#might make this into a proper fic if I have time/motivation

[xenon-demon]

only one (1) coherent thought in my skull right now and it’s domestic steddie with Steve washing Eddie’s hair after he’s discharged from hospital post-Vecna.

I’m imagining Eddie’s being discharged to Steve’s house, because Steve is but a simple man with a saviour complex (and also a crush on Eddie) so he’s letting Wayne and Eddie stay with him. Partly so they have somewhere to be while the government sorts out some new housing for them, but mostly because Eddie needs support for these first few weeks out of hospital and Wayne is away at work a lot. Having Steve around as well means Eddie won’t end up in a situation where he needs a hand but is stuck home alone for hours.

Eddie’s recovered enough for discharge but still requires a lot of physical therapy, and one of the things he still can’t do is raise his arms above his head. He can’t wash his hair pretty much at all, and while the nurses washed it for him in hospital, they didn’t do it frequently enough for Eddie’s standards. His hair has been driving him insane, as the limp, greasy feeling against his face, neck and scalp makes him want to claw his skin off. When he’s told how long it’s expected to take before his arms have full range of motion again, he makes a joke-that’s-not-really-a-joke about going back to his buzzcut days just to avoid dealing with the feeling.

Steve is horrified at the suggestion, and immediately offers to wash Eddie’s hair for him. He also divulges that part of the reason he styled his hair the way he did in high school was because he played a lot of sports, and couldn’t stand the feeling of sweaty hair against his neck and face. Sure, he genuinely did want his hair to look good, but styling it up so it was out of his face was an added bonus.

Eddie’s hair is driving him so crazy that he says yes, especially once he realises Steve might actually get where he’s coming from.

Cue an emotionally tense shower, where both Steve and Eddie are stripped down to their boxers because they don’t want to this fully clothed but they sure as fuck don’t want to do it naked, either. (Spoiler alert, they’d both actually love to have a naked shower together, they’re just both too nervous to bring that up at this stage!)

But then Eddie slips while in the shower, still unsteady on his feet and learning to adjust to his bad leg, so Steve makes an executive decision to switch over to the bath. After a bit of manoeuvring they find a comfortable position to do this; Eddie sitting in front of Steve in the bath, Steve’s legs stretched out either side of him. Between the physical intimacy of having your hair washed by someone else, and the way they don’t have to look at each other’s faces as they do this, they end up talking. They get a lot more personal than they were able to in hospital or during Spring Break, and it’s such a nice experience that they’ll each happily put up with the sensory hell of waterlogged boxers.

Eventually - after Eddie and Wayne have moved into their new place, but Eddie and Steve are over at each other’s houses often enough that they might as well still be living together - Eddie can move his arms enough to wash his hair on his own. He’s gotten more used to his bad leg and can stand long enough to even shower if he wants to. They go about three weeks with Eddie washing his own hair, both of them desperately missing this little routine they’d built but not wanting to admit it. One day, however, Eddie feels so lonely and so tired from physical therapy that day that he asks Steve to wash his hair for him. Steve accepts in a heartbeat, almost before Eddie’s even had time to say the words.

It feels different that time. The energy between them is charged, everything feeling more intimate somehow. It’s so palpable a difference that after Steve runs the conditioner through Eddie’s hair to let it sit for a few minutes, Eddie turns around in the bath to face Steve. He takes a breath, trying to steel his nerves, and asks: can I kiss you?

Steve doesn’t answer him; he thinks the way he leans in and slots his lips in between Eddie’s is answer enough.

[pomefioredove]

Just read the whole "Yuu gets sold off by Crowley" stories and OMLLL THEYRE SO GOOD XDDD Any chance you could do more on it like if Niege won or if the parents heard about it and also decided to adopt Yuu and Grim?? Maybe the other staff adopting her too or more on Crewel's adoption please???

requests for the crewel ending are in high demand I see...

parts 1 | 2 | 3 | kalim | 'bad' ending | RSA ending

summary: a crewel ending type of post: short fic, mostly speculation characters: crewel ft. other staff additional info: platonic, reader is gender neutral, reader is yuu, definitely pre-book seven, parents being cringe

If Crewel were allowed to beat Crowley to death with one of his designer handbags, he would have.

...Unfortunately, with the adoption paperwork fees (...and a need for more designer handbags), he regrettably still needs this job.

And he'd like to keep an eye on you while you're still here, too.

The animosity between Crowley and the rest of the staff is unspoken, shared through passing glances and dry remarks at meetings, and though the matter is "settled", in Crowley's own words, no one seems keen on letting it go anytime soon.

The students who participated in the bidding war are subject to months worth of extra homework, harder exams, and worse studying hours from Crewel himself. To teach them a little responsibility, he says.

You, at least, are exempt from his radical new lesson plan. You have enough on your plate as it is.

After all, as soon as the legal proceedings are through and your identity as an autonomous human being in Twisted Wonderland is secured, the "fun" begins.

Your uniforms are tailored and rightly fit, you're given a proper meal plan, even Ramshackle is decorated with a few of Crewel's personal touches. A throw rug here and there, a fresh coat of paint, anything to cover up the rotting interior and turning it into something worthy of envy.

"...Given that Grim doesn't start shedding everywhere," Crewel had said. "Ugh, pets."

The rest of the staff are just as helpful, citing your recent experience with the bidding war as reason to take it easier on you for a while (or for the rest of the semester, really). Trein gives you less homework, Sam "accidentally" doesn't ring you up a few items...

It starts to feel more like the entirety of the staff has adopted you.

Not that you mind, of course. This is the closest thing you've had to family since... well, since coming here.

There's just the one thing, though.

"I don't know why you waste your time with those untrained pups. Honestly. The idea of their tacky shoes touching the rugs in here..." Crewel sighs. His eyes turn to you. "You know, I hear Vil Schoenheit has been looking for someone to take to his next shoot..."

Ashton chuffs. "Don't be ridiculous, they need someone who's strong enough to take care of them! Kingscholar is a real star once he gets motivated,"

"Please tell me I didn't just hear that," Crewel massages his temples. "And might I add, I'm their father, not you. I give the blessing. You're more like the unwelcome uncle crashing the family barbeque."

Grim nudges you with his elbow, muttering a quick yikes before darting out of the kitchen. You groan in embarrassment. "Guys..."

"I'm just thinking about what's best for them," Ashton says, puffing out his chest. "They're at an age where they're going to start thinking about dating, and we want them to make good choices."

"Guys,"

"Exactly. Schoenheit is a perfect gentleman, a master in my class, and has the style to back him up. Kingscholar can demonstrate occasional intelligence, but he's still another housecat," he shudders. "The shedding..."

A tired voice from the doorway interrupts their tense back-and-forth, much to your relief.

"Goodness, the two of you, at this again?" Trein scoffs, taking a seat at the table. "This conversation is highly inappropriate. You shouldn't be controlling the poor thing's romantic prospects, if they even have them. When the time comes, the choice will be theirs to make."

Crewel huffs, rolling his eyes and leaning against the table. Ashton kicks his feet. And neither utter another word.

"Good," Trein says, then clears his throat. "Ahem. But that's not to say that we can't offer our guidance. That Vanrouge did quite well on the last History of Magic exam..."

You groan.

[miabebe]

Anything and Always (YJH)

Was it really love if it didn't include just a little madness? What was love if it didn't cross the line? And how was it love if it wasn't regardless of anything and longer than always?

Pairing - Afab!reader x Yoon Jeonghan

Word count - 3.9K (this is a miracle)

Genre - Oof buckle up my friends. This is a halloween special so I tried not hold back - its a psycho-thriller, there's smut and then there's more pyscho-ness, it's a rideee! Warnings under the cut!

A/n - It's the week leading up to Halloween folks! Unfortunately I'm not the biggest fan of clowns and ghosts and vampires etc, but I do love me a good dose of psychos (who I think are scarier btw) so here you gooooo - I may have more psycho plots for other members too but I have tooooo many og projects to work on to indulge in this T.T - I'll decide if I should do more based on the reception hehe so I would love to hear your thoughts and more!

Big big big thanks to @tusswrites and @tomodachiii - you guys were really the hands behind this one ❤️

warnings - death, murder, blood, lots of toxic emotions like jealousy, possessiveness, extreme insensitivity, PDA, sex in a public place but no one sees them? unprotected sex, rough sex, filthy talk, marking, manhandling, mentions of blowjobs and sloppy seconds, mentions of exhibitionism, choking, creampie, fingering, stalking, obsession, disposing bodies mentioned?, honestly this whole fic is just a warning at this point, idk what to say

“.....Police say that this is possibly the most brutal act of violence they have come across in Seoul city in a long time. The forensics department is still trying to identify the body but estimate that the time of death might have been around 6 months ago. The motive of the crime is still unclear and….”  

Ignoring the sound of the tv you glanced at the two figures on the other side of the glass, standing close to each other, snickering away. Your hand tightened around the letter opener, the sharp edge slicing your skin open, blood trickling down your fist. The crimson felt cold but there was a strange fire coursing through your being.

How dare she? How dare she twirl her hair like a schoolgirl and put her hands on him? And what kind of fool did she take you to be? Did she think you couldn’t see the way she was stuck to your boyfriend like a leech or did she want you to see her making a move on your man? If it was the latter then she was most definitely successful – your eyes hadn’t left their huddled figures in the last ten minutes. At least not until red began to leak onto the papers strewn on the table. Groaning slightly, you quickly let the blade go and grabbed a tissue instead.

But you couldn’t let go of what was happening outside.

Pushing your chair back, you reached for your red satin gloves and slipped them on, covering your wound. It stung as the cloth grazed your skin but you knew it would feel better later, when you’ll run your hand through your boyfriend’s soft tresses as he fucks you into oblivion. He always made everything so much better. 

In complete contrast to the professional approach you’ve always advised your employees to maintain, you opened the door of your cabin and walked over to the pair, hugging your boyfriend from behind, wrapping your arms around his waist.

“Han.” You muttered, placing a soft kiss on the side of his neck before glancing at the woman before you. She tried not to look at you, the same way the entire office was averting their eyes, choosing to look down at the floor instead. Afterall, no one wanted to see their boss romancing right in the middle of the workspace. You didn’t care what they thought, at least not anymore. All that mattered to you was what Jeonghan felt, so when he slowly pulled your hands away from him, you were a little hurt.

But in all fairness, Jeonghan was always like this. Always so wary of people around him, always so conscious, always so proper. If you were being honest, even you used to be the same until a few months ago. Until Jeonghan came into your life to be precise.

Before him life was different. Inheriting your father’s company at such a young age meant you had to prove you were worthy, you had to make sure you were taken seriously. That’s why you made it a point to enforce discipline at work – employees always had to be on time, tardiness was looked down upon, improper dressing was not allowed, discussing anything unrelated to work was not permitted and office romance was strictly forbidden. Again, all that was until Jeonghan made his way into your office one fine day, to interview for the position of your secretary.

You still remembered the moment he walked into your room, clutching his file against his chest, looking around with big eyes. Your childhood nanny turned caretaker introduced him, stating he was a smart guy who just finished his MBA and had a lot of potential. Apparently, a few months ago, he was recruited on the street and used to work as a part time model in your company – you couldn’t seem to recollect his face as he went on explaining how he wanted to do a more serious job now. Surely you would have known if the literal man of your dreams worked in the same space as you right? But then again, before your father died and you took over, you used to work in the writing column of this fashion magazine, the photography side of things was never in your radar. Yoon Jeonghan was never in your radar.

Making him your secretary was quite an easy decision – he had the qualifications, he already knew the company in and out and very soon, he knew you just the same too. 

Well, almost. 

He knew you took your coffee with foam art but he didn’t know it was because you liked that concentrated look on his face when he making it. He knew you always wore gloves as a fashion statement, but didn't know it was also to stop yourself from digging your nails into your skin every time you were stressed. He knew your caretaker and how important she was to you, but he didn’t know she was the closest thing you had to a mother, one whose presence you craved since you were a child. He knew inheriting this company had always been your dream but he didn’t know it was you who mixed the sleeping pills in your father’s milk that led to his overdose. 

Albeit you only added enough to make sure he wouldn’t make it to the extremely important meeting the next day. The idea was that you would have gotten the chance to replace him as CEO temporarily and show the board your talent, but apparently your father was weak enough to die from that miniscule amount, allowing you to permanently take over his role. But this wasn’t your fault, was it? So there was nothing for Jeonghan to know about it. 

Though there were a few things that he had discovered over time that a part of you wished he hadn’t - your anger, your impulsiveness, your stubbornness, your possessiveness…. He didn't know how bad it could get, but Jeonghan knew enough. That’s why the first thing he did when he pulled away from your grip was lead you to the private washroom in your cabin and fuck you mindless, thrusting into you hard and fast, letting your mark his neck carelessly.

Letting you mark him as yours.

“Fuck, baby.” He sighed, pulling you closer and wrapping your legs around his waist. Your pencil skirt went further up your torso as your boobs spilled out of your bra thanks to his sheer force as he showed no signs of slowing down. The granite of the sink counter felt unbearably cold against your bare ass but you didn’t care. Not when this position allowed him to ram into you while you ran your glove clad fingers in his hair, moaning right into his ear, and coaxing him further.

“Cum in me Hannie.” You purred, fingers digging into his arm. “Don't you want to fuck it back into me after work? I know how much you love your own sloppy seconds.”

“Don’t.” He groaned, his thrusts becoming harsher just at the thought of it. “We have an investor meeting after work today and I need to go pick up my niece after that. We can’t, baby.”

You rolled your eyes before pulling him into a heated kiss. This was what you loved and hated about this man. From day one, he was incredibly efficient, always so aware of your schedules, of which client calls to avoid, which pen to carry to sign official documents - he was the perfect secretary, always keeping an eye on everything. He was also a perfectly good man, always donning the sweetest smile, trying to be helpful, staying alert about your smallest needs and wants. As much as you loved how he looked after you, it was seeing him being nice to everyone else that bothered you. 

Why did he have to lean over the desk of the girl clearly pretending to be stupid when he clarified her doubts? Why did he always agree to the dinners and the after work parties that various women in the company invited him to? Why did the lady in the canteen always bat her eyes at him and give him extra sandwiches? And was it your fault that one fine day nearly all these women decided to mass resign from your company? Yeah maybe you glared at them a bit too much and maybe you increased their workload to an unbearable amount but they chose to resign, that wasn’t on you right? Honestly, you should have stopped employing women after that - at least then you wouldn’t have hired her and seen her getting all handsy with your man.

“Stop thinking about her.” 

Pulling you off the counter Jeonghan spun you around, letting you look at your fucked out face in the mirror. Your lipstick was smudged at the edges and the remnants of his cum were still at the corner of your lips from when you let him fuck your mouth minutes ago. “Eyes and mind on me when I’m fucking you, sweetheart.” He grabbed your face with his hand, squeezing it roughly. “The only thought that should be in your pretty little head is me, so stop thinking about her.”

And this was yet another reason you loved this man. He knew you like the back of his hand. He could tell from the slightest change in your expression what exactly you were thinking. He could tell from the furrow of your eyebrow what exactly you needed. He could tell when you wanted to be handled softly, and gently made love to and when you needed to just be fucked like a ragdoll. Right now, you just needed him to fuck the inappropriate thoughts out of your head and that’s exactly what he was doing, snapping his hips against yours with a relentless pace. Jeonghan might be someone who looked sweet and soft and fragile but man was he capable of fucking like a beast. No wonder you fell in love with him.

The moment you realised you had fallen head over heels for him, the first thing you did was simply tell him. Though it took him a fleeting moment, he confessed that he had been in love with you for the longest time now. Brfore you could properly even kiss him, he pushed you against the office window 78 floors high and fucked you right against it, ignoring the hundreds of staff on the other side of the glass cabin who didn’t know what to do but immediately evacuate from the floor. 

Since then, you had gotten the glass tinted and the two of you had christened almost every piece of furniture in your cabin in a similar fashion. You had Jeonghan’s things moved into your office from his cubicle and at any point you were not working, there was only one thing you were doing. Rather, one man you were doing. People would walk in on you more often than you liked to admit but stopping wasn’t an option and shame really wasn't a part of your character profile anymore. Only one thing mattered, then, now and always - Jeonghan, Jeonghan, Jeonghan. 

“Oh god I’m close fuck fuck fu…” You felt your mouth hang as the feeling began to tighten in you, your legs weakening. With a hand on your back, Jeonghan pushed you onto the marble of the counter, your breasts and cheek pressed onto it, his other hand on your neck, pinning you in place

“Me too baby.” He groaned, fucking himself in you harder, momentarily forgetting how tight his grip around your neck was. The oxygen to your brain being cut off only made you feel more insane, mumbling meaningless words as you felt yourself being split open by the man you love. It was only when he saw your eyes nearly roll back that he loosened his hold, pressing his fingers into the soft skin on your hips, thrusting faster and deeper, grazing that spot again and again until you finally snapped. With a loud unintelligible moan, your walls fluttered around him, clamping his length and coating it with slick in a way that immediately sent him over the edge as he came, spilling into you in spurts. With a few more thrusts he continued to ride out his high like he didn't want to leave your warmth but when you winced at the overstimulation, he grimaced and finally pulled out.

As the two of you caught your breaths, slowly straightening yourself, you turned, finding yourself towered by him. Sighing, he caught your lips with his in a sweet kiss, in complete contrast to the way he slipped his fingers into your hole, pushing his cum further into you, for later. When the two of you finally parted, he stepped back, pulling up and buttoning his pants with a small smirk on his face. You smiled back, adjusting the panties he wasn’t even bothered to remove in his urgency, as you rang for your caretaker. Like always she would help you with your clothes, hair, makeup and make you look presentable but what was the point? Anyways, in a few hour’s time, everyone would get off work and you’d have to attend that one last meeting of the day but since it was just an audio call, you could still ride Jeonghan on your office chair while you were at it. You knew how much he loved the sight of his dick covered in his own cum pumping in and out of you so another round today was a given.

Just as Jeonghan finished dressing himself, your caretaker walked in with a fresh set of clothes, trying not to meet either of your eyes as always. Normally, Jeonghan didn’t hang around till you were made decent to the public eye, he let you have your space to dress but today it was like he could tell you wanted him around. Though his neck was littered with the red of bruises and your lipstick, and he smelled like he was doused in the sweet scent of you, the image of that woman’s hand on him kept flashing in your mind. You knew he could tell you had slipped back into those thoughts as he sighed, shaking his head. 

Putting his arm out he stopped the older woman, much to your surprise. “Let me.” 

And she did, handing your clothes to him before bowing deeply and excusing herself from there. 

Your eyes followed Jeonghan as he slowly undressed you of your wrinkled clothes, sweetly kissing you anywhere and everywhere he could. You loved feeling his mouth on you like this and you know he loved it too, you could feel his lips curl into a smile against your skin. Except when he slipped your gloves off; then his expression shifted to one of pained worry.

“What happened?” He looked at you confused. “Y/n what-“

“I’m fine.” You brushed him off, but his grip on your wrist was tight. “I wasn’t careful when I used the letter opener so it just….”

“Baby.” If he could tell you were lying, you didn’t know. He just kissed your palm softly, looking at you like he was hurting more than you were. 

This man loved you. He loved you so much. He loved you just the way you were, he always made sure to let you know just how much he cared, yet you couldn’t help but continue to obsess over that memory. 

Shaking your head, you kissed him back, long and hard. 

You had to get it out of your mind. You had to do whatever it took to get it out of your mind.

This entire weekend you didn’t get to see Jeonghan thanks to his niece’s birthday. 

As much as you shouldn’t be jealous of a little girl for getting so much of your boyfriend’s attention, you were. You didn’t like anyone getting between you and Jeonghan but knowing how much he loved her, you were willing to let it slide. You still wanted to see him first thing Monday morning so you made sure to reach work as early as you could and were waiting by the door for him. 

Instead, to your surprise and disappointment, you were met with the familiar face of just the woman you didn’t want to see as she limped in, bandages scattered all over her body, her arm in a cast, hanging in a sling around her neck. 

Running your eyes over it, a small triumphant smile creeped on your face – now let her try and touch your man.

As though on cue, Jeonghan walked in, his eyes flickering between both the women before him. Reaching for your hand he pulled out the white glove you had donned today, running his finger along the fading wound. Seeing that it was much better, he interlaced his fingers with yours, and led you away to your cabin, without sparing his colleague a second look. You though, turned around just to catch sight of her dejected face. 

As Jeonghan prepared your morning coffee, you wrapped your arms around his waist, resting your chin on his shoulder, looking at the way he meticulously pressed the coffee powder. There was no fear or possessiveness in this hug, you were just happy. Jeonghan made you happy. He always made sure you were happy. 

Since the day he began working in this company, your smile was what he craved for the most. No, not since he began working as your secretary - since he was recruited as a model, when he first laid his eyes on you. 

It was during a press conference, announcing you had joined your father's company now that you had graduated from business school. You looked so prim and proper, like a sweet little girl from a high society, a perfect heiress with your glove clad hands clasped, resting on your lap modestly. Something about you was just so…. innocent, so easy to corrupt. It made Jeonghan fear for you - The corporate world was harsh and cutthroat. Sweet little things like you didn't belong here. 

But over time Jeonghan learnt you weren't the little innocent girl you seemed like after all. He saw how ambitious you were, willing to even put down others to climb the ladder, willing to do anything. He saw your anger and the things it made you do. He saw your tantrums when you didn't get what you wanted. He saw everything because Jeonghan was always watching. Always. 

He was watching you at work, he was watching you make your way home, he was watching what you did in your little penthouse, strutting around in your pretty night dresses…. Jeonghan was always watching. That's how he knew that you liked men with longer hair, and that you preferred them blonde and tall and lean. That's how he made sure to groom himself, to become the man of your dreams. Because he knew exactly what your dreams were - afterall, he always watched you sleep too. 

That's also how he knew the number of sleeping pills you added in your father's milk weren't right. Yes you were ambitious and vile but you were short sighted. What you needed wasn't an opportunity to prove yourself but a permanent position to lead the company. That was your dream after all and Jeonghan would do whatever it took to make them come true. That's why he slipped in more pills into the glass - silly little you could surely not have thought so far.

The thing that Jeonghan didn't take into consideration though, was how inaccessible you would be to him once you became CEO. He didn’t get to see you as often and even if he did, you always had company. You were constantly monitored, always followed by security, always protected. He needed other ways of getting close to you, other ways he could keep an eye on you. 

The first step was to get your previous secretary to resign. Honestly, that was probably the hardest step along the way - no matter what Jeonghan did, and mind you, he did everything possible, she did not step down from her position. So he did what he had to make sure she never returned, to make sure they didn't ever find her.

Although he might have been a little less successful on that front - from what he heard on the news yesterday, it turned out that after all this while, they finally had found her. He just hoped that the cops didn't dig around there any further - it wasn't like anything could trace back to him, he made sure of that, but he didn't know if they could digest everything they would find in his favorite dumping spot. Afterall, he had to make all those who truly knew him disappear - he couldn't take the risk of anyone letting you know what he was capable of. Of how far he was willing to go for you.

Your caretaker knew. She was the only one who knew but Jeonghan needed her. He needed someone you trusted to recommend him to you so he dealt with her in a way that was far easier - he just promised her he would pick up her granddaughter everyday after working hours and make sure she reached home safely as long as she kept her mouth shut and introduced him to you. The old lady was a sensible one - she did what she was told. Perhaps she knew that if she didn't, no one would question if her foot were to accidentally slip and send her plunging down 78 stories. No one would care. 

But if anything similar were to happen to the colleague who was trying to make a move on him yesterday, Jeonghan knew you would be suspected. He couldn't have that happen, he couldn't have anything happen to you. 

That's why he followed the woman around over the weekend, making note of where she went and what she did, waiting for the perfect opportunity to make his move. She told all the concerned employees asking her that she was too drunk and so she didn't realise she had walked into incoming traffic and Jeonghan didn’t see the need to correct her - she didn't walk on her own will, she was shoved. 

But then again, all that happened was she broke an arm and a few ribs, and dislocated her shoulder, it was hardly anything. At least when compared to the wound on your hand because of her. All that mattered was that the sight of her finally seemed to have put a smile on your face, knowing that he wouldn't have those hands on him again. That was enough for him, your happiness was enough for him. For that he would do anything. 

“Thank you for all that you do for me Han.” You muttered against his skin breathing in the combined scent of him and the coffee as he smiled to himself. But of course.  

Topping off your drink with a tiny foam heart, he turned to hand it to you, receiving your sweet smile in return. It made him scoff inwardly. Look at you, pretending to be all innocent. 

Like you too weren’t obsessively stalking her over the weekend.

Like it wasn’t your car that caused the accident that night. 

Like you didn’t pay off the cops to let you go while your employee laid bleeding and unconscious on the road. 

You always tried to hide so much behind that saccharine smile, but how could you? How could you when he was always watching? How could you when he would do anything to be by your side? How could you when he loved you more than anything Y/n? 

More than anything and longer than always. 

A/n - This is the first time I've dabbled in a genre like this so I'm nervous - kind comments and just thoughts in general are much appreciated! Heads up, I have 4 more plots so if I can, then I shall be dropping those too hehe

[liliewrites]

Wouldn't mind requests she says.. hm then how about a soft smut for arlecchino ? I do love the way you wrote her and I'm a sucker for her being so in love with her s/o lol. Perhaps she saw you play with the children or help them with something and was overcome with the affection

Other than that I did mean to ask, are you excited for Wuthering Waves ? Some of these characters are kinda... 😳😳😳 Yinlin especially frfr

Oh and do you accept emoji anons ? Might be a bit easier lol, if you do could I have 🔥 ?

Have a lovely day :)

OMGGG HIII MY FIRST EMOJI ANON? HIIII 🔥 ANONN!!!:OO anyway, regarding WuWa, i have seen stuff about it but not really much updated about it since i've been busy but i do know that it's coming out tomorrow? iirc. but yea fear not for i WILL be playing it, BUT YEAAA yinlin omg and baizhi?? ughajshd who knows i might write about them too.. anyw enjoy anon!!!

-warning/s : NSFW, cunnilingus (r! receiving), tooth rotting fluff, super soft arlecchino, not proofread.

(men and minor dni utc!)

imo.. arlecchino is a person who genuinely loves and cares but prefers not to show emotion especially due to her profession and background (childhood too). she does not like being vulnerable at all and has trust issues with everyone, even the kids as they r still capable of betrayal, but she trusts you 100% with her vulnerability and what she sees as her "weaknesses" which is why she is more showy of her love and care towards you, hence why she is a lovesick fool for her s/o in my eyes hwjasdh sorry for yapping anyw here's ur fic that was supposed to be just a thirst.. haha.. this was also rushed and not proof-read so sorry for d mistakes.. HAHAHA (will elaborate about this behavior of hers in future fics..)

"f-father, may i have a moment?"

small hands tug on the harbinger's coat, and her deadpan eyes meet with those that belonged to a nervous toddler-- one of her children, to be specific. "what is it, my child?" she asked, tone devoid of any feeling, making it hard to guess what she was thinking, much to the child's anxiety of getting scolded by her.

"a-a.. a bouquet for you, father!"

frail little hands open up in front of her, a messy bundle of assorted wild flowers tied together with a sloppy ribbon had been presented to the knave. with a hum, the harbinger accepts the bouquet from the toddler's hands, gives her a pat on the head and the little darling scurries off.

her eyes follow the direction of where the child was headed to, the harbinger's curiosity was piqued and she wanted to know what had motivated the child to bring her flowers out of nowhere without any special occasion.

-- but as soon as she sees as to who the child runs to, she immediately has a clear answer to her question. of course, it was you, it was you who encouraged the child to give her flowers. with silent steps, she approached the slightly ajar of the bedroom's door, leaning on the wall next to it to hear your conversations with the child.

"ah, little love, have you given your father the bouquet you made?"

"y-yes mother! she even gave me a headpat.."

"hmm, now you see, my love? father is not scary at all, father can be strict with you, but it is only out of concern.. sharing is caring, little love, i am sure she'll appreciate a few flowers from time to time. now settle down, it is time for bed."

arlecchino stared at the "bouquet" in her hands, suddenly, it had more meaning to her than just a bunch of wild flowers. it was evidence of the child learning to give, and of course you were the one who taught them that. it was evidence of the child learning that they could be safe around her despite her outward appearance, and of course you were the one who assured them that. she was scary to most children, yes, for she had nurtured and raised them under the guise of a strict and unfeeling father just so she could raise them with proper discipline. although recently, even the younger kids, they have started to treat her more.. genuinely. ah, it must have been your doing. you must have been convincing them behind the scenes. she should hate you, for coaxing the kids in indulging with personal emotions that could cause them to have flaws as they grow up, but she doesn't. instead, she is thankful, because you've treated the kids with such gentleness and unconditional love-- she is thankful that you've treated her the same.

"oh! my beloved, have.. you been standing there all this time?"

a surprised gasp brings her back to her senses, the sound of the door closing behind her lover's back echoed through the hallway of the orphanage. "no, darling. i was simply checking up on you and the children, are they asleep?" arlecchino asks, choosing not to reveal to her wife that she had found out about your recent teachings. "yes, all tucked and away to dreamland." you smiled at her, walking up to her and pulling her in for a hug. the knave was not one for affection, that was made clear, but after a busy day- she cannot help but miss you too. "let's go to bed, my love. i wish to cradle you by my side tonight." you whisper to her ear, and arlecchino silently nods, her hand on your lower back.

as soon as you return to your bedroom with arlecchino, dressed in bed time clothes, the harbiner seemed to have other plans however as she immediately starts to pepper you with slow, soft and sensual kisses.

"my love, ah- you're.. strangely affectionate today, not that i don't like it, is there something on your mind?" you ask with that same gentle tone of yours, the same tone that reduces her to a lovesick fool whenever it's just you two, that lets her put down the wall she's built to let you in and show you what's inside her mind.

"nothing, my beloved.." she whispers, looking at you with adoration. it makes your heart skip a beat to see her like this. she leans in to kiss your forehead, a silent thank you for taking care of the kids.

".. i just simply wish to express my feelings. isn't that what you teach within this household?"

she adds, which confuses you a little. you were unsure about what she exactly meant, but you let her regardless. "okay, my beloved. express your feelings then." you mumbled with a silly smile, finding arlecchino's actions a bit adorable- quite similar to the children, even. arlecchino nods, a look of determination paints her face for a moment, then she leans in to kiss your cheek.

a silent thank you for loving her and seeing through her harsh demeanor. you can't help but feel flustered, feeling like a teenage girl and her first love.

she then moves on to kiss your neck in a ticklish manner, making you giggle, and it was music to her ears.

a silent thank you for introducing genuine warmth to the house of hearth. thanks to you, the orphanage burned with compassion and not with competitiveness. "beloved, aha- s-stop it!" you squirm with a chuckle, and arlecchino's face may not show it, but her heart is leaping at the sight of your gorgeous smile.

a kiss to your chest, making you gasp as her lips landed on your nipples. her tongue swirling gently around it, making you feel a subtle warmth from the intimacy of the moment.

a silent thank you for being a source of healing to her. before you, the word "mother" had brought chills up her spine, and she resented the word fiercely but after you? you had shown her what a real mother was like, and it's one of the many qualities you hold that she absolutely adores about you.

"mhm.. my beloved, is it gratitude that you wish to express?"

you asked, followed by a quiet moan as she releases your chest from her mouth with a pop. she was in awe of you, that you were able to read her mind without having to tell you. ".. yes, my beloved. how did you know?" she curiously asked, and you couldn't help but let out another chuckle. oh, this side of arlecchino was endearing, to see her openly express her thoughts. "you like to show your gratitude towards me in the form of kisses, arlecchino." you answered, bringing your hand to her head to pull her closer, then leaning in to kiss her forehead as well. "- but this is certainly the most intimate way you've shown it." you added, and she definitely felt a bit flustered. either way, arlecchino does not say a word, and chooses to continue expressing her emotions through actions.

her kisses go lower, and lower, and the sensitivity that you feel from increases.

silence rings throughout the room, except for your moans off the walls. her gratitude and devotion to you was as clear as day. her hands gently held you down by the hips as she pulled down your panties with her teeth. it was fucking hot, to see her hold you completely still with her strength alone-- and the eye contact that she kept as she stripped your pussy bare.

"my beloved, do i have permission?"

"of course, my love."

arlecchino knows that asking consent, despite it being already established beforehand, was a major turn on for you. she started by light kitten licks to your clit, making you gasp with each time her tongue made contact with the sensitive bud. the quick and light flicks were a tease, and made you tremble in anticipation.

"the mother of my children, what a pretty pussy you have.."

she mumbles in pure adoration, her breath lightly grazing against your exposed slit. you couldn't help but let out a shaky gasp of her name, "a-arlecchino.. please, do something.." you begged. "patience, my beloved." she answers, but dives right in between your legs to give your slit one, long, lick. it drove you crazy, but it felt so good. she slid her hands under your knees, bringing you closer to her, before holding onto your thighs to keep you spread apart.

"mm, you taste so splendid on my tongue, beloved.."

she moans, before finally indulging both you and her with the pleasure of her tongue roaming, exploring and pleasing your pussy. you started to squirm with the increasing intensity of her licks, and soon she was eating you out like a starved madman. thank god for strong hands, as you could barely keep yourself still, if it weren't for her holding you down you would have kept lifting yourself off the bed.

"a-arlecchino- arle-!"

you cried out her name, as her tounge darted inside you. you were close. so close. arlecchino however, was currently drunk on your moans and the taste of your slick, too busy savoring the raw taste of you, her lover. she hadn't noticed the way your cries were getting louder, or how tighter your grip on her head was becoming-- so she was surprised when you suddenly closed your thighs around her head, a bit of your fluids landing on her lips and tongue, accompanied with a loud cry of her name. she spread your legs apart once more and kept it open through the whole duration of your orgasm, wanting to see how your pussy throbbed and dripped, wanting to admire how pretty you were when you came undone because of her actions.

after you've settled down, she immediately joins you for a cuddle, she was not finished for the night- no, but she'd grant you a short moment of respite. she lays her head on your chest, closing her eyes as she listens to your heartbeat. "my love, i am still surprised how you've managed to notice my way of showing gratitude when i haven't realized it myself.", she mentions. you smiled at that, and looked at her. "to be known is to be loved. i love you, peruere."

she opens her mouth to speak, wanting to further inquire what you meant by that, but closes her mouth as she realizes what you meant once you call her peruere, the name that she hid away as it represents her past, her most fragile self, that only you've come to know instead of arlecchino, the name that spreads far and wide, which strikes fear and conquers respect from the hearts of many.

she nods in agreement, wrapping her arm around you tighter. her heart swelling from the feeling of loving and being loved, of knowing and being known. to be recognized. to be appreciated.

"i agree, my beloved. i am thankful that you've come to know me as who i really am, and stayed to love me despite what i've come to be. i love you too."

[lucy90712]

love your fics so much could you write one where jude and the reader are football player it could be fluff or like any other scenario ❤

"Mum can I go and play football with Jude?" I asked 

"As long as you are back for dinner go ahead and remember what I've taught you about being mindful of your surroundings" my mum said 

"Thank you thank you" I replied grabbing my boots and running out the door 

Jude was waiting at the end of my driveway for me with his boots and a football in hand. Before I even reached the end of the driveway he challenged me to a race to the football pitch at the end of the road. He always does this he likes to challenge me to a race when he knows I'm at a disadvantage but today I was ready and I started sprinting until I overtook him just before the entrance to the pitch. It's the first time I've beaten him in a race so I celebrated while he sulked and told me I cheated. 

To settle our argument we decided on various tests to see who was best at football which is something we also argue about a lot but it makes us better as we spur each other on to be our best. Without Jude I wouldn't be as good as I have become without him making things hard for me I wouldn't have made the academy for the local girls team but that doesn't mean I don't want to beat him. The first challenge was dribbling which I am so much better at and I beat Jude quite easily next was 1v1s which he was better at as he was able to get past me with just a bit of force. We did more challenges after that but we were still even by the end of them so we decided to settle things with a keepy uppie competition. It isn't our strong suit but we were both so determined to win that we both reached our personal bests before all of a sudden I lost control of the ball and dropped it giving Jude the win.

"That was fun we should do this again sometime and see if we've improved" Jude said 

"Yeah but for now congratulations you did well" I said 

"Thank you but you were great too you are going to kill it at the academy" he said 

"Thank you I sure hope so" I said 

"I hope we both make it as professionals would that be fun we can tell people we were friends since we were 6 and we played together every day after school we can be the best friends that conquer football" Jude said excitedly 

"That would be fun" I replied 

~~~~~~~~~~

"I'm leaving for Germany next month I signed a contract with Borussia Dortmund" Jude said 

"But we'll still stay friends right?" I asked 

"Of course I might be moving but that doesn't mean you won't still be my best friend" he said 

Those words still stick in my mind. Jude left a year ago now and he kept up with his promise for a few months but as he got busier and got more media attention he forgot about me and we lost contact. I always knew Jude would make it and I hoped that we would stay friends when he did but I was stupid to think that he'd remember me when he could have famous friends. For a while it hurt but then I used it as motivation to make myself a better player so I too could make it and become successful like Jude. 

It took a year of hard work and a lot of sacrifice but I did it. Last night I flew to Barcelona to sign my first proper contract as an fc Barcelona player. I never thought I'd get to sign for one of the best if not the best women's team in the game but clearly I made enough of an impression in the women's championship for someone to see something in me and take the chance. I know this is a big opportunity and I don't want to waste a single second of it any chance I get to play I am going to put in 110% as I know this is my chance to live my dream. 

Going to the club to have my presentation feels so surreal. The transfer announcement came out yesterday and ever since my phone has been blowing up with messages from just about everyone I've ever met in my life and my following on instagram has reached numbers I never thought I'd see. Before my presentation I had a bit of time to chill so I went to text my mum as she's been my biggest supporter and I wouldn't be here without her so I want to keep her updated on everything going on as she couldn't make it to be here today. Just as I was about to click on her contact a text popped up from the last person I expected to hear from. Jude. He must've seen something on social media and remembered my existence finally but honestly I couldn't be mad I was just happy to hear from him again. 

Jude 

Hey I've just seen the announcement congratulations I always knew you'd make it Barcelona are lucky to have you 

You 

Thank you it's been crazy but I'm so happy to be here how have you been it's been a while 

Jude

Yeah I'm sorry about that I didn't think my schedule would be so insanely busy but I've been good playing for a big team is so much fun you'll really love it 

You 

I'm already loving it I've got to go to my presentation now but promise me we'll actually keep in touch this time 

Jude

I promise and I won't break that promise this time 

~~~~~~~~~~

Jude actually kept his promise this time and we talked every day but it was like no time had passed since we last spoke. Jude has always been so easy to get along with and that hasn't changed we can speak for hours about nothing but it doesn't feel like it the time passes so quickly. After we started talking more we made time to actually see each other in our free time I'd go and visit him in Germany and he'd come and see me here not as often as we'd like but it was nice to see him again. 

Both of us had grown up a lot in the year we didn't see each other Jude had grown and he didn't look like a kid anymore. I'd never found Jude attractive until I arrived in Germany and saw him waiting for me at the airport. I didn't think I'd ever look at him that way as we've always just been friends but something about his smile and the way he'd matured made him so much more attractive to me. I tried to ignore it as we've just reconnected as friends and I needed the support of someone who's experienced their first season and knows the ups and downs. 

Ignoring it didn't last long though as Jude arrived to Barcelona to surprise me on the weekend of my debut with roses and asked me on a date after the match. I didn't see it coming at all but he explained that he'd had feelings for me for a while but after we lost contact he'd pushed them to the back of his mind until we started talking again and he couldn't ignore them anymore. I was a little hesitant as I was scared that things wouldn't work out but after our first date all those worries went out the window as it was just so perfect I felt like a little kid with a crush the entire time which is not something I've felt on any other date. 

We went on a few more dates before Jude asked me to officially be his girlfriend. Since then we've made a lot more effort to see each other as much as we can even if it means flying to random cities to catch each other for a few hours or using our days off to go and see the other play in important matches. It's not easy to be so far apart and have schedules that don't work together but we've made it work and it makes our time together so much more special so we have to soak up every second we get together. The hardest part has been the uncertainty of football you never know when you are going to get hurt or when another team might make an offer and you'll have to move to another country but we've been really lucky so far that nothing has gone too wrong. 

~~~~~~~~~~

Barcelona star under fire after details of relationship with new Real Madrid signing Jude Bellingham emerge 

The new Romeo and Juliette? How did the forbidden relationship between y/n y/l/n and Jude Bellingham begin

Questions about y/n's commitment to Barcelona as relationship with Jude Bellingham is confirmed 

I should've seen it coming after Jude told me about his move to Real Madrid but I thought people would have enough common sense to realise that Jude and I got together long enough ago that he wasn't a Real Madrid player at the time. It also shouldn't, matter my commitment to my team shouldn't be based on who I'm dating and I shouldn't be receiving so much hate over it especially when Jude isn't getting any. Jude has been great though he's been defending me and our relationship in interviews and he's been telling me that what other people think doesn't matter as we know what we have and that it doesn't affect our careers at all. 

I wasn't worried about the media though they can think whatever they want I was worried about my teammates and if they would judge me. It was stupid to think that though as instead of acting cold towards me or judging my choices the first thing they asked was if I was ok after the barrage of hate online. They all understood that I'm more than my relationship and that I didn't have control over Jude's career. Having their support meant a lot to me as my team is incredibly important to me and I'd never want to break their trust but luckily they don't see this situation as me betraying them like everyone else seems to think. 

~~~~~~~~~~

Today was the most nerve wracking day of my life the champions league final the biggest match of my career so far. All of my friends and family including Jude were coming to the match which added to the pressure I was putting on myself as I didn't want to let any of them down after they travelled to watch me play. My teammates were also counting on me as I've become a vital member of the team with the injuries we've had and of course I don't want to let them down either not after they've had so much faith in me from the minute I arrived. 

It was a hard match the first half was tough but eventually we were able to make a break through and somehow the ball ended up by my feet and I knew I had to just go for it which I did and the ball went straight past the goalkeeper and into the net. The feeling of scoring a goal in such an important game can't be described I felt like I was going to cry but also explode with excitement at the same time. That feeling carried me for the rest of the game until the end where we finished the match winning 2-0. Hearing the final whistle is when I finally let my tears go I just couldn't hold them in anymore as all of the adrenaline I've been feeling all day came crashing down. I'd just won the biggest trophy of my career and I scored a goal it all just felt so surreal. 

The trophy presentation went by so fast and before I knew it friends and family were allowed on the pitch. The first person I saw as my mum so I ran straight to her to hug her and of course she was crying which made me cry again but we still shared a lovely moment together. Then I saw Jude who was smiling so much as he picked me up off the ground and spun me round while kissing me. Once he put me down I showed him my medal and I started rambling about the game as I love to talk to him about all my games as he understands what I'm talking about. As we were talking a tv crew came over and the presenter asked us to do an interview. 

"Jude you must be so proud that was a great match for the whole team but especially y/n" the interviewer asked 

"Yeah I couldn't be prouder I think y/n has shown everyone that she's an amazing player that isn't affected by the unnecessary hate she receives online" Jude answered 

"We know that there was a lot of backlash over your relationship has that affected you at all" they asked 

"I didn't receive much hate it was all directed at y/n very unfairly but no it hasn't affected either of us we are still both dedicated to our clubs like we always have been even before I moved to Madrid and we support each other no matter what as it's not like we will ever play against each other so I will always be her biggest cheerleader" Jude said 

"That's very sweet I'm glad you are both happy together and congratulations on the win y/n hopefully you can do the same in a few weeks Jude" the interviewer said

Jude's interview really made me blush as he's always stood up for me but to be stood right next to him and hear him say all these things while he held me tightly to his side made me fall even more in love with him. Once the interview was over Jude told me to forget about all the hate and the people who don't like and to just enjoy the moment which he's right about this is a big moment in my career and I need to just soak it all in. There is no one I'd rather soak it all with than Jude so I'm glad he's by my side. 

[chaoticbardlady99]

Yesterday I Felt like Dancing (Astarion x GN! Reader)

Synopsis: You have burnt both ends of the candle and haven’t been taking care of your mental health. Unable to get yourself out of bed, Astarion begins to worry about you…

Author note- I have been hardcore struggling with my mental health lately and writing my silly little fics has been the only thing pulling me along. I thought it might be therapeutic to write about my current feelings (I have ADHD, MDD, and GAD so it’s a party up in here). I hope you enjoy!

CW- Suicidal Ideation, symptoms of depression, brief outburst, mentions of mental health diagnosis and poor medical advice.

Title inspired by song “Into the Walls” by Griff.

*not my pic, could not tell you where I found it so I apologize in advance. If you think it might be your picture, please message me so I can give proper credit.

Your last day before backtracking from the Mountain Pass to the Goblin camp is a difficult one.

Not for the group as a whole- just you specifically.

Days before a Mindflayer kidnapped you, a healer back home had told you your brain was sick. You had been devastated- resigned to your miserable fate.

You had been struggling for years at that point with inconsistent motivation, exhaustion, nightmares, and irrational thoughts for months. You have been functional for the most part, but then an overpowering wave will hit you like Warhammer in the ribs and you are rendered useless until it passes.

The healer suggested sunlight, exercise, eating healthy, and spending time with friends to help your affliction when you hit rock bottom. You were wildly unimpressed with her. At the time, you preferred to self isolate so you stayed by yourself in the woods trying to find peace there. You would have to let her know that her “going out and enjoying the sun” message is not always wise- you may get a tadpole shoved in your head. You can’t be that mad though- the tadpole helped bring your pep back.

Anyway, you have been doing all of that for weeks now, you even felt great, but today? You could not have hit rock bottom harder even if you tried.

You woke up that morning unable to get yourself out of bed. It was a rest day so it wasn’t a big deal, but you also know that your companions are going to have things they need to talk to you about and favors they need you to take care of.

Gods you had tried to get up. You are grateful that your past self had the gumption to wash off and change into clean clothes last night, but your armor is still disgustingly sitting outside your tent and your hair is long and wild. You had wanted to braid it, but it all felt like too much work.

Everything feels like too much work right now- even staying awake- so you drift in and out of uncomfortable naps throughout the morning. No matter how many times you fall asleep, begging for relief from the painful brick wall sitting on your brain, it never leaves.

You can feel the midday breeze rustle your tent. You’ve been laying here for hours now. You are crying and you honestly aren’t sure why. You feel completely paralyzed by all the things you need to do to be ready for the Underdark.

You need to clean your armor, go over the Goblin Camp’s map with Wyll, find Gale a magical artifact, and probably comfort Lae’zel since she’s been branded a heretic- but you won’t. The shame and self loathing continues. You are a silly, worthless little human being.

Every person who knocks on your tent gets a simple, “I’m just not feeling well,” and then they walk away. You don’t know why it makes you more sad than appreciative. If you were in their shoes- you would be bending over backwards to make sure they had everything they needed and you wouldn’t let them feel alone. Then you resent yourself for feeling that way towards your companions- they don’t owe you anything and you were the one who chose to help them- you didn’t ask for anything in return. This is all your fault.

The only person who hadn’t come to visit you was Astarion- which hurt your heart just a little, enough that the numbness coursing thickly through your body wavered for a moment. You are quite smitten and he is obviously not. Another mistake to add to the swirling black hole your mind has fallen into.

You knew it was stupid to want his comfort and affections- you had merely slept together a little less than a week ago. Astarion has been quasi avoiding you ever since and when he does talk to you- he’s awkward. You constantly look for flying pigs- Astarion feeling awkward or being awkward is unheard of.

You have come to accept that you were just some tryst and obviously he hadn’t enjoyed it as much as he said he did.

Astarion isn’t to blame and the situation itself certainly didn’t contribute to the sudden lack of emotions. You knew that you were on the verge of a mental collapse sooner rather than later, but you had foolishly hoped you wouldn’t be alone through it. It feels less all consuming when you try to find a reason. It’s more comfortable to know than it is to give up and say, “my brain is fucked and there isn’t a damn thing I can do so I guess I’m stuck here.”

You are jolted out of your thoughts by another knock on your tent.

“I’m sick,” you say flatly.

“Ha- you act like that will deter me. I can’t even get sick, Darling.”

Before you even have time to register that Astarion is on the other side of your tent- he pushes his way through the flaps and stares down at you in confusion. And… concern?

Astarion steps inside and kneels down next to you- scanning you for evidence of illness or injury.

“I suppose I had been worried for nothing,” he smiles sweetly at you, “you are totally fine. Come on Darling, you have to get up and eat. Wyll is fumbling with that map.”

You look at him and begin to cry. Astarion’s face lights up with alarm.

“What- what did I do!?”

“Please don’t make me,” you sob, “I just want a break. I’m so tired. I want to lay in this bed forever and never leave, but there is so much to do and it’s paralyzing.”

You continue to cry and you cover yourself with the extra blanket- successfully hiding your face.

“Go away,” you whisper, “I need to be left alone.”

You say it, but you are far from meaning it. You want him to stay- to hold you- but he doesn’t want you so it will only make everything hurt worse once the numbness fades away.

You wait for several moments and then you hear him leave. Your silent cry turns into choked sobs and your body is shaking from the pain you are in. The numbness hurts. The numbness tells you that you shouldn’t be alive.

Maybe you shouldn’t be.

Everyone here would be able to figure it out on their own (eventually) and you would finally be free. Free of your uncomfortable brain, free of your ugly body- free of the expectations of others. You would no longer be holding them back like you are today- like you will again in the future.

You are sure they would temporarily grieve you, but that was the deal with this whole journey. You had all accepted that one of you or all of you could die at any moment. You will just put them in more danger by being here…

You shake the thought from your head, violently- your head is pounding from the growing tension headache and dehydration. The tears eventually stop and you just… well, lay in bed again. You stare blankly at a book over in the corner. You keep trying to convince yourself to get up and read the damn thing- do literally ANYTHING else than just stay here in your bedroll.

Instead, you fall asleep.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

You wake up to someone knocking on your tent post. You grumble incoherently, covering your head and you hear your unexpected guest sit down next to you. The smell of food fills the tent and your stomach grumbles.

“You need to eat, my Dear,” Astarion says softly.

You are stunned to hear his voice grace your ears. You slowly pull the blanket down to just below your eyes and look at him. Astarion looks distressed, like he doesn’t want to be here. Why would he? You’re a nuisance.

You sit up gingerly and grab the bowl from him. You manage to give him a lopsided smile.

“Thanks. You don’t need to stay, I will be fine on my own,” you say apathetically, staring into the broth.

“I want to stay,” he says, “if you’ll have me.”

The expression on his face is unreadable, but he seems genuine. You nod, your lips pressed together tightly. You eat as much as you feel like while Astarion studies you.

Usually your anxiety is at an all time high (in maybe one of the better ways) when you are around Astarion- he gives you butterflies, butterflies, and even more butterflies. Usually your heart is racing in his presence, but right now you just feel empty.

“Where is your hairbrush?” Astarion asks.

You frown with confusion, “it’s in my bag, why?”

Astarion gets up and goes over to the bag- digging out a few items. He pulls out a lantern, your hairbrush, and a hair tie. Astarion comes over to you and sits down behind you. You feel him gather up the stray pieces of your hair and get to work.

Astarion runs his fingers through your scalp and your tangled hair- the feeling is soothing and it opens something inside of you. Your body shakes silently with sobs and you feel the worm behind your eyes wiggle as Astarion asks for access. You aren’t sure.

“I want to understand,” Astarion says, “please.”

His voice is so raw and desperate- you swallow thickly before allowing him to explore your current emotional state. The silence in the tent is palpable and you feel tense, uncomfortable even. No one has ever cared for you while you are in this state before.

You feel him continue his hairbrushing after he exits your mind. Astarion leaves soft kisses on your shoulder as he gently pulls apart every knot. It helps- you realize- to feel cared for. The numbness still hurts, you still hurt, but it’s nice to not feel so alone.

After Astarion is done brushing your hair, you feel his delicate fingers begin to intricately braid your hair. You wonder when he learned how to do hair.

“Leon’s daughter, Victoria, used to ask me to braid her hair all the time,” Astarion says in a bittersweet voice as if reading your mind, “I picked it up so that she would stop bugging me about it. She said and I quote, ‘you have the perfect braiding hands!’”

You smile to yourself tenderly, “That’s very kind of you, Star. I am sure she appreciated it as much as I appreciate it now.”

You feel Astarion’s hands falter at your words and you are unsure if you have upset him or not. A pregnant pause occurs before Astarion finally clears his throat and goes back to braiding your hair.

“I’m glad that I can help,” Astarion’s delicate, vulnerable words hang in the air, “I’ve… been worried about you today.”

You feel positively flustered and bad for making him feel that way.

“Oh you don’t need to worry about silly ole me! This happens sometimes” you make your voice chirpier than it needs to be, “This is actually the longest I’ve gone for a long time without this happening. I have theorized that the tadpole might help which is kinda cool- I think?”

You laugh awkwardly- desperate to ease his worry.

“How often does this happen?”

Shit. That was the winning question wasn’t it? Astarion will surely never see you as anything less than broken now.

“I’m not really sure,” your voice comes out in a whisper, “I usually always feel a bit of it all the time, but it’s manageable. I function very well regardless.”

“But this one isn’t manageable and evidently you aren’t functional right now.”

You sigh, “No, it isn’t and no, I’m not.”

“What changed?”

“Nothing,” you say, maybe too harshly, “that’s the part that drives me crazy. Yesterday was incredible- I was on top of the whole world, felt like dancing and screaming from the rooftops, but today!?”

You inhale and hold back the muted scream that wants to fill the air.

“Today,” you hiss, “I don’t even want to deal with any of this shit anymore. I’m so fucking tired. There is too much to fucking do and too many people depending on me. Then everyone gets irritated with me if I ask to push off their problems so I persevere through it despite knowing I’m getting bad again. I’m a giant stinking trash heap that everyone keeps adding more to.”

Astarion finishes braiding your hair and presses your back to his chest, pulling you into him. He puts his arms around your waist and settles his chin and face in between the crook of your neck.

“I just feel like such a nuisance all the time- no matter how hard I push myself to prove I’m not. Sometimes I think everyone would be better off if I just… went away.”

You both sit there quietly. At some point he had taken one of your hands in his and he was tracing shapes into the back of it with his thumb. Your omission still hangs heavily in the air.

“I wouldn’t be better off,” Astarion says hotly, “I’d be stuck with all these weirdos by myself. That would be truly miserable, Darling.”

You shake your head, a half smile on your face.

“And besides- you are not even close to a nuisance,” Astarion states, leaving a kiss on your cheek, “at least you aren’t in constant need of magical objects to eat or blood to drink. Oh and you don’t require a painstaking amount of searching to prevent you from literally burning everyone alive.

“Oh and did I forget to mention, we have not one, but two women who despise each other and follow hateful Goddesses which was a fun choice for whatever sick bastard twisted our fates this way.”

You laugh breathily, closing your eyes and letting the sound defrost some of your insides.

“What I’m saying is- I think you are the least of everyone’s ‘nuisances’, my Darling,” he says, squeezing you tighter to his chest, “despite how little you think of yourself. We ne- no, I want you to stay. I know everyone else would say the same, but I must emphasize that I would be horribly distraught if you disappeared. Hells I’d even pay to have you resurrected.”

You gasp playfully, your voice falling slightly flat, “You? The most frugal man I have ever met would pay 200 gold coins to ‘Strike thy name from the record’?”

Your impression of Withers gets Astarion to genuinely laugh- the sound vibrating in your chest. You lean into him and he guides you back to laying down. Astarion entangles his legs with yours as he holds you tightly- your faces are mere centimeters apart. You love the way Astarion smells- rosemary, bergamot, and brandy. You wish you could be wrapped up in him forever. You are still in pain- everything still hurts and feels too difficult, but right now it feels a little less heavy.

“I would throw bags of Gold Coins at that corpse out of revenge, my Dear,” he teases, “you couldn’t possibly think I would ever let you rest peacefully in your grave- I would be far too angry with you and unhappy without you to let that happen.”

You lay there and despite yourself, you lean forward and leave butterfly kisses along his cheeks with your lashes. Astarion scrunches up his nose reflexively and smiles at you. You plant a sweet, short kiss on his lips.

“Thank you Astarion- for everything.”

You close your eyes as he traces circles along your lower back. Your eyes begin to droop, and you fall asleep.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When you wake up the next morning- you are disappointed to find that you are all alone in your tent. The heavy numbness is still there and you sigh. At least last night made it more bearable.

You look on the side where Astarion had been sleeping and find a note with a bottle attached to it. You pick it up and begin to read.

Tav,

Astarion had asked me about herbs for some relief regarding mental discomforts. I unfortunately don’t know many, but this is a mixture of St. John’s Wort, Valerian Root, and Ashwagandha. Historically, I know these have been used to alleviate emotional and mental pain.

Astarion didn’t tell me why he was asking, but I deduced it was you pretty quickly when he began shooing everyone away from your tent this morning.

I hope this helps- we are all here if you need us. May Silvanus light your path as you navigate this difficult time.

-Halsin

You sit in your own stunned silence for what feels like hours. Halsin knows and he wants to help? Halsin doesn’t think you are screwed or a nuisance? The man barely even knows you!

You are a bit embarrassed, but you can’t help but laugh at the image of Astarion telling everyone to leave you alone.

You open the bottle and a pleasant, earthy smell fills the tent. You drink the mixture (that definitely does not taste anywhere near as pleasant as it smells) and you do feel a slight bit better. Your apathy feels even more tolerable now. You will have to thank Halsin.

You slowly rise from your tent and look around. Everything is packed up neatly in the corner- your clothes from the previous day are folded nicely and you notice all the holes are sewn up.

You jump when someone enters your tent abruptly- the midday sun warming your skin. You turn around and Astarion is smiling at you, but looks nervous.

“I cleaned off your armor and your weapons,” he says awkwardly, scratching the back of his head, “I also packed up your stuff- as you can see. We have to start leaving unfortunately, but I’ll help you get on your armor like I usually do- I might still need help with mine though, but I can ask someone else if it’s too much for you right now. Lae’zel and Karlach offered to pack up your tent. Wyll and Shadowheart figured out the map- Wyll is going to be our ‘fearless’ leader for the day. Gale has some food for you to snack on while we travel- which you will be eating, by the way.”

Astarion is looking at you with a vulnerable expression on his face. He plays nervously with the gold coin in his hands.

You can hardly believe what you are hearing.

“Did- did you do all this for me?” You say with disbelief.

You never thought Astarion was capable of smiling shyly until he had admitted to you that you had been his first thinking creature- you certainly never thought you’d see him become shy twice in your presence.

“I did and it wasn’t a nuisance so don’t even begin to worry about that,” He walks over to you, gently cradling your face in his hands, “I hope this is all okay.”

You smile- the first genuine feeling of happiness you’ve felt in the last 24 hours gently sparks in your chest as you stare up at him. You get up on your tiptoes and bridge the gap between your lips.

“Thank you Astarion, this is perfect- you are perfect,” you are crying tears of joy, “this is the kindest gesture anyone has ever made for me. So just, thank you.”

“Of course, Darling,” he says smiling in between kisses, “I won’t let you lose to yourself. We’ll get through this together from now on- no more hiding.”

And for once? You actually believe someone.

-if you guys like this, please let me know if you would want a part two written from Astarion’s perspective.

Update- I did the thing you silly geese

https://www.tumblr.com/chaoticbardlady99/735969926279528448/i-took-all-this-love-i-found-and-i-hope-that-its

Tag-list: @spacebarbarianweird @domainoflostsouls

[potol0ver]

Ask; Hello, I read you have your request open, and I really like how you write about Erik. So, if you feel in the mood, I like some scenario (GN or AFAB) in which y/n starts to work ato Opera House like an skilled effect artist and one night, when y/n finally has some time free and alone, Erik found her playing something like ROxxanne tango with the cello, because she play it but only for herself.

Tags; Fluff, GN reader (you and yours),

A/N; Hey, I’ve been silent for a while and I’m sorry for that. I wasn’t motivated to post any fics and was in writers block. Now I need to focus on my health because a serious health concern has come up for me, so I apologize for continuing to be radio silent. I’m a little out of it while I’m writing this so I’m sorry, Please injoy this fic, it will most likely be the last for a while. (You may continue sending asks just be warned I might not be able to get to it for a couple of reasons.)

With a heavy sigh you put aside your art peice, a stage mask that just wasn’t holding up to your standards. You’ve painted over your dried paint and wiped it off to many times to count already. Your hands had become shaky long ago as you sit at your desk that was in an obscure corner of the Opera house.

You push your chair back that gave a screech and sluggishly walked back to your small room in the Opera house. Thankfully it looks like none of your roommates are in the room which means you can properly relax and wind down. Most importantly in your mind, it means you can practice your cello without disturbing anyone.

Quickly you set up your space, adjusting your chair, setting up your music stand, making sure your bow has enough rosin. Flipping to your favorite cello peice you take a breath and start playing. Letting your fingers and how move on the strings fluently, you we’re getting entranced by your cello. Unknown to you, you weren’t the only one being entranced.

Somewhere deep in the Opera house, the Phantom can hear your playing faintly thanks to the echoing of the monumental walls. Intrigued, Erik quietly yet softly made his way to you until he could hear you clearly. Leaning against a wall he let his eyes shut and get wrapping up in your music, loving where you crescendoed and adding your own flare.

When you got to the end of the piece and pause your playing to find another to play, he finally peeked a look at you. He thought you would’ve been apart if the orchestra, but he didn’t recognize you, it also looked your your cello while well kept, was quite old to. Erik became very fascinated by you now, he started by “testing” you. Slipping new and harder pieces for you to try, and if you did play them he’d be happily surprised with how well you make the notes come to life.

Next, after you passed his “test”, he worked hard to see if he can find you a proper newer cello. Only the best for his new found talent, that day by day he was slowly falling for. The more he became infatuated with you he got more determined to find a cello to match your one of a kind soul.

After a while he did find a very good cello, a one of a kind, just for you. So, Erik made quick work to insure it’s yours. He personally polished and cleaned it, making sure no scratches were on the instrument. While you were working hard at your props job for the play, he made diligent work to set up the present in your new room. That of course was also a present from him. How could he let his musical muse share a room with a bunch of strangers?

Leaning the cello against the bedside table he placed a rose and a note next to it. Despite watching you for so long and being so devoted to you, he never got to the courage to say anything to you. Hopefully the grand presents will be a good first impression.

Groggily you walk back to your room, only to be told you don’t sleep there any more. Which after the long day you had of making props wasn’t good for your anxiety. As you followed the directions to your new room, you think about how you could’ve gotten on the bad side of someone to get an even more run down place to sleep in than what you have already had.

All of those thoughts quickly got washed away when you opened the door to your new room. It had everything you needed to live alone, a small kitchen/living room, a nice bedroom with a decent sized closet, even a space to practice your cello. You were so stunned at what you did to deserve this new room that you didn’t question how everything you own was already there.

Quickly, your eyes caught the sight of the luxurious cello next to your new bed. Gently you caressed it, looking over all of the fine details, it looked like a masterpiece that was specifically catered to you. The red rose next to the cello caught your eye next, along with the letter that had a skull stamp.

Carefully opening the letter you scanned the words, a mixture of your emotions sitting in your stomach as you read.

“My dear, I have heard you playing for a while now, and I must say the way you make the notes come to life is hauntingly stunning. You have caught my interest in the best way.

I know you haven’t seen me or heard me before, which is why I hope your new room and house warming gifts are a good first impression. If you wish, I can also arrange a seat for you in the opera’s orchestra so you don’t have to continue working in the messy arts department.

P.S. If it’s not to much to ask, I would like to hear back from you, so please consider us to be pen pals now. Also, if you ever need a quiet place to practice you can always come to my lair to whine down, maybe that way we can play music together.

~Yours devotedly O.G.”

A single thought ran through your mind as a mixture of unease and swooning butterflies ran through you…

What have you gotten yourself into?

[thebibliosphere]

What are your thoughts on authors writing and posting fanfiction of their own work? Do you think being self published vs traditionally published makes a difference? I tried searching around about the topic before but found nothing conclusive, other than the statement, "if you're the owner of the work, you might as well make more money off of it," which doesn't sit right with me.

I mean, I'm quite (in)famously writing an AU fic of my own work (Sugar Vladdy) purely for fun and because Tumblr has a unique ability to pilot my lack of impulse control like the ADHD version of Ratatouille.

Numerous people have told me they'd buy Sugar Vladdy if I ever decided to make it into a proper book. Frankly, I'm not interested in that because my motives for writing Hunger Pangs vs. Sugar Vladdy were different.

Writing for profit vs writing for fandom occupy different spaces in my brain. They scratch different itches. Yes, I'm playing around with the same characters. But I'm sort of just treating it like enrichment in my enclosure. It lets my brain throw around all the ideas that wouldn't work for those characters within the canon universe but still likes to go, "Oh, but what if..."

Honestly. No idea how much of that is my ADHD or what, but that's the only way I can explain it. They're the same, but they're not. They're fun in different ways. And I can get away with it because I'm self-pub. I haven't sold the rights to anyone. The world and characters are mine. I can put my blorbos into situations if I want to.

Now, if I were trad-pub, there would probably be a lot of restrictions about what I can and cannot do surrounding my own characters because I've sold the rights for X amount of time. I couldn't just give things away. It might be considered a breach of contract if I did. It'd definitely be something I'd need to run by an agent first just to make sure.

As for not liking the "might as well make money off it" mindset, as a literal struggling writer who lives paycheck to paycheck, I'm not going to judge anyone who keeps their official work as for profit only. People deserve to be paid for their labor. If they/we want to create stuff away for free, that's up to us.

Would I personally find it stifling and joy-killing to only ever write for profit? Yes. But that's a me thing. Not a universal thing.

[sufferu]

i really like ur fic so far. 10/10♥️

I have been an anastasia hater since the start. So I hope to see stuff from her perspective. What would her reaction be when she realises she duped an innocent and desperate man for her own gain and left him and his friends die Just to get a leg up on her political opponent. She can't use the excuse that anything she did "didn't matter cuz the loop failed therefore I didn't do it" BRO you did THAT. Babygirl u have the biggest information network out of anyone u didn't need to manipulate a desperate man to get what u want.

And how would Julius even react to that? The lady he swore loyalty to doing something scummy like that. To his friend too. And now she wants to butt her nose in another camps business? And tell them to do this and that? Like damn girl

I am absolutely biased but I have a point.

Thank you so much for the praise! I am very much enjoying the story and I have a lot of plans so ;) look forward to that!

Though…I see your criticism of Anastasia, but I raise you: in that loop, Anastasia was trying to teach Subaru a lesson.

Obviously it wasn’t her ONLY motivation here, but — the lady set up The Most Obvious Trap in the world that anyone with a lick of self-awareness would have been able to see through in like five seconds (fucking hell all of her men were still in uniform and they were sitting in the middle of the room), took her time to play out an actual negotiation as a test, and then when she got what she wanted took the time to spell out exactly what she saw as his greatest flaw and what he had to do in order to improve. Hell — this is directly paralleled in the (LN) final loop, where Julius goes out of his way to give Subaru a clear test the next time they meet in the form of dragging him into an impromptu negotiation table and practically frog-walking him through a shoddier version of what Anastasia had set up in that restaurant (AFTER negotiations had already been settled, as evidenced by Mimi very nearly completely blowing Julius’ cover in her confusion about what he’s doing). Hell, you could even make the argument that it’s implied she tried to teach Subaru a lesson like that on JULIUS’ behalf, considering the extent to which that man goes throughout this arc to try and guide this dumbass to a path of self-improvement.

Doesn’t change the fact that it was HORRIBLY cruel in retrospect. Like, even putting aside the fact that Subaru was crawling to her in desperation after (from his POV) watching all his loved ones die horribly TWICE and also being chained and psychologically tortured in a cave for several hours, thus making it nowhere near the time or place to try and teach him about being more self-aware — the lesson that Anastasia would have been trying to teach him in that loop was THE WRONG LESSON. Self-absorption isn’t the thing that Anastasia would likely see as Subaru’s core flaw within everything that happens in Arcs 1 and 2: she’d actually probably think that he’s WAAAY too selfless, to the point where he’s repeatedly destroying himself for the sake of other people who hardly deserve it and kinda completely ignoring any ideas of proper compensation for his effort. In fact, Anastasia might even look at it like “THIS IS THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT HE SHOULD BE LEARNING RIGHT NOW. I’M MAKING IT WORSE.”

(And as for her butting into another Camp’s business — well. I have a scene planned for the next chapter, so I’ll leave it at that for now.)

[swifty-fox]

how is dom gale fic coming along 🤭🤭

*kicks it* it's 10k 25 word doc pages and nobodys even TOUCHED a penis yet

Gale is giving him a moment to come back to himself, but one arm is tucked across his torso expectantly. There’s a part of John that toys with pushing more, pressing buttons just to see what they’ll do. But there’s a bigger part that wants to roll belly-up and let Gale lead him by the leash. Wanted more of that quiet approval that he didn’t have to fight for. Mostly, he wants Gale touching him again.

Dragging his tongue across his teeth a couple times, feeling the tender stretch of the muscle, he clears his throat and tries to remember how to translate words from his brain to his mouth. That cottony feeling is back, headier than ever and he wants nothing more than to lay down and float in it.

“I’m sorry, Sir.” 

“Not so hard is it?” Gale says with a smile, once again stepping into John’s space and he sags back against the mans hip with relief.

One hand pets over John’s hair like a dog, scritching pleasantly at his temples and sending shivers down his body. He nuzzles into the dark fabric of his slacks, mouth half open so he can taste along as smell the scent of his body, his cologne. Gale’s fingers, still deliciously gloved, trail over the shell of his ear, drag along his jaw and slip back inside his mouth to rub over the fading hurt on his tongue in soft circles. John sucks the digit obediently, wonders how many of his fingers compare to the size of his cock and debates if asking would be met with disapproval.

“You know how to be good, with the proper motivation.” Gale continues, drawing his thumb out to press it in firm circles over John’s bottom lip. 

“Yes sir,” John croaks, which is different from the voice in his head that supplied a sniping counter, be more motivated if I got your pretty cock down my throat. 

His arousal is a desperate itch, if he could just geta hand on himself and nothing more he might be able to think. He flexes against the cuffs slightly, thinks if he really wanted to he could pop the stitching holding them together but.

But.

Gale wouldn’t like that.

Gale watches him relax, settling back into himself. His eyes flicker and this time John cannot place the emotion he catches there. His hand smooths over John’s cheek, fingertips threading through the soft curly hairs around his ear and rasping pleasantly over his stubble. John closes his eyes, leans into the touch and tries to compartmentalize away the way his shivering breaths make him feel like a dog panting at Gales side.

[ssa-montgomery]

in my imagination, you're waitin' lyin' on your side (with your hands between your thighs)

Word Count: 6799

Summary: Y/N's sexual frustration over Daryl gets the best of her and she takes things into her own hands, but what she wasn't counting on was Daryl seeking her out mid-session.

Characters: Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Swearing, smut, oral sex (fem receiving), fingering, dirty talk, praise kink, unprotected sex, slight breeding kink, masturbation, reader is walked in on, orgasm control, orgasm denial/delay, begging, dom/sub, use of submissive terms (good girl), mention of scars.

A/N: Yet another request from @azanoni from my prompt requests and I had so much fun writing this! I had been looking for an excuse to write a fic with this premise for so long and it's finally here! I have to admit I had a bit of an excited freak out when I saw this request. I hope you all enjoy yet another Daryl fic! Please do keep the requests coming in :D

I apologise if you've seen this fic pop up on your timeline a couple of times today! I'm having some issues with it being hidden from the tags :/ Hoping a repost later in the day might help!

Prompt(s): "Shit I'm sorry I didn't mean to- I um should've knocked."

Feedback is what motivates me to work so please let me know what you think! Reblogs are also greatly appreciated.

Taglist is open!

Masterlist

The safety of the farm had quickly become one of your favourite places in the prison to spend your free time. Admittedly it wasn't much, just a few patches of land you'd managed to sow with help from Hershel's farming experience and the small few animal pens that had recently been built to house the horses and chickens found by the community but you found it peaceful there. Sometimes all you needed was an escape from the constant reminders of the broken thing the world beyond these fences had become and tending to the farm let you provide food for your people without ever having to go out on a run, the physical work in the soil helping to calm your mind. 

When you'd found Beth in your usual spot you offered to help her for the morning. That's how you found yourself kneeling in the dirt, digging around in the soil to pull loose the tangled roots of the weeds that had now started to show among the vegetables. The early autumn sun was warm against your skin while you worked out in the open but you didn't mind. The heat and easy conversation offered you an escape from the thoughts that had been plaguing your mind worse than usual since you woke that morning.

You were sure that by now your attraction to Daryl Dixon was no secret among the community of the prison, after all, you were far from shy about it. You'd developed a puppy dog crush on him that first day that he and the group welcomed you into the prison and it had only spiralled out of control since then. It was more than just butterflies and flushed cheeks every time you talked now, it was a need that had grown into something stronger, an undeniable pull towards the man.

Everyone that took the time to look in your direction was aware of the not-so-secret flirting on your end, the teasing comments you'd pester him with at every meal that would have him snapping at anyone that wasn't you. They'd all seen the subtle touches to his arms and shoulders, the longing stares whenever he was around. It was far from hidden but it seemed the only person who wasn't aware of your attraction was Daryl himself.

He remained oblivious to any and all of your attempts. No matter how much you tried to hint at what you really wanted from the archer it all seemed to fall on deaf ears as all you got in response were friendly but awkward compliments mumbled in return and nothing more. You hoped that it was him being unable to pick up on the social cues of your flirting and not that he was simply uninterested in you like that.

One of these days you were going to have a make a proper move on him. Something bold and obvious enough even to him, something that he wouldn't be able to deny that you wanted him anymore. Something that would finally show him what everyone else around you already saw but for now, you simply didn't have the courage. 

 You were lost in the thought of it, only being pulled back to reality by a low noise approaching the prison. You recognised it immediately, the rumble of tires as they rolled over the gravel. You had spent one too many days standing out here, waiting for that sound while you held your breath, waiting for the safe return of your people. You looked up from the clump of weeds in your hand to see the van Daryl and Rick had taken out that morning rolling to a stop just a few feet away from you.

There were certain spots in the fence that were growing weaker than anyone was comfortable with because of the number of walkers that had been attracted to the prison recently, the chain links threatening to give out under their weight as they pressed against it. Daryl and Rick headed out early that morning, tasked with finding the resources to reinforce the fence in any way they could. You watched as they exited the van one by one and your eyes locked on Daryl the second his feet hit the ground, following his movements as he made his way around the back of the van to release the door.

You leaned back sitting on your heels in the dirt as you slid off your gloves, watching Daryl bend over to try and pull one of the heavy wooden pallets they'd found on the scavenge from the van. From where you were sitting you couldn't see what they'd managed to bring home, Daryl's broad back blocking your view but you certainly weren't complaining. He leaned further into the back and propped one foot up onto the van trying to give himself some leverage as he reached for the back corner of the pallet sliding it towards Rick but in the process the movement made his shirt ride up, giving you the perfect view of his lower back.

You knew you shouldn't have let yourself indulge in this as much as you were but already you could feel that need you'd grown all too familiar with starting in the pit of your stomach. You couldn't tear your eyes away from the way the muscles in his shoulders moved under his skin, straining against the weight. No matter how much you tried to fight it your mind was starting to wander, imagining what those muscles would feel like under your hands, straining instead with the effort of holding himself above you. The Georgian sun had covered his skin in a thin layer of sweat and you couldn't help but wonder what he would look like sweating like that thanks to an entirely different heat. You pressed your thighs together, hoping to ease some of the desperation that seemed to have settled under your skin. 

The first couple of pallets were now stacked up on the ground next to Rick but Daryl could already feel the uncomfortable pull on his muscles with each pallet he pulled out. Apparently giving up on his current method of moving the pallets Daryl instead jumped up into the back of the van to push them out, finally catching a glimpse of you watching them from the farm. 

"Hi." He nodded his head in your direction, squinting his eyes against the sun as they lingered over you, realising that you weren't just watching them work you were staring at him with a certain intensity behind your eyes. For a moment it seemed like he was studying you.

"You boys need a hand there?" You offered as you cleared your throat and gestured towards the pallets, dropping your glove down into the dirt next to you, your original task long forgotten about already. You tried to mask your thoughts with an innocent smile in their direction but little did you know Daryl could already read you like an open book.

"Nah. All good 'ere." Daryl said with a shake of his head, making his hair fall down into his face. He turned his attention away from you again, saying something to Rick about getting Glenn to help with setting up the new protection on the walls but you couldn't shake the way he'd looked at you. You were a lost cause at this point, the inappropriate thoughts your mind was already supplying increased tenfold until they took over every other thought you had.

"I need a shower. Think I'm gonna turn in for the rest of the afternoon, I'm feelin' a little unwell. I'm sure it's just the heat, nothin' to worry about." You explained tripping over your words as you turned to Beth, quickly scrambling to your feet. You mumbled your thanks with a half-hearted wave in her direction, briefly aware of her well wishes as you made your way back towards the cell block but you'd already stopped listening. The only thing you could hear now was the thumping of your heart in your ears. It was more than likely just your imagination playing tricks on you but for a moment you could have sworn you felt Daryl's eyes following you as you retreated inside.

~~~

Your excuse to get out of helping on the farm wasn't entirely a lie, after being out there for hours you truly did need a shower. You started the stream of water and let out of sigh of relief as you stepped under it. You took your washcloth and scrubbed at the dirt that had settled in layers over your skin clinging to the sweat there. You hoped that the warm water running over your skin would calm your thoughts, washing your desperation down the drain with the dirt but unfortunately, it seemed to do just the opposite for you. It felt like your entire body was on edge, needing something, anything to quiet the feeling. You titled your head back, letting the warmth run over your skin as you finally let yourself give into one of the many fantasies you'd been harbouring recently.

Your mind wandered to the thought of what would happen if Daryl chose that exact moment to come inside from the heat, deciding that he needed a shower after the rough work of the supply run. Maybe he'd choose the same shower block as you, rounding the corner to see you with your back to him, standing naked under the stream of water as he took in the sight of your body. Your heart was picking up speed, threatening to beat out of your chest as your eyes closed letting you picture every detail of your fantasy perfectly.

You slowly ran your hand down your chest, groping at your breast as you imagined him stripping off to join you, his hands finding your waist the second he stepped under the water. The two of not sharing a word as he ran his fingers across your ribs, appreciating the feeling of your skin under his hands. You let out a content hum, so lost in the thought that you were practically able to feel the sensation of his lips on your neck, his body pressing against your back. Your hand moved lower, sliding across your stomach as you pretended it was his calloused fingertips touching you, the water pouring over you both as his hand glided lower and lower until he reached - 

You brought a hand up and quickly slammed off the water, letting out a harsh breath as you ripped yourself from your thoughts. It took you a second to regain your bearings before you stepped out of the shower and grabbed the towel you'd left out for yourself. You were willing to admit it wouldn't have been the first time you'd gotten off to the thought of Daryl but here wasn't the place for it. Privacy was just another thing on the ever-growing list of what you'd lost to the end of the world but the shower block was far too open for your liking. There was too much risk of someone other than Daryl actually walking in on you if you took too long and the thought made you shudder.

You quickly towelled yourself dry, leaving your hair still damp as you threw on the fresh clothes you'd gotten for yourself. You gathered up your old clothes that were now caked with dirt and dropped them into the laundry basket along with your towel to deal with later as you made your way back to your cell. The prison was more open plan than you'd like but at least here you had more privacy than anywhere else. There was a heavy blanket that you'd managed to scavenge pinned up over the bars that faced the main hall to provide you with a makeshift cover from the on-lookers in the prison.

The cellblock was quiet, everyone else still outside or in other parts of the prison working on their chores as you slipped inside your cell. The blanket fell back into place behind you and you carefully shifted it to cover any gaps you noticed, making it sure it would be impossible to see inside. Once you were done you kicked your shoes off to one side, collapsing back onto your bed with a heavy sigh. 

Your eyes fluttered shut as you tried to settle against the pillows, everything in your body itching for something more. It had been a long time since you'd been this frustrated. Since the fall of the world, you convinced yourself that sex was something that was just no longer a possibility for you but Daryl brought something primal out in you. No matter how much you tried to fight it when you were around him it felt like your entire body was on fire and every time you closed your eyes you could see him. This was one of those times where it simply was not going to go away by itself and you knew that. If you couldn't get a fix of the real thing you'd just have to take matters into your own hands.

The feeling of your clothes against your skin was becoming suffocating as you reached for the hem of your shirt, slipping it over your head. You let your fingertips run over the curve of your breasts before you undid your bra and dropped it off the bed to join your shirt, leaving you naked from the waist up. You took your time, letting yourself enjoy the feeling as you trailed featherlight touches up your stomach, the anticipation building until you finally reached your chest.

You cupped your breasts, groping at them while the palms of your hands rolled over your hardening nipples. The feeling made you arch your back into your touch, a soft groan falling from your lips. You repeated the movement, slowly working your body up to what you really needed as you felt the heat building between your legs. You toyed with your nipples, tracing around them in tight circles before pinching just enough for it to hurt. It wasn't enough you needed more and you needed it now, your thighs rubbing together as you searched for any kind of friction.

You dropped one hand down, fumbling with the button and zipper on your shorts to get them open. You didn't bother taking them off, instead slipping your hand under the waistband of your panties, running your middle finger through your folds to feel just how wet you were already. You were completely losing yourself to your thoughts now, trying to imagine how different it would feel if it was Daryl's hand shoved down the front of your panties instead of your own, drawing circles around your clit as he teased you.

You teased around your clit, letting the feeling flood through your body as you imagined the feeling of Daryl's rough hands against you pulling all the pleasure he wanted from your body, letting out a whimper at the thought. You slipped your hand downwards, finally slowly sliding two fingers inside yourself.

"Ah shit- Daryl-" You couldn't hold back the moan of Daryl's name that fell from your lips at the movement, your fingers easily pushing deep inside of you with how wet you already were. Your back arched off the bed as you set a steady pace, thrusting your fingers in rhyme with the circles your thumb was now tracing around your clit, drawing you closer and closer to the edge. All you could think about was how much better Daryl's fingers would feel inside you, how much thicker they would be as they stretched you out. You could feel that tension building in the pit of your stomach, threatening to snap if you continued the way you were, losing yourself in your fantasy.  

"Hey Y/N, heard ya callin' - shit I'm sorry didn't mean to - I um shoulda knocked." There was a second where you thought you were genuinely hearing things, so lost in the pleasure that you were actually starting to imagine Daryl's voice but the last rational part of yourself made your eyes snap open.

Daryl was standing by the entrance to your cell, frozen like a deer in headlights as he tried to figure out what exactly he was supposed to do in this situation, fumbling over any words he tried to get out of his mouth. He knew he should look away, give you your privacy and leave before this became even more awkward for either of you but his body was fighting him on it. He tried to leave but instead, his body stepped further into your cell, acting on instinct as he let the blanket fall back into place behind him. His eyes were trained on you, focused on the movement of your hand that hadn't stopped.

"Daryl I-" There was still a part of you that wanted to try and explain yourself to him but there was no explanation, no hiding what exactly you were doing. In the end, the other part of you won, the part of you that only had one thought on her mind. His name came out as more of a broken moan than you'd intended and you could see the hard-set look in his eyes at the sweet sound.

You couldn't help yourself, starting to thrust your fingers inside of yourself harder than before as you saw just how hard he was trying to hold himself back. You were testing his resolve, letting out gasps and pants as you waited to see how long it would take before he broke, finally giving in to what you both wanted. You'd come this far and you couldn't stop now. "Are you goin' to just stand there or are you goin' to help?"

Your words seemed to break Daryl out of his trance, finally answering his internal battle as his eyes snapped from your hand up to meet your gaze. You let out a broken moan, sinking your teeth into your bottom lip as your fingers brushed over your g-spot, holding eye contact with him the entire time.

"Nah." His voice was gravelly, already laced with lust as the look in his eyes turned to something darker, as if something inside of him shifted, something that spelt trouble for you. He was no longer frozen in place, instead walking over to your desk to pull out the chair, angling it in a way that would let him see all of you before he dropped down into it. He nodded his head towards your hand buried in your shorts and you could see the smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.  "Nah I ain't helpin' ya. Ya started this, ya can finished it too. Looks like ya were doin' just fine without me." 

"Fuck." You whined out realising what you'd just gotten yourself into. It only served to turn you on even more, the pool between your legs growing threatening to drip down your thighs as your thrusts picked up speed. It was driving you crazy to know Daryl was sitting only a few feet away watching you get yourself off to the thought of him. You should have felt embarrassed about being caught but you were too far beyond it. Your hips bucked up to meet your hand thrust for thrust, the feeling overwhelming you but still as good as it felt you needed more. You needed to feel Daryl. Needed his hand on you as he took over control and made you come in a way you never could make yourself. "I want you to touch me please."

"Yer lil' fantasy seemed to be servin' ya just fine before I walked in." He hummed leaning forward in his seat, resting his elbows on his knees as he watched every one of your movements closely. He dropped his hand to his lap, adjusting the growing buldge in his jeans as he shifted his legs apart. "Take off yer shorts. Panties too. Let me see ya." 

You clung to his every word, wanting to give him everything he asked for in hopes that it would get you what you wanted. You pushed your clothes down your legs with your free hand, not wanting to stop the feeling coursing through your veins for a second. Once they reached your ankles you kicked them off to the side, spreading your legs further apart. It gave your fingers more room to reach deeper inside of you and Daryl now had the perfect view as they slid in and out of you.

Part of you was still convinced this wasn't real, just some kind of fever dream you'd completely yourself to. You had waited so long for him to finally make a move, to finally show you he felt the same way about you and now here he was. You knew you wouldn't fully believe it until he touched you, until you could feel his hands on your heated skin and it didn't seem like he was giving you that any time soon.

"Look at ya, all spread out, lettin' me watch ya fuck yerself. Such a pretty pussy when yer all stretched out on yer fingers like that. Bet I could stretch ya better, is that what ya want huh?" His voice was low, almost a growl as he shifted forward, moving even closer to you like he couldn't help himself. Like there was an invisible force between the two of you pulling him closer and closer. He was staying quiet, still in control enough to make sure his words couldn't be heard if someone happened to walk by outside but there was something about the way he whispered, his voice rumbling rough and low that send a spark up your spine. "Bet that's what ya want. For me to come over there and fuck yer pussy good. Are yer fingers not good enough anymore darlin'?" 

"I want to feel you Daryl please." You pleaded, your voice sounding like a broken mess even to your own ears. Each gasp for air became a strangled moan or cry of his name as you drew closer to your orgasm. At this point you knew it wouldn't take much longer, you were starting to think you might be tipped over the edge by his words alone. Your hips rolled against your hand on each thrust as your back arched off the bed, your fingers hooking against your g-spot. You were racing towards your release, hoping that maybe once you got yourself off he would reward you and finally touch you, giving you everything you'd been dreaming of. "I'm gonna cum. I'm so close - I can't -"

"Stop." The seriousness in his voice caught you off guard as you let out a confused whimper. Why? Why would he make you stop now? You wanted to listen, to follow his instructions but you were too close to the edge, your body not letting you stop now no matter how much you wanted to behave for him. With every thrust of your fingers you could feel yourself drawing closer and closer to your orgasm until you could finally feel that tension starting to snap. You were seconds away from that release, from finally getting what you'd needed all day when Daryl surged forward, kicking the chair back as he grabbed at your wrist forcefully pulling your hand away. Pulling you away from your orgasm in the process.  "What ya can't take orders now woman? I said stop."

""What Daryl - why?" You cried out, your brain too clouded to form any cohernt thoughts as your voice cracked so badly that for a moment you thought you might actually cry. You tried to struggle against Daryl's grip on your wrist, writhing on the mattress as you tried to find any pressure you could pressing your thighs together but he was completely in control now. In a second he had both of your wrists caught in one hand, pinning them above your head so quickly you barely caught the movement. His free hand holding your thighs open, denying you the release you needed so badly. You knew there was no point in fighting, you were no match for Daryl's strength. "No, I need it, please - please let me -"

"Nah I don't think so. If ya wanna use the thought of me to get off then I get to choose when it happens. I heard ya, just before I came in 'ere, moanin' my name. Thought that was the sweetest damn sound I eva heard but hearin' ya beg like that just might beat it. Sweetheart if ya wanna cum tonight, ya better beg me for it." Daryl's breath was hot against the shell of your ear as he leaned over you, whispering in your ear. His grip tightened on your wrists as he proved his point, his hand on your thigh trailing upwards just enough to ignite every nerve ending in your body in a way you'd never felt before. "Let's find out how well ya can do what yer told." 

Without another word Daryl sunk to his knees next to your bed, finally releasing his grip on your wrists as his hand came down to grab at your other thigh, groping everywhere he could reach. He wrapped his arms around your thighs before pulling you to the edge of the bed until he could hook your legs over his shoulders, his head fitting perfectly between your thighs. He let out a low groan at the sight in front of him, your pussy already soaked, dripping down your thighs onto the sheets below you.

He couldn't help himself, not wasting a second longer before tasting you. He leaned in lapping his tongue over the apex of your thighs tasting the wetness that had gathered there while still avoiding where you needed him most. A rough groan sounded from his chest at the taste of you on his tongue as he finally dipped between your folds. Your body was already worked up, still hanging far too close to the edge to survive what you knew Daryl had planned for you. He was already eating you like a starved man and you knew he wasn't stopping until he was damn ready. 

You buried your fingers in his hair, scratching your nails over his scalp as his tongue lapped over your clit making you gasp out at the feeling. Already you were starting to lose control of your body, squirming his his tongue as he brought one hand up to press down on your stomach to stop you from bucking your hips into his face. There was something about how easily he held you down, taking control of the situation that turned you on more than you thought was possible.

"Daryl I - I can't take much more -" Your words were breathy, fighting against the fog that threatened to take over your mind to even form the words in your mind in a way that made sense. Everything was becoming too much, every sense overwhelmed while your body still screamed for more, never having enough of Daryl.  He grabbed at your thighs, spreading your legs further apart as they tried to close around his head while you pressed his head even closer to you. "Let me cum please - please I promise I'll do anything. It's too much."

"Ya can take more than this. I know ya can. Be a good girl and take it for me." Daryl's words rumbled against your skin, sending a wave of pleasure through you at the feeling. The praise and encouragement made you weak, whimpering out his name as your hands pulled at the hair at the nape of his neck. He licked his way back up to your clit before closing his lips around it, sucking roughly. 

The sudden feeling had you crying out louder than you'd intended, pressing a hand over your mouth to try and muffle the sound, not wanting the entire prison to know what exactly the two of you were up to. Daryl released his grip on one of your thighs, reaching his hand up to grasp at your arm instead, pulling your hand away from your mouth as you whimpered. "Don't cover yer mouth. I wanna hear ya beggin' me for it. Let everyone hear how much ya fuckin' want it. Let 'em know who's makin' ya feel this good."

"Fuck I need it so bad Daryl please. Need you." You were rambling now, the words falling from your lips faster than you could even process, and louder than you would normally let yourself be. Daryl's words were all the permission you needed to let yourself be beyond worrying about who heard you. In fact you didn't care about anyone other than Daryl anymore, the thought of getting off was the only thing on your mind.

As a reward for your pleas, Daryl slowly slid two fingers inside of you, the feeling better than anything you could have ever imagined. You moaned out his name as he stretched you out around his fingers, they were thicker than yours, the feeling beyond anything you could give yourself. Your hips bucked off the bed into his face as he curled his fingertips into your g-spot but he was beyond caring. At this point he was willing to let you suffocate him with your thighs.

"Please - oh god - please let me cum. Daryl please." You threw your head back against the pillows as the smallest fraction of dignity that you'd been holding onto melted away under his tongue. If he wanted you to beg for it you were going to beg, scream and cry for it. You weren't sure if you were even forming words anymore, every moan a cry of his name more desperate than the last hoping it would be enough for him to finally give you the permission you needed. "I'll be good - I'll be so good if you just let me -"

"C'mon then sweetheart, let me hear ya cum for me. Show me how much ya need me." That was all it took. Your whole body tensed as you finally let go, Daryl's name a broken cry on your lips. You could have sworn you almost blacked out for a moment from the intensity of your orgasm washing over you, going light-headed from the force. Daryl's hands stroked soothingly over your legs while they shook, slowly moving his mouth away from you when he realised it was becoming too much for you, helping your ride out the last of your high. "Fuckin' hell that was the best damn sight I ever seen. Bet ya never coulda cum like that by yerself hm? Need the real thing to show ya just how well I can treat this pussy." 

"Daryl I-" A breathy laugh was all you could manage as the afterglow seemed to take over every corner of your mind, stripping you of the ability to form any kind of coherent sentence. You closed your eyes, basking in the feeling as you tried to catch your breath that was still coming laboured after your orgasm. "Fuck."

"Yeah, darlin' I know." He hummed, gently running his fingertips up your thighs before slowly slipping them from his shoulders, lifting your legs back onto the bed to help you get more comfortable as you came down. You stretched out against the sheets, letting out a satisfied noise at the feeling of stretching out your already tired muscles. 

You heard the soft thud as Daryl's boots hit the ground, the bed dipping where he lay down next to you. You rolled over, lying half on his side as you buried your face into his shoulder your arms finding their way around his waist. Your hands played with the soft material of his shirt and it was at that moment that you realised he had just given you one of the best orgasms of your life without even taking off a single piece of clothing.

"I want to see you, Daryl, please. All of you." You whispered moving your hands to tug at the front of his shirt, your fingers already starting to undo the buttons there. Daryl chuckled at the frustrated noise you made in the back of your throat as you struggled with the buttons, pulling away from you as he took over removing his clothes. He decided to simply lift the shirt over his head instead and you could feel your breath hitch in your throat when you saw his chest.

All that heavy lifting around the prison as well as his years of training and work with his crossbow had certainly paid off. He was more than just well-built, your eyes hovering on his broad shoulders as each of his muscles was defined with every small movement. His skin was marked with more than his fair share of scars, the raised skin running all across his chest and back but there was something beautiful about them to you. A story that told of every way he'd survived. 

He threw his shirt to the side with your clothes and wasted no time before tugging off his belt, stepping back off the bed to make quick work of his zipper and button.  You could feel the heat rising in your cheeks, your arousal building between your legs again as you watched him pull down his pants and boxers in one swift movement. his erection finally being freed from the constricting material. 

"Ya wanna tell me what ya were thinkin' 'bout when ya were touchin' yerself? Yer dirty lil' fantasy 'bout me?" He asked in a teasing tone you rarely heard in his voice as he moved back onto the bed and settled between your legs. He planted one hand next to your head, balancing himself over you while his other hand wrapped around the base of his cock. He let out a low groan as he slowly pumped his hand along his length giving in to his need for any form of contact while he waited for your answer.

"Which one?" You said simply, trying to match his teasing attitude as you raised an eyebrow at him, watching his amused expression. After the position he'd caught you in there was no use hiding anything. You were past keeping secrets about your attraction towards him now. If he asked you to you'd tell him every detail of every thought you'd ever had about him. From the filthiest fantasies to the softest thoughts that even made you afraid of just how hard you might be falling. "The one just before you walked in where I was thinkin' about you with your hand down my pants and your fingers buried inside me? Or the one from earlier when I had to leave after watchin' you doin' all that heavy liftin' where I was imaginin' you takin' me from behind in the shower? Or maybe last week when all I could think about was you fuckin' me into the mattress until I couldn't breathe properly anymore?" 

"Christ woman ya really have a filthy mind hidden behind that pretty face doncha? Is that what yer thinking' 'bout every time I catch ya starin'? Thinkin' 'bout me bendin' ya over the closest surface huh?"Daryl littered hot, open-mouthed kisses across the flushed skin of your neck as he started to tease the tip of his cock through your folds. You let out a gasp at the feeling, wrapping a leg around his waist in an attempt to get him as close as you could. The change of position made him hit your clit, sending a shock wave of pleasure through your already sensitive nerves. He was teasing you, never giving you quite what you wanted. "Is that what ya want? Want me to fuck ya until yer so out of it my cock's all ya can think 'bout?"

"Yes, Daryl, please. Make me all yours, please. Show me who I belong to." You all but whined out, the desperate, needy tone to your voice enough to finally make Daryl act. Without warning, he lined himself up with your entrance and thrust into you in one motion. You cried out at the sudden feeling, your hands flying up to grab at his shoulders as you arched against him.

He set a steady but cruel pace as he started to move, his hands gripping your waist with a force that you were sure would leave a mark in the shape of his fingertips in the morning. He leaned in and buried his face in the crook of your neck as he growled out at the feeling of you clenching around him. His hips snapped against you hard enough to make you cry out with every thrust in the best way possible. You were already strung out on the feeling, your body having barely recovered from your previous orgasm as he quickly worked you towards another.

"Fuck darlin' ya feel s'good. Swear this pretty pussy was made for me. Gonna fuck ya better than any fantasy could make ya feel. Gonna fill ya up and make ya mine." Daryl was becoming just as desperate as you and you could hear it in his words, his thrusts getting that much sharper with every hit. He grabbed at the backs of your thighs and pushed your legs up, letting each stroke hit deeper inside you at this new angle making you feel full in a way you'd never experienced before. Your nails dug into the skin of his shoulders, leaving a trail of raised marks in the wake of your nails as you dragged them down his back, panting out slurred cries of his name.

His cock dragged across your g-spot on every thrust now, the feeling spiralling you into a completely new level of pleasure than before. You'd never had an experience like this before, never had someone fuck you so deep while stretching you out like this. He was right about what he said before, the only thought left in your mind now was the feeling of his cock inside you. It was all you cared about. He moved his hand between your bodies, reaching to draw circles around your clit as he continued to pound into you.

"Daryl can - oh god - please can I -" You couldn't even get the words out anymore, completely giving into his touch and everything he wanted. You were entirely at his mercy now and nothing had ever turned you on like this before. You weren't in control of your body anymore, every inch of you belonging to him now and you couldn't bring yourself to care.

"Let go. Let it all go for me, sweetheart. Wanna feel ya cummin' 'round my dick, give me everything you've got." The encouragement from Daryl was all it took to finally make that tension building inside of you snap as he swiped over your clit again. Your back arched into his chest as one arm wrapped around his shoulders, your other hand grasping at the back of his neck. You were clinging to his whole body, trying to find any way to ground yourself in the moment as your eyes rolled back into your head.

The feeling of your body spasming around him, holding him so tightly mixed with the intoxicating sounds of your desperate moans in his ear was enough to make him follow you over the edge. His movements were growing sloppy as he pushed himself as deep into you as he could with one final thrust. He growled low in his throat as he dropped his head to your shoulder, finally giving into the feeling and coming inside of you. "Fuck darlin' ya feel so fuckin' good. Never felt s'good before. Ya did s'good for me. Such a good girl for me." 

All you could manage was an exhausted sound of contentment as your hand absentmindedly combed through his now sweat-soaked hair. You couldn't find the energy to move much more than that, letting Daryl roll you both over so you were lying on top of his chest. You were completely exhausted now but you'd never left more alive than you did with Daryl. Every single second with him was worth the wait. You started to give into the feeling of his warm skin under you and the comforting feeling of his arms completely surrounding you, starting to drift off. You were too overstimulated to fight off the sleep your body so badly needed after that as your eyes fluttered shut. 

"S'beautiful sweetheart. Get some rest." Daryl's sweet words were the last thing you heard before you gave in to your exhaustion, his lips pressing a soft kiss to your temple as he held you close.

[cambion-companion]

Hi! I really loved your Raphael writing, so i got a lovely fic idea. Raphael x reader (platonic). Raphael discovered that reader is another cambion, even more surprising his daughter he had no idea existed. Have a good night/day😼

Hello, my dear! Thank you very much for the fic idea :) You're forcing me to exercise my self restraint I see. I will tweak this just a lil if you're wanting a reader who is Raph's daughter, she would be a Tiefling technically ;)

Let's see how he reacts.

OH and yes this about THAT Tiefling girl you see at the brothel in Act III.

little drabble ahead...

The Sharess' Caress.

A lovely den where the lonely and desperate wandered so willingly into Raphael's capable hands.

He considered himself more magnanimous than most devils, certainly better dressed.

His smile carefully shaped to exact the exact reaction from his potential clients, luring them into a false sense of security.

"Sign your name here, my friend." He said, making sure his voice held no sign of overbearance or eagerness.

The name was scrawled, a new deal was struck. Raphael was satisfied, bowing the latest of many gullible mortals out the door of his den.

He leaned against the doorframe, watching them go, smiling still; though this time he allowed a sinister edge to creep into his carefully crafted brown human eyes.

His ever-keen gaze drifted along the carpeted hallway, drawn to the movement of a gray-skinned Tiefling as she walked toward him, unaware of his presence.

As always, Raphael flicked his eyes over the creature, taking in every aspect of her that showed on the surface. Any sign of a weakness or vice he could potentially exploit.

Her orange eyes were fixed on the ground, a frown upon darkly painted lips.

She bore the obvious traits of a Tiefling descended from Mephistopheles. Interesting. Irony twisted Raphael's mouth in a wry grin as he considered just how she might be related to him.

Her horns gave him pause. Raphael's eyes narrowed. Regal horns, ridged and curving. A set of four, two smaller beneath the much larger pair. An exact mirror of his own.

"A moment." Raphael stepped out into the hallway, not directly blocking the girl's path, but garnering her immediate attention.

She halted, several paces away. Her tail swishing to and fro, a sign she may flee. "Yes?" Her voice wary. She had a modicum of intelligence at least.

Raphael didn't say anything for a moment, trying to gain a sense of how distant a relation to him this Tiefling was. "I noticed your beleaguered expression." He spoke, trying to ease her nerves. His voice just the right amount of soothing, as he'd practiced to perfection. "Perhaps I may be of assistance."

The Tiefling gave him a bemused look, pulling her chin in slightly. Raphael watched her closely, there was something about her that cried out in its familiarity.

Surely, she was not his direct descendent. Granddaughter or even daughter perhaps?

Yet if she was...what a delightful opportunity that would be.

"I don't think you'd offer me anything I haven't tried myself." She finally spoke, a lilting cadence that betrayed caution yet intrigue. "I doubt you could do what I cannot."

He almost laughed. "I assure you, there is very little I cannot do given the proper motivation." Raphael tilted his head and held out a hand, gesturing an invitation to the curious creature. "Come, if you're so self-assured what harm would you suffer from a little chat?"

Her amber eyes focused on his face for a moment, she seemed drawn to him as well. Curious.

With a twitch of her tail, the Tiefling shrugged and stepped with an air of self-confidence and a whiff of challenge into his den. Only Raphael's eyes moved as he watched her move.

Yes, perhaps she was closely related to him after all. He couldn't begin to name all the mistresses he'd taken to his bed over the centuries, it certainly was a possibility not to be readily dismissed.

And if she was his daughter...he would have her allegiance and her soul. Yet another faithful ally to bring more souls and more power to his Infernal doorstep.

[jawllines]

Olivia, hi! I hope you're doing good. I finally got time to read the new fic and I have few things to say. But first...

“Um, so recently I think I’ve been turned into a vampire.”  This is hilarious. Imagine one of friends saying that to you being all serious. Just out of the blue. Without giving any context at all, without feeding from you. I wouldn't know whether to be terrified or concerned or just laugh. But I laughed way too hard reading this.

Also Harry needs to adopt that bunny, it felt like a metaphor of his childhood scars he was guessing what might have caused the scar on that bunny's ear. They belong together.

Anyway, I think this Harry is your best character. You have so much room and so many ways that you can build his character further. You have done a great job I think but this character needs more exploring. What we've seen so far is just surface level me thinks. I'd say the same about Y/N's character but I kinda like focusing more on Harry's in this one. I'm also intrigued by Felix. Most importantly though I just think this Harry is precious and adorable and lovely and deserves all the warmth in the world. And HE NEEDS TO RECIEVE A PROPER HUG OUT OF AFFECTION AND NOT JUST BECAUSE SOMEONE NEEDS TO FEED OFF OF HIM. I just wanna invite him to my house, wrap him in a blanket, make him tea, turn on the tv and cuddle him and run my fingers through his hair and tell him that he's not alone. Because fuck did I relate to him. I have never related to any character like this before and it has nothing to do with childhood trauma. I haven't been born into a cult or anything like that thankfully but I do come from a background where people are not very affectionate with each other. And I have realised that I'm quite touchy-feely kind of person. I'm like this with the few friends I have and some cousins that I'm kind of close with but they don't return it. So I feel touch starved too in a way. I crave human connection and affection and I'm awkward as fuck so I see myself in Harry here. I just felt this overwhelming desire all the while I was reading it, to protect him and tell him that it's gonna be okay. Poor guy feels touch and warmth for the first time and it's by a vampire and he's okay with it despite the danger because he has never felt anything like that before and he probably hadn't expected anything like that to happen to him ever so he's gonna take whatever he gets. And I'm left thinking what if Y/N wasn't as good as she is, what if she did actually hurt him. I'm so sad for my him. He deserves so much love.

You have done so amazing with this story and I know you might not feel very motivated to write the next part because I understand that you aren't getting the response you expected perhaps. But I meant when I said your writing is warm blanket in cold night. Because it is and some of us need that believe it or not. We need that blanket from you and you alone. Because it's not just about the story or plot, it's about you too. The way you write and build your characters and the worlds, the way you portray the connections and dynamics between your characters, the way you convey what they are feeling....all of it is just so comforting. There's a reason I come back to your stories after reading or watching something that's not particularly easy on the heart or when I'm having a tough time or a shittier day than usual. Your stories fill me with so much happiness joy comfort I can't even explain. And I can guarantee there are hundreds of other readers who feel the same. So even though this is very selfish and probably kind of rude to you (because you have every right to be disappointed as a writer when you don't get your desired results) but I'm gonna go ahead and say please write the next part for me and those hundred others. Because we think you're great and we love you and everything you write. Even though we might love some of your stories with more intensity than others but it's literally impossible to not love them all.

That's all I gotta say. I hope I didn't cross any lines though. I didn't mean to hurt you and if I did I'm sorry. And I love you 💕

THIS.. .. .MADE ME TEAR UP FORREAL IVE HAD SUCH A HARD DAY AND READING ALL OF THIS LIKE MAKES MY HEART SO HAPPY

IM REALLY REALLY HAPPY THAT YOU LIKE HARRY AS A CHARACTER AND RELATE TO HIM!! IT'S HARD BEING A TOUCHY-FEELY PERSON NOT SURROUNDED BY TOUCHY FEELY PEOPLE, ESPECIALLY BC THEY DONT UNDERSTAND THE LIKE -- ITCH YOU GET TO JUST BE CLOSE TO SOMEONE PHYSICALLY BUT I WANTED TO FOCUS NOT ON HARRY BEING SURROUNDED BY NON-TOUCHY-FEELY PEOPLE, BUT NOT EVEN HAVING THE OPTION OF A CUDDLE EVEN IF IT WAS SOMEONE WHO WASN'T PARTICULARLY INTO CUDDLING!! LIKE I FEEL LIKE HIS MOM AND SISTER WERE HUGGERS BUT HE'S AWAY FROM HOME AND PROBABLY MISSING IT!!

I WOULD LIKE TO DIG DEEPER INTO HIS CHARACTER, SO IF YOU'RE INTERESTED I WILL :D AND WE'LL MAKE SURE TO WRAP HIM UP IN A NICE TOASTY BLANKET AND PLAY WITH HIS HAIR, AND HUG HIM

ALSO THE WHOLE LAST PARAGRAPH -- I LOVE YOU A LOT!! IM SORRY I GET ALL MOPEY SOMETIMES LIKE EVERYONE HATES IT, IM SO SO SO THANKFUL FOR EVERYONE WHO DOES LIKE IT!!! SOMETIMES I JUST NEED TO BE REASSURED THAT YOU REALLY DO ENJOY IT, AND MESSAGES LIKE THIS HELP A FUCK TON!!! I LOVE THAT PEOPLE CAN FEEL WARM AND HAPPY FROM MY WRITING, IT MAKES ME FEEL EXTRA WARM AND HAPPY MYSELF

SO THANK YOU, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!!

[johnslittlespoon]

Omg the new tas chapter was amazing!!! Im lit so obsessed its so well written ughhhh

Also i was just wondering if u are considering continuing the “you’re a dog im your man” fic? Absolutely NO PRESSURE AT ALL and i read and love everything write so i hope this doesn’t come across as demanding. I was just wondering cause i was rereading that fic today haha. Anyways hope u have a great day ❤️❤️

HI okay! first of all thank you SOOO so much omg :')) <3 i promise it doesn't come across as demanding at alllll, i really am so grateful for how chill 99% of anons have been in my inbox 😭💗 and i hope you have a great day too!!

this might be a little long–winded bc i don't think i've made a proper post about this (i might've and just forgot lol my bad), but you're a dog (i'm your man) has not been abandoned, i promise!! <3

i know it's been stupid long since the last chapter, like four–ish months atp? at first i just got very swept up in tough and sweet (clearly lol), but then when i sat down to start yadiym chapter seven, i just could Not get something i was happy with. it's not even writer's block, because i know exactly what is going to happen in every chapter, can see it play it out in my head like a movie and all, but everything i put down on the page just wasn't doing the vision i had in my head justice. :/

i think i've rewritten and scrapped ch7 three or four times now lol and it sucksss. i care so so much about this fic, it's really what got me to fall back in love with writing and it means a lot to me, so it makes me even more picky about making it as good as it can possibly be. my tentative goal is to put out a new chapter before the new year... december is gonna be pretty busy hence the 'tentative,' but i'd be really really happy if i could get something into a doc that i'm happy with by then. :')

chapter seven is currently a completely blank doc and i haven't touched it since the last scrap lol, but i've been pouring over the whole drafting doc the past month to get my brain back into dog coded mode and i do feel hopeful that this next attempt will be something i feel better about <3 who knows, maybe i will be able to hop on here on christmas and be like 🤲🏻 merry christmas here's ch7 🤲🏻

that's the dream anyway :-) again gotta say thank u to anyone who's still stayed interested in this story and has been so very patient and chill with me, i'm so thankful and it really is motivating/kicking my ass into gear to know that anyone's actually still waiting for an update!! insane to meeee <333

[angeart]

I only recently found ur tumblr account but i’ve been reading ur fics (I enjoy them a lot!) and honestly it’s making me itch to write. Which i’ve done before but i’ve never committed to a proper fic, so like, any tips maybe? I’ve got Ideas but hell if I know how to execute them

hi hello! happy to hear you're enjoying the fics and aww!! oh gosh. that's so sweet that my writing is making u want to write 🥺

when i started writing hmtb, i had zero expectations, wasn't sure where the story was going to go, had just a vague simple concept i thought would be fun to play with... i haven't written anything in years. i also just got the Itch™️ after reading a good fanfic.

...and then suddely i just found myself writing. (and here we are)

it's a great feeling, and i think you should follow it if u can!! :3

i'm not quite sure what advice you're seeking out here exactly. is there something specific you're struggling with? i'm going to try to list and address some things under the cut, but if whatever you were looking for is missing, feel free to ask about it!

if it's commitment you struggle with, you can always start smaller. you can try to dabble in drabbles, see how the characters and the story setting feel like and get more comfortable with them (and in a way, more curious and inspired about them!).

you can do shorter bits or oneshots—like how i have an au around sleep demon grian, but only have one oneshot fic set in it. it gets you test things out without getting overwhelmed about having to have a Big Story, and then if you decide you want to do more, you can arrange them into a series and link them thematically that way into one cohesive story anyway! (the way i do with boatem circus.)

or you can use prompts to center your works around. which, speaking of, the boatem circus' oneshot was all spawned from a thought "what if panic attacks". bayum.

honestly, i'm not best at organisation and just wing things a lot. but i do recommend you to note down ideas at each opportunity. whether it's just a concept, a dialogue, a snippet, an atmosphere, a scene you might like to play around with at some point, or a whole ass Big Rambly Thought. save it somewhere! save it all!

you can even write down what you need to figure out next. what are the points of the story you need to Think About Some More so that you can move forward? jot down the questions, too, so that you know what to focus on next time you want to brainstorm stuff.

if you're writing a longer thing, i also recommend to note down details you need to keep track of that might otherwise get swallowed up and forgotten as the focus moves elsewhere. (for example, i have a note saying scar was given a feather, and the clothes they're wearing as they're swapped/unusual. i have a note that says that hmtb scar still has flowers from grian's collapse in the field in his inventory—)

but. that all being said. the most important thing is to have fun with what you're doing and to be interested in your own story and the characters in it. i think that's really the key to it. you need to tell the story you want to see. it's gonna be for you, first and foremost, and that's important to be aware of.

which means... be self indulgent!! it's your story! go wild! do what you want!! <333

as for motivation, staying on track, and staying engaged with your story... if you can get someone to ramble at and bounce ideas off of and show writing progress to, that can be a great help! it's even great for fleshing out stories/developing things further/getting new ideas. (a lot of hmtb plotpoints were born in private DMs just because we were throwing "what if" and "imagine this" around!)

at the end of it all... it really just boils down to: start writing.

don't overthink it. open a page, and set the characters free on it.

here's a great thing: it doesn't have to be perfect.

write it anyway.

you can consider it a draft, and then you can read over it and see if you want to edit it in any way. you can have wips around. that's fine! the important part is to start <3

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as a bonus here's some example chaos of my various notes. i have all kinds of things saved, this is kind of just an example of how it can look:

[crusherthedoctor]

Eggman's design in Stellar

As you may know by now, Eggman looks a little different as described in Sonic Stellar. His design and anatomy are the same Modern Eggman we all know and love or pretend to love, in the case of those that deliberately misrepresent his character, but he's got a new outfit. Naturally I made sure to describe it in the fic proper, because it'd be weird if I didn't, but I wanted to go a little more in-depth here to give some insight on the thought process behind it. This won't take too long, since it's honestly not that complicated.

So what motivated this? Well, it was actually a late addition. Originally, as was the case in BtS, he was in his regular Modern attire, and even when I began to brainstorm it into existence, I hesitated on it for the longest time because I was concerned as to whether it'd be seen as leaving a piss mark on SEGA's design out of the arrogant belief that it needs to be improved... like what those in charge of certain adaptations tend to do with the characters and universe in general. However, after remembering that there is precedence for one-off shifts in the games proper - see Rouge in Heroes, or Sonic's soap shoes in SA2 - I considered it fair game.

That said, don't assume it's a change for the sake of change: there's a plot reason for it. Since Eggman is attempting to convince the locals of Viridonia (aside from Trudy) that he's a changed man, he switches his appearance to symbolize this... but since he can't help himself, he still has to stylize it so that it's as him as possible.

Now it's time to talk about the actual look. The basic gist is simple enough. Just a nice debonair suit, like this for example:

...but in the distinctive Rrrrrobotnik style, and with the waistcoat unbuttoned, because this man does not operate like most gentlemen. I tried to balance out the doctor's usual colour scheme for it, so you have black for the shirt and pants, red for the waistcoat, yellow for the golden lining within said waistcoat, and white for the shoes (with black tips, like Swanky here), as well as the gauntlets (see below). The Modern jacket may not be present, but I paid tribute to it in spirit.

Instead of having those goggles on his head that he only uses during leap years, I transferred anything they could do to his glasses, reminiscent of how they worked in '06. Yes, there was some '06 inspiration among all this. That's how you know the doctor is officially off his gourd by the time of Stellar.

Of course, the most striking aspect of his new attire are his aforementioned gauntlets, complete with a selection of nifty abilities that allow him to be even more hands-on than he already was... and some clawed tips, cause he felt like it. This was inspired by his control glove in the movies, as I figured that by this point in Game Eggman's career, after all that he's had to put up with, it was a logical next step for such an infamous control freak. Plus, I just think it's neat for him. :D Note that they're not cluttered compared to the rest of his design, they'd have a simplistic look despite some buttons and the like.

Why did I make them gauntlets, instead of just gloves like normal? I found an appeal in how they contrast with the rest of his otherwise low-key dress sense (for his standards). It felt like the sort of thing he would do, as an extra way of commanding your attention. And yes, I'm aware that some readers might assume he has actual robotic hands now, and declare it a brilliant SatAM JoJoke, but I hope repeated use of the word gauntlet should clarify that's not the case... >_>

Fun Fact: Originally, he was only going to have only one gauntlet, for a little bit of asymmetry. However, I realised that Starline already has a similar thing going on, and since I brought him into the story, it might be redundant. So Eggman has them for both hands. Think of it as his unspoken way of one-upping his #1 simp.