#me and two of my besties stayed in a cabin

[sabr33zy]

birthday dinner :)

and dessert! 🍒🎂✨

[supercutszns]

twin beads | luke castellan

wc + pairing: 6.7k, luke x daughter of poseidon! reader

synopsis: you’ve been unclaimed for five years. you’ve loved your best friend even longer. the sea used to be your greatest solace, but after percy jackson comes to camp, it’s your cruelest reminder. (based on this ask!)

warnings: best friends to lovers <3, percy/reader sibling dynamic, fluff and angst then fluff again, hurt/comfort, shameless making out. sorry this one is so long but besties to lovers is my lifeblood!!! i get so attached!! designated song is true blue by boygenius:)

i. you said you wanted to feel alive, so we went to the beach

“Ahoy, sailor!”

The familiar voice ricochets across the lake. You turn, leaving glimmers of sun behind you as you stare back at the docks of Camp Half-Blood. An orange blob with a curly mop of hair is beckoning you. You laugh, wave back at him, and plunge into the water. It cools your face after staying above the surface for so long—you just love watching the light reflected off the waves. But the second you’re under the water, the soreness in your muscles, the heat on your face, the exhaustion from treading for so long, are washed away from you. You swim with precision and vigor, relishing the feel of the river cupping your limbs to spur you forward. Not to sound lame, but you fucking love swimming. 

But maybe not as much as you love your best friend. 

He laughs when your head pops out of the water at the edge of the dock. “Wow, that took you longer than usual,” he teases, brown eyes glinting in the dawn. “You getting sloppy?”

You huff, splashing some water up at him but it barely touches him. “I’m tired, you moron. I’ve been out there for an hour.”

Luke leans down at the edge of the dock, offering you a hand. His face is bemused when you latch onto him, and with a good flex of his bicep he pulls you up. “All right, c’mon,” he grunts.

All your energy evaporates the second your body’s out of the water. You’re far too lazy to be graceful, so you sprawl out onto the dock like a dying fish, letting the sun kiss every inch of you. “Eww,” Luke giggles overtop you, prodding your side with the tip of his shoe. “Get up, you mermaid.” 

“Make me, you mailman.”

Your arm drapes over your eyes, and you sigh. There really is nothing better than these moments; droplets of water soaking into your skin after an early morning swim, your best friend right beside you. 

He keeps nudging you with your shoe, over and over until your ribs start to hurt. You groan, swatting him away and stretching out your limbs with a groan, letting them pop and relax, until you blearily make your way to your feet. 

“You forgot your towel again,” Luke condones, but like always, he’s brought one for you. 

He goes through a practiced routine of drying you off, wrapping the towel around your shoulders and down your arms, across your back, scrunching the water out of your hair. It doesn’t matter how cold the water gets—this part always makes you warm. 

“Thanks,” you smile as he hands the towel off to you. “Anything interesting happen this morning, O Captain, my captain?”

“Not yet, sailor, sir,” he replies in a stuffy, gruff voice the two of you have joked around with since you were kids. “Just grabbing you for breakfast.”

You giggle, following him past the docks and to the shore. Once you’ve grabbed all your stuff, you both fall in stride and head towards your cabin, your twin five-beaded necklaces hanging over your shirts. 

Five years ago, when you got to Camp for the first time, you were as big a loser as any. You were bad at everything—everything—and had no real friends until you accidentally whacked some other friendless loser in the head with an oar when you were about to go canoeing. Luke got mad at you, but his little sister Annabeth was even more furious. He offered to be your partner for the day anyway. You’ve been partners ever since. 

Over the years the two of you have grown in status at the camp, more so Luke than you. He’s an excellent cabin leader and by far the greatest swordsman in camp. You, still unclaimed, have found solace in giving younger campers swimming lessons and wading out there on your own till you get sunstroke. (It’s happened a few times. Luke is never pleased, but also refuses to let the Apollo campers take care of you. He nurses you back to health with ice cream and horrible gossip.)

But every night you return to the Hermes cabin with a hollowness in your chest. One bunk emptied, then immediately filled. You’ve had the same one for five years, and the only condolence is that it’s right next to Luke’s, and sometimes you spend hours at night making faces at each other till your laughter endangers other people’s sleep. 

Yes, you love the water at Camp Half-Blood, but you love Luke most. 

Rumours of a new kid are rustling at camp. You haven’t seen him, but you’re just dying to get in on the gossip. Apparently he slayed a minotaur. Apparently Annabeth has seen him. And apparently he’s unclaimed. You hate to admit it, but this is the most exciting news you’ve heard in weeks!

Your afternoon is spent giving some swimming lessons and taking some Demeter campers canoeing. (Some of them freak out on the water. so it’s a nice challenge to untangle the sea plants they get hooked around their boat.) It feels like you’ve been here forever. A break is in desperate demand right now. 

You have no idea what kind of God heard your prayers, but your fellow counsellor has an unimpressed look on her face when she taps you on the shoulder and goes, “Your friend’s calling you.” 

The way she says it is almost degrading. You turn to look back at the shore to see the dark curly hair you’d spot a mile away. Next to him is a much shorter orange blob, shuffling awkwardly as Luke attempts to flag you down. Score!

You shoot an apologetic look at her. “Uh … I’ll be right back.” You wince, already disposing of your baggy orange shirt (it’s Luke’s) with your bathing suit underneath. 

“No you won’t,” she says dryly. “Just go.”

You flash a smile you hope is loaded with charm, and you’re off into water. As you swim, the only thing on your mind is I really really hope that’s the new kid, and I wonder what Luke’s face looks like right now. (He’s probably grinning, eyes crinkled at the sides as he tries to follow your figure beneath the waves. Maybe he’s doing that cute thing where his head tilts to the side as he watches.) 

When you’re close enough to the shore, you come out of the water, wringing your hair. “Hey, guys!” It’s Luke, Chris, and some blonde kid you’re sure is the new one. “What’s up?”

Luke is about to say something, then he frowns. “Where’s my shirt?”

“Left it in the canoe, I’ll go back for it later,” you reply, limply gesturing behind you. 

“And where’s your towel?”  

“Okay, I did bring one this time!” You counter. “I just gave it to a little Ares kid ‘cause she forgot hers.” 

Luke clicks his tongue, shakes his head at you, but of course he’s got one in his hands so what’s the worry? He’s endearingly amused when you take the cloth and dry yourself off, and the new boy, having watched this all raptly, widens his eyes and drawls, “Ohhhh, so you’re his gi—”

“This is Camp’s resident mermaid, Percy.” Chris butts in, adding your name almost as an afterthought. 

After you fasten your towel around you, you’re put off by Percy’s scrutinizing stare. “Look, it’s been a pretty weird day so I cannot tell if you’re joking or not.” 

“I’m not a mermaid,” you snipe, throwing Chris a dirty look. “People just call me that because I give swimming lessons here.” You stick your hand out to the blonde boy. “Nice to meet you, Percy.” 

He gives a polite nod, a little awkward. “Right back at ya.” The two of you study each other as you shake. He’s young, probably about twelve, a smatter of freckles across his face. His eyes look like the lake. Something itches in the back of your brain. There’s a moment where the shake is suspended, neither of you have let go but are no longer actively holding on, and you see it in his face that he’s studying you, too. Huh.

The conversation continues as normal, but you almost start to feel queasy for a second. “We’re trying to find something Percy’s good at,” Luke says with a pat on Percy’s shoulder. “You got any ideas?”

“Yes, please, because I really would like to have a word with my father,” Percy clips. “Is Glory, like, purely a skill thing or can I get some if I tie someone else’s shoes or something?” 

“I don’t have shoes,” you add unhelpfully. 

“It’s okay, dude,” Luke squeezes Percy’s shoulder. “Camp is great, no matter where you end up.”

Even if you’re like her, he means without saying. Even if you don’t end up anywhere. 

You meet Luke’s eyes. This is a kid that wants so badly to meet his father, to ease the ache inside him. You are the absolute worst person for this. One of the longest current unclaimed streaks and your ache remains. To Percy, you’re the biggest example of a failure there is, and Luke is only just now realizing it. 

“Maybe try the infirmary?” You pipe, shuffling back and forth on the sand. “You might have a knack for medicine.”

“Doubt it,” Percy swallows. “But yeah, okay. Who’s your parent, again?”

Percy can’t see it, but Luke and Chris send you a shifty look and all you can do is widen your eyes to be like, Help! Don’t make me crush his dreams! I don’t want another kid to hate me! 

You swallow. No matter how fast you think, you cannot come to a logical sentence. “I, uh—”

Just then, in another stroke of luck (wow, that’s two more than usual) an Athena counsellor that looks insanely disgruntled is running towards you. “Stolls put spiders in our cabin again,” he heaves once at a stop. “Please get rid of them.”

“Can’t you just squash ‘em?” Percy asks. 

“Not the spiders, the twins.” 

Chris is already nodding, but Luke looks to you first. He’s anxious, disappointed. You wish you could smooth out the creases in his brow with your thumb. “Don’t worry,” you stretch out a smile. “I’ll chill with Percy. It won’t take you guys too long.”

He’s still hesitant. You’re not sure this is a good call either. But he reaches out, quickly squeezes your shoulder and mutters, “Thank you.” Your skin feels gooey when he touches it. 

His signature roguish smile returns as he looks back to Percy. The side of his face is shadowed by the sun so well it makes you jealous. “Don’t give her a hard time, eh?” He reprimands playfully. 

Percy smiles a little. “I’ll try not to.”

You are once again reminded just how easy it is to love Luke. How effortlessly he moves into your heart. It happened to you after you slapped him with an oar. It’s already happening to Percy.

You’re sure he won’t like you nearly half as much. 

After Luke and Chris leave, Percy resigns to staring out at the campers canoeing on the lake. Maybe now is a good time to admit you’re not good with kids. Luke has tried many times to make you his welcome partner, but you can’t take to the role nearly as well. You’re perpetually antsy. And sweaty. 

“So, what cabin are you a part of that lets you do this all day?” Percy asks, squinting against the sun. 

Your heart gets heavy. With a sigh, you sit yourself down, and Percy soon follows. “Hermes, actually,” you say as casually as you can. 

Percy goes pale as a sheet. “Uh, what?”

“I’m unclaimed,” you clarify. “I don’t … I don’t have a parent.”

There’s always a pitiful pause whenever a camper figures that out. This one is somehow … clunkier. “Oh,” Percy says. “Oh. Okay, that makes sense. For a second I thought—phew.” Then his eyes trail down to the thread hooked around your fingers, the five beads you run your thumb over. “How long have you been here?”

“Five long, blissful years,” you hum dryly. 

Water ripples over pebbles on the shore. Every new camper’s ambition is eroded by the truth you represent. Percy’s no different. His brows furrow and his face falls. “And you’ve never been claimed?” He asks, and you can feel the noxious mix of pity, confusion and despair laced beneath it. 

You shake your head, watching some Demeter kids splashing each other’s canoes with their oars. “Nope. But it’s not so bad. I like my cabin, you know? I like my life. Doesn’t really matter who your parents are anyway, I think. You do the same activities as everyone else, just on different teams.”

“But doesn’t it make you mad?”

“It used to,” you shrug, “But not anymore. It’s just …” You sigh, rolling a bead against your thumb. “If I’m unclaimed, I’m unclaimed. That’s the way it is. You can’t force the Gods to do anything.” 

“That’s what Luke said,” Percy remarks, almost bitterly. 

“I’m a rare case though, Percy,” you half-lie to him, nudging him a bit with your shoulder. “You’ll get claimed. It’s your first day. And until then you’re kind of free to be whatever. You don’t have to fit into anything, which is kinda nice, and you can screw around as much as you want and nobody can really get mad at you ‘cause you’re new.” A smile rises on your face. “And I heard you killed a minotaur, so you’ve already got some cool points.”

His face screws up in a grimace, and it makes you laugh. “Oh joy, cool points. Can’t live without those.”

Okay, maybe you’re not bad with kids. Maybe you’re just bad with boring kids. Because this is going decent, right? 

“What if I don’t get claimed, though?” Percy asks after a moment, a vulnerable note eclipsing him. It resonates inside your chest. You pause for a moment, heaving a loaded breath. 

“Do you fart a lot in your sleep?”

His melancholy pauses. He looks at you like you’ve grown another head. “Uh … what? No? I think?”

“Then you can take the bunk above mine if you want. It’s empty now,” you say. “And if you’re never claimed you can come swimming with me, and we can find seashells to put under Luke’s pillow every night until he starts thinking they’ve always been there.”

Percy blinks. “Do you have any friends?”

“Yes, and I’m going to torture him until I die. Cabin eleven is oodles of fun, Percy, you’ll see!”

He looks a little horrified. “Luke said I was going to like you,” he mutters. “I … am not sure if he’s right.”

Oh, well. You’ll take it. 

ii. you can't help but become the sun

You can’t sleep, and Luke knows it. His eyes burn into the side of your face as you stare up at your bunk. You sneak him a look. He smiles ruefully. Sweeping his arm up from beneath his covers, a makeshift tent is formed next to him. He nods to you. Before you know it, you’ve abandoned your own bed, taking a single step until you skirt into the pocket of his mattress Luke has carved for you. He lets the sheets fall, cocooning you with him the way he always does. 

You’ve been sharing beds on occasion for years. One of you gets cold, has a nightmare, or wants to talk until your mind fades out, the only solution is a place next to each other. Whispers against cheeks, giggles muffled into pillows, necklaces knocking together. You used to be further apart. Now you can’t remember the last time Luke hasn’t latched onto you the second you’re within reach. It warms you a little more each time. 

When your head hits his pillow, the two of you just stare at each other for a moment, lips pursed in amusement. His face is so wildly nostalgic to you—five years seems like too short a time to have known him. His eyes are pitch-dark and soft with exhaustion, but you can still pick out the trademark Hermes mirth glimmering through. You sometimes forget his scar, probably because you know he wants you to forget it. He’d kill you for thinking this, but you kind of like the way it hugs the curve of his cheek, bunches up when his dimple appears. It makes you sad. It makes you happy. It makes you love him. 

“Percy likes you,” he whispers, opening himself up so your chin brushes his shoulder. “That’s a first.”

He’s only wearing a tank top to sleep, so his warmth seeps through his skin when you tap him on the chest. “Shut up!” You hiss back, tapering into a giggle. “Has he picked up on anything yet?”

Luke bites the inside of his cheek, regretfully shaking his head. “Nope. But all that skill stuff is kinda arbitrary anyways. He’s still hung up on kleos, though, so … that’ll come in handy for Capture the Flag.”

“Ah, yes. Using a child’s misguided need for fulfilment as a weapon. A camp classic.” 

“Well someone’s gotta be useful for Capture the Flag in this cabin and it sure as hell isn’t you, mermaid,” he barbs back. 

Your jaw drops in mock offense and you squeeze a hand around his shoulder to shake him. “I will put you in a headlock right now, Luke, I’ll break your arm—”

“Be quiet!” He giggles as you attempt to wrangle yourself on top of him. “I’ll be nice to you, I’ll be nice, stop!” You get absolutely nowhere before the bed creaks and Luke shoves you back down. Your pulse rattles through your mouth as you laugh silently. “You’re the worst,” he mutters in your ear, raising the hairs on your neck.

“Well Percy likes me, so,” you turn your nose to the sky like a haughty old lady. 

“Percy’s a funnier, less annoying version of you,” he pokes your side. “That’s how I knew you’d get along, you weirdo.”

The momentary adrenaline this conversation has brought you is mellowing. “Hey, I’m very—very funny,” you mumble through a yawn. 

Luke laughs quietly. “Sure you are.”

He pulls you back to him, arm slung around the dip of your waist. When you make no protest, he seals you against his shoulder again. It’s started to feel a little different, him holding you like this. There’s an uncertainty your body faces about how to respond. His thumb runs over your spine and you decide to relax into him, pressing your face into the crook of his neck. Your chin knocks against his collarbone and you have the urge to curl yourself against his chest, just to feel him breathe. 

“Get some sleep, sailor,” he murmurs, fingers brushing through the roots of your hair. You don’t think he realizes he’s doing it. Your cheeks warm, and you bury yourself even further into the space against his shoulder and his pillow. Gods, there’s something wrong with you, isn’t there?

“Will do, soldier.” The campy voice you do is half hearted at best as you find yourself absorbed in the closest thing to a full home you’ll ever get. In this sleepy hollow with bedsheets and a boy, there is acceptance. 

Well, mostly. You think you dream about Luke brushing a kiss along your hairline in your last bit of consciousness. You think you wish it was real. You think you want him to do it again.   

iii. when you don't know who you are, you fuck around and find out

The last time your cabin lost a game of Capture the Flag, you’d still been taller than Luke. That’s how long your winning streak has felt. There’s no reason you foresee that changing today. Even when Annabeth drags Percy along with her on whatever surely precarious quest to victory she’s created. It’s unlike her, to bring a newbie along. It’s concerning. 

“He’s fine,” Luke drawls to you when your face has been tense for twenty minutes. “Annabeth’s got a plan.” He’s a little winded after clearing out some Ares kids with Chris. You aren’t much use when it comes to weapons—your friends take the lead as you wait from a distance, ready for backup. Thank the Gods they didn’t need it this time. You’re content to just watch, but whenever Luke grins after getting another kid to surrender, veins in his arms raised like rivers on a map, you get a little distracted and you’re not sure why. 

You just huff back at him, totally normal when he wipes a sheen of sweat off his jaw. “Annabeth’s gonna use him as cannon fodder,” you mutter back, and Luke hits your arm with an appalled grin. 

Annabeth did, in fact, have a plan. So you won. Obviously. 

You’re still doubtful Percy wasn’t cannon fodder, though, with how beat up he looks on the shoreline when the rest of your team flocks to the stolen flag to claim victory. He’s slumped down on the rocky shore, a few equally beaten Ares kids straggling away from him. 

“So I was right, huh?” Luke hums in your ear, pulling your eyes to him. 

He’s revelling in newfound glory, and damn it, you get confused when you look at him when he’s like this. You’re not sure when it happened but you want to tear your heart out of its chest because of how sick it makes you. Some of his curls are stuck to his forehead with sweat, his hair suffering a serious case of helmet-head. But it’s the pride oozing off him, the infectious happiness laced through his smile, that makes you fond of him in a way you’re not sure you should be. He’s beloved for a reason—he looks almost prophetic after winning a match, and he knows it. A glaring difference between the gangly boy you met all those summers ago. If you weren’t his best friend, you’d probably be one of his many admirers, watching his teammates fawn over his talent and wishing you were beside him. 

But you are beside him. And you’re his friend. Not an admirer. So everything’s fine. 

“You wouldn’t be saying that if we lost,” you retort, knocking your chestplate against his. It’s meant to be a friendly nudge, but Luke leans into it until you swear you feel his heart beating through the metal. 

He’s grown into his smile, less boyish and more wry. “You know I never lose, sailor.” 

You want to reply, but his eyes are startlingly pretty in the sunlight. That’s normal. Whatever. A heat rises in the apples of your cheeks so you scoff lightly and turn away as soon as possible. You feel Luke’s gaze following as you turn attention elsewhere. Your sternum feels fluttery.

Percy catches your attention again. Gods, he looks beat. He’s talking to Annabeth as she helps him up, and you see the gnarly scrape marring his cheek. You should probably check on him, right? 

You’re halfway to the kids when Annabeth shoves Percy backwards into the water. Like, shoves. 

“Annabeth!” You’re scowling at her the same way she scowled at you when you first hit Luke with that oar, rushing over to help Percy. 

“What is wrong with you?” Percy sputters out lying in the lake, but you’re ankles-deep in the water before you know it. He’s glaring daggers at Annabeth, but she looks relatively unimpressed. What happened during this game? 

“Thanks,” Percy mutters as you help him up. 

You say something to shrug it off but you can’t remember what, because your eyes are drawn to the scrape on his cheek. You have to blink a few times to get it, but you’re pretty sure it’s dissolving. Vanishing off his skin. “What the hell?”

Everyone on the shore is watching him now, trying to memorize his injuries before they wash away. Percy’s staring down at himself like he’s just been body-swapped. “I don’t understand.” 

You’ve never seen anything like this before. The strangest feeling fuels you—your bones feel firmer somehow, like the blood inside your body has weight to it. Like something is happening. A fear pierces your gut. 

Annabeth’s eyes have raised, and so have Percy’s. Your mouth goes dry. Right above him is the symbol of a trident, radiating so blue it washes out the sky itself. 

The claiming symbol of Poseidon. 

“Your dad’s calling,” Annabeth says, a smile itching the corners of her mouth. 

Percy looks like he’s going to pass out. You probably do too. “Told you you’d get claimed,” you manage to squeeze the words through the knot in your chest. 

You’re smiling until Percy looks at you, then looks up. His face goes white as a sheet. Or, as white as it can bathed in a pale blue glow. “Uh…” He blinks slowly, and your stomach twists. “I think she was talking to you.”

When you look up and see an identical trident looming over your head, you know something’s wrong. It’s made worse when Chiron rings out your and Percy’s name, branding you as children of Poseidon. 

Poseidon. 

You have a father. And he’s known you all this time. Your ears hollow out like a rush of water in a cavern.

Luke is the first to kneel. The rest of the camp follows. You watch as the entire camp basks in the glory of newcomer Percy Jackson, so quickly claimed by one of the most powerful Gods of Olympus. And you, who has waited five years to earn even a shred of his favour. 

This thing you’ve wanted for so long is suddenly the greatest insult in the world. Your best friend can’t even meet your eyes. 

iv. i remember who i am when i'm with you

You stare at Percy as he unpacks his things. Waiting to see traces of yourself in his face, traces of your father. Anything that could give you an inkling of what he looks like. Of what you look like. Of how this happened in the first place. 

It’s a futile search. Percy’s blue eyes, his freckles, the bridge of his nose, they’re all … nothing. Half of you is half of him, but there’s no indication of which parts. The cabin is cold. You’re not going to sleep well without Luke nearby. You’re not going to sleep well ever again. 

You feel nothing but strife, your throat closing in every time you take even a second to think. You don’t want Percy to see you cry. So you do what you always do. 

This has to be in the running for most overwhelming day of all time ever. Even when submerged in your favourite place on earth, you can’t get away from your dad. Your dumb stupid dad that has made the things you love and has ruined your life. 

You swim hard, and you loathe how good it feels. At least you know why now, but that doesn’t do much to ease you. When you pop up again, the sun has started to sink into the sea. And Gods, you have to give your dad credit. The landscape is so gorgeous you almost forget how long he’s ignored you. 

You wonder if this is the last time you’ll find solace in the lake. If eventually, it’ll be nothing but an extension of your father’s neglect. 

The water ripples around you. You frown, barely having noticed it when someone taps your shoulder. You turn. “Luke?” You swallow, but why are you surprised? 

He’s panting, cheeks splotched with sun as he treads water, droplets worming down his face from his soaking curls. “Been looking for you,” he puffs, “Percy’s worried. Called you from the—from the thingie but don’t think you heard me.”

You assume he means the docks, but you don’t say anything as he takes a deep, grounding breath. “You’ve been out here for hours. Hours. For a second I thought you drowned.”

“Now we know that can’t fucking happen,” you mutter a touch too bitterly, staring down at your legs warped beneath the water. 

Luke’s silent as he watches you. “…Have you been crying?”

When you don’t reply, Luke tugs on your wrist. “C’mon, sailor, let’s go.”

“Not tired,” you say, frozen by the hot tears brimming on your lashes. 

“I’m not leaving you out here. Come on.” He frowns when you yank your hand away as he tries pulling you again. “You’re gonna get heatstroke.”

“I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not.”

He reaches for you again and you try to reject it for a moment, but he’s stronger than you, and he loves you better than even the water could. The second he has you close your resolve falters. He holds you against his shoulder, knees knocking against yours as you tread. 

“It’s okay,” he croons when you involuntarily start to cry. For a Poseidon kid, you can’t seem to control your waterworks. “It’s okay, I know.”

His hand cards through your scalp and you relish in the warmth of his bare skin on your cheek. He smells like comfort. You cling to it with all you have, until your nails start to dig into his skin and your eyesight blurs. 

“Come back with me and I’ll dry you off, okay?” He kisses the top of your head, the way you dreamed it last night. “I’ll take care of it.”

You’re not sure which it he’s referring to, because it could honestly apply to anything. When you both set off for shore, you’re so distracted by your own misery that Luke’s actually able to keep up with you. He’s up on the dock before you so he can pull you out. 

The second you’re out of the water you feel like you’ve been gutted with a lead pipe. All the energy it gave you leaves, and you realize just how right Luke was about spending too much time out there. You can’t feel your legs. 

You buckle over almost instantly, but Luke holds you before you can even think of falling. “I’ve got you,” he assures, guiding you down to sit on the dock. Your eyes are too weak to even admire the sunset. Luke drapes a towel over your shoulders, rubbing it over your arms, a welcome familiarity. He takes his time, wringing your hair and drying your back as you gaze blankly ahead. There’s a tenderness to it now. Luke’s ruthless when it comes to a lot of things. When it comes to how he loves, too. But there’s nothing demanding here. He lets your tears fall in silence, undisturbed, the touch of his hands through the cloth a silent promise. 

When you’re fairly dry, he fetches something then quickly comes back. “Here.”

It’s his shirt. You only notice you’ve been shivering as he pulls it over your head, lets you fill in the sleeves, gently gathers your hair back. “Thanks,” you say. His fingertips brush your neck as he hooks them around your necklace to rest it over the shirt. You think he does it to remind you you’re still the same. You’ve had five years together. It doesn’t have to end now. 

“Why did it take him so long?” You struggle to say, eyes glossed like sea glass. “Why—why now? What did I do?”

Luke puts an arm around you. “I don’t know,” he mumbles honestly. 

You sink into his warmth like a wave meets the shore. “Five years, Luke. He ignored me for five years. And he takes Percy right—right away.” It’s hard not to choke between every word. “I just thought I’d never get claimed, and I was fine with that, and now I’m … this!”

Its hard to tell if the dampness of your cheeks are the remnants of saltwater or your tears. “I don’t want this,” you sniffle. “I waited so long … and I just don’t want it.”

Luke rubs your shoulder, lips pursed against your head. He murmurs into your hair, “I know, sailor. It’ll be okay. Promise.”

His voice is reserved. You look up at him. His jaw is resolute, his eyes red-rimmed in a way you hadn’t noticed before. “You’re upset too,” you comment quietly. 

He laughs listlessly. “Yeah, of course I am. I’m losing my favourite cabin mate.”

You sniff and try to smile. “Percy?”

He rolls his eyes fondly, and it feels like all you want. He squeezes your shoulders tight and you long desperately to be closer. “I just don’t know what I did wrong,” you whisper, pressing your cheek into him. “Why didn’t he see me until he saw Percy? Am I just … unremarkable or something?”

“No, no. Absolutely not—c’mere.” Luke loops an arm around your waist and manoeuvres you into his arms, cradled on his lap so you can bury your face in his neck. You can’t stop fucking crying, but his patience for you is infinite. “You are by far the most remarkable person I know.” He seals you against his chest, scratching your scalp the way he knows you like. “None of this is you, okay? Your dad’s an idiot. You are—you’re everything. They’re all mindless up there, they don’t know how to love you. They don’t deserve to.”

An edge seeps into his timbre that gives you pause. You feel weak, discarded. It sounds like he’s talking about a different person. But he’s right. He has to be, because he knows you better than you know yourself.

Luke keeps going. You peek at his face when he speaks. Stubborn as ever. “He doesn’t have any fucking right to you. If he wanted that he should’ve claimed you when you got here. You have a life. You … you had a home. And now just because he’s got another kid he kills two birds with one stone? He pretends like this is some Godly intervention? Like he didn’t ignore you the whole time you’ve been here because he couldn’t stand how much you didn’t need him? How much better you are? You’re my …” He struggles, brows furrowed, the sun melting in his eyes. “You’re my best friend, and we’re supposed to be together. He’s not allowed to take that from you.”

Your heart stirs. “Sounds like you’re jealous,” you try to tease.

Luke heaves a sigh, his muscles rippling against your chest. You’re suddenly aware of the fact that he’s got no shirt on. And that he’s pressed against you in a way that makes you question if you should be this close. Beads of water cling to the divots in his skin, and you linger a little too long on one nestled in his collarbone. You swear you think this every time he goes swimming with you: when did he get so … hot? And every time you think it, you want to gouge your heart out with a spoon. 

“Can you blame me?” A melancholy smile plays on his face. “I liked having you all to myself.”

Tears spring to your eyes all over again. “I liked that too.”

It’s a whisper that sends you forward, Luke bringing his forehead to your own, and you want to live in the warmth that coils through you. His nose catches against yours when he laughs, but he doesn’t move. You take a moment to savour it. You think he does too.

He wipes a tear off your face as you say, “I’m still yours.”

“Yeah?” Luke hums a bit, his hand sliding up your waist in a most unfriendly manner. “How?” 

You catch the glimmer in his eyes, that plucky smile he’s had since fourteen. Something shifts.

“What are you asking me, Luke?” You can’t fight the smile. 

“What do you want me to ask you?”

“I dunno, what do you want me to want you to ask you—”

“My Gods, you’re a pain in the ass.”

He groans, throws his head back, and kisses you like you aren’t the most annoying person in the world. 

It’s so cliché, but for a brief moment your strife is well worth it. You yank him closer before he pulls away. It’s a little unsure, the two of you so used to toeing the line, but soon you’ve given in and your hands are in his hair, mouths parting, and it’s messy and wanting and everything you need. 

Luke slips his hands beneath the hem of your shirt, palms flattening against your sun-beaten skin. It feels so good, better because the shirt is already his, a whine scratching your throat as he moves up so his thumbs graze the skin beneath the tie in your bathing suit. 

“Oh, sailor,” he coos against your mouth. You want to retaliate but it’s lost when he squeezes your thighs, warming you in all the right places. It’s hard to understand this is even happening—it feels like you’re underwater, a blissful fuzziness growing in your head entirely at his mercy. 

He razes kisses down your still-damp neck, catching pearls of water on his tongue. You cling to his shoulders, raking your hands down his back just so you can feel more of him. Luke’s dropped down to your collarbone at this point, tugging the neck of your shirt down as his teeth graze the bone. “You’re my best friend,” he mutters over your skin. “Still mine. Always mine.”

“Mmhm,” is all you can say back, the husk in his voice making your eyes screw shut. He teases a spot so sensitive you groan and laugh at the same time. The regret is immediate, but you feel a chuckle pass his lips, too. “Luke,” you purse a smile. He dots kisses back up your neck until you start returning the favour. 

You kiss his jaw, a few spots on his neck, feeling the flex of his muscle all around you as he squeezes the fat of your hips. You finally sweep up the water in the hollow of his collarbones, and his grunt of your name makes you, frankly, delirious. 

He brings your mouth back to his, skin sticking to each other. It’s harder to kiss as fervently when you’re both giggling against each other’s tongues, running fingers along the planes of each other’s bodies trying to see which places feel new and which are known from memory. It’s a fifty-fifty split, and you love it. 

Somewhere along the way he peeled off your shirt because it was clinging in places you knew he wanted, but now you’re panting and giggling into his hair, his nose pressed into your neck, both of you melded together with salt and sun. “You really know how to cheer a girl up, mailman,” you grin. 

His lips fix to your skin. “Really? You’re still gonna call me that right now?”

“Yeah.”

“Like it better when you call me captain,” he murmurs, nose grazing along your pulse. 

You swallow, “That doesn’t work unless we’re doing the whole sailor-ship bit.”

“We’re always doing the sailor-ship bit.”

“I seriously can’t believe I’m in love with you.”

He sighs warmly at the words. “You have no idea how much I’ve been dying for you to say that. Even though I knew you would.”

You roll your eyes as he presses his forehead to yours, and you’re more glad than ever that his face is the one you love so much. It’s a pretty great face. 

“You’re gonna be okay,” he says tenderly. “You’re too incredible for Poseidon. You’re worth more than that.”

He still looks gorgeous blurred by your tears. You listen to the beat of his heart and the waves rolling. “More than any water anywhere?”

“More than the fucking Styx, sailor. I’ll promise you that.”

That night, Luke stays with you and Percy in your cold chapel of a cabin. You exchange stories until Percy falls asleep in his bed, curled up like a sea otter. “He’s a drooler,” Luke notes fondly, eyes flicking to yours. “Like you.”

You shove his chest playfully until he wraps his arms around you and anchors you to sleep, like every night before. This time, as you drift off, he kisses your forehead again. Once because he loves you, and twice to make sure you know it’s real. 

luke taglist: @sunniskyies @apollos-calliope @lillycore @sunny747 @m00ng4z3r @pabkeh @thaliagracesgf @theadventuresofanartist @bonnie-tz @ash-williamsss @sucker-4-angst @kitkat-writes-stuff @too-deviant

let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!

[lavenderspence]

Missing the happy hormone | S.R.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Content warning: emotional reader, period mention, fluff

Word Count: 1.8K

Summary: Apparently Spencer Reid could make anything better - even the emotional disaster of being on your period

A/N: First, huge thank you to the cutie that sent in this request, you literally caught me while on my period so this was born. Also, here’s to my inability to write short fics, this is your only warning that i can make and will make anything long, lol. Also, my titles suck omg. And shoutout to my crazy bestie for making me a Mamma Mia girly, she rocks.

But also, happy one month to this blog! When I carved out this little space for myself a month ago I wasn’t really sure how I’d feel being back here and writing again, but so far it’s been a treat. A huge thank you for all of your support and love and thank you to my mutuals and everyone that interacted with my blog. 💕 Here’s to many more months to come!

Request: spencer x fem!reader on her period/ovulating and shes in tears all the time?? Im ovulating and have been crying for hours and keep calling my mom lmaoo he’d been so lovely and sweet I know it I can feel it in my bones

masterlist

It was a slow day at the BAU. The most exciting thing in the 6 hours Spencer had spent at work was Rossi’s invitation to dinner the following weekend. 

Paperwork had piled high after their last 2 cases, so every team member was hunched over their desk, writing and revising reports. It was a never-ending cycle - finish a report, close the file, open a new one, and start all over again.

His eyes had started getting tired after four and a half hours, his hand had started cramping and he was down two pens so far, yet there was still a prominent pile on his desk.

He suspected Morgan and Emily might have pushed a file or two from theirs onto his load, seeing as he was getting done the fastest. Regardless, every few hours JJ was bringing even more to pile on top of everything that wasn’t finished, so buried in paperwork they stayed - no matter how fast he wrote or read, or how used to the load he was.

He was just thinking about getting up to prepare a fresh pot of coffee so he could function properly for a few more hours when his phone started ringing. He felt around the pockets of his suit jacket, where it sat draped on his chair, and then pulled it free. 

His display showed an incoming call, a picture of you as he hugged you, hands around your middle and face almost buried into your neck, a soft smile gracing both your faces. A scenery rich with reds, browns, and yellows stood behind you, the beauty of fall was nothing short of spectacular. 

The picture you’d taken last year when the team spent a weekend at Rossi’s cabin in the woods, surrounded by the beauty of landscapes and leaves, nature for miles. 

He accepted the call right away, a small smile on his face. 

“Hey sweetheart.” His voice was gentle, if a little raspy from misuse. He hadn’t talked much in the last few hours - just a distracted short answer here or a hum there. He was happy you were calling, though, welcoming the reprieve from the most recent report. 

It was silent for a few seconds, and he wondered absentmindedly if maybe you hadn’t called him on accident, and then there came a tiny little sniffle from your side. 

“Sweetheart?” He prompted, “Are you there? What’s going on?” Worry was starting to creep into the base of his spine, but he still remained calm and kept his voice gentle. 

“I’m here. Hi.” Another small sniffle, “All’s good. Just…I was just wondering how much longer you’d be gone.” Your voice was small,like you thought you might upset him by asking, and a little crackly, like you yourself were upset about something. 

His eyebrows furrowed, and he checked the time quickly - 3:57 pm. 

“Probably about two more hours, there’s a lot of paperwork we need to go through.” His eyes met Emily’s as she sent him a curious, questioning look. 

“Oh, okay.” The resignation was clear in your voice, “I’ll see you later then.” The call ended abruptly, and it took him a second to catch up.

He couldn’t help but feel like not everything was as good as you claimed it was. For one, you rarely called to ask when he’d be home - you knew his work could span into the late hours, or even stretch for days. You let him update you on any changes in his work schedule. 

In your interactions, your voice was usually upbeat and teasing - especially on the phone. Your kindness was always evident in your voice, as was your mood. You were a sunshine person, if he ever met one, that’s probably why you and Penelope formed such a close bond upon meeting. 

There was something that nagged him - a change in your mood he could pick up on just by your voice - too low, too small, and the cracks that he could now identify as he replayed your conversation in his head. You were keeping yourself from crying out, and yet there was nothing more apparent than the tears in your voice. And that made him worry. 

“Reid, are you okay?” Emily’s voice snapped him from the hard stare he’d been giving his phone in the last several minutes since the call ended. 

“I…I don’t know.” His eye twitched, and he cleared his throat before he tried and failed to articulate exactly what was happening - he himself had a hard time understanding. One thing he knew was that he needed to get home. “I..um, I need to go. Can you, please?” He asked, gusting at the remaining three files on his desk before he pulled his suit jacket on and grabbed his satchel. 

Morgan and Emily shared a mildly concerned look before they both nodded their heads, “Yeah, go. Text to let us know if everything is okay.” Morgan reminded him before he exited the bullpen with a fast step and tried to keep calm.

He was aware the situation wasn’t anything that he needed to be incredibly worried over - if something was really wrong, he knew you would have let him know. Yet, he couldn’t help the way his heart constricted by the sound of your voice, or the overwhelming desire to come home and gently hold you, see what could have caused this behavior. 

You were curled up on the couch, watching as Donna helped Sophie get ready for her wedding, the gentle melody of “Slipping through my fingers” filling the empty apartment. Your eyes were watering, to the point that everything was starting to get blurry. A shaky exhale left your lips.

Today has simply been a rollercoaster. Kissing Spencer goodbye this morning was the highlight of the day. What followed was nothing short of an emotional disaster. 

You’d teared up during breakfast, images of picking berries with Spencer flying through your mind. The desire to make it a reality was strong. 

Following that had come the overwhelming urge to bawl your eyes out, for no apparent reason whatsoever. Just cry and cry until you had it all emptied out and you could take a deep breath and continue with your day. So, cry you did, and then you’d finished with your chores for the day. 

Apparently letting it all out and emptying your tear supply hadn’t happened. Seeing as around 3:30 you’d started missing your boyfriend so much, the need to hear his voice had won out, so you’d called him. You felt the need to have him home to hold you because this month’s visit from mother flow was making you feel like a crybaby.

But then there was disappointment at the notion that you needed to wait close to 3 hours before that could happen. So you quickly ended the call before he could pick up on the tone of your voice, and then you shed a few tears. 

Now here you were, rewatching Mamma Mia because you really needed a pick me up, and once again, eyes shining as the tears started falling. At this point, it was a losing battle, so you let them fall, humming to the song with a broken voice. 

That’s exactly how Spencer found you, not a minute later. His keys were in his hand, the satchel on his shoulder, and he was just a little bit out of breath. 

The moment his eyes met you, they softened as he dropped everything and sat down next to you. His hand reached up and he cradled the side of your face, wiping your tears away. 

“Hey, sweetheart. What’s wrong?” He asked in a whisper.

“Look at Donna painting Sophie’s nails, it’s...” You hiccuped, another wave of tears washing over you. “And you’re home, why are you home?” Your question was met with a furrow in his brow, as his thumbs continued wiping underneath your eyes. 

“You called.” He answered simply. 

“But you said-” He stopped you before you could finish your sentence.

“I did, yes. But you sounded off and sad, so. Want to tell me what’s going on?” He prompted you gently as he pushed your hair back and pulled you into his lap after, feeling like you needed the physical contact. 

You weren’t ashamed to admit it, per se, but you were ashamed that your hormones had caused him to leave work and race home to be with you. 

“It’s my period,” you mumbled, hands wrapping around his neck as you hid your face in his chest, too tired to prevent your eyes from watering again. “It’s been going on all day. Randomly, I’d just get so emotional, and the tears would start. I was missing you so much too, and then hearing the song, bam, tears again. I’m so done with this Spence.” You sounded barely coherent, with your face pushed as close to him as possible. 

It all made sense now, you’d been cranky a few days ago, and then you’d told him last night your cramps were unbearable, so he knew you were on your period, but right now he felt like an idiot for not figuring it out himself. 

“It’s okay, everything is fine. The drop in estrogen and progesterone, following your ovulation triggered this. This in turn reduced the production of serotonin, your happy hormone. So, we just need to boost it a bit.” He whispered into your ear as you played with the hairs at the nape of his neck. 

“How?” You sighed into his chest, almost being able to pick up on the sound of his heartbeat.

He got deep in thought for a few seconds as you breathed in his scent, and a sense of calmness slowly overtook you now that he was home and holding you. One of his hands was running soothing circles on your back as the other held your hand, fingers interlocked. 

“How about we take a trip to the store and get you some snacks? We’ll pick up dinner on the way home and then I'll hold you some more and you'll pick a movie for us to watch.” He suggested, kissing the crown of your head once, twice, and many more times until you gave him an answer. 

“Yeah, yeah, I think that would help, but just having you here has done wonders.” You finally laid your head against his chest, looking up to meet his eyes. He smiled, and so did you. Having him here really had helped immensely, and when had it not? He was your other half, your rock, and even when your emotions ran rampant or you were feeling down, just his presence, his touch, and his understanding were enough to make it all okay. 

Later in the evening, Penelope sent you a photo of Sergio sleep-hugging a little plushy you’d gotten him, and the waterworks started all over again. Luckily, Spencer was there, wiping your tears and kissing your head, saying a thousand things without actually speaking a word.

Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated!

Requests are open for both Spencer and Hotch if you want to send any!

[bananayuyu]

Cabin Fever [part 1]

Pairing: Yunho x f reader

Genre: fluff and smut

Word count: 9.8k

Summary: A trip to the woods with your friends is always the highlight of your year. But sometimes, your body gets in the way of you being able to enjoy anything. Thankfully someone is there to comfort you, in just the way you need.

Warnings: MDNI, smut, fingering, reader is on her period while said fingering is occurring, reader has really severe period cramps

A/n: My period this last week was the worst one I've had in a while, and I kept thinking the whole time I wished Yunho was there to comfort me. This is for my fellow chronically ill besties <3 I hope everyone is taking good care. Also I'm thinking of making a part two, if not turning this into a whole series as I have so many ideas of where to take things. Let me know your thoughts!

You can read part 2 here!

Every year you and your high school friends visited your favorite cabin in the woods. It was cozy and old and probably too small for the seven of you; it was perfect for a summer get away. Each year you all saved up, and when the weather became too hot to bear in the city, you booked a week in the forest. The natural hot spring tub out back, the easy trails on the mountain behind, and the trees that occasionally graced you with their delicious fruit, made it your favorite place. Each and every summer you anticipated it with a giddiness that nothing else could make you feel.

***

You lived with two of your friends from high school, in a small two bedroom house not far from the neighborhood you grew up in. You and Seonghwa each had a bedroom, and Yunho's bedroom was the basement. You wouldn't have thought living with two men would lead to the clean and orderly house you resided in, but thankfully Seonghwa was as much of a clean freak as you. You lived meticulously, due to having many health issues that had been with you your whole life.

It started when you were little, with allergies developing what felt like every week. You had to be careful with what you ate, what you drank, what medication you took. Then there were the fainting spells, which started in high school. Eventually it was understood that your blood pressure was to blame, and your weak heart. And then there were your periods. Always horrible, no matter what you did. You had been put on every type of hormonal birth control at one point or another, and nothing worked. Finally you decided it wasn't worth it anymore, the hoards of drugs and doctor's appointments, and you decided to live a simple life instead, to take things easy, to not ever push too hard. To stop trying to force your body to be normal. You didn't really have a choice in the matter; your body broke down whenever it needed to, and school and work and your social life had to be pushed aside. It made these yearly trips to the woods all the more exciting. Sometimes it was the only time you got to see the group together all year.

This year as you, Seonghwa and Yunho prepared for your trip you realized one achingly frustrating thing. Your period was due to arrive on the fourth day of the trip, if it came on time. You sighed heavily when you realized this, dragging yourself up to grab pads, tampons for the hot spring, your massive bottle of Tylenol and your heating pad, and placing them in your suitcase. You just hoped it wouldn't be too bad, if it did come during the trip. Sometimes they could be late or early, and you hoped that maybe this time your body could make things easy on you, and delay it just a bit.

That night you fell asleep on the couch, accidentally staying up reading too late. As the morning light broke through the blinds you stirred, eyes squinting at the brightness. You groggily made your way towards the bathroom, barely seeing where you were going. You almost ran right into Yunho as he walked down the hall towards the kitchen, and he grabbed your shoulders to prevent you from crashing into each other.

"Good morning," he said, laughing at the state of you.

"I fell asleep on the couch," you groaned.

"Yeah I know, I saw. The book was that good?" he teased. You rolled your eyes. He didn't totally understand your obsession with reading.

"So good it almost felt like I was playing a video game, or something," you teased back.

This was the nature of your relationship with him. He was one of your closest friends by far, but you two were just so different. You worked part-time as the assistant of an accountant, and in your free time read books. He was a choreographer with a crazy schedule, and loved nothing more than gaming whenever he could. He was full of energy; you were prone to exhaustion and fainting. He needed his busy schedule, his stimulating life. You could barely handle leaving the house most of the time. But regardless of these differences your friendship blossomed. With Seonghwa it was sweeter; he was the sweetest person you'd ever met. He was usually the one who took care of you when you'd had a bad allergic reaction, or helped clean up your room when you were far too exhausted to. But Yunho had been there every time you'd had a bad fainting spell, carrying you to the hospital, staying with you overnight. He was always there for you, and made you laugh when you felt like shit. He was an invaluable part of your life, even if he didn't totally understand you.

"Ari texted the group chat late last night, did you see?" he asked you. Ari was the only other girl in the friend group, and you usually shared a room with her on your trips.

"No, what did she say?"

"She's bringing San," he said.

"Ooh, we finally get to meet him for real," you reply, lifting your eyebrows in excitement at finally meeting her new boyfriend. You'd seen pictures and talked to her about him for hours, and you couldn't wait to finally meet him in person.

"And Wooyoung is gonna bring his cousins, I think?"

"Yeah he said he's bringing Yeosang and Jongho with him this year," you reply, having just heard the news the day before while packing. "There's going to be so many of us this year, I'm not sure how we'll all sleep and everything."

"We'll figure it out when we get there," Yunho says reassuringly. Then he looks at you and chuckles. You narrow your eyes, knowing he's laughing at you. "Just go look at yourself in the mirror," he says.

You playfully shove him out of the way and make your way into the bathroom, seeing your ridiculously messy hair he was laughing at. You quickly get yourself ready for the day, knowing you all have to leave soon to pick up Ari and meet up with everyone else. When you make your way to the kitchen you see that Yunho has made you a cup of chamomile, your favorite tea. As you sip it you taste the honey he added and smile, smile at the way he seemed to read your mind. You were craving chamomile with honey today.

Seonghwa exits his room looking extremely put together in a black turtle neck and fitted black pants, his suitcase fully packed and his hair perfectly coiffed. You look down at your tank top and comfy jean shorts, and back up to him.

"You always make me look so underdressed," you say with a small pout.

"Well, you're so beautiful so you don't even have to try," he says, pulling you into a hug. A crazy thing for him to say to you, given that he's literally employed as a model. And quite successfully, at that. "Some of us have things to compensate for, clearly." He spins around, showing you his outfit and laughing at himself.

"It looks so good, but you are going to burn up in the car, Hwa," you reply.

"I'll be fine, I'll be fine," he laughs.

"He's got someone to impress, y/n, remember," Yunho interjects, handing Seonghwa the cup of coffee he made for him. Hongjoong is who he means. You giggle of the memory of them hooking up at the last summer trip, thinking they were being so sneaky when everyone knew exactly what was happening.

"How are you simultaneously so annoying and so nice," Seonghwa says to Yunho, making you all laugh.

"That's the perfect description of him," you say, shooting Yunho a smirk.

"How dare you both," Yunho replies as he makes his way down to the basement to grab his bag. He also stops by your room and grabs your suitcase, taking both down to the car and placing them in the trunk. You and Seonghwa follow after him, your tea in one hand and book in the other. You couldn't wait for a little time spent reading in the cabin.

"It's so funny how he always carries my stuff for me, like I'm some weak little thing," you say to Seonghwa.

"Well you kind of are, honey," Seonghwa says, looking at you softly. Your health issues had been flaring up again recently, and it broke his heart to see his close friend suffering so much.

"I know. It's annoying," you reply, looking away from him as you exit your house. "I just hope nothing happens while we're on the trip."

"We'll all take care of you if anything does," he says, wrapping his arm around your shoulder to comfort you.

"Thank you," you reply as you climbed into the back seat. You make eye contact with Yunho through the rear view mirror, his look attentive and curious.

"Ready?" he asks you, and you nod, holding his gaze. Since living with him, and really even since high school, he had driven you basically everywhere. You couldn't help but love it.

***

After meeting up with everyone at Ari's apartment you split into your two cars. You, Yunho, Seonghwa, Ari and her boyfriend San would be in Yunho's car. And Wooyoung, Hongjoong, Mingi, Yeosang and Jongho would be in Wooyoung's. You weren't sure how having ten people in the cabin would go, but you decided not to worry. This time of year was not for dread or anxiety; it was for joy and laughter.

After spending time on the drive talking to Ari and San, you realized he was just as handsome and kind as she told you. You squeezed her arm in excitement, elated that your friend had such a wonderful new boyfriend. Yunho and Seonghwa had expressed concern when they first started dating, given that Ari's last relationship wasn't healthy. But even they seemed swayed by just a few hours with San, with his sweet smile and warm conversation. You all arrived in the highest spirits, you and Ari ditching the car to let the boys carry your things while you excitedly ran to the backyard to dip your toes in the hot spring.

"God, I'm so excited we're back," she said, grabbing your hand. "And I'm excited you're meeting San. What do you think, so far?"

"He seems wonderful. Are you happy, is he always this kind?" You look at her fondly, wanting nothing more than for her to finally experience a healthy love.

"I'm so happy dude. It's just been so smooth, so calm. It's built the way I think these things are supposed to, you know? No rushing, no fighting and making up and fighting again. None of that awful shit that I used to look for. I feel like I'm finally an adult. I guess 25 is my 18," she laughs.

"Girl I'm 25 and barely even independent from my parents. You don't need to feel bad about what's come before." You squeeze her hand, a silent message of love passing between you. "I'm so, so happy for you."

As you make your way inside Yunho calls you over to him.

"Hey, we were just discussing sleeping arrangements. We were thinking Ari and San can have the room with the actual queen bed, and the rest of us boys can sleep in the living room on the couches. There's that little bed nook in the library, would you be okay sleeping there? I know you and Ari usually shared the real bed but I figure her and San would want to sleep in the same room together," he says.

"Oh, of course. But, are all of you going to fit out here with Yeosang and Jongho along?" you ask.

"Well, I'm not sure. We'll see."

"Isn't there a pull out couch in the library?" you ask. It's no surprise you know the small room better than him.

"There is?" he asks.

"Come, let's go see." He follows you through the cabin to your favorite room, seeing the small blue couch in the corner.

"I swear this thing extends or something," you say, crouching down to try to find where to push. Eventually it gives and starts moving, surprising Yunho. When it's finally extended it takes up a lot of the room, and looks almost goofy. But it's reasonably long, definitely somewhere someone else could sleep. You look up at Yunho, assessing how tall he is and how long the bed is. "Think you could fit?" you ask.

Yunho lays himself down, his legs hanging only slightly off the end of the new bed. You go and grab a pillow from your bed nook, tucking it underneath his head.

"Well it can fit one person, for sure. I doubt any more though, unless any of the boys want to be cuddled up that close," he says.

"Seonghwa and Hongjoong?" you offer. Yunho laughs.

"You want them in here doing stuff at night right next to you?" he asks. You cringe at his suggestion.

"They wouldn't do that to me," you say, shaking you head at him.

"You never know," he says, starting to make his way out of the room. "If you really just want the room to yourself, that's okay."

"No it's totally fine. You can sleep in here, if you want to. Or Seonghwa. I'd be okay with either of you. Just let me know."

Yunho nods as you both exit, heading back to the kitchen where everyone is getting ready to make dinner. Wooyoung has nine assistants today, far more than he really needs. But it's fun, bustling around the kitchen with everyone as you prepare a big feast to celebrate the start of the vacation. Soon you see Yunho carrying your bag to the library and soon after, his own bag. And you feel something in you become warm, something low in your gut.

"What are you thinking about?" Ari asks you, seeing the distant look in your eyes.

"Huh?" you say as you turn to her, genuinely surprised.

"You looked like you were daydreaming or something."

"Oh no, just spacing out, sorry," you chuckle, not sure what had just come over you.

"Well look what I got you," she says, holding up a giant bag of your favorite cheesy crackers.

"So I guess you can read my mind or something?" you joke, grabbing the bag and her in a big hug. "Wait, wait right here. I have something for you too."

You run over to the library to grab the bracelet you made Ari last month. You still hadn't had a chance to give it to her and you couldn't wait. As you enter you see Yunho slowly unpacking his bag, setting his phone and charger on the small end table by the blue couch. You rifle through your own bag to find the small box you had packed for Ari, yourself unpacking a few things in the process. In the silence of the moment you begin to feel warm again; you look over at Yunho and soak in his messy hair, his loose clothing that makes him look so soft and comfy. You stare unabashedly, unsure of what's come over you. Usually you hate starting, hate eye contact.

"What?" is all he says, but you feel like there might be something more he wants to ask.

"So you're staying in here?"

"Yeah, Hwa wants to stay with Hongjoong out there. I figured you would rather it just be one person in here with you, more comfortable for you."

You smile and reach your arms out to him, still sat on the floor. He gives you a quizzical look, unsure what your gesture means.

"Come, give me a hug," you say. "You've been so thoughtful today."

In the short moments of your hug a silence hangs around the two of you. Yunho had never been one for serious sincerity. He definitely never knew what to say when you said things like this. When he stayed with you in the hospital and you cried in his arms, thanking him endlessly for being there with you. When your allergic reactions left you weak and groggy and you wouldn't stop telling him how much you loved him, and how much you worried he'd abandon you for being so needy and sick. You said the same to Seonghwa too, but Yunho could understand that better. It made more sense to him. When you said it to him it made his brain stop in a way that he still hadn't figured out.

***

The evening was off to a perfect start. Ari loved her bracelet, the project you had been promising to make her for months now, and everyone else loved it too. Everyone showered you with compliments and showered Wooyoung with them too, after tasting the delicious meal he had whipped up. You all gathered in the living room to eat, spreading out over the large L-shaped couches and the floor. A favorite cheesy movie was watched, a bottle of wine opened. Everyone laughed and relaxed, helping to clean up in the kitchen after the movie was over. And then to the hot spring you all went, as was tradition. You always started and ended the holiday with a group soak; attendance was mandatory.

In the heat and steam of the tub everyone opened up, even the most quiet among you. There was something about the nature of the tub that made everyone vulnerable, and for you it had always been one of the best parts of these trips. Everyone was cuddled up together given the size of the tub, and the proximity seemed to fuel the spilling of secrets. This year especially, with all ten of you, everyone was shoulder to shoulder. Ari sat on San's lap to try to save on space, and as everyone began piling in you ended up squeezed between Seonghwa and Yunho. The crowdedness felt like too much for you, and before he could make an objection, you decided to sit on Yunho's lap.

"There's not enough room in here," you said quietly to him when you felt his surprise.

"Yeah I know," he replied, letting you wrap his arms around you. You sensed some tension and hesitation in him, though.

"Should I move?" you asked, turning around to face him.

"No, no, you're fine. How else will we fit everyone?" he replied.

You turned around satisfied but then caught a smile on Mingi's face, one that seemed to be in reaction to you and Yunho. You shot him a confused look and he glanced away, clearly feeling caught in his reaction. And then you turned and saw Wooyoung eyeing you, too.

"What?" you said to him, turning your head and looking at him sideways.

"Nothing, nothing." But then his characteristic smirk formed on his lips; he had lost the fight in trying to delay it. You knew exactly what this meant.

"Oh god, don't tell me you have some huge piece of gossip to share with all of us," you said, sighing. It was always Wooyoung who started out with something, anything dramatic to share. He always broke the ice, and really, you appreciated it. Even if you made fun of him for being so obsessed with gossiping.

"Well, no, not really," he replied, looking almost shy. It didn't seem very characteristic of him. He took a deep breath and swallowed, and you all held your breath as you awaited his story.

"He has a crush," Mingi broke in, clearly not wanting to wait any longer. "It's this woman who choreographed for that music video we worked on a couple of weeks ago." Mingi and Wooyoung were backup dancers, and often worked on projects together.

"It's not just a crush, we're like kind of dating now," Wooyoung added, clearly shocking Mingi with this new information.

"Are you serious?" Mingi replied, and Wooyoung nodded his head. "Guys she's gorgeous. And so intense and smart. And isn't she like 40?"

"She's 37 Mingi, god," Woo replied, giggling and looking very pleased with himself. It had been a long time since he'd even been interested in dating, and everyone in the tub was looking surprised and amused. "We actually.... we hooked up on set one day."

"Wooyoung! Bad idea!" you replied, shocked he would even share this information. But then again, you were in the hot spring tub. And plenty of wine had been consumed.

"How did you even manage that?" Mingi laughed.

"In a trailer, you know.." Wooyoung trailed off, clearly embarrassed and nervous to tell the story. But just as always it had achieved the affect it needed to, and soon everyone was spilling their secrets, updating everyone on every funny thing that had happened in the past year. You continued to sip your wine, drinking slowly given how much of a lightweight you were. You hadn't finished your first glass still, even through the movie and dinner. Yunho kept making you drink water too, nervous that you'd become dehydrated and get sick. As the night wore on you relaxed more into his lap, more into his arms. You held his hands on your lower stomach, over that place that felt so warm earlier when you looked at him. Finally, when everyone decided to call it a night, he wrapped a towel around you both and led you through the dark path back to the house. In your tipsy state you kept repeating "shower, shower" so he led you there, running to grab your phone when you demanded it. As you stripped out of your swimsuit and took a look at yourself in the mirror you saw that happy girl you always saw here, surrounded by her favorite people and completely content. The shower was quick but felt delicious, and as you exited you felt blissful and relaxed. Until you realized you'd forgotten to bring a towel with you.

There were only two bathrooms in the cabin, one connected to the actual master bedroom with the actual queen bed, and one for everyone else to share. You couldn't walk through the house naked and dripping with so many people here, especially Wooyoung's cousins who you didn't know well. Thankfully your phone was still there on the counter where Yunho had left it, so you called him.

"Can you bring me a towel?" you asked when he answered. And then quickly, "and some clothes too, please."

"Anything else, your highness?" Yunho teased you.

"Shut up, I'm cold," you whined.

"What clothes do you want?" he asked.

"Just, those black shorts and one of my t-shirts, I don't care which. Just something comfy for sleeping in."

"No underwear?" he asked.

"Yes no underwear, I'm about to go to bed. I usually sleep naked but I have to wear clothes when we're here." You swore his breath hitched a bit.

"Be there in a moment," he replied before ending the call. In a moment he was there, knocking on the door. You opened it slowly, and saw him holding his arm out to you while dramatically facing his head the other way.

"You don't have to be so damn weird, I know you've seen plenty of naked humans in your life," you said, laughing at him.

"You make me sound like a slut," he replied.

"Maybe you are, how am I to know."

"I can't believe you of all people are calling me a slut."

"What the hell does that mean?" you ask, eyes wide.

"I know those little romance books you read are full of smut," he challenges you.

"I'm literally reading a book about history right now, thank you very much," you respond.

"Yeah the history of changing attitudes about sex. Even your non-fiction reads are horny."

You stand still for a moment, mouth agape. You didn't realize Yunho payed that much attention to the books you were reading. To know what he just said about your current book, he would have had to at least read the synopsis on the inside cover, if not a bit of the introductory chapter. You feel a little weird that he'd sneakily been perusing your book when you hadn't been looking, probably this morning while you were asleep on the couch, you guessed. But something about it felt really nice too. Like he cared to know you, cared to know about the things you liked. Even if they were so different from what he usually was into.

"Are you two good?" Seonghwa asked as he meandered down the hall, hearing the slight intensity in your tone during your conversation with Yunho. At the sound of his voice you both snapped out of it, and at seeing you naked he turned around with a quick, 'oh, sorry,' before heading back to the living room.

You dried off and dressed quickly, realizing you spent several moments naked in front of Yunho while you argued. It wasn't really an argument, more a discussion maybe? Or a confession? He admitted to knowing what kind of books you liked to read, and you hadn't denied it. None of it had to mean anything, you implored yourself. As you had said, he'd seen plenty of other people naked before. Well, at least several. It's just the trip, the glass of wine consuming your brain and making you fuzzy. But it felt like things had shifted that day.

***

As you and Yunho settled into bed you began chatting, and before you knew it, it was the early hours of the morning, the time you rarely stayed up to, the time when the world felt like a completely different place to you.

"I've missed you," you said, sighing into the comfort of the blankets and pillows beneath you.

"Me too," Yunho replied, quickly. Like the response was almost involuntary. You opened your eyes to look at him, as his words weren't what you were expecting.

"I'm sorry I've been so busy. I miss hanging out with you, just the two of us," he continued. "You're one of my favorite people on planet earth, you know that right?" It was completely out of character for him. Like the years of sincerity he'd kept inside had been begging to be let free and he finally obliged. You sat up and walked to the couch he laid on, mere steps from your bed. You leaned down next to him and hugged him, too tired to give a verbal response. You sighed and nuzzled your face into his shoulder, relaxing on top of him completely.

"Are you still tipsy?" he asked.

"No, why?" you asked. You were too tired to move your head.

"You're only this touchy when you're drunk usually."

"I don't really ever get drunk though."

"I know, I mean, this is how you used to get when you would get drunk. Like in high school, when we'd drink."

"Oh. Sorry?" you asked. You didn't really understand why he was telling you this.

"No, I like it. I was just, trying to joke around," he sighed. "Wasn't the right moment probably. Wasn't funny."

You fell into a silence again, briefly.

"So it's fine, right? I can hug you?" you asked.

"Yes, of course." To prove his point he wrapped his arms around you more tightly, one hand coming to rest on the back of your neck. "You seem happy right now, today."

"I am, these trips always make me happy," you reply.

"Your happiness means a lot to me." He seemed almost nervous to say it, like he had to work himself up to it.

"Why are you being so sappy today?" you laugh, nuzzling farther into him. He glanced at the clock on the wall, looking for an excuse.

"It's 2am, I don't know."

"Shit, it's that late? I should really get some sleep." You knew the plan for tomorrow was hiking up to the water fall, and though the hike was neither long nor strenuous, you still wanted to be well rested. "Goodnight," you said as you dragged yourself up, planting a quick peck on his cheek before crawling into your bed. Sleep enveloped you quickly, given the relaxing nature of the day and the late hour. Yunho turned himself over, trying to get comfortable on the small pull out couch. You didn't see the bright pink of his cheeks, or the rapid rise and fall of his chest. You had no idea you had any affect on him. A life of sickness had left you mostly uninterested in pursuing romantic affections, and you'd truly never dreamed of a long term romantic partnership with anyone. Yunho knew this, well. But he couldn't stop his feelings, no matter how hard he tried to.

***

In the morning you were woken by a bright, hot stream of sun that shined through the window, that late morning sunshine that is surprisingly warm on clear-skied days like today. With a groan you cracked open your eyes to see that Yunho had already awoken and left, the room silent. Your head felt groggy and your stomach ached a bit, and you instantly scolded yourself for drinking your first night and staying up so late. Sure, it had been fun in the moment, but you couldn't afford to make yourself feel poorly on such a special trip. You hoisted yourself up, taking a swig from your nearly empty water bottle that Yunho must have put on the side of your bed. You certainly didn't remember putting it there.

When you finally pushed yourself up to stand you felt something wet on your bed. You turned around expecting to find some spilt water, but were instead greeted with a disappointing and frustrating sight. A small streak of blood ran across the beautiful, light blue sheets. As you felt around your shorts you found a spot there too, wet and cold against your fingers. You let out a frustrated sigh, running yourself to the bathroom with a new change of underwear and shorts and a pad in hand. You desperately rinsed your shorts in the sink, your mind beginning to spin and spin. What were you going to do about the bedsheets?

As you came back into your small room you didn't notice Yunho, your focus entirely on where you could hang your shorts to dry. When he spoke you jumped back in complete shock, nearly falling over.

"You okay?" he asked, lurching forward to try to prevent you from falling. You thankfully caught yourself in time, but then your eyes wandered to your bed and you knew he'd seen.

"I don't know what I'm gonna fucking do," you started, tears forming your eyes from the embarrassment. It wasn't getting your period that made you feel so weird, it was the fact that you'd stained the nice bedsheets at the nice cabin you and your friends were renting, and it was only the second day.

"Well, what do you need? I'm sure we can get that stain out of the sheets," Yunho offered, hoping it would make you feel better.

"We? They have my blood on them," you responding, trembling. Why were you so worked up, what the hell had gotten into you? Your own anxiety at the situation shocked you and Yunho both.

"It's just blood, y/n. And it's like barely anything." Yunho grabbed your upper arms to steady you, worried your trembling would land you in a heap on the floor. And then suddenly, a horrible cramp stabbed its way through your abdomen. You immediately groaned and grabbed your side, leaning against one of the bookshelves to support yourself.

"Fuck, I need my Tylenol," you breathed out, trying to calm yourself. It felt like your entire body was collapsing on you in an instant. And your period had only just started early this morning, maybe only a few hours ago from the looks of it.

Yunho grabbed two Tylenol and and opened your water bottle, offering you both one after the other. He had seen Seonghwa do this many times and he hoped he was doing it right. You quickly swallowed the pills and took a deep breath, worried you wouldn't be able to join everyone for the hike that day. A tear slipped down your cheek and you quickly wiped it away, wanting to push down your feelings of discomfort.

"I just need to wait until this kicks in and I'll be okay," you said, hoping it sounded convincing. Hoping it was true.

"Let me clean your sheet, then," Yunho said, leading you down to lay on the pull out couch.

"Do you even know how to clean out blood?" you asked, shoving your face into his pillow. It smelled so good and suddenly you felt warm again, this time through your whole body.

"I was gonna ask Ari about it," he said. "If it's okay for me to tell her."

"Ask Hwa for help too, he knows," you replied. With a sigh you wrapped yourself tightly in his blanket, hiding your face. Everything that had happened this morning was so frustrating, and you couldn't stop feeling angry at your body for always ruining your plans.

Remarkably, twenty minutes later you did feel a lot better. No more severe jabs of pain had come, and once you got some food in you and washed your face, you felt ready for the day. Everyone packed their bathing suits for the falls and put on their good shoes for hiking, and with snacks and waters in hand you made your way up to the edge of the forest to find the start of the trail.

You walked arm in arm with Ari, picking flowers off the side of the path to put in each other's hair. The blossoms in this area were beautiful during this time of year, and the trees made the trail quiet and calm and cool. When you ran out of space in Ari's hair you started putting the flowers in Seonghwa and Hongjoong's too, the only other two who walked the trail as slowly as you and Ari did. Even with the slow pace you began to feel queasy about half way up, and when you sat down, unable to take it anymore, Seonghwa called out to Yunho. He came and crouched down in front of you, telling you to climb onto his back, and carried you the rest of the way, the gentle breeze blowing his hair into your face and tickling your nose. It was a bit longer now than it had been in a while, looking almost like a shaggy mullet. As it brushed across your face you realized you thought it looked really good on him, how it complimented his long neck and round cheeks. You shook your head trying to stir yourself out of your daydream. You had always recognized he was attractive, but you didn't like him like that, never had. Why did you care how well his hairstyle complimented his face?

At the falls you sat on a long log at the edge of the small lake, not feeling up to swimming and playing with everyone else. Seonghwa could sense it easily, and after Yunho asked for his help that morning cleaning your sheets he knew why. He sat with you, not bothering to put on his suit either. He had wanted to talk to you anyway, wanted to spend a moment alone. These trips were always fun but it was hard to get one on one time with anyone.

"You okay?" he asked as you watched the others playing in the water, Yunho and Mingi wrestling each other for an inflatable ball. It seemed like they were all playing some sort of water polo from the looks of things.

"Yeah, yeah. Just my period. How are you?" you asked turning to him, seeing the conflict behind his eyes.

"I'm... I'm fucking spiraling, girl." He shook his head and dropped it onto your shoulder, letting out a massive sigh.

"Why, cause of that guy?" you asked, looking in the direction of Hongjoong. Seonghwa just nodded. In the brilliance of the mid day sun Hongjoong looked like he was shining, his tattoos standing out starkly against his pale skin. The ball was in his hand and San lunged for him, and he threw it up just in time as they crashed into each other, a laughing mess. As the two came up for air San was repeatedly apologizing, the both of them being yelled at by the other players to get back in the game. After some more moments of play Hongjoong grabbed onto a rock on the side of the small lake underneath the waterfall, pulling himself up to grab a bottle of water a few feet away. As he pulled himself up you saw the ripple of his chest and abdomen.

"Damn, he's like really ripped," you said, smiling down at Seonghwa.

"Don't say shit like that to me," he groaned into your shoulder. "You're just making this worse."

"What's wrong? Why are you spiraling?" you asked him.

"Dude, I like him a lot. Like a lot a lot." Seonghwa's hand came up to his face, a small whimper escaping his lips. You knew he was on the verge of crying.

"Come here," you said, turning towards him to give him a proper hug. "Everything's gonna be okay."

"Not if he doesn't like me back," Seonghwa replied.

"He obviously likes you back, what do you mean?"

"I'm just, I just- I don't know what's going to happen. When we all go back to the city. When we're here we're all over each other but then real life comes and I barely see him. I thought I was over it. But clearly not." Soft tears fall from his eyes, down his cheeks and onto the dirt of the forest floor.

"Oh, honey. I'm so sorry," you replied, rubbing your hand up and down his back to comfort him. "You've got to talk to him about it."

"I know, I know, I just." He sighed. "I know I need to, and it's gonna be awkward as hell but I just need to."

"You can do it, I know you can," you said, squeezing him tightly. "Crushes are the fucking worst, aren't they?"

Seonghwa laughed as you separated, wiping the final tears from his cheeks and sighing more freely. He knew you'd always be there for him, no matter what happened. You didn't need to say it now. And you'd already discussed how it might be awkward for the group if they dated and then broke up. Last year, after your last cabin trip, it was discussed. Even with Yunho. You all agreed that Hwa should do what he wanted, and not worry about everyone else in the group. You were all adults now, and he didn't need to torture himself just to save everyone else's feelings. But it seemed he had tortured himself this last year, anyway. You had thought he maybe was over Hongjoong, that it was just a little fling at the cabin that year. But now you saw that wasn't true.

***

Back at the cabin Wooyoung made another delicious meal, and everyone gathered around the table in the living room for some charades. You took more Tylenol with dinner, your cramps having returned in full force once you made it back to your home base. All through dinner and games you tried to put on a smile, tried to get distracted in the fun. But it wasn't working. As soon as you finished your food you excused yourself, cleaned your dishes and then made your way to your room. You changed your pad for what felt like the fourth time that hour, then plugged your heating pad into the wall as you readied your bed. It was maybe only seven or eight in the evening, but you couldn't take it any longer. And your trusty Tylenol didn't seem to be working well tonight.

After some time resting in bed you heard the door open. Turning your head you saw Yunho walking in with a steaming cup of tea, gingerly handing it over to you to grab.

"How are you feeling?" he asked. The gentle light from the lamp in the corner made his eyes look soft and shiny. He looked down at you with concern, his eyes locked on yours.

"I'm okay," you managed, trying hard not to wince obviously at the pain that had just seared through you.

"I thought, some tea might help. I don't know," he said, his cheeks and ears going every so slightly crimson.

"It does, it's very soothing. Thank you, Yuyu," you said, his favorite nickname rolling off your tongue. Another streak of pain runs through you and you can't stop your face from scrunching up in pain, making Yunho's heart sink.

"What can we do, what makes it better?" he asked.

"There's not much, really, other than what I've done. I took my Tylenol, I've been drinking water, my heating pad, this tea..." You trailed off, smiling for a second at the only other method you know to help alleviate the cramps a bit.

"What, is there something else?" Yunho asked.

"No, well, not really. Basically, at home sometimes if my cramps are really bad it actually helps to like, you know, masturbate. Like it doesn't even necessarily feel super sexual, it just seems to help the muscles down there like relax, when they're all tight and like spasming and stuff." You quickly took a sip of your tea, suddenly noticing your heart rate had sky rocketed. "Obviously I can't do that here, so like it's not an option right now but, yeah, that just, uh, came to my mind."

"You can do that here, if it would help," Yunho replied, fascinated by your rambling. You really didn't get that way often, and he thought it was funny that this was the topic that made you this way.

"No, stop. Plus, I don't even have my tools or anything," you blurted out, suddenly wishing you hadn't.

"Tools?" he asked.

"You know, like, vibrator, dildo, et cetera," you replied, looking at him mildly mortified.

"Ah, I see," he replied with a simple nod of his head. "You don't have to be so nervous talking to me about this. I literally saw you naked last night. Plus, I swear I've heard you and Hwa talking about this kind of stuff a lot?"

Your body fluttered at his admission that he looked at your naked body, and suddenly you felt flushed and flustered. "It's different with him," you said, not meaning to sound so pissed.

"Why, cause he's gay and I'm not?" Yunho asked. He really was genuinely curious.

"Yeah, I guess, I don't know. Yunho, I can't do this right now. I feel like shit." Tears welled in your eyes at all of the conflicting feelings you were having, and you just wanted everything to stop.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you," he replied, his tone softer. He came over to stroke his hand through your hair, hoping it would distract you from your pain. "I just want to make you feel better."

"There's not really much to do, I just have to bear it. First day is always the worst. Go, have fun with everyone. I don't want this to ruin your evening along with mine."

With a final stroke of your hair Yunho stood, and repeating your action from the night before, leaned down and planted a kiss on your cheek.

"Feel better," he said. This time he saw the color come to your cheeks, and your shy smile as your turned your head away from him.

***

When he reentered your room it was dark, only the light from the moon illuminating the floor. Your heating pad was on the floor, and as he walked towards you it looked like you were asleep; your eyes were closed, breaths were steady and you were curled up on your side with your blanket tucked high into your neck.

He settled down himself, trying his best to be silent. The pull out couch wasn't the most comfortable place to sleep, if he was honest. But he really liked sleeping with you in here, and he was thankful you had let him. He had wanted to ask you straight away, when you showed him the pull out couch. But he treaded lightly, not wanting to push anything.

After a few moments spent responding to texts he finally settled into bed, curling up himself. He heard you shifting around slightly but figured you were just dreaming. Same with the changes in breath he swore he heard. He pleaded with himself to stop worrying and just let you be. But then, he heard a sniffle. Then another. And finally a small whimper, unmistakeable.

"Y/n, you're awake aren't you?" he asked, his voice low. All you could do was let out a groan in response. On instinct Yunho's body shot up, and within a second he was at the side of your bed peering down at you. "Hey, look at me."

You turned over slowly, the pain of your abdomen making it hard for you to move. You looked up at him and he caught a glimpse of your tear stained cheek, your blood shoot eyes and your puffy face. You had been crying, silently, for a while.

"Why did you turn off your heating pad?" he asked you.

"I need to sleep," you squeaked out, sniffling.

"But you're in pain," he said, resting his hand on your cheek. "Can I turn it back on for you?" You nod your head, feeling exasperated and desperate for relief.

"Are you sure there's nothing else that would help? What if I rubbed your back?" Yunho asked, as desperate for your pain to end as you were.

"That might help," you manage, closing your eyes and trying to take in the relief of your heating pad being back on.

Yunho crawls behind you on the bed, and slowly starts massaging you back, focusing his movements on your low back and side that you always seemed to grab onto. His hands feel searingly hot on your body, even with your thin shirt in between, and you begin to tremble uncontrollably.

"Sorry, I'm so cold," you tell him. "And I didn't bring anything warm to wear cause I'm stupid and assumed it would be hot out here."

"Hey, hey, stop that. You are not stupid," he replies. You feel him pull away for a second. "Here, sit up," he says as he reaches his arms out to help you. Before you know it you're being enveloped in the feeling of his hoodie that he just took off; it's warm and smells sweet. He settles back behind you, hands under the hoodie but still over your shirt as he continues to massage you gently. He can feel how tight the muscles in your back and side are, and he can't imagine how awful everything feels inside.

With his hoodie on and his hands on your back you feel like you're surrounded by him, and you aren't ready for the way it makes you feel. You're still groggy but you feel more grounded, and your body feels tingly and alive. It makes the pain almost more present, but it also makes everything else so clear, like the way his strong hands move along your side and the way the hoodie smells better than anything. Your body aches, even your legs, but it's your throbbing pussy that catches you off guard, the way his smell makes you want to open up and be taken.

All at once you realize the dilemma you are in. Being horny on your period wasn't exactly out of the ordinary, but now you were in a bed, horny on your period with a beautiful man, one who clearly loves you and wants nothing more than to make you feel better. You sigh, putting a hand on his to stop his movements, and you roll over to face him. His perfect face is inches from yours and you can't bear it, instead moving yourself down to bury your face in his chest. Your legs intertwine as you grab onto him, the two of you cuddling closer than you have in a very long time. He reaches his arm around you to keep rubbing your back, nuzzling his face into your hair. He's never told you, but he loves the smell of your hair so much. You use an unscented shampoo, due to your sensitivities. So he knows it's just your smell. And fuck it makes him feel creepy, but he's thankful every time you hug him and he gets a moment to take in that smell. Now, as always, he's fighting with himself to not get hard.

Your sighs become deeper as he continues to rub, and he reaches his hand under your shirt, testing the waters. You sigh blissfully at the skin to skin contact, his hand making your skin feel alive. As he keeps rubbing your head falls back, your body going nearly slack at how good it feels. You don't even realize for a moment but you've started moving your hips, rubbing yourself up and down his thigh that sits in between your legs. Your breath deepens and Yunho can't believe what he's seeing, his head swimming with desire as he watches your face, hears your soft sounds. A surge of pride washes through him at seeing how good you are feeling. "Baby," the word slips out of his mouth and you open your eyes, met with his large pupils and full pink lips.

"Kiss me," you whisper, opening your lips to let him in. He doesn't hesitate a moment, and suddenly your met with plush softness and his warm tongue as it brushes ever so slightly across yours. The feeling is intoxicating, igniting something in you that you hadn't felt in a long time. Your buck your hips against his leg harder, almost painfully, but it feels necessary. Your pussy is throbbing harder now, harder than you thought was really possible for you. You deepen the kiss, opening your mouth wider and sliding your tongue over his, moaning at the way it makes your clit feel. You need more, need something inside you soothing the aching muscles of your cunt, but you don't want to break the perfection of the kiss. You break away for a second, whimpering and throwing your head back in pained bliss. When your lips make contact again your hands are under his shirt and grabbing onto him, desperation dictating your every move.

"Please, can I touch you? Can I make you feel better?" he's asking, and his voice feels so good in your ear it's almost like you're on another planet.

"I'm bloody," you cry softly, the reality of the situation still not entirely escaping you.

"You really think I care about that?" he asks you, his hand coming up to brush along your cheek. You look at him with pleading eyes, wanting nothing more than to let him take care of you. Another wave of pain strikes through you and you whimper, grabbing your side again. Yunho brushes over it, kissing you gently on the cheek. More tears form in your eyes, the pain not subsiding this time. You begin to cry, your body shaking as you do. You don't know what else to do.

"Please help me," you plead out, still shaking.

"Where do you want me to touch you?" he asks, moving his hand down, now rubbing over your hip and upper thigh. The closer his hand gets to your core the more needy you feel, and you whine and buck your hips into him instead of responding.

"Baby please use your words, I don't want to hurt you," Yunho begs you, placing a gentle kiss on your lips.

"Inside, please. But be gentle, the muscles are so tight," you say with a pout, making Yunho's head spin.

"Wait a sec," he says, moving off your bed to grab a towel from his bag. He places it down next to you and then begins removing your shorts and panties, one at a time. He's slow and steady in his movements, which makes it feel all the more intimate. Once they are off he gently moves you onto the towel and then slowly spreads your legs, massaging your thighs as the muscles there are tight as well. Your short frame dwarfed in his hoodie is maybe the cutest thing he's ever seen, and the look of desperation on your face is maybe the hottest.

"Are you ready?" he asks, his voice low and his hands oh so close to where you need them. You nod, spreading your legs even more in an invitation. Slowly he makes his way up, gently brushing his hand over your exposed lips, hoping not to shock you with the contact. Once you've settled into his touch he finally starts circling your entrance, making you mewl in anticipation. He sinks one finger in and immediately you groan in relief, already feeling so full. He can't believe how tight you are, can't believe that only one finger can fit. He begins moving slowly, as gently as he can, stroking up and down and finding that spongy spot that makes your eyes roll back. Your body immediately starts feeling better, the muscles in your core finally having something to squeeze onto. Your pussy feels warm and perfect and he desperately wants to see you come undone, on his fingers, on his cock. As you relax into his touch he feels your walls finally open up a bit, and slowly he pulls back, this time pushing two fingers in.

The wave of pleasure is instant, filling your low belly with sparkly warmth. You begin to rock yourself onto his fingers too, desperate for a bit more. He starts moving with a bit more force, still holding back and scared to hurt you. It's just the right amount of speed and pressure and you find your mind drifting, everything around you feeling warm and tingly and soft. You don't pay attention to your sounds; you don't care. Finally after your terrible day of pain he's taking care of you, and you just relax and let your body take control. Your high is building, oh so slowly. You can feel it in your legs all the way to your toes, the sparklers dancing down your body. Yunho's own breathing deepens as you start to moan, his body reacting to your sounds of pleasure. He needs desperately to make you come, to make you feel good. But he can feel your body resisting, ever so slightly.

"Baby, relax, relax if you can," he coos down at you, stroking his free hand over your thigh muscles that still feel tight. "Just focus on what feels good."

Your mind goes to his long fingers, to how deep they are inside you, how perfect they feel. The pressure in the perfect spots, making your entire body loose and happy. Suddenly he moves his free hand up, his thumb stroking gently over your clit. You moan loudly, all of your muscles finally releasing, and suddenly the feeling builds out of nowhere, from your fingertips and your toes and the top of your head, surging towards your center. You come, gently at first and then harder as Yunho continued to stroke you, intense pleasure rolling over you. It takes a long time for you to fully ride it out, your whole body processing what just happened. Finally your head feels clear and settled, your body no longer achey.

In the moonlight Yunho cleans you up, kissing you and whispering, 'I'll be right back.' After cleaning his hand and helping you back into your panties and shorts, he wraps himself around you, kissing your cheek and your exposed neck and relishing the relaxed state of your body. You are out before you know it, his warmth sedating.

***

A light storm rolled over the mountain in the night, covering the sky in gentle clouds. Without the brightness of the sun to wake you, you and Yunho both slept in, your bodies wanting nothing other than rest and each other's company. In the later hours of the morning Seonghwa became concerned, worried that you weren't doing well. When you left dinner early the night before he worried too, but when Yunho checked on you and returned assuring him that you were fine, he had let it go. He never wanted you to feel bothered, like he was keeping too close of an eye on you. You were your own person and capable of asking for what you needed. He knew that.

But when the time reached 11am he couldn't stop himself. It was just weird, given how early you had gone to bed, and the fact that you were normally an early riser. Gently he opened the door to the library, feeling mildly awkward. He wasn't sure what he would be greeted with, thought he did have a few ideas. He shook his head trying to brush his suspicions away. He knew if they were really true, you both would have told him.

"Y/n," he called from the open door, not seeing Yunho on the couch. Your body was hidden by the nook in the wall you slept in, forcing him to walk more into the room. You groaned at the sound, coming up from such a deep state of sleep. You didn't realize where you were, didn't realize Yunho was still cuddling you. As you went to stretch you accidentally hit him, waking him up with a jolt.

"Fuck, sorry," you said in a groggy voice, laughing. He instantly wrapped around you tightly, his mind not totally awake. As he squeezed you tight you let out a squeak, not expecting it. Neither of you realized Seonghwa was right there.

"So I'm guessing you're both okay?" Seonghwa said, and your brain finally registered it. You looked up at him in shock, feeling suddenly exposed. You nodded, trying not to be awkward. What did it matter really, that Yunho was sleeping in the same bed as you?

"I'm feeling better," you replied. "Got a lot of sleep."

"Sure," Seonghwa chuckled, looking between the two of you.

"Hwa! Go away!" you retorted, playfully rolling your eyes at him. Yunho remained uncharacteristically quiet behind you, but his arms didn't leave you for a second.

"Okay I will. Just glad you're alive," he chuckled again, making his way out of the room.

You shoved your face in your pillow, pushing yourself back further into Yunho's embrace.

You definitely had some explaining to do.

[fallenneziah]

How they act with a passenger princess reader.

Optimus, Ratchet, Bulkhead, Bumblebee (no Arcee because she has no passenger seat) /Megatron, Knockout, shockwave, Starscream (Except Soundwave because unfortunately you would not fit)

Cw: Slight spicy talk? Suggestive? (Barely) I know I didn't get all the characters. This came to me like an hour ago and my dumbass fingers make it hard to type so I apologize.

Optimus doesn't at all mind. So long as his interior stays clean and you're not laying on his horn every five minutes, he hasn't run into any troubles with you in his cabin. He rather enjoys when you relax and kick your feet up on the dash, getting all comfy.

"Are you comfortable?" He'd ask while his tires rumble down the road. You melt into the heated seat and glide your hand over the dividing dash between yourself and the driver's seat. "Couldn't be comfier, Prime."

This makes Optimus incredibly happy. He enjoys knowing you like to relax in his cabin. He enjoys knowing you'd rather sit back and let him take full reign. Not like he wouldn't have it anyway.

Occasionally he'd even treat you. "You may eat, but refrain from getting anything in my flooring. It's... Uncomfortable."

Oh happy little you, that little smile while you eagerly shoved fries in his mouth while careful of his dash and other sensitive areas which you wouldn't desire fast food residue to reside.

And what's a little teasing? Without an eye on the wheel or the instincts to boot, you could easily mess around with him. Whether it's a hand placed firmly on a well oriented joystick or brushing over the fans of his dash. All the little ways that made the cabin rumble and shake briefly.

So silent, but ever so telling. He enjoys his little passenger princess. His only passenger princess.

You're wrong to assume you have any other choice but to be a passenger princess. Ratchet doesn't let anybody sit in the driver's seat. No grimy human hands on his steering wheel.

He forbids any fast food in his cabin, even if he feels like treating you. The most he's ever let you get away with was your water bottle or a well concealed smoothie.

He constantly is reminding you not to mess with the buttons inside the ambulance. And you always tease him, rubbing your foot against the underside of the glove compartment. "Aw, what's wrong doc, a girl can't have a little fun??"

He'd huff, warm air flaring out of his vents across the span of the cabin. "You'd do well to sit back and be quiet. We're almost there."

You'd pout, curling up in the cabin. "Ratchet..." Dragging your finger along the divider of the two seats. Ratchet would remain quiet, although the brief flare in the rumble of his engine spoke volumes. Damn you little human.

"Just sit still. All I ask."

"Yes sir, doctor."

He will never admit the amount of hot air that briefly left his fans. The rest of the drive he kept the heated seat on for you, making sure to ease you into sitting still for him while he brought you home.

Does the occasional fry or sauce packet get lost in his cabin and joints? Yep. Does he care? Nah! Eat as much as you want in his cabin and he won't stop you. As long as you're having fun.

The only thing he's slightly sensitive about is the radio. Once you're besties though he has no problem with you curling up your feet and taking over the tunes.

He'd be lying if he didn't enjoy the little wiggle you did in the seat when a good song came on. He'd remember it. He'd remember the way you moved to each song. It's something he can't help but notice.

He'd always beep quietly, almost a drawn out sigh he couldn't help when he heard you sing along without a care to watch the road, knowing he had the wheels. (Literally)

He would sometimes beep along and enjoy the way it encouraged you. Your hand gliding over his glove compartment and made his spark throb and pound. His enjoy roaring against the road in delight to be spending such time with you.

"Having fun 'Bee??" You smiled softly, hearing him chirp and whir back. "Yeah, I am too."

He is always willing to kill time on the road for you. For... One reason or another. That isn't important, his only desire is to be out there with you.

He literally drives Miko to and from all over Nevada. I don't think he's the least bit worried about you.

But unlike how Miko sits in the back.. you sit in the front. It feels so, in a way, intimate. You're in his dash, you're in his space. You recline the seat and relax knowing you're surrounded by a thick metal powerhouse.

Your hand wanders the dash or the seat. Sometimes spending extra time fiddling with the little nodes of his around you like the window or the throttle stick.

It grinds his gears in the best way. You're constantly laying it on thick with the praise for some reason, and Bulkhead isn't in the season to change that.

"You wanting something to eat?"

"Whatever you say goes, big guy." You pat the dash with an extra roughness than usual, making him tense a little. "Right... Right."

You know he likes it. He likes having you so close, feeling you so close to him. And in a way, that's your seat. He's sold in his mind, you belong there. Take your seat princess, it's all yours.

Now, technically your first time as his passenger princess you happened to be duct taped but who's really counting right?? You didn't feel very princess in the moment. Unfortunately, despite their intimidation tactics you've made yourself right at home now.

I'm assuming his cabin may have 2 seats. He doesn't let you sit in the front. One because he gets that seat and two because you don't get to see the view because fuck you.

He would rather you be a comfortable and safe princess than a dead one. Because what's a dead human to him, right? Pretty fucking useless.

Just.. don't mess with the buttons. Oh Primus don't mess with the buttons.

"Hey Megs?"

"What??" He grumbled, annoyed with answering all your idiotic questions. "What's this for?" You brushed your fingers over the switch, feeling his jets almost stop working. "Do not touch. Hands to yourself."

You pouted, slumping back in his seat. "I don't like flying... There's nothing to do."

Megatron grumbled in annoyance. Of all the little fleshies he had to deal with, Primus had to give him this one. Granted there's probably worse. "Hands to yourself, touch anything more and I'll cut your little hand off."

"Sounds like someone's sensitive~" You smirk. It grinds Megatron's gears, but alas, you aren't wrong... And for some odd, blasted reason, he doesn't mind. Do whatever you damn well please, really.

Don't scratch the interior and get comfortable for the ride princess. He thinks he's coined the term but really he's just a good 'con turned 'bot that loves to show the human some style.

Get your feet off his dash. Like now. No more.

He will let you do whatever you want but do not muck up, mess up or any other 'up' in his cabin. He will gut you and then throw you in the sewer. But that's only after a few warnings... Right??

"Knockout... I gotta stretch, we've been driving for hours." You huff and whine, the cramped little car getting to you.

"Alright alright, let me pull over." He would sigh, feeling how you tense up and stretch in the chair as best you could. Until you make it to the side of the road and you can get out and stretch.

"Being a princess is so hard, isn't it, love?" He teases you in mock concern.

"Sorry I have muscles, unlike you big boy." He huffed when you kicked his tire, and then went rather quiet the rest of the drive.

Big tank! Big tank! Big tank!!

You are the luckiest, even if Shockwave doesn't reciprocate your feelings.

"Illogical..." He'd grumbled as you relaxed inside the nice space. Kicking your legs up and leaning back, knowing you're in a fortified Decepticon bunker. Nothing can get you in here, no sir.

"So Shockwave, what's it like being absolutely massive??" You asked, patting the side of the interior.

Shockwave would only huff. "Do not move from your seat."

"We've got a long way to go and this thing isn't exactly F1... So, wanna talk about Cybertron?"

"No. Be quiet. You are comfortable, that is enough for humans to shut up."

"Who told you that? I could get bored?"

Shockwave is quiet. Granted those humans he experimented on may have only been loud because they were uncomfortable... And being experimented on.

"Nevermind. Sit down, and be quiet."

"Fine... Whatever you say, chief."

You'd honestly rather fly with Megatron. Or hanging onto Soundwaves fins as you flap in the wind at full speed. He's so bitchy. He only ever wants to talk about Megatron. He doesn't care that you sit in his front seat, just don't touch anything and sit still.

You'd listen to him ramble on and on like you're besties. You'd slump back, definitely not taking a well deserved nap as he trauma dumps his entire Cybertronian life onto your little innocent ears.

"Very interesting Starscream..." You mutter, dragging your finger along the dash panels. That makes him stop. "What are you doing??"

"What? I'm listening." Am not.

"No. Stop that. Put your arms down."

You huff, feeling the throttle of his jets increase, so you continue the motion. "I don't think I will. After all... I am the passenger."

[eris-snow]

𝐁𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐠𝐨𝐮 𝐈𝐬 𝐆𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐒𝐨𝐟𝐭

Tags: bakugou x gn!reader, todoroki shennigans, fluff, sweet, funny, humour, swearing

Todoroki conducts a highly scientific experiment and has come to prove that his highly scientific hypothesis is indeed correct.

Bakugou's going soft. Prove me wrong.

I mean, if you look at it with blinders, it's hard to see where he's coming from, but Todoroki can assure you that this is not just a theory anymore.

Can science explain how Bakugou's features simply melt when you kiss him? Can math explain how unexplainable his actions are towards you without the expression called love?

Shoto doesn't think the universe can explain a soft Bakugou. And that's why he's here to explain it for you-

"Todoroki, was it necessary to draw the blinds-."

"Yes."

Bakugou loves you to bits. Whether it's buying your favourite food back or loving little gestures, whether it's prioritising your safety even when on the battlefield...Bakugou's rough edges are slowly but sure smoothening out.

Not for everyone, of course, as Shoto has deduced. He still gets on the blond's bad sides and for some reason, he refuses to be called bestie, but hey, at least there's no punch to the face anymore.

Bakugou makes sure to walk on the outer side of the pavement. He makes sure to kiss you good night and whenever it's raining, he holds the umbrella for you so you can walk hands-free.

When you're sick, he goes all cabin fever and cooks for you. He checks your temperature and if you're feeling up to it, he'll explain the homework to you and show you your next few assignments.

He calls you Sunshine, which is so soft and nice compared to his other nicknames such as:

"ICYHOT, DID YOU MIX MY SHIRT WITH YOURS? MY SHIRT IS PINK NOW YOU HALF-BRAINED, TWO-QUIRKED PEPPERMINT BITCH-"

(Oh shit-)

There are stars in his eyes whenever he looks at you, and Shoto bets his father's black card that your boyfriend is already saving up for a ring, one as special and unique as you because you do way too much for the lovesick idiot.

You apologise for him.

You put up with him. (Mad respect.)

Everyone acts like being with Bakugou is such a dream, but being his partner is not easy.

Flaws that take time to be corrected are the separation marks for most couples, and the fact that you stayed by his side to build him up from his fucked-up asshole self takes more mental strength than any superficial fan could imagine.

Is Bakugou going soft? Absolutely.

"That brings me to the end of my presentation." Shoto bows, facing his class.

There are way too many crinkles on Aizawa's forehead. "The presentation was supposed to be on the latest news in the Hero community." His teacher says flatly. "Not another collection to your conspiracy theory folder."

Shoto is about to respond, before Bakugou speaks up first.

"YOU THINK I'M GOING SOFT—?"

[justagalwhowrites]

I saw this video and I feel like something like this would be fun to read! I have to ask would you ever consider writing a kidnapper!Joel fic?

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8Dfp6Na/

Hi Bestie!

So.... Yes :)

Not quite the vibe of the linked video but I hope you enjoy it!

Run Rabbit: Part One

It was just over a year after the world ended that you were captured by Joel and Tommy Miller. They're harsh, they're cold and they're killers. But, as a nurse, you're a valuable person to have around and they're not the worst thing wandering the wasteland that was the United States. And there might be more to these men than meets the eye.

PLEASE READ ALL WARNINGS. Written as part of the @romana-after-dark Dead Dove December event (but posted late because it's impossible for me to make a deadline at the moment apparently.) This will be in two parts.

Relationship: Joel Miller x Female Reader X Tommy Miller

Warnings WHOLE FIC: DUBCON (reader is a captive, participation might be enthusiastic but consent is dubious under the circumstances.) Raider!Joel; Raider!Tommy; Captive reader; Canon-typical violence; graphic depictions of violence; graphic depictions of injury; attempted SA (not by Joel or Tommy); Dom/Sub dynamic but not an established relationship; Dom-ish Joel; Brat tamer-ish Joel; Sub-ish reader; DDDNE; M/F/M threesome; unprotected P in V sex; Anal sex; Oral sex; No use of Y/N; Minors DNI 18+ Only

Length: 8k

PLEASE NOTE: part one does not get smutty ❤️

Part 2

November, 2004

“You can have whatever you want, please!” 

Your hand was clamped over your mouth as you tried to keep quiet from your place below the floorboards. Your boyfriend, Zach, had tucked you into the crawl space when he ran in from hunting with three men on his tail. 

“They don’t know about you,” he’d said, breathless. “Stay quiet, I’ll get us out of this.” 

But even a year into the apocalypse, Zach wasn’t a great shot. It wasn’t long before he was out matched and the men were breaking down the door to the cabin you’d been holed up in for a few days. 

“Seemed awful keen to protect whatever it is you got,” one of the men said. “How do we know you’re not gonna just come and try to take it back?” 

“Should just kill ‘em,” another man said. “Don’t gotta worry about it then.” 

“No, no, I swear I won’t,” Zach pleaded. 

“Prove it,” the final man spoke for the first time. “Got no reason to trust you now, why should we leave you alive?”

You kept your hands tight over your mouth, trying not to cry, trying to stay quiet, hoping they’d leave Zach alive. 

“Because I have something better than supplies!” He yelled it, his words flowing together as he stumbled over them. 

“Like?” The third man said. 

“My girlfriend,” Zach panted. Your breath caught. “She was a nurse before, in an ER, she can keep you alive, you can have her, please…” 

“And where is this girlfriend?” The first man said. “You seem awful alone here…” 

You hoped Zach was just buying time, that he wouldn’t actually tell these animals where you were. 

You were wrong. 

“In the closet,” he said. “There’s a crawl space there, I told her to hide there while I took care of things here. Please, she’s worth a lot, she’s good at patching you up, she’s real pretty, you can have her, you can have her…” 

The sound of his begging almost covered the thud of boots as you heard the closet door creak open and the floor over your head disappeared. 

“Well, would you look at that,” a large man with shaggy curls and a patchy beard - the first one who has spoken, you thought - smirked down at you. “He’s not full of shit.”

“No,” you shook your head, eyes wide. “No, please…” 

The man ignored you, grabbing a fistful of fabric at your chest and hefting you up from the crawl space with a grunt. He dropped you on the ground and you tried to scramble away only to have another man grab your shoulder and throw you down. You landed on your backside, a different tall, broad man with dark curls looming over you. 

“Where you think you’re running to, little rabbit?” He smirked, the second man who had spoken. You pulled yourself back from him, looking for a way out. The third man, blond and pale and the youngest of them, stood over Zach, a gun pointed at his head. He started humming Run, Rabbit, Run as he smiled at your boyfriend, glancing your way, prowling toward Zach. A predator enjoying his prey. 

“So,” the first man dropped your pack that had been in the crawl space next to you at your side with a thud, making you jump. “You really a nurse?” 

“She is,” Zach answered for you. “She is and you can have her, please…” 

“Zach!” Tears tightened your throat. 

“I’m sorry, honey,” he said, not looking at you. “I’m sorry, but I can’t…” 

The man who pulled you from the crawl space sighed, pulling a handgun from his side, going up behind Zach and pressing the barrel to his head before pulling the trigger. Your scream hung in the air longer than the crack of the gun, the salty, metallic taste of Zach’s blood on your tongue as his body slumped to the ground. 

“Hey,” the man who shot Zach dropped to one knee in front of you, grabbing your face roughly, gripping your cheeks in his large hand. There was blood on him, too. “You really think that piece of shit is worth screamin’ and cryin’ over? He was sellin’ you, girl, he ain’t worth any grief of yours.” 

He released you and looked over his shoulder to the other dark haired man. 

“Tommy, got something we can hold her with?” The other man - Tommy, apparently - started going through his bag. He looked toward the blond next. “Vince, gather what you can, we’re heading out in 10. Made a lot of noise here, don’t want to wait and find out what that attracts.” 

“Are you going to kill me too?” You asked quietly. 

The man who seemed to be in charge cocked his head at you. 

“Now why would we go and do a thing like that?” He asked. “Your boyfriend might have been scum but he was right, you’re valuable cargo. You’re gonna be a good girl for us, right?” 

You weren’t really sure what to say to that, your heart beating so hard and fast you were sure this man could see your pulse in your throat. 

“Don’t really matter either way, does it?” He said as Tommy handed him some rope. “You either cooperate or you’re more trouble than you’re worth and we just kill you. Don’t make much difference to us. Hands out, wrists together.” 

You just looked at him and he sighed, pulling his sidearm out again and putting it below your chin. The muzzle was warm and wet from where he’d just killed Zach and, for a moment, you thought you were going to vomit. 

“Didn’t I just say I’d kill you if you got to be more trouble than you’re worth?” He said. “You’re already a lot of trouble by bein’ and extra mouth to feed so I recommend cooperating before my temper runs out. So. Hands out, wrists together.” 

You obeyed and the man wrapped your wrists in rope tight enough that you had no hope of wriggling out but not so tight that it was painful, just uncomfortable. He wrapped his large hand around the cluster of rope between your wrists and yanked you to your feet. 

“Got anything on you I should be worried about?” He asked. “Be a lot easier on you if you tell me now than later.” 

“Knife,” you said, voice shaky. “Right pocket.” 

“Good girl.” 

He reached into your pocket and pulled the weapon free, opening and examining the blade. 

“Know how to use this?” He asked, brows raised. 

“I’ve used it,” you replied. He nodded and closed it, putting it in his pocket. 

“Be a good enough girl for a long enough time and maybe you can get it back,” he said before turning to Tommy. “I’m gettin’ a head start with this one, heading north west, back to site. You know the way.” 

“I know it,” he said. “We’ll clear out quick, catch up soon.” 

The man who had you grabbed your pack from the floor and slung it over his shoulder before bringing his rifle around to his front, nudging you forward with the muzzle. 

“Let’s go,” he said. “Try and take off and I’ll shoot ya. And I don’t miss.” 

The man kept close to you, nudging you along in front of him and you tried not to trip on roots and overgrown brush but you’d only been walking about 20 minutes when you failed, falling with a pained grunt. The man sighed and grabbed you by the collar, pulling you to your feet. 

“You OK?” He asked, gun pointed at the ground and not at you. 

“Yes,” you said, even though your hands were scraped up and your knees hurt and you had your boyfriend’s blood on your skin and your throat hurt from screaming.

“Keep movin’,” he ordered. 

You kept looking back over your shoulder at him. He reminded you of a guy you dated once who was in the army. He never looked in one place too long, head constantly turning, looking, searching. There were threats, he knew that. He also knew how to see them coming. The gun was tilted toward the ground but close and ready. You were waiting for him to change his mind about you, to shoot you, too. Part of you wondered if this was part of a game for him, if he was going to walk with you just long enough to lull you into a false sense of security before shooting you. Maybe he liked the fear, the surprise. Maybe he’d given too much away by killing Zach and now he couldn’t get what he wanted from you. 

Maybe that was better than the alternative.

You were only walking about an hour when the other men, Tommy and Vince, caught up to you. The man you were with turned and pointed the gun, noticing their approach before you did. You froze, only realizing that it was probably a good time to run now that his attention was elsewhere once it was too late. 

“Just us, Joel,” Tommy called as they climbed up the hill you’d just made it up yourselves. “No trouble behind us.” 

The man - Joel, apparently - lowered the rifle and the men joined you. They had four packs between the two of them, two you didn’t recognize and two backpacking bags that you recognized as yours and Zach’s. Your stomach turned. 

“Not a terrible haul,” Tommy said. “These two had decent gear and must have just taken somethin’ good. A lot of jerky, good stock of ammo, some medical shit.” 

Joel looked down at you, his eyebrows raised. 

“You know how to use the shit in those bags?” He asked. You just looked back at him. He sighed and grabbed a fist full of your hair, jerking you close to him, making you squeak in shock. “Don’t play dumb, girl, you know how to use that shit?” 

“No,” you said sarcastically, not sure where the guts for that came from. “I enjoy hauling around shit I can’t do anything with.” 

Joel’s jaw tensed and you weren’t sure if he was about to yell or laugh. 

“Not gonna get far with an attitude like that, little rabbit,” Tommy said, but he was smirking a little. “Lot better for you if you just answer the questions when we ask ‘em.” 

You looked between the two men closest to you for a moment. You wondered if they were related. Their eyes were the same, same hair, too. They would have been handsome in another context, one where you weren’t afraid they were about to kill you. 

“It’s mine,” you said after a moment. “We were backpacking when the outbreak happened, we didn’t even know for a day or two, we were in the middle of the mountains and there weren’t other people around. I know how to use it all.” 

Joel released you. 

“Good to know you ain’t completely useless,” he said. 

“You mean outside the fact that I can save your life?” You bit out. Again, you weren’t sure why. 

He snorted. 

“Outside of that. Keep movin’.” 

With the other men there, Tommy took the lead and you followed, Vince and Joel behind you. You could feel Vince’s eyes on you, the cold, lecherous feeling of his gaze making your stomach churn. 

Night was starting to fall by the time you reached a cabin that showed greater signs of people than you’d seen in what felt like forever. There was a stack of wood on the front porch, a line between the house and a tree that looked like it was meant for drying clothes, barrels placed to gather rain water. You stopped, staring at the small structure. 

“Inside,” Joel said after a moment. 

“I have to pee.” 

He sighed. 

“Vince,” he said. “Take her to piss. Don’t fuckin’ touch her unless she tries to run, got it?” 

Vince groaned but nudged you off to the side of the house with the muzzle of his gun. You looked around, trying to get a lay of the land, see what a good route out might be. There was a small path that looked like it would take you deeper into the woods, eventually up into the Smokies. That was fine. If you could get your pack, you could survive out there for at least a week or two on your own, maybe find a settlement or something. You’d never had to survive on your own, you’d never hunted or shot a human being. Zach had handled that. You weren’t sure how long you could really make it on your own but you’d rather give that a shot than leave yourself to whatever these men had in store for you. 

“Here’s good,” Vince said after two minutes of walking. You held out your wrists and he raised his eyebrows. “You think I’m a fucking idiot?” 

“I can’t really pull my pants down like this,” you said. “I’m not a man, I can’t just whip my dick out…” 

He stomped over to you and unbutton and unzipped your jeans before yanking them down to your knees, ignoring your surprised sound before going back to your hips. His fingers trailed over your skin, sinking into the meat of your ass and making your stomach churn, before he pulled your panties down, too. You could feel his eyes on you, lingering on you, before he stood up. 

“There,” he said. “Happy?” 

He walked a few steps away and turned back to look at you. 

“I can’t go with you watching.” 

He shrugged. 

“Not my problem. You have to go bad enough, you’ll go.” 

You glared at him and held his gaze before squatting and peeing, missing toilet paper and privacy more than you had since the damn outbreak started. You straightened up when you were done and stood there, still looking at him. 

“Afraid you’ll have to come pull up my pants, too,” you said. “Since your boss apparently wants you to wait on me hand and foot.” 

A muscle in the man’s neck twitched but he stalked over and yanked your clothes back up, harshly buttoning and zipping your jeans before shoving you back toward the cabin hard enough that you stumbled. 

Inside, Joel and Tommy were sitting at a rustic table, a fire going in the nearby fireplace. There were two Nalgene bottles of water on the table and a bag of jerky between them. The jerky you recognized. You and Zach had made it just a few days earlier. 

You tried not to think about it. 

“He behave himself?” Joel asked, stretched out with his legs far in front of him. 

“You’re really gonna take this little cunt’s word over mine?” Vince asked. 

Joel just kept looking at you, ignoring him entirely. 

“Asked you a question girl,” he said. “He keep his hands to himself?” 

You glanced at Vince who was staring down Joel, his blue eyes hot and angry. You looked back to Joel. 

“He was fine,” you said. 

“Good,” Joel said, getting up, grabbing a bottle of water and going over to you. He put one of his huge hands on your shoulder, guiding you to the nearby couch and nudging you down onto it. 

You obeyed his unspoken command, lowering yourself slowly down but not relaxing into the cushion, staying on the edge of it. 

“Open,” he ordered. 

Your eyes narrowed. He glared back. 

“Open your mouth,” he said when you didn’t obey. 

“You put your dick in my mouth I’ll bite it clean off.”

Joel squared his jaw and held up the bottle of water. 

“Don’t got a smaller bottle right now and you can’t hold this with your hands tied. Don’t want you droppin’ dead from dehydration after we went through all the trouble to get you here so open your goddamn mouth.” 

You ground your teeth for a moment before you obeyed. He unscrewed the top and poured the water on your tongue, crisp and cool and making you aware of just how thirsty you’d become in the few hours you’d been with him. 

“Good girl,” he said. “Was that so hard?” 

Eventually, he stopped and you closed your mouth, wiping your lips on the back of your tied hands as he closed the bottle. 

“Don’t gotta worry about that shit from us,” he said. “Prefer when a woman begs for it, not about to take it from one who ain’t.” 

“Because I can trust what a group of murderers says,” you snapped. 

“Murderers,” Joel shrugged. “Not rapists. Hungry?” 

“Why?” You asked, tongue still sharp. “Going to be kind enough to give me scraps of the food you stole from me?” 

“Something like that,” Joel said. “If you’re gonna try to starve yourself to death, just let me know. Save you the trouble and put you down quick instead.” 

You watched him for a moment. For some reason, you trusted what he was saying to you. That he wasn’t going to hurt you - at least, not like that. That he was intending to keep you alive. 

“Not hungry,” you said eventually. 

Joel shrugged. 

“If you change your mind.” 

You sat on the edge of the couch cushion as the men took inventory of what they stole from you, what they killed Zach to take. You tried not to cry. 

It’s not like you’d been especially close to Zach when the outbreak happened. You hadn’t said “I love you” yet, you’d been dating for a month and a half and fucking for just a few weeks of that. 

The backpacking trip had been a spur of the moment thing for both of you. You had some vacation time to burn before the end of the quarter, his job was flexible and you’d bonded over a shared love of the outdoors. You’d ignored the words of caution from your girlfriends when he wanted to take you hiking for a second date, the two of you ending up exhausted but proud as you came to the end of the seven mile trail he’d selected. He kissed you there for the first time, his lips salty with trail mix and sweat and a view of a valley swelling with shades of green spread out below you. 

You were somewhere in the mountains when the world collapsed. You didn’t even know it had happened until you returned to where you’d parked your car to find the windows smashed and the inside looted, a body missing a chunk of its skull not far away. You’d ran to it on instinct, dropping to your knees beside them to check their pulse even though it was clear that there was no way they would be alive. Their skin was cold and there were fibrous, vine-like tendrils swarming in their brain. 

It had been you and Zach from there. He was more of a survivalist than you. He knew how to hunt and trap, taught you how to skin a rabbit and process a deer. You weren’t sure if you’d truly come to love him or not, if the feeling you had for him was just what happened when you went about surviving the end of the world with another person and became dependent on them for your very life. 

But you were certain that he hadn’t loved you. Not really. If he had, he never would have given you over to these men. 

You’d never have done that to him.

Maybe you did love him. You weren’t sure you’d ever know. 

“Sleep here,” Joel ordered as the day fully shifted to night and Tommy and Vince started readying for bed. “I’m keepin’ watch for now. We were gone long enough, some dumbasses might think they can move in. Don’t try anything.” 

He went onto the porch and you stretched out on the couch, the other men going into what you expected were bedrooms at the back of the cabin. Your hands were still bound. You stared at the dying embers of the fire, the orange glow, and cried. 

***

Joel needed Vince to stop acting like a shit head. 

The man didn’t seem to understand the position he was in. He was the least valuable person here. He was young, he was dumb and he was disposable. 

He just didn’t seem to realize it. If he kept looking at you like you were something he could take, he’d find out just how disposable he was.

Joel came in from his watch about 5 a.m. to find you whimpering quietly on the couch. He sighed. 

“You really still crying over that jackass you were with?” He asked as you sniffled quietly. 

“Shut up,” your voice was thick and wet. 

“He ain’t worth it,” he said gently, sitting in the armchair that was near where your head was. He wasn’t sure why he was bothering. But then, he’d never really taken a captive before. He usually just killed people or turned them loose. You were valuable enough to keep and sending you out into the wilderness alone seemed crueler than holding onto you. He just had no idea what the fuck he was supposed to do with you now. “He didn’t know who the fuck we were or what the fuck we’d do with you - lot worse out there than us, little girl - and he handed you over on a silver fuckin’ platter. More than happy to trade your pain for his sorry life.” 

“He’s the only person left that I knew,” you said softly. It was the first truly genuine thing Joel had heard you say. Except, maybe, when you asked if he was going to kill you. “I’m alone now.” 

“Not alone, little girl,” he said. He wasn’t sure why he was reassuring you. He shouldn’t care. “You’re better off.” 

“Why do you call me that?” You asked, lifting your head ever so slightly from the arm of the couch to look at him. “I’m not a little girl…” 

“Little compared to me,” he said. 

You scoffed and sniffed at the same time. 

“You’re a giant,” you said. “Everyone is little compared to you. Don’t see you calling Vinny there little boy…” 

Joel laughed a bit. 

“Maybe I should. And you’re a girl.” 

“I’m a woman,” you said, a spark of defiance in your tone. “I don’t think I’m much younger than you, if I am at all.” 

Joel frowned a bit at that. 

“How old are you?” He asked after a moment. 

You thought for a second, like you were doing the math. Which was fair. It’s not like he’d celebrated his last birthday, either, his stomach twisting at the thought. He had to think about it, too. 

“I’m 33,” you said. “How old are you?” 

He was surprised. Not that you looked terribly young, now that he thought about it. More that human faces lacked much definition to him anymore. Anyone older than a teenager looked about the same until they started going gray. You just seemed younger. 

“I’m 37,” he said. 

“Yeah, I’m not a girl,” you said, putting your head back down. 

“You could tell me your name,” he said. 

You scoffed. 

“Then I’m not sure what I’m supposed to call you, little girl,” he said. He could feel you glare at him. 

“I had a whole life before,” you said quietly, more to yourself than to Joel. “I had a house and a job and friends and I used to go to dinner and to concerts and buy the people I loved presents. I had a life before.” 

He realized then why he’d thought you were younger. You were, possibly, the most human person he’d come across in a year. Some small spark of divine mortality - the juxtaposition of life and a kind of death that was still possible - there in your eyes that didn’t exist in others. It seemed naive, in a way. Made you seem younger than you were. But he wasn’t sure that was it. Maybe you weren’t naive. Maybe part of you was just clinging to your humanity harder than anyone else left. 

“We all did,” he said, voice harsher than he’d really meant it to be. There was part of him that wanted to snap that tie in you. It was unfair that you got to keep it when he didn’t. But it was a kindness, too. You’d survive better without it. “You move on. Go to sleep.” 

He went to the room he shared with Tommy who was unconscious, sprawled out on the bed and snoring. Joel took the sleeping bag on the floor and stared at the ceiling, trying to make himself not listen for the sound of you crying in the next room. 

Things were surprisingly smooth with you for the next two days. Vince was a fucking idiot and got a nasty cut on his arm that you tended to, giving him stitches while he leered at you and Joel ground his teeth. 

He felt better with you tied. Your wrists, at the very least, but during the day when the men were coming and going, Joel bound you to a chair at the table. 

“Comfortable?” He asked the first time he did it. 

“No,” you spat, face scrunched in anger that was so fierce it was almost cute. If Joel even found things cute anymore. “I’m not.” 

“You gonna lose a hand from me cuttin’ off your circulation?” He asked instead. You just glared at him. “Good. Stay put, like a good girl.” 

“I hate you,” you seethed at him. 

Joel shrugged. 

“That’s fine,” he said. “Don’t gotta like me to keep me alive, do ya?” 

He went outside to gather wood. 

By the third night, you were yawning and looked barely conscious before the sun had even set. Joel frowned. 

“I keep telling you to sleep,” he said. “You ignoring me for fun or you think exhausting yourself is good for your health?” 

“I’d love to sleep,” you snapped. “But something about having my wrists bound keeps me up at night. Maybe it’s the discomfort, maybe it’s the looming threat of death, who can say?” 

Joel pulled Tommy and Vince aside after dinner, the men standing in the dirt outside the cabin, snow starting to drift down. 

“She hasn’t tried to hurt anyone yet,” Tommy shrugged. “Don’t think she’s gonna go far if she gets away and doesn’t seem like the kind to kill us in our sleep.” 

“Don’t like it,” Vince said, glaring at the cabin for a moment before looking back at Joel. “Can’t trust her as far as we can throw her…” 

“No one said shit about trust,” Joel cut him off. “But we can’t keep ‘er tied up forever.” 

“Fine,” Vince shrugged. “We can put her to use then kill her. Won’t need to tie her up then.” 

Joel could hear the blood in his ears. 

“Suggest that one more time, little boy, and see how long you last,” he straightened up as he said it, the full six inches he had on the younger man all the more apparent then. “You want to do that kind of shit, find someone else to run with.” 

“Fuck, sorry,” he raised his arms in a moment of surrender before crossing them again. “Just don’t come crying to me when she slits your fucking throat.” 

“Can’t cry if she kills me, can I?” Joel said, stomping back toward the house, pushing past Vince on the way. 

You were still bound to the chair. He wordlessly unwound the rope and you relaxed your elbows, stretching your arms as best you could with your wrists still tied. 

“Hands up,” he said. You frowned, just looking at him. “You heard me, you want me to untie you or not? Hands up.” 

You practically flung your wrists at him and he tried not to laugh at you as he loosened the knot and pulled the rope from your wrists. 

The second you were free, you rolled your shoulders and closed your eyes, groaning at the feeling of it. 

“God that’s good,” you moaned before you started flexing your fingers and rotating your wrists before you glared up at him again. “What? You try being tied up for days, see how you deal with it.” 

“Rather not,” Joel said, winding up the rope. “Better be a good girl, don’t try anything stupid.” 

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” you said as you spread your arms wide and sighed. Joel found himself smiling a little for the first time in he didn’t know how long. He stopped himself. 

“Actually get some sleep,” he said, voice gruff. “No good to us exhausted.” 

He left you alone, taking the bed in he and Tommy’s room that night and Tommy taking the floor. It took effort to not listen for you moving in the front room as he drifted off. 

He wasn’t sure how long he was asleep when Tommy shook him awake. 

“Joel,” he said urgently. “She’s gone.” 

***

Absolutely none of this was ideal. 

You were exhausted, the only thing keeping you upright the adrenaline that ran through your whole body. You didn’t have supplies, your pack and all its valuable contents in the bedrooms of the men. You were stuck running through snow, leaving a clear path to follow until the woods got dense enough that the snow hadn’t piled up much. 

But you had to go, you had to go now, now, now, right now. You couldn’t spend another night there like that, not when you had the option to get away, not when you had the use of your arms back. 

Your body wouldn’t let you sleep, even for an hour or two, even just for a night to try to make a break for it tomorrow. The second Joel had freed your hands it was like you could feel every part of your body in sharp, acute detail. Every frayed nerve, every thrumming vein, every peaked hair was stark and clear. You couldn’t relax enough to sleep. You had an opening, a chance. You had to take it, you had to. 

You didn’t even have your knife. 

But you had your body and you knew how to push yourself over long distances in the mountains. You’d been good at it before, too. You’d hiked most of your life, knowing how to get yourself to make it to the top of the next ridge even when your calves were burning and your lungs felt on the verge of collapse you knew you could make it. 

All you had to do was do that now, through all the exhaustion and all the panic, and put as much distance between yourself and those men as possible. 

You’d find some way to keep yourself alive eventually. There’d be supplies or a settlement. Something. You were sure of that. 

Mostly. 

Your breath rose in a cloud in front of you and you broke away from the trail into the brush of the woods, thankful that the moon was bright enough that you could have some sense of where you were going. 

You were just starting to relax a little when you heard it behind you. A sharp, shrill whistle. You froze. 

“Come on out, little rabbit,” Tommy called. “Not gonna hurt you…” 

“Shit,” you whispered as you panted for breath. They sounded pretty far away but they’d catch up eventually. 

You scrambled through the forest until you reached a cluster of ferns that was thick and full and you ducked into it. If you stayed quiet and still, they’d walk right past you. You could stay put for a while and then find your way from there. Simple. 

You tried to not shake from cold and fear as you heard the signs of the men getting close. There was the crunch of sticks, the rustle of leaves and the eerie sound of Vince humming Run, Rabbit, Run. The glare of a flashlight trickled between the ferns and you held your breath, the humming getting louder. 

For a second, a glorious second, you thought you were in the clear. Vince had passed your hiding spot, poking through the brush closest to the trail with his rifle but you were just far enough off the trail that he missed you, and you relaxed. 

Then you heard the snap of a twig. 

“Found you.” 

You spun, Vince turning the flashlight on and shining it in your face, all but blinding you. You threw up a hand instinctively to protect your eyes and he grabbed your wrist, yanking you out of your hiding spot and almost pulling your arm out of its socket in the process. 

You yelped in pain, you couldn’t help it, and he all but threw you onto the trail. Your eyes were still adjusting to the light but it took you a moment to realize that he had his gun trained on you. 

“Knew you’d take off on us,” he said, panting a little. You put your hands up and looked for a way out. “Knew you’d be more trouble than you’re worth…” 

You backed away from him, more on instinct than anything else, not able to watch where you were going and you shrieked as you tripped and fell back, landing hard and barely catching yourself before your head smacked into the rock of the path. You rose up on your hands quickly, scrambling back from him as best you could but he was standing, could see where he was going. You didn’t have a hope. 

“Please,” you whispered. “Please just… just let me go, you already have my supplies and…” 

“Can’t let you go with you knowing where we are,” he replied. “And you were already more trouble than you’re worth in my opinion…” 

“I stitched up your arm,” you said, tears stinging at your eyes. “I helped you…” 

“And those two idiots won’t even let me fuck you,” he cut you off. “What good is pussy you can’t fuck, hm?” 

“Please,” you said again. 

“That’s not an answer,” he prowled closer, the muzzle of his rifle so close you could almost touch it. Your heart was in your throat. “Think I’ll just kill you, bet that pretty head of yours would make all kinds of nice colors when I blow it off…” 

“Hey!” Tommy snapped, his gun up and pointed at Vince. “Know you’re not threatenin’ to kill her, not when we all agreed to keep her alive.” 

“You agreed,” Vince snapped. “You and your asshole brother, not me.” 

“That asshole has been keepin’ your sorry ass alive,” Joel growled from behind you. Your head whipped around to see him there, looming large over you. His gun was up, too, pointed at Vince. “You need us a whole hell of a lot more than we need you. You can do what I fuckin’ say or you can move on. But you keep pointing that gun at her and you ain’t gonna have much to move on with.” 

The three of them stood there for a moment, Vince aiming at you, Joel and Tommy aiming at him. Your heart felt like it was going to break your ribs it was beating so hard. 

Vince lowered his gun. Tommy did the same but Joel left his up. 

“Joel,” Vince said but Joel cut him off. 

“Don’t like men who don’t listen,” he said. “Not worth shit to me if you can’t take orders. Said you could join me and my brother if you did what you were told.” 

“I told you she’d run!” Vince snapped. 

“Don’t give a shit,” Joel said. “You think nurses pop up every five fuckin’ feet? She’s valuable. To us and to people we come across. Worth a little trouble. Worth a whole hell of a lot more trouble than you. Know your goddamn place.” 

He lowered his gun and looked down to you. 

“You alright, little girl?” 

You were too shaken to fight the nickname. Instead, you just nodded. 

“Good.” 

He slung his rifle on his back and reached down, yanking you sharply to your feet, the movement so rough it shocked you. Once you were on your feet, he grabbed you by your chin, his callused fingers harsh on your cheeks, and pulled your face close, so close that you’d expect him to kiss you if he were your lover. 

But he wasn’t that. He was your captor. 

“Thought I told you not to try anything stupid,” he asked, his face almost eerily calm but his tone on the edge of anger. “You seem smart enough to know better, give you an inch and you decide to take a mile. Several, in fact. Maybe Vince is right, maybe we should kill you…” 

“Joel,” Tommy said cautiously but Joel threw him a glare and he quieted. 

“You really think you can do better than us out there? Hm?” He demanded. “You think you can survive all on your lonesome?” 

“No,” you said, fighting to not cry. You hated that you reacted this way, that when you were scared or mad your first instinct was to cry. “But I could find…” 

“Find what?” He cut you off. “Find someone else who’s willin’ to stick their necks out for you? Willing to feed you, shelter you without takin’ more from you?” 

He released your chin and you slumped back from him, massaging your face and working your jaw, trying to right it. 

“You’re damn lucky to be with us, little girl,” he snapped. “Real damn lucky. Better start actin’ like it instead of running off like some scared little rabbit. Hands out.” 

“But…” 

“No,” he shook his head firmly. “You lost the privilege of using your fuckin’ hands without my permission. Hands. Out.” 

You obeyed, arms trembling, and he bound your wrists together, the ropes finding the same indentations they’d made on your skin before. He dropped your wrists once they were bound and you looked at him as you still fought to not cry. His eyes met yours, sharp and cold. 

“You’re mine now,” he said harshly. “Sooner you figure that out, the easier this gets for you. Move.” 

The walk back to the cabin felt long and, when you got there, you went to lay on the couch but Joel stopped you. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” He asked, shrugging out of his coat. 

You frowned. 

“Going to sleep…”

“Not there you’re not,” he said. “You’re sleepin’ with me, you don’t get to be unsupervised anymore.” 

Your eyes went wide and you shook your head. 

“No, no, please, you said you weren’t…” 

“Wasn’t offerin’ to fuck you, girl,” he cut you off. “You’re sleeping where I can fucking see you so get in my bed.” 

Your whole body shook as he nudged you to one of the back rooms. You hadn’t been in one of these before. You had no idea how to try to escape if you needed to. It was stupid of you, you realized now, to trust Joel when he said they might be murderers but they weren’t rapists. Just because they hadn’t forced themselves on you yet didn’t mean they wouldn’t now. 

The room wasn’t huge, a queen sized bed in the middle and a sleeping bag on the floor. There was a door - to a closet, you assumed - and a dresser with some picture frames on top. 

“Shoes off,” Joel said. 

“Please,” you said softly. “Please don’t do this, I…” 

“Didn’t I say I wasn’t offering to fuck you?” He asked, sounding exasperated. “I don’t want you tracking dirt into the goddamn bed. Shoes off, get in on that side, one by the dresser. I’ll keep my hands to myself if you will.”

You obeyed and curled as tightly in on yourself as you could, facing away from him. You felt the bed dip as he climbed in, the heat of his body close to yours. But he didn’t touch you. 

“Actually sleep,” Joel muttered after a moment. 

You glanced over your shoulder at him. He was flat on his back, eyes closed, arms crossed over his chest. The opposite of someone who looked like they were about to grope you the second you passed out. 

Still, you rolled to face him, curled tightly on yourself, and watched him until his body loosened and his breaths evened. Tommy snored lightly from the sleeping bag on the floor. You weren’t sure if their unconscious state made it feel safe enough to rest or your body gave out from exhaustion but, the next thing you knew, it was morning and you were alone. 

You sat up slowly, hands still bound, an unfamiliar blanket draped over you that hadn’t been the night before. 

You made your way slowly, cautiously, to the main part of the small house. The men were talking in low voices around the kitchen table and you hovered for a moment, not sure if you wanted them to notice you or not. 

But Tommy was the first to see you there, a slow smile spreading over his face. 

“Well hey there little rabbit,” he took a sip from a mug. “You look rested.” 

“Probably wore herself out taking off,” Vince muttered. 

“Gonna be just you and me today,” Tommy said, ignoring Vince’s comments. “Those two are headin’ out to do some business.” 

“Business?” You asked, brows raised. “Is that code for murder?” 

“Our business is none of yours, little girl,” Joel said, drinking from a mug of his own. “You stay here, behave yourself, and maybe we’ll bring you something back.” 

“Rather not get anything that comes from killing,” you said. “Thanks though.” 

Joel just rolled his eyes and shoved back from the table. 

“You’ll take what I give you and you’ll like it,” he said, coming to stand in front of you. He put two fingers below your chin and tilted it, forcing you too look him in the eye. “Gonna take off on me again? Or do I need to tie your legs up, too?” 

You gritted your teeth. 

“No.”

“Good girl.” 

Tommy helped you use the bathroom and you sat on the couch with jerky and sore wrists and resentment as you watched Joel and Vince get ready to head out to do… whatever it was they were about to go and do. 

You weren’t sure what you were supposed to do to pass the time. You’d had some books in your bags but you weren’t about to risk pissing off the men for a little entertainment. 

But Tommy didn’t let you sit in silence for too long, flopping down next to you on the couch as you tried to find patterns in the peeling paint of he wall. You looked at him, cagey. He smiled. 

“You’re cute when you sleep.” 

You frowned. 

“What?” 

“You’re cute when you sleep,” he said again. “All curled up and shit, just like a little rabbit.” 

You shrank back from him and he put his hands up. 

“Not gonna touch you,” he said. “Unless you wanted me to.” 

“Well… I don’t.”

He shrugged. 

“Didn’t expect you would,” he said. 

He was quiet again for a few minutes before he spoke again, a gleam in his eye when he did. 

“Wouldn’t happen to play poker, would you?”

You didn’t but he seemed happy enough to teach you. But you couldn’t hold the cards well with your wrists bound and, after a few minutes of struggling, Tommy glanced toward the door like he was half expecting Joel to walk through it. 

“Gimme those,” he said, holding his hands out. You thrust your wrists at him faster than you were proud of and he laughed a little, taking hold of you gently. He paused before starting at the rope. “You’re not gonna take off on me, right, little rabbit?” 

“Not at the moment,” you said. 

“Good,” he replied, untying you. “Not a fan of keepin’ you all tied up anyway…” 

You turned your wrists, the bones popping as you luxuriated in the movement. 

“Thank you,” you said, massaging one wrist and then the other. 

He shrugged. 

“The game is Texas Hold ‘Em,” he said, dealing. “We’ll play a few hands open and then see how you do…” 

It was oddly easy to forget that you were being held captive when playing cards with Tommy. He was lighter than the other men, more like people you remembered from before, making easy going conversation about things that hadn’t mattered in more than a year. 

“I’m still mad that I didn’t get to see the second Matrix,” you said, watching as Tommy put the flop on the table. 

“That, darlin’, was a blessing,” he replied. “Wasn’t nearly as good as the first.” 

“I heard that, but still,” you said, looking at the seven of clubs, three of hearts and king of clubs on the table and trying not to smile at the seven of spades and king of hearts in your hand. “I think it might have been better than I heard. And maybe it would have made more sense when the third one came out…” 

“Maybe,” Tommy said, putting the turn on the table. Ace of diamonds, no good for you. “But I dunno, you seem too smart to like something that shitty.” 

“Bold assumption,” you smiled a little and he smiled back. 

“Before I put the river card out,” he said. “How about we make this interesting?” 

“Interesting,” you frowned. “Interesting how?” 

“I win, you tell me something about yourself,” he said. “You win, I’ll give you something you want. Can’t be a weapon but something else.” 

You looked at him, brows raised. 

“C’mon, little rabbit,” he gave you a cocky smirk. “Let’s have some fun.” 

You looked at your hand again. 

“Alright,” you smiled a little. “Let’s do it.” 

The river was the king of spades and you tried not to smile too wide. 

“Alright,” he said, looking like he was holding back a grin himself. “I’ll show you mine then you show me yours.” 

You shrugged and he smiled as he put the king of diamonds and the three of spades on the table. 

“Full house,” he said. “Kings over threes.” 

“Damn,” you sighed. “I just have the kings…” you lowered the card, looking disappointed and enjoyed Tommy’s excited expression for half a second before you put the second card on the table. “Oh, and the sevens. Sevens are higher than threes, right? I mean, I only went to nursing school, I can’t be sure…” 

“You little shit,” Tommy laughed. “You’ve got a damn fine poker face on you! Alright, what is it you want?” 

“My books,” you said immediately. “I had two, I think, in my pack. I’d like them. Please.” 

“I can get you the books,” he smiled. “You sit tight.” 

He brought you the books and you played another hand with the same stakes. And another. And another. And more after that.

You got some hair ties and clean socks out of the deal. Tommy got to know your favorite food and what you liked to watch on TV back when there was TV. 

After a while, he looked at the books that you’d set aside on the table. He picked up the top one, Slaughterhouse Five. 

“Think this was on my reading list in high school,” he said, looking over the back of it. “Never actually read it though.” 

“It’s good,” you said. “You missed out.” 

“Read it to me,” he said, holding it out to you. 

“Read it to you?” You asked, brows raised. “What are you, five?” 

“Never much enjoyed reading,” he shrugged, still holding the book out. “But I like listening. Like listening to you well enough. C’mon, little rabbit. Tell me a story.” 

You considered him for a moment. You felt oddly safe with Tommy. You weren’t sure if it was because he was showing you kindness and one of the only three people left in the world you knew now or if he was actually safe. You weren’t sure you could trust anything you were thinking and feeling. 

But reading to him didn’t sound bad. 

“Can we move to the couch?” You asked. 

He laughed. 

“Think we can manage it.” 

You settled on the couch, you folded into a corner and Tommy stretched out. He watched you closely as you opened the book. 

“All this happened, more or less…” 

You fell asleep on the couch before Joel and Vince made it back but you woke up in he bed, Tommy snoring next to you. 

Part 2

A/N: Hey yeah so... this was supposed to be a one shot but it got away from me. So now it's two parts. Part two up sometime within the next week or so ❤️

[literallykenmaandshoyo]

When It Snows

Bruce Wayne x Reader (gender neutral)Requested by: N/A Proofread: By my bestie Brian :) Genre: Fluff Music: A playlist for a 19th-century villain rejoicing in his fallen enemies Warnings: N/A Summary: Batman doesn't take breaks, but you can convince Bruce Wayne to Author's Note: Bruce Wayne….let me take care of you babygirl…

-Mod Kenma

Even when missions and stakeouts go right, it’s hard for Bruce to catch a break. He had a couple of new stitches and a bruised rib. Of course, you were there to patch him up. It was something that you had to get used to, seeing your husband bruised and bloody, in desperate need of a doctor.

So when winter came, you practically begged Bruce to take a break. It was the holidays, and winter was coming. It was the perfect time to rest and take a moment to breathe. After a long conversation, weighing the pros and cons, you convinced Bruce to take a weekend trip with you.

The two of you booked a cabin in the forest, far enough away to not have to worry about Gotham but close enough to keep tabs on our children. You both packed light, deciding to stay inside and enjoy each other's company. It was a bit chilly but far better than the humidity in Gotham. It was constantly sticky, an uncomfortable warmth.

The cabin was beautiful, furnished with dark oak wood. It was the perfect amount of comfortable and classy. You both began to unpack, enjoying the sound of the birds chirping and the rustle of the trees from the wind. It even began to sprinkle, a rare occurrence. In Gotham, it usually only thundered, fat raindrops crashing down.

Instead of sleeping in the bedroom, the two of you found comfort in the living room, cuddling on the couch in front of the fire. Thick wool blankets covered you both, shielding you from the cold that seeped through the cabin. Moments like this were right out of a romance novel, the soft sound of rain and the warmth of the fireplace.

In the early morning, when you both awoke, Bruce realized how bright it was outside. It was confusing at first. Why was it so bright? The two of you peeked out of a window, curious. To the surprise of both of you, a fresh blanket of snow draped over everything outside. Snow. Snow was so rare that you assumed you'd never see it in your lifetime here. Bruce had the same surprised look on his face as you did, just as amazed.

Without a warning, you slipped on your shoes and opened the front door. A blast of cold air hit you, making you shiver. Bruce followed you outside, draping a sweater over your shoulders. The two of you walked around in the snow, astonished. The snow looked soft, smooth even. It was beautiful. There were small footprints of birds and squirrels, teeny tiny little prints that made you giggle as you bent down to look at them.  

Bruce couldn't stop himself from taking a few pictures of you on his phone, savoring how carefree you looked, and how some snow fell onto your hair whenever you walked near a tree. He couldn't help it, you looked too happy, too pretty to not take some photos. The two of you made silly shapes in the snow with sticks, writing each other's names and drawing.

Bruce's ability to write in the snow was far better than yours, but you were able to draw better stick figures than he could. It seemed laughable,  Bruce Wayne, Batman, and his lover playing in the snow. But right now, he wasn't Bruce Wayne or Batman. He was just Bruce, just a man with his life partner in the snow. There were no paparazzi, no villains, nobody to keep an image up for.

This was something you needed to do more often, finding your own little pockets of time that were filled with moments like this. Where the world is still for a moment, and life is okay.

[jazzthatonewriterchick]

Lost in the Woods (Werewolf!BakuKiri x Black!Plus-Sized!Fem!Reader 18+ One Shot)

"You scared now, baby?"

Pairing: Katsuki Bakugou x Kirishima Ejirou x Black!Plus-sized!Fem!Reader

Synopsis: In which you get lost on your way home one night while coming back from a party and end up straight in the jaws of two strange yet sexy men who you get the feeling aren't quite human.

Warnings: Smutty Smut; 18+ (MINORS GTFO); Reader is Black, Fem & Plus-Sized; Reader is Drunk; Monster Fucking; Coercion; Dubcon; Rape (to be safe); Foreplay; Biting; Mild Degradation; Mutual Oral; Double Blowjob; Double Cunnilingus/Analingus; Big Dicks/Knots; Knotting; Unprotected PIV Sex; Doggystyle; Cowgirl; Unprotected Creampies; Aftercare

Disclaimer: I own none of the characters mentioned in this fic. However, as this is my writing, I do not give permission for my work to be reposted on any other sites that are not from my own accounts. Thank you!

Writer's Note: Happy Halloween, y'all!! 🎃🎃 Enjoy!! -Jazz

***********

It has gotten darker outside. Way darker than it usually is around this time in the fall.

You walk along the trail in your fake cat ears leading to your co-worker's rented cabin deep in the woods, clutching your leather jacket closer to your plump frame and tasting your third drink on your tongue. You're still not sure what's in it, but you can taste the vodka and the fruity juice flavors with every sip you've taken since you've gotten to the party.

You originally were supposed to stay at the party for only an hour, but that turned into four. Four hours of watching your bestie shake her ass in her ladybug costume and dealing with your coworker and the host of the party flirt with you. Though Denki Kaminari is cute and loaded from his rich parents, he also is a huge slut.

He has what you call "community dick". The guy gets around to almost every girl in your office, minus you, of course. He's been trying which is why he invited you to his Halloween party, but you aren't interested. You thought the man was going to cry earlier when he saw you put on your jacket and head to the door.

Aww, you're leavin'?" he asked in his makeshift toga and leaf headpiece. He was supposed to be a Greek God. "But I'm about to start the competition and announce the winners!"

"I know, but I'm really tired and it's really dark out there," you sighed, trying to seem like you're apologetic.

"You sure you wanna drive?" he asked, sounding concerned. "Didn't you drink tonight?" You shook your head, your hand moving to grasp the doorknob behind you. "I didn't drive here. I took an Uber."

"You don't need to take no Uber, sweetheart," he tutted. "Not when you've got a personal chauffeur right here! Lemme drive you home. I promise that my ride is faster." He smiled big, confident, seductive smile at you that you're sure gets all the ladies' pussies wet, but you weren't swayed.

You gave him a small smile, desperate to leave. The music was too loud and your social battery was running way low. "That's very sweet of you, Denki, but I'm good. I'm gonna wait in the driveway."

Denki's eyes ticked outside the window where the woods lay in wait for you. "Well, my house is surrounded by woods. You sure you wanna walk alone out there? Wouldn't want all the creepy-crawlies and freaks to get you." He smirked down at you, cocking his head to the side."Lemme walk you," he whispered. "It would at least make me feel better. Plus, I'm great company."

He gave you that same seductive smirk as he leaned in, no doubt attempting to corner you against the door. You began to twist the knob, opening it in preparation to run out and escape his tricks."Thank you, but–"

"Heeey, girl," Mina, your coworker and bestie, sing-songed. She inserted herself right between you and Denki, drunk and a major cockblock (and your savior). "You havin' fun?" She side-eyed Denki who gave her a sharp glare before slinking off to attend to two of his guests who were about to fight over the last mini-pumpkin cupcake at the snack table.

"Yeah, but it's getting dark out there," you pointed out, relieved that Denki left. "Shouldn't we be heading home soon?"

"Go home?" Mina scoffed. "Denki said we're all welcome here! He cleaned out his five guest rooms upstairs just for us...or rather, for you." She giggled as you rolled your eyes. "You know, he's hoping you'll stay the night."

"Yeah, I know," you muttered. "But it ain't gonna happen. Denki gets around too much."

"So?" Mina scoffed. "I've heard he's good! Plus, it's not like you're looking for a forever. It's just a one-night thing you clear your head and get you some dick."

Mina is so convinced that you need to start dating if not having meaningless sex with coworkers if not men at bars, clubs, or online (which is hella dangerous). To her, you could use the release to ease your stress from your job and life, but in your eyes, you're more than happy using your fingers and toys to get that release. However, you would be lying if you said that you didn't want someone to break you off, but so far, you haven't found a man who could do so for you.

"I'm fine, Mina, really," you chuckled. "I know you think that I need some dick to ease my stress at work, but I can handle myself just fine." Mina didn't look too happy with that but didn't push it. "Whatever," she sighed. "But at least stay for the costume competition. You'll get to see me win for my super-cute costume!"

"Sorry, hon," you giggled, playing with her fake antenna, "but the dark isn't gonna wait for that. You know how I feel about traveling in the dark anyway. I'm just gonna bounce and call you when I get home."

At this, Mina grew worried. "You sure you don't want me to walk you?" But you shook your head, not wanting to interrupt her fun. "I'll be fine, Mina," you reassured her. "I'm just gonna wait in the driveway for my ride. You stay and have fun."

You wish you had just stayed in Denki's driveway like you said you would. You wish you never decided to venture along the trail to find the road. It's too dark, and you're too tipsy. You're not at all dressed for a walk, such as this one either–a mini dress that hugs your plump, chunky body, a leather jacket, fake cat ears, and black pumps that you try to walk slowly in to avoid breaking your ankle.

Plus, and this is the main reason, the forest is starting to creep you out. It is quiet. Too quiet, as if something is causing this eery silence. The woods trail is rather bumpy, and the trees seem taller than before when you came here four hours ago. They are bare of any leaves and their branches stretch towards the sky like long, crooked fingers. Speaking of the sky, there isn't a single star in it–just the large, white moon that looks almost ominous behind the clouds floating among the inky, black canvas.

You thought that making it to the road would make it easier for the Uber driver to find you when you ordered, but you can't even find the road. You ordered the ride before leaving Denki's party, hoping to make it there before the driver could call.

But now you're realizing that you should've just called before. 'You stupid bitch,' you think. So you call your driver now as you keep a hand out to grab onto trees for balance as you hike down the trail. The driver answers after three rings, but they sound grainy and broken.

"Hello?" you say into the phone.

"Hi, is this Y/N?" the Uber driver asks. "I was just going to call you. I'm here."

"Shit, you are?" you reply, your stomach leaping in fear. You only have five minutes to reach them and you still don't know where you're going! "H-Hang on, I'm comin' now. I can't find the road."

"I'm sorry, I'm having trouble hearing you," the driver says. "I can't seem to find a way through these trees."

"It's through the woods!" you call. "There's a trail that leads to the address. If you follow it, you'll find me there." Silence follows and you panic, thinking they hung up. "Hello, you there?" you call.

"Hello?" the driver asks. "Y/N, are you still there?"

"Yes!" you call. "Hang on, I'll come to you!" You waddle and stumble along the trail, pushing a long branch out of your face. "Can you still hear me?" Silence. "Hello?" you call into the phone. "Helloooo?"

Still nothing. You look at your phone to find that the call has dropped. "Goddammit!" you groan. Of course, this happens to you. Realizing that you're out of luck and have no clue where you are, you dial Mina's number and turn back around where you came.

Four rings go by before she picks up and you're hit by a barrage of sounds–music, yelling, and laughter. "Hello?" she shouts into your ear. "Mina, I'm coming back," you sigh. "My Uber driver can't find me and–"

"Y/N, you're breaking up!" she shouts. "I can't hear you!" Her voice begins to sound grainy and chopped, her words cutting off. "Mina?" you ask. "Mina, can you hear me?" Nothing but silence follows.

You look at the four bars on your screen, finding them to be completely gone. No reception. "Fuck!" you groan. Tonight is now a complete shit show. The beginning of a horror film. However, if keep on the trail to Denki's cabin, knowing you have a better chance of calling another ride there.

But then you get lost. Very, very lost. "What the fuck?" you whisper to yourself. "Where's the cabin?"

What looks like the trail to Denki's cabin turns out not to be...or is it? You can't quite decipher the trail anymore. Or where you are. Everything looks the same–the same leafless trees and brush stretching around you, making you feel suffocated; the same dark shadows; the same dirt trail that leads to nowhere.

Even worse is the darkness. It has gotten increasingly worse since you've been out here, stumbling about. You can barely make out the trees now, bumping into a few as you walk. The quietness only makes you feel more paranoid. All that you hear is the lone hooting of an owl and your heavy breathing in your ears. It's uncomfortable. Unsettling. Like something is lurking among the woods, ready to pounce at the perfect opportunity.

You go for your phone to switch on the flashlight only to find your phone on 20%. You growl in frustration, stomping your heel. How did you forget to charge it before you left Denki's party? "God, can this get any worse for me?" you sigh to the heavens.

And as if answering you, a droplet falls from the cloudy night sky onto your forehead. You gasp at the sudden feeling, pressing your hand to your forehead to feel the wetness. And then another one falls. And another. Soon, you are caught in a downpour. "Shit!" you squeal and take off your heels before immediately start running to avoid the rain.

You don't know where you're going but you run anyway, desperate to find the road or someone who may be out here to help you. Maybe one of Denki's guests from the party or a hiker. Maybe a camper. As you peel back tree branches and try to avoid pits of mud that have begun to churn from the rain, you finally find your light in the darkness.

Through the trees protrudes a cozy-looking house in a clearing, surrounded by a stack of logs for firewood and smelling of something spicy and warm. The windows are aglow which means someone is inside. Someone who can help you! "Oh, thank you, God," you sigh.

But as you go to run towards the house, you hit your foot on an overgrown tree root and go tumbling. With a shriek, you fall to your hands and knees, luckily not scraping them but staining them with dirt. Your heart lurches into your throat and you try to calm yourself. "Relax," you whisper. "You're okay. There's no one out there to hurt you."

"Well, look who stumbled along the trail," a teasing voice says. "Literally." Immediately, you look up and scurry away from the two figures standing above you. They are big. Huge, even. All lean muscle, broad arms, and thick, toned thighs and calves that could crush watermelons under their clothes.

They're not too bad looking either. The one on the right has a platinum blonde undercut, a sharp jaw any model would be jealous of, an eyebrow piercing, and a lip ring that glints in the moonlight in his plump, pink bottom lip. His vermillion eyes feel like hot rays on you as he glares down at you. "Who the fuck are you?" he growls. "Why are you here?"

You try to find the words to speak, but you're still too in shock from what has happened to you and the two strangers standing before you. "I-I..."

"Chill out, Katsuki," the one on the left chuckles. He is bigger than the blonde with long, red locks of hair, tattoos, and a toothy smile that unnerves you slightly. "You alright, miss? Sorry about him. He's territorial of our home is all."

He offers his hand to you, and though you hesitate at first, you take it and let him pick you up off the ground. "That's your house?" you ask, nodding at the cozy home. Katsuki glares suspiciously at you. "Why? You lookin' to break in or something?"

"N-No," you stutter, intimidated by his roughness. "I came from a party up the way and I couldn't find the road to catch my Uber."

Both men look at each other, realizing your story. "Oh," the redhead says, that grin still on his face. "You're lost. Gone too deep down the rabbit hole?" You don't answer, unnerved by his teasing and their presence.

"So that explains why a pretty thing like you is out here alone," the redhead comments, crossing his buff arms over his broad chest. "So no one walked you out here?"

You shake your head, hugging your jacket to your soaked body. "I told them not to," you admit, feeling guilty. "I thought this wasn't going to happen."

"Well, no one expects to get lost in the woods," the redhead chuckles. "But don't fret. You've got us and we know these woods like the back of our hands. It's not safe to be out here alone on such a dark night though. It could be...dangerous."

Something in the way he says this and the glint in his eyes makes you uncomfortable. There is something off about these two, you realize. Something ferocious. Predatory, like an animal. "I-I just need wifi," you stutter. "Or a phone to call my friend and tell her I'm here."

"You need more than that, sweetness," the redhead chuckles. "You're soaked to the bone! Guess you got caught in the rain." He nods over to their home. "Come on in and we'll help you out. We'll get you a towel and a phone."

"Really?" you ask, shocked by their kindness...and also wary. "Of course!" he laughs, his crimson eyes kind. "It wouldn't be many of us to have a beautiful lady out here alone and lost. Ain't that right, Katsuki?"

The blonde says nothing but keeps his eyes pinned on you. "Oh, I never introduced us!" the redhead tuts. "That's so rude of me. I'm Kirishima, but just call me Kiri. This is Katsuki. Say hi, 'Suki." Once again, Katsuki doesn't speak. "And you are?"

"Y/N," you softly answer. "Thanks for helping me out, but I just need a phone or a wifi password."

"What, you scared to come in or something?" Katsuki snarls. "You have no problem walking around out there in that." He nods at your mini dress and cat ears, making you flush.

"Leave her alone, Katsuki," Kiri growls. "I happen to think she looks amazing." He gives you a wink that makes your stomach flip. "I know it's weird since we're strangers and all, but we'd really feel bad if you just waited out here. We've got spicy ramen cookin' in there too, if you want any."

You should say no. You should firmly stand your ground and tell them to just give you a phone. But against your better judgment and taken by their strange attractiveness, you give in. "Okay," you sigh.

They guide you to their home and get you inside just as the rain becomes a thick sheet. Their home is cozy, warm, and has a roaring, brick fireplace. The walls are made of thick logs packed tight together and the furniture is covered in throw pillows and comfy blankets. Kiri leads you over to the couch and hands you a blanket to wrap yourself in while Katsuki heads to the kitchen. "Take a seat and we'll get you set up," he says. "And get comfortable. That's what the couch is here for." 

He smiles at you before heading off to gather some things for you. You sit there, shivering under the blanket after taking off your coat, doing your best to relax. But you can’t. Not when you’re in two strangers’ home with your phone halfway to death and in the pouring rain. There has to be a phone you can get to. You begin to look around for a phone, but are interrupted the Kiri returns with a towel and a tray holding a steaming bowl for you. "Here's a towel for you," he coos. "And a pipin' hot bowl of ramen if you're hungry. I'm sure you worked up an appetite at that party and walking through the woods." 

He hands you the towel and carefully places the tray down next to you. ”Thanks," you mutter. Kiri gives you your space and sits in a chair across the room, but he doesn’t take his eyes off of you. He watches you very carefully as you slowly slurp down the ramen, clearing your throat from the spiciness. He chuckles under his breath whenever you do. 

Katsuki then returns to the living room, his shoes off and clad in a V-neck and jeans that sit low on his hips. "Landline's down," he passively says. "The rain must've fucked it up." Kiri sighs while your stomach flips in panic. "Aw, man," he sighs. "Any luck with your phone, Y/N?" Something about the way he says his name in that raspy voice sends shivers down your spine. 

You ignore them and check your phone, finding it to be on 10% and the bars still low. You shake your head, ready to scream in frustration. "Guess you're stuck with us for a minute then,” Kiri says, sounding apologetic. Katsuki doesn’t say anything at all, still standing in the middle of the living room, adding to the tension you feel. “Does…this happen often?" you carefully question. 

Kiri shrugs, leaning back in his chair. ”Sometimes, if the rain is real bad. It's just one of the things about living away from the city in the middle of the forest." He gives you a humored grin, a twinkle in his crimson eyes. "You're probably wondering why we're out here, hm? Well, city life just got to be too much. Sometimes you just wanna be wild and free. Feral, if you will." 

His smile turns sharper and almost just as feral as he describes. You don’t even look at Katsuki. You’re too afraid too. Instead, you look down at your feet and squeeze the blanket closer to your form. "So what about you?" Kiri asks. "What's your life like outside of these woods?" 

‘Lie!’ your brain tells you. ‘Don’t tell them anything about you!’ But you also don’t know if they’ll know you’re lying. So you tell the truth, but keep things as tame and vague as possible. ”Well, I live in the city and I work in an office. I just came from a work costume party that my coworker was throwing." Kiri nods, his eyes scaling over your fake cat ears and legs poking out of the blanket. ”Well, you've dressed the part for it." 

"And decided to come in here to show us," Bakugou growls, speaking for the first time in minutes. His hot gaze runs over you as if he can see right through the thick blanket. "Ignore him," Kiri says, rolling his eyes. "He thinks you look fantastic, as do I. I'm sure all your coworkers of the opposite sex were re all over you tonight." 

You’re not sure if he says this to comfort or relax you, but it doesn’t do either. Your body is wound up like a drum and you feel hot with discomfort. ”T-Thank you," you whisper. "No, I...I didn't want that. I don't date my coworkers...or hook up with them." 

"That's a good idea," Kiri replies, nodding in approval. "It often makes your job complicated. But it relieves the tension, don't you think?" He pauses, letting the pitter-patter of the rain fill the silence. ”Eases the stress?" he suggests, smirking at you. 

Katsuki’s eyes find you. They are sharp and intense, glaring at your very soul. You find it hard to breathe and have to push away the ramen because your stomach is flipping too much. You need to get out of here now. So you stand, letting the blanket fall, and grab your jacket. 

"You okay, cutie?" Kiri questions, sounding worried. 

"The rain eased up," you huff. And it has––you can’t hear the harshness of it anymore. It is softer which means it’s easier to travel through now. ”And it's getting late. I-I think I should leave." 

Kiri’s brows knit in confusion. ”Didn't you wanna call someone first?" he asks. "And why leave if you got lost before?"

"Don't feed into that bullshit she's spouting," Bakugou scoffs. "It's just a cover to hide how scared she is of us." You stand rigidly near the couch, your eyes flicking to the door across the way. Maybe you can run. 

”Is that true, sweetie?" Kiri asks almost sweetly. "Are you afraid of us?" They both stare at you, waiting for your answer. Your heart thunders wildly in your chest, your blood pumping in your ears. You don’t know how to get out of this or what to say. "I…I…” Your brain is moving slow like it’s moving through sludge, your thoughts jumbled. 

"'Cause you should," Kiri finishes, his tone dark and low. "You should be very afraid. But we won't hurt you...unless you want us to." 

He stands up from his chair, making your fight or flight kick in. Both men stand before you now, not touching you but also giving you the feeling that they could stop you at any point from leaving. You can’t escape now. Their predatory gazes stop you from moving entirely. 

"Why leave when you know you're curious?" Katsuki asks, raising his pierced eyebrow. "Or should I say horny?" You blink at him, confused and taken aback. ”W-What?” you squeak. 

"Don't play the fuckin' fool, girl," he growls. "Why else did you come up in our home when you don't even know us? And don't say it was because of our hospitality or for our wifi." 

Now, you begin creeping towards the door. Their eyes follow you, but then don’t stop you. ”I don't know what you mean," you whimper fearfully. "Please, I just wanna leave." You slam your back against the door and try the knob, but it doesn’t budge. Locked. You’re completely trapped. 

Katsuki and Kiri stand side by side now, watching you, eating you up with their eyes. ”We don't want you to leave," Kiri softly growls, but his voice doesn't sound human. It is deep and growly as if he is an animal. He blinks and his eyes turn from a sharp red to an eery, golden iris. Katsuki’s eyes do the same, shifting from human to not at all. 

You try the knob again, now panicking. Even though you know it’s locked, you try again and again, pathetically so. But you don't take your eyes off of the two men in front of you…and you wish you did. You really wish you never witnessed what you are right now.

Instantly, the two men grow taller and bigger, their muscles widening and growing thicker. Their teeth grow sharp like pointed fangs and their nails turn into claws that protrude from fine-haired, paw-like fingers and toes. The hair on their heads grows wild and untamed, just as their eyes do as they rake them over your body. Fluffy ears and tails protrude from their heads and backsides, indicating that they are, indeed, not human. 

As their bodies grow and their muscles swell, their clothes rip to shreds and fall from their bodies, leaving them completely naked. Your eyes instantly fall to their shafts swinging between their thighs, your mouth falling open. They are huge. Thick. Long. You know they would reach your stomach if they got inside you. You can already feel the lockjaw. you’ve never been so scared of dick before. 

Katsuki smirks down at you. ”You scared now, baby?" he asks in a low growl. 

You press yourself against the door, your heart hammering and breath coming out in panicked huffs. "What the fuck are you two?” you whisper. 

"Two men who are gonna give you what you really want," Katsuki replies. "And you're gonna give us what we want too." They then crouch down and begin to creep toward you on all fours, their eyes still on you. Tears begin to prick at your eyes as you grapple with the doorknob, begging someone, anyone, to save you. ”Please,” you whisper. 

That is all you can say as they creep closer and closer to you. Katsuki takes one side while Kiri takes the other, both standing up and towering of you. "You’re too deep in the forest now, baby," Kiri whispers, a smirk on his face. "Wouldn’t be wise to wander around in the dark by yourself at this hour anyway. Too many predators.” 

One of his huge, clawed hands brushes a hair out of your face. You flinch away from him.

"It’s better to just stay with us. You can kill two birds with one stone: stay here for our protection and take responsibility for your slutty little actions.” He says it so sweetly that you almost miss the last part. 

“What?” you squeak. ”I-I’m not a–" 

"The fuck you aren't," Katsuki snarls. He pokes at your cat ears, nearly knocking them off of your head. He then moves closer to you, moving so close that you can feel the heat radiating off of his big body. “Comin’ in here dressed like that...smelling so fuckin' good...you're practically handing yourself over to us on a silver platter." 

"Mmm, I like that," Kiri hums, tweaking your cat ears as he presses into you from behind. "I like my toys eager. Vulnerable. And so, so easy to please." You are now sandwiched between the two werewolves, trapped. You can feel yourself shivering and trembling between them, your purse still in your hands.

Katsuki presses his nose into your hair and inhales deeply, a deep growl vibrating through his chest. ”God, I just wanna rip off her clothes and pound her right here," he growls. You nearly gasp at his vulgar words. ”Patience, ‘Suki,” Kiri says. “We have to ease her into it." His hand comes across your neck to turn your head towards him. ”Your lips are trembling, baby," he coos. "I know how to ease those nerves." 

Then his lips are on yours, giving you a slow yet hungry kiss that takes the air right out of your lungs. He played with you during, pulling away to lick and lightly nibble at your bottom lip with his pointed canines, relishing the tiny gasps you let out with every new sensation. He then pulls away, lightly pulling at your bottom lip until it pops back into place. ”How was that?” he asks, his voice husky and lustful. “Exactly what you needed?" 

You don’t want to admit it, but it is. That kiss was hot, passionate, and lustful. It gave you butterflies and made your pussy wet. You can feel yourself gushing now despite your situation and you feel like a disgusting, nasty little whore for even feeling like this. Katsuki lets out a deep, rumbling growl from in front of you, his hands sliding up your thick hips. "Fuck, I can’t take this waiting game anymore," he impatiently growls. "Keep teasing her while I get these clothes off of her. I need to see her without this fuckin’ thing.”  

Kiri chuckles as he begins to kiss and suckle on your neck, leaving hickeys in his wake. "Doesn’t look like you need to do much, Kats. Just tear off that dress and we’ll get right to the main course." His eyes rake over your body and your little black dress, his hands sneaking under to toy with your thick thighs. ”Mmm, such a naughty outfit. She definitely came here for a reason.” He smirks at you, his gaze hooded and devious. "Let us give it to you then." 

"No, wait!" you protest. 

But it’s too late. Katsuki is already tearing the little black piece of fabric off of your body, revealing all of you to him and Kiri––your pudgy stomach; your jiggly thighs and thick ass ridden in stretch marks and cellulite; your juicy breasts held up by your laced push-up bra. Both werewolves stare at you like you’re a full course meal, practically salivating at the mouth at the sight of you. "Aww, that little yelp was so cute!” Kiri giggles, his hands still wandering among your thighs and backside. “Was that your favorite dress, sweetheart?" 

Katsuki could give less of a shit as he kneels before you. ”She shouldn’t have worn it then. I hope you hate these stockings you’re wearing ‘cause they’re goin’ too." He then shreds your nylon stockings to pieces while Kiri’s fingers curl below between your thighs. “And these little panties. Doesn’t look like you’ll need ‘em anymore." 

Before you can take a breath, one clawed finger cut at both straps of your panties. Katsuki does the same to your bra, cutting the straps off your shoulders so they fall off of your breasts. Each piece of undergarments fall off of you, leaving your breasts and pussy exposed. You whimper in protest, moving to cover yourself, but Katsuki slaps your hands away. “No,” he sternly says. “Don’t you dare hide yourself from us.” 

“You’re absolutely gorgeous, baby,” Kiri sighs, nuzzling his nose into your neck. “So fuckin’ sexy.” Katsuki’s mouth attaches to your nipples, sucking hungrily on the hardened peaks as his hands grope and mold your breasts. You instinctively your head back, your eyes fluttering closed at the sensations. Here you are, standing naked in your heels in front of two total strangers who may or may not eat you or let you leave. 

‘How the fuck did this happen?’ you think. 

This is all you can think when the wolves stop their ministrations and push you down on the couch. They stand over you, each muscle and vein of their thick cocks glinting in the moonlight that has appeared through the window. The rain has stopped. "Bend over the couch," Katsuki demands. "We wanna taste how wet you are, and don't try to play like you're not." 

Though you’re trembling, you do as he says and bend over the couch, presenting your ass to the strange men. You hear them growl and groan in arousal at the sight of you. "Oooh, you're right, 'Suki," Kiri cackles. "She is wet for us." You then feel his fangs drag across your asscheeks, emitting squeaks and moans of pleasure from your mouth. "And so responsive from these ass bites," he giggles. "Don't fret, cutie. We'll take good care of this poor pussy." 

He bends down with Katsuki following suit, hypnotized by your sobbing, wet, brown cunt. He takes a finger and lightly glides it against your labia that hangs. You twitch pathetically at his touch, your toes curling. "Wanna share this kitty with me?" Kiri teasingly asks. 

”As long as I get to taste her, I could give less of a fuck,” Katsuki huffs. 

Then their mouths, tongues, and soft lips are on your pussy, slurping and sucking up everything you give them. As soon as their mouths touch you, your mouth falls open into an O and your eyes flutter shut. Their tongues slide through your walls to slurp at your pussy and their lips suckle gentle on your clit, sending shivers and shocks of pleasure throughout your body. 

“Shit,” you moan, gripping the back of the couch for dear life. You’ve never had someone eat your pussy so well before. Let alone two men! …Or two not-entirely-human men. They don’t just stay in one place either. They switch places, alternating between your pussy and your asshole. When Katsuki is busy tongue fucking your pussy and sucking on your clit, Kiri places his tongue all over your asshole, nipping and biting at your cheeks before dipping his tongue back between them. "You taste so good, kitty," he sighs. "We could eat you up." 

Katsuki growls in agreement, placing his hands on your hips as he devours your cunt. You can hardly speak. All that exits your mouth are moans, whines, and cries of pleasure that seem to explode out of you. The more their mouths move and their moans vibrate against your clit, the farther you’re taken to your orgasm. Soon, that knot in your core is tightening, threatening to snap, and your moans grow louder and more shrill. "Fuck!" you scream. "Fuck, I'm gonna cum! I'm about to cum!” 

Kiri repeatedly moans “uh-huh” into your pussy now, taking Katsuki’s spot while his blonde partner devours your ass. ”Fuckin’ do it," Katsuki growls. "Cum all over us, you little slut." Then you feel two fingers flicking at your clit and this is all it takes for you to finally explode all over the men devouring your pussy. 

When you cum, you cum hard. Actually, you damn well squirt all over the wolves’ faces as a chorus of moans and whimpers leave your mouth. You’re seeing stars and your head is clouded as you cum, your hands gripping the couch. Katsuki and Kiri excitedly and delightedly take what you give them, hungrily growling as they slurp up all of your squirt that drips down your asscrack and pussy. They clean you up until you’re twitching and sensitive, whimpering at the feeling of physical contact against your clit. 

Finally, they stop and let you breathe. You are sweaty, tired, and drained. And yet so, so satisfied. You’ve never cum so hard before. You tiredly turn your head up to the two men standing behind you, noticing them licking your juices off of their lips and fingers as if they can’t get enough of you. Katsuki then turns to you, his hand wrapped around his thick cock dripping pre for you. "You're not done yet, little slut," he huskily says. "Open your mouth for us. Wide.” 

Kiri stands beside him, also lazily fisting his cock with its angry-red tip dripping pre-cum for you. You don’t move from the couch and they don’t force you to. You’re too weak from your intense orgasm to do much except shift onto your knees on the couch and open your mouth as Katsuki demands. Kiri goes first, first tapping his head lightly on your tongue before sliding balls deep into your mouth. You try to accommodate to his size by stretching your jaw and breathing through your nose, but it’s hard at first. He’s just so big and thick! 

The redhead is less than quiet or subtle about how good your mouth feels as he begins to slowly fuck your throat. Lewd gagging and squelching noises escape your mouth as he does so, drool beginning to drip from your mouth. As he does, Katsuki fucks one of your hands, tiny grunts and groans leaving his lips as he watches you swallow Kiri’s cock. “That’s it, little kitty,” Kiri groans. “Open that throat for us. You’re such a good girl takin’ two big cocks at once.” 

A hand falls onto your scalp, stroking your hair. 

Then it’s Katsuki’s turn. He isn’t as nice or slow as Kiri. He is rough; hard; downright feral. He fucks your face like it’s his own personal fuck toy, making you gag and choke all over his dick. You do so to the best of your ability, your makeup running and cat ears askew. You stare up at him as he does as he pleases, getting an eyeful of his pelvis and toned stomach. “Don’t use no teeth either, slut,” he grunts. “If you do, you can make sure you’ll be punished for it.” 

Kiri chuckles as he fucks your free hand, holding onto your neck to give you support as Katsuki fucks your throat. “Have confidence in her, Kats. She’s been doin’ such a good job so far, fuuuuck…” His words turn into a moan and his eyes roll back as he continues to thrust into your hand like it’s your pussy. 

And they switch. And switch again. And again. They use your throat and hands like you’re nothing more than a cock sleeve to them. They’re own little toy. They fondle your breasts and lean down to smack your ass. They touch, squeeze, and stroke every part of you as they fuck your throat until it’s raw and your eyes are watery. Mascara drips down your face and your lipstick smudges until it is practically gone, instead all over Katsuki and Kiri’s cocks. 

Just as you feel like you can’t take much more, you feel a hand come behind your neck to grip your hair, pulling your head back to look into two golden irises. “You like this, don’t you?” Katsuki growls. “You like being used by us?” You slowly nod, still choking on cock. “You ain’t seen nothin’ yet, kitty cat. And stop suckin’ ‘cause I don’t want to cum down your throat.” 

He slides out of your mouth with a groan, his cock now sobbing wet with your spit. “Mmm, same here,” Kiri moans, sliding his dick out of your fist. “Her throat feels so damn good, but I wanna feel how tight her other hole is.” 

You gape at them, shook. They don’t seriously believe…but they can’t! You’re still too sensitive! And they’re just too big! You could barely fit them in your mouth! “W-Wait,” you stutter. “I don’t think–“ 

“Don’t be scared, cutie,” Kiri shushes you, pressing a finger to your lips. “We’ll prep you real good before we fuck you into the couch and you take our knots. Gotta make sure you’re soaked for us.” 

And they do. You have to hand it to them: they know how to treat a pussy. They once again spread your legs wide and eat your pussy until you cum again all over them, their tongues slurping up everything you give them. They take turns, Kiri holding your legs open by your ankles while Katsuki tongue fucks you, and vice versa. When your pussy is finally nice and slick, and twitching for your second orgasm, the moment of truth has finally come. 

Kiri goes first. He sits back on the couch, legs spread, and cock at attention for you. “Alright, baby girl,” he coos. He pats his lap, giving you a sexy, fanged smirk. “Come and sit right here. I’ll hold you up.” Though you’re nervous, you do as he says and position yourself above him. You place your hands securely on his shoulders and hover above his cock, biting your lip. 

Slowly, you begin to come down, Kiri’s hands on your hips to give you all the support you need. “That’s it,” he encourages, his body trembling with need. “Come down slowly on this dick. No need to rush.” Behind you, Katsuki growls impatiently, wet sounds filling your ears from him stroking his cock for you. “Ignore him,” Kiri whispers. “He’ll just have to wait.” 

You listen to him, not wanting to rush and hurt yourself. You take things as slowly as you can and breathe as you come down onto Kiri’s knotted cock. You both react immediately, him to the pleasure and you to the stretch. And fuck, is it a stretch! Kiri sounds the inches you take, face red and eyes clouded from the pleasure. “One,” he softly grunts. “Two…t-three…four…” 

He grips your hips tight as you slowly come down, your body shaking and gasps leaving your lips. “Almost there, cutie,” he coos. “Don't give up now. You’re being such a good slut for me and Katsuki.” He reaches down and rubs your clit for you, helping you become wetter to take his cock all the way. Though it helps, he still feels too big; too thick; too much. You’ve never felt so full. “F-Fuck!” you whine. “Too much! It’s too…much!” 

Even when you finally sit down onto his cock, it still feels like it’s too much. Before you realize it, you’ve taken the full twelve inches of his dick. “I told you you could do it,” he breathlessly chuckles. His hand comes down onto your asscheek, smacking it. “Now fuck this cock for me. Give Katsuki something to look at.” 

You start off slow, grinding your hips into him and rocking your clit against his pelvis. Then you begin to bounce once you’ve found your rhythm, causing your titties to bounce in his face and your ass to jiggle against his lap. The only coherent words that leave your lips are swears and of Kiri’s name as you bounce on his cock. You’ve never felt anything like this before. This feeling only becomes more intense when Kiri lifts you up by your ass and lifts his pelvis to fuck you from underneath you. 

His thrusts are slow but deliberate and intense, nailing your G-spot again and again. You wrap your arms around him tight and moan into his ear, unable to hold onto your sanity anymore. You then feel Katsuki push and grind his cock up against your ass for some relief, slowly becoming crazy with the thought of feeling you wrapped around him too. “C’mon, shitty hair,” he groans impatiently. “Fuck her faster. I’m tired of waiting to fill that hole too.” 

Kiri chuckles at his partner as he continues to fuck you jackhammer style. “Patience–fuck–, man,” he huffs. “She’s really–fuck, baby–loving this. Aren’t you, kitty?” He turns to you and presses an openmouthed kiss to your lips, his tongue swirling with yours. When he pulls away, a string of saliva connects to your bottom lips, making you even wetter. 

Eventually, he does begin to fuck you harder, holding your wrists together behind your back with one hand while his other palms at your ass. Wet sounds of his cock plunging in and out of your sobbing, wet pussy fill the air along with the sound of skin slapping against skin and your moans, huffs, and whines of pleasure. Before you can even realize it, your third orgasm of the night is arriving like a train in the night, headed all full speed. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” you scream. “Oh, my God, I’m gonna fuckin’ cum!” 

“Do it then,” Kiri grunts, still pounding into you like it’s the last time he’ll be able to do so. “Do it and take all of my cum, kitty cat. Deep, deep, inside you…” And then he finally does so, spraying your insides with his cum while you cream all over his cock, dripping down his balls. He cums with a mixture of growls and moans while you let out a loud, high whine that rips from your chest. He holds you down onto him, making you take his knot and all of his cum until he is finally drained of every ounce of it. “So much,” he sighs. “And you took all of it. Such a good girl.” 

He presses a kiss to your lips before lifting you off of him. His knotted cock is shining with your juices while your pussy leaks with his cum, so much so that it drips down your thighs. You are exhausted and winded, your body heaving and twitching from the roughness of his fucking. 

“My turn,” Katsuki grunts, already grabbing you and positioning you into all fours. You squeak, looking back at him in a panic. He rolls his eyes at you. “Relax, I’ll go slow first. I’m a werewolf, not a barbarian.” 

Before you can say anything more, he is sliding balls deep into your sensitive, sore, cum-filled pussy with all of the intention of making it even more sore and filling you up again. He begins to fuck you then, one hand dripping your breast while the other rests on your hip. Your mouth falls open as his pelvis bounces against your ass, his balls swinging against your clit. “Oh, my God,” you whine tearfully. “P-Please…t-too much! I’m s-so…so…” 

“Sensitive?” Katsuki cackles, licking his lips at how cute you are. Such an adorable, plump little slut getting fucked silly on his cock. “I know. That will make this even better. I can’t wait to make this pussy cum again.” He then goes a little faster, building up speed and enjoying the way your plump ass bounces and jiggles against his pelvis. “Can’t wait to feel you cream all over this knot, just the way a slut like you should.” 

And then he goes even faster. Harder. The man is practically railing you as he fucks you into the couch in front of Kiri. You lose the last bit of self control and sanity you have at this point, succumbing to the life of a cum slut for the werewolves. You’ve never been fucked so hard in your life. “Oh, my God!” you scream. “Oh, my God!” And at some point, you think you really see him. 

Kiri stands on his knees in front of you now, his semi-hard knot in your face. “You’re so loud, baby,” he chuckles. “Guess we need to plug up this hole too.” As your wobbly lips open, he plunges his cock into your mouth and begins to slide it against your tongue. “That’s it, take these cocks, kitty cat,” he grunts in time with Katsuki’s thrusts. “You’re doing such a good job being our little cum sleeve. Our little cockslut.” 

“That’s so fucking hot,” Katsuki growls, gripping your hips so hard that he may leave bruises along your skin. “If you’re gonna say shit like that then you’d better such that mouth for something else too.” Kiri smirks over at the blonde, lust in his eyes. “Well, since you’re suggesting…” 

Their moans silence for a moment, muffled by their wet-sounding, passionate kissing as they fuck your holes from both sides. This only makes you wetter and brings you closer to your fourth orgasm of the night. You know that after this, you can’t do another round. Tears of desperation prick your eyes as you begin to bounce yourself back onto Katsuki’s cock, needing to cum. “I’m gonna cum!” you whine around Kiri’s cock. “I’m gonna cum again! Please, please make me cum!” 

“Then admit it,” Katsuki growls. 

You look back at him and blink wildly, confused. “What?” 

“Admit that you love being yours. That you love being a cum slut for us.” His hand comes around your throat to squeeze, his eyes flashing. “Say it!” he demands, his voice coming out in a low growl. 

“I love it!” you desperately shout. “I love being a cum slut for you! Please, please, please make me cum and fill me up! I need you, daddies!” 

Katsuki and Kiri each share a look. A look that is possessive and wanton. A look that says, “Yeah…she’s definitely ours now.” “Those were the magic words, kitty cat,” Kiri coos, lifting your chin to peck your lips. “Now cum for us.” 

Katsuki begins to pound your pussy into the couch, ramming you so hard that your orgasm slams into you before your brain can process it. “Gonna cum, little kitty,” he growls. “Gonna fill you up! Fucking take it!” And you do. You have no choice. His orgasm is explosive and he cums with a growl-like roar, his cum filling you up as you cream all over his knot. Your eyes roll into the back of your head and a sob leaves your lips, all energy pulled from your body instantly. 

“Goood giiiirl,” Kiri coos, stroking your hair. “You took another load of cum just like that! Such a good fucking kitty!” He is so proud of you watching you shiver and shake all over Katsuki’s cock. Katsuki slowly pulls out, giving them both a look at the mixture of his and Kiri’s cum dripping out of your twitching pussy lips that they have fucked red. “Look at all of that,” Katsuki huffs, rolling his eyes. “Now we’ll have to clean the couch off.” 

Once he pulls out, you feel empty. And so, so tired. You can’t stop yourself from falling face first into the couch between them, feeling like you just ran a marathon around the world. 

“We’ll do that later,” Kiri sternly replies. His voice sounds muffled like he’s speaking underwater. “First we have to worry about our little kitty here.” You feel his breath fan your face and his hand gently caressing your cheek. “Y/N?” he whispers. “Can you hear us, baby?” 

You don’t know. You don’t know anything anymore. They fucked all logic out of you. All you want now is sleep. You want your bed. “Home,” you mumble. “Sleepy…Wanna…go home…” Kiri shushes you gently, stroking your hair away from your sweaty brow. “We’ll take you home, sugar,” he hushes you. “But let’s get you cleaned up first.” 

You then feel Katsuki scooping you up off of the couch, cradling you against his broad, toned chest. Some time later, you then feel warm water surrounding you from above and the wolves pressed against you as they wash your body. The scent of warm vanilla fills your nose and your fingers touch muscles as you lean against the wolves’ big bodies. 

Next, you feel Kiri’s arms around you this time as he carries you out of the shower and then soft bedsheets. You open your eyes slightly, barely slits, to see the men standing at the foot of the bed. Then suddenly, they change. Now they are full on furry, four-legged wolves, glowing eyes blinking at you in the dark bedroom. You don’t react at first, but when they start to surround the bed, you begin to whimper in fear. 

Kiri shushes you as he climbs into the bed next to you, gently licking your hand. His tongue is rough and long. He then lays on his side beside you, his furry tale curling around your foot while Katsuki takes a seat at your feet, laying on his stomach and staring at you. Kiri presses his nose to your ear, his hot breath fanning in your face as sleep comes closer and closer to eating away at the darkness behind your lids. “Rest, baby,” he whispers. “It’s okay, Y/N.” 

“Y/N.” 

“Y/N!” 

You startle awake at the sound of your name being yelled. You have no idea where you are at first as you look around the room. Though it looks familiar, you can’t place it. Your mind is too muddled to do so. 

What you realize first is that you’re in your bed. You can tell by how soft the duvet is. When your eyes finally register, you look around the bedroom and realize that you’re in your room. Your apartment. But…how? You look down at yourself, finding yourself in your costume from last night, your shoes off. “What the fuck?” you whisper. How did you get here? When did you get here? 

Several loud knocks come from outside your door, making your heart leap. “Y/N, open the door!” Mina yells like a madwoman from outside. You scramble to get out of bed, hissing slightly at the soreness of your muscles. “H-Hang on,” you call out. “I’m coming!” 

You hurry to your front door without first checking out your appearance, examining the living room as you do. Nothing is out of place. The windows aren’t open nor shattered like someone broke in. It is as you left it last night before heading to Denki’s party. 

Ignoring the roiling in your gut, yu fling open the door to find Mina looking very worried. “God, there you are!” she gasps. She throws herself at you, wrapping her arms around you. “I’ve been calling you since last night! You never got in your Uber last night, so I called the front desk to your apartment and the clerk said he never saw you come in!” 

You blink dumbly at her, letting the information process in your foggy mind. So you never came home last night. So last night did happen! ‘Did it?’ you find yourself thinking. Even now, you can’t quite remember. “How did you…get here?” you ask Mina, your brain still sluggish and confused. 

Mina stares at you, dumbfounded. “What?” she scoffs. “I drove here. I spent the night at Denki’s and sobered up after he convinced me to stay and wait for you to call. We were all freaking out, looking for you! Where the hell have you been?” 

“I…” You want to tell her you don’t know. You also want to tell her that you think you saw something last night. Or rather, somethings. Creatures. But you just can’t get to that part. You remember getting lost in the woods and getting caught in the rain, but…then what? What happened after that? Did you ever find the road? Did you walk home? No, impossible. You would’ve never done that. 

You know something happened, but you can’t remember what. It’s like an inch you can’t scratch. A puzzle piece you can’t find the space for. When you close your eyes, you see flashes of fangs and glowing eyes, startling you.

You decide to keep it to yourself and hug Mina. “I guess I just crashed last night,” you nimbly reply. “I’m so sorry, Mina. I didn’t mean to scare you.” 

Mina hugs you back tightly, giving you a sense of reality. “Just as long as you’re safe,” she sighs. 

You close your eyes again and see two smiles with glinting, sharpened teeth. “Yeah,” you say, not truly believing it. “I’m safe now.” 

THE END.

[c-e-d-dreamer]

'Tis The Damn Season - Part Three

A/N: Man, don't you hate it when you're two idiots clearly still in love with each other, but unable to properly talk about your feelings? At least someone's getting action in this cabin this weekend 😉 Hope everyone enjoys, especially the beloved bestie @xxvalkyriesxx! I know I'll be enjoying #JailTime 😈 @acotargiftexchange

Read on AO3 // Previous Part // Next Part

Nesta scoops a spoonful of sugar from the glass dish, pouring it into her mug and stirring it into her tea. She carries her mug into the large living room of the cabin. Someone started a fire before they all left, but Nesta still grabs a blanket from the wicker basket. She sets her tea down on the coffee table, curling up in one of the oversized armchairs with her book and the blanket draped over her legs.

She shifts until she’s really comfortable, eagerly opening her book to the last page she’d bookmarked. She’s more than ready to take advantage of the empty cabin for the day, of the peace and quiet up here in the mountains. She’s more than ready for the main character of her book to stop fighting it and give in to the big, hunky duke that wants to give her the world. She’s more than ready for a distraction from the thoughts of the previous night that have been vying for her attention all morning.

She hates to admit it, but last night was some of the best sleep she’s had in a while. Although, maybe it shouldn’t be that surprising. She used to always love staying at Cassian’s apartment or convincing him to stay the night at hers, and not just because he would make her breakfast in the morning. There was a comforting safety wrapped within the circle of his arms, and his big body was always so warm. And even though she often grumbled, she really didn’t mind when he’d sleep almost fully on top of her. It was like her own personal weighted and heated blanket.

And she hates to admit it, but she misses it. Misses him.

Nesta isn’t sure if she imagined it or not, but last night, she swore she could feel Cassian’s arms curled tightly around her waist. That she could feel the warm weight of him pressed along her spine and seeping beneath her skin. That she could feel his nose buried in her hair and his soft breaths fanning across her ear. But was it real or was it the dream of a memory still tied like a golden thread around her heart?

“Hey, Nes.”

Nesta’s head snaps up at the greeting, surprised to find Cassian standing in front of the french doors that lead out to the cabin’s back patio, a stack of firewood cradled in his arms. She can do nothing but watch as he steps out of his snow covered boots, as he pads across the room and toward the large, stone fireplace. He kneels down, taking one of the logs and tossing it onto the fire, the flames crackling and growing in response.

“Aren’t you supposed to be skiing with the others?” Nesta finally asks, sitting up straighter and closing her book.

“You don’t have to do that,” Cassian says, not even looking her way as he sets the remaining logs in the rack beside the fireplace.

“Do what?”

Cassian sighs softly, pushing back to his feet and wiping his hands on his jeans. “It’s just me. You can relax. You don’t have to worry about donning that mask you always wear.”

Nesta has to swallow hard against his words. Leave it to Cassian to still see straight through her, even after all their time apart. It used to terrify her, the way he seemed to see all the way down to her very soul, the way he was intent on peeling back every piece of armor, on squeezing past every defense she’d so carefully laid until he’d wiggled his way right into her heart.

It terrifies her now that he’s still never really left.

“You didn’t answer my question,” Nesta deflects instead.

“I broke my ankle earlier this year.”

Nesta frowns at the explanation, her attention instantly darting down toward Cassian’s ankles, looking for any sign of injury or discomfort. “I didn’t know that…”

“Don’t worry. It’s all healed now. I even finished PT already,” Cassian assures her, moving to settle on the sofa perpendicular to Nesta’s armchair. “But I figured it’s best not to risk anything on the slopes.”

Nesta hums softly in response, but she’s not really sure what else to say. Things are so stilted and awkward between her and Cassian now. His fingerprints used to be tattooed across her skin, the crack of his smile used to bring light to her shittiest and darkest days, his laugh used to be her safety net and the space between his ribs her home, and now they’re… this.

There’s too many emotions tangled between them, a heavy ache that settles deep in Nesta’s bones and a yearning that still pierces through her heart. Too messy, too many unsaid words, and with every second of silence that passes, those words only seem more intent on cloying up her throat and choking her, the tension scraping hard against her skin.

And the two of them are now stuck inside, just the two of them together, for the rest of the day.

Perhaps this is the weekend where Nesta finally decides to give skiing a proper try again.

“So what are you reading?” Cassian breaks the quiet.

“What?”

“The book you’re reading, what’s it about?”

“You want to talk about my book?” Nesta asks, her tone dry.

Cassian chuckles softly, pushing a hand up and through his hair, a nervous tick he still hasn’t quite kicked it seems. “Well, I doubt you want me to ask how you’ve been.”

“Why do we have to talk at all?”

Cassian shrugs at that, settling back against the cushions of the sofa, so Nesta decides to return to her book after all. But it’s easier said than done. She tries to focus on the ink splashed across the pages, tries to focus on the words and the characters and the story. But they all just blur together, that needling voice in the back of her mind continuing to draw her attention toward the man sitting a mere foot away from her, the eyes she can feel watching her.

“Fine,” Nesta says, snapping her book closed again. “How have you been?”

“Now you want to do small talk?”

“We’re stuck here until everyone returns from the slopes, so unless you have any better ideas…”

Cassian hums, as though he’s really thinking about it, before he reaches toward the coffee table in front of him. He pulls open one of the drawers, rooting around until he produces a deck of cards and a handful of plastic spoons stored there. He slides the cards out of the packaging, and Nesta is transfixed watching the way his hands move, the way his fingers flex, as he shuffles them. Somehow, the large span of his hands make the cards look small.

“Well?” Cassian asks, tearing Nesta free from her spiraling thoughts and gesturing to the space across from him.

“You can’t play Spoons with two people.”

“Says who?”

Nesta rolls her eyes, but she stands up, dragging her armchair until it’s across from Cassian, getting comfortable again with her blanket. Cassian’s grin grows, and he shuffles the deck of cards in his hands one last time before divvying up four cards for each of them. Nesta quickly snatches up her hand, taking a moment to arrange her cards in numerical order. Not the best start, a two, a six, a jack, and a queen.

“So how did you break your ankle?” Nesta asks, reaching forward to take the card Cassian slides toward her. An ace of spades. It becomes the start of the discard pile.

Cassian chuckles, deciding to add the next card he draws to his hand and sliding a new card toward Nesta. “How do you think?”

“Something stupid, then.”

“Mor got this new dog, a tiny little chihuahua thing she named Bella. And it hates me, genuinely despises me.” Nesta can’t help but laugh at his words, but Cassian’s grin only grows in response, the hazel of his eyes surprisingly sparking despite his words. “I’m serious. The dog planned the whole thing. It purposefully got under my feet and tripped me.”

“You’re clearly giving that dog too much credit,” Nesta tells him, trying to keep her face neutral even as she picks up another jack, trading the two in her hand for the card.

“Maybe I was always just meant to be a cat person.”

Nesta can’t help but think back to the afternoon date Cassian took her on to the small cat cafe downtown. Can’t help but think about the tuxedo kitten that had climbed onto Cassian’s shoulder and chewed at his hair while he laughed. Can’t help but think about how small that kitten had looked curled up to nap in the cradle of Cassian’s large hands. Can’t help but think about the promise they made to each other, to go back and adopt that kitten once they moved in together.

“Maybe…” Nesta agrees quietly, focusing hard on the cards in her hand.

Cassian clears his throat awkwardly, turning his own attention to his cards, and Nesta wonders if his memories have carried him back to that same afternoon too. Carried him back to the way the rays of the sun spilled through the cafe’s windows, the sweet scent of coffee and cakes, to soft fur beneath fingertips and promises just for them.

“Are you still working at the same firm?” Cassian asks after a moment, trading another card in his hand and sliding it toward her.

“Not anymore. I took an offer from a different firm. Better pay, more interesting work. I’ve really been enjoying it.”

“That’s great. I’m really happy for you.”

The sincerity of his voice is enough to draw Nesta’s attention back to his face, and her breath almost catches in her throat when she finds Cassian’s gaze already pinned on her. With the firelight dancing in his eyes, there’s no mistaking the greens and golds that make up the hazel. No mistaking the honesty, the emotions, swimming in those eyes.

Nesta opens her mouth, but she quickly closes it again, not quite sure what to say. She wants to hate the way her chest starts to tighten, brambled vines twisting tighter and tighter around her heart. But there’s no denying the emotion that wells up her throat, those unsaid words weighing heavy on her tongue and her mind again.

“You have to draw, to keep the game going,” Nesta points out instead.

Cassian laughs softly again, his lips twisting up into that lopsided, cocksure smirk of his, as he raises his hand, a plastic spoon poised between his fingers. For a moment, Nesta can do nothing but blink, her mind not quite catching up to what she’s seeing. She snaps her attention back down to the coffee table, and sure enough, the spoon next to the discard pile and stack of cards is gone.

“What?”

“You didn’t even notice,” Cassian teases, turning around the cards in his other hand to show four eights. “I win.”

Nesta scowls, tossing her own hand of cards on the table. “This is exactly why you can’t play Spoons with two people.”

“Still always a sore loser, Nes?”

“I am not being a sore loser. It’s a simple fact.”

“If you say so…”

“Fine,” Nesta huffs, narrowing her eyes and shoving all the cards back toward Cassian. “Best two out of three, then.”

She waits for Cassian to gather up the cards, to shuffle them again and deal them a fresh round of four cards, but instead, he merely continues to watch her. His smirk twists into a soft smile, his whole expression one that Nesta used to know like the back of her hand, one that Nesta hasn’t seen directed at her in a long time.

“What?” she asks quietly, feeling almost self conscious beneath that soft fondness.

Cassian shakes his head, finally gathering up the cards and beginning to shuffle them. “Nothing… just… that look…”

I’ve named every single one of your looks and poses, you know.

Those were the words he spoke to her once. She never knew exactly how many of her expressions he’d cataloged. She never knew what his names were for each one. She never knew exactly which one was his favorite, though he did claim to have one. Was it the one she was giving him now?

“No cheating this time,” Nesta tells him, reaching forward for the four cards he placed in front of her, desperate to ease that tension that keeps rising and falling between them like waves.

“Not exactly beating the sore loser accusations, sweetheart,” Cassian offers, picking up his own cards and taking a moment to arrange them to his liking. “Besides, do you really think I'd cheat?”

“Well, it wouldn't be the first time you've lied to me.”

Despite her attempt at keeping her tone light and teasing, the silence that follows her remark is palpable. Clearly, she’s hit her mark, that festering wound torn back open. It’s the subject they’ve been tip-toeing around all weekend, the subject that Nesta has tried and failed to cover up for months despite its persistence. Like wine stained red across fabric.

“I deserve that, I suppose,” Cassian finally concedes. “Does that mean we’re finally going to talk about it?”

“I don’t see what there is to talk about.”

“You never let me explain, let me tell you why I never said anything before that night.”

Nesta sniffs, crossing her arms across her chest. “What was there to explain? I know why you did it. Caught dating Feyre’s awful big sister, how embarrassing that must have been for you.”

“I don’t know what’s worse, that you think so lowly of me or that you think so lowly of yourself,” Cassian drawls, his voice bitter and dry.

It’s close. Too close.

“Draw a card, Cassian.”

“No.” Cassian sets his cards down on the table, the gesture filled with as much finality as his voice. “I’m not going to sit here and have awkward small talk and pretend while we play cards.”

Nesta raises a derisive eyebrow. “Who’s the sore loser now?”

“Nice try, Nes. That type of baity deflection might work on your sisters, but I know you too well.” He sighs softly, scrubbing a hand down his face and across the stubble on his jaw. “I didn’t know. I really didn’t know when we first met.”

Nesta sighs as well, placing her own cards down on the table. “But you knew before the dinner that night. It’s why you were acting so weird that day.”

“I know, but it took longer than you think. I didn’t start to realize until the night you told me everything about your past, your family. It was just too much of a coincidence, the stories too close to what I’d heard about Feyre. But I didn’t know for sure until I went to Rhys’ for dinner after that. I pulled Feyre aside and finally asked her about the sisters she sometimes spoke of, asked what their names were.”

“And yet, you still didn’t say anything.”

“It was never the right time.” Nesta scoffs at that, so Cassian continues, “and I was selfish, okay? Is that what you want to hear? I was. I knew you’d be upset once you knew, knew it would change everything for us, so selfishly, I just kept putting it off longer and longer. I thought that I could keep you longer, but I… I just ended up losing you anyways.”

Nesta isn’t sure what she expected Cassian to say, but it certainly wasn’t that. Maybe some part of her expected him to turn it back on her, remind her that if she and her sisters weren’t such a tangled, complicated mess of parental issues and childhood scars that scabbed over but never truly healed, that they wouldn’t have had this problem in the first place. Maybe that cruel, whispering voice in the back of her mind had expected him to finally confirm her worst fears, that it was all a game, a trick, that he was embarrassed by her.

But to admit that he was selfish…

Nesta’s pride had certainly kept her from ever admitting those words.

Damn him and his open book honesty. Damn him and his bleeding heart that he holds so confidently outside his chest. No icy walls to keep it tucked safely away. Instead, it sits beating and bleeding in the palm of his hand, stretched out toward her like he has such blind faith in the world. Such blind faith in her.

“Wow. I’ve finally struck you completely silent. That has to be a first.”

“I don’t know what you expect me to say.”

“Go on,” Cassian coaxes, his tone almost mocking as he leans forward in his seat. “Tell me I was selfish. Remind me that it’s all my fault. Tell me how your life is so much better now without me.”

“Now who’s thinking so lowly of the other?”

Cassian sighs softly, finally dropping his gaze away from her. He pushes almost aimlessly at his abandoned stack of cards on the table, as though he’s trying to gather his thoughts, trying to find the right words to say. Trying to gather his courage.

“Do you think y–”

A crash sounds from the front entryway of the cabin, cutting off whatever words Cassian was going to say. Nesta snaps her attention in that direction, just in time to watch Eris and Azriel all but stumble into the room, limbs tangled together and Azriel’s hands already pushing open Eris’s Ralph Lauren ski jacket. Both their cheeks are flushed, but Nesta isn’t convinced the coloring is just from the cold and the snow outside.

Cassian clears his throat loudly, and both men freeze, clearly completely oblivious to the other occupants of the room. Azriel is quick to step away from Eris, to put distance between them, but the illusion is long broken, and Nesta doesn’t believe the too casual stance, the cool and aloof mask, for a second.

“Shouldn’t you both be skiing?” Eris asks, raising a single eyebrow.

Nesta scoffs and rolls her eyes. “I don’t ski.”

“I broke my ankle a few months back,” Cassian offers with a shrug. “But how were the slopes?”

“Pretty good, actually. It’s a damn shame the sun sets so early this far north.”

“The other won’t be long behind us,” Azriel cuts in to add, turning and walking toward the kitchen. “I’m sure everyone will be hungry after a day on the slopes.”

Nesta snorts at Azriel all but fleeing the room, knowing damn well he’s not going to be preparing everyone lunch despite his excuse. She shares a pointed look with Eris, but the redhead seems unfazed by the actions of his boyfriend-not-boyfriend. Still, with Azriel leaving, silence settles heavily over the room again, pressing against Nesta’s skin and the reopened wounds until it stings.

She catches movement out of the corner of her eye, turning to watch Cassian push up and to his feet. He seems to hesitate for a moment, his own gaze meeting Nesta’s, hazel eyes burning low in the firelight. His lips part, and Nesta holds her breath, waiting to hear the words clearly weighing heavy on the back of his tongue, but they never come. Instead, Cassian shakes his head, seemingly thinking better of it. Instead, he follows the same path as his brother toward the kitchen, leaving that thread between them untouched, too taut under the weight of what they used to be.

Nesta finishes twisting the strands of her hair into a simple, soft braid, tying it off and letting it drop along her shoulder. She gathers up her small toiletries bag and the towel she’s been given for the weekend, switching off the bathroom light and padding back down the hallway. She’s surprised to find the door to her guest bedroom already closed, distinctly remembering leaving it open before she went to do her nighttime routine, but her confusion quickly morphs into annoyance when the distinct sound of a moan filters through the wood.

“I’ll help with cooking.”

~ * * * ~

“Eris, I’m going to kill you,” Nesta grumbles half to herself.

“Kicked out again?”

Nesta spins on her heel to find Cassian leaning against the doorjamb to his own room. He’s already changed as well, a soft-worn pair of flannel pajama bottoms hanging low on his hips, showing off and drawing attention to the hard cut of his v lines. She’s half tempted to tell him to put on a shirt; although, she’s not sure she really wants to. Not with the way his crossed arms add to the bulge of his arms. Not with the way the shadows cut into every line, deepen every swirling stroke of ink across his skin.

“I’m beginning to think this is all just a ploy by Azriel to get a proper bed for the weekend.”

“Probably. The pull-out is pretty lumpy,” Cassian offers with an easy shrug. “My offer from last night still stands for tonight though. You’re still welcome to crash in my room.”

Nesta knows that she should tell him no. She knows that she should turn and walk away, that she should resign herself to spending the night on one of the uncomfortable sofas. Especially after their conversation from earlier. Their unfinished conversation from earlier. There’s still too much tension, too many words left unsaid, brewing like an oncoming storm between them, threatening to strike them both down like a bolt of lightning.

But maybe there really is too much still between her and Cassian despite all this time. Maybe they’re still a tangled mess of golden thread tied so tightly around their hearts that it never leaves, only bruises and scars. Or maybe Nesta truly is just so exhausted and the idea of a proper bed too tempting. Because she steps around Cassian and inside his guest bedroom.

She hears the soft snick of the door as Cassian closes it, moving to set the things in her arms down where she’ll remember them in the morning. She can hear the slow shuffle as he seems to move about the room, but she can’t quite bring herself to look. Can’t quite bring herself to face him. Instead, she merely makes her way to the bed and slips beneath the blankets, tucking them up to her shoulders.

The bed dips behind her as Cassian settles as well, the warmth he always seems to exude seeping across the space between them beneath the blankets. It’s almost second nature, the way Nesta scoots back closer, chasing that warmth. A soft click and the room is blanketed in darkness as the bedside lamp is turned off. It’s like a safety net, that darkness, and Nesta dares to roll over in the bed.

She supposes she shouldn’t be surprised to find Cassian with his eyes still open and watching her. The moonlight spilling in through the window cuts a bright line across his cheekbone, along his nose. And a strand of curly hair tumbles down along his temple and across his forehead, Nesta curling her fingers into a fist in the blankets to keep from the temptation to brush it aside.

“There were surprisingly no drinking games tonight,” Cassian breaks the quiet, the corner of his lips twisting up in the barest hint of a teasing smile. “Do you think our family is losing their touch?”

“That or this is finally a sign that we’re all getting old.”

“You calling me old, Nes?”

“I do think I can see a few grey hairs.”

Cassian’s laugh is surprisingly soft, but still warm, practically curling around Nesta’s limbs like a second blanket. “We could play a game right here and right now.”

Nesta rolls her eyes, but she presses her lips together to hold back a smile. “I’m pretty sure that is the opposite of the no funny business promise.”

“If you’re scared, sweetheart, just say.”

“Fine. Truth or dare?”

“Truth.”

Nesta doesn’t bother biting back her scoff. “You went through all that just to pick truth?”

“I’m cozy,” Cassian argues, making a big show of burrowing deeper beneath the blankets and offering her a winning grin. “I don’t want to move.”

Nesta rolls her eyes, but she nibbles on her bottom lip and tries to think of a good truth. Tries to think of a question she really wants to ask him, really wants the answer to. A few spring immediately to mind, a warm whisper tugging at her thoughts. Perhaps…

Maybe it’s the safety of the quiet and the dark, the perfect hiding place for whispered truths and honesty. Maybe it’s the safety of the blanket wrapped around them as surely as that thread between their hearts. Maybe it’s the way the teasing between them is so reminiscent of the way they were before, of so many nights just like this, tangled up together in bed.

“If we didn’t break up,” Nesta begins, keeping her voice barely above a whisper. “Where do you think we’d be right now?”

Cassian’s eyebrows dip slightly, and Nesta can tell it’s not a question he was expecting, what he was anticipating her to ask. She wonders briefly if he’ll answer honestly or if he’ll fall back into that mask of easy grins and teasing remarks he so often wears.

“I think… I think we’d still be right here, celebrating Feyre.” Cassian pauses, his lips parting before he closes them again, swallowing down whatever words he was going to say. “But… I think I’d have begged you to agree to marry me by now.”

“Begged?”

“Would you have accepted anything less?” Cassian’s chuckle is soft and almost breathless, the corner of his eyes crinkling. “Truth or dare?”

Nesta doesn’t bother biting back her smirk. “Dare.”

Even in the dark, the way Cassian’s eyes spark is unmistakable, his grin growing wider still. The sight leaves Nesta’s breath catching, her traitorous heart twisting between her ribs. It’s almost involuntary the way she moves closer still across the bed, pulled into that gravity, his warmth, that look on his face. It’s almost involuntary the way her gaze drops to his mouth, to the way his lips pinch as he makes a big show of thinking.

“I dare you to…”

Kiss me.

“Finally forgive me.”

The words are jarring enough that Nesta is sure that she must have misheard him. But when she focuses properly back on Cassian’s face, that smile of his is long gone. Instead, his expression is… guarded. It seems odd, practically unnatural, to see such an expression on Cassian’s face, especially directed toward her. And it stings, niggling like icy fingers around Nesta’s lungs and squeezing, digging its claws straight into her already bruised heart.

She thinks she might hate it.

“Sorry. Gods, I’m so sorry,” Cassian says suddenly, shoving the blankets off his body and clambering up and off the bed. “I don’t know what I was…”

Cassian doesn’t finish the thought, shaking his head and shoving a hand up and through his hair. He won’t quite meet Nesta’s eye, scrambling around the room until he locates a hoodie, quickly tugging it on. His name sits heavy on the tip of Nesta’s tongue, but she can’t seem to bring herself to say it, can do nothing but watch as he moves about the room and then toward the door.

“I’m sorry,” Cassian mutters one last time, and Nesta swears his voice sounds thick, as though he’s holding back tears.

The sound of the door opening and closing again is too loud in the dark of the bedroom. Too final. And it’s more than just the loss of Cassian’s large, warm body in the bed that has cold needling beneath Nesta’s skin, burrowing all the way down to her bones, to her soul. She curls her knees up to her chest, wrapping her arms around her legs and staring at the door, at the space Cassian once filled.

With every moment that passes, the silence presses in harder around her, her heart sinking deeper until the ache between her ribs is palpable. Until she can do nothing but speak the truth to the empty room.

“I already forgave you.”

—

2025 tag list (let me know if you want to be added or removed; bolded names mean Tumblr won’t let me tag you 🥲): @moodymelanist @sv0430 @bookstantrash @hiimheresworld @sweet-pea1 @emeriethevalkyriegirl @pyxxie @dustjacketmusings @hallway5 @glowing-stick-generation @goddess-aelin @melphss @a-trifling-matter @blueunoias @wolfnesta @jmoonjones @burningsnowleopard @whyisaravenlike-awritingdesk @that-little-red-head @kale-theteaqueen @superflurry @lady-winter-sunrise @freakingata @susanbanarchy @jsmelodies @unhealthyfanobsession @presskmewleroux @nativeswfl @livinforthetea @dying-of-wanderlust @berkskc @the-new-ribbon @underneath-the-sidras @deadandsane

[itsscromp]

Going to the beach with the 141?

Beach day

And just in time for summer too :D Word count:1.5K

With summer now finally here and the weather starting to warm up, Laswell has awarded all of you two months off for your hard work. But what should you all do ?? Y/n may have just the idea for everyone.

"Hey you guys know how we have two months right ??"

"Why ??" Simon was curious.

"Yes, I remember it very clearly y/n" Price said.

"Well, maybe I thought we could rent out a cabin for a month and head down to the beach or something" You said enthusiastically.

"Walk into the sun... On purpose ??" Simon did not like the sun whatsoever, yes he said his skin was impeccable bronze, but that's just around the eyelids.

"That's the point I guess ??"

"Well that's a nice idea Y/n, That would be good for us to get out" He immediately got out his phone and looked through some BnB's

"See Simon, Price agrees"

"I still don't get why you'd want to be outside of your own free will"

"Well one it's healthy and two it gives you fresh air" You snickered.

"Did I hear a beach day in here ??" Johnny heard as he walked in, as someone mentioned beach, golden retriever mode is now activated.

"Yeah, I suggested we rented a cabin for the month near there" You caught him up.

"Oooo !!! Price you should listen to them" He gave an enthusiastic smile. "That's a good idea, Have ya heard ?? Are we going captain ??" He was so damn ready and the thing wasn't even organised.

He then found the perfect BnB for all of you to stay in and it was within the price range. "Then it's settled, We're heading to the beach" He looked at you all smiling.

"What's going on here ??" Gaz walked in, hearing soap's cheering and excitement.

"We're going to the beach !!!"

"Nice, sounds like fun !!" He smiled a little.

But Simon was not budging, he didn't want to go outside and feel the sun, risking more tan on his skin among other things. "I'll stay behind"

"Aw come on, It'll be fun" You tried to convince him.

"I'll watch the base for price, Who's going to take care of-"

"Simon, No, your coming with us" Price affirmed him in a loving dad way.

"Pleaaaaaaaassssssssseeeeeee" You and Johnny tried.

"You can't convince me" He eyed both of you.

"Yes I can"

"No you can't"

"Oh yeah ?? What if I told you there was an open bar on the beach ??" Johnny tried to add.

"Well... Do you think I'm just an alcoholic ??" But you could tell it was working, Time to sweeten the deal.

"Or you can toss soap in the water with the sharks or trap him in a pile of sand so he has to walk back with sand in his ass"

"Well, That does sound pretty enticing" He showed crows feet on one eye, indicating a smirk.

"GHOST !!!" Offended scotsman bestie noises.

"Alright you sold me" He finally agreed.

'Hell yeah !!" You fist bumped the air.

"I thought we were bros...." He was hurt, like a kicked puppy. "I'll get you both back, just you wait !!"

"Sure Johnny sure" You both snickered.

"Alright, I got the place booked, Go get packed then, we leave tomorrow morning. Giant children the lot of you" Price clicked his tongue.

Soon the morning of the trip arrived and you began double-checking the items you had packed. "Ok, shirt's check, pants check"

"I got my stuff" Gaz slung his duffle bag over his shoulder.

Johnny was in tow behind him with a big backpack "Ready !!"

You were a little baffled by how much he had in his backpack "Johnny what did you pack, Your entire room ??"

"No... I only brought my good clothes, comic books, drawing pad, journal, several pencils and a picture of my mom"

"Soooooo Your entire room" You smirked

"Well, Like 70% of my room, I can't fit the furniture" He joked. Simon walked down the hall with his duffle bag, ready to go as well.

"We're all packed captain" Gaz said

"Alright then, shall we head out ??"

"Onwards !!" Johnny bolted for the doors.

Everyone sorted out the car situation to figure out who was going with who, Johnny was a little saddened how he wasn't going with you and Simon. "Awww why can't I go with you guys"

"Cause the last time we did a road trip together, I had to clean out your car sickness the whole day, and the smell was still there for 3 days" You shuddered.

He pouted a little before obliging, the cars now on the road and off to the BnB, You and Simon chatting along the way. Finding a very old house that had tree's growing outside of it, something like out of the last of us.

"Wow, that's so freaking cool"

"Yeah... It's crazy what nature can do" He smiled a little, he liked car rides with you, it was one of the many peaceful times with you.

His phone dinged with a text from Price. "Price is at the next gas station, something about Johnny eating too many cheese curds and is currently throwing up"

"Tried to warn him" You chuckled.

"Poor Johnny, He's stupid though for eating those cheese curds"

"Oh I can Imagine" You shuddered

Soon the two of you arrived at the destination, Y/n finding the keys and heading inside. "Wow, this place is so cool in person"

"It is, check out the TV" Simon walked in and saw how big it was. He pulled out his phone and saw another text from Price. "They're on the road again. Johnny is still feeling a little uneasy, but he isn't throwing up anymore"

"Thank god for that, He's taking a shower as soon as he get's here"

Soon the others arrived and Johnny went for the shower, After which it was a rest afternoon for everyone, tomorrow It was the beach day.

So the next morning once everyone was rested and Johnny recovered, You all filled up on breakfast and got ready, Simon pulling you aside to slap a huge fuck ton of sunscreen on you.

"Hey hey easy" You chuckled as he slapped some on your back.

"Not on my watch" He was not letting melanoma get to his bestie !! Not now not ever.

Soon everyone began to walk to the beach as it was within walking distance, normally the beach was a little busy, but thankfully it wasn't today, so you guys technically had the beach all to yourselves, you set the shade up and the chairs, Johnny and Gaz immediately rushing for the water. Having water guns in the ready.

Price had his book ready to go as he sat down and kept his eyes on you 4 as well. You and Simon began to draw sketches into the sand.

"Ok, what's this ??" You pointed out your sand sketch

"Hmmmm........ A dragon ??" He tilted his head.

"Yeah, there we go !!" You smiled "Ok your turn"

Simon began to draw his sketch in the sand, It was a very complex drawing leaving you baffled.

"Ok.... Is it..... A dog ??"

"No"

After a little bit of guessing, Johnny called you over to take some photos of him to send to his wife, You snickered every time he flexed for the camera, eager to impress her. "Looking good supermodel" You snickered.

"Hey, it's for my one and only, she gets only the best" He smiled proudly.

"Ok I sent you the photos"

"Why don't you two come in the water ??" Gaz offered.

"No thanks, You three have fun" Simon said as he headed back for the shade to dump more sunscreen on him.

So you three began to wrestle in the water, Having the time of your lives, not a care in the world, Just you guys. Simon watched on as he sat in the shade, Price knowing him too well, sat up. "Why don't you join them ??"

"I don't know..." He still didn't want to get tanned. But another thing is he didn't know how to relax, He was so used to routine and planning so all of this was a little off-putting to him.

'I know it's a little hard son, But when do we be able to get to do something like this. Besides, Y/n is on the losing side from what I can see, I'm sure they can use your help" He chuckled softly before going back to his book.

He looked out into the water, Yes it looked like you were in a little trouble, So he sighed a little and got up, slipping his shirt off and heading to the water.

You looked and smiled. "Yeah Simon, Let's go !!"

Johnny and Gaz gulped as he rolled his shoulders and lightly flexed his chest. Soon the match began and how the tables turned, Ultimately by the end you and Simon being declared the winners.

"Well done" He smiled softly, raising his hand for a high five from you, To which you happily returned.

The sun began to set, A very fun-filled day for everyone, But Johnny sadly being the victim with sunburn and sand up his ass, But all in all a very fun day.

A/N: I'm so sorry for the lack of content as of lightly, I hope to try and be a bit more consistent.

Taglist: @callofdudes @cumikering

[wayward-dreamer]

Better Late Than Never

Square/s Filled: Snowed In @anyfandomfluffbingo | FREE @jacklesversebingo |

Pairing: Dean x F!Reader

Word count: 2,017

Summary: Dean and Y/N find themselves snowed in at Bobby's cabin. With a little whiskey and a cozy fire, it leaves Dean vulnerable to admit something to her he's been keeping to himself for some time.

Warnings: Minor angst, 99% fluff, brief mention of erotica.

A/N: I've had to forego tag lists as battling with dumblr isn't worth risking my mental health lol. So please go ahead and follow @wayward-dreamers-library and turn on notifications, if you want to read my stuff.

Anyway, I hope y'all enjoy this, because it's been a while since I've written a Dean one shot. Thanks to my besties and beta's @hintsofhoney and @makeadealwithdean for looking over this one! <3

Dean pushed the door open, the gust of chilly air causing it to hit the wall as he hurried inside, forcing it closed against the wind and shutting the cold out. He unwrapped the thick scarf from his neck, breathing heavily as the warmth from the fireplace in the living area thawed his frozen nose. He pulled the gloves off his hands and took off his leather jacket, hanging it up on the rack next to the door, before turning around, frowning at the quietness in the cabin.

“Y/N?”

Suddenly, he heard boots coming up the stairs from the basement, Y/N’s head appearing from the hatch followed by the rest of her, as she carried a big box in her hands.

“Hey,” she nodded at him as she set the box down on the dining table. “I hope you’re hungry for canned chicken soup because that’s all there was.”

“Well, as great as liquid salt in a can sounds,” he began with his signature sarcasm in place, “I got a few other things to eat, and something absolutely necessary to get through the next few days.”

He reached into one of the bags, pulling out two bottles of Bourbon, smirking as he placed them on the table. “We’re really livin’ it up here, huh?” he jested, chuckling.

“Oh yeah, it’s a real Four Seasons vibe,” she added, rolling her eyes as her laughter joined his.

“Called Bobby, told him we pulled in here and we’re gonna be staying until they clear the roads in the morning or the next,” he informed, taking out two glasses from the kitchen cabinets. “Said if we break anything, we owe him.”

“Sounds about right,” she muttered.

“So, looks like it’s just you and me,” he said, handing her a glass and cracking the seal on the bottle, pouring a generous amount into it. “Hope you don’t get sick of my face ‘cause there’s no tellin’ how long we’re gonna be here for.”

“As long as you don’t annoy me, I think we’re good,” she said, looking between her glass and him.

“Oh come on, where’s the fun in that?” he teased, smirking before he poured some bourbon for himself.

They clinked their glasses together before Y/N took a sip, turning away from him to avoid his gaze. Being in close proximity to Dean like this for God-only-knows-how-long was a dream scenario in her head. In reality, it was a nightmare. She had harbored feelings for him for longer than she cared to admit, and now being around him constantly until she finally got to leave was going to be incredibly difficult. She had to keep her bourbon intake low too; there was no telling what she would confess with too much of it in her system. She thought it was just a stupid crush she had from the first hunt they met on, something that would fade away soon enough. Then they kept meeting up, sometimes because a phone call from Sam would convince her to join them on a particular hunt, and other times by coincidence.

More cases led to more time around each other, until they became a pretty permanent part of each other’s lives. She’d even go as far as to say they were really good friends, which just made being in love with him even more complicated. Sam had been trying for a while now to get her to be part of their team, that it was better than her hunting alone, but she couldn’t do it.

Why torture herself with spending every single day in Dean’s presence when nothing was going to happen?

That was exactly what happened, however, when Sam got injured on a hunt and was resting up at Bobby’s. It had forced Dean to call her in on a vampire case, telling her he needed backup as the next was larger than he could take of on his own. The drive back to Bobby’s had been difficult, as the snow started falling harder, and they both knew they had to pull into his Montana cabin until the impending storm was over, as that was the closest place they could get to. It was five days and counting being alone with the man she had feelings for, and she wasn’t sure she’d survive it any longer. 

“I’m gonna keep outta your hair until dinner, I promise,” he proclaimed, walking past her. “How does 7 sound?”

“Sounds great,” she replied, smiling. “Thanks.”

“All good, sweetheart,” he smirked, turning on his boot to face her again. “Plus, I know you need some time with that dirty book in your duffle bag you think I don’t know about-”

“Dean!” she yelled as her eyes widened, her reflexes kicking in quickly as she picked up a couch cushion and hurled it at him.

He threw his head back as he guffawed, stumbling to catch the cushion in his hand and tossing it back on the couch. He shook his head as he continued to chuckle to himself, walking into the bedroom he’d be using and shut the door. She glared at the wooden barrier, dropping down on the sofa and taking a big sip of the amber liquid in her glass. She really had no desire to read her book now that it had been discovered.

At least she still had plenty of other fantasies to keep her company once she retreated to her room for the night.

“Fucking… piece of–son of a bitch,” Dean muttered under his breath, battling with the ancient TV antenna.

Y/N pressed her lips together to keep from laughing, her eyes squinting as the glare coming off the screen as the static black and white crackled. “It’s no use, Dean.”

“This is literally the only thing to do here other than research. I’m fixing this thing,” he grumbled, glaring at the antenna.

“I saw a deck of cards in one of the drawers,” she stated, pointing towards the kitchen.

“Fine,” he lamented.

He finally gave up, turning off the TV with a scowl on his face. He retrieved the deck from the kitchen and sat across from Y/N, shuffling them quickly before dealing them out between them.

“Care to make it interesting?” he asked, grinning as he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“If you’re thinking strip poker, you better think again, Winchester,” she countered, an unamused expression on her face.

He rolled his eyes, shaking his head. “You’re no fun, Y/N.”

“I know,” she giggled.

They played a few rounds of regular poker, with Dean winning the first round and then losing the next two. He grumbled as he handed his money over, but Y/N promised that she’d save it to buy drinks the next time they were at a bar. He stood up and put another log on the fire, before grabbing the bottle of bourbon and pouring some more for himself. He picked up her glass, which caused her to bite her lip, nervously. She knew she really shouldn’t, in fear that she might admit something she couldn’t if she had anymore to drink than she already had.

“Uh, Dean… I think I’m good,” she said, covering the glass with her hand.

“It’s not like we’re leaving any time soon,” he stated, gesturing at the snow outside.

She sighed, handing over her glass. She knew he had a point. “You twisted my arm.”

He poured her some before he took his place on the couch again. They fell into a comfortable silence, her eyes focused on the flickering flames and crackling of the fire. Dean looked at her, a soft smile pulling at his lips as he noticed the peace on her features. She always looked beautiful, but when she was completely relaxed and had no worries that plagued her was when she looked the most stunning. He could never tell her that though; he didn’t know how she’d react. He had liked her from the moment he met her, but he wasn’t sure if she felt remotely the same. He didn’t really want to find out, fearing that she wouldn’t.

“I can feel your eyes on me,” she broke the silence, glancing over at him.

“Sorry,” he muttered, frowning at the fact that she caught him.

“It’s okay, Dean,” she reassured him, resting her head back against the couch as she kept her eyes on him. “Anything on your mind?”

He took a sip of bourbon, staring down into the glass. “Nope.”

“That was a long pause,” she observed, smirking. “Okay, spill. There’s clearly something.”

“I was taking a sip,” he pointed out.

“Yeah, but there was still a lot of silence,” she argued.

“Y/N, it’s-it’s really nothing-” he started but his words dissolved on his tongue as she shifted closer to him on the sofa.

“Is it about Sam?” she asked. She knew his little brother was always a source of worry for him.

“No,” he replied, taking a large gulp of the alcohol in the tumbler.

“Is it about Bobby?”

“What is this, twenty questions?” he responded, annoyed at the third degree.

“No,” she sighed, holding his gaze. “It’s okay if you don’t want to tell me. I shouldn’t push it.”

His eyes closed briefly as he let out a deep exhale, his lids fluttering open as he looked at her. “No, it’s not about Bobby.”

Their eyes never left each other as she thought his words over for a moment. “Is it about me?”

He knew he couldn’t ignore the question, or what he felt for her any longer. “Yes.”

She was taken aback by his answer, instantly fearing that she had done something wrong. She shifted closer to him, the scent of his aftershave tickling her nose, a couple of inches still between them.

“Dean, whatever it is… you can tell me,” she whispered, slowly curling her hand over his.

He could’ve explained himself through words, but he had never been good at expressing his feelings that way. Actions always spoke louder.

With their gazes still locked, her heart began to beat rapidly in her chest as his green orbs stared down at her, making her gulp at how close they were to each other. He slowly leaned in, and before she even realized it, a gasp escaped her just as his lips pressed against hers in a soft kiss. Her eyes fluttered closed as he squeezed her hand in his, allowing herself to move closer to him. She lifted her other hand, cupping his face and letting her thumb stroke over the chiseled line of his jaw, a low moan leaving her as his tongue slipped between her lips, deepening the embrace.

It was over just as quickly as it began, leaving her breathless when he pulled away, both of them staring at each other. Dean shook his head, hoping he hadn’t overstepped, that he hadn’t just ruined everything between them. A small smile, hopeful but weary, pulled at her lips.

“I wish you would’ve done that sooner,” she admitted, laughing.

He grinned. “Better late than never, I guess.”

She leaned into him, her hand resting over his heart covered by his red and black plaid shirt, her forehead pressed against his. She couldn’t really believe what had just happened, feeling like she’d wake up at any moment and it would’ve all been a dream. The longer she stayed in that embrace, in the peace and quiet of the cabin, the only sounds coming from the fireplace, she knew it was all real. It was finally real.

“We have until this storm is over to make up for lost time,” he said, peering into her eyes.

“Hey, better not just be during the storm,” she warned, lifting an eyebrow.

He chuckled, shaking his head as his lips hovered over hers. “Don’t worry, sweetheart. I ain’t lettin’ you go any time soon.”

“Sounds good to me, Winchester.”

They spent the rest of the night curled up together in front of the fire, before moving things into the bedroom, finding a better way to keep warm during the snowstorm.

[bananayuyu]

Cabin Fever [part 3]

Pairing: Yunho x f reader

Genre: fluff and smut (and some angst this chapter)

Word count: 12.2k

Summary: A confrontation, a fainting spell, a jealous Yunho and a weirdly pissy Hongjoong. The morning gets off to a rough start but somehow the day couldn't have ended more perfectly.

Warnings: MDNI, smut, mentions of Hongjoong's family being homophobic/transphobic, vaginal sex, cream pie, unprotected sex (it's safe, you'll see)

A/n: Part 3 is finally here! The biggest shoutout in the world to @mingtinysworld, my absolute bestie (I love you so much!!<3). I must give her credit for coming up with several of the things that happen in this chapter. Things get a bit more angsty this chapter but I hope not too much. (Also I refer to Wooyoung as both bisexual and a slut in this chapter but want to clarify that I'm not trying to play into that stereotype!! it's just two things that felt fitting for the character in this story. bi people are no more or less likely to be slutty than anyone else). this chapter took longer than I expected to finish because I've finally mapped out what I want to do for the rest of the series! I hope you all enjoy this part! <3

Linked here is my masterlist where you can find the previous parts. Again let me know if you'd like to be added to the taglist! (it will be six parts in total if everything goes to plan)

Read part 4 here!

Taglist: @certifiedmoa @pautiny27 @luvbit3z @dawn-iscozy @artistic-rendition

@yeosangiess @drinkingrumandcocacola @smally97 @kierraperkins3 @newworldwritings

@peachyy-jooniee @lucid-galaxys-world

You wake like your first morning in the cabin to the bright hot sun, the storm having moved out of the area overnight. You feel too warm laying in your bed with Yunho wrapped around you; you look down and see you both kicked off your blanket at some point in the night. You roll over to wriggle free, your skin feeling sticky with sweat and your hair feeling matted and knotty. You know the reflection you'll be greeted with in the mirror will be quite a mess.

"Morning," Yunho yawns, stretching his arms above his head, his bare abdomen looking so enticing even first thing in the morning.

"I'm so sweaty," you laugh, yawning as well.

"I know, me too," he says, turning his head to the side to get a whiff of his own underarm. "Oh, god," he says, making you giggle. Leaning over to get a whiff yourself, you stick your nose right into the small patch of hair.

"Mmm, so good," you say, a smile on your face. "I need to bottle that scent."

"What would you call it?" Yunho chuckles, pulling you close to him despite the heat.

"Hmm, something like, tall man with large hands." You laugh at how dumb and simple your response is.

"Mm, with notes of sex god and a handsome face," Yunho replies, a cocky grin on his face. You roll your eyes, but truthfully deep down you find it kind of hot when he gets that way.

"No, with notes of gamer nerd and 'never eats vegetables' actually," you say, teasing him. He reaches down to your side to tickle you, making you shriek with laughter, before climbing on top of you and kissing you, deeply. Immediately it's heated, like he's trying to remind you of everything from the night before, his hips bucking into yours slightly and the pressure on your core feeling so enticingly good.

With a ragged breath you break the kiss, your head feeling fuzzy.

"I'm too hot," you say, half-heartedly pushing him off you, not really wanting it to stop.

"Yeah, I know," Yunho says, his tone again cocky, his mouth moving down to your neck and hands grabbing at your ass and thighs. You giggle and sigh into his movements, feeling yourself already getting wet, your body already craving him. But you also feel so out of it and hungry, and you think of everyone else up and about; Seonghwa will probably be worried again if you stay in here too long.

"Yunhooo," you whine, pushing him off with a little more force, and he relents, kissing your nose as he moves off of you.

"I wanna eat you," he says, his face flushed with lust. You squeal and cover your face in embarrassment; no one has ever said something like that to you in your life. Yunho smiles at your reaction, absolutely loving the effect he has on you. Whenever he makes you smile, laugh, moan, it makes his chest feel full, like he's doing exactly what he's meant to do with his life.

Finally the two of you stumble out of bed, and you rake your fingers through your hair, trying your best to smooth it out. Your hairbrush is in the bathroom and you feel like you could really use a shower, so you decide you'll do that first thing this morning, right after getting some food in you. The two of you head out the door together, not thinking much, Yunho's hoodie the only article of clothing you have on. You rub your tired eyes, your body still feeling weak, but your cramps not present like they had been. You feel ready for the day, hopeful that your body will finally feel okay.

As soon as you enter the living room, you notice everyone's eyes on you. You halt in your tracks; everyone is acting strange and you can sense a bit of tension in the room immediately.

"What's going on?" you ask, your voice a bit groggy, your brain still not totally awake. The room is silent for a moment; you feel Yunho's hand on your shoulder grip you ever so slightly.

"I think everyone needs to talk to you both," Seonghwa says, finally breaking the silence. You turn in his direction, confusion clear on your face. It wasn't like last year when Hongjoong and Seonghwa hooked up, everyone confronted them about it. You knew it was probably pretty obvious what was happening, but you didn't think everyone needed an explanation. Not right now, at least. You turned towards Ari, looking at her with concern.

"I don't have anything I need to say," she says to the room, clearly trying to communicate to you that she didn't share anything, nor does she see the need for this. Her eyes almost seem to be pleading with everyone, to drop the subject, or maybe she just looks worried. Whatever it is, her look sets you on edge, and you step away from Yunho without realizing it, your body instinctually trying to isolate itself.

"Can I not get something to eat first? What is going on?" you ask, trying not to panic. Again everyone is silent for a second, and some of their faces look stony; you're worried that there isn't something you're understanding. "Fucking hell, just say it, please," you beg.

"Did you realize how loud you two were being last night?" Hongjoong finally spits out, making your stomach drop.

"Oh, fuck," you groan into your hands, wishing the floor could open up and sallow you whole.

"Woah, woah. Why the hell are you saying this in front of everyone?" Yunho responds to him, not doing a good job of controlling the anger in his tone.

"Because everyone heard you last night, not just me," Hongjoong shoots back, clearly pissed at Yunho's tone.

"Ari just said she has nothing to say about this," Yunho retorts, his eyes narrowing.

"Okay let me clarify then, every one of us who has to sleep out here on these couches, while the two of you get a private space all to yourselves, we all heard you guys last night." Hongjoong's volume is rising, and you don't know why he's so pissed. But you feel mortified, so shocked this conversation is even happening. "I know it is possible to hook up in this cabin without making everyone hear it," he says.

You've physically turned yourself away from the room, wanting to inch your way into the kitchen but feeling stuck to the floor.

"This is so ridiculous, why are you acting like you've never heard people having sex before? It couldn't have been that fucking loud," Yunho sighs loudly, shocked himself that any one of your friends would even care. You all were very, very comfortable around each other. He knew Hongjoong was one of the more modest of the bunch, but still. He was fucking Seonghwa out in the middle of the forest last night, for god's sake.

"It was, pretty loud," Mingi sighs, his voice much calmer and quieter than Hongjoong's but still laced with tension, as if he's trying to bring the conversation back to normal. "Like someone was watching porn on their phone at full volume, or something." He laughs, obviously trying to lighten the mood, but it doesn't work.

"Oh god, please, stop," you finally find words, running to the kitchen. Ari jumps up and runs after you, wrapping her arms around you as you bury your head into your hands even further.

"Don't say shit like that right now, it's not funny," Yunho says, his face flushed with anger.

"Sorry I was just trying to- I don't know why this got so weird," Mingi replies, stumbling over his words. "I just thought you guys would want to know how audible it was."

"Listen, I'm fucking sorry. I obviously didn't realize, I obviously wasn't wanting you all to hear," you say from the kitchen, shaking with how embarrassed you feel. Ari rubs your back, trying to comfort you.

"Look at how awful you've made her feel. Do you guys feel good about that?" Yunho spits out, his words fiery. Something in you shatters at how protective he's being, and you suddenly gag with nausea, running over to the sink.

"Yunho, no one is trying to hurt her feelings," Seonghwa replies, trying in desperation to keep the conversation from spiraling into a full blown fight.

"What are you trying to do then?" Yunho asks, eyes scanning around the room to catch a glimpse of everyone's faces.

"I think what everyone was trying to say, though they didn't do a very good job I will admit, was that you two being so loud last night made them a bit uncomfortable and made it hard to sleep. And-"

"It made me horny, that's why I couldn't sleep," Wooyoung cuts him off.

"For fucks sake Woo, not now," Seonghwa replies, still managing to keep his tone light. "I think everyone really just wanted to ask you two if you could keep it down going forward. That's all," he finishes, shooting a look in Hongjoong's direction that seemed to say a million things.

"And that couldn't have been said to me privately, by like, one person?" you ask from the kitchen, trying to keep your body from releasing all of yesterday's food.

"I'm sorry honey, everyone was talking about it this morning and I thought it would be better for it just to be out in the open," Seonghwa says to you, like he's taking responsibility for it.

"Everyone was talking about it, how great," you reply, your tone laced with sarcasm.

"You all are being so fucking immature," Yunho continues, his anger still evident.

"Yunho, it's not like we were all giggling about it like twelve years olds or something. But you guys were having loud sex, you really expect that none of us would to mention it to each other this morning?" Wooyoung replies. "My cousins are here, and they don't really know you guys like we do, you know?"

"I get that Woo, and I'm sorry Jongho and Yeosang if it made you guys uncomfortable," he says, looking sincerely in their direction. "But again, why did you all have to confront us like this first thing in the morning?! When you know how awful she's been feeling! This whole conversation did not have to happen this way at all!" He is almost yelling, more worked up than you've seen him in a long time. You feel thankful he's standing up for you, as it seems he's the only man in the room who understands how mortified you feel. But his raised voice and tone are starting to set everyone on edge, you can feel it, and you really, really don't want this conversation to get even worse.

"I'm going to bathroom," you mutter, quickly walking yourself over and closing the door tightly behind you. In the mirror over the sink you finally get a good look at yourself, your messy appearance matching exactly how you feel on the inside. You hair is as knotty as you thought it would be, and you start trying to brush it out, wincing every time you tug a little too hard. You feel yourself start to heave again, so you lean down over the toilet in case anything comes up. The smallest amount of puke leaves your lips and you grimace at the bitter taste, quickly shuffling over to the sink to rinse out your mouth. Sat on your knees on the floor you breath deeply, the nausea having passed now that you're in a room by yourself, blocking out the argument happening outside. You're just starting to think you're feeling better, about to stand up, when everything goes black.

For a brief moment you feel yourself crumple to the floor, the tile cold against your uncovered legs. But then you're fully gone, not hearing or knowing anything.

"Y/n, can you hear me? Are you here?"

You wake to Yunho crouched over you, a hand on your wrist checking your pulse. Your eyes barely open, the light of the room making your head hurt. You try to say something to him but you can't; only a pathetic whimper leaves your lips as you try to wake yourself.

"I'm here," he says, stroking a hand through your hair and rubbing the back of your head where it meets your neck. You've told him many times that it feels good to be rubbed there, especially when you've just fainted, so now he makes sure he does it every time. He sits with you in silence, just like you've asked him to, waiting for your body to fully regain consciousness. It takes a little while but finally you move, opening your eyes more to meet his, curling up your body in his direction.

"How'd it happen?" he asks.

"I like, puked, and then I felt better, but then I ended up here, I don't know," you say, trying to remember everything that had happened before your memory cut out.

"So you were standing?" he asks, very concerned.

"No I was like, on my knees cause of leaning over the toilet to puke. I just closed my eyes to breathe for a second and then I collapsed."

"Did you hit your head?"

"I don't think so," you respond, looking up at him with teary eyes. He looks down and assesses your pupils, pretty sure they look normal in the light of the bathroom. He runs a hand through your hair, trying to keep his breathing normal. But his heart is racing out of control, his panic not subsiding. Not when he found you collapsed in a heap on the floor, minutes after he finished arguing with everyone else. A piercing anger runs through his chest, anger at how everyone acted this morning. It must have made you unbelievably stressed, being called out like that and humiliated in front of everyone. It's probably the reason you're here on the floor now, why your body just gave out on you. His breathing is ragged as he stares at you, as much as he tries to appear calm for your sake. It just can't happen right now, not after everything that happened this morning.

"Yunho, I'll be fine," you say, putting a hand on his thigh.

"I know," he responds, his throat tense, his eyes looking panicked.

"You're scaring me," you tell him, tears forming in your eyes.

"Fuck, I'm sorry. With everything that just happened I was so caught off guard finding you here. I'm so worried about you," he says, tears forming in his eyes as well.

"It'll be okay, I just need to rest," you say, repeating something you've said probably thousands of times in your life, to people around you when you're sick. How common it was for other people to be even more panicked than you, when you were the one actually experiencing the issue. Yunho can read the frustration in your tone easily, and it feels like a stab in his chest knowing that he isn't helping you how he knows he should.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he says, collecting himself and stroking the back of your head again, hoping it's comforting. "Do you want me to carry you to your bed?" he asks.

"Can you please go get Hwa," you ask, not able to hide your frustration with him.

"Of course," he says, sounding almost defeated, and even though you asked for it, it hurts when he moves away from you to go get your other friend. In the few moments that you're alone again you start crying, tears streaming down onto the floor, your body finally starting to release some of it's tension.

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry I didn't realize you had passed out," Seonghwa says as soon as he enters, leaning down to wipe the tears off your cheeks.

"It's okay," you squeak, still crying.

"Why don't I get you to a couch so you can rest more comfortably?" he asks, stroking a hand through your hair. "I can brush out your hair too, if you want."

"It's so bad," you say, groaning.

"Not at all," he says, positioning you to hoist you up, finally standing and walking carefully so he doesn't hit any part of you on the doorframe.

As soon as you exit the bathroom you can hear the arguing, and it makes you grab your ears, wishing you could silence everyone.

"You realize that wouldn't have happened if you didn't talk to her like assholes this morning, right?!" you hear Yunho say, again on the verge of yelling.

"How was I supposed to know she was going to faint!?" Hongjoong retorts, sounding exasperated. "I obviously didn't want that to happen Yunho, Jesus Christ!"

"Dude, you know how fragile her body is! And that she's been feeling terribly the past few days; you probably could have predicted this would be the outcome, honestly," Yunho says, refusing to back down.

"Yunho that's a crazy thing to say," Mingi interjects, sounding almost scared to speak up. "Obviously none of us wanted to cause her to faint."

"Frankly, the way things sounded last night it seemed like she was feeling better," Hongjoong interjects, still on edge.

"Stop mentioning it, it's been talked about enough," Yunho snaps, his voice lower but his anger still obviously at a boiling point. The look he shoots Hongjoong is stern, scarier than he realizes.

"You're the one who came in here yelling," Hongjoong responds, arms crossed over his chest.

"I'm not yelling. I'm pissed at you all because you made her faint," Yunho says, voice still low.

"Will you all please get off of this couch so I can set y/n down?" Seonghwa cuts them off, taking in a slow deep breath. He sets you down gently, placing several pillows behind your back and head to prop you up, grabbing his glass of water from the morning and making you drink some. When Yunho sees the absolute state you are in his anger spikes again; he's seen you like this quite a few times, but never under these circumstances. You'd always been home, close to the local hospital, in your predictable environment. Here it was different, especially with so many people around. He feels utterly out of his depth, but something in him still needs to care for you.

Sitting down next to you he grabs your hand, brushing his thumb along your palm in small circular motions. He wants to apologize a thousand times over, wants to scream at everyone else, especially Hongjoong, and wants to ask how you're feeling. But he doesn't know if any of that is the right thing to do. He suddenly feels a pang of jealousy, at seeing the way Seonghwa methodically takes care of you, seeming to know exactly what to say and what to do, in every moment.

"Yunho, you're freaking her out," Seonghwa says, moving over to help you drink more water. He takes your hand out of Yunho's, helping you grip the glass, making sure you don't spill on yourself. "If you can't keep calm right now then you need to leave the room."

"How- how am I supposed to keep calm right now?" Yunho asks, his voice shaking.

"I don't know, do whatever helps you. You know, for some people breathing calmly helps, others visualize certain things, others need to cry for a bit, maybe go for a quick run. Whatever works for you," Seonghwa says, feeling frustrated with Yunho but not letting it show.

"I don't want to leave her," Yunho says.

"She'll be perfectly fine in my care, don't you think?" Seonghwa responds, trying not to sound patronizing. Trying really to get Yunho to realize himself that he should take a step back, and give you space. He can tell it's not doing you any good, the way Yunho is acting. Even if it's coming from a good place.

"I don't want all of them near her," Yunho says, gesturing his head in the direction of the other boys.

"It's not like they're going to hurt her Yunho," Seonghwa replies, still helping you sip at your water. Yunho looks at Seonghwa, wanting to believe him. Logically he knows it's true, but he really does worry that something one of them says could make you faint again.

"God I'm so fucking pissed," Yunho sighs out, putting his head in his hands.

"Yunho, stop," you say, your voice almost a whisper as you try not to start crying again.

"Ok, that's it, you need to get out of here," Seonghwa finally says to Yunho, placing his hand on his knee to get his full attention. Yunho shoots him a hurt look, feeling a bit caught off guard. Seonghwa's never told him something like this before, when you were sick. Usually he appreciated having another person there to help. He slowly stands up, walking towards the kitchen to get away.

"Dude, lighten up," Mingi says, slapping Yunho gently on the back in a gesture of attempted kindness. But it doesn't go over how he's hoping.

"Dude, shut the fuck up," Yunho says, making you cringe into yourself. It really does feel like he's coming apart at the seams, and it makes you feel so panicked.

"Alright, fuck, everyone listen to me," Seonghwa says, standing up to face the room. "Look I really don't like having to do this, having to treat you all like you're fucking children, but clearly all of you don't understand how to emotionally take care of yourselves, and your dramatics are making our very sick friend feel even worse. So here's what we're going to do. All of you boys are going to go outside, and finish that game of basketball we started yesterday. With the exception of Wooyoung, because I need you and Ari to stay in and assist me. The rest of you please, go outside and work out your fucking differences on that court, and come back inside in much better spirits and aware of your fucking impact on other people. Okay?" He finishes talking with an expectant look, and everyone knows he won't take no for an answer. Soon they're all shuffling outside, and once they're all gone and the back door is shut, you immediately feel a bit better. The energy of the room is immediately lighter, and you take a big sigh of relief, readjusting yourself to get comfortable.

"Thank you Hwa," you say, finishing the glass of water in your hands.

"Of course. I'm sorry they were all acting like that, I hope I didn't stress you out too," he responds, his voice so gentle again.

"I don't even think that's why I fainted, I know Yunho kept saying that but it's probably just cause my period was so bad. I feel like that's a more logical explanation," you say, the quieter room allowing your brain to finally work a bit more.

"I know, I agree. I've never seen him so scared," Seonghwa says, rubbing his hand along your arm.

"Me too, it was freaking me out," you say, turning to look him in the eye. "Just so you know, we aren't like dating or something. This whole, thing, between me and Yunho, it just started on this trip. And I don't even know what it is. I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to talk to you about it yesterday." It feels good to finally get the words out.

"You don't have to apologize. I was pretty sure nothing had happened before, cause I know you would've told me. Believe me, I know the affects this cabin can have on people," he chuckles, making you smile. "By the way, I'm sorry for how Hongjoong was talking to you earlier, genuinely. I don't think it's wrong for him to feel uncomfortable, if that's really what the issue was, but he was being kind of an asshole." Seonghwa looks crestfallen, like he's embarrassed to be apologizing on behalf of Hongjoong.

"You don't have to apologize for him, Hwa. Just because you two are kind of, involved or whatever, doesn't mean you need to do that." Seonghwa nods his head at your words, but his face doesn't change, and it looks like he's lost in thought. "What's going on, why does your face look like that?" you ask.

"Just, I don't know why he was being like that with you two, everyone was talking about it in a funny way this morning. I guess he was being weird all morning, even before you guys came out here. I'll tell you in a minute, just, hold on." He turns his attention to the other two sitting on the couch across, giving you space. "Wooyoung can you please make some quick soup for y/n, something salty with meat and vegetables. And also some chamomile tea please, with a teaspoon of honey?"

"Of course, coming right up," Wooyoung says, climbing off the couch. "Y/n I'm sorry about this morning, I thought it would be just a little joke. I didn't realize it would get so, serious," he says as he crosses the room.

"Thank you, Woo. I'm sorry if your cousins felt weird," you reply, them truly being the people you worried you'd crossed a line with. The rest of you had heard the odd sound or two and talked about sex at length over the years you'd known each other, but those two didn't know you at all.

"Oh, I don't really think they cared, we were all laughing about it last night. I just, I was a little surprised Yunho was so pissed that we were talking about it. I hope- I hope you know we weren't being weird or gross," he replies.

"I know, it is just a bit mortifying though, you have to understand," you say.

"I know, I'm sorry. We will forget it even happened, we'll have a fun day," Woo says, starting to work on your tea, raising his voice so he can be heard from the kitchen. "What do you want to do, after you eat?" he asks.

"Y/n, you wanna put makeup on them? We haven't done that in forever," Ari pipes up from the other couch, her voice also gentle like Seonghwa's.

"Ooh, that actually sounds so fun. If you both are down?" you ask Seonghwa and Wooyoung, giving Seonghwa your best puppy-dog eyes.

"How could I say no," Seonghwa replies, smiling.

"That sounds fun!" Wooyoung replies from the kitchen, busily readying your tea and prepping for cooking.

"That'll be good," you say, breathing in the relief of their good, calm company. "Thank you guys for being, like, normal this morning."

***

After you drink your tea and eat your breakfast, you start to feel a little better. You're clearly still in a weak state, needing to stay sat on the couch, but you have the energy to talk with everyone. Ari had gone and grabbed her large makeup bag from her room, setting out everything methodically on the large coffee table. Everything is organized by product type, and you both begin looking over everything, deciding what you'll be doing.

"Woo, can I put eyeliner on you?" Ari asks.

"Sure, do whatever," Wooyoung responds, honestly just loving the attention. He's always loved when you two would do his makeup, just for the simple fact that he got to spend so much time having someone else fret over him.

"I'm gonna make you look so cool," Ari says, grabbing the shade of foundation she was going to use, and the eyeliner and black eye shadow.

"Okay well if you're doing that, I'm gonna make Hwa like, super feminine, pretty, pink," you say, grabbing your favorite highlighter and the shade of pink lip gloss you think will look perfect on him. "Wait, can I do your hair too?" you ask Hwa.

"What are you going to do?" he asks you. You know he's very protective of his hair, especially since he's been growing it out so long this past year.

"I just want to put it in pigtails or something, not use any heat on it," you say.

"Okay, that's fine," he says, positioning himself in front of you so you can start applying the makeup.

As you both begin the room falls into a comfortable quietness, with only a few words being exchanged here or there. Mostly it's just you and Ari asking each other how a certain thing looks, or asking each other for advice. Having something to focus on that is purely fun, purely creative helps get your mind off your terrible morning, and soon you feel yourself really start to feel better. A little while later one of the boys pokes their head in asking about lunch, but Seonghwa makes them stay outside, asking Wooyoung to whip together something quick and just bring it out to them. He wants to prolong this gentle calm atmosphere for as long as he can, so that you can truly rest up and feel better. And he himself feels relieved from not having to be in the same room as Hongjoong.

"Wait, you were going to tell me something about Hongjoong," you say to him as you gently apply his highlight.

"Oh, yeah, that," Seonghwa sighs.

"What is it?" you ask, looking at him with concern.

"He's just been really distant and cold, all morning. And yesterday things were like, so good, we were having all these conversations, we talked about some very personal things. Each night he's been cuddling me to sleep, like specifically asking me to come cuddle with him. I didn't expect that sort of thing when we came here, but he's been so touchy and so sweet, and then suddenly this morning he was like avoiding me, not sitting next to me, not talking to me. And he was being so weird talking with Yunho this morning too, both of them were in such weird moods. I don't know what to think. I shouldn't like someone who is hot and cold with me, I know I shouldn't. But something, yesterday, there was something that happened that felt almost perfect and I can't get it out of my head."

"I don't like that he was being like that with you this morning," you sigh. "I don't get why he gets that way sometimes."

"It's cause of his family, right?" Ari asks, carefully starting to apply Wooyoung's eyeliner.

"I know they're insane and homophobic, but he's twenty-seven. Maybe I'm being unfair, but he's been independent from them for nearly a decade. And they don't even live in the same city as us anymore. I just feel upset that he hasn't worked on changing more. That was how he was in high school. And he knows all of us, especially Seonghwa, are going to love and respect him always. I know his defense mechanism with his family is to shut himself off from them, but why does he have to be that way with us?" you say.

"He's clearly all messed up about something," Seonghwa replies, sighing. "I actually thought he'd changed a lot. You know last year after our trip, I was worried he'd be really awkward and avoid the subject with me, but when we spoke about what had happened between us he was very direct and open. He seemed like he was able to really talk about his feelings. So I thought he had finally changed."

"I'm sorry, my inability to keep things quiet last night might have contributed. I truly feel bad, I did not realize," you say.

"Your moans did not put him in a bad mood," Seonghwa laughed, grabbing your cheek reassuringly. "He was fine last night. It was a this morning thing. Who knows."

You nod, not really wanting to talk about it anymore. And it seems Seonghwa doesn't either, nor do the other two, because the subject is dropped. You finally put on the pink lip gloss, the final touch to your beautiful masterpiece. Seonghwa's full lips shine beautifully, his entire face perfection.

"You've got to do more makeup campaigns," you say, staring in awe.

"I know, that first one I did all those years ago was so fun," he says, reminiscing.

"Can I do your hair now?" you ask, giddy. Seonghwa turns himself around, grabbing two small hair ties off the table for you to use. Once you've placed the two hair ties just as you want them you turn him around, taking a look at the adorable pigtails.

"God, you look so good with your hair like that. You are like, the most androgynous person I've ever seen," you say, knowing it's a compliment he loves.

"Do I look pretty?" he asks, twirling for you.

"The prettiest," you say, smiling. Suddenly, an idea pops into your head. "Hwa, you should put on the sun dress I brought with me."

"You think it'll fit?" he asks.

"Oh yeah, it's like stretchy in the back. I think you've worn it before, it's that yellow one, with the pink flowers," you say. "It's in the bottom of my suitcase, if you want to go grab it."

Seonghwa never turns down an opportunity to wear your dresses or skirts, always having loved how he felt in them. As he goes to find your dress in the library you turn to Wooyoung and Ari, who are almost done themselves. Ari is putting the finishing touches on the smoky shadow that accompanies heavy eyeliner, the obvious star of the show.

"This is some of your best work," you say, amazed. A part of you is almost pissed that these two boys look way better in makeup than you do. But more than anything you feel lucky to have people so willing to let the two of you experiment.

"Do I look sexy?" Wooyoung asks, fluttering his eyes at the both of you. It's basically all he ever wants to be called, so you both giggle.

"Of course you do," Ari says, laughing at him.

Just then Seonghwa reenters the room, your dress the only piece of clothing he's now wearing.

"Stop, you look so freaking cute," you say, staring at him in awe.

"Hwa, you should start wearing your hair like that all the time. It looks so good," Ari adds.

"Woo, what do you think?" Seonghwa says, looking at him expectantly.

"Um well, sorry, but you look extremely fuckable," he says, making you all burst into laughter. "You look really pretty," he says, his cheeks looking a little pink even under his makeup.

"Oh, so you're horny again," Ari says, to more laughter.

"I can't help it, it feels like everyone in this damn cabin is fucking except for me," Wooyoung responds.

"You know, there are ways of relieving those pent up feelings yourself," you say, motioning to your hand.

"It's not the same," he grumbles, making you all giggle again.

"Woo it's barely been four days on this cabin trip, are you already that desperate to have sex with someone?" Seonghwa asks, coming to sit down next to you again.

"Oh god don't chastise him, it'll probably turn him on more," Ari says, smirking at Wooyoung. He visibly squirms in front of her, not able to sit still anymore with the current topic of conversation.

"Every friend group needs a bisexual, bratty slut I guess," Seonghwa says, and the room is erupting in laughter again, even from Wooyoung.

"I don't think I'm the only slut in this group," Wooyoung says, shooting you a look.

"Ok woah, I might be very sex positive but I am not a slut, Woo. I've slept with maybe one percent of the number of people you have," you respond, looking at him with mock exasperation.

"But y/n, being slutty is really just a state of mind, it's not about the actual number of people you've slept with. And it seems like a certain someone has turned you into one recently," he says, making your mouth fall open. "I'm not trying to be mean, I swear," he says in reaction to your face. "I'm just glad you two are finally fucking," he says with his full chest, making Seonghwa and Ari laugh hard.

"Ok, so, you're saying you've been wanting this to happen?" you say, laughing and holding out your hands in confusion.

"Well, that man certainly has wanted it to, and I thought maybe you did too, but I was starting to wonder if I was wrong. I was always fascinated, it was like my own little experiment, watching to see just how long two people who obviously found each other attractive would hold out. I was especially shocked that it didn't happen when you moved into together," he says, eyeing you with adoration more than anything, which helps you not feel so exposed by his words. "I know not everyone is as much of a horn dog as I am, but it's not like either of you are asexual, either. I knew it would happen someday," he finishes.

"How did like, everyone else know this was gonna happen before I did?" you ask, remembering Ari's insistence yesterday that he was in love with you, and also remembering Mingi's look in the hot spring your first night. Fuck, he knew too, you thought. Did everyone else know?

"You wouldn't be you if this had happened any other way," Seonghwa says, grabbing your hand.

"I know, I'm kind of oblivious," you say, turning towards him with a downturned smile.

"Only to how magnetic you are to certain people. You've never been able to tell when someone likes you," he says, squeezing your hand slightly. It makes you laugh because it's true, very true.

"My mind is usually elsewhere," you say, making him chuckle.

"I know," he says, and he truly means it. He knows all of the places your mind usually is, good and bad.

"What time is it?" you ask, feeling your stomach rumble.

"Should we let everyone back in?" Seonghwa asks.

"Yeah, I think they should be okay by now. And I'm hungry, I wanna have some dinner," you say. "I feel a lot better, thank you guys," you say giving them each a quick hug before settling yourself back down on the couch. "I think my period is basically over."

"Already? It's been like two days, right?" Ari asks.

"Yeah, sometimes if they're that heavy it's all over that quickly," you say.

"I'm glad it's over," Hwa says, before handing you another glass of water he'd just filled. You sip at it, watching as he walks to the back door to open it, his long lean legs looking gorgeous under your dress. "You all can come back in now, if you want," you hear him say.

As the boys slowly make their way back inside you see they're all sweaty, the sun hot and the air humid from the previous day's weather. Most of them do a bit of a double take at Seonghwa's appearance, and at Wooyoung's too.

"Looks like you all had fun in here," Yeosang says, smiling at Wooyoung.

"How was the game?" Woo asks him.

"It was good, felt good to run so hard. We won," he says, with a proud smile.

"Well you had Yunho and Mingi on your team, so it wasn't exactly fair," Woo responds, making Yeosang laugh.

The two tallest men are the last to reenter, their faces glistening in sweat, Yunho's eyes still looking the slightest bit sullen. A small part of your heart twinges, but you try to ignore it. You want this moment to be a fresh start from the morning, to help everyone back to the fun energy of the previous few days.

"Everyone, look, doesn't Seonghwa look so pretty?" you say, hoping everyone comes with you as you glide towards lighter subjects. "Here, come here, let me touch up your lip gloss Hwa."

He comes down and sits in front of you, and you gently brush the applicator over his lips, his face completely still just as you need it. From the kitchen Yunho watches, your hands on his face, your lips on his temple when you give him a small kiss. He does feel better after playing so hard, but instead of anger he now feels what must be envy; it feels like it's snaking up his back to his neck, threatening to choke him. He will never be Seonghwa, never be what Seonghwa is to you. It's a soul crushing realization.

"Ok, there," you say after giving Seonghwa a quick peck on the temple, careful not to mess up the makeup you spent hours on. "Give everyone a little walk," you say.

"Is that your dress?" Mingi asks him as he watches him walk, everyone cooing out their praises.

"No, it's y/n's," Seonghwa responds.

"Oh wow, it fits so well. It looks so good on you," Mingi says, matter of factly.

You gaze around the room, watching Seonghwa's face light up at everyone's praise, when suddenly your eyes land on Hongjoong. Stood in the corner of the room, nursing occasionally at his water bottle, he's unable to take his eyes off of Seonghwa, and it almost looks like he isn't blinking. His face is possibly the softest you've ever seen it, his eyes looking big and gentle and his eyebrows turned up every so slightly in the middle. He doesn't move a muscle but you can see his chest rising and falling, his body seeming almost unaware of anything. Except for the man standing in front of him in a pretty yellow dress.

Suddenly you're snapped back, to Seonghwa's first ever major photo shoot, the one you and most of your friends accompanied him to, to help him feel confident during such a big step in his career. He was only twenty-one then, only about a year into his modeling career. Thinking back now you all were babies, just getting your starts in the world, nowhere even close to finding your feet and knowing who you were. It was such a high profile magazine, and you couldn't have been more excited and hopeful for your friend, unbelievably honored that he asked you to come with him. Everyone had cleared their schedules to be there.

It was the first time you'd seen just how great Seonghwa looked in a dress, all dolled up. As much as he liked feminine clothes, he rarely wore them himself because he feared judgement. But this space was different; every model for that campaign was androgynous. You had never been in a room with so many people who didn't fit into the gender norms. You all waited patiently as Hwa went to change into his outfit for his photo shoot; the room was giant and full of little changing rooms, and you all lost him in the sea of people and chairs, clothes and makeup. Until he finally emerged.

That was the only other time you'd seen Hongjoong look like this. His eyes went so wide you thought they might pop out. He was frozen, truly frozen then, not a single thing in his hand for him to fiddle with. Then, like now, it seemed like he became utterly unaware of anything else in the room, except Seonghwa. He stood like that for a while, you don't remember how long exactly, but then abruptly excused himself.

This time you think it's about a full minute, a full sixty seconds of him staring, not moving an inch. And you can't stop staring too, at his face, trying to read what it all means. When he finally breaks his eyes away from Seonghwa he catches your gaze, and without a word makes for the door, walking himself back outside. You instantly stand up too, needing answers. As you exit the house you brush past Yunho, your eyes lingering for a moment on the way his shirt is stuck to his chest. You hear Ari telling Wooyoung to walk for everyone too, and when the boys complain that they're hungry you hear Woo tell them to make their own food for once. You head is full, so full of every possible feeling, as you break out into the hot air of the late afternoon. You spot Hongjoong sitting on a log in the distance, and march your way over.

"Can I talk to you?" you ask, not bothering to ask if you can sit.

"Hey, listen, I'm sorry about this morning," Hongjoong responds, looking caught out and overwhelmed.

"You don't seem like yourself today," you say, your voice almost stern. Normally you all let each other be, and normally you feel that's the best thing to do. But after the events of the morning, and your conversation with Seonghwa, you don't feel that way right now.

"Well, I don't feel like myself. I guess I haven't done a good job of hiding it," he says, sighing tensely.

"What's up?" you ask, eyeing him with your arms crossed. He sighs, turning his face away from you, staring off into the trees. He starts shaking his head, not making a sound.

"Joong, I'm sorry, but after the way you were acting towards me and Yunho this morning I'm really not in the mood to be nice. I know you might not want to talk to me about your feelings but I need to know why you were being so weird with us, and with Seonghwa. We deserve to know," you say.

"What does Seonghwa have to do with it?" he asks, still not looking at you, fidgeting nervously with his hands.

"Ok, honestly, just forget me and Yunho, I don't even really care at this point. I know you were being cold with Seonghwa all day, why?" you ask.

"Y/n, I..." Hongjoong trails off, taking in a sharp breath, not continuing. You give him a few moments to continue his thought but he just sits there, making you antsy.

"Okay if you're not going to talk, then I'm gonna make a guess at what's going on, and you can tell me if I'm right or if I'm wrong. You love him, don't you? But you don't want to get involved with him in any real way because you're scared? Or you can't for some other reason? But when you're here you basically treat him like he's your boyfriend, cuddling him to sleep at night, sneaking him outside to fuck the daylights out of him while everyone else is in watching a movie. But it's not just a sex thing, you love him. You see him all dolled up and think he's the most precious thing you've ever seen in your life. Am I right?"

Hongjoong looks up at you finally, looking like he's scared, like he wishes he could run away. But he knows you won't let the subject drop, and maybe deep down, he's wanted to talk to someone about this.

"You have to understand, my family..." he starts, visibly shaking.

"What about them, Joong? What do they have to do with Seonghwa?" you ask gently, hoping to finally coax something out of him. With a huge breath, he finally starts talking.

"Do you remember that first big makeup campaign Hwa was a part of? For that gender neutral makeup line? Maybe a month later, I remember walking with my parents to that corner store by their old house, and there Seonghwa was on the cover of a magazine. My dad started going on and on about how gross it was, men making themselves look feminine, how they all were demeaning themselves and just wanted to be girls and how mentally ill they must be. He was saying it was gross that 'that kind of mental illness is now being treated like it's normal.' He kept going on and on and on, the whole time we shopped. He didn't even realize that one of the people on the cover was my good friend from high school that he'd met multiple times. He didn't even recognize it was Seonghwa." Hongjoong stutters out the words, clearly on the verge of breaking down.

"Oh my god Joong, that's awful," you respond, so saddened that he'd never felt able to tell you this story until now.

"I love you guys, but none of the rest of you understand what it's like to have parents like that. I've spent my whole life wishing I could stop these feelings. It would even be easier if I was attracted to masculine men; I think my parents could get past that a bit more easily. It's the gender stuff they're really freaked out by, more than people being gay. But I can't help that I like guys who are pretty. I- I obviously love him, dude, god I know it's fucking obvious. I can't control myself around him. It's fucking embarrassing. And it scares me, because I'm scared one day someone who knows my family is gonna see me reacting that way to another man and go tell my parents." By this point he's shaking hard, a few tears rolling down his cheeks as he clearly tries desperately to control himself. You scoot yourself over so you're right next to him, hugging him into a warm embrace.

"Let yourself cry, your body probably needs it," you say, holding him tight. You feel his heart race, his body so tense as he clings onto you. You just let him cry for a few minutes, not needing to respond right away. Once he's calmed down a bit you both sit up, but you stay close to him.

"I'm so, so sorry your family is that way, I can't even begin to pretend I know what it's like," you start, speaking gently. "Only you know what is best when it comes to navigating your relationships with them. I'm not going to tell you what to do. But if your choice is that you can't date Seonghwa, no matter your feelings, you need to tell him that. And explain it. If you want to hook up with him sometimes, but not date, you need to tell him that. If you want to date him but keep it entirely secret from your family, you need to tell him that. Obviously he might not like some or any of those ideas, but still you need to tell him. Right now he's just confused, and has no idea how you feel. And he's not the one who has been so awful to you, so he doesn't deserve to be kept in the dark."

"I know," Hongjoong replies, hoarsely. "I'm just, not ready for him to hate me."

"He's not going to hate you, Hongjoong," you say.

"Really? If I tell him, hey, I think you're amazing and I love you and want to be with you but can we keep it a secret from like, most people? Just in case my insane family finds out because I'm scared of them even though I'm twenty-seven years old. How awful would that make him feel?" he asks.

"Joong, if you put it like that with no explanation, yeah he'd probably not feel great. But if you told him what you just told me, I think it would be different. Keeping him in the dark is what's really not okay, and I think you being hot and cold with him is really what might make him hate you," you respond.

You both sigh deeply, looking out across the wilderness. You see a squirrel running across the start of a small trail up ahead, grabbing a nut and darting back again. You wish for a moment that was you. A butterfly flutters low in front of you, briefly landing on the ground and turning around, before flying off again. You feel heavy with emotional exhaustion and wish badly you could fly off, if only just for a moment. Just to have a chance to forget everything that had happened today, to feel free of any burden. You sigh with the knowledge that you know it's not possible, that you'll just have to feel it.

"Dinner is ready, if you want food!" Ari calls from the back door, waving at you.

"We'll be there in a minute," you call back.

***

Dinner brings the refreshed energy you were hoping for, Jongho and Yeosang having cooked up a meal everyone loved. As you all eat and chat there's plenty of laughter, still plenty of compliments for Seonghwa and Wooyoung's makeup. You sit between Seonghwa and Yunho, your favorite spot to be, feeling a lot better seeing everyone around you back to their light-hearted conversation. You see Hongjoong on the other side of Seonghwa, offering him food and bringing him refills of his drink when he needs it. It takes you a while to realize it amongst all the chattering, but the only person who is still being silent is Yunho.

Even when you gently place your head on his shoulder after Ari makes you laugh, he basically shrugs you off. You look up at him confused, because he never really does that. You've always been able to hug him or lean on him whenever you felt like it. You see he doesn't look angry anymore, just very distant. Under the table you run your hand along his leg, trying to be comforting. He lets you for a moment but then grabs your hand, gently moving it back to your lap. As soon as he finishes his food he's off, making his way to the library. Soon you excuse yourself too; your body is pulled to him and you can't stop your feet pattering along the floor, walking you fast to go find him.

You find him standing against the wall, his gaze stuck intently on his phone. You grab it from him, gently placing it on the couch. Grabbing his arms and placing them around you, you pull yourself into his body.

"Stop being weird, hug me back," you say, nuzzling into his chest. Finally he relents, pulling you close, his body tense with something you've never felt in him before.

"What's wrong?" you ask, your voice slightly muffled by his chest.

"I'm- I'm sorry I'm not Seonghwa," he answers.

"What does that mean?" you ask as you turn your head up towards him. He is staring out the window over your head, his look very distant.

"I'm sorry I make you feel worse, not better, when you're sick," he says.

"That was just today, Yunho. Usually you do make me feel better," you say.

"But that's the thing, he knows exactly what to do, even when we're out here away from the hospital. How does he just know? I could never be as prepared as him," he sighs.

"Well, he knew he needed to get me hydrated, which is basically just what they do at the hospital with an IV. So he kept feeding me water, had Wooyoung make me soup. Just got a lot of fluids in me. He knows that stuff because we've talked about it, a lot. I can teach you all of those things too, if you want me to. It's not complicated," you reply.

Yunho takes in what you say but can't find words to respond, instead letting out a quiet groan as he closes his eyes, almost collapsing into you.

"What is it?" you ask, stroking your hand through his hair, his head resting on your shoulder.

"You just, have so much more fun with him than me, don't you?" he asks.

"No, I have fun with you both. Why are you thinking that?" you ask.

"Well just, today, with him, when I came in and you were like, putting makeup on him, hugging and kissing him, you looked happier than I've seen you in a while," he says.

"You make it sound like I was making out with him in front of everyone," you laugh, squeezing him tighter. "Of course Seonghwa makes me happy, he's like basically my best friend. And he takes care of me always, and I take care of him. Of course I was having fun. That doesn't mean I like him better than you," you finish. All you get is a grunt in response, as Yunho picks his head off your shoulder, standing straight again. "Do you wish I'd put makeup on you instead?" you ask, giggling, completely joking.

But then Yunho's face sort of freezes, except for his eyes which look down to yours, and then dart to the floor.

"Wait, really? You want me to put makeup on you?" you ask, genuinely surprised. He had never in his life shown interest in makeup, as far as you knew.

"It looked like it would feel nice," he says, looking slightly embarrassed, his voice quiet.

"This is so exciting," you smile, staring up at him with giddiness. "Can I do it now?" you ask.

"Uh, sure," he responds, taken aback a bit. You let out a squeal of happiness.

"Okay, sit right here on my bed, against the pillows. I'll be right back," you say, marching your way out of the room to find Ari. She is still sat in the living room, taking pictures of Wooyoung's makeup. She immediately goes and grabs her makeup bag at your request, helping you pick out the few things you need. You hug her in thanks, running quickly back to your room. The anticipation is killing you; you just want to see Yunho's beautiful face lit up with a smile again. You haven't seen one all day.

You situate yourself on his lap, your legs straddling his, your hips coming in close contact. You know it's not really necessary, but you're looking for any excuse to be touching him after you hadn't had the chance to all day. You set out the products Ari lent you on a shelf behind his head, slowly deciding what exactly you want to do. He's given you permission to do whatever you please, so you let your mind wander, thinking of what would look best on his high cheeks, his perfect lips. You decide to forgo any face makeup, his skin already perfect as is. As you begin applying some eyeshadow he closes his eyes, his head resting gently on the bookshelf behind him. With his eyes closed you finally feel able to say it, feel able to ask the question that had been dancing in the back of your mind all day, only surfacing now that you two were finally alone.

"Did you have your vasectomy reversed?"

He'd gotten one several years ago, during his last serious relationship. He'd mentioned it to you in passing, but you'd made a point of asking him more about it later. You'd never personally known any man who'd gotten one, and couldn't help your curiosity. He'd explained his girlfriend at the time couldn't take birth control, that it gave her bad mood swings. So he got it done for her peace of mind. Your respect for him grew even stronger that day.

"No. Why do you ask?" he responds, a mischievous grin on his lips.

"Cause you went and got a condom last night," you say, still not even sure where or who he got it from. "I thought maybe that was because you'd had it reversed, or something."

"That was because we hadn't had a chance to talk about safety," he says, gently opening his eyes when you remove the brush from his lid, picking up a different palette from the shelf. "I don't know if you've been sleeping with anyone, or if you've been tested recently. And you weren't exactly in a state to have that conversation last night. I just figured using a condom was the safe thing to do."

"I haven't slept with anyone in like, two years," you respond, picking out the next color you want to apply to his crease. "But still I had my gyno test my earlier this year for like, everything. I just wanted to be sure. And I'm clean."

"Me too," he says, closing his eyes again when you quietly ask him to, so you can continue your work. "I haven't slept with anyone in a while too, but I had myself tested a few months ago. Just to be sure, like you said. I'm all good too." You just smile, a contented haze falling around you at how thoughtful and safe he is when it comes to sex. It makes you feel safe, really safe, with him. "So next time we- if we have sex again, do you not want me to use one?" he asks you. He peeks open to see you nodding, your lips curled up in a shy smile. Your reaction makes blood rush to his dick, your slight embarrassment making his head spin. Deep down he knows you like dirty, nasty things, despite your sweet, unassuming exterior. You probably want him to do unspeakable things to you.

"You want to feel my cum leaking out of you, don't you," he asks, voice low with a chuckle. Your core clenches instantly, all of the muscles of your groin instantly tensing up. You turn your head away from him briefly, unable to hide your blushing cheeks and your teeth biting onto your lower lip. Your core tightening against him answers the question for you, making Yunho even harder. "I didn't realize you liked that sort of thing," he says, a hand snaking up your thigh and coming to rest on your ass. It's now that he realizes you truly don't have anything on underneath his hoodie, and you haven't all day. He can feel the heat of your bare core through his sweats, as you start grinding yourself down on him more, your body taking over control of your movements.

"I like a lot of... things," you respond, your voice breathy with how turned on you're getting. Yunho nearly groans at your words, imagining just how many 'things' there are. He grabs your face and pulls you into a deep kiss, his head still slightly higher than yours despite your position. That makes his head spin too, how even sat on his lap you are shorter than him. He turns his head further to the side, coaxing your mouth open with his tongue, his hand on your ass guiding you to keep rubbing yourself against him. On his tongue you taste the sweet and savory flavors of dinner; you devour him like you haven't eaten in days, like he's your last hope of survival. You feel his dick getting hard beneath you, rubbing yourself along it while imaging it inside you. He grabs you tightly against him, pushing his tongue even further into your mouth, making you feel light headed with arousal. You're trying to keep your noises at bay, trying desperately not to make the sounds that you made last night. You chase the pleasure that grinding against him is giving you, but the anticipation is too much, and you need relief from it now. You push your hips back momentarily, setting down the brush in your hand to yank at his sweat pants, pulling them down just enough to let his cock spring free of the material. You move yourself forward, your pussy already so wet and ready for him. You truly don't want to waste any more time, you can't. You sink yourself down onto him, in one slow, fluid motion, sighing at the relief of having him fully seated inside of you.

"Fuck, baby," he whispers into your mouth, his lips on yours again, leaning himself forward and grabbing you tight so your bodies couldn't be any closer. You moan at how big he is, the feeling of relief also mixing with one of slight discomfort, at just how much you're being stretched.

"I can't move, I need a second," you whisper back, your eyes closed tightly in pleasure. He brushes a hand over your cheek, kissing the other, pulling back slightly to give you the moment you need. It makes him even harder seeing how much you are reacting to his size, another example of how small you are compared to him. He gently rubs a hand along your back underneath his hoodie, doing everything he can think of to help you relax. You're breathing slowly through your nose, clearly trying to calm your body, but your hips are moving every so slightly, your body still not able to stop chasing what it wants.

You open your eyes to look at him, his own eyes filled with lust and adoration, and the look makes your insides melt. But you can't help noticing your unfinished work; only one of his eyes has completed eye shadow, and a small gem at the corner bringing it all together.

"Can I finish your makeup?" you ask him, pouting.

"Now?" he responds, smiling in amusement.

"Yeah," you pout again, wishing it all looked complete.

"Okay," he nods, huffing out a laugh. He anchors his hands on your hips as you reach to grab the palette again, your pussy still so tight around him. He breathes deeply himself now, trying to keep his own desperation from hurting you or interrupting your wishes. But as you start applying the makeup again, your hands brushing gently over his skin, his closed eyes heightening every sensation, he can't help but buck his hips into you slightly, making you both moan instantly. He keeps his hands set on your hips tightly and starts rocking them back and forward, not moving you up and down his shaft so much as grinding yourself into him, the changes in pressure feeling shockingly good. You do your best to keep your upper body steady, as you finally complete the eye shadow on his second eye, sitting back to double check the symmetry. All that's left now is applying the gem, but your little noises and faces have nearly sent Yunho over the edge and he starts fucking himself up into you, holding your hips steady. You hold onto his shoulders, trying to keep yourself from falling as immense waves of pleasure wash over you. You look at his face again, his mouth agape in pleasure, his eyes looking so pretty framed by the makeup you'd applied. But still, the incompleteness eats at you.

"I can't- fuck- finish your makeup if you're fucking me like that," you say, breathless and struggling to get out such a long sentence.

"I don't really care about the makeup anymore," he says, eyes scanning down your body to watch his cock entering you over and over and stretching you out.

"It's just one more thing, let me finish," you whine, using your own momentum to try to slow his movements.

"Fuck, baby, okay," he groans, closing his eyes and breathing deeply to try to steady his rapid heart rate. His cock is throbbing with pleasure now, and with no barrier between you he can feel everything about you, just how warm and tight and wet your pussy is, squeezing down on him. He's not sure how long he can stay like this, but he wants to let you do what you want, so he begs his own body to behave, to deal with it. You shakily grab the gem, the adrenaline in your body making it nearly impossible as you almost drop it. Your body lurches forward for a second when you grab for it, making your core tighten down again and making Yunho feel like he's about to come undone. Finally you dab on the tiny spec of glue, and finally you place the gem on his face, just where you need it. Again you sit back for a moment to check the symmetry, and Yunho eyes your face intensely, waiting with baited breath for the moment he can finally move again.

"Okay, it's done," you say, a pleased smile on your face. It takes Yunho only a second to grab onto your back with one arm, anchoring himself with his other arm to his side. Suddenly you're in the air and then on your back, met the softness of your blanket. Yunho desperately grabs at his hoodie, pulling it over your head in one motion, throwing it to the side as he pulls off his own shirt with just one hand. His mouth is on yours, his chest and stomach pressed against you as he fucks you hard, his cock repeatedly hitting the perfect spot inside of you. Almost instantly your legs start shaking, your orgasm building fast and threatening to rip through you after all of the teasing before. Your breaths become too ragged for kissing, your head turned to the side as you desperately try not to moan like you did last night, not wanting to upset anyone again. Yunho lifts himself up to watch you, sitting himself up on his knees and putting your ankles on his shoulders, still fucking into you hard, the change in angle making your legs start to shake even more.

"Fuck, Yunho," you moan, feeling so fucked out you can't think of anything else but him. It only takes a few more moments and you're coming undone; your legs shake so much Yunho has to hold them tight, feeling the muscles of your cunt flutter and clench beautifully around him. He fucks you through it, loving to see the look on your face and the way you're trying so hard to be quiet. As he feels the fluttering stop he slows his thrusts a little, not wanting to stop too soon.

"Do you want another one?" he asks, his huge hands wrapped tightly around your legs still. You nod your head with a small smile, feeling like you could take him for hours if he wanted you to. "You'll have to keep it down for me then, even if it feels really good," he says, making you cover your face in embarrassment. Once again, your tightening core communicates for you, Yunho able to read you so well. "I know you like it when I talk to you like that," he says, making you squeal into your hands.

And then he's fucking you again, your legs still in the air, the angle making you come again in mere moments, as you bite down on your hand to keep from making too much noise. Yunho can tell your body can take more now, so he keeps going, feeling his own high approaching as you come for the third time in a row.

"God, I love fucking you," he whispers, his throat tight with pleasure. You feel the need for him to be close again, after coming so many times, so you wiggle your legs until he releases them, and pull at him to come down to you. He nearly collapses on top of you as he buries his face in your hair, his ragged breaths resounding in your ear. You bite down on his shoulder, the only way you can keep yourself from screaming, and suddenly you're coming again. So is Yunho, his hips finally stuttering from their diligent pace, his breathy groans uncontrollable as he cums harder than he ever has. You feel his cum inside you, filling you with warmth, making you wrap your arms and legs around him in a giant hug. As you both come down you stay stuck together, your mind a complete haze of pleasure and happiness.

"That wasn't too much, was it?" he asks you, placing a gentle kiss on your cheek and pushing himself up to get a good look at your face.

"Not at all, it was so good," you murmur, smiling wide. "Sometimes my body can take a lot."

"You're so beautiful," he says, staring at your perfect nose and lips and eyes in wonder.

"You're so beautiful," you respond, stretching your head up to kiss him. After a few more lazy moments spent wrapped around each other, Yunho grabs a pillow, tucking it under your lower back before he starts to finally pull out of you.

"Try to hold it in, I've got a towel right over there," he says, making you laugh. As you hold yourself still he darts to grab it, back to the bed in a second to start cleaning you up. As he dabs at your pussy he sees a few drops of his cum have escaped you, dripping down your ass and onto the bed below. It's so hot it almost makes him hard again, as he sits mesmerized by the sight. Knowing that there's so much still in you, that it'll be dripping out of you all night as you both sleep, makes him feel light headed. You're so tired you don't even see, your eyes closed as you nearly drift off already, your body needing rest after your hectic day. He gently moves you to the side of the bed you like, quickly wiping himself down before crawling into bed with you. You both fell asleep wrapped around each other again, his cum slowly dripping out of you and down your leg where you find it dried the next morning, a welcome reminder of your previous night.

[mr-something-0r-another]

I tend to do mostly one shots, I say as more than half of the fics I have up currently have more than one chapter, but I'm wanting to do something bigger. Just not sure which to start with. And yes, I have most of these planned out, as well as begun writing them. I'm just not sure what I should focus on currently. And no, these aren't the official names. (I struggle with titles)

BirdFlash Slowburn HS/College AU:

BirdFlash w/ powers and superhero stuffs, and they also go to the same highschool. Current plan is to only have Dick and Wally attend the same highschool, but we've got some other supers of their generation in the hero side. Super slow, and long. Identity shenanigans, Dick is a theatre kid, they won't confess until in or after college (but don't worry it, opens on senior year), they will be Robin and Kid Flash at the beginning but will morph into Nightwing and Flash just cause I want to play with a little bit of cannon. probably gonna be super long, and will take me a year or more to complete.

Captain Marvel Lawsuit:

Both carol and billy (in their respective universes) facing lawsuits and media backlash, because they copied off of a fictional superhero. So, we've got the Avengers helping Carol, and Jon and Damian and some Justice League helping Billy. In Carol's (the Marvel universe) DC is the main comics company. And In Billy's (the DC universe) Marvel is the main comics company. Idk, just thought it'd be funny cause it's a real lawsuit between DC and Marvel. And I don't really like them calling Billy 'Shazam', because that's his power activation thing and it just seems weird, he can't even introduce himself as a hero.

Avengers Vacay Shenanigans:

Basically a crackfic of shenanigans. Like, they're staying at a rented cabin for a week or so. And what place would have enough rooms? So roommates, I think they might almost die for the sake of breakfast, and there may be the slightest bit of angst (which will just be me projecting about my own angsty mac and cheese experience onto Clint), other than that relatively fluffy shenanigans that would ensue on one of their vacations. I'm definitely pushing both friendships and relationships in this one. Current plan includes WinterFalcon, estabed Scott/Hope, Clint/Loki, platonic Science Bros, platonic Steve + Bucky + Sam, platonic Clint + Sam (honestly, geeks), platonic Bucky + Loki (admiring their geeks), platonic Natasha + Thor (competitive besties?), ect.

HalBarry Domestic Dreams:

Similar to a Superbat idea from frownyalfred,(https://www.tumblr.com/frownyalfred/738620242981470208/fic-idea-a-world-where-clark-and-bruce-both-get?source=share), like I think that's where this idea originated from. Simply thought it months later, and had to hunt down the og for this post. ANYWAYS, Barry and Hal have been having the same dreams, a continuous plot of a domestic life between the two. But it's kinda weird to mention to your coworker that you've been having ultra realistic dreams about being in a relationship with him. right? So they both stay silent. However, they know things that they wouldn't know if it weren't for the dreams, random phrases, or actions, all that fun stuff. So, cue awkwardness. Might be a bit of a slowburn but not as much as the BirdFlash one.

BatArrow bonding over billionaires, kids, vigilantes, and the fucking media:

the media basically forces Bruce and Ollie into a relationship, after seeing them having lunch together once and that was a business meeting. They end up fake dating, for the media, then they start to see the benefit of having another single father billionaire around. So they bond over that, and start to become official. Eventually they have the inevitable superhero secret identity reveal, and turns out their dating the coworker that they only tolerate. But they learned to love each other in the hero side too. They just deserve some love. Where else to get it from other than your childhood friend/repeated hookup/coworker?

[khristie16]

Table number six p.5/...

pairing: charles leclerc x fem reader summary: first kiss or last kiss? warnings: mentions of sex word count: 2,2K

notes: :* @laneyspaulding19 @f1obessed

The rest of the morning was wrapped in the same vibe. You did the most talking and Charles was quiet. You started to get use to that. So what if you are the one do the talking and he is just listening, or at least trying to look like that. You didn’t have energy to think about why is it like this between the two of you.

What are you gonna wear?

Charles pulled you out of your thoughts. You were lost at what he was implying.

What do you mean? For the dance of course.

Ah, the gala event you’ve been politely invited by Pascale. As you told Gabriel if he wants to go with you, he agreed and wanted to come up with the details of matching the two of you together but thanks to his curious hands you haven’t had the chance to talk about it.

I really don’t know. I haven’t thought much of it. Well you should, it’s in two days.

That is true. It’s two days, it’s gonna be glamorous and all and you don’t even have a dress, not even the idea of which to buy!

We’re gonna go shopping. What?!

Charles made you to go shopping with him, he didn’t give you a chance to disagree whatsoever. If you disagree I can pull out right here and you can nicely go home by yourself. It was harsh if you had to be honest but as you’ve been taken aback by such behaviour, you chose to stay frozen instead of fighting back. So now you walking next to Charles in your comfy clothes in the most fanciest place ever to buy a fancy dress. You immediately thought of the movie Pretty Woman, you hoped they won’t kick you out as well…

Try these. Charles I’ve already tried like thousands of them! Yeah so thousand more to find the right one.

You just snorted at his statement and felt extreme annoyance within you. You just hate your guts sometimes! Why are you so childish about this.

Try these.

Charles handed you another one. They were red and quite goldenish at the same time, strapless, cinched at the waist with a slit from the side down. It went straight to the middle of your thigh so it looked proper and not slutty.

So? Give me a sec.

As you took a look at yourself you grasped. Way too loud because Charles opened the curtains and saw your reflection in the mirror. You looked at his reaction and it appeared that he stopped breathing for a sec. Gulping a little he restored his posture and spoke.

They are perfect. Right? I cannot believe how well they look. They fit you well.

You took a look into his eyes and you saw the same intense feeling from him as before in the library. You started to think about what it’s about. But you were currently so full of yourself looking spectacular you switched back to the mirror.

Clothes make a person. No- you make the dress look great.

And with his saying, he disappeared once again behind the curtains.

Charles I saw her in that dress, looking fantastic. I cannot even describe properly. I just knew if I’d stayed any longer in the cabin with her, I wouldn’t hold myself no more. I’m fucked. It’s a fucked up situation. There is no one on my mind as much as she is. No one ever made me feel this way in such a short time. She makes me act silly. Going shopping with her so I can know which colour of her dress it’ll be. So I can match… like a foolish boy. Is this what falling in love feels like?

After your shopping he pulled you off to your apartment saying goodbye to you. No kisses, no hugs. He is really confusing you. Opening the door to your apartment you meet your bestie.

Heyyyyy. What’s up girl?? Ohhhh, hey! You know, the ordinary. One guy is hot and cold toward me and the other one made me full of him. Girl!! You gross as fuck!

You had to laugh. You always joke when you’re in a situation that is unfamiliar to you and somewhat uncomfortable. Gabriel was fine, but the way Charles made you feel was making you uncomfortable.

I went shopping. You? Yes me. Without me?? Girl are you serious- I didn’t plan it okay? It was Charles's idea.

You knew what was coming next. Plenty of questions. You went to make yourself a coffee to go all through it.

Girl he went shopping with you? Like are you aware he is a guy?? Hahahah girl of course I am.

You were way too aware, you thought about his cock way too much then it's comfortable for you to admit it.

He has to like you. I knew it. What!? Well first the library then this. Who would go shopping with you just like that? I’m sorry??

She was right though. You knew where she is heading. It was way too boyfriend girlfriend thing to do. You never believed in friendships with guys. They always wanted to fuck you as you always found out, or at least kiss you or take you out on a date.

You went to bed even more confused thanks to your conversation with Mary.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

The day after tomorrow came quickly and you found yourself preparing in your bathroom. Gabriel was to arrive just in a minute to pick you up. You haven’t seen each other since the morning with Charles. You think he got scared away a little bit.

Hey! Hi Gabriel. Damn YN you look amazing!

He himself looked handsome. Wearing a black suit with red tie. You thanked him and kissed him on the cheek. He smiled at you big and you thought to yourself How beautiful I’d be to see Charles smiling at me like that…

You were just about to get out of the car but Gabriel inhaled sharply, it didn’t missed your focus. You waited for him to speak.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Do you have something going on with him? W-what?

You of course knew what he was asking you about. But even you didn’t know the answer. It made you mad, you looked stupid yourself.

Ehm no, no. He has a girlfriend after all.

He titles his head to the side as if saying you that doesn’t matter in his case. You gulped at that and tried to refocus on something else. Beside, you have a long evening in front of you.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

The whole place was a mess. A very fancy one but so much people you lost focus. Gabriel offered one's arm and this way you continued through the crowd. Your eyes wondered elsewhere till the last moment you’ve heard a familiar voice.

YN!!

As you looked around, you saw Pascale with open arms to hug you. You let go of Gabriel to which you forgot about as well to your surprise and hugged Pascale back.

Wow this place is huge! And so beautiful. I cannot take my eyes from the decor. Haha I saw you were in a different universe.

You smiled back at her and scanned the other people around you. There was Arthur with his girlfriend and Lorenzo with his number one, yet talking to somebody else as well. And then there was Charles, looking at you first before you noticed him. You didn't miss that he was wearing a burgundy blazer.

Your dress is gorgeous!!

Pascale wheezed at you taking you back from your trance.

Merci, I got help with them.

You smiled at her but you and Charles knew who it was for.

And who is this young man? Oh- I’m sorry for my manners. I’m Gabriel. Nice to meet you! Nice to meet you too!

They greeted each other and continued speaking in French. You thought of taking something to drink while Gabriel will talk to Pascale, but you took a one look again on Charles and his side. Of course his girlfriend, wearing green dress. You thought that maybe it’d be nice for her to wear a white dress, so they could make a monegasque flag out of them. Which doesn’t make sense and you don’t even know why you think such thing. Getting your awareness back to Gabriel, he put his hand on your back and smiled at you cheekily. You’ve reciprocated with a yearning you’d like to have a drink.

As you were taking the first sips at the round table at the bar with Gabriel, he confessed.

You know, Pascale is so great. Very nice lady. But him, I’m not quite comfortable here. We haven’t had a good interaction the last time.

You get it. It wasn’t pleasant even for you. But you didn’t care actually. You just wanted to sip some drink, dance a little and go home. This whole event is not even about you guys being together and chatting, it’s more of like being nice and polite and do what you’re supposed to do at these events. So you just gave Gabriel a cold shoulder and asked him to dance with you instead.

I’m not a very good dancer. Doesn’t matter. It’s a slow song.

As he finally grabbed your hand and led you to the dance floor, you’ve put your arms on his shoulders and hands behind his neck. You’ve remembered how you fucked him three days ago and somehow it felt for you like it has never happened anyway. It was getting blurry.

You know I’m glad you asked me to go with you. Yeah? Yeah

Gabriel now looked into your eyes and smiled nicely. You actually thought he is sweet, that he is way too nice for you. Thanks to the sound of breaking glass, you turned you focus on your group of people. Charles's girlfriend was running away and your eyes locked with his. It was unreadable for you. But you felt that somehow this message was for you.

What happened?

Everyone looked at Charles. But all he did was shrug his shoulders and went back to you.

Gabriel- can I have a dance with your girl? YN?

He reached his hand to you and waited. You didn’t know how to act. You were frozen, glued to your feet on the ground.

Yeah, sure….

You looked at Gabriel seeing him looking at Charles not in a nice way. Yet Charles was looking only at you, not even giving a glare to him. You reached for his hand and he held you tightly with his. Leading you to go beside him you stayed quiet the whole way to the dance floor.

Nice dress

He whispered to your ear while placing his hand on your lower back. You wanted to back off because what in a hell but he swinged you around making you dance to a rhythm of tango. The whole time you just focused on his moves. You followed his body like he is giving you instructions on how to behave. And you thought to yourself if it’s this like having a sex with him as well.

One big turn and body on body tight in squeeze. You started too lose yourself in his scent, in the way his body was close to you. It was suffocating your mind. His thighs brushing against yours, just if he lifted a little his leg and touched your hot core right now, you’d melt in his embrace. You felt powerless with him. He was making you a jelly out of you. This all making you confused in your world.

With the end of the music, you’ve only heard how hard you were panting and aiming for air. You still held yourself with your touch of his broad shoulders, with your mind elsewhere.

I never knew you could dance like that Charles! Yeah, the only time I saw you dancing you were looking like a chicken on electric shock.

His brothers were messing with him but all you needed right now was a fresh air. As you looked around the room you saw Gabriel is not here.

Where is Gabriel? He left.

You furrowed your eyebrows, trying to find answers in their eyes but all there was a message You surprised by it?

Charles I need to- No- Charles I need some fresh air Oh- of course

He let go of you and put his hand on your hips. Showing you a way out.

Why are you doing this? Doing what?

You looked at him. You two were now outside, cold wind making you cool down a little. There was no emotion. Nothing! You grew frustrated with him. Grumping to yourself you looked on the ground again.

I know you feel something to me too..

Those words made you shiver. You’ve left your mouth open to his words and finally you saw something in his eyes, it was longing.

I don’t know what this is, I just know it’s you. Me? Yes. You.

You were confused at his meaning. You still didn’t grasp at the fact he confessed that he feels something for you. When you stayed quiet he made steps towards you. Grabbing you by your jaw to face him properly. He looked at you from above and smiled. You gulped and waited to what’s come next. When he grabbed you by your hip to make you turn with your whole body facing him and tightening the squeeze to feel his hips against your own, your knees shook. He slowly started to get close to your face when you spoke.

Charles we cannot! Why?

He furrowed his eyebrows, smirking a little as if you ask the dumbest question on earth.

You’re in a relationship! Not anymore.

With this confession, he leaned into you and kissed you.

[clatoera]

Picket Fence is Sharp as Knives Chapter 2: Barefoot in the Wildest Winter, Catching my Death

Heeeeeey. Welcome back, I call this a mini chapter. It's still almost 3400 words. Thats insane of me. This chapter is

Clove centric/ Clato

20 months after the war/ 7 after the epilogue of ARWBFB

Ironic because the starbucks I wrote this in was so cold my fingers were fucking numb, which you will understand the irony of once you read it.

This is not..intense. It's just a palate cleanser after the Glimmer Prequel I posted this week. I think everyone needed it. I honestly wrote it because we got 10 inches of snow last week and currently are getting multiple more inches as we speak.

Anyway!

Chapter title from Evermore (Taylor Swift)

Masterpost

AO3

Theres also a good bit of cashmere/enobaria mentioned in honor of @bodyelectric77 giving me brain amoebas. I'm just going to tag @kentwells because this whole sequel is your fault. Anyway! Love y'all! love the besties! love everyone! ( I just..love love),

By virtue of the location, the widespread villages littering the biggest mountain range in Panem like sprinkles atop a cupcake, District Two gets substantial snowfall. The kind of snow that allows an extra industry for capitol elites to come and pretend to live like a district citizen in a heated, maintained cabin on the mountainsides, where people can party and celebrate the simplicity of a winter snow in the way that only someone who doesn’t have to worry about keeping heat on can do.

 If you were a child in the district without the commitment (Privilege? Curse?) of training, you could celebrate heavy snowfall with snowball fights followed by hot chocolate with your friends in one of your living rooms. If you were a trainee, a possible tribute, snow meant drills in the cold, running despite snow reaching your knees, agility trials on ice. If you were a trainee with just enough of a rebellious streak, snowfall meant you snuck out with the other kids in your class and rode makeshift sleds down the hills otherwise used for terrain testing. And if you were a trainee that got caught, snow meant laying on your back in a bank of it, in shorts and t-shirts, until your skin burned and your body ached. If you were the right kind of District Two training kid- the punishment was worth the glimmer of childhood you got to experience. 

The snow was not even the worst part– District Two was extremely cold. Not the type of cold where the cute jackets and scarves produced in District Eight would be sufficient, but the type of bone chilling cold that it was a miracle the majority of the population did not freeze to death by the end of a particularly bad winter. The academy just factored the weather into training– figuring out ways to layer, to stay warm, how to get rest in these types of conditions, and how to keep at peak performance despite below freezing temperatures. The embarrassment of a tribute losing because they lost grip on a weapon (“because of the weather” is an unacceptable excuse), is deeply ingrained in any child who has gone through training in District Two. They considered it to be a privilege to train in such harsh conditions, a leg up on competitors of how to deal with what could be thrown on them in the arena. Weather was not an excuse for failure.

Clove, of course, knows these things. Years later she can handle Brutus’s remarks about her clumsy frozen fingers almost ending her life, but at the time it was an insecurity that was fortunately never addressed due to the scandal of her long-term hidden relationship and accompanying secrets coming to the surface. 

Despite her games being a literal arctic blizzard, the snow and the cold had not bothered Clove in the immediate after her games. Sure, there were times where if she closed her eyes long enough on her porch that it felt like she was back in the arena for the briefest of seconds. However the heat of adrenaline that rushed to her chest brought her right back, and when her eyes would fly open and land on her Victor’s Village yard she’d be snapped back into her new reality. A reality of survival and victory.

She was even somewhat fond of the snow, with the recollections of childhood, of times her and Cato had snuck out back in the dead of night to “practice” in the wintry conditions. 

“If it weren’t for your hair you’d blend right in.” Cato teased, but his hands slipping under her arms and knees revealed that he meant business. He tossed her, as hard as he possibly could, into an adjacent snow bank, where her tiny teenage body did indeed slip under the entirety of the pile. The fifteen year old girl would have in fact blended in if not for the deep espresso color of her hair. And the constellation of freckles all over her skin. And the deep evergreen color of her eyes. None of which, Cato knew, were normal details to notice about one’s training partner. 

The brief distraction would always be enough for Clove to grab him around the ankle, pull his feet out from under him, and bring him tumbling down right into the snow beside her. 

They’d always sneak back in with icicles in their hair, water dripping off their clothes as the snow melted away, and a redness that danced across both of their noses and cheeks. Sometimes the only thing that could properly warm them up after was sharing the same dorm room bed, with snide remarks from Clove about how he may as well be a human heater. While those remarks may be snide, they were never a complaint that is. 

It wasn’t snow after her games that bothered her, and truthfully, last winter hadn’t even been too terrible. Maybe somewhere, some cosmic control of the universe decided the people of District Two (realistically, the people of all of Panem) had suffered enough the previous year during the war. A couple of inches here or there, temperatures that dropped but never quite hit that bone chilling type of cold they were so familiar with. It was cold but not cruelly so, and that was nothing short of a miracle considering how many District Two citizens were displaced and without housing as a result of the rebels’ bombing. Those signature temperature dip and the blizzards would have been catastrophic to a district that was already facing such immense population loss. 

Now, over a year and a half since the conclusion of the war, brutal weather was back to strike their home with a bite. 

Multiple feet of snow combined with temperatures plummeting to near zero, both confirmed what Clove knew was coming: Winter in District Two was back with a vengeance. 

While Cato had been thrilled to have a classic District Two winter; to take his little sister sled riding, to introduce her to hot chocolate and the power of a hot bowl of soup at the end of a day in the cold (courtesy, of course, of Clove), Clove had truthfully been dreading the impending storm. 

The cold, quite frankly, hurt. 

It did not hurt from the biting sting of cold wind against flesh or because of tingling fingers and ears from too long outside; no, it hurt deep in her body, in every single movement of her joints. It hurt like her skeleton was crackling, like the marrow inside her bones itself was forming ice crystals that shattered with her movement. It wasn’t just the flexion of her fingers and shoulders that hurt at this point. It hurts to exist. It felt like her ribs were cracking with the expansion of her lungs. With every step, a dull pain inside of her hip sockets begged her to stop moving and just rest. She hadn’t been prepared for every joint that had been dislocated and every healed fracture to remind her that she was never truly going to be able to heal from what Snow had done to her. 

Clove, for the first time, understood what they meant when they called it bone cold. And holy shit did it hurt. 

She tried the rational and logical ways to warm up. She tried a shower with water so hot it should have blistered her skin off, but only slightly brought her down from the feeling of ice in her veins. She layered on two, three of Cato’s already oversized sweatshirts, swimming in layers of clothes that made her look like a child playing dress up without any warmth radiating deeper than her skin. She had laid in bed, weighed down by a comforter plus another ten pounds of throw blankets, that didn't even touch the ache inside her. 

All this is to say that Clove tried a lot before her desperation for any comfort resulted in her current position. On the floor…in front of the fireplace… both on top of and underneath the same ten plus pounds of blankets she had dragged downstairs with her. Even this, the combination of blankets, heat, and Cato’s clothes were only enough to slightly tamper down the ache. 

Still, it was apparently just enough for her to fall asleep that way, because the next thing Clove knows, she’s being gently shaken awake with a foot on her shoulder hearing the panicked whispers of “Babe….babe…Clove..babe…Clove..are you alive?” That can only possibly come from Cato, who is insistently shaking her awake. “Clove?”

“Hmmm?” Clove murmurs, peaking one eye open to glance up at the man oh so kindly waking her. He stands over her, flecks of snow melting on the tips of his hair, cold water running off the black waterproof fabric of his coat and onto her face all the way down where she lays under him. “Move back, you’re making me colder.”

“Are you okay?” He nudges her again, but kneels down to closer to the same height as her. He reaches out with an ungloved hand, and the second his icy fingers touch her face Clove recoils into her blanket shell. From this height Clove can see the redness along his cheeks and over his nose that makes him look closer to twelve than twenty three. “Why are you on the floor?”

“I’m cold Cato, and it really fucking hurts.” She whines, tucking her hands into the blankets with her. “I can’t get warm.”

“Right..okay…did you try the bed–”

“Do you think I laid on our living room floor without trying the bed first?”

“Okay, what about those really hot baths you like, I can take you-”

“Cato. I tried it. This is all that helps.” Clove whimpers, rolling from her back onto her side, facing the blaze in the fireplace. 

“I’ll be back just… Give me like..fifteen minutes.” Cato stands, and is already taking long strides upstairs before Clove even gets a moment to ask where he’s going. 

She lays there for what feels like years in the glow of the fireplace, in the warmth it irradiates and the minimal relief it provides. She feels the presence of him behind her, the light tugging of her blankets, before she sees him. 

“Don’t unwrap me, Cato, I’m warm-”  Clove protests, but when she feels large, warm hands sliding under her layers and practically wrapping around her torso she melts. “You’re warm, oh my god.” 

She doesn’t see him smirk, but knows him well enough to know he is, before he twists her to face him with the easiest twist of his wrists. He flashes her a grin, before pulling her flush against his bare, warm chest. Clove notices, absently, the way his wet hair falls just over his forehead how it did only in the immediate time after he showered until it dried.

“I’d prefer hot but I'll take it.” Cato taunts lightly as Clove buries her cheek against his chest, right over where his heart. “Comfy?” He teases, and a furrowed brow and a single narrowed green eye looks up at him in protest.

“Very.” Clove sighs, curling into him as his hands travel along the skin of her back and bringing heat with them. “You’re like a personal heater.”

“You could have called me, Clove…” Cato reminds her, tucking one leg over both of hers, using as much surface area contact as he could to bring her relief. “I would have come home.”

“You were with your sister, I wasn’t going to interrupt.” She doesn’t mention the embarrassment, the humiliation even, that she felt at the newest physical reminder of her time in the Capitol. A girl who used to love the snow, who loved the cold, now in pain greater than she’d ever admit to her husband. There were some things she didn’t even want him to know– her reduced pain tolerance, being one of them.“How did she like it?”

“She loved it!” Cato lights up, his smile reaching all the way to his eyes as he recounts his afternoon playing with his little sister. “Mom about killed me when she found out I was letting her go down the hill alone, but she had fun. No bones were broken.” 

“Mmm, remember that time we found a trash can lid, and I sat on your lap as we went down that big hill behind the training center in the middle of the night?” Clove muses, freeing her hands from her blankety protection and tucking them against his abs. She holds back a giggle at the way he flinches away from her cold touch, his muscle flexing under her fingertips. 

“You mean when we slammed into the brick wall and thought you broke your nose? And the giant bruise on my forehead that looked like you decked me with the handle of your knife?” Cato muses, wrapping Clove even tighter in his grasp, smiling to himself when he realizes that all the layers she used to try to insulate herself are his.  “Of course I remember.”

“Your entire body weight landed on me and crushed me into the wall, yeah, I thought I was broken.”  She wants to lift her head to scowl at him, but she is simply too warm, too comfortable, too safe right now to care. “You were giant, then, too.”

“We’re just lucky it was Brutus that punished us, not Enobaria.” There is a fond smile on his face as he thinks back to what cannot even be considered a simpler time –surely, laying on the living room floor with his wife, no games in sight, was far simpler than being fourteen and grasping for a glimpse of childhood– but certainly a nostalgic memory. 

“Lucky? He made us run four miles barefoot, Cato. I would have taken whatever Enobaria was going to throw at us.” Clove tucked her icy feet against his for emphasis, and Cato actually flinched out of the way that time. “See? You still don’t like cold feet.”

“Speaking of Enobaria…doesn’t she have that hot tub, why didn’t you go over? She’s in One isn’t she? You would have had it to yourself…” One would have thought, twenty months into sharing custody of Enobaria with Cashmere and District One, they’d have gotten used to her schedule, used to her not always being readily available at their beck and call.  

So many things had kept Enobaria in District Two, of course, in the past thirty some years of her life. Be it the limitations of interdistrict travel, the secret nature of her relationship with Cashmere (who had her own limitations, of course, considering the extent of the Capitol’s influence and abuse on her for over a decade), her commitments to her district and training, or maybe even Clove. Many reasons had existed to keep the Victor woman home, and now in the dawn of a new country, Enobaria had taken her well deserved freedoms. 

Of course, that did not mean that they could keep track of her. 

Some may go as far to say that Clove, Cato, and even Brutus, missed her sometimes. 

Not that a single one of them would ever utter those words to her.

“I thought about it.” Clove sighs, turning her face to press the other cheek against his skin, equally warming her face. “But they’re actually here, I guess they’re here for a while…until Glimmer has the baby. Cash wants to stay in One for a few extra months straight after, I guess, so they’re making up time here for now. And I did not want to interrupt something over there again, especially not in the hot tub…” She shutters, not from the cold this time but from a distasteful memory that she clearly has brought to the surface. “Besides…I didn’t really want to go outside.”

“It’s kind of funny that Enobaria and Cashmere act like kids with divorced parents…back and forth back and forth to split their time evenly. Why don’t they just stay here?” Cato raises an eyebrow, a coy smile on his face. “District Two is obviously the better option.”

“Cashmere can’t leave her brother and sister, you know that. And she’s definitely not leaving now that Glimmer’s gonna have a whole kid soon.” Not just a kid, a little girl, a fact that Clove had to hear from Glimmer multiple times a day. “It would arguably make more sense for her to move to One if we’re suggesting permanent moving..and you know she isn’t going to leave here.”

“Enobaria would never survive with a neighbor named Rhinestone.” 

Clove’s laugh is muffled against his chest, but he’s right. Splitting their time, like kids traveling between homes on holidays, was going to be their best bet. It didn’t make it any less funny, to imagine the mentor they all know and love spending half her time there.

Her laugh fades as her smile falls, and Clove can’t bring herself to meet his eyes. “I’m sorry I have to lay on the floor like this, I know it isn’t comfortable.”

“Clove..”

“I’m serious. This is just another new weakness, I guess. Just another thing Snow took from me.”

Cato’s hand slips off the skin of her back and Clove bites back a groan at the loss of warmth, before his hand holds the exposed side of her face. He doesn’t force her to look at him, simply strumming his thumb along her cheekbone. “Clove? I will bring the mattress down here, and we can sleep in front of this fireplace for the rest of Winter, hell, for the rest of our lives if it makes you feel even the slightest bit better. You aren’t weak, babe. I don’t even know if I could have survived what you did. You were tortured. And if this is how winter is going to go, this is how we’re going to survive it. Together.”

The composure she had tried so hard to maintain crumbles like the facade it is, and the gasping breath she takes startles Cato to the point that he has to look down at her.

“It hurts to breathe, Cato. My lungs hurt and my ribs hurt and it hurts to move and it hurts to bend my fingers. It’s like I'm frozen inside and it hurts.” Clove gasps out, burying her face firmly in the center of his chest. “I didn’t think i’d be in this much pain because of some fucking weather.”

Hurt. Pain. Neither words that Clove would ever admit to, not to anyone else in the world. To anyone but Cato, they made her a target, they made her vulnerable, and they made her weak. 

“I know, Clove. I know.” He admits, bringing his hand back down to her side, warming her up from the inside of her shirts. “I wish I could take it for you.”

I wish I could take it for you. 

What a gesture that is, in District Two, where pain makes you weak and vulnerable. To be willing to carry that burden, to take on that proverbial target. Only among District Two, would the admission of pain and the subsequent willingness to take it be such a marker of love. 

“I just feel like someone could take me out so easily and i’m so useless right now and-” 

“Noone’s coming after us. Noone’s going to take us out. And if they were, I think I’ve got it covered. I’m a Victor, too, you know.” Cato promises, bringing his lips down to kiss the top of her head, where she is nearly trying to burrow into his skin for the warmth he so readily provides. “I’ve got us, Clove. Pretend it’s my turn to keep watch in the games, okay? Sleep…relax..I’ve got us.”

“Am I gonna get a turn?” Clove nearly teases, and he can feel her lips quirking into a smile against his skin. 

He snorts, and somehow manages to pull her closer. “Once a snowman isn’t your biggest opponent, sure.” 

The pinch he feels on his side is enough for him to know that she was going to be just fine.