#meat timeline

[eridude]

and everything was fine forever

[disguisedcheezed]

goofy ahh corpse.

[bootpoot]

WIP (trying to get out of artblock)

comms are still being drawn dw!!! i am just trying to get out of a mini artblock

[goodeguy]

~ULTIMATE JOHN~

made myself an ult john design it's based off of someone else's own ult john design, tho i don't remember the artist's name, but i rlly fucked with it a lot

doodles (ft. his weapon the meathammer + typing quirks)

i like to think as now as a robot from the meat timeline, he doesn't have a voice box yet. so he only communicates through robotic sounds and emoticons i don't have an official backstory for him sadly lol, but that he's from the meat timeline

[kosonah]

Some johnrezi inbetween comms

[diesmercurii]

okay I’m not a huge dirkjohn shipper but. epilogue dirkjohn

specifically ult dirk and candy john. like, total control of the narrative villain vs some divorced father. and then they kiss

[cannibalismasametaphorforlove]

I know its illegal to talk about homesick but fuck you, I do what I want

[grubgirl413]

John egbert ate slimmer and that’s why everybody is sad in meat

[davekat-sucks]

I really do wonder if Vriska's VN Hell will address about her part in creating Jack Noir, had planned to battle him to show off she's a hero, but never went through as Jack Noir still lives in both Meat and Candy

Bitch had wasted time experimenting on a lonely girl's sleep pattern with her powers, trapped her friends on the meteor, caused people like Dad, Mom, Bro, lots of Carapacians, Aimless Renegade, their Dream Selves, etc.... to get killed because of him, and by the end, dude is spared from his life and has a fucking girlfriend. Even if the Homestuck Snapchats are canon and that Jane is currently mind controlling Jack Noir there in the Candy Time of Beyond Canon, dude lived in the Meat Timeline and probably has kids with Ms Paint as they piss on Spade Slick's grave with no mercy. Doesn't help the team is speedrunning all of Vriska's arc if they had to skip Eridan and John's talk. The writers behind it probably couldn't make the talk between Eridan or John good because they are too far up in their own asses trying to reach Vrisrezi or June Egbert as soon as possible. Fuck the boys who played some role into Vriska's life. All it matters is that Vriska is redeemed by the end and she is seen as lesbians in the eyes of the fandom. Pretty art and sprites is enough to distract others from bad writing and bad music.

[monster4hire]

vl presentszz…. dirkjake Sadsad radio!

1. Holy ghost - modern baseball

2. Man of war - radiohead

3. Star - mitski

4. All my happiness is gone - purple mountains

5. Lucky charms - moldy peaches

6. It ain’t me, babe - bob dylan

7. Good guy - julia jacklin

8. Pictures of you - the cure

9. Once more to see you - mitski

[canisalbus]

✦ Hound mode ✦

[disguisedcheezed]

Old Ult dirkjohn comic I drew where John gets revived and gay shit happens.

(The "HEHE" part isn't included in the comic, that's just me testing the pen lmao.)

[classpectpokerap]

ill get into it in part.... five??? part 3 is a specific theory about the ending of candy, and im unsure when im going to get to stuff about like... the prologue and meat. bc i have a lot of thoughts about em

rn the plans are

3. ending of candy (rose and dave focus)

4. ending of candy, hs2/hsbc (dave focus)

5. meat (rose focus) <- probably going to get to prologue stuff here

6. meat, hs2/hsbc (rose and dirk)

and im unsure where else i go after that but those are my general plans once i get motivation to write back lol

.

anyway, the short version is, i don't think she was faking the physical condition...? i think her body was absolutely dying from it. but she could have just wiped her mind and lost access to being ultimate whenever

but she wasn't getting ultself stuff happening for no reason.

bluntly, she knew what was up.

or, i guess,

she was down for it. she was down for it. she was down for it she was down for it she Wanted It.

i have aradia monologue about this in my fic clockwork universe (nsfw, mind the tags) but like. i Firmly believe she did this to herself. maybe in pursuit of power maybe in pursuit of knowledge, but like.

rose lalonde took the look inwards and take stock of yourself challenge and it made her so fucking physically ill,

dafjhsgkfahdjksg

god i love rose

EDIT I FORGOT A PART OF MY FUTURE PLANS:

part 7: candy (jake and john) (i completely forgot i was going to get to Truman Show Theory at some point)

What exactly does "gloves is canon" mean, if you don't mind me asking?

let's just fucking get right into it.

Ultimate Rose Pt. 2: Gloves Are Canon

if you haven't seen part 1, here it is. the tldr version of it was to estabish candy rose (at the VERY least) as a liar. i also have a headcanon about ultrose putting alpha earth rose into front in candy timeline, but that doesn't really matter too much. its just kinda fun

anyway. heres the theory.

so you guys know A Threat, Sensed, right?

it's one of the hs2 bonus comics. originally patreon exclusive, but was made public for everyone during the hiatus. and i think it contains some deeply revealing information.

you may be wondering... hey, isn't that the comic where ultdirk talks to hussie about yiffy? like, its hussie's one appearance in the comic. kind of weird.

ahaha. yeah. so. about that.

let's rewind a bit. what's the contents of A Threat Sensed?

dirk wakes up after having the shit kicked out of him in pesterquest.

rose is like huh? huh wuh? but dirk gives her a thumbs up. and then he goes to sit on his computer, and type to god.

and then after that delay, he gets a reply.

etc etc etc. they talk. they chat. hussie talks about his beloved daughter yiffy. normal stuff. hey roll that last one back

let's play in this space. lets play in this space. perspective. daughter.

who's daughter is yiffy?

---

let's rewind.

when homestuck act 6 dropped, it released with one very important page.

this page.

this page, where someone with seemingly grey skin is typing on a keyboard. holy fuck, what a reveal. new troll. oh my god. this is the 13th troll

like, they have to be a troll, right? theyve got the time stuff. theyve got a symbol. theyve got shit going on with them

ah.

they were wearing gloves.

this? this is fucking huge.

in homestuck we see that shot a lot. of fingers on a keyboard. but every single time we have seen it, we have also seen at least one shot of the person typing, right?

with two exceptions. one is callie in the act 6 reveal.

and the other is andrew.

er, sorry.

"andrew."

from the patreon post on A Threat Sensed:

those are fake hands. what. what . what. what.

so

if this comic has a history of having a reveal when it comes to characters where Only Their Hands are being shown

and gloves are canon to homestuck, and have been used to precipitate this reveal

then perhaps

gloves are canon here as well.

if you'll allow me to speculate. on the gloves are canon in question.

yeah of fucking course rose is pretending to be hussie because WHO ELSE WOULD IT BE adjKFJGSKDHdskjgjkfskjgdsf

ITS ROSE!!! IT WAS ROSE THE WHOLE TIME

LETS REREAD.

"is that why you were lying on the floor" a question that Rose had because she saw his ass lying on the floor!!!!!!!

MY DAUGHTER

MY DAUGHTER YIFFANY LONGSTOCKING LALONDE HARLEY

hm purple background. anyway im sure thats fine

hm. hm. hm. psychoanalysis. hmmm. hm.

now if i was rose

if i was ultrose. and i wanted an ultimate weapon against dirk.

if i wanted to Make A Weapon Against Dirk.

what would i do.

how would i create it.

who would i hurt in the process.

anyway. this is all leading up to part 3 of this fucking nightmare roller coaster. but uh. basically. i think this one is like all but confirmed????

like...

We’ve had quite a bit of speculation on whether this is “really” Andrew. To that, I think we’d say that it doesn’t “really” matter. If you’re asking are those Andrew’s actual hands, then no, of course not. Because those hands are fake hands that are on the computer screen.

this sounds like it's telling us no, it's not "really" andrew. and to look at the hands. and we KNOW from part 1 of this theory that rose is incredibly deceitful.

the delay in "andrew"'s response could have plausibly been rose slipping away into her little hidey hole, putting on the stupid fucking gloves, and only then typing.

andrew never confirms who he is. and i'll admit, some of the lines don't sound 100% like rose. but others do. others really, really do.

i like this theory because it makes rose and dirk's rivalry on deltrius interesting. it means she has legs up on him. he thinks he's talking to hussie, but he isn't. she has plans within plans. she's got shit she's cooking.

i like it because it contextualizes yiffy, too.

hm wow it sure seems like the candy timeline isnt actually all that sealed! it sure seems like theres something in there that is a corrosive paradox! something that affects both timelines!

something

or someone!!!!!!!!!!!!

anyway. yiffy is an ultdirk icbm created by rose . rose wore gloves. gloves are canon. that's my theory graaaaaaaaaahhh

part 3 coming soon :3

[bloobydabloob]

You doing good dude

[risestarkissomega]

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Stockboy's ad is for...Rupert Swaggart?!

I wonder what ol' Meat Sweats is up to? 🤔😒

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[hal9000fanboy]

born to be used (mspaint, 2024)