#me and vee are very silly

[vermwerm]

hiii made another crackfic

[voxkisser]

As much as I love how shitty he is, I love thinking about helping him become less insecure with himself and letting him stop his act he puts on the entire day when in public. I don't think he'll ever stop being terrible because that's just how he is but I love the thought of showing him real love and helping him get over some of his insecurities and become (somewhat) better even if it's just around me. He really just needs me to love him

[eclaire-went-bam]

hiii:33!! friendly reminder that someone can enjoy a character that has done heinous things and not support said heinous things

usually when a character does Bad Things in a narrative (espec if they're not the protagonist) it is Portrayed As Bad so people who enjoy the character Likely Know They Are Bad

& either way harassing people over enjoying a fictional character is just really childish

if you don't like the character, that is perfectly valid. but there's never any reason to characterise everyone who likes said character as Evil, and/or imply they condone the character's negative actions.

also sometimes i look at internet discourse and it's like people want morally grey characters but then turn around when "morally grey" is not always "i have my own rules but i still make all the right choices !!" some of y'all just need to admit you just like good characters that's fine not everyone is into the spice it's ok to like that good protagonist energy

;;;not saying every character i'm referring to fits in that "morally grey" category, some are just evil villains, but even then i'm sorry 90% of ur stories wouldn't exist without them. they drive the plot.

[tvrningout-a]

i should've switched to writing original stuff ages ago bc i could've been overcoming writer's block if i did :' )

[pawterpillart]

Platonic, queerplatonic or romantic vee?

The struggle is real.

[dyns33]

Symbiosis

I missed Eddie x reader with silly Venom being in the way. Can't wait to see what they'll do in the next movie.

From the beginning of their relationship, Y/N had noticed that there was something different with Eddie.

She might have thought that it was because he was somewhat famous that he behaved eccentrically, sometimes talking to himself and seeming very agitated for no reason.

Without ever really bringing up these oddities, Eddie had been very honest with her about a lot of things. His childhood, his dreams, his ex-girlfriend, the loss of his job before becoming a journalism star again, his little problems with cleanliness.

"I mean, I'm a very clean person… Normally. All the time ! I wash twice a day, I take care of my teeth, I don't like living in filth but... Sometimes I'm not at home for a long time, and I'm totally focused on my job, and the stress… So, if I can seem a little dirty and messy, I'm sorry, I will never ask you to clean up for me and you can tell me that I stink by patting me on the back of the head. Yes, on the back of the head, I deserve it." Eddie muttered at the end of his sentence, looking to the side as if he were talking to someone else.

"I don't think you're dirty. You sweat a little sometimes, but that's natural."

“You’re saying that because you haven’t seen my apartment yet.”

“Does that mean you want to invite me to your apartment ?” Y/N asked, smiling shyly.

"Of course ! No, you don't… Of course, Y/N, I've been wanting to for a long time."

The presence of chickens was a little surprising, and it was true that the apartment was not in very good condition, but it was a bit like her idea of a bachelor pad, and it was quite reassuring to think that Eddie didn't often bring women home.

It meant something important to him, a sign of trust.

But that certainly wasn't the greatest evidence. No, this evidence took a little longer to emerge from the shadows, or from Eddie's shoulder, after a month of relationship.

Precisely the day he couldn't hold back the first "I love you."

The spontaneous, charming statement came in the middle of the small talk, and Y/N felt very happy, ready to respond that she loved him too.

It was then that the thing appeared between them, looking furious, showing its large teeth.

"No ! Eddie, no, you can't do that !"

“Oh, God, what is that ?!”

"Vee ! Vee, you promised me, man ! You're going to scare her ! And you have no right to interfere in my love affairs, go back inside ! Y/N, sorry, I'm really sorry, I’ll explain !”

“I have the right to give my opinion !” the creature replied, turning to Eddie. "You're ashamed of me, of us ! Anne accepted us ! Anne likes us ! If your new little darling doesn't accept us, then she's not good enough !"

“Anne didn’t really have a choice and we weren’t together anymore, stop talking about her all the time !”

After more or less managing to calm down the "non-parasite" that lived inside him, Eddie did his best to calm down Y/N, who was totally freaked out by what had just happened. He explained to her that Venom was an alien, a symbiote, who needed him to survive, who had helped him on numerous occasions, and who was not dangerous.

"I'm very dangerous ! I'm the lethal protector !"

"What does he mean ?"

"Nothing ! Well, he likes to fight crime, he's dangerous to the bad guys. You have absolutely nothing to fear, I promise. I… I'm so sorry."

Eddie then began to sob, despite all the comfort that Vee tried to give him by telling him that only losers cried like children and that he was pathetic to moan like that, putting them to serious shame.

Even though she was still scared, Y/N couldn't help but hug her boyfriend, trying her best not to touch the alien. She repeated to him that everything was fine, that it wasn't his fault, and that even though this situation was strange, she still wanted to be with him.

This seemed to reassure him, and make him very happy.

Unfortunately, there were three of them in this relationship, and Venom clearly didn't want to be with Y/N at all.

It was him that Eddie had been mumbling to since they met, often arguing about her, as the alien kept comparing her to Anne, his ex girlfriend.

Without any sign of lying in his eyes, he promised her that he hadn't been in love with her for a long time. Their breakup had been difficult, but she had found someone very quickly, Dan, a great guy, and they were married now, and Eddie was very happy for them.

Well, that wasn't easy to believe with Venom growling and hitting his host's head at the end of every sentence, insulting Dan and repeating how great Anne was.

But Eddie seemed really honest. He was friends with his ex, nothing more, and he wanted to be with Y/N now, even if his idiot parasite didn't agree.

He wasn't an optimist by nature, too much had happened to him in life for him to believe in miracles, but Eddie wanted to believe that Vee would come to appreciate her.

He was quite confident as Y/N was doing her best with the symbiote, trying to talk to him, offering him chocolate, keeping an open mind. Many people would have fled the moment they saw this thing coming out of his body. It was quite a good sign.

But like a wild animal, Venom refused to be coaxed. He wanted Anne, Anne was perfect. Nothing would change his mind. Nothing.

"He hates me." Y/N whispered sadly, even though she knew it was useless, because Venom was always with Eddie, even when she couldn't see him. None of their conversation was private.

"Hate is a strong word… He's stubborn, he believes he's right. It's not really against you. If I had always been single, I think he would adore you."

Eddie thought it would be a good idea to introduce her to Anne. In a sense he was right, because it was evident that there was no longer any romantic feeling between them, and that she was very much in love with her husband.

But Y/N couldn't help but do like Venom, and compare herself to the other woman. Beautiful, intelligent, great lawyer with a strong character. It seemed natural to fall for her.

If he sensed her discomfort, the journalist said nothing, spending the evening laughing with the other couple only keeping his hand on her shoulder, putting it back each time Venom forced him to take it off. He was kind enough not to ask her what she had thought of Anne, or if she was reassured. Maybe he was afraid of the answer too.

After that, things got a little complicated. Without doing it on purpose, Y/N put some distance between them. To protect herself, because she only thought of one thing.

One day, Eddie was going to listen to Venom. One day, he was going to see that even if he no longer loved Anne, he could find someone better, and he was going to leave her.

Well, the alien still had contradictory messages. If Y/N sucked, Eddie sucked too. A loser. When he wasn't busy asking for food or criticizing the young woman, he was insulting his poor host.

And if she ended up not listening to what he said about her, only caring about her boyfriend's opinion, she didn't like it at all that Venom treated Eddie so badly.

"No." she said one day, sitting on the sofa, while the journalist was still arguing with the alien for some stupid reason, before throwing up his arms and agreeing to go buy chocolate and tatter tots to calm him down.

"…Uh ? Sorry, Y/N, are you talking to me ?"

"You're not going out."

"Uh. I'll just go to Madam Cheng's. It'll only take a few minutes."

"Venom doesn't deserve chocolate. You stay here, watch the movie with me, and if he apologizes, then he gets some sugar."

“How dare you, stupid woman ?!” the symbiote shouted, showing all its teeth to scare her.

But Y/N wasn’t afraid anymore. Even though he was rude and mean, he had promised Eddie that he would never hurt her, and he seemed to be an alien of words. Aside from his screams, he had nothing against her.

“You, how dare you ?!” she replied, jumping off the couch, which seemed to surprise both Eddie and the symbiote. "I don't care what you think or say about me. I understand that you don't like me, that I'm not good enough, and you know what ? I agree ! Eddie deserves better than me. But he deserves better than you too ! You're an asshole to him ! I forbid you from talking to him like that, or breaking his nose, even if you fix him right after ! He's a great host, you should thank him and do everything to make him happy."

It was stupid, but she started crying as she spoke. Emotions tended to make her cry, even anger. At the silence of her boyfriend and her non-parasite, Y/N felt bad.

She then had the stupid instinct to go lock herself in the bathroom, to try to calm down and remember how to breathe.

From the other side of the door, she heard whispers, but was unable to tell what they were saying.

Then Eddie knocked gently, asking if he could come in, or if she would come out.

"… He's going to apologize ?"

"Yes, I promise."

Trying her tears to not give Venom another reason to make fun of her, Y/N opened shyly, not daring to look at her boyfriend right away, and stood stupidly in front of him, waiting.

“Vee…”

“I’m sorry, brave little morsel.”

"Hmm ? Oh. No, I meant an apology for Eddie."

“He already apologized, love.”

"I don't need him to apologize to me. He meant what he said, and like I said… He's not wrong. But it's nice."

"Little morsel…" Venom whispered, moving closer to her and looking almost sad. "I was totally wrong. I see it now. Eddie explained it to me, but I wasn't listening."

With Eddie translating what he said, the alien explained that for his species, symbiosis was important. They could have several hosts, but there was only one perfect symbiosis, just one.

Part of him wanted to keep his host to himself, jealous and possessive, but that wasn't possible, because contrary to what his attitude seemed to show, he cared about Eddie's happiness.

That was why he was so insistent that he return to Anne. Because from the memories he had seen of his relationship, he had seemed to be in perfect symbiosis with Anne, and since there was only perfect symbiosis, then he had to do everything to get her back, even if she was married to stupid Dan.

He didn’t hate Y/N. It really wasn't personal, it was just logic and survival instinct.

What Venom failed to understand was that human relationships weren't like symbiosis. And in the end, if he had to compare the two, it was now obvious that Eddie's perfect match was with Y/N.

Yes, his ex had helped them, and she would help them again if necessary. But so did Y/N, who had accepted Eddie's special situation, who had stayed despite the horrible things Venom had said, who protected her lover and tried to please the alien.

"Babe…" Eddie sighed, taking her hands. “If anyone is too good for anyone else here, it’s you.”

"He's right."

"… Thank you Vee."

"But you always say she's too good for you. Once we agree, you might be happy !"

"Eddie… You're saying that ?"

"Of course. I still don't know how I managed to seduce you, or why you didn't run away when you saw Vee, or what I did to deserve that such a great girl could think that she's in love with a guy like…"

He jumped a little when she kissed him to stop him from saying any more nonsense, but Eddie quickly relaxed, clinging to her, pinning her against the wall to accentuate the kiss.

Right in their ears they could hear Venom purring in pleasure. They didn't mind until he licked their cheeks.

"Vee ! It's disgusting !"

"You're not listening to me ! I'm telling you to get into bed ! You're going to hurt Y/N if you stay here. A Lady should be caught in satin sheets, surrounded by rose petals, after foreplay of at least twenty minutes, and satisfied several times."

"… What ?!"

"I really like this idea. Eddie, where are my rose petals and at least twenty minutes of foreplay ?"

"Y/N ! Don't team up against me, please !"

"I can help him with endurance. And the rest. I've seen a lot of videos."

"… Okay ! Remind me to take care of my internet history tomorrow morning."

"Yeah, yeah. Less talk, more passion. Little morsel is waiting, I can feel it, and she's ovulating."

"… Aren't you supposed to go get chocolate from Madam Cheng ?"

"Yes ! And I will take the opportunity to explain for the hundredth time why there are things that should not be said."

“But Y/N is wet.”

"And here we go !"

Despite Eddie's explanations, Venom continued to want to give advice and do everything to make his relationship with Y/N perfect.

After all, he had almost ruined everything, so he felt he had an obligation to help these two idiots be happy, living in harmony and understanding what to do to satisfy the other in every situation.

Even if Eddie was already a caring and kind boyfriend, who Y/N didn't want to leave at all despite this little characteristic.

That said, after the alien took the initiative to help with his tongue once, she wasn't really complaining about it.

[liliannadelaphinehartifelt]

Alastor - [ CATCH IT ON CAMERA ]

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This was originally a silly little fluff piece that turned into….well, this. I hope you all got the vibe from the song cause it doesn't get more straightforward than that…

WARNINGS: [ MDNI ] + [ NSFW ] + [ FEM READER ] + [ BUBBLY READER ] + [ IMPLIED SMUT ]

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Taking a polaroid picture with Alastor!!

That was the goal when you stroll into his room with the brightest smile as he sits reading alone late one night.

Your lover doesn't initially suspect what you're up to.

He’s very content with reading as you go about your antics as quietly as possible.

Alastor was perfectly unbothered by your presence at first, used to your soft giggles filling the room and quietly enjoying the jovial aura you emit.

It's only when he hears a distinct ‘click’ of a camera that he stiffens in his seat.

The sharp and quiet sound caused his ears to twitch, claws digging into the leather cover of the book he held, and his red eyes peered over the edge to see the source of the interruption.

You peer back up at him, smiling softly from your spot on the carpeted floor.

The tiny polaroid camera in your dainty hands holds his attention, probably combusting into flames in another universe by the look on his face, but you grasp it tight in hopes it'll stay intact.

“What's that infernal thing doing here?” he snarls quietly, attempting to stay calm as your eyes soften on him, silently begging the stag to be kind.

Though his patience is thin, he withholds his hateful rant about technology to hear you out.

“A little imp sold it to me, and I just couldn't say no, Allie! It takes wonderful pictures too and…and I've always wanted one..” your voice trembled a little, afraid he'd outright scold you.

Alastor seriously considered doing so until he spotted the array of Polaroid prints you'd already taken and left to dry on the carpet.

You had some of yourself. Posing freely in each one, and every frame he laid his eyes on was strangely adorable, with a few mildly scandalous, in his opinion.

Alastor then caught sight of the few you'd taken of him, all off-guard shots, clearly taken at a distance as if not to disturb him.

Those, in particular, had your lipstick print on them, tender kisses you'd placed there as a silly add-on of affection for him, and his tail twitched in amusement at the minuscule detail.

“Let me see it, darling,” he held a clawed hand out, book now resting in his lap, and his posture more relaxed than a moment ago.

Hesitant at first, you hand him the camera, silently hoping he'd refrain from destroying it. You are pleasantly surprised when he shows no indication of doing so.

“Hmm..”

Alastor inspected the device thoroughly, eyes narrowed as he searched for any signs of the Vees’ technology, but there was no evidence of their tampering whenever he looked.

He still took the precaution of asking you directly, “It's not one of their devices, is it?”

You shift to sit on your knees, not having to ask who he's referring to, “No. Not that I know of…” you answer truthfully.

Alastor hums, seeing no trace of deceit in your expression and having no reason not to believe you; he hands the camera back.

You take it with a gracious smile, absolutely over the moon that he let you have it back, “You may keep it… but any picture you take is only shown to me. Have I made myself clear, dear?”

You nod eagerly, happy to have the camera back and not bothered by his stipulation.

”Okay, Allie!” You chirp, contently fiddling with it again, giggling as you take more silly pictures of yourself.

Alastor watches as you do, following your body as you roll around the floor leisurely, posing provocatively here and there.

It almost annoys him how good you look, acting childish and carefree, barely trying to keep his attention, and moderately unaware of how badly he wanted yours.

The book in his lap was no longer enjoyable, lacking the entertainment you provided, and his focus was permanently on you.

If only you'd put that dammed camera down….

Alastor narrowed his eyes, smile tightening as you rolled onto your back to take a particularly racey photograph of yourself, sporting a rather lewd expression he'd only seen you make amid pleasure he induced.

His eye twitched as you snapped the picture, unable to look away as you stuck your tongue out and winked seductively, tilting your head to get a better angle and inadvertently directing your face towards him.

The stag grunted an obscenity as you eyed him innocently from below, head cocking to the side in curiosity as to why he seemed so stiff.

“Am I bothering you?” Your gaze softens, twinges of shyness seething in at the thought of annoying the overlord, and you braced yourself for him to answer with a curt ‘yes.’

That answer never came.

Alastor remained silent, staring intently at you before reaching a hand out to caress one side of your face.

His touch was cold, a chilled contrast to the heat rising on your cheeks as his claws trailed down your skin, stopping once he reached the curve of your jaw.

Your lips slightly opened, a soft gasp escaping them as his sharp nails ghosted over you. He gripped your chin and chuckled as your instinct to relax in his hold kicked in.

“You're not bothering me at all, dear. I have a request in mind. That's all.” he lowered his voice, unconsciously lessening its static as you hummed quietly in response.

Your eyes fluttered closed, face nuzzling into his palm as you rolled to lay on your front, leaving the camera on the floor near your waist. Your feet kicked up, lace stocking-clad legs lazily swinging as he cupped your face gently, careful not to scratch your soft skin with his claws.

For a brutal overlord to be so tender was unfathomable to most, but you counted yourself lucky to have encountered one.

You basked in his touch for a moment, slowly lifting your gaze to his heavily clouded one, “Is it somethin’ I can help with, Allie?” you asked him quietly, giving a small smile as he scratched his nails under your chin affectionately.

Alastor chuckled, seeing your blush intensify at his gesture, a reaction he'd yet to tire of bringing out of you.

“Yes, you can help, but you'll have to promise to keep it a secret between us, little one. Can you do that?”

His deliberate cooing made your heart melt, every bone in your body buzzing with delight as he coaxed you into secrecy.

“Okay…I won't tell a soul. I promise..” you nearly whine, dying of anticipation and needing much more physical touch than he was giving you now.

“Come to me then, darling,” he barely finishes the command before you slide onto his lap with a giddy smile.

You settle down on him comfortably, straddling his lower half and unafraid to relax against his chest.

Alastor grunts as your body meets his, momentarily distracted by the pressure you impose on his hardening cock, but quickly averts his attention back to his previous train of thought as you tug at the lapels of his pristine overcoat impatiently.

You pout while he raises a brow at you, clearly unamused by your bratty gesture, “I wanna know now…” your expression turns sour, a dramatic showcase he can't help but laugh at before snapping his fingers to conjure the item you left on the floor.

“I'd like to take a picture with you, dear,” he explains causally, and you blank at the statement, having to process the bizarre concept of the Radio Demon of all beings wanting to associate himself with a camera…

Willingly at that…

“R-really,” you squeak out, confused but gradually excited by the prospect.

Alastor peered at the camera in his hand, pricking the newly printed photo you took a moment ago from the bottom slot, holding the picture up to admire its details.

You blushed seeing him study your downright slutty behavior taken in one snapshot.

Though you were a little embarrassed, he seemed amused rather than disgusted.

“I'd like to recapture you making this exact face. You wouldn't mind posing like that for me again, right little doe?”

He articulates the demand as a light-hearted question, fixed grin shifting to a closed smile as he hummed lowly at your timid nod of agreement seconds later.

Your silent compliance isn't enough for the stag, his hips rutting up into you forcefully to prompt a verbal answer, and you give it through a trembling moan.

“N-no, I don't mind at all…”

The pitch in your voice rises, shocks of pleasure igniting in your core from the feeling of his prominent hard-on brushing against your clothed slit.

An immediate patch of your slick forms on the thin fabric that keeps your mound hidden.

Alastor snakes an arm around your waist, holding you close with a toothy grin reappearing on his face, sharp teeth grazing your ear as he whispers into it.

“You’ll put on a show for me, yes?” you nod quickly, unable to help yourself from grinding down on him for more friction,

“Yes..” you purr, helpless as ever, when a deep laughter thunders in his chest at your reflexive response.

“Then smile, my dear! I don't want to miss a single second of your darling reactions..” he held you still as his free hand lifted the camera, capturing the split second his head shifted downward, finding the most sensitive area on your neck and marking it with ease.

You shivered against him, feeling the smirk on his lips as the crisp click of the camera’s flash going off mixed with your startled moan.

He‘d certainly have a grand time with you and your new little trinket.

And you'd accomplished much more than achieving your goal of getting one picture with him…

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Sometimes, I think I'm incapable of writing fluff. It's almost a curse at this point…

NO TAGS: 🚫

[ BONUS CONTENT + ]

The song in this edit used to annoy the shit out of me but ill let it slide this ONE time cause its Alastor…. Credits to creator ❤️

[redr0sewrites]

Can you write Vox x reader where like the reader just says like really unhinged things and just like vile things whenever they rage and stuff like the internet could be slow or smth and the reader is just like “IM GOING TO RIP OFF MY SKIN” idk man I’m kinda just self projecting rn like you can right anything with it tbh idk sorry for rambling anyway you don’t have to do this if you don’t wanna

THIS IS SO MEEEEE I LOVE THIS IDEA SM!!! sorry it took me a hot minute to reply to this i have over 70 hazbin hotel requests in my inbox 😭

🥀Cw: fluff, crack, silly vox

when he first met you, vox was charmed by your seemingly sweet nature- that is, until you were pissed

your unholy screech of how you were going to rip off your skin if he cut the wifi again was both endearing and confusing in his eyes

vox would just short circuit for a second, just blinking at you while he tries to process what you just said

once it clicks, he just starts giggling. vox very rarely genuinely laughs, most of his laughs are professional or part of the persona he adopts as the leader of vox enterprises, but when he's so shocked by what you just said, he can't control the booming laughter thay fills the room

he's wheezing and gasping, each barking laugh only pissing you off more

"what's so funny? if you keep laughing i am going to fucking break ur fingers like carrot sticks!" you snap, and vox only giggles harder

after a few seconds, you can't help but notice how adorable his laughter is, and soon you don't mind it as much

once you two are officially together, you notice how stressed vox often is, yet how he seems to visibly relax around you

the batshit crazy things you say, which normally disgusts other people, only seem to amuse him

its actually a wonderful dynamic because you bring some spontaneity and slight insanity into vox's otherwise irritating and depressing lifestyle, and vox balances out the crazy things you say and calms you down every time

you often find yourself searching for new phrases to baffle him with, and for new ways to make him laugh

after vox has a stressful day, he enjoys just listening to you ramble about the most insane things and adores hearing whatever fucked up saying you've adopted recently

vox notices himself beginning to copy your speech patterns. he only begins to realize when he slips in an exceptionally odd metaphor into a work meeting and everyone stares at him, yet his heart skips a beat at the thought

there's something so charming to him about the fact that he's adopting your mannerisms, and you truly make him laugh when no one else can

whenever another one of the vees pisses him off, he always comes to you for advice on incredibly deranged comebacks, and you never disappoint!

he's won multiple arguments by just repeating one of your fucked up sayings and the other vees being too lowkey shocked to disagree

vox LOVES IT when you diss people he hates, hearing you ramble some fucked up insults about alastor made him fall in love with you all over again

"that worm on a string fucked up karen cut bob looking ass- if i see him around here again im going to eat a fucking brick" *cue vox looking at you with the biggest heart eyes*

overall, you are both menaces, but you're menaces in love ♥️

vox lay with his head in your lap, the blue light of his screen illuminating the dim room as you rambled mindlessly about your day.

"and THEN, this fucking asshole tried to flirt with me! ME!! as if he doesn't know were dating! ugh, it makes me feel like i have an entire beehive living beneath my skin. i swear if he even looks at me again im going to lick wet cement i can NOT deal. how can you even work with him? he's such a fucking CREEP voxy, i'm going to cut off those ugly ass wings and shove them so far down his throat- hey, are you even listening?"

you look down to see vox half asleep, his eyelids drooping as his light dimmed. "keep talking.." he murmurs, looking up at you with a lazy smile on his face. "you're my favorite person t' listen to.."

i love the idea of vox with a partner who challenges his very idea of power. he clearly wraps himself in a sort of persona, surrounding himself with powerful people and acting like he's so serious and important. i love the idea of him falling in love with someone who can break down his walls in seconds, someone who can dismantle his entire bravado act and who allows him to truly be himself. this is such a wonderful prompt and i am eating this up. nonnie ur awesome!!!!

[baldval]

do you also do polyamorous things? could we have romantic headcanons with the vee's and a very childish reader? (sorry, I'm very silly!!!)

would prefer a gn!reader, but fem or male is always fine too!

if you don't do poly things, then just velvette is fine!

-🍋 anon

DATING THE VEES HEADCANONS!₊˚⊹♡

characters: velvette, valentino, vox, x gn!reader (poly)

warnings: cursing, nfsw headcanons later on.

a/n: i respect all ships, but personally i am a firm believer of poly!vees and, obviously, love this request!!!!

SFW:

ʚɞ without fail, vox would be the one to wake up eary and make breakfast for all of you.

ʚɞ "you're all so fucking lazy, perhaps you could try to do something?"

ʚɞ secretly, he loves to cook.

ʚɞ he'll never admit to it but you all know it.

ʚɞ as vox's alarm wakes you all up, velvette gives both valentino and you sweet good morning kisses.

ʚɞ meanwhile, valentino grumbles something into the soft flesh of your thigh.

ʚɞ very much not a morning person.

ʚɞ vox is used to hammering away for hours alone in his office, but he’d be lying if he said it didn’t get a bit lonely.

ʚɞ would be delighted to find you and velvette lingering to spend time with him and watching him work.

ʚɞ whereas valentino is pretty much the exact opposite.

ʚɞ 'clingy' is an understatement.

ʚɞ constantly all over the both of you.

ʚɞ genuinely doesn't matter who is around, he will hold your waist and plant a kiss on your lips natural as anything.

ʚɞ a hand on your hip as he hugs velvette by her shoulder.

ʚɞ "come on vox, you've been in there for hours." you whine

ʚɞ "i'll be done in a minute darling."

ʚɞ when she's between work, velvette loves to experiment with novel ideas for her clothing line.

ʚɞ often shows new things to you first to get your opinion.

ʚɞ one day you asked her to teach you how to sew, to which she answered with such excitement it was almost to the point of giddy.

ʚɞ val loves it when he's working and you just enter his office and sit on his legs.

ʚɞ his arms surrounding your figure.

ʚɞ vox loves when you play helpless damsel with little things, even when he knows you're exaggerating.

ʚɞ enjoys seeing you struggle

ʚɞ and when you give him puppy eyes.

ʚɞ watches you with a loving smirk.

ʚɞ "let me take care of it, darling"

ʚɞ you all love riling vox up when you know he has somewhere to be.

ʚɞ "what if we made out right now? would you still want to leave?" you tease.

ʚɞ he’s embarrassingly affected by your kisses and caresses.

ʚɞ and how you all always manage to make him late.

NSFW:

ʚɞ velvette tends to be a very rough and demanding top.

ʚɞ topping velvette is rare, but absolutely a glorious experience to be a part of.

ʚɞ whereas vox is much more giving.

ʚɞ he still needs praise tho.

ʚɞ "you look so good on top of me, it's amazing".

ʚɞ "hmm... please- keep doing that."

ʚɞ valentino is the textbook definition of a power bottom.

ʚɞ he's always the one to get impatient and jealous during sex.

ʚɞ especially when velvette or vox are taking up too much of you for too long.

ʚɞ "hurry up," he'd mumble while sucking at the skin of your neck.

ʚɞ but velvette ignores him, her mouth steadfastly doing the lord's work between your legs.

ʚɞ she's fond of the brat but not about to rush your pleasure over it.

ʚɞ besides, she know you all can think of a few better ways to shut valentino up.

[velvette-creations]

Hurt So Good

Hazbin Hotel: The Vees x fem!reader 

Rating: Explicit 

WC: 1.4 k 

Prompt: Exhaustion for @sweetspicybingo (Hurt/Comfort Bingo Collection)

Warnings: Overstimulation, oral (f and m receiving), sex work, mentions of bondage and voyeurism, anal, threesome, some solid aftercare, reader is a fox/demon hybrid inspired by a very minor character on the show

Summary: Being involved with the Vees has its perks 

Your indigo fluffy tail swished, tickling the bare skin of the giant bull, pounding you from behind as drool pooled down the corners of your mouth. It dripped down the shiny pink ball gag strapped around your mouth and splattered on the sheets below. You clenched around him before soaking his cock. Valentino was delighted to nail the money shot in one take and quickly called cut since he was satisfied. You were thankful it had been an easy night. Once Frank slipped out of you, you rolled onto your back and blew him a kiss; your fox ears twitched before you rolled off the bed.

You pushed onto your tiptoes as you stretched. It might not have been a long night, but it had been exhausting. Your muscles constantly ached after an intense bondage scene, and a hot bath sounded so good right now.

“Baby, you were wonderful tonight, simply on fire,” Valentino purred, beckoning you over to him with a crooked finger.

You were still bare, covered in spunk, but you approached him, perching on his knee. “Thanks, Val,” you beamed. You learned quickly it was better to be on his good side.

“And here I thought Angel was my star. I think it might be you,” he cooed, scratching under your chin and making your tail wag.

“Nah, Angel is a diamond. He’s experienced. I’m just a novice at best, like cheap plastic jewelry,” you mumbled.

You jumped in Val’s lap as you felt a cable sneak up your back before lightly wrapping around your throat.

“Now, now, you wouldn’t be talking about my best girl in such a manner. That simply won’t do,” Vox’s voice purred.

“Silly me, just ignore my ramblings. I’m tired,” you said sheepishly, using a furry paw to cover up a yawn.

“You’re working her too hard, Val,” Vox chided, releasing the cable around your throat before setting his chilled hand against your back and nuzzling your shoulder. Soft shocks of electricity burst over your skin.

“The minions can’t get enough of her. I’m simply giving into popular demand,” Val reasoned.

Vox pulled away momentarily, then draped a silk robe around you.  “Well, she’s done for tonight, so let’s take care of her.”

Once your robe was belted around your waist, Valentino scooped you into his arms and carried you into the private quarters of the Vees. You hung tightly to his neck, always forgetting how tall he was. He placed you on the velvet couch and soon you had a lapful of Velvette as she perched her petite body in your lap, covering your face with kisses.

“My favorite foxy girl,” she purred, stroking your ears tenderly, and you felt like you could melt.

You fluttered your lashes, your eyes slowly drooping close as the exhaustion set in your bones. Velvette’s gentle pets were enough to lull you to sleep, but you longed for one last thrill to push you over the edge. To be tugged over the tidal wave, sending you crashing into orgasmic bliss before succumbing to sweet, serene slumber. Your muzzle pressed against Vel’s warm cheek.

“I wanna taste you,” you whispered, your claws furling around her skirt.

“Mmm, that sounds rather lovely to me, foxy girl. Go on then,” she encouraged, her fingers moving through your silky hair as you removed her skirt and panties.

You pressed your palm between her slender thighs, soaking up her wet arousal before taking hold of her hips. She was petite enough to manipulate easily, and you enjoyed making her come undone. You stretched out on the couch before lowering her to your face, your tongue eagerly swiping over her dripping slit. Her hitched moan was music to your ears, spurring you on to eat her out like a starving dog. Her cunt was delicious and warm, sweet nectar dancing against your tongue as you brought her to orgasm, feeling her shiver in your tight grasp as she squirmed against your face.

“My, what a show,” Vox hummed, stroking his hard-on through his tight trousers.

Your claws dug into her tender backside as she rode out her orgasm, grinding against your face until she went limp in your grasp. Your tongue eagerly lapped her clean, savoring every drop before removing her from her seat upon your face.

“Oh fuck me,” Velvette groaned, a broad smile dancing on her face in the aftermath.

“Our little vixen always knows how to satisfy,” Valentino smirked, pink smoke billowing around him as he sauntered to you, cupping your face before his long tongue snaked in your mouth.

One gloved hand caressed the black horns on top of your head as Velvette straddled your stomach.

“Come join us, Voxxy,” she piped up, waving him over.

You watched through heavy-lidded eyes as Vox removed Velvette’s top and bra, his metal fingers tweaking her pebbled nipples. Val pulled away from the sloppy, wet kiss, moving behind your head as he freed his cock. You felt Velvette’s weight slip from your body as Vox maneuvered you so you were on all fours. Val’s weighted cock slapped against your lips, making you shiver, opening your mouth to take him in. Vevlette straddled your back, taking hold of your fluffy tail, lifting it out of the way as her delicate fingers stroked your dripping, swollen cunt, preparing you for Vox.

You felt stuffed full as Vox sunk deep inside you while Val’s cock filled your mouth. Velvette’s slicked fingers played with the tight pucker of your ass, creating a makeshift plug as you gave into all the wonderful feelings, allowing them to use you like a little fuck toy. A sharp snap of Vox’s hips. Velvette’s tender stroking of your tight hole. Your drool puddled down the corners of your mouth as Val fucked your mouth. You couldn’t decide what was the best. All of it felt so damn good.

Your dripping pussy clenched around Vox’s cock as he used his gift to cause a deep vibration to roll through you. Two of Velvette’s fingers filled your tight hole, making you moan around Val’s cock even as your jaw ached. It didn’t take much longer for you to orgasm, feeling overstimulated from earlier. Bands snapped in your lower belly as you crashed over the edge, shuddering around Vox’s vibrating cock and Vel’s fingers. Your jaw went slack around Val’s cock as you rode out the wave until you were finally spent, allowing the serene blue waves to claim you. Oh, it hurt so good.

Your limbs turned to jelly as you were freed from all their appendages. Your knees scooted toward your chest before you curled into a fetal position. Your tail swished over your thighs as Valentino gave you a gentle pat between your black curved horns. Your fluffy ears smoothed back happily. Velvette may have been tiny in stature, but she made up for it in strength as she pried your limbs apart to wipe you clean with a warm towel. A happy yip escaped your maw as Vox began to brush your fur, making it gleam like silk. The three of them certainly knew how to take care of you. Suddenly, you didn’t care about the hot bath anymore.

As the three gathered around the table to enjoy an extravagant dinner from Voracious Eats, you curled in Valentino’s large lap as he fed you bites from his plate. You eagerly lapped up the delicious sauces and meats, savoring each delicious bite before letting out a soft yawn. The warmth of the food soothed your aching throat from swallowing down Val’s cum earlier.

“Our foxy girl needs some rest,” Vox chuckled before taking a long swig of his scotch. His fingers delicately scritched behind one of your ears.

“She worked hard today,” Valentino mused, scratching under your chin.

“It’s hard not to be taken under our little vixen’s spell,” Velvette cooed, reaching out her tiny hand to pat your haunches.

Valentino carried you over to the large bed. You pawed at the silky sheets before turning around in circles then collapsed against the little nest you created. Your eyes drooped close as you snuggled your face between your paws. Halfway through the night, you crawled on Vox’s chest, enjoying the soft thrum of his metallic body as his claws soothingly tangled in your fur. You moved over to Valentino next, making yourself a small ball on his chest, rising with each deep breath he took. That position served well for a bit until you needed something a little different.

You moved over to Velvette, gently nudging her away with your muzzle. Her hands stroked your face, making you wag your tail then curl into a makeshift donut shape. Velvette made herself comfy right in the center of your legs, her face snuggling against your soft, indigo fur. Eventually, Val and Vox snuggled up close on either side of you. With all three curled close, you stayed pleasantly asleep for the rest of the evening.

[radioisntdead]

Hello hello for the third time!!

Once again, your fics absolutely BLOW my mind away!! And I'm here to request just a silly fic with Angel Dust (platonic) and a feral!child reader, who always gets into trouble with his workplace and the hotel?

(I mostly just wanna read Valentino be shit on lmao)

Yours Truly,

- XIN 💠

(P.S, I RLLY WANNA BECOKE UR FRIEND OMG)

Good evening my dear! You requested this at the perfect time because I had to stop the feral child I am related to from running over the elderly with a grocery cart so that's definitely going to play into this not the hitting the elderly with a cart but the general vibe, ALSO THATS SO SWEET OF YOU TO SAY, I'M OPEN TO FRIENDSHIP JUST MESSAGE ME ON HERE BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW IF I MESSAGE YOU FIRST IT'LL BE FROM THIS BLOG OR MY MAIN ONE (I've been on Tumblr for like 5-6 years now and I still don't know how it works) YOU WILL GET ME YAPPIN' ABOUT HAZBIN, SENDING RANDOM SNIPPETS OF MY WRITING WITHOUT ANY CONTEXT AND MILDLY ODD EDITS OF SOUP

@fuck-this-shit-xin

Favorite babysitter

(Or alternatively Valentino gets beat by a child)

Angel dust & child reader, platonic!!!

Warnings:

I got carried away, Valentino loses a wing and both Antennas, nothing graphic surprisingly no unholy jokes mainly because the reader is a child, this is a shorter one, mild OOC

Angel dust didn't mind children, he preferred not to be around them because well, he wasn't the most child-friendly person to be around

However it was just his luck that the hazbin hotel's resident feral child had decided he was their favorite babysitter.

You had shown up one day at the doorstep of the hotel with a note taped onto you just saying 'Good luck '

It was suspected you were some type of bomb at first but that quickly was pushed aside when it was found you were just feral, you weren't a bad kid you just didn't listen, climbed onto the walls, tabletops, bit into things you weren't supposed too but you could be a very sweet kid, playing with the Egg Bois, helping Charlie by drawing, helping Husk dry the glasses or hunting down roaches with Niffty,

That last activity had been banned since you almost stabbed one of the Egg Bois.

You were a very sneaky and little clingy thing that was evident with you latching onto his legs at random times, sometimes he wouldn't even notice you until it was pointed out or he looked down and bam! There you were wrapped around him like a baby possum sippin' on a juice box.

He made it a point to make sure someone was distracting you as he escaped the hotel to go to work, unfortunately for him Sir Pentious who was meant to be watching you was distracted by his egg minions almost smashing themselves while trying to recreate action movies and you ran after him following him through the city and into the Vee's tower, shockingly due to plot convenience you weren't noticed until Valentino was yelling at Angel dust for who knows what before any work could be done, he pulled out Angel's contract for whatever reason, maybe to make a point? You didn't really know but you didn't like that what looked like a giant dressed up purple grape was yelling at your favorite babysitter so with your little legs you stomped up to Valentino tugging on his wings that acted as a robe, he looked down in fury that quick turned into angry confusion

"Who the fuck brought their child to set?!"

Valentino shouted looking around as his employees looked around shaking their heads, a rush of pure panic rushed through Angel dust, when did you get here? He didn't even notice you? Wasn't Sir Pentious watching you?!

Before he could even get a word out you stomped your leg and pointed at him, eyes full of pure fury.

"Say sorry!"

"¿Qué? What did you just say?"

"Say sorry!"

Valentino leaned uncomfortably in, opening his mouth to say something but Angel had grabbed you in his many arms fully intending to take whatever hit Valentino could throw at you, however you had a different plan, with a large frown on your face you wiggled your way out of Angels arms and pounced onto Valentino, your little clawed hands tearing into his wings, leaving small puncture wounds behind as you climbed up him, the contract that bounded Angel dust's soul to Valentino floated down to the ground.

Valentino yelled out words you couldn't quite understand as his wings flared out, you took the opportunity to steal his hat and bite into it tearing it apart before throwing the remaining fabric onto the ground.

The unholy studio's employees could only watch stunned as you grabbed onto his antennas completely ripping them off, if he couldn't fly because of his damaged one before, he definitely had no hope of it now.

Valentino dropped to the ground screeching, arms reaching up to throw you off only for you to start crawling around his back like a little bug leaving more scratches and wounds

Angel dust once he recovered from the shock of you absolutely tearing apart Valentino tried to grab you fully intending on taking you and booking it to the hotel where you'd be safe,

Unfortunately you were freakishly strong and in angel's attempts of trying to pull you off ended up pulling one of Valentino's wings out.

"Are you going to say sorry now?"

Valentino let out a groan of disoriented pain,

That didn't sound like an 'I'm sorry' to you, so you climbed up his remaining wing and ripped a large chunk of his fluff from it, Niffty would be proud!

"¡Lo siento! ¡Lo siento, solo vete!" the still disoriented Valentino shouted from the ground,

You smiled as you stood up from the overlord and skipped towards Angel dust, your eyes caught the contract that had floated to the ground, now you didn't know what it contained because you couldn't read but you assumed it probably meant something to the purple guy and so you decided that you should rip it.

"[Name] get over here' I gotta get you outta here before-" Angel dust started as you swiped the contact off the floor and ripped it to shreds, the smoke-like chain briefly appeared around Angel dust's neck before breaking apart and whooshing away.

Angel was stunned for a moment before a large grin broke out on his face, before anyone could say anything he picked you up, raised a certain finger up and shouted that he was quitting, after all Valentino didn't have his soul anymore, and frankly the work environment would be awkward now to say the least since a child had just inflicted permeant damage to his now former boss, he could find another job.

Unfortunately someone who didn't have good morals called the security team and now Angel dust was running down the Vee's tower holding you, he would pull out the guns that he kept in I assume his ribcage or something but you were right there and the gunshots would hurt your little eardrums, eventually the two of you outran them and returned into the safety of the hotel.

Angel dust sat you down on the ground as he breathed in, catching his breath while Sir Pentious rushed to you lifting you up while asking where you were before looking at Angel in confusion.

"Aren't you ssssssupposed to be at work?"

"I quit! Lil' chronic juice-o-holic over there ripped up my contract and fucked up Valentino! hAh!" Angel said still trying to catch his breath as you slipped out of Sir Pentious's hold and ran to go bug Husk for a juice box.

The news of you ripping Valentino's antennas and a wing out made hotel news, you were lightly scolded by Charlie about taking the violent route but she gave you ice cream and bought you a toy as a reward, Alastor saw great potential in you, Husk patted your head saying that you did good, Vaggie would eventually decide to teach you how to fight, you got being feral down but it couldn't help to teach you to be more calculated, Niffty was happy when you gave her the big clump of fluff for her collection, she already had some from her earlier interaction with the now antenna-less moth but more couldn't hurt!

And Angel dust, well he owed ya big time although he did scold you for following him into a dangerous place [thank goodness you didn't see anythin' unholy or Vaggie would've had his head!]

He spent a little more time with you the following week before he decided to do some job huntin', he would sneak you some candy or a extra juicebox when he could, and the two of you would watch kid friendly Disney or dreamworks movies on the hotel's TV.

Valentino laid down in his hospital room, full of fury that he got injured by a child of all things, a small child that had some type of connection with Angel dust who's soul he no longer owned, he swore that he would get payback against the child, unfortunately for him the mere presence of that child would strike enough fear into him that he wouldn't be able to make a move, and even if he could he wouldn't be able to do anything to the feral child.

He got off easy this time, he wouldn't be as lucky the next he messed with your favorite babysitter again.

Good evening folks! Hope you enjoyed! I'm working on getting the older requests in my inbox done and getting them out next week along with the 100 followers fic with Angel dust! So tune on in for that! Goodnight folks!

[hazbinhappy]

If you’d like, what about Vox x a reader who’s very wary of men and it took Vox a long time to gain their trust because of this. - @am-i-interrupting

A/N: felt this in my damn core

You drop into hell and I won’t lie I think hell’s gender population is definitely more men ✋😐🤚

Anywho! You drop for whatever reason probably a dumb one because the Divine Judge was feeling silly and nitpicky

You work for Velvette in this case!

It’s not like you work for her because she’s nice, no it’s for the pay and there is wayyyyyy less men than anywhere else in Hell and that’s a win

One day she mentions that they’re doing a “Vee’s Specialty line” and that she needs you to help design the outfits

you were originally wary of this and when it came to designs you simply just emailed them solely to Velvette, but she texted explicitly "These are shit!! Vox is on his way to "consult" be here ASAP don't want him here longer than he needs to be"

you kept your distance, but quickly took the clothes he gave for inspiration

you vaguely heard Vox speak to Velvette about your weird behavior, but she was half listening

Vox checked in occasionally about how the designs were coming along because he's a damn control freak

you barely responded, often in short words or sentences

actually requesting that he emailed you instead (which he actively ignored and kept coming in person)

if you've played animal crossing new horizons think of Sable! you have to keep talking to her daily for her to open up

now i'm not saying that works here obviously (if it was me i'd be pissed off)

but occasionally he'll get a full response from you

you find it odd how interested he is in the clothes that are based of his likeness (Valentino just gave his designs the okay and left it at that)

soon enough you come to feel weird when he doesn't visit you at his regular time and feel sad and like something is missing

once the clothes are finally out to the public he has no reason to visit you until Velvette excitedly (while still being mean) that Vox is finally upgrading his wardrobe like the old man he is and that you're in charge of it

....yay more work

jk you're not ecstatic about the work in the slightest, but it means your routine is back to normal

he's probably the guy who is allowed within a normal vicinity of you that actually can get a full conversation

i wouldn't say y'all eventually date, but you guys definitely become borderline friends/acquaintances!

probably would take an eternity to date each other

but guess what! y'all have that

[whiskersz]

Hihi I got a one shot request!! Vox x Reader where reader takes charge of date night! I feel like everyone headcanons, rightfully so btw, that Vox is 100% a fancy expensive restaurant for every date kind of guy. Maybe Reader takes care of date night for a change, opting for something more simple and comfortable over expensive clothing and expensive food. Fluff!!! I love the fluff (*≧∀≦*)

Hello there! Writing this was so fun, I might've not made it fluffy enough so feel free to tell me to change stuff or request something similar next time. Tried to make Reader as GN as possible too!

Have a nice time reading ^_^

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Vox x Reader - CEO of a Good Time

The moon shined brightly outside of the V Tower, its rays illuminating the rooms of the headquarters a bright red; you stared at your own reflection in the mirror of your room, the color of the pretty yet conservative outfit you were wearing contrasting against the red coming from the large window behind you.

A quick glance at your phone informed you that it was almost time to head out, so you grabbed your belongings and made your way towards the door. Opening it revealed the tall figure of your boyfriend, dressed in a dark blue striped suit with a touch of red from the tie neatly tucked into his blazer. You had told him to dress comfortable, and well, if this was his definition of that you couldn’t judge him, really.

A relaxed smile on his TV screen, he lowered the hand that was hanging in mid-air, ready to knock on your door;

“Oh, ready at the same time.” He pointed out, “I assume it’s time to get on our limousine then?”

You chuckled, linking your arm with his and walking towards the elevator.

“No silly, we’re driving there. It’s not that far anyways.”           

From the corner of your eye you could see Vox blink, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion. Still, for you he was willing to show his more gentlemanly side.

“Ah, I see...then let me drive.”

Once in the elevator you pressed the button supposed to lead you to the ground floor, opting to not say goodbye to the other Vee’s; Velvette was probably busy anyways, and Valentino...well, your dislike of him was apparent to everyone in the tower. Plus this was supposed to be a night for you and Vox alone, and a very special one at that since your boyfriend had allowed you to choose everything about it: the location, how to get there and what to do afterwards.

You set Vox’s arm free once you two reached the garages, letting him retrieve his black Pontiac Chieftain; he took the time to walk over to your side of the car and open your door, and once you were both inside he entrusted you his phone.

“Set the location to where you want us to go, hot stuff.”

“Gladly, princess.”

Vox glitched, choking on his own saliva.

“Told you not to call me that...”

“Yeah, in public!” you let out a chuckle, fiddling around with his phone.

Once the location was successfully set you placed it in your lap, as this car wasn’t equipped with a phone holder. Vox groaned as you blew him a kiss, and started driving and following the directions of the GPS.

---

The pizzeria you had chosen was humble, certainly not a place that Vox would’ve chosen had he been in charge that night. It was located in a cute little alleyway – well, as cute as those can be in Hell – so Vox struggled for a bit before he could find a parking space. When he did though, he once again made the effort to open your car door, earning a little kiss from you.

“I’ll trust that you’ve already been here and tasted the food, at least?” he questioned as you began walking towards your destination.

“Oh, don’t be so distrustful. My friends speak very well of this place!”

Saying the entrance was surrounded by LED lights would be an understatement; arrows pointing at the door and pizza-shaped lights almost blinded you, reflecting the light off of your boyfriend’s screen.

Once inside though, the pleasant smell of pizza immediately reached your nostrils and you were met with a quiet buzz typical of small taverns like this one. As your eyes adjusted to the dim orange lights, the owner themselves welcomed you.

“Greetings, greetings! We’re very pleased to serve a couple as grandiose as you!” She bowed, recognizing you and Vox. She then referred to you; “A table for two, like you said?”

“Yes please, and thank you!” you replied politely, letting her lead you to a square little table near the fireplace like you had asked earlier on the phone. Vox hesitantly followed the two of you, his gaze falling on the Imps sat at the other tables staring curiously, probably surprised that a couple such as you and your boyfriend would choose a place like this for a night out.

You sat down in front of each other as the owner of the pizzeria promised that a waiter would’ve been at your service in just a few minutes, and handed you two menus to choose your pizzas from.

“What are you going for?” you asked absentmindedly, scanning through the options.

“Well, I’d rather play it safe and get a Margherita, since we’ve never been here and all.”

You both ended up choosing your own pizza and letting it know to the waiter as they brought you breadsticks as an appetizer.

You stared at the flames flickering, the relaxing atmosphere of the pizzeria and the warm temperature embracing you like a fuzzy blanket. You think you would’ve fallen asleep if Vox hadn’t tapped his finger on the wooden table.

“Don’t sleep, the pizzas will be here soon.” He reminded you almost gently.

“I’m not sleeping, just resting. Isn’t this a nice change from the usual busy rich people restaurant?” you quickly realized what you said, stumbling on your own words as your boyfriend raised an inquisitive eyebrow, “Not that I don’t appreciate it when you organize dates, it’s all very sweet...but this is cute, no?”

Vox scanned your face, your gentle smile and soft cheeks illuminated by the fireplace’s light almost making him short circuit. He cleared his throat and awkwardly adjusted his tie when he realized that he had been staring for a bit too long without offering you a reply;

“Ah, yes, it’s not...as bad as I thought it would be, how did you find this place again? Your friends?”

You explained that, while you were usually busy working at the V Tower, your friends had a little more time on their hands, so from time to time they’d organize little hang outs with each other in places they didn’t know. Vox focused on the first part of your sentence: you didn’t have much time to hang out with your friends. He’d make sure that this changed once back at the tower, or at least he was going to let you choose where to go a little more often than usual.

He listened as you complimented the ambience of the place, and took a moment to admire it himself, ignoring the curious gazes of the other demons sat around you. Maybe it was a nice change, especially seeing you this happy, yeah.

The pizzas arrived soon, the waiter placing a candle at the centre of your table.

“Romantic!” you commented, “Vox, take a picture!”

Vox did as you told him to, ignoring the notifications on his phone and concentrating on shooting the perfect picture of you, even telling you to strike different poses. When he did so you raised your eyebrows, your mouth slightly agape.

“What? Got something on my screen?” he asked, switching to front camera to check for stains.

“No, it’s just...you usually say you need to check your notifications and all first, so I was a little surprised is all.”

He stopped admiring himself and refocused his attention on you;

“...Oh. Well, can’t really be an asshole all the time I guess,” he smirked, taking a surprise picture of you. You barely restrained yourself from yelling at him for that – jokingly, of course – and instead opted for stealing his phone and deleting it immediately as he laughed.

The pizzas were delicious, both you and Vox practically devoured them and even offered the other a slice of each other’s pizza. He also decided not to order alcohol as he was supposed to drive you both back, and drinking is never a good idea in these cases.

He led you back to his car, an arm draped across the small of your back protectively as you passed various groups of ill-intentioned individuals; it was late at night when you left the pizzeria, after all.

This time you ran forward a little, opening the car door on the passenger’s side for him.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake-“

“After you, sweetheart.” You teased, a smug smile plastered on your face. He rolled his eyes, taking you by the hand and letting you sit instead. “Aw, boring. I thought I was the one in charge tonight.”

“Maybe next time I’ll consider your strange proposals.” He said, walking to the other side of the car. Before he could start it you placed your hand on his, making him turn towards you.

“Thanks for...indulging in this. Next time the lead’s all yours.” You said sincerely. He smirked at you, pulling you in for a quick kiss.

“Nah, I can handle a little change.”

[gabrielsbubblegumbitch]

PLZ MORE SILLY VEES HEADCANONS THE LAST ONES MADE MY DAYYYYY

Okay okay I'll try to squeeze a little bit more silly of me, just for you, Anon <333 Because I love making people happy uwu

Velvette and Valentino sometimes end up doing lines of coke off Vox's screen when they're out of flat surfaces. It usually goes something like this:

Vox, look, what's that on the ceiling?! Okay, wait, now don't move... OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE! Chill, it's not like you don't use my body for your pleasure. Yeah, God gave you this flat face for a reason. We all have our purpose

Valentino is kinda like that friend who went to therapy once and only remembered the part where his feelings and boundaries are super important.

Stop being mean to me! I'm not being mean, I just told you not to kill that waiter. I have FEELINGS. *sigh* We know, Val. AND YOU ARE MAKING THEM S A D. We know, Val.

Valentino once came up with the idea that Vox's pornstar name should be voXXXy. He keeps bringing it up every once in a while, still hoping Vox will agree to have a cameo in one of his movies.

Vox once surprised Valentino with this cheeky red lingerie set. When Val caught on it was basically a Sexy Alastor Costume, Vox ended up couch-surfing for a week.

Whenever Vox doesn't pay enough attention to him, Valentino messes with his Excel sheets, inserting random '69' or '420' here and there, or pasting some of his sexy photos in Vox's Very Important PowerPoint About KPIs.

When Velvette is bored, she comes up with the dumbest ways to die and then asks her succubi friends (since succubi are some of the demons legally allowed to travel to the mortal realm) to start them on TikTok. She's incredibly proud whenever she learns that some soul ended up in hell because of her challenges.

This one time, stumbling home after a party, Vox was like:

Val, Vel, you guys can draw, right? How 'bout I pay you hundred bucks for a big-ass graffiti? What graffiti BIG! Saying what? FUCK ALASTOR AHAHAHAHAHA *hick*

They were cackling like evil children while painting it. It is still there somewhere in Pentagram City, absolutely beautiful.

Vox likes to come up with silly names for his products that are almost cartoonishly evil, because he's a silly evil guy. So, he will market those Cereal Killers to the kids in hell.

[freakyfrye]

ᝰ. coworkers. friends? lovers ♡

requested: vox x fem! reader, what if the reader got shot during the extermination and vox found them (but I tweaked it), injured prompt: “Steady, steady. That’s it. Just hold on to me. Good girl.”

type: headcanon/scenario

content: friends w/ benefits or situationship (up to interpretation, could go either way), soft/protective vox, blood, wound treating, vulnerable vox

note: this is not edited or proof read, so typos expected

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི Heaven has the biggest balls to shorten a once a year of getting fucking hacked down into two giant fucks yous. Screw hell, right?

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི Everyone had six months to prepare for this shit show of an excuse to massacre sinners, orchestrated by literal serial killer angels because let’s call them what they are sera, please. But you, of course, are running a little behind to get outta dodge.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི Just because a large percentage of its habitants were literally dying by angels does not mean business just stops. Power doesn’t stop for no one, not even this.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི If you don't show up and do your job, you’ll never hear the end of it—especially not from Vox. Given he was your boss, that was what he was entitled to do. But that didn’t make it any better knowing that he gets to sit with the vees in one of their fancy penthouses while this all goes down and you're stuck finishing up some quotas.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི Even as you complete your duties, Vox is texting you nonstop. It’s a little all over the place for someone like him: calling you good girl for your job well done, telling you to get to cover real soon, that you better not stop texting him, text him back when you get somewhere safe, yada yada yada.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི Serves you right for fucking him one time…six times. Alright, you lost count. It was a complete accident—the first time. You were having a really stressful day. The day was starting to blur together after hearing some bad news. Before you knew it, your sucking faces with your boss after something he said made you frustrated, but in the best way. Now he thinks he’s entitled to your time even outside of work.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི After that, you’ve kinda been doing it whenever stress overwhelmed you, which was often. Sometimes you’re convinced in thinking Vox piles a crap load of work onto you just to have you ride him silly during your break in his office.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི You scoff at his behavior with an eye roll, darting into an alleyway, a shortcut to your hiding space before shooting him a curt text back. Mainly outta respect for yourself and your sanity, you try to keep it as close to professional as possible but it was hard when he pulls dumb crap like this.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི Pausing briefly in the shadows, you spot an angel causing havoc in the area before flying away. You quickly slip across the street, through the main entrance of the building and up to one apartment you call your own. Only when you lock all possible locks and shut your blinds, do you feel relaxed enough to lean back against the kitchen window seat to text Vox, letting him know you're safe.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི Never did you expect to find your window to shatter seconds later, an angel spear stabbed into your thigh. The pain was instantaneous, you want to cry out but you slam your hand over your mouth to muffle your screams as your eyes darts out the window, petrified to see that angel from earlier fighting someone right outside.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི You drop to the floor, losing your phone in the process as you crawl yourself away from the window, whimpering pathetically to the bathroom to lock yourself inside and hide there until the extermination ends. There was so much blood already lost, you could feel yourself grow weaker as you lean against the tube. Sleep consumed you a few minutes in.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི While unconscious, your phone was pinging back to back, texts from a very unhappy Vox. He told you to not stop texting him. To text him when you’re safe—he knows damn sure he did, for fuck, he was staring right at his words but for whatever fucking reason you didn’t listen. Why were you like this?

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི He couldn’t even pay attention to Alastor getting his ass handed to him, a historical moment, for his eyes were glued to his phone, waiting for those three dots to appear. When it didn’t show, he left the area for the security room, ignoring the Vees' questions.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི Vox zaps his phone to a bigger screen, patience wearing thin when you still haven’t replied back during his short walk over. It was strumming the line of worry, something he hasn’t felt since he was alive, and it makes him sick. His stomach turns further when he can’t find you on any of the many cameras he has through the city.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི You're forcing his hand as he opens a spyware app. He normally doesn’t have to do this, never had a reason until now. But you weren’t responding, and never had he known you not to respond to him. May it be one worded or a full rant reply, you always did.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི Your location says home. That’s a little relief shaved off the top of his worries. You're safe; the part of town you live barely gets touched during any extermination. But there was always a chance, giving him enough cause to zap himself into your living room via tv.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི Thank God he did show up when he did. He could see the shattered window inside your kitchen from his position, phone abandoned on the floor. Eyes noticing a trail of blood leading off into a direction. He follows it to the bathroom, where he bangs rapidly, calling out your name. Like the text messages, he receives no response.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི He knocks the hinges off your flimsy door with one shoulder slam, eyes widen in shock at seeing you there unconscious, spar still in your thigh. Cursing, he reaches down and checks your pulse, exhaling sharply when there is one and slaps your face to wake you up.

“Hey… wake up… open your eyes for me.” Vox slaps a little harder after the light taps weren’t working, pleased to see your (color) eyes peel open to lock with his, “Yeah. Keep them open for me, sweetheart.”

He shifts his weight to glance down at your thigh, contemplating his next move. He wasn’t a fucking doctor, he didn’t know how to tend to injuries this size—especially one from an angel—but it was either help you or let you bleed out and he couldn’t bring himself to do the latter. Not when he went out of his way to check on you. It’ll be a waste of his time.

He leans down further, grabbing your arm to wrap around his shoulders, “Steady, Steady.” he whispers, reaching under your legs to pick you up, another arm supporting your lower back. He nods when you fist his shirt, “That’s it. Just hold on to me.” he murmurs against your head when it rolls heavily to rest on his chest, “Good girl.”

Hoisting you both up so he’s standing at full height, he maneuvers his way around your place with trial and error until he finds your bedroom. Placing you gently on the bed, he rushes back to the bathroom, yanking open drawers and cabinets until he finds an unused first aid kit. He peels it open as he returns back to your room, swiping the half empty bottle of alcohol on your kitchen table on the way.

Your eyes practically pop out your head when he grabs the spear, Vox looking at with a gentle expectant expression, “Might wanna bite on to something?” is all he says before slowly pulling the spar out.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི The pain was worse than when it got forced in your thigh that you were shaking your head with pleas for him to stop, lip quivering as you held his wrist tightly. It hurt so much you weren’t thinking straight, couldn’t wrap your head around why he was doing this.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི You were pissing him off, with your stupid tears and pleading for him to stop and then actually grabbing onto him to stop him. Can’t you see he was trying to help you? That he cares enough to want to make you feel better? That it will get better if you just stop all your wailing.

ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀི With a growl he slams his mouth into yours, eating up all the screams you release once he yanks out the spar in one pull. He moves his mouth against yours, only to distract you, only until your screams turn to whimpers. Then he’s pulling away, undoing his belt to wrap it around your thigh to stop the bleeding.

The alcohol doesn’t hurt as much when he pours it over your wound. By then you are already all cried out, reduced to sniffling as he wraps you in gauze and bandages. “I need a hospital..” you mutter, voice hoarse from the screaming. “I don’t want to die again.”

“Fuck. Fuck.” Vox curses, finishing his wrapping before moving to lie beside you, wrapping a protective arm around you, face serious as he says, “You don’t get one. Not right now, not until the extermination is over. I’m all you got. Okay?” his gaze softens a large degree at the worried expression on your face. He reaches up, guiding you to look at him by your chin, “Hey… you got me… I won’t let you die.” he says, pecking you on your lips as if to seal the deal.

rules, masterlist

[averytirednerd]

Oh yeah, time for a big rant about Hazbin Hotel!!!

I haven’t really had much of a chance to sit down and write about this since I watched the episodes, so things I say are probably going to reflect what others have said. I’m just writing this to gush about the things I love about some particular songs in HH. 

I didn’t have any big expectations going into the first episode, because I’d mostly heard negative reviews of the show so far. I had heard that the songs, however, were bright spots, so I really looked out for the songs and listened in every time we were graced with one. The characters are truly the best versions of themselves whenever there’s a song going on, even if they aren’t the main focus of the song. It’s amazing to see, especially since my favorite thing about this show is the characters themselves.

My favorites are “Loser, Baby” & “Stayed Gone” and will probably be the main focus of this post because <3333

“Stayed Gone” is sung by Christian Borle (Vox) and Amir Talai (Alastor) and I could not be happier about it. Their voices are amazing here, and my favorite bits of this song are on repeat in my head.

I also love little visuals like the mug Vox has in the talk show format, the scrolling text in the news show format, or Vox’s error message toward the end of their bantering. 

(The scrolling text says: “I’m totally not worried about this guy and neither should you be. I totally wrecked his sh*t last time he tried me.”)

Alastor really gets under Vox’s skin and it makes me kick my feet every time. Their dynamic truly is everything, and I’m so excited we got this song that showcases it perfectly. 

He clearly enjoys it too, what a little jerk.

Speaking of these two, Vox definitely had/has a thing for Al at some point, right? I mean…inviting him to the Vees for a start. Not to mention just the v i b e s. Poor guy though, it’s definitely one-sided.

I love Al’s use of…modern…lingo. Truly a spectacle. That on top of it being a reveal of Al’s rejection to Vox’s offer 💀 I love this man <333

Last thing about this song, promise, but also I love the casual little lore drops and more pieces to the puzzle of the past that we get. Very exciting! Can’t wait to see how everything fits together once we find more pieces.

Okay okay, moving on. “Loser, Baby” is amazing musically as well as visually. 

First things first, I LOVE JAZZ OMG AND IT FITS HUSK’S VIBE AND EVERYTHING SO PERFECTLY???

Keith David’s voice definitely fits Husk in my eyes now, I see it, it works. He’s amazing. Does a fantastic job.

Not to mention Blake Roman’s performance was, of course, incredible as well. 

The big, upbeat, brassy sound in this song is amazing and I’m loving the trumpet in it especially (any fellow trumpet players? no?)

I love everything about this song. The visuals, voices, instrumentals, lyrics, message, all of it!

Husk slowly going from “yeah you kinda suck lmao, but so do I” in order to not make Angel feel like he’s not being genuine, to sneaking in a better message of “we’re not perfect but it’s okay, don’t be so hard on yourself” (and getting Angel to believe/go along with it too!!) is amazing. It’s a perfect example of these characters being the best versions of themselves during musical numbers. 

This song is what solidified Husk as number 2 in my rankings (and I’m sure I’m not the only one). I mean…just look at the way he moves, it’s so silly.

(We’re going to ignore the Videoshop watermarks, okay?)

Overall, I’m loving this show so far despite some obvious issues with pacing n such and an overall rocky start. Especially loving the songs, which I think kinda make the show rn. 

If anyone wants to add anything (because I definitely didn’t cover a whole lot, just surface level stuff because even this took a while to type out) then please feel free to! Also ask me any questions you’ve got for me concerning stuff that has/will happen(ed) in Hazbin Hotel. I love HH discourse!

Thanks to those of you who read all the way through, sorry for such a long post lol <3