#minerva paradizo 1

[af-answers]

[artemis-fowl-angst]

Happy (late) Christmas!!!

Bonus unfinished Minerva and beau

Fanfiction specific fanart and pose reference credits under the cut

Have any of you read road to recovery by Snakequeen-in-Norway?

I really like it, or atleast I like the concepts it sets up. There a lot of aspects I really don’t like, whole chapters I need to skip everytime I read it, in fact. And I don’t agree with the main ship.

But I adore the concepts from the original book it expands on, and the ideas it sets up in terms of friendships, family, connection, and supporting loved ones during hard times.

I personally tend to HC artemis as aroace or ship him with Alex Rider, just because I think the alexmis fan-works are really cute.

This is an idea I’ve had in my head for a while.

We know that artemis was hospitalised on his birthday (sept 1st) and that he continued receiving treatment for 6 months. This means he would’ve been receiving treatment during Christmas. I always liked the (admittedly unrealistic) idea of Artemis’s being allowed to return home briefly for the holidays

Sorry for the lateness of this, I travel for Christmas and I need stable internet to use my drawing tablet

Pose reference credit:

@mellon_soup

@_doodles_i_guess_

@albanenechi

[characterswithgodsnamesbattle]

Round 1 Poll 7

Minerva, Roman goddess of war, wisdom and handcraft, is Athena's equivalent

Demeter is the Greek goddess of agriculture

[checkoutmybookshelf]

We Haven't Technically Come Full Circle Yet, But This Is Where You Know We're Going To

Ok, so even for the most die hard Artemis Fowl fans, this tends to be the book where they say the story and/or the worldbuilding goes off the rails. I am not that Artemis Fowl fan, and it wasn't until the relisten (my hardcovers are in Dad's Basement in Alaska, so lately I've been audiobooking this series) that I really understood why I wasn't as thrown by the seemingly sudden shift as everyone else was. And it's a subtle cue, but it's one that I think actually works. So let's talk Artemis Fowl: The Lost Colony.

*SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS*

The first Artemis Fowl book begins with Artemis and Butler sweating half to death in Ho Chi Minh City trying to buy a lead to a Fairy. It's an opening that tells us we are going to deal with heists, kidnapping, and Artemis being very much the bad guy. It gives us the genre we are going to be working in, and that's basically crime fiction, with Artemis learning not to be a complete dickhead as the character arc. We get that and it basically finishes out with The Opal Deception.

The beginning of The Lost Colony mirrors the beginning of that first book. It starts with Artemis and Butler sweating half to death on a sidewalk in Barcelona waiting for a demon to materialize. We as readers are back to--to borrow a phrase from Robert Jordan--if not THE beginning, A beginning. This is where the book tells you that we are revamping the series, and there are even clues that this will be more of a fairy tale than a crime novel. And that there will be a metric fraggle rock ton of time travel, which holds true for all the rest of the Artemis Fowl novels. Time in general is a key theme in the later books, as Artemis himself tells us when he responds to Butler's query about whether the demon is beaming down from space with "Not space, old friend, [...] Time."

We also get the most hilarious self-actualized Artemis-ism on his own puberty in this chapter:

"It's this blasted puberty, Butler. Every time I see a pretty girl, I waste valuable mind space thinking about her. The girl at that restaurant, for instance. I've glanced in her direction a dozen times in the past few minutes."

And aside from being hilarious, this also cues us into the fact that The Lost Colony is a new beginning for Artemis and the series. Our boy finally hit puberty, and he is not the same cold, focused, calculating little asshole we remember from book 1. Everything about this chapter screams "Hey, remember the first book? This ain't that." It cues the reader that this will be something different, something unexpected. I kind of love this symmetrical asymmetry approach to revamping the series.

We also get the fun of watching two geniuses mastermind against each other while learning how to puberty, and honestly I love that Minerva Paradizo exists. She is a nice little nod to the fact that Artemis is really going to be TORN between the human and fairy worlds. As I believe Philippa Boynes said of the end of Return of the King, if you want to make Frodo going with Sam have weight, you have to give him the other choice. And Eoin Colfer is setting Artemis up to HAVE the choice.

As far as our demons and wrlocks go, mostly what I have to say is that No. 1 is a delightful little cinnamon roll and I love him and I want to scritch his little demon horns.

Now. The other massive thing we need to talk about here is the climax of the book, because Artemis high-key just...time travels. And steals magic. But mostly MOTHERFUCKING TIME TRAVELS. And saves Holly's life with math. But again, TIME TRAVELS. At the end of this book, Artemis is yeeted three years into the future, so he is a 14-year-old body with a 25-year-old brain in a temporal location where he is supposed to be 17. It's peak wibbly wobbly timey wimey ball of stuff. Artemis also has one of Holly's eyes and a little spark of magic. Our boy is fully in fairy tale territory here, and this book was structured really brilliantly to transition the readers from middle grade crime fiction to borderline YA fairy tales. And honestly, if you're willing to let criminal mastermind Artemis go and grow with him (or just consider the series as having two distinct halves, as I do), then I don't actually think the series falls apart in the latter half.

Lots of Artemis Fowl fans might disagree with me on this assessment, and that's fine. You can love on the first 3-4 books and just pretend the second half of the series doesn't exist. But I really love the change, and from a purely structural, writer perspective, Eoin Colfer pulled off an IMPRESSIVE AS HELL shift.

[rosanna-writer]

20 fic writer questions

Thank you to @lady-bluebird-luv and @xxvalkyriesxx for the tag! Starting a new chain since the last one was getting long and tagging @thesistersarcheron, @shallyne, @trappedoutside124, @deaiquiri, and an open tag for anyone else who wants to jump in <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

31!

2. What's your A03 word count?

336,883 but some of it is collab fics, so I'm not sure that's accurate

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Just ACOTAR these days!

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

we said hello and your eyes look like coming home, The Dust of the Stars in Her Eyes, a simple name and everything has changed, to make them love me and make it seem effortless, Out of the Woods

5. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmmmm...maybe we'll never make our parents' mistakes? it's a canon-compliant fic about Rhys and his sister, so there's a bit of a dark cloud over the whole thing

6. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably the rest? I like angst but not without a happy ending

7. Do you get hate on fics?

Not really. People mostly leave me alone because Feysand, gen fics, and the occasional rarepair don't really catch any ship war bullshit

8. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

YES! I do a lot of established relationship smut because I love fluff and writing about my blorbos generally having a good time

9. Do you write cross overs? What's the craziest one you've written?

Not really. I have written retellings, where I "cast" the ACOTAR characters into roles in other stories, but not true crossovers where characters from different media meet.

10. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No, thank god

11. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope, but I'd be flattered!

12. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

with the rest of @feysand-hivemind, the loves of my life

13. What's your all time favorite ship?

Feysand <3

14. What's a WIP you'd like to finish but doubt you ever wilI?

I ended up having a really bad time at work about halfway through writing Karma Is My Boyfriend and needed to stop writing for a few days to take care of IRL stuff. That kind of killed my motivation to finish it, especially with the event week it was for being over.

15. What are your writing strengths?

Plot and pacing!

16. What are your writing weaknesses?

Description, setting, memorable minor characters

17. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

It just feels like a flex (presumably you'd have to translate for monolingual readers anyway) lol

18. First fandom you wrote for?

Artemis Fowl! Mor is the Minerva Paradizo of ACOTAR, and I still love them both so much

19. Favorite fic you've ever written?

I have to answer we said hello and your eyes look like coming home or else that fic will come to life and shank me

20. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try my best! At the very least, I feel obligated to thank someone for taking the time to write me something nice, and if someone's engaging with me, I want to make friends!

[laeliana]

Domovoi Butler had been at Artemis Fowl II's side for fifteen years (eighteen years, for the rest of the world). The very day he had came of age before the law, his principal had ripped to shreds his previous contract and presented him with a brand new one, which – in addition to a substantial pay increase that Artemis had been adamant about – put him directly at his service. Not of the Fowls, but of Artemis himself. And they both knew that he had done it because to him the idea of not rewarding Butler for his work felt repulsive, as the bodyguard would have remained at his side even for just room and board. The time when the relationship between the two of them had been that of employee and employer was long gone. Butler had done things for Artemis that went far beyond his contract, including kidnapping lemurs, kidnapping elves, and dying. And Artemis had done things for Butler that went far beyond his contract, including bringing him back to life. Nowadays, he used to think of Artemis as the son the life he led had never allowed him to have.

And Domovoi Butler had known that Artemis Fowl II and Minerva Paradizo were destined to be part of each other's lives before he saw his principal trying to hide that he had spent his night with her. Before he heard Minerva lean forward from her seat of the Bentley and tell him that he had been right and she had been wrong. Before he caught Artemis asleep with his head on her chest. Before he saw him hug her awkwardly. Before he heard him come up with an absurd plan just to spend the summer with her. Before he saw the look on Artemis’s face when he told him that Minerva had been waiting for him all those three years. Before he saw Minerva spending herself in front of a screen night after night, recalculating the time equation, so sure that she would bring him back. Before he heard her whisper, the moment Artemis vanished into the sky, a desperate “I love you.” Before he had been asked, in the middle of a hostage exchange, if it was normal to feel an absurd feeling of attraction in situations like that, and to have Artemis admit that yes, Minerva was pretty – extremely pretty – and funny. Before he saw his principal almost letting his plan slip out of his mouth, deep as he was in the conversation with her. Perhaps since he had seen the admired look in Artemis' eyes when N°1 had been kidnapped from the Bellini theater in Catania without any of the spectators noticing the demon that had appeared on the stage.

Not that he had anything against it. Quite the opposite. Technically speaking, it shouldn’t have been his business who Artemis dated, but Butler couldn’t have been happier. Artemis and Minerva were perfect for each other. And not just because his principal had finally found someone who spoke his same language, even if it was one completely alien to the rest of the world; not just because Artemis had finally found his match, a girl who could rip apart his arguments word by word. That would have been enough, in Butler’s opinion. But Minerva was changing Artemis. His employer had always been so serious, ever since he was young. Surely a lot of the changes in his behaviour from the cold-hearted twelve-year-old who had planned Holly’s kidnapping had been due to the influence of the People, but Butler had never seen Artemis smile as much as he had in the past three months. And he had never seen him so devastated since the sinking of the Fowl Star.

Have you even met someone who meant the world to you?

Have you even felt like everything was in the right place just being with them, that you two were destined for each other?

Had that person even been ripped from you in the blink of an eye?

Fools' Paradise – Trauma

Next saturday, everything changes

[sinigangrobot]

[anastaciusarklov]

Artemis, Holly, Minerva, Butler, Julius, Foaly and mulch respectively.

[jei-rifni]

https://youtu.be/hjO5nFSzBMI

@a-c-u-l-o-s I dunno if this counts as chaos but its funky either way, thanks.

Its dumb i know but i put in WAY too much effort to make it. Ft my face. (ALSO IM NOT WEARING A SONKOK ITS SUPPOSED TO BE OLD MAN HAIR I DONT HAVE A WIG) also it was like 31 degrees c outside making this so im glad its not so hot (thats why i, able to wear a coat thing ) i still sweat but not as much

Yeah just uh say something nice in the replies and ill send you the carboard thing (if youre willing to give me your address that is) also yes i did fall for real and yes it did actually hurt un-intentionally

[lyssq]

No 1: Aren’t you a little young to be hunting inter-dimensional creatures?

Minerva:

[af-answers]

Mod: Who hasn't told their favorite joke yet?

Minerva: I haven't.

No. 1: Me neither! But you go first, Minnie!

Minerva: .... to be honest, mon ami, my best joke is still the quark one.

Artemis: *chuckles* It gets me every time.

No.1: Oh! Well, then I'll tell mine? Ehem... What kind of dinosaur writes romance novels?

Myles: That's obvious. None. Dinosaurs could not write.

Beckett: T-Rexes might have had the same mating rituals as crocodiles!

Minerva: Nevermind them, what's the answer, Numéro un?

No.1: Right! It's the Brontësaurus.

Beckett: Good one! Now Lazuli, you tell one.

Lazuli: No, I'm not that funny.

Beckett: Come on!

Myles: Don't encourage her to embarrass herself, Beck.

Lazuli: .... Myles' love life.

Artemis: *spits out tea*

What’s the best jokes each one of you had said? (How bad were they Artemis?)

Mod: As for their “best jokes…”

Artemis: How many theoretical physicists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to hold the bulb and one to rotate the universe.

Holly: Someone asked me to lend them $5 yesterday. “Sorry,” I said, “I’m a little short.” (Get it? It works on so many levels!) Now you tell one, Butler!

Butler: I don’t tell jokes.

Mulch: Yeah, me neither, big guy. My humor is flatulence and sarcasm centered.

Foaly: I tell the best jokes, but no one ever gets them. Like this one: “A neutrino walks through a bar.”

Holly: How would a gun walk anywhere?

Artemis and Myles: I get it.

Beckett: Oo! I have one I have one! What do you call a fly with no wings?

All: ……….

Beckett: A walk!

All groan, except Mulch, who laughs maniacally

[pokegeek151]

A sneak peek of altus, alti chapter 3

It was not long before the turmoil of his emotions came to the surface. He was not so naive that he couldn’t recognize his jealousy by now, but that didn’t make him any less confused.

He did not hate Bianca. In fact, if circumstances had been different, he might have even appreciated her easy, almost magnetic charm. He understood why Minerva had been drawn to her.

‘Had been’ wasn’t the case, though, and that was the heart of the issue. Artemis had no memories of meeting Bianca before his death, but he was willing to bet that she and Minerva had behaved much the same way when they were dating as he had seen today. Bianca offered things in a partner that Artemis did not. She was suave and romantic seemingly effortlessly, for one thing. And the touching. Artemis was not blind; Minerva enjoyed affectionate contact, even platonically. Hand holding, physical proximity, gentle, thoughtless touches were all part of Minerva’s ‘vocabulary,’ and Artemis could not keep up. 

Minerva was always considerate of his boundaries, seeking permission and letting him initiate contact. He sifted through his memories from Before, studying how they had touched in the past. Spending time with Minerva brought back new memories for him frequently, but he wasn’t always aware of it. The images and accompanying senses slotted so neatly into his existing memories that it was as if they were never missing.

Even in his oldest memories, Minerva had been forced to hold herself back for his comfort. He wanted to make her happy, but he was not willing to put himself to that level of discomfort. Bianca could, though. She welcomed the easy touches. She sought them out. She complemented Minerva beautifully, and Minerva deserved someone like that. Artemis knew this. Minerva’s happiness made him happy, and he wasn’t afraid to admit that. Furthermore, he had no romantic interest in her.

So why did it hurt to see Minerva and Bianca acting like a couple?

[golden--spark]

Artemis Fowl : The Last Colony

There wasn’t supposed to be a materialization today. If there was, then that would mean Artemis was right, as usual, and a lot more demons were on the way. If that happened, then Artemis Fowl and Holly Short would be up to their necks in the whole saving-the-fairy-race thing, yet again.

Colfer, Eoin. Artemis Fowl: Books 5-8. Penguin Books Ltd.

[raghu2fowl]

In The Lost Colony:

most of one wall was taken up by a mirror

Papa is in the nearby mirror.

A voice boomed through a wall-mounted speaker. 'Not everything. His figures were flawed. But my young genius Minerva figured it out. I'll get you a pony for this, darling. Whatever colour you like.' Minerva waved at the mirror. 'Thank you, Papa. You should know by now that I don't like ponies. Or ballet.' The speaker laughed. 'That's my little girl. What about a trip to Disneyland, Paris? You could dress as a princess.'

He sees and knows what's going on in the interrogation room.

Kong did not respond well to cynicism, especially from a little reptilian creature. In one fluid motion, he flicked the safety off his weapon and fired three shots, blowing apart the headrest of No.l 's seat. The imp's face was showered with sparks and splinters, and the sound of the shots echoed like thunder in the confined space. Minerva was furious. She began screaming long before anyone could hear her.

Any one of those shots could have ricocheted and hit Minerva. But Papa seemingly does not come out of his room. We know this because :

Next door, Papa Paradizo, hearing his daughter's screams, closed his phone and began to turn...

So, just because he was on a call, Papa did not come to Minerva's aid. Well, this is blowing my mind. Does anyone feel the same way, or is it just me? Just curious.

[artemis-fowl-angst]

Sorry for anyone who can’t read cursive

If you’d like I could add a translation to text.

(Mini HC, Myles used to do it exactly like Artemis but then found a glued in entry in one of his journals and changed his own pattern so they wouldn’t match)