#michael…did we forget about her???? i’m SICK!!!!!!

[johndonneswife]

why do they keep doing this to my blorbo 😢

[zalrb]

“You said you didn’t know why you came here, you were just here, but what am I supposed to do with that, Elena? What are you doing?” 

She continued toward him. “Fighting for you.” 

Stefan closed his eyes. “Well, don’t.” It’s only getting you hurt. I can’t stand it.

THE FACT THAT HE STILL CARES SO DEEPLY

“Maybe that’s not what I’m looking for right now.” 

Elena cocked her head, bewildered. “I can’t even fathom that.”

“I never remember asking you to try,” said Stefan calmly. 

LMFAO

and like... really elena? how can you not comprehend that YOUR decisions led to this situation???

“You know this is bad for you,” she said.      

“Elena, I’m not looking for your approval.” 

L M F A O STEFAN IS KILLING ME

She wasn’t listening. She pointed toward the apartment building. “You know she is bad for you.”

Of course he knew that. “Can’t you just stop?” 

“No,” she said.

It was Stefan’s turn to be surprised, his expression a mixture of exasperation and desperation. “This has nothing to do with you.” 

“I don’t care.” 

even though shes refusing to stay in her lane, im kinda impressed with elena

“Giving up is not what we do, Stefan. We don’t stop,” said Elena, holding his gaze so he could understand how serious she was. “I didn’t stop when you went off the deep end with Klaus. You didn’t stop when Jeremy died.” 

“I haven’t lost my humanity.” 

Elena snorted. “No, just your mind.” 

LAUGHING OUT LOUD! ELENA PULLED A MICHAEL SCOTT

“Don’t defend her!” 

“Why shouldn’t I?” he yelled back, words rushing out before he could stop himself. “After all the energy we spend defending Damon, holding up the lie that being with you has reigned him in, the fantasy we’ve constructed for ourselves just so we could all feel better about your choice? 

E X A C T L Y

“What do you want to hear, Elena?” He was shouting. “You want to hear that it makes me sick? Well it does! But the rush I get? I can’t ---” He took a deep breath. “I can’t stop! Is this what you mean? This is what you want to hear?” 

His words shattered her but Elena wouldn’t back down. “It’s only fair isn’t it? You had to hear what I felt about Damon even though it was against my will. It’s your turn.”

elena:

“I’m not hurting you because you hurt me.” 

UGH. stefans initial instincts, his nature:

stefan's the most honorable male character i know, his compassion knows no bounds

“I am demanding that we talk about it!”

ELENA WYD

“Fine, let’s talk about it! Let’s talk about how good the sex is, that I’ve had her every which way for hours on end and it’s still, somehow, not enough!  Let’s talk about how it feels like I’m addicted to her, like I’m hooked on the high I get when I’m around her! Let’s talk about how right now, I can’t see an end in sight! You really want to talk about that? You really want to hear that? Really? Do you want me to go on?”

this fucking hurt, but i get it... stefan just couldn't take it anymore

“Maybe that’s not what I’m looking for right now.” 

Elena cocked her head, bewildered. “I can’t even fathom that.”

“I never remember asking you to try,” said Stefan calmly. 

LMFAO

LMAO very much 4x11 Stefan

Of course he knew that. “Can’t you just stop?” 

“No,” she said.

It was Stefan’s turn to be surprised, his expression a mixture of exasperation and desperation. “This has nothing to do with you.” 

“I don’t care.” 

even though shes refusing to stay in her lane, im kinda impressed with elena

And I actually think that's very much what they're like in canon where Stefan is like OK well this is not your responsibility or this has nothing to do with you or 'll figure it out on my own or I'm letting you go

and Elena is basically like, the fuck you will, we are a PACKAGE DEAL or did you forget??

and it's really fun to write that in this situation where he's like will you PLEASE just mind your business and she's like

because what she's doing is this

combined with extreme jealousy and we've already covered how crazy Elena acts when jealous about Stefan.

“I am demanding that we talk about it!”

ELENA WYD

“Fine, let’s talk about it! Let’s talk about how good the sex is, that I’ve had her every which way for hours on end and it’s still, somehow, not enough! Let’s talk about how it feels like I’m addicted to her, like I’m hooked on the high I get when I’m around her! Let’s talk about how right now, I can’t see an end in sight! You really want to talk about that? You really want to hear that? Really? Do you want me to go on?”

and for here I was basically like, in Elena's mind they're never going to get anywhere, they're never going to get past this unless he's honest, unless he's telling her things he doesn't want to tell her, letting her see things he doesn't want her to see, it's basically another version of this

[jadelotusflower]

Stargate rewatch: 1x14 Singularity

lol, we just love to go to other planets and putting up signs announcing our presence.

Daniel sneezes! So we haven’t forgotten his allergies entirely.

Throughout the show, each member of SG-1 will get at least one Emotional Support Child. This is Sam’s.

However Teal’c is the first contact with Cassandra as he’s sans hazmat suit - I love how gentle he is with her. We only got a glimpse of him with Rya’c in a tense situation, this gives us a better idea of what he’s like as a father.

We know from Cold Lazarus that Sam is an Aunt, and she does have a sweet Auntie vibe in the scenes with Casandra which becomes more maternal as the episode progresses.

I think this is the first time the element the Stargate is made from is identified as naquadah.

Daniel isn’t wearing his glasses in the briefing - I wonder if Michael Shanks got sick of wearing them all the time or the director didn’t want to bother trying to avoid the lights reflecting in them. Perhaps both.

This time it was Mario Azzopardi, who also directed the pilot and several other season 1 episodes.

Not an issue here, since the reflection comes from an onscreen light source.

I do love these kind of shots!

Oh hey, head of surgery Dr Warner is back, nice continuity.

Daniel also had a coffee cup - I don’t know if this is the first one in a while or if I’ve just been forgetting to look.

It’s another episode on the heels of Hathor where Sam is The Girl, but much more successful as there’s actually some character work going on.

Daniel outside reading a book waiting for Sam is very sweet, but he uses a piece of paper to mark his place instead of a bookmark like an absolute savage.

Sam: “I just - I want to do this” Daniel: “Okay. But I guess what I’m saying is that you don’t have to do this alone.” Their friendship!

The first season is full of randos in the briefing room.

Our first mention of Nirrti, although identified as male by Teal’c - whether he was wrong or at one point Nirrti had a male host is undetermined.

Nirrta is a Hindu deity that is either male or female depending on the scripture. The name is derived from the Sanskrit Nirrti which means decay, and is probably why they were chosen for this episode.

Sam feeling she needs to be detached because of her military training 🥺

What was that post about traditional tv framing having everyone stand unrealistically close to fit into smaller screens? Exhibit A right here.

“In fact the decision is quite easy - the consequences are what’s difficult.” Great Hammond line.

Gut wrenching performance by Amanda Tapping. Also Katie Stuart as Cassandra - she knows exactly what’s happening when Sam leaves her in the bunker, red tag of death still attached to her clothes.

Sam guesses that the bomb isn’t going to go off, but ultimately she goes back down because she made a promise to Casandra not to leave her, and couldn’t live with herself if she broke it.

In Thor's Hammer, Daniel asked Sam if she'd ever had a feeling that made no logical sense but turned out to be right - this isn't quite that since Sam did have a reason to believe the bomb wouldn't go off, but this the start of Sam starting to trust her instinct and made big logical leaps that inexplicably pay off.

This will get her into trouble later on as risks don’t always pay off, but will also allow her to make incredible achievements and snap victory from the jaws of defeat more than once.

Compare Sam in CotG, skeptical of Daniel's claim that the Stargate was part of a network because they’d run permutations with no result, to here where she has an idea but trusts her gut that it’s right, not necessarily the evidence.

Cassandra’s cover story about being from Toronto is funny seeing as the Stargate universe is basically Space Canada.

My last three brain cells.

[windudemon]

rock ballads as personality types

is this love by whitesnake : IXTP (unsure of own feelings and reaches to the conclusion that he is in love by logic this would also apply to EXTJs reason because all these types share having ethics functions at the bottom)

is this love that i’m feeling is this the love that i’ve been searching for is this love or am i dreaming this must be love cause it’s really got a hold on me

november rain by guns n’ roses : ESTP (brutally logical and spitting facts. could also apply to entp)

nothin’ lasts forever and we both know hearts can change and it’s hard to hold a candle In the cold november rain (…) love is always coming, love is always going no one’s really sure who’s lettin’ go today walking away

when a man loves a woman by michael bolton: ESFJ (simppppppppppp)

when a man loves a woman spend his very last dime and trying to hold on to what he needs he’d give up all his comforts and sleep out in the rain if she said that’s the way, it ought to be

I’d Do Anything for Love (But I Won’t Do That) by meat loaf: ENFP (ne dom, fi creative (especially for the twist at the end)

Will you raise me up? Will you help me down? Will you get me right out of this godforsaken town? Can you make it all a little less cold?

I can do that I can do that

Will you hold me sacred? Will you hold me tight? Can you colourise my life, I'm so sick of black and white? Can you make it all a little less old?

I can do that Oh I can do that

Will you make me some magic with your own two hands? Can you build an emerald city with these grains of sand? Can you give me something I can take home?

I can do that I can do that

Will you cater to every fantasy I got? Will you hose me down with holy water, if I get too hot? Will you take me places I've never known?

I can do that Oh, I can do that

After a while you'll forget everything It was a brief interlude and a midsummer night's fling And you'll see that it's time to move on No, I won't do that I won't do that

where the wild roses grow by nick cave & the bad seeds ft. kylie minogue: IxTJ (who the fuck else can even imagine to write a song like this? dark and "fe blindspot" for sure.)

on the third day he took me to the river he showed me the roses and we kissed and the last thing I heard was a muttered word as he knelt above me with a rock in his fist

on the last day I took her where the wild roses grow and she lay on the bank, the wind light as a thief and i kissed her goodbye, said, “all beauty must die” and i lent down and planted a rose ‘tween her teeth

winds of change by scorpions: INFJ (obviously, this song is about times changing (ni) and people (fe))

Listening to the wind of change The world is closing in Did you ever think That we could be so close, like brothers

The future's in the air Can feel it everywhere Blowing with the wind of change

Take me to the magic of the moment On a glory night Where the children of tomorrow dream away In the wind of change

tallulah by sonata artica: ixfj (this one particularly fe creative. the fe usage here is very effective because fe creative is supported by fi demonstrative)

Remember when we used to look how sun set far away, And how you said "this is never over", I believed your every word and I quess you did too, But now you're saying "hey, let's think this over".

You take my hand and pull me next to you, so close to you, I have a feeling you don't have the words, I found one for you, kiss your cheak, say bye, and walk away Don't look back cause I am crying.

I remember little things, you hardly ever do, Tell me why, I don't know why it's over, I remember shooting stars, the walk we took that night, I hope your wish came true, mine betrayed me.

You let my hand go and you fake a smile for me, I have a feeling you don't know what to do, I look deep in your eyes, hesitate a while, Why are you crying.

i don’t want to miss a thing by aerosmith: esfp (being “se” in the moment and enjoying that special, specific feeling towards a person obsessively)

don’t want to close my eyes i don’t want to fall asleep 'dause i’d miss you baby and i don’t want to miss a thing 'cause even when i dream of you the sweetest dream will never do i’d still miss you baby and i don’t want to miss a thing

bed of roses by bon jovi: ENFJ (theatrical and dramatic and over the top romantic) i’ll just close my eyes and whisper “baby, blind love is true” i want to lay you down in a bed of roses for tonight i’ll sleep on a bed of nails oh I want to be just as close as the holy ghost is and lay you down on a bed of roses

painted on my heart by the cult : ISFP!!! (fi deep and se sensory)

I've still got your face Painted on my heard Carved upon my soul Etched upon my memory . . .baby

And I've got your kiss Still Burning on my lips The touch of her fingertips Is left so deep inside of me . . .baby

just like heaven by the cure: INFP but also ENFP (ne playful, fi emotionally involved and alive)

"Show me, show me, show me how you do that trick? The one that makes me scream." she said "The one that makes me laugh." she said And threw her arms around my neck "Show me how you do it, And I promise you, I promise that I'll run away with you, I'll run away with you."

[self-loathing-angel-of-thursday2]

Beautiful Spouse Rewatches SPN 05x01

Sympathy for the Devil

“I wish The Winchesters had the camp like OG supernatural” “You can note that today is Dean’s birthday, too” “what the fuck?”

“I’m asking you guys” “terrorist nuns. That’s frightening” “That’s a bloody fkn toaster” “Isn’t this guy GOD, and he hits you with a rubber end of a plunger?” “delicious. Was it alphabet soup or chicken noodle soup?” “That was one sick burn - cram it with walnuts ugly? - look at his fucking face. Do you see Zach’s little smile?” “Zach is like oh shit I didn’t offend him enough”

“CRAM IT WITH WALNUTS UGLY - that’s hilarious” “There’s no hand pattern with blood on the door but his hand was bloody” “We’re sucking the walnuts right out of the angels’ ass. That’s what we’re doing today” “you don’t want to know dean” “They’re going extra with the language in this episode” “Oddly plush carpet for a motel and you can hear his shoes on tile but there’s dirty carpet in another corner” “Easy” “Oh it’s her” “Are they making fun of the Samgirls?” No they’re making fun of the wincesties

“Web mistress?” “I love how incredibly lame this could have gone, but it actually works” “Is that Chicago?” “I always forget this was filmed in Canada” Sam getting rejected by both his father figures

“I don’t think I saw that coming last time either” “Makes sense after he shat all over Sam. I suspected something but just figured Bobby changed his mind about Sam” Looking up Rachel Miner filmography because Spouse doesn’t remember seeing her elsewhere - it was Californication 

“Might need your penis for later. Careful where you cut” “Didn’t he kill his woman or something? Or did they die from something else?” “and that’s when you realize you’ve completely lost it” “Dean really likes playing with his piece” I have a joke to tell Spouse later about the Michael sword actually being a Michael Sheath lol

“I’m confused?” “that was funny as fuck” “See? He’s a wad and a receptacle. Even Dean put it together” twirls hair hi cas

“Sky Daddy is angry”

Cas literally branded Dean with a handprint then branded both of them with rib sigils lol 🎶I wanna feel you from the inside🎶

“I don’t mind this guy so much” “So Lucifer just didn’t say anything about promises?” “with balls”

“Oh wait he doesn’t know never mind” “That’s funnier than fuck” - the GED and give em hell attitude

“Is that what you put on your job application?” “When did Dean get his GED? Do we know?” NO, but we the girlies know he did it all alone while Sam was at Stanford and in-between hunts

[truearchangel]

"Admittedly I did forget about her, but now that you mention it the moment we met she immediately threatened me with an angelic spear for simply speaking. Granted she was masquerading as one of US at the time, but she smelled a bit off from the get-go. Actually, thinking about it, Lucifer was aggressive from the start as well, but that was absolutely my doing. I needed to know how serious he was about stepping up and helping his daughter, after all. My good deed for the year."

He rather pointedly avoided responding directly to his whereabouts during Exterminations; he wasn't a fool, he was aware of his limitations. That didn't mean everyone else needed to know as well.

"I've functioned as a Crossroads demon for nearly a hundred years. I don't need to actively seek out contracts for souls. They summon me, they ask for me directly. All I do is give them what they want, let them ruin their own lives, and then collect. Very few of my contracts were actually FORMED in Hell with the Sinners directly. The souls I have collected in Hell, well...they certainly didn't end up under contract."

@diistortion

Is he... actively giving him information? About himself?

   Is he sick? Is he confused? Pulling information from Alastor, personal information, was not easy. Michael was fairly certain he would spend a good portion of his time down here attempting to decipher the Radio Demon as well as the hotel itself. He was fully invested in that too, he had actually created an entire notebook specific to the things he noticed about Alastor and the questions he had surrounding him, as well as facts he had gotten. It wasn’t much, he was only a few pages in it, but he had information. None of it was as direct as this though, just given to him so willingly.

    He has figured out on his own that Alastor likes being an enigma. He claims he doesn’t wish to be understood but rather perceived. Everyone just aware of his presence, not understanding of it. Which was a note in his notebook and confusing at the same time. 

   Having him so willingly give out details of himself, of his life is–baffling? It feels baffling. Mostly he’s concerned that Alastor wasn’t feeling well. Would he just give him information like that on a normal day? Was he trying to read something from Michael by saying things like that and seeing how he would react? What would be the gain from this here? Everything that comes from him has to be some form of a manipulation tactic, Michael is certain of it. But why? 

   Maybe there really was something wrong with him today. He was far too invested in this conversation, in trying to break Michael apart or something and now he was giving out personal information about himself. It’s just too weird. “Hey, I’m going to touch you.” He has exactly two seconds to process those words and flee with his weird magic before Michael actually makes the movement to do it. And he counts them in his head. 

   When the second was up, he reached his hand up to feel the demon’s forehead. "Are you feeing alright?"

[icarus-does-fall]

Chapter Six

Sibling drama, the start of the poor bois trauma , he'll get back to his notta-boyfriend boyfriend eventually I promise

The beginning of the End

As Michael made his way back to the cathedral his thoughts lingered constantly on Kain and the time they spent together. He wasn't sure how to feel about Kain, about what he was feeling in general. Kain made him feel things, made him think things- acknowledge things that weren’t permitted. With a soft sigh and a heart still aflutter Michael pushed his way through the cathedral doors.

“Michael!” An overly excited voice shouted as he walked through the doors, the sun had just set by the time he had arrived back.

“Michael where have you been? Are you okay, did something happen? Me and the father have been worried sick over your sudden disappearance! Not to mention you had clerical duties you were supposed to attend to today- They made Joshua fill in for you, he's still in training Michael. We have responsibilities brother.”

Michael was barely given a moment to gather his surroundings before his sister bombarded him, which he should have expected. The two were almost never apart and Michael going off without notice was almost unheard of. With a soft sigh he replied, “Yes Mary I’m back, I would always return to you, we’re the last of our family. Nothing happened, I simply went out. I- I apologise for abandoning my post here at the cathedral.”

Mary shook her head and then pulled her brother in for a tight hug, her tail was wagging behind her still from his return. “It's no matter to me, not anymore really, however you will need to take it up with Father Kier. But he's such a sweetheart, I'm sure he’ll be just as understanding as I, as long as you're honest with him! Remember brother Father Keir saved us, we owe him our honesty and our lives.”

Michael, he tensed ever so slightly as Kier was mentioned. Keir Craven, the dragonborn that saved the twins after their parents' untimely demise. He was… a double edged sword in terms of a saving grace. For Mary he was a bringer of light, a new beginning. Yet for Michael he was the start of a tortuous and horror filled childhood.

“Mary-” He shook his head as he cut his sentence short and then pulled Mary in for another hug. “Nevermind it. I shall do my best, let us hope Father Keir is just as forgiving as you believe him to be, yes?”

Mary grinned with a laugh as she pulled away from the hug, looping her arm through Michaels. “Oh please brother, Father Keir has been nothing but kind to us since he took us in as children, you overthink things too much, one of the many reasons you're always in trouble. Now for the love of the great ones, tell me where you went.”

“I simply went out and lost track of time, I don't get out much anymore since it is to be believed I cannot interact with possible parishioners so I merely wanted to enjoy time in the city. Really Mary, there is nothing to worry about I promise. I was well behaved.”

Mary sighed and gave Michael a doubtful look. “Michael, last time you went into the town you got into a fight- Someone bit you for heaven's sake, and! You're not even wearing the expected attire, you went into the public dressed down? Brother, there's rules we have to follow for living in the cathedral. It's not that I don't trust you- I do! You're my brother, I would never truly doubt you, you just also have a record Michael. I want to make sure you stay safe.”

“Mary, I promise I was indeed behaved while I was out today, I am aware that I am… Presenting in the best way that I could be but I just needed a little space, and today I was given that, I felt like I was allowed to breathe again.”

Mary gave Michael another look before sighing and pulling her arm out of his and turned to walk towards her room. “Very well brother, I’ll let the matter rest but do not forget to take the matter but with Father Keir still. I am glad that you seem to be feeling more like yourself again, it has been quite a long time since I’ve seen you this relaxed.”

With a shake of his head he sighed, he shook his head and turned to walk in the other direction- The one towards Keir's office. The sooner he faced his punishments the less harsh things would be to deal with, at least that's how it usually worked.

Just before he reached Keir's office though he stopped in front of a large stained glass window. It was dark out of the colours were not as bright as they unusually were yet it brought him the same feelings of comfort- and of dread that passing it usually did.

The windows’ image was of the tree of life, it was large and ornate. It was beautiful. But its background was of red hues, it was haunting in the dark without the light of the sun shining through and all that he could ever picture against the large oak with those red glass panes behind it was the blood that had been shed all through his life. His own, as well as his parents.

Stealing himself once more he took a deep breath and then walked down the hall that led to Keirs office. He knocked once. Twice. And then a low, almost gruff yet ever hypnotic voice called out from the side. “Enter.”

[kudosmyhero]

Transformers (vol. 1) #21: Aerialbots Over America

Read Date: May 23, 2023 Cover Date: October 1986 ● Writer: Bob Budiansky ● Penciler: Don Perlin ● Inker: Ian Akin ◦ Brian Garvey ● Colorist: Nel Yomtov ● Letterer: Janice Chiang ● Editor: Michael Carlin ●

**HERE BE SPOILERS: Skip ahead to the fan art/podcast to avoid spoilers

Reactions As I Read: ●I’m curious if the aerialbots are separate from the Seekers ● maybe they are different. it’s hard to tell for sure on the cover, but I think they have Autobot sigils ● “Don’t worry, Maria, nothing can make me forget.” Morgan Freeman voice: But something did make him forget. ● creepy

● got a few new Decepticon names: Shrapnel, Kickback, and Bombshell ● Insecticons! first saw them at the end of season 1 of the G1 cartoon. one of them had a very creepy way of talking by repeating the last word of his sentence, sentence. ● I still don’t understand how the Transformers still aren’t 12 tons when they transform into something small, like an insect ● Ricky just walks on past the security guard holding a gun (Megatron) and the guard doesn’t challenge him about it at all ● doesn’t matter if they’re there at your request, Optimus. Ratchet’s word should outweigh yours in terms of medical treatment ● Ratchet: “You may be commander of the Autobots, but in my sick bay you’re just another patient!” there we go. ● the Aerialbots are: Silverbolt, Slingshot, Fireflight, Air Raid, and Skydive ● yo, Circuit Breaker’s back! ● 👏👏👏👏

Synopsis: Richard Vasquez supervisor of Hoover Dam bids farewell to his family before going off to another day of work. He is struck by a cerebro shell fired by Bombshell, putting him under the Insecticon's thrall. Taken to Megatron, the begin their mission to take over the dam, Megatron transforming into gun mode to act as a weapon for Vasquez to take the dam hostage with. Breaking his way into the control room with the help of the Insecticons, Vasquez, under Megatron's orders orders the controllers to turn off the dam.

Meanwhile, at the Ark, repairs are being done to Optimus Prime as Donny Finkleberg imparts important information about some Autobots that appeared on Earth. Proving that he can show them where these new Autobots materialized, Optimus agrees to send Jetfire out to learn the truth of Donny's claims. Just then Bumblebee rushes in to tell Optimus Prime about capturing of Hoover Dam. Deciding that this needs immediate action and calls in Wheeljack's newest creation: The Aerialbots. Although only their commander Silverbolt has been fully programmed by the Creation Matrix, Prime sends the entire group to investigate Decepticon activity at the dam.

At Hoover Dam, Vasquez completes his mission in securing the dam and the Insecticons take control of the facility. A Space Bridge then materializes and Ramjet, Thrust, and Dirge emerge from it to oversee a giant boring device travel through the bridge and drill into the dam in order to siphon it's energies out. Elsewhere, Jetfire and Donny arrive at the site where the seven Autobots materialized, and find no trace of Jetfire's comrades, but they find a source of fuel on the ground prompting Jetfire to return to base with Donny in order to fashion a tracking device to locate the missing Autobots.

While at Hoover Dam, the Aerialbots arrive and attempt to stop the drilling, but find opposition from Dirge, Ramjet, Thrust and the Insecticons. Finding that they cannot stop them individually, the five Aerialbots merge into Superion and is able to destroy the boring device. When Vasquez appears on top of the dam and attempts to shoot Superion with Megatron, Superion reaches to kill the human, with Silverbolt's mind fighting with the others to prevent them from killing a human. when Vasquez's daughter (on the scene with her mother since the take over) cries out to her father, Vasquez manages to break free of Bombshell's control. While Silverbolt forces the other Aerialbots to disconnect, Vasquez takes Megatron and fires at the Space Bridge, causing it to vanish back to Cybertron. With his plot foiled, Megatron and his Decepticons retreat. As the Aerialbots retreat themselves they are completely unaware that Bombshell has followed along for the ride.

While at the secret headquarters of a new government agency, the Rapid Action Anti-Robot Team (RAAT) Circuit Breaker, the group leader have returned with their first successful "kills", the Autobots Blaster, Perceptor, Beachcomber, Powerglide, Warpath, Cosmos and Seaspray!

(https://marvel.fandom.com/wiki/Transformers_Vol_1_21)

Fan Art: TFA Aerialbots Final Lineup by dou-hong

Accompanying Podcasts: ● Transformers Chronicles - episode 21

● Transformers University - episode 62

[fatedwithmbc]

1.4.3; A new way I learned to say “I love you” when I was in Scituate. There is some lore behind it involving a lighthouse. The whole thing resonated with me because of Dad’s love of light houses. I also had a chance to go to a local cafe that sold t-shirts, I picked the one that reminded me most of my Dad. A tattooed man, wearing a beanie (only he was a fisherman and not a welder) in the color green. I’ve been struggling the last few days with emotions related to missing my Dad. I’m still so angry with the world that I have to live each day without him, especially through my diagnosis; but also because he was my voice of reason when I needed advice about different things.

Mom-Mom really fills the advice void for me, but sometimes, I need a third party. Sometimes, we don’t see eye-to-eye on things. Sometimes, I don’t love her advice, even if it’s the “right” advice. And that’s not a HER problem, that’s a ME problem. I usually recognize when it’s me because it comes with feelings of shame and guilt. I love her, and I know her advice is always in my best interest and what she thinks is right for me and my life. As much as we could be shaken by our differences in opinion, we quickly come to resolution. That is something I am most thankful for. I am able to be honest in my opinions without worry that it will do damage to our relationship. I think we have so much mutual respect for each other that it allows us to have difficult conversations. I truly am grateful for how we communicate and how we respect each other.

I lost a relative last week. He succumbed to a glioblastoma. I was able to attend one of the viewings with my brother. I was grateful for the time I was able to spend with him one-on-one despite the circumstances of the situation. This relative was from my mother’s side of the family, with whom I’ve been estranged. I feel like my diagnosis is really putting heavy pressure on my heart to reconcile, be with and show all of my relatives in some way that I love and care about them.

That said, I was able to make it to Scituate for the family reunion (relatives from my Dad’s side of the family). I was thankful to spend time with that side. It’s not often we see them due to distance. My diagnosis and recent back problems makes it increasingly more difficult to drive the distances. I’m glad there is no reconciling needed with the “Jones” side of the family. They are all dear to me. My great-aunts have been so supportive and thoughtful- they often send me cards or call/text me to ensure I’m doing well. They also like to stay up-to-date on my treatment and progress. I am thankful beyond words. My cousins (Great? Once removed? Twice removed? I don’t know the formal, appropriate term) are all amazing and supportive as well. Especially my cousin Michael and his wife, Heather.

It was nice to travel for a few days. It was also nice to get back home. The short travel did take “it” out of me. I was very exhausted last night and struggled a bit today. I’m still not used to the limitations of my body and recognizing them so I don’t “over do” it. I miss my pre-diagnosis energy and capabilities. I try to treat myself as normal as possible. I even forget sometimes that I have a serious illness, as I think others do as well. I look healthy, but I’m not inside. It was wonderful to hear from my relatives (both sides) that I looked very well. However, it makes me think, do I need to look sick to be sick, and obviously that answer is no. I am sick, I do look well. It’s almost like I need to wear some sort of identifier that says: “I am sick” so that people believe me. I say this because I had an incident boarding a plane - I was in group D, but boarded with the guests with disabilities. The flight attendant basically had a retort for everything I said about why I was boarding in the earlier group until I stated “I have Stage IV Breast Cancer”. Her face said it all. I felt bad, she felt bad- it was awkward for both of us. This is just another part of the process that I need to get used to. I still don’t like saying it out loud. I especially do NOT like saying it to a stranger unless there is a distinct reason why I’d need to divulge that information.

I feel as on edge right now as I did then. I’m out of my anxiety medication and there were problems at the pharmacy with their electronic prescription system. I’m hoping this will all be resolved tomorrow. I feel like the lack of anti-anxiety medication is making the anxiety sky rocket. I feel like that’s why I decided to write this evening. I have a jittery feeling and needed to let the energy out, but wasn’t even sure where I was going to start or where I would end up in terms of topic and subject. I guess I’ve been able to figure that out. I’ve even used my lavender spray… I think I will need to actually use my diffuser this evening though for constant release of the scent. I truly believe in its calming properties.

Some random thoughts that don’t fit into a paragraph in a logical manner:

- I completed all paperwork and got my photo taken to submit for passport renewal. I just need to mail it tomorrow.

- I’m still very in love with and believe in the benefits of my weighted blanket. Although, mine is definitely too heavy for my weight now. I lost weight after I bought it due to my diagnosis.

- It’s great to have Bailey around. The pooch is great for feeling loved and she definitely cares when you get home and shows her excitement. Even after running an errand, she’ll respond as if I’ve been gone for weeks with her level of excitement upon my return.

- I received a book of poetry that I ordered by Pierre Alex Jeanty, called “Heal. Grow. Love. Words to Help You Become”. I am enjoying it very much. The poetry directs itself toward insecurities, like doubts, and how you can handle or reframe them to overcome them.

- I’ve had some intermittent contact with a man that I went on a date with. I’m hoping to see him before I travel to Colorado.

- I’ll see Brittany this week for dinner; the excitement is real. We’ll meet up for dinner this time. I truly can’t wait to see her.

- I’m hoping that the DSLR Camera I want goes on sale for Prime Day. I also placed Botanical Lego sets to my cart to see if they go on sale as well, because Mom-Mom can get them cheaper that way (I asked for them as birthday gifts).

- Moulin Rouge opens this week, and I can’t wait to see it. I have my ticket for Thursday evening. I will drive into town this time as I don’t want to risk missing my train. It was too close for comfort last time I went into town for a show and basically had to run to the train station and made it with only about 3 minutes to spare. The parking fee I’m sure will be a bit high, but I won’t have to run or be on high alert about the time during the show, which will allow me to focus on enjoying it and the music.

I believe I’m at the end of my entry for this evening; however, if I awake- there may be more to come. Thank you for being here and reading my thoughts, concerns and emotions.

El Fin.

[dyns33]

Flufftober 13 - Vulcan Michael

Vulcan Michael Langdon x reader 

For Michael, Halloween was totally illogical.

But most of the things humans did were totally illogical, so he shouldn't be surprised by this weird party where people pretended to be someone else, sometimes other species than their own, or even worse, beings which did not exist.

For several days, Y/N had tried to explain to him why it was important, a kind of custom, that you shouldn't look for logic in customs, just see that it was a good time, to share, to relax, during which people could have fun and forget their worries for a night.

           "Yes, okay, the way of having fun is not logical, and it's also ridiculous to ignore your problems instead of trying to solve them but... But that's it !"

           "But that's it ?" he repeated, raising an eyebrow.

           "Yes, that's it !"

           "Very well, t'nash-veh ashaya."

           "... So you agree to dress up and come go candy hunting with me ?" she asked with a small pout, knowing that he was illogically having a hard time resisting her when she was doing that face.

           "I don't see why I would refuse, as long as the costume is not offensive."

"          I had thought of an elf."

           "... That's a bit offensive."

           "A vampire then. And I'll be a young princess, under your spell and totally at your mercy."

           "Illogical."

           "But that's it !"

           "Yes ashal-veh." he sighed, trying not to smile, even though smiling wasn't as illogical as the Vulcans thought. It showed that we were happy.

It was just better to be happy inside, in a controlled way.

It was therefore filled with discreet joy that Michael accompanied Y/N in the streets to collect sweets. Of course, he didn't dare hold her hand in public, it was highly inappropriate.

And he repeated to her that sweets and other delicacies were not good for her health.

He also noticed that there weren't many disguised adults knocking on doors.

           "Michael." Y/N said kindly looking at him with wide eyes. "You know very well what I'm going to answer you."

           "Hmm. That's this is what this celebration is about, so you won't be logical, you will do whatever you want with regards to holding my hand, eating, and going out in costume, and that's it."

           "Exactly."

           "Just promise me not to eat everything too quickly, I don't want you to get sick."

Despite his grunts of protest and the fact that several people were watching them, Y/N kissed him on the cheek, saying that he was cute, and promising to be reasonable.

It didn't really convince him, because he knew that his human and he didn't have the same definition of what was reasonable.

So he wasn't really surprised to find her on the sofa, still wearing her big dress, her face covered in sugar and chocolate. Using her little pout, she tried to avoid his criticism.

           "Whether I eat them now or later, it's almost the same."

           "The nuance is in the 'almost', ashal-veh. You promised me."

           "I only ate five ! Well... Maybe seven. Or more. But there's still plenty left. You can take some if you want. You chased them too, you deserve them. Oh Michael, come on, try one !"

           "No, it is not..."

           "Michaaaaael ! For me, please !" she begged, holding up a candy to him, waiting for him to eat it straight away.

It was illogical, but he couldn't refuse it. He could never deny her anything.

And he didn't realize at all that he was eating chocolate, sitting next to her, letting her feed him again and again.

Since Michael had never told her about the effect of chocolate on Vulcans, he couldn't blame Y/N. She hadn't really forced him to eat it either.

He was the only responsible for this situation, which his mate did not understand right away.

It was a real surprise for her to see him smiling and laughing like it was perfectly normal, moving oddly.

           "Your cheeks are all green. Are you sick ? Oh, I hope you're not allergic to something ! I can call a doctor, I..."

           "It's all right, ashal-veh." he chuckled, taking her in his arms. "I'm fine. I've never felt so good. My love. My life. I'd like to take you far away, to a cave, where no one can take you. I'll build you a house and we'll have plenty of children."

           "... What ?"

           "I don't like it when other people touch you. Or when they look at you. You're mine. You're mine, aren't you ?"

           "Yes Michael, I'm yours. But you're not in your normal state, you... Are you purring ? And you...  Are you biting my neck ? Michael ?!"

           "You smell so good, t'nash-veh ashaya. T'nash-veh ashal-veh. T'nash-veh ta'hal. Nash-veh ashaya du, weht do kanok-vei. Worla trasha nash-veh, sanoi . Wuh panu tor gu'gelik heh herbosh rik' du."

Vulcans having a denser mass than humans, it was not easy for Y/N to drag Michael to the bedroom. He didn't really help her, before falling asleep in the middle of the bed.

The next morning, his head hurt terribly. With great difficulty, he prepared tea and meditated for several hours, until Y/N woke up.

Despite his meditation, he behaved slightly illogically by "sulking", refusing to talk about what had happened and decreeing that they would never again participate in Halloween, which was a holiday as dangerous as it was illogical.

He later tried to banish several other holidays where chocolate was present, such as Christmas when Y/N served him hot chocolate, or Valentine's Day, before accepting that he could not escape this toxic product, and that anyway, Y/N found him so adorable when he was drunk that he could eat some from time to time to please her.

But only if there were no other witnesses to see it.

[gubler-me-up]

No Need to Rush

Request: can u pls do a spencer x bau fem! reader where she’s dyslexic but also a genius like spencer and like someone maybe another member of the team/unsub makes a comment abt her being stupid. and she gets really upset abt it. then later spencer comforts her and they have really romantic but rough sex. where he’s just like reassuring her of how smart and beautiful she is.

A/N: Thanks for the request, anon! Sorry this took a lil long to complete but I wanted to make sure I wrote this accurately and incorporate everything you wanted into it! Please let me know if you don’t feel as if this representation of dyslexia sits right with you and I will edit it no problem. This fic also concludes smut week (woo!) so I hope you enjoy 💓 

Couple: Spencer Reid/Fem!reader

Category: Smut

Content warning: Learning disorder degradation, mentions of violence, rough sex, fingering, penetrative sex, creampie, choking

Word count: 3.2k

-------------

It was the dead of winter in Seattle, Washington and a sniper decided it was the best time to have some target practice. His target practice ended up taking three innocent people’s lives as they were living their day-to-day lives. To top off his killing spree, he wrote handwritten letters to the police department. His letters were rambles about him not stopping until he finds his final target.

Hotch had left Spencer and you to go over the letters to try and figure out any indications of who his final target could be. He had sent JJ and Morgan to interview the victim’s family members to try and see if there were any similar people in their circle. Having you four working diligently on piecing the entire story together could end up saving another person from meeting an early demise.

You loved working with Spencer because the two of you were always up to speed with your thinking process. Both of you analyzed each letter with care, making sure nothing was missed which could possibly be used as a clue in identifying who this person and who their real target is.

You felt as if you were taking too long to go through every letter. There were about 20 of them and his incoherent rambles were giving you a hard time efficiently reading them. You had 10 to go through and Spencer was already finished and writing on the whiteboard clues he found in the letters. You were still on your seventh letter, dissecting and writing down what you thought was important. You couldn’t help feeling bad you were taking a long time.

“I’m sorry,” you said.

Spencer looked back at you with a questionable expression. “For what?”

“For taking forever. I’m taking up time reading these letters when I should be brainstorming with you.”

“Y/N, you’re not slowing down the process. If anything you taking your time can identify some major evidence.”

“Yeah, but you could do it within two minutes.”

“Doesn’t mean anything. Valuable information is valuable information no matter how long it takes you to find it. Besides you’re the smartest person I know, so nothing will get past you.”

“Doesn’t feel like it sometimes.”

“I’m here to remind you it’s all the time. I’ll be here to remind you every day if you ever doubt yourself.”

You smiled as you felt your worries drifting away. You were always self-conscious about having dyslexia. Growing up with it was the hardest part of your early years because people would see your extraordinary capabilities but questioned them whenever you had to read or spending longer than usual completing tasks. It was embarrassing for you. Even in adulthood you felt anxious about letting people know you were dyslexic because you were worried they wouldn’t see you as a genius.

When you let the members of the team know you were dyslexic, they accepted you as you were. It made you feel welcomed and understood for once in the longest while. It was especially nice hearing Spencer say you were a genius regardless of your dyslexia. You felt as if he understood you the most out of everyone because he had a rough time growing up as a child prodigy.

As you continued to read through the letter you were on, something caught your eye. You looked up at the whiteboard to see what Spencer had written. He had written about sunsets, trees and a park. He had concluded it was about Kerry Park in Seattle and speculated the unsub could possibly live near there. What you had read though made you think of a different possibility.

“Kelly Park,” you said aloud.

Spencer turned to you. “Kelly Park?”

Before you could explain your findings, Hotch and detective Royce entered the room. You were happy they did, so you could explain to everyone your theory as to who the unsays actual target is.

“Find any useful information we can put towards finding the unsub?” Hotch asked.

You nodded. “Yes. Kelly Park’s the end goal.”

“Kelly Park? You mean Kerry Park by West Highland,” detective Royce said.

“No, I mean, yes, but the unsub slipped up…uh no, they-uh- replaced Kelly with Kerry because there is a Kelly Park who lives nearby,” you explained.

“Wait, so is it Kerry or Kelly the name of the person who lives nearby Kerry’s Park?” Hotch asked.

“Sorry, sir. It’s Kelly Park who lives nearby Kerry’s Park.”

“How can you even speculate that?” Detective Royce asked.

“Because it’s in this letter. He says, ‘I spend my days looking at Kelly Park and wondering when I’d be brave enough to leave. I don’t think I am but one day I’ll be free,’” you said while holding it up.

Detective Royce took it from your hand to take a closer look. He furrowed his eyebrows as he read. He looked back up at you questionably.

“Maybe he’s dyslexic. Only an idiot would write Kelly instead of Kerry when referring to Kerry Park,” he said.

You clenched your jaw as he said his ignorant statement. You knew the unsub wasn’t dyslexic and you had a clue right infant of you. You snatched the letter away from his hands as you took a deep breath to calm yourself down.

“I’m actually dyslexic myself and I can tell you right now this unsub is not,” you said.

“I should have known from the time you mixed up Kerry and Kelly in your explanation. For a genius you sure don’t talk like one,” he said.

You felt your eyes stinging from the tears which were trying to breakthrough. What he said was familiar to everything you heard from your childhood. It was degrading to hear it when you knew you were on to something. Especially evidence which could potentially save someone.

“Don’t talk to one of my agents with such disrespect, Royce. My team and I would never slander your team, so we expect the same courtesy back,” Hotch said.

“Hotchner, you can’t seriously believe this is a connection,” detective Royce said.

“Who said it couldn’t be?” Spencer said.

“Common sense. He’s trying to mess up his words on purpose to take us off track from what really matters,” detective Royce said.

“Well, I’m not taking that risk. While you stand there with your arro…ignorance, I’ll actually go and do something about this piece of evidence,” you said as you walked by him to exit the room.

You could feel your heart drop with every step you took. Before you called Garcia you took a trip to the washroom. You went into a stall and made sure it was locked before you let your tears escape. You hadn’t felt humiliated for the longest time. The questionable look and harsh comments detective Royce spat at you made you feel sick. You knew you were smart and you knew you were onto evidence to save someone’s life. Yet you were doubted.

You wiped your tears away and took a few deep breaths before exiting the stall. You couldn’t let what he said distract you from finding Kelly Royce. You knew it would affect you for the rest of the day but you would sleep better at night knowing you saved a life. You didn’t want to be crying over two things tonight.

------

You sat on the edge of the hotel room bed. You had finished getting ready for the night and were ready to get into bed to forget about the day. You were happy you were right about Kelly Park and saved her hours before she was scheduled to go into the heart of Seattle for an appointment. Her ex-boyfriend, Michael Richards, had plotted for months on how to make her death look like an accident. Too bad his guilty conscience and ego didn’t mix well and he compulsively wrote down his thoughts.

It bothered you immensely detective Royce still didn’t give you your flowers at the end of everything. You understood not everyone would apologize for their ignorance and you should be used to it by now. However, you couldn’t help but think about it over and over.

You heard a few light knocks on your hotel room door. You looked at the clock. It was 11 p.m. You got up to go peek through the peephole to see who was trying to get your attention this time of night. You looked through the peephole and saw Spencer standing outside. You opened the door. As you opened it he looked at you with a smile but you could see the concern in his eyes.

“What brings you to this part of town so late?” You asked.

“I want to make sure you’re okay before you go to bed. I know how frustrating today was for you and I don’t want you going to bed with doubt on your mind,” he explained.

You stepped aside and gestured him to come inside your hotel room. You were happy he had stopped by. He was always the first one to give you words of encouragement and a reason to put your doubts aside. You closed the door and made your way over to the edge of the bed to sit. You patted the spot next to you for him to sit down. He took the seat next to you, sitting closer to you than expected. You two were shoulder to shoulder and thigh to thigh. It was comforting to you for him to be so close.

“You know, if it wasn’t for you pointing out Kelly Park in his letter, she might not be alive,” he said.

“I know and I’m glad it worked out in the end. I just…”

You trailed off as a wave of doubt overthrew your thought process. You started to think if you had been wrong, if it were just your dyslexia getting the best of you, an innocent life could have been taken. A tear slipped from your right eye. You quickly wiped it away before Spencer saw. He must have seen it escape because he placed his hand on your thigh and squeezed it.

“You have a beautiful mind, Y/N,” he assured you.

“It doesn’t translate properly when I say the wrong words, read slower than average, mix up-”

“And all that doesn’t make a difference to how you save lives every day. If detective Royce wasn’t so prideful he would have thanked you properly for bringing to light what they brushed off,” he said.

You chuckled. “Yeah, he is a prideful idiot.”

“Exactly, so don’t let him or other doubters get to you. I believe in you wholeheartedly and always will. The team does as well, so we’ll always back you up.”

You smiled brightly at him as you felt your deep sadness fade away. He had such a way with words you felt as if you could rule the world solely based on his encouragement. You opened up your arms and embraced him in a hug. He wrapped his arms around the small of your back. He rubbed your back gently as you placed your head comfortably in the crook of his neck.

“I love how you’re always here for me, Spence,” you whispered into his neck.

“I’ll always be here to remind you of your worth and beauty,” he said.

You leaned up from his neck and faced him straight on. Your faces were just an inch away from each other as you lost yourself in his eyes. You softly smiled and found yourself saying things before your brain could process them.

“I could just kiss you right now,” you blurted out.

“Why don’t you?” He asked.

You were now speechless as you weren’t expecting him to be open to the idea. Perhaps he did find more than just your mind to be beautiful. One of his hands moved from your back and found its way to the side of your face. He moved your face closer to his and your lips finally met each other. He gently eased his tongue into your mouth before he dived fully into your mouth.

You placed your hands on his chest. You pulled on his shirt to bring him forward even more to minimize the space between you two. He moved his hands and placed them both on your hip. He brought you onto his lap without breaking your kiss. You glued your hands to his face to prevent him from even considering moving away from you. His hands squeezed before slipping his hands down your pyjama pants.

You didn’t give it a second thought and raised yourself off his hips so he could pull your pants off along with your underwear. He leaned away from your lips as he stared at you with a deep yearning in his eyes. He caressed his hands up your thighs, to your hips and then under your shirt. He pulled your shirt off to reveal your bare breasts.

“I hope you like what you see,” you said.

He smiled. “Of course. You’re beautiful beyond words.”

He then placed your right nipple in his mouth and swirled his tongue around your nipple. You moaned loudly as his tongue made your nipple feel a stimulation you never thought they could feel. He freed your nipple from his mouth as he quietly hushed you.

“We can’t let anyone know where in the same room together,” he whispered.

“I don’t care,” you said as you desperately leaned into him to steal another kiss.

He kissed you back. You held his head in place so he wouldn’t dare move away from you again. You soon felt his thumb circling around your clit. It wasn’t enough to make you stop kissing him but it made you release endless moans into his mouth. You then felt him shove two fingers into you which made you stop kissing him and set your moans free into the atmosphere. He pumped his fingers in and out of you so quickly you couldn’t find the time to catch your breath.

“If you can’t handle my fingers, how do you expect to handle my dick, beautiful?” He asked.

“I…I can,” you stammered.

He smiled. “I haven’t doubted you yet, have I??”

He took his fingers out of you and went to work on undoing his pants. You stared down at his huge bulge as he slipped down his pants and then his underwear. Your eyes widened as you saw his dick. He looked at you to see the amazement in your eyes. He softly chuckled as he grabbed your ass and squeezed it tight as he brought you forward to position you.

“Sit down on it and try not to be too loud,” he demanded.

You did what he asked and lowered yourself onto his dick. The further you went beyond the tip the more your mouth went agape. You could barely even get to the base without feeling as if his dick was already completely inside of you. He did you the favour and forced you all the way down on his dick. You let out a shriek which was cut short by him sticking his two fingers coated in your juices inside your mouth.

“Bounce on it and don’t make a sound. Understand?” He asked.

He nodded your head ‘yes’ for you and you started bouncing on his dick. You could feel your legs quaking as you engulfed his dick in and out of your repeatedly. Once you established a rhythm, you rolled your eyes to the back of your head and enjoyed every inch of his dick stretching your walls.

“How about we pick up the pace?” He asked.

Your eyes shot open as he bucked his hips up and disrupted your rhythm with his new set motion. You moaned heavily around his fingers as his dick kept ramming into you with no mercy. He used his other hand and squeezed your left breast. He licked your breasts before gently biting your nipple.

“Fuck,” you moaned.

“I only ever treat extraordinary women like this,” he said.

“Really?” You moaned.

He lifted you off his dick and laid you on the bed. He gently wrapped his large hands around your throat as he positioned himself on top of you. You could feel your adrenaline pumping as he lowered his face down to yours and kissed you softly on your lips before he stared into your eyes.

“You’re the only extraordinary woman I know,” he said.

“Fuck me like an extraordinary woman,” you said.

He obliged and rammed his dick into you with urgency. You moaned repeatedly as you took in every inch of his dick inside of you. He kissed along your jawline before reaching your ear.

“Who gets fucked like this?” He asked.

“Extraordinary women,” you whimpered.

“And what are you?” He asked.

“An extraordinary woman,” you whimpered.

As he continued to fuck some sense into you, he whispered nothing but the sweetest things in your ear. He called you beautiful, brilliant, amazing and his favourite, extraordinary. It felt nice hearing those things being repeated over and over in your ear especially by him. His dick definitely enforced the message as with every word he said to you, his motion would intensify. You wrapped your legs around him as he continued to fuck you.

“Where do you want me to cum, beautiful?” He asked.

“Inside of me,” you moaned.

He tightened the grip around your neck. “Louder.”

“Inside of me,” you shrieked.

“Look at me while I cum inside of you,” he demanded.

He grabbed your face to keep you still so your eyes were focused on him the whole time. He bit his bottom lip as he stared at your worn-out expression as he fucked you. He slowly stopped going at his rapid pace and soon stopped. You felt his cum fill your insides and you let out a soft moan at the feeling.

He let go of your neck and eased up from on top of you. You felt him stick two fingers in you and he pulled them out quickly. He placed his cum covered fingers on your lips. You opened your mouth and licked the cum dripping off his fingers.

“I don’t ever want you to doubt yourself again. You’re fucking amazing,” he said.

You leaned up on your elbows and smiled. “You are too.”

“Since I can’t stay in your room for the night without raising suspicions in the morning, how about we do something when we get back home and you can stay the night at my place? You know, for extra reassurance,” he said with a smile.

You giggled. “I’d love that.”

He leaned into you and gave you another big kiss on the lips. As he parted from your lips he stared at you with softer eyes from before and brushed your hair back.

“Maybe I’ll stay for a few more minutes. You like cuddles?” He asked.

“I love them,” you said.

He chuckled. “Great because I have a deep desire to cuddle you and make you know you’re treasured.”

You could have cried when he said that. Instead you wrapped your arms around his neck and pecked him on the lips. It wasn’t the best time to cry. You wanted to cherish the moment as a positive part of the day.

“Thank you, Spence. You’re extraordinary.”

“I guess that makes us a perfect match.”

“It sure does.”

—–

Tagged: @shadyladyperfection​, @slutforthegubes​, @pinkdiamond1016​, @spencerreidsthings​, @itsmyblogandillreblogifiwantto​, @slutforsr​ @bxtchboy69​, @fallinallinmendes​

MASTERLIST

[winged-fool]

You know. This was a quality episode. I love that we’re FINALLY getting quality alien lore and I’m digging the intrigue. And I am deeply okay with being wrong about why Bonnie kissed Michael. Because it leads to some other intriguing possibilities like is the reason tesca trapped Alex underground because of some “true loves kiss” trope where Alex’s kiss could save Michael and restore his alien abilities? Riley was a gift so far this season and I’m sad to see her go. Especially since for a minute there it seemed like there was a possibility of her getting her happily ever after with Dallas.

I am still annoyed Rosa has been shunted off into the void with Greg and Flint. Not that I love Greg, but man. This show is great at forgetting about a character’s existence when they aren’t on screen. I do have mixed feelings about all the Valenti lore we’re getting. I think it’s awesome and fun but I also hate the way the show and fandom ignore that Jim Valenti was kind of a garbage human. Also I wish they would have done more with the Manes family and how Alex’s tribe tied into everything. Because post season 2 they seemed to forget the Manes brothers are indigenous and that their moms people protected Louise and that Louise was a part of their community until she died.

And just being salty as hell. I get that the Dallas/Maria thing is probably happening because they couldn’t get Tanner back this season but it also feels out of place because they did start setting up Dallas/Jenna then forgot about it. But they also haven’t said if Delmanes broke up. We just know greg is off at grad school. I’m assuming they won’t actually say anything about Delmanes again until the final episode at this point.

But hey Kybel finally happened so. At least we won there tonight in regards to ships. 🍤🍤🍤

Hello my friend!! Yeah I honestly liked the episode, I think the pacing was a bit too fast so I may need to rewatch it to get everything. Someone mentioned that the trailer made it seem like the reason Michael is sick is because of Bonnie's kiss??? And if that's the case, I have Many Questions

I'm sooo sad to see Riley go, she's such a great actress, her range in the ep was ESPECIALLY good! But nah they had to get rid of her so Dallas/Maria can happen 🤮

I'm actually really upset that Rosa hasn't been mentioned AT ALL. Like wtf just a throwaway line my god. But you're right, if they're not on screen, they don't exist. We're lucky Alex has been mentioned since he's been missing.

I was thinking the SAME thing about Jim. I was like uhhh okay but wasn't he part of Project Shephard and was also super trash??? I get so angry when I think about how the Manes storyline was shunted so much.

I have mixed feelings about Kybel happening though! I've been waiting for it for so long and it's only happening because Isobel needs a rebound from Anatsa?? So unfair

[unalivejournal]

u mentioned only reading kripke era fic do you have a reclist 👀👀👀and if not could you link some of ur faves cuz the stuff that gets circulated the most right now is all like late late seasons fic and kripke era is my favorite too but im having trouble finding that many fics for it or even seasons 6-10 era which im fine with also. its just that like. the last five seasons were so bad that it makes fic generally worse too because people have to jump off of just Thee stupidest plot choices no matter how good their prose skills might be. but anyway yea if u have recs that would be awesome :)

hi anon i was thinking abt making a reclist and u just gave me the perfect excuse thank u

jess adamilligan’s kripke era fic recs

from making this ive learned that i never bookmark ANYTHING. sorry all of these r like….. 10k and under. i DO read longer fic but i don’t have any kripke era longfics bookmarked & tbh i prefer short oneshots

season one gen

disclaimer because it’s unfortunately needed: NONE of these are w*ncest! they’re all completely tagged as gen and i did not read them with the intent of consuming ship content.

Coaster Park by fogsrollingin, 10.4k, G, gen

Coaster Park had been experiencing an unusually high frequency of technical difficulties. Dean wouldn't have pulled a shift treating nauseated, heat-stroked, or dehydrated park-goers for that if he could've helped it, but when 'technical difficulties' were accompanied by rumors of things moving and stopping on their own in front of the operators' eyes, Dean had to throw down.

No historical tragedies or disasters in the area, ectoplasm, or EMF. Dean's only lead was a battered-looking kid that'd been coming to the park every day since it'd all started.

really interesting au fic! slightly ‘it’s a terrible life’. dean winchester is a hunter/EMT and sam wesson is a college kid destined to die on a roller coaster ride.

two basic motivating forces by sahwen, 7.8k, T, gen

He can’t cry, it’s not allowed; even as a child he was hushed into silence, whether his tears were from a long car ride or a late night or a raging fever. It’s never been an option, it’s never been an available outlet, and it’s not about to start being one just because he’s having an emotional breakdown on the bathroom floor.

Sam isn't only afraid of clowns.

BIG emetophobia tw (both for graphic depictions of nausea/vomiting and for the fact that this fic is about sam suffering from emetophobia) for this one but it’s my favorite sickfic. portrays anxiety over getting sick really well and is a fascinating examination of the different ways that sam’s fear of loss of control can manifest itself. also has lovely brothers content <3

Let’s Start at the Very Beginning (Remix of Just as Easy as 123) by nwspaprtaxis, 4k, T, gen

Dean’s functionally illiterate and Sam’s determined to remedy it...

PLEASE READ THIS ONE god it’s so sweet. dean never learned how to read properly due to his nomadic childhood and sam teaches him how.

dean/cas

Broadway Musical by Griftings, 9k, M, m/m

This is the day that marked the Holy and Blessed Union of Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle.

The merging of prominent bloodlines is always a grand occurrence, but breeding pedigree hunter families like Winchester and Harvelle is something to be rejoiced. It is also something to be meticulously planned, which thankfully the Host is very good at.

Or, the romantic comedy where Dean Winchester and Jo Harvelle are destined to get married, Castiel is given the task of playing matchmaker and fails terribly, the entire Heavenly Host becomes a sitcom audience, God warns against male pregnancy, and Jimmy Novak is incredibly unimpressed with angels in general.

somewhat of a fandom classic and the humor holds up wonderfully. a very silly fic completed with commentary from angel radio throughout the entire thing.

Sappiest Season by dollsome, 2.7k, G, m/m

In which Dean and Cas have to stop an evil Christmas tree (like you do), and it requires a little fake couple action.

hilarious little s5ish fic. one of the first i read when getting back into spn. i don’t want to spoil anything but this is my favorite pick me up and i still giggle randomly whenever i think about it

The (Mostly Accidental) Courtship of Dean Winchester by tuesday

Angelic marriage rites were never intended to go quite like this.

another fandom classic. ik this one is recced a lot but how could i NOT include it. dean and cas get married (mostly by accident) and they’re huge cunts about it

the one thing in the galaxy god didn't have his eyes on by prufrock, 2.4k, T, gen + m/m

“Wait,” Dean says. “Let me get this right. You can fly, right—you can teleport—but you can’t drive a car?”

or, after the events of S5E03 "Free to Be You and Me," Dean teaches Cas to drive. Cas finds it stressful

im always a sucker for a good ftbyam fic. also i can’t drive so. resonation

So Says The Sword by komodobits, 85k, E, m/m

The briefing was simple: ‘Stand guard over the Michael Sword until the battle is ready to commence. Await further instructions.’

Castiel doesn’t mind working security duty; he was briefed shortly after the initial salvation of the Sword from the pit, and again before taking up his position. He knows what to do. However, it’s easy to forget that the green room isn’t real. Time moves differently there, the space ever-changing to make a prison of mountains, cathedrals, salt flats, orchards, and whatever Castiel was led to believe about Heaven’s greatest weapon—Dean Winchester is something entirely unexpected.

NO introduction neede. i think everyone on spntumblr has read this already but still. if you haven’t then i am demanding that you read it NOW. tbh i’m just adding this one so that i have at least one long fic here 😭

the weight by @myaimistrue, 3.5k, T, gen + m/m

“Do you…” Bobby sighs. “Listen, Dean, do you have something you wanna tell me?”

It’s the conversational equivalent of being punched in the stomach.

Or, Dean works through some things with Bobby's help.

WHEN I SAW THE USERNAME I GASPED I HAD NO IDEA THIS WAS U. anyway i Love coming out fics idk why i just do. the world is ending and dean comes out to bobby

canticles by 2street2car, 10.3k, T, m/m

“But you know something? If I couldn’t get you laid, at least I gave you a good first date.”

feat: footsies at a Ruby Tuesday, stargazing, the recreation of an iconic "Dirty Dancing" scene (no, not that one—the other one), and practicing for When You're With A Girl.

another ftbyam fic that skepticalfrog (i believe?) recommended a while back. made me feel at least 28 new emotions

Epilogue by JayneL, 28k, E, m/m

Bobby is here, swearing somewhere above and behind him; and Dean is here, talking about 2014 like it's a foreign country; and Sam is here, and is not Lucifer. Which means-- Bobby is here, swearing somewhere above and behind him; and Dean is here, talking about 2014 like it's a foreign country; and Sam is here, and is not Lucifer. Which means--

Cas is no longer when he was. Lucifer sent him back.

Coda to 'The End'.

2014 cas gets sent back to 2009, feelings ensue etc. i don’t remember all the details of this one bc it’s been a while but it’s really good

bonus

currently reading

Fragile As We Lie by perilously, 11k, E, f/f

Dragging Bela Talbot out of perdition isn't so much a decision as it is a frantic choice based on gut instinct. Her soul is bright, if fractured, and Anna yearns to do good again after the perversion of free will that immediately preceded her death.

Bela's no ordinary human, though; she's prickly and damaged and beautiful, and Anna doesn't want to leave her side. So maybe they can figure out how to navigate post-resurrection, post-Apocalypse-that-wasn't Earth together.

[aquarii-writes]

Memories (Foolish x GN reader)

Notes: heavily implied AFAB as well as Reader being given different variations of momma/mommy. This turned out a bit sadder than I intended fuckin hell

WARNING: Death, pregnancy/after birth

Genre: angsty

WC: 1,864

Memories meant the world to Foolish. The memory of meeting you, your first kiss, and when you first spent the night were ingrained in his head. They were everything to him; especially since one-day he knew you wouldn't be here again.

Though seeing you now with his son? This might be the most special yet. Your baby boy sat wriggling in your arms. His eyes had yet to open but Foolish could already guess that they'd be green like his.

The baby's skin was already shining a gold color once all the blood was wiped away from his body. Tears fell from Foolish's eyes as he got closer to you. Sweat lined your forehead but you couldn't have been more beautiful.

"Can.. can I hold him?" Your husband's voice broke as he spoke to you. With a gentle chuckle you allowed your husband to take the baby in your arms; your precious son.

Holding the bundle in his arms, Foolish swayed to try and get Jr to open his eyes. "Common buddy. Lemme see your eyes" Foolish cooed at his son.

Puffy attended to you. Your bleeding had yet to stop but so far it was normal, just needed a few stitches to patch everything back up.

Jr kept wiggling around in his father's arms. Poor thing just wanted his momma so he cried out for them. Jr's crying broke his father's heart, did the baby already not like him?

With a swift hushing Puffy pulled the baby boy away from his father and placed him back to his momma.

"Dad?" Puffy turned to her son, a curious look settled on her features. "Are they supposed to be this tired? I know birth is hard but-"

Puffy cut off her boy. "Everything (Y/n) is experiencing is normal bubs. They'll get their strength back in due time"

But that was nearly two months ago. You had suddenly grown weaker. Puffy couldn't find a reason nor could Ponk. The two of them checked you over and over yet still found no reason why you got so sick.

However your baby boy kept getting stronger. After you and Foolish were home and got back settled into a routine Jr quickly found comfort within his father's arms. Sweet thing was passed around between aunts, uncles, and grandparents but he would cry and scream towards everyone of them till he was back in your or Foolish's arms.

Though Jr seemed the sense that his momma was getting weaker. His glassy eyes would only stop when he found you.

Time seemed to work in Foolish's favor. He tried everything he could think of but nothing seemed to make you better. Till eventually just four months after Jr was born you started to finally get better.

So everything got better. You started to become yourself again and eventually the two of you had another child. A baby girl named Fin.

Jr was around a year and a half when his sister was born and the boy wouldn't stay still as he wanted to see you. Once everything was said and done Jr couldn't wait to see his momma and sister.

His jumbled sentences calling for Foolish to let him see momma. "Calm down we're gonna see momma" papa's chuckles made Jr smile. Once finally in the room Jr cuddled up to you and asked to see Fin.

Finley was wrapped in Jr's old baby blanket and small fins poked out from her head and back. Tiny little scales littered parts of her skin and looked like freckles. She looked more like a shark than a totem, but she was very much still Foolish's daughter.

A familiar worry bubbled up in Foolish's stomach. Would you get sick again like you did after Jr's birth? Birth will always be hard, but maybe it was easier this time now that Finley was a second baby.

Sensing his worry you waved for your husband to come over. "I'll be okay love-" the sweetness in your voice could've made him cry, "But incase something happens promise me that you won't neglect the babies. They will need their father"

Foolish's kisses lingered longer than he intended. Your two children were now asleep in your arms, but Foolish still worried. Your smile, albeit rather tired, was still bright.

"Can I hold her?" the line brought a sense of nostalgia. A gentle smile rested on your face as you held your daughter out to your husband.

"Of course my love"

Rain fell in waves as your daughter slept against her father. He held an umbrella over himself and Jr. The little boy didn't understand what was going on but kept crying that mommy wouldn't be able to get up if they were in the dirt.

While somber Foolish didn't let his tears fall till well after his children's bed time. Finny was only 4 months old and Jr was almost 2 a widow in just a matter of months.

The atmosphere was somber as Puffy picked up her grandson and attempted to explain that mommy won't wake up again, but just gave up in the end. Silent tears would just run down the rams face.

Foolish wouldn't leave your grave for a while. His arms numb from holding his baby girl but she was still asleep; it was only her whimpers to the cold and rain did he think to finally return inside.

Once the children were down to sleep did Foolish finally let out a sob. Heart wrenching cries filled the living room as he poured his heart out to his hands. You had written a letter before you passed and he couldn't bring himself to read it, at least not now. Not after he had to bury you.

Memories meant everything to Foolish, and he didn't think that he could forget you any time soon. Though he could still see you from these memories and from your letter and he could still physically see you in your children.

Jr had your hair though it was much darker while Finny had your eyes. Beautiful (e/c) eyes always shined through the little girls iris'. He could see you in how Jr acted and the way he touched his sister; always so gentle just as you had taught him to be. Finny would always reach for the things she knew were yours.

It just brought him to tears however Foolish knew new memories would be made with you still in them. Your beautiful eyes and personality will always be present in your children.

After a few years, once he got a handle of caring for two children on his own, Foolish finally opened your letter. Elegant script was written on the page.

'My Dearest Foolish,

If you're reading this then I've died. Whether it be not long after I write this or after a long life I am still dead, though I have a feeling its the former. How have our children turned out? I don't know if Jr will understand and Finley will have no memory of me... Does Finny still have my eyes? Is Jr still gentle with Finny? I know little boys can be so rough..

But aside from such please know that I love you. If I held the choice I would've stayed longer, but I'm on my last life. Maybe Lady Death could give me a pass? Maybe I could come back and see my babies? Oh if I continue thinking like this I'm going to cry..

I love you more than anything in this universe and I love our children all the same. I know that some day you'll find another to love, maybe it'll be me reincarnated? Just.. don't dwell on my death too long, if not for me for our children. Jr and Finny deserve to see their father happy.

I do hope that the both of them know I love them very much.. I know memories mean everything to you so please make new ones with Jr and Finny. Let me live on through them.

Forever with love, your dearest (Y/n)'

Tears fell on the aged parchment. It had been weathered before, presumably from your tears, but new wrinkles formed. Foolish has new memories. Your children did keep you alive within them.

Finny's eyes, while hers, were still yours. Her eyes shown just as bright as yours once did. While Jr is as gentle as ever with his baby sister. Snowchester was a new home for them all when you died, but it now means so much to the babies.

Foolish covered his mouth as he leaned over the coffee table. He didn't notice the tiny feet padding towards him. Finley's small hands gripped at her fathers fore arm. Big (e/c) pools stared into him.

Acting as though he wasn't crying Foolish dried his eyes and picked up the little girl. "What are you doing here sweetheart?"

"I got cold" Finny mumbled to her father and curled into him. Her scales had turned a golden color after you had passed. It was a shame you couldn't have seen how pretty Finny turned out to be, even at 5.

"Where's bubbas then?" evening out his tone Foolish sat back with Finny. The snow outside had started back up again to add a new layer to the landscape.

"Bubba is playing with Michael still. Mr. Tubbo and Mr. Ranboo asked if I wanted to come inside, but I wanted to play with you" Finny looked up at Foolish. She was tired and wanted a nap so she cuddled further into her father.

"Well you look pretty tired, sweets, how about we just go to sleep?" Finny shook her head no and stared at the open letter.

"Why were you crying daddy?" Finny's voice was quiet. Almost like she wasn't supposed to ask the question.

"Well... I was remembering mommy and reading a letter she gave me.." squeezing his girl, Foolish rested his head on hers. Jr nor Finny had ever really asked about their mother.

"What was mommy like? Mr. Ranboo says she was really nice before she went to sleep for a long time.." Finny played with the ends of her hair as she spoke to her father. Memories of you flooded his mind. The most prominent thing was how loving you were. You gave up all 3 of your lives for people you cared for.

"Well.. mommy loved you and bubbas very much. She loved a lot of people. Mommy was also very kind and helpful.. She would do anything to make sure people were happy-"

"Do I look like Mommy?" Finley gazed at her hands. The golden freckles that glittered her skin were something she had seen on no one else.

"You look a lot like mommy, Finny" Foolish lied through his teeth. She had your eyes but looked very similar to him over all. But if his little girl is happy then what of it?

Seemingly satisfied with her prodding Finny became silent again, and soon enough her little snores alerted Foolish to the fact that she was asleep.

I don't think I'll ever forget you (Y/n), but Finny sure won't let me try

[honeypiehotchner]

winter love (all i want for Christmas is you) -- Hotch x Fem!Reader

Hi hi hi!! I have literally been writing this on and off since September, and now I finally get to share it!! A few quick things: this fic has very much Hallmark vibes but does have a good dose of angst too; for the sake of this fic, Aaron was born and raised in Virginia; and Jack was never born (sorry buddy!).

I listened to Michael Bublé’s songs “All I Want for Christmas Is You” and “Cold December Night” a lot while writing this, so feel free to play those while you read! xx.

(The gif is from google because once again, my gif search is broken on here because apparently this post is too long?? Rip me)

Summary: You’ve returned back to your hometown after leaving to get your education, but you didn’t expect to run into your childhood best friend (and first love). 

Word count: 9.4k

HOTCH MASTERLIST || MAIN MASTERLIST

If you told yourself a few months ago that you’d be moving back to Virginia, you would’ve scoffed and probably laughed -- loudly. Your mom, on the other hand, would’ve been elated, and swore she knew it.

Like she’s doing now.

“I’m just so excited to have you home again,” she gushes, helping you carry boxes of your clothes up to your old childhood room.

The room needs some work, like taking down all these embarrassing posters and changing the sheets to something not so cringe-worthy (thankfully, it’s a full-size bed instead of the old twin you grew up sleeping on). But it’ll be fine for the time being. It’s not like you’re going to find an apartment right before Christmas, or that you even want to. It’s been a while since you’ve spent a full Christmas season with your mom.

You’ve been studying out of state for the past six years, working to get your masters and doctorate degrees — which you’ve completed. But now you need a job and a new start, which is why you decided to come home.

You’ve missed Virginia a lot more than you’ll admit. It’s hard not to miss your hometown when you’re gone from it for so long.

“We need a Christmas tree,” you say, as you come back down the stairs. “Christmas is next week, how do you not have a tree up yet?”

“I wasn’t going to get one without you,” your mom says like the fact should’ve been obvious to you.

You laugh as you plop down next to her on the couch. “I know. We should go tomorrow.”

“Whenever you want to,” she smiles, squeezing your arm. “Have you been to your coffee shop yet?”

“My coffee shop?” You raise an eyebrow. “Since when has it been mine?”

“Since you practically lived there during high school,” your mom counters.

She has a point. “Well, no, I haven’t. I just got here.”

“You should go.”

You raise both eyebrows this time, turning your entire body to face her. “What are you doing?”

“What do you mean?”

“Why are you trying to get me to go back there?”

“Why don’t you want to?”

You give her a look. “You know why.”

“I don’t.”

She does. She knows exactly what happened there.

“I’m not repeating it,” you mutter. “And I’ll be finding a new coffee shop, thank you very much.”

“Oh, you can’t let one bad experience stop you from going there!”

“So you do remember!”

“How could I forget? When you were a wreck for months after. I still never forgave him for that, you know.”

You shake your head, settling back against the couch pillows. “It’s been long enough now that I think forgiveness won’t hurt anyone.”

You say that, and yet you don’t want to step foot in that shop ever again.

+++

It was the summer before your junior year. Aaron was a rising senior, so there was the weight of it being his last year already hanging in the air. Especially when he was already looking at a pre-law track for college — meaning he’d be insanely busy after graduation with not much time for you.

Unfortunately, you didn’t realize that his being too busy for you would start before then.

You were a year younger — technically almost two, but the way your birthday fell, you were only one grade younger — but that didn’t stop Aaron from being your friend. At first you thought he had ill intentions (as most older boys in high school did), but he didn’t. He genuinely enjoyed your company, and you genuinely enjoyed his.

More than genuinely. You say now that you don’t believe in love at first sight, but you know that’s because it already happened for you, and you believe it to be a one-time deal.

That one time was when Aaron sat across from you at the lunch table.

You were alone and reading a book. You were a freshman then, and being an extra year younger didn’t exactly help in the whole making friends department. Especially when a lot of your peers were already aware of your age.

But Aaron wasn’t aware, nor did he even care.

He saw that you were alone, and reading, and he decided to sit with you. He wanted to read too, anyway, but he knew he didn’t always like being alone when he read. Something told him you were the same way.

He was correct.

It took almost the entire fall semester before either of you said one word to each other. Sometimes you’d be too engrossed in the book you were reading to even notice he’d sat down in front of you. And when you would finally notice, he would be the one with his nose too deep in the book to notice.

But eventually, you started sharing book recommendations.

Which eventually turned into helping each other with homework. You were always better at math and Spanish than he was (you were already in the sophomore levels of these classes as a freshman), but he was always good with history and English. He must’ve noticed you were in freshman English and history, but he never commented on it — at least not in a way that said he was bullying you.

That winter break was when you started going to the coffee shop together. It was within walking distance of the high school, so the two of you would go at the end of the day until your parents could pick you up. Sometimes your mom would drive him home, or vice versa.

And when Aaron got his license, he’d drive you both there and drop you off at home.

The two of you were inseparable. Almost literally.

Until Aaron met Haley.

Haley was in theatre. She was everything you weren’t. Aaron’s age, pretty, funny, outgoing, and worst of all: popular.

You watched your best friend fall in love.

And that wouldn’t have hurt as bad as it did if it wasn’t Haley he was falling for.

You kept your feelings for Aaron quiet, even to your mom — though you found out later that she always knew. You had almost thought he felt the same, or that he might be beginning to, and then suddenly he was talking about some girl named Haley.

Only she wasn’t just “some girl” to him, or even to you. Everyone knew Haley Brooks.

Slowly, your lunch table conversations were less about what the two of you were going to do the coming weekend, and more about Haley. How he was going to get her to notice him (join theatre, even though he never liked theatre before her). How he was going to ask her on a date (it wouldn’t be a date at first, just dinner after theatre rehearsal, that ended up being with the entire cast, but he sat next to her). How he was going to win her over (he brought flowers to the first performance and surprised her backstage). How he was going to ask her to be his girlfriend (that was the same night as the flowers, completely unplanned, but she said yes).

How he thought he might want to marry her one day.

The last hurt most of all. He confessed it to you one night out of the blue as he was driving you home after school. You knew you could handle him being in love with someone else. Some sick part of you knew — or hoped, rather — that the relationship wouldn’t last. What high school relationship lasts longer than a few months, anyway?

But when Aaron fell for Haley, he fell completely. And hard.

He started cancelling plans with you to spend time with Haley — before they were even dating. When they were dating, he stopped making plans with you altogether.

Then came the summer before his senior year.

It had been months since you saw him last. You had a new lunch period the second half of the year because one of your favorite teachers asked for help during the period, which meant you didn’t have lunch with Aaron — but you don’t even think he noticed.

June came and went. The two of you barely saw one another, barely talked when you did. But when you did, you clung to those moments like they were your only lifeline. In a way, they were.

July finally came and he actually made plans to see you. He said he wanted to get coffee again, catch up, hang out for a few hours, sit in silence, even, whatever you wanted. You were excited.

Some part of you thought that he had broken up with Haley — wishful thinking, but you were sixteen and in love, what else were you supposed to think?

But he hadn’t broken up with her. They were very much in love. You know. You witnessed it.

Apparently, Haley didn’t like the idea of Aaron getting coffee and lunch alone with a female friend. So, she took it upon herself to tag along.

You saw them sharing a kiss through the window, Aaron’s back facing you. When they pulled away, Haley’s eyes caught yours, but she said nothing to Aaron, just pulled him back in for another kiss.

You didn’t go into the shop that day. And you haven’t since.

The last time you saw Aaron was the day before he moved to college. He was stopping by to say goodbye to you.

You were reading a book in your room, and your eyes caught the movement on the driveway. You told your mom to say you weren’t home.

You watched him leave from your bedroom window, hands stuffed in his pockets.

+++

You heard that Aaron and Haley got married. Not because you wanted to hear, but because your mom told you. She probably meant well, but you drank an entire bottle of wine that night. You weren’t even 21 yet at the time.

Of course, it’s been years since then. You’re all fine now, and you’ve got the student loan debt to prove it.

But even with three degrees, job hunting can be a bitch. Especially this time of year.

You need coffee.

You blame the fact that this coffee shop is the best one around. And the fact that it’s Christmas season, meaning they have your favorite drink again.  

Dark chocolate peppermint mocha. It’s a godsend. And you haven’t had one in years.

Well, you have. But they haven’t been from here. They haven’t had this shop’s specially made peppermint whipped cream, or the peppermint stick that can be used to stir.

You hate how much you have to psych yourself up before you walk inside. You don’t even know where Aaron is these days or what he’s doing. He could be halfway across the country for all you know.

So, with that fact in mind, you walk inside. You embrace the familiar sight and smells, remembering what it felt like the last time you were here.

You move toward the counter, falling in the short line to the register. And your stomach flips when you see a familiar face standing in front of you.

Well, his back is facing you, so you don’t see his face, but you know it’s him. There’s this thing about first loves. It doesn’t matter how long it’s been since the last time you’ve seen them. You’ll always recognize everything about them. The back of their head, their shoulders, their hands, the way they walk.

Their voice. Even if it’s deeper than the last time you heard it.

Maybe he won’t recognize me.

But what you don’t know is that no amount of time could pass to make you unrecognizable to Aaron.

Or that he saw your reflection in the glass case next to him when you got in line, and he’s been internally trying to figure out what the hell to say to you since.

If it hadn’t been for his voice, you wouldn’t have recognized Aaron at all. A black coffee? That’s it?

The barista pours it and slides it over to him before he’s even done paying. He’s at a coffee shop -- this coffee shop, and he orders a black coffee?

Who is he?

You step up to the register as he steps away, and you swear you see him looking at you through the corner of your eyes. But you must be seeing things because why would he do that?

You focus on ordering -- a medium peppermint mocha, complete with the whipped cream and peppermint stick. After paying, you step to the side to wait for your coffee.

You nearly knock right into Aaron, but you stop yourself, well aware of his presence.

Another thing about first loves: you’re always painfully aware of their presence.

“Hi,” he says, awkward and fumbling even though it’s only one word. He’s wearing a stuffy suit and tie, which seems odd, but you’re positive that’s just normal lawyer attire. He probably lives in a suit these days. His hair is shorter than it used to be and he looks older, but so do you. Despite all of this, he’s still Aaron. He’s still the same Aaron Hotchner you fell in love with at sixteen.

“Hi,” you return the awkward smile, tugging on the strap of your purse. After a beat, you nod toward his drink. “Black coffee, huh?” You try to tease. “Who hurt you?”

He laughs loudly then, shoulders and head shaking. “I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you, too, Hotchner,” you murmur, wrapping your arms around yourself.

The conversation dies for a moment, so you busy yourself by looking at the different cakes and pastries in the glass case. You probably should’ve gotten one, but maybe another time.

Another time. Fifteen minutes ago you wouldn’t be caught dead in this shop and now you’re already thinking about another time.

“Are you busy?” Aaron suddenly asks, prompting you to look at him with furrowed brows. “Do you mind if I join you?”

“Not at all,” you smile gently, knowing you might regret this later. But it’s been over a decade since you’ve seen him last. One coffee won’t hurt.

And I’m over him, you remind yourself, no matter how untrue it might be.

Once you have your peppermint mocha -- finally, you think, it’s been too long -- you walk with Aaron to find a table. A lot has changed about this shop, but one thing that hasn’t (because there isn’t much that can be changed) is the seating.

Aaron leads you to your old table. The table the two of you practically lived at.

It makes your heart warm and ache all at once. The drink you decided to order isn’t helping matters either.

“So…” You pause, shifting in your seat. “What are you up to these days?”

“You stole my question,” he jokes.

“Tough,” you smile into your drink. “I asked it first.”

He chuckles, but answers anyway. “I’m working for the BAU now.”

“The B-A-What?”

“The-- FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Unit.”

Your eyes widen. “Did you… Did you really just say you’re working for the FBI?”

“I think so,” he says. “I’m the unit chief.”

“You’re the-- Okay. So, you don’t work for the...the BAU, they work for you.”

“We’re a team,” he offers.

“Said every boss ever,” you quip, taking a long drink of your mocha. You take the peppermint stick in between your fingers and stir, eyebrows furrowing down at the swirl of coffee and whipped cream. “So...what do you do exactly?”

He opens his mouth to answer, then stops, hesitating. “Do you really want to know?”

You give him a look. “Of course I do.”

“It’s not great.”

“Aaron, just tell me, or I’ll start reciting my dissertation word for word.” Your statement stuns him to silence, so badly that you almost laugh. “That’s boring. Working for the FBI can’t possibly be boring.”

“Oh, it’s never boring, that’s for sure,” he mutters. “We profile serial killers.”

“You what?”

He laughs. “We look at their behaviors and crimes and build a profile, what they might look like, their age, that stuff.”

“Intriguing.”

“I can’t believe you’re interested.”

“I can’t believe you thought I wouldn’t be,” you counter. “You know I thrive off this stuff.”

“I remember,” he says quietly.

And just like that, you remember, too.

It’s so easy to forget about all the hurt he caused, all the pain he left behind. Especially because you know he never intended to hurt you. He would never do that, not to you, not on purpose. You never told him how you felt. It’s not his fault he couldn’t read your mind.

“Well, you’ve got a doctorate,” he says, shifting the conversation. “What else are you up to?”

“How did you know it’s a doctorate?” You raise an eyebrow. “Are you profiling me? Did I use that correctly?”

“Yes,” he smiles. “And no, not intentionally. You said you’d recite your dissertation. Those are normally written to get doctorate degrees. You always wanted one, I assumed you met your goal.”

“You assume correct,” you nod. “I’m back to start job and apartment hunting, but after the new year. I wanted to spend some time with my mom.”

“How is she doing?”

“She’s good, she--” You pause, shaking your head with a laugh. “She actually brought you up yesterday.”

“Me?” Aaron looks genuinely shocked.

“Yeah, you,” you knock your foot against his leg without thinking, but you pay no mind, not wanting to draw unnecessary attention to it. “She’s actually the one who put the bug in my ear to come here.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I haven’t been back here since…”

It takes him a moment, but he nods slowly. “Right.”

“Yeah,” you draw your legs closer to you on instinct. “But that was a long time ago. How are you and Haley?”

You don’t expect the way his face falls. You glance down at his left hand. No ring.

“We got a divorce a few years ago, split up about a good year before that,” Aaron explains. “She’s good, last I heard. Remarried already.”

“Wow,” you murmur, not knowing what else to say. “What-- I mean, what happened?” When he hesitates, you backpedal. “Sorry, I shouldn’t even ask, it’s probably a sensitive question.”

“It’s okay,” Aaron chuckles. “I don’t mind talking about it with you.”

That sends a dangerous flutter through your stomach. “Okay. Well I’m all ears.”

“Oh, it’s not a long story, it was just my job,” he shrugs. “I took the unit chief position and she was happy at first. But then, there was a period of time where we had what felt like case after case after case.” He shakes his head. “I was barely home, but I was barely in one state for long, anyway. It was a stressful time. We were everywhere at once.”

“That does sound stressful,” you frown. “Has it slowed down now?”

“Kind of, it has its moments,” he admits. “But being gone so much, it took a toll on her. She wanted to start a family, but said she couldn’t do that if I was never there.”

“But I mean she had to have known how your schedule would be with the new job, right?”

“Yeah,” he says, then shrugs. “It’s been so long now that I stopped trying to understand her thought process.”

“I get that,” you say sincerely. You understand not wanting to waste energy on something like that anymore. Sometimes you just have to give it up and have peace with the fact that you’ll never understand.

“What about you?” He asks suddenly, catching you off guard. “Seeing anyone?” He adds it quietly, like he’s shy.

Aaron Hotchner. Shy. Around you.

“Oh,” you nearly laugh at the prospect. “No. No, I’m not. Do you really think I would be if I was moving back in with my mom?”

He laughs, bringing his coffee to his lips. “You have a point there.”

A comforting silence settles over the two of you after that.

You shouldn’t feel slightly giddy that his and Haley’s relationship didn’t work out in the end. You’re over him by now, anyway. But something about being right has you fighting a smile. You smother the urge, though, knowing he probably doesn’t want to hear anyone, let alone you, say, “I told you so.”

You do feel bad for him, genuinely. Divorce is never easy for anyone, and you hate he went through that. Especially like that. Haley knew his work schedule would change. Why would she act supportive if she knew this in advance? Just sits uneasy with you, that’s all.

Of course, you feel that overprotective-best-friend nature coming back to you.

“What plans do you have now that you’re back?” He asks, keeping the conversation up, but you can tell he’s earnest — which makes you smile.

“Nothing, really. My mom and I are getting a Christmas tree later, but that’s all I have on my schedule.” You pause, giving him another look. “We both know you were my only friend in high school. Who do you think I’m going to see while I’m here?”

“Hopefully a lot of me,” he replies easily, smiling around his coffee.

And for once, you don’t hesitate to reply. “I hope so, too, actually. I didn’t think you were still around here. And I really didn’t expect you to be working for the FBI.”

“This might be presumptuous of me, but what are you doing this weekend?” He asks, quickly adding on, “A good friend of mine is hosting a Christmas party for the team, and I’ve basically been threatened to bring a plus one.”

“Threatened, huh?” You raise an eyebrow.

He nods seriously. “They won’t let me inside without one.”

You gasp comically, keeping up the act. “Well you can’t miss the party!”

“I know,” he sighs, propping his head in his hand.

“Well, I guess I’ll just have to come with,” you say, still deadly serious.

But Aaron’s lips split into a grin the same time yours does. “It’s this Saturday.”

“Lucky for you, I’m free.”

He doesn’t stop grinning. “I can pick you up, if you want.”

“Yeah, I’d love that,” you say. “I should probably give you my number, shouldn’t I?”

“I was going to ask,” he admits.

You roll your eyes playfully. “I figured.”

After exchanging numbers, the two of you return to your idle conversations. Only, they’re less idle than they ever have been before.

He vents about still not understanding how people can be capable of the things he sees. How he knows that everyone is capable of unspeakable things, but it’s how they do it that still makes him stumble sometimes. And you try to sympathize, though you know you can’t. But still you tell him not to try to understand.

“You’re a good man,” you say. “You’re not going to understand it because you’re not like them.”

“Thank you,” he whispers. “I know that, consciously. Sometimes it’s good to hear it from someone else.”

Then he tells you it’s your turn, and again, you don’t feel the need to hesitate.

You tell him how you weren’t planning on moving back here at all. But the job market where you were didn’t...fit you, for some reason. You never felt like you belonged, and so maybe that’s why you wanted to come back here.

Because even though you left this place heartbroken, you still felt like you belonged when you were here. You felt like you belonged when you were with him, but you don’t tell him that.

Something tells you he heard it anyway, though. Being a profiler and all. Which you still don’t quite understand, but you’re sure he’ll have plenty of time to tell you in the coming future.

+++

After an hour or two, you decide it’s time for you to head back home. Partly because you need to make some lunch for yourself, and partly because you’ve watched Aaron dismiss at least three phone calls in the last twenty minutes.

But he didn’t say a word each time, so you know he won’t tell you who it is or if he needs to go. It makes your heart warm at the thought that he wants to spend more time with you, but if it’s his job, then he needs to go.

He walks you to your car and you hug him around his neck, unashamedly taking a deep breath of his cologne when you stretch up to wrap your arms around him. He didn’t wear cologne back in high school. But this one smells good.

You mentally prepare yourself on the way home for the amount of questions your mom is no doubt going to ask.

You’re supposed to be going to pick out a tree with her today, which means you were supposed to be home a little earlier than this, which means your mom probably already knows what happened and you won’t even get a chance to explain yourself.

In the end, your prediction was correct.

“How was your peppermint mocha?” You glance over to the couch and find your mom sitting there, idly reading a book.

The question is as directly indirect as they come. You raise an eyebrow and kick the front door closed (yes, she asked before you even stepped foot inside the house). “It was good,” you reply, shrugging your jacket off your shoulders. “Why?”

“Oh, you enjoyed it for almost two hours, so I was just wondering.” Your mom fights back a grin, but she’s not doing a very good job.

You sigh. “Just go ahead and ask.”

She closes her book. “Alright, fine, I will. How is Aaron?”

There it is.

“He’s good,” you answer rather pointedly, making your way into the living room. “He’s working for the FBI now.”

“Oh, I knew that already.”

You plop down next to her on the couch. “Seriously?”

“Of course!” She cries, like it should be obvious. “Small talk happens when you see someone in the store.”

“Right,” you scoff. “Anyway, thanks for not telling me him and Haley divorced.”

She grimaces.

“Yeah, exactly,” you nod at her expression. “That’s how I felt. I bet it was just awesome of me to ask about how him and his ex-wife are doing.”

“I’m sorry,” your mom says. “It completely slipped my mind. It’s been so long since those two split.”

“Why didn’t you tell me when it happened?”

“Because I didn’t want to bring him up,” she answers sincerely. “You seemed like you had really moved on. I figured it didn’t matter, and I didn’t want to make you start thinking about him again when you had finally gotten over it all.”

“Oh,” you murmur. “Well, thank you, then, but...still. I feel like an idiot.”

“Did he seem angry when you asked?”

“No, the opposite,” you sigh. “He explained what happened and I let him talk about it for a second, but he seems mostly moved on from it.”

“I don’t know how he can be,” your mom scoffs. “She’s already remarried, you know.”

“Yeah, he told me.”

Your mom shakes her head. “I should’ve shook some sense into that boy when he came to say goodbye that day.” Then she pauses, poking your leg. “And I should’ve made you say goodbye to him. I’ll never forgive myself for that.”

“I didn’t wanna talk to him,” you shrug. “We barely had all year, anyway. And one goodbye would not have stopped him from going to college and marrying Haley, you know that.”

“Yeah, I know.” She sighs. “It’s fun to think about, though.”

“Well stop thinking about it,” you mutter. “We are friends and he’s probably seeing someone by now. I don’t even know how long I’ll be here, so.”

Your mom raises her eyebrows. “I never said anything about what you guys are now.”

Damn. Caught. “I know, but I’m just...catching you before you do.”

“Mmm, more like catching yourself.”

“Shut up.”

She lightly hits you with a pillow. “Don’t say that to your mother,” she jokes. “Especially not when I’m right and you know it.”

“Yeah, yeah. Are you ready to pick out a tree?”

“Of course,” she replies. “Just let me find my shoes.”

While she’s getting ready -- because “finding her shoes” really means fixing her hair and makeup and changing outfits a couple times -- you get a text from Aaron.

Aaron: It was nice catching up with you today

You smile and type your reply. Ditto. We should do it again sometime.

He doesn’t reply, but you figure he’s busy at work, anyway. And you’ve got a tree to pick out and decorate, so you’re technically busy, too.

You try not to think too much about it.

+++

And truthfully, you don’t think much about it, until Aaron finally replies. It’s hours later when you’re decorating the freshly-cut Christmas tree in the living room, with Michael Bublé’s Christmas album playing through the stereo speakers. It’s just like when you were younger.

You check your phone and see that it’s Aaron texting you back, but you pocket it before reading the message. You’re busy.

Your mom notices the change on your face. “Everything alright?” She asks as she places a snowflake ornament on one of the smaller branches.

You nod without thinking, hating yourself for even feeling what you’re feeling right now. A glittery red ornament hangs from your index finger as you try to find the right branch to hang it on -- and while your mind wanders all over the place.

“Clearly not,” your mom replies. “But alright.” She turns and reaches into a different box, picking up one of the golden jingle bells that she always hides deep within the tree each year. When you were younger, she’d hide them without you seeing, and then on Christmas Eve you’d have to search the tree for them before you could open one present before going to sleep.

You snort a laugh, always loving her way of getting you to open up: sarcasm. “It’s just Aaron.”

“Aaron?”

“Texting me,” you explain, looking down at the glitter coating your fingertips from the ornaments.

“Aren’t you going to reply?” She asks, grabbing another jingle bell.

“Technically he’s the one replying from earlier today.”

“Okay…”

You sigh. Time to cave. “He invited me to a Christmas party this weekend.”

Your mom doesn’t even try to hide her excitement or her wide grin. “Really? That’s great!”

Is it? You want to ask, but you stop yourself. “Yeah,” you shrug. “I guess so. It’ll be nice to hang out with him more.” You pause, finally hanging the small glittery red ornament on the tree that you’ve been idly holding for the past two minutes. “Apparently a friend of his is hosting it and basically told him he wouldn’t be allowed inside without a plus one.” You chuckle quietly, knowing Aaron had to have rolled his eyes when his friend told him that.

“So it’s...a date, then?”

“What? No,” you shake your head. “No, no. Not a date. He didn’t phrase it that way.”

“Sweetheart, plus one implies date.”

“Who says?”

“Everyone!” Your mom laughs. “Bringing a plus one to a wedding is usually a casual date, if not bringing your significant other along.”

“This isn’t a wedding, it’s just a Christmas get together.”

“Same difference.”

“Well, I think you’re doing that thing again where you try to plant seeds in my brain for things that are unnecessary,” you raise an eyebrow at her when she avoids eye contact, so you know you’ve caught her red-handed. “All that aside,” you sigh. “I’m over him. It’s been so long. If something was going to happen, it would have already.”

“Whatever you say,” she shrugs indifferently, grabbing the final jingle bell to hide in the top of the tree. For a brief moment, you wish you hadn’t been watching where she hid them, so you could do the search on Christmas Eve one more time.

+++

You bump into Aaron one more time, two days later, at the same coffee shop.

“Back for more?” He teases as he slides into the seat across from you, another black coffee in his right hand.

You’re sitting at the table the two of you call home with yet another peppermint mocha sitting in front of you and your laptop. More job hunting is the task for today, even though you’re ready to give up and just pick it back up after the New Year. It’s not like your mom is making you pay rent, and you have enough in savings to help with groceries (without her knowledge, of course, because she refuses to let you pay for anything) and buy your own coffees. But, you decided to give it one last go today.

That is, until Aaron slid into the seat in front of you. Now, you close your laptop and place it back in your bag. “Just needed some fuel for more job hunting,” you grin. “What are you doing here?”

“I took off for lunch for once and thought I might find you here.”

“Oh?” You raise your eyebrows. “Were you seeking me out, Hotchner?”

“Maybe a little,” he admits with a shy smile. “Are you still good for tomorrow?”

“As long as you are,” you nod. “What time?”

“I’ll pick you up at five, if that’s good?”

“Perfect,” you smile. “Are you ready to introduce me to your friends?”

“Depends,” he exhales exasperatedly. “Are you ready to meet them?”

“They can’t be that bad.”

“They might be. If you aren’t used to them.” He pauses. “They don’t know you’re coming, by the way.”

“What?” You almost laugh. “Why not?”

“I told them I was bringing someone, but I didn’t feel like hearing it all week about who I was bringing.” He pauses again, like he’s holding something back, and then he lets it out. “They know all about you.”

You blink. “They do?”

“Yeah,” he smiles gently. “I talk about you all the time.”

“No,” you shake your head. “No you don’t. There’s no way.”

“You’ll believe it tomorrow,” he chuckles. “I’m sure they’ll try to embarrass me.”

“I-I mean...what do you even say about me?”

He shrugs. “That you were my best friend in high school and...that I missed you and wondered what you were up to these days, and how we used to hang out here.” He looks around the shop, then back to you and your bewildered expression. “What?” He laughs. “You didn’t talk to your friends about me?”

“No, I did,” you laugh quietly. But I said different things. And most of the time I was crying because I missed you, especially my first year of college when my roommate tried to get me to go on a double date with her boyfriend and his roommate, but I refused and had to confess that I wasn’t over you and that you broke my heart, and I was such a mess that she brought ice cream and chocolate back after their date.

But you don’t say any of that. Obviously.

“I just didn’t expect you to even...think about me, I guess,” you finally spit out, still shaking your head. “I mean...we haven’t talked since high school, I figured you’d forgotten or moved on, at least. Especially since you had Haley.”

Aaron’s expression softens and turns sad, quickly. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs. “I didn’t know you thought any of that.”

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it,” you wave his worry away. “It’s years ago. Water under the bridge.”

“Yeah,” he agrees. Then, he says, “Haley was jealous of you, you know.”

You immediately look up from your mocha, your eyes wide in shock. “She was what?”

“Oh yeah,” Aaron laughs. “Devastatingly jealous of you. She swore we were dating or that I was in love with you or something.”

Or something. “Wow,” you chuckle, trying to mask your hurt as much as possible. “Why did she even think that?”

You know why. You know exactly why. Because before her, you and Aaron were attached at the hip. You sat together during lunch, walked each other home, hung out at the coffee shop, went to school functions together (well, you’d actually go with a big group, but you two always ended up together anyway), and so on and so forth. Anyone would’ve been an idiot to not assume you two were dating.

“We were so close,” he shrugs. “She said she was so surprised when I asked her to be my girlfriend because she swore I was dating you. She actually asked me that, when I gave her the flowers. She said, “What about Y/N?” And I said, “Y/N? She’s just my best friend.” And she didn’t believe me.”

“That’s so crazy,” you say, but you’re really thinking back to that day you and Aaron had decided to meet up here and hang out after so long. When Haley crashed the hangout. When she locked eyes with you and smirked before pulling him back in for another kiss.

She was jealous. She was jealous and she knew exactly what she was doing that day.

Aaron’s phone starts ringing and he sighs heavily, pulling it out. He almost declines it, but then stops himself. “It’s the boss,” he says. “My boss. I’ve gotta take this. I’ll text you later?”

“Sure,” you smile, knowing he might forget or get too busy to think about it. But that’s okay. “Good luck with the phone call.”

“Thanks,” he chuckles. “I’ll need it.” And then he brings his phone up to his ear. “Agent Hotchner,” he says, and you hate that you find it so hot.

+++

You almost cancel with Aaron a dozen times before 2p.m.

You blame the conversation the two of you had yesterday. For some reason, the thought of Haley being jealous of you had never crossed your mind. Because to you, it was so obviously the other way around. Of course, you weren’t vocal about your jealousy, but you were certain she knew. Not that it was the other way around.

Old feelings have already resurfaced, which is bad enough, but the talk about Haley and about how Aaron’s friends know all about you made things worse. Especially the latter.

Why would he talk about you so much if the two of you hadn’t spoken in years? Not even years, but like an entire decade. Why would he still talk about you and think about you that much?

You have dwelled over those questions since he left the coffee shop yesterday.

But now, you have no idea what to wear, and Aaron will be here any minute. You’re assuming the attire is casual, not fancy, since it’s just a get together with his friends -- who all happen to be his team of agents. FBI agents. Because he’s just casually the Unit Chief of the BAU.

It still baffles you. He wanted to be a lawyer. Not in the FBI. God.

He’s still your Aaron. That’s what shocks you the most. He’s experienced law school, marriage, practicing law, working for the FBI, becoming a Unit Chief, divorce, and yet he’s still the Aaron Hotchner you were best friends with in high school.

You wonder if you’re still the girl he was best friends with in high school. Or if you’ve changed so drastically that he doesn’t see you that way anymore.

You take a deep breath, going back to digging through the many boxes of clothes that you have yet to unpack. You need a sweater or something. That’s safe enough, right? It’s too cold for a dress, and frankly, you’re not in the mood for wearing one, anyway.

Finally, you find the sweater you were looking for. You tug it over your head, figuring your jeans are fine enough. You’ll wear some low heels to make it look like you put in a little more effort.

Your quick thinking is to your benefit because the doorbell rings almost as soon as you’re done doing the clasp on your second heel.

But because your mom is quicker than you, she’s already opened the door and let Aaron in before you can make it downstairs. And by the time you are coming down the stairs, Aaron is sitting on the couch with your mom, making idle conversation.

“Hey,” you smile at him, resisting the urge to glare at your mom. “Ready?”

“If you are,” he nods, standing to his feet.

When he turns, you shoot your mom a look. “We’ll be back later.”

“You’re not in high school,” your mom laughs. “You two have fun for as long as you like.”

“I know,” you say. “But I also know you’ll wait up until I get back.”

“And you can’t stop me,” she replies pointedly.

Aaron laughs at the two of you, your banter just as he remembers from all those years ago. Neither of you have changed one bit.

After a final moment of bickering, you bid your mom goodbye and leave with Aaron.

In the car, you ask, “Have you told them about me coming yet?”

From the driver’s seat, he shakes his head. “No, so prepare yourself for a lot of questions.”

“I think you’re the one that’ll be in hot water, but alright,” you chuckle. “I can hear them now. ‘Why didn’t you tell us you were bringing her!’”

He laughs loudly. “That’s not a bad impression, actually.”

“Why, thank you,” you smirk. “It’s a hidden talent of mine.”

“Oh, really?”

“Mhm.”

The two of you share a grin as he keeps driving.

+++

After some time -- long enough that you were beginning to wonder where he’s taking you -- Aaron finally turns into a subdivision. But it’s still not what you were expecting.

You assumed FBI agents must make good money, but not this good. This is a mansion. It’s massive. There has to be at least six bedrooms in there, maybe more.

“Is your friend a millionaire or something?”

Aaron chuckles, “Maybe. Probably. Maybe more.”

“More?” Your eyes widen. “Wow.” And then Aaron pulls into the driveway. “Wow.”

He puts the car in park and says, “Try not to look too surprised. Dave won’t shut up about the house if you get him started.”

“What if I want to hear everything?” You ask, scrambling out of the car to look up at the house. “Jesus Christ.” Then you whip your head around to look at Aaron exasperatedly. “Does your house look like this?”

“No, no,” he shakes his head. “No. This is too big. Dave’s crazy for buying it.”

“He’s definitely insane,” you nod. “I mean, what do you even need a house this big for?”

Aaron shrugs. “Christmas parties, I guess.” He pauses, holding out his arm for you. “Ready to face the lions?”

You roll your eyes through a laugh, loosely holding onto his arm. “Quit being so dramatic. I bet it’ll be just fine.”

“Let’s hope so,” Aaron replies. Because truthfully, he is a little worried that they might scare you off. They have a habit of doing that.

The two of you walk up to the front door, and you try your best to act like you’ve been in the general vicinity of a house this big before. Dave must be a really good friend of Aaron’s, because instead of knocking or ringing the doorbell, Aaron twists the doorknob and walks right in with you on his arm.

“Dave’s making pasta,” Aaron whispers, smelling the air. He shuts the door gently, wanting to surprise the team as much as possible.

You sniff the air, too, smiling happily. “Smells really good. Is that carbonara?”

“Good nose,” a voice says from the kitchen.

“That’s Dave,” Aaron chuckles, walking you down the hall toward the smell.

The team’s eyes all widen dramatically and comically when Aaron Hotchner steps inside the kitchen with a woman on his arm.

“Well, hello,” one of them says, sliding off the stool at the counter to saunter over to you. He’s all suave and swagger.

“Derek Morgan, this is Y/N,” Aaron introduces you quickly, knowing the reaction your name will get.

“Hold up,” Derek pauses, glancing between you and Aaron. “Y/N? As in the Y/N?”

“I don’t know about being the Y/N, but that is my name,” you laugh. “Nice to meet you.”

“The pleasure is all mine,” Derek says, a hand over his heart to add to the sincerity. “Where have you been hiding all this time?”

“Getting a doctorate,” you shrug, only now realizing that your hand is still holding onto Aaron’s arm, but he doesn’t seem fazed by it either, so you don’t move.

“Oh, alright,” Derek chuckles. “Hey Reid, we’ve got another doctor here.”

The man in question, Reid, looks up from the book he was reading with furrowed eyebrows. “Hi.” He waves.

“Hey,” you wave back. “What’re you reading?”

“War and Peace. In Russian, though.”

“In-- Wow, okay.”

“He’s a genius,” Morgan explains.

“I see that,” you chuckle.

Aaron finishes the introductions for you. “That’s JJ, handles the press for us because none of us want to do it.”

“He’s not wrong,” JJ replies with a laugh. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”

“You too,” you smile.

“You met Reid, his first name’s Spencer,” Aaron supplies, and Reid is too far gone in the book again to notice. “This is Emily Prentiss.”

“And I have been dying to meet you,” Emily says. “You are exactly how he described.”

“In a good way, I hope?” You laugh nervously.

She nods. “Definitely.”

Aaron points to the other woman at the counter. She’s dressed in all sorts of crazy colors with glasses that match her outfit. And before he can introduce her, she says, “I’m Penelope Garcia, technology extraordinaire. I keep them out of trouble.”

“And we love you for it,” Derek adds.

“And this is Dave,” Aaron finishes.

“It is very nice to finally meet you,” Dave says, and actually shakes your hand. “Do you know how to make carbonara?”

“Yes, actually,” you say, earning a surprised look from Aaron. “I went through a phase when I was younger, wanting to make anything and everything that sounded good, so I’ve made this a few times. My mom loves it.”

Dave loves the sound of that. “Would you like to help me?”

You practically light up inside and out. “Seriously? I’d love to!”

“Oh, here we go,” Derek groans. “He’s roped her in.”

You ignore him, slipping away from Aaron to grab the other apron off the hook by the entrance to the kitchen. You slide your head through the loop and tie it at the back in a matter of seconds, too excited to contain it.

“I almost went to culinary school, you know,” you say to no one in particular, but Aaron is listening, and so is Dave.

“Why didn’t you?” Aaron asks.

You shrug. “Didn’t seem practical.” Which isn’t the real answer at all. The real answer is you got your heart broken and needed to do a complete 180 in life, so you did. Culinary school was out. Getting a doctorate was in. You turn on the water in the sink and begin washing your hands. “What do you need me to do?”

For the next hour, you help Dave make the carbonara, occasionally answering any questions Aaron’s friends have for you.

Aaron pours you a glass of wine and sits at the counter, watching you cook. You look more at peace than he’s seen you since a few days ago when he first bumped into you again.

You catch him looking at you more than a handful of times. It feels good. Spending the evening with his friends, his team, with him. You’ve missed spending time with him more than anything else.

Dave serves up the carbonara, telling you to sit down since you helped so much already. You don’t make him ask twice.

+++

After dinner, everyone moves into the living room, scattering on the various couches and chairs. Reid has finished reading War and Peace, so the book sits discarded on one of the coffee tables.

You take the spot on the couch next to Aaron, careful not to spill your wine. Penelope sits on the other side of you, with Derek on her other side, which all but forces you to move closer to Aaron, and something about the look on Penelope’s face tells you it was done on purpose.

You’re not exactly complaining, though. With a full stomach and a fresh glass of wine, Aaron’s presence is even warmer than before. You pay no mind when he shifts his left arm, stretching it over the back of the couch and allowing you to scoot closer, your legs pressed against each other’s.

The conversation continues, and somehow the subject of relationships is brought up.

“Yeah, why was I the only one asked to bring someone?” Aaron asks. “I’d like to see all of you find a last minute date.”

Another warm rush goes through your body at the word date. This is a date. Alright then.

“I think you did just fine,” Dave says, nodding to you. “Don’t you?”

You shrug, not sure of what to make of it. “I’m having fun, so I guess so.”

“See?” Dave gives Aaron a look. “You did fine.”

Aaron gives his friend a tired glare. “Only because she happened to be back from getting her degrees. Otherwise, I would’ve been stuck.”

“Nah, man, you could’ve called Beth.”

You feel Aaron tense next to you, but you aren’t sure if he tensed up or if you did. Maybe both. Probably both. You weren’t aware there was someone else.

“Who’s Beth?” You ask as casually as possible, ignoring the heated glares Penelope, JJ, and Emily alike are sending Derek. Seriously, Derek would be dead three times over right now if looks could be deadly.

Aaron shrugs before answering you. “Her and I dated briefly last year.”

You nod slowly, trying not to seem hurt or upset or anything by this because it’s ridiculous of you to be fighting back tears, but you can’t help it.

It’s high school, goddamnit, it’s fucking high school all over again.

The topic of conversation shifts thanks to Reid being the endless supplier of random facts. One question about Russian from Emily and he’s taking over, washing the awkwardness away in two languages.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t work as well for you as it does for everyone else.

You set your wine glass down on the table and tell Penelope you’re going to use the bathroom. You have no clue where it is, but she doesn’t know that.

Aaron does. And Aaron hears the tone of voice you use.

He waits until you’re down the hall before he stands to follow you, foregoing any explanation to his friends. They already know what he’s doing.

Aaron’s suspicions are correct when he hears the front door close and sees your coat no longer hanging next to his on the hook by the door. He grabs his and only gets one arm through a sleeve before he’s opening the door, eyes searching the premises for you.

Thankfully, he finds you after two seconds, and his racing heart slows a little. You’re standing by the reindeer lights on Dave’s front lawn. Your coat is only hanging on your shoulders, something you’ve always done since high school when you were upset.

“It feels more like a blanket,” you had told him one day. “Blankets are more comforting than jackets.”

He doesn’t see the difference, but you do, and that was enough for him.

He has both arms through the sleeves by the time he’s next to you. He gently touches your arm to get your attention, adding a soft, “Hey,” for good measure.

You turn your head at the sound, having already known he was coming because you heard the front door open. In the back of your mind, you had wanted him to follow you out here, but now that he’s done it, you aren’t so sure this is what you wanted.

You wanted to ignore the feeling. Get it to disappear on its own. Survive the night, then never talk to him again. You were heartbroken, but it was better when you weren’t speaking to him. At least, that’s what you tell yourself.

“I’m sorry,” Aaron says softly. “Beth and I haven’t spoken since our last date a year ago. It was only three dates. We weren’t serious at all.” He pauses. “I have no idea why Derek said that. He doesn’t think before he speaks sometimes.”

You nod, not having it in you to laugh at Aaron’s small jab, even though he is entirely correct. Derek is a quick thinker with a sharp wit, but you can see how it might backfire sometimes. Like tonight.

You believe Aaron, you really do. But it’s so hard. “Did you love her?”

Aaron is stunned for a moment, but says, “No. I don’t think I did.”

“Okay.” You shake your head, looking down at the grass. “I’m just trying to figure out why Derek would’ve brought her up if...if you guys dated so briefly.”

Aaron sighs. “I don’t know.”

“And is this a date?” You blurt, finally finding the courage to get that one out. “Because if it is, I…I don’t know.”

“Don’t know what?”

You shake your head again, trying to find the right words, but they always seem out of reach. “Just...tell me this won’t be like high school.”

This time Aaron is too stunned to form a real answer. “What?”

“Please,” you sound like you’re about to cry and you feel so pathetic that you wish you had never agreed to come tonight. But you’re here anyway. “I was in love with you then, and I’m still in love with you now, but I can’t do that again. So if this is a just friends thing and always will be, I need you to tell me before I hurt myself all over again.”

Aaron can’t believe his ears. He swears he heard you wrong. He must have. “You were in love with me in high school, too?”

“Yes-- Wait, too? What do you mean too?” Now you’re looking at him, eyes wide in confusion, shock, every emotion possible. “Too?”

“I was in love with you, Y/N,” he chuckles, reaching for your hands. “I thought you just saw me as an older brother. That’s why I never...said anything.”

“What?” You breathe, letting him thread his fingers through yours. “Are you serious? You better not be pulling my leg, Hotchner. Don’t do that to me.” You tug on his hands for emphasis, giving him a stern look.

“I’m not joking,” he says, taking a step closer. “I wouldn’t joke about this.”

“Oh my god,” you say, disbelief a powerful thief of words. “I can’t believe… So you went after Haley because…”

“Because I heard from one of her friends that she had a crush on me,” he admits. “I did love her, but not as much as I loved you. Never as much as I loved you.”

You don’t know what else to do or say. He looks so beautiful in this light that it hurts, and now he’s saying words you never thought you’d ever hear.

“Do you forgive me?” He asks. “For breaking your heart?”

“Only if you forgive me for breaking yours,” you whisper.

He shakes his head. “I broke my own. I should’ve told you how I felt.” He pauses. “I even talked to you about Haley all the time. Is that why you didn’t say goodbye to me?”

You nod. “It sounds so stupid now, but I was so hurt.”

“I’m an idiot,” he laughs. “I’m the dumbest fool to ever walk the Earth.”

“We both are,” you correct him, taking a step closer. It’s cold out here, but he’s warm. He’s always been so warm. Like home.

And you-- you’ve always been who Aaron thinks of when he thinks about being happy. It’s always been you. A moment like this, and a thousand others. He wants them all. And to think, you do too.

His lips meet yours in a long-awaited kiss, cold noses bumping against one another, his warm hands holding your face, your chilled fingers finding their home on his neck, stealing his warmth.

From the window, the team watches, and Emily exchanges money with Derek.

[1994sunflower]

Can you just make something really fluffy of just her hanging out with Ashton and Calum while Micheal is busy or something. Like just siblings love because I could use some nice fluff from my favorite writer at this point. Pretty please. If not it's totally chill. ( Heaven to you)

so so cute, I really liked exploring this friendship. hope you like it!

in which you spend some time with calum and ashton

“I’m serious Michael.” You kept pushing him away from you. Tapping the textbook on his lap, “You need to study, you’re going to fail the class if you don’t pass this exam.”

Michael groaned, “It’s a fucking elective, it’s not like I need it to graduate.”

He’d been trying to avoid the studying he denied needing (but knew he did). You were doing your best to not be distracting. You studied yourself, scrolled on your phone, never once speaking to him lest you take his attention away.

But his eyes always seemed to eventually trail over to your small figure laying on his bed after a long time of staring blankly at the book in front of him. Sometimes he would ask you what you were doing, claiming he was taking a break. Other times he would try to kiss you and start something you knew would definitely just destroy his concentration on classwork. He was just a natural procrastinator.

You pushed him away each time, no matter how sweetly he approached you or how innocent his words seemed. You knew his tricks. And frankly, you were worried you might be too weak to resist him if you let him get any closer.

“That’s right. It’s an elective you chose, so you have to study for it. I know you’ll do fine if you’d just actually try.” You’d made your mind up already on what the solution to the problem was. Because apparently it was you, he couldn’t concentrate with you in the room. You got up from his bed, taking your phone and his with you. No distractions. “I’ll come back when you’ve actually finished studying.”

“Wha-” Michael moved to grab your wrist but you moved out of the way quickly. “Are you serious?”

“Yes. You study or I’ll leave altogether. You’re going to pass this class.” You smiled at him, just to show him just how much you believed and cared about him. You were doing this for his own good. “I’ll be outside when you’re done.”

“What are you even going to do all alone?” Michael called out, turned away completely from his book as he stared at you with disbelieving eyes. You’d always ended up going along with his attempts of distractions before, you’d never actually gone this far to make him study. Not when your absence was likely the biggest punishment his girlfriend could inflict.

You huffed, stepping out of his room, “Worry about what you’re going to do in this room, Michael Clifford.”

You full named him. Michael groaned heavily as he rested his forehead against his desk, that was how he knew you were serious. And he had nothing to do but dreadfully start learning about a subject he didn’t even care about and barely understood during the little lectures he did attend. Because no matter how docile you may appear and how intimidating he may seem to everyone else, his small girlfriend was truly the only one who would ever be able to tell him what to do. He’s wrapped around your finger.

-

The house was lit up for once and you could see Ashton wrestling with the control in his hands, completely immersed in whatever war game was on in the television. Calum was sitting on the opposite side of the couch, glancing up at the screen every so often. But his attention was almost completely on the laptop on his lap. At least one of the people in that house tried to do his school work.

You stepped out hesitantly. You already missed the comfort of your boyfriend’s presence. It might’ve been a punishment for both of you. But it was for his best. So you sighed and moved forward nonetheless. You always felt equally as safe and more than happy in Ashton and Calum’s presence.

“What are you two doing?” You asked as you took a seat next to Ashton. Your movements were confident, like second nature because they never made you feel like you were intruding.

Ashton’s only acknowledgement of you was a nudge but Calum looked up from his screen and smiled at you. It hadn’t been long since you could say you barely knew him, compared to your relationship Ashton. But you were glad that your friendship had evolved and you felt a lot closer to him, a lot more comfortable and friendly.

Calum gestured to his screen which you couldn’t see, “Well, I’m doing my work unlike other people.”

Ashton was just able to let go of the controller with one hand to be able to flip Calum off before going back to handling it with two. The multitasking was honestly impressive.

“At least someone in this house is being a good student.” You muttered, placing Michael’s phone on your lap as you leaned back on the couch. A sigh left your lips as if all your attempts with Michael had left you exhausted.

“I’m sorry.” Ashton glanced at you and only then did you realize he had paused his game, “Are you insinuating that I’m not a good student?”

“I’m ‘insinuating’ that I didn’t know you knew big words.”

“Fuck you, Hood.”

Your giggles were the only thing that stopped Ashton from some saying some very select words to Calum. A smile formed on his lips without him even thinking about it. It was hard to repress, your happiness was contagious. He understood why Michael always talked about your goodness.

“Where’s Michael anyway?” Ashton asked, his tone already teasing. “I was wondering when you’d get sick of being around each other 24/7.”

“Hey!” You slapped his arm in faux-anger. To which he laughed promptly, ruffling your hair dismissively enough for you to swat at him again.

Your attempt to get your hair back to normal was useless until Calum decided to move forward and place the pieces of hair back in place for you. You sat perfectly still as he did. They were always gentle with you. Sometimes you wondered if they thought you would break otherwise, you looked dainty but you’d gotten used to Michael’s manhandling, not being held back by that.

“For your information, he’s studying too. So it seems you’re the only one who isn’t, Ash.”

Ashton eyed you up and down, “I don’t see a book in your hands.”

You glared up at him but to both he and Calum, you looked a little less threatening than a Chihuahua. So they did nothing but smirk back down at you until you huffed out and crossed your arms.

Calum closed his laptop, his attention evidently no longer being held by it. “So you’re just going to wait until he’s done?”

Ashton scoffed, “As if he’s actually studying. Sorry to tell you, Y/N, but you’re giving him way too much credit.”

You looked so offended at his words that both of them wordlessly burst out laughing. Ashton shook his head, his grin so big you could see his dimples as he held out the control in his hands to you.

“Here. While you wait the whole 10 minutes he’ll pretend to be studying, you can play with us.”

Ashton was serious about his games. Only letting a select few friends ever even pick up one of his controllers. It was a privilege for only the people he liked the most. One he was giving you and you beamed with pride. You took the controller from his hand.

Calum took the other one left abandoned on the floor. “I’m not going to go easy on you.”

You stuck your tongue out at him, feeling utterly too confident for someone who could barely hold the controller correctly. “You’re going down, frat boy.”

Calum let out a surprised laugh. It was so easy to forget who exactly he was associated with when he was so different from all the frat boys you’d ever known. You were grateful he was, because otherwise you’d never feel comfortable with him. And certainly never develop the close friendship you had with him.

Ashton was kind enough to change the game, knowing you weren’t fond of war, even depictions of it. How ironic for a girl who was dating a guy that seemed to bring the spirit of war anytime he got pissed off. He didn’t ask but you felt happy that he knew you enough to think of your preferences.

It was sweet. The way they took the time to remind you what exactly the keys did (Ashton reminding you for the nth time since the first time you taught you).

“You’ll do fine.” Calum waved dismissively, leaning back on the couch. His laptop long forgotten next to him. “But not better than me.”

When the game finally started, it was a slow start. Mostly because you were trying to get into the rhythm of things and Calum slowed down too, allowing you to adjust. They both watched you carefully, nodding when you were hesitant about pressing a button. Even giving you words of encouragement when you actually did well in the game. Or when your calm demeanor sent a wave of enjoyment through the three of you.

“I think we like you more than Michael.”

“Yeah, you better.”

Your grin and giggles was genuine. You were having fun. Even without Michael there. While any other time you’d be just counting down the time until you could get back to him. Good thing his friends, your friends as well, were so hospitable and nice to be around. That they included you and they liked you. It sure meant a lot to Michael anyway that the people closest to him cared for you and looked after you even when he wasn’t there.

Truthfully, they weren’t the type of guys you would’ve befriended if you hadn’t dated Michael; you were too shy and they were too outgoing and friendly. You would’ve been too hesitant to even try to go into their world or group, you would’ve been too awkward and nervous. But despite that, you felt perfectly comfortable in their presence. And you were glad they were your friends.

Ashton helped you a lot during the game. His gaze would be completely on the screen as he watched you and Calum play but his hands hovered over yours. His fingers sometimes clicking buttons for you that you never would have known to press otherwise. Other times, completely moving your fingers as if he was playing through your hands. You didn’t mind, in fact you preferred it when he helped. It was when you started winning.

His face was focused, serious as it always was when he was playing and it was kind of amusing to glance at, especially because technically, he wasn’t playing.

Calum didn’t call you out for cheating even though having Ashton help you technically was exactly that. It wasn’t that he wasn’t aware. It was pretty obvious, Ashton did nothing to hide it. And even if he did, it was kind of hard to not at least be suspicious when your sloppy gaming suddenly got much better and you started to win. But for your sake, Calum pretended to be oblivious.

Truth was, you sucked. But if anyone ever even tried saying that to you, they’d be asking for a death wish. Especially when you looked so content just to be involved, you trying your best. And that was what mattered to them.

It was subtle when Calum began to ease up on his playing. You didn’t notice. Not even when the game that was so close beforehand started to go overwhelmingly in your favor. Just like that Calum let you win. Even if he was known to be competitive. He could put that aside for his dear friend.

You squealed out in happiness, dropping the controller on the sofa as your arms went up in celebration. “Ash!! Did you see that?”

Ashton locked eyes with your excited one and nodded, his own arms mimicking yours and wooping in celebration. Your high fives were probably too many given that it was a video game you won by cheating half of the time and had been allowed to win. But his smile was large and his laugh was genuine.

He turned to Calum, both hands flipping him off in good humor while you placed your hands on Ashton’s shoulders, just enough to be able to look past him above his head to Calum.

You stuck your tongue out at him in the way that was not very sportsmanlike but very cute, so he couldn’t be mad. “Told you I’d win.”

Then you shrieked when Calum pulled your from your seat. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders enough to have you leaning forward from the weight. He wasn’t as big as Michael but he certainly rose up much taller than you. “Yeah, yeah. Good luck trying to beat me again.”

You were laughing along with him, looking up at the amused boy but you couldn’t respond. Michael’s door was flung open before you could. You hadn’t realized how loud the three of you were being.

“If I’m being forced to study could you two at least shut the fuck up so I can concentrate.” He didn’t leave his room, his head just peeking out of his doorway. He was as daunting as always, his face serious and close to emotionless. His words harsh. But if he wanted to be intimidating, it was a shame his demeanor didn’t effect the room filled with the closest people in his life.

Michael’s eyes softened when he spotted you in Calum’s arms. Obviously he hadn’t been talking to you, he never would be so brash with you. Especially when you looked at him with those eyes that said you could do no wrong. But he also hadn’t expected you to be participating in making the noise with his rowdy friends. His voice was markedly nicer, “Oh…what are you doing?”

“What we get yelled at but she doesn’t?” Ashton scoffed.

You smiled sweetly at Michael, knowing that he could never get mad at you. Your nose crinkled slightly from pride, “I just beat Cal at a game.”

Calum placed a hand on the top of your head, “She got lucky. But she’s actually pretty good.”

“She’s a natural.” Ashton interrupted, even if his words were a bit of an exaggeration, you still raised up on your tiptoes for a second at the praise. Ashton’s eyes held a mischief to them. “One of us just might steal her from you, I think she likes us better anyway.”

If it was anyone else that dared utter those words, you were sure the result would be much different. You could imagine the way Michael’s eyes would shut down in anger, the way his body would tense up and his knuckles would be ready to meet bone. They’d be on the ground bleeding, almost as quickly as the words would leave someone’s mouth. The same went if anyone else put their hands on you like Calum was currently doing.

But it was his best friend. Someone he trusted, cared for and most importantly, he knew cared and respected you as well. He knew his friends’ flirty comments were just talk, just to rile him up. So he did nothing but roll his eyes. “Don’t make me have to beat your ass. Just fucking try it.”

But his words were all bark, no bite. They couldn’t be when he was saying it to Ashton when he knew there was no real problem and when you looked so amused, no discomfort at all. Ashton and Calum were flirty with you before, only when Michael was around and only to get a reaction out of him. You never felt uncomfortable, they always respected boundaries and you had begun to enjoy seeing their friendship with your boyfriend.

Michael struggled with being friendly. But it was almost fascinating and sweet to see him enjoy himself with Ashton and Calum, play around with them like any other guy. Not like the angry, mean guy others saw him as. Even when it came to you, when it would otherwise be when he was most on edge and terrifying. It was a big part of why you felt so safe and secure in Ashton and Calum’s presence as well, because Michael seemed the same way and his trust wasn’t easily won.

Your boyfriend turned around after that and went back in his room. Muttering under his breath, not happy that he had to leave the fun and get back to studying. But you watched him o silently, a small smile on your face as he was actually responsible for once.

In truth, Michael was happy you got along so well. That he could leave you with them and be sure that they’d entertain you, keep you comfortable and safe when he wasn’t around. That you saw in his friends the same thing he did, that you liked them and didn’t mind spending time with them. Even with how different they were from you. They didn’t make you feel uncomfortable.

Even then, you found a way to connect with them to the point where he would find you laughing with them, that you’d hug them as a greeting or goodbye, could hang out with them on your own accord. Not being forced to just to make him happy to see his loved ones together.

It just went to show him, once again, how perfect his little girlfriend was. Everyone felt happy with you around, you embodied that happiness, it was impossible not to feel it. You were just so good. And it wasn’t just in his head, a side effect of the love he felt for you, that was proven when he saw the way Ashton and Calum succumbed to your goodness as well. They were powerless not to.

He couldn’t be prouder.