#mc jesus
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luxthestrange · 7 months ago
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Obey me!Memes #188
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irishmammonagenda · 4 months ago
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Belphie blinks at you in greeting as you slide under the covers with him, only humming gently when you hold onto him for dear life. Dark indigo eyes noticing with interest that you haven't even started getting ready for RAD yet---not that he was one to talk---the Avatar of Sloth merely gives you a lazy smirk and wraps his tail around you under the covers as you whisper a strangled out, 'hide me'.
He nods slowly, his throat feeling much too heavy, and he himself feeling much too lazy to use his words. A pale hand pulls the covers over your head, just in time too, as Lucifer bursts into the room, ruby red eyes shining like a wolf on the hunt.
"Have you seen MC?" The eldest asks, paying no mind to the usual sound of morning chaos coming from the rest of the house.
Belphie lets out a strangled, lazy, "Nope." all the while his tail tightens around you.
Lucifer shakes his head. Looking at the you shaped lump under the covers. Merely pinching the bridge of his hooked nose and sighing, "MC. If you wanted a break from RAD, you could've just asked instead of opting to hide."
You pop out from under the covers, eyes wide like a deer in headlights, Belphegor's arms wrap around you from under the covers, his eyes sleepily tracing the features of your face as you speak.
"Right.....yeah. Sorry Luci?" You tilt your head, the Avatar of Pride's eyes soften a fraction.
"Be sure to catch up on your schoolwork, we only have room for one academic failure in this house and I'm afraid that spot has permanently been reserved for Mammon." Lucifer says sternly, though you can see the faintest upward quirk of his lips.
"Aye aye Captain." You nod, sleepily saluting the eldest.
"Belphegor."
Belphie turns to look at his eldest brother.
"Just because MC has a day off school, it doesn't mean you have one. Your uniform's hanging up by your desk." The ebony-haired demon walks out of the room.
"...Diavolo fucking dammit."
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sleepyminty · 7 months ago
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I absolutetly love character whose eyes are just void with a small red things inside, staring at you like a prey, a target
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masterblooky · 1 year ago
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I feel like everyone is underestimating how connected to everything is this season. Lizzie, Jimmy, and Mumbo’s death was connected to like five other things.
Gem opening the portal is like the root of half the incidents on the server
Everything that’s happened feels like a large cosmic coincidence. Everything is so closely intertwined. It’s brilliant. Everyone and no one is to blame for anything.
for example if everyone went to Lizzie’s birthday, she would have never gone invisible horse riding to cheer herself up and even if she did she would have the health to withstand Jimmy’s attack. But on the other hand, if Joel hadn’t been the only one to come, she wouldn’t have gone to the end to help him out.
so who’s to blame? Gem? Joel? Everyone else? Lizzie herself?
And then returning to everything being a coincidence, (mentioned this in my other post but) Martyn going red in the end and Lizzie, the first red, dying in the end. Lizzie watching Martyn fall off and then Lizzie falling off later on.
Gem bringing (almost) everyone to the End. Lizzie failing to bring anyone to the End. The two of them being the substitutes last season.
Whenever Scar is given a chance to be on a team with Grian on it he has a task preventing him from doing so
Everything has been a coincidence or a result of falling back on careless habits.
So when there’s no more room for coincidence. No more habits to fall on. Gem, who’s new and has no old habits to fall on, who has a Reputation for bloodshed, can be used to start the chaos all over again and begin the self perpetuated cycle all again.
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arvandus · 11 months ago
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barbatos headcanons sfw or nsfw? totally fine if not <3 i love anything you write for barbatos <3
Ohhhh man, so many headcanons considering how much space he takes up in my brain. Most of it centers around relationships and, by proxy, NSFW stuff. It ties into what I recall of canon material, but take it with a grain of salt since I haven't finished the OG game yet (I'm on lesson 42 right now). I'm just going to put SOME of them since I have so many. Also, some of these will probably sound more like character analysis than headcanons.
WARNING: MINORS AND AGELSS BLOGS DNI; THIS POST CONTAINS 18+ CONTENT. DO NOT, I REPEAT DO NOT FOLLOW ME!
My Humble Barbatos Thoughts:
General stuff (SFW):
He smells like warm bread and spices due to all the baking/cooking he does and the tea he grows and brews.
When Asmo painted his and Diavolo's nails to match the brothers (per Diavolo's request), Barbatos let Diavolo choose his nail color for him.
His biggest worry is the mistakes of his past coming back to haunt him by inadvertently impacting Diavolo's reputation by association. If Barbatos's past sins became public knowledge, he would worry about how the Devildom might view him and how that would impact Diavolo.
Because of how incredibly old he is, and the way he seemed to come into Sol's life when he was a teenager (if I recall correctly?), and came into Diavolo's life when he was also young, I see his relationships with them as almost parental/guardian (at least initially).
Which means he probably doesn't really have any truly balanced/equal relationships with those around him, which can cause him to be somewhat isolated. He's there for others, but he's not very willing to let others reciprocate. He believes he needs to handle all of his troubles/worries on his own.
I can see his dynamic with Diavolo evolving into a more equal/balanced friendship over time, the parental/guardian dynamic falling away as he let's go of his protective role. I think this has already happened with Sol, since they seem more friends/equals than father/son (e.g., he allows Sol to have power over him not just in pact, but also with his grimoire); Diavolo is harder because Barbatos still sees the young prince as his responsibility (plus Dia is always trying to sneak out like a teenager 😂).
Barbatos has a LOT of talents and interests; he may be very proper and well-mannered, but he's been around for a LONG time. Canon things we've learned about him so far: he likes heavy metal music, he likes classical music, he is great at ice skating, fangol, and chess; he kills it at cross-dressing and dancing... he's a very diverse individual which tells me he did and tried probably literally everything when he was younger.
He's 10/10 middle-aged adult energy now. He's done everything, experimented with all the things, and now he just wants stability. He's still got some spunk to him and will engage in fun activities (especially for the sake of others), but if he had his way, I think he'd want to relax with his tea, his gardens, and his walks under the stars.
Relationship/Intimacy (including NSFW):
He had plenty of lovers earlier on in his life, but he didn't exactly have a lot of emotional intimacy. He's always been the oldest demon, and when he was younger, that simple fact made him arrogant and he saw himself as always being above others. It drove an invisible wedge between himself and those around him.
He's a greed demon, so I imagine that in the beginning he was more emotionally charged and selfishly motivated.
He has literally tried every kink under the sun moon. Young Barbatos was kinkier, hornier, meaner (due to his arrogance), and likely was not a very healthy individual to engage in relations with. Probably had lots of red flags. Was very free-spirited (our boy was hopping timelines will-nilly);
Young Barb had fuckboi energy, but in a quiet, intelligent sort of way (if that makes sense). He was hard to resist, yet very much untouchable.
As time passed, he mellowed out but also became more reserved. This made emotional intimacy even harder, and sexual escapades grew boring after a while.
Young Barbatos certainly got around, but he only truly fell in love once. But he had to leave that person behind when he made the decision to go back and fix his mistakes. He still thinks about them to this day.
In the past, when he saw the consequences of his recklessness and how it had impacted those he cared about (Dia, Sol) he had a change of heart and devoted himself to fixing his mistakes and to be in service of others before himself.
It may seem endearing and like excellent character growth; which it is, to a point. But it's also reactionary to the harm he caused. Barbatos sees his passions and desires as something toxic, something negative. As such, he sees them as being something that needs to be bottled up and controlled at all times.
Which makes it so much harder to fall in love, and when he does fall in love, it will scare him, because he feels that pull of selfishness, of wanting purely for the sake of wanting it. He has yet to figure out how to find balance within himself (i.e., trust himself), to allow himself to want without letting it consume him, and to give without self-deprivation.
Monogamous or poly? I could see it going either way, although I see him leaning more towards monogamous. It's the greed and also how he isolates himself; letting in one person would be hard, letting in more than one, especially to the same extent, would be nearly impossible. He's a VERY private person.
But poly can also work as long as its established that the relationship is exclusive between him and his partners (no open relationships/flings with outsiders). Poly might also be nice for him in that he can take comfort in knowing that his partners are there for each other when his work keeps him away from them (i.e., he'd hate for his monogamous partner to be alone all the time).
Either way, mono or poly, Barbatos does not like to share. It's the greed in him. They're his, and no one else's.
Barbatos would be very VERY resistant to entering a relationship in the present time mainly because he's dedicated himself to Diavolo. He knows his partner would not be able to be his top priority no matter how much he loves them, and not many people would be okay with that.
Barbatos used to be very sexually promiscuous in his younger years, but now he's completely closed off simply because has a reputation to protect for Diavolo. He doesn't want any jilted lovers/ex-lovers to try to cause trouble for the Prince of the Devildom simply to get back at Barbatos. Also, the man has no time for shenanigans.
If someone does manage to worm their way into his heart, it would be very slowly, over many years without him noticing until he suddenly realizes one day that he'd be lost without them. It'd be jarring for him, to say the least.
Barbatos is canonically VERY romantic. He's a giver, and his love language is acts of service. That includes not only errands/duties/chores/meals/dates, but also physical acts of service (massages, orgasms, etc.).
Loves LOVES to give oral. He loves making his lover(s) putty in his hands (think service dom).
Lots of kissing. So so much kissing. He's gonna worship every inch with his mouth and tongue.
Definitely does have a kinky side, but it only comes out to play with someone he really REALLY trusts.
He'd be down for nearly everything. Bondage, anal, edging, etc. He can even be a mean dom if you ask him really nicely (he needs to believe you REALLY want it before he lets that old side of himself come out to play); however, the only things I can see him having a hard no on would be anything in a public space where there's a chance of being seen/caught (remember he's worried about reputation) and hard degradation via name-calling (sorry, I just can't picture it - he'd respect his partner too much regardless of whatever nasty kinky stuff they do together).
Will most definitely use his tail on himself and his partner(s).
If his lover is human, he'd be constantly keeping himself (and his strength) in check out of fear of hurting them.
He'd be big on consent. He's a master at reading body language; the slightest hint of distress and he's stopping everything immediately. He's not one to lose himself in the moment.
However, this doesn't mean he doesn't have the capacity to be passionate; it's just that his passion can be a bit strong, so he's always worried about overwhelming his partner. But if his partner can handle it, then it'd open up an entirely different side of him.
Despite his capacity for kinky shenanigans, Barbatos's favorite type of intimacy with his partner will be more vanilla and filled with lots of love and affection. So think lazy oral on the bed or couch in the privacy of his room, missionary so he can see your face and feel your legs wrap around him, and you in his lap so he can let you have control and wrap his arms tight around you.
Barbatos is the KING OF AFTERCARE. Baths, tea, cakes, warm blankets, firelight, soft touches, gentle massages, kisses to your cheeks, your temples... and very heartfelt verbal confessions of his love for you.
Will snuggle you tightly after all is said and done.
Loves watching you sleep while he holds you in his arms.
He'd never say it out loud because he doesn't want to burden you, but getting up early each morning and leaving your warmth is the most painful, torturous thing for him.
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metalgrateeater · 7 months ago
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hi goofy goofers
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shoutout to @/scoob316 and @/spiritual-turg for the plutonian(s) (i totally didnt give up on eomry what ever do you mean) and the funny little mooninites with their funny little hats check out their art its so cool suace
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can hyou tell we watched a goofy movie
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choices-binglebonkus · 5 months ago
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That magical moment of seeing the Blades 3 AI cover for the first time <3
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temis-de-leon · 1 year ago
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My period is coming and I'm already depressed so my mind goes to dark places sometimes and I was taking a shower when i started to think.
(This makes no sense and I wrote it in a hurry because I will forget about it later, so don't think about it too hard.)
What if the mc had a really close bond with their siblings? A healthy loving bond (something Mammon is hardly ever in the receiving end of) that made him think about his current possibilities and his past choices. A bond that made Mammon crave a brotherly relationship where he's not a permanent joke and not constantly punished or humiliated for his sin.
He wants what mc has, but, of all the things he can steal, their family is not one of them.
His envy grows corrosive and so does his frustration. Surely he's not the first demon to ever want to escape the Devildom, right? Certainly not under Lucifer's watchful eye, but if there's a will there's a way.
Or maybe... Maybe. Maybe he can reject his sin? Is that even possible?
Greed is what causes his brothers' disgust, so maybe getting rid of it is what could grant him the opportunity to feel so beautifully loved.
Diavolo wouldn't let him, of course. Hell, Lucifer would probably hang him upside down for a millenia for even having the idea. Mc however... They're a powerful sorcerer, a diamond in the rough, and, luckily for him, his friend. His best friend, actually.
Testing his self control and not selling every ancient book in the library was hard, but doing the research with mc made it fun and new and exciting. The human sure had a love for risks and adventures; and breaking already forgotten Devildom laws was not going to stop any of them.
But they should've been more cautious. They both should've thought about all possible outcomes.
Getting rid of Greed was the easiest part of all.
Needing to find a new recipient was a task he didn't expect to have.
Watching mc, the closest body to the magic, becoming the new Avatar was something Mammon didn't know he never wanted to witness.
The human wasn't powerful enough to survive his previous punishment and his responsibilities as a ruler. Their body would crush from the inside out, their blood would become toxic and he would be there to watch the horrible torture.
What had he done?
Masterlist
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fluffydice · 7 months ago
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And the truth of it all is Yumehara should have been allowed to continue being a workout fanatic…yeah maybe she wouldn’t have kept that ‘feminine’ shape she wanted but think about it. Straight, boxy frame of ripped. Thinking Nikki Snelson in Legally Blonde:
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Yeah that’s the one
EDIT: I know Saiki K might seem like the only thing I do but I also love musical theater and. Come on. This is insane. I love her:
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iwrite-sinsandtragedies · 1 year ago
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Here comes the—
B-oyy~♡
Hello boyyy😂there he iiis~!
[prev.]
Look at the little Micha boy! He's such a little star!! Definitely that kid that people either love or hate, I think, lol. He's proobably gotten a little better with those social cues (maybe) but he's still very confrontational - he's that kind of person that's always questioning things and looking at them from every angle. His teachers don't know if he's a blessing or a curse tbh. Most adults probably feel that way about him!
He's very protective of Tamarack and very sweet on Autumn. He goes between He and They but gender is still a pretty dodgy subject to him, honestly - he doesn't really get the point of it beyond scientific and medical relevance. Overall, even if he seems a bit cool on the exterior and doesn't make friends easily, he's actually a pretty good and thoughtful kid and puts the work in for himself and others.
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akurui-shizen7 · 2 years ago
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Luke: Good morning.
[MC]: Good morning.
Simeon: Good morning.
Solomon: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit.
Thirteen: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS
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666writingcafe · 1 month ago
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Michael's Report
Zephyr is not as they seem. Not only are they not a demon, but they aren't of this time. Their actual identity is a human named MC who comes from an alternate future universe where the prince's school flourishes enough that he's able to establish an exchange program across the three realms. MC was accompanied here by the sorcerer Solomon, and apparently they're his apprentice. So, as the youth would say, red flag number one.
Number two would be their relationship with the brothers. In their world, MC has formed pacts with all of them. An ordinary human shouldn't have survived that process that many times, especially with all seven Avatars, which suggests that they are no ordinary human. I now understand your concern completely, for a human powerful enough to control the Avatars of Sin could spell destruction for the Celestial Realm and threaten your position of power.
But, I hear you say in my head, we were able to defeat the brothers last time. How could a human change our odds of victory should another war emerge?
And to that, I'd say that the brothers wouldn't be alone. MC has some amount of control over the prince, his butler, the sorcerer, and even one of our own. Not through magic, but something else: love. For reasons unknown to me at this moment, everyone I've mentioned is drawn to MC like a bunch of tiny moths surrounding a flame. If something were to happen to the human, I have no doubt in my mind that they would tear apart the very cosmos just to save them.
MC appears to be their idol, and I do not say that lightly. If it weren't for the nature of their appearance here, I would suggest we eliminate the threat immediately, but the damage that would cause to the fabric of space and time would be far greater than anything the human would be capable of doing. However, once they return to their place in the universe, we need to draw up plans. If we can get them to cooperate with us, then we can avoid another war, but if not, then we can't be caught off guard like last time.
Taglist: @lost-in-time-wanderer, @fuzztacular, @dianedancer18, @sweetbrier2908, @flare-love, @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf, @thunderlightning351, @l3v1chan, @anxious-chick, @5mary5, @expressionless-fr, @tenkobitch, @budbuddnbuddy
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irishmammonagenda · 9 months ago
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Boop!- Obey Me x Reader
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Summary: You go on a mission to boop, as per usual chaos ensues. Word Count: 3.5k Warnings: Female Reader (implied), i dont really think there's anything else but if you can see something lmk and i'll add a warning
very obviously inspired by tumblr's boop event
dividers by @saradika-graphics
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"Hello Michael!" You greet, signature foxy grin on your face. Michael looks up from where he's playing Connect Four with a man in robes and waves at you.
"Hiya MC!" He puts the palms of his hands on the soft cloud ground and leans back on them, he's bare chested in the heat, though he's adorned himself with waist beads and arm bands, firm muscles on display. His long curly blond hair is in intricate braids, small ornaments threaded through it. He grins up at you, bright red eyes shining under the light of the Celestial sun. "What's brought ya up to the Celestial Realm today?"
"I am evil. I am very evil Michael." You say seriously.
The other man laughs, though not unkindly. His tanned skin shimmers ethereally under the light, dark brown eyes stare up at you, rich like soil after the morning due. Dark waves and soft curls frame his face, some soft stubble one his jawline, barely noticeable. "I'm sure you're not evil." He says kindly.
You stare at him, before smiling as well, touched. "Aww thanks! And you are?"
The man smiles, reaching his hand up, Michael takes that time to sneakily move one of the coins the man had put down a slot over. "I'm Jesus, it's nice to meet you MC."
You cough. "You're Jesus?"
"Yes." He nods, "A lot of people are shocked when they first meet me...something about expecting me to look like Da Vinci's gay lover."
You nod, dumbfounded.
Michael, sensing your inner turmoil, and also needing to keep Jesus' attention elsewhere so he could continue cheating- winning creatively in Connect 4, clears his throat, "So what's brought you to the Celestial Realm and made you claim that you're evil?"
This makes you grin, "Well, my dearest Michael....have you heard of boops?"
Michael straightens up a little bit, Jesus watches him intently, before fixing the board to its original state whilst the Archangel is distracted.
"No I have not...Why, what are they?" Michael asks, signature mischievous grin on his face. "They sound fun."
"Well I'm glad you asked Michael!" You grin, before leaning in and whispering into his ear. The added proximity made you realise he smelt of pine cone and fresh rain.
Michael giggles evilly, turning over to Jesus, before reaching a dark, jewel adorned hand and booping his nose. "Boop!"
Jesus just smiles, Crucifixion was worse. "It's your go, Michael."
"Oh of course! MC wait for this game to be over! I have...uh..business to attend to in the Devildom!"
You and Jesus share a look.
Michael looks over at you two, "You coming Jesus?"
The man smiles gently, "No thanks, I'm still traumatised from that one time when Satan tormented me in the desert."
"Oh okay...." Michael deflates the tiniest smidge before looking back at the board, spluttering. "Hey you moved the pieces!"
Jesus snorts, "Yeah, I moved the pieces back from where you tried to cheat."
"Lying's a sin." Michael huffs.
Jesus laughs, "Was that an admition of guilt?"
Michael falls onto his back dramatically, dark skin shining in the Celestial Realm's blessed light. "Ugh! Woe is me! This is worse than the time that one Irish kid got me confused with Michael Collins!"
Jesus pats his shoulder in pity. "Easter's a hard time for all of us."
Michael blinks at the scars on Jesus' palms from the nails and bites back a very bad Cross joke. "You could say that again."
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After the game of Connect 4 ended, (Michael lost) you and the Archangel said your goodbyes to Jesus and began your journey down to the Devildom. Michael walks beside you, a good bit taller than you. Michael having swapped out his less than covering attire for a flowy white flare sleeved top that you'd imagine a pirate or a Victorian would wear, the lace buttons are undone for the most part, as per usual. You'd come to learn that the Archangel hated top buttons with a burning passion.
"I call Lucikins." Michael says with about as much seriousness as a 10 year old calling shotgun on the front seat of the car. So very serious.
"Fine. I call Mammon." You reply, looking up at him, as if daring him to try and boop your first man before you could. He pouts, but relents.
"I call Satan then." Michael blinks back at you with crimson eyes.
"No why?" You sulk.
Michael shrugs. "He's my nephew. I get to boop his nose it's the law."
"No it's not."
"Yeah it is!"
"Prove it then." You huff.
Michael turns around and you hear fidgeting before he hands you a paper napkin with writing on it. You notice the fountain pen he sneakily snuck back into his trouser pocket and glare at him, before reading the napkin.
The Eleventh Commandment: Thou shall let Michael boop his nephew's nose.
You hum, "Something's telling me this is fake."
Michael gasps incredulously, as if offended by the very notion, he places a hand over his breast, where his heart is. "How dareth thou! Truly, 'tis a crime against nature to speak such filth about the Holy Word. A crime against God I daresay!"
"Okayy...drama king."
Michael gasps again. "Alas! Thou speaketh such filth! Such blasphemy to thee! Thy words...such horrors! Cursed are thou amongst humankind!"
You deadpan. "I'm taking away your Shakespeare rights."
"Try it I dare you." Michael challenges, red eyes gleaming with something predatory. "You can boop Simeon."
You grin. "Yay!"
"I call Luke."
Your grin drops. "What the frickety flip that's my son."
Michael's brows furrow. "He's my son too what the flip."
You gasp, bringing your hands to your mouth. "Did we?..."
Michael's eyes widen, he pulls his top up and counts his ribs, losing count several times because you keep adding random numbers in. He looks up at you.
"Did we have a child out of Wedlock?!"
You and Michael look at each other in object horror. Both conveniently ignoring the fact that Luke technically came into existence millennias before you.
"I think we did...." You place your hand over your brow like a Victorian woman seeing the ankles of her secret lesbian lover for the first time.
Michael follows suit.
"Michael....I fear we might be sinners...."
"Well you know what they say in the human world MC...." Michael sniffles, looking away from you dramatically. "Sinner sinner chicken dinner...."
You pause, breaking character. "Is it not Winner winner chicken dinner?"
Michael shrugs. "Not like I care."
You parrot his movement, shrugging your shoulders back as well, before the horror creeps back onto your expression. "But...Simeon and Barbatos also see Luke as their son...."
Michael looks at you wide eyed, grabbing you by the shoulders, "MC! We have to count their ribs!"
You put your head in your hands, "Two angels, a demon and a human with angel blood that's somehow an angel....our son is a hybrid!"
Michael gasps. "Hybrid princess?"
You do a double take. "Why do you know what gacha is." You breath out, looking at Michael in genuine fear.
"I wasn't a gacha kid don't worry! Levi was though! He'd show me his little Gacha stories that he made...." Michael looks nostalgic. "Such an adorable little weirdo....he gets it from Lucifer y'know."
"If I described Lucifer as an adorable little weirdo I think he'd skin me alive."
"That sounds like a you problem." Michael grins.
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You and Michael continue your journey down to the Devildom, only this time he's giving you a piggy back ride because you annoyed him until he agreed. Strong hands hold your thighs to keep you from falling, as your arms are wrapped around his neck.
You had been 'calling' people to boop.
"I call Diavolo."
"Deal." Michael nods, trying and failing to twist his head around to face you because you're on his back and he's not an owl. "I don't want to accidentally start another Celestial War by booping the Prince and acting King of the Devildom's nose."
"That's surprisingly a good reason."
"Fuck you mean surprisingly?" Michael scoffs, though there's no real bite to it. "I'm always having good reasons."
"Yeah and I'm the spawn of Satan." You say sarcastically, human world side winning over for a second, until you remember that Satan is in fact a real person and that you are in fact now in the Devildom.
Michael laughs, "You know who Satan's the spawn of? Lucifer."
"Don't let him hear you say that."
"What's he gonna do? Bully me while I'm in a desert? Jokes on him, I hate sand and don't go anywhere near it."
"I don't feel safe anymore, we're gonna get jumped."
Michael laughs.
"I call Levi, I need to return an anime to him anyway." Michael breaks the silence.
"You borrow animes from Levi?"
"Yeah sometimes, me and Saint Peter watch animes at the gates of Heaven when it's a slow day and not a lot of souls are being guided into it."
"Nah imagine dying and waking up in heaven to see the people at the gates watching anime."
Michael sticks out his tongue, though stops when he remembers you're on his back and can't see it.
"I call Barbatos."
Michael sighs in relief, carrying you through the streets of the Devildom. "Thank God, you can have him. Good luck with that."
"Go fuck yourself Michael. I call Thirteen."
Michael gasps excitedly. "Tell her I say hi!"
"Tell her yourself."
Michael huffs. "You're so mean to me MC."
You bite his neck, really embodying your inner feral street cat. He yelps. "Don't try to steal my wife, next time I'll bite your jugular pretty boy."
Michael laughs, "I am quite pretty..." He flips his hair, the intricate golden braids and curls hit you in the face, seeing as you're still on his back. You let out a sound similar to a feral street cat coughing up a hairball, he laughs again. "Also I'm pretty sure Thirteen is a lesbian."
You perk up. "Oh yay! You should be the priest at our wedding Michael. You don't have a choice."
"Fine." The archangel huffs, his plump lips pouty. "But only if Luke's the flower boy."
"I was gonna make him the ring boy giver person." You reply, playing with one of the ornaments braided into Michael's hair.
"Even better!"
Moments of comfortable silence last before you decide to break it because you're evil and have no moral code whatsoever.
"Michael you can have Solomon."
Said Archangel halts. Dropping you off of his back before turning to look at you, now strewn out on the ground. He puts his hand over his brow like a Victorian man who just saw the ankles of his gay lover. (Probably Solomon: You'd decided.)
"No! How couldeth thou?" He sighs dramatically before it just turns exhasperated. "Those rumours just died down...."
You jump up off of the ground, wiping the soil from your clothes, "They have?! Dammit!"
Michael deadpans at you, pulling at a golden coil of hair and letting it be stretched straight before letting go and watching it bounce back up into a curl again. "I hate you."
"That's harsh."
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After having separated from Michael, you sneak into your First Man's room. He sits lazily, lounging on his bed and scrolling mindlessly through his DDD. So enraptured he doesn't even notice your presence just yet until you press your finger to his nose.
"Boop!"
"ARGHH-" he screeches, jumping atleast five feet in the air before realising it was you and scoffing. "Oh...It's you...o-of course ye'd wanna boop the Great Mammon's nose! That'll cost ya!" He huffs, trying to avoid the initial embarassment of you seeing him so uncool!
"Boop!" You boop him again, he grins stupidly like an idiot inlove, before snapping out of it and putting his 'too cool for this' persona back on.
"T-that'll cost ye! MC!" He stutters, trying to cover his blush.
"Oh will it now?" You raise a brow before bringing your lips to his nose and pecking it there, pulling away again in less than a second. "Boop."
He pulls you in for a hug before you can pull away completely. You grin, having reduced the Avatar of Greed to a blushy pile of mush in your arms.
Take that Alpha Male podcasters who think women want dominant mean men who suck and hate them. Everyone knows all women want a Mammon.
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You and Michael meet back up again. Michael having a scratch on his leg.
"Satan did not like the fact that I booped him at first...until I gave him an emergency kitten that I put in a cage nearby like 5 minutes before." Michael says, noticing that you noticed the scratch. "He almost bit me! He's definitely Lucikin's son!"
You point and laugh at him. He pouts, before interlocking your arms. "Purgatory hall?"
"Purgatory hall." You nod.
Michael knocks on the door. Luke answers it before gasping like a child on christmas. "Michael! Hi!" He hugs the Archangel who laughs and picks him up.
The blond boy notices you at that point, he smiles brightly. "Oh MC! Hi!"
"Hiya Luke!" You smile at him, booping his nose. "Boop!"
"Michael follows suit. "Boop!"
Luke blinks before grumbling. "I'm not a child..." He then turns his head back towards Michael who's still holding him. "Boop!"
Michael laughs. "Do MC now!" With that he quickly moves closer to you, Luke still in his arms, and the young angel boops your nose too. You all grin, laughing. Luke just ecstatic that Michael was able to visit. And he brought you too!
You end up watching a movie together, all three of you. Simeon comes home halfway through it. Having had to visit a publishers. Michael hides behind the door and when Simeon opens it, the dark skinned angel pops out, booping the poor man. "Boop!"
Simeon blinks at him. Michael smirks lightheartedly "Get booped Loserboy."
Simeon smiles, his gaze turning toward you." MC would you lie any help with your Solomon x Michael fanfiction? I heard from Satan that you two were on hiatus."
Michael groans. "Traitors!"
You laugh. "Get fanficked Loserboy."
Michael grins, putting on faux dramatics. "You both suck I'm going back into Luke! At least he's actually cool."
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After a lovely movie with Luke, Simeon and Michael, you run away to a cave because why not?
After entering Thirteen's very lovely abode, and avoiding all of the traps laid out for Solomon, you finally catch a glimpse of her vibrant ombre hair.
"Hiya Tee!" You grin, pouncing on her and pulling her into a hug. The reaper, who's clearly batshit insane doesn't even flinch, she just laughs, hugging you back even tighter.
"MC! To what do I owe the pleasure babes?"
You giggle michieviously before bringing your hand up and, "Boop!"
She grins wider, bloodied emerald eyes staring back at you so lovingly, hints of playful devilry in her expression.
"Oh let me try! Boop!" She says before pulling you in for a kiss that makes your knees feel weak.
When you both pull away to catch a breath, you breathe out breathlessly. "That was a super boop....an evil boop even..." You say, face burning red, you know she feels the red hotness of your cheeks.
She just laughs. Tilting her head, some strands of hair falling into her face. "You want another one?"
You've never nodded quicker in your life.
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"How in Diavolo's name did you get in here?" Lucifer asks, looking up from the work on his desk. He quickly closes over the confidential files and paperwork, turning his head to Michael once more. Blood red eyes narrowed at their counterpart's.
Michael approaches the Demon at a speed that could rival Mammon's. In an instant he's beside the raven-haired man. "Awww Lucikins don´t worry about it! Boop!"
Lucifer swallows thickly, and flicks his gaze to Michael. Despite having the glare of a thousand suns on him, Michael continues grinning. "Did you...did you just boop my nose?..." The Avatar of Pride asks in a low voice.
"I'm not too sure if I did..." Michael puts his fingers to his chin in mock thought, before grinning, pointer finger in the air. "I'll have to do it again to make sure!" The Archangel exclaims before booping his younger brother on the nose. "Boop!"
Lucifer growls. "Michael-"
"Yes, Lucikins?"
"Michael I am going to kill you."
The elder only laughed, "Awww classic Lucikins! Still in his teenage angst phase!"
"I did not have a teenage angst phase." Lucifer glares, huffing embarassedly, turning away and picking up his quill in an attempt to turn away from this god awful conversation.
Michael gives him a knowing look. "Don't make me pull out the photos."
His head snaps back to his elder brother. "What photos?"
"The photos of you with the wolf cut, the ones with you and the eyeliner, the ones where you're all dressed up in your little emo costumes..." Michael wipes a tear from his eye. "Oh...you were so adorable! Always threatening to murder me...! Glad to see that my wittle baby brother hasn't changed!" The Archangel exclaims, pinching his younger brother's cheeks and making them squish up, Lucifer felt his face flush with embarrassment. Michael laughed, he looked like a chipmunk!
"...'m no' a 'ittle ba'y bro'er! you'r tw' minu'es ol'er than 'ee!" Lucifer tries to shout, but with Michael pushing his cheeks together, it comes out muffled and distorted.
"All I heard is that you said I'm the best big brother in the three realms and you love me very much!"
Lucifer glares at him. A glare that doesn't hold any weight seeing as Michael is still squishing his cheeks together and he still looks like a chipmunk.
With enough squirming and fighting, Lucifer finally manages to get out of his brother's grip, he rubs his cheeks, staring daggers at the angel. "I would never say that. I'm not your baby brother. I'm not Lucikins. You're two minutes older than me yet two centuries more immature." He says venomously.
Too bad Michael's poison proof.
The Archangel laughs, "You're not my baby brother? Huh? Who's bed did you climb in when you were scared of the thunder back in the Celestial Realm?"
Lucifer bristles, swallowing thickly, "That's irrelevant."
"Sureee." Michael grins, though it's softer around the edges, Lucifer feels it too.
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Lightning flashes in the Celestial realm. Long before Mammon had even been born. Thunder roars, a small whimper sounds. Lucifer sits in his bed, covers over his head, gripping a pillow tightly. Barely even a cherub, he takes the slight break in the storm to gather the courage to waddle over to his twin's bed.
"Mikey?" Lucifer whispers in the darkness, gripping onto the poles of the bed with his tiny pale hands. "Mikey...you awake?" He says through gapped teeth, a slight lisp in his voice. The gap between his two front teeth would close with time.
The sheets rustle, a young Michael groans, also barely a cherub his voice is as high pitched and childlike as his brother's. "Luci...go to sleep..." The slightly older cherub says, eyes still closed.
"Can't Mikey...'s too loud.." Lucifer whispers, black hair sticking to his forehead in a slight sheen of sweat. As if to prove his point, thunder roars again, lightning flashes. Lucifer whimpers, gripping the pole tighter.
Michael sits up sleepily, short curly hair tied in the tiniest protective braids possible, some small blond coils escaping their confines at the edges of his head. The older cherub wipes a small, chubby hand over his eyes and yawns before opening his duvet up just enough so that Lucifer could climb in.
"Make sure...go to sleep Lucikins..." Michael whispers tiredly, covering his yawning mouth before abandoning his teddy bear and putting his arm around his little brother instead.
Thunder sounds again. Lucifer stiffens and lets out a small sound. "Mikey...'m scared..." He grips onto his twins matching pajamas tightly with his tiny little hands.
Michael grins sleepily, red eyes staring into his twins same coloured ones. "Don't worry Lucikins! 'm always gonna p'tect you! That's wha' big brothers are for!"
The thunder still sounds, Lucifer still stiffens slightly,but surrounded by the warmth and comfort of his twin, he manages to sleep soundly.
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After all the madness and badness. (Devil face emoji) You and Michael meet up in a Devildom café.
"That was productive!" The Archangel grins.
"Indeed it was Michael....indeed it was...." You say, a blissed out look on your face.
Michael arches a brow, "Is that one of Thirteen's leather jackets?"
"Maybe..." You say dreamily, playing with the sleeves.
Michael just laughs at you. "Get it, I guess! Anyway wanna watch Gilmore Girls with me? I need to catch up with Raphael...he's a few episodes ahead of me."
"Of course I do."
Michael brings his hands together in an imitation of a fly on a wall doing the hand thing. "Excellent."
.
.
.
"Do you think Luke's going to grow up to open a coffee shop?"
"Nah, he'd open a bakery."
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this is utter bullshit and utter dogshit idek
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aworld-inpink · 3 months ago
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levi and mcs relationship isn't gay or straight it's a weird fucked up third thing
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boxdstars · 3 months ago
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dumb and dumber
based on this post where like three people wanted to see my other ocs in the HL universe
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fourswords · 4 months ago
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actually. four swords link 🤝 minish cap link: getting pulled into some weird fucking alternate dimension that looks like space to do battle with vaati. like where the fuck are they. what's his deal with doing this
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