#mike had never had a crush either

[gayofthefae]

Throwing something out there. I don't think Jonathan ever knew about Will without knowing about Mike too.

[avengersbtch]

You're Lucky Your Beautiful - Armando Aretas

Armando Aretas x Reader

Warnings: This fic does not follow to the film’s timeline.  I have altered the scenes!!

A/N Pre relationship flirting?? Or maybe pre- pre-relationship flirting lol idk but it’s cute, I think. I’m a sucker for pre relationship fics and the build up!!! 

Summary: Y/N pinged the location of Mike & Marcus’, leading to Armando meeting y/n for the first time and a roller coaster of emotions in one night.

Word Count: 3.4k

The hunt for Mike, Marcus and Armando was plastered on every news outlet known, you felt useless watching every news reporter talk down on Mike and Marcus as you were trying to look for them. Marcus felt more like father figures to you than your actual parents did so watching everyone jump at the opportunity to talk down on their reputation they built was crushing, you also knew for an absolute fact that everything they were saying was false and you would bet your life on that too. You had no feelings toward Armando, you neither liked nor hated him. Mike obviously felt deeply for his long-lost son, but you had never met him, so seeing him on the news didn’t really inflict any feelings. All you knew was that he was the key to the case and after Mike insisted he ID the suspect, Armando agreed reluctantly. 

You were snuggled on your cream cotton couch sitting on your laptop trying to track down or contact the boys without the Feds knowing. They had pulled you off their case, knowing how close you were and took most of your personal belongings or tapped the rest assuming Marcus might contact you. This laptop was your backup, backup laptop, so thankfully they didn’t find this one.

Just as you were going to call it a night, your laptop pinned an advancement on their case, a location. Of-course Mike had gone to Tabitha’s, probably not wanting to get you involved in whatever mess he’s in. You immediately jumped and ran to get dressed to be some sort of assistance, now you weren’t physically or skill-fully equipped for combat, you could admit that, however expertise excelled behind a computer, and everyone knew that. Either way you know they could at least use a safe place to stay and whatever else you could offer.

You slipped in black jeans and a long sleeve black fitted top with a hoodie, with the aim of staying as inconspicuous as possible. You quickly slipped into your sneakers as you jump into your car, following the reports of their location. You’d probably get fired for doing what you were about to do, especially given there is a high chance an actual criminal is tagging along to their adventures. That obviously being Armando, but you decided would deal with that later. 

Speeding down the highway, you could hear the sirens closing in and the gunshots becoming more consistent. As you neared the scene, you could see multiple cop cars, large four-wheeled drives, and vans at all different angles. This would be a nightmare for you to find them. You drove into an alleyway, noticing the traffic moving in the same direction and slowly parked behind a large dump bin. Exiting the car, you left the ignition running to assist in easier escape. As you walked out the alleyway, you peeked out of the corner of the wall seeing a large black van on fire. 

“Guess it wasn’t that hard to find them” you chuckled rolling your eyes at the current state of the vehicle they were using. You watched them jump out the moving van just as the van light and exploded right before your eyes. You count three. Meaning they were in fact accompanied by Armando. Great. You eyed the three of them, as they ran in your direction, you eyed the scene making sure there were no witnesses and no threats. When you deemed it safe, you stepped out of the alleyway in full vision. They all paused, Mike squinted as if recognising your figure and slowly stepped closer. 

“Y/n?!” He questioned in surprise, obviously not expecting to see a familiar face.

“Y/n? Mike what are you on about?” Marcus followed until he spotted you “Y/n!” He confirmed once he ID’d you. More for himself really. 

“let’s have a family reunion later, hurry up my car’s around there” you pointed in a hurry as you ran off expecting them to follow you. You couldn’t waste any time, you need to get the out of here before they were spotted again. You slip into the driver’s seat waiting for them to get in, taking longer than usual you turn to see Armando still outside of the car. 

“Dude, get in the car. We need to go” you hissed. Did he not understand the severity of the situation?

“How can we trust her?” Armando asked looking over my shoulder at Mike.

“Who else do you have right now? get in or I’m leaving. I really don’t care whether you live or die” I whisper yelled, pre-emptively interrupting their conversation.

“Armando, get in. We can trust her” Mike sighed. Armando’s eyes flicked over to you and back to Mike then back over to you until he decided to trust you and slipped in the back seat near Marcus. You rolled your eyes, setting your car into drive and shaking your head, as if you were begging for him to trust you. 

The drive back was silent, almost awkward giving you were aiding the escape of a fugitive. Deciding to break the long silence, you joked “So I see you guys decided to quit you day job and harbour a wanted fugitive”. 

“Ha ha y/n, just get us to yours please. We need to get to Dorn’s tomorrow morning. Armando is our only lead to ID the suspect, they’re going lengths to try and kill him” Marcus explained, and his eyes remained on the road watching for any unwanted noise. Your eyes flicked to Armando through the rear-view mirror. His eyes also trained on the road and his surroundings. You had to admit, he was extremely good looking, even with his bud light shirt and his burnt jeans, the only thing you could focus on was his shining eyes. God damn. You trained your eyes back to the road in front of you and kept driving almost smacking yourself for checking him out.

“How did you find us?” Armando asked in curiosity, though his face did not emote. If it wasn’t for the question, it was almost like he didn’t give a fuck. 

“Oh uh, I, I uhm I’ve been tracing the feeds on your location. Just about everyone is looking for you. Though they’ve been pretty late to finding you guys after the uh crash” you stuttered honestly shocked at his interest. Not sure whether he’s asking you because he wants to know or testing you. 

“Armando, y/n’s the brains behind the operation. We’ve known her since she was a kid. She’s not with them, relax we can trust her” Mike supported you, confirming your concerns. He was just testing you.

Arriving at home, you parked in your driveway, telling them to follow you as you walked up a short flight of stairs to your door. You felt a sense of nerves inviting Armando into your home and you weren’t sure whether that was because he was a criminal or extremely attractive, which was truly concerning. Walking into your home, everything remained as you left it with your laptop on the couch where you were seated, the chips and red bull beside you on the mahogany coffee table. The house wasn’t messy but looked lived in with there being left over steak and chips on the table that you hadn’t yet cleaned up from dinner, some cups in the sink that required cleaning from the night prior that were on display with the dim kitchen light still on, illuminating the small kitchen and the remaining condiments that you had not packed up yet. Your home was small along with your kitchen, so any small mess would look like a lot. 

“Sorry guys, the house is a bit of a mess. I had just finished dinner before your location pinged” you lied slightly trying to excuse the mess. “there’s leftover food if you guys are hungry and give me a sec, I’ll get you guys something to change into” you offered as you walked to fetch them clothes to change into, unsure of what  or why they were wearing those clothes. 

“What man does she have that lives here?” Armando’s thick accent echoing from the room. It sounded more pronounced than usual, Furrowing your brows, you continued to listen as you selected clothes for the three of them. 

“Why do you care?” Mike asks accusingly which makes you chuckle slightly. 

“I’m just saying, is he gonna walk in here, and see us all here and rat us out? we need to be smarter than that, or do we trust everyone that you say we can, because that didn’t work out with Tabitha” he answered defensively, and Mike threw a knowing hum as I finished collecting their clothes. 

I walk out of the spare room with the clothes and smile sweetly in hopes that maybe he’ll finally trust me and explain “My brother comes and stays at mine when he’s in town. No one is going to come in, like I said,  you can trust me” 

He stares at me again as if he doesn’t give a fuck, his eyes give away nothing and I wait expectantly for some sort of comeback. 

“Don’t worry about him y/n, he knows no one’s walking in. He just asking questions he shouldn’t” Mike waved him off as Marcus in the kitchen where he was already hammering my snacks. 

Armando still staring and this becoming increasingly awkward, you handed him some clothes, not noticing which ones you offered him, he took them without fight and walked to the shower without a single thank you, causing you to mutter “a thank you would be nice, it’s not like I’m begging for you to stay” 

“Enojado te queda bien” he mumbled as he slammed the door. You furrowed your brows, unsure of what he just told you, he could have insulted you for all you know. You had known this man for all of five minutes and he was already getting on your nerves. Slipping off your hoddie, you noticed Mike and Marcus plating some of the leftovers which you were happy about, you followed in to help them and although the man in the bathroom was pissing you off, you did feel bad for him given he was just in prison and was now on the run because someone was trying to kill him so Ultimately, you decided to plate him some too before they demolished it all. 

“Your son is showering I think, so you guys can go next. The clothes are on the couch” you announced as you plated the food. Marcus paused plating and eyed out the plate in your hand.

“I thought you ate” he asked knowingly, well it was more of a statement that caused you to roll your eyes.

“Don’t give me that look Marcus, I’m putting him a plate before you demolish the food” you explained in defence. 

“Mhmm” he hummed offering me a side eye while he returned to plating his food. 

“Marcus don’t mhm me! As much of a dick he is, I’m not heartless” you argued again defensively, there was most definitely nothing of what Marcus was insinuating. He was a criminal for god’s sake! Yes, a gorgeous one but nevertheless a criminal.

You moved to dish as the boys went to eat dinner on the couch, given the size of your house, there was really no room to fit a dining table in the kitchen or living room, so you opted to have a multi-use coffee table instead. As you were washing the dishes you heard the bathroom door open, forcing yourself not to turn your head only so you didn’t offer Marcus anymore ammo to suggest anything further, continuing to clean you dishes. You felt the warmth of his presence near you as you assumed he was reaching for the food you’d plated him, the closer he got, the harder it was to keep your eyes trained on the dishes, let alone your focus. You moved your eyes slightly to see him eyeing the food out with caution, any tension remaining sprinting out of your body as you rolled your eyes at his distrust.

“it’s not poisoned Armando” you stated obviously unable to hide the second eye roll. His eyes lifting with his head still facing down and lips tilted in a slight smirked. Soon after his head followed the position of his eyes, looking straight at you with a smirk. His eyes slowly skimming your now slightly more exposed body up & down until he finally reached your eyes again. Your brows furrowed yet again, analysing the situation that just occurred.

“Are you? Are you trying to piss me off on purpose?” you questioned with your voice an octave higher.

He chuckled at your question and flicked his head in demand “Can I have a fork Mami?” he asked with the same smirk on his face.

You were embarrassed to admit the baby name caught you off guard, he had your head turning to the forks trying to identify the purpose of the utensil he requested, then turning back to him trying to figure out what game he was playing.

You turned you back to the forks and him at least twice until you demanded an answer “Why are you trying to piss me off, what’s your game?” you asked furiously as you grabbed him a fork.

“Like I said, Angry looks good on you mami” he stated as a matter of fact. Your eyes widen in shock and if you were flustered before, you were a walking mess after that comment. You stood in the kitchen staring at his back absolutely flabbergasted at the sudden change, you needed a second to breath, to process the two comments he made. One minute he was as cold as Antarctica, next he was playing jokes and calling you very cute nicknames that may or may not have sounded 10 times better in his accent. You pinched yourself and walked to the living room hearing Mike call you in the background, deciding to sit on the floor far from Armando and turned straight to Mike.

“Did you like the food?” You asked Mike, trying to ignore the hot stare on your left. You could feel him staring and eating at the same time.

“Thank you so much y/n, for the food but also for putting yourself on the line for us, I know what risk you are taking.” He thanked with sincerity.

You smiled at his sincerity “Mike, you know I would stop everything for you guys, next time just come straight to me please?” you asked honestly, and he smiled back and nodded acknowledging your heartfelt request. You, out of instinct turned your focus to the burning stares on your left, forgetting your internal feud and notice him staring intently this time, no playfulness or smugness, just wonder and awe at your loyalty. His focus re-trained, noticing you starting he smiled, not one reaching his eyes but one that you could tell meant something. This smile sparked something in you, it was probably also seeing him eat like he hadn’t eaten in months, which may have truly been the case, given that he was in prison, but whatever it was it had you inclined to personally ask him if he liked the food.

“Are you enjoying the meal, Armando?” you asked as you looked at him innocently, and while it may as well could have been innocent. Armando’s heart melted at little at your concern, he could see the worry in your eyes, the need for him to say yes that he was enjoying it. Not that he would be lying if he said yes, he hadn’t eaten a proper meal in months, let alone a home cooked piece of steak but that face would have made him say yes anyway.

The jokes and games for a second forgotten, lost in your eyes and he smiled softly as he answered “Yes, thank you y/n”. She smiled and looked toward her lap with a slight blush on her face leaving Armando weak for more. He coughed almost to break the spell you had put him under and looked at Mike, his brows were raised almost as warning but right now, he really didn’t care, he just wanted to make you smile again.

“Ok, well! I’ll take that as my cue, Mike you wanna go sleep?” Marcus announced awkwardly. Mike caught on quick and jumped at the offer agreeing at least three times that he was tired.

“Oh uh of course, I have a spare room, there is a mattress under the bed too if you guys want to take the spare room?” you blinked, shaking yourself out of whatever head fuck that Armando caused as offered the room.

“Yeah, sounds good, Armando are you good to take the couch?” Mike asked not really giving him an option. Armando just nodded while finishing of his food.

“Armando can take my room, I’m okay on the couch tonight” I offered, knowing they’d only be staying here tonight.

“No. the couch is fine” He answered, causing you to frown a little as the dismissive tone on his voice. But little did you know, he didn’t want you sleeping on the couch.

“Honestly it’s fine, you guys are only here for one night and no offense, but you’ve been sleeping in a prison for ages, I fall asleep on my couch all the time” You over-explained hoping he would take you up on your offer. You looked at Mike and Marcus for encouragement and when they weren’t going to assist, you threw them a glare that forced them to convince him to take your bed. He reluctantly agreed and thanked you to which you smiled at again. God he should have said yes sooner if he’d known he’d see your smile again.

The boys cleaned up their plates and went off to bed as they had a so aggressively agreed they needed to do. You noticed Armando had finished his plate, so you offered him more which he politely declined. To say you were confused was an understatement, one minute he was mean and defensive, then flirty and now nice. He was difficult to read and even harder to please.

He packed his plate up as well; you watched as he then stood at the sink cleaning his dishes as you moved to the couch crossing your legs. He was wearing a black tank top that had his tanned arms on display, biceps flexing every time he scrubbed a little harder, at this point, you were staring at him unashamedly. Well, that was before he called you out for it.

“You gonna keep staring, or you wanna help” he smirked still washing, but you were not going to let him have this one, not while you had the confidence to stare at him.

“didn’t I give you a top plus the tank?” You asked knowing that you were calling him out for choosing to look so fucking sexy right now. Ok maybe it wasn’t much of a comeback, but hopefully it would catch him off guard, the same way he did to you. He paused washing, indicating it may have had the desired effect, causing a small smirk to lift on your lips.

He looked up, rinsing off the last dish “Where’d your hoodie go?” he asked back almost in retaliation walking closer to you. You just lifted your shoulders with a cheeky confused look on your face “Tienes suerte eres hermosa” He commented in Spanish again.

Brows furrowing yet again with a slight frown “What does that mean?” more confident to ask.

He smiled so softly and leaned in close to your face, your eyes followed his movements and face still. As he moved closer to your ear, your eyes moved straight ahead focusing on his voice. “You are lucky you're beautiful” He translated. Your head turned so quickly looking directly at him, your faces almost touching. He looked down at your lips and then back up your eyes, his head moved slightly and opted for a soft peck on the cheek as he whispered goodnight.

This man would be the absolute death of you, you knew this for sure.

[h0neylevi]

Hi! this is my first time requesting and i’m actually nervous abt it or messing up but could you do reader constantly flirting with levi (aot) jokingly but gets like soooo flustered and blush the moment they get complimented or when he flirts back? thanks!!

hello anon!

i'm sorry this took me so long -_- i do hope you're still around to see it ❤︎

c/w: modern au, alcohol/drinking, gn!reader w/c: 1699

Levi never took a compliment at face value.

His most ardent cheerleader was usually Hange, and receiving any level of attention from them was usually undercut by a layer of mischief that diminished any sincerity in their words.

It never seemed to bother him, but he didn’t seem to take much stock in their words either. It was just Hange, after all. And Hange was not usually very serious.

You on the other hand had a more reliable record of being genuine. So when he didn’t respond with his usual dry remark the first time you complimented him, it didn’t surprise you.

Instead, grey eyes found yours, a flicker of confusion clouding his expression before it was gone again. He never acknowledged what you said, but his body language had stiffened slightly. Hange was the first to point out later that his cheeks had looked a little flushed.

After that, it became a running thing–more for yours and Hange’s amusement than anything–to see if you could manage to fluster him again. He quickly learned to tune the both of you out, only sparing a stern glare in Hange’s direction as a way of showing his displeasure.

The trouble wasn’t remembering when it became a running joke to shamelessly flirt with him. It was pinpointing exactly when the lines began to blur and it no longer felt like a joke, but telling the truth.

You consider the situation again as you drop into a seat in the middle of a bar one Friday evening. The lights are low and warm, casting everything in a honey glow that enhances the carefree atmosphere of idle chatter and music. You stir the two skinny cocktail straws in your drink to the beat of some upbeat pop song and look around.

It isn’t exactly packed, but it isn’t empty either. People mill about in small groups, taking up space at the bar and hovering around outside near the entrance for smoke breaks. Your friends–Hange, Erwin, Levi, and Mike–have taken control of one of the pool tables in the corner not far away. You watch as Hange leans over the table and takes their shot, sinking a solid ball into one of the corner pockets with a pump of their fist.

They back up and exchange a high-five with Mike, giving Levi the space to move forward and survey the table. From the low light, you see the little pinch of focus that forms between his brows. His eyes scan over the possible plays before he rounds the corner and leans into place.

You become acutely aware that you’ve stopped stirring your drink and look away before he takes his shot. Back to the drink in your hand that’s growing more watered down by the minute.

As excited as you initially were about getting out with your friends tonight, you don’t feel like drinking. The music is too loud and the atmosphere feels too cramped. And it’s all because of this stupid unrequited crush that’s bloomed without you really even realizing it.

You take a deep drink and sigh, the underlying taste of alcohol burning on the way down. Normally you’d be happy to have such a heavy-handed pour, but tonight it just seems to settle like lead in your stomach.

Maybe you should just go home. Have the rest of the leftovers in your fridge and go to sleep early.

You’re just beginning to plan your exit speech when someone approaches your table.

“What are you doing over here?”

When you look up, you’re surprised to find none other than the subject of your thoughts.

As Levi waits for your answer, he takes a sip of the drink in his hand. From the color, you’d guess a high proof spirit mixed with soda. For as long as you’ve known him, he’s never been much of a beer drinker.

Despite the butterflies that form in your stomach from being caught off guard, you pull your expression into an easy smile. After months of trying to get under his skin, it feels natural.

“Trying to look available.”

His brows raise like he’s almost unsure he’s heard you correctly. “Available?”

You nod. “Mhm.”

You expect that to be the end of it, for him to nod and go back to his game of pool but to your surprise, he slides into the seat opposite you and sets down his drink. “And how is that working for you?”

You let out a quiet laugh and prop your chin on your hand. “Well considering I’ve only managed to attract the one person who’s rejected me for over six months, I’d say not well.”

For a moment, he just stares and you’re left to wonder if maybe your tone came across a little too sincere for comfort. It was getting harder these days to appear lighthearted about your feelings.

But if Levi’s particularly rattled by your words, he doesn’t let on. His gaze falls to his glass a second later, gently swirling it so the ice inside clinks together. For several tense seconds, you wait, wondering what he’s thinking until he finally says, “I’ve never rejected you.”

If someone had asked you what you expected him to say, it would have taken you all night to land on that particular arrangement of words.

You frown, not understanding where the sudden shift in his demeanor is coming from. “You have,” you argue back, your tone growing more serious. “A lot actually.”

He looks back up, and the expression on his face turns pointed. “I don’t remember ever saying no.”

“You’ve never said anything,” you point out.

He nods along, giving you a look that suggests your point only further supports his argument. “Exactly.”

But you give him a flat look, just short of rolling your eyes. “No response is still a response, Levi.”

A brief silence settles between you then, somehow not permeated by the buzz of the music and chatter surrounding you on all sides. In fact, it feels like there’s no one else around. A feeling you were rather hoping wouldn’t happen, even if another, much larger part of you is still pleased that he’s speaking to you at all.

Then Levi leans forward, catching your attention despite the way you attempt to avoid his gaze. He rests his arms on the table, resting his fingertips against the rim of his glass. “Try again then.”

You flash him a narrowed, skeptical look. “Why would I do that?”

“Dunno,” he shrugs. “Maybe you’ll get a different answer this time.”

You can hardly believe what you’re hearing. You take the time to look at him, really look at him. For the most part, he looks exactly how he always does–hair neatly combed and framing that set of grey eyes you like looking into so much. There’s something slightly different about them tonight though, half-lidded and relaxed in a way similar to his posture. Like he isn’t so on edge and on the defensive.

“Are you drunk?” you guess.

“I probably shouldn’t drive,” he concedes after a moment. “But I don’t need to be drunk to flirt with you.”

That catches you off guard. Enough to where you take a sharp breath in, the air getting stuck in your chest as warmth blooms over your face. It’s difficult to look him in the eyes, but it’s also just as hard to look away when the eye contact he’s giving you makes your heart skip several beats.

But still, you try not to let his boldness make you too foolish.

You take another sip of your drink, stalling for time in an effort to get your racing thoughts under control. “I’ll believe it when you try with that hangover you’re going to have tomorrow.”

He stares at you for what feels like minutes, seemingly considering your words before saying, “Okay.” You think for the second time that that’s the end of whatever has possessed him to come and talk to you, but he speaks again. “Want to meet up for coffee tomorrow morning?”

“Coffee?” you repeat, too dumbstruck to do anything but uselessly repeat his words.

The corner of his lips quirk into a small grin.

“See, they take these seeds from a plant and roast them–”

You scowl, but the smile that accompanies it undermines any attempt to make it look as though you’re actually offended. “I know what coffee is.”

“Are you sure?”

“It’s like you don’t want me to say yes.”

The amusement in his eyes flickers out slightly and he re-settles his attention to taking another long sip from his drink. For a moment, you think that maybe you’ve ruined your chances by taking the joke too far, but his posture is still relaxed. He doesn’t make a move to leave.

“I wouldn’t have asked if I didn’t want you to say yes,” he finally says, his voice softer as he turns to look at you again.

There’s a seriousness in his tone, but it lacks the hard-lined edges that you’re so used to. Maybe that’s why it causes your heart to keep racing. You may not know what he’s thinking, but you know he’s being genuine.

You take a slow, intentional breath to try and keep from vibrating out of your seat with nerves. A hysterical, irrational thought occurs to you suddenly that maybe this is his way of getting back at you for all of the months of jokes. But the Levi you know wouldn’t do that. Would he?

Finally, you say, “If you’re just joking around, I’m going to be so disappointed.”

“Then it’s a date.”

Before you can respond, there’s some shouting from the corner, and Levi turns to see that the others are calling him over. A familiar face appears at the crook of Mike’s elbow, and you realize Nanaba has finally arrived. Erwin is preoccupied with adjusting the rack on the table, but the rest are watching you both with a mixture of expectation and curiosity.

They must want to start another game. Hange gestures to the table when you both look over, confirming your suspicions.

Levi turns.

“Coming?” he asks, still not rising from his seat. “Unless you’d rather go somewhere now.”

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[am-i-the-asshole-official]

aita for calling out someone for being manipulative towards a trans friend? Names have been changed for privacy reasons and TLDR at the end because this is long.

I (24f) am cis but have had a lot of trans friends (binary, nonbinary, and neopronoun) throughout the years and am very supportive so i take this very seriously. So I met this girl my first year in college (we were 18 at the time) and we became friends. We're polar opposites, she talks a lot and I don't, she parties a lot and I like to do more sophisticated things, she's a typical extrovert basically, and I'm more introverted. Anne (24f) was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. I don't know when, she just told me this years ago. I've seen tiktoks about bpd and researched Google about bpd a little so I know all about how they have fave persons and will "mimic" people in the friend group and become clingy, manipulate, etc. I've seen pics of her in high school, noticed that she was a theater kid, she said she was good at acting and even said she thinks her bpd helped with her acting although I'm not sure how, but she said she only joined the theater club because a boy she had a crush on was in theater. That should've been my first red flag but I was naive. She has a degree in something else (not theater) because our second year in college her favorite character in a TV show did a certain job, she got interested in that, and now she also does that as a living. She doesn't talk about her bpd, she's only mentioned it a handful of times. I can count on one hand how many times. And I get it because she said someone once told her people with bpd should be sterilized and not be allowed near children. Which is really messed up and I hate that someone said that.

However on with the situation. One of our friends Mike (25m) is a trans man. We met him four years ago. He's very handsome, broody, introverted, intelligent, great listener, very accepting and understanding, similar to me but opposite to her. Now we didn't know he was trans until two years ago, because I asked him on a date and he turned me down, and when I asked why he told me that he was mostly T4T and only viewed me as a friend. We were like woah you're trans, okay that's cool, etc. He explained that he was lucky enough to get on puberty blockers and transition young etc which is why he passes. I said okay I'm not trans and you're mostly T4T fair enough.

Well last year Anne suddenly tells us that she is trans too. She says she's bigender. She says she is okay with either she her or he him because she feels like a man and a woman at the same time. Some days she's a woman, some days she's a man, and some days she's both, according to her. She says she does not like they them pronouns. Suddenly her and Mike are spending all this extra time together. Last month he confided in me that he thinks he's in love with her, after years of him only seeing her as a friend, and then they started officially dating.

Here's the problem: she has not changed her outward appearance, her name, started any kind of medical stuff, joined any groups, bought a binder etc. We all continue to call her she and her because she fully presents as female and doesn't have a problem with it. Also she's very effeminate in body language, the way she talks, etc. I know technically I could call her a he or a him, too, but she never asks me to or corrects people when they call her she because well technically she is a she too. Mike is the only one who uses he and him pronouns with her as often as she and her, but she has never thanked him. It really feels like she's saying she's trans and then going about her life exactly as a cis woman simply to convince Mike to date her.

First off, Anne and Mike are NOT compatible. She likes to party, smoke weed, talks a lot, I'm not sure how she graduated with such good grades or why she does so well in her job because she is honestly a LOT to handle and I'm saying that as nice as possible. Mike would never touch weed or go to clubs and he says he would be fine staying home while she does those things but how could you trust someone to party while high and not hook up with others? I've seen her make out with five people in one night at a frat party. They also had wildly different childhoods, such as she grew up in a conservative community and doesn't speak to her family, and he grew up in a liberal area and is close with his family. But more importantly she has a history of joining theater because she had a crush on someone in theater (plus she admits she is good at acting, so maybe she is acting now?) and getting a degree and job in a field because a favorite fictional character did that and now this? It feels like she was attracted to him, found out he usually dates other trans people, and found a way to continue being cis but claim to be trans without having to do anything trans related, basically mimicing her favorite person. As soon as they met they hit it off, or should I say she clung to him and pretended to have the same likes and dislikes whenever they were alone I assume.

It sounds terrible I know, which is why I discussed this with a group chat first that neither of them are in, and the group chat not only agreed that she is far too "obnoxious" for him (those were NOT my words!) but that she is faking being trans in an attempt to make him fall in love with her (which seems to be working.) I would NEVER have gone further without making sure with them first. So then a few of the people in my group chat and I held an intervention with Anne alone. The six of us (the others don't live close enough to come) met up with Anne at her place and told her what she was doing was wrong and gross and that she needed to get help for her bpd and to stop catfishing Mike. She didn't take well to what was said, which I anticipated, but she went crazy. She was screaming at us, insulting us, sobbing while yelling etc, literally said if we ever contacted her again she would call the cops, so we left.

I immediately called Mike before she could and asked him to meet me at a restaurant nearby and that it was very important. Since Mike doesn't know anyone in the group chat I went alone and I explained EVERYTHING before she could gaslight and manipulate him even further. He left, did not finish or pay for his food. I messaged him several times, but a few hours later he texted me to never to speak to him again, and then blocked me on everything. I showed up to his house and Anne was there. Mike said if I ever contacted him again he would get a restraining order on me so I left. I've discussed this with the group chat and now suddenly half of them changed their mind and don't want to talk about it anymore. Several of them left the group chat. Not only that but several of my friends who know either Mike or Anne or both have blocked me on everything. When I've tried to contact these friends through other means and explain everything, they either didn't respond or said for me never to contact them again because I was being transphobic. Listen I know under NORMAL circumstances you shouldn't question when someone comes out but this is NOT a normal situation, and now I am concerned Anne is unsafe for Mike but also an unsafe person to know, as she literally is trying to destroy my life because I called her out on some seriously messed up and abusive behavior.

TLDR am I the asshole for trying to protect my trans friend from a potential stalker?

What are these acronyms?

[highhhfiveee]

okay here me out. abby teasing reader about having a crush on mike, and when he's around very 'subtle' teasing from abby to reader... SORRY IF THIS DOESNT MAKE SENSE BUT ITS BEEN ON MY MIND.

it makes sense! i was working on a little ficlet for the "mint" series and i think this works with it (,:

self care

a "mint" ficlet. read the og here: 🍫

wc: 2k tags: mint!mike and reader, fluff, no warnings, just cute stuff (:

mike lets out a long sigh as he turns the car off, rubbing his hands down his face. security work is exhausting, and while he understands working overnight shifts, he doesn't see how it's healthy.

he's always tired, always irritable, always ready to call it quits and say "fuck work", staying home until he's caught up on his winks.

it would be a dream for him, he thinks, but he knows it's not realistic. he's doing this to better his life, better abby's life; it would all be worth it in the end, he hoped.

he exits the car with no urgency, trotting his way to the front door. he's excited to see you and abby, eager to sit and eat breakfast with you guys, tell you about his night.

he turns the knob and it gives with no trouble, which makes his heart rate tick up. the door is never unlocked.

he bursts inside frantically, beginning to panic a bit when he sees that you aren't in your usual spot on the couch, cuddled into one of the blankets or sweeping your green mint wrappers into your hand. the tv wasn't on. there wasn't anything happening in the kitchen.

it was eerily quiet, too quiet for his liking.

"y/n?" he calls, wildly hanging his security vest and kicking off his shoes. "abby?"

mike wonders why the two of you aren't answering, beginning down the hall with his hands balled into anxious fists. what if something had happened to you two? what if he went into one of the rooms and found something undesirable, something that turned him frigid and reserved? what if someone had hurt you?

the light's on in the bathroom, framing the closed door in a fuzzy ring of yellow gold. mike hears voices, muffled but persistent, and music. it's all it takes for him to lean against the door, grip the doorknob and count down before he charges into the wood, slamming the door open and yelling into the bathroom.

you and abby squeal, bodies wracked with fear. you both have green paste all over your faces, spread around your eyes and mouths in a precise layer. you're holding onto your chest as you try to calm down, tapping on your phone to stop the music you're playing. abby heaves angrily, marching over to mike and giving him a moderately powered shove. "not funny, mike!"

"i wasn't trying to be funny," he utters, huffing along with you two. "i thought someone had broken in or something. the door was unlocked and i called for both of you but you didn't answer. i was terrified." you frown, shaking your head in disappointment at yourself.

"i'm really sorry, mike. i took the trash out earlier and i guess i forgot to lock the door when i came back in. i would never try to put abby in harm's way."

"no, no, it's okay," mike returns, taking a deep-rooted sigh of relief now that he knows you two are safe. "i know you wouldn't. mistakes happen, i just lost it a little. wouldn't want anything to ever happen to you two."

your cheeks heat up at "you two". you're flattered that he cares about your safety at the same level that he cares about abby's, or at all really. you knew that abby meant everything to him, but you wondered just how much you meant to him, exactly.

"that's totally understandable. sorry i didn't hear you calling either, we were kind of caught up in the music and face masks," you chuckle shyly, pulling the sleeves of the forest green sweatshirt you were wearing over your hands. it's mike's sweatshirt, one that he thinks he remembers giving to abby sometime ago. you look good in it.

"y/n was teaching me about 'self care', and how doing little things for myself is important. we started with skincare, see?" abby places her hands under her chin, using them to hold her face as she smiles.

it hadn't been your plan to use your $40 face mask on abby this morning, but you didn't mind. you'd been in the bathroom, humming along to the soothing ambient music that floated from your phone speakers and smothering your face in green like you'd be starring in Wicked when she appeared in the doorframe, bleary eyed and lethargic. "may i pee?"

you exited the bathroom and closed the door behind you, opening it back up once you heard the toilet flush and the faucet run. "what's on your face?" she asked, shaking the water off of her hands.

"it's a face mask. this one is my personal favorite. it's specifically for moisturizing the skin, but there are so many other ones that do different things. i do them sometimes as a part of self care."

"what's self care?"

"i can explain it to you. want to try some of the mask after you brush your teeth?" she nodded happily, beginning to shed any trace of sleepiness.

"my skin is a bit dry." you laughed at her, helping her with her toothbrush. after, you'd sat her on the bathroom counter, scooping product with your middle and ring fingers and smearing it across abby's delicate skin.

"so, it's just like...taking care of yourself? literal self care?" you nodded, filling in whatever gaps you could find.

"mhm. just doing small things to make yourself feel better, happy, more fulfilled. we all need to take care of ourselves, living these lives. it's important to remember to take time for yourself when you need it, okay? taking breaks is good. humans need rest."

"mike never rests," she admitted, pouting at the thought of mike working all the time, tired and distant from the strain on his mental and physical health. "i don't even think he knows what rest is."

"i'm sure he does, he's just working hard to make sure you're never in need. he cares about you a lot, and wants you to be safe, and happy, and taken care of."

"which is nice," abby muttered, turning to look at her face in the mirror. she smiled, humming in contentment before facing you again. "i just wish he would go do something. take off from work and go out. go on a date." you jovially scoff at her words, tickling at her abdomen.

"what do you know about dating, huh? does mike even like dates?"

"i think he'd like a date with you." your entire body flushed with mortification, and you stepped back from abby, stumbling over your words with nervous laughter.

"t-t-there's no way he would, abby. that's silly. i don't even like him like that, it would be unprofessional..." you bit at your bottom lip, avoiding abby's eyes.

"oh please. you're my unpaid babysitter, not a salaried nanny," she reassured curtly, and you frowned at her, playfully insulted. "plus, i know you have a crush on him, y/n. it's so obvious. i saw you nearly die when he gave you those mints. i'm sure he see stuff like that too if he wasn't so clueless about everything."

you nodded, gnawing at your bottom lip so hard you drew blood. "well, jeez, thank you for the exposé, abby. still, i don't think he feels the same way. he has no time to think about me." abby only squinted at you, her lips pursed with amusement.

"or so you think." you'd waved her off, pivoting the subject by showing her your skincare collection, explaining all the different tubes and bottles. you'd fanned them out over the counter, grouping things by step.

"and this is vitamin c...usually comes before your moisturizer and helps with dark spots, dullness...you have to wear sunscreen when you wear it, but you should be wearing sunscreen everyday anyway bec----"

mike had burst in at this moment, scaring the shit out of both you and abby. how you'd forgotten to lock the door, you didn't know, but you're glad mike had gotten home before anyone else could enter.

now, mike just tiredly returns his sister's smile. "that's nice, abs."

"yeah, was telling y/n that you should try it. you need to rest and take care of yourself." mike nods, pursing his lips in that tickled way that abby did earlier.

"that so? do a couple of face masks, take a bath, and make some tea to renew myself?"

"sounds like a plan to me," abby cheers, looking towards you. "add going on a date to the list and now, we're talkin'."

"a date?" mike ridicules, shaking his head at abby's frivolous suggestion. "a date with who?"

"i may know someone," abby teases, winking over at you so unmistakably that you're sure you're going to combust with the number of times you've flushed hot. "someone not too far, in fact."

mike can tell that abby is killing you, prodding at your private, adult feelings and decides to make her stop. "okay, abs, that's enough. wash your face while i go talk to y/n, okay? and no eavesdropping."

"i can try, but not promise."

"abby," mike asserts, and she shrinks under his serious stare, mumbling, "okay, okay, jeez."

you follow mike out into the living room, once again tugging at the sleeves of his sweatshirt. it drapes over you nicely, about one size too big, and the color looks so nice against your skin, rich and earthy.

"thanks for looking after her, as always," he commends, eyes still trained on you as you return his kindness with a soft "yeah, always. sorry again about the door." but mike dismisses your apology with a wave.

after a moment, he says, "that sweatshirt's nice," rubbing his fingers against his stubbled chin.

you drop your gaze down, smiling at the clothing item. you liked it a lot. it was super comfy and smelled like their place, pacifying you through the late night and early morning. "oh thanks. i left my sweater at home and abby let me borrow this one. it's so cute on her but it's super big."

"yeah," mike snickers, letting out some air through his nose. "that's 'cause it's mine." your body's color is replaced with flaming red, burning from the top of your forehead to the soles of your feet. how many more times could you be embarrassed this morning?

"oh my god, i'm so sorry. here, i can give it back," you panic, beginning to pull the item over your head, careful to not get your face mask on it. mike stops you with a hand to your elbow, a gentle graze that doesn't move even when you have the sweatshirt back over your torso.

"hey, hey, no need. i gave it to her but i like how it looks on you. you look really beautiful...face mask and all." you blush vehemently, whimpering out "thank you" and bringing your thumb to your mouth to gnaw at so you don't say something else you might regret. you're sure mike can read your jitteriness, and you try to slip into a cool girl attitude when his eyes toss coyness your way.

you'd been babysitting abby for a while, and something about the way you continued to despite the hours and not being paid softened mike. of course he intended on paying you, but even when he did, he would always remember you as so kind, so generous; such a beautiful soul in a beautiful body.

"so...about that date?" he proposes, and the two of you hear a hushed, "yes!" around the corner of the wall. you both turn towards it, catching abby as she runs across the hall to her room.

"abby!"

"i said try!"

how flipping CUTE! i love cute shit like this, and after writing so much smut, it was nice to write something oh so sweet (((: gonna be posting smut next though lmao, just something slight, something slight. hope you enjoyed!

faire's seedlings ✿

@leahdhopkins4321-@pyr0-kai-@angstywhore-@sunazroo-@nyxthoughtss-@mirophobic-@fayethor-@marixsimps-@regretfulme-@ithinkitszeph-@707xn-@cattt777-@violetta-ximena-@amnesia33-@topnerd03-@fastnights-@laprvphette-@savage-aespa-@mfdxz-@0-tatiana-0-@dusstory

[louloulemons-posts]

Shy smiles

Eddie Munson X Shy!Reader

Summary : Eddie and reader crushing on each other.

Word Count : 1k

Warnings : Not Proofread, major fluff, use of Y/N, kinda rushed, I was in need of fluffy Eddie honestly, idiots in love, very ramble-ly, fem pronouns are used, but readers not described physically.

~ / / / * \ \ \ ~

He knew you because of Nancy, you were a childhood friend of hers, along with Barb. You were quiet and normally went unnoticed, but not by him. Never by him.

He remembers the first time you caught his eye. You were walking down the hall, waving goodbye to Nancy and didn’t realise he was next to you. Bumping into him, dropping all of your stuff, along with him dropping his.

“I’m so sorry!” You said quickly, picking up his things, along with yours. “I’m sorry too, seems like we were both in our own worlds huh?” He smiled at you, helping you.

Standing up, he handed you a book and you passed him his D20 dice. “I’m really sorry,” you said, meeting his eyes. He was taken aback, you were beautiful. “It’s okay Sweetheart, just mind you don’t hurt yourself okay?” He smiled crookedly.

“‘Kay,” you said, gently. That’s the first word that came to mind. You were so gentle. Not dainty, no weak, but gentle. Like you wouldn’t hurt anyone or anything, you’d do things with care.

Shaking his head slightly, he spoke once more, “Well it was nice to bump into you, you have a good day.”

“You too Eddie,” you smiled slightly. His mouth went slack, you knew him. You knew his name.

You turned from him and carried on to your locker. He stood there, watching you. Not in a creepy way - okay maybe it was slightly creepy. But he was in awe. “Munson!” A voice shouted.

“Let’s go,” Gareth called to him.

“Uh, yeah I’m coming.”

~ / / / * \ \ \ ~

That’s the first time he met you. He thought about it often. Since that day he’d had a sixth sense for you. He knew when you walked in a room, or saw you as soon as he entered one.

And then he met Mike Wheeler, which meant he met Nancy, which meant he met you. Properly this time. He saw you often, but you were so quiet, he didn’t want to scare you off.

Playing D&D in the Wheelers basement has become a regular thing this summer.

It was one of the spaces large enough for the boys to hang out, and as Wheeler parents didn’t mind it was perfect. Eddie pushed up from his seat, excusing himself to the bathroom.

Running up the stairs he waved to Mrs Wheeler and Holly. The pair smiled at him and he carried on up to the next floor. Walking to the bathroom, he hummed to himself, but when he went to open the door someone walked out and into him.

Looking down he saw a familiar face. “Y/N,” he breathed out. “Hey Eddie,” you smiled sheepishly, “Sorry for bumping into you, really need to stop doing that.”

He chuckled, “I’m sorry too. How are you? It’s been a while.”

“I’m doing good, college is kicking my ass but you know,” you shrugged, and he noticed how you played with the bottom of your shirt.

“How about you? How’s everything?”

“Well I finally graduated.”

“I heard! Congratulations.”

“Thanks,” his face warmed. “Oh and I’ve got a new job at Hawkins mechanics.”

“That’s so great, I’m so glad for you,” you said honestly. “That you, what is it you’re studying?”

“Oh forensic science.”

“Wow. I’m not surprised, you were always the smartest girl in school.”

“I dunno about that.”

“You were.”

“I think people would disagree, if they remembered me,” you laughed to yourself.

“Well I remember you. Never forgot.”

You looked up to meet his deep chocolate eyes. “You didn’t?”

“How could I? How could anyone forget you?” You face turned pink and warm, which made Eddies mouth lift in a smile.

“Never forgot you either.”

“Little old me?”

“Yeah you Eddie.”

“Well I’m hoping it was good impression I left.”

“Oh the best.” The pair of you smiled at each other, struggling not to grin.

A door opened down the hall, “Hey Y/N you okay?- Oh hi Eddie,” Nancy said, her head popping round the door. Eddie waved, “Wheeler.”

“Sorry Nance, me and Eddie were just catching up.”

“Oh yeah course take your time,” the girl gave you a knowing smile, and shut the door.

“Well I better let you get back to Nancy,” Eddie spoke. “Uh yeah of course.” Looking down at your shoes, you walked past each other. As he was about to enter you spoke, “Hey Eddie.”

“Yeah Sweetheart?” The nickname made your heart flutter. “I was um - I was just wondering,” you played with your fingers, twisting the rings that sat there. “If maybe, and feel free to say no, if maybe you’d wanna hang out sometime?”

Eddie paused, was this real? It couldn’t be, the girl he’d crushed on for so long was asking him out. “Like .. um like a date?” He asked.

“Y-yeah, like a date. If you want. Or as friends.”

“A date sounds good.”

“Great.”

“Great.”

“Gonna need a number to call,” you smiled.”

“Oh um right, I have no pen or paper, but Nancy has my number. You know cause of Mike and stuff. So ask her and call whenever you’d like,” he rambled on quickly.

“Okay, well I’ll call you then.”

“Can’t wait,” he smiled.

“See you.”

“See you.”

~ / / / * \ \ \ ~

You slipped into Nancy room shutting the door behind you. She sat up on her bed, wiggling in excitement. “So?” She said.

“I asked him out,” you spoke.

“And?”

“He said yeah!” You almost squealed, she ran from her bed and hugged you.

“Oh my gosh this is so exciting!”

“He um, he said to get my number from you,” you laughed, knowing Nancy had given it to you months ago, practically begging you to call the boy you’d fawned over for years.

~ / / / * \ \ \ ~

Eddie locked the bathroom door, unable to stop himself from grinning. Fist bumping the air a few times he was beaming.

He looked in the mirror and spoke to himself “Don’t mess this up Munson! She asked you out. She’s gonna call. You’re gonna go on a date.”

His smile was none stop, when he walked past the room you and Nancy were excitedly chatting in, past Mrs Wheeler and Holly, down to the basement.

The boys looked up at him, at his face. “Let me guess Y/Ns here,” Mike teased.

~ / / / * \ \ \ ~

Thank you so much for reading! Please leave any requests 🤍

[carolmunson]

okay, since some of you asked for it:

unpopular opinion but i don’t actually think eddie was a nice soft boy at all. dustin and mike are literally afraid to ask him to move hellfire. ‘he’s always revved up,’ implying that he’s always like this, always a little close to snapping. he’s not nice to them when he asks them to find a replacement. he also guilt trips them about 'taking them in like lost sheep' and shoves them off to find a replacement instead of keeping lucas included. which is why i don't understand the 'fierce protector of his friends' take because he's so quick to drop lucas just because he's 'moved to the dark side.' aka, throwing balls into laundry baskets.

which leads me to when he gets up on the table, people are not trying to fuck around with him. this is a common occurance, people are not surprised to see him up there and yelling. they aren't surprised that he's making a spectacle of himself. if eddie was soft and sweet, he would’ve gotten beat up. if eddie was soft and gentle, he'd probably be scared of jason. guys like jason in the 80s loved being macho and punching out losers — eddie just gave him the devil horns and called it a day. eddie’s absolutely gotten in fist fights before and won (his dad is a literal criminal!) otherwise someone would've thrown something or told him to shut the fuck up. people are scared of him, even his own friends! there’s more reasons than just playing DND and metal that make town certain that he’s a cult leader. you don't just assume someone is a murderer if they haven't shown any interest in violence before, especially considering his dad was likely a shitty dude. he even bullies erica when she first shows up to hellfire and only respects her when she bullies him back and bests him. he is someone you have to EARN respect from. he will never respect anyone outright or be understanding outright. he doesn't fully respect dustin or mike to start either, he views them as underlings.

even chrissy assumes he's going to be mean and scary, there's gotta be reason behind that. he's not nice or kind in school, which is likely a defense mechanism. he’s sweet with chrissy because he likes her, he has a crush on her. it’s very clear that he has since he was a kid, otherwise why would he bring up them hanging out in middle school? why would he even remember that if he hasn’t been pining for her this whole time? he admits too, albiet flirtily, that he thought SHE'D be mean and scary too, because he doesn't like people 'like that', people he assumes are 'on the dark side'. i’m sure he hoped they’d kiss a little when she went to his trailer. he's even a little sarcastic when she's there, again, defensive. 'the maid took the week off'. but ultimately, he's nice to her because he wants to kiss her and has a crush on her. i don't think it's because he's fully 'showing her who he really is'.

also he's a literal drug dealer????? like?????

he only becomes more gentle and open with dustin and co. when he gets pulled into the upside down/vecna stuff because he needs support. they grow a bond over shared trauma. and i do believe eddie had a big brother type relationship with dustin, but just like steve he loves him begrudgingly 'i love you, you little shit bag' kind of shit. i do believe he liked and cared for his friends but i also think he always had a big layer of mean kid armor on because he had a hard life growing up. how i percieved the character is 'mean bully whose secretly nice but is mean and boisterous and loud as a cover' trope. when he explains that his father taught him to hotwire, he seems bitter about it. of course he is, all the other kids were learning to play ball. but he obviously still retains this information and a whole bunch of other crime tricks from his dad. he's BEEN partaking in this shit. he KNOWS he's a shitty guy. you don't just get taught how to hotwire once and then suddenly know how to do it years later. he's done it before! multiple times! he has practice! he likely knows about warzone cause his daddy absoLUTELY had a gun or two. his dad probably took him there once. he was pulled left and right into bad shit growing up and that will HARDEN YOU. wayne says that murder 'ain't in his nature' and i'm sure it's not. i'm sure he's different with wayne, but idk, to me, it doesn't erase the fact that outwardly, i don't think eddie was nearly as sweet and gentle as people think he is canonically. i think he's a very hardened and tortured person and that even becomes clear with his reaction to chrissy's death and how he goes about things going forward. he was a weird kid with weird interests in a cookie cutter conservative town, had a criminal father, and an unconventional family situation in the 70s and 80s, that shit'll fuck you up and over -- look at boomers y'all! they are emotionally stunted! but, i could go on forever with this character analysis. so i'll stop here. but -- in the words of the real housewives reunion meme: that's MY OPINION!

[strangerthingssteddiebrainrot]

A little ficlet I was just inspired to write at 1am lol

Listen

Despite dating a rockstar, Steve was a pretty private person. Whenever he went with Eddie and the boys on tour, he'd wear sunglasses regardless of the actual weather conditions. Sometimes even a hat if he was really done with nosy reporters trying to figure out what his connection to Corroded Coffins lead singer was.

But it's been a long time since '89 when the band first took off and in the glorious year of 1999 they were finally outed by a reporter disguised as a waiter at the restaurant they were eating at and got a picture of them kissing if the corner of the private booth they were hiding in. Sales and the band's popularity took a hit sure, but so many new fans, freaks and outcasts and people just like them filled the void that they actually bounced back with more popularity than ever before. So Eddie and Steve agreed to do an interview on a daytime talk show, set the record straight and talk about themselves and their relationship openly for the first time. They talked about how high school cliques nearly kept them apart, but the spring break of '86, for all its tragedy and death and near death, brought them together and they worked hard to stay together. A true love story if there ever was one. It was freeing actually, finally being able to be open and Out, and if their love helped people, that was just a bonus.

Which is how no one, not even Eddie or the band knew about Steve's voice. He'd never been a singer, too insecure and beaten down to trust that he was actually good at something besides swinging a bat (and an ax, and Molotov cocktails). It was something he was working on, but change doesn't happen overnight and even now, in his early thirties, he still had never revealed his hidden talent to anyone other than Robin. And like, it's not like she ever said anything either! They sang sometimes back when they lived in each other's back pocket and she never said he was good, so he just assumed he was not terrible! Maybe the fact that she had a crush on Tammy Thompson and her 'muppet giving birth' singing should have been a clue. Steve just thought love made you blind.

So when, during the encore performance of Corroded Coffins latest show, Eddie gestures to him to come on stage, Steve tried to refuse at first. He waved him off laughing, but Eddie was persistent and the crowd caught on, chanting his name to come onstage. So he gave in, and god did he stick out like a sore thumb, light washed Levi's with a navy Henley, glasses on cause he had a migraine the day before from squinting at everything, it the crowd still cheered when he appeared, Eddie smiled at him all dimples and the guys gave an exaggerated slow clap at finally getting him onstage.

Eddie took his hand, the other one still holding his mike, and the band started up a cover of Tainted Love, one of the few songs that both Eddie and Steve agreed kicked ass. Maybe the lyrics didn't really reflect how they feel for each other, but watching Eddie sing to Steve, there was no doubt the man was very much in love. And when he held up the mike to Steve on the second chorus, Steve couldn't help but sing.

And oh, how Eddie's face dropped into open mouth shock, Steve had to catch his hand to keep the mike level. A quick glance showed the rest of the boys looked just as shocked, the music only continuing by pure muscle memory. Steve almost stopped singing, panicked that he was ruining the show with his voice, but the crowd was going wild and he could see the cameras flashing, and Eddie, Eddie was coming in close, the chorus over and he leaned in to Steve's ear and shouted, "don't stop!" So he didn't. And they finished the song together and thank god it was the last song in their set. So when Eddie pulled away and gave his goodbye with the rest of the band, Steve quickly walked offstage and headed to the green room, heart pounding a mile a minute.

It wasn't too long before the rest of the band piled in, and Eddie ran right to him, grabbing his face and kissing him hard.

Finally pulling away after too short a time, Eddie beamed at him. "How the fuck did I not know that you can sing?!"

Mind still a little scrambled from the kiss, Steve took a moment to answer. "Huh?"

Not the most eloquent, but he was still reeling from the loss of those lips against his own.

"Yeah man, when Ed said he was gonna pull you on stage, not gonna lie, I thought you were gonna sound awful." Garath said, earning a smack on the head from Jeff and Martin (unnamed freak).

"Not how I would've put it, but, I thought there was a reason you never sang with us before. So yeah, that was an unexpected surprise." Jeff smoothed over, knowing that so sometimes Steve's insecurities got the better if him, having mediated several fights between him and Eddie in the past.

"Holy shit baby, you were so good! I almost didn't remember to sing cause I was too busy falling even more in love with the most perfect man on earth!" Eddie gushed, gently shaking Steve by his shoulders.

"Cute, but also, get a room guys." Martin laughed. "But seriously Steve, you have a good voice. I don't know why we've been hiring background singers for some of our songs when we could've just had you do it instead."

"Oh, well, I-I don't know. I never thought I was a good singer yeah? Not for like, performing? I just wanted to kinda, ride the high of tonight, if that makes sense." Steve said, blushing and a little overwhelmed at the attention, but trying to embrace it and take the genuine compliments he was getting (something he struggled to do on a daily basis, neglectful parents having left their mark).

"First of all, bite me Martin," throwing his band mate the finger, Eddie was still beaming which softened the blow, the others laughing at him. "and second, Stevie, baby, you sound amazing! Light, but still raspy and sexy as hell." Giving him a peck on the cheek, Eddie whispered in his ear. "Gonna sing for me later big boy? In bed maybe?"

And what could Steve say to that? So he just pulled Eddie in for more kisses, deepening them regardless of the guys complaining.

The next day, the picture that was making waves in the music community was of Steve singing into the mike, Eddie looking at him with starts in his eyes and his face completely lovestruck.

@steddieassheg0es @oakenorcrist

[mmelionsblog]

Paranoid [Mike Schmidt x Reader]

“Don’t need nobody knowing , because I’m paranoid , of things I can’t avoid , just like me NEEDING you”

Mike was fine just last week, and now with the new night job he had gotten he’s crashed down within one day. You are Abby’s new baby sitter, due to Max not ever picking up Mike’s call which you thought was weird, because Max was always there for Mike when he needed her around.

Mike has been trying to avoid you at all cost, because just like everyone else in his life, they’ve left (including Max), and he doesn’t want Abby to be crushed knowing she loved you as much as he does. You and Mike have been friends since high-school, well on and off friends, but when you both are close you two are never inseparable. With this new job though, you’re beginning to think that Mike’s having another episode.

You were just reading a new book you had bought that week when you heard your phone ringing for you. Walking to the kitchen, you answered it and heard uneasy breathing. “Mike..?” You whispered out, unsure of who it is. Though if you had to guess, it’d definitely be your best friend because no one knows your house number other than him, and a few family members and one other friend.

You hummed, “id love to mike. But we both really need to have a chat when you get home, and I know you don’t like those chats but you just can’t leave me in the dust without saying anything.” Silence appeared on the other line of the phone call.

Sighing, you continued. “What time do you need me to be there for?”

“8.. or 9.. either or.” He shrugged with the answer he gave you. You nodded, and you’ve forgotten that he couldn’t see you through the phone. “Oh okay,” you respond quickly. “I’ll see you at nine then.” You placed the phone back onto the wall, leaning back onto the counter and running your hand through your hair. “Shoot, what have I done?” You whispered to yourself.

It was 8:55, and you lived on the other side of Mike’s house, so you locked your doors and walked over the street towards the one in front of you. You knocked, in the rhythm you and Mike would only know. Mike answered a second later; a relief is witnessed on his face. You walk inside the room, thanking him for holding the door. “Thank you,” he spoke. “For coming. Max never picked up her phone call and it was either you or her…” he indicated the lady that Abby most absolutely disliked. “Yeah.. think I’m the good choice to go with.” You chuckled out.

“Well, foods in the fridge on the bottom right and there are some drinks as well. Make yourself comfortable, and if the couch isn’t comfy you’re always welcomed to my room…” he trailed off. “Thanks Mike.” You responded. Abby came out of her room hearing another voice, and being correct as she was, she smiled upon seeing you. “No Max today Mike?” He responded, “nope.” She smiled widely at you. “Last time you were here you promised to play tea party with me and my friends. Can we do that tonight pleaseee?” She whined out. You nodded with a giggle following out of your lips.

As you were talking to Abby, Mike was watching the scene unfold. He felt a wave of anxiety has been taken off his body. “Alright you know the drill, I’ll be back home at 6:30.” Mike spoke. “Also, thank you really … it means a lot to me that you’ve came.” And that was the last thing that was said up until 6:30.

-

Like Mike said, he was home at 6:30. The lights of the front porch was off, the glass door locked from the inside, and the brown door just a tad bit open. He grabbed the spare key that he put in the pot, just in case, and opened up the door and placed the key back to where it was before.

The T.V was left on, though no sound was coming from it and everything was left off. He saw the make shift bed you built on the couch, but didn’t see you on there. So, taking off his shoes and placing his vest on the table, he quietly walked over to his room.

He opened the door, only to see that you weren’t also in his bed. Though it was messy and wasn’t the way how he last saw it. Mike looked over to the restroom to see the light open, and he heard the sound of water going and spit draining out into the sink. He slowly opened the door,, only to spook you out of your socks. “Jesus Mike,” you whispered. “Had me worried I didn’t lock the door last night.” You finished off. “M sorry,” he apologized.

“Thank you,” Mike said. “For watching Abby tonight.” He grabbed out his wallet, about to take a twenty out to give it to you but you stopped him. “The only payment I will be taking is the explanation as to why you’ve been avoiding me.” You spoke. Mike chewed his lips. He knew this was coming, but he didn’t know it would’ve been as soon as he came home.

He sighed. Might as well get it over with. “I’ve been avoiding you since I feel like you might leave me,” he flat out told you. No hiding the truth. “I mean come on, Garrett left. My parents left. Lady we don’t really mention around here wants nothing to do with me and Abby, and now Max has been avoiding us as well now. I’m just scared—” he hiccuped out. Tears were rolling down his face.

“Just scared you’d leave me. So I decided to leave first myself, so that Abby wouldn’t get hurt. She really loves you, you know. I do too. But I can’t risk her getting hurt over and over again, like me, I don’t want that to happen to—” he was trying to talk, but you threw yourself at Mike and wrapped your arms around him. You left gentle kisses along his neck. “I’d never leave you Mike.” You whispered, your face coming into view with him.

He hummed. “You’d never leave me?” “I promise, id never leave you. You are far too interesting to just up and leave. And plus, I love Abby. She is my favorite Schmidt.” You giggled. Mike rolled his eyes playfully. “Whatever you say…”

[capswarmedals]

BBC GHOSTS: DEEP DIVE

"You're a bloody fool, James!" - Ben Willbond, Inside Ghosts: A Christmas Gift.

CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR CHRISTMAS EPISODE AND SEASON 5. BE WARNED.

Okay, just before we start, I WILL be referring to BOTH James and The Captain. Wait and see, your poor little dumplings.

We all know The Captain. Brave, stern, always has a stiff upper lip and of course, most obviously, he's an ABBA loving star. Joking (not really though)!! The most obvious part is that he is gay, but he hides it deep down inside himself. You'd have to kill him to find out or well, you know what I mean (/ref). That part deep down inside himself is James. James. The real person, the person under the mask, the villain, the mastermind of it all. Except that... James isn't really anything like The Captain. James is not brave, not stern, never has a stiff upper lift, but he's still an ABBA fan and gay. Incredibly, incredibly gay.

We know that he had a very, VERY strong crush on Havers (Anthony as I will be referring to) as evident in the Cricket Report in the Button House Archives and in Redding Weddy/Carpe Diem. Throughout the series, we see James fall for men. Mike ("Yes, he'd make a very fine soldier."), Adam, the director ("Yes, though I might just... Check."), Pat (even though it's not as obvious, but it's certainly there).

Many people, including myself, head canon James/The Captain to be autistic, and I can very much add some reason and proof to these reasons.

1. A very strict routine. This man will NOT let go of routine, and it is clear in 4x02 (Speak As Ye Chooses) where he states: "It's all very well saying 'At ease', but what do you do for the rest of the day?" and visible expression of shock and anger to finding out that a club was cancelled. As we come to the end of episode, where we see the man casually without his jacket on, he says "We've got forever" before immediately re-settling himself into his strict routine when being reminded of Film Club. But of course, this could be either that James is attracted to Captain America or is just reminded of his strict routine. This links into another point about change. In 3x05 (Something To Share?), this silly man agrees with Pat about how it is frightfully important to have an extremely strict routine. DON'T get me started on his almost coming out. (I will talk about this.)

2. Hyperfixations. This man has a hyperfixation/special interest in tanks, birds and basically anything remotely military related. He made a club solely dedicated FOR birds. He values his hyperfixations over secrets ("This is outrageous, I'll simply have to tell Fanny-" "No more war documentaries, then." "Your secret is safe with me, she'll have to kill me first- Well- You know what I mean."). 1x02, watching Hitler's Secret Superweapons "It's Christmas! I mean, it's Christmas Morning!" and when Mike turns it off... "What the bally heck do you think you are doing? Where the bally hell are the tanks?" "If you were dead, I would thrash your bottom, sir!". As like other autistic people, such as myself, taking away our hyperfixations isn't a good thing. We don't like that.

3. Masking/easily overwhelmed. (Basically what this deep dive is about). James is the true individual. The Captain is his mask, his shell. And he's been living in it for far too long now. He does not like change, and hates loud noises. This is clear when a club is cancelled in 4x02, and when he realizes the Queen's speech is televised in 2x07. He stress stims by using his swagger stick (Or Anthony's) and twirling it around in his fingers, he bounces a lot, he hums a lot, and whenever he matches about the place, he swings his arms depending on what arm the swagger stick is under (usually the right), and yes, I know that military marching is very exaggerating on the arms, but STILL, it's an output of energy that he does CONSTANTLY. I don't think I've seen anybody talk about the fact he hums. He does it SO MUCH.

4. Tone. Because of his ridiculous amount of gayness inside of him, this man cannot always understand straight jokes. 5x04, where they play Blankety Blank and he does not understand the word "saucy" (I mean, it is late 20th century/early 21st century slang...) and does not approve of the meaning. He gets jokes late, but that's alright because I do too.

ANYWAYS. Back to his pining.

In the first GIF, you see James check Adam out. This also happens in another scene with the quote "Do you find yourself to be distracted?" where he takes the moment to check Adam out yet again. In this second GIF, you see James slightly creep out when he realizes that he's openly saying he'll miss a man, with that look down, almost ashamed of himself.

But why does he fall for these men of order? Because it reminds him of Anthony, not because they're bossing everyone about - it's as if they're doing the bossing about for him, so he can relax and be himself. During Redding Weddy, we see Anthony order the unit around whilst James is looking outside the window (suppressing stims, but bouncing slightly on his feet) trying to spot Germans. I could see why James fell for Anthony. Despite everyone else, Anthony does not see these stims as annoying or his remarks to be unfunny. We see him SMILE when James makes a joke.

As we know, their love for each other was mutual.

He knew.

Anthony smiles after saying "James" and saying "I know". Why? He knew he was dying, he knew that James loved him, he knew why James was here. He wanted to be by James' side as he died to comfort him. To just be together, maybe once. Maybe twice. We don't know if they've held hands, kissed, but still. This is a very significant moment.

Additionally, Anthony's knowledge of James' intense crush is during their talk in James' office in Redding Weddy as it starts to reach a conclusion. Anthony subtly hints to the fact that if James should say anything, the moment is now ("Well, if that's all?").

He raises his eyebrow slightly, communicating to James that he is eager to hear what he really says, and that it's okay to be them because they're alone together. But no. The Captain completely hides James away. Anthony understands, he always has. The Captain probably hid James away because of Anthony's reaction to "I shall miss you, Havers." (his smile drops).

But... "I say, Havers?"

The way Anthony turns around. SO QUICK.

His smile. It's so ridiculously warm. But he knows because he saw that hesitancy, he saw James' sad expression. James is bally well sad that Anthony is leaving!!

Masking is clearly shown in this conversation. The Captain is preventing James from speaking the truth. And just like how he buried the limpet mine, he too, buried his feelings. And it became a ticking time bomb to Carpe Diem, where that emotional bomb finally explodes.

He leaves it to the last second. Literally. Let me show you proof.

Ben is absolutely AMAZING at micro-expressions, one of the many reasons I love to delve into The Captain so much. Carpe Diem (5x05) is an excellent example of some of the best James scenes.

Right here, what I am personally reading is that James is attempting to unmask, or is in the process of doing so. He deciding whether he should tell his story or not. This frame is important as it comes just after the quote "When I died, I never got to be surrounded by the people I loved." Blatant foreshadowing here because well, it shows that James loved Anthony and still does, despite it being 83 years since Anthony left of that year, he still holds him very dear to his heart. Of course, he has Anthony's swagger stick, which I love because he's always been there with James to help him out through moments. I love that and I love everything about that. How I ADORE Simon Hynd's directing here of the camera position, openly hinting to the fact that James died with Anthony next to him. God, everyone in that show is a mastermind!!

I also think that he is remembering here. Perhaps remembering the good memories? That Sunday afternoon stroll, or that certain Cricket Report? He's trying desperately to remember Anthony so he doesn't forget him when he moves on. For all he knows, he doesn't even know if Anthony thinks of him. All he knows is that he knew, and is most probably dead. He doesn't know what's beyond the veil. He doesn't know if he'll see Anthony. It's worth it.

This "desperate searching" facial expression is the same as the expression he had when glancing at the gate a few scenes prior to this, eyebrows furrowed and mouths slightly agape. It cuts to the gate, where we know, that in Redding Weddy, Havers walked out of. Anthony. Yet again, he's remembering him. James is obsessed with the memory of Anthony, the good times they had yet the good times they never were really good as laws about homosexuality were extremely strict. You could even say he is clingy.

Another thing is that, The Captain is one of the most favourite characters and people have been demanding to see how he died for ages! Why is it near the end of the last season? Well. I may have an idea to why it is in the last season.

James leaves things until the last second, he leaves the real explanation to things until it's too late. I saw someone on tiktok quote that James is as pretty as poppies because his love sprouts up in the wrong times and wrong places, which I think is amazing. I personally believe that his death was purposely the last one because you needed to see that he's more than just a stern WW2 CO with no feelings. He's an anxious man who's terrified of the real world so decides to seclude himself in a time and place where he was loved. World War 2. 1940. When Anthony loved him. We needed to see this inner secluded character within him to make the death sadder, which is what Ben likes, the silly man.

This also explains why he says "Is it? Is it, Alison?" during Redding Weddy because, well, with his mindset and attitude, he doesn't believe the war is over. He wasn't very good at keeping a unit of alive people under control, but perhaps he could try at keeping a whole bunch of dead people under control to keep himself busy from accepting the fact that Anthony is gone and he should emotionally move on.

In 4x04 (Gone Gone), the episode where Mary moves on, we see that James' coping mechanism is to keep himself busy. Keep himself busy so he doesn't have to focus on his feelings, but when he's given the time to pause and process it... He completely breaks down. Imagine that with Anthony when he left for North Africa.

But why does he like Pat?

Well. It isn't canon. But, the most recent Christmas special definitely hints at it. Pat introduced James to the amazing thing of baby talking, attempting to teach him just as Mia is put to bed. But once again The Captain's hard shell is back again and gives him a monotone voice and tone, rather making him seem like a robot. But at the end of the episode. He learned, and the glance he takes towards Pat is "Did I do it?" and Pat gives him a warm smile and a subtle nod. HUSBANDS I TELL YOU!

The Woodworm Men (3x03): Pat outbests The Captain with camping, yet they are still both very keen. The Captain trudged back though!! In this episode, James is awarded the teamwork badge from Pat, and when you see the scene, you can tell that he is smitten and in love. Because, now rewatching that scene with the context of his death, he must've been the happiest he had been in a while to achieve and properly earn a badge. James, I think, personally likes Pat because he still has all the leading roles (being a scout leader) and that reminds him a lot of Anthony hence why we see them working together in a lot of episodes (2x06, 2x02, etc). It all leads back to Anthony. Who knows what would've happened if they didn't meet.

I also think that Getting Out (1x06) is a good episode that represents self growth as well as debating with the issue of being mocked, as James is mocked in the episode.

This is him overhearing the conversation. Confusion. Anger. This episode is where James learns that not everybody will adapt themselves for him, not everybody will accept the way he acts. It's pretty clear that he cannot control this mindset he has, it was probably drilled into him, the poor soul. The way he brings himself back into the group is through a secret weapon (Kitty, because she's the most likeable and their relationship is mwah).

This episode is also important because of the scene in the library with James and Kitty.

"What matters more? Keeping Alison here, or letting her be happy?"

Now imagine that question but Anthony. James has sacrificed his life and soul towards Anthony, and even has a piece of him with him. This man is obsessed with Anthony. Crazily in love. He can't control his feelings for people. It just... Happens.

After Carpe Diem, it took me only a fraction of a second to see how comfortable he was. He was free to love who he wanted! I was stimming so crazily when the last scene of Season 5 (disregarding the Christmas special) was him being gay. Fanny comforted him after he came out, and every one supported him. He feels safe now.

The mirror and the draw in the intro.

Personally, I believe that the mirror represents the fact that his medals are the right way, meaning that the man in the mirror is The Captain and the man looking at his reflection is James. He's looking what he could've been. A hero. Yet now that he's come to terms with himself, James knows that he can be himself now. Free of judgement. Free of secluding himself away. I believe that the drawer represents him ever searching for more memories to grasp onto, more things about Anthony to remember. I also think it represents the fact that there is something inside of him that is worth looking for, and that thing deserves to be looked for and looked after. The draw is pulled out as far as it can go, so this could point to the fact that there is something buried within the house that needs to be found and given back to him. Could be the limpet mine. Or perhaps that William letter truly was a love letter.

OVERALL:

James is a different man to The Captain. The Captain is merely a costume or a nickname James wears knowing full well of the man he is underneath those perceived images of him. James is a coward. James is obsessed with Anthony. His heart has bled so much he has to rely on the small amount of attention from someone so he can carve it out and then offer it to those people who attention has been wasted on him. Ben is an amazing actor and writer who threads things together so subtly and sneakily it's insane. James won't let go of the military mindset, just incase he meets Anthony when he moves on. He thinks that no one will fall in love with the present him so he tries his best to act like his old self. Ben is right. You certainly are a fool, James. But oh, how I love your character.

[willbyersabyss]

What's your level of confidence in a Byler endgame and what evidence can you use to lead towards it?

I have 100% confidence in byler endgame.

Sorry this is longer than I expected, so evidence under here:

Like I said in this other post, the storytelling simply wouldn't make sense if byler was unreciprocated. There would be no reason to give Will feelings for Mike in the first place. If this were an unrequited love story, it would've concluded at the end of s3... maybe s4. They would've given Will a different love interest in California, which they alluded to at the beginning of s4 before settling for Mike again. They know how easy it would be to give him someone new. But they didn't. And they won't.

What's the point of giving Will an unrequited love arc? There is none. It gives Will something for Vecna to chew on? He already has plenty of trauma for that. They didn't know what to do with Will in s4? Sure, but why not explore how everyone is distancing themselves from Will? We could've had him feeling like an outsider because of his queerness and trauma once more, but the distance from Joyce, Jonathan, and Mike exacerbates it. He could just be afraid of losing his best friend because he's gay, not because of his feelings. The rain fight would factor into that. But no. That's not how it's written. He's in love with Mike.

"I'm not going to fall in love." And he did. It's not a crush, it's love. Will said himself that he'll always need Mike. That's not something he's going to get over on a random Tuesday. If this were unrequited, Will would have to move on. But he already admitted he can't. There is no satisfaction in rejection for his arc. It would do nothing but make him feel more ostracized and unaccepted. There's no lesson. It just confirms what he already believes: he won't find love because he's gay. He needs to be proven wrong.

There would be no reason for Mike to struggle with his relationship with El for two whole seasons, with Will being the only one he opens up to about it. Why can't they fix it on their own? Why does he need constant outside reassurance to understand his feelings for her?

Mike has a lot of insecurities and Will is the only one who helps him feel better about it. El makes it worse. El's struggles are also made worse because of Mike. They don't understand each other enough to help because they never try to understand. The one time they did, it ended in more misunderstanding. Then Will's confession "solved" this through... lies. Those weren't El's feelings. Why would someone else's feelings fix Mike and El's problems?

Even El's arc is fulfilled through their break up. Her story was never about romantic love. From the beginning, she's been longing for familial love. People think it would be unfair to El for them to break up, but romance was never needed for her arc in the way it is for Will. And Mike keeps trying to put El into a superhero box even though it goes AGAINST her entire self-identity arc. Mlvn's relationship does nothing for either character but set them back.

Byler endgame is the most fulfilling conclusion for Will, Mike, AND El.

[therainscene]

It’s funny that Bylers are so often accused of being delusional, because I was at my most delusional when I was anti-Byler.

I spent most of S4 refusing to acknowledge that Will had romantic feelings for Mike, despite knowing damn well what all that love triangle imagery and sad gay pining was implying. I convinced myself it was just bros before hoes drama; that perhaps Will wanted to come out to his best friend but felt nervous after six months of radio silence following “it’s not my fault you don’t like girls!”

The van scene forced me to accept that he really was in love, and it pissed me off because what was even the point of making him fall for a straight boy?

Mike’s bizarre “no homo” behaviour was clearly a symptom of growing up in a conservative 80s household, and witnessing Will’s sacrificial act of love in the van was the shitty lesson he needed to get over his homophobia.

I saw a typical straight male protagonist in an 80s coming-of-age film getting to coast his way to self-actualization on the back of queer suffering; a cruel and homophobic trope I thought we’d moved past by the year 2022.

But then the NINA reunion scene rolled around--

--and I immediately picked up on the heavy parallels between Mike and Will in how they greeted El. The realization hit me like a tonne of bricks: Mike feels the same way about her as Will does.

I thought, “wait, does this mean I was wrong about...? Oh my god. No way.

No fucking way.

Will was in love with El this whole time?? What the fuck, he’s been gay since S1 and she’s his sister this is BULLSHIT I will personally strangle the Duffers--”

Heteronormativity is a hell of a drug, kids.

Let this be a lesson to those of you who think media illiteracy is to blame for Byler denial -- how well someone understands the mechanics of storytelling is irrelevant if they insist on treating Mike’s supposed heterosexuality as an axiom instead of an evidence-based conclusion. The issue lies with bias, not literacy.

I was stubbornly anti-Byler because I knew I’d immediately fall in love with this ship if I allowed myself to have hope it could be canon, and the general state of queer rep in mainstream media meant I was all but guaranteed to get hurt if I was so stupid as to have hope. But in my desperation to cling to the “safe” heteronormative outcome, I only ended up hurting myself with my own silly assumptions.

We’ve seen both canonically gay characters in the show make exactly this mistake, needlessly hurting themselves with their silly but self-defensive assumptions about their love interests.

Stranger Things absolutely nails its depiction of the subtler ways internalized homophobia can manifest -- Will may feel like a mistake and be prone to beating himself up, but he isn’t some pitiful self-loathing queer who wishes he was straight, either. He’s just so crushed by heteronormativity that he accepts it as an inescapable fact of life and lets it guide his beliefs and actions.

Don’t get me wrong: Will, like Robin, is very sensible for being cautious in such a horrifically bigoted environment -- trying to openly defy that level of homophobia by yourself, especially when you’re young, is a bad idea.

But unlike Robin, he clearly struggles to accept that he has the right to chase his same-sex love interest. He's no longer simply exercising caution, but conforming to homophobic standards -- much in the same way I thought I was sensibly refusing to be queerbaited, when really I was just agreeing with the heteronormative status quo.

I realize now that this is the real reason Will was written into a homophobic 80s trope: not to teach Mike an outdated lesson in acceptance, but to maneuver Will into position for the lesson he’s going to learn in S5 about resisting conformity.

Will needs to learn that castrating himself to make straight people comfortable is a bad idea too. Not only is that a miserable way to live his life, but what sort of world is he leaving for the next generation of queer kids if he never questions these homophobic standards?

It’s just the cycle of abuse scaled up to the societal level.

This is what gives me confidence in Byler endgame. Queerness isn’t just an incidental element of Will’s personal arc, but suffuses the show to its very core -- it’s in its themes, its allegory, its characters.

So Will getting the boy isn’t just nice fan-service for Byler shippers, but a necessary ending if the show’s most important lesson is to land:

That it’s rewarding to make the difficult choice of standing up to bigotry in the face of forced conformity. Of choosing love.

Could it be the case that I was right the first time, and Stranger Things is going to turn out to be yet another heteronormative mainstream show that doesn’t commit to its own themes? Sure, maybe. But that wouldn’t invalidate the valuable lessons this show has already -- and apparently accidentally lol -- taught me.

Anyone who calls us deluded for hoping a mainstream show is going to have a gay pairing as its main couple just doesn’t realize -- or doesn’t care -- that they’re contributing to the very problem they’re describing.

[jadeylovesmarvelxo]

Hey There Jealousy.

You're part of Hellfire with a big crush on Eddie, he doesn't feel the same and you deal with unrequited feelings until a date with someone else triggers unexpected reactions. ✨

Warnings; Angst, jealousy, fighting, fluffy goodness. Not S4 compliant.

Please like or reblog, etc if you enjoyed this ❤️🌸

I don't give anyone permission to copy my work.

❤️❤️

You had been in Hellfire for the last two years, it was your senior year and things were going pretty great.

When you first joined the group you didn't know what to expect, Gareth was the one who had found out that you were a huge dnd fan and always played with the kids you were babysitting at the time.

One of them happened to be his younger cousin Dave who raved about you to Gareth, it was then decided you would tag along to Hellfire.

None of your friends could understand why you wanted to join but you ignored their doom-filled predictions of it being a cult or whatever bullshit they heard from Jason.

Eddie was hesitant at first until you played your first campaign and knocked everyone's expectations out of the water.

Now you were one of Eddie's valued teammates and the tiny itty bitty crush you had on Eddie when you first met? Now it was full-blown feelings and you were screwed.

Because he didn't think of you like that, he had crushes on Chrissy Cunningham, other cheerleaders, hookups with girls in bands and at The Hideout where he would play with his band Corroded Coffin.

It hurt, seeing him with those girls hurt, it was expected though. You were just his friend, he was older and in a cool band and despite what Jason and his Neanderthal friends thought and called him- "the freak" garnered a lot of intrigue.

He was also gorgeous, with beautiful brown doe eyes, shaggy brown hair, tattoos and dimples. Eddie was fucking hot.

So yeah, you were screwed.

❤️❤️

Dustin never thought he would be speaking one and one with Chrissy Cunningham. He knew you were friends with her and Eddie a little bit too but it still felt surreal.

You and Eddie. That was the reason the two of them were conspiring together in the first place.

"Look, I like Eddie, he's a sweet guy but the fact that he doesn't notice how gone my girl is for him is frustrating" Dustin nods.

"What do you want to do about it? If he's not interested then you can't force him to be Chrissy" she nods.

"I know. Eddie Munson despite what yn seems to think isn't the only guy in the whole universe, others have noticed how cute she is"

This intrigues Dustin. Was it Steve? He knew Steve thought you were hot.

"You know Matt? He's on the basketball team? One of Jason's friends. He's one of them" Dustins eyes widen.

"So what do you suggest we do?" Chrissy smiles.

"We don't have to do anything. Matt is going to ask her out. Either Eddie feels something or he doesn't, either way..."

Either way, you would either get your dream guy or a chance to move on for good. Dustin liked you a lot and wanted you to find happiness, whether it was with Eddie, Matt or whoever you wanted to be with.

He was nervous but ready to see what happened.

❤️❤️

"Hey" You're shocked into silence as Matt comes over, he's like one of the most popular guys in school besides Jason and yeah you're meant to be tutoring him tonight but you didn't expect him to want to hang out beyond that.

Did he want to hang out with Hellfire? Immediately you notice Eddie tense, defences up and you don't blame him, the basketball team has a few jerks in it.

Besides Lucas of course. You adored Lucas as well as Mike and Dustin.

Matt has never been hostile though so you smile encouragingly while Eddie glares at the newcomer.

"Hey, I know we were meant to be studying tonight but I saw on your bag that you like horror movies, there's a showing of some classic horror movies tonight. You wanna go?"

Okay, this you weren't expecting. He rests his hand on your arm and his thumb strokes over your shoulder, it tingles and you feel flustered and also acutely aware of Eddie's raised eyebrow as he watches you both.

Chrissy is watching too giving you a thumbs-up gesture and you make a decision.

"I'd love to" you find yourself saying and Matt grins.

"Cool, I'll see you after class" You watch him go feeling like you're in some strange dream.

"Did that really just happen?" you ask the others who look between you and then Eddie.

"You've been swayed to the dark side. Yeah, it did" Eddie huffs and you roll your eyes.

"I have not. He is cute though" You sigh dreamily, it's nice having someone notice you.

"He was all over you in Ms O'Donnell's class. Someone's got a crush" Jeff teases and the others join in on the light hearted teasing.

Except for Eddie, who's quiet and munching on a bag of pretzels while he glares in the direction of the Jock table.

"We were just talking, he was asking me for help studying. I help Eddie so why not?" Gareth grins.

"Mmm and now you're off to the movies, a horror movie. That you'll not be watching because of all the... He makes a kissy face and you giggle.

"Dingus" would that happen though? Your belly flutters.

"Shut up! " Eddie snaps and the others quieten and your heart rate spikes because he looks so annoyed and you wonder if it's about you and Matt.

"We were discussing the campaign" he points out and your heart sinks, right Hellfire. It was silly of you to think he might be jealous. Why would he be?

After school, you meet up with Matt to head to the cinema.

Maybe this will be a good thing and you will be able to finally move on from Eddie?

❤️❤️

Eddie was invited to tag along with Robin and Steve to see The Blob.

How was he supposed to know that you would be at this movie with Matt? He felt like an idiot for staying and semi-spying on your date.

He tried to leave but the harsh twist of his heart when you laughed at Matt's jokes kept him rooted to the spot as well as Steve and Robin who wanted to see the movie.

Eddie didn't know why the sight of you and Matt together made his stomach bottom out but he was beginning to get a good idea.

He couldn't concentrate on the movie. It felt like that time that you were crushing on Steve for weeks and that kick started Eddie's dislike of the dude.

Until he got to know him and realized he was a pretty cool guy, Dustin's hero-worshipping of Steve too had stuck in his brain.

"Dude you didn't tell me that yn was looking to date someone. Could have asked her myself" Steve nudges him and nods to you and Matt.

Wait so Steve liked you as well? The urge to dislike Steve comes racing back. He kinda wants to hit something.

"You like her?" he asks Steve who shrugs.

"Dude, she's hot. You've never noticed?" he thinks about this and he's always known that you're beautiful, he's never liked anyone noticing you but assumed it was just him being protective.

Eddie doesn't think the pain in his chest could get any worse until Matt kisses you and he finally understands what it feels like to get his heart ripped out.

Stumbling out of the cinema he's joined by Robin and Steve, he feels like he can't breathe and the image of Matt kissing you won't go away.

"What's wrong with him?" Robin panics and Steve pats his back.

"Think he just realised he's in love Robin"

Love? he was in love with you? At first, he's like when the fuck did that happen.

Then be thought about it and maybe it was every time you smiled or you laughed or when you would fall asleep on his bed after helping him study and look so beautiful he was mesmerized.

Maybe it was your kindness, the way you played a kickass game of Hellfire or the way you looked at him on nights when it was just the two of you in his bedroom while he strummed on the guitar and taught you how to play.

Jesus Christ, he was an idiot.

❤️❤️

Eddie had been weird for the whole week and that was all you could think about tonight.

Your date with Matt had turned into a second and now this third date.

It was nice you kept telling yourself along with the fact that Matt was a lovely guy.

That's why you were at this party instead of at Hellfire, though you'd rather be with the boys and Erica in the middle of a campaign.

Despite Chrissy being here which made you feel more relaxed you knew this wasn't your thing at all.

It didn't help that after half an hour Matt was already drunk and he kept trying to feel you up even you told him no.

Your good opinion of him was rapidly fading with him acting more and more like a douche bag.

You had said no three times now and you were pissed.

"Come on babe" you shake your head and when he almost knocks you over and you hit your side on the table creating a rip in your dress you decide you've had enough of the party.

And of Matt.

"I said no! God, we are so done" You snap and tug out of his arms, you ignore him and stalk away, you're so upset that you don't realise how far you've walked into the woods until you can't hear anything from the party.

Shit.

❤️❤️

You hadn't shown up for Hellfire and that was Eddie's first distraction of the night, many more were to come but this was the first and all he could think about was you with Matt.

Jealousy coils around his gut and once again he curses his stupidity for not realizing his feelings sooner. It made him pissed off, it was hard to concentrate and he wasn't happy.

Eddie startles out of his DM mode as Lucas comes running into the drama room, he's just about to unload on him for missing half an hour of Hellfire but the look on his face stops him.

"Sinclair what's wrong?'' that's when Lucas tells him you were at a party with Matt, he's drunk and you're missing.

Then Chrissy comes in and rushes over to Dustin, it's like he's in some episode of the Twilight Zone.

"Dustin! Big mistake with Matt, he's an asshole he kept trying to grope yn at the party and she left and I can't find her" Chrissy was panicking and Dustin looks to Eddie freaked out.

Trying to tamper down the thoughts of beating the shit out of Matt he assures Chrissy, Dustin and Lucas that he will find you.

"Jordan said that she ran into the woods, Eddie" Lucas tells him and Eddie high-tails it to his van.

He had to find you. It was starting to rain and you could get sick or anything. What if you got lost? What if you tripped and injured yourself or you... He freezes.

What if the monster that stalked Hawkins Woods got to you? Normally he would have said that it was a load of rumours and shit but everyone knew Hawkins was one strange little town.

All the deaths. He couldn't risk you being hurt and he drove even faster. Desperate to get to you.

❤️❤️

You're shivering and chilled to the bone but you manage to find a clearing in the woods that leads back to the party.

It feels like you've been lost for hours but it probably hasn't been that long and you're relieved when you see a bunch of parties goers

That's when you also see Eddie, flashlight in hand and he shouts your name in relief.

He runs to you and you stumble into his arms sobbing in relief. The feeling of familiarity of Eddie's arms around you immediately makes you feel safe.

"It's okay princess. I've got you, you're safe" he checks you over and you assure him you're fine.

"You're soaked and look at all the rips on your clothes," he says worriedly and shrugs off his jacket placing it around you. The rain is fiercer now, a storm is brewing and you look anxiously at him.

He will catch a cold just standing in his Hellfire shirt and jeans, you try to tell him that but he stubbornely refuses to take his jacket back.

"Chrissy and Lucas explained everything. If I see that douchebag Matt he better run the other way" Eddie seethes, you've never seen him this angry before. It's not like him.

Well, that's a lie you tell yourself as you know how protective he is of you. How many scrapes he's gotten himself in for you, even if he had no chance in winning, he would defend you.

Even when he knew you could take care of yourself he still protected you.

At that point, possibly in the worst timing ever Matt stumbles over to you.

Eddie stiffens and Matt glares at you.

"You finally decided to have a go after all huh? Instead of acting like a frigid bit... He didn't get a chance to finish that sentence as Eddie socked him in the mouth.

He wines flexing his hand which is now bruised and sore.

"Fucking worth it" he announces, puts his arm around you and leads you to the van.

❤️❤️

You had never been so glad to see Eddie's Uncle Wayne in your life. He takes in the rips on your outfit and the bruise on your arm and scowls.

"What boy is my nephew beating up this time honey?" you would smile if you weren't so cold.

Eddie comes in and you immediately take his hands in yours and inspect his bruised knuckles.

"Are you okay?" you ask him and he nods still looking pissed off. He softens as you clean and bandage up the knuckles.

"Never mind me, sweetheart. Are you okay?" he asks you and you nod still a bit shivery. Uncle Wayne gets you a blanket and you cuddle into it.

"I'm better now. Should have never gone to that party. The whole time I was there I just wanted to be at Hellfire but I thought Matt was a nice guy and wanted to stick around for a bit, then he got drunk and acted like a dick"

Tears fall down your cheeks, frustration and just total exhaustion from the night's events.

Eddie deftly leads you to his room and shuts the door. Once you are inside he holds you close to him.

"I thought I had found a great guy and that he liked me when all he wanted to do was get in my pants. He didn't want to get to know me, not really" Eddie rubs your arm soothingly

"Maybe the next guy will be better huh?" you say hopefully and Eddie goes still which confused you.

"Eddie?" he swallows as he stares at you and you clasp his hand in yours.

"I don't want there to be another guy sweetheart. I want there to be just one guy. I want to be that guy"

What? He continues speaking and you can't believe what's happening.

"I know it took forever for me to realise and I've been so fucking jealous all week of Matt because he doesn't get how special and kind and beautiful you are and how lucky he was to be with you and the dude messed it up? What a douchebag"

"Eddie," you say again and he looks at you with those pretty brown eyes all wide and nervous.

"You don't feel the same right? Shit, forget I said anything and.." you call his name again and this time he quietens.

"Kiss me" He doesn't need to be told twice his lips are on yours and he grins as you kiss him back, he pulls away briefly.

"I'm sorry I didn't realise sooner princess" You rest your head on his chest as he pulls you into a hug, arms wrapped tightly around you as you sit on his knee.

"Hey less apologizing and more kisses" He laughs and kisses you again, his thumb stroking your cheek as he presses tender kisses to your lips.

"I'm an idiot. Should have been kissing you like this for weeks, feels so good sweetheart, it's never felt like this, just so right"

You smile on cloud nine knowing what he means, kissing Matt while nice and all never felt like this. However all thoughts are wiped from your mind when you straddle Eddie and his breathy moans cause the ache in your core to deepen.

"I love you and I'm gonna be kissing you forever sweetheart, hope you know that," he tells you and the thought of forever with the man you love sounds heavenly.

"I love you Eds, and that sounds perfect to me"

❤️

[queenie-ofthe-void]

pre-S4 Robin and Max || wc: ~1.6k || rating: teen || cws: depression, brief mentions of bullying and child neglect

~~~

Robin drops her lunch tray onto the table, falling into the seat with purpose. The young girl across from her startles at the movement. Pulling her headphones down slightly, Max raises her eyebrow in question, clearly annoyed at the unwelcomed company. Robin mimics the look in an overly dramatic way, and takes a large bite of her instant mashed potatoes. 

When Max only rolls her eyes and goes back to her homework– headphones off– Robin considers it a win. The girl’s been pulling away since Starcourt, drawing into herself in a way that’s putting everyone on edge, and the Party is at a loss for what to do. 

The beginning of freshman year was tough on all of the kids, but especially Max. Robin would eye her from across the lunchroom, seated at the opposite end of the table from the loud, brash, super super senior along with the rest of the Party and Hellfire boys. The poor girl would startle anytime Munson laughed too harshly and flinched at the loud bang of his fists on the table, shrinking into herself during his tabletop tirades. 

Needless to say, sitting with the Hellfire boys didn’t last long. Max’s patience for Eddie thinned even further after settling into the trailer across from him, complaining about music keeping her up at all hours of the night– the same electric guitar riffs over and over again. And she’d made more than one off-hand sarcastic remark about Munson’s late night customers causing the dog to howl at all hours of the night.

Robin looks towards the Hellfire table now. Sure enough, Eddie’s flailing his arms around in what is most likely a lecture on The Man. Dustin’s wide eyes and Mike’s entranced smile tell her they’re fully proselytized to the Munson Doctrine now, after a full five months of brain washing. Hopeless, the both of them. She has no idea what they see in the town drug dealer beyond D&D. Mike didn’t even like rock music before he joined Hellfire. Now he’s subconsciously crushing so hard on their fearless leader that he’s starting to dress like him. 

She supposes she’d be a bit of a hypocrite to judge him too harshly though. She only joined the pep band to see Vickie after school.

Cutting off her own dating anxieties, she focuses back on Max. The young girl is more relaxed than when Robin first sat down. She’s hunched over an old copy of Romeo and Juliet. Not one of Robin’s personal favorites, and she’d guess not one of Max’s either if her frustrated huff means anything. Why it’s required reading for freshmen she’ll never understand. But speaking of Romeo…

She looks around again, and her eyes lock on to Lucas’s. He’s staring directly at her with a desperate look in his eye that Robin tries to acquiesce with a tight smile. Another boy in a letterman jacket is trying to get his attention, but he’s shrugged off as Lucas moves to stand. 

Panicked, Robin checks to see that Max hasn’t noticed and shakes her head. A silent plea to not ruin the small ground she’s gained-- the first ground anyone has gained with Max in weeks. Hurt flashes across his face, but he sits down. Robin nods, hopefully telegraphing her thoughts. She can tell he's not happy about it, but he settles back into the conversation with his teammates.

Max dumped him just before Halloween and just shortly after she quit sitting with the Hellfire boys. Lucas had tried sitting with her instead, but the older boys stomped their proverbial toddler feet, arguing that he was already splitting too much of his time between D&D and basketball practice. They couldn’t believe he then had the audacity to spend even less time with them just to hang with some girl.

Needless to say Mike and Dustin had been less than supportive, caving to the peer pressure from the older members and Robin knows it’s one of the reasons why Lucas eventually ended up sitting with his teammates.

Then her mom started pulling doubles during the holidays and Max did her best to hole up in the trailer, refusing to come out no matter how much caroling the boys tried. Robin understands why Max wouldn’t want to go to the Party’s holiday gatherings. The boys were the core unit of the group, backed up by the Wheeler and Byers families. But the Byers’ left and took her best friend with them, the boys were fighting, and they weren’t even sure if Lucas would show up if Max wasn’t there. Robin was one of the few people involved in the Upside-Down bullshit who understood what isolation from the core group felt like, so why not try to include Max in their own tiny group of three.

A few days later, on the coldest day of break, Robin sat in the passenger seat with her fingers smashed up against the beemer’s heat vent and watched out the window as Max opened the door for the only person she was still talking to. The girl put up an argument, but no one can out-bitch The King himself. She let him in and they stepped out a few minutes later, a bag slung over her shoulder and a small dog in her arms. He never complained, even when the house smelled like wet dog for a week later.

Now it’s almost March, and it’s been weeks since she’s talked to anyone. She’s been sitting alone everyday, not answering the phone. So maybe it's Robin's turn to try talking with her, girl to girl.

“I know what you’re doing here,” Max states, hiding her hesitancy under a false bravado, the casual air of her tone undercut by her shifting gaze. “You can tell him to stop worrying, I’m fine.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Random Girl,” Robin answers with an innocent wave of her hand.

Max’s deadpanned stare says she’s not buying it. The nickname all but confirms her motives. 

That’s fine, Robin just needs a foot in the door and now that Max has opened said door, it’s like the dam between Robin's brain and mouth has burst. 

“I was just sitting here eating my lunch and minding my own business, when you decided to say something. And honestly, I think that’s pretty good for me considering I’ve been sitting here for almost twenty minutes in complete silence, which– you know– is not really my forte. Normally I like when people talk to me, it’s how conversations are supposed to work, ya know? But when it’s just me I can’t seem to stop and I’ll, like, keep going and going until it gets awkward.”

She can’t stop rambling and oh god she’s going to ruin this, she’s sure of it. Max let her sit here and now she’s going to ruin this for Lucas and the boys and–

“Just,” Max interrupts. Robin takes a deep breath, in and out. Calming herself down and keeping her mouth shut. “You can sit here, alright. But don’t, like, expect anything from me. You’re not going to get me to open up, or some shit– don’t even say language right now Robin I swear– so that you can report back on how I’m doing. Because I’m fine. Really.”

“Why would I report back to Lucas how you’re doing–” Robin starts. But Max interrupts again.

“You know that’s not who I’m talking about,” Max says quietly. Her eyes are turned downward, avoiding eye contact now that the fire’s burned out.

“Max,” Robin tries again, yet doesn’t know what to say. Anything she says will either be a lie, or so genuinely truthful Max might withdraw again. 

“Max, I just want to sit here. Ok? I promise I won’t jump in the beemer after school and spill all your secrets. We don’t even have to talk if you don’t want to! I’ll just sit over here and do homework, while you sit over there and do homework. Because Nancy’s busy with the newspaper now and maybe I can help you with Spanish and just--,” but she stops. She has to be honest. Or at least try without it being too much.

Max is looking at her. Watching intently, searching for something Robin can’t figure out.

She sighs, exhausted but unwilling to give up.

“He’s worried about you. Of course he is. That’s, like, Steve’s whole entire personality.” It gets the small smile out of Max that she was trying for. “But I’m sitting here because I want to, not because he told me to or so I could, I don’t know, gather information for him. Talk to me or not, but I’m sitting here for lunch from now on.”

Max eyes Robin, and must find whatever she was looking for. 

The bell rings, and they both move to pack up their books. “If you’re sitting here,” Max says “then you’re going to have to listen to me gush about Kate Bush.”

Like that’s a deterrent. Hell, it’s an incentive.

“Fine,” Robin makes a show of it, whining and rolling her eyes. “Then you’re going to have to get over it and listen to me bitch about Steve being a dingus and a total loser when it comes to picking up girls at work. I spend too much time with him to not get it off my chest.”

“Totally understandable,” Max says, a huff of laughter escaping behind her restrained smile. “See you tomorrow then.”

Robin turns, bouncing lightly on her feet to her next class after a successful mission. Steve might not have asked her to do this, but she’s doing it for him regardless. For both Steve and Max. 

She can’t wait to tell him all about it.

~~~

@devondespresso thanks for the WIP ask! I've actually been sitting on this for a while, so you gave me a good kick in the ass to finally finish up edits and post. 💜💜💜

[tortillamastersblog]

♕ No Matter What - Part 16 | Lena Luthor ♕

Pairing: Lena Luthor x reader

Warnings: mentions of injuries and slight angst

Summary: Lena is still a no-show. . .

Previous Part | Next Part | Masterlist

________________________________________________

“Good, you’re doing great. Just one more step,” Dr. Mike encourages, holding my left hand as I walk on unstable legs.

My right hand is wrapped so tightly around the bar mounted to the wall that my knuckles have turned white.

I take the last step before lowering myself into the waiting wheelchair. My hands are shaking and I’m breathing heavily as Doctor Mike crouches down by my side with a beaming smile.

“That was amazing, Y/N,” he says. “If you keep working hard and doing your exercises you’ll be almost as good as new in no time.”

I try my best to smile, but even without the pitiful look on Doctor Mike’s face that follows it I know it wasn’t very convincing.

Ever since we dialed back my pain meds my entire left leg has been tingling and is weak. Sometimes it feels like an electric shock runs through it, all the way from my hip and down to my toes, and Doctor Mike says that even though the weakness will get better, the nerve pain will never truly go away.

Yes, it will also get better, but I won’t ever have physiological sensibility and mobility again.

“Why don’t we get you back to your room, you look tired,” he states rather than asks when I don’t comment on anything that he’s said.

I mumble please and hang my head low when he begins pushing me out of the pt room and back to my own room.

It’s been almost three weeks since what happened and I’ve honestly never felt this empty.

Don’t get me wrong, I was absolutely crushed and numb after Noah was killed, but now there’s just so many things weighing me down that I don’t know if I’ll ever come out on the other side of things again.

To start things off, I’m constantly having nightmares about what happened with Lex. They’re mostly about what actually happened but sometimes they’re also about Lena, Sam, or Ruby getting shot.

Then there’s the whole situation with my dad. He hasn’t visited me since that one time where he tried to apologize, and I’ve been racking my brain ever since if I have it in my heart to forgive him.

There’s also the nerve damage on my lower spine which turned out to be worse than expected. I’m not paralyzed — something I apparently came very close to— but my left leg is basically useless at the moment and the constant physical therapy is painful and exhausting.

And to top it all off, Lena hasn’t visited me even once since I got here. I also can’t get ahold of her on my phone because Lex destroyed it and I have yet to get a new one.

No one’s heard from her. The news outlets are dying for a comment from her about Lex’s and all her friends — Sam obviously included— can’t reach her either.

She’s not at home, apparently, which worries me, but it’s not like I can just walk out of this hospital and go look for her myself.

The only thing that gives me a little peace of mind is the fact that she texted Sam the day I was shot that she had to deal with some stuff and that she wouldn’t be available for some time.

When I first heard about it I was very worried because I know she blames herself for what happened, but then as time went on, I started to hate her for abandoning me.

Now, though, I’m just sad and dejected.

Do I really mean that little to her? I mean, even if she does blame herself, I thought her worry would outweigh her guilt eventually and she’d visit me, but apparently not. . .

Doctor Mike drops me off in my room, making sure I’m comfortable in the bed before leaving with an encouraging smile.

I sigh and close my eyes, only to open them again a couple minutes later when Sam and Ruby stop by.

They’ve been visiting me every day and even though I’m absolutely miserable and can’t wait to get out of here, they’ve been a reliable support system and always managed to cheer me up, even if it’s just a tiny bit.

Sam kisses my cheek in greeting and Ruby hugs me before pulling a deck of UNO cards out of her mom’s purse.

“Can we play?” she asks with a hopeful grin and I pat the space on the bed next to me with a nod.

We’ve been playing this game for a week now and at first ai thought I’d get tired of it, but that has yet to happen. I love playing with the two of them, especially when Ruby giggles after putting down a draw four card.

“Of course, c’mere.”

Sam takes a seat on the chair next to the bed while Ruby settles in next to me. She shuffles the cards and hands them out as Sam tells me about her day at the office.

“. . . and then Marcus has the nerve to burst right into my office,” Sam concludes once Ruby has passed out enough cards. “Can you believe that?!”

I chuckle and shake my head, sorting my cards and fanning them out in my left hand. “I honestly don’t know why you haven’t fired him yet.”

Sam huffs and puts down the first card, a red four. “Yeah, me neither.”

We play a couple of rounds, chatting about God knows what until Ruby decides she’s had enough and that she wants a hot chocolate from the hospital’s cafeteria.

Sam hands her some cash and we both watch her leave before Sam turns back to me with a serious expression.

“Okay, out with it,” she says, moving her chair closer to the bed. “You’ve been awfully quiet lately and I know it’s not just because of Lena.”

Immediately my eyes start stinging with tears and I gulp, trying to force them away. When Sam grabs my hand and squeezes it however, there’s no stopping them anymore and within seconds my cheeks are wet and my chin is wobbling.

“I just— I can’t anymore, Sam,” I admit with a hiccup. “I’m exhausted and-and everything around me reminds me of everything bad that’s ever happened to me.”

I use my free hand to wipe away my tears, but it’s of no use because they just keep coming and there’s nothing I can do about it as everything I’ve been holding back for almost three weeks now bubbles out of me.

“I can’t stand walking past Noah’s favorite coffee shop every morning. I hate seeing my dad’s favorite local beer in bars and I hate all the reporters outside the hospital just waiting for me to talk about Lex,” I whisper, not daring to look at Sam. “It’s too much. . .”

It’s silent for a moment until Sam’s soft touch on my cheek makes my breath hitch. She uses her free hand to wipe away some more of my tears and when I look up to meet her eyes all I can see is sympathy and understanding.

“It’s okay, Y/N,” she says quietly. “I understand what you mean and I think it’s high time you got away from all of this for a while.”

I take a shuddering breath and squeeze her hand. “You’re saying I should leave?”

She nods. “Yes. You could travel and explore the world, or you could just move somewhere else for a couple of years, you know?”

I don’t want to travel. I’ve seen enough of the world for now, having been stationed in a couple of countries while I was in the Army.

The thought of moving, however, makes me pause and think for a second.

It would be a great opportunity to start over, start on a blank slate, and if I ever get homesick I can always just move back to National City.

“But what about you and Ruby?“ I ask. I’ve always been there for them and they’ve always been there for me, too. I can’t just leave them behind and start a new life somewhere.

“We’ll be fine,” Sam assures me with a watery smile. “We’ll always stay in touch, but it’s time for you to start living again, Y/N, rather than just existing.”

“Sammy. . .” I trail off, not exactly knowing what to say. I’m overwhelmed by her understanding and her support, but I’m also sad at the prospect of being away from her and Ruby.

“It’s okay,” she says. “You’ll be okay, and Ruby and I will be okay, too.”

I squeeze her hand again and close my eyes for a second, letting what happened just now sink in.

“I love you, Sammy,” I whisper when I open my eyes again.

Sam sniffles and blinks away some of her own tears. “I love you, too.”

I chuckle and press a kiss to her knuckles right as Ruby returns from the cafeteria. She doesn’t notice our tear stained faces and wordlessly joins me on the bed again, sipping hot chocolate from her paper cup.

She starts babbling about her day at school which makes me smile softly. Every so often Sam’s gaze meets mine and the unrelenting understanding in her eyes puts my mind at ease.

I’m going to be okay, I think, but the question of Lena’s whereabouts and what she’s up to still gnaws at the back of my mind.

It’s been a week since I decided to move and an old friend of Sam’s told her about an apartment he’s just finished remodeling in Metropolis that I can move into at any time.

It’s a big step, moving to the other end of the country, but it will give me the space I so desperately need.

I was released from the hospital two days ago and have since been packing most of my stuff and getting my affairs in order.

I have to take it easy because I’m still recovering, which is why I’m only packing light things like clothes. The rest will be taken care of by a moving company that I’ve hired to start tomorrow.

My left leg is still weak and tingles, but the shooting pains have stopped and all my other injuries have healed nicely.

I have to use a crutch for the time being because I’m still a little unstable on my feet, but Doctor Mike told me that I won’t be needing it soon enough if I continue to do the exercises the physical therapist showed me.

So far the only people who know that I’m moving are Sam and Harper. The latter found out because she was there when Sam called me about the apartment, but she swore not to tell my parents about it.

We’re almost back to where we were before Noah’s death since she, not unlike Sam and Ruby, also visited me in the hospital daily, but it will still take some time for our friendship to be fully restored.

Now, as for my parents, I’ve decided not to tell them about moving until I’m already settled in Metropolis. If I told them now they’d try to stop me from going because they’re both trying to make things right with me, but I can’t start healing if I don’t get some space.

I’ve come to the conclusion that I will never be able to forgive either of them for what they did to me, especially not my dad, but I can see myself being civil with them in time.

A knock on the door makes me pause and drop the stack of clothes I was just about to put into a box onto the bed.

It’s almost dinner time and Sam was planning on coming over with some pizza, so I think nothing of it when I open the door with a lazy smile, but then I freeze when my eyes land on the one person I’ve been yearning to see for almost a month now.

“Lena,” I whisper, taking in her red nose and the snowflakes in her dark hair.

“Hi.” Her voice is just as quiet as mine, if not even quieter, and when her green eyes meet mine in silent question, I step aside and let her into the apartment.

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I’m sorry it’s a bit short, but the next part (probably the final part) will definitely be longer.

*Not proofread yet

Tag list: @nerethos @orange15quote @nuianced-tck-enby @autorasexy @unexpected-character @nothisismax @wandatasha @likeornella @rosea-reginae @aca-biitch @jujuu23

[joeys-babe]

Joey B Imagines: Ruin My Life

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summary: Joe falls for someone he probably shouldn’t fall for.

warnings: none

pairing: joe burrow x reader

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(joe’s pov)

she was beautiful.

y/n Brown, the granddaughter of Mike Brown.

I watched her from afar, knowing I could never act on the crush I’d gained on her over the years just because her grandpa owned the team.

it started my rookie year. I noticed this extremely attractive girl, who looked to be around the same age as me, sitting in a golf cart next to Mike one day at practice. she was sitting on her phone and not even paying attention to the practice. I was too nervous to approach her after being told she was the owner's granddaughter so I stayed watching her from three fields over, taking longing glances during water breaks, looking over at her after I made a good play just to see if she had seen it too.

it was stupid of me to think she’d ever talk to me, the only time she did was after my knee injury. still yet, her just asking “Hey, you doing better?” or “how’s your knee today?” in the hallway of the facility only made my crush worse.

all the guys noticed. Ja’marr and Sam teased me about it, finding the fact that I’d still had the crush a year later.

when we won the AFC Championship in 2022, we were celebrating in the locker room when y/n came striding up to me wearing a grin on her face and a championship hat matching mine.

“hey, champ! you did great out there, and I’m proud of how far you’ve come this season. I know last year was hard for you but you’ve come back better than ever. I look up to you, Joe.” - you smiled

“thank you, y/n. it means a lot to hear you say that.” - Joe

she moved to hug me but I stopped her.

“I’m like really sweaty, I probably stink.” - Joe

“I don’t care!” - you hugged him

when she pulled away from me, her arms were still around my waist as mine were around hers.

“Do you really hug all your grandpa's players like this?” - Joe

“not really. just my favorites.” - you grinned

“I’m a favorite?” - Joe laughed

“you are my favorite.” - you

“why’s that?” - joe

“mm, you’re the sweetest player, most genuine, cocky in only good ways, you’ve got the most heartwarming smile, and not to mention the fact you’re extremely cute.” - you

“you know we can’t do this y/n…” - joe

“why not? I’ve seen the way you’ve looked at me since you were drafted here. I like you too, and I really want to get to know you better. I want to see you outside of these walls, I can’t settle for you just being my hallway crush.” - you

“I don’t want to just be your hallway crush either, and I don’t want you to just be mine.. but you’re grandpa..” - Joe

“who cares what he thinks! he raves about you and how you’re the center of this team, if he changes that just because of me then that’s poor judgment on his part. I trust the fact he wants this team to succeed, and they need you to do that.” - you

“you have a way with words..” - Joe

“there’s more where that came from. maybe if we get to know each other better, you can find that out for yourself.” - you smiled

“I plan on it, y/n.” - Joe

y/n looked around to examine the room, the rest of the locker room was celebrating farther away from my corner of and they weren’t paying attention to us. She turned back to me and got on her tiptoes to kiss my cheek.

“congrats on the win, Joey.” - you

“thank you.” - Joe

I was gonna reciprocate the kiss on the cheek before a familiar voice called y/n’s name.

“y/n!” - Mike

“shit, that’s my grandpa. he’s probably looking for me so I gotta go. before I do though, here’s my number. text me okay?” - you

“i will.” - joe

you guys didn’t know, but mike had watched the whole intereaction. he wasn’t mad at all, he was more upset that you both felt the need to hide the fact that you guys liked each other from him. Mike thought Joe was a good person and an even better leader. he had the perfect traits to be a good boyfriend, and he trusted you to do what made your heart happy.

you had found your grandpa just outside the locker room on the golf cart to take you back to your car.

“you okay, pumpkin? you seem flustered.” - Mike

“I’m good, better than I have been in a while actually.” - you

“I’m glad. it’s because of Burrow right?” - Mike

you opened your mouth ready to defend yourself as your eyes went wide, but before you could squeak an excuse out your grandpa stopped you.

“I’m not mad, y/n. Joe’s a good kid, and if he makes you happy then I’m happy. you know what I always tell you...” - Mike

“follow your heart.” - you

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authors note: this is part 1 to a little tumblr mini series im gonna do!! 😁😁

hope you enjoyed! ❤️