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This has most definitely been said before, but we were robbed of the core four quarantining on-screen together at Buckās place. ROBBED I say
#we couldāve had it all#henchim#bestieism and being exasperated by all the#buddie#shenanigans#canonically knowing the sleeping arrangements even tho I fully believe buddie shared Buckās bed while henchim claimed the couch space and#someone (probs hen) thought ahead and brought an air mattress#hen and buck cooking for everyone bc chim and Eddie (at the time) couldnāt cook well#grocery shopping#but as arguments about everybodyās weird preferences#NO PRIVACY#so everybody is calling dibs on Buckās balcony to have private conversations w their families#buddie calling Chris together and henchim side eying them but ultimately not saying anything bc it was a stressful time for all of them#carpooling to work together and fighting over the aux omgggg and fighting over the tv remote like real siblings#Bobby asking how the roomies are doing living together and everyone just eying each other with fondness or exasperation depending on the day#I know we got crumbs from buck and chim living together but it wasnāt enough I want MORE#the siblings dynamic wouldāve been immaculate with the added weird romantic tension from buddie like ???#I canāt find many fics about this scenario but pls Rec any (especially if theyāre tagged oddly plssss)#hen Wilson#chimney han#Eddie diaz#evan buckley#Bobby nash#Christopher diaz#quarantine#covid 19#911#9-1-1#911 abc#9-1-1 abc
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Weāve been looking at this all wrong the entire time...
So my brain is a weird place that I donāt fully understand, but sometimes it connects dots and I figure something out that has been staring us in the face the entire time! Lets just say it explains so many things - right down to the very pointed use of tommy calling Buck Evan!
This all stemmed from me looking at colour theory and costuming for Buck and Eddie (and by extension Tommy) season 7 again, because I was going to try write the buddie costume metas for episodes 9 and 10 that I never managed to get done before we started season 8 I will hopefully get to those posts, but this post - while technically about Tommy and his costumes (yes me ant Tommy person writing a post on him I know!) it does also look at the costuming for Buck and to a lesser extent Eddie more widely across the season and what the colours used actually mean - getting some distance and some time on the season has been a blessing!
Im not going to go into it in detail, but, broadly speaking the show has given each character a signature colour - this doesnāt mean they wear it all of the time - but they do wear it a lot of the time and especially in key scenes - characters can have more than one key/ signature colour, and it can change and develop over time. We can ignore season 1 because it was a pilot season and very often shows wonāt choose to establish a signature colour for a character (911 s1 is all over the place from a costuming perspective - because they had several designers working across the 10 episodes but since s2 weāve had much more continuity with Alayna Bell-Price at the helm for most of it). So for example Athenaās signature colour is mostly black with white and khaki green also in the mix. Sheās moved away from that subsequently - wearing less black and more white/creams but both colours are still staples of her wardrobe.
Eddie we all know mirrors Athena from a costuming perspective - his signature colours are also black and khaki green with some white/cream as well. The khaki green was much more dominant than the black to begin with - which played into his military past -Ā that had evened out on the black and khaki front whilst the cream had stayed fairly steady, but now weāre also starting to see a little bit more of it as well as some darker blues. this mirrors Athenas own journey t healing - the more she heals the less Khaki we see and the more white/cream - Eddie is starting to follow the same path from a costume perspective.Ā
Bucks signature colour has always been blue, but he also wears a fair amount of yellow and grey, so those are his three colours. He obviously wears a lot of other colours, especially white, but white has its own specific use in Bucks costumes that sits separately from his signature colours.Ā
We all know about yellow/ blue and green blue colour theory - Iāve gone on about it enough (especially yellow blue colour theory and its queer coding) and others such as @lover-of-mine have as well. Well both yellow/blue and green/blue continued to play out in season 7, Iām not going to go into them in too much detail - there are posts on my pinned post that cover that much better and I want to get to the good stuff (and I know you all do too!)Ā
We do need to remember that Buck and Eddie very very rarely wear blue and green in scenes together - if Eddie is in green Buck wonāt be in blue, and vice versa - this is because of the ties to blue/green being Buck and Eddies break up colours - the colours they wear opposite their respective girlfriends when the relationships are ending. This is a little less set for Eddie - who actually wears white/cream much more when heās ending relationships than blue or green - but the one time he has actively done the breaking up he was in green.
As I was starting to do a bit of work on the 7x9 and 7x10 metas, I ended up going back and looking over the Buck and Eddie costumes for the season as a whole, and how Tommy fit into all of that as well - as weāve all been billing him as Eddie lite.
While I do still think there is an element of Tommy being Eddie lite, I donāt actually think that is what the show has been doing -that concept is a bit of a red herring. Iām sorry that this is likely to get a bit convoluted and wordy - but my brain isĀ still reeling and incoherent so bear with me - I hope it all makes sense.
Right this post is super long so the rest is going below the cut! I hope you enjoy!
Because I was looking for Eddie and Tommy parallels in the costuming for the season, I had been looking at the choice to put Eddie in red/black for his dinner date with Kim and Buck being in green for the scene at Bucks loft, and the fact that back in 7x04 Tommy had been dressed in the same colours - a red henley which was shot with black giving it a red/black colour way. I naturally started looking at the other Eddie - Tommy costume parallels - and there are plenty - lots of the khaki green we see Eddie in - playing into Tommys own military background.
These are Tommyās scenes - where he wasnāt in uniform of some description (which is a good chunk of his scenes to be fair)Ā
7x04Ā
at the hangar - white tee, greenish stone coloured shirt and a tan jacket with stonewash jeans
at the court - light grey marl cut off hoodie and bright blue shorts
at Bucks loft - red/black short sleeve henley and stone wash jeans
7x05
at the restaurant -dark khaki green shirt (I would also like to point out the blue green colour theory here with the addition of tommy having a blue phone case - which is relevant later I promise!)
coffee meet up - light grey henley and navy blue hoodie with mid wash jeans
7x06
karaoke club - navy blue short sleeved henley
7x10
light grey marl tee and greenish denim shirtĀ
So what you can see from this is that besides the use of henleyās, the only time we get actually get direct reference to Eddies costuming is through the use of khaki green and his first outfit at the hangar. There is of course the direct parallel of the red/black colour way I spoke of before, but, beyond that if you look youāll see that Tommys outfits actually parallel Bucks far far more. I would even argue the Henleyās are more similar to Buck than Eddie - because they are short sleeved and Eddies are invariably long sleeved.
Bucks colours are blue and grey - and so are Tommyās - particularly in scenes that are 1-1 with Buck. What Iām trying to get at and will explain is that this has never ever been about Tommy being Eddie lite - this is all about Tommy being Buck - Buckās subconscious if you will. (I know you all this Iām completely mad at this point - but stick with me!) I have a lot to say about all of this which will explain the why of it all and how we ended up here so weāre going to go through it Tommy costume by Tommy costume!
Lets start with the hangar scene - the most Eddie like Tommy looks throughout the entire season. this is very much intentional - this is about the red herring of it all, but it is also about Eddie (Iām not discrediting anything weāve talked about regarding Tommy being Eddie lite etc - it is all relevant - but thatās what makes it such a good red herring!) and about Buck being an unreliable narrator. This is in part why we also still see Buck in his too short trousers and his white sneakers. This is his journey (the sneakers), but heās still trapped in his old self at this moment in time - but aware that he doesnāt fit his skin anymore (as an aside I will be writing a post about Bucks trousers and their changing fit throughout the seasons at some point soon!)
Script wise the key lines are plentiful - the entire scene is full of double meaning. We get Buck stating that he is āhappy where heās atā and Tommyās response of āyouāre thinking of changing things upā. viewed through the idea that Tommy is a version of Buck, this then plays out as an internal conflict - a battle about wanting what you already have - being happy with what you have, but also wanting to change things.
Eddie saying āyou arenāt thinking of leaving us are youā and Bucks response āIām keeping my options fluid.ā Eddie needing reassurance that what they have isnāt going to change, while Bucks reply is about him not really being sure of himself - of who he is - keeping his options open because heās figuring out if he wants to change - the line is said to and directed at Eddie so its about Buck keeping his options open about possibly changing their dynamic - becoming something more, even in the face of Eddie not wanting things to be different.Ā Tommy stating in this scene that Buck doesnāt need to leave the 118 to get certified to fly - that its something he could do for fun on his days off - becomes even more loaded through the internal monologue lens - Buck considering how he can stay at the 118 and have the joy, fun and benefits of āflyingā when he isnāt at work - that he could fly with Eddie (Eddie going flying with Tommy to do something fun and date like is a very literal visual metaphor for Bucks internal monologue - showing him what it could be like if he changed things up). There not being three tickets - only two is also important - its again a metaphor this time about how if Buck and Eddies relationship changes - it would only change for the two of them - it would become a relationship that doesnāt have room for another in it. When I say thatās about Chris not being involved it sounds really harsh, but the reality is Chris cannot be a a part of Buddie - he cannot be a part of something romantic. it isnāt saying Chris isnāt important or central to Buck and Eddie - simply that he cannot be a factor in a romantic relationship - that has to be just between Buck and Eddie alone - its kind of about Eddie (and also to a certain extent the same is true for Buck) not being able to hide behind Chris anymore when it comes to Buck.
Fundamentally its all tied back to his death in season 6 (we even get the being struck by lightening reference from Buck just to bring that aspect home) and subsequent resurrection and rebirthĀ (post linked on my pinned post if anyone wants to read it!). we have to keep at the front of our minds that Buck has died and that is still playing on his mind - its still influencing who he is and who he is becoming and it was all throughout season 7 - even if it wasnāt obvious or stated.
The basketball costume is actually the one that has always stood out for me - Its the most Buck outfit of all Tommys outfits. The bright blue shorts especially.Ā
So in that scene, which we know is supposed to read as being from Bucks view point, not only are we getting golden haloed super happy bouncy Eddie - Eddie the way Buck sees him -Ā but Buck is also projecting and seeing Tommy in the place he (Buck) has always existed in. Itās a visual representation of what Buck talked about with Maddie and Tommy replacing him in Eddies life.Ā Its unreliable narrator buck in visuals heās seeing Eddie replacing him with Tommy - occupying the same places Buck has and more - from the calendar to the basketball court.
But thatās actually wonderful, because not only does it give us information on how Buck views himself (as expendable/replaceable) and how he thinks others view him - because if he thinks heās similar to Tommy (which for a purely visual stand point he is - Lou looks more like Oliver than Ryan) but it also gives us information about the reality of how much Buck is actually intwined in Eddies (and Christophers) life - its telling us that Buck is in fact on Eddies calendar (and therefore fridge - fridge magnet theory for the win!) and how much space and conversation he occupies in the Diazās everyday life.
So he isnāt actually seeing Eddie in Tommy at all - heās actually seeing the version of himself he doesnāt think he is but wants to be in Tommy. The version of himself that takes Eddie to vegas etc - thatās the Buck that Buck wants to be - the one openly flirting with Eddie and taking him on dates etc. Thatās why the vegas fight is so seemingly ott (especially when you think about the fact Tommy and Eddie have known each other a week or so at most by this point) its the grand gesture Buck wishes he could be making.
All of this also makes Bucks āattack on Eddieā more telling (itās still the boy pulling the girl he likes pig tails in the playground concept) because Eddie is being receptive to all of these advances by Tommy - adding further weight to the Buck being jealous of and threatened by Tommy.Ā
Tommy is this version of Buck swooping in and doing all this stuff that Buck wants to be doing (subconsciously still at this point - willful ignorance be winning) but either didnāt know how to or didnāt know Eddie if would be receptive to. Remembering that this is all Bucks viewpoint of things its essentially Bucks brain showing him what dating Eddie would be like and Buck being Buck misunderstands what his brain is telling him (forever misunderstanding the assignment).
There is a second aspect to this and it ties into Timās comments about the hamster wheel Buck has a been stuck on and it being time he got off it - the hamster wheel is actually multifaceted and has more than one meaning. The most important is that the hamster wheel hasnāt ever been about his relationships or about the women heās dating (or men now). The hamster wheel heās stuck on is actually the fact that heās built this strong relationship and family with Eddie and Chris - (you donāt find it son you make it) and its something safe and stable and predictable in his life. Getting off that hamster wheel is about being brave and moving that relationship - that family dynamic onto the next level - removing the platonic aspect of their family and making it a fully formed family for real - romantic love and all - so the āplatonicā family is the hamster wheel he actually needs to get off of.Ā
The other aspect of Tommy actually being Buck and the hamster wheel of it all is that hamster wheels are solitary pursuits - the implication is that Buck is the one standing in his own way - and coming back to the basketball game we see that played out in the moment where Buck tries to literally run through Tommy - only you canāt act out at yourself, and Tommy is a literal solid unmoving barrier and Buck wonāt get past himself by just trying to bulldoze his way through.
This all then plays into the final Buck and Tommy scene of the episode - in bucks loft. I already spoke above about the red/black of it all, but now with the added concept of Tommy being A version of Buck things start to become more interesting. The red/black of it all is a warning (and the poker date red/black velvet suit and eddies red and black suit from s6 actually play into this as well!) - its dark romance - āforbiddenā dangerous romance or love. So for Eddie and his date with Kim that meaning is very self explanatory. The two season 6 suits are also fairly self explanatory - for Eddie again its the dangers of looking for romance that isnāt on your own terms and for Buck at the poker game its about the danger of falling in love with the person you are when you arenāt being truly yourself. Tommy being a version of Buck and this concept is a little more murky - essentially is about a similar thing to his poker suit - with a twist - its about the danger of seeing more value and loving a version of yourself that āused to existā as well as a version of yourself that you think will make you more attractive to others.
We do also need to Talk about Bucks costume here as well - the fact that it fits him almost perfectly - heās in well fitted if slightly loose jeans and a navy shirt that isnāt tight with buttons not clinging on for dear life (to the same extent). The colouring is still on the dark side - so its not entirely positive - much in the same way that other scenes with buck in a dark navy shirt are moments where things go a bit askew for Buck (think theĀ taylor āI kinda love you for itā scene from s5 as an example). The implication is that - before Tommy comes along Buck is at his most content with who he is - heās fitting into his skin better than he has in a long while but itās not perfect. This is key, firstly because of how the scene unfolds and secondly, because of how he is then costumed from here on out for the rest of the season.
I do also want to mention the yellow blue colour coding in this scene and that is mostly done through the lighting - Buck is in blue and the light behind him is always yellow - he is surrounded by yellow light. In contrast - Tommy is barely touched by the yellow light - not until Buck starts to figure things out - then we get him briefly touched by the yellow light - the rest of the time he is lit very cooly - which is in contrast to the warmth of the loft - and further plays into the idea of Tommy being a stand in for Evan - Evan who isn't loved and accepted in the same way Buck is - Evan who Buck needs to learn to love.
If we look at the script for this scene, it also fits in perfectly with the idea of Bucks internal monologue.Ā Tommy and Eddie being ābuddieāsā making perfect sense is a literal aside to the audience telling them that Buddie makes perfect sense - but it is more than that. This is where I have to bring up the āEvanā of it all. I know a lot of us shudder with horror because of the fact Tommy only ever calls Buck āEvanā and how both jarring and rude it is. How it shows how little Tommy knows Buck. Weāve always known it was being done intentionally. Well, if we view the use of Evan through the lens of Tommy being a version of Buck and things become clearer.Ā Because Tommy is basically the old version of Buck - the Buck who existed before he knew Eddie - before he joined the 118. And this is where the choice to bring back Tommy specifically for this role becomes a really smart one - because āEvan call me Buck Buckleyā was Tommys replacement at the 118. Tommy who has a problematic past that has never been dealt with on screen. This isnāt about the nature of the problematic past. This is the show playing on the idea of Buckās software upgrades - before Buck 1.0 there was Evan, and using who Buck replaced at the 118 as a plot device to actually dig into Evan more so that Buck can deal with, accept and move on from Evan and become who Buck is meant to be.
Tommy saying he couldnāt replace Buck furthers this - because Buck cannot go back to being Evan - Evan can never replace Buck. invoking Christopher adds weight to this - because Chris never knew Evan - heās only ever known Buck and Buck is āhis Buckā and irreplaceable. Tommy then stating his jealousy is about Evan feeling the lack of family that he grew up with - the recognition that as Buck he has made a family for himself - Bucks assertion that Tommy (Evan) was a part of it is valid - because without Evan Buck couldnāt build the family he has. The entirety of this conversation is about Buck choosing to āget to knowā his past (remember this is coming of the back of Buck crossing out the āLEYā on his nameplate in s6 and his struggles with his parents acceptance in that season before the lightening strike), choosing to learn about Evan and embrace him as a part of Buck. Ā
Bucks assertion that he was ātrying to get [Tommys] attention and it being exhaustingā is part of that as is the confusion Tommy expresses. The choice for Buck to use the word āexhaustingā - itās Bucks subconscious trying to get his own attention - its his subconscious telling Buck that heās exhausting himself by not listening to what his inner voice is saying. Itās of course a play on Buck being called exhausting by other people (and is perhaps why he doesnāt have the confidence to listen to that inner voice) and that also plays into the Evan of it all and how Buck views himself. Tommys confusion also plays into that - bucks own mind is confused - it was getting ready to āpursueā Eddie but now weāre pivoting into what is essentially self love.
The continued bringing up of Eddie also makes sense with the contact of Tommy being alt Buck - because Eddie Eddie Eddie fills Bucks heart and mind - Both Evan and Buck recognise Eddies importance if not his full relevance in this moment. The resulting kiss then becomes less about Bucks bi awakening (I am not diminishing the importance of that in any way shape or form - its a vital aspect of Bucks journey) and more about Bucks decision to pursue loving himself - this ties into his statement āit wasnāt about me wanting to leave the 118 - it was about wanting to get to know youā - its about Buck wanting to get to know himself - on the other side of his death and resurrection. Itās a continuation of his comments about Natalia āseeing him perhaps better than he sees himselfā - itās about Buck starting to see himself better now heās died and essentially been reborn and bout Buck now being in a place where he feels ready to confront that idea of being reborn and becoming someone new.
At the restaurant in 7x05 we have Tommy in an Eddie colour, but in a shirt that is much more Bucks style. There is also the green/blue colour play with Tommy stating Buck isnāt ready and Tommys āmismatchedā clothing bears that up - the play is on Bucks lingering confusion and uncertainty about what he wants - is it the Eddie side of things weāre pursuing the self love of Evan aspect weāre looking to explore? The entire scene is not just about Bucks first ādate with a dudeā its also about Bucks fumbled attempts at self love - at not getting it right - its why Bucks outfit doesnāt fit him- why theyāre now too big and baggy (I wrote about this in my costume meta for that episode - which like all the other costume posts can be found linked on my pinned post).Ā The innuendo about closets and Buck going into masculine bro mode is as much about his nervousness about being on a date with Tommy and being seen as it is about the fact that a man practicing self love is still taboo and so often met with derision - hiding that you are pursuing that is a kin to hiding queerness - at the start - until you get to a good place with it.
We side step into the Buck and Eddie loft scene briefly to look at Bucks confession to Eddie - I could write a whole thing on Eddies acceptance of Buck and its importance - but that is for a different post that isnāt already a million words long! what I want to mention in this scene is the why Buck canāt stop thinking about Tommy of it all - how it is essentially establishing the idea that Buck is starting to listen to himself.Ā He canāt stop thinking about Tommy because it isnāt Tommy he canāt stop thinking about itās actually himself - Evan - in a learning to love himself and embrace who he is and was kind of way - all being done through a bi lens. it is essentially about Buck doing the thing he needs to do to be ready for a forever relationship with Eddie - which is love and accept himself - all of himself and acknowledging that to Eddie.
Buck switches back to better fitting clothes for the coffee date - and tommy is now dressed back in Buck colours and no trace of anything resembling Eddie in sight - making it clear that Buck has chosen to pursue himself. To get himself to the place he needs and wants to be first - the line about not knowing what it is heās ready for but being ready for something is key - its a very self love line, but it also puts a very clear time frame on things - it makes it clear that Tommy is not endgame - because Bucks choosing self love and embracing and understanding āEvanā isnāt his end game but a part of his bigger journey - a part of becoming who he needs to be to achieve what he actually wants - to get him to his endgame.
Then we have the Karaoke - brief scene(s). There isnāt really a huge amount in these scenes. But I do want to point out two things - the awkwardness of Buck and Tommys hug - and how that plays into the tentative nature of Bucks self love journey - and also Eddies behaviour towards Tommy - and the way it was very very clearly a lot cooler than we saw in 7x04.
We all jumped on the Petty Eddie train - and I agree there is an element of that. But - there is also the fact we are not seeing that scene through Bucks eyes - its through external eyes and we are therefore seeing the actual reality of Eddie and Tommys friendship - in that it isnāt this heightened date like - flirty new love type relationship - its simply two people who are loosely friends. Its remarkably normal and no threatening - only furthering the entire purpose of 7x04 being from Bucks viewpoint and Tommy being an alt Buck rather than an alt Eddie. It also therefore serves to further establish the Buddie of it all (but we all already knew that!). Tommy is still in Buck colours and the short sleeved henley is still something I would put more into the Buck costume camp than the Eddie one - especially in this season!Ā
The final Tommy scene and costume is the date at Bucks loft and the conversation about daddy kink. I still donāt like this scene (which has a lot more to do with execution and the script than the actual daddy kink of it all) but I am much more sanguine about it now that I understand what it is setting up.
Bear with me here I probably wonāt make sense, but with the knowledge that Tommy is actually buck lite - a less good and developed version buck (Evan and in part the version of Buck that Buck himself thinks he is) the daddy kink scene actually becomes about setting up Buck addressing his past and his actual real daddy issues - because bucks past self sees his worth in those issues and without them it means both Evan and Buck have no worth. Buck confronting and dealing with them and choosing to forgive and move on means the end of Buck and Tommy because Tommy is no longer needed - he has served his purpose and Buck would be ready to start his future - Evan stays in the past and Buck completes his rebirth and closes his lightening strike arc.
Onto Bucks season 8 journey - Bringing Gerrard in to Bucks arc rather than the others who have far more connection to Gerrard now begins to make much more sense. Tommys past under Gerrard actually echoes Bucks past - in different ways and to vastly different degrees, but the parallel is there.Ā S1 Buck being a play boy and sleeping around and not treating women especially well (objectifying them etc) because of his own hang ups - is a pale echo of Tommy being closeted and racist sexist and homophobic under Gerrard. Like I said before - Buck is a pale imitation to Tommy here and thatās intentional (more in a sec) because once Tommy is under the wing of Bobby when he takes over the 118 we see him begin to grow and change. Buck follows the same pattern - Bobbys guidance pulls him away from his destructive behaviours and sets him onto the right path (Bobby is arguably the birther of Buck - Look I could write a whole thing off the back of my death and resurrection of Buck post about Bobbys role as God - the heavenly father - in Bucks life and how that is the overarching theme of Bobby and the show but I donāt have the time tbh!) to āredemptionā.
Bucks behaviour is very intentionally not as bad as Tommys behaviour, because if Tommy is the plot device meant to essentially represent Bucks subconscious and how he views himself, then the reason we havenāt been shown Tommy atoning for any of his past sins and behaviours is because Buck hasnāt forgiven himself for his own. Buck is his own worst critic and will self flagellate to a ridiculous degree - and again with him being an unreliable narrator - he views his past indiscretions as being the equivalent of Tommys - therefore in his mind he hasnāt yet done enough to deserve absolution (Buck and Bobby being father and son in this as well!).Ā
Which brings me to s8 and the return of Gerrard and what Bucks arc is going to be (this is slightly incoherent and not fully formed - Iām still percolating!). Gerrard being central to Bucks arc - and Bucks push back is imo going to be about Buck taking a good look at himself and recognising/ facing up to and accepting his past. And that actually does come down to the daddy issues of it all. Because if Bobby is as good as Bucks dad - and allowed him (and his subconscious in the form of Tommy) to develop and grow - then Gerrard is Phillip Buckley (obviously a heightened more terrible version of reality in the same way Tommy is a much worse version of Buck) who parented Evan through apathy and taking the easy route - we saw Evan pushing back against Phillip in Buck Begins and being rewarded for it and thus establishing Bucks self destructive and self sacrificing pattern of behaviour. Acting out and getting hurt got him attention - so Buck acting out against Gerrard is this reduced and will ultimately have the same results just in an essentially more destructive way.Ā This is is a good thing - because this is about Buck recognising that he is worth and acting out etc is detrimental to him progressing as a person - its going to actively prevent his self love journey to flourish (and this is why in part I maintain my belief that Tommy is going to, if not encourage Bucks behaviour, then at least tell him to go along with Gerrard demands - for an easy life and also part of why I donāt think weāll see a huge amount of Tommy - at least to begin with - until we get to a point where Buck is really motoring on the self love journey and getting to the point where he needs to do some pre break up face to face conversations that move him forward!).Ā Itās about forgiving and accepting his father for how Evan was raised - Bucks arc is going to be about forgiving himself and allowing himself to be happy, and he cannot do that if he doesnāt go through the Gerrard stuff - which is essentially a type of therapy. Thatās also where I think the golf comes into it - itās a metaphor for Buck building bridges, gaining understanding and accepting his past with his father - the metaphor of the driving range being the idea of standing side by side and performing the same thing, but landing in different places. There is also the concept of improving ones self and choosing to not repeat the mistakes of the past.
It also means the thing Tim said about Buck and Tommy becoming more comfortable with one another makes much more sense, and why heād flip the question to talk about Eddie and about Eddie feeling a bit left out in the cold but not out in the cold! Buck is becoming more comfortable with himself and while heās doing that and learning to be happy etc as I described above. Eddie is going to feel left out - because this is about Buck not Eddie - because itās about Buck being ready for forever with Eddie - and Eddie ultimately cannot be a part of that journey - Buck has to do it for himself in the same way that Buck cannot help or be there while Eddie goes through his reckoning with the Catholic Church, and faiths place in his life and also dealing with the ghost of Shannon and his mother issues(because he has those and they are all set up to go in s8 - Chris being in Texas really sets that up nicely!
Bahaha Tim Iāve finally figured out your question answering methods and how they tell us all we need to know!!Ā
All this to say - Tommy is actually alt Buck - not Eddie lite (I mean he is still also that but itās a bit of a red herring) he is a plot device for the biggest thing about Buck as a character and it all means Buddie here we come!
Thank you so so much if you have read this epic piece of waffle - I hope you enjoyed and I truly look forward to hearing all your thoughts on this and to you being as insane about it as I am!
Tagging some people who asked (and some who didnāt but might be interested anyway!)
@spotsandsocks @exhuastedpigeon @lover-of-mine @fruityfirehose @leothil
@bewitchedbewilderedbisexual @theladyyavilee @livingwherethesidewalkends @craigyxo
@izzysbeans @buddiediaz118 @inell @hotshotsxyz @winterskydragonx
#Man I hope this makes sense!#kym writes meta#kym costume meta#sort of#911 meta#gonna make a mini post about this to as I don't know how many people will actually read all 1 million words that I'e written!!!#Tommy isn't actually Eddie lite - He's actually alt Buck!#imo it all fits better than the Tommy is Eddie lite theory#which still works and is part of it - but I think the Buck angle is the more compelling one and makes more sense in the wider show!#If I am remotely right about this I will be flinging myself into the su n and never returning to earth!#anti bucktommy#anti tommy kinard#just to be safe as I know I'll likely get hate for this post from them!#911 spoilers#evan buckley#eddie diaz#911 abc#buddie#my iinsane theories
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&hi my ass is starting a NEW JOB today !! if u would like to congratulate me by sending a lot of oc questions to be ambushed with when im home in 8 hours that would be really funny (preferably stuff i can answer via text instead of drawing just cause of Time and Energy but it's WHATEVER MANNNNNN)
#anonymous puzzler talks#anonymous puzzler originals#villain coded comic#new job is a lot like old job but more hours and i dont work remote no more :( have to actually dress nice now.....
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some messy young nikprice sketches
#i think back in the day price was super strict and brooding#cared a lot about his work and hated anything remotely silly#but over the years he began to realize that he'd be dead before he ever laughed if he didnt loosen up a bit#nik helped him a lot with that#and in turn price taught nik to be harderworking and more skilled#nikprice#nikolai cod#cod nikolai#call of duty#cod#cod fanart#art#captain john price
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Trevor got a new-n-pretty outfit for Sypha, and it only cost his literal blood, sweat, and tears. I did make a few creative liberties on this iteration of Sypha's design since I want to keep her very snug-looking, so I made a lot of the parts to her dress longer and poofed up the sleeves just so they match her descendants. :D
#also this way the ruffled part of the sleeves match trevor too don't you think that's kinda cute?#I've been thinking about letting sypha switch to a new default outfit so I can inch away from the nufleg one#(her design was the Only one I could remotely tolerate)#but also it would be nice to give her something more elaborate anyway now that she doesn't need to hide herself#this look may be the one I try to work into I just have to look at it a lot of times and see how consistent I can keep it#thank you again scary-killing-game for feeding the fans ever so well#doodle-daas#akumajou dracula#sypha belnades#anti netflixvania
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I know Iām months late to the Dream Tiger fad, but I hope it never dies.
My interpretation is that Tiger was the only one of its kind born without stripes, so it makes a questionable pact with a parasitic spirit/demon/whatever.
Sometimes Tiger looks ānormalā.
The rest of the timeā¦ not so much.
#dream tiger#artists on tumblr#sketches#my art#fanart#first non SF fanart on the blog yay#Iād also like to draw this in Procreate but I need more practice first#i drew this at work#sorry not even remotely sorry
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[ID: a digital coloured sketch of Raphaella la Cognizi as a bird-like creature, from waist up and in profile view. The picture is in brown and orange tones. Her head resembles the head of a barn owl, with wide, glowing yellow eyes, a small bump where a human's nose would be, and feathery "ears". Her mouth is slightly open, showing a beak instead of teeth. She looks like she's smiling deviously. Her neck is long, with long feathers that resemble light brown hair. One of her hands is visible, it is bird-like, with two opposing thumbs, each on either side of the hand. She has big claws. She is hunched and appears to be interested in something off-screen. Her big brown wing is open and covers up the rest of her body. End ID]
What if Raph was fucked up and kinda scary
#the mechanisms#raphaella la cognizi#body horror#? just in case#i didnt want to go owl for her but its the only bird face that looks remotely like a human face#otherwise im thinking vulture for her#i could have made her without arms. like just wings and legs. but that might look silly#inspired by dungeon meshi's harpies btw. theyre cool#might do more with this design i like how her face turned out i was really stuck on the previous times i tried drawing this type of stuff#anyway she basically has an owl type skull with a ābeardā. cause i needed to kerp her cool chin#unfortunately her nose got nuked. might toy with it a bit more#idk why im talking about this like ive worked this over dosens of designs. i doodled it past midnight and made stuff up as i went along#okay bye its 3am for and i have work tomorrow āļø#cat talks#cat draws
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There are only so many fanfics that use the entirety of DC as cardboard cutouts to prop up bat family characters that I can read before I go berserk.
I swear to god. Every character that has ever been shipped with a bat or coexists on the same team as a bat is owed an apology.
How many Young Justice fanfics that solely revolve around Tim must exist? How many Titans fanfics centered only on Dick? Why is it a herculean task to find a Justice League fanfic without Bruce as the main character?
And then even when you do find a fic that seems like it's balanced, everything still revolves around the bat. Like Kon, Cassie and Bart have nothing else going on in their lives except Tim and Tim's issues or thinking about Tim. Like Donna and Wally and Roy just cannot function if they aren't spending every waking moment thinking about Dick.
I'm... Guys. I'm at my limit. I swear to god. We need to make a Batman tag and surgically remove all these fics and quarantine them there. We'll keep the actual DC fics and they can do whatever the fuck they want in their own tag. It's getting ridiculous how hard it is to find fanfic that's actually DC related and isn't just 'The BatFam Show'.
#im going INSANE#i literally just have to filter out the batfam characters at this point#and even that doesn't help sometimes#holy shit guys what is GOING ON#seriously if i see one more fic thats all 'haha the justice league meets the batfam and they're so shocked! šÆ because they're crazy š¤£'#i don't know how to explain to you people that THEY HAVE SEEN WEIRDER#a bunch of ninja kids aren't even making the top ten weirdest moments my dude. like. at all.#not even remotely#i can't stress ENOUGH how normal that would be to them#anyway im going fucking bonkers over here#dc#dc comics#or god fucking damnit the YJ fics that literally just have Kon's life revolving around Tim#and Cassie and Bart are just background scenary. and only exist to push Kon and Tim together. I'm going to go fucking nuts#ship whoever you want but at least have the character have an actual character beyond 'love interest'#also jfc. every. single. birdflash fic. that has Wally just be a love interest with literally nothing fucking else going on#except his relationship with Dick. work? family? life? villains?? nope! no he's just madly in love with Dick and cute and thats it!#im GOING INSANE
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The idea that misogyny is a real axis of systemic oppression whereby men are privileged in some ways and women are subjugated in some ways is THE most baseline fundamental building block of feminism, and if you refuse to believe this then you are not a feminist. Like point blank, end of, you are not a feminist if you don't believe in institutional misogyny. Having some vague idea that women shouldn't be second class citizens does not make you a feminist
#oc#the point being that I'm not interested in discussing or debating any aspect of feminism with someone who doesn't or won't understand that#patriarchy privileges men and marginalizes women.#I'm no more willing to hear out your opinions on what 'real' feminism is than I am to hear out JD Vance's takes on childless women#we are not remotely in the same camp or working towards the same goal and I'm not going to pretend that we are
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I'm in the hamburger mines of capitalism and found out that my job is planning to try and outsource my position to remote randos across the country and I'm like. CEO-boy do you have any idea how many regulations I have to take into account not just on a state-level but also on a county and municipality level. None of which is information included in the training.
This isn't even a case where someone would fuck it up just cuz it's complex to get right, this is a case where someone wouldn't even know what they don't know. And it's a lot of information to not know they don't know, because these poor remote guys are going to be covering a bunch of states with finicky and ultra-specific building codes, not even just my own!
Anyways wish my store a very Rest in Piss when this comes back to extremely bite them in the ass, because it's gonna be funny as fuck.
#Like boiiii#I cannot explain how badly this is gonna go.#Like having a $15/hr position have to read the building codes of every state#and look into the regulations of the area every single one of their customers is in#when they're having a bigger workload than even I have....#this isn't just gonna be a clusterfuck where people's wallets and homes are tied up#this is also going to be EXTREMELY unfair to the remote workers themselves#because my job has outright stated that the position IS a downgrade/demotion for people on my position who wanna swap#so it's like. cool. you're setting them up to fail AND giving them more work AND paying them less.#asshole move!!!!#personal
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Yāall, please lend me your strength. Iāve been up since 6 am so I could be at a work conference that started at 7. The conference is ending soon but then I have to go out to dinner with coworkers. God gives His toughest battles to His strongest soldiers indeed š
#we also had a big social thing yesterday#working remote has made me even more of an introvert so itās been annoying lol#Iām handling it better than I thought I would! but I wish I could just go home after this conference#personal
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I'm nearly a month late to the anniversary but it's somehow been over a year since I published putting your fist through a thick sheet of glass (i know you don't want to) and I'm just feeling very emotional about it tonight to be honest. It's genuinely the most fun I've ever had working on a piece of writing and I miss it every single day. I'm not exaggerating when I say I've cried multiple time over the sweet comments folks have left. It's truly been the best fandom experience of my life and I'm so grateful that I got to share it with all the amazing people on here.
#and yes there is definitely (ahem) *more* in the works...#but i have no expectations or ideas about when that will be remotely closely to sharing more about#sorry to be a tease#ikydwt#tlt#the locked tomb#tlt fic
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Honestly, so many of my everyday struggles could be solved by having a remote job...
#Denmark needs to normalise remote jobs more pls#i wanna be sat in a cottage up north doing work#not commuting nearly 3 hours every day
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Do you do art full time?
iām very fortunate to be living off my art yeah! at least currently ā which iām incredibly grateful for because iām an extremely anxious person and every other job iāve had put a tremendous stress on my system and i was genuinely in such a bad spot every time before a shift lmao
#vic.txt#i think this is a good place to say big fat THANK YOU to each and every person who ever commissioned me or bought something off my inprnt/#teepublic#itās thanks to you angels i can work remotely doing what i love and not literally crying before every shift because i was so scared#i still canāt believe i get to draw for a living#my baby me who would rather draw than do anything else in the world would be so amazed#thank you thank you thank you and i hope i get to provide even more funky art to you in 2024!
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fully believe that the first time buck met karen (an actual rocket scientist!!!) he was so enamoured and amazed by her that he like wormed his way into their car on the way home just by non-stop asking her questions (as he had been for hours). and eventually hen had to stop him inviting himself into their house and be like "buck, i get it, i do, but you got to go your home now, sweetie"
#seriously#you can't tell me that buck isn't like in awe of karen#an actual rocket scientist !!!!!#that man let her talk to no one else at that party bc he had QUESTIONS#it took at least like 3 bbq's before he was remotely normal around her#and every now and then she mentions smth new at work and buck reverts to his little weirdo status#but she honestly finds it endeering#buck#evan buckley#karen wilson#hen wilson#911#911 abc#911 tv show#i just need more buck-karen content#(plus clipboard!buck could totally match karen's energy)
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idgaf what lauren faust say earth pony pinkie>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>pegasus pinkie FOREVER
#kae.txt#i know its her show but like....she dont see the vision and tha pains me (u_u)#ill say this forever but the g4 ponies races are perfect how they turned out and anything different i just dont think would work as well#earth pony twilight is the only change i am remotely interested in#a pegasus choosing to live on the ground and a physics defying earth pony is so much more interesting than a pony thats confined to the#ground cause she from birth Has to be and a physics defying pegasus....cause thats a flying horse#its 5am and im ranting about horses lemme go to bed
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