#me giggling and kicking my feet every time someone goes through and likes/reblogs all the swannie comics

[tangledinink]

easily one of my favorite things ever is when i get to watch the notifications from someone new reading one of my comic series pop up in real time. ESPECIALLY if they leave commentary in the tags.

[ozarkthedog]

Stuck Between a Rock and a Hard D***

Summary: After a Welcome Home party, you get stuck in a uncompromising position and Chris can’t seem to help himself.

Pairings: Drunk!Chris Evans x Drunk!Female Reader

Warnings: SMUT. Intoxication. Swearing. Slight Degradation. Confined Spaces. Anal Play.

Word Count: 2,236

A/N: This idea popped into my head and it was so silly I just couldn’t help but write it. I tried to have his “Drunk” state come across hence all the slurring words. Hope it’s not that annoying to read! This drunk Boston boy has “mah” heart. 💙 

No Beta

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Reblogs and Likes are amazing! Feedback and Comments are encouraged!

Energetic music, copious amounts of liquor and sounds of splashing from the pool filled the dusky sky as the ‘Welcome Home’ party was in full swing on this humid August night.

Chris was finally home after 3 months away and what better than to throw a little bash. Friends and family were sprawled out over the backyard of Chris’ Concord house laughing and carrying on as you sipped on your wine.

You swirled the tart liquid around your tongue and leaned against a patio chair, watching as Dodger ran around with the younger kids. Their screams of enjoyment sounded noisily as they ran from the mutt.

“Get ‘em Bubba!” You heard Chris yell from across the yard.

Beer in hand, cap on backwards and dancing like a fool. Your boy was home.

Warmth filled your belly as you watched him laugh and play a yard game with a few of his friends, all yelling with excitement when someone got the small sack in the hole.

He caught your eyes from across the lush backyard and held it with a sly stare. He licked his lips lewdly knowing what it’d do to you.

You shook your head and drank down the rest of your wine, trying not to get too worked up. There would be plenty of time for that tonight, you smirked to yourself as the pleasant haze of the liquor settled in your belly.

-

After a while, the party started to dwindle. You and Chris gave hugs and bid goodbyes as the night came to a close.

For a moment, you and Chris just stared at one another on the slate patio. A days’ worth of playful glances coming to a head.

You smoothed down your light summer dress, unsure of what to do now that you were finally alone after so much time apart.

The alcohol made his face flush a few shades lighter than the red t-shirt he wore which made him endearing even though his eyes were darkening by the minute.

The amount of lust that radiated off the two of you was hostile, but you pushed it aside as you peered over the various empty beer bottles and half eaten food platters.

“Ugh, we should clean this up.” You picked up an empty beer can before tossing it back onto the table with a laugh.

“Nah, let’s do it tomorrow.” Chris suggested, stalking over to you.

Your breathing escalated as his face held a serious expression despite the slight slurring, “I wanna fuck mah Girl right now.”

You giggled nervously at his tone. The alcohol made everything seem way too funny, but his intense stare had your core clenching.

You knew what would happen if he got his hands on you and you wanted to draw out the yearning just a little bit longer.

“Only if you can catch me!” You shout, before running away like the drunken idiot you were.

You ran up the steps of the patio as carefully as your inebriated self could and crawled through the small dog door Chris had installed for Dodger a year ago.

Halfway through, you heard Chris’s muffled, hysterical laughter through the door. You knew he was doubling over in a fit, which allowed you to more time to crawl through the narrow opening.

You were in the clear as you pushed on the balls of your toes, shimmying your lower half through when suddenly, “OOF!”

Your hips collided with the casing of the small pet door. You started laughing at what a silly idea this was until you moved to pull back and your upper body catches on the frame.

You try again but the door nudges against your armpits causing your arms to flail out in front of you on the den floor.

“Oh, fuck! Chris! I’m stuck!” You yell frantically, kicking your feet on the slate patio.

You try to push yourself through even though you knew your hips were too wide. The small plastic door thumping against your head with every jostle.

“What!?” Chris shouts, incredulously.

 “I’m stuck!” You scream into the empty room as he kneels down next to your torso less frame. 

“Are yah serious?”

“What do you think?!”

Chris busts out laughing again, falling to his hands on the patio. His abs hurt as he tries to stop laughing when you let out a number of swears.

He coughs away the laughter and lays a hand on your lower back. “Ok. Ok. Ok. Ya’ll will be fine. We’ll get yah loose.” He slurred, calming you down through the door.

His hands cover your hips and pulled only to have your armpits halt his actions. “I already tried that you, Meatball.” The buzz from the wine still flowing through your veins.

“What are we going to do?” You utter, finishing with a hiccup.

“I’ll get my tools. But first…” His deep, quiet voice alerted you.

“What is it?” You asked anxiously, thinking one of your friends was coming up the driveway. You’d be mortified if they found you like this.

But then a warm hand slid down the curve of your ass and settled on the top of your hamstring. 

“I’m gonna have some fun.” Chris declared with a playful tone.

Your eyes go wide when you feel him flip your summer dress over your hips and press his growing hard on against your ass. The dark jeans rubbed against your ass with every languid thrust.

“Chris! You can’t!” You shriek upon realizing his intentions.

“Who says? Look at mah girl on all fours, ripe fa the takin’.” His eyes are glassy and ravenous as he grinds against your heat, the thin panties doing nothing to hide your quickly growing arousal.

Your mouth goes slack and eyes flutter when you feel him straining through his jeans. Heady lust swarms your system, taking control regardless of the uncompromising position.

“Looks like someone is enjoyin’ being stuck.” He rasped, unzipping his jeans and sliding his cock head across the soaked material of your panties.

He pulls the drenched thong to the side, groaning when he sees how ready you are. “What a fuckin’ pretty pussy.” He bends down, swiping his tongue threw your folds eliciting a surprised gasp from your lips.

You slam a hand onto the floor as he prods your core with long licks and lewd slurps. “God, I missed yah taste.” He confessed and nuzzled his face back into your heat. The way his beard scratched over your thighs made your back arch, giving him better access.

Your tight opening clenched when he poked his tongue into your core, thrusting the strong muscle in and out with quick jabs before going lower.

He flicked at your clit with hard swipes causing your belly to somersault. Frantic gasps bounce off the den walls with every stroke forcing your pleasure to mount rapidly.

Just as your bliss was about to peak, Chris pulled back with a slick covered smirk. “Nawt so fast, Sweetheart.”

You whined your frustration and laid your head on the cool flooring. You wiggled your hips in the air desperate for any friction and heard him snicker before he smacked your wandering behind with a heavy thud.

“I ain’t felt this cunt in months.” He stated with a deep growl, rubbing his pulsing crown through your inner lips.

His nails scratch the swell of your naked ass, “And yah only cummin’ when my cock is buried deep inside yah.”

You bit your lip knowing what was coming. The intense energy was palpable all night and it was only a matter of time before you two met in a tangle of limbs.

Chris lines up and ever so slowly pushes into your wanton core.

Your smothering heat enveloped his cock as he split you open with a gravely groan. “Fuck.”

Your head sagged between your arms as you felt your walls stretch around his girth. It’d been too long; you’d forgotten just how big he was. A high pitched mewl slipped from your throat, nails scratching at the floor when he finally bottomed out.

The base of his cock spreading you just a bit more around him. “God, yah cunt is choking the life outta me.”

He pulls back slowly before thrusting all the way in. Your cervix swirls around his bulbous tip making him grunt and grasp your hips with a harsh grip.

The animalistic urge to claim diminished when he felt your walls squeeze around his veiny thickness. His hips bumped against your ass with every stroke lightly knocking your hips against the door. 

You mewled when he parted your cheeks, spreading your pussy even wider for him.

“So many nights I took myself in mah hand picturin’ this sweet, little pussy.” His brows pinch in pleasure hearing your muffled cries of rapture through the door.

“I couldn’t get off hard enough knowin’ I wasn’t balls deep inside yah fillin’ yah with my cum.” His admission made your belly tighten. The knot so close to snapping as his hips shoved into your soaked heat with fervor.

His secure hold on your hips slips from the sweat tainting your skin. He smooths his fallen hand over your ass, spreading it open and exposing your asshole.

Your breath catches when you feel him spit onto your exposed hole, thumbing his saliva around as it clenched under his touch. The groan he let out when he watched your tight ring spasm beneath his thumb was sinful.

You whimpered into the flooring with every thrust of his cock as he teases your puckered rim. “I could finally take this untouched hole and there wouldn’t be anythin’ yah could do to stop me.” Your pussy convulsed around his length at the ominous threat.

“Chris…” Your body arched under his assault when he circled your rim with a meticulous touch.

You lock down with a vice like grip on his length as he drives your orgasm head on. You slap at the flooring and shout out your release all over his meaty cock.

He growls in admiration, “Look at the mess yah made all over me, yah naughty girl.”

He snapped his hips hard causing you to yelp out in painful pleasure, your cervix taking the brunt of each shove. The torturous pain ebbed and flowed with the bliss he was forcing on your worn-out body. Tremors ran up your spine as he pummeled you into another orgasm so close behind the first.

“Wish I could see yah face, bet yah look so wrecked takin’ mah cock.”

He let out a surprised groan as you came around him again, mewling nonsense and shrill yelps from behind the door.

“Fuck! Cumming on mah dick outside where anyone could see.” He smacked your ass eliciting a pained gasp from your lips.

He picked up speed, thrusting into you with a punishing pace intent on driving you to another orgasm with his on the precipice.

Chris gathers some of your cum and drags it around your asshole, making it shine with slick. Your eyes rolled back when he tenderly pushed his thumb into you, feeling his cock pass by through the thin tissue with every shove.

“God, yah so pretty bent over with yah holes filled to the brim.”

He grits, feeling you clench around his girth and frantically calling out for him.

“Come on, cum on mah cock one more time. Give me that sweet cunt.” His thumb pulls on the side your hole, making you feel the stretch and forces your orgasm to explode through your core. Both your holes tighten as you cum, dragging Chris along with you.

His hips slam into yours rapidly, searing pleasure burning through his veins as he cums with a growl. His seed painting your channel, soaking you with him.

He pants heavily as he leans his head on the door, “God damn, I’ve missed this.” 

You whimper from the emptiness when he pulls from your heat.

His cum slipping from your core, staining your inner thighs making you shiver.

“What a sight.”

You hear a shutter click and realize he just snapped a photo. “Chris!”

“Hey, this doesn’t happen all the time. I want somethin’ to remember this.” He slaps your ass making you jolt.

“Believe me, I will never forget this.” You utter with an embarrassed groan and shift uncomfortably on the hard slate. “Chris can you go get your tools, my knees are starting to hurt.”

“Oh fuck. Yeah, here kneel on mah shirt. I’ll be right back.” He rips his shirt off and slides it under your knees before running off to the garage.

You sighed into the floor still dumbfounded that you even though you could fit through the tiny door. The alcohol was slowing wearing off making this predicament even worse just as Chris came back. 

“Chris, are you still really drunk? Should you be working with tools right now?” You asked, leaning your face onto your hands. You really didn’t want him hurting you or himself.

Chris sat back a moment and chewed on his lip. “Yah, know... yah might be right. I only brought a hammer and I don’t think that will work.”

“Fuck.”

“Don’t worry Sweetheart, Imma call Mom she’ll know what to do.” Chris said with a smile, taking out his cell.

You hid your face in your hands with a pitiful groan knowing his family would never let you live this down.

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

seeing someone else.

BISHOP LOSA. MAYANS MC ┃ USEFUL LINKS

❝ request by @encounterthepast: Hello lovely Aurora, can I request angst prompt number 7 with Bishop please, thank you, 💕

❝ prompt: “Don’t you dare to lie to me again”.

❝ request by @arveeee: Hello my dear, so I was thinking, and there is one sentence to that can't go out of my head. So it is: "let me in" with Bishop (I know I'm boring). Well I believe in you, I love you , and I love your writing. Say hello to Arya.

❝ request by anon: Hi, Aurora. I love your writing sm 🥺 I was wondering if I could request an imagine with my man Bishop? I was thinking of something like the reader and him being in kinda like a friends with benefits situation, but she decides to break it offf because she’s really upset. And maybe Bishop doesn’t understand so she eventually explains to him that she wants more out of their relationship and he reassures her they are more and they always have been? Maybe leads to like soft/romantic smut? Thanks so much!

❝ request by @meteora-fc: hello hello! so, that new trailer huh?😵 would absolutely love if you could write me something for a stressed out bishop with the prompts "Stop ignoring me, it’s driving me crazy!" and "Let me help you make it better." Thank you tons!!💖

❝ words: about 1.4k.

❝ a / n: as always, don’t forget to comment and reblog if you liked it!

Another tequila shot goes down your throat, ripping it off as you almost smash the small glass on the table. Tossing your head back as you rest your back against the sofa, sitting on the floor, you take a look around you. The gloomy has taken over your house as the night has fallen a couple of hours ago. It's the fourth night you are trying to forget about Bishop and whatever you two had. But you can't dismiss from your mind his caresses —his fingers drawing patterns on your back, his lips touring your neck with delicate kisses as if he was afraid of breaking your skin, his mustache tickling your inner thighs, his raspy voice articulating your name in moans. It's the fourth night miserably failing, remembering the last time you spent together, the way he was holding his back pretending he wasn't sad because you were leaving him.

“Obispo, it's over. Don't make a big deal. We're just friends who occasionally fucks”. You scoffed somewhat annoyed because of him and his interrogation, but how could you tell him you were falling in love with him?

“I ain't making any deal, (Y/N). I just want to know what made you change your mind and keep a wide berth”.

“I'm seeing someone else”.

"Don't you dare to lie to me”. He growled, taking a step closer towards you with the intention of stopping you from picking up and packing the less stuff you had in his house.

“Think what you want”. You replied, rolling your eyes.

The first tear flows in the left corner of your mouth not appreciably at first, but then, some more until finding yourself crying. You miss him so much. You miss watching him sleep peacefully in the small hours, drifting slightly when you caress his cheek using your fingertips. Flexing your knees to your chest, you wrap your arms around trying to contain the loud sobs, hiding your face between them. How have you been so stupid to fall for him like that? The two of you made it clear from the very first moment. Friends with benefits. But after a couple of weeks, you started to notice that he used to push away any other woman that it wasn't you, he didn't spend much time in the clubhouse preferring to do it in your house —cuddling, watching movies, playing poker; kissing every single inch of flesh covering your anatomy.

Reality hit you the moment he murmured something like you're a miracle, thinking you were calmly sleeping between his strong arms and your back stuck to his chest, no distance among your bodies. You knew it was a thing produced by the alcohol running through your veins and it wasn't fair for you to fantasize about the idea he was catching feelings for you. So you just ran away, like a coward.

Some clumsy knocks on the front door of your house bring you back to reality. At first, you try to ignore them. It's not like you're in the mood for visits, knowing that probably it's Leti at the other side of the place, worried because you haven't replied to her text all day. But she insists and insists. And you know how stubborn she can be sometimes. Serving yourself another shot and drinking it in just one gulp, because you're too sober to endure another of her Ted talks about positivism and what he has lost, you stand up on your bare feet. Everything around you spins dizzyingly for a second until you can react, feeling every knock like a hammer hitting your brain.

“I've heard you the fi—”.

Opening the door to receive her, your vocals get frozen as you face Bishop in a deplorable drunk state. Just like you are.

“Let me in”. He barks, not being able to look at your eyes, trying to pass you away to the inside, but you stop him.

“Go home, Obis—”.

“I'm home, shut the fuck up”. He frowns taking a sip from a bottle of whisky you haven't noticed till now. “You think you can kick my fuckin' ass outta your life by saying you're seeing someone else? You think I'm fuckin' stupid, queri— Were you crying…?”

From anger, his tone of voice falls to one lower and lower, as the concern and the worry cover his annoyance completely. Throwing away his drink to somewhere over the grass of your yard, he holds your face onto his palms. His touch causes you to tremble. His warm touch causes you to break into aching sobs, panting as you can't breathe properly. All this time you've been thinking you have missed him, but you didn't have a real idea of how it feels until his fingers have been laid on your wetted skin.

Bishop comes closer to you, touching the tip of your nose with his. You can smell the mixed scent of cigarettes and whisky emanating from his cracked lips, it doesn't bother you, tho. “Don't kiss me, please”.

Until this precise moment, he has loved your begs and pleads to his bones, but now he hates them more than anything he could ever hate in his life. It breaks his heart. He can't deal with your rejection one night more.

“Why…? Why can't I kiss you?” He asks desperately at the edge of his tears. “Please, stop ignoring me, it's driving me crazy. I can't even take care of my own shit without you by my side”.

Your knees feel weak at his words, still believing he only says that because you're just a good lover, the best in the sheets, as he told you once.

“I… I…” You babble nervously, trying to not place your hands on the laps of his leather kutte to finally push him into the needed kiss you've been craving for the last four days. “I love you”.

And why the confession doesn't take him by surprise? Why doesn't he look confused? Why does it seem like he already knew it? Bishop can't help but draw a fleeting grin across his face.

“Do you think I came here, falling into pieces, just because it feels like being in Heaven when I'm deep inside you?” He whispers, clicking his tongue slightly. “I didn't believe you when you told me you were seeing someone else. But the minimal thought I could have about it made me lose the less sanity I have”.

You blink stupefied at his own confession about his feelings. Your fingers tour his abdomen up in slow motion, starting to have some faith in his words.

“Mi amor…” Bishop mumbles in soft giggles shaking his head. “I adore you, mi amor. I don't want anything else than to share my life with you, and only with you”.

He doesn't wait for a signal from you to kiss your lips, he just takes what it's his. And you can't hold back a painful gasp, expelling in it all the sorrow you've been carrying for the last four days being separated from him. Your hands grip his shirt in two fists, pushing him as much closer as the two of you can be, about to melt in the same figure. All this time you have been trying to not love him, to forget him; and you were just delaying the inevitable. You are made for each other, that's a fact. Your lips fit to perfection —your bodies, your hearts.

“Tell me you love me”. You whimper against his mouth, causing him to smile because of your need of making it real by these simple three words.

“Love isn't enough to express what you make me feel”.

Bishop bends down without prior notice to wrap his huge hands on the back of your thighs, urging you to jump onto him and surround his waist with your legs. You haven't forgotten how good his warmth takes over you when he holds you like that, walking inside your house and kicking the door close. Guiding his steps across your place and its hallways, he reaches your dark dorm barely illuminated by a post light outdoors. He lies you down on your bed —a bed that has welcomed you for the last eight months in every kind of state. Drunk, tired, happy.

Now, you're a mix of them. Drunk in tequila, tired of crying, but happy for having him back for the rest of your life.

GENERAL TAG LIST: @mayans-sauce @peoniarose @destynelseclipsa @band-psycho @myakai13 @petlaufeyson @-im-fantastic- @horsesandwolvesaremyanimals @rocketqueen @rosieposie0624 @ellyseveronica @Jessprins13 @diaryofkali @ravenmoore14 @starrynite7114 @kenbechillin @miahelen @monkeyluver4546 @sheeshgivemeabreak @jadesamhart @rawrlittlepanda-95 @megapeacelovemusic-blog @katsav17 @skits90s @wildsould1221 @littlekittymeow @tenderclio @badame1240 @regalbanshee @greeneyedblondie44 @phoenixhalliwell @codenamewife

MAYANS MC: @multiyfandomgirl40 @countryash345 @skyofficialxx @lovebishoplosamiguelgalindo @bellisperennis0 @chibsytelford @trulysuccubus @purrrrfect @witching-hour @leathercladmenfics @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @queenbeered @sesamepancakes @gemini0410 @pinguinstudiert @oscars-wifeyyy @meteora-fc @lozaa94 @arveee @joupym @hanster1998 @missswritings @arana-alpha

[cassiabaggins]

An Extra Burglar Chapter Nine: Goblin Town

A/N: Happy Halloween! This is a sort of topical chapter, I suppose? Anyway, happy Fili Friday, as well! Please reblog and leave a comment if you enjoyed this! 

Warnings: Canon-typical violence

Word Count: 4,050

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Tags: @demigoddesofchimichangagod @pistachiozombie @swoopswishsward @d3-iseefire @moony-artnstuff @legolasesboo522 @sage-willow-raven @underthemoon-n @legolaslovely @guardianofrivendell 

 Cassia wakes up quite quickly. You cannot stay half asleep while hurtling down a stone tunnel, and even less so when you land with a thud in a gigantic metal and wood cage. She lands on top of Fili and Kili, lucky to not land on the bottom of the pile, though Kili groans when she kicks him in the head. 

“What’s happening?” She asks, her heart in her throat. Fili grabs her arm. 

“I don’t know I—”

“Look out!” Someone cries and then suddenly they're beset on every side by creatures. Cassia thinks they may be Goblins; she isn't sure. They rush at them and grab them from all angles, dozens of hands snatching and grabbing and jostling, and the dwarves go wild.

Cassia and Fili are torn apart and he yells, “Get your hands off her!” grabbing a knife from somewhere and stabbing wildly. He reaches her and grabs her hand and she clings to his arm and from then on, the dwarves barely let the goblins touch her. At one point, Cassia witnesses Bifur bite a grotesque arm reaching for her. They're hustled along caverns and wooden walkways, and it's all Fili can do to keep hold of her. She can say with certainty that she has never been more frightened in her life, she feels near tears the whole time. She has no idea what’s going to happen, no sense of what is going on even, it’s just dwarves yelling and goblins screeching, and she clings to Fili as hard as she can. 

They're ushered out into a platform and Cassia is hidden away in the midst of the dwarves. Bofur takes off his hat and pushes it low on her head and makes a ‘shh’ motion. Fili and Kili are in front of her, hiding her with their bodies, and she’s glad of it. Even Thorin steps in front of her and easily draws any eyes away from her, being much more noticeable.

Sitting before them on a massive chair is the hugest, fattest, most grotesque being she has ever laid eyes on. It's (his?) skin is mottled yellow and covered in sores and leaking pus. Stringy hair hangs around its face and a crown of bones rests upon its brow. He (it?) is singing (although its more like yowling) about torture and crushing and other nasty things. Occasionally, the other goblins join in his song. It’s such a horridly loud noise that Cassia can’t help but to cover her ears. It hurts! 

"Clap, snap, the black crack Grip, grab, pinch, and nab Batter and beat Make ‘em stammer and squeak! Pound pound, far underground Down, down, down in Goblin Town (Down, down, down in Goblin Town)

“With a swish and smack And a whip and a crack Everybody talks when they’re on my rack Pound pound, far underground Down, down, down to Goblin Town (Down, down, down to Goblin Town)

“Hammer and tongs, get out your knockers and gongs You won't last long on the end of my prongs Clash, crash, crush and smash Bang, break, shiver and shake

“You can yammer and yelp But there ain't no help Pound pound, far underground Down, down, down in Goblin...Tooooooooooown

The Goblin King ends his song with a flourish and clambers back up onto his throne, crushing a few of his subjects to use as a stepstool. 

“Catchy, isn't it?” he asks, peering down at them with surprisingly intelligent (if grotesquely pus-filled) eyes, “it's one of my own compositions!”

Cassia frowns and leans towards Fili, attempting a joke through her fear, “it's a little pitchy.” He seems to understand her fright and reaches back, sliding his hand into hers. She clings to it like a lifeline.

“That's not a song,” Balin cries, seeming in agreement with her, “that's an abomination!” The other dwarves agree loudly. It truly is an awful song.

“Abominations!” The great goblin says, “mutations, deviations… That’s all you’re gonna find down here.” He spreads his arms to indicate the vast, tiered city. The walls of the cavern really are absolutely teeming with his kind. Cassia tightens her hold on Fili’s hand.

Just then, a few goblins elbow their way through the crowd and drop the Company’s weapons at his feet. Cassia can’t help but feel a little indignant at the sight of her sword resting on the top of the pile. The goblin’s have no right to it!

“Who would be so bold as to come armed into my Kingdom? Spies? Thieves? Assassins?!” The Goblin King scrambles out of his throne again, loaming huge above them. Cassia tries to be inconspicuous. 

“Dwarves, your malevolence,” one of the beasts says. “We found them on the front porch.”

“Dwarves?! Well, don't just stand there! Search them! Every crack, every crevice!”

The goblins take to the task with enthusiasm, and hands are suddenly all over Cassia, touching her in places she very much does not like. “Hands off!!!” She yelps, catching one in the gut with her foot and crossing her arms over her chest.

“Don't touch her!!!” Fili roars, striking out. The other dwarves fight the goblins off from her, bloodying noses and cracking a few limbs, but the Goblin King reaches over their heads, grabs her by the back of the shirt and hoists her into the air.

“Cassia! No!” Fili shouts, reaching out and missing her by mere centimeters. The other dwarves shout their own protests.

“What's this? Too soft and pale to be a dwarf! What are you?!”

"Let go of her!!!" Fili roars, lunging forward, but he's pounced upon and wrestled back in quick succession.

“I'm a hobbit!” she shouts, wriggling angrily. “Let me go!”

“Hobbit? Never heard of a Hobbit before! Sounds like dwarven lies!”

“I'm not lying! Let go!” She kicks out and catches him in the nose and he roars, throwing her at her companions. Cassia is caught by Bifur and Kili and shoved back into the circle of dwarves, to Fili, who’s fought himself free. He wraps his arms around her protectively. 

“Fili,” she breathes, knowing full well that if he goes into Durin’s Rage down here, he’ll be killed within seconds. “Fili, please stay calm.” She can feel his chest shuddering against her back and she rubs his hands. “Breathe, Fili.”

He takes a deep breath in response, his cheek pressing to the side of her head. His heartbeat is beginning to slow. She also notices Thorin put a steadying hand on Fili’s arm.

“It is my belief,” One of the goblins says, holding up an elven candlestick, “That they are in league with elves!” 

Cassia wonders briefly where in the world that came from. Then she spots Dori giving Nori a withering look. Oh.

The Goblin King grabs the candlestick, turning it this way and that. 

“Made… in… Rivendell,” he reads from the bottom, and scoffs. “Second Age. Couldn’t give it away.” He tosses the candlestick away into the depths of goblin town. 

“It’s just a couple of keepsakes,” Nori says, as if he hasn’t possibly doomed them all. Dori looks like he is going to strangle his younger brother, and Dwalin looks as if he’ll help. 

The Goblin King points at Cassia. “What are you then? Some sort of spawn of an elf and a dwarf? You’re too small to be an elf, and no beard so you cannot be a dwarf! What are you? Speak up!” 

“She doesn’t have to say anything!” Fili shouts, stepping in front of her. The other dwarves shout their agreement. The Goblin King knocks them aside with his scepter, catching Fili a particularly vicious blow in the shoulder.

“No one asked you, dwarf,” he spits. He jabs his scepter at Cassia, who is so angry at the way he’s hit Fili and the fact that he thinks she is some sort of dwarf-elf hybrid (perish the thought!) that she forgets to be scared.

“I’ve already said I’m a hobbit!” She shrieks, putting her fists on her hips and stomping her foot. She shakes her finger at him. “And a perfectly wellbred one at that!”

“There’s no good breeding down here,” the great goblin laughs, “only inbreeding.” He laughs wheezily. “What are you doing in these parts, hobbit?”

Thorin begins to step forward but Oin stops him.

“Don’t worry lads,” the elderly medic says, stepping forward. “I’ll handle this.”

“No tricks!” The Goblin King says. “I want the truth! Warts and all!”

“You’re going to have to speak up,” Oin says, holding up his ear trumpet. “Your boys flattened my trumpet.”

Cassia has the overwhelming urge to giggle at that, even despite her fear. Not because his trumpet is flattened (the poor dwarf can barely hear) but because Oin is perfectly indignant and has the gall to say something about it.

“I’ll flatten more than your trumpet!” The great goblin roars, storming toward them, and Cassia shrieks as the dwarves scramble back.

“If it’s for information you’re wantin’,” Bofur cries out, “I’m the one you should speak to!” 

The Goblin King pauses, and stares at him. “Mhm?”

The dwarf seems alarmed that that had worked and flounders for a few moments. Then, he rallies. “We were on the road. Well, it’s not so much a road as a path. Actually it's not even that, come to think of it. It’s more like a track. Anyway, the point is, we were on this road like a path like a track… and then we weren’t! Which is a problem because we were supposed to be in Dunland last Tuesday…” He looks back at the others, and Dori leaps to his rescue.

“Visiting distant relations!” He puts in.

Bofur nods, running with that. “Some inbreds on my mother’s side—”

“SHUT UP!!!!!” The Goblin King howls. His subjects cower, allowing Fili to scramble back to Cassia’s side, and Bofur shuts his mouth with a clop.

“If they will not talk,” the goblin says, “we'll make them squawk! Bring up the Mangler! Bring up the Bonebreaker! Start with the hobbit!” 

Cassia goes very, very still. 

"No!" Fili shouts, surging forward. 

“Fili, no!” Cassia screams as Bifur and Kili are thrown out of the way when they try to grab him and hold him back. The goblins stop him and slam his face to the ground viciously, and Fili goes limp, clearly dazed. She gasps. "Fili!"

“Wait!” Thorin says, stepping forward.

“Well, well, well,” the Goblin King jeers, quickly losing interest in Cassia, “look who it is! Thorin, son of Thrain, son of Thrór, King Under The Mountain.” he bows mockingly. “But wait! You don't have a Mountain, do you? And you're not a King, which makes you no one, really.”

Thorin raises his chin proudly. Cassia can practically feel the rage pouring off him as she kneels next to Fili. The blonde dwarf groans and tries to get his arms underneath him. 

“You need to calm down,” Kili hisses to his older brother, hauling him upright. Fili grunts, wiping at his bleeding nose. Cassia stands and presses close to them. “I’m serious,” Kili continues. “Aren’t you meant to be the levelheaded one?”

“I know someone who would pay a pretty price for your head,” the Goblin King continues to Thorin, “just the head. Nothing attached. Perhaps you know of who I speak? An old enemy of yours. A Pale Orc. Astride a white warg.”

Thorin finally speaks. The idea of his old enemy still living is enough to begin to crack his shell. His voice trembles a little with barely concealed rage.

“Azog the Defiler was destroyed,” Thorin spits. “He was slain in battle long ago.” 

“So you think his Defiling days are done, do you?” The Goblin King says mockingly. He turns to one of his subjects. “Send word to the Pale Orc. Tell him I have found his prize.” As the goblin skitters off, he turns back to the Company. “Now then. We only need the one dwarf,” He surveys them with a grotesque grin. “So let’s have some fun.”

Cassia hears clattering and scraping behind them, and out of the corner of her eye sees a whole lot of great, nasty-looking contraptions brought up, machines whose uses she can only guess at, and all the guesses are awful. 

The Goblin King surveys them again, and his eyes land on Fili, who looks rather worse for wear, blood staining his mustache. Cassia’s heart lurches. “What about this blond one? He looks fun, eh Oakenshield?” Horror sweeps over Thorin’s face, just briefly, but the great goblin spots it. “What’s this? Is this dwarf special to you? A son?” Thorin clams up again, and Fili bears his teeth, refusing to be afraid. “No,” the Goblin King continues, “Not a son. He doesn’t look similar enough. A nephew, maybe?” Cassia doesn’t see what Thorin does, but it’s met with a slow grin. “Ah! Hit the nail on the head, have I?” The gigantic goblin throws his head back in a laugh. Fili is dragged forward, despite the struggling of the dwarves, his hand torn away from Cassia. 

“Kili!” Fili cries frantically, “Don’t let Cassia—” He’s silenced by a blow to the head, but his brother gets the idea, grabbing the lass and pulling her back. Cassia feels sick. She’s convinced she’s about to see the person she loves be tortured...

But then, all of a sudden several goblins cry out and Orcrist is thrown to the ground, partly unsheathed.That is what saves Fili.

But ultimately dooms them all...

The Goblin King rears back, clambering on to his throne. “I know that sword!” He cries, “it is the Goblin-Cleaver! The Biter! The Blade That Sliced A Thousand Necks! Slash them! Beat them! Kill them! Kill them all!”

Cassia gasps, only able to watch as Thorin is being wrestled to the ground. There’s nothing she can do, since she really can’t fight at all, and all the dwarves are as beset as she is, kicking and screaming, she's grappled to the ground, and she’s terrified and convinced she’s going to die. She can barely breathe from the weight of the goblins on top of her, when suddenly, blessedly, it’s gone.

“Mizimelûh!” someone shouts, and Cassia, though she doesn’t know the dwarvish word, knows it is directed at her. She rolls over and sees Fili for a brief moment, before he’s dragged down again. “Run!” he roars. 

And then, there's a great white light and a force that's like a thousand raging winds and they are all blown back and to the ground. Cassia is one of the first to recover, having been on the ground already, and she sits up slowly, brushing her hair out of her face.

Gandalf emerges from the darkness, and she has never seen a more beautiful sight.

“Take up arms!” The wizard commands. “Fight. Fight!”

There's the clattering of weapons and shouting of dwarves and Fili drops to his knees beside her. He smooths her hair off her face. 

“Are you hurt?"  he asks, looking her up and down. Cassia shakes her head. Her breath is coming is harsh, terrified pants and she grabs on to him and doesn’t let go. He hugs her tightly, then drags her to her feet.

"Don't let go of me!” He instructs, snatching her sword out of the air as it's thrown towards them and handing it to her. “Understand?”

She nods, holding his hand tightly, and the next thing she knows, they’re running. Cassia doesn’t really remember what happens, except from time to time she is passed from dwarf to dwarf. The goblins are trying their damndest to stop them, and Cassia is very glad of her sword and Fili’s fighting lessons, and even manages to cut off a few hands and fingers as they run, although most of the goblins are thrown out of her way by the others.

They all burst out of the more winding places and onto a bridge and suddenly the Goblin King explodes from the bridge to stand before them, blocking their path. The rest of his subjects swarm up behind them, covering their escape from that direction, too. 

Fili pushes Cassia behind him, his arm in front of her protectively, Kili at her back, so she’s sandwiched between them. 

“You thought you could escape me?” The Goblin King jeers, and swings his scepter at Gandalf. Cassia yelps as the wizard falls back, caught by Ori and Nori.

“What are you going to do now, wizard?”

Gandalf surges forward and jabs the Goblin King in the face with his staff and slices him open with Glamdring.

“That'll do it,” the monster says. Gandalf cuts his throat. 

Then, the whole bridge crumbles and the bottom of the world just seems to fall away. Cassia’s stomach is in her throat and she screams, grabbing on to Fili. He pulls her against his side as the bridge (miraculously intact) slides down the rocks as if it were a gigantic sled. Only much, much more dangerous. 

Down, down, down they careen through the canyon, occasionally catching and skittering on rocks and in tight places. Cassia is quite glad she isn’t the only one yelling.

Their descent stutters as the ends of their makeshift sled catches between the sides of the cavern, and then they hit the ground with a jarring thud that has Cassia’s teeth rattling around in her skull and the wooden bridge finally falling to pieces.

She is spared from being hit by most of the debris by Fili's body, thankfully, as he covers her head with his arms. 

Gandalf reaches in and lifts her out by the back of the shirt (rather like the Goblin King had, only much gentler) as easily as if she had been a small animal. 

“Well,” Bofur says, “that could have been worse!”

The Goblin King's corpse lands atop the dwarves, immediately proving him wrong, and they all cry out.

In the brief moment of peace they have, Cassia realizes something horrible. She looks around frantically as her companions scramble slowly out from the rubble, her heart in her throat, but the person she is looking for is nowhere to be found. 

"Where's my brother?" She asks Fili, who has come over to her.

"What?" He queries. She opens her mouth to repeat herself, but is interrupted.

"Gandalf!" Kili yells, pointing up the way they had come. Hundreds of goblins are swarming down toward them. 

“There’s too many of them!” Dwalin shouts, dragging Nori to his feet. “We can’t fight them!”

"Only one thing can save us now!” The wizard says. “Daylight. Run!”

Fili grabs Cassia’s arm, dragging her along. "Come on!"

"Fili!" She cries, pulling back, "Where's my brother?! Where's Bilbo!" She can’t leave without Bilbo!

"Cassia!" He shouts. "We don't have time for this!"

"But—" 

Fili scoops her up and throws her over his shoulder. 

"Put me down!" She shrieks, punching his shoulder, "put me down, you beast! Let me go!" But she is tiny and her fists are next to useless against his back. Fili just tightens his iron grip around her legs, and runs. She can't do anything but scream at him. 

.

Finally, he lowers her back to the ground. They're out in the sunlight, now, goblins left far behind. As soon as he lets go of her, she whirls on him and shoves him. He doesn't even budge, because he is solid and strong, like a mountain. "How could you do that?!" She screams at him. "I hate you!" She doesn't, really, because she could never feel anything but love for him, but he still looks stricken. 

"Cassia, I—"

"Shut up!" She screams at him, punching his chest. "Shut up!!! I told you he was missing and you made me leave him behind! I hate you!"

"Miss Baggins!" Gandalf says, "Cassia! Whatever is the matter?”

"We left Bilbo behind!" She wails to him. 

There is an instant uproar.

"Where is he!" Gandalf shouts, "where is Bilbo?!"

"I thought he was with Dori!" Someone shouts.

"Now don't blame this on me!"

"I saw him slip away when they first collared us!" Nori cries.

“Well, what happened exactly?” Gandalf commands, “Tell me!”

"We left him behind," Cassia sobs, her tears coming hard and fast now, "and I tried to say something but Fili carried me off!" She whirls back on him. "I hate you! I'll never forgive you!"

"Cassia—" he tries again.

"You could've gotten killed!" Kili interjects.

"I don't care!" She screams at him, "he's my brother! Wouldn't you do the same?!" Kili has no words, because of course he would. 

“I’ll tell you what happened,” Thorin snarls, and Cassia is quite sure she’s going to hate him for whatever will come out of his mouth next. “Master Baggins saw his chance and he took it. He has thought of nothing but his soft bed and his warm hearth since first he stepped out of his door. We will not be seeing our hobbit again. He is long gone.”

She gasps indignantly. Her brother is missing, possibly dead, and all Thorin cares about is that fact that he may have run off?! “Shut your mouth!” Cassia shrieks. Shockingly, Thorin does, his eyebrows raising. “He wouldn’t do that! He’s not like that!” She steps forward toward Thorin, and Fili grabs her around the waist. It’s a good thing, too, because she is in such a state of rage that she would undoubtedly have slapped the dwarf king if she had reached him. “He’s come all this way to help you! We both have! And all you’ve done is be horribly rude and awful toward him. If he did run off, it’s because you drove him away, you absolute—”

She doesn’t have a chance to finish her insult, though, because, oh joy of joys, her brother’s voice rings out. 

“No one’s driven anyone off!”

They all turn. Bilbo is standing just behind them all, looking a bit scratched up (they all do), but alive. Cassia screams. 

“Bilbo!” 

Fili lets her go and she throws herself at her brother, arms around his neck, face in his shoulder. Bilbo stumbles a little, but hugs her back. She can hear the dwarves making little relieved noises at the fact that he is alive and well. “I thought we’d left you back there,” Cassia sobs. "I thought you were dead!"

“I know,” he mumbles. “But you didn’t. I’m perfectly fine!"

“We’d given you up!” Kili cries, relief clear in his voice.

“How on earth did you get past the goblins?” Fili queries. Cassia pulls back from Bilbo. That is a very good question. 

“Bilbo?” she asks. 

Her brother flounders for a moment, before Gandalf speaks up. “Well,” the wizard says, “what does it matter? He’s back!”

“It matters,” Thorin declares, eying Bilbo suspiciously. “I want to know. Why did you come back? Was it just for your sister?”

Cassia finds herself frowning. As angry as she still is with the dwarf king, he does have a point. Bilbo had seemed quite ready to up and leave immediately after the giants, and ready enough to drag her with him. Perhaps he still means to leave, but was unable to without her. She peers at Bilbo. He sighs. 

“Part of it was for Cassia. She’s my sister. I can’t abandon her. And… and I know you doubt me. I know you always have.” He glances around at the other dwarves. “And you’re right. I often think of Bag End.” He shrugs. “I miss my books. And my armchair. And my bed. See, that’s where I belong. That’s home. And that’s why I came back. Because… you don’t have one. A home. It was taken from you. But I will help you take it back, if I can.”

There is a silence, and no one says anything, waiting for Thorin, who just looks at Bilbo for a long time. Then, to everyone's surprise, he nods his head to Bilbo, in a sign of thanks, and perhaps a little bit of respect. The relief that washes over the Company is palpable. But it doesn't last for long.

All of a sudden, from up the mountain, there comes the far too familiar howling of wargs. Cassia’s heart leaps in her throat. Not again! Not now!

“Out of the frying pan,” Thorin mumbles. 

“And into the fire,” Gandalf finishes. “Run. Run!”

[mypassionfortrash]

KICKS (part 8)

You and Roger finally give in to your feelings, but it doesn’t end as well as you had hoped. 

WARNINGS: Smut. NOTES: Thanks for sticking with this one – it means a lot. Sorry it’s late and really short. I’m just feeling a bit uninspired to write right now.

CATCH UP: Part one // Part two // Part three // Part four // Part five // Part six // Part seven

TAGS: @jennyggggrrr​​ @sarahgurl09​​ @scorpiogemini @johnricharddeacy​​​ @brianssixpence​​ @hellohellothere12 @crazylittlethingcalledobsession @internationalkpoplova @thefairyfellersmasterstroke @six-bloodyminutes @hannafuckingsucks​​ @dancingcoolcat​​ @cherries-n-rocknroll​​ ​ @inthelapofrogertaylor​​ @80s-roger​​ @just-my-sickly-pride​​ @yourlocalmusicalprostitute​​ @johndeaconshands​​ @loveandbeloved29​​ @toreyyyyyy @fallingprincess​​ @radiob-l-a-hblah @wineandwanderings​

Roger moved swiftly. The weight of him almost sent you flying backwards as your lips collided for the very first time. Picture perfect and just like something from a film, sparks flew inside you. Between you. Everywhere.

You clung to him. Moved with him. In a delirious push and pull. Hands in hair. Trailing down each others’ bodies. Eventually, your fingers snagged in his belt loops in a futile attempt at stability. Roger well and truly made up for lost time. He grabbed your hips and gripped your thighs. Dragged his hands all the way up your body and clawed his fingers through your hair.

It felt like a delicious eternity before Roger broke away with his pink lips parted ever so slightly. “I can’t believe this is happening,” he giggled, trying to draw in a breath. 

And then your eyes shot open. A fistful of Roger’s t-shirt in your hand, just about to tear it off. “What time is it?”

Roger slowly removed himself from you. His features dropped in disappointment.

Your heart felt like it had burrowed right to the bottom of your stomach. “Sorry… work,” you explained. 

Roger nodded and held his wrist up high enough that he could just about make out the dials. “Half eight,” he said. “Do you still want to–“

Before he could finish that sentence, your lips were glued to his again. Hopping off the work bench, you walked Roger back across the entire width of his garage. Your hands roamed every step of the way. Until you reached the Aston Martin, tucked away on the far side.

Roger gave a few playful nips at your neck. “You like the expensive ones?” he grinned.

Putting on your best doe eyes, you fluttered your lashes and sat back on the hood. “I’ve always wanted someone to fuck me on the bonnet of a pretty car if that’s what you mean. And you had better get a move on.”

Roger bit his lip and tugged down his zipper. “Fortunately for you, this one goes pretty fast.”

You lay back and spread your thighs for Roger. His breathing hitched just watching you run your fingers over the damp spot on your knickers. Just waiting for him to make the first move.

“Fuck,” he sighed, throwing himself at you. One hand tugged your underwear aside, the other grabbed the back of your neck, keeping you nose to nose with him. “You really don’t fuck around.”

You gasped at the feeling of his fingers – unrestrained and eager to please – exploring every slick, damp fold. And then he found your clit. Circle after circle felt like lightning and forced you to bury your face in the crook of Roger’s neck. God, he smelled incredible. Smoke and petrol and a hint of sweat. You could have stayed like that forever. But Roger had other plans for you.

His other hand gently guided your head back. He paused, gazing down at you. “Are you sure you’re ok with this?” 

Why did he have to do that? A pang of disappointment burned though your body. You needed him to keep going.

Roger pressed his forehead to yours. “I’m being serious here.”

“Yes, please,” you said. You grabbed his hand to try and make it move again. “Just keep doing this while you fuck me.”

Roger’s free hand wrapped around the shaft of his cock. Thick, veined and throbbing.

You looked down in awe as inch by inch Roger sank inside you while his thumb continued to tease you. Everything else in the room felt like it was spinning. 

“Feel ok?” he asked, kissing the tip of your nose.

You kissed him back and nodded.

“Lie back for me.”

Easing yourself back, you wrapped your thighs around Roger’s body. He started slow, so slow that you felt every vein, every ridge. Every time his cock brushed against that sweet spot inside you. 

You felt incredible; trembling and squeezing around Roger’s cock. So much so that he couldn’t stand up straight while he fucked you, or even focus on rubbing your clit any longer. He planted his hands on either side of your head and hunched over you, speeding up. His chest pressed against your own. “You like that?” he groaned, clawing at the expensive green paintwork.

“Yes,” you hissed. You couldn’t stop your hands from wandering between your thighs or grabbing his hair. When you were on the verge of truly sinking into another headspace, blocking everything else out, Roger took control again.

First you felt your toes touch the cold, hard concrete. Then being spun around. Soon enough you were face down, panting against the hood of his car. One leg propped up on the bumper. Roger’s fingers dug into your hips so tight that you were certain they’d leave a bruise. Every sound reverberated right to the rafters in the garage. Heated moans, and the echo of every sloppy, purposeful thrust. Delirium wasn’t far off. You could feel it building. 

He was getting close too. You could tell by the way his teeth bore into the spot between your neck and your shoulder with a muffled, guttural growl. No words needed. He needed this as much as you did. 

Towards the end, something snapped. You stared at your fogged up reflection as Roger finished inside you. But you just couldn’t let go.

He hadn’t even caught his breath or tucked his cock back in his jeans before you were back on your feet, keen to get back into the house to clean yourself up and get to work. He raked his fingers through his hair and squinted at you in the orange glow from the heater. “Did you…finish?”

You shook your head, and smoothed Roger’s shirt over your thighs. “I really should…” you trailed off, jabbing your thumb towards the house behind you. “…get ready. Work and everything.”

Roger held up his hands and took a step back. He seemed to understand.

You had only just stepped outside into the brisk morning when you peeked back over your shoulder. He stood there in the garage with his arms folded, watching you. He wore a bittersweet smile. You turned to him. “See you later?” you shrugged.

A glimmer of light returned to Roger’s big, sad eyes. “Sounds good.”

There was no other way to look at things. If Roger stopped tinkering with the Range Rover, then he would have been rallying the Aston Martin into town. But he didn’t want to look desperate. He didn’t want to take a mile when you had only just given him an inch. So he spent hours under the hood. Doing far more harm to his runaround than good. Poking at every detail of the last 24 hours in his head. 

But he couldn’t get over how soon you left.

Had he gone too far? Too rough? Did he say something?

When faced with a problem he couldn’t solve, Roger’s rage reared its ugly head. Fortunately, that only amounted to hurling a spanner across the garage when his brain couldn’t handle any more.

Wiping his hands with a rag, he called it a day in the garage. 

Thoughts of you lingered on him like your scent on his t-shirt, he couldn’t resist pressing it to his nose as he waited for the water in the shower to heat up. He needed to wash away the grime and reason his way out of this one; every stroke of his hand over his body made him burn with need and desire. Lathering the soap into his arms. Down his chest. His abdomen. His fingers curled through the wisps of hair down towards his half-erect cock.

Roger’s body felt heavy, burdened with need as he leaned against the wall. His mouth dropped open with a reserved groan when he thought back to fucking you in the garage. How touching you felt just like a religious experience; not that he believed in those. It was as close he’d get to one. His hand gripped his shaft tighter, trying to remember just how tight you felt and how you moaned for him. The scent of your hair. He screwed his eyes shut and tilted his head back, trying to paint as vivid a picture as he could. But the details were too fuzzy. All he knew for sure was that he wanted you even more now.

----------------------------------------------------------------

FRIENDLY REMINDER: you’ve made it this far! Congratulations! Please, if you enjoyed reading this fic, reblog it.

You spent 20 minutes reading this for free. I spent a lot more time writing this... for nothing but the hope that you’ll share this and leave some feedback. I love writing fanfiction, but it’s really demoralising to rarely get feedback, and for tumblr’s algorithm to bury posts because no one shares them. And honestly, I don’t want to guilt you, but I’m kind of close to quitting sharing my writing on here because of it.

SO PLEASE, SUPPORT WRITERS. REBLOG FICS (EVEN IF YOU DON’T THINK YOU HAVE A LOT OF FOLLOWERS)! LEAVE FEEDBACK (EVEN JUST A KEY SMASH, DON’T BE SHY)! I’D REALLY APPRECIATE IT AND I’M SURE OTHER AUTHORS WOULD, TOO!

[softboywriting]

Baths Together | Shawn Mendes

Summary: You and Shawn take your first bath together. [fluff] [aspec reader - non specific]

Word Count: 1.4k

|Masterlist In Bio|

"Do you like baths?" Shawn asks out of the blue one day. The two of you have just hanging out in his hotel room for a while, not having made plans for the day. You've been on tour with him since summer started and the preschool you work for is out of session. Usually you would find a summer job or work with your aunt at her hotel and clean for her. But this year Shawn begged you to come with him and you let him talk you into it.

"Baths? Yeah?"

"Would you like to take one with me? It's been a stressful few days and I thought maybe we could do something to unwind."

You raise your eyebrows. "You sure you're okay with it?"

"Are you?"

"Yeah? Why wouldn't I be?"

Shawn shrugs. "It's really intimate, I just didn't know if you were comfortable with that yet."

You get up and grab his hands, hauling him up off the bed. "I don't mind intimacy. You know that."

"But we'll be naked."

"And? We've been naked together before."

"That was just sleeping and it was hot in the hotel that night." He follows you into the bathroom and you shake your head at him. "What?"

"Being naked isn't necessarily sexual."

"But-"

You pull your shirt off over your head. "Is it sexual when someone models for an art class?"

"No."

"Is it sexual when you change in the locker room or backstage?"

Shawn chuckles and shakes his head. "No, definitely not."

You kick your jeans aside and reach over the huge tub and turn on the water. "So you get my point?"

"I think so." He peels off his clothes and stands next to you in his boxers. "What if I get hard or something?"

"So?" You laugh, unclasping your bra and tossing it aside. "You're probably going to get hard a lot during our relationship. You'll see that sharing a bath doesn't have to be intimate the way you think it is."

"Yeah." Shawn pushes his boxers down and you take off your underwear. "I'm sorry in advance though."

You shake your head. "No need to be sorry." You step into the water and pour in some bubble bath that fills the tub with fluffy white clusters of foam.

Shawn gets in front of you so you're facing each other. After much adjusting, your legs are over Shawn's and his feet are bracketing your sides in the water. The bubbles fill the space between the two of you and covers everything from your chest up. Shawn reclines in the tub and rests his head on the curved back.

"So…" You run your hands up and down his calves. "How's tour?" You ask with a giggle.

"Well, I get to play huge arenas every other night, and I get to hang out with my best friends every day." He looks at you with a smile, playing along with your little game. "I also get to wake up everyday and share my dream with the most incredible woman I've ever met."

"Oh yeah?"  

"Mmhmm." He chuckles. "She's amazing and beautiful. I love her so much."

You splash at him and he sits up right. "You're so sappy!"

"Oh you love it." He leans forward and kisses your nose. "Can I wash you?"

"Sure." You scoot closer and so does Shawn so you're almost in his lap.

Shawn reaches over and grabs a bath puff and soaks it in the water. He washes your shoulders and your arms before going over your chest, stopping at your stomach. "You're good?"

"Great. I can turn around so you can do my back."

"Yeah."

You stand and turn around, lowering yourself with his help as you sit between his legs. He runs his hands over your shoulders and kisses the back of your neck.

"I didn't know you had freckles on your shoulders." He says as he brings the puff up and rubs over your skin in gentle circles.

"I do?" You try to look back but it's no use. "I guess I never noticed."

"They're really light, and they're small and cute."

"Thanks," you giggle.

Shawn rinses your back and runs one hand through your hair. "Can I wash this too?"

"I'd love for you to."

He has you lean back and soak your hair as best you can. The rest he gets by cupping water in his hands and pouring it over your hair. You hear the click of the shampoo bottle and his hands go to your hair. It feels amazing. His fingers massage and work tenderly against your scalp in a slow rhythm. You could sit here forever.

"Are you enjoying it?"

"Mmm."

"You're just so quiet I wasn't sure."

"Stop worrying so much." You lean your head back so he can get the top of your head really well. "I'll tell you if I don't like something."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

Shawn washes your hair slowly, taking his time running his hands through the soapy mess. He helps you rinse by leaning back and shaking it out in the water, careful not to get too many bubbles in it on your way up. He wraps his arms around you once you're rinsed and pulls you back against his chest.

You lay against him, head on his shoulder. "This is nice."

"Mmhmm. I'm glad I suggested it." He twists a stray bit of hair around his finger. "I never would have learned that you have shoulder freckles and I've never washed someone's hair before. That was fun."

"Really?" You lift your hand up and run it over his dark curls, leaving a trail of bubbles. "Have you ever had your hair washed before?"

"Nope."

"I'm going to change that." You sit up and crawl out of the tub. "Scoot forward, I'm going to wash your hair."

Shawn looks up at you and you shoo him forward with your hands. He shifts to the front of the tub so you can get in behind him. You sit down and run your hands up his back. It is your favorite part of him, well maybe not. His arms were to die for, oh and his legs were so nice. Okay. Okay everything about Shawn is your favorite. You slide your fingertips over the taut muscles and slightly tanned skin. He has a pale birthmark right behind his neck, about the size of your palm. It's cute and you lean forward to kiss it.

"Hey," he chuckles, rubbing your feet where they sit along his legs. "I thought you were washing my hair."

"I'm enjoying you first." You wrap your arms around him and press your chest to his back. "If you don't mind."

"Of course I don't mind." He runs his short nails over your legs. "I love attention from you."

"Good." You give his back another kiss and cup your hands to pour water over his head. It doesn't work very well and you lose most of it before you reach the top. "Lean back for me."

Shawn shifts forward and leans back. His head just hits your chest he's so big. "Is this okay? I don't think I can go much farther."

"This is perfect." You lean down and kiss him quickly. "I can make it work." You scoop the water up and pour it from his forehead back. A slow smile spreads across his face and he goes limp against you, totally relaxed.

"This is the best thing I've ever experienced."

"Wait until I wash it." You finish wetting his hair and have him sit up as you prepare the shampoo. The moment you start to lather up his hair and massage his scalp he's a goner. He's putty in your hands. As you finish and help him rinse he just lays back against you and you run your hands up and down his chest. He looks completely blissed out, in another world entirely. "I think I get it now."

"Get what?"

"The non sexual intimacy of this. This is wonderful and I feel so close to you and just free and trusting." He chuckles and looks up at you. "It's way better then sex."

"Glad to hear it." You lean down and kiss him softly. You sit back and sink down lower and let his weight squish you in the warm water. "Let's relax a while longer, then see about going out?"

"I'd love to stay in here all day if you would."

"Mmm, we'd be prunes. Better not."

"How about the bed then?"

"Bed it is." You kiss his head and he relaxes once again. Moments like this are what you live for. You never thought you'd get to have them before you met Shawn. But here you are and you couldn't be happier.

------

A/N: Thank you so so much for reading :) -A

Please Reblog :)

*****Note: none of my works should be posted anywhere outside of my linked accounts. I do not give permission to repost with or without credit to my accounts. Please notify me of any reposted fics.*****

[doing-all-write]

i’m open

The one in which reader goes to Ben’s soccer game. Fluff and romance ABOUNDS. 

Warning: mentions of sex and swearing. And major fluff. Like, so much fluff this thing is made of cotton candy and unicorn wishes. 

It’s been so beautiful here and I was watching soccer on tv and really wishing for a soccer playing boyfriend and this is what happened. Hope you enjoy! 

Comments, reblogs and likes are always appreciated! 

"I'M OPEN!" 

Ben's eyes briefly flicked away from the ball as he heard his teammate, Tim, yell. He brought his foot back and kicked the ball as hard as he could toward him.

Tim kept running, keeping the ball caged within his feet the whole time. Keeping an eye on him, Ben, the rest of the players on the field and the whole audience, watched, with bated breath as Tim kicked it toward the goal. 

The goalie's thighs tensed and uncoiled as they pushed themselves toward the right, hands splayed trying to prevent the ball from getting into the net. 

Time seemed to slow down as the ball sailed over the goalies hands, he could feel the ball brush past his fingertips as it slipped over them and landed against the netting of the goal as he collapsed on the ground, head hung, as cheers erupted. 

"YEAH!" Ben threw his arms into the air as he raced over to join the giant dog pile that was getting dangerously close to crushing Tim beneath their excitement.  

The bleachers shook under her feet as she jumped up and down, clapping and yelling. She laughed as she watched Ben fling his body on top of the dog pile. She tilted her head up and was greeted by October sunshine that seemed especially brilliant against the cloudless blue sky and the celebration happening around her.

The sun had done nothing to warm her though, the wind buffeting around her and the other spectators doing everything it could to whisk away any bit of warmth the sun might offer. But after moving around she felt herself warming up and judging by the players on the field un-sticking jerseys from bodies, they had worked up a sweat despite the cooler temperature. 

She blew on her fingertips, exposed to the chill in the air because of her finger-less gloves, which she knew Ben would give her endless shit for when he saw them. ("Wouldn't it make more sense to buy gloves that actually covered your whole hand, love?" "It's not about staying warm, it's about the aesthetic" "Well quit trying to warm up your aesthetically pleasing fingers on my sides") 

Biting back a smile, she accepted praise from the other significant others and family members that lined the side of the pitch every weekend to watch the team play. As she hugged Tim's boyfriend, she saw out of the corner of her eye Ben's team finally disentangling themselves from each other to shake hands with the defeated team.  

She loved the community the sidelines had built. When she first showed up, she was worried it would be difficult to get to know the others, but everyone was incredibly welcoming and the atmosphere was always cheerful, even when the team was losing. A couple times, she had brought pom-poms to pass out to willing individuals and they shook them and came up with silly cheers to keep spirits high. 

Her eyes tracked Ben as he made his way down the line of players. Even from a distance, she could tell that Ben was feeling immensely proud of himself. He was doing his best to be gracious but from the swagger of his step she could tell he was in the same mood as when they emerged from a bar bathroom after hooking up; cocky and failing to hide it.   

As Tim's boyfriend (Kyle she remembered a second too late was his name) talked ad nauseum about how Tim had turned leg day into leg week just in case this exact situation were to happen, she just nodded and made noises of agreement in all the right places but was mainly focused on looking at Ben.

As Kyle gave her one final hug and bounded down the bleachers to go congratulate his boyfriend, she saw Ben, talking to another player who was wildly gesticulating as they recounted a particularly epic shot they had. She saw his blue eyes darting around every now and again. He was nodding and to any other individual it would seem he was listening intently. But she knew better. She knew he was looking for her. 

She raised her hand and waved to grab his attention. His eyes locked onto the movement and a smile broke across his face, like the sun appearing from behind clouds. 

Without any explanation to the teammate he was talking to, he slapped them on the shoulder and jogged over to where she was, leaving them dumbfounded that someone could leave in the middle of such a great story. 

Her smile grew bigger as she carefully stepped down from her spot on the bleachers to meet him. She landed on the last metallic step before the ground and looked up to find herself eye level with Ben's gaze.

"Hello, beautiful." He smiled even wider as her pink cheeks grew even pinker at the compliment.

"Hi, yourself." She muttered back as she found herself smiling wider at the flushed boy before her. 

"So? What did you think?" He asked as he held out his hands, palms up to her. She glanced down and laid her own hands on top of his as she giggled, 

"It was the best soccer game I've ever been to."

Ben rolled his eyes, "It's football. Honestly. You'd think you'd have learned that by now."

Her mouth dropped open in mock outrage, "Hey! I am trying my best here! You're lucky I even showed up at all!" 

Ben chuckled as he cupped her cheek with his palm, "You're right. I'm a lucky bastard to have my beautiful girlfriend come support me on the football pitch." He placed extra emphasis on the last two words, his eyes dancing with mirth as she bit a laugh back. 

"I'll forgive you this once for being a dick-sorry a prick- because you told me I'm beautiful."

"Oh so you can't remember the correct term for football but the correct term for dick you've got that one down cold, huh?" He reached a hand down to tickle her side as she laughed and tried to squirm away from him.

"I have way more reason to use prick than I do football! Stop tickling me!" She whined as she tried to get away from Ben's fingers. 

Ben just chuckled and grabbed onto her waist firmly, "That's no way to speak to someone who just scored a game winning goal."

She widened her eyes innocently, "Well, technically you didn't score the game winning goal, Tim did."

Ben arched an eyebrow at her, "I'm going to start tickling you again if you don't take that back right this second."

She pouted, "Why are you so mean?"

Ben reached a finger up and tapped her bottom lip, "You know when you do that I just want to kiss you more, is that why you do it?"

Her face flushed crimson as she pulled her chin down and gazed at her feet, encased in the combat boots she had been wearing for the past three winters. Ben always made fun of her when she wore them because he could hear her coming from a mile away. They were heavy and made a satisfying stomping noise with each step. She had primly replied that she wore them so people would know not to mess with her because she was so tough.  

(At which point Ben had looked her up and down and pointed out that a woman wearing a shirt with Smokey the Bear on it probably wouldn't intimidate anyone but forest fires. She had walked away with her middle finger held high.)

"Maybe" she muttered as she peeked up at Ben through her eyelashes. His eyes sparkled as he gently tipped her chin up and laid a gentle kiss on her lips. 

As he pulled away, they were both beaming at each other, enjoying the late autumn sun and each other's presence when a piercing voice cut through the moment, 

"OI! Get a room you two lovesick idiots!" Tim cracked as he gave Ben's shoulder a shove as he jogged past, holding Kyle's hand. 

She clapped her hands over her face as her shoulders shook with laughter and Ben cheerfully flipped Tim off and yelled, "Fuck you too, you insufferable bugger!" 

Tim laughed and waved at both of them as he and Kyle jogged to their car. 

She peeked at Ben through her fingers, "Why are your friends so embarrassing?" 

Ben laughed and threaded his arms around her waist, "Not sure, love. But at least they always keep us on our toes, right?" He kissed the tip of her nose as she put her hands on his chest,

"Ugh, keep your distance Jonesy. You're a sweaty boy." She wrinkled her nose at him as he smirked at her. 

"You really shouldn't have said anything" he said as he pulled her flush against his body as she shrieked with laughter, "BEN! Put me DOWN!" 

He laughed as he lifted her up and spun her around as she flung her head back and laughed. He gently set her back down on the ground as he squeezed his arms tighter around her waist, "Alright, I put you down. But I'm still going to get as much sweat as possible on you." 

She squirmed against him as she tried her best to disentangle herself from his embrace, "This sucks Ben, how dare you be so strong and muscular?" She wheezed as she pushed against the brick wall that was his chest. 

She finally huffed out a breath and went limp as Ben did everything possible to rub as much of his sweat off on her, "Usually your muscles are a huge turn on but right now I kind of hate them?"

Ben stilled and stared down at her incredulously, "You can't possibly mean that?"

She rolled her eyes, "Of course not. I just wanted to distract you." She pushed away from Ben and took a few steps away from him, shaking herself off in a futile attempt to try to rid herself of the smell of sweaty man.

"How can you be so hot but smell so terrible?"

Ben pointed a menacing finger at her, "Think very carefully before insulting me again. I'll rub your face in my armpit."

She gasped, "You wouldn't."

Ben shrugged his shoulders, "Maybe I would, maybe I wouldn't but do you really want to take that chance?"

She crossed her arms and mumbled, "I guess not." She looked up into Ben's eyes and couldn't help the smile taking over her face. She looked around and noticed the whole team had cleared out. It was only her, Ben and a few families taking their kids to the playground for one final play session outside before snow and ice covered everything. 

Ben studied her. Her silhouette illuminated by the autumn sun shining down, the leaves falling around her, he was struck with the same realization he had whenever he got a chance to look at her; he was incredibly in love with her.

Her eyes slid over to meet Ben's and saw him studying her, arms crossed over his chest. His gaze was intense and caused heat to build in her core as she glanced down and saw the soccer ball next to her boot. She rested her foot on it and glanced at Ben, "Teach me how to play?" 

He shook himself from his thoughts, "What? Teach you how to play football?"

She nodded as she looked at him shyly. His face lit up, "Alrigh', yeah. Of course, love." He walked closer to her as she brushed a piece of hair out of her face, 

"Well, I figure who better to learn soccer from than the professional who just scored." She teased and he stopped in front of her, holding up one finger, 

"FIRST LESSON. It's called football. NOT soccer."

She giggled as she held up three fingers, "Yes, sir."

Ben's eyes flashed as he bent down to whisper in her ear, "Save that for later." He pulled back to see her eyes wide with shock as he winked at her and kicked the ball out from underneath her boot. 

He considered himself to be a good boyfriend for only laughing a little bit when she stumbled and had to catch herself before falling into the grass.

She narrowed her eyes at him, "You prick."

"SECOND RULE. Never trust your opponent. Especially when they're as talented as I am." He called over his shoulder as he easily dribbled the ball down the pitch toward the goal as she gawked at him in disbelief. 

"HEY!" She yelled in indignation as she took off after him, cursing her clunky boots and shedding the scarf that kept blowing into her face. 

Ben laughed as he quickly kicked the ball into the net and turned to face her, cheering all the while as she ran straight into him. Her hair getting tangled and flying into Ben's face, her beanie having flown off in her mad dash to get him, as he made an "OOF" sound and stumbled back a few steps. 

"Not fair!" She wailed as she tried to get around Ben and get the ball out of the net as Ben chuckled and grabbed her hand, 

"All's fair in love and football, love." And spun her around so he could plant a loud kiss on her forehead as she yanked her arm away from him.

She scurried around him, grabbed the ball with her hands and, carrying it like a football player carrying a ball to the end zone, sprinted towards the goal on the other side of the field.

It took Ben's brain a good three seconds to comprehend what she had done and then for mock outrage to kick in as he heard her giggles getting quieter as she got farther away from him. 

His months of practice and training kicked in and he took off like a shot after her. 

She was so far ahead, and rather pleased with herself for what she had accomplished. She had tricked Ben, gotten a kiss and now she would score against him as well. 

That was when she realized Ben had been unusually quiet. 

She risked a glance behind her and saw all five feet ten inches of pure muscle. competitive, high on adrenaline, boyfriend coming straight at her like a freight train. 

If Ben hadn't been so focused on getting the ball from her he would have been on the ground, dying with laughter over how quickly her face dropped when she saw him closing in behind her. 

A quick calculation and she put on a burst of fresh speed to get to the goal before her boyfriend tackled her. The one other time he had tackled her was when they had been playing touch football with some of their friends one time and they both had gotten a bit too competitive. 

After having him apply ice pouches all over her body and give her full body massages (which always led to sex) for a full month, she had just now started to forgive him. She hated to see that streak ruined but, as Ben had just put it, all's fair in love and football. 

"You're mine." The growl that came from Ben's mouth had her stomach clenching in a delightful way and she finally understood the meaning of being scared and horny. 

She could hear his breath coming out in sharp pants as he put on a final burst of speed to clear the gap between them. She gripped the ball tighter and urged her boot clad feet to move even faster. 

The jangling of the metal bits got more frantic as she pushed her body even harder, gasping as she tried to fill her lungs with more air so she could get to the net before Ben could grab her. 

She felt the ghost of Ben's fingertips graze her sides as she launched herself into the net headfirst, deciding on a whim that getting the ball into the net was way more important than her physical well-being. 

Ben's eyes widened as he felt, rather than saw, her body move farther away from him as she launched herself, and the ball, into the net. Securing a goal for herself as Ben tried to stop before he landed on her. 

The ball made impact with her chest and her first thought was, sorry boobs, knowing that they would be sore tomorrow as she hit the ground, bits of grass flying up as she laid there. Catching her breath, she rolled over onto her back to gloat at Ben. 

Only to be greeted by Ben's massive form getting ready to land on her since he tried to stop too quickly, had tripped over his own feet and was trying to catch himself. 

She squeaked, rolling onto her side, rounding her body around the ball in her arms to try to protect herself and her prize. She squeezed her eyes shut, bracing herself for Ben's form to fall on top of her. 

When a couple seconds had passed and she hadn't been crushed by her boyfriend's muscles, she cracked one eye open carefully. 

Ben laughed as he saw her eye opening up, roving around, trying to figure out where he had gone. 

He shifted his hands so they would be further apart on either side of her body and lowered down into a push up to place a kiss on her cheek before pushing himself back up as she smiled and opened her eye wider. 

Ben had managed to catch himself before he squashed her by placing his hands on either side of her body, his own body hovering atop hers as she rolled onto her back, smiling, 

"That's a goal, I believe Mr. Jones." Ben couldn't help the smile that spread across his face whenever she called him by his "old" last name as he had begun to think of it. 

She smiled back and playfully wagged the ball in his face. He scoffed and hit the ball out of her hands as he pushed himself up to standing. 

"Hey! That's the game winning ball!" She protested as she scrambled up to grab it as Ben brushed his palms off on his shorts. As she bent down to pick it up, Ben took the opportunity to yell, "Nice ass" to which she promptly wiggled her butt at him as she performed an exaggerated bend and snap move. 

"You do realize that even though you were joking around, that was still incredibly sexy, right?" Ben asked as he moved to stand in front of her, tucking her hair behind her ear. She blushed and shuffled her feet back and forth, avoiding Ben's gaze as she became overwhelmed by his direct stare. 

Bending down, Ben met her gaze, "Hey, don't be embarrassed, it's a good thing. I meant every word." 

A small smile ghosted across her lips as she nodded and shuffled closer to him so she could wrap her arms around his waist. Ben smiled, "Thought that I was too sweaty to be this close to you?" 

"Shut up" came the muffled reply as she snuggled deeper into his arms as a particularly chilly breeze cut through their clothes. 

The crisp blue sky unfurled before them as the leaves rattled from the autumn wind dancing around them. Ben shivered as her eyes tracked the movement of the leaves as they rained down around them. Covering them in yellow and red confetti as the smell of dirt and decay filled their nostrils as they both took a deep breath in. 

"Hey"

Ben smiled, "Hello"

"Want to go home? You smell."

"Oh I smell huh? I think you smell worse than me at this point."

She reeled her head back in shock, "Me? That's only because you rubbed your boy stink on me!"

Ben's nose wrinkled, "Can you please never call it boy stink ever again? That's so distressing."

She sighed, "You have so many rules about what words I can and can't use it's really harshing my groove."

Ben chuckled, "I'm sorry my love. You're dating a picky man, what can I tell you? Words mean things."

"I know but first soccer and now boy stink, I mean, you've left me with nothing. I'm a shell of a woman." She sighed as she pretended to swoon into his arms.

Ben quickly caught her and pulled her closer to his frame, "You have to stop pretending to faint. I've already dropped you, like, three times in the past month alone."

"I know. And each time wounded me more."

"Love, I can't always catch you when you decide to fall-"

She gasped, "Each of those are trust falls and each one you miss my trust in you lessens-" Her sentence was cut off as Ben grasped her shoulders, his face the most serious it had ever looked;

"Please, never joke about that. I know you were just joking but even the thought of you not trusting me-I don't even want to think about it." She looked into his eyes and saw they were shining with tears. She cupped his face with both of her hands and nodded emphatically, "Of course sweetheart. I trust you with my life, Benjamin. You know that. And there's nothing you can do to break that trust."

Ben nodded and pulled her back into his arms for a hug. "Well, that's enough emotional shit for one day." he said brusquely, clearing his throat. She nodded as she tried to say something back but her voice was muffled by Ben's jersey. 

"What was that, love?"

She pulled her face away, "Can we go home? I can't feel my fingertips."

"If you bought gloves that ACTUALLY covered your whole hand this wouldn't be an issue!"

"And how many times do I need to remind you Benjamin that I have an aesthetic to keep up!"

Ben scoffed, "It'll be hard to keep up your aesthetic when you have no fingers left."

"And harder to give hand jobs"

"WHAT."

She blinked up at him innocently, "Nothing! Let's go home. I'll make you hot chocolate." She beamed at him and fluttered her eyelashes in what she hoped was a becoming manner. 

He narrowed his eyes at her suspiciously, "Alright. You've distracted me enough with the promise of hot chocolate. Let's go home."

She laughed and threaded her fingers through his, pulling him toward her car so they could go home together when Ben yelped pulling her to a stop, 

"Jesus, love! Your fingertips really are freezing!"

She rolled her eyes, "Did you think I was lying?"

"Well, you are prone to great exaggeration-"

"Fuck you and the hot chocolate I was going to make you then."

"Just kidding baby. I love you so much, have I told you how pretty you are?"

She laughed as she pressed her fingers onto Ben's cheeks as he hissed and screwed up his face, "You're lucky you're so cute."

"And I'm lucky you love me so much." He replied softly.

She gently kissed him and they found themselves back in the same position they had been in when the game had ended. Standing on an empty pitch, not even noticing they were alone. 

Because how could they be alone when they had the whole world right in front of them? 

[squirrel-moose-winchester]

Falling for the Holidays Ch. 28

Title: Falling for the Holidays Ch. 28

Pairing: Dean x Reader AU

Word Count: 1629

Series Summary: With October ending and the holidays underway, that only meant one thing for Dean Winchester. It meant returning to his childhood home and spending time with his family. It meant listening to his parents, especially his mom, ramble on and on about when he was going to find himself a nice girl, bring her home for the holidays, and then eventually get married and have children.  However, Dean wasn’t ready for that sort of commitment, so in order to get his family off his back, he comes up with an elaborate scheme! But like the saying goes, “sometimes lies become truths.”

Warnings: Smidge of angst (like it’s barely there), and Fluff!

A/N: Holy smokes, I am so sorry it’s taken me five-ever to get the new chapter out! Please forgive me and please enjoy the chapter!! Happy Reading!! xx

The next day, you slowly swam to consciousness as Dean’s scent swarmed around you. There was no hint of Clorox or rubbing alcohol, just Dean entirely. It provided a type of calmness and safety that you’d never felt before other than when around the green-eyed man. You reached over to his side, needy for some physical contact, but instead was greeted with cold empty sheets. Groaning, you lazily pushed yourself up into a seated position, bleary eyes scanning the room. Seconds later, with clear vision, you noticed that everything looked the same as always, nothing out of the ordinary.

Getting up from bed, you shuffled your way to the bathroom, locking the door behind you and emptying your bladder, then brushing your teeth, followed by twirling your hair into a sloppy bun atop your head, disregarding brushing your sleep-tangled locks. As you placed the hair tie in place, your eyes caught glimpse of the beige bandage on your forehead. At that moment, everything that happened came flooding back to the forefront of your mind.

It wasn’t a dream!

Overcome with panic, you rushed out of the bathroom and into the hallway, spinning on your heels as you took in your surrounding. Your eyes widened once you realized that you weren’t at the hospital. You were back at the Winchester home! Why? How? Dean?!

From where you stood in the hallway, just outside of Dean’s childhood bedroom, you could see the blinking red numbers of his old alarm clock. It was a little past noon and your sanity could barely keep up with what was going on. This was definitely not dream! If it were, you wouldn’t have the bandage on your head. Or maybe it was, and you got the injury while you fainted… or something?

Without a care of what you looked like, drowning in one of Dean’s flannel shirt and short sleeping shorts that hid beneath your top, you dashed down stairs, preparing to brace yourself for whatever you were going to be greeted with.

Reaching the bottom of the stairs, everything just kind of hit you all at once, as if your brain was finally able to function properly. The smell of cookies filled the house, the lights on the Christmas tree was on, but there was no one around except for one person sitting in John’s allocated armchair… but it wasn’t John. You knew who it was the instant you laid eyes on them. You could recognize the back of his head anywhere, and the shape of his broad shoulders. There was no doubt in your mind.

“Dean?”

Dean’s head turned slightly at the call of his name, a smile stretching across his cheeks. “Merry Christmas, Sweetheart.”

Tears filled your eyes and quickly cascaded down your cheeks. You didn’t know where everyone was, but that didn’t matter anymore. All that mattered was that Dean was here. He was home. He wasn’t in that hospital; he was here with you.

“Y-You’re here…” you muttered, hastily stopping right in front of him.

“Yeah,” he whispered, eyes following your movements. “The doctors said that I should stay at the hospital for another day, but said since it was Christmas, spending time with the family and my best girl would be a better environment for healing. I just gotta take it easy,” he smiled, “really easy,” he bit his bottom lip, eying you up and down, “so no sex for a while,” he grumbled with a pout, grabbing hold of your hand and tugging you a step closer, so that you were standing between his legs.

“I’m glad your feeling better,” you giggled, rolling your eyes at his joke. Leave it to him to make a sex joke during a serious moment.

Silence ensued and you allowed yourself to get lost in the feeling of being in the same room as him and not at the hospital. With an affectionate smile on your lips, you took the time to watch and observe him, making sure that this was all real. You reached out your hand, cupping his cheek as you used your thumb to brush over the stubble that had grown over the days. He was handsome. Always so handsome.

Dean leaned into your touch, relishing in the warmth your hand provided. He’d missed you. He wished he could hold you and love you properly, show you low much you mean to him. God, he was in love with you, and he couldn’t recall if it was a dream or not, but he could have sworn there was talk about marriage back at the hospital. He remembered someone saying that he needed to wake up if he wanted to marry you, and damn… not marrying you would be the biggest regret in his entire life. If waking up meant you’d spend the rest of your life with him, then he had no other choice… he had to wake up.

A smiled spread on your delicate features, admiration exuding in your expression for the man sitting in front of you. He was real. This was real. He was right there, nuzzling his scruffy face into your unscathed palm. Having Dean here with you, by you side, was the best Christmas gift you could have ever hoped for. He was the best gift in your entire life that you could have hoped for. You were convinced that God had made him for you and you for him. He brought the both of you through multiple trials of hell, only to prove that this thing between you and Dean was the real deal. He’s your soulmate.

“I love you,” you blurted, eyes still misty with adoration.

Dean’s green orbs locked with yours and he grinned. “I love you too.” He pulled at your hand again, pulling you even closer towards him, but you hastily and regretfully stopped, standing your ground as your shin hit the soft cushions of the armchair. “Baby…” he protested.

“The Doc said you had to take it easy.”

“Sitting on my lap isn’t going to kill me,” he dragged at your hand again.

“As much as I want to, I’m not taking that chance,” you jerked your hand away, “you’re still healing and I’m not looking to make things worse.”

“Please.” His voice was soft and his eyes even softer. “I just want to hold you. I need you in my arms. Please…”

How could you possibly resist him? There was no way you could say no, especially when he asked so tenderly. “Brat,” you hissed, the corner of your lips tipping upwards.

“You love me,” Dean cooed, happy to get his way.

Carefully, you sat on his lap, eyes scanning his every feature. His hair is mostly tamed, eyes greener than usual, nose a little red from the cold of winter, lips frosty pink, and the only freckles on his face that you can see are dusting across his cheeks and the bridge of his nose. The scruff clinging to his jaw only added to his handsomeness. If there was one word to describe the man that held your heart, it would be beautiful… inside and out.

“More than you can imagine,” you grinned, leaning in to press a gentle kiss on his lips.

Dean let out a content sigh, not realizing how much he needed that. His arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you closer and deepening the kiss. This was his heaven.

The sound of someone clearing their throat interrupted the moment, and you couldn’t help but giggle as you pulled away from a disappointed Dean. “I thought the Doctor said to take it easy?” Sam teased, arms crossed and leaning on the entry way of the kitchen and common room.

“Sammy, you always have the worst timing,” Dean groaned.

“Well, mom is getting antsy—”

“Liar,” Jess popped out of no where. “Don’t blame your mother,” she chides, lightly slapping Sam on his arm. “This guy is the one getting antsy. He wants to open presents,” she reveals as Sam’s face grew red.

Dean chuckled, shaking his head. “Some things never change, huh Sammy?”

“Shut up. You’re lucky your injured, otherwise I’d have to show you up and kick your ass,” Sam groused.

“Alright you two, stop your bickering,” Mary appeared, a large tray of cookies in her hands. Behind her, came John with a few glasses of milk in his hands, and much to your surprise, everyone else started filtering into the living room from behind him.

“Everyone is still here!” You chirped, excitedly and heart filled with fluttering warmth.

“Well, duh. It’s Christmas,” Jo beamed. “Besides, we’re already here. And… Aunt Mary’s cookies are too good to resist!”

“She’s not wrong!” Benny appeared, shoving a cookie into his already stuffed mouth.

A chorus of laughs filled the room before Mary instructed everyone to take a seat in the living room. As time went by, and presents were opened, you couldn’t help but feel thoroughly content. If someone were to ask you what Christmas joy sounded and looked like, it would be everything in this moment. The laughter, chattering, and all the bright smiles surrounding you.

“Did you like your gifts?” You twisted in your seat on the floor, between Dean’s legs.

“Yeah, but none of them compares to the one sitting in front of me,” he admits with a smirk.

You roll your eyes in response, giggling at his cheesiness. “Wow, you’re such a sap.”

“Only for you Sweetheart.” He winks.

Hopping onto your feet, you carefully resume your seat on Dean’s lap. “I love you,” you say, leaning in and giving him a quick peck.

“I love you.”

A chorus of protests and moaning and groaning interrupts the moment once again, but this time you and Dean can’t help but laugh.

--

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Say Something Nice Here!

[petersasteria]

You Again?! - H.O. // 4

Pairing: Haz x Reader

1,375 words

*This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events, locales, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.*

Tom and Harrison are waiting outside the university, leaning against Tom’s car. It’s finally results day and like tradition, Tom always shows up. Only this time, with Harrison.

Harrison has been doing alright these past few days, because he’s falling deeper in love with Y/N. He’s always happy and he’s always looking after himself to impress Y/N and he’s also making sure Y/N is alright. He treats her differently from all the other girls he’s dated. He normally just asks them straight up if they want to be his girlfriend, but with Y/N? He wants to do it the old fashioned way with all he courting and stuff. Tom mentioned before that Y/N finds it cute when a guy courts her first rather than straight up asking her if she wants to be their girlfriend.

“That’s why she’s never had a boyfriend before. Every time a guy asks her to be their girlfriend, she’d turn them down. She wants to be courted, because she figures it’s right to know the person who she’ll potentially be with before stepping into a relationship with them.” Tom says.

With this in mind, Harrison thinks it’s best to ask Tom for permission if he can court his best friend. After all, Y/N knows Tom for a long time and Harrison doesn’t know where Y/N’s family is.

“Hey Tom?” Harrison says. Tom looks at him but says nothing. “Is it alright if I court Y/N?” Harrison asks his best mate. Tom beams and says, “Yeah! I trust you, mate. I knew you’d like her!” Tom smirks as Harrison blushes.

A few minutes later, Y/N comes running out the building with a huge grin on her face. She looks around for a while and sees Tom and Harrison waiting. She runs to them and she immediately hugs Tom. Not being able to contain her emotions, she bursts into tears.

Thinking that she failed, Tom frowns, “It’s okay, Y/N. You’ll get it next time. I’m sure they’d give you a chance to take it again.” He rubs her back and hugs her tightly.

Harrison frowns, thinking that he failed as a study buddy. 

Y/N pulls away from Tom and wipes her tears, “Tom, I didn’t fail. I passed. I fucking passed! In fact, I got a perfect score!” 

Tom and Harrison look at her with wide eyes and they engulf her in a big group hug. The three of them cheered like there’s no tomorrow. They pull away and she looks at Harrison, “Thank you so much for helping me in studying. It means so much to me.”

Harrison smiles, “It’s honestly no problem. I’m so proud of you!” They smile at each other as Tom looks at them with a satisfied smile on his face.

-

A week later, it’s Y/N’s graduation. The only ones who attend are Harrison and Tom. Of course at this point, Harrison is still courting Y/N. He doesn’t give up, though. He doesn’t take ‘no’ for an answer when he likes someone. He knows that Y/N won’t give in for a while, but he thinks that she’ll be worth it.

Y/N graduates at the top of her class and the boys are extremely proud of her. Her family aren’t there to go to her graduation, because they basically disowned her when she said she wanted to be a lawyer. They wanted her to be an accountant like all of them, but Y/N marches to the beat of her own drum so, she followed what she wanted and vowed to herself that she’ll be a successful lawyer.

When she got kicked out, she told Tom and he let her stay with him until she got back on her feet. This is why Tom is always looking out for Y/N, because he’s the only one she has. Tom doesn’t mind, though. He treats her as his sister.

“I’m so proud of you!” Tom cries, hugging Y/N. She cries too and smiles as she thanks him. Harrison smiles and takes a candid picture of the joyful moment that’s happening before his eyes. 

Y/N pulls away and goes to hug Harrison. Of course, he gladly hugs back and tells her how proud he is. They pull away from each other and Y/N looks at them for a while.

“What’s the plan, Y/N?” Harrison asks, shrugging.

“I have to pass the board exam; that’s the next step, Haz.” Y/N says, determined to pass. She wants to prove her family that she can do it without them and she wants to prove herself that she can do anything she set her mind to.

“And I, we, believe that you will.” Harrison says, sweetly.

“Yes, because we’ll here every step of the way.” Tom nods. “Let’s celebrate!”

“Let’s take pictures before we go and celebrate, though. This would be fun to look back to!” Y/N giggles. They all take pictures together before celebrating.

-

Months later, It’s Y/N’s birthday and Tom is planning a small party at his place with his family and Harrison. Tom is so stressed with planning the whole thing, because he wants everything to be perfect. He knows that Y/N doesn’t like big celebrations, but she deserves a perfect one.

“Haz, text Y/N and tell her there’s an emergency.” Tom instructs.

“What if she asks what kind of emergency?” Harrison asks. Tom, due to all the stress, pinches the bridge of his nose and closes his eyes. He puts his free hand on his waist and calmly says, “Haz, you’re an actor too. Use your acting skills through texting.”

“What? Ho--”

“You obviously lie, Haz!” Tom shouts. “Seriously, are you okay?! Are you thinking?!”

Harrison puts his hands up in defense and texts Y/N about an ‘emergency’. Harrison isn’t mad at Tom; he understands his stress. ‘The planning and all his projects are getting to him’, Harrison thinks.

A few minutes later, Harrison announces, “Y/N says she’s almost here!”

Tom claps his hands, “Alright, everyone! It’s show time! Let’s hide!” Everyone goes to their hiding spot whilst Tom runs to hide near where the light switch is. He turns off all of the lights and waits for Y/N to arrive.

A second later, they hear keys jingling, signaling that Y/N is unlocking the door. Y/N enters the dark flat and as soon as she switches the lights on, everyone jumps out of their hiding spot to yell, “Surprise!”

Y/N jumps a bit and she smiles at the sight she’s seeing. “Aww, you guys! You didn’t have to!”

“It was Tom’s plan.” Harry says with a grin.

Y/N looks at Tom, who’s standing next to her. Tom just nods and leads her to the dining area. They all sing her a happy birthday as Sam lights the candle.

“Alright, Y/N. Make a wish.” Sam smiles. Y/N closes her eyes for a moment to make a wish before blowing the candle.

“Haz bought the cake.” Tom mentions as he hands out plates to everyone.

“Thanks, Haz.” Y/N smiles at him. Harrison smiles back and says, “No problem.”

“You better get used to it, though. I won’t be the one buying you cakes anymore.” Tom says sadly. 

“What? Why not?” Y/N frowns. “You always buy me cakes every year. It’s a tradition.”

“Traditions change.” Tom says, patting her back. “Besides, you’ve got a new cake provider.”

“Who?” Y/N asks.

“Me.” Harrison says nervously. “I’ll be buying you cakes for your birthday, for Christmas, for New Years, and basically for every holiday and celebration. Or even when you feel like eating cakes.”

Everyone is staring at them with a twinkle in their eyes. Harrison and Y/N clearly like each other by now and it’s making everyone in the room happy for them.

“You’ll do that for me?” Y/N asks softly.

“Yeah. Unless, you don’t want me to.” Harrison says, with a slight frown as the thought pops in his head.

“Of course, I want you to. It’ll be fun.” Y/N giggles lightly.

“Look, what I’m trying to say is--” Harrison stops himself as he looks at Tom for support. Tom nods his head and gives him a thumbs up.

“Is what?” Y/N asks.

“Will you be my g--”

“Yes.” Y/N answers immediately with a smile appearing on both hers and Harrison’s faces.

* * * *

-not proofread-

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[i-can-get-extra-with-my-ships]

A Slice Of My Love. Chapter 6. Wait, You Don't Think I'm Insane?

Sup children!! (No clementine my brother did not hack onto my Tumblr and write me a whole fucken chapter.) We be existing on the bean bag again. 

The farthest you will most likely see me venture is to my bed. Or a hotel. It depends how long this book goes for. I mean, we’re almost at 10 chapters. I said like 20-30 most likely. Holy shit. I’m almost ½ to ⅓ done with this book. Moving on before I go on more of a tangent than I already have!!

Pairings: Mentions of the glasses gays (it's toned down for this chapter and in chapter 7 it will be turned up to 11), Prinxiety but it’s best friend mode™ that has been preset to 11

Tw: Cursing, Fourth wall breaks (they be back, but not as bad this time), Virgil being insane, Virgil and Roman being both shippers and BFFs, the lack of sleep finally catching up to Virge, Vee thinking he has just proved a major point.

Virgil’s POV

----

Assuming that you’ve read this whole book, you already know that Pat has been overtaken by the powers of the boop™ and has gone upstairs with Logan. Logan never came back downstairs.

Roman was thinking about something. Well, I knew what that something was. You only have to be best friends with Princy for a year and a half to know what he wants to ask you.

“You wanna ask me about Alonso, don’t you?” Roman looked up at me. Then he went back to thinking.

“You know that as long as you don’t accuse me of being insane, you can ask me whatever the fuck you want.”

He looked at me again and then sat down at the table with a bowl of cereal. “Taking advantage of the fact that dad’s upstairs huh?”

The fuck? Dude, we’ve been best fucking friends for over a year now!! If you’re trying to ask me something just ask me!!

“No shit Sherlock.”

He gasped in fake surprise. “How DARE you!! I hate to inform you, but I am the prince, hence I am royalty. You do not speak to royalty in such a crude manner!!”

So the Roman stans are taking mild offense right now. I’m gonna tell you this once and once only. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN BEST FRIEND MODE™ HAS BEEN TURNED UP TO ITS PRESET NUMBER OF 11!!

Anyways, Roman stans aside, I laughed hysterically at Roman’s mocked offense. He does a really good impression of what I’d like to imagine offended Roman stans to sound like.

Ok, we’re gonna chuck the Roman stans out a window so I can actually move on from them. I decided that I was going to help Princey away from the conversation that He was trying to move away from. (I was really tempted to say spared.) The extra bitch hasn’t left yet, has it Em? (We are NOT doing this now.) Fine.

“Seeing as you’re trying to change the subject, Pat and Lo earlier.”

His face lit up at the mention of the glasses gays, as we’ve dubbed them.

“Looks like someone needs to get more sleep.” Ro did a crappy impersonation of Lo. I laughed some more.

“And don’t forget the boop™”

Roman started snickering “How did I forget the boop™? Uhh… Well, I only have 2 weaknesses: self-deprecation and affection.”

Roman was crappily imitating Pat now. I knew where Roman was going. I jumped up from my chair and ran over. Then I slowly walked by him and booped his nose.

Roman snickers turned into a bit of giggling, then he continued with our inside joke. “Never mind. I have 3 weaknesses: self-deprecation, affection and whatever Logan just did.”

I laughed even more at Roman’s shitty impression job. “Ok, you’re purposely sucking. I have accepted this challenge of sucking at doing impersonations for this joke.” I cleared my throat for the shittiest Logan Sanders impression in the history of the universe. I heard Roman mumble “Oh god” underneath his breath.

Good. You better be bracing yourself for this shitshow Princey.

“Patton, I believe that Roman and Virgil would call that a” I searched through imaginary vocab cards “boop™.”

We looked at each other and then laughed hysterically. I somehow ended up falling over in our laughter. We stopped for a moment and looked at each other again. Then laughed again, only harder this time.

Through my laughter, I managed “Stop laughing and help me you, stupid bitch!!”

He looked at me in disbelief. “You’re sitting there, on the floor, laughing, but I can’t laugh with you?” He lectured me while still giggling.

“I’m laughing at my own stupidity. Only I can laugh at myself.”

“Whatever. I thought I was supposed to be the dramatic one!”

The laughter had died down quite quickly after that. Roman helped me up off the floor. We walked to the couch and sat down.

Well… more he sat down, I lay down, and he was my footrest. It’s an us thing.

“Do you always have to put your feet on me, Virge?”

I scoffed and looked at him in disbelief. “Do I have anywhere else to put my feet? No. Do I want you to sit on my feet? No. Do I want to sit up? No. Do I want to move to the other couch? No. Are you my prisoner now? Yes.”

He laughed a little more. I could tell that he was thinking that I stole his job of being the dramatic one.

We sat there in comfortable silence. The only thing keeping it from being awkward was the light and playful atmosphere. I have no clue about you guys, but with a best friend that you’re almost always loud with, silence is just weird and awkward. (This is a thing with me and my best friend. Normally we just randomly quote Charlie the Unicorn at that point.) 

I decided that I needed to bring up the inevitable.

“You gonna ask me about Alonso any time today? I already told you. You can ask me. I trust you.”

He thought for a moment. “Umm…. Well…. What does he look like?”

I snickered a little bit. “Wow. You’re THAT scared that you’re going to offend me?”

He didn’t share my laughter.

“Oh, umm…. Kinda like Remy, but without the stupid sign that says sleep. But like Remy mixed with someone else. I can’t put my finger on who though.” Roman hummed in response. Then he got a mischievous grin on his face.

OH SHIT!! ROMAN DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE.

He dared though.

“So is he hot?”

I looked at him with my most serious “Bitch what the fuck?” face and asked him a simple question: “Roman, you’re my best friend and I love you (platonically), but why are you like this?”

He looked back at me with a “Bitch what the fuck?” face as well. “Because I’m the literal embodiment of Thomas’ romance. And as your best friend, I want you to find love.”

“That wasn’t cheesy at all Ramen.” I snickered a little bit at the Ramen part. Roman absolutely HATES the nickname Ramen. But he’s still Ramen.

“Don’t think Ramen’s going to get a reaction out of me. It’s not. I’m totally fine with that nickname now.”

My mind went to Someone Gets Hurt Reprise from Mean Girls as soon as Ro Ramen said fine. “REALLY FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE!! GO BE FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEN!!!”

Roman picked up on the reference and finished the song. “And I want my pink shirt.”

I joined him for the extra part that we add every time we sing/listen to that song.

“HE BROUGHT UP THE PINK SHIRT!! AND YOU KNOW THAT SHIT HAS HIT THE FAN ONCE YOU BRING UP THE PINK SHIRT!!!” We laughed hysterically once more.

Once our laughter had died down again, Roman got serious again. Ish.

“Are you gonna tell me if Alonso is cute or not?”

I couldn’t escape this conversation now. “I don’t know. I guess? You know that this isn’t really my department. It’s like 110% yours.”

He snickered a little bit. “So like, when did you notice him?”

I told him the story. “So Pat was lecturing me about how I should be sleeping and all that bs. I wasn’t really listening because of the hypocrite card. I was staring at the counter and he was just sort of chilling there. Existing.”

I looked at Ro to see his “Vee you’re insane” face but it never came, so I continued.

“Then after Pat went upstairs to get Logan. Alonso, at this point in time I didn’t know his name so I was just referring to him as ‘the counter guy’ in my head, started talking to me by quoting Heathers. I was quoting the scene that he started when Pat and Lo came downstairs. They told me that I was being crazy and that there was only a piece of bread. That’s why I thought that you’d think I’m crazy too.”

Roman looked at me. No discernible emotion could be seen on his face. It was kinda scary. He just told me “I don’t think you’re crazy.”

It took me a moment to comprehend that. “You don’t?”

“At least I think that.”

I didn’t fully think out what I was about to do before I did it. That’s very unusual for me. Might I remind you that I was running on two cups short of a full pot of coffee (Pat and Lo drank them) and like 2 hours of sleep?

I lept off the couch, grabbed Roman’s hand and dragged him up the stairs. Once I got to Pat’s room I kicked the door down. We were greeted with the sight of the glasses gays cuddling on Patton’s bed watching a movie.

After I kicked the door down they looked up at me in shock. Still cuddling though, so that’s a bonus.

Pat spoke first. “Virgil, please tell me why you just kicked down my door.”

I could hardly contain my excitement. I moved to the side a little bit and pulled Roman forward. “RoMaN sAyS i’M nOt CrAzY!!!”

Logan looked at Roman “Roman, please explain.”

Roman looked down at his feet. “Well, do I have a story for you guys.”

----

This chapter is the longest by far. The actual chapter part went over 3 pages. That’s a first.

Anywho. I really liked this chapter. It was quite fun to write. However, the next one will be even more fun to write. The glasses gays turned up to 11. God am I gonna have a ball with the next one.

Chapter 7 will most likely be next week. We’re going to Chicago and it’s a 3-hour drive there and back. I write on my laptop which will be left at home, and I don’t have a phone to write on soooo….. I get to listen to Heathers and Mean Girls mass amounts of times though.

                                            The existing internet writing human,

                                                              Em

----

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[cynicallystiles]

Beach Sunrises: Fallin’ All in You

Author: @cynicallystiles

Warning: Sooo this was supposed to be all fluff but I’m incapable of not including angst. Angst, FLUFF, fights, hurt feelings, slight smut but not really.

Pairing: Shawn Mendes x Reader

Summary: While on tour one day, Shawn sees a woman watching the sunrise by herself. Thinking that he’ll never see her again, he tries to forget as he goes on with the rest of his day. But, serendipity seems to have other ideas…

Notes: So, I’m real emotional as I type this right now because this is the final chapter for this series. I’ve spent my entire summer mainly working on this one and it’s very close to my heart. I deeply appreciate everyone who took the time to read and support this fic. All I can say is thank you, and I hope you enjoy the finale of Beach Sunrises.

P.S. There is definitely a parallel to the finale of Smallville. I’m actually crying, don’t @ me. I had to pay homage to my childhood otp.

PLEASE REBLOG OR COMMENT if you like it! I always welcome messages and asks about my work! Enjoy!

Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Part 11

Words: 10,425

3 Years Later

I finally turn the key with one hand while the other holds bags of groceries and my phone is pressed between my ear and my shoulder. My hand can't get a grip on the key because of the gloves I'm wearing, so I'd been struggling for a few minutes.

Obviously, I'm not used to having to wear a lot of cold weather gear, having spent most of my life on one warm coast or the other. The crazy part is that it's October and it's way colder than it got even in the winter down there. I guess that's what I get for moving way up north.

"What? Yeah, no. I heard you...I'm just currently trying to multitask," I explain while I nudge open the door to the condo as I listen to the person ramble frantically on the other end of the line. Sighing heavily, I kick the door closed and set the bags on the kitchen island. "You did what?"

I begin to put perishables away as they continue apologizing for the mistake they made with the footage I needed. This is my typical work phone call now. I try to take a few extra vacation days off the entire year and things fall apart without me. A few off for any holidays. Another for a birthday. And two days in October. The day of my birthday and the day after. Since both of them are important dates.

Pinching the bridge of my nose, I take the call to my office so I can look at plans while I instruct them on how to fix what they messed up. Five years ago, I never would have thought that I'd be the most sought after documentary film director for the stars. Not to mention editor as well. After the success of Hailee's documentary, the offers came pouring in. I got a personal request from Niall wanting to snag me next...and of course, I directed Shawn's next big tour...then it was 5 Seconds of Summer...and so on until now.

After about thirty minutes of me explaining the same simple fix over and over, I finally hang up the phone. I head down the hall to the bedroom and change into what I'm wearing for my date for my birthday. A content smile creeps onto my lips as I look around the vast room. Film posters and white Christmas lights litter the walls as well as a few bookshelves with books and great movies. In between, are carefully displayed guitars in stands or on wall mounts. I never would have thought that I'd be here right now.

You see, after my 23rd birthday where Shawn revealed to the entire world that he's in love with me and the next morning on the beach where I revealed the same to him...we agreed to give us a shot. It's been three years and Shawn has put out two more albums and done as many tours. I've been around the world several times over directing documentaries for bands and artists. It sounds extremely busy for both of us, right?

Neither of us thought it would be so hard. In fact, within the first year and a half, we were arguing so much about not having enough time for each other that I thought maybe it was too difficult. I thought maybe our careers would really be too much for both of us to handle. But, like always, Shawn surprised me with his solution.

~

"I'm just saying that it's not my fault that I can't be there to answer every single phone call, Shawn! I'm really busy all the time!" I yell as I storm out of his bedroom and toward the front door.

He sighs heavily, his feet padding the floor as he follows me. "And I'm just saying that it's not that hard to shoot a text when you get a free minute or let me know you made it to the next city safe, y/n," he says delicately. His calm tone just infuriates me more. He never raises his voice to the same level I get to.

"Ugh!" I half-groan, half-screech as I put on my coat aggressively. "I'm sorry that I'm forgetful! Okay?! But...Jesus, Shawn! The whole world doesn't revolve around you! SOME OF US HAVE ACTUAL JOBS!" I regret it as soon as it leaves my lips. His face looks like I've struck him as his mouth parts and his eyes widen. I wish I could take it back but I can't. And I can't apologize because I'm too stubborn and proud and my body is running on the adrenaline of being constantly badgered about texting him every goddamn minute.

He closes his mouth and places his hands on his hips as he looks down. The blood rushing in my ears finally slows down and the fire flooding my skin dissipates enough for me to see reason. I've always had a cruel knack for hitting someone where it hurts. And in the moment, when I'm angry...I don't hold back. Whether or not what I say is how I actually feel.

"I..." I try to find the words to make up for it. "Sorry...god," I sigh as I lean my back against the door and rest my head on it. I close my eyes and bite my lip and try to keep my tears of frustration in check.

He clears his throat and I tilt my head back to normal to look at him. "My career is just as real as yours is," he says in a serious tone.

"I know," I mumble as I look at the ground and toe the carpet. The look on his face says he's not done speaking so I let him continue instead of making it worse.

I hear him scoff and I venture a glance back up at him. His eyes stare at me intensely. "I work just as hard as you do. Just because I didn't go to college doesn't mean-"

"I know!" I interrupt him and move forward, grabbing his hands in mine. He looks down at me, puppy-dog pout on his lips. "I shouldn't have said it. I-I didn't even mean it, babe. I swear," I squeeze his hands.

"Then, why did you?" He asks, his hands letting go of mine to rub up and down my arms soothingly.

I shrug. "I just...this is hard, okay? It's harder than I thought it was going to be to do. We're both busier than ever and we're hardly ever in the same town...and when we are it's, like, one day together. I don't even get to wake up next to you and-" My rambling stops at the sound of his chuckling. I look up at him squinting. "Well if this is just a big joke to you..." I say as I turn toward the door.

"No! Honey, I'm sorry. It's just," he licks his lips trying to contain his amused grin. "If you're upset about us not spending enough time together then...why don't you move in with me?"

My eyebrows furrow momentarily. "What?"

"Move in with me, y/n. Here," he continues and my features soften.

My mouth parts and I don't know what to say. "Shawn...how is that supposed to fix anything?"

"It won't. Not completely," he admits with a shrug. "But, it's the first step in easing this distance between us. I know this is new to you...and it is to me to...but I love you and we both have to work every day to make it easier."

I nod slowly as I look at the ground and then back into his warm brown eyes. "I love you too, and you're right...I've just been expecting it to come easily and forgot that for us to work we both have to put in the effort. I'm sorry..."

"It's okay, baby," he mumbles as his lips press to my forehead. "But, if you move in...I promise it'll help. Living in the same space will give us more chances to see each other. Plus, it'll give us even more incentive to make time to come home..." he promises.

I bite my lip to hide my smile. "Home," I giggle slightly. "I like the sound of that..." I look up at him through my long eyelashes and his grin grows wider.

"Yeah?" He asks excitedly. I nod. "Yes! Oh my god, I love you so much," he gushes as he sweeps me up in his arms. I laugh giddily as he sets me back down. "One thing though...were you really gonna leave and walk around Toronto in your pajamas? It's two a.m.," he chuckles.

I roll my eyes as I softly slap his bicep. "Oh, fuck off," I say sarcastically as he brings his lips to mine triumphantly.

~

So, I moved in. And he was right. We see more of each other than we ever have and we're happy. When both of us get a break, we come home and we spend time together. Like I said before, we also make sure to take off days throughout the year for important dates. We're compromising where we can and it's working.

I move about the kitchen happily to put away the rest of the groceries and dance to the music I've put on. Anticipation flutters in my stomach because Shawn is supposed to be home any minute now. And then we're doing the same traditions for my 26th birthday that we've been doing since my 23rd.

But, I'm so lost in the music I've put on that I can't really hear much else. Of course, when Shawn's not home I blast his music. I was a fan first, after all. My shoulders roll and my body sways as I drag my socks across the floor like I'm an actual dancer. I get out the mugs and the bowl for popcorn and do a little twirl.

As I'm turning, I see a figure leaning against the doorframe. I jump in place and clutch my heart, only letting out a tiny yelp of surprise. As my heart begins to return to normal, he chuckles and sets his bags down. A beaming grin takes over my face as I don't hesitate to run and jump into his arms, wrapping my legs around his waist.

I pepper his face with kisses as his hands held me in place by my thighs. When I'm done with my barrage of affection I lean back and look deeply into his eyes. "You could've announced yourself, ya know," I scold him playfully.

"What fun would that be? I like when you dance like no one's watching," Shawn confesses lovingly. I shake my head with a reluctant smile and lean forward to capture his lips with mine. It's full of longing and all the weeks I've been waiting to touch him.

He carries me back to the bedroom effortlessly, neither of us caring about our previous plans. Because, in truth, this was the first step in our tradition for my birthday. I'd get home first, and go shopping. Then, he would get home and we'd make up for all the time we didn't have together wrapped up in the soft covers of our bed.

I hum as his soft lips make contact with the sensitive skin above my collarbone. "Mm...your perfume smells so good," he sighs as his mouth continues to leave marks.

"Thanks," I giggle at his goofiness because he says it every time. "It's yours actually." I bite my lip as he pops his head up to look at me astonished. "What?" I giggle more.

He shakes his head incredulously. "Have I mentioned I love you?" His eyes flick from my eyes to my lips repeatedly.

I shrug. "It sounds vaguely familiar..." I tease and we continue re-explore each other again.

Sometime later, I put my pajamas back on and head to the kitchen while he changes into his. Yes, our big birthday tradition is wearing pajamas and staying at home to watch as much Harry Potter as we can. So, I put the popcorn in the microwave and mosey into the living room while I wait.

I sit at the piano and let my fingers tap the keys. Shawn's kept his promise to teach me how to play and so I play the first thing I fully learned: the Harry Potter theme. I start out slowly and hesitant. He comes around the corner and stands behind me while resting his hands on my shoulders. I giggle as he tickles my neck and mess up a key, but I go faster nonetheless. By the end of it, it sounds like an upbeat song at a pub and I slam the final keys triumphantly as we fall into laughter.

The microwave beeps and we move to the kitchen to finish preparing snacks. I hand the popcorn bag to Shawn and he puts it in a bowl while I put in a different bag and hit the start button. While that pops, I get out the electric kettle and heat up the milk for the hot chocolate. It always tastes so much better when you use milk instead of water.

Soon, the popcorn and hot chocolate are done and we settle into the couch. My Newt Scamander mug sits on the coffee table in front of me as I take a few bites of my kettle corn. Shawn sits down with his arm gently around my shoulders and I lean into him as we start the movie. Since both of us have seen it a million times over, we mainly talk during the whole thing.

"Rent's due next week, by the way," he reminds me thoughtfully as he knows that I usually forget.

I take a sip of cocoa. "Yeah. I actually remembered this time," I chuckle. "Already transferred the money to the joint account...Our invitation finally came in."

"Yeah?" He asks as he eats a handful of some buttered popcorn from his bowl. I nod as we switch bowls to share the two different flavors. "So what date did they set?"

I squint one eye as I look at the ceiling. "March...sixteenth...I think? Next year? Don't quote me on that," I giggle as I crunch the savory snack. "It's on the fridge, you can look before bed."

He nods and I can feel his eyes linger on me as mine go back to the screen. After a few minutes of feeling his stare, I pause the movie and then turn to him. I raise my eyebrows to ask him what's on his mind.

He blushes and looks away briefly before swallowing. "So...I was thinking..." he begins nervously.

"Oh, no. That's never good," I tease and he cracks a smile before playfully shoving my shoulder. I laugh and grab another handful of popcorn.

He swallows again, and my smile fades a little bit as I see how nervous he is. "Anyway...we've been living together for, like a year and a half, and we share the rent and all that. We've been dating for longer..."

"Shawn, spit it out," I say as anxiety rises in my chest.

Taking a deep breath he finally says it. "I was wondering if you wanted to share a phone plan...ya know it'd be cheaper and what not."

"That's what you wanted to ask?" I question incredulously. The way he was acting made me think he was gonna propose or something. He nods. "That's sweet, but I'm fine with the one I have."

I try to turn the movie back on but he stops me. "You're fine with yours? That's it?"

I sigh as I look him intently in the eyes. "Yes."

"I don't believe you," he states.

Rolling my eyes, I reply with a scoff, slightly mimicking his voice, "I don't care." He bites the inside of his cheek as he tries to fight off his amusement.

"Are you ever gonna stop quoting what I say in interviews?" I shake my head with a wry smile. "Fine. But, I know there's more to it than that. It took literal months to convince you to get a joint account for the bills instead of you just writing me a check every month. I felt like your landlord or something..."

I try to hold in a snort but fail a little bit. "I mean..." I begin to tease before I see the look of exasperation on his face. I take a breath to compose myself. "Sorry. Um...why is this phone plan so important to you?"

"I dunno," he shrugs. "I guess I'm just trying to build a connected life with you."

"Through...joint bank accounts...and...phone plans..." I double-check.

He sighs. "I know it sounds stupid, but I feel like you want to have all your things separate to make it easier for you to leave..."

"Not easier for me to leave," I mumble. "Just a cleaner break when you decide you don't want this." My lips purse as I stare at my lap.

He groans from beside me. "Why in the hell would I ever do that? How many times do I have to convince you that I'm not going anywhere??"

"Because eventually you're gonna get tired of all my stupid and irrational behavior..." I sigh. "I'm selfish and jealous and needy and very impulsive and bipolar...and a whole lot of other things that just add stress. Your forever person is gonna be someone who lifts the weight off of your shoulders. Not adds to it."

I pick at my fingernails as I stare absentmindedly at the wall. "You're not selfish," he says after a beat. I look up at him bewilderedly.

"How is that?"

"You just told me, y/n. You kept yourself closed off from me because you wanted to protect me. How is that selfish? You say that you're needy and impulsive...but isn't everyone to a certain degree? I know I fucking am. You've already lost it several times because I text you every spare second I have on tour. You have a million voicemails on your phone because I wanted to hear your voice despite the time differences. Everyone wants to know that the person they love most loves them just as much," he rambles and I crack a small smile.

He continues on, "I know about impulsive too. This fucking eight on my finger is proof that I have zero impulse control. Everyone has highs and lows, y/n. Maybe not to the degree that you do, but that's not your fault. Since day one, you have been making decisions about us based on what you think is best for my career and my heart. That is so beyond selfless, I can't even explain it in words."

"I just don't want you to have to worry about taking care of me on top of everything else," I bite the inside of my lip.

"I'm not worried about that, honey," he promises as his hand reaches out to caress my cheek. "Because we take care of each other. That's how it's always been. And I promise you, it's how it's always gonna be."

I lean forward and kiss him deeply, slightly tipping over both of our bowls. A few kernels fall out and I giggle as I retract from him. "We can go look at plans tomorrow after the beach. Okay?" He agrees, and we fall back into our comforting tradition.

Early the next morning, I feel the bed dip as Shawn gets up to prepare for our day together. It’s always like this. He gets up earlier than me and gets things ready so I can have an extra hour of sleep. Mainly because I’m up later than him making sure that everything is cleaned up before bed. We share the chores and responsibilities and it makes me happy that we’re doing good together.

Eventually, he wakes me and I get ready. As soon as I’m dressed and ready to go, we head down to his Jeep. Shawn carries the picnic basket and I carry the blankets. It’s still a little dark out, so it’s pretty chilly. But, we’ll make it to the beach just in time to watch the sunrise.

We arrive and I lay out a few blankets, saving the others to wrap around us in case it gets too cold. It was always warm when we celebrated our anniversary at the other beaches. But here in Toronto, it gets cold in October so we weren’t sure if we’d stay as long as we usually do.

Shawn sits down and holds his hand out to help me sit with him. I tuck my legs underneath myself and watch as the light begins to grow and he unpacks our picnic. I pull out the thermos and pour some hot chocolate to warm the tip of my nose. We sit like that for a few hours while the beach is empty and the sun fully rises.

These are the simple moments that I make sure to burn into my memory for when we both go back to our careers. I think about how much I’ve already accomplished since I graduated, and then realize that Shawn has been in his dream job since the age of 14. The only way I can ever look at him is in awe because he’s truly astonishing.

After that, we came home for holidays and special events like the Grammys or the Oscars. Then in March, we had a whole week off for the both of us while we attended our friends’ wedding. A year or so after Shawn and I got back together, Niall and Hailee got together. He just proposed in March of this year and they apparently didn’t want to have a long engagement.

So, Hailee asked me to be her Maid of Honor. Which I almost cried because of. It meant the world to me that she loves our friendship as much as I do. Of course, Shawn is Niall’s Best Man. The week was spent helping them prepare for the wedding and making sure everything would go smoothly. Because of this, Shawn and I didn’t really see each other much. Which was alright because this week wasn’t about us.

Both of them insisted that they didn’t want a bachelor or bachelorette party. Honestly, I was relieved because I suck at planning parties. And maybe I was a tiny bit relieved because that meant Shawn wouldn’t be out drunk somewhere having a stripper giving him a lap dance or something. They say before the wedding came quickly and we were getting ready for the rehearsal dinner in our hotel room.

I stand facing the mirror trying to get my bracelet to clasp with no luck. I hear Shawn enter from the bathroom, shoes already on because they’re tapping on the floor. “Need help, baby?” He asks sweetly.

“Yes, please,” I giggle as I turn around and hand him the bracelet while holding out my wrist. He easily clips it and I do a test shake to make sure it stays. When I finally look at him, my heart flutters. “Wow,” I breathe out, taking in his handsome figure.

He chuckles and pulls me to him by my hips. “Wow yourself, honey,” he mumbles as his soft lips sink into my cheek. I hum in content and slip my heels on before taking his hand in mine.

The entire rehearsal I could feel his gaze on me. Every time I glanced at him, he was already looking. Heat crawled up my neck every time because the look in his eyes was anything but innocent. As I sat next to Hailee I found myself crossing and uncrossing my legs, unable to get comfortable with the warmth growing there.

Watching him lick his lips as if he didn’t know what watching that mouth does to me, sent shivers down my spine. Then he would smirk as he noticed me shift and I knew that he was playing a game. Well, I could do the same. I flipped my hair over one shoulder and delicately ran my index finger along my collarbone as if it were a mindless action. I gently pulled my bottom lip between my teeth as I listened to the conversation around me.

Stealing a seductive glance at him, I see that he’s biting the inside of his cheek to prevent his smile while shaking his head incredulously. The sight brings a silent giggle to my lips as I wink at him. He breathes a huff of air out and rests his chin in his hand forlornly. The night wears on and I walk in front of him to unlock the door to our room, my hips swaying just a tad extra.

As soon as we’re inside, he grips my hips and spins me around. I giggle as my lips immediately go to his neck, sucking the sensitive skin there while his hands find the zipper of my dress. Soon, we’re both without clothes we love each other fervently into the night.

We woke early the next morning and kissed each other goodbye as we separated to help Hailee and Niall prepare for their big day. What surprised me most as we were getting her ready was how calm she seemed. There was no sign of pre-wedding jitters that most brides seemed to have. I sit to the side of her while her hair is being curled.

“Can I ask you something?”

She looks at me in the mirror. “Of course, y/n.”

“How are you so...sure? Like, you haven’t been together that long really...” I ask, not knowing if she understood what I was trying to say.

Her expression softens, she holds her hand up to stop the hair stylist and turns to me. “Are you asking how I know I'm sure that I love Niall enough to marry him...or are you asking how to know if you’re sure that you want to marry Shawn?”

“It just seems so...permanent and official. Won’t it be hard with your careers?” I question as I pick at my fingernails.

She takes my nervous hands in hers. “Life isn’t without hardships. But, I’m not doing it all alone, y/n. Niall and I are a team of two against the world...and so are you and Shawn.” She smiles at me and it eases the tension in my stomach. My lip curls upward and I pull her into a hug, careful not to mess up her makeup or hair.

In an hour or so after she’s ready, we all line up and get ready to walk. Shawn and I are assigned to each other since we’ll be walking out last before the flower girl and ring bearer and then Hailee. I stand on Shawn’s left, my burgundy dress just barely grazing the ground because of my heels. He holds out his arm to me with the sweetest smile and I take it while my left hand holds the small bouquet of white calla lilies.

I take deep breaths and I guess Shawn must’ve noticed. “Everything okay?” He whispers and I pull on a smile as I look at him and nod. Before he can reply, the doors open and we begin to walk slowly. We reach the front and stand on our respective sides.

Soon, Hailee has reaches the front and everyone in the room is smiling. We can all see how perfect they are for each other. She turns around and hands me her bouquet before the vows start. My heart is beating with excitement for her and my eyes water while I listen to their heartfelt promises.

I blink rapidly as not to ruin my makeup and I look at Shawn. For once, he’s not looking at me first. I can see the glisten in his eyes as Niall’s promises to Hailee touch him deeply. Then, he looks to me. Sentimental smiles spread across our lips and he mouths ‘I love you’. I mouth it back to him.

The reception is just as sweet and everyone’s toast is so special to the occasion. Pretty soon, the first dance starts and Shawn sits beside me as we watch them sway out on the floor. His arm drapes around me, fingers tracing patterns on my shoulder.

“So...” he begins cautiously. “Was there a reason you looked so nervous before the wedding or...”

I clear my throat and tear my eyes away from Niall and Hailee to look at him. My mouth softens into a happy smile and I lean forward and press my lips to the corner of his lips. “Not really. This wedding just has me thinking about a lot of things,” I admit casually.

“Oh...uh...” he begins nervously as a tiny look of fear passes over his eyes.

I chuckle. “Relax, I had just been asking Hailee how she was so sure that Niall was ‘the one’,” I say as my fingers make quotation marks.

“Y/n, I-“

“Honestly, everything is good. We’re good,” I assure him.

He sighs frustratedly. “I’m not good, y/n,” he says seriously.

“What? Why?” It’s my turn for fear and panic to run through me.

He looks deeply into my eyes, searching for something. “Because we’ve been together for three and a half years pretty much,” he starts.

“Gee. Sorry, you got such a lengthy prison sentence with me,” I tease with an incredulous grin because I don’t know where this is going.

He takes a deep breath, trying to remain on track. “Would you let me say what I’m trying to say?” I nod, shifting so I can see more of him. “I know that we’ve been together longer than they have and that’s probably making you wonder why I haven’t asked you yet...”

“I guess...” I answer

He nods, accepting my reply and continuing. “The truth is...I’ve been scared that proposing would make you run away. If you haven’t noticed, you used to be a huge flight risk...”

“Ah, but that was before you tied me down with a joint bank account and a shared phone plan,” I joke. He glares at me, wanting to laugh.

“Can you be serious for two seconds?” I shrug. He groans. “Y/n, I want to marry you. But, I don’t want you to feel trapped or whatever with me-“

I raise my hand. “Can I say something?” He looks at my hand and cracks a smile before nodding. I lower it and continue. “Shawn,” I sigh, “honestly, I’m not concerned about you proposing.” His face falls. “I mean, you kind of already did on my birthday...”

“No, I didn’t,” he shakes his head and knits his eyebrows together in confusion.

I laugh. “It wasn’t a proposal proposal. But you promised that we’d take care of each other forever,” I remind him. “So...I’ve kinda been walking around with the notion in my head that eventually we’d just get married,” I say truthfully.

He looks at me bewilderedly. “Are you serious?”

“I mean...yeah?” I shrug. “We share a phone plan now. We’re committed for life,” I say seriously before cracking a tiny grin.

He playfully shakes me by the shoulders. “You are impossible! Ya know that?” He chuckles. I giggle in return.

“So...is this solved now? We’re engaged and we’ll just pick a date to go make it official?” I question innocently.

“What? No! Y/n, I haven’t proposed...you don’t even have a ring,” he says in his concerned tone.

I place my hand on his thigh gently as I lean forward. “Baby, I don’t need a ring. And I don’t need some big proposal. I just need you and me. So, I’m set already,” I assure him. He tries to argue but I just shut him up with my lips. I hear Hailee on the microphone asking me to come do a friends dance with her so I pull away slowly.

The rest of the night was wonderful, and Shawn seemed to have relaxed after our conversation. We both left our blissful vacation and went back to being far too busy to see each other longer than a couple of days. Even for his birthday, we only had one night because it was in the middle of another tour for the both of us.

Shawn called me late one night, early for him, saying that James had called him asking if we could do a segment together. I, of course, agreed. Only to have Shawn admit to me a few weeks later that it would be on our anniversary. Despite my disappointment in breaking our tradition, I traveled to LA on my 27th birthday and showed up the next morning to film the segment.

I arrived and things were a little different than the last time I had been here. But, then again, so was I. I went through hair and makeup, this time they even gave me a manicure with French tips on my natural nails. Then, I was ushered to wardrobe. I was surprised because I was content with what I had on. But, they insisted on putting me in an ivory sleeveless lace dress that went to my knees. They also put me in wedges of the same color.

I was beginning to grow suspicious because even though this wasn’t what I had planned to wear, I knew it to be from my closet. The shoes as well. It was the outfit I had put in the back of the closet for whenever Shawn and I made time to go to the courthouse and get married.

Shawn and I got to be in the same dressing room, so we ate the snacks and made ourselves comfortable while we waited. He looked angelic as always in the black slacks and matching ivory dress shirt he had on. A slight tint of pink covered his cheeks and I noticed how he kept shaking his leg repeatedly.

“What are you up to, Mendes?” I question while squinting my eyes at him suspiciously.

His eyes widen. “What? Me? I’m not doing anything,” he rushes out. I open my mouth to answer but we hear the knock on the door signaling our introduction. Shawn hops up quickly to get it and begins talking as I slowly make my way over.

I duck under the arm that holds open the door and smile at the camera. “Hey, James! So nice of you to allow Shawn and I the same dressing room!”

“Well, of course! Although, I’m afraid if we hadn’t you’d have been in there anyway. Amiright?” He jokes from his place onstage.

I shrug playfully and the crowd laughs. We both wave as he moves on from us. About 10 minutes later, we’re brought out to an empty stage for the game part of the show. The cameras roll and James begins his spiel.

“Alright, ladies and gents! We have a special treat for you today as Shawn has been able to convince y/n to overcome her fears in a game of...NUZZLE WHAAA?” The crowd roars and s grip Shawn’s hand.

I laugh nervously. “I was assured that I would not be sticking my face into anything that I’m scared of! You’ll both be in huge trouble if I do!”

They laugh along and Shawn lets go to face me. “Wait...you’re supposed to be on my team to protect me!”

“Honey, you’ll be fine,” he assures me confidently.

I breathe shakily as Hailee comes up behind me and Niall behind Shawn. “Well, at least I know Hailee won’t let me die,” I joke before putting on the blindfold. As soon as it’s over my eyes, I hear the crowd laugh and James must be waving his hand in front of my face as a test.

Reaching my hand out, Hailee grasps it and my elbow to give me balance. “Alright and...BEGIN!” James announces. I slowly inch forward, trying to feel anything with my face but I can’t seem to find anything.

“Is there anything even there??” I laugh after a minute. This feels so ridiculous. My balance is horrible without my eyes. Plus, I’m in heels. The crowd laughs with me.

James speaks again. “Why don’t you try nuzzling a little lower, y/n. It’s a little bit shorter than you right now,” he offers.

I crouch down lower, trying to nuzzle my face into whatever is there. Honestly, they’ve probably got a bowl full of crickets out for me. Suddenly, the crowd begins screaming excitedly and cheering and I don’t know what’s happening. “What was that? What happened?”

“Just keep going, y/n,” Hailee giggles. I roll my eyes even though no one can see. The crowd remains loud and it’s concerning me.

Finally, my face bumps into the edge something. I nuzzle my face forward in tiny motions, not wanting to scare it if it’s a snake. It feels like a soft material, but it’s definitely hard. The edges are confusing me, this is harder than it looks.

“Ugh! I have no idea what this is!” I complain.

James giggles. “Hailee, help her sit on her knees and use her hands.”

“Why isn’t Shawn saying anything?” I gasp. “You better be sticking your face in whatever this is too, Mendes!”

I hear him chuckle in front of me as my knees feel the ground. Hailee carefully places my hands in front of my face and I wave them around until I find the object. It’s small. So small that someone has to hold it in their hand.

My fingers traces along the smooth material of what feels like a rounded box. “Okay! Is it a box?” The cheers that had died down suddenly shot up again to an impossible level of loud. I couldn’t even hear my own thoughts.

Suddenly it moves and I yelp in surprise. “IT’S NOT A BOX!!! IT MOVED!!” I cry.

“It is a box...just keep guessing y/n,” James urges.

When I put my hands out again it feels different. Like a hard mouth, with something sticking up out of the middle. The top of it has ridges and the sides that disappear into something feel cold and smooth. Deciding I can’t tell what it is, I move my hands back to the box and the hand holding it.

I slide my hand over their fingers, taking note of what feels like a ring on their pinky. “Who is this?” The crowd chuckles and cheers. My hand follows the connection of the fingers to the hand and then to the wrist where I can feel a cold band hanging around it.

“Oh, my god...” I suddenly can’t breathe. My mouth parts and the beating of my heart is so hard that the mics are sure to pick it up. I carefully trace my hand back over the object, trying to confirm what I suspect. With shaking fingers, I reach up and slowly take off the mask.

Shawn comes into view on his knee in front of me. In his hand is an open velvet box that holds a ring. His adorable face shows me a loving and hopeful look, with just a hint of cheekiness because he actually surprised me.

Immediately I feel tears pool in my eyes, so I bury my face in my hands as I sit fully back on my knees. I hear the crowd simultaneously ‘aww’ at the gesture. Emotion overcomes me and I don’t want to look up for fear that it might disappear.

“Y/n y/l/n,” he begins ceremoniously. Slowly, I lower my hands and look between the ring and him.

I swallow the thick feeling in my throat and sniffle. “Shawn Mendes, I said I didn’t need a big proposal or a ring,” I scold him and my laugh is watery. He grins, and it reaches his eyes causing my heart to palpitate.

“But you secretly wanted one, didn’t you?” He whispers conspiratorially. I nod the tiniest bit and he licks his lips. “Good. I’ll save the big long speech for the vows, so...will you marry me?”

I press my interlocked hands to my nose as I breathe deeply. My head begins to nod up and down and the brightest grin splits my lips. “Yes. Yes! Oh my god, yes!” I squeal in excitement.

His face scrunches up in pure happiness when he smiles and my body is just rushing with everything that feels amazing. He takes the ring out and carefully places it on my ring finger. Before he even finishes, I throw my arms around his neck to kiss him passionately.  My newly ringed hand tangles in his curls while my other keeps a firm hold on his cheek.

The crowd whistles and cheers as his fingers dig into my back. I’m assuming the show went on commercial because everyone starts bustling about moving decorations and an archway out onto the stage. I break away from Shawn momentarily.

“What’s everybody doing?” I ask quizzically. The smirk returns to his face and then I know. “We are not seriously getting married right here, right now!” I say incredulously.

He nods. “What better day than our anniversary?” He asks rhetorically. Before I can respond, Hailee drags me back to makeup to have my mascara and lipstick fixed.

“I can’t do this right now!” I exclaim in panic. “I don’t have Xander, or Benny, or even Anna!” I begin to spiral with how fast everything is happening.

Hailee chuckles. “We got it, y/n.”

I begin to ask what she means when Xander, Benny, and Anna walk through the door. “Oh my god!” I scream as I run over to them and sweep them up on a hug. I know what you’re thinking. What is Anna doing here? Well, I had to give her a second chance after I learned that she played a part in helping Shawn win me back.

“Commercial’s almost over,” Hailee warns. “You ready?” I look at her with wide eyes before I smile. I nod and I take my spot offstage as I wait for my cue.

On my side, stands Xander as my Man Of Honor, then Hailee and Anna and I see that Aaliyah has been flown in. It’s odd but those are my people. On Shawn’s side are Niall as his Best Man, then Taylor and a couple of his childhood friends. My smile falters as I realize that I don’t see Shawn.

Anxiety builds in my chest as the music starts and I’m about to walk out there by myself. One hand falls from the bouquet of my favorite flowers to my side as everyone looks at me expectantly. I freeze. My lungs inhale air shakily as I don’t know what to do. And then a warm and gentle hand slides into mine.

Looking down, I follow the hand up the arm and up to the man that owns it. I grin adoringly as I see Shawn standing there. He smiles softly at me before wrapping my hand in the crook of his elbow. My heart is beating giddily and I feel the warmth spread along my cheekbones as he begins to walk me down the aisle. He’s confident and poised and I’m not even looking ahead of me. I’m looking at him. I’ve never stopped admiring how gorgeous he is when he’s happy.

It’s weird having people cheer at my wedding and it’s only now occurring to me that several hundred strangers are watching us. And tonight, several million will be. We far each other and I give my bouquet to Xander to hold Shawn’s hands. James helps us proceed through vows easily, both of us crying much more than we intended to. Then, he pronounces us married and Shawn kisses me. The kiss was extremely delicate and I could tell that this was the single most scary but amazing moment of his life. I’m sure my lips conveyed that I felt the same way.

A Year and a Half Later

I sit alone in the early hours of the morning out on the porch swing facing the beach with a thick blanket wrapped around me. Cold wind nips at my exposed skin and I don’t know how long I’ve been sitting here like this. All I know is that I can’t set foot in that house again.

At least not until I’m feeling less confined. Less hostile toward him. Things were going fine...until they weren’t. And I can’t put all the blame on Shawn because I guess it should’ve come up before now. We should’ve talked about how the both of us felt and where we wanted this to go.

But, we didn’t.

So, here we are in the most beautiful house on the edge of a beach. We both agreed that the condo was getting cramped for all of our things. All of his music memorabilia kept spilling into my workspace and getting in my way. The man has more jeans than he ever wears and probably even more guitars than he plays. Our solution was to find a bigger place.

I would’ve been content with just an apartment with more rooms. But, Shawn was insistent that if we were going to move that it should be into a real house. We’re adults and he wanted to start living like one was the excuse he gave me. We’ve been living here for six months and he finally told me the real reason last night.

We had a huge argument and that led him to slam the door to our room and me to storm out onto the porch in my pajamas. I shake my head, remembering how quickly it became a screaming match. The first time he had ever risen his voice to my level, even louder than. He had no reason to be that upset. After all, what he was expecting of me was ridiculous.

I made up my mind long ago about it and it wasn’t going to change just because he said pretty please. It shocked me at how strongly he felt about it. So, strongly he said something even more hurtful to me than I have ever said to him.

~

Music blasts throughout the house as I finally, finish unpacking the last of our boxes into the fifth room. Shawn will be home later tonight, but I wanted everything to finally be unpacked before he gets here. The first room was our bedroom, the second and third for our separate workspaces and the fourth was the guest bedroom for when his family wants to visit.

That just left the fifth extra room to put all of our oddball stuff, I guess. I stand up and look around the room triumphantly. Just as I begin breaking down the boxes to throw them away, I see lights flash through the window. Shawn is finally home. The reason I wanted everything done before he got here is that he said he had important and life-changing news. He’s always so dramatic.

He opens the front door and I’m right there to leap into his arms, causing him to drop his suitcases. He chuckles and buried his nose in my neck. “I missed you so much,” he mumbles.

“I missed you more,” I promise as I pull back and peck him on the lips. He gives me another kiss as he sets me down. “So, what’s this big news?” I ask curiously.

He holds up a finger and looks around his feet for a small gift bag. After retrieving it, he takes me by the hand and leads me to the fifth room. “Okay, so I’ve been thinking a lot since our wedd-“ he stops as he looks around the room.

“Tada!” I exclaim as I spread my arms out in the middle of the room. “I unpacked the last of the boxes!”

He tries to hide the slight downturn of his lips. “I thought we said these boxes were going on the shed,” he reminds me.

I sigh. “Yeah, we did,” I agree. “But I just figured...why leave them out there to get dusty and covered in bugs when they could be in here!”

“Because I had a surprise planned for this room,” he admits.

I chuckle slightly sarcastically. “What? Gonna turn it into a room for all your music awards?” I tease. When he doesn’t answer me, I keep going. “Put a special plaque on the outside and have a velvet rope so no one who visits can enter?” I giggle.

“Y/n, I’m serious. It would’ve made sense after my news,” he sighs and sinks into a comfy chair I bought for the room.

I cross my arms and look down at him. “Okay, well what’s your news?”

He silently holds up the gift bag and I cautiously take it from him. I pull out the gift paper and pull out a tiny onesie that says “Music is in my DNA” and there’s a fingerprint made out of musical notes.

I gasp dramatically, “Shawn...are you pregnant?” Giggles fall from my lips until they’re silenced when I see that he’s unamused.

“Jesus, y/n,” he rolls his eyes and stands up, taking the onesie and putting it back in the bag. “That was my unsubtle way of saying that I want to have a baby with you.”

My smile fully vanished and my blood runs cold. “You what?”

“C’mon, honey. We have the perfect house, with enough room to spare...or we will when we move all this stuff into the shed...” he begins rambling. “Let’s have a baby.” In his eyes, there’s a kind of delicate dream that crushing would devastate him.

But, I don’t share that dream. “Shawn...I-“ I scoff, almost disbelieving that this came out of nowhere. “I don’t want to a baby right now...”

“Why not?” He questions.

I lift my shoulders and let them fall helplessly. “Neither of us are in a position to raise a child, babe. You will never be home. What, are you expecting me to stay home and raise it by myself?” I answer, my voice rising just a bit.

“No!” He replies just as heatedly. “That’s why I just told Andrew today that I’m slowing down with all the tours and stuff. No more back to back traveling around the world,” he explains.

I stare at him intensely. “Okay, but you’ve always said that when your music slows down you’d pick up acting. Has that changed? Because you going off to do movies or whatever is still being gone.” I know that my tone is becoming more and more hostile but I don’t like where this is going.

“I don’t know. But I’ll be here a majority of the time, y/n,” his stern voice his telling me that this subject won’t be easily laid to rest.

“What if we’re both booked at the same time? I just started my career, Shawn! I’m not giving it up so you can have a kid!” At this point, I’m slightly yelling and I leave the room because it’s suffocating me.

I hear his footsteps close behind me. “Are you serious? WE! So, WE can have a kid. I don’t understand why you’re being like this!” He yells right back.

“Because maybe you’ve been going strong for thirteen years and you want a ‘break’ to have a kid, but I’ve barely been in my career for six. And I love it! I get that you’ve already lived the most exciting parts of your life, but I’m just getting started! How can you ask me to give up my career for this??”

He groans in frustration. “I’m not asking you to! You can still do your job without traveling the world constantly!”

My fingers grip the roots of my hair and I want to pull all the strands out. “OH! So you expect me to not only give up my body to another living thing for ten months, you ALSO expect me to be the one juggling working from home and being a stay-at-home mom?!”

“I WILL BE HERE WITH YOU!!” He yells back at me.

I inhale deeply. “YOU DON’T GET IT, SHAWN! I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE A KID EVER!!!”

“You...” he stutters. “You don’t want kids?” His voice sounds broken, and the dream is crushed. But, there’s no going back.

I clear my throat which is hoarse from screaming. “No,” I whisper. “I never have. I guess we should’ve talked about kids sooner.”

“Yeah,” he scoffs. “Would’ve saved us a lot of time and trouble, huh?” He places his hands on his hips as he looks down.

The words pierce my heart like sharp jabs from a needle. “What’s that supposed to mean?” My voice almost cracks because I suddenly realize that this is the dealbreaker for him. Out of all the rest of our problems and my insecurities, this is what he won’t compromise on.

“It means...” he sighs aggressively as he looks at me with cold eyes. “I never would’ve married you.” With that, he storms back to our room and slams the door.

I choke on my breath and it feels as though a fist is twisting my insides. Grabbing the nearest blanket, I run out onto the porch and settle into the padded porch swing.

~

I lay down on the bench, my head comforted by a big decorative pillow. The warm tears contrast against my icy skin and I should probably go inside before I get sick. I shiver slightly as twilight begins to creep into the atmosphere and I realize I’ve been sitting out here all night. A yawn escapes my mouth and soon I’ve dozed off to sleep.

The sound of a bird chirping annoyingly nearby wakes me. I squint against the rays of light and it doesn’t look like it’s quite noon yet. Sitting up, I stretch and rub my neck where I’ll most definitely have a tiny crick for the rest of the day. For a second, I feel content being able to look at the beach from the comfort of my home. Home. My heart aches all over again as I remember last night.

I slowly and quietly re-enter the house, not wanting to wake Shawn if he’s not up. Creeping around the house, I crack open the door to the bedroom and see that he’s not there. I open it further and enter regularly. Nothing’s gone, or at least not that I can tell. I peep through the blinds and see that his Jeep is gone from the driveway.

Great. I grab the boxes from the spare room and begin dropping all of my things into them. All the important things first, things that I can’t live without and then so on. I’ve got almost all the boxes filled up and ready to go when I hear a door close in the driveway. My entire body tenses up, I’m not ready for a round two of that kind of fighting.

“Y/n?” His honey-smooth voice calls from the front door. I stand still, maybe he’ll leave and then I can leave while he’s gone. “Baby, your car is still in the driveway. I know you’re home.”

I sigh. “Goddamnit,” I whisper to myself before answering slightly louder. “I’m in the spare room!” My eyebrows furrow worriedly as I look around at all my full boxes, I try to start moving them into the closet when he comes through the doorway.

“What are you doing?” Despite knowing he was coming, I still jump in surprise as I back away from the boxes looking guilty. “Are you moving out? After one fight?”

I chew on the inside of my lip angrily. “Excuse me? You’re the one who said you wished you’d never married me so I’m just saving you the trouble,” I say every word dripping in my pain.

He closes his eyes momentarily. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that-“

“But, you did. And you can’t take it back.” My voice wavers slightly.

He steps forward as if to caress my cheek, but I deflect his hand with mine. “I wish I could. I-I didn’t mean it, honey...I promise you that.”

“But, you did,” I mumble sadly. “Because you’re not gonna change your mind about being a dad.” I shrug. “And I’m not gonna change my mind about having kids. At least, not soon enough for you.” Silent tears drip over my eyelashes and run down to my lips. I roll them together as I shakily pull my rings from my finger.

His face crumbles watching me do this. I hold them out to him but he refuses to take them. “Stop it. I’m not leaving you because of this,” he declares. “You just said that you weren’t gonna change your mind soon enough for me. Does that mean you might eventually?”

“I-“ I look at the ceiling before back into his eyes. “God. I don’t know, Shawn. You shouldn’t have to wait for me to be ready when you’re ready now.”

He shakes his head. “I don’t want kids with just anyone. So if I have to wait for you to be ready then I will,” he promises, his voice trembling.

“Shawn-“ I begin tiredly.

“No. No, I know where you’re coming from,” he starts and I stand still, listening. “I’m not gonna ask you to stop doing what you love. And if by the time you’re ready to fully settle down, it’s too late to have our own...we can always adopt.”

The statement surprises me and my mouth parts. He made us seem like the kids had to be biological. “You’d adopt?” He nods, stepping closer and I let him. “Shawn, this was never about me giving up my career or even changing how I do it. I don’t care about traveling the world. I’ve just never...wanted to have my own...”

“Why?” He questions simply.

I sit down on the floor and play with tufts of the carpet. He quickly sits down in front of me, knee to knee. “I’ve just always told myself that I’d rather adopt older kids. There are so many kids who need families and don’t get adopted because they’re not shiny and new. Maybe I’d want to have one of my own someday, but I mainly just want to give love to those who have never had it.”

“Honey,” I look up from the ground at the sound of the loving nickname he’s always called me. “I do not care whether we physically make the kid or not,” he chuckles as he reaches out and strokes my cheek. “I just want a family with you.”

“Really?” He nods.

“And I have the perfect place to start,” he says getting up quickly and moving toward the front of the house.

I stand up and follow suit, my mouth pursed in curiosity. “Shawn, what are you talking about? You didn’t go out and kidnap someone’s kid did you?” I ask, half-joking.

He laughs loudly from the porch and when he re-emerges, he has a little bundle of something curled up in his arms. I stop dead in my tracks. “Is that a-“

“Mhm,” he nods, a proud little smile on his face as he looks down at the puppy in his arms.

“Shawn Peter Raul Mendes! YOU ARE ALLERGIC TO DOGS!” I remind him incredulously.

He shrugs. “This one is supposed to be hypo-allergenic!” He scratches the puppy’s neck delicately and it turns its little muzzle from his chest to look at me.

“Oh my god, give it,” I demand as I reach my arms out and take it from him instantly. I nuzzle my nose against its nose and it licks me all over my face leaving me smelling like puppy breath. Shawn chuckles as I sink to the floor to play with it. “Question.”

He raises his eyebrows as he sits down next to me. “Yeah?”

“You went out and bought a dog as a solution to our fight?” I look at him skeptically. He blushes and seems like he doesn’t know what to say. “You are an excellent problem-solver.” I grin and he breathes a sigh of relief.

He clears his throat. “Adopted, though. She’s from the pound.”

“Aw,” I whimper as I give her lots of kisses. “I know exactly what to name her!” Shawn looks at me expectantly. “Erato, of course.”

“Another muse?” He asks. I nod giddily. “Which one?”

I scoot closer to him and he rests an arm behind my back. “The muse of love poetry. Duh,” I roll my eyes like it should be obvious.

“Duh,” he agrees contently as he presses his wonderful lips to my temple and then rests his head on mine. We both giggle as we watch Erato hop around the living room sniffing her new home.

“Love?” I ask and Shawn lifts his head so I can look at him properly. “After I’m done with the next tour...I wanna start a family with you.”

He beams down at me. “Yeah? Adopted or biological? Know what? Doesn’t even matter!” He stands up excitedly pulling me with him as he laughs loudly. “WE’RE GONNA BE PARENTS!!!” He yells to the empty house causing Erato to bark excitedly.

“Yes, we are,” I say in a baby-talking voice to our puppy. She barks and hops around more. The house fills with tiny barks and loud laughter as Shawn puts on music to celebrate.

He twirls me around and then sways me back and forth with our hips pressed together as Erato pounces at our feet trying to dance with us. I grab Shawn by his jaw and pull him down to meet my lips. We kiss tenderly, deeply appreciating that we could’ve easily lost each other. The kiss was a reminder that we had to communicate and compromise where we could. Hailee was right. We were a team of two against the world.

Our kiss is broken apart by the sound of an adorable whine. We laugh and pick Erato up, her tail wagging ecstatically. Well, a group of three against the world.

For the time being.

Tag List: @imagine-that-100 @hufflepuffshawn @luke2k18  @thewhinersoldier

[amoristt]

Trophies | Peter x Reader

Alternatively: The Halloween Fic I Never Posted

originally this was supposed to be posted on halloween but i’ve been rather stressed lately so i ended up not finishing it until last night! i hope you guys can appreciate it regardless <3

i listened to >this< song while writing this (if you can’t click the link, it’s lorde - ribs ryan hemsworth remix) and i suggest you do too!

reblogs + tags and replies will make my entire day as i put a lot of effort into this :)!

story continues beneath the read more. let me know if you can’t access it!

Trophies

Hours after Halloween had come to an official end, you discovered that you weren’t done with your seemingly unlimited energy. The houses were dim without all the colorful lights, the streets vacant and littered with open candy rappers here and there. If you weren’t dressed in your costume you’d have picked some up and thrown them away, but you had no pockets to work with. Besides, you had your own candy to worry about.

It’d been somewhat of a slow night but it was fruitful, as evident in your dully aching shoulder and cramping wrist. Peter seemed unaffected by the weight of his candy bag, occasionally pulling it open and eagerly grabbing at a random piece and trying to read it through the darkness. Unoriginally upon choosing costumes he went with the one thing he was the most familiar with: Spiderman. At first he was hesitant but when you told him no one knew his identity, therefore making his outfit both compatible AND ironically hilarious, he moved forth with his plans and decided to keep the mask on incase someone realized the material of his suit was a little… too realistic. As the streets cleared out he slid the mask up his face enough to eat varying chocolates, unable to wait for a moment to sit on a bench.

Somewhere in the distance a child called out to her father, the sound followed by an array of giggles and laughter, then a door closing. Silence, and the porch light flickered off. The night had come to an end but you were not disappointed, and neither was Peter. If anything he was as good as can be, eagerly picking out and digging through his bag.

It had been his idea to go trick or treating this year, something you discovered he’d never really had the chance to do. You didn’t have the heart to say no and your decision did not go regretted- he had had so much fun.

“Where should we go?” Peter managed through a mouthful of airheads.

You shrugged, using your free hand to smooth down your messy hair. The night had been thankfully dry (unlike previous years) but windy nonetheless. Once again, Peter didn’t seem to care one bit that upon removing his mask his hair would likely be everywhere in tufts.

Your bag of candy knocked against your upper back and you gave it, moving it off your shoulder to pull out a piece and re-sling it back over. Even more house lights turned off as the two of you passed them by, and you wondered where a fun place would be to relax and hang out before heading back to Peter’s house. “What about that one park you told me about? The one by that sandwich shop you like.”

He blinked at you once or twice before recognition took over. Before he spoke he pulled the just opened sucker from his mouth and said, “Oh, oh right! Yeah we can hang out there for a bit- or just until Aunt May calls me. She was freaked out over the staying out late thing so I said we’d be home before midnight.”

“That’s fine,” You giggled. His Aunt May could be such a worrier. “What time is it anyways?”

“Uuh-” He looked down at a gadget build into his wrist. “About 9:30.”

“Alrighty then, lead the way. You know these roads better than I do.”

The walk was thankfully short, only a few blocks away from where you and Peter currently were upon your decision. Along the mostly vacant roads were a few groups of adults here and there standing around fires, the smell of alcohol thick in the air as you both walked by and awkwardly waved when a few people shouted out drunken ‘hello’s.  

With the park in sight you were delighted to see it was lit up with lamps, making it all the more safer to be a makeshift hang out spot. Not that you needed to extra safety anyways, you were, after all, literally walking along side the Spider Man himself, but if you could avoid a fight that was definitely a good choice. By the time you and Peter arrived, you setting your bag down with an audible huff and him just tossing it to the dirt, it was 9:45 and your legs were aching up a storm. Despite being lopsided and made of an uncomfortable wood, the bench felt like a saving grace. Peter let his mask fall next to him and sighed in relief. 

“Do you still wanna’  trade candy when we get back?” You asked, leaning forward and rubbing at your knees.

“Yeah of course!”

“Hell yeah.”

A comfortable and relaxing silence took it’s place in between you and him, and in the wake of it you leaned back against the bench and stared up. It was a windy and chilly night but there wasn’t a cloud to be seen, the stars shining brightly even with all the buzzing and livelihood of New York. You’d heard from a friend that outside the cities, the stars looked like entire galaxies, and you having grown up in the city with all your relatives blocks away only dreamed to see of it. Sometimes you wished you could be somewhere out in the country lying in some open field, the stars dancing and sparkling brightly.

But, those were future thoughts. Right now you were in a city that never sleeps, and among that you were at an empty park with Peter resting right beside you. A smile shaped on your lips and you sat straight up, looking around. It was a small, dingy park, with a merrygoround, some swings and a miniature play structure. The merrygoround looked inviting, however, so you brought yourself back to your feet.

“Come on.” you urged, holding your hands out for Peter to grab. You led him to the structure, a laugh bubbling out of you as you approached it.

Carefully you stepped onto the platform of the merry go round, eyes widening for just a second as it shook beneath your weight. Like old bones, the bolts and joints creaked but you continued in stepping into the center of the ride and grabbing onto the railings. They traced the outline of the circle with small space in between, then all met in the very center for safety. You crouched alongside one, and this close you could see how the paint chipped and peeled away to reveal what looked like ancient metals.

“Ready?” Peter asked, and you grinned, nodded, and tightened your fingers around the railings.

The spinning started slow at the first, naturally. Slowly the world around you cruised by and then repeated. Every few seconds you saw Peter standing only inches away from the moving ride, hands pushing hard at the same railings you gripped tight.

“Faster!” You chanted as you kicked your legs out from underneath you and sat back against the metal. Thanks to the night's chill it was cold, and it bit against your skin, but you didn’t mind. If anything it felt refreshing in some ways.

As soon as you’d spoke you felt the shoving intensify. The poor merrygoround shook with every forceful push and for a moment you worried that it could possibly just fall apart all together, but as you felt gravity start to tug you outwards those thoughts faded away. “You asked for it!” He taunted in reply, and you laughed gleefully even as your knuckles turned white.

For a brief, capturing moment you sent a glance up to the sky and admired the way the stars looked like they were funneling above you. The movement didn’t allow you to notice each individual twinkle but you knew they were winking anyways at the sight of you and Peter together, playing like teens should, at some no-name park just before 10. Even the crickets seemed to chirp sweeter than usual, egging on the radiant smile you offered the world.

“Had enough?” He spoke over the rides shrill cries, and you tried to manage a glimpse of his face. It was moving too fast- but just in his voice you knew he was watching you untroubled and beaming.

Everything was a blur at this point, and when it would come to a stop your stomach would likely be churning, but you still tipped your head back once again and let out a string of laughter. He was standing idly now, no longer urging the ride faster, so you called out to him. “Jump on!”

“Jump on?” He asked incredulously. “It’s going way too fast for me to just hop on!”

“Do it anyway!”

For a split second he came into view, and then the next time you saw him he was a few feet back. “Alright, here goes-” Before you caught another glimpse the entire ride shook with a great force, the ends rocking back and forth unstably. You cried out but it wasn’t of fear, that wide smile still apparent even through the night’s darkness.

“I think you broke it!” You giggled. As the merrygoround shook it still continued spinning, as did it still continue whining under your now combined weights. Through the gravity of the spinning Peter managed to scoot his way close to you, sitting at your side and gripping tight onto the bar next to his head. His hair was much messier than it had been when the night started, but he seemed so much livelier. The possibility of getting chewed out by his aunt May was only a distant memory, the fears of potentially running into a villain even further.

“Knew you could do it,” Once again your eyes found their way up to the sky. “Don’t the stars look cool?”

Peter too fixed his gaze up at the swirling moon-lit sky, and a soft silence (filled by only the ride’s creaking) took over. He smiled beside you and leaned back to let his head rest against the bar. “This is making me so dizzy.” he mumbled, and you nudged his arm.

“Weakling. They do look awesome though, don’t they?”

Peter shrugged. “I guess I uh-.. Never really thought about it.”

“Seriously?” You casted him a skeptical glance, one that he did not meet. “I’d have thought with your whole nerdy stuff you’d be all over stars.”

“Well, no, I mean I know a lot about stars. I just never really… Appreciate them I guess.”

You brought your knees up to your chest, heels pressed hard against the metal to assure you wouldn’t slide down and hit the wood chips. Peter seemed different suddenly, a little more mellow than he had been just seconds ago. Something was on his mind.

“You should.” The ride trembled beneath your body, and you leaned back. “Appreciate them more, I mean.”

“I know.” Peter sighed, closing his eyes, and you wondered if it was possible for Spiderman to get motion sickness. “Everything’s just been so crazy lately you know? With school, and the Avengers.”

Tentatively you unhooked a hand from the bar and rested it on top of his. “Well, nothing's going on right now, right?”

For a moment he looked back down at you, a strange distant yet affectionate glimmer in his eyes, but he soon turned his attention back to the constellations overhead. He sighed and slumped his shoulders. “Guess you’re right. I’ve been missing out on a lot, lately.”

“But you’re Spiderman,” You blurted. “You’ve gotten to do so much cool stuff like meet Tony and save people. You stole Captain America’s shield. Not everyone can say that.”

Peter shrugged dully. “I know. I just don’t really feel like I’m doing things normal kids should be doing.”

You frowned. “But… You’re not normal.”

He just nodded down at his lap, and a sinking feeling started taking its spot in your gut.

“Hey,” You brushed your elbow against his own, a halfhearted attempt to push him from whatever thoughts were starting to eat away at him. “If you’re worried about missing out on things then don’t worry. We’ve got plenty of time to do stupid stuff.”

A lopsided smile graced his features, and he let out something between a sigh and a meaningful deep breath. “Star gazing is stupid?”

“No,” You tilted your head from side to side. “But staying out late to mess around a park? I think so.”

“Right,” He nodded, laughing quietly under his breath. “Speaking of that we should probably get going, I don’t wanna freak out Aunt May.”

By that moment the ride had started to lose its previous momentum, now only idly spinning at a much less nauseating speed. Though you’d much rather have sat there with him all night, you removed your hand from his own, and made your way scooting down to the edge of the circle. The moment you hopped off you were struck with dizziness, a strange lead-like weight holding your legs down. It took you a few moments to get your balance back, and thanks to Peter’s supportive hand taking a quick rest between your shoulder blades, you were able to walk like normal again.

“Almost tipped over there for a second.” You laughed, stretching your arms broadly with a yawn. You picked your candy bag up from the ground and let it take its place back over your shoulder, that same dull ache already starting to reform the instant it did so.

“You know,” Peter grabbed his own candy bag and brushed off his suit with his other hand. “We should come here again sometime. Maybe a bit earlier though since-”

“Aunt May?” You rose a brow teasingly.

He sheepishly grinned and looked down for a second. “Yeah.”

“We should totally come here again earlier next time. Other places too. Gotta get some stupid things in there.”

At your words Peter laughed, eyes closing for a second before he looked back out ahead. “We’re going to end up getting in trouble somehow, I know it.”

“You bet we are.”

Like before the streets were vacant. Even by now the groups of drunken adults had dispersed, some scattered voices in backyards calling out goodnights and goodbyes to one another. A truck started up, took off, and then there was silence. It wasn’t uncomfortable, however. You stared down at the ground as you walked, wondering what kind of movie you and him would want while you ate yourselves sick on candy like kids did.

It had never really occurred to you that Peter felt somewhat… Alienated from his age group. He’d always seemed to adamant about being more mature than his age, capable of handling things well beyond his pay grade. Being upset over ‘missing out’ on being a silly teen made you feel in the dark. It made sense in some way, he was out doing things in secret that hardly anyone else would relate too, and in order to do so you knew he’d sacrificed so many social outings he wished he could’ve attended.

The candy in your bag nudged against each other with every step, and you smiled when you heard him once again reach inside and pull a piece out to snack on.

To you the bag felt like a weight. It made your arms ache, your wrist cramping with the constant position, but to Peter it was likely an entirely different story. It made sense why he seemed more than happy to plow through nearly a quarter of his bag before you and him finally made it to his home.

A simple bag of candy from a fun, childish night probably felt like a trophy to him.