#more like my ideas for fics i will probably never do
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Gratitude
Pairing: The Salesman x fem!Reader
SEQUEL to City of Love. Probably not a good fic to read as a stand-alone; read City of Love first for context.
Word count: 5.5k
Warnings: smut (minors dni), dubious consent, rough sex after a fight, degradation, dom/sub dynamics, bruising, marking, pain play/sadomasochism, mirror sex, manhandling, hurt/comfort (but mostly hurt), lots of angst.
Tags: @apookalypse @thecutiepieishere / I do not have an official taglist yet, but I'd be willing to make one if people were interested. If you'd like to be tagged in my fics, or in any additions to this story, let me know somehow!
–––
It's three days later when you see him again, just when you were convinced he left Paris for good.
You knew it would take a lot longer for the reminders of him to leave your mind as well as your body. He's in the marks his hands left on your hips, in the scrapes and faint bruises along your back from when he tossed and squeezed you against the brick wall, in the ghost of his lips on your skin. You can still feel them every time you close your eyes, hear his voice whisper your name against your neck as he came.
It shouldn't surprise you, after everything, to have him knock on your door right as you’re getting ready to have a night out. It still nearly takes your breath away to see him, looking as impeccable as usual in his dark gray suit, smiling as if his mere presence doesn't rock your world upside down a third time.
“What part of ‘don’t ever contact me again’ did you not understand?” you ask, though right away you can tell you don't sound nearly as firm and assertive as you’d like. You wonder if he can tell you hoped, against every rational thought in your brain, that he would come back.
Judging by his smile, you’d bet he can.
“I couldn't help myself,” he responds, raising his hands slightly in mock surrender. “Can I come in?”
That part of you that still clings to rationality, that can tell a good idea apart from a horrible one, lights up like a loud siren in your brain. There's nothing good that could possibly come out of this. Hasn't he toyed with you enough already? With his weird twisted games, tracking you down all the way to a foreign country, sending you off to those horrific games?
Still, you find yourself stepping aside, leaving a gap for him to come through. You’ve never been good at controlling your impulses, after all.
The apartment you’ve been renting for the time being stands in the heart of Paris. It looks exactly what you pictured a typical, glamorous Parisian apartment to look like – high walls, hardwood floors, large arched windows with a stunning view of the city and the Eiffel Tower. It's furnished with all the essentials, and nothing more. You didn't see the need to bring in new furniture or decorations when you didn't even know for how long you’d be staying in the city. At this point, you’re already considering moving on to somewhere else.
“Make yourself at home,” you say. “But I’m going out soon.”
“I see that.” His eyes run over you as he sits at the arm of the couch, shamelessly lingering on the black dress that hugs all your curves at the right spots. “Where are you going?”
“Out.”
You turn your back to him, looking for the earrings you had put down somewhere when you heard the knock on the door. You feel his body heat approach you from behind, his fingertips brushing against a red spot on your shoulder blade that the spaghetti straps of the dress fail to cover.
“Did I do this to you?”
His voice doesn't sound remorseful or apologetic at all. If only, there's a hint of pride to his tone, a small smile at the corner of his lip that you can tell is there without even looking at him. It should upset you, thinking of how roughly he pushed you against that wall, but it has goosebumps blooming all over your skin around the spot he touches.
“Who else would it be?” Your voice shakes ever so slightly against your will, and you clear your throat to get rid of it.
You expect him to pull back, but instead he inches even closer. He has to lean down to mold his chest to your back, his lips brushing the delicate skin of your neck when he speaks. “I can make it up to you.”
“Oh, really?” You turn your head just enough to chase after his lips. Screw the night out. He lets you capture them, indulging you in only a quick kiss before pulling away.
“I’m serious. I have something for you.”
“Oh.” You frown at the loss of contact, turning to face him. “What is it?”
“Close your eyes.”
Your frown deepens, and he raises his eyebrows at you. “Don't you trust me yet?” he asks.
No. Absolutely not. Still, what's the worst that can happen? What would he do while you have your eyes closed that he can't do right now; that he couldn't have done three nights ago at that bar, when you gave yourself to him so willingly?
You close your eyes, with a small sigh as if letting him know it's a nuisance. There's no real heat to it, and you both know it.
The Salesman’s hands find their way to your arms, guiding you further into the apartment. You follow his lead slowly, careful not to bump into any furniture or clutter you left around the place while picking an outfit and getting ready.
“You didn't have to give me a gift,” you say, still confused about what this is about. He stops walking the two of you, leaving you in an unknown part of the apartment. Your heart beats slightly faster than normal; distrustful, but excited. No man has ever bought you a gift before. Gifts are for girlfriends, for women they're trying to impress. Somehow, in all your years on this Earth, you’d missed out on being that woman to anyone.
“I was feeling romantic,” he explains. You feel something cold land over the exposed skin of your neck and chest, and he fiddles with a clasp at the nape of your neck. “Blame it on Paris. You can open your eyes.”
You do so, finding yourself standing in your bedroom, right in front of the large mirror resting against the wall. The necklace stands out against your skin – thin white gold chain and gemstones shining so bright you can immediately tell they're real, a ruby and a sapphire encrusted by tiny crystals. The color choice is an odd one for a necklace, prompting you to take a closer look. That's when any hints of a smile vanish from your face.
The gemstones are placed beside each other, the shapes and markings in them identical to those of the ddakji tiles you and the Salesman had played together in the subway station.
“I had it custom-made for you,” he says. Standing behind you, his reflection on the mirror takes up almost the entire background, but you don't pay him any mind. Your eyes are all but glued to the red and deep blue stones hanging from your neck, hoping against hope that you had seen it all wrong, that this was just a figment of your imagination and the real necklace will reveal itself if you just look hard enough.
It never does.
Reality hits you then. This isn’t some fun new fling, or the beginning of a Paris romance. This is the man who lured you into a horribly traumatic experience when you were at your most vulnerable, who came all the way from Seoul just to rub in your face that you didn't deserve to make it out of there alive. And now here he is. Prying his way into your apartment, your body, your mind. And you just let him.
Horror floods you, nearly pushing you to your knees right here. You touch the pendant with shaky fingers, and it takes everything in you not to grab the chain and yank it off your neck. Finally, your eyes meet the Salesman’s in the mirror.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?”
He blinks innocently. “You don't like it?”
“Why would you do this?” you ask, unsure of whether you want to burst into tears or slap him in the face.
His fingers join yours where they rest on the necklace, only grazing your skin on their way to touching the pendant. “I thought you'd like a reminder.”
That makes you spring into action, pulling away from him and pushing his hand away with a ferocity you didn't know you still had, not since the Squid Games.
“A reminder? What makes you think I want to remember that shit?” You raise your voice; something to make up for how small you feel, by the way you need to tilt your head to look him in the eye. “If I could erase that night from my memory for the rest of my life, I would.”
“I find that hard to believe. Would you erase our night together at the bar as well?” His eyes leave yours only to look back to the mirror behind you. “Look at you. Wearing those bruises so proudly.”
For a moment all you can do is stare at him, unable to believe the sheer audacity he has to stand in your house and say these things. The worst of it all is you can’t fully deny it – you picked the dress deliberately knowing it left the upper part of your back exposed, happy to catch glimpses of the bruises he left you with if you happened to stumble upon a mirror or reflective surface throughout the night.
“I would,” you insist. “What the fuck makes you think I’d want to remember the night that ruined my life?”
A laugh comes out of him; a short, but cruel sound. “I ruined your life, is that what you're saying?”
You scoff. “Don't act like you don't know you did.”
He steps even closer to you. You refuse to step back, even when it feels like his chest is about to bump into your forehead. “Your life,” he says, “was already shit way before I came around. Debt, an awful job, an even worse home, no future prospects, no friends. What exactly was there about your life that was good enough to be ruined?”
Rage consumes you to hear him talk like that about your old life. Things were bad, yes, but there was a positivity about you that's been lost ever since you stepped foot in those games. You could barely make ends meet, and your shifts were long and exhausting, but you had hopes of going to school, of turning your life around. Your home was a tiny, shitty house in an even shittier neighborhood, but you still took the effort to decorate it and try to make it feel more like a home. Where did that go? Now, you have all the money you could ever wish for, and all you do is spend it on clothes and expensive trips you don't even have the motivation to enjoy, your only goal being getting far away from Seoul.
“At least I felt like a fucking person! Do you even know what that’s like? Feeling human?” you all but yell, grateful for the language barrier in case any neighbors happen to be listening. “I’d never killed anyone. I’d never wanted to kill anyone! I didn't have nightmares, and I didn't wake up every day wondering if I deserve to be alive after everything I did to survive!”
“You had nothing,” he reminds you, his voice cold as the winter outside. “Not even your dignity. Or did you forget how we met? How you asked me to play ddakji with you, willing to get hit in the face repeatedly not for money, but just to have my attention?”
You hold back a sob, shaking your head furiously, but it's of no use. The words sting hard enough to bring tears to your eyes; it stings even more to know they're true.
“Get out of my apartment,” you demand. You wish you'd never let him in. You wish you'd never met him at all.
“Things are different now,” he says, ignoring your order completely. “You’re rich, and you’ve matured. You’ll never struggle again in your life, if you're smart.”
“I said GET THE FUCK OUT!”
Finally at your breaking point, you push him, shoving at his chest as hard as you have the strength to. He barely budges. It's only then that you notice how cornered he’s got you, your back about to bump into the mirror.
He brings his hand towards your face, cupping your chin and forcing you to look higher up at him. You thrash and claw at his wrist, trying to push it away from you, but he only tightens his grip until it's almost painful. There’s a darkness in his eyes that’s unlike any expression you’ve ever seen on him.
“I made you stronger. You're a millionaire now because of me,” he says. “How about a little gratitude?”
Even from your position, you still manage an incredulous scoff at him. “Gratitude?”
“Yes.” A grin stretches the corner of his lips, not a trace of warmth of friendliness behind it. “You should be thankful I pulled you out of your misery.”
He moves faster than you’re ready to, grabbing you by the waist and tossing you down. You brace yourself for the impact of your head hitting the floor, gasping in surprise when your back bounces over the soft mattress instead. He hovers above you, using his heavier body to pin yours down before you even have the chance to start struggling against his grip.
“Get off me!”
“Calm down.” He holds both your wrists together with one hand, while the other manages to somehow pull your panties off your body, using your kicking legs as leverage. Your eyes widen in shock. “I’m just giving you another reminder.”
“W-what?” Your voice wavers with fear. All that fury is slowly but surely being replaced with it, or with a mixture of both feelings that leaves you heaving for breath.
He doesn't have to pull your dress up – your own struggle does it by itself, leaving the fabric rumpled up at your hips and your bottom exposed. You stop kicking him in an attempt to cover yourself, and he takes advantage of that fraction of a second to stick his knee on the spot on the mattress between your legs, stopping you from shutting them. You gasp, the heavy pressure on your core cutting off all your thoughts for a moment. You can think of nothing to do other than to yell for help.
As if reading your thoughts, his free hand covers your mouth.
You voice your displeasure through a muffled grunt. You keep on struggling, trying to kick him off you, but each movement unintentionally rubs your bare clit over his thigh that pins you down. He applies even more pressure and you cry out, mortified to feel heat pooling between your legs.
“Christ, you're wet. I can feel it.”
You can feel it too, the fabric of his pants damp and hot where it connects with you. You're torn on whether to keep fighting and essentially humping his leg or giving up, if only to have a few instants of relief.
“If you scream, I’ll slit your throat,” he warns in a hoarse whisper. “Do you understand?”
Out of options, you nod.
He releases your mouth, then your wrists. It occurs to you to scream anyway, but you force yourself to remember who you're dealing with. He wouldn’t give you empty threats. Anyone involved in bringing people into those games has no qualms about slitting your throat open and leaving you to bleed out on your silk sheets.
The Salesman makes his way down your body, now holding onto your legs with his hands.
“What the fuck are you doing?” you manage to ask, the answer rather obvious but it had all happened so fast, leaving you dazed and confused.
“Giving you yet another reason to be thankful to me.”
The sudden, damp feel of his tongue on your entrance overcomes your senses, and you wouldn't be able to hold back a shout if you tried.
Fortunately, he forgives you for it. You squirm under the sensations, but he holds your hips down against the mattress in a firm grip, immobilizing them completely and prying you open all at once. You hoist yourself up over your elbows only to be met with your own reflection on the mirror across the room, your hair a mess already and your face contorted in fear and pleasure and indignation all at once. You can’t bear to watch yourself like this, mortification entrenched into every muscle of your body that reacts to his touch as he continues to penetrate you with his tongue. You fall back towards the mattress with a broken moan.
“God– Y-you can’t–” Whatever you were about to say dies out in your throat as his lips rise to your clit, enveloping you so expertly in the wet heat of his mouth. You clench your whole body, eyelids all the way down to your toes, and for a moment you’re grateful for the hands that hold your legs open just so you don’t have to face the shame of spreading them wider.
Your hands, perfectly capable of putting up a fight once they’d been released, twist into the sheets beneath you, holding on like your life depends on it. You curse yourself for not trying harder to push him off, for not really wanting to; for always being so unwilling to say no to him. Moans leave your lips like they’re being ripped out of you, growing in volume like you just can’t help it. It makes you wish one of the pillows were within reach so you could bury it against your face and muffle them, or simply to hide yourself from how incredibly good it feels to be at his mercy.
It doesn’t take long at all. Say whatever you want about the Salesman, but this is a man who knows what he’s doing with his tongue. In only a few minutes he reduces you to whimpers and pleading, your orgasm hitting you like a wave crashing full-force over the shore. Your back arches off the bed, mouth open in a long moan, and he continues to dine on you like a starving man until the moment you fall backwards, spent.
When you come back to yourself, you’re covering your face with your hands as he presses kisses to the line of your inner thigh. You feel him make his way up your body, feel his hands on your wrists, gently moving them out of the way and exposing your face, the deep flush that has colored your cheeks.
Looking into his eyes, you’re overcome with a rush of emotions you’re not sure how to name. How can a person make you feel so many things at once? How can you still want him – ardently, desperately, profoundly want him – after everything? How can he be so addictive, leaving you already hooked from the scraps of attention he’s given you? You tilt your head just a tiny bit towards him, a silent invitation, and he leans in the rest of the way to take your lips in his.
He kisses you deeply, hungrily, holding you through the shudders that run through your body from the aftershocks of your orgasm until they subside. Kisses you like you’re more than just a hookup, tempting you to believe there must be something about you that’s special. Kisses you for long enough to get you drunk in it, like he’s happy to do nothing but this for the rest of his life.
The next time he pulls back, he removes his suit jacket and tie. You somehow manage to help him unbutton his white shirt, motivated by the promise of feeling his bare skin on yours. You nearly forget his pants are still on, letting him work on that as you press kisses to down his neck. Of course his body is as perfect as his face. He makes an approving sound that you can feel on his throat, and you follow the vibrations of his vocal chords until his pulse point, pleased to find his heartbeats as fast as yours. You can’t resist taking the skin there between your teeth.
He growls, hands tightening on your hips and flipping you on the bed so you’re facing the other side, your back to him. You hold onto the bed frame to steady yourself, body half-bent forward.
You expect him to thrust into you without warning, just as he had the last time. Before that, he brings a hand underneath your chin, tilting your head upwards, your sight landing squarely on your joined reflection on the mirror.
“Keep your eyes right there.” Now he enters you, and you watch your eyes widen at the sudden intrusion. “Watch yourself get fucked on my cock.”
The sheer filth in his voice prompts you to obey, to look. Your knuckles turn white on the bedframe and your body rocks forward with each of his thrusts; slow at first, but steadily gaining power and speed. He reaches down to rub your clit in circles, and it makes your body jerk to feel it and see it at the same time, to watch your reactions in real time. The sight of the necklace still hanging from your neck prompts you to look away, a confirmation of what’s actually happening to you that you’re not prepared to stare in the face.
His hand leaves your clit to wrap itself into your hair, yanking it back. Your body arches to follow it, your reflection on the glass confronting you once again.
“I said look,” he says into your ear. “Don’t you wanna see what a pretty mess you are for me?”
You shake your head, although his death grip on your hair makes it difficult to move. That’s precisely the issue: seeing the mess that he made you into, seeing yourself so overwhelmed and dirty and ashamed, the sounds leaving you suggesting nothing other than aching, raw need. It’s too much. It doesn’t stop you from pushing your hips back to meet his, trying to match his rhythm.
He angles his thrusts to hit a spot inside of you that makes you see stars. “Oh God,” you croak, feeling the heaviness of tears behind your eyes and another orgasm fast approaching.
Just when you’re close, impossibly close to your release, he stops. You watch him on the mirror, panting just for a moment before he pulls out of you and releases your hair. You’re about to protest, or maybe plead for mercy, but he pushes you to lay on your back on the bed again, back inside of you before you can even think of a sentence.
“How about that thank you now?” He pounds into you, somehow even deeper from this position. “Say it.”
“Shut up,” you say instead. The pause, brief as it was, only served to make you more desperate to come, and the last thing you need right now is to hear this. “Please just shut up.”
The necklace gleams over your chest, catching his attention. The Salesman runs a thumb over the sapphire, as if contemplating something, before he presses down on the pendant hard, digging it into your skin.
You gasp, throwing your head back. He’s moving fast enough that the bed rocks underneath you, the headboard slamming into the wall, his fingers still on the necklace like he wants to imprint it into your chest. It fucking hurts, the sharp metal edges unrelenting, digging in hard enough to leave a bruise. It makes your body sing, awakes the deeply-hidden, fucked up parts of you that crave this kind of pain.
“Every time you wake up,” the Salesman says, slightly out of breath himself, but much more composed than you, “and you look out of the window and see Paris, or anywhere that’s not the gutter in Seoul, you thank me for saving you.” He punctuates his words with a particularly hard thrust. “Say it.”
You don’t want to say it. Saying it makes you feel like it’s true, like you should give in and believe what he’s saying. That you are a piece of trash who got lucky, after all, and you should thank him for anything close to success that you achieve from now on. But your orgasm is so close you can feel the force of it numb your ears, your wrists; and in this moment, you would say anything, do anything, so long as he keeps you feeling this good.
“Thank you,” the words are just barely above a whisper, like you wish you could keep them to yourself as a shameful secret.
“For what?”
He gives you another hard thrust, almost painful if only the lines between pain and pleasure hadn’t been blurred a long time ago. You push your chest into an arch, the pendant digging even deeper into you until it breaks skin and the pain turns into agony.
“F-for saving me.”
“Good girl.”
You come then, thinking about the mark that the necklace will leave on you, thinking about how you’re going to feel it for days, how you’re going to remember it every time you feel it or see it. That there will be evidence on your body that he touched you this passionately. It feels like you’re floating, rising to the sky as you clench and unclench around him, as sound after humiliating sound leaves you.
You collapse back against the mattress when your orgasm finally lets you go, boneless and spent. You didn’t see or hear him come – in another situation, it might’ve upset you to miss it, if you weren’t still riding the aftershocks of that incredible high –, but he’s still against you, breathing hard into your neck. His release leaks from between your legs. He stays like that for a long time, slowly softening inside of you, before he finally pulls out and away from you.
You stay right where you are, unmoving. Somewhere far away, you think you can hear him searching for his clothes and dressing himself. You don’t want it to upset you, but it does; because of course he would come here, humiliate you, give you the best fuck of your life and then immediately leave, without so much as a word to you. Your head falls to the side, and even that small movement feels incredibly difficult, like your entire body is a limb that has fallen asleep. Your vision is blurry, far-away, until it finally focuses on the large window that overlooks the city. Tiny snowflakes flutter over the city lights and the dark night sky.
“It’s snowing.”
That pulls his attention to you. He’s got his pants and shirt on, the first few buttons undone, his once perfectly-styled hair a mess. He follows the line of your gaze to the window. “Were you looking forward to it?” he asks.
“Yeah.” It feels like forever ago since the last time you even thought about it. The Salesman was right; the city is beautiful at this time of the year.
You expect him to return to his clothes then head out the door. Instead, he reaches for the covers over the bed and wraps your naked body up in them like a baby. “Ow,” you hiss when he moves you, pain exploding on your chest where the necklace was pressed against you. A few drops of blood dry on your skin from when the skin had split. You feel the Salesman lift you bridal-style, much to your surprise, but you’re still too dazed to find it in you to question it.
He sits you both on the thick windowsill, him behind you and you leaning against his chest, framed by his legs. It’s gentle, somehow more intimate than you’ve ever been with him even after sleeping with him twice. You watch the snowfall outside, mesmerized, letting the steady rise-and-fall of his chest behind you soothe your aching muscles.
It’s the closest to safe you’ve felt in what feels like forever, and you’re crying before you even realize it.
Once it starts, it’s impossible to stop it. Your body trembles with the force of your sobs, tears flowing from your eyes like they haven’t since you were a little kid, at least not this openly. He wraps his arms around you from behind, pulling you flush against himself and pressing a kiss to the top of your head.
“It’s okay,” he whispers, keeping his lips right there against your scalp. He rocks you ever so slightly, shushing your cries, the sound as soothing as a soft lullaby. “It’s okay.”
“It’s not,” you sob. You think about the snow in Seoul, about how the first snowfall always made you excited, even when it happened every year. You can feel your tears rolling down your cheeks and into your neck, your collarbones. “I want to go home.”
“Then go home,” he says, like it’s simple.
“I can’t.” How can you walk the same streets you always did, as if your life wasn’t completely changed? As if the price you paid for this change wasn’t much, much greater than you could deal with? “You’re right. I have nothing. No one.”
“You had nothing. You can have anything you want now.” You want to tell him there are things money can’t buy, but you’re so tired, so exhausted. You can’t muster the willpower for much other than wallowing in your own misery, weeping in his arms like a child. “And you have me.”
That only makes you cry harder, shaking your head. “Don’t say shit you don’t mean.”
“Look at me.” He nudges you to turn to him, the angle awkward but it’s so worth it the second he cups your face in both hands, brushing your tears away with his thumbs. “I mean it. Come back to Seoul.” He kisses the corner of your mouth, then your heavy eyelids. “You just need to see things from a different perspective. I can help you.”
He coaxes you to lay back against him, and you do so without protest, burying your face into his chest. For a moment you actually consider it. Dropping the plans you had for a next trip and following him to Seoul, letting him finish corrupting you with whatever twisted worldview he has. Maybe it would be blissful, you think, to see all that violence and bloodshed as a blessing, as something that saved you rather than ruined you. It has to be a trap, or another one of his games. But it doesn’t hurt to dream about it, just a little bit.
Little by little your crying subsides, your breaths returning to normal. He holds you through it all, stroking your hair in a way that’s so tender, so soft, like you’re fragile. Like he cares about you, or even loves you.
You silently wonder if he can love anyone at all, much less someone as broken as you.
With his fingers drawing circles on your scalp, you drift off into a dreamless sleep.
–––
You wake up alone. You’re still naked but on the bed, tucked into your blankets. There’s no confusion over what happened last night, no delusions that your brain would come up with a dream like that. There’s only memories hitting you like a truck, one after the other, and it’s too fucking early for this.
You pull yourself into a sitting position, and you jump at the sight of yourself on the mirror. You barely notice the smudged makeup from last night, your eyes going straight to the star of the show: the angry red spot right on the center of your chest, already turning into a deep purple at the center. You flinch before you even touch it, your hand hanging in the air halfway through like you’ve changed your mind. The necklace finishes it off like the cherry on top of the cake, the pair of precious stones right next to each other like eyes watching you, mocking you.
You button your coat all the way up before you leave the house.
It’s still early enough that the sun has just begun rising, coloring the sky in a bright blue that bleeds into the buildings and streets. There’s probably nothing open right now, but you could really use some coffee. Or a drink. Probably a drink.
You find him at Pont Neuf, watching the river below. There’s no one else around, the city in a rare moment of quiet and peace. He hasn’t spotted you yet, seemingly lost in thought, and it occurs to you that you could sneak up behind him, push him over the edge and just keep on walking. Sever your ties to him forever, and simply keep going like nothing ever happened, bury it along with all the other memories you try so hard to forget.
You don’t do it, but knowing you could brings you a bit of comfort. You lower your head and keep walking in the opposite direction, not sparing him another glance.
#the salesman x reader#salesman x reader#the recruiter x reader#gong yoo x reader#squid game x reader#the salesman x you#salesman smut#my fics#guess who was too lazy to make a cute banner#next time i promise
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Good Boy
Daryl Dixon x Reader one shot
Warnings/Tags: not proof read!!!, sfw, some swears, shane.
this is my first fic on this account, my first time attempting to write a fic in 4-ish years and my first time trying to write a twd fic. honestly it’s probably not great but I hope it’s at least somewhat decent. :-)
(also written and posted mobile so not sure how it will appear on browser, hopefully not too terrible!)
“Leave me the hell alone.” You harshly whispered, turning on your heels and storming away from the scene in front of you.
Your best friend reuniting with his wife and son. Alive. Not dead. This whole time he had you believing that Rick was dead and gone, never coming back. Yet your eyes were seeing a whole different story to the one Shane painted out for you a couple months prior.
Shane followed pursuit, ignoring the former comment you had made and put a firm hold on your wrist before pulling you behind Dales RV to conceal you from the others.
“Hey, hey . I swear to you Y/N, he was dead when I left that hospital room. He wasn’t breathing. Th- the monitors, they all stopped. Everything went dead. He was dead.” Shane iterated, time and time again.
You feel the anger bubbling up inside you, just like all those other times when Shane had told you Rick was dead and to get it through your head he isn’t coming back. Your hands curled into fists, your nails stabbing into your palm leaving crescent shaped indents.
“Except he wasn’t. Is this why you didn’t want me to go there? Didn’t want Lori to go there? Because you knew if you swooped in and saved her and Carl when Rick couldn’t that what- she’d become your damsel in distress? Is this why? Just so you could get your leg over and fuck your partners wife and become Carls daddy? You’re pathetic Shane.” At this point your head was swarming with thoughts and ideas of what you wanted to do to Shane but better judgement got the best of you.
You began to walk off when a hand reached for you again, this time rougher. Shane pushed you against the RV, his brows furrowed and sweat dripping off his temples- smoke nearly coming out of his ears at this point.
“I don’t know what you think you know but you’re wrong either way. I think you’re forgetting that I didn’t just save Lori and Carl, I saved your sorry ass too. I didn’t have to. That was on me Y/N, That was on me. An’ I ain’t ever looked at Lori like that before, she was Ricks wife and he was my best friend. It happened because I thought he was dead.” He all but growled at you in a hushed whisper.
You remained quiet and stoic for a few moments, registering your thoughts before smirking slightly and speaking again. Pushing Shane’s hand off of you, you began to walk away but not before turning and giving one last snide remark, “I think I know right. And, by the way.. really interesting use of the past tense in those last few sentences there.”
Dickhead.
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“I’ve been here for quite a few hours now and yet, still no hello?” You looked beside you to see Rick crouched with a smile on his face, placing an arm around your shoulder which you leaned into graciously.
“Sorry Grimes.. just- a lot to take in y’no.” You said.
“Na’ I get it. Shane told me what happened.” Rick remarked whilst kissing his teeth and shaking his head.
“He did? Really? What did he say?.”
To say you were shocked was an understatement, Shane had really gone out of his way to-
“Yeah.” He breathed out, “Told me how it started, he tried to get me from the hospital but I wasn’t breathing and he thought I was dead. How he saved you and Lori n’ Carl and got you all here.”
“He told you that huh.” You should have known.
Rick started to stand back up, giving you a pat on the back and a kiss to the forehead first “I’m gonna go get some shut eye, you need too aswell. Talk more in the morning Y/N.” Rick turned to walk back towards camp, not before turning and speaking again, “Y/N.. go nice on Shane though ok? He’s a good guy, you just gotta give him a chance.”
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You wake up the next day to the sound of what you thought was - for once - peace and quiet. Until you hear the shouts outside and a woman screaming stop.
Debating between laying back down and just going back to sleep or getting up and out of your tent to see what was going on, you went with the better judgement and begrudgingly dragged yourself to get changed and step outside.
Shielding your eyes from the rays of light beaming off the Atlanta sun with a sigh escaping your lips at the slight breeze that hit your clammy skin.
“You’d best let me go!”- what the fuck was happening this time?
Walking closer you take sight of Shane with his arms wrapped around Daryl’s neck. A fuckin’ cop getting someone in a choke hold the minute they raise their voice? New worlds maybe not as different from before.
“I’d like to have a calm discussion on this topic, you think we can manage that?” Rick spoke calmly whilst he crouched in front of Daryl, his chest heaving with rocky breaths as Shane’s tight grip didn’t let up just yet.
“You think we can manage that?” Rick repeated.
You zoned out at this point, eyes boring into the side of Shane’s skull with anger.
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“I’m coming.” You didn’t hesitate to jump at the opportunity to get away from camp for a while. The rising tension taking over was beginning to grate at you.
“That’s five”
Shane piped up “It’s not just five, you’re putting every single one of us at risk.” “Just know that Rick”
“Come on man you saw that walker. It was here.
It was in camp.
They’re moving out of the cities.
They come back, we need every able body we’ve got.
We need em here, we need em to protect camp.”
Staying focused when Shane’s voice is droning on for what seems like eternity is quite the mission lately. Listening to him is beginning to seem like nails on a chalkboard.
“-Shane is right. Merle Dixon? He’s not worth one of your lives, even with guns thrown in.”
Hearing Loris voice made you gain attention again.
“If someone left Rick behind-“ you began to join the conversation, maybe with the words aimed at Shane slightly. He clearly picked up on it as his eyes shot to you, if looks could only kill, you’d be six feet under.
“Would you want them to go back for him? Or would you let him stay handcuffed to a roof to die slowly?” Your eyes landing on Lori.
“That’s different. Rick.. he.. he isn’t like Merle. He wouldn’t get himself into that position in the first place.” The stern mom tone coming out as Lori tried to keep her composure and not snap in front of Carl.
“You think Merle purposely got himself into that position? He’s an asshole yeah, and he may have deserved it. But he didn’t expect to be handcuffed and then left behind. Not knowing if anyone was going to go back for him. It may have been an accident. But he shouldn’t have to sit there wondering if he’s just going to die from thirst and hunger or if he’s going to get torn to pieces at the hands of walkers. He may not be your family, but he’s someone’s family. You have your husband, your son. You have Shane. Merle is all Daryl has.” You’re not sure if you were even breathing during that, your chest rising up and down at a rapid speed. You felt rage. How could anyone justify this bullshit?
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Sitting in the back of the van was a bit more awkward than you anticipated. Glenn and Rick up front. You, Daryl and T-dog in the back. Maybe the tension in the back of this van was worse than the tension at camp?
You looked up smiling at T-dog as he avoided Daryl’s intense stare, before he got up and headed to the front to talk to Glenn and Rick.
Daryl kept shooting you glances whenever he thought you couldn’t see, a grunt leaving his mouth every so often as if he was about to talk but decided against it.
Just as you looked up at him, he was already staring with his open yet no words seemed to come so he just scoffed and averted his eyes anywhere but at you.
You began to grow a bit frustrated at him. “What?”
“Nothin’” he all but murmured.
“Stop grunting and scoffing at me like a dog who didn’t get enough treats, be a good boy and just say whatever it is you’ve been wanting to say for the last 15 minutes.” You couldn’t help but chuckle at yourself.
You could have sworn you saw a light tinge of pink cross his cheeks before his head dropped down facing his lap.
His mouth opened and closed, before opening once again “Why’d ya stick up for me.. for Merle back at tha’ camp?”
Oh. That’s what this was about? The intense looks he gave you before this made you think it was about anything but this.
“What do you mean?” You had to admit you were somewhat confused at this.
“Ya said it y’self, Merle, he’s an asshole. So why’d ya go out of ya way to defend him? Why didn’t ya just side with the others and leave him?” Head dropping once again as his thumb found its way to his lips as he gnawed on the nail.
Silence.
You were stuck for words. “He is an asshole. Maybe one of the biggest assholes I’ve ever known. But he’s your brother, maybe not the greatest one but still your brother no matter what. He’s all you have left. The others may not understand, but I do.” Taking a deep breath in and thinking about your next words carefully, “I honestly couldn’t give a shit about him. Doesn’t mean I want him to suffer up there on that roof. No one deserves it. Well I mean maybe some people y’no? Really bad people. And maybe Shane. Merle, he’s not necessarily one of those really bad people. He makes mistakes, says things he definitely shouldn’t and has actions that match, but don’t we all in one way or another?”
Daryl was slightly overwhelmed. Not expecting you to be so honest and caring? Somewhat caring anyway. He didn’t know what to say.
You hummed and tapped your fingers against your legs, “Nothing to say?”
“I dunno what you want me to say.”
A grin made its way to your face.
“How about a thanks?”
“Thanks.” He grumbled trying not to scoff afterwards to avoid being called a dog again.
The van began to come to a stop, Glenn saying something about walking from here.
You stood up whilst stretching your arms above your head.
“That’ll do. Good boy.”
You smirked at him before opening the back of the van and climbing out. Leaving a blushing Daryl in the back trying to hide his face as he groaned standing up.
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authors note: it’s not the greatest, I am very aware. but I really wanna get back into writing in general and I thought starting with twd would be the best place to start as it’s one of my comfort shows. there’s not much happening, it’s very heavily based on s1 e3 obviously but it’s mostly just to try and get back in the swing of things! if you have an constructive feedback or any comments you’d like to make, please feel free as it will be much appreciated :-) I’m hoping to improve my writing skills more and more. It will probably take a while (I’ve literally had the first half of this thing in my notes app since June 2024) but I hope to get to the point of making some good fics! thank you for reading if you managed to make it this far!:)
#the walking dead#daryl dixon#daryl dixion imagine#daryl dixon x reader#daryl dixon fanfiction#the walking dead daryl#twd daryl#twd x reader#daryl dixon oneshot#daryl dixon imagine#twd fanfiction
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I recently read a fic that unlocked a previously undiscovered interest of mine, and i cant seem to find any other fics like it, so you guys get to watch me spiral (again)
This came from the Talia al-Ghul is Jason Todd's adopted mom pipeline, and the fic was a very short blurb where someone offered Jason the Joker's death as a courting gift, as according to the League of Assassin's tradition had to ask for Ra's blessing as the head of his family, and Damian tranqued Batman to let this happen, because 'this has nothing to do with you, Father, this is al-Ghul family business' and aaaaaa
Just, the League having its own culture, traditions.
I know its Ra's assassins club, but he is old as fuck. There have probably been families that are part of the League for generations. This amounts to not inly courting traditions, but customs, manners, holidays, all with a different twist that came with time in this isolated society, and i just want to see more fics that explore this.
Damian being cut out of his culture completely, no idea why no one responds the way he expects, not because of trauma and 'why is no one punishing or praising me', but genuine 'i told Drake i could demonstrate my skills with a blade for him, and why didnt he offer to show me how he fights with his staff??? He didnt even say he already knew how to use blades, is he implying that i am not sufficiently trained to be capable of teaching him? Does he think i am not worthy of being in this family, and thats why he refuses to train with me??'
(Meanwhile Tim firmly believes he just got threatened to be shish-kebabed by a 10 yo and is shook. Of course, Damian just wanted to spend quality time with his new family member the way he knows how to, but tim doesnt know that, and Damian doesn't know thats how tim understood it either)
And Jason being a part of the al-Ghul household, too, is very interesting. I love the concept of Talia sending him on his way to Gotham as Red Hood partialy to make the city safer for when Damian went over, Hood putting the fear of god into criminals so that the Demon Prince could walk through the city of his father with less fear and apprehension. Jason and Damian celebrating League holidays and traditions together (of course, jason only does it so the little guy can have this confor of home and family, he did promise T that he would take care of him, its not like he enjoys quality time with a family member he never tried to kill, or that he misses the conforts of the league and dinners with the al-Ghuls, of couse not).
Anyways, thank you for listening to my ted talk
#dc comics#jason todd#damian wayne#talia al ghul#ra's al ghul#league of assassins#i also saw a post where someone said that ra's is not that stereotypically evil all the time#so i think it'd be fun for him to be a decent grandpa in this#talia: father i request permission to heal my beloved's son who rose from the dead on his own#ra's: ..... sure#*six months later*#ra's: daughter please dont take this the wrong way but the boy is not getting better just give him a mercy kill already#talia after catching jason tucking damian in at night: i am adopting him and you cant stop me#ra's:...... okay?#talia: he will need an al-ghul naming ceremony and a bath in the pit#ra's: alri- wait what i did not agree to this talia come back here#jason: slaughters everyone in his path during his pit rage only calms down when talia talks to him#ra's: okay... your boy might be a good enough warrior to honor the al-ghul name. maybe.#talia: *smug noises*#batman#red hood
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hi! i'll keep this short
i came to the realization everytime i've disappeared from tumblr to "take a break" i never really have because of other things going on in my life (which, duh, this isn't my whole life) but! i also realized that if i never actually take the time to recover and rest and think about things i should be writing i'll never feel better. so! i'm (once again)(but now more formally) going on hiatus until maybe may! i might pop in for spring break or earlier if i feel like it, but until then, not really any writing from me! with that being said, i'll still be around, doting on my moots (i.e. like, dorothea <3 wyr <3 and bug <3) because i love them so much and i will probably also post chapters of present ever so often! the reason being (i'm going to try to make this make sense but it may only make sense to me but i'm aware of how contradicting i am to me five seconds ago when i said i need to take a break from writing) present is a very personal fic for me that i've worked on for years at this point. what i'm posting now are chapters i wrote months ago after I've read over and edited them (or in the case of the upcoming chapter, i did randomly add it in and had to write it from the ground up last week lmao) but if it isn't obvious, present is a work i'm very passionate about and am just posting in case anyone else enjoys it but it feels like it's a work that is very individualized just for me and it doesn't cause me any stress or anxiety. on the topic of individualization, although i am of course so so thankful for all of the support and people that follow me, i do sort of miss when my blog and world were a lot smaller. it's something i feel like i only get when i get to reply to people in comments, but other than that, all the numbers and people on my feed give me a lot of anxiety. the hq (smau fandom especially) fandom or at least how much i'm (was) involved in it has grown exponentially and of course i'm happy about that but it's a bit too much for me. i'll be taking a huge step back from the fandom and any hq works i've written at least in the meantime, but that's not to say they'll never be finished! but i either need to grow to handle the bigger audience that now reads my works or wait for things to grow a little smaller again :) i hope to still be able to read my moots works but forgive me if it takes me a bit or i never get to them! i think at the least i'll still like them to show my support <3 thank you if you read my long ramble! i love you all <3
oh also i'll probably post self ship moodboards and the beginning of my reading list (thank you again dorothea for the idea <3)! but again, I think you get the idea by now; I want to go back to doing this for me! so this is a tiny little goodbye now i'm leaving for you all with forehead kisses and flowers and love notes and mwah <3 i'll see you around!
#that was not kept short#tldr; i'm taking a long break from writing (probably around may or so) and will not be super involved in the hq fandom anymore#i'm planning to try to go back to my roots! where i often really only ever posted when i uploaded fics and then i'd disappear again#idk what i'm doing!#or maybe i just need to wait long enough for people to sort of forget about me 😭 (IN A NOT SEEKING ATTENTION WAY SORRY)#but i just need to like! just do stuff for myself again!#last january or so i believe is when i started posting and i'd just really nervously hit the publish button#and then never look at tumblr again bc i was so scared#and i didn't have to worry about notifs from anyone and it was a very small and personal blog where no one knew me and I didn't know anyone#and while i sort of miss that i'm also not trying to say i'm not greatful for the friends i have made! i am very thankful for them#so that's instead why i'm settling for a middle between what my blog used to be and what I feel like it is now!#even just posting that dazai fic a little bit ago made me realize how much i missed just showing up out of the blue posting something#in a fandom that has literally basically never heard of me#and leaving again 😭#i'm happy to give out my socials if anyone wants them :3#okay bye bye!
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Aizawa Shouta & Shinsou Hitoshi Father-Son Dynamic Big Recomendation Fic List for starters and not
Hi everyone! After quite a long time, I finally post my Recommendation Fic List (the crowning glory of my stay in the MHA fandom) of Aizawa and Shinsou Father-Son Dynamic.
I always start reading fanfiction before I even finished read the original, what does that says about me?
I became familiar with a fairly common theory that Shinsou Hitoshi is an orphan with a rather dread past, which, of course, activated a huge curiosity in me. I tried to analyze the trend, and I will say that it's quite clear: People were infected with the idea, where abused Hitoshi was somehow saved by Aizawa. And so was I. I've read for almost hundread of any combinations of this trend and NOW I finally ready to present my Fic List.
Attention. I will attach UNFINISHED fanfics, but which actively (or not so) updated, because they are masterpieces.
WARNING! I do not attach stories which contain:
ships (except Erasermic and 2-3 ShinKami but they are not MAIN)
alpha/beta/omega thing
too fluffy and too family-oriented fics (there will be ones, but I don't want to make them a centre of my list
I cut Rec List on different genre sections (read: dynamics) and add fanfics from the most angst ones to fluffy ones so you can easily pick what you like most ;)
So, let's start!
fandomofhappiness's personal top
You Want It Darker by Ms_Chunks Genres: Shinsou Has Family, Gore and Murder, Detective, Mentor and Parental Aizawa Status: FINISHED (533,808 words) foh's comment: Highly interesting! Shinsou here is not represented as perfect kid or downtrodden teenager, he is the way I liked him in anime and manga: he bites, hisses, snaps, makes sarcastic jokes and does not allow anyone hurt him. Aizawa and Shinsou very slowly gain trust from each other, but that makes their relationship seem sincere, and not caricatured. Read for the detective, the non-orthodox view of the Hitoshi family and Erasermic. READ THE TAGS and be aware!
Fundamental Theorem of Heroics by NightowlRobin Genres: Foster Kid Shinsou, Vigilante Shinsou, Heavy Angst, Parental Aizawa Status: UNFINISHED but updates weekly (more 700k words) foh's comment: Truly FUNDAMENTAL work of all Shinsou Hitoshi stories on ao3. I'd so like to confess my true respect and love to the NightowlRobin for their most mind-blowing plot and detailising. (You will probably meet Aizawa only after 10 chapters. And it will take even longer until Hitoshi and him properly meet.) This is an epochal work that will make you believe in Hitoshi's true character and make you cry of his story because it's really brutal. I think this is the favourite work of everyone who liked Shinsou with all their hearts.
To Turn A Man Into A Stone by tanli Genres: Foster Kid Shinsou, Angst, Mentor Aizawa Status: FINISHED (15,128 words) foh's: comment: Even months after I read this work, I look back on it and think: the author did an 11/10 job. Just so you understand: this is the best example of how I see the relationship between Aizawa and Shinsou. It is the apotheosis of sincerity and affection. It is a test of will, deep introspection and acceptance. It performed so well that it seemed to me that the author wrote a chapter for the manga. Damn, the author did a lot better than the mangaka. If the previous two works were not so high-quality and grandiose, I would've put this one at the very top of my list.
If Lies Had A Flavor by scooter3scooter Genres: Foster Kid Shinsou, Erasermic Adopt Shinsou, Heavy Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Eating Disorders Status: FINISHED (10,003 words) foh's comment: Perhaps one of the many angst works written by scooter3scooter, which I have reread more than once or even twice. This work is special to me, because I have never seen such an interesting look at the consequences of Shinsou's stay in an orphanage. Complex and emotional work. It is truly an honour to get acquainted with such a vast problem of humanity as eating disorder through this fanfic.
crybaby by Brachydios Genres: Foster Kid Shinsou, Erasermic Help Shinsou, Heavy Angst & Eventual Comfort, Canon Divergence Status: FINISHED (51,219 words) foh's comment: I've read this work more times than I can remember. Brachydios came into my life with this incredible work and tore me apart from the inside. I believe in every detail they describe, every character move is justified. I want to sympathize with Shinsou over and over again. One of the best Quirk-Shenanigans trope that has brought 1017 people to tears - be the next one. The performance is 100 of 10.
How It Goes by Ibelieveinahappilyeverafter Genres: Foster Kid Shinsou, Erasermic Adopt Shinsou, Heavy Angst & Eventual Comfort Status: FINISHED (20,021 words) foh's comment: This is one of the best written Foster Kid Shinsou stories ever. Hitoshi's adaptation, his thoughts and feelings, his panic, his fear of going back to the orphanage are described in a deep sincere way here. It's a heartbreaking story about the fear of punishment, taking consenquences and family. It was very personal for me and I hope you get a lot emotions after reading it.
Faith by slightlycrunchy Genres: Mentor and Parental Aizawa, Anxious Shinsou, Hurt/Comfort, School Situation Status: FINISHED (2,651 words) foh's comment: This work is also quite personal choice of mine. I wouldn't say it's grandiose, but it's very emotional for me. For the kid who worries about grades all their life, who is afraid to make a mistake, who is afraid to lose everything because of one mistake and who doesn't know how to accept their failures. I ask you to read this if my words resonate in your soul. This is the truth that we all need to hear.
Absolute Tops
Point Blank by Cobbiest foh's rec: an interesting, intriguing and beautifully written Shinsou's journey to become a part of Erasermic Family (and hero)
Deathworlders to the extreme! by AquaStarDark foh's rec: that's the funniest, most captivating and rocking people-are-space-orcs thing that I've read, really worths reading
I Would Understand by deafmic foh's rec: that is the first things first to read if you're new here, but tnh I wasn't ready for this work and dropped it once or twice before I finally made it and read it, it's really really good, but I wouldn't recommended as first-to-read.
Back to the Nest by Mags_Pie foh's rec: such a sweet thing about children and their parents. I was smiling so much.
Everything is different (since you've been around) by Plasmapause foh's rec: and THIS is how I see the best written relationship between Shinsou & Aizawa AND Shinsou & Yamada, they're building trust and becoming family very slowly BUT you really believe in these life situations that happen to Hitoshi, it is very sincere and touchy work.
It's not always easy. by ethgri foh's rec: and THIS is the HEAVIEST work I've read and really recommend it. The emotions are real and naked, I practically felt the same pain. Please be ready for heart journey, this is a brutal masterpiece.
Herding Cats by Robbirdthe8th (FictionalFeather) foh's rec: the COOLEST detective wotk, have nothing to say - just read it.
Margay by Oceanbreeze7 foh's rec: one of best ever written Shinsou.
QueNouilleCroustillante (the author of AUs that you won't forget: you may know theirs Bright Stars, but I beg you to read all of their works)
deafmic (you guys do know deafmic, that's deafmic's section for Aizawa and Shinsou, it's all too fucking good)
Mentorship Dynamics
More than a cry by Assassin Bug
Stubborn choices by Madaver
Not In The Job Description by ididntneedanewfandom (prettyvk)
Voices by SquirrelWriter
mind break by baggytshirtsandtiredeyes
The Lilac Garden by Mars_is_Gone
the night was a gelid, bitter, and biting thing by sonrissa
Countdown by Mags_Pie
polished doubt, fake sentiment by s_beth
Consequences by 22FluffyTheSpider123
Legacy by the_crownless_queen
Aizawa's Warmth by LoveableMink
Hitoshi Shinsou's Not-So-Smart Training Method by maarvehl
Keep Him Safe by Mags_Pie
stealing is bad? by borlios
Learning Curve by Cyborg_Franky
Play Along by eillo
from one foot to the other by ohwickedsoul
Family Dynamics
So this section I prefer to divide in two subsections:
fanfics where Shinsou is heavely traumatised and learns how to handle it with Eraser(-mic) help (Section A)
fanfics where Shinsou traumatises world around him and still learns how to handle it (Section B)
P.S.: section B comes first, because I love how authors perform Shinsou. They captured his audacity, intelligence and rebelliousness, he's learning from his traumas but does it shitty, and that is really interesting.
Family Dynamics Section B:
When the Darkness Fades by BlueCats
Growing Up (is harder than it looks) by BlueCats
Concerning (Some-)Things by Tododorkey (ApolloBlackwood)
The Beginning of Always by meow_z_z_z
First Day of School by Jyxnie
Split Lip; Silver Tongue by CreamcheeseBagel
Unforgettable by deafmic
A Lesson in Vengeance by Smurfee
somewhere in my heart of hearts (i knew it all along) by bototyelenol
Call to Eraserhead by sukeruton
surviving on elevated cortisol and spilt coffee by Crykea
How to Win the Sports Festival: A Step by Step Guide by mhwright
Hitoshi Shinsou's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Days by Princeliest
Tight-Lipped Belief by Robbirdthe8th (FictionalFeather)
House of the Rising Sun by caprisunontherocks
Family Dynamics Section A:
Just A Phone Call Away by odymcbea
Twist My Words by CreamcheeseBagel
Take Care (of me) by scooter3scooter
it’s in the way he- by scooter3scooter
masterpiece of nature by Brachydios
spare the rod by Brachydios
Not Today (Tomorrow it May Change) by deafmic
You're an Alien? by Badum_tsh
Pardon My Presence by ShiDreamin
Everything Will Be A-Okay by nikouji
Lucky Cat by deafmic
The Misadventures of the Yamazawa Family by ComplicatedSquishy101
Home Alone by fecklessphilanderer
a voice your body jumps to callin' out your name by sparrowsAce, wander_wren
Last (First) Adventure by deafmic
You've Got A Heart As Loud As Lions by Robbirdthe8th (FictionalFeather) (warning! this work contains sexual abuse. I felt it was a difficult decision to include this here, as it is an incredibly complex topic and also incredibly important. This work is written with such respect and love, with such sensitivity, I cannot even begin to express it in words. Please, if this topic is disturbing and triggering to you, please be careful to read it.)
This concludes my top list. I finished reading about two months ago and plan to return soon and see what new and good is being written along this Father-Son trope. If you have any other cool works that are not presented here and you want to share them, send them into comments. I would be very glad! Thank you for attention!
#bnha#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#mha#present mic#yamada hizashi#aizawa shouta#eraserhead#erasermic#hizashi yamada#shinsou hitoshi#hitoshi shinso#shinso hitoshi#bnha shinsou#hitoshi shinsou#mha shinsou#ao3 shinsou#erasermic family#dadzawa
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For the fic ask game.. something about Joe and Ja’Marr meeting for the first time after Ja’Marr got drafted/landed in Cincy?
i was actually thinking about writing this! you read my mind 🙂↕️
so in joe’s pov, it starts off calmly. he definitely contributed to drafting ja’marr, and he’s proud of that. he makes a point to do something with ja’marr, like treating him to dinner, planning this whole thing out, getting excited to see his best friend again, in person rather than through a phone. and the moment joe actually sees ja’marr again, he freezes up. because maybe they haven’t really talked in a bit, and joe feels this sense of… panic? fear? as he comes to the conclusion that something is different. some kind of feeling just under his skin that he used to feel back at LSU, only when he was around ja’marr.
still, joe has the biggest smile on his face when he pulls ja’marr in for a hug. he takes him out to dinner and it’s like they were never separated, like no time has passed at all. and if they have a little to drink and joe thinks about kissing ja’marr, who would ever know?
as for ja’marr’s pov, he’s probably nervous, but wouldn’t let it show. there’s a biiiiiig difference in college football and the nfl, and he has yet to experience that himself, and on top of that he’s gotta move to an entirely new city. but he finds comfort in knowing he’s going to play with joe again, knowing he’s going to have a familiar presence around him, so he’s not actually too nervous. in this regard, i feel it’s more fitting to say ja’marr would already be aware that he has even the tiniest bit of an attraction towards joe, although he might’ve misinterpreted it as fondness for his amazingly talented quarterback. he has the entire plane ride to consider what he wants to say to joe, putting a lot of pressure on it. what if the year ja’marr took off affected the way he plays in training camp, and joe begins to hate playing with him? what if joe doesn’t get to play the same way because of his knee injury?
but when he sees joe again, it’s like his brain shuts off. everything he just thought about on the plane leaves his mind, because he gets greeted with joe’s vibrant eyes meeting his own, and it solidifies the fact that he has a lot to suddenly figure out. ja’marr having a crush would be a massive understatement.
HOWEVER, i would also like to add an alternate idea where it’s an established relationship, and they were long distance ever since joe was drafted. both of them agreed to that because they somehow had confidence that they’d be able to play together again, despite all of the fear that it would never be possible. when joe is given the perfect opportunity to get the bengals to draft ja’marr, he doesn’t waste it.
naturally, it makes their reunion all the more emotional. joe kind of makes it embarrassing, showing up to the airport with a cheesy little sign when he picks ja’marr up. they don’t make any real public displays, but there’s a pretty quick kiss between them before they head to joe’s.
and there’s a moment when joe excitedly says “you’re here!” like he can’t believe they made it work, and ja’marr feels a little overwhelmed, but joe’s kiss grounds him. when they’re finally alone, ja’marr dramatically says he wants something to eat, and joe wastes no time cooking something. he’d rather skip the food entirely, he really wants to take ja’marr upstairs, but he settles for a few messy kisses while he stands in front of the stove.
i think it would end up being a combination of hesitancy and eagerness when it comes to everything after that. joe hoisting ja’marr up like he weighs nothing, carrying him to bed, being as gentle as possible, feeling like he needs to be careful because they haven’t been together in over a year and he can’t help but feel a little nervous. ja’marr reassures joe that he’s still very much in love with him and doesn’t care what they end up doing. they inevitably go for a few rounds despite constantly interrupting each other by how much they keep choosing to cuddle instead. the night ends with one or both of them watching the other, like they’ve got cartoon hearts swirling around their heads, just soaking in the moment. finally reunited, staying together like this, getting to spend every day together once again. there’s an unspoken sort of rule established between them that day, where they’ll do whatever it takes to stay together, both with their relationship on and off the field.
#i would love to write a fic that’s both in joe’s and ja’marr’s pov#what i wrote out here would be a good fic to do it with#would require a bit of research into the lsu days…#but yea! i hope this was good#i have a bit of a headache so i don’t know if i’m being coherent enough#joemarr#asks
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“Do you want me to wear a wig?”
A/N: Remember when I said '5 line fanfics'? Yeah.
(Please be kind lol, this is my first fic in a whiiiile).
“Do you want me to wear a wig?”
“No, I don’t want you to wear a wig.”
“What about heels?”
“You don’t wear heels.”
“But Karen does!”
Matt sighed and put a hand to his forehead. “Y/N, you’re not Karen,” he said, his voice sounding exactly how he felt: exhausted. This had been the first evening in longer than he could remember that he wasn’t catapulting himself across Hell’s Kitchen, and yet somehow, his aches and bruises were more prominent now than they had been when he was. He’d taken the day off—not that there was a workplace to take it from—and spent it in his pyjamas, trying not to aggravate his battered body more.
And so, it had not been his idea to stand in his living room at 2 am, feeling like the world had swallowed him and spat him right back out again. Neither had it been his idea to submit to a drama performance orchestrated by his sister. And yet, here he was.
This drama performance was entitled: Practicing Telling Karen That I’m Daredevil. In reality, Matt hadn’t given that much thought past the fact that it needed to happen. It was time. He had told Foggy, and he refused to leave Karen out any longer. But his ideas didn’t quite reach how, or when, or where. He’d figured that in any way, anytime, and anywhere, the result would be the same. There would be disbelief, and there would be accusatory remarks of betrayal and lying, and then quite possibly he would be on the receiving end of a slap. But he was okay with that, because at least it would be done.
You, ever the protector, had not been okay with that. You have to be prepared, you'd told him, nothing ever goes right for us. If you don’t figure this stuff out then she’ll probably find out you’re Daredevil when you’re sitting on the toil—
Well, he didn’t want that. So, he’d agreed. Partly because you weren't exactly wrong… mostly because he knew his sister, and he knew that every hour spent awake with him was one more you could hold onto. This was more for your benefit than it was Karen's.
“For all intents and purposes, yes,” you said, “yes, I am. I am Karen. Come on, into position.”
There was never any winning with you. Let it not be known that Matthew Murdock, fierce attorney at law, alias Daredevil, crime-fighting vigilante, could beat and punch and kick his way out of any situation except ones you had pulled him into.
Practically hearing the call of his bed, Matt picked up the bag with his mask inside. You had suggested he swing in through the window of Murdock and Nelson dressed in the suit.
Never gonna happen.
He turned his face towards you, stood across from him in your dressing gown, wet hair tied back. With a resigned sigh, he took the mask from the bag, and, the words feeling stupid on his lips, as though he was in some sort of cheesy superhero movie: “I’m Daredevil.”
There was silence. A sniff. You narrowed your eyes. Then, you snorted a laugh.
“Ha, ha. That’s hilarious.”
Matt tilted his head. “Is it?”
“Dude—no, wait, Karen wouldn’t say dude—Matt, you’re an awesome lawyer, seriously, but—you?" Incredulity dripped from your tone. "Scaling buildings and backflipping from roof to roof? That’s like… imagining Foggy in a bikini.”
“I’m trying really hard not to be insulted right now.”
“Did you forget you’re blind?”
Matt frowned, his muscles tensing a little. “I am blind. But I’m also Daredevil.”
You rolled your eyes, and Matt couldn’t help but think he should have enrolled you in acting school when you were younger.
“And did I tell you I’m Jesus Christ incarnated?”
Momentarily forgetting the feeling of his silk sheets and a cold pillow beneath his aching head, Matt drew his brows together and his jaw fell slightly open. “Are you making fun of me?”
“If you’re Daredevil, why don’t you prove it?”
“I’m not doing a backflip in the living room.”
You scrunched your nose up. “You’re so boring.”
“Okay. Then where do you think I got his mask from?”
You took a moment, eyes narrowing in suspicion, tongue running across your teeth as you thought. You walked towards him and took the mask from his hands. Matt listened while you moved it about, turning it upside down, hands passing over the horns as you scrutinised every detail.
You stood on your tiptoes to peer at something. Matt was patient. When you were satisfied, you made a disgruntled nose and threw the mask onto the couch. Arms crossed once again you stared determinedly up at him, saying simply: “Stolen."
Your brother rose a brow and mirrored your position, clear he was no longer dealing with Karen Page. “Alright,” he said, “I’ll bite. Why do you reckon that?”
“Too small to fit on your fat head.”
There were about two seconds between Matt tossing his head back and laughing, and grabbing you to toss onto the couch. Quicker than you had time to register it, he was over you, one knee beside you, his hands shooting down to tickle you.
You positively screamed, your brother’s full and legal name exiting your mouth in one shrill shriek.
“You’re a little shit, you know that?” Matt expertly dodged the kick aimed at his chest, wincing as his body reminded him of the stunts he’d pulled over the last few nights. He flopped in the seat beside you, his mask falling to the floor, and grabbed your hand as it aimed for his nose, holding it far enough away from the both of you that you couldn’t touch him.
“Noho! Stop!”
“No, you don’t know that? Damn, I’ve been slacking in my duties as big brother, haven't I?"
“You would—” You squeezed your eyes shut, one foot planted firmly against Matt's thigh, your free hand desperately trying to shove his away—“YOU WOULDN’T DOHO THIS TO KAHAREN!”
Matt scoffed a laugh, then, with an evil chuckle, leaned over you, hands still at work—“Karen knows how not to get on my last nerve,” he growled lowly—and blew a raspberry right under your ear.
He finally backed off at the noise that produced, partly due to sympathy, mostly because you had new neighbours who probably wouldn’t appreciate a 2 am wake-up call. Settling back in his seat with a self-satisfied smirk across his lips, he let you lurch forward and attack him, playfully shoving and kicking at him, until your foot caught a particularly sensitive spot and he recoiled. Instinctively a hand went to his side and the other closed around your ankle, his head dipped a little at the pain that coursed through him.
You recovered quickly. “Sorry!” you said, your breath still coming in short bursts. “Sorry, Matty, I—are you okay?”
Matt nodded slowly. “I’m okay,” he said, then breathed a laugh through his nose. “Not sure why I ever believed I’d get an evening off being beaten up tonight.”
You giggled and lightly smacked his shoulder, managing to wrench your foot free from his hold before he could take advantage of it being in his grasp. You crossed your legs beneath you and leaned back against the pillows as you tapped your phone to check the time.
“You can go to bed now,” you said quietly.
“Huh? Thought all this practicing stuff was necessary.”
He bumped against your shoulder and smiled slightly, picking at a loose thread in the sofa. “It’ll be fine. Whatever happens is gonna happen no matter how you do it, right?”
“I did kinda say that.”
“You can kinda shut up.”
A comforting sort of silence enveloped the room then, one that you were happy to sit with. The bustle of Hell’s Kitchen was still loud outside, but in this apartment, in this room, it was just the two of you. That was how it was supposed to be. That was what you missed.
A gentle snore broke the quietude, and you turned your head to see your brother utterly knocked out. His entire body had fallen limp against the couch and for the first time in so long, he looked almost peaceful.
You stared at him. Subconsciously, your mind counted every visible injury, every patch of discoloured skin, everywhere that could have been the one that killed him.
You reached down to pick up his mask. It felt cold against your skin, a reminder that it had the terrifying ability to upturn your entire life. This one thing.
Your eyes lingered a bit before you tossed the mask across the floor and grasped the throw on the back of the couch. Gently leaning against your brother, careful not to wake or hurt him, you draped it across the both of you and closed your eyes. His slow breathing soothed you and in no time you were lost in your own dreams.
Daredevil Masterpost
send me the first sentence of a fanfic and i’ll write the next five, except i don’t know when to stop writing so i guarantee there’ll be more than five
#this is also not 5 lines#daredevil#daredevil x reader#matt x reader#matt murdock x reader#reader#reader fic#sister reader#sister!reader#mine#5 line fanfic#karen page#matt murdock
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Arranged marriage zhuiling AU where instead of being arranged to marry each other, Jiang Cheng keeps trying to set Jin Ling up with random girls from other clans after Jin Ling mentions he’s interested in marrying ‘someone’ because he doesn’t know Jin Ling meant Lan Sizhui, so Jin Ling keeps doing the most ridiculously annoying and unappealing things to scare off every girl who comes to Koi Tower and Jiang Cheng is ripping his hair out because you little brat, you said you wanted to get married???
Eventually, both of them are so exhausted from the miscommunication that Jiang Cheng investigates and finally finds out what’s wrong, then tells Jin Ling he has one more potential spouse for him to meet. Jin Ling is a pouting lackluster mess over it until his entire world stops when the doors to Koi Tower open and Lan Sizhui walks through.
#zhuiling#lingzhui#fic ideas#will probably actually write this soon ngl ahahaHAHAHA#poor JC not know wtf is going on#i feel like it’s more IC of him to actually think he’s helping instead of trying to force JL to marry anyone#bc he does love him and wants him to be happy#but both of them are so shit at communicating and JL is never gonna admit he likes LSZ to his uncle#so JC has to do his own digging to find out 😭#zhuiling musings#ok but what if JC finds out JL and LSZ love each other through Jingyi#lmfAOOOOO#Jingyi’s just like ‘your stupid moody niece is in love with my best friend you dumb purple slut’#ffffuuuuuuuuuuUUUUUUCCCCKKKK AHAHAHAHA#apple babble 🍎#mdzs au#arranged marriage au#married aspec ZhuiLing would be so cute tho I think about it a lotttttt 😭✨🌸
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dust and horror angel and demon themes,,,, they could totally parallel each other...... :3
dust=angel of death described in the delta rune prophecy (self declared) (i DEFINITELY elaborated on this one waayyyy before but anyways dust with a fucked up savior complex SAVE ME SAVE ME.... death is a blessing ass guy. life is torment and he will be the one to liberate monsters from their bodies and with the strength they provide to him be able to take down evil evil creation of pure misery that is the human ✨✨✨ dont worry his evil cackles are to HIDE HIS PAIN of saving everyone....... trust)
horror=demon that dragged everyone in horrortale into hell (as perceived by everyone else) (i think it would be a cool hc if everyone outside of snowdin viewed horror as literally a demon. maybe undyne preaches that. anyone outside of snowdin might be WAYYY worse because they starve for longer and literally take part in cannibalism so they might not have the same sort of mild sanity that snowdin residents do,,,, besides he DID kinda bring them all eternal suffering. kinda. nobody but undyne knows what happened at the core so she could totally just paint the story to blame horror fully)
ANYWAYS i like the possible dynamics this could have :333
dust to horror (please let me kill you PLEASE let me kill you i can end it all so peacefully wouldn't it be nice??? i promise ill make it quick just for you),,, horror to dust (i want you to live and suffer with what youve done i want you to watch all of your choices hit you one day and i'll be there and laugh at you. i'll keep you alive just to keep you suffering ok?)
OR dust to horror (you dont deserve to die you dont deserve to even be hurt by me. not because youre the exception but youre the Exception i absolutely loathe you so youll never get the sweet release of death :3) and horror to dust (just let me die already i dont wanna be here. youre supposed to be a savior right??? an angel?? then why don't you save me already when i need it more than anyone else)
#SHITS THIS OUT BECAUSE I NEED TO GET RID OF IT. my evil doppelganger will adore this post i've already shown them#this is definitely a bit of an exaggeration of their characters in my eyes but i love it :333#i dont think that dust is THIS deluded in my eyes and i dont think horror is this cynical. even tho theyre both still these traits#i came up with this idea while writing my mtt meets eachother fic :3#you can probably totally guess where i made the connection. thank you horrortale undyne for this one single thing#anyways i dont know how to shove killer into this LMAO. i was thinking like.... angel and demon on your shoulder to swap choices#but but triglycercule doesnt killer already have that with his stages??? well YES but both can be true at the same time :333#idk i dont have enough brain juices for this rn. so you get this half assed explanation 😭😭‼️‼️‼️#dust: we should kill this person. totally because they need to be freed and not because they piss me off#horror: no we should keep them alive but torment them so they never get the sweet release of death and suffer#and thanks to killer THEY CAN DO BOTH!!! YAAAAY!!!!! the powers of determination are awesome man (smug tiktok emoji)#dust is sounding awfully similar to a certain killer au of mine i made..... swapinverse rearing its ugly head once again smh#idk if this is more of a symbolic thing or LITERALLY angel dust and demon horror#because i like both ideas........ imagine an actual angel dust and demon horror going around with killer doing the little dialogue i said#what would killer be in this??? he's not a mortal or a human as would be per usual when describing whats between an angel or demon#killer as a god lmao..... noooo noooooo..... maybe just something akin to one. i meaaan technically-#someone who's more into religious theming would probably eat this idea but i cant be bothered uaghhhh#if i say anything about killer i will get shot. but i can tank a couple bullets. killer does have the ability to let both dust and horror#fufill their own ideologies. and also i am a big fat SUCKER for killer keeping horror and dust 'in line' IDC if its a bad sanses concept#i love it and therefore it's now mine to use in an only mtt context. otherworldly beings trio ‼️‼️ aghhhhh#i have like 89 drafts if the drafts reach 100 by the end of the year i think i'd DIE. so this is getting posted idc#you wont see me using literal angel and demon dust and horror. but if you look in my mind you'll see the themes regularly in what i talk ab#anyways back to writing this stupid fic i go. dust is currently battling several inner demons rn. good luck loser :3#killer sans#dust sans#horror sans#murder time trio#sans au#utmv#tricule hc
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my new rot is making sharp & ronen take in sebastian at the end
#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#aesop sharp#its a bit of a weird mix ngl but its the idea of the ravenclaw not letting seb be given to azkaban but still asks professors for advice#so she asks sharp AND ronen and hecat for advice. i think in the end there's just too much in azkaban to make it unjustifiable#but something does need to be done with sebastian. the next best thing is expulsion but that just leaves him more vulnerable to influence#so its personalized mentorship. i like the idea of sebastian learning how to manage with sharp bc sharp as we know#has a secret room with walls filled with art. ronen is a fellow slytherin with a penchant for learning and empathic understanding to#the struggles of children#i love the slytherin professors man. hecat was an unspeakable and also understands the under the table shit students do#i think theyre equipped to help one kid after a murder considering with the state od azkaban (which sharp should know as well as maybe hecat#isn't really an option#i think sebastian is so Ferally TM curious. regardless of anne i do think he wouldve dabbled still in dark arts#but probably just never so far as the game but i wouldnt put it past him#hs rambles#i say not an option mostly bc iyk the hufflepuff quest it is mentioned to be p bad and its obv with Helen that there are people who think#that the prison needs reform esp with the dementors#ominis even says they may never see sebastian again. its a equal playing field regardless of who it seems? idfk i never got into hp but idk#id love to send sebastian to prison but i also do not like the prison so i need alternatives for my fic ideas#let sebastian have hobbies honestly thats the end game for my sharp & sebastian & ronen rot#abraham ronen#i just want more professor content that isnt just sharp thank u good day
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I'm at the painful "confession" scene during the kage summit arc. It really is so emotional, but also... hm.
When I was younger, like 13 or so, I was a big Sakura and Naruto shipper. They were the first pairing I read fanfic for even. And in a way, I do still enjoy the two of them together... but it's moments like these that really drive home the fact that it Doesn't really work in canon. Not the way that it's set up.
As Sakura puts it, "Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke! That's all you think about!"
She's told that Naruto has feelings for her and decides to use it to convince him to stop going after Sasuke. She does love him, but not in the way she's trying to confess. The love they share is one of comradery, not necessarily romantic. The love of two people who have gone through such pain together, and who have leaned on each other throughout it all. And the fact that she's turning around and saying she loves him "simply like everyone else", now... it's trivializing. And the fact that she's trying to convince him of this, the fact that she thinks she Can convince him of this, is pretty hurtful. They've come a long way from when they were kids, Naruto the goofball vying for her attention while she yelled at him for being stupid. Sakura respects Naruto so much more than before, and Naruto respects her too. So the fact that she's still doing this... She's desperate, really. She thinks the promise he made to her to bring Sasuke home is what's driving him to let himself be hurt over and over and over again in the pursuit and protection of Sasuke.
But she's wrong.
That may be part of it, but it's only part. Naruto wants Sasuke back for himself, too. He let himself be beat up to avoid selling him out. He chases after him with single minded determination. Sasuke is his entire drive to get stronger, to catch up, to bring him home. Sasuke, Sasuke, Sasuke indeed.
As it is, Naruto knows she's lying to herself. And no matter what she says, he will keep going after Sasuke. Because that's just the person that Naruto is.
#speculation nation#fanny watches naruto#i think. naruto and sakura could potentially work out... but probably in a poly kind of situation.#because naruto will never forget about sasuke. and tbh neither will sakura. at least in canon.#of course i think sakura would do well to end up with someone more level headed. like ino.#someone without all the Complications that those two have...#but at the same time. i still do really love the idea of two people supporting one another through thick and thin.#i like naruto and sakura as a pairing of mutual respect. which is why it doesnt truly work as it is in canon.#especially when it comes to things like the 'joke' punches. but that's Everywhere in this anime.#female characters' anger being turned into jokes. theyre 'scary' but its not Actually scary.#naruto taking punch after punch from her for being foolish. yet it's all just a joke.#tbh id want to do away with that trope entirely. sakura has a temper but she's a good person. a kind soul.#i dont like that kishimoto has her being casually abusive with one of her best friends.#yet another part of the misogynistic writing that i hate.#sure enough. as it is in canon it just doesnt work. but ykno what. 13 year old me is still here. and wants to think of a way that it Could.#all things to think about. i wonder if there is any poly fic with the 3 of them. theres Gotta be.#though that brings the question of whether it'd even fit my ideal concept of the 3 of them.#it's certainly not the popular kind of thing lol. most people pick one of the three pairings between them.#but ya kno what. ive always been a multishipper. and poly ships really enable that truth of mine.#maybe i'll look for some poly fic sometime. just to see if theres anyone doing it like id wanna see.#if it's just two guys fighting over one girl or something tho im Outta there.#and ALSO theres something to be said for sasuke and sakura's relationship when they were kids.#there was trust there. confiding. he respected her. & in the end. he thanked her for her care.#cant be Just the two of them tho. for me. bc that erases naruto's significance to them both.#it is perhaps another thing i'll want to write someday. just maybe.
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obsessed w the tags on ur last reblog
Omgg, thank you haha, it was a quality post so I just had to appreciate it in full force 😂❤️
Can‘t believe someone would actually enjoy my yapping :,D
#guys help is it time for a rebranding?? am I just gonna post about f1 now??#I still can’t believe this has all started because bestie and I were watching Ted Lasso (because I’ve been obsessed with that show for a#while now too) and I paused the episode to talk about how I really like the way Jamie interacts with kids (I’m sorry people being good with#and nice to kids is one of my weaknesses I work with kids now and have been invested in treating kids well forever)#so me saying that apparently reminded her of max and she showed me a video of him with p and yeah it was very effective in making me like#him and then we left the episode on pause and she told me a lot about f1 and max specifically cause I was interested now lmao (funny thing#is that she also got roped into it by our other friends I swear it’s speeding lmao#she also compared him to Jamie from Ted lasso (if you know you know) and showed me some heart wrenching Taylor swift edits (i haven’t#emotionally recovered yet) and yeah that’s how I started consuming way too much f1 content on YouTube and got into this whole mess lmao#oh yeah our friends also made me and another friend make a Tier list for all the drivers based on vibes alone (cause I only knew a bit about#max at that time and the other one knew nothing really) which was very funny too#especially looking back at it (we did some of them so dirty lmao 😂)#I’ve also come to the conclusion that tumblr is still one of the least annoying platforms to engage with other people (still)#YouTube is full of hate comments about drivers and stuff it’s so annoying actually#not to mention Twitter but I don’t go there and probably never will 😂#I personally don’t enjoy fics and scenarios and shipping of real people cause it makes me a bit uncomfy (not judging people who do#you do you as long as it doesn’t negatively affect anyone#but yeah I’d much rather just scroll by those here than have to look away from all the mindless hate and which driver is better discussions#everywhere else like I’m not one to engage with stuff like that but it does upset me to some#degree so yeah tumblr making memes and being rather positive about their drivers (most of what I’ve seen here of course there are gonna be#annoying people everywhere) is much more tolerable and a lot more enjoyable for me#whoops this post got away from me again oh dear#I’ve had the idea for a meme stuck in my head for days now: Max verstappen but make it if you don’t love me at my *swearing on team radio#giving spicy replies and attitude to the media maxplaining and complaining going for risky overtakes* you don’t deserve me at my *precious#interactions with p talking about his cats being a goofball with other drivers and especially danny defending other drivers driving#beautifully in the rain* it’s a package deal you can’t just pick and choose and personally I don’t even get why people complain about some#of the other stuff I appreciate someone who’s passionate and honest and genuinely kind where it matters 🤷🏻♀️#I think I’ve seen someone else say that but the more people complain about and criticize max the more I feel the need to defend him#god forbid women have hobbies for real (can’t believe I’ve yapped so much I can’t put more tags 💀)#also shoutout to Oscar Piastri and Danny Ric (I was so happy Oscar won even tho McLaren where being very silly in a not so funny way)
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its been 4 years since i first watched be more chill how has it been that long
#watched as in watched a slime tutorial#but its such a fundamental part of me even if i dont really like it now#like if i didnt see that video of lauren marcus playing agtikbi on ukulele i dont think id be playing as many instruments as i do now#it also led to me being a liana flores fan#and the username i use on most websites is related to one of the characters#i was probably super annoying to my friends during my bmc era since i was the only one in our friendgroup who liked musicals😭#it had a chokehold on me for at least 4 months which might not seem like much but it’s enough to shape who i am today#*cough cough like tallyhall*#i also never watched the two river version in its entirety i genuinely like the one on broadway#or liked#its been a while since i watched a bmc boot#okay that’s enough rambling i just woke up and thought of voices in my head for some reason#the more you know about tumblr user variationsoncloud#waitactually before i stop writing i just remembered that bmc was the reason i found out hanukkah was a thing because of a boyf riends fic#im so glad i didnt know how to make new social media accounts at the time#ESPECIALLY FOR TWITTER AND TUMBLR#okay thats it#thank you for listening to my ted talk#i lied in editing this just to add that this is probably what im gonna think about myself in the 4 years about my falsettos or tbom era#im* i wish it was easier to edit tags on mobile since i have no idea how to do it without rewriting the entire tag#okay no more tags#for now#thank you for listening to my ted talk again
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vi arcane is making me see the naked but bandaged chest potential and i may be making adjustments to my post code death qetoiles design
#which is funny bc in the original skin design he Is wearing bandages . im the one who put that man in a crop top#i keep making comparisons between vi and etoiles in my head now i cant help it . theyre both the Protector archetype#vi’s like the fully realised version of that archetype though like we see just how the Role of Protector ends up making her miserable lol#like she dedicates her whole life to this idea of who she’s supposed to be and when she fails to live up to this because she is human and#makes mistakes and is more than an archetype she struggles on how to like . live anymore . and she’s always caught between the people she#wants to protect#and this is very qetoiles core yknow but it never was pushed as far as it is for vi . probably bc a written show and mcrp are two different#formats . but dw this archetype will be Pushed for qetoiles in my fics . rubs hands evilly#minus the whole ‘protect people’ he got from the code which he made into his mantra i do think it’s a bit more implicit for etoiles#<- especially the self destructive aspects of it . bc i think it’s easy enough to recognise how much he loves helping and protecting people#but u need to watch him a bit more to really get how much he based his self worth around his ability to lol#jay rambles
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how the fuck is it already november 25th?!!?!!?
(time is so fucked up)
anyway, happy one year anniversary to my fic “if only there was more time” and posting on ao3 for the first time!
sincerely can’t believe that i’ve been writing for a year, how did that happen???
#i still can’t believe i decided to post anything at all#i remember wanting to keep fic writing to myself#but right after clicking post on ch 1 i went to my roommates and was like#guess what i just did!!!!#i didn’t even know i liked creative writing until this fic#but i feel so incredibly happy that i found this hobby#it helped me in so many ways#it got me out of the cave#i got my creative spark back that i foolishly thought i lost#this is the largest writing project i've ever worked on#i had no idea what i was doing at any point#the idea just needed to get out and i tried my best#is it completely accurate to the characters? probably not but who’s to say?#i like to think i have some idea now but i can never really be sure#i sincerely love this fic despite its flaws it'll always hold a special place in my heart#also still can’t believe that ppl actually liked it and left such nice comments!! that's actually crazy!!#like i’ll never get over that it still doesn’t feel real#here i am now with 6 works and 227k words in total written#that is so fucking much i have no idea how i did that#and how the fuck did i write this fic in less than 6 months??? where did that drive go???#anyways shout out to my followers that are here bc of this fic#i love you more than anything <3#and to the few that have read the entire series: i will write the last installment one day!!#i will not leave it unfinished!!
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I decided to give a go to @niennanir’s lovely print-your-own-fic recipe on my Inside and Out as a test run and I’m quite pleased with the results as a first pass :D
I wish I’d taken a few more process pictures but there was a slight lull as I had to go shopping for 12x12 cardstock lol, but! I do have a couple closeups/extras that I added for funsies :D
I went with freehanding the title and I think in the future I would opt to not do that lol, at least not without a printed template. That said, both LibreOffice and SAI refuse to recognize my SCII fonts >:0 If you notice on the first page, I used the Ace Attorney font in italic haha, it’s an okay alternative even if it’s not what I actually want |0 I am happy with the gold detailing tho :3c
I did have an unconscionable amount of fun freehanding the ship caption tho ahh <3 <3 Immediate happy stims upon completion, their names together look so pretty ♥ Credit to Zarla’s original minicomic on that one :3
I also managed to get the last sentence of the fic isolated on the last page thanks to the formatting haha ♪
I was also able to add a bookmark! Ma happened to have a couple very thin ribbons to choose from and red ended up complementing the green very prettily!
It reminds me of VUX tongues hehehehe ❤️💕💖💞
#What do I tag this lol#SCII#I am continually and incurably in love with papercrafts <3#Hard to believe it's been since Pokemon Homestyle since I've given anything a go! These darn talented artists inspiring me! Lol#Honestly tho I would absolutely recommend this project :D The prep work is manageable and friendly and the action itself is enjoyable#Depending on how much you enjoy repetitive motions haha ♪ Folding and creasing the pages was very relaxing to me :)#I went for my own fic as a first run since y'know - I have very direct access to it lol#Plus it'd be less sad if I messed something up - I want to do right by my favourites from other artists! I'm allowed to make my own mess lol#Also finally convinced me to return to the loving embrace of LibreOffice after like a decade away lol#I just never had a reason to redownload it! Wordpad does exactly what I want 95% of the time!#But it couldn't do columns so okayyyyy fiiiiine I'll get it again (lol) I do rather like it :)#There's still some things I'd change! I'm sure you can see from the pages where you can see both edges that the layout's a bit uhmmmm#Skewed? Corner-heavy? Lol just a matter of changing the borders :) LibreOffice's measurements are wack tho :P#But I fully intend to do this again! :D Print a few test sheets first >:3c Legitimately looking forward to it!#Probably gonna do another one of mine next before I give a go to someone else's I'd like to keep#I have ideas for how to improve! And better and more plentiful supplies! It makes me want to make! :D#Oh yeah and being in the book-making mood reminded me of one of the Vargas-as-a-psuedo-bible ideas I had but didn't put anywhere lol#If I may posit for your consideration: Before as the Old Testament and After as the New Testament :3c#I'd Absolutely buy two versions - And a full version for the record lol I would easily own multiple copies of physical!Vargas lol#Fun thought to me hehehehe ♪♫
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