#message me when u can bc i miss talking to u every day and i want to celebrate ur bday with u as best i can <3< /div>
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woosansang · 2 years ago
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a collection of incredible, life changing, discord dm spam worthy seonghwas ♡ happy birthday to one of my favourite people, fio @hwanswerland ♡
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h4m1lt0ns · 8 months ago
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HEARTBREAK SYNDROME.
episode fourteen :: HEAR ME OUT.
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ pairing ︴various, lewis hamilton x y/n
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ genre ︴social media au / irl snippets
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ summary ﹔girl you will not believe who texted y/n
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ face claim ﹔ wonyoung jang (28)
꒰꒰◌‧₊ ⬪˙⋆ warnings ﹕ excessive cussing, none.
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y/n: i’m sorry who is this?
xxx-xxx: it’s kelly
y/n: ?
y/n: kelly piquet?
xxx-xxx: unfortunately
xxx-xxx: its an emergency.
xxx-xxx: and girl to girl, we NEED to talk.
y/n: OH?
xxx-xxx: i need to see you.
xxx-xxx: will u be at the qatar gp?
y/n: yes!! we can talk there, but is it urgent?
xxx-xxx: i know what you’ve seen from me gives u every reason under the sun to not even want to breath the same air as me but this is for your safety.
y/n: i got you.
y/n: see you tomorrow.
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☆ IMESSAGE with ; BOARD OF DIRECTORS.
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y/n: if you’re available for gossip irl raise ur hand
angel carmen: no bc what where you doing with that demon i thought you knew better
princess george: explain pls 😐
chal eclair: hurry up and explain bae, alex is spamming me and she’s fuming 😍
y/n: she’s spamming me too 😭
wifey lily: the girls gc is going OFFFFF
girlfriend kika: for good fucking reason
girlfriend kika: fucking explain yourself y/n
PIERRE GASLYYYY: kika’s so mad i think she might explode 😭
alabono: lily too 😭
chili!: well good thing none of them are here bc y/n would gotten assaulted
angel carmen: yeah
babygirl alex: exactly
girlfriend kika: what carlos said
wifey lily: hm.
y/n: 😟
y/n: meeting in george’s drivers room?
my baby lando: on my way !!!!
chal eclair: we all are
︴# ⸝⸝ : ★ real life ¡ ⌕ ⸝⸝ ﹒ ﹕
“everyone here?” y/n asks as everyone tried to cram in between two chairs and a sofa. “yep” carlos squeaks with charles and lando on top of him on a lazy chair, “yeah, mate” george says, him, alex, and pierre on the sofa while daniel and yuki shared the second chair.
“girls?” y/n looks at her laptop. kika, carmen, alexandra and lily were on a zoom call. “all here” kika gave a thumbs up as y/n sat in the middle of the floor. “girl.” y/n says, “oh, this is gonna be good” lando giggles, “so kelly originally texted me the day champagne, sex and anxiety dropped and i didn’t recognise the number” y/n began.
“i thought she was someone else because the number was unknown but then she was like ‘girl to girl we need to talk’, so i was a bit like, oh?, y’know?” y/n says as she passes her phone to the boys so they can read the messages.
“and when we met earlier, she was like-”
“sorry, did i miss anything?” lewis rushed into the room, seemingly a bit out of breath. “no, it was just about to begin” carmen’s slightly distorted voice says. lewis not so subtly checks y/n out, licking his lips, pierre and daniel give each other a knowing look with charles and lando give y/n a little smirk and she mouths ‘shut up’.
“is that a chair?” george chuckles, lewis placed a chair he had brought with him next to the sofa and shrugged, “well, i knew there wouldn’t be space here” lewis said as he set the chair down. he was about to sit when he notice y/n was on the floor, “wait, you come sit on it” lewis tells y/n.
“no, no, it’s okay” y/n smiles, “doll, i don’t want you sitting on the floor, it’s cold” lewis shakes his head. the rest of the drivers all quietly giggle and nudge each other as the girls text each other something about how lewis was calling you ‘doll’ in front of everyone.
“well it’s here if you need it” lewis says as he sits on the chair.
“guys, hold on, so, what did kelly say?” alex asks.
“yeah, she was like ‘i got your number from max’ phone, sorry to contact you on your personal number, blah blah blah, how was your day?’ all that, but that doesn’t matter” y/n continued, “bro, she’s breaking up with max”
charles gasps, “no, she’s not!”
“did he cheat on her too?” george asks
“here we go again” yuki chuckles.
so many questions were being asked all at once, “boys, shut up so we can understand!” kika exclaimed and the boys quickly settled down again. “they’re breaking up because of me” y/n added and the noise began once more.
“she better not be blaming that on you” lando rolled his eyes.
“what do you mean because of you? you didn’t do anything” carlos frowned.
“i just know he cheated on her” yuki laughs.
“oh my god, all of you shut up!” lily exclaims.
“no, no, wait, max has been, allegedly, loosing his mind. kelly said that ever since they announced their relationship, hes been obsessing over me. to an almost dangerous level” y/n begins again. “define obsessing” george says.
“kelly said that when heartbreak syndrome came out, he was hyper fixated on the songs. he would analyse each song, line by line to figure out which line are about him.” y/n explain. yuki’s eyes widened while charles, lewis and lando physically recoiled. “he also tried to send me a cease and desist because some of the songs were ‘too specific’” she added.
“and also-”
“no, hold on, can we talk about this? because my body had a visceral reaction” lando interrupted with a dramatic hand on his chest. “yeah, that’s a bit much” lewis nodded, pierre muttered something into his hands while carlos looked just befuddled.
“wait, y/n, there’s more? you said also?” carmen frowned. “yeah, so, remember when kelly used to copy me on social media, girl, hold on” y/n got up and began pacing around the room, “apparently, max was forcing her to copy me so she looked like the crazy obsessed one” y/n said, “shut up, no he did not!” pierre said, “girl, yes he did! because he was stalking my accounts with her account” she added.
“what the fuck?” carlos asked and daniel had a frightened look on his face. everyone in the room had shocked looks on their face as they stared at each other. all those months of what seemed like kelly copying and shading y/n was all of max’s doing. “she also said that when i signed with mercedes, he like, lost it.”
“lost it? or lost it?” kika asked, “lost it.” y/n answered. “he was up there breaking things, screaming, crying, just loosing his mind” y/n explained. “heh, he just like me for real” lando chuckled, then everyone glared at him. “i’m so funny” he added.
“did she mention the billboards thing?” daniel asked. y/n nodded as she stood next to lewis, placing a hand over his shoulder. lewis, almost subconsciously, wrapped his arm around y/n’s waist. charles and george smirked at y/n and she gave them a look that said ‘I will throw my shoe at you’. “kelly overheard max literally orchestrating the whole thing on a phone call with the red bull employees, and not only were they going to burn billboards, they wanted to burn the merch stands and my signing booth.”
“okay, what the fuck?” carlos asks again as the girls gasp. “oh? oh, he was serious serious” charles says as he half covered his mouth in shock. “what do you mean the signing booth? you could’ve gotten hurt.” lewis tightened his grip on y/n, as he says with a frown making daniel and alex nod in agreement. “yeah! that could’ve gone really fucking bad” yuki crosses his arms over his chest.
“I wanna say something crazy” y/n began.
“yeah, let’s not…” carmen said, “let’s use our critical thinking, maybe, just maybe, we shouldn’t do crazy things!” alexandra sarcastically giggled, “max was doing crazy things and look where that got him” she added. “depends on what the crazy something is” daniel said, “hey! don’t enable her!” kika scolded him making him raise his hands, “i’m just saying that if-”
“I want to talk to max.” y/n said, and everyone went quiet.
“what?” alex, george and carlos asked in unison, looking confused. “really?” charles asked as him, lando and pierre looked grossed out. “woooooow” yuki deadpanned, him and daniel were visibly upset. alexandra and carmen sighed in disappointment and lewis.. looked angry.
“you’re not seeing him” lewis said.
“but–”
“no you-” lewis inhaled deeply before continuing, “doll, he could’ve hurt you. you heard what his girlfriend said.” he said as he stroked her waist. charles and lando smirked at her, “what did I just say?! critical thinking skills!” alexandra frowned.
“y/n, babe, i don’t have the patience.” lily said with a huge fake smile, y/n put her hands up defensively; “but i have a plan, okay, here me out.” she says.
“okay, let her cook-” lando began, only to be swiftly cut off by george, “no! she’s done cooking for today. banned from the kitchen.”
“guys, oh my god, please.” y/n whined, “i just wanna ask him about some things!” she added. yuki sat up, “i’ve been saying, let me speak to him for months but no one is letting me near him.” he crossed his arms over his chest. “you’re gonna stab him, bro, no!” pierre half chuckled, “…fair.” yuki grumbled.
“there is nothing, nothing, that you and that sloth can talk about.” carlos began, “not a single thing.” he added. “but!” lando clapped, “okay.. devil’s advocate-”
“shut the fuck up.” the girls cut him off, and he placed the dramatic hand back on his chest.
“y/n” lewis said with a soft smile as he pulled her on his lap. george and alex elbowed each other while charles, lando and carlos tried their best (worst) to keep their giggles down, and yuki and pierre took photos to send to kika later.
y/n’s heart beat a bit faster and she founded herself at a loss for words, “you’re not safe around him. if there’s something you want to ask him, ask his girlfriend to communicate it to him. there’s no reason for you to break no contact after all he did. he’s disrespected you and your name in public, has stalked you, damaged private property with your face on it, do i need to keep going?” lewis asked.
y/n shook her head, “n-no, you d-don’t” she quietly answered.
“so what are you gonna do?” lewis asked, “not talk to max… privately.” she answered, he was nodding along, then he stopped. “you… what?”
“y/n, i will leap through this screen and stab you” alexandra threatened. “can we hear her out?” lando asked, “no!” the girls jumped at him again, the dramatic hand returned for a third time, “you’re just gonna let them yell at me like that?” he whined
“maybe you should hear me out!” y/n said, and there was a loud, collective of disappointment and annoyance. “and, yes, they’re your aunts, im your mother.” she answered lando.
“listen, next grand prix, all of you can be there, i just wanna ask him about the bullshit that he’s been doing.” she explained.
everyone looked at each other then at y/n, “really?” charles asked, “please?” y/n begged. “i’m in! sounds messy” lando giggled. kika chuckled, “no wonder you’re a PR nightmare.”
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hungharrington · 1 year ago
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okay sooo I read the steeb sending audios blurb and loved it and this is the more wholesome version but just imagine steeb who’s out w eddie and he’s out of his mind drunk sending u audios or even calling u to tell u what he’s doing every 2 mins bc he’s just so drunk and misses his baby 😭🙏 and eddie is just like so done w it
this is so damn cute 😭 and the reversal of him being the one out drinking? TOO CUTE here’s the nsfw blurb lol
At 1am, you’re doing the reasonable thing; sleeping.
Tucked up, having dozed off hours ago, you don’t notice the buzz of your phone on the bedside table. It lights up, face down, illuminating the 4 previous missed calls. You slumber on, unaware.
At 1am, Steve is stumbling down the street besides Eddie, his phone clutched tightly in his grasp as he pouts down at the screen. You’re not picking up.
“Steve, man, c’mon, they’re probably asleep,” Eddie’s voice of reason chimes in beside him.
He’s drunk too, just not nearly as much as Steve. A burning cigarette sits between his lips and he’s watching with amusement at how much Steve seems to be stumbling, too focused on his phone between his hands. Steve throws back his head and lets out a pained noise at Eddie’s words.
“S’just wanna- I wanna talk to my baby. M’gonna try it again.”
He punches his finger against the screen and dials your number. Steve squishes the phone against his ear and stops walking, his free hand coming out to grab a pole on the street. Eddie spots what he thinks is a cat, digging around in a trash can and perks up, crouching to start trying to make friends with it.
The ringing of the phone stops and Steve gasps in excitement, just for his heart to plummet when he realises it’s your voicemail. It’s nice to hear your voice but it’s also cruel; he still can’t talk to you.
He swings around the pole dramatically, the other hand still pressing his phone to his ear. When the beep to begin leaving a message sounds, Steve scrambles to think of what to say.
“Baby,” He’s got this faux stern voice on. “I -hic!- can’t believe you’re schleeping.” His drunken hiccups have started. He spins around the pole again.
“Sleeping! When I, me, Steve, your sweetheart, needs a kiss. And a hug. Both. I -hic!- miss you.”
This time, he spins around the pole too fast and stumbles to gain his balance, his eyes finding Eddie’s crouched form over by some trash bins. Steve giggles, relaying the information over the phone, “Eddie is- S’Eddie talking to the trash because ‘m too busy talking to you.”
He giggles again and when you listen to this the next day, you’ll have to pull your phone away from your ear because Steve shouts at full volume. “HEY EDDIE!”
There’s a scuffle in the background of the recording and you can hear Eddie yell back, “Look Steve! A friend!”
Then there’s a banging noise, like someone’s shoved the trash cans over, another scuffling sound as Eddie gets closer to Steve. It silent for a moment before Steve goes, “Oh my god, that’s a raccoon.” before the recording ends.
Steve has no memory of the voicemail the next day— but with how it sends you into stitches, sides hurting with laughter the next morning, it’s a permanent memory for you.
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lvrsparadise · 1 year ago
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'BLIND' - C.S
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| 'WILL YOU?' |
Synopsis - They're so in love with each other, they're oblivious.
Warnings! - Profanity, Y/N being head over heels for Chris (honestly girl me too), they both blind asf, the triplets are in Boston Y/N is in LA still, I think that's all.
A/N - This is basically an apology for my last fic. I am so deeply sorry for those I made cry, here's something to cheer you up. 😋😘😘 Also I'm going to start putting the animal they chose for tour 2 next to the name bc I think it's cool.
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This is so difficult. Who knew having a crush on your best friend would be so draining?
The guys just left for the airport and let me stay in their house while they're in Boston for the week. Should be easy, right? I mean I already crash here like almost every day. But being in a place that has essence of Chris, everywhere, makes it kind of hard to breathe.
I'm barely half an hour into Corpse Bride, the movie I put on when they left, when I get a notification from snapchat.
And for some reason, I find myself smiling as I open it. It's from Chris. A picture of him, hood pulled up and headphones over his ears with a little smile on his face. The words 'miss u already' at the bottom.
I save it to my camera roll. I mean, he just looks so good. Like all the time. How can I not? I send one back with a 'miss u 2' with a kiss emoji, as a joke, but not at the same time.
I focus back to Corpse Bride and get comfy on the couch.
----
I'm pretty sure I fell asleep at some point during the movie, because when I wake up, the movie is over and it's dark out now, unlike it was when the triplets left.
I walk to the kitchen and grab a bottle of water and sit back down on the couch. I pick up my phone and see multiple messages, snaps, and Instagram notifications from Chris. At first, I think something's wrong. But instead, it's just him updating where they are in their flight process, some funny shit Nick did, and multiple pictures of him, all of which I save.
The most recent one was a text saying he was going to try and get some sleep with the words 'I love you' at the end with a white heart and the kiss face emoji.
Now when I say I got butterflies and felt my face heat up, I mean I got BUTTERFLIES. How is he real?
I look at the time, it's 12:48, and see I was actually asleep for a few hours instead of just one. I turn the TV off and walk down to Chris's room. It's almost as if being in his room sent a universal message to him, my phone rings from my hand as I get comfy in his comforter.
A facetime call. I answer and is greeted by a smiling Chris.
"Hi."
"Hi."
"How's your flight been so far? You get some sleep?"
"Yeah, I got a little bit. But then some little girl started throwing a tantrum and woke me up."
A quiet chuckle makes its way out of me.
"Damn that sucks."
"What've you been up to?"
"I watched Corpse Bride, or well it watched me because I fell asleep."
This time he chuckles, and it sounds so, angelic to me. Especially in his sleepy voice.
"How close are you guys to Boston?"
"3 hours away."
"That's good."
We sit in silence for a few minutes, I scroll through Instagram, occasionally looking at Chris's face in the corner of my screen.
"You in my room?"
For some reason the question sent a new wave of butterflies in my chest. I nod.
"Yeah. I can't seem to get comfortable on the couch."
I'm not sure if what I said made him happy or if he saw something funny, either way, a smile is now on his face.
We spend the next like, hour on facetime, joking, talking, and just sometimes sitting in silence. Until I fall asleep.
----
I wake up the next morning, phone in front of me and still on, with Chris still on facetime.
By the looks of it, he's in the van with Matt, and they're talking but I can't hear it. So, he must be on mute.
I yawn and stretch before picking up my phone to see the time. 11:23. Meaning it's 2:23 in Boston.
I get out of Chris's bed and grab my phone, which I don't remember plugging in but is plugged into the charger and walk upstairs to make whatever they have in their cabinets.
Chris, having heard me moving-and-a-grooving, making a whole lot of noise going through the cabinets, seemingly unmutes and speaks.
"Good morning." I look at my phone with a smile as he turns the camera to Matt who says the same thing.
"Good morning to you two as well."
I go back to rummaging through the cabinets.
"Where did Nick hide the cereal? I can't find it."
"Cabinet above the stove, hidden behind the boxes of rice."
"Thank you, Matt."
I open the cabinet and move the rice boxes out of the way and, alas, the Cinnamon Toast Crunch. I grab the box and grab a bowl and pour some in before returning it to its original spot and then pouring some milk in and grabbing a spoon.
I sit at the table at begin to eat, while scrolling through Instagram, duh. I open Chris's story to a screenshot of me, asleep. I laugh and shake my head.
"What're you laughing at?"
"Why do I look so weird when I sleep?" I laugh out as I drop my phone on the table and lean my head in my hands.
"Oh. You saw that. You don't look weird; I think you look quite good to be honest."
My jaw falls open and I pick my phone up to see a small smirk on Chris's face.
I quickly shut my mouth and roll my eyes.
"What? All I said was that you looked good while you were sleeping. Wait- no that sounds weird."
"Yeah, very weird Chris." I hear Matt say.
I snort and finish my breakfast at the same time Matt pulls into the driveway of their house,
"How long you guys been home?"
"About 11-ish hours or so."
"You guys gotten any rest?"
"Chris went to sleep as soon as he reached his room."
"Matt! Don't expose me like that!"
I laugh at both the fact Matt said and Chris not denying it.
"Is that Y/N?" I gasp at the sound of Marylou's voice and Chris moves to his mom and shows her his phone screen. I wave with a big smile.
"Hi Marylou! Miss you!"
"Miss ya too honey!" I love her accent, it's so calming.
----
After about another hour of talking with Chris, Matt, and occasionally, Nick, we hung up and I turned on the triplets YouTube channel, even though I've seen all of their videos already, just to pass time.
It's so weird being here alone. And I'll be here alone for like the next week and a half.
Then, I get a though. What if I hid little things around Chris's room for him to find? But what would I even do?
Without thinking, I walk up to Nick's room and grab some paper and head back downstairs. I sit at the table and make paper origami hearts of all sizes, off of pure memory.
Once I've made at least 20 of them, I grab them and walk down to Chris's room and start hiding them in both plain sight and put some of the bigger ones in hidden places.
But there's a twist. Inside all of the hearts contain little messages and the biggest one has a confession on it. Don't know what came over me to write that but I did. And now I have to wait a week and a half for him to get home and find them.
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Tags ! ✮
@dwntwn-strnlo ✮ @ssturniolo ✮ @strniolo ✮ @20nugs ✮ @prettysturniolo ✮
If you want to be added to the list, all you have to do is ask ! ✮
Have a wonderful day and / or night :) ✮
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jungshookz · 1 year ago
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well, don't just stand there, stranger... come give me a hug!!!!!
hello!!!!!
i know it's been a long LONG time since i've posted anything on here but i can officially say that i have come home and also WHY did nobody clean up after themselves because this house is looking very dusty and the milk that i used for my coffee has curdled so someone please take care of that
all jokes aside i am back!!! i'm sorry for disappearing on everyone the way i did. if i'm being perfectly honest (because i always want to be honest with you guys) i'd gotten into my first relationship with someone who turned out to be pretty toxic and i'd completely lost myself because i was so hyper-focused on trying to make him happy and make the relationship work. i lost all motivation to write which was devastating because writing had been such a huge part of my life ESPECIALLY when it came to this blog and the lil community we made together.
i won't go into too much detail but i'm okay and healing now! i've missed all of you so much and i'm so excited to get the headquarters back up and running! i'm excited to talk to you guys every day again and get back into writing!! please excuse me while i get reacquainted with the blog and get settled into things.,,. if u notice any screaming from my office and glitching on the blog it's just because i'm bonking the side of my monitor trying to figure out how things work around here bc as u all know i hated technology in the first place and only know how to write and post and nothing else
and thank you to all of you who sent in or continued to send messages to me. it really means so incredibly much to me that you cared enough to say something and check in on me. when i left i didn't think it would be a big deal because people leave all the time but scrolling through my messages this morning i was like huh! maybe me poofing into thin air did a little more damage to our home than i thought!!!! i'll try to respond to all the messages but if i don't get to yours please know that i've read it and i see you and appreciate you!
i love you guys so much and missed you more than you even know! i'm ready to see where the future takes us :-)
ok seriously where's the mop bc there is a layer of dust on the ground
cee <3
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hyunin · 3 months ago
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hiiii everyone, this blog hit 1k followers the other day 🥹 tysm to anyone that has followed me here over the years! i'm sure at least a third of my followers are dead blogs from my suju (🤮) era in 2013 before i returned to gifmaking tumblr in 2020, but so many of you joined me once i returned and i'm so thankful for everyone that has reblogged my content and chatted with me and followed me up until this point! 🫶 i wanted to write some fun lil messages for my mutuals and pals below the cut, as well as shout out some people i don't necessarily speak to but like having on my dash also 💗 if u aren't mentioned on here and we're mutuals that doesn't mean i dislike u it just means i'm stupid and missed you 😭 before i get into the messages i also want to ask anyone who can to consider commissioning me for a gifset or writing by donating at least €10 to this fundraiser and sending me a screenshot of your donation! more info on that via this post. thank u so much again everyone!!! 🥳 (edit: i don't think half the mentions in this post are working so please check to see if you were mentioned even if you weren't notified!)
@redvelvetcult hi ele 🫶 i know we don't speak as often anymore but i'm always so happy to see u around and i love you <3 thank u for running yangjeongin with me even if it has been in spirit for 99% of its run LKJSDLFKJSJLKFD still wouldn't be the same without u @bataranqs hi kid! this is going to sound so lame but it's been rly fun watching u grow up over the years through awoo9, every time u use our weird ass humor it's so much funnier coming from u. thank u for hyping up everything we all do, especially my writing!! i really appreciate it and u @anyujins iwin...whew....LLKSJDKLFJLSKF i'm rly happy that we're a lot closer now than when we were last time i made one of these posts. i think we are anyway?? i forgor...but either way ilysm, thank u for your support when i've been going insane over the years and it would appear both of the stories of our love lives that we've been following for so long will have a tragic ending. LJKSDFJLKSLK but i hope we can be friends for many more moments of insanity to come and that we have more good news than bad news to share w each other soon. in the meantime it's always rly fun to talk to u and i am glad i have u in my life @miyawaki ver. i appreciate u v much if only bc u are a major provider of quality shitposts on my dash, u also being into kpop and giffing is a bonus. u are also so funny even if u are also MEAN!!!! it's funny most of the time. and u have also supported me a lot in ur own ver way over the years, and i can always count on u to give me feedback on giffing and such. i'm so happy for u that u are going to uni again and i hope u have so much fun but also don't forget about us 🔫 🫶 @seulggi gfx queen minya! u deserve a shoutout if ONLY bc u are carrying the gfx side of kpop tumblr on ur back fr. and i love seeing what u make on my dash. but u are also an awoo9er so i will give u a long AWOOOOOOOOO of appreciation ❣️ @meongppangz RI omg idk what account is best to tag u on so i tag u here. i rmr the last one of these i made i was like 'hope to talk more under better circumstances' and now we talk nearly every day LJSDFLKSDF i love that for us. thank u crazy person gc for bringing us together fr....love that we can bond over loving ggs and also hating collecting pcs and any other random shit of the day skz is doing. and giffing ofc. talking to u always makes me happy so i hope we continue talking and being friends for a long time to come 🫶 ily. also i'm going through my follow list for this in order of oldest blogs first and i just discovered y'all were one of the first skz blogs i followed. how cute @curiosityjams hi drea, we haven't spoken ages but i wanted to shout u out individually as well because i still enjoy seeing u on my dash and i still consider us friends 🫶 fellow eunbi stan...i will never forget waiting for the 2020 election results w you LMAO abt to do it all again soon...but i hope you're well and hope good things continue coming to u 🙇‍♀️ @hyunjinz agnes, backbone of stayblr that u are, i love u!! i know we don't Personally speak much at all i still feel like u are a dear friend of mine. you were one of the first ppl to support my skz content and i think you're that for a lot of people on stayblr and i think that is so sweet of u and also important for the community. u are so brave for going through the tags all the time and reblogging everything i do not have that kind of energy but i'm so glad u do!! i miss ur gifs but i'm happy that you're still around even when you don't gif. we're some of the last remaining pre-kingdom era skz ccs left 😱 so i will always appreciate ur company here <3 @innielove hi vi, i just want to say i love that u are giffing skz again. i've probably missed a lot of ur sets bc i'm bad at checking tags and dash but when i DO see them i'm like omg vi's gifs r really looking better than ever. thank u for returning to us 🫶 u have also actually been on stayblr for a long time so i'm always happy to see some of the oldies (can u believe we are oldies now...) back on the dash 😌
@kazuhas MS KALE it always makes me happy to see u on my dash here. ur gifs are so lovely and so are u!! i know we mainly know each other from off cc tumblr 🫣 but i wanted to give u a shoutout among all of my other tumblr beloveds bc ily. it's what u deserve @seo-changbinnies marie...another fellow stayblr hag at this point...u are still one of the funniest people on this site i swear. and i'm so glad u are still here and making gifs and blessing us w your funny tags. i hope u always stay just as insane, i love u for that <3 @seungs HI MIAAA we don't talk that much anymore but i wanted u to know that i still always love seeing u and your gifs on my dash 🫶 @felixies luna, legend of stayblr that u are 🙇‍♀️ i think ur work largely goes unappreciated by the fandom but u are an icon for keeping createskz running for all these years despite everything going on in ur life. tysm for your service 🫡 @huiracha marie huiracha...this is how i refer to u in my head btw. like 'huiracha' is ur last name. LKJSDFKLSKLD we have barely spoken but i want to give u your own shoutout just for surviving and continuing to gif on stayblr as long as u have. veterans' discount fr @hyunsung hi mona 🫶 we haven't spoken in a while either omg but i am still always excited to see u on my dash when u gif something or reblog something from me i'm like omg that's my friend mona :D SDKJFSJKLDF so thank u and i hope you're doing well 🙏 @hyunpic VILMA HYUNPIC...u know i am so glad we are better pals now. u are so funny and fun to talk to but also the sweetest ever!! thank u for always listening to me and being kind to me and also making me laugh. every time i feel like an rper named their hyunjin character something dumb i am glad i get to report it to u. some things only u will understand and appreciate. LKJSDKLJFSKLJFKLFD @sungtaro eri <3 we don't talk much anymore and maybe we NEVER HAVE??? but i have always felt like u are a dear friend and beloved mutual. i love seeing u on dash even if we don't have too many groups in common anymore. ur content is always lovely and so are u so we will always be pals as far as i am concerned 🫶 @exocean hi mo!! i must admit i don't have much to say but i wanted to mention you individually because you are so sweet and i love seeing u around and u deserve to know it <3 @hyumjim i don't even know what to say (positive) u know i am so glad ur squirmy wormy tag on one of my hyunjin sets brought us together. idr if we have ever properly spoken like via dm but bc u follow me on all my accounts i feel Seen by u....nd u haven't unfollowed me yet so god bless u. i always enjoy seeing ur thoughts and the posts u put on my dash whether they be a funny text post or someone's hot take getting dismantled or something Thought Provoking. my dash is definitely a better place because of u so thank uu 🫶
@wolfchans lau the Actual backbone of stayblr tysm for ur service fr. without u providing files for us i genuinely believe most of stayblr would be lost. not only do u do that but u are also genuinely very kind and make great content so i appreciate u so much!! thank u for making stayblr (and my dash) a better place @hyunebear hi adri i gotta admit i didn't even realize u were back on tumblr until i was going through my following and saw that u posted recently akljsdflkjdsf goes to show how much i'm on my dash...but i wanted to mention you individually even though it's been so long because you have genuinely touched my heart a lot and i will never forget ur compliments 🙏 ok maybe i did forget some of them word for word. but i will never forget how sweet u were to me. how about that. so thank you and i hope to see u around more!! i probably have to be on my dash more for that tho huh... @romanceuntold hi jen 🫶 i miss u on stayblr i'm ngl but i'm also still glad to see u on my dash through all your phases. you are such a warm and kind person and another person who i will never forget being so sweet to me. thank you and i hope you're doing well ❣️ @wearehappiness sidrah <3 the fact that we were both on stayblr but met properly on pc ig first is still so silly to me. me intending to wait on ur mail to get to me then being like 'stayblr perk i'll send ur mail rn' after i found out u were here LKJSDLKFLJKSF but you are suuuuch a sweet person who makes lovely gifs too. i miss ur gifs also!! and just you in general. wishing u the best in life always 💗 @mybodyfails hi oli 🫶 another person who has been soooo sweet to me, i'm so glad i got to help w leeknoween and i still have all the freebies u sent me from it preserved safely in my freebie photocard binder 😌 you are always lovely to talk to whenever we do, and thank u for reading my fic too despite zombies not being ur thing i appreciate u!! @strayklds / @facethesuns em i just think it's so funny that we like didn't speak before i invited u to the gif streaming server and i just did that on a whim bc u passed the vibe check and now i feel like we are good friends. despite still rarely speaking KSLDFLSDLKF but i love that for us and love ur gifs and seeing u around always 💞 @neohyune hi fae <3 i know us speaking is like a very recent development but i also wanted to mention u individually to thank u for your help 🙏 i need to write more of my fic tbh...but i Will be checking our conversation again for Notes. you also seem like a very sweet person so i would love to talk to u more in the future also 💕 @linoyes another very recent friendship (yes i am calling it that already) in my life, but thank u for your generosity, let's meet that fundraising goal together 💪 i hope we're also able to talk more outside of this context too. i just have a feeling i will have a lot more to say about u once i make another one of these!!
i'm ngl i don't know how many of you actually follow me here and i don't have time to check everyone's username individually so i'm just going to list a bunch of blogs i follow who may or may not follow me JKLSDFLKSDF but y'all make my dash a better place, thank u for all u do! 🫶 feel free to talk to me anytime too
@dazzlingkai @theseulgis @joytual @anyujin @cchuu @cherry-heartss @boynextdoors @hyunchans @ambivartence @minzbins @everglowz @chogiwow @ttathinker @minhosblr @minho-knows @yang-innie @leegahyun @bu99erfly
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junseotual · 11 months ago
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welcome, 2024 !! some messages are longer in the written version below.
as always, i wanted to thank my friends for, well, keeping me alive lol but seriously i say this every single year but you really. made my year. and i'm very grateful for that.
in particular, i'd like to thank my most beloved tuals (twtuals for the most part), thank you for dealing with me on a daily basis, i bet it's not easy !!
// in alphabetical order of the contact names!
[ashie] ; @geumibear
my ribbit !!! we haven’t spoken much this year, but your presence was always, ALWAYS very appreciated!! i’m also very much enjoying the crush saga … in my humble opinion he wants u SO bad ashie. so bad. also, belated congratulations for getting into your chem degree, my whittle alchemist (<- ik that’s not what u are but that’s cute so u hab to accept it sorry) i hope that you always always always remember that i love you very much even when we don’t really talk!! may 2024 bring u crush and uni successes <3 can’t wait to keep up w your adventures this upcoming year as well!!!! lob u
[biebear] ; @marklyluvr
dear bylan p baller! sorry, my BELOVED BIEBEAR <33 we were already pretty good friends (i like to think) but i feel like we’ve gotten much much closer these past few months!! (or is it just me. who knows) . either way i’m really glad for that <3 because idk if u know this (u better. this is a threat.) but i love you a LOT. sorry for making u deal with me recently kjdfksbdk but thank you for hearing me out (and giving me courage also) <3 also thank you for always playing along w me when i say dumb stuff ure so cute i lob u… thank you for always being so nice to me and for being my most beloved villaintual my ohseungtual so important to me what wld i do without u… please be careful on the road!! ure still a whittle biebear so people should let u do whatever u want when ure driving but i have a feeling that they won’t :( i hope that the upcoming year treats you better than this one, i love you!! my cutieful bieloved!! ps. kissie for lillie
[bnuuy / my gabi] ; @yangsminho
my biloved <3 i already said this recently but. i really missed you an awful lot.. an so i’m SO very glad that we’ve been talking a bit more these days <3 u falling for nicho (and subsequently fuma. and) was one of the best things to happen to me this year fr . i kiss u btw . sorry for being so needy and annoying sowwy for targeting u so often when it happens its bc i love u i can’t promise i’ll be less annoying next year hope u understand… also, sure, i only know your internet persona BUT i do love you a whole lot and. this is something i’ve said before but. your internet persona is still a part of You. and i would love you no matter how and where and when i met you, i promise. thank you for being my friend, and i hope we can continue that throughout the upcoming year <3 can’t wait to hunt down nichofuu at the korean clubs w u mwah!!
[founding matthewer / my iri] ; @seokmatthewz
MY IRI WHOM I LOVE my forest witch my cherry fox (og) my shrimptual my elf chef… and most importantly recently my zebitual ofc ofc ofc. founding matthewer. i love you. btw. if u even care. i think this year was a big one for miliri!! got ur twt n subsequently ur discord i feel like i won at life. i guess im also thankful to zebi for existing so i can annoy u more… or i guess ure the one terrorising me most of the time but. as u know. i don’t mind. (also &t i’m so glad u had no other survival show to watch im so glad u decided to subject urself to &audition i love the consequences of that so bad u domt understand) i’m really really glad that we’ve been talking arguably? more this year!! i hope you’re willing to deal with me next year as well!! also excited for the 2024 miliri jesus birthday cafe run, of course!!!!! kdfkjsdnjkd ps. may 2024 bring u all the shrimp of the world. right to ur door. and say miss blue that i love her. and ur honorary catdog also &lt;3
[léksie] ; @possession1981
my léksie whom i love <3 congratulations on your graduation hehe!! things are…….the way they are recently so i feel like we haven’t kept in contact as much as i wish we did this year but i’m glad that you’re still… here, yknow!! i love you very, very, very much and you deserve nothing but all the love in the world!!! 2023 was tough, i know, and i hope that 2024 treats you so so much better… if it doesn’t ill kill the universe actually. i’ll also be crossing my fingers for a potential miléks meetup (<- literally have not discussed this w u seriously but idc i’ll be scheming)(just between lovers marathon!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! when!!!!!!!!!!!) thank you for being such an amazing friend and role model, i really, really care about you and love you a lot. 
[loml / my brina] ; @aquablues
MY BRINA LOVE OF MY LIFE MY SUNSHINE MY RAINBOW MY LITTLE TULIP MY BRILOVED MY LITTLE STAR WHO IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME …. MY WORLD …. MY BABRI (baby bri) WHOM I LOVE SOSOOSOSOSOSOSOSOOSOSOSOSOSO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this year was a big one for you and i’m so, so, so, so, so, so proud of you always always always!!! i’m SO glad to see that your college life has been treating you well so far i’m genuinely SO happy that you’re having a good time like u dont get it i’m literally tearing up as im writing this?? anyways thank you so much for keeping me (and the rest of us) updated on your uni adventures i really appreciate it!! and as u know i would have been devastated if u just contact w me like i wld be so sad if u ever do that at least give me like a two weeks notice ok thank u… please remember that i love you i adore you i cherish you my brina!!! so much!! i hope you can continue to enjoy your uni experience in 2024 as well (without the annoying u-know-who this time). ps. i still have a jo to send u someday i just think i prob shldnt send it to ur home address considering ur parents??
[megmeg] ; @lunetual
my megmeg my beloved <33 thank you for helping me this year despite being so busie <3 even if we dont really get to talk i’m really really happy to have you in my life!! and thank you for making efforts to keep in touch despite being so busie i love u… i hope we can continue to be friends in the upcoming year hehe <3 ps. give kissies to apollo from me!!
[mr. meoweks] ; @awek-s
dear mr pawminister sir. i hope you’re doing well in this very busy season,, kjsfnksjdnfkksn hello my meoweks whom i meow (love) so so so meowch!! i thiiiiiink we might have gotten a bit closer this year and i’m very happy about that!! ik this year was definitely not easy for you so i hope that 2024 can be a much better year BUT! congratulations (yet again) on getting into ur phd program im sosoosososososososo proud of you genuinely SO proud!!!! i knew you could do it but STILL!! cant wait to be promoting ur anthology entry in the streets <3 also omgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomg……………… meowmeow (aweks millie) meetup i CANT WAIT head in hands im so excited u domt get it meoweks.. also i think its SO cute that u have little bunbuns now wtf tell them that i love them wtf wtf wtf they’re so cute i love them. ps. do tell me if u want me to send u the cappuccino or if u want to wait until u come over!!
[my danderion / my eri] ; @xiaojuun
my beloved eri… what can i say that i havent said yet at the beginning of the month lmao this is the hard part abt u being a december baby it’s like i don’t wanna keep repeating myself but it’s literally only been like 3 weeks. but it’s been. Very busie weeks also. it’s slightly sad to have u so busy (from a selfish standpoint bc … my ewi … i miss my ewi …) but i’m also genuinely very happy for you!! you get to do what you wanted to do where u wanted to!! AND ur not living alone!! u won big time i think!!! im also very very grateful that you’re making efforts to still keep me updated even when you’re so busy, i appreciate it a lot, really :< i love you (you already know this). and. as i said before. i am Very glad to have not a friend Like you, but You As my friend. also i hope u know that i’m taking my wittle pengeri (tuxedo sam) so so many places! in very important 2023 events i am also SO happy (and still so giddy. i am insane. and i love u.) that i got to meet you irl <33 one of my best memories of the year! thank u for being such a cute n nice guide i lob u… i hope 2024 treats you well and that we can !! continue!! to be good friends!! i love you lots <3 i really do. ps. give flo and vika a kithie from me if u can!! and sarabi too, the next time u see her <3 pps. i allowed myself to show my grandma meri christmas pics and she said ure pretty. shes right. btw if u care.
[my ina] ; @flops
MY INA WHOM I LOVE!!! i feel like every year my wishes of getting closer to u get realised !! and u have no idea how happy it makes me!! im also so so happy that u joined us over on twt im so so so glad im so glad u hab no idea im SO happy i can annoy u so much more now thank u so much… (also sorry). thank you for putting up with me and all the annoying things i send u .. its a love language (and for sending me my leo)!! i love you to bits… and yet again, i hope we can get even closer in the upcoming year <3 ps. milina meetup when
[my violet / my vyvy] ; @souladies
MY VYNAIGRETTE!!!!!!!! MY VYONCÉ!!!!!!!!!!! my violet my vyvy my viavy my vyvyney whom i love so so much my little mouse my fluffy cat my beloved fennec fox <3 i feel like we’ve gotten SO insanely closer these past few months?!?! first of all thank you so much for being my beloved dramamate <3 thank you for being okay with me live messaging u my reactions to wifty and piggy king, thank you for agreeing to (re)watch hidden love with me, thank you SO much for experiencing fiys with me, thank you (and paula) so much for welcoming me for that one insane extraordinary you episode, and thank you (and ro!) for watching the killy votey & kidnapping day with me as well!! thank you so much for always making time for me :< i really appreciate it. and more recently, thank you for being my line friend hehe <3 i really love talking to u a LOT !! idk if u can tell . thank you sm for dealing with me skjdnfksdnk i genuinely thought u were going to stop talking to me after that one piggy episode . anyways i hope that 2024 treats you well and that we can continue talking and being friends <3 also i’m very excited for the next vyllie drama, whatever it may be!! ps. tell paquito that i lob him
[pauby] ; @ghiblin
MY PAUBY!!!!!!!!! my capy <3 i lob u so much thank u for always being so cute and so nice to me!!! and thank you for allowing me into the pauney extraordinary you watch that time and for welcoming me so nicely i kithie u … i hope that 2024 treats you vewy nicely (or else!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and that we can continue to be friends <3 ps. tell ur kitty that i said hello pps. pauby to be honest i wld let u :O eat me . honestly
[princess roro] ; @sunghanbin
MY SUNSHINE MY MODEL MY PRINCESS MY BEROVED RORO!!!!!!!!!!! <33 big year for milro i wld say but also i feel like every year is… <3 thank u (and vyvy) for watching killy votey and the kidnapping day with me <3 thank you for being the girl with the prettiest smile ever <3 also just the most beautiful girl ever. i know things have been rough lately and i’m very sorry about that… i hope 2024 can bring you and your family good news! that aside, thank you for being my friend and talking to me and bickering with me and getting me into bonedo and for showing me so much love and for trusting me!! what i’m trying to say is!! i love you!! a lot!! my beroved!! and i hope you are willing to deal with me for another year <3
[puppie !!] ;
MY PUPPIE MY VENVEN MY VEN PARA whom i love. thank you for STILL being friends with me i feel like its been so long…. i don’t really know if you realize this but you’re a extremely important friend to me. genuinely. i think my life would be a lot more miserable without you. thank you for dealing with me despite everything.. amd thamk u for the kitty videos always!! i kissie u <3 i love you <3 i hope that you always remember that and that you Never ever doubt it. may 2024 treat u nicely!!!!!!!!!!! and i hope we can be friends for even longer <3 ps. pls tell my children (phantom max sassa . i feel like im forgetting someone if i am im sorry i am on my knees repenting) that i love them!!
additionally, thank you to my other mutuals that have spent this year with me!! my miha (@jaebeomtual) and lili (@ninqz) who have been so sweet ; my sarah (@wabisaba), my rosie (@kimjiwoong), my beluluved (@fushigojos), my sofsof (@yeofi), luna (@yunwooz), and my dee (@ryudaeng), who have been with me for a While now and stuck with me despite us not interacting much this year ; rachie (@gnanii) and mary (@dongkwan) whose contribution to the eri project i'm very grateful for (and they're amazing just in general as well but) ; as well as vivi (@moonsua) who's a beloved twtual &lt;3
and a special thanks to paquito and lavender ; phantom, sassa and max ; miss blue and iri's woof ; paula's cat ; eri's woofs whose names i forgot i am so sorry... & bestinez and sarabi, bestie j & ellis and florence and vika ; apollo ; lillie ; gabi's many many many animals ; grimm ; sammy and ashy ; brina's friend group. for being around my beloveds and for all the stories (amd cute pictures) involving them !!
as well as jinsung coming back bc this is my post and i can be insane <3 as a treat <3
credits!! [icons] // [ash pfp] // [bie pfp] // [gabi pfp] // [iri pfp] // [aléks pfp] // [brina pfp] // [meg pfp] // [aweks pfp] // [eri pfp] // [ina pfp] // [vy pfp] // [paula pfp] // [ro pfp] // [ven pfp]
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sugar-omi · 1 year ago
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Incoming ramble I wanna hear you’re thoughts on this cause it’s been on my brain for a little bit and it’s got me in my feels
K so I forget if it’s in the step 3 prologue or in the Drive moment but either way when on the topic of Cove leaving for Nevada every now and again and choosing how your MC feels about it there’s the option to choose that it makes you sad and nervous specifically because the little 8 year old in you (who remember was probably HORRENDOUSLY lonely) was scared that Cove was gonna leave and never come back
Now that option alone already gets to me (cause I relate to it hard cough cough) but just imagine the MC actually confessing to Cove about that fear!! Obviously the MC doesn’t want to make Cove stop going cause yknow he’s literally going to see his own mom but MC also can’t deny that there’s that sad lonely little kid inside their head who just doesn’t want to be left alone again so they’re kinda just stuck in the dilemma. But soon enough after feeling well enough to admit it they finally tell Cove about it and get to actually work it out!!!
It just- AUGH ITS GOT ME EMOTIONAL MAN I CANT-
cove would actually feel so relieved omg bc it makes him sad too and he misses you, ofc ik he says that no matter what but I think he also worries abt leaving n nevering coming back
very traumatized from the move after his mom n dad divorced n he tried to run away bc he missed krya, yk 😟
reassures you that he'll always come back, and that if that did happen he'd prbly try to run away to see you LOL
would offer to take you with him!!! if you're dating ofc you need to work it out w his mom a bit more than necessary but she wouldn't mind if you stayed over or came to hang out w them
I imagine krya spends a Lotta time at work anyway since she can't be on leave the entire time he visits, so she'd be relieved that he has someone to keep him conpany
he talks abt you so much anyway, it's like you're basically there w them already
if you can't or don't want to go with him, he'd video call you sm more
sends lots of pictures n texts and voice messages
tells you basically everything abt his day and sends gm and gn texts
NO VOICE MESSAGES
omg...
coves sleepy, raspy voice saying "good morning" (
sounds like this, would even call you sunshine like sonny did!!!😭😭
I'm falling apart
mmm if he's gone a long time he'd prbly even come see you, or meet you half way
which is stressful bc he has a long drive but he would bc he's crazy abt you
omg gives you a shirt of his.
BUYS MATCHING SHIRTS
omg and asks you what you're wearing every day until you say that shirt n he wears it like "omg!!! what a coincidence!!!!" babe we know u did it on purpose PLEASE
sends you flowers
n by send you flowers I mean asks his dad to pick up some flowers and deliver them to you
sends his dad money too but cliff would prbly pay for them once or twice bc he thinks this is so chge n send the money back to cove so cove is like "dad!!!" n just makes an order on his card bc his dad is so stubborn😭😭
cliff is actually in love w your guys relationship he's so happy,,, pls
I should write some hc's on how cliff feels abt you guys dating bc my man's is so happy!!!! pls. OK anyway
OMG YOU VIDEO CALL N EAT TOGETHER
will ask what you're eating n have the same thing if he can
OMG HE PICKS UP ONE TIME AND HE'S RUNNING ACROSS THE STREET N HES LIKE "WAIT DONT EAT YET I GOTTA PICK UP THE FOOD"
n you can just see his chin, the sky and then it's like kinda black n then for some reason u can see the floor and then he's like "sorry" and he starts running back to his car AGAIN
and so he delicately places the phone down n is panting n just goes, "sorry. I'm ready now" *throws his head back* "omg gimme a minute... man. climbing thru your window really came in handy"
KISSES THE SCREEN
big "mmmmwaahhh!!!"
or tiny "mweh", no in between
falling asleep on the phone too
WOULD TUCK THE PHONE IN.. OMG STOP IT
he's totally normal abt you I swear
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bluehwale · 2 years ago
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SO I was like travelling in bus for my.classes nd im usually a person in public transport who is like quiet minds my own business nd doesnt talk to anyone cuz maybe either om too sleepy or using my phone nd yesterday in saw this guy on my bus he was wearing all black suit nd he had his ear pierced (cuz men over here dont like to pierce their ears cuz its feminine 💀) nd that guy was standing in front of me I was like observing him like I liked men black tuxedo okay cuz they look so good 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵😮‍💨😮‍💨nd I was thinking of completing his outfit nd I was like contemplating whether should I or should I not nd I was get so FUCKING anxious 😭😭 like me who has never complimented a stranger (not even a women is going nd complimenting a MAN ITS A BIG THNG ND IM LITERWLLY MY MIMD EAS SO BUSY DESPITE RUNNING ON 4HRS OF SLEEP) nd ykw im the end I ended up complimenting him nd before my stop I said ur outfit looks really good nd I like ur bag too nd he was literally smiling ear to ear so cite nd before he could say smth my stop came I was literally SCREAMING THE WHOLE WAY UNTIL I FOUND MY SENIOR 😭i jad to pull my my shit together nd talk to him ndi after I finished talking to him I was literally screaming nd sending voice notes to my frnd (hey sending voice notes r a BIG THING nd I never send voice texts unless I cant type.out my thoughts nd to arrange them properly im a text message nd I couldn't call the fuck.down I LEGIT WENT TO RESTROOM ND SCREAMEDDDDDD WELLL im becoming more loose like ND WJEM I COMPLIMENT ITS LIKE I DESCRIBE EVERY ASPECT OF IT ND TELL IT TO PPL ND IT ENDS UP WITH THEM BLUSHING ND I WAS Literally TRYIJG MY BEST NOT TO STUTTER 🥴🥴ND I ENDED UP GWTTING SHT AFTER GIVING THE COMPLIMENT 😭😭😭💀💀LIZ IT WAAS LIKE A ROLLER COASTER ND I TOLD ANT THIS TO 3 OTHER FRNDS ND THEY ALL HAD fucking diverse opinions like 😞😞😞imma cotinue it in the next ask 🥴🥴
olay so I told abt my adventure to 3other frnds one of then whom I told first thought I jad a crush on the gut like a fleeting crush who im never gonna see again (sue was genuinely.confused olay so o said I just liked how he dressed up nd yes black tum 💀🥴🥴im on my knees okay )
another frnd I told (she is the most logical one) she said guys get less compliments than girls nd u just made his day nd said when u get dressed up nd someone acknowledges it u are jiet over the moon nd she was also proud of me for implementing a stranger cuz it takes alot of courage
thw last.frnd I told she said u go on doing this nd make.every guy fall for.u 😭 im like im an over exaggerator who compliments in a very descriptive way nd I cant change it cuz it what it is nd imo descriptive compliments >>>>one line compliments (idk why I prefer it )
anw liz have a good day taake care of urself.ilyyy (2/2)
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MISS DIORWOO!!!! IM ALWAYS THE HAPPIEST GIRL WHENEVER I HEAR FROM U <33 (my response is under the cut, u better bUCKLE UP !!)
HI HELLO SORRY IM??? ON THE FLOOR??? ALL BLACK SUIT WITH HIS EARS PIERCED???? PHEW 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨 U BETTER SIGN ME UP BCS I ALSO LIKE MEN IN BLACK TUXEDOS rawr (also i’d probably simp for u if i ever see u in a bus BCS U GIVE OFF THE MYSTERIOUS QUIET VIBES😵‍💫sorry oops off topic!! ANYWAYS) SMNDNDNDNS RUNNING ON 4 HOURS OF SLEEP BUT U STILL HAVE UR PRIORITIES STRAIGHT MHM I KNOW THATS RIGHT !!!!
ANNDNDB. FBDBDBSBSJJSJSS KYAAAAAAAAWQAAASSS WHEN U COMPLIMENTRD HIM OMGG FNDNDHDJ 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 HIM SMILING EAR TO EAR !!!! 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 HELLO THIS IS LIKE THE START OF A ROMANCE MOVIE ?????? A SCENE OF THIS (ghibli style) IS LITERALLY PLAYING IN MY HEAD RN I CAN SEE THE VISION OMG AND 😭😭😭 STOPPPPP HE DIDNT GET TO SAY ANTUTHING BEFORE U GOT OFF UR STOP OMGMDNDHDHD IM SO UGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH THIS WOULD BE A HOLLYWOOD HIT ISTG 😭😭 also
u: *internally screaming and dy1ng* 🧍‍♀️
ur senior: 😃👋 (HE WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND WHAT U JUST WENT THRU!!!!!)
ALSO URE RIGHT VOICE NOTES ARE A BIG THING!!! JSNSJSJJSHS I WOULD ALSO DO THAT IF I WERE U BCS MY HANDS WOULD BE SHAKING AND I WOULDNT BE ABLE TO TYPE 😭😭😭 (im hoping no janitors were traumatized in that toilet </3) ALSO YEAH UR COMPLIMENTS ARE SERIOUSLY THE BEST ITS PEAK BCS I BLUSH BEHIND MY SCREEN ALL THE DAMN TIME !!! JWBDJSJSJ
A FLEETING CRUSH WHO U WILL NEVER SEE AGAIN???? PLS DONT BREAK MY HEART NOOOO 💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔😞😞😞😞😞 (im gonna manifest that u’ll meet him again soon I HAVE MY PRAYER CIRCLE READY !!!!! 🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️) honestly,,,,, so relatable i too would get on my knees for any man who dresses well and esp in black (the bar is so low its IN HELL)
NAH BCS IM GONNA GO WITH UR LAST FRIEND BCS IM PRETTY SURE HE FELL IN LOVE WITH U !!!!!! WHEN U COMPLIMENTRD HIM AND UR GAZE MET HIS, THATS WHEN HE KNOWS !!! ITS U !!!! U’RE THE ONE HES BEEN LOOKING FOR (sorry im obv over the mOON THIS IS TOO CUTE) but yeah im also so 🥺🥺proud🥺🥺 of u for complimenting a stranger bcs that takes balls that i dont hv I MEAN IVE NEVER ATTEMPTED TO DO IT BUT IK I WOULD GET 😨😨😨 *sweats* 😨😨😨 AND “hi i just wanna say that i rlly like ur outfi- well would u looK at that cat over there!! aHaHahah” WOULD PROBABLY COME OUT OF MY MOUTH INSTEAD SNBDDNNSNS (i hv 0 rizz) but anyWAYS IT PROBABLY MADE HIS WHOLE DAY AND I KNOW FOR A FACT THAT YOU’VE BECOME “THE GIRL IN THE BUS” TO ALL HIS FRIENDS BCS HE WOULD FOR SURE TELL EVERYONE THAT HE GOT A COMPLIMENT FROM U </333333 (im suffering thats so cute) U’RE IMMORTALIZED IN HIS HEAD AND IN HIS STORIES !!!!!
i loVE the way u give compliments u’re literally the sweetest and i know hE thinks that too </3 im hoping for another adventure of u meeting that guy OR ANYONE ELSE IN PARTICULAR REALLY BCS EEEEEK THIS MADE MY WHOLE DAY I LOVED THIS SM SNSBDBDNSBNSS 😭😭😭😭
thanku sm for sharing this adventure of urs !!! 🥺🥺🥺 i missed u and i love u and i hope u have a great day as well !!! take care always <333
p.s. I NEED UPDATES IF U EVER SOMEHOW MEET THIS GUY AGAIN👹👹👹👹 UNIVERSE !!!! DO UR THING !!! 👹👹👹👹
hashtag my current mood:
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spidergwen-real-notclickbait · 11 months ago
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hello gamers here is another one of my infamous rants you can all ignore but im saying this all to countless people on Tumblr coz none of you know me irl so its less embarrassing but like...
I know ive complained about this before but ive had some realisations but im literally 21 tomorrow (in a few hours) and it still really upsets me that ive never had a relationship but ive been thinking about it and it literally is all my fault like... I have such cripplingly low self esteem I physically cannot believe that someone would ever be into me and just for example, there was this guy I went on a date w from tinder like a year ago now and he was rly nice but I freaked out bc he wanted to sleep w me on the fist date and that terrified me coz it was the first date I went on since I was assaulted so I just ignored him after that... but he messaged me again a few months later wanting to meet up again and I was fucking stupid and cancelled last minute.. like sorry for the long story but just an example of how I freak the fuck out whenever someone shows any interest in me.. and also I found out a few days ago that he has a gf now and I just hate myself sm coz that couldve been me yk?? but its happened so many times where someone asks me out or shows interest and I just reject them.. and then I wonder why ive never been in a relationship like it literally is all my fault.. there was this girl I was sort of seeing for a bit but she just texted me one day and now she's dating her housemate and there was this guy a bit ago that I really fucking liked but he messaged me at fucking 4am one day saying 'sorry for leading u on but im not ready for a relationship' and like???? why were you on hinge then??? and why did you spend all night every night for god knows how long saying how u can't wait to see me again???? like I know a relationship isn't the point of life but when nearly all my friends are in v serious relationships, like moving in together and talking about family shit, I just rly feel like ive missed out and I just wanna know what it feels like to love someone and have my heartbroken and shit like that what every other person I know has and... idk sorry this is so long its just rly upsetting me but I dont have anyone else to talk to coz I dont know anyone else in this situation sorry guys
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strawbrygashez · 1 year ago
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11 22 24 (on the first question list)
Hopefully I’m putting the right questions from the question list u mean! I can redo this if it’s another one I reblogged!
11. Who makes fun of the other for having a crush on them, and who has to remind them that they are in a relationship?
Tyler so makes fun of the narrator having a crush on him, even before they get together he can tell the narrator is always looking at him ‘in a certain way’ so he’s been teasing him with things like “take a picture. It will last longer” type of shit for ages.
But he’s still making fun of him when they have been together for years. The narrator will try to get something going and tyler will be like “ohh you want me so bad ^_^ that’s so embarrassing..” even tho they’ve been together for like 5 years. The narrator reminds him how long they’ve been together but tyler will just keep laughing.
22. Who is super bad at sexting? and who sends them encouraging messages throughout the day?
Oh my god the narrator is horrible at it. He wants to send tyler stuff as equally as sexy as tyler sends him but he’s so bad at taking pictures and talking very seductively. He will try his best though and tyler is just happy he knows he’s flustering him.. and even tho the pictures are usually bad, he still thinks the pics the narrator sends are hot too.
They both send each other encouraging messages!!! Maybe not “you’ll do great honey!!” ones but they’ll just check up on each other every now and then, the narrator will randomly tell Tyler he loves and misses him and is bored without him. Tyler is making jokes about how they’d kill the narrators boss if the narrator is having a particularly rough day with him.
24. Who starts random slow dancing with the other in the kitchen? Who holds the other just above the ground and kisses them?
I’m actually gonna do with the narrator for who would pull the other into a slow dance! I would have said tyler if it has just said dancing in general bc sometimes music gets him pumped up and has him jumping around. But if it’s slow dancing, the narrator is doing it if he’s REALLY tired but still can’t sleep. Maybe some crappy radio is playing a slow song in the kitchen and he’s just not thinking so he starts grooving.
Then tyler comes downstairs and is looking at him like wtf or is just trying to convince him to shut it off and come to bed but if the narrator is feeling goofy enough, he’ll just pull tyler in and makes him dance with him while he’s half asleep.
Either tyler pulls away and goes and turns off the music himself and then picks up the narrator to take him to bed.. or he will just roll his eyes and let the narrator get whatever this is out of his system. When he’s ready for the narrator to stop tho that’s when he dips him into a kiss since it will wake him up :3
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sunmoonjune · 2 years ago
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OKAY I WENT TO SLEEP WITH A SMILE N WOKE UP WITH A GIGGLE N WNET ABOUT WORK WITH A SKIP AND DROVE HOME W A LIL CHANT ☺️ bug 🥰 bug 🕺 bug 🙌 bug 💃 bug 🤗 KNOWING LTM HAD BEEN UPDATED HEHE
finally managed to wait until i had finished work to snuggle into bed and read and asdfgh ONE WORD INTO THE CHAPTER AND IM ALR SCREAMING OFC BUGS GONNA REQUEST FOR SAN I-
hj using bug's language to thank wy for bringing them both back home safe bestboi!hongjoong 🫶 and the fact that bug made a sign for 'home' but never drew it again after creating it bc she never had a place to call home but now she's signing it again and again for hj to know what a damn good leader he is hNNG
also sry i know it's a rly cute and touching scene when bug appoints yeosang to five taps but im also cackling imagining her fingers tapping rapid fire like eight times if she keeps naming the rest of ateez the same way HAHAHA bug's hand be like: 🫳👇👇👇👇👇👇👇👇 not me quadruple checking i had the correct number of finger emojis
peep the results of moonie's ✨research✨ to describe how san smells im kicking my feet uGH sanbug are FINALLY reunited in the softest way possible 'my san' and 'my bug' PLSSSSS
also HONEY ?? LOVE ?? BABY ?? DARLIGN? ? sWEEt GIRL ? moonie really slapping us left right up down front n back with the pet names. but nothing beats yunho calling bug anything related to little or tiny - im so biased for yunho and size differences 🥹
BUG REMOVING HER MASK AND THE TOWEL THE AMOUNT OF TRUST AND VULNERABILITY SHE IS SHOWING TO YUNHO IM SO PROUD OF HER Omg MG and then THE LAST SENTENCE ???????? THAT AINT FEEDING US BREADCRUMBS TO HER PAST THATS MORE LIKE A WHOLE ASS LOAF OMG i cant wait for you to slowly reveal more and more of bug's history
this whole chapter makes me want to punch a wall and sprint a marathon just so i can feel human again bc im a bumbling soft mess of goo and feels rn nobody touch me 🫠🫣🤧
everybody say 📢thank u moonie📢 for blessing us with such a long chapter and for all your hard work!! okay now excuse me whilst i go and reread ch 1-15 again 🫡
FOWFWIMFOENURG I'M CRYING I love messages like this!!! send me your reviews send me every thought you have about the chapter!!! I love love love it!! <333
hehehehe I too chant bug! bug <33 bug<3 (tbh this is san LMAO)
hongjoong used bug's language talking to wooyoung so instinctually I don't even know if he realized :')) it's just so natural to him now <3 bestboi! hongjoong indeed!! also might I add,,, the fact that yunho taught hongjoong the sign for 'home' even though bug had never used it,,, almost as if he knew that one day she might... :'))
also LMAO yeah I see it xD you really have to pay attention like,,, wait do it again I think I miss counted, how many times was that?? I think after yeosang the names will have different touches since after five it's going to get complicated xD I might throw in some other shapes at some point haha
SANBUG REUNION!!! 'my san' -- 'my bug' I was crying screaming throwing up writing that I swear <33 made myself so emotional I could cry
(also totally irrelevant,,, but I made my mom cry when I was explaining the meaning behind all of the boy's symbols earlier :') I was so excited that I just started talking about them to see if they made sense and seonghwa's made her cry :"D she thought it was so freaking sweet what he said about being reborn as a universe <33 like yeah I'm in love with seonghwa too xD )
the nicknames!! I really said ateez loves bug and what about it?? xD gosh san nearly outright admitted it and bug is like,,, he cares about me??? me?? huh?
bug took off her mask!! for the first time without needing to!! she loves yun so much <33 their trust in each other is insurmountable I swear I'm gonna cry -- the last line tho,, there will be more on that soon too D": it truly was a loaf size breadcrumb of her past, our poor bug <3
I'm so so so happy you enjoyed the chapter!!! thank you so so much my dear <33 I adored your commentary hehe thank you again <33
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kpophubb · 2 years ago
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Hi lovely ☀ I'm so happy to hear from you, this week I was literally checking your Tumblr five times per day with my tags. I miss you so much and this week I also needed you so much, but it's okay💛 I'm so sad that you are sick😿😿 I thought you recovered but you mentioned that you don't feel good and I'm just so sad about this(((
Honestly this week I have my period, and I have to take 💊 every single day because it's just so painful 😔so I think we could have some sick party together😹
I had an exam last week which I failed, but I was so confident but I failed and my manager was so stressful and is pressuring me so much😮‍💨🤕🥴
How were your weekends? Today is Sunday and I just don't feel anything ...tomorrow I have to start work again and it's not tomorrow even it's like in 6 hours(((
Today I talked to my grandma and the second time during this 10 months and she's not doing good and mental health is bad she's pretty messed up 😣😭I'm watching this one movie now and it just reminds me of some Horrors that have been through and how lucky I am to actually Escape. ironically the movie is called No Escape. The movie is so well done tho 😭😭💔😢🥺
I Never thought these things would ever happen to me.. or would ever happen in my reality 😔😔I am just so shocked that this happened and they're still consequences and I just don't want to be a part of this you know❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹💔 I wish all of this was just a nightmare and I wake up tomorrow and everything is like before
I actually wanted to send you a short message just wish you could have happy Monday and better week 😭😢🥺🥺🥺💛💛
Stay strong baby I am just so thankful that you exist thank you for all the love you give me💛
Thank you for hyunnies gifs and quotes 🤗💗 I miss you so badly
You probably have no idea and will never understand the way you helped me during this sickness period of my life😔❤️‍🩹💗 thank you so much for saving your hyunnie lixie. Please get well soon
🐁
Hi hi hi my love 🥺🤍 tumblr has been mean to me with my other asks since they crash when I make em too long (?) and can’t be edited later so here we go!😭 keeping it short but ilysm 💗 and value every little bit u say ~
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First of all don’t worry about me, I’m doing better now altho I skipped my medication yesterday bc I thought I got better but apparently it made my sickness worse and took away my good night’s sleep 💔 but anyway I’m mentally active now..how are you feeling baby?:( is your period pain GONE?? I’m so sorry for being ia I’m here now promise ☀️💛🫂
The movie seems so strong..and really pain invoking and lesson learning is it on Netflix? If so, I’d love to watch while trying to understand you..
Aah it’s getting hectic for you I can say :( no sleep and so much work 😭 but I really hope smh u get a break soon and can rest as much as you need anonie. <3
I can understand about the whole nightmare part. Altho I have not been in such an intense situation like you (that’s why I give it to u always that you’re super strong bc you are my love) but I have had super dark times too and I can relate to that part where I’d be terrified and cry myself to sleep everyday and beg whatever deity was listening to make it better tomorrow and make it all vanish..but everyday I woke up and nothing changed and that made me feel devastated and made me feel like I was better off gone 💔
but I sincerely hope like me a time comes in your life where everyday would feel as good as a dream where you keep wishing you never wake up from the happiness..💖 the things of the past will never really leave u and even tho the shackles are gone someday and you’re free to walk forward, the scary marks will still be there to your feet. But look baby, slowly you’re healing even if it’s at a micro pace, getting a job, connecting w your family member (grandma) and slowly getting up even tho the suffocating feeling still haunts u, it’s slowly leading to a betterment. Like this, I’m sure you will walk towards light, love and happiness soon. Just faith it till u make it okay??
exams Are shitty..and it’s so disappointing to fail after giving your best it’s like realising your best never amounted to anything but hey love remember what I told u? “Human beings are filled w crazy potential even if you feel like u gave your best today you could still wake up tomorrow and try harder.” So keep your chin high, take a deep breath and try hard again. 💘 every success comes with ten failures, remember that.
and lastly I’ll always be here to save u and pull you up just like lixie does for hyunjin. It’s a promise, not a fancy statement. And I keep my words always. I love you sm and I couldn’t add the last quote bc that post isn’t working anymore but it was..
“The world doesn’t matter. YOU matter. 💛☀️..”♡♡
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starjxsung · 5 months ago
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(🪲)
hi star, it’s been a hot minute since i’ve sent you a message and i hope you’re doing well. i haven’t been active on tumblr much because of school and life but i saw that you’re taking a break from writing and i hope it’s doing you well! take all the time you need, of course! i’m gonna reread the works already posted because i missed you a lot.
anyway, how are you?? are you eating? drinking enough water every day? sleeping well?
oh also, little life update: *tw mentions of abuse and dv* remember that girlfriend i had that i was so madly in love with before i disappeared? yeah we broke up recently because…well…she hit me. i’m still very shocked but i also feel like in hindsight i should’ve seen this coming. we’d been having so many issues for a while before that where she really got a kick out of humiliating me in front of other people and just overall treating me like some kind of emotional punching bag and she just didn’t respect me as a person. i think i stayed because i refused to believe that i was being abused and because i’m not good with change when i’ve literally merged my entire life with hers. but before i knew she’d come visit to me and my family and we’d started the day fighting because we had to pick my brother up from his school and she didn’t want to and then she literally lifts herself off of her seat while driving and boom. even after all that i stayed with her for another month before she’d left and i was finally able to admit that she’s abusive. and it sucks. i’m so so so sad but at the same time i’ve felt this immense relief. anyway i’m switching to online college and staying home with my parents to recover and piece myself back together. sorry if this is heavy, after the breakup i realized she’d literally alienated me from all my friends so i didn’t know who to tell :/ you can ignore this tho.
anyway, ilysm and please take care of yourself!
HI my angel you’ve been so thoroughly missed !!!! I’ve been doing good 🫶 took a little trip from tumblr as a whole and I’m enjoying it so much more again I love chatting with u all and I missed writing so dearly. This is truly hell site sometimes but heavy emphasis on the sometimes bc most of the time it’s fucking phenomenal
Also oh my god?? First off are you OKAY now and are you somewhere safe??? I am so so so beyond sorry to hear this happened :( I was rooting for you guys so often and I’m sick to my stomach hearing things turned out this way. It’s made especially difficult when things begin to change and everything was so different before… but please know that this is in NO way your fault and you did nothing wrong at all. The way you spoke of her was always so beautiful and unfortunately people can just be fucking shitty at the end of the day. That in no way reflects on you or your ability to hold relationships or anything of that nature. I don’t want you to put yourself in any scenario of wishing you did better or differently. You were a remarkable partner and the rest was not in your hands.
TW here also *mentions of death*: I knew somebody who lost their life at the hands of a domestic abuser. It was very jarring and I still think of her every single day of my life. There was nothing she could’ve done to prevent it, but I’m really sensitive to these things and ensuring that ANYONE is able to get somewhere safe when they’re in these scenarios. Please reach out if you need anything at all, know that you’re not alone in this and that I am right there with you on this journey to healing. You can always call my discord if there’s some sort of emergency and you need to talk, or message me on here or whatever works best. But make sure you’re in a safe place and away from anything that puts you in harm’s way.
I love you so very dearly and I have no doubt you’ll find somebody much better down the line. Right now focus on yourself and do the things that you love, be kind to yourself and know that she isn’t worth any of your time, energy OR of receiving your love. I hope she finds it in herself to be better.
I love you sweet friend. Thinking of you always 💓💝🩷💘💖💖🫂
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troutpopulation · 6 months ago
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part 2 of bday drama ohhh my god
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So Sophia and I are chill and I'm just focusing on having a great time and celebrating Dani. I forgot to mention but in the few days before Seattle, Sophia had started showing up randomly at my doorstep, one of which times I was going out to dinner with my boyfriend (who hates Sophia bc of how she's treated me) to bring me tea. Again. She keeps bringing tea to my house. It's very awkward and in the car my bf is like Are you ok were you expecting her? It's kinda funny (evil) that she couldn't show up here once when u needed it but is now like. Frequenting your porch.
Anyways in Seattle Sophia is completely sucking my dick the entire time asking me constant questions about my interests, laughing way too loud at my jokes, and like, almost ignoring everyone else which was embarrassing because we are there FOR DANI. At this point I still care about Sophia, I love her but I don't fucking like her. I don't want to embarass her or make her feel bad but I want her to stfu and leave me alone.
We were alone at one point and she started apologizing again and I was like ah. Uh. Let's keep that at home please lol! Time and place lol!
But anyways she kept asking me constant questions about my interests. Like one every 40 seconds. The questions get so constant I am like, not mad at this point but after the 6th question (one of which she WOKE ME UP) in the car to ask, I was fighting the urge to be like CAN We Play The Quiet Game? Let's see how long we can hold our breath!!! It was all very fun questions about geology and geotechnics but like fuck man the drive was over an hour long and she asked ONLY ME a question every other minute STOP TALKING LOL
She left a day early planned bc of her schedule she had a con that Sunday, and that Sunday night after going to a drag show and a club I call my bf to see how he and our puppy are and bc I miss him. Megan walks into the room and she's like he's still on the phone right? He says hi.
She says hey uh. Sophia just messaged me and said she wants to talk to your bf about planning something for your bday. My jaw drops.
I invited her reluctantly to my bday plans as a formality so I didn't completely exclude her and break up the group. But only if multiple ppl came and I didn't need to talk to her. Most people are going to Fanimecon or working on my bday so I canceled my bday plans. And so she has now taken it upon herself to plan my bday for me as a sort of "look what I did for you take me back!!!" Thing
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wiltedprimrose · 8 months ago
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EPISODES OF MY LIFE.
———— ONE.
im shameless, i know. i just cant get over it. i just want you to know that you left so much memories in me. there are so many things and places which remind me of you. it feels like i cant even live my normal life ever again. i sometimes struggle to even catch a breath. still remember how much i trembled that night. losing weight, cutting my hair short. i dont know, perhaps thats just hows life after break up. dont worry, im getting better now.
i have so many things i wish i said and did to you back then. i regret i didnt do any of that just because i was too embarrassed if i look like i love you too much in front of you. yet here i am, dare to hope you only take the good memories when youre with me. such an irony while i might be hurting you more than creating good memories with you. im sorry.
if later in life you dont seem to find anything youre looking for in someone else, come back to me. i might still standing at the same door, waiting for you. i’ll be welcoming you with the warmest hug i could give. i promise i’ll love you better.
i hope you can go back to the life before you met me. you dont need to lie just to make me feel good anymore—im sorry if you thought you need to do it when you were with me—im sorry if being with me made you unable to express your true self. and while youre doing that (going back to the life that you had before), i’ll also try my best to move on with my life, living a better life. spent almost 3 years with you made me learn so many great things. thank you. i wish i could be with you longer because everyday i just want more of you. i dream about the day where i can fully live my life with you, share and discuss our thoughts whenever we want to, listening and to be listened, doing fun things together, waking up and feel safe because i’ll get to see your face every morning. i wish there would be a way to make “us” happen again. i wish i could be with you longer.
im sorry. youre always be enough for me.
eat well. live well. have a good life.
———— TWO.
life after break up sucks. what about the time when i miss you too much? what should i do to fill the void after you left me? never imagined there’d be a time for me to keep on going living my life without you in it.
can i call you?
i really want to hear your voice.
oh, life after break up sucks. i cant even call you whenever i want to and tell you about my day. i cant even send messages to my friends, especially guys because i dont feel comfortable texting them. i have nowhere to go. i miss you so much.
i wish i could be with you longer.
turns out i love you too much to the point im irrational sometimes.
———— THREE.
just a mess. my messy thoughts. i’ll just write whatever that popped in my head.
why do i love you so much it hurts… i tried to think about your bad habits, bad treatments you gave to me while we were together, and yet i failed to be mad at you. i found myself hoping for you to come back again. i want you. it felt right when i was loved by you. trying hard not to call you for only god knows how many times. i hate when i relapse while im at work, my mood suddenly drops and i feel empty inside. cant we meet up just for me to have some closure? i wake up every morning just to be reminded that youre not here with me anymore. cant we just try again and rethink about everything? fuck i hate it because every corner reminds me of you. why did you left so much memories in me I JUST CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE. day by day those memories make me feel miserable. i want you and only you. WHY DID YOU THINK YOU CAN LEAVE ME JUST LIKE THIS? WHY DID YOU NEED SO MUCH TIME TO REALIZE THAT WE ARE NOT MEANT TO BE? so cruel. bringing up my old mistakes, made me feel guilty and blaming myself. i believe we already talked about that and i thought you were okay with it? i left it all in 2022 and never want to do it again because I KNOW IT HURTS YOU. only have my eyes for u bc i dont want to hurt you again. whenever i chatted with a guy it felt like i cheated on you and thats why i dont really replied to them. I RESPECT YOU AS MY BOYFRIEND. about that one specific person you’ve always mentioned, it happened when that bitch dmed me about you. i thought i wouldnt want to be in the middle of other’s relationship so i left you. I DIDNT WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT NO MORE BC I KNOW YOURE UNCOMFORTABLE. i said it was okay and it was your past so i never want to talk about it ever again. I RESPECT YOU. im responsible with what i chose. i tried to change my way of seeing things and learned about everything you dont like. when you stood me up that time bc you suddenly said you couldnt make it to my office while im waiting for you to bring my flashdisk, remember what did i tell you? i told you it was fine. i wasnt angry nor badmood. bc i was fully aware that you might had important things to do. you also hate it when i complained. I LEARNED ALL ABOUT YOU AND TRIED HARD NOT TO DISAPPOINT YOU. i learn to be a better person. i learn to be more patient and think about whatever you said to me. after you said you hate when i complained about you being late, i never got angry whenever someone makes me wait for them. i left my ego. but you didnt want to see it as my effort. you always thought your effort always bigger than me, no? and YOU? constantly reminding me about my past mistakes, made me feel bad about myself. think about how many promises you gave to me and now you think you just can go away with it and YOU REALLY THINK I’D EASILY FIND SOMEONE NEW? lol. i guess im really that cheap in your eyes. LITTLE DID YOU KNOW YOUR PAST TRAUMATIZED ME. THATS WHY IM SO WORRIED WHENEVER YOURE OUT OF THIS TOWN. im happy when you updated me and told me whatever you were doing that day. i just cant forget about that dm. it was terrifying. you never want to share everything to me while i always shared every little thing with you. was afraid you’d find someone else who could listen to your problems better than me. about your parents, if your fam talked to me how theyre mad at me bc youre the only one who initiates to become closer to my family, youre the one who initiates to bring me closer to your family, im quiet sad bc you do know i never go to your town even after my dad moved there. but once my family had a plan to go there, i automatically think about your family. i even bought a new cloth and ordered so much snacks bc i was excited to see your parents. you knew about it. sadly at that time i suddenly couldnt go there bc my car broke and need to be repaired. my dad went home and brought all the snacks i ordered that day. that night when i visited your house bc i know your parents there, did you tell me to do it? no. i planned to go there myself bc i wanted to see your parents so that they know im serious with you. i want to be with you.
i often said sorry to you bc i know i couldnt reciprocate all things you gave to me. you said it was ok so LET ME ASK YOU, whats with the change of heart? bc when you decided to leave, i just read contradictions in every reasons you pointed out and all the things you said to me when we were together. you just wanted to justify your decision.
you know i didnt want to be with you since day one. i rejected you many times. i wanted our relationship to end since day one. i told you to find someone new since day one bc all we did just argue with each other. BUT YOU REFUSED. you asked for a chance, second chance, and so on BUT WHEN I FINALLY GAVE IN AND FELL HARD, you decided to leave. and when i asked for a chance, you didnt even want to give it to me. funny bc after all these times you always said we could always communicate yet this time you chose to not to do it. ive only known you for almost 3 years—a short moment—so i thought it was normal for us to have different opinions. like what you said to me, we could always discuss.
you just left me here all alone in the dark while blaming myself and you think that i could go on just fine with my life. being with you used to be my dream. now that it shattered, i dont know how my future would be. you dont know how it feels like whenever our friends asked me about you. you dont know how it feels like to relapse whenever i finally thought i’d be just fine without you. you dont know how hurt it is when something which once was your biggest dream has to be buried.
———— FOUR.
im tired of feeling this way. never thought i need you so much. cant we just go back together?
———— FIVE.
one last cry.
heard about you from a friend. they didnt tell me before bc they know i’d be sad. now i know and i dont know how to feel about it. stupid me for begging you to stay in my life. stupid me. whats the point of trying to change things we cant change? stupid me. but i guess it is what it is. i’ll deal with it on my own. please be happy with whatever you choose to do with your life.
guess it’s time to put you out of my mind and start anew.
god bless.
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