#mom 'well u have to buy a new wardrobe u need to buy a dress for u to wear to the office u need flats'

[thestamp3d3]

my mom is fkn impossible to talk to dear LORD...like im telling her abt my internship and abt my interviews and the only thing she cares about is if im looking pretty

[phas3d]

hi i really love your works and i saw that ur req is open so if it's okay w u can i ask slytherin boys reaction if reader just give them something "just because" (maybe flowers, accessory, plushy, etc. and reader said they just reminded them of the boys), which they think is very unusual since supposed to be it's them who should give presents to you since u r the most wonderful person they have.

Just Because || Slytherin Boys

type :: fluff

tw/cw :: none

contains :: draco malfoy, tom riddle, mattheo riddle, theodore nott, lorenzo berkshire

summary :: you gift them something randomly and they're all traumatized so they don't know how to react - 🐍 :: masterlist!

DRACO MALFOY

He's pretty used to getting random gifts from his parents as a reward or an apology

So when you give him two brand new ties from his favorite brand, he's confused

He can't recall any fights with you within the past few days

And he also hasn't done anything "reward-able" within a while

So he instantly assumes you must have done something bad

He gets anxious and asks you what the gift was for

When you say it's "just because" he doesn't believe you

Asks you more questions and your replies don't help him understand

Once you fully explain that you got him those just because you love him, no other reason, he's shocked

"Oh wow, well thank you then. I'll get you something soon too."

You reassure him that he doesn't need to but he insists

Comes to you the next day with a stack of boxes filled with purses, heels, dresses, and more

TOM RIDDLE

"Why?" He asks instantly as you hand him the box of chocolates

He's fully convinced you're either trying to

A.) Spike him with a lotion potion (which he doesn't think is needed)

Or

B.) Spat in it and wiped your boogers on it because he did something bad

The first one is due to his past of girls trying to get him to like them because even though he was evil and emo, he was still hot

The second one is due to Mattheo traumatizing him as a kid by doing every gross action possible in order to call dibs on food

You explain that you did it because you love him and that's it

But he doesn't trust you fully yet

He cuts open all of the chocolates one by one, putting them under a microscope

He does this for about an hour before he finally realizes that you were right, it's just plain chocolate for him

"Thank you." He says as he eats one, making you smile that he finally tried it

The next day, he does the same for you except WAY more expensive

Brand new purses, heels, dresses, and makeup all for you

If you reject it, he'll just force you to take it by slowly sneaking it into your wardrobe

MATTHEO RIDDLE

Knows about this purely from romantic movies and TikTok

He was fully convinced it was just a girl thing and that guys never got it back

So when you get him a pair of brand new shoes, he's confused

"It's not my birthday yet?" He's trying to think of why this gift is for him

Thinks it's a prank at first

Tom used to give Mattheo "gifts" when they were younger and eventually those "gifts" would light on fire, get glued onto his skin, or morphed into something hideous

He's super cautious at first to even touch the shoes because he thinks it might bite him

Tom really traumatized him (canon older sibling event)

But when you coax him enough to trust you, he tries the shoes on and loves it

Wears it 24/7 and brags to everyone that you got him them

He then realizes he should gift you something too as a surprise

So he gets you a cute plushie and some cute hair accessories

Always feels so proud when you wear his hair accessories

This sparks an addiction in him, kinda like a gambling addiction LMAO

Starts to buy a bunch of clothes, shoes, accessories, and more just so you can always be wearing something he got

It's like claiming you as his and showing off to other guys that if they wanna steal you from him, they gotta spoil you rotten

THEODORE NOTT

Before his mom passed, he was raised to always treat a woman like a queen

His father, despite being a raging death eater and murderer, also believed the "happy wife, happy life" phrase

So his father would make sure to force Theo to gift his mother flowers, "pay" for his mother's meals with his father's card, and more

With you, he's no different except now he does it with his own money

Buys you flowers, chocolates, pays for all the dates you go on, etc

So when you surprise him with a fully planned date that you paid for in advance, he's super shocked

"But why? That's my job :(" He's genuinely upset that you did this

Thinks that you weren't happy with the dates and gifts he gotten you

But you explain that you loved those all but you wanted to treat HIM for once

And he's so flattered, he gets all giddy - Like "Awww shuckss" kinda giddy LOL

Enjoys the whole night with you and treats you out to an even more fun date next week

It becomes a little schedule for you guys, that you take turns planning your weekly dates

LORENZO BERKSHIRE

Was never treated to much as a child since his parents left him in the care of the Malfoys

Of course they cared for him and were super kind, but they would obviously gift their own child the better toys and foods instead of him

He grew up knowing that this was normal, so when you gifted him something super lavish for once, he was paranoid

He instantly assumes that you got an even better gift for someone else

But you shut down his worries and say it's just for him

But now knowing that it was just for him, he feels guilty for some reason - as if he's not supposed to have this

Tries to gift it back to you and deny it but you insist

Will keep fighting with you until you smack him on the head and yell at him to just accept it

He'll accept it, but he always feels some guilt attached to it since he doesn't feel worthy of you buying him anything expensive

But you reassure him that you wanted to get him a gift because of how amazing of a boyfriend he is to you

So he'll accept it, finally, but he definitely buys you something next time you two go out

masterlist || recommended :: annoying habits

[leia-imogen]

aaron & the family he's found all by himself; vol. 2 // vol. 1

( ft. short jokes, a belated birthday shopping trip, & an ultra-chaotic winter break )

( for @criswisstuff & anyone who enjoyed the first one <3 )

savannah, who is 5'9, is constantly teasing aaron and cleo for being short. katelyn's good at 5'6, and also a bit impossible to tease bcs she's the actual best, so she gets to escape this

cleo ( 5'2 ) is perfectly delighted to have someone shorter than her for once in her life, even by only 2 inches

aaron: guys, just try and see this from my point of view

sav: [ collapses ]

katelyn: [ crouches down ]

cleo: [ sits cross-legged on floor ]

aaron: dude you're literally 2 inches taller than me

cleo: 2 and a quarter

sav is so smug about this but in a good-natured way, in that she and cleo call aaron "kid" or "kiddo" or "pipsqueak" and he doesn't mind bcs they always say it w such a huge smile and he likes to respond to sav with "how's the weather up there, tall-ass?"

and katelyn thinks it's ridiculously adorable how tiny aaron is and obviously she uses him as an armrest all the time

katelyn, petting aaron's hair: guys guys omg he's like an angsty mini blond kitten and i would kill for him <3

sav, popping up between them: mini-yard :))

before i get super distracted, i just wanna mention that aaron met sav and cleo towards the end of november, so they missed the twin's birthday

but sav still insists that she must take him shopping bcs sure his fashion sense is fine but there's always room for improvement, isn't there, aaron??

he relents, so long as she and cleo and katelyn ( who already gave him a birthday present?? why's she doing this??? ) don't spend too much money

sav drags him all around south carolina to the best thrift stores she can find and cleo and katelyn are amazed that she can get such fantastic deals on the supermodel clothes she wears

fr she's literally a fashion design major ( + minoring in business management ) and she shows up to class in skilfully done drugstore makeup and an absolutely killer outfit for like 15 bucks

she grew up poor, and she's still poor now, even if she ( thankfully ) managed to scrape a cheerleading scholarship

sav, flicking through a rack of dresses labelled $4 apiece: RIP to little miss rich bitch reynolds but i'm different ;)

no hate to allison she's awesome but she grew up in the lap of luxury surrounded by designer brands so she knows NOTHING about thrifting and rationing money in general

oh and sav and allison have kind of a frenemies thing going on bcs they're both fighting for the top spot of their fashion design course

they spend the whole day shopping and aaron ends up with a highly upgraded wardrobe that contains a lot of cute pastel stuff and sav's promise to do his makeup

aaron insists on paying for dinner at the really nice pizza place a short drive from campus even tho they all protest

and andrew knows he's found new friends, but has no idea that it's the vixens and he's dating one of them. nicky does tho, but he's sworn to secrecy

nicky thinks his new clothes are adorable and is stunned when aaron tells him the total cost

"oh my GOD that girl sounds like a genius."

"yeah, her name's sav. you guys,, would get along, i think."

okay now for the winter break part!!

i think that you can get permission to stay at dorms if you're an international student or something??

anyways since sav's super upset bcs her father straight-up told her not to come home bcs he has a new girlfriend ( god i hate sav's father )

katelyn would stay with her, but her dad can finally have her home in new york for christmas and she really doesn't want to miss it

cleo, the only one with a properly functional family, is going back to her big family house and loving parents and grandma and aunt and siblings and cousins. love that for her.

so aaron and sav are stuck at psu for 2 weeks and aaron's surprisingly cool with this. and sav's excited bcs for the first time since her mom died, she can spend her christmas with someone she actually wants around instead of her shitty-ass father and his constant stream of bitchy girlfriends

they spend a lot of time together, stealing food from the athlete's dining hall to make their own weird combos, which usually ends with aaron making something Cool and Interesting and sav gagging and spitting out whatever strange concoction she had previously insisted would taste good

i literally can't bring myself to give a shit about the twinyards' deal bcs andrew literally became best friends with renee?? and hooks up with guys at eden’s??? idk what's going on there but it's like andrew is trying to control aaron's life while he can do whatever he wants??? and honestly wtf????

also let me just make it clear that i ADORE andrew so so much he's one of my favourite comfort characters ever but i'm not gonna make excuses for his shitty behaviour. i fully believe he heals and puts away his pride to apologise to aaron, nicky, and kevin for his treatment of them

that's definitely not to say that aaron's internalised homophobia isn't eww, but with so many important people in his life gay, he makes a huge effort to get over it

so andrew just thinks that aaron is spending a lot of time in the library or out with nicky or something

and when aaron tells sav about this deal, she's kinda horrified, but it's pretty clear to her that aaron so desperately wants to fix his relationship with his brother, and she's not in any place to discourage him, is she?

the only thing she can do is hope that he won't come out all the worse for it

and stare at the boy curled up on the other end of the pale pink sofa cleo's parents had gotten, wonder just how much shit he'd been put through, and decide she was going to be his best friend

aaron's face has gone entirely impassive. sav nudges his fluffy-socked foot with her own, then reaches out to smooth the crease between his eyebrows. "careful, you'll wrinkle your pretty little face."

aaron is very caught off guard by this, and very promptly flushes bright red, which contrasts with the pale teal hoodie he stole from katelyn

"okay, enough talk about depressing crap. wanna go make christmas cookies now?"

"yeah."

so they make christmas cookies. well, it was supposed to be christmas cookies, but it turns into double chocolate fudge cookies somewhere along the line. neither of them knows how

them baking together is the definition of chaos. they're still blasting songs, and sav is singing along terribly

"yOu'Re A mEaN oNe, Mr. GrInCh," while poking aaron's cheek as he tries to mix something. he throws a handful of flour at her. "yOu ReAlLy ArE A hEel."

anyways obviously sav retaliates and that ends in a flour fight. it only stops when aaron deadass cracks an egg on sav's head and she smears chocolate into his hair

she also tries to make him sing along to baby, it's cold outside

"i'Ve GoT tO Go `wAAyyy~" she holds a spatula up to his face

"go away."

they video call katelyn, who takes one look at the mess in the cramped dorm kitchen and sighs so loudly and dramatically that her dad pops in and asks if everything's okay

aaron freezes up at the sight of him and sav quickly turns off the camera, bcs they both want to make good impressions on him, and being covered in various cookie ingredients just won't cut it, ya know?

the cookies turn out delicious and sav sends all their group chat various photos of the process, most of which consist of selfies with her making goofy faces while aaron is simultaneously baking and flipping off the camera

plus a several videos of sav enthusiastically dancing and mouthing the lyrics of, as follows, all i want for christmas is you, let it snow, and santa claus is coming to town and aggressively pointing a spatula at aaron

"c'mon aari, just sing! please??? please???? please you can do it i believe in you!!"

finally he just. gives up. "okay, you know what? fine, i'll sing to ONE and then you will STOP bothering me you insolent dumbass."

sav beams. santa baby starts playing. aaron is very clearly going through five stages of grief in 0.5 seconds

"go on," sav says sweetly as she slides in next to a pouting aaron, "i'll sing with you."

sav slings an arm around his shoulder and sways with him, so it's just her doing that and him grumpily mumbling the lyrics

and when the cookies are cooling down, they start cleaning the kitchen up. aaron rubs some spilled egg yolk into sav's hair but it goes pretty okay otherwise, since they're just listening to more christmas songs and chatting about light stuff, like aaron's biochem course, sav's fashion course, and their dumb classmates

aaron mostly listens tho, and learns that sav kind of hates allison reynolds for giving up her inheritance when she would do ANYTHING for even the tiniest fraction of that money

but she still thinks allison's gorgeous bcs c'mon

and that sav's dream is to one day open her own boutique!!

aaron spends most of the actual christmas day with the monsters at eden's bcs nicky and andrew wanted to

he spent a lot of the time texting on their group chat

doessavvyisgay: so u just go to a nightclub every week??

unaliveme: i mean yeah, i literally worked here for a while. we needed money and nicky was already working 2 jobs night and day

actualblessing: babe ur backstory is so tragic

unaliveme: i'm a fox for a reason ig

cleo.magda: Yes but-

doessavvyisgay renamed this conversation "aaron miniyard support group"

unaliveme: oh ffs

unaliveme: sav subject change go

doessavvyisgay: i'm at the clothes store what should i get?

actualblessing: something pretty :)

doessavvyisgay: sorry, i can't buy the cashier

cleo.magda: Wow.

doessavvyisgay: I DID GET HER NUMBER THO

unaliveme: lmaooo what's her name?

doessavvyisgay: uh

unaliveme: savannah istg u don't even know her name??

actualblessing: s a v

actualblessing: damn u really do be turning on the Charm tho

actualblessing: respect i didn't even talk to aaron till i asked him for notes bcs he has rly pretty notes and also a rly pretty face

actualblessing: and even then i was like :0

unaliveme: IT WAS CUTE I PROMISE

doessavvyisgay: u 2 = the only valid heterosexual couple

actualblessing: rt

unaliveme: oh shit i'm getting super drunk

cleo.magda: Aaron, you drink? That's not legal, get out of there right now. Kids these days-

unaliveme: cleo u have literally seen me get drunk af,, the first time we met,,, and anyways this is how my family bonds ✌🏻

doessavvyisgay: that's. so damn weird kiddo but go off ig

actualblessing: no go find better things to bond about other than alcohol and weird sweaty dancing

cleo.magda: Yeah, go watch some Christmas movies!

unaliveme: nicky makes us watch die hard every year

doessavvyisgay: see u in hell, kiddo ;)

cleo.magda: I meant things like The Polar Express and Home Alone.

actualblessing: merry christmas ya filthy animals!!

doessavvyisgay: merry xmas y'all i'm gonna go to that christmas party bcs i'm super bored

unaliveme: merry christmas mothers and fuckers

cleo.magda: Merry Christmas, you guys!

[daughtercfair]

💞 five ways natalie says that she loves you  💞 ~ @xlaurelxandxcitrinex​

under the cut for long post but here

Amélie

the very first way that natalie shows her love for her mother is by going places with her mom as well as for her mom. need someone to go to the store? she’ll go with you miss. dad forgot his lunch? oh miss natalie is going to take it on over. just wanting someone to hang out for a bit. she’s there. even if it’s just to watch movies on the couch. 

she remembers things for her. look being a waitress on top of being a mother and wife and doing things outside of all of that ( ie therapy, but also doing things outside of that too like visiting grandpa and random acts of good ) might be stressful, but natalie always leaves little reminders around the house of dates or things that they are out of. as well as notes reminding her to take a break. take moments for herself. you can usually tell if it’s from natalie judging by the blue sticky notes. 

something that natalie has done ever since she was a kid was write her mom a book every single mothers day. those books became letters both about things that she’s thankful for that amelie has provided and done for her as well as paragraphs on how much she looks up to her and how wonderful she is to her. 

whenever natalie goes anywhere that she might see them, she get’s amelie flowers. always red. usually in big bouquets. 

the verbal love you’s come in a few ways. they come mumbled in hugs before school. in goodnight calls. but the loudest and most genuine times that they are are when they are just talking, alone. sometimes in a car. sometimes on a couch. or on a hospital bed, but they come out of nowhere. they are still the truth. 

Nino

everyday that he works the ghost train, natalie comes by afterschool ( or at noon if there is no school) . if it’s dead, she will ride it again and again until folks start showing up. she pitches ideas on how to improve the train and later comes up with a way to fundraise a way to update it while keeping it the same cheesy, timey experience as it was before. she always buys him a carnival snack on those nights. 

whenever there is some kind of important event, she takes a photo and send it to him if for whatever reason he isn’t there. especially with henry. when there is something to announce they do it with photos too ( proposal. babies. college. etc. ). 

father’s day gifts for nino have always comprised of the same things : candy, a handmade card, a torn up photos, some of them her own photos that she’s taken, some found. all of them she has poured effort into. 

hugs. natalie is not often one to like being hugged or initiate hugs, but she very much so has always responded both quickly to her dad’s hugs and sometimes hugged him first. especially after the incident of spilled coffee ( you know what i am talking about ).

verbal i love you’s are a little different than they are with nino’s wife. certainly there are the mumble ‘ love you too’s ’ from time to time. they can often be found in cards though. letters. texts. voicemails. much like amelie they can come in moments of silence, but more often she says them in the moments of deep fear or deep pride or excitement when the words will come out. a way of saying thanks... for a thousand things, really, most that she can’t even begin to thank him or her mom for but she tries in those three words.

Nova 

this is cheesy as shit but the first impression. natalie is TERRIFIED of nova. this is a person who, by the sounds like her complete opposite but has somehow gotten the affection of her brother who isn’t attracted to anyone. the moment natalie sees nova (  with exception of a FEW au’s, but in those ones the same applies to this after they have talked a few times ) she relaxes just a little and lets down her guard. she smiles and gives her her blessing. verbally. 

touch. now this is kinda a strange one, i know, but natalie is not a touchy person. at all. in most au’s we both know nova is, but natalie never shies away from it. after a while she even hugs nova first, or links arms with her. it just comes... natural. it works. she trusts her. 

playing dress up. natalie HATES and i mean HATES most of nova’s fashion sense being applied to herself. she does not only let nova dress her up, but actually suggusts her give her wardrobe or self a makeover whenever she notices she’s having a rough day. she may be a bit different then her, but she trusts her not to make her too uncomfortable. ...for the most part at least. 

going out. now this might be natalie PARTIPATING in the going out as in drinking and being fun in that way or being the driver natalie goes out with nova most of the time she asks. she knows nova won’t let her go off the deepend. 

i feel like, for friends especially, there can sometime some fear that comes with saying the words i love you. at least there is for natalie. there’s such a heaviness and weight to the words. if you say them to someone who doesn’t recprocate then it’s just awkward. this is why i feel like natalie says the words literally in goodbyes, the ‘ i ’part of it missing ( “ love you, see you soon ”  ). there’s a desperatness to the words. a please don’t loose faith in me yet. the biggest words of love, though, come in a single word instead : sister.   

Gabe

this is something that wavers from time to time BUT i would like to say that natalie, for most of her life makes an effort to go to everything that gabe is involved in. even when she can’t be visibly seen by him. i promise you. she’s probably there. 

family traditions. pillow forts. snowball fights. trip to the grocery store to pick up a movie and shit food. christmas boxes... these are all to be honored when they come up. no exceptions. even if you have a rocky relationship....

even when they were little, natalie has always gone to gabe with whatever question she had. homework problem? go to gabe. curious about some random thing that there is no way he would know? meh. better check with the big bro. i say this because i feel like there is a trusting element in questions and a sincerity in the ones she asks. more often then not she asks him, “ are you okay? ” or “ how are you? ” and actually means it. it’s a worrying. Actual. Genuine concern for him. 

okay. i am not going to list off every single moment that it comes up in everything we have ever plotted out B U T she would do anything for her brother. be it getting killed or killing. she just wants to make sure that he is safe and okay and happy. thank you. 

now for actual i love you’s. okay well... here’s the thing about ACTUAL i love you’s. they came a lot when she was younger. then they halted for a few years. but i feel like, at least in the “ canon ” gabe lives verse they are a mix of the three i love you’s above and the very first one that comes is when she leaves after dropping everything to get him kick started on rehab. they are desperate. they are in the middle of nowhere. sometimes in exciting moments but i feel like those are less common. usually it’s just “ i love you moonbeam. ” then a smile or a ruffle of his hair. i feel like more than anything they are said in goodbyes in phone calls though. 

Peter 

okay i am going to say one word. tenderness. natalie is someone who treats peter with extreme gentleness and caution. this is beyond her stressor about love. natalie very much so reads peter’s few words about his past and move from there with caution. more over she is one who actually initiates touch first at times. she knows when to talk and when to swallow her worries down when something comes up and she wants to ask a question about it and just be there but she tries. she isn’t gentle by nature but she is soft with him. 

trying new things for the sake his enjoyment as well as taking risks. natalie is not a risk taker. that is something that we both know very well, but she takes a leap of faith. she trusts him and stays with him for the sake of being with him. 

there’s a lot of words that can be said in a hand hold. you can say a follow me! or a stop moving! or a get behind me. but whenever she feels off or senses that she feels off, she is always quick to grab his hand and squeeze it tightly. she’ll thumb at his palms or kiss his hand or draw him closer but that is one way that she says she loves him. 

she offers advice. i wanted to include one that could be more platonic since we have some there but natalie is someone who doesn’t trust herself too much, nor does she think that she has all that meaningful of feedback, BUT she always offers suggestions to peter on what to do or how to calm down. without hesitation. 

i love you’s. they are whispered. they are honestly said a lot more repeated, said more than once with an action ( kissing cheek, rubbing at scars, counting something or humming some random song). they are usually said with the sunsetting. they are reminders. they are comforting words. they are begging to stay and trust. and they are just there. constant. warm. 

Henry 

she thinks about henry first ( MOST! OF THE TIME! ). at least in her own mind she does. which is why i am talking about this here and what she really was doing. i very much so think natalie was pushing henry away after the events of wish i were here and i think that wish i were here was very much so her trying to scare henry away and then when that didn’t work and he was still there natalie settled for trying to push him away. that was her attempt to save him from what she assumed would become a mess of her life. this is of course wrong, but she’s trying. even when they first get together she is trying to push him away as much as she has feelings BECAUSE she’s scared of what he’ll do if he’s pulled into her life, into her family. 

to concur this, though, she doesn’t lie to henry. no matter what she is feeling or thinking she says it. she may try to hide things, but she doesn’t lie about it if directly asked. she may change the subject but she doesn’t lie outright. after hey 3, she doesn’t lie. at all. 

natalie smiles and laughs around henry. natalie isn’t one to genuinely smile or laugh around people. ever. he makes her feel relaxed, like she can just be herself and that just. smiling. laughing. relaxing around him. even joking back that’s one way she says she loves him back. 

there’s an intimacy that comes with eye contact. natalie is someone who doesn’t make eye contact with people. she does look at henry a lot though. and she doesn’t break that eyecontact unless she is hiding something or trying to push him away. ( further i think that they are good at non-verbal communication thanks ). 

verbal i love you’s.... listen. i feel like they aren’t easily said from natalie’s mouth ( i very much so think that the very first time natalie says it is once he gets her home from the dance / hey 3 ) but when they do happen they are soft and spoken softly, almost as though she’s scared he’ll get taken away the moment the words leave her mouth and is just close him and the sentence is said in full. and it’s steady. firm. certain. happy. “ i love you. ”

[joaquinwhorres]

Dangerous (Steve Harrington x Mayfield!Reader)

Summary: Ever since you were little, people tended to underestimate just how badass you were. You never expected that moving to Hawkins, Indiana would be the thing to convince people that you were more than just a pretty face. Read the sequel. And the final installment.

Request:hello lovely!! first off just wanted to say i love all your stories, they're so well written and just wonderful to read. i was wondering if u would pls be able to write a steve fic and the reader is max's older sister but she's super feminine and always wears really cool outfits that r a bit impractical and steve kind of undermines her because of that but she is actually such a badass and max tries to tell everyone but they dont rly buy it until she idk saves from a demogorgon or?? up to u xxx also ( i just sent u a request about a mayfield!reader) and the idea kind of came to me because i feel like often times badass and strong and independent female characters cant also be feminine and girly you know??? anyway feel free if u want to write it like obvs u dont have to (can u tell i have never requested a fic before lmao) to do whatever i trust u and ur capabilities haha xxxx

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Mayfield!Reader (Friends)

Word Count: 5,005

Author's Note:  This one stumped me. I can usually sit down and write in one or two sittings. But I kept coming back and chipping away at this one. Many thanks to @hargroovin for looking over this and making sure it was ready for posting. Hopefully, Sweet Requester, you like it.

Warnings: Language. Some minor violence at the end.

Whenever she was asked about her two daughters, your mother liked to launch into a pair of stories to describe you. At this point, it was almost a performance piece, what with the way she had nailed down the timing and the intonations and the facial expressions she would use at certain points. She had given the monologue so many times that you could clearly visualize it in your head, and pretty soon, you'd be able to take over for her.

She would start with a story about Max.

"Maxine is my youngest. You've probably seen her on her skateboard, zooming around town." (The skateboard was a relatively new addition to the story within the past four years. Before that it was roller skates, and before that she was simply running.)

"She's always been like that–always on the move, can't stay still for more than fifteen seconds. I swear," here your mother would lay a hand over her heart, "she goes by Max because she doesn't want to stick around long enough for the second half of her name." This would be followed by polite laughter and maybe some nodding. "You know, that reminds me of this one story. When Max was about seven and a half months old, she went missing. One morning I came into her room to check in on her since she had usually woken me up by then, and she was gone. I ran back to Jerry and woke him up in a panic, and he said that he had woken up in the middle of the night to check on her but he had put her back in the crib and she was fine. Anyway, we ran out into the hallway calling for her, hoping she would make some sound, and then all of the sudden we heard these little footsteps and I looked up to see Max toddling out of Y/N's room. Seven and a half month's old and she was walking! Independently!" There would be gasps here and some form of "No."

"I swear," your mother would hold up a hand. "She walked straight towards me and threw her little hands up at me to be picked up since I could walk much faster." She would drop her hand and lean back in her seat with a smile. "After that our house constantly looked as if it'd been hit by an earthquake." Your mother and the other person would laugh politely.

"Seems like you've got a little trouble maker on your hands," the person would inevitably say.

"Ohhhh, yes, but Maxine's the least of my problems." Your mother would look at you in your pink dress with white stockings and Mary Janes (or, as you got older, your floral leggings, frilly sweater,  and oversized blazer). "Y/N is the dangerous one."

"I'm sure that's not true," the other person would shoot you a smile, pinching a dimpled cheek or tugging on a braid or patting your knee. Then they would cast a dubious look at Max with her mop of wildly curly red hair and consider the fact that she had not been still for a single moment since they entered this conversation with your mother while you sat quietly by her side, legs neatly crossed.

"Don't let her looks deceive you," your mother would shake her head. "Let me tell you about this one time, Y/N was six years old at the time, so that would make Max about two. I had just gotten back from food shopping, and the neighbor who was watching them told me that the girls were playing in Y/N's room and that they had been well behaved and she hadn't heard a peep out of them. Well, of course, it's never a good sign when my girls are quiet, so I beelined straight for Y/N's room. And I found them," at this point she was digging through her purse. Of course, this was for show. The picture was tucked safely away in an inside pocket, and she would produce it with a small, triumphant "Aha!" and hand it to the other person.

In the picture, you and Max were sitting on the floor next to your bed. Next to you, three nail polish containers were pouring out various shades of pink onto the carpet. Your mother's make up bag sat in between you, but it had to have been completely empty as every form of make up, brush, and beauty tool was scattered around the two of you. For your part, you were grinning up at your mother, pink cheeked with bright red lips and what looked like almost a lipstick mustache because of how poorly you applied it. You had smudged heaps of purple eyeshadow onto your eyelids, reaching up to your eyebrows. Pinched between your dark pink and light pink little nails was your mother's mascara wand. Across from you, Max was gaping open mouthed at your mother, her lips a similar bright red, but the entire left side of her face was pink and she had green eyeshadow which was delicately blended in with her fair eyebrows. Except, her right eye had dark black smudges across it from where you tried to apply mascara. In her hair, you had had clipped about a half dozen of your mom's curlers.

Reactions ranged from a simple "Oh my!" and stifled giggle to laughing so hard tears fell from their eyes.

"For the life of me, I don't know how she convinced Max to sit still for that long. Or how either of them the reached my make up bag on top of my dresser," your mother would laugh, taking back the picture and zipping it up into its pockets. "But those are my girls for you."

You may have aged twelve years and moved across the country, but you had to admit, the story was still classic you.

After all, you woke up every day an hour earlier than you had to just so you could do your make up and coax your hair into the perfect side pony. And you needed at least 30 minutes to play around with your wardrobe to make sure you had a unique outfit to wear that day. There were 365 days in a year, and you refused to wear the same exact outfit on any single one of them.

Ok, so at around day 300 you had to start getting creative with what counted as the same and what didn't, but the fact remained that you did not repeat outfits. And it wasn't like you had thirty different shirts or forty pairs of pants. Your wardrobe was reasonable. You just had a knack for pairing things that other people may not have considered and what your mother deemed "a natural talent at accessorizing."

Today for instance, you had tied a neon blue bow into your hair (in addition to your black sequined scrunchy), stacked about thirty five jelly bracelets up your arm, and secured yourself into your clothes with two belts.

You were looking totally glam. You had to be. It was the first day at your new school.

"What the fuck are you wearing?" Billy asked looking over at you from his eggs. You rolled your eyes and flipped him off, lifting your spoon to your mouth.

"Why do you care?" Max glared at him over her cereal.

"It's fine, Max," you murmured.

"I have to be seen with you getting out of my car," Billy's lip curled as he looked over at you again. "You should change."

Max opened up her mouth to say something, but was cut off.

"Who needs to change?" your mother asked, lightly, breezing back into the kitchen from the bathroom.

"Billy was worried about his denim on denim look," you looked up at your mom, shooting a brief, tight lipped, smile. "I told him it's very fashion forward."  

"I think you all look great." Your mother bent down and kissed your temple. "Thank you," she whispered in your ear. You just shot another tight lipped smile at Billy.

She moved around the table and kissed Max's head. You guess based on Max's scowl what she whispered—be nice.

Your mother continued around the table and stopped behind Billy, hovering for a second. She patted his shoulder lightly, and Billy's whole body tenses up, his knuckles going white on his grip on his fork. Your mother walked away, but Billy didn't relax. He glared over at you.

"You should probably head out soon," your mother advised. "Don't want to be late to your first day."

Billy shoveled the rest of his eggs into his mouth and then shoved away from the table.

"Your plate, Billy," your mother lightly reminded.

Billy paused, plastering on a smile so fake you wouldn't see it on a Barbie. "Sorry, Susan." His words were a wooden sort of cheery. Billy walked back over, scooping his plate up from the table and dropping it in the sink where it let out a loud clattering sound.

Max muttered something under her breath, and you saved yours, settling for rolling your eyes.

"Thank you, Billy," your mother's voice was at a whisper. Your stomach tightened and your fingernails dug into your hand.

Max looked over at you before standing up and stacking your plate on top of hers, gently placing them both onto Billy's, as the front door banged open, Billy walking out to his car.

"Bye Mom," Max said quietly, following Billy out.

"Bye Mom," you echoed, stopping by her and planting a kiss on her cheek before leaving to go to school.

The first thing you noticed about Hawkins High School was all of the jeans.

The second thing you noticed was all of the sweaters.

At least in California there's been a mix of bad fashion. You'd had the kids who insisted on neon spandex. All. The. Time. And the punk kids. And yeah there were also jeans and t-shirts kids, but at least they had cool slogans.

The kids in Hawkins looked at you, casting derisive and surprised looks. You ignored them, searching the halls for cute boys or a girl who was also familiar with the color pink. Whichever came first.  

Your eyes landed on an attractive boy. He was tall and relatively well dressed in the grand scheme of Hawkins. For one thing, he was definitely pulling off the sunglasses indoors thing, and his hair. His hair was killer.

"Hi, excuse me," you asked, pitching your voice even higher than normal. It was the unspoken way of signaling that you meant no harm, wouldn't be asking if you had someone else to ask, but yes, you were open to being friends.

"Uh," the boy looked over at you, giving you a once over. "Hi."

"Do you know where Mr. Roth's class is? I'm new and can't quite figure my way out around the school."

"Yeah, it's down by Kramer," the boy said, gesturing vaguely down the hall. You had a sinking feeling you'd chosen an attractive asshole rather than the chivalrous attractive.

"And Kramer is...." you trailed off, your voice rising a little bit, edging closer to the "Danger Tone" as Max called it.

"Down the hall, second left. It's one of the doors on the right hand side," he sighed. He looked over at you as you blinked. "Get any of that?"

You gave him your signature tight lipped smile and nodded. Watching as he widened his eyes and sucked in a breath, shaking his head as he turned away.

You wished you could tell him exactly what you thought of him in that moment. But instead you stood there gaping as he walked away. You wished Max was here. She'd have the words to match your one finger raised high.

You saw the attractive asshole again at lunch. You had squeaked when the lunch lady scooped sludge on your tray, earning looks from everyone in line. The Asshole was a few people ahead of you in line and at your sound had looked back at you. His eyes met yours and he scoffed, rolling his eyes. In the back of your mind a small plan formed to trip next to his seat and spill your sludge all over. But as you watched him walk away and sit next to the one girl who had bothered to be nice to you today and help you catch up in math, you decided to give him a pass.

"What the fuck happened to my car?" Billy asked staring at his Camaro. On the driver's side door was a long thin scratch.

You looked over at it as you walked around to the passenger side door. "Piss someone off already, Billy?" you asked in a sweet voice. His eyes shot to you, his gaze darkening.

"You fuckin' bitch," he growled.

"Every time she's been near this car, it's been right behind you. Don't you think you would have seen her key your car?" Max asked, opening the back seat door and climbing in. You followed suit, both of you slamming your doors shut at the same time.

Billy weighed this and decided he was attentive enough that he would have noticed. He wasn't because he didn't.

He hadn't said one word to you when you got out of his car that morning, walked around the back under the guise of letting Max out, and then took out your house key and run it along the side of the car. How he hadn't heard was beyond you. The mullet must have muffled it. Oh well.

You had decided you did like Hawkins ok.  Not as much as your siblings, though. Max seemed to be taking to it fairly well. At first she practically lived at the arcade, but eventually she made friends and even met up with them to go trick or treating. And Billy. Billy had been dubbed the fucking king at that party. It had taken you close to two hours to find any cute boys willing to dance with you. And you had thought your fairy outfit was appropriately sexy meets the Indiana cold. And while word had gotten around that you were a talented kisser and that you had made your debut kissing the popular Todd Collins, you were finally welcomed into a semi-popular group. After several shopping trips and three sleepovers, you convinced your newfound friends of the fun of nail polish and glory of leggings. They had a road ahead of them, but progress.

The most surprising turn was that you and Billy had a common enemy: Steve Harrington. The attractive asshole. Although it was probably more accurate to say that you and Steve had a common antagonist in Billy. Or maybe the boys had a shared distaste of you. Whatever it was, the three of you didn't like each other and you found yourself occasionally admiring the jabs Steve made at Billy's expense and hearing about how Billy had thrown Steve on his ass.

But while you, Max, and Billy had all made friends, none of you expected to hear the doorbell ring on a Friday after school.  

As you were currently shut up in your room painting your nails, and Billy was playing macho-man, lifting weights in the front of the house, You elected to have him answer it.

"Max are you getting that, or what?" Billy shouted out. You should have expected as much. You rolled your eyes taking a deep breath in.

"OK!" Max answered, and you breathed out in relief, thankful for your little sister. You still had three nails left.

The doorbell rang again. Five more times.

"I swear to God, Max!" Billy shouted, and you heard Max storm out of her room, and the doorbell stopped.

You had finished up the last of your nails before Max came back in. You could hear a brief exchange between her and Billy before Max slammed back into her room. You got up from your desk chair, slipping out of your room and knocking on Max's door twice before going in.

"Max!" you gasped, looking at your wide-eyed little sister who was half way in her room and half way out the window.

"Y/N!" Max answered in an equally shocked voice. Her eyes darted over your shoulder. "Close the door!" she hissed.

You hurried into the room, pushing the door shut behind you.

"What—Where—" you stuttered, as Max remained frozen. "Get out of the window!" you finally settled. She acquiesced.

"Max?" A boy's voice drifted up through the open window. Max's eyes grew even wider. She looked as if she's just been caught stealing your mother's car keys.

"Who is that Max?" you asked, lowly. You had a sinking feeling you knew as you crossed to the window.

Lucas Sinclair.

His eyes grew as wide as Max's as he looked up at you.

You turned to Max. "You know I'm a sucker for a good romantic cliche, Max, but are you serious right now?"

"It's not romantic," Max mumbled, her face flushing.

"Look, it's a matter of life or death!" Lucas called up.

"Shhhhh," you hissed. "If Billy hears you, we're all in trouble."

"If it's not romantic, why are you sneaking out your window?"

"He said he has proof that there's some sort of alternate dimension and creepy conspiracy in town," Max looked up at you.

You blanched.

"Max!" Lucas cried out, and you both hushed him.

"Look, you are not sneaking out on your own to hunt down conspiracies about alternate dimensions," you shook your head.

"Y/N," Max started, pleading.

"I'm coming with you," you announced. Max lit up.

"No way," Lucas shook his head. You looked down at him and could see it in the way he looked at your neon pink shirt and thick belt with an admittedly clunky belt buckle. You huffed in a breath.

"Please," Max scoffed. "If you're telling the truth, we need my sister. She's the most bad ass person in this town." You shot a half smile at her and she returned it.

"Fine, just come on. We have to go!" This boy was one antsy little sucker.

"Max, go with him. I'll grab my skates."

It was surprisingly easy to sneak out of the house. All you had to do was walk straight out the door and tell him Dana was here and you were going shopping.

He hardly even looked up to notice you were walking out of the house with your backpack on.

It had been slightly harder to keep up with Lucas Sinclair on your way to the mystery destination because that boy could pedal.

The three of you stopped at the top of a hill, leading to a junk yard. Below you saw a small boy with a red, white, and blue hat and…

"Shit," you swore as Lucas called out to his friends. Max looked up at you, and pulled a face as if you were crazy. "It's the asshole," you muttered to her, as she turned back to look with you at Steve Harrington. You descended down the hill, trailing behind Lucas and Max as you came up to the boys. Hat-boy was looking between Lucas and Max with a mixture of shock and disappointment. It was a look you were all too familiar with, and your heart went out to him.

Even if he was hanging out with the likes of Steve Harrington.

"What are you doing here?" Steve asked, looking at you skeptically. He crossed his arms, and you matched him. You noticed the Hat-boy pulling Lucas away behind a car.

"I'm here to make sure nothing happens to my sister," you bit back.

"What afraid she'll break a nail?" Steve asked with a smug little smirk on his face. You rolled your eyes.

"Please, only time Y/N's ever broken a nail is when she had to climb out of the window to–" You shot a look at Max, cutting her off.

"That's a story I want to hear more of," Steve encouraged.

"What are we doing here?" you ignored him, casting a look around the junkyard. "And what does it have to do with conspiracies and alternate dimensions."

"Apparently there's a cat-eating space lizard on the loose." Steve's hands moved to his hips as if he was some sort of demented super hero. "And it's up to us to stop it."

You snorted. "Yeah, ok. How do we do that?"

"Pile up as much as you can to fortify the bus," Steve jerked his head towards a large old rusted bus. "Once night comes, hopefully that thing will be lured out to the meat pile, we set it on fire from the safety of the bus, and Hawkins is saved. Easy. Well, except for the heavy lifting."

"I think I can manage." You rolled your eyes, pulling off your skates and exchanging them with the sneakers you had stashed in your backpack.

"Not afraid of getting a little dirt under your nails. Maybe messing up your outfit?" Steve poked, smiling.

You glared up at him from where you were tying your shoes. You stood up, stepping closer to him. "What's your fucking problem?"

Max's eyes widened and she backed up, turning to start the work on the bus.

"No problem," Steve shook his head, holding his hands up defensively.

"Than cut the commentary. I dress well. I like pink. I'm a girl, and I really like being a girl, ok?" Your voice was firmly in the Danger Tone.

"Yeah, I noticed. Everyone in Hawkins High notices you prancing around in your little outfits expecting people to go out of their way to help the princess," Steve scoffed, shaking his head. "It's bullshit," he muttered.

"That accusation is bullshit," you shot back, pulling in deep breaths. They were supposed to calm you. They didn't.

"Oh is it?" Steve asked, stepping closer to you. "You pulled that little stunt on me. First time I met you."

"You think I was—" you stopped yourself, shaking your head. "I was trying to make friends, you dickhead!"

"You know what," Steve made made a sweeping motion with his hands. "Let's just stop talking and work in silence."

"Fine," you bit back.

"Good," he nodded.

You stormed away from Steve, going to hunt down things you could use to fortify the bus. You had only made it a few yards, so you could hear Max perfectly clearly when she walked by Steve and paused next to him:

"Don't make her mad," your sister warned. "She gets dangerous."

You smiled to yourself, and finding a thin but solid looking pipe, you picked it up and stashed it on the bus. Just in case.

The five of you crowded onto the bus as the sun fell, Steve insisting he be the last one on to close and block up the door. Quickly thereafter, Lucas had offered to go up to the bus' roof and keep watch, and after a brief exchange with Dustin (that was Hat-boy's name apparently), in which you had almost stepped in to tell the little sucker off, your sister had gone up to join him. Leaving you alone with Steve Harrington who was flicking a lighter open and closed, and Dustin, who was pouting.

A blood curdling howl echoed outside the bus, and you nearly jumped out of your skin, letting out a small squeak.

Steve turned to you, eyebrow raised. "Easy, princess," he said, pushing himself up off the floor and looking out the window. You flicked him off even though both he and Dustin had their noses pressed up against the glass. You walked over to stand next to Dustin, peering out the bus' window.

There was nothing but mist. "This is really creepy," you murmured, and the boys, thankfully, ignored you.

"You see him?"

"No."

You could feel a bitter taste it he back of your throat. The same taste you got in your mouth when your mom sat you down after a particularly bad fight with your dad.

"Lucas, what's going on?" Dustin shouted next to your ear, and you flinched away, shooting him a glare. He probably couldn't see it in the dark.

"Hold on!" Lucas called back down. You waited one second. Two seconds Three– "I've got eyes. 10 o'clock. 10 o'clock!" his voice squeaked.

"There," Steve said, and your eyes followed his gaze.

Out of the mist crept a creature about the size of a dog. And that was where the similarities to any animal you'd ever seen before in your life ended.

It had no face. Just a hole which it inhaled the raw meat into.

The skin was odd, and it seemed more like it should be a frog's skin than a dog's even though it was clearly muscular.

"Eww," you murmured, unable to take your eyes off of it. Steve and Dustin snorted at you.

"What's he doing?" Dustin wondered.

"I don't know," Steve answered. Suddenly you wanted Max right by your side.

"He's not taking the bait. Why's he not taking the bait?" Steve's voice was frustratingly calm, even when his words weren't.

"Maybe he's not hungry," Dustin posed.

"Maybe the menu's not to his tastes," you joked. And then a thought hit you. Maybe the menu wasn't to his tastes. He ate cat. He ate cow. Maybe he was looking for something less hairy. Less tough. A little prettier. You bent over and picked up Steve's nail ridden bat.

"Woah, woah, woah, what do you think you're doing?" Steve asked, turning and grabbing your wrist.

"I'm expanding the menu," you replied, flippantly, attempting to yank your wrist back, but Steve's grip was too strong.

"Yeah, I don't think so. You'll get hurt," Steve pulled the bat from your grasp and released you.

"And what? You won't? Pretty sure neither of us are particularly prepared to go up against some gross space dog."

"It's not a space dog, it's interdimensional," Dustin corrected. Another howl echoed out and Steve looked out of the bus at the dog.

"You're staying here," Steve ordered, "Just, get ready." He tossed the lighter to you and left the bus.

Asshole.

"What's he doing?" Max asked, joining you and Dustin by the window. You wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

"Expanding the menu," Dustin murmured, stealing your joke. You shot another glare at him, and this time he had the decency to duck his head.

"Steve! Watch out!" Lucas' voice called from the top of the bus. You heard Steve call back a reply when a movement caught your eye, and your breath caught in your throat.

"3 o'clock! 3 o'clock!" Lucas squeaked out and you noticed as more interdimensional dogs crept closer to Steve. And then one lunged, and you gasped out, pulling away from the window as Steve swung his bat and flung himself over the hood of an old car. Dustin ran to the bus' door, pushing past you and screaming for Steve

"Abort! Abort! Steve, hurry!"

Steve was running back towards the bus and those things were hot on his tail, and even though he was an asshole, you couldn't help but scream for him to "RUN FASTER DICKHEAD!" Steve scrambled back onto the bus, pulling the doors closed, and then you heard glass shattering and you were screaming and Max was screaming. Lucas had climbed back down. You don't remember when that happened, but the three kids huddled by the ladder and away from the door. Good. Something hit the back of the bus, and a mouth snapped in. You pushed the kids out of your way, picking the pipe up from under the seat, and swung it, a nasty crack emitting from where you whacked the thing on the head. It pulled back.

The bus shook and then slowly, heavy footprints echoed down from the roof of the bus. You looked up and saw Max standing their wide-eyed looking up at the gaping hole in your fortifications. You flung yourself forward, scrambling up the ladder, pipe in hand.

"Y/N, no!" Max cried, but Lucas pulled her back, and Steve had just turned his head when you were already halfway up. The dog like creature hovered over you, opening its mouth, and a totally inappropriate thought entered your mind— aside from all of the teeth it looked a little bit like a flower.

"Y/N!" Steve called out to you, but you had already thrust your hand and pipe forward into its mouth and up, and the creature let out a screech as you pulled the pipe back, the end now wet. You shoved it forward again at the creature which was somehow still moving and then another howl echoed out and it turned its head, your pipe knocking into it and shoving the creature back a few steps. It scampered off and you remained, one hand gripping tight to the other and the other still holding the pipe high.

"Holy shit," Dustin swore, looking up at you.

"You took a few shaky steps down the ladder and turned to face the group, lowering the pipe.

"When the hell did you pick up a pipe?" Steve was looking at you wide-eyed, and you shook your head, brushing some hair that had fallen out of your ponytail back behind your ear.

You pushed over to the window and the group parted, letting you go. "We should follow them," you said. "Who knows what'll happen if they're heading into town." There was a general murmuring of assent as the group of you hurried off of the bus. Steve moved to the front of the kids, and you joined him, walking side by side: him walking with his bat sticking out of his backpack, and you with your pipe sticking out of yours.

He looked over to you as you passed the pile of uneaten meat.

"You're kind of a badass, aren't you?" Steve asked, quietly. You smiled at the slight awe in his voice and shrugged a shoulder.

"I told you," Max crossed her arms, smirking. "She's dangerous."

Read the Sequel

Tags: @lemonchapstick @loserrlauraa @pity-mee @imboredsueme @bands-and-shietz @panda0192 @daryldamnson @madhatterweasley @scintillllating  @loveforbrains @harringtonhuddle @siriusaccio @my-simple-musicalfan @loverskisses @adumbledorableee @hawkinsbabe @creamcheese783 @oomylifeiseternalsufferingoo @spacedoutsher @katethemandrake @disneykidafi @coolyoungbouquetdestinylove @myteenwolf-world @stay-wokke @eggshapeddank @lola-winston-harrington dontneedbiologytoadopt @upsidedownstevie @morgandakotaq

[8831blog]

My New Project

I own a lot of clothes. Clothes for days when I wanna look like Jem and the Holograms. Clothes for when I am so sad I have to wear something that feels like a giant fuzzy blanket to stop from sobbing in public. Clothes I wear when I want a whole room to look at me. Clothes I wear when I am absolutely not paying for drinks. Clothes for when I am the witch of the wood, tell Stevie Nicks to eat shit because actually I invented her look. I use all my clothes, shoes, accessories, and to inform whoever happens to look at me how I am feeling at that particular moment. Except for when I don’t.

Taking cute pics for Instagram

But anyway, I own a lot of clothes. Too many to properly count. And absolutely too many to ever wear. I have clothes from fifty pounds ago that I can’t bear to let go because I tell myself again that “I’m going to lose weight. I need to keep this”. I bought things that still have tags attached that I never even wore because I bought them without trying them on, or they were so cool I just HAD to have it, or I saw a cool way to wear it in my head, or it looks like something I saw in a magazine (yes, I still read and worship fashion magazine editorials like it's 2006). SImply, over the years I’ve hoarded quite a collection of stuff. And I use hoarded in the literal sense. I have boxes of stuff I don’t use or wear or have a place or even care for, because I say that I know it will be of use some day (plot twist 99% has never been). The mass of fashion items I’ve got is a problem for me and others!

Quite twisted at a party after working all day and pulling this outfit out of my ass

So here’s the project. I’m not going to stop buying clothes. I’m not going to Marie Kondo clean out my closet because I think everything in there does, in some form, give me joy. What I am going to do is wear every piece of clothing, every piece of jewelry, all my shoes, my bras, underwear, socks, all of it, and really truly examine why I’m holding on to it. Life is not just good or bad, happy or sad, black or white, and neither are my feelings about clothes. I am plus size (currently around a size 18, but can fluctuate from a size 14-22), 5”10 (six inches taller than the average american woman), so finding clothing that actually fits on my body is difficult. Finding items that fit my body well is another story. My body and self image are all over the place, and so is my mental health. Once upon a time I wore a steel boned corset for 10+ hours a day for six months until I could take 12 inches off my waist, but also I bought shirts I wanted to fit baggy but in reality they are too small now, or never fit in the first place. Basically, everything in my life is wildly, outlandishly,  inconsistent. Fashion is what I care about most, which brings me back to introducing my new project- wearing every item of clothing I own and deeply examining why I should keep it.  I have a whole closet, wardrobe rack, vintage armoire, and more full of 25 years of collecting. Truly, I own some cool shit. That corset I mentioned, a vintage beaded floor length gown in a size two I thrifted, stuff I found on the ground in New York City, things my friends made, my mom’s clothes, so much of my late dad's clothes, lots of stuff older than me, things that sold out instantly I managed to snag, its just endless. Actually, it's not- it just feels that way because I put so much emotional weight into fashion.

Middle of a shift at my nursing home job- no makeup and working eight days straight. Pre COVID so no mask!

If you’re still reading this, please follow my journey that starts with fabric, and ends I don’t know where. I do want to get rid of things (I need to get rid of stuff) but so much of it makes me “happy”. In this journey I am going to discuss how to properly dispose of clothing, how to tell if something fits right, make lots of fashion and film and pop culture references. I’m going to talk a lot about body image, gaining.losing weight. The fashion industry as a whole, my personal experiences and thoughts about the future. How it feels to be a woman, how it feels to be a plus size woman, how it feels to have  a perchant for black clothes, to love drama, to work twelve hour shifts in a nursing home, what it's like to NEVER PAY FULL PRICE BECAUSE PAYING FULL PRICE IS FOR S U C K E R S.I’m going to reminisce and fantasize. I’m going to examine the idea of perfection until it means nothing. I am going to show off but also be too vulnerable. I’m not going to stop buying clothes but hopefully I’ll get smarter at it. My name is Anna McCabe and this is what’s happening.

TL;DR: I’m going to try on all my clothes and decide if I like them and I’m going to tell you all about it. Prepare for lots of dirty mirror selfies.

Easter Sunday 2020 in a pandemic that I only dressed up for because my brother’s girlfriend wore a pretty dress and my mom made a comment about my pajamas

[artificialqueens]

Royals (A The Selection AU Fanfic) Chapter Five - TheQuartzMermaid

A/N: If you’re evil and you’re on the rise, you can count on the four Royals fans taking you down. ‘Cause we’re good and evil never beats us, we’ll read the fic and we’ll go out for pizzas! I am TheQuartzMermaid, Adore and Katya are meeting today, and if they don’t get along at first I’m sure they’ll find a way. That’s why the people on this blog believe in: Shadowcat204, whatevertrixya, Tiff, and Vixen! (and all the other people that liked/reblogged previous chapters but their names didn’t fit the parody: ummm3, thedevilstolemyobsession, civonumist, foolishfireworks, avocado-anxiety, marshallisnotinteresting, katyazamothunderfuck, teen8angel, xqueenchristinex, kaceykind3, superredhidinghood315, delano23me, achele-camren-real, shadows21233, roughfriend, snazzyjazzy617, pinkimperfectz, highclassdecadence, awk0beauts, sickening-kokes, Mistress, sdmn-af, zxldabxtch, therealdinkmunson, c-reep-s, and mr/mrs anonymous) THANKS FOR THE SUPPORT, I LOVE U GUYS A/N2: Do you wanna sing with me? Let’s start: I’m walking in like Blondie, a human ball of laundry…

Again, if you’re not familiar with The Selection, I highly recommend you to read the prologue for this fanfic. If you like it enough, you can read the original books by Kiera Cass, they’re amazing.

THE TIME HAS COME, FOR YOU TO READ THIS FIC, FOR… YOUR… LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFE!

Royals - Chapter Five (or The one in which two worlds collide - there are plenty of musical references in here, huh?)

“How can I say this without hurting your feelings, darling?” The platinum blonde girl who was taking care of Adore’s hair looked disappointed at that mess on her head. “Your hair is terrible.”

“Nevermind. Birds need a nest to hang out, don’t they?” Adore poked the funny bone of the hair stylish. “I believe you can save it, can’t you?”

“Well, it depends on what do you want to do with it. If you wanna be blonde like me or Miss Russia over there, I’d better shave your head and give you a wig.”

“No color change, thanks”, the Sonage Nightingale looked at her reflection in the mirror. Mom was right, Adore was really pretty with those green eyes and deep dark hair. “Actually, don’t change much. I want to keep my hair as dark as the core of my soul and as long as the list of Twos that wish they were me back in Sonage.” She chuckled. “Just make it less 'hi I slept with rats’ and more like 'hi I’m a Five who pretends to be a princess’, please.”

Alaska, the hair stylish, giggled. “You’re funny, Miss Adore. I’m already rooting for you.”

As Alaska started studying what she could do to Adore’s hair, the brunette’s gaze fell on the “Miss Russia” the stylish mentioned not long ago. She was sitting there, all smiles – and what a beautiful smile she had –, talking to a reporter. She recognized the blonde quickly, it was Yekaterina with the complicated last name, from Columbia.

The Five analyzed the girl. She was sit like a lady, wearing beautiful dress and shoes, very princess-like. Despite the royal aura she seemed to emanate, Yekaterina did look like a pleasant person to be around. Last thing Adore could see was she shaking the reporter’s hand before heading to another couch and talk to two girls: one had the smallest waist Adore’s ever seen and the other was a latin girl with a beautiful smile.

Alaska did do a miracle to that hair. Adore felt like she was one of those princesses from the stories Charlie used to tell her in her childhood. Her dark locks were now fluffy, shiny and wavy. Alaska even added little clips with pearls to avoid it from falling on Adore’s face.

“Oh my God, Alaska. Can you believe this shit?” The Selected was pleasantly surprised. The bad word didn’t seem to bother the blonde, who also seemed very proud of her work.

“I know, right, Adore Delano”, she replied. “Your hair looks so good… I love it.”

“I look fucking cool”, Adore said before getting up from her chair and hugging Alaska. “You’re a hero. Like, really. I don’t think there is a word to express how thankful I am.”

“Don’t say nothing, just send me flowers”, Alaska giggled. “Go on, Miss Adore. You still have makeup and nails to be done.”

She muttered another thank you before being led to the next station.

Unlike most of her fellow competitors, Adore payed attention to the names of every single person that crossed her way in this crazy journey. From George, the forms guy, to Bianca Del Rio, the woman that received her. From her fierce style manager, Raja, to the sweet girl who was now painting her nails, Kim. There was a man painting her face, but even though he said his name was Fame, that was not what a pin attached to his shirt’s pocket said. Adore respected that choice, though. If he says he’s Fame, then Fame he is.

“I have to say, your makeup didn’t suck for a Five”, Fame commented as he styled Adore’s eyebrows. “I’m trying to keep that style to what I’m doing.”

The girl just hummed. Mom and her couldn’t afford a makeup artist back in Sonage, so she had to learn how to beat a face by herself. Charlie taught her a few tricks too, but the techniques she used were mostly Adore’s.

After they got her ready, Raja reappeared, taking the Selected to a maze of racks and dresses. While the other girls had at least 6 different clothes, Adore only had one dress to her name. Raja seemed disappointed as she approached the girl.

“I’m deeply sorry, Miss Adore, but we weren’t expecting you until this morning” she didn’t sound condescending, if anything, she was frustrated. “We’ve only got your measures like, four hours ago and the maids only had time to sew one day dress. The queen herself went to buy some more so you can keep up to your competitors.”

“Oh, it’s okay. Thank you, Raja.” Adore flashed a sweet smile at Raja, who also offered her some shoes.

“Well, I think any of these will look fine. And don’t feel bad about your wardrobe, your maids are working on it. And about this dress…” her tone was very dreamy right now, “Prince Casey himself chose the fabric.”

Her heart felt a little warm as she got dressed. Just a look at the mirror and wow, do I really look that expensive? As she already expected, the reporters came to her and asked a bunch of questions on her look, her ideas on the other girls and her overall expectations about The Selection.

***

“Oh, there she is. The Replacement.” Violet rolled her eyes as she saw another black-haired girl come from the dressing rooms.

Katya didn’t even fight the urge to look. Damn, bitch was tall. And her dress was lovely: lilac with a white belt, short sleeves and some pearl details on the top part. She almost looked like royalty.

“What do you mean by replacement?” Violet’s new friend, Pearl, asked.

“A blonde smiley girl was picked from Sonage, but she broke the law and was disqualified”, the tiny-waisted model answered, matter-of-factly. “I heard somebody say the bitch lied on her form, and giving false information is indeed a crime.”

“I heard she was made an Eight and then they got 'The Replacement’ instead”, it was time for Ivy to talk about it.

“Lucky girl.” Pearl sighed.

The girl they were calling “The Replacement” was done with her interview now and chose a seat far away from every other girl in the room. As she passed by Katya’s group, the girl from Columbia could read the name on her pin: Adore.

How could a name fit it’s owner so perfectly? Adore didn’t have to open her mouth or do anything, but Katya was sure she was really adorable. And scared. Katya could sense that, she was really good at reading other people’s body language: Adore stared at the floor, only lifting her gaze to look around. She was really tall, but the way she was sit made her look really small. She looked at her nails and played with her hair. Her expression revealed she was kind of unsure about being there. And then Adore started looking around again, when her eyes met Katya’s.

The girl from Sonage tried to look away, but those blue eyes were kind of magnetic. It was Yekaterina, of course, Miss Russia. Why is she looking at me?, Adore thought. Does she think I’m some kind of aberration?

Suddenly, Adore thought the plant by her side looked extremely fascinating. Of course. The other girls were already talking about her, about how she wasn’t supposed to be here. Yekaterina was one of them, clearly. She was a Three, she had a “higher position” compared to Adore… Or so she thought she had. Adore was now a Three too, since she was one of the Selected. George said something about lower caste girls having some difficulties to go back to their previous lives after The Selection, so anyone below Three received Three status after being chosen. Simple as that.

Katya swears she heard something break when Adore looked away. Did I stare too much? Of course this wasn’t the main question in her head. Despite this feeling, she dared looking at Adore again, only to be interrupted by Bianca. Sadly, she didn’t pay attention to anything the older woman said after the “ladies” calling.

The question was still pulsing in her mind.

Did anyone notice?

[imaginingit]

surgeon!wonwoo

i suck balls at science and can’t remember anything at all from any of my classes but i think it’s one of the most interesting and unfathomable concepts in the world - and in my world, so does wonu so enJOY

wonwoo and his specs gave me this idea and it ki l l ed m e

so i knew i had to write a lil something abt it :-)

ok where do we start

remembered his mama camping out in the kitchen all the time and then heard the occasional “ah!” as she nipped her finger cutting some onions

and raced like usain freaking bolt to the medicine cabinet to reach the bandaids

and the look in her eyes when he quickly patched it onto her

it was just a bit of blood, but 4 year old!wonwoo was still hopped up on the high kitchen counter with one hand on his hip, the other wiping an imaginary sweat drop from his head, and gave a nice long “phew! you’re ok, ma! scared me there”

then proceeded to yell at her with his extremely not-deep-yet voice (om g can u imagine) for not being careful enough and interrupting his power ranger episode

but a few nipped fingers and a million thank-you smooches (“eW MOM gEt awAY i’m 4, i’m too old for kisses) later, jeon wonwoo decided to become a surgeon

bc how is it not cool to sew severed fingers back together???

so through elementary and junior high, he walked into science class everyday with a little hop in his step for his favourite subject and ready to learn about cells and mitochondrial functions and enigmas of the muscle and much more

until he discovered more than just sewing severed toes and ears back together

he remembered his 7th grade teacher talking about how the brain is the most powerful thing in the world, and just a simple nug to the head can send it all crashing down

he also went on to explain that the brain will never be a mystery solved, but those who try will never be short of acclaim

and since then, he delved into the world of neurology

by delved, i mean, dove the fuck into it, then drowned, then woke, then dove some more

through high school, he topped every single one of his bio classes and won every single science award in the school board

how????

HE’S A GENIUS

and also stays in on sunday afternoons to read his bio 4.6 textbook instead of sushi with friends

leading to best friend mingyu’s endless grumbling and whining that they never get to hang out anymore

meanwhile mingyu has his socks and sweaters and clothes all at wonwoo’s place; has a toothbrush there, buys food for his parents, uses the stove at wonwoo’s more than wonwoo does the pOINT IS HE BASICALLY LIVES WITH WONWOO

but everyone around wonwoo knows how much it means to him to be able to make this work

he marvels about science bc it’s a practicality but finds beauty in its enigma and endless endeavours of research and study

(jeon wonwoo is basically a nerd)

(but a hot one)

but yes, all his life, books, textbooks, textbooks, and books are all he’s known

so with all this accumulated knowledge he literally fucking powers through his undergrad and masters programs like.  .. … bruh

he then gets accepted into the second top med school in the country boY

and this was such an eye opening experience for him because as much as his undergrad and masters did for him with theoretical aspects of science, he finally got to do hands on experiments and witness clinical trials and watched a live!! open!! brain!! surgery!!

so finally he goes through his internship and residency for a few years at this amazing hospital in the heart of the city and has already become most renown neurosurgeon the hospital has seen in years despite his age

imagine little wonu in faded green scrubs, with a tiny notepad in his hand and occasionally pushing his glasses up his nose, as he scurries around with his resident trying to take notes during rounds

to this hot-ass, confident, head of neurosurgery surgeon that has nurses and residents (even interns and PATIENTS) slipping on their drool for him in his white coat and cerulean blue dress shirt, the top button left untouched (seungcheol had to slap his hand away multiple times during breakfast to keep him from trying to button it again)

but lbr he still trips over his laces bc he forgot to tie them before he left in the morning and buttons his dress shirt wrong under his white coat when coups doesn’t come in the morning to check up on his wardrobe choices for the day 

one time, accidentally brought mingyu’s grocery shopping list from his briefcase to the pharmacy rather than the prescription for ibruprofen for his patient jesus christ wonwoo

the point is, knowledge has always come easy for him, the other stuff have not 

,,,,,,and then there’s u

oh boy

science is ur nemesis

ultimate. nemesis.

the first time you ever stepped foot into your science class in the sixth grade, every word that came out of ur teacher’s mouth, to you, was just a complete ,,,, , , ,what??

and ur not stupid (actually very completely opposite), ur brain just physically, literally, cannot comprehend the concept of science

even if it may be so extremely fascinating to u, chem!!! physics!!!! and bio!!! are allergic to sticking to ur brain so u just learn to avoid science at. all. costs.

remember when i said that jeon wonwoo was a classic genius and a social termite like he’s so shy and weird around new people that he just deflects it at all costs?

WELL NOT YOU

so u went into journalism bc instead of memorizing formulas and using every unit of area in ur brain, ur communication is ur best friend

through high school and university, you were the campus butterfly

you knew everyone and everyone knew you, and any event that needed an mc? a motivational speaker? a presenter? that’s you!

you and best friend soonyoung always do those stuff together and you fell in love with the art of communicating, articulating, and analyzing information, all the while keeping the listeners intrigued and focused the entire time

but unfortunately the years after ur undergrad trying to look for gigs with ur firm has been extremely unsuccessful and it was to the point where u didn’t know if u wanted to stop this or continue bc it was just too low of a demand

until one day!

u come into ur office and find a piece of paper on the bulletin board talking about the new neural clinical trial happening at this huge hospital near u, and they were looking for someone to cover it!

and at first u were like um kk clinic? try? what?

but .2 seconds later it hits you that thERE’S AN OPEN OPPORTUNITY

and u vow to plow through it as boring as it may be, bc it’s been just sitting there and people haven’t signed up probably cause medical cases are usually a failure and such a bore to talk abt

you need this

so u quickly apply with all the info you need to and two days later, you’re stepping foot into this huge hospital and escorted to the neuro ward to get things started

when u get to the floor ur led by nurse!jeonghan to the head surgeon on this case

i think y’all know where this ish is going 

and jeonghan begins asking u a few questions abt the case, trying to gauge where you are with the info, and its safe to say u have nada dirt on this

so he laughs and begins to explain

this was the first clinical trial this hospital has done in 14 years, and despite being a renown teaching and surgical hospital, it has never quite reached its potential on the research aspect 

so the new head of neuro, dr. jeON, has decided to go forth with the new clinical trial (an experiment where those with the sickness subjected to the study will volunteer to be apart of the research, using themselves as a way to find a cure) for huntington’s disease, an inherited brain disorder that slowly deteriorates one’s ability to move, speak, function, as brain cells being to die off

he’s already got you so hooked on the case that you begin to wonder why no one at ur firm did an extra bit of research in the first place to snatch this gig 

but ur glad anyway CAUSE ITS NOW URS

u probably looked so flabbergasted and numbly excited that jeonghan mistook it for ur cluelessness and nerves, so he goes

“dw, it’ll be fine! dr. jeon here will walk through everything with you anyway, and you’ll basically be with him for the entire course of this trial to document everything, so tomorrow, just immediately head up here”

and knocks on the door labeled “dr. jeon wonwoo, ph.d, m.d., head of neurosurgery”

and for the head of neuro, for someone taking forth in an idea that hasn’t been touched in over a dozen years in such a renown hospital, you did not expect the door to be opened by a 

beautiful

human being 

his glasses sat perfectly atop his face as his sharp yet kind eyes rested upon urs 

and his white coat and black dress shirt today and nice slim pants and a pair of $200 light brown dress shoes bOI

and when he opens the door and finds ur mouth agape and eyes shining with excitement he feels like a leap in his chest 

like who is this beautiful person 

and he scolds himself, no wonwoo stop this nOW 

and he doesn’t know if it’s bc he hasn’t been on a date in like forever or if it was simply u

answer: it was simply u 

but we’ll get to that 

and jeonghan notices the tension so begins giggling and retreating from the scene

so wonwoo clears his throat when it’s just the two of you left

introduces himself and you m e l t bc

his........voice.................

and you stutter ur name and in his head he’s like o h m g what a pretty name what do i do with myself

so you enter his office and its surprisingly extremely tidy and put together for someone that probably has to worry about so much in a day 

and begins to talk about the case with you 

and remember the cute and stuttery person that opened the door to see u like 2 minutes ago

GOODBYE

bc here’s jeon wonwoo talking about science and his eyes light up brighter than anything you’ve ever seen

he talks about huntington’s first to give you a bit of background as to what it is, and then delves right into his plan

his hands begin to move with his words and he smiles when he begins to talk about how no one has attempted this before and maybe this could make a difference in this hospital, his career, and even medical history!!

and he kinda noticed you blanking when he talked about the logistics of the science so he kinda laughs to himself, knowing that science might not be ur thing

but for some reason, ur ok with science if u have this man talking to u abt it 24/7 ;)))))))

and u take notes on this and he notices ur pretty handwriting so gathers up his GODDAMN COURAGE to ask u a simple question

“so you’re a journalist?”

and u begin to tell him that you loved being able to tlak about something that reflected on someone’s experiences and share them with the world, just liek this one 

and he smiles and thanks u, knowing that it must have been difficult to agree to a medical case 

u assure him its no problem, meanwhile swooning over his s m i l e

and it’s only been like 30 minutes but u’ve already developed a crush like wow 

so for the first week, your conversations are a wholesome mixture of science, stutters, facepalming when u say something cringey and accidentally, and hoping to make the other laugh 

in the second week, you begin to meet the patients coming in, taking each of their stories and details with huntington’s 

and for the first time, you see how wonwoo interacts with his patients

and that crush that you developed become sso much more - you have this whole new found respect for him as a doctor

with care and intent, he asks his patients abt their day before going right into details of the treatment, knowing that all these people are doing his career a favour and the least he can do before they risk their lives into this experiment is at least be their friend

and even 70 year old women that can barely move anymore still manage to blush at the sound of his voice 

u see the way he holds their hand when he’s explaining the process and the courteous nod of his head as they talk to him and u know this man is more than just a surgeon and that he’s just an amazing human 

by the third week, your conversations have now transitioned to telling each other what u did last night and what ur planning for dinner tonight 

and u know to bring him coffee every morning now

the first time u did it, he legit had STARS in his eyes bc o mg u r so cute 

and u guessed it right the first time, that he liked his coffee black with just a dash of sugar

GET THE METAPHOR

by the end of the month, the more you learn about him, the more you’re amazed

you guys become closer and share the passion of wanting to help ppl in some way

and ur relationship now has become a complete budding and teasing relationship and there’s literally never a dull moment with u 

ur fav thing to do together is to do acrostic poems

u also take bets on who’s sleeping with who in the hospital

he always wins 

“its not fair u OBVIOUSLY know more abt them than i do!!!”

“hey babe, dont hate the player, hate the game”

and then u have to keep ur knees from buckling bc bABE ? ?? ? ?

the nurses always comment on how you’ve brought him so far out of his shell and he never really used to talk to anyone besides his patients, but he’s been treating his residents to dinner, helping the nurses out with the paperwork, and it’s only been happening since u came

and u r like

. . ,,, ?? me?

and they’re like yes! do u not notice how red he turns everytime u walk into the room?

you soon learn his favourite colour is blue

his favourite band is my chemical romance 

im kiddin g 

his best friend is mingyu and he’s a chef 

you learn that he has a younger brother and his first ever splurge was buying him and his parents a cottage by the ocean

also that he never really eats at home and he barely ever gets to go home bc of the gruelling hours and so he tends to just eat in his office before he checks up on his patients during night rounds 

you also learn that he’s having a housewarming party for his new condo this saturday and was wondering if yoU’D LIKE TO COME ALONG???

by this point, your research was mainly complete and you were a third finished with ur piece on this

so ur like y know what? SURE

and u try ur fucking best not to blush, but as you leave for the night, jeon wonu does a HUGE happy dance in his office before realizing that his walls and doors are glass and peopLE CAN SEE U WONWOO GODDAMn

but he texts u his address with a smirky face 

“jeon wonwoo why are u sending me a text w a smirky face” 

“idk that was my attempt to be cool did it work” 

“no”

“oh”

so it was ur day off on the day of his party and u know wonwoo doesn’t really throw stuff like this cause he only has a "small” group of friends

“it’s only gonna be u and my small group of friends”

“how small”

“well i grew up with these guys, there are abt 13 of us”

“THIRTEEN ISN’T SMALL”

and usually you’d be fine bc u have no problem meeting ppl but like these are wonwoo’s brothers???

you wanna try so hard to impress these people bc--

wait wonu isn’t ur bf??? WYD

SNAP OUT OF IT 

so u slap urself and then take like four hours to find the right outfit and do ur hair nicely 

and u show up in ur fav outfit and look bomb asf yas 

and he opens the door after u knock

and

oh

my

lord

he’s wearing a simple white t-shirt and ripped jeans 

jeon wonwoo

phd

md

head of neurosurgery 

in ripped jeans 

rip reader

and as u lose ur words, he also loses his and ur both just standing there clearly REALIZING THAT UR IN LOVE WITH THE OTHER PERSON AND THIS IS THE FIRST TIME YOU’VE EVER WORN ANYTHING OTHER THAN PROFESSIONAL CLOTHING AND WOW? SO? NICE?

so he snaps out of it bc yes i’m hosting this party thts right, and brings u inside 

you hear a bunch of exclaiming and hushing from inside the rooms and a lot of limbs knocking into the walls as 13 human beings sprint from inside of the condo to mEET THE JOURNALIST THAT JEON WONWOO HASN’T SHUT UP ABOUT IN TWO MONTHS 

and they all rush out and ur a bit overwhelmed but introduce urself and then scan through all the faces

you notice nurse!jeonghan, head of pediatrics!chan, his best friend, mingyu, and--

wait

“KWON SOONYOUNG???????”

yes ur best friend from uni also happens to have grown up in the same neighbourhood as surgeon jeon and u cant believe ur luck

so hoshi jumps out from the herd of men and tackles you with a hug and u can’t believe this until wonwoo explained he didn’t tell them ur name bc they would go crazy stalker-bitch mode, hence why they were so excited to meet u today 

so the rest of the night was spent with everyone being completely loud and tipsy and pushing the two of u together in an attempt to be slick they’re not 

and u see the bond that all the boys have and how boisterous wonwoo is around them too and u feel so lucky and ur heart is so full to witness a group of people truly in love and as close with one another 

so by the end of the night, as they all leave, soonyoung stops u at the door before he goes and tells u how happy he is that after losing touch post-uni, u’ve managed to bump into each other today again

but he also hugs u and tells u that wonwoo hasn’t shut up abt u 

and that he hasn’t been in touch with his brothers in a rlly long time bc of stress and anticipation with this new project

and that although wonwoo doesn’t do this much, he can tell that he’s super comfortable around u and that he seems to glow when he talks abt u 

and ur like omg s o noyougn  st op po

so after he leaves, you stay behind to help clean up 

but you’ve also decided

to confess

bc ur project is almost over and the paper is almost finished and ur ok with leaving on this note, regardless of if he reciprocates the feelings or not 

u just had to tell him, it was in ur nature to 

and u almsot back out but at the door, just as ur about to leave 

you were gonna say it 

and then 

his lips are on urs and god they’re soft and ur eyes just close immediately and his two hands cup ur face, intensifying the kiss, holding u up and taking up ur space as if he owns it and wow, it does things to u 

after what feels like an eternity, you part and u look at him with his swollen lips and rosy cheeks and glistening eyes and u almost cried right then adn there

bc wow ur in love with jeon wonwoo and u can’t believe u haven’t even told him that 

“i’ve been waiting to do that for so long”

“idiot, i was gonna confess first”

shrugs “i guess i just beat u in everything then”

that gets a smack on the head

until he asks u to stay the night and he can drive u both to work in the morning tomorrow and u agree bc how can u say no and so u end up staying over and wearing his sweater to bed and he lies there in bed literally hyperventilating bc SWEATERS ARE HIS WEAKNESS LIKE WHAT

so u drive into work the next morning with ur hands intertwined and in the corner of ur eye as ur walking in, u see head of pediatrics!chan slap a fifty dollar bill into nurse!jeonghan’s hands

so the rest of that month is spent going through with each patient and stealing chaste kisses in the x-ray viewing rooms and getting teased by everyone in the hospital 

even the patients 

until by the third month, the trial hits its first roadblock 

patient 04 had died on the table just as jeon wonwoo was inserting the second tube, and as surprised as u are that this was the first malfunction with the trial, it hits u nonetheless

hearing the news, u drop everything and go to his office after the surgery

this was the first taste of adversity in ur relationship too and u were curious to see as to how you guys were going to deal with this, esp since ur work was integrated into ur personal life 

but u walk in and there he is 

eating a freaking popsicle 

jeon wonwoo’s patient just died on the table and he’s in here eating ice cream

and u didn’t know if u were confused? angry? horrified?

and u close the door behind u as u walk in and draw the blinds for the glass walls and windows 

and as u turn around from doing that, he chucks the popsicle into the bin, walks up to you slowly and drops his head onto ur shoulder

you freeze, unsure if he’s crying or not, but u hear steady breathing and his arms slowly creeping around u and ur sure he isn’t 

but u can tell that he’s exhausted and scared, even if no words are shared between the two of u 

so you both stand there for god knows how long, holding each other, breathing each other in, releasing all tension and heartache from the day without a single word, just the sound of heartbeats and breathing 

until finally he lifts his head, eyes droopy and a small smile on his face, arms still around you, when u cup his face and tell him that ur so damn proud of him 

everything is going to hit a roadblock at some point, and this was bound to happen. we entered this knowing that it was science; anything can happen. just hang in there, wonu, we can do it 

and that was the first time wonu said i love u out loud 

and for all the people that doubted he was going to ever get a girlfriend with his head stuck in so many textbooks, it was the head stuck in the textbook method that even got him here to meet u in the first place SO SUCK IT

and so by the time u finish ur paper and the trial is reaching its end, there was a mixture of patients that successfully responded to the trial and those that didn’t make it 

but ur paper gets high acclaim from hospitals across the province for its research and editorial skills

and wonwoo received the highest achievement award from the board for his endeavours with the trial 

and after many long and gruelling months filled with work and chaste kisses here and there

you finally have time to take a seat and take in everything 

and marvel at wonu as a surgeon and as a human

bc how in the damn world did u ever get so lucky with science??

this,, ,, ,, is so long but enjoy bc i love jeon wonwoo 

:)