#maybe worse I found out years later that the other student was aware of the set up and I never was
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border-collie · 1 year ago
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I can’t sleep so my brain is going on about how my senior year of HS my program headmaster, who was essentially a principal, paired me up with another student because I didn’t have any friends and the only class we didn’t have together was band. It worked but also why not just suggest an autism evaluation, it would have been easier than rigging our schedules.
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roseblancheenfleurs · 8 months ago
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Untold story of magic ✨ 2
Warning ⚠️⚠️⚠️
Nsfw Content, Slight Degradation, later aged characters, fanfiction, toxic, rivals to lovers to enemies to spouses 😌,Muggle insult, cursing by underage etc.
Continuation .....
You hurried to the Godric 's Hollow , Potter's house.
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It wasn't like this when you came here before on the birth of your grand nephew. The predicted chosen one, Harry Potter.
You ran into the house..., "James...Lily" you called for them only to find Minerva arguing with Dumbledore .
"... you handed over Harry to them" that's what you heard after entering .
Before they looked towards you.
"Harry? Where's Harry?"
You asked fearing the worse...
"He is in safe hands , don't worry Ms. Y/s (your surname)."Dumbledore assures as Minerva cuts him off.
She says more like acussing him of a grave crime, "You literally handed them over to those people who would hesitate to provide him the bare minimum "...
"THE DURSLEYS!" You screamed...
"Am I still not alive or am not enough strong to protect him?" You considered them the second dangerous people next to him.
"You still have that confidence in yourself Ms. Y/s.... Good good" it may seem to anyone that Dumbledore is encouraging you but the sarcasm can be seen dropping from that mocking gaze.
"Are you even aware that how easily Harry could be hunted down if he stays with you? plus he is with his closest relatives and I see absolute no difference between you and durselys especially the blood. And after that it's more dangerous to stay with you" He says while giving you a side gaze from the upper side of his glasses.
"hah!" You smirk and proceed to say those things over his face, "Obviously what can be expected from a fucking manipulating man because whom all these happened if only you didn't use that rotten head of yours "
"Truth is always bitter, my dear student, try hard maybe one day you could digest that, Just a few words of mine triggered you so easily, who knows if you hand over Harry to him yourself just by some false sugar coated words " he shows himself out of the murder scene . You could feel millions of needles piercing the heart. Standing there speechless cause of the amount of trust your most inspiring teacher had on you.
A tear escaped your eye remembering that day you still couldn't believe .
Like it was a day or two ago you gaining all fame and name, an interesting fact blowed your mind that being a muggle born magician meant you had a wizard/witch ancestry , that was the time you meet Him, the most renowned yet retired cosmetic potioneer known for the invention of Sleekeazy's Hair potion in 1926.None other than Mr . Fleamont Potter and His wife Euphemia Potter with their 11 year old son, James Potter.
A conversation soared,
Both of you were on the peak of your careers Fleamont and you have meet many times before for business purposes but today it was a informal meeting without any purpose.
Sitting inside a five star restaurant having dinner talking about many daily life things one of them was the family tree, many didn't know that you are a muggle born and assumed you were a pure blood.
"If Salvius Gryffindor didn't marry a muggle we could have been relatives through your maternal side, Ms. Y/s" Fleamont laughed.
Salvius Gryffindor brother of Godric Gryffindor not much mentioned in the wizarding scriptures shared the name as your Maternal ancestor who you found to be the only wizard in your bloodline Salvius YM/s(your mother's surname).
That was something you sort of calculated and suddenly felt a little tug on your lower sleeve. It was little James with pink blush spreading on his cheeks.
"What happened little one? " You asked him softly.
Seeing him shuttering infront of you Euphemia says, "James is a great fan of your books, He has been asking to meet for many days to get a sign of yours".
You see him helding out one of your first published books with his little hands, you never gave autographs but the scene of you felt too cute to be ignored.
You bring out your personal quill and gave a sign on the front cover.
"Happy now, little one" Those pupils could be literally seen to be shining. He rushed and hugged you.
With those sparkly eyes puppy eyes looking at your face he says with a wide smile, " Thank You". And you hugged him back with little kiss on the forehead that little face of his was completely red now. With three of you laughing at the shy kid.
The rest went well but a problem arised at the parting.
It was James clinging to your skirt set on his words to go with him.
"My parents are waiting for me ,They would worry if I don't go back" You try to free yourself from his grip trying not to hurt him.
"They will also stay with us we live in a big house, everyone will live together" He tightened the grip.
Both of his parents tried to make him understand to let you go. But who listens.
You see literally no way to make him understand. You knelt to his level and say, "You will be going to Hogwarts right?"
"Yes" He answers...
"I teach there... When you get there you can meet me whenever needed" You assure him with a sweet smile .
"Really" He says.
You nod in a positive way.
And that's the start. At Hogwarts, Every student, every teacher were scared of the pranks of the Marauders but they used to be the most well behaved infront of you. Enjoying afternoon tea, collecting herbs in the forbidden forest taking care of beasts, reading in library. It was a daily routine during the break time there would be a knock on your door only to find Minerva dragging James by his collar
"How did my dear friend thought to visit me?" You ask Minerva who was still panting .
"Take your student, Or one day I may beat the shit out of him" She says pointing towards the empty coat "Wait wasn't he just here"
James who sneaked away from her standing beside you holding your sleeve giggles.
"Why do you always behind him, Minerva?"
"Ask that trouble maker" She huffs sitting at the table pouring herself a cup of tea and drinking it.
"What did you do James?" You ask.
"The other day you said Cats are lactose intolerant" James says
"Yes I did"
"So I change Mimi's cow milk for tea with flour mixed with water"
"Hahaha" You laughed hearing it,
"You are laughing it off" Minerva gives you a glare.
"It was out of concern Minerva, Cats should not be given cow milk" You somehow convey your words through your laugh "James is just concerned about Mimi, right James?"
He nods. You never really scolded James about anything you always thought if Tom and You had a son, he would have been the age of James.
After parting with Tom you were never able to love someone else. Leading to be single even now. James seemed to be fulfilled all the absence of your dream family.
You slowly forgot the loneliness due to him.
During vactional breaks there were times you would take James to roam in the Diagon Alley trying new food and drinks, sometimes showing him your new inventions.
Like any other day you were walking down the street holding James in your hand both of your identity Hidden with cloaks you collided with another hooded figure.
Losing your balance you fell on the figure revealing a mature face with the same curly bangs , dark eyes familiar to you .
Tom Marvolo Riddle!?
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punkwixes · 1 year ago
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i guess a better life update is like
so i’m graduating this spring. it took me a while to get an internship + i got rejected from the first one i applied to. that was okay, though, because it was smth specific that only took One student in each department, so like 4 students total, and you had to specially apply to it. i found another internship actually working for the school itself, which i’m pleased with. it’s very close to my home, and i can get there easily. they’re very casual about dress code too, so i dyed my hair again earlier this month :3
i quit working for the nursing home like 6 months ago, after almost 6 YEARS of being employed there. it was pretty on the spot lmao. we got new management that sucked + a resident started screaming at me and i was just like. well. i’m done.
currently: unemployed! or “full-time student” according to, like, my taxes or w/e. contemplating applying to some stores in the area but not too worried about it. money isssss pretty tight rn, but luckily i was able to save a LOT over the pandemic so i’ll be okay until i graduate and have to start paying back those student loans. i would like to think i’m pretty good at budgeting and money management, luckily.
ummm wedding is happening in may of next year, hopefully. move is happening ????? idk whenever it works for both of us. it’s gonna be scary but i can’t complain or worry about it too much because my wife already did that move Alone, so , like,
made this post because i was just thinking about like, idk what the gap will be between graduating & moving — not really worried about it Too much, because i know that’s smth we will figure out later haha. but i was thinking about how it’s smth we will figure out because i am Acutely aware of what happened when shit got bad in june 2017, where i was going “i’ll be moving out soon, i can’t get a job NOW!” and then i didn’t move out till december 2017. but then i was thinking about how i haven’t really talked about my life Extensively here since all that happened — maybe a bit, but most of it happens in dms (hi jess) (the ONLY person i use the tumblr messenger for) or in my discord server(s?) lmao.
and i realized that i have a lot of people (relatively, i guess.) who have been following me since i was like. 15? 16? and who maybe saw all that go down but don’t know what’s happening now.
anyways. on that front. my parents and i have… idk. kind of a relationship? not really sure. they have more of a relationship to me than i have to them, which is funny. they text me about every other day, but i don’t really answer that often. they know if they make negative commentary abt anything i’m doing they’ll just lose contact with me for good. they know i’m gay & that i’m getting married, and they’re Forced to be supportive Or Else, which i also find funny. they’re not attending my wedding though, On God.
had a weird thing happen a while back where my mom apologized for like. a lot of stuff. for the homophobia, for Some of the physical abuse she did, for some of the physical abuse & other abuse my dad & brother did to me. on their behalf, i guess? idk, being apologized to doesn’t really mean anything to me — or it didn’t, for a long time; i’ve only recently had Moments where someone apologized to me and i felt that it meant a lot — so i just felt weird about it. she was crying really hard, so i know that she knows that it was Bad. i still wish i could impart on her or on other people who don’t believe me Exactly what it was like, but i can’t.
for a large part it doesn’t really affect me, other than like, a desire to bury my head in the sand rather than Confront anything negative. so like. it doesn’t make it better but what i’m trying to say is like… idk, i’m doing fine, it could be way worse.
i guess i’m just biding my time until graduation. i almost wish i was working, because it feels like time passed a lot faster when i had work looming over me every two days. my class schedule for the next week is… fun…. i have a class from 2-4 and 6-8 on mondays, and then class from 6-8 on wednesdays. my fourth class is just my internship credit, and i don’t really need any more classes [that are offered in the fall].
so i’ll have plenty of free time, which is nice. i want to do more around the house, helping w upkeep and stuff. i have housemates & friends who i Love, which is not smth i would have expected like five years ago. so. time flies, i guess.
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watevermelon · 4 years ago
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Touch-Averse | Kiyoomi Sakusa x Reader
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✧ Summary: Physical affection was something you loved, and while Sakusa was not exactly the biggest fan, you didn’t want to encroach on him. You weren’t expecting your boyfriend to get jealous!
➳ A/N: Hey! This has been waiting around for so long; I think I steered a little too into the angst with this one asfdgfhj ;-; ➳ Tags: Angst with a happy ending, komori is a lil shit; ➳  Masterlist 
—xXxXxXxXxXx—
By all intents and purposes, Sakusa was the perfect boyfriend.
You were friends before through Komori since junior high and one thing led to another before the wing-spiker finally asked you out. You knew long before as his friend that he was averse to physical contact — even if it was under two layers of gloves.
No, the germaphobe kept everyone at a distance further from arms length. He wanted to keep things neat and orderly and straying from that made him uncomfortable.
And it warmed your heart that, despite this life-long struggle, Sakusa still let you into his world in little ways.
He would hold your hand through the halls of school (of course, you had to thoroughly wash your hands first and then get his personal approval). And, on lucky days like when Itachiyama won their practice matches that week, Sakusa would kiss you on the forehead openly in public.
All you had to do was vocalize things, keep the roads of communication between you two and he would respond. If you wanted to come over to his family home or vice versa — just let him know ahead of time and he would be happy to accommodate you. You want to go on a date to the arcade? Sure, send him a text and he’ll pencil you in for a couple days from now. A part of you also liked wearing his sweaters, the ones that plastered his last-name across the back. And on request, Sakusa let you wear his own to school.
Sakusa was generally aware of your needs and was not against being vocal about your relationship. You knew all about this prior to being his official girlfriend and had even found it endearing how much he cared about your personal health.
All it took was a look. 
A single look was enough to plant the seed of doubt and make it take root. 
It was after volleyball practice — you had stayed behind after your student council duties and went over to the courts instead of heading straight back to the dorms. You hadn’t told Sakusa before that you would be visiting, just popping in so you can walk back together.
You waved at the others, Komori noticing you first from the sidelines and greeting you. Some others from the team took notice beside him and recognized you from being friends with the second-years.
Between the break, you approached Sakusa’s pack where you knew he would go, happy to greet him.
He shot you the most disgusted look you had ever seen.
After, Sakusa had greeted you in his usual monotone voice. Voice clipped and simply drinking his water, Sakusa was there for a quick minute before returning back to the match without so much as a goodbye.
Your walk back to the dorms was eerily silent.
It could have been nothing, just a look that he always had in his resting judgmental grandma face. But for some reason it stuck to you, how mean his tone was towards his girlfriend of all people and how quick he was to get away from you after.
You tried to wave it off, give him the benefit of the doubt as you lay awake in your dorm room. Not saying anything to your roommate, you internalized most of your feelings and let it continue to fester below the surface.
He already didn’t like physical touch with you. But you had just greeted him, hardly pushing into his comfortable space. But even so, it was clear Sakusa had still been disgusted with you.
Was this what he really thought about you?
You tried your best to wave it off — maybe he wasn’t feeling too well that day? Maybe the match was annoying him? Maybe something just happened with his other teammates?
And so the next day after you were done with your extracurriculars, you dropped by the gym again just to see how Sakusa was doing.
Sakusa was quick to find in the crowd of boys, his tall height and curly black hair bobbing along as he readied to jump in the air. Seeing him spike, hearing the smack of power as it slammed into the floor, it always made you so proud at how fair he had come.
That moment didn’t last long.
No, it was pushed out by another emotion entirely.
The coach called the players on the opposite side, ringing them in to give some tips to them specifically. Sakusa’s side backed off to grab drinks of their water, the main manager running up to him with a towel in hand.
And Sakusa let her wipe at his face.
A small dab at his forehead and at the sides of his face and the moment was over. But that was not what you saw. You saw your boyfriend, your long-term friend, allow someone in his close space to touch his face of all things! You still had to wear gloves sometimes. And here she was, noses only inches away from one another, as she was allowed into his world.
What was it that made you so undesirable?
Was Sakusa annoyed with you? Had you been asking too much of him? You knew he was averse to the things you liked, but you never thought that it would push Sakusa away to this point.
You loved Sakusa and you had tried really hard to accommodate what he was looking for in a relationship. But was that really fair? Was he being fair to you at this point? Did he even view you as anything special, as his girlfriend?
Walking out the gym without a single word, you turned around with all intents to go back to your room and reevaluate your decisions. You failed to notice Komori’s wandering eyes that followed you out the open doors.
Your roommate commented that you looked terrible that night and was a willing open ear for you. You were grateful beyond compare, she was an awesome friend that you shared classes with and was alsoa member in the student council.
But instead of venting, you just relished in the tight hug she gave you. This physical touch was what you crazed and, while it had never really affected you before, it made you sad that this was something Sakusa would never want.
Was it really fair to have to schedule a hug with him? 
Did he even want you as his girlfriend?
You internalized this hard and the it was hard to even look at Sakusa the next day at school, these thoughts only propping up again and again. What hurt even more is that you were actively avoiding the wing-spiker and it seemed that he did not even notice. Just went about his day, avoiding most people and sticking to corners alone.
But you were his girlfriend. He avoided most people but should that really include you?
Did he feel like you were suffocating him? You loved him and didn’t want to lose him. And so if he wanted space, you were willing to give it to him. But for Sakusa to treat you so cruelly when you were trying so hard - was it even fair at this point?
A text-tone from your phone permeated the room and you felt your spirits almost physically lift themselves up at the prospect of Sakusa reaching out to you.
But his text only made your heart drop.
Give me back my sweater already. Sakusa’s words read, Don’t you have your own?
And suddenly your thoughts of doubt were solidified as fact in your mind.
Grabbing the sweater from your bedside, you almost cried as you folded it up. Sakusa’s terms of endearment were few and far between, you wearing his sweater was one of the few things you could compromise on. And now he did not even want that.
You went about your morning weakly, going into Sakusa’s homeroom and leaving the sweater in a bag there. Alongside it was only a small note that you did not have time to wash it while it was in the bag. You did not wait a moment longer, dropping off the package and hoping to avoid him the rest of the day.
And throughout the school hours, you were doing a good job. During lunch you were able to avoid spending time with both Sakusa and Komori, leaving your classroom the moment the teacher dismissed you and retreating to the outside area behind school. Would it do you any good to confront Sakusa over something that he probably did not even care about? Was he planning on breaking up with you?
These thoughts only continued to plague you throughout the day and the more you continued to ponder on it - the worse it got. Maybe he always viewed you this way, just humoring your relationship for the sake of your friendship.
Your mindset spiraled downward worse and worse and you had little initiative to even go to club activities after school. Your roommate had vouched for you at the student council meeting while you went back to the dorms depressed and very not well dressed.
The moment your phone dinged to life you shot up in repressed excitement, wondering if Sakusa had noticed your mood and reached out.
It was Komori.
Hey, missed ya during lunch. Wanna catch dinner together?
Of course, it was Komori.
You wondered for a hot second if it would be smart to go with the libero out to dinners the campus cafeteria. Odds are you were going to pour your feelings out to the boy and he was undoubtedly loyal to Sakusa. Komori was always one of your closest friends, even before dating the wing-spiker.
Another ding ringed out a second later.
Come on, you’re my friend too.
It was almost like he was reading your mind - the poor boy was probably so used to your evasiveness from before that it was no doubt he remembered it.
You typed back, Okay, I’ll meet you after practice.
See you then <3
You texted your roommate that you would be meeting with the libero, so as not to worry when she returned. In the meantime, you hung around your room and completed some of your homework early. Once Komori texted you that he was ready, you put on a large hoodie and some leggings, trying your best to look presentable despite your solemn expression. 
“Hey!” Komori perked up when he saw you, already at a table in the cafeteria. Thankfully he was sitting alone. The moment you were close enough, Komori pulled you into his chest and wrapped his arms around your shoulders.
Komori always gave the best hugs and you squeezed your arms around his middle right back. It had been a while since he, or any male for that matter hugged you like this. Most of the male population at school was well aware of your relationship with Sakusa and all it took was a look from the strong spiker to get most to back off.
But with Komori being his best friend and also one of yours, he was one of the few people who could get away with sharing you in a warm embrace. However, you did notice as of late that he was withholding some of the best hugs from you.
“Thanks for joining me tonight.” Komori continued, leaning back while you were still in his arms. “I know you’ve been kind of down.”
“Yeah.” 
“Listen, you can tell me anything or nothing if you want. Whatever you’re comfortable with - I just wanted to spend this time with you so you know you’re not alone.”
You almost teared up on the spot, with the exception of your roommate, it had been so long since someone had been so considerate with your feelings. Komori was the best bro and just all friend anyone could ask for.
Nuzzling further into his chest, you shakily replied. “You’re the best, Komori.”
Komori guided you to the seats, telling you that he had actually placed a comfort food order and was waiting for the number to be called. You smiled at him in response, placing your hands on the table and mentally preparing for what you wanted to say.
It felt almost therapeutic, admitting to the libero all the feelings that you had bottled up over the past few days. Komori nodded along, listening to you without cutting in or interrupting with his own point of view. He took in every word, keen on gaining your perspective before he added on.
“It makes me wonder, does Sakusa even want to be in this relationship?” You asked aloud, baring your insecurity to him.
Little did you know that Sakusa was reacting exactly opposite to what you were thinking.
Komori had actually invited the wing-spiker to join this dinner, but he had simply walked away in silence back to his own dorm.
Sakusa would never admit this aloud, but he cherished you in so many ways that it frightened him. Your relationship was built on years of knowing each other. And from the beginning of it all, Sakusa knew that he was all in. From high school to the end of your days, he was sure that this was the only relationship he wanted to ever be in. You were the first and only person he ever loved and he wanted to be that for you too.
And with that thought, Sakusa had always been afraid of losing you. He wondered, on multiple occasions, if you would be happier with someone else. After all, yes you were friends for a while, but you were much closer to Komori before you were in a relationship. 
Sakusa saw it all - he knew how you leaned into the libero for tight hugs and how the both of you were still fond of spending time alone together. He had never doubted you or his cousin’s loyalty; neither you nor Komori would ever do anything to hurt him, Sakusa was sure. But he had a much more looming fear, one that frightened him simply because it was probably true, that you would probably be happier with Komori.
The libero was capable of easily reading your mood and reacting to it properly. It was Komori after all that noticed you had left the gymnasium the other day without greeting either male. He was very in-tune to your personality and it seemed the both of you were very agreeable. Sakusa remembered the time that many of your classmates had thought it was you and Komori dating after all.
Sakusa would honestly never forget that.
And so the wing-spiker had thought on multiple occasions if you would be happier in the arms of another. Maybe someone who had more time for you, who liked being as affectionate as you did.
Admittedly, Sakusa knew something was off from the moment you returned the sweater. He knew that you cherished wearing it for some reason. But you had it over a week and it was time for him to wash it. After all, it must have been dirty from overuse at this point and he did not want you possibly getting sick from something he wore.
Besides, he could just lend you another cleaner sweater for you to wear.
This was simply the way he thought - cut and dry and oftentimes misconstrued by other people.
But the last person he ever wanted to hurt was you.
Sucking in a hard breath, Sakusa attempted to figure out what to say. Not that he was unsure what to get across, but that he wanted to get out the proper wording before he caused any true damage to you. He must have been standing in the middle of his dorm room for a good twenty minutes, trying to keep a level head as different phrases evaded him.
Calm and collected, he told himself as he got near the cafeteria.
The last thing he wanted to ever see greeted him - you and Komori standing alongside a cafeteria table, you in his arms as he held you tightly.
It seemed you were still in the middle of your meal, your trays of food still stacked with chopsticks to the side. Regardless of the situation, Sakusa stalked over quietly and made his presence extremely known.
From Komori’s nice hug to suddenly pulled into another, your ten seconds of panic morphed into surprise at seeing your boyfriend.
“Sakusa!” You exclaimed, head against his chest as he continued to stare down his cousin. “This looks bad, but I was just talking to Komori about something.”
Komori only laughed, picking up his tray and taking it with him elsewhere. “See you tomorrow, lovebirds.”
“I--” You stuttered over your words as the libero made his quick escape, “We were in the middle of a meal!”
“We need to talk.”
Wait. 
Was Sakusa breaking up with you right now?
You felt fresh tears break your visage as you asked him outright, “Are you breaking up with me?”
Sakusa recoiled before grabbing your hand, “No. Let’s go.”
You allowed him to drag you wordlessly, following along as he led you back to his dorm. He unceremoniously brought you along with him - was he sparing your feelings by breaking up with you away from the public eye?
The worries must have shown up on your face since, once you entered the elevator, Sakusa took one look at you before pulling you into his embrace again. He lingered for a second, as if unsure where to place himself, then leaned down to put a small mask-covered kiss on your forehead. You stilled at the motion, surprised that he was willing to show any display of affection in public.
The moment was only broken when he pulled you toward his dorm room, closing it loudly behind you.
“Why would you think that I would want to break up with you?” Sakusa asked, not at all sugar-coating his words.
You hesitated, looking at the ground before back at him. “Sakusa, are you even happy being with me?”
His eyes peeking over the mask widened in surprise. In the next second, Sakusa pulled his mask off and threw it in the direction of his trash bin. You took a step back at his aggressiveness, but he only followed the movement and wrapped an arm around your waist.
Sakusa pulled you against him and stated clearly, “I want to be with you forever, if given the chance.”
“Really?”
He did not hesitate in response, “Yes.”
You smiled at how sure he was, but his actions from the last few days still had you on edge. With a hand on his chest, you bit your lip before asking. “You don’t feel like I’m suffocating you?”
Sakusa angled his head in question before shooting back, “Why would you assume that?”
“I just feel like you don’t really want me around?” You admitted, words coming out slowly. “I mean, the other day you just seemed like you didn’t want me at your practice. And then I saw your manager dabbing you with the towel and even I can’t even hug you without warning.”
Sakusa simply stared at you as you spoke, his full attention to your words as he recalled the past few days.
“I like spending time with you, but at practice I was sweaty and you were still in your school uniform. It would be unfair to you if I was the one to sully it.” Sakusa replied, “While I am not close to the manager, handling the towels is one of her responsibilities. And I prefer to get toweled down rather than do it myself then touch the volleyball with sweaty hands.”
“Oh.”
You were at a loss for words once he explained himself.
“What about the other day?” You recalled, “I get that you don’t like me wearing your sweaters, but you should have just told me outright.”
You were not expecting Sakusa to shoot you a tired smile.
He moved to kiss your forehead again, lips lingering above your brow before he spoke. “I like seeing you in my sweaters. It reminds everyone that you’re mine.”
“What?”
“But you had that sweater for more than five days, right?” Sakusa answered with a question, “I have the proper detergent to clean it. It would do you no good if you got dirty or even sick from one of my articles of clothing.”
“Oh.”
You were an idiot. 
An overthinking, doubtful, big dumb idiot.
You felt the small exhale against his chest, tantamount to a small laugh from Sakusa. “Oh?”
“I just--” You tried to articulate yourself, “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for what?”
“I’m sorry I doubted you.” You admitted, “There are just these moments. I know you don’t like physical touch that much, but there are times I want to hug you or kiss you. And I get the feeling that you don’t like it.”
You heard Sakusa exhale above you, before feeling a slight nudging at your chin. Using his free hand, the wing-spiker was guiding your gaze back to him. He had an oddly fond expression on, before he leaned forward to slot your lips against his.
Leaning forward into the kiss, you carded your fingers in his curly mop of hair, arms crossed behind his neck. He pulled you as close as possible, lingering in the moment of your passionate lip-lock before settling you back down on your feet.
“I love kissing you.” Sakusa stated fondly, eyes still glued to yours.
You laughed breathlessly, “I know that now.”
“Good.” Sakusa replied, “I’m not good at these things. I can’t comfort you like others do, but please trust in me. Communicate with me - not your roommate and not Komori.”
“Okay. I’m sorry that I closed myself off.” You apologized, receiving a second kiss back.
You were caught off-guard, like the hesitation Sakusa had before was suddenly lifted from its floodgates. He pecked you one, twice, returning over and over as he lost himself in the feel of your lips against his.
“I have two newly cleaned sweaters for you to choose from.” Sakusa whispered, as if this was his version of sweet nothings. “I would prefer it if you wore one tomorrow.”
You shot him back a radiant smile, one that he eagerly savored in the back of his memory. “I would love to.”
Your relationship did not magically fix in that single night, but you resolved to continue working on your communication. It was a two-way street, one that the both of you had to work on.
But by God, you two loved each other. 
And that was all that mattered.
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stagkingswife · 2 years ago
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I started this yesterday, but needed to walk away from it for a while before I could finish it…
@a-witch-named-crow, this is a big enough topic that I'm pulling it into it's own post, because I can't imaging fitting it all into a reply. I'm also going to put most of it under the cut, because I'm going be very frank about my chronic pain and my relationship with it, and I know that can be a bit much for some people.
I was diagnosed with CRPS when I was a sophomore in high school, this was long enough ago that it had a different name and the only possible treatment options would have involved taking me out of high school to send me to CHOP, or Mayo, or the Cleveland Clinic for intensive physical therapy in the slim hopes that it would normalize the pain. This really crushed me for a little bit. I was one of those kids who sort of was defined by being a good student, I couldn’t imaging my life if I interrupted school in anyway. I had also been told that I should stop dancing, given that it was likely the cause of the pain, and would surely only make it worse. But I had just been cast as Odette in Swan Lake, I was going into Junior year with a heavy class load, I had been promoted to section leader in the marching band, and I was not ready to slow down.
So I decided at 15 that if there were such slim chances of treatment working I wasn't going to put anything on hold for my pain. At the time it wasn’t too bad, I would have flair ups where it was bad, but a normal day was maybe a 2-3 on the scale. I could manage may life with that. I think that was what really set the stage for my relationship with my pain. Once I decided that I wasn't going to slow down I kind of turned it into a motivator. A lot of things came to be about doing things despite my pain. I took great pride in doing everything my able bodied friends were able to do, and sometimes more, despite my pain. That drove me for about 4 years until I was in college, and the other shoe finally dropped.
When things got really bad my junior year of college and I finally actually sought treatment I was severely depressed and suicidal because of the pain. But luckily I already had the diagnosis, which is usually the hard part, and in the intervening four years the treatment options had really changed. I was finally able to get some treatment, both opioid and non-opioid pain medicine, started physical therapy, bio feedback, acupuncture, the whole 9 yards. But the habit was already there, the relationship had already been formed. I have struggled since with admitting how much pain I’m in, and letting myself take the time I need to really manage it, but I’m so used to letting it push me. I’m better at it now almost 10 years later, but I can still fall back into that habit when I have something like a deadline to meet.
I did also learn how to use my pain in my craft. Around the same time as my pain was getting bad I was really developing my traveling skill with Oisin as my teacher. I found my pain was something that I could use to help me in that. With a lot of practice I was able to sort of let my pain wash over me until I wasn't aware of anything else, and then I could let go of my body easier. It was like I could dive down deep into the pain, go through it, and step out into the Otherworlds. I've gotten so good at this method that on particularly bad pain days I’ve found this method to be incredibly fast. There’s been some struggle over the years with not using this skill to avoid my pain, but it has simultaneously really helped me to shift my mindset about my pain as see it as a useful tool rather than as an adversary or a detriment.
From there I started to think about how else I could use my pain in witchcraft and in my religion. I sling a nasty curse because I share my pain liberally when necessary. But I also have a whole ritual that I undertake as part of my devotion to Brona where I take on some of the pain from others, lighten their load. Because what’s a little more when I know I can manage it?
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fandom-imagines · 4 years ago
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Little Miss Favourite
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing: Teacher!Snape X Legal!Granger!Reader 
Warnings: Teacher x student relationship x)
Words: 2.5k 
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It would be a lie to say that the Granger sisters weren’t incredibly smart, anyone could see it. Whilst Hermione, the younger sibling, was exceptionally talented with spells, Y/N was talented in the art of potion making; not that she wasn’t talented at other things also.
Due to her consistently high scores in potions, Y/N had caught the attention of her favourite teacher: Severus Snape, despite his annoyance towards the younger Granger. Whilst he found Hermione insufferable, Y/N was more than tolerable in his honest opinion; not that he would ever admit that to anyone, maybe not even himself.
Perhaps it was her confident personality, her boldness or her smarts, Severus would never know. Of course, it wasn’t only him that had his attention focused on her, many people did. Those people included Hermione’s friends. Y/N knew this, how could she not? The way Harry did his best to show off whilst Hermione rolled her eyes and Ron got all embarrassed, it was obvious; at least to her. Even though her personalist screamed confident, she wasn’t mean like other people at Hogwarts, not often at least.  
“Morning Professor,” her words were sweet as she greeted the dark-haired man, early as always.
“Good morning, Miss Granger,” Snapes tone was kinder than usual, but without it being clear. To anyone else, it would seem normal.
“Got a date for the Yule Ball yet, sir?” Whilst her question was genuine and not flirtatious, Severus couldn’t help but wish it was.
“Why would I bother with something as childish as having a date?”
“I shall take that as a no,”
He could hear the stool she usually seated at drag out from beneath the desk before she seated herself on top of it.
“What about you Miss Granger?” Y/N, who had forgotten what she had previously asked him, was confused at his question. “Surely someone like you must have a date,”
A sight blush ran up her cheeks at his words, eyes wide.
“No sir,” she giggled. “Not interested in anyone that’s asked me.”
Her words caught his attention, eyes glancing towards her for a split second before returning to the work he was marking. It was Harry Potters; he could almost roll his eyes.
“Why is that?”
“Immature men that feel like I should go with them because they’re popular? No thank you, give me a mature and unentitled man any day,”
For the second time in five minutes her words caught his attention, suddenly distracted by what she had said rather than being distracted by Potter’s work.
“I see,”
It wasn’t long until the rest of her class began to pile into the dungeon, taking their usual seats as Fred and George came to sit beside her at their typical desk.
“Morning, Y/N/N,” the greeted in perfect synergy, almost as though it had been rehearsed but she knew better than to expect that and simply laughed.
“We heard something,” Fred began.
“Potter is wanting to ask you to be his date to the Yule Ball.” George finished, the twins laughing at Y/N’s shocked face.
“Please say you’re joking,” she pleaded, desperately hoping that it wasn’t true. “He’s so much younger than me!”
“Oh and Hermione is going with Krum,”
“This day just gets worse and worse,”
“Weasleys, detention.” A harsh voice interrupted their conversation as to be expected.
“But sir!” They groaned, once again in unison. “She was talking too!”
“Not as much as you two.”
*
The great hall was quiet, everyone there working on their essays, everyone being the fourth years. Fortunately for her, Y/N was allowed to sit and work alongside the younger students having been given permission by Professor Snape himself.
“Hey Y/N,” Harry’s quiet voice pulled her attention away from the parchment in front of her. “I was just wondering-“ His words were soon cut off by a hand shoving his head into his own parchment.
“Silence,”
“Yes, Professor Snape.”
An amused smirk covered Y/N’s lips as she turned her own attention back to the work in front of her that was soon to be finished.
“Later guys,” she shot the trio one last smile as she walked towards Snape, handing him her essay with a small smile, one he almost wished to return.
“I’m sure this will be as excellent as always, Granger.”
“I sure hope so, sir.”
With one final nod, Severus dismissed her.
*
Music blasted throughout the hall as the Tri-wizard champions begun to dance with their partners. Y/N and her own date, who ended up being George due to both forgetting about the dance until the night before, stood laughing at Ron’s dress robes.
“He looks like our great aunt,” George chuckled, his words making Y/N snort in amusement.
“Poor kid. He looks so embarrassed,” she giggled.
“Well, looks like its our turn to dance. Care to join me, Granger?” George grinned, offering him her hand which she gladly took.
“After you, but can you even dance?”
“Nope,”
“Good, me neither.”
Their dance was horrendous, and they were both glad when the music ended, the pair running off the dance floor in laughter, hands still together.
“That was- “George began, only to have his sentence finished by his dance partner.
“Dreadful?”
“Yeah,”
Their fit of laughter was cut short by another voice joining the conversation. “Nice dancing guys!”
“Shut up, Fred!” This time it was Y/N and George’s turn to speak in unison, something that triggered a smirk to grow on Fred’s lips.
“Alright, alright, calm down you two,”
*
“I almost feel bad for him,” Fred chuckled, catching George and Y/N’s attention as they followed his gaze.
“I would but he gave us detention and not her, talk about favouritism!”
An idea popped into Y/N’s head, as she removed herself from the twins’ arms.
“Where are you going, Y/N/N?” Fred asked. “Wait are you-“
“I feel bad for him, okay!”
The twins burst into laughter as they realised her plan.
“I bet you my entire allowance that she can’t get him to dance,” Fred whispered as they watched Y/N walking towards Snape.
“You’re on,”
*
“Evening, Professor,” Y/N greeted, desperately trying her best to not show her nervousness.
“Good evening, Miss Granger,” He returned her greeting, turning his attention fully to her. “Shouldn’t you be with your date?”
“George? No, we both forgot we needed dates, so we went together. He’ll cope on his own,” The girl giggled, glancing back at said man to see both twins smirking at her. “You look lonely, want to dance?”
“Do I look like the sort of person to dance?”
“Do I?” She joked, enjoying the small smirk that pulled up at his lips. “It’ll be one dance and then I’ll let you go back to enjoying your own company. It’s a teacher and student dance anyway!”
*
“No way…” Fred gasped, watching as Snape and Y/N headed to the dancefloor.
“I knew she could do it! You now owe me your entire allowance,”
“Shit,”
*
“See it wasn’t too bad, was it, Professor?” Y/N giggled, aware of the fact that everyone had been staring at her dancing with Snape.
“You stepped on my foot at least three times,”
“I said I don’t dance!”
She celebrated a silent victory as Snape shook his head, a small smile pulling at his lips.
“This is true,”
“Welp, I’ll leave you to enjoy your own company again!” The older Granger grinned, giving him one final nod as she headed by to the twins who were still in shock.
“Shut your mouth, Fred. You’ll catch flies,” Y/N smirked, placing her hand on Fred’s chin to shut up mouth that had been open since she managed to convince Snape to dance.
“Did you bewitch him or something?! How on earth did you manage to get him to dance?” George asked in shock.
“Night guys, thanks for the fun time.” She winked, downing the rest of her drink that she had left before leaving the hall to head to bed.
*
“Miss Granger, you’re late,” Snapes’ words ran throughout the dungeon.
It was strange, how he knew it was her before he had even turned around to face her.
“Sorry Professor, I had a detention.”
“Well now you have another, stay after class.”  
*
“Good luck, Snapes detentions are horrible,” George chuckled, giving Y/N a reassuring pat on the back.
“Yeah, we would know, Miss Favourite,” Fred chimed in with his typical teasing tone.
“Thanks, that makes me feel better. I’ll see you guys later,”
“Good luck.”
The second everyone had left the classroom, Snapes attention was on her.
“So why did you get a detention?” His words were questioning, not malicious. It was almost as though he was genuinely curious.
“I got in a duel,” Y/N shook her head with a slight laugh. “Malfoy was being, well Malfoy. So, yeah.”
A grin covered her lips as Snape shook his head in slight amusement; it was cute in a way.
“Next time don’t get caught, it makes my classes a lot easier,”
“Got ya, Professor,”
“Good, you may leave,”
*
“That was quick, did he have to leave?” Fred, who had been waiting outside for about two minutes, asked.
“Little miss favourite,” were her only words as she shot Fred a wink, just like she had done at the ball a few weeks ago.
“I swear he has a crush on you or something,”
“Yeah, imagine. Professor Severus Snape developing a crush on a student, nice one George. Why are you two even here?”
The twins, who had been caught red-handed, shared an amused look, quickly rushing into action by grasping Y/N’s arms, tugging her along.
“We need someone to test our latest concoction!” They spoke in unison.
“No, no way! Merlin knows what you’ve put in that!”
“Either you help us, or we’ll tell everyone about your little crush on the potions professor,”
“Fine.”
*
“Fred and George Weasley, you come here this instance!” Y/N’s voice shrieked, her words echoing throughout the entire Gryffindor common room.
“Run!” Was all she heard, followed by laughter and footsteps leaving through the portrait.
Y/N rushed after them, hell bent on causing as much annoyance to them as they had to her.
“I will kill you!”
“That’s not very nice now, is it? You love us really,” George teased her once more before darting away.
“George Weasley I am faster than you and you know it!”
It wasn’t a lie, Y/N had been, and always will be, faster than him. No matter how many pranks they had to run away from, the twins would never be able to outrun her.
“What have you done to my hair?!” Y/N demanded to know the second she caught both boys by the collar of their robes. “Please say this comes out, I don’t want my hair to be yellow and green forever, I hate it!”
“Well you see, Y/N/N,” Fred chuckled with a hint of nervousness. “We don’t know, you’re our first consumer!”
“Fred, I am begging you, I look like a lollipop.”
“I’m sure you taste as sweet as one too, Y/N,” a Slytherin by-passer commented, clearly having heard the entire conversation.
“Shut th-“
“Detention and ten points from Slytherin,”
Fred, George and Y/N shared a terrified look as Professor Snape stood behind the trio.
“Trying a new style are we, Granger? It is quite bold,” despite the blunt words, there was an almost undetectable teasing tone laced in his words.
“Not willingly, Professor,”
“Then why did you do it?”
“They blackmailed me!”
“With what?”
The twins smirked at each other, as though they were sent on a mission to ruin her day.
“She has a crush, Professor,” George smirked at the, now multi-coloured haired, girl.
“George Weasley!” In a swift movement, Y/N rushed towards the ginger, only to be stopped by a hand holding her robe. “Professor let me go!”
“Isn’t she cute, Fred?”
“Adorable, George,”
“I hate you both.” Y/N, who had accepted her fate of being held my Snape (which didn’t seem too bad in all honesty), sighed.
“You love us really,”
“You wish, Fredrick.”
“Don’t call me that!”
“If you three have quite finished,” Snape interrupted their quarrel. “I think I know how to remove that colour from your hair, Miss Granger. Follow me.” There was no room for debate as the potions master turned and rushed towards his classroom.
“I’ll kill you,” Y/N mouthed before rushing after him.
*
“Sit,” Snape said, lightly kicking a stool out towards Y/N before walking towards a cupboard that, she assumed, had potions or at least ingredients for them.
“Are you sure this will work, Professor? I really don’t want anyone else to see me like this,”
“You mean you don’t want your crush to see you like this?” He said with a raised eyebrow.
“He already has,” her words were a mere murmur, but it was one Severus had heard.
“The Slytherin?” Snape asked whilst he grabbed a weird looking liquid. “Here drink.”
“Merlin, no. I don’t even know who that was. This tastes disgusting,”
“Do you want the colour gone or not?”
“Sorry,”
Snape let out a small sigh, his arms crossing by habit.
“Potter, perhaps?”
“Are we playing guess the crush or something?”
“Well, we have time. This needs a second dose in around thirty minutes,”
Now it was Y/N’s turn to sigh.
“It’s probably not a good idea to play this game with me,” she joked. “I’m quite competitive,”
“You would have done well in Slytherin,”
“I doubt it,”
“Under me you would have done brilliantly. You are doing brilliantly already.”
A bright red blush ran up Y/N’s cheeks at his use of words.
“You should be careful what you say, Professor. Someone might interpret your words wrong,”
“That someone being you?”
“Perhaps,”
“I see.”
An awkward silence filled the air, something that was uncommon between the pair.
“I’m sorry, that was a bit straight-forward,”
“Yeah, it was.”
“Sorry,”
“Don’t be,”
Whilst his reply was short, the words caught her attention, her head spinning to face him.
“Don’t be?”
“I said what I said.” Came his simple response.
“I don’t understand,”
“Maybe little miss favourite should do some thinking,”
“Oh…” She whispered. “Oh! Here I am thinking I’m just a teacher’s pet,”
He smiled slightly. “Not quite, Miss Granger,”
Footsteps echoed throughout the dungeon as he walked towards Y/N, his fingers lightly pushing against her chin to bring her to face him, her cheeks as red as flames.
“So, I’m your little miss favourite?”
“Clearly,”
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kkusuka · 4 years ago
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Anatomy lessons <3 
ushijima wakatoshi x reader 
genre: smut 
synopsis: ushijima is helplessly devoted to volleyball, and his grades reflect that. 
cw: anatomically fem reader, vaginal fingering, blowjob (i think that’s it, if anything seems left out let me know!)
a/n: all i could think about is that ushiwaka is canonically stupid and i love that. 
based o this request: Studying anatomy and using your body as a physical map- Ushijima ((smut)) I’ve had this imagine suck in my head about Ushijima but like just picture this, Ushijima and Y/N studying together and they both like each other but Ushi doesn’t know how to act on his emotions and Y/N can’t tell if he likes them so they are just running around in circles pinning for each other, but anyways Ushi is studying for anatomy but he just can’t get the female anatomy to stick into his head and he’s getting a bit frustrated and so Y/N is like well I’m a female, you can practice on me and he’s like well shit. Y/N lays down Ushi is gliding his hands over their body as he names the muscles and whatnot, they both get a bit hot and bothered and when Ushi finishes “studying”he’s got an awkward boner and Y/N is like “now it’s my turn to study your anatomy” and they push ushi down and 🤪🤪🤪 please give this to me I’ve been thinking about it ALL DAY!!! -✨Puppy🤩
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Shiratorizawa’s reputation was built upon intelligence and elegance.
The students are of the highest degree in not only book-smarts but also athletics. Only the most talented and were persons were allowed in the walls of the academy. Hell, the entrance exam resembled an AP college exam.
“I do not understand.”
Of course, there are always loopholes.
The first being an athletic scholarship. One of the more annoying ways to make it into the school, according to the students. You don't mean to sound mean but, it was blatantly obvious when someone is on athletic help.
But that wasn't what you were dealing with right now. No, it was something the students found way worse.  
A recommendation.
Actually, it was an athletic recommendation.
Ushijima Wakatoshi was known before he had even appeared.
You had been the lucky one to sit next to him first, and second, and somehow third year. And through that, you’ve learned more than a few things about him.
Firstly, he was the most amazing volleyball player you have ever seen. He also had so much passion for the sport that it had seemed to rub off on you. By the end of first-year gym class, you knew how to receive a light spike of his.
Second, he was extremely easy to fall in love with. For being constantly aloof and oblivious, he had this pull to him that just roped you in. at first you weren't sure what you felt for the bot, then he had helped you with a project ending the night with a smile and you were done for.
He was also incredibly easy to stay in love with. Once he had your attention he was almost the only person you thought of. Plaguing your mind with fluffy fake dates and worries that he would never like you back.
But he hasn’t said anything for you to believe either of those situations so you sit at a constant stalemate.
And thirdly, he was not only dense but utterly stupid. How was someone so sought after so completely unaware of admiration? Not only his social unawareness, but he was also not the smartest when it came to school.
Then you swooped in, raised his grades a few points, and became his official homework helper. You thought it was a blessing, more time with the man who had your heart, but you underestimated just how much help he needed.
You had no idea how many times you would have to explain the Pythagorean theorem to someone before they understood. (you're sure now that he didn't really understand and he just didn't want to hear it again.)
And anatomy was no exception.
“That’s alright Toshi, do you want to try looking at a different diagram? That might help!”
Opening a new book, you spent another ten minutes staring at the page just looking at it, before staring back up at you. And that's your cue. No more diagrams, he was never going to learn like that.
This was what you called plan visual. somethings, namely science, were better learned but seeing and not memorization.
Letting out a sigh, you closed all of the books and told him to do the same.
“Ok, here’s what’s going to happen.” placing yourself directly in front of the cross-legged man, garnering his full attention, “I'm going to give you an arm and a leg  and, let's start with the skeletal system, so just tell me all the bones you can remember.”
Lending your hand you took it in his and gave you a nod. Going up the length of your arm finishing at your shoulder blade, he moved to run a hand along your un-bending leg. Starting at your ankle he kept a constant hand on the back of your knee, keeping your leg hanging in the air.
A few mixed up bones later you finally moved on to muscles. Not only did it take far longer but you could tell he was getting frustrated, if the hand gripping your thigh as he tried to name all the muscles there was any telling.
On his fifth try, you gave him some help and just decided to move on, seeing that it wasn't needed for him to know blood vessels just yet, there was only one other thing he had to do.
Male and female anatomy.
You had tried to avoid the topic but that seemed almost impossible at the moment.
“Is something wrong Y/n?” As he spoke you became all too aware of his hand still on your thigh and how he was staring right at you like he could tell exactly what you were thinking, “the next topic is the reproductive system correct?”
“Erm, ye-yeah, but we don’t have to-”
“Don't be silly, we have to get through all the material that will be on the test. May I have the textbook to reference from?” he spoke as if he was ordering food, completely nonchalant. As if his hand wasn't reaching into your skirt and sliding your panties to the side.
“This unit does not require the breasts so you can keep your shirt on.” he continued to slide your underwear from your legs flipping your skirt, pushing you onto your back. Maneuvering you to how he wanted, you holding your legs spread open and close to your chest, he got to work.
“The outer lips, formally known as the labia majora,” he spoke as he ran a finger down, spreading them open to e your hole clench around nothing.  He let out a breath and intently stared at your core.
“Labia minora, inner lips.” running another finger along your lips he collected the wetness that had collected on them, bringing it to his mouth, maintaining eye contact as he licked it clean. “A woman creates a natural lubrication to aid in intercourse.”
Deliberately avoiding your clit, he moved to the urethral opening, passing it quickly. Moving to run a hand along your stomach placing where he thought your cervix and womb lay.
“The clitoris, an organ that is completely dedicated to pleasure.” his thumb rubbing small circles around your bud was the final opus for you to let out all the soft whimpers you had so desperately wanted to let out.
Eye’s shooting to meet yours his thumb moved quicker, drawing more pants and wanton moans from your throat.
“Please Toshi, I wanna-”
Your beg must've ripped him away from whatever daydream he lost himself in, roping his thumb away from your clit, a whine escaping you, he moved to his final destination.
“The vaginal hole, where a man enters a woman and makes her his own. It leads straight through the cervix into the womb.” right as he finished two fingers shoved their way into your pussy.
Reattaching his thumb to your clit, he coaxed moan after moan out of you.
Hitting a spot somewhere deep in you, cunt spasming as he rode out you high with slow strokes, “the g-spot, a small area that aids with the female orgasm.”
Taking his fingers to his mouth once more, he watched you let your legs down and close your eyes to help calm your roaring heart. In your bliss, you felt two lips connect to yours, a soft dance between new lovers.
A forehead rested on your hands and ran up and down your sides placing you back into a sitting position.
“y/n?”
“Hmm?”
“We still have one more thing to do.”
Oh right, this lesson was a two-way street.
Crawling to kneel between his crossed legs you palmed his bulge as he leaned back on the chair, bringing his hands behind his head. He watched you take his cock out of its restraints, wrapping your lips around the tip leaning his pre-cum.
He let you pace yourself, don't complain when you came up to explain what you were doing to what.
On the contrary, you could tell all he wanted to do was push your head down and keep it there until his load stuffed your throat. Realizing this was probably the last time you would have control over the boy.
But all seems worth it when he shows you the A+ on the anatomy test.
Maybe Ushijima Wakatoshi is a good student after all.
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ac3id · 4 years ago
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Plaything | 18+
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plaything 0/ ?? | part 1
pairings: yandere! bully bakugou katsuki x fem! reader
warnings: [series] blackmail, bullying, dubcon/ noncon, filming w/o consent, yandere themes, no quirks au. ALL CHARACTERS ARE ABOVE 18 YEARS OF AGE.
↪ for chapter 0: dubcon, blackmail, humiliation.
summary: by luck, you get enrolled into u.a high the best school in your town. the only catch is that the school is filled with rich, spoilt, and powerful brats who just seem to hate you, and among them, a certain red-eyed blonde dreads you the most
↪ for chapter 0: you reject bakugou’s proposal to fuck in the dirty boys' washroom so he teaches you a lesson.
— navigation
wordcount. 2k+
a/n: hello !! so this is like a little introduction to my yandere! bully! bakugou series fic. there’s also going to a lot of other bnha character mentions but the main pairing will be w/ baku n reader. enjoy!
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“bakugou, i don’t want to do this,” your voice is weak as you bite on your lower lip, trying to stop sinful moans from leaking out of your mouth. bakugo has you bent over the cold and wet sink counter, your chest pressed against the dirty marble while your skirt is flipped over your displaying your bare, perky round ass to his stalking eyes. “who are you calling bakugo?” he spanks your ass with force, making you lose your footing as your head bumps lightly against the mirror.
“sorry, master,” you answer barely above a whisper but it’s loud enough in the empty washroom for him to hear yet he makes you repeat yourself,
“what was that, brat? i couldn’t fucking hear you.” he spanks you again, his heavy hand coming in contact with your soft ass with ferocity sending you flying off your feet.
“i am sorry, master!” you exclaim a little loudly, hoping it would satisfy him. and it does. he scoffs crudely, ghosting his fingers over your pussy lips before dipping his large fingers between them and petting your dry hole. he plays with your cunt, stroking his fingers lovingly over your little pearl, gathering wetness as he slips one finger into your hole. pumping them in and out at a slow pace. he takes his time, building up your orgasm while laughing wickedly as you try to hold in your moans. his fingers inside your cunt increase their pace as your juices start dripping down to your thighs,
“you said you don’t want this?” while his right hand destroys your cunt, his other hand wraps around your small neck. grasping it lightly, making it harder for you to breathe. “why are you dripping everywhere like a slut? hm?”
he had pulled you aside from regular classes, declaring them boring as fuck and that he wanted to do something much better like; fucking you in the boys' washroom. you denied, you told him no. you wanted to attend the lesson and besides skipping with him wouldn’t be any good to you. he was not kind to you, he was a meanie. he still insisted; telling you it’s fine, he knows the material. he can just tutor you later. no harm done, see? see?
if there was anything you hated more than being stuck in the prestigious u.a. high where everyone seemed to be out for your blood was spending time with bakugo katsuki. and being with him alone was another nightmare. he hated you. you didn’t know why, he’d never say why. you just assumed it was because of that one time you accidentally spilled coffee on him or maybe it was just because you breathed. honestly, both seemed favorable in this situation.
after many failed attempts of convincing you to come with him, he gets fed up. he pulls out his phone and shoves it into your face. his screen displays pictures of you which he had taken before and the ones which you had sent him. they are all lewd shots. pictures of you sucking him off while looking into the camera with glassy eyes illuminated the screen and as you swiped right it changed to another with the same background, lighting, and angle but the only difference being that your face was now covered with his seed while you posed for the camera with an innocent smile.
a look deeper into his gallery and you find your nudes which bakugo had forced you to take. it was necessary for you to be naked with your tits and ass being visible, he also wanted to see your face and would never settle for anything else. he never settles for anything without your face in it, makes you take those shots again and again until he’s satisfied with the results. he saves them, all of them. even the ‘bad ones' have been screenshotted and saved onto his phone for his personal use. he never tells what he uses them for but you don’t need to hear it from him. you already know he’s jerking off to each one of them every night before he goes to sleep.
it’s funny, anyone could take a look at those pictures and find out they are not photos exchanged between lovers. your expressions- no matter how hard you try, you always end up looking like you want to cry. there’s fear in your eyes and it just doesn’t feel authentic. it looks forced. like someone had put a gun to your head while you sat and took them. and well, that’s not a far-fetched idea.
he promises these are for his eyes only, “no one else gets to you like this. you are mine.” his words exactly but when his friends also start staring at you with lust-ridden eyes, you can’t help but question his words.
he blackmails you into coming with him. threatening he’d leak those pictures all around the school if you didn’t come with him as if he hadn’t already. as if your compromising photos weren’t already saved in all of your classmates’ phones anyway. bakugo should give himself a pat on the back, he’s such a great actor!
“for someone who doesn’t want this,” his demeaning, rude voice pulls you back from the dreamland you were trying to escape to. he forces you nearer to your edge, tiny whimpers leave your lips accompanied with loud moans as his fingers brush deliciously against your sweet spot. your precious cunt greedily pulls him in deeper and deeper, inviting him graciously into your womb but unfortunately, his fingers aren’t that long. but you know what is?
“you sure are dripping like a whore.” with every whimper which leaves your supple lips, bakugo feels himself get harder. his pants tighten as a bulge starts straining against his expensive, pleated bottoms. the hand prettily choking your neck detaches itself leaving you inhaling puffs of air as he works his pants off his hips. as you hear the rattling of his belt coming undone, a loud cry enough to draw attention from others outside of the room leaves your throat.
it catches bakugo off guard but nonetheless helps him get even harder, he likes to make you cry and get off to it. “why are you crying, bitch? it’s not doing you any favors here.” his fingers rub against your swollen, little pearl while lining up his fat cock to your blinking hole. “please, bakugo, don’t. i will do anything, anything else. just not this, i’ve never done this before.” you sound pathetic. your voice breaking with every word you utter. big, fat tears rolling down your cheeks while you ugly cried. bakugo almost feels sorry.
but in all honesty, he really couldn't care less about you. all your whining and crying only incite him further as ruthless ideas to break you down flood his mind. the kindest so far being him taking you right here and now but, but a sudden flash of seeing you utterly broken and in misery flashed before his eyes and he couldn’t let go of it. he wanted to see you tremble much more than you were right now. he wanted to see you cry much more than you were crying right now. Maybe he did hate you, he always pushed you around like you were his little pet of some sort to prove a point- that he is better than you. he is superior, you must respect him. you should kiss the ground he walks on, you should let yourself be his little plaything. then maybe, he’ll let you loose? who knows, he might just get even more obsessed.
as he watches you cry beneath him, your pathetic whimpers reverberating off the marble walls, a wicked idea pops into his head. he pulls his dick away from your exposed hole instead, replacing it with his fingers like before. “fine, brat.” his voice is softer, it surprises you. was he not going to rape you after all? “just because you said anything.” there it is again, the edge in his voice that makes you regret what you said. now, you know he has something worse planned for you. but it’s too late, you can’t go against your word now. you said anything, get ready to do anything. “stop squirming, i’m trying to make you cum. god knows whether you can even do that for yourself.” you most definitely can.
"a bitch like you needs someone to do everything for her.” again, you are probably the most independent student in the whole school,
“am I right, princess?” you are so wrong. “yes, master.”
no matter how crude and humiliating his words were and how much you hated his voice, you still found yourself clenching around his fingers almost ripping them off. your cunt squeezed his digits tightly as the coil building in your stomach tightened. moans of his name echoed all over the room as you felt yourself come closer. bakugo was taking his time playing with you, drawing you out making your release painfully slow as a form of revenge. you begged for him to play with your little clit so you could achieve ecstasy but he was too petty. after minutes of agonizing you to the point, there were tears streaming down your face and drool escaping your lips, falling onto the wet counter. he finally decided to flick his finger against your hardened bud. rubbing tight circles, he played with it aimlessly until he felt the gush of wetness around his fingers and the high-pitched scream which left your mouth as you came. his other hand pumped his still-hard cock. he was still pissed that he wouldn’t be able to cum inside you but it was fine for now. he had something much brutal set up in his mind for his plaything, he was aware that what he was planning might completely destroy but he figured it was worth it. much better to have a mindless slave who lives to fulfill her master’s wishes anyway.
he lets go of you, backing away with his hard cock still out and aching for relief. the huge head blushed red and leaking with pre, too bad he won’t get to finish inside of you yet. you quickly walk away from him, bending forward to search for your discarded panties. bakugo grunts at the sight of your wet pussy presenting itself to him, riling him up even more than he already was. He wastes no time pumping his cock at the sight of your exposed bottom, gasp and groans of pleasure escaping his lips,
“oi, what the fuck are you doing?” he asks, catching you sliding your panties on your legs. you turn around to face him, face burning when you are met with him stroking his cock at your movements. your eyes almost can’t leave the sight of his leaking cock, hard and begging to be played with and as much as you to admit it; it lights a fire inside you.
“stop fucking staring, you’re making it worse,” he growls and you immediately turn your eyes to his face. he smirks, “what? do you want it now? too bad, it’s too late,” he taunts. his eyes trail your body, eyebrows furrowing when he looks down your legs. “who told you to wear them,” he points at your panties between your legs. you give him a confused look, “you’re not allowed to put them on. give them to me,” he commands and panic crosses your eyes. you hesitate for a moment, debating whether you should listen to him or not. his fists clench as he glares at you, sending shivers down your spine, “what are looking at! give!” he speaks louder this time in a demanding tone as if he was scolding a little child who had picked up something from his office. your fingers tremble as you reach out to give the pink fabric to him, “leave.” what? you look at him in confusion. your big, doe eyes racking fear and anxiety. you wait for him to laugh or make a sarcastic remark about how gullible you are but it never comes. instead, he wraps your cotton panties around his cock, right in front of you, and begins jerking himself off. you are disgusted and petrified by his shameless actions, “what are you standing here for? leave. remember you said anything?” yeah, so you did. and you regret it already.
your legs tremble as you walk towards the door, pushing it open and peaking your head to check for people in the hallway. once you find it empty you walk out to the outside before sparing one last glance inside the dirty washroom. you hope for bakugo to call out to you, call you back but all you see is him cumming thick ropes into your panties while his eyes are screwed shut in ecstasy. yeah, you weren’t getting those back.
with shame and defeat written all over your face, you make your back to your classroom. your face is heated with embarrassment and humiliation as you remember you are walking around practically naked just an accident away from flashing yourself to anyone who cares to see. for the better half of the day, you walk around tugging your skirt as low as it can get. you don’t see bakugo for the rest of the day as he leaves you alone but when you do catch his eyes for a second or two, the wicked grin stretching over his features is hard to miss. He knows exactly what he is doing.
just as the day is about to end, he walks behind you squeezing your bare ass from under your skirt managing a surprised shriek from you when you feel his warm palms caress your ass pervertedly, “cute.” he whispers in your ear before turning you around and pinning you the wall. his fingers slide up your thighs moving closer to your cunt. warm digits graze over your slit earning a gasp from you, “come over, I will tutor you on the subjects you missed.” he kisses your neck, “come just like this.” he spanks your ass lightly before he leaves you be. his words are absolute and you know better than to disobey him, all of this was happening because you disobeyed him. you gather your things and walk up to his dorm room dressed just as you were before: in your school shirt, blazer, skirt, and no panties just as he wants it. when you arrive in his room you are met with his entire friend group sitting there with their books and pencils out. kaminari, kirishima and sero are not as surprised to see you as you are to see them. they greet you with happy faces which you return with a light smile.
“hey,” bakugo says with a smirk, guiding you to sit between sero and kirishima. between them the two humongous men, you feel like a child. with kirishima being tall and muscular and Sero being tall, lean and surprisingly packing a few too, makes you feel like a dwarf. you feel small and tiny in their presence and they very much notice it, sending knowing looks to one another while bakugo tries to tutor you. you know something’s up.
not a lot of studying takes place as kirishima grows impatient and slides his hand under your skirt and settles it over your cunt, rubbing his fingers on your pussy lips, occasionally pressing them on your clit. sero flips your skirt displaying your naked cunt to peering eyes. kaminari whistles, “wow, she really wasn’t wearing anything the entire day,” he comments. with one hand, Kirishima captures your wrists behind your back and pushes you on his lap. sero holds your legs to prevent you from squirming around like a dead fish, trying to break free. “so who goes first?” kaminari asks, walking over to you and crouching at your level. kirishima holds tightly with him seated on bakugo’s bed, kaminari flashes you a charming smile before his fingers run to unbutton your t-shirt, pulling your tits out of your bra. he tugs on one of your nipples while kishima’s large digits tugs on another.
“obviously me, dumbass.” bakugo barks coming closer to you. tears prick at your eyes as you beg him to stop, you tell him you’re sorry and that you will never disobey him ever again but he’s too far gone. the other men in the room might feel a little shitty about what they were going to do but there is no remorse in bakugo’s eyes. he looks at you like a predator looks at his prey, stalking about to pounce at any given second, “shut up, whore. you asked for this.” tears break loose as kirishima starts spreading your legs on command. wandering fingers rubbing at your pussy, trying to get you ready are forced to stop as bakugo declares that it must hurt for you. he wouldn’t have it any other way.
“you know you should have never said no to me right? be grateful for what’s being given to you, you’re our little plaything. a cute, little slut. you don’t get to say no,” his rough fingers grab at your jaw, prying it open as he spits in your mouth. “now just shut up and take our cocks, okay?” you cry out yes but he’s not satisfied. His hand strikes against your face, your cheek stings with burning hot pain as more tears leak out of your eyes. grabbing your face harshly, he lifts it up so you’re facing him, “okay?” he repeats. you calm your breath before answering him, fear and anxiety fucking you up in dread for what’s to come.
“yes, master,” you say in the most submissive voice you make out.
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allthefilmsiveseenforfree · 3 years ago
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Dear Evan Hansen
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You may have seen some ~online discourse~ about the film Dear Evan Hansen, an adaptation of the 2016 Broadway musical, and you might have wondered what all the hubbub is about. I mean, it’s a feel good story about a senior in high school, Evan Hansen (Ben Platt), who has some pretty severe anxiety and depression. While trying to fulfill an assignment from his therapist to write a letter to himself, his letter gets picked up by another student, Connor (Colton Ryan) - and later that day, Connor kills himself. Connor’s grieving parents and sister Zoe (Amy Adams, Danny Pino, and Kaitlyn Dever) are desperate to learn more from the boy they think was Connor’s best friend - after all, Connor’s suicide note was a letter addressed to “Dear Evan Hansen.” And, as you can imagine, Evan tells them about the unfortunate mistake and sits with them in their grief as they struggle to pick up the pieces of their lives. 
Just kidding! He lies to them, repeatedly, elaborately, expansively for months, constructing an entire false friendship with Connor that never happened, and ingratiating himself into the wealthy nuclear family he never had, in large part because he wants to get into Zoe’s pants! THIS IS THE PROTAGONIST OF THE STORY. Oh, and it’s a musical so there is a lot of singing and crying and singing WHILE crying and sometimes crying and not singing at all. But the #inspiration, you guys. 
Things I liked:
Pretty much everything but the story and Ben Platt’s performance. The supporting cast is stacked, and all of them do a great job at elevating material scraped directly out of a diaper worn by someone who just chewed their way through a copy of the DSM-5. 
A couple of the songs are damn catchy - “Waving Through a Window” and “You Will Be Found” are standouts for a reason - and here’s the thing, Platt sings them well. But as you’ll discover, there’s a lot more to a movie musical than just singing your part. 
Stephen Chbosky, the man behind every deep thought I and a lot of people in my generation had in 2006 after he wrote The Perks of Being a Wallflower, is a pretty good director. I particularly enjoyed the fanvid-type cuts in “Waving Through a Window” in conjunction with the lyrics, and his use of interstitial shots to flashbacks (and sometimes flashforwards!) is a neat little bit of shorthand that I thought was used sparingly enough to be effective. 
Amy Fucking Adams. She’s holding on so hard, so desperately to the idea of who her son could have been, rather than the reality of who he was, and she is full of such deep pain that is masked by an almost endless supply of patience with Evan and relentless positivity. All this made me want was Enchanted 2 even worse than I already did. 
Super into everything Zoe wears - the costuming department did a great job, and now all I want to do is live in mom jeans and baggy sweaters.
Did I Cry? I teared up a couple of times because I’m not a completely heartless bastard and when Amy Adams offered Evan Connor’s college money, my heart broke for the lie Evan had thrust upon her, and Julianne Moore’s song got me good, because she’s just a single mom to Evan who is doing her goddamn best. 
Things I hated more than the time I dropped a frozen gallon container of fruit cocktail on my pinkie toe in my parents’ garage and it turned black and I thought it was gonna fall off:
Ben Platt is 28 years old. He originated the role of Evan Hansen on Broadway, so in many respects it makes sense that he plays the role in the movie, except for the one kinda sorta important thing where he looks like a wizened old crone standing amongst a sea of children doing his best twitching, cringing Hunchback of Notre Dame impression. If you want someone to convincingly play 20 years their junior, hire Paul Rudd. Otherwise, please don’t ask me to believe that this supposed 18-year-old has crow’s feet. 
And that twitching nervous energy is a huge part of the black hole at the center of this film - he’s playing to the cheap seats and walking through the halls of his high school like a wet chihuahua. It’s an excruciating acting choice to watch - he doesn’t just have anxiety, he is on the verge of a nervous breakdown seemingly every second of every day. Like honestly, where is only-mentioned-never-seen Dr. Sherman, because this young man’s meds are NOT WORKING DR. SHERMAN. 
There’s such a lack of self-awareness on behalf of the writing, directing, and performance by Platt. There’s one song, “Sincerely, Me,” that offers the only glimpse of commentary about what Evan is doing, by pointing out the malicious ridiculousness of him writing a series of fake emails as proof of his and Connor’s friendship. 
Also what high schoolers email this much?? I know this was written in probably 2014 or so, but has a bitch never heard of a text? Even a DM? This whole plot is constructed around the premise that high schoolers are just constantly, constantly emailing each other. 
Everything - and I mean EV-ER-Y-THING - about Evan’s relationship with Zoe is so creepy and disturbing that with a soundtrack change, this could easily be a horror movie. He attempts to get her to like him by describing to her all the things her brother noticed about her - oh wait, I’m sorry, all the things HE noticed about her while he was skulking in the shadows following her around for years, watching every move she made, and it ends with him singing repeatedly “I LOVE YOU” because following a girl around and never having a conversation with her or knowing her at all is love, right? This was clearly written by the same people who chose “Every Breath You Take” as their wedding song because Sting is hot and they never actually listened to the damn words. 
And it gets about 10 billion times worse when Zoe goes to Evan’s house alone, takes him up to his room, and sings “I don’t need reasons to want you” and that was the moment I was that person I hate in a movie theater and I pulled out my phone to Google who wrote the music and lyrics to the musical (we were in the back row of the theater no one was behind me THIS WAS AN OUTRAGE EMERGENCY) and of motherfucking course it was written by Benj Pasek and Justin Paul, 2 men who heard about meeting an actual human woman from a friend one time but otherwise are unfamiliar with the concept. 
Lastly, enormous serial killer vibes from Evan sending unlabeled flash drives anonymously through the mail with no note in an attempt to right his wrongs. That’s not catharsis, that’s how the next installment in the Saw franchise starts, with Evan in a Billy the clown doll mask showing up on the screen and asking if you want to play a fucking game. 
Also, I know it’s not possible for the narrative to justify this in a way that could be satisfying based on Evan’s actions, but what is with this thing where single working-class mom Julianne Moore is turning down rich people’s money for Evan to go to college? Like, obviously we can’t have that happen in the movie but in real life, fuck your pride! Take those rich people’s money!
I also know how movies work but nothing annoys me more than a giant group of high schoolers all getting beeps and boops to indicate text notifications all at the same time because I don’t know a single person under the age of 55 who keeps their ringer on. That shit is on vibrate AT MOST, and I feel like that’s a millennial thing. 
The emotional climax of the film is obviously Evan’s WAY TOO LATE confession, but the idea that it’s prompted by Connor’s family suddenly getting a lot of internet hate is, frankly, laughable. If Sandy Hook taught me one thing, it is that no tragedy is immune from trolls who live only to cause other people devastating emotional pain on the internet. That shit starts day 1. Apparently no one involved in this production has ever been on Twitter?
Also it feels like there should have been a dog somewhere in this movie and there was no dog, so points off for that too. 
Perhaps Dear Evan Hansen isn’t nearly as deep as it aspires to be. Perhaps it’s a morality play, a simplistic message of “Don’t lie, kids, lying is bad!” Major studio movies wrap themselves up with a nice bow at the end so everyone can feel good about themselves and leave with a happy ending, but the moronic cruelty on display here makes that feat feel impossible. We’re left with Evan in an orchard, reading Connor’s favorite books and staring into the big blue sky with all the self-actualization he’s earned now as a lil treat. And if Evan Hansen looked like an actual 18-year-old, it would be a lot easier to extend more empathy to him and his not-fully-developed prefrontal cortex, but it’s a little harder with this fully-grown, weathered man who was old enough to remember seeing Liar Liar in theaters. 
Dear Evan Hansen, 
Get some actual help and a haircut and maybe you can grow up enough to have an actual healthy interaction with any other living person, ever.
Sincerely, 
Me
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hey-hamlet · 3 years ago
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hamlet, hamlet i swear it's 2:45 here h o w will i be able to sleep. aside from that my brain had immediately two thoughts for your new au. 1: dptam x a pawns game (classics, really, though i wonder why exactly am would train mido, hm, maybe a sidekick (izuku has a knack for info gathering and analysing, doesn't he?) for himself or his actual successor?). 2: did oboro die cuz of nedzu? i wonder how the timetravelling babysitting would turn out... or w that richzawa that turned villain? hmm
I have done my job then!
1 - Don't praise the All Mighty's Game. This AU sees Nighteye still working at All Might's agency. Izuku, a quiet Gen Ed student Toshinori only recognises because the kid is quirkless and there was an instinctual solidarity/pity mixture there, comes up to 'Yagi Toshinori' and, with a stutter that does little to hide his steel, asks that he "pass this information off to Nighteye, please All Might!"
All Might is impressed, and does as the boy asks. 2 hours later he receives a nearly panicked call from his sidekick about how UA's principal is trying to topple the country and massacre its people and there is so little proof that they can't just take the man out without the HPSC coming down on them, along with horrified questions as to who gave him this information, how did they get it, are they safe?
All Might feels a mixture of horror and certainty grow in his chest. He's found his successor, but the boy's training will have to be worse than brutal - he's got maybe 3 months to become such a public figure Nezu can't risk killing him, and maybe 2 years to topple a nearly genocidal plot 2 decades in the making. Good thing All Might has never been above dirtying his hands for the greater good.
2. Yep. Nezu's whole thing with killing hero students is that for every hero who dies, exponentially more deaths will be caused by those they failed to save. Oboro was a stroke of genius on his part - AFO was fishing around for Aizawa, but the boy's quirk was too useful for Nezu's plans. Instead, he basically hands them Oboro on a silver platter, destroying a budding hero agency and propelling two powerful students towards a teaching track. Plus, he knew AFO would be able to work wonders with a quirk as versatile as Oboro's - he was right too. Kurogiri was a stroke of genius.
Sour Babysitters would see consistant efforts from Nezu to kill Izuku before he went back to his own time because it would nearly impossible to blame him for and attributed to the quirk used on him. Izuku would already be aware of his plan and, too used to not trusting anyone other than himself (and mayyybeee All Might) doesn't tell the trio, leading them to panic about how often Izuku gets himself into trouble.
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hops-hunny · 3 years ago
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Pride Lost, Feelings Found
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Pairing: Neville Longbottom x Reader
Pronouns: They/Them
Word Count: 2.2k
Request: @summerstardust  “Could you do a Neville with a gender neutral reader. It can fluff/smut/bit of both 🤷, whatever you want. With the prompts: 4. "You think she looks at me? Am I invisible?”, 12. "I’ve always liked you, you’ve just never noticed.” and 17. "Make me fall in love with you.”
Maybe where Neville is secretly crushing on the reader from afar and the reader is told, in some way, about this and he just runs away from the scene. Then the reader follows and finds him and tells him that they want to get to know him.
Don’t feel pressured to use this idea, though. I am just feeling a bit angsty at the moment. Thank you! :)”
Summary: It all crumbles down before Neville’s eyes, but it’s replaced with something he’d never expect.
Warnings: angst but it turns to fluff!!
A/N: Ok ok, if you want a part 2 with what happens after reader says that? Lmk and I’ll probably write it! I’m so sorry this took so long esp for one of my favorite readers. I hope you enjoy <3
4. "You think she looks at me? Am I invisible?” 
12. "I’ve always liked you, you’ve just never noticed.” 
17. "Make me fall in love with you.”
Sometimes Neville wish he had never noticed (Y/n). But when you shine as bright as they did, how couldn't you notice? They bewitching, enchanting everyone around them with a simple smile, him included. However when miracles as amazing as (Y/n) come to be, so does a lot of attention. He adored everything about them, the way they always smeared their ink on their scroll when they wrote, how they’d walk into class every morning with that same sleepy expression, even down to the way they’d always have to pull their socks up because they got the wrong size and they’d fall down. They was his dream partner. But sadly, that’s the thing about dream lovers, they’re meant to stay dreams.
From as long as Neville could remember, he had been on the bottom of the social ladder. Hell, when your familiar (who is also a toad) causes a wild goose chase during your first years at a new school, it’s really not hard to understand why. If it had been someone else instead of him, he would've made fun of them too. He was a loser and no one would ever let him forget. Not his friends, not Malfoy, not anyone. But they did. In all his years at Hogwarts, (Y/n) had never made him feel like a loser. Every interaction the two of them had made him feel normal, like himself.
Granted every interaction they had was small. Accidentally bumping into them in the halls, a tight lip smile when eye contact was made. One time he thought (Y/n) was waving to him but was in fact waving to their friend behind him but luckily they hadn't seen (Malfoy definitely did..). Out of all the people who could have noticed the way he looked at them or the way his cheeks would turn red when they'd pass him it had to be Malloy. That was awful for a multitude of reasons. One being that for some reason, (L/n) and Malfoy were the best of friends. Everyday he wished that it was him who got sat next to them in potions instead of that weasel of a boy. The second reason being that despite knowing how Neville felt for them, he still had yet to do anything with the information. To most people, they’d be relieved if Malfoy found out one of their most personal pieces of information and had yet to do anything but, Neville knew better. Draco was a vile creature and if he hadn’t teased him about it yet, that surely meant something even greater was coming. Something truly awful and devastating. 
The first week after Malfoy found out had Neville staying up to the break of dawn, stirring around restlessly at the thought of what he’d do. Would he spill something on him when he was set to have a class with them, tape a note to the back of his shirt with the information on it, or worse...no, no. Not even Malfoy was cruel enough to do that! If anything, if he was going to tell (Y/n) he’d probably do it when Neville wasn’t around so they could come up to him and reject him at random. Although it was sad, what got Neville to sleep at night was imagining that they already knew. That (Y/n) was more than aware and it was only a matter of time till they’d reject him and his life would go back to normal without any pesky thoughts of how beautiful he found them to be.
--------------------------------
Seamus’s words went in one of Neville’s ears and right back out of the other, sounding like white noise to the boy. He couldn’t listen to whatever idiotic thing he was going on about. How could he when (Y/n) was a few feet away, looking just as gorgeous as they usually did? It was hard not to focus on them, the way their pretty lips would curl into a smile, giggling at something one of their friends had said. He felt a smile grace his own lips at the sight, letting out a noise of protest as Ron chucked a cushion at his head.
“Are you even, listening Longbottom?” he heard him ask, still not ripping his eyes away from the (y/h/h) across the hall.
“You think they look at me? Am I invisible?” he asked in a hushed tone, as if he was to speak any louder, they would somehow hear them despite them being so far away. Seamus let out a loud snort, beginning to cackle as he slapped the boy on the back a bit too hard.
“Fat chance, Longbottom! You think (L/n) would notice you? They wouldn’t even notice me, and that’s saying something!” Seamus wheezed out. Neville shot him a pointed glare, fuming from the boy’s words. He shoved him off the couch, rolling his eyes.
“It’s not that people don’t notice you Seamus….it’s that they do for all the wrong reasons.” Dean pointed out, causing the other 3 to laugh, growing louder as Seamus failed to push himself off the ground. 
“Oh don’t worry, Longbottom. (L/n) will be sure to notice you soon enough.” he froze at the sound of the cold voice, turning around to look at the platinum blonde prince himself. Draco stood their, smirking. Crabbe and Goyle tried to nod along when in reality, they had no idea what their leader was going on about. Neville gulped, standing up to face him completely.
“W-what do you mean?” he asked him, wiping his sweaty palms on his pants. Draco simply shrugged, beginning to walk in the opposite direction. He turned around briefly looking the boy up and down.
“Means exactly what I said. Nothing more, nothing less. Well as much as I’d love to stay around and lose brain cells with you idiots, I’ve got better things to attend to.” and with that he left.
“Don’t worry, Nev. Draco is always just talk, I’m sure nothing will come of it.” Harry said, offering the boy a reassuring smile. Although Neville knew he meant well, he couldn’t stop the sinking, tight feeling in his chest. Draco had yet to do something so he had no reason to feel this way, but it was just a hunch that the worst was yet to come.
Even hours later, as Neville lay in his bed that night, all he could think about were the words that echoed throughout his head over and over.
“Oh don’t worry, Longbottom. (L/n) will be sure to notice you soon enough.”
He didn’t know if he was grateful for how vague that was or if it was the bane of his days. Draco could’ve meant anything by that, all he knew is whatever it meant the intent behind his words were less than kind. He turned again, sighing as he looked out the window. There was a full moon tonight, a beautiful silver halo of light dancing its way around it. 
“Merlin, save me please.” he pleaded quietly, to no one in particular. Every bit of hope, every positive thought laced in his words. Although he prepared for the worse to happen, he had a sliver of hope that it wouldn’t. That tomorrow he’d wake up and his day would be as mundane as usual, just the way he’d like it. And if he was lucky (Y/n) would give him a small smile in the hall.
---------------------------
Neville’s small sliver of hope had grown into an entire cake. Looking back on earlier in the week, he was worried for absolutely nothing! Malfoy once again was all bark and no bite which for once, he was glad for! He let out a sigh of content as he made his way from the library, heading in the direction of the main corridor. He saw Seamus give him an uncharacteristically serious look from the small crowd that was gathered around something. As he grew closer, in the middle of the circle he saw Draco stood on a crate as (Y/n) sat next to him, listening as he read something from a paper. 
“Nev, you might wanna...might wanna leave.” Seamus whispered to him. However, he looked as people stared at him, some giggling while some look sympathetic.
“Why? What’s going o-”
“Here’s another one I found in his bin! ‘Dear (Y/n), although I’ll never give you this letter, I can’t help but write about how amazing you are! When I saw you help that injured bird the other day, I wanted nothing more than to help you tend to it. I find it funny how even when you’re sad, you manage to brighten up my day.’ God how dorky is this loser? I can’t believe he fancies you so much (Y/n)!” Draco howled in laughter, a few others joining him. Neville found himself at the forefront of the circle, frozen in his spot. That was his letter! He had started writing them as a way of coping with his feelings, knowing that the person he fancied would always be out of reach of him. “Anything to say for yourself, Longbottom?”
Neville felt tears well in his eyes, the warmth of them mixing with the heat of his red flushed face. “I...I..” he looked at (Y/n) who look like they had something to say however, he didn’t wanna stick around to hear it. Without another word, he ran off, tears streaming down his face as soon as he was far enough from anyone. In his time of despair, he ran to his only place of comfort. The one place that he wasn’t Neville, the loser who just had his feelings ripped from safe keeping in front of half the students in his year. The place where he was just Neville.
He took in a deep breath of the familiar muggy air of the greenhouse, relaxing slightly as he took a seat on the ground. “God I’m so stupid!” he wailed, tears flowing down his face. His crying grew harder, harsh hiccups shaking and jolting his body as he screamed into his knees. He knew there was a matter of time before (Y/n) was to find out, he just didn’t know it’d be like this. If this was just the pain from them learning about his feelings, he didn’t wanna know how bad he’d be wounded when they came to reject him. Neville’s head jolted up at the sound of soft footsteps making their way over to him. He noticed the familiar pair of black shoes, turning his head as they kneeled down in front of him.
“I thought you may be here! You always seemed so passionate about plants during herbology so I thought it wouldn’t hurt to check here first.” (Y/n) said, placing a hand on the boy’s knee. He looked down at where they connected, feeling his face flush slightly from the contact. “You know, your friends care about you a lot. After you ran off, Ginny came up and socked Draco straight in the face. It was quite a sight really.” they let out a soft giggle at the memory. “Hermione went in to drag her off but when she saw how smug Draco looked, she couldn’t help but to join in. While they did that, your other friends set off looking for you and I did too.”
“Why?” he asked, catching their attention. The (y/h/h) gave him a confused look, tilting their head to the side. “Why did you come looking for me? Don’t you hate me now? Gross, stupid Longbottom having a crush on Hogwart’s sweetheart. How pathetic, huh?” he sniffled, ripping his eyes away from them. He knew if he was to continue to look, a completely new set of tears would be triggered.
“Why wouldn’t I? I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t! Although I don’t know much about you, I do know you’re a kind individual and you didn’t deserve what Draco did to you.” they said in a soft tone, moving into the spot next to Neville. They sat in silence for a moment before (Y/n) cleared their throat, looking over at him once more. “How long?”
“Pardon?”
“I mean, how long have you liked me for? I wasn’t even aware until today.” they queried curiously.
“I’ve always liked you, you’ve just never noticed. I don’t blame you for not noticing though, we’re from two different worlds. You’ve got everyone in hogwarts begging for a moment of your time and you hang out with some of the most elite and prestigious people in the castle.” he sniffled some, wiping his nose on his sleeve as he set his hand down on the cold cement ground. “It was stupid of me to let my feelings last for so long.”
“Why was it stupid?” they asked, scooting closer to him. Neville turned to look at them, losing his breath at their closeness.
“Because you don’t feel the same..not that I expected you to. You didn’t even know I existed until today.” he let out a huff of air. (Y/n) bit the inside of their cheek before placing their hand on top of Neville’s, tangling their fingers together.
“You’re right, I don’t feel the same,” they started, tightening their grip as the boy began to get up. “But that doesn’t mean I never will. Let’s get to know each other a bit more.” they leaned in closer, the feeling of both of their breath being exchanged like whispers amongst their lips. 
“Make me fall in love with you.”
TAGSLIST:@vayeya11 @pink-hufflepuff  @clancyscookies @beewitchedlou​ 
@nevillelongbottomsgirlfriend​ @redpanda-poetry​ @vibingaesthetically​
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cloud9in · 3 years ago
Note
You’re the only one who’s writing poppy x mc fics sooo, i have a request “ bea is a bad girl (like in a gang) in high school and also went jail couple of times for getting in trouble in high school senior year poppy was new transfer student and after 2 months bea join back school and met poppy bea and they just click yk like a connection slowly they started dating and in school everyone was shocked to see bea in a relationship ( bad girl and new girl) poppy is always worried about bea and few days before graduation bea got hurt really bad and poppy gives bea 2 options that she has to choose between her or her this (gang).. bea didn’t say anything to her so poppy left, after 2/3 years they met in college bea was a different person but so does poppy they become enemies (no one knows why they hate each other) one day they were arguing and poppy shout at her and says why you're back and bea put her hand on her cheek and smile and say i am here to win you back because i love you 😬
Promises (Poppy x MC)
Part 1/?
Can i just say I'm absolutely invested in this plot? You've got me hooked on my own story, as hectic as my life is, this is enjoyable to write. I hope you like it as well @iamsimpforpoppy
Word count: 1.8k (i got carried away)
“You know what to do Jackson, same old shit.”
“Yeah but it feels like a movie every damn time”, Bea responds confidently as she unbuckles her seatbelt. She sports a black mask with a yellow bandana, a vivacious color worn by only the Southside Spades, a notorious street gang who were known for robbery, and occasional blood.
Bea found herself wrapped up in the world of gangs when she turned sixteen. But before that the brunette would assist in transporting goods, also known as hardcore drugs. There was plenty enough to go around so Bea could indulge in any she wanted. Drugs didn’t give her the high she craved though, instead it was the thrilling game of cat and mouse with the cops.
Every now and then she’d get thrown in the slammer overnight. But this particular evening earns her one year in the NY State Penitentiary. See, the cops never gathered significant evidence to build a case against her, even though she was well aware of Detective Steinhelm who had some sick obsession with her. Following her everywhere, until Bea confronted her directly after noticing the same black sedan parked a street down from her house.
But she played the game right, and nothing ever led back to her. Until now.
“Where’s the money Bradley? I feel like I’ve been kissing your ass all week, the boss needs it now.”
A skinny blonde boy who looks like he had better days grunts in annoyance, “You’ll get your money...I’m just a little short right now.”
“Time’s up Ken doll, you know Carter will have your head for this.”
“Maybe he doesn’t have to know. Maybe this can be between us…”, Bradley strides carefully towards the blonde, a disturbing grin on his face which screams junkie. “Back the hell up now.”
Bea pulled her knife out with ease and pointed it towards him. She didn’t plan on actually using it. Murder was way out her budget for a simple money pickup but she knew that it would scare the boy easily. Except he kicked the blade out of her hold which prompted it to screech across the concrete before coming to a stop. Before Bea could think her fists reacted as she intercepted a punch that aimed straight for her jaw. She twists Bradley’s arm and he falls on his knees in pain. With his back to her, she kicks him down until he’s flat on his stomach.
“What is it exactly that you plan on doing now Bradley?” The blonde boy struggles under Bea’s foot but manages to reach around and slash at her ankle with a surprise shiv. Bea yelps in pain before kicking his head, rendering him unconscious.
“Stupid idiot. Had to make this harder than it should’ve been.”
Bea eventually finds the stash of money hidden under his mattress, an amateur hiding place at best. She congratulated herself for another job accomplished (kinda) and headed home. What the seventeen year old didn’t expect was the repulsive sound of a siren filling her ears as she stepped out onto her driveway. Her blood rushed to her head when she spotted Detective Steinhelm among the police officers surrounding her and retorts, “oh come on. I thought I told them about you harassing me. What do you want? Back here to strip search me again?”
The older woman only watches the blonde in eerie silence before smiling and gesturing to a police officer. “Beatriz Jackson you have the right to remain silent, anything you say or do can be used against you in a court of law-”
“What the actual fuck!” Bea yanks her arms out of the officers reach which initiates a struggle for dominance. This was nothing new to her, but it still felt sickening. Like she was some pet.
“You have the right to have a lawyer present during any questioning. If you cannot afford a lawyer, one will be appointed for you if you so desire.” Detective Steinhelm finishes speaking and approaches the still scuffling blonde, “if you keep resisting I will tase you myself.”
Bea bites back the urge to headbutt the old hag right in her stupid face but she didn’t need any extra charges, for whatever the hell it was she was being charged for.
“Tell me why the fuck I am being arrested and I’ll calm down.”
That’s when Bea notices a familiar (bruised up) face from earlier. His smirk was enough to eat at her skin and she felt burning hot rage.
“Your blood was found at the scene of Mr. Denbroughs assault. You are being arrested in the case of second degree assault with intent to hurt someone with a deadly weapon.”
***
Bea only got one year in prison due to her kickass lawyer Ina Kingsley who played the minor card at every opportunity given. She also pointed out the fact that the knife wasn’t bloodstained, and Bradley never had any stab wounds so there is no proof the weapon was ever used against him. And it technically wasn’t. Good thing she didn’t bring a gun instead.
She did miss her 18th birthday though. And a few months of her senior year. But that’s what summer classes were for right?
All eyes were on the blonde when she returned, and whispers spread throughout the school about a certain new girl. Bea paid no mind to the fingers that pointed in her direction but the newcomer did manage to catch her attention, and pretty quick at that.
“Hey Jackson, how was solitary confinement?”
“I heard they make you use the bathroom right through the tiny food slot.”
Bea rolls her eyes and pelts a piece of not-so-fresh bread right at Ford’s head. The other people at the table join in on the laughter and Bea shakes her head and smiles, “it was Juvie you dumbass, and they made us sit in a circle together every Thursday like we were in an AA meeting.
“That’s jail for babies, goldilocks here wouldn’t last a minute in a real prison”, Carter joins them at the table with a cocky smirk, yet his eyes soften when landing on Bea. She shares a similar look with him knowing they’ll have a real conversation later. Because they definitely didn’t get to have that when Bea was getting dragged away to the police station in cuffs, and every event after that.
“It’s our girl’s first day out, we have to celebrate. And it’s not like she’s on probation...right Bea?”
“I do have a curfew, and I’m on juvenile probation so…when we partying?” The crew laughs as Bea shrugs. Her mother will deal with it. Zoey scoots in next to the blonde and wraps her arm around her shoulder in a side hug. “So glad to have you back Bea, and we are not risking you breaking parole so let’s just go to a sport’s bar tonight.”
Bea nods her head in agreement as the first warning bell goes off and everyone starts to clean up. Zoey taps on her arm and points towards one of the farther tables where a lone figure sits, wiping her hands with a napkin. All Bea saw were blonde tresses until she turned and they made brief eye contact.
“She’s the new girl, Poppy Min Sinclair. Rumor is she’s got a rich white daddy. You should totally invite her to the party.”
“And why would I do that?”
Zoey squints her eyes and leans in closer, her hands under chin in thought, “she seems like the broody type, you two would click.” She laughs at Bea’s comical expression but the blonde can’t bother to look in her direction, she’s way too wrapped up in what little the stranger a few tables away had to offer. She would sit on that thought, Bea was not one to shy away from anything.
***
The two became friends quicker than anyone could think.
One day after school, Poppy’s car wouldn’t start. It just didn’t comply. You would think she’d be poised and call her mechanic to come fix it, but instead the blonde slumped against the driver’s side window and let out a visibly frustrated, high-pitched yelp. Bea watched her pace around the car and even...kick?...the front bumper with her heels in efforts to wake it up.
“You know I may be wrong but I think that only makes it worse..” She approaches the helpless blonde with a small grin. Poppy’s persistence amazed her though, she’s never seen anyone determined to beat a car up. An expensive one at that.
“I hope you have some idea how to fix it, unless you’re here to waste my time and ask me on a date.”
Woah.
Okay that definitely threw Bea on a whim. She lets out a sharp laugh and bites her lips in amusement. She strolls towards the front of her car, holding Poppy’s gaze the whole way. She liked that the blonde didn’t avert her eyes. “And if I did? We couldn’t take your car of course, it’s obviously impaired.”
Poppy smiles and turns to look at Bea properly. She checks out every inch of her with no visible shame. An assessment so to say, and she likes what she sees.
“It’s your lucky day Poppy, I happen to know a thing or three about cars, and I desperately want to get this thing working so we can go on that date.” She winks playfully but god does she mean it. Bea silently prayed that the blonde wouldn’t take it the wrong way, but she knew she won when Poppy didn't protest, instead getting comfortable under some shade and holding her hand out, “the stage is all yours Jackson.”
***
“So what you’re trying to tell me is that I can’t jump over this obvious not-so-protected fence?”
“Judging by the sign right next to it that says...oh wow who would’ve thought, “DO NOT ENTER”, I don’t think so”, Poppy deadpans. It didn’t phase Bea of course because she was already halfway up the fence when the blonde turned away from the sign. The girl had a point to prove, maybe not a valid one, but still a point.
Poppy pinches her eyebrows in exasperation before looking back up to a nonchalant Bea swinging her legs from the top of the fence. She winks down at the blonde, “join me?”
Poppy didn’t expect to be climbing fences with a charismatic girl who had the same color hair as her when she moved schools, but she found herself embracing every moment of it. Although the trip up there was a struggle and some.
“I swear to god there’s a wire in my ass.”
“You’re being dramatic.”
“And we’re both going to end up in the hospital. Get. me. Down.”
Bea tries to hold in her laughter the whole way down but lets it loose when she sees Poppy still up there, partly hovering in the air. “Pops...I’ll catch you, don't worry. Climb down slowly.” She doesn’t. But Bea had her feet planted and ready because any moment with the sassy blonde was unpredictable.  And she loved it. Especially because she had Poppy engulfed in her arms and they were so close their noses touched.
Bea promised herself she’d kiss the girl next time.
***
“You’re...in a gang?”
Bea felt a clasp of cold air enter her lungs as she stared ahead. It wasn’t like she could hide it from Poppy. She has a reputation, and word has gotten around about the two getting close. This was just like that one time at the end of sophomore year where Bea met Kelly Hall, a beautiful girl with golden rimmed glasses. Unfortunately she only could imagine what could’ve been after whispers ended up right on the doorstep of Kelly’s parents, and she suddenly changed her number, and switched out of every class she had with Bea.
The blonde didn’t want to entertain the thought of Poppy doing the same, but this was a lifestyle she chose.
“I mean...how?”
Bea sighs and turns to look at her, “I fell into the wrong crowd. Or maybe it’s the right one because I never found a true home until I met them. They’re family, I wouldn’t expect you to get it though and I understand if you want to distance-”
“I of all people know what it’s like to not fit in Jackson. You’ve found people who make you feel safe. Maybe I don’t agree with the troubles that come with being in a gang but I don’t know the whole story.”
“Do you want to?”
Poppy wraps her arms around Bea’s and lays her head on her shoulder, “I want to know that you won’t get yourself hurt but I know that’s nearly impossible.”
Bea exhales slowly, not knowing what to say. She knew that this would upset Poppy but her acceptance meant more. She didn’t know what this would mean for the two of them, if there was a “them”, but she felt more encouraged to share more of her other life with the blonde.
“Just promise me one thing Jackson.”
“Yeah?”
Poppy’s voice comes out softer than expected, and Bea ingests every emotion that comes with it, “Promise me you won’t ever put yourself in a position where you have to choose between me or the gang.”
Bea finds her hand in the space where their thighs touched and latches onto it like a lifebuoy,
“I promise.”
***
“I just remembered something Poppy.”
“What, that you have half a brain cell? I thought that was established Jackson.”
Bea launches a pillow that (purposely) misses Poppy’s head by an inch. If she actually hit her and frizzed up her locks then she’d never hear, or see..or walk again.
“I’m being serious. I just remembered this too, we never went on that car date we talked about.”
Poppy squints her eyes in confusion, but was fully aware of what Bea was referring to. “You mean the first time we met?”
The blonde smiles to herself as she replayed that day in her head over and over again. She couldn’t decide if Bea’s openly flirty behavior is what drew her in or if it was her ability to fix any of her possessions with ease. And for free.
Bea pulls Poppy up by her hands until her back is against the lockers. Another perfect opportunity for the blonde to make do of that promise she made to herself, but something told her to wait just a bit longer. “So what do you say? Poppy Min Sinclair, will you go on a date with me?”
Poppy rolls her eyes playfully, pulling Bea in closer by the collar of her letterman, “now who’s being dramatic?”
“I didn’t hear a no”
“I think you know what the answer is.”
That night Zoey helped Bea prep for her first date with the girl that she could say she was almost in love with. The taller girl brushed some dust off of Bea’s jacket and planted her hands on her shoulders, “remember Jackson, give her the ride of her life. And I mean that in every way possible.”
Thanks Zoe.
Bea watched Poppy drive up in front of her house and something inside her mind couldn’t deny the pang her heart let out when she saw Poppy smile the way she did.
Bea took control of the driving and told Poppy to recline her seat and enjoy the ride, with her seatbelt on of course. Safe sacrifices. They cruised through an empty highway blasting Poppy’s spotify playlist named “Rich Bitch Songs” because that was their ideal perfect date. It’s amazing that the two could even come to an agreement, but here we are.
She watched the beautiful blonde sing her lungs out and couldn’t help but mirror her joy, taking her hands off the steering wheel. The pump of adrenaline prompts a new excitement in the air and Poppy wraps Bea into a secure hug, her hair flying wildly with the wind. Bea slows the car down but the rapid beating of her heart made it seem they were going 100 miles per second.
“I feel so alive Jackson.”
Bea stared at the girl in the passenger seat with a look that could only be described as love.
“You make me feel alive.”
Poppy kept talking and Bea found a way to focus on both the road and the blonde next to her. Because when you truly enjoy something, you’ll find a way to keep experiencing it. And Bea enjoyed hearing Poppy’s voice, she loved everything about her.
“I feel like kissing you.”
“Then what’s stopping you?”
“...Nothing. I should’ve done this a long time ago.”
They kiss when Bea pulls over.  A hot feeling consumes them like fire when their tongues collide and Bea plants her hands around Poppy’s hips, pushing her back into her seat until she’s on top. The windows easily start to fog up in reaction to the heat, and not once did they take their hands off each other.
Promise 1/2 kept
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End Note: This chapter was to build their relationship, more angst incoming. BIG THANKS to @somewillwin for letting me use Jackson <3333
Taglist: @samanthadalton @somewillwin @clowneryme @baexpoppy @poppysmc @doey-eyes8 @veenast @straightlikewetspaghetti @phoennixxsblog @a-ghost-girl
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harrysweasleys · 4 years ago
Text
to find each other // g.w
summary: Hi love I was wondering if I could request a george x reader. I like the whole like when you're angry or anything write to the person but never send it but one day George finds the love letter. And reader is all embarased and runs away before he can tell her he like her so he writes her a love letter. (Also I'm aware this is a george ask but in my mind fred didnt die. I'm also imagining this before the battle but fred still doesnt die). If this doesnt spark anything that totally fine. Thanks
warnings: mentions of war, blood and death (relax, it aint fredward)
word count: 4.4k 
a/n: this request was so cute and i enjoyed writing this so much! also i hope you don’t mind that i changed up the time that it takes place just a tad. also i want a love letter from george, thanks. 
[i do not give permission for my work to be reposted to any other platform.]
———————————————————————
No amount of window shopping could hide the anxious bubbling in your stomach. Diagon Alley, though usually one of your favourite places, was currently the cause of your shaky fingers and heavy breathing. It was the last day of summer holidays, and for the countless students returning to Hogwarts, it meant a place to get away from home, a place that they could escape to to get away from the chaos of the real world.
However, for you, it meant that things would get messy. That the raging war that was brewing in the evil corners of the Wizarding World was bound to strike. And strike hard. 
Dangers lurked around every corner and even the comforting atmosphere of Diagon Alley was no longer a place you wanted to be. Countless shops were boarded shut, their windows shattered to pieces as if an attack had taken place. Which was most likely the case, if you were being honest.
The only store that seemed to be alive also happened to be the one that you wanted to avoid at all costs. The large purple and orange shop stood practically glowing in the middle of the gloomy alley, music and laughter echoing from the inside. You had to give credit where credit was due; the shop owners were brilliant. 
Students piled in and out in dozens — you couldn’t blame them. Fred and George had a knack for making people laugh. And right now, people needed laughs more than ever. You couldn’t blame these young students for stocking up on joke products to keep themselves entertained for the year. Especially since everyone was well aware this may be the last year of ‘normalcy’ that they get.
However, the shop seemed to be doing marvellously. You’d go in to say hi if it wouldn’t crush your entire existence to do so. Slightly dramatic, but true. You hadn’t left things off on a good foot with George, and the last thing you wanted to do was go in there and make things awkward. After all, maybe he had moved on. 
The last time you saw him, he held your crumpled note in his hand, his broom in the other, and a proud smile on his face as he waved goodbye to the school behind him. The school in which you two shared some of your best moments, the inside jokes and the late nights giggling into pillows in the dark of the common room. 
Until the note. 
The one you had written him the night you found out he was leaving. The one with tear drop stains and smudged ink — the one that confessed your long-rooted love for the ginger boy that had stolen your heart the first day you met him. 
He had found it himself, actually. It wasn’t “given to him,” per say. He had snuck into the girl’s dorm — how, you still have no clue — and found you crying on your lumpy four-poster, your hair a disheveled mess and your cheeks bright red from sobbing. You had been furious at him. Not because you were mad, but because you’d miss him. Miss his smile, the way he brought light to every boring class, and you’d miss the way he made you feel like home, even though your home home was miles and miles away. 
He’d found the messy parchment scrunched up on your dresser and picked it up at the sight of his name. He didn’t let you take it away from him, so you made him promise he’d read it after he was long gone from school. So that you could be saved from the embarrassment of him not feeling the same. The last thing you wanted was to have to sit through the last few months of school with your best friend hating your guts for the unfortunate feelings you had developed.
You thought you were way over him by now, but looking up into the glorious glass windows of his store, you were hit with a wave of nausea. Not because you didn’t  want to see him, but because you wanted to see him so badly it was sickening. To be fair, it had only really been two years, but still. Had he missed you? Had he sat there every night, clutching your wrinkled love letter and thinking back to the moments you two shared? 
You shook your head and walked past the shop, trying your best not to peer in through the windows and catch sight of the familiar grinning man. He somehow always had a smile on his face and that was something you could really appreciate, especially right now. Nothing ever seemed to bring him down and that was one of the things you appreciated most. 
———————————————————————
“What’re you grinning at, Weasley?” you asked, a smile on your own lips as you gave George a teasing look, your hands running through his hair as he sat on the ground between your legs, eyes focused on the common room fire that was slowly burning down to embers.
“Nothing,” he replied, “Just… taking it all in.”
Gryffindor had won the House Cup just that evening, along with the Quidditch Cup just a few days before. You supposed George did actually have quite a bit to smile about, but as he sat there, his eyes slightly dazed and a lazy grin on his lips, something told you it actually had to do with something else.
“Right,” you replied, taking your hands out of his soft hair and leaning back on the couch, “Because I totally believe you.”
He turned around, his smile never faltering, “What? You’re gonna give me a hard time for being in a good mood? C’mon, let me live, woman.”
You tossed your head back, cheeks flushed, “Fine. The day you don’t have a smile on your face is the day I’ll know something’s wrong, yeah?”
Sitting up and crashing next to you on the couch, he gave you quite the exaggerated nod before dropping it and gazing softly into your eyes, “Around you, how can anything ever be wrong?”
———————————————————————
Popping in and out of stores seemed to be the best distraction — Quidditch Supplies, Pets, Quills, the best Parchment in town — all stores that you remember running in and out of while you were just a wee child, hoping to buy the top quality items for another long year at school. 
You’d been so distracted by the sound of children laughing and charging by you that you barely registered the fact that you had walked into a tall body. Luckily, your balance hadn’t been knocked over, but you had been walking at such a quick pace that you’re surprised the other person didn’t go falling backwards.
“Sorry,” you mumbled, looking up and catching your step, nearly losing it completely as your eyes caught sight of the person in front of you. 
Eyes still golden like the sun, George Weasley hadn’t changed. His hair was slightly longer and he wore nicer clothing — perks of running your own business — but he hadn’t changed a day. His lips were still a deep pink, and the freckles on his cheek seemed to be more prominent than you remember. 
“Y/N?” the corners of his lips turned up into a smile, “Bloody hell, what are you doing here?”
You stared up, mind completely blank, “Oh — It’s — I’ve gotta go.”
His hand shot out to grab your wrist, his fingers leaving a touch of sparks in their wake. You snapped it away, rubbing over the skin to soothe the electrifying touch that George left behind. Even years later, he still had that effect on you, and you wished more than anything that you could curse him out for it.
“Y/N, blimey, wait, let’s catch up,” he shrugged, eyes pleading, “What’re you running from? We were best friends. I’ve missed you. It’s been two bloody years, woman.”
“You know damn well why that changed,” you grumbled, trying your best to look anywhere but his inviting eyes. You knew that if you made eye contact, you’d be sucked right back into whatever hold he had on you while you were in school. You weren’t sure you could deal with that right about now.
He sighed, running a hand through his hair, “Look, Y/N, please. Just stay for a few minutes. Come see the shop, yeah? Reckon Fred’ll be thrilled to see you.”
You gave in and looked up at him, already knowing you wouldn’t be able to say no. He was right, you guys were best friends. You were inseparable. They always say catching feelings for your best friend is a beautiful thing, but in your case it felt like the worst thing to happen. You fell head over heels for George and he had no clue. He continued living his life, continued doing the things he loved, and then he left.
You only hoped the letter kept him up at night. As petty as that was.
“Fine,” you let out a deep breath, “Just a few minutes.”
You nearly missed the wide grin that spread across his face, showcasing the beautiful smile that still managed to leave your chest in a fluttery mess. You internally scolded yourself — you weren’t over your feelings and chances are this was going to make things worse.
The shop was magnificent. Shelves lined the walls as far as the eye could see. And even though Diagon Alley was nearly deserted, the shop seemed to be thriving — not that you were surprised. Kids and young adults huddled in groups to gawk and stare at the latest products, eyeing everything with keen interest as George’s twin, Fred, explained to them how things worked. 
“You did good,” you smiled up at George, all hostility towards him fading as the bubbly atmosphere of the shop engulfed you, making you feel as if you were transported back to your childhood, “I’m proud of you guys.” 
“Blimey,” George grinned, placing his hand on your shoulder, “Didn’t think I’d ever hear you say that.”
Your smile faded and you turned away from him, cheeks burning at his comment.
“I didn’t mean it like that,” he spun you back around to face him, “I just meant because it’s been so long since I’ve seen you. Wasn’t sure I’d ever see you again, to be honest.”
You bit your lip, nodding slowly, “I know. I’m sorry. It was just so hard to work up the courage to see you.”
You weren’t exactly lying. After what happened, you couldn’t find it in yourself to face him. But that wasn’t the whole truth, really. Your courage and confidence had left with him, there was no way you’d be able to come here and see him happy with someone else. Someone that wasn’t you.
“I actually have something for you,” he held his finger up and rushed out of sight, up the stairs and through a door. You stood awkwardly, debating whether you should just turn around and walk out of the store and into the city. He’d never be able to track you down. But, somehow, you couldn’t bring yourself to move your feet. You were grounded in the moment, still gazing at all the trinkets and items around you. 
Some made noise, some were brightly coloured — some of them even looked like that evil witch Headmistress Umbridge. You stifled a laugh, remembering the times you and the twins had narrowly escaped her wicked grasp. She was not one for fun, that was certain.
———————————————————————
“Down here!” you called, grabbing George’s hand and running down another dark corridor, Filch’s footsteps still echoing behind the two of you.
“When I catch ya, you’ll be expelled!” his grimy voice reached your ears, sending you into another fit of giggles as you linked your fingers with George’s, the two of you barreling down the stairs and continuing your run up to the Gryffindor tower. You had to admit, it was quite far, but if you kept up this speed, Filch and his limp wouldn’t be able to catch up.
“Wait, there’s a prefect,” George whispered through his heavy breathing, giving your hand a heavy tug and pulling you behind a pillar.
Your body fell against his, the two of you squished in a tiny space as you heard the distant voice of the Ravenclaw prefect approaching your hiding spot. George’s breathing was heavy, his chest rubbing against yours with each inhale he took. Your breathing would be heavy if you weren’t having heart palpitations, his body so close to yours you couldn’t think straight.
“Reckon that’s another narrow escape,” he chuckled, breath fanning your face. You couldn’t bring yourself to make eye contact, way too caught off guard to properly process his words.
Did he realize what this did to you? This closeness, this intimacy? 
It was undoubtedly true — you were falling for your best friend.
———————————————————————
“Well, if it isn’t Y/N Y/L/N,” Fred sauntered over, hands in his pockets and a bright grin on his face, “What brings you to our little corner of the wizarding world?”
He brought his arms out for an embrace; one that you gladly accepted. He was warm and familiar, and you felt a grin spread across your face. 
“It’s nice to see you, Freddie,” you pulled away, “You guys have really blown me away with all of this.”
“Well, what can I say?” he shrugged, tips of his ears turning slightly pink, “We’ve clearly got a knack for entrepreneurship.” 
You shook your head, laughter bubbling in your chest. You always knew they’d be successful — hell, you told them a million times — but seeing it in person after all these years of shutting yourself away, it sort of felt like a dream. As if you’d missed quite possibly the biggest event of their lives.
And you felt like a horrible friend.
“Sorry I wasn’t more supportive,” you said softly, “I really am impressed.”
He lifted his hand and ruffled your hair, “Don’t be so hard on yourself. We knew you always had your full support.”
Before you could respond, George came rushing back down the stairs. You were rather thankful for it, as your conversation with Fred was causing your emotions to come through. You could feel your throat closing in and the familiar sting of tears in your eyes, but George’s presence caused your feelings to shift.
He nudged his brother away and stood in front of you, an envelope in hand. On the front of it, your name was scribbled in swirly handwriting — George’s, you recognized — and you could see the faint outline of parchment inside it.
“What’s this?” you asked, taking the envelope from his hands as he shoved it in your direction, his cheeks a tad pinker than before. 
He let out a deep breath, “You’ll see when you open it.”
You nodded, placing the envelope gently into your purse, “I’ll open it when I’m home.”
“Okay,” he responded instantly, shoving his hands into his pockets. You knew it was a nervous habit of his, and it raised a question as to what could possibly be in that envelope that had him so on edge.
“I’ve, uh, I’ve gotta get going,” you said, your voice barely audible. But by the way George’s shoulders slouched, you knew he heard you. He took his hands out of his pockets and pulled you in for a hug. 
Without thinking, you wrapped your arms tightly around him, resting your head on his shoulder and taking in a deep breath. He smelled the same as he did all those years ago, and although he was the same height, he also definitely felt a lot stronger. 
Lifting boxes on a daily basis has taken its toll.
You couldn’t count how many hugs you’d shared with George during your time at Hogwarts, but something about this hug felt different. It felt final, conclusive. As if you both knew that this would be the final time you’d get to see each other. 
“I’ve missed you,” he said, mouth mere inches from your ear.
“I’ve missed you too,” you replied right away, pulling your body away from his to look into his eyes. You tried your best to force a smile, but it most likely only came off as a grimace. After all, you couldn’t find anything to feel enthusiastic about in the moment.
You leaned up and pressed a kiss to his warm cheek, letting your hand linger on his arm for a second longer than intended, before pulling away and leaving the store without another word.
It was safe, and very unfortunate, to say your feelings were still very much present.
———————————————————————
You stared down at the paper, stunned. It was possibly your seventh time reading it and you still couldn’t believe it.
After all these years, he felt the same. 
George Weasley felt the same.
You lifted the letter, once again preparing yourself to read it, wiping your eyes with an already soaked tissue.
Y/N,
I don’t know much about writing letters with a romantic goal, but I do know that I couldn’t leave yours unanswered. There were too many things left in the air, and I might never even get to give this to you, but it’s worth writing anyways.
I remember the first day we met. Do you remember? We were in second year and you fell down the stairs onto Freddie. You were so cute, and so flustered. It was nearly immediately after that that we became friends, if I remember correctly. (Which I always do.)
Skip forward a few years and you practically owned my heart and soul. I barely went a moment without thinking of you. Of your smile, of your laugh, of your hair and your face. You know, I did it on purpose. All the jokes, they were for you. To make you laugh. Bloody cliche, I know. But that’s the truth, love.
When I left school, it was hard. Not because I’d have to start a whole new life, but because I’d have to start that life without you. Without your constant positivity and your radiance. It was nearly impossible, but you were so proud. So proud of Freddie and me that I knew I couldn’t let you down.
But I did. I left you there, in that horrid place with that toad woman. And I regret that to this day. I read your note every day. I still do. It’s the only thing of yours that I have in my life and I cherish it more than you know.
So, this note kind of has no purpose, but it does have a point. The point is that I love you too. That I’ve loved you for a long time, and chances are that I always will. You’re the best part of me and that’ll never change.
Please take care. And I hope we get to find each other.
Yours forever,
George.
You read it again, and again, and again, and could barely process the words on the tattered parchment. It was a pretty neat piece, which indicated that there was no way he wrote two years ago. It had to be recent — within the last year. And the fact that he decided to give it to you now meant that he might even still feel this way.
With the amount of times you envisioned George professing his undying love to you, not once did you think it would be in these circumstances. With the two of you living different lives. 
You went to bed that night, the note tucked under your pillow. You couldn’t part with it. Even though you had no clue what to do about said note, you didn’t want to let go of it. It was true, and all these years later you finally realized it. All the shared touches, the laughs, the smiles across classrooms; it all made sense. Not only were you falling hopelessly in love with your best friend, but he was doing the exact same thing.
And I hope we get to find each other.
If that meant what you thought — what you hoped — it meant, then maybe there was a chance for you. But for that chance to happen, you had a lot that you needed to sort out. What would this mean? Would you two start from scratch?
You hadn’t exactly had any sort of relationship over the past two years, how would you just jump into something like this? Maybe him giving you the letter was his form of closure, his way of telling you that maybe it could have happened, but now there’s no chance.
You didn’t want to dwell, but there was no way you couldn’t. How does one let something like this go? You can’t. You can’t go back to living a normal life with this knowledge hanging over your head.
He loved you.
If only there was a way you could talk to him, clear the air. Maybe he did still feel the same.
———————————————————————
Hogwarts was, to put it kindly, in the middle of chaos. Spells of bright green and red shot out from every which direction, hitting columns and occasionally, other bodies. You passed lifeless bodies on the ground and couldn’t bring yourself to look down. Some of them you might even recognize, and that wasn’t something you could bring yourself to feel right about now. Your emotions were running wild enough as it is; the last thing you needed was to find the body of someone you loved.
Your wand was tightly gripped in your hand, your mouth repeating the same spells over and over as Death Eaters continued to swarm the homely school grounds. You had called this place ‘home’ for seven years and yet now, it was the last possible place you wanted to be. You wanted to turn around and run, never to look over your shoulder again.
But you couldn’t.
There was no way you could bring yourself to leave. Not now.
“Well, what ‘ave we got ‘ere?”
You spun on the spot, coming face to face with the sunken eyes of a Death Eater. His voice sounded awfully familiar, but that was really the least of your problems right about now. His wand was raised in your direction, his lips already beginning to move.
You raised your own wand, ready to fire out the first spell you could think of. But the man went flying back into the wall before you could even open your mouth. You gaped down at your wand, trying to figure out how the hell you managed to do that without even thinking of the spell.
“Reckon that’s about the fourth time I’ve saved you.”
You turned to the sound of the voice, recognizing it immediately. George’s hair was tousled like crazy, and he had a bandage tightly wound around his head. You could see faint blood where his ear should be, and your heart did a quick flip in your chest. You had heard about his accident — you had run into Ginny in the Great Hall, but seeing his wound and his face in person brought an unsettling feeling to your chest.
“George,” you sighed, running over to him without a second doubt. You jumped up, wrapping your arms around his neck tightly, squeezing harder than you thought. But he didn’t seem to mind, his arms finding their way around your waist and holding you up, his head finding its spot in the crook of your neck as he let out a low chuckle. You could feel the warmth of his skin, and in that moment, he felt so real. As if two years apart had never happened. As if everything said between you two in your letters was unspoken, but acknowledged. 
You pulled your head away from his shoulder and looked into his eyes. The eyes that had been a comfort source in your life for so many years. As if looking into them brought out all of your confidence, you gave him a shy smile before leaning down and pressing your lips against his.
You immediately pulled away from him before either of you could register the action, letting yourself fall back down to your feet as you looked up into his eyes. He didn’t blink, his mouth hanging open.
Maybe you made a terrible mistake.
“Oh, I’m sorry—” 
You were cut off by his hands on each side of your face, pulling you in for a second kiss. One that lasted much longer. 
His lips were incredibly soft against yours, moulding as if this was the place they were meant to be. Your hands went up into his hair, giving a small tug as he pulled your body closer to his. It was as if all the war and death around you two didn’t exist — the only thing you could focus on was George’s warmth and the eruption of butterflies that went off in your body.
After what felt like hours, you pulled away and looked up at him. His lips were swollen and red, his breathing slightly uneven, but he looked happy.
“That was long overdue,” he sighed, running a hand through his hair. 
You let out a breathy laugh, “Definitely.”
———————————————————————
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pasiveagressive · 3 years ago
Text
Pen Pal // h.s.
Warning: light language, there is a mention of self harm, and some verbal abuse. 
Highschool AU This is really long for me 9.4k words and it’s not really done I am thinking a part 2 and maybe even a 3. Let me know what you think!
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When she was five she was given a project from her teacher saying that she had to write to a pen pal. She had no idea what a pen pal was and how she got one, but she had told the class that a pen pal was someone who lived far away and we wrote a letter to them. Their letters were going to England to another class and they had to write them and they had to write back. This sounded fun. Teacher had a hat in her hands and when she passed it around we had to pick out a piece of paper that contained a name and an address. She took her's out and saw the name, it was a boy, she didn't like boys, well that wasn't true, the only boy's she liked were her brother, her best friend and her daddy. The teacher told the class they had to write to their pen pals for the whole school year.
#####
When she was ten, she still wrote to her pen pal, she didn't understand why she had been writing him for the last five years, but she had been. He was funny and easy to talk too, she thought that perhaps this boy was going to be her first crush, something she thought one of her brother's friends would be, but she was pretty sure this boy was. He helped her through a lot, like when Mommy and Daddy argued and doors slammed or when Mommy packed up her suitcases and left or when Daddy didn't come down from his room and her brother had to take care of her or when Daddy changed. He helped her a lot, and she helped him too, they sometimes even helped each other with their homework. She had found a true friend in him, and she hoped he felt the same about her.
#####
When she was twelve her Daddy let her have an E-Mail and she told the boy, he too had an E-mail and they talked on MSN all the time, but they still wrote letters to each other, personally hand written pieces of paper seemed much nicer than typed words on a screen. Her brother was about to be in high school now and she would be starting middle school next year. The boy had started middle school this year and it was the first time, she realized, that she knew how old he was. They would talk about homework; friends and she asked him questions about boys. The boy didn't answer a lot of them but she didn't mind, the only boy she cared about noticing her was him, but then something dawned on her. They may never meet.
When she was fifteen she started High School and the boy was a year ahead of her. Her mother had returned to the city, remarried, and she wanted to see her children, but she refused to go, as far as she was concerned her mother had abandoned her and her brother and her Father had taken care of them, but he had changed even more. Her brother would soon be off to college and she would still be here, her father wasn't so bad, only when he disapproved of something did he get angry, he never struck her, her brother would never allow it, he was protective over his baby sister especially now that boy's had started to notice her. She still wrote to the boy and told him all about her problems, it had been ten years and she could still confide in him and he confided in her and she liked it that way. It meant that somewhere she had someone who cared, someone who listened. Someone who knew her better than anyone.
###
She was sixteen when her world began to change, she still wrote to the boy and now she had a boyfriend, one of her brother's friends, she was a cheerleader and he was a soccer player and was on the swim team. Then she got a letter, it said that he had received a scholarship to her school and he was coming to New York, she was ecstatic and began to write him back when the pen suddenly fell from her hands as she realized something she had been denying. She had feelings for the boy with the elegant handwriting and who always wrote in blue pen. He couldn't come here, not when she had a boyfriend, but who was she kidding, they didn't know what each other looked like, so maybe she could hide who she was from him, the only thing he knew about he was her name and there was more than one Y/N in her school, but he never called her by her real name, when he was ten he gave her a nickname and nobody knew it except for him. She realized how ridiculous she was being, this boy had no romantic interest in her and if he did, what did it matter? She has a boyfriend now.
What she didn't know was when he came to New York her whole life would change and he would be a part of that change.
She had feelings for the boy with the elegant script and blue pen, and they were not going to go away.
"Ugh, how can you eat so much?"
Y/N Y/L/N looked at a friend with thinly veiled disgust, she had no idea where Maya put it all and considering she was eating cafeteria food, it made it just that much worse. Especially because today's menu was all seafood.
"Excuse me for being one of the few girls in the world that acknowledges a love for food." She said and then took a bite out of a fish stick and grinned.
"Hey, I like food just not too much." Y/N said, eyeing what could only be Maya's twentieth piece of fried fish.
"That's because you, my friend, are a cheerleader and must stay in impeccable shape." Maya winked and then went back to eating.
Y/N sighed, it was true, part of the reason as to why she didn't eat a lot was cheerleading, she needed to stay small so she could tumble and be thrown in the air. Maya seemed to resent her for the fact that she was a cheerleader, but Y/N could not help it if Maya did not have great hand eye coordination. She knew Maya didn't really like her, but she put up with having her around because Will and Joel liked her. She didn't know why Maya hated her, she thought it was partly because she was part of the in crowd and Maya thought that they were all snobs.
Y/N was no snob.
Someone patted her head and she turned to look and was looking into the kind eyes of her best friend.
Will Davis.
His brown hair was in his eyes, covering the chocolate orbs. He sat down, his skinny frame folding easily on the chair. He had to push his glasses from the end of his nose back up to where they were supposed to be. Y/N couldn't help but grin at him, he was so normal, that was why she opted to sit with him at lunch and not the—as Maya bluntly puts it—the popular hoes.
Y/N looked over at her other friends, they were crowded around their table near the window, laughing and joking, she saw her best friend Isabella and her brother Jack, they looked annoyingly happy. She was well aware that Jack liked Isabella but his feelings were not reciprocated, but Jack was a star at school, everyone wanted to be with him, especially Kayla.
Y/N hated Kayla.
"Well, I'm done; I'm going to go prepare for class." She smiled at the group and dumped the contents of her tray into the garbage and left her tray on top, leaving the cafeteria, she straightened out her uniform and remembered something.
She had had practice this morning and all of her bag was still in her locker, crammed into the small space. She had gotten a lift with her brother today so she had to put all of her stuff in his car. Huffing, she spun back around and walked over to her brother's table, feeling the eyes of her other friends on her, as if she was betraying them.
She knew that they thought sooner or later she would stop sitting with them and sit with the 'popular' crowd, but she sat with them because they were superficial, they were fun to be around and she liked them, even Maya on her good days.
"Jacky," she said, arriving at the table and stopping in front of her brother. He seemed to be in an overly animated conversation with Liam, her more or less boyfriend.
"Yes?" He looked up at her, sounding bored.
"I need your keys so I can put my stuff in your car." She held her hand out expectantly but Jack made no move to hand over the keys. She was aware that the group was staring and acutely aware that Kayla was practically drooling over her brother, she didn't see the big deal. She could admit that he was nice looking but hot? No way, then again he was her brother it would be weird if she thought he was a god like the rest of the school.
Jack was nearly eighteen and this was his senior year, along with Liam, Kayla and a few others. He received a lot of female attention and people were always asking if they were really related, Y/N could see why, they looked nothing alike.
Jack had silvery blonde hair and dark eyes, he was tall and had a soccer player's build, where Y/N had Y/C/H and Y/C/E, and had a frame that was slightly toned from nearly four years of cheerleading.
Y/N never understood why she was a cheerleader, she wasn't a girly girl and she didn't dress up a lot, she was more into art, but then cheerleading provided her with confidence and made her feel alive like nothing had before, she loved the feeling of being tossed into the air and soaring like a bird. It was freeing.
"How do I know that you aren't going to joy ride and leave me stranded here?" Y/N scoffed at this.
"Honestly, even if I was going to do that, you would never be stranded, I'm sure there are a million people who would give you a ride." She batted her lashes innocently at him.
He could never deny giving his sister anything, he loved her, he had taken care of her when Father had been unfit, he watched over her, he protected her.
"Fine, here, but give them straight back." He said firmly and she rolled her eyes.
"Yeah yeah." She said turning back and going to her locker. Maybe she should joyride, just to teach him a lesson, then again, that would be one time that Jack didn't protect her.
Y/N walked to her locker, putting in the combination and opening it; grabbing her bag she hauled it over her shoulder and was about to head out to the student parking lot when a hand gently grabbed her waist pulling her back. She raised her eyes to see Liam, smiling down at her.
Liam was her boyfriend, she supposed, they had been together for over a month now and Y/N was very happy. He was very good looking with brown hair that had a messy on purpose look, brown eyes, like melting chocolate, a tall stature and the build of a soccer player mixed in with the grace of a swimmer.
"Hey," he said as he moved, causing her to walk back and feel the cool metal of the locker's behind her.
"Hey," she said smiling. Liam's hand snaked out to play with a strand of her hair. He always played with her hair, Y/N didn't understand the fascination, it was a big frizz ball as far as she was concerned.
"Any plans tonight?" He asked while still fiddling with her hair.
"Sure, with the most wonderful man." Liam looked confused and let her hair fall back. "You should meet him, ever heard of Edgar Allen Poe?" She smirked as he shook his head.
"You are a devil woman." He moved so that Y/N could do what she had originally planned and put her bag in her brother's car.
"Walk with me?" She asked and he nodded, taking her bag and holding her hand.
She knew a lot of girls didn't understand why Liam was dating her; she didn't understand it herself, he was popular, the whole female population of Anchor Academy wanted him and threw dagger looks at her in the halls, but she revelled in it, for once she was envied, for once people wanted to be her.
Y/N deposited her bag in the boot of her brother's truck and turned to the back seat where she knew she had left her pencil box, she slid them into her brown leather backpack and locked the car—after closing the door—and spun to Liam. He had his hands on her hips and was staring down at her with a burning intensity.
"Do you want to do something tonight?" He asked in a shaky voice. They had never been this close before, they hadn't even done more than pecks, she didn't know what was stopping her but she knew she was grateful that he was patient, she wondered how long that would last.
"I can't, I'm sorry, but I have to finish this assignment." The bell rang then and Y/N now understood the meaning of the phrase saved by the bell. "I need to go, but I'll see you tomorrow?" She got on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek, waving as she headed to class.
Y/N wasn't exactly lying to Liam, she did need to finish this assignment, but it wasn't due for another two weeks. Y/N knew why she didn't go out a lot on school days, but that was her secret.
#####
Y/N sat at her computer desk, researching for this English paper when her chat window came up.
Hello Y/N
Y/N smiled and typed back. They had been friends for eleven years now, he knew her inside and out as she knew him, except for the fact that they had no idea what the other looked like, she thought and he agreed that it would be better to keep their faces hidden, like real pen pals.
Y/N remembered the day she had been told she had to write to him and the day he walked into her life, never walking out.
Y/N sat at her seat next to her new friend Will. He was funny looking; he had really big glasses and funny hair. They were friends because Y/N saw him reading and she wanted to read too. 
"Okay guy, we are doing a fun new assignment called Pen Pals! This means, each of you will select a name from this hat," She held the hat out for show. "And you will write that person a letter and then they will write you one and you will keep replying until the end of the year. Does that sound like fun?" The teacher was overexcited, Y/N didn't see the big deal, she was writing to a stranger. Her mom always told her never to talk to strangers. 
The hat was passed around and Y/N dipped her hand in and pulled out a piece of paper, handing the hat to Will. She opened the paper and saw the name of her 'Pen Pal'.
Harry Styles
Under his name was what she thought was an address. She pulled out a piece of paper and a pencil and began to write her first letter.
Dear Harry...
You're distracting me from homework, Y/N replied to Harry. When she had started that assignment she had no idea she was going to make a lifelong friend, a best friend and she had, in Harry, he had been her first crush, even if she hadn't officially met him, Y/N had wanted him to be her first kiss too, but that was impossible in case she was able to get a plane to England and the little savings she had in her piggy bank, Father gave her money but she always used that on the weekends, going to movies or restaurants or clubs.
Really, what are you doing? 
She was about to respond when he wrote something else and she giggled.
More importantly, what are you wearing? ;)
Y/N shook her head; Harry was always a cocky smartass.
Edgar Allan Poe
You're wearing Edgar Allan Poe? Lucky guy
Oh haha! I am studying Edgar Allan Poe and wearing nothing
Harry didn't reply, which was uncommon for him, not much rendered him speechless, in the time they had spoken, be it through letter or internet, she had learnt a lot about Harry and his life, what he was like and what he was hiding, she felt as if she was one of the only people who knew the real Harry and somehow that made her feel lucky.
What poem?
He ignored the naked comment. Smooth.
Instead of typing the title, which he would then Google, Y/N wrote the poem to him, perhaps he could shed some light on it for she was having no luck.
Romance, who loves to nod and sing,
With drowsy head and folded wing,
Among the green leaves as they shake
Far down within some shadowy lake,
To me a painted paroquet
Hath been- a most familiar bird-
Taught me my alphabet to say-
To lisp my very earliest word
While in the wild wood I did lie,
A child- with a most knowing eye.
Of late, eternal Condor years
So shake the very Heaven on high
With tumult as they thunder by,
I have no time for idle cares
Through gazing on the unquiet sky.
And when an hour with calmer wings
Its down upon my spirit flings-
That little time with lyre and rhyme
To while away- forbidden things!
My heart would feel to be a crime
Unless it trembled with the strings.
Y/N awaited his response as she read over the lines of the poem herself. The poem was called Romance and Y/N really hoped Harry didn't read something onto the title.
Well Y/N, it seems you have a pickle in your hands here.
Ever the asshole, Harry didn't help her at all. She sighed, deciding he was too distracting for her to actually get work done.
I'm signing off, you really are no help. Talk to you soon. 
Y/N logged off before he could respond. For another hour she pondered what the poem could mean and then gave up and decided to concentrate on her art assignment. She was supposed to draw something that meant a lot to her but she couldn't think of anything except for Harry and she couldn't very well draw him, she had no idea what he looked like.
Then an idea no, more like an image, came to fruition within her thoughts and she began sketching, not knowing where this idea had come from, but she was going with it, it was all the help she was going to get.
Y/N awoke the next morning and sauntered into the kitchen, pouring herself some cereal she went to get milk when she saw the envelope sitting there, with her name written on the front in elegant script and written in blue biro. She knew who it was from immediately and sitting at the table, her breakfast forgotten, she opened the letter and started reading.
She was glad she didn't eat, because she probably would have just thrown it all up with the nausea she felt.
Harry was coming to New York, not only that he was coming to her school.
That was bad, he would see her, who she really was, who her friends were, what her friends were like, her brother and he would see what she looked like. Y/N suddenly felt extremely self conscious and opted not to wear her original outfit and instead wear baggy jeans, a tank top, a giant hoodie and ugly sneakers.
She didn't want Harry to see her because she knew, she knew that he would be beautiful and she was not, he would laugh at her and never speak to her again.
Y/N didn't think she could handle losing her friend, her best friend, her soul mate.
Y/N had never changed outfits so many times in her life.
She had gone from baggy, to slutty, to loose fitting, to tight, to exposing, to completely covered, and finally she decided to go for a mix and ended up in something she would normally wear. Looking at herself in the mirror she realised that being friends with Isabella had influenced her style way too much.
And even scarier, she had never put in this much effort to look nice for Liam.
Y/N was wearing a loose grey shirt with a leather belt that emphasised her small waist, a pair of black skinny jeans covered her legs and her feet were enclosed in ballet flats. Her hair was pinned on one side and her makeup was light, she wore no jewellery and she had her bag slung around her shoulders.
Y/N descended the stairs and grabbed a berry yogurt from the fridge for breakfast and waited for her brother.
Jack came down the stairs a few minutes later and nodded at her, picking up his backpack and an apple, grabbing his keys they were about to leave when their father came out from the study.
He was always in the study.
"Where are you going dressed like that?" He asked Y/N, his breath heavy with the scent of alcohol. Y/N looked down at her attire, not seeing anything wrong with it.
"What's wrong with it?" She asked cautiously, standing closer to Jack.
When her father drank, he drank until he couldn't see anymore and he always asked or commented on Y/N's looks and she knew why. She looked exactly like her mother. Jack always came to her rescue when he started on a tirade, she was grateful to have such a loving brother.
"It looks like you are trying to impress a man. I want to know who?" Y/N cringed back at the look her father gave her. She hated it when he was like this.
Ever since their mother had abandoned them, Y/N's father had indulged in Alcohol and, as a result, had lost his job. They had nearly lost their home until, one day; their father had snapped out of it and got himself together. He got another job and was earning good money, Jack got a part time job for extra money and Y/N also got a summer job to pay for art classes.
He still drank and when he did, Y/N would rather avoid him.
"No one sir, I was just trying out a new style."
"What's it called? Whore?"
"Father." Jack stepped in, standing between Y/N and their father. "Enough. You're drunk."
"Just like your mother, she abandoned you kids, I stayed and this is how you repay me? By looking like something out of a x-rated movie?"
Y/N bit her lip and kept her tears at bay.
He wasn't her daddy right now. He was the thing that their mother had made.
"Y/N," Jack whispered. "Go to the car." Y/N did and waited for Jack.
When he appeared she was fidgeting with her outfit.
"Y/N, you look beautiful. Don't listen to him."
She smiled as he unlocked the car. She put her stuff on the back seat and sat, buckling her seat belt and fiddling with the music as he took off towards school.
"But out of pure curiosity, who are you trying to impress?"
My pen pal from kindergarten who just moved to this school.
"No one, just trying something new."
#####
Harry rolled his eyes, walking along behind the chick giving him the tour of the school.
Isabella? That was her name he thought. She seemed to like to talk and look at herself and look at Harry. Typical Barbie teenager, he could have her in minutes if he wanted, but he was far too anxious about where he was and who he knew was here. He felt oddly nervous, but he didn't know why. He knew that he was good looking—okay, that was an understatement—he could get any girl he wanted with a snap of his fingers, but it was different now.
He knew everything about Y/N—except for what she looked like, which was a big thing for Harry. He could admit that he was shallow, he always went for the easy girls as opposed to any other girl, but he doubted that Y/N was easy.
The fact that she had a boyfriend said so.
Harry clenched his jaw at that thought, it was ridiculous to get annoyed over one word, but Y/N having a boyfriend was not the way he had pictured their first meeting to go. He expected her to fall into his arms or his bed, depending on the location.
He had to stop thinking of Y/N like that. They were friends, best friends, and had been since she was five and he was six, he loved her like a friend and cared about her. He lived for the days they would talk for hours. He loved being able to open up to her.
He loved having a girl as his friend that cared about him even though she had no idea what he looked like.
"And this is the cafeteria. You can sit with me, you said you played soccer right?" Harry nodded at Isabella's question. "Good, I sit with some soccer players." They walked into the room; it was white and blue with long tables and benches. There was a lineup for the food but Harry wrinkled his nose.
He never ate cafeteria food; he always brought his own lunch.
He had told his Grandmother this and she had packed him a lunch. His stomach growled thinking about it.
"Did you want some food?" She asked.
"I have some with me." He responded, giving her his signature smirk. She smiled back at him and batted her eyelashes as she trotted off to a table in the back with a group of boys and girls. Isabella sat and gestured to a spare seat next to her in which Harry took.
"Everyone," She announced, gesturing to the group as a whole. "This is Harry Styles, he's new. He moved here from England and he too plays soccer."
"Interested in trying out? We need a new player." A boy with light silver-white hair asked.
"Sure," Harry responded nonchalantly, when really the prospect of playing the game he loved so much gave him a kick of adrenaline.
"Excellent. Come to practice this afternoon." He reached over offering his hand. "I'm Jack, captain, goalie." Harry shook his hand, recognising the name.
My older brother, Jack, is starting second grade next year.
Jack starts high school soon.
My brother got into the soccer team.
Jack was made captain!
So, this was Y/N's brother. He studied the boy, trying to imagine his features on a girl. An image rose. Dark eyes, contrasting with a pale complexion, tall and stringy, like a beanstalk, with a bit of athleticism due to cheerleading and long silvery hair.
Harry wasn't entirely put off by the image.
"That's Isabella, as you know." Jack continued, pointing to the girl next to him. "Cherr captain. Laney and Kayla are also cheerleaders. Liam, Jared are also on the team. The others are around somewhere, but we all prefer each other's company."
Harry acknowledged everyone with a nod, noting that Liam was a boy with dark hair and eyes and was also, he suspected, Y/N's boyfriend.
This guy, one of my brothers' friends, asked me out so I won't be able to talk tonight.
Liam, the guy I went on a date with, asked me to be his girlfriend. I said yes. 
Harry knew he was much better looking.
Harry looked around the cafeteria, trying to see if he could spot her.
"Ah," Jack said and here comes the most important member of our group.
Harry looked to where Jack was pointing and saw a girl walking towards them, tray in hand. Her eyes met Harry's and everything seemed to go silent. She was beautiful, not a generic beauty, but someone who didn't know how beautiful they were. Hair in a braid at her side, big luminous eyes widened as they looked at Harry. A small frame, with some muscle.
"Who?" Harry asked, not able to tear his eyes from her. His study happened in a split second; no one noticed that they had shared a moment.
A moment he would never forget.
"My sister."
The moment he first saw his Y/N.
#####
"Come on Y/N, you don't want to miss him, he is so hot." Stella, her partner in science, pushed Y/N out of the class.
She was trying to get Y/N to the cafeteria to see the new boy, she had heard about him all day and received an excited message from Isabella saying she was escorting him. She had heard he was hot but she knew something about him that no one else did.
The new boy was Harry Styles, her pen pal for over ten years.
Y/N was nervous as her and Stella approached the cafeteria, Stella scanned the room and her shoulders slumped in disappointment.
"He isn't here yet. Let's line up, by the time we get our food, he should be here."
Y/N waited in line, noting that her brother and boyfriend came through and immediately sat down. They never ate school food. Y/N was envious. She hated the oily, bland food they made. She made a note to go car shopping sooner so that she could leave during lunch and buy something.
Y/N got her tray and on it placed an apple juice, a salad, a chocolate muffin and a small bowl of Mac 'n' Cheese.
Y/N decided to sit at her Brother's table today—well Isabella had decided for her—and as she made her way over, she stopped dead in her tracks as her eyes met with him.
His eyes were bright, emerald green and his hair was shaggy and brunette, falling under his chin and just above his eyes. His skin was sun kissed and he had an athlete's build. He was the most handsome boy Y/N had ever seen. Then it registered.
She had never seen this boy before, he was sitting with her brother, her boyfriend and Isabella and he, too, was staring at her.
She felt a lump build in her throat and she didn't need Stella's input.
"That's him, the new boy."
Y/N gulped and suddenly felt the urge to run and hide.
The new boy.
Her boy.
Her best friend.
Harry Styles, her Harry.
Y/N was able to move from her spot once Stella broke the trance she had been in.
She didn't look at him when she got to the table, taking a seat next to Liam and realising with annoyance that Harry was across from her. She couldn't look at him, then they would all know. They would know she knew Harry, she cared for Harry and she couldn't let that happen.
"Hey baby," Liam said as she settled in her seat. Leaning forward to kiss her on the cheek. Y/N's eyes inadvertently went to Harry as his lips made contact. His eyes blazed and his jaw tightened as Liam kissed her, but Y/N didn't understand why.
"Ow," Liam said as he pulled away, glaring at Jack. "Who just throws bread at someone?"
"That's my sister," Jack said. "Next time, it won't be bread."
"Jack, you are so overprotective. I am not a baby anymore" Y/N said, looking at her brother. It was the first words she had spoken since seeing Harry. She didn't look at him or tried not to anyway.
"Y/N!" Isabella said excitedly, drawing her attention. "This is Harry Styles; new guy from England, your brother is letting him try out for the team!"
Isabella, I know more about him than you, shut up and stop looking at him like that!
Y/N let her gaze go to Harry.
"Really? You must be something special to get that stubborn JACKass to let you try out." She smiled innocently at Jack.
"Oh you have no idea." Harry replied, his voice like heaven.
"We'll see about that." Liam said, slinging his arm around Y/N. "Are you coming to see his tryout babe?"
Y/N looked over at Harry who smirked at her quickly before glancing down at his untouched lunch. He seemed to have packed lunch, Y/N found that cute.
"Wouldn't miss it."
###
Y/N changed into some workout clothes.
"Alright," Isabella said as they stretched on the field. "We are going to practice the cheers for next weeks game, because frankly you suck at it. Let's go!"
Isabella was nothing if not direct.
She looked out at the field and saw Liam; he smiled and waved to her. Jack saw this and whacked him over the head.
Y/N couldn't help but laugh at that.
Then she noticed Harry and all laughter died as they looked at one another from across the field. He was shirtless, and boy did he look good, and he made it no secret to check her out. Y/N turned from him before Liam or Jack saw the look Harry was giving her.
She was distracted all through practice, but luckily, she wasn't the worse one here. A lot of the other girls were distracted by Harry too. Y/N tried not to dwell on that.
As the cheerleaders were packing, Y/N noticed Jack and Harry shaking hands and smiling.
He must have made the team
She saw Liam then and he began to walk over to her, she smiled and walked over to him, after having packed up what she was supposed to, and he wrapped his arms around her, resting his head on top of hers.
"So, Harry is a pretty good player isn't he?" Y/N said as she pulled away from Liam, taking his hand and walking to where she would change.
"Yeah, I guess so, hopefully he will be enough to get us out of this slump."
"I'm sure he will be." They had reached the entrance to the girl's locker room and Y/N looked up at Liam, his brown eyes smiling at her.
"Do you want me to take you home?"
Y/N was about to say no, that Jack gave her a lift to school and would take her home but then she thought about how little time she spent with Liam and nodded, hurrying to get changed and coming back out in record time.
"That was fast." He commented, smirking at her as he took her school bag.
"Well, I wanted to spend time with you." Y/N crinkled her nose. The girl's locker room always smelled like perfume, too much perfume and all of different scents. It got quite difficult to breathe in there.
"Cutie."Liam bent down and brushed his lips over Y/N's. 
Liam pulled back grinned, Y/N stood and stared up at him, unable to form words.
The kiss was small, short and...Nice.
"Why Miss Y/L/N I do believe my kissing has stunned you into silence. I am quite good."
Y/N shook her head and shoved his arm playfully, about to say something smartass back to him when something caught her eyes. A flash, retreating into the boys' locker room.
Harry?
She turned back to Liam and they continued walking, they were nearly at his car when she remembered something. Slapping a hand to her forehead. Liam looked down at her in concern.
"Shoot, I forgot my homework in my locker. I'll be right back." She began to run towards the school.
"Do you want me to come with you?"
"I'll meet you at the car in a couple of minutes." She called back to him, dashing into the doors and running to her locker.
She put in the combination and got the book she needed, shutting her locker door she turned to go and jumped, seeing something she hadn't noticed before.
"Well, alone at last."
Y/N looked up at the person before her, feeling her insides melt.
"Harry," She breathed, unable to say anything but his name.
"Well Y/N, we meet at last."
Y/N looked up at Harry. She wasn't ready for this, no matter how many times she told herself she was, she wasn't and she realised she never would be ready to meet Harry. He was someone that she could turn to when she needed a shoulder to cry on. He was someone she could tell everything to—she had told everything to him and he was her best friend, someone who knew her better than anyone and now that he was here, she regretted telling him all those things. She regretted letting Harry in.
"I should go," she mumbled and started to walk away. Harry grabbed her arm and she spun, nearly head butting his chest. For a moment she stood frozen and, annoyingly, a song started playing through her head, one that she should not be thinking about when she had a boyfriend.
At last, my love has come along, my lonely days are over.
"Y/N" Harry whispered and she saw how close their faces were, his lips mere centimetres from hers. If she leaned forward, just a little, they would kiss and she had thought about kissing Harry plenty. Harry seemed to be thinking the same thing. His eyes travelled down to her lips and then back to her eyes. He was about to say something. Y/N wanted to hear it, she wanted to hear what he had to say to her, but the trance they were in was broken when Harry smirked down at her and spoke.
"I always imagined our meeting to go a little...differently."
Y/N didn't like his tone and managed to step out of his grip on her arm.
"You've imagined our meeting?" She asked, her voice coming out a little breathlessly.
"All the time, Y/N," she tried not to think of how her nickname—the name only he called her—sounded like a caress. "I mean, we've known each other for years and we have never met. I've always wondered what it would be like." He grinned wickedly at her and Y/N felt herself respond with a small, teasing, smile. One Isabella had taught her.
Damn her flirting classes to the pits of hell!
"Well, it's great to, you know, finally meet you. We should definitely hang out some—" Harry placed a hand over her mouth and moved his eyes in the direction of an empty room. Y/N felt her brow furrowed in confusion and then she registered the sound of footsteps. She didn't have time to respond before Harry was walking towards the room, with her in tow, locking the door and pulling the blind down.
"Harry," She hissed. "What are you—?"
"Y/N?"
The voice came from the hallway and Y/N widened her eyes as she recognised it. Harry put a finger to his lips in the international sign for silence.
"Y/N, baby?"
Liam was walking past the door and Y/N had to resist the urge to yell out his name, Harry saw this and leaned into her, whispering in her ear. His breath caused her to shiver.
"Y/N, I just want to talk to you alone."
"Harry, he's my ride home and my boyfriend," she said defensively.
"Text him and tell him you need to do something really quickly and you'll be out soon."
Y/N looked up at Harry, planning on defying him and then she thought about it. She would never be alone with Harry again and she had wanted to meet him—talk to him in person—for years. Perhaps she should listen.
She took her phone out and sent a quick text to Liam.
Hey babe. Running late, meet you out the front in a few? Sorry for taking so long xox
Harry gave her an approving look as they heard Liam's phone go off and he headed back down the hallway, leaving the school.
"Okay, you have five minutes, what?" She asked Harry.
The Harry in her head looked like the Harry before her except for the attitude. Her Harry was sweet, funny and romantic. Harry, though funny, didn't seem to have anything sweet in him.
"Cute," Harry said and she looked up seeing one corner of his mouth was turned up in a smile.
"What is?" She asked.
"You," he grinned and Y/N grinned back. Then her smiled faded as he kept looking her up and down. Y/N squirmed uncomfortably under his scrutiny. He was looking at her like...like a piece of meat, ogling her. This was not how she imagined Harry would look at her; she imagined kindness to shine from his eyes and a feeling of safety to wrap around her.
Right now, all she felt was...uncomfortable.
"Look Harry," Y/N said, raising her eyes to his. "I really need to go," she said firmly, trying to get him to shake off the look of a stranger checking out the best piece of ass. He didn't.
"Oh Y/N, I have been waiting to meet you for over ten years and you're just going to walk away from me?" He shook his head. "I thought we were friends, best friends."
"We were—are—but Harry, I really need to go. I'll—I'll talk to you later, tonight, okay?" He gave her a curious look.
"No girl," he said slowly, "has ever walked away from me. It is unfamiliar and quite disconcerting. I don't like it very much but it seems to make you far more endearing. I enjoy a good chase, Y/N," he raised his eyebrows suggestively. "But be warned, I am quite good at catching what I want."
Y/N looked at him with disgust and shoved past him.
So this was who her best friend really was, an asshat that liked to use girls. Well, she wasn't going to be one of them.
"If I had known this is what you were really like," she said, hand on the door knob, turning to face him, "I never would have kept writing to you."
Harry drummed his fingers in time with the music on the steering wheel of his car.
He was driving to a local corner store, a mini mart of sorts, to get some things for his grandmother. He didn't mind helping her. She was letting him live with her, rent free and even gave him money for doing her favours. Harry didn't want to take it, but she was pushy and would put it in his wallet while he was asleep.
He smiled at the thought.
"I never would have kept writing to you."
His smile fell as that unpleasant thought worked its way into his mind and he slammed his hand, hard, on the steering wheel, berating himself. He couldn't believe how bad his meeting with Y/N went. He was such an ass. He knew he was, he could proudly admit it and also admit to the fact that there was no hidden reason behind his being an ass, no woman who scorned him, no abusive relationship with his parents and no reason at all.
Except that he was an ass and he enjoyed being an ass.
Mostly.
His arrogance only got him so far in life. Sometimes he would have to reel it in and suck up his pride and stop being an ass. Perhaps he should have done that with Y/N.
She had always been there for him, since he was six years old and first received her letter. When he found out she was a girl he was instantly annoyed, girls had cooties, but he wrote back anyway. That stupid egg headed boyfriend of hers had  called her baby and Harry had to suppress a laugh at that, he had had so many babies in his short life and knew that more would come. But there is only one Y/N
It had been a week since Y/N had spoken to him and if she did look at him, she glared. It bothered Harry, more than he was willing to admit, that this girl he had known for so long—and had finally met—may hate him. He had no one but himself to blame, it was easy to act differently when typing on a computer or writing a letter.
Harry only acted that way with family and very close friends. Never had he acted the way he had with Y/N with any other girl. He had never given them special nicknames or blown off parties to 'hang out'. He never stayed up all night talking or anxiously awaiting a reply.
He had never wanted someone like he wanted Y/N.
Not in a physical way, although she was remarkably good looking. He wanted Y/N on an emotional level too. He wanted to kiss her if he wanted and do things to her he had done before with other girls, but he also wanted to be able to talk to her, to tell her how he felt and have her listen and in turn, listen to her.
Was this love he was feeling? Had he fallen in love with the girl who never wrote in cursive and never stuck to one pen colour?
Harry thought about it and a startling revelation came to him.
He was most definitely in love with Y/N.
There was no other way to explain his feelings and even—dear god!—the silly grin that was now on his face as he thought about it. He pulled up to a red light and groaned, hitting the steering wheel.
I'm in love with my best friend and treated her like crap.
God he was stupid.
Y/N had been a constant in his life. He had always been able to turn to her for comfort and she had turned to him. He knew more about her than anyone probably did. He knew that when her mother left, Y/N had cut one line along her wrist and then looked at herself in disgust for doing it because her mother didn't deserve her blood. He knew that she hadn't spoken to her mother—Val—since she walked out, and he knew what her father would call her when he was drunk.
He knew her favourite colours, movies, T.V. shows, books and what she wanted to do. He knew her fears and her dreams. He knew that she loved carrots and detested broccoli. He knew that she would only ever dot her I's with hearts if hell froze over, and she liked to draw smiley faces on the toes of her converse.
He smiled thinking about it all and then he saw her in his memory, the way she had looked when he had first laid eyes on her and his heart sped up.
I am in love, aren't I?
He didn't understand how he was in love. He always thought he would fall in love when he was older. He knew Y/N, inside and out and he realised that he had been falling in love with her, slowly, since that first letter and had been in love with her long before he saw her.
Harry jolted with surprise at that, as the light turned green and he continued to drive, he was shallow. He knew it. He only ever paid attention to a girl if she was good looking and flaunted it; tight tops, pants, short skirts, the lot. If you didn't have any of that, he wasn't interested.
With Y/N it was different, he had never seen her before and yet he always wanted to spend his time with her. Re-reading her letters, seeing if she was online, anything really. He made excuses to stay in and talk to her. He would rush home if he knew he would receive a letter from her and butterflies would go crazy in his stomach as he saw the envelope.
She always wrote on nice stationery and sprayed the letter with perfume.
He loved going on her words, tracing them with his fingers.
God, Harry thought as he pulled into the car park for the store and got out, locking his silver Audi and moving to the entrance of the store.
He froze for a moment, the last thought in his mind, whirring around as he looked at the one person behind the counter and his heart soared. They didn't see him and he ducked into an aisle as he calmed his heart and that thought that was still nagging at him.
God, I'm in love with Y/N.
#####
"Isabella, I only have a short break, what do you want?"
Y/N held the phone against her ear and shoulder as she listened to Isabella babble about the upcoming school dance. She rolled her eyes, her school had too many dances. This one was a welcoming back dance, although it wasn't scheduled for another month or so, but Isabella always had to start preparing early.
"I'm thinking blue, maybe. I think I look good in blue and gold for you. Maybe not blue, that would clash with the gold. I know, red! I'll wear red and gold and you can wear gold and red!" She chirped excitedly.
"What's the difference?" Y/N asked, opening her chocolate bar.
"Red is my feature colour, so it will be the colour of my dress and nails and lip stick and I will have gold shoes and accessories. Gold will be your feature colour and red you sub colour. Duh Y/N, have I taught you nothing?"
She rolled her eyes, thankful that Izzy couldn't see her.
"Alright, but red and gold remind me of curtains."
"Curtains?"
"Yeah, like older mansions always had red curtains and gold ropes and poles," she shrugged. "Reminds me of curtains, plus, red doesn't go with skin tone.”
"So what colour would you suggest for yourself?"
"Black."
There was a pause and then Isabella yelled into the phone.
"Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N! You are not going to another dance in a black dress! For the love of God! Wear some colour!"
"But black is—"
"Black is a colour you wear once in a while. Not. At. Every. Social. Function," Isabella ground out and Y/N winced. "That's it! I managed to get you to dress like a girl everyday now I have to get you to dress in colours when we go out. I am scheduling a shopping trip...Two weeks before the dance. For now, we will browse online."
"Isabella—"
"What are you wearing right now?"
"A skirt and top."
"Elaborate, Y/N. Shape, colour, design?"
She sighed but continued, knowing Isabella wouldn't stop until she had an answer.
"A green skirt that is longer at the back and zips up the front and a white tank top tucked into the waist band of the skirt. My shoes are white enclosed with a wedge heel design and I am wearing gold bracelets and a silver necklace with a heart on it."
"Good girl, see? If it weren't for me, you'd be dressed like Will." Y/N didn't try to deny it.
"Isabella, I really think—"
"No excuses. It's written. It's done. Get your fabulously dressed butt back to work and call me later."
Isabella hung up and Y/N stared at the phone for a moment before sighing and putting it back in her bra—girl's gotta do what a girl's got to do—and headed back out to the register, where Mr. Stark had been managing the register.
Mr. Stark owned the small convenience store that Y/N worked at and had been good friends with her father—still was apparently, and she got the job with no problems. The pay was good and the hours flexible.
Smiling at the old man, she took her seat behind the register and waited, flipping through a magazine as she did. She heard the bell above the door chime but didn't look up, until she felt a tingle go through her and when she looked, no one was there. She frowned and then shrugged. They probably went down an aisle.
Returning to her magazine, Y/N thought through Isabella's words.
Did she need to wear more colours? Did Isabella have a point in helping her change her wardrobe from drabby to, as she says, fabby?
Looking down at herself, her style had definitely changed and Y/N liked it, maybe she should stop wearing black dresses to every dance.
Y/N saw in her peripheral a customer approach and stowed her magazine away, scanner in hand. Looking up she saw, to her dismay, who it was that was placing the items down. Locking her jaw, she decided not to acknowledge him and started scanning and placing in the paper bags that Mr. Stark used, insisting it was better than plastic. When she finished scanning, she was annoyed to find that she had to acknowledge his presence.
"Will that be all?" She asked, not quite meeting Harry's eyes. The green seemed to blaze into her.
"I think so, Y/N." The name was like a caress and Y/N had to suppress a shiver of delight. "Actually," Harry amended and Y/N looked up from typing in the total. "One more thing, when do you get off?"
"Do you use that line on every girl?" She asked, typing in the total as Harry fished bills from his wallet and handed them to her.
"Only girls I like." Y/N didn't pause in counting his change, but his words caused a thrill to go through her. "So, when do you get off?"
"Why?" She asked, handing him back his change.
"Because I want to talk, don't friends usually talk?"
"Friends yes, I wasn't aware we were friends Harry," she responded, still refusing to meet his gaze.
"Y/N," He sighed. "What I said, it was completely out of line. I—I'm sorry. I was so nervous meeting you. I mean, you imagine something for so long you want it to go perfectly and then you lose all sense and start blabbering." He ran a hand through his hair and Y/N finally met his gaze.
She could see that he was sorry, in the depths of green there was regret.
"I get off at 4," she said, which was an hour away.
"Would you mind—would you mind if I took you home?"
Y/N looked up at him and saw that he was nervous. Harry had always seemed so confident in his letters and typing that she hadn't thought he could get nervous and with his looks, she thought there was no need. Although what he had said to her still hurt, she had known Harry was a player, he had told her as much, but she had never thought—never imagined—that he would treat her like one of those countless other girls, and that hurt more than words could describe.
Her decision was made as she quickly mulled that over and she told him her answer.
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translationandbetrayals · 2 years ago
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Oyasumi Punpun: a personal view on one of the best things I've ever read.
As a child, before I became a teenager, I used to love searching for mangas and trying to copy the beautiful drawings that I saw on each page. When I grew up I started to occupy my time on other things and I forgot about my whole fascination for manga, as I got closer to western comics (Watchmen being my all time favorite).
Then, two years ago, when I was locked inside my house during the forced quarantine that the whole world had to experiencie, I found out about Oyasumi Punpun. I know there are a lot of posts about this manga, maybe with the same ideas that I'm going to talk about, but I believe that it is a creation that doesn't leave people indifferent.
Melancholy is portrayed accurately in a lot of works from different areas: arts, music, literature, psychology, performance, movies, and of course, manga and anime. This feeling of a void inside of our souls is universal: eastern and western cultures approach it in their own ways, but sometimes they can create a portrait that is so truthful that it can haunt its audience.
So, what makes Punpun so popular?what makes this manga a touching experience to the reader?and why do I consider Inio Asano's most known story to be the best manga that I've read so far? we'll dive into that in the next lines.
To start, I'll talk about the story and the events in a little summary that doesn't pretend to tell each detail (we have Wikipedia for that, don't we?). Maybe you've been asking to yourself whether if reading Oyasumi Punpun is a good idea or not. Of course I encourage you to read it, but it might be a little too graphic or heavy for some people (which is totally OK, because this is a dense content).
We start off with Punpun Punyama, a little bird that lives with his parents and is their only child. Punpun seems to have a "normal" life: he is very innocent, and he is not capable, in a certain way, to see the dark side of his life. He is not aware of the problems that his parents have: the weird personality of his mom, or the alcoholism and violence problems of his dad. His uncle himself has a story with depression and different struggles that are revealed later in the other volumes. 
On his first day of school, we are shown that he is "in love" with a girl who is a bully, but at the same time is very popular among her classmates. That day, the teacher announces that she is moving away from the school, but one of the most important moments in the manga happens here: Aiko, a new girl, appears in the classroom as a new student that comes from another city. In the first volume we are introduced to different side stories that can be considered fun but at the same time are a little serious: for example, Aiko's "mother" works at selling some type of magic water, which embarasses Aiko, only to be discovered by Punpun and his uncle, who confronts the lady. Punpun discovers pornography and starts to fantasize about different scenarios with Aiko, because he falls in love with her and they start a cute "relationship" together, having their first kiss or having a lot of different conversations.
Punpun friends seem like really normal kids: Shimi, for example, is the typical kind of a boy that is kind of clumsy, in counterpart of Seki, his best friend, who is very independent and knows a lot for his age. Harumi is the one who leads the group in a certain way: he is a good-willed kid, after all, and he appears later on the manga in crucial moments. Sachi, a character that appears later, is a teenager that goes to an abandoned factory to draw, the exact same place where the group of children go out to play and search for ghosts. As everything happens, we see the toxic origins of Punpun's relationship with Aiko: it starts with a lot of small lies and threats, and it only gets worse through time. Punpun, after receiving a telescope from his father as a gift, decides that he's going to be a space scientist, to discover a new planet and save his love interest.
After promising Aiko to join her in her plan to escape from home, Punpun realises that he is not ready for this kind of commitement, and leaves her standing in the place they agreed to reunite some time ago. In this part of the manga, we see how Punpun's father ends up going to jail for beating his wife, sending his mom to the hospital and wishing she never had Punpun, how Punpun's last name changes from Punyama to Onodera, or how the uncle relies on his bitter way of seeing life. Also, a conspiracy is shown as another side story: a man called Toshiki Hoshikawa starts his own sect, which will be very important in the future events within the years.
With all of these scenes we have a base for what will come next: we can consider this manga as a "coming of age" story, that shows us how much everything can change with time: Punpun starts to grow up, being an adolescent at first, then a young adult and finally an adult without any life expectances. Death surrounds some characters too, and each time we look at this work, we have to consider that suicide is always a part of it (even as a controversial topic). We start with a story that seems cute, and has beautiful pannels, a very good construction of its characters and even funny moments... but all of this starts to drive us to a point when we will inevitably connect way too much, then end up crying or just thinking about life in a more philosophical way. A lot of the dialogues are intended to show different points of view, depending of each character.
Asides from the art, which is a treasure on its on way, we get a portrait of depression at its best. That's why it might be triggering for people who suffer from depression: because sometimes it dwells in our own wounds. The sensations that some chapters of the Manga give are "silent": they give this impression of total desolation and disability, being at times devastating. Some parts of the story occur as "plot twists" and the story doesn't get predictable: it creates its own paths, it resembles different pictures of melancholy. For example, the explicit sexual parts are never intended to be "erotic": they always leave this strange feeling of disgust, or sadness. Violence is present too, and we see Punpun turning into a complete mess, changing (metaphorically) the shape of his head, which we will never see as a human. 
Characters as Aiko live an existence that is full of hidden misery: in fact, Aiko is some kind of a paradox, because she is beautiful but her life is terrible, only to become worse when Punpun appears in the picture. Sachi, in other hand, is perhaps the most mature character: she is fully dedicated to her job, but she feels like she needs to save Punpun so she sticks to him in every way possible, and even saves him. We see how Punpun's close circle of people affect each of his actions, and we see how Punpun's choices affect others too.
Now, talking about my personal experience, I feel like this manga is one of those pieces that create some sort of a "new" self: I feel like there was one Mikami before I read Oyasumi Punpun, and when I finished it I was another person. Maybe because I got so in touch with a lot of experiences from my own life, in aspects that are so different: despising life at some times, family issues, toxic relationships and the importance of friends. Not everything was bad, anyways, I had a good time reading it and I feel like I was more conscious of things as I analyzed it, but it hurt a lot. It hurt because Aiko and Punpun (the main story) are an example of a toxic couple, and by the time I read this I was just getting out from a relationship that destroyed me because it was based on lies and abandonment. We learn about the destructive power of love, and that was just what I was learning, along with different life depictions, such as the uncertainty of the future, the overwhelming feelings of loneliness or how some things that look like simple coincidences are much more complex and imply the result of our own decisions. 
I also feel that you can take everything differently if you experience the manga in another time of your life. I feel like this manga (again, paradoxically) has helped me to see that even when life seems so bad it can be accompanied by beautiful moments and people who are always there, with whom you can always count with. Of course, this is my own interpretation: it was a healing experience from all of the sad things that happened to me last year, and I'm very thankful with myself for having enough concentration to read all of the volumes.
Well, I hope after all of these words you might have imagined what Oyasumi Punpun is about, to help you decide if you feel like it's worth your time or not. If you read it before, I hope you enjoyed reading this (maybe we share some points of view in common, who knows?). Last but not least, I'm very thankful with the people who read all of the things I wrote. Sometimes I feel like these kind of things deserve to be talked about: we must take mental health as a real issue, and maybe if we remove some topics from the "taboo" spectrum we can improve as a society. 
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  By Camila Iglesias.
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kpop-zone · 4 years ago
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Selfish | Jihyo
Hogwarts AU | Enemies to Lovers | “Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck this shit. Fuck.”
Wordcount: 3,890
A/N: Sorry if the formatting is weird, but Tumblr won’t let me post anything on my computer, so I had to post this from my phone 😬
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“Y/N!”
When Jihyo saw you running through the hallway, she could immediately feel anger seething within her, and she called your name with a sharp tone.
“Oh Jihyo, fancy meeting you here.”
After hearing her voice, you had stopped running abruptly and were now grinning at her sheepishly, pretending like you didn’t know why she was staring you down.
“Stop feigning innocence, Y/N. You’re late. Again! Snape will for sure deduct some points from Gryffindor.”
Jihyo felt like ripping your head off. Of all the Gryffindors you were by far the most reckless one and usually involved when your house lost some points in one way or another. Your favorite activity was to prank Slytherins which always led to particularly hard punishments for your house by Professor Snape, the head of Slytherin. But you just didn’t seem to learn from your mistakes.
“You’re late too though...”
You smirked cheekily, causing her to get even angrier.
“Yeah but I have this opposing to you.”
With her right hand, she pulled out McGonagall’s letter that allowed her to be late for classes if her position as prefect required it and waved it in front of your face.
“That’s unfair.”
You pouted and Jihyo had to suppress her laughter. It was a little unfair indeed. She had simply overslept this morning, but as a prefect, she rarely got punished for anything. But she always told herself that she deserved those benefits. After all, she had to deal with you and your shenanigans almost every day.
“It’s not. I had some...important stuff to do this morning. And now go before we’re even later!”
She lied and you rolled your eyes before starting to run again.
Like expected, both of you arrived late to class and Snape gave you a lecture about the unreliability of Gryffindors for almost fifteen minutes. At the end, he took away some points from Gryffindor with a smug grin tugging on his lips, causing Jihyo to curse you silently. She was sure that Gryffindor had only lost the house cup championships to Slytherin because of you the past years. This year, she had to put a stop to it. Talking with you, however, wasn’t useful. The two of you were in your fifth year already and not once had you listened to her. She had to find another way to keep you in check. The only question was how... The options had thinned out over the years and it seemed like she was only left with one by now. Despite hating you with a passion though, that option seemed to be a little drastic and Jihyo had shied away from pursuing it until now. A fact that changed, however, when she walked into the Gryffindor common room that night.
“That was hilarious...”
“You should have seen Sejoo’s face.”
“I would have never dared to do that.”
Agitated chatter was filling the whole room and Jihyo immediately knew that something bad must have happened; something that most likely was connected with you in some way.
“What happened?”
Jihyo huffed while plopping down next to Jeongyeon on the couch.
“I don’t think you want to know...”
Her friend responded hesitantly and Jihyo buried her face in her hands in desperation.
“Y/N?”
She asked although she already knew the answer to her question.
“Yeah...Let’s just say the incident involved Y/N, Sejoo, the ‘Ossio Dispersimus’ spell and... a 200-points deduction for Gryffindor.”
Hearing the statement of Jeongyeon, Jihyo’s head snapped up and she looked at her classmate bewildered.
“200 POINTS???”
She yelled, causing the surrounding Gryffindors to look at her in shock. But Jihyo couldn’t care less about them. Enough was enough. You could be glad that you weren’t in the room right now, because she was sure that she would kill you if you were standing in front of her in this moment. You had once again ruined the championship for them with your selfishness and she was tired of it. You had to disappear. If you weren’t part of the student body anymore, Gryffindor couldn’t lose points because of you. And there was one easy way to reach that: she needed to get you suspended for the rest of the year and she already knew how.
If there was one person in this school that hated you more than she did, it was Snape. He had tried to get rid of you on several occasions, but your misdeeds had never been severe enough to make him reach his goal. But if she would help a little, she was sure that they could get you out of the way with joined forces. It was a risky scheme, but Jihyo was sure that she could come up with the perfect plan. For two weeks, she martyred her brain to find a way to set you up while protecting her own reputation simultaneously. Coincidentally and much to Jihyo’s chagrin, you didn’t get into any more trouble in those two weeks. On the contrary, you actually stood out for behaving extremely exemplary. You were the first one to appear in every class and the last one to leave because you offered your help to the teachers who often made you stay longer to clean up the classroom. You also didn’t roam around in the hallways anymore after curfew and didn’t even prank the Slytherins. In fact, there were now other Gryffindors that did more mischief than you.
Your good behavior didn’t manage to lift Jihyo’s mood though. If any, it made it worse. Now that she had finally decided to take action against you, you were playing innocent? Of course, her conscience was immediately telling her to stop her plan and to give you another chance. But her brain strongly opposed to that idea. Your good behavior wasn’t enough to erase all the trouble that you had caused the rest of the year. Therefore, she decided to follow through with her plan, even though her bad conscience heavily weighted down on her.
On the due date of her plan, Jihyo went to the library, tightly clasping a letter in her hand while nervously looking around. Being secretive definitely wasn’t her strong suit. As a prefect, she usually advocated honesty and compliance, so everything that she was doing right now went against her principles. She kept telling herself that it was for the good of Gryffindor, but the little voice in her head kept telling her that she was acting out of pure selfishness and it took all of Jihyo’s strength to muffle it. Arriving in the library, she scanned the students and soon found the perfect protagonists of her scheme. There were some first-year Slytherins roaming the aisles, apparently searching for some books to help them solve their Transfiguration homework. Their school supplies were scattered across a table next to one of the huge windows in the library and Jihyo approached it while skimming her letter one more time.
If you want to learn some curses that they don’t teach at school, come to the Forbidden Forest at midnight.
Sincerely,
Y/N L/N
Jihyo cringed at the primitivity of the letter, but she knew that it would work. Slytherins were overachievers with an affinity for illegal activities. They would be too intrigued by the offer to turn it down. After looking around one last time to make sure that no one was watching her, Jihyo dropped the letter on the table of the first years before scurrying off. Her heart was beating out of her chest and she felt like she was close to passing out. She didn’t know how anyone could enjoy going against the rules; she felt absolutely miserable right now. Not being able to be around people any longer, Jihyo wanted to rush off to her dormitory, but before she could leave the library, someone suddenly called her name.
“Jihyo!”
Jihyo didn’t need a second to realize who the voice belonged to and her body froze instantly. Had you caught her red-handed? For a split second, she considered running away, but before she had the chance to, she could already feel your hand on her shoulder. Reluctantly, she turned around with guilt reflecting in her eyes, ready to get yelled at by you.
“Um...I know it’s a little late, but I wanted to apologize to you.”
You mumbled sheepishly and Jihyo’s jaw dropped. That was definitely not what she had expected to hear from you.
“I know that I’m the reason for a lot of your worries and I also know that I took it too far with the incident with Sejoo two weeks back. I’m really sorry about that and I will try my best to make it up to you and the whole house. I’m proud to be a Gryffindor, so I want to make you guys proud in return too from now on.”
You continued while firmly looking into her eyes as if you wanted to convey the seriousness of your words by allowing her a glance into your soul. A glance that Jihyo didn’t want, because she could feel the complete sincerity of your apology and it made her actions even harder to bear. Why did you need to tell her all this now?
“Um...i-it’s a little late for regret now, don’t you think?”
Jihyo stuttered, trying to sound snappish, but her bad conscience forbade her to harm you even more. You didn’t seem to notice the lack of sharpness in her voice though. Instead, you looked like a beaten puppy who was painfully aware of their misdeeds.
“I know and I’m really sorry. I hope you know that this is nothing personal. I’m really grateful that you’re our prefect, no one would be better at this job than you. I’ve never meant to upset you with my actions.”
You smiled sadly, managing to break Jihyo’s heart. What had she done? You didn’t deserve to be suspended and she didn’t deserve your kind words. What person would set somebody up like this? She needed to get that letter back. Panicked, she looked over your shoulder to the table of the first years, but to her sorrow, the Slytherins were nowhere to be seen. They must have left the library already. Looking back at you, she could see that you were anxiously waiting for some kind of response and she would have loved nothing more than to give you the chance to explain yourself. Maybe the two of you had started off on the wrong foot right from the start. But there was no time to talk right now; she needed to get that letter back first.
“I need to go.”
Jihyo exclaimed breathlessly before running out of the library, leaving you behind with a confused expression on your face. Frantically, she ran down the corridor while scanning the passing people. Yellow, blue and red uniforms passed her by but not a single green one.
“Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck this shit. FUCK! Where are those little brats??”
She cursed under her breath as she reached the stairs. She had no idea where the Slytherin common room was and even if she did follow another Slytherin student there, she would not know the passwords to enter. Desperately, Jihyo grasped her hair and turned around her own axis. What was she supposed to do now? The castle was too big to find the first years. Panicked, she walked up and down the corridor, trying to think of a way to prevent the fatal consequences of her plan from happening. Her only chance was to stop the first years from going to the Forbidden Forest tonight. If she could intercept the Slytherins on their way to the meeting point, they couldn’t get caught by a preofessor and the letter wouldn’t come into play. It was the only way to make this right.
Therefore, Jihyo reluctantly went to the Gryffindor common room where she waited on the couch in front of the chimney like on pins and needles. The hours passed painfully slow, but after a while one fellow student after the other left the common room to go to bed until Jihyo was the only one left. 11:45, the clock face read, causing her to jump off the couch and to stumble to the exit. Under no circumstances, she could let the first years slip through her fingers; she needed to stop them. Being allowed to roam the hallways after curfew as a prefect, Jihyo didn’t worry about running into any professors and headed straight to the entrance hall where she was just about to open the heavy double doors when they suddenly swung open without her help.
“Oh Ms. Park, I’m glad to meet you here. Look who I’ve found loitering outside.”
Mr. Filch croaked smugly while dragging two of the first years from the library by their robes.
Shit.
Jihyo tried to fake a smile, but on the inside she felt like dying. How was she supposed to change the course of these events now?
“What a lucky catch. Thank you for your assistance, Mr. Filch. I can take them to their head of house.”
She tried to pull the first years to her side, but Mr. Filch tightly clasped their uniforms.
“It’s ok. I will accompany you. I want to propose some punishments.”
He giggled ugly before shoving the scared Slytherins forward. Reluctantly, Jihyo followed them to Professor Snape’s office while martyring her brain to find a solution for this hopeless situation. But there didn’t seem to be one. Before she knew it, Mr. Filch already knocked on the dark oak door to Snape’s office which swung open a second later to reveal the irritated-looking professor.
“What?”
He grumbled and Mr. Filch snickered silently.
“I’ve found two of your students outside. After curfew.”
Mr. Filch put exaggerated emphasis on his last sentence, causing Professor Snape to grunt angrily before motioning all of them to come inside. He looked at the two first years in disgust, making Jihyo wonder why he was the head of Slytherin in the first place.
“P-professor Snape, we can explain.”
One of the Slytherins stuttered anxiously before pulling out Jihyo’s letter from his robe, causing her breath to hitch in her throat. She couldn’t just rip it out of the younger student’s hands and destroy it, right? That would be too suspicious. Instead, she had to watch how Snape took the letter and started reading it grimly before his face lit up suddenly.
“Y/N...”
He mumbled, looking happier than Jihyo had ever seen him before.
“Let’s pay Professor McGonagall a visit.”
Before anyone could disagree with him, Snape already scurried out of the room and the rest of them had to follow him wordlessly. Jihyo didn’t know who looked more miserable right now. The two first years or herself. All of them slouched their shoulders and regret was written all over their faces. Filch and Snape on the other hand resembled two Cheshire cats, especially after bolting into Professor McGonagall’s office.
“Y/N has endangered the lives of two first years. I plead for an immediate suspension.”
Professor Snape blurted out before giving the other professor the chance to process this ambush. Jihyo had never been more distressed in her life to have a plan of hers work out just like she had wanted it to.
“I beg your pardon?”
Professor McGonagall asked confused, causing Snape to snicker in amusement.
“These two students here have willfully been lured into a life-threatening situation by Y/N L/N, your student.”
He repeated himself while handing over Jihyo’s letter. Silently, the head of Gryffindor read the harmful words before sighing in desperation.
“That is a severe delinquency indeed...but I’m sure there must be an explanation for this.”
Professor McGonagall was quick to jump to your defense, causing Jihyo to draw hope that was destroyed a second later though when Snape scoffed dismissively.
“Yes, there is an explanation. Y/N L/N is a danger for this school, or have you forgotten about the incident with Sejoo only two weeks back? As a responsible head of house, I can’t tolerate such behavior.”
He narrowed his eyes and Professor McGonagall straightened up defensively.
“I haven’t forgotten about that, but if I may remind you, it was your student who used a slur about Ms. Park’s decent here that caused this whole incident.”
She bit back while pointing at Jihyo who flinched in surprise. What did Professor McGonagall mean by that?
An unsettling feeling started to form in Jihyo’s stomach, and she gulped thickly. What if everything wasn’t like it had seemed?
“That still doesn’t justify the endangerment of fellow students.”
Snape tried to distract from the misdeeds of his own student, leading to a stare down between the two heads of houses. The tension in the room increased with every second until the door of the office suddenly swung open. Inside came Filch accompanied by you, causing Jihyo’s eyes to widen. She hadn’t even noticed that the caretaker had left the room.
“I’ve taken the liberty to bring L/N in.”
He snickered before shoving you into the room.
You ended up standing next to Jihyo and looked at her nervously.
“W-what is this about?”
You stuttered, trying to sound relaxed although a slight trembling in your voice gave away that your heart had to be pounding in your chest.
“You have been caught red-handed. It’s over.”
Snape grinned while pointing at the letter in Professor McGonagall’s hand. Confused, you frowned, obviously not being able to know what he was talking about.
“Why would you lure them into the Forbidden Forest?”
The head of Gryffindor asked in disappointment and you looked at Jihyo for help.
“I did what?”
The confusion and fright in your voice was unmistakable and Jihyo hung her head in shame.
“Quit playing innocent Y/N. We have all the proof we need!”
Snape yelled causing you to flinch in shock. In reflex, Jihyo immediately grabbed your hand and you squeezed it tightly.
“You’re going down for this! You lured two first years into the Forbidden Forest. They could have died if Mr. Filch wouldn’t have found them in time. I will not let this go until you are suspended for the rest of the year.”
With every word more tears started to pool in your eyes and Jihyo couldn’t manage to avert her gaze from you. You looked so helpless right now and all she wanted to do was to save you from this horrible place.
“I-I don’t know what you are talking about. I have never seen this letter before. Why would I Iure first years into the Forbidden Forest??”
Your voice cracked in desperation, but Snape just kept on accusing you aggressively. After all, you had a history of pranking Slytherins. Jihyo couldn’t imagine how wronged you had to feel right now, and she gently rubbed your hand with her thumb, not knowing whether she was trying to calm you or herself down by doing so. She knew that she could end all this by admitting that it had been her who had left the letter, but despite being a Gryffindor, she wasn’t brave enough to do that. How was she supposed to explain it? How would she be supposed to ever look into your eyes again?
“That’s enough. We’ve understood your point, Professor.”
Professor McGonagall eventually ended Snape’s rant before looking at you with a sad face.
“I see how this incident is out of character for you, Y/N. Nevertheless, I have to agree with Professor Snape, the evidence is overwhelming. Therefore...you are hereby suspended until we can prove your innocence.”
Your jaw dropped, hearing these words from the head of Gryffindor and you looked at Jihyo as if she was your last hope. But she wasn’t strong enough to save you. Instead, she flung her arms around your neck and pulled you against her body.
“I’m so sorry.”
She sobbed, not being able to hold back her own tears anymore. Suddenly, however, she could feel how you started to stroke her back soothingly.
“Hey, it’s ok. This is not your fault.”
You tried to calm her, apparently not suspecting her betrayal in the slightest.
“Y/N, let’s go to your dormitory to get your belongings.”
Professor McGonagall asked you and you pulled away. With a light smile tugging on your lips, you reached out and gently wiped away the tears that were streaming down Jihyo’s cheeks.
“Don’t be sad, your job is actually going to be a lot easier from now on. Although I really would have loved to celebrate our victory in the championship together at the end of the year.”
You chuckled sadly to cheer her up before trying to turn around to leave but Jihyo held on to you and crashed you into her body again. She couldn’t bear to see you cheering her up any longer. Not after what she had done.
“It was me. I wrote the letter.”
She whispered into your ear while new tears streamed down her cheeks.
In disbelief, you separated your bodies and stared at her with betrayal written all over your face, causing her to avert her gaze. Her guilt was squeezing all air out of her lungs and she waited impatiently for you to expose her. This charade was unbearable.
“And here I was thinking that you were starting to like me back... What a foolish thought.”
You chuckled, causing Jihyo’s head to snap up. Slowly, you started to back away from her while grabbing your forehead in disbelief and Jihyo shakily reached out for you.
“Y/N...”
The words in Jihyo’s mind were all jumbled and the only thing she could utter was your name. Why weren’t you yelling at her? Why weren’t you standing up for your innocence? Your calmness and the disappointed look in your face was slowly killing her. She needed you to punish her for her betrayal, but you didn’t show the slightest inclination to do so.
“No, it’s ok. Don’t worry about it.”
You mumbled, still seeming to be dazed due to her confession.
“Y/N, what are you doing? You should expose me...”
Jihyo shook your shoulder lightly, but you only smiled at her.
“Yeah you’re probably right. But I won’t. I could never hurt you like that.”
You shrugged while trying to remove her hand from her shoulder but Jihyo only tightened her grasp.
“What are you talking about, Y/N?”
She furrowed her brow in confusion although the blurry picture in her head was slowly starting to get clearer, revealing a truth that she would have preferred to keep ignoring.
“I genuinely hope that you’re happy now, Jihyo. That’s all I ever wanted. You should look out for Sejoo and his gang though. They don’t like to see a muggle-born in such a powerful position and I don’t know what they will do now that I’m not going to be there anymore.”
With that, you removed her hand from your shoulder and walked up to Professor McGonagall who looked at you apologetically before giving you a sign to leave the room. One last time, you turned around and nothing hurt Jihyo more than to see that the sadness in your eyes still couldn’t manage to erase the affection that reflected in them. She had been so blind all this time...
Who would have thought that she had been the selfish one all along?
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