#miles has no idea who is spanish teacher really is

[arachnicas]

Miguel decides to try a different approach to dealing with the anomaly that is Miles Morales and moves to the kid's dimension, where he crafts a new identity for himself as Brooklyn Visions Academy's newest Spanish teacher Mr. O'Hara. From there, Miguel would closely monitor Miles and ensure that his canon event remains intact and that he stays out of trouble lest he breaks the multiverse.

However, in typical Miles Morales fashion, Miles charms Miguel and Miguel finds himself questioning everything he's ever known and that maybe this bright-eyed spider is not the doom of the multiverse.

Getting attached had never been part of the plan.

[infinity-or-oblivion]

currently writing a sequel for my teacher!peter au i wrote for interwebs week and this one is all about peter and him trying to figure out how to be a mentor to miles but i’m getting so many new ideas for the kids and idc what to do with them since im trying my damn best not to get sidetracked UGH

for context: peter, ned, mj, flash, and most of their old acadec team from the mcu movies return to midtown tech to teach in their mid-twenties, miles morales starts going there as a freshman along with his childhood best friend ganke, they become friends with sam chung (blindspot from the daredevil comics) and kate bishop and america chavez (from the young avengers comics), and last but not least, i have too many thoughts about their little friend group. go read my fic!!!!!

the school doesn’t let sam take mandarin or japanese, miles or america take spanish, or ganke take korean, but they’re required to take a few semesters of foreign language so:

miles, america and kate take french (kate’s dad wanted her to and miles and america were like sure why not, and french has enough similarities to spanish that it wouldn’t be too difficult for them to pick up), ganke takes spanish because he loves miles and also miles does at least half of his homework for him, and sam also takes spanish but is actually committed to doing the work himself and it’s his fourth language so he’s better at picking up languages than the rest of them so he’s fine (he will never admit that he felt left out by america and miles talking shit in spanish right in front of the rest of them. really it’s unfortunate that ganke and sam have three east asian languages between them but none in common)

the way that their group came together was that miles sat next to kate in their french class and she adopted him and forced him to be friends with her and america, but miles was literally terrified of america before they bonded over being latine. kate regrets introducing them because she knows enough spanish to know when they’re making fun of her but not enough to know what they’re saying. sam ends up sitting with ganke and miles at lunch and it turns out he and miles are the same brand of chaotic, eventually kate and america join them. sign ups for the new acadec team go out and america bullies everyone else into joining, but kate ends up being the one most into it, she's determined to be team captain next year and she's scary intense about it

here's a little snippet that got cut from nothing new under the sun about them:

Miles didn’t want to go to the fancy nerd school at first. He was prepared to enter the nearest public high school and make it through another four years of education, and by then he’d have figured out what he wanted to do with the rest of his life. A simple plan, but there’s nothing wrong with that.

His dad didn’t agree with that sentiment.

“Miles, you are so, so brilliant, and it’s like you don’t even care! You could do amazing things, and this school is going to help you, I promise. I don’t want you to be just another kid in a crowd of thousands, I want more for you,” he told Miles. Miles didn’t really care, he mostly just wanted to stay in Brooklyn. The subway ride all the way into Midtown sounded exhausting.

But Miles ended up at Midtown School of Science and Technology in the fall, and that was that.

His best friend from elementary school had also ended up at Midtown, so at least he wasn’t alone. Ganke had changed a lot in three years, and Miles supposed he had too. But Ganke was still a genius in a way that made Miles feel like he didn’t quite measure up sometimes, so some things never changed. Miles was still constantly doodling and lamenting the fact that the STEM school’s art department was sorely lacking. He pointedly ignored the fact that an underfunded Brooklyn public school would most likely be worse.

But there turned out to be some bright points in the new school. Ganke made friends with a Chinese kid named Sam who quickly became Miles’ friend too, and the three of them messed around in the city every Saturday afternoon. Sam was also a genius, but the more people Miles met, the more he realized that everyone in this school was stupidly smart. The difference was that most of the others actually had some level of motivation. Miles just slogged through his classes and got high test scores. Sam was working on building an actual invisibility suit.

The school required all of the students to take three semesters of foreign language before graduation, and Miles decided to knock them out quickly and just take Spanish, before he realized that Midtown didn’t let students take their native language and his mamá had told the school that he was bilingual on the scholarship application. So Miles had to take a French class, because he figured it would be the next easiest to learn. He ended up being right about that, except for the pronunciation. Vowels in French just didn’t make any sense, not like in Spanish or English.

He sat next to a girl named Kate Bishop who was apparently rich and not happy about it, and her rich parents were making her take French because it was a rich-people thing. Miles knew this because Kate Bishop didn’t stop talking, even when Miles rarely responded. He didn’t mind, not really, but he always felt awkward around her constant energy.

[grimmjowkurosakidrake]

Hermoso

Summary: For the @soulmatebingo “Phrase in native language” 

Keith gets the word “Hermoso" tattooed on his throat. Lance, instead, gets the word “Idiot” tattooed at the back of his neck.

Length: 2347 words

Relationships: Lance (Voltron)/Keith (Voltron), Keith (Voltron) & Shiro (Voltron)

Warnings: Implied depression, implied low self esteem issues

Also, just a quick reminder that you can commission me at @witcheswritings

Keith is thirteen on his fourth day at the Garrison when the word «Hermoso» writes itself deeply into his throat.

He doesn’t know when it happens exactly, one day he’s mark-less and then suddenly he’s seeing the bold, cursive letters, written there, glaring back at him from the mirror in the boys’ bathroom when he’s done washing his hands.

There’s no way he can hide this, it’s the first thing that comes into his mind when he sees it. Small hands tracing the words with slow, hesitant touches. 

It’s almost like his soulmate wants everyone to see these words, to know that he’s... hermoso, whatever that means. 

Keith is not so eager for the world to see these words, however.

He would have to wear high collars or scarfs for the rest of his life if he ever thought about covering this mark. But even when there’s no need for him to try and conceal it, as the school doesn’t have any rules against soulmate tattoos, he still feels the need to hide it from the everyone around him.

There’s someone out there now, his soulmate, who’s noticed him or met him for the first time and those thoughts are now tattooed into his throat.

A deep blush travels from his face to his collarbones at the idea. His soulmate is somewhere around the Garrison, and these foreign words are their first thoughts about him.

“Hermoso.” He tries to say with great difficulty, not really sure in how to roll the r in between the word. It ends up sounding awkward and he wonders if his soulmate will teach him how to say it, someday.

Will his soulmate reach out to him? 

A part of him wants them to, another part it’s almost afraid.

☰☰

Shiro smiles when he sees the mark on his throat, the older boy engulfs him in a warm hug, honestly happy for him. “My Spanish may be a little rusty.” Admits Shiro, kissing the top of Keith’s head even against the boy’s loud protests. “But I’m almost sure it means beautiful.”

The Garrison’s junior officer looks directly into his eyes as he says this.

“That can’t be” Mumbles Keith, rising the high collar of his uniform up at his chin. Beautiful is what you call flowers, butterflies, and pretty girls. It’s how his father used to talk about Keith’s mom.

“I don’t think I’m wrong.” Shiro smiles indulgently, opening the zipper of his jacket until his tattoo is clearly visible. “I think your soulmate thinks you’re beautiful and that’s fine.” He states. “That is exactly how love is supposed to be.”

“Do you have a mark?” Asks Keith, his little hands wrapping around his throat almost on instinct.

“Yes.” Answers Shiro, lifting the sleeves of his jacket, there, on his wrist the words «Cute Smile» sit comfortable like they belong. 

He does have a cute smile, it’s bright and reassuring all the same. The smile of a true leader.

Keith smiles hesitantly. “It’s true.” He admits, Shiro’s smile makes him feel right at home, safe, like there’s nothing wrong in the world even when everything clearly is.

“Then maybe you can be beautiful.” Counters the officer, tapping the top of his nose. “Your soulmate surely thinks so.”

☰☰

Lance is thirteen when he enters the academy; He’s away from his family, he’s miles away from the sea and he’s afraid that he will never make friends with anyone.

But he can feel the space at the tips of his fingers now, his dreams are closer to him now and even if he’s not the space hero protagonist he imagined he’d become as soon as he entered the academy, he knows this is a step closer to his future as pilot.

Four days into the academy, they do weapon training.

It’s a safe begginer’s practice for the most part; they start with blunt weapons as their instructor coldly tells them that there’s no way they can hurt themselves with them, that these weapons are harmless.

Lance can’t help but think that he’s lying, after all, weapons are weapons, specially under the wrong hands. 

But he stays silent.

The people at the Garrison obviously want them to get started on safe battle grounds because more than anything, they will be soldiers.

It should be easy, they give them blunt weapons of choice, ranging from brass knuckles to even one big maze that only someone like Hunk should handle at their age.

“You’ll face robots and drones alike; they wont hurt you but they will charge at you, robots are one pointers, drones...” Explains one of his teachers, pointing at the top of the high ceiling where four drones are flying high about them. “Are two pointers. Try and take them on.” He taunts them.

It’s a lot of fun, for the most part. He’s not good with any of the weapons, not even the Bō -Staff, truth is, no one is. But all of them have fun trying, building camaraderie in their failure.

Because they all fail, until Keith.

The boys destroys three big robots with the Bō -Staff just three minutes after his time starts; using its weight and material to his advantage, he’s not superhuman by any means but he’s smart.

Then, he takes the Sai swords.

Without breaking a sweat, the boy runs towards the destroyed robots to propel himself to the high ceiling of the gymnasium at the Garrison, the swords twirling between his fingers before hitting the first drone, then, he uses the momentum to fall into the second drone and hit it too, it’s ridiculous. 

The difference in between Keith and the rest of them is enormous.

Around him, all of their classmates are glaring at Keith. There’s nothing wrong if they all fail, that means they need more training.

But if one of them passes in the way Keith is passing, then it means the rest of the class is behind. They’re jealous, bitter.

But Lance can’t help but think:

Él es hermoso, la forma en que se mueve, ágil y mortal. Como una pantera acechando a su presa.

It’s the first time he thinks of the boy. But it surely won’t be the last.

Keith is larger than life, a beautiful monster, oblivious to the world around him; even Lance. 

With time, everything he does, is with Keith on his thoughts. Maybe if he gets stronger, he will be at Keith’s level, maybe they will become partners, fighting and flying shoulder to shoulder.

Reaching the stars side by side.

Keith never notices him, or so he thinks, but a week into the Garrison, Lace gets his mark. The word «Idiot» tattooed into the back of his neck, forever.

But he doesn’t notice it until Hunk points it out when they’re changing clothes after gym hours.

“Lance!” He screams exited. “You got your mark!” Probably not even thinking about what  those words say.

Hunk has always been a romantic, in love with love, never thinking about how cruel it can be.

“Really?” Asks Lance just as exited. “What does it say?”

“Oh…” Whispers Hunk, his voice audibly less chipper.

“What?” Insists Lance. “C’mon, Hunk. Don’t put me on edge, big boy.”

“Idiot.” He finally says. “It says idiot.”

“Oh…” Mimics Lance, his voice disappointed but not actually surprised.

A few days later, just at the start of summer, he sees Keith’s mark for the first time.

☰☰

When he tells his family they try to lighten the mood. “Oh, honey.” Laughs his mom through the screen when he video-chats them about it. “Pobrecita tiene que haberte visto hacer alguna tontería.”

Lance chuckles “Pobrecito, mamá.” He corrects her, “my soulmate is a boy, you know.”

At his words, his mom brightens. “Oh!” She exclaims, “You know who he is!”

“Yes.” Responds Lance with a grimace marring his face. “He’s beautiful.”

His mother is happy for him; in fact, his whole family is. But Lance can’t help but feel resentful. This is what Keith thinks of him, his first impression of Lance and he thinks he’s an idiot.

They’ve never exchanged words, never even fought. How stupid can he be if that’s the first thought a complete estranger has of him?

He doesn’t tell Keith that they’re soulmates, he won’t force the bright, beautiful future prodigy of the Garrison to stuck with a stupid cargo pilot.

Then Keith drops out of the Garrison and he doesn’t have to pretend. Without Keith there, Lance doesn’t have to pretend that he’s not in love.

☰☰

When they meet again he notices that Keith no longer hides his mark, now, instead of the high collars and tight shirts at his neck, he wears a black shirt with a deep v neck, showing off both his throat and his collarbones.

“It means beautiful.” He supplies one day, boldly tracing the words on his soulmate’s throat. They’re sitting on Lance’s bed in his room at the castle.

 Besides Shiro, Keith has only been comfortable with Lance touching him, after so many physical fights and training together maybe he no longer minds having the cuban boy near him.

Without thinking, Lace’s hand reaches out to the back of his own neck. “I thought you were beautiful, back then.” He confesses. “Beautiful and deadly, like a panther.” Clarifies the brunette, chuckling “I guess I wasn’t wrong, mister red lion.”

“What does your mark says?” Asks the red paladin, hesitant. He knows that Lance has a mark, he probably already knows the obvious, rhat Lace and him are soulmates.

“You don’t remember?” He asks, his voice small, insecure.

Keith puts his legs over Lance’s own, resting his head on his shoulder. “My dad died a year before I entered the Garrison.” He articulates as if it explained anything. “Two months later I met Shiro and he encouraged me to apply.” His is voice small, barely a whisper. “He gave me a reason to keep on going. Suddenly I had a meaning, I was good at flying and at fighting, a natural soldier, but...” He pauses. “I wasn’t happy.”

“Keith…” Tries Lance, not really knowing what to say. 

Keith is not really explaining anything but his words are having an impact on Lance anyway. No matter the words tattooed on their skin, even if they weren’t soulmates, Lance knows that he loves the other boy and he would never want him to be unhappy.

Keith interrupts him before he can even voice his thoughts. “I don’t remember when, but you got yourself caught in a rope one day. You were on the ground, just a mess of limbs and rope and I laughed.” He smiles. “I laughed so hard that I cried a little.”

“Glad to be of service.” Mutters Lance, tangling long fingers on Keith’s unruly hair.

“I thought you were an idiot, such an idiot.” Keith whispers, moving into his lap, trying to get as close to Lance as possible. “And I laughed for the first since my father died.” He pauses for a moment, looking up to Lance, trying to gauge his reaction to his words. Lance smiles down at his soulmate. “It was the first thing I thought about you but it wasn’t the last.” He rushes. “I swear.”

“Yeah?” Asks Lance with a goofy grin painted on his face as he carefully removes a rebellious lock of dark hair from Keith’s face.

“You were always around people, always happy.” Smiles Keith. “I wish your mark was different.” He confesses. “You’re funny, you’re brave, you’re tenacious.” Keith pauses for a moment, just to take Lance’s hand with his own. “You make me happy.”

“I’m suddenly fine with my mark if this s what you make of it.” Jokes Lance, even when he knows that he’s lying.

The reality it’s that he’s never going to forget the disappointment and the resentment. He has spent at least four years of his time at the Garrison thinking that his soulmate thought him nothing but an idiot and for some time, he tried to convince himself that Keith was right.

“I hope that’s not true.” Argues Keith. “I’m sorry about your mark.” He apologies. “Especially when my mark is…” He chokes, holding his throat like a lifeline. “Especially when mine is the best thing that could even happen to me.”

“It’s not fine.” Lance confesses. “I really wish it was fine, that I could feel proud of my mark like you do.”

“I’m sorry.” Apologies Keith once again, his face contorting in anguish.

“But it doesn’t mean that what I felt about you has changed. It doesn’t mean that you’re not my soulmate or that I wish you weren’t my soulmate.” He continues, holding onto Keith’s hips and drawing the other boy closer to him.

In this position they’re almost the same height, chest to chest with Keith being a head taller than him for the first time ever. Lance doesn’t mind. No with Keith’s legs straddling him like this.

“I want to make it up to you.” Whispers the red paladin over his lips like a promise.

“You don’t have to.” Answers Lance, his mouth barely touching Keith’s.

Keith doesn’t answer, instead, he closes the gap in between, his lips closing around Lance’s own lower lip with a conteted sigh.

Both boys moan together as they kiss, they’ve been waiting for this moment, building up the tension and the attraction until neither of them could take it anymore.

With a sigh, Keith wraps his arms around Lance’s neck, his fingertips caressing the words hidden at the back of his neck. “You really make me happy.” He murmurs, kissing his soulmate again, the tip of his tongue seeking entrance shyly.

Lance smirks and opens his mouth, his own tongue meeting Keith’s before closing his lips over Keith’s lips. His hands sneaking under the shorter boy’s shirt, feeling the warm skin there.

“You make me happy, too, beautiful.” He whispers, settling a warm, kiss under his soulmate’s jawbone. “Realmente me haces feliz, hermoso.”

Keith sighs, his whole body falling into Lance’s arms, content there.

Safe.

[jupitermelichios]

DC: The High-School AU: The Series: The Staff (the musical)

So I finally cast the school staff and teachers for my DC High School AU, which I thought some of you would have some fun with! I took the subject list from a fairly fancy looking private school, because only schools you have to pay for have their subject lists online, so I’m probably offering way more classes than your average state school, but hey, it’s my AU and I wanted to cram in as many supervillains, obscure heroes, and bad jokes as possible.

Admin & Staff

Principle - Amanda Waller

Deputy Principle & Treasurer - Noah Kuttler (the Calculator)

Nurse - Myra Mason (she was Dr Midnite’s nurse and love interest in the 40s & 50s, then got fridged, but I’m unfridging her and giving her a job with much better survival prospects)

Councillor - Ethel Peabody (she’s a psychiatrist from the Gotham TV show, and also in my headcanon, Amanda Waller’s sister)

Librarian - Stanislaus Johns (The Librarian. I considered bookworm for this job but he’s literally called the Librarian, what was I supposed to do, not use him?)

Admin Staff - Laura Conway (Superman supporting cast and occaisional vampire), Mabel Martin (Riddler’s secretary), Theresa Collins (Goldstar, also Booster Gold’s secretary)

Business

Loren Jupiter (aka Mr Jupiter the richest and therefore most thrustworthy man in the world) - Business 101, Business Law, Entrepreneurship

Wesley Dodds (Sandman) - Business Communications

Annabeth Chamberlain (Brimstone) - Marketing, Hospitality & Tourism (she doesn’t work in tourism, but I figure anyone who can waitress while also having the power to set people on fire and damn them to hell and keeps her job probably knows a whole lot about customer service)

Family & Consumer Science

Miss Tribb (Lobo’s childhood teacher who inexplicably survived the extinction of their species) - Childhood Developement, Early Childhood Education

Neil Richards (The Mad Mod) - Texiles/Sewing, Fashion

Tenzil Kem (Matter-Eater Lad) - Food & Nutrition

Finance

Noah Kuttler (The Calculator) - Personal Finance

Foreign Languages

Matron Bertinelli (Nu52 Huntress, who I’m declaring a sepperate character and the aunt of pre-52 Huntress because they’re radically different characters and I like both of them) - ASL, Italian

Chang Jie-Ru (Nu52 Yo-Yo) - Chinese, AP Chinese

Yolanda Montez (Wildcat II) - Spanish, AP Spanish

Barbara Minerva (Cheetah) - Latin

Health Sciences

Myra Mason - Emergency Medical Responder training

Charles McNider (Dr Midnite) - Anatomy & Physiology, Health Class

IT

Brian Durlin (Savant) - Computer Programming, Web Dev

Jennifer Lyn-Hayden (Jade) - Digital Art 101

Arnold Wesker (Ventriloquist) - 3D Animation, 3D Graphics (I don’t know why but the idea of Wesker as an animator just tickled me. Obviously his real passion is stop-motion, but he learnt 3D because there were more jobs)

English (the fancy private school called this ‘language arts’ which is so prentious it makes me feel slightly nauseous)

Wesley Dodds (Sandman) - English Language, AP English Language

Rac Shade (Shade the Changing Man) - English Literature, AP English Literature

Chloe Sullivan (the worst character in the Smallville TV show, a hotly contested position) - English Language, Communications 101, supervises the School Paper and the Yearbook

Shelly Gaynore (The Whip III) - Englist Literature, Creative Writing

Basil Karlo (Clayface) - Intro to Shakespeare

Nick Scratch (officially his supervillain name is just Scratch, but I refuse to consider that a code-name, looking at you Drake) - Communications 102: Public Speaking

Mathematics (which has a 100% villain make-up, which seems accurate from what I remember of high-school maths)

Noah Kuttler (The Calculator, because I think I’m funny) - Pre-Calc, Calculus, AP Calculus

Harlan Graves (The Underbroker) - Stats, Algebra 1, Algebra 2

Angelo Bend (Angle Man, becuase I know I’m funny) - Geometry, Trigonometry

PE (I realise this is probably too many PE teachers but there are a lot more caonical althetes than just about any other job in the DCU except maybe scientist)

Lawrence Crock (Sportsmaster, you knew this was coming) - Gym, Weight Training, coaches Baseball, Basketball, Tennis & Hockey

Lisa Snart (Golden Glider) - joint-coaches Cheerleading, coaches the Drill Team, Wrestling

Randy Hanrahan (Stallion) - PE, joint-coaches Cheerleading & Cross-Country, coaches Football

William Everett (Amazing Man) - PE, joint-coaches Cross-Country, coaches Track & Field

Matron Bertinelli (Huntress, sort of) - coaches Soccer & gymnastics

Performing Arts

Lisa Snart (Golden Glider) - Dance

Hartley Rathaway (Pied Piper) - Music 101, Music Theory, Composition, teaches Guitar & Percussion

Isaac Bowin (The Fiddler) - Music 101, AP Music Theory, leads Jazz Band, Orchestra, Marching Band

Siobhan Smyth (Silver Banshee) - part-time, leads the Choir and teaches singing

Basil Karlo (Clayface) - Theatre, Theatre 101

Simon Trent (Grey Ghost) - Theatre, Theatre 101, Film Studies

Ted Kord (Blue Beetle) - Theatre Tech

Mary Louise Dahl (Baby-Doll, from B:TAS) - Film Studies, Video Production

Betty Bates (Lady-at-Law, who is technically owned by DC now due to corporate buy-outs) - Debate

Science (do you have any idea how hard it is to pin down areas of specialisation for comic book scientists? TNT is on this list entirely because he’s the only actual honest-to-god professional chemist I could find)

Kirk Langstrom (ManBat) - Biology, AP Biology

Pamela Isley (Poison Ivy) - Biology, Environmental Science

Thomas “Tex” Thomas (TNT) - Chemistry

Achilles Milo (Professor Milo, again not really much of a code name) - Chemistry, AP Chemistry

Will Magnus (I refuse to even dignify it as a code-name) - Physics, Earth Sciences

Ray Palmer (The Atom) - Physics, AP Physics

Adam Strange (DC is just doing this to fuck with me, personally) - Astronomy

Social Studies & Humanities

Barbara Minerva (Cheetah) - World History

Maxie Zeus (ffs) - World History, AP World History (fun fact, Maxie was canonically just a normal history teacher before he got lightning powers, became convinced he was Zeus incarnate, and set out to become a criminal, making him my favourite DC mobster by a country mile)

Terry Long (aka one of the only characters to really deserve to get fridged) - US History, AP European History

Eobard Thawne (every code-name he has is stupid, but lets just go with Reverse-Flash as the least awful option) - US History, AP US History

Nick Scratch - US Government, AP US Government, AP Comparative Politics

Rex Tyler (Hourman) - AP Art History

Magdalene Kyle-Burton (Sister Zero, she’s a sometimes-nun and a sometimes-sister to Catwoman) - Comparative Religion

Michael Carter (Booster Gold) - Economics, AP Microeconomics, AP Macroeconomics

Jonathan Crane (Scarecrow) - Psychology (there is exactly one heroic psychiatrist in all of comics, and I’d already used Dr Fate elsewhere. Scarecrow seemed like the least bad option of the remaining pool for being around children, and he does at least have teaching experience)

Adam Strange - Sociology

Betty Bates (Lady-at-Law) - Law

Richard Occult/Rose Psychic (it’s complicated, lets just say Dr Occult and leave it at that) - part-time, Criminal Justice

Technology & Engineering

Ted Kord (Blue Beetle) - Electronics, CAD, Woodworking

John Henry Irons (Steel) - Engineering, Metalworking

Will Magnus - Robotics

Visual Arts

Linda Lee/Danvers (she’s Supergirl, but I’m making her a different character from Kara Danvers/Kent because the DCU is really short on artists and I needed someone to teach the damn class, although the only thing that really makes her distinct from other supergirls is that she fucked a horse that one time and IDK how that will translate into a personality...) - Ceramics, AP Studio Art: 3D Design, Art 101

Rex Tyler (Hourman) - Graphic Design, Drawing, AP Studio Art: Drawing

Jack Knight (Starman) - Painting, AP Studio Art: 2D Design, Art 101

Jennifer Lyn-Hayden (Jade) - Photography

So there you go - I’ll be honest I still don’t really understand how high-schools in the USA work, and I have no idea what Design studio art even is so I kind of assigned those ones at random, but now it’s done and cannot be changed.

As always this universe is open to prompts so if you want a chapter focussing on any of these characters just drop me an ask or a comment and I’ll see what I can do. Making Dr Occult & Rose Psychic a single gender-fluid person is already on my list to do, since that’s who I thought they were for a longest time when I started reading comics and I’m still kind of annoyed that isn’t canonically what’s going on.

[siliquasquama]

I say Black Lives Matter because there’s a lot of people whose money rides on denying that idea

In comparing the history of the Spanish and Portuguese colonies in North America versus the English, I notice a marked difference in rates of racial intermarriage. The Spanish colonies had a lot of it whereas the English ones didn't.

I've always attributed this effect to a greater desire for Blood Purity among English settlers, but the Spanish nobles were the ones who pushed the concept first, and the behavior of Criollos within the colonies does not indicate any loss of race-based thinking among them. So on the part of the Spanish colonists, I usually attribute the rates of intermarriage to the fact that the Encomienda system contained a legal loophole that created an intermarriage custom early enough to render any prohibition futile.

But what about the English, then? They didn't seem to go in for that quite as much, what with the general attitude towards stealing Indian land on an individual basis rather than making Indians into serfs for the Crown. They didn't seem to go in for intermarriage with black slaves and freedmen, either.

And yet -- I have heard tell that the Black Codes of the 1690s were set up specifically to prevent any unity between black and white folk, and people don't make laws prohibiting something unless there is something happening that they do not want to happen. And there was something to prohibit. Bacon's Rebellion had seen an uprising that combined runaway servants and slaves with middle-class revolutionaries, and though they were not the whole population they demonstrated the danger of letting commoners unite; the Virginia Slave Codes of 1705 were a specific attempt to socially segregate white and black people, such that the two peoples would grow apart and estranged. If unity was impossible nobody would ever have had to break it.

Which raises the question of what purpose the anti-black codes of the early 1800s had. In many places such as Connecticut, they were enacted right on the heels of abolishing slavery. Was it a top-down effort to keep the contemporary social and economic structure in place, or an outgrowth of deep-seated prejudice among the general population? Or both? Some states prohibited the settlement of black people altogether, which sounds more like plain prejudice, or, in the case of Oregon, an effort to make sure that white folks got all the good land there was to get first -- is that prejudice or greed? Maybe in that case it's impossible to separate the two.

A proper examination of that particular question would require a thorough look at the arguments made in favor of enacting those laws, if such records remain, or, failing that, a thorough look at the public rhetoric in a given area and year where such codes were enacted. In a country that prides itself on legislators enacting the Will of the People, it would be hard to argue that any law creating great social change did not reflect the will of those people.

The widespread existence of anti-miscegenation laws, the enactment of the One Drop Rule forcing mixed-race people into the lower classes, and the legal enforcement of physical segregation indicates this sort of specific prejudice among the population -- and yet these laws also indicate the existence of what they were prohibiting. Which makes them look like they are propping up something which would otherwise collapse.

Federal policy from the first half of the 20th century indicates that this system was already showing cracks. WASPs in the federal government forced the re-segregation of working-class city districts when granting them federal funding for housing. Apparently there was a quiet de-segregation happening all along, simply as a matter of working-class people living close to their work places.

And even the post-1865 efforts among white midwesterners to drive black people out of their towns indicates the presence of such black people to begin with, and the fear that having them around would slowly change a specific way of life unless something was done about it --

As if even widespread prejudice was not simply a matter of individualized fear and hatred, but a way of propping up something specific whose existence was otherwise threatened. The sudden prohibition of black people from being jockies was presented in my high-school history book as specific reaction against the possibility that it would provide black people a way out of their economic oppression. The part of "The Souls of Black Folk" where the white landowner warns the aspiring black teacher about teaching black folks has the landowner frame the matter a defense of the current system. The white mob in Tulsa that burned Black Wall Street was targeting something they saw as a threat to their own ambitions. The white folks in Chicago who went nuts to see a black man move into their neighborhood had been led for decades to believe such a thing would lower their property values, and the continuing efforts to slyly enforce segregation within suburbs are conducted on the same basis.

For a most contemporary example, see 2008 and the reactions of white republican voters and legislators; so many of them are from states where the economic system still depends upon keeping people poor, and a Black Democrat looked like he would be a Progressive and threaten all that, where a Black Republican would not.

The fact that these people are perfectly happy to let a black man into the party so long as he obeys the whims of the party resembles the old slaveholders who professed to love every one of their slaves as long as they were faithful, which is to say quiet and obedient. Likewise, southern white folks have long held that they are much friendlier and closer to southern black folks than white people are up North. To which I say, sure enough and that's not the problem. Northern whites got mad when black folks got too close; Southern whites got mad when black folks got too big; either way it's about reacting in defense of the current system. Y'all can be as cheerful as you want but when someone threatens the system and your response is murder, I don't give a damn how nice you were before because all that friendliness looks like it really is an inch deep.

As I often say, racism is an economic system that does not arise from prejudice, any more than an engine is built out of lubricant. Hatred and prejudice grease the wheels, but the point is to make lots of money for someone by keeping specific people as a low-paid underclass to minimize labor costs. The reactionary prejudice appears when that kind of economy is threatened by the possibility that these people can escape the underclass, because such an underclass only works to the purposes of high profits when people are held there.

So, when Chris Rock says that "white people were crazy", he is correct to a certain extent, but he fails to make it clear when and where that insanity arose -- it was always the insanity of a reaction, the desperate defense of one's Way Of Life, which is to say one's Money, because this is all built in support of mercantile and industrial Capitalism. it is not some rootless, generalized thing that exists in all societies through the ages. Fear of The Other is enough to organize reactionary movements but the necessity of those reactionary movements indicates that such fear doesn't hold the system together on its own.

Although, if the habits of American racism are seen in most places where colonies are established among a subjugated and resentful native population, one can argue that it is all a matter of supporting Imperialism rather than capitalism specifically. This would be easier to test if one could find such a settler colony whose money depended on something besides Capitalism, and while Rome might be the best source of examples, their empire depended on assimilating conquered peoples without imposing strict segregation. Even the Hebrews, those inveterate foes of Rome, were cast OUT of Judea rather than being confined within it.

Then again, empires of ancient times were not averse to slaughtering peoples who dared resist; one might say that the rise of Mercantile Capitalism created an imperialism where the imperial center wanted to subjugate people without threatening their existence as a source of revenue, and so built various forms of Apartheid as a compromise, using the concept of Blood Purity to steer individuals of the dominant class away from threatening the system. In that sense, the difference between English, French, and Spanish patterns of imperial subjugation occurred because the Spanish and French colonists were able to make big money out of the natives and the English colonists could not. The geography of this middle part of North America was inhospitable to the kind of fur-trading or plantation serfdom that the rest of the continent took advantage of, until the settlers decided to import slaves who could be replaced faster than they died. By this means the native peoples of middle North America were displaced instead of assimilated because it made more economic sense. But it was still a system that didn't really work for the geography without specific and continuing legal efforts to keep it going, which needed to foster a specific prejudice among the commoners so they would blame their system's injustice on the wrong people.

Which is to say, what we have isn't natural. It is built, and it is not even built very well for its environment. All the reactionary movements you see in its support are people trying to patch the machine. Without those patches the damn thing would have broken down three hundred miles ago.

And such reactions are collective, not singular. What distinguishes a lynching from a murder is the fact that the whole town comes out to register their approval. A lynching is a political act that it meant to unify one group of people at the same time it terrifies another into submission. It depends upon community approval, whether in active support or quiet acceptance. Those who would maintain racism have always wielded prejudice as a tool for gathering public support behind reactionary movements. For example, Jesse Helms secured his political career by running a campaign of that stoked anti-black prejudice against his progressive opponent, not to insult the opponent personally but to link his ideas to the idea of Race Mixing, oh horrors, protect your children, your neighborhoods, your property values.

In that light — if you would have a world where racism finally fell apart, you will have to impede the reactionary movements that maintain it. So keep watch for how reaction to economic justice is being organized around you. What rumors are circulating about the progressive efforts of the day? What distortions are you seeing? Most importantly, how are you being convinced to quietly approve of efforts against justice? In our own day we see news reports bringing up the criminal record of someone killed by the police, or focusing on the small gestures of niceness police forces make while omitting the tear gas that follows, or spreading wild rumors about the Capital Hill Autonomous Zone or about Antifascist groups, peddling the lie that police work is comparatively dangerous or that the U.S. is still full of violent crime that you could run into and the police are there to protect you — anything and everything to foster your apathy and your approval for upholding the Status Quo.

Meanwhile, the online rhetoric surrounding the current protest efforts includes posts that assume black and white people will be there together, borne out by the racial makeup of the crowds. It is almost as if we are in another period where sectarian prejudice among the underclass is decaying to the point it threatens the system.

Keep a sharp eye out for anyone trying to revive prejudicial separatism between peoples of the underclass. Keep an eye out for anyone trying to push sharp distinctions between black and white people. Those distinctions wouldn't be there if people hadn't put effort into maintaining them over the centuries. It was always about keeping up the strategy of Divide and Rule so the system wouldn't fall apart. Make sure it falls apart now.

[onthevirgeofdestruction]

Dreaming While I Wake

Sanders Sides Foster Care AU - Roman-centric Angst & Hurt/Comfort & Abuse Recovery

Roman tries to be upbeat and hopeful despite all the shit that’s happened to him. And a lot of shit has. Luckily, his new foster home is with two literal rays of sunshine (and a sarcastic asshole). 

Chapter 10

chapter 1 for new readers - ffn mirror

tags: @bunny222

  Virgil took very long strides on the way to campus this morning. Roman was lucky he was quick, because Virgil has long-ass legs. It was a few blocks away, not really a terrible walk. Roman hated being up this early, though. He and Virgil didn’t even sign to each other. Roman was pretty sure Virgil would also give anything right now to go back to bed, just based on his glower and the way he kept seeming to lose focus.   Roman wasn’t doing any better. Roman kept yawning and accidentally tripping on uneven parts of the sidewalk. Virgil didn’t even make fun of him. Roman hadn’t known him that long, but Virgil never missed an opportunity to until now. Mondays, maybe. Or just mornings. Roman wasn’t sure it mattered. Maybe Virgil was mad at having to show Roman the way to campus early. He didn’t seem to care when Thomas asked him to, though. But Roman didn’t have the best read on him. The parts of the night he managed to sleep he had his patented nightmares again, so it just a step above complete insomnia.   When they got to campus, Virgil quickly veered off down a hall without waving bye as Roman headed to the front office. The exhausted-looking administrative personal looked up when he stepped in.   “Um, Roman Reinhart?” Roman said warily.   “On the right, first door on the left. Councilor's office,” She said, pointing behind her to the hall on the right, not looking away from her computer screen. Roman nodded and shuffled quickly down the hall, peeking through the cracked open door.   “Oh, Mr. Reinhart?” The man at the desk asked. Roman nodded and stepped in. “Alright, we’ve just put you in the core classes that we had spots left in based on the transcript from your last school. You just have to pick your electives. You can keep taking art if you like, there’s room in the class. This school doesn’t have Latin, so you can’t keep taking that one. There’s no room in Spanish II this semester year, but you can take it next year. You only need two language credits to graduate. Colleges like a balanced transcript, so trying something new wouldn’t be a bad idea. Pick two,” The councilor handed Roman a piece of paper with the remaining available electives. Roman just stared at them, dumbfounded. He didn’t know what he was interested in and he wasn’t even sure he’d be here long. Roman looked up at the counselor, looking at him expectantly and somewhat annoyed.   “Um, yeah, art, and uh, choir?” Roman said, picking the first thing that came to mind before the councilor got mad at him. The councilor took back the sheet and typed at his computer in silence while Roman sat there awkwardly. He probably thought of choir because of what Patton said. Maybe if Roman signed up for the stuff Patton wanted him to, he could… that was probably too much to hope. It was just a gut decision. But he could give it a shot. At least he could know if he liked choir or not before they kicked him out. It’s not like he was doing stellar in Latin. “Uh, I’d like to do cross-country, maybe? I’m sure I missed tryouts. How would I join?” Roman asked tentatively.   “Ask the PE teacher after class. You’ve got PE just before lunch, so you should have plenty of time to get it sorted out,” He said, continuing to work on his computer. After a few more uncomfortable moments, the ancient printer finally spewed out a class schedule.   “Here you go, kid. Maps and school calendar are on the wall in the front office. You’ve got about a couple minutes until the first warning bell goes off, so try to familiarize yourself with the map. You’ve got 8 minutes between classes to get where you need to go. Here’s your locker assignment. There’s no room in the sophomore locker hall so you’re with the junior lockers on the second floor,” He handed Roman a little slip of paper with a combination on it and the locker number.   “The teachers should already know to expect you, except for in art and choir. If you just ask them your seating assignment before the bell goes off and you should be golden,” Roman nodded and stepped back out of the office to grab the map off the wall and start trying to navigate this monster of a school. —   Roman sighed and picked at his school lunch as he sat alone at the edge of the cafeteria. He’d met some nice people in his morning English class, but they didn’t share his lunch period. Roman wouldn’t mind eating alone so much if it didn’t look like he was literally the only person doing it. He’d done this a million times before, so he knew he’d eventually find a friend group to tolerate him. But the first few weeks always sucked. And the food sucks. This breadtangle of pizza was soggy and gross, and what even was on these green beans? Why were they slimy? The texture of everything was pretty disgusting. He’ll need to ask Virgil what’s edible here before lunch tomorrow.   The PE teacher told Roman to come after school to practice to try out, and Roman kind of looked forward to that. They didn’t meet every day and the PE teacher said anyone who could run under an eight-minute mile could join. Roman had never timed himself before, but he was pretty certain he could do that. It would be nice to do something he was okay at for a change instead of always fucking up. He was still nervous about choir later this afternoon, but he knew he could run. You don’t have to try out for choir or anything, but he still didn’t want to find out he was a bad singer. It was probably a poor decision. Stupid impulsiveness.   Roman’s stomach turned as he forced down the food. It was vile, completely, and the texture was a nightmare that made his skin crawl, but he couldn’t throw it out and waste food. He still had some free time before the next bell, so he went to go sit outside. He needed some fresh air for the nausea from lunch. The cafeteria was really loud, and it was wearing on him, too. Roman sat back under a tree in some weird wood chip garden and took a deep breath of the autumn air. It was at least a good thing it wasn’t too far into the semester so he could catch up easier. But he will have an unbearable amount of homework this week. Roman leaned back and closed his eyes, trying to get a brief rest before lunch was over. —   Roman stretched out nervously. He was in kind of tight jeans and not exactly prepared for this, but he was just supposed to run with the others, keep in his lane, and clear 8 minutes, and then the PE teacher would make her decision. The regular-track kids were also here, and they were staggering start times to share the space. Roman watched football practice on the field while the track kids started off. He took a deep breath and joined the cross-country kids as the starting lines, waiting for the teacher’s whistle to take off.   Roman started running at the whistle, and some kids took off much faster than him, but Roman didn’t want to tear these pants. They were possibly just trying to show off, because they slowed down as the group turned the corner, and Roman pulled ahead with a smirk. He got a glower from one of the ones he passed, but the other held up his thumbs and looked pretty excited. As he turned the final corner, Roman ran faster to try to make sure he stayed under 8 minutes. Another two kids beat him to the finish line, but the exact middle of the pack was a good sign.   “Roman! 5:48!” The PE teacher called, walking up to him while he caught his breath at the edge of the track.   “What, really?” Roman smiled. He probably could keep going, too.   “You’re welcome to join if you’d like,” She said, sounding excited. “That’s an impressive time for a newbie,”   “I, yeah, yes,” Roman stammered.   “Well, go ahead and queue up with the same pack to run it again slower, and come to my office after practice so we can get the paperwork. You need parents’ permission to join so I’ll need you to bring back a signed form. You can drop it off during PE tomorrow or the next meet on Wednesday,” She said and Roman nodded excitedly and walked over with the pack.   “Hey, congratulations, dude!” One of them smiled. “I’m Toby,” He drank some water. Roman didn’t have the forethought to bring water out and felt like a thirsty idiot.   “Roman,” He smiled brightly.   “You’ve got pretty good form, did you run at another school?” Another boy asked. “Seth’s the name,”   “No, just a, uh, hobbyist,” Roman said as dismissively as he could manage.   “I can tell from the fact you’re wearing jeans,” Another boy scoffed.   “I didn’t expect to be able to try out as soon as I asked,” Roman rolled his eyes. “Maybe you should worry how fast I’d go with practice,” Roman smirked. Seth and Toby laughed.   “Yeah, chill out, Nolan. Roman’s new,” Toby said, patting him on the back.   “Ugh, whatever,” Nolan rolled his eyes and started stretching out again.   “That’s Augustine, call her Aggie or she’ll tackle you. The last one is Julie. She thinks she’s better than all of us so don’t bother talking to her,” Seth, Toby, and Aggie laughed and Julie scoffed.   “I am better than all of you,” Julie flipped him off quickly and went back to stretching.   “So why’d you pick cross-country over track?” Seth asked.   “Tracks get boring. I’m an urban runner if anything,” Roman shrugged.   “Same. We practice on a track pretty often and I get sick of it quick. Other than running around campus, they bus us out to a hiking trail or send us back to the obstacle course sometimes, unlike track, though,” Seth shrugged.   “An obstacle course?” Roman’s face lit up.   “Yeah, dude, it’s pretty cool. It’s splinter city, but it’s a pretty big course. Some other schools in the district even come out here to use it,” Seth smiled.   “We have a friendly competition about obstacle course times if you’re interested,” Nolan smirked mischievously.   “He’s literally never run it before, it’s not fair to him,” Toby rolled his eyes.   “No, I’m interested,” Roman said, eying Nolan suspiciously.   “It’s nothing major. Loser accepts any dare the winner chooses,” Nolan said with a small shrug.   “Shit, dude, that’s fine by me,” Roman laughed. He’d probably do any dare he was given anyway, he had shit impulse control and was very aware of that fact.   “Cool,” Toby laughed, and they walked to the track to wait for their start again. —   Roman’s mouth was dry as hell by the time he got back to Thomas and Patton’s house. He chugged some very metallic water from the fountain after practice, but he had that whole paperwork thing, and then jogging back defeated him. Lita barked excitedly as Roman came in. Roman bent down to scratch her head and made a bee-line to the kitchen to chug some water.   “Roman? Is that you?” Thomas called.   “Mm-hmm,” Roman grunted between gulps of water.   “I was surprised not to see you come in with Virgil,” Thomas said, walking into the kitchen.   “Patton told me I should try out for cross-country or something,” Roman said, pouring another cup of water.   “Oh, did you?” Thomas asked curiously.   “Yeah,” Roman breathed. “I don’t want to bother you or anything but there’s stupid stuff to sign so I can join,” Roman kicked his foot lightly into the tile.   “Oh, you passed the tryouts?” Thomas beamed. “Congratulations! I’m happy to sign a permission slip. Oh, we should probably get you some running gear. Did you really run in those jeans? I’m surprised they didn’t rip,” Thomas asked, sounding concerned.   “It was kind of a last-minute decision,” Roman huffed. “I don’t need anything,” Roman rubbed his arm awkwardly.   “Roman, half your clothes barely fit you from what I’ve seen,” Thomas said critically.   “I had a growth spurt at 14 and I probably will again soon,” Roman said dismissively, backing up a bit.   “That doesn’t mean we have to wait until your clothes don’t fit at all,” Thomas frowned. “Virgil, back me up here,” He asked Virgil as he walked past them to the fridge.   ‘About what?’ Virgil signed. ‘That Roman is an idiot?’ Roman rolled his eyes.   “I don’t think he was listening,” Roman took another drink of water.   “That Roman doesn’t need to wear clothes until he explodes out of them like the hulk,” Thomas said emphatically.   ‘That’d be cool to see, can you do that?’ Virgil signed, and Roman laughed.   “He’s not backing me up, is he?” Thomas huffed. Virgil saluted them and left the kitchen with a drink and chewing on something from the fridge.   “I think he’s on his own team,” Roman chuckled. “You just got me some clothes, it’s fine,”   “We got you two outfits worth, Roman, and if I knew most of your shirts were nearly see-through, I would have pushed for more,” Thomas frowned.   “I- I don’t…” Roman trailed off.   “You don’t what?” Thomas asked, leaning against the counter and looking at Roman in a way that just unnerved him.   “I didn’t… I don’t,” Roman stammered and drank his water nervously. He couldn’t say it. He left the kitchen. Thomas doesn’t want to hear it.   “Roman?” Thomas asked, following him. Roman headed upstairs and closed himself in his room. Thomas didn’t follow, luckily. Roman didn’t want to disappoint him again. He thought running would be free and just need to bother them one time. He didn’t realize the clothes were such a big deal. Roman leaned against the door and dropped his backpack on the floor next to him. He slightly pulled his hair as he ran his hands through it.   Roman slid down against the door and held his knees close to his chest. He didn’t have to join cross country. He could probably still back out. The sheet isn’t signed or anything. He wanted to make Patton happy, but Roman was used to being a disappointment. It was better than being a burden. Roman sighed and got up, picking up his backpack and dragging it to the desk. He had a shit-ton of homework to do and didn’t have time to mope. —   “Want to help us pick what to make for dinner?” Patton asked through the door after a quick knock. Roman rubbed his eyes, uncrossing them after looking up from his textbook.   “Too much homework. I’m fine with whatever,” Roman called back and glanced back down at his textbook. He fought the urge to just bash his head into it to try to force it into his brain physically.   “Maybe you should take a break, kiddo,” Patton replied. Roman managed to bite his tongue before he said he was fine again, but he did literally bite his tongue and it kind of hurt. He held open his mouth and felt it pulse slightly, but it didn’t taste like it was bleeding. “Roman?”   “Ah bit mah tongue,” Roman tried to reply. “Sorree,”   “Is it bleeding?” Patton asked with concern through the door.   “Nah, jus’ hur’,” Roman said and took a big drink of water. “Is good,”   “Can I get you some ice water for it?” Patton asked.   “No, is already fadin’,” Roman said and took another drink.   “Okay. I’ll come get you for dinner, then. Let us know if you need help with your homework,” Patton said.   “Kay,” Roman called back and rubbed his eyes again before getting back to catching up to the classwork. Why can’t teachers all use the same syllabus so Roman doesn’t have to do this all the time? Roman sighed. His eyes hurt from reading all this shit. Packets at least are the easiest way to do classwork and some of his teachers game him some. It’s like a scavenger hunt for answers in the textbook. What he wouldn’t give for some skittles right now, though. He was running out of steam. He was just going to finish this page and take a break. There was no way he could finish all this tonight, anyway.   Roman came down the stairs and waved awkwardly to Thomas as Roman passed his office. Thomas didn’t notice him, though. He headed into the kitchen, instead.   “Hey, are you okay if I take Lita on a quick run?” Roman said, pulling a water bottle out of the fridge.   “Go ahead, kiddo. Sounds like a nice break,” Patton said, stirring something savory smelling on the stove. Lita was wagging her tail brightly at Roman’s feet and made a very cute noise when Roman reached for the leash on the hook.   “Who’s a marvelous girl,” Roman cooed and scratched behind her ear before hooking up her leash. “See ya,” He waved to Patton before being nearly yanked out of the house by Lita.   Running in the cool evening air was much nicer than any other time of day. Lita was boisterously bolting as fast as Roman would let her go as usual. She stopped at the same stop sign and fire hydrant again. Dogs really were creatures of habit. Humans, too, probably. Roman kind of wished he had that kind of stability to get habits. He got a cute photo of her hopped up on a rock and barking at a squirrel up in the tree that threw something at her. She growled and Roman gave her leash a few gentle tugs and she jumped off and walked away from the squirrel angrily.   They settled back into a run after she was done fuming about the squirrel’s audacity. Which was very funny and lifted Roman’s mood a bit. The run helped clear his head, though not much. He probably should have thought to try running for fun instead of for work before. It was nicer than just working out in his room. Having a dog to run with was likely what made this nice, though. They turned the corner and Roman pushed himself to sprint as fast as possible to squeeze that last bit of run out of Lita. She raced excitedly up to the door, panting happily as she came inside. She trotted happily to the kitchen to get some water, and Roman followed.   “We’re back,” Roman said to Patton as he passed to the fridge for more cold water.   “Hey, there, kiddo! Did you have a nice run?” Patton smiled.   “Yeah, weather is nice outside right now,” Roman said and enjoyed some water. “Check out this photo I got of Lita yelling at a squirrel for throwing an acorn or something at her,” Roman said and pulled up the photo on his phone.   “Oh!” Patton cooed. “She’s got such an angry little face!” Patton squatted down to pet Lita. “Did that mean old squirrel assault you?” He rubbed her head and neck between both hands and Lita wagged her tail in a wide arc and licked his hand. Patton got up to wash his hands with a smile. “Send me that, wouldja?”   “Oh, sure,” Roman shrugged and sent it to Patton, then washed his hands right after him. “Do you need any help with dinner?”   “Nah, I’ve got it,” Patton shook his head and went back to cooking.   “Um, let me know if you do,” Roman mumbled and left the kitchen. He really didn’t want to go back to homework just yet. Dinner smelled good, and he was feeling lazy. Roman flopped down on the couch with the family laptop, opting for Minecraft. He probably didn’t have enough time to play the adventure game for long, but he could play creative mode for a bit.   Virgil came downstairs while Roman was working on his mansion behind a waterfall and leaned forward on the couch, watching Roman build as he laid across the couch with the laptop.   “You need the laptop or something?” Roman asked, trying to turn his head to see the answer. Virgil stuck his arm out to sign ‘no’ almost like a hand puppet. Roman shrugged and went back to placing the carpet pattern. Virgil stayed and watched, which was unexpected. Mostly because Virgil was willingly standing within three feet of Roman. He’d probably bolt if Roman made any sudden moves. Roman would, at least. Roman gave him a confused look, but he just shrugged in response. Virgil just watched quietly as Roman kept placing blocks.    Roman was putting vines on some marble pillars when Patton interrupted him.   “Dinner’s ready,” Patton called from the kitchen. Roman saved and quit while Virgil headed into the kitchen. Whatever it was, it smelled good. Roman put the laptop back on the side table and went to go eat dinner.

[incorrectsanders]

So I’ve just learned I have no classes with any of my fiends so I’m going to completely alone in a new school, I’m stressed out and I have idea of how to make new friends because I’ve had my already existing friends for almost 5 years. Can I have something to get my mint off of all of this please? 💛💛

Oh no! I’m sorry you don’t have classes with your friends, I know how much that sucks :/ 

When it comes to making new friends, just talk to the people around you before class starts or when teachers say to introduce yourself! I started high school in a new county, and I knew no one. In PE, I made friends with a girl who was really sweet by saying “Hey! Are you looking for the locker rooms too?”. In Biology, I made friends with a guy by saying “Oh, aren’t you in my Theatre class too? First period?”. In Spanish, there weren’t enough seats so me and three other girls and one guy had to sit up on the counters. We made friends with each other simply because we thought it was a funny situation. 

I’m a senior in college. Out of those six people, I’m only still friends with one. (Bio kid. He’s a fukin nerd and lives 1700 miles away for college and I love the hell out of him). But they’re all still nice people! I completely get that you’re stressed but I hope it helps to know that everyone else is too! They’re all in similar predicaments, esp. if you’re a first year in your school. Take a breath, try to find something in common with the people around you. Look at backpacks and binders! Maybe someone has a pin or keychain from something you like!

Or take it a step further. I personally decorate my backpack and purse and keys with all kinds of stuff. (Sanders Sides pins, Disney pins, Panic! patches, My Hero Academia and Steven Universe keychains, a Pan Cakes pin). Even in college, people will see my backpack and point one out and it’ll start a conversation. I can’t tell you how many friends I’ve made in classes because of my backpack or the stickers on my laptop. My best friend who I live with now warmed up to me back in community college because of the Harry Styles and Niall Horan keychains on my backpack. She isn’t even a big fan, she just said that because I liked them, I reminded her of her sister. 

I know its scary, especially if you’re shy, but I promise it’ll be okay! Okay, advice column over. Here, have some fluff that stemmed from me and my friend joking around about My Hero Academia 

There was definitely something wrong with Logan. All day, he’d been in his serious mode because of the work he’d been doing with Joan. According to Joan, they had quite a few horrible clients that day. The mood Logan was in, testy and snappy was normal, and they knew it would go away fairly soon. What wasn’t normal was when he got to their game night, sat down on the couch, scowled, and looked over at Virgil who was walking out from the kitchen.

“Virgil.” He snapped. Virgil jumped, and the rest of their eyes widened. Logan snapped at them sometimes, sure, but he rarely snapped at Virgil, and he also rarely called him Virgil. 

Yeah, something was wrong with Logan. 

“What the hell, Specs?” Dee asked. “What did he do to you?”

“Come here.” Logan said in the same tone, ignoring Dee completely. Virgil rose an eyebrow. Logan didn’t act like this. And what did he want? Cautious but not worried, he stepped forward. Once he was within reach, Logan tugged Virgil into his lap, reached his hands up, and squished his cheeks. 

A noise of protest and confusion rose from the his lips, just as a grin stretched across Logan’s face. 

“Loogaaaan!” Virgil whined the best he could with his cheeks pressed in. He knew what this was. Patton used to do it all the time to them when he was stressed, ever since they were teens. 

Logan did it sometimes to them, but it was different. A quick squish of their cheeks, a smirk and a condescending little coo, then a ruffle of their hair as he moved on. But this? The grin told him this was full Patton. 

“There’s my baby!” Logan cooed, pinching his cheeks and ignoring his boyfriend’s whines. “There he is! Oh, aren’t you just the cutest thing in the world! I’ve missed you all day! Yes I have, yes I have!” He cooed, then started babbling nonsense like he would to a baby as he nuzzled their noses together. 

“Logan, stop! This isn’t funny!” Virgil said, holding back his own smile. The others couldn’t help but be amused by the scene in front of them. Patton couldn’t hold back his own squeal as he pulled out his phone to record it. 

Logan gasped. “Pouty baby.” He declared, pulling the corners of Virgil’s mouth down with his thumbs. “Pouty angry baby.” He mocked, feigning his own angry face. “Pouty pouty boy. Smile. Smiiiile...” He said, then pushed his cheeks up. “Smiley baby! Pouty baby. Smiley baby! Pouty.”

Everyone was laughing now, even Virgil was alternating in between little giggle fits and trying to tell Logan to knock it off. 

“Oh my god, I’ve never seen him like this.” Remy said fondly. 

“It’s cute.” Joan cooed. 

“Stoop!” Virgil whined loudly. 

“Stop? Okay, pouty, I’ll stop. But first, who’s my baby? Who’s my Shining Starlight? Who? Who’s my cute little Kitten?” Logan asked. Virgil only giggled louder. 

“Logan!” He shrieked, as his cheeks were pressed in again.

“Say it!”

“Okay, okay, me!”

Logan grinned, dropping his hands in favor of wrapping his arms around Virgil’s waist and squeezing him tight again. “My baby.” He sing-songed. “I see why Patton loves this so much. I feel much better now.” He hummed, setting his chin on Virgil’s shoulder like he hadn't just done that. 

No one said anything else about it either. As long as Logan wasn’t snappy anymore, they were fine with it.

[ofnifflersandkings]

Title: Fly By Night

Character: Miles Morales

A/n: I told myself I was gonna sift through requests and was having a little trouble so I decided to write this instead to help with creative flow. This is loosely based off of the song “Cecily Smith” from a musical by the same name of the title, which is a bop.

•

Miles adjusted his seat position for what felt like the 100th time since he first sat down, the chairs were too close together and it felt too fancy to sit comfortably.

Ganke sighed, looking over at Miles with a subdued chuckle. “The house lights aren’t even down yet and you’re acting like you’ve been here for years.”

Miles shot him a look and huffed, “I’m just trying to get comfortable, maybe it’ll pass the time.”

“Miles, this opera is over two hours long.”

He would have groaned had it not been for fear of annoying the onpour of thespians literally surrounding him. You had briefly explained the story to him, but a lot of it had left him.

“I don’t know why I agreed to this.”

Ganke let out a mock laugh. “Are you sure about that? Because I’m pretty positive it’s because (Y/n) asked you to come.”

Miles opened his mouth to retort his statement, but he didn’t have anything.

It’s not like he was wrong.

So instead, Miles ignored the cheeky look on Ganke’s face and turned his focus to the series of chandeliers hanging around the theatre.

Even if the show was boring, he could get some pretty sick new art designs from all the cool stuff in the opera house.

At one point in waiting for you to come back from the restrooms, explaining you didn’t want to miss a second of the show, Miles thought back to how he ended up here.

•

Miles was leaned against the locker next to you as you piled books into your backpack. The dismissal bell had gone off awhile ago but the two of you hung back to talk to your English teacher.

Fridays always made Miles particularly restless, more so than usual. Even after getting used to his schedule, school wore him out and he longed for days where he could sleep in and do nothing.

Granted, only if no one in Brooklyn needed his eminent help

“This is gonna sound odd,” You started, closing your locker door. “But do you wanna come see La Traviata with Ganke and I tomorrow?”

Miles’s head tilted his head. “Do I want to see what?”

You laughed, pulling the spare ticket from your coat pocket, holding it out to him. “It’s an opera, they’re showing it at the Met and our other friend had to go out of town. The ticket was too expensive to go to waste.”

Miles looked at the ticket and noticed the way you fiddled with it. “I mean, it’s okay if you don’t want to come! I just wanted to hang out with you more and the Met is really cool, so I thought I’d invite you.”

His perked up and he immediately held out his hands. “No! I’d love to come!”

“Are you sure?”

He put on the most charming smile he could muster. “All you had to do was ask, I’ll go wherever you want me to.”

•

By the time you maneuvered your way back into your seat, the house lights flickered to let the audience know the show was starting soon.

Ganke stood up from his seat just as you were about to sit down. “Here, you can sit in the middle. Your seat has a better view of the pit.”

Miles met Ganke’s eye and he winked at him, along with a big thumbs up.

“I’m so glad you came,” You whispered to him, making his attention immediately turn to you.

Miles went to say something back but the lights going out and the soft sounds of violins interrupted his words.

He was telling the truth when he told you he had never really listened to this sort of music. He had never really even thought to, but the sounds of the whole orchestra taking over the room made the hairs on his neck stand up.

When the stage lights came up a woman in a large and lavish looking white dress was surrounded by men and women in similar fashion.

The music had picked up and the woman, who he was assumed as Violetta, a character you mentioned earlier, began singing these crazy high notes.

Miles looked over at you with wide eyes and you stifled a laugh into your sleeve.

Since he could speak Spanish, he thought he could pick up on majority of the story. But the operatic singing made it sound so jarring to him, he ended up just watching the facial expressions of the actors.

You looked over and saw the way his eyebrows furrowed together as he strained himself to hear the words, so you thought you could help clarify.

“The man singing right now is Alfredo, he’s the main love interest for Violetta.”

Miles noticed the way your shoulder now slightly pressed into his as you leaned over to speak to him quietly. When he thought you might pull away, he prompted you further. “So, what’s going on now?”

“Oh, this is this the part where Alfredo tells Violetta that he loves her,” You pointed towards the stage.

“One day you passed before me...happy and as light as air,” You said between paused after the actors sang. “And ever since that day...Even without knowing it, I loved you.”

It took Miles a second to realize you were just translating what was going on in the scene, but it still made his face heat up and to become accurately aware of how close your face was to his. When it felt like his heart was competing with the drums of the orchestra, he fixed his eyes on the stage instead of you.

“But she refuses him, she tells him that she can only offer him friendship.” You told him just as Violetta turned away from Alfredo and began going off into a whirl of intense vibrato and turns.

You laughed and Miles let himself look at you again. “See, Violetta’s a bit of a flirt and doesn’t want to tie herself down to one man. She tells him because of this he should forget about her, but he objects.”

Miles admired your apparent mastery of the story and exactly what everyone’s characters were feeling, “You know a lot about this.”

You shrugged, “I’ve seen it a bunch of times, I like the music in it. Plus the characters are always so dramatic,” You sat up in your seat and gestured to the actors again. “See? She was just telling him to forget about her but now she tells him to return the flower when it withers, so the next day.”

He chuckled, happy to understand what was going on, and even happier to hear it all coming from you.

You hummed and your brows crinkled for a moment in thought. “Hm, maybe I should stop telling you all this. Apparently that’s supposed to ruin the experience of it.”

Miles met your gaze and gave you a small smile. “I don’t mind, I like hearing you talk,” He then cleared his throat. “About the show, I mean, not like I understood anything before you started explaining it.”

You beamed at his compliment, and resolved to be silent during the more intense parts and explain to him after one or before a longer scene.

“This part coming up is pretty sad. Alfredo’s father demands she breaks off her relationship with his son because of her reputation, and at first she refuses because she loves him to much. But he pleads with her until she agrees.”

“Well he sucks.”

You couldn’t help but laugh this time. “He does, but Alfredo is determined to win her back and take her home so...”

Miles was listening, promises on everything that he was, but he also couldn’t help but just watch your expression change as you explained it all. How your brows would raise with the music some moments and how during times when you were listening intently and slightly mouthed the words. It was all very endearing to him.

What pulled Miles out of his reverie, was when you placed your hands lighty ontop of his wrist, leaning foward in your seat. “This is the best part! But it’s sad too.”

You said something about how Violetta was dying from tuberculosis and how Alberto tries to get to her before the end. But he was looking down at your hand on his.

He tried to ignore it at first, kept his eyes locked on the stage but it felt like he could feel the exact weight of your hand in that moment.

What would Uncle Aaron do?

Then an idea bloomed in his head, and slowly he turned his hand over so your palms were pressed together. And then in an instant, your fingers were intertwined.

Miles positively beamed in his seat, but you were no drawn into the final moments of the opera that you could only give his hand a small squeeze.

And then the curtains fell.

•

You and Ganke had gotten into a rather lively discussion about how good you thought the set was and how wonderful the soprano sang.

And Miles was more than happy to listen to you two ramble on as you walked back to the dorms.

He felt your shoulder bump into his and he smiled, giving you his full attention.

“You weren’t too bored were you?”

Miles shook his head. “Nah, it wasn’t that bad. Plus I had a cute interpreter to tell me all about it.”

You stumbled over your next sentence as you stuffed your hands into your coat pockets. “I have tickets to see The Winter’s Tale a couple weeks from now. Maybe you might want to go? It’s in English so it’s easier to understand, but you don’t have to!”

Miles smiled and gently took your hand out of your pocket so he could hold it. “Just say when.”

[meximorrita]

Hi, I was wondering I could request Noir from Spider Verse with the song “Box of Secrets” by Zarif for the songfic requests?

Hi, anon! Of course you can! I am so sorry this took an eternity. But I really had troubles finishing it due I was out of inspiration, but oh boy, I AM BACK!

This is my first time writing for a Marvel character so I am sorry if this is not the best. Also this was translated from Spanish since that's my first language so I am sorry for any grammar errors you may find, but I pray you enjoy it.

Spanish version here (X)

Also anon, I wrote this with a gender neutral reader, I hope you don't mind.

_____

BOX OF SECRETS Spidernoir x GN!Reader

You were having a peaceful time chilling with the Spider family at May's living room. You could swear you almost forgot the pressure of being a superhero, you haven't felt like an ordinary person in a long time. Yeah, you were distracted by the conversation but mostly because you were too busy glimpsing at Noir. You had to admit it, the mysterious, serious and gentlemanly Spiderman got your eye from the first moment you saw him. Meanwhile Noir was paying attention to Porker who was trying to explain some jokes to him, it wasn't working as you could see. Peter only seemed highly confused and kept asking any sort of questions.

"...Tell us why, Y/N" Peter B's voice called you out. Shit! What had he said? He was staring at you as well as the others. You prayed that they didn't realize you were eyeing Noir."I-I am sorry, what was that?" You asked. Peter rolled his eyes "Pay attention. I am not that old for you guys to ignore...Am I?" You moved your hand in a "So so" gesture. He pouted. Gwen brought back the initial question "We were wondering, why is it that you never take your mask off? I mean, it has total sense in your Universe but here it has no use."

Right, the mask, you hadn't given it a thought yet. Peter B. And Gwen didn't wear them most of the time, even now they weren't wearing them. "Uhm" you mumble looking for an explanation "well I think is a bad habit" You laughed nervous "Since I'm always wearing it, I only get rid of it when I'm taking a shower or about to go to bed" you shrugged trying to lessen importance to it "But I don't know why am I the only one being questioned here. These two" You pointed at Noir and Porker "Never take them off as well"

They joined the conversation. "Literally I am a pig." He said kinda bugged." I don't know what were you expecting" "What about you, Peter?" Penny's sweet voice asked "A hero's identity is a precious secret. This mask is the one thing standing between those rotten eggs out there and my home." Everybody went quiet after his answer "Peter, you aren't in your Universe you know?" Miles pointed out "Here nobody has idea of who you are. Plus, we already know you're Peter Parker" Noir was muted for some time and finally said "That's quite right but, still, It isn't going off." "As you want" Peter B. responded.

A little bit of chatting later, bedtime had arrived. Miles had school the next day and, frankly the rest of the team needed to rest. That's how Peter and you were left alone. "Woah Peter, you really like being mysterious, uh?" You tried to start a conversation "I'm guessing being a private eye had something to do with that". "Fella" his low voice answered you as he accommodated his hat in the right place "After all I've seen, it's a miracle I'm not inside a wooden kimono. I like to believe luck's always been on my side. " You nodded slowly. You couldn't help but feel sorrowful for his unfortunated life. You just couldn't sit there arms crossed, you felt the urge to do something about it, maybe that intriguing man needed a friend. Even if you felt like it was a stupid idea you had to try it.

Open up your box of secrets

Take one out for me

"Hey Peter!" Your voice went up as an idea crossed your mind "I don't feel like sleeping and I think there's a place near by where we can get an egg cream, wanna go?" You couldn't believe what you had said but it was the best you could come up with. Your heart was beating fast, why? You were hanging out merely as friends, nothing else. But if that was so, why did you expected him to accept so badly? Noir gave you a susprised look "Well, that sounds like a good idea." You sighed in relief. "Awesome!" You walked towards that place wearing your spider suits but people just took a quick look at you thinking you were nothing more than spiderman fans.

The place was nothing out of the usual and you could count at most 5 people there. You ordered the egg creams and something to eat. At first, it was kinda uncomfortable due Peter's serious nature and also because you still felt uneasy to be having dinner with the man that had caught your attention. The conversation slowly went better; Peter talked to you about how was like to grow in the middle of the great depression while you chanted about your family and your hometown. Of course, you were the one doing the most part of the conversation but he didn't seem to mind, actually, you could tell he was gladly listening to you by the amount of questions he came up with. "Yeet?" "It's just a meme" "A meme?!"

I'll show the number on my ticket

And take one home with me

Oh the night just got better and better. Eventually the conversation took you to the top of a building. It was a quiet night for New York, the lights of the city danced right under your feet and a small breeze got to you along with the night bustle. Now you were so happy, having Peter next to you, being so honest and open with you made nothing but make you smile tenderly at him. Sooner or later the conversation stopped, leaving you contemplating the view in front of you. "Peter" your sweet tone interrupted the silence "Why did you tell me all of that?" You questioned. Noir kept his gaze to the horizon not giving you an answer. He waited a few seconds meditating his answer. You were right, he barely even knew you but he poured his heart out without hesitating. "Being honest, I have no idea. You are so kind and true. I guess I trusted you enough to tell you. Of course, I omitted the most disturbing parts." That was so sweet coming from him but his tone on the last sentence made your heart sank. Behind his words you could perceive so much pain and rage, you wanted to cry. "Peter, you are a box full of Secrets. Thanks for sharing it with me." You put your hand on his and looked him right into his eyes offering him a soft, comforting smile "If I had to guess, I would say that all it needs to get information from you is an egg cream" you tried to lighten the mood and shook your head playfully.

"Well Peter, I can assure you that I feel the same way about you, like if I could tell you anything" Peter froze flustered at your unexpected words. That was so weird, so unusual comming from him. "You know what?!" You continued "Since we've got so personal. Here goes one of my secrets" you pulled your hand away from his and took it up to your face. Will you ever learn to not have such dumb ideas? Maybe one day but now you were sure to show Peter a part of the real you by removing your mask. You smirked subtlety "This" you pointed at your bare face "is my face". You obtained no response from the suited man.

Noir was astonished at your revelation. You were far more attractive than he had imagined. The first thing he focused in were your bright eyes than seemed so captivating that night. Later he took notice of your tempting lips curled in a precious smile. "Holy..." you could barely hear it "I know, fighting the crime makes you look 10 years older" you laughed nervous "What do you think?" You finally questioned. "I think" Noir interrupted his response so that he wouldn't stumble over his words. "I think you are a total knockout" he said softly. You felt flustered and he noticed it "Well, thank..." "But in that case you should know my identity as well" he added before taking off his mask without hesitating. Your heart slipped a beat when you finally saw his eyes, they showed so much affliction yet so much spark and determination. You noticed his dark hair messed up because of the mask. You studied the various scars decorating face, they led you to his striking lips that you've ached to kiss since you met him. You were speechless before this man. "I know it looks bad but, c'mon it isn't that bad" His words bewildered you "What?! Did you just make a joke, Peter Parker?! You?! You know? After your face this is the second revelation of the night. I've seen everything now" Peter let out a cute laugh that you adored "I may know one or two things about joking. Porker isn't an awful teacher." He explained "Now, It's my turn to ask, what do you think?" "I think I wouldn't mind to kiss that face of yours" You said almost instinctively. You didn't move an inch but Peter only got closer and closer until your lips melt in a cherished kiss. What a way to end the night. "Peter now more than ever, you're a box of secrets" you said before meeting your lips again.

Show me show me what you got

Take it take it soak it up

Open up your box of secrets

Take one out for me

[meggannn]

the itsv commentary is so full of great facts and bts info so i wanted to write down all my favorite parts, but i just ended up writing down anything that was interesting, which was honestly most of it. four thousand words later i ended up with their commentary on practically half the movie. i’ve put the interesting or funny bits that i jotted down behind a cut if anyone is interested.

this commentary audio had Phil Lord (co-writer, producer), Chris Miller (producer), Bob Persichetti (co-director), Peter Ramsay (co-director), Rodney Rothman (co-director, co-writer), but it was kind of difficult to tell who was talking most of the time, so i didn’t include names on who said what, unless I knew for certain who was talking.

The first Miles sticker in the film is a “glitch” flashing on the Sony Pictures Animation logo. “Already putting his stamp on the movie.”

RIPeter is meant to be an amalgamation of all the Spider-Man we know, “good and bad” (as the dance happens, someone corrects him:) “Good and GREAT.”

(“I’ve got an excellent theme song, and a... so-so popsicle.”)

“That joke saved the movie.” “The dance move or the popsicle?” “The dance move. I resisted that dance joke and Rodney pushed hard for it (…) It told the audience what movie they were watching.”

“It was Rodney who was really pushing for him to be in this relatable idea of [Miles] not knowing the lyrics to this song but singing along.” “We started animating before the song was finished. It was really easy to not know the words then.”

“There are three very long shots that introduce Miles.” (The shot at home, the shot of him walking past Brooklyn Middle, the shot of him entering Visions.) “That was a deliberate choice, to open with a big crazy Spider-Man montage, and then with Miles, start a different pace, long shots, and just watch him and how he is, and don’t get too fancy with it. Although ironically these shots are really fancy.” The shot of him walking past Brooklyn Middle and the one of him walking into Visions are meant to directly contradict each other: his comfort zone vs him out of place in new surroundings. (Megan’s note: My take is that with these shots they might have been trying to represent his home, his past, and his future.)

“Everything [in this scene from color to sound] is meant to go from a very heightened experience with Peter to a very naturalistic experience with Miles.”

For the scene in the car, Shameik and Brian sat in chairs to set up in a car, with microphones and a rearview mirror. “Brian might have even been a little annoyed at Shameik a couple of times, and I think you can feel it in here, in a really wonderful way.”

(Talking about the chromatic aberration) “Sometimes it looks like you’re watching a 3D movie without the glasses on.” “That was on purpose.” “Every frame is supposed to feel like a piece of printed art.”

“On the cover of Great Expectations, there’s an image of Magwitch grabbing Pip’s shoulder in a cemetery.” “Foreshadowing!”

A side character named “Smiley Kid” is in several shots of miscellaneous Visions students. “Because he’s not a real person, I think we can say he is our least favorite person.” “I think he comes around. He’s great, then he’s bad, then he’s great again.” “He’s like the extra in every live action who worms his way to the front of every shot.” “He just almost always looks in the camera.”

Miles’s expression when the teacher calls him out at trying to fail was “completely ripped off of President Barack Obama.”

Benson Avenue was meant to call back to where one of their fathers grew up in Bensonhurst, Brooklyn.

(“Hypnotize” by Notorious BIG playing on Aaron’s stereo) “Biggie Smalls in an animated Spider-Man movie. In what universe?” “This is the ideal timeline that we’re living in.”

(This comment is said as Miles presses his face on the glass:) “That changed people’s perceptions of the movie. When we had this in, it really lit people up.” (To be honest, I can’t tell if this comment was made in response to Biggie Smalls, or to Miles pressing his face on the glass.)

They all loved Mahershala Ali. “The shoulder touch would work if your voice sounded like Mahershala’s.” Everyone was in awe every time they recorded with him. “He makes you want to be a better person when you’re around him.” “He’s got a high bar.” “Then he goes away and it kinda wears off.”

The subway Aaron brings Miles to was a place he and Jeff used to paint in when they were young, which adds another layer to him talking about/missing Jeff when he mentions it to Miles. The age difference probably means Aaron was younger than Jeff, and now he’s the older one with Miles here.

There’s a bigger history between Jeff and Aaron that’s only hinted at, and part of it is the reason why Miles has his mother’s last name, not his father’s. It’s implied Jeff was worried his bad history would follow Miles if he took his last name. Also because “then he would be named Miles Davis.”

They were excited to depict a spider-man experiencing spider-sense for the first time.

“We did the most expensive thing. In all choices.”

“People ask, How does Miles with a cop and nurse parents afford Jordans? And the answer is, they were a gift from his uncle.”

(On Kingpin’s animation possibilities.) “We always had this idea that he was the living expression of a black hole. The right for him is this floating head on a body that we could scale up and down depending on the shot with hands at the end of arms.” “While creating a black hole, he is a black hole.”

Someone felt very passionate about including the dimensional map showing the other universes the collider was connecting with. “It felt so important to me.”

(Paraphrasing this one) “Once Phil and Lord gave the MO to push convention, the gauntlet had been thrown, we started getting crazy stuff back. And a lot of the time our art direction would just be like, ‘Yeah! COOL!' ‘Do more of that!’”

(Peter rolls his eyes as the Prowler menacingly steps forward) “I like that [RIPeter] is exhausted at the idea of being killed.”

“The Prowler chase sequence was the first sequence that went through the whole pipeline.” (This and the cemetery scene were the first.)

(The burst card of Miles jumping over the subway tracks) Bob Persichetti: “I had such high hopes to do a lot of burst cards, I think that’s the only one I actually did.”

(as Rio comforts Miles in Spanish) “We never translated on screen (…) The idea being, this is the fabric of Miles’s life.” “This was inspired obviously by Brian Michael Bendis” (co-creator of Miles Morales and his longtime writer) “and Miles’ bicultural background. But also Phil Lord grew up in a bilingual house.” “And I took Spanish in high school.”

(Stan Lee cameo) “[Stan is] the only performer in the movie who we went to. Everyone else came into recording studios, but Stan Lee, we dispatched the microphone to him.” “Everybody wanted to animate Stan.” “If you hit pause any time a train goes by, because everyone wanted to animate Stan, he’s in almost every single train.” “He’s an extra in a lot.”

(Miles reading comics before jumping off the building) “If you notice in that comic book, it’s True Life Tales of Spider-Man, and to keep his cover, his name is not Peter Parker. In the comic book, his name is Billy Barker.” “Great.” “Who could ever figure that out, right?”

A bunch of drawings around the grave of Peter Parker’s tombstone were all done by different kids of people on the show.

They mention the cemetery scenes was one of the first ones finalized. When they were still trying to figure out how to bring Miles to life, “you can see that his performance evolved from this [cemetery] scene.” “It’s super expressive.”

There was lots of debate on how much paunch should be on Peter B’s stomach. There are something like 3-5 different body models used throughout the movie.

They all loved the scenes of Peter B in his apartment: the cut to him crying in the shower, to pinned to the bed with his butt out, to his pose on the futon flipping through channels. Someone really liked “[his] little quivering [spidey] eyes on the seahorse shot.”

The comic book page-flipping device was a “late breaking” realization of how to transition between flashbacks and present day.

Chris Miller did the voice of the cop dispatcher on the radio saying the “Child dressed like Spider-Man dragging a homeless corpse behind a train” line. “The role I was born to play.”

In the walk-and-talk scene in the alley, they felt inspired to take a lot of crazy shots. “We were passionate that a Spider-Man movie needed to be shot from their point of view, where every surface can be the ground.”

“Because of questions on the internet, we took of one of Miles’s shoes. Just in case anybody wanted to know why he was sticking.” “Another thing that I was passionate about but nobody cared about but me.”

“One of the big tricks of this sequence and of this relationship was to let you believe that Peter was a good guy even though he was being a real… turkey… to Miles.” (Peter saying “No, does it look like it’s working? No! No, it’s not…”) “This was one of the few moments that we added kind of late just to know that he was a sweet pea underneath it all.” “Finding the right level for his not caring about Miles, and then learning to care about Miles, finding the right level from the beginning all the way through to the end, was something that took a lot of nuance.”

The interrogation/alley and burger scenes probably went through the most amount of reworks and rewriting than any others, because there was so much exposition and “you got tired” watching two heavy information scenes in a row. And given how often they said “this scene went through so many iterations” in this commentary, these two scenes must have been a LOT of rewrites. (Some of the alternate burger scenes can be seen in the film’s trailers and alternate universe cut.)

“I still kind of miss the unfinished version of this shot, where his feet… He had no toes for a really long time for some reason.” “You had to say like fifty times, ‘We’re gonna add toes right?’” “‘We’re gonna get his toes on there, right?’”

“One of the things about Kingpin is that he just magically appears outside of the car. Because there’s no way he could get actually get through the doorway.” “Maybe in the future where you guys are watching this ten years from now, someone will have figured out how to animate that. But in 2018 it’s still impossible.”

(Miles finding Peter in the vents) “These moments were really when you started to feel the relationship between the two of them develop.” “I love that Miles has to fight to occupy the same space and become an equal to Peter.”

(Peter mockingly blah-blahing as Doc Ock explains the danger of the collider, then saying afterward “Oh nevermind, that is bad.”) “For the sake of a laugh, we undercut the stakes, and then immediately had to buy the stakes back.”

“We went through probably 70 different version of what Miles would look like while invisible … and I like how how he comes in and out of invisibility was stylized to some degree.”

They say the Doc Ock/Peter scene was “really really bad at one point” and now it’s “one of the most wonderful surprises.”

Ock’s computer is based off of Phil Lord’s actual desktop. Some files are cut off the edges of the screen because they just dragged things off of the internet.

(Peter glitching in the chair) “I’m remembering all of the conversations that determined that it was funniest if you left Peter’s head unglitched.”

It was Justin Thompson’s idea to use soft robotics for this version of Dock Ock’s tentacles.

Everyone, from animation to the sound team, saw Doc Ock’s tentacles about 3 months before completion, went (exasperated) “Oh THAT’S what they look like? We’ll have to redo X Y Z whole thing…”

You can tell they loved the monitor joke. “Very silly things happening around very cool things.”

The Bagel! text was added last minute. “That was a joke pitch by Justin that was taken seriously.”

“Everyone felt empowered to pitch crazy ideas, and that’s why it felt so rich and deep.”

“It’s no understatement to say that this look in the forest is one of the hardest things in a movie like this. To make something look realistic is something we know how to do pretty well. But to make it look graphic and illustrative is almost impossible.” “Especially when you’re close and far to trees within the same shot at times.” “We had so many conversations with Danny, our V Effects supervisor, like, ‘But, you guys, we’re going to be in a forest, you really don’t want the leaves to rustle in the wind?' ‘No, we’ll be okay!’” (Later, when Peter and Miles swing off together, the leaves rustle:) “See, the leaves can move, guys!” “We just CHOSE for them not to.” “It was an absolute creative choice.”

“This is another moment in the story when we really open this beat up to let Peter and Miles have a victory together and cement their bond, that you really were rooting for their relationship. We breezed through this quickly and you didn’t have the same connection with the two of them.” “One of the things in the screenplay that we discovered really late is that you needed to have a lot of smaller, positive accomplishments throughout the center of the movie to have it work right.” “(…) This middle section of the movie is about Peter and Miles learning to fall for each other, basically.”

(During Gwen’s intro) “We give just enough to hopefully tease you guys into being really into each one of these characters’ origin story.”

“One week of days and nights just passed in that one shot.” “She hit a time anomaly on her way to this dimension.”

“She vibes with Miles after he had been bitten by the spider, and she purposefully bumped into him there, in case you didn’t catch that.”

“We were trying to make Ock such an intelligent and socially awkward person that then turns into this really formidable equal to Kingpin.”

(When Peter thwips May’s doorbell and then exhales with his hands on his hips.) “One of my favorite poses in the movie.” “That pose gets a laugh all by itself.”

“‘You look tired’ is a thing my mom says to me every time I see her.” “It’s accurate.”

“I fought hard to have (May) kick that door open.” “I tried to cut that and then you uncut it, correctly.” “Let’s be honest, she’s not treating her house very well.”

(In the Spidey Lair) “Lots of Easter eggs here.” “We should’ve put an actual Easter egg in this shot.”

They debated for a long time putting the B-team spiders in the picture at all, knowing it would be more work, wanting to make their characters worth being in the picture without taking away from Miles. “Nothing worked in the movie until it had something to do with Miles and his story.”

(On the spider team testing Miles:) This angle was “late-breaking, on the backside”: “This made it feel like they all cared about Miles, even though they maybe didn’t believe in him.” “Just Peter going ‘Cool it.’ For the longest time we didn’t have something like that.”

(Pretty sure this is Peter Ramsay) “When you’re making a movie it’s like you’re building an emotion machine. You’ve gotta have all the parts calibrated the right way, make sure it’s properly oiled, cause if it isn’t, the gears are gonna stick, and you’re not gonna feel right.”

The Prowler Sound™ is not a jaguar or cat, but an elephant. “We only did the dark scenes first cause they were easier to light.” (Some of those scenes they mention are Miles running from the Prowler, the cemetery scene, Miles writing the note in Aaron’s apartment.)

They tried about a million songs for Peni while she makes a new goober. (The song used is not in the soundtrack, but it’s “Want It Here” by Xenia Pax.)

(On Peni’s Heelies) “This shot’s not long enough to get her from the kitchen to the couch.” “Is that why?!” “That’s one hundred percent why. Just put those little wheelies on here!”

In the first draft, there was an idea there RIPeter was a grad student under tutelage of male Doc Ock so that’s how Liv and Ock knew each other.

“The table pushing into Miles. That was something my older brother, when we would fight when we were kids, he would do that to me.”

(When Aaron closes his eyes, refusing to kill Miles:) “That little look. ‘Cause he knows what’s coming.”

(They’re all quiet as Miles carries Aaron to safety, caught up in the scene.) “We’re all kind of gripped.” “We’re supposed to be giving interesting anecdotes here, guys, come on.” “It was so cold that day…”

Prowler’s death was the first session they did with Mahershala. “He’s a method actor, and his death scene, it was like he was really dying.”

“We gave animators the freedom. You can make Miles unattractive. He can ugly cry, because this is raw and it feels so emotional.”

(When Miles throws his sketchbook out the window, only for it to immediately come flying back in:) “It’s a one-shot transition from deep emotion and regret and pain. We said, ‘He’s gonna throw the one thing out that really represents his uncle, yet it’s gonna come flying back in.’ It was hard to make that shot work.” “It’s a great story statement that you can’t lose the things that make up your past.”

When everyone is talking about someone they’ve lost, an alternate line has Ham saying “I lost my uncle. He was electrocuted, and it smelled so good.” It got a lot of laughs, but the team says that from then on, the audience “resisted” Ham because he killed the mood, and it was hard for people to see him as anything other than a goofy cartoon, so they changed the line to “Miles, the hardest part about this job is you can’t always save everyone.” (Megan’s note: I think they probably didn’t bother to re-animate the others’ facial reactions after changing Ham’s line, because judging by the reactions from Peter and Miles in this shot it feels like Ham just said something annoying/out of place lol.)

When Peter says “It wasn’t their decision” (for Miles to stay behind), Miles has a very quick reaction shot where he turns away, bites his lip, and shakes his head. Someone mentions it’s one of their favorite shots of Miles.

(On the scene with Miles and his dad at the door) “When Brian Tyree Henry saw this scene [with a rough performance, just animation], he got the movie. It made such an impression on him. He was very happy to come in and pick any lines up for us and just keep working.” “We were working on the shots on layup for this. The idea of having them be on thirds to start, then coming closer, and finally ending with the final split-screen shot at the end.” “And Jefferson crosses the scene, which I think is really interesting. They start off on opposite sides of the screen. He makes the first move.” “It’s amazing to me to see Miles transformed by his father.” “It feels earned.”

“In an earlier version of that scene, Aunt May gave him a version of that speech, which was nice, but it needed to be Dad.”

(Later on, someone mentions:) “Tom was the first one to say ‘It shouldn’t be Aunt May at the door, it should be Dad.’ And we all sort of slapped our foreheads going ‘That’s absolutely right.’”

“After our premiere, my 9yo son [Luca? Luka?] asked me this. ‘So Papa, you know Miles spray-paints one of those suits and it becomes his suit. Super cool, Papa, but it shouldn’t fit him. It’s way bigger.’” (Laughter) “Did he have to wait a few hours for it to dry?” "We cut out the sequence where Aunt May sewed it tighter and altered it.” “And they had the hair-dryer express drying it. ‘Your friends are in danger.’ ‘Well just let me let it dry first!” “I tell you, spray paint, five minutes and you’re dry.” “She pre-altered it. She knew he was coming. She said, ‘It took you long enough.’ It all happened in advance.”

“The scene of Miles falling and everything slowing down and I always appreciated that Phil called out he was ‘falling and rising’ and the same time.” “It made the movie. A rare thing that goes from the stage directions all the way through production and onto the screen.”

“This sequence used to end with him getting hit by a truck. But really felt like it was time for Miles to get a big victory.” (Megan’s note: This scene is shown in draft stage in the alternate universe cut. Miles makes his leap, free-runs over some trucks and buildings, and his scene is interrupted when he gets hit by a truck and crashes to the ground. There’s a moment where he collects himself, the pushes himself to his feet and runs off into the city to join the others at the collider. I interpret this idea to be their showing how Miles fully embraces the “Get back up” lesson, since Miles’s pose in the sketches imitates the same one in the basement when the spiders are hazing him and he’s on the ground.) “And now people applaud.” “There’s a general attitude with this movie that was like, ‘How can we do things differently?’ That was a case of when we were like, ‘What if we didn’t have the audience feel really good in this moment?” (Laughter) “What if we had them feel really bad? Right at the moment they want to feel good, what if we made them feel terrible?” (Joking) “Let’s poke THEM in the eye.” “I think in early drafts, we just were like, Miles is losing and falling short the whole movie until the very end. And when we put that up, we realized that you needed to see him slowly winning and winning and winning until he won even bigger at the end.”

A set-up that never fully made it in the movie is that Fisk runs charities for Spider-Man and that’s why the dinner was set up like it was.

The bread scene was on the chopping block for a long time. “By adding this interaction, and making it about Peter and MJ and something real, all of a sudden this scene was worth it.” “It’s necessary to know what Peter’s giving up by sacrificing himself.” “It lasts just long enough because we learned that if you stay way from Miles too long--” (They interrupt here to point out two cameo people at dinner, “Danny and Josh,” who I couldn’t get a cap of) “--We lose our connection to the movie in a way. But at this point we care enough about Peter to want him to get back to MJ too.”

“The servers that were holding the movie were moving slow by the end of this shoot. And we had the best computers.” “At a certain point I think we overloaded Imageworks’ server. There was a moment they were afraid the movie was going to break their machine.” “Which was our whole idea. Our whole approach was, how do we break these pipes that make the movie?”

(During the final collider fight sequence, but they don’t specify what idea this was about specifically:) Chris Miller: “One of the only times I can ever remember saying ‘Okay you’ve gone too far.’ There was one brand where I was like, ‘I don’t get this.’ A few of the drawings that were somehow even more insane than this.” “What you’re saying, Chris, is that there’s a version of this scene that’s even crazier than this?” “Literally the only time I can remember going, ‘Okay guys, you’ve done it. You’ve broken it.’”

“I’m sure there’s are filmmakers watching this, so I think this is a learnable lesson from this sequence. Which is if you want to put something super crazy in your movie, wait until the very end when a lot of movie has been spent on your movie and your release date is 3 to 4 months away and they literally cannot stop you or else they have no movie.”

One of them points out Miles webs a turntable to propel himself upward. (Megan’s note: Miles also does this just as his own theme starts playing, which starts off with a record-scratch. I thought that was cool.)

(The moment when Gwen calls Miles “Spider-Man”:) “That choice went through a lot of iterations like “What’s the end of their relationship?” That she calls him Spider-Man instead of giving him a kiss on the cheek? It makes me well up just thinking about it.”

Kingpin breaks the glass of a building and the pieces fly toward Miles. Bob Persichetti calls these “Dorito chips.”

After the train enters a collider steam, there are versions of the interior of the train that flash from all five dimensions. There’s a futuristic Peni version, an old-timey Noir version, there’s a Gwen version… “As it passes through the beam, you get to see five versions of the train existing at once.”

(Vanessa and Richard seeing Kingpin) “This idea of repeating mistakes (for Kingpin). No matter what, he was gong to keep repeating these mistakes.” “He’s still who he is.”

“It was my dream to have Kingpin headbutt Miles and it finally came true.”

Each one of these character is in a black costume, and black surrounds them, and yet you can still see what’s happening.

“I remember people wanting to cut the shoulder-touch at the end.” “Who wanted to cut this?!” (Overlapping chatter) “No names in the screen.” “I remember feeling, oh my god. You’re LUCKY you got the shoulder touch in.” “The fact that you could pay off a set up that wasn’t even a set up…”

(On Miles seeing inside the universe as the collider explodes) “And then this. How long can it be? Let’s make it way too long!”

“The Anvil (that clanks at the end) was in Ham’s pocket?” “In the hammer space.”

(Miles hugs Jefferson) “This was the moment everybody went ‘Oh, YES.’ No matter what, we have to get to the hug, and the disguised voice, and the ‘I love you.’”

Someone describes the ending soundtrack as “Miles’ playlist meets Aaron’s playlist meets a superhero movie.”

They indirectly confirm Peter B and MJ do get back together. “Peter B gets his happy ending.” Another bit someone mentions was a late addition.

“I like that the movie starts and ends with Miles in his bedroom by himself.”

“We could do a whole other commentary saying completely different things.” “Probably four.” “We should do an alternate universe commentary.”

“You’re your own champion, I think that’s the idea. This is a story of empowerment. A champion is not coming from outside of you to come and save you. It’s your job.”

(As the credits roll) “Every name you see right now, we’ve seen them cry.” “We’ve made them cry.” “Every name you see right now has yelled at us.”

(On the post-credits scene) “We thought of this (post-credits scene) two months ago.” (They recorded this commentary in Dec 2018.) “We wanted to get Miguel in there and show the opportunities of where the multiverse could go.”

“I looked this up. This IS the most expensive dumb joke of all time.”

“We didn’t finish cleaning the cell on that close-up of Spider-Man.”

[alphabees-writes]

Glee - S1 E3 (Acafellas)

“I’m excited to watch this one, only because I remember actually really liking the Acafellas covers? Let’s see how hard I cringe now!

I’d have to guzzle wine if I had to have dinner with Terri too, Will’s mom...

“Oh it’s just hamburger casserole! Look out for bones.” Lucky for you she likes her casserole boneful!

Sign #8 That Mr Schuester Is An Asshole: Deciding to announce Terri’s pregnancy to his parents WELL before the 12 week standard, without asking her first. He literally springs it on her. Yeah she’s awful, but so is he right now!

“I started at Zuckerman and Zuckerman while I was in college” Alternate timeline where Lauren Zises and Puck start a business together confirmed?

Is it mean of me to be distracted by how HUGE Will’s dad’s ears are...?

Theme of the day: Placating William Schuester’s ego

Quinn calling Rachel “sweetie” even though it’s dripping with sarcasm just makes my Faberry bones jingle

The way Quinn says “Did you ever perform Mr Schuester?” is a god damn SMACK! DOWN! 

Emma roasting John Stamos, who will be her husband in about a season’s time, is golden

Will spends too much time in Emma’s office. Aren’t the students meant to have appointments? There’s no way there’s a single school in the world where the counselling service isn’t totally overwhelmed with a mile long waiting list

The “For he’s a jolly good fellow” scene is me and my sister every time we hang out

Will turning into the camera to kick off “THIS IS HOW WE DO IT” is one of the better transitions on this show, honestly

This is one of the few occasions I actually like Matt Morrison’s delivery a lot. He genuinely sounds like he has no idea how awkward this group would be to watch...

Ahh... Nothing squicks me out quite like the face of William Schuester when he knows he’s about to get some coochie

Sign #9 That Mr Schuester Is An Asshole: Rachel and Quinn tell him his dance moves are old fashioned, and he starts being completely absent in rehearsals... Very professional of you William

The way he says “whatever” to Rachel makes me want to throw him into a bonfire

“Do you see anybody else in here with a plate of ‘I’m sorry’ cookies? BOOM! Smack DOWN!

Again, Finn just straight up not knowing what anything is is making my god damn day

Of COURSE she’s still upset Finn, you bozo! YOU PULLED A KISS-NUT-RUN!

How Many Times Can We Fit The Word Guts Into One Episode Challenge

Quinn and Santana are filling Sue in, but Brittany’s missing. I like to think she’s lost.

Wow for a while I forgot Santana and Puck were ever a thing... Can I re-forget it?

How can Mercedes look at Kurt in THAT jacket and think “yeah, that’s a heterosexual right there” I just. I can’t

Mercedes: Have you ever kissed anybody? Kurt: Yes. If by someone you mean the tender crook of my eLbOw... I’ve never wanted to be an elbow before wow!

Kurt and Mercedes reminding one another that they’re the best people within a 100 mile radius? Perfect.

“Every moment of your life is an opportunity for fashion” is a GREAT philosophy until you’re me and have about as much style as a dumpster raccoon

POISON! I hate that I actually like this cover...

You ready Ken? I’m ready. You ready Oooooonrie? I’m ready Will, are you?  Like, just pull the plug RIB

I can’t complain about how supportive Will’s parents are tbh it’s kinda wholesome?

Why was Figgins at this random acapella show...? Nice of him to show up anyway

“Is it too late to call Will Schuester the next Micheal Buble?” YES. Don’t sully the name of Mr Christmas himself

Oh wow. They really dragged Josh Groban into this! I nearly forgot...

MERCEDES LOOKS CUTE AS HELL IN THOSE SUSPENDERS!!! AND TINA’S WEARING THE MOST BEAUTIFUL SHIRT??? GIRLS!!!

Ah, the form-fitting sweaters that stop at the knee... Where would we be without them? Well, idk, if Burt Hummel was in charge apparently we’d all have nice cars

Kurt bb you have no idea you’re being asked out do you??? Bless your heart. Also poor Mercedes, she thinks he said yes...

I’m sorry, but NO car wash is going to raise you $8000. I don’t care if you’re washing those cars with caviar, it’s just not gonna happen!

Sign #10 That Mr Schuester Is An Asshole: Henri ends up in the ER because he’s been chugging cough syrup like it’s Redbull and all he cares about is not being able to twerk for Josh Groban :/

Imagine seeing an ad for the Acafellas on fucking craigslist. Sign up now, feet pics optional!

Sign #11 That Mr Schuester Is An Asshole: Belittles Finn for wanting to quit glee, while completely ignoring and neglecting glee.

Imagine your high school Spanish teacher holding you back after class to ask you to join his acapella band ._.

Puck join glee for MILFs and ONLY for MILFs. That’s all he wanted

Santana told Puck she ended it over his credit score but really it was all the heterosexuality

Oh god for a second I thought the first cougar was Santana’s mother I nearly flipped

“I also stopped beating people up so much” is ICONIC

Hey Ken! Maybe stop grabbing your student like that? Thanks! fuckhead

“My BOWELS have better moves than you” God damn it. I want to hate Puck, and I think we all know why, but... I love this character. 

ThAt BaSeBaLl ThInG sUrE wAs GoOd Mr ScHuE!

I know this isn’t the point of this scene, but I NEED to see Kurt just walking around school in a corset. Just chilling in his lessons like that? Icon.

Mercedes asking Kurt to be her boyfriend is PAINFUL but also I fucking love her confidence? She knows what she wants! It’s just a shame she vandalises his car right after :/ 

Kurt’s FACE when Mercedes says “Rachel?!” He can’t believe he lucked out like that oh my goodness

SHE SMASHED THE WINDOW. HIS FACE OH MY GOD. Why are all the half-naked Cheerios polishing the busted car now 

Amber busts some MOVES for this number... She kills it. I mean, don’t smash cars up kids, but if you do make sure you know your choreography for after!

It must’ve been so much fun to smash up that car for the dance oh my goodness. Did they have to shoot that in one take? Or did they just have a line of Navigators out back? RIB will never wear form-fitting sweaters that stop at the knee ever again...

“Well you busted my heart!” Ok Mercedes but like... He didn’t put a fucking ROCK through it he just doesn’t know what dates are???

Mercedes sticks up for Artie, and then Kurt sticks up for them both when Dakota Stanley starts being a bitch... They’re wonderful friends! So proud of them

Ok he’s a little gremlin man but “I feel like a WOODLAND CREATURE!” is still something I quote

I know Rachel’s nose is a recurring thing but... It’s not a bad nose? Like, at all? It suits her perfectly, and it’s not noticeably large?

Will you really don’t need to be that close to fix Finn’s tie. In fact, you don’t need to fix it at all?

I know you’re not gonna sing THAT song!

They did NOT pay Josh Groban enough for any of this. Especially not “Josh Groban loves a blousy alcoholic”

“I’m a teacher... And a really good one” Are you, Mr Schue? Are you?

The look on Kurt’s face when he comes out to Mercedes... You can see the panic there. His eyes. Oh god. And then she ACCEPTS HIM because HE’S WONDERFUL THE WAY HE IS and she’s a GOOD FRIEND!!! Oh god he’s tearing up I’m going to cry...

Although I’m not 100% in love with the way she implies that telling everybody in the glee club is as simple as being true to himself. He’s not ashamed, Mercedes, he’s terrified... Although I know her heart is in the right place. She just wants him to know they’ll accept him at the end of the day!

He’s crying... My baby boy...

Sue permanently has old Cheerios footage playing on the TV in her office, because of course she does!

Quinn can say Sue taught her that lesson, but we all know she learned it from Rachel. With whom she is in love, of course.

Ahh, the first real Faberry moment... Delicious. Finally, some good fucking food!

[whatmakesmebleed]

tagged by the lovely @coffeexwhiskey thanks. This was fun.

1. Zodiac Sign: Virgo through and through. I used to deny it but no yeah I’m a total Virgo and proud of it.

2. Last thing I googled: well I google everything. To the point other people know I will and ask me to google stuff. Apparently it’s a Virgo thing too but the last thing I remember for sure. I was writing a board for work about Illnesses you can’t work with and was making sure I spelled Jaundice right.

3. Song stuck in my head: that damn Lizzo one. I just walk around telling people they could have had a bad bitch.

4. Favorite musicians: I kind of prefer songs over musicians but I do miss living in SoCal and going to see my fav singer songwriters all the time. I’ve seen Tyler Hilton and Tyrone Wells like 16 times each. Sometimes twice in one day. They aren’t as easy to see living in Central Oregon but I do what I can. I also love musicals. 90’s rap and 2000’s pop. Emo and rock were my 20’s faze. I will just listen to anything and everything.

5. Do you get asks: I used to back in my first round of tumblr posting about 6 or 7 years ago. Not so much now but I’m open to them.

6. Amount of 💤: if I’m being good and go to bed at 7:30 a good 8 hours but that never happens. I work at 4:30 in the morning 5 days a week so usually a good 5 to 6 will keep me sane.

7. Lucky number: 12. Don’t know why just have always liked it.

8. What are you wearing: a Star Wars Princess Leia sweatshirt and some black and grey star patterned leggings filled with holes from my dogs jumping on me. Also currently have a dog on my lap since I just got home from work and he’s excited.

9. Dream trip: I got to experience part of it last year finally going to Ireland. I very much want to live there. Next up I want to go to Scotland. France. Spain. Switzerland. And back to Ireland and Italy. Cities I really want to explore. London. Bristol(thank you Skins for this one) Paris. Venice. I get my bachelors next spring and I’m hopefully planning a trip for September.

10. Instruments you play: none. I mean I can play some stuff on the piano self taught and I can sing and dance. I had an awful music teacher as a child and it kind of scarred me from instruments but I still would love to learn the drums one day.

11. Languages you speak: English. I have leaned both Spanish and Italian but I understand it better than I can speak it. I need to hear more cause I’d love to be better at speaking it as I am both. Would also love to learn French one day.

12. Favorite song: oh man. I know it’s cheesy but Hallelujah any and every version. I also have a soft spot for Hometown Glory by Adele and Call your Girlfriend by Robyn.

13. Random fact: I own my house. Bought it on my own with stock from working at Starbucks for 17 years. Ironically my dream has always been to living in an apartment in a big city. There’s still time.

14. Cats or dogs: I’m an equal opportunist. I have 3 cats. Loki. Vader. Calypso. And two dogs. Rogue and Zeppelin. I guess it I had to pick I’m a cat person but my pups are my babes. I just like animals.

15. Aesthetic: I’m a bit of a mixed bag. I suffer from anxiety and depression so I can get super dark. But I love sunsets and sunrises and dancing like a fool. I lean to introvert but I love hanging out with friends and make them easily. I just suck at keeping up with them. I love love and yet have no desire to seek it. I’m all over the place but it’s me.

16. 🎶playlist on shuffle: gonna go ahead and shuffle my most played playlist on Spotify.

Chandelier- Sia. My goal is to one day work up the courage to do this one for karaoke. I love Sia though. When I lived in Long Beach my boss made me take a long break to listen to the radio and tell her who sang the song. It was Sia.

Hello-Adele. I refused to listen to this song when it came out. I just wasn’t in that head space for sad Adele. I heard it for the first time driving to work at 4 in the morning. Clearly I liked it.

Powerful-Major Lazer, Ellie Goulding. I’m a big fan of male/female singers collaborating. “There’s an energy when you hold me”. I just dig the lyrics.

Work It- Missy Elliot. I will literally stop what I’m doing and dance to this song when it comes on. If I’m at a club and we were talking I would be gone mid-sentence to the dance floor. This is my song!

Girls Chase Boys-Ingrid Michealson. It’s just catchy and fun to sing. I like it.

Home- Edward Sharpe and the Magnetics. If I was in a band this is the vibe I would want. Singing with a male vocalist and just vibing. I do hate the talking part though.

Butterfly-Crazytown. Ok this song is terrible but in that horribly good way. It reminds me of high school. Yeah. I’m a little old. But it’s so silly and I know all the words and I love just singing it loudly.

Stolen Dance- Milky Chance. I honestly haven’t listened to this in a long time. It was fun when it came out but then it was everywhere.

2 Heads-Coleman Hell. This song actually kind of makes me sad. It reminds me of my old roommates and inside jokes. We don’t really talk anymore. But that’s the joy of music. It can take you to happy and sad times. And though I get sad the times were happy.

When I was your Man- Bruno Mars. I never listen to this song and I have no idea how it got on my favorites yet I keep it there and skip over it.

So a bonus number 11.

Hometown Glory-Adele. I first heard this on Skins when Cassie runs through NYC. RIP Chris Miles. I loved it and even had it as a ringtone on my chocolat phone. People were like who is that. And look at Adele now.

tagging @qwillow @gendryadempsie @thereluctantbadger @valsore and pretty much anyone who wants go do it. Sorry if you’ve already been tagged.

[penzyroamin]

OH PENZY I THINK THAT ANY WAY YOU CHOOSE TO HANDLE THE "HASTA LA VISTA, JACKASS" PROMPT I WILL LAUGH TILL I CRY SO PLS THAT ONE!!! w javid or newsbians, take your pick

ELLA!!!!!!!!!!!!! OK SO THIS IS SUCH AN OLD PROMPT BUT. IT IS FINALLY DONE AND IT IS SO MUCH LONGER THAN I EXPECTED AND YKNOW WHAT. JUST TAKE IT. HERE IT IS. also it has southern davey because i’ve been a lil homesick recently and decided to Project, Babey!

(javid, modern au)

“You don’t know what you do to me,” Davey says quietly, and he’s holding back tears so obviously that Jack doesn’t think he’s really holding them back at all.

He holds up the box in front of Jack’s face. “What the fuck? What the FUCK!”

“In my defense–” Jack starts, and Davey waves the box so wildly Jack worries he’ll get hit with it.

“What defense! Tell me what this is, to my goddamn face!”

“Tuna casserole,” Jack says weakly, and Davey chucks the box into the sink.

“Who the goddamn fuck do you think you are?”

“You always told me casseroles–”

“That,” Davey seethes, “is a fuckin’ disgrace. You hand over a casserole without fucking fish in it, in a nice casserole pan that you’re okay with never gettin’ back.”

“You never told me the fish part!” Jack says, and Davey presses his palms to his eyes as he starts shaking with laughter.

“What the fuck,” he says, and Jack really has no fucking idea what’s happening.

“Dave?”

Almost seamlessly, his laughter turns to sniffing, and Davey pulls his hands away from his eyes, looks at Jack for less than a second, and sobs.

“Oh, Jesus. Son of a– fuck. Fuck,” Jack mutters, taking a tiny step forward before Davey collapses right into him, making him stagger backwards as he grabs handfuls of Davey’s flannel.

“It’s okay,” he mutters, and Davey gasps against his shoulder. “It’s okay, Dave, you’ll be alright. I’m right here.”

It’s like some kind of gross fucking prank, the way everything turns. The way that Jack can text Davey in the morning about Isaac, who was two minutes late to the Modern Spanish Prose lecture Davey had at eight in the morning, (but Davey had been far too sleep-deprived to consider that before proceeding to spend the day and then hook up with him without ever getting his number,) and then who had vanished from Davey’s life, and that an hour after that conversation, Davey’s aunt is dead.

And then a day after that, Jack is in Georgia, and Davey’s crumbled against him, sobbing.

“Jack,” Davey murmurs quietly, like it’s a kind of prayer. “Jack, Jack, Jack, Jack… Jack.”

“Davey?” Jack says, and he feels Davey clutch at his back, his breathing ragged and harsh as he tries to rein himself in, his sniffs slowing down but then speeding back up, like it’s occurring to him all over again.

Jack doesn’t know how long it takes for him to get Davey over to the couch, curled into a tight little ball and slowing his breath with that one app on his phone while Jack sticks large squares of brownie on top of ice cream to carry it over to him.

Davey sticks his hands a few inches past the barrier of the blanket he’s wrapped himself up in so he can take the bowl gratefully, sticking his spoon into it like he’s digging up treasure.

Jack sits down next to him and Davey holds up one corner of his blanket so Jack can share it.

It’s still a little weird, if Jack’s being honest. There’s no guidelines, no rules for what they are when there isn’t hundreds of miles in between them.

Are they close, like their words say? The way Davey sends him a good morning and a good night every day, the way Jack knows that when he says he loves him right before he passes out, he’s going to wake up with a notification from last night saying that Davey loves him, too?

Or are words just words? Jack doesn’t know. He doesn’t think so, he thinks there’s more than just words that can tell him that Davey really does care about him.

Or maybe he’s just too sad and too in love for his own good.

Because that’s another thing, there, the fact that there’s hundreds of miles between them, usually, and when there is, Jack’s able to hold himself back from falling off the brink. Of course it’s there in the way he smiles too hard when Davey sends him something funny, and in the way he animates everything he knows of Davey in his head, the video chats and the selfies and everything, into something almost corporeal. The way he sometimes rolls over when he can’t sleep and almost thinks he can see Davey right next to him, smiling faintly and breathing just soft enough for it to not reach Jack’s face.

(And he blinks and then it isn’t real, of course, because Davey’s in Georgia and Jack’s in New York and that’s too far away for Davey to be laying right there, next to Jack.)

But there’s something entirely different about Davey actually being there.

They turn the TV on, and Jack studies Davey.

Jack sees his freckles up close for the first time, thick across his cheekbones from the sun but also scattered all over his arms and legs. He finally pins down how Davey smells, out of the options he’d made up in his mind when he didn’t have proof, and he thinks that the faint sort of vanilla-coconut from the cheap soap he saw in the bathroom is so, so much better than he thought it’d be.

Easily, though, the most startling thing is how warm Davey is.

It’s cruel, almost, because it’d be so much more useful up in Manhattan, but it’s still nighttime, and Jack’s as cold as ice no matter what, so he slowly reaches his foot towards Davey’s leg, just to steal a little bit of his warmth.

Immediately, Davey yelps, yanking his leg away. “Evil man!” he says, and his voice is still hoarse with tears, but it’s better. “I was already fixin’ to murder you, but now I’m gonna do it for real!” Jack decides to ignore just how much he loves that sentence, the way Davey’s twenty-one years worth of life in Georgia still shows clear as day through his voice no matter how much every socialite English teacher tried to beat it out of him.

The Jacobs family must make a picture, he thinks, what with the combo of the slang left over from a million different languages, David and his siblings with their “Southern charm” or however Sarah wants to put it, Esther and Mayer with their Eastern European accents and sensibilities, and family from everywhere in between.

But still, there’s a conversation going on, and Jack has to respond.

Jack groans. “You and your space heater self’ve been holdin’ out on me for three years, and now that I’m here you’re gonna hold out on me some more?”

“You’ve got the blanket, don’t you?”

“Yeah, ha, ha. Hasta la vista, jackass.”

Davey rolls his eyes, but he’s smiling, and Jack practically feels the world light up. He keeps his eyes trained forward, towards the TV, as Davey tucks himself in closer to him.

“I’m sorry I yelled at your casserole,” Davey says.

Jack coughs out a laugh. “It’s fine. It was a terrible casserole, anyways.”

“It was a sweet thought, though.” Davey turns his head to smile at him, soft and warm, before he turns back to the TV.

It’s comforting, which is weird for Jack to think because he’s really not the one who needs comfort, here.

“Thank you for coming,” Davey says quietly, his cheek pressed against Jack’s shoulder.

Jack turns his head, just enough so he can see him out of his peripheral. “Course I came.”

“I mean… Kind of a doozy for the first time we really get to see each other, y’know?”

Jack knows that they’ve both been thinking it, that in the three years since Sarah introduced them in a group chat and then promptly left it, they didn’t exactly think that the first time one of them would make it to the other would be because of something like this.

Still, that doesn’t stop his from turning fully so that he can rub Davey’s shoulder in what he hopes is some sort of comforting way. “Are you better than you would be because I’m here?”

Davey frowns, his eyebrows furrowing. “Of course.”

“Then it was worth it,” Jack says simply, and Davey smiles, surprised. It’s the prettiest thing Jack’s ever seen, just the shocked little grin he makes and the way his eyes light up, and god, if Jack doesn’t want to see it every day of his life.

“And hey,” he continues, hoping to keep the grin up a little longer, “once I save up some more, I’ll come back down and we’ll do it all proper.”

Davey laughs, taking the hand on his shoulder to hold it tightly. “I’ll even buy you flowers. Magnolias,” he teases, and Jack can’t help the way he nearly melts like butter into his hands.

“I’d like that,” he says, and he doesn’t even register that his tone was anything other than normal until Davey leans forward and kisses him.

Jack knew, getting off that plane, that he couldn’t kiss Davey. There were a million reasons about him grieving, and about how there was no way he could manage long distance and college at the same time, and reasons, reasons, reasons.

But on the other hand, he was weak, so how on Earth was he supposed to listen to his reasons when he was busy getting exactly what he wanted?

And so there his brain went, debating between how everything could feel right and wrong at the exact same time.

Eventually, despite everything in him saying yes yes yes this is right and he’s right here for the first time, Jack pulled away, pushing Davey back with the hand he already had against his chest.

“Dave, no.”

Davey’s face immediately drops, and Jack knows that fear like he knows the crescent-shaped dents in his palms and the dull ache in his stomach, because he feels that fear every single time he not-joking-joke-flirts with Davey and he doesn’t get a message back for a few minutes.

“Fuck, I’m sorry, if I read this wrong or you don’t want this or–” he cuts off when Jack interrupts him.

“Davey, you’ve gotta know I do, but–”

Davey groans, exasperated, and it really, truly should not be as attractive as it is. “Then c’mon, what’s the problem?”

“Davey, your aunt just died.”

Davey flinches visibly at that, but he covers it up in an instant. “And?”

“I’m not trying to cross any kinda line, but she was the first person you ever came out to.”

Another flinch, but still, “And? I’ve come out to plenty of folks, Jack.”

“I just…” Jack exhales slowly, trying to put together the case he’d made in his head. Jack’s Mind v The Commonwealth of Jack’s Heart, 2019. “When Miss Hannah got sick, I freaked out. Like I thought her maybe not making it would take away me being bi. And I kinda rushed to do everything I could to remind myself I was, y’know?” He took a deep breath. “I want this. You know I do. But I don’t want this if you just want something. It’s gotta be you wanting this, too.”

He finally manages to make eye contact, and finds Davey just staring back.

It’s been weeks, but Jack still isn’t used to the humidity.

Spot had laughed at him over the phone, but Jack stuck to his guns: the South fucking sucks.

The natural next question had been an incredibly cordial why the hell’re you there, huh? that Jack had found himself scrambling to answer.

The obvious answer was work: Jack had been looking for years for a real opportunity to get a gallery started, and Atlanta had basically handed him the perfect situation.

There was the less obvious answer, too, the mildly more humiliating one, but he doesn’t dwell on that one.

Except for right now, of course. He’s definitely dwelling.

Jack: it was good chatting with you again!

Davey: you, too :) sleep well

That was seven months ago. Two years of silence, three hundred and seventy-five messages worth of catching up in one evening, and then another seven months of radio silence.

Jack had spent years hundreds of miles away from Davey, wishing that he was closer to him. Now, he’s fifteen miles away, and he’s too scared to send him a text.

It takes another twenty minutes of him hesitating before finally he holds his breath and does it.

Jack: hey

Davey: who is this?

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fucking shit, fuckity fuck fuck fuck–

Davey: JOKING.

Davey: hi, jack :)

[lumikinetic]

*flops down on sofa*

*exhales*

Tumblr gives me a lot of wild shit every now and again. Sometimes it's good, sometimes it's bad, sometimes it's hilarious, sometimes it's disheartening. And then yesterday came along and gave me the one-two punch of:

Captain Marvel being dolled up by the Russos instead of a jacket, S.H.I.E.L.D baseball cap and a Nine Inch Nails shirt, which is how she should be (not gonna talk about this, just want it out there that I'm pissed about it)

One Day At A Time being cancelled

ODAAT I'm gonna kind of touch on because it's not really what I want to talk about, but it did help me finalize the words for what I do, and that's capitalism in entertainment.

The most annoying goddamn trend in filmmaking (and of course in TV and Netflix/Prime originals) is companies caring more about their bottom line and less about making good content, and yeah I know this dead horse isn't just beaten, it's thrown into an active supervolcano but it really pisses me off and it's why I hate the new Star Wars stuff (well OK hate is a bit strong but they're uh Not Good) but I'll get to that. What corpos can't seem to get into their bloated skulls is that one cannot exist without the other. You need to put out good, quality content with value so that fans like it so they give you money so they increase your profits so you can make more content and so on. But somewhere down the line some fuckhead went "what if we just pushed out what we have?" and just kinda expected us to not take notice.

Now before the comments section gets all hot and bothered because I know some people on this site don't have the gift of reading comprehension, I know profits are important, I'm saying when companies shun good filmmaking for more money, they get lazy and all they can think about is profit and not how they make that profit, they don't care at all about using that money to make more good, valuable content.

One Day At A Time

I've never watched One Day At A Time but the fact Netflix just outright cancelled it knowing damn well what it meant to the people the characters are representing is just disgusting. And they have the fucking audacity to blame it on the viewership? I've seen hundreds of artworks, gifs and a video clip here and there of this show. I've seen precisely one (1) meme of 13 Reasons Why and that is literally it. I'm not following the tags for either. Plus, #saveODAAT has, last I checked, 350k tweets on trending or thereabouts?

So obviously the viewership isn't the problem, it's the racism and homophobia of cancelling a Spanish (? - again, never seen it), LGBT+ focused show that a lot of people quite happily and positively connect with when a crap show about suicide and Friends gets to stay on. It's just ugh. Cancelling a show like this then paying something like $100mil to keep Friends. I was going to expand on the shitty capitalism here but tbh that's it, Netflix are making bad decisions and like I say, I'm only going to touch on it because it's not the main part.

Star Wars

Go watch the original trilogy and it's clear George Lucas was trying to create and do. He was trying to make art. The key difference between that and modern SW to me is BB8. Look at C3PO and R2D2 and already you can see they belong. C3PO is a translator droid and I'm not sure what exactly R2's job description is but it's obvious he does some kind of pilot assistance for X-Wing fighters. I never understood people who said R2 never did anything, because they obviously haven't seen Star Wars. You get that this is an R2 unit, right? Like, there's more than one out there and they have a job they were specifically built to do, it's just this one particular R2 unit who had to carry the message? Anyway, I'm derailing. R2 and C3PO have functions and they're clearly not new, they've been used for a long time. Then you look at BB8 and instantly it's like "this is a toy. This so called character was designed to sell toys". And then he was. He's a toy, he's on bags, notebooks, pens, clothes, everywhere. Disney is less concerned about making a Star Wars movie and more about making money off of the Star Wars name.

Into The Spider-Verse VS YA Movies

YA movies tend to suck because they were adapted from books and we all know how that pans out but the reason I'm using YA books specifically is because my mind jumped to The Hunger Games. I couldn't tell you a single fucking thing that happens in those movies. They're so dull and dead and forgettable and the characters are borderline unlikeable but you know which one I do like? Catching Fire, for one reason and one reason only: Jena Malone as Joanna Mason. Save for Haymitch, she's the only character I liked because those two are the only characters with any kind of charisma or life to them. They made an at most halfway decent attempt overall at recreating some otherwise really great books and they made a big show out of it, hiring some pretty well known names. And I'm not disparaging their performances, it was just what I call, ever since Suicide Squad came out, the Harley Quinn effect, in which good actors get given a good character and perform them really well and, through no fault of their own, fuck it up because the character was written poorly and no matter how well they act, if the script doesn't change, the performance will always be shit. The same for Divergent. And Percy Jackson. And Fault In Our Stars.

Then outside all of that you have Perks Of Being A Wallflower which is just a great, heartwarming movie because the characters feel like people and the brightness isn't turned way the fuck down in post and you actually want to be invested, and they're not afraid to have a colour palette beyond a splash of pink here and blue there and red there. Plus, Ant-Man as an English teacher. THEN you go watch Spider-Verse and oh hey. I can actually see the movie now. And I mean see it. They do not slack off when it comes to visuals. Even by animation's standards, everyone is so expressive and alive and... animated. Sorry, I couldn't get a better word but they are! When you look at Miles in comparison to Katniss in terms of writing and performance, the difference is just startling. The only times I can think of where Katniss shows any kind of emotion in the first movie is when she slams the knife in the table and Rue's funeral and I had to think about that. Without thinking for Miles, already I've got "who's Morales?", the scene where Uncle Aaron teaches him the shoulder touch, the scene where Miles spray paints in the subway, that scene in the alley, the moment in Olivia's office when he just freezes after she says she can't wait to watch Peter in immense pain Like That and made all the wlws melt in their seats. You get the idea. So what's the point for this section? Well, as simply as I can put it, Hunger Games was made with money, for money. Spiderverse was made with love, for love. Spiderverse cared about people who read comic books and paid more than enough tribute to the art forms people think of as lesser for no goddamn reason other than elitism and proved for the thousandth time that it is something that can be used in filmmaking. They were trying to make art. Hunger Games and most other YA novel movie adaptations saw a preestablished fan base they could exploit for money. They were trying to make money.

Rambo

This was a weird one, yeah. Don't worry I was confused too when it popped into my head. I saw the original Rambo a while back and what I liked about it (and Apocalypse Now) is it wasn't a war film where the USA charge in and hooray everything's all right, this movie grabs your shirt and says "hey. Vietnam did something to these guys and they're not OK. Probably they'll never be OK". Then I watched the Rambo reboot that came out in like 2011 or something and I remember thinking "OK so now he's just this dude? Who lives in Thailand... And what, that's it?" There was no scene to show his psychological state today. Nothing to acknowledge his PTSD. They just thought "hey! Let's make Rambo but this time, just give him guns and and yelling and spray some blood!" The reason I kind of ended this train of thought quickly is because I realised that, let's be real, the main body of Rambo's audience just want to see Sly Stallone kill some fools. But yeah, the fact that they just ignored John's mental state in place of mega violence is such a glaringly obvious move to just appeal to violent teenage boys.

The Auteur

My favourite director is Wes Anderson and my favourite movie is The Grand Budapest Hotel (though Panos Cosmatos seems to be eyeing these titles with Beyond The Black Rainbow and Mandy, I haven't watched them yet). Quentin Tarantino, Spike Lee, Wes Anderson, auteurs always stand out even though their movies are all the same, and I think the reason they're so successful is because that specific style is so much better than most other mainstream cinema. I'm not saying that those other movies are bad, I love them and will watch them again and again but I'm saying Wes Anderson could make a short movie and it would be better than most Marvel movies put together (don't talk to me about Captain Marvel, I haven't seen it yet. Gonna see it this Sunday). No matter what you think of these directors, you can instantly tell the difference between these movies that they care about and the passion and hard work they put in and Disney pumping out their 400th reboot.

It Keeps Working

You guys wanna know the thought that keeps me up at night? Someday they're going to make a Fortnite movie. You guys wanna know why it keeps me up at night? Because it's going to be popular. Yeah, obviously not at the box office, because it'll be a videogame movie and those are worse than book movies, but it will be popular for no apparent reason. And what pisses me off is that Fortnite's popularity is only because of the battle royale mode, which has now essentially become synonymous with dying franchises and it just adds another layer to the lack of creative effort and the movie will just be Hunger Games with guns. Exactly the same as what I said at the start of this rant, there's a really noticeable shift from making content to jumping on whatever bandwagon is passing by because you know it'll make you money. Yeah, you have to spend money to make money but that doesn't mean you get complacent in what you spend your money on or if you spend money at all because when you cut corners, consumers can see that shit.

Anyway I'm done complaining thanks for having the willpower to pay attention to my dumb opinions.

[gretagerwigcollection]

Greta Gerwig: My Mother, My City By Greta Gerwig  Greta and Chris Gerwig in Washington Square Park. Photo Credit Kathy Lo for The New York Times. Jan. 4, 2018

The first New Yorker I ever knew was my mother, Chris Gerwig. I grew up in Sacramento, and that was the only place I’ve ever known her to call home. She had, in fact, lived in Brooklyn briefly as a child, but that was not what made her a New Yorker. She had and has the spirit of a quintessential New York City gal. She’s brash and smart and tough and funny, and was always the mother my school dreaded a call from because she would push and push and push until she got what she wanted. I was the only kid who was allowed to take both band and Spanish because of her insistence. She has more go-get-’em energy than almost anyone I’ve ever met.

I was too young to remember New York City the first time I visited from Sacramento. My dad was there on business, and there are pictures of me at 2 years old toddling around Central Park, sitting on the statue of Balto the Alaskan sled dog hero and having “tea” with the “Alice in Wonderland” characters. In the photographs, my mom is right there beside me, looking like I do now, with her big (slightly gummy) smile and lanky arms and a desire to walk until she can’t walk anymore.

At 5, I visited a second time. We were staying with family friends who taught at Columbia. It was summer but also somehow gray. As a Californian I had never known a gray summer. It was the late 1980s, so New York still had something seedy and dangerous about it. There was a story of the professor’s wife walking into a drug deal going down in the hallway of their apartment building and how she street-smarted her way out of getting hurt. I didn’t understand drugs or mugging, but I did remember an anxiety that was indistinguishable from excitement. It felt a universe away from the kids-on-bikes town that was Sacramento. It seemed impossible that it was the same country. And yet somehow, it also felt like home.

Sacramento is a place where you can always see the horizon. It is flat and beautiful and open. But I loved the crowdedness of New York City, how when it rained it seemed like the buildings were raining, not the sky. My mom held my hand tight as she walk-sprinted through the city. She was in her element here; everyone was moving as quickly as she was. She was joyfully sweaty. So was I. The Gerwig women belonged in New York.

The only thing standing out from the concrete and asphalt were the neon lights advertising kicks of different stripes. Musicals, alcohol, women. (I had just learned to read, and the concept of “Live Nude Girls” was extremely interesting.) When we waited for hours to get rush tickets for Broadway shows, Mom befriended people in line, just as she makes friends everywhere (the grocery store, the D.M.V., the library). They became very invested in the little blond girl getting in to see the show. And I did: “42nd Street” with Jerry Orbach. “Gypsy” with Tyne Daly. “Cats” with cats. At night, back at the apartment, everyone would play music — my dad on trumpet; his friend, the piano; his friend’s wife, the tuba. Someone taught me how to play spoons. My mom would clap along, saying, “Your dad is the one with the talent” although she had talents that were less performative but no less impressive.

There were children in New York, of course, but they seemed confined to the playgrounds. “It’s a great place to have a family” is a true thing that is often said about Sacramento. To be a kid in Sacramento then was to be in the right place at the right time. Nearly everyone had a backyard; some people had pools and even their own personal jungle gyms; you could choose which kids were invited to slide and swim and swing. My mom did not believe in having your own play set. She thought it defeated the point of a playground, which was to make new friends and get comfortable with people who weren’t your family. In Sacramento, she would walk me down to McKinley Park. It was a couple of miles away, but it had the best playground. I was walking that distance with her by the time I was 4.

Later, when I told a boyfriend about the walk, he didn’t believe me: “That’s just a story your parents tell you.” He thought it was an exaggeration. But I am certain of its truth. My mother had raised me to be a walker, to be on the move. Two miles to the playground at 4 years old was real. My mom wasn’t my playmate, but she was the person who brought me out into the world and taught me that it was not scary. In New York, no one, not even the very wealthy, had their own private paradise; it had to be shared. City kids were good at playing, everyone was a stranger and everyone belonged. She had prepared me well.

But New York, ultimately, seemed to be a city of grown-ups. It was the adult world and I was a guest there. It was always past my bedtime, and all the normal rules were suspended. Once, my mom and I were in a cab (maybe we were late to something? My mom would never just “take a cab”) and I told her that the next day I wanted to wear my rock ’n’ roll outfit. It was a pink skirt and top with white guitars all over them. The cabby overheard and met my eye in the rearview mirror. He winked and said in a thick New York accent, “I’ll wait for you, doll.” Maybe now I’d think it was creepy; maybe my mom did think it was creepy; but at the time it was thrilling. New York was the place to be a grown-up, and I had to figure out how to get back.

At home in Sacramento, my mom took me to Tower Records to order the double cassette tapes of the original cast recordings of the musicals I had seen. She found me the best tap-dancing teachers in town to support my newfound love, and when I also expressed interest in hula dancing, she found the sole Polynesian dance group in Sacramento and signed me up. We had left New York, but she was still bringing as much of it as she could to me, with just as much bravado and hustle as the city itself.

When I finally made it back to New York to attend Barnard College, I was 19 and felt “Ah, yes, now life can really begin,” as if life hadn’t been going on before. Against explicit warnings not to, I climbed to the roof of my dorm to look down at the city below. It was my city, or I wanted it to be. But I had no idea which way was uptown and which was downtown. This place I had wanted so badly to be part of was still a mystery.

So I did the only thing that made sense to me. I got on the subway and rode it as far away as I could, deliberately getting lost to learn it. I spent the next several hours trying to find my way back without a map. Walking the streets and puzzling out how West Fourth Street could be right next to West 12th, I realized that I was doing alone what my mom had done with me years before. Walking, walking, walking, learning the city by foot, every inch. She was the reason I believed this was the proper way to introduce myself to the city. And the city felt like my mother. New York City felt like home because it felt like her.

A version of this article appears in print on Jan. 7, 2018, on Page AR16 of the New York edition with the headline: Greta Gerwig: My Mother, My New York.

[formerly-rosaline]

About Axe

Full name: Axelle Rose Nelson (named after Axl Rose of Guns n Roses)

Date of birth: November 28, 1989

Place of birth: NYC

Hometown: Jericho, NY, a suburb of NYC

Signs: Sagittarius (fire), Earth Snake, Owl

Parents: Estrella Mariam Nelson (born 1972, died 2001, née García) and Leonard Earl Nelson (born 1971)

Siblings: Kailene Renae Nelson (born 1993) and Kalise Rae Nelson (born 1998)

Ethnicity: Spanish, English, Welsh, Indigenous American

Height: 5'7

Species: vampire and human from her father's side, werewolf from her mother's

Personality: Axe has a dark side. It's hard to peel back her layers and get passed it. Manipulative and a liar to boot. Some would call her evil. Loyal to a fault to those who have earned her trust - which is a slow, arduous process. Axe tends to trust the wrong people though, and has fallen into plenty of abusive relationships - platonic and otherwise. She herself is very toxic and conniving. Macabre sense of humor. Kinky. Loves to dance.

Backstory: Axe grew up relatively normally, the oldest of three daughters. Her parents were loving enough to each other and the girls, although her father was emotionally abusive to all four of them and physically abusive occasionally to their mother. He blamed it on being in a house full of women and having nowhere to escape to, but really it was the alcoholism combined with generally being a jackass. If asked, Axe would insist it didn't shape who she was at all.

A couple months before Axe's 12th birthday, a tragedy that shook America hit particularly close to home for the Nelson family. Estrella was a custodian in the Twin Towers. At 9:03 am, They were supposed to be watching a DARE video in health class, but instead, Axe watched live as the South Tower was hit, killing her mother though she didn't know it at the time. There was stunned silence from the 8th grade class - Axe was bright, and had tested out of 6th grade - of Jericho Middle School, and the teacher promptly shut off the TV.

Axe had no idea this moment would change not just her family's lives, but the lives of all Americans. School was let out at about 11 am that day, and Axe walked home. Her father had picked up Kailene from elementary school, and Kalise was only a toddler at the time. They couldn't possibly understand what was happening - or what it meant. Mom is gone. Axe couldn't break it to them though, as her father kept attempting frantically to make phone calls. All lines were jammed.

They were huddled in the living room of a neighbor's home, the neighbors praying and crying, and Kalise began to fuss as well. Dissociating, Axe held the child and tried to soothe her. That was the day it all changed forever. That was the day Axe took on a role she shouldn't have ever had to, the day the alcoholism spiraled, the day that destroyed the Nelson family's already cracking foundation. She couldn't hear the news over the sounds of bodies thudding live in the background.

Since that loss, Axe turned to unhealthy coping mechanisms. She was never really one to overindulge in drugs and alcohol, though she did partake; instead, she let bloodlust consume her. She manipulated plenty a man into feeding the monster that consumed her... the monster she had become. Axe raised her sisters, as her father continually let them down, though he never did raise a hand to them outside of spanking.

When she was 17, Axe was ready to move on. She applied for the Biomedical Engineering program at Johns Hopkins in Baltimore, and she got in. Kailene was just starting high school, and Kalise was doing well in elementary. It was time for her to move on. Besides, Baltimore was less than 200 miles away. Tinged with guilt, Axe still took the chance to improve her life. She couldn't play mommy forever.

No child should be forced to go through what Axelle did; no child should have to raise their siblings, however common it is. Axelle never got the chance to be a teenager. She never even partied until Johns Hopkins. Unfortunately, she spent so much time finally getting to be a teen that she failed two classes her first semester and lost her scholarships. Axe decided to continue moving on with her life, though.

Without telling her father, Axe moved to Detroit and worked three jobs until she had enough for an online semester at Wayne State University as a biology student. Living paycheck to paycheck, Axe put herself through a year of college there before she was able to apply for financial aid once again. When she did, her father found out where she was. She didn't let his anger shake her, though.

Eventually, she was able to quit two of her jobs and rack up a lot of student debt to attend in-person classes. She dreamed of being able to get back into Johns, but they rejected her every time she reapplied. Instead, she attended Wayne State's School of Medicine. By the end of her college career and residency, she was in over 300,000 dollars of student debt. She also developed alcoholism during her stint in med school.

Graduating in 2019 with a Ph.D. in immunology and microbiology, Axe finally felt like she'd made something of herself. She refused to change her name for her degree, despite plenty telling her she should. Besides, now she was Dr. Nelson, and that sounded plenty professional to her. She returned to the Big Apple to find a job as an immunologist. Doctors had access to plenty of blood, after all.

Kailene had already graduated from the Fashion Institute of Technology with a Bachelor's in Accessories Design and Kalise was partying it up in her third year at LaGuardia Community College where she had changed her major from Social Science and Humanities to Business Administration. She had no idea what she wanted to do with her life, and who could blame her. She never knew their mother, and it had led to her being really stunted in life. Axe felt partially to blame; she had left when Kalise was so young, after all, and stayed gone for eleven years. Now that she was back, she wanted to spend time with her family - even their father. She had forgiven him a long time ago. Besides, he'd had to have done something right since all three of them had attended college.

Kinks: shibari, daddy doms, footplay, bloodplay, asphyxiation, breath play, choking, knifeplay, barebacking, CBT, exhibitionism, anal. Switch, primarily sub. Loves being yanked by the hair, slapped around, and generally manhandled. If it's BDSM, she'd definitely try it twice before deciding if she's into it or not.

Turn-offs: pet play, collaring, hard degradation, age play - regression, diapers, begging, CNC.

Sexuality: pansexual (open to threesomes/orgies), polyamorous

Relationship status: single and not looking for serious commitment; prefers fwb. You won't hear her dropping the L bomb any time soon.

Current age: nearing 30