleeved henley is still something I would put more into the Buck costume camp than the Eddie one - especially in this season!
The final Tommy scene and costume is the date at Bucks loft and the conversation about daddy kink. I still don’t like this scene (which has a lot more to do with execution and the script than the actual daddy kink of it all) but I am much more sanguine about it now that I understand what it is setting up.
Bear with me here I probably won’t make sense, but with the knowledge that Tommy is actually buck lite - a less good and developed version buck (Evan and in part the version of Buck that Buck himself thinks he is) the daddy kink scene actually becomes about setting up Buck addressing his past and his actual real daddy issues - because bucks past self sees his worth in those issues and without them it means both Evan and Buck have no worth. Buck confronting and dealing with them and choosing to forgive and move on means the end of Buck and Tommy because Tommy is no longer needed - he has served his purpose and Buck would be ready to start his future - Evan stays in the past and Buck completes his rebirth and closes his lightening strike arc.
Onto Bucks season 8 journey - Bringing Gerrard in to Bucks arc rather than the others who have far more connection to Gerrard now begins to make much more sense. Tommys past under Gerrard actually echoes Bucks past - in different ways and to vastly different degrees, but the parallel is there. S1 Buck being a play boy and sleeping around and not treating women especially well (objectifying them etc) because of his own hang ups - is a pale echo of Tommy being closeted and racist sexist and homophobic under Gerrard. Like I said before - Buck is a pale imitation to Tommy here and that’s intentional (more in a sec) because once Tommy is under the wing of Bobby when he takes over the 118 we see him begin to grow and change. Buck follows the same pattern - Bobbys guidance pulls him away from his destructive behaviours and sets him onto the right path (Bobby is arguably the birther of Buck - Look I could write a whole thing off the back of my death and resurrection of Buck post about Bobbys role as God - the heavenly father - in Bucks life and how that is the overarching theme of Bobby and the show but I don’t have the time tbh!) to ‘redemption’.
Bucks behaviour is very intentionally not as bad as Tommys behaviour, because if Tommy is the plot device meant to essentially represent Bucks subconscious and how he views himself, then the reason we haven’t been shown Tommy atoning for any of his past sins and behaviours is because Buck hasn’t forgiven himself for his own. Buck is his own worst critic and will self flagellate to a ridiculous degree - and again with him being an unreliable narrator - he views his past indiscretions as being the equivalent of Tommys - therefore in his mind he hasn’t yet done enough to deserve absolution (Buck and Bobby being father and son in this as well!).
Which brings me to s8 and the return of Gerrard and what Bucks arc is going to be (this is slightly incoherent and not fully formed - I’m still percolating!). Gerrard being central to Bucks arc - and Bucks push back is imo going to be about Buck taking a good look at himself and recognising/ facing up to and accepting his past. And that actually does come down to the daddy issues of it all. Because if Bobby is as good as Bucks dad - and allowed him (and his subconscious in the form of Tommy) to develop and grow - then Gerrard is Phillip Buckley (obviously a heightened more terrible version of reality in the same way Tommy is a much worse version of Buck) who parented Evan through apathy and taking the easy route - we saw Evan pushing back against Phillip in Buck Begins and being rewarded for it and thus establishing Bucks self destructive and self sacrificing pattern of behaviour. Acting out and getting hurt got him attention - so Buck acting out against Gerrard is this reduced and will ultimately have the same results just in an essentially more destructive way. This is is a good thing - because this is about Buck recognising that he is worth and acting out etc is detrimental to him progressing as a person - its going to actively prevent his self love journey to flourish (and this is why in part I maintain my belief that Tommy is going to, if not encourage Bucks behaviour, then at least tell him to go along with Gerrard demands - for an easy life and also part of why I don’t think we’ll see a huge amount of Tommy - at least to begin with - until we get to a point where Buck is really motoring on the self love journey and getting to the point where he needs to do some pre break up face to face conversations that move him forward!). It’s about forgiving and accepting his father for how Evan was raised - Bucks arc is going to be about forgiving himself and allowing himself to be happy, and he cannot do that if he doesn’t go through the Gerrard stuff - which is essentially a type of therapy. That’s also where I think the golf comes into it - it’s a metaphor for Buck building bridges, gaining understanding and accepting his past with his father - the metaphor of the driving range being the idea of standing side by side and performing the same thing, but landing in different places. There is also the concept of improving ones self and choosing to not repeat the mistakes of the past.
It also means the thing Tim said about Buck and Tommy becoming more comfortable with one another makes much more sense, and why he’d flip the question to talk about Eddie and about Eddie feeling a bit left out in the cold but not out in the cold! Buck is becoming more comfortable with himself and while he’s doing that and learning to be happy etc as I described above. Eddie is going to feel left out - because this is about Buck not Eddie - because it’s about Buck being ready for forever with Eddie - and Eddie ultimately cannot be a part of that journey - Buck has to do it for himself in the same way that Buck cannot help or be there while Eddie goes through his reckoning with the Catholic Church, and faiths place in his life and also dealing with the ghost of Shannon and his mother issues(because he has those and they are all set up to go in s8 - Chris being in Texas really sets that up nicely!
Bahaha Tim I’ve finally figured out your question answering methods and how they tell us all we need to know!!
All this to say - Tommy is actually alt Buck - not Eddie lite (I mean he is still also that but it’s a bit of a red herring) he is a plot device for the biggest thing about Buck as a character and it all means Buddie here we come!
Thank you so so much if you have read this epic piece of waffle - I hope you enjoyed and I truly look forward to hearing all your thoughts on this and to you being as insane about it as I am!
Tagging some people who asked (and some who didn’t but might be interested anyway!)
@spotsandsocks @exhuastedpigeon @lover-of-mine @fruityfirehose @leothil
@bewitchedbewilderedbisexual @theladyyavilee @livingwherethesidewalkends @craigyxo
@izzysbeans @buddiediaz118 @inell @hotshotsxyz @winterskydragonx
#Man I hope this makes sense!#kym writes meta#kym costume meta#sort of#911 meta#gonna make a mini post about this to as I don't know how many people will actually read all 1 million words that I'e written!!!#Tommy isn't actually Eddie lite - He's actually alt Buck!#imo it all fits better than the Tommy is Eddie lite theory#which still works and is part of it - but I think the Buck angle is the more compelling one and makes more sense in the wider show!#If I am remotely right about this I will be flinging myself into the su n and never returning to earth!#anti bucktommy#anti tommy kinard#just to be safe as I know I'll likely get hate for this post from them!#911 spoilers#evan buckley#eddie diaz#911 abc#buddie#my iinsane theories
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I love incorrect quotes‼️‼️‼️🗣️🗣️🗣️💯💯🔥🔥‼️‼️
Set during Sonic 1 when Tom is still actively annoyed by this kids existence 😭😭😭 Even though I adore their dynamic when Tom is actively trying to be a father to Sonic, I also love when he’s just begrudgingly being a dad (he’s enjoying their time together he just won’t admit it yet)
(More yapping in the tags bc I’m an absolute yapper it’s what I’m built to do)
#sonic wachowski#tom wachowski#sonic movie fanart#movie sonic fanart#sonic fanart#sonic incorrect quotes#movie sonic#sonic 1#sonic movie 1#sonic movie#since sonic never left green hills this just makes sense to me lmao#like really how much can you expect this kid to know when anything he’s learnt about has to have been either situated in a small town#or on tv#idk they would totally watch nature documentaries but idk if snakes would be a particular point of interest for either of them#I hc they leave the TV on for Ozzie when they’re at work bc my grandma does that with her dog lol#so that’s prolly when he watched like most stuff especially when he was still really scared of being seen#like b4 he got as comfortable as he did watching them all in the movie bc u knowww after being seen and hunted down once#he’s gonna be more careful the second time#especially given the consequences of the last time he was seen :(#I’m imagining him like running in quickly#grabbing the remote to change it#and then around the time when they’re gonna get back he switches the channel back 😭😭😭#bc the stuff they’d leave on for Ozzie would definetly bore the heck out of Sonic#rainy art
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as im struggeling with art at the moment (again ............. does it ever end or .. get better at least), maybe something i havent asked is how do people feel about demise actually? (whether that is canon or my interpretation .. though theres a alot of story to tell about the latter i havent gotten to ... feel free to ask about that too if you want lol) am i really that alone having him be my special little guy? i know theres few if any and most either dont care, dont even remember or actively hate him (i get it, i really do) but i do wonder :O
#ganondoodles talks#zelda#maybe i have asked this before but i certainly dont remember#brain feels like its on standby whether that is when im trying to do art or trying to work#it feels like when the battery for the TV remote is empty so you hammer the buttons and occasionally it does soemthing#but most times it doesnt and you just get more annoyed at it (and you dont know how to change the batteries)#...perfect allegory isnt it
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One thing I do think iwtv makes clear is that it's hard to hold the balance of power in a relationship especially if you're deeply traumatized by all the horrible shit that happened to you when you were young and powerless. You're never absolved of the greater weight of your punches when you lash out, even if you are lashing out for understandable or sympathetic reasons. You could have prevented it even if it would be so so much easier if you couldn't. Interesting that to my memory they almost completely erased Armand's meditations on the power/murder issues in maker/fledgling relationships but tbf showmand isn't really the type to monologue on that subject. Anyway Cladeline is the closest that the show comes to arguing you can navigate that kind of power disparity successfully but the tools it uses are very interesting to me. Madeline is a self actualized adult with considerable strength of will when she meets Claudia; despite her relative youth, and Louis being a significantly weaker maker than Lestat, she's not trapped in a baby bird body. One day she would presumably outpace Claudia in strength, and they both know it. In the interim, her ability to move through the world in the guise of an adult white woman is something of an equalizer. And still Claudia moves so carefully around her, makes herself emotionally vulnerable to her by giving Madeline her diaries to read, shares what information she has willingly and honestly. Tries to give baby vampire Madeline what baby vampire Claudia lacked and needed. Crucially, they both really like each other and are happy to be upfront about how much they value their relationship. No one's begging anyone else to stay; no one's bartering with their body and affection. I wish we had seen more of it!
#tbh I don't think it's remotely a coincidence that Claudia is doomed and she's the one who works it out#from a watsonian pov its not like they have decades or centuries to get sick of each other#from a Doylist one come on man you have to let her have it I'm simply not watching a show where in#addition to everything else she has going on Claudia isn't allowed one (1) good relationship before she dies#everyone else gets eternity to sort their shit out she's on a schedule#press says iwtv#and I wish we had seen more of it because I think it's an interesting relationship that enriched the show not because wholesome lesbians#which is such an insult to them Claudia is a mass murdering psycho#deeply enraged by her inability to embody the apex predator she is would be so good at being#Madeline is insanely selfish. her ass isn't just international it's interspecies#she shows up so ready to eat people
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thinking about the one month relationship that leads to a pregnancy and navigating the aftermath. this works for literally anyone but feels extra yummy with pope
#wellll with Charlie it would be like idk. a power play thing#he’s hitting it raw from the first date and has every intention of making you this housewife#okay jack abbot is so ready to be a dad even if he doesn’t realize it#would be extra cute if you worked with him and got to fall in love more while the pregnancy goes on#but pope. oh my god#being someone that he feels remotely calm around and#getting closer and slowly slowly opening up to each other and you only start sleeping together not that long ago and boom. knocked up#figuring out how to manage a brand new relationship and pregnancy with him would be sooooooooooooooo oh god oh god oh god
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Trevor got a new-n-pretty outfit for Sypha, and it only cost his literal blood, sweat, and tears. I did make a few creative liberties on this iteration of Sypha's design since I want to keep her very snug-looking, so I made a lot of the parts to her dress longer and poofed up the sleeves just so they match her descendants. :D
#also this way the ruffled part of the sleeves match trevor too don't you think that's kinda cute?#I've been thinking about letting sypha switch to a new default outfit so I can inch away from the nufleg one#(her design was the Only one I could remotely tolerate)#but also it would be nice to give her something more elaborate anyway now that she doesn't need to hide herself#this look may be the one I try to work into I just have to look at it a lot of times and see how consistent I can keep it#thank you again scary-killing-game for feeding the fans ever so well#doodle-daas#akumajou dracula#sypha belnades#anti netflixvania
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also essential workers and people paid hourly, but that's implied
#only in gotham#gotham city#just gotham things#in universe memes#srsly the buses were shut down and the roads weren't salted or plowed#and then they said yeah we're promoting your safety in an offical notice#like. that just made my commute infinitely more dangerous???#not everyone can just not work or work remote#ugh sorry#mack rants
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maybe i am the remote worker that executives and corporate real estate investors fear monger about. i saw a comment on the remote work subreddit that said something like “they think we all just roll out of bed at 10am, pretend to be online while we’re really at the gym, log off at 4, and stay in our sweats all day”
smash cut to me reading said comment while on the treadmill at the gym during work hours
#like. how did you know my whole itinerary#for legal reasons this is a joke and i’ve never done anything like that ever in my life#but hypothetically if you actually were more productive in a remote work environment#and you generally work efficiently#you might be able to get the same amount or more work done in 30 hours at home than you would with 40 in an office#so one could. THEORETICALLY. produce more while working less.#causing no meaningful harm or loss to anyone because the output is still meeting or exceeding the requirements#food for thought#again obviously i have NEVER experienced any of this firsthand. we’re just chatting right now
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I am very smart, because my wrist starts to feel fine so I forget my brace, but because it feels fine that's okay let's go lug large heavy objects through a hardware store
Hey why does my wrist hurt again, it was fine so I didn't need that brace, how could this happen
#kite rambles#i DID get it checked and the doc said it was probably just a sprain so wear the brace for a few weeks it'll be fine#and then i do shit like this and out feels wrong again and idk it doesn't really feel muscular#or nervous it's not remotely like carpal tunnel#so do i go get it checked again more thoroughly idk but my deductible resets in 23 hours so my timing is fantastic#and i work tomorrow so i can't even go do a walk in or anything#well. i do have sick pay so i COULD but we're so fucking short staffed would i feel okay doing that to them on a Monday#maybe a long lunch. hm.#time to sleep on it
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The idea that misogyny is a real axis of systemic oppression whereby men are privileged in some ways and women are subjugated in some ways is THE most baseline fundamental building block of feminism, and if you refuse to believe this then you are not a feminist. Like point blank, end of, you are not a feminist if you don't believe in institutional misogyny. Having some vague idea that women shouldn't be second class citizens does not make you a feminist
#oc#the point being that I'm not interested in discussing or debating any aspect of feminism with someone who doesn't or won't understand that#patriarchy privileges men and marginalizes women.#I'm no more willing to hear out your opinions on what 'real' feminism is than I am to hear out JD Vance's takes on childless women#we are not remotely in the same camp or working towards the same goal and I'm not going to pretend that we are
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from a post a week ago, and now apparently casey is going around calling himself 'calculating' after I implicitly placed him on the other end of that particular spectrum. I genuinely am unsure whether casey has ever used the word 'calculating' before to describe anyone. follow-up to me saying the casey/valentino dinner stonks were looking low, twelve years into casey's retirement, only for it to take a literal month before they eat dinner together. casey's contrarianism is on such generational levels that I'm now beginning to feel he's coming for me specifically
now obviously, there is plenty to be said about casey implicitly grouping himself in the 'mind' (dovi, pecco, valentino) camp rather than the 'ability' (dani, marc) camp. much to be observed about his self-conceptualisation. and just like the dinner thing 🤓🤓🤓 it doesn't contradict anything I've said ☝️ 🤓 because the whole point is that casey is the valentino rival who can best dip into valentino's bag of tricks. like, on the one hand you have the dichotomy --
-- but on the other hand, obviously you have casey's entire preoccupation with learning from valentino (x) --
-- AND you have casey whole THING about confidence and the hatred of being seen as mentally weak in any way, paired with this idea he has of himself of someone who is people smart and can read others well (x) --
-- and what you're left with is a collapsing of the boundaries (x) --
-- that neatly separate the two of them. as a dichotomy, it can be confounded. both of them are often happy enough to play into the whole 'ambition vs talent' framing that forms the bedrock of their rivalry because it does to some extent also reflect what both of them genuinely value. casey needs to have supreme confidence in his own natural ability, valentino likes to outsmart his competitors and is flattered by the idea of beating a rival as ridiculously capable as casey. they're not ALWAYS comfortable with it, they've definitely gotten prickly about it in the past... and casey in particular certainly doesn't like the idea valentino could get one over on him psychologically (notes from a girl who tried and failed to spell that word correctly about half a dozen times, which is perhaps the most embarrassing word for me specifically to not be able to spell)
been collaboratively workshopping a theory that part of why valentino appears to be so supremely unbothered by casey talking inordinate amounts of shit about valentino these past few years is that... fundamentally, most of the things valentino is being attacked for he doesn't exactly mind. substantively, casey's critiques have focused around 1) valentino making an enemy out of casey, 2) valentino not paying casey any respect, 3) valentino shooting himself in the foot by making an enemy out of casey, 4) valentino not doing enough to keep his fans under control, and 5) valentino using the media to make casey's life miserable. valentino could argue his case here and plausibly argue casey is misrepresenting a few key details, but fundamentally if casey thinks 2007-08 valentino deliberately antagonised casey outside of the scope of their on-track rivalry... well, whatever, rivalries are fun! if valentino is going to be portrayed as the bad guy in this rivalry then. who cares. and (3) is fairly obviously incorrect - it represents casey's idea of what he would have liked their rivalry post-laguna to have looked like, but it's also not going to bother valentino insofar as it's clearly wrong. makes it less likely it's something he's sensitive about, right. every story needs a villain, and my guess is that there's portrayals valentino would object more to than 'machiavellian dickhead'
on casey's end, obviously there's also an element of self-consciousness to casey struggling to find a word to describe himself. talent is the obvious one to go for... maybe just doesn't want to use that as his word. when jorge recently described his fellow aliens, he associated dani with his incredible technique, marc with his fearlessness, casey with his unconventional talent and capacity for improvisation, and valentino with his intelligence, charisma and lucidity when racing. to be honest, if I were doing this exercise for casey, I too would probably tend towards that improvisational ability first and foremost - adaptable, maybe. the words he uses for doohan and fabio respectively, stubborn and resilient, also would be fairly close to the top of my list. so idk, isn't it interesting he goes the other way!! such a fun lil nugget that taps into his self-conceptualisation - and from the pov of the casey/valentino rivalry, something about how he recognises in himself the traits he begrudgingly respected in valentino. this is why they're so fun, right:
but casey's timing is still funny. did also give that post-ranch interview on the same day as I posted about how he'd soon go back to slagging valentino off, which I still fully believe but didn't pick a great time to talk about. give it a rest, man
#what's the market for a casey/vale web weave using agassi/sampras quotes. is there a market. pls tell me there's a market#theyre so tennis rivalry coded tbh like i know exactly in my mind how that version of them would work#also pecco/casey stonks continue to flourish#//#brr brr#//ht#nyhhhh society if more than half a dozen people were remotely interested in casey's interiority. what a waste#anyway next motogp essay already sketched out in my head and i'll integrate this stuff properly there. it's very curse-centric#it's funny actually i was thinking how persuasive casey has become. i was rewatching bits of that interminably long podcast -#- and he really sells you on it. he sounds SO reasonable even when you know he's not being entirely honest it's very funny#//brr brr
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Making writing progress !!!!!!!!!
#i have to keep gripping the edge of the counter and repeating that i am literally writing 5x more my usual output for 5 months straight#while working full time and working hard at something else that drains me#being sooo much more social than i was in school/remotely#but im also glad to make some fun writing progress :')#only a few words at a time but some of the drabbles are taking shape and its feeling like progress fr lol#💪😎💥💯✍️#rose rambles
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