#memories fade into emptiness. ( I N K Y )

[yumiyue07]

Through Fire and Blood

Part 22 - The last part

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19 | Part 20 | Part 21

｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆｡･:*:･ﾟ’★ POV: K-idol x reader

H/N = His name Y/N = Your name

｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆｡･:*:･ﾟ’★,｡･:*:･ﾟ’☆｡･:*:･ﾟ’★

Epilogue - A few weeks later.

"My love, are you ready?" H/N called from the living room, his voice carrying that familiar tone of excitement that sent butterflies fluttering in your chest.

"Yes, I'm just grabbing my handbag," you replied, your heart racing with anticipation as you gave yourself one last look in the mirror. When you stepped out of the bedroom, you were greeted with a gaze so intense it made your pulse quicken. H/N’s eyes swept over you, lingering with admiration. You could see the glimmer of appreciation that made your effort to dress up completely worth it.

The cocktail dress you had chosen, in his favorite color, hugged your figure perfectly. You had taken extra care with your hair and makeup, wanting everything to be flawless for this long-overdue evening. The memory of the last few weeks flashed briefly in your mind—the chaos, the fear, the relief of being safe again. Tonight, though, was about celebrating your love.

But as stunning as you felt, nothing could compare to how H/N looked standing there in a perfectly tailored suit, his usual rugged charm replaced with an almost regal elegance. His chiseled features were highlighted by the soft lighting of the living room, and the smile he gave you was enough to make your knees weak.

He extended his hand toward you, and you slipped your fingers into his, marveling at how perfectly they fit. "May I?" he asked, his voice soft, but his eyes gleaming with affection. "You look… absolutely breathtaking."

A blush crept up your cheeks as you let him take your hand, his touch as electric as always. "Thank you, my darling. You look unbelievably handsome yourself," you replied, feeling a little breathless under his gaze.

With his hand firmly in yours, you walked together to the car, which was already waiting outside. As you settled into the passenger seat, H/N placed his hand over yours, squeezing gently. The tension of the past weeks had finally melted away, leaving only the promise of this evening—a night just for the two of you.

When you arrived at the restaurant, you gasped in awe. The terrace was bathed in the warm, magical glow of hundreds of fairy lights, twinkling like stars against the evening sky. The entire area was empty, save for a single, elegantly set table near the railing. It was breathtakingly beautiful, a scene straight out of a dream.

You turned to H/N, your eyes wide with astonishment. "You did all this?" you asked softly, emotion swelling in your chest.

He smiled, bringing your hand to his lips and pressing a tender kiss against your knuckles. "Only the best for you, my love. Tonight, it's all about us. No interruptions. Just you and me."

The love in his voice and the gesture of renting out the entire restaurant just for the two of you left you speechless. It was as though the rest of the world had faded away, and only the two of you existed in this bubble of light and love.

As you walked toward the table, H/N kept you close to his side, his warmth enveloping you as the fairy lights danced around your forms. "I wanted to make up for all the time we lost," he whispered, guiding you to your seat.

Upon arrival, the staff greeted you with warm smiles, guiding you to a beautifully set table. The soft lighting, elegant decor, and the gentle hum of background music created the perfect ambiance for your special night.

As you sat down, H/N reached across the table, taking your hand in his. "I’ve been looking forward to this for so long," he said, his voice soft and sincere.

"Me too," you replied, your heart swelling with love. "It’s perfect. Thank you for doing all this."

H/N's thumb brushed tenderly over the back of your hand, his eyes soft as they gazed into yours. "I don’t say it enough, but you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. After everything we’ve been through... I realize I don’t ever want to take you for granted. You’re my everything."

Your heart fluttered at his words, the depth of his love filling the space between you. "I feel the same way," you whispered, your voice thick with emotion. "You’ve given me so much—your love, your protection, your strength. I’m so lucky to have you."

H/N smiled, his expression full of warmth. "We’ve got each other, and that’s all that matters."

The waiter appeared just then with a bottle of champagne, pouring you each a glass before quietly retreating. H/N lifted his glass, his gaze locking with yours. "To us," he said, his voice rich with meaning. "To love, to everything that lies ahead."

"To us," you echoed, clinking your glass against his, a soft ting marking the moment. You took a sip, the bubbles dancing on your tongue, and as you placed your glass down, H/N leaned in closer, his voice dropping to a hushed, intimate tone.

"Tonight," he whispered, "I want to show you just how much I love you."

As the evening drew to a close, you found yourselves not wanting the night to end. The connection between you had only deepened through the trials you had faced together, and this dinner was a beautiful celebration of your love and resilience.

H/N stood up, holding out his hand once more. "May I have this dance?" he asked, his eyes twinkling with affection.

You nodded, smiling as you took his hand as he led you to the center of the room.

The two of you swayed slowly, the world outside dissolving as H/N held you closer, his arms wrapped securely around you. The soft music and the gentle glow of lights cast a dreamy spell, and every movement felt timeless, like you were caught in a beautiful moment that neither of you wanted to end.

As the music played on, H/N leaned down, his forehead resting gently against yours. "You’re my heart, my soul, my everything," he whispered, his breath warm against your skin.

You felt a rush of emotions, your heart swelling with love for him. "You mean everything to me," you whispered back, looking up into his eyes. "I don’t know how I got so lucky, but I’m so grateful I have you in my life."

He smiled, his eyes filled with a love that seemed endless. Slowly, he brought his lips to yours, the kiss tender and full of the promises you had made to each other. It wasn’t just a kiss—it was a vow, a reminder of everything you had overcome together and everything you still had to look forward to.

When you finally pulled away, his hands cupped your face, his thumb brushing over your cheek as he whispered, "This... right here, this moment with you, is everything I’ve ever wanted. I love you, more than you’ll ever know."

You nodded, feeling the same. "And it’s only the beginning. I love you."

With that, you rested your head against his chest, letting the peaceful rhythm of his heartbeat guide you through the night. Nothing else mattered, just the two of you, dancing under the stars of a perfect evening.

Sometime after midnight, you found yourselves back at your doorstep. The cool night air sent a shiver down your spine, but H/N's warmth was a comforting presence beside you. He surprised you with a playful sweep into his arms. H/N opened the door and unexpectedly picked you up in his arms. "Oops, what's going on now?" you giggled.

"I'm your strong hero!" he grinned, a playful sparkle in his eyes.

H/N’s playful grin made your heart skip a beat as he carried you effortlessly through the door. The familiar scent of home wrapped around you, but tonight it felt different—more intimate, filled with an unspoken promise. You giggled, tightening your arms around his neck, enjoying the way his strength made you feel so safe.

"Strong hero, huh?" you teased, brushing a lock of hair from his forehead. "And where’s my cape?"

He chuckled softly, his chest rumbling under your cheek. "I think I left it at the dry cleaners," he quipped, making you laugh even more.

As you reached the bedroom, his steps slowed, the atmosphere shifting from playful to something more tender. His eyes never left yours as he gently set you down on the edge of the bed, his hands lingering on your waist. The affection in his gaze made your breath hitch—this was more than just a playful gesture. It was a reminder of the love and trust that had grown between you, stronger than ever.

For a moment, neither of you moved, simply soaking in the warmth of each other’s presence, the air heavy with anticipation.

"Are you... tired?" he asked, almost embarrassed, a hint of uncertainty in his voice.

H/N’s question hung in the air, laced with vulnerability, and for a brief second, you could see the mix of longing and hesitation in his eyes. He was trying to be careful, mindful of his injury, yet you both knew that this moment had been building for weeks. Your heart pounded in your chest as you gazed at him, the desire between you palpable.

Without a word, you reached up, cupping his face gently in your hands. Your fingers brushed against his skin, warm and familiar, and his breath hitched as your eyes met. No words were needed. The connection between you, deepened by everything you had been through together, spoke louder than any reassurance could.

Your lips met his in a slow, smoldering kiss, pouring into it all the emotions you had been holding back—the love, the passion, the gratitude for his safe return. His response was immediate, his arms tightening around you as he kissed you back with an intensity that matched your own.

It was as if the world outside ceased to exist, and in that moment, all that mattered was the two of you. H/N’s hands trailed down your back, pulling you closer as the kiss deepened, filled with the hunger and desire that had been simmering between you since that fateful night.

H/N gently lowered you onto the bed, his lips never leaving yours. His kisses were raining down on you like a shower of stars, trailing down your neck and back to your lips.

Each kiss was a promise, each touch igniting the fire that had been quietly burning between you. The intimacy of the moment was heightened by the slow, deliberate way you undressed one another—no rush, no urgency, just a shared reverence for the time you were finally able to share.

His eyes, now dark with a mixture of love and desire, locked onto yours as he hovered above you. The connection between you was palpable, an unspoken understanding that went beyond words. In that moment, everything else faded away, leaving only the two of you, completely vulnerable and open to one another.

"I love you, Y/N," he murmured, his voice husky with emotion, each word heavy with meaning. "You are my life."

Your heart swelled at his words, and you reached up, your thumb softly stroking his cheek, grounding yourself in the reality of his presence. "And you're mine, H/N," you whispered, your voice tender but filled with conviction. "I love you more than words can say."

In the stillness of the night, you breathed, "Make love to me, H/N."

The intensity between you grew with every kiss, each touch sending ripples of pleasure through your body. His lips moved over yours with a tenderness that belied the fire building between you. Each time he whispered your name, it was like a prayer, full of reverence and longing. In response, soft moans escaped your lips, matching the rhythm of your hearts as your bodies moved together in perfect, effortless harmony.

The air was filled with love and passion, the sound of your names mingling in the night as they echoed in the intimate space you shared. Every kiss, every breath, every whispered word of affection heightened the connection between you. The room became a sanctuary where nothing else existed—only the deep, unbreakable bond you shared.

You made love with a profound tenderness that reflected the journey you had been through together, each touch reaffirming the love that had only grown stronger through the trials you had faced. As the night stretched on, your connection deepened with every moment, every caress. You held each other close, hearts and souls intertwined, knowing that this love was something extraordinary, something that would endure through any challenge life might bring.

In the stillness of the night, the world outside seemed to disappear as you lay entwined in H/N’s arms, feeling the warmth and safety of his embrace. Your bodies fit perfectly together, hearts syncing in a rhythm that only the two of you shared.

The quiet intimacy of the moment enveloped you both, the silence speaking volumes about the depth of your connection. You knew that nothing would ever tear you apart again. As your eyelids grew heavy, you whispered softly into the night, "Forever."

H/N’s arms tightened around you, his breath brushing against your hair as he murmured in return, "Forever." There was a quiet certainty in his voice, a promise that transcended words. The future, no matter how unpredictable, didn’t matter because you both knew—through every high and low, you would always have each other.

And as sleep claimed you, the love you shared was the only thing that lingered in the peaceful darkness, unbreakable and everlasting.

The End.

♡

And that's a wrap! 🎉

Thank you all for being on this journey with me!

I hope you enjoyed reading the story as much as I loved sharing it with you. ♡

Love, YumiYue 🌙

(⌒▽⌒)♡

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Tag list ♡ @catlove83 @burningemberz

[dathomirdumpsterfire]

~Chapter 3: Haunted, Hunted, & Other Fun Hobbies~

[Ao3 link below the read more, at the end.]

It begins the day after Maul makes his return to Dathomir. 

The sith is elbows deep in datapads trying to gain background knowledge on the Crimson Dawn's next venture: an escargot farm, of all things, for a particular breed of shellfish. One that acts as a nearly universal aphrodisiac when eaten. Vos had declared the market for it 'an untapped niche' with projected gains in the 'I could buy a moon every other year' category. 

He already has a planet. Dathomir is more or less his, but Maul thinks he might like a moon or two. Besides, one never knew when they might need a spare astral body in his line of work. Perhaps for trade, perhaps for crashing into things. He is flexible. 

One minute he is reviewing zoology documents made by a mon calamari, and then gently, like a cloud over the sun, he is being watched.

His spine straightens and the sith pulls his sense of self tight to his skin, guarding himself while attempting to observe the observer. The presence slips through his fingers, but he too slips through theirs. They go round and round like two predators in the night, stalking each other through the flow of the force. 

Eventually the feeling fades, and Maul is left alone in his office space, perturbed. He waits an hour or more, patient and wary, but the sensation of being sought does not return.

He exhales heavily through his nose and returns to reading about aquarium keeping, stopping only to make snacks, refresh the tea pot, and stretch his back.

Dathomir's red star sinks below the horizon. Domir takes with it the light that had been coming in from the floor-to-ceiling windows, leaving the spectacular view of the sunrise canyon in deepening purple hues. Maul takes this as his cue to end the day.

The sith stalks out of his simplistic office, and heads to the end of the hallway. The decor transitions from plasteel to roughly carved redstone at the doorway, from the soft orange glow of sodium-vapor bulbs to flickering oil lanterns and magelight. He had appointed the bedroom den at the end of the hall with far more dathomirian aesthetics than the modern office space. 

Some furniture he had been able to scavenge from the temple, mostly of carved stone, though there were a few precious wooden pieces left unburnt by the droid army among them. A small table, a few mismatched chairs, and a hefty trunk. The rest of his furnishings Maul had collected from offworld. 

The result is… functional. Quiet and dark. The bed space is large and comfortable, partially carved back into the wall for extra protection. Nowhere is too open. Everything he wishes to be reminded of has a place to sit, somewhere he can see. 

Dim candles light all the cracks and corners without hurting his eyes. There are books and scrolls to read, an orb recovered from his mother’s temple, projects to tinker with in idle moments. It is… good, he thinks. Though he might reorganize his memory items again. Later. 

For now, he plans to undress, bathe, and-

w

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               o

                      r                                                      ?

                                     y       o       u           ?

Maul whips around, expecting a physical presence, but there is no one and nothing there. He coats himself in a basic spell of obfuscating mist and draws his force presence close to his hearts, under his skin. 

The observer tries to catch him up with a searching pattern that feels like smokey claws and gossamer hairs, winding ribbons and closing jaws. Threads, deceptive in their affectionate creeping. 

"One?" he rasps in the empty hallway, "No… more. Several." 

There are so many aspects of force trying to locate him that surely it must be a ritual, fueled by multiple people. Four or five, at bare minimum. He would guess it was his former master's doing, but surely Sidious would not need to look for him so much as come for him if he decided to spare the effort. 

So who? Who?

But to look with that part of him which can See is to open himself, and Maul is not certain of the wisdom in letting this coven of force users near him just for the chance to find them.

Sweat beads on his scalp, dripping down and sliding off his chin. The effort to remain untouchable, hidden from these hunters, is intensely taxing, but the force vibrates in warning whenever he starts to slip.

Then, suddenly, he is alone again. 

He waits, just as before, shoulders high and breathing hard as he remains watchful. The air remains still, lacking that dark innervation. Maul falls back against the wall, and presses the heel of a palm to his forehead. The effort has earned him a headache and shaking fingers. 

The sith returns to moving down the hall, but changes destination. His den, while comfortable, is not the most secure location available here. That title goes to his mother's sanctum, riddled with runes and steeped in ichor fueled protections. He has not yet deciphered the nature of even half of the witch-made wards from the books and murals that remain of her teachings. 

Maul slips into the sanctum, touching his chest where once her spirit had anchored itself. 

"Mother," he begins, searching for an acceptable explanation for intruding. "I seek… shelter, in your sanctum. I am hunted by a power unknown, and the force warns me to avoid its touch." 

That is an understatement. The force buzzes with indistinct warning, a vibrating drone so deep and ubiquitous it feels physical. Bumblebees underwater, crawling anxiety like marching ants. 

No reply comes. He counts that as permission.

The sith goes to sit on the stone floor at the center of grooved patterns and runes. He will meditate now and gather his strength, assuming that eventually-

It returns! So quickly the threads descend again.

Vitriolic green light bursts to his left, then forward, then above him. Sharp eyes survey the room as sections of sigils light and dim along the walls, like fireworks. The grooves in the floor begin to fill with-

"Ichor," he murmurs, watching the luminous waters fill in the circling patterns. He cannot identify the source of where it flows from. 

This… is not magick Maul has witnessed before. Savage had, reluctantly, described his own rituals, and the healing the Nightmother had done for Maul after Lotho Minor, but this is… different. Carved into Dathomir’s living stone, commanding the planet’s power even in the absence of a witch to direct it. It is wonderous.

The feeling of being looked for slides away from him with so much more ease, and he sighs in relief.

Maul ends up sleeping there, curled in on himself on the stone floor. Every few hours the cloying tendrils return again, and he wakes to watch the wards and push away the hooks that stretch for him.

It is only after a week of being chased back to his mother's room, day and night, that he realizes he is trapped on Dathomir until the hunt is ended. Until he ends it. To do that, he will have to learn to hide all on his own. Without becoming an unhinged, sleepless mess incapable of hunting these new enemies.

Maul faces this reality with easy acceptance. He has survived harsher challenges before, and will again. Mustafar, Lotho Minor, Hypori- the dark sustained him every time. 

This will end no differently.

[ectoplasmic-entity]

Can I request a platonic Dark Danny with a sibling!GN reader. After Danny became dark Danny and left, (y/n) was devastated of the disappearance of her last family member. Years later when (y/n) finally reunites with Dan again, Dan expects them to be scared of him and hate him but instead he’s taken aback when they hug him and tell him how much they missed him.

Back from the dead yall! Blame the somewhat perfectionist writer in me (¬_¬")

At the very least, I wanted to post by / before the new year. This is my longest one yet, anon, I do hope you like it.

Genre: Gen + Emotional Hurt/Comfort

Rating: K+

Content Warnings: Implied/referenced character death

Words: 5.1k+

Gone.

Just like that.

It hits you harder than you expect. You may not have been blood siblings, the bond you share is just as intimate and powerful. For all intents and purposes, you’re as much of a sibling to Danny as Jazz was an older sister to him.

The events that transpired are still muddy in your mind. In one moment, it seems like you have your life together. In the next, it’s all gone in one fell swoop in a bright orange haze.

Unbearable heat forms in your body. Your breath shudders in terror as it violently shoots through you. You stiffen, awaiting a fiery death that never comes.

Your tired eyes crack open to survey the dark room. Still and quiet with the cool night soothing it. It stands exactly as you left it, and expect it will be for the rest of your life. You squeeze your eyes shut in disgust.

How dare such thoughts worm into your mind.

You hardly notice that you don’t fight the notion. Your gut clenches painfully. You cast your gaze downwards, avoiding the facts standing there, staring at you right in the face.

A thin layer of dust settles in the empty room. Still and undisturbed. As if a lifetime has passed in the blink of an eye, even though Danny left about a month ago. His presence has already begun to wane in his own home.

Quiet whimpers shake your body, you wrap your arms around you tightly. Clinging onto the remnants of your makeshift family. Your body rocks back and forth as you hug yourself tighter, like sand through fingers, they fade from your memory. A fog fills your head, it’s only the reminder that you’re standing in Danny’s room that you cling onto your family.

A single teardrop jolts you out of your exhausted mind. You blankly stare as more and more tears drop, rhythmically splattering on your skin. You weren’t sure you could cry anymore. You couldn’t even bring yourself to cry when Danny left.

A quiet, eerie creak pulls you out your stupor once more. A darkness enshrouds you, your eyes throb in dull pain, forcing you to keep them closed shut.

Another creak.

You survey the room again through bleary eyes. You slowly, mechanically move in one direction, your soles plant firmly on the floor. Rigid muscles that refuse to loosen keep your limbs locked in place. Your shoes shuffle loudly on the wooden floorboards. The darkness follows you wherever you go, just on the edge of your vision.

You aren’t sure why you’re doing this. You find yourself facing the empty doorway, directly across from the bed frame behind you. You breathe deeply, the fresh air clears your throat, and it floods with emotion.

Half shuttered eyes linger on the door, as if you expect Danny to walk through any moment.

Your hand becomes a fist, it quivers with suppressed emotion. You take a few steps back, as far from the door as possible. You continue to stare at it in spite of the reality.

The back of your legs meets the angled, metal edges of the bed frame. Pain tingles up your legs. It's only then you realize the strength fades from your body. You remain upright because you know you'll have an uncomfortable landing on the metal frame behind you if you give in.

Tense quiet looms over you. Your body tilts as you choke down more whimpers, a grin split across your face. Your eyes sting with fresh tears, your breath quickens. Melancholic nostalgia tugs at you, a heaviness presses down on your chest.

A bang startles you, it echoes through the empty house. You remain silent. Your eyes go from the door and peer around in search of the source. Your heart hammers in your chest, yet you remain as still as possible. You don’t want to move; your body weighs down heavily with emotion and exhaustion.

The footsteps sound throughout the home. Fast and light. You shakily breathe in a mix of relief and indignation.

A vaguely familiar voice calls out your name. You perk up with mild interest. It’s so far away and, at the same time, reaches your ears in no time at all. You wonder if whoever it is knows where you are. Not surprising considering how you’ve been behaving in the last month.

You hear your name again, louder and clearer than you can recall.

You hear the footsteps right outside the door, quick but heavy. As if whoever it was had run a marathon. You scrunch up your nose in irritation, you aren’t a small child anymore.

Goosebumps tingle down your body as the presence of another individual enters the empty bedroom, though the space seems to stretch itself out. You barely acknowledge your visitor, your mind still in another plane of consciousness. Unwilling to pull yourself back to reality and face it again.

Down below, on the dusty, creaky floorboards, a pair of white sneakers cross into the threshold of your vision. You jolt back in surprise when a pair of hands grab your shoulders, you instinctively back away. Cutting pain shoots up your legs when they thump against the wiry bed frame that rattles eerily. You shiver in discomfort as you slowly tilt your head up.

Hazel eyes, dark and smooth skin, and thick, curly brown hair that seamlessly blend with orange and yellow. Valerie Gray stares down at you, brows crinkle and lips tight with worry. She breathes heavily, clearly, she was seeking you out. 

The two of you stare at each other for several seconds, her hands never loosen their grip. Like you’ll disappear again if she does.

Then, finally, Valerie breaks the silence first. “I knew I’d find you here.”

Spoken all in one breath. You wonder if she ran across town looking for you.

“Yeah, well…” you mumble out, sounding not all that caring.

Valerie lightens her grip, but not so much so that you can slip away. She takes a step back with her arms straight and firm.

“You know coming here isn’t gonna bring him back, right?” She asks lightly.

You shrug your shoulders. They’re heavy, even with or without Valerie’s hands there. Your muscles must be sore, or perhaps a phantom weight of other things that can’t quite physically touch you. You inhale shakily, a familiar motion wells up inside you, uncomfortably twisting and pulling at you. You involuntarily inhale again, this time through your nose. It’s loud and rough, like a sniffle.

“Come on, moping around’s not gonna help you.” Valerie says with one of her brows rising.

You stay silent, your head dips back down to avoid eye contact. Too emotionally worn to argue with her, to expend your energy on anything else other than grief. Your body sways forwards as Valerie tugs on your shoulders, pulling you towards her. Your feet automatically shuffle along the floorboards.

You slowly trudge out of the bedroom, head hardly tilting to look around one last time. Empty, an odd sense of serenity that settles where memories used to be. A shadow seeps on to the edge of your vision, as if blotting out any remnant of this house. You try not to think about it, but you fear forgetting them if you leave. That’s why you keep coming back here, no matter how much it hurts.

Fresh, cool evening air blows across your skin and through your hair as you finally step outside. You violently shiver, even though it isn’t that cold, as it’s only mid-spring. Your eyes squeeze themselves shut again, your face tight with emotion. You and Valerie go down the stone steps, onto the street. You wobble slightly, you might as well be stepping into the void and falling.

Falling and falling.

---

You blearily open your eyes. Dull light streaks through the makeshift shutters, cutting through the darkness. Same as always. You have limited time until it fades again, in spite of what time of day it may be. Not that you can tell anymore, it’s been so long. It was necessary in order to survive a somewhat barren world.

You heft yourself up to your feet. Your body is inexplicably heavy, even with how thin you are. Your chest itches with curiosity at why that could be. In a moment of clarity, you get the sense that someone is missing. Like they should be here, right next to you.

You don’t have anyone. Haven’t for many years at this point. Your family all but gone, and friends who come and go faster than the supplies you have on hand. Yet, there is still that inkling of someone missing.

Breath shuddering dryly, you shake the thoughts away. The focus needs to be here and now. Namely, scrounging for supplies. You are only a single person and somehow the supplies get used up quickly. You sigh heavily, peering at the outside world in between the shutters, you’d honestly prefer not go back out there. The world out there is not the same world in your head.

Still… you’d rather feel comfortable when the end does inevitably come, as selfish as it sounds.

You make your way towards the only entrance of your shelter, retreading the same path you always walk. A neat, narrow path with surrounding junk that stack up against the walls in an orderly fashion. A path so dusty and beaten down you can see the indents of your shoes permanently etching into the floor.

After carefully weaving your way through the mess, ever so mindful to not disturb the dangerously wobbling piles, you reach the door. You don’t bother with your hands, instead using your shoulder to push it open. Better hurting your shoulder than losing a hand. With some effort, the door slowly and loudly squeaks open. The dull light glares directly at you, right into your shelter, brightly lighting it up.

You stumble forward when the door swings open, tripping over your own feet. Your hands splay out to keep yourself from falling, they plant themselves firmly on the ground. They make an indent into the dirt underneath, soft and dry. Your arms quiver from the force of the impact, but you’re proud that you didn’t accidentally hurt yourself.

Inhaling deeply, you scrunch up your nose at the dryness. It’s thick and suffocating, it makes your throat scratchy and taste like chalk. Forcefully coughing to ease the disgusting sensation, you cover your face and slowly stand upright.

You start walking, your legs carry you in spite of the harsh landscape. Everything may have been reduced to rubble, you still mostly remember where everything once was.

Your wandering takes you to a wide, deserted road. Crumbling remains of buildings lie on all sides. Few cars lay in abandon, twisting heaps of metal. They are few and far in between, cars became a rare commodity at this point in time.

You head to the side of the street. Amongst the ruins, few buildings remain upright. They’re technically classed ‘unsafe’ since they’re in danger of collapsing. It’s not like the fallen debris was any better either, environmental hazards and whatnot. A cracking, grimy sign hangs above a storefront that was only in partial collapse. A hardware store, you smile slightly at the sense of irony.

Broken windows in the front with cracking foundations, the fractures streak around the stone like a spider’s web. Twisting and spiralling to consume the space it claims.

Approaching the doors, you hesitate before you enter. Past the doors, back into the darkness again.

The hardware store is in an even worse state than your little shelter ever could be. Shattered glass crunches under your shoes, bits and pieces of tools and equipment rattle about as you try to navigate your way through the mess. It’s tightly cluttered and, dare you think it, claustrophobia inducing. The further you move into the shop, the more faint the outside lights become, the massive wave of junk swallowing it up.

Nothing of note gets your attention. Far too messy, you doubt you’ll find anything of use before the daylight fades. Anything that would’ve been useful is in discernible pieces scattered throughout the shop. You kick your feet at the piles of scrap, dust flies up into the air in a grey cloud. Metal clatters loudly, clashing with each other and onto the floor.

The shop is a complete dud. Looting and ransacking beyond your comprehension. You should’ve expected it; desperate times call for desperate measures.

At first, you turn towards the front with a falter in your step. You don’t want this to be all for nothing, have that crushing feeling weigh down on you. Your jaw becomes stiff and you set your shoulders. You lean backward with a look-up at the cracked ceiling, the ground level is only the hardware shop itself, the upper levels are either living quarters or offices. Chances are that the looters didn’t bother wasting time and energy exploring the upside.

You trudge through the remains, the silence disrupted by the occasional clinking of broken bits and pieces. It doesn’t matter how careful you are, there’s always something crunching underfoot. It doesn’t help that you’re farther away from the entrance, it’s much darker in the back, to the point of obscurity. The most you can see are silhouettes.

In the back of the store, there isn’t much to look at. Twisting spires and mangled heaps that were once the shelves are thrown about, spiny pieces of metal glitter dangerously in the faint light. One wrong move and you’re done for. The walls are oddly clean and intact. The looters must’ve really thought there was nothing of value beyond this point.

What really gets your attention is the singular door all in its lonesome in the corner. Dark grey and made of steel, it’s windowless with the only indicator is the sign above it. A long dead battery powered sign with the symbol of a staircase plastered on it. There is nothing else of note to it, you find it odd.

You approach it anyway. Who knows? You might find something after all.

The door handle isn’t particularly complex. Just twist and turn, it pops open. Your hands sting with effort from the metallic rim of the awkwardly placed handle. You hear something creak and crank loudly from the other side, the steel door shivers in its place. You are forced to step back as the extremity of the door flings itself open. 

A rush of cool but musty air blows through you. The other side reveals… a staircase. A metallic pretzel winding in one direction. All the way up to the roof, encasing itself in complete pitch black with walls that close in a narrow path.

Once you step past the steel door, a groaning clang makes you jump with a foreboding sensation that you are stuck. Your heart accelerates and you hold your breath. The door’s only handle is on the outside, the inside is nothing but gears and cables that operate it. 

The only way out is up, it’s not like you have a choice.

Even with the mounting tension that you could very well be stuck in here forever, you attempt to keep yourself steady that you might find something at the top. It’s… getting there that’s the hard part.

You let yourself fall back against the door. You breathe heavily, as if you’re fuelling the mental energy to do it. Your heart thumps against your chest, pulsing blood through you. Numbing goosebumps crawl down your body. 

With trepidation, you place one foot on the first step. A ringing rattle echoes through the darkness. The structure shivers ominously, but remains firm. Exhaling softly with cautious relief, you bring your other foot forward. Both of your hands clutch the railing to keep yourself upright. The metal vibrates intensely under you, your legs bend in response. You crumple slightly, weak all of a sudden.

Shakily breathing, you hang off of one of the railings, your body slumps against the high-rise guardrails. Your hand stubbornly curls around the cylindrical girth of the railing. Straining the muscles in your arms with effort, you slowly pull yourself up. You grip the rails more tightly to stay standing. Beneath you, your knees quiver and nearly buckle with the phantom sensation of the floor becoming soft.

One step at a time. That’s all it takes, one after the other. The staircase still rattles dangerously, however, you keep your cool. The ground below slowly vanishes the higher you go up. You never did take into account how tall the building actually is.

You know for sure the stairs will take you straight to the roof. You don’t know when you’ll get there, it’s perpetually pitch-black no matter how high up you are. Step after step, you try not to think about it, otherwise you’ll lose your focus. You waver slightly, the black swallows up everything around it, you have just the railing to guide you.

Every step prompts you to take a breath. Breathe. In and out.

---

You reach the very top with little fanfare. It may be dark, you have that inkling deep in your gut, you just know. Your legs are tense with anticipation and numb from the impromptu exercise session the stairs give you. Your chest moves in rapid succession with how fast you’re panting.

Reaching out in front of you, a smooth, steel surface greets the palm of your hand. Your hand trails along the surface, tiny grains of dry paint painlessly scrape your skin. It’s soothing in a way.

Your hand finds the doorknob, grasping around it like it’s a lifeline. You flex your fingers to be certain it’s actually there. The knob twists around, you hear a squeak. 

You exhale in relief with a small, wry smile. Your chest becomes taut with apprehension. You feel silly for accomplishing something incredibly basic. You sigh and push the door open, it groans loudly from years of disuse. The familiar gust of a chalky tasting dryness blows directly into your face.

After a bout of harsh coughing, you focus on the view before you. Flat and open, still empty as ever. The receding rays of light indicate to you, it’s not going to last for much longer. It’s haunting, a dead and grey city with its last remnants of life sucking from it. The rays reflecting off of the windows are little sparks of life left, they too fade, the strings too weak to hold it.

Then, in the corner of your eye, you swear you see something move. Just a shadow, maybe, but in this world, nothing is what it seems. Your breath hitches in your throat. Your heart accelerates, you move not even an inch.

Several minutes pass without incident. You peer from the corner of your eye again; a shadowy blur is still on the edge of your vision. It hasn’t moved at all.

You glance around, shadows cast by the walls and the tall ventilation shafts do provide cover. There are wide stretches of complete exposure, however. You’d have to quickly dart between them. It’s not much, but as long as you lie low, you won’t be seen.

In fleeting, a thought passes through your mind. You stiffen with realization. Shuffling to the nearest wall, you press yourself against it. Your body still turns in the direction where you saw the shadowy blur moving. You don’t know if it’s human or a ghost. The thought has your hands turn into fists and press into the brick wall.

No use running away now. You might as well find out. Edging as close as you can to the corner of the wall, you lean just far enough to get a quick glimpse. Right there, on the very edge, you spot a humanoid silhouette. You sense a faint energy around it.

An ice-cold blanket covers your body. An overwhelming sensation weighs down on you, your head inexplicably aches with emotion. You breathe deeply to steady yourself, careful to do so quietly so that the ghost doesn’t hear you. For now, it seems like the ghost isn’t even aware you’re nearby.

A few minutes and nothing. Instead, you think you hear soft sounds. A sob-like sound that chokes back, as though they’re holding back tears. You bite your lip with a flicker of uncertainty. It’s not every day you come across a ghost in such an emotional state.

Curiosity blooms in your chest, nagging at you the longer you stand there. It… couldn’t hurt to check out this ghost. They might not even be hostile.

You edge your way towards the corner of the wall. Your body slides along the rugged brick surface, the lumps and sharp edges dig into you. The discomfort travels up to your throat, sickly fulfilling, and you feel you can’t breathe. The wariness crawls down your body like a cobweb being spun around you, a disgusting, sticky sensation settles onto your exposed skin. A sense of coldness makes itself known, your skin clammy. You anxiously flex your fingers and rub your hands together. 

Why do you feel so… afraid? Afraid of what you might find?

First, you inch yourself around the corner, if only to get a visual. The silhouette is still there, still as a statue. Viciously quashing down any doubts that attempt to halt you in your tracks, you hold your breath as you slowly put one-foot forwards. Your other foot follows, step after step, in a monotonous rhythm.

Stepping out of the shadow of the wall, you feel very naked. You can’t stop yourself now, your legs move on auto. Quiet footsteps fill the stillness. The silhouette grows in size the closer you get. You get the impression they’re actually taller than you initially think. The oddly familiar black and white form crouches over, a long, shrouding cape wraps around the figure.

Their face is hidden by their hands. Snowy white hair flows like a flame from their head, snapping and crackling loudly with whatever this ghost was feeling. Oddly specific, but you do know this particular shade of white.

A thought worms into your mind. It’s a slim possibility, though you can’t help it. That same feeling of someone missing in your life. 

Rattling metal shatters the silence. A pile of scrap scatters around the cement, you never even saw it was there. You jump back; a gasp catches in your throat. Your body tenses and vibrating courses through you, an unpleasant metallic taste floods your throat. Your limbs violently quiver, some part of you screams at you to turn and run. Your heart vigorously pounds your chest, sickly hot rushes through you as an overload of blood pumps through your body.

Just a few feet away, the figure finally perks up for the first time. Slowly standing up while the hands remove themselves, you find yourself staring at a pair of piercing red eyes. Eerily glowing in the grey haze. You still hardly make out the face.

The figure slowly walks towards you, you hear the soft thuds of deliberately heavy footsteps. You feel you’re glued to the spot, trembling with adrenaline, and yet you can’t make yourself move. Little by little, the figure’s face unveils in the barely perceptible light. For a second, you think you recognize the angular facial shape and sturdy jaw.

Your legs weaken in apprehension, your throat swells and fills with emotion, yet you’re firmly stuck to the spot. You watch in silent agitation as the figure comes closer. The details grow more and apparent to you. Your throat burns with words you want to ask, you stay quiet.

The heavy aura that presses down on you greets you with the visual of a painfully recognizable emblem. Your eyes wander up further to a face you’d recognize anywhere. Your heart skips a beat, or two, while shock rushes down your body like cold water. A name catches on your tongue, you don’t have the energy to say it.

The red eyes that stare you down slowly widen in surprise, a flash of familiarity flickers through them. His mouth moves without sound before he tenses his jaw. Sharp fangs glint faintly in the pale light.

Restless silence seemingly stretches on for hours, not a word from either of you. In actuality, it’s only been a few minutes. Then, a deep, not quite familiar voice speaks.

“Why are you still here?” He looks down at you, brows lightly creasing.

The phrase rings in your head. You heard it many a time before. It plays like a song, you never tire of it. Your breath hitches, your heart jumps to your throat.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” You challenge quietly.

Your limbs jitter with emotion, numbing and fulfilling at the same time. You’re sure of it now. The anticipation you feel coursing through you is unlike anything you felt beforehand. A cluster of warmth forms in your body, blooming with emotions you hide deep down. It surges to the forefront in full force.

Without thinking, you leap forward with your arms stretching out. They latch around his body;��your fingers instinctively intertwine. You tighten your hold, this is him for certain.

You feel him grow still, then stiffen. Like he didn’t expect you to hug him. He says your name, low and rough.

You slightly tilt your head. You’d rather keep your face hidden, your eyes sting with fresh tears.

“You’re not scared of me?” He asks incredulously.

“Of you?” You repeat with a loud sniffle. “Don’t be silly, I could never be scared of my own brother.”

A pair of hands hold your shoulders. You then realize just how cold they are, how cold he actually is. The hands squeeze, as if he’s uncertain whether to push you away or not.

“Da-” you start, for him to sharply cut you off.

“I’m not him anymore,” he says, fangs baring. “I’m not who you once knew.”

Before you can reply, he firmly pushes you to the side and walks away. You stand by in complete shock as his form begins to fade back into the darkness. Your head snaps in his direction, your heart hammers in terror. 

You can’t-

You can’t lose him again.

“Just like when you thought we’d leave you because you weren’t human anymore?” You state boldly.

He abruptly stops, his form stiller than a statue. Just like before. His shoulders strain with the amount of force he applies to his hands. They ball up into tight fists, shivering. His head bends back a little, his face crunches in frustration and a sliver of amusement.

You stare at him, eyes wide and tingling with unshed tears. You hold your breath, unwilling to break your focus. That he’ll be gone in a blink if it does.

He turns back around on his heel, eyes hard, and stare right into your soul. You exhale shakily and hastily blink your eyes. Wetness pools in the corner of your eyes, disrupting the view of a dark shape coming towards you. You pay little mind; your breath quickens and grows shakier with each intake.

Hands hold your shoulders and direct you somewhere, your sense of direction is dull. Your legs move without protest. There is still a lot you still need to take in and process.

Your body settles down to something sturdy, relaxing with your legs swaying about from a ledge. You sit back with your arms behind you, you still breathe shakily. Every breath seems to draw out the tears. They slowly drip down your face, the streaks drying as soon as they form. You’re faintly aware of someone sitting next to you, silent and comforting.

The persistently unfamiliar voice breaks the silence again.

“I’m surprised you don’t hate me,” he says bluntly.

You shutter your eyes to get your bearings again. They flick to the side for a quick glimpse of his visage.

“Da…” you stop yourself. If he doesn’t want you to call him ‘Danny’, then you honestly aren’t sure what to call him otherwise.

He picks up on your hesitation. “Dan.”

That doesn’t even sound like him.

“What happened to you?”

You avoid meeting his gaze, looking down at yourself. At the moment, you’re nearly glad that the grey haze obscures him from you.

“I don’t think you’d understand,” Dan says with a deep, drawn out sigh.

It strikes a chord in you. He’s still there, even if it’s just a tiny fragment. You squint your eyes for a second, hardly caring that tears continue to flow.

“You disappeared,” you say quietly.

Dan looks down at you, his eyes narrow and his body still with apprehension. The ledge you both sit on seemingly tilts. Unease makes your stomach drop. Slow, steady breaths that display immense control emit from Dan.

“After…” Dan’s voice fades. He shakes his head, eyes shut tight.

The memory of losing his family still hurts him. You lean to the side, your hand inches towards him. You want to hold him and comfort him. Dan starts again, you hastily draw your hand away from his.

“I was lost. You know, in my head. It messes with you and after a while, you… start to forget some stuff,” Dan says slowly, clearly uncertain if he wants to delve into it more. “It… numbed some pain.”

You nod along quietly, letting Dan have his moment first. You feel it’s appropriate, since this isn’t necessarily about you.

“You sure you don’t hate me?” Dan asks, ripping you from your mental musing.

“How could I?” You say, breath hitching with held back sniffles.

Your hands clench the metallic ledge tightly, it digs into your hands. You can’t let go, otherwise you may as well as be in a free fall. Your body aches with years of emotions of all kinds. Some of it is unpleasant, a hot acidic spray that burns the back of your throat. Others are deeper, reaching deep into your mind and pushes the tears to your eyes. You shrink into yourself.

Fat, slick tears stream down your face. Your body twitches in discomfort, you inhale deeply to swallow down the emotions. They drop into your stomach like lead. Your breath stutters as the uncomfortable sensation of what feels like bloating fills your stomach.

“You lost your family,” you say hoarsely. “I lost you, I lost my brother.”

Your facial muscles pull and burn as more and more tears streak down your cheeks with the intensity of a waterfall. You raise a hand to your chest, you stare blearily at it through the teardrops. Without a second thought, you throw your full weight to the side.

“I missed you, you jerk…” you croak, words and throat thick with emotion.

Dan grunts loudly in surprise when you latch onto him with a hug, he leans back to absorb the impact. Your arms are firm and secure around his neck, you exhale weakly in relief. Dan’s arms slowly wrap around your shoulders, occasionally twitchy but gentle.

He’s been silent the entire time. Words aren’t necessary.

They will be at some point.

But it’s better than nothing at all.

[httpwintersoldier]

『 death of peace of mind | ch6 』

masterlist | previous ↢ six ↣ next

𝖑𝖔𝖛𝖊'𝖘 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖉𝖊𝖆𝖙𝖍 𝖔𝖋 𝖕𝖊𝖆𝖈𝖊 𝖔𝖋 𝖒𝖎𝖓𝖉 - a slow burn between a hate-filled person and a sorrow-filled soldier

The conversations with Bucky at the bar became somewhat odd. You no longer felt the need or the will to insult him. Not because you felt like you owed him something (when maybe you did), but because the rage and annoyance you used to feel in his presence were no longer there. Insetead, you felt comfort more often than not.

When he came in the door you felt safe, relieved even. The bickering continued, obviously, after all that was the only way you two knew how to communicate, however they were just playful remarks, instead of snarky and rude ones.

"Sorry! We're closed!" You said, in the nicest voice possible, afraid you'd piss off whoever was coming through the door at 3am.

"But there's still-"

Before the man could finish the sentece, Bucky turned around to look at the man.

"Does the word closed confuse you?"

The question was met with no reply, simply incentivating the man to leave and close the door as he did so.

"Thanks, Buck."

Bucky smiled at the nickname.

"Buck?" He asked, standing up and handing you his empty cup so you could finish closing up.

"Yeah! You don't like it?" You asked, cocking your head to the side as you passed his cup under water and wiped it clean.

"I do, it was just... Steve used to call me that. Reminded me of him."

"Oh..."

It was all you could say. You felt bad for bringing up memories of his dead friend. Bucky could read you like a book at this point and laughed, clearly being able to tell you felt sorry for mentioning it.

"It's okay, Y/N. I miss him, but I'm happy one of us got their happy ending."

You looked at Bucky as he said that, and you could very well see the sadness, sorrow and longing underneath the sad smile he used to try to mask those emotions.

"You'll get yours too, Bucky."

He just walked towards the door, opened it and kept it open with his body as he shoved his hands in his pockets, waiting for you to turn off the lights and exit the establishment.

"Maybe, who knows."

The walk to your house was silent. You were getting used to Bucky's silence, and you started understanding why he enjoyed it so much. There was something so comfortable, so... intimate, with being able to sit in silence with someone. It was a lot easier to strike up a conversation and keep it going, but you truly had to be at peace with someone to sit with them (or walk with them) in silence.

After that day, the Soldier simply wouldn't let you walk home alone. He told you it was because his house was on the way anyways, but you knew (and he knew you knew) that Bucky just wanted to make sure you were safe. You'd sometimes tease him about it, and he would threaten to leave every time, but he stayed every time.

If the situation in the town got a little tricky, he'd even keep watch outside of your building. Bucky wanted to make sure you never had to feel the fear, the uncertainty, the entrapment... Because he knew what that desperation felt like. He knew it all too well.

"Right so," you said as you came to a stop, at the door of your building "I assume I will see you tomorrow, drinking up all of my stock of scotch?"

"Actually, no," he said, with a serious face, and your smile faded "I might be drinking up your stock of bourbon."

You laughed with him at the shitty joke and punched his arm jokingly. Except it ended up being the wrong arm, and punching vibranium hurt. Like a bitch.

"Ow, motherfucker!" You complained, your eyebrows furrowed in pain as you caressed your knuckles.

Bucky laughed, as hard as you had ever seen him, hand over his heart and all.

"How am I the guilty one? I'm the poor soul who got assaulted!" Bucky retorted.

"Well, it was your arm that caused me harm."

The soldier playfully rolled his eyes at your dramatic antics.

"Fine, I'll take the blame." Bucky said, as he took a hold of your 'injured' hand and kissed your knuckles "Apologies, Miss Y/N."

You could control the smile that desperately wanted to rip across your face, you couldn't, however, help how hot your whole body felt.

"Yes, that will suffice, thank you soldier." You replied, joining in on his joke.

After a shared shy laugh, you bid your goodbyes, not knowing you'd meet a lot sooner than expected.

You stripped down and grabbed an old shirt you'd wear to sleep in warm nights, and as soon as your body hit the mattress your eyes closed and you drifted off to sleep.

You had had nightmares before, but none as vivid as the ones you had that day. It was terrifying. Images of armed men threatening you, their hands all over your body, the cold barrel of a gun pressing against your temple, and Bucky nowhere to be seen. It felt real, you could feel them touch you, you could feel the air running out as one of them choked you, and you could feel the coldness of the concrete floor of the room you were kept in.

Suddenly you woke up screaming. You were on the floor, sweaty and disheveled, and your throat hurting as if you had been screaming incessantly for the past 10 minutes.

Your body was shaking and you were scared. No, you were terrified. The images were so vivid, the experience was so real. You scrambled to your feet and desperately gripped the paper with Bucky's number scribbled on that you had left on your drawer.

Although your hands and fingers were shaking uncontrollably you managed to type his number. You shakily and nervously put the phone up to your ear.

"Hello?" His voice was groggy, indicating that you had woken him up. You didn't even know what time it was, you simply didn't think twice before dialing.

"B-Bucky?"

Bucky didn't miss how shaky your voice was, almost as if you were crying, and how breathless you sounded.

"Y/N? Y/N what happened? Are you okay!?"

"Please come over... Please..."

You could hear hurried shuffling from the other side.

"I'm on my way."

It didn't take 10 minutes before you heard a knock on the door. You had remained on the floor, crying and breathing uncontrollably, hoping to calm yourself down, but to no avail.

As soon as the knocks sounded inside of your apartment you got on your feet and wobbled to the door. You immediately fell on his arms, gripping to the familiar leather jacket.

The Soldier held onto you and brought you to the couch right in front you as he closed the door with his foot.

"Y/N! Y/N what happened!? Are you hurt!?" Bucky held your face in his hands and inspected your face and body with a worried look.

"I- I had a nightmare. And it was so real it felt- it felt as if they came back and they were killing me. And I... could feel it. In real life."

Bucky wiped your tears and listened to you carefully. Your words sent a shiver down his spine, he knew all to well what you meant, what you felt. And he was scared that it would became part of your routine, like it was now part of his.

"It's okay. I have them too." Bucky confessed, as he held you close to his chest and brushed your hair with his hand.

Your hands were still desperately clinging to him, as if you believed he'd disappeared if you didn't hold him.

You looked up at Bucky, to find his big, beautiful blue eyes staring right back at you.

"How do you make them go away?"

The question broke Bucky's heart. He didn't have the answer, and that was about the only thing Bucky couldn't protect you against: your own mind. He would know.

"I... I don't know doll."

There was a tense silence, as the words processed in your mind.

"So you just keep having them?"

The sad smile on his lips served as confirmation.

"I'm sorry..."

The soldier caressed your face and smiled, genuinely this time.

"It's okay doll. I'm here for you. Whenever you need, I'll be here to help you, because I know exactly what you're going through, I know what it does to you."

Your faces were close, dangerously close.

"Why?"

Bucky cocked his head ever so slightly, as if asking what you meant by the question.

"Why are you always here for me... We never got along. But you've helped me so much..."

The Soldier caressed your face with his thumb, looking deeply into your eyes.

"It just feels right, I guess."

Your faces got closer and closer, almost as if there was some sort of magnetism between your bodies, and before you knew it, his lips were on yours.

As soon as your lips connected, it felt like electricity was flowing through your body. Your heart was beating dangerously fast again, but this time, due to ecstasy.

Your bodies moved in sync, almost as if you had prepared this beforehand, as Bucky sat straight and you climbed onto his lap. Your arms wrapped around his neck as the soldier's hands travelled up your naked thighs and ass, so they could cheekily rest on the small of your back.

Bucky's tongue entered your mouth, and that was probably the first time you welcomed his dominance so openly, and he didn't miss it, purposefully smiling into the kiss.

When you pulled away, you were both breathless.

"Are you more calm?" Bucky asked, inspecting your face, a little afraid of your reaction (even though you had kissed him back) as he brushed a stray hair away from your face.

"I... am." You confessed, playing with the hairs on his nape.

Bucky kissed your cheek, and then your lips once more.

"Good."

There was silence, and Bucky could tell you wanted to say something, but you were just trying to figure out how, so he gave you time.

"Do you think you could... stay?"

"Yeah, I can. I can stay, I'll stay as long as you want me to."

[TAGS]

@kandis-mom ; @ashovertheriver ; @browneyedgirl22 ; @verygraphicink

[headstoned]

S T O C K H O L M 🍒 S Y N D R O M E

《Toki Wartooth, Metalocalypse》

Warnings: abduction, cursing, alcohol/drug use/mention,

Chapter 2, Fade To Black

"no one but me; an save myself; but it's too late; now I can't think; think why I should even try..."

-metallica

°•♡

Chapter 1; "Oh boys..." Toki groaned to himself. Little did he know.

Little did he know what he was in for.

It was loud until the lights came on over the stage. It was empty. Not even a drum set or microphone. The fog machines cut on, as routinely, but still no band. There were no cheers. Only confused murmurs. Even the scent of earthy marijuana arose, but there was still no band. Minutes passed before people started shouting angrily and starting a mob.

Then a man stepped onto the stage, announcing that the band was... gone.

°•♡

"What the fuck?! You alcoholics would really go out of your way to kidnap a whole ass goddamn band for kicks?!"

"Reefer!"

"Yeah! Be more original! Wait are we in a fucking plane?"

"No, dumbass."

"Noia, get us out of heeere!!"

"Dumbass, I am also tied up, just be quiet. Please!"

The room was so pitch black you couldn't tell who you were talking to. They had been knocked out, tied up, and shipped to a whole new location. It smelt like beer and weed, and the band only does one of them. The two men (and one woman) were out of their minds from this new type of marijuana they got their hands on. It surprised them that it's lasted this long.

"Oh shit."

"Reefer" was the band's drummer. Active and loud. He had long curly hair that he usually kept pulled up, a few strands straying over his forehead, and looks like 1988 Jason Newsted. He was the one who supplied the others with their gold.

"What.. did you piss yourself?"

There was a sudden burst of laughter from the rhythm guitarist at her own joke. She was Reefer's sister, "Mary Jane". They were inseparable and equally annoying and energetic. She had curly blonde hair, too, but it was more like the Steven Adler curly hair than the Jason Newsted curly hair that Reefer had. They were literally the same person just with different genitals. They weren't twins, Reefer was a year older, but they sure could pass as such.

"Gross, dude."

The bassist chuckled. He had long, dark brown shaggy hair. He was soft spoken and never said anything to hurt another. Though his personality was often misinterpreted by his dark clothes and black metal tees. He was the most tolerable out of the three. "Gasper" they called him, and he just so happened to be the siblings' cousin.

"Hey, Noia?" Reefer called out. His tone serious and foreshadowing a question. "What?"

Lastly, there was "Paranoia", or Noia. She was the face of the band, the singer and lead guitarist. She didn't smoke as much as the rest. In fact, she rarely ever did unless they drove her to that state of need. She had slicked back dark hair and a black and white distortingly painted face and over it, a skull cat mask. She was the only one in the band to wear something other than their regular clothes on stage: a long black witch-like spider-like dress with a high slit and elbow-length white gloves. She was the glue that held the band together, the one who got them popular, the one that got them together. Currently, she was mildly annoyed at her bandmates' immaturity in this situation.

"I think your folks probably kidnapped us uh..." Reefer chuckled tensely and started to cough. By the feel of the wet droplets on her leg she could tell he was beside her. She turned her head with a snarl. "Do not fucking joke about that." She spat. "Yeah, Reef... that was... uh-" Mary started to giggle, "kinda insensitive."

"Womp womp."

"Reef, dude, you need to stop. She'll fuck you up." Gasper said cautiously. "Sorry.."

"Better be." She huffed, shuffling her feet within the scratchy restraints. How these fuckers managed to abduct a whole band? Easy, ... Yeah, how did these fuckers manage? Her memory was fuzzy from fainting. She must have gotten knocked out by some gas.

"Noia, I'm sorry." Reefer repeated. "Yeah, you already said that." She chuckled. There was a second of eerie silence. "Oh yeah." He started to giggle. She sighed out of her nose and pulled her knees up to her chest, resting her head on them. She tried to convince herself that it really wasn't her folks.

The faint alcohol scent... it was like a bottle was spilt in here. She thought. Her folks didn't drink alcohol. That soothed her a bit. There was a rattle in the darkness and the room went silent. No sniffles or coughs. Not even a shuffle. Then a light flicked on, temporarily blinding the four.

"Alright, uh, so here's the plan..." A growl-like voice echoed off the walls. "Oh fuck off dickhead!" Reefer shouted and started to cough again. "Ignore him!" Mary exclaimed. "Oh uh... sorry, doods... for de whole uh... kidnapping thing." The redhead chuckled, shrugging his shoulders. There was a moment of silence. "Yeah, no problem." Reefer remarked.

"Y'know, it's only mandatory that we uh keep you guys in here until we release the new album. To get out fans back, you know..." The big noir said awkwardly. "I mean, uh, you guys are cool and brutal, but that's kind of our thing." The four stared at the men in front of them in silence. The noir cleared his throat and started again, "So uh... we'll be out there- working and shit and uh you guys can uh... hang out in here."

"What if I have to take a shit?" Reefer asked bluntly. "Yeah! What if we get hungry, huh?" Mary Jane added on, kicking her red-booted feet out. She had on some bell bottoms and a white tank top with a denim jacket to pull the look together. Her glittery eye shadow glimmered in the dim light. "Um..." The tall blonde exchanged glances between the other three and blurted: "Tokis will takes cares of that."

"Rights, Toki?"

The long haired brunet lifted his head "Uh, yeah. Sures." He sounded like he desperately yearned to be elsewhere. To not be apart of this offense. And he did. He yearned to be out of here, back in America in that shabby little shop with the girl he labeled "His". He didn't want to be apart of this from the start: he liked this band. He didn't like how the cat last was glaring at him with her dark eyes behind her mask, because it reminded him of His Girl. There was a nature aroma in the room with hints of cheap, manly cologne and sweet, fruity perfume. Yet, he couldn't guess who was wearing what.

As quick as The Talk, as they had called it behind the door, began, it ended. The others left, leaving the door open and Toki behind to collect their needs. "Hey, Toki! Get me some chips or something, man." Reefer said, throwing his head back in boredom. "Yeah! Me, too!" Mary added. Toki nodded. There was no other requests so he turned around for the door.

"I want a beer."

He stopped and turned back. It was the car lady. Her intimidating glare had dropped and she was looking down at her black heels. She sounded defeated and tired, even Reefer could catch the lack of hope in her voice. Toki added it to his list, feeling greatly sorry for the lady, and left the room. The door closed with a gentle bam and the intoxicated ramble erupted.

"A beer?" Gasper repeated almost sadly. Paranoia drinking wasn't rare, but drinking alone? That was a once in a blue moon event. He wasn't exactly sad, but worried and sympathetic. Had the siblings finally tugged her strings too hard? She didn't respond. "Noia," he said. "You could get us out of here, right? You were working on it. The soft one."

"I can not."

"What?"

"I said I can not!" Her voice raised with anger and aggravation. This instance was rare. Especially if it involved Gasper. "You can't or you can't take advantage?" Reefer scoffed. His tone was laced with spite. With spite from all those failed times of getting a record deal in the past. No one wanted a cover band full of stoners. And Paranoia had all she needed to convince the companies, but she couldn't. "I refuse to take advantage. It would not feel right if we did not earn it ourselves." She'd say.

"Both."

There was silence. Not even a smart remark from Reefer or a whiney protest from Mary. Silence. The brunet came back soon and there was still silence. He had two bags of chips and a green tinted glass bottle in his hands. Also a ring of keys between his fingers. Paranoia looked over to Reefer, the chains around his ankles and wrists, as the brunet crouched down on the other side of him. She noticed that she was bonded with scratchy rope. As Toki unlocked Reefer and Mary, only to lock their hands back to their front, Noia shifted in her restraints. They were tied with a tough knot. No amount of pulling from her advantage would knock it loose. He then moved over to her.

She felt the rope come loose and she instantly rubbed her tired wrists. He was gentle with his touches as he brought her hands to her front. He then began to tie them loosely as she stared into his eyes. He could start sweating at how coldly she was staring. Every time he glanced up to meet them, he felt his soul contort painfully. He popped the lid off of the bottle with on of the keys and slipped it in her hands. That cold stare of hers made him shiver. "Thank you."

Her voice was much warmer than her stare. It game him a sense of comfort. Oddly. "N-no problems." He stuttered as he stood up. "Anythings else?" He asked the room. There was no answer.

°•♡

Finally, they had all fallen asleep. They all except Noia, of course. She was sipping on her second bottle of beer. She stared blankly into the darkness. The only sound in the room was her nails against the glass occassionally clicking and the sleepy breathing and snoring from the others. Her mind spun. She had so many thoughts but only one stood out: this is all my fault.

She got them together. She got them famous. She got them stadiums. She got them in this position. And then soon she'd get Dethklok in trouble and their fans would riot. She'd get them killed. It was a risk before when they were just a party and garage band. Her folks.

During her rapid fire self-blaming episode, the door opened. It was left unnoticed as she gulped down the rest of the beer. The figure didn't catch her eye until she felt hands tugging at her restraints. She gasped instinctively and jerked away. Her eyes were adjusted to the darkness, but she could only see a masculine figure. She didn't complain about being untied. He moved down to her ankles and her knees fell apart. She jumped up to her feet, holding the glass bottle like a bat.

"Comes with mes."

It was their server. Toki.

She lowered her weapon and he began to step over the sleeping bodies. There were no lights on outside the door. The others mist have also been asleep. She followed closely behind the brunet, her heels clacking on the floor. He lead her down a hall, up stairs, and into a room which he quickly locked behind him. She sighed and threw the bottle away in a near trash can. Then, suddenly, but gently her grabbed the noir by the arm.

She turned, faced him. Her eyes didn't burn through him anymore. They were soft. Soft voids behind a mask. Her face paint was smudged, showing patches of her rosy cheeks. Her tongue graced over her red, glossy lips, fully uncovered. Her hand went up and covered his. Her long nails were red. There was this energy in the room: his room, which was like a demented child's. His cheeks were growing warm, and his palms sweaty. The energy filled the room, but it seemed to originate from her hand atop his. It reminded him of the record shop. His Girl.

Her other hand rose and removed her mask. It fell down to the floor beside her. And her hand pressed against his chest. His heart, it was like earlier. It scared him. Her hair wasn't perfectly slicked back anymore. It was shiney and wispy, strands falling over her eyes. And his eyes fell to her lips once more. Because they reminded him of cherries.

[raichoose-gone]

PERMANENT STARTER CALL

- Muse Bio. - Like or Reply. - Mutuals Only.

[rin-itoshi]

mc’s departure | obey me

summary: how the brothers would react to MC returning to the human world after a year in the devildom

contains: fluff , angst , ?!!!!&;@;&:idk

♯ LUCIFER

he’s the one to see you off, reminding you of the many things he had taught you so that you’d never forget.

his pride is much too large to admit that he will miss you to death and that he loves you dearly.

after you’re gone, he’s gone for hours at a time, holed up in his room with as much as work as he can take on.

he overworks himself with the intention of getting rid of the heavy emotion on his heart.

everything reminds you of him, even the paper clip on his desk that you had once found under his bed.

he gets easily irritable, feeling rather empty now that you’ve gone and left him alone in this now quiet house.

barely leaves his room, only works.

never cries but gets quite emotional when he finds a belonging you left behind.

♯ MAMMON

he cried every single night up until your departure but never showed you that side of him once

after you left, he cried non-stop, not caring if he looked like a cry baby in front of his brother’s who watched him with pitiful eyes.

once his eyes dried up, he soon never returned home as he partied all day and night.

he forced himself to attend parties after parties in order to forget about you.

it never works because everything reminds him of you.

sometimes he sits in his car and just stares into space, wondering what you’re doing now that you’re back on earth.

literally cannot stand the mention of you or your name or he may break down.

pretends to be okay but can’t go a day without getting upset about your absence.

money soon becomes pointless when he realizes no amount of cash will bring you back to the house of lamentation.

♯ LEVIATHAN

curled up in his bath tub and cried himself to sleep.

stopped leaving his room in general, continuously playing games all day and night.

couldn’t look at his ruri-chan figures because they somehow reminded him of you and how much you used to admire them with him.

every inch of his room has your touch on it and it makes his heart ache painfully.

struggles to attend online school but manages to make it through the day by zoning out in class.

claims he doesn’t care about a normie like you but genuinely misses you

sends you messages, forgetting you can no longer contact him without your D.D.D

writes about how much he misses you on his blog fully aware you’ll never see it.

♯ SATAN

reading. that’s all he does.

he hides in his room and reads every single book he has stacked up along his room, even rereading them if he finished everything.

uses books to get his mind off of you—or more so the lack of you.

will sometimes get excited about a stray cat he sees but stops himself when he realizes he can’t tell you because you aren’t here.

gets angry. a lot.

the smallest things set him off and he can longer feign a smile when he hears your name or anything related to you.

he misses you so much that he wants to tear out his hair and rip apart all these book page by page.

his room is in shambles and he can’t seem to think straight anymore.

♯ ASMODEUS

loses his interest in everything.

forgets his skin care routine and lets himself go without caring about it.

forces himself to go to parties and tries to sleep with someone to feel better but when it fails, he stops sleeping around in general.

like mammon, he doesn’t come home often to avoid seeing the house he had lived in with you happily.

cannot forget about you no matter what he does, and that frustrates him the most.

wishes he had done something to stop you or at least slept beside you one last time.

neglects himself for a while.

♯ BEELZEBUB

poor bby isn’t hungry for once.

can’t seem to eat now that you’re not sitting beside him, giggling about something he had said.

spends a lot of his time doing weight training and exercising to get his mind off of you.

misses all the meals you used to make on the nights you were in charge of cooking.

sometimes forgets you’re not around whenever he’s about to go downstairs to eat dinner.

clings to belphie in hopes to fill the gap in his heart.

accidentally broke down your room door in an angry fit when your absence finally set in.

♯ BELPHEGOR

either he sleeps even more or somehow gets less sleep.

no matter what, he feels sluggish and blank.

locks himself in the attic, almost as if he was never released in the first place.

even though he hated humans, your absence affected him the most after he had grown to love you as a human.

nearly went demon mode on diavolo when he found out that you were being sent back to the human world.

partially wishes he never met you but cherishes his memories with you too much to ever wish for that wholeheartedly.

sleeps in your bed often to hold onto your lingering scent that was fading quickly.

complains to beel that you were nothing but a stupid human who turns their backs on demons like them, but he never means anything he says.

“Why is it so quiet in here?” Diavolo asks as he opens the front door of the House of Lamentation with Barbatos at his side. The man’s golden eyes scanned the entry hall, noticing how it was so eerily dark and quiet that it almost felt like something out of a horror movie. It felt like no one had lived here in over two thousand years. “Hello?”

Upon receiving message from Diavolo, everyone had exited their rooms for the first time in a while, looking like they were dragged through the mud. The state they were in made Diavolo jump with surprise, shocked to find that even Lucifer looked like he was ill. “What happened to you guys?!”

“What is it that you need, Lord Diavolo?” Lucifer asked as he ran a hand through his hair to compose himself a bit in front of the red haired man. “If is nothing important, may I kindly ask you to leave and return another time?”

Diavolo sighed, shaking his head lightly as he crossed his arms over his chest. “I don’t know what’s up with you guys, but I brought everyone’s favorite person along with me so sing your praises now!”

Mammon huffed, “If ya’ talking about that butler of yours, ain’t nobody care right now! We got bigger things to worry about!”

Barbatos simply smiled, taking no offense to the sly insult thrown his way.

Diavolo cocked a brow in confusion. “What? Of course not! It’s-“

The person stepped out from behind Diavolo, catching the attention of every single male in the room. The seven brother’s choked, staring at the one person they had longed for these past few days.

“[y/n]!” They shouted in unison, practically flying down the stairs to get to you. Mammon was the first to reach you, wrapping his arms around your entire body as he tackled you to the floor. The other brother’s climbed on top of you two, hugging you so tightly that you feared this would be where you’d die. “You’re back!”

Diavolo chuckled boisterously. “This is amusing! You lot are acting like you didn’t know they’d return today!” His laugh came to an abrupt stop when he saw the flat expressions coming from each and every brother. “Oh- Did I not inform you?”

“Obviously you didn’t.” Belphegor scoffed with a roll of the eyes, burying his face in the crook of your neck to inhale your scent. “[y/n]...”

“Ya can’t ever leave again! I’ll seriously get angry at ya if this happens again! Ya either go to the human world with me or ya don’t go at all!” Mammon snapped, cupping your cheeks while getting dangerously close to your face to yell at you.

“I’ll severely punish you if you ever leave this manor without giving me a heads up as to where you’re off to. You’re not just an exchange student anymore. You’re special.” Lucifer explained, a panicked glint in his tired eyes as he reached out to pat your head gently with his gloved hand.

Satan sighed, pressing his forehead against your back. “If you leave again, I don’t know if I’ll be able to control my emotions, so don’t leave.”

The avatar of lust whined loudly, “my beautiful self can’t handle a life without you! Don’t ever go anywhere without me again!” He clutched onto her waist tightly.

“Don’t... Don’t go anywhere.” Leviathan said with a sad frown on his lips as he held your hand, bringing it up to rest against his cheek. “It’s so empty without you.”

“Let’s eat dinner together, [y/n].” Beel suggested, his voice full of emotions as he drooled at the thought of dinner with you.

A million emotions ran through your veins as you sat there, basking in the warmth of their touch. It was overwhelming to receive so much love all at once but it was amazing.

A smile slowly crept onto your lips as you leaned into their touch, enjoying the way they clung to you as if you’d disappear any moment now. “I missed you guys, too.”

“What a lovely reunion!” Diavolo exclaimed happily, snapping a view blurry photos on his D.D.D to send to the group chat later.

After the heartfelt moment, they quickly disappeared upstairs to fix up their appearance before rushing downstairs to the kitchen where you stood. They clung to you like bugs to a light, hounding you about your sudden departure, only to find out that you had gone up there with Diavolo and Barbatos to help the man experience human world activities he had never gotten to try before. Diavolo was sure he had told them that but seeing as they were genuinely distressed, he assumed the message never reached.

Even though they were beyond pissed with Diavolo and his carelessness, they were just glad you were back. Them being here with you really was their idea of a perfect life.

a/n: UH YEA K GOODNIGHT

[nevadabloodnotes]

Oooo I got an interesting one! A Deimos x Reader where the Reader went missing for a while, and Deimos found them as a Zed. Angst and/or Fluff, the choice is yours!

Oooo~ I love me some angst! Leave it to me anon! ~Mod Deimos

(h/l) - hair length

(h/c) - hair color

(e/c) - eye color

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Love is Beyond Death - Deimos x Zed! Reader

"I promise Dei, I'll be fine."

"You know I get worried about ya' toots..Nexus City is dangerous and...I don't wanna have to see you come back as a corpse.."

"I've been scouring Nexus City for years..that's how I found you and the others didn't I?"

"Well...yeah but.."

"You worry too much. I'll be back before you know it!"

....

It's been 4 weeks since y/n had left, no sign of her returning. Deimos' anxiety kept getting worse, barely eating and shut off in his room.

Sanford was concerned, he wasn't just gonna let his best friend suffer by himself. He knocked on his bedroom door.

"Bud? You in there?"

Silence...the door opened a crack, letting Sanford see Deimos' tired, tear-streaked eyes.

"Can I...come in? I just want to talk.."

Deimos stepped aside, letting Sanford into his room.

"What do you want San..?"

"It's y/n...isn't it?"

Deimos fell silent, it was y/n...he kept himself in his room hoping for a sign that y/n would come back.

"It's been 4 weeks...I miss her so much.."

He held a small snowglobe in his hands, she made it for his birthday. It held so much meaning to him that he couldn't let go of it.

"...We're going to Nexus City..we're going to find her."

"H-huh?!"

"If she's still out there, we have to help her"

Deimos, with a newfound burst of energy, stood up immediately and packed a bag full of numerous things, grabbed his guns and headed toward the front door of the base.

"Woah, wait up bud!"

Sanford ran after him with his hook in hand but Deimos was already too far away, he stopped himself and went back inside the base.

Deimos couldn't stop running, going in through a hidden tunnel into the city he began to search for her.

"y/n?! Where are you?!"

A soft groan echoed through the area, he followed the repeating sound eventually coming to an alleyway. He shone his flashlight down to reveal a familiar shape. The (h/l) (h/c) hair...that outfit that he helped pick out for her...

"y/n? Is that you?"

Upon the sudden noise, the figure turned to face Deimos. He froze up, all the hope he had shattered...the torn-up, green skin and cold faded (e/c) eyes...she was a Zed now..those zombie bastards got to her first..

"y-y/n...n-no..."

She got up from her meal, the viciously eaten corpse flopping onto the ground. Slowly limping towards Deimos with a violent growl.

"y/n! Stop! It's me, Deimos!"

She slowed to a halt. Staring at him with a somewhat curious expression, a soft moan sounded from her as she gazed at his distressed expression.

"...Dei....mos...?"

"Toots...it's me....do you remember me..?"

It took a minute or two, but she remembered him, stepping away from him with a shriek.

"St..ay.....b..ac..k..."

"y/n...it's okay..don't be afraid.."

She snapped at him hoping to deter him away from her but he kept coming toward her.

"Dei...pl..ease..."

"No...I'm not leaving you..not this time. We'll get you back to the base and get ya to Doc, he'll help ya"

"I...dou..bt....it..."

He slowly pulled her into a gentle hug, not wanting to let go after having her missing for so long, just wanting to comfort her through this dark time.

"W..hy..? Why....di..d..you...com..e....ba..ck?"

"I was worried y/n...those 4 weeks spent without you were the worst...that and Sanford got my energy and hope up to come find you.."

She was silent for a bit, trying to remember bits and pieces of her memory.

"Ar..e.....the..y...ok?"

"Yeah...they're fine..base felt...empty..even Doc was quite sluggish without you there.."

"...C..an....we...g..o....bac..k?"

"Oh honeycakes...I thought you'd never ask..~"

Carefully helping her up, they slowly traveled back to the Anti-AAHW base, Sanford greeted them at the door.

"It's really you y/n...come on, we'll get you to Doc.."

As they walked through to get to Doc's office, y/n's raspy breathing caught Hank's attention, immediately thinking a Zed threat was in the base, he sprinted toward the noise with his Dragonblade in hand and promptly sliced y/n's entire right arm off. With a screech, her Zed instinct kicked in as she pounced on him, looking to take a sizable chunk out of Hank.

"y/n! STOP!"

She halted, looking towards Deimos seeing both his and Sanford's frightened expression at how aggressive she suddenly became. She shook her head and regained cognitive thought, stepping off of Hank and grabbing her severed arm.

"S...o..rr..y...."

"Hey, don't worry about it...it's just an instinct from reacting to pain."

"St..i..ll....s.or..ry..."

Deimos rubbed her back gently, leading her into Doc's office, said doctor quite stunned at y/n's condition.

"y/n? You...got infected?"

She looked away in shame, her head hanging low.

"Y..es....was..ho..rr..i..ble...."

Doc looked her over, coming up with a long term treatment for her.

"Well...I'll have to keep her in my office so I can keep monitoring her..."

He started listing off a bunch of things to help with her treatment, y/n just sat in a nearby chair, still holding the arm she lost. Deimos noticing cleared his throat to get the doctor's attention.

"Uh...sorry to interrupt, but...Hank kinda..sliced her arm off.."

"Ah, no worries, I can put it back on. In the meantime Deimos, could you set up the treatment room for y/n? She's going to be staying there for a bit and I don't want anything else on her getting more infected that it should.."

"Gotcha, I'll be quick about it!"

Doc nodded, quickly getting to work on reattaching y/n's arm.

-----------------------

It's been a few months since y/n came back to the base, she was looking far better than she did before. Doc managed to replace most of the rotted organs with fresh ones, putting fresh blood into her system and jumpstart her new heart into functioning which in turn revived her. She still had green skin but it was slowly fading into her usual skin color and her eyes had regained their regular gloss and color.

She had finally gotten proper meals after weeks of getting her off eating stray agents from the streets.

Slowly returning to who she once was, Deimos had spent almost all of his time with her when he wasn't on missions. Sharing old memories with her and doing the things she'd love doing.

"Thank you...for being there for me babe..."

"Of course honeycakes...I couldn't just leave you in that alleyway, I knew I had to help you...and look where you are now! Healthy and happy as ever!

She smiled, relishing the moment with him. She gingerly kissed him, making up for a lot of missed cuddle sessions.

"I love you Dei..."

"And I love you..y/n..."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I decided happy ending! I hope you all enjoyed this! ~Mod Deimos

[waltermis]

Happy Birthday Baywatch

MASTERLIST ↠ SPITFIRE MASTERLIST

"Happy birthday babe," Artemis said, as she sat in front of the love of her life's grave. "I miss you so so much. It's been a year now... a-and," her voice cracked as she tried to hold in her tears. "I know I say this every time but I'm so sorry. If I hadn't taken that stupid mission then we wouldn't be in this situation." The 22 year old blonde felt a tear slip out of her eye but she didn't bother to wipe it away. "I spoke with Dinah last week after Zee and M'gann dragged me there. Dinah said that I have depression and PTSD. Sh-she gave me some pills, said it would 'help' with my 'condition'." Artemis said, using quotation marks around the word 'help' and 'condition'. "God, my life's a mess right now. I wish will all my heart that you were here right now. Here to hold me and tell me that everything was gonna be okay and that you were here for me... but you aren't. You aren't h-here to give me hugs whenever I'm st-stressed. You a-aren't here to whisper f-funny nonsense in my ear every time I get a right answer on my c-chemistry homework. You aren't here to b-blow up my phone with c-cute voicemails and a-adorable texts. You aren't here to k-kiss me whenever I'm in you're sight. You a-aren't here anymore. You haven't b-been here for the p-past year." The blonde was now silently crying, but that didn't stop her from talking. "Y-you aren't here to hold my h-hand whenever you t-think someone looks at me strangely. You aren't here t-to calm me d-down when I have n-nightmares. The only thing I have left of you is Brucely, our house and our o-old m-memories. Brucely just stares at the door, waiting for you to come back. The house is empty and cold with your happiness. A-and it feels like our memories are f-fading. it's like no matter how hard I try, it's taking me longer and longer to remember you. I don't want to forget you, Baywatch. But it's getting so hard, I don't know why. Mom said that the first thing people usually forget is the sound of the someone's voice so, I've been playing your voicemails at night. M'gann thought I should start to get rid of some of your clothes. But I don't want to throw anything away. I want things the way they were before I took that stupid mission! Ugh!! I hate it! I hate living without you! I hate the thought of coming home and you're not there waiting for me, ready to take my backpack from and ask me about my day. I hate coming home to an empty house! I hate everything now! I hate you, Baywatch!" Artemis screamed, before she broke down sobbing.

"Yowch babe. If I had known you hated me so much, I wouldn't of come back." Artemis froze, hearing the familiar voice. The same one who would comfort her whenever she had a nightmare. The same voice who would leave ridiculous but adorable voicemails on her phone. The exact same voice who had told her that he loved her barely 2 hours before he died.

That voice belonged to Wallace Rudolph West.

Artemis whipped her head behind so quickly that she saw stars but they quickly left when she saw the man before her. He had the same fiery red hair that was absolutely untameable. The same gorgeous green eyes she had fell in love with, the ones that held so much love in them whenever they were looking at her. He had the same faded freckles, the same ones he out grew when they were 16. He had the same wolfish grin he always had sitting on his face, the same one he always had on when they were teens. He had the same everything. Because it was him. It was her Baywatch.

"W-wally?" Artemis asked, in disbelief. She didn't blink afraid that the second she did, he would disappear again.

"Artemis," Wally sighed. "I'm back, babe. I know it seems unbelievable but I swear I'm back. Speedster's hono-oof." Wally felt the air leave his lungs as Artemis ran and crashed in him, causing him to fall to the ground, sobbing in his arms.

"You're back! I-I can't b-believe you're b-back!!" She cried, as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders and burying her face in his neck.

"Well, you better believe it, Beautiful. Cause I'm never leaving you again. Even if I have to glue or staple or duct-tape myself to you. I, Wallace Rudolph West, am never leaving you, Artemis Lian Crock. I love you so much, more than food, and you know how much I love food." Artemis laughed into his neck, smiling an actual smile for the first time in a year.

"God, I forgot how corny you can be."

"Shut up, I know you love it." he said, waggling his eyebrows at her. Artemis giggled at her boyfriend, playfully shoving his face away.

"Don't ask me why, because even I don't know but I do."

"That's because you love me!" Wally teased.

"Shut it, West. Or I might just have to kill again myself." Artemis threatened

"Oooh I'm so scared! Someone please help me." Wally said, placing a hand over his forehead and dramatically falling, before sitting back up.

"I missed you... so so much." She said, seriously.

"I know, I missed you too, Beautiful." He said, as he stroked her cheek affectionately. "I love you." Wally said, pressing his forehead against hers.

"I love you too, Wally." Artemis said, before she closed the small gap between them, for the first time in over a year. "And by the way... I don't hate you." She mumbled against his lips, causing him to pull away and laugh.

"Seriously?" he fake gasped. "I had no idea!"

"Oh shut up, Baywatch."

"What?!" he asked, innocently.

"You know full well 'What'. Don't go and act all innocent, Kid. I know you better than anyone." Wally grinned at her words.

"Can we go home now? I wanna go see Brucely."

"Sure, Baywatch. Oh and happy birthday." she said, helping him stand up.

Wally grinned, "Happy birthday to me!"

↠↠↠

1042 words

[strxwberrylemonxde]

Letters to My Beloved

Pairing: K. Bakugou x gn!reader

Genre: Angst

Warning: Implied death, light cursing

Word Count: 0.48k

A/N - Hey hey hey, I'm back! I thought it would be fun to return with a nice little angst drabble for you guys 🥰 I've reopened my requests so if you'd like to make one please feel free. Sorry this one is kinda bad, writers block hits different 💀 Enjoy my dears! <333

Dear Y/N,

I’ve come to realize that silence is the one thing I’ve always hated the most. I once told you that it was dishonesty and deception (and that shitty Deku) that I hated the most, but now that I’ve grown to live in such stillness, I’ve realized that was a lie. I’ve always been used to noise my entire life, but all I can hear now is the ringing in my head. The day you come back to me will be a day worth celebrating, the house is too damn quiet. All I hear are the sounds of life moving by, the beep of the coffee machine going off after it’s done brewing, or the slight sound of the 3rd step creaking whenever someone walks on the staircase, but it’s the sound of your voice that fills the void in my head, and it pisses me off. Or maybe I’m lying to myself again. Maybe it’s the thought that life is still going on that pisses me off. It’s going on without you, while mine has taken a stop. It feels like life has erased you from memory like you were never even here. Why do I feel like I’m the only one who’s noticed your absence? Everything blurs past me and I’m at a standstill. I stopped turning with the earth.

The quiet brings my memories of you to life, and some days I can’t tell what’s real. I sit in silence at the dinner table and hear the clinking of your spoon, full of sugar, swirling into your coffee cup. I sit and stare at the empty space in the living room where you used to make me dance with you to shitty songs. Your side of the bed still smells like you, sweet and soft, but it eventually turned cold and your smell has faded. What kind of sick joke is my brain trying to pull? Every corner I turn, you’re always there. I can’t move on, no matter how many times that Deku tries to tell me to. It feels like I stopped living the moment you left, and now I don’t know what to do.

Please. Come back to me already. I’m not sure how much longer I can take the silence.

Your Beloved,

K. Bakugou

The last of his tears dripped onto the page as Bakugou signed the letter, slipping it inside the envelope as neatly as he could. Before he got up, he placed the letter atop a spilling pile of other envelopes, next to the incense candle he lit. He silently hoped you were able to read his newest letter. He wanted you back in his arms again. His fingertips brushed the cool stone, cleaning off some of the dust that blew from the wind before he stood, making the dreaded journey back to his empty home.

[kouomi]

Counting Down To You

Summary: When meeting your soulmate is a matter of life or death, is it possible to beat the clock and find them in time? (F!Reader x Sakusa Kiyoomi)

Warnings: talking about death, some sadness, fluff at end, sad to happy

Word count: 3,010

A/N: sorry for not posting in a while! Pulled this out of my drafts, there might be a lil sequel/separate ending to this later!

Masterlist

Posted: April 27th, 2021, 5:30 PM EST

Everyone had countdowns from the moment they were born. It was a ticking time bomb within every person that would be lethal to not only them, but their soulmate as well when it detonated. The whole system of having a soulmate was a double edged sword; sure, if you managed to escape it you met your soulmate, but the slightest slip up could lead you to a grave.

The timer started when you or your soulmate was made aware of the other, such as hearing their name for the first time or seeing a picture. Everyone’s timer was set at different times, most people having a couple decades while some of the lucky ones have a hundred years, or the unlucky only a few years, months, weeks, or even days. When the timer starts it’s simply your soulmates initial and a date on your wrist, but when it got to the last 7 days, the timer turned into one that looked like a clock, slowly ticking off the seconds until left you had to meet them or die.

The death wasn’t immediate, it was more like a sickness. It wasn’t able to be cured even by meeting your soulmate, for as soon as the timer ran out, so did your chance of survival. Once the last second ran out the timer disappeared and was replaced with your soulmates name as if it would be any help at that point. Three days was all you were given after the timer ran out. Three measly days to say goodbye to everything and everyone you knew.

There were other ways other than seeing someone’s timer to tell if their time was running out. Once it turned from a date to hours the person started to become “sick” their body weaker and more noticeably a cough. It was horrible to watch but an even worse feeling was it happening to you.

When your timer started, you were given exactly a year. It felt like a cruel joke that at the age of fifteen you were only given a year to find your soulmate or die, but the date on your wrist was a constant reminder it was reality. You tried for almost that entire year to find him, to find the one with a matching timer and who matched the initial on your wrist but it was useless. Even if you managed to find them you’d have to kiss them to stop the timer and you couldn’t go around kissing every stranger who’s name happened to start with K. By the last two weeks you’d given up, finally coming to terms with the fact you were going to die and there was nothing you could do about it.

You were in Tokyo for the national volleyball tournament as you were accompanying the team you managed, happy to at least be in a beautiful city for your last few days on earth. A gentle breeze picked up your hair and blew it around your shoulders, a few stray strands waving in front of your face as you stared at the quiet city streets below. It was oddly peaceful, a sense of a calm before the storm blanketing the night and preserving the moment around you.

“Y/n/n?” A familiar voice asks from behind you, “What’re ya doin out here, it’s freezing.”

Turning around you see one of your closest friends, Miya Atsumu walked out on to the balcony where you stood, leaning on the railing. You’d noticed the freezing air nipping at your bare skin but hadn’t paid much mind to it, your mind to focused on other things to care about the cold.

“Waiting.” You answered, returning your gaze to the sky as he walked over to stand next to you.

“Waitin for what?”

You glance at your phone screen, seeing it read 11:59 before moving your arm up so it rested underside up on the metal railing. Just as you did so the date on your wrist disappeared and was replaced with a timer, the seconds slowly ticking away.

“That.” You sigh, taking notice of the way the normally positive atmosphere that followed Atsumu had faded, “167 hours, 59 minutes, and 47 seconds left.”

“Hey, maybe we’ll find them here!” He exclaims, a smile that didn’t quite meet his eyes crossing his face, “There’s thousands of people!”

“I can’t go around kissing thousands of random people, Tsu.” You chuckle, pushing off of the railing and walking back to the door, “Come on.”

“I have an idea!” The blonde gasps before rushing inside, making you give him a quizzical look as he frantically looks around the room.

“Why are ya yelling at midnight?” An authoritative voice asks, making Atsumu freeze momentarily before he turns around.

“Kita! Yer name starts with K right?”

“Do I really need to answer that?”

“Atsumu, I know what you’re thinking and no.” You say, watching as his shoulders droop.

“Why not?!”

“Kitas timer hasn’t even started yet.”

“It’s worth a shot! He has the right initials, doesn’t he?”

Both you and the captain blink at him before glancing at each other and shaking your heads.

“They’re backwards.” Kita states, Atsumus face falling at the realization, “Hers say S.K. mine are K.S.”

“Thanks anyway Tsu.” You smile, your hand resting on his shoulder as you walk past him and down the hall, “Don’t worry about it. I still have a week to watch you guys win. Good night.”

The two boys watch you leave, a sad feeling encompassing the room as you disappear down the hallway. The silence hangs in the air as if saying it’s own piece to the drastic weight of the situation, the weight pulling down on the two making their shoulders visibly slump as they continue to stare where you once stood.

“Stop looking at ‘er like she’s already dead.” Kita says, making Atsumu jump. “Yer just gonna make ‘er feel worse.”

Almost as soon as you’d slipped through the door of your room you collapsed on to your bed, an empty feeling filling your chest as you pulled your blanket over your head. Sure, you’d come to terms with the fact you were going to die, but it didn’t stop the horrible feeling that weighed down your heart as it set in that this was your last week. In another week you’d probably be in a hospital bed with all of your friends giving you sad pitiful looks as you slowly withered away, left with nothing other than the name of the soulmate you’d failed to meet in time.

Were they panicking as well? Were they doing everything they possibly could to find you so you could both survive? This was the greatest chance you had to find them seeing as you were in the city and at a large event, but what were the chances of them even being there?

Your worries and questions followed you into your sleep, dried tear tracks staining your face as you fought to get any rest.

Even in your dreams you found yourself on the brink of death, a man standing just out of reach. He was so close, you could feel the fabric of his jacket just barely brush past your fingertips. He was so so close, yet so impossibly far, you found the last slivers of hope you held for finding this stranger in time slipping away just as he began to walk out of your view.

-

3 hours 26 minutes and 17 seconds

They’d lost. You watched with a hallow expression as the boys dressed in orange and the entire stadium cheered for Karasuno and their victory, while your team was almost frozen in time in disbelief at the final score. After what felt like hours you all walked off the court, silence haunting the group as they all sulked.

“I’m sorry Y/n.”

You turn around and see a few of the boys standing in front of you almost at the brink of tears, their sad gazes only getting worse as they fell upon you.

“Ya said that you’d be watching us win until...” Atsumu continues, his hand clenching into a fist as he trails off, “But we lost. Sorry.”

“Stop being so dramatic, Tsu.” You say, making his expression turn to one of surprise as he and his brother look to you, “Just being able to see you guys play like that was good enough. Especially seeing that quick attack. Man, that was cool!”

They both smile slightly and so do you, walking closer and hugging them both with one arm. You close your eyes for a moment and relish in the hug, imprinting the feeling on your mind as one of your favorite. They squeeze you to themselves though you don’t mind, the three of you standing there for what felt like hours. You wished you could stay there for hours, stand in the arms of the people you considered family. You wanted to stay with them, with the whole team and make more memories, to keep living with them. Your heart ached for the wish as you knew it was an impossible request, knowing this most likely would be the last time you could hug them. If only there was more time, just a few more days. But the timer on your wrist continues to tick, the seconds going by and your time running out.

After a while you finally let go and walked out with the others, the air not as heavy as it previously was though the discord in your head running wild.

0 hours 10 minutes and 43 seconds

“Hey Y/n, are you coming?” Aran asks, standing on the first stair of the bus and looking to you.

You look down at your wrist and read the numbers, feeling a pull at your heart.

“I’m gonna take a walk really quick, can you guys wait a few minutes?” You ask.

He nods, hiding his worry for you behind a slight frown before he climbs into the bus, the doors shutting behind him and the engine starting as the bus waits to leave.

You sigh as you turn around and start walking down the sidewalk, a cough racking your sore body as you did so. Everything hurt and your legs resisted every movement, but you refused to spend these few minutes stuck in the bus.

0 hours 2 minutes and 24 seconds

Finally you came across a bench where you collapsed, a grunt leaving your body as you finally relieve your legs of your weight. Your head was thrown back on the back of the bench and you stared up at the cloudless sky, the stars seeming to laugh as they stared at your disheveled state.

“Could you not sit so close?”

You turn your head to the side and see another person on the bench next to you. With a sigh you scoot over, wincing at the burning sensation in your arms as you do so. The stranger hunches over himself and you hear the all too familiar sound of coughing, their fit lasting almost an entire minute before they straighten themselves out again.

“Are you okay?” You ask, turning your gaze away from the sky to look at them.

“Fine.” He mumbles though another cough gives away his lie, “There’s not enough time for me to care.”

You give a light laugh, a cough of your own stopping it short. “Time’s a bitch, huh?”

“Sure.”

0 hours 0 minutes and 53 seconds

“What’s your name?” You ask after a few seconds of silence.

“... Sakusa. Sakusa Kiyoomi.”

Your heart seems to stop as you hear this, the world around you suddenly coming to a halt as you blink at him.

“You’re joking right?” You ask in disbelief. Surely this was some kind of messed up prank, it wasn’t possible.

“Why would I be joking?” He responds, “Who’re you?”

“Y/n. Y/l/n.”

You see his eyes widen as he turns to face you, his once defeated appearance gaining new life though the exhaustion is still visible in his droopy shoulders and bags under his eyes. Despite the mask covering half of his face you could tell he was attractive, dark brown eyes that bore into yours slightly obscured by long curls. There were two moles on his forehead that were hardly visible in the low light, his intense expression almost forcing you to look away.

0 hours 0 minutes and 32 seconds

“Are you...” He starts, eyes glancing down for a moment, “Your wrist.”

0 hours 0 minutes and 27 seconds

You read the number in your head as you held out a shaky arm for him to see, a small gasp leaving your lips as he holds out his own for you to see a timer in sync with your own and your initials just below it.

0 hours 0 minutes and 20 seconds

“I’m... we’re not gonna die.” You breathe, your eyes moving up and meeting his again, “I know we just met but I don’t think there’s enough time for us to spare.”

He blinks at you, almost too shocked to respond.

0 hours 0 minutes and 16 seconds

“Can I kiss you?” You ask, anxiously waiting for his response.

0 hours 0 minutes and 13 seconds

Sakusa doesn’t say anything, his other hand unsteadily reaching up to pull his mask off.

0 hours 0 minutes and 8 seconds

Almost in slow motion he leans closer to you, his body almost towering over your own as he rests on one of his hands.

0 hours 0 minutes and 5 seconds

You see your breath in the cold air as you tilt your head up to look at him, fighting back the cough in your lungs as everything around you seems to be slowly clicking into place.

0 hours 0 minutes and 3 seconds

You lean closer to him, his breath dancing on your lips. Just before you meet your body seems to give out beneath you, this small slip up seeming as if it’s been waiting to rip away your last few seconds to save your life.

0 hours 0 minutes and 2 seconds

Sakusas other arm shoots out and hooks under your back, holding you up and closer to himself.

0 hours 0 minutes and 1 second

As soon as you were supported in his grasp you leaned up and pressed your lips against his, your eyes fluttering shut as you put all of your hope and fear into this one moment. The kiss is short but it felt as if something you were missing all your life, your body feeling reenergized and the air escaping your lungs as you pull away.

You blink at each other for a moment before you both look at your wrists, joy filling you both when you see the timer stopped at one second. Below it where there was once only two letters is now each other’s names, the sight making butterflies fly through your stomach.

Realizing his arm was still around you, a light blush dusts your cheeks as you suddenly acknowledge how close you were to each other.

“Y/n?” You hear Atsumu yell from down the street, Sakusas arm pulling away from you as he approaches. “We were lookin all over for you, are ya okay?”

“I’m okay.” You smile, “And you don’t need to find a replacement for me just yet.”

“Huh?” He asks, finally noticing the boy next to you, “Oh hey Sakusa, what’re ya doin- wait.”

“Hi.” He says, cringing as Atsumu seems to explode.

“Y/n, you and Sakusa?!” He exclaims, “I can’t believe this!”

“Why are you yelling so much Tsu?” You ask though give him a smile, “Why were you looking for me?”

“Oh yeah, Coach wants to leave.” Atsumu answers, “And ya were gone a while, we got worried.”

“I’ll be there in a second.” You say, nodding for him to leave. He gives a loud “ohh” when he finally understands what you were implying, giving a thumbs up before jogging back the way he came.

“I should probably head back too.” Sakusa says, standing from the bench and stumbling slightly.

“Sakusa?” You ask, standing as well. He turns around, pulling his mask back over his face and shoving his hands in his pockets.

“Kiyoomi.” He says in an almost shy tone.

“Kiyoomi.” You repeat, smiling slightly at his name, “Can I get your number?”

“Y/n yer back!” One of the boys yells as you climbed on to the bus, taking one of the free seats.

“Yep.” You grin, all of them giving you a strange look before you hold up your wrist, the once gloomy atmosphere turning joyful as you’re practically tackled out of your seat and into a giant mess of a group hug.

“Yer not gonna die?” Osamu asks in a whisper, his chin resting on your shoulder.

“No, I’m not.” You respond, your arms wrapping around all of them and squeezing. “Now can you all stop crying? You’re gonna make me cry.”

There’s a small series of laughs as you’re somehow held tighter, the tension the last thing on your mind as you close your eyes. What had once felt bittersweet now brought joy to you as you relished in the feeling of being with the people you considered family. Finally, after a year of living your life as if it was your last moments, you were able to stop; to take a moment to breathe. That one kiss had freed you of the chains of a ticking clock and given you the thing you’d only ever dreamed of: more time.

As you all were forced to pull away by your coaches telling you to get in your seats your mind wandered to the boy who’d made this possible. Sakusa Kiyoomi, though he was still a stranger to you, had made a spot for himself in your thoughts as well as bringing butterflies through your stomach. Maybe with the extra time he’d given you, you could spend it with him.

Kiyoomi. You thought, thanks for being my soulmate.

[g4rous]

Sunlit memories (Garou x Reader)

tags: slight mentions of blood, no warnings really

words: 1.5 k

notes: this one is slightly longer than the two before bc I had to put in a lot of stuff here lol but anyways aa here it is finally! Tried making it a bit lighthearted <3

series masterlist

previous chapter

Chapter three

After lazily opening your eyes, pain spread through your head. The blackness from your vision cleared away, leaving a fog in your mind and the painful sensation was the first thing you could register before you felt the cold brick wall you were leaning on.

What just happened? Trying to recall how you got in that position, your eyes trailed to the opposite wall, now realizing you didn’t even remember being in this alley in the first place.

“Yo, you’re awake.”

Looking over at a few large wooden crates, your focus now shifted to the silver-haired teen sitting on top of them. You didn’t even make out a response upon witnessing the injuries behind his torn, black shirt. The puzzle was coming together.

Last sight you remember before going unconscious were the heroes from that mini-market fighting the same person right in front of you now. For a moment you almost thought you were being delirious, yet those wounds only proved your suspicions. Was he the self-proclaimed “Hero Hunter” everyone has been wild about recently?

“So…” he looked at you with an awkward expression, “ you gonna go now or?”

Slightly flinching as you snapped back to reality, now you were left completely perplexed on what to do. On one hand the realization made you feel quite uneasy, but on the other you were safe for some reason, despite getting caught up in the ruckus from before.

“What happened to those guys earlier..?”

“Oh, their bodies are probably still lying face down right around the corner,” he grinned, “if no one found them already, that is.”

However after picking up your distraught expression that boastful tone faded in an instant.

“Hey, hey they’re not dead, jeez quit freaking out.”

You only frowned after giving him a small glare. Your head still ached, although not as strong from a few minutes ago. How long have you been out? Judging by the still-sunset sky it shouldn’t have been more than fifteen minutes, much to your relief. The street was still deserted and silent as well.

“Well, thanks for saving my skin back there I guess…” you looked over at his injuries, staggering for a moment after standing up.

“However, you should definitely get those injuries checked out. I think I saw a hospital or something around here somewhere.”

A few seconds passed as he looked at you with a blank stare.

“Nah, I’m good.”

“Dude you’re literally bleeding all over.”

“I said I’m fine!-“, he exclaimed only to flinch in pain. “-why are you so worried anyways? Just go home.”

“Talk about stubborn,” you thought to yourself.

Though, on second thought you do see a good reason why he shouldn’t. It’s almost as if you had forgotten that you witnessed him straight up thrash some A-classes. That and all the other questions that piled up still haven’t left your mind, but be as it may now wasn’t the time for overthinking. People must be pursuing him everywhere now, huh?

You leaned against the wall, still contemplating the situation. Water droplets from the roof were the only thing breaking the silence as you both stood there quiet. That is, until you got an idea.

“I don’t plan on talking you into it anymore…” you spoke with a tinge of nervousness, “but I do have some bandages at home. It’ll just be ten minutes until we get there, I give you them and you can leave. I don’t think sitting on those crates until you bleed out is really practical.”

The teen almost reflexively wanted to protest but not a single sentence came out. He really couldn’t think of anything that made your idea sound regrettable, and as much as he hated to admit it he wasn’t in the best shape. You on the other hand felt almost obligated to help him out. Putting aside that shocking realization from earlier, he did watch over you after you got KO’d.

After finally jumping off the crates, he shrugged and put both hands in his pockets.

“Eh, sure.”

You gave a relieved smile before taking a look at the still empty street you were both heading for. The sky turned into shades of amaranthine and bit by bit street lights began illuminating the path. The streets nearing your house weren’t as deserted as the one you woke up in, and occasionally you had to move to a more hidden route. Fortunately you’ve been greeted by your neighborhood cat soon after, indicating the destination- your safe home.

“I don’t think you told me your real name yet, if I may know? I’m y/n by the way.”

“It’s Garou,” he responded after looking around, almost hesitantly.

“So… Why were you doing that today?” you spoke as you reached out for your keys.

“Why does it matter to you?”

“Dunno, you don’t see someone beating up heroes every day.”

Taking a quick glance around your surroundings, you opened the door at last.

“You sure like answering questions with a question, huh?” you gave a tired smile, “ah, I won’t force out any answers from you I guess.”

The lights in the hallway were already open, illuminating the other rooms, some half empty. After all you still had some work to do in the house. Making your way to your room, the bag of trash next to the wall caught your attention briefly. You couldn’t remember the reason you left off in such a hurry, not even throwing it away.

“Well, come in!” you shouted from the other room, “just don’t get any blood on the carpet please.”

But much to your amusement the on-the-outside intimidating man just stood there with a blank expression ever since you stepped into the apartment. You weren’t sure was it politeness or just plain awkwardness but it made you cackle internally.

Even so, after your call he cautiously stepped out to the living room, actually being careful not to dirty the carpet as you told. The room was pleasingly decorated, and even if he didn’t know you it simply radiated with your energy. It was oddly comfortable.

And as you finally stepped out of your room with that first-aid kit, a ring on your doorbell caught you both by surprise. You almost asked yourself whether that’s a hero in front of the door, before your memory got jogged again.

“Well shit.”

You gestured an already alert and intense Garou to step away from the door, to which he only raised an eyebrow.

“Ah…” you whispered, looking over to the side, “I kinda forgot I called a friend over.”

“You remembered just now!?”

“I was knocked out!” you complained, much to his discontent.

What were you supposed to do now? You thought to yourself as your eyes trailed from the door to the teen. The doorbell rang once again as to make the atmosphere grow even more unsteady.

“Guess we have to improvise…”

“You’re joking right?”

“If she saw a beat-up guy jumping out my window I wouldn’t hear the end of it.”

He only rolled his eyes as you went to the door to finally greet your friend, adjusting your shirt along the way.

Frankly, you felt somewhat guilty for roping him in, all bloody and bruised to socialize with your rather concerned friend. Well, who wouldn’t get a little suspicious to see a strange man in their friend’s living room. To make things even more awkward he hadn’t said more than two sentences in the past hour, not that it’s surprising.

“So-,” your friend smiled, desperately trying not to glare at the man’s injuries, “- how did you two become friends?”

“Ah, it’s from that monster incident I told you about earlier,” you smiled back.

“So that’s why he’s so bruised,” she glanced over at him sympathetically, to which he only glared at you deadpan.

“Nothing special.” He spoke in a bluntly before yawning.

“Oh, how come?”

“He delivers stuff!” you exclaimed before any other thoughts came to mind, “sometimes he comes across them there too unfortunately. Poor guy.”

As if his deadpan look couldn’t get any drier.

It was crystal clear he hates being pitied, and you desperately tried not to let out a chuckle because of the ridiculous situation. Truthfully you weren’t even nervous anymore since you let out so many laughs. And your constant teasing only made him talkative since he just had to drop something even more embarrassing for payback, making the evening even more amusing. You didn’t even notice the clock struck midnight already from all the banter.

After saying farewell to your friend, you came back to your living room to see Garou already at the window.

“Looks like you really don’t wanna use the door today huh? Well, way better now than having to explain why some bloody dude jumped out my window earlier,” you grinned, to which he scoffed.

“Pfft, yeah, yeah. Don’t drag me into any more of these things though.”

“Aw, it wasn’t that bad.”

“Well, it better not happen anymore,” he rolled his eyes before flashing a small grin.

“See ya.”

You only gave your small wave before finally closing the window. The apartment was now rather serene, contrasting all the playfulness from earlier. Yet still you couldn’t help but notice that smile caught you by surprise. Nothing like that cocky smirk in battle- this was genuine.

[hobbitsnapes]

Dancing with your ghost

Corpse husband x reader

Requested: no.

Warnings ⚠️: suicide, death, depression.

Genre: angst to fluff.

Art done by @s.ktch.y on Instagram

Do not read if triggered by me sooner triggers, please, I’d hate to upset or worse make someone relapse or have dangerous self harming or life threatening thoughts or actions for what I’ve written below. If you or ANYONE you know need someone to talk to please call 800-273-8255

Yelling at the sky,

Her eyes throbbed as she opened them, having a hard time opening them due to the thick crush that encloses her lashes.

Her heart sinks and pains when she’s met with cold sheets, even her own body heat failing to fool her of his absence.

Screaming at the world

Her mind fogs in a daze of smoke, both in deep heart wrenching pain and anger, anger at everything, everyone.

A thousand thoughts float through her mind, some flew by like snow, others pounded mercilessly, screaming out. All of him.

Her feet carry her through the dark apartment, a thick cloud of grey suffocating the air.

Baby why’d you go away?

No sounds of his laughter, his deep baritone voice, no soft pats of his bare feet against the hard floor. No sound of his deep breathing, nothing. Nothing but the memories that seem to even escape with him.

She wanders around the living room, not once finding the will to sit, or leave the daze her mind has set her in.

I’m still your girl

Her heart throbs in an empty, but full pain. A pain that she’s felt now for days, 3 to be exact.

Tears fall from her tired eyes as she looks to the once warm couch, the absence of his tired body apparent. There was a line of where he sat last, her mind wishing, praying, that if she reached out, he’d be there. But he wasn’t. And never will be again.

Holding on too tight

Head up in the clouds

Her shaking hand reached out, eyes shut tightly, praying to herself or to heaven, that he would just be there. Just be asleep in the blankets as his pain subsides for a moment of deep, peaceful slumber.

But alas, as it’s been for days, her hand only touches air, a thick, painful air that serves as a reminder that he is in fact asleep, but not with her, not with anyone, but in an everlasting slumber, a slumber that she desperately wishes he never went into.

Fat tears fell from her eyes as her heart wrenched in pain, her hand grasping her chest as she falls to the floor, sobs breaking past her throat.

Her head sways in fog, black dots forming around her vision as she stumbles slightly, her face instantly heating up. It’s been days since she ate, nothing but the glass of whiskey she downed the night prior, to maybe numb the deep pain she felt in her heart and soul, but it only aided to her memories, memories that made her eyes grow wet with tears as she sat on the floor.

Nothing sounded appetizing, or remotely appealing to her. The idea of putting in effort to sustain a healthy functioning body sounded miles too painful, too hard to do. Not when he wasn’t there to remind her, not when he broke that very promise himself.

Heaven only knows where you are now

Her heart twisted in pain as she looked at the floor, tears instantly falling down her cheeks as she bends her weak body down. Her hands grasp the plain, soft cotton shirt, the very shirt he wore the night before it, tears fall harder from her eyes at the memory, not even being able to think about it fully.

Her hands bring the shirt to her face, only she wishes she hadn’t when the smell of him wafts her nose, hard cries of pain leaving her lips, being muffled by the shirt as she pains herself to smell him. To smell him means he was there, alive, once there with her and not a painful memory, a memory she can’t escape. Her hands clutch the shirt as hard as she can, hoping, praying to feel his warmth again. Now only a faint smell of hun, one that she knows will be gone one day, like he himself is now.

How do I love, how do I love again?

Her phone lay dead on the floor, not once has she tried touching it since the night. She knew there would be an outcry of messages, calls, tweets, so many outpours of people of people trying to reach out. To give their condolences, tears, apologies and help. All that she can’t handle to hear. It’s only further of a reminder that he’s gone, that his death was real. The overflowing amount of calls from her friends, from those who she calls family. All trying to get in touch with her.

How do I trust, how do I trust again?

She only managed to call Thomas and Rachel, her screams of hysterics she screeched out to them that night as her heart shattered and tore in deep pain. A pain she never felt in her life.

Her throat still sore from the amount of screams of deep agony she let out into the world that night, the only sound to be heard the last few days.

Everytime she closed her eyes, her screams of pain and tearing of her heart and soul play behind her eyes, as she remembers the worst pain of her life.

Her throat burns in pain as she screams out, the taste of copper filling her mouth as she tears her throat apart. Her arms wrap around his sill warm body, but it lacked the warmth and life it had only hours ago. Her eyes burn in agony as tears fall freely from her eyes as she cradles his head in her arm, her eyes searching his face. It looks as if he’s asleep, only she knows he isn’t as the color is fading from his beautiful face. His face that lay calm, calmer than any sleep she ever saw him in. His eyes lay shut, mouth closed as if he’s in a deep slumber. Only the life gone from him, only leaving his body in her arms.

Her arms try holding him closer, the weight of it growing painful in her shaking arms as she pulls him in further, wishing, praying she could hear a faint breath. An indication he was here with her still.

Her breath shakes as she stands in front of the door, her heart throbbing in pain as her hands shake against the knob.

She hadn’t been able to enter the room yet, her heart nearly tearing itself apart every time she passed it. She hopes, prays that when she opens it, he’ll be right there, right in his chair talking to his friends and beloved fans. Not laying lifeless on the floor.

The image of his body laying there on the floor plays behind her eyes, the sinking feeling in her stomach nearly making her vomit as her heart wrenches in pain of the thought.

Her eyes close as she opens the door, the clicking sound of the door opening the only noise besides her beating heart.

Her eyes open finally, eyes instantly searching the floor for him. Only the floor lay empty, until she looked over to the middle of the room, her heart beating out her chest.

There he stood, deep amber eyes looking at her.

Her hand instantly goes to her mouth as she gasps, eyes wide as she looks at him. She blinks rapidly, waiting for him to disappear from her vision. Only he remains there.

“H-H/N?” She shudders out, her voice raspy. “Hey baby.” Her heart soars in her chest at the sound of his voice, a noise she never thought she’d hear again. “H-how? I-I must be-“ “let’s not worry about that right now.” He says, arm outstretched to her. “Come, dance with me.”

Her hand shakily grabs for his shoulder, body being pulled into his as he grabs her other hand. Her breath shudders through her mouth as he pulls her in closer, the feel of his body against hers a almost forgotten feeling. Her eyes search his face that look to her, a soft smile on his lips as kind eyes watch her. His face looks, calm, at peace, but not lifeless like the last time she saw him. No, he looked, not in pain no more.

I stay up all night

Tell myself I’m all right

Baby, you’re just harder to see than most

I put the record on

Wait till I hear our song

Every night I’m dancing, with your ghost

Every night I’m dancing, with your ghost

They both sway gently, the soft music playing as the both look into each other’s eyes.

“How is this-how are you-“ “shh, that doesn’t matter right now. I’m here, with you now.” He says, voice soothing to her broken heart. But tears still fall from her eyes as her heart pains at the thought. “But, but you died? Why? Why?” She asks, voice shaking as she cries. A pained look takes over his eyes, his face taking on the same look, only the calm smile remains. “Because I was in pain, and I wasn’t thinking clearly. I’m sorry love, but I’m here now, with you. In your arms again.” Her hand shakily moves from his shoulder to his cheek, sobs wrecking her body at the feel. “You’re cold.” She sobs, hand still holding his ice chill face.

She looks away from him, eyes catching a glimpse of the computer screen. A gasp leaving her lips as she only sees herself in the reflection.

She spins her head back to him, heart sinking in her chest. His face rotting off the bone, eyes glazed over in a milky haze as splotches of red and black surround them. A scream ripping out her throat.

Her screams rip past her as she jolts up, eyes shut tightly as her wails or fear fill the room. That was until she feels his hand grabbing for her, arms holding her in place as the sound of his urgent cries of her name snap her out from her screeching.

Her eyes snap open as she looks at his frantic face, eyes wide in fear as she finally can hear what he’s saying. “Honey honey honey wake up it’s just a nightmare.” He frantically says. He’s, he’s alive. He’s here, they’re both her, in bed. He’s alive.

Tears break from her eyes as she falls into him, sobs wrecking her body as he pulls her in tightly, the feel of his warmth, the smell of his body wash and Cologne, the beating of his heart all breaking her from the terror she had been in.

“Shhhh it’s okay, it’s okay. It was just a nightmare.” He whispers, rocking her side to side as she sobs.

“Y-you were, you were dead.” She sobs into his neck, arms holding tightly to him as he pulls her in further. “Hey hey hey, it’s just a nightmare, I’m right here baby, I’m alive.” He soothes, heart throbbing in pain at the sound of her sobs.

“I-I found you dead I-in your filming, room. You-you k-kil-“ “hey now you don’t have to tell me, it’s not gonna happen. I’m right here, alive. Right here with you right now. And I’m not going anywhere. I swear.” He says, rocking her side to side some more. Both their heads beating against their chest as they embrace one another.

They both lay there in each other’s arms, faces nearly touching as her fingers run lightly over his face. His eyes looking into hers, a soft smile on his lips as she runs her fingers over them. “It was so real.” She whispers, voice still hoarse from her cries. “Nightmares always seem real, especially when it’s about those we love most.” He says.

“I’m not leaving you, never in my life will I ever take my life or give it up if it means you’re here. No matter how much pain I’m in, I’ll always be here with you.” He says against her lips, pulling her in. Their lips connect softly, love pouring out between them as they embrace one another. “I love you.” “I love you to baby.” They whisper.

[raichoose-gone]

Caring for Sick Muses - Accepting 

@virusvirtue​ asked:  ‘ i know it tastes bad, but it’ll help you. ’ (strawberry cookie @ ink)

Strawberry is probably right, but that doesn’t stop Inky from curling up into a large, black ball, their face - and, most importantly for cough syrup avoiding purposes, their mouth - hidden from the other cookie’s proffered teaspoon.

“No ... It’s ... yucky ... Don’t want ... ” They cough. “Will be ... fine.” 

// Thank you! Please ask before continuing. 

[xpeachesncream]

restart | six

[ SEQUEL TO PERFECTLY WRONG ] | [ series masterlist ]

summary: as you and taehyung start to build your life together post graduation, things become more complicated than what you expected it to be. while taehyung struggles with his inner demons, you’ve become the sole supporter, the pillar, juggling different jobs to keep you two afloat. your love for each other has been put to the test as your relationship continues to face hurdles - hurdles that have you questioning whether or not your relationship will make it through.

pairing: reader x fiancé!kth

genre: post grad au, established relationship au | fluff, angst, smut

words: 3.9k

warnings: cussing/mature language, jealousy, lots of insecurities and overthinking, angst, crying, arguments, y/n and tae get really mean with each other honestly, unprotected soft sex in the flashback scene, alcohol consumption, y/n really going above and beyond for her man though

note: taehyung’s one shot for the witchers one series will be coming out.. probably this weekend? i’ll continue taking some breaks in between posting new chapters for bands and restart so i can work on this too!

tags: @enchantaeduniverse​ @thedarkwinterrose​ @sapphirejeon @jwlmnbt​ @bluesharksandfish​ @ra-mun-e @brightcolorsoffendme​ @jungcrookthecookbook​ @sunniejinnie​ (please message me if you would like to be added to the taglist!)

You looked at the new picture hanging on the hall at Jin's café. It was a picture of you, Taehyung and your friends in your graduation caps and gowns. You smiled to yourself seeing how happy you all were to finally overcome the milestone together, how happy you and Taehyung were to have gotten through it together.

It seemed like a distant memory.

"Hey." Jungkook comes behind you, his blonde hair almost covering his eyes.

"Hmm?" He follows your gaze to the picture.

"What time is your shift over?" He asks, trying to change the subject. You turn to him and sigh, checking the time on your phone.

"Mm, in a bit actually. I have to run home and get ready."

"Oh hey, you're meeting that girl today right? To see if you can sell some of your art and merch in her boutique?" You smiled from ear to ear.

"Yeah! She's such a sweetheart, I'm super excited. I hope it works out."

"I'm sure it will." He pinches your cheek. He doesn't say anything else, being that he can tell other things were on your mind but you weren't ready to talk about it yet.

Racing home to the apartment, you decided to hop into a quick shower and throw on some better clothes. You still couldn't believe Brandi had came up to you at the flea market, almost feeling like she was a blessing in disguise. You smiled at yourself in the mirror, the excitement peeking through as the minutes went by.

"Hey! Goodluck today, little one!" You picked up Jin's call as you walked out of your apartment and down to your car. Taehyung, for whatever reason, was nowhere to be found, and you figured he was just out with Namjoon or one of their other friends. You had left him sound asleep earlier, and you didn't think he had any plans today. But, you would just have to see him later and tell him all about the meeting. You were actually excited to, especially after last night.

➤ FLASHBACK

Taehyung gripped onto the headboard as he rolled his hips into you, your clit rubbing against him as his body lowered onto yours. He kept his eyes on you, his lips barely grazing yours as he softly hissed and let out small moans.

“Hmmmfuck.” You softly mewled. For once, the love making felt like old times - the passion. The fire. The feelings. It felt like Taehyung was making love to you like the world was going to end. And the thought of it, the feeling of his body against yours, the warmth - it made you feel complete, and like you never wanted to leave this moment.

"I love you so much, baby." He whispers as he continues to pick up his pace, rolling his hips and working in tandem with yours.

"I love you, too." You softly say as your fingers lock into his hair, his lips pressed gently against your neck as he laid soft kisses along a straight path and nipped at your skin. You arch your back slightly, the pleasure starting to bubble up within your core as you hear Taehyung moan against your neck.

"God, baby I'm gonna cum." He continues to moan. "Cum with me."

"Close." You moan softly, tugging on his hair as he picks up his pace and begins to thrust a little more aggressively. "I-I'm--"

"Uh huh." He nods. "That's it, love."

"I'm gonna cum." Your hands are now gripping his shoulders, nails digging deep and leaving red marks against his honey-dipped skin. It takes a few more rolls before you feel your body trembling under his grip, muffled moans trying to escape as you let the orgasm ripple through you. As you come down from your high, you feel Taehyung fill you up warmly, his body still ontop of yours as he tries to regulate his breathing. He presses his lips against your jaw, to your forehead, to your nose, then back down to your lips before he removes his softening member from within you and plops next to you on the bed. He instantly swoops you into his arms, your head laying on his chest as you ran your finger in circles around his collarbone.

"Baby." He says softly. "You mean everything to me. You know that right? I got you through anything, no matter what." You simply nod before he places another kiss against your head.

➤ END FLASHBACK

"Thank you. I'll tell you all about it later, okay?"

"Sounds good. I know this'll work out. I'm proud of you, you know that right?" Your smile lightly fades. Yeah, it was a big deal, but you still hadn't told anyone a lot of your other plans had been put on pause.

"I know." You softly chuckle. "K, I need to get going. I'll call you later."

"Love you, drive safely." He says before you return the love and hang up. You hopped into your car and began to drive off to the destination downtown. However, as you neared the boutique, another call came through to your car, but from an unknown number.

"Hello?"

"Hi, is this Miss Y/L/N?"

"Yeah, this is she."

"Hey there. Could you come down to Jack's? We have your fiancé here. He's intoxicated and he's been giving the staff a hard time." You sigh and look at your watch. Jack's was on the opposite end of town. You were never going to make it on time for your meeting. You had promised you'd be there to make this work.

"Where is he?" You say as you quickly park your car and make your way to the restaurant. You see him slouched onto the bar, slurring his words to the police men. The bar stools around him were all turned over, glasses broken and flyers from the wall had been ripped off. You couldn't help but begin to cry because you knew this was all Taehyung's doing, and quite frankly, you had so many emotions - you were scared, upset, empty, exhausted. You didn't know what else to do, but you loved him.

And yet here you were again, pushing your goals aside to help the love of your life.

"Tae, baby. Let's get up, okay?" His eyes are glazed as they turn to you. He smiles, but he struggles to get up, the police man helping support him as you both bring him to your car.

"Baby girl." He mumbles.

"Shh. Just stay here." You shush him as you get him situated in the passenger seat, tears streaming down your face.

"I'm sorry sweetie, but this damage needs to be covered." You took the ticket from the police man, showing the restaurant charging over $200 worth of the damages.

"It's fine, I'll take care of this. I'm so sorry."

"If you need anything, please let us know." The cop couldn't help but sympathize looking at you. At this point your cheeks were hot, tears continued to stream down your face and your hair had become a mess having supported Tae back to the car. You silently climbed in, crying to yourself as you drove back to the apartment, Taehyung slumped and asleep in the passenger seat.

You did your best to support him back to your apartment, the security guard offering help but you turned him down. You had been doing good so far and you thought you had this in the bag. As you had exited the elevator, Taehyung stumbled upon his own two feet, bringing the both of you down.

"Babe, get up please." You cried, using all of your force to get him up. He did try his best to stable himself as you stood, but the five steps to the front door ended up being twenty, with a few more stumbles in between. "Please, we're almost there." You continued to cry.

You finally got Taehyung out of his clothes and into the bed, washing his face with a warm towel before you let him sleep peacefully. You made your way to the living room and just broke down. Your meeting was way past its time, and yet you had passed on another great opportunity because you needed to be there for Taehyung. You felt helpless.

You just didn't know how else to do it.

"Hello? How'd it go?" Jungkook asks on the other line.

"Kook, I don't know if I could do this anymore." You cried into the phone. "I can't do it." You cried silently, heavily.

"Y/N." He sighs worriedly. "What happened? Do you want me to come by?"

"No, I-I just—" You cry as you sink to the floor, your back against the wall. "I've given up so many things for him, and he even apologized last night. Saying he'd do better and all this shit, but he hasn't. I knew this would happen and-and I can't—" You ramble on and on, Jungkook worried as he tries to decipher what you're saying through your crying.

"Slow down, and tell me what just happened."

"I didn't even get to meet her, Kook. I was on my way when I got a call from the cops saying he was drunk and giving the staff a hard time at Jack's. Shit was torn up, the stools were turned over, flyers ripped off the walls." You mumbled through your cries. "I told them I'd take care of it and handle the damages. Why would he do this? Why would he do this to me?" Kook sighs heavily.

"I'm so sorry, Y/N. I'm sure there's a lot of things going on in his head that can help explain this. And I can help you take care of the damages, it's not a big deal."

"No."

"Stop. Let me help you." He pauses. "Can you text Brandi and just let her know it was an emergency or something? I'm sure she'll understand."

"I'm so humiliated though, like I can't even face her after I stood her up."

"Listen to me. It's not like you meant to. Just text her and explain, she seems like a really nice and understanding person. Don't feel embarrassed. Shit happens."

"You don't get it, bunny." You cried harder, silently, hoping you wouldn't be too loud to wake up Tae. "This was the last chance I had. I-I told Jimin I wouldn't be working on the shop right now. I gave all this shit up for him and I really just can't do this anymore. I've set myself aside to be there for him, only for him to fuck me over in the end. He doesn't realize how much he's been hurting me." You're feeling so many emotions at once that you don't even know if you're making sense. You wanna say so much, but you can't. You wanna get back up on your feet, but you can't.

"It's not gonna be the last chance." He says softly. "You're always welcome to crash with me if you'd like, just to give yourself some space." You sigh, finally able to slow down your crying and regulate your breathing.

"I can't just leave him."

"Y/N. He's gonna have to learn one way or another." Suddenly, you hear some stirring in the room, causing you to frantically wipe your tears and get yourself together.

"I have to go, I'll talk to you later, okay?"

"Okay. Let me know if you need me, I'll be there." You hang up the call and turn your attention to the room when you hear Taehyung give off a small groan. You rush over, seeing him bent over on his knees on the side of the bed, his hands pressed against his face. "You alright?" You ask him softly, already prepping the trash can with a paper bag inserted inside in case he needs to release.

"I don't feel too—" And as you assume correctly, you hold the trash can up to him as he releases, your heart breaking at the sight of him struggling. You were torn - torn between wanting to do everything and wanting to do absolutely nothing at this point. You were spent, you had given him everything and you were left with nothing besides the uncertainty of your relationship and the umpteenth amount of tears you had been shedding.

This wasn't fair to you, and you couldn't let him keep doing this to you.

After he seems to be done being head first into the trash can, you set it aside to clean up later and give his face another good wash up with a warm towel. He seems a bit better and more sober after having vomited, but you get him to go back to sleep while you head into the kitchen to heat up some water and make some tea. You ponder on your thoughts, on your feelings, while waiting for the electric kettle to flip the switch, hinting that the water was done heating. You pour yourself and Tae a cup - green tea for you, while you whipped up some ginger tea with lemon for him. You walk over to the room seeing him asleep, but he slightly opens an eye when he feels your body dip into the edge of the bed.

"Drink this while it's hot." You say as you place the cup on the night stand.

"Thank you, baby." He manages to say raspily. "Stay with me?" You shake your head.

"I need to take care of some stuff outside." And with that, you don't turn to look at him or give him more of your attention before simply walking off. You bite onto your bottom lip as you head back to the kitchen, pulling out your laptop to start organizing the bills and figuring out which ones to pay off first. You almost forgot you had these deadlines to meet.

It's close to 8pm when Taehyung finally gets up and walks out to the kitchen, seeing you still hovering over your laptop. This time though, you had a bowl of ramen ready for him to go, while you had just finished devouring yours. You don't say anything as he comes forward to the kitchen island, but his eyes are locked onto you. You turn to face the sink and start washing your bowl when you feel his arms snake around your hips and his lips pressed against the back of your head. And as much as you wanna sink into his body, you don't.

"Baby, I'm so—"

"Save it." You aggressively throw your spoon down into the sink before turning to face him. "Don't."

"Y/N, please. Just let me explain."

"No, Taehyung. Not anymore. I've heard it way too many times and I'm tired." You say, your eyes starting to water. "I'm so tired. You knew today was the day I had to meet Brandi. Why couldn't you just hold off for a second, Tae? Do I literally have to give up everything for you?"

"Woah, I never said you had to—" You scoff as you cross your arms.

"You didn't have to say it. All this shit you've done, throwing the whole Jimin thing in my face, getting drunk and acting up." You cry. "You don't think I can catch on? I'm not stupid, Taehyung. Don't take me for a fucking dumbass."

"I've been here struggling with my own feelings too okay, Y/N? It's been a fucking shit show for me and I don't think you understand."

"You don't think I understand?!" You yell, appalled at his argument. As much as you didn't wanna play the pointing fingers game, you had no choice but to since Tae didn't seem to get it. He obviously didn't understand you even though he said he did last night, and that's what hits you. "I know you've been struggling and I've been doing my very best to be there every step of the way for you to help support you. I gave up this shit with Jimin and told him to hold off because I knew you were having trouble with it. I fucking went to the school event 10 minutes late and tired out of my goddamn mind, and I just got lucky Dr. Forneo wasn't done with his speech or else I would have been shit out of luck too! And then today, I was on my way to meet Brandi when I got the call that I needed to come get you because you decided trashing Jack's was the perfect way to show how frustrated you've been feeling. Don't tell me I don't fucking understand when I've done it all just to be here for you! I pushed myself aside for you, and quite frankly, I feel like I've just been wasting my life in this relationship." You say harshly, a little taken aback at the words that come out of your mouth, but you have no intentions of bringing it back. He scoffs, tears streaming down his cheeks as he looks at you, expression full of hurt and betrayal.

"If you've been feeling like that, why didn't you tell me sooner so I could have just left you alone? So I wouldn't have wasted all this time for you?"

"I love you so much, and I hate seeing you hurt. I wanted to do everything in my power to help relieve you, help you get rid of this pain you've been feeling, but I've just been hurting myself in the process. You haven't even realized it. I can't do this to myself anymore, Taehyung. I can't." In a quick moment, his expression quickly turns into more hurt and frustration, his brows furrowing as his tears continue to come down.

"Then fucking leave Y/N! Leave, if this shit isn't what you want!" He yells loudly that you're a little startled by his tone.

"You'd just let me go like that?" You ask shakily.

"Go and be like the rest of them, like I give a fuck." He says, sounding exactly like the asshole Taehyung you had dealt with the night of Jin's café party. "You don't know what it's like—" He shakes his head. "To feel so completely useless and unworthy. To have people remind you and throw it in your face constantly how much of a fuck up you really are." He pauses, glaring back at you. "You're just like Hana, you know?" He instantly regrets it the moment it slips, but it's too late for him to take it back. You cry harder at the statement because why in the fuck would he say some dumbass shit like that? You were not her whatsoever. And you'd like to think you've done a hell of a job sticking by him through thick and thin. Not like her.

"Don't ever say that shit to me again. I am not her." You put your foot down. "I know I can't relate but the one thing I do know is that I gave you my everything, and I did nothing but stand by you through thick and thin. As much as I want to do it all, you have to do your part in getting yourself out of this, too. There's only so much I can do for you. Don't tell me you're in this for the long run when you can't even realize that shit. This isn't how you're supposed to treat somebody who loves you, somebody you call your fiancé. This isn't how we get by together. And you know fucking better than that." You spit out, aggressively wiping your tears. "I'm going to stay at Yoongi's until we leave."

"Y/N." He sighs deeply, following you into the room.

"No, don't touch me." You look at him as you break free from his grip. "You said what you said. I'm not doing this shit anymore." You softly cry. "Clearly, we need the space." You began to pile your clothes and necessities into your luggage, removing all attention away from Taehyung.

"Fine." Is all he manages to say before he's grabbing a jacket and heading out of the room. You hear him yell a loud 'fuck!' before glass hits the wall and shatters, followed by the front door slamming shut. You break down onto the ground and cry everything you have left in you. What did this mean for the both of you, you had no idea. After all of this, you still wanted him and you still hoped this would work out. Half of you suddenly didn't want to leave on these terms, but you knew you had to - to give yourself some space and give Taehyung enough space to hopefully learn and snap himself out of it.

But shit, this fucking hurts.

Suddenly you look at your ring and you have no idea what to feel.

By the time you're done packing what you need to pack, you feel so groggy and beat that you can barely make your way to Yoongi's. Your head is pounding and everything around you feels like dull, white noise. Sleep is the only thing on your mind.

"Hey." Yoongi steps aside to let you in. He grabs your luggage from you and sets it aside, following you into his living room space. "You okay?" He asks, knowing damn well you aren't but he figured this is how he could get the conversation started. You simply look at him, silently shake your head and begin to cry into your hands again. You feel Yoongi engulf you in his arms as he sits you down into the couch and brings your body close to his. "I'm so sorry, Y/N. It's gonna be okay. I got you."

"It fucking hurts." You mumble into his chest and he simply nods before slightly pulling away. "He just let me go."

"Let's get you to bed, yeah? You can sleep in mine and I'll stay out here." You nod as you wipe away your tears, Yoongi also doing his best to get rid of the stragglers streaming down your cheeks. He brings your luggage into the room and gives you some space to change and get yourself comfortable. Which, you do, but it takes awhile as your body wants to do absolutely nothing at this point. You shove yourself underneath his covers, a weighted blanket on top providing you with extra warmth. You turn to face the wall, hoping you could fall into a deep sleep soon.

But, you can't, no matter how exhausted you are.

"In here?" You hear Jungkook's voice faintly outside before he gently opens the door. You don't move in your position, even though you've just been blankly staring at the wall. You hear Jungkook gently shut the door before you feel his body weight on the edge of the bed. His fingers are running through your hair, brushing it gently as you continue to stare at the wall. "Y/N."

"Not now, Kook." He sighs.

"I'm worried about you."

"I'll be fine."

"Can I at least do anything for you right now?"

"I just want to sleep." He nods.

"Okay. I'll be hanging out with everyone for a bit outside. Just let me know if you need me." He says, gently caressing your covered arm before heading out of the room. You sighed and closed your eyes once more, hoping you could finally drift off into a deep sleep.

But your thoughts continued to wander to your fiancé and his whereabouts, whether or not he was okay and where he was at. They always wandered to him. It never failed.

And yes, it was the same for Taehyung. It was the same all the time.

He thought about you 24/7, he even thought about you now as he looks down at the notification lighting up on his phone.

The notification that gives him permission to come upstairs to her apartment.

but when i see you it hurts, when i see you it starts to hurt baby; i can see it in your eyes, I can see the pain in your eyes I'm sorry, tell me baby did it feel right to be with you and at the same time lose myself, my soul is burning out so casually

track four: lie 2 me - fern

[the7thcrow]

indulgence | part three

~

pairing: felix x (fem) vampire!reader

summary: an indulgence grows to become dangerous as the society of hampden college takes note of y/n’s new blood bag.

series masterlist.

word count: 6.6 k

genre: forbidden love. this part is very angsty oh boy, suggestive.

warnings: blood and blood drinking (because they’re vampires lmao), character death, themes of guilt surrounding said character death, themes of lying and betrayal, murder, sex is discussed but not described, alcohol.

rating: 16+

taglist (open!) : @katya-moro​ @leximb1997​

a/n: hi everybody! here’s a new part of indulgence for you! definitely a bit of a darker tone to this part, as we take a bit of a turn in the storyline (but frankly, i’m very excited about it). if you enjoy this, please let me know (only if you want, of course)! i’m a sucker for feedback. and once again, thanks for reading! i appreciate it. <3

previous chapter.

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..

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“No, Felix Lee will be the one to pay this price. Kill him, and the damage you’ve caused will be forgiven.”

The words echo in your mind as you leave the councilroom, your ears ringing. This couldn’t be happening. You expected something terrible of course, but you at least figured it would happen to you.

Then again, wasn’t this punishment worse? To suffer with the fact that this was all your fault, that Felix Lee would die by your hand, while you lived on. No, this was no form of mercy. The Council was cruel, and this was no exception.

As you enter the main hallway, you feel a hand rest on your shoulder. “Y/N,” a familiar voice speaks softly, but it does anything but soothe you.

You whirl on Chan, smacking his hand away. “Don’t fucking touch me,” you spit, staring daggers into him. While you expect him to be smug, or even amused, his eyes seem empty. Sad. He feels guilty.

Of course he does, because that’s who Chan is. He isn’t a monster, no matter how badly you try to make him out to be. No matter how much easier it would be to hate him. You know Chan, and he would never be giddy about something like this.

“I’m sorry,” he pleads as you turn away from him and stride down the hall. “I didn’t think that this would happen. I didn’t think that they would kill him.”

“Oh, you didn’t know?” You mock, refusing to slow down or look him in the eye. “Well, I guess it’s fine then.”

He chases after you. “I know I don’t deserve your forgiveness, Y/N. That’s not what I’m asking for. I want to help you.”

At this you turn around to face him, pulling him into a separate, less busy hallway that leads to the library. “What? You want to hand me the blade? Cock the gun?”

Chan opens his mouth, but no sound comes out. His eyes are wide, shocked by the venom of your words.

“No-no? That’s not what I mean-”

“Or do you just want to be in the room while I drink him dry? Try to lend some moral support, because God knows I’ll need it.”

“Y/N, if you’ll just let me talk-” he pleads, once again placing a hand on your shoulder. It’s all too familiar, and only makes your anger spark further.

“No!” You cut him off, your voice dangerously loud. “You sold me out, Chan. You fucked me over. And I don’t care why, I don’t care how you try to justify or fix it now. I don’t care. It’s over. I have to kill someone I care about, someone… someone I could have loved one day because of you. Because of your-”

“Hey, uh, are you guys okay?” A voice asks from over your shoulder. You turn your head to see Jeongin, eyes imploring the both of you with a nervous curiosity.

Chan plasters on a reassuring smile. “Yeah, we’re good, man. Don’t worry.”

“Are you sure?” Jeongin asks carefully. “Because I heard yelling-”

“We’re okay,” you say, putting on your own fake smile. “We’ll meet you down at the front in a second, we just need a minute.”

“Ah, alright, if you say so,” he says, not sounding so sure. Slowly, he turns around, disappearing down the hall.

Once you hear the sound of his footsteps fade, Chan turns back to you, his voice low. “Turn him,” he states.

“What?” You ask, eyes narrowing.

“Look,” he sighs. “I messed up, I’m sorry. I thought they’d make you stop seeing him, not have you kill the guy. It was petty and stupid, and in some messed up way I thought that I would be protecting you. Clearly, I’ve managed to do the exact opposite. I’m sorry.”

You open your mouth to fire back, to tell him his apology is not accepted, but as his eyes meet yours, you can’t bring yourself to. His eyes are glassy, on the brink of tears. He swallows deeply, stabilizing himself before continuing.

“And I know if they kill him, you’ll never forgive me. Hell, you shouldn’t forgive me. But that’s the last thing I want, for us to be like this.”

He stops for a second, a breath of silence passing between the two of you. Your eyes begin to sting, overwhelmed by the emotion of it all. It could be your current situation. It could be that familiar look of painful affection swimming in Chan’s eyes. It could be a lot of things. Perhaps it is all of them.

“What do I do, Chan?” You whisper, your voice coming out hoarse. “Fuck, what do I do?”

He hesitates for a moment, before pulling you into a hug. That’s the final push that breaks you, tears fall from your eyes, sprinkling your cheeks. You would be embarrassed, if it weren’t only Chan there to see you. Despite all that has happened, there is still that comfortable acceptance that hangs in the air around the two of you. That involuntary form of care that doesn’t flare out, even after the love has dissipated.

“You turn him into one of us,” Chan says. “It’s the only option, maybe then The Council will cut him a break.”

“I can’t do that to him,” you whisper, shaking your head. “I can’t make him suffer like this.”

“Maybe,” Chan says, setting his chin on top of your head. “But is this really a fate worse than death?”

~~~~

That is the question you contemplate on the lonely walk back to your apartment. Chan had offered to walk you back, but you declined. Despite the moment of reconciling the two of you had shared, you still aren’t ready to be around him. He still hasn’t earned your forgiveness.

As you arrive home, your apartment feels haunted. Not by Chan’s ghost, as it once had been, but Felix’s. You can see him lying on the couch, television playing some history documentary you were both only half paying attention to. You can smell his cooking wafting in from the kitchen, a familiar sweet that had long since been devoured.

You can feel his touch against your skin, the phantom of his fingertips dancing along your back. Your neck. Your thighs.

You can’t kill him, that much you know. However, if you don’t, someone else will. No, you have to fix this, and as much as you don’t want to admit it, Chan is right. The only way Felix has a chance of survival is to turn him, but could you really do that? After knowing just how terrible this life really was?

If you had been given the option in being turned, there was no way in hell you would have accepted. You remember that dreadful night, roughly three years ago. You’d been new to Hampden, and eager to meet new people. You stumbled into him at a party. He was a little older, a little classy. You’d been interested in him right away, not yet having a clue about what he or The Society was. Vampires were nothing but a myth, a fairy-tale, a form of media-culture.

This would change later that month. For good.

The two of you began to see one another casually. It was fun, thrilling. You kept each other a secret, for reasons you didn’t understand the full extent of at the time. He was unlike anyone you’d ever met, for both better and for worse. With his charisma and passion, came a strange, devious obsessiveness. A terrifying need for control. You’d go as far as to say, a lack of humanity.

Then came the night you decided to end things. The last night of your life as you knew it. You told him you wanted to stop seeing each other, he refused to leave. He yelled. He broke things. In the end, he turned you.

When you awoke, your new and rejuvenated self, he was already gone. This wasn’t a desperate attempt at staying together, at making you need him. No, it was revenge. You would pay the price for rejecting him, for the rest of your life.

Which was to say, forever.

You stare at the telephone sitting on your coffee table. Could you really do that to Felix? Could you really take away his life as he knew it? Make him say goodbye to his roommates, his freedom? Everything would become controlled by The Society.

The answer is no. No, you can’t make him do that. But as always, this is not a matter of what you do and don’t want. It never has been. It never can be.

You keep this in mind as you dial Felix’s cell, your fingers pressing the familiar keys deeply lodged in your memory. You don’t have to think, you’ve dialed this number so many times before.

The phone rings three times before he picks up. “Y/N?” His voice echoes through the speaker. He sounds worried. Perhaps he should be. “You there?”

“Yeah,” you mumble quietly, clearing your throat. “Yeah, I’m here.”

“Is everything okay?” He asks, his voice full of concern. “This is a lot earlier than you said you’d call. Did you talk to Chan?”

Felix doesn’t know you had a meeting with The Council today, you hadn’t mentioned it to him prior. He knows nothing. Nothing of his death sentence. Nothing of the weight of what you have done.

“Yeah, I talked to him.” You say quietly, before a moment of silence passes by, as Felix waits for you to continue. “Listen, could you come over?”

“Right now?” He asks. “It’s the middle of the day, are you sure?”

“It doesn’t matter,” you think. “There isn’t anything to hide from anymore.”

“I’m sure,” you say, controlling the waver in your voice. What are you going to say when he gets here? How do you tell someone that they’re on death row? How do you offer them immortality? How do you explain the price?

“Okay,” he replies, in that sweet, deep voice of his. “I’ll see you soon.”

~~~~

You don’t know what to expect will happen when you open the door for Felix. How will he react when you tell him? Will he scream? Cry in silence? Or will he just leave, not being able to stand looking at you any longer?

Your stomach knots. You don’t know how he will react, but you know at the very least, he won’t be thrilled.

The doorbell rings, rattling through your apartment, shaking you from your worried daze. You approach the door slowly, hand shakily finding itself clenched around the door knob. With only a breath to settle yourself, you twist the handle.

When Felix see’s you, he can already tell that something is wrong. Perhaps it’s the way your eyes are staring at him as if he’s going to disappear. Or maybe it’s how your hands are shaking, arms wrapped around you, as if you’re trying to make yourself smaller.

All he knows is that something didn’t go according to plan.

“Y/N, are you okay?” He asks, pulling you into a hug. The gesture is warm, comforting. You could so easily slip away, immerse yourself in the feeling. Forget about The Council. Forget about it all, for just a moment. For just a night.

But oh, how selfish that would be.

“No,” you whisper into his chest, unable to look up and meet his gaze. “No, everything isn’t okay.”

“What’s wrong?” Felix asks, gently breaking away from you. He takes your hand, slowly leading you over to the couch. “Did they do something? Did they hurt you?” He asks, beckoning for you to take a seat.

You laugh, although it sounds far more like a sob. Of course, before all else, he’s worried about you. It is just so utterly Felix, to have all his concerns focused on you, and not an inkling of worry towards himself.

Maybe you should have been more like him. Maybe if you had focused on what danger your little arrangement could have put Felix in, rather than trying to save your own hide, you could have prevented this.

So many maybe’s. So many possibilities you’d never know the answer too.

“No, Felix. They didn’t hurt me.” You sigh, looking up to meet his eyes, which are wide and swimming with concern. He’s panicking, that much is obvious.

“Then what happened? Was it Chan? Did he say something?”

You sigh. Time to get this over with. Rip off the bandaid.

“No, Lix. It wasn’t Chan. It’s about you,” you say. He freezes, slowly pulling his hand away from its place on your thigh.

“About me?” He asks slowly, the look in his eyes shifting from a worried concern, to fear. “What about me?”

You stare at him for a moment, unsure of how to break the news. In the end, you decide to just be outright.

“They want me to kill you,” you state. You expect him to jump away from you. To run, or yell. Something, at least. Instead, he blinks.

“Are you going to?” Felix asks, his tone emotionless. As if he were asking what you were doing that day, rather than whether or not you planned to murder him.

“What do you think?” You look at him, trying to read the expression on his face, but draw blank. You can’t tell what he’s thinking.

He sighs. “Alright. So what are we going to do, then?” He’s awfully calm considering the circumstances. Almost too calm. An eerie chill passes through you.

“Well, that’s the tricky part,” you start, inching away from him slightly. Why is he so relaxed? Did he expect this to happen? How, if you certainly didn’t? “I talked to Chan, and we both agree there’s only one way to solve this.”

“Wait,” Felix looks at you, his eyebrows furrowed. “Chan? As in the same Chan who probably turned us into The Society in the first place? That Chan?”

“Yeah, that Chan,” you mumble, almost embarrassed. When he puts it like that, listening to Chan’s advice sounds foolish, but you know it’s more complicated than that. Chan had fucked up, there was no denying that, but you and Felix didn’t have many allies in this. It’s important to accept help where you can find it.

“Okay, and what did he recommend?” Felix asks, and you can hear the resentment in his tone.

“That I turn you,” you say. Frankly, you’d expected Felix to keep up this strange, cold exterior. Instead his jaw drops and he jumps to his feet.

“You-you want to what?” He stammers, taking a few steps back. His eyes are wide, full of nothing but pure terror.

“Woah, calm down! It’s okay,” you say, rising to your own feet, extending your hand out towards him. It reminds you of that first night you met, when he told you he knew what you were. About how his childhood neighbors were just like you. It is strange, looking back on how much has changed, yet also remained the same.

“You wouldn’t do that,” he states, refusing to take your hand. Instead, he wraps his arms around himself, shrinking backwards. He’s utterly terrified. “You want to make me into a monster?”

At that you frown. You know he’s frightened, that much is blatantly obvious, but a monster? That stung.

“A monster? Is that what you see me as?” You say, your tone sharp.

“Y/N, you know that’s not what I meant,” he huffs, rolling his eyes. Your anger spikes sharply.

“Really? Because that seems to be exactly what you meant.”

“You’re a vampire, Y/N. I think that’s quite literally an example of a monster. You? No, you aren’t one. But Chan? The Society? They are.”

“You don’t seem to find it so monstrous when I drink from you, do you? No, you actually like it. So don’t act like you know what you’re talking about, Felix. Because you don’t.”

“But, I do know!” He shouts back, closing the space between the two of you. You stare up at him, and suddenly you see it. The flicker of something behind his eyes. The flicker of something more.

“How?” You whisper, your breath hot against his lips. “How do you know?”

“Because,” he says, his heart beating rapidly in his chest. You hear it, pounding, the blood rushing through his veins.

“I’m a hunter.”

~~~~

7 weeks prior…

Felix hadn’t originally expected to like you. From what Changbin had told him, vampires were the embodiment of evil. Blood-thirsty murderers, who revelled in the pain and anguish of their victims. Frankly, there really didn’t seem to be anything to be fond of.

No, he had expected to despise you. Fear you. Take the greatest risk he’d ever gambled walking into the library that night. He wasn’t even sure if he’d walk out alive.

Especially after what happened to Hyunjin.

Hyunjin was one of Felix’s roommates. He, Changbin and Han lived together for over a year before Changbin invited Felix to move in a few months ago.

Felix had really liked Hyunjin from the start. The guy was funny, always ready to share a good story, or listen to one of Felix’s own. He was greatly accepting, treating Felix as if he had always lived there, right from the day he’d moved in. He was sweet, creative. A Dance major. Everything about the guy screamed likeable, and Felix couldn’t help but admire him.

Right up until the day he was murdered.

Hyunjin had started seeing someone. Although he wouldn’t admit it to any of his three roommates, the signs were undeniable. He’d disappear late into night, and always come home early in the morning. He’d cancel plans because he “had to study,” and when they came home he was nowhere to be found.

Changbin had confronted him about this, but Hyunjin had denied it. In that care-free, sweet nature of his that made Felix want to believe he was telling the truth.

But he couldn’t, because Felix had seen all the signs too.

Felix remembered one morning, when he woke up to find Hyunjin in the kitchen, brewing a pot of coffee. The man hadn’t noticed him walking in, and Felix went to grab him by the shoulders. Just to make him jump a little, nothing too menacing.

But that’s when he saw them, peeking out from Hyunjin’s collared shirt. Two bites marks, clear as day.

When Hyunjin noticed him, he jumped back, quickly pulling the collar of his shirt higher. “Oh! Hey, Felix! You’re up early,” he’d said, laughing. However, Felix could see the falseness of his smile, the intense look in his eyes.

Hyunjin was hiding something, and whatever those bite marks were held the answer.

Now, Felix had never heard anything about vampires before. Therefore, when he saw the marks, he just assumed Hyunjin was into something… a little less than vanilla, to put it lightly. He shook it off. Tried to distance that day in the kitchen from his thoughts.

Yet, the marks stuck with him. They just looked so… real. They were not a human bite, nor any animal Felix could think of. They looked like something straight out of a horror film. The way the skin bruised around them, swollen. The holes themselves were dark. A hollow red.  

Felix should have been concerned. Worried. Instead, he was intrigued. He wanted to talk to Hyunjin about them, but it felt too personal. He’d only known the guy a few months, and the marks seemed to be something Hyunjin wished to hide. He couldn’t just come outright and ask him.

So Felix kept it to himself. A mistake. A huge mistake.

As roughly 3 weeks later, Felix would walk into their apartment to find Changbin curled on the floor, trembling. His cheeks were stained with tears, eyes unfocused as Han sat behind him, patting his back to grant the smallest inkling of comfort.

“What happened?” Felix asked, panicking as he rushed to his friend's side. He may have only moved in a few months ago, but he’d known Changbin almost all his life. They’d gone to the same elementary school, parents being childhood friends themselves. They were close, unbelievably close. And in all that time, Felix had never seen Changbin so upset. So disheveled. Broken.

When Changbin didn’t respond, Felix turned to Han, who was already staring at him with somber, empty eyes.

“Hyunjin’s dead,” Han said, so quietly Felix wasn’t sure if he heard him correctly.

“Dead?” Felix choked, eyes subconsciously trailing to Hyunjin’s bedroom door. “What do you mean? He- he can’t be dead?” There was no way. Hyunjin had to be in there, dancing to his favourite mixes or reading a webcomic, gushing about his favourite dramas. He couldn’t be dead.

“He is,” Changbin spoke suddenly, still not deterring his eyes from their place on the wall. “I saw it happen.”

The silence that followed was suffocating. Felix wasn’t sure what to say. He wasn’t sure how to form words. Shock enveloped him in a fuzzy, mind-clouding fog.

The three of them sat there for what felt like hours, until eventually, Changbin spoke.

“Don’t you want to know what happened?” He asked.

“Okay,” Felix whispered. He wasn’t sure if he really wanted to know. If he could handle it. Yet, his curiosity got the better of him.

“I was asleep in my room, woke up to the sound of banging on the door,” Changbin spoke quietly. “Heard Hyunjin get up to grab it, assuming it was fine. When he opened the door, he sounded shocked. Afraid. He spoke like he knew why they were here. Like he was in danger.”

“I heard them come inside. Hyunjin started shouting, “get away from me!”, “don’t touch me!” I got up, rushing towards the living room. However, as I was coming, I heard Hyunjin suddenly get cut off. Confused, I carefully peeked around the corner. Can you guess what I saw?”

When Felix didn’t answer, Changbin turned to face him, his eyes finally meeting Felix’s own. Felix swallowed, his heart rising into his throat. Changbin’s eyes were dead, holding a darkness that made Felix shiver.

“They were drinking his blood, Felix. Like a fucking vampire. The guy had Hyunjin pinned to a wall, and didn’t let go of him until Hyunjin was gone. Until he drank every last drop in his body. Then they dragged him out of here. Left as if nothing had happened.”

“That… that’s impossible,” Felix shook his head. The story had to have been fake, Changbin’s way of dealing with the trauma. It couldn’t have been true.

“Is it?” Changbin asked. “Is it really? Because I think we’ve all seen those sickening, fucking bite marks Hyunjin has been carrying around these last couple months.”

Felix froze. That was true, but still, that couldn’t have meant vampires were real. No, that was ridiculous. They weren’t any more real than mermaids, or werewolves. It was simply impossible.

But… was it?

Suddenly, Changbin leaped to his feet, storming across the living room and whipping open the door to Hyunjin’s bedroom.

Han, who had been uncharacteristically quiet, chased after him. “Changbin, no! It’s too soon. Don’t do this to yourself. Not right now.”

“No!” Changbin yelled back, not looking back at Han. He began digging through Hyunjin’s drawers, throwing everything inside out onto the bed. “It’s my fault he’s dead, and you know that. I should have tried to stop it, something at least. But I froze! I didn’t do shit! And now Hyunjin is dead, Han.”

Changbin rushed over to Hyunjin’s nightstand, ripping out the bottom drawer. “The least I can do now is try to prove what happened to him. Try to show that it wasn’t just my bloody imagination, like Felix over here clearly thinks it is.”

Felix, unsure of what to say, remained quiet.

“He doesn’t think you imagined it, Changbin,” Han reassured, carefully putting a hand on his friend's shoulder. “But trashing Hyunjin’s room? That’s not going to solve anything.

Changbin shrugged off Han’s hand, scowling. “You don’t know what will help,” he spat, half-mindedly flipping through one of Hyunjin’s old notebooks. “There’s got to be something in here. Something that will prove that-” he began, but quickly stopped.

Changbin stood silently for a moment, staring at the words on the pages with an intensity that made Felix nervous.

“This is it,” Changbin said quietly, not looking up at them.

“It’s what?” Han said, quickly placing himself beside him, beginning to read whatever was on the pages. He quickly went quiet, his eyes growing wide as he scanned the paper.

Changbin looked up at Felix, an unreadable expression on his face.

“It’s our proof.”

         ~~~~

Hours passed and Felix finally found himself sitting at his desk, the dim light of his lamp cascading over what turned out to be Hyunjin’s journal.

Changbin had finally given it to him, spending hours obsessing over every word and detail. God knows where he was now, having left the apartment around midnight. A couple hours had passed, and he still hadn’t returned.

Han had gone to sleep a while ago, leaving Felix alone with nothing but the ghost of Hyunjin’s words that he left behind. A chill passed through him. This was all he had left of him, these entries discussing what would later become the reason for his death.

Felix paused on a certain entry, one dating back roughly a month ago, regarding the bite marks.

October 23rd.

She fed from me today. Finally. It hurt seeing her so starved, so weak and frail compared to when we first met. Everytime I’d look in her eyes, I’d see how glazed over they were, how blown out from hunger. It physically hurt, knowing how she was putting herself through this pain when I could help her, if she’d only let me.

I had to beg her to do it. She’s so worried about them. So paranoid they’re going to find out. I’m scared too, I guess, but I’m willing to risk it. For her.

As for the feeding itself, it’s difficult to explain. It hurt, undoubtedly, but at the same time it was wonderful. It felt wrong, wild. Raw. But I don’t think I’ve ever felt so connected with someone. It’s not the same as sex, somehow it felt more intimate? Like I said, it’s difficult to explain. Strange.

It’s weird, looking in the mirror now, seeing those marks. Yet, they make me smile. They remind me of her, as if I’m branded with the fact she trusted me enough to do this.

I think I’m starting to love her. Even if worse comes to worst, I don’t think I’d ever regret this. She’s shown me so much, I only hope our time doesn’t run out.

I’m seeing her again, tomorrow. I think Changbin is starting to get suspicious, he made a comment about me leaving late at night. I denied it, but I know he thinks something is up. Maybe Han and Felix do too, but they haven’t said anything.

I want to tell them, I really do. But I know I can’t. I promised her. Besides, roping them into this might make matters worse.

I hope I’m making the right choice.

~Hyunjin.

Felix felt like he was going to be sick. So Hyunjin knew. He knew what was coming, even a month ago. Yet he didn’t stop seeing this girl. Why? Hyunjin was a hopeless romantic, sure. But even so, this seemed ridiculous. Why would he keep doing this, knowing the consequences?

Felix’s mind wandered back to the marks on his neck. The deep gashes of where she’d drank from him. The feeding, as Hyunjin had called it. Was that what made him stay? This strange, monstrous intimacy?

Felix didn’t understand. He didn’t understand how this feeding could possibly be a good thing. And yet, to his own shame, he was curious. Curious of how it felt, how it led Hyunjin down this road to his death.

God, if Changbin could hear what he was thinking now.

  ~~~~

The following weeks passed by in a blur of grief and obsession. Changbin was rarely home. Sometimes he was at the library, doing as much research as he possibly could. Others, he was searching for more hunters, anything to find out more about what exactly Hyunjin had gotten himself into.

Today, the three roommates were sitting on the living room couch, discussing a rather important next step in Changbin’s mission of avenging Hyunjin.

“I found one,” Changbin stated, taking a sip of his gin and tonic.

Han frowned. “What do you mean you found one?”

“I mean one of those bloodsuckers is at the library every night the same time I am,” Changbin stated. Felix shifted nervously. He didn’t like the look on Changbin’s face.

“Okay,” Han continued, his frown deepening. “What do you want us to do about that? You’re not planning on shoving a stake through their heart or anything, are you?”

“No,” Changbin replied, although he didn’t seem to be as appalled by the idea as Han. “I plan on using them.”

“What do you mean?” Felix asked, an unsettling feeling passing through him.

“I mean, one of us has to get close to her. Close enough to figure out who this “they” Hyunjin keeps referencing is.”

“Then what?” Han asked, his arms crossed.

Changbin shrugged. “Then we make them pay for what they did to him. The only question now, is which one of us is it going to be?”

Now, Felix didn’t like vampires. Not at all. Not after what they’d done to Hyunjin. However, he couldn’t seem to find this deep-seeded hatred that Changbin had developed.

No, in fact he felt a level of sympathy for the girl who lived on Hyunjin’s pages. For the sweet and generous girl who would almost rather die than subject him to any danger. She wasn’t a monster, that much was obvious. No, the vampires that murdered Hyunjin, the vampires that she was so terrified of, they were the monsters.

But Changbin didn’t seem to see that. Felix didn’t blame him, he was blinded by both grief, as well as the overwhelming guilt that Hyunjin’s death was his fault. It wasn’t, of course.  Felix was sure that if Changbin had stepped in, they simply would have killed him too. But that wasn’t what Changbin wanted to hear.

So, before he could properly comprehend what he was doing, he spoke. “I’ll do it,” he said, causing the two men to raise their eyebrows.

“Really?” Han asked nervously, putting a hand on his shoulder. “Felix, you don’t have to. You could get yourself killed.”

Felix knew this. Hell, he knew this well. He also knew it was the right thing to do. This girl at the library… If Changbin attempted getting close to her in the state he was now, he’d end up getting one of them killed. Han, bless his soul, was far too paranoid to pull it off. Even now, he tried to distance himself from the entire topic of vampires. Maybe it was fear, maybe he didn’t like the spite in Changbin’s voice when he discussed them, but in any case, Felix knew he wouldn’t be able to do this.

Besides, he could handle it. You deserved to be given a chance. Perhaps you were an exception, like the girl in Hyunjin’s notebook.

“I’m sure,” Felix said. And so your mutual destruction began.

~~~~

Felix had met you in the library under Changbin’s instruction. Made some small talk, a little bit flirty but nothing too wild. He was surprised to find that you were rather pretty, a clean academic look and mysterious eyes. He was also surprised to find that you were witty, as well. Charming.

Based on the way Changbin had described you, well, you were supposed to be nothing short of a demon sent from hell.

You were both sitting in silence, Felix watching as you translated passages from The Iliad into Greek. Which he had to admit, was undoubtedly impressive.

It was then he noticed how glazed over your eyes were, pupils blown out in hunger, just as Hyunjin had described in his journal. Which meant he also knew that you were struggling, refraining from eating.

That’s when he felt it, that slightest pinch of sympathy. You weren’t eating, which meant you also weren’t sucking people dry in their apartments for their roommates to see. No, you were refraining yourself, and that wasn’t a monstrous thing to do.

The pieces fell like dominos after that. He kissed you. You invited him back to your apartment. You both went inside. You kissed some more.

Then he proceeded to scare the ever living hell out of you.

The look on your face when he told you he knew still haunts him. The sheer terror in your eyes, the unchained panic and fear. It was the kind’ve look someone had right before death. As if he were going to murder you.

He hadn’t expected it. He hadn’t realized that him knowing you were a vampire would be so catastrophic to you. It wasn’t like you told him, he already knew, but that didn’t seem to matter.

He quickly made up a story about his old neighbors being vampires, anything to calm you down. Then, to his own surprise, he offered to let you drink from him.

This wasn’t a part of the plan. If Changbin saw what he was doing now, he’d ring his neck for sure. Yet, Felix was curious, even more so then he was before. This intimacy, this incredible feeling that Hyunjin talked about, was it really true? He wanted to know.

There was also the fact of the matter that he genuinely wanted to help you. You were so scared, so petrified, and he was to blame. You were not a monster. You weren’t. You were just a scared girl who had clearly been starving herself, and if he could help with that, he should, shouldn’t he?

You were hesitant at first, but you agreed. Climbing on top of him, your breath hot against his neck. He braced himself for your fangs. Yet even so, nothing could have prepared him for the feeling of breaking through his skin.

It was painful, a throbbing ache erupting from his neck and flowing throughout the rest of his body. Felix could feel the blood pumping through his veins, escaping through his newly punctured wounds. He grabbed your arm for support, his mouth opening in a cry from the pain. Although, he doubted you could hear him, based on the way you lapped so lavishly at the blood, leaning into him.

Yet, with the pain came an undeniable sense of pleasure, pulsing through his body in waves. A dizzying, overwhelming sense of ecstasy, clouding his mind in a hazy fog of desire. It was overwhelming, how the feeling casted over him, draining him of anything but eachother. Here it was just you and him. There was nothing else. Nothing but the two of you.

He didn’t want anything else. Your name rang through his skull, shattering all other thoughts that existed outside this moment. His vision blurred, all his senses drifting from him. Yet, he didn’t want them. Didn’t need them. All he needed was you. You. You. He felt himself fall back, sinking into the floor, his limbs growing limp.

Then it stopped. You pulled away from him. He blinked, attempting to regain a proper sense of consciousness. He saw your face, your beautiful face, and smiled.

At that moment he understood. He understood it all. How Hyunjin followed down that path, how in the end he didn’t regret it.

He knew he’d come to make all the same mistakes.

~~~~

So your little arrangement continued, and slowly it began to develop into more. While enjoyable, it wasn’t just about the feeding. Not at all.

Felix thought you were incredible, to put it lightly. You were unlike anyone he’d ever met. Clever, kind, selfless. You held an unbelievable sense of passion in everything you did.

His favourite days were the ones spent at your place. The comfort of your bed became his safe place. Your kitchen became his creative outlet. His home whenever he was wrapped in your arms.

No, nothing made Felix more happy than the time he spent with you.

That’s what he thinks of now, walking back home from your apartment, after having told you everything. You were angry of course, feeling lied to, betrayed. He doesn’t blame you. He blames himself.

He blames himself for everything that has happened. He knew what would happen from the beginning, what his sentence would be, he’d seen it all before. Yet, he chose to ignore it. Some little voice inside of him said that he was different, that it was merely unlucky what happened to Hyunjin. That you two would beat the odds.

Felix knows that he had been lying to himself. He knows Hyunjin had been careful, just as much as the two of you had been. He brought this upon himself.

Why? Because he loves you. He can admit it to himself now, after everything that has happened. He isn’t sure if you feel the same, especially after the last couple hours. He doesn’t blame you, if you don’t.

He should have just told you the truth from the beginning, but he didn’t want to lose you by scaring you again. His roommates wouldn’t tell anyone, he’d made sure of it when he talked to Changbin and Han a couple days ago. Now that was a horrible conversation, Changbin still hasn’t spoken to him since. 

Felix had told both of them that things hadn’t worked out after the first night he spent with you. That way, he wouldn’t feel pressured in divulging anything you’d told him of The Society. As much as he hated them, so truly hated them, he’d promised you secrecy. He’d honoured that promise as much as he could, even if it ultimately put him in danger.

Yet, that’s not what he’s worried about right now. No, he is thinking of your face that first night you spent together, that look of pure terror. It was something he had never wanted to see again.

That hope was futile, however. As when he told you, he did have to see it again. Watch as your eyes widened, your mouth gaping open and eyebrows furrowed as he told you how his roommates knew. How he came to the library that night looking for you. The details of Hyunjin’s murder.

How a part of Felix knew that his fate could be the same.

You had walked into your kitchen, trying to get yourself away from him. Saying that you needed time to think this all through, and that he should do the same. After all, immortality and eternal bloodlust were two difficult things to be offered.

You told him to leave. He did. He’d said that he would call you within the next couple days, when he came to his decision. Then you’d turn him, if that’s what he decided, and that would be it. He didn’t know what this meant for the two of you afterwards, but there’d be time to figure that out later.

Oh, there would be so much time.

Because Felix already knows what his decision will be.

He hates Vampires. He hates The Society. The way they torment your life, just as they did to the girl in Hyunjin’s notebook. The way they killed Hyunjin. How Chan, someone you once trusted, turned the two of you in without a second thought.

But it doesn’t matter if he hates them. Not anymore.

As in this moment, Felix Lee has decided that he will become one himself.

~~

next chapter.