#mom is very stubborn so the fact that she is trying to move away from the nickname i hate actually means a lit

[naomiknight-17]

At the funeral and reception today, Mom told me "I'm going to introduce you today as (legal name), ok? I'm going to try"

I had said before that it was okay to call me either my legal name or Tam, but NOT the nickname I grew up with (which is what Mom always calls me and refers to me as)

And you know what? She did try. And she did introduce me as my legal name and not as my old nickname in every interaction which called for it

And I do appreciate that

[goldsbitch]

You texted...

Y/N and Lando are going through a rough patch in their relationship. Not really on speaking terms. This bad streak ends when there is a massive spider in her bathroom.

angst, one shot

The moment she spotted that creature sent from hell, everything else went out of the window. The dinner in the oven, the fact she was planning on doing a late night session in the gym, the fact her hair was still wet from the shower. The fact she and her boyfriend Lando were on "not speaking" terms.

Y/N was absolutely terrified of spiders her whole life and was never able to over come the fear by getting rid of them on her own. Lando was the one who always ever so kindly rescued her, he overtook this role her neighbor, who overtook it from her mom, who Y/N had trained to react immediately when she heard a very specific scream.

Now she was standing in her apartment, alone with nowhere to go, since her job was to stay frozen at one spot and stare at the creature, in case it moved, and not really sure who to call for help. Her best friend was the first option. Normally, it would have been her boyfriend, but something was stopping her from doing that.

"Come on, come on, come on," she whispered as she dialed her best friend living close by. "Pick up, dammit."

Finally, the tone she was praying for. "Hey, girl, what's up?"

No time for chit chat. "You have to come over now, immediately."

Her friend noticed the immediate distress and tuned herself in. "What's wrong?" she replied, sounding as she was ready to dial the police.

"There's a spider situation going on in my apartment."

"Uhm, I see," she said, more relaxed now, but still taking it seriously.

"It's huge, with like hairy legs and shit. You have to come over, now. We have a deal, remember?"

Her friend was equally terrified of mosquitoes, so they agreed that Y/N would deal with those while spider duty fell on the other lady. This has happened many many times before. Usually ended up with a nice girls evening. Ever since Lando appeared in Y/N life however, the emergency calls stopped.

"I thought Lando was around this week?" her friend asked curiously. "Not that I'm trying to get out of this, but I'm sort of like an hour away from you, so..."

Y/N let out a frustrated sigh. "Fucking hell...Yeah, we're not exactly speaking at the moment," she admitted.

"Wow, that's a first!?" her friend said, clearly surprised. "Why?"

"Look, I'd love to chat, but are you coming or not? There's no one else and I'm not calling Lando!"

"Yes, yes, I'm getting in the car, just let me say good bye to my friends here, we're having a picnic," she replied and muted voices of disapproval came from the background.

Y/N felt guilty about doing this, but she'd dropped everything she was oing for her friend many times, answered phone calls in the middle of the night even though she was an early bird. They just had this kind of friendship.

"Drive fast, please," she said, still stubborn and not about to call Lando.

//

Y/N sat there staring at the spider for good ten minuted before her friend called again.

"Ok, I'm in the car, you can talk about Lando now, keep me busy. I'm going to pass over the fact you and your boyfriend are fighting and I have no idea," she said unapologetically.

"Figured you'd be mad about that. Yeah, he's been acting like a bit of a dick..."

"But you're not broken up, right?" her friend asked, slightly worried about her favorite couple.

"No, I don't think so. I hope so," she realized, the spider in the corner becoming lesser of her problems.

"And what seems to be the problem? Did he cheat?"

"No, not that I'm aware," she replied without thinking.

"Did you cheat?" her friend asked, ready to support her in anything.

"Jesus, no. It's um...I dunno, we've just grown a bit distant. Lately it feels like I'm like at number 50 of his priorities list. It's always only racing, Quadrant, promo event this and that."

"That's shitty, yeah. Would you like to be included? I know you hate things like promo events and such."

"I do! But honestly, I miss him so much and frankly I'd like to be more included in his life somehow. Especially now that I have more time in my life."

"Does he know that?"

"No?"

Her friend let out a deep sigh. "Hm. You have to untangle that. It would be stupid to break up over that."

"Yeah, I'd hate that," she said, panic setting in.

"Text him to come. To save you from the spider. It's a nice excuse and good test. To see if he cares."

"I'm scared. What if he does not respond?"

Few moments of dramatic silence. "Well, at least you'd know."

"Yeah. Ok. Sending it." Y/N quickly typed something up, trying not to overthink it.

"What did you text?"

"Can you come over asap? I need help with a spider. It's urgent."

"Nice. Now you'll see what he does."

They stayed on the phone together for good half an hour. Catching up and distracting Y/N from the fact there was no text from Lando coming her way.

//

A doorbell rang.

"You're here already?" Y/N asked her friend, surprised by her ability to drive this fast.

"Nope, still very much far away. Did I hear a bell? Do you think it's him?"

"I dunno. I'll mute you and if it's him I'll hang up, ok?"

"Gotcha."

She opened the door with a heavy heart. What if it was not him?

But it was. Flustered Lando stood there without saying hello. The two shared a pain-filled look, neither of them enjoying this no contact streak they had.

"You came..." she said finally, ending the phone call.

"You texted..." he said dryly and in full macho mode entered her apartment without being let it. "Can you point me where?"

"That corner," she simply pointed, flushed with emotions. Happy that he came to rescue her, sad about his loveless tone and scared of what was to come after. She watched him from afar, as he skillfully took the spider and threw it out of the balcony.

"Don't say anything about him knowing his way back, please," he said, hinting on the countless debates they'd had before about Lando not wanting to kill every spider they'd encounter.

The air suddenly went very heavy. Lando casually headed to the kitchen to get himself a glass of water while trying so hard to make eye contact with her. The last time they spoke was few days prior - and it was not a nice conversation. Lots of built up emotions got out, frustrated speeches made and confusing sentences jumping one after another. Ending with Lando slamming the door on his way out.

She had no clue where to start. "So, how have you been?" she asked, not sure she was ready for his answer. He finally looked at her, and then with an annoyed eye-roll went back into staring out of the window.

Y/N threw her hands up in the air as the familiar feeling from few days ago kicked back in. "Ok fine, sorry I asked. Thank you so much for your help, truly appreciated, but if you hate being around me, just say so that we can-"

"We can what?" he cut her off, not having any of that.

"I don't know, you tell me!...I'm getting lost at trying to read you," she admitted, not even trying to hide anything from him at this point.

"I'm sorry," he said slowly. "I don't think I listened to you," he sighed before continuing, "Or more like did not hear what you were saying."

The validation felt rewarding. But she feared what would come next.

"What I heard at that moment was you not respecting my lack of time and the fact that things I'm involved in are important to me."

She took a breath and planned on interrupting him, which he noticed and tried to stop.

"Let me finish, please. But thinking about it, I figured that's not the case, and you were simply pointing out that I've been putting off spending time with you. Which you're absolutely correct. I figured since we've been going to strong lately, this would be fine. But truth is I hate this distance it created. I feel lost, uneasy and unable to focus," he blabbered something, which felt like he might have even rehearsed on the way to her. "What I'm trying to say is - do you still care enough for us to fix it?"

It felt vulnerable, raw and maybe even uncomfortable to have these kinds of talks. But this is ultimately what cements a relationship.

Feeling like he managed to destroy some of the wall they'd put up, she took few steps towards him.

"Lando, of course I do. It's not a rare event that I imagine our future life together, as a couple and one day potentially as a family. Never had this feeling before in my life. Please, let's figure out a way how to prevent the distance from happening. Things have changed now, the relationship has too. We've been together for almost two years. And my love for you has only grown."

He finally smiled, relieved that they seemed to be on the same page.

"I came right from the tennis court, left everyone behind. Would you like to go there with me? Hang out with the Quadrant squad for a bit and then have a nice dinner somewhere? I just want to spend this evening with you."

"And the night hopefully," she teased, trying to ease the mood.

"Always the night, it was absolutely horrible, knowing you're so close to me, yet having to sleep without you."

She closed the distance between them, embracing him into a hug. They bodies were more than familiar with each and it felt right to be that close. Definitely better than each of them standing in a different corner of the room.

"We still have to talk about this. I don't want our love to slip through by our fingers," she said, letting her anxiety out.

"We will. Tonight, we'll come up with a plan. Can you join me on few races later this month?" he asked, hoping for a positive answer.

"Of course, my love. I have to buy new clothes though, the cameras are savage."

He chuckled, relaxed now that he did not have to worry about having lost her. "Yes, they are."

She later call her friend to thank her for dropping everything and driving to save her, even though it was not needed in the end. Her friend was more than happy that she and Lando seemingly found the way back to each other.

She also admitted that she turned back the moment Y/N sent her text to Lando, knowing that this guy would come running anytime his girlfriend asked for help.

[acesandocs]

Before I post the short story I've been working on, I wanted to introduce some of Ace’s family, since they're going to be featured. I tried to edit it down to the important stuff but if anyone wants to know more just ask.

Solveig Liv Årud/Sylvia Hall, Ace's Mother

Ace's mom Solveig was born in Kapp along with her two brothers, One of her neighbors was a music teacher and taught her to play the Hardanger fiddle. When she was seventeen she became pregnant by one of her neighbor's students but was urged by her neighbor to never tell him or anyone else of the child's parentage. Having had Ace outside of wedlock Solveig faced a lot of social ostracisation. Her sister in law, who was deeply religious judged Solveig for having a child without marrying. A rumor amongst the townspeople was that Ace's father was actually a fossegrim, that Solveig agreed to have a child with in exchange for teaching her to play the fiddle so well. (there is actually a lot to say on how this affected Ace and his view of himself but we don't have time to get into it rn). After a flood made her and her family homeless they emigrated to America in 1920 at the advice of some friends.

Once they arrived in New York Ace became very ill and bedridden causing them to be left behind as the rest of their family continued further up to Minnesota. While Ace was sick Solveig met and later fell in love with a Swedish immigrant named Eric Hall. She married Eric after knowing him for half a year. Solveig had kept Ace close all her life and not really letting her grow up or stand on her own. So he reacted badly to Solveig marrying. Being jealous and being unable to deal with not being her mothers center of attention, making him lash out. After an argument where Solveig slapped Ace for being disrespectful to her stepfather Ace ran away from home. Ace and Solveig have been estranged ever since, both being too stubborn to try to reconcile. After Solveig married Eric she tried very hard to adapt to American culture, Americanizing her name to Sylvia and trying her best to learn English and not speak with an accent. She currently has two children with Eric. Neither them nor Ace know of each other's existence.

Torbjørn Olaug Årud and Lena Årud, Ace's Grandparents

Lena was born in Kapp and Torbjørn was born in the Lofoten area. He traveled down to Toten to live with a family friend after he became orphaned. He later met Lena and they eventually married. They later had 2 sons, the youngest of them dying after moving away as an adult, later they had a daughter they named Solveig. When Solveig became pregnant at seventeen they decided to support her and help her take care of their granddaughter. In the years immediately after Ace was born she and Solveig lived with them before moving into a smaller house on their property. By this time their oldest had married and taken over the main house on the farm and Torbjørn and Lena moved into another small house on the property.

They emigrated to America with the rest of their family in 1920 and went with the rest to Minnesota leaving Solveig and Ace behind. Lena later died in 1922 after becoming sick. Ace does not know this happened.

Info on the art:

Ace is supposed to be a tortoiseshell cat, witch is something that can be seen in her mother and grandmother as well. this is a reference to the fact that tortoiseshells are mostly female. (source)

Her grandfather is supposed to be a Norwegian forest cat.

The implement Solveig is holding is called a Lyster and it is used to fish. Lyster fishing was usually done when it was dark out, using the Lyster to stab the fish. it was banned in the 1860 but was most likely still practiced afterwards. Today it has become completely illegal. The fish in the bucket are trout, a fish that was commonly caught with a Lyster. (source) Here is a painting depicting it.

I apologize for any spelling mistakes or weird wording, i try my best to read though these before i post them but some mistakes often slip through.

[ssuperficialspacecadett]

The Sunshine State

Chapter One of the Through the Scope series | Chapter Two

Rating: Mature

Word Count: 4K

TW: Mentions of sexual assault in readers past, mentions of drug (cocaine) use

Chapter Overview: You're desperately looking for a job when one falls right into your lap.

Notes: I have decided to try my hand at writing for Frankie (: He is my favorite Pedro character after all. I don't have a posting schedule, so chapters will be coming at you sporadically. I apologize in advance for that (uni is outrageously time consuming). I hope this first chapter gets your interest peaked for whats to come ! Happy reading <3

*No use of y/n & female presenting reader*

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

The serene music that is emitting from the coffee shop speakers is doing nothing for your nerves. Maybe that is due to the fact that you were on your third cup of coffee in two hours or maybe it is that you have already been in Florida for a week and still haven’t found a job. You blow a strand of hair out of your face and continue staring at the seemingly endless job applications on your computer. You find yourself cursing under your breath for the thousandth time that day. Why couldn’t you find a job you liked? When the words on your screen start to blur together, you lean back in your chair and let out a heavy sigh. You need to remember why you were here in the first place: your dads recovery. 

After your mom died a few years ago, dad decided to move into a retirement home. He realized how hollow the ranch house was without her life enhancing presence and opted to venture to Florida. You were cross with him for up and abandoning you, but you tried your hardest not to let your resentment show. Her death hit him the hardest. He seemed to be doing well whenever you visited him over the holidays. Unfortunately, it was an illusion. You mom’s constant nagging at him to stay on top of his diabetes died with her. 

As soon as you got the call you were on the next plane to Florida. He had suffered a stroke that left his walking impaired. The two of you fought back and forth about your being there. He didn’t want you to have uprooted your life back in Texas, but it wasn’t up for debate. Hair and eye color weren’t the only shared traits between y’all, stubbornness was just as deeply ingrained in your DNA as it was in his. An agreement was reached between you after a tear filled argument. You would reside in Florida for six months, the amount of time when the most progress is made for stroke patients, and then leave. Unable to live in his retirement home, you found a cheap apartment the next day. 

You drain the last bit of coffee from your cup and close your laptop. As much as you dreaded going back to your empty apartment, you couldn’t stay here any longer. You place your laptop back in its case and slip it into your tote bag. The buzzing of your phone snaps your attention back to the table.

“Hey Robbie!”

“Hey! How’s the sunshine state treating you?”

You let out a low groan. Robin, or Robbie as you lovingly dubbed her, was your best friend and roommate back home. You had very little emotional connection to your home state, but Robbie was your life line. She was there for you when your mom died and then when your father subsequently left. You didn’t know how she managed to be so attentive to you and juggle law school at the same time. You owed her a debt you could never repay.

Your attention gets pulled away from the call when a group of women sitting in the corner of the coffee shop start laughing and talking loudly together. For a brief moment you try to picture yourself sitting and laughing along with them. Robbie, the ever logical one, pulls you from your delusion. 

“Are you still there?”

“Fuck. I’m sorry. God, it's so lonely here without friends. Don’t get me wrong I love spending time with my dad, but when I’m done visiting with him I just come home to an empty, barely furnished apartment.”

“I told you that I would come visit you over my spring break.”

“I know, but that's over two months away.”

“Why don’t you spend your free time looking for a man? Maybe you will have better luck there than back home.”

“I don’t have time!,” you counter. “I have been here a week and I still haven’t found a new job. How am I supposed to pay rent, furnish my apartment, or even feed myself if I don't have a job? My savings is only going to last so long. Besides, all the men that I have interacted with so far are practically geriatric.”

“You always did like em’ older.”

The two of you talk for a little while longer. She manages to pick your spirits up despite her teasing you. She lets you know that she has to run because one of her lectures is starting soon, but she promises to call you back later this week.

You stand up and place your phone in your back pocket. You easily slip your tote onto your shoulder and gather up the empty cups you collected over your time in the shop. While you walk to the trash a bright orange flier pinned to the corkboard above it catches your eyes.  

HELP WANTED

Receptionist for Brass Knuckles Boxing Gym

432 Peach Dr, Jacksonville, FL 32246

Contact Ben Miller at (904) XXX-XXXX

Starting pay: $20.00

Honestly, you ponder, you have nothing to lose. Beggars can’t be choosers. Plus you recognize that street. It wasn’t a far drive from where you are now which means that it’s close to your apartment. The pay was higher than minimum wage and being a receptionist couldn’t be that hard. You toss your trash into the bin and pull out your phone to dial the number. The ringing of the phone next to your ear muffles the sounds of the still laughing group of women as you exit the coffee shop. 

“Brass Knuckles, this is Benny speaking.”

The subtle southern accent that comes through your speaker washes a wave of calmness over you. Maybe you did have some attachment to back home.

“Hi,” you introduce yourself to him. “I saw your flier for needing a receptionist at your gym. I was wondering if you were still hiring?”

“We are! Would you like to come in and tour the place right now?”

You take a peek at the time displayed on your phone. 3:15 P.M. You should have enough time to check it out and then head to your dad’s before the after work traffic rush.

“Actually that would be great.”

“Perfect. I’ll see you soon then!”

***

The gym was a stand alone building constructed of rough looking red brick. It had large windows that allowed you to see some of the equipment and, more importantly, the front desk. You hop out of your car and check both ways before crossing the parking lot. As you turn your head from right to left you see a bar across the street. The rickety, wooden sign on the building has a shotgun painted onto it and the bar’s name, The Barrel, is appropriately painted onto the barrel of the gun. At least you know where to go to get a drink now if you don’t get this job. You take a deep breath and swing open the glass door to the gym. 

A sharp ring of the door’s bell and the potent aroma of sweat and cheap men’s body spray are the first things that greet you as you enter the building. You swear that if you get this job, fixing the odor in this place will be one of the first orders of business you carry out. You look over at the front desk as you wait for Benny. It is positioned to sit squarely in the middle of the lobby. There is a brick wall, the same type as the outside, directly behind it. The back wall only extends as far as the desk does. This makes for two entrances into the gym. One on the right and one on the left of the desk. 

“You made it! Thanks for comin’!”

You shift your gaze from the white blocked lettering on the brick wall that reads “Brass Knuckles Boxing Gym” to where the voice rang out from. You're stunned when a man rounds the corner shirtless and out of breath. Good fucking god he’s toned. He smiles boyishly at you and pushes his grown out, sandy hair back. He turns his head to see what caught your eye.

“You like the new sign? I paid someone to paint it on the brick a few weeks ago. It looked so empty before.”

“Y-yeah, it's lovely.” 

“See?!,” he throws his hands up exasperatedly. “The guys said it was stupi-that’s not important now. Anyway it’s good to meet you in person. Wanna start the tour?”

You nod at him and he waves at you to follow him back into the gym. He points out each of the stations he has set up. 

“We have machines for your legs here. Then in that corner are machines for your upper body and core. Our heavy bags are kept in this area. I also have some weight benches set up over there for people to use on lighter workout days.” 

You’re trying to soak up everything that he is saying, but to be honest, most of the machines look the same to you. He takes you to view the showers, the laundry room, and to his back office.

“When I’m not training with a client I’ll usually either be here in my office or in there with a heavy bag on a stand.” He points behind you.

The center of the gym holds its crown jewel: the boxing ring itself. The walls of it are made from a red, tarp like material and the center of the ring is a deep shade of blue. Poles, wrapped in white padding, protrude from each of the four corners and four rows of thickly braided, white rope encase the entire thing. 

“I’ve never actually been in one of these before to be honest.” you laugh. “I’ve only ever seen them on T.V. when I’m channel surfing and land on WWE.” 

“No way,” he looks genuinely shocked.

“Yes way.” you shrug apologetically. 

“Being in there is electric, man. Gotta be one of the best feelings in the world hands down.” 

You feel at ease talking with him. He seems really passionate about what he does and all that goes into it. You give the gym another once over and then it dawns on you; it’s a ghost town. 

“Hey, where is everybody?”

“It’s usually pretty slow around this time of the afternoon. Our busiest times during the week are when people come in here around 12:00 P.M. to burn off steam during their lunch breaks and then after 5:00 P.M. when work gets out. Saturdays are packed most of the time because we aren’t open on sundays.

“Ahh.”

“But all hell breaks loose when we have our famous Friday Fight Nights!,” he nudges you in the ribs. “There isn’t a free seat in the whole damn house! People screamin’, beer sloshin’, bets bein’ made. It’s my bread and butter.”

“That sounds insane, Benny.”

“You mean you have never heard of it before?”

“I moved here a week ago actually. I’m sure I would have heard of it if I had just been here longer!”

“Alright, you get a pass. What made you choose Florida to call home?”

You normally don’t like telling people your personal business so soon after meeting them, but Benny has a trustworthiness about him that you can’t ignore. Maybe making friends would be easier than you thought.

“I moved here to help my Dad actually. He’s having some medical issues and I want to be here to help him work through them. I figure that I’ll be here for maybe six months? I’m not sure if that would work for you though. That’s kinda the reason I’ve been struggling to find a job.”

He looks at you with genuine understanding.

“If six months is all you can give me then I’ll take it.”

“Wait? I got the job?”

“It’s perfect if you think about it. You need a job and I need a receptionist ASAP. If you want, since you’re new and all, I could be your tour guide. Born and raised here.”

A weight seems to immediately lift off your shoulders. If he wasn’t such a sweaty mess you would have given him the biggest hug.

“Okay, great!”

He claps his hands together. “Drinks on Santi tonight!”

“Santi?”

“He’s one of my older brothers and I’s friends. He bet that I couldn’t get a receptionist within a week of the last one leaving and you just helped me prove him wrong.” 

“I’m happy to help. Do you mind if I ask why your last receptionist left?”

That wipes the giddy look off his face.

“Well,” he scratches the back of his head. “She ended up leaving because she said some of the patrons were a bit too forward. I asked her to tell me which ones so I could ban ‘em, but she wouldn’t give ‘em up. I totally get it if that changes your mind about taking the job.”

Your throat goes dry as an icy tingling sensation makes itself known on your skin. Fuzzy images of unwelcomed hands being a bit too forward as you lay on the couch. The smell of tequila burning your nose as he whispers to you. Clinging to the sounds of the movie he put on in the background to distract you.

“You alright?”

“Yes!,” you rush out too quickly for him to believe. “I’m fine. I just zoned out for a second there. I’m sure I’ll be fine. Plus I promise that I will tell you if anyone tries anything.”

He seems satisfied with your answer and walks back up to the front desk with you.

“You want to come get drinks with me and the guys tonight? It’s going to be me, which you already know, my brother Will, Santi, and Frankie. We usually go to The Barrel. You would be the guest of honor.”

“I’m flattered, but,” you look at the time on your phone. “I should head out before traffic gets bad.”

“Next time, next time. You already have my number so just text me and I’ll let you know what time you can come in on Monday. Don’t worry about the rest of this week. I can hold it down until you officially start.”

***

“Dad, I needed a job and I found one. What's the issue?”

He puts his hand up to let you know he is catching his breath. You sit in a chair next to him while he rests in between his physical therapy. The exercises mainly consisted of his physical therapist, Maggie, working the muscles in his legs. Even still, they took a lot out of him. He was still a ways away from standing or walking on his own. 

“The issue is that you’re going to be the only woman in a place full of men on steroids. I don’t like that.”

“God, that's such a you thing to say,” you argue. “I’m not a little girl anymore. It’s also not a male only gym, dad. A lot of women work out and take boxing classes too. The manager, Benny, seems really nice. He was the one I met with earlier today.”

You watch as he opens his mouth to presumably hurl a retort your way, but he stops himself. Your heart breaks as he sighs and turns away from you. He hasn’t been himself since the stroke. You know that you can’t even begin to understand what he is going through, yet you’re trying. The anger he is feeling isn’t directed at you, but it still hurts nonetheless. He is a proud man at heart, so all of this attention and fretting over him must be weighing heavy. You extend your hand and place it softly on top of his. Although he is still looking away from you, his brows unfurrow and his lips fall from the tight line he held them in.

“I’ll be fine. I promise. I told you that I would be here with you for your recovery and that's what I intend to do. This isn’t a little issue, dad.”

He turns to look at you again, eyes glossy from fighting back tears. “I know, I just-I just feel like a damn burden.”

“You aren’t,” you squeeze his hand. “Everyone needs help sometimes and now it's your turn. You took care of me my whole life. The very least I could do is be by your side right now.”

A soft knock on his room door pulls the two of you out of your conversation.

“Hi, hon. I don’t mean to interrupt, but I need to finish Greg’s session.”

“That’s fine, Maggie. I was about to head about anyway.”

You stand up from your chair and give him a hug before you collect your purse. He reminds you that he has his poker tournaments on Sundays, so you didn’t have to come in to see him then. Getting ditched for a deck of cards and a bunch of old dudes. That’s gotta be a new low. You wave at Maggie as you pass her while heading to the door.

“Hey, sweet pea?”

You turn around to a name that you have been called since before you can even remember.

“I’m glad you’re here.”

“Me too.”

***

The Barrel is unsurprisingly empty on a Thursday night. Benny, Frankie, Will, and Santi all sit at their usual table in the back corner of the bar. The small army of empty beer bottles huddled in the middle of their table makes up for the lack of local patrons in the building.

“She seems really great. Even complimented the way ‘Brass Knuckles Boxing Gym’ looked painted onto the brick. I told y’all it wasn’t stupid. It also doesn’t hurt that she's beautiful, man.” 

Santi lets out a low whistle before tipping his still half full beer in Benny’s direction. “I’ll drink to that.”

“I don't think you're going to be able to break this one man. She’s got a lot on her plate so the last thing she needs is a piece of shit like you comin’ in and adding more trouble.”

Will and Frankie snicker at Santi’s face that shows faux offense to what Benny just said.

“I enrich the life of every woman I meet. No one has ever left my bed unsatisfied.”

“A lot on her plate?” Will chimes in to direct the conversation into a more appropriate one. “What does that mean?”

Frankie nods his hat in the direction of Will signaling that he is thinking the same thing about you as well.

“Yeah. She was talking about how she moved down here to help her dad. Said he had an accident or somethin’.” 

“Think she will be able to boost Friday ticket sales?”

“For the love of God, Pope,” Will laughs and shoves the man sitting next to him. “Can you get your mind out of the gutter for two fuckin’ seconds?”

“No, he’s onto something, Will,” The other three men can see a plan unfolding in the reflection of Benny’s eyes. “If I can get her to double as my ring girl for the fights we would be swimming in it boys.”

Benny tells them that he had invited you to come celebrate with them, but you had plans already. The more he talked the more curious the group was to meet you. 

“Why don’t you let Fish get a word in, huh?” Santi interrupts. 

Benny puts his hands up in surrender and turns to the man sitting beside him at the table. Frankie had been quiet since they closed up the gym for the night and headed to the bar.

“What’s wrong, Fish? Cat got your tongue?” Benny jokes.

“Fuck off, man.” 

“Yeah, what’s up? We are celebrating tonight.” Santi adds.

Frankie downs the last of his beer. It isn’t cold anymore due to the fact that he had it in an iron grip.

“Rochelle texted me,” a unified hush fell over the table of four. “She said she wants to get back together. That she wants to ‘make it work’ this time.”

Benny is the first to break the silence.

“Rochelle? God I hate that woman and I’ve never hated a woman in my fuckin’ life.”

“Shut up, Benny,” Will grumbles in the direction of his younger brother. “What are you going to do, Fish?”

“I don’t know. I miss her. I just- she’s just- I don’t want to relapse.”

Another silence envelops the men. Each and everyone of them knew what he meant. After Frankie got out of his last tour he fell into the arms of the first woman that came along. They all knew she wasn’t the one for him, but he hadn’t been happy in such a long time so they let it slide for as long as they could. Then the coke came into the picture. Benny tried, Santi tried, and Will tried to get him to cut her off. He was spiraling and didn’t even realize it. When he was on coke he didn’t remember all of the horrible things that he did and that he saw. It felt like he was on top of the world, until he fell right into the unforgiving ground of reality. 

He failed a routine drug test at work. They fired him right on the spot and put his pilot's license under review. Ironically flying was the only thing that kept him grounded. Now that he didn’t have it the guys knew they had to help him. They managed to convince him to cut Rochelle out of his life. Then they urged him to check into a rehab, even if it was a temporary one. Once he got out, he found a job at an auto body shop. It wasn’t aviation, but it was a start. He had been clean ever since. Seven months to be exact. But even the sight of seeing her name light up his phone screen made his body ache for a fix.

“We didn’t let you drown the first time, Fish. We won’t let you drown this time.”

Will’s words hit him like a ton of bricks. He knows it's true. They never once gave up on him through the entire thing. The only thing Frankie can do is tip his worn, black cap in Will’s direction. Benny lovingly claps him on the back and then the conversation is put to bed. 

While the rest of the men move on with their night, Frankie can’t seem to turn his brain off. All he can think about are his two vices: Rochelle and Florida snow. He can already hear the water beckoning to him. Calling his name in that alluring, all too familiar voice. Begging him to come back and be cradled by the waves until they swallow him whole.

“Everyone shut up. She texted me.” Benny exclaims.

They all lean in to look at what you sent him.

“She’s just asking about the schedule, dumbass.” Santi scoffs. “Have her send a picture.”

“And how the fuck am I supposed to ask for a picture without sounding creepy?”

“You could tell her that you need a picture to use for her login profile at work?” Frankie offers, desperate to distract his mind from his own thoughts.

“Fish, you’re a Goddamn genius.”

Santi gets up to buy another round for the table while Benny crafts his text to you. He hits send only after he has gotten the green light from everybody. They all wait anxiously for the next few minutes until they see your name appear on the phone screen. Benny scrambles to type in his password as the guys all crane their necks to see a glimpse of the photo. 

“You way undersold her, Benny. She’s gorgeous.” Santi marvels and Will agrees.

“Wow,” is all Frankie can muster as he looks at you. He tries to memorize everything about you. The way your hair falls, how kind your eyes are, and how soft your lips look. He feels his ears burn as he looks at your nose and wonders what it would be like to kiss you on the bridge of it. With each new thing he finds on your face to admire, the water’s voice gets quieter and quieter until it's nothing but a whisper. Still there, but only a whisper.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

[vulpes115]

Where the Marauders Era Characters Lived During the War

James and Lily - Bought a house together with a little help from Effie and Monty

Sirius and Remus - Lived together in Sirius’s flat that Sirius was able to afford thanks to Uncle Alphard

Peter - Still lived at his mom’s house but he’d disappear for periods of time (huh, what’s up with that?)

Marlene and Mary - They rented a flat together in muggle London, they supported it as Mary, and Marlene, would do some shifts at a local diner before Marlene had to quit due to the Order needing her at too random of a time. Mary wanted more independence from her family, Marlene wanted that too (her and her mom had issues) but also she wanted to stay away from her family because she didn’t want to risk them getting hurt

Dorcas - Her family kicked her out (it was not done out of maliciousness for the record, it was them trying to force Dorcas into not joining the Order and risking her life…it did not work and then Dorcas was too stubborn and too scared of her family getting caught in the crossfire to come home when they rescinded the deal and started begging her to come back…whoops.). The Tonks family offered to take her in as Andromeda knew the feelings of trying to prove yourself the ‘good Slytherin’ that drove Dorcas. Plus Andromeda just missed having sisters and appreciated having another young women live with her. Also Dora adored her and she may or may not have been 7 year old Dora’s gay awakening and a big inspiration for why she wanted to be an auror.

Dorcas and Marlene - Eventually Dorcas was able to get a job as an auror (Mad-Eye was ok counting her Order missions as her training, as she got more in the field action than your average recruit and after a very abridged two months of more ‘official’ training overseen by Alice, she got hired) and after she got enough money to buy her own flat, she did. Marlene naturally came with, especially since Mary and Marlene had taken to fighting about the war and their positions in it, so by early 1981 they were living in a shared flat together.

Regulus - Lived at Grimmauld Place his entire life

Evan and Barty - As soon as Barty graduated, he moved to the Rosier manor, especially as he got more involved with the Death Eaters. Evan’s father was ok with Barty living under his roof as long as he seemed a loyal follower of Voldemort and he didn’t suspect the two’s relationship. However Evan and Barty did take that opportunity to share a room, even if they had to be discreet about it.

Pandora - Evan made it part of the deal with their father that if he got the dark mark, Pandora would stay out of the war so he sent her to go live with a relative in France, however after engagement plans were made with someone Pandora considered horrible and a bore, she eloped with Xenophilius, who she had met while in France and he was doing more research on gnargles for his future magazine, for awhile they traveled the world together, a distraction for Pandora from the fact that she couldn’t stop any of the visions she saw from happening back in England and a way for her to find out more about horcruxes and how to destroy them. Eventually Pandora ended up pregnant so they bought a flat back in France with the money Xeno got from starting the Quibbler so Luna can be born as Pandora didn’t want to go back to England yet and only after the war was over did she finally go back

[shadowkat678]

For someone who’s talked so much about the value of hope, I don’t think I’ve been doing much to show that I believe it. Saying, maybe, but not doing. Not really.

I wish I could claim that it’s just been a hard time lately, but that’d be downplaying the length of it. Two years ago I wrote an essay on the concept of Hopepunk by Alexandria Rowland. I wrote that I’d been clinging to the concept like a life raft, but I’m not sure if that’s true. Clinging is active. Drifting might be more apt. Passively draped around it while screaming at others to hold on. I didn’t have the energy myself.

My family likes to tell the story about how I learned to swim, in Florida at my great grandmother’s pool. I was four years old. Stubborn even then, they’d say. Smug, even.

We had a rule like responsible families do that kids had to wear water wings, but I’d been wearing them. The whole trip I’d been wearing them, and I was doing fine. In fact, they were slowing me down. So, I decided I was going to show off, called out for my great gran and mom to watch, tore off the wings, and ran straight for the deep end of the pool.

I don’t remember much after, but I remember somehow making it to the other side of the pool, my mother worried and scolding me as she pulled me out, and my great grandma laughing. The story always ends with my mother mimicking me, saying, “I told you I could” like the smart mouthed child I was. But I also remember the fear before that. The flashes of my head bobbing below the water. Of the glass roof surrounding the pool room above as I tried to orient myself.

Two years ago, after just learning to drive and never living away from family, I moved all the way across the country. My car broke down halfway. The engine was overheating. I tried to keep driving. I’m lucky I made it into the autozone just as it gave out.

My whole life has been me jumping into the deep end, getting out, catching my breath, and doing it again, pushing myself to keep going, with or without the support. But through the last year the weight has increased. The water is deeper now, and the shore is a lot farther away. I’m not sure who’s running to the other side to try and grab me.

When the news broke, I felt like I was finally drowning. On election night (or very early morning, by the time I checked the results) I didn’t sleep, I was too busy crying. The second day I spent sleeping. The third day, I turned to music, old songs made years earlier and still far too relevant. Protest songs. Punk music. Lyrics that screamed the same anger and sadness and loss I felt. The rage at a system that is still continuously failing us and leaving us to tread water.

I didn't know why this hit me harder. Not that other instances had been exactly easy, of course. Then I read a post that someone else wrote.

They'd been used to being angry. Being tired. Being disappointed. But they weren't used to hoping. They let themselves hope. And they watched it implode.

I think one of the reasons I've been so fixated on the idea of hope is because honestly, as much as I like to pretend, I haven't actually had a lot of it.

I knew there was a chance of loss. I knew there were still plenty who supported the policies of Trump, or at the very least overlooked them in the hopes of gaining safety to float away from their own fears and concerns. But the magnitude of it still caught me off guard. The emboldening of those who resonate with him, even if a smaller subsect of the total numbers, frankly scares the shit out of me.

I had hoped that after one term we'd learned. I hoped that while things weren't perfect, the match of progress was going steadily forward, even with backsliding. I hoped that people had become more aware the past few years, even with hatred very much alive and well. Even with genocide. Even with natural disasters. Even with everything else. I hoped that maybe, just maybe, there were enough people that saw now to at least choose someone who'd mitigate the damage of the situation our world is facing, as much as there still is to fight for.

And I watched my hope implode. I watched the country vote across the board for people who have been nothing but loudly vocal about their intentions and hatred. More even than the first go. After we already have been seeing a mass movement to repeal civil rights and protection for minorities and vulnerable populations.

I watched it happen in a way that could not be brushed aside as a near miss. It was a landslide.

I wanted to sink. I felt so tired at that moment. Of fighting. Of hoping. Of seeing the support I’d finally relented into admitting I needed so badly being ripped away from me. Why should I keep swimming if it only ends with me drowning again? Not that this is exactly new for most minorities, but it felt like things were changing. People were waking up. Before it just was. This was a slap in the face.

And yet. And yet.

I started moving anyway. After three or so days, the panic receded, and I started treading water again.

I went to the grocery store. I got hugged by a stranger while I was checking out groceries, and we shared our fears. She told me about her kids. I told her about how I was hoping to start T this year. I cried again in the middle of the check out line.

I went on a walk at 3am and kicked a Trump sign. I didn’t watch the sunset, but I did watch the sunrise. I checked in with friends. I sat with myself. I cried again. I screamed in my car, the same one that has been sitting for three months waiting for a repair that no one in town but the manufacturer can fix an issue with, that’s been booked for one and a half of those months after I dropped 2k on other car issues before that.

I accepted that in no way, shape, or form am I remotely fucking okay. The world is not okay. Genocide. Natural disasters. Climate change. Emerging facism. Those aren’t things you can be okay with if you’re paying attention.

I have no idea what’s going to greet me as I head towards shore. I don’t know exactly what lurks under the water. I don’t even know if there’s going to be a shore to reach.

Part of me feels like raging against that is just a way to cope. But we only have the options in front of us, no matter how tired we are, and despite all these feelings. Despite it all. I’m still swimming, for some fucking reason.

Maybe it’s instinct at this point. That same stubbornness I had as a child pushing back against the waves crashing down around me.

Maybe I just don't want them to get the satisfaction of winning here too.

Feel the feelings. Acknowledge the situation. But FUCK them if they think this is over. If I stop swimming, it will be. At least for me. And I can't let myself accept that.

So I'm going to keep going the same way I always have. Because I can't turn back on what's happened. I can't change it. I can't make the storm in front of me disappear. But I can live through it. I can show up on the other side. I can build another support to help me on the days I'm tired, and I can try my best to build a raft big enough to pull others onto with me.

They can vote away our rights. They can try their best to intimidate us. But they can't make us lay down for it. Be afraid. Be sad. Be angry. But they don't get to drown us. Fuck that.

I've been clinging to hope like a life raft, but hope is motion. Hope is a muscle you train. Hope isn't thrown to you. It's taken and built with bloody, stubborn hands.

Sometimes hope is a burden, not a gift. Sometimes you don't want it. I don't want to fight. I want rest. I want peace. I want safety. But that isn't handed to me either, even if it's unfair.

It's not something you can take and hold and keep. You have to build it up, consciously and constantly. You can share it, but you can't promise it's going to stay without maintenance.

When it's taken, you have to find it again, and you have to accept it's going to hurt every time.

You have to be ready to open yourself to what that means. To hope is to face disappointment, again and again and again, and decide to keep after it anyway, because the only other choice isn't any better.

Sometimes it's more sadness than rage. A quiet voice of longing for what you wish could be, and the knowledge that if no one else is going to make it so, you have a choice if you accept it or try and make the change you long for, even if it's smaller than you'd like, because it's better than nothing. A small act of resisting when your arms feel like lead and you're hardly able to keep your head above the water line.

Self destruction is what they want. Hope is turning the page, even if what comes next is scary, again hoping that eventually a new chapter can be written. It's pushing the boulder up the hill. It's going out in public despite the best efforts to shut you away. It's spite. It's love. It's anger. It's continuing to live despite all efforts to make you choose to the contrary.

And that's how change works too.

Uninteresting times are a myth. The world is always chaos. People are always having to fight for things that in a just world would already exist. This fight, these feelings, aren't new.

Here in the USA where I am, only a few decades ago women couldn't own their own bank account. In my grandmother's lifetime Jim Crow was still in effect. Same sex couples have only been decriminalized since 2003, and still are fighting for that much throughout other parts of the world.

If those who came before us facing injustice gave into these feelings at every setback, we wouldn't be far enough along to feel these losses.

Does that make it sting less? No! It doesn't! But it's still important to remember. It's proof. Hope is not pointless, as much as it hurts. To continue moving forward you have to go through the rough waters.

We're in the storm together now, and there's only one direction we can go to get out. Feel your feelings and please. Keep moving. I love you. I see you. I'm so sorry. But one day the waters will be calmer. Keep allowing yourself to hope. If you struggle to do so alone, let this help to start, when you're ready.

[crowvainn]

sighh, big vent/rant abt my life issues bc im lowkey tweaking 💔

had a mental breakdown bc im stressed about what will happen to me in the futureeee (anxiety! how fun /sarc) and im really unhappy with the fact that my mom will never accept my gender identity (shes islamic…) and i genuinely feel like a piece of shit bc i seem to always act like a ungrateful and selfish bitch-

a couple days ago i had heartburn, because i don’t eat particularly well (binge eating and eating unhealthy food in general… i really try to not to do so but it’s hard :() and that made my mom pretty stressed and i felt horrible about it and im scared with the possibility that i could damage myself greatly.

i also generally act stubborn and, well, not the best- it causes her to be pretty snappy with me (which i understand, i just wish she isn’t so harsh) and when i was being very much random and like… i don’t fucking know, just me being a weirdo again- she said to me “something bad will happen in your life, mark my words” or something like that. im not sure if she actually meant that (bc we were already stuck in the rain at that time and had came back from a reoccurring meeting thing she doesn’t exactly enjoy… can’t really say here for privacy reasons-) but that freaked me out big time. like… sorry for just being who i am, silly and well, myself… like jeepers give me a warning before you drop something very much not good at all that makes me question myself deeply 😨

i really wish i could change how i act, even my identity, because i just wish that my mom accepted me. i wish i was a better person, i wish could meet her standards, i just wish that she supported me. but no, of course not. im sure she still loves me, even with me being a freaky goober, but she definitely doesn’t like how i am. i wish i can improve how i act for the better, but god damn that’s hard.

and with the fact that i have anxiety (i have a lot of symptoms, i can’t get professionally diagnosed, soo self diagnosed), anger issues, im super emotional andddd im stuck home with not much to do but be on devices n shit and just,, being alone with my thoughts a lot,,, i’ve just not been coping well, at all-

eugh… i wish school started earlier, so i’d be able to talk to my friends, as well as just being in a environment where im not??? alone with me myself and i??? this fucking sucks

i swear therapy would make me feel so much better, but im lowkey scared to talk about this to the counselors at my school about it, and i did ask my mom about getting therapy like a couple weeks back and she waved it off and said i didn’t need it… bitch you clearly know that im broken asf and you dont let me? :( ik it stresses her out but pleas….. do something that can help me feel better again aghhh

i also really hate that i have short term memory, and i can’t really understand some things correctly. it’s so damn annoying :C and with the fact that i was let on the internet at a pretty young age didn’t help either. like, fucking 2nd grade, is when i lost my innocence. god damn (then again, that’s when i moved to one of the other boroughs from queens, so. i got immediately exposed💀) and i was left unsupervised so much. im still on the internet a lot, and im not happy about that at all. but because of summer break, im stuck at home, andd i don’t have a lot to do besides basic chores, hw and reading. being on the internet is a escape from reality for me, but i really wish it wasn’t. im trying to do stuff other than being online but all the negative thoughts keep flooding back in my head… it’s literally so miserable even being online isn’t working to make those thoughts go away.

i feel dumb and useless. i feel like im a nuisance to everyone. i just wish i can belong, and i wish i was happy. im fucking scared of growing up, and im scared of what i’ll become. what the fuck will i even do when im an adult? i can’t fathom it at fucking all. im worried my life really will take a turn for the worst. (what if what my mom said is true…?)

i hate panicking. it’s starting to become more prominent :( and i’ve also been panicking with the thought of me being a therian, in which it’s like “oh no sam you might be a cambitherian or a therian and not animalhearted” to “no you can’t be either of those animalhearted resonates with you the most.” “righttttt…..?” and repeat. i don’t think i really identify as a cat at all but my brain is funky :< but like i do feel better with being cathearted. cats are my found family, but not my kin. if i had the ability to i’d def be a cat though. it would be a more stress free life 💔💔

now im using my ipad to take my mind off of the stress and rant abt this. welp… not helping that my ipad has a cracked screen and i have to get it fixed for the third time…. and that i have to deal with the hassle of moving soon… the only decent thing is me going to the beach on monday. maybe i’ll be a bit less active tomorrow. well i’ll try to- the summer reading homework isn’t doing itself…. sobbing

i feel like im typing gibberish now oopsies. its 11pm💀 sighhh I just hope things will get better soon, maybe when school starts again i’ll be able to cope better. (i feel like im repeating things a lot, but oh well)

[nyuwie]

His Obsession

ML x Reader

You were at a nightclub, dancing, drinking, and simply having a good time with your buddies. While dancing, you notice a bunch of guys stroll in, but you don't pay much attention until Damian walks in with a group of his friends. The moment you make eye contact, he goes from calm and pleasant to upset.

He rapidly approaches, tossing his jacket at you. "Put this on. Now." He says, clearly irritated with how you were dressed; you knew he wasn't going to leave you alone for the rest of the night.

"No way. You're not my boyfriend or something." You said as you rolled your eyes at him.

"Do you want to get harassed?"

Damian said upset, now that you had some baggy clothes on you, he was relieved, but now you wouldn't be able to catch the attention of any guys, which he was content with that.

"And do you really think anyone worth your time would even look at you?

"I am already being harassed by you." You said sarcastically.

Damian glared at your comment, not finding it funny in the least, instead now standing really close, towering over you, and wrapping his arm around your waist, making it where you couldn't move, pulling you into him.

"You're very mouthy tonight. Do I have to make you bite your damn tongue?"

He said, now sounding upset about your comment.

"Still not gonna wear your jacket." You said as you took a sip of your drink.

Damian just rolled his eyes. Of course, you were being stubborn, you just couldn't be cooperative, could you?

"I hate you." He muttered, but even with the jacket, boys were still looking at you.

Damian tightened his grip on your waist, pulling you closer, trying to cover as much of you as he could.

"Admit that you like me, Damian." You said teasing him.

Damian rolled his eyes again, now feeling irritated at your teasing, but still holding you close to him, almost aggressively.

"Never, I hate you, I hate your face, I hate your lips. I hate everything about you."

He muttered, trying to hide the fact that he actually was madly in love with you but would never admit it.

"Quite defensive are we?" You chuckled.

Damian tried to not smile at your chuckle, but he couldn't help it, he liked how you chuckled, but he quickly went back to a frown.

"You are very annoying." He muttered, looking around, seeing guys still looking at you.

He started to think of different ways to just take you home for the night so he wouldn't have to deal with these guys looking at you.

-TIMESKIP-

As midnight hit, Damian was getting tired of all the guys staring and looking at you, so, he took matters into his own hands, grabbing the back of your head, pulling your head back gently, tilting it up and smashing his lips into yours, kissing you full before pulling away.

"Alright, time to go." He said, now completely possessive.

You immediately pulled away and protested. "I can go home on my own, Damian." You stumbled as you try to walk.

Damian quickly grabbed your waist, pulling you back to him, wrapping his arm around you.

"No way in hell you're going home on your own. Like I would let you stumble home drunk. You're coming home with me, no argument. I'm not letting you out of my sight."

He said very firmly, not taking no for an answer, gently picking you up bridal style.

"B-But my mom! She would be worried sick!" You said as you tried to pull away from his grasp.

Even with you attempting to pull away from him, he kept his grip very firm.

"Don't care. You're coming with me, I already texted your mom, telling her I was bringing you home with me."

He said, knowing that even though your mom knew you absolutely hated each other, for some reason, she still trusted that you would be safe with him, letting him take you with him.

"She what?!" You said very shocked. Your mom trusted this guy??!

Damian smirked.

"Exactly, she trusts me to keep you in one piece, and of course, she knows how much of a lightweight you are when it comes to drinking."

He muttered the last part, still annoyed that you even took a sip of the drink in the first place.

He then carried you over to his car, opening the passenger side, placing you in, before closing the door, getting in on the drivers seat.

You replied with a groan.

Damian smirked once again, starting up the car, he looked over at you and laughed under his breath. Even after you had a couple drinks, you still were being very mouthy to him, trying to protest everything he says.

As they pulled out from the spot, Mason had one hand on the wheel, the other now gently running up your thigh as a warning to stop talking back to him.

"S-Stop touching me." You said as you pushed his hands away.

Damian groaned, his hands tightly gripping the wheel, not being too happy about you pushing away his hand on your thigh.

"Fine. Don't mind if I touch you elsewhere."

He said, now letting go of the wheel and reaching over to unbuckle your seat belt, before grabbing your leg, pulling it across his lap and grabbing your foot, now gently rubbing it as if to give you a foot massage.

"What the hell are you doing??" You said as you back off slightly until you hit the door of the car.

"You said stop touching you... so I stopped touching your thigh, and instead I'm touching your foot."

Damian said casually, as he continued to give you a foot massage all the while driving to his home, now glancing over at you, knowing that you were trapped, unable to get away from him unless you threw yourself out of the car.

You pulled away your foot, away from his hands.

"I'd rather jump out of this car." You rolled your eyes. Annoyed.

"Do it. I dare you." He said calmly as he continued to glance at you.

"As I said, you're not leaving my sight tonight." He once again reminded you before he looked back at the road, smirking at the annoyed look on your face.

As they neared his house, his smirk widened, he knew of all the ways to keep you with him.

Damian put the car in park and looked over at you, unbuckling his seat belt and undoing your seat belt, pulling you against him, gently pinning you down, so you couldn't try anything stupid.

"Promise to behave?"

"Fine. I promise to behave." You rolled your eyes.

Damian smirked at your lack of arguing, gently pulling you over to the leather couch, sitting down and pulling you onto his lap, wrapping his arms around your back, and leaning back into the couch, closing his eyes for a second, before speaking.

"Try and get out of my lap, and I'm making sure you can't leave."

He muttered, pulling you in closer, just wanting the feeling of you close.

You just stay put and glared at him.

Damian couldn't help but chuckle, enjoying your annoyed look on your face, but at the same time, he loved this situation.

"What? Not happy now that I'm actually holding you?"

He teased, looking up at you, his hands rubbing gently against your back. One thing about Damian that you may not have known was that he was starved for affection.

"I love you." He mumbled, his cheeks tinted pink as he finally confessed, he never expected you to hear him, he was still very tired and wasn't exactly thinking straight.

"You what?"

Damian's eyes widened, now hearing your voice after he mumbled out the three words he was dying to say.

He gulped, panicking at the realization that you heard him when he blurted out his feelings.

"N-Nothing. I said nothing. I have no idea what you're talking about." He muttered, trying to backpedal and pretend he never said anything. He didn't want to tell you and have you push him away.

"Oh okay" You said brushing off the thought of him actually loving a messed up girl like you.

"Love you too" You mumbled.

Damian's head shot up, his icy-cold blue eyes widening as he heard what you said, was he dreaming, or did you actually just say you loved him back?

"H-Huh? Did you just say what I think you just said?" He muttered, feeling as if he was in a dream and thinking he was just imagining what he just heard.

"I don't know." You chuckled teasingly.

Damian was so damn confused, did you say it or was he just hearing things, or was it just him imagining it. He just sat there looking at you, still holding you on his lap, but this time he tightened his grip as if to make sure he wasn't losing you.

"I-... Y-You do?" He asked, still not believing that he actually heard you say what he thought you said. He's desperate to hear you say it again.

"I love you." You said under your breath. More like a whisper.

Damian looked at you for a couple seconds after hearing you say that, before a wide smile appeared on his face, his eyes full of love.

"I'm definitely not hallucinating." He muttered, quickly leaning in and smashing his lips against yours, holding you close and refusing to let go, pulling you tighter into the kiss, wanting to deepen it, wanting to hear you moan into the kiss.

-Should I continue this?-

[princepipper]

I really like your drawings of Pip and Gabe! (the Valentine's day one is so cute 🥹) If you're comfortable with sharing, I'd be interested in the relationship history between the two? I know Pip is your OC/self-insert and Gabe isn't, but I enjoyed the stories you have on AO3 and want to hear more.

(´｡• ᵕ •｡`) ♡

I don't know who you are anon but I want you to know that someone taking interest in my ideas and OC, even if it's all based around my friend's character, is super touching and I'm flattered!

Buckle up, I'm gonna give you a rundown of what's already established regarding Pip n' Gabe, some backstory, and some future plans as well (without giving away TOO much as I will eventually be making more fanfics...)

So, in the little universe I've whipped up and placed these characters into, Pipper Hughes moves to Thornville when she is 8 years old, and lives with her mom in the house next door to Gabe and his family. Gabe is 10 at the time, just two years older, and even though he's pretty reserved as a kid, Pip manages to draw him in by interacting with him at school. The two are similar when it comes to interests, they like Pokemon and video games, drawing, etc... it's mentioned in my story "The Wheel of Life", but Gabe admits that even befriending him as a child was an impressive feat, and Pip was really his first friend.

My verse has some major differences from canon and mainly that is to do with the fact that I blended in One's main story with the uncomfortable!AU, making One and Gabe twin brothers. In canon, it's when they're about 11 that the accident with Matt, their little brother, happens. In my verse I tie this in and Matt tragically dies when struggling to escape from Gabe, who tied him to a tree. I haven't worked out much in terms of how this affects Pip's relationship with Gabe, but what I can tell you is that she knew him for barely a year before he began acting out so badly that he was hospitalized, her being left to wonder what happened to her next door friend.

I'd imagine that he would have to be kept in the hospital for a time, to sort out what was causing his episodes, and to treat it. In this universe Gabe causes Matt's death, and not too long afterwards he relapses and carves those eye-shaped scars on his arms and hands. It is at this time that his mom can't take it anymore and divorces his dad, leaving with One and creating the rather cold household dynamic that is Gabe and his father. So then, where does Pip fit into this stuff, how is she still able to remain a friend to Gabe?

The answer, simply put: she is stubborn as hell. Her mother, Iris, is rather aloof when it comes to keeping Pipper away from the Kell family, despite the rumours and knowledge of the accident. Iris can see that Pip is determined to be with her friend and she doesn't stop the girl from trying, but of course still keeps an eye open to make sure that her daughter doesn't get hurt. The difficulty actually comes from Gabe's parents, mainly his dad, who does everything he can to try and keep Gabe away from others until he can trust his son to not lash out.

Pip doesn't care that she's told to go away, that Gabe was always unable to hang out or talk. She gets a little sneaky with it, able to communicate with Gabe by writing out messages on paper and holding them up at her kitchen window, where he can see through his own and read them. Of course this doesn't last very long, and they both get scolded (by Gabe's dad), but the drive of Pip's determination eventually sways the older man enough to permit her and Gabe to talk, first by phone, then in monitored visits or by internet. At this point, Gabe and Pip are almost at the three year mark since meeting, and the winter when Pip is 11 is when her own story picks up, the horrible incident with her mom being killed occurring.

Again, it's mentioned in my fic, but Pip describes the whole thing as traumatic, and that she breaks down after losing Iris. It's not until Gabe makes a small effort to reach out to her that she is able to start healing, and once that happens, the two begin to bond much more, becoming very close friends and working through all the hardships.

So the story is as follows, after Iris' death:

Pip and Gabe attend high school together once Pip graduates at 14, and there she begins to build other friendships with Swag and the others

Gabe remains her best friend, and gets used to Pip standing up for him against any bullying or unfair treatment regarding his mental health

That said, Gabe isn't magically better, he struggles greatly as a teenager with his mind and often is rude to the people in his life, Pipper being no exception

Even so Pip is patient, taking the time to observe Gabe as he grows up, noting his mannerisms and figuring out how best to interact with him without causing distress

He admittedly does have a couple moments where he's so mean that she gets upset, but the arguments never last very long and Pip doesn't hold any grudges

It's a slow and tedious process but Gabe does grow to a more stable condition, glad that Pip stuck with him all along. He makes it to graduation, which triggers the next step of his relationship with Pipper

Gabe attends an out of town university while Pip finishes her high schooling, and the change leads to a small distance between them, which secretly, Pip worries about

the summer before her senior year, Swag and friends drag her and Gabe along for a small vacation, hiding the fact that they plan on drawing out a confession from Pip, suspecting that she likes Gabe in a manner beyond just friendship

the silly intervention goes sideways of course and leaves Pip rather upset, embarrassed and anxious once her feelings are put on display

however Gabe manages to calm her down and he admits that he was already planning to ask her to be his girlfriend on her 18th birthday in the spring

it's funny and sweet, and it is clear to them both now that while the idea of a proper relationship is weird, it is something they want, even if it's not as involved as other people's would be

Pip and Gabe date each other for 6 years, and Gabe moves into Pip's house once he's done university and working a full time job

His dad decides to sell his childhood home and move somewhere smaller, more scenic, still in Thornville but not too close that it's awkward

At the five year mark of their relationship, Gabe gathers all his courage and finally proposes to Pip, who of course accepts. They get married one year later, in a beautiful June wedding

The two of them live normally for another year or so, but it's then that the events of Pip's unplanned pregnancy occur, and the new chapter regarding the birth of their daughter Abigail begins

Abby is born and as the story goes, Pip and Gabe struggle to figure out how to raise her and maintain their relationship, the strain of such an unexpected life change creating a divide. But of course they do manage to make it work in the end, and Abby grows up in a healthy and happy home with both of them

So! The base of the whole story is that Pip is like a rock to Gabe, keeping him grounded and supporting him unconditionally. Gabe also provides Pipper with a sense of security, being the most important person in her life and doing what he can to provide for her as a partner. It would be wrong to call this a romance, that doesn't apply to Pip and Gabe. But is it love? The answer is yes, in a sense. Pip is more in tune with those deeper feelings and she knows for a fact that she does love Gabe, very much so. Gabe isn't as aware of how to process his emotions, and he even states in my story that he still can't figure it all out, even after Abby is born. But there's a line or two, that sums up his feelings rather well:

"...his chest swelled with an emotion he’d only ever felt with Pipper. He didn’t really know what to call it, but… it made him happy."

So I'd say that even if he can't quite recognize it, he does love her back, in his own way.

The whole story is still being properly written, I have fics lined up for almost every event leading up to Abigail, and then some after that too. I wanna leave most things unsaid to keep it all entertaining, but, that's more or less the gist of it. Two odd companions helping each other through the good and the bad that is life.

Now if you'll excuse me, I must return to bed. I spent way too long writing this out, haha. But thanks again for asking!! I love to talk about it.

[foxymoxynoona]

I was so endeared this whole last chapter with Sasha, I remember meeting my boyfriend's parents and to this day I still get fully dressed and makeup to greet them, I'm a shy person and it is disorienting to be somewhere new especially when you don't understand the language or customs! I relate so hard, and while part of it is nice that Jungkook was trying to just tease her and make it easy, it wasn't the right move because what she wants is for them to like her and he actually WASN'T helping that way! When he had that conversation with his Eomma to help her, I breathed such a big sigh of relief. THAT was the right thing to do. And I was so relieved that Eomma took it seriously. I understand her reticence but I am also someone who wants to be helpful but (as weird as it sounds) can be too shy to initiate being that way, and that was how Sasha was acting here. Having Eomma extend that helping hand is a big deal because before it was only Jungkook bossing Sasha around and he was bossing her in a selfish direction unintentionally (to go take hikes instead of cook etc.). The progress was so nice. But Tae-ri is a bitch LOL

I love that these chapters are bringing out all these stories from readers like this; so many of us have these experiences of crossing cultures to meet significant others' families and it's really such an extra layer to what can be stressful even within your own culture!

I am shy on the helping thing too. Omg please give me a job and I will be thrilled to be helpful, but I am so shy to overstep and not muck things up before I know people.

I think I said elsewhere, it would be fun to write Eomma's thinking through all of this. Maybe I'll do a little drabble. There's definitely a lot going on in her mind as she tries to juggle her son's relationship with this mysterious person, the trouble with the breakup, the fact she knows her son falls very hard and very fast, and also her recognition that if she leans too strongly in either direction she could lose her son. Like if she just gives right in and loves this little motherless duckling, her son could still wind up heartbroken donw the road if Sasha isn't serious. And if she stands firm against her, she might put her son in a postiion to push away from her --as his mom she is well aware of course that he's easy-going until he feels strongly, and then he is stubborn and unmovable.

[raineydays411]

Thanks T

 Summary: A dad is supposed to be your rock. Someone you can go to when times are hard. Someone whos supposed to protect you. WHat happens when your dad doesn’t fit the bill, and Tony does?

A/n: Hello yall! So this story hit really close to home for me lmao. It was mentioned that there aren’t any good dad/step dad Tony fics so I hope you like it. Everyone thank @alphaandromedae97 and an anon for this fic. 

Hope yall enjoy!

Your life was complicated. 

How can it not be when Tony “billionaire playboy” Stark is your step dad. 

Yes you read that right, step dad. It’s funny really, turns out he has a thing for waitresses that aren’t interested in him at first. That waitress being your mom.

They met when she was working a shift at the restaurant she works at, and he came in with Avengers. He expected her to fall at their feet like everyone else did, but she just scoffed and asked for their order. Pretty epic. 

Then one long montage later, and they ended up getting married. You were happy for your mom, of course. Deep down, Tony is a good man and you knew he’d do anything for your mom. And he’s always been nice to you, making sure you were okay with him proposing and then you moving upstate with him and your mom. He always made sure you felt included, maybe a little too much. He actually took interest in your life, which you’ll always appreciate. 

But you were a total daddy's girl by heart. You always felt like you had a close relationship with your biological father. He was a good dad, he took you out to movies, went to recitals, and always made sure to take you to the father-daughter dance your school district put on every year. It was your tradition. But after your parents divorced a few years ago, it seemed like he was getting more and more distant from you. He stopped calling as much, would skip out on your days to visit him and when you did visit, he’d lock himself in his office, claiming he had to finish some paperwork. It broke your heart, knowing that a man you were so close with, seems to be detaching himself from your life. But, in his defence he always managed to take you to the father-daughter dance. He always did. No matter how long the both of you went without seeing each other, no matter how long you haven’t spoken, he always made sure to take you. 

That act alone, reassured you that he did still love you. He was just busy. In fact, you were getting ready to go to the final father-daughter dance, as you were going to graduate this year and therefore you would be too old to attend the next year. This year was especially important to you. You wanted this night to be perfect. 

And you were positive your father would pull through as he has the past years.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You were filled with excitement as you tried on multiple different dresses. You always liked this part of getting ready, the dress shopping. 

The confidence you feel when you finally found the right dress. The happy feeling you and your mother had, browsing through the dress shop downtown. Tony offered to buy you a custom designer dress, but you couldn’t accept. This was the shop you’ve been going to since you were a little girl, since you went to your very first dance with your dad. Call it nostalgia or tradition, but you couldn’t shop anywhere else. 

“ Hey ma! I think I found the one.” You shout from the dressing room, finally finding your dress after hours of searching. 

“Come out here and let’s see bug” She replies from where shes seated. You take a deep breath, soothing the wrinkles on the dress and walking outside. Your mother gasps as she see the gown. It was beautiful really. It was a glittery, lilac purple floor length dress with spaghetti straps. And it even had pockets! You were absolutely obsessed. Plus, you could probably use it as a prom dress if you really wanted to.

“Oh baby...you look so beautiful...” You mom says, tearing for the millionth time. 

“Ma, are you crying again?!” You laugh, “ Come on, that's the fifth time you’ve cried since we’ve been in the store!”

She laughs with you, sniffling as she wipes her tears,” I’m sorry, but you’re getting so big, it feels like it was only yesterday we were walking in this shop to get your first dress...and now...” She starts to cry again.

You smile softly, understanding what your mom was saying. You were in kindergarten when you first started attending these meetings, now you’re a senior in highschool. 

“Alright, no more crying. It’s a happy day for you. Has your father called texted you when he was going to come pick you up?” Your mom asked wiping her tears.

You frown, “ No, I haven;’t hear from him since two weeks ago when he said he wanted to get lunch.”

You can see your mom roll her eyes in the mirror, “ Mom he’s just busy. I’m sure he’ll call when he can.”

“Oh sure, I just hate that he doesn’t answer you fast enough.”

“I know ma, but he has work” You argue, “ He calls when he can, and that's okay.”

Your mom sighs, knowing that you were stubborn when it comes to your father. 

“ Well, let’s get this wrapped, Tony wants to get lunch and we need to convince him to get something other than shawarma.” 

You roll your eyes, “ God, what’s with that man and shawarma. It’s like his life line or something”

“I know!”

After the two of you buy the dress, you pick up Tony from the HQ. You loved the drive up there,mainly because of the scenery, but also cause you can see Cap running laps outside.

“Hell my love, hey kiddo” Tony greets switching seats with your mom.

‘Hey T” You greet, smiling at the man. 

“Did you find the dress?” He asks, driving away from his place of work and to a restaurant. 

“Yeah! It’s like the one I told you I wanted. I was surprised it was there to be honest.” You reply, “ Mom practically dehydrated herself shopping though.”

“Oh? How many times did she cry this time? Cause she was crying earlier when she was getting read-- OW! Hey I’m driving” He exclaims as your mom swats his arm.

You giggle at their antics, chest warming with the sight of your mom happy again.

“She cried five times while we were shopping. Five!”

“Five? I didn’t know the human body had that much water.”

The two of you chuckled as your mom made an offended noise.

“I hate that the two of you get on so well.” She pouts, “ And excuse me if I’m a little sad my baby is growing up so fast.”

You tune out the rest of their conversation as your phone buzzes. 

Dad

Hey kid, I’m gonna have to meet you at the school tomorrow. I have a meeting that’s gonna run late.

You

Okay daddy, I’ll see you there <3

You frown, your dad always managed to pick you up from the house. He used to take you to eat before the dance. And he always used to take the day off, devoting his time to you.

“ Uh oh, someone's frowning back there.” Tony remarks, “ What’s wrong kiddo, did a character off that show you like die/”

“Uh no, ma do you think you can drop me off at the dance tomorrow? Dad said he has a late meeting and won’t be able to pick me up.”

Your mother makes eye contact with Tony. They both know how your father has been flaking on you and how it breaks your heart that he does. It makes Tony especially mad because it remind him of his childhood. How his father really didn’t pay attention to him unless he was criticizing  his life choices.

“ Hey y/n, I can drop you off if you want.” Tony offers, “ I really don’t mind.”

You smile, “Thanks T.” 

“No problem kid.”

And with that he pulls into the restaurant parking lot. 

As your family is seated, you take a quick look around the restaurant, wanting to see the reactions of the patrons when they realize Tony Stark is in the building. But as you do, you see a man who looks very familiar. But before you can take a closer look your mom interrupts you.

“Y/n, you know it's rude to stare.”

“Oh sorry mom.” 

So you take a seat and continue with your meal. You tune out your mother and Tony’s conversation as you can’t take your mind off of that man. You take a quick glance back while your parents discuss the dessert menu.

That’s when you realize that the man was your father!

You stand up from the table and make your way towards the man. Surprised to see him there because as far as you know, he’s supposed to be in a meeting right now.

“Daddy?” You ask cautiously. The man tenses up before turning to you.

“Y/n? Honey what are you doing here?” You notice he doesn’t make an attempt to get up and hug you. 

And you also notice the second plate of food across from him and a napkin stained with what looked like lipstick.

“Um, T and Ma wanted to grab dinner.. I thought you were at a meeting?”

“This is a five star restaurant, and you just stopped in?” He asks ignoring your question, “ Of course Stark did..”

You wanted to roll your eyes. Everytime your mother was even close to being happy, your dad always found something wrong with the person she was with. But he seemed to have a strong disliking towards Tony for some reason.

“Um right...So you told me you were in a meeting? That’s why I couldn’t come over after dress shopping?”

“Right! A meeting...I’m currently in right now.” He says quickly looking towards the women's bathroom, “ You should go back to your table hon, my boss is really strict”

“Oh right, sorry” You say dejected, “ I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” your dad says with a soft smile, “ I love you Bug.”

You smile at the nickname your parents gave you, “ I love you too pop.” 

And with that you walk off, back to your mother and Tony. You can see they’re trying to hide the fact that they were watching by covering their face with the dessert menus.

“Oh here you are, we got you a tiramisu” Tony says nonchalantly, pushing the dessert towards you.

“Uh huh” You hummed teasingly, “ Dad says hi by the way.” 

“ Oh does he now?” You mom said not convinced, “ That’s nice of him.”

You hummed, mouthful of cake signaling that you were done with the conversation. Your family finished up their meals and signaled for the check. As you were walking out the restaurant, you turned to say goodbye to your dad, only to see his “boss” was back from the restroom.

Only this boss was a 5′3, brunette bombshell in a tight red dress and having her neck kissed by the man you call your father. 

Your stomach felt sick.

“Oh gross, I really didn’t need to see that.” You mutter catching the attention of Tony who was behind you. 

“See what kid?” He asks following your gaze, “Oh. Yikes is that even allowed? I didn’t know your dad was a vampire.”

You snort, “ Oh god T, that's disgusting.” 

He just laughs and pats your head, “ Come on, lets go before your mom yells at us.”

You smile, but you wondered why your dad didn’t tell you that he was on a date. Or that he was even seeing someone?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thoughts of your fathers secrets where wiped from your brain as you scrambled to get ready for the dance the next day.

Tony surprised you and your mom with a mani-pedi day at 10am and a hair appointment for you at 1pm. After you had to get shoes for your dress at the mall and then be home by 5pm to get your dress and makeup on, take pictures, and then be out the door by 7pm to take pictures with your dad, then finally be at the dance by 8pm when doors open. 

The whole day you were messaging your dad about how excited you are, getting similar replays back. He pays for you shoes and complements your hair. 

Your heart swells as you think about how hard it was in the beginning of the divorce. But your father always tried his best to spend time with you and made sure you knew he loved you.  

It was hard on you at first, but you appreciate that he tried for you. The fact that he’s been taking you to this dance since you were a little girl is proof enough. You were a little sentimental, this was your last dance after all. 

You smiled looking at yourself in the mirror. You looked beautiful in your dress. Your makeup was done to perfection and you had gotten a silk press in your hair. You felt like a princess.  You heard your mom sniffle.

“Mom, again?” You laugh,turning to face her.

“I’m sorry! You just look so beautiful!” she says with a sad smile, “ God, you grew up so fast bug” 

You roll your eyes, but feel the tears spring to your eyes as well, “ Ma! Stop I can’t ruin my make up” 

You both laugh as you fan your eyes

“You ready?” She asks, “ Tony’s waiting for you in the living room.”

You nod, gathering your things and walking out the door. You let your mom walk down the stairs first. You can hear Tony and you assume Happy in the living room. You finally make it down the stairs. It turns out it was Tony, Happy, and Peter Parker. Your mom was chatting with them and they all had their back turned to you. 

“Ahem.” You clear your throat, catching their attention.

You see Peter stiffen as he gazes at you and mutters a soft “Wow”

You blush, what can you say he’s a cutie.

 Happy gives you a comforting smile.

 And Tony?

He has a soft look on his face, “ Jeez kid, you clean up well.” 

You laugh, “ Better than you old man, what's up with the pants?”

He had on Iron Man pj pants.

“Oh hush.” He laughs, “ You look beautiful kiddo.” 

You look down with a grin.

“Oh pose for some pictures!” You mom says excitedly, “ Go Y/n, by your self first and then with me. Then with Tony.”

You sigh, knowing how long it was gonna take.  

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Finally after three million pictures, your mom and Tony drove you to the school.

“Okay bug, is your dad here?” Your mom asks looking around at the group. 

“Yeah! He should be inside.” You say kissing your mom goodbye and waving to Tony. You show the ticket and waltz in the gym. 

You smile and wave at classmates and parents. These people you’ve known since you were a child and who knew you. You finally got to the table you always sat at woth your dad. 

It was empty.

You frown and look at your phone.

Me

On my way pop!

It said the message was read.

“He must be on  driving” You think to yourself as you sat at the table.

But then twenty minutes passed. Then an hour. then two

You were still there, waiting for your dad to come. You sent five messages and they all remained unopened. 

You looked around the gym, seeing a few parents looking at you with pity in their eyes. You can barely stand it.

You got up and went to the restroom, trying not to cry. and in the restroom you tried calling you father, but you were sent to voicemail. The you finally got a message. 

Dad

“I’m so sorry bug, I can’t make it to the dance. I have a meeting today. :(”

You felt dejected. Humiliated. 

Your father has rearranged visitation days, skipped out on little crimonied and rectitals you’ve had, but this by far was the most disappointing thing he has done. 

He promised multiple times that he’d be here. Never has he ever skipped out on the dance before.  ANd he knew how important this was to you. Thi was your last dance, and he ruined it. 

You let yourself cry. You sobbed as you realized that your father has been distancing himself from you. That your relationship hasn’t been okay for a while. And you just didn’t want to let go.

You sigh as you realize you’ve been in the restroom for a while. You stand up and look at your face. Despite the red eyes and slightly red nose, your make up was pretty much intact.

“Huh at least my setting spray hasn’t let me down.” You say to your self. After a few mintues of calming down, you walk out of the restroom and bump into a figure. 

“Sorry” you mutter about to pass the person. 

“Gee you took a while in there, I told you not to get that coffee kid.” 

You quickly look up and se Tony.

Dressed in a suit, flowers in hand.

“Hey kid.” He says softly

“what..what are you doing here?” You whisper, tears filling your eyes again.

“Well apparently you need an rent a dad, and I happened to be in the neighborhood.” He jokes, then says, “ I’m sorry your dad didn’t come kiddo, and I know I’m not him, and quite frankly I’m glad I’m not. But I do love you like you’re my own, and well...yeah here I am.”

You stay quiet, looking at Tony in wonder. Touched that he did this for you.

“Of course if you just want to leave then we can just get out of here” He rambles nervously, “ But you gotta tell me kid cause I’m kinda freaking out.”

“Can we get ice cream after?” You ask him

“What?”

“After the dance, we should go get ice cream.” 

“Uh sure?” Tony says, “So what do you usually do at these things?” 

You laugh and steer him to the tables where they have all the activities at. You actually have more fun with him than you had recently wit your dad. Tony is definitely more competitive than your father and treats every game as a challenge. Not like something he’s humoring just for his kid. He celebrates with you instead of telling you to calm down. He chats with the adults, is nice to the kids, and does the goofy dances with you. Seeing Iron Man do the chicken dance is something you didn’t know you needed till now. He managed to turn this horrible night to one of the best ones you’ve had in quite a while. 

Finally the father daughter dance started to signal the end of the dance. Tony bowed dramatically and said in a horrible british accent, “ Lady Y/n?”

You laugh and make your way to the dance floor. You’re both quiet for a bit, snorting at how serious the other dads and their daughters look.

“Hey T?” You say softly, looking at the ground.

“Yeah kid?” 

“Thank you. It’s nice to know that one of my dad's isn’t a total asshole.” You say. knowing that this is the first time you referred to Tony as your dad.

His eyes get misty as he clears his throat,

“Anytime, bug”

[messers-moony]

Wish | F.H

Paring: Five Hargreeves X Wife!Reader

Summary: Five storms out to time travel after an argument with his wife and comes back to an unexpected surprise.

A/N: Five time travels at the age of 26 instead of 13

He was angry, that wasn’t mistaken, “ You aren’t listening to me! “

“ Are you hearing yourself?! What you’re about to do is dangerous! “ She yelled in response, and he scoffed.

They stood in the main room of their apartment. Y/n was placed in the kitchen leaning on the island while Five was dangerously close to the door. Both of them at the age of twenty-five. They had gotten married only a year before finding each other during one of his trips to Griddy’s with his siblings. He thought she was the prettiest thing he had ever seen.

Five stalked closer to her, “ You are so stubborn. “

“ I am the strongest one. “ His voice was dangerously low as they stood only a foot apart, “ I will do this. I don’t care what you say. Nothing will change that. “

“ Five, please. “ Y/n begged, “ I’m- I’m just worried about you. “

“ You don’t need to be. “ Five snapped, and he fast-walked to the door.

The male swung open the door, “ Five wait, please- “ But before she could finish, the door slammed, “ I’m pregnant. “

It was new news. She didn’t find out until a week earlier. She didn’t know when to tell him; there never was a suitable time. Now he had just threatened to fulfill a lifetime goal of his– time travel. Since he was a boy, he’s wanted to prove his worth. The only way Five could think to do that is by time-traveling into the future. He didn’t know what the future would entail. He definitely didn’t plan to get stuck in an apocalypse.

So for nine torturous months, Y/n endured a pregnancy. She was carrying a child of her presumed to be dead husband, which she didn’t believe in the slightest. Five Hargreeves was alive, and she knew that regardless of what anyone told her. She had a baby boy who she named Malachi. The same bright, alluring green as his fathers.

Despite his birth father not being around, Diego was a significant help. Diego stepped in where Five couldn’t. He was there for all of Malachi’s firsts and everything in between. But he was always Uncle Diego. A constant reminder that this man wasn’t his father. As far as the little boy knew, he didn’t have a father.

Things got more tricky as he got older. Malachi realized that a father figure was more common than not, which brought raising questions. She answered to the best of her abilities, but nothing was ever valid. None of her answers could be a hundred percent true because she didn’t know either. It was killing her to see her son this way.

He longed for a father. Wanted nothing more for a father-son relationship. Every birthday, every Christmas, he wished for his father to come home. It was killing Y/n because she understood his pain. The amount of dread, guilt, and sadness.

Maybe if she had told Five sooner, he would’ve never left. The guilt ate away at her. It was like an insect slowly crawling its way under her skin into her bones and nibbling them until they were gone. It didn’t help Malachi was an exact replica of his father. The dark, almost raven hair parted to the side, the glittering green eyes and a defined face.

No matter how long Five was gone, Y/n never took off her rings. She was a married woman until proven otherwise. Malachi had never even seen photos of his father. That was normal to him. All he knew was that his Uncles and Aunts told him he looked the exact same. Despite the same appearances, they had clashing personalities.

Malachi was the sweetest guy you could ever meet. Kind no matter who the person was. Wise beyond his years and intelligent like no other. His strong suit was English while he struggled in math. The irony was amusing. His father excelled in math, but he couldn’t do a two-step equation if he tried.

In the grand scheme of things, this didn’t matter. He got all the way up to high school. He was seventeen, to be exact, in his junior year of school. It was the summer before his senior year, and he couldn’t be more excited. As the years went on, the hope of meeting his father diminished to the point where he didn’t even think about it anymore.

He had his mom, and that’s all that mattered. His mom was his rock, his number one supporter, and his best friend. Malachi loved his mom more than anything and would give anything to keep her safe. Diego had grown to be like a father to him, but it was never the same. Malachi was sitting at the island doing homework while Y/n was cooking.

“ Hey, mom? “ He called, “ Yeah? “ Y/n turned to look at her son.

Malachi fidgeted with the pencil in his hand, “ Can I- Can I see your rings? “

“ My rings? Why? “ She asked, “ Well, dad gave them to you, didn’t he? “ Malachi replied.

Y/n nodded, “ Of course he did. We were married, technically we still are married. “

“ I just wanted to see what dad gave you. “ He murmured.

Hesitantly Y/n twisted both her engagement ring and her wedding ring off her left ring finger. She set them down on the granite island before her son so he could look at them. Gently he picked the engagement ring up and looked at it. It was the only time he’s ever seen the ring this close. She never took them off.

“ We got engaged in the snow. “ Y/n informed quietly, “ I really wasn’t expecting it. He never seemed like one to settle down. “

Malachi listened intently, “ Regardless. It was almost Christmas, and he took me to go Christmas shopping at one of the malls which was outside. “ She chuckled, “ Why he did that, I don’t know, but it was amusing. We got hot chocolate despite his love for coffee, and I made him wear a Santa hat. “

“ He was never into festivities before meeting me. Neither were your Aunts and Uncles. I started making holidays become more festive when you were born. Eventually, they got the hang of it. “ Y/n continued, “ Why was dad's name a number? “ He interjected.

“ He never got a name like the rest of his siblings. “ She answered plainly, “ Why? “

Y/n sighed, “ His father, more specifically your grandfather was a cruel man. Still is a very cruel man, which is why you’ve never met him. Reginald made the Umbrella Academy, where he adopted your dad along with his other siblings. “ She explained, “ They endured long days of training without breaks and horrid living environments. They were treated as experiments rather than children. “

“ They all got names, but Five didn’t want one. He rejected it because it didn’t matter. Name or anything. Their numbers would always define them, and Five was the only one who understood that. “ She finished.

“ What really happened to him? I know you’ve given me vague explanations, but I think I’m ready for the real thing. “ Malachi stated, “ I’m seventeen now. “

“ I know. Your father had powers. His others siblings do as well. They all do certain things. Five could travel through space and time. “ Y/n began, “ Growing up, he always felt the need to prove himself, to be better than everyone else. “

“ So, one day, he told me he was going to time travel. It was a big argument that definitely didn’t need to happen. At the time, I was a week pregnant with you, and I didn’t know how to tell him. “ She swallowed the emotions arising after remembering Five’s glare,

“ When I told him, it was too late. He was already out the door and gone. “

Y/n walked forward and took the rings back. She placed them back on her ring finger carefully as her son watched every movement. He knew she was upset. Malachi couldn’t help but be a bit resentful towards his father. All this to make a point? It seemed far-fetched.

“ That solution seems a bit absurd. “ Malachi commented, “ That's what I was trying to tell him, but he was very prideful and stubborn. “ Y/n replied.

A knock echoed through the apartment. The room felt tense. It wasn’t right; something felt off. Malachi felt it immediately cause he stood up and began walking to the door, wanting to protect his mother if a threat was there. Secretly Diego may have given him some defense classes, but that didn’t matter.

The boy opened the door to see almost the exact same face staring back at him, “ Who are you? “ Malachi snapped.

“ More importantly, who are you? “ The man retorted.

Every hair on Y/n’s body stood up. She knew that voice, and she knew that tone. It was him. He was back. It took everything inside her not to scream or cry but seeing Malachi hold his defensive stance against his own father was worrying her.

“ Malachi. “ She called, and he turned to her as she began to walk to the door, “ I need you to go to your room and promise not to eavesdrop. “

He wanted to protest, “ Please, sweet. I’ll be okay. I promise. “

Reluctantly Malachi backed away from the door giving the man a harsh glare that made the man evidently tense. Y/n waited for Malachi to be fully retreated in his bedroom before looking at the man in front of her.

“ Well. It looks like you’ve moved on. “ Five murmured, “ No- please. It isn’t what it looked like. “ She pleaded.

Her hand took his, and he recognized the rings on her finger. The same rings Malachi had just been examining. The same rings he took months to search for to find the perfect fit for his perfect girl. Everything seemed so colorful in his greyscale world now. His wife was still his.

“ Who- Who is he? “ His voice trembled as his lingering suspicion felt more accurate than ever, “ Come in and sit. We need to talk. “ Her voice was gentle and held no malice.

Five entered the now unrecognizable apartment. It wasn’t the same as when he left. In fact, everything seemed moved out of place. Y/n walked to the stove and turned off the burner that she was using. Five had peered at the papers on the island that were math worksheets and took a seat beside them.

“ Where did you go? “ She asked, “ The future. “

“ No shit. What did it look like? “ Y/n retorted playfully, “ It’s not as I hoped. It’s an apocalypse, love. “ His voice held so much pent emotion it was almost radiating off him.

She sighed, “ Okay. We need to talk about that- “

“ I- I want to know who that kid is. “ Five interrupted, and she gave him a knowing look, “ Malachi, can you come out here. “ Y/n called, and instantly he was out of his room.

The boy stood beside his mom, still not comfortable with the unfamiliar man. This time Five got a chance to really look at the teenage boy in front of him. The defined face, the almost raven hair, the same sage green eyes. His posture was protective and territorial, obviously for his mom.

“ Y/n… “ Five began as he swallowed the tears in his throat, “ Is- Is he mine? “

She nodded, “ Five Hargreeves, I’d like you to meet your son, Malachi Hargreeves. Malachi, I’d like you to meet your father, Five. “

[zodiyack]

Rude! (3,000+ Follower Fic Special 1/3)

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Female!Hopper!Reader

Warnings: Swearing, Billy stuff, lyrics, fluff

Song: Rude by Magic!

Words: 1,798

Summary: Billy's love for Hopper's daughter is too strong to be stopped by the tough Chief Jim Hopper. Despite being told "not in a thousand years", he plans to love her regardless.

Note: Thank you so so much! I love you all, and writing your ideas, as well as sharing mine with you, has been so fucking fun and amazing! I'm sorry for my lack of words, I wish being an author came in handy with writing this, however, all I can say is that I love you all from the bottom of my heart. I've seen people do shout-outs, and ask-related stuff with their follower things, and I may do that, I'm not sure. For now, I hope you enjoy this... Thank you all, again!

Also 1/3 means that there will be two other fics released for the 3,000+ follower present!

Taglist: @urie-bowie-mercury, @matth1w, @redspaceace-writes, @fandom-puff, @darling-i-read-it, @simonsbluee, @sebastianstanslefteyebrow, @dpaccione

Masterlist | Stranger Things Masterlist

"Saturday morning, jumped out of bed and put on my best suit. Got in my car and raced like a jet all the way to you. Knocked on your door with my heart in my hands, to ask you a question, 'cause I know that you're an old-fashioned man. Yeah."

Billy was freshly graduated, working as a lifeguard whilst his girlfriend worked her own job, both saving up for their chance to ditch Hawkins and move to California. Sweet Cali. Billy was excited to show the love of his life around the place he called home. Though, physically, he left the salty ocean and windy beach behind, the place never truly left him.

You could see it in his eyes. The waves crashing in his blue orbs. He swore the scent had just barely clung to his belongings; the smell of the tangy air that followed a majority of the state. Working at a pool was the closest he got to the memory of California. Chlorine was most certainly not the salted ocean waters, but with the circumstances, he decided it'd do.

The way his face lit up whenever he talked about his home...it made Y/n more and more excited to see it. His girlfriend had grown up in Hawkins, stayed there her whole life. Never once did the Hoppers leave Hawkins.

But the second that was introduced to Billy, he knew it had to change.

Although they were saving for a big move, Billy had...other things in mind with what to do with his first large pay-check (or series, rather. Working as a lifeguard didn't pay well with just one check). He began to work more shifts to make up for the money he'd spent, and one day after calling in for a day off, he decided to put his plan into action.

"Billy, stop messing with the tie."

"It's annoying." Hands slapped away his attempts of adjusting the black silk tie.

"Well it won't stop being annoying if you keep fucking it up."

For the first time in a long time, Neil Hargrove was calm. Not happy, not amused, not pissed off for some unjust reason- just calm. He wasn't wreaking havoc and he wasn't being an asshole to his son. Billy hadn't seen this side of his dad in quite some time, in fact, he thought something important was going on and he was about to fuck it all up. And then, Susan retreated to the living room with a camera and a freshly ironed suit.

"You're not putting me in that."

"And who asked for your opinion?" Neil deflected with a raised brow. One heavy sigh later and Billy was leaving the bathroom, dawning the whole black and white getup.

Susan clasped her hands over her mouth, a tear leaving her eye, "You look so handsome! Just like your dad!"

Billy rolled his eyes, "Great."

However, his careless attitude was swept under the rug when the blue Camaro pulled up to the police station, interrupting a clearly distressed Chief Hopper bickering with his daughter. Billy had to get himself together before stepping out of the car, jaw slack after seeing the beauty he got to call his date.

"Hello Mr-"

"Don't even try play nice with me, Hargrove. She's not going anywhere with you. End of story." Hopper kept his eyes trained on the blond, body tense like a snake preparing to strike it's prey.

Y/n grabbed Billy's arm, slowly directing him to the car, "And in the sequel, we find out I am going with Billy. End of that story."

"There is no 'sequel.' The writer got drunk and lazy." She paused, turning to face her father who stood tall, arms crossed and face unamused.

"So his daughter picked up where her father left off, and then the sequel was published and the two lived happily ever after, the end."

While her dad attempted to search for a line that would better hers and force her to stay, she pushed Billy toward the driver's side and slid into the car as fast as she could, rolling down the window as Billy started it up. "Bye! I'll be back before midnight!"

The two drove off toward the school, leaving behind a trail of dust and very, very, pissed off Hopper.

Prom was better than Billy thought it would be. He didn't want to go at first, but after Max found out and spoke to her mom about it (the little redhead a cupid-in-the-making), Neil pushed him to go (as he was "doing something else besides being a lazy-no-good rebel"). It was then that he called Y/n and asked if she'd be going.

The suit came in handy. Clashing with his rocker aesthetic, he put it back on once more. The once-annoying tie proved to be somewhat okay in the end.

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know. You say I'll never get your blessing "till the day I die, tough luck my friend, but the answer is no!"

Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too? Why you gotta be so rude? I'm gonna marry her anyway. Marry that girl, marry her anyway! Marry that girl, yeah, no matter what you say! Marry that girl, and we'll be a family! Why you gotta be so rude?

With a deep breath, he ran-over the conversation in his head once more. Like a script for an actor, he had thought of every possible outcome and every possible line for him to face it with. He almost chickened out as his fist rose to the door, but it was too late, for his knuckles rapped against it before he realized he was even knocking.

El opened the door, eyes wide when she saw the familiar mullet and button-down. "Papa..." She muttered as she backed away and out of view.

Hopper traded places with her, his lazy expression sobering up instantaneously, replaced with a grumpy scowl. "Hargrove."

"Mr. Hopper, sir."

"What are you doing on my front porch?"

He swallowed roughly, palms sweaty against his sides. "I was wondering if I could talk to you."

"You seem to be doing just that right now, Hargrove." Hop crossed his arms and clenched his jaw.

Well, this was certainly not something Billy had thought of. He was on panic mode internally, attempting to find any response that could save his hide and accomplish what he set out to do. Unfortunately, the word-vomit button seemed to be misplaced under the button labeled "help".

"I'd like to marry your daughter, sir."

Hop's eyes grew just as big in size as El's had when she opened the door. He choked on his own surprise, coughing it off, then glaring at the boy in front of him. "Over my dead body, Hargrove. If that's all, I'd strongly advise you to get off of my fucking porch while you're still alive."

I hate to do this, you leave no choice; can't live without her. Love me or hate me, we will be boys- standing at that alter. And we will fly away, to another galaxy, you know. You know she's in love with me, she will go anywhere I go-

"Billy, he's just stubborn."

"No, no, I don't think he likes me."

Y/n sighed, rubbing her boyfriend's back. He hadn't told her of his proposal plans, only that Hop seemed to have it out for him. "It'll take time, but he'll warm up to you!"

"It's been how many years since he's met me?"

"To be fair, your reputation wasn't doing you any good until now..."

"It's not like that was fucking obvious." He slouched further down in the front seat of his Camaro. To Billy, all hope was lost. If he couldn't get Hopper to give him his blessing, he was sure he'd lose his goddamned mind.

Y/n frowned. Her frown flipped around as an idea popped into her head, her lips finding Billy's knuckles and quirking his attention. "Even if he never likes you, I'm not going anywhere."

Billy laughed softly, "he'll fucking kill me if you go against him."

"Eh, that's only if he can catch us."

"You're out of your fucking mind, Y/n Hopper."

"I know."

The rest of the night was spent in the Camaro, of course, doing one of Billy's favorite pastimes. By the time the sun rose, Billy was sneaking a kiss to a giggling Y/n before dropping from her window in the cabin and running to his car, parked far enough that Hop or El wouldn't notice. He blew her one more kiss, which she pretended to catch, then he broke into a sprint.

Maybe, he thought, just maybe; there was still a chance.

His knuckles hit the door again, shifting on his feet nervously. It swung open to reveal Hopper, an unimpressed look bringing no surprise Billy's way. It was quite expected, honestly.

"What." His tone made it clear he wasn't up for fucking around.

"Mr. Hopper, if you just give me one chance to prove to you that-"

"No, no, no, no, no. Let me make it very clear to you that I want you to have nothing to do with my daughter whatsoever. No marriage, no friendship, I don't even approve of you guys fucking or whatever-"

"We're in a serious relationship, sir. It's nothing like you think it is."

This made Hop laugh. He continued to do so, holding his stomach, until he realized Billy was unamused. "Oh, you're serious?... My answer is still no, Hargrove. My answer will always be no. Go find someone else's daughter's heart to break. You're not hurting mine."

"It's not like-"

Before he could even get the words out, he was met with a door in his face. Turned down, again.

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know. You say I'll never get your blessing "till the day I die, tough luck my friend, 'cause the answer's still no!"

Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too? Why you gotta be so rude? I'm gonna marry her anyway. Marry that girl, marry her anyway! Marry that girl, yeah, no matter what you say! Marry that girl, and we'll be a family! Why you gotta be so rude, rude?

Again, again, and again, Billy incessantly pleaded with Hopper. Different tactics were all met with the same answer; rejection.

He held up a sign outside the cabin, only for Hopper to close the curtain and chuckle as he sipped his coffee.

He asked at the door again, only for Hop to threaten to give him a black eye (which was met with "aren't you the sheriff? Isn't that illegal?").

He raced past the police station, Max leaning out the window with another sign, only for Hop to threaten them with holding cells.

He even went as far as to ask Max and El to help, but Hopper had none of that, and sent Max home with a rant full of nos.

However, if Jim Hopper thought any of it would get it into Billy's head that getting his blessing was just not happening- he was as wrong as Nancy when she claimed not to have feelings for Jonathan.

Billy had another plan in mind, and this one was impossible to say no to.

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know. You say I'll never get your blessing "till the day I die, tough luck my friend- but no still means no!"

"Hopper." Billy stood before his desk, interrupting his nice date with a delicious doughnut, and earning a very annoyed glare. "I got Miss Byer's blessing. Aren't you two a thing?"

"You son of a-"

"I got Eleven's too."

"Hargrove, I'm gonna-"

"Before you cuss me out, I think you should know that I've got a stable job, an interview with a mechanic so I have a job when the pool closes for the winter, and I've got a house on the market I'm looking at. I'm devoted to your daughter and she's devoted to me. You may not like me, but I think you're a great dad, better than the one I was unfortunately stuck with. You raised a strong and amazing woman. She's incredible and I admit, she deserves better than me-"

"You don't have to say that twice." Hopper huffed, crossing his arms.

"I know she deserves so much better than me, I'm surprised she's even with me too. But she loves me, and I think you can see that. I love her too. I would never, in a million years, break her heart."

Jim stayed silent for a few minutes. The silence brought uneasiness to Billy, but that was intentional on Hopper's behalf. He finally piped up with a cough, clearing his throat, before his piercing eyes met Billy's blue orbs.

"I'll hold you to that, Hargrove."

Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too? Why you gotta be so rude? I'm gonna marry her anyway. Marry that girl, marry her anyway! Marry that girl, yeah, no matter what you say! Marry that girl, and we'll be a family! Why you gotta be so rude? Why you gotta be so rude?

Bonus:

(after the wedding)

"What was that about a no?" Billy quipped with his infamous smirk.

"You're lucky I'm sheriff, Hargrove."

Why you gotta be so rude?

[adachys]

shinji and asuka’s relationship

so a big part of evangelion (and a highly misunderstood one) is shinji and asuka’s relationship and how they interact with each other. I’ll be referring only to the TV series and not the rebuilds. I’ll try my best to make this understandable.

keep in note that i will mention some sensitive topics. if you are familiar with evangelion then it shouldn’t be anything new, but keep in mind anyways.

so as obvious as it is both of asuka and shinji have experienced trauma very early on in their lives that cause them to act the way they act. and that cause them to clash, even though they’re so similar. the fact they are teenagers in the series is also important to remember.

im gonna go off my memory and some things i read so my order of events may not be 100% accurate. When asuka first comes in and right off the bat she shows attitude, and is blunt and to the point. Shinji is intimidated by her. Shortly after meeting her he finds out that she is going to live with him at misato’s place. When an angel arrives she is going to fight in unit-02 in Japan for the first time! But, since it gets the upper hand, shinji and asuka have to synchronize and fight together, which isn’t as easy as it seems. They must go through a synchronization phase and have a little less than a week to do so (my favorite episode personally)

So at this point their relationship is just not generally getting along, but they don’t really hate each other. Asuka likes to tease Shinji and he just accepts it because thats just how he is. But something else that happens is telling of shinji’s character. That time they slept together, shinji was restless and… sees asukas cleavage. For some reason, he goes and tries to kiss her until she sleeptalks about her mom and they both turn away. Why does he do this? Because he is too scared to show his affection when she is awake. My interpretation is that his attraction to her is mainly physical but he also sought validation and affection too. This also connects to *that* scene in EoE but I will talk about that later… On Asuka’s end it is true she “likes” him but she is too stubborn to be up front about it. Another thing that happened is that when she asked if they wanted to kiss he didn’t have a reaction and when they did he just stood there. He closets his emotions towards her when she’s right there.

Asuka being someone who always wants to be the best, his stiff reaction to this confuses and frustrates her. I forget if this happened after the “kiss” or not, but Asuka also references the “Impenetrable wall of Jericho”, while slamming her room closed. And well, the wall of Jericho was brought down by the sounds of ritual horns. While this is a weird way of dropping hints… she wanted Shinji to make the first move and talk to her. Yet he never made the effort to speak to her. A.T Fields and Hedgehog’s Dilemma.

We all know Asuka wasn’t loved enough by her mom, who she witnessed commit suicide. Her mom also gave more attention to a doll than her own daughter. Because of this Asuka wants to be the best and be independent so she wouldn’t have to rely on anyone anymore and wouldn’t be second choice to anyone. But deep down, she’s just like Shinji. Deprived of love. Shinji has abandonment issues and is too scared to be close with anyone because he doesn’t want to be hurt, yet he wants to be loved unconditionally. And he doesn’t even understand himself, let alone others.

They cope very differently and clash. I don’t really remember what else significant to their relationship happens in the series so I’m going to move on to talk about EoE.

Beginning with one of the most weirdest, controversial scenes. The hospital scene.

The first scene in EoE is Shinji visiting Asuka. This is already a lot to unpack. Since episode 25 and 26 are in his head sometime during EoE, the events right before he visits the hospital he was forced to kill the only person who has ever shown him genuine love.

These images are from the very first few minutes of the movie before the hospital. As you can see, he is at the same lake he met Kaworu, who comforted him there. After his death, he is at the lake with Misato, telling her about Kaworu. Now he is all alone, nobody to comfort him. He has likely been at the lake the entire night, mentally in the worst spot he could be in. There’s nobody he can turn to anymore. He is scared of Rei III and Misato offered up her body in hopes of making him feel better, which scared and disgusted him too. And after all that time at the lake, he decides to turn to Asuka, who is in a coma. What does this scene say about their relationship?

At the hospital he tries to talk to her, even though he knows that she is comatose. He asks for help.

“Help me Asuka. Please help me. I need you.”

Its pretty uncharacteristic that he tells her that he needs her. He’s always taking orders, doing what other people tell him to do, and now he’s got nobody left and he turns to the very last person he’d ever want help from and starts begging for help. He even asks to be called an idiot like she always calls him. Just so he can get a sense of how things used to be again. And then that one final aggressive shake pushes her over and exposes her breasts. He is very desperate for any type of emotion. And since Asuka is in a coma, the only connection between him and her is his sexual tension. He has never done much of his own free will before does the one thing that comes to mind and thats… you know. It proves that he only saw asuka as an object of physical attraction. And it also shows that yet again, he never tells/shows Asuka how he feels when she is awake. And honestly out of all the messed up things that’s been done in the show, this definitely tops it.

So some stuff happens that I’m not sure what order it is. I’m gonna talk about the the instrumentality stuff next.

If i recall correctly, the part where he chokes Asuka is a instrumentality eva-lore type thing that isn’t really happening but during this scene Gendo’s project has been set in motion already (I think. The only thing I can’t quite understand about EVA is the world lore(T_T)

During this scene, Shinji imagines himself in Misato’s kitchen with Asuka. Him and Asuka argue about why they could never become close. When he grabs her to strangle her I think he does it just to feel something again. He knows that if he hurts someone and they are affected by it and reject him, he is in reality. He only knows rejection because of his abandonment issues. Asuka doesn’t react, and the third impact sequence starts playing. As I’m writing this I’m watching a similar scene where they discuss the same topic, which is kinda confusing but it happens during instrumentality itself when everyone can see everybody’s memories and thoughts. Asuka yells and says “You don’t know anything about me!” And Shinji argues that she never says anything about herself so he’ll never understand her. Rei asks him if he really tried to get to know her. He says he did, but did he really? Asuka tells him she knows all about his “jerk off” fantasies about her and asks him to do it right there, but he doesn’t. He’s afraid and ashamed.

“If I can’t have you all to myself then I don’t want anything from you.”

Asuka admits she does have feelings towards Shinji but asserts herself to be strong so she doesn’t have to appear vulnerable due to feelings such as love. Deep down she wants attention, love, affection…Although I wouldn’t call her feelings love. It’s way more complex. Throughout the series she wants him to pick up the clues but also hates how Shinji reflects everything she hates about herself. By saying what she said above she is willing to forgive him for what happened previously only if he stops looking at her as an object of sexual desire. Yet, he doesn’t take the hint and acts the exact same and blames her for their distance again, saying she (and the other women in his life) are being ambiguous on purpose. They show how important communication is. How their lack of communication ruined the possibility of them having a normal relationship. Shinji says ambiguity causes him pain, but Asuka says the truth hurts even more.

Now going into the final beach scene, out of instrumentality.

Shinji rejects instrumentality and washes up on the shore with Asuka. The first thing he does when he sees her is getting up and choking her. He chokes her for the same reason he does the first time he does it, to get some sort of reaction… to confirm everything is real. And because rejection is all he’s been shown.

But she still cares about him. She caresses his face, showing him she does, and it also shows him that acceptance also exists and not only rejection. Asuka stops projecting her own flaws on Shinji. They don’t need to always put themselves through an endless cycle of pain and life is still worth living even with all of it. Delivering the final words of the movie, Asuka says, “How disgusting.” You can also say its her reaction to what happened at the hospital, maybe just everything she just experienced in general. But part of her caressing him is accepting what he did and being willing to move on again. Shinji sobbing on her face is just his reaction… different from his first reaction where he argues back again. She’s real, he’s real. Even after everything she still accepts him. And he probably really needed to cry.

Anyways this was a really big post… whats great about Evangelion is that it got me to write all this about two characters, and I could probably write more (but I’m not since writing this was exhausting)

I hope that if you read this far that you took something from it or enjoyed it🤞 Thank you

[honeyhenry]

Captain Confusion

A/N: Inspired by this video that makes me weep with its cuteness! I just had to write this okay 🥺🥺🥺 This is in the same universe as Homeward Bound, which happens after this story. Feel free to give it a read after this, if you haven’t already! ALSO should note that the lovely @ohmygoodie​ is my Sy partner in crime and without them this fic would not be made possible :)

Warning: mention of operations/hospitals, and a whole lot of fluff!

It was a simple procedure and so it hadn't worried you too much, other than the usual fears when a loved one is under the knife while in the hands of trained doctors. Sy’s hernia had been authorised for operation only five minutes into the doctor’s appointment you had all but dragged him to, and scheduled for 4 days later. Not really much time to prepare mentally, but you knew it was necessary with your big bear of a man in pain. Despite the painkillers prescribed, he was walking with a limp and groaning in bed for all the wrong reasons.

In the waiting room, you and his Ma kept busy during the 45 minute wait by looking through magazines, talking about how the Captain’s quality of life will improve, and what kind of minor jobs you’ll have him do around the house while he’s recovering as you continue to work.

“I hope the recovery isn’t as long as some people have said. I know for a fact he’ll not want to be cooped up all day. If he’s anything, he’s stubborn” you sigh, knowingly.

Ma smiles, looking at you pointedly, knowing that she is in the presence of the only other soul who knows what is best for her son. “He knows better now that his health is his wealth. He’s got a lot more riding on being well now. After all, it’s not just him he’s gotta be there for anymore.”

“Yeah, I mean I always tell him, he’s not 25 anymore. Or even 30. I’ll need you to back me up, he does anything you say. I’m his equal, you’re his Mom.”

You both laugh a little, hers warm and kind, while yours tinges with the remaining hopeful nerves of an army Captain’s wife. You don’t like not knowing about your Sy, especially since you spent all those years apart, not knowing if he was safe, or even alive. The waiting, in any capacity, is the hardest part.

You’re flipping through a random tabloid magazine, when the surgeon in charge walks through to the waiting room.

“Everything went really well with Captain Syverson. He’s coming to from the anaesthetic and asking for his Ma?”

Ma grins before sucking her teeth between her lips watching as your mouth drops. You both move from the waiting area to follow the surgeon towards where your husband is resting. You speak under your breath, only wanting Sy’s Ma to hear you; “I hope he still remembers how to grovel after this.”

Ma enters the room with you following her, arriving only a couple more corridors along from where you’d last seen him earlier that morning. He may not have asked for you but you were going to see Sy whether he wanted it or not. A grand push of the door allows it to swing open, and suddenly there he is. A little disoriented but has a large dopey smile plastered on his face as soon as he sees his Ma. His heavy head lolls to one side as he rests it on the plush hospital pillow.

“Hey Ma” he groans out as she bends over her large son to give his forehead a kiss, taking his hand in hers. He spends a moment just gazing at her for a while, the love he has for her evident on his face, as she tells him that everything went well, and that he can go home tomorrow.

It’s only after this tender mother and son moment, that he notices you.

“Ma.... why ya bringing a beautiful girl here when I’m like this...oh god I’m not wearing underwear Ma!”

His feeble attempt at trying to cover himself means that you actually end up seeing far more of him than you expected. Nothing you hadn’t seen before, but it definitely hasn't happened in front of his own mother before. The whole situation makes you blush and giggle a little as you try your best to avoid eye contact with Ma. You can only imagine the look on her face, and you don’t want to get any more involved with Sy’s naked form than you need to right now.

Rather than put you and your poor Sy through any further embarrassment, Ma speaks up.

“Oh darlin’, this is y/n. You remember her, right?”

And while he’s listening - or at least pretending to listen to his Ma fussing over him again - he’s just staring at you, gazing in awe as if you were the one to hang the stars in the sky.

“You are.... so pretty” he slurs, making you break out a genuine smile that he mirrors, glad that he was the one to make you look even more pretty.

“Well thanks handsome. How do you feel?” you perch on the edge of the bed and hold his hand. To him, the gesture feels warm and inviting - even if he doesn't know you, he recognises something about you in the comfort that you bring.

“Feel like shit. Oh fuck i said ‘shit’ in front of the lady” he whines again, scrunching his eyes closed as hangs his head in shame. It looks like he might even cry with the realisation that he’s made such a foolish impression of himself. It takes Ma shushing him and making him take a sip of juice from his bedside to calm down, dabbing his face with a cloth when his juice spills from his mouth.

“Oh Logan Daniel Syverson...what did they do to ya?” she lightly scolds as she helps clean up the mess he’s unknowingly created around him. That’s your Sy, a hurricane of mess that somehow fits into order just how he likes it.

You giggle a little more at his shameful expression, before he refocuses, giving you his undivided attention once more.

“How is it that ya know my Ma and we’ve never met? Or have we? ‘Cause I think i’d remember a face like yours” 

“Well...” you start, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear to let him see your entire face, hoping it would jog his memory. As you do so, the ring on your fourth finger glints in the hospital light, and for the first time since you've entered the room, he’s noticed.

“Oh...man...knew a girl like you would be snatched up already. Whoever has the honour of being yours is a very lucky man.” He smiles softly, a wistful look in his eye, while makes you realise that you can’t wait for the drugs to leave his system, you have to remind him who you are and who he is, right this very moment.

“Sy honey... we’re married. You’re my husband, and I’m your wife. I think the drugs are making you more than a bit loopy.”

It’s his turn for his jaw to drop, his eyes are unblinking as he takes in what you’ve just said. He turns sharply - more than his doctor would have probably liked - to his Ma, and then back to you, and then his Ma again, waiting for one of you to burst out laughing at the prank you surely must be playing on him.

“Wha-? A wife? I have a wife?” you nod and he exhales a deep breath of air in amazement. 

“YOU’RE my wife? Really?” you nod again and Ma smiles at you as she watches the scene of Logan meeting you all over again.

“Am I still in the army? I’m a Captain ya know”

“You left just a few months ago. You still work in the local camps, of course. You like it there, and you’re home every night and most weekends.”

“Does Ma like you?” You don’t even get a chance to finish as he turns to his mother “Do you like her? is she nice? Does she like your new kitchen? I built it y’know.” 

You knew when you met, dated, and married him, that Sy was a Momma’s boy. He loves his mother so much, that her opinion will always mean the world to him. 

Ma nods “You two are the sweetest couple. She’s the best addition to the family, gives you a run for your money alright. She’s my new favourite.” You get a soft hug from her as she says this, with her wrapping her arm around your shoulders and pulling you close. She’s always felt so grateful that her Logan found you, because my goodness did he love you ferociously, and he needed you in his life. You were the making of him, and the whole Syverson clan will forever be grateful to you for it.

"And where did we get married? If we really are married.” He continues his line of questioning.

“At the ranch, on your family’s land. it was such a special day. We had the reception there too. And we went to Italy for our honeymoon.”

Sy is basking in every word you say, praying it to be true, as if he could will it into existence if it hadn’t already happened, wanting badly to remember sunset kisses and italian food and beach days all spent with you. He perks up at the last thing you say, taken by complete surprise.

“Honeymoon?! Oh my god have we...ya know..?” A blush fades over Sy’s face, and even though you love his Ma, you really wish she wasn’t finding out so many details about your personal life today, like how your son rails you on the regular in many ways, and in many places. He must somehow remember or at least accurately imagine your past endeavours, as he grins like a little shit. 

You smack his arm, lightly but with a firm hand.

“Be quiet, or the whole ward will know about our sex life” you threaten. “Yes we’ve had sex. i’d hope so given that we have a kid on the way.”

If Ma had had to deal with her son getting horny over his “new”wife, she was being fully compensated for it as she witnessed him fall head over heels in love with you, all over again.

“A kid?...Tell me ya not messing with me...are we really- I-” he swallows and his tears come even easier than before “We’re havin’ a baby?” With the sudden realisation, he turns to his Ma. “This beautiful woman right here’s havin’ my kid, Ma?” He looks between the two of you again, watching as you both nod and beam from ear to ear.

“You know you cried just as much when i told you for the first time too. i promise when the drugs are out your system it’ll all make sense again.”

Sy smiles, clutching your hand in his warm palm, almost scared to let go as the door is knocked and he feels you might be taken away. Instead, it’s a welcome visitor.

“Hey doc,” Sy greets the man who reenters the room, now freshly out of scrubs  to visit his patient - who if anything is now simply love sick, no hernia to be found. “This is my wife, and she’s having a baby.” he looks back to you with a quirk of his eyebrow “My baby?” You roll your eyes and he confirms it; “my baby.”

“Oh, congratulations...again.”

The doctor’s evaluation and explanations don’t take long, and while Sy is being informed, you start rubbing your belly as a form of self-comfort. You will need to remind your child that while their father looks incredibly stern and impossibly large, he is silly and goofy and already loves them with his entire being. Over the course of the afternoon, Sy talks with you while the anaesthetic wears off. It turns out they had given him a pretty high dosage based on his height and muscle mass, so he would be out of action for a couple of hours at least.

“Oh, i have your ring” you pipe up before he starts getting too sleepy again, taking the thick gold band off of the necklace around your neck, placing it on his finger carefully.

“That feels better already” he sighs, as he begins to doze in and out of consciousness. Before he closes his eyes once more to rest peacefully, a small tear slides down his cheek, which you of course, notice. Sy has cried maybe 5 times in the time you’ve known him and three of those times have been in this very room.

“Honey what’s wrong? Are you in pain? i can call the doctor-” 

“No i’m fine i’m fine i just-” he sniffs and tries to clear his throat from the sad, heavy pain he feels in his chest. “I’m gonna be real sad when I wake up from this dream. What if I can’t find you when I wake up?”

Oh your sweet, silly man.

“Bear it’s not a dream, I’ll be right here when you get up properly and we can go home and cuddle and I’ll heat up your favourite meal. I’ll be right there with you.”

“And the baby?” he asks, eyes wide. almost nervous to ask.

“Well they have to come too, they're with me. We can look at their pictures again so you can get reacquainted. And Aika will be so happy you’re back. We’ve been gone the whole day.”

“Aika!” your husband perks up, “Oh Aika, man....I love that dog..”

“I know you do bear, you just get some rest for now and then we can go home.”

Before you know it, he’s fallen back to sleep, his mouth wide open as he slumps against his pillow, completely out of it.

It’s dark outside when Sy opens his eyes again, watching as his Ma passes you a small herbal tea in the dimly lit hospital room. Technically visiting hours are over, but no one was going to argue with the Captain’s family. You smile, and he feels like he can finally relax, in your presence

“Well, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes” he growls lowly, and you look up at him from your phone, beaming in surprise, glad that your husband had woken up feeling a bit more like himself.

“Oh hello again” you smile and squeeze his hand, his slow blinking already indicating a much clearer mind, and that he knows exactly who you are.

“Again? What’d I miss?”

“The drugs” he stops you mid-sentence for a sweet kiss, acting as though a minute more without your lips would be the source of his downfall. “Mmmh, the drugs made you so loopy, it was the sweetest thing, Sy.” You grin as he pulls you up beside him on the bed.

He raises his eyebrows, clearly with no recollection of any of the past events. Yet still, he smiles.

“Yeah? How’s baby?” he holds you close to his side, wrapping an arm around your waist so he can cover your tummy with his palm.

“They’re great. Glad to have daddy back and sane.”

You swear that as you say that, he starts tearing up again, this time however he doesn’t let them fall. He was openly weeping earlier, but you won’t tell him that. Not yet.

“Damnit. Must be something in these drugs they got me on.”

“Mm-hmm sure bear.”

You stay close that evening, both curled up on a hospital bed that is already quite a tight fit for your husband alone. But as always, he makes it work. You’re half on top of him, both of you fast asleep, when the nurses come to do their rounds. Ma had left just after he had woken up, sneaking off into the night to let the rest of the family know how her most middle son is keeping after the operation. You’d cuddled and doted on each other until you’d fallen asleep, Sy following not long after as he bid goodnight to you and your precious cargo with a soft kiss to your lips, and protective rub of your stomach.

He counts himself more than lucky to have something so good, that it would pain him to forget. He was living the life that he’d been too scared to ever dream of, and he couldn’t be more grateful.

taglist: @ohmygoodie​ @michelehansel​ @la-cey​ @palaiasaurus64​ @sassy-pelican​ @brandycranby​

Masterlist

feedback / ask me a question here!!

[allmyspideys]

a poe dameron x reader angst that ends with fluff maybe 🥺👉👈

Hi okay so i took this in a little bit of a different way and our “angst” is more like bickering coworkers aka enemies to wounded to… lovers :) i hope this is okay! If it’s not, just ask again and i’ll give you some real angst! Requests are still open btw lovies!! 

“Dameron!” You yelled, hopping down from your x-wing, not even waiting for a ladder. Across the hanger Poe Dameron stood with his stupid little hands on his hips with his stupid big head back laughing with the other members of his team.

“Poe!” You yelled again as you marched your way over to him. The little crowd that had grown around him quickly dissipated when they saw you coming. It wasn’t that you had a reputation per se, it was more that you had a reputation with Poe and no one wanted to be close enough to accidentally get caught in the crossfire. 

Poe smirked as he saw you coming, trying to ignore the fact that his heart picked up a little bit when he saw you jump out of your x-wing and immediately call his name. He liked the way his name sounded coming out of your mouth, but he would never tell you that. 

“Captain,” he said cooly, “that was some good flying out there today”.

“Yeah,” you chided, voice thick with sarcasm and spite, “well I was the only team leader that had some good flying”. 

Poe gave a little chuckle before turning and beginning to walk away. He unzipped his flight suit and tied the sleeves around his waist. You faltered for a second, caught up by the way Poe’s tanned and shiny skin rippled over his muscles as he pulled down the sleeves. You couldn’t help but ogle at the contrast between his soft black tank top stretching across the peak of his shoulder. Just for a second you allowed yourself to imagine those arms wrapped around you in comfort, or being used to pin you against something harder, but you shook yourself out of that daydream. It was Poe Dameron after all and there were nicer men in the Resistance than him. 

“Don’t you walk away from me Dameron,” you spat, falling in step closely behind, ignoring the voice in your head that told you to flat tire your Commander, “you could have killed someone today! You were reckless and dangerous-” 

“Listen Gold Leader, I knew what I was doing and I knew where you were. It was just a flyby,” Poe said, maintaining his cool attitude, “Now go get a few drinks with your team. I know they miss you”. 

You tried to hold your tongue, you really did, but there was just something about Poe Dameron and chilled out attitude to everything stupid and cocky he did. It had been building for a while, but mentioning your team was the last straw and you just snapped. 

“Well Black Leader, maybe someone else should be leading your team,” you spat, voice full of venom, “instead of someone with a superiority complex with the sole focus on himself”. 

Poe spun around and his face was just as angry as yours. It surprised you and caused you to stumble back a little bit, but Poe’s arm reached out around your waist and pulled you close. If it were any other situation, both you and Poe would be reveling in the mutual warmth raiding off of one another and committing the closeness of one another to memory. 

“Enough Captain,” Poe noted the way your face showed a flash of fear before returning to stubborn anger, “I am your Commander and you will respect my orders. Now go be with your team and don’t speak to me like that again,” the tension was palpable, but only the quick flick of your eyes to Poe’s lips would have given away that it was because of anything other than the argument you were having, “Is that understood?”. Poe leaned closer on each word, so that his breath was hot on your face and hand warm around your back. In any other situation it could have been hot and enjoyable to have him that close.

You gave a dry chuckle, “Pulling rank,” you leaned closer to Poe’s face, “You only do this because you know I’m right”. 

Poe tried to think of a retort, but his mind was consumed by the fact that your lips were mere centimeters away from his. He could only think about the way your nose was flaring out of anger in the same way it flared when you laughed with your team. He wanted to say something, but the notice of your hand on his chest radiating warmth short circuited his brain and he just could think of anything other than you. Poe’s eyes scanned your face for any indication that you were feeling the same way he was and landed on your lips. 

At that moment, BB-8 bumped into Poe’s feet, causing him to let go and pull away. He looked over you one last time before turning away again. 

“Go be with your team Commander,” he said, sauntering away. 

You were both so stubborn and hotheaded, though it showed in different ways. For every instance that you were organized, Poe was impulsive and for every time that Poe was calculating, you were there to point out every flaw. There was a time that Leia thought you’d make a good team. That’s why she appointed you Gold Leader to work with Poe as Black Leader, but the first time she saw you in a meeting, she quickly realized that she was wrong. All you did was bicker, both needing to be right, but Leia knew that one day you’d agree and make one hell of a stubborn decisive team. She knew that Poe would run headfirst into battle if you were hurt and you’d lay down entire armies if it meant getting to Poe. Leia wasn’t the only one to see it, but she was the first to see that behind all the bitterness, there was so much care and concern for the other. It just needed to be brought out, and one day it would. 

It happened for Poe first. Poe knew he cared about you, and that he was attracted to you, but he also knew that your moments of stubbornness were very annoying. In that though, you were the only person he allowed to speak to him as you did. Maybe no one else had a reason to yell at him or maybe no one else had the guts, but if anyone else tried, Poe knew that he wouldn’t like it because that was reserved for you. He liked that about you, but he also really didn’t like that too. 

Poe knew that you needed to work on your x-wing and he did too, so after asking around your team, he found out exactly when you’d be in the hanger. So the night before, he moved his x-wing right next to yours, so you’d have to share a toolbox and at least talk about that.

You were still pissed off about Poe pulling rank on you and hadn’t spoken to him more than you had to in the weeks following and Poe missed you. He missed talking about new x-wing parts and upgrades. He missed the way your eyes would light up when you talked about your home planet. He even missed the teasing bickering. It all brought so much joy to him. He was going to make sure that his plan worked and that he got to talk to you again. 

Poe was working on his x-wing long before you were; he wanted to look like he had planned it before you did, so he could tease you about always finding him. Poe liked to tease you to watch you roll your eyes and flash him a little smirk. 

Poe looked up at the sound of your footsteps across the hanger. He was beautiful. The way his wild curls were fully unruly and fluffy made you want to run to him and just run your fingers through his hair. His fingers were covered in grease and arms glistening with sweat. He was wearing that stupid black tank top again that fully showed off his arms and numbed your brain a little bit. As you got closer, you could see the glint of happiness in Poe’s eyes as he tried to shove down the smile that was threatening to burst out of him purely from seeing you. 

As you walked by him, Poe called out to you, “When I saw your x-wing parked next to mine I knew you’d come running to see me,” he finally flashed you his big grin causing you to smile a little too, “you just couldn’t help yourself huh.” 

“Not when it comes to you, baby,” you quipped back, giving Poe a little bump. Calling him baby was a common joke between you two, but every time it gave a flurry of flutters in Poe’s stomach and he longed for you to call him baby for real. He wanted to hear you call him baby when you woke up in the middle of the night and wanted more cuddles. He wanted you to call him baby as you held his head against your chest after a long mission. He didn’t know that you wanted that too. 

Very quickly you fell into a gentle conversation, talking about everything from BB-8 asking for a new antenna and the droid you were looking at getting, to telling Poe more about your homeland and him telling you about his mom. Every now and then you’d ask Poe, “could you pass me …” and every time Poe’s breath would stop for the split second that his hand brushed yours and you gave him a wide smile and a thanks. 

As you reached into your x-wing, something sliced your hand and you immediately jumped back, clamping your other hand over it, trying to stop the bleeding before it started. 

“Oh dear Maker!” you shouted, face scrunching up in pain. Immediately, Poe was at your side, hands already starting to run over yours, looking for anything that was wrong.

“Here, use my bandanna to hold pressure,” he said, trying to move your hands out of the way to see the cut. You held the bandana over your finger, but started trying to move away from Poe. Every step and turn you took, Poe countered.

“Could you just stop and go get me the first aid kit,” you yelled at him. Poe ran to grab it and came back to you immediately trying to fix you up again. 

“Poe stop!” Poe’s deep brown eyes flicked up to yours and you could see the concern in his eyes. You’d never actually seen Poe worried about you. Sure, you had heard about Poe asking your teammates how you were doing or how a mission went, but it was never to your face. Seeing it sparked something deep inside of you, a warmth that made you regret snapping at him.

“I can do it myself,” you whispered, looking down, unable to look him in the eye.

“I know,” Poe tilted your chin up, so he could see your beautiful face, “but you don’t have to”. Poe’s voice was so warm and full of care, that you looked back up at him to see something more than just concern, but you couldn’t quite tell what it was. Poe knew what it was. He hadn’t wanted to admit it to himself for a long time, but finally, the love he had for you broke through. Poe loved you and he wanted you to know. 

Poe put as much love as he possibly could into gently wiping away the blood and cleaning up your wound, muttering a small “sorry” when you hissed at the pain. The love he was feeling fueled his hands wrapping yours in gauze and fueled his lips as he gave your palm a small kiss.

“All better,” he said, resisting the urge to lean down and give your head a small kiss too as he put away the first aid kit. 

Poe knew that he loved you, but you just felt warm and fuzzy and confused, unwilling to let yourself think that Poe Dameron could view you as anything other than his inferior that he shoved in your face only a few weeks prior. Part of you wanted to hold onto that feeling, letting the warmth from Poe’s hands on yours linger, but the other part wanted to shove the warmth spreading through your chest from the care that Poe gave you so far down. You thought you had, but every now and again, Poe would flash you a smile from across a hanger and your cheeks would get warm with the spreading warmth from your heart.

You’d never tell anyone, but you really didn’t need to. Leia saw it immediately. She saw the way that Poe would gently grab your wrist as you yelled at him for something stupid he had done. She watched the way he would lean back in his chair, resigned to accept whatever you were giving him. She saw that meetings started to go more and more smoothly as you would actually listen to each other and build a plan, together. Leia even saw the few times Poe pulled you aside to apologize for getting too heated when you two did disagree. 

Is kind of sad that it took Poe getting seriously hurt for you to willingly admit it, but all is fair in love and war. You were never told what actually happened, but the second that Snap ran into your room telling you that Poe was hurt, you set off running. Snap followed closely behind rattling off the whole story, but all you heard were words.  You heard him say “Poe was fixing your ship” and that was the last thing that registered; you’re only thought was getting to Poe. 

After pushing your way through people and mumbling excuse me, you finally saw him. Poe was laying on a little cot, right above the ground in the hanger. His whole arm was covered in blood from a gash that no one could get to stop bleeding. You heard someone say that Medical was on their way, but when you locked eyes with Poe, it was like everyone else completely disappeared. You heard your heart beating in your ears as that familiar warmth started to consume your chest. 

Poe looked into your eyes and saw that same look you saw in his. It was concern and a little something more, but this time, Poe knew exactly what that little something was. It was love. He knew it and now you knew it too.

“Captain,” he said, still using that annoying chill attitude, “come to see me off?” 

You knew it was a joke and that he was talking about Medical guaranteeably grounding him for a while, but it felt too much like death. Tears sprung to your eyes as you thought about losing the love so soon after you finally admitted it. 

“Shut up Dameron,” you commanded with a sad chuckle. You got on the ground to lean in close to Poe’s face. “You’re gonna be fine”.

Poe gave you his infamous smile, warming your whole body once again. You noted the way Poe’s eyes crinkled and nose scrunched up a little bit when he smiled. You wanted to see that face everyday. You wanted to wake up next to that face and jump out of your x-wing just to see that face grinning at you across the hanger. You wanted Poe.

“Careful Gold Leader, someone might think you actually like me,” Poe chided. Poe’s grin grew wider as he saw you break out into a little smirk. He would do anything to see that smile, even if it meant teasing you when just breathing was taking up so much of his energy. 

You reached out to lace your fingers with Poe’s and gave him a little squeeze. Of course you liked him, everyone knew that, but not everyone knew that you loved him. Though if they looked at the two of you sitting there, they’d know immediately. Poe’s eyes were bright, staring deep into your loving ones, both with a wide smile despite the physical pain, your hands now bloody from trying to help as much as you could, and most importantly, the complete bliss of being that near each other. It may have taken you far longer than it should have to admit to yourself that you loved Poe Dameron, but once you did, there was no going back, and honestly, you didn’t want to.

“And what if I wanted someone to know that I love you,” you asked. Your eyes were still so full of love, but your nervous smile gave you away. Poe felt like he was floating; he knew you loved him because he felt it every time you interacted, but finally hearing you say it made his whole world seem better. Poe reached up to cup your face, but pulled back slightly because he didn’t want to get any blood on you, but blood washes off and your love did not, so you leaned your face into his palm, recognizing the radiating care that flowed from all of Poe’s touches.

“Then I would tell someone that I love you too,” Poe’s voice was laced with love and adoration. It made you feel so incredibly warm and fuzzy, loved and supported, and lucky. It may have taken a long time full of bickering and frustration, but Poe Dameron was guaranteeably your best friend, and you were so happy to be in love with him.

As Leia looked onto the scene unfolding in front of her, she knew that you were finally the team you were meant to be. She knew that you would hunt across the galaxy if it meant finding Poe. There would still be bickering and teasing, but that’s where the love began, and at the end of the day, Poe would hold you in his arms and remind you of all the sweet things he loved about you.