#might start dropping them for his bday week
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i have a bunch of silly lil self indulgent blurbs with kuroo that i kinda wanna post but also ā¦ The Horrorsā¢ļø
#why is it so scary#also are yāall sick of me yet#i feel like i canāt shut up about tetsu or zoro for that matter#and i prob wonāt be able to for awhile either#so !!#soz š#thinking & thunking ā¦.#might start dropping them for his bday week#so iām sorry if i spam a lil š#āĖā¹ į° xoxo aims
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Happy Birthday!
Relations: Ayato, Albedo, Alhaitham, Aether, Childe, Cyno, Scaramouche/Wanderer x Gender Neutral Reader (separate obv )
Warnings: uhm slight angst, swearing, too much fluff ew (aw), forgetting abt ur birthday (literally all of them do)
support me on kofi!! link is on master list (pinned post)
Ayato:
-Iāll be so fucking supercalfraglicious rn, that man wonāt even be able to spend it with you.
-Yoimiya and Ayaka def bet 10$ he forgets acc
-but because Iām SUCH a sucker for angst to fluff
-In the morning, he wonāt even know what day it is. Heāll be to tired to comprehend anything. Heās not a morning person in the slightest
-He does wake up before you though due to the work, so youāll still be asleep while he greats ready and gives ur forehead a lil smooch before he heads out to do any tasks or duties
-youāll wake up upset to see NO GIFT LIKE WTF
-richest man in Inazuma CANT even get u anything ?!
-maybe he left it for thoma so he can give it to you when you wake up!!
-when you go eat breakfast, ur eyes light up to see thoma holding a gift but slightly dim when itās none other than his and not your beloveds.
-nonetheless your happy you got a gift !!
-itāll be a few hours and STILL no gift. Thoma tells you with a sad dog pout face that Ayato did forget
-so you actually spend the day with him!!! thoma >>>>>
-your back in the evening, signs of daylight all gone as night was to hit
-when ur back you fully come to terms Ayato did forget about your birthday because he didnāt even wish you a happy bday :)
-you walk past him sitting on the bed with a few bags of stuff you liked that Thoma bought as another gift and Ayato looked at you confused
āWho bought you all of that?ā He asked, sitting up and setting a few work files down on the bed.
āThoma.ā You answered, not even sparing him a glance.
āConfusion grew more along with a tinge of jealousy. āWhat was the occasion?ā
āMy birthday.ā
-Iām telling u rn any type of emotion DROPS
-he lowkey might start crying
-hell ask u to sit on the bed and apologize for everything and like just kiss u all over and if ur still mad heāll understand but like god knows you canāt stay mad at him
-he acc takes u on a shopping spree the next day and tasks Thoma with inviting all of your friends so when you get back to the estate, itās none other than a surprise party!!
Albedo
-HE DOESNT EVEN KNOW WHAY A BIRTHDAY IS
-thankfully you explained it to him a few weeks before your birthday and even if he isnt human, heād like to partake in it
-but heās never done this before so he has to seek out Kaeya for them
-he went to Klee first but decided It wasnāt best to give you a bomb for your birthday
-Kaeya tells him all type of gift ideas and Albedo acc saves up a bunch of his money to buy you all your favourite stuff
-heās so cute
-he tries to bake a cake
-key word tried
-his cake became demolished like alchemy couldnāt even fix it
-it was adorable though and you thanked him for everything. he forgot about work the whole day just for you :)
Alhaitham
-i cant decide if he forgets or is just too busy to spend it with you
-I think heāll forget to call off work on the day of your birthday and wonāt be able to spend it with you
-like he remembers your birthday but his slow ass just couldnāt remember to call off work
-he does have a present ready for you though! and a long message he sent to your Akasha while he was at work
-he actually did come home early just for you
-insert him twirling you around omfjwknfkwjdjwdjjed
-so if u decide to go out, heāll take you to a very fancy and expensive restaurant and give u ur gift there
-if u decide to stay in heāll bake a cake from scratch with you (those cute movie scenes where thereās like flour on both of ur faces)
-and then end the night watching a movie and falling asleep or birthday fuck, ur choice
Aether
-THIS MAN DOES NOT FORGET
-heās just too busy he canāt spend the whole day with you
-BUT he takes you on commissions with him!!
-big mistake
-so u end up getting hurt and he has to take you to the nearest like hospital or whatever they have in that world
-heāll probably just cry out of guilt because itās ur birthday and part of his gift was that you practically almost die
-memorable birthday in my opinion
-birthday scar !!!
-he gives paimon a bunch of mora so she can go buy food and you both end up spending your birthday in the hospital
-hey at least heās with you !!
-he acc crawls in the hospital bed beside you and your both just cuddling
-paimon is in the corner btw making sure yāall donāt do shit if ykyk
-once ur all better, he makes sure to take you out to dinner and get you an even better gift <3
Childe
-he forgets.
-not changing my mind.
-like I feel like ekaterina will have to remind him
āHow is Y/Nāa birthday so far?ā
-insert jaw drop, shock face, eyes wide
-he will BURST out the bank and run straight to your shared home
-now youāll be sad but like ur choice if u wanna cry or be mad
-if ur crying on the bed heāll sit beside you and start kissing u all over ur face and saying heās sorry and sorry all over again while whispering endearments
-if ur mad heāll let himself be a punching bag
-he ENCOURAGES u to slap him but you only punch him playfully
-heāll take you out and get you the most EXPENSIVE jewelry like literal fucking diamonds
-if u even want u can spend it with Zhongli too
-he just wants to make sure you have the best day just minus the fact he literally forgot
-heāll take u in a trio to Snezhnaya or anywhere in the world just for you to forgive him
Cyno
-ladies and gents and my non-binary friendsā¦.
-he doesnāt forget!!!
-he acc has it all planned out- where you wanna celebrate is your decision
-if you wanna adventure around? Go for it! Heāll be with you and protect you from any monsters
-you wanna stay in? heāll buy every movie you love and youāll do a movie spree
-u wanna party ? Even on short notice heāll Invite everyone hours before and youll all be having fun in the bazaar
-nonetheless he just wants you to have fun- itās your day after all
-he has a lot of money, he just didnāt know what to get you, so if thereās any free time heāll let you go around and buy whatever you want
-at the end of the day heāll cuddle up to you and omg HEāLL LIKE whisper the happy birthday song to you as you drift off to sleep and idk why but thatās so cute to me
Scaramouche/Wanderer
-guys Iām just gonna say Scaramouche cuz for this heās still working for Fatui but he is very ooc and soft (wanderer personality kinda)
-so sorry friends but the man literally doesnāt even know itās your birthday month
-I think Childe will remind him by asking how your bday day is so far and Scaramouche will be like fuck
-Childe will def kaugh at him for forgetting but out of kindness heāll tell Scaramouche what to do
-Scaramouche will race home and heāll kiss u and shit hug u and apologize while saying heāll do anything to make it up to you
-ANYTHING.
-you guys are in Snezhnaya and thereās not much to do but you decide to go ice skating !!
-youāll have to teach him cuz he canāt skate for life
-heāll encourage you to just take his mora or card or wtv and buy whatever you want cuz like
-heās loaded
-you just decide to go buy some food aka hot chocolate to warm up. Maybe some snacks if you wanna watch movies that night
-he does buy you a cake though so when your home he can light it up
-heāll sing the bday song while hugging you from behind and when it comes to your age heāll blow out the candles with you then kiss u on the cheek
-UGH
#genshin impact x reader#genshin impact#scaramouche x reader#genshin fic#genshin impact scaramouche#childe x reader#childe genshin impact#scaramouche x y/n#genshin crack#genshin impact thoma#ayato x reader#kamisato ayato#al haitham#alhaitham x you#alhaitham x y/n#alhaitham x reader#cyno x reader#albedo x reader#aether x reader#genshin hurt/comfort#fluff#genshin fluff#genshin birthday#cyno fluff#scaramouche fluff#alhaitham fluff#ayato fluff#albedo fluff#aether fluff#childe fluff
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Today I really hit a wall on Men. Specifically the male attitude of "helpful women are like virtual calendars/a substitute for remembering things."
Sequence of events:
E is in their school play, and once the date and time is up and the (free) tickets are available, I forward the email to everyone in the family. The play has two showtimes, a 10 am and 6:30 pm.
Unrelated to play, I offer to host a birthday dinner for my stepdad. I text everyone the date and time and say what I'll be cooking.
One week before bday dinner: my dad texts to ask "is the dinner thing this weekend or next weekend?"
At 4:45 on the day of the dinner: Stepdad (guest of honor) texts me "we're meeting at 5, right?" Nope, it's 6! Hey, at least he asked instead of coming an hour early??
During the dinner, the topic of the play comes up. My dad and stepdad both want a reminder of when/where it is. I try to calmly say, and then my dad says "oh I might prefer to go to the morning show time, can I do that?" [lengthy digressions about the different showtimes and the ticketing website, ultimately leading to my dad needing to see if he's actually free in the morning.]
Yesterday, I text my dad to ask if he decided on which show so I'd know whether to get him a ticket for the morning (he can't work the ticketing website). No reply. The play is on Wednesday.
Today, I take E to therapy. On the way back to school, they tell me that at the bday dinner party, my dad said "hey E, gimme a kiss" on his way out the door, and they didn't want to but didn't feel like they could say no (I didn't notice this happening in the moment). We have a big discussion about how I definitely want them to feel like they can say no, they DO NOT have to worry about hurting grandpa's feelings, I will tell grandpa that he should not say "gimme a kiss" to either of my kids and try to have my antenna up at future gatherings. I drop them off at school.
Literally as soon as I drop them off, my dad texts me back about the play - "when is it, tomorrow? I have a doctor appointment at 10."
Blood starts coming out of my ears and mouth. I'm so angry I drive into a ditch while screaming "fuckyoufuckyoufuckyou!" (...not really but that's how I feel)
I reply "the play is tomorrow. There is a 10 am show and a 6:30 pm show. I got you a ticket for 6:30. At dinner on Saturday, you said you might prefer to come to the morning show. But if you have a doctor's appointment at 10, sounds like 6:30 is the best bet. Hope to see you there!"
He replies, "Don't get mad, but where is it? At the school? What's the name of the school?" [he's definitely managed to show up at this school once or twice before. BUT no, the play is not at the school cause there's not enough room there. It's at a church and all that info is in the email I forwarded everyone]
[blackness and tv static noise]
I finally get settled in to my work computer. The first thing I see is a message from my middle aged man coworker saying "hey when you get in can you tell me again how to do a merge request? I'm trying to make myself a checklist so I stop getting it wrong" (a document on this process already exists, as well as two different video recordings, one of which is actually a video of me training THIS VERY GUY. Oh and by the way, there's one other person on my team who knows the procedure inside and out...a male person...but somehow the messages asking for help are sent ONLY TO ME?!?!)
I'm seriously going to lose my fucking mind. I mean the #1 priority is tackling the bodily autonomy stuff for my kid's safety. As for the rest of it, the answer is probably to stop answering these messages and see what happens, but I fear that will lead to worse things (panicked day-of calls that will cause me more stress than a text...or in the case of my stepdad's party, him just being there an hour early to piss me off and get underfoot, and okay maybe you say "that's fine, put him to work!" but in case this post doesn't make clear, these men will find a way to make a simple delegated chore into my problem too.)
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omg omg i know matthews birthday isnt for a couple weeks but i would die for a bday sex one shot omg
i made you wait so long for this i'm so sorry omg. one-shots usually take me longer bc i want them to be detailed!
summary: reader has plans for Matthewās 41st birthday, but things take their own turn.Ā
content warnings: unprotected penetrative sex, oral (male receiving), degradation, Soft!Dom Matthew with some fluff, too; fingering, creampie, implied age gap.Ā
pairing: Fem!Reader/Matthew
word count: 4.3k
masterlist
I haul the enormous bag of flour onto the counter, grunting. it's early afternoon, and my day has been spent wrapping all of Matthew's gifts and trying to plan out the perfect birthday celebration. he's turning 41, and all I want is for him to feel as special as he feels to me. the cake is the last piece of the puzzle, and I'm hoping that my less-than-excellent culinary skills improve over the course of the next few hours.
I set out all the ingredients first, swaying to my music while I go through the recipe and decide how much I need. it shouldn't be too complicated, right? just chocolate cake with buttercream frosting. I thought I'd try to recreate the Rumple Buttercup cartoon with it, but now I'm not so sure. that might be flirting with disaster.
instead of deciding right there, I just get started on the batter. I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.
the air is thick with sweetness and warmth as the oven slowly pre-heats and I stir together the silky smooth chocolate batter. I pour the mix into a round baking pan, tapping it a bit to make sure it's even, before pushing it into the oven. naturally, I lick the whisk clean.
my phone buzzes in my pocket and I pull it out to see that Matthew's texted me.
on my way home now!
my heart stutters in my chest as I check the time. he's definitely early; he told me this morning that he wouldn't be at home until at least seven. my eyes flicker to the cake, over the messy kitchen, and back to my screen.
early?
yep. can't wait to see you. followed by a series of heart emojis. I start to panic a little. this throws my whole schedule off; I was going to do my hair, pick up food from his favorite restaurant, set the table, litter the bed with rose petals. I wanted everything to be just right for him; it's the first time he's had a birthday with me.
and now he's going to come home to me with flour-dusted cheeks and a half-baked cake. I quickly clean the kitchen and wipe my face before running off to the bedroom, rifling through my closet for something nice. thank god I already showered this morning because there's no way I'd have time now. I find the dress I'd planned to wear, red and slinky and pretty, before dropping my clothes and changing right away.
truly, I move at the speed of light when I do my hair, scatter the rose petals, and call the restaurant to get our order started. we'll need to run out and get it, but Matthew likes going for walks, so that shouldn't be a problem.
the smell of chocolate wafts through the house while I tie an apron around my waist and get a bowl out of the cabinets. the cake needs to cool for a while, but I might as well get started on the frosting. who knows how long that'll take?
too damn long, apparently.
Matthew opens the front door while I'm halfway through my crumb coat, the soft green shade of the Rumple Buttercup colors coming along nicely. I start to panic a little when I hear his footsteps on the stairs.
"Y/N!" he calls out.
"kitchen!" I respond without moving. he probably shouldn't see the cake, but at this point it's too late. there's fluffy buttercream frosting and food coloring all over my apron. all I can do is wait patiently as he strolls into the room.
"what are you up to?" he sets his hand on my back, smiling.
"making your cake, birthday boy."
"mmm." he wraps a hand around my arm, drags it down while leaning his chin on my shoulder. "looks really nice so far."
"you like the color?" I ask.
"I do." he mumbles, starting to touch my waist. "what material is this?"
"silk."
"you know I love that." he squeezes my waist and I have to resist the blush spreading up my cheeks. he's affectionate right now, and I want to resist, but it's hard.
"what're you doing?" I question playfully in response to the drifting of his fingers down my thighs.
"I'm excited to see you."
"I'm excited to see you, too, but we have a strict schedule tonight."
Matthew groans and drops his head into the space between my neck and shoulder. his hands don't leave my hips.
"why?" he whines.
"because I want you to have the best birthday ever." I smooth off the top of the cake, sighing when he digs his fingernails into me. it feels heavenly, and the featherlight kisses he's leveling on my jaw are making me woozy.
"making me wait?" he brushes over my ass, squeezing the flesh lightly. "that's cruel."
I laugh a little and swipe my finger through the frosting.
"try this and tell me if I'm still cruel."
he grabs my hand in both of his, sliding my index into his mouth and licking it off of me. my jaw drops in surprise before he pulls away and drops it. it's unbelievably sexy.
"that is really good." he smiles, then kisses my cheek in an alarmingly innocent manner. he knows what he's doing. "don't be a tease, darling."
"you--" I stutter, trying to regain my concentration. it's futile at this point; it isn't until he moves away from my body that I'm able to keep working on the cake. he only glances with a knowing smirk, walking around the counter to sit across from me.
"how was your day?"
"my day was jam-packed with planning for a little ingrate's birthday." I joke.
"I'm not an ingrate." he protests. one look at his pout and I feel guilty for teasing. standing on tiptoes, I lean over the counter and plant a kiss on his mouth.
"you're right, I'm sorry," I sigh. "I just had a whole plan and when you came home early, I didn't have time for all of it."
"what can I do?" he offers immediately. I scowl.
"you're not gonna help me prepare your birthday celebration, silly."
"but I wanna make it easier."
"you wanna make it easier?" I ask, the corners of my lips quirking up. he nods enthusiastically and I hold his gaze. "I need to go pick up our dinner, so you can walk with me."
"ooh, yes!" he leaps up in an almost child-like manner, coming around to my side again. I nuzzle into his shoulder as I finish piping the face onto the cake. he snorts when he sees the completed project. "is that Rumple?"
"shut up, it looks so bad." I complain. my body leans into his in defeat. even though I tried, Rumple looks like he's been possessed and exorcised in one sitting: he's got crazy eyes and a lopsided face.
"no, it's beautiful," he pecks the top of my head. "he's supposed to look funny."
all I can do is turn around and hug him, giggling at the absolute monstrosity that I've created. he wraps his arms around me tightly and we start to sway a little.
"I feel like Victor Frankenstein." I laugh. he untangles our bodies to tilt my chin up and look at him.
"you're way cuter." he rubs my nose with his own. I'm smiling so big, it hurts. he makes me so unbelievably happy, I can't imagine not being by his side. Matthew is the best boyfriend in the world, and I really want everything to live up to his expectations.
our fingers thread together briefly before we get ready to go pick up our food.
...
"I am literally going to combust." I giggle, throwing my napkin onto the table. red wax drips down the sides of the candle between us, and Matthew's eyes are starry as he watches me talk.
"good?" he asks.
"amazing. how was yours?"
"could barely get it down." he gestures to the empty plate. I throw my head back and laugh more than I should. Matthew frowns. "what?"
"that's such a dad joke."
"really?" he laughs along with me until we're both just smiling brightly at each other. I don't want to step too far; we've been dating under a year, still. but I see myself with Matthew forever. we've already moved in together; I've never felt so strongly as I feel for him, and I think that he feels it, too. in our bones.
"yes, but I like dad jokes."
"come here." he holds his arms out and I get up from the table, walking over to sit on his lap. he shifts so I can be more comfortable, and I place both hands on my stomach.
"I have such a food baby right now."
"do you?" he sets one hand over the bump. I lean my head into his shoulder, curling up a little. he starts to rub my tummy gently, holding me close while we sit in a relative quiet. "I like it."
"mmm." I hum, wrapping my arms around his neck. although he could easily turn this sexual, he doesn't. we just linger, breathing and letting our food settle. I really am full; the chances of me falling asleep are higher than not.
I ask Matthew to tell me more about his day as I sit there, and the rumble of his voice in his chest is soothing. as the candle wax drips further and further down, I watch it with lethargic eyes. I've had a hard year-- Matthew's made it better. he can read me like a book, and he listens like I've got all the answers in the world. I love him. and when I head to the kitchen to slice the cake, he follows me with his arms around my waist. we move like two people who have been together a long time, like we can anticipate the next person's movement down to the flicker of their eye contact, down to their step.
"I can't believe you have room for dessert." I grab a knife from the drawer, along with some plates. Matthew kisses my head.
"I've got room for multiple desserts."
"was that a sexual allusion or are you actually hungry?" I turn briefly to gauge his behavior. if he hasn't had enough to eat, I'll feel horrible. but he leans down to my ear. it still sends a shiver down my spine.
"definitely sexual," he smirks, then retreats. "let's do this, though, first. I want a piece of Rumple's eyeball."
"just get out the candles so I can do this for you." I push him away. he heads to the cupboard and returns with the pack of candles that I begin to spear into the cake. I only put in ten because there's not room for forty-one, but he doesn't seem to mind as I light them up individually.
"go sit down! you weren't even supposed to come in here." I laugh as I lift the dish into my arms and shoo him into the other room. Matthew gives me a sidelong look, smiling for an unknown reason, before following my orders.
he pretends to look surprised when I bring the thing out to him, mouth making a pleased O shape.
"wow!" he cheers.
"make a wish, then, my love." I tell him. he inhales deeply, then blows out the candles. one or two stragglers remain, their flames flickering before he tries again and snuffs them out. I clap my hands.
"happy birthday, baby!"
he grins at me and starts to pluck the candles out of the cake. "you didn't sing to me." he says.
"trust me, that was a gift in itself." I laugh before picking up the knife. "how big a slice do you want?"
Matthew seems to think for a second on this, squinting as he examines the thing.
"big."
"alright then." I cut an enormous hunk out, making sure to get one of the maddened eyeballs on it before sliding it onto the plate and giving it to him. "enjoy."
"oh, I will." before I can move to sit across from him, he reaches out and pulls me into his lap. I let out a surprised noise, but settle in anyway on his thigh while I cut my own slice of cake. we eat together.
"it's actually pretty good." I'm impressed with myself. sure, it's not a super complicated recipe. but I still did well. Matthew wraps his arm around my waist, one hand holding his plate while the other digs the fork in.
"it's amazing." he nods through a mouthful of food.
"how's the eye?"
"how you'd expect a vitreous humor to taste." he jokes, laughing as I elbow him in the ribs. "ow!" he complains. I swipe some of the frosting off the top of his slice and tap it over his nose. he wrinkles it at the sensation.
"maybe I'll just leave." I move to get up, but he keeps me in place. his little smile, so determined in its happiness, makes my heart soften. for all of his teasing, he's weak for me, and I love it. when I lean down a little to lick the icing off, he blushes.
"when can I have you?" he asks quietly, one hand resting on the top of my bare thigh. it tightens around my skin, growing more aware of my presence in his lap. I bite my lip and mull this over, subtly draw the hem of my dress up a bit just to tease him.
"I'm thinking..." this time, he lets me get up. my fingers slide through his, dragging him with me. "now."
Matthew gets an excited grin on his face before I spin around and lead him to the bedroom. a couple candles are burning, filling the room with a deep, sensual smell that he inhales as he stops in his tracks.
"did you put rose petals on our bed?" he chuckles, staring at me with his eyebrows raised in an adoring expression. I run my palms up his chest, stopping below his shoulders. I poke my tongue between my teeth as I smile.
"yes, I did."
"very romantic."
"is it?" I lift an eyebrow. it takes everything in me not to pounce on him right then.
"consider me seduced."
"if you ever use that word again, I'm calling this off." I laugh. he silences it in a kiss, eagerly gathering my body up in his arms as he tilts his head to deepen it. a slight moan slips through me, pleased with the gentle, innocent pleasure he elicits. he's softer than velvet. when he crushes the silk of my dress in his fist, lifting it over my ass so he can touch me without barriers, he groans.
"did I pay for this?" he rolls the fabric between his fingers.
"mhmm." I hum.
"good." his breath hitches when the zipper comes down easily, the garment falling to the floor and leaving me in brand new black lingerie. his eyes move hungrily over my body, pupils dilating further as he takes in the curves of my figure.
"this is new."
I twist around a bit, showing him the back as well, his grip on my waist loosening only to allow me this movement. "you like it?"
he groans. "I love it."
I want to start undressing him, greedy for the sight of his naked body, but he reaches down and lifts me into his arms, my legs wrapping around him while he carries me to the floral-covered mattress. I sink into a rosy paradise, almost give into the alluring sensations he causes with his fingertips over my skin.
he's between my legs, teeth seeking out collarbone and the swell of my chest. it would be so, so easy to remain here, pinned down and allowing him to let loose on me. every deliberate shadow on my body is like a sunburst. but I can't.
I grab his shoulders and yank him down next to me. he peers at me with a smile, wondering what I've got in store. the answer is too loaded to fit into one sentence, so I watch him move up the bed until he's resting his head on the pillow, my legs moving to straddle him.
"taking control?" he questions. he knows I don't usually like to be on top. instead of replying, I reach behind me and undo the clasps of my bra, sliding it from my arms before tossing it somewhere else. his eyes widen and he goes to grab at my tits, but I'm too quick. I lean down, unbuttoning his shirt and drawing my nails over his chest as I lower myself to his pants.
Matthew is silent, open-mouthed at the red marks I leave behind on his smooth skin. it's intoxicating for me, too, and I work quickly to tug his bottoms down his legs, the boxers with them. when his dick is released, I let him struggle through a moment of no contact.
"let me touch you." he goes to stroke himself. my gaze flickers between the length he's now gripping in his hand and the needy look on his face. I want to fuck him right now. every cell in my body aches for him, for the pleasure that so violently rips through my veins when he's inside.
"not yet." I betray myself, and his hips buck into empty air when he sees my torso so close to his erection. when I drop my head and lick up the underside, he lets go of himself and allows me to tease him. I pause at the tip, then hold the base while I spit on it.
"shit!" he grunts as I start to swirl my tongue around him. his fingers run through my hair. "suck on it, baby."
all I do is moan, the vibration torturing him. I peek up through my lashes and see the veins in his neck throbbing while he resists the urge to fuck my mouth. I soften and lower my head slowly, inch by inch swallowing his cock. he hits the back of my throat. the slight gag that runs through me makes him sigh. it's then that I tap his hand as our signal to push my head down.
Matthew loses it. he starts to shove my mouth onto him, fucking it, one hand reaching behind him to grab the top of the headboard while he groans.
"choke on it... fuck." he moans. there are tears in my eyes from the pressure, but I keep looking at him the whole time. he's gorgeous, mouth dropped open in ecstasy while he goes between rolling his eyes into the back of his head and staring with an intense desire.
every time I gag, he lets out an unholy noise and gets excited all over again, his hips moving to meet my lips until he's on the edge of falling apart. his cock twitches and I moan, but he's not willing to finish.
"get over here so I can fuck you." his voice is borderline raspy as he forces himself to release my head. I sit up and wipe the spit from my mouth, crawling on top of him again to leave some of my favorite marks on his neck. he's mine. every bite stands to prove it, and his quick breaths let me know that he's not going to wait much longer.
his fingertips hook in the waistband of my panties and he pushes them down my thighs, purses his lips while he watches me shimmy out of them. it's wonderful, seeing the disarray in his face whenever he catches sight of my naked form. he never knows where to touch first, moving over my breasts to my waist and hips down to my legs. like he's trying to blend our bodies together by simply drinking me in.
I tense when he reaches out and sinks two fingers into me. I'm so wet, it takes almost no pressure.
"fucking soaked, huh?" he smirks. my hands steady themselves on his shoulders as he starts to pump in and out of me. I groan.
"get inside, please." I murmur nearly incoherently. he starts to go faster, his cock throbbing against his stomach. but he wants me to squirm and beg.
"oh, so you've got demands?" he teases. his fingers curl in my pussy, brushing over my special spot, and I almost gasp at the pleasure. "after making me wait?"
"I just--" I start to defend myself, but it's fruitless. he guides my face down to his, whispering in my ear.
"let me guess: you just wanted me to have a good birthday?"
"yes." a choked, desperate reply.
"let me show you what kind of present I want, then." he removes his fingers and lines himself up at my entrance, pushing me all the way down before sliding the pads of his digits into my mouth. I lick them clean while I moan. his cock is so deep inside me, I can barely breathe.
the combined pressures between my hips and on my tongue, make me give up on drawing this out. it feels so good, I couldn't stop myself if I wanted to. I rise up a bit and sink onto him again, his jaw clenched at the sensation. he lets me do this a couple times and then pauses my actions.
"get on your hands and knees." he orders. I lift myself obediently, whining slightly at the loss of contact, before he sits up and switches positions so that he's kneeling behind. I wait patiently for him to do what he wants with me. he doesn't disappoint.
softly, he pushes my head down so that my cheek rests against the pillow while he slides in from the back. it's a completely different angle and I can barely handle the way he works through the tightness, his moans louder this time.
"thought you could sit on it and I would just let you?" he chuckles darkly, pulling out and moving in. my breath rattles in my chest at the repeated, delicious intrusions. my eyelids flutter shut while he keeps talking to me in that commanding, low tone. "you're my little slut."
the moan that comes from my lips is pathetic, like a mewl. he plows into me and my face presses into the mattress.
"such a perfect little pussy," his hands lure my hips to him while he groans at the new depths he keeps finding. "so responsive for me."
"faster, Matthew." I whine. although he's not going slow, I need more. the slam of his body against mine, from this angle, creates just short of enough friction for my clit. he follows my request, however, and fucks me at an insatiable pace.
"you like that?" he grunts. I literally don't have the mobility to nod, so I shove my ass back instead to take more. he bucks. "you feel so fucking good."
I whimper and he starts to stimulate my clit by reaching around, lowering himself a bit to do so. he keeps his arm pressed to my stomach so he can feel the bulge of his cock sliding in and out of me. "good girl. take it."
my fingertips fist the sheets and I whine as my orgasm approaches. he switches the pattern of pressure, finding what makes me fall apart fastest. I'm on the edge, my mouth dropping open in a silent cry. my hips start to move on their own, working against his cock as I moan his name and tumble into the abyss.
"Matthew, right there-- fuck me, fuck me--" I moan. he rams his hips so hard, the headboard slams the wall and he groans.
"you're gonna make me break you, baby." he warns. I bite my lip so hard that I almost puncture the skin, feeling like a planetary collision is occurring within my lower stomach. I'm coming up on a second climax.
"break me, then." I dare.
Matthew wraps his arm around my chest and brings me up so that I'm leaning against his chest while he whispers in my ear. "defiant little whores don't get my cum."
"but--" I complain, hips wriggling for more while he thrusts into me.
"apologize or I'll stop fucking you right now." he slows just to demonstrate the torture of not being inside me. I grasp at his hips to coax him, but he's determined. I take a shaky breath at the smooth, slow movements.
"I'm sorry." I beg. he reaches down and starts to play with my bundle of nerves again. as much as he wants to make me crash, he loves the way this feels, too.
"mmm," he hums while laying sloppy kisses along my neck. "good thing I wanna fill you up for being so sweet today."
his thrusts are uncontrolled and needy, rapid pushes between my legs that cause me to start shaking all over again. he rubs my clit and moans in my ear, spilling.
"I love you so much." he mumbles. the hand holding me to him squeezes one of my tits while I arch my spine and enjoy the slowing pace of our bodies. I moan his name.
"I love you, too." I'm in awe of how he changes for me, his attitude shifts whenever we're in bed. it's cosmic, how we fit together. and his withdrawal from my body causes both of us to collapse onto the bed with exhaustion.
I can only suck in air for a while. my limbs are like lead, in the best way.
"that was hot." he mutters. I turn to him, admiring his beautiful features, and nod lazily.
"a successful birthday, then?"
"after that cake? yeah." he scoffs jokingly and I giggle before curling into him. he traces his fingertips down my skin. "do you wanna take a shower?"
"I'm so tired." I groan. Matthew glances at me.
"I'm the one who just turned forty-one."
"shut up."
"come on, then. let's get you cleaned up."
he rises from the mattress, bringing me with him. a few stray rose petals flutter onto the ground.
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mark lee sucks at technology.
tap the heart if you have a big, fat, embarrassing crush on your best friend!
pairing :: lee mark x reader genre :: fluff / best friend + social influencer au word count :: 5,883 words warnings :: none playlist :: dumb stuff (lany) ā feeling (coin) ā so far so good (gabrielle aplin)Ā ā electric love (bĆørns)Ā ā love by mistake (bad suns) authorās note ::Ā i was debating if i should post it on his bday instead, but i decided to drop it earlier, so uh, happy (approx. one week early) bday to mister absolutely fully capable (except when it comes to tech stuff) !!!! thank you for blessing us with your god tier raps ā” ā³ part of the not clickbait series.
In your required upper division business course aptly titled āEssential Marketing Strategies,ā you had learned about a concept called personal brands. A personal brand is explained as the first impression a person wishes to perceive based on their own experiences, qualifications, and achievements. Your professor had told you and your classmates to pick three words to define your own brand. For instance, you chose to label yourself as charismatic, fun, and creative.
Your best friendās brand would be awkward, endearing, and technologically challenged.Ā
Okay, so that is definitely more than three words, but whoās counting? You might as well tack on āY/Nās big fat crushā at this rate because everyone and their mother knows that you carry a torchāor more accurately, a blazing wildfire that can easily be spotted from Plutoāfor your best friend.
Well, to be more precise, you should probably say everyone, except Mark, knows. And thatās not for lack of trying either. You completely dropped the art of delicate subtlety months ago already. Maybe you should add āhopelessly obliviousā instead.
The rolling end credits to the sixth Harry Potter film are playing on the screen in front of you, signaling the nearing end of your magical movie marathon. Youāre seated on the worn down couch in Mark and Donghyuckās shared apartment, watching the former make his drink with the fancy, gently used Keurig newly settled on the scratched countertop. Johnny dropped it off a few days ago because he had splurged on a better coffee machine (āIt even makes Instagram worthy whipped frappuccinos!ā) and didnāt want his old, but still perfectly functioning caffeine provider going to waste.
āWhatās wrong with this thing?ā Mark slaps the side of the machine, and it starts to emit a low whirring noise. āOh, thatās good, right? That sound is good, you think?ā
His question is immediately answered by the sad squirt of hot water speckled with coffee grinds falling into his mug for a few seconds before the machine shuts off.
āWhat the hell?ā he mutters angrily, carding his hand through his hair in frustration, and you finally decide to take pity on your best friend. Getting up from the comfy spot you know you sadly wonāt be able to recreate perfectly again later, you stride over to where your best friend stands and flip open the top of the Keurig.
āHyuck didnāt take out his used coffee pod,ā you say, pulling out the incriminating evidence of your best friendās roommate and disposing it in the trash can next to the refrigerator. āWhereās the espresso one youāre gonna use? Why didnāt you put that in?ā
His jaw slackens, and he sheepishly rubs the back of his neck, avoiding your gaze and mumbling, āI thought Iād just open it later and pour it into my hot water.ā
āMark,ā you start, placing your hands on his shoulders firmly and staring into his eyes with a serious look on your face. āPlease know that Iām saying this in the most loving way possible, but you are an absolute idiot.ā
You release your grip on his shoulders and grab the espresso pod dangling from his fingertips before slotting it into the Keurig. You remove the mug he placed underneath the spout and wash out the accidental coffee water before placing it back in its original position and pressing the start button on the machine. With a sigh, you lean against the side of the counter, glancing at your friend who looks like a child being scolded for stealing from the cookie jar.
āIf you pour the pod into your mug, are you just going to chug all the loose coffee grinds, too?ā
ā... I didnāt think that far ahead.ā His lips start to unintentionally form a tiny pout, and your eyes (and your heart, too) soften.
Youāre very relieved that Donghyuck is off filming with your friend because he definitely would be making fun of your heart eyes that frequently make an appearance around a certain Mark Lee. Which you always deny. Because you certainly do not have a gigantic crush on your technologically inept best friend.
You glance over at him again and have to physically fight yourself to resist the urge to kiss his cute pout away. Okay, so maybe you harbor a very respectable, medium sized crush. But it's no big deal. Itās completely under control.Ā Unless youāre counting the fact that your best friend is still unaware, and youāre running out of ideas to try and see if he likes you back before you actually shoot your shot. Then itās very much not under control because youāre losing sleep over it and you donāt know what to do to be any more obvious without stating the, well, obvious.
āWell, now you know. If you forget, you can FaceTime me and Iāll give you instructions on how it works.ā You pat his shoulder reassuringly before pausing. āWait, you do know how to FaceTime, right?ā
āYes!ā he exclaims, sulking even more before confessing in a quieter, defeated tone, āHyuck showed me last month.ā
Mark grabs his finished drink and follows behind you, settling back onto the couch next to you. The streaming service already has Deathly Hallows Part 1 in the queue and ready to go, and your best friend is ready to click play until he notices your attention being focused on the smaller screen in your hands. He wonders if youāre about to post another one of your popular cooking videos on that app that shares a name with the most iconic song of the 2000s (hint: the name of the songās singer is made up of four letters and a dollar sign).
āAre you uploading one of your videos?ā he implores before taking a sip of his drink with a satisfied smile. Somehow, it always tastes better when you make it, and he canāt figure out why for the life of him. When he went to Johnnyās place, his older friend uses the exact same pod and water ratio for his espresso, and yet, itās never as good as yours.
āNah, Iām ordering my grocery delivery before I forget. Do you want anything?ā You select the option to load your usual grocery items into your cart before debating on whether or not you should splurge on buying several packages of those seasonal Pillsbury sugar cookies that only come in stock during certain holidays. It seems like such an insult to the entire premise of your Tiktok account based on baking and cooking, but youāre an absolute sucker for those soft pastries.
āYeah, can you get me a Shin Ramyun ten pack? Hyuck ate the last one two days ago and didnāt tell me.ā
āYou sure you donāt want ten boxes again?ā You decide to get those Pillsbury sugary delights, happily adding three boxes to your cart. Everybody has a weakness, and yours just so happens to be a premade one way ticket to diabetes. Youāre here for a good, delicious time, not a long time.
āNo! That was an accident!ā He objects, flailing his hands around, before falling back against the couch cushions in defeat. āBut Hyuck does all the online grocery shopping now.ā
āThank god. You guys finally have quality toilet paper again.ā
The past month of bathroom occurrences was plagued with scratchy tissue that felt more like goddamn sandpaper from the horrible depths of hell. To be honest, you probably would have rather used actual sandpaper, given the choice. You even made sure not to drink too much water any time you came over, but today, you decided to splurge on a venti passion fruit iced tea with sweetener from that very popular franchise sporting a mermaid logo and fiscally cosmic name. To your pleasant surprise, your trip to the toilet this time was wonderfully padded with Charmin Ultra Soft, not that absolutely awful off brand one with the gross texture of a dried pinecone from inferno.
āHey, that toilet paper was a good steal! It was a three for one deal,ā Mark protests, and you narrow your eyes at him.
āWow, I wonder why it was priced so low.ā You deadpan, and Mark blanches, recalling all those restroom incidents that were rather rough. Literally.
āAnyway, do you think my viewers wanna see me make chocolate crinkle cookies or mochi doughnuts?ā You bring up the two recipes you managed to perfect and add your own spin to on your phone, eyes scanning the ingredient lists.
āBoth. And tell me when youāre making them, so I can come over and eat them.ā He gives you a wide grin, and you let out a snort at that. His smile only grows as he says happily, āI love your job.ā
āYou only love it because you can freeload off of me,ā you jest, but nevertheless begin to start to add all the ingredients for both recipes to your shopping cart. You always film cooking videos on Tuesdays, edit on Wednesdays, keep Thursdays free for last minute touch ups and emergencies, and post one every week on Fridays with other various random videos uploaded whenever in between. With that in mind, you schedule your upcoming grocery delivery for Monday.
āHey, you need me. Iām the best taste tester.ā He puffs up his chest proudly before hastily tacking on a more genuine reason. āAnd because Iād starve without you. I canāt live off of instant ramen and frozen chicken nuggets forever. Gordon Ramsay already confirmed my shitty cooking skills. I need you to survive.ā
āOh my god, when I uploaded those pics of your scrambled eggs on Twitter, I lost like a hundred followers in less than a minute.ā You confirm the delivery and place your phone on the coffee table, picking up the opened bag of Cheeto puffs before settling back in your seat. āMy cooking credibility was completely shot. I had to explain to my fans that I didnāt make those.ā
āYeah, but now everyone calls me Eggy Boi online!ā he whines, and you laugh. You have to admit, itās quite a funny play on the whole āedgy boiā terminology. You wonder if Mark will find it amusing if he discovers his roommate is the culprit behind his new online persona (He probably wonāt, and you reckon Donghyuck enjoys living in a safe space where he doesnāt have to sleep with one eye open, so you stay quiet about it. Youāll use it as leverage some other time).
āOkay, Eggy Boi, come by on Tuesday because Iāll be baking in the afternoon,ā you say casually, grabbing the remote control from your best friend and pressing play.Ā
You very narrowly avoid a green gummy bear to the face. It lands somewhere behind the couch, lost forever to the dust bunnies and other snacks that missed its target. You know for a fact that itāll stay there until the boys decide to move to a new apartment. Mark grumbles at the miss, biting off the head of a red cherry flavored gummy bear perhaps a little harder than necessary.
āI hate you. But Iām still coming over next week because I want a doughnut.ā
āNo cookie?ā
ā... and a cookie. Maybe two.ā
Wednesday comes faster than you expected, and youāre currently holed up in your apartmentās second bedroomāwhich you had transformed into a snazzy office spaceācompleting the edits to your second video on mochi doughnuts. You already finished polishing the one about the cookies earlier, thank goodness. If you had to stare at your computer screen for another three hours, you would rather eat those pastries Mark tried to make two months ago, but had mistaken salt for sugar. Adding a cup of salt to any baked good is an extremely effective way to make anyone who tasted your best friendās brownies experience a trip to the beach. Because they essentially just swallowed a mouthful of sand and ocean water. Because itās salty as heck. Just like Mark was when you told him.
Speaking of your best friend, heās currently puttering around in your kitchen doing god knows what. He knows better than to try another recipe and possibly blow up your number one moneymakerāyour prized ovenāin the process. Your heart nearly drops when your ears pick up the faint chopping sounds of a knife against your wooden cutting board. Is he going to try to temper chocolate again? He nearly burned through your entire stock of dark, milk, and white chocolate last time.
After much contemplation and deciding that you deserve a good procrastination break and a fully intact kitchen, youāre about to go out and see what heās up to when Mark timidly appears in your doorway, clutching onto a white bowl of watermelon cubes with a fork tucked neatly in it. He shuffles in, dropping the snack on your desk before turning to walk out without a word, not wanting to disturb your work mode.Ā
Your heart warms up at the sight, and you speak up, a small smile slipping into your face. āWhatās this for?ā
āKnowing you, you probably havenāt eaten anything since breakfast.ā He pauses in the doorway and adds on sheepishly, āAnd I can't cook anything, so this is what you get.ā
Your heart swells tenfold, and your smile widens even more as you spear a piece of fruit with the fork and quickly pop it into your mouth. āThanks, Marky.ā
His cheeks flush with a pretty shade of carmine, and he fails to suppress the little giddy smile that appears on his face at your nickname for him. He walks out of your office, reddened cheeks still rising up higher than ever. āY-Yeah, of course. No problem.ā
By the time you finish adding the final few touches to your edited video, the bowl of watermelon has been picked clean. You save your video and transfer both of your completed projects to your phone, making a mental note to schedule their uploads and add them to your accountās posting queue later. Shoving your phone in the pocket of your sweats after ensuring the successful transfer of your videos, you pick up the empty dish and walk out towards the kitchen, the silver fork clinking against the side of the bowl with every step.
As you wash the dish and utensil, Mark wanders over from his spot on the couch, leaning forward and casually placing his chin on your shoulder. Almost instantaneously, you feel the heat rising to your cheeks as you briefly fantasize about your best friend wrapping his arms around your waist and how domestic and sweet the two of you would look, like one of those cheesy couples the two of you always made fun of.
āWhatās up?ā you ask, making a conscious effort to hold your voice steady and not waver over the fact that Mark is basically draped over you. After you place the dish on the drying rack, you turn around to face your best friend, sorely miscalculating the distance as mere inches separate your face from his now.
āIāā Puberty decides to make an ugly appearance in the form of an ill timed voice crack, and he internally curses as he takes a step back, willing the incoming blush to go away. Letting out a small cough, he tries again, scratching the back of his neck nervously.
āI, um, Jisung sent me some kind of dance video. He said itās a challenge? I kinda donāt know what to do with it? Like do I make a new dance, record myself, and send it back? Actually, isn't it easier to just do a dance battle face to face?ā
āCan I see the video?ā You already have a good idea on what the video will be, but you want to confirm it. Mark fumbles with his phone, pulling up the video in his text messages. He angles the phone towards you for you to see, and you grab his hand, bringing the device a little closer to you for a better look and clicking play.
āOh, itās a Tiktok challenge! Heās doing the Say So dance!ā you exclaim, recognizing the song almost immediately as your eyes follow the fluid dance moves, completely enthralled. āSo a challenge isnāt going up against someone, like a battle. Itās just some kind of trend or concept that you try to copy yourself. Youāre supposed to learn the same dance and record yourself for this one. I can show you some other challenges and help you practice and record this one tomorrow if you wanna drop by after work!ā
āO-Oh, okay, sounds good.ā Mark stumbles over his words, attempting to focus on what youāre saying and the dance Jisung is doing, but all he can think about is the way your body is pressed against his side, hand comfortably wrapped around his. He freezes up as the tips of his ears grow redder and redder with every passing second, and his face sports a similar color. He silently prays for the telltale crimson to go away by the time the dance is over.
When the video ends, you once again realize the close proximity between you and your best friend. Your face burns at this revelation, and you awkwardly take a step back. Clearing your throat, you hastily release Markās hand (He inaudibly lets out the breath heās been holding in this entire time, yet he also already misses the way your hand felt grasping his).
āUh, anyway, Iām gonna make a latte. Do you want a drink, too?ā You walk towards the other side of your kitchen with Mark trailing behind you. You take out a floral, peachy colored mug from your cupboards before pausing and looking at your best friend. āWait, do you remember how to use a Keurig?ā
āYes!ā He says, slightly exasperated as he picks out his own cup from your cabinet. He always uses the same oneāa cerulean blue mug with squiggles all over itāand all of your friends and guests know not to use it because itās unofficially officially Markās mug (And perhaps, you did indeed buy it from that overpriced kitschy tableware shop down the street two years ago with your best friend in mind).
āReally?ā You select the latte option and press start after you had already positioned the mug beneath the spout and inserted a green tea matcha pod. He finally relents, shoulders sagging and a defeated expression on his face.
ā... No.ā
You chuckle, taking the mug from him and carefully putting it on the counter. You grab the espresso pod you know he likes from the drawer below and place it next to the cup. āItās okay, Iāll teach you again.ā
Mark tries. He really does. He tries very hard to concentrate on memorizing the simple process, but he keeps getting distracted. His eyes are focused on the correct button to push before they start to trail up to your fingertips. And then, they go from your hand to your arm, then up to the elegant curve of your neck, and finally, to the way your lashes frame your pretty eyes and how the tip of your tongue sticks out slightly as you concentrate until all he can focus on is you, you, you.
Suddenly, in what feels like a blink of an eye, youāre done and handing him his finished drink, complete with a perfectly whipped milk foam on top. You ask him if he knows how to make it now, and all he can do is lie and nod with a barely convincing smile.
After all, how can Mark tell his best friend that the reason he never remembers is because youāre the biggest distraction?
Mark should be here in five minutes, according to his most recent text message. And in the text message below that, your friend had sent you a challenge. More specifically, itās the one she completed with Donghyuck a few weeks ago. When you said you wanted bold suggestions on how to figure out if your best friend feels the same way about you as you do about him, you didnāt want one this bold.Ā
Yet, the video link to your friendās ātoday I kissed my best friendā challenge along with a winky face from her is staring mockingly at you.Ā While you arenāt one to back down from a challenge, the mere thought of kissing your best friend causes vast colonies of butterflies to erupt in your stomach and your ears to feel as if they have caught on fire. Youāre already tongue tied with your head in the clouds, and he isnāt even here yet. How utterly fantastic.
However, your mother definitely did not raise a quitter, so you spring into action when you hear the faint jingling of a key being inserted into your apartmentās door (You had given Mark a copy of your key almost immediately after you had moved in). You move the pretty indoor fern given to you by Jaemin as a housewarming gift last year closer to the edge of your towering bookcase, leaning your phone against it. You quickly position the device to capture a good view of the couch area in your living room and press the record button, arranging a few of the leaves to hide as much of your phone as you possibly can without obstructing the lens.
You run full speed to your bedroom, letting out a sigh of relief when youāre safely inside and hear Mark finally unlocking the door successfully and shuffling in. When he calls out to you, you try to even out your breathing, walking out of your room with your tripod and laptop in hand.
āHey,ā you greet him in the most casual tone you can muster. You place the tripod down and sit before opening your laptop and setting it on the coffee table. āI thought we could watch a few challenges for fun before trying the Say So one. Have you watched Jisungās videos before?ā
āUm, well, no, not really,ā he confesses sheepishly, taking a seat next to you on the couch, leg pressing against yours. He squints at the YouTube video you pulled up earlier before he had arrived, reading the title before clicking the space button to start it. āSavage Tiktok dance compilation part two?ā
āWait, hold up.ā You pause the video and then turn to face him with an incredulous expression on your face. āYouāve never watched any of Jisungās dance Tiktoks?ā
āNoā¦ I donāt even have an account.ā His cheeks are dusted with the lightest shade of pink as he quietly admits, āI watch all of yours though.ā
Your eyes widen at his confession, face heating up as you stammer out, āO-Oh, well, I can help you make an account later to upload your video.ā
āSounds good.ā Thereās a few seconds of silence as you mull over his previous words before he speaks up again awkwardly, āShould I, uh, play the video?ā
āOh! Yes, right! Of course, hit play,ā you laugh nervously, twisting and playing with the hair tie around your wrist. He starts the video again, and the two of you watch the compilation, slowly relaxing once more as you tap your fingers to the rhythm of the song and he bobs his head to the beat.
āDo I have to change outfits like that?ā he questions a few minutes later, eyes growing round as he sees the girl on the screen switch between four different outfits throughout the dance. His closet basically consists of the same five black shirts that he stole from Jaehyun. Even if he did do an outfit swap, there would literally be no difference at all.
āYou donāt have to,ā you assure him, clicking the enter key to play the next video thatās recommended: another Tiktok dance challenge compilation. āAll you have to do is copy the dance.ā
Mark nods, taking a glance at the laptop screen before his hand shoots out and he pauses the video, leaning forward to take a closer look at the little recommended video title banner at the top. āWait! Whatās that one?ā
He clicks on it, the new video now loading up. The two of you wait patiently for it to begin, waiting for the spinning disc to stop. But it doesnāt. In fact, the whole chrome page goes blank and then, the little pixelated Google Chrome dinosaur pops up on your monitor, announcing that you have no internet connection. Furrowing your eyebrows, you try to reload the page before trying to re-establish your laptop connection to your wifi. Unfortunately, you cannot find your appropriately named ādrop it like itās hotspotā wifi anywhere to connect to.
And thatās when it hits you. Your landlord had sent out a notice to the entire apartment complex last week about the electricity being powered down today from 4 to 6 p.m. for a maintenance check, and a quick glance at the digital clock on your laptop shows that itās a little past four.
You groan, closing your laptop and flopping back against the couch cushions dramatically. Mark cocks his head, slightly confused, before he pokes you in the arm. āWhatās wrong?ā
āI completely forgot about the scheduled electricity shutdown for the entire building. We wonāt have any wifi for the next two hours.ā You pout, your bottom lip jutting out in the slightest, and Mark doesnāt think itās fair that you get to be this cute and have this much of an effect on his racing heart rate.
āThatās okay, we canā¦ play some board games?ā he suggests offhandedly, pushing away the embarrassing thought and nudging your leg with his, and you smile before a sudden idea occurs to you.Ā
āOr we can still do some Tiktok challenges! What was the challenge you clicked on?ā You quickly sit upright, turning to face your best friend, eyes sparkling in excitement. āI memorized a few of the dance ones already! Was it Renegade? I can teach you that one. Jisung showed me how to do it.ā
āUm,ā he starts, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. His eyes dart everywhere, except you, as he lets out a feigned cough. āIt wasnāt a dance one. It was about, uh, going up to your boyfriendā¦ and um, hugging him... when heās playing video games.ā
āOh.ā You answer lamely, not knowing what to say. You unsuccessfully try to push away the image of you attempting that challenge with your best friend. āThose are really cute.ā
āReally?ā He says doubtfully, wrinkling his eyebrows and fiddling with the frayed sleeve of his sweater. āWouldnāt the dude get mad?ā
You donāt know what suddenly possessed you to do this (youāll have to ask Renjun and his paranormal loving ass later), but you thank whatever demon did for that split second because you find yourself gently grabbing Markās arm and slipping your head underneath it. You swing one leg over his lap and settle down until youāre securely sitting in his lap, bent legs on either side of his hips, hands curled around the soft fabric of his sweater on both sides and resting on top of your thighs. His arms instinctively go around your waist, wrapping around you securely.
You tilt your head to the side slightly, studying the flustered boy in front of you with a teasing, albeit a little anxious, smile on your lips. āAre you feeling mad?ā
Splotches of red litter his cheeks and decorate the tips of his ears, but your best friend furiously shakes his head at your question, bashfully ducking his head afterwards and muttering a soft āNo.ā
You swallow hard, heart pounding erratically in your chest as you timidly ask, āWould you be mad if I do this?ā
Mark looks up at that, confusion written all over his face. His arms start to loosen around your figure, hands now resting on your waist. āIf you do what?ā
You take a deep breath. āThis.ā
You lean in and gently press your lips against his. Mark freezes in shock, and you quickly retreat soon after, gnawing at the inside of your cheek as you wait anxiously for his reaction. Your heart feels like itās about to fall out of your chest and be buried six feet under.
A tiny noise of surprise belatedly escapes from him and crimson spreads across his cheeks like wildfire. His doe eyes are wide and sparkling, staring at you in bewilderment. Your best friend lets out a small laugh of disbelief before a full blown smile breaks out across his face. He gazes at you adoringly, breathing out softly, āIām not mad at that.ā
You perk up at that, draping your arms around his neck as you lean forward, beaming. āReally? Youāre not?ā
āDefinitely not.ā
This time, Mark meets you halfway, his lips slotting against yours perfectly and making you feel tingles up and down your spine. Your eyes are closed, and you are so hyper aware of the way his hands grip your hips, how he tugs you closer, and how his lips chase after yours. The number of butterflies from earlier multiply in your stomach, and you have ascended past cloud nine by now.
When the two of you break apart, your eyes flutter open, and you nudge your nose against his affectionately. The brightest grin blooms on his face once again, and he buries his face in the crook of your neck, muffling his little giggles and hiding the awfully vibrant cerise that rapidly blossoms on his face.
āIs this a good time to tell you congrats for completing your first challenge?ā you say, resting your cheek against the crown of his head. You pull away when he lifts his head up, surprised.
āI wasnāt playing video games though,ā he says slowly, processing your words and thinking back to the challenge that started this all.
āIt was a different challenge. Itās the one that Hyuck did a few weeks ago,ā you confess, and realization dawns on him, his face lighting up for a split second before a look of horror takes over.
āOh, no. Is that why you had your phone recording on the bookshelf?ā Mark asks, dread beginning to cloud his mind.
āYesā¦ā you say slowly, a little perplexed. āWhy? Whatās wrong?ā
āOh my god, I ruined your video,ā he moans, dropping his forehead onto your shoulder. āI saw your phone when I walked in and thought you were filming earlier and forgot to turn it off, so I turned it off for you.ā
When the words finally register in your mind, you canāt stop the laughter from bubbling out of your throat, and he raises his head up to look at you with wide doe eyes at the pretty sound. āIām so sorry! I didnāt mean to!ā
You canāt stop laughing at the situation, and he looks at you worriedly, gnawing on his bottom lip slightly. You force yourself to calm down, a soft chuckle leaving your lips before you beam at him, leaning in and placing the softest kiss on the tip of his nose. āItās okay, Mark. Iām not mad. That video wasnāt important anyway.ā
āBut still,ā he whines before letting out a groan and slapping his hand against his forehead when the realization sinks in even further. āIām such an idiot.ā
āBut youāre my idiot now, right?ā you say teasingly, albeit a little shyly as well, as you reach over to tug his hand away from his face and lace your fingers with his.
āI mean, I kinda thought I was always your idiot,ā Mark laughs softly and a little embarrassedly, eyes averted and cheeks turning pinker than ever. The largest grin spreads across your face at that, and you turn away slightly to hide it. You didnāt think your best friend can possibly be any more endearing, but he manages to prove you wrong every time.
āWell, then now you can add āY/Nās boyfriendā to your resume,ā you say, and he fails to suppress the pleased smile appearing on his face at your remark, his rosy cheeks rising even taller than skyscrapers.
āSo, uh, what sort of job description does that have?ā He gazes at your intertwined hands in wonder, still completely giddy at the reality of you being his best friend and something more.
āSharing hoodies, giving me attention, kissing, holding my hand, going on dates, you know, the basics,ā you answer, squeezing his hand tenderly, and his doe eyes instantly light up. Mark feels a little bolder than before, and it shows when he grins widely and says:
āCan we do number three again?ā
āYes, we can, Eggy Boi.ā
He wrinkles his nose at the name, disgruntled and unimpressed, as he crosses his arms over his chest, sulking. You let out a laugh before leaning in and crashing your lips against his. He immediately relents at that, enthusiastically responding and hugging you closer to him, and you canāt help but smile into the kiss as you feel his own smile appear as well.
At that moment, you decide that you want to change Markās personal brand. Because his should be āabsolutely wonderful, positively amazing, a cute kisser, your boyfriend, and your bestest friend.ā And yes, that is most definitely more than the allotted three words, but again, whoās really counting?
Certainly not you when youāre too preoccupied with kissing your best friend. Correction: best friend and new boyfriend.
One new notification: donutkillmyvibe uploaded a new video!
moominjun commented:
so youāre saying the reason why we didnāt get the highly anticipated best friend challenge video is because @ marklyrawr turned the camera off?
donutkillmyvibe replied: yes š Iām sorry to disappoint everyone š¤§
nanaislove replied: omg no bby itās ok š„ŗš„ŗššššš you didnāt have to make an apology video for that š„ŗšššš
goofys.chuckle replied: yeah itās markās fault. heās the disappointment here š„“
morklyrawr replied: hahahahaha stfu hyuck
tytrack commented:
mark is going through puberty. I apologize
dobunny replied: @.@
goofys.chuckle commented:
are we getting whip(ped)lash pt 2 by eggy boi?
morklyrawr replied: YOUāRE THE ONE WHO STARTED THAT NAME?????
goofys.chuckle replied: uh gotta blast š
showmethemonet replied: @ goofys.chuckle does this mean youāre staying over again?
goofys.chuckle replied: @ showmethemonet yes if you want your super cute, mega talented, very handsome boyfriend to still be alive š„ŗ
showmethemonet replied: @ goofys.chuckle oh my god I didnāt know I was dating bts jin???
moominjun replied: LMFAOOOOO
goofys.chuckle replied: heart š been broke š so many times ā° i donāt know š¤ what to believe šÆ mama š©āā¤ļøāšāš© said š£ itās my fault š¢ itās my fault š¤¦š»āāļøi wear my heart ā¤ļø on my sleeve šŖ i think itās best šš» I put my heart ā¤ļø on ice š§
jenojam commented:
why am I not surprisedā¦ā¦
itsmebetch replied: just mark thingz š
suhprisemf commented:
mark your head looks flat af
jungjaeprince replied: ššš
10velyĀ replied: @ jungjaeprinceĀ be quiet donāt cry
letswonwon commented:
whoop whoop
junguwu commented:
OMG CONGRATS ON YOUR RELATIONSHIP SWEETIE šš
takoyaki_prince commented:
MARK!!!!! you look handsome !! š
jisungpwark commented:
rip to @ donutkillmyvibe ās future videos that mark will ruin. press f in the chat to pay respects šš»
bigheadking replied: F āš»š
peachyangel replied: f š„ŗš„ŗ
yoitslucas replied: F š¤Ŗš¤Ŗš¤Ŗ but glad youāre happy, man ā¤ļø
donutkillmyvibe replied: F š
morklyrawr replied: @ donutkillmyvibe wtf babe????
officialgordonramsay commented:
didnāt i tell you to get back on tinder ?
apado_god commented:
nice ššš»
#nct scenarios#nct imagines#nct fluff#mark scenarios#mark imagines#nct dream scenarios#nct 127 scenarios#mark x reader#mark fluff#nct dream fanfic#mark fanfic#nct angst#nct scenario#mark lee imagines#mark lee#lee minhyung#mark#nct dream#nct 127#nct
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ā³aprilās fool ā”
in which fred weasley is in love with y/n l/n, the girl he happens to tease and insult profusely for her attention.Ā
fred weasley x gryffindor!fem!readerĀ
word count: Ā±4.3kĀ
tw: food, fireworks, pranking, fred being a bully, tad bits of swearing
drop a follow if you wanna see more of this content!!
my masterlist:D
ft. minnie, dumbledore and severus
yeah, your grandmama probably know meĀ
get more bottles, these bottles are lonely
it's a moment when I show up, got 'em sayin', "wow"
aprilās foolĀ
ātomorrow is april fools,ā dumbledore sighs.Ā
āyou know what that means...?ā mcgonagall asks, her voice on edge.
āthe twins,ā snape replies quickly, not even bothered one bit as he sips his dark coffee.
āand their pranks,ā dumbledore dramatically rolls over in his armchair.
āokay and?āĀ
ātheyāre a hazard, severus!ā mcgonagall replies.
āthat doesnāt stop them.ā
āwhat will stop them?ā dumbledore ponders, eyes faint with interest.Ā
āyou still have those weird buzzy fireworks right?ā snape asks.Ā
āof course.ā
āand minnie, you have the cake mix your grandmother gave you?ā
āstill in my cupboard next to the biscuits.ā
āexcellent.ā
y/n l/n listens from the other side of the door, grinning. sheās been called to mcgonagallās lavish office for some business she hopes isnāt trouble, but the conversation the three are deeply invested in piques her interest.Ā
she likes fun. the type of continuous laughter and uncontrollable fits of giggles at noon. thatās why she enjoys the pranks the twins play. theyāre bold, sharp and reckless and have the undoubtable trademark of fred and george on them.
one too a many times sheās been on the receiving end of them. one time the twins had charmed the library so that she and other studious students could not find any books that they wanted or needed for a whole week.Ā
another time, her hair had been dyed bright pink. she wasnāt a fan of it, but tried her best to rock it. it worked. y/n had received many compliments on her bubblegum pink locks.Ā
she laughed it off a lot. whenever something quite embarrassing happened, it was usually funny.Ā
even the snide remarks the older twin always cast her way.
including the time he called her a blackhead. well, multiple times.Ā
āoi, l/n, looking like a blackhead.ā
george had rolled his eyes at his brother before adding kindly,Ā āat least you have nice hair. your tieās always shiny too.ā
she had just laughed,Ā āat least iāve got the blackhead looks to pull pink hair off, weasley, you canāt even pull off ginger hair, and thanks, georgie. love ya.ā
fred had looked taken aback, but y/n still scowls at the memory. she gets she isnāt pretty, but there is a line you donāt cross when trying to insult someone.
he always calls her the most awful nicknames too; body parts that align with her name and random pieces of rubbish she isnāt bothered to remember.
she shakes herself of her thoughts and draws herself up, knocking thrice on the door lightly.
ācome in,ā mcgonagallās calm tone beckons.
āgood afternoon professors!ā she chirps, smiling at all three.
they smile back. even snape. theyāre big fans of the girl, whoās studious but mischievous. albus dumbledore has always thought that y/nās eyes always look like all sheās seen is a beautiful sunset.Ā
ānow you must wonder why i called you here,ā mcgonagall starts.
āyou see, how have you punished the weasley twins when they play all those pranks on you?ā dumbledore eagerly asks.Ā
y/n gives a light laugh,Ā āi just prank them back. i wonāt get detention for this, right?ā she jokes.
they laugh,Ā āof course you will,ā snape jokes back and for a second y/n is surprised that severus snape, the ever so cold potions professor, is cracking jokes. especially to her.Ā
āwell then, i guess i canāt tell you how i prank them back then,ā she drawls dramatically.
āno, no, do tell, weāre, what do you young people say?ā mcgonagall pauses,Ā āahh yes! weāre all ears!ā
y/n bursts out laughing,Ā āokay, i usually do something thatās subtle enough but still very noticeable. they need to be anonymous too, or thatāll start prank wars and iām only looking for short term pleasure really. one time, i dumped a whole bunch of polyjuice potion in both their little goblets. fred became george and george became fred. they were so confused.ā
mcgonagall is impressed.Ā
ācan you bake?ā dumbledore asks and y/n shakes her head for a long time.Ā
ācanāt bake for my sanity.ā
āawesome. that is what i thought too,ā dumbledore answers and y/n smiles.Ā
a single knock sounds. itās proper and formal.Ā
ācome in!ā mcgonagall yells.
draco malfoy in all his glory steps into the room, eyes alight with concern, ever so indifferent.Ā
y/n knows him from quidditch. theyāve become relatively good friends, though she thinks he is very busy with his home life. she also knows that thereās more to him than the facade he has.
āafternoon,ā he nods and gives a charming smile.Ā
ānow, draco, i understand your mother had enrolled you in baking classes,ā snape says.Ā
draco nods.Ā
āyou must bake a cake,ā mcgonagall hands him the cake mix.
she hands y/n the box of fireworks and winks.Ā
āgood day professors! make sure to be at breakfast tomorrow!ā y/n shouts, dragging draco with her to the kitchens.Ā
soon draco is laughing with y/n, at her atrocious puns and lightly placed jokes, finding himself very much happy. heās not interested in her romantically, he simply enjoys her company. heās even sharing some funny stories of his own too.
ā...and i told him, to precisely fuck off.ā
āso thatās how you deal with him!ā
āoh no, he didnāt stop. he kept bugging me.ā
āwhat did you do then?ā
āi cast a muffliato charm on him.ā
y/n bursts into laughter as they pass the gryffindor common room, quickly hiding the box of fireworks in her cloak as she spots two red heads quietly snickering by the fat lady.Ā
they notice the unlikely pair scurrying down the stairs.Ā
āhey, google eyes!ā fred shouts.Ā
y/n doesnāt know fred well enough to decide if that greeting is dedicated to herself, so she continues upon her way.Ā
āweasley,ā draco states.Ā
āhuh?ā y/n fakes oblivion.Ā
draco jerks his head in the way of the twins, where fred is smirking handsomely, leaning against the wall in a model-like fashion.Ā
george is shaking his head in dismay.Ā
āi said googly eyes!ā fred shouts again.
y/n wonāt lie, she thinks fred has undoubtedly good looks and his ginger hair is cute. heās just a terrible person. to her, at least. she knows sheās biased, sheās often seen fred comforting ginny after a bad fight with a boyfriend, and from what sheās heard from alicia and angelina and katie, heās funny too.Ā
she whips out her glasses and stares deadpan at him, before rolling her eyes and running with draco down the stairs, laughing like madmen.
they finish baking late at night, and waving her wand smartly over the cake, y/n produces a charm that will make the fireworks activate as soon as the cake is cut open.Ā
draco smiles as he pipes purple and orange roses, writing aĀ āhappy bday fred and georgeā in chocolate letters.Ā
they add lots of sprinkles, hoping to seem like avid admirers of the twins.Ā
ādoes miss l/n and misters malfoy need any assistance?ā a house elf asks.
draco just about opens his mouth to snap aĀ ānoā when y/n gives him a silencing look.
āthank you rosemarie, but that is not needed, you are welcome to watch and talk with us though,ā y/n politely answers, giving her a grin.Ā
the house elf sniffles,Ā āmiss l/n is too nice! rosemarie will make some hot chocolate for her! pretty hair!ā
y/n laughs,Ā āthank you very much, rosemarie. i think mister malfoy would also like some hot chocolate, with a tiny bit of firewhiskey, if thatās alright with you,ā she winks at draco who just scoffs in reply.Ā
when theyāre finished with the cake and the hot chocolate, y/n enters the gryffindor common room. angelina takes the cake and wraps it up in a box and nice wrapping paper. she sends it flying to the twinsā usual spot on the gryffindor table.Ā
āthanks angie!ā y/n smiles, getting up from the cozy spot near the fire in the common room.Ā
āwhy are you going? weāre staying up till midnight for the twinsā birthday; wanna join?ā angelina asks.Ā
y/n shakes her head,Ā āiām not too close with them, it seems like a rather intimate ceremony,ā she keeps her words fluffy and light. really, she would join any birthday celebration, but she didnāt think she could handle the constant insults and annoying comments fred always made about her. and this would have been completely acceptable if she had done something to any one of the weasleys, but she hadnāt. she even regards ginny weasley as a little sister and was invited to one of ginnyās infamous slumber parties. okay, she might have a little crush on him for his joke-ish nature, but itās nothing she canāt get over. heās out of her league, for sure, she thinks. and terribly rude. she doesnāt understand why she still harbours those feelings for him. maybe because that time adrian pucey was mocking her for herĀ āblood purityā he stood up for her. or that time she hurt herself at quidditch and fred stayed up with her bandaging her wound. he cared when it mattered, she guesses.Ā
āiām sure they would love you there.ā
āfat chance,ā she scoffs,Ā āhave a good night!ā
she goes to her own dormitory up the stairs. sheās well known in gryffindor house, but for different reasons than the twins may be. although sheās close with angie and alicia, sheās not close with the twins. mainly because sheās always studying, playing quidditch, and doing prefect things.Ā
being on a quidditch team with fred weasley is bearable. mainly because sheās the captain.Ā
sheās stopped by a large hand on her shoulder. the owner of the hand swivels and suddenly a grinning fred is revealed.Ā
āwhereāre you going?ā fred weasleyās annoying voice pronounces.Ā
āthe sahara desert,ā she snaps back dryly,Ā āyouāre in the way of my world exploration.ā
āam i, really?ā
āācourse,ā she reigns her attitude in,Ā ānice night, isnāt it?ā
āfor you? never.ā
she scowls. fred watches in utter amusement as she takes a deep breath and charmingly smiles.Ā
ādearest freddie, will you please allow me to get to my dorm so i can have some sleep?ā
fredās heart skips a little at the nickname but shakes his head.Ā
āwhatās the password?ā
y/n sighs.Ā āi donāt know. y/n is a blackhead. googly eyes. whatevers.ā
fred lets out a loud laugh. y/n finds herself trying hard not to laugh with him.Ā
she turns around, ready to find her hufflepuff friend that has a spare bed in their dormitory, knowing fred is really stubborn.
āthatās not the password.ā
āwell, good night.ā she walks off, before intensely diving in a style harry potter himself would be proud of, onto the stairs and running up the dorms laughing.Ā
fred stands at the bottom of the stairs, dumbfounded, his jaw hanging open.Ā
āclose your mouth, flies will be caught,ā he heard the giggling voice of y/n.
āclose yours and youāll look better,ā he insults back.Ā
āoh shut up. we know iām the prettier one. and thatās saying something.ā
the next morning, fred and george wake up to presents, a rowdy common room, and a nice cake sitting waiting for them on the gryffindor table.Ā
for the first time, y/n takes a seat opposite them, her eyes alight with the familiar mischief they always held. she steals glances at the professors, who were beaming down with interest, as if they shared an inside joke. draco malfoy has an odd smirk on his pale face.Ā
all eyes are on them as they cut open the cake. with a bang, fireworks come flying out of the cake in all directions, sending crumbs and icing flying in the air and leaving soot on the twinās faces. their ginger hair is covered neatly with white icing and the fireworks continue for a calamitous five minutes. everyoneās too busy laughing and trying to dodge the flying cake to see that y/n l/n and draco malfoy are laughing quietly in a corner together, both with spells like umbrellas.Ā
fredās eyes, however, are trained on y/n, whoās rolling over in laughter. he quickly casts a scourgify on himself and george, and strides casually over to her and malfoy, the usual lazy smirk on his face as he hearsĀ ādraco ohmygosh that was the best. your cake decos are on point! dāya think heāll ever bully me again?ā. that confirms his suspicions. she did play this prank on him. and it makes him feel fuzzy inside.
his face then contorts into a frown. she thinks he bullies her?Ā
āi wouldnāt say he bullies you, y/n.ā
he smiles. never mind.
ābut it isss! i can assure you, there is absolutely nothing niceĀ ābout being called a frame!ā
fred snorts at the time y/n had been gushing adorably over a picture frame that was embellished with gold and bronze flowers to angelina. he had went over and in an attempt to catch her attention, saidĀ āyouāre a frameā.
sure, he was good at flirting, but not to the girls he really really liked.Ā
āthatās fucking funny,ā malfoy laughs.Ā
āoh shut it draco, your face is funny. but yeah, i should probably ask him to start fresh.ā
he decides to interrupt their conversation.Ā
āask who to start fresh?ā he butts in.Ā
y/n doesnāt even look surprised,Ā āin fact, you, fred, because iām not really sure if iāve done anything wrong to you or anything, and by my memory i donāt think i have and you keep being rude and stuff. if i have, iām really sorry for it and iām sorry that i hurt you and all. if we can yāknow, start over, and maybe be friends?ā she catches the unreadable look in fredās eyes and hesitates,Ā āor maybe not, thatās okay, we donāt need to!ā she gives a small laugh,Ā āer, sorry for ever bringing it up?ā
the earnestness of her tone and the wistful look in her eyes makes fred fall a little harder. ever since he saw her nervously fiddling with her robes in first year, heās been smitten.Ā
thereās a silence. malfoy has slipped off, the sneaky bastard.Ā
fred simply takes y/nās hand, giving her a look as if to ask for permission.Ā
she swallows and nods.Ā
theyāre in the courtyard, which is sunny and light. flowers are blooming everywhere.Ā
ācan i kiss you?ā fred asks.
y/nās eyebrows go up.Ā āwhat?ā
ācan i kiss you?ā fred repeats patiently.Ā
āas in kiss? k-i-s-s?ā y/n asks, eyes wide with suspicion and curiosity.
āyep,ā he chuckles,Ā ācrazy, arenāt i?ā
āyeah, youāre crazy.ā
āreally? can i kiss you?ā
āiāve never really kissed anyone.ā
āi guessed that.ā
her eyebrows furrowed in hurt,Ā āwhatās that supposed to mean?ā
āiāll tell you if you let me kiss you.ā
āthere better be a good reason because i was saving it for someone special.ā
āi need a yes, love.ā
she huffs,Ā āyes.ā she wonāt tell him that she has a crush on him, because to be honest, she still isnāt sure if this is a prank or not.
she surprised when fred tilts her head up ever so gently, a smile on his face.
this kiss is short and sweet. he tastes like cinnamon.
when theyāve let go, fred notices the light pink dusted over her cheeks. he smirks.Ā
āyou have to tell me why you thought iāve never kissed anyone,ā she said, eyes flashing in deep thought.
āsuch a beautiful person as you does not deserve kisses from anyone.ā
ā...āĀ
fred took this as a sign to go on.Ā āthe reason iāve always teased you endlessly is because i want your attention. i didnāt think youād give it to me any other way. if you havenāt noticed, iām in love with you. i think youāre absolutely beautiful, both ways. i love it when you frown and get annoyed, even if you rarely do, i love it when you study so hard your face makes this really concentrated look. i love it especially when you laugh and smile and joke and play pranks. even if theyāre on me.ā
ā...ā she was studying his movements. inside her brain, a frenzy was going on. part of her brain- the ever so optimistic part, was screaming happily, and the logical part was using body language to analyse whether he was lying or not.
eyes? their honey brown colour was glistening with affection and truth, an expression so dainty on his face.Ā
a quaint little smile was on his lips, a small one, a genuine one. it was different to all the other smiles sheād seen him smile.Ā
he wasnāt acting, she decided. if he was, he should take up a job in broadway.Ā
āy/n?ā
her brows were furrowed. sheād never been confessed to as genuinely as this before.Ā
if they started this type of relationship would he still be mean and insult her all the time?
āi-i need time. to figure this out.ā
he doesnāt look disappointed, she thinks. instead he looks down at her with...Ā adoration?
āof course, sweetness, anything, iāll wait for you.ā
she smiles,Ā āthank you, freddie.āĀ
ā
itās been a few days since fredās confessed to her. sheās still unsure if he was joking or not. why?
at this moment, sheās watching him giggle with angelina johnson. it seems like heās forgotten everything and anything. heās gotten closer to her. maybe heās lost feelings for y/n? she canāt blame angie, sheās a wonderful girl. if he likes her, thatās fine too. suddenly her feelings for him become very clear. she like-likes him. and itās a bit too late.
but maybe he doesnāt like angie in that way? maybe heās still into her?Ā
y/n knows molly weasley raises her children with patience. she should trust that fredās waiting for her.Ā
but then again, sheās never gonna be as special as angie johnson. sheās just a ever so polite and outgoing nerd. someone whoās foolish enough to prank. angieās smart, confident and funny and terribly patient. and effortlessly beautiful. sheās got the true gryffindor touch. and angieās been one of fredās best friends since day one. sheās always gonna be number 1.Ā
thatās ok. sheāll accept it. she likes angie anyway. it was probably a joke anyway.Ā
she couldnāt be jealous, just a bit dismayed that it wasnāt genuine. whatever, she thinks. we can just go back to how we were before. or not.Ā
and itās relatively easy. they never really saw much of each other anyway. sheāll get over this tiny little liking.Ā
itāll just be like normal. none of this happened. none of it. she grimaces bitterly, damning fred for his stupid games. shouldāve known this was another of his pranks. but his acting though, certainly very good.Ā
she smiles to herself.
āknock it off, y/n, youāre here to learn, not to love.ā
and that answer, is satisfactory.Ā
she gets up from her spot on the gryffindor table rather abruptly, saying goodbye to her friends, and makes her way to the kitchens. she knows she wonāt be alone, sheāll talk to hansel and gretel, the twins that cook with the house elves every dinner.
theyāre cleaning up as she walks in, book in hand.Ā
āhi hans, g!ā she calls, as she rolls up the sleeves of her sweater to help them with the dishes.Ā
āy/n!ā gretel gives her a hug with soapy arms and y/n giggles.
āhow are both of you?ā y/n asks.Ā
āgood, good, potions though...ā hansel trails off and they all laugh.
āpotions is always like that,ā y/n agrees,Ā āitās supposed to be really hard for newts, so you canāt really blame the subject.ā
āiām thinking of dropping divination,ā gretel says.
āyeah, thatās wise, gretel buns,ā hansel teases and gretel scowls.Ā
ādivination is an easy subject, gretel, you just need to make random stuff up. i saw this weird bear thing in pollyās tea leaves, it wasnāt in the textbook. i told trelawney it was a symbol that a stranger would come and whip polly off her feet, with a whip the colour of the rarest german emeralds, leaving her absolutely smitten. i got full marks,ā y/n laughs.Ā
they laugh too, and soon a light flowing conversation is shared over cups of hot chocolate.Ā
this is repeated for quite a few days and y/n even invites polly, marla and lenox, her best friends, to join. itās a delicate, nice kind of week, one that suits her current struggles.Ā
when the weekends roll around, hansel and gretel suggest that they all sit at the hufflepuff table. they share jokes and quips over the food, y/n reading a book as she bites happily into apple pie.
āpfft,ā her lips upturn ever so slightly at the quote that the character makes.Ā
fred watches her from the gryffindor table, utterly confused. y/nās been avoiding him. he sees the flashes of hurt that run through her eyes whenever she sees him, and the quick grin thatās far too fake that follows. sheās been reading a lot more and he never sees her anymore.Ā
he wonders what heās doing wrong. so as he sees her walking with her friends to hogsmeade, he calls for her.Ā
āy/n!ā
her friends giggle as they see him, but she gives him a fleeting glance and raises her eyebrows at them, shaking her head, before profusely apologising to each one of them.
she approaches him warily, with all practicality in mind. she leads with her heart, but her head protects her.Ā
fool me once, shame on you.
fool me twice, shame on me.
āyouāve been avoiding me,ā he states.
āwhat would you expect?ā she snaps,Ā āisnāt this all a good laugh for you anyway?ā
āwhatās that supposed to mean?ā
āyou know what i mean, this was all a joke, wasnāt it? fooling my poor little heart which you know has a crush on you. my head simply wonāt allow it. admit it, and we can both move on with our lives,ā her tone is sharp and cold, her eyes burning with fury and hurt,Ā āi may seem gullible, and i am,ā she gave a short laugh,Ā ābut when i notice, donāt even try to lie.ā
āthis wasnāt a joke, love.ā
ādonāt call me that, and you and i both know it is. your acting though, absolutely superb!āĀ
āwhat makes you think this was a prank, y/n? you were the one who asked for time.ā
āyes, and the time made me realise that i had feelings for you despite all the teasing AND the fact you couldnāt possibly be genuine!ā y/n says exasperatedly, her fury dissolving quickly,Ā āyou looked so in place with angie and everyone that itās so obviously some sort of fun thing you did to try to get back at me!ā
āangie?ā
āa-and everyone else.ā
āangie?ā fredās eyes were amused.
āyou know, angelina, as in johnson.ā
āangie?ā
y/n shrugs,Ā āyou did bring her to the yule ball last year.ā
āangie??!!!ā fred was full on smirking now, as if trying to receive a real response.Ā
āi think you like her, okay?! are we done here? iād very much like a good book from f&b,ā y/n sighs.Ā
āiāll accompany you to flourish and botts. why would you think i like her? didnāt i just confess to you?ā
āyeah but it seemed kinda...ā y/n trails off, not wanting her insecurities to come off as compliment fishing,Ā ākinda far-fetched.ā
āmeaning?ā fred knows exactly what she means.
āyou know!āĀ
āoh but i donāt,ā he smiles innocently.
āwell, youāre you!āĀ
āis that supposed to be an insult?ā he asks, faking a look of hurt rather well as y/n looks alarmed.Ā
āno, no, as in, youāre nice to look at, and youāve always insulted me and been so nice and cool to everyone. are you for real?ā
ānice to look at?ā a cocky grin is on his face now, much more noticeable than the slight blush that was creeping up his face.
āis that the only thing you could pick up?āĀ
ānice to look at? whatās up with me repeating myself today?ā
y/n lets out an agitated sigh. he doesnāt know, heās blunt and straightforward. she likes cushioning her words.
āyāknow, handsome? good looking?ā
āmy middle names.ā another smirk to conceal the blushing.Ā
y/n smiles.Ā āof course, everyone knows it.ā
it makes fred uncomfortable. her light tone is a bit menacing too.Ā
āonly joking.ā
āiām sure everyone does know it, darling.ā
y/n is too busy looking at the dog that passes by to hear him, rambling quietly to herself over the cute scottish terrier.
āsorry, what was that?ā
āarenāt i cuter than the dog?ā
ānup.ā
āreally?ā fred casually slings an arm over y/nās shoulders, having to stoop a little lower to reach her.
āi think so.ā
āwell iāll tell you something love, i think youāre absolutely stunning.ā
āsome love potion youāre on.ā
āuh huh, the love potion is called love, sweetness.ā
āso youāre for real?ā
āas real as you and me.ā
āyouāre cheesy. this isnāt a prank right?ā
ānot at all, i love you.ā
āi-i donāt think i love you just yet, but i think itās possible,ā y/n bites her lip, anxiously awaiting his response.
she tilts her head to look at him.Ā
heās beaming. he looks more handsome than ever, a sweet smile etched on his face as he looks down at her in utter adoration.
āyou have a crush on me!ā he pulls her into a hug and giggles like a little girl, kissing the top of her head.
sheās engulfed by the smell of burning wood and cinnamon and immediately feels safe in his strong arms.Ā
āhowād you say we go on a date? so i can show how sorry i am for all the times i called you googly eyes and played pranks on you.ā
āiāll check to see if the girls are okay with it,ā y/n replies, turning her head to see her friends. theyāre gone.Ā
āthey are. i asked them to shoo off before i approached you. is that a yes?ā
y/n nods,Ā āof course, freddie.ā
āi love you.ā
she laughs,Ā āyou really are aprilās fool.ā
āiām your aprilās fool.āĀ
he buries his nose in the crook of her neck to stop her from seeing his blushing red face.Ā
#fredweasley#fred weasley x y/n#frederick weasley#fred weasley x reader#gryffindor#hansel and gretel#fanfic#harry potter#hogwarts#hufflepuff#angelina johnson#alicia spinnet#y/n#harrypotter#hogsmeade
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Hi! My birthday is on Easter, so I was wondering if I could get something with Kuroo, Kenma, and Atsumu forgetting it was their s/o's birthday due to to it being another holiday? An angst to fluff if possible. Thanks so much!!
bday today - kuroo, kenma & miya
warnings: none
kuroo tetsuro
kenma kozume
miya atsumu [masterlist]
hey hey hey! happy happy birthday hon, sorry itās quite late but i hope yah had a great day and that no one forgot yah special day! heheh.
You rub the sleep from your eyes as your body begins to wake itself, you were extra happy today, it was Easter Sunday and your birthday. Rolling over the bed to face your partner but youāre met with empty space, sitting up you notice a note neatly folded on his side. Excitedly thinking it was a cute morning birthday greeting, expect it wasnāt a cute birthday greeting you were hoping.
ābabe there was an urgent meeting at the company, Iāll see you later.
oh can you buy chocolate Easter bunnies for our nieces to bring later.ā
You stare at his messy handwriting, confusion clouding your expression, for sure he wouldnāt forget your birthday youāve been married since you graduated university and not once has he forgotten your day. You shake your head denying the thought that he forgot, youāre sure that heāll call you, he did say the meeting was urgent, something big mustāve happened in the company but still he wouldnāt forget. Sighing in defeat you throw the covers off yourself and started preparing for the day.
Dressing up in a white sundress and pulling on your heels, youāre out the door and heading to the nearest shopping center. A smile graces your features at the selection of chocolate bunnies, they had them in different flavours and sizes, momentarily forgetting the sadness of your forgotten birthday but a little cat chocolate catches your attention and the sadness seeps in you. Reminding you of a certain dark haired male who has forgotten your birthday, pouting you purchase the chocolates nearly breaking them, stupid Easter overtaking your special day. Just as you got into the busy trains, your phone buzzes and a hopeful feeling fills you but yet again no peep about your birthday, you were now convinced he forgot.
āDid you get the chocolates? Iāll meet you at your momās place and letās drop them off together, love youā
Finally arriving at your parents place, you looked around and Kurooās car was no where in sight, your frown deepens and as you huff in frustration. Pulling out your phone and quickly dropping him a text.asking where he was, he replies surprisingly quick.
āSorry babe, caught in traffic. Go in ahead, so youāre not waiting in the street.ā
Annoyed that he hasnāt remembered your special day, you enter your parents home, grumbling as you step foot into the threshold before a loud popping sounds rips a scream from your chest.
āSurprise!ā
You jump in surprise as the smiling faces of your family greets you, tears form at the corner of you eyes as your family walks over to greet you and give you hugs. After everyone had given you their greetings there standing with the brightest smile was your husband. He slowly walks up to you with his arms open wide, āHappy Birthday, sweetheart.āyou snuggle into his chest, tears falling from your eyes, āYouāre so mean Tetsu, you made me think you forgot.āyou pull away a pout settling on your lips.
His melodious laugh is contagious and a smile overtakes your features, āYou know I would never.āhe tilts your chin up and your lips meet in a sweet kiss, āI wanted to give you a good surprise.āyou had the biggest smile as you pushed your lips hardest against him and his hands settle on your hips.
āI love you so much sweetheart.ā
āKenma Kenma Kynnnmaaa!āyou hop over to your hunched over boyfriend, eyes trained to his glowing monitor as his fingers rapidly press buttons on the controller. A smile gracing your features as you approach him and the victory banner flashing across the screen, perfect timing. āKynma, come letās have breakfast.āyou peck the soft cheek of your partner and he pulls the headphones of his head allowing himself to be pulled by you.
You had prepared a big big breakfast for your birthday to share together, knowing you and Kenma you were both huge homebodies so you just wanted to spend your birthday cuddled up together. āWhatās with all the food?āKenma asks as you both reach the dining table, face contorted in confusion, you stare at him. Was he making a joke, it was your birthday maybe he had a surprise for you. āDo you know what today is Kenma?āyou ask your boyfriend but his face was genuinely confused, āitās Easter Sunday?āhe says unsurely as if questioning you.
āAnd?ā
āAnd what? Is there something Iām missing?āthis time he looks to you and you feel slight annoyance and sadness brewing in your gut, you knew he can get too immersed in his games but you expected him to give you the respect of remembering your birthday. You actually feel heartbroken that tears begin to form and are threatening to spill down your face. āItās my birthday Kozume.āyou drop his arm and turn to your bedroom, tears now freely falling, shutting the door and turning the lock as you slide down, silently crying.
āPudding, Iām sorry. It completely slipped my mind.āKenma softly knocks on your shared bedroom room, his voice quiet and full of regret. āGo away Kenma, I wanna be alone.āyou sobbed out, as you wiped your tears and curling in a feral position by the door, āI thought I was Kynnma.āhis voice shook and your heart clenched but you were too upset to care why was he hurt. It was his fault he forget your birthday, you always made the effort to remember all his game releases and any special event revolving around his life.
āHmph! I donāt know you, go leave.āyou spat at him and you hear him sigh in defeat, ākitten come on come out, this is my house too.āhe begs as you hear him slide down the door and sit, āThen go play your games.āyou bit back, purposely kicking the door earning a groan from Kenma. āI donāt want to, I want you to come out.āyou ignore him and allowed the silence to envelope the both of you, your eyes become heavy and you begin to drift off, crying had drained you and thinking of Kenma hurt you even more.
ā(your name)ā
ā(your name)ā
āKittenā
ā(your name)ā
āKitten.āyou stir awake, eyes heavy from crying and back aching from sleeping on the floor, everything comes back to you and you become upset again but you just wanted to cuddle Kenma and as much as you hate that he forget, you love him too much.
āLet me make it up to you, what you do want? Please Kitten open the door.āyou almost felt bad that you had made him beg for this long but you were upset and hurt. You got up from you position and slowly open the door, peeping your head out, his figure was slumped against your bedroom door and his head buried between his hands.
āCuddle me.āyou answer and his head shoots up, eyes meeting yours he scrambled to his feet and taking you in his arms, āIām really sorry Kitten, I know being busy isnāt an excuse.āhis lips meet your head, arms tightly wound around you, he carries you to your shared bed cuddling.āI booked a week vacation for us, Iām all yours kitten. Iām sorry forgetting.āHe presses sweet kisses to your neck and whispering his apologies and promises.
āBecause I love you I forgive you but if you do it again, itās another story.ā
*ding*
Your ears perk up from the sound of your phone, you excitedly run to your phone and swiping it open, you pout when you read over the name, it wasnāt who you were hoping it was. It was Osamu, wrong twin.
ā(your name)-chan! Happy Birthday Idiot #2! Come by the shop Iāve got a special onigiri for you!ā
A sad smile graces your lips, at least someoneās greeted you, shutting off your phone you sigh in sadness as you get changed to meet up with Osamu.
*ding*
Another notification pops up and your eyes lights up at the sight of your partnerās name, clicking the message.
āHey bunny, happy Easter. I got chocolate bunnies sent to the apartment, I know you love them so much. Miss you, call me later Kay?
love you babyā
Like clockwork, the doorbell rings, low and behold the delivery man from your favourite chocolaterie hands you a neatly wrapped package. Your frown deepens, it wasnāt just Easter. it was your fucking birthday too, you grovel as tears prick at your eyes. Is he serious? Did he really not remember, upset you donāt reply, shutting your phone and leaving it on airplane mode, hmph you decided to ignore your setter boyfriend. The soft jingle of the shop door sounds in the restaurant and Samu turns to you with a smile, you give him a weak one followed with your dead greeting.
āHe only greeted me happy Easter, what the fuck is that?āyou moan in sadness as Osamu sets down your special onigiri, āI canāt believe he forgot, is he that busy?ā
āMy brother might be an idiot but he wouldnāt forget your birthday, he loves you.āSamu tries to brighten your mood but it does nothing to make you feel better, āDoes he? I know heās busy and all but at least a fucking text or a call to greet me wouldāve been nice.āyou grumpily take a bite of the special ongiri Osamu made just for you. You sigh in frustration, angrily chewing the rice ball, it was so good but you couldnāt enjoy it like you wanted. Stupid Atsumu for making you feel this way, did he really forget about your birthday. āUgh, Samu Iām sad.āyou pout and lay your head on the counter, Osamu pats your head, cooing at your saddened state, after spending your afternoon with the grey haired counterpart you decided to head home, he sent you off with more onigiri for dinner.
āThanks for spending my birthday with me Samu.āhe pats your head one more and sends you off with a smile, you were at least glad Osamu was nice enough to keep you company, trudging your way home. Sighs of disappointment ever leaving your lips, turning on your phone there hasnāt been a message from Atsumu since this morning, great now itās like heās forgotten you. Defeatedly sliding your keys in the lock you sluggishly push your door open.
āDid you really think I forgot your birthday?ā
The all so familiar voice of your boyfriend pulls you out of your thoughts, raising your head you meet his warm chocolate eyes, there he was standing infront of you with a beautifully decorated cakeĀ in hand and the prettiest smile on his lips. You drop your bag as tears fall from your eyes, he sets aside the cake and opens his arms for you to run into them, āYouāre here! How?āyou bury your face in his toned chest, not believing that your boyfriend was home.
āI wanted to surprise you, so I flew in.āhis lips press soft kisses all over your face, allowing a bright smile to sit on your lips, āI love you Tsumu.āyou finally meet his lips, the kissing professing your love to him, you might have been sad this morning but fuck his lips make up for everything. He lifts you up and youāre legs automatically circle his waist, āArenāt i the best boyfriend?āhe tease you and your roll your eyes but he truly was, you were over the moon, kissing him again before darting out your tongue to tease the setterās lower lip, hinting him of what you wanted.
āHappy Birthday Bunny! I wouldnāt miss it for the world.ā
//
sorry iāve been missing these past few days, sorry but iām taking a break, its pretty abrupt and short notice but my minds in the gutter right now. hope you all still enjoy the stuff i write, leave a like and comment if you did. might move some of my works over to ao3 but idk, have a great day. jaa ne!
all the love xx
#hq kuroo#kuroo headcanons#Kuroo Tetsuro#kuroo tetsuro x reader#kuroo x reader#kuroo oneshot#kuroo imagine#hq kenma#Kenma Kozume#kenma x reader#kenma kozume x reader#kenma headcannons#hq miya atsumu#Miya Atsumu#miya atsumu x reader#miya x reader#kenma x you#haikyuu!!#haikyuu#hq headcannons#hq x reader#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu x you#haikyuu x y/n#haikyu x reader#haikyuu headcannons#haikyuu scenarios#kuroo x you#haikyuu fluff
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ok detective time š
šµļøāāļøšµļøāāļø
I think Vs new man is that mark guy she met in Puerto Vallarta. Heās a pisces and it looks like he was in chicago when the werq tour was there and she started posting about the new man with Rihannaās bday. V followed all his friends and commented on their photos that have him in and liked a bunch of photos on his IG. I think hes the guy on her left in her recent tiktok thats just blurry panning around the club, the point of it was probably to tease showing him. Heās definitely the guy doing Hugh Hefner couples costume with her in the last photo of her new post. Looks like he flew to new york to do halloween with her. And I think the cat kissing a fish cartoon on her stories is meant to be her kissing a pisces.
To be honest heās probably just a rebound, the fact that V is being so vocal about him this early when sheās known for not liking to share about relationships sounds like she still cares what jack thinks or what people think about her and jack and is trying to prove something like that sheās moved on or he wasnāt special or provoke a reaction from him or something. Seeing that jack is liking tweets about them again I wouldnāt be surprised if V is messaging him privately bragging about finding someone else or at least dropping hints š Plus she only just stopped wearing jacks seashell necklace every day like 2 weeks ago.
Maybe V is trying to make the new guy feel like more than it is being over the top about love in the air and stuff already to help herself move on from being actually in love that didnt work out. Or maybe thatās just how V is with boys at the start, we know she can be dramatic and romantic and go into things head first lol. From one of the stories the new guy posted when they were in Puerto Vallarta it sounded like he maybe recently had a break up too? So they might relate to each other?
The guy is super pretty he looks like Vs usual type except for not being tall and seems like a nice and sweet person as far as I can tell from his IG. Hard to tell much about his personality cause he doesnt post much, he seems kinda basic from what he has posted so hopefully in person he is fun and interesting enough for her. Or maybe its enough for her that heās hot if heās just a rebound lol. Looks like heās into the outdoors so if V starts nature hiking soon we know why lol! but if weāre placing bets i donāt see it lasting tbh. hope V is happy and having fun tho! They look good together. But then V always looks good!! š
Ok detective report over and out š
šµļøāāļøšµļøāāļø if anyone else has news or theories keep us updated lol š
Come on detective, werk! Thanks for your service.
The guy in V's latest photo is a pisces soo it could be the one she talked about.
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HSMTMTS 2x05 Review
The QuinceaƱero was a truly historic ep featuring the first time two boys have ever kissed on a Disney show. Letās dig in!
We got the second same-sex kiss in Disney history tonight, Big Shot had the first last Friday, and the first kiss between two boys in Disney history. Itās a huge step forward. Thatās not to say that Disney is going to start approving more same-sex kisses or lgbtq relationships or characters but the door is now open and at least some other shows and movies will be able to eventually follow in HSMTMTS steps.
Really nice cover of The Climb, Joe has such a great voice. It was cute that young Seb had watched young Carlosā dance vid and felt inspired. Frankie and Joe being an irl couple certainly helps give Seblos a good rapport but it also helps that creator and showrunner Tim Federle is an openly gay man himself. I think if a straight man was showrunner we probably wouldnāt get such dedication to Seblos as a couple.Ā
It was a really funny ep too:Ā Carlos saying his love language is riddles, Ricky asking Nini who they talk to when doing their confessionals, Carlos saying Miss Jenn was a master of smoke and mirrors, Benjamin Mazzara and Mike Bowen interacting. My personal favourite gags were when Big Red said he always wanted a nickname and Kourtney immediately did an office stare and when Nini said Picasso was a terrible person.
Gina still going through it. Kourtney is right that it doesnāt really make sense that Gina is now going to all this trouble for Carlos but to be honest the writing and pacing has been disjointed so far this season so a lot of things arenāt flowing as well as they need to. Is what Gina regrets convincing Ricky to go back on stage as that helped get Rini back together? Thatās petty but fair and also true to teenage emotions (though she shouldnāt beat herself up too much, Rini were clearly on the path to getting back together by that point anyway).
Jesus Christ, Ricky needs to read the room. Last ep he correctly realized that Gina wouldnāt want to hear about his Nini issues and tried to stop Big Red from mentioning them but now heās just doing it himself? Obviously theyāre trying to drill in the fact that for now Rina is one sided but itās a little much. Also really doesnāt make sense that Ricky wouldnāt go to Kourtney or Big Red for this kind of advice.
Sofia Wylie was killing it this ep, both her and Joe are showstoppers. A Dancerās Heart was great and she did a good job of acting on the verge of tears almost the entire ep
At least EJ actually thought to ask Gina how sheās feeling though and she clearly appreciated it after she got over her shock. It does seem that reports of Portwellās demise were greatly exaggerated, with the music and the longing stares theyāre setting up for at least EJ to have a crush on Gina. Hell even Mazzara picked up on it at the end. I had noted last week that it seemed like Ginaās story line in S2 was being thrown out of balance by the writers dropping a planned Portwell plot and sure enough this week we actually begin to see Ginaās story arc not being entirely her pining over Ricky.Ā
EJ also benefits by being given something to do instead of just standing around in the back. Iām glad he took Mazzara up on the AV club offer and they have a nice mentor-mentee relationship going on. Itās also a nice little parallel with 1x05 when Gina told off EJ and had a moment with Ricky and now in 2x05 Gina tells off Ricky and has a moment with EJ.Ā
Matt seemingly dismissed Portwell as a friendship rather than even hinting at something between them. I guess he could have been told to keep it under wraps as much as possible but odd that they wouldnāt hype it a bit; itās not like this came completely out of left field, people were wondering if Portwell might happen because of the moment they had in 1x10 and the facetime call they had before S2. Sofia has already said that Gina will have love interests this season and EJ being one, even if itās brief, would make whole lot of sense since thereās really no one else for except Jack who only shows up much later and doesnāt seem to be in more than an ep or two.
Rini was sweet tonight. Yes Ricky is being clingy which stems in large part from his momās abandonment and in fairness Ricky and Nini have probably been used to spending much of their time with each other since they were kids. Loved thatĀ āI think you kinda you knowāā call back tonight. Looks like Nini will be cast as the Rose which should be interesting.
Miss Jenn is pulling Mike Bowen, Ben Mazzara, and Zach Roy. Good for her! Jike shippers certainly feasted tonight as Mike crashed a teen bday party just to see Miss Jenn and we got confirmation that everyoneās fave Disney Dilf was born in the 70s and must be no older than 51.
Well gotta love Lilyās commitment to bringing down East High and drinking scalding hot black coffee. She really seems like she just stepped off the set of Glee
Really hope we see those puppies and man was that wolf adorable
Not both HSMTMTS and Love Victor both making Okay Boomer jokes (it worked when Pilar said it to Felix but not when Ricky said it to his dad)
Big Red exposing Kourtney and Howie was good and it looks like their plot kicks into high gear next ep
Bet Tim thought he was real clever for that shot of Mazzara, Mike, and Miss Jenn in a triangle
A well shot ep except for one weirdĀ and abrupt cut from Mazzara saying Caswell to Seblos outside the barn
Looking Ahead:
EJ stopping Gina from leaving would certainly further their relationship and would parallel him being the one to bring her back in S1. I still donāt get why they didnāt just use the Valentineās chocolates as a plot device to further this plot; just have EJ secretly send them as he was also lonely and you can still have Gina think they were from Ricky.
From what Iāve seen online this Portwell hint has been controversial. Itās true that thereās an age gap between the characters of 2ish years and a much bigger one between the actors but I donāt think that will stop Tim as he already had EJ date Nini. Iāve also seen comments that it would be a bad idea since EJ is leaving at the end of S2 once he graduates but heās not actually leaving, theyāll keep him around in some fashion until the current juniors graduate.Ā
So far it seems like Rini is the Rucas of hsmtmts, Rina is the Lucaya, and Portwell is the Joshaya.
Kowie starts progressing a bit next ep and we may possible see Antoine next week or the week after according to Larry.
Presumably Rickyās clinginess starts causing trouble between him and Nini.
Still so funny that North High just up and decided to do Beauty and the Beast just to bring down East High.
Until next week wildcats
#HSMTMTS#Seblos#Rini#Portwell#seb matthew smith#Carlos Rodriguez#Gina Porter#EJ Caswell#Ricky Bowen#HSMTMTS Reviews
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Willās fear of clowns
*Ps -not mine. this is a submission from an anon. tw: for s.a. Itās an interesting submission. ANON-please make a tumblr account already . Iām begging you XD
Hi! Itās me, Lonnie Meth Anon. Back with more depressing thoughts about Lonnie!
I just read your post on Jonathanās ab*se at the hands of Lonnie, and I second it all. It breaks my heart. But it also got me thinking deeper about Willās fear of clowns. I think youāre right that part of the horror for Will is that the clown attacks in bed. The bed is, obviously, like you say, a common site for s*xual assault. (Doesnāt Elās picture of āthree legged Brennerā also have a bed in it? In a picture with not much else?) The fact that Will needed Joyce to sleep with him for a week suggests he was specifically feeling unsafe in bed, or at night.Ā
But maybe itās not just the location of the attack in Poltergeist that Will found so harrowing. Maybe itās the combination of that location with the fact of a clown being the attacker.Ā
I think Lonnie might have dressed up as a clown for Willās birthday one year, and something happened.Ā
In this instance, I donāt think Joyce would know what happened. I think the incident in her mind would be something like āLonnie dressed up and Will was scared of the costumeā. She might even have thought it was cute. Just a typical little kid fear of something mundane. When she teases him about Poltergeist, she doesnāt actually say the movie was the START of his fear of clowns. Just that he was afraid of that particular clown. The general fear of clowns could have been an older one, going back to when Will was even younger.
Maybe Will even liked clowns, before whatever happened with Lonnie turned them into a source of fear for him. Will has a lion plushie (lions are commonly found in the circus) and the circus seems like the kind of vibrant, colorful environment full of outcast, that a young gay kid would really enjoy. If Will did like circuses and Lonnie poisoned that for him, thatās just another reason to hate Lonnie. But it definitely seems possible.Ā
Lonnie is a deadbeat dad in general, but weāve seen before that heās capable of faking the āfamily manā act in front of Joyce and their neighbors. Weāve also seen that even though he treats Will horribly, he would also try and keep Will on his side with father son bonding activities, like baseball. And Willās birthday is one of the few occasions Lonnie makes a half-assed kind of effort, even when thereās nothing directly in it for him. He sends that card, even though itās late. Maybe Joyce made called him up and made him send it, but she always seemed happy to keep Lonnie out of the picture. She didnāt even want to involve him when Will went missing. And we know Jonathan would never try and facilitate more interactions between Lonnie and Will. So it seems like Lonnie did this of his own accord, when he realized heād missed the day. Kind of weird. And itās classic abuser behavior, to make contact on an anniversary date, reminding you they exist and you canāt escape them. Reminding you to keep quiet. Or hoping youāll miss them, remember the āgood timesā when they made an effort, and let them back into your life. (Ugh.)
So, anyway, back to my theory. Young Will likes circuses, and the Byers family are poor, so they canāt afford to take him to one, or throw him a party at an ice cream parlor or a bowling alley, like other kids. It makes sense that they would have a party at home instead, and that the family themselves might dress up. We know Joyce made Willās Ghostbusters costume in season two, and a clown is a pretty easy costume. Most of it is just make up. Itās possible the whole thing was Joyceās idea, and she made the costume, and Lonnie just went along with it to look like a good dad in her eyes.Ā
Remember how we see Bob (Willās new father figure) dressing up in costume for Halloween? Joyce loves it. This is a thing good dads do, to have fun with their kids. Thatās also the same episode we see Will scared by a guy in a clown costume, and Jonathan is hyper-protective of him that night. School is okay, but he doesnāt want him trick or treating. (Like he knows that school is a safe environment, but in other contexts, costumes and parties might be a trigger for Will.) Jonathan is convinced to leave Will and ālet him have funā and what happens? The clown attacks. Later that night Jonathan goes to a costume party himself, where he finds Nancy upset and takes her safely home.Ā Maybe this is how Willās birthday party ended - with Jonathan finding Will upset, and trying to comfort him. The whole night could be playing out like a parallel to that birthday party, from Jonathanās perspective.Ā
What actually happened with Will and Lonnie is up for debate. Itās possible there was a s*xual assault, and thatās why the clown scene in Poltergeist was such a trigger for Will. Or maybe Lonnie thought circuses werenāt āmanlyā enough for his son to like, and actively tried to scare Will, so he wouldnāt like them anymore. Itās hard to know. Something would have happened though, and probably something pretty formative, because the fear of clowns lasts a long time.Ā
Something else interesting is that when Mr Clarke is talking about the Upside Down in season one, he uses the metaphor of the flea and the acrobat. Acrobats are a main act in the circus, and, well ā¦ fleas. Flea circuses. Thatās a thing. Maybe itās a hint that the trauma that created the Upside Down was circus / clown - related?
Kali, El, and their gang wear clown masks too, when theyāre going to confront their childhood trauma, and the child-like Alexei is surrounded by clowns when he is killed at the fair.Ā
Clowns are just so associated with birthday parties and little kids, that it doesnāt seem like a coincidence to me theyāre Willās biggest fear. Especially as the show keeps dropping hints about Lonnie and Willās birthday. It feels like thereās more to the story. I have a horrible feeling SOMETHING happened.Ā
RESPONE (kaypeace):
I think itās very possible-that maybe he did dress as a clown for Willās birthday and something happened. We have alexi (paralleled to Will) playing carnival games with kids. Then he's attacked by the Lonnie-look alike : and alexi looks at his wound then stares at all the clowns laughing around him. Joyce and Murray find Alexi bleeding/dy*ng next to a clown statue. As joyce looks in horror and Murray says to her, he was āonly gone for a secondāĀ (which sounds like something youād say in relation to a kid you were supposed to watch-running off ). We also had sarah at age 7 die while wearing a gown with clowns on it (Will: it was a 7 the demogorgan it got me). Death of innocence symbolism? Hopper also describes his depression as a cave- he goes through the carnival ride where it mentions a "cave of horrors", which had decor of a tiger and a clown painting. So yeah... whatever happened probably isn't good. So- there may be some symbolism there in relation to Willās past. Not only because (like I and you have mentioned before) Lonnie is highly associated with birthdays. And canonically we know he mentally scarred jonathan on his b-day. But also, s4ās āvictor creelā may be an easteregg to the xmen character victor creed- who had a tradition of tra*matizing family members specifically on their bdays
As another alternative:I could also totally see Lonnie āruiningā circuses for Will because itās not āmanlyā to him. Like how Jonathan liked thumper the rabbit-from the film bambi. in the film, Thumper is bambiās bff, and the hunters are the bad guys who k*ll Bambiās mother and terrorize all the wildlife. SO yeah- making Jonathan become a hunter, and k*ll a rabbit ,despite this fact, is really messed up. And shows Lonnie has already tried to āruinā things the boys like. By mentally scarring them in one way or anotherā¦
I also mentioned how Willās bday could even be a trigger for jonathan in a diff post.
if the s4 bts calender hinting itāll be near Willās bday and easter it could be relevant to Jonathan.we know in s1 el has tra*matic flashbacks when seeing certain things- coke, closet, cat, etc. And Will in s2 has his āanniversary effectā where memories flood back based on the time of year.But like ā¦ Easter has bunnies - could seeing rabbits jog stuff up for Jonathan? El seeing a cat made her have a flashback of brenner trying to make her kill a cat. Would Jonathan seeing like Easter bunny decor jog up a flashback of lonnie making him kill a rabbit? (It happened on his bday too). So Willās b day being around easter would only fuel that memory. (heck even popped balloons may trigger gunshot symbolism idk). And then for Will there is clowns that could be a tr*gger at a party.
The flea and the acrobat analogy (in relation to Will and circuses is very interesting) and could be foreshadowing- itās even a title for an episode so I feel like itās narratively an important hint to ā¦something. similar to a s1 ep being calledĀ āthe bathtubā.Ā Also, Will was compared to a circus flea- which were placed in an enclosed space, where heat was applied as they jumpedĀ and tried to escape the increasing temperatures as they burned .Which could relate to my theory about Will having a se*zure due his body overheating due to Lonnie injecting him with m*th.
Ā If Willās bday is in s4- I feel like Lonnie will come back in some capacity (flashback or literally). The āsorry, I forgot you b dayā card from Lonnie in s2, in Lonnieās shed Joyce mentioning Willās b day, the rainbow āhappy birthday cupā placed next to Will at Mikeās -while Will explains the supernatural, Lonnie already tra*matizing Jonathan on his bday, etcā¦
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Make the day better.
summary: Y/N's son turns five and Harry doesn't know what to give him.
word count: 2.5k
Based on these requests:
"could you do artemis first bday with harry or christmas??"
and
"Love your writing. I have a request please, celebrating a birthday, could be Y/N, Harry or Artemis birthday"
and
"Can you do a blurb in the single mom series where Artemis is watching videos on YouTube but he sees harry in his 1d days and watches those vids and Artemis really likes and thinks one of the 1d boys are cool and stuff so harry does stuff to make Artemis happy, like maybe call that member or something? Sorry if it's trash I don't mind if you just throw it in the binš"
and
āI have an idea! For my shy little boy, could you do something about the moment that makes Harry realize he wants to keep y/n and Artemis forever and decides heās going to marry her and hopefully adopt the little boy one day? Love your writing!!ā
you can find more of my shy little boy here
a/n: saw these pictures and immediately thought about our little family. enjoy!
š š šš š šš š š
December, 2018.
Artemis has discovered something new.
He has discovered old videos from Harry from when he was in the band. At first, he was confused as to why Harry wasnāt alone in the videos he watched like in the ones he was used to see. So Artemis did what always did when he was confused: ask.
Conveniently, Harry was invited to dinner at their house, and the first thing Artemis did when he crossed the door, was tell him. āHarry, I saw you on the TV!ā
āYou did? Did I look good?ā He asked cheekily, sitting next to him on the sofa.
āWatch!ā He turned on the television and pointed to it.
Harry chuckled when he saw his young self in the Best Song Ever music video along with the rest of his former band mates. āThatās you!ā He said excitedly, clapping with his small hands.
āYeah, buddy. I was in a band before.ā Harry was happy Artemis seemed interested.
āWhatās his name?ā He asked, pointing one of the guys.
āThe blonde one?ā Harry questioned, receiving a nod from the small boy beside him. āThatās Niall.ā
āHeās so cool.ā He commented, kicking his legs back and forth on the couch. āHe does music like you?ā He asked.
āYes, he does, mate.ā
āHeās my favorite.ā He decided.
āOi! I am supposed to be your favorite!ā He pretended to be offended, taking him in his arms and tickling him and making him let out a belly laugh.
āStop! Stop!ā He said in between giggles. āHarry, Iām gonna pee!ā
āSay Iām your favorite.ā
āYouāreā¦ you areā¦ I canāt talk!ā He laughed again and Harry stopped but didnāt let him go. āYouāre my favorite, Harry.ā Ā
Harry smiled, pleased with himself for getting the validation from an almost five year old. āGo wash up, it's almost dinner time." Artemis ran to the bathroom in the hallway as Harry walled towards the kitchen where Y/N was.
"I was a little behind but it's ready now."
"I'd help you, but you banned me from the kitchen the second i got in." The curly-haired man wrapped his hands from behind around Y/N's waist, resting his chin on her shoulder.
"It was because Artemis has been wanting to tell you he saw the band on the TV all afternoon." She giggled, putting the knife down and turning around to face him. "He asked why your hair looked weird."
"Wha'?" He asked, his accent getting noticeably thicker. "What was wrong with me hair?"
"He didn't like the long haired look." She passed a hand through his now much shorter curls.
"And apparently Niall's his favorite, can you believe?" Harry asked in a fake offended tone.
"Artemis likes blondes because he has blonde hair, kid's logic."
"Should i dye mine?" Harry's tone now was playful, grabbing a couple of his curls.
"Please, no."
š š šš š š
A week after dinner, Harry was scrolling down his phone desperately, trying to find the perfect gift for Artemis.
He had invited Harry to his birthday party, and although he was nervous to meet the rest of Y/N's relatives, he was more excited to spend this day with his girlfriend and her son. It would be the first time he was there to celebrate Artemis' birthday, so he wanted it to be perfect.
And a perfect day required the perfect gift.
He just didn't know what to buy. "Doesn't he like Legos? Buy him a set." Mitch said, trying to help. They were currently in a break from a writing session and almost everyone was out to get food.
"There isn't a set he doesn't have." Harry groaned, running out of options.
"What else does he like?"
"Books, robots, music..." He paused, suddenly getting an idea. "He likes music!"
"Buy him an instrument or something." Harry rolled his eyes, letting out a he's five to Mitch. "So?! Better start them young."
"Perhaps. But for now i think i have the perfect idea." Mitch looked confused, but Harryās smile only grew bigger.
He wrapped up the session early and called a friend to see if they could catch up while having some drinks. His right leg shocked in anticipation, looking around trying to find that one familiar face he hasnāt seen in a while.
āStyles!ā Harry smiled at that unmistakably Irish accent. āItās been so long!ā The pair hugged each other.
āFar too long. How have you been?ā They took a seat on the table Harry was previously sitting on.
āPretty great actually, tour ended a little while ago but stills feels very fresh.ā He sighed. āWhat about you? Heard youāre dating someone.ā Niall sent him a smirk, wiggling his eyebrows playfully.
Harry breathed a laugh, touching the bridge of his nose. āI am, met her at the beginning of the year. Her name is Y/N.ā
āLook at you, youāre blushing!ā
āStop it!ā Harry giggle, followed by Niall. āShe has a kid, heās great. Theyāre great.ā
āIām happy for you, H.ā The blonde man gave him a genuine smile. āIs it serious?ā
āPretty much. So Artemis, Y/Nās son, is turning five next Saturday and Iāve been trying to get him the perfect gift.ā
āAny luck so far?ā
āNot really.ā He shook his head. āThatās why I wanted to talk to you.ā
āHow can I help?ā He readjusted himself on his seat.
āWell, I wanted to ask you a favor.ā He paused. āThe other day he found the band and said, for some reason, you were his favorite.ā
āOoh, and that how made you feel?ā Niall teased him, knowing he didnāt like to be second in anything, especially talking about his girlfriendās son.
āDelightful, next question.ā He rolled his eyes playfully and Niall let out a big laugh.
āSo want do you want me to do then?ā
āAre you free next Saturday?ā
š š šš š š
Niall's appearance was a surprise, even for Y/N. He'd arrive later than Harry, just in time to sing happy birthday to Artemis. In the meantime Harry had to make sure everything else was perfect.
He was in charge to pick the cake up from the shop before heading to Y/N's mums' house. He already knew Ally and Ella, and they seemed to really like him so he felt a little less nervous.
Y/N told him a bunch of her friends were gonna be there, including Adam and his family so that was also nice. Harry wasn't very familiar with all of her friends but from what she always tells him, they're good people who care for her and Artemis.
Harry didn't have a key or anything so he knocked the door with one hand while holding the cake with the other. Ella opened the door, grinning at him right away. "Harry! It's so good to see you, love."
"Likewise, Ella." The woman pinched Harry's cheeks before letting him in. "Where should I put this?"
"In the kitchen! There's kids running around and we don't want them to drop the cake."
He did what she said and walked towards the kitchen, finding Ally decorating some cupcakes. "What do you think?" She took one out of the plate and showed it to him.
"Looks great. You've been practicing with the fondant." The cupcakes had a little whale on top of them, made with blue fondant.
"I made turtles, whales, crabs... Oh! Look at this little octopus!" Ally was so excited every single decoration turned out perfect, as her designated was getting the pastries done. "Y/N's changing Artemis's clothes in the guest room if you want to go upstairs with them."
He nodded, heading out of the kitchen and taking a quick look to the backyard. There were some people sitting on tables and a couple of children running around, but no one he knew so he listened to Ally and went up to look for his loves.
He knocked the door and heard Y/N say 'come in!' so that's what he did. "Harry!" Artemis exclaimed, trying to run towards him but Y/N stopped him.
"Stay still, baby. I'm trying to tie your shoes." She was knelt down in front of him, putting his shoes on. āHi, honey.ā She looked up at Harry as he bent down to give her a little peck on her lips.
āHowās the birthday boy?ā Harry sat next to him on the bed and wrapped his arms around him gently.
āDid you see everyone, Harry? Theyāre here for me!ā He said excitedly. He might be say, but he sure as hell likes the attention of his loved ones.
Harry chuckled, messing up his hair a little. āHappy birthday, mate. Couldnāt wait until it was time to open the rest of the presents, so hereās mine.ā He handed him a small box wrapped nicely with a bow on the top.
Artemis took it excitedly and was about to tear the wrapping paper apart but Y/N took his hand gently. āWhat do we say to Harry, darling?ā
āThank you, Harry!ā Artemis threw himself at the older man. āCan I open it?ā
āOf course, itās yours.ā Artemis offered him a toothy smile, opening the box. Inside there was a package of professional colors, there was one in every shade. āI know how much you like your color books, and these are the best colors ever.ā
āWow, thank you, Harry. I love them.ā The small boy hugged him one more time. āLook, mummy!ā
āI see, theyāre so pretty.ā
Artemis hugged Harry once more before hopping off the bed. āCan I go with nana Ally now?ā
āYes, but leave your gift here, okay?ā He nodded before handing his mum the box and running out of the room and off to find his nana. āDid you seriously buy professional colors to a five year old?ā She asked with a smile, shaking her head in disbelief.
āWhat? He loves to paint.ā
āThank you.ā Y/N said, kissing Harryās cheek. āIt was very sweet of you.ā
Harry gave her a dimpled smile. āYou look stunning, love.ā Y/N was wearing a long, white summer dress with little sunflowers on it, paired with some heels.
āSo do you.ā She gave him another kiss. āLetās go, Iāll introduce you to everyone.ā
Going around greeting everyone, Harry had a hold on his phone all the time making sure Niall had the right address to get there in time. Y/Nās mums made a perfect job decorating the backyard, there were balloons everywhere and the tables had different marine animals on the center.
Artemis loved the ocean a lot, considering he lived in London and there wasnāt many beaches to go, he liked watching pictures and documentaries of it. So Y/N thought that instead of taking him to the ocean, she brought the ocean to him.
āHarry, sweetie, would you take the cake out of the fridge and bring it to the table?ā
He nodded and went inside again. At the same time he was crossing the door, someone rang the doorbell so Harry went straight to open it, eager for Niall to arrive. āDidnāt want to show up empty handed so I bought the lad a little something. Itās a train set.ā Niall said as soon as Harry opened the door.
āIām glad you made it, mate.ā They hugged and Harry closed the door behind them. āWeāre about to cut the cake, heāll be so happy to meet you.ā
Harry was so excited for this surprise, ever since Artemis ādiscoveredā his band, heās been obsessed with Niall so the curly-haired man couldnāt wait to see the look in Artemisā face when he sees the blonde man walking into his party. He grabbed the cake before leading Niall outside where everyone was.
Y/N was the first one to notice the new man walking in, and her eyes grew wider when she recognized him. She walked towards them with a confused smile on her face. āHarry?ā
āYou must be Y/N.ā The Irish man said with a grin. āHope itās okay that Iām here.ā
āUh, yeah. Itās great. Nice to meet you.ā She offered him her hand for him to shake.
āI brought Niall to surprise Artemis.ā Harry said proudly.
āOh my, heās going to be so happy, let me bring him over here.ā Y/N went off to find her son. Sheād never expect Harry to actually bring Niall for Artemis but it was a very sweet, thoughtful thing. āHoney, come here. Thereās someone who wants to meet you.ā
The five year old stopped running and walked towards his mum to take her hand and let her lead him to where Niall and Harry were. When he spotted Niall, he got all shy and hid behind her legs, like he always did when he got nervous.
Niall noticed it and crunched down to his eye level. āHi, bud. A little bird told me you liked my music.ā Artemis looked at him with big doe eyes, curious to know what was in the box Niall was holding. āHappy birthday, mate.ā He handed him the gift and Artemis shyly took it from him.
āThank you, sir.ā
āOh my god, heās adorable.ā Niall said, looking up to Y/N and Harry. āCall me Niall, okay? Itās nice to meet you, buddy.ā
Artemis finally smiled at him, letting go of the hold he had on his mumās dress. He came closer to Niall and started talking, Y/N and Harry looked at each other as she took one of his hands in hers to intertwine their fingers.
It was time to cute the cake and Artemis was stood on a chair behind it with Y/N by his side and everyone around him. She motioned Harry to come stand with them and he gladly did so. They sang happy birthday to Artemis and the boy had a big, toothy smile on his face the whole time.
Eventually the guests started to leave, but Artemis didnāt let Niall go before giving him a big, tight hug before making him promise theyād see each other again. Just before all the guests left, Artemis fell asleep and Harry had to take him upstairs to the room Y/Nās mums had for him. When he came down again, everyone was gone and his girlfriend was just finishing picking up some things outside so he went out to help her.
āDid you see how happy he was the whole day?ā She said.
āYeah, he enjoyed it.ā
āIt was really thoughtful of you to bring Niall, you know?ā Y/N walked towards him and wrapped her arms around his waist. āHe was very excited for it.ā
āIt was my pleasure, love to see him smile.ā
āThank you.ā She told him, cupping his face with her hands.
āFor what?ā
āToday was good, but you definitely made it better. So thank you.ā
Harry smiled happily before leaning down to capture her lips on a sweet kiss, making her smile against his lips. It was good to finally feel he belonged somewhere, and slowly started to feel they were becoming his own family. Heād never deny the way his heart skipped a beat every time Artemis laughed, or when Y/N smiled. Harry found himself wanting to be forever there for the two of them, for every single birthday, anniversary, everything.
He was in love not only with Y/N but with Artemis too, and he knew that feeling was never gonna go away.
āāāāāāāāāāāā
taglist!!
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SH Day 12- ANBU Black Ops
@sasuhinamonth
ććć Part 2 (taeru=to endure)
Part 1
Rated M, Ninja Universe that underwent some changes (youāll see that I use major events in the canon world but there is a lot of history thatās altered), OOC (major OOC for Hinata especially)
Warning: self-harm, mental health, sexual harassment, trauma
Hello, dears, I play quite a bit with chronology in this chapter, I hope it's all easy to understand. I made moth things be during summer so around the time of the girl SH month which is why in all the cases you'll see Sasuke is 1year older than Hina, since his bday is in July and hers in December. I hope you enjoy, ~Love Dia
Sasuke, age 23
I think itās fair for me to say that Iāve been through a lot, not many things shake me anymore and all the things that have made me worried in the past years have had something in common, they were all somehow related to Hinata. I remember when I woke up after the war, I was chained to a hospital bed, placed under a jutsu that blocked my chakra, I was missing a limb and I was on the verge of insanity once more. The only thing that calmed me down was her image. Even without my chakra I searched for hers. She too was in the hospital; I found her signature light purple chakra but it was so faint and small I almost missed it. Seeing her like that made me crazy with worry, once everyone left my room, I broke all the chains and dragged myself to her room despite the pain. I hadnāt thought of her as fragile since our reunion when she was 15. I could barely stand to see her that way, and even if I wanted to stay and watch over her for longer, I could feel Narutoās chakra getting closer, which meant I had to leave. For the following weeks I could only go and see her late at night, for there was always someone in her room, Naruto, her father, her sister, some sort of nurse or medic. I recovered under a month, yet I stayed until she woke up.
I was the only one in the room when her eyes opened, she looked confused and for a moment I was sure she had amnesia and would not remember me, us. But for the briefest moment her eyes rested upon my figure and recognition was there, relief was there, gratitude, affection and many other nuances that I can never seem to read or fully comprehend reflected in her eyes. I took her hand and kissed the back of it, allowing myself a small selfish gesture before leaving the room to inform the medics she woke up. Sakura gave me a strange, questioning look when I told her Hinata had woken up, but I didnāt care about subtlety at that second, I just wanted them to check her for any issues, I wanted her to be physically fine.
She didnāt have many memories of the war when she was first questioned, but they came back in waves and waves. I could tell that the questions overwhelmed her, much like the people that littered around, there were over 10 visitors in her tiny hospital room, from her father to Naruto, Kiba and many others. I just watched the whole situation from outside her window. I noticed her looking around, searching for someone that wasnāt there. No, it wasnāt me, she knew I wouldnāt be there when other people were, I knew exactly who she was searching for, thatās why I wanted to be close by. I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, I knew things would take a turn for the worse soon enough. I saw it, the exact moment the fog raised off of her memories, the moment in which reality hit her, the moment in which the remaining light in her eyes died.
She asked for Neji, Naruto cringed, her father was the one to inform her of his passing. She asked when the funeral was going to be and silence fell onto the room. Sakura tried to slowly explain that the war ended two months ago and all the dead were already long buried. Hinata cried, she cried for her fallen cousin, she cried for missing his funeral, she cried for herself. They all gave her hugs and condolences, they reassured her that none of that was her fault. They all expected her to mourn and soon enough bounce back to the faƧade she always kept around the people in the village. They were unaware of the emotional depth her sadness could reach. I knew their expectations would never be met, I could tell that the headspace she was in was similar to the night I found her on the forest floor, she had the same look in her eyes as when she constantly begged me to let her die. Knowing all of that, I expected her to make certain choices, yet, despite knowing what was to come, I was unable to help, there wasnāt a single moment in which she was alone for a week to come. And when it all happened, I panicked at the notion of her death and responded wrongly to her actions.
I wasnāt watching her when she attempted to kill herself, I was with Tsunade who kept insisting that I accept their fake arm. I was in the midst of refusing once more, when I could feel a commotion in her room, I left without a word and ran there. The image that was in front of me wasnāt surprising but it was just as heart-breaking. Hinataās bed was covered in blood, her left wrist was being treated by Sakura but you could still see the long and slim-cut along her wrist, Naruto was holding her other arm trying to put pressure on her wrist to stop the bleeding. It scared me, the amount of blood on herself and the bed, her light-headedness and indifference indicated that she had been bleeding for a long time. She waited for a moment in which I wasnāt there either, she wanted to escape me too. Had Naruto and Sakura been late they might have found her corpse instead. I left the room to calm myself down, I couldnāt cause a commotion. I tried my best to come up with kind and comforting words to tell her later when I would return to her room, but when I did, the image that greeted me, her arms strapped to the bed, made me lose my composure. I screamed at her, I canāt even recall what I said but I know it was very inappropriate, she laughed, she cried. Trying to comfort her with only one arm was difficult, that was the very first moment when I even considered accepting Tsunadeās offer, but in the end I didnāt. I spent every night that followed with her, after the initial shock I was able to recall the words I meant to give her, I knew they werenāt going to miraculously fix everything but I felt that she needed them nonetheless.
She apologized for considering that path and acting on her thoughts. I undid her chains and pulled her to my lap as she talked. āThe moment my eyes moved past Narutoās shoulders and I saw you in the door frame I regretted my choice, I wished I could undo it if only to never have to see that look on your faceā I placed my face into her hair and just breathed her in. āI think I understand a little better nowā¦what you felt when Itachi died, when you found out the truth. Our situations arenāt the same but I remember howā¦ā she stopped, searching for the perfect word.
āCrazy? Unhinged? Mad?ā I provided, but she frowned and shook her head.
āNo, no, none of thoseā¦how anguished, sorrowful, wretched you were at the time. You come to me in a very agitated state, I was scared and concerned but couldnāt grasp that feeling. Now I doā If Iām honest I donāt remember how felt at the time, I donāt remember many things about that period of my life, all I know is that I wanted to give up, I thought I had made only wrong choices in my life, but I saw her and I remembered that even I could save someone.
After a few more nights she assured me that she was now mentally stable, her sadness was still very much present, but she had not had any self-harming thoughts. The decision to leave the village was very difficult at the time, but Hinata assured me that she enjoyed our routine and wished to continue it. I left but our correspondence was much more frequent than before the war, I would write her every other day and sheād reply as soon as my messages reached her. It took a bit over 3 months for her to resume her work as an ANBU, and a bit over 8 months in total to convince Kakashi to promote her to ANBU Black Ops. Her missions became more difficult and longer, she even had a mission in Amegakure that lasted half a year. When she first sent me the message informing me of the location of her mission it reminded me of our first encounter after I left the village. Our encounter that summer isnāt a memory I think of fondly, I was cruel, I was insane, I abused my knowledge of her trauma. Whenever I remember my actions, I want to go back and rewind the time, I want to apologize to 15-year-old Hinata, she was meek and fragile and I broke a part of her. She was doing her best to survive and to keep going and I was a huge obstacle in her recovery. When my feelings for her started changing I was always self-conscious whether they were genuine or not, wasnāt I using her? Wasnāt I just feeling guilty?
Hinata, age 15
I am nervous as I pack my bag for this mission, it is my first solo mission ever. 6 months after I became a Jonin and Tsunade finally trusts me enough to allow me to go alone in a mission. The destination is Amegakure and the mission is supposed to last for about to 3 weeks. The difficulty level of the mission is only B which Iād be pretty annoyed at, but the distance factor and the solo factor make up for it so, I am equally nervous and excited. When I told Neji about the mission he was concerned but didnāt show it much for my sake. Instead, he congratulated me and we had a small picnic in the outer skirt of the Hyuuga estate as celebration.
Now I am looking through my dresser for appropriate clothes for the rain to pack, I have to look for another set of kunais just in case and prepare myself a couple of bentos to have on hand. Slowly, the closer the night before my departure gets the less anxious I am, excitement seems to be the winning sentiment.
The morning of, I wake up at 4:30 a.m. and am unable to sleep longer. By the time I am fully dressed and ready to go itās only 5:00 a.m. and the sun is barely raising, but I decide that it is light enough outside for me to leave. As always whenever I pass through the forest thereās a chill going through my veins and my enthusiasm is a bit dampened, I actively try and avoid that specific place even if it means it will add to the journey time. On the schedule, Tsunade gave me Iām meant to spend 8 days on the road to the village, approximately 4 or 5 days into the village and 8 more days back.
The mission itself isnāt supposed to be that difficult all I need to do is meet with different people in the village give them the scrolls Tsunade gave me and wait for their replies. All in all, there should be no fighting, Iām mostly a messenger but the large amount of people that need contacting made it impossible for a summon raven to deliver the scrolls. My adrenaline rush of being on my own, experiencing what freedom feels like made me speed up during the journey, I took less stops and didnāt even spend the night in one of the Inns I was supposed to. Thus, not only did I depart earlier than planned but I arrived into the village almost a day and a half ahead of the schedule. Since itās still barely past noon I decide to start the mission a day early and I am able to cover a fifth of the task on the first day.
People usually when talking about Amegakure call it gloomy and depressing, but I enjoy walking around in the rain, the temperature isnāt too high despite it being the middle of a heatwave everywhere else, the smell and sounds of rain also add to its charm. The Inn Iām supposed to stay at for the duration of my mission is on the outside of the village, it is away from the noise of the centre, but not far out enough to say it isnāt part of the village at all. Walking into my room I sit down and finally grasp that I am days away from Konoha, I am alone. The realization makes me emotional; I hadnāt realized how much I needed to be on my own, how good it would feel to put distance between me and everything that Konoha entailed.
Sitting alone in the dark, only with the occasional lightning brightening up my room, I make a decision, I promise myself to only ever come on solo missions. Iāve endured years of discomfort so I deserved to feel this way, if only during missions. I take a shower and go to bed, Iām not as physically tired as I thought I would be after the journey and that worries me. I donāt want the nightmare to come and ruin my mood, but I close my eyes nonetheless.
It feels like barely a second passed when I open my eyes and see the cool light coming from outside. The sun is hidden behind the clouds of rain, but its light still pushes through to an extent. I had no dreams, no nightmares. I rested well and I feel better than I did in many years. I walk barefoot onto the cold wooden floor and I open the window, not caring that the rain is getting both me and the floor wet. I close my eyes and feel immensely liberated, the heavy chains that dragged me down at all times disappeared. Nobody here knows me and I donāt know them, I am but a face in the crowd, this anonymity offers me the independence I never knew before.
I complete the mission in under 3 days. I feel faster, stronger, happier here. It feels like I can do anything and everything. I have about 3 days I can waste in the village, under normal circumstances Iād return immediately to Konoha to get another mission and the cycle would repeat. But I decide to stay here for a while longer, I want to enjoy this feeling to the best of my ability. The day right after completing the mission I simply stay inside and sleep almost the whole day. Iām recharging my batteries which have been on low for 3 years now. I forgot what being well-rested felt like.
The following day I decide to wander around some more. The mission had me walk all over the villageās centre so, I decide to check out its outskirt more. I go and eat delicious food at a small booth owned by an older couple. Due to its relatively small scale Amegakureās buildings are much much higher than those from Konoha so I climb on top of one that I deem to be among the highest and sit there, in the rain just watching the busy streets, looking over all the sky-high buildings and enjoying the feeling of being unrestrained by peopleās gazes and expectations. For the smallest second, I feel someoneās gaze on me but I discard it as being the locals looking at the strange outsider thatās standing in the rain. I refuse to let my mood be dampened, not when I am just as high as this building is.
I return to the Inn and decide to take a shower, tomorrow is going to be my last day here and I feel like time is moving far too fast. Iām rinsing my hair when I get the same feeling as before, like someone is watching me. Before I can dismiss it again, I hear steps behind me, my mind goes blank. Iām suddenly turned around by a powerful hand, before closing my eyes I see a pair of black dead, unfeeling, cold, cruel, scary, scary, scary, scary eyes. I close my eyes and clench my jaw; I can feel tears trailing down my face. Iām hyperventilating, I canāt move, Iām weak, Iām small. I whimper when I feel his hand touching the scar right above my pelvis. The touch transports me back to when Iām 12 and on the ground, my legs no longer support me, the only reason why Iām still standing is because the man is holding my arm in an iron grip. The moment passes and his hand is gone allowing me to fall to my knees and then onto my butt. I have no idea how long I stay there in a trance. When Iām finally able to regain strength in my limbs to feel and make small movements I notice the shower water is freezing cold despite it being set to warm. I turn it off and walk into the room, thereās no trace of the man anymore, he didnāt do anything beyond touching my arm and my scar. Maybe he was simply created by my brain, yea no one was here, how could they be, why would they be.
I can feel myself slipping into hysteria as laughter bubbles up into my throat. I look around the room again searching for proof again and I sigh in relief when I find none. Iām finally calm enough to get dressed but I make the mistake of looking in the mirror. Thereās a handprint on my arm where he gripped me. The print is red and turning a weird purple colour in places and yellow in others. He was here. He was real. I take small breaths in order to calm myself, I am fine, I am here, I canāt even picture the face of the man that was here, I try to force myself to forget the handprint, it was just a dream, another nightmare.
I pack my things and leave that very night despite being tired physically, mentally and emotionally. I donāt want to return to Konoha, and I canāt stay here, I donāt know where to go. The freedom I felt before gave me an amazing sense of accomplishment, but now it is a source of unease. I feel lost and like I do not belong anywhere. I feel insignificant. I feel lonely. I close my eyes and just sit on the floor outside of the village, waiting for something or someone to come get me. But nothing happens and the weather is turning cold despite the summer so I pick myself up and start walking wherever the road will take me.
I donāt remember the journey back home, I canāt even tell in how many days I completed it, I didnāt stop at all, I just ran. I ran from the man, the past, I ran from my weak self. I thought myself to be strong now that I am a Jonin, but I froze and was unable to do anything all the same. I need to be more than I am, I need to be stronger, braver, untouchable, more perceptive.
I hate myself for hesitating to enter the Konoha, I hate myself for hesitating to take on a new mission when Tsunade offers it. I hate myself when I have to walk through the halls of the Hyuuga compound, I hate myself when I hide from Neji. I hate myself when I walk into my room and burst into tears. I hate myself for getting my hope that high in Ame only to have them all crash and burn. I hate that I feel more broken today than I did 3 weeks ago.
Sasuke, age 16
Iāve been in a weird mood since a week ago when I saw Hyuuga in the Village Hidden in Rain. I hadnāt heard or seen anything related to Konoha since I left during the Chunnin exam. She was my first contact with it. Hinata Hyuuga, I remember her name clearly, she holds a special meaning to me, she is a life I saved. I saved her back before I was caught up in any business with Orochimaru, when I still thought following Kakashi was the right path to take, back when I was stupid and naĆÆve. I hadnāt thought of her since that moment, but when my eyes fell onto her, I felt proud that she survived, but I also felt the need, the urge to utterly crush her beneath my feet. Her life belongs to me; I saved her so, I have every right to destroy her.
I could tell she was uncomfortable with me there, I felt her flinch as I traced the scar above her pelvis, I heard her whimper when I turned around, and I saw from the corner of my eye, as her legs have in and she fell to the floor. She looked small and pathetic and I felt strong in comparison.
However, now, days later I feelā¦guilt. I feel as if I used something against her that I shouldnāt have. At the time her image was blurry and not something I paid attention to, but I can clearly see it now whenever I close my eyes. He white skin had almost no imperfections besides the three scars, her eyes were shut tight, her face was red and wet, at the time I gloated at the thought that the water droplets were tears, now Iām hoping they were from the shower. Her long dark hair was wet and clinging to her body. She did her best to hide from me with her hands, with her position slightly bent. She was helpless, she didnāt even try to stop me, she didnāt scream or fight back, she froze in place and allowed me to do whatever I wanted. At the time that too made me feel powerful, I deluded myself into thinking that my presence as Sasuke Uchiha made her cower in fear. Now that I am analysing things once more, I realize it was her trauma that rendered her powerless, it was my presence that caused her fear, but she wasnāt scared of me, Sasuke, but rather of me, a male; she didnāt see me as an individual but as the image of the man that hurt her in the past.
Realizing that in her mind I was equal to that disgusting piece of trash makes me livid. I clench my jaw, pick up the first thing I see, a jar of whatever substance from one of Orochimaruās labs and I throw it to the wall. The green liquid escapes its container and slowly eats away at the wall and ground, the sizzling noise and putrid smell donāt even bother me. Iām angry at her, I want to find her and scream in her face that Iām not that man. I wanna shake her until she understands. I am mad at her, at myself. Kabuto comes in and curses, he drags me out and talks under his breath, his presence adds to my anger.
āWhat do you want?ā I ask him, Iām looking down at him. I grew taller these past few weeks, taller than him. I want him to pick a fight, I want a reason to smash his face in. The image of his bloody face as he lays unconscious on the ground would bring me the satisfaction I need. He looks mockingly at me, thatās enough to start a fight.
Less than 20 minutes later the fight is over, heās not unconscious, heās still standing, more precisely, walking away. But he is bleeding and so am I. The fight didnāt help. I still feel angry, but my anger is slowly being overshadowed by guilt.
The sudden urge to find her and apologize overcomes me, but I dismiss it. Sheās long goneā¦I checked. The two of us wonāt meet anytime soon and even if we do, Iāll never apologize, not to her, not to someone thatā¦weakā¦
Hinata age 22
After sleeping in until 11 after all, I wake up to Sasukeās face next to mine, I feel at ease, I feel happy. I cup his face and place a kiss over his closed eyelids. I feel his change in breath when he wakes up but his eyes remain closed. His arm comes around my waist and pulls me closer to him, slowly he opens his eyes and offers me a lazy smirk. For a while I forget that weāre in Konoha, I forget everything about people trying to control me. All my worries just disappear with his presence.
āWhat are you thinking about?ā he asks and brushes my bangs out of my eyes. āYouā I want to say, but I decide to be selfish instead. I sit up and he does too, I move towards him and place myself on his lap, we are chest to chest, face-to-face. āI am unsure how long theyāll make me stay here. This... sensei jobā¦they could stretch it for months, who knows.ā I hate that thatās true, I hate that theyāre trying to cage me into the village. āitās difficult being here for an indefinite period of time, especially since I donāt have out missions to look forward to. Soā¦ā I stop talking, rethinking what Iām about to ask, wondering if itās worth it, but he looks at me with no judgement, heās waiting patiently. āSoā¦I was thinking. Maybe being here in Konoha would be betterā¦if you were here as wellā Part of me initially regrets the words and wants to take them back.
āYou want me to stay here until you can go back to your normal missionsā he didnāt formulate it as a question so I didnāt reply, mostly because I didnāt trust myself not to say no, to act like it was a joke, so I stay silent. āOk, I willā his hand is on my wrist and itās slowly moving up under my tank top. āYou should already know that anything you ask of me, Iāll do Hinataā I do know that, but this was something that I had been afraid to ask for a while. Would staying in Konoha be better with him here? It must be.
We talk some more about his stay in Konoha and then proceed to eat a late breakfast. āI passed by the cottage outside of Amegakure on my way to Konohaā that cottage will forever represent my safe space, all my memories in it are out-of-this-world happy. The cottage itself is pretty much outside every territory of every village, it belongs to nobody, yet thatās the place I feel I belong in. I stayed there for my thirst or fourth mission as an ANBU, as usual Sasuke met up with me and we live together there for months. Sasuke and I worked together for most of my missions, we completed them faster than it was estimated they would take and we spent the remaining of the time just being together outside of all the rules of everyone. That was the place in which after much deliberation and inner-fights I decided to put my trust in him. By then we had already expressed our feelings verbally and with actions such as kisses and hugs, but I wanted to move past that because I craved that closeness with someone, I wanted a stronger bond between us, but also out of spite, I wanted to prove that I was able to enjoy sex. I wanted to prove that what had happened no longer affected me. Out first time was a bit awkward, we were both virgins, Sasuke was overly conscious of making me feel comfortable and I just wanted it to be done with so our desired speed didnāt match, but it happened and it was fine. The second and third time around it was much better and now we reached a point in which intimacy with him doesnāt scare me in the least, I love it and it makes me feel amazing. I am aware that Iām not fully over the incident, the close proximity of strange men that I donāt know still bothers me at times, however, I am much stronger and able to protect myself, I am just...wary.
I end my train of thoughts by going back to the memory of our first time and it makes me giggle a little. Sasuke asks me with his eyes what Iām laughing about and my reply is only a smirk, I see the wheels spinning in his brain and the connections being made. I love that after so many years weāre able to just understand each other in this manner. He gets up from his chair and walks around the table to place his hand on the nape of my neck. āI can show you how much Iāve improved since thanā he whispers and bends down to kiss me. I smile against his lips and loop my arms around his neck allowing him to pick me up.
I must have fallen asleep again because I am woken up this time by Naruto loudly knocking on my door. He left me alone yesterday because Sasuke was around but I guess even his long-lost best friend canāt keep his attention off of me for more than 24 hours. I look next to me and my heart hurts because Sasuke isnāt there. I tell myself itās because he felt Naruto so he left, but I still donāt like that.
Naruto keep knocking on the door and Iām sure heās about to tear it down if I donāt open it soon so I walk to it in my pjs with my hair a mess. When I open the door, he stops in his tracks. āOhā¦ā his eyes linger onto the scar on my shoulder, he has an obsession with it Iāve noticed. Does he believe thatās my biggest scarā¦if only he knew. āI didnāt know you were sleeping, Iām sorryā
āAfter yesterdayās mission the kids have the day off so I wanted to restā I donāt assure him that it is ok even though I know thatās the polite thing to do. I am bitter and annoyed that Sasuke isnāt there. For a split moment when I woke up, I thought I had imagined his presence.
āI just wanted to bring these to you.ā He says and presents me with a pile of papers. āI know you were given them before when Kakashi assigned you as their senseiā hah, like it was Kakashiās idea. Hokage-sama wouldnāt have pushed me into being a sensei from a Black Ops and we all know that. I know Naruto pulled all of the strings to get me here, however, Kakashi-san is also to blame for allowing all of this to happen ābut I think you should really read them well, you said you have a free day today. I can stay here with you and read them togetherā
I look at him and his easy-going smile. On normal days Iād try and be nice, but all I want to do today is spend my time in peace. āI heard Uchiha-san is back. Are you sure you want to spend the day with me reading about some kids rather than catch up with him?ā I feel sorry for guiding Naruto towards Sasuke, but I know Sasuke and if heās one thing, heās good at not being found.
Upon hearing Sasukeās name Narutoās smile brightened to the extent that it actually hurt my eyes. āI already saw and talked to him todayā He left before Naruto came here, was it before we ate? After? When did they meet? āWe talked and agreed to go on a mission together this weekā Heās leaving after I asked him to stay āWe went to Kakashi and already got all the info, so Iāll spend a lot of time together with him and find out all about what heās been up to in these years and I ---ā Naruto keeps talking but I feel suffocated.
#sasuhina#sasuhina month#sasuhina month 2021#sa survivor#sasuhinamonth2021#shmonth#shmonth2021#shino#hinata#susake uchiha#hinata hyuuga#uchiha#hyuuga#sasuhina facfic#fanfic#fanfiction#dia story#diawrites
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Take My Hand, Take My Whole Life Too
Pairings/Characters: America/Romano. Background Gerita, and Seborga and Prussia are there too. Very brief appearances from Denmark and Lithuania in the video, as well as a ton of other characters who donāt get lines.
Rating: Teen, but only for cursing. Very fluffy, and no warnings to speak of.
Word Count: 2518
Summary: America sends Romano a special video for his birthday. He isnāt Elvis Presley, but itās the best rendition of the song Romanoās ever heard.
A/N: I wanted to post something fluffy for Romanoās birthday. This will be up on AO3 soon.
It had been a nice, quiet birthday for Romano so far. Feliās macho potato had dropped by to spend the day with him, and Prussia had tagged along too. Savino was glad Gilbert and Marcello were here, because otherwise he wouldāve been stuck third-wheeling the sappiest couple in the world on his own birthday. Spain and Belgium had said they would arrive in a couple hours, which Romano was looking forward to as well. Most of the people who had sent his little brother a happy birthday message had remembered to send one to him too. America had sent them both silly e-cards, and the gifts heād sent had arrived a week early and would be unwrapped along with all the others after they frosted the cake.
Romano was not lonely, especially not for someone who wouldāve had to fly across a whole ocean to see him. He only threw a spatula at Germanyās head when he leaned in to kiss Feli right after he put the cake in the oven because the sight of the potato bastard kissing his little brother grossed him out to no end.
Feliciano pouted at him. āFratello, that wasnāt very nice of you.ā
āI had to stop you two before I lost my appetite. I want to actually be able to eat a slice of cake later!ā
Germany muttered something under his breath, and Seborga giggled while Prussia ruffled his hair. āRelax, Savi. Itās your birthday.ā
Romano shoved Gilbertās hand away. āIām relaxing just fine, damn it.ā He walked over to the counter to check his phone, which had received a few new messages since he and Feli had started making their joint birthday cake.
As he was reading a message from New Zealand (who seemed to be confused by the time difference and hoped their message had arrived on time), a new text popped up on his phone. From America.
āHuh, thatās weird.ā
āWhatās weird?ā Marcello asked.
āAmerica sent me a link to a Youtube video.ā Alfred liked to upload a lot of strange things on Youtube, including cooking videos with his twin, recordings of him prank calling England, and the occasional stunt that wouldāve turned Savinoās hair gray if heād aged like a human. Seriously, what the fuck had possessed him to surf down a staircase on a fucking ironing board?
The message before the link was cryptic as hell. Happy bday. Hereās an extra present for you. š Hope you enjoy.š¶ Knowing America, Romano wouldnāt have been too surprised if heād opened up the link and seen that one Rick Astley song the idiota still thought was funny to send to people. But Feli immediately got excited about it.
āOh, he finally sent you the video! I thought heād do that a month ago!ā
Prussia smirked as Feli rushed over to them. āNah, Al had always planned to upload it today.ā
Germany came over with a subtle hint of a smile on his face, like he knew what all this was about too. At least Marcello still looked baffled as he leaned over to get a look at Savinoās phone.
āWhat the fuck are you assholes up to?ā Savino didnāt like this feeling. He didnāt like that everyone except his baby brother had been plotting something behind his back.
āIt isnāt bad, Romano,ā Germany promised. āJust open the link and youāll see.ā
Romano didnāt trust Germany further than he could throw him, and the guy was way too heavy for him to even lift. But if Germany thought it was okay, it probably wasnāt a video involving the kinds of ridiculous shenanigans America liked to film, and it certainly was nowhere near as heart-attack inducing as some of the videos heād seen Fredo post (especially if Prussia or Denmark were egging him on). Savino squinted at Ludwig suspiciously before he clicked on the link.
It wasnāt Rick Astley. The video started with a black screen. āNo, Gil, youāre supposed to press the red button!ā The voice sounded like Denmark.
āMagnus, I pressed the red button!ā That was Prussia.
āGuys, maybe we could use my iPhone instead?ā America asked. His voice sounded uncharacteristically strained and nervous. āThe quality wonāt be as good, but at this point Vinnyās probably given up anyway.ā
Suddenly, the image of a white dress shirt with a navy tie (and an inexplicable ukulele) appeared on the screen. The camera zoomed out a little, and he could see Alfred smiling at him in a crowded bar with many nations Romano knew well, and many who were only acquaintances. Denmark rushed past him, but Romano could scarcely take his eyes off America. He was wearing the same outfit heād seen him in on the day of the last world meeting heād attended a couple months ago in Berlin, and he was cradling a ukulele in his arms. His warm smile, as always, made Romanoās heart skip a beat. But there was a hint of anxiety in his crystal blue eyes, and that made Romano wish he was there to talk to America and help him with whatever seemed to be bothering him.
āHey, Vinny! Right now itās still January, but by the time I upload this video, it will be your birthday, so happy birthday, dude! I hope youāre having a good day with your brothers.ā He chuckled. āYou guys will probably need a huge cake if youāre gonna blow out all your birthday candles.ā
Romano rolled his eyes. āThatās what numbered candles are for, idiota,ā he murmured.
āAnyway, I know Iām not the best singer in the worldāā Prussia snickered from behind the camera and America glared at him sharply before relaxing back into the smile heād had on his face before. āBut Iāve been practicing this song a lot, so hopefully youāll like it.ā
Romano wondered which song it was. If it was the Italian version of āHappy Birthday,ā America wouldnāt need a ukulele, and this video would not be three and a half minutes in length.
America started strumming the ukulele, and it wasnāt the āHappy Birthdayā song. Savino vaguely recognized the melody, and apparently Feliciano knew what the song was, because he was bouncing next to him and muffling squeals behind his hand. Savino was tempted to smack him, but that would involve looking away from his phone.
Then, America started to sing in a shaky but surprisingly clear voice, staring straight at the camera. āWise men say, only fools rush inā¦ā
Marcello gasped. āHe didnāt!ā
āOh, he totally did,ā Prussia replied smugly.
Savino was too emotional to talk. He teared up as Alfred continued with the next line. āBut I canāt help falling in love with you.ā Fredoās voice was full of sincerity, like he actually meant it, like he actually loved him. For so long, Romano had assumed his feelings for America were completely one-sided, that he would have to ignore them as much as possible, vainly hope they might disappear, and move on with his life as best he could. But clearly, he had been wrong, and the proof was that America was serenading him with a love song. On his birthday.
America started walking backwards with his ukulele, and Prussiaās camera followed him. At the end of the first verse, heād reached a booth with Spain, Portugal, Belgium, the Netherlands and Luxembourg. They all held up signs wishing him a happy birthday in various languages as they sang the last line together. Spain waved and Belgium winked at the camera, and America grinned as he kept walking through the bar.
He briefly stopped by other groups of people to allow them to hold up signs wishing Romano a happy birthday as he sang. Russia, his sisters, and Canada. Lithuania, Estonia, Latvia and Poland. Hungary, Austria, Germany, Switzerland, and Liechtenstein. China, Japan, Taiwan, Vietnam, and South Korea. France, Monaco, all the UK countries, and Ireland. Australia, New Zealand, Seychelles, and Kenya. Greece, Turkey, and Egypt. All the Nordics too. It was the sweetest, most romantic thing anyone had ever done for Romano. America must have gone to so much effort to orchestrate something like this, to gather so many countries together in one bar in Berlin and convince them to go along with his plan. Savino smiled as he kept watching the video. Maybe Alfred wasnāt as good a singer as Elvis Presley or any of the many people who had covered this song, but his performance was heartfelt, and Savino loved every second of it.
Near the end, all of the countries sang the line āFor I canāt help falling in love with youā together and held up their happy birthday signs. The bartender and some confused humans sang along with them. Savino laughed as Alfred chuckled sheepishly in the video, cheeks turning pink because this was an unusually public spectacle, even for him.
Alfred repeated the final chorus and sang with just him and the ukulele, as he had begun the song. āTake my hand, take my whole life too.ā His eyes were shining with tears, and not the happy kind Savino had been shedding since the second line of the song. āFor I canāt help falling in love with you.ā He repeated the final line then took a deep breath.
āSo, yeah. That uhhā¦ wasnāt just a song.ā America glanced off to the side. āIāve kinda been hopelessly in love with you for a while.ā
āAbout 90 years, give or take!ā a tipsy voice shouted from off camera. It sounded just like Lithuania, the few times heād had a little too much to drink at a speakeasy back when he, America, and Romano all lived together. Romano remembered those days fondly.
America hunched his shoulders with a pained look on his face. āYeah. What Tolys said. You mean a lot to me, Vinny, both as a friend and possibly more, if you want that. If you just wanna stay friends, thatās cool. I hope you liked the song. Happy birthday.ā
The screen abruptly cut to black, and the video ended. Savino wiped his eyes and looked up at Feliciano. āThis isā¦ this is why we had to fly back right away, isnāt it? Our boss didnāt call you.ā
Feli shook his head. āI lied. America asked me to lie so he could surprise you with that video.ā
āI canāt believe he did that for me.ā Part of Savino felt like he didnāt deserve it, but a much bigger part of him was too selfish to care about what he did or didnāt deserve. He just wanted to be happy. āI wish he was here,ā Romano confessed quietly. āI wish I could tell him I feel the same way.ā And he wanted to kiss away every tear that idiota had ever cried over him, which was long overdue.
Savino ignored his little brothers cooing over what he had just said and tried not to bristle at the fact that even Germany seemed to think it was adorable. Prussia, weirdly enough, was too busy texting on his phone to join in on the overbearing fawning.
Gilbert chuckled at something on his phone. āAlfredās a lot closer than you think. He decided to skip the Saint Paddyās Day parade this year.ā He grinned up at Romano, who instantly got the message. Alfred wasnāt celebrating with his Irish-American citizens. He was here in Italy, and it wouldnāt take much effort for Romano to find him.
He sprinted to his front door and flung it open. Alfred, who had been standing with his back to the front door, turned around to face him. āVinny, Iā¦ā
Savino was too impatient to let him get another word out. He tugged on the collar of his emerald green t-shirt and sealed their mouths together. Alfred made a muffled sound of surprise and started kissing him a couple seconds later. He wrapped an arm around his waist, and Savino could feel that he was holding something wrapped in cellophane in his hand. He didnāt give a fuck what it was. He didnāt give a fuck about anything except the fact that Alfred was grinning against his mouth as he reluctantly pulled away for air.
Alfredās face was flushed, and he had to reach up to fix his glasses. āWow. This t-shirt never worked before.ā
Savino glanced down at the shirt, which read āKiss Me, Iām Irish!ā (of course it did) and snorted. āI didnāt kiss you because of a fucking t-shirt logo. I kissed you because I watched that birthday video you sent me, which was the most adorable goddamn thing Iāve ever seen in my life.ā
āSo you liked the song, huh?ā
āI loved the song. And I love you too, Fredo.ā
He heard sniffling, and it couldnāt have been Alfred, who was beaming at him like every prayer heād ever uttered had been answered just by Savino saying those words to him. And the sniffling noise was coming from behind him. At least one person had followed Romano to the front door, but Romano had been too focused on America to notice.
Romano tensed up as America laughed and put an arm around his shoulder. āGermany, are you crying, dude?ā
āIā¦ Iām verklempt. That was a beautiful moment.ā Savino glanced over and saw that Germany wasnāt the only one. Veneziano, Seborga, and Prussia were all standing in the entryway, and they all looked misty-eyed.
Romano groaned and turned to bury his face in Americaās ridiculous t-shirt. āSeriously, did you come out here to fucking spy on us?! What the hell is wrong with you?!ā America squeezed his arm around him in a silent gesture of support. He could probably tell how embarrassed Romano was.
āWell, you were the one who decided to run out the front door suddenly,ā Marcello said teasingly. āYou canāt blame us for wanting to see what was going on.ā
Veneziano piled on. āItās nice of you to visit us on our birthday, America. You can come inside if you want, or you can stay out here and kiss Savi some more.ā
Romano growled and turned to shoot vicious glares at both of his brothers, but America didnāt seem bothered at all. āAs tempting as it sounds to stand here and kiss Vinny all day, I think Iāll come inside.ā He dropped his arm from around Savinoās shoulders and presented him with the floral bouquet he somehow hadnāt noticed earlier in his mad dash to the door. āThese are for you.ā
āGrazie.ā Savino smiled as he bent his head to sniff the bouquet of red roses mixed with white lilies. The symbolism wasnāt lost on him.
āAnything for you,ā America whispered, too quietly for the others to hear. He pressed a kiss to Savinoās cheek, grabbed his wheeled suitcase, and dangled out his free hand as they headed into the house behind the others.
Romano grabbed Americaās hand and laced their fingers together. This was the best birthday heād ever had, and it was due in no small part to the fact America was holding his hand right now and smiling like he was the one who had received everything he ever wanted.
#hetalia#romerica#hws romano#hws south italy#hws america#hws veneziano#hws north italy#hws seborga#hws germany#hws prussia#italy bros#italy brothers#aph romano#aph south italy#aph america#aph veneziano#aphĀ north italy#aph seborga#aph germany#aph prussia#hetalia fanfic#hetalia fanfiction#hws fanfic#hws fanfiction#aph fanfic#aph fanfiction#my writing#original post
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aoinene week ; day 4 & 6 prompt - pride + future
-Ā ādonāt you ever forget my worthless pride.ā
warnings : like one mention of fire but not an actual fire
notes : oh god yeah im super late but hereās pining lesbian aoi as compensation. the titleās a birthday present for oikawa tooru since itās his bday <3Ā
(and and the setting is like a college au wherein aoi and nene havenāt met yet so um ehe)
Being anxious wasn't out of character for Aoi. However, despite being the perfect and pretty woman she was, it was crystal clear how awkward she looks right now. Although it wasn't her original idea to spend her Saturday on a Pride Event, she still thought going here was a horrible decision.
"Maybe I shouldn't have come..." She mutters under her breath, unease settling in her stomach at the judging glares sheĀ knowsĀ she's getting. Or, maybe everyone's attention wasn't on her this time, though it definitely felt like it. "Hey, Akane, can we go ho- Akane?"Ā
The brown-haired man seemingly disappeared from her side out of nowhere. And, coming from him of all people, was as rare as a blue moon.
'Wait. Does that mean I was talking to myself this entire time?'Ā Grumbling, she tugs at her hair in absolute frustration, cursing at how she even bothered to come.Ā 'Stupid. Stupid Akane.'Ā
The only reason she even came was because ofĀ him. Akane once fell completely and overly in love with her charms but acknowledged how uncomfortable she got when he tried his advances on her and backed off. She truly admired how he stopped flirting with her any chance he got. But, she didĀ notĀ appreciate how perspective he was. Especially at how he examined her blushing reaction when a girl told her she was stunning. Then proceeding to figure out she might be a little more into girls than she had intended. Which, by the way, he realized before she even informed him.Ā
She recalls the feeling of utter astonishment at how he had mentioned it when they were walking back to their homes. After that, she quickly speed-walked forward out of embarrassment with her face in her hands.Ā 'That was the most iconic moment of my life.'Ā He told her the next day, smirking smugly at himself. She resists the urge to pinch his ear until it turned red.
Aoi crosses her arms, looking around to check if Akane was anywhere nearby. Alas, the coffee-colored man's hair (who was,Ā coincidentally, obsessed with coffee) wasn't near her at all.Ā 'Great. Now he's probably wandering around shouting my name and disturbing everyone.'
All of a sudden, her laments seemed to cease at once. It's as if her logical reasoning instantaneously shut down at the sight ofĀ her. The silver-haired woman who walked right past her with bright amber eyes and a golden grin on her lips.Ā 'She... resembles a daikon...'Ā She blushes, gazing at her intently. The daikon, who paused beside the telephone, turned to look at her with curious eyes. Her cheeks echoed of ones engulfed in flames. Her breath hitches the moment they lock eyes.
As nervous as she was, she wasn't one to lose face over a pretty girl. In spite of her soul about to leave her body, she stumbles her way over to her with a sheepish smile.Ā
"Y-You look hot," Aoi hears her stammer out, her remaining bit of sanity disappearing into the wind. "T-That is, That is because you're wearing that coat, yeah! Uh, um, my name is Nene, Nene Yashiro." The girl flushes at the realization of her words, bowing with her fists clenched.
"Aoi Akane." Nene stops bowing when she responds and starts fiddling with the strap of her shoulder bag. "It might've been better if you didn't correct yourself, you know." Aoi winks innocently, acting as if her whole face wasn't pink.Ā
"Would you believe me if I said I had to make up that excuse on the spot?" Nene laughs skittishly, gripping the strap tightly.Ā
"Only if you treat me to cake some time?" Aoi snorts, twirling her hair like she hadn't a care in the world. The exact opposite of what she felt inside. In fact, if you listened closely, you could hear a loud scream coming from all of her veins. Nene nods eagerly, finding her phone from inside her bag.
"Yashiro!"
"Yashiro-san!"
The eager nod swiftly turns into her dropping her phone on the ground with a fumble of her hands as they hear two distinct voices shouting her name.Ā
"I am so sorry!" Nene scrambles to pick up her phone as the two boys stride up to both of them. Aoi observes them in silence. One of the boys wasn't very tall, roughly at height with herself, and had choppy, black hair. The other boy was scrawny with spiky blonde hair that bothered her every single time she even took a glance at it. "Akane-san, these two guys are my friends, ahaha."
"Boyfriends...?" Aoi bites the inside of her cheek, tension overshadowed in her eyes.Ā
"What!? No, no, not at all!" Nene waves her hands profusely. Blondie looks at her in concern, attempting to soothe by sayingĀ 'C-Calm down, Yashiro-san..!'Ā while not looking very tranquil himself. The brunette's eyebrow raised at the adamant refusal, saying how he'sĀ 'as handsome as that donut in that shop from before.'
"This is Kou," She points to the blondie with the shy smile on his face, "He's totally in love with this one guy from the photography class." That comment only made him burst into flames, making the rest of them snicker at his expense.
"And this guy is Amane," She then points to the brunette with a smug grin, who then pulls Aoi closer to him to whisper something in her ear. Nene groans and pushes the stunned girl away from him. "He pushes people's boundaries, as most people do."
The next few minutes strayed with lighthearted nonsense chatter. Aoi takes a look and melts at Nene's laughter now and again. Once the sun starts to glow quite glaringly, and the heat becomes much more unbearable, they start hearing a sound. Particularly a chant ofĀ 'Ao-chan! Ao-chan! Ao-chan!' The mentioned girl feels her stomach drop with dread.
"I have to go before he starts plowing through the crowd." She jeers sadly, the trio not knowing whether what she just said was a joke or not. "... Not a joke, unfortunately."
Before Aoi leaves to calm a wrathful childhood friend of hers, Nene grabs ahold of her wrist hurriedly. Looking back at her pleading face, she swore she could explode into fireworks then and there.Ā
The moment Akane had found her through the countless amount of people in the crowd, he had dash and catch her from tripping over the concrete over how doozy she was. How her rationality ceased to wash over her? He didn't know. But, he had a feeling it was something about the array of numbers written on her arm.
notes : theyre girlfriends, your honor
#aoineneweek2021#aoinene#toilet bound hanako kun#aoi akane#nene yashiro#THIS TOOK THREE DAYS OH MY GOD#take a shot every time i say looks#im so tired omg#and im not late wdym??
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Hakuoki Yuugiroku 3 - Short Episode #8 āThe Troubles of the Head of the Kazama Familyā Eng Translation
This is my first post of the month, so Iāll start by asking you to please support me if you can through my ko-fi, and paypal or patreon which provides access to my hakuoki blog translations and early access to my postings. Also, please let me know if you have any hakuoki drama cds that youād be willing to share that are on my Lookout List since i either do not have audio for those cds or do not have audio that I can share.... and if you are able to remove watermarks from a video, please contact me. Ā
no translation posts next week since my bday is next week and i use that as a break... hopefully iāll finally be able to watch the a certain CxM stage play that i may have downloaded a while ago. tad surprised about how much music from the game i heard while i was skipping through the honpen file to check that it was working...Ā Ā
anyway, enjoy~ also the punctuation in the tl i used doesnāt match that of the game so that will be fixed later.Ā
also im probably going to drop all yuugiroku 3 stuff aside from the short episodes given the amount of editing work i need to do (the translations im relying on seem to be missing some details).
The Troubles of the Kazama Family Head
Translation by KumoriYami
Kazama: Damn it, those Shogunate dogs!
Shiranui: Hey, I've come to play, it's been a while since I've seen you.
Amagiri: You've come, Shiranui, though this may not be a good time.
Shiranui: [Since this is] Not a good time, did something happen?
Kazama: What could possibly have happened?
The number of people who want to separate me from my wife has doubled/There are almost twice as many people trying to separate me from my wife now.
They're not just within the Shinsengumi, there are actually outsiders too!
Shiranui: Oh, so you're complaining that the number of enemies/rivals for love has increased?
Really, come on/forget it, you should give up/give up.
Kazama: Impossible!
Oni should be linked with other oni! And this would be the marriage of two leaders! What is there to hesitate about!
Amagiri: Was she not raised as a human? You asking her to accept the opinions/circumstances of an oni may be impossible.
Shiranui: Hey Amagiri, if you say something that provokes him, you won't be able to say anything
Amagiri: Indeed.
Shiranui: What kind of guys were added.
I know Sakamoto. Who are the others!
Kazama: Nagakura, Sanan, Yamazaki are from the Shinsengumi.
There's another of the Shogunate's dogs, a hanamoto named Iba.
Additionally, there's some useless youngster named Souma.
Then there'sĀ Sakamoto, that frivolous man you know of.
Amagiri:......I feel that your introductions are too malicious/impolite/rude/weren't very polite.
Shiranui: I don't think he's aware of his biases.
Those people are protecting that female oni.
At least they're better than Kazama......
Kazama: What did you say! Shiranui, you need to pay attention to what you say to me.
Do you know who you are talking to?
Shiranui: I only stated my honest opinion.
Kazama: I am strong, rich, I have unlimited prospects/a limitless future, and am also from an oni clan. Why can't I compare with them/How am I unable to match them!
Shiranui: It's a different matter if that female oni wants that or not [might change to interested based on jp mtl].
Amagiri: Not all women pursue power and wealth.
Shiranui: There are many women who would rather avoid men with those things.
Kazama: ! Are you saying that Yukimura and I are not suitable for each other?
Shiranui: In any case, if that's what that female oni decides, I won't intrude.
Amagiri: Myself as well, were I not in this position, I would recommend that she choose another man to live out her life with. Ā
Kazama:......
Shiranui: What's wrong?
Can't we say this? You need to think about everything you've done.
Kazama: How should I change [then].
Shiranui: ļ¼ļ¼
Kazama: How can I make it so that my wife does not look at those shady people, and marry into my family.
Shiranui: Wha!!!
Amagiri: ļ¼ļ¼ļ¼ļ¼ļ¼
Kazama: What's with that astonished expression, is what I said that surprising?
Shiranui: No, although this is for a pure-blooded female oni, I really didn't expect it to this degree.
I didn't think it was possible for him/you to actually say that heād/you would change for someone else.
Amagiri: Did you eat something you shouldn't have? Or do you have a fever?
Kazama: What do you mean?
Are you saying that I am a man who is completely unrepentant [might change to remorseless... or some other synonym] and arrogant?
Shiranui: Mm, no! It would be great if that was true though.
But you've had the same temperament since you were a kid, can you change it?
Amagiri: And not just because / this cannot be because you're being reprimanded, but rather for the sake of the daughter of the Yukimura family!
Kazama: I am a man who does what he says, and I am saying that I will change.
Shiranui: If you're really serious, we'll help you.
But even if Kazama is humble/modest, that female oni might view that as a trap.
Amagiri: That cannot be said!
This however is a good opportunity to correct his daily bad habits.
Shiranui: That's also right, we should take advantage of this opportunity.
Kazama: What are you secretly whispering about?
You still haven't told me what I should correct.
Shiranui: Okay, I got it, do you have the courage to listen?
Kazama: Come then, I will see this to the very end, so don't hold back!
End
#hakuoki#hakuouki#Hakuoki Game Translation#hakuoki yuugiroku 3#Kazama Chikage#Amagiri Kyuuju#Shiranui Kyo
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ew why tf are you dating a scrote
okay this is clearly a troll, but Iāll answer anyway since this seems to be a topic of interest to people lately. I wrote a lot and talked about sexual assault, so go ahead and skip it if thatās not your jam. disclaimer: I donāt have a problem or think thereās anything wrong with people who donāt want to follow me bc of the bf. thatās legitimate! please do what suits you. I think some of my responses have been perceived as snarky in the past but I only try to be snarky when I suspect a troll, I really donāt have a problem with people unfollowing me b/c of the bf or even telling me about it.
I worked with Malcolm for about a year and a half before we go together, but we got together for the first time 5 months after I had a brief but intense love affair with a meth addict that ended in big traumatic ways after he started using heavily again, which eventually cultivated in him raping me (not that it was the only sexual violence I experienced with him but that time was particularly horrific because I was heartbroken and he was high on meth). he was also a man, and the reason I started dating him isnāt so clear to me except that I was looking for a way to live recklessly and self harm. Thereās a longer story there but the details canāt be told concisely and itās no oneās business. In any case, everything that happened with him is not worth recounting, but it was long and complicated and continued even after the rape. To give some context about how bad it was, I also had worked with the meth addict (Iām not using his name on purpose), and part way through our relationship he got a new job. a couple weeks after the rape, he lost that job and got his old job back. yeah, imagine being dumped by a meth addict and the being raped by him and then he starts working with you when you know he is using now. not fun, pretty sad to think about.
I was in a very traumatized state for months. Itās hard to describe what itās like, except you donāt feel like youāre living. You can feel very foreign to your own life. I felt like something inside of me was constantly pressing against me to get out, and if it did it would be me screaming. Like, my skin had become a suit to mask the babbling lunatic underneath. I would have random outbursts where I would wince in pain and people would ask what was up and it was just that the emotional pain was felt so sharply it became physical, but I felt like I couldnāt be honest with people. I did go to therapy, it felt like life and death. right around the time before Malcolm and I together, so a few months into therapy, my therapist gave me permission to feel okay seeking out love, sex, and relationships, because I was feeling very guilty that I might be using someone if I did. In any case, Malcolm showed up to my bday party, and was one of the last to leave, and I just was ready for the next thing after the meth addict bf. Every day I didnāt have sex, the last person I had sex with was him. I wanted to be normal again. I was feeling a little better, less freakish, but still so sad. So I said, okay Malcolm, come home with me and he did. It didnāt seem so bad to take Malcolm home with me because I wasnāt very interested in him long term, so it seemed like low stakes to end up hurting him. Low investment. Yadda yadda.
Malcolm was also convenient, he lived walking distance. he was nice, friendly, easy to hang out with. our emotional intimacy was very low, it was low low low low maintenance dating. Malcolm felt very safe, he was the polar opposite of the other bf. we had a casual, boring, unintimidating fling for a few months that sputtered out. if the other bf was like riding a roller coaster that was condemned, Malcolm was like taking a nap on the bus back home after a long exhausting day at the amusement park. I know, itās not very sexy. But it was nice to feel like a human again, have proof I could be normal, proof I could do unsexy things like watch tv and go to brunch and it didnāt feel like I was a freak for trying after months of feeling like I had a neon sign over my head that saidĀ āidiot adult woman dated meth addict like it wasnāt going to end up fucking her over HA HA.ā I was ready to go out with my new sense of normalcy and have fun with people I might be, er, to be blunt, more interested in.
BUT the most amazing thing was we stayed friends after the break up, which I had never had before. and even though the first few months of dating helped me feel normal again in a way, it turns out being raped by your meth addict ex leaves deep, painful welts. who could guess. Seeking out other relationships from scratch ended up beingĀ exhausting. When do I bring up that Iām not even a year from a meth addict raping me? Date two? I tried with other people, and it wasnāt working. I dropped dating, and focused on friends and work instead. But I missed him some days, and as things around me were starting to feel like they were crumbling again, he was there and around. He came over, smoked weed, taught me MTG, let me make him dinner, took me out to bars, listened to me cry, had gentle sex. Soon we were seeing and talking to each other every day. We spent enough time together that it became clear we were dating again, and this time around it was more enjoyable and more intimate. It felt easier to invest in our relationship the second time around because he already knew the baggage. We started dating and eventually, out of the sake of convenience, moved in together.Ā
But if it makes you feel any better, anon who is probably not reading this, the state of my relationship is not great atm. It feels like weāre very good friends that share a bed. I always had doubts about this relationship from the beginning, I was never really crazy about Malcolm and was tentative about being exclusive. I rationalized the relationship with thoughts like āyou donāt know until you tryā andĀ āmaybe this love is different love, and it doesnāt feel like previous love because I still need to learn more about love.ā I donāt think thatās quite it anymore. But, we live together in an unpredicted pandemic, so I sort of made my bed. Plus, itās hard to decide to break up with someone who isnāt bad just maybe not good enough. Maybe itās my fault? some days I wake up and think,Ā āoh well am I really giving him 100%? if I tried harder maybe it would be better.ā Maybe itāll get better? Whatās life post pandemic and when is it coming, I canāt know. Iāve been depressed, will I get better? Will it change things? I also adore his parents, theyāve been amazing to me, they inspire me. theyāve opened their hearts to me. losing them weighs heavy. I love Malcom very much, heās been a good friend and weāve built a nice little life together that has a lot of parts working. How do you decide what day to hurt someone you love? Idk...I guess I entered this relationship to learn.
The Meth Addict has loomed large in our relationship and casts a long shadow. Iāve talked about it with Malcolm but Iām not sure he fully understands it. almost 3 years since my birthday we hooked up. Thatās a long time. Itās as long as the relationship I had with my first love. I canāt predict the full story Malcolm and I will have, but I can see a potential break up looming closer. I struggle with it every day. Some nights, like tonight, itās seems pretty clear cut. If I think this way now it pretty much proves I want to break up, right? But tomorrow morning heāll make me tea and weāll talk about our weekend plans and Iāll thinkĀ āoh this is so nice, what was I even thinking about last night? Iām getting in my own head.ā So I donāt know! I think about women a lot. I think about how I talk frankly about my bisexuality on tumblr and yet my experiences with men outnumber that with women. I feel like Iām cheating sometimes, like Iāve lead you guys to believe something thatās not real even though Iām not lying. I think about how I never want to cheat on Malcolm but I get crushes and I want to sleep with women and I wonder if I should be a mom and I think about his parents and it gets confusing. I feel guilty about thinking about our convenience because thatās cheating him and cheating me, but sometimes I wake up happy and much happier than Iāve been in 10 years.
So I guess the reason Iām dating a scrote is because Iām complicated and have a bit of a messy life, and I live day to day, and we make micro choices that lead to macro choices and then we make macro choices that lead to micro choices, and I havenāt pulled the trigger on breaking up with him yet. He was part of the healing journey because, well, he was here. In my real life. It turns out the women we follow on tumblr are very very human with lives far more complex that can be summed up in a few posts on tumblr. Maybe ask me in 50 years why I dated Malcolm, Iāll probably have a better idea why.Ā
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