#mordred and Merlin’s relationship save me

[oleryn]

all merlin had to do to circumvent the prophecy of arthur’s death was take mordred in and turn him into a little arthur fanboy. it’s a win-win situation. merlin gets to gush about his man crush to this random ten year old and mordred gets a bunch of cool knights to love him and raise him. he’d hear about his destiny to kill arthur from someone and simply go “why the actual fuck would i do that.”

[fuckingfandomfreak]

lots of complaining underneath sorry I couldn’t fit everything in the tags like usual

I am genuinely convinced that so many Merthur shippers actually ship Arwen but identify more with Merlin, so they just recreate Arwen’s dynamic (simp, over-protective Arthur and I-can-take-care-of-myself!, always-right!, actual-saint! girlboss) and give it to Merthur. Reasons for this are racism (obviously), the fact that early seasons merlin likes to read (scholarly books on magic not a fucking romantasy mind you), early seasons Merlin being 12 lbs, and the fact that Merlin has magic (cool powers, gay allegory, and is oppressed). Other reasons, too, but these I think really contribute to people directly projecting onto him like they do Morgana. I think this makes people feel personally victimized when Arthur does anything to Merlin bc he’s blond jock and Merlin is bookish, sassy nerd.

But fanon merlin is nothing like actual merlin. Merlin is a MAN; he’s just as arrogant as every other MAN. He’s a bit of a fucking lit bro that thinks he’s underappreciated bc he’s into important, valuable things instead of sports (for idiots). He canonically an genius and he’s many times insufferably arrogant, too.

But only Arthur needs to fix his arrogant bc Arthur’s arrogance is jock bro, so it’s more immediately recognizable and disliked. Even tho, I don’t actually find Arthur that arrogant, or i just can’t forget that most of Arthur’s arrogance is a front for insecurity. He’s only sincerely arrogant about sword fighting (which I don’t mind bc he’s literally the best swordsman in the kingdom and it’s not bragging if it’s true) and little presumptuous bc he’s a wealthy royal.

But this is a long winded way to say that some Merlin fanfics feel like weird revenge fantasies (romantasies??? but not in the book genre way) of nerdy girls with their high school football players mixed with a little class anger (but in the most insincere way bc morgana is never criticized for being rich bc she’s mostly portrayed as a gay white woman, and people don’t understand, or don’t want to address, intersectionality).

Which means Merlin’s actions don’t get judged, but do get examined and then excused, until they are in relation to Morgana. Bc Morgana is ACTUALLY skinny, oppressed, gay allegory, cool powers, always right, sassy, genius, sword fighting, resistance fighter white girl that constantly wins every argument she has with Arthur and makes him look like an idiot. That’s why she gets way more forgiveness and grace than Arthur even tho she is a 1000x worse person. It’s also why she and Merlin are usually besties (especially over him and Gwen) even tho they canonically have a very big political fallout.

Even with the Lamia episode. I have seen so much discourse (and a good amount of fics) that criminalizes the knights (jocks) for their treatment of Merlin (and sometimes Gwen) with people wanting them to prostrate themselves in guilt and then get put into the infirmary by Arthur for daring to hurt Merlin when they were LITERALLY ENCHANTED. Obviously, they themselves would feel guilty, but that doesn’t mean they SHOULD. And Merlin is not fucking lectured or made to apologize when he is enchanted to, and attempts to, KILL Arthur. Like, yeah, okay, the knights grabbed him and were mean to him, but Merlin’s a grown fucking man, the most powerful sorcerer, and, by now, literally physically bigger than both Gwaine and Elyan. He’s fine.

I thank god everyday that Arthur wasn’t there during that fucking episode. Every fucking merthur fanfic would’ve been insufferable.

I will never forgive fandom how unfair it is about Arthur

Dark Merlin It's usually good angst. You know, Merlin had had enough. Dark Arthur? Arthur is a fucking rapist, a monster.

Merlin guilty? Merlin feeling guilty and comforted by the entire cast. Arthur guilty? Arthur doing the worst things possible and someone razing him to the ground

Merlin always gets these nice things. always flowers, courtship, everything. Found family? Everyone comforts Merlin because big bad Arthur. (literally almost every Merlin "found family" is everyone loves Merlin and treats Arthur like shit)

Merlin gets an apology. Arthur? My parents will love me faster than someone will apologize to Arthur in fanfiction.

"suicidal, self-harming Merlin" but Arthur has no right to have mental problems (a whole lot of people have wanted him dead since he was born)

Protectivr knights? Always about Merlin.

Even the fucking omegaverse. Alpha Merlin is a nice calm creature who pretends to be a beta. Alpha Arthur... wild animal, keep Merlin in a cage.

No. Just no.

(forever grateful to those stupid British people that arthur never told merlin he was fat. because the fandom understands that something is a comedy if merlin says it. if arthur it would be ,,abuse")

[tongjaitongjai]

An AU where Merlin is literally a God in Mordred’s eyes. Like, a genuine God.

In this AU Mordred and Merlin’s relationship is not fucked up by prophecy. So, everytime, kindhearted Merlin saved Mordred without hesitation. And Mordred grew up in a Druid camp that reinforced the idea that Emrys was a literal god. So naturally, HE WORSHIPPED MERLIN.

Once Arthur became king and magic was legalised, Mordred came to Camelot to become a knight because that was the best way to serve Emrys.

But when he arrived at Camelot, he struggled to comprehend the fact that Merlin was… human???? A very clumsy one, in fact. The rest of Camelot, though might know about Merlin magic, did not know how great ‘Emrys’ actually was so they were just confused, concerned, and/or entertained by Mordred’s ‘crush’ on Merlin.

He would stare at Merlin the entire first meal they had together, and people would be like: awww, Sir Mordred is crushing on Merlin so hard!!

Mordred: Emrys??eats??food?Food??Is ?eaten?by? Emrys?emrys?consumes?meal????

Or when he saw Merlin tripped on the training field

Mordred: i think the area is cursed. Strongly cursed.

Leon: what—

Mordred: THEN WHY ELSE WOULD EMRYS TRIPPED?????

Arthur: So, how have you adjusted to life in Camelot so far? Is there anything that is bothering yo—

Mordred: Merlin

Arthur: what did my stupid manserva- I mean Court Sorcerer do-

Mordred: I saw him drank water today

Arthur:

Mordred: He just drinks water????? From glass?????? Like?? He drank?? Water???? You know??? Literal water????????????? For drinking???HE??needs??water?to??live?why??

Morgana: why did I saw Mordred ran out of the meeting room screaming that you guys are trying to ‘Destroy his faith in his religion’. You knights better not bully him because he is a druid and has magic—

Gwaine: I told him Merlin is not here because he needs to take a shit.

Lancelot: Hey, Mordred, I noticed that Merlin has not received the note I asked you to deliver to him yet.

Mordred: But I already send it to him?

Lancelot:

Lancelot: Tell me how

Mordred: I burned it at the altar

Lancelot: what altar—

Mordred: and pray to him, as one should???

Merlin: WHY IS THERE SOMEONE SCREAMING IN MY HEAD THAT I HAVE AN IMPORTANT MEETING TOMORROW AT NOON!?

Or when they went on a long mission or hunting and Merlin, out of his old habit, made food for the knights

Mordred: ‘this is the most excellent food ever had bestowed on me, I shall never forget about this Emrys. I will pray to you even harder. I am the luckiest Druid to ever live—- ‘

Percival: … is the stew that good?

part 1| part 2 | part 3

[churrochamp]

Let's talk about Merlin and lying. This isn't meant to be character bashing, but it might not be the most generous take either.

In All About Love, bel hooks writes: "In our culture privacy is often confused with secrecy. Open, honest, truth-telling individuals value privacy. We all need spaces where we can be alone with thoughts and feelings - where we can experience healthy psychological autonomy and can choose to share when we want to. Keeping secrets is usually about power, about hiding and concealing information."

(hooks has a lot more to say about the reasons why people lie in relationships, and our need for love and difficulty with love in general. Book is fantastic, highly recommend.)

The question is: was Merlin's years of lying about his magic, and all that he did in Arthur's defence, justified? Why'd he do it?

I've been trying to think through how the fandom generally interprets Merlin's character and choices in the show, and how this character makes me feel. It's really complicated and interesting (to me at least lol).

I often see the claim that Merlin lied about his magic for years out of fear for his safety, but it's never fully satisfied me as an explanation. Given that as a fandom we pretty much all agree that magic can be a metaphor for queerness, there's a natural alignment with the claim that queer people aren't ever obligated to come out, for any reason, but it's often said, especially if their physical safety might be jeopardized (which I agree with btw).

And it's true, given Camelot's genocidal laws, Merlin's life could be threatened if he revealed himself as a sorcerer. On the other hand, Merlin is basically all-powerful in the universe of the show, and I don't think the rest of Camelot could do much to him if he were prepared.

What's more convincing to me is the claim that Merlin's afraid of the potential emotional harm that could come from revealing himself. What if Arthur hates and rejects him? That's something his magic can't defend against.

I think Merlin's heart is in the right place. He believes all his work is done in service of Arthur and their joint destiny, which is the good of Albion. And he does save Arthur's life a whole dang lot.

The issue is, probably a good half of the show's major conflicts directly relate to Merlin's actions and inactions - usually, lies he's telling (Morgana, Mordred...). Conflicts that maybe could have been resolved with much less harm if Merlin, who often is the only one with crucial knowledge, had made different choices (and Gaius too oh my GOD). Dude is shooting himself in the foot. Merlin's lying isn't just about personal privacy and autonomy. It becomes a fundamental part, baked into his relationship with Arthur and his role in their prophecy (and the governing of a kingdom jeez).

In addition to plot SNAFUs, the way I see it, Merlin's lying has two major consequences for him:

His most important relationship, with Arthur, is deeply flawed and incomplete.

Merlin remains the most important, influential character in the show. His energies go to trying to keep the power for himself.

As bel hooks argues, there can't be true intimacy in a relationship if one or both parties withhold and deceive the other. This could look like lying to manipulate the other party to get what you want, or even lying to make the relationship go easier. Relationships built on untruth aren't fair to all parties - the deceived person can't make informed choices in the relationship, and the deceiving person robs themselves of the opportunity to be fully supported and loved for who they are. When Merlin lies to Arthur about magic, when he tells Arthur that magic is evil, even if it is for "his sake," he's taking choice away from Arthur often at crucial moments, for both their relationship and the well-being of the kingdom. Without knowledge of the truth about magic, and about Merlin, Arthur can't make fully informed choices as a king or a partner. Things go to shit, and it's terribly lonely for both of them, even if only one of them know about it. Merlin's reason for this might be fear of pain. However, when you don't give someone the opportunity to love or reject you for who you are, how can you feel held by that person? You deprive yourself of the chance.

Another reason to lie can be desire for power and control. By keeping the secret of his magic and their destiny, Merlin keeps all the responsibility and power to himself. This is the premise of the show: Merlin is the only person who can turn Arthur into a good king, save magic, secure Albion's future well-being--and he must do it all secretly. The show jokes about it, the characters joke about it. This premise is a kind of power-fantasy - being the secret power working from the shadows, using all your wit and guile to succeed despite the secrecy, risking life and limb for no recognition, but having the satisfaction of knowing that you are instrumental. It's very James Bond. Without the secrecy, what would be the point of Merlin? The secrecy might be part of what makes Merlin feel special, worthwhile.

As the years go by, the lies compound and the relationship becomes inseparable from them. The most significant on a personal level, probably Merlin's poisoning Morgana, Mordred, Ygraine, and Sophia.

Merlin can't control all the factors, he can't do it all by himself, he can't make Arthur into the ideal king and boyfriend of destiny, and from the start it's a doomed endeavour. Luckily Arthur loves him all on his own, and does get to see him at the very end, and they'll get a second chance.

So in summary, why does Merlin lie about his magic and his actions for so long? Fear, love, and power, is what I suggest. And ultimately it leads him and Arthur to ruin. It's not exactly exemplary behaviour, but it is very very human.

[comma-souptra]

BBC Merlin 10th rewatch thoughts compilation:

(this is also my first full rewatch since I was literally 18 so prefrontal cortex is notably more developed or whatever)

This is SO long and rambled because it’s for me and putting my thoughts down on my blog! But feel free to peruse bc I am just crying sobbing putting words down. Thoughts under the cut for spoilers <3

-fuck this show fr

-starting off strong with Angel Coulby you are the most beautiful woman and the most perfect Guinevere possible

-something interesting is how much more the lack of communication drove me bonkers this time around, like please just explain everything in detail to each other we could solve so many problems

-Merlin also seems like so much more of an ill-moraled character this go around? Like he is truly so morally grey and his logic for “should I do this” is deeply just “does it in any potential way benefit Arthur/the fuckass prophecy”

-TO THE POINT THAT he’s literally like Magic’s #1 Hater for five straight seasons AND can’t see that he is actively making the prophecy unfold every single time

-Gwen/Morgana gfs my angels I’m so sorry this happened to you

-Morgana should have had a friend so badly like one friend (not Morgause) would have saved her

-same exact sentiment for Mordred

-Merlin/Arthur and Merlin/Gwaine literally no comments

-actually this show invented polyamory and throuples would have saved many of you

-ON THE TOPIC Lancelot so badly is both Arthur and Merlin’s queer awakening in my heart. I do think Merlin likely already knew (Will) but I think his relationship to Lancelot made queer relationships seem feasible in some form

-I do not think Arthur knew at all and that’s why he looks so damn confused every time he interacts with Lancelot

-Lancelot is around for SO much less than I ever remember too he really is just stepping in to be pretty and complicate the narrative and then leave again

-Arthur needs glasses so severely I fear because I can excuse a lot of the missing magic moments but I watched Merlin lock eyes with him and use magic during that S5 dice game you can’t explain that one away

-Gwaine my beloved! Proof that a fictional man can be both a butch lesbian to the women in his life and a pansexual man to everyone else

-Morgana and Morgause…. This script is fruity as hell can we be for real. Both actresses said “yeah we played it a little queer” I fear the BBC was not brave enough to give Morgana an evil fucked up gf and went the Kill la Kill route

-I think by Elyan’s death all the knights fully must know that the ambiguous secret Merlin seems to have is in fact his magic and they are just choosing not to say anything out of respect for him (“he’s tell us when he’s ready”)

-EXCEPT: Leon doesn’t know. I do however think Leon just thinks Merlin is gay.

-Gwaine absolutely knows there’s literally no way around that one

-Gwen I feel also had an inkling that Merlin had magic, which I feel is supported by her and Gaius’ conversation in S5E13, I do also think she thinks he’s gay

-I also do think Merlin is gay

-I forgot how much of a through-line the joke that Merlin crossdresses is, it comes up at least three times

-tangentially related, the early friendship between Morgana and Merlin… I mourn u every day! The friends they could’ve been and how happy he was when he thought she knew he had magic (S1? When she thinks he has a crush on Gwen)

-also I forgot how much angst Merlin had about magic towards Gaius, several (justified) comments about how Gaius doesn’t understand what he’s going through

-also so so interesting is that I feel like in so many Magic Revealed fics, we write Arthur responding with shock & confusion & anger (which all rock big fan), but in the finale, once he understands that Merlin is so for serious a sorcerer, he’s just so scared of him?? Which was crazy I don’t think that has sunk in before how scared he looks

-and then they start to get over it and we get the reminiscing about their fight from the first day they met where Merlin confesses to using magic and we get the devastating exchange “you cheated” “you looked like you were going to kill me!” “I should have”

-damn major nostalgia vibe killer from Arthur, DEVASTATING on this rewatch

-also S5E12 when Gwaine and Merlin and traveling through the valley of the fallen kings and get jumped by bandits and Merlin gets cornered and HOLLERS for Gwaine thank you BBC that one lives rent free in my head always

-fuck this dragon for real also because Merlin DOES kind of fail like none of the shit they planned for happened, they got pieces but so much more COULDVE worked out without this fuckass dragon whispering in Merlin’s ear every day Kilgharrah it’s on sight dude

-finally maybe the most sickening parallel I have to offer is S4E13 when Isolde is dying and she and Tristan are reminiscing on the plans they had that are obviously not going to happen anymore and she says “hold me”

-which obviously is striking a significant chord with Arthur as it spurs him to reconcile with Gwen (thank god everyone cheered)

-(also why was the full breadth of her enchantment never discussed back to miscommunication please she didn’t cheat on him like that justice for Gwen’s rep I’m sick)

-BUT ALSO! A season later in S5E13 we get Merlin and a dying Arthur with Merlin trying to explain that they have so much to do so Arthur can’t die, and Arthur says “just hold me”

-I will lose it every time about this one… watching half of a couple die and mourn the chance to live a life together and then mirroring that at your own death with the man you are unexplainably close and connected to

-also the “I’m going to say something I’ve never said to you before… thank you” had such a queer set up that even my parents thought it was going to be an “I love you” when we watched the show for the first time together in like 2014 so… it’s the Spanish supernatural finale dub in my heart

-I think that’s enough I’m just sick to my STOMACH over this show once again, obviously it’s a BBC show from 2009 so it’s not without criticism but it’s genuinely my favorite TV show I’ve ever seen without competition. There is a deeply clear allegory for queerness that has drawn in and continues to draw in queer fans constantly and keep the viewership active. I also just love so badly how campy and classic it is, it’s one of the few pieces of media I have in DVD because I fear so badly to lose it. BBC Merlin I love u what a brilliant and silly and devastating tv show from 2009

[magicalmischel]

WIP TAG GAME 🌿

rules: make a new post with the names of all the files in your wip folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! and then tag as many people as you have wips

thanks for tagging me @regulusrules ! 💖

I have a lot of wips too 😂 most of these are for BBC Merlin, a few are for classic who. I hope I don't forget anything, I keep a list but I haven't updated it in like a year 😂

BBC MERLIN WIPS

The Crystal Hunters; 45k

a canon era time travel fic with merthur and morgwen, set during the Great Purge. There's lots of plot, magic, crystals, old castles and running.

Layers of Dusk; 17k

a darker fic where Arthur dies and so Merlin tries his hand at necromancy

Give Me Your Hand, I'll Give You Mine; 1300 words

canon era, merthur, magical injuries caused by the great purge and a magic reveal.

"the medieval roommates valentine fic" (untitled); 2500 words

merlin is forced to stay in arthur's chambers 24/7 bc of plot. Not sure if I'll ever finish this one tbh

Rhythm of Love; ??k

glastonbury festival fic where arthur returns + musician!merlin. I have no idea how many years ago I started this, definitely pre-2018 though. Idek if I still have the draft somewhere ;-;

Suddenly Flames Everywhere; 77k

;-; i think abt this fic every day and try to work on it at least once a week ;-; i wanted to post it for acbb 2023 but i ran out of time, and then once the deadline was gone, so was most of my motivation 😂 it's a merthur enemies to lovers dragon!merlin soulmate canon au that I care about very very much. pls ask me abt it if you want maybe it'll kick me into working on it more 😂

The Light of Knowledge; ?????k

oof this is an old one. started it way back in 2014 and I'm honestly not sure if I still have the draft saved somewhere. All I remember is a big maze, lots of bad poems that I wrote in like the 9th grade and merthur 😂

Falling into Empty Space (??); 400 words lmao

basically a s1!merlin vs s5!merlin epic fight with time travel to 1x08 bc obviously killing kid!mordred is wrong, right? Right??

"ghost!merlin canon au fic" (untitled); 9k

exactly what it says in the title. damn i need to return to this ;-;

"cat!merlin fic" (untitled), 1000 words

canon era, merthur, magic reveal. Merlin transforms himself into a cat bc of course that is the absolute best way to get arthur to accept magic. it only makes sense in his head lmao

Burn Us Away (But Keep Me in Your Heart); 11.8k

canon soulmate au with a LOT of angst and a magic reveal

"the bird!merlin fic"; 1000 words

first written for merlin bingo 2021 but I never finished it ;-;

No Doubt in My Mind Where You Belong; 12k

a canon era trans!merlin fic with established relationship merthur

"cuddle fic" (untitled); 1300 words

written for fluffalooza 2023 but never finished ;-;

"one bed fic" (untitled); 1900 words

also written for fluffalooza but never finished bc it felt too ridiculous/cracky/ooc, but it might be worth reworking

"the weird tarot crack fic" (untitled); 2.8k

written for tarot fest 2023 but abandoned bc i came up with a better idea for the fest. I remember it was very cracky, I might return to it. Canon era merthur.

i might be forgetting some tbh, I've written a lot of drabbles that I later wanted to expand but never did ;-;

CLASSIC DOCTOR WHO WIPS

"jamie/10 + 11 fic" (untitled); 3.5k

the 10th doctor visits all his companions before regenerating into 11 including jamie <3

"twojamie war games "make it worse" fic" (untitled); 849 words

this is theoretically a fix-it but also i make it much worse first lmao, and i'm not sure yet how it ends either, so is it really a fix-it??

ok and I think that's it!! ;-; i did write a little something for each of the titles but hopefully not too much so if anyone sees this and wants to know more feel free to dm me

i'm not gonna tag 18 people though that's way too many 😂 I'll tag @insane-ohwhyfandoms (good luck) @lair-of-the-dragon @lesbianlefay @invisibility-superiority @queerofthedagger @wolfiery @haventacluewhatimdoing and @twojamie-o-clock <3

absolutely no pressure to do this though of course! 💖

[swans-chirping-in-the-distance]

hope you're doing okay!

mayhaps you tell us all about your favorite things in Merlin to get your mind off of things? I know like the smallest lore about the show dhfbfbfb and I want to know your thoughts on different characters and such.

Again I hope you're doing alright <33

Aww thank you that's so sweet 😭😭

I love love LOVE the desperation in Morgana's eyes when Mordred comes to her and tells her he knows where Emrys is. The way she brushes off his betrayal and rushes him to get to the point. Just the utter insanity in her eyes and the way she grips the arms of her thrown. She's completely lost it and it's amazing.

I love how close Mordred felt to Arthur and Merlin. He kept trying to prove himself to Merlin and saw them as kin ("she's one of US"). And he wanted to prove himself to Arthur too. He had faith in both of them. The way he fell to his knees to ask Arthur to spare Kara. He felt so close to them. He felt confident that he could open up to them and be vulnerable. Confident that they'd save her. And the sheer pain in his eyes, the tears mixing with his anger and shock as he breaks open his cell because he TRUSTED them. Mordred's story is so heartbreaking.

I will never not be mad at the wasted potential of Gwen. She was a compassionate servant/ blacksmith's daughter who fell in love with a guy who originally was a total prick, and she also gets into chaotic adventures with Merlin without even knowing his magic. I feel like we should've seen more of her being a good and much more understanding queen, more of her changing Camelot for the better. Arthur didn't want a wife who would walk around agreeing with everything he said, so why didn't we get to see more of that? There are multiple scenes with queen Gwen just sitting there the entire scene and not saying a word. And I felt personally robbed of more Gwen with weapons. She's a blacksmith's daughter guys please. And what about her being best friends with Morgana? She knows more about her than anyone else. I wish we could've seen more of her and her character because she's just so interesting.

I hate the Lancelot du Lac episode so much. Merlin knew that Lancelot was a shade or whatever you call it. Instead of figuring out WHY, it was just "Oh huh that's weird whatever" and they never figured it out. It makes Gwen and Arthur seem like a bad relationship because even when she betrayed him, a simple sorry was enough for him to ignore it and never bring it up again. Of course, he could see the guilt in her eyes, but still. No one realizing that she was enchanted gives such a bad spin on everything. How did no one put it together? Looking back at other Lancelot clips, he was NOT the same. How many insecurities did this cause in their relationship?

I would've loved Freya to actually be more relevant as Lady of the Lake. Merlin being able to talk to her and go to her. Gauis eventually meeting her. What if Gwen comes across Freya one day after Arthur's death, injured and alone, and meets an old friend of an old friend? Gets to know Freya and actually help the magic community. She knew Merlin had magic and was proud of him. She would trust the magic community, or at least parts of it. Freya reaching out to Merlin through a lake near where he's been waiting for Arthur and updating him about everyone. I'm rambling but I miss Freya and I love her.

Can we all talk about Mithian. She's so incredible to me. She walked up to a servant and just respectfully asked him to give her a chance. She valued Arthur and Merlin's friendship. When Arthur told her he wanted to be with another girl that wasn't even royalty, she just said she wanted to be that loved. Didn't judge her. You can't tell me her and Gwen wouldn't be friends.

Why did the writers seemingly forget that Merlin tried to kill kid Mordred, and Mordred said he wouldn't forget it. Looks like he did.

Also, wasn't The Great Dragon (I can't spell his name) supposed to take care of Aithusa?

[adhd-merlin]

merlin S1 rewatch: episode 6

it’s been a hot minute! today’s commentary is about episode 1x06, A Remedy to Cure All Ills. which I re-watched more than a month ago actually, but I’ve been busy.

just some random comments and thoughts (as usual), and not an actual review or analysis.

I think this episode is extremely underrated – I loved it the first time I watched it, and I still thoroughly enjoyed it on my rewatch. yes, it’s kind of a filler episode with a very traditional Villain of the Week format – but it's a great villain.

Julian Rhind-Tutt’s performance as Edwin is great and I love a suave, smooth-talking, scheming villain as much as the next person. The way he manipulates people, never suggesting anything outright but playing on people’s fears and biases, only saying just enough to make them reach the conclusion he wants. Something very Richard III about it. Very Iago.

EDWIN: “No… I shan’t say”

Another thing I love about this episode is the rare (unique?) instance of Merlin showing his magic to another sorcerer whom he isn't suspicious of (the audience knows Edwin is the Bad Guy, of course, but at this point Merlin doesn't).

I can’t think of another moment like this in the series. Freya didn’t actually have magic. There is Gilli, but when Merlin reveals his magic to him he already knows of the boy's intention to kill Uther, and it is a last attempt to stop Gilli from committing regicide without putting him in harm’s way. Merlin's relationship with Mordred and the Druids was always complicated by prophecies and by his role as Emrys.

But there’s none of that here. Edwin tells Merlin that magic can be used for good, and that it can be ENJOYED! which is all Merlin ever wanted to hear. And it’s a bit heartbreaking to see the hope on Merlin's face, knowing all that is going to happen later in the series.

I also loved the previous interaction between Merlin and Edwin:

“It can’t explain love”!! He’s a romantic. He loves love 🥺🥺🥺

I think the writers lost sight of Edwin’s motive a bit by the time they got to the ending. He’s not content with just killing Uther, he also wants to… rule the kingdom? And he tells Merlin they can do it together? (a concept revisited in the Cornelius Sigan episode). I don't think it works well.

I think Edwin’s final evil speech would have been way more impactful if he had tried to appeal to Merlin’s empathetic side, instead of his non-existent thirst for power, and reminded him of all the suffering Uther caused and why he deserved to die. I guess that would be a moral dilemma that deserves more than a few minutes of screen time to be resolved satisfactorily, and we’re already at the end of the episode at this point.

The series does dwell on it in To Kill the King, to be fair, but I think the “why not just let Uther die?” dilemma could have been presented before then. (Merlin's momentarily hesitation at healing Uther at the end is more to do with his fear of being seen using magic by Uther than by an actual reluctance to save the king.)

Anyway. I still think this is a very good episode overall, even with its relatively weak ending.

Other random thoughts:

The random-ass reference to alchemy. Something that wasn’t elaborated on, nor ever mentioned again (??) Missed opportunity imo.

Gaius is made "a free man of Camelot", whatever that means. (Does it mean that he, like Merlin, is not from Camelot? Or is it some kind of special privilege? We don’t know. I think maybe in Love at the Time of Dragons Gaius mentions something about he and Alice coming to Camelot but I can’t remember and I can’t be bothered to check now)

Some excellent display of brotherly concern from Arthur when Morgana falls sick. He's the one pushing for Uther to call for Edwin. We love to see it

Merlin and Gaius all but call each other father and son. DON’T TOUCH ME.

Gaius was 100% ready to let Uther die if it meant saving Merlin’s life. btw.

Gaius and Uther. WHAT ARE THEY

All the heavy hints at Gaius’s acting as a Category Traitor in the Great Purge + the only instance of Gaius talking to Kilgharrah (!!!) I am obsessed with it

The paralles between Uther & Gaius and Arthur & Merlin. I feel absolutely normal about it

“Now, open your eyes, My Lord. I want my face to be the last face you ever see.” -> I don’t care if it’s cliched, this line fucks

MERLIN CLAIMS ANOTHER VICTIM, AT LAST!! I was starting to worry but finally my baby is back to killing people :)

[someguyinc]

thinking about merlin's fucked up relationship with mordred and magic by s5,,

merlin as we know even in s1 would and has killed multiple times to protect and keep arthur safe with little remorse seeing as the end goal of having arthur alive was achieved like you could say that merlin did it out of duty, for the safety and future of all magical creatures,, but his relationship with mordred disproved that ten times over

mordred in s5,, was not a good man,, like when we find him he is working with what we can assume to be slave traders or at least people that deal in selling POWs or the like,, but as he said to merlin "we all do what we need to survive" (i'm paraphrasing),, he saves arthur and merlin from morgana and at the end is knighted

(how arthur forgot that mordred was the little druid boy i don't fucking know tbh talk to the writers on that one)

but mordred for all intents and purposes represents the potential future of camelot,, he is a druid and a knight,, a sorcerer and a protector of the king,, he knows and believes in the prophecy and want to bring forward a future where albion is united under king arthur,,

but merlin knows that he's also destined to kill arthur as well (now... if that is even true is another story bc why is kilgahrah the only one who has heard this part of the prophecy?? he's the only source on dragons we have, and if mordred raised knowing of the prophecy and emrys hadn't heard that where tf is kilgahrah getting is from?? but again another post another time)

and he doesn't trust mordred, he isn't kind, he doesn't show him any inch of grace, he waits for mordred to slip up and expose himself as a traitor, but ofc in doing so he furthers the prophecy and help creates the man who will eventually murder arthur (iron sharpens iron) but still cannot bring himself to directly murder mordred for whatever reason

and it's just fascinating to me because they have these moments where merlin does see glimpses of the future in mordred, ("until then we go unmarked in death as in life") and his heart softens, but he's so preoccupied with keeping arthur safe that in doing so he helps creates the blade that will run him through in the end and is literally fighting the symbol of the future that arthur is prophecied to bring about (a druid knight of camelot) based on the word of a dragon who outright admitted to manipulating him and visions of the future which he knows are fickle at best

[forsakenmissives]

I know nothing about football but I'd still like to hear about the au :3

see bc i complain and then i don't even know where to start LOL

ok so ig i'll start with the title From the Sidelines and a little description i have, to pique interest heh

Arthur is Camelot FC's star striker and captain. Merlin is the kitman. Life is hardly ever fair.

anyway . i suppose that's. a little misleading. that being said i think this grew into something waaaaay larger than i originally planned @.@ like it was supposed to be a fun little addition to the surprisingly small amt of footballer arthur fics we have but now this fic has double daddy issues (balinor my beloved...), coming out, sports injuries, shitty coaches (aredick die by my sword) and never making the national team. HUH??? i just wanted merthur to fuck on the pitch... (joke) (just in time for fuck him on the field friday)

also there's side stories. like one is when the players get handcuffed tgt for 24hrs but they've got an uneven amt for it and merlin gets roped in

and then there's the valentine's day arwen special that i somehow accidentally made into a statement about arthur's attitude toward his sexuality?? and feelings for merlin??? through his anxiety about his date with gwen????

“All good?” Merlin asks. “Never better,” Arthur replies, then pivots and walks directly into his closet. He stares at his barren shoe rack before he feels hands on his shoulders, and Merlin is turning him around and guiding him back out. “Wrong way,” he hears him say. “Right.” This time, Arthur marches out his room then down the hall to the front door. “I’ll be back.”

i'm allowed to give this info bc i don't know if i'll ever actually post the extras. i dont' even know when i'm gonna finish the main story sjkdfhgjkf

oh yeah another side story takes place in 2007 (that might be the title for it idk) and it's about uther buying camelot fc for arthur's tenth birthday LOL dont question the legaltiy of arthur playing for his father's club. i dont know and i dont care. this is fiction SIMILARLY dont say shit abt arthur being a striker and captain. it's happened before. it's literally fine. dont even worry about it

there's like. ik i rly only talked about the side stories but u have to realize just how much has already gone into this fic and i wouldn't even say i'm halfway done. i don't think i've written out a single match which is also funny bc i've been keeping up with the prem and actually think i can do it now. i just keep dragging my feet abt it lol

i think the hardest part for me is when im gonna have to seriously injure arthur. i didnt want to but i think it's an important way for his and merlin's relationship to progress and also would explain merlin's attitude toward him in january. its less abt injuring him and more abt him having to sit out of games not for like. lineup stats/compatibility reasons

oh my god typing this all out made me realize we haven't met like. half of the guys on the team yet. i was sitting here like "i need to rewatch eps with all the knights bc i dont trust myself to write percy and elyan accurately" but now i just realized i dont even know if mordred is on the like. squad yet or if he's still with the u18s (after a brief check with my info page he is. i'm gonna be sick)

like i said there is a LOT of info on this . sorry this was so long i just needed to ramble a bit and it also made me realize some info i still need to include so yayyy :3 thank you nonny if u have anything u wanna know in specific like fr anything PLEASE ask. i'd love it so much if u asked. u saved my life <3

[ambriel-angstwitch]

She Calls Me Back Arthur’s perspective

So I’ve already analyzed the original version through the lens of Merthur and it was very much Merlin’s perspective and I’m so happy that Kacey’s verse is applicable to Arthur.

I'm runnin' out of tears to cry They’re gone before they hit my cheeks

Near the end Arthur’s no longer the prince he once was in some ways that’s good but he’s also somewhat jaded. He’s been turned against again and again. It still upsets him but he’s not going to cry over his lost relationship with Morgana, Gwen or Mordred. He gets angry, confused and other emotions but he’s not allowed to show weakness like crying. The same applied to when he felt like Merlin betrayed him in the reveal.

Maybe it's the air out here Or maybe something's changin' me

Like I said Arthur changed over time. Though this also makes me think of Arthur’s death like I discussed so much in my first analysis. Arthur’s view on magic changes as they ride to attempt to save his life. Maybe it’s air the life that Merlin described the first time he considered accepting magic or maybe the something that’s changing him is love. If Merlin is magic it can’t possibly be evil.

If you think that you could wake me up Then you don't know how well I sleep

Arthur is stubborn this could be him thinking that Merlin can’t change his mind once he���s been decided.

You love me and I don't know why I only call you once a week

Arthur doesn’t make Merlin a priority. He doesn’t understand why Merlin cares about him so much. He brushes him off. He chose Gwen but Merlin’s still here. After the reveal he realizes it’s even worse than that he perpetuates a rule that would see all that Merlin is destroyed.

Does it bite at your edges? Do you lie awake restless?

Before the reveal Arthur wonders if Merlin worries about Camelot as much as he does, if he feels some of the burden that Arthur carried as his closest confident. After the reveal Arthur wondered if Merlin’s secret constantly ripped him apart. If Merlin laid awake wondering if it was his last. If Merlin worried not only death by his enemies but befalling it by those he cared for the most.

Why are you so obsessive? Hangin' on to every sentence? This town's the same as I left it My page is blank, but you read it You still dial 822-993-167

Arthur wondered why Merlin cared so much, why he was so devoted. He wondered how Merlin could read him like an open book, how he could provide the right words and advice.

[strangefellows]

Yknow what. Gil, Cu, Roman, and Komadori

favorite thing about them

Gil: How absolutely human he is, despite how inhuman he is at the same time. He's an egotistical arrogant childish petty loudmouth obnoxious bastard, but he's noble and brave and loves kids and was a legitimately good king, and despite every single reason you could name it should be otherwise he's Chaotic Good. Not even neutral, straight up GOOD. He's terrible, he's amazing, he's a hero and a tyrant and he's so, so very human, good and bad.

Cu: He just...there's this vibe about him that's so warm and gentle despite his fighty battle-loving attitude. He can be quiet and soft and warm and introspective, and there's hints around him that he's sadder than he lets on -- and god, looking at his myth, of course he is. That quiet depth beyond stabby fighty Lancer is so much worth exploring.

Roman: HE'S SO SWEET. HE'S SO GOOD AND SWEET. He tried so hard and desperately wanted to save the world, and even if he got his wish he willingly gave it up to save people, because no matter how he'd changed or what he became as a human his soul, his core, never stopped being someone who wanted to help. He gave everything he'd wanted up because he just...couldn't let go of his selflessness and he's so human, I just aaah.

Komadori: YOU MEAN MY OC OH MY GOD UH. I love how much she loves people, stories, everyone she meets she just loves them so so much and she's so loud and insistent and unapologetic in how much she adores everyone around her, how much she loves being around them. Every Servant, even the scary ones even the monsters even the Evil ones she loves them all so aggressively and stubbornly and LOUDLY that they can't help but love her back.

least favorite thing about them

Gil: Looks at UBW. Looks at Fate Route. Looks at Villain Gilgamesh. MMMMPH. Honey let's not.

Cu: Less about him and more god I'm so tired of how he's treated in some fan circles. But also I hate how little good screentime he gets in everything. My poor guy dies so fast.

Roman: I HATE THAT HE'S GONE SO MUCH. Also the 'he's really obtuse and kind of dumb and tone deaf and says stupid shit just to be bullied about it' running joke in the dialogue got old.

Komadori: Honey baby can we maybe perhaps NOT be so tied up in issues the thought of leaving Chaldea is the most terrifying thing on Earth, scarier even than ORT?

favorite line

Gil: It's really hard to pick just one because Tomokazu Seki goes the FUCK OFF in every appearance, but I think either his chant for Enuma Elish, or the way he fucking purrs his 4th Ascension and Bond 5 lines.

Cu: I can't remember the exact dialogue, but there's something he says to Emiya in UBW that slapped extremely hard. That and his dying fuck you to Kirei.

Romani: You're asking what you should be aiming for then? Haha, sounds like you alright, Komadori. That's a good question. That's an easy one. You don't want to stop the game, but finish the game instead. The end comes for both you and me. Accomplish lots by then. Whether it's joy or sadness, success or setbacks, as long as it's something new. You still have plenty of those, don't you? Live life with no regrets. I believe, above all else, that this is what it means to be moral for an individual-- and if you can do that, that would make me very proud.

Komadori: Sadly she's my OC who's a VN protagonist so she doesn't get much actual dialogue, but her speech in LB6 when she DOES extremely fucks hard.

brOTP

Gil: Cu and Emiya, absolutely. Three idiots having chaos disaster fun times together because they're all varying levels of stupid and overly competitive and secretly lonely.

Cu: See above, Emiya and Gil! Though I also love writing his best friends relationship with my Master OC Komadori. They're such good friends it makes me happy.

Romani: Da Vinci for absolute sure. They're adorable as friends, it's incredible, I love it.

Komadori: I have a list. Cu, Robin, Emiya, Merlin, Ushiwaka, Mordred, Mandri, Kintoki, Saito, Osakabe and Jinako, Sanson, Jalter, Drake, Enkidu, Grandpa Moriarty...

OTP

Gil: Gil and Enkidu, Gil and Hakuno (F) somewhat, Gil and Cu, Gil and my Master OC...

Cu: Either Cu and Gil or Cu and Robin Hood :)

Romani: Either him and my Master OC or him and Merlin. Or both! He has two hands.

Komadori: Gil, Roman, Dantes, Musashi, Oberon.

nOTP

Gil: Frankly, Koto*Gil, no thanks, I just don't like it at all.

Cu: While I don't HATE it, I just don't ship him with Emiya, but a REAL NOTP is Cu and Medb oh god no.

Roman: Man IDK what other ships does he even have? EDIT I HAVE BEEN TOLD SOME PEOPLE SHIP HIM WITH DAVID NO WHY

Komadori: I don't like shipping my Master OC with Mash @_@ that's her baby sister!

random headcanon

Gil: He's an absolute lightweight when it comes to hard liquor, as he's used to mainly drinking beer and wine.

Cu: His Riastrad/warp spasm turns him into a wolfman. He's just a werewolf. Fight me.

Roman: He is a frecklebeast, he burns like a shellfish in the sun, don't do that to him, he almost misses being unaffected :(

Komadori: She had a stuffed wolf before Chaldea that she probably brought with her, she loves it, its name is Little Cu.

unpopular opinion

Gil: I think this man should be allowed to be vulnerable and insecure sometimes as a treat.

Cu: I HATE the "lol Cu died so funny" running joke Fate does with him so much.

Roman: Uhhhhhh. Not sure lmao, everyone loves him?

Komadori: RIYO AND LEARNING WITH MANGA IS TERRIBLE AND I HATE IT

song i associate with them

Gil: Quite frankly, this is a good one; it reminds me of Uruk.

Cu: I gotta admit, this one is a good one to blast during him fighting.

Roman: It's not his POV, necessarily, but this song always makes me think of him

Komadori: This one is a fucking fantastic Lostbelt Arc song for her.

favorite picture of them

Gil: Not gonna paste the pics into the post because length, but this CE is one of my favorite things in the entire game.

Cu: Not gonna lie, everything Wada Arco has drawn of him fucks.

Romani: This one absolutely, it makes me cry.

Komadori: This image is one of my favorites I ascended the first time I saw it, but also this one too.

[livvyofthelake]

1, 4, 8, 18, 19 <333 a lot but I love the way you hate 🫂

1) the character everyone gets wrong

i already said arthur but since you didn’t specify a fandom i will use this space to complain about the shadowhunter chronicles <3 nobody on earth understands my girl isabelle lightwood it’s sick and twisted. i can’t even think about how bad the tv show fumbled her it makes me so angry i want to start screaming. like. congratulations everyone you fell for the femme fatale front she was putting up… even the people who were supposed to be writing her and understanding her character it’s ridiculous like none of that is what cassie wrote and i read…

4) what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?

again i already answered this but one time i blocked someone because their icon looked really weird and they spam liked and it freaked me out seeing their icon so much. me when i’m so normal and nice i guess.

8) common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

WHEN BBC MERLIN FANS. actually i could finish this answer right there couldn’t i… no i’ll finish for real. when bbc merlin fans are like ohhhh why did the show do (insert widely known story beat from centuries of legends) like girl it was ALWAYS going to happen that way that’s the point….. mordred was always going to turn on arthur, morgana was always going to become evil, etc. yes there are issues with HOW the show did that stuff (meaning they did it in such stupid ways it’s laughable) but that’s the story… it’s BEEN set come on…

18) it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

can i say that i think all fandoms (on tumblr) really sleep on straight ships or is that an insane thing to say. like sometimes i don’t care if that man was homoerotic with his pal and it’s insane that you care more about that than his awesomely written relationship with his girlfriend/ex fiancée/some kind of love interest. ok this is about izombie this is about liv and major. i don’t care about major and ravi!!!!!!! major and liv are literally endgame grow up!!!! but no this is also true for every fandom ever. the way people ignore a man’s canonical female love interest if he has even one ounce of gay tension with some other dude in the show is ridiculous idk

19) you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

i guess i’m supposed to say ben barnes shadow and bone here or whatever. but i’m not actually mad about it because i’m a born apologist and knew this would happen. but i feel like i’m supposed to not like him. or i’m supposed to like him but righteous fandom people think it’s activism to not like him and therefore they would hate me sooo much because i formulate my own opinions with nuance and depth or whatever. also rumplestiltskin once upon a time. robert carlyle you got to me man… i could write essay length posts about that character actually don’t get me started. also i finished this question, saved the draft, and then another ask reminded me of the wilds, so i should also add that in hindsight i’m very embarrassed about the way i acted about the wilds season 2…. like i can’t believe you all let me act like that about men. in the feminist lord of the flies show…. why was i allowed to do that seriously that was sick….

[lonesomedotmp3]

top five morgana apologism moments… alternatively top five merlin anti hero moments

they are both my favourite little war criminals so i'll do both <3

can i just say the entirety of the tears of uther pendragon... she was literally right to do all of that and she looked good doing it... SPECIFICALLY the scene where she just hugged uther and we see the first evil little smirk... slay babygirl!!!

ACTUALLY in part two when she had that whole conversation with merlin and she was like there is no other way... this was always going to happen! she's the dragon! she's the bad guy in this play!!! she's got the script and the casting fits so she'll play her part... ok i'll stop quoting random shit now but literally conversations of all time she should've put that man's head on a spike and burned that whole place to the ground

when she tried to stab uther with the knife arthur gave her. um imagine finding out uther doesn't even have the common morality the basic traditional etiquette he pretends to maintain even as he apathetically genocides a group of people even as he made YOU hate yourself. actually he never respected your father as he told (LIED) to you he never ever will respect you as anything other than a bastard and a mistake. yeah you'd fucking kill him. of course you would.

idk exactly what we're counting as an apologism moment but something that makes ME forgive everything she has ever done ever is when she grabs merlin's wrist frantic and terrified and so so tired and he just. silently brushes her off and walks away. i mean fucking top merlin anti hero moment as well. unbearably fucked up. what's something else violent she could do. she should've gouged his eyes out and left him in the wilderness to starve. yeah

one of the only two good things in the lancelot du lac episode when she revives him but he's only a shade of his former self completely reliant on another and while he'll maintain relationships with the others they don't mean anything because they don't love him they love who he used to be. and he lives only to ruin his reputation forever when he would've been better off to everyone dead and gone. functionally dead, living past his myth, came back wrong, etc. he's only a weapon. and she just looks at him for a long long time knowing exactly what he is and what will happen. yeah 😐

oh this getting so long merlin anti-hero lightning round

getting rid of arthur's free will - i STILL cannot believe he did that

killing the magical being that told him how to save gwen in s5 for like no reason

him being just soooo mean to my buddy mordred :( the shrug. the shrug!! i literally have that gif saved on my phone just to look at sometimes. he's like if a dark gaping void were a boy who was a girl who was more like wet cement. you understand

POISONING MORGANA. WHATEVER I DON'T EVEN CARE 😐😐😐

killing agravaine and all his men and then turning around and constructing the sword in the stone myth for arthur in the same episode. because kings were not meant to drag their hems in this sort of filth. killing myself. ruining the whole story and taking control of the narrative for the worse because you loved not wisely but too well. KILLING MYSELF. that was such a fun agonised jaunt through memory lane thank u beth :)

[springs-hurts]

Seriously that's all i want🥲 like why tf people like to ignore Arthur and Mordred? I get you want him to have good relationship with Merlin but Mordred. Had. Good. Relationship. WITH ARTHUR???? Did you not see the way Arthur said Mordred would be his best??? The way he picked him up? The way he was contemplating bringing magic back, to save Mordred? Like please give me some good fics I beg y'all 😭😭

Arthur and Mordred friendship is very underutilized in fics. I’m not surprised half the fandom hates him for killing Arthur and the other half want to see Merlin and morderd have a good relationship but still. Their few episodes of friendship were adorable and it makes me sad people don’t write it into fics.

[weakforarwen]

Thinking about how Morgana directly or indirectly killed all of Gwen's family.

Uther sentenced Tom to die but any hopes of proving his innocence and saving him were shattered when Morgana helped him break out of his cell. It was Tom's choice to try to escape, and I can't fault him or Morgana for their choices, but Morgana's good intentions expedited Tom's death, something I hadn't even noticed until it was pointed out by @groundbreakingdot872 in a post.

Elyan obviously died because of Morgana. Either him or Arthur were meant to die by the magical sword in the room with Gwen and Elyan got to Gwen first (for some reason it took Arthur ages to reach them when he hadn't been far behind Elyan...)

Arthur, Gwen's remaining family, died because of Morgana too, by Mordred's hand but with her enchanted blade.

It's insane to me how Gwen suffered more at Morgana's hands than Arthur did. I blame that first and foremost on the writers' racism and misogyny, but it's also a reflection of the kind of person Morgana became - someone who thought herself better than a mere servant without any magic.

It's also worth remembering everything Gwen had to face and endure to be with Arthur, all that she risked and sacrificed for him:

Even before Morgana, Gwen risked her life being loved by Arthur. She knew how Uther would react if he learned of her and Arthur. She had already been sentenced to die once, yet it wasn't Uther's wrath she feared; she feared coming between Uther and Arthur and weakening Camelot, because Arthur had to be King and she wasn't Queen material (or so she thought). She feared that Arthur wouldn't be able to choose her and she feared that he would.

When Morgana found out about Gwen and Arthur, she had Elyan and Gwen kidnapped. Gwen didn't learn of Morgana's involvement (she probably guessed eventually), but despite Merlin's words to her, she knew she'd been targeted for her relationship with Arthur. Her life, and her brother's life, were threatened but she didn't think for one second to blame Arthur or reassess their relationship. If anything, she became more certain of her and Arthur's future.

In 3.10, Gwen was again sentenced to die but she only thought of Arthur. She worried about how he would cope after her death. She also told Arthur he should never abandon Camelot for her. She put him, his future, and the future of Camelot, above herself.

Uther sentenced Gwen to die twice, tried to banish her, slapped her, killed her father, showed time and time again he thought her life was worthless, and still she took care of him. For Arthur. Her love for Arthur and her compassionate nature, who pitied Uther despite everything he'd done, was stronger than any hatred and resentment she harbored for the King. She was stronger than fear or hatred - she never let it consume her.

Gwen asked Lancelot to protect Arthur when she knew he planned to risk his life for them all. It mustn't have been easy to ask a man who perhaps still had feelings for her to protect the man she loved with his life. It was a Knight's duty to protect and give his life for their King but Gwen still specifically asked Lancelot to bring Arthur home. She believed Lancelot had died keeping his promise to her and she lived with that guilt. No matter what happened, she never reconsidered her relationship with Arthur, thought it would have been much easier to date a normal man.

She told Arthur not to look for Merlin in 4.06 and was grateful that Mordred was hurt instead of Arthur in 5.05. Gwen loved Merlin and didn't wish any harm on Mordred, but she loved Arthur to the point where she would risk anything and anyone for Arthur.

Gwen endured Agravaine's disapproval and likely the disapproval of many others who didn't wish for a servant to become Queen. She must've had her doubts and insecurities but she never showed them, because she wanted to marry Arthur and to support him.

Arthur banished Gwen but she still risked her life returning to Camelot to warn him of Morgana's plans and Agravaine's betrayal. She nearly died for it too.

She sentenced a young girl to death to flush out her father just to protect Arthur. That wasn't an easy decision for Gwen to make and she had truly cared for Sefa.

Elyan died and Gwen's agency was stolen from her - she murdered an innocent man and nearly killed her husband while not herself - because Morgana hated she was Queen and wanted to kill Arthur. But did she ever blame Arthur or resent all she'd been through and lost to be with him? Nope. Never. Not even a little.

Gwen also risked her life in the finale by accompanying Arthur to the battlefield and that wasn't the first time she fought for Camelot and for Arthur (4.13) despite not being a trained fighter.

All of that was already a lot and she never even learned of Agravaine's attempt on her life in 4.02. Gwen was completely devoted to Arthur and risked everything to be with him and to protect him. Still, the fandom doesn't seem to appreciate all she did because they believe she loved Lancelot more than Arthur, or because Merlin did more for Arthur or whatever.