#me on discord vc

[gravity-magnet]

he does this all the time btw

[astrallouis]

the ody3 fic is abt to get so good. theyre cowards for cutting to black without tristan and max kissing tho. fingers crossed for gay week

[subject4a]

[tiniestbun]

Art Fight attack for @aychama !! I had so much fun drawing your Shamura :> The battle picture seems fitting for this King

[lpsotd]

hi!! just wondering if you can identify this lps for me? i've never seen it before and it looks soooo cute! sorry about 9/11 being there..

this ask has been killing me for at least five minutes. i want you to know how funny this is to me. this ask is literally the reason i was able to pull myself out of bed because i had to answer it asap. i'm sorry but the cat ain't the center of this image ... /silly

anyhoot ... i'm pretty sure that's kitten #1584 from one of the generation 3 '2-in-1 pet spotlight diorama' with bear #1583 :3c

[blackkatdraws2]

Here's my recent drawings somehow always having Captain or Narry involved in it.

✩ people featured: @braisedhoney @beartitled

[ranvwoop]

— some sort of doctrine in which you're already missed

bisexualdomtorreto / tinyhappy / the worm king’s lullaby - richard siken / in a dream you saw a way to survive - clementine von radics , for m - mikko harvey / the world is ending - judas h. / loose lips - kimya dawson / arcuiedbrunestud / scp-6476 - tsercele / catalogue of unabashed gratitude - ross gay / no one belongs here more than you - miranda july / creatinghelen / the light that shines when things end -  iaon s. thomas

[helianss]

this is the worst and best thing ive ever drawn uhm !

[youjustfeelthemforever]

if you put holy water in an ice machine, would it come out as holy ice?

[lunapegasus]

Redraw of my team dark figures 💥🌴

[verityblack]

Trying to watch the Circe Hermes saga on the live listening party like

[sm-baby]

going insane .... losing my mind..... caine and pomni.... they're so good.............................

This is so fucking funny

the Showtime Shipper pipeline... we ALLL understand you, Waddles.. and please keep sharing them, we are ALL SO FUCKING HUNGRY AND NOT NORMAL ABOUT THEM

i would like to give you a proper welcome... via a sticker

also teehee!! THANK YOUU!! IM GLAD YOU'VE BEEN ENJOYING THE CARNIVAL SO FAR

[mothercetrion]

I had a really angsty idea regarding certain aspects of Johnny's relationship with his father. under the cut for length and sensitive topics.

(CW for mentions of (physical) child abuse)

—

when Johnny is around eleven, he breaks some kind of one-of-a-kind thing in his dad's house when he is over there. he tries to cover it up, but his dad finds out when Jimmy (older brother) rats him out. Johnny tries to explain that it was an accident but is ignored, and his dad is angry at the inconvenience that Johnny has created and punishes him accordingly. it's one of the most notable instances of Johnny's dad being physically abusive to the point of him being frightened of him (and the fear of him remains, only getting worse as Johnny gets older). for months after, each time his dad lifts his hand, he flinches. he doesn't look his dad in the eye anymore so he doesn't look like he's intimidating (but he looks him in the eye when he's being yelled at; lack of eye contact means he's being disrespectful and just makes it worse). he memorizes the sound of his footsteps—and whether or not he's angry depending on those footsteps—to know if he needs to pretend to be asleep or hide from him.

when Johnny is 15, he accidentally breaks a plate when he's getting dinner. the plate shatters, and Johnny finds that breaking things period immediately causes a physical reaction. his stomach drops, he gets nauseous, and he gets incredibly tense, just waiting for his dad to get angry. it doesn't take long, and Johnny is punished accordingly and sent to his room without dinner that night. he cries himself to sleep and does so for many nights after when he dreams about his dad's reaction.

when Johnny is an adult, living alone in college, he breaks a plate again. his own plate, in his own home, and he still panics. he has a panic attack in his own kitchen and scrambles to clean it up, even though he's alone and his dad has been dead for a year. nothing's going to happen, and he still panics and hurries to get it up all the same.

when he and Kenshi are dating, maybe only for a few months, they plan a date night at Johnny's place. Johnny reaches up to get a glass down and it slips out of his hand, and it breaks into several large pieces at his feet. Kenshi is in the kitchen with him, and imagine his shock when Johnny physically flinches and falls to his knees to get it up. Johnny almost immediately starts panicking, his breaths rapid and shallow, and he is trembling from head to toe. he won't look at Kenshi, even when he asks him what's wrong, and he's focused on cleaning it up because Kenshi's going to be mad and he's going to yell at him and how could he have broken the glass like this and he's such a shitty boyfriend-

Kenshi kneels on the floor and tries talking to him more to find out what's going on because he is extremely worried. it's entirely out of character for Johnny to be so frazzled about anything, and he is clearly freaking out and in another world entirely. Johnny suddenly picks up a piece of glass and cuts his outer palm on accident. he doesn't react, and he doesn't slow down, even when it's clear that it's a bad cut. Kenshi's instincts take over, and he grabs Johnny's hand. Johnny physically jolts at the sensation and its lack of violence. "Johnny, you're hurt, stop. let me see," and Kenshi is so gentle and not at all angry that it immediately shatters the defense he has put up for himself—if he stops reacting to things, they can't bother him, he's fine, he isn't scared, he's not upset, he's fine, he's fine, he's fine—and Johnny immediately starts sobbing. within seconds, he's out of breath, and he's literally wailing. he covers his face with the hand not in Kenshi's, weakly trying to hide it from Kenshi, but it's clear all the same.

Kenshi is immediately confused because what the hell is going on? Johnny is panicking over a broken glass, and Kenshi unfortunately knows enough about Johnny's childhood (still very little, but enough all the same) to put the pieces together. he puts his other hand on Johnny and pulls him into a hug, and Johnny freaks out a little more before he fully leans into him. they sit on the floor for half an hour while Kenshi tries to bring Johnny back to reality, assuring him that he's safe, he's with Kenshi, they're at home, it's okay, he hasn't done anything wrong. Johnny apologizes under his breath over and over and over again, it's all he can do right then, it's all he's known. over apologizing when you aren't sure what you actually did wrong.

Johnny eventually stops panicking, and Kenshi just holds him a bit longer. his heart is still racing, and he's shaking from head to toe. but then Kenshi remembers that he's hurt, and he gently pushes him out of his hug and asks to see his hand. Johnny won't even look at him and shakes his head no. Kenshi says that he needs to see so he can help, assuring him again that he's not upset and just wants to make sure it's not that bad. Johnny doesn't say anything, so Kenshi takes his hand and looks at the cut. it's not enough for stitches but it'll have to be cleaned and covered regardless. Kenshi helps Johnny to his feet and guides him to the bathroom, and Johnny sits on the closed toilet while Kenshi kneels on the bathroom floor. he has to use Sento to see, and he gets the first aid kit and cleans the cut and covers it. Johnny occasionally flinches, and he's still shaking, and Kenshi comforts him with his free hand and an occasional vocal assurance. he's eventually taken care of in that regard, but he's still deeply frazzled and incredibly shaken.

Kenshi takes both of his hands, squeezes them as safely as he can. "breathe with me, Johnny," and they sit together and simply breathe for ten minutes or so. Johnny holds Kenshi's hands like a lifeline, and he shuts his eyes and slouches and focuses on his breathing. every now and then, a breath will hitch, and Kenshi kisses the tops of his hands and eventually moves their hands to Kenshi's chest so Johnny can feel his heartbeat. "you're safe. you're with me. you're doing great. breathe. breathe. breathe." Johnny is doing a lot better after that. however, he still hasn't said anything to Kenshi since everything started other than his apologies, and he's clearly mentally and physically exhausted. he needs to rest. "do you want to go lie down?" a nod. "alright, come on." Kenshi stands and pulls Johnny with him, and they walk together into the bedroom. Johnny sits on the edge of the bed, and Kenshi dismisses himself to let Johnny change (if he wants to, but he does not) and to get him a snack.

Kenshi goes into the kitchen and cleans up the broken glass. the mess truly wasn't that bad, and it took 45 seconds for him to get it disposed of. it makes the fact that Johnny panicked—and Kenshi's guess as to why—all the more gutting. Kenshi gets him a bottle of water, a bottle of blue Gatorade (his favorite), and a peanut butter Clif Bar. he goes back in the bedroom to see that Johnny hasn't moved an inch, and he's staring off at a wall. though not panicking, he's still in another world entirely.

Kenshi steps up and offers what's brought. Johnny looks down with his eyes, but his expression is still indifferent, and he doesn't move. Kenshi unscrews the lid of the water and holds it up to Johnny's mouth, and Johnny drinks. Kenshi offers the Gatorade then and then the Clif Bar. they spend ten minutes like that, Kenshi holding things up for him to have because he needs to eat and drink. at least a little. he finishes around half of the Clif Bar and most of the Gatorade, but he eventually turns his cheek in silent rejection.

Kenshi feels conflicted because he wants to find out what's going on and why he panicked. but he knows that he won't get an answer when Johnny is in a state like this, so he decides to let him rest and ask him when he's doing a bit better.

after that, Kenshi helps Johnny lie down and get comfortable, he covers him with the blanket and even lays with him. he's not tired, but he knows Johnny is and wants him to feel less alone. out of nowhere, Johnny apologizes again, and Kenshi asks why he would apologize, he's not done anything wrong. Johnny looks away and mumbles, "I ruined your night." that's all he says, and it's so telling all the same. Kenshi assures him again that he hasn't done anything wrong and certainly hasn't ruined anything. "I want you to be safe, Johnny, and comfortable. I would do this again and again if I needed," and then he adds, "and you can tell me anything by the way," as a silent invitation to talk about what's bothering him when he's ready. Johnny looks at him in shock for several seconds before he nods.

and that's that. Kenshi lays with him and eventually starts running a hand through his hair, brushing it out of his face and massaging his head. he worries about a headache from all that crying. Johnny lays there with his eyes closed and eventually relaxes enough to take a nap. Kenshi doesn't move an inch, just in case.

[instantpansies]

on hour three of painting details on a piece of stupidly complex fanart for a british improv comedy group. again. they put something in those plays that infected my brain istg

the only concept of time i have is the fact that the lights in here are on a 1 hour timer lmao

uh. progress sneak peek ig?

[shovson]

James Vowles and Andrew Shovlin in the 2020 Italian GP Debrief video

[hilacopter]

torn between not being able to trust goyim to not be antisemitc anymore unless they really prove me otherwise and going "I guess we'll get along" when they find out I'm Israeli and still treat me like a human being