#me: *feels like shit* 'why must this happen'

[lame-cameoliob]

Kallus' motivations are so interesting

I just need to get these thoughts out so I’m throwing this ramble here:

Now, this may totally just be me thinking too much (fork found in kitchen) but I feel like when it comes to how we tend to think about Kallus’ characterization, the implications of Kallus’ experience on Onderon are very overlooked. 

So he goes to Onderon with “the boys”-- which, the term “the boys” has its own set of implications about how Kallus must have really cared for those troopers under his command but I digress– and on a patrol they’re attacked, yada yada, we all know the story. 

But Kallus becomes fully paralyzed. He doesn’t describe the extent of his paralyzation but given that he had to watch as his squad was “finished off one by one” it’s pretty fair to assume that he could not move whatsoever. The fear that any person would experience in that situation is completely indescribable, that is genuinely some shit straight out of a night terror. 

He is– as we know– spared (albeit we don’t get exact details (did the merc try to kill him but reinforcements arrived before he could? Did the merc think that Kallus was already dead? Secret 3rd option?)) and he makes a full physical recovery, but there is no way in hell that he is not coming out of that encounter with some crazy PTSD. 

There’s not a whole lot of info on Imperial mental health services but I don’t think it’s a longshot to assume that they are probably close to nonexistent.

So the empire now has… an ISB agent with field experience… with untreated PTSD… where said PTSDs inciting incident pertained to a Lasat… and they’re looking to make an example out of Lasan……….. Are you picking up what I'm putting down here…...?

If you aren’t; it is BY NO MEANS a wild assumption to say that the Empire– essentially– weaponized Kallus’ PTSD, given that he would be less likely to question the moral atrocities happening on Lasan since he was already biased against Lasat as a whole. 

Now, we don’t really have a solid grasp on what Kallus’ exact role in Lasan was since he’s  kiiiiinnnd of an unreliable narrator– I mean we’re given the line in Droids in Distress where he takes credit for giving orders during the siege, but Kallus routinely just runs his mf mouth whenever he’s throwing hands so it’s like…  that could either be the truth or a crazy exaggeration, we as viewers have literally no idea what’s going on there– but it goes without saying that Kallus is obviously not excused from his participation just because of (likely) untreated mental illness, but that is literally like the whole point of his character so like we all knew that

Now, after Lasan, Kallus does something really bizarre for an imperial to do; he accepts the borifle given to him through the Boosan Keerah, and even though he doesn’t know about the cultural significance of that, he still takes it upon himself to learn how to use this weapon. I think that literally any other imperial would have tossed that shit out on sight, so I think it does kind of imply that Kallus did have a good deal of respect for Lasat culture.

Now we can all recall how Kallus is so annoying and also batshit insane whenever he fights Zeb for the first season and a half of rebels, and ME THINKS that this is because he wants to prove to himself that if he were not paralyzed on Onderon, he could have saved the members of his squad. He had to sit by and watch them die, and I think that he just wants the vindication; now you may be thinking, But Emma, he beat the Lasat who gave him his borifle, why would he still be obsessing over this– say it with me now– he is mentally ill. No victory will ever be enough to prove this to himself. Point blank period. 

(edit:) He is for sure operating from a place of extreme predjudice and bias but I think it's worth noting that he’s not operating under the usual xenophobic imperial mindset that other species are automaticaly lesser than. (end edit) This weird obsession that he has in seasons 1 and 2 deels like it's mostly there because he wants to outwit and outfight Zeb (and the rest of the Ghost crew… but especially Zeb) (edit: Though it is 100% influenced by Xenophobia-- his mental illness and xenopobia DO coexist!!)

And after the Honorable Ones???? It’s literally never brought up again. He chills tf out so hard after that it is high key uncanny. And like, yes duh that is because– for writing purposes– that’s the beginning of his redemption and they want viewers to root for him as fulcrum, but it also implies that after finding common ground with Zeb, and understanding where he’s coming from and who Zeb is as a person, he realizes that he’s been CRASHING TF OUT for basically no reason. 

And he is SO QUICK to switch sides?? Like, he is fulcrum at least a decent time before the beginning of season three. The whole point is that the second he asks questions and delves deeper into what the Empires motivations are he is disgusted enough that he doesn’t just drop everything and disappear, no, he became a spy for the rebels because he wants to help. I feel like that just goes to show that, at his core, Kallus is a good person. A deeply confused, and hurt, and misguided person, but a good one. 

I dunno, this is just a really long winded way of saying that Kallus is the perfect example of an imperial pawn. Like the Empire is an incredibly effecient indoctrination machine that exploits people at every turn, especially their own soldiers, and I think that Kallus’ relationship with that indoctrination along with his own motivations is just super super interesting and I think about it literally all the time

[slut4hee]

Prize Possession

{Paring: Club Owner Jeong Yunho x Blk Stripper Fem! Reader

{Genre: pure dirty smut, strip club au, mafia au, a little angst, 18+ so (mdni).

{Synopsis: You’re just a small town girl, who’s never had it easy in life. That’s until you started working at the Sparkle City nightclub, where you meet Jeong Yunho one of the most richest and dangerous mafia bosses in the city.

{Warnings: explicit scenes, rough sex, unprotected sex, (wrap it, before you tap it), creampie, choking, big dick yunho!!backshots, missionary (with the silver chain hanging yup teehee), fingering, squirting, oral (f receiving), daddy kink, breeding dirty talk, pet names, Yunho is nasty nasty, mentions of murders, alcohol consumption, lmk if I missed anything bookies<33

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“FUCK YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT” You shouted at your good for nothing ex boyfriend. You had just caught him cheating in your shared bedroom, sleeping around with the bitch he clearly told you not to worry about. You should have seen this coming though, all the late nights in, the constant excuses on why he always smelled like another women’s perfume.

You were so over his all his bullshit, all the lies, and all the sleepless nights you cried yourself to sleep, you were truly done. Tears streamed down your face, as you tugged your heavy luggage down the steps of the apartment complex, but you weren’t crying of a broken heart, it was tears of exhaustion.

You were already so numb to the pain you’ve been through in your life, that something like cheating was so minor to you. The only thing running through your mind is where you would lay your head tonight, you were broke as fuck, only 200 to your name which was not enough to get you by for the remaining of the week.

“Fuck this shit, I can’t believe I let myself go through that shit for so long” You said to yourself, as you set on the curve of the road, laying out your options and contemplating what the hell you were going to do. You could check yourself into a motel for tonight, but that would only get you by for the night, plus that would take all you have.

You pulled out your phone, opening up your contact list and scrolling down, until you stopped at your best friend’s contact name. Your finger hovered over the screen, as you contemplated whether you should call her or not, you genuinely didn’t want to bother her but she was the only person you could call.

You didn’t have your parents, your mom died when you were only thirteen years old, and when that happened your father also lost himself, turning to alcohol and drugs. You finally said fuck it and dialed her number, and after three rings she picked up the call.

“What’s up girl, let me guess that motherfucker ain’t came home yet?” Your best friend Nini asked, you could tell she wasn’t home by the loud music playing in the back, she must be at work.

“Hey Ni girl, I just caught his bitch ass cheating on me, with the bitch from down the street” You sighed, disgusted with yourself to even call that pig your ex boyfriend.

“Noo, are you serious right now, with that hoe Makayla or whatever the fuck her name is” Nini said in disbelief, you shivered as you started to feel your body getting cold by the late night breeze, reminding yourself that you were currently homeless.

“So where are you now love bug?” Nini inquired, you bit your lip nervously, hesitant to tell her that you have no where to go, but Nini would never judge you so you just let her know straight up.

“Bitch I’m on the curve of the road right now, I don’t have nowhere to go Ni” You said, you were genuinely so embarrassed to tell your best friend that, feeling the tears starting to prick at your waterlines.

“Oh my god girl, why are you just hanging out by the side of the road this late at night, are you crazy? I tell you what, I’m gonna get you a ride to my spot and you can crash as long as you want okay?” Nini said, you fought back your tears before thanking her and telling her much you appreciated her, without Nini you don’t know where you would be right now.

Not long after the Uber had picked you up from your shitty little town, and brought you to Nini’s high rise apartment in the city. Nini was a stripper, so she could afford to live like this, you on the other hand was barely making it. Some parts of you thought about becoming a stripper, but you just weren’t that type of girl, no judgement though especially to your best friend. But honest truth, you couldn’t see yourself becoming a stripper.

Oh so you thought….

⋆˚࿔

Nini wasn’t going to be home until later on tonight, she was working a late night shift, so she just gave you the passcode to her apartment and told you to make yourself at home. Her apartment was so spacious and luxurious, you hope one day you could call a place like this your home as well.

You sat your stuff down as you settled in, it was a two bedroom apartment, so you obviously took the guest room. Your stomach growled, reminding you that you haven’t eaten a single thing, since this morning. You thought the least you could do is buy you and your bestie food, so you settled on ordering Chinese takeout.

It was around 2 in the morning when you finally heard the keypad buttons being pressed, indicating Nini was finally home. You were already lounging on the couch, so you greeted her when she came in.

“Hey girl, so good to see you boo, long day at work?” You stood up from the couch, walking over to her and embracing her in a tight hug. She returned your hug with a little snuggle in your neck, sighing exhaustingly.

“Yes girl, we were packed tonight, we have this deal on the weekends, where you can get a free lap dance if you drop a band tip” She said tiredly, spotting the takeout boxes and helping herself to it.

“I’m guessing you had a lot of request huh?” You said cheeky, winking at her playfully. She rolled her eyes at your childishness, stuffing her face like she hasn’t eaten in days.

“Not to bring it up again, but I can’t believe that little ass boy played you like that” She said muffled, the food still being stuffed in her mouth. You sighed and rolled your eyes, before plopping back down on the couch.

“Yeah girl same, but it’s whatever fuck him, I’m done playing with little boys like him, who claim they’re real men when they’re not. All I’m thinking about is finding another job” You said, you had recently quit your other job, because it just got too stressful for you.

“How about you come work with me at Sparkle City?” Nini said a little hesitantly, she’s brought it up to you before, but of course you shot her down, so of course she expected the same response.

You started to actually think real hard about it, I mean could it really be that bad, I mean your best does it so it couldn’t be that big of a deal.

“I don’t know about that Ni, I mean do I even meet the requirements, plus you know how I feel about putting my body on display” You said, and quickly apologizing after, you didn’t want it to sound like an insult but Nini never took offense she knew you didn’t mean any harm.

“Just think about it baby, you’ll be making hella bank like me, plus with a body like that you’ll for sure make a killing” Your best friend reassured you, she’s always hyping you up, when you start to feel insecure or belittle yourself. But she knew it was caused by trauma, you went through in your past.

“I tell you what, come with me to work tomorrow night, and just check the place out to see if it would be something you’re up for” She said understandably, you nodded before going back to thinking real hard about her offer, you honestly loved the idea of making tons of cash, and being able to take good care of yourself because you fucking deserved it.

⋆˚࿔

The day went by fast and it was time for Nini to go to work, you don’t know why you were so nervous, it’s not like you’ve never been to a strip club before. But you guess, it was because this was possibly going to be your new job now. You and Nini got ready, and headed to Sparkle City, one of the most famous nightclubs in the city.

When you walked inside the club, you were immediately hit with different fumes of smells, some smelling of weed, alcohol, sweat, and different scents of perfumes and colognes. The club was actually really nice, the lights dim with a shade of purple, and the vibes of the place gave off a vintage yet modern style.

“ I have to go get ready, I just got word that one of my regulars are here, aka the one who literally pays all my bills” She stuck her tongue out playfully at you, before disappearing in the back. You on the other hand, you made your way over to the bar, ordering a drink you could barely afford, and taking in the scenery of the place.

As you’re sipping on your drink, you couldn’t help but get the feeling someone’s staring at you. You turned around, to check your surroundings, and that’s when your eyes landed on him. A South Korean gentleman, tall and handsome with an aura that was so intimidating.

His gaze was intense yet, nonchalant as a little smirk was plastered across his face. You tried to look away but it’s like you were paralyzed, you couldn’t move a muscle. That’s when someone finally knocked you out of trance, another handsome gentleman, but not as handsome as Mr tall and mysterious.

“What’s a pretty girl like yourself, sitting here all alone by herself for?” The man inquired, taking a seat next to you.

“I’m just enjoying the vibes” You simply said, taking another sip of your drink. You don’t know why, but you found yourself looking back over at the tall gentleman’s direction, his gaze still on you, but this time his smirk was a lot more noticeable almost amusing as he raised an eyebrow at you.

The guy next to you offered to buy you a drink and of course you took the offer, I mean who were you to turn down free drinks. The whole time you kept stealing glances at the tall handsome man, even though he was accompanied by two beautiful women on his lap, his attention was solely focused on you.

Suddenly he whispered something to the two women in their ears, before they got up from his lap and dismissed themselves. His eyes never left yours, in fact it’s like he called you over without exchanging any words or gestures. You just found yourself getting up from your seat, and making your way over to his section, totally ignoring the other guy asking where are you going.

Now that you were up closer, you could finally make out just how fucking sexy he was, his sliver hair, and lips plump and pink. His eyes were so pretty and intriguing, and don’t even get you started on his style, dressed in all black paired with a whole bunch of jewelry, you could tell he was rich.

“What took you so long baby, kept staring at me but kept me waiting so long” His deep voice caused shivers to run down your spine, fuck this man was going to be the death of you already, and you didn’t even fucking know him.

“Correction sir, you were staring at me” You said, trying to sound confident but your voice wavered a bit, he was making you so nervous and imitated. He let out a little chuckle, and fuck was it the most attractive thing you’ve ever heard, you were ready to drop your panties then and there.

“You stared back sweetheart, I guess we’re both guilty” He said softly, smirking at you with that fucking look, god he’s so fine you thought, if it meant he came to this club all the time, then who’s the person you need to see to apply!

“Are you here all alone baby girl?” He suddenly asked, tilting his head to side, as he checked you out from head to toe, waiting for your answer. You bit your lip nervously, before answering his question.

“No, my friend strips here, I’m just tagging along” You simply said, subconsciously scooting closer to him. He noticed, and smiled before scooting himself closer as well, and at this point you’re almost in his lap.

“Who’s your friend? And I haven’t seen you around here before, are you thinking about working here as well?” He inquired, placing his hand on your thigh, just resting it there but to you it was setting you off, heat rushing to your cheeks and core. His hands were so big, you could imagine how they would feel wrapped your ne-

“Hmm?” He hummed, knocking you out of your dirty thoughts.

“Oh um, her name is Nini, and yes I’m thinking about stripping here” You said a little hesitantly, you didn’t really feel too great giving out your best friend’s name, and telling a complete sexy stranger your plans of applying to work here, but it’s like you were under some spell just by the look in his eyes.

“Mmm I see, first time stripper eh?” He said, voice so deep but smooth like butter. You raised your eyebrow at him, how did he know you never stripped before.

“And how would you know I’ve never stripped before, I could be a pro you know” You said matter of fact, he chuckled softly again, shaking his head at your cuteness. Of course he could tell you were a beginner, just be the way you looked so tense.

“I just can tell mama, definitely don’t know what you’re getting yourself into, are you sure you want to step into this lifestyle? It can get pretty dangerous in this territory” He leaned over to you and whispered those words in your ear. You felt a chill run down your spine, both from being turned on by his hot breath on your neck, and the meaning behind his words.

“I’m a big girl I can take it, thank you very much” You replied, trying to sound tough and confident as possible. He just smirked and chuckled at you, before getting up from the velvet couch.

“Then I hope to see your pretty face around here then, I could get used to that you know” He simply said, before sparing you one last look, as he disappeared somewhere in the club. You don’t know why, but his words laid heavy on your conscious, did he know something? Who was he? why did he seem so informed with everything?

The night came to an end, and you ended up putting in an application and getting interviewed by one of the staff members, he was another South Korean gentleman, long black silky hair, and fine fine. He told you that they would get back to you, after your background check comes back clean and that would decide if you get hired or not.

Two days had passed and you finally got a call back saying your background check came back clean, and you were hired. You were happy you got the job, but you were super nervous, you didn’t really know how to work the pole and you didn’t even know how everything’s supposed to work.

Luckily you had Nini, she’s been stripping since she was 19, and she’s definitely a pro. She has a pole in her room, so she allowed you to practice with it, and honestly you’ve always been a fast learner, so you learned the basics pretty quickly.

Friday night came fast, it was officially your first day as a dancer, and you were anxious as fuck. Nini was a good support system though, making sure you were okay, showing you around the locker room and laying down the important rules that applied to the dancers.

“So what color are you going to wear for your first session, red always looks good on you boo” Nini said, as she applied her makeup. You smiled at her, before holding up both the red and the pink to your naked body in the mirror, as you contemplated on what color you should wear.

You decided on red of course, it just brought out your skin tone, pretty smooth brown skin, in red lingerie. You couldn’t help but feel a little uncomfortable though, the outfit you were wearing was nothing but provocative, a thin little lace thong and a red corset top. You did look so good though, titties sitting up nicely in your top, and your plump ass on full display.

Finally it was your turn to go on stage, and you started to freak out a little. You swallowed your nerves down the best way you could, before making your way to the stage, your six inch heels clicking as you walked. You hoped that they would play a song that you knew, just to make it easier for you to move to the beat.

Luckily for you, they were playing The Party & The After Party by The Weekend, one of your favorite songs and something slow you could work with. As the song played, you got lost in the music, swaying your curvy hips as you rolled your body down the silver pole

You could feel all the attention on you and honestly it felt good, which was a feeling you didn’t expect to feel, money and praise being thrown at you, as you moved your ass left to right. Finally you looked out to the crowd, and that’s when you laid eyes on none other than the gentleman before.

He had the same exact piercing gaze, but this time it was different, his eyes were dark with lust, hunger, and curiosity. You played along as you kept eye contact with him, bending over on the pole, as you wiggled your ass nicely. He shifted in his seat, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down, and if you weren’t seeing things, he mumbled a curse under his breath.

Your dance came to an end, and your made your way backstage, where Nini and some the other girls complimented you on your first dance.

“Damn girl, if I was a man I’ll definitely be hard as a rock right now” one of the other strippers, Lala said. You giggled at her comment, and thanked her.

“No seriously, you did an amazing job sweets, even Mr Jeong came to watch your first performance” Nini said, you looked at her confused, and she snorted, she totally forgot to run that by you about who the boss is, literally the most important part.

“Oh shit, I totally forgot to tell you about who runs this place, so his name is Jeong Yunho, he’s the owner of Sparkle City, he’s also know as Black Demon. One of the most dangerous and feared men in the city” Nini said with no hesitation, meanwhile you’re about to have a panic attack, what do you mean you’re working for a mafia boss?!

You’ve heard of the name Black Demon, even back in your small city, you remember reading about all the possible murders, that are all supposed to link back to him. That brings you back to the night that gentleman said those words to you, and now you knew just what he meant.

“How does he look, is he some creepy old Italian guy, who walks with a cane” You said seriously, but all the others laughed at your remark.

“No silly, he’s actually pretty young and handsome, but he’s really tall, like tall tall and he’s Korean. Oh, and he has silver hair” Nini said nonchalantly, your eyes widened as you registered her words, the gentleman you met at the club the other night, was the owner of this nightclub and he’s in the fucking mafia.

You quickly pulled Nini to side, whispering shouting at her, about why she didn’t let you know beforehand that you were going to working under a criminal.

“You could have at least told me, what I was getting myself into girl, what if something was to happen here” You said, you weren’t really upset, just a little terrified of the possibility of danger here.

“I didn’t think you would mind, plus what type of people do you think run these types of places, CEOs and government workers?” She said sarcastically, you rolled your eyes at her scoffed.

“No, but maybe just regular people, not deadly killers like him, do you know how many people he’s had killed” you exclaimed a little to loud for Nini’s liking, she quickly grabbed you by the arm, shushing you and taking you somewhere more secluded.

“Fuck Y/n, you can’t just be saying shit like that here, you really gotta watch what comes out of your mouth around here. If that shit gets back to Mr Yunho, both of heads will be on a sliver platter” She said with all seriousness, no hint of playfulness in her tone. You felt an eerie chill run down your spine, as you nodded in agreement.

The rest of the night went by smoothly, you had two dances the whole night, and just from those two performances alone you made $500 In total, that would have took you two weeks to make at a regular 9-5, but with stripping you made it in just a day.

You could definitely get used to this lifestyle, continuous money showers raining down on you, all from that shaking a little ass, and popping a titty? It was simply so easy. You couldn’t lie and say you weren’t on edge the whole time though, the new found information you got from Nini, was all starting to make sense.

You actually took time, to really look around the place, and it was all so obvious. Men dressed in all black suits, with guns on their hips, and the rule of not being all to enter the boss’s office without permission. You could also tell drug deals goes on here, a bunch of corporate executives and CEO’s, disappearing into the secret room, only to come out looking high out their minds.

Finally your long shift ended, and your feet were killing you, you don’t how these girls around here lasted everyday wearing these tall ass heels. You gave the club their percentage, and took the rest for yourself. You threw back on your regular clothes, and waited for Nini, to get finished with her private session, she was one of the popular dancers, so she had a lot of rich ass regulars that always came and spent hella money for a private lap dance.

You decide to reward yourself with a nice little drink, the fruity alcoholic beverage hitting the spot after a long day of standing on your feet. As you’re enjoying your drink, you felt someone tap you on the shoulder, and that’s when you turned around and you were faced with the same man who interviewed for the job.

“Miss Y/n, the boss has requested your presence to his office” The man simply said, his stone cold expression giving you chills, your heart started to beat out of your chest, why did Mr Jeong want to see you? Were you in trouble? Are you going to die? Did someone overhear you and Nini’s conversation from earlier.

All those thoughts started to run through your head at once, as you nervously nodded your head, and stood from your seat following him into the back of the club. Your palms were so sweaty, and your legs wobbled slightly as you walked, were you about to die? He led you down a long vintage looking hallway, stopping two tall double doors.

“You may enter, boss is waiting for you inside” The man said, before turning away from you, and standing by the door like a statute. You assumed he was one of Yunho’s men. Your hands were shaky, as you hesitated to push the doors open, you didn’t know what you were about to face and it scared the living hell out of you.

Finally you pushd the doors open, and you were hit with a faint smell of an incense burning, his office was more like a lounge, vintage furnished and expensive chandeliers hanging from the ceilings. There was even a pole in the middle of the room, and not to mention, the big liquor cabinet, with tons of expensive glasses and brown liquor.

You made your way around the corner, and there he was, lounging on the couch as held one of the expensive looking glasses in his hand, half full of some type of brown liquor. He was clad in a black button down shirt, with some of buttons opened to see his chest, and black slacks that showed the outline of his skinny waist.

“Y-you wanted to see me sir?” You stuttered, barely managing to get your words out. He grinned softly, as he twirled the brown sustenance around in his cup.

“Would you like to have a drink with me” He said softly, gesturing you towards the spot next to him on the couch. You managed to walk over and take a seat next to him, your legs felt stiff, like they were going to give out on you any minute.

He grabbed you a glass off the table and poured bourbon whiskey inside of it. You’ve never had whiskey before, it was way too expensive to buy, but he had a whole case full of it.

“I hope you don’t mind taking whiskey, it’s the only thing I drink” He said, staring deep into your eyes as he handed you the drink.

“I’ve never had whiskey before, but all about trying new things” You said before, holding the glass up to your nose and smelling it. The scent was strong, and you could tell it was going to burn your throat, but being a pussy was not in your nature. Yunho watched you carefully the whole time, watching as you down the shot of whiskey.

And just how you imagined, the brown liquor burned the hell out of your throat, your eyes watering like hell. Yunho smirked at you in amusement, you were an intriguing little thing, taking a whiskey neat shot like a champ, he was so turned on by you.

You cleared your throat before breaking the silence, the room was starting to grow hot, the tension in the room was beginning to feel overwhelming.

“I didn’t know you owned this club” You said carefully, trying not to make full eye contact with him, his presence was so dangerous for you, his aura was addicting and you were eating it all up. You’ve never felt so weak for a man, like you do for Yunho, he makes you want to submit to him, makes you want to serve him like he’s your master.

“You seemed like a smart girl, thought you would’ve been able to read between lines bunny” He said, voice husky and slightly raspy from drinking the whiskey, you fought to keep your composure, your things starting to rub together at the nicknames he was giving you.

You swallowed your hard, not trusting your own voice to say another word, you just looked around timidly, waiting to see what his motive was. And that’s when he said that…

“Dance for me” He suddenly said, staring at you with an unreadable expression, your eyes widened as you stared back at him in shock. Did he really just ask you to dance for him?

“Y-you want me to dance for you?” You repeated, starting to squirm nervously in your seat. He simply nodded, biting his bottom lip, as he laid his back against the couch, relaxing his shoulders. You sat there in silence at first, trying to process everything at once, it’s not like you could tell him no, Could you tell him no? You thought to yourself as you pondered and pondered.

“I want you to repeat the same dance you did earlier, but this time can we make it a little bit more interesting shall we?” He smirked, taking another shot of whiskey, you could tell he was tipsy by the way his pupils were now blown out and glassy.

“Make it interesting how?” You inquired, anxiously fiddling with your fingers. He grabbed a small black remote, dimming the lights of the room changing it to the same shade of red like you had for your stage dance.

“Do it naked, just for me” He replied, you almost choked on your own spit, he wants you to dance naked for him, is he out of his mind?!

“I don’t think that’s appropriate sir, I can’t” You said, yes he was fine and yes he was a mafia leader, but you still had respect for yourself, or so you thought…

“You know baby, I don’t usually take to the dancers that work at my club, but you baby, you been driving me insane since I first laid eyes on you” He said, you do remember Nini telling you that Yunho never slept or interacted sexually with any of them, of course there were plenty of the girls who threw themselves at him, but he always turned them down.

“You’re telling me I’m special huh” You said, starting to feel less nervous and anxious because of his intriguing words.

“Yes, indeed you are baby girl, now be a good girl and get up there and dance for me” He smirked, as he poured himself another drink, waiting patiently for you to follow his orders. You got up from the couch, and made your way over to the pole. Yunho stared shamelessly at your ass, as it jiggled when you walked.

He pressed play on the music, and the beat of the song came through the speakers of the lounge. You started to slowly strip out of your clothes, luckily your regular clothes consisted of a pair of booty shorts and a lace crop top. You turned around and bent over, your ass facing him as you slowly eased out of your thong.

Yunho let out a quiet groan, shifting around in his seat, as he adjusted his legs. You could tell the effect you had on him, boy were you letting it go over your head, you swayed and rolled your body just like you did on stage, Yunho was watching so intently, taking another sip from his drink, as he enjoyed your dirty dancing.

You swirled around the pole, doing the tricks that Nini taught you, and then you hopped off the pole and made your way over to him. You stood right in front of him, as you shake your ass and danced provocatively. He spread his legs, and you took the hint now giving him a lap dance as you grind and twerk your ass in his lap.

You could feel how hard he was, cock straining painful through his slacks, begging for some sort of relief. As much as you loved and respected him for just watching and enjoying without touching, you wanted him to touch you, to feel his big strong hands on your body.

“Mmm touch me baby” You said, your pussy now leaking onto his slacks, you were so turned on from this, and so was he. He bit his lip harshly, before going to rub on your ass and waist, you were such a sinful sight.

“God fucking damnit, you’re making it difficult to resist you right now baby” He groaned, squeezing your asscheeks and spreading them apart to look at your wet glistening folds. You moaned softly, as he spread your pussy lips apart, to see how tight and small your hole is.

“Then don’t resist sir, take me please” You begged shamelessly, Yunho could feel his cock twitching in the confines of his boxers, it was not like him to fuck one of his dancers, but you weren’t just a dancer to him, you were the women he’s been searching for all along, he was so weak in the knees for you.

“Do you know what you’re asking for bunny, and who you are dealing with?” He hissed in pleasure, you full on dry humping him now, the friction from his clothed cock, turning you on to the max.

“I don’t care how dangerous you are, I don’t care that you are bad for me, I just w-wan you now” You whined, feeling yourself getting shamelessly close to your high, you were about to get off by dry humping him, it felt too fucking good to stop now. He halted your movements, and you let out a desperate whine, you thought he was rejecting you until he suddenly manhandled you into the couch.

“Fuck I can’t hold back anymore, can’t resist such a pretty little fucking slut like you darling, such a nasty little thing, about to make a mess all over my pants with that wet pussy” He groaned, spreading your asscheeks, before spitting directly on your pussy, and licking a strip of your pussy.

Your back arched, as you gripped the edges of the couch, the feeling of his wet long tongue was like no other, it’s been so long since you’ve had your pussy eaten, and Yunho just happened to be a fucking pro at it!

“Oh fuck, oh fuck please right there” You moaned shamelessly, he sucked and licked on your sensitive bundle of nerves. Your whole body was trembling with pleasure, as you looked back at see his face buried beneath your asscheeks.

“Fuck mama, pussy taste so damn good, shit could eat your up all night” He said muffled, now tongue fucking your tight little hole, like it was his cock. You let out a pathetic scream, the band in your stomach threatening to snap any minute now, you couldn’t believe how fast he was about to make you come undone on his face.

“You gonna come on my face pretty thing, that’s right make a fucking mess on daddy’s face” He growled, sliding one of his digits inside your tight cunt. Your pussy clenched violently around his finger, you could feel this hot tingling feeling in your lower abdomen, you’ve never felt this feeling before and you knew you were about to cum so hard.

“Daddy! Oh my god I’m cumming” You whined loudly, the knot in your stomach finally coming unraveled, as you squirted your essence all over his face. Your legs were trembling, you were panting like crazy, and you felt so embarrassed squirting all over his face like that.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t know I was going to squirt” you said weakly, you were already so fucked out, but you guys were far from being done, you needed his big cock inside your greedy pussy.

“No don’t apologize for being a good girl for daddy, that was so fucking hot” He groaned, standing up from his knees, as he started to unbuckle his pants, dropping down to his ankles. The outline of his cock in his boxers was huge, you were definitely intimidated by his size but also so fucking turned on by it.

“Gonna let me fuck this tight pussy raw baby?” He grunted, freeing himself of out of the confines of his boxers, as his dick spring free, the top flushed red and leaking precum. You looked back at him and nodded eagerly, wiggling your ass to entice him. He groaned loudly, before rubbing his tip against your wet folds.

“Baby p-please, stick it in, need your cock so badly” You pleaded, wanting nothing more than to feel his thick cock, rearranging your guts. He smacked your asscheek, and you yelped at the sting of it. Finally after what seemed like eternity, you felt his mushroom tip nudging your tight hole, your little pussy struggling to accommodate his massive size.

“Oh shit! Oh my god wait, too fucking big” You whined, pushing back at his stomach for him to give you a minute. He chuckled softly in amusement, landing a harsh smack to your asscheek, as he rubbed soothing circles on the same spot.

“You can take it bunny, remember your words, you’re big girl you can take it” He cooed, pushed your face into the couch, as he started to push his length inside your fluttering walls. The stretch was intense, it felt you were being split in half, if it wasn’t for how wet your pussy was, it would have been impossible to fit.

After a couple more pushes he was fully nestled inside you, standing still to let you adjust to his size, and you could feel his throbbing cock pulsating. He let out a deep groan, trying to hold himself back, from fucking into you roughly.

“Fuuuckk, this pussy so tight and warm, shit tell me when to move baby girl” He hissed, as your pussy clenched snugly around his length. Eventually the pain started to turn into pleasure, and you were ready for him to ruin you.

“You can move now daddy” You moaned, pushing your ass against his pelvis, wanting to feel him as deep as possible. He pulled almost out of your wet pussy, until he slammed back in, knocking the wind out of your lungs.

“Hnmphhhh, Ohh my god Yunho, your cock so fucking good” You moaned loudly, gripping onto the couch for dear life, as he starts to fuck into you. Yunho eyes rolled to back of his head, your pussy felt incredible around his cock, all tight and warm.

“Look at you, such a good fucking girl, taking my cock like a good little whore” He growled, setting a brutal pace, as he starts to beat your pussy in. The sounds of skin slapping echoed throughout the room, and you’re pretty sure his bodyguard could hear you getting your guts rearranged.

“Yes daddy, I’m your good little whore” You screamed out, as Yunho pulled you by the hair, forcing your body to lay flushed to his chest, as he pounds relentlessly into your weeping cunt.

“That’s right all fucking mines, nobody can fucking have you, you belong to me now understood?” He spat, as he manhandled your body to a different position, somehow not sliding out of you. You were now laying on your back, face to face with him, ad he hovered on top of you.

He barely gave you time to breathe, as starting to pound into you again. Your eye rolled to back of your head, and you screamed In silence, he was fucking the shit out of you, all you could do was lay there and take it like the good whore you are.

“Yunho! S-slow down, I’m going to cum again fuck” You whined, that same tingling feeling returning, as you neared your high for the 2nd time tonight. The sight of Yunho tall frame above your small one, rocking his hips back and forth, as his silver diamond chain dangled over your face.

“Fuck baby I’m not gonna last any longer, I wanna breed this pussy, stuff you full of my babies and ruin you for anyone who tried to take what’s mines” He said, you could barely hear what he was saying, your mind was in another dimension as he fucked you into an oblivion.

Like clockwork, he hit your pressure point, that spot inside you that makes everything feel fuzzy. Your legs were shaking violently, as he slammed into your g-spot over and over, and finally you felt the band snap in your stomach snap. You came hard around his dick, squirting and creaming like crazy.

He followed shorty after, letting out a guttural groan, as he emptied out his once full balls inside your spent cunt. His big body collapsed on the side of you, the both of you panting heavily, and trying to catch each other’s breath.

You could feel his cum oozing out of your abused hole, the feeling was so uncomfortable in the worst way. He got up from the couch, disappearing into the bathroom, and coming out with a box of tissues. You laid there weak, as you watched him wipe the remnants of his cum, that oozed out on your thighs and legs.

Your heart skipped a beat at that, normally you never received aftercare, not even your ex boyfriend took the time to do this for you. You couldn’t believe a stone cold killer like Yunho, was being sweet to you like this, you were whipped.

Finally he broke the silence, grabbed you by your waist and pulling you closer to him.

“I hope you didn’t think I was playing with you baby, you really belong to me now “ He said seriously, rubbing soothing circles on your back. You smiled like an idiot, snuggling your face into his neck.

“Good because I’m not going anywhere, I’m yours” You simply said, pecking him on his cheek, he locked eyes with you, and this time it wasn’t that unreadable stone cold expression. It was replaced with something more softer, love and warmth.

You knew what you were getting yourself into falling for a man like Jeong Yunho, but you didn’t care, you were in love with a criminal with no shame.

“𝐈 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰, 𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐬 𝐉𝐞𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐘𝐮𝐧𝐡𝐨” 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐝.

“𝐆𝐞𝐭 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐢𝐭 𝐛𝐮𝐧𝐧𝐲, 𝐈’𝐦 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐟𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐬��𝐞𝐝 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐲𝐞𝐭” 𝐇𝐞 𝐜𝐡𝐮𝐜𝐤𝐥𝐞𝐝.

The End…

A/n: Someone pass me a cigarette real quick 🚬 😩 this is so toe curling, pussy popping good!!! I been wanting to release a fic about Yunho for so long and I finally did it😛 we cheered! Ladies and gentlemen I’m afraid this is a nasty one be prepared to change your sheets🫦 not proofreading shii🫶🏽

—————————————————————————

Taglist:

@i03jae @ataver @ancnymcnzjy @kolawnk

[klunkcat]

50 VAGUE ANGSTY + HURT/COMFORT DIALOGUE PROMPTS

42. "Tell me what I did wrong! What's wrong with me?!" + rise A Team 🥺

You keep requesting things that I know will hurt ur feelings!!!

TW: panic attack, derealization/dissociation

Waking up in the med bay had been less painful than this. He’d broken fourteen bones and fractured three more, been coughing up blood and some thick substance he was very sure was never supposed to be on the outside but he’d thought, ‘hey, we won’. 

This didn’t feel like winning. This felt like standing on the other side of a very long tunnel and seeing the world from a sideways tilt. 

He’d been allowed out of the med bay for a glorious two days– mostly to lay up on the couch instead of the stiff medical room— and missed somewhere that the world had actually ended. Because when Raph leaned over him to grab his glass of water on the table beside him, Leo flinched. 

It wasn’t him, he decided. Because Leo had never once in his life feared anything from his big brother, not even when Raph had gone through his snapping phase. Because Raph was Raph and that meant the biggest warmest hugs you could imagine, and big wet watering eyes and crying over commercials with kittens that sneezed too hard. It couldn’t be him that saw Raph moving forward and thought of pink, slimy tendrils, and felt his airways closing with a sharp thrum of oh god and I’m going to die, because that didn’t make sense. 

Raph froze, eyes wide. Leo fell further outside himself. 

The other him made his hand move, he didn’t feel it move. The other him spoke. 

“Oh, ha. Sorry, static must have shocked me.” From the blankets, yeah. That made sense. This other him that jumped at things at least had his wits, that was reassuring. 

“Leo,” Raph said very slowly. Some hindbrain red alert crawled all the way up from his heart and right out his mouth, and into that other version of him that was staying very still. 

“I didn’t— I didn’t mean to.” 

Raph put his arm down just as slowly, leaned back like he could telegraph every moment. His eyes stayed wide and locked on to him. “Okay, that’s okay.” 

“It wasn’t you,” the other him said, and Leo couldn’t feel his lips moving but he desperately wanted to be able to shut him up. “It wasn’t um— just. Jumpy. Pulled something funny, you know with the. The bandages.” 

Shit, Leo thought. Stick to the script, pal. 

“Right,” Raph said, without blinking. Like he was thinking something else. 

“Don’t do that,” other him said. “Okay, the big brother voice thing. I don’t need it, let’s just. Watch the movie, right?” 

He was suddenly aware of Donnie by his kneecaps, Mikey staring at him from the mound of pillows he’d made at Don’s legs. He needed this other him to shape up, acting classes were a must. He was flubbing big time, Leo did not flub. 

Raph shifted again, molasses slow, and gave Donnie a look. His twins face twitched with a nod, and he summarily picked up Mikey, blanket and all and shuffled into his lab. Traitor, Leo thought vaguely. Pincer attack, coordinated front. He hated that. That was his and Don’s thing.

Stepping on my turf, he meant to say. Other Leo’s mouth didn’t move, so he was useless. 

“Actually, Raph’s a little worried.” 

Oh, Leo thought, oh no. Fear lanced through him again, in some distant way. He could see his fingers twitching and couldn’t make them stop. “Worried? About what. Can I help, big guy?” 

Raph hummed. “Think you could, yeah. We haven’t talked about everything that happened, have we?” 

Well, Mikey had made him talk a little, about why he thought it would be okay to choose himself without telling anyone else first. Hugged him as tightly as he could with Leo’s broken ribs for three solid hours until Leo’d given in and promised he’d be kinder to himself. Donnie had been furious at him for three straight days somewhere after he’d blearily woken up from his coma, but they hadn’t talked directly about why yet. Suddenly, the look he’d caught clicks.

He was still too outside himself to react the right way. Other Leo looked away and twisted the blanket in his hands. 

Ever so slowly, he felt Raph’s warm hand land on his knee. He could see it, his big brother’s hand, green and normal. No spikes, no pink. He could breathe out— there was a rope somewhere there that guides him closer enough that he can flip his own hand around and squeeze. 

“Nothing to talk about, bro bro,” Leo managed, but it was croaky and lacking all the usual fizz. Fizzless, him. The horror was nearly too much to think about. 

The look Raph gave him was half a wince of apology, half tangled up exasperation. He didn’t like that there was guilt there. That didn’t fit. Raph hadn’t done a single thing wrong. 

“Leo.” 

He made himself swallow. “Raphala.” 

Raph sighed. Flipped Leo’s hand over so he could stare down at the bandages crossing his palm. He’d burnt the inside of his fingers somehow, he couldn’t even say when it happened. Silly, really. He’d laughed when Don had told him. Come to think of it, Dee hadn’t really looked like he’d agreed with the joke then either. 

He watched the way Raph traced his thumb across the white gauze, the way his face twisted and crashed down with mounting horror. 

“I’m so sorry, Leo. You know I love you, right?”

Other Leo made a second appearance, making his hands go numb. “I— of course? I love you too, what does that—?”

Raph’s non bandaged eye blazed when he looked up at him, swimming in the dim movie light. “I hurt you, Leo. I took your trust and I hurt you with it. Raphie’s so sorry.” 

That didn’t— Leo blinked rapidly. The world fell out of focus, clicked free of its puzzle piece board. Out into the ether. “Stop apologizing.” 

“Leo—”

“No!” Other him said it sharp, loud. Too electric behind the words, he winced at himself and didn’t feel his face move. “You don’t— you don’t get to apologize to me. That doesn’t— what are you talking about Raph?” 

Somehow his brother’s face only fell further, it made the panic in Leo’s chest sticky. “I said that wrong, I don’t—” It was so hard to think, why couldn’t he make himself think? “I’m not afraid of you! I’m not.” He wasn’t. Because it was Raph. 

“It’s okay if you are, buddy. Raph understands—” 

“I’m not!” Leo bit out, and blinked rapidly again as the world falls further out to sea. “I put you in danger, I jumped in and— I did something stupid, and you got brainwashed. Because I fucked up. Why aren’t you mad at me? Tell me what I did wrong!”

What’s wrong with me, he thought, vibrant and liquid like toxic sludge seeping down to his core. 

He couldn’t even see right anymore, everything had gone shapes and colors. It wasn’t even Raph in front of him, it was something. It was nothing and— 

“--breathe with me, okay? In. Out, that’s it. That’s perfect, Bug, keep doing that.” 

The Bug snapped him together, pulls all of his strings forward. Raph hadn’t called him that since they were toddlers, when he and Donnie had started insisting being twins and Raph tried to play along. Bug and Boo, he’d said all proud. Donnie had hated it instantly and rebuked any attempt at being called something so sweet by biting. Leo’d tried to make it fit a little better, since Raph seemed to like it so much.

‘S it b’cause I bug you?’ Leo’d said, sad and puddling up but hiding it with a teasing smile he knew would make the hurting less loud. 

Raph had smoothed his hand across his head and grinned. ‘It’s cause you’re my favorite bug.’ But it sounded like a good thing when Raph said it. 

Leo forced in a breath, feels his hands become his hands and his toes firmly plant as his toes. “Sorry,” he managed. “Sorry, went. Um. Somewhere. Back.” 

Raph’s big worried eye peered down at him, he let go of Leo’s hand with a firm squeeze. Leo shook his head, clearing out all the fuzz as much as he could. 

“I need you to hear me, just for a second. You didn’t do anything wrong,” Raph tried, worry making his voice small. “Can you believe me on that one thing? You were brave, and you got us through it, and most importantly you got Leo through it. I’m not mad.”

Leo scoffed, staring down at the blanket instead. Raph carefully scrubs a hand across the top of Leo’s head, warm and calloused the way he knows. 

“Raph wanted you safe. That’s all. And I hurt you, so it’s okay if you— if you need time.” 

Leo snapped his eyes up, grabbing at Raph’s hand again even before he pulled away. “I don’t! I don’t need you to go anywhere, or leave or. Please don’t leave.” 

Raph’s face gentled. 

“Can we just,” Leo couldn’t look at him, he couldn’t. “Can we just stay here for a minute? Maybe talking can be later.” When it wasn’t him and other him preferably, so he could say things the right way.

“Okay.” 

Raph settled back on the couch, slowly lifting his arm free and telegraphing the space underneath for Leo to decide. As if he needed to decide, the best place in the world was in Raph’s hugs. He’d always fit perfect there. 

Raph smoothed his hand across Leo’s head with his thumb, back and forth.The warmth pulled him all the way back into himself, almost with a shudder. Leo squeezed his eyes shut and buried his snout further into Raph’s side. It made him brave. “I’m not scared of you. I’ve never been scared of you, big guy.”

Raph’s thumb paused. Smoothed back again. “It’s okay if you are. That was… pretty scary.” 

Leo shook his head stubbornly. “Wasn’t you. I know my big brother anywhere. That wasn’t him.” 

He pretended kindly not to hear the hitch in Raph’s breathing. The warm chuckle after is like lottery gold. 

“Thanks, bug. I know you, too.” 

[slut4christopherr]

—GHOSTFACE— 👻

MATTHEW STURNIOLO

pics by : @sturnlsstuff

warnings: unprotected p in v(don’t do this!!!), riding, cumming, aftercare, smuttt, pussy eating

(if i missed any please lmk!!)

summary: matt sneaks into your room at night, wearing a ghost face costume from the horror/gore movie ‘scream’

what happens will make you wet.

a/n: ive only just started writing, so anything i need to improve please lmk and also comment if you wanna be added onto my taglist! i’m tagging my moots atm 😞 i hope you guys enjoy! this is a 1 part story‼️

you talking = white

matt talking = blue

as i finish the food i just made, i place my plate into the dishwasher and close the door, the audio from the tiktok i’d left playing.

“so you got a boyfriend?”

“why? you wanna ask me out on a date”

“maybe? so, do you have a boyfriend?”

i pick the phone back up, seeing matt sturniolo, the guy who adores eating my pussy, getting edited with clips of ghost face.

i couldn’t lie, it did turn me on.

i clicked the repost button and set my phone down on the couch.

i walked into my bedroom. swearing id shut the door as it was open a little bit but i’d must of imagine shutting it

i turn on the LED’s that wrap around my walls, to a red colour

as i’m about to get in bed, i scream as i feel a pair of cold, large hands wrap around my waist

“shh ma, don’t need t’be screamin’ jus’ yet”

i recognised the voice almost immediately

“matt. i told you to stop sneaking into my fucking house!”

matt chuckles as i turn around, he holds a voice changer upto his mouth through the mask, speaking into it, his voice came out all static and raspy

“and i said i don’t care, ma, so whatcha gon’ do? hm”

the way his voice came out from that stupid little box made my legs feel weaker and weaker every word he said

“and also, why the fuck you wearin’ that? take it off.”

he points at my t-shirt, his hands grip my shoulders ever so slightly and move me back toward my mattress, i flip down onto my back as he grips the hem of the t-shirt and rips it over my head.

i go to grab his mask and pull it up and over his head and throw it across the room, the black cape over him and his jawline, making him look so good in the dim red lighting of my LED’s

his eyes darken as he focuses on my breasts, one cold hand going to cup one into it.

he rolls my hard nipple around between his thumb&pointer finger which makes me let out a quiet moan

“mmm, i fuckin’ love the sounds you make for me ma”

his pants grow tighter by the minute and he groans and slaps my tit, making me squeal.

he gets onto his knees on the wooden floor, gripping my thighs and pulling me towards the end of the bed.

i look down at him as he looks up at me with hunger written all over him

his fingers hook into my shorts and panties, as he looks up at me again, asking for permission

i nod quickly and he pulls them down at a very, very slow pace

“matt, please.. please..”

you aren’t looking at him but you can tell he has that shit eating grin on his face

“use your words ma, what do you want?”

i let out a shaky sigh

“please matt, finger me”

matt slaps my thigh as he lets my shorts & panties pool at my ankles

he rubs a finger up my slit, groaning at how wet i already am

“m-matt, stop teasin’ baby”

he takes a deep breath before diving into my slick folds, his tongue diving into my head as his perfect nose applies pressure onto my sensitive clit

i let out a moan

“mmm fuck-fuck don’t stop!”

matt doesn’t stop, all that can be heard is my moans, his groans and the slurping sound of my pussy being eaten by a man who looks like he hasn’t eaten in days

i felt a knot form in my stomach

“matt i’m gon- oh fuck- i’m-“

my words get cut off my the knot snapping as he laps my clit with his tongue, making my hips buck into his face, pushing him deeper into my heat

5 mins later…

i bounce up and down on matts large, hard cock, i used the precum as lubricant, knowing you didn’t need to use it as my pussy was literally dripping wet.

matts slender fingers dug into my skin, making sure to leave bruises

the only sounds heard is the hum of the cars driving outside, skin against skin slapping and both of our moans

“mmm- ma, m’so close”

my pussy clenches around him in response as he grips my waist and pulls me down harder onto to him

i moan as the knot in my stomach snaps for the 2nd time, my juices running down matts cock.

i feel his balls tense and his cock twitch then, hot strings of white cum colour my walls

we stay like this for a minute, catching our breath until he pulls me off of him and gently puts me on the bed and stands up, walking to the bathroom to grab a damp cloth to clean me up

“your still not allowed to sneak into my house matt”

he grins in response

“yeah? sure ma”

a/n: tysm for reading! and this was so so rushed 😭 any ideas leave them in the comments

with lots of love and big tits - mia!

taglist: @sturnshood @sturniololuv08 @sturniolosweets-deactivated2025 @sturniolospumpkin @chr1sslvtt @christmastreecake @chrisprettybaby @chrissturniolodailysluts @chrisweetheart @mattscoquette @mattsmedusa @mattsstarlet @mattybsgroupie @sturnsrecord @mattsobvimyfav

[crime-scene-psychic]

I honestly think that the Nolan Batman trilogy was the best and worst thing to happen to the Batman franchise, because on one hand, it was the first live-action instance of trying to make Batman more gritty and serious (because while the Keaton, Kilmer, Clooney movies took the story much more seriously than the 60s television show, they were still goofy at times, which is why I honestly think they're the best rendition of Batman, because they were able to balance silliness with seriousness, which is what Batman is all about, but that's obviously an entirely different thesis) which then allowed for more people to take comic book movies serious, consequently leading to the rise of the DCEU and, obviously, the MCU (we would not have the MCU today and the actual good movies that came out of it without Nolan's trilogy, there's simply no argument there).

However, the Nolan trilogy also unfortunately made "dark, gritty Batman" the norm, meaning that once anyone tries to actually have some fun with Batman, they immediately get shit on by comic book dude bros. It also created the most annoying characterization of the Joker that everyone has been trying to replicate since and no one will be able to replicate, because they simply do not understand the character (I honest to God think the closest live-action actor who has ever made a Joker character work besider Heath Ledger was Cameron Monaghan in the Gotham television show, and he wasn't even really Joker??? but at least he didn't make it everyone else's problem and was a good mix of goofy and psychotic, not just psychotic) and will never be Heath Ledger (but they don't stop trying much to my forever annoyment).

And while I can recognize the cultural and significant impact on the comic and film community that Nolan's trilogy had, it is still by far my least favorite adaptation because of how serious it takes itself (and of course, the racism. The racism is actually the bigger one for me. Fuck Christopher Nolan for that. Ra's al Ghul is NOT a white man just because you want a plot twist, and you CANNOT just erase Bane being mixed race because you fucking FEEL LIKE IT because him being mixed race is extremely relevant to his origin). Batman has had serious moments in the comics, don't get me wrong, and I know things must evolve and change over time and that I cannot expect an 80 year old character to not be further developed throughout the decades, but it almost feels as if Nolan and Goyer (the writer) read a Sparks Notes version of the history of Batman, cracked their knuckles, and said "yeah, I think I got it."

Spoiler alert: they did not get it.

When I watch the Nolan trilogy (which I haven't in quite some time and I really don't want to, even to prove a point to people on the Internet) I notice how uninspired it feels, story-wise. While the action and cinematography is excellent, the story is lacking for me, and when you're telling a story like Batman, that has decades of content, you cannot just forgo storytelling for cool special effects.

I'd much rather watch a Batman adaptation that has the shittiest effects known to man with a writer who whole-heartily cares for the characters they're writing and has taken time to research. And that's honestly one of the biggest problems the comic book film industry is having now, both DC and Marvel. They're not hiring people who actually care about these characters to write them and they're focusing much more at appealing to everyone they can instead of who the movies should be made for: fans.

You're gonna have such a harder time convincing my mom, a woman who only cares about Wonder Woman, to watch the new Captain America film than you would someone who has read the Sam Wilson Cap comic run. And while this entire issue stems from the fact that the film industry is just that, an industry, and has become less about filmmakers making art and more-so how much money investors and producers can get out of ticket sales, it is still infuriating to see franchises you care deeply about be ruined by guys just there to cash their paychecks and be done with it.

And really, the film industry as we know it needs to be fucking demolished from the inside out, but that will never happen and now we're a bit off-topic. So, back to Batman.

I think another issue I have with newer live-action Batman adaptations is that they choose to forgo a VERY IMPORTANT character when it comes to Batman/Bruce Wayne's evolution as a character and story line.

Robin.

Since whatever the fuck the casting of Chris O'Donnell in 1995 was (why was he, like, a grown man?), people have been afraid to touch a live-action Dick Grayson with a six-foot pole (besides Titans, which I'm gonna get to in a sec). Which is ridiculous, because he is, like I said, an insanely important character when it comes to showing the growth Bruce Wayne goes through.

Bruce Wayne becomes Batman because he is so angry about his parent's deaths and the corruption of Gotham that he doesn't know what else to do. All the money in the world cannot change things for the better, his own father tried and died for his troubles, and he is left with no other option. Bruce Wayne works during the day to fight corruption via charity and his company, Batman works during the night and is able to do what Bruce Wayne can't (beating the shit out of people, mainly). The two are separate sides of the same coin.

And despite this seeming like a good arrangement, it's pretty obvious in most adaptations (at least they get THAT right) that beating the shit out of people in back alleys is not a good replacement for therapy. You're able to see the toll being Batman has on Bruce. He quickly becomes more occupied with being a vigilante than being himself. Bruce needs something to break through this internal struggle and help him balance both lives.

And so a boy named Dick Grayson comes along.

Dick's so important (and so are the other Robins, of course, but Dick being the first means I have to talk about him a bit more) because he forced Bruce to get his shit together. Here's a boy who's about the same age Bruce was when his parents died, who also just saw his parents killed in front of him, and is so full of rage he has no idea what to do. Sounds familiar...

Bruce is able to help himself by helping Dick. He gives him an outlet to vent his anger and frustrations while also looking out for him in the best way he can. While there are many issues with how Robin comes to be in various comic runs (and if this was real life it would be fucking ridiculous) Dick becoming Robin is extremely important. If he hadn't been taken in by Bruce Wayne, if he'd been allowed to let that anger continue to bubble up inside of him, he probably would have killed Tony Zucco and that would have been enough to set Dick down a terrible path he might not recover from.

The same goes for Bruce. If he were to set out and kill the person who shot his parents, he wouldn't be a hero anymore because that single event would shatter the entire point of Batman, which is that he is not meant to decide who lives and dies. If he were, how would he be any different than all the villains in Gotham that he fights as Batman? How would he be better than the corrupt businessman and politicians that he has to battle as Bruce Wayne? He wouldn't.

Batman needs Robin and Robin needs Batman, because they are yin and yang. Light within darkness, darkness within light. You cannot separate these characters and still tell an accurate story, it's impossible. I think that's a huge issue Nolan's movies have, on top of many others. You cannot accurately present to me a Batman story if there is no Robin, just as you couldn't give me a Robin story without Batman.

Every Robin is so important to how Bruce Wayne as a character is developed, and disregarding this as a creator is not only disrespectful to the character, it misses the entire point. I refuse to take your adaptation of Batman seriously if you can't figure out how important Robin is. He isn't just some kid sidekick, he isn't an optional side character, he is what makes Batman human. You cannot have gritty, Neo-noir Batman and forgo Robin just because you see him as the sidekick in tights. When Batman was silly and took itself less seriously, sure, there wasn't a lot to Robin nor Batman's troubling pasts. But now that you want to deep dive into Bruce Wayne's psyche and pick apart what makes him the way he is you wanna throw in the towel and erase the part that humanizes him? Fuck. You.

You can't make a complex Bruce Wayne and take away parts that help audiences understand his complexities, that's fucking STUPID!

Titans, for all its faults and problems, will always have my gratitude as it had the fucking balls to give, without a doubt, the best and most rounded live-action adaptation of Dick Grayson we have ever seen. Titans introduces Dick at a very important and rocky time in his character arch: him leaving Bruce.

If you're not in the know, there's a falling out between Bruce and Dick that's been written a couple different ways over the years, but all comes down to Dick being "fired" from being Robin and leaving Gotham. This is a bit of a newer story line in comparison to how long the character of Dick Grayson has been around, and eventually leads to Dick becoming independent from Bruce, signalling his evolution from "side kick" to his own hero, Nightwing. However, there's issues with Dick having to give up the Robin mantel, because it's something that is whole-heartily Dick Grayson. Robin wasn't something Bruce Wayne came up with, it was the nickname his parents gave to him. Even the colors are his, those were the colors of the Flying Graysons' uniforms. Robin is much more than just a vigilante alter-ego to Dick, it is the last link he has to his past and his parents. So when this is taken away from him and given to another, this causes a huge internal struggle for Dick, as he has to deal with the anger he now has for Bruce, a man he originally looked up to and idolized. This is Dick seeing how wrong it was for Bruce to do some of the things he did to Dick, despite at the time those choices being what both needed.

The way Titans is able to portray this extremely delicate time in Dick's story line in a way that not only makes sense for his character, but also allows for growth is really admirable. Like I said, the show isn't perfect by any means (can I PLEASE get a Romani actor to play Dick PLEASE) but it's the first time I feel that the character is wholeheartedly taken serious in a live-action setting. You can tell the writers have a better idea about how the characters should interact in a live-action setting and while some choices are questionable to me, the heart is there.

Nolan's movies in comparison feel soulless and devoid of all creativity and love. He does not care about these characters, no matter how much he tries to make you think that, and he never will. Christopher Nolan, you will NEVER convince me that you give two shits about Bruce Wayne. And if you, the director, can't bother to care, why should the audience? Why should I care about your adaptation if you can't even be bothered to put an ounce of individuality into it?

With Matt Reeves' Batman films underway, things are getting worse again. For a while, we only had to deal with the shitty Joker adaptations that tried to replicate Ledger's Joker, but with the Reeves Batman movies, the film bros are making themselves known again. I remember when the new design for the Riddler dropped and I said it was shit and people on Twitter and YouTube got SO PISSY at me and told me I just don't understand Batman and that I'm childish for enjoying the designs for Gotham Riddler/ Batman Forever Riddler and whatever and that I'm stupid, which none of those things are true, I hate to be confident in anything, but I think I know more about Batman than you do, Twitter troll.

The suit sucked and the character sucked. They just created a new character but gave him the Riddler's name. That's NOT the Riddler. That's honestly closer to Hush than Riddler, so just... do that? But of course, less people know about Hush than Riddler, and you're not trying to make a film for fans, you're trying to make money, so why would you ever be so silly as to do that! I'm not gonna talk to much about the new Riddler, just because it's super old news and it's not the point I was trying to make here, it's just something that continues to piss me off when it comes to gritty recreations of characters, because Riddler really never was supposed to be some Zodiac Killer wannabe, he's supposed to be a guy who leaves you riddles and makes you solve them and he's supposed to be a little silly about it. And I'm not saying you can't do a more gritty Riddler, because Arkham Knights did it super well imo! Just don't reinvent the wheel! Don't just make a new character and call him by another's name, that's a disservice to the character themselves and their creators.

This is a hard topic, because you have people who get the point of these characters (people who have actually read a comic before and paid attention to the story) but you also have insufferable film/comic bros who worship the ground Nolan and Reeves walks upon and who don't even take time to explore the rest of the Batfamily comics (his gang of vigilante children show up in the stand-alone Batman comics, though, so I don't know how they're missing this, unless they have the reading comprehension of a goldfish, which they probably do tbh). It's why I think a lot of these weirdos don't like Gotham Knights or Wayne Family Adventures, because they hate the thought of there being any semblance of fun in the Batman franchise. Not everything needs to be doom and gloom! Let Dick Grayson be bisexual and let Bruce Wayne have a PTA rival! You can have your cake and eat it too!

I know this seems like a silly sentiment coming from a person who just wrote an entire essay on this, but maybe don't take Batman so seriously? I don't mean, of course, that you can't care about these characters, I'm actually saying the opposite! I care very deeply for these characters, so much that I obviously spat all this out. I just think some people need to fucking chill when it comes to realistically portraying Batman. There's nothing wrong with taking a more serious approach to the characters and I have no problem modernizing them, but you can't just have action hero Batman, you have to have the human behind the mask too. And if you can't balance that, then I'm sorry, but you shouldn't be making Batman adaptations, because you obviously don't understand what the character is about.

I'm nervous to see where Reeves will go with the character, and only time will tell. I've heard rumors he plans to introduce Robin, I've heard rumors he doesn't. Either way, it's obviously out of my hands and I'll have opinions either way, but I really hope he has a better understanding of the history of the franchise than Nolan. While I appreciate, again, what Nolan did for revolutionizing not only the Batman franchise but the comic movie industry as well, I can still find faults in how he went about things. I truly don't believe we can have a worthy adaptation of Batman live action without Robin and without embracing the silliness of Batman's villains and I really hope producers, writers, and directors realize that soon.

Sorry if you read all that...

[ladylucksrogue]

I was going to wait til Monday to post a bit of this, you know for mental health Monday but I decided to roll with it now.

I don’t post a lot of real life things here because this tends to be my little fandom safe space where I love posting my fandom messiness and thirsting over clones and posting my fanfic.  But I have noticed a lot of peeps that I interact with are going through a rough patch.  Post Holiday blues, January blues…something.  It’s rough out there, especially in the real world.

Went through a bit of a slump myself.  Prior to the holidays, I did up my writing plan for all my WIPs.  It was very…ambitious for lack of a better word.  Like damn, I know I can write a lot in a session but we’re talking like a fic a day and that…just hasn’t happened.  So, when I missed a couple days of writing, I was hard on myself.  I hold myself to impossible standards sometimes and forget to give myself space.  

I was pretty hungover on January 1st, the wine got to me a bit more than usual and I just wasn’t feeling writing at all, though I did push myself to write a few words.  I was able to post my New Years story a couple days later but I remember posting and thinking this is shit.  This isn’t your usual, though it’s not terrible in retrospect.  I just…it got to me.  So instead of following my crazy plan I focused on some drabbles and doing Whumpuary, which is thankfully every other day, so it gives me a bit of space.  I have been working on my next installment of my fix-it, which the first scene is light hearted and it’s been fun but slow going.

Had a bit of an epiphany a couple days ago, because of a comment someone said.  And it sent me into a bit of a tail spin.  An angry tailspin that my hubby had to catch the brunt of.  He is fabulous though and just rolls with it, lets me rant and knows that I’ll feel better for it.  Someone in our extended friends group cracked a joke about me not working yet and how I’m just enjoying sitting around at home.  It was meant to be light hearted but it hit wrong on so many levels.

I lost my job last year due to a company restructuring.  It was sudden and I was really angry at the circumstances of it.  And more importantly, because it was the second job I had lost in two years to no fault of my own.  But I still gave myself the fault in all of it.  There was a time where I really struggled to hold down a job for a variety of reasons after I got out of the military, and every time something like this happens, it digs up a bunch of stuff from then…

But the fact of the matter is, since losing my job a lot has happened healthwise and I am actually on disability.  As of right now, I can’t work.  It’s something that has been a long time coming and the timing just happened to work out.  At the same time, people who know react one of two ways, oh but you’re fine, you don’t look sick, why can’t you work, or they start on some BS about must be nice, etc.  I won’t even start on the whole who is deserving and mooching off the government stuff, because I will just make myself upset.

It isn’t nice.  For someone who has worked all their life, I would much rather go to work every day than sit at home.  Weird but true.  And I feel doubt and second guess this and wonder if I can go to work and all this is just me being weak, etc.

Comments like that from people don’t help at all.  And then it happened, the moment of clarity…because usually I’m fine on most days.  And then I was working on a scene, got up to make myself some coffee and I had a moment.  There was a sound in my apartment, no clue what it was, but it set something off in my head and for a good moment, I had this really disorienting moment of not really knowing where I was, like half in a memory and half in the present and trying to sort it.  It’s happened before.  I have PTSD, an autoimmune condition, and a whole list of things, so the amount of times something has gone wrong suddenly is long.  But I’m standing there at my kettle like nearly going into a panic attack and managed to calm myself down and sort what happened.  Had this happened at work, I would have had to go sit somewhere for a bit, wasting work time to pull myself out of it and then pretend to be productive for the rest of the day.  Because, in the immediate aftermath of this, after I calmed down, I was dizzy and exhausted and just done.  No energy left.

And the fact that I was home allowed me to go take a nap for a couple hours and reset so to speak, which is probably the best and most effective way I have found in dealing with a PTSD attack.  It works for me personally better than any med they have given me.  Can’t do that working.  Not to mention, if someone is next to you when stuff like this happens, most people are not willing to understand.  You are immediately judged and ostracized (in my experience) because you do not fit into society’s mold.  

But after all this, it made me realize that I need to give myself a bit of grace.  To allow myself moments to feel bad.  To focus on myself and be accepting.  I think it is a big part of self-care we all forget.  Like even people that don’t have medical conditions or diagnoses need to remember.  We all cannot be perfect and productive always.  Sometimes we need a break.  We need to allow ourselves that.

Especially during this time of year, when stress is high and people are frustrated.  We just all need to give ourselves a pat on the back, take things a day at a time and practice a little acceptance.  Like if we finish that chapter or art or whatever in a day, that is fantastic.  On other days we might not do much of anything, and that is ok too.

This is in no way a message saying I am taking a break btw, so no worries! To those who follow my writing, I am here and writing, just on my own time. So at times, I'll probably post a bunch at once and other times, it'll be a bit slow going. Also, keep asks and interactions coming, absolutely keeps me sane and happy to keep interacting!

[thoughtfulfangirling]

Mercy sat down behind her desk. “If I can bring her back, if I can give her back to her family,” she looked up at Winston, tears in her eyes, “, that would be the best thing, wouldn’t it? A family to lose someone and get them back.” She shook her head. “I don’t expect you to understand.”

Oh I love this fic. I love seeing Winston and Angela meet! And TRACER BROUGHT THEM TOGETHER! Before she was even around to do so. Without meaning to. She's just that magnetic XD I love the ways they misinterpret each other because they don't know each other and they feel surrounded by a certain kind of people so they think the other must fit in with those people. God, this shit is so good!

"Tracer!” There was a break in his voice, the sound of someone losing a friend. “–s all right, Ben.” Her voice became chipper and familiar, even over the worsening static. “—ings do happen—a pint on me, love” She began to sing as the radio went in and out. “-versities we’ll conquer, Blaze into the star–on land and sea–is won–the skies are winging–one thought–fight for the right–”

This is so real and painful. Tracer does seem to think this is it, and she spends last minutes soothing a friend with a chipper song. But also, also more than that, enjoying her last moments, refusing to spend them just feeling terror and certainly not regret. No, she's going to go out bombastic and enjoying each drop of life she can get! God I love her.

“I don’t understand why I’m here.” ... he was grateful, in fact, hopeful that this position could show his worth and use, that the moon colony hadn’t all been a mistake, that he could bring one good thing from it.

Oh Winston, as if you're not one good thing that came from it! OUCH MY HEART

I’m so sorry, but don’t you mean ‘her’? It is for things. Not people.”” She smiled. “But it’s not my first language, of course.”

Oh ho ho!! Hehe snarky Mercy! You don't get to see that too often but absolutely it suits her in this moment! In this context! I love it!!

“So why are you doing it?” Winston questioned himself as much as her, in that moment.

Oh I LOVE this. He has so much respect for Mercy that while he asks her this and it sounds like he wants her reasons, he's hoping to find purpose in her answer, that she can answer for both of them. And I love that. We do this shit all the time I think.

AND THEN THAT ENDING ANGELA YOU ANGEL I LOVE YOU

Winston #7: “I don’t believe in ghosts.”

LET’S GET INTO ANOTHER ENTIRELY TOO LONG OW FIC SHALL WE. This is part one, I’m looking to publish at least one part a week til I finish it. If you want to read the rest of my OW stuff it’s right here. 1,884 words. 

“Senior Pilot Lena A. Oxton, callsign Tracer, female, aged 26.” The file was set in front of the Winston and he began to page through it, though he’d read it before. A second glance never hurt anything. “Formerly of the Royal Air Force, one of the top pilots for Overwatch’s Air Division.”

“Her father has taken an interest in Overwatch’s experiments since her death.” Winston turned to see a young blonde woman, her hair tied up in a messy knot. Her accent was soft and pleasant. German, maybe? His ear wasn’t always as good as he hoped. “It’s all over the news, his campaign.”

He sighed. “It’s���unfortunate how much attention has been brought to a highly necessary form of ensuring the safety of the world.”

“So she died during the Slipstream test?” Winston looked up at the commander. He’d been given the file, but it had been surprisingly thin, a testament to the secrecy Overwatch had been accused of.

He said nothing, simply hit the switch on a small box on the table. It buzzed to life, a bright voice crackling over the airwaves.

“Control, I’m ‘aving trouble with the,” the radio fuzzed out, static exploding from the speaker, “can’t get an ‘old on–” her voice blurred and faded.

“Tracer, this is Control, come in, Tracer.” There was a measured military panic in the young man’s voice.

“What–blinking–need–”

“Tracer, come in. Tracer. Do. you. Read?”

It was uncomfortable, the feeling of sitting in someone’s last moments, feeling the rising terror seep through the speaker and into their minds, so much harder and more real than reading it on a page.

“I–God–oh bloody hell!” She seemed more annoyed than anything at her aircraft’s disobedience, and it soothed WInston a little. “–not brilliant.”

“What is your position, Tracer?” There was no answer. “Tracer, come in!”

The static dropped, and there was a silence that stretched on for seconds. Then, her voice, straightforward and firm.

“Control, I’m going down.”

“Tracer!” There was a break in his voice, the sound of someone losing a friend.

“–s all right, Ben.” Her voice became chipper and familiar, even over the worsening static. “—ings do happen—a pint on me, love” She began to sing as the radio went in and out. “-versities we’ll conquer, Blaze into the star–on land and sea–is won–the skies are winging–one thought–fight for the right–”

The static fell into one solid hum.

Keep reading

[steakout-05]

i think all those autism vlogging youtube channels that post distressing videos of their children having meltdowns and intense panic attacks for thousands and thousands of people to see should be deleted and banned off the website and i am not kidding. i don't care what excuse they use whether it's "oh no it's for education purposes! so clearly posting our kids in state of extreme emotional and mental distress is okay 😊" or some other excuse, it's not okay to post your kids in what can be a very vulnerable and embarrassing state to be in for the whole internet to see. don't even come at me with that "they asked for the videos to be posted!" rubbish kids cannot consent to that no matter how intelligent or informed they are about the consequences of those videos going online. children cannot and should not consent to those videos going up and it pisses me off that the blatant exploitation of children and disabled people is still normalised and excused like this. cause that's what it is. it's exploitative of the vulnerable no matter how much it swears it's trying to be educational. 99% of the time the only reason these kinds of videos are online is to get clicks and views and money and it's disgusting.

[nullians]

It’s actually insane how fandom in general has become so scared of making weird and dark and ugly works. Like I look at myself and see how I have also subconsciously adapted this instinct to self censor and make things “marketable” and it’s making me want to crawl out of my skin. I need to get weirder and worse and more off-putting hello

[cosmicterrorthe8th]

Another Grant headcanon:

I think he wrote love notes when in relationships, and he went all out with like making the paper scented and stuff. But like he had no good perfume so he ended up using his horrible body spray. So like the lucky boyfriend would like find a paper reeking of the body spray like every once in a while.

Also I think he was someone who fell deep into romance because having a crush and feeling butterflies in his stomach was better than numbness. So he would pursue every crush even if he knew it would not end well because of the thrill of it. I think this sucked but I think he atleast felt like this is a normal way for life to suck.

[arolesbianism]

Welcome to the “they’re just like me fr (derogatory)” club featuring no color because I would rather die than draw Sif with color

[camgirlkaminari]

i just caught up with the latest chapters and like. those dudes definitely made out right? like that's not even subtext? like horikoshi fully said one and two absolutely went hog wild upon each other like. in the text, right??????? I have other, more cool and normal thoughts, but what is really important to me right now is that. those dudes definitely canonically got nasty. right???????????????????

[lecliss]

I'll never be able to take the theory that Vincent is Sephiroth's real father seriously cuz I cannot stress enough how important I think it is to the plot that Vincent wanted to fuck Lucrecia and did not get to.

[kairithemang0]

call me as many slurs as you want and it’ll barely phase me but if you call me penis lacker (derogatory) I will beat the shit out of you and then cry for hours

[deerest-deer]

thinking really hard about logging into my old tumblr acc after being gone for like a year and a half cause i stumbled upon a post that led me to my old mutuals and i teared up a lil </3 but also i feel so ashamed i left without saying a word to anyone aaaa

[infinitelystrangemachinex]

Come on, you know you want to, give us the character bingo for Viktor.

don't mind if i doooo