#meta: the blacklist
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I wish there was meta about Red growing up during the cold war and how growing up Red didnât have the vocabulary to address who he was.
(As I understand it, Red prefers to answer to he/him but also the show doesn't clarify this.)
I can only imagine it hadnât helped the way he grew up it made it almost impossible to figure himself out.
Dom scripted Redâs life from the moment he could walk. He was the âson he always wantedâ. And yet when he did become the son, Dom was furious with Red.
And at every opportunity mentioned how Red killed Katarina, and loved Katarina. Even on his deathbed.
But Red loved Dom despite everything he put Red through.
Itâs no wonder Red is so deeply reluctant to tell Liz even if it would help everything, like for example when Tatiana claimed she was Katarina, Lizâs mother. Starting a rift and Liz (again) going against Red but in such a way that it cost Red his father and Anne.
I donât know if Red was even conscious of how terrified he was that one of the reasons he hasnât told Liz was because he was afraid Liz would reject him the way Dom did constantly.
This fear is at cross purposes with Lizâs need to find out who Red is to her.
Liz was adopted, and despite all of Redâs intentions she did remember being abandoned. Sam was her dad despite his flaws and she accepted them and loved him and since Sam died Lizâs desire to know more of her past, who Red is to her grew.
The moments when Liz was at peace and happily working with Red was when she thought she knew who Red was: her bio dad, or when she thought Red was Ilya (Redâs childhood friend who once posed as Reddington).
The worst moments of their relationships is when Liz didnât know who Red was, or when fake!Katarina entered the picture.
It would have been far easier maybe if Red accepted the title and role of âfatherâ. But being a father is a loaded one for Red, due to so many things starting with Dom and ending with Redâs guilt over Original Reddingtonâs death and the role Red played in that.
To Red Lizâs fathers were: Original Reddington, Constantin Rostova, and Sam. He isnât part of the list.
The only real thing Katarina ever had in a life full of life was Masha and being Mashaâs mother.
And I think that might be a key to Redâs block because Red didnât want to be called Lizâs dad.
Red wants Liz to call him mother.
But how does Red reconcile that to himself? Becoming Reddington was a necessity but Red found freedom and happiness being Raymond Reddington. He was a better Reddington than the Original Reddington.
He celebrated life and for the first time in his whole life when he became Reddington he was no longer anyoneâs puppet. Slowly in his role, he discovered who he was at last. Red found out what he liked and disliked, who he liked and disliked. Who he was attracted to and who he wasnât attracted to.
What food he loved and hated. The clothes he liked remained similar in that Red still loved tailored clothes, and liked being put together.
He finally had an appetite and zest for life and that was missing growing up.
Itâs why as much as he can, he will never deny himself anything he wanted again.
But also after all these years, Red realized he loved his younger self. He loved Katarina and missed her, and would in times of crisis have an imaginary talks with her.
He is often his own counsel. Sometimes, unwisely he subjects himself to Domâs advice which only ends up making him feel worse.
I wish we knew what happened to Redâs mother after she was sent away for her own protection. I wonder if Redâs mother even knew? or I wonder if she wasnât told because, of all people her opinion is the one Red valued the most?
So again that left Red with himself and his complicated thoughts about not wanting to be called âfatherâ and not knowing how to feel about still wanting to be called Lizâs mother.
(Although, again this is not clear or textually maybe Red prefers to be just called Red or considered as a parent. This is one of the things the show doesn't clarify and played more ambiguous).
Who was Red going to talk to? Maybe Kate? But even before there was a distance between Kate and Red, and a power imbalance.
Dembe seems to be the only one who has Redâs total confidence still there is the power imbalance.
Red isnât also the type to discuss matters of gender and sexuality when it pertains to himself. He can talk about anyone elseâs.
Ivan and Ilya are also Cold war era guys who are as clueless.
But Tatiana Petrova, who Dom and Ilya sent out to die claiming she was Katarina but lived, knew. Or had enough of an inkling that when Tatiana discovered who Red really was, Tatiana was able to flaunt to Red that she could be Lizâs mother and Liz would believe and choose Tatiana over Red because Liz thought Tatiana was her mother.
The way Red looked at that taunt was because Tatiana knew Red won't tell Liz who he really is to her. The way it did alienate Liz from Red and how that triggered events that led to Nachalo (8x21).
It would just be so much easier to tell Liz at that point.
But even in this imaginary simulacrum of Katarina, she was shaky and terrified breath as Red and Katarina are finally asked this question. "Who became Reddington?"
And Red stalled and stalled and stalled. Telling Liz he would give the letter her mother wrote to her explaining everything after Liz killed him in a public spectacle so she could take over his empire.
For a smart man with brilliant plans, Red also has some stupid ones, and this was one of them.
Because how did he think it would go over??? Liz already accidentally killed her bio dad, and now she would accidentally on purpose kill her bio mother?
Red was doing suicide by Liz, seemingly forgotten what he told himself years ago when he talked himself out of suicide:
"--Every suicide. Every single one. Is an act of terror âperpetrated against everyone who's ever known you⌠Everyone who's ever loved you. The people closest to you⌠the ones who cherish you⌠are the ones who suffer the most pain, the most damage. Why would you do that?"
I know he thought it was the only way to keep Liz and his granddaughter safe, but at what cost?
And then his worst fear came true.
"I am her mother. And I am death to her."
The one thing Red dedicated his entire life to preventing. Liz/Masha dying in his arms, with all certainty knowing it was his fault.
And she died with Red unable to tell her, even though she did figure it out in death. Red didn't say it out loud to her, the one thing she's been wanting to know from him since they first met.
And he wasn't even able to tell his daughter who he really is to her.
(Also I was watching a scene in season 4 where Liz was reading Katarina's journal and Liz imagined reaching out to Katarina's hand and asking her where she was.
Imaginary Katarina vanished at the moment the door opened and Red entered).
/edited.
(I apologize for any errors in this post, and I welcome any input!)
#tv: the blacklist#meta: the blacklist#meta: raymond reddington#character analysis#elizabeth keen#mothers and daughters#the complexities of identity and gender#blacklist spoilers up to season 8#long post
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actual scene as it happened in the show
#gos2spoilers#spoilers#good omens#good omens spoilers#hopefully i tagged enough for blacklists#ransart#everyone is typing up beautiful meta analyses and painting beautiful art and i'm here like...#thinking non stop about this part LOL#i just love it; how many does he have? how long is the cooldown period for this 9th level cleric spell#no want sad; only fun
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Last discoursepost for the time being: having looked through the blogs of several GFM vetters, I am increasingly convinced that they are almost all who they say they are, and I regret implying that any of them are run by scammers. I've deleted or turned off reblogs on 3 posts that do so.
I still think it's clear that their vetting process is fallible and has resulted in money going to scammers, but I think this is because they are attempting a task that is too big for the resources they can throw at it and mistakes are inevitable. They are working through a desperate situation doing the best they can, and while I don't think this means you should blindly trust their judgements, it does mean they deserve more grace than I initially gave them.
I wrote out my overall opinion on the situation here and I stand by it.
#blog meta: i say dumb shit when i am angry and it is a character flaw. happened multiple times now#if i want to keep using this account i need to stop doing it. can just wait for the next day and take a more measured approach#blacklist#discourse
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Who would be the first to confess? Or the first to realize their feelings?
Iâm of two minds on this. In my experience, the more common concept is âShadow falls first, Amy falls harder.â This Twitter thread sums up the trope very well:
[Image ID: a screenshot of a tweet by user absolutesilly on April 17th, 2023 that reads, âitâs important to me that the âA fell first, B fell harderâ trope ISNâT about B loving A more. itâs about A spending a long time just getting used to having this (seemingly) hopeless pining going on in the background 24/7, while B is just. hit by a truck with it all of a sudden.
fell first: been suppressing their emotions for so long that itâs like white noise to them. always there but mostly manageable. a bruise that only hurts when you press on it
fell harder: if We Donât Get Married Tomorrow Iâm Gonna Start Biting Peopleâ /.End ID]
And I donât think I even have to clarify which oneâs which. Shadowâs love is quiet and intense. Heâs loyal and devoted. His affection is usually of the slow-burn variety. He hasnât had any canonical crushes so far, but you can see it in his familial/platonic love for those he cares about. Itâs natural to assume romance would be the same way.
And falling hard and fast is what Amy does. Need I mention Sonic? And her desire for marriage?
âShadow has a crush on Amy for months/years until he suddenly sweeps her off her feetâ is common for a reason. Iâve written plenty of it myself, including multiple WIPs. It was how I saw these two for a very long time, and thereâs no denying that itâs compelling and in-character. If I were writing a shadamy-esque relationship in a movie, Iâd write them that way.
HOWEVER...
I donât think game canon is following that trajectory.
Under the cut: lots of ranting and images/hints, both old and new. Youâll recognize a lot of this if youâve read my meta analysis posts, particularly why I ship them, how theyâd resolve their arguments, and my feelings on TMOSTH. Thereâs a tl;dr and relevant headcanon at the end.
In my opinion, âAmy falls for Shadow laterâ doesnât quite jive with canon because I think thereâs ample evidence to suggest she already has a crush on him. Itâs not as strong or obvious as the one she has on Sonic yet, but itâs there, just a little. To make a long story short:
She doesnât look at someone like this...
[Shadow the Hedgehog 2005]
unless she has a crush on them:
[Sonic CD]
She doesnât go out of her way to seek someone out this fervently...
[Sonic Battle]
...unless she has a crush on them:
[Sonic X]
She doesnât insist on bringing someone along like this...
[The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog]
unless she has a crush on them:
Wallpaper posted on Sonic Channel 2/22/21. Art by Yuji Uekawa
One fun aspect of all of this is that the social media team seems to agree with me and keeps noticeably leaning into it. The Twitter Takeovers obviously arenât canon and Iâm not putting those in the âevidenceâ pile, but itâs cute how they keep having Amy act flustered about her feelings regarding him, and itâs definitely not something Iâm imagining this time. Itâs most obvious at 18:14 here:
youtube
The gushing, the stuttering...itâs obvious what theyâre implying. Cindy Robinsonâs very convincing at sounding smitten with him, which isnât surprising considering her feelings on shadamy:
The question before that one in the Takeover arguably counts, too, and the social media team was primarily in charge of The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog, after all. This is consistent for them. There are plenty of other bits and pieces from them and the not-so-subtle marketing team these days, but Iâd be ranting like a conspiracist and hunting down links all day if I got started on those.
^ Me at 2am.
I bring this up not just because itâs fun, but also to prove Iâm not the only one who sees it. Itâs definitely there, and it always makes me wonder what wouldâve happened if sheâd met Shadow first instead of Sonic. Would her little crush on Shadow have become the primary one if heâd entered her life first? Would we see this kind of thing all the time if Shadow were the protagonist?
[IDW issue 59]
Yes
Weâll never know, I guess! đ
Regardless, she met Sonic first, so her attention is...divided. Sheâs usually in-tune with her emotions, so even though her outlook on love is tinted somewhat by hero worship, I do think sheâd figure out she had feelings for Shadow if her crush on Sonic were sidelined. As she got to know him better, sheâd find even more things to love about him, and before long, sheâd be hooked.
For Shadowâs part, itâs pretty clear to anyone whoâs paying attention that he has a soft spot for her of some kind. In my experience, even non-shadamy fans will usually agree with this if asked. And why wouldnât they?
1. He let her hug him and see him cry in SA2, then saved the world because she asked him to. Thereâs a reason fans hate it whenever Amyâs elevator speech at the end of SA2 is put in someone elseâs mouth. Itâs just not believable that heâd save the world for anyone else--not Sonic, not Chris Thorndyke--because the gentleness isnât there for anyone but her. That had to be built and proven.
2. She inspired yet another heel-turn of his in the conspicuously-named âMiracle of Loveâ route in ShTH where âbad boyâ Shadow ditches Black Doom to help her, resulting in a hero classification.
I think we undersell how big of a deal this is. For those who arenât too familiar with Shadow the Hedgehog (2005), that story route starts out with Shadow ignoring Sonic and...*checks notes*...defeating fifty G.U.N. soldiers? The mission says âdefeat,â not âkill.â But Black Doom says âfinish off those soldiers,â âdestroy them all,â âexterminate,â and âannihilate.â In a game where youâre explicitly encouraged to use firearms. On human soldiers. So this Shadow quite possibly has a significant body count by the end of the level, and then he immediately snubs Rouge to destroy Earthâs digital highway system. Thereâs a reason he canât get a hero ending past that point if he doesnât help Amy. Just like in SA2, sheâs the only one left who can turn him into a hero. She speedruns his redemption with one jaunt through a haunted castle. This is the sequence:
[Source]
The way he trails off at, âI didnât have any reason to help her, but since I was looking for the doctor anyway, I figured...â stands out, like heâd forgotten how good of a person he can be.
This brief Twitter thread summarizes the events in a much funnier way than I can:
3. The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog is the most recent and blatant example. Goes to a party. Dresses up in a silly outfit. Embarrasses himself to get her a thoughtful gift. Agrees to go to a concert for a band he canât stand just to make her happy. I donât think I even need to explain this one, but if you want to see me do so anyway, hereâs that link again.
4. In Team Sonic Racing, heâs sweet to her when theyâre on the same team...
...and heâs borderline flirtatious when theyâre on opposing teams. ;)
His lines are delivered in a snarky, teasing way, especially when he calls her cute, and sheâs matching that competitive banter.
[Source: this Twitter thread by MeliCross22:
Absolutely worth a read, and it includes links to the lines so you can actually hear them.]
The question is whether his soft spot is romantic in nature, and as biased as I am...I donât buy it. In the first two, sheâs just reminding him of who he is by calling to mind his memories of Maria, and âMiracle of Loveâ isnât meant in a romantic way. Likewise, in TMOSTH, itâs extremely sweet of him and he wouldnât do that for anyone else, but itâs still not inherently romantic. TSR is less cut-and-dried. It could be flirtation, but it could also just be the race stoking their competitive spirits. Itâs also just a side game, and while itâs still canon, I donât know if Sega would put that kind of dynamic between them in the main series. It could be a case of the TSR writers being secret shadamy fans who are tossing us crumbs, but it could also just be them mixing it up so there isnât yet another instance of Amy saying variations of âSorry, but Iâm in it to win it!â every time she hits someone with an item. Trust me, it gets old.
Canonically, I donât see Shadow as being romantically interested in anyone to a significant extent at the moment, Amy included. Heâs been too focused on his past, his identity crisis, the alien invasion, etc. I donât think thereâll really be room for romance in his life until he fully makes peace with his trauma. This moment at the end of his game...
...just doesnât do that. Shadow Dark Beginnings has made it abundantly clear that he hasnât moved on.
And this is where Amy comes in, because I think sheâs the ideal person for the job.
Sega seems to pivot back and forth between âShadow has no friendsâ and âShadow has two friends, but he even keeps them at a distance sometimes.â Without people in his life who are willing to reach out, he withdraws, and itâs really not good for him. A lot of fans feel heâs hesitant to bond with others because no one else is immortal and he knows how painful loss is. Itâs not explicitly stated, but itâs consistent with his behavior. Isolating himself is easy. Itâs safe. Itâs something he can control.
But itâs not sustainable.
He needs love. He needs it so much. Itâs his very purpose, in the most literal sense. Maria said it best in episode 2 of Dark Beginnings:
âYou have a big heart! It may be difficult for you to express it, but I know that deep down you really do care. About me. About everyone! What you do is what defines you. I know youâre having a hard time finding answers, but Iâm certain you will one day. Then, youâll find even more people you can trust.â
^ This is what I mean when I say Maria would love Amy. Amyâs the only other character who feels love as deeply as Shadow does, the only one who could fully understand, and she just so happens to be a clingy girl whoâll reach out to anyone, even people who think they want to be left alone. Itâs baffling that Sega basically hasnât let them interact for two decades because she absolutely would insist on befriending him.
Shadow hides, but Amy chases. She loves a challenge and doesnât shy away if she feels she belongs with someone, even if that person runs. If she decided Sonic wasnât right for her, I think itâs only natural that sheâd pursue Shadow given her obvious fondness for him. The only difference is that when someone chases Shadow, he doesnât run. He clings. He clung to Maria, he clung to Team Dark, and heâd cling to her, too, and I donât think heâd stand a chance against her charm from there. Heâs a romantic in his own way, and that soft spot of his would turn rose-tinted in a heartbeat. If thereâs anyone who could convince him that love is worth it, itâd be her; I highly doubt sheâd regret her past love of Sonic, and if he thought about it, I donât think heâd regret his attachment to Maria, either. Amy told him the people of Earth deserved a chance to be happy. Now he lives on Earth with her. Couldnât she convince him that he deserves that chance, too?
And if he hesitated and tried to ignore his feelings for Amy, I could see Rouge stepping in to kick him in the right direction. It wouldnât be the first time she talked some sense into him for the sake of his own happiness:
[IDW issue 36]
tl;dr: Amy already likes Shadow. If she spent more time with him, those feelings would grow, and it wouldnât be long before sheâd be pursuing him in earnest. With her talent for breaking down barriers and his existing soft spot for her, it wouldnât be a very long chase.
This headcanon is the one that I think portrays it best. I donât think Iâll ever fully stop writing Shadow Falls First, Amy Falls Harder because itâs so damn compelling, but I love this interpretation, too, and it lines up too well with canon to ignore.
#shadamy#amy rose#shadow the hedgehog#sonic the hedgehog#meta analysis#not a headcanon#i mean technically you could call it a headcanon#but for the sake of categorization & tag blacklisting...y'know#long post
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An introduction to narrative styles of the Locked Tomb series, care of me rambling about it on discord
Book 1 is like LMAO BONES. And hot girls đ Murder mystery dinner party, with sciency magic but mainly we just understand the swords. Protag has no idea whatâs going on but thatâs actually very helpful for helping the reader understand whatâs going on.
Book 2 is like Psychedelic Celestial Griefcore, with very complex magic Sci Fi that gets elaborated on at length. Dark. We are In Space for most of the book. God is there. Protag has no idea whatâs going on because her brain is fucked and itâs⌠sad? And extra confusing for the reader.
Book 3 is like Sunshine and Rainbows! Too much sunshine for most people actually! All the surrounding characters are living in a shitty urban sci fi dystopia but the narrator is full of love and joy in her city of riots and poverty and sweltering sun. Protag no idea whatâs going on because sheâs only been alive for 6 months. Love & Light đĽ°
#nona the ninth#gideon the ninth#harrow the ninth#the locked tomb#meta and rambles#im a locked tomb blogger now i guess!! wild that im getting all these notes#legit was just tagging for the purpose of blacklists and my own future searches#hello everyone
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Boys Will Be Boys: Batdad's reaction to the idea of dating for Cass, versus Dick and Damian
Note: Cass is 18 years old, Dick is 13-19 years old, Damian is 14 years old.
Note 2: Fanon isn't a dirty word, adopt the harmless fanon that makes you personally happy, etc.
Batgirl 2000 #39
Well, here you have the explanation that Bruce is worried about Cass being curious about a teen boy who illegally uses lethal force. Pretty understandable, right?
Batgirl 2000 #40
Right out of the gate, this is the part where I could be accused of taking things out of context to make poor Bru Bru look bad. Babs and Bruce are beefing over raising Cass, and Babs says stuff to get a rise out of Bruce. Babs is purposefully voicing the worst faith interpretation of Bruce's actions, while not giving him credit for the positives of his relationship with Cass. However, it's telling that Babs' words provoke an emotional reaction in Bruce. There is some ugly truth in what she's saying. (Later, Bruce also makes some valid criticism of Babs projecting onto Cass, though for a much lesser offense.)
Batgirl 2000 #42
An entire page devoted to this scene. Wow.
Batgirl 2000 #51
"HOT..."?
Batman #345
This page didn't age the best; 2020s are for hindsight, as they say, after all.
(But this is a 1980s, pre-Crisis comic. Real fans know canon only counts for post-Crisis comics published no earlier than 1992.)
Batman/Superman: Worldâs Finest #8
Gee, Dick. Why does Batdad give you the okay for dating a Super?
(This comic was published much too recently, outside the post-Crisis era! We can't be sure that this Mark Waid writer fellow knows what he's doing with these characters.)
The Batman Chronicles #9
Aw, how sweet. It's normal to have a little crush at thirteen-ish.
Batman and Robin (2023) #7
Gee, Dami. Why does Batdad give you the okay for dating a killer?
â Cassandra Cain starter reading recs
â Cassandra Cain meta
#cassandra cain#dick grayson#batgirl#batdad#batgirl 2000#damian wayne#Canon Bruce Wayne#<- that is my new ''anti Bruce Wayne'' blacklist tag just in case#Batgirl 2000#Canon Batdad#Please feel free to steal these panels to make your own post btw. This isn't really a meta.#undescribed#uncaptioned#Jason isn't here and others aren't here and I didn't feel like pulling up more comics for this. Anyway.#Bruce: aggressive about his daughter dating and (sometimes worryingly) hands-off for his sons.
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The reason I ended that Crocodad AU where he finds Baby Robin-post where I did was because I actually just don't know what would happen next, where things would go from there. Let's talk about that.
Also apologies in advance, this post got obscenely long. Again. I don't know how this keeps on happening.
(If you wanted the minimum context without having to read the whole OG post, just scroll down to the Plot Section and read until the end from there)
But just to give a minor recap: They're in the tombs of Alubarna, Cobra's dead and the second the guards notice their king has gone missing they're going go searching for him. So there's no time to mess around, Crocodile and Robin need to leave as soon as possible before they're discovered, otherwise they'll risk getting reported to the World Government for assasinating Cobra and boy howdy Croc's not going to be a Shichibukai for long if that happens. The two are there to just get what they want. Crocodile wants Pluton. And the Poneglyph says its in Wano Country
What the hell are either of these two going to do? In this scenario?
'Cause on one hand, there's Robin, who could be scared shitless of Crocodile and unsure what to do next.
If Robin tells him, will Crocodile kill her because he doesn't need her anymore? Because he got what he wanted?
Or might he lash out at her and kill her because the weapon isn't in Alabasta as he had assumed?
But if she refuses to tell him, he'll kill her anyways, won't he?
She can't run away from him anyways, he'd catch her in seconds.
Should she lie and give him a fake location nearby in the hopes of creating an opportunity for her to escape?
But even if she managed to escape, she'd be back on the run from the Government all over again, fighting for her life, all alone.
(Minor note but it's worth pointing out that Robin probably wouldn't know about Wano's takeover, she might not know who Kaidou is, let alone what the Yonkou are, or where Wano even is. Like we know it's a bombshell of information, but Robin wouldn't know where on The Scale of Bad News it'd land, and that could also add to her fear of telling the truth)
Like I think those would be the kinds of thoughts that would run through Robin's mind, and even I can't tell what she'd do.
And on the other hook, we have Mr Murderdile. How the fuck would he even react to whatever Robin would do?
I mean I don't think he'd actually kill Robin if she told him the truth about what the Poneglyph says. I do think he would Fucking Furious and deeply hurt if she'd refuse to tell him, if she'd lie or tried to flee, as these would be acts of betrayal and we know Crocodile would not take that well. Would he kill her for betraying him? Possibly? Since he could see her as a threat to his son's life (the priority), I don't fucking know man. That could very much turn into like a "Doflamingo killing Rocinante" moment for Crocodile in this AU.
But what the fuck would he do if he found out Pluton was in Wano?
Mind you, by this point the country would've been freshly taken over by Kaidou, and it's only been 2-5 years since Crocodile would've had his ass kicked by Whitebeard in the New World. Like that trauma would be Quite Fresh in his mind. I don't think Crocodile would be stupid enough to try to go to Wano. It'd be stupid fucking dangerous, and surely he'd know that. And not just in the "he could get killed by Kaidou" kind of way, but because surely Crocodile would realize Kaidou was sitting on top of Pluton as they spoke. Even if he didn't know about it yet, if Kaidou found out about Pluton being directly beneath his gigantic ass, it would be Fucking Bad. And thus going to the island with the only person on the planet who could reveal the exact location of the weapon would be a stupid ass move. (Of course, without the heir of the Kozuki Clan Pluton can't be released and Momo has just been yeeted into the future, so even if they did go they wouldn't be able to open the borders of Wano, but unless the Alabastan Poneglyph explained that then neither Robin or Crocodile would understand that)
So if Crocodile's only goal in life at this moment had been obtaining an Ancient Weapon so he could nuke the World Government and then go be with his son (since nothing in the world could threaten his child anymore and force Crocodile to keep his distance to keep him safe)... And he found out he was far, far too weak to even obtain that weapon... What would Crocodile do? Knowing he wouldn't be able to do what he wanted, that he wouldn't get to be with his son ever again?
(Mind you. There is a whole discussion to be had about whether or not Crocodile was suicidal during Impel Down/Marineford and if his petty revenge against Whitebeard was a borderline suicide mission. Because unironically I think there's like a 40-50% chance that could be the case. And I'm pointing this out because if Crocodile was canonically suicidal after failing to take over Alabasta, how would this scenario in this AU be different? Aside from the obvious time commitment, and the way Crocodile's traumas would be much more fresh at this point compared to canon)
Like. What can he do anymore? What's there left for him to do?
Fall into absolute despair and give up? Allow the royal guards to find and capture him, and let the WG throw him in jail for assassinating King Cobra for no reason? Or just kill himself on the spot because what would it matter, he'd die eventually anyways? God knows, even if he wanted to keep on opposing the WG, between the Dragodile Divorce (and however the fuck that might've played out) and Crocodile probably not approving of Dragon's methods for revolution (too idealistic, soft, and slow), ditching his Warlord-status and fully joining the Revolutionary Army wouldn't suit Crocodile either. He's a pirate, not some hero of justice. And he's never going to be strong enough to defeat the WG himself, all alone. That's what the Ancient Weapon was for to begin with.
So, what would he do now, when his final option had been crossed out, labeled impossible. Would death be the easy way out, and at least give him the peace of mind knowing his son could never be linked back to him and put into danger because of him?
But what would happen to Robin?
If Crocodile allowed himself to become captured and go to jail, Robin would be doomed too. Between his hatred of the Government and Robin being an innocent child, surely he didn't want the Government to get their hands on her, they'd just put her to death. But what else could he do? Tell her to run? Leave her to fend for herself all over again? Alone? Would he have it in him to tell her that?
Or would Crocodile's anger and spite at the Government be more powerful than his despair? Would he rather flee with Robin for now and figure things out later, when they're not in some ancient tombs with the corpse of a king where they could be found out any second and be in far deeper shit than they're already in?
And I think this is where we circle back to what Robin would do, first. Because even if Robin told Crocodile the truth, there's still multiple ways she could do that, and depending on how Robin went about it, that could influence Crocodile's reaction too, couldn't it?
If the two hadn't become too fond of each other yet, and Robin very calmly told Crocodile Pluton was in Wano, I think he could just become kind of catatonic in shock and horror, falling into despair. Maybe without saying a word he'd just walk out of the tombs straight to the guards without ever looking back. Abandoning Robin and leaving her running for her life again, alone.
But Robin is at this point a 12 year old child***
The sheer intensity of this situation could become too much for her. And if she had become fond of Crocodile, if despite everything she still wanted to stay with him because he had been the only source of safety she had had in three years... what if she just burst into tears, and told Crocodile she was afraid of him and what he might do to her because he might not like what the Poneglyph said? What would Crocodile do then? How would Crocodile react to that? To this child being not just brutally honest, but emotionally vulnerable and showing him that she WANTED to trust him? If Crocodile had been emotionally flipflopping between trying to remain emotionally unavailable to Robin because he didn't trust her, and trying to be caring (partially because he was intentionally trying to manipulate her and partially because he genuinely felt bad for her)... Would this become the moment Crocodile himself realizes he has to decide if he's going to be a cruel pirate who only cares about his son's safety, or be Robin's guardian? Either demand her to just spit it out if she knows what's good for her, or comfort her and tell her he would never hurt her regardless of what the Poneglyph said? And... almost regardless of what Crocodile would choose, could Robin's outburst still like... both soften the blow of the bad news and emotionally ground Crocodile? So that he wouldn't fall into despair?
If so... Guess the two would just have to flee then. Leave their hostage (be it the (unconcious???) pregnant queen or baby Vivi) behind, and just leave Alabasta. There'd be nothing left in that country for them anyways, nothing but people who could catch Crocodile and report him to the World Government for assasinating their King (mainly Shaka who could probably tell their king was murdered by a heavy smoker thanks to his DF and then realize it was Crocodile if he ever gotten within sniffing distance from him), leading to his Shichibukai Status to being stripped from him. Escaping and never coming back would be their priority.
Whatever the fuck would happen next is a bloody mystery though
Like IDK maybe, after getting over whatever emotional turmoil he'd be going through, Crocodile could start building an organization of some kind?? But this time with the intent of wrecking Kaidou's ass and taking over Wano himself????? (Roccoco Works wouldn't nececarily have to be a secret organization either since if he wanted to take over a non-WG Affiliated country from some pirate... He could just do that. The WG shouldn't care. He would have to be extremely careful though to make sure nobody ever found out his sweet little assistant/secretary Miss Sunday was actually Nico Robin. Also if he was the Rev Army's Secret Sugar Daddy he'd have to be extremely careful who he would hire to work for him. Like the hiring process would be extremely selective still, if not more-so than with BW?) Also he could spend a fuck ton of time just working out to get as swole as humanly possible. Because god knows he'll need to if he wanted to actually fight Kaidou and survive with all his limbs still in-tact. Maybe try to get friendly with Moria too knowing Moria has some serious beef with Kaidou and could be down for getting revenge one day. But mind you, this would be A Whole Process which would no doubt take years if not decades.
All while looking after Robin. Because he was all she had and he couldn't possibly abandon her now. He's in too deep.
And this is where my brain finally hits a brick wall with this AU, I can't imagine how shit would go down from here on. Because IDK, this whole thing started out more as a thought experiment (of "how would things be different if they met earlier") and the further you go down the timeline it stops being wild what if-speculation and more just a fanfic lmao
***(Look if I'm not wrong, the year Luffy was born Robin should be going 11 turning 12, right? (And Croc 27 -> 28). But if enough time has passed that Vivi has been born, well, Robin's birthday is a few days after Vivi's, so she could've turned 13 by now. Or hell, this whole shitshow of a scenario could take place on her birthday if you wanted to be really evil) (But if I'm wrong and Robin was 10 -> 11 the year Luffy was born, then she'd be around turning 12 at this point) (This shit is so complicated aaaaa đ)
One more note because I might as well put them in the same post
So in my mind, if Crocodad Real IN GENERAL then it would make perfect sense to me if Crocodile's reason for wanting his funny little military nation and to obtain Pluton was to nuke Marijoa and just delete the World Government so his baby boy would be safe. Because god knows if the Government found out Dragon had a son (or that he had been involved with the Revs/plotted against them and that he had a son), that baby boy would become a target for the WG. Thus he couldn't even take his child with him and raise him like Bege or Big Mom did with their kids. Like it wasn't even an option. And because that's like my default headcanon already, I'm obviously applying it to this silly Crocodad AU.
But it raises a fun question; what would Crocodile tell baby Robin about his motivations?
Like, I can perfectly imagine Crocodile explaining to Robin that he hates the WG and wants to destroy them, and that not only would Robin be safe with him (not just in the "I won't hurt you or turn you in to the Marines, we're on the same side", or the "I'm stronk and can protect you from danger" way, but also "the WG can't find you if you're under my wing" way), but also if she helped him find an Ancient Weapon, she could help him defeat her greatest enemy for once and for all and become free herself.
And that's not a bad deal, now is it.
But even if Crocodile explained that to Robin when they'd first meet, just to get her to agree to coming with him, surely it would take Robin some time to actually start trusting Crocodile, after spending the past three years on the run. 'Cause in her mind, either the Government Approved Pirate was lying to get her guard down (so it'd be easier to hand her over to the WG), or the Government Approved Pirate was explicitly admitting to being a backstabber and couldn't be trusted. But hey Papadile could maybe win her trust with some time, plenty of books and maybe a few plushies
However.
I'm sure Robin would wonder WHY Crocodile wanted to destroy the World Government. And Crocodile sure as fucking hell would never tell her it was because he had a son, god knows he would not trust her with that information. I'm not sure if Robin would ask about Crocodile's motivations, and even if she did, I'm sure he'd find a way to respond in a truthful way without telling her anything (Like arguably he isn't free from the WG either, he can either play and pretend to be on their side until they decide they have no more use for him, or try to eliminate them first and ensure his own safety. So he could tell Robin that as an excuse) (Kill-or-Be-Killed is not a great life lesson to be teaching Nico Robin Age 12) And you know, not knowing why this Scary Pirate wants a weapon of mass destruction would raise alarm bells in anyone's mind. Robin isn't stupid.
And now we circle right back to the begining of this post. Again. This post is a fucking timeloop, there is no escape. What would Robin do when Crocodile would ask her to read him the Poneglyph. Because there is that option that she could try to ask him Crocodile why he wanted to destroy the WG, then and there. Possibly defiantly, possibly calmly, possibly with tears running down her little face because she's scared out of her mind and wants to have faith in her guardian, but is unsure because the situation she's found herself in is a train wreck and Croc's on thin ice. And would she start with the question right away, or would she first tell the truth and then, after seeing Crocodile's reaction, ask him about it? And would Crocodile tell her? The TL:DR; of it? That he had a son whom the WG would want dead if they ever found out about it, a son he wanted to protect? That that's what this all was about?
And how would Robin feel about such a revelation?
Because on one hand, it could be calming for her, to understand that Crocodile wasn't out for world domination like a cartoon villian or anything, that his motivations were actually understandable. He just wanted to protect his family. But on the other hand... if Robin had been (conciously or subconciously) hoping to find a father figure in Crocodile... would finding out that Crocodile had his own son, his own family somewhere out there... Would that knowledge break Robin? Because in her mind, even if she hadn't wished for it conciously, Crocodile could never become a father for her? Because if/when Crocodile would get what he wanted, he'd just go be with his son?
Keep in mind. Robin's core fears and trauma come from not just betrayal, but also abandonment. A fear of being alone. Even if it was for Robin's own sake, her mother left her behind. She wasn't able to find friends or community in Ohara at all, even with the people of the library she felt left out because they wouldn't allow her to participate in the Poneglyph research (understandable on their part) And even when Robin's uncle and his family "adopted" her, she was treated as an other in the family. An unwanted burden, a servant. Not a real member of the family.
Finding out Crocodile had a family he wanted to return to could in her mind mean she was going to become abandoned again, left behind to fend for herself. Even if the WG wasn't out to get her, that would still be absolutely soul crushing for a child. And even if Crocodile did decide to adopt Robin, would she not be afraid of being treated as an other in that family too, because she wasn't his daughter? That he'd never love her the way he'd love his own son?
How would the truth behind Crocodile's motivations actually make Robin feel?
And one final gut punch before I go:
Would Crocodile struggle with some kind of guilt and shame over looking after Robin when he had his son somewhere out there? Would he be beating himself up inside because he couldn't stop himself for caring so damn much about this poor kid, but didn't want to treat Robin like some kind of a replacement for his own child? And would those feelings get even worse after finding out he couldn't even get Pluton because the bloody thing was hiding under Kaidou's ass? Would Crocodile feel horrible about how he had to abandon his son seemingly forever and then found himself looking after some other child instead?
Also. If the Dragodile Divorce was bad, especially in the "Dragon wasn't particularly accepting" kinda way, and if Crocodile had this deep fear inside of him about whether or not his son would ever accept him as his other dad and/or be upset about not having a mom (a fear that could get worse over time since he wouldn't have been with his baby from the begining, that he'd have to show up in his child's life later, praying for acceptance and forgiveness for having to leave him behind)... Would Robin potentially expressing that she saw Crocodile as a father-figure kind of break Crocodile (in a good way)? Not just because of the gender affirmation (for the recently transitioned guy mind you), but also because it'd mean that there was at least one person in the world who looked at him and thought they wanted him as their father? And could that happiness then like ADD ON to whatever guilt Crocodile could also be feeling?
These two are such broken people. I can not help but to wonder if they'd be able to navigate through their complicated emotions and find the healing and comfort they both so desperately need.
Anyway yeah that's the post, hope you enjoyed The Thoughts
#Moon posting#OP Meta#Sir Crocodile#Nico Robin#Crocodad#Not sure I can say ''back due to popular demand'' but close enough I guess#I am just Haunted by Thoughts#This really got obscenely fucking long jesus christ#Feels wrong to tag this with Crocodad but this is an AU based on it and it's like relevant so??? It's there for blacklisting if nothing els#Good god my Activity Feed has Not Been The Same since I posted that fanart on my main though oh my god#I'm glad y'all enjoy this AU concept as much as I do. We can suffer emotionally together lmao
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I don't think this connection is ever explicitly made in the game, but The Expression has got to be at least partially the result of Harry's partial paralysis from polio, right? We know he mostly recovered, but it still affects his face enough to impact his speech.
Anyway I like to make myself sad by thinking about Harry not quite being able to emote in a socially acceptable way his whole life, and how that must have impacted how he comes off to the people around him. No wonder he grew a mustache that hides a lot of his face, and tried to pick up Guillaume Le Million's famous charming (?) smile and just kinda stuck with that for decades.
#disco elysium#de meta#harry du bois#de os#edit: hey tumblr why are you hiding this post from the main disco elysium tag#did I use some kind of secret blacklisted word in here#LMAO yeah I did. figured out what the word was#and edited it out
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Some days, coming home, getting on Tumblr and looking at my activity log, seeing people liking and reblogging, commenting in replies and tags on posts I've shared from different fandoms or dealing with different subjects, it's like...
It's like I prepared a buffet before I left my house for work that morning, I opened a gigantic table in the living room and I put there every dish and drink I could think of, just a huge assortment for whatever people's taste in food might be, I sent out invitations to all of my friends and left the door open for them. Then I came back home to find them all eating and drinking in my living room, enjoying the different dishes, chatting away happily... and most days, being disabled, I don't have the energy to join the buffet. I go and lie down to rest in my bed. But I can hear the chatter from the living room. And it makes me happy. It just makes me so, so happy.
Thank you for coming to my buffet, friends.
#fandom#fandom culture#fandom meta#fandom things#fandom love#buddie#mileapo#captain swan#black sails#judaism#feminism#jewish history#gay pride#cute animals#just some of the stuff i post about#at least semi-regularly#and it makes me so happy that the dishes are so diverse and there's always someone that likes at least one#kinnporsche#our flag means death#the blacklist
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i don't think that i will ever talk about dsmp meta to the degree that i used to ever again. idk i feel wilbur soot's absence so heavily in fanworks and in what the content creators are doing too. so many parts that would've included him clearly cut from tommy's live show, so many deleted fanworks that are unrecoverable, it's just this big insanely depressing black hole and blank space that makes it hard to continue to be part of this community or want to engage with anything here when so much has been stripped away. it feels like there's barely anything left. and what's left is unrecognizable
#i think about deleting this blog fairly often#but i would never do that because so much art and meta would be lost#so idk. idk#just been really feeling like i don't want to be part of this community anymore#which i thought i'd never feel like that. so it extra sucks#personal#negative#wilbur soot#<- for blacklist
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listen. idgaf whether fearne wanted the shard or not. this isn't about fearne saying ashton should have the shard. this is about ashton taking the shard without telling the rest of the party! this is about ashton (nearly) killing themself because of a misguided assumption about what the party needs, without any actual discussion about it! this is about ashton's persistent inability to let people speak for themselves instead of presuming to know what's best for them! do you hear me!!!!!
#whether or not bh forced the shard onto fearne has nothing to do with whether or not ashton could've just told them that he wanted it.#whether or not ashton could've just told them he was about to do something that would probably kill him right then and there#whether or not ashton could've just told them that he thinks they needed him to do that#i spent a VERY long time on that first post making sure it came across as reasonably diplomatic and open-minded while still honest#but if ppl continually respond to that by telling me that my subjective opinions on this character are Incorrect#and that there's some secret third thing i've been too narrow-minded or stupid or whatever to consider#then truly why do i even bother!!#text#nova shh#critical role#cr3#cr spoilers#cr meta#*meta#cr negativity#blacklist cr negativity if you don't want to see this stuff. truly i'm sorry lmao
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Ahsoka's place in SW can be a complicated thing, because I feel both things about her--I too am often frustrated by how Filoni writes her, but I too am also grateful that her character exists and isn't the "default" straight white cis dude character. (Though, I do wish she were played by someone other than RD because of All That.)
Ahsoka got so much flak when she first appeared, people hated her just for existing, for daring to take up any space in the Star Wars story, and then she swung around to being nearly put on a pedestal by a large chunk of the fandom, she was lionized pretty heavily in some corners, and I think we're now going through the further growing pains of backlash against the hype, especially because Ahsoka is in the position of often being used as a bludgeon against the Jedi.
To be honest, I don't see nearly as much criticism of Ahsoka's character as I do for other popular characters, I see far more of Obi-Wan and Anakin and Yoda, but maybe that's just the sphere of experience I have, but I see that criticism balanced out with a ton of fic, art, and positive commentary about her. And it makes me wonder if she's in that awkward spot of not quite as central to the story as the movie characters, but more important than almost any other SW character (in the sense of any one character ever being able to be more "important" than another, you know what I mean) where we haven't quite settled into a stable balance of how to approach her character.
So, she's high level enough now that she can take some people being critical of her character or even just flat-out not being kind to her, because she has so much support from the story itself and from all across the fandom, even as honestly I haven't seen much that's been notably mean to her character. Sure, I see a few posts talking about how Ahsoka is Filoni's Blorbo, but are they truly more common than the posts that are celebrating her character? Genuinely wondering, because that hasn't been my experience. (Honestly, I would say Qui-Gon fans have it worse, given that he's another of Filoni's Blorbos, just without the added bonus of actually having anything fun to counter balance it, where even the people who say he was a True Jedi don't really care about Qui-Gon, you know? There's no skits, no commentary, etc. Just a handful of fic authors who are quietly doing their own thing and being the good in the world they want to see.)
At the same time, I get what you're feeling, that it feels uncomfortable to be critical of a female character, especially one who is played by a WOC, especially in a fandom that is pretty fucking vicious towards female characters having anything to actually do in the story. That the criticism of Ahsoka's character/status as Filoni's Blorbo isn't always fair or considerate, because people are frustrated and SW fandom wears all our nerves down to the last.
I'm not really sure where I land with all of this, because I get both sides, the frustration and the affection both, and I think there needs to be space for both in fandom just because we can't police other people's reactions to stuff. It's hard to continue liking her when she's being pitted against your faves, it's hard to be kind to Jedi fans when they're frustrated because she's being used as a bludgeon against their faves, it's hard to just walk away from people ignoring that Ahsoka is really meaningful to a lot of people because she's a non-romance-focused female character coded as/played by a woman of color, it's hard not to feel like Ahsoka's such a popular character that she can take a few people on tumblr not liking her.
My best advice is to just keep loving Ahsoka in the way that you think will attract the other friends you want to have around you--like, for me, when I talk about Anakin, I often try to do so in a way that's affectionate towards him and the Jedi, how much they loved him and how much I think he loved them in returned, because that's who I want to gravitate towards in fandom, those who like both. I try to do the same with Qui-Gon now and again, when I start getting frustrated by how he's used to bludgeon the Jedi, I start going HEY GUESS WHAT I'M EMOTIONS ABOUT HOW MUCH QUI-GON LOVED HIS JEDI FAMILY and it makes me feel better! I would love to see more people do the same with Ahsoka! Prop her up by appealing to how much she loves other characters, too! Like, every time I get frustrated at the way some of fandom treats her, I remember SHE WANTED TO GO BACK TO THE JEDI, SHE LOVED THEM, and I'm like THAT IS MY GIRL I LOVE HER SO MUCH SHE IS SO BRAVE TO STRUGGLE THROUGH ALL THIS AND STILL FIND THE LOVE IN HER HEART.
Or sometimes, like with Bo-Katan, I like to lean into them being a hot mess because yessssssss I love a hot mess of a lady because I am a hot mess of a lady and Felt That. I hope Ahsoka gets to be all kinds of deliciously fucked up in her series and making mistakes and learning and being interesting and working her way back to the surface from her own depths because she is SUCH a strong character and deserves to be crunchy as hell/have bite as a character, like HOW MANY YEARS did she stew in her guilt about Anakin, refusing to let it go? How long did she hold onto that fear, so much that even the Force had to smack her in the face to try to make her let it go on Lothal? GIRL, I AM CRYING FOR YOU, YOU HAVE BEEN THROUGH SO MUCH, LET ME GET YOU SOME SOUP AND I HOPE THE FORCE-GHOSTS ALL COME BOTHER YOU TO MAKE SURE YOU'RE EATING ENOUGH, because I love a character that has bite.
This kind of got away from me, but that's usually where I end up when trying to wrap my head around the frustration of a character's place in fandom. I get why people are frustrated with the way Filoni writes her, but also the frustration of feeling like the important representation of her character sometimes gets lost in the shuffle, that both sides have validity, and my best way out of this is to double down on loving everyone in this bar.
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What do you think James and Lily's relationship was like?
thanks for the ask! these are my headcanons for their super dysfunctional relationship (jily followers note that this is anti jily):
i constantly change my mind about the specifics, but i often hc lilyâs parents as dying her 7th year (either in a car crash or murdered by death eaters). jamesâs die later on - i ignore the dragon pox extracanon and just go with they were murdered by death eaters.
so potentially for lily, grief was a big part of why her and james got together. this could parallel harryâs (also terrible) relationship with ginny, where grief for sirius was pushing his sudden obsession with her in hbp.
lily's also in love with sirius at this point and trying to get over him, and there's an element of her trying to get revenge on snape. i love lily being messy.
jily get together around christmas 7th year. they are extremely on and off and break up a few times. they were broken up when lily got pregnant, it was otherwise a one night stand that wouldn't have led to them getting back together.
they fight a lot, which would be realistic given the conditions of the war and how young they were even for a happy couple. but combine that with their being trapped in a house together and not allowed to leave⌠itâs a recipe for disaster.
lily feels incredibly stifled in her role as a wife and james definitely buys into traditional heteronormative marriage roles a tiny bit (it's definitely not something he does consciously, but we see gender expectations are an issue with ron and hermione too - i.e. hermione as relegated to the cooking in dh and ron complains about how he misses his mother's cooking, etc.)
there are moments where lily sees who they could be and sees the james that sirius and remus see, and how the two of them would get along if they were friends
she's already planning a divorce by the time they die.
here are more of thoughts on them.
#anti j*ly#anti jily#so my j.ily followers can blacklist#lily evans#lily evans potter#lily potter#pro lily evans#hp meta#hp headcanons#harry potter meta#harry potter#asks
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i see a lot of meta about astarion being angry that no one else has come to save him earlier and that's why he was Like That in act 1, and i absolutely agree, but also i keep thinking about how his victims would be 10000x as resentful to see his relationship with tav.
imagine being one of the shy sweet ones that he lured in. imagine being fucking sebastian. you trusted him. you loved him. you thought, finally, someone really likes me for who i am. and then he brings you to a place worse than hell.
imagine being one of them, and hearing astarion tell someone else, "you're the only person i ever truly cared for". imagine suffering for so, so long for the sin of trusting a man who did everything to make you trust him, and learning that your love meant nothing to him.
he ruined your life and sent you to hell, but your love never meant anything to him and never will. because you met at the wrong time and place? or because you were too weak, not the heroic adventurer he needed to rescue him - you were never enough?
it's not astarion's fault that his victims were kept in a cage for centuries with nothing to their name but scars and never-ending hunger. but it's not the fault of the people he encountered in those 200 years either, for not saving him. how could they have known?
#bg3 spoilers#astarion#meta#reluctantly tagging in case anyone blacklists tags#but plz don't let this break containment
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Iâm trying to figure out what the hell the deal is with Bg3 and kink, and I think that, while it is much less precious about sex and sexuality than a lot of things are, it does fall into some of the same traps in a way that⌠well, it irks me. Disclaimer that while I did do some poking around, there are some romance scenes I have not seen. Iâll run through the ones I know about for those of you who havenât picked up a brain bug about this.Â
Wyll gets nothing. This is a separate post that other people have made better than I have.Â
Shadowheartâs romance scene in Act 3 runs one of two waysâ either you go for a swim with her, she gets poked by a rock, and you pause while she gets rid of the offending object, or you do the Nightfall Feast, where you get pushed to the ground, she tells you to stop being so gentle, and the whole thing is framed as an âact of wickednessâ in parallel to you having just dumped the Nightsongâs blood on a statue of Selune. You have literal blood on your hands during this scene.Â
Karlach pegs you in Act 3. I, personally, do not count this as being particularly kinky. The whole concept of measuring kink is a little silly, in my humble opinion, but it seems strange to say penetration gets kinkier when itâs not a flesh-and-blood penis. (If you have sex with her in Act 2, it is kinkless.)
Galeâs got his whole astral projection thing going, which brings us solidly into kink territory. Tav mostly hangs out. Weâll circle back to this. There is also a non-illusory version, but it is exclusively fade-to-black.Â
Astarion does a whole seduction act in Act 1, which leads to a short and honestly quite tame (although fun!) scene. Act 3, you either get the spawn ending where you have sex on his grave (he pushes you down, and it is later flagged as âhad sex as equalsâ), or you get the ascension and the whole âon your kneesâ bit.Â
Laeâzel very explicitly talks in terms of obedience and dominance and submission, and you can tell her to submit to you. We will also circle back to this scene. In act 2, you beat the crap out of each other, and either you get the option to say, âyou are mine,â or you lose, and you get, âI am yoursâ after she also says she doesnât want to hurt you.
Halsin has the bear scene. Or he tries very hard not to turn into a bear. Tav is once again mostly hanging out. There was a dev note at one point saying Tav was meant to hold onto his head while he went down on them, but that does not happen in this scene.Â
Minthara shows Tav exactly where to put their hands and mouth. Repeatedly. At length. There is no option to take control of the scene.Â
A pattern emerges from these scenes fairly quickly: if Tav is active, they are either actively submitting (i.e., the Minthara scene) or engaging without power exchange (Shadowheart, Karlach, Astarionâs act 1 and spawn scenes). Galeâs scene is a special case since heâs controlling the illusion, but Larian could have decided Tav was allowed to imagine themself with a few extra limbs. They probably chose not to do this to spare the poor animators. However, with the rest of the pattern, it still makes me raise an eyebrow. The Halsin scene, to me, is especially egregious as you do precisely fuck-all. At multiple times, you get very clear camera angles of Tavâs completely relaxed hands that give the distinct impression that Tav is in full pillow princess mode.Â
You will also note kink and morality seem to have an⌠interesting relationship. Explicit powerplay occurs with Laeâzel in Act 1 (she is still solidly in the mindset inspired by Vlaakith and is arguably evil-aligned at this point), Minthara (you get this scene by slaughtering the grove), and Ascended Astarion (you just killed 7,000 people and he thinks youâre, and I quote, âdegrading yourselfâ). You also get a hint of this in the contrast between Shadowheartâs Selunite Swim and the Nightfall Feast. This feels related to why when you try to flip the script on Laeâzel, you use an intimidation check rather than persuasion or performance. This could be explained by saying that Larian has decided that orders are best represented by intimidation, even in a romantic context, but most of the intimidation checks we get are open threats, often of physical violence. Iâm not entirely sure how much Laeâzel drops her powerplay as she becomes a kinder person. Iâd love to hear from people who have done more of her romance than I have.Â
Abdirak is a torturer serving an evil goddess. He gets the playerâs consent and is reasonably sweet to them if they obtain his goddessâs blessing. There are even two seconds of aftercare! His actual purpose, however, is to torture the man next door, and the two companions who cheer him on are Astarion and Shadowheart, both of whom are having some struggles with morality at this point in the game.Â
And then thereâs the Drow twinsâ and specifically Sorn. If someone other than Tav approaches him, he says you need a ârear of cast-ironâ to take what he dishes out. His ambient dialogue talks about scaring off clients who were paying him to apply a clamping device to something delicate. But if you see him alone, your options are roleplay, sensation play, or size kink. I did say I wouldnât try to measure kink, but it feels like false advertising. (You can wrestle him in the Drizzt Doâurden roleplay scenario. It is an ability check. This raises questions for me about how this was negotiated, but itâs not a deal breaker.) Whereâs the sadism promised in his ambient dialogue? Some characters just arenât subs, thatâs fine, but this is about patterns, not individual characters.Â
I should pause here to say that the only thing in the above with which I have an actual issue on an individual level is Tav being so limp in the Halsin scene. It would be nice if Tav touched back in a way more significant than holding onto his arms a bit and laying a limp hand on his thigh if he stays elf shaped. This is not a moral complaintâ itâs aesthetic. Frankly, none of this is saying Larian has done anything immoral.
However. Iâm a little frustrated, as someone who does not have a submissive bone in my body, that all but one romance scene in this game is designed for a submissive Tav or a Tav who does not want powerplay. Itâs not uncommon to find people who are okay with impact play if you donât want to hit, CNC if you donât want to be the faux-aggressor, ageplay or petplay if you donât want to be the adult/owner. This is not a kink-positive stance or even kink-neutral. I should also note here that I do not judge any of the characters mentioned, not even Abdirak, for their interest in consensual kink. If I judge them, itâs for unrelated reasons. Or reasons that should be unrelated but often donât feel like it, as it seems like Larian has set them up to be interested in powerplay and sadism because of their less-than-decent moral leanings. Abdirak wants to whip Tav because heâs a follower of the Lady of Pain. Ascended Astarion isnât playing when he tells Tav he wants to own them, body, mind, and soul, and thereâs no safewording out of every other interaction after that. Shadowheart tells you to stop being gentle because she has become a Dark Justiciar. Laeâzel stops wanting to hurt Tavâ and you consent to the fightâ because sheâs learning about care and softness. I donât think she stops being kinky, but there are patterns, and patterns that extend beyond the boundaries of the game.Â
Frankly, Iâm not sure what sort of conclusion Iâm aiming for here. There are patterns in Larianâs approach to sex, power, and pain that indicate some very familiar hangups. It would be nice if there were more room for a dominant Tav, not even with every character, but with a few of them. Some people donât sub. Some characters donât sub. It makes sense. But Iâll be rotating this further. And writing fic. To anyone else who likes writing a dominant Tav: hi! Keep doing what youâre doing!
I wouldnât be posting this if I didnât want to hear other peopleâs thoughts, but quick disclaimer: I will block anyone who comes onto this post to talk about how great the vampire ascendant is. Itâs not personal. I simply would blacklist anything to do with that if I could, and the way the tagâs been going, I canât. You saw the tags on this, and you clicked anyway. Similarly, if youâre going to throw a shitfit about how no one should like whipping a consenting partner, donât waste your breath. You get the picture.Â
#text#bg3#meta#ascended astarion negative#it's NOT ABOUT THAT#but i don't want anyone getting surprised#and i want people able to blacklist if necessary#anyway i wrote this while i was meant to be getting ready for work#looked up#and had two and a half pages in a google doc
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daenerys is a cultural icon but she is most certainly one of the most misunderstood characters which is so crazy to me considering sheâs such an easy character to understand. sheâs the only character whose motives are questions and twisted 24/7 when itâs clear sheâs a selfless young girl who tries to see the best in others and make the best of the horrible awful shitty situations sheâs in. sheâs the only character whose abuse and rape is either mocked or severely downplayed, some even say she benefited from it. shes the only character who is going to âgo madâ, when the other two targaryen contenders (both men, mind you) will not go mad, kill her, get her dragons and titles and rule instead of her. sheâs the only character not allowed to get angry or have sexual autonomy. sheâs the only character who is vilified for watching her long time abuser die. sheâs the only character whoâs abuse at the hands of her brother is completely disregarded. shes the only character not allowed to kill those who hurt her / those she loves. sheâs the only character not allowed to retaliate against her baby being murdered. sheâs the only character whoâs entire childhood is downplayed and ignored. shes the only character whoâs special connection to magic and dragons is so incredibly overlooked and downplayed and vilified. sheâs the only character who must die in the end to âpay for her ancestors crimesâ, when no other main character is (as if the work sheâs doing isnât actively going against her ancestors?) itâs all so fucking infuriating and this isnât even all of it.
#mostly just venting#btw this is just from my experience and not at all a meta#it's just all so much sometimes#obviously as a dany stan i would see more of hate against her than any other characters#so take that into consideration#daenerys targaryen#rape tw#abuse tw#venting#leah rambles#long post#asoiaf#<- for ppl who blacklist
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