#mentally ill men<333< /div> Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[smutinlove]

men and their slutty waists can dominate me anytime.

[666godsperfectidiot]

Xmen evolution scott summers appreciation post <333

[ghostlywhiskey]

pov: price sends u a selfie while he’s away hours after u begged him to and he didn’t see the point since u had photos on ur phone together but he cannot say no to you<3333

[rawliverandgoronspice]

oh no I stopped working for five minutes and remembered I love he...................... ;;

[autism-corner]

i dont want to lose weight bc what if a pretty boy needs to cling to my arm or sit on my lap?? then where would they go?

[lottins-only]

THE ALCHEMY | PART II

pairing: kylian mbappe x fem!reader

word count: 3.9k

warnings: swearing, mentions of mental illness

A/N: thank you to those who read the first part. let me know what you think of this one <333

summary: working at real madrid is a dream come true— until kylian mbappe, football's biggest star and the last person you ever want to see, joins the club. as tensions rise between you two and the lines between frustration and fascination blur, you wonder: can you truly resist the man you've sworn to hate?

PART ONE

mallorca is a great place to let loose, have fun, bask in the sun. mallorca is not a great place to be stuck in a meeting with your ex-one night stand and his lawyers, discussing the nitty gritty of his salary and bonuses.

It’s little over a month after kylian’s presentation, and only a couple days after the men’s first team won the super cup in warsaw. you and a handful of others from the finance team flew out to mallorca for the match, and most importantly, for the post-game meeting with the club's leadership. that in itself lasted two hours and was draining, but last minute, you got dragged into this impromtu session with kylian and his lawyers. you don't even know why, to be honest. you're not familiar with the finer points of his deal, since that was your boss' responsibility.

anyways, here you are in one of the conference rooms in the hotel where the team's staying, completely zoned out as your boss speaks. your eyes zero in on kylian, who's just as bored as you, albeit hiding it way worse. he's absentmindedly doodling on a notepad while his lawyer next to him listens attentively to your boss. he's left handed? what a pick me, you think.

as if he can hear your thoughts, kylian glances up and shoots you a wink when his gaze catching yours. you're even more annoyed now. after you reminded him about the disappointing night you shared, you expected at least a little embarrassment from him the next time you saw him. but no, he was completely unfazed when you walked into the room and shook hands with him and his lawyer, and now he's being playful, maybe even a little flirtatious with you. the man is truly shameless.

"...so that will be the figure you'll receive as a bonus if you ever win the ballon d'or as a real madrid player" you catch the end of your boss' words.

"let's hope that's never happening" you mutter under your breath.

you freeze when you realize you've said that louder than you thought.

kylian’s eyes twinkle in amusement. “sorry, what was that?” he asks, leaning back in his chair and twirling the pen in between his fingers, clearly enjoying your slip up.

"n-nothing" you stammer, avoiding looking at your boss who's going red with anger.

your boss continues droning on and on about sums and figures, and an hour or so later, when he declares the meeting finished, you slip out of the room quickly. you don't want to exchange another word with him at all.

a while later you’re at one of the hotel lounge areas, staring blankly at yet another excel sheet when your boss slides up to you with a solemn look on his face. 

“we need to talk” he says.

you know exactly what he’s going to say. in fact, you’ve been anticipating this conversation ever since all the players returned to training and the season started.

you hold up your hand. “before you start, i want to say sorry for what was said when... when he visited. it was totally unprofessional, and i should’ve kept my mouth shut. I’m honestly really lucky you were the only one who overheard.”

he rubs the back of his neck, a relieved look on his face. “ i'm glad you brought it up, y/n. honestly, who cares how long it took the guy to get here, or how much he cost? the important thing is he's here now. he's gonna win us games, and he's sure as hell gonna bring in a lot of cash. so don't dwell on the past, okay?"

you nod along. you don't tell him that a few months ago, this would've been your perspective as well, and you don't say the real reason you hate kylian, because, well, it would be a little tmi to share with your boss, wouldn't it? nonetheless, you enthusiastically express your agreement, ready to move on from your blunder.

"oh, and please, try and make amends" he adds. "i've heard through the grapevine that he mentioned to the coaching staff he wasn't happy with the reception he got from a certain someone in the finance team"

"he didn't mention any names, nor did he file a complaint" he quickly adds at the panicked look on your face. "but you have to be careful with big personalities like his... just apologize if you get the chance, and then keep your head down" he pauses, sighing. "you're my best analyst, y/n. i don't want you to get into trouble over something like this"

"i understand" you reply, voice steady even though you feel anything but. "i'll handle it. whatever it takes to smooth things over. thank you for letting me know"

after he leaves, you bury your head in your hands, groaning. what did i get myself into? you think

a couple days later on a warm madrid evening, you find yourself at the front door of a pretty villa on the outskirts of the city, one hand ringing the bell and the other holding a bottle of wine. you're here for a dinner party hosted by rafael, one of the physiotherapists working in pintus' team. he's a decade or so older than you, but you two struck an unlikely friendship a couple months ago when you were the only two people to join the book club set up by hr to 'enhance company culture'. he's kind and easy to talk to, so it was a no brainer for you to accept when he extended the invitation.

the door swings open, and rafael greets you enthusiastically, giving you a small hug and ushering you in. as you follow him inside the house, you nod hellos to the few familiar faces you see, though you don't recognize most of the people because you don't work with them directly.

"why don't you get yourself a drink?" rafael says as he guides you to the living room, where there's an assortment of drinks laid out on a table. "i still have to finish up in the kitchen. make yourself at home ok?"

you nod, nervously glancing around as he walks away. you’re not socially anxious, but you’re not used to being the youngest person at a social gathering by several decades, either. you start pouring yourself a glass of wine but pause when you hear a familiar laugh.

you glance up, and of course he's here.

kylian stands in the corner of the room, drink in hand, casually leaning against a wall. he's deep in conversation with brahim, laughing at something he said. you're immediately infuriated by the casual confidence he exudes, the magnetism that seems like second nature for him. he's dressed in a simple black t-shirt and jeans, and you're horrified at the wave of attraction that hits you when your eyes catch the way the fabric clings to his bicep, or the way his fingers grip his glass. you're just ovulating you think to yourself, trying to remind yourself of the horrible night you shared – something you should never want to repeat.

you look away before he notices you staring, heading over to a group of people that seem friendly enough. you start chatting with clara, a lovely older lady who works as a receptionist at the training center. when you mention how old you are, her eyes light up.

"oh, there's a couple boys your age here. you have to meet them, they're the sweetest." she starts leading you towards another corner of the room, and your heart sinks a little when you realize who she wants to introduce you to. sure enough, clara stops in front of kylian and brahim.

"kylian, brahim – meet y/n" clara beams.

brahim greets with a warm handshake, but kylian only stares with narrowed eyes, eyes scanning your face for something.

"I take it you two know each other already?" clara asks, pointing between you and kylian.

"yes. we know each other" kylian says, voice cool.

" how wonderful!" clara says, blissfully unaware of how you know each other. she turns to you with a smile. "then y/n you must already know how much of a gentleman kyky is. the other day, he gave my grandson a signed shirt and a tour of the training center! he made that little boy's year, i tell you"

a gentleman? you almost snort. that must be a bad joke.

kylian glances at you, waiting for your reaction, his gaze almost daring you to contradict clara's words.

"that's...nice" you force out weakly.

clara leans over and pinches kylian's cheeks. "he's a real sweetheart our kyky. such a kind soul."

kylian shrugs humbly. " i'll never say no to kids. they're special"

clara coos even more, completely charmed by him, before excusing herself and walking off to greet a friend who just arrived. you grow frustrated as you watch her go – how can someone who left you feeling so insignificant be seen as this perfect figure by everyone else?

"your strap" kylian mutters, suddenly leaning closer.

"huh?"

without another word, he reaches up and adjusts the spaghetti strap of your top that had slipped off your shoulder. his fingers brush lightly against your skin, and without meaning to, you hold your breath. the sensation is infuriatingly gentle, his touch lingering longer than necessary. you don’t let out the breath you're holding until his hand leaves your skin.

"wait, how do you guys know each other again?" brahim, who was watching closely, asks rather curiously.

"old friends" kylian responds quickly.

brahim looks between you two suspiciously, then seemingly decides to let it go. he claps kylian on the back. " so, y/n. think we'll be back to back champions of europe now that this guy's joined?"

"depends" you shrug, taking a sip of your wine. your mind is elsewhere; you're still recovering from his hand on you.

kylian's jaw tightens in annoyance. "why? you don't think i can pull weight?"

" i didn't say that" you say smugly. "but out of everyone in the squad, you do have the lowest success rate in that particular area"

brahim, sensing the tension, quickly changes the subject before kylian responds. they start talking out about recovery routines after matches, and you zone out completely.

when rafael announces dinner is ready, you get a lightbulb moment: this is the perfect opportunity to politely apologize to the guy, as your boss suggested, so he doesn't get you fired. you say sorry tonight, and then you stay out of his way forever. because no matter how much he hurt you, confronting him every chance you get is definitely not worth losing the job that you worked so hard to land.

you stride over to his corner of the table and pull the chair right next to him. he only turns to look at you when you sit down, and it's comical how the smile on his face is completely wiped.

"hi" you say sweetly.

"...hi?" he peers at you suspiciously.

"listen, i–"

"you have a stain right there" he smirks, pointing at a small wine stain on your chest. " honestly, how many tops do you go through in a day? do i need to lend you some cash for the dry cleaners?"

your jaw drops. did he just call you poor?

"why do you stare at my boobs so much?" you whisper back, unable to help yourself.

"what?" he scoffs. "i don't do that"

"you do" you mutter. "only explanation why you notice every fucking imperfection on my clothes"

"do you want me to stare?" he smirks.

"no thanks" you say "i'd rather chew denim"

"pity" he says, flashing you a grin. "i thought maybe you wanted a re-do of that night in paris"

you look at him like he's crazy. "why would i–"

"i'm probably the best you've ever had" he shrugs.

you snort. "quite the opposite actually"

he physically cringes for a second before rearranging his features into a look of casual confidence and winking at you. "okay, that wasn't my best moment. but it's exactly why we need to have a redo"

you stare at him confused. one second he's insulting you, and the other he's hitting on you? you don't understand this man at all.

you don't responding but instead focus on the toast rafael is making to the whole table. you two don't speak for the rest of the dinner, him conversing with brahim and you with your seat neighbor on the other side. at some point, he excuses himself from the table and doesn't return.

at the end of dinner, you find your happy and satisfied, both with the food and the company (well, excluding kylian). you didn't manage to apologize to him like you planned, but whatever. he'll forget about you soon enough; at least that's what you hope.

before you leave, you wander upstairs to look for a bathroom to freshen up. the house is big, with the first floor lined with several closed doors. there's no sign of where the bathroom might be, so you decide to try your luck with the room closest to the stairs.

you stop dead in your tracks at the sight in front of you when you push the door open. kylian sits on the edge of the bed in what seems to be rafael's bedroom, judging from the pictures on the bedside tables. he has his phone in his hand, completely absorbed by whatever's on the screen. his head immediately snaps up at the sound of the door opening.

you frown. “what are you doing in here?”

“watching a game” he says, like it's the most obvious thing in the world.

“you can’t go a couple hours without football?” you snort, leaning against the door frame. “you really are dedicated”

“my little brother’s playing” he says quietly. “it’s is his first game with his new team”

you sense something in his tone, a hint of longing and vulnerability. for the first time, it hits you: he's new here. madrid might've been the dream, but he's alone in a new city, away from his friends and family. he’s probably missing his loved ones, you realize, but you quickly shake the sympathy away. I’m here to deliver a fake apology and leave you remind yourself not feel bad for him.

you swallow, shutting the door behind you. he raises his eyebrows, but he locks his phone and meets your gaze.

"kylian" you start your practiced script while you take a seat next to him on the bed. "i just want to say i'm really sorry for what i said the day of your presentation. it was uncalled for, and not to mention unprofessional. we may have an...unpleasant past, but that's not an excuse for the way i handed things. so, again, i'd like to apologize and put that behind us, if you're willing"

he stares at you for a long moment then bursts out laughing. "that's the fakest apology i've ever heard. did they threaten your job or something?" he pauses, eyes gleaming as he leans forward and clears his throat, putting on a childish voice. " 'kylian, please say yes to this apology i'm only saying because my boss told me to' "

"that's not what i sound like" you say, face burning.

"you're right. your voice is way more high pitched" he smirks.

you close your eyes, trying to keep the irritation off your voice. " oh my god, kylian. can you just say we're good so we can move on with our lives?"

the smirk on his face is replaced by furrowed eyebrows. "are you listening to yourself? you're literally scolding me for not accepting your apology"

"well what choice do i have?" you grit your teeth. "you're not listening to me!"

"because of how you act, y/n" kylian raises his voice. " you go around insulting me in front of my new teammate, even my fucking lawyer. you think you know me but you don't"

you hadn't realized it, but you're sitting much closer to each other, faces inches apart. the tension between you two is thick, and for a moment you swear you see his eyes flicker down to your lips briefly. you don't have time to dwell on it though because his phone suddenly pings loudly and you both jump apart.

kylian's face spreads into a smile as soon as he sees the notification on his screen.

"ethan assisted a goal" he announces, tone full of pride. he lets out a triumphant laugh, and your anger slightly subsides at the happiness in his voice.

"do you miss him?" you ask after a moment.

"yeah. a lot" he admits, not meeting your eyes.

there's a moment of silence, and you're about to awkwardly change the subject when he continues, voice unsure. " i've lived away from my family before when i was younger, but never in a different country. this is new. i kind of feel... lonely"

"don't we all?" you murmur.

"what do you mean?"

you sigh, shrugging. "i think it's more common than you think. we're all lonely in our own little ways. whether you've moved to a new country or not. some of us just hide it better"

"do you– what about you? have you ever felt like that?"

you think back to the months you couldn't get out of bed. when you felt like no one understood you. yeah, you definitely know what lonliness feels like.

you nod wordlessly. he doesn't ask more questions, which you appreciate.

you clear your throat. "what do you miss most from home?"

a small smile starts playing on his face. " i miss my niece and nephew. here look–"

he taps his phone and shows you the wallpaper on his lock screen. it's a picture of two adorable little kids, a boy and a girl, grinning widely at the camera.

"aww" you coo. "they're so cute!"

"i know right?" he stares at the picture fondly, a slight look of longing on his face.

you didn't expect he'd be the type to wear his heart on his sleeve, especially given his playboy reputation. you think back to clara's words from earlier in the evening, about how good and kind he is, and something tugs at your heart. the thought slowly creeps in: maybe one awful night wasn't enough to fully know someone's character. maybe there's more to him than what his exterior showed.

"i'm sure they're super proud of their uncle kyky, killing it at his dream club" you say teasingly.

he chuckles. "i feel like a part of you just died calling me kyky"

"oh absolutely" you mutter with a deadpan look.

you catch his gaze and you both burst lout laughing at the same time, the sound filling the room. wow, have his eyes always been this sparkly? without thinking, you lean in a little closer. he mirrors your movement, and this time you're absolutely sure he eyes your lips. as the laughter fades, the air cackles with tension, with potential. but just when you think the space between you two is about to vanish entirely, the sound of approaching footsteps jolts you.

instinctively you grab kylian by the arm and pull him towards the walk in closet. you've just managed to get both of you inside the small space and close it when you hear the sound of the bedroom door opening.

someone, who you assume is rafael, shuffles around the room while whistling softly to themselves. meanwhile your eyes adjust to the darkness in the closet, and when you realize your back is pressed up against kylian's front, you try to move away. except there's no space to move.

lovely, you think.

the sound of the footsteps get awfully close to the closet and suddenly you feel kylian's fingertips land on your hips. your breath hitches, and you feel him tense up behind you. the smell of his cologne fills your senses, and you're immediately transported to a stuffy club in paris– the heat, the music, the feeling of his hand on your thigh, the way his lips grazed your neck in the backseat of the car. you remember it all. but just as suddenly, kylian snatches his hand away, snapping you out of your reverie.

"sorry" he whispers. "i didn't mean to. i - sorry"

you tense again when you feel something poking your behind. is that...? you get your answer when you feel kylian shift around uncomfortably. this could not get more awkward for you.

a few moments later you hear rafael leaving the room, and you immediately walk out of the closet, flushing furiously.

your mind whirls, searching for something to say that could distract from the very obvious.

"so, about the apology. am i forgiven?" you blurt.

he scratches the back of his neck. "well, you've made it very hard for me–"

"i can tell" you smirk, glancing down at the bulge in his pants.

"– but we're good" he finishes, ignoring your comment. you, however, don't miss the embarrassed look on his face.

you stand there awkwardly for a second. you think about the fact that he's confided in you that he feels lonely, and you get an idea.

"do you want to grab some desert some place else?" the words are out your mouth before you could second guess them. "you know how the spanish love their late dinners. i have a spot i could show you" you put on grin, hoping he sees this as an olive branch.

"oh" his face immediately twists into an apologetic expression. "i can't tonight. i have to get up for an early meeting in the morning. sorry"

"no worries" you say casually, but a small part of you deflates. at least you tried.

"right" he says "well i should probably head home. and good call back there, by the way. would've looked super weird if rafael saw us in his bedroom all by ourselves"

"yeah" you say, tone even. "super, super weird"

you make sure the coast is clear before heading out of the room and making your way downstairs. after you've both said your goodbyes and thanked rafael, you find yourselves at the front door, him waiting for his driver and you for your uber.

"i could drop you off, you know" he offers. his tone is polite, like you're a stranger he's just met and not someone who he's had heated arguments with. it makes you feel weird.

"it's fine" you wave him off with a smile.

when your uber arrives, you turn to him to say goodbye. you hesitate for a second, a part of you hoping he'll change his mind about getting desert or maybe ask again about dropping you home.

but he only says "i'll see you around"

"see you" you say, and you walk over to the car.

at home, late at night, you're sleepless. you think about the almost kiss. the awkwardness in the closet. you toss and turn, but you can't get kylian out of your mind. you replay every word you said to each other, every touch you exchanged.

but that bubble bursts the next morning when you come across a picture on your instagram explore page that makes your blood boil. it's a paparazzi shot of kylian and a scantily clad woman leaving a club late at night. the caption reads, real madrid star kylian mbappe seen leaving club with mystery blonde

the timestamp reveals it's from last night. the same night he refused your kind offer to spend time with him. you feel deceived, disappointment and anger simmering inside you. you can't believe you were starting to like the guy, that you almost opened up to him.

you send the post to his instagram account, typing out a quick message :

hope she got better sex <3

tags: @kyliansonlygf @ynkfreeastheocean @scottishthistle @user6373738 @lucysantos6-blog @tuliptopiasstuff @kennasutopia @cinderellawithashoe @akiracim @kymb-10 @germanapples @loonworld @ajsboys @whateveryouloser @greyishbach

[softfem-dom]

the girl interrupted syndrome masterlist !

featuring MENTAL HOSPITAL x-men AU

" don't they know it's the end of the world? " intro post

the masterlist for the bots of this event! requests are open and every ask is welcome! remember, this is about and for you! so go wild <333

⌢⠀ ★ .ᐟ

LOGAN HOWLETT , the nightshift nurse

[1,] "HERE AGAIN, BUB?" - anxious!user logan takes the evening and night shifts at the ward for the same reason you always sneak past your bedtime, less people to worry about. [2,] WAR STORIES - all illnesses!user you thought the new nurse didn't like kids, broken kids, and that's why he only took the nightshifts. turns out that, now that you can't sleep, he is a pretty okay story teller. [3,] THE TITLE COMES IN HANDY - suicidal!user logan howlett hasn't got the surgeon title just for show, still, when it's your body he has to tear open to put back togheter after you jumped off of a roof he finds himself getting sick. ^this bot was uploaded to spicychat.ai for shadowbanning reasons in character.ai, still it remains completely non-sexual!!!

..

SCOTT SUMMERS , the backyard guard

n o t h i n g h e r e y e t

..

HANK MCCOY , the psychologist

n o t h i n g h e r e y e t

..

REMY LEBEAU , the chef

n o t h i n g h e r e y e t

..

KURT WAGNER , the pastoral consuelor

n o t h i n g h e r e y e t

..

JEAN GREY , the head nurse

n o t h i n g h e r e y e t

..

ORORO MUNROE , the general nurse

n o t h i n g h e r e y e t

..

WADE WILSON , the child entertainer

[1,] TOO COOL FOR THAT - all illnesses!user You're not exactly thrilled when this chatterbox of a guy starts showing up on thursdays and tuesday to do 'bonding activities' with all the patients, so you slip out to the backyard. The problem? he has found you.

..

[op3ra]

hands that fix / eyes that shield

fav actresses: there are so many wrench actresses i like!! i haven't seen footage of her but recently maja johansson is my fav visual inspo for her <33 the perf faceclaim honestly

fav ships: oh u know i'm unironically mentally ill about wrench x rusty. i think she deserves softness in the form of the kindest most stubborn idiot she's ever met. that "older workaholic couple learning to love for the first time in many years" dynamic just gets me. i also love dinah x wrench OF COURSE and my besties are massive brained for coming up with that one <333 volta x wrench and joule x wrench also favs

headcannons: she used to be a steam crane before converting herself to a diesel hydraulic crane. she's self propelled so she's pretty fast and can't race behind an engine in partner races since she's classed as one herself. she's been a dedicated race medic and trainer her entire life, and is highly sought after by professional racers. inbetween racer contracts she works as a standby medic for races. hasn't dated in decades because she prioritizes her career and is thrilled to have found herself a partner who is cool never being her first priority and values independence. repaired and brought joule to life and is incredibly fond of her <3 owns two robocats who live with rusty. constantly feels cold due to a fluke in her conversion. is the only train to have done her own conversion with her own hands. instead of dreaming when asleep she runs maintenance on her code. has misophonia and major depressive disorder. convinced she doesn't know how to be vulnerable or loveable. krupp is her oldest friend and has worked with her many times before they both got hired by electra. big enjoyer of different teas. is a crazy workaholic. has triangular pupils which nobody knows the explanation behind. has seen her fair share of death and suffering as a trackside emergency responder. has an innate need to look put together to other people at all times even when she's struggling. knows how to fight and will fight to protect her loved ones (the components). rough and blunt on the outside. gift giving and acts of service are her love languages. doesn't really have a home because she's traveling with electra so often. there's more but this is a huge wall of text already

opinion: i don't like it when men cover her tbh let androgynous women be women. luuk hartog is the only exception bc he's so damn good at her makeup

[0ddlyc0re]

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.'This is so Sylvia Plath coded!!'‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.

Watching girls romanticise mental illness is so sad because in a way the romanticisation of mental illness was made by men because they want someone vulnerable. This is the stuff that drives women away from treatment, because men find them more "interesting" when they're at their worst. You're not in your 'fleabag era.' You are exhibiting signs of serious mental illness. Don't feel like you need to set yourself alight to be seen. Get help, because everything feels better when you're not trapped in the cycle of self loathing. You've got this girlies! <333 ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁๋࣭ ⭑˙ᵕ˙✿

[celestie0]

ELLIE! Sigh ok I'll try not to make this too long. I've gone back and forth with for quite some time and because of your writing I feel as though I'm slowly becoming a Gojo girl. Now I want to state that there's nothing wrong with that at all! I get the hype. I completely understand but I've never looked at him that way. Suguru has always been it for me when it comes to JJK men. You've ruined me with Kickoff and the retail au story 😭😭😭. What did it do deserve this is?! How could you just come into my life with your wonderful, beautifully written lengthy masterpieces disguised as stories and make me start feeling this way?! I've thought about blocking you (that's a bold face lie BTW. I've never even considered it) to escape these feelings. I had to make you aware because this is completely your fault😮‍💨🥲. Pray for me Ellie...its the least you can do😩

OMG BAKUHOETHOTSKI QUEEN HI <333

“i’m slowly becoming a gojo girl. now i want to state that there’s nothing wrong with that at all!”

pls why did that send me to the fkn moon 😭😭as if the gojo girlies need to seek help or sumn 🤣🤣🤣 and you’re trying to abolish a debilitating stigma PLSSKDJDJFH (valid tho). reminds me of that meme "im not upset w yall bc i know ur mentally ill. which is why im gonna open up a hospital-"

omggg perhaps to convert u to a gojo girlie has been my mischievous plan all along 😏 🙈 just join ussss we r so fun i promise n satoru is our sexy slutty softie man 🫶🏼💕

thank u dear for the compliments i rly dont know how to say how much it means to me 😭💕 to call my silly little intrusive thoughts in the form of proper grammar as MASTEPRIECES is something my brain can simply melt for

omg pls dont block me🧍🏻‍♀️i get sm serotonin sayin ur name out loud from my notifs

okieee i’ll pray for u but i will not stop my evil plan 🙏🏼 ✨

[sexisdisgusting]

ALSO SORRY FOR SO MANY ASKS DJHDFJHDJHD

but do you or any other radblr lesbian girlies have advice for dealing with a "conventionally attractive" body aka an oversexualized body? big ass, big tits, small waist. I hate how i was groomed into believing that coping with sex was okay. i hate how i tried "being more feminine". like i can never get that money back and i can never take back the times ive let those men use me. it sucks. what sucks even more was that ofc it was other women, the handmaidens, who were the main ones to perpetuate that agenda. Because if men were like "yeah its okay to wanna be raped again <3 and getting with men to play out past trauma" then everyone would know their intentions. but no, it was seeing all the women be like "omg this helped me a lot <333 !! and im so much more happy now!!". showing off their age regression stuff. god i hate it. Without those women, there wouldnt have been anything to begin with. I wish more women saw through that BS.

also, to cope with gender dysphoria (like actual gender dysphoria) all ive been doing is just objectifying myself. since my body is very "feminine". its the fucking Porn Artist stereotype. I hate it. I feel like a walking object. I feel like its why I wanted to be a boy, like i wish I had no tits and no ass. because then i wouldnt be sexualized. Buying clothes to "hide" my body doesnt help because then i feel bulky/stuffy and overwhelmed. I hate how i use my body for social validation since because my face is deformed, its all I basically have.

lol im kinda glad though that I struggle with this in a way.... because it made me detrans. Especially seeing as i didnt even feel accepted as trans since I was a transmed. And then seeing these "omg trans healthcare saves lives, tho!!" people go about supporting literal AGPs truly peaked me. When my one ex friend group all trooned out at once, all the men being AGP anime / porn obsessed freaks who previously made fun of my trauma and victim mentality (despite me literally being marginalized) .... now theyre all pretending to be oppressed despite being white men from upper middle class families. Like damn, I AM NOT being in that community then. If that gets accepted? Yet me and my gender dysphoria diagnosis at a young age wasnt? Then nah. Its all nonsense.

i wish lesbian spaces werent taken over bc all this shit be isolating. Like im so sick of sex and porn and all that, i want LOVE goddamnit. Love and friendship. I am so burnt out, dude.

HIIIII MY LOVE, thank you so much for your ask

ugh i can feel first hand how tired you are with this shit in your wording, and i can relate, its really fucking draining

reading about your journey was really interesting, thank you for sharing it with me, im so happy you feel im a safe space for you because thats what i aspire to be <3

ALSO u dont have to apologize for sending a lot of asks, i love it

i feel for you, mootina

its hard to truly love your body and accept it as yours especially when you see pornsick idiots fetishize it

i read recently about the concept of body neutrality, and its where instead of praising, or hating your body, you simply thank it for doing all it does for you, i think perhaps looking into that will help you feel more in tune with yourself, and your body

also, of course this goes without saying, but feminist literature can help you, and also researching the female anatomy

in my struggles with my body, learning more about the capabilities of it helped me a lot with how i felt regarding it, and made it easier to tune out the fuckery of whatever anyone else has to say about it

i love you so much, ill leave the floor open for anyone else who has advice for you

thank you again for entrusting me with this <3

[doomzday-zone]

can u pinpoint inspo? whether heavy or not wt is so weird and vast i kinda just wanna know where this.... how did it get like this..... and or / where did it rlly start ? simple stuff like what character did u make first or really expand on if canon ? r there any characters you just specifically attach to and... may there be a running theme..... raises eyebrow...

also LMAO this is rlly fast but i have like nothin else 2 do :3>

YAYAYYAYAY<3333 oh boy!!! Wt takes insp form A LOT of my interests I couldnt rlly pinpoint one specific thing it's based off of... Sum of my biggest insp that comes 2 mind rn tho r:

Wristcutrers: a love story, every my chemical romance track, German industrial metal in particular but also I'm a HUGE metalhead<3, repo: the genetic opera, speculative biology(my wifee<33), blood. gore gay sex. lol., sonic......... LOL, AND LUK. ten million mot etchings I profess my love for openly<33 I'm v honest abt my interests if anything,,,,,

Where is started ermmmm!!!! Actually wt is a huge mix of. A lot of different aus I've had for manyyyyyy many years. Wt is itsoen thing but kinda doubles as my Canon if u get what I mean. A lot of stuff abt the aus it's made of sadly got deleted w my og blog but u can still find oalylists n shit on Spotify n whatever. Wt started formally I think like a year ago?? Couple years ago???? I was still in my mcrhead era ik this meansnothing to you but u know. Iwbskbdjdb basically I just wanted to make an au that actually had like, a storyline..... Most of my aus r centered around v specific concepts. So I took a lot of those from my other aus n put them into my Canon of sorts n I men..... Here we r lol<33 :3c

Wt was always a shadow and infinite centered thing. I rlly started working on wt the way we see it now in my infinadow era so it was always abt them form the start<33 I'm kess into the ship like I used to be but I still DEEPLY care abt the characters n their relationship to each other even if it's not as romantic as I use dto be abt it u know :) nowadays it's wayyyt more infinite focused(as I've stated bc of the above reasons but also like. I've been hyperfixated on him for going on five years now..... He's my one and only<333) he's the official main character now but shadow is still an integral part of it 2 me,,

Kind of the same answer for the specific character attachment one INFINITEEEEEE INFINITEEEEE he's beenthe center of all my aus since like. Going on what?? Five or so years now??????? It's wild.... Lol. Anyways!! Shadow. Infinite. Wave. Fang, n silver n my special guys.... I have such a specific attachment 2 them it's weird. I don't explain it. I luv them..... They're The characters I think abt when I have new weird shit on my mind... U get it. Lol.

ALSO LOL???? KNAO???????? perhaps there's. Arunning theme....<- guy obsessed w themes n narratives l. Blood guts n gay sex r integral to my creative works, and I mean that.... If it's not bloody at least a little sexual or homierotuc n have graphic violence I did not make it. Skbsjsbdh. I guess....... Idk......... It's kinda hard 2 explain but I put. A lot of myself into my works. It's personal to an extent I also rlly like highly fictionalized stuff caus edit silly to explore real shit in a heightened sense n whatnot but like. Like. Idk. Lol. There's a lot of identity stuff in wt, I have a specific fixation in clones n robots(if u can't tell) n a lot of that comes from me n my weird queer n mental ill ess shit dibdjdh n a plethora of other things u know. I write for myself in an extremely literally sense first n worry abt mass appeal later(or never.. kamo)

[sonder-writes]

I'm fangirling over my own (original) book as I edit it lol

These mentally ill men are my baby girls <333

[toutallyahoe]

hehe it has been a long time and looking back at it it's kinda oddly nostalgic,,

i have also been getting into watching slasher movies because i love my men mentally ill and murders people ;)

anyways pls take care out there!! >_<

oh yeah, its so weird how time goes by fast atm and whoo boi, looking back? my blog got too horny lmao

but oh boi, love that for you! scream is going to be my favourite slasher movie but tbf, i only watched a few slasher movies atm because bitches prefer to watch silly dumb cartoon football bois be idiots

but damn, love me some mentally fucked up men as well (and women too)

and ill take care if you do too! remember to stay safe, healthy and hydrated gremlin <333

[lemonsbakery]

Hey uhm what are your ocs

cracking my knuckles.

CR OCS :333

Strawberry cat cookie/CC (blunt little girl with a terrible memory. needs therapy so badly)

Chocolate cat cookie/010 (mentally ill in so many ways . in a me way but I'm not like so scary)

Vanilla cat cookie (I HATE HER EVIL CAT GHOST LADY)

Cherry cat cookie (the mom of the cat triplets. People keep victimizing her even though she was also apart of the problem)

'Flour' cookie (cocaine. Father of the cat triplets. I hate him)

Dog treat cookie (SILLY SKATER LESBIAN GIRL underaged smoker and also has a crush on strawberry cat cookie in the future but cc is really fucking stupid and cant pick up on dog treat cookies obvious pickup lines)

Linzer cookie (dead military ghost lady, also known as silly lesbian emo girl)

Banana candy cookie (therapist and scientist, also known as lesbian scene girl)

Banana split cookie (eldest child of banana candy and linzer, really liked lofi, died at like um 11 or something)

Berry jam cookie (youngest child of banana candy and linzer, really liked vocaloid, died at like 9 years old)

Spritz cookie (SILLY SO SILLY SO SO SO SO SO SILLY AND COOL AND people keep watering magic down to innocent and sweet magic so much more, candy is silly but not stupid. shes a little stupid but not fucking DUMB) (also she/magic/candy pronouns for spritz thankies)

PISS COOKIE. (joke oc)

Flan cookie (HAUGHTY LOCKSMITH WHO has a little kid issue and also is sort of a roguefort fangirl but he will never admit it to anybody else)

Girl scout cookie (bothers haughty locksmith and keeps getting stuck in unconventional places, for example, inside of traffic cone and a vending machine. Also she knows Everyones home address.)

Pink grass cookie (BASED ON THOSE LIKE. UM. THOSE EGGS THAT HAD THE FLAVORED GRASS IN IT. Shes so mentally ill and um she kind of has some Serious issues with. everything oh god save her shes so fucked the religious trauma is insane)

Moose tracks cookie (47 year old single train conductor that's rivals with two other train stations but also thinks its all fun and games and loves her rivals and also will call you sweetheart, honey, and dearheart)

Microplastic cookie (wip. I am not elaborating.)

OTHER OCS :33

Mio Mirai (Girlboss v-tuber who will manipulate you and act cute while doing it)

Junichi Mirai (Brother of girlboss v-tuber. Makes really good eggs. My friends keep calling him a whore)

Grace Happyfield (Genius fucking 12 year old with cat ears and is also being raised by two maniacs that love her so much and she loves them both too. One is her mom and the other is this girl owned by my friend who taught her how to properly kill men and get away with it by being a cutie pie xx Oh and her moms a lesbian)

Alice Happyfield (GRACIES MOM!! She had her daughter kill her husband and experimented on his body. Sold the leftovers)

Harmony (I dont have a last name for her. shes 12 and had a crush on her friend who was a girl but uhoh her friend who was agirl got assassinated for being openly pansexual!!! uhoh!! shes also friends with Gracie heheohoho)

Egret Flowers (Roblox oc, really silly child that has underlying attachment and self image issues. Also she doesn't have a face)

Lilith (TMC oc, basically shes like Gabriel but instead she targets men specifically by gaining their trust and crushing them)

Alexander Weeks (FNAF oc, he's so transgender and really wants his mom dead . Btw keep in mind that he's a fnaf oc and a minor that's transgender in the 1980s)

Alex (same guy as above but make him an edgy robot that really likes cats)

Zombie cat (Read the name)

Sorrel (Epithet erased oc!! Her epithet is creativity, she basically turns fiction into reality at the expense of her own or others energy. She has no idea how to properly work it shes like 11 OH AND SHE HAS A MOTHER FIGURE THAT ALSO HAS AN EPITHET THATS MUSHROOM THEMED and and also sorrel likes baking)

Cloth (An alien that crash landed on earth. He is completely convinced that he's a human)

Ecole (An alien that crash landed on earth with cloth. She is cloths sister. shes is a famous dancer, and is on every magazine from her home planet. She wants to smack some sense into her brother)

Sew (ANOTHER ALIEN that crash landed on earth. She doesn't think she's a human or an alien, he is just himself. They also really like surfing and skating)

Doll (An old porcelain doll that was abandoned in a garden. It now tends to the plants itself since nobody else will)

MY PErSONA!! (I'm counting this as an oc because my persona has lore

theres more, but ill spare you LMSFAO

[the-fox-and-his-prince]

About me!!!

an intro to myself, for yourself

this pretty much covers what all I'll be posting about, as well as a couple of things that I feel are important to my identity

Check out my sideblogs:

Reblogs- @blog-for-reblogs

Laugh rule- @the-laugh-rule

Starkid fan blog- @high-on-hatchetfield

Thanks!!

<333

Names/Nicknames/Titles/Reference Terms (subject to change):

*Eva- Evandra, Evan, Evangeline, Evy, Ev, Eeeeee (as many e's as you want), E (just one)

*Ruth- Rue, R (always just one)

*Eva Ruth- Eeiru, ER

*Elanor- Ellie, El, Ela, Nora, Lana, E

*Simon- Si

(i am a collector hehehee)

(when in doubt, Eva, Eva Ruth, and E are always fine)

Age (also subject to change):

*freshly adult

(this is not an invitation to hit on me)

Worldview:

*Christian

*"This is the first and great commandment: love the Lord your God, with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. And the second is like it, love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the law and the prophets." - Matthew 22: 37-40

*"Do justice, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God." - Micah 6:8b

*God is Love. His love is unconditional.

*hmu if you ever want someone to be praying for you

*everyone and thing alive is inherently worthy of love and respect

*hate in the name of God is evil, blasphemous, and frankly disgusting. if you use your christianity as an excuse to be cruel (or if you're just cruel in general), please dni.

Gender Identity:

*AFAB

*she/her pronouns

*technically cis

*gnc as cuss

(Cuss the binary to hell <3)

Sexual Identity:

*not into the sexy times (never had or wanted one, seems unfun)

*I like men too much (romantically)

*gotta stop falling for my besties lollllll </3

*not a big fan of labels or boxes

Fandoms! (alphabetically):

*Avatar: the Last Airbender

*Chaos Walking (books)

*D.C. Comics

*Gravity Falls

*Hadestown

*Marvel Comics (this is different from the MCU, btw)

*Middle-Earth

*Studio Ghibli

*Stranger Things

*Taylor Swift

Recent obsessions (to be updated with some sort of regularity):

*Batman and his batlings

*Everything is Fine

*Lord of the Rings

*Percy Jackson and The Olympians

*Newsies (specifically Ben Fankhauser)

*Starkid (specifically the Hatchetverse)

Other:

*theatre kid

*artist

*mentally ill

*2 siblings- R and @kakitysax !!

*dnd enthusiast lol

*i have a bit about being married to kermit the frog, and you're gonna have to get used to it