#mc is a self insert
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of course my self insert is in my creepypasta slenderbrothers slendermansion AU. DUHHH>?!>!!>!>
part 2 coming soon prolly
#my art#art dump#sketches#slenderman#slender mansion#slenderverse#creepypasta fandom#creepypasta#creepypasta art#creepypasta fanart#crp art#crp#crp fandom#crp fanart#creepypasta au#slender au#creepy pasta#mc is a self insert#slender is confused
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downloaded om! again to jog my memory, i wont him so bad
#my art#i drew this during a mass within christian school grounds#obey me#obey me shall we date#obey me mc#obey me leviathan#obey me levi#obey me levi x mc#obey me self insert#self insert#oc#original character
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Blacked out in front of my tablet and woke up with sketches of my Touchstarved mc + Kuras my beloved. woops
#I found out dr. kuras is 6'6 I said hold on lemme get a stool so I can climb this man#touchstarved#touchstarved game#touchstarved kuras#kuras#sleepyscribble#oc.emma#my mc is meant to be a self insert but also like. I wanted to come up w a design and character arc and everything jkvkvk#so I ended up basing her on my personality/looks but taking her into a direction that would fit the game#she's like. me but 'characterized' and a bit exaggerated for the sake of being a character yk#the way she turned out is that she's basically a friendly happy go lucky mage who laughs at her own misery but hides#a deep layer of self loathing underneath all that bc of her curse#having been cursed all her life she believes she's a monster and the sunny personality is a way for her to 'make up for it'#but at the same time she feels like a farse. like she's only luring ppl in to an inevitable demise#and she thinks she's selfish bc despite knowing the danger she poses she still goes out there and puts herself among ppl#bc she craves human connection. even tho she feels guilty for 'indulging' in it#anyway I love the cursed mc concept in this game <3 it's been really interesting to think abt how that would affect someone#also I kept her physical features looking pretty much like mine#bc I wanted to draw myself in a cute way. teehee#but the clothing I was basically thinking like. early game simple clothing that she didn't rlly pick for herself#and maybe later I can have an updated design w something she would actually pick for herself
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Hi, I read your post about wanting request. If you didn't mind, can I ask headcannon + story where MC being slapped by their friend until she bruise, and the Lads men just come when her friend is in middle of shouting some unkind words to her and they see her bruise?
Hi sure but I do hope nothing like this happened IRL and if it did, Iâm so sorry! But anyway, enjoy!
Warnings: violence, misogyny, murder mentions â ď¸â if that is bothersome to you, you can skip to Zayne, Tara, and Rafayelâs parts which are less violent
Tags: angst, comfort, f!reader (she/they)/MC. I added Tara, hope you donât mind.
[Iâm considering the friend to be a guy in Sylus and Xavierâs case, and NB in Zayne, Tara, and in Rafayelâs.]
(Premise for Xavier and Sylus)
You didnât know why heâd do that. Your friend called you out to the park where youâd hang out after training on your way back home. You never considered him close, but there he was, in front of you, pouring his heart out, shocking you with details about you that you did not remember telling him. Your heartbeat grew faster from stress, a small relief knowing the watch on your wrist would send a distress signal to him.
âSo, will you go out with me?â He smiled with his teeth, eyes widened.
âUh,â You laughed in hesitation, not saying anything substantial, looking behind you to see if he had arrived. âIâŚâ
But before you could say anything more, his expression turned angry. âYouâre waiting for him, arenât you?â
A slur left his lips, and before you knew it, you were on the ground, ears ringing, and your cheek burning. You didnât expect it, and it only âhitâ you, a few moments later. You had been slapped, and hard. Usually, youâd clap back immediately, but were stopped by what he called you over and over again. Those words youâd heard before, which haunted you, and froze you, hurting far worse coming from someone you considered a friend.
Xavier
Hmm, so in such a situation, I think Xavier, based on his lore would straight upâŚâŚ. Yeah. Of course, heâd try to hide it from you, but if he saw this happen, he wouldnât be able to hold back at that moment.
In one of his tender moments (the one where sheâs treating him to drinks), such a situation does happen, but MC wasnât hurt there. I think this behaviour would be his response to MC being physically and emotionally scarred.
Xavier, arriving at the park, did not even think to assess the situation. He saw you on the ground crying, and immediately lunged at that hunter in front of you. Camaraderie meant nothing to him in front of his beloved crying. It was impossible to see him coming.
You had no idea what happened, but a glowing light surrounded you, familiar and comforting. Xavier kneeled down in front of you, pushing your hand out of your face gently, his jaw tensing as he saw your bloodied lip and red cheek. The ringing in your ear had stopped, but the echoes of those words didnât. You pulled away from him, hugging your knees, trying to say something, but you knew if you tried to speak a single word, a flood of sobs would come pouring out your lips.
Red eyed and red faced, you looked away from him.
â[Name],â He tried, his voice gentle. âCome to me, please.â
He looked at you with such tenderness, you couldnât resist. You finally sobbed into his shoulder, with him holding you lightly, stroking your back. âLetâs go home,â He whispered. âIt must hurt, right?â
You nodded, finding your way to his back, nudging him. Xavier chuckled. âYou demand a piggyback ride from me like itâs your right.â
You wrapped your arms around his neck, as he lifted your thighs around his waist. âYouâre my knight in shining armour after all.â You mumbled weakly.
You couldnât see it, but you were sure Xavier smiled. As you left the park, you tried to glance back to see what became of your former friend, but Xavier stopped you abruptly. âDonât look! Itâs not a pretty sight.
Iâll get Jeremiah to clean up later.â
Sylus
Well, you already saw what happened in his story, right? Heâs a criminal, so he wouldnât hesitate to off that person, but heâll spare you of the sight. Iâm not sure if heâd make the person suffer thoughâŚ
If you heard hurtful words, heâs going to tend to those SO tenderly, and assure you that all of that was nonsense.
You promised to meet Sylus after work, texting him that youâd be a bit late because your friend had something important to say. His guard was already up at that moment, and when he saw your heart beat rise in the watch heâd given you, he was already on his motorcycle. Sylus felt his world crumble when he saw you listening to such cruel words, hurt, on the ground.
He did not even finish taking his helmet off when his evol flung the man in front of you almost a yard back.
You werenât shocked. It was similar to how youâd first met, and though that was a negative experience, every time heâd come to save you since then had been nothing but warm. You looked up at Sylus, who was a few feet away from you, faint red tendrils on his sleeve. As always, everything was up to you, but this time he outstretched his arms for you.
You ran to him, almost jumping in his arms, crying on his chest. He held you firmly, resting his face on the top of your head. âMy kitten.â His voice, too, was broken, but on hearing him, you nuzzled your face on his torso, earning a bitter chuckle out of him.
âWill you tell me what happened?â He wrapped his coat around you, guiding you to his car, keeping you firmly against him. Luke and Kieran were there too, and on Sylusâ gesture, ran towards your ex friend who you could faintly hear groaning in the background. Sylus was going to take his time with him, and you did not mind.
âIf I do, Iâll cry a lot.â
âThatâs alright. Iâll make sure to kiss all your tears away.â
(Premise for Zayne, Rafayel, and Tara)
(This is kinda insp off kdrama moments LOL)
You stepped in the cafĂŠ where your friend had agreed to meet you. You waved to them, happy to see them after so long, but they seemed to be tense. Right as you approached them, a glass of water was thrown at you, making everyone turn their heads at the commotion.
âItâs all your fault!â They yelled, clutching the glass. âI was demoted because of you!â
You frowned, still giving your friend the benefit of the doubt, asking them what you did. They scoffed, as if appalled by your cluelessness. They came closer to you, and a slap landed on your face, making you turn red immediately. It stung, but not as much as what they said next. âHow did you pass the evaluation and not me? Your evol is terrible, youâre weak, and an airhead!â
Their words drawled on, hurting you like knives to the chest, untilâŚ
Tara
Since she isnât a canonical LI (i.e. her relationship with MC is so far âjust becauseâ), her reaction would obviously be milder.
Sheâd be confrontational to the person who hurt MC, and after the situation is handled, sheâd try to cheer MC up. Sheâd try to distract you, but would also be willing to be a shoulder for your tears if thatâs what you want instead.
Tara stood between you and your friend, reaching her hand out from behind her to hold your arm, as if to keep you safe. âWhat do you think youâre saying?â She asked the fellow hunter, eyebrows furrowed. âDo you even know why you werenât promoted?â
After explaining to the now ashamed friend the reason behind why what happened did, Tara turned to you, holding your cheek. You felt your lip quiver at the gesture, and her eyes widened. âOh, no no no!â She pleaded. She took you outside and sat you down at the outer tables, quickly grabbing an ice cream from a nearby vendor, holding it to your cheek like an ice pack.
You smiled at that, wiping away whatever hint of tears there were in your eyes. She smiled even wider, scooting her chair over near yours. âHow are you feeling?â She asked, her eyes expectant.
âKinda ashamed.â You replied, honest about your heart.
âItâs not your fault.â Her tone was reassuring. âThat person has their Mars in Capricorn, giving them the tendency to blame others for their own faults. Honestly, I wouldnât be surprised if Jenna didnât want them on the team for that attitude alone.â
âHow do you even know their birth chart?â You laughed.
âOkay, I made it up.â She took the ice cream packet from you, opening it and bringing it close to your lips before it started to melt. âBut it was worth it if I got to hear you laugh.â
Zayne
Heâd be very mature about it, and comfort you like a baby. Being a doctor, heâd immediately see to your wounds, and be gentle for the rest of the day.
From what we saw with Carter, he would bear a grudge against that âfriendâ and remember their face in case they visit the hospital in the future. đ
Zayne pulled you away from the prying eyes, the commotion, and the snake you called a friend. Outside, in the shade, he blew on and examined your face, stroking his thumb lightly over where you were hit. Amidst his evaluation, his eyes met your puppy eyes, brimming with tears. So he pulled you in, not caring for who would see.
âShh.â He comforted you as you held his coat tightly. When you finally pulled away, not meeting his face, he put his hand on your back and took you to his nearby parked car, opening the passengerâs side door for you, making sure you were sat comfortably before going over to the driverâs seat. He touched your face with calloused fingers, as if seeking permission to hold you, and so you turned to him, looking at his eyes that always held that look of reverence for you.
He took an alcohol pad out of his pocket, cleaning your face with it, asking you if it hurt anywhere else.
âAre you sure?â He asked when you said you werenât. You nodded, thanking him silently. He leaned over to give you a kiss on the forehead, and tied your seatbelt for you, before putting on his own, and turning the keys into ignition.
âWhere are we going?â You asked.
âMy house. I want to take good care of you, if youâll let me.â
Rafayel
Boy oh boy. I feel like he would be so petty about it.
Although heâd gossip and make jokes, heâd subtly try to check on MCâs feelings too.
You stood there, face drenched in the water your friend threw on you, but you were still in a better condition than them, who had been soaked with paint water Rafayel emptied on them. The crowd in the cafĂŠ watched the drama intently as Rafayel retorted to the insults thrown at you with more snide remarks.
You were wide eyed when Rafayel took your hand, wrapping you in his cardigan, holding your shoulders and taking you to the door, apologising politely to the cashier for the mess on the way out. Outside, he brought his face close to your cheek, looking at it closely.
You pulled away, red from the proximity. âWhat are you doing?â
âRelax.â He stood up straight. âIâm just making sure my bodyguard isnât out of commission.â
âWell, itâd take a lot more than that to stop me.â You mumbled, walking with him. âBut⌠thanks.â
Rafayel smiled, holding your hand in his own. âSo, tell me, howâd you like to get your revenge? Planting some stolen protocores in their third rate bag and then reporting them? Using their number to sign up for spammy websites?â
âNo, Rafayel!â You laughed, leaning your head on his shoulder. âI think just gossiping with you is enough.
#love and deepspace#tara x mc#tara x reader#lads x reader#lnds x reader#Xavier x MC#sylus x mc#sylus fics#sylus x reader#zayne x reader#rafayel x reader#headcanons#self insert#hcs#fanfiction#comfort#angst
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APT. Music video buts I'm self shipping with Percy <3
#keyframes#keyframes vn#percy tozaki#perseus tozaki#keyframes percy#keyframes art#keyframes fanart#keyframes mc#art#fanart#drawing#alemonyoyo art#illustration#artist on tumblr#artist#artists on tumblr#self insert#self ship#yumeship
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//// didnât realize how much affection I could have for a literal face and pair of hands,,, ////
#I got inspired to make mr gap art since thereâs so little of it hehe#homicipher#mojibake#mr gap#homicipher x mc#self insert#homicipher fanart#i have a love hate relationship with him#like Iâm very happy that we get a hug from him that he offered himself but heâs such chaotic neutral psjdksjd#art post
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i may be cringe but i am free
#sorry mammon i know its your birthday but i needed to post these#i didnt think much of solomon in the OG but my god NB made me love him more#also if this wasent obvious mc is a self insert#my art#obey me#obey me mc#obey me oc#obey me nightbringer#obey me solomon#fanart#obey me fanart#oc x canon
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I personally am a fan of the papa crewel hcs and Vils just neat
#my art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland fanart#twisted wonderland art#twst#twst fanart#twst art#twst mc#twst self insert#twst grim#disney twst#twst sona#twst vil#twst vil schoenheit#vil schoenheit#vil schoenheit fanart#twst crewel#divus crewel#they will be scolding her later on how to properly take a photo#a small price to pay
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love at first attempted murder because i out-tism'd you in a trivia game about your special interest
redraw of a comic from 2020 ^_^!!!!
#i havent played om in 2 million years#my art#obey me#obey me mc#obey me shall we date#original character#oc#self insert#oc art
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Insufferably Admirable // Astarion x Reader
Summary: After a restful day turns into a bloody night, your unspoken yet painfully obvious dedication to Astarion has put you in what should be a harder choice. Once Astarion realizes just how far you'd go for him, he has to begin to confront the feelings and realizations he's been ignoring for a while. OR that time You figured out the most effective way to heal a vampire and Astarion got emotional about it
Set at the end of Act 1, but not quite act two. Pre-confession but it's obvious they have some sort of feelings for each other
TW: canon typical violence, blood & blood drinking(obvi this is an Astarion fic), no use of Tav or (Y/N), one use of technical self harm (c*tting) but not in a self mutilation way??, mentions of manipulation obvi, reader might be a little too willing to help (totally not be projecting what???)
this is my first time writing anything for Astarion after hyper fixating on him for a month so please be gentle. I know it's a bit all over the place. (yes I could have completely left out the first half, but there isn't much actual dialogue in the second half and I like to put this guy in situations)
"Remind me again why you insisted on coming with me? I figured youâd be ripe for a day to lay around camp and let us do all the heavy lifting." You grumbled, scanning the crowded streets for a merchant. The goal was simple: get to the nearest village, sell off the extra weight, use the gold to stock the necessary supplies, and whatever the gold couldnât buy⌠well, acquire it by any means necessary. No matter your path, through the shadows or the Underdark, you'd need to be prepared.
Gale had gone to pilfer for useful scrolls and maybe an enchanted item to snack on. Laeâzel and Shadowheart to a blacksmith for specialty arrows, useful armor, and any other weapons that caught their eyes. Karlach had carried the two trunks and barrel of items you had collected from your adventure thus far, finding you a wheelbarrow before heading back to camp to help Wyll with his preparations. Halsin⌠had taken his wild form and disappeared into the forest. Originally, you had intended to do your tasks alone, until-Â
"My dear, Iâm always ripe for a lay." Astarion twisted your words with a smirk, easily dodging the hand that reached to swat his chest. With a short laugh, he answered your question, his theatrics only increasing to more you argued, "To begin with, Someone- my fabulous self- had to make sure you didnât get the whole group wrapped up in another laundry list of side quests- who knows what trouble you could have found if you were left all by your lonesome? A gnoll den? A kraken in the pond? Â an old womanâs wagon with a broken wheel? a kitten up a tree? An orphanage with a leaky roof? Another cult for us to dismantle? Another temple to drop on me? Where would it end? Youâre incapable of turning people away, itâs one of your insufferably admirable qualities."
"Itâs called being kind, you dramatic elf." You grumbled, not prepared for the in depth analysis of your character. Trying not to focus so much on the fact heâd called something about you admirable.
"Second, knowing you, youâd sell all this off and still manage to come back to camp with them full. Honestly, pet, how have you managed to collect this much junk? You donât even have a bag of holding." Astarion scoffed, using a single pale finger to peek under the lid of the barrel. It was just barely containing the countless daggers, goblin bows, pairs of leather armors, and dusty sandals. Your cheeks burned hot- maybe you had a habit of being overzealous in how eagerly you pilfered through all the crates you came across, checking bodies for anything valuable, and demanding the vampire to pick every locked chest the party uncovered. Hells only knew the thrill you got when you would find a buried chest.
"You never know when you might need something!" You reasoned, but swatted him away to hastily shut the barrel before the contents could spill out. It had taken you the better part of the night to pack it full of all the things your companions had convinced you to get rid of. The pale elf rolled his eyes, brushing past you so gracefully you didnât feel his fingers in your pocket.Â
"Really, my sweet? When, pray tell, might we need the collection of rusty necklaces youâve amassed." Astarion held the bronze and silver necklaces up to the light, the red and blue stones sparkling despite the rust. His voice always like velvet, ruby eyes alight with teasing, "Far be it from me to criminalize accessorizing, but that darling neck of yours is tempting enough already."Â
"Astarion!" You cringed, hearing your voice almost whine. Damn him for having that effect, so you cleared your throat as you snatched the jewelry back, "They are useful when we can sell them for gold."Â
Astarion, having gotten the reaction he wanted, let you shove the necklaces back in a pocket before glaring at him, though it didnât hold much actual malice, "Well, come on then, letâs sell the sandals for all the riches the village has to offer us."Â
â
An afternoon later, you were smiling smugly as you watched Astarion grumble. Between all the goods and six different merchants, you were leaving with an additional 9,000 in gold, not to mention the additional 3,000 Astarion had managed to pickpocket while you bartered, and the items the two of you had managed to swipe. You felt particularly vindicated as he complained about the weight of the coins in his pack.Â
"Iâll buy you something pretty in Baldurâs Gate." You cooed teasingly, to âappeaseâ him. Astarion spared you a deadpan glance before standing to leave, only making you giggle all the more, "Letâs get back to camp."
Astarion caught your eyes once more, scowl softening out at the sight of your bright smile. He was just about to say something sickeningly sweet and perhaps more than a touch vulgar when his eyes flitted up to something, pointed ears twitching at something you couldnât quite hear. Until you could.Â
The door of the jeweler you had swindled burst open, a strangled voice shrieking, "THIEVES! SOMEONE CATCH THEM!"Â
Astarion must have been rubbing off on you, because for a moment you tried to feign confusion, looking around for the âculpritsâ as if the dwarf wasnât pointing directly at you. Â Not that it did much good as several passerbys began to circle around the two of you.Â
"Everyoneâs so touchy about their personal belongings these days." The rogue scoffed. Â Astarion grabbed your wrist and tugged you to him, so that your back was pressed to his and no one could sneak up on you. In his other hand, a dagger had already appeared.Â
You sighed in defeat, taking your bow off your back, "No killing."Â
"No promises."Â
Compared to the goblin camp or fighting through the githyanki creche, disarming and incapacitating untrained townspeople and barely trained guards  was barely a warm up. Still, Astarion never left your side, an increasingly common occurrence when you found yourself in tight situations. Together, it didnât take long to put distance between yourselves and your attackers, managing to get far enough to escape to the fight. Deflecting one last blow as the two of you passed by an open tavern, you incapacitated a rather pitiful guard with a blunt thunk from the pommel of your dagger. Taking one relieved breath, you tried not to focus too much of the trail of bleeding, unconscious bodies you and the rogue had left behind in your escape attempt.Â
"Best we stick to the shadows before we attract more attention." Astarion mused with a cruel smirk, grabbing your sleeve and using it to wipe the blood off the corner of his mouth, his fangs glinting in the afternoon sun. The rogue only chuckled at your curses, giving some inane quip about the crime of dirtying his ensemble and how blood someone always looked better on you, "Now, believe what I said about you finding trouble? Back to camp before you find more."Â
Before you could wrench your arm back or remind him that he was the only who got caught stealing, he pulled you off the main road into the alley adjacent- unaware of the attention that had already been attracted from inside the tavern.Â
____
Ambushed in the night. Â
A whole hunting party of Gur hunters. Willing to purge your party as they slept.Â
And they were calling Astarion the monster. Fortunately, Scratch was an excellent guard dog. Waking the entire camp when the hunters tried to creep where you slept. Just as fortunately, there wasnât a soul in camp that didnât sleep without at least a dagger under their pillow.Â
Your camp had become a bloodbath in the dim glow of the campfire. You had used the book you had fallen asleep reading as an improvised weapon, throwing it so hard it broke the first hunterâs nose. Laeâzel was single handedly mowing through three hunter with her long sword. Spells and incantations sent flashes of light from Gale and Shadowheartâs part of camp, and fire and brimstone lit up Karlachâs. There was yelling and cursing echoing in the cool night air, orders to take the vampire spawn alive and to kill the rest.Â
And Astarion? Their target?Â
He was where he always was during a fight these days. Right beside you, like a pale, snarky shadow. He had been the one to press your sword into your hand so youâd have more than just your dagger. Â With him, you slashed and sliced anything that came near. Until the bastard appeared out of no where, squeezing in between you and the rogue. You would have applauded (more likely cursed) the near perfect use of an invisibility charm- had it not been for the poison-dipped stake raised against Astarion.Â
This hunter was different, you could see it in his eyes. They were somehow devoid of life and yet also simmering with rage as they trained on your snow haired companion. This hunter didnât plan to take Astarion back to Baldurâs Gate, not alive at least. He didnât care about whatever orders they had, or what consequences would come for disobeying them. He only cared about driving the stake into Astarionâs heart.Â
Astarionâs eyes went wide as well at the sight of the stake, realizing as you did that this was no longer just a kidnapping, it would be an assassination. Your thundering heart stuttered, blood going supernova in your veins before freezing to ice as your mind whirled through a hundred different possibilities and also went blank. Your own opponent, along with years of learned strategy, were instantly forgotten as blind instinct took over. Â Every ounce of strength and speed you had was directed into a desperate lunge. In your desperation, you really werenât sure if your goal was to tackle the hunter, grab his arm, tackle Astarion, or maybe even take the stake to your chest instead- you decided to choose along the way, as long as it ended with Astarion alive(ish) and well.
You managed to close the distance, one hand planted firmly to Astarionâs chest shoving him further and the other clamping onto the leather of the hunterâs gauntlet, the same arm poising the stake. With a feral sounding shriek, you pushed his arm so his aim was off. At the same time, your original opponent, frustrated at being forgotten, cast a wave of thunder that sent all three of you flying.Â
Astarion, the Gur, and you flew backwards a good fifteen feet, the thunder shaking you to your very bones and splitting your ears. The breath was knocked out of you so hard you thought your poor lungs might collapse and you werenât able to tell if it was the spell or the impact that did it. You didnât have time to contemplate, the moment you were able, you scrambled onto your knees. With the same feral tenacity from earlier, you grabbed the hunter by the front of his leather armor, nails leaving scarily deep tracks as you hauled him off your vampiric companion. Â With your new opponent, you rolled both your bodies until you were on top of him, knee to his chest. Seeing the look in your eyes, the rage left his own, pure survival instinct taking over. You didnât even feel the sting of the slicing blow across your shoulder, too consumed with a singular mission. It was Astarionâs dagger you had snatched from the ground on the way that delivered the quick death blow. Halsin, in bear form, had appeared out of the tree line and took care of your other thunderous hunter, taking a defensive position around you and Astarion with a goading roar. You expected to hear something from Astarion- a snarky comment about your lack of technique, a snide remark about his assailant, or even just a stream of petty curses- but he was silent. You turned back to him, only to have dread flood every cell in your body.Â
Nothing else mattered anymore, not the fight, not your injuries, and especially not your forgotten original hunter. Halsin, in bear form, had appeared out of the tree line and took care of your other thunderous hunter, taking a defensive position around you and Astarion with a goading roar. You barely noticed.
The moment youâd disposed of Astarionâs assailant, you were scrambling back towards the rogue, who was laying all too still. At first, you hesitated to even touch him as if that might make it worse. You called his name once, and then again when you were able to gingerly lay hands on him- one hand to his chest and the other pushing some curls out of his eyes. The stake, what should have been an almost useless weapon against anyone else, was still buried in his chest, piercing his favorite frilled collar shirt.Â
"No⌠Astarion-" Your voice was breaking, thick and raw. Your eyes couldnât rip away from the stake, protruding from his chest, the poison staining the white linen of his shirt a sickly green. The hand on his chest balled into a fist, bunching the unsoiled fabric in your grip, but something caught your attention. The tiniest candle light of hope in the rapidly encroaching darkness of grief.Â
Your hand was directly over his undead heart. Anytime you touched him, your hand always fell directly over his heart. When you teasingly swatted at his chest, when you needed to steady yourself against him, when you needed to catch you balance⌠you always sought out his heart- subconsciously, instinctually, always his heart. Your hand was over his heart, and that gods-damned stake was four inches to the right. A tiny light, but a light none the less. It was then you realized you were calling the wrong name.Â
"SHADOWHEART!"Â
None of your companions had ever heard your voice that desperate, that scared. Â All their heads snapped to where they had last seen you, finding Astarion pulled to your chest as you wrenched the stake out of the spawn. Astarion stirred only long enough the let our a gurgling shout that fizzled into a groan at the pain, and you could only hope he heard your soft apologies before you started barraging the vampire with healing cantrips. You didnât stop until the words held no more magic, your supply of magic tapped for the night.Â
The night air had changed, no longer fueled by adrenaline and challenge, now it was thick with urgency and fear. Each of your companions starting fighting towards the two of you, and when you locked watery eyes with Shadowheart you found her clearing her path with her spear. She had stopped using magic to fight, saving it all for Astarion.
"Iâm coming! Hold on!" She promised as Karlach fell in beside her, battle axe taking over and sending two hunters to the grave together. Scratch and the owlbear cub had taking a lesson from Halsin and formed up beside you, growling into the night with hackles raised and feathers ruffled.Â
"Just hold on, Astarion." You relayed to the vampire, who was completely limp against you his back to your chest, head tilted back against your shoulder which bared his neck to you, showing the fang marks on his pale skin. If you were capable of humor, you would have laughed about the reversal of roles, it was usually you baring your veins to him. But at the moment, his lack of movement wasnât particularly amusing, so instead you laced his fingers through yours, hoping the warmth would bring him some comfort. Â You pressed your cheek against his white curls, using your other hand to brandish his dagger just incase anyone got too close, and whispered all the reasons he was going to be okay. And thatâs how you stayed until camp quietened and Shadowheart slid to a stop in front of you.Â
___
Hours later, Shadowheart had used every healing and restoration spell she knew, not stopping even when she began to sway and sweat. Halsin had offered his magic and healing herbs, Karlach made sure there was always a bucket of hot water and a stack of clean rags available, and you hadnât missed Gale trying to hide the scroll of reviving from you as he slipped it to Shadowheart. Â Everyone in camp had been quick to gather all the healing potions, depositing them at the entrance of Astarionâs tent. Wyll and Laeâzell had slipped into the tree line to make sure the ambush was well and truly taken care of. Â
And you? Their appointed âfearlessâ leader? You had gone uncharacteristically silent. Your heart hadnât left your throat, clenching painfully every time they jostled the rogue. Your hands were shaking too much, both from fear and white hot rage, to really help the two more experienced healers of the group. And the thought of being too far from Astarion made your stomach turn, so you kept rooted like a tree. But, you were grateful, truly, for all of them. Even if in the moment, all you could do was sit beside Astarion and pray to any God or Devil that would listen. You felt like a wild animal in a cage and a helpless child at the same time, your insides very well might vibrate out of the body if you didnât melt into the soil first.Â
The vampire needed all the help he could get. Aside from the occasional heartbreaking groan of pain or agony driven writhing, Astarion was eerily still. Barely breathing, less so than usual. His already pale, chilled skin had taken on a stony complexion, almost gray. And despite the inability to run a fever, there was a sheen of sweat over his face, clammy and uncomfortable. You hadnât allowed them to undress him all the way, but part his shirt had been cut away to reveal the stab wound. It was deep, weeping Astarionâs already dark blood, and stretching out from the injury were black, twisting varicose veins that afforded you the cruel visual of the poison spreading. You wanted to take Galeâs revival scroll, use it on the hunter, and revoke the kindness of your mercifully quick death. Â
"Itâs like the effect of our magic is being dampened." Shadowheart huffed, hands glowing as she cast another restoration spell. The sweat on Astarionâs brow subsided briefly before returning. Halsin nodded beside her, taking a deep sniff of the stake.Â
"His lack of blood isnât moving the potions or antidote through his body fast enough, and this poison isnât doing any favors." The druid thought aloud, taking some of his herbs to make a paste, "It doesnât matter how many we pour down his throat if his body canât absorb them."Â
Shadowheartâs worried gaze flickered to you for a moment, before settling back on Halsin, "Weâll figure something out."Â
You knew she was saying that more for your benefit, but you couldnât bring yourself to acknowledge the pity. Instead, your grip tightened on Astarionâs hand as you swiped a clean rag to dab at his face. There was one more round of healing incantations and one more bottle of healing potion nursed into Astarionâs mouth. Your jaw twitched, watching most of it fall from the corner of his mouth. The same trail your own blood usually made after he fed.Â
"Iâm tapped." Shadowheart sighed almost ruefully, the glow around her flickering and then fading, falling back on her heels. Halsin stood, stooped slightly in the low ceiling of the tent, turning to you.Â
"Weâve done everything we can do. Weâll try again with fresh minds in the morning. For now the best he, and we, can do is rest." His voice was calming, as if he thought you might start screaming again, but you just nodded, muttering something along the lines of thanks for trying, and not meeting either of their eyes as they ducked out of the tent. Â
Since you had belligerently refused any of their magical attempts to heal your shoulder, Gale had done a rather pitiful job of wrapping it, taking some pointers from Karlach along the way. The wizard offered you a tight smile and a gentle hand on your uninjured shoulder before pressing a bottle of healing potion into your hand, "This one is for you. Youâre no good to him if you bleed out all over the floor of his tent. We all know how Astarion feels about waste."Â
"Yeah- fancy boy will be starving when he wakes up." Karlachâs chipper voice was still laced with a sting of concern. The tiefling didnât touch you for fear of burning you, but did leave you with some roasted meat and a carafe of water from earlier in the night, "And it wouldnât hurt for you to eat something either, soldier."Â
Then you were left alone with your thoughts, hunched next to Astarionâs side, tired eyes examining the bottle after confirming the rise and fall of his chest. In your hand, the potion glowed slightly with the subtlest warmth, the scarlet liquid seeming to have a mind of its own as it swirled in glittering patterns behind the glass. Your injuries were meager, this little bottle of healing would have you as good as new. Bitterly, you flicked your eyes to the numerous empty potion bottles in the corner that had barely slowed Astarionâs bleeding. Your hand closed around it as you cast another look to the Vampire spawn beside you. His breaths were shaky and shallow even after Shadowheart and Halsin had exhausted every last bit of magic they'd had. Now in the quietest parts of the night, or maybe the darkest hours of the morning, your thoughts swirled, desperate for any sort of plan to latch onto. You had to do something.Â
For you, Gale had said, No good to him if you bled outâŚÂ Heâd be starving, Karlach had been joking, His lack of blood wasnât moving the potions enough to be effective, that had been Halsinâs hypothesis.
Blood. He needed blood.
The revelation was like being dropped into a freezing lake, determination razing the fearful lethargy out of your soul. With your teeth, you pried the cork out and downed the first circular bottle, the overly sweet taste a stark contrast to the somber mood of the night. For good measure, you did the same with a potion of superior healing and two bottles of general poison antidote, slamming them down so fast you had to ignore the churning in your stomach. Youâd loot twenty more goblin caves to make up for the dent in supplies if you had to, in that moment you just didnât care. You waited a moment, begging the powers that be for your ragtag plan to work, not so patiently watching the bruises on your wrist until they started to fade.
You felt it, the moment that you had been completely healed and there was no where else for that magic to go. And then, you wrapped your arms under Astarionâs, heaving him against your chest. You bared your neck, letting gravity gently swing Astarion's nose to meet your pulse point, his silvery lashes tickling your jaw. He stirred slightly, groaning at the movement, pressing himself into your warmth before stilling again. Was he too far gone to realize what was being offered?Â
Realizing youâd need to play into his vampiric insticts, you huffed, shattering one of the empty vials against a stone, struggling to do so and keep his deadweight in place. Taking a shard, it wasnât hesitation but a moment of stilling your shaking hand before you pressed a shallow cut to your neck, right above where his lips rested.
You hissed at the haphazard sting, not as gentle as the pinprick of his fangs were in the night, feeling the blood instantly pool at the seam, a single red ribbon dripping before the potion healed the scratch, "Câmon, Astarion-"Â
The moment his name left your lips, or maybe it was the moment a drop of your blood hit his, regardless you could feel his instinct, that sanguine hunger, take over. The soft lips at your neck were replaced with dagger sharp fangs digging into where the small cut had been. The sound you let out was somewhere between a gasp of pain and sob of relief as you barred him against yourself, fists clutching into the back of his shirt like it would keep both of you rooted to each other. Somewhere, in the back on your mind, you thought about the irony of the position, being so afraid to let him slip away, like a rabbit latching onto a snake for fear of the serpent starving. Even if it meant being consumed.Â
In that moment, you were so relieved heâd started feeding that you didnât care that his fangs dug in deeper than they ever had before, much more animalistic than his usual polite nibble. You didnât dare flinch or wince, in case that might break the spell. Instead, you focussed keeping the both of you upright, one of your arms wrapped under his own, your fingers splayed across his ribs, and your other hand cupping the nape of his neck. The angle had his silvery curls dusting your fingertips and your thumb caressing the sharpest part of his jaw. Never had you been so happy to feel that throbbing numbness in your neck. Astarionâs chin prodded further into your neck, deepening the hold he had, and with his own shaky breath, he swallowed the first mouthful of your blood.Â
The hand at his ribs clenched, pulling him impossibly closer and twisting his shirt into your grip again as your pulse began to speed up. The increase of your heart rate only seemed to encourage the vampire, teeth sinking ever deeper to draw more blood flow. Clenching your jaw, you forced your muscles not to tense, it would only make it hurt more. This mouthful was quicker, Astarion seemed to be actively drawing it out of you instead of just waiting for it. He swallowed again, gaining the strength to snake his arms around you. It wasnât a strong hold at first, but one arm snaked around your waist while the other cradled the back of your head, those long fingers finding their usual place in the locks of your hair. You couldnât help the short laugh that escaped, relishing the cool touch. Your voice stoked another fire in him, provoking another instinct, your blood provided the strength for his grip to harden, becoming more cage like. As if he needed to worry about you trying to escape.Â
He swallowed again, and the numbness spread, not just in your neck but into your cheeks and across your chest. Blood was racing, coursing through you and into him, and with it all the magic of the healing potions. You could feel him getting his legs underneath him, untangling himself from you. At the same time, it was getting harder to hold your arm up, the numbness had reached your fingertips leaving them fumbling at his curls before falling to his shoulder. Another long drink and you found your eyes starting to flutter, everything was starting to feel cold as a shiver shook your body. Astarion, against two centuries of vampiric instinct, started to pull back, and you didnât stop him, but didnât let him go far either. He was mostly supporting himself now, which was a relief because a fair bit of focus was freshly delegated to preventing yourself from swaying.Â
"Take all you need, âStari-" You meant for your voice to be assuring and strong, but it came out breathy and slightly slurred. Astarion pulled away, the movement bringing you mostly out of your stupor. His ruby eyes were as sharp as ever once again, even if the shadows under his eyes were still too dark for your liking, and they stared into your own half lidded eyes. Other than the deep purple shadows, the ashen complex had started to even out, the sweat on his brow had faded away, and when you dropped your gaze, you noticed the twisting black veins were starting to recede and fade. Hells, you could get up and dance (very briefly before you passed out).
Even, with a foot in the grave, more dead than usual, and covered in both of your bloods he was unfairly beautiful. His eyes narrowed on your dopey smile, as if he your relief was a symptom of too much blood loss. If that was the effect of four swallows, just a little more would flush out the poison completely, "I can take it, love, just please let me help you."Â
Astarion never considered himself to be someone that had to be coaxed into receiving a gift, and you were offering him one so sweetly, practically begging him. After 200 years of rats and spiders, you had put literal magic in your veins for him. Magic that was bringing him back from death to his usual state of undead. He could feel it bringing his strength back, allowing all the magic the cleric and druid had poured into him to finally take some affect. Your blood, his first thinking blood, was always delicious- sweet and metallic, a delicate blend of all the good tastes, something so intrinsically you. With the potions infused, though, if Astarion was to hazard guess what sunlight tasted like- this would be it. How could he refuse?Â
Before he went back in, he placed a reverent kiss to the marks he had left in your neck, gingerly lapping at the wounds before sinking his fangs back into your tender flesh. This time, it wasnât a gasp or sob, but a mewl, your frigid fingers once again digging into the flounced collar his shirt. If you both lived until morning, you were sure heâd gripe for hours about all the wrinkles youâd put in his favorite (only) shirt. Probably throw a proper fit about the stake hole.
Now, as the potions effects dwindled in your own body, you could properly feel the drain. The coldness crept up from your extremities but didnât counteract the burn in your muscles, making it harder and harder to suppress the shivers. Your breathing was quick almost a pant, but you still felt like you weren't getting any oxygen. If you were thinking rationally, if you hadnât gone through the brief grief of thinking youâd lost him, you would have realized you need to push him away, that you were approaching your limit. But you werenât thinking rationally, no. You still were too busy grinning- as your hand had fallen from his collar, it grazed across the wound, now fully closed. Just a little more, you promised yourself. You felt him swallow more, he held himself up completely on his own allowing you to lean into him.Â
Astarion was okay, more than just on the mend, he was alive and strong, the potions and magic were working, were the thoughts that were reverberating through your head as things started to feel farther away. Your desperation had melted away, leaving a grateful smile in its wake. It wasnât completely on purpose, but you let Astarion take on more and more of your weight, barely aware of his fangs in your neck anymore, not quite hearing Scratch and the cub whining outside, the shivering even began to subside as it seemed to take too much energy.Â
Earlier, you had drug him to you and held him against your chest almost crying. But, as more of your blood flowed through him, it had become juxtaposed. Astarion held you in place, leaning over you for the best angle at your neck. It was his arms that kept you from falling over, his firm hand that kept your head from lolling too far back. His bite became less fervent, his grip less cage like and more affectionate. His survival instincts started to give way to civility and charm. You barely noticed as he twisted himself so he could slowly, gently lay you down onto the bedroll that had moments ago been his sickbed. He laid you on your back, onto the generous stack of pillows he kept in his tent. He tangled his fingers into yours, just as you had done for him, his knees holding him in a predatory crawl over you, all without breaking from your neck.Â
Barely registering the softness, it was the thud of your other hand against the floor that roused you, just a bit. It was also what drew Astarionâs attention, it took everything in him to withdraw his fangs. He gave each puncture would a diligent cleaning with his tongue before pulling away completely, lest he lose control and dive right back in. (Really, how could one person be that tempting?)
But, you had arguably saved his life, itâd be terribly impolite of him to kill you. When Astarionâs eyes met yours, your gaze was more than half lidded as you watched him- what little of your eyes he could see were glossy and fighting to stay focused, he could hear your heartbeat markedly fainter than he was comfortable with.Â
You were watching him as intently as you could. In the dim lantern light of his tent, surrounded by potion bottles and bloody rags, Astarion was up and moving and breathing again. Revived and strong, his eyes practically glowing scarlet, and, if you really focussed, you could make out the tips of his ears becoming pink. Something that only happened when he was freshly well fed, nothing was left of his stab wound but the hole in his shirt, the frayed edges dyed from the poison and his blood. He could have looked like a angel, complete with the fireâs reflection creating a halo effect on his snowy curls, had it not been for the sheen of sticky blood drenching his chin and neck. Your blood- the blood that gave him enough strength to heal. How could you not smile?Â
Astarion tried to come up with a snarky comment, but for once, nothing came to mind. Instead, he kept glancing between your intertwined fingers, glassy eyes, and that idiotic little smile. Your giddiness was beginning to unnerve him, had you been charmed or perhaps taken a hit to the head? With the parasite, he reached out briefly into your mind. His brow twitched when he was only met with waves of relief and gratitude, you were too tired for structured thought, but too relieved to give into the exhaustion. How could someone on the verge on exsanguination look so happy? And why in the nine hells did it seem to be directed towards his well being?Â
The vampire was stricken, taking count of everything youâd truly done that night alone: fought beside him, tried to take the death blow in his place, comforted him, held his hand, cleaned him up, hadnât let the others undress him anymore than necessary, stayed with him, circumvented his vampirism to find a way to heal him, and had genuinely tried to bleed yourself dry for him. Hell, youâd cut your own neck for him- not even metaphorically, but literally cut your throat for him. He could feel your warmth, your kindness and everything good about you settling into his very marrow. Something uncomfortablyâŚÂ gooey⌠stirred in his chest, something more and more worrying common as of late, when it came to you. Had his manipulation really worked so well? A feeling too close to sharp guilt gnawed at that warm gooey feeling. Was it really manipulation anymore? Gods, your morality was infecting him. Â
âThis is that Insufferabe admirability I was talking about ." He muttered into the tent, shaking his head as he watched your chest rise and fall, using his free hand tame some of the hair at your crown. It was then Astarion realized your eyes had slipped shut, your fingers, now just as cold as his, going limp against his. Weeks ago, he would have polished off the last of your blood and left you behind. But at present, he felt the sickening need to return even half the care youâd shown him. Heâd have to dissect his emotions later. The rogue was glad the other companions had left supplies within arms reach, as it meant he could gather them without dropping your hand.Â
"Ah, ah, ah," He called quietly, gently pulling you back to the real world, pleased to watch your scrunch your nose in the exertion of waking back up. Finally, that contented little smile on your face slipped into a frown, a protest against his interruption of your sleep. Astarionâs smile was almost apologetic as he helped you into a slightly more upright position, "Not quite yet, little love. Itâs your turn. No sharing this time."
Another healing potion was pressed into your hand and opened for you, and you allowed Astarion to guide it to your lips, his pale hand guiding your own. This time, the warmth of the elixir was welcome, a comfort instead of a taunt, assurance instead of a plea. Astarion carefully watched you as you swallowed the potion down, noting how you shivered less and a bit of color returned to your face. When the potion bottle was empty, he traded it for a small cup of water, keeping a guiding hand on the silver chalice heâd nicked from a tradesmen weeks ago until you had enough strength to hold it.Â
Though still exhausted and dizzy, you had the energy to throw him an obstinate look. Astarion feigned a dramatic sigh but kept a firm enough grip on you that you couldnât lay back down, "All this for me, yet you wonât even let me give you water?"
Ignoring how it made the dizziness worse, you rolled your eyes, taking a few sips of the water at a time even if it was mostly just so heâd let you lay back down. Astarion was in one piece and you were exhausted, you couldnât bring yourself to think about anything else. But, Astarion seemed very pleased with himself, squeezing your hand once again, "Good girl."Â
If you werenât on the verge of blood loss, you could have choked on the water. Still, there was a part of you that whispered in relief he must be better if heâs back to teasing you. Astarion watched you take a few more sips before you sagged back against the pillows. Your eyes closed again, but your breathing was deeper now and the hand he held didnât feel as cold. Outside, Scratch and the cub seemed appeased at your improvement as they stopped their pacing and whining to settle at the tent flap.
This time, he didnât pull you back up, instead muttering to himself as he gently tilted your head to the side, exposing his bite marks. No wonder you seemed so tired, they were much messier than usual. Vicious, was the better word. Not only had his two fangs pierced your delicate skin, but his bottom canine teeth had punctured through as well, and he could see the outline of his other teeth in the deep bruising grooves they had left behind. In unfortunate addition, it seemed in the height of his blood lust heâd made more than one bite, leaving your neck littered in marks. Astarion grimaced, it really was more of a mauling, âApologies, darling, Iâm not typically so brutish. Forgive me?"Â
Astarion pointedly ignored how his heart lifted at the slightest nod you gave him, instead focussing on cleaning you up as gently as possible. The potion had stopped the bleeding, and he watched as the wounds themselves were slowly closing. Each swipe of the rag was feather light, almost not even there. The elf noticed you give back into sleep, this time not bothering to wake you again. Instead he kept working and fussing until the only sign of his feeding was the stained neckline of your shirt. Then, he gently ran a clean, wet rag over your face and hands, taking away the evidence of your tears and worry. Finally, he threw a cloak over you like a blanket, to hopefully ward off the last of the shivers from the warmth heâd stolen from you.Â
Not stolen, he reminded himself, though the truth somehow felt more dangerous, it was freely given to him. The vampire settled in, laying across from you, the only part of you he could touch was the hand still holding his. Though, already in your sleep you had shifted towards him. Astarion frowned, eyebrows furrowed, the more he came to know you, the more he knew that you would give and give and give. Truly, he knew that he didnât need to manipulate you anymore, maybe he never needed to, and for the first time in centuries, he didnât want to just keep taking. He didnât want to bleed you dry and loot you for all you were worth. Astarion was surprised to find he wanted give something back to you. He just needed to figure out what.
The nights events caught up to him once again as his eyes closed, listening to the evermore familiar sound of your heartbeat as it became steadier and the even sounds of your breathing as you slept, letting it guide him towards meditation.Â
Gods damn you and your insufferable admirability.
___
Part Two Here!
Again this was my first time writing for Astarion. I also tried to balance things into being equal parts in each persons perspective. I just love when two lovestruck idiots have to confront their own feelings about being in love.
#me when I can use both literal and metaphorical vampirism as an allegory of being consumed by love.#astarion x reader#astarion x you#Astarion x reader#astarion x mc#astarion fanfic#bg3 x reader#bg3 x tav#bg3 fanfic#Astarion self insert
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Opposite (x Zayne)
Warnings: face dysmorphia, envy, jealousy, insecurity
Tags: Angst (no comfort), f!reader (pro trans blog), MC Reader
Synopsis: You see Zayne with another girl, and let your insecurities get the better of you.
You thought itâd be a wonderful day. There was definitely something going on between the two of you, something unspoken, and on the last trip, Zayne kissed you. You two did not address it or follow through where you left off, but there were sparks and a certain tension, always on the brink of exploding into something more.
That day, you were going to ask him about it, but at the bakery where youâd usually find him on sunny afternoons having a snack, someone else was next to him. An intern, by the looks of it. The most beautiful girl youâd ever seen. Tall, perfect skin, large eyes, sweeter voice, prettier. Pretty and smart in ways youâd never be.
Prettier, smarter.
And he was smiling. Zayne, usually stoic, was laughing at a joke sheâd made. Prettier, smarter, and funny. You never felt your heart beat faster, the lump in your throat growing, and you realised the only way out for you was literally, out of the bakery. You quietly went back, breathing slowly to control your emotions. Right, why would Zayne be with you? He had better options.
You almost laughed when you finally reached your apartment. Stupid, stupid girl. You cursed yourself internally. Before you could think about anything else, you heard your phone buzz. Looking at it, it was a text from Zayne. You stupidly saved his number with emojis on your phone.
âDonât forget your check-up appointment tomorrow.â
Of course, thatâs all he was to you. A doctor. You replied to him with a thumbs-up emoji, immediately changing his contact name to Dr. Zayne, and removing your display picture. You felt awful, insignificant, ugly. You did not want to look in the mirror. You were embarrassed.
Why did he kiss you in the first place? Were you overthinking? Was that girl why he never brought up the time he kissed you?
You sighed, calming yourself down. This kind of pain wasnât good for the heart. You changed into your pajamas, trying to distract yourself with a movie, some popcorn, and eventually, a drink. Then two. Then three. Then as many as it took to fall asleep.
You woke up groggy, irritated, and still remembering that girlâs face, that doctor you had a crush on, and the fact youâd see them in the hospital in a few hours. You took a shower, put on some makeup, removed the makeup considering you were just going to get a checkup, looked up if itâs acceptable to wear makeup to a hospital on the internet, and then settled with a lip tint and concealer.
Maybe you shouldâve called Tara to come along with you for moral support, and you could go out for drinks later, but you decided against it considering Grayson and Yvonne would be there to cheer you up.
It hurt when you saw them at the hospital chatting with that intern. It was about Zayne, something related to a surgery going well. You bowed your head, praying they wouldnât notice you, as you almost tip-toed to Zayneâs office.
â[Name]!â Yvonne called, waving. You took a deep breath and forced a smile back, approaching the three. Upon getting a closer look of the intern, you realised she had no blemishes, no scars, and her hands were perfectly manicured. She looked like one of those models that you convinced yourself had airbrushed editing on magazine pages. Guess people like that really did exist.
âUh, something on my face?â She asked, and you realised you were staring.
You looked away, embarrassed. âNothing, sorry.â
âThis is Jo, Zayneâs new intern.â Grayson spoke, and you bit your lip as you nodded at her. âHe usually doesnât take any, but he selected her himself seeing how brilliant her research was.â
You just smiled and nodded, stupidly, to the point you were sure it was becoming weird.
âUh, youâre here for the checkup, right? Let me take you to him.â She looked at her notepad, and gestured you to Zayneâs office. You didnât wave a bye to your friends, just keeping your head down. Usually, youâd hop to Zayneâs room like it was your own, opening the door with a smile, but this time the door was opened for you, and you couldnât meet his eyes.
It felt like the universe was mocking you, and this was something youâd have to bear.
âDr. Zayne.â She was the one greeting him this time.
You walked over to Zayne, sitting on the examination chair next to him. You didnât meet his eyes, fiddling with the metal surface of your chair instead. Zayne wouldâve immediately noticed. Maybe he did.
âJo, you can leave.â
You watched her confused expression from the corner of your eye, and then her perfect figure take a bow and leave.
âEyes on me.â
You couldnât. You couldnât raise your eyes to look at him, even though it was probably for the checkup. Zayne put two fingers under your chin, and forced you to look up, a small torch in his other hand.
âYouâre mad at me.â He said, checking your eyes, his hand caressing your cheek. You didnât respond, turning around as usual for his stethoscope to measure your heart rate. Zayne sighed, placing his stethoscope on your spine as you took a deep, shaky breath.
âCan you tell me what I did?â He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you on to his lap, breathing in your scent. You wanted to hold him back, nuzzle him, something, but the insecurity, a demon inside of you, wouldnât let you.
âIf you do this again, Iâm switching doctors.â You pulled yourself away from him, irritated, standing up. Zayne also looked annoyed, and hurt. Were you the one being petty here? You didnât think about it.
âCheck-upâs done, Iâm leaving.â
âItâs actually not.â Zayne spoke firmly, definitely annoyed. You sat back down next to him, looking at him with defiant eyes.
He looked down at his notepad. âAre you experiencing any odd symptoms?â
Heartbreak, jealousy, agonising mental pain. âNo.â
âHave you been eating well?â
You frowned. You hadnât eaten since yesterday, and you didnât realise it until now, but you lied. âYeah.â
âThen why did I hear your stomach growl?â
Your cheeks reddened. Zayne was a doctor after all, nothing got past him. He gave you a candy from his coat pocket. âLetâs get lunch after my shift is over.â
You quietly nibbled on the candy, handing the wrapper back to him, which made him smile. âMy princess.â
âIf Iâm your princess, why did I see you at that bakery with some other girl yesterday?â You looked down, embarrassed now, realising you were mad over such a small thing.
Zayne held your face gently, making you look up at him. âThatâs what this is about? Jo?â
You pulled away from him. âNot just her, but also, you kissed me, and never addressed it again. I feel like Iâm a candy wrapper to you, someone to discard after use.â
âThatâs-â Zayneâs voice was hesitant. You didnât meet his eyes and he didnât make you. âI⌠Iâm sorry, I was busy after that. I didnât have the time to call you over, or-â
âBut you had the time to go to a bakery with your intern?â
Zayneâs expression turned cross. You supposed he was done with you too. âShe called me there, because she saw I was overworking myself. Am I not allowed that much?â
You bit your lip. Prettier, smarter, funny, and kinder. âIâm sorry.â You managed. That was all you had to say. You let your insecurities get the better of you, but⌠was that hard to understand for Zayne? Tears fell from your eyes but you didnât feel like you were going to cry. âI, um⌠I should go.â
âNo, please-â Zayne tried, reaching his hand out for you but you stood up. You didnât want to look at him, at anyone at the hospital. You did not want to go home, you did not want to be anywhere, you did not want to exist as a person in the universe. An insecure, ugly person, who hurt the people around them. It hurt like knives that started inside your heart and prodded their way outwards, hurting you most of all, it-
âIâll take the day off.â You did not realise when Zayne reached next to you by the door, his large hand holding it close. âIâll make time for you. Please, let me fix this.â
âItâs not your fault, Zayne.â You put your hand on the door handle, red eyes meeting his exasperated ones, as you spoke what needed to be said. âI just think we arenât right for each other.â
You could see the emotion fall from his face, his hand leaving the door. You walked out, grateful that at least Yvonne and Grayson werenât eavesdropping right outside this time. Jo wasnât too far away, though, and she noticed your teary face. âIs everything okay?â She asked, concerned. That hurt worse than if she wouldâve just ignored it, because this girl in front of you was blameless. You smiled at her, lying that it was just allergies, hoping sheâd take good care of Zayne in your place.
âxâ
Part 2 fixing things, anyone?
#zayne x reader#zayne x mc#zayne love and deepspace#LADS zayne#lnds#l&ds#zayne headcanons#zayne fics#fanfiction#self insert#zayne angst#no comfort
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youre right ,,,what IF the captain was evil
#in space with markiplier#iswm#iswm captain#head engineer mark#markiplier#artists on tumblr#ibispaintx#CAPTAIN I LOVE YAAAAOOUUUUU đđ#mcs/self inserts who arent js some pushover you have my heart#oc#original character
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Come along, my flesh pile
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Before Mr Silvairâs (Surgeonâs) route, I always had a theory that the residents regenerated like viscera-laden starfish
So seeing the doctor himself come up to me in all his gooey mid-regen glory was both terrifying and hilarious
Also I kinda just rattled off the dialogue from memory so sorry if itâs not exact akdnd
#homicipher spoilers#mr silvair#homicipher#homicipher fanart#self insert#homicipher x mc#monster#art post
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For our souls
#do not download#do not repost#my art#digital art#my artstyle#art#fanart#quaestor valdemar#drawing#the arcana game#the arcana valdemar#artists on tumblr#Valdemar fanart#sketch#the arcana mc#the arcana fanart#the arcana courtiers#valdemar#quaestor valdemar x reader#quaestor valdemar x mc#quaestor valdemar x you#therapy â drawing self-insert art âď¸#let's enjoy our three day nap bois#soft#fluff#very self indulgent#I needed that#yes it's you and I in their arms we all deserve a little treat#soft valdemar has me in their claws#valdemart
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I wanna write Kate x Reader fanfic because sheâs literally the prettiest MC Iâve ever laid eyes on and I will fight William to the death for her love-
JUST LOOK AT HER!!!
MY GAY ASS CANâT NOT SIMP FOR SUCH A BEAUTY/CUTIE PATOOTIE!!!
*gay screeching*
#fr the only mc id marry-#probably gonna make a self-insert oc just so i feel justified to write fanfiction#also i get annoyed writing second person fics sometimes but hate using (Y/N) or another variation of that for third person#ikemen villains#ikevil#ikevil kate
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I finally made my MC sheet for my Spring MC "Salem"!
Note: The last name is definitely because Andromeda was Perseus' wife and I am a Percy simp...
#she is just a projection of me lowkey#keyframes#keyframes vn#keyframes mc#keyframes art#keyframes fanart#percy tozaki#perseus tozaki#alemonyoyo art#art#fanart#drawing#illustration#artist on tumblr#artist#artists on tumblr#selfship#yume ship#self insert
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