#mod note: shes trying so hard to keep everyone else safe

[arianagriand3]

Hello, it is nice to meet you.

- @ask-robot-grian

Ah! Hello there!! It's very lovely to meet you too! :]

I do recommend not getting too close though! I'd really hate if you got infected by the skulk too... It's a big enough problem as is!

[werenotadulting]

Routine Procedure - Finale

Author's note - Hope you enjoyed!

Part 7 - Kate

If you'd asked her, Kate wouldn't have been able to tell what exactly had gotten her interested in it.

Maybe it was the idea of the power dynamic. She had always been one of those girls labeled as 'bossy' growing up, which was a misogynistic way of saying that she wasn't afraid to speak up and speak her mind.

Or maybe it was the subversion of expectations of a traditional relationship that did it for her. The idea that she was the one in control, the one making all the decisions.

Maybe it was the fact that it was so taboo and kinky that appealed to her. It didnt really matter, whatever the reason.

Kate was into being a Mommy Domme, and Kate found nothing hotter than having a diapered little bitch boy to call her own.

The ultimate fantasy was teaching the boy to love and trust his diapers. Make him associate orgasming with wet diapers and diaper changes. Create a leaking "accident" in public so he learns that while thicker diapers might increase the risk of being noticed, they save you from the embarrassment of wet pants.

Of course, she had considered bringing up her desires to Mike, but based off of past experiences, she didn't want to chance it. Mike was just too perfect of a guy to risk blowing it like that.

She had always been the dominant one in bed, with Mike eagerly submitting to her every whim, so she knew they were sexually compatible. It had never gone past light bondage though, and Kate was starting to get an itch that handcuffs and blindfolds just wouldn't scratch.

────────

It had come up entirely by chance, one day while she was scrolling through an obscure ABDL forum.

The post read: "Biomedical engineer here, and I think I've figured out a way to induce instant, semi-permanent incontinence."

The post was over 3 days old, and only had two comments on it. The first was from a mod, basically saying to take everyone's posts with a grain of salt. The second was from the OP, about 24 hours after the original post.

"I know it sounds like a fantasy, but I'm pretty confident it will work. I've had a career in medical devices for the last 8 years, specializing in the urology space. I don't want to get too deep into the details on here, so just PM me of you're interested."

Kate rolled her eyes.

Everyone in this community is so hooked on the 'I want to be instantly incontinent' thing, and all it ever ends up being is some silly fap content, she thought to herself.

"You know what, let's feed the troll and see what bites," she muttered.

Liv2DomU: ok spill, what's your magical method?

PrinceOfPadding: this for you, or someone else?

Liv: hypothetically, let's say it's for a boyfriend

Prince: Ahh okay. Very interesting. Well, like I said, I've worked in med device for awhile, and I've recently started my own company. I primarily work in the urology space, catheters, scopes, that kind of stuff.

Liv: hmm hate to break it to u bud, but catheters kinda already exist

Prince: oh sure, catheters exist, but my idea is to bridge the catheter world with the stent world

Liv: sounds idk...sketchy? illegal?

As she read more, Kate was beginning to think that this guy might not be as full of crap as she had initially thought. He had his own start-up, which had already launched a Foley catheter to the market. It was all above-board and legit.

Prince: so, for the aspiring incontinent-person-to-be, the ring is positioned with a catheter, and stays in place once the Foley is removed. Then overtime, probably a month at minimum, depending on the chemical makeup and customer desire, the ring breaks down and is naturally absorbed into the body. And they all sign a consent form saying they accept the risks of such a procedure.

Liv: so then once it's dissolved they are back to being being able to control their bladder?

Prince: that's the theory, yes

Liv: theory?

Prince: well, dissolvable stent technology present state takes like 18 months to break down, and the manufacturing of it is patented and kept under lock and key

Liv: so basically all you have to offer is a catheter lol

Prince: well no. I've got some good leads on dissolvable compounds, but I've got to do trials of the rings first to see if it would even work. I've promised free diapers for the first few months if people sign up, but it's been hard to get subjects

Liv: so these trial rings wouldn't dissolve?

Prince: nope

Liv: meaning my hypothetical boyfriend would be....?

Prince: permanently diaper dependent, yeah

────────

In the end Kate was curious enough that she was willing to hear the guy out.

He'd asked for a mailing address and her phone number. The first was to send proof that his company was real, and the second was just to keep in contact should she decide to proceed.

It all made sense, at least in theory. Foley catheters were safe, provided they were inserted by a trained healthcare professional. A normal person would get a normal catheter just like everyone else. But an ABDL would be signing up for what was essentially an intentionally faulty catheter.

Assuming they knew they were willingly signing up for it.

When asked about 'accidental' ring implants, Prince had basically said, hey, people really need to learn to read the fine print.

────────

I walked out to the mailbox. I've been expecting test results back from the scan I'd had a few weeks back. Opening up the box, I noticed a large envelope with my hospital's address on the front.

About time, I thought, grabbing the envelope and the rest of the mail.

I walked back into the house, where Kate was making herself a cup of tea.

"Anything good in the mail?" she asked, taking a sip from her mug.

I listed them aloud as I started to flip though the mail, "Looks like some junk mail, an internet bill, a brochure for some UroVention medical thing, and last but not least, my test results."

I dropped the rest of the mail on the counter and started to open up my scan results. As I was reading, Kate walked over and began sorting through the other mail.

"Oh good, they said it's benign, but they're still worried about the location. They're recommending removal, just to be on the safe side."

"Removal for something benign? That sounds odd, but whatever," Kate said, tucking something into her back pocket.

"I'm not too worried. It sounds like it should be a pretty routine procedure."

────────

Part 8 - Mike

I sat down on the couch, my diaper squishing underneath me. Kate had taken to putting two stuffers in my diaper, even though these Tykables could already hold a lot. The warm, comforting feeling of my wet diaper started to turn me on, just like it did every time I realized how wet I was or if I was about to get a change. Not that I could do anything about it, though.

I flipped open the laptop and signed in. It would probably be a good hour before Kate got back from the store. Apparently I was being downgraded from sippy cups to bottles.

Once logged in, I noticed that the screen was still up to the site where Kate had last been. It was another diaper order, this time a case of Megamaxes. I felt my cheeks start to heat up, seeing that Kate had chosen the pink color for the whole case.

I opened up a private window, and navigated to KinkLink. My profile on here was pretty bare. It always had been, just containing my age, gender, and some basic interests. I hadn't even bothered to post a picture when I set it up. I preferred to look at other people's profiles rather than post things of my own.

I was always intrigued by people's locations and how close they were to where I lived. One such person who I came back to check the posts of daily was a mommy domme, who it happened lived in my town. Her first posts, from nearly three years ago, were what had first caught my attention.

'Every night I dream about finding my perfect diaper slut. He will wake up to me rubbing his thick, soggy padding, the little bedwetter that I turned him into.'

'Picture this: You, in a wet diaper and nothing else. Me, in my black lingerie with a strap on. Do I have any volunteers?'

'Have no doubt, if you date me, it's diapers forever. There's no "only at home" or "but my parents are coming over". Maybe I'll just find a way to make you incontinent. Then you won't have an excuse.'

And then there were the pictures. She never would show her face, but she didn't need to.. She wasn't lying about the black lingerie. It left very little to the imagination. Then the next picture, where the bra came off, and she was just in her lacy panties, her pierced nipples and tattoos on display. Maybe it was the octopus tattoo on her arm, my favorite animal, that made her stick out to me.

But there was one post that I always came back to and was entranced by. It was a picture of her holding an ABU Kiddo, right below her breasts. She wasn't wearing any clothing.

'Aww baby, did you wet the bed? I think we should probably put you in some protection.'

────────

I stood in line at the coffee shop. It wasn't too busy for a Tuesday at 9 a.m., only two people were ahead of me. As the first person in line got her coffee and the second lady stepped up to place her order, I checked my phone. Still a half hour before I needed to be at work, I had some time to sit and enjoy my drink. I got my usual and went off to a booth in the corner.

"Excuse me, but do you happen to know what the Wi-Fi password is here?"

I looked up to see the woman who had been in front of me in line.

"Oh um, yeah it's....oh I think they just changed it. Try 'PINTO'. They always pick some sort of bean, I think they find it amusing, but it's never a coffee bean..." I trailed off.

She smiled, "Oh thank you so much, yeah I'll try that."

My mouth fell open is shock.

"I uhhh...I like your tattoo," I said. "They're my, um, favorite animal."

"Oh mine too! Isn't the octopus, like, the coolest animal?"

"D-definitely. Hey, would you like to sit with me? I'm just hanging out while I wait for work. My name is Mike by the way."

"That sounds really nice. Thank you, Mike. I'm Kate."

[thetorchwoodarchive]

Gwen Focused Stories as Submitted by the Mods and Users of the Torchwood Archive

Everyone! Thank you so much for your submissions! Recs are under the cut!

As always, please mind the warnings and ratings listed on each individual story. 

Feel free to reblog with additions!

Something Beautiful by Cyus (Gen | complete | 4,500 | PG)

After Torchwood, after Jack, Gwen lives her life, even as Jack comes back.

Domestic Disharmony by thirteeninafez (JackIanto, GwenRhys, Gwen&Ianto, Gwen&Jack | complete | 3163 | G)

In which Jack and Gwen get stuck in the Archives and discuss green milk, thermostats and Ianto Jones.

Side Note by Aliciajazmin (Gwen&Ianto | complete | 1027 | T)

A few months after her best friend's funeral, Gwen runs into Rhiannon while grocery shopping. Ianto's sister has some questions and Gwen has some things she needs to say to her.

Inevitability (and other hard truths) by violetmessages (Gwen&Ianto | complete | 1236 | T)

There's a clock ticking down at Torchwood, and Gwen realizes she's the only one who hears it.

All Around Me are Familiar Faces by gwendolyncooper (Gwen&Ianto, JackIanto, GwenRhys | complete | 2602 | G)

Gwen Cooper wakes up in Jack Harkness' bed. Ianto Jones wakes up in Rhys Williams'. And they find themselves in each other's bodies. As close as they are, this might be a level too deep in their friendship.

Blueberry Knees by Violetmessages (Gwen&Ianto, JackIanto, GwenRhys | complete | 3878 | T)

If Ianto thought about it, the way Gwen’s illness progressed was rather like falling asleep. Slowly and surely, but then all at once.

He hadn’t noticed it at first - he still loathed himself for not recognizing that something might be wrong. But he hadn’t, no one had, so it slipped through, like little crumbs falling between the crack of their ancient sofa.

And there was nothing to be done about it.

Power Struggle by Prochytes (GwenTosh, Gen | complete | 1416 | T)

How Gwen ended up in charge by the start of Season Two, based on the premise that one should never assume Jack Harkness is joking.

Bad at Communication by engagemythrusters (JackIanto | complete | 1740 | G)

In which Gwen visits a hospital, where Jack and Ianto, respectively tired and high, are complete idiots.

The Hands on the Clock Keep on Ticking by Violetmessages (Gwen&Ianto | complete | 10235 | M)

They all knew it could happen to anyone. They’d all seen the proof. Even if it happened to a miniscule amount of the population, it was still a possibility.

But they had grown complacent. They had forgotten that they too were also at the mercy of the Rift, that the Rift did not make an exception for those who knew its existence.

They had forgotten until they were faced with it themselves.

In which Gwen and Ianto get sent back to 1969 by the Rift.

Pastries, Avoidance Tactics, and a Bottle of Scotch by pocky_slash (Gwen&Ianto, GwenRhys, JackIanto | 6220 | G)

In which Gwen said something she regrets, Ianto makes a poor dinner choice, Rhys offers sound advice, and Jack has a key. A different sort of "Meat" post-ep.

Children, Daleks and Mopeds: How Gwen Cooper Got Her Groove Back by paycheckgurl (Gwen&Jack, GwenRhys | complete |  9603 | T)

Following a disastrous shopping trip that put her at the center of an explosion, Gwen finds a little alien boy.

Or: The series of events in which Gwen acquired another child, had a much needed conversation with Jack, bought a moped, defeated a Dalek with a boxing glove, and learned that loving yourself and saving the world don’t need to be mutually exclusive.

A coda to Revolution of the Daleks where I explain why Gwen has a son all of a sudden.

I Don’t Know What to Think by  aliciajazmin (GwenTosh | complete | 2637 | T)

Gwen and Tosh travel with the Doctor through time and space, taking a break from Torchwood. Gwen decides to bring along her pet rat Owen (not to be confused with Human Owen). Also, Gwen and Tosh are desperately in love with each other.

Lost Inside by Xennon (Gen | complete |  36,642 | T)

The team go in search of some smugglers.

A Vision Too Removed to Mention by Pocky_Slash (Gwen&Ianto | complete |  13920 | T)

In which Ianto is stuck in a time loop that feels more like hell.

Club Wales by Pocky_Slash (Gwen&Ianto | Series |  69,530 | G-T)

 In the wake of Jack's disappearance, Gwen finds comfort in a new friendship with Ianto. Gossip, bonding, and other hijinks of understanding ensue.

To the Waters and the Wilds by Violetmessages (GwenTosh, JackIanto | complete | 13190 | T)

“Beautiful, isn’t it?”

Tosh whirled around. She’d thought she was alone, she’d expected it.

Then she locked eyes with the most beautiful woman she’d ever seen, a woman who seemed to radiate an ethereal glow, a woman that emanated an otherworldly light.

Cold Pizza by  Eberesche (GwenRhys, Gwen&Ianto | complete | 4767 | T)

With Jack missing and the Rift running the team ragged, Gwen's plans for a single night in are foiled.

Safe by DinoDina (GwenToshRhys, GwenRhys | complete |  1191 | G)

After the cannibals, Gwen doesn't go home with Owen. She rides back to Cardiff — back to Rhys — in an ambulance with Tosh.

Dead on Arrival by violetmessages (JackIanto, GwenRhys | complete | 13582 | M)

Ianto Jones wakes up. The only problem is, he's certain he was dead.

You Won’t Be Seeing Us Today (You Won’t Be Seeing Us in Hell) by Beleriandings (GwenRhys, JackIanto, Gwen&Ianto | complete | 11141 | T)

One day, Syriath took Gwen's voice. She should have realised Gwen wouldn't stand for that.

Girly Night In by Mathemagician (GwenTosh | complete | 1088 | T)

The girls and Ianto have a night in. Gwen figures something out about herself.

For the Torchwood Femslash Fest prompt "Sexual Identity"

This Earth is Empty Without You (But the Grave is Not) by violetmessages (Gwen&Ianto, GwenRhys, JackIanto | complete | 1036 | G)

Ianto Jones' funeral happens on a perfectly sunny day. Gwen hates every minute of it.

In a Polaroid Picture by innocent_until_proven_geeky (GwenTosh, GwenRhys, Gwen&Jack | complete | 2176 | G)

Gwen finds a photo of her and Tosh, and remembers.

Exit Protocol by Beleriandings (GwenTosh | complete | 6139 | G)

Not long after the deaths of Tosh and Owen, Gwen gets a message from an unnamed user on the Hub system. That really shouldn't happen. And yet, there it is.

To the Sticking Place by zephyras (JackIanto, GwenRhys, OwenTosh, MarthaMickey | complete |  96433 | M)

The end justifies the means. Failure is not an option. There is always a choice, except when there isn't. These are the phrases Ianto Jones lives by and he refuses to allow anyone, even Captain Jack Harkness, to change that. Jack/Ianto, AU, Torchwood One Agent!Ianto.

These Happy Days by Violetmessages (GwenRhys, JackIanto, Gwen&Ianto, GwenJackIantoRhys | series |  16,777 | G-T)

A series of non-chronological stories in which Ianto miraculously survives CoE in some fashion and Torchwood Three (plus Rhys and Anwen) settle down near the seaside.

Piece it Together by Beleriandings (JackIato, Gwen&Ianto | complete |  3442 | T)

Gwen realises that for all they talk, she's never asked Ianto about how he and Jack got together before. The answer is a lot more complicated than she was expecting.

Respite by Beleriandings (Gwen&Ianto, JackIanto, GwenRhys | complete |  2590 | G)

Even by their usual standards, Gwen thought it was absolutely fair to say it had been a rough week.

Dancing in the Midnight Garden by Fionn_sgeul (Gen | complete |  17660 | G)

In which Gwyneth the Maid and Gwen Cooper are the same person, Jack meets someone else whose life was completely turned around by the Doctor, and Torchwood is invaded by garden gnomes

Don’t You Know For Years You’ve Haunted Me by Virtualsilver (GwenRhys, JackIanto | complete | 12083 | T)

Gwen has inherited a recessive trait that has lurked in her ancestors' blood for generations: she is prescient. She can see flashes of where the timeline is heading and can feel when something - or someone - changes it.

She tries to use her foreknowledge to change events for the better, but securing the outcome of her interventions proves to be a challenge.

He Really Loves That Coat by DracoPendragon (JackIanto | complete | 585 | G)

It was quiet when Gwen entered the Hub that Monday morning. And the sight that greeted her was not one she’d expected, but wasn't one she minded seeing.

Sink Your Feet into the Mud (and I’ll Return) by violetmessages (Gwen&Ianto, GwenRhys, JackIanto | complete | 3404 | G)

What if she could bring Ianto back?

It’s a dangerous idea. It’s got the potential to be catastrophic. But Gwen is all out of options. She’s surrounded by the graves of the people she loves, abandoned, save for her husband, and she refuses to let her best friend go without a fight.

Painted in the Sand (To be Washed Away) by moonlightrhosyn (Gwen&Ianto, GwenRhys | complete | 1992 | T)

Gwen could still see their bodies every time she closed her eyes.

This is Me Trying by gwendolyncooper (GwenRhys, Gwen&Tosh, GwenOwen | WIP | 2524 | T)

“Sometimes you do stupid things to try and cope, to get a sense of normalcy, to make all this chaos and the Rift and space and aliens and the things we see make sense. Stupid, horrible things that should never have happened, and they come back ‘round to bite you again, and--” “What happened, Gwen?” Tosh’s prodding is soft and careful, but it speaks the glaring truth they both know - Gwen is stalling, talking around the issue at hand. Verdant eyes flash upwards with a startling intensity now, wide and filling with unshed tears again, the special agent’s plush lips pressed into a trembling line as she attempts to retain a semblance of control over her emotions. “I told Rhys about Owen.”

Fourty-Eight Hour Stand-Down by pocky_slash (JackIanto, GwenRhys | complete | 2740 | G)

"You and Ianto had a domestic," Gwen guesses. Jack scowls at her. In which Jack is kicked out, Gwen just wants a night off, Rhys buys milk, and Ianto clears table space.

Ret-comp (Retroactive Compensation) by reiley (LisaIanto | complete | 499 | T)

The phone. The one that could call any place or any time in the whole universe. The one Jack had locked away and warned them all that it was never to be used.

Any Other Day by Amand_R (JackIanto, JackGwen, GwenRhys | complete | 84055 | complete| NR) 

Hey, this one time? At Torchwood? Gwen and Jack switched bodies and everything went pear-shaped.

Space Tripping (in spaaaaace!) by Princessoftheworlds (JackIanto, IantoOther, GwenRhys, Gwen&Ianto | complete |  5115 |T)

Gwen and Ianto road trip across space - space trip, get high, shop, have a light existential crisis, face grief, and get massages - not all necessarily in that order.

Empty Chairs by princessoftheworlds (Gwen&Ianto | complete | 412 | G)

Gwen tends to Ianto's wound.

Forever, And What Comes After by Violetmessages (JackIanto, GwenRhys | Complete | 10028 | T)

“Hm, imagine if they did,” Ianto said. “Torchwood would have to come out of retirement.”

In which Gwen and Ianto relax at a spa, Jack and Rhys attempt bad science, and Anwen is just along for the ride.

One In The Same by Violetmessages (Gwen&Ianto, GwenRhys | Complete | 1638 | T)

Ianto, Gwen thinks. Her best friend would never turn her away, and maybe she can sleep on his couch for the night. Perhaps by the morning she’ll be okay again.

Wastin’ Away In Margaritaville by Paycheckgurl (Gwen&Ianto, JackIanto, GwenRhys, Gwen&Jack | Complete | 1419 | T)

Jack’s bad coping mechanism is agreeing to be a surrogate for an alien spawn baby. Gwen’s is at the bottom of a bottle.

Big Finish: Expectant from Gwen’s POV

[tedesquire]

We do need more fics/headcannons for our favorite cherub, Bill! Maybe it could involve him figuring out how to ask the reader out? Or going to see a concert with him? Or anything spicy 🌶🥺

When It’s Love

[This may not be exactly what the dear anon had in mind but it’s what I felt inspired to write. Obviously you can request another Bill/Reader if you want something a little bit different!

I was definitely inspired by Pride and Prejudice, Emma, the above picture, Van Halen, and one scene in “10 Things I Hate About You” (Mod Olivia)]

_______________________________________________________________

Study hall was as lively as ever. Cheerleaders sat in the back to expose their peers to the unpleasant smell of nail polish and snapping sounds of gum. Papers rustled as the jocks passed notes back and forth with crude drawings and curse words. Every so often Ms. Ritcher would loudly clear her throat, tipping the edge of her cat-eye glasses and letting her milky eyes glaze over the classroom to make sure no one was speaking or getting up to any mischief. 

Despite these distractions, you found yourself in your own little bubble, eyes rapidly racing back and forth as you read.  

You enjoyed your copy of Pride and Prejudice so often that the edges of the pages had started to fray and the spine was one drop away from crumbling. 

“In vain I have struggled. It will not do. My feelings will not be repressed. You must allow me to tell you how ardently I admire and love you.” You mouthed the words, sighing forlornly. Your eyes fluttered shut and you pushed the book against your chest. Your heart seemed to ache, as if you were looking at the words for the first time.

You shook your head and opened the book once more to continue, unaware of the eyes that lingered on your figure.

“We’re still on for Friday, right? I looked at the TV Guide for this week and Eddie Van Halen is scheduled to appear on Letterman. It will be most triumphant!” Ted Logan slyly whispered to Bill, his eyes trained on Ritcher’s figure to make sure he wouldn’t be caught. Bill’s brown orbs didn’t leave your face, particularly interested in the way you were biting your bottom lip.

“Uh, yeah.” Bill whispered, not fully knowing what Ted had just asked.

“What would you think if I grew my hair out like Van Halen? It might help in our conquest to get him on lead guitar.”

“Mm-hmm.” Bill mumbled. 

Ted’s brows furrowed and he let his gaze stray from their teacher to look at Bill directly. He knew if Bill were paying more attention he would have acted more excited.

Much to Ted’s amusement, his friend had once again taken up his recent pastime of staring at you and tuning everyone else out. He decided to press Bill’s buttons, an impish grin forming on his face.

“Actually, I think it would be most foolish to try and copy Van Halen. Perhaps I should shave all my hair off?”

“Sounds good, man.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I mean, who even likes Van Halen? Kind of a has-been, right Bill?”

“Oh yeah.” A glimmer of fondness grew in Bill’s eyes as he watched your brows knit in concentration.

“Y/n’s pretty hot. Do you think she’d say yes if I asked her to prom?”

Bill nodded, ears perking when he heard your name. He mentally repeated what Ted had just asked him, letting the true weight of his friends words hit him. A blush crept up his neck, finally meeting Ted’s gaze.

“Staring at y/n again, hm? You’re lucky she’s always reading or she might think you were a creep.”

“Shut up, Ted.” Bill hissed.

“Keep it down, gentlemen.” Ritcher’s gravelly voice interrupted the quiet atmosphere, causing their conversation to end.

After a few moments, Ted deemed it safe to speak once more. “Bill, we’re about to be the biggest rock stars San Dimas has ever witnessed. Why don’t you talk to her? The fall formal is coming up.” He suggested, nudging Bill’s side eagerly.

“Ted, if you have not been made aware, Y/n is notorious for turning men down. I wouldn’t stand a chance.”

“You never know if you don’t ask!” He encouraged, trying to stay upbeat as Bill frowned. He opened his mouth to argue when the bell interrupted. 

Ted quickly sprang up, giving Bill no time to follow. The taller boy pretended to trip against your desk, causing your thermos to hit the tile loudly. He muttered an apology before turning around, gesturing between you and Bill.

The impact of the thermos caused you to snap out of your reverie, and you were surprised to find people exiting the classroom, heading to their next period. 

“Hey,” A soft voice called to you. You turned to meet the owner, only to be met with your thermos. “I apologize for Ted’s behavior, it was most heinous.” You accepted the bottle, finally looking up to see your classmate, Bill. 

“I didn’t even realize he had knocked it over, it’s alright. Thanks, Bill.” You smiled politely, grabbing your bag and starting to head out the door.

Your smile made Bill’s knees wobble, and now that he had your attention, he was not so eager to lose it. “So, uh, what’s in the thermos?” He asked, trailing behind you. You slowed down, letting him fall into step with you. 

“Oh, this? It’s tea. Green tea with lemon.” Bill blinked in surprise. 

“Are you sick? Granny Preston seems to drink that when she’s under the weather.” He tried not to seem too desperate in continuing the conversation with you.

“No.” You chuckled under your breath. “I just like it. It’s also good for your vocal chords.”

“Most excellent!” His grin did well to cover the panic he felt inside. “So um, I noticed your book. It’s uh- it’s my favorite.” You couldn’t stop the laugh that escaped you.

“You like Pride and Prejudice?” Your humorous expression faded as you noticed Bill blushing. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh. It’s just, I don’t think I’ve ever met a guy who’s read Austen novels willingly.”

“That’s where you’re wrong!” Bill lied, heart racing erratically. “I love Austen. He’s one stellar dude, dude.” You shook your head, approaching your next class.

“Austen isn’t a dude, dude.” You tsked. “Jane Austen is the author of Pride and Prejudice, your favorite book, as you claimed.” You gestured to your class. “This is my stop. I’ll uh, see you later Bill.” 

The smile Bill so proudly wore a moment ago faded, replaced with sheer embarrassment. The beginning bell rang, signaling class had started. 

He blew it. The one chance he had to talk to you and he had managed to make an absolute fool of himself. 

His cheeks were still stained red as he strolled into History class, late, much to the annoyance of Mr. Ryan. Ted beamed at him, excitedly leaning forward as Bill sat down.

“Dude! How’d it go?”

“Shut up, Ted.”

-

Bill huffed for the third time in the past twenty minutes, prompting a look from Ted.

It had been an unusually quiet lunch, Ted slightly freaked out that Bill was reading a book that was neither assigned in a class or a textbook. 

After the disastrous conversation that occurred between you and Bill, he had asked his stepmom to drive him to the library, mumbling a lie about an English class assignment to prevent her from asking any questions. He was now in possession of Pride and Prejudice, but the only problem was, he was having a hard time understanding what the hell was going on in the book. 

“What does it say?” Ted asked, hoping he could help but knowing he probably wouldn’t be able to provide a satisfactory answer. 

“The book keeps mentioning this place called ‘Netherfield’, which is confusing since the book takes place in this town called Meryton, I think, so it can’t be another city, can it?” Ted shrugged, slightly embarrassed he could not help his friend. 

Ted surveyed the cafeteria, finding you tucked in the corner reading, as usual. An idea formed in his mind and he stood, making his way over to you.

Bill was too busy trying to re-read the paragraph he had been trying to decipher for an hour to notice Ted’s absence at first, but upon opening his mouth to complain again and not seeing Ted’s friendly presence, he searched frantically for the familiar figure.

“Oh no, Ted you moron!” Bill huffed, cheeks heating as he watched the interaction between you and Ted. You seemed skeptical at first, but soon your eyes found Bill’s, prompting him to turn away once more, praying for Ted to return.

“Can I sit here?” You startled Bill, who jumped at the sound of your voice. He avoided your eyes, clutching his book tightly.

“Are you sure you want to?” You took that as the closest to a yes and plopped beside the blonde. Ted was nowhere to be found.

“Ted told me. He said your dad was a hard-ass and wanted you to get caught up on some summer reading list. You were just trying to ask me to help you interpret the book and I made fun of you, I’m sorry.” Bill looked lost. His dad was certainly not a hard-ass by any means. In fact, he bet that his dad wouldn’t care if he had to repeat high school just as long as he stayed out of him and Missy’s way. Realization seemed to dawn on him. It was merely a ruse Ted had made up to get you to talk to him. 

“Oh um, yeah! My dad is strict, most abominable. He wants me to read this, but I’m having trouble understanding some things.” This entire book, he had wanted to say, but held his tongue. “I noticed you reading it and thought you would be willing to help me.”

“Yeah!” You nodded enthusiastically. “P&P is one of my favorite books of all time. Jane Austen writes so perfectly, I feel as if I’m in the story itself with the way she paints the scenery.” You continued to coo, and Bill felt his nerves start to melt away.

Ted stood at the back of the cafeteria, out of plain sight to watch you and Bill, a smile overtaking his boyish features. 

Bill so owed him a slurpee. 

-

“So, why is it you like Jane Austen so much?” You and Bill had been spending every lunch period together for the past week and had finally decided to meet up after school at a park not too very far away from San Dimas High. 

At first, all your conversations had been about Pride and Prejudice, but as you started to spend more time with the boy, you found yourself oddly entranced by his weirdly polite mannerisms and goofy grin, and thus your conversations ranged from your favorite music, to plans after high school, and whether or not Ms. Richter needed new glasses. 

The California sun seemed to be suiting him well, making his curls seem as if they were crafted from liquid gold itself, but if anyone were to ask, you could very well say you didn’t seem to notice. 

“Well, it’s not just that I enjoy Jane Austen and her works. I love everything about the 18th/19th century.” You put down your copy of Emma to fully meet his stare.

“Pardon me, but I do not believe they had indoor plumbing dating back then.” Bill mischievously grinned and you laughed, playfully rolling your eyes and nudging his elbow softly.

“Okay, okay, almost everything.” You inhaled deeply. “I mean mostly the whole… aesthetic of it all. The gowns, the gloves, the candles, handwritten love letters, wax seals, the ascots, tall hats, the stocking the men wore, the balls- oh! especially those. I mean, we have the stupid formals and all, but I can’t very well wear a gown to those, can I?” 

“The tea?” He offered, admiring the passion you held.

“The tea!” You confirmed. “And back then, true love was so rare, y’know? I mean, Jane and Bingley were in love with each other the minute they met at the ball but they didn’t get married for so long! And take Darcy and Elizabeth, or Knightley and Emma! Their love wasn’t at first sight but it grew and grew until the men couldn’t stand to stay silent about it any longer. Nowadays men consider peak romance to be a night on the beach with a towel and a few beers.” Bill watched as your nose wrinkled in disgust. 

“Every single guy is looking for their Molly Ringwald or just another pretty face. No guy is interested in a “Elizabeth Bennett”. At least, not ones our age.” You sighed. Bill nodded in understanding.

So that’s why you rejected every guy who asked you out. You wanted romance and you deserved it! 

Bill’s heart beat so loudly in his chest he was sure you could hear it through his ribcage, swallowing thickly as he tried to come up with something to say other than, “I think I’m in love with you”. 

“Wouldn’t that be something though, wearing a ballgown to a school dance.” You snickered, too lost in your own amusement to notice Bill’s eyes glazing over, a most excellent plan forming in his head. 

-

Loud, thumping bass and whirling neon lights seemed to overtake your every sense. You were currently standing in the middle of the gymnasium, half your classmates dancing wildly, the other sending you strange looks. 

You had told yourself you weren’t going to the formal, content to rent a few VHS’s from the local Family Video and spend a night by yourself, but that was before you received the letter.

Upon opening your locker the other day, you were surprised to find a white dress of Italian crape over a white satin slip stuffed carefully inside. Silver thread laced the bodice and the bottom of the slip with a silver ribbon tied around the waist to match. 

A slip of paper was pinned to the fabric, reading:

“O fair one.

Join me at the Formal.

I will be waiting.

Love, 

Fitzwilliam Darcy.”

You had no idea who could have sent it and debated about staying home anyway, but your curiosity overtook you. Surely someone who had put the time and effort to notice your interest in the regency era and buy you a dress was worth facing ridicule; however, you were starting to get impatient.

You managed to convince your mother to borrow a pair of her pearls to accompany the dress and spent two hours styling your hair the exact way you wanted to. The only exception to your outfit were the modern silver shoes you wore, but you felt beautiful nonetheless.

You looked around the gymnasium once more, straining your neck to find anyone wearing a suit, or at least a button up, for heaven’s sake, but to no avail. Perhaps it was time to cut your losses and head home. 

You turned towards the entrance, disappointment creeping into every pore when you noticed a man stepping into the gym nervously. 

You first noticed the freshly-polished, ebony shoes, eyes trailing up to the cream stockings that ended just below the knee where matching black knickers began. The man wore a plaid, crimson vest underneath a warm, brown waistcoat. A ruffled, ivory button up and matching cravat were the last ornaments he wore, and you found yourself speechless. 

Your eyes finally met the face of the man who had won you over. This time it was your turn to blush, the rich, familiar eyes taking in your figure as they had done so many times before. 

“Bill…” You whispered, finding yourself at a complete loss for words.

“You can call me William, if you’d like. Just you though.” He smiled, extending his hand. 

“I can’t believe you did all of this… for me… I-”

“You deserve it. Every bit of it. I know your expectations of guys are pretty low and rightfully so. You don’t need to change who you are or what you like to please anyone else but yourself. I think you’re pretty radical the way you are and uh... I’ve liked you, for a while, actually. Ted told you about some summer reading list when the truth was I just wanted to read Pride and Prejudice as a way to talk to you.” Your blush deepened, truly taken aback by the confession. You never believed that anyone would be able to offer you a night like this. 

“So… perhaps that wasn’t as romantic as Darcy’s confession and all but I stand by it. And now I only have one question to ask you: May I have this dance?” His hand was still outstretched towards you. You slid your palm against his without hesitation, letting his arm wrap around your waist.

Of course the tune of “Girls on Film” by Duran Duran wasn’t a slow song by any means, but that didn’t stop the two of you from slowly spinning around the wooden floor. Your eyes couldn’t seem to leave his and you couldn’t feel the ache in your cheeks from your wide smile.

Later on in the night you two were able to jump and headbang to classic hits, because you didn’t expect Bill to change who he was for you either. 

You found yourself extremely fond of each curl of his that bounced from his forehead, the glint of happiness in his eyes, and each smile he sent your way. You were convinced that neither Jane Austen herself or any of the female protagonists she created were ever as happy as you were with Bill that night.

FINIS.

[border-spam]

Troy HC dump

These span all eras and are valid for the Troy I write , some are 18+ so read more at your discretion:

Hugely into any puzzle / collection echo games (think puzzle and dragons), and uses them to relax very often in private. Finds puzzle games really destress him and help him sleep. Has spent an insane amount of money in them.

Keeps his own personal coffers and the amount he spends wouldn’t even be noticeable against his almost infinite wealth , but he’d be intensely embarrassed if anyone found out how much God King Calypso spends on gatchas.

Hair is naturally very thick, his iconic hairstyle was originally born out of frustration after going for a bandit mohawk, realising how much work that was going to be every day, then swiping it all forwards and hoping for the best.

Has v little torso hair but does pluck the patchy little bits he grows for the aesthetic, bitch.

Incredibly hygienic for a Pandoran, but more so with his oral hygiene than anything else. Had to keep a rigorous cleansing routine for the first few months after his jaw mod and just kept it up from then on.

Understands a huge amount of different languages, but not fluently. Leda taught him the basics of a lot of language cores and he can understand and read a lot relatively well. Cant speak or write them though, and keeps this skill close to his chest.

He’s intensely clever and realised early how useful it was to understand what sponsors were saying to each other in “private” by using another language during meetings with the twins. He’s turned having his intelligence underestimated so often into a weapon he wields with great skill.

His hand writing is atrocious. He can read it fine, but not even Tyreen can half the time. Almost proud of having his own shitty shorthand code he can use for notes.

Can count the amount of times he’s worn underwear by choice on his one hand since adulthood. Didn’t have any on Nekrotafeyo, and fuck it. Freedoms comfortable and let’s you have very low slung pants.

Very low slung pants are very good at distracting possible competitors/business partners enough during interactions to either cause them to slip up, or underestimate his cunning again. Either works fine for him, he gets attention, and the upper hand. Win win.

Snores really bad from a combo of mods and compromised respiratory system. Modded tongue tends to slowly extend the deeper his sleep gets, and he’s woken up with it over his eyes before. Will completely deny he snores, only Tyreen has heard it and she’s clearly lying, right?

Did most of his own piercings and barely flinched. Full on SOBBED after he pierced his nips. Sat on his bathroom floor for an hour waiting for the pain to pass while strongly second guessing his life decisions.

Gets extremely emotionally invested in classical music / soundtracks and falls asleep listening to his fave playlists often. Has nicer dreams when he does than if he doesn’t, and also feels like it helps boost his creativity while working. Doesn’t know why.

A combo of keeping his neck covered under the collar, and the scarring on his throat, has left it hyper sensitive when uncovered. A caress will instantly have him snapping viciously or melting into a gasping mess of goosebumps and shivers depending on who’s hand it was.

Super comfortable with nudity, his self esteem issues are focused on his body’s layout and the self perceived damage/disfunction of it, nudity doesn’t come into play at all.

That is, as long as his bracer is on. What’s under the bracer is the one part of his body he would be terrified of showing to someone he valued in a vulnerable situation. Any COV worshipper stupid enough to think just because they can touch him naked means they could try and touch under the bracer is going to really miss their hand afterwards ( if they are still alive to miss it ).

Would love to be able to play a musical instrument well but he’s struggled with any he tried before as only his existing hand is dextrous enough for one. Would really appreciate and treasure someone with the patience and kindness to teach him, but knows that would mean dropping the God King persona, and can’t justify damaging their reputation just for something that would make him happy.

Gets recognised instantly regardless of how he dresses or looks, which he loathes. There is no way to hide his height or build, let alone the markings on his face. Really misses being able to just wander and explore like he could in the COV’s early days.

Really, really, really loves food, but his ill health means he can’t eat the way he’d like and often has to avoid foods he wished he could eat more. God King Calypso is known for being exceptionally choosy about the food he eats. In reality, Troy just can’t trust a lot of the overly rich food he’s served.

Massively enjoys cooking in his Sanctum when alone, and would treasure doing so for anyone he sees as a friend. Has, very rarely in the past, and loved seeing how surprised they were that he’s not useless at it.

Solely drinks alcohol to get drunk, can’t really taste beer very well and doesn’t enjoy most spirits. He’s a functional alcoholic but would deny he relies on it or other drugs (he absolutely does) and blows off concern from medics as it being something he chooses to do, not needs.

Wishes he could smoke Pandoran weed but wouldn’t risk the damage to his weak lungs, tends to make tea with what he grows in his ship, shares it with Tyreen a lot. She can’t touch plants, so he has no problem doing the green thumb work and sharing with her when she needs to relax.

Unless their dad had thought it to them or they saw it in an echo show, then the twins had no grasp of basic social do’s and don'ts when they reached Pandora.

Troy would have no problem sitting in a merger meeting picking his nose while Tyreen scratched her ass in front of board members. They learned a lot of their social skills the hard way, having been asked to please, please stop by priests and saints.

Has never won a burping competition against Tyreen in his life. Is genuinely irritated by this.

Can’t dance. Can strut and pose, has a great sense of rhythm, just cannot for the life of him do anything dance wise. Please don’t ask him to it will end in tears (his).

Savant with numbers, sees them as patterns like his dad did. Thought everyone could till he met people on Pandora. Gets aggressively frustrated with anyone who he needs to explain his process for reaching a mathematical conclusion to, because they never get it.

Complete idiot tier for animals. Likes them a lot, just doesn’t know what any of them are and no one is in a position to correct him without risking embarrassing the God King publicly and having their neck snapped.

Calls everything he sees a Skag. Rakks? Flying Skags. Bullymongs? Arm Skags. Skags? “Those bitchin lil’ mouth dudes.”

Really enjoys art and has a beautiful defined style with spray paint. Dumbs it down for propaganda, but his Sanctum is filled with canvases that are experimental colour and line pieces. Very much likes working with holy iconography but tends to only illustrate Tyreen this way in his own time..

Spends a lot of hours in the Mechanicum and knows a lot of the Tinks in higher leadership position by name. Likes to talk engineering with them and feels comfortable enough to drop a lot of the God King persona and actually enjoy the conversation.

A Troy who’s excited and interested in a discussion is all twinkling eyes and gentle, eager smile. He often has to remind himself to shift back into persona mid conversation, and it can be quite.. sad.. to see him go from so clearly happy, back to an icy, scathing asshole.

Incredible at lying but cannot bluff for shit. Play any card game with him and he has instant facial tells (squints and sticks his tongue slightly out the side of his mouth when looking at his cards). Doesn’t understand why he could never win against his dad or Tyreen, probably never will.

Would never wear his reading glasses publicly, thinks they completely destroy his overall aesthetic and lines of his face mods. Won’t accept his’s wrong about this from anyone, though he personally likes how much more like himself he looks when wearing them in private.

Tyreen was so sick of seeing his ass crack, she was the one who suggested the overly tight belt that became part of his outfit. All his pants that are the right length are far too wide in the waist for his narrow hips. He could just get fitted ones now, but the low slung waist line + belt combo is part of his look at this point.

Incredibly high pain tolerance for almost everything, says he barely felt the tattoos and genuinely means it. The constant pain from the bracer and damaged shoulder joint has let him numb to most other relatively low levels of pain.

Is an amazing kisser as long as what you enjoy is the threat of being consumed alive. Troy’s mouth is a self designed weapon, verbally and physically, and he’s never been in a position to learn to use it tenderly. Doesn’t let worshippers choose to kiss him when bedding them, and is aggressive with it if he chooses to kiss them.

Would love to learn how to be tender from someone who cared for him and he felt safe enough with to allow his persona to slip and be vulnerable with, but as the years go on and the God King becomes more in control, Troy has become resigned to the fact that it’s something he will never have.

Very self conscious about his hygiene and showers usually twice daily if he can. Everything on Pandora is covered in sweat and filth, and he can’t risk getting infections considering the amount of open ports along his body. Really enjoys scents and has a surprisingly large collection.

Gets highly irritated with public displays of affection. Intensely, soul crushingly envious.

This gets dangerous late God King era as he becomes more and more violent. People have learned to be extremely careful to not show affection to each other in viewing distance of him at all, or risk losing a limb. Or worse.

Sex drive only gets higher as time goes on. For the first few years he much preferred pleasuring himself rather than interacting with the squalid heaving masses of followers throwing their bodies at him, but by the time of the God King era in later COV years, he can’t stand touching himself anymore. He doesn’t want to touch his body, and the God King is more than happy to let others praise it nightly instead.

Sleeps with huge cushions he brushes off as being for comfort, but deep down he knows its because their weight and pressure helps him not feel so alone.

Squints a lot and is known for scowling, but it’s mostly due to terrible headaches, not eye sight issues or his mood. The dark eye makeup helps with the glare a little but he’s noticeably paler than his sister due to the bright sun causing them more often than not and him preferring to stay in the shade of indoors.

Has kept every single thing given to him out of kindness. Will keep sugar packets if someone brings him a coffee with one out of concern for him looking tired. If he feels it was done because they like him and not out of respect for his title, he will keep anything he’s been given.

Most of the people who gave him these tiny things he’s kept.. well.. they aren’t around anymore (no one he’s gotten to know well chooses to stay very long ).. but he still likes to look through them sometimes when he needs to be reminded he’s possible to like.

The collection looks like a little box of trash to anyone else, but bar his old jacket his father made for him out of one of his own that he still keeps hidden away, it’s probably his most treasured possession.

[sky-scribbles]

I hope someone wants ~1700 words of Ortega angst, because I have it. Nonspecific Ortega and Sidestep, minor Retribution spoilers. Tw: mentions of death and funerals.

‘Herald can handle it. He's stronger than you think.’

You look at your old friend’s face: defensive, defiant, daring you to argue. And you realise that you’re angry.

It’s a small thing. It shouldn’t really be a thing at all, but you’ve heard these words too many times. And shit, here goes your brain, flinging you back in time to a life before Sidestep fell from the tower and you fell apart. Forcing you to remember –

 –  yourself, on the ground. You’ve fallen, and you can’t get up.

Like an idiot, you forgot to lock the wheels of your chair last night. So the damn thing skidded to the side as you tried to get in, and you slipped out. Crashed out, really. Now you’re anchored to the floor by your own legs, a deadweight you can’t shift, and you’re trying to drag yourself into the chair and you can’t.

‘Stop it. Just stop and let me help you.’ There’s an awful, choked note in your mother’s voice, and you look away, so you won’t have to see her cry.

You want to tell her you can manage, because this is beyond embarrassing and it makes you feel beyond helpless.  But you can’t manage. So you stop moving and let her lift you. It’s clumsy, because she’s so small, but after a moment of struggle you’re in the chair at last, and she’s kneeling in front of you. Reaching up to touch your face. Trying to turn it towards her.

You turn further away instead. Because you made her cry. You were careless and stupid, you idiot, and you made her cry.

‘I’m sorry,’ you mumble. And of course she says something about you not needing to apologise, but you do, so you don’t listen. ‘This won’t be happening much longer.’

She sucks in a sharp breath and takes hold of your hands. ‘I know we’ve been over this, but –’

‘Yeah. We have. And I’m sure.’

‘About wanting to walk again. Of course you’re sure about that.’ Her hands close firmer around yours. ‘But once you put your name on that contract, once they mod you… they could ask you to do anything. And you know what kind of people they’ll make you fight, you know what monsters like that can do, you know what happened to your grandpa – ‘

You bite the inside of your mouth. You know what’s coming, and you mustn’t cry.

‘- and after watching you go through this…’ Her voice is cracking into splinters, and you bite down harder. ‘You’ve been so, so brave, but you don’t have to spend the rest of your life fighting the government’s battles. And I – I want to see you walking, I want you to see you happy, but I don’t want to see you – ’

She can’t get the word out, but you know what she would have said. And maybe you will end up dead. But at least you’ll have had a chance to fight, first.

‘Mom. It’s okay.’ It’s not, but you wriggle your fingers around until your hands are holding hers instead, and meet her eyes at last. ‘I know the risks. I’ve made the choice. And I can handle it.’

‘You don’t have to do this,’ Sentinel says.

There’s a hand on your arm, and you suppose it’s his. He’s looking at you with the same gentle, wary look that everyone’s been giving you recently. Since it happened. Since Hood became gone.

Hood. You half expect him to straighten up in the casket, roll his eyes at you before flinging the suit jacket aside. He’d probably tear off the shirt sleeves for good measure. Are his tattoos still just as vibrant, underneath the clothes that smother him? Do tattoos fade after death? Why is this what you’re thinking about at his funeral?

Why are you thinking at all? It hurts. You should stop.

You swallow, and force your focus onto Sentinel. ‘I’m all right. Everything’s ready.'

His lips purse. ‘I wasn’t talking about the speech.’

You’d rather not talk about the speech either. It’s laughable, the idea that you could contain a man like Hood – a man who got drunk with you and who fought alongside you and who made you – in a handful of flashcards and some pretty words.

But you know what’s Sentinel’s worried about. The aftermath. He knows what you’ll do, once all the cameras are on you: declare war.

You shouldn’t step in front of so many flashing lights, and you shouldn’t challenge the person who has the strings of the city in their hands, but Hood is dead. Hood is in a suit he would have hated. Hood is gone and you are burning worse than you ever did when your electricity escaped its emitters. It’s not safe, making an enemy of Hollow Ground, but it doesn’t matter, because Hollow Ground has made an enemy of you.

The city’s kingpin has cracked you open like the earth, and magma is bubbling through the wounds. Nothing can stop that. Sentinel is wrong; there’s no choice. Not for you.

‘I have to do this,’ you say. For Hood, for yourself. Because you’re the Marshal now. ‘Don’t worry. I can handle it.’

Maybe Anathema was right. Maybe you should have brought in the whole team.

But you’re the Marshal; you’re the one who makes these decisions and deals with the consequences. Your eyes flick to Themmy, who can’t be hurt, to Steel, who’s protected, to Sidestep, who knows how to fight this kind of threat. Nothing should happen to them. And if it does, you’ll protect them.

That’s what you do. You will give everything you have for them, and it will have to be enough. You can handle it.

Still, you turn to Sidestep, wishing you could see behind the mask, spot any misgivings or mistrust on the face you’ve come to know so well. ‘Sure you don’t want to sit this one out?’

But you get a firm no in response, and you nod. Breathe in deep. Part of being a leader is believing in your friends and their skills, so you will. It’s okay. Sidestep can handle this.

(You’re wrong.)

Chen comes to find you, after the funeral, after everything, finding his way to your apartment even in the dark and the rain. He doesn’t yell. He doesn’t ask you what you were thinking when you punched that asshole, because he knows the answer is that you couldn’t think, and he doesn’t ask why you did it, because he knows the answer to that, too. He just sighs, sits down beside you, and waits for you to speak.

Which you do, without looking up. ‘I’m done. I’m out. It’s over.’

You wait for the protest, the we can’t afford to lose you too. Instead he says, ‘Are you sure?’

‘You know that I am.’

You should apologise for leaving him without a team. But there’s only room inside you for one apology, and the people you want to give it to are dead.

‘I was wrong,’ you say, because you can at least give him an explanation. ‘I thought I was doing enough. Giving enough. All those operations and press interviews and all the times I nearly died, I thought that was enough, and I thought I was enough. And it wasn’t, and I wasn’t, and I’m not, and –’

Chen says your name, you think, and perhaps he touches your arm to stop you. You don’t stop. ‘I told myself I could handle it, and I told my team I could handle it, and I was lying. I lied to Sidestep and Themmy and now they’re dead. And I’m not going back. I’m not giving another team a Marshal who breaks when it matters most and who lies to them.’

‘You didn’t lie.’ Chen’s voice is gentle, and you’re almost angry. Why is he comforting you? Why isn’t he grabbing you by the shoulders and snarling at you that you failed? Someone should. ‘You tried to make the call that kept your team safe. What else could you have done?’

‘I could have not been Marshal.’ You look him in the face, like you did with your mother all that time ago, because he needs to understand. He needs to see through your lies like she didn’t. ‘I shouldn’t have been the one making that call. I should never have been making any calls. Because I can’t handle it, Wei. I never could –’

 –  and now you need to stop. Stop reliving that. Breathe in, breathe out, and you’re back in the break room with Sidestep, who’s watching you without knowing what just happened in your head.

And you think of Herald. He pushed himself so hard after the gala, even when he couldn’t walk without pain. Kept volunteering for press conference after press conference because he had to do something. ‘I can handle it,’ he told you.

Wei says they’re grooming him to be Marshal one day.

Daniel thinks he’s willing to pay the price of being a hero. And maybe he’ll keep thinking that. Maybe he’ll survive where Hood didn’t, stay whole like you didn’t.

Or maybe he won’t.  And it’ll be your fault again, for not protecting him. You couldn’t even train him right; he had to pull Sidestep in himself. He thinks he can handle it, and Sidestep thinks he can handle it, but you no longer believe that this life can be handled. You think it handles people instead, snatches them up and breaks them limb by limb.

‘You treat him like a baby,’ Sidestep’s saying. ‘I should know, I've been trying to pick up your slack with his training.’ And everything inside you twists into a knot and you’re snapping back before you can stop yourself, because Herald’s not a baby, he’s a man who’s too much like you.

You can’t bear to see him meet your fate. You can’t bear to see him break. You can’t live with it.

You can’t handle it.

[beybladeimagines]

I loved your recent headcanon of the team in their early 20s, thank you so much for that! I have a question Regarding hiwatari corp, I'm currently reading the manga beyblade rising, I'm confused, Kai's parents have been around all along? Voltaire isn't as evil as we thought? Maybe I'm being dim, but are you able to explain what hiwatari corp actually seems to do? And info regarding Kai's parents? I always thought voltaire was evil, so I'm confused why Kai would work for him. It's been years!

Mod Note: Yeah, when the manga revealed that Kai actually has a pretty decent connection with his family, I disassociated for like five minutes, because that lowkey makes no sense and contradicts so much of what we’ve seen. Let’s try to make some sense out of the chaos, shall we?

Let’s start with Hiwatari Enterprise. For the longest time, it’s remained a mystery. I’ve had to do some digging around to figure out what exactly it is. From what I’ve seen based on popular discussion, it’s apparently assumed to be a Japanese military company. But, if you ask me where in the manga it states that… I have absolutely no idea. Even “military company” is rather vague, because that could mean anything. Do they make steel, weapons, chemicals, electronics, etc.? I’m just going to weave together my thoughts.

So, let’s entertain the idea that it is a military company. I would argue that makes a lot of sense, because it explains the whole dynamic between Voltaire and Boris, Boris’ quest for domination, the entire existence of the Abbey, and the militarization and resocialization of young boys to become soldiers. Voltaire may not be serving in the military, but because he often engages with military officials through meetings and deals, he’s already familiar with the process of establishing order, of breaking people down, and of calling the shots from behind the scenes. As for what Voltaire’s company actually makes, I would like to venture a guess that it deals in electronics / devices. This would explain the massive amount of training resources that were found at the Abbey and that many of the boys were subjected to. Hell, I’d even argue that some of those boys were testing out Hiwatari Enterprise’s devices before they were deemed safe for use or even safe for the public. They were actual guinea pigs in a multitude of ways.

Fast forward to when Voltaire gets arrested and Boris manages to escape punishment. Even though Voltaire wasn’t really…doing anything, because of his connections with the military, I imagine his detainment was prioritized. Many would probably argue that Boris was simply “following orders” but in reality, law enforcement would most likely prioritize the man who is literally responsible for making devices for the military (due to that insane amount of prestige) instead of the man who did the physical, mental, and emotional abuse all at once. Gotta love the law’s priorities. 

Now, let’s talk about Kai. Why would he work for him? In a world where Voltaire apparently isn’t arressted, why would Kai go back to his abuser? We’ve got a couple different routes we can go here. Let’s say we’re following the anime’s canon. Here, Kai isn’t working for his grandfather; rather, he full on replaces him. The reason I argue that Kai would return to the company is because he knows that that’s where all of his trauma started. Kai is interested in dismantling the very thing that broke him in the first place. It’s as if he’s stepping back in time and getting a chance to start all over again. He gets to be the one in a position of power and he gets to put things back on track without involving blading. He feels as if he’s righting all of the wrongs he was exposed to. It’s not like Kai really even cares about the business aspect of things, but I do believe he wants to be seen as a real leader by others.

Now, let’s conceptualize the mess that is the manga’s canon. If Voltaire is still around and Kai decides to work for him, I imagine it’s because he wants to distance himself from the Bladebreakers. Kai had essentially embarrassed himself a multitude of times through his acts of betrayal. If we’re conceptualizing things with a dark twist, I’d say this act serves as the last chance for him to regain control or dominance, or to finally be seen as the best. I imagine that the longer someone is around a being as manipulative as Voltaire, they start to embrace the same problematic qualities and justify their desire for destruction. In Kai’s case, maybe he wasn’t so willing? Maybe it’s a case of manipulation. Or, maybe he’s just trying to keep the family together and stable (financially, maybe?) so he decides to do something he wouldn’t normally agree to. 

In this case, I’m going to let ya’ll decide what you want to believe, because it really does depend on the canon you choose to follow and how much you want to focus on the grim reality that is Kai’s life. 

Yo, but let’s talk about Kai’s parents, because they’re confusing too. I wrote headcanons before about Kai’s mom. Essentially, when Kai decided to be as hateful as Voltaire it tore her apart, and yet, we don’t see her standing up to Voltaire when he was telling Kai about how his dad chose blading over him. But, I imagine that moment was confusing and hard for anyone. Her husband just stood up to his father, but his father has made their life pretty stable, but his father is also imposing a problematic rhetoric onto her son, but also…you have no idea where the hell your own husband is even going and what he plans on doing. I imagine she regrets that day and it’s the first thing she thinks about when she wakes up every morning. 

As for Kai’s dad, well… Kai has a hard time swallowing his pride and I believe he gets that from his dad. I think his dad knew he contributed to fucking up his own son’s life by not making many attempts to clear the air. But because so much time has passed, he has no idea if he should even bring the trauma up or act like everything is fine. I imagine he tries to act like everything’s fine and tries his best to win Kai’s affections. He pops back into Kai’s life rather unexpectedly, but Kai is ready to forgive him. He got the truth and although Kai struggles to understand and truly come terms with said truth, I think he just wants his family back, because lord knows his friendships aren’t stable. It takes a while for Kai’s father to actually address their past, but I think everyone in that household is just ready to be a family again. They have missed so many years together. Kai is so fucking tired of being bitter. This doesn’t even involve blading or being the best. This involves having someone to come home to, this involves unconditional love, this involves receiving a form of support that is absent of jealousy. He needs family now more than ever and I think everyone is determined to rebuild as well.

As for Voltaire being portrayed as the strict grandpa that’s suddenly welcomed back into the family, I-… I don’t get it. It’s completely out of character. I mean, my goodness. This entire time we thought Kai didn’t have a family or if we thought that he did, we assumed they were abusive or something… Now that we found out they actually love one another, I can explain that - easy peasy. But Voltaire being reintegrated into the family picture? And not arrested? You got me fucked up. I can’t even conceptualize a rational justification for that nonsense other than they rewrote the canon and in that canon, apparently Voltaire did nothing wrong. I might need some time to think that part through, anon. But I hope everything else made a hell of a lot more sense!

[hpconsentfest]

Consent Fest 2019: Masterlist

CF friends--here we are. After months of prompting, creating, betaing, revising, reading, hyping, squeeing, and guessing, it’s time for reveals. 

As with last year, the mods were staggered by the depth of thought and care and time and energy that everyone put into their creations. Likewise, we were heartened every time we saw a like, reblog, kudos, comment, or other hype.

Thank you to every creators and every reader and hyper for giving this fest such a wonderful, community vibe--you folks make CF.

<3

Now, without further ado, read on for reveals!

ART

Title: Coming loose Artist: @owlpostart Prompt: #80 Rating: E Pairing: None Warnings/Content Notes: Lots of very pornographic NSFW drawings,  internalised acephobia, unenjoyable sex, bite and blood fetish.   Summary: Pansy Parkinson has a lot of sex. Until she realises that it’s okay to not want to. Medium: Ink and marker on paper

 Title: Human, Not Object Artist: @nifflers-n-nargles Prompt: #23 Rating: Teen Warnings/Content Notes: Street harassment, cat calling, unsolicited touching, verbal harassment of a sexual nature, fighting back, defiant woman, powerful woman Summary: Fleur Delacour has endured harassment of all kinds from men from a young age. Growing up she’s told that’s “just what men do.” As a powerful woman learning to navigate the world she finds this mentality unacceptable and chooses to live her life defiantly. Medium: Digital

 Title: Something they don’t want to be afraid of Artist: @impasseart Prompt: # 21 Rating: explicit Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Internalized Homophobia, unenjoyable sex in a flashback See full tagset on AO3 Summary: Draco struggles with his internalized homophobia and fears, even when he really wants something. Last time, it went ugly. And ugly won’t do. They have to try again. Find a way to make it better. Medium: digital art

 Title: Who They Are Artist: @spaceaas Prompt: #15 Rating: G Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: genderqueer/nonbinary character, minor transphobia that is more unintended ignorance than anything else Summary: Draco’s always known who they are. They’ve just been waiting for someone to listen. Medium: Digital

FIC

Title: All The Little Signs Add Up Author: @gold-from-straw Prompt: # 49 Rating: Explicit Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Past domestic abuse, past child abuse Summary: Harry starts to notice some worrying signs in his relationship with Draco. He flinches when Harry moves too quickly, he thinks everything is going to be blamed on him, and he doesn’t think his own desires count. Harry, fresh from dealing with his own childhood PTSD, jumps to some conclusions. Some of them are right, some of them are way off. Word Count: 9624

 Title: Blind Item #3 Author: @postjentacular Prompt: #88 Rating: T Pairing: Albus Severus Potter/Scorpius Malfoy Warnings/Content Notes:  tabloids, right to privacy, forced outing, homophobic slurs, rated T for swearing, british sixteen year old talking about sex, blink and you’ll miss it threat of sexual violence Summary:  What’s the ssssecret doing the rounds in a certain common room? Rumour has it that the other snakes have been turning a blind eye to this burgeoning love affair, but what will the boys’ fathers say when they hear about it?   Word Count: 7064

Title: Blood Will Out Author: @frnklymrshnkly Prompt: # 87 Rating: T Pairing: Marietta Edgecombe/Pansy Parkinson Warnings/Content Notes: menstruation, PMS, endometriosis, heavy bleeding, cramps, intense period pain, Healers, doctors, hospitals, exams, critique of Healing and medical institutions, family secrets, memory modification, horrible parenting, blood status discourse, self-reflection redemption arcs See full tagset on AO3 Summary: Marietta Edgecombe doesn’t need re-education. She’s done nothing wrong. She just wants to keep her head down and keep her job. At least until Pansy Parkinson starts acting weird and a visit to the Healer suddenly brings the post-war conversation too close for comfort. Word Count: 21565

 Title: Capture the moment (Capture my heart) Author: @all-drarry-to-me Prompt number: 24 Rating: Mature Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Asexual Draco Malfoy, Demisexuality, Queer Character, Brief mention (from previous encounter) of Mildly Dubious Consent, Photographs, Minor Luna Lovegood/Pansy Parkinson, Minor Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley Summary: Surrounded by photographs with just a cat to keep him company, Draco was left questioning his identity and what a new label would mean for his relationship with Harry. Word Count: 9,612

Title: Curry & Wine Author: @dorthyanndrarry Prompt: # 35 Rating: Mature Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Mentions of main character being pressured to have sex in the past Summary:  Harry’s promised Draco their first proper date. What could be better than homemade curry, a little wine, a much-needed talk? Word Count: 1,651

Title: Epoximise Author: @ladderofyears Prompt: #10 Rating: Explicit Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Consent Notes: Press and Tabloids, Dom/Sub Play, Sub Harry Potter, Dom Draco Malfoy, Sex Magic, Kink Spells, Coming on Demand, Dildos, Magic used as a Restraint, Panic Attacks, Discussion about Consent, Discussion about setting Ground Rules before Sexual Activity, Discussion about Safe Words, Sexual Triggers. Word count: 2487

Title: Forbidden Fruit Author: @momstiel Prompt: # 15 Rating: Teen Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Internalized Homophobia Summary: “To Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter had always been akin to forbidden fruit.” In which Harry comes out as genderqueer, and Draco envies his self-confidence. Word Count: 1,907 

 Title: The Generation Who Lived Author: @lettersbyelise Prompt: # 11 Rating: Explicit Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Journalist Draco Malfoy, Enemies to lovers, Past relationship, Getting back together, Minor Luna/Neville, Minor Ginny/Blaise, Interview format, Post second war with Voldemort, Enthusiastic consent, Rimming, Anal sex, POV Draco Malfoy Summary: In the months leading up to the 10th anniversary of the Battle of Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy writes a series of articles about famous war survivors.

So far, he’s managed to interview everyone he wanted.

Everyone…except his old nemesis, his one-time lover, and the elusive war hero who stubbornly refuses to be featured in Draco’s interview series, Harry Potter. Word Count: 14761

Title:I See You In The Club Author: Elle Gray (LGray) Rating: E Pairing: Draco Malfoy/OMC Warnings/Content Notes: Sex club, Dom/sub play, Light Bondage, Age difference, Consent Issues, Dubious Consent due to Identity Issues, Ruminating on the Topic of Consent See full tagset on AO3 Summary: Draco, recently divorced (for the second time) is finally free to explore ‘other interests’. In particular, reconnecting with some long-put-aside desires to play with dominance. He’s not confident in what he’s doing, but he’s done his research, and surely this delectable young thing, kneeling in wait for him, can help?

'Hello,’ he says, and feels immediately stupid.

'Hello, Sir,’ Alex says, his voice low, barely above a whisper. Draco wonders if it’s an effort to sound sexy, or show submission, or if his throat is so well-fucked by others that he can no longer talk. He doesn’t even know if it matters. Word Count: 12909

Title: Knights in Shining Armour (Ever After Lovers) Author: @thirdeyeblinkings Prompt #: 23 Rating: M Pairing: Bill Weasley/Fleur Delacour Warnings: No major archive warnings See tagset on AO3 Summary: Fleur has been objectified for most of her life, her bodily autonomy often dismissed. Being part Veela only makes matters worse. Word Count: 8.6 k

Title: Like The Sun Author: @marlenemckinn Prompt:  #78 Rating: T Pairing: Remus Lupin/Sirius Black Warnings/Content Notes: Unaware Veritaserum consumption See full tagset on AO3 Summary: Sirius wants a good laugh and when he comes across some Veritaserum, he decides slipping into Remus Lupin’s, the ever guarded werewolf, pumpkin juice will be a great way to start their day. Remus ends up revealing a bit more than Sirius had anticipated. Word Count: 4033

 Title: Lily Luna, Unapologetic: The Things We Don’t Talk About (But Should) Author: @nifflers-n-nargles and @slashfoxes  Prompt: #39 Rating: Hard T Pairing: None Warnings/Content Notes: Implied Dubcon/Noncon, Offscreen Dubcon/Noncon, Implied Violence (offscreen), Implied vs Explicit Consent, Consent Issues, Teaching Consent, Sex Education, Peer Pressure, Harry Potter Next Generation, Badass!Lily Luna, When Internet Meets Magic, Alternative format: magazine profile Summary: “Before I can get my first question out Lily asks me, ‘When was the first time someone gave you a sex talk?’I find myself telling her about overhearing my mom in my older sister’s room when she was home on hols from Hogwarts in her fourth year—I was 10 and had just received my letter. It was the year there had been a string of love potion ‘accidents’ and I could tell my mum was worried.

She nods and jots something down in her notebook. As I continue telling her about these memories, I wonder why I’m sharing all this information with Lily. Aren’t I the one supposed to be interviewing her?

‘That sounds awful,’ she commiserates, ‘but can I ask you one more thing?’ I nod, curiosity piqued by her tone. ‘When was the first time someone talked to you about consent?’” Word Count: ~8,000

 Title: Long live the beautiful heart (who find love and tear it apart) Author: @etalice Prompt: #46 Rating: GEN Pairing: Ginny Weasley/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Angst, Depression, Abusive relationship See full tagset on AO3 Summary: If Harry were someone else, someone who loves and understand books, someone like Hermione or Draco, he might think of a classical tragedy. He might section the whole catastrophe neatly into five acts and make sense of it that way. But he’s not, and so he doesn’t, and, anyway it’s just the beginning of the story yet. Word Count: 6630

Title: (Never) Be Still My Beating Heart Author: @sliceosunshine Prompt: Self-Prompt Rating: M Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes:  Hurt/Comfort, Anxiety, Trauma,  Violence, some blood, Vampires, Light Dubcon Parallels, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, further explanation of dubcon tag in A/N See full tagset on AO3 Summary:  Post-War, Draco decides he’s done being comfortable. Which turns out to be quite convenient as he’s thrust headlong into a case involving a Serial Biting Vampire. Worst of all, Potter’s gotten himself involved. Draco thinks he can take it, so long as his heart doesn’t give out on him along the way.   Word Count:  15595  

 Title: a note to the boy I love Author: @violetclarity Prompt: # 81 Rating: E Pairing: Albus Severus Potter/Scorpius Malfoy Warnings: Underage See full tagset on AO3 Content Notes: epistolary, first person POV, established relationship, school romance, communication, consent, sexting except in letters because they are wizards, underage in that they are both seventeen (17), first time, loss of virginity (but that’s a social construct anyway), letter writing, dirty talk (sort of), vignettes, kissing, frottage, dry humping, oral sex, love confessions, boys in love Summary: Albus knows what he wants to do in bed with Scorpius, but struggles with actually talking about it. Scorpius’s solution? Writing letters. Word Count: 4,359

Title: A pink tie, a box of condoms Author: Barry_Manilows_Wardrobe Prompt: 52 Rating: E Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: See tagset on AO3 Summary: It had been months since they’d last seen each other.  And if Potter didn’t show up soon… Word Count: 1459

 Title: One and Only Author: @nerdherderette Prompt: # 20 Rating: Explicit Pairing: Albus Severus Potter/Draco Malfoy Warnings/Content Notes: Bodyguard AU, Bodyguard!Draco, Minister for Magic!Harry Potter, Pansexual Albus Potter, Potions Accident, Forced Bonding, Sharing a Bed, Legilimency, Explicit Sexual Content, Masturbation, Frottage, Oral Sex, Anal Sex, Bottom!Draco Malfoy, Age Difference, Implied/Reference Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Prostitution, References to Addiction, Implied/Referenced Dubious Consent, Eventual Consensual Relationship, Romance Summary: Draco always knew his downfall would be at the hands of a Potter.He just never realised which one. Word Count: 19.6k

Title: Risks Worth Taking Author: @keyflight790 Prompt: 83 Rating: E Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Light BDSM, Dubious Consent, Mildly Dubious Consent See full tagset on AO3 Summary: Draco and Harry broke up 78 nights ago. Only a miracle (or perhaps an errant spell) could bring them back together. Word Count: 18,149

  Title: Ron Weasley and the Clothes of Doom Author: Liesha130 Prompt: #86 Rating: Explicit Pairing: Blaise Zabini/Ron Weasley Warnings/Content Notes: (I honestly don’t know) Summary: Do the clothes make the man?Ron Weasley thinks he has no chance, until one night when he dresses up and Blaise Zabini can’t take his eyes off him. The solution is easy, then, right? Ron just has to keep dressing up, and Blaise will keep wanting him. But every time Ron puts the new clothes on, he’s sent spiraling off into a past filled with insecurity. Will he really be able to keep this up without going completely bonkers? And what does Blaise actually want from him, anyway? Word Count: 32,872

Title: Safe Words Author: @e-sebastian Prompt: # 47 Rating: Explicit Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Consent, BDSM, Bondage, Whipping, Safe words, Safe Sane and Consensual, Kink, Family Drama, lots of book reading, Dirty Talk, Slapping, Kink Negotiation, Rough Sex, Accidental Bodily Harm, Remorse, Weasley Bashing, Molly Bashing, but please know it’s from Draco’s admittedly skewed perspective, In this house we love Molly Weasley to death even if our characters don’t always, Married couples are kinky too Summary: Draco discovers his husband has been keeping a secret from him. At first he’s amused. Then he’s curious.

The problem? Harry’s always had a hard time saying no. Word Count: 26,867

Title: Sex Ed for Witches and Wizards of All Ages Author: AhaMarimbas Prompt: # 68 Rating: E Pairing: Multi-ship Warnings/Content Notes: Major Character Death, Underage, Explicit sexual content See full tagset on AO3 Summary: Draco and Astoria decide on their wedding night that they’re not going to raise their future children with the same outdated traditions they were raised with, especially relating to love and sex. They never could have predicted exactly how much that decision would change Scorpius’ life. Word Count: 76 732

 Title: So sweet with that blood in your teeth Author: @bangyababy Prompt: # 16 Rating: E Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Dom/Sub, Consent issues, vampires, sleep issues, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Mind manipulation, depression See full tagset on AO3 Summary: Harry works for the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures. His latest case his to stop a vampire uprising lead by none other than Draco Malfoy. Malfoy seems willing to negotiate with the Ministry. There’s just one small condition: Harry has to agree to be Malfoy’s dinner. Word Count: 25k

 Title: swallow your words Author: @candybarrnerd Prompt: # 67 Rating: Explicit Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter  Warnings/Content Notes: No archive warnings apply Summary: The truth is, not many things are known about the magic that is behind soulmarks. They’ll turn up when they want and not before.

The truth is, you don’t get a choice in your soulmark. The truth is, not everyone is okay with that. Word Count: 9,140

Title: That’s Ace Author: @acciotomriddle Prompt: Self-prompt Rating: Explicit Pairing: Charlie Weasley/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Asexual character, bisexual character, sex toys, non-penetrative sex, mutual masturbation, monogamy Summary:  Charlie is asexual. Harry isn’t. They still find a way to satisfy both of their needs, however   Word Count: 2080

 Title: They Talked Author: @unadulteratedstorycollector Prompt: Self-prompt Rating: Teen Pairing: Ron & Draco (platonic) Warnings/Content Notes: none Summary:  Is it ok if they talk? Draco isn’t sure, but it keeps happening. Word Count: 1094

 Title: This Year’s Love Author: @thusspoketrish Prompt: Self-Prompt. H/D—how to navigate feelings for your best mate. Rating: Explicit Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: This story discusses complex topics such as slut-shaming, promiscuity, heartbreak, dating culture(s), and sexual autonomy within everyday life. See full tagset on AO3 Summary: This year’s love had better last, heaven knows it’s high time when you try to make lovers from friends. But Harry Potter realises time and time again that it’s simply not possible for him. And then along comes Draco Malfoy— the ultimate foe on the mend. Whatever will become of them? A story about love. Word Count: 84000

Title: A Touch Of Respect Author: @rose-grangerweasleyisbae Prompt: #90 Rating: Teen Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Family Drama, Touch Phobia, Panic Attacks, Old Fashioned Parenting, Angst with a Happy Ending, Past Minor Character Death (Astoria), Past Ginny Weasley/Harry Potter, Child in Hospital Summary: Five year old Scorpius isn’t fond of people touching him, and he has a million reasons for it. However, his father is of the opinion that just saying ‘no’ should be enough without giving any of those reasons, but not everyone in his new-found family agrees. Word Count: 23.432

Title: Unconditional Author: @ladderofyears Prompt: #32 Rating: Teen and up Pairing: Albus Severus Potter/Scorpius Malfoy Warnings/Consent Notes: Anxiety, Boys in Love, First Boyfriend, First Kiss, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Feelings of Inadequacy in a relationship, Discussions of Pyschological and Emotional Manipulation, Relationship Discussions, non-consensual touching, Scorpius gives good advice, Mild Bigoted Language to describe Asexuality, Discussions about Healthy Relationships, Demisexual Albus Potter, Awakening Feelings of Desire, Eventual happy Ending. Word count: 7277

 Title: The Way Your Heart Touches Mine Author: @bafflinghaze Prompt: # 56 Rating: Explicit Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: N/A Summary: What does it mean when a certain someone gives you numerous gifts on ordinary days? Harry’s kind of sure (and mostly hoping) that Draco likes him. So why hasn’t Draco asked him out yet? Word Count: 3.9k

 Title: The Words that Pass Between Us Author: @elderxprice Prompt: # 28 Rating: Teen and Up Audiences Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: POV Draco Malfoy; Invasion of Privacy; Loss of Trust; Infidelity; Misogyny, Classism, Unredeemed Draco Malfoy, Verbal Abuse of a House Elf  Summary: Sometimes, Draco draws pictures of what could have been, had he made all the right choices: Draco in the Slug Club; Draco holding the Quidditch World Cup; Draco holding hands with some nameless, faceless person whose become some sick, secret sort of friend. He’s on every page Draco has touched. He flies with him, sleeps with him, laughs with him. And sometimes, if he pretends hard enough, Draco swears he can feel this person’s breath against his neck; a whispered I love you that has him pressing into the mattress every night, only to wake up alone wishing it were real. Word Count: 10,047

 Title: Working Out The Kinks Author: @potter-loves-malfoy Prompt: #18 Rating: E Pairing: Jeddy Warnings/Content Notes: Mild Dom/Sub Elements, Mild DubCon See full tagset on AO3 Summary:

There are three things James Sirius Potter is certain of:

One: He’s loved his boyfriend since he learned what romantic love was;

Two: There is nothing James wants more than said boyfriend to pound him into the mattress;

Three: His boyfriend, Teddy Lupin, can never find out about number two.

—or—

Four times James tried to pretend he wasn’t submissive and the one time he didn’t.

Word Count: 6,247

 Title: You Set My Soul Alight Author: @parkkate Prompt: #13 Rating: Explicit Pairing: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter Warnings/Content Notes: Post-War, Auror partners, case fic, enemies to lovers, mystery, romance, adventure, pining, getting together, forced proximity, bed sharing, banter, UST, loss of virginity, first time, dub-con, consent issues, secrets, misunderstandings, miscommunication, sleep talking, frottage, rimming, face-sitting, intergluteal sex, anal sex, switching, blow jobs, fluff, angst, angst with a happy ending, references to suicidal thoughts, implied/referenced child abuse, references to depression, mental health issues, emotional hurt/comfort, minor character death, arguing, reconciliation, ewe Summary: Students are going missing at Hogwarts, but that’s not the only mystery Draco is determined to solve. Something’s going on with Potter. He can deny it all he wants. Draco is going to find out what it is. Unfortunately, trying to get to the bottom of it has some unexpected consequences and if Draco isn’t careful, he’s going to jeopardise their mission. Word Count: 54k

[kokichi-and-co-imagine-blog]

What if the v3 cast were all swapped bodies? Like in the monopad they all swapped to the left? What hijinks would ensue?

I would put a picture of me being super excited since I wrote something else that wasn’t DRTC, but I can’t bc my computer is being rude. This one is gonna have some fun fun spoilers though! Keep that in mind. ~Mod Kokichi

V3 Body Swap

Kaede - Ryoma

When Kaede realizes that the only way to see everyone is to strain her neck and everything is incredibly short in her room, she knows something is deeply wrong. She realizes that the only person she could possibly be is Ryoma. The entire day, she spends going about as normally a possible. She wants to finish the day at the piano, but her fingers are far too small to play any of her classical pieces.

Angie - Gonta

Angie wakes up, almost practically unaffected! Sure, she bumps into everything possible due to the large size, and sure her vision is completely horrible and she can’t find his glasses most of the time, and sure his hands are too large to do any of her sculptures, and-- okay, she isn’t quite pleased. However, before anyone can chuckle at her horrible handling of his body, she tells them that perhaps Atua planned this from the start so she can use the might of her lovely god to enforce his will. The best part is everyone seems to listen, though she can’t imagine why!

Gonta - Shuichi

Gonta feels a lot lighter. When he looks into a mirror and sees Shuichi’s eyes looking back, he almost didn’t even realize. His eyes widened a few moments later before moving back and freaking out. Even hearing Shuichi’s weak yelling made him even more spooked. He ran out of the rooms, and he tried to see if everyone was congregated, but he had woken up before the morning announcement, leaving him to run around. He makes a mental note to help Shuichi train his body so he doesn’t get fatigued so easily. 

Himiko - Angie

Had she not needed to wake up and go meet everyone, she wouldn’t have ever figured it out. However, going to slip on clothing that was bright yellow and a bikini? That caught her attention. Leaving the room, she ran into her body, and started stuttering for some help. The distasteful look on her own face and apology for not being able to complete her duties as a maid made her more frustrated. She does appreciate being left to her own devices from Tenko, though. She spends the rest of the day catnapping and keeping a low profile with the others.

Kiibo - Tenko

While he’s a little discombobulated, waking up to feel actual skin made him wonder if his dreams had come true. It turns out that being a human made him so excited that he forgot to put on regular clothing. He grabbed the clothing, not particularly minding it was Tenko’s. Surely she wouldn’t be too upset with him considering he’s not technically a guy. He goes about his day, eating lots of food as research, along with being amazed that he can do regular things such as go to the bathroom and cry. All in all? The day is good for him, and he never reveals he’s in her body. He even puts up the charade that he’s Himiko in front of other people just to be safe. The moment he figured out which person was Tenko, he tried to avoid them as much as possible.

Kaito - Korekiyo

The biggest problem with being in Korekiyo’s body was that he wasn’t made to be an energetic being. He went through everything in the room just to be nosy. He didn’t want to think about what all the rope was for, and he got rid of some various creepy cult things that he had on display. Everyone wasn’t prepared for Korekiyo to sit down and be happily munching at the table to who he assumed was Maki. He made a mental note to avoid the man as much as humanly possible from that point on.

Kirumi - Himiko

Kirumi wasn’t that upset about the body switch, and simply felt disdain for being put in a less… capable body. Clearly Himiko kept herself clean enough, but her height and energy left something to be desired. Regardless, she went around, trying to help everyone get acquainted with their bodies. Cleaning is a hassle, but she somehow still manages to take everyone’s requests. They don’t call her the Ultimate Maid for nothing.

Kokichi - Miu

Waking up and seeing Miu’s clothes fueled him to go to insane lengths to prank her immediately. He wasted no time at all grabbing things from her room and writing down insane plans for her to find. Looking through them all the ones she’d made herself got him wondering what she would need some of the code for. Sure, he didn’t completely understand, but he could tell this wasn’t for anything raunchy or what other people would ask for. He spent the rest of the day making a fool of Miu and falsely accusing others of the body swap. Just a regular day, really.

Korekiyo - Tsumugi

Korekiyo wasn’t fazed at all, and took the entire day to think about how wonderful situations are like this since they test other peoples’ humanity. Not only that, but finding some notes in her room about a secret door in the girls room made for a most interesting discovery. He wouldn’t say anything about it, but his suspicions about how Tsumugi has been operating rise in his mind. He makes a note to keep an eye on her.

Maki - Kaede

Maki wasn’t prepared for this, and was ruffled up about it. She thanked whatever god there was that Kokichi hadn’t taken over her body, and spent the entire day trying to strangle Miu. Was she actually Kokichi, or was she just particularly annoying today? She wasn’t sure, and she had to refrain from resorting to anything too hasty. She would wait out the rest of the day.

Miu - Kiibo

Finally. Finally, Miu can figure out if robots have dicks. After some searching around in his room, she came out and put her hands on her hips, laughing as loud as she possibly could. The amount of raunchy jokes she threw around (“I may be a robot, but I’m better than any vibrator your virgin ass can get your hands on!”) Everyone is absolutely horrified, and everyone afterwards besides the inventor himself agreed to never speak of it again.

Rantaro - Kaito

Rantaro refuses to show that he’s freaked out when he wakes up and his body feels physically weaker. Some of the coughing fits he has puts him out of commission as he has to lean against a wall. Coughing up blood is never any good, and he looks around for something to help him out. With no medicine, and no one ever seeing him cough that violently, he figured that Kaito has been hiding it so no one thinks he’s weaker. He honors Kaito and still tries checking out everything that was written in his second monopad. He tries the hand scanner, but no luck. He decides then and there that Kaito is someone he can trust at the very least. The rest of the day is watching the shenanigans unfold.

Ryoma - Kirumi

Oh boy, being tall fucks him up hard. Sure, it’s easier to grab things, but he keeps shoulder checking everything, and the dress continued to get caught on everything if he didn’t pay any attention to it. He eventually tried to make use of the situation, trying to help others. However, when he sees how capable her body is, he hesitantly goes to his lab to see if it affects how he plays. Holding the racket in his hands feels foreign, yet good. He spends plenty of his time playing and avoiding socialization. When he leaves his ultimate lab, a small smile stays on his lips. Maybe he should request Kirumi to play against him if he ever comes back to it all.

 Shuichi - Maki

Shuichi knows that Maki has been hiding things, so he’s pleased when, out of all the people he could’ve been, he ends up in her body. Opening her closet and seeing a holster that supposedly goes on her leg for a knife freaked him out. He slipped past the crowd of people to check her ultimate lab out. Seeing the arsenal on the walls made him freak out hard, and he grasped the collar of his shirt trying to make it easier to breathe. He timidly checked everything, and cursed the fact that he could see Miu following his tracks throughout the rest of the day. He spends as much time as possible from then on avoiding her.

Tenko - Rantaro

Having to be a male absolutely kills her. She spends the entire day freaking out and being in a constant back and forth from trying to fawn over girls and diss males and freaking out about being a male. She even attempts to break into her room for her own clothing to be more comfortable. Unfortunately, she had no lock picking skills, and whoever was her was diligent enough to lock the door. She continuously blame Kokichi for everything, even though everyone is well aware that Kokichi isn’t even in his own body. However, she takes note of his second monopad, and watched the video. From that point  on,Tenko gives death glares to Rantaro as much as possible.

Tsumugi - Kokichi

Honestly? She should’ve been prepared for this. Considering she knew it was coming up for a fun episode of Danganronpa, she hid whatever she could think of that would uncover her big secret and went to bed. Waking up and seeing the mess in a ridiculous mess shocked her, and she cursed her luck for being horrible. She put it on and decided to give her best impression of Kokichi, considering she can wear his clothing in his body without getting cospox. Not to mention going through every little box in his room and his board of people that has notes on them, investigating where she originally couldn’t. Seeing his comment about Shuichi being possibly trustworthy had her wonder if he should become the main focus in the game instead of Kaede.

[funkymbtifiction]

To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before: Lara Jean Song Covey [INFP]

OFFICIAL TYPING by Charity / The Mod

Functional Order: Fi-Ne-Si-Te

Judging Functional Axis:

Introverted Feeling (Fi) / Extroverted Thinking (Te)

Lara keeps her emotions to herself, or writes them in letters to guys she never intends to read her words! She internalizes things so much, her sister has no clue Lara has a massive crush on her boyfriend! Lara likes to be different from others and maintain her own sense of aesthetic appearance – choosing clothes that represent her true self, rather than fitting in with what everyone else likes to wear, but also being sensitive to criticism. She prefers to act out her emotions, but also shows a lot of inferior Te throughout the film – establishing “dating rules,” a schedule, reasoning out that they may or may not be still “fake dating” by the time something rolls around, etc.

Perceiving Functional Axis:

Extroverted Intuition (Ne) / Introverted Sensing (Si)

She’s a dreamer more than a doer, someone who idealizes and romanticizes relationships in her mind rather than actively pursuing them, until her little sister throws her into the middle of the dating scene (so she doesn’t have to feel “guilty” for staying at home and babysitting her on Saturday nights). Lara has a sentimental streak, and clings to the past in keeping all her old letters, even after her romantic feelings for those boys have worn off. She’s’ quick to leap to conclusions, but also reluctant to try things she’s never done before – and she falls back on relying on her sister to “solve her hot tub problem,” since she knows her sister is better at it than she is. She lives in a general state of chaos, since she pays less attention to her environment than her thoughts.

Hogwarts House: Hufflepuff

House Traits: hard work, patience, loyalty, and fair play.

Another girl might leap at the chance to swoop in on her sister’s old boyfriend… but Lara Jean doesn’t… out of loyalty. She feels she has to be the big sister now, and take care of her family. She often uses cooking and housework as excuses not to leave her comfort zone. Lara is more comfortable at home.

Enneagram: 9w1 sp/sx

Tritype: 945 The Contemplative [9w1 4w5 5w6]

Lara has … taken her time with everything, and doesn’t want to leave her comfort zone. The thought of speaking to a boy and sharing her true feelings fills her with so much anxiety, she writes out her thoughts and stows them in a box in her closet, so she doesn’t have to face the discomfort of potential rejection. She becomes more and more anxious when guys start commenting on her letters and threatening her sense of peace, so she retreats first into “safe” zones (her house) and then establishes “rules” for the “fake dating.” She doesn’t like conflict nor to hurry things along. Her 1 wing makes her want to do the right thing and uncomfortable with lying to others and/or being intimate in ways that aren’t authentic. She must push through her natural desire to keep herself safe and comfortable, and her desire to form a relationship, before she can figure out and express what she truly wants.

Note: Her “fake!” boyfriend is an ISTP. Enneagram unknown. Her older sister is an STJ, her younger sister seems to be an EP. Maybe ENTP.

[sophygurl]

WisCon 43 panel Antisemitism at WisCon

   Over the course of its existence, there have been many examples of antisemitism at WisCon—a trend often echoed in other leftist spaces, where microaggressions to naked hostility to just plain erasure keep occurring. Let's talk about why this continues to happen, why it's so rarely talked about, and what we can do to prevent it.

Moderator: Becky Allen. Panelists: Gerri Balter, Paul Goodman, Jessica Plummer

Disclaimers: These are only the notes I was personally able to jot down on paper during the panel. I absolutely did not get everything, and may even have some things wrong. Corrections by panelists or other audience members always welcome. I name the mod and panelists because they are publicly listed, but will remove/change names if asked. I do not name audience members unless specifically asked by them to be named. If I mix up a pronoun or name spelling or anything else, please tell me and I’ll fix it!

[Quick Notes: 1) This panel was created in large part (though not exclusively) due to a panel that I also attended last year and wrote my notes up about - which can be found here for my tumblr post and here for my DW post - each having their own replies/comments for anyone who wants to see those. The panel last year, called The Desire for Killable Bodies, went sideways when one of the panelists started spouting nazi apologism and other awful things. There’s a context for all of this, which is why I’m linking to my panel write-ups as they served as a space for others to share what they heard and experienced so that you can understand this context and also understand that this wasn’t just a couple of people upset - there was a large audience for this panel and lots and lots of us were upset, and lots of us made reports to the concom, and there is a consensus about what happened. 2) I add all of this because the panel I’m about to write up also had a disturbance in regards to what happened last year and I want to make sure there is full context for what happened with That, as well. 3) Also of note: I had to edit out the tags “nazis” and “antisemitism” for my linked post to appear in my own tags on my own tumblr blog so fuck that noise. I’m getting angrier and angrier about tumblr’s tagging rules - we should be able to tag shit like that for content warnings for fuck’s sake. Anyway, on to the actual write-up. 4) Well, one last note - the panel is, obviously, talking about incidents of experienced antisemitism at both WisCon and in other leftist spaces and it was hard for me, who is not Jewish, to take that all in. So be prepared that this is a difficult, but very important, conversation about to be reported on.]

Notes:

Becky began the panel by saying she was both sad and glad to be doing this. Everyone on this panel is Jewish, and everyone on the panel has experienced antisemitic microaggressions here at WisCon at some point or another.

Jessica said the incident last year was the most extreme one, but certainly not the first.

Paul introduced himself as a lawyer for public policy at a non-profit and said that he has experienced antisemitism here and in every progressive space he’s ever been in.

Gerri introduced herself saying that she is 74 years old and that she has experienced antisemitism her whole life. Her parents escaped the Ukraine after WWI and she grew up hearing horror stories.

Becky gave some background on what happened at the Killable Bodies panel last year. She added that safety did a good job at handling things after it all happened. 

Jessica added that she proposed this panel due to what happened at that panel.

At this point, someone in the audience popped in, asking if we were going to talk about the specifics of that panel and arguing about what was really said. It was clear that this person was friends with the panelist who said the offending comments last year and he was defending her and arguing with the panelists about their own experiences at that panel. Both Jessica and Becky worked to shut him down, and I noticed several folks in the audience standing up and getting ready to escort this person out if necessary. Becky finally said that if he kept on, he would have to leave - or he could be quiet and remain and listen. He chose to remain quiet, and remained so for the duration (at least to my knowledge - he was seated a bit away from me, but I didn’t hear any more interruptions, at least). 

Jessica went back to explaining about how she proposed this panel. She was worried there might not be enough people to be on the panel - some of the people she approached had said maybe, to go ahead and suggest the panel and put them on as possibilities. 

[As a side note - there are a couple of ways of staffing a panel like this. One, which is what Jessica did, is to suggest some possible panelists and programming can see about adding them to the list but other people can still volunteer to be on the panel. The other is to hand-staff a panel, which means the person proposing the panel has already specified who should be on the panel and it is otherwise closed to other panelists. This is often done when a panel absolutely has to have a certain demographic - such as a panel like this which necessitates an all Jewish panel or a panel about trans issues where you want everyone on the panel to be trans, etc.]

So, Jessica had gone with that first way and suggested some possible panelists, but there was a mix-up with programming and all of the names of the suggested panelists were listed as panelists, the panel was closed to volunteers, and private communication that Jessica had submitted to programming was also added to the published panel information. 

This was problematic for a number of reasons. One reason is that the people Jessica has suggested were all people in her own friend group, which included mostly people similar to herself. This was keeping voices different from herself from being on the panel, including people marginalized for other reasons. 

Another problem was the listing of names of people who had not decided if they wanted to be on the panel or not. For obvious historical reasons (and the panel gets into this in more detail a little later), public lists of Jewish people causes a lot of anxiety for Jewish folks. 

At this point, Becky and Jessica acknowledged that most microaggressions are not intentional. They don’t think, for example, that programming did any of this on purpose. 

Gerri said that she wasn’t here last year, but that she’s been coming to WisCon for a long time. She said WisCon used to be mostly people talking about books they’ve read. She remembers many years ago when she’d read Wandering Stars: A Jewish Anthology of Fantasy and Science and Fiction by Jack Dann and she was excited to be reading stories about Jews in space. 

Gerri recommended the book to someone at WisCon and that person kind of took a step back and said “I didn’t know you were one of those.” Everyone else in the group walked away, leaving her to confront this on her own. He then asked her if her name was her real name. 

Gerri was raised by parents who were always telling her to get ready for when she was no longer welcomed. But even living in a world with a lot of overt antisemitism, she didn’t really believe them about that until the moment described above.

Paul talked about how 11-20% of Jews in the US are POC, that Jews are poor and middle class at the same rates as everyone else, and that these are things people don’t always understand. He also said they were not going to discuss Israel on this panel, adding there could be a whole entire con just about that, but that one thing that happens, especially in leftist spaces, is a conflation of Israel with Zionism and Zionism with Judaism and Judaism with every individual Jewish person. 

Jessica told about a panel a few years back about Agent Carter. The focus was on the lack of diversity, which was true. But season two heavily implied that Howard Stark came from a Jewish family who had changed their name. The moderator of that panel waved it away as not very important. Jessica, in the audience, had tweeted using the # for the panel about how significant that representation was to her. The mod saw the tweet during the panel and apologized. 

Jessica also said that friends of hers who were not here shared their own stories about incidents involving everything from off-color Anne Frank jokes to serious incidents that were brought to safety. 

Becky said that they all kept repeating that they know most of these things are not malicious, but she wants to acknowledge that they still hurt. She wants people to think harder about these things, but she’s not trying to call specific people out right now. 

Becky added that as a white Jewish person, she’s in a liminal space of privilege and oppression. She notes that leftists do these kinds of microaggressions a lot, but they’re the ones that should care about Not doing them.

Gerri talked about how fandom began with a lot of Jewish people. So when she got into it, she felt it would be safe. Many cons used to have spaces for services programmed in and one even had a Passover room with food they could eat during the holiday. She’s not sure how or when that went away, but she misses it. Some of it might be the lack of ability to accommodate all religions.

Gerri also talked about conversations that end up leading to “those Jews and their banks”. She objects, but has been told she doesn’t understand because she’s Jewish. “I understand I didn’t have toys as a child because we were too poor.” People try and take it back and it can be hard not to just say it’s okay. 

Jessica talked about more of these things people believe falsely about Jewish people. One is the “Christ killer” thing. In a poll she saw, 60% of Americans believe that Jews killed Jesus. Actually - it was the Romans.

Paul said intent in these things doesn’t always matter. For example, he was told Jews make the best lawyers - this is supposed to be a compliment, but it isn’t. 

Paul and Jessica talked about some of the antisemitic dog whistles that people use such as “globalist” and “lizard people” - it used to be “Hollywood.” 

Becky added that there are a lot of fannish memes that use the lizard people one - folks don’t get that it originates from antisemitism. (Example: “I, for one, support our new lizard overlords.”)

Becky also talked about growing up in a small town where hers was the only Jewish family. She was asked if she had horns, and was asked to come to church with friends so that she wouldn’t go to hell. 

Becky said that Jewish people are always in fear of when it might be time to pack up and leave. Trumpism is making that fear feel very real right now. The idea of knowing there are people in her neighborhood who want her dead is hard. But it’s also hard that with the people she organizes with politically - events are often held on Jewish holidays. “I can’t organize on Yom Kippur - I’m too hungry!” 

Jessica talked about a time she was in France and didn’t want to go with friends to the Jewish museum because she didn’t want to telegraph her Jewishness. She grew up in Brooklyn and believed when she was younger that all white people were Jewish. Then she moved to NJ and heard her first Jewish jokes, and learned about “looking Jewish.” 

Jessica told a story about a boy she and her friend both had a crush on. But then she heard this boy make a joke about someone who was Jewish, saying “oh he must be hiding in the oven.” Her friend said it was no big deal and that Jews should get over the holocaust. 

Jessica said that the holocaust was the largest manifestation of antisemitic genocide, but that is because technology allowed it to be. Jewish history is full of examples of genocide. The joke about Jewish holidays is “they tried to kill us, they failed, let’s eat.”

Paul brought up the concept of generational trauma. Even if it hasn’t happened to you or in your lifetime, knowing your culture’s history and being told about it from your elders instills trauma all the same.

Becky posed the question to the panelists of how they would like to see WisCon and other spaces supporting Jewish people.

Paul talked about Jewish holidays not being recognized. Also - when antisemitic microaggressions happen - someone else needs to step in. It can’t only be Jewish people doing the work themselves.

Gerri said to simply think before speaking and if something comes out bad - apologize and mean it. Then work harder at it.

Jessica said she thought the idea of services was a good one. She added that she requested this panel be on a Sunday due to Shabbat.

Jessica would also like more recognition about the pluralism of Jewishness. And generally just more axis of diversity when it comes to all religions.She notes that even discussions of atheism tend to come through a Christian lens. 

Becky said that a lot of things that are considered to be secular or neutral are not. For example: Christmas.

Jessica added she’d like the removal of the phrase Judeo-Christian. It means nothing. If you mean Abrahamic religions, say that, and make sure you’re including Islam. 

Gerri advised asking questions so that you don’t unintentionally hurt people.

Becky talked about a panel this year about Crazy Ex-Girlfriend and The Good Place. Someone had said that Judaism was not used in the main character on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. Becky had raised her hand to say that no, her Judaism was important. The panelist apologized and admitted they were out of their lane. It was a good exchange. If something is said wrong in good faith - it’s not an issue for it to be brought up.

Jessica added that one of the core values of Judaism is asking questions. 

That said, Becky said it was time for audience questions but set some guidelines first. No talking about Israel, as that’s a derail. No oppression olympics. The panelists are allowed to stop or to just not answer if they wish. And there will be no denying any of the panelists experiences. 

The first audience question was about how to better understand Jewish experiences. 

Gerri didn’t have a specific rec because each book or perspective is just one out of many.

Jessica talked about the difficulty in rec-ing a list of Jewish authors without creating a Nazi hit list. But she added that a lot of our pop culture is Jewish - comic books, comedy, musical theater, etc. 

Gerri rec’d an old movie - Gentleman’s Agreement with Gregory Peck. 

Paul said that a useful exercise is when watching media and a Jewish character is on screen - how are we being treated? Often, it’s not good. 

An audience member rec’d the wikipedia article on antisemitism. 

Becky said - what if we stopped having space Jews who are greedy, such as the Ferengi. 

Jessica said the only good Jews in space is Mel Brook’s Jews in Space.

Someone in the audience discussed the conspiracy theories about cabals and Jewish people having secret privilege. This undercuts the actual oppression of Jewish people. Antisemitism is getting bolder again, so we have to be more loud about confronting it. There is a culture of assimilation due to the fear of “being on the list” and the trauma around that. The audience member acknowledged they were layering questions within questions, but Jessica said “no, this is very Jewish, keep going!” 

Gerri said that when she was growing up, Jews were loud. Her mom would tell her to be more quiet or they’ll think you’re Jewish. She was like, well I am Jewish! But there can be a real fear that being loud might cause you to die. 

Paul recommends punching Nazi’s every day. 

Jessica advised allies to ask how to best support. She gave the example of the triple parenthesis issue on twitter, which was something supremacists were using to designate people they thought were Jewish. Some people started using the triple parenthesis on purpose in protest, but this was very upsetting to a lot of Jewish people due, again, to the issue of the list, being publicly Jewish, the generational trauma there, etc. Jessica said to speak for Jewish people when necessary, but never over them.

Becky asked the panelists for last words or rec’s.

Gerri said Isaac Asimov

Paul said there are lots of resources at Jews for Racial and Economic Justice.

Becky said Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, also the author Katherine Locke - specifically The Girl with the Red Balloon, a time travel book with Jewish characters. 

Jessica said there are too few YA speculative fiction books with Jewish characters. She does recommend early comics by Stan Lee, Jack Kirby, etc. Superman, Spider-Man, and others are all based on Jewish themes. She also recommended the first Independence Day movie and Rose Lerner’s romance novels. 

And that’s all I got! Also my last write-up for this year. The other panels I attended, I just didn’t get enough decent notes down to make a write-up worthwhile. Might make a round-up post and add some comments on the panels I was on, but not sure. 

[sherlollysecretsanta]

Situational Obliviousness

This is the mod fanfic gift for @ukthxbye , who wanted a certain sentence used in a Sherlolly fic.

“That’s probably just how it is.” Molly sighed as she sipped her tea and turned to look at her brother-in-law. I will never manage to surprise Sherlock, no matter how hard I try. And trust me, I have tried. He is worse than a little boy at Christmas sniffing around under the tree.”

Mycroft smiled slightly at that. She could see that was an apt description of Sherlock. Quite possibly, that was what he had been like as a boy; Sherlock didn’t have many concrete memories of his childhood, thanks to the conditioning done after his poor little friend’s death. Now, he was piecing together things with the help of his brother, but yes. It had lead to some very sleepless nights while Sherlock had doubts about a great number of things.

But never her. Never them. And she was so eternally grateful that one good thing had come out of this mess.

“What, exactly, are you trying to keep a secret from him?” Mycroft asked before taking a sip of his own tea. “Your upcoming blessing?”

Molly’s eyes widened and then she glared at Mycroft. “If you say one word, Mycroft, I swear, I’ll stick your umbrella up your arse...with the sword uncovered.”

He chuckled. “Trust me, Sherlock is oblivious. He thinks you’re keeping a different secret, that you’re leaving your post. You could wave the test under his knows and maybe then he’d realize your frequent sick days aren’t a protest, it’s morning sickness.”

The mere mentions of the words “morning sickness” gave her stomach a lurch and she made a face. “I am not suited for pregnancy.”

“I know of many top obstetrics and gynecology doctors. Most of them female. When Andrea had her child, she researched everyone in the country. I’m sure she’ll share with you.”

“How is she, by the way? Have you seen her since she left your service?” Molly asked.

Mycroft nodded. “She asked me to be the godfather.”

“Oh, that’s wonderful!” she said. “And you did say yes, right?”

“Not yet.” He frowned. “What could I possibly offer her son that she won’t already give him?”

“A safe place in case anything happens to his mum or dad,” Molly said, reaching over to pat Mycroft’s hand. “That’s what I gave Rosie, after everything with Mary, when John simply couldn’t. And you’ll care about him, I know you will, as much as you’ll care about your niece or nephew.” She finished her tea and then set the cup down before getting up and kissing Mycroft’s cheek. “I suppose I better tell him so he doesn’t wear a rut in the carpet thinking he’ll need another pathologist. Well, full time, anyway. He will when I’m on maternity leave.”

“I’m sure that won’t occur to him right away,” Mycroft said wryly, kissing her cheek in return. She rather did enjoy tea with her brother-in-law; it was a holdover from their time when Sherlock was away, and it was a nice bit of relaxation with excellent tea and Mycroft’s cheat days allowed from some yummy treats, though today she’d abstained. She really didn’t think herself suited for pregnancy.

She made her way home to Baker Street and when she got in, she saw Sherlock with sheet music all around him, scribbling a few notes here and there. She moved behind him staring over his shoulder. “Anything interesting?” she asked.

“I haven’t been able to get this out of my head,” he said.

“What kind of tune is it?” she asked as she tilted her head.

“A soft piece. Something...soothing, I suppose,” He looked up at her. “Enjoy tea with the ice lord?”

“As usual, yes,” she said, leaning over and dropping a kiss in his hair. “Though not as much as usual. The thought of sweets today made me feel ill.”

Sherlock frowned. “So you’re really ill? You’re not just staging a sick out?”

She nodded. “Morning sickness is a right pain in the arse, it really is.” She pointed to the music. “Would that make a good lullaby? Because we might need one in eight months or so. Give or take.”

She watched as the last few sentences she’d said whirred about in his head and his brain struggled to compete. “Morning...sickness?” he finally got out.

She nodded again. “Common side effect of pregnancy, yes. We might want to make sure we stay stocked in saltines, at least until the first trimester is over. After that, I’ll probably have to consult an OB/GYN if I’m still having issues. Andrea has a list of the best in the country, apparently.”

Sherlock scrambled to his feet and gently placed his hands on either side of her waist, looking down, before moving to frame her face, a wide smile blooming on his face. “You’re pregnant?” he asked, his tone a happy one of wonder.”

“Yes,” she said with a soft chuckle. “About a month, I think, only because I haven’t done blood work to confirm.” She was going to say more but he swooped in for a kiss, gently pulling her against him, and she kissed him back, wrapping her arms around his neck. “So,” she continued when he was done snogging her. “You’re happy?”

“Very.”

“Good.” She gave him another quick peck on the lips. “Then go tell people. I’ll let you share the good news with your mum and Dad and John and Greg. I’ll tell everyone else.” He gave her another quick kiss and then went for his mobile. Yes, he was beaming and quite happy but as Mycroft had said, he was quite oblivious to the fact, and she idly wondered if they ever went through this again if she could surprise him twice...

Also @ AO3

[thewayofthetrashcompactor]

chapter one on ao3

Rating: T (M later) Words: 1950 / 40k Tags: Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Finn, Rose Tico, Unkar Plutt, Leia Organa, Snoke, Alternate Universe - Modern with Magic, Fairy Tale Elements, Moon, Scavenger Rey, Reylo Fanfiction Anthology, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rating May Change

Summary: Rey has a busy schedule: between her part time jobs, trying to get a degree, and breaking into certain people's homes to steal items she can pawn off to Unkar Plutt, she doesn't have time for anything mysterious or unusual. And she's not exactly in the habit of returning lost property.

However, something gets her to make an exception. Which somehow mixes her up with Ben Solo, and that turns out to be a hard bond to break.

Notes: I’m so excited to share my fic for this year’s @reylofanfictionanthology! Thank you so, so much to everyone involved in this. To all our writers, you are amazing and make this project as incredible as it is. To my fellow mods, you are lovely people who have put so much work into this. I never cease to be impressed. And thank you to everyone reading this! This project has been about six months in the making, and we are all so excited to be able to present this collection!

Thank you also to @shelikespretties and @shmisolo for going through this, and @persimonne for taking the time to read this when I was about to give up and convincing me it was worth finishing. You are wonderful <3

-

Rey disabled the alarm on the back window through the crack between the frames, pulled it up, and slipped inside. The plush carpet made no sound as she landed, and she closed the window behind her. The full moon shone through the window, casting a silver glow on the luxurious furnishings. A buzzing excitement rolled over her as she took stock of the room she found herself in.

She’d heard the new wave of crime that people were supposed to worry about wasn't the stereotypical burglar in a catsuit breaking into the house in the middle of the night or any of those old-fashioned criminals that made their living with soft steps and quick fingers. Now it was all maintenance workers in disguise and online scams, the kind of things that could get much better rewards with less effort than painstakingly picking open locks. She, however, preferred the classics.

(cont. under the cut)

The room was almost exactly what she'd expected from a sleazebag like Snoke. Thick dark carpet, walls draped in fabric, and a bed that looked like it was covered in the same material as the man's infamous golden suit. She nearly gagged. Oozing wealth, but no taste. Not that she'd know anything about that. Still, she didn't feel too bad about dipping into the man's bloated riches to help keep herself afloat. He was out at one of his monthly meetings that night, something she’d watched him leave for regularly for a few months now, likely rubbing elbows with other criminals as disgusting as he was.

She started at the dresser, a heavy thing made of dark wood inlaid with gold and pearl and with various boxes and jewelry scattered carelessly across the top. Her gloved hands picked through the offerings, taking small pieces here and there, rings or chains that looked less worn or that sat at the bottom of a pile, things he likely wouldn't miss. Scrunching her face in disgust, she quickly rummaged through his sock and underwear drawers, but didn't turn up anything interesting. She retrieved a watch and a couple jeweled tie pins from another drawer, then faced the room again.

The closet was worth a brief look, but she could save that for last. The bed first then. She pulled up the skirt to look underneath, but the frame went all the way to the floor, and knocking around it didn’t turn up any hiding places. She turned to the chest at the foot of the bed, an older piece with engravings of oceans in the light wood. It looked incongruous in the rest of the room, like someone had actually put care into its creation. A lock secured the front, but it was easy enough to pick that. She pushed back the lid, hoping to find a safe or something equally as worthwhile. Instead, a heap of dark fur sat alone inside.

She picked it up, frowning. The fur slid soft and silky under her hands as she stood and shook it out. It turned out to be a coat, slightly too large for her, but not at all shaped for Snoke's gaunt and towering frame either. It looked strangely inviting, and all she wanted to do was to take it with her and wrap it around herself, snuggling into it.

The thought was a completely ridiculous one. The coat would suit her as well as anything else from Snoke's indulgent garbage. It looked luxurious and definitely expensive, but not worth trying to bundle it back out of the house with her. Still, it was an odd thing for Snoke to keep locked up and so close at hand.

Rey sighed, letting it slip through her fingers and fall back into the chest. As it landed, she heard the crinkle of paper and quickly bent over to find what it was. She dug through the pockets until her hand reached a scrap of stationery, which she pulled out and spread on the edge of the chest. The paper looked old and slightly the worse for wear, but the words printed on it were easily legible:

Ben Solo

415-623-1000

Rey's heart skipped a beat. The handwriting was clearly a child's, clumsy and unpracticed, with lines pressed deep in the paper where he must have been concentrating. The ‘S’ could nearly be an eight and the zeroes ran into each other. But the name and number were understandable, and the intention was obvious. She'd done something similar for her prized possessions as a child, such as they were: a faded ‘R’ scrawled in marker on the foot of the doll she'd made from scraps, and when she was older, ‘Rey Niima’ written carefully on her beat-up copy of ‘The Little Princess’ she'd stolen from her classroom. She hadn’t wanted to commit to the phone number of her latest home, so she’d settled from writing under it: “If found, please return”. Her hands clenched on the paper, wrinkling it. She didn't know who ‘Ben Solo’ was, but she'd be willing to bet he didn't belong within a thousand feet of Snoke at any time.

She tried to set the coat back. Even if something was wrong here, which it very likely was, she couldn't do anything about it. Having the coat would just get her in trouble, one way or another. She was here to get herself through another month, not involve herself in any of Snoke’s notoriously sketchy dealings. Yet, even with all of that logic, she couldn't close the lid and let it go.

With a growl, she gathered the coat up and pulled it out of the chest, then closed the lid and locked it again before she could reconsider. Scowling the whole time, she bundled the fur into her bag and tied it to her back. As she eased herself back out the window, she couldn't help but feel like she was going to regret this.

(read the rest on ao3!)

[altscifi]

Just When You Thought it Was Over: Fighting Back Against Bullying and Continued Harassment Across Social Media (on Twitter, Facebook, Reddit and Tumblr)

This story is worth telling because it just keeps getting better.

And by better, the meaning is "worse".

You might want to catch up on the 10 Everyday Information Warfare Tactics You've Already Fallen For - and the case of the AltSciFi zine project (the number has grown to 15 tactics, with examples illustrating how they're used).

Here's a timeline of the past year or so:

Our Tumblr blog reaches ~1,500 subscribers (unlike AltSciFi Twitter, the Tumblr follower count is not curated, so many followers are probably bots). The AltSciFi Tumblr blog has several hundred posts accumulated over at least four years.

A prototype of the AltSciFi gallery/store site is posted to GitHub. Four out of 15 pages have working PayPal links, but the site is obviously not complete. Hint: it's on GitHub -- a site for programming and web development, not e-commerce; 11 pages have no links at all.

The attack begins on Twitter. An artist finds the GitHub site. The artist (we'll call her "MiraKillian") does not contact AltSciFi, but instead creates a Twitter slander/libel attack about how AltSciFi is "stealing art". This attack spreads across social media. Many artists on Twitter use copyright-trolling this way to earn "clout". In this case, MiraKillian is a member of a gang called "The (Twitter) Artist Community" who obsessively Like and Retweet each other's posts to get more magical "clout". Ironically, the Like/Retweet game rewards the best narcisssists and biggest bullies who rise to become "Influencers", some of whom act like megalomanaical miniature Harvey Weinsteins lording their imaginary status over less-popular followers who beg for "signal boosts", prostrating themselves to win the Influencers' favour.

AltSciFi is accused of "promoting" the unfinished site via Tumblr. The Tumblr blog's homepage is the only one that links back to the Github site, since that page was used for testing Tumblr's layout. The Github pages that have PayPal links aren't connected anywhere on the homepage at all -- meaning that no one could find them in any case. (And in case you've ever tried to sell anything via social media, it's a complete waste of time unless you have an extremely specific niche, or ten of thousands of followers. AltSciFi had neither of those, since we haven't publicly marketed, promoted, or launched the zine yet.)

The slander/libel attack reaches GitHub. One sci-fi makeup artist whose work was posted to the AltSciFi Github test site submitted a mostly-false DMCA takedown notice. GitHub never investigates, but rather automatically posts all DMCA takedown notices. This creates the illusion of "guilt" -- but also puts the makeup artist in legal jeopardy for libel based on her own gullibility.

A few months later, MiraKillian's name appears above the title of a cyberpunk webcomic created by a popular artist (we'll call her "Miirai") who has been publicly scammed quite recently. Miirai has built a public persona around being shy and trusting, which makes her the perfect target for yet another scam. This time, MiraKillian has taken over drawing Miira's webcomic along with one other artist, while Miirai herself begs her followers on social media for money to "support" the comic due to repetitive-stress injuries (art is hard work). That is a well-known tactic called a "sympathy scam".

The slander/libel attack reaches Reddit. Nona goes on Reddit and creates a topic to ask, "would you raise funds to help Miirai get proper medical attention for her injuries?" One of Miirai's new "team" appears and lies that Miirai is still creating art for the cyberpunk webcomic herself, which contradicts what she wrote on recent entries of her own blog about being disabled due to her injuries.

The slander/libel attack poisons a Reddit community. A day later, Miirai herself shows up and defends MiraKillian, making up a conspiracy theory about how a fake Patreon account claimed to be her -- therefore it must have secretly been AltSciFi! And the idea about her being scammed is "fake news"! (Note: a key tactic in any scam, obviously, is to gain the confidence and complicity of a vulnerable person.)

The slander/libel attack poisons a subreddit's moderators. The subreddit in which this conversation takes place starts arbitrarily deleting Nona's posts about the topic. Nona quickly narrows down exactly which moderator was likely the culprit based on who was active on Reddit when the most recent post was taken down, and asks a different moderator to deal with it.

Instead of disciplining the culprit, the moderator starts bullshitting, trying to make the problem about Nona instead. Nona contacted the moderator using a relatively new account to create distance from the attackers who are on Reddit. The moderator used that as an excuse, saying "creating alt accounts and posting about the same thing repeatedly is 'suspicious'." The mod also lied that adding links to further information about the incident was "spamming", and intentionally misinterpreted Reddit's rules (do not post the same comment repeatedly) to mean, "do not post about similar topics more than once".

The Reddit admins do nothing. Nona messages the Reddit admins. A week passes. No response.

Note: on that same subreddit, Nona previously posted a topic about the zine, and a well-known copyright troll appeared, spamming the comments section. After Nona reported the troll's comments, Nona was banned for "spamming the moderators". So Nona wrote a blog entry about it, and two years later, another artist commented on the blog that they were dealing with the same idiot. It's been _two years_ and the moderators of that subreddit are still allowing the troll to use their sub as his personal toilet for trolling. So much for "just ignore the trolls."

So you can see that as this story unfolds, it shows how much of a sham the idea of "free speech" really is on social media. Tribalism by a small, aggressive group of motivated (and mostly illiterate) bullies (the "Artist Community" on Twitter, who are actually just a few hundred idiots who are heavy Twitter users) spreads into an internet-wide disinformation campaign.

TL;DR The fallacy of "free speech" on the modern internet is a question of what is deleted or people who are bullied into silence. You can't know what's missing if you never see it in the first place.

Sounds like the perfect starting point for a dystopian sci-fi story, doesn't it?

The AltSciFi project is now fully dedicated to the fight against misinformation, disinformation, internet bullying and copyright trolling. The AltSciFi concept is only the beginning. We are here especially to support members of maginalised communities online (nonwhite, women, LGBT as well as non-neurotypical and older users). A safe and empowering internet for marginalised users creates a better internet for everyone.

If you want more information about ongoing and upcoming efforts to help independent artists and fans like you to create a better internet, send a DM -- or email altscifi at tutanota dot com.

P.S. Keep fighting for net neutrality. If we stop fighting, copyright trolling will become multinational corporate law, and the open web will effectively cease to exist. In other words, welcome to a real cyberpunk dystopia. The only way to stop that from happening is to create a better future for ourselves, since no one else will do it for us.

[neth-dugan]

Nine Worlds - Saturday

Friday found [here]

I got a full night’s sleep! I was still tired but it wasn’t too bad. I think I grabbed a nap at some point between panels but for the life of me I can’t say for sure when. Just that I really needed it. It was also the first day when I sat on or ran a panel.

ALCHEMY AND CHEMISTRY IN SF/FANTASY

This ended up being more about the history of chemistry and alchemy through time with a few examples of how it isn’t done accurately in either SF or Fantasy. Not what I was expecting, to be sure, but I still enjoyed it. I recognised a lot of it from a programme about the history of science and chemistry by Prof Jim Al Khalili on the BBC. The person presenting used to teach Chemistry and thus knew their stuff.

My only concern is that they said they were probably going to take longer than the slot assigned to them willy nilly like. Which. People have to get to things. Thankfully volunteers do pop their head in near the end of the slot if needed and it over ran a bit but not by too much. 

Something that is important to note, and that not many realise but the presenter here made sure people knew, is that alchemy and chemistry aren’t that different in many ways. It isn’t like astrology and astronomy. Alchemy is where chemistry came from, like its ancestor, more than anything else, and there was this period of transition where it gradually grew from alchemy into what we realise as the modern day science of chemistry. 

HARRY POTTER AND THE CURSED CHILD APPRECIATION

... behind the scenes footage of the first cast rehearsing the play. Clemmett as Albus and Boyle as Scorpius. Not in costume/wig but look at Albus glomping his best mate. Look!

I went to see this play when it was still new, when we had to keep the secret safe and before the script was published. I loved it. I remember the little girl next to me in utter awe about the stage as we walked in. I remember of the Dementor flying just above my head. The thump that got you in your core as time travel took place. Adoring Scoripus so so much. My heart breaking during the scene with Albus and Scorpius on the stairs, and with the cast at the end when they must let events play out. And I remember learning that a lot of Potter fans weren’t a big fan of the play. 

So when I got an e-mail asking if I’d be willing to be on a panel about appreciating Cursed Child? I was all in. And when we were trying to figure out who would mod it I volunteered and so it began. 

It was a great panel. Me who had only seen it, not read it. Someone who’d only read it. People who’d done both. People who know a lot about plays and how they work and theatre and the like. 

We talked about the legacy of pressure of family, how that impacted Albus and Scorpius, and how there was these two stories - the kids and the adults. How we think it works that the characters aren’t these perfect adults and parents who do no wrong. Harry has a lot of trauma that the others around him don’t and that brushes up against the plot and also the needs Albus himself has. It’s messy and we think it works. There was also a lot of discussion around how it works as a play, how that makes it different from a book and the impact this probably had on reception. Play texts are fundamentally different from traditional prose and this can make it hard for those not used to reading them, who don’t know how to literally read between the lines. And we had huge appreciation for the stage craft from all sides of production.

I’m not turning this into a blow by blow of the panel. But there was a lot of love for the play. And considering this panel was up against the Black Panther panel? I think we did well. I am sad I didn’t get to go to the Black Panther panel but Nine worlds has not yet invented time travel so alas. I had a lot of fun, I hope others did too.

TOP OF THE SFF COPS

...tragically nobody mentioned Odo until I suggested him at the end. So I’m sticking him in here.

This panel is slightly infamous at this point, and going in I had no idea. Whilst I knew there were issues with a separate panel and a serving police officer being placed on it, I didn’t know this one would blow up. So far as I knew there’d been a similar one last year and I’d only heard good things. I also know that I have a lot of privilege being white and despite being queer I pass.... but I’ll go into that in a separate post later. Will post a link here when up.

A lot of genre fiction has police or security type characters in it. From X-Files to Star Trek to Discworld to Alien Nation and way way more. And like many professions who are portrayed on TV or otherwise intersect with it a lot (doctors, archeologists, writers, scientists) a lot of it isn’t done particularly accurately. So a group of people who work in law enforcement in various ways decided to do a session on which characters do their actual job best and in line with actual standards. It was made clear that they were there on a personal basis and not as an on duty or official representative type thing. 

They put forth a set of criteria - things like knows the law, exercises discretion, compassion, does the day to day hard work and not just the action stuff and so on. Mulder? Is right out. Scully however was in, and the only character I recognised. So I was mostly went by who sounded the best and it ended up being the guy from Discworld who wont the vote. I don’t know the books well though so who knows. This was literally the entire panel. Still, I can see in retrospect how it would make some people uncomfortable.

It was an okay panel. I wasn’t expecting it to be a big vote thing, and more of a discussion type thing but in hindsight  that may have caused more issues. 

LET THE PAST DIE: SACRIFICING SACRED COWS IN STAR WARS THE LAST JEDI

This was put into a room far too small for what it needed to be. People were crowding in and it wasn’t great. Not long after it started a volunteer came in and offered up the room across the hall that had way more seating, so we voted on it and unsurprisingly we moved across. This would have been easier for some to do than others but it also have people who needed more space that space whilst letting people in. But it likely caused issues for those who have a harder time moving. I’d had a big dizzy spell on my way to this but seemed to be okay moving. 

Part way through I decided to start live tweeting it and you can find that HERE. I’m not really sure what else to add but it was an interesting panel. Lots of talk about letting whiney fanboys whine to themselves, a lot of stuff they keep going on about was also in or also missing from the original trilogy. Nobody explained Palpatine until the prequel trilogy after all. He just turned up as a vague big bad when needed for plot. One panelist wished them the prequel trilogy ‘they deserve’ which amused me.

What I found most interesting though was a note on the green milk scene with Luke. I’ve seen people joke and deride that scene a lot since the movie came out. But one of the panelists, a woman from with roots in Hong Kong, said that it really struck a chord with her in relation to the diaspora. It reminded her of going into Tesco and finally seeing a noodle that isn’t exactly the same but reminds her a lot of something from home. And this was Luke claiming something that reminds him of where he came from even as he’s far away from it. It had honestly never occurred to me but it makes so much sense, and gives that scene a lot more value. I have no idea if the writers did that on purpose or if they did it as the easy joke though.

LAYERS OF MEANING: THE DIMENSIONAL DIFFERENCES BETWEEN ENGLISH, CHINESE, AND SIGN LANGUAGE

I loved this! This was hosted by a woman who was born in China and whose first language is Mandarin, but moved to Britain as a kid and later in life learnt BSL and now works as a sign language interpreter. She does this for Nine Worlds in various panels, as well as hosting a few sessions relating this to herself. And so she decided to do a panel that talks about her three languages as they’re all very different and go at language in different ways.

It was awesome.

...Mulan is not at all relevant but she is Chinese this is the best gif I could find that is both nerdy and has the writing system talked about in this session. And also, y’know, Mulan.

She isn’t a linguist, which she made sure everyone knew. But I think that made it work. It was also kinda amused because on the front row on one half of the aisle was a native speaker of BSL, and on the front row of the other half was someone who knows Mandarin better and I get the feeling probably came from a different part of the Chinese speaking world. But I’m just assuming there. And the interplay between the three was informative but also amusing.

I kinda knew the general concepts of what she was talking about. Or very vague versions of the concepts anyway. English is phonetic and the letters themselves have no meaning. D implies nothing when used in dog or door etc and it can be polysyllabic. Mandarin is logarithmic, it’s tonal and uses that rather than multiple syllables and it doesn’t have individual letters. The symbol for ‘female, woman’ 女 but as a radical can become a part of words like ‘calm/peace’ 安 which has the radicals for woman and home. Which, being at home is calming so I get that. There are also some not great words with woman as a radical too. 

And then there is sign language which doesn’t have just the mouth to speak. It has two hands, your face and your mouth. It takes place in a 3D space and adjectives are often included as part of the word, not separate to it. You can say entire sentences with a gesture, and you pick up on ways of expressing things because they look interesting in the same way you’d vocalise something a certain way because it sounds nice..

It was interesting. I don’t know a lot about language, and anything too technically worded would have lost me. But this didn’t and this was another of my favourite panels this year.

THE POLITICS OF ACTIVISM IN MARVEL COMICS

So I don’t know a lot about the comics. I’ve read a couple Wolverine books but that is about it. But I thought I’d go along and listen cause it seemed interesting. Jaime was hosting it, someone who’d worked on the comics was meant to be there but had to pull and out and so Jaime was left by themselves but... Jaime did a good job. 

A lot of the specifics were beyond me. But it seemed to be a common theme that activism within the comics would change the world too much beyond the baseline - a baseline that needed to remain stable. And a fear of how the much vaulted cis het white male would take it I’d imagine though I don’t remember that being touched on a lot.

I did comment at one bit. I tried to do a ‘I only really know the movies so maybe this is stated in-verse’ type of disclaimer and then was given what felt a bit like I’d been shot down with ‘comics only!’ despite others bringing MCU up before including by the mod. If they hadn’t, I’d have said nothing at all. But I may have just been a bit sensitive. In any case, I wondered if perhaps the characters did do things, within the parameters of their non-hero lives. Tony Stark is the CEO of a massive company after all, maybe he funds charities, treats workers well and make sure workers rights are a thing etc, invests responsibly. I dunno. And we just don’t see it much because it isn’t about punching people. I don’t remember a lot of what was said after that as I was too busy berating myself for daring to speak in a comics panel. Note to self, never go to one again, it is not meant for me. The vague idea I had about an X-Men as metaphor panel for next year? Likely wont submit that now.

But it was well moderated. People got a chance to speak, bounce ideas around and I think what I said was taken in as part of that. The session didn’t get stuck on one thing and it flowed through topics and ideas and the like and it was interesting. Except for that one moment I did genuinely enjoy it. Given the last minute alterations due to a key component having to drop out it was very well done.

... why do tumblr gifs all have to be so big? 

DR MAGNETHANDS

This is kind of hard to describe, but it was very adult friendly, It had Captain Picard with swearing crashing the moon onto London, and Theresa May as a monster head fighting against a butterfly made out of lamb chops in some kind of anti-Brexit accidental metaphor. Especially as the lamb chop butterfly was a heroic character that Theresa treated as a bad guy.  Everyone boo’d her at every turn.

It’s kinda hard to describe in any logical way what this session was like. Drawn off of audience suggestions and participation it’s basically crack fic made manifest.

... giant jellyfish in the sky didn’t happen, but were a distinct possibility.

It was just pure fun really. I laughed a lot, I had a great time, it was awesome.

SEX AT HOGWARTS

Another session that needed a bigger room. I got there pretty early and so had a good seat and then being a tad hyper I decided the room needed mood music. So I searched for romantic music in Spotify and played it. This is whilst the room was mostly empty and I did stop before the session started. Those who could actually hear it seemed amused. Not sure if it was at me or the music. And there were lots of tipsy people around.

We were also graced with Professor McGonagall who visited us and gave us all a good staring at. 

Much like the late night panel on Friday, it was a pretty lively discussion with lots of absurdity and very clearly adult only. There was a sensible power point that combined info released after the books about who was dating who, comics and some parodies of what sex ed at Hogwarts might look like. It’s not what I’d have done but given it’s slot it worked out pretty well.

...given the topic, probably best to have a gif of adult characters. Also it’s cute.

There was discussion of what counts as bestiality in a world where all sorts of beings are sentient. I even posited the question that if someone kept up with polyjuice for nine months, could someone usually lacking a uterus become pregnant and give birth? This was laughed down and dismissed as it was meant to. Think it was kinda obvious in how I delivered it that I was being absurd. There was a lot of speculation of what portraits get up to and.... yeah. it was exactly as it sounds.

A lot of fun, and probably nothing teens haven’t heard or thought before but still, a good thing they weren’t there.

I’d have liked to go to bar and play Slash but alas, I was tired so I went to bed. Hoping for sleep and rather sad that the next day would be my last for another year.

[SUNDAY HERE]

[tonystarkbingo]

Week 4 Roundup

Name of Piece The Botanical Garden by @duckmoles Square Filled S4: Crossover Rating teen Warnings demons, identity porn Summary Tony Stark/Steve Rogers (light)

Steve doesn’t know Tony Stark very well. After a battle, it turns out that he knows even less than he thought.

A daemon au.

Mod Tisfan Commentary Cute piece, if you like daemon AUs... little bit of identity porn and a little bit of Steve being a snoop 

Name of Piece The Futurist and the Stonekeeper by @rinnwrites Square Filled T2 - Drabble Rating Gen Warnings light angst Summary   Tony Stark/Stephen Strange

The Futurist & The Stonekeeper turn from what is there, and hold fast to what is here.

Mod Tisfan Commentary Cute, very poetic. 

Name of Piece Dear Thor, You’re Still a Dick by @dracusfyre Square Filled K5 - Five Things Rating not rated Warnings epistolary format Summary Loki/Tony Stark

Tony writes a letter to Thor and thinks back over the years since he got soul bonded to Loki (AKA Five Things Tony Learned About Loki) For Square K5: Five Things.

Mod Tisfan Commentary I am continuing to enjoy this series.

Name of Piece That’s a Sharp-Ass Knife by @toneestark Square Filled  T1 - Fuck or Die Rating explicit  Warnings dub-con, whump, non-con Summary Tony Stark/Steve Rogers

When a familiar foe captures Tony Stark and co., he makes sure that Tony is hurt in every way possible. Will be multiple chapters. For T1 fill for Tony Stark Bingo 2018: Fuck or Die.

Mod Tisfan Commentary pretty harsh, watch your own mental state. 

Name of Piece: A Year of Gravestones by @mariesbookblog Square Filled: K2 - Graveyard Rating: Teen Warnings: past canon minor character death, minor made-up character death Summary: Graveyards are a good place to think. To find the strength to face the future. Or: After the Civil War, Tony visits the dead.

Mod Tisfan Commentary lovely, and sad

Name of Piece Tony and Jarvis by @toneestark Square Filled S4 - Jarvis Rating gen Warnings none Summary Art of a young Tony Stark looking at JARVIS’s core code. Tony has a screwdriver tucked behind his ear. Caption: Little Tony’s hard work pays off when he finally meets baby JARVIS. Mod Tisfan Commentary this is amazing, I love the colors, both warm and secretive

Title of Piece: One Hand Washes the Other by @tisfan Also on A03 Square filled: A4 - WTF Warning: unrepentant fluff, weird coping mechanisms, first date Pairing: Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes Summary: Bucky doesn’t always eat with the team. It takes Tony a while to figure out why.

Title of Piece: The Weapon-Maker’s Son by @polizwrites Rating: General Audiences Square K5 - Fairy-tale style narration Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Crossover, Gentlemen Bastards Summary: Once upon a time, a man who had everything wanted more. He took a wife, a lovely, talented young woman who he bent to his will. In time, she bore her husband a son and named him Antonio. A brilliant, strong-willed child, Antonio could stand in his father’s shadow only so long.

Mod Tisfan’s Commentary good style, very epic poemish

Title of Piece At Your Own Risk: Chapter 1- Priorities by @dracusfyre On AO3! Square: A1 - Doing Groceries Warning: None (for this chapter) Rating: General (for this chapter) Relationship: Loki/Tony Summary:  When Loki and Tony get stranded on an alien planet, Tony at least has his priorities straight. This chapter is for Square A1: Doing Groceries. Part 4 of Loki Radio, aka the Soul Bond verse, in case you’re like uh wtf is happening.

Mod Tisfan Commentary This was hilarious and I loved it

Name of Piece: Drink Me Down by @27dragons Square Filled: S2 - vampire/werewolf Rating: E Warnings: Sex, Blood-drinking (vampire) Summary: Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes

Of course Bucky’s grateful to Tony for showing him that he doesn’t have to be a monster just because he’s a wyr. But that’s not the full extent of his feelings for the vampire.

Mod Tisfan’s Commentary I love it. vampire, werewolf, pining, Steve being a jerk (in a loving way)... what more could you want?

Name of Piece So I Give You My Life to Keep by @ayapandagirl Square: R4 - arranged marriage Rating: Explicit Warnings: dub-con (magic-induced lust) Summary: Ironstrange, 

The Ancient One came to Tony Stark seeking a husband for student, Stephen Strange.

Mod Tisfan’s Commentary I really enjoyed this piece. So much sass!

Title of Piece: Finding Balance by @tisfan Square: K5 – Innocent until proven guilty Also on A03 Warning: blow job, Anal Sex, barebacking, breakup and get back together, lying, stealing, jealousy issues, mention of intended rape, gambling, Irish AU, caber tosser Bucky, irish dancer Tony Summary: Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes

Tony’s still trying to get his life back on track when he runs into his ex. Bucky, who gambled away a fortune and then stole money from Tony… and then lied about it. Well, Tony’s still trying to find some balance… 

Name of Piece You Broke the Rules by @trammelsb Square A3 - Freespace Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Bruce Banner/Tony Stark Additional Tags: BDSM, Flogging, Dom Bruce, Sub Tony, Dom Bruce Banner, Sub Tony Stark, Self-Hatred

Summary:

Tony looked over at him, eyes wide. Bruce glared at the bruising down his neck from the fall he took in the fight. Bruce wanted nothing more than to grab Tony and hold him for the next week, keep him safe, but that wasn’t what Tony needed right now. What either of them needed. “But, I - I didn’t-” Tony tried to back away but Bruce held him, tugging at his hair. Tony froze. “Mm. You did. You know you did. You broke the rules. You know what happens when you break the rules.”

Mod Tisfan Commentary delicious

Title of Piece You’re Welcome to Try by @wakandan-wardog Rating: General Audiences Square Filled: K4: Nick Fury Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark Additional Tags: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, Voice Acting, Workplace, Fluff, Snark Summary:

Nick finds out that Tony and Steve are dating, and calls Tony into the office to talk about it. Tony takes it about as well as you would expect, but luckily his boyfriend's waiting on a shining motorcycle to speed him away to lunch.

Mod Tisfan Commentary Continuing to enjoy this little bit of fluff series, too

Title of Piece: Negative Space by @duckmoles Square Filled: K3 Character Death Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Major Character Death Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark Additional Tags: Grief/Mourning, Hurt No Comfort, Angst, Clothing Summary: If he closes his eyes and breathes, he can still catch the smell of Tony’s aftershave and shampoo.

Mod Tisfan Commentary I almost skipped reading this because I wasn’t in the mood for death fic, but I’m glad I did. it was lovely and beautiful and very, very sad.

Title of Piece Wedding Dress for Sale (worn once) by @voodoofee Rating: Mature Square: A3 - freesquare Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Tony Stark Additional Tags: Wedding Dress, Amputee Bucky Barnes, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Shy Bucky Barnes, Bucky Barnes Feels, Tony is wearing a dress, crossdressing but not really, it was a bet, but a good bet, now with art!, amazing araydre Summary:

Bucky finds a strange note in the elevator reading, Wedding dress for sale, worn once by mistake, with the number of someone named Tony. Bucky only knows one Tony but he doesn't think that's the guy’s name. Why else should the packages he sometimes receives be addressed to one A. Edward Stark? Whoever it is, Rebecca's wedding is coming soon and he wanted to buy her a dress. Maybe this one fits? He's pretty sure she won't mind that it has already been worn once...

Mod Tisfan Commentary continues to be cute. now with art

Name of Piece A Shard of Fear by @rebelmeg Square Filled: S4 - Reunion Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Additional Tags: Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie), Tony and Nebula: Dark Humor Buddies, James "Rhodey" Rhodes & Tony Stark Friendship, Science Bros, Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Mentions of Major Character Deaths, Blood, Major Character Injury, Thaddeus Ross is a dickwad and Tony shuts him down, Tony Feels, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony is not in a good place, Mentions of Pepperony, Tony willingly going to medical is a bad sign, Tony Stark Bingo 2018, Natasha Romanov Is a Good Bro, Mentions of Iron Dad and his Spider Son, Thor is also not in a good place, neither is clint

Summary:

Picking up immediately where "I Told You So" left off, everyone gets caught up with what has been going on. They're all suffering. They don't know what to do. And Tony is bleeding.

Mod Tisfan Commentary tries not to cry... cries a LOT

Name of Piece Language by @hereandnowwearealive Square Filled R1 - May Parker Rating T and up Warnings language Summary Hypocrits, the both of them

Comic: May Parker and Tony Stark discussing every day events with swear words. Peter almost knocks over a glass and says Shit. Both May and Tony fuss at him for language.

Mod Tisfan Commentary hilarious, and cute!

Name of Piece Slack Water, part five: Tsunami by @tisfan Square Filled K4: Mates Also on A03 Rating Mature Warnings: violence, gore, panic attacks, hurt/comfort, mermaid AU Summary: Tony Stark/Bucky Barnes

Bucky and Tony need to get out of the Hydra facility. Too bad the Red Skull and Zola have been notified about their escape attempt…