#maybe we complain too much or maybe I just feel to bad to think correctly if it’s really that bad or not 😭

[samkerrworshipper]

hi darling, can i request some soft and sweet aftercare with lucy bronze? just you two being cute together and her joking abt how your legs are shaking/you won’t be able to walk tmr

leg shakes and body aches

lucy bronze x reader

tooth rotting fluff, very light mentions of smut, 1500 words

part 1 (ab riding) <- for my horny bitches xoxo

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen somebody’s legs shake this much, making yourself look like a real pillow princess sweetheart.”

I rolled my eyes effortlessly from my spot tangled up in the bed sheets whilst Lucy walked around the hotel bed, starting to run a bath and finding the articles of clothing we’d discarded and throwing them in a pile in the corner of the room, removing them as a tripping hazard that she knew I was likely to somehow fall on.

“Maybe if you weren’t such a show off Bronze I wouldn’t be so shaky, I mean 7 orgasms is something but 8 is just showing off.”

Lucy smirked at me, toothily, her pearly whites peeking out of her lips.

“You told me that if I won the Euro’s I could have you however I wanted, didn’t you?”

There was so much faux innocence in her voice, like she hadn’t had me cumming six ways to sunday twenty minutes ago.

“Plus, I don’t remember you complaining, in fact I remember something along the lines of ‘Please, Please don’t stop, please Luce let me Cum,’ if I was hearing correctly.”

I gave Lucy a eye roll as she tried to impersonate my voice from when she’d hand me at her mercy, like putty in her hands.

“Keep talking Bronze, you’ll be the one hearing a mouthful of it tomorrow, if you heard it then so did anyone else on this floor.”

Just as I said it I could make out the very faint sound of someone moaning in the background, a few rooms down, but still very much so loud enough that I could hear it.

“You ready for a bath?”

There was sweet Lucy, standing at the foot of the bed waiting for me, waiting to coax me out of the hotel sheets that for some reason felt so much nicer than I knew they really were.

“Luce I genuinely don’t think I can walk.”

She snickered, I knew she was proud of her work, proud that she had me at her fucking mercy completely.

“I’ll carry you if you actually can’t.”

I rolled my eyes at her, pushing myself up in the bed, as hard as it was and swinging my legs over the side of it. We were both still completely naked, not that either of us minded, we’d been dating for four years, we were fairly familiar with each other's bodies.

I put my feet down on the carpet and stood myself up, for a total of three seconds before my knees gave out underneath me. Lucy was very quick to catch me, before even a part of my body could make contact with the hotel floor.

“Told you.”

Lucy rolled her eyes, picking me up bridal style and walking me into the bathroom, gently placing me down in the bathtub. I sighed gently as my body eased into the water, making the body aches and the shakes in my legs relax slightly. Lucy slipped in behind me fairly quickly, not leaving me alone for any longer than the time it took for her to fetch a bottle of water for each of us. My back relaxed against her front before accepting the bottle of water Lucy had handed me and taking a few sips before setting it down next to the tub.

I leant my head back into the crook of Lucy’s neck, tilting my head back and kissing her jaw gently a few times, it was so chiseled, so hardened, so fucking beautiful. Eventually she got the message and tilted her own head down to meet mine, pressing her lips ever so gently to my own and then moving her lips around my face, pressing chaste kisses to my cheeks and forehead.

“You are so fucking perfect.”

Lucy was looking at me with pure adoration, the look that made me fall in love with her in the first place, all those years ago.

“You’re not too bad yourself Miss European Champion.”

I could feel my bones and muscles fully relaxing against her, a fair sign that she’d completely exhausted me. It amazed me how even after a whole football game, hours of partying and then us going at it for a few hours she was still so energised, so upped on endorphins. I supposed that was what winning something so massive did for you, probably explained how Leah and Jill had still been dancing when we’d left, even after being on the dance floor already for hours.

“You do know how proud of you I am right, you were fucking incredible out there, so composed, so good my love.”

Lucy as a player didn’t receive a lot of commendation, she wasn’t kicking goals like Sam Kerr or Alessia, she wasn’t saving goals like Mary, she was moving the ball and keeping other players from scoring but often enough that didn’t get noticed. She also was her biggest enemy when it came to benign her biggest critic, always so fucking hard on herself.

“Thanks baby.”

I could hear the insecurity in the words, Lucy didn’t like being complimented individually, claimed that every game was a team game, and she was right and I loved her for that. But it didn’t hurt to tell her every once in a while that she was doing good herself.

Lucy’s hands migrated their way to my shoulders, ever so gently moving methodically across my skin and muscles, making me relax even further into her.

“You know you're my favourite right?”

Lucy looked at me, an eyebrow rose in slight perplexion.

“Favourite what?”

I smiled up at her, her eyes were so easy to get lost in, so easy to just stare into for hours.

“My favourite person.”

Lucy smiled at me, so genuinely that I could tell it was the kind of smile that made your cheeks hurt from being stretched.

“I love you.”

Lucy’s words were so sure, so positively sure that I couldn’t help but mess with her a little.

“I mean how could you not?”

Lucy rolled her eyes at me, slapping me lightly over the head.

“You’re a dork.”

“I love you too,”

Lucy smiled very faintly at my words,

“And I fall in love with you even more every single day.”

Lucy couldn’t even try to contain the shit eating grin that made its way across her face, her cheeks blushing bright pink and her eyes sparkling brightly, like there were stars in them.

“Now, as much as I love sitting here with you, I think that if we stay in much longer we're both going to turn into prunes and if we get out I can give you cuddles in bed.”

The last bit of her sentence was enough to convince me, I nodded eagerly at Lucy and watched joyfully as she hoisted herself out of the bath, wrapping herself up in a towel before grabbing a secondary one for me and picking me up out of the bath, draping the towel over my body, drying down my body before lifting me back up and carrying me back out to our room. She placed me very gently down on the bed before working at drying herself off and then following me into the sheets.

I was quick to throw myself into her arms, revelling in the warmth and comfort that her two arms provided, tangling myself up in Lucy’s body and just enjoying her laugh as I positioned her exactly how I wanted her.

“My love.”

My eyes darted up to meet hers, she’d flicked the lights off somewhere along the way, so it took me a few seconds to find her eyes in the darkness but once they did I felt a part of myself relax just a little bit more.

“It’s okay.”

Somehow her words were enough, I stopped my fussing, letting her very gently drape her arms around my hips and back, the subtlety of her touches being absolutely everything that I needed to assure me of her words. I could feel my heart pounding softly against my ribs, as I let myself fully relax against Lucy’s chest, I could feel her own heart beat, beating steadily against the skin of my back.

“I love you Luce.”

“I love you too y/n.”

[allsadnshit]

Hello Izzie, I hope you don’t mind me asking this, but do you have some tips and tricks how to reconnect with your body ? You seem like you got it mastered, understanding all of your urges, translating your body’s hidden messages correctly .. I’ve been disconnected for so many years and all of my “ knowledge “ of this seems to be just theoretical. How do I make a home in my own body ? What worked the most for you ?

Thank you :)

Huge admirer of your writing over here

definitely getting sober and working out! they have really changed my life and my relationship to my body. I think theres so many different reasons we get disconnected from our bodies and I honestly feel like a lot of modern society demands and promotes it so it's really important to be able to slow down and recognize what in life pushes that option the most. I think coping through substance is pretty obviously taking you out of your body and was a huge contributor to my own panic attacks and inability to have a healthy relationship to myself. I see a lot of people making excuses for stuff like smoking weed and calling it like "not a drug" or chill or whatever and maybe that was true back before it was government regulated - but even at that I really think letting those things become a habit will destroy any of the positive benefits it can have and once you have an addiction you can't really rewrite your relationship to it.

being sober helped me to recognize what overwhelmed me, what made me clench, or even things we don't think about like overeating when high and how much that will fuck up your digestion even if it's "healthy" food because too much of anything is hard on the body and once your gut is scrambled it will ruin your hormones, your moods, and your cognitive function! people hate to hear it but also complain about mystery chronic conditions and its def in there.

working out and not just doing it for the glamour but actually like building stamina and strength naturally without shitty pre work out protein shake bullshit will literally blow your mind and your relationship to your body! it blew mine! I never thought I'd be able to be physically active again after all my different chronic diagnosis and not a single doctor encouraged me to do anything except surgery or medication but it turns out the classics are a classic for a reason! moving your body is sacred and the quickest way to tune back into it! plus it will help your hormones get back into rhythm if they have been messed up by previous medication or bad health habits

sending u love <3 cherish your body!!!!

[tilthedayidice]

Hey welcome back to my BG3 Hot Takes

While I have your attention, here's a cool site to help Palestine, all you gotta do is click it daily.

This session was inspired by @lipsie, gettin me ttalkin way too much. Yes I am aware that the tadpole changes things, and they have to make it balanced for the game blah blah blah- let a bitch complain.

Screenshots sourced from the Baldur's Gate 3 Wiki

Gale is the only character I feel is spec'd correctly, He's smart but fiuckin stupid, he has autism rizz, mam could not lift any box you asked him to, the only reason his constitution is 13 is because he's been dealing with the Orb and he's used to it by now.

Karlach should start with 20 strength and you CANNOT convince me otherwise, her charisma should be higher also, she's a ball of sunshine and could put the fear of god into anyone, and the line "Gods I wanna ride you til you see stars" will never leave my brain. Give this bitch a 15. She do be a little dumb I'll give you that.

Shadowheart is just funny to me, How can her wisdom be a 17 when she's been cloistered away for so long? Her wisdom is only a 17 in ONE SPECIFIC SUBJECT, a subject where she's forced to give up her memories. Memories are where we get our wisdom. Wisdom is gained through lived experiences, I'd give you the 17 for endgame Shart, but not start of game Shart. I'll take the 8 CHA cause she's a bitch (said with love, me too babe) but she knows enough to get what and where she wants so I think we should nudge it up to like 10.

Lae'zel.... I think it's unfair to put Lae'zel's intelligence at 10. Her wisdom being low, yeah i get that she's been cloistered away in a society that believes its the only way, it's all she knows. But intelligence? No. She might know much about Faeruns culture and people, but she knows EVERYTHING about the stars. And there's far more of that than there will ever be of Faerun. She's the funniest person we know, give her 9 CHA.

Wyll my beloved, do you airbrush those abs on? Do you wake up every morning and contour them? I DON'T BELIEVE YOU DO!!!!!!!!! SO WHO'S THE ASS WHO DECIDED YOUR STRENGHT WAS A FUCKIN 8??????? THE BLADE OF FRONTIERS SHOULD HAVE AT LEAST A 13. He deserve a 15 but I know they won't give it to him. Lipsie and I were talking about him and they're right, WHEN WE DUMP THE BITCH HE SHOULD RESPEC INTO BARD.

Astarion..... oh Astarion.... you're such a disaster. Such a wet cat of a man. Such a pathetic little mew mew. I shit on him a lot, but I do really love his character and development lol. LESS STR MAKE HIM WEAK, he has been starved and living off rats and shame, he can have his measly 8 AFTER he drinks... uh "Thinking" Blood. His CHA being 10 is perfect actually no notes. I personally think his actual INT should be lower, not too much lower, maybe 11/12, I knooooow he was a magistrate, but you can't tell me he's not giving himbo... no what was that word on the meme graph? Himbim? Himbim.

Halsin.......... 10 STR? 10?!?!?!?! You built him LIKE THAT and give him 10 STR?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!? What in the nine hells...... Weaker than Karlach of course, but 10????? Give that man 15 at least 8 INT???????????? 8???????? LARIAN WHY DO YOU HATE HIM???? Is it because he isn't Gale? Mans has been studying the mindflayers on his own, he's been studying the shadow curse... on his own. HE'S A MASTER HEALER?!?!?! AN ARCHDRUID?!?!?!?!?!?!? That takes time, study, and dedication. You wanna assign him himbo so bad. He's just a whole well rounded man with autism,. (Not a dig on himbos, quite literally my favorite genre of Man). This is just 'cause he fucks isn't it.

Minthara she's so much smarter than Larian gives her credit for. While I agree with the WIS, that's more a product of being so closed off, Her INT is much higher. I'd give her a 14? She cunning, just because it's used for Evil deeds doesn't mean she hasn't been she hasn't put a lot of thought into her work. She lived in Menzoberranzan for Gods' sake. She had to be smart or be killed?!? She's said so on multiple occasions! Just because she's Evil aligned doesn't mean she not smart. (She's just as smart as our average Bear according to Larian)

Minsc...... First off let me say that I love that they chose this image. A Bad Bitch. Anyways, anyone who doesn't find that dumb happy face charming is either lying or literally has a stick up their ass.... 12 CHA. Also why is he so weak? I know he isn't like actually weak... but mans chunked that mimic? Let him have 14.

Jaheira I'll give you the 10 STR, she's complained about her knees like three times in my most recent session. 8 INT? So what I'm getting here.... is anyone not an origin character is just baseline 8? Lazy. Especially considering she was ALREADY GIVEN STATS IN TWO PREVIOUS GAMES. In both BG1 and BG2 she has an intelligence of 10, and if anything she's only gotten smarter over time. I wasn't gonna do this... but left is 1 right is 2.

15, 14, 17, 10, 14, 15, and 15, 17, 17, 10, 14, 15

Make it make sense. I know she's old at this point, but in my game she killed Sarevok again so idk man.

Rip me apart in the notes ;)

But do it nicely...

[ihopesocomic]

I think what a lot of people who have issues with you (aside from the youtube lion show stans) is that you dont baby people

People ask for obvious spoilers and you just say "we'll see!" (Unless its been asked several times in which case you explain that)

People try to push for bigotry to be in your comic which you wont stand for

People refuse to actually read the comic and want it explained and you have to put your foot down and tell them to read the comic

Ect ect ect ive never seen you guys get unreasonable with any messages, angry? Short? Sure some of the anons you get are like "why is hope have 3 legs?" Its completely understandable to be angry at messages like that

Yea that's pretty much the vibe we get too tbh. But we're not gonna apologize for having standards and we're not going to change how we present ourselves if it means putting in extra mental energy to be overly polite to bad faith actors or people who just simply ignore what we put out unless its addressing them personally.

You mentioning the spoilers incident is interesting because the person who brought that up would later state that spoilers weren't their issue at all, just us being "condescending" because they made the personal choice to read our neutral responses as such. Or us using 'lol' whenever we indicate we're being light hearted. Because not everybody who uses 'lol' is being snarky or rude.

Ultimately, being given the benefit of the doubt would go a long way instead of people automatically assuming we're being nasty or "unprofessional" because of things like 'they criticized something I enjoy" or "Well, I didn't like that they weren't bowled over by an ask I sent two years ago' or just anything that happened years ago LOL

Anyway. Some people may be fine with spoiling the whole story of their project, but not us. We're having a lot of fun keeping people guessing, especially if they guess correctly and their theory is proven in a future chapter. We do big high fives when that happens lol

The people who outright demand inclusion of bigotry are especially confusing because at best its people thinking our one little comic that's not-that-popular-actually constitutes as erasure of the queer/disabled struggle. And at worst it's people who somehow can't find value in entertainment unless it's misery porn. And both of these instances they claim the existence of IHS in its current form takes away from the countless already-existing content that covers both, or somehow shames people for including it in their own story when we've never said such a thing. Anything we've said either applies to us personally or we're criticizing mainstream media that takes our experiences and makes them palatable to a mainstream audience. (At it's funniest it's nerd fans who criticize our comic for being a knock-off of MP while in the same breath complain that it's not doing the same thing as MP)

And an insincere sorry in advance to people who want us to spoon-feed them information in the comic. I was under the impression that when you saw a web comic, you had intentions on reading it. Heck, we have a dub now, you don't even have to read anymore technically. But I value my time too much to explain every single detail that may go missed in a chapter. Some stuff we feel confident in our readers piecing together on their own because we respect their intelligence, and most times there's no incorrect conclusion to arrive to because leaving some things up to interpretation is better than over explaining it. But maybe I'm just a meanie. - Cat

[teamdarkweek]

Let us consult the text of origin together:

My thoughts under the cut, but you can just enjoy the video.

General observations:

Let us never forget Rouge's wings are pink here. In sa2 they were black, they have since been purple. I think it's possible she covers her wings in some kind of think fabric or latex to match her outfits and maybe protect her - but primarily for the matchy matchy

In the shiny toy-ish style of heroes, Omega looks incredible. He looks so much better than everyone else.

Team Dark take in turns to be the most determined; it genuinely feels to me like they all do want this. Nobody is just in it for the loyalty or ride.

Team Dark should get to fight Team Rose. I would love them to duke it out with the Girl Scout commander and his two most loyal members.

Opening Cutscene:

First let us appreciate: Rouge just broke in to Eggman's again. Iirc she inserts herself into SA2 basically the same way. Plot driving queen.

It is odd to me that Rouge had no idea what she was finding, but did know the code. This 'happening upon' Shadow has always seemed strange to me and I am suspicious of it. It seems to me they might have wanted her to be looking for him, but bottled it at the last chance. Especially because she doesn't seem to be working for GUN here, this is just very convenient.

Omega is legitimately scary when he's first introduced, with a lot of the hallmarks of classic horror monsters in this first sighting of him (the close ups, the prey-through-predators eyes shot, all the action shots to keep you confused, minimal speaking etc.. I have no statement on this, it's just neat.

It must be quite a traumatising thing to wake up to, but Shadow takes little time to react. I really like that he doesn't recognize his name when Rouge says it.

It is weird to me Rouge just sits in shock at being shot. Was she not expecting a trap? Perhaps she got hit in the head or something?

Omega's aiming just before Rouge splits them up is so funny. I said I wouldn't use screenshots so this post doesn't become too slow to load but look at this:

His hands just circle around wildly. Shadow is going straight for you. Either you're not aiming for him or you're not calibrated correctly my love.

Rouge's exhausted and shocked face is adorable and I love it so so so much. This is peak Rouge IMO

The fact we see Eggman's base trashed - loudly trashed - and he does nothing about it could be a first nod at his current predicament we see in the Chaotix story, but I may be reaching.

I love the start of the chorus as they're coming to an understanding. I love This Machine, maybe more than I love my boyfriend but not more than I love my cat. It's so up there though.

Rouge bounced Shadow off Imega when she scooped him over and he rebounds into a defensive stance. No notes just cute.

Shadow's eye roll as she makes them all put hands together. You just woke up how are you so sassy? Amazing. No notes.

The actual skipped conversation must have been quite short, since Shadow knows nothing and Omega is a new robot, but I hope it included Omega inteoducing himself at least a bit. They don't say his name in this cutscene, or Rouge's but the audience probably knows her. Its just odd to me because I feel like team sonic say eachothers name a lot, but my memory may be faulty.

Seaside Hill + Ocean Palace + Egg Hawk

"Immediate destruction if distracted." Omega fully threatens to kill them if they don't work hard enough. I am not complaining, but he is a scary boy and we should remember this.

We should have known this wasn't Eggman because he reacts to Omega (an obvious E series robot) and not Shadow (a literal living weapon he had had locked away that should not be walking around). But me personally was a dumb kid who was too bad at video games to get to play team darks story before I had to go home so here we are.

Grand Metropolis + Power Plant + TC

Rouge has the least reason to be targetting Eggman, but she is quite determined here. I would suppose it is on behalf of Shadow, since she doesn't know Omega that well to be heart broken for his plight. It's nice to see that she too expresses her sentiment by violence, something often reserved in fanon for Omega and arguably Shadow.

Further to the above: she starts a fight with Team Chaotix literally and only because she is in a fighty mood. They were fr walking away, minding their own business. I also think that Espio's assumption that they might have it in for the client is valid, since they've probably been jumped by enemies of clients before. Rouge is literally just on a warpath and mad at the world. Iconic of her.

Casino Park + Bingo Highway + Robot Carnival

I do wonder what Rouge was wondering. If she was wrong, perhaps? Or what the Chaotix were doing? She couldn't suspect they're working for Eggman, could she?

Omega works in metres because he is no fool

Shadow is actually very calm talking to Eggman here. It suggests that either Rouge has not filled him in on anything much about Eggman, and/or he wants to learn for himself and isn't taking her and Omega's hatred at face value. This may make him seem a bit dozy here, but I actually think it's a sign of how untrusting he is, and with good reason. I have often seen the take that Rouge should have told him what's going on, but I propose that it is possible she told him some, he didn't believe her easily, and so she stopped telling him before the crazier stuff, because he'd never believe that. A bit of a leap I know.

Rail Canyon + Bullet Station + Egg Albatross:

This is the first time I think Shadow seems really determined. I propose it's because Eggman snubbed and disregarded him, and that is literally a tortuable offense. Joking aside, it's nice to hear the change in his voice now he's more set on his target.

Rouge is less sure of herself now. Tbh, it's probably been a really stressful day for her. She may need a rest.

Shadow offering Omega his revenge instead of fighting him for it is a nice touch. What a good team player!

Omega's shaking fist at the fake Eggman gets me. I love it. It's so ott and goofy but also a great way to communicate with his limited face.

The Shadow Android scene is actually quite frightening, like with Omega's introduction it has a little touch of horror. Imagine how you'd feel, if it were my android clone I would feel pretty nauseous and scared.

'Ultimate Life Form Data' - Metal answers the question of 'is Shadow a Robot?' As soon as it was asked, but nobody has ever listened to Metal Sonic about anything, and they aren't about to start today 🥰❤️. But did Metal know what Shadow was? We presume it had seen the Shandroids, and knew they weren't him, otherwise Metal would have just copied one of them.

(Frog Forest + Lost Jungle) + TS

"Talk about being stubborn and full of surprises" is so uncalled for from Shadow's perspective. He's never met this guy, how dare he read him like that.

This fight is so stupid, I almost believe it's just them being friendly. You know Sonic's pretty freaked out at seeing Shadow again, but I have had kittens before and sometimes they just have to show their excitement with biting. I think this might be that? Because Rouge left no particularly bad blood with Sonic. Now if she and Knuckles started it, I would understand the hostility, but Shadow and Sonic totally start this one.

Do you think Sonic felt bad that he went straight in to fight Shadow when Shadow fully just had no facts in his head to help him make good choices? I'd feel bad lol.

Hang Castle + Mystic Mansion + Robot Storm

Shadow tefuses to answer Rouge's question then proceeds to loudly answer it to himself with her just metres away. Keep being you, Shadow.

I like that they refer to Omega to ask if it's the real one, even though he can't - nice team trust moment.

Egg Fleet + Final Fortress + Egg Emperor

'Even if I'm not real - I'm still the Ultimate Life Form' resolving Shadow the Hedgehog (2005) before it even begins. In seriousness, it's quite a contradictory statement, probably because he doesn't know much about what that means. Has Rouge told him? We haven't seen someone explain that in the cutscenes, so I presume so.

Rouge immediately turning away from Eggman's body is so funny to me. 'K cool bye'

The first time I'd forgiven her not seeing that it was clearly Shadow in the goo. But Rouge, come on now. Why would they all be the exact same alien goo container with a spiky starshaped thing in them? You have seen Shadow Android. This shock is not necessary.

Why is there not enough goo to cover the ears? They can hear you guys.

'Hey Omega, did I ever tell you that Shadow is a Robot? And, well, nevermind - good luck." ARE YOU TRYING TO GET HIM KILLED? I also have to presume she genuinely believes this here. It's such a weird line.

Omega is so smart. He has been dumbed down of late, but he's not stupid anywhere here. It is perfectly reasonable to assume that the one kept separately with it's own guard robot is at least more important than all these mass stored without an E unit dedicated to protecting it.

"Some things never change, do they?" How would you know? Did she tell you this? That's such a funny portrait of herself for Rouge to paint. Forever unsuccessfully trying to steal chaos and master emeralds, generally predisposed to being rude and disobedient? Or did he just observe that himself.

They leave it off like Omega may not be a recurring character from here. I wonder if they weren't sure if he'd be liked, since in SA2 they killed off a character that ended up being the most popular thing they'd made since the series began. Nobody is competing with Shadow's cult fanbase, but I wish more people like me loved big robot boy.

[twilightguardian]

Been a while. Lilith's been too preoccupied with her crush on Critter to pay attention to Fixing all that much :(

We all love watching Lilith make a fool of herself. It's all in good fun, and she never fails to get a chuckle out of us in the Tundra.

Outside of that one person who tried talking to her about it. Maybe I'll get to that, too. This review is incredibly short for a video that's 30 minutes long. That's because she skips over anything she can't find to complain about and then says 'nothing happens!' as though shutting your eyes and plugging your ears while the video plays until near the end is proof you're right. At least people who have things to complain about the show actually pay attention to what's going on, even if the conclusions they come to aren't ones you agree with. But it goes to show Lilith doesn't pay attention to things she watches, she likes the show for the politics of it, not because it's good. She criticizes FRWBY not because it's bad, but because it threatens what she thinks is a feminist show, despite M&K saying they don't view the show that way.

Of course she'd say it's garbage because Lilith could never admit that a project she's been shitting on for years just to 'get back at the haters' is actually good. The thing that makes Lilith's reviews terrible is that she looks for things deliberately to complain about, whether it's necessary or not just to 'get back at' people she dislikes.

One could argue she's attempting to mimic what people who are critical of the show do, but it's not comparable. The biggest difference is that she's an individual mimicking hundreds of people; people who have different gripes with the show that another individual who takes issue with it doesn't necessarily agree with. But in her infinite big galaxy-brained wisdom she lumps everyone she disagrees with as a single individual and decides to take it out on a particular project just because it's more popular than others. Why is it more popular than others? Because Raymond has taken a lot of care to try and keep events of the story as close as possible.

But she dislikes any changes he makes to his rewrite as bad based on nothing other than it's not written by Miles and Kerry then claims Raymond can't write but never actually explains why. 'This thing bad, therefore bad writing end of story'.

Now, it's not unique to Lilith, or the anti-rwde crowd. She falls into the pitfall of a wider group of people who rant about the things that upset them, which is fine. But she, and some of them, pose their rants as legitimate critique or criticism, and that's not what critique is. And unlike what Seeker thinks is legitimate critique, you don't need to compliment something, either. Showing what is done correctly and why, or otherwise showing how something done wrong could be done better after explaining why it's bad is legitimate critique. I'd argue this is more effective than the compliment sandwich method.

Showing how it could be better is what Raymond does with Fixing. Not make it perfect, but make it better. And there's plenty of legitimate criticism to be levied against Fixing, though many that I've seen is more personal preference for what they'd rather see in a rewrite, rather than criticizing Fixing as it is. Personally, I think that's reductive. It's arguing something tangential, rather than what is.

A lot of RWBY fans accuse critical fans of doing the same to RWBY, though I don't think it's the same. For example, those who criticize Volume 8's fumbles do talk about the situation being as it is, and how it could have been tightened up or expanded. There are people who don't feel Ironwood's fall to antagonism was justified, and don't think that's what should have happened at all. These are two different stances, even if not mutually exclusive. One is critiquing the story as it is and the quality of how it was executed, and one is more broadly critiquing the concept as a whole. While neither are necessarily wrong, if one is looking at what could be done to fix Ironwood's story as it is intended to be, only the former is valid as a form of critique.

Why is this?

Because we're looking at it from the intents of the writers. It might be a better story overall if major changes X, Y and Z changes take place, but what is the intent of the writers? Vernal's one of the poster children for Fixing's changes, and her role was to be Raven's right-hand woman and to be a red herring for Raven being the maiden. Then she dies. Nothing about any of this has changed in Fixing RWBY, so Raymond has kept the integrity of the core intent while tweaking things to make the story more compelling and interconnected with the characters Vernal is meant to be tied to.

Whether or not this change is one that someone personally likes isn't the same question as whether or not it makes the story more compelling as a whole. That requires thinking outside of one's personal tastes, and that's hard to do for some people.

Lilith thinks a prepubescent girl is a woman.

Yes. This is totally a fully grown person by the definition of what a woman is.

Roman breathes in an episode and Lilith takes that as Roman taking over the entire episode. It's so pathetic, but also really funny. Of course many people aren't going to watch the episode so she can say whatever lies she wants and people will believe her if she sees she's on the correct "side" of the issue.

We don't even see Roman until the 4:44 mark. Up until then it's been Ruby and Qrow. Even then, the scene is a Yang and Blake scene. The only thing Roman is doing is tending to the fire. It could be why she ignores these scenes, because she actually thinks they're fine, but she can't let anyone know that she enjoys something about Fixing.

Roman doesn't appear again until the 11:10 minute mark because the Yang and Blake scene continued until then, with Yang informing everyone she saw "Adam", putting everyone on high alert. He complains they're out in the cold, then gets told to go look for Maria and Qrow. We go back to the girls and by this time it's the halfway mark. Roman has barely done anything all episode. Wow. Such a Roman-centric episode!

Also, she's wrong about Roman being the only one to face his past. Qrow faces his past with Summer. Ruby and Weiss both talk about their histories with their parental figures (Qrow and Willow, respectively) and Yang and Blake both have a discussion about Adam and Beacon. It's entirely Lilith's fault she doesn't pay attention and then complains that things are bad. It doesn't make her a brave RWBY white knight fighting the good fight defending fictional women because how dare people treat the main characters like main characters, it makes her look like a moron.

You gotta wonder if it's talentless hack energy to edit a work, or talentless hack energy to be a writer and not recognize any hallmark of what makes writing good outside of socio-political bench stones.

Yes, and we also see this in Fixing RWBY as well. More, in fact, as in canon we only see Mr. and Mrs. Brunswick expired in their beds. But in Fixing we also see two other bodies outside of the Huntsman in the well. Is that necessary? No, but it's good detective work on Maria's part to do more than just sit in her grandma chair by the fire. It makes her look like a competent huntress who knows how to do her job.

The second half to this paragraph, but I want to highlight that one of her big complaints here is that we don't get the explanation at the end of the episode like canon.

There's something to be said about treating your audience like they're actually intelligent and not feeding them exposition, but rather allow them to experience what they need to know through the actions happening in the episode. Personally, I don't believe that the episode requires knowledge of the original episode to understand what's going on. Plus, with this episode being as horror-themed as it is, the most frightening thing is the unknown. The parts of the story you don't get or understand.

Though with a question either in the Tundra or in the comments section, I can't remember, it's said that we'll get the information in the next episode. After all, they haven't left the farm yet. It's not like the next episode starts and they'll be in Argus and it'll never be talked about again. But she keeps acting like that's the case and she keeps being proven wrong and she just ignores it.

Keep in mind she's shitting on a reactor. Someone who talks about their feelings in the immediate and who has always given the show the benefit of doubt that things will happen later on in the season, and it's only when it's done does he finalize his thoughts. Lilith doesn't do the same if my hypothesis of her trolling by poorly mimicking something she fundamentally doesn't understand is true.

Bullshit. They found the Brunswick mummies last episode and more this episode.

Everyone also had a hard time waking up at the beginning of the episode. It's more subtle than in the show proper, but subtle doesn't mean it's not there. I wonder if Lilith knows what subtlety is. I only know she watches children's media primarily based on her tumblr and she writes an original story meant for a child audience, yet has adults as main characters. I've been too busy to look at the contents of her novels to see if it feels like it's meant for an Adult audience or if it's even YA. If the anime she primarily watches could be graded in book terms than shows like Pretty Cure fall under middle grade. She complains about shows like Madoka, which would be considered YA, so I suspect she just dislikes stories meant for an older audience, which is fine. But the younger a demographic something is meant for the more blunt and blatant it's meant to be. It's not bad writing, it's different writing. Though RWBY is meant to be for a teenage audience but it's somewhat written like it's for little kids. At least RWBY doesn't have the Adult Cartoon mentality where the writers think that swearing once in a while makes the story mature. Handling mature storylines poorly is at least better than that.

Yes, they slept for the night and then everyone felt the effects of the apathy just like in the show. She's complaining that something didn't happen when it did, she just doesn't pay attention because she wants to whine and complain and act like she's being a Critic.

I already talked about what she bolds so I'm just going to skip over it.

Lilith admits she's incapable of inference based on context clues. We didn't need Maria expositing about the apathy at the end of the story to know they cause you to lose motivation for anything. The show told us through rare good storytelling. Raymond merely added to it by lengthening it out, and adding another creepy grimm on top of it. Sure, we learned how the apathy got down there in the first place, but that wasn't really necessary. Considering how large that well system is, it's not illogical to think some apathy crawled in there while it was being built and got trapped when the final brick was placed. It's something you can guess from just the environment and how they were found there. But there will be an explanation of sorts next week, so we'll see how Fixing handles it.

Personally, I think it's unnecessary, but I hold off judgment until I see it.

As I said, none of this is necessary information when it comes to horror. We don't need to know the name of the apathy in the show, and M&K are more than happy to keep things to Q&As. Plenty of shows and other media don't name things on screen, but it will be in interviews or in artbooks. Because it's not important.

And like I said before, a lot of what makes for good horror is about the lack of information. Fear of the unknown. That's why I'm not sure we need an explanation at all. They're grimm, that's all we need to really know. What does knowing their name give us? It doesn't ruin anything per se, but I feel like it deflates the tone a little to have a diary read to us with an encyclopedia about everything we need to know about it and a long history in detail about how they got there. It was a little convoluted, and if I'm honest, really stupid.

Raymond is a something now lol

I'll give Lilith the benefit of doubt that she just made a typo.

And yeah. I'm sure there are plenty of fans of RWBY who are better writers than the writers of RWBY. There are lots of people who are better writers than M&K. And there are a lot of writers who are worse. Just because they won the lottery on getting themselves a writing position doesn't mean they got the position because they were good writers. They just knew how to write, no one cared for the quality. Plus, just because they know how to write some things, doesn't mean they know how to write other things. They're good at shorter, condensed stories, not long spanning epics like they're trying to write with RWBY.

I can't be the only one here to notice she's complaining that Raymond isn't telling her about what happens, ignoring what is being shown to us with the visuals and the narrative clues, yet claims he is breaking show-don't-tell.

It's a cute little catchphrase, but I've noticed a lot of people don't really know what it even means. Especially not when her complaint has been that he doesn't tell us anything. Tell tell tell. She wants tell, when Raymond is showing. This is why I think she doesn't know what she's talking about.

lmao

[kebriones]

are you against mythology retellings? if yes, would you mind telling me why? (in my opinion they are harmless and each one of them adds something new to the ‘source material’) just asking since i’ve seen a lot of classicists harassing people just minding their business and having fun 💀

-Absolutely not at all! I came very near to spending all my savings to go watch hadestown a couple years back, and at the very beginning I even enjoyed lore olympous (the story lost me at some point).

-Do I think they're harmless? No story is harmless and all of them are. It depends on what you consider harm.

-I don't think they add to the source material. If we're talking about ancient greek mythology specifically, it's been dead and burried for centuries. Whatever new is created, is a modern thing and seperate, in my opinion.

-However, it is the very nature of mythology, that people are meant to make their own stories inside it freely. If anything, I enjoy retellings, and even more than retellings I absolutely love the taking of characters (heroes gods, whatever) and making completely new stories with them. "retellings" as a concept can fall into the trap of trying to fix myths, to make them more palatable and enjoyable to a modern audience, which is what rubs me the wrong way.

-But there's no storytelling police so that's up to me to avoid reading those stories of course. Others may enjoy them, and not everyone has to care about the historical contexts or original messages of specific myths. I certainly think there are benefits to it and personally I find it adds to the enjoyment , but each person enjoys different things. I have spent many years stewing in my overprotective feelings towards ancient greek mythology but recently I decided I just want people to have a nice time. I'm also trying to teach myself to understand that other people are completely different to me, so if I find somethign sickeningly bad and others like it, that's just how subjective things work. So I might complain, half-jokingly always, about stuff but it's just to blow off steam and deep down i'm chill about everything.

I specifically don't like what I've heard about the song of achilles, plus I'm extremely, extremely biased when it comes to the iliad, so I am very picky about retellings for that specific part of mythology. the iliad has been my baby since I was very young and it's the one thing I allow myself to be completely crazy over, so when I say I cannot get through the movie troy because it's too painful, I 100% mean it. if you enjoy it, that's great. I will complain and bitch about it forever. I slept with that book under my pillow for my entire childhood and to have some randos come and spend millions to butcher it and drag its corpse like achilles dragged hector, for the whole world to see is too much.

As a last point. I think sometimes with retellings, especially of ancient greek mythology, we're a bit too sensitive because it has been too oftenly taken out of its cultural context and used willy-nilly to tell stories that reflect nothing greek, be it modern or ancient. It is a flashy topic for people to use however they want, and it's been changed to fit western cultures so so much, that I wish people would just leave it alone. Ancient greek mythology isn't about flashy god powers, it's about the values and experiences of a culture (or more correctly, multiple cultures), whether those align with modern ones or not, but when "retellings" are first and foremost made to be sold as products, the stories have to be altered to hell, to be nice and tame for the audience, to sell well. Which is a whole other discussion.

so yeah that's why I prefer all-new stories that maybe use mythological characters, over straight up retellings. But, as most ancient greek myths were very regional, had a million variations of which we know a tiny amount of, and were told and made for a long period of time, I don't think that retellings now are in any way inherently bad. But all the nice marble aesthetics (tm) and hot dudes will not fix a bad story, is what I wish people understood. Also I wish they didn't think they know or even claim to like the mythology from having read only retellings.

Anyways I am not a classicist, I am a fine arts student, so I might be saying absolute nonsense, my brain is too fried. on the other hand, i am born and raised in greece, and I have grown up with these myths everywhere around me and I really like them, so I have a lot of feelings about them, but that doesn't really mean anything. And I haven't noticed much harassing going on (lots of complaining, but that's the lifeblood of the internet) but then again I'm here on tmblr only a very short time. That all said, I absolutely do not condone harassing people for what they enjoy, especially for things that can only "harm" the person doing it, like reading stories.

[revivemyreverie]

Chapter 11

Roostia: A park potluck… for the orphanage?

Zackery: Yep! And you don’t need to worry about the materials or games or anything like that!

Winston: I called Saturn, our dorm leader is gonna send some of Zackery’s drone along with the stuff we used for a party competition a few weeks ago! It’ll be here by nightfall!

Roostia: Well, you’ve certainly created quite the plan. But I do have a complaint-

Zackery: Eh?! What’s there to complain about??? Not only are we giving grown ups the chance to think about adoption, but we’re even using one of our biggest tents so the rain can’t affect the area whatsoever!!! And Mayor Kappel can’t do anything about it since it’s a neighborhood event! It’s a perfect plan!

Roostia: That’s not what I’m complaining about, I find your concept to be simply, well, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious, in fact. What I’m annoyed about is that you decided to present this to me while covered in mud!

Zackery: Oh! Haha… we’ll get cleaned up! 

After the group washes their clothes and themselves, you all begin writing down the potluck’s necessities. Zackery’s siblings offer assistance, with Gale suggesting only the best games that both adults and kids can enjoy alike. In the doorway, the older residents look on.

Roostia: Not going to join your classmates?

Pat: No way, they’re way too messy to join with their ideas running around like this.

Roostia: So you think the idea is a bad one?

Pat: Not at all, it’s in the realms of reality and does have the potential to bring in an older market, just as Zackery says. I just don’t like looking at plans until they’re correctly cleaned up.

Roostia: I see, I see. Any ideas of your own, then?

Pat: …Hm, not for the potluck itself, but I do have an idea of the best person to invite. 

Roostia: Then you best get on with it, just make sure you don’t summon a police officer while you do.

Gale: Why don’t we have an activity for kite-flying? 

Zackery: In this kind of weather? Maybe if we cleared up all the crummy air out of the pipes and in the sky, haha!

Winston: Well I think it’s a pretty swell idea. Plus, who knows! Maybe the skies will get cleared up one day. 

Once done with their work, and Pat’s reorganizing of the event, everyone gets to work fairly quickly. Toytoriya’s method of mail does not disappoint, and the pieces for the event come right as the sun falls below the horizon. 

Gale: Can we make the posters?? I think my great creative skills are a great tool!

Winston: Go for it! We got spare markers if you need ‘em!

Gale: Hahaha! I won’t be disappointed! I’ll draw something cool like the dragon Mom put on the fridge!

Winston: That’s a dragon? I thought it was a horse…

Zackery: A horse?! You told me it was a dog!

Gale: S-shut up!!! It’s a dragon named Dog!

As the children work on multiple designs for the soon-to-be distributed posters, the first years begin working on the main attractions. You help Winston sew the tent, and Grim and Zackery begin work on the mini coaster. Zackery’s drones, as always, help with much of the bulk work.

Before you knew it, the event was all finished, and posters ready to be hung. As the sun sets on the 2nd to last day of your vacation, you can’t shake off the feeling that something bigger than the fair is approaching…

TBC

[gaymer-hag-stan]

Like with the first semi, here are my thoughts on the second one after all's been said and done

1. Denmark 🇩🇰 - Emabrassing

2. Armenia 🇦🇲 - My girl SLAYED! I heard that she was gonna have a dance break from wiwibloggs and I wasn't sure if it was gonna fit but it did! They should have gone less ham on the smoke effects though because she was literally lost in it for a few seconds, hope they sort this out

3. Romania 🇷🇴 - I don't like the rearranged version and the staging was embarrassing, but he's still young so I think he's gonna find his way eventually

4. Estonia 🇪🇪 - Maybe it's because I'm so used to the studio version or maybe she was anxious but I kinda expected more? She wasn't bad or anything like that, I just know that she can sing even better and I hope she brings it to the final

5. Belgium 🇧🇪 - YEEEES! I was absolutely sure he was a qualifier the moment he stepped on that stage. Like I said yesterday, Gustaph's journey this year has been so amazing to watch. From beating out the fan favourite in Belgium's national final (and giving us an amazing surprised / scared reaction 😂) to the fans being unsure if this was gonna do well to him eventually winning everyone by the preparties and the eventual semi performance. Wow! And then he cried when he qualified! I'm so happy for him 😁

6. Cyprus 🇨🇾 - My man pulled through and made us proud (it's an unwritten rule than whenever Cyprus has a better song than Greece we switch sides) He's hot, the hottest guy in the contest this year, no other options are correct, and he also has an amazing voice to go with it. He's gonna go toe to toe with Marco and Remo on best male vocals on the final.

7. Iceland 🇮🇸 - So sad for Diljá honestly, she's so crazy and fun and she's a fan of the contest too! Amazing vocals, especially considering all the jumping around she did but I feel like they could have done something better with her staging? Idk.

8. Greece 🇬🇷 - Wooo boy. Ok. I know I've been going hard at him since the rehearsal footage came out, maybe a little bit earlier because Poland's was not the only selection allegedly rigged, but honestly? He was better than expected. He did work on his pronunciation and his stage presence and he did the best he could... Which wasn't enough. And I don't want to use his age as an excuse because you have kids in Eurovision Junior doing much better than that or even 13 year old Sandra Kim winning for Belgium before the 16+ age limit was put in place. If I remember correctly it was actually because of Sandra Kim that they put an age limit because she was so good she EMBARASSED the fuck out of all the adults and then they complained that she was younger than what her song says (15). The outfit and the GRΣΣK script on English words was cringe as fuck, though these were not his fault. When people say they want countries to showcase their cultures more, spelling spirit as ΣPIRIT is not what they mean. God the greek broadcaster needs to touch some grass real quick. I also have a tiny bit of an issue with what he said in an interview, that he wrote the song because he was feeling overwhelmed about being signed to a big record label or sth? Well, Victor, I hope the whole world only had problems of this caliber! Turns out he actually is a nepo baby after all, his grandfather is a shipowner but allegedly this did not influence the greek broadcaster's decision on choosing him over the fan favourite. Sure Jan.

9. Poland 🇵🇱 - I don't know if the EBU put the two alleged cheaters back to back on purpose, probably not because no one seemed to care about the Greek allegations anyway, but in my mind this was iconic. Okay. Miss BEJBAH was good. Not "slay yas werk you're gonna be an icon of the contest" good but good enough to qualify. I told you all she was gonna make it. Most people who watch the show do not follow the preselection process and then some won't care anyway. Her song was okay, her performance was okay, she's gonna tank in the final. Get over it. I'm also curious about something. If the roles of her and Jann were reversed, would he have faced as much backlash? I think not. But what do I know?

10. Slovenia 🇸🇮 - They're okay. I like them. Their song is catchy. That's it. I literally don't know what more to say. I've seen tons of hype for them and their song and their alleged stellar stage presence and they absolutely deserved to qualify but this is just an okay, inoffensive, enjoyable song. I don't feel too strongly about it either way.

11. Georgia 🇬🇪 - Why do you hate joy Europe? Why? Why did you not vote for her? Why? Why? Why? I voted for her SIX times, two of which I'm not sure even went through because I only got confirmation TODAY, so when the detailed voting scores are announced Greece better have given her SOMETHING. But no I'm genuinely puzzled. Out of the borderline qualifiers I expected her to beat Alika. I'm happy for Alika of course, she deserves it, but Iru gave a very solid performance, she was on key the whole time, she looked great and the song was peak Eurovision, what the fuck went wrong here? A lot of my friends seemed to like her too. Two said she was their favourite last night, same as me, one liked her a lot and the other was the only one who hated her performance. I'm sad 😢

12. San Marino 🇸🇲 - Piqued Jacks was a pleasant surprise honestly. I liked them much more than I expected as they consistently ranked among my least favourites but I think they have a very solid performance that they can be proud of.

13. Austria 🇦🇹 - Okay, I got really nervous because both their performance back in Austria and their rehearsal footage looked so low-key? They felt maybe a bit too shy? I know they couldn't possibly recreate that phenomenal music video on stage, but I wanted, and still do, to see them embrace the kookiness of their song. I think they played it too safe, too serious. But then again they do have a serious message they want to get across underneath this fun crazy song so maybe it was intentional? Anyway, they still were more enjoyable than I thought they would be and I'm glad they're in!

14. Albania 🇦🇱 - Talk about a glow up alright! I'm not even mad they qualified over Georgia, because even though the odds predicted Georgia 9th and Albania 11th (they were even lower before the show) I knew they were gonna make it the moment I saw their performance. It's not a perfect song but it still had so much identity and a distinct ethnic, Balkan sound that is otherwise completely absent from this year's Contest so people were bound to pass it through to the final. I'm afraid they might land very close to the bottom in the final, but it honestly doesn't matter because Albina and her Familja still very much have a place in the final, regardless of their placing.

15. Lithuania 🇱🇹 - YES Monika YES!! Another definite qualifier in my mind. I personally loved her since day one. I said I almost cried during Latvia's performance in the first semi, well I did cry during Monika's! Amazing job girl.

16. Australia 🇦🇺 - Good. Solid. Fun. I don't feel too strongly about this either, and I do think San Marino was more enjoyable to watch, but I'm happy for them.

[blusical]

Hi hockeyblr! We have NHL hockey today! With the first preseason game starting tonight, I think we should keep some reminders in mind: -Don't crosstag! This is general tumblr etiquette (and if I remember correctly also against Tumblr TOS as a whole!) but I'm putting it out there just in case!

-Not every person who cheers for a team you hate is your enemy. Not every person who cheers for a player you hate is your enemy. Trash talk is fine (and encouraged!), but harassment isn't. This isn't Twitter! Be kind (or atleast classy) to everyone- yes, even those 'stinky' bruins fans and hawks fans that yall like to dog on so much. --Additionally, don't go to team lb tags and comment hate on said team. That just makes you an asshole.

-Tags and filters exist for a reason; USE THEM. Tag anything that needs to be tagged, and filter out stuff you don't like!

--Additionally, if someone doesn't have anything tagged (ex. injuries not tagged, smut not tagged, etc), kindly tell them to tag it. If they refuse, block them! Remember: Don't like, don't look! --STOP CENSORING PLAYERS/TEAM NAMES L*KE TH*S (like this). Not only does it fuck with tag filters, but it's also not helpful for people who use screenreaders. (See also: This post which goes into more detail on this subject). -As stated above, the block button also exists for a reason; USE IT. -Live blog tags (lb for short) stay separate from regular team tags! Lb tags should be used during games or other events (like the draft, all star game or free agency).

-I feel like we could all use this, especially with the events of the offseason and last season (and prior seasons tbh): Someone not knowing or posting about a serious event does not mean that they don't care about said event. You don't have to speak on every bad thing that occurs in hockey! I know I complain a lot about hockey fans and their hypocrisy when it comes to discussing issues with hockey culture, but at the same time I want people to focus on themselves and their health too! <3

-You don't have to know about everything a player thinks or does! You also don't have to know about every single problematic thing a player has done/said. If we knew every single negative trait about every player, none of us would be here lol. -Whatever happens on Tumblr (Or AO3 if you write fic), STAYS THERE. We don't need a repeat of the Booktok incident. -While block buttons do exist, it's also not hard to say "Hey maybe saying this isn't cool" to a mutual when they say something really fucking bigoted. -DON'T. WISH. INJURY. ON. PLAYERS (Or celebrate injury!). Yes, even if said player is a shitty human being. Again, this isn't Twitter.

-Lastly, just have fun! Just chill and argue about who's the best player!

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS DARK FATE Yoyaku Tokuten Drama CD ”Urgent ★ The Vampires Ran Out of Money”

Original title: 切実に★お金がないヴァンパイアたち

Source: Diabolik Lovers DARK FATE Yoyaku Tokuten Drama CD

Audio: Here

Seiyuu: Toriumi Kousuke, Katsuyuki Konishi, Midorikawa Hikaru, Kaji Yuki, Hirakawa Daisuke, Takashi Kondou, Takahiro Sakurai, Kimura Ryouhei, Tatsuhisa Suzuki, Kishio Daisuke, Morikawa Toshiyuki & Morikubo Shoutaro

Translator’s note: This CD felt really nostalgic for some reason because it offers some quality REIJI SUFFERING HOURS. If there’s one thing which has stuck with me from the early era (HDB/MB) drama CDs, it’s that Reiji almost always got the short end of the stick, haha. While it’s no different here, I can’t help but feel like it’s kind of his own fault. For someone who prides himself over being oh-so smart, maybe it wasn’t clever to mention having savings around 11 Vampires who are clearly desperate for that sweet, sweet cash. 

→  LIKE MY TRANSLATIONS? SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI!

Shin: Haah…

*Flip*

Shin: Damn…This is looking pretty bad…Haah…Ugh. At this rate, we’ll…

Carla: Shin. …What have you been mumbling about this whole time?

Shin: Ahー Nii-san. You see, we’ve run into some trouble you see…

Carla: Trouble? Is your heart aching because I haven’t been attempting to murder you as of late? 

Shin: No. I’m definitely not complaining about that part…

Carla: Then what is it? Tell me. I might just offer you my advice. 

Shin: Eh? Eeeh…But I feel like you’re not the right person to ask in this case…

Carla: Who do you think I am? 

Shin: Who? I mean…The King of Founders…and my older brother.

Carla: Exactly. It is your duty to report everything to me, without hiding any details. Now, ell me. 

Shin: Hm…Actuallyーー We’ve run out.

Carla: Run out of what? Be more specific.

Shin: Money! We’re all out of money!

Carla: Money? 

Shin: Here, take a look at this bill. It displays all of our spendings for this month. They’re through the roof because you keep on buying things like whole legs of cured ham or weird abstract paintings behind my back!

Carla: No need to get so upset, Shin. I needed all of those things.

Shin: Necessary? I don’t believe that. I’ll give you a pass on the cured ham, but can you truly say the same about that painting which looks like a child went ham with their crayons doodled a bunch of pasta noodles on a blank canvas!? 

Carla: If I deem it necessary, then it is. 

Shin: Ugh…I figured you’d say that, hence why I didn’t want to bring it up. Anyway, we’ll need to come up with a way to make money. 

Carla: Can’t we have the masses donate to us? Have you tried asking Mertz to hand some over?

Shin: I’ve long tried that. I’m not sure if he knows I’m trying to ask for money, but he’s been completely ignoring my messages.

Carla: Then why don’t we make it easy on ourselves and just take it from random people around these parts? 

Shin: But if we choose the criminal path, we won’t be able to move freely around in the human world, will we? …Oh, right! I guess those guys would be an option!

Carla: The Sakamaki and Mukami family? If I recall correctly, Karlheinz has infiltrated this world and has been dabbling in politics alongside his connection with the Church. 

Shin: Yup, exactly. I heard he’s pretty stacked. …Heh. It shouldn’t be an issue then. It’s settled then. Let’s have those guys provide us with money. 

Shin gets up. 

Shin: Time is money! I’ll go give them a visit right away. 

Carla: I shall come with you as well.

Shin: Eh? No need to bother, really…

Carla: I cannot imagine they will simply hand over the money. If I am there as well, it should have at least somewhat of an impact. It is for the sake of my cured ham and paintings, therefore I have no other choice. 

Shin: Seems like you don’t want to give those up, no matter what, Nii-san…

*TIMESKIP*

*Flip flip* 

Reiji: Haahー … We’re cutting it close again this month as well. I suppose we spent a little too much. No, that’s not the problem. It’s all because of all the unnecessary repair costs we had to pay to have the manor fixed. Good grief…

Ayato: Reiji. 

Reiji: The answer is no. 

Ayato: But I haven’t even asked anything yet!? 

Reiji: I know exactly what you’ll ask of me. I bet you’re here to pester me for cash, correct? Either way, the answer stays no. …Well, I suppose it would be more accurate to say I cannot.

Ayato: Che…You stingy Four-Eyes!

Reiji: Oh my, are you sure you can afford to throw such insults at my head? May I remind you that I am the one who monitors the money of this family? 

Ayato: Che…What’s your problem!? I’m all out of money to buy takoyaki tomorrow. Can’t you lend me a lil’? 

Reiji: What part of ‘no’ do you not comprehend? Or rather, I cannot give you something which I do not have. 

Kanato: Reiji! Do you have a second? 

Reiji: Kanato, you too…Wha!? 

Laito: Nfu~ Actually, I’m here too!

Subaru: You can’t blame us, can you!? 

Shuu: If you’re handing out money, I’ll take some as well. 

Reiji: How do you guys think the economy works!? I gave all of you pocket money a mere three days ago, didn’t I!? 

Laito: The amount you gave us wasn’t nearly enough! I went on a couple of days with some girls and poof, it’s all gone!

Kanato: Exactly. I could barely buy any sweets with it.

Subaru: It was clearly too little. 

Shuu: Yes, exactly. You should just hand us the goods already. Hurry up. 

Reiji: No. ーー Or rather, we’re all out of money for this month. 

Ayato: Aah…!? Don’t be lyin’ to us! We know that you’re still hidin’ some!

Reiji: That would be my personal money. I’ve been setting some of my gainings aside each month and I shall not be sharing any of it with you guys, obviously. 

Subaru: Haah!? Fuck off! You’re tryin’ to live the good life all by yourself, aren’t you!? 

Reiji: You can try and threaten me all you want. If you want money that badly, why not ask Father for some instead of me? 

Shuu: Haah…The Old Man, huh?

Ayato: …!! 

Kanato: Laito. You go and ask Father for money. 

Laito: Haah!? Why me!? …As my older brother, it’s your duty to do that, isn’t it?

Kanato: …!! I-I don’t want to! As if I ever could!

Subaru: Just so you know, I’m not doin’ it either!

Reiji: Well, there you have it, so why not simply give up? If you upset Father, he might just send you to Mars for real this time. 

*Ding・dong* 

Reiji: Hm? A visitor? Was someone coming over today?

*TIMESKIP*

Shin: …And there you have it. Now give us the money. 

Reiji: You are catching me quite by surprise but…I do not see why we would need to lend you money? 

Subaru: Exactly. I mean, if we could go and hand it out for free, we wouldn’t be strugglin’ so much ourselves. 

Carla: What do you mean by that? 

Laito: Haah…In short, our family is just as short on cash as yours is. 

Ayato: Exactly! You can’t get noodles from a stone!

Kanato: Ayato, you idiot. It’s ‘soda’, not ‘noodles’. (1)

Carla: What a bunch of fools… 

Shin: Honestly, I don’t care but maybe you shouldn’t be telling lies? Who do you think you’re dealing with, huh? We’re respectable Founders, remember? Do you understand that? 

Reiji: They’re not lying. It’s the truth. Our current savings are non-existent. I almost want to show you our bank extracts, honestly. 

Carla: Sakamaki Tougo is portrayed as a wealthy individual, is he not? It does not take a genius to figure that one out. Don’t underestimate us. 

Shuu: You’re the one making a big mistake by assuming that we’re rich just because the Old Man is. 

Ayato: Yeah! That Shitty Old Man…He’s makin’ that sweet, sweet cash but he won’t even share a single penny with us! 

Kanato: Exactly…! I’ve heard that children from other wealthy families sometimes get up to one million yen for New Year’s. Yet we still have to do with only three thousand! Uuu…Uuuu~  (2)

Shin: …A-Are you…for real? 

Subaru: Dead serious. 

Carla: …!

Shin: Nii-san, what now? We’ve barked up the wrong tree. I feel like we shouldn’t expect too much from the Mukami family either at this rate…

Carla: We cannot know for sure until we ask. They were born and raised as humans, so perhaps they are skilled at saving money. 

Ruki: …What is this about us? 

The Mukami’s arrive to the scene. 

Kou: Hey there, my fellow Vampire comrades~

Subaru: The fuck’s you guys’ problem…? Whatcha all flockin’ together here for!? 

Yuma: Let’s say we’ve got a serious situation goin’ on.  

Azusa: We didn’t actually want to but…Ruki said that we have no other choice but to come and ask for it all together…

Laito: Heeh~? You’re here to ask something from us? How unusual. 

Ruki: Kou had the glorious idea to burn through our family’s entire budget.

Kou: I didn’t have any ill will! There just so happened to be a couple of things I really wanted…Whoopsie~

Yuma: ‘Whoopsie’, my ass! Ya better don’t believe that’ll get ya away with it!

Reiji: …! Don’t tell me…You guys are having money issues as well? 

Ruki: ‘As well’, you say? Don’t tell me…Are the two Tsukinami’s here to beg you for money as well? 

Carla: Do not put it in such a vulgar way. We are Founders. In other words, you Vampires are obligated to submit to us. We came here to have you bow down to us and offer everything you have. 

Azusa: So in other words…You’re trying to blackmail them? 

Shin: We’re not! We’ve already made our point!

Ruki: Who cares about that. Reiji. You get the gist of the situation now so…Would you be so kind to share some money with us? 

Reiji: Good grief…As I already explained to the two gentlemen over there earlier, I am afraid that we cannot offer something we do not have. 

Ruki: You don’t? Is that true? Don’t you guys get showered in money by Karlheinz-sama? 

Ayato: No way. 

Laito: I guess you could say it’s part of his educational approach, but he believes that children should learn how to be mindful with money. (3)

Shin: Nii-san, what are we gonna do now? Seems like the Mukami’s are all out of money too. 

Carla: …

Yuma: Ahー Guess we’ve got no other no other choice but to work, huh? 

Reiji: Exactly. If we get a daytime job, we should be able to save up enough money to get through our everyday lives. Speaking of which…Kou, you have a job, don’t you? 

Shuu: Now that you mention it. You’re an idol, aren’t you? 

Carla: An idol…Which means you’re actually fairly rich? 

Kou: J-Just so we’re all on the same page on this, but like what was mentioned, I blew through all my money so I no longer have anything!

Subaru: Smells fishy to me. I bet this guy is actually loaded on cash despite what he’s sayin’. 

Kou: S-Subaru-kun! Don’t put weird ideas into everyone’s head! Besides, if I did have secret savings, I would have long revealed them! It’s pure humiliation to have to bow our heads to you guys like this! 

Ayato: Which means we’ve really got no other choice but to work, huh? 

Kanato: I’m against the idea! Not in a million years will I work!

Shin: You say that but you’ve got no other choice, do you? We’ll wait, so you guys hurry up and go make us some money through working, okay?

Subaru: Ah? I think you’re gettin’ the wrong idea here. Even if we do earn some money through workin’, we’re not gonna lend it to you fuckers.

Carla: Like I previously stated, it is your duty to hand over your money to us.

Ayato: Idiot! Like we give a damn ‘bout that!

Carla gets upset.

Ayato: …Y-You don’t have to get that angry, do you?

Carla: You fiend…Try repeating yourself one more time. What was that you said just now?

Ayato: W-Well…

Shin: …!! A-Ayato! Take your statement back right now! Or do you want this manor to get blown to bits!? 

Reiji: Blown to bits!? Excuse me, Ayato! Do you have any idea how much it’ll cost to have the manor rebuilt from scratch!? Apologize at once!

Ayato: Ugh…My bad…

Carla: …Oh well, I suppose I can let it slide. In return, come and bring us the money at once. Do you understand? 

Shuu: Good grief…This is what we have to deal with, huh? So, what are we gonna do now? Just so you don’t, I don’t want to work. 

Subaru: I’m not workin’ either.

Laito: I mean, me neither but what are we gonna do about our money issues? 

Kanato: Can’t Reiji just hand over his savings? 

Reiji: I figured you’d say that. However, like I mentioned earlieーー

Ruki: If you have any savings left, give them to us. 

Yuma: Anyway, why would ya first claim to be all out when you’ve actually got some savings put aside? If ya the money to us, it’ll solve all problems. 

Kou: Ahー Geez, I actually was seriously worried for nothing.£

Azusa: Hey, Reiji-san…You’ll give us the money, right? 

Everyone stares at Reiji intensely

Reiji: …!? Excuse me…? Why are you staring at me like that!? …Let me inform you just in case, but trying to force me to pay will not work. I will not give in to your threats. 

Carla: Then we simply do not resort to coercion, correctly? All we need to do is make it so you will gladly hand us the money. 

Ruki: I see. I suppose we have that option. What a genius idea. 

Reiji: D-Do not be ridiculous! What on earth makes you believe I will want to do that?

Shin: I wonder? We won’t know until you try, right? 

Reiji: …W-What are you planning to do!? 

*Rustle* 

Shuu: …Reiji, let me give you a shoulder massage. 

Reiji: …!? 

Shuu: Don’t be modest now. 

Ayato: Reiji! I’ll feed you this takoyaki I’ve got over here! Come on, open wide! ‘Aaahn!’

Reiji: …N-No thank you!

Kou: Hmm~ In that case, I rarely ever give someone such a treat but I’ll perform the currently number-one popular idol song live for you! 

Reiji: No, no, no! Please don’t sing!

Yuma: Geez…Ya give me no other choice. Ya can have as many of the summer vegetables from my field as ya want. Totally free!

Reiji: That does sound tempting…No, no, if anything, you should sell those vegetables to make money yourself. 

Yuma: Nah, I’ll only get some small change for it.

Ruki: Then how does this sound? I shall cook for you using Yuma’s vegetables. 

Reiji: I prefer cooking myself rather than eating!

Laito: Then how about this? I’ll wash your back for you~!

Reiji: Please don’t even suggest something so creepy! …Ah, god!

*Thud* 

Reiji: You guys can say whatever you want, but I’m not giving you any of my savings! End of the story!

Kanato: E-Excuse me!? Where are you going!? 

Reiji: Away from you lot. 

Azusa: No…You can’t. 

Reiji: Mukami Azusa…Move aside at once. 

Azusa: No, I won’t move. Hey…Please listen to my request? If you do, you can hit me all you want. Okay? 

Reiji: Wha…!? Y-Your request…? I bet you also want to ask for money, correct? Besides, I fail to see what I would gain from this deal. Isn’t getting hit basically your hobby?

Azusa: It isn’t.

Reiji: …!? Then what is it!? 

Azusa: My life? 

Shin: That suddenly got deep. 

Reiji: Whatever. Just please step aside. Iーー

Carla puts his hand on Reiji’s shoulder. 

Carla: You are not getting away. 

Reiji: …!! What do you want, Carla? Get your hand off me. 

Carla: I am afraid you will have to sacrifice you for the sake of my cured ham and painting collection! …Shin!

Shin: Roger~! 

*Rustle* 

Shin: Now behave, okay? 

*Rustle* 

Reiji: …!? W-What are you going to do!? 

Carla: Of course, I would have loved to be able to refrain from resorting to such extreme measures. However, none of this would have happened if you would have simply given us the money right away. 

Reiji: Hah? 

Carla: Oi, you lot! Do not stand there spacing out but help out!

Shuu: Haah…What a drag. But I guess it can’t be helped. It’s for the greater good…I don’t want to have to give up on my CDs either. 

Ayato: Yeah. …Reiji. Don’t take it personally, ‘kay? 

*Thud* 

Kanato: It’s for my sweets, so I’m sure you can understand, right? 

*Thud* 

Laito: I’ve got a couple of dates planned out already as well, so you leave me no other choice~ 

*Thud* 

Subaru: Maybe you shouldn’t have been so stingy, huh? 

*Thud* 

Reiji: …!? Y-You guys…! Aren’t you embarrassed, letting those Founders order you around like that!? 

Ruki: We haven’t become their loyal servants, really. We simply…Right.

*Thud* 

Ruki: Share a mutual interest right now. 

Reiji: …!! Ruki, even you…

Kou: Don’t worry~! We won’t hurt you…!

*Thud* 

Yuma: Hehehe…Now we’re talkin’...

*Thud* 

Azusa: Reiji-san…Are you ready…?

*Thud* 

Reiji: …! Kuh…C-Cut it out!

Carla: It is not too late to change your mind just yet. Well then, will you give us the money? 

Reiji: …Y-You’re playing it dirty! I am not the type of guy who will give in to these kinds of threats! Please do not underestimate me!

Shin: I guess our negotiations end here then. 

Carla: You leave me no other choice…You lot! Do it!

Reiji: …! S-Stop…!

They all start tickling Reiji simultaneously. 

Reiji: Excuse me…W-What are you…? Ahahahaha…!

Shuu: It’s your own fault for not simply giving us the money right away.

They continue tickling him. 

Reiji: Wait…Stoーー...! It tickles…! Hahaha…Ahahaha…! …I can’t…! I swear…!

Subaru: Ah, damnit! Just throw in the towel already!

Reiji: My god…I really can’t…Ahahaha! …You lot! I can’t believe you’d resort to this…!

Kou: Ah~ Come on, just say you give up already~ 

Reiji: …Fine! I understand! Please, just stop already! I’m begging you!

Yuma: What do you mean? …Take this!

Reiji: I’ll share the money…That’s all you want from me, right!? 

Carla: Good grief…Was that truly worth all the trouble? You should have simply given it to us from the very start. 

Reiji: Haah, haah…I never thought it’d come to this…Good grief…You lot are unbelievable… 

Shin: Well then. You better hurry up and show us the money. You don’t want a repeat of that, do you? 

Reiji: Che…

Reiji goes to fetch the money. 

*Rustle rustle* 

*Cling* 

*Clunk* 

*Creaaaak* 

*Rustle* 

He returns. 

*THUD*

Reiji: …Now you have no more complaints, correct? 

Ayato: Woah! You’re stacked…! When did you save up all of this money? 

Reiji: …I’ve been carefully setting some money aside each time, while all of you were too busy spending it recklessly. Good grief. This is horrible. It’s always the honest people who get the short end of the stick. 

…Oh well, I suppose it’s fine. I suppose you are all in debt with me right now, so please, go ahead and use this money as you see fit. 

Shuu: Is that sarcasm I smell there? …Oh well, guess I’ll borrow some. 

Carla: …!

*Smack* 

Shuu: Ah…

Carla: Who gave you permission to take some of that money? 

Shuu: What do you mean? 

Shin: This amount of money will barely even cut it to buy Nii-san’s cured ham, so we’ll be taking all of it. 

Ruki: Excuse me? 

Carla: If you have a problem with that, I shall gladly be your opponent. 

Ayato: Haah!? 

Subaru: So you wanna throw fists, huh!? 

Ruki: Yuma. It’s time for plan B.

Yuma: Roger! …Oi, Azusa. 

Azusa: Mmh. I know. 

*Rustle* 

Azusa: Carla-san. Shin-san. We won’t let you do with that money as you please. Well then, Kou, Yuma, Ruki…Hurry up and take the money!

Azusa becomes a shield for them.

*Rustle* 

Shin: E-Excuse me…!? What are you doing? 

*Rustle* 

Ruki: My bad, but we’re taking this cash. 

Carla: Che. Seems like you four do not value your own life. 

*BZZZZT*

Azusa takes the hit. 

Azusa: …Ugh! Uu…Haah, haah…

Carla: Excuse me!? He withstood my attack…!? 

Ruki: My bad, Azusa! We’ll see each other at the meeting place later!

Kou: Don’t push yourself too much, okay, Azusa-kun!? 

Yuma: See ya!

The other three Mukami’s run away.

Azusa: Don’t…worry…I love…the pain after all…Haah…~  …Come on, Carla-san. More…! Fire more of those at me…!!

Carla: …!!

Kanato: …H-Hold up!! The money…!! They took all of it with them!

Reiji: …Come again!? When did they…!? I didn’t notice because I was too busy looking at Carla. 

Shuu: Haah…What a drag. Why did it turn out like this? Don’t you think it’s because you guys were trying to be too greedy? 

Carla: Hmph! That money was mine from the very start, so this isn’t an issue of being greedy or not. 

Ayato: It’s a lost case. There’s no talkin’ with this dude. 

Carla: Oi, Shin! Chase after them!

Shin: Yeah, yeah, I know. Or rather, if you would simply give up on your cured ham and those weird paintings, we wouldn’t even need money…

Azusa attempts to stop him. 

*Thud* 

Azusa: Wait, Shin-san! You have to defeat me first…!

Shin: Ah, god! You better stay away from me, you freaky masochist! 

Shin runs away. 

Laito: Hey, what are we gonna do now? 

Kanato: I’m exhausted…I’ll simply content myself with the sweets I still have in the cupboard. I can’t picture myself chasing after them. 

Laito: Right? When I think about it…It’s not like I’m that desperate to go on a date with girls other than Bitch-chan. 

Ayato: Me too. I can just have Chichinashi make me free takoyaki instead, right? 

Shuu: Haah…I guess it’s obvious the same goes for me. Pwaah…I’m sleepy. 

*Thud* 

Subaru: Damnit…! The fuck’s this shit…

Ayato: By the way, Subaru…Why did you even want money to begin with? 

Subaru: W-Well…You know…I figured I’d upgrade my coffin a lil’ here and there…

Reiji: Good grief…I suppose your situations weren’t nearly as pressing as the Mukami family’s. Haah…Oh well. You lot try to abstain from your luxuries for once, understood? …Oh. 

Carla: …

Reiji: You are still here? 

Carla: Hmph. You have some nerve to say that, you commoner. I shall stay here until Shin returns. 

*Rustle* 

Reiji: Good grief, you truly are unbelievable…Why not simply give up on your cured ham and painting collection? 

Carla: I shall give up on the latter. I could never buy them with that little money anyway. 

Reiji: Hmph. But it seems that the cured ham is something you cannot give up? 

Carla: It is my favorite food after all. 

Reiji: Ahー Well…If that’s the case, I suppose you really need the money just as badly as the Mukami family does. 

Carla: Hmph. 

Reiji: Ahーah…I suppose I will have to start saving up again. This time, I suppose I will not mention it to anyone and keep it my own little secret. 

ーー THE END ーー 

Translation notes

(1) This short back-and-forth between Ayato and Kanato is all based on a language pun around the Japanese proverb: ない袖は振れない’ which literally means ‘you can’t shake a sleeve you don’t have’ and refers to being unable to give what one does not have themselves. Ayato gets things mixed up and says そば (soba / soba noodles) instead of 袖 (sode / sleeve). Kanato then promptly ‘corrects’ him by stating that it’s ソーダ (soda) instead. Of course, both of them are equally incorrect. I struggled to translate this part quite a bit, but I eventually settled with the English provide ‘you can’t get blood from a stone’ since it was the easiest to replace one noun for another in that one. 

(2) ¥1,000,000 and ¥3,000 are approximately 10,000 and 30 USD respectively. 

(3) Laito refers to the concept of ‘Honorable poverty’ (清貧), coined by the Japanese philosophist Suzume, who believes in the dangers of excess consumption and waste.

[awkwardspontaneity]

Hello. This is my first request for the Legend of Zelda, so I do not know how to write it correctly. I don't speak English and I'm writing this in a translator, so there may be mistakes here, sorry. In general, I want to see how the reader will react to the fact that Revali, Link and Sidon cheated on her. (something made me feel sad) Thank you in advance ╹▽╹

I'm so sorry something happened to upset you. If it's along the lines of this request give me a name😤👊 anyways thank you so much for requesting!! This ended up being so much longer than I intended but I'm pretty happy with it. I hope this is what you're looking for!

✨ requests are open✨

Warning: angst, cheating

Revali🐦

I think with his prickly nature not a lot of people would stick around long enough to get to know how much he cares

But some bitch saw how much he was training to perfect his powers to help Hyrule and couldn't resist

It started off as bringing him lunches and heat pads after a long day of training and then it escalated

They would wrap his wings up and suddenly he was letting them fix his braids. He never saw it as much more than a fan helping him out but you saw differently

It ended up in a big fight when you finally brought up how Revali was allowing this fan to hang off of him like they were his partner not you. You brought up excellent points like how he took such a long time to even trust you with braiding his hair and that he could at least let them know he's in a relationship.

Revali got upset (probably cuz ur right and he can't admit it) and snapped that at least they appreciated him

Yeah bad move. You walked out and bird brain left to train away the pain

You came across his first and decided to head to the shooting range with some peace snacks but what do you find?

You walk up the slope towards the archery range, a container of Revali's favourite snacks in hand. As you approach you see something sitting inside the hut and assume it's him. Sterling your breath you walk into the hut and what you find takes your breath away- not in the good way either. Revali sat there with his wings wrapped around them, too caught up on their liplock to notice you standing there.

CRASH

The container hits the ground with a shatter, ruining their little scene.

"Y/n-"

"Don't even try it." You wish your voice didn't sound as broken. No matter how much your heart squeezed in pain from the betrayal, you wanted to come off so much different- angrier. Because you were angry. "Just because we have an argument does not give you the right to run off with your new friend."

Revali flinches at the word and you feel a sick glimmer of satisfaction. He opens his mouth to protest, ignoring your glare. "I-I'm sorry." Your glare darkens and he immediately flounders for the right words. "You accused me of something I didn't do-"

Yeah, not the right words. You wish you could do something, anything to hurt him like he hurt you. But you had to be the bigger person no matter how much you wanted to snap that precious bow of his in half.

"I accused you, not have you permission."

"We can work through this, together" his wing reached out to you, but you recoiled to fast.

"We're not together." You walked towards the entrance "I hope it was worth it."

Link 🗡️

Link is a closed off person. Sure he has people worship him for his title as the hero of Hyrule, but he would never let that get to his head. You could tell this boy he's amazing and it still wouldn't get through his insecurities

Maybe it's cruel but, that almost reassured you he would never break your heart like that. You felt secure in your relationship

That's why it was so shocking when you found out he had fallen for Zelda.

It wasn't meant to ever be more than knight and princess. And you never should have found out.

You were walking towards the stables of your party was staying at. It was supposed to be a simple trip to complete some research out in the plains. Of course your trip was ambushed by an energetic princess who begged to come along for research purposes. You couldn't complain because the addition of the princess also came with your boyfriend Link.

Now you were looking for him outside the small ranch. You fully expected him to be caring for Epona like he always did after a long trip. His love for his horse was something you had always loved about him. The way he would stay later than everyone else to make sure she was okay. It had made stables kind of your spot. Hanging out at the end of a long day to talk and spend time together while caring for your steeds.

Maybe that was why your heart felt so utterly shattered when you did find him, standing next to the stable, with the princess in his arms. Maybe you could have fooled yourself into believing he was being friendly if he hadn't pressed a long loving kiss to her forehead followed by both her cheeks, chuckling softly as she giggled.

You knew they had always been close. I mean they spent all their time together. You'd just never thought that Link would do something like this to you.

You walked away from the stables fighting backs the tears in your eyes. It was only when you found you had walked into an older area, a spare shack outside, that you finally let the tears fall. Your heart twisted in pain as sobs tore from your throat.

Why hasn't you seen this? Why weren't you enough?

------

Your research trip was almost over. You had gone back late into the night to find Link on the edge of his bed head in his hands. He had shot up to demand where you had been when you finally walked in and although he looked like he wanted to argue, he accepted that you had been organizing your research supplies and notes in quiet.

That had been 3 days ago. You had spent the research trip sticking close to your colleagues, poring over each plant and testing their uses. The princess was too distracted with her own interests to really notice how you shied away from her presence. Link had though. And he was about done with you brushing him off in favour of your work. You both were busy so not having time was nothing new. But this was different. You couldn't meet his eyes and he had caught you staring at him and Zelda as if you were about to cry before. He was at a loss and now he needed to figure things out for himself.

However he wasn't quite ready for the answer.

"I saw you and Zelda together."

His throat closed up. He wanted to say so many things. How sorry he was. How he wished he could have told you himself. How he wished he could hold you and forget how complicated things were.

"it's okay." Now that, he wasn't expecting. "I thought I could be mad at you. Both of you. But I guess... It just makes sense." You sniffled softly. You really didn't want to do this. You hated that it had to be you who gave up. But we're you really going to fight? No. As much as it tore your heart into pieces, you would stand aside for them. "I wish that things hadn't changed but, clearly you don't feel the same anymore and I don't want to hold you back. I love you. So much. But I don't deserve this, and I won't put either of us through the trouble. I hope you two are happy together Link."

As you walked towards your friends to head home Link felt his heart clench. You deserved so much better.

Sidon🦈

You were a princess from another kingdom, betrothed to Prince Sidon of the Zora. We all know how these things go, neither of you were all that fond of the idea but you would go through with it. For your kingdoms

You tried to be as understanding as possible of the situations, knowing that the prince was just as trapped as you were. So you played along with your parents wishes.

You two went on dates and spent time together, getting closer and closer until finally you kissed him.

Things were great. You were planning your wedding and enjoying the time you spent with your fiance as you prepared for your future

It wasn't until a few days before the wedding when you were trying on your dress that things fell apart.

Your dressmaker had been in a bad mood, grumbling as they worked and even sticking you with needles a few times. You would have brushed it off as a bad day if not for the facts that they seemed so unapologetic.

You finally brought it up, softly asking if there was something wrong and if you could help. They snapped, going off about how you were ruining the princes life and that he didn't love you and was only marrying you for his kingdom and that he deserved to be happy.

They realized their mistake and left quickly, leaving you alone in your wedding dress with shocked tears slipping down your face.

You later made you way to Sidons office, hoping to clear some things up and maybe seek comfort from the one you loved.

What you didn't expect was to find him already comforting someone. Your dressmaker.

You watched as he whispered sweet nothings and reassurances to them. It was when he said no matter what they were the one that he loved when you broke away.

You stood in your room, packed bags beside you. You knew there were better ways to deal with this. You knew that your kingdom was counting on you and thus marriage. You just couldn't go through with it. Not anymore.

"Y/n?"

You sound around to find the Zora princess standing in your doorway. Mipha had become a close friend in your time in the Zora domain, even feeling like family as you worked closely planning the wedding. She had once told you that you were everything she could hope for in a sister and wife for her brother. You guessed it didn't matter in the end.

Finally you choked out pained words "I can't... I just... I can't do this anymore."

"If you are feeling nervous, I can assure you my brother would never hurt you."

This made you laugh. It was cold, similar to the ice creeping into your veins. "He would. And he did." You cut off Mipha's confusion, wringing a hand through your hair, "Sidon is in love with someone else. I made every effort to work through this engagement despite our... rocky beginning. But he didn't choose me back. He never wanted me, and I won't ruin his chance to be happy."

The room was silent after your outburst. You only noticed the tears when your friend wiped them from your eyes. She offered you a small smile, sharing the pain you felt. She was losing you and still understood it was best for you. You needed to move on and save yourself from a life of pain. A life of being chosen second.

"I hope one day we can meet again, sister."

You let out a choked mix of a son and laugh. Hugging the princess before you grabbed your bags and walked out the door, out of the kingdom that stole your heart and crushed it in its hands.

"I love you, always."

[labomi]

a demon’s promise | (18+)

summary: You didn't want to spend your Friday night trying to summon the king of all demons in your tiny apartment, but here you are with your best friend by your side reciting an incantation from a strange book. To your utter relief, the spell doesn't work or so you seem to think.

pairing: sukuna ryomen x f!reader

words: 4.2k

warnings: explicit sexual content, slight dubcon, smut, explicit language, choking, overstimulation, rough sex, pet names, not a particularly happy ending

notes: read on ao3 here! first sukuna piece and i don’t have much to say except aahhhhh!! i initially planned it to be more of a cute, fluffy story but obviously that didn’t happen oops. well anyways thanks for reading!

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” you ask hesitantly, watching your best friend finish drawing a pentagram on your living room floor. Kimi dusts the chalk off her fingers, admiring her work with a satisfied smile.

“Oh, come on,” she says, a little exasperated at you. “Don’t bail on me now. Aren’t you the tiniest bit excited?”

“About summoning a demon from a weird book you found in the back of a sketchy thrift shop? Yea, I’m absolutely thrilled,” you deadpan.

It was about a week ago when Kimi surprised you with her new find. The book was bound in torn leather and filled with handwritten notes about how to conjure the supernatural on ink stained, wrinkled pages. It certainly looked old, but you couldn’t help but think it was a scam. Some kid might have decided to replicate the look and feel of an ancient book, filling it with absolute nonsense that your best friend was clearing falling for. 

Unfortunately, once Kimi had gotten a hold of this book, she would not shut up about it. For the past week, you tried your best to feign interest in her new obsession as she flipped through pages, oohing and aahing at the sketches and descriptions of different types of demons. They ranged from little mischievous creatures to incubi and succubi and even a terrifying being that ate the souls of its prey.

For the most part, you think the book is absolutely absurd, but you can't ignore the tiny voice in your head that is just a little terrified about the potential existence of demons. Kimi had begged you nonstop to try one of the spells. You were hesitant and initially said no, but she kept begging you over and over again. Eventually you gave in because she was your best friend, and she was clearly excited about trying out the book with you. There is no harm in humoring her a little, right?

Kimi finishes lighting the five candles that surround the pentagram as you place a small bowl in the center.

“Alright!” Kimi says, clapping her hands. She looks at the open spell book next to her, double checking the instructions. “The only thing left is a drop of human blood.” Kimi looks at you expectantly.

You blink and point a finger at yourself. “Me?” you squeak. “But isn’t this your idea?”

“But you know how squeamish I get about pain and blood! Pretty pretty pleaassee,” your best friend begs.

You sigh. “Alright, alright. You owe me big time for this. Hand me the knife.” Kimi happily gives you the small knife that you had grabbed earlier from the kitchen. Scrunching your face, you make a tiny little cut on your index finger and squeeze one drop of blood into the bowl. You suck on your finger, hoping it would scab over quickly. “Ok, now what?”

Kimi turns the page. “Now we just have to say this incantation together. Come here.” You scoot over to sit next to your friend as she holds the book between the two of you. Together, you both recite the words scribbled down on the crumbled page.

You wait.

And wait.

And wait.

And nothing happens.

“Umm,” you break the awkward silence. “Nothing happened.”

“No, this can’t be right.” Kimi groans and starts aggressively flipping through the pages. “We followed the instructions exactly. It should have worked!”

Part of you feels relieved. You weren’t particularly thrilled about inviting the supernatural into your tiny apartment on a Friday night. Now you’re more convinced that the book really is a fake.

“What were we supposed to summon anyway?” you ask, a little curious.

Kimi frowns, still re-reading the instructions. “A creature named Sukuna Ryomen. Apparently he’s the king of all demons.”

Your mouth falls open in shock. “What the fuck, Kimi? The king? You chose to summon the king of all demons? What were you thinking? I thought we were going to summon those harmless creatures that steal people’s left socks or something like that!”

Kimi huffs. “Well, I did ask you what we should summon, but you said you didn’t care and that I should pick something. So I did!”

You rub your temples, trying to keep calm. “You’re right, you’re right. My bad. I’m sorry.” You could tell that Kimi is already quite upset that the spell didn’t work, and you were just adding fuel to the fire. “Hey! It’s ok. Let’s just take the rest of the night off. I’ll clean everything up, don’t worry about it. And listen, maybe we can try a different spell next week. Perhaps there’s not enough spiritual energy in this room or something to summon the big guy.”

Kimi perks up a little at your words. “We can try again next week? Really?”

You nod. “Promise. Take the book back to your place and choose something a little bit more tame, ok?”

Kimi giggles. “Ok, I promise too!” She grabs the book and carefully places it in her bag before getting up and heading towards the door. You follow her and give her a quick hug.

“Talk to you tomorrow,” you say.

“Yep! Good night!”

Once Kimi leaves your apartment, you let out a deep breath. You survey the mess on your living room floor with a frown. You truly love your best friend to death, but she’s just a little too adventurous for your tastes sometimes.

A sudden wave of lethargy washes over you, causing you to lean against your kitchen counter for support. You rub your eyes, struggling to keep them open as your eyelids start to feel unusually heavy. 

Weird.

It isn’t particularly late, so you are a bit surprised to feel so tired out of the blue. You figure the excitement of tonight’s activities likely got the best of you, so you decide to retire early for the night. Walking into the living room, you blow out all the candles around the pentagram before retreating into your bedroom. You will clean up everything tomorrow. No harm in letting it sit out for the night.

---

You wake up with a start. The darkness of your bedroom greets you. Groaning, you grab your phone in order to check the time but it was dead. You silently curse at yourself for forgetting to charge it before passing out. You lean back in your bed with a sigh. Normally, you sleep through the night undisturbed. You briefly wonder what had woken you up. 

Crash!

You instantly freeze and hold your breath. The noise came from the living room. It sounded like something had fallen. You try to calm your racing heart as you convince yourself that it was just one of your decorations falling off the wall. But you know you won’t be able to comfortably go back to sleep without checking, so you quietly slip out of bed and open your bedroom door. You peek into the living room, but you’re unable to make out anything clearly in the darkness. 

You fully step out of your bedroom and hit the light switch for the living room. Squinting your eyes, you try to adjust to the sudden brightness. Once your vision finally clears, you gasp. 

There’s someone in your living room.

The first thing you notice about the intruder is his tattoos. Intricate symbols mark his entire body, including his face.

The second thing you realize is that he’s completely naked.

You open your mouth to scream, but the intruder appears right in front of you within the blink of an eye and clamps his large hand over your mouth to shush you.

“Be quiet,” he growls deeply. “You can’t act so surprised. After all, you’re the one who called me here.”

You feel a chill crawl down your spine as your eyes widen in realization.

No. No. It can’t be.

Once the intruder is convinced you won’t start screaming, he removes his hand from your mouth. He stands back and takes in your appearance as you stand there numbly in your pajama shirt and shorts.

“A woman, huh.” He licks his lips. “I wasn’t expecting a woman to be the one to resurrect me, but I’m not complaining.”

This isn’t happening. This isn’t happening!

You try to convince yourself that you’re still dead asleep in your bed and dreaming about this entire encounter. There is no way that damn book actually worked!

“Ryomen Sukuna,” you whisper to yourself, suddenly recalling the name of the demon you tried to summon with Kimi.

You don’t miss the way his eyes light up. “Oh! You’ve heard of me!” He grins. “You should feel honored to be in the presence of the Great King of Demons.”

You shudder at his voice. There’s a certain aura of power, strength, and pure evil that you can feel radiating from the demon, but his appearance is still rather surprising. For the Great King of Demons, he looks rather...human. You could have easily mistaken him as a normal man who just really liked tattoos. No tail. No wings. No horns. Perhaps your view of demons was a bit outdated.

“I have to admit. I’m a little disappointed,” Sukuna says with a small frown, surveying his own body. “It seems you didn’t summon me correctly. My power is nowhere near what it should be, and it took me forever to spawn into this measly physical form. I normally have four arms and two faces.”

Your eyes bulge out of your head. Did he say four arms? And two faces?

The demon taps a finger on his chin in thought. “I did start off as a human before becoming a demon, so I guess it makes sense I’m reborn looking like a human at first.”

You silently thank your friend for messing up the ritual. If Sukuna had spawned immediately at full power, the two of you would have both been in danger. At least it’s only you in harm’s way. Kimi is safe and sound, far away from your tiny apartment.

“It’s ok,” Sukuna purrs, approaching you. “It doesn’t matter that you messed up the ritual a little. You can help me fix it now, pet.”

You stumble backwards, heart racing and body quivering in fear. He reaches out to place his hands on your shoulders, steadying you before pushing you against the wall. You instantly freeze, breath caught in your throat as you wonder what he’ll ask of you.

Sukuna lightly strokes your cheek with one hand. You want to recoil in fear and disgust, but your body remains frozen in horror.

“You haven’t noticed?” he asks. “It was your blood used in the summoning ritual. That means we are bonded.”

No. No.

Sukuna places two fingers underneath your chin and lifts them up so you look directly up into his eyes. You tremble uncontrollably as you meet his dark gaze.

“The way I regain my strength is by sucking the energy out of you. You might have noticed that you felt tired and sluggish after the ritual. That’s because the it took a lot of energy from you to give me a physical form. Don’t worry though, it’s not enough to kill you. But you are pretty weak, so it might take me awhile to regain my full strength.”

You gulp. The Great King of Demons at full strength? You know you have to prevent this from happening somehow, but your phone is dead, the book is gone, and Sukuna is not likely to let you leave his sight long enough for you to figure out a plan. Was it even possible to fight back against him? Maybe your best bet was to comply with his demands and hope he spares you.

“But there is a way to speed up the process.” He looks down at your body hungrily before leaning his head towards you until his lips hover over your left ear. “Sex,” he whispers huskily.

You stiffen slightly and try to ignore the spark that travels down your body and lights up your core.

“Wh-what do you mean?” you stammer nervously.

“I feed off your body’s energy, and everyone knows that there’s nothing more powerful than sexual energy. Sex gets your heart racing and blood pumping. It’s the perfect energy source for my complete resurrection.” Sukuna moves away from your ear and grins at your stricken face. “You are the one who summoned me here. It would be rude to not feed your guest and accommodate his needs.”

He places a thumb on your bottom lip, rubbing it back and forth. You try not to react, but your body won’t listen to you. Sukuna’s presence is overwhelming. His bare chest is practically pressed against your body. His eyes are dark with lust as he gazes at your face. His thumb continues to rub your lips which leaves you flustered. Your mind feels hazy, and your body feels unusually warm. A small, sane part of you tries to fight back. A little voice in your head reminds that this is the king of all demons. How could you fall for the literal embodiment of pure evil?

“I know you’re turned on,” Sukuna says smugly. You look away feeling absolutely mortified, but the demon grabs your head and forces you to look back at him. “Ah ah. Keep your eyes on me. No need to get embarrassed. Like I said before, I was resurrected from your blood, so we share a connection. This means I can feel your blood pumping in your own body, and I can tell exactly where it’s headed.” Sukuna drops his gaze down your body to emphasize his point. He doesn’t miss how your thighs suddenly clench together.

With a dangerous flash in his eyes, Sukuna hoists you over his shoulder and throws you on your bed. Before you could even think about saying no, Sukuna is on top of you harshly nipping and sucking at your neck. One hand is already underneath your shirt, fondling one of your breasts and playing with your hard nipple. He sucks at a particularly sensitive spot on your neck which leaves you moaning shamelessly underneath him. Any doubts or reservations immediately leave your mind. 

Your body feels like it’s on fire being this close to Sukuna. He chuckles darkly, leaving your neck and pulling out his hand from underneath your skirt. “That’s my good pet,” he purrs. “So eager just for me.” Sukuna kisses you roughly, leaving you gasping as you try to match his fervor. Eventually he leans back and admires how swollen your lips look after his harsh treatment. Your pupils are blown wide with lust. With Sukuna’s face hovering just above yours, you can’t help but admire his unique markings. Without realizing, you reach a hand out and start tracing the lines on his cheek. Sukuna stills for a moment, enjoying your tender touch. 

The moment of gentleness shatters when Sukuna rips open your shirt with his bare hands. He immediately latches onto one of your breasts with his mouth and roughly gropes the other. You grip the back of his head, digging your fingers in his short hair. He bites down a little too sharply on your nipple, causing you to yelp in slight pain. Sukuna lightly chuckles at your reaction and finally pulls away, giving your now sore breasts a break. He suddenly flips your positions so that you are now hovering over him as his back hits the bed.

You stare at his chiseled chest and can’t resist rubbing your hands up and down his prominent muscles. Sukuna observes you with an amused look as you openly admire his body. 

“You like what you see?” he smirks.

You ignore the question and begin peppering light kisses down his chest and over his abs. The demon hums, enjoying your soft touch all over his body. However, he eventually has enough of your teasing. He pushes your head down until you’re forced to look at something you’ve tried to avoid glancing at the entire night. Your heart flutters with a little nervousness as you’re greeted with Sukuna’s dick. It’s long and thick with just the slightest curve. You wonder how you’re going to be able to handle his impressive size.

Sukuna can sense your hesitation, so he decides to give you a little push. He grabs your hair roughly and brings your face closer to his throbbing dick. “Be a good girl and open wide.” With a shaky breath, you take the tip of Sukuna’s cock into your mouth. He’s so thick that you can barely fit him in your mouth. With the demon’s hand still on your head, he coaxes you take him in deeper and you oblige. Sukuna groans as your hot, wet mouth takes more and more of his length. You look so good with your lips wrapped around his cock. 

You start to bob your head up and down to Sukuna’s delight, but he’s rather annoyed at your languid pace. “Too slow,” he growls and that’s the only warning you get before the demon jerks his hips up sharpy. You gag as his dick hits the back of your throat, but Sukuna's firm grasp on your head keeps you in place. He tightens his grip and then begins to roughly thrust into your mouth. You try to relax your throat and keep your composure even as tears start to fall from your eyes as the demon ruthlessly fucks your face.

“You feel so good,” Sukuna groans. “You were made to take my dick.” A particularly rough thrust leaves you gagging again and drooling all over his cock. “Fuck yea, just like that.”

Once the demon is satisfied, he releases his grip on your hair and you immediately pull back to catch your breath. You wipe the spit from your mouth and the tears from your eyes, panting heavily from the rough treatment. Sukuna silently admires the way your breasts look against your heaving chest.

“Take the rest of your clothes off,” he demands. You shakily get off the bed and shimmy out of your pajama shorts. As you roll down your underwear, Sukuna doesn’t miss how it’s already drenched with your arousal. As you climb back on the bed, Sukuna roughly places you underneath him once again. He spreads open your legs and presses a finger against your entrance to test your wetness.

“Damn,” Sukuna growls. “You’re this wet from choking on my cock.” You moan in relief as you finally feel some friction against your throbbing core. “A good little whore just for me.”

The demon strokes your folds at a leisurely pace which drives you insane. You unconsciously grind against his hand, silently begging him to pick up the tempo, but Sukuna just chuckles and continues to tease you. He barely brushes your swollen clit with each stroke, causing you to whine in frustration.

“Please,” you whimper.

Sukuna raises his eyebrows with a smirk. “Please what?” He suddenly stops his ministrations to your immediate displeasure.

You bite your lip feeling slightly embarrassed, but you decide to swallow whatever pride you have left. “T-touch me. I want to feel you. I n-need to feel you.”

“Only because you asked so sweetly,” Sukuna hums. He finally rubs his thumb over your throbbing clit, and you immediately cry out as pleasure wracks your body. The demon’s touch becomes faster and rougher, leaving you a writhing mess underneath him. Just as you’re about to hit your climax, Sukuna pulls away and you can’t stop the frustrated whine that leaves your mouth. He strokes his dick amused by your reaction and leans down to whisper in your ear. “Wouldn’t it feel better to cum around my cock? Come on. Tell me that’s what you want, pet.”

The fire between your legs only grows as you listen to his words. Desperate for any sort of release, you beg for Sukuna’s cock. “P-please fuck me. I need your dick so badly. Please please please.”

Sukuna answers your pleas by lining his cock against your sopping entrance before pushing into you in one go. You groan at the slight burn as your walls stretch around his wide girth, but you’re so wet he manages to slide his entire length into you without much resistance. Once he’s fully sheathed, the feeling is completely overwhelming. You feel absolutely stuffed to the brim with his giant cock pulsing inside you.

“Oh my god,” you breath. “You’re so big. Fuck.”

Sukuna doesn’t give you much chance to adjust to his size as he immediately pulls out until only his tip remains before ramming back into you at full force. You yelp at the sudden movement, while the demon softly groans. He sets a brutal pace that leaves you absolutely breathless. With every snap of his hips, you can feel yourself getting closer and closer to the edge. Your toes curl in pleasure, and you rake your nails down his muscular back as the demon fucks you senseless.

“You’re so fucking tight,” Sukuna growls as you continue to moan and whimper wantonly underneath him. When the head of his cock hits that sensitive spot inside you at just the right angle, the tension in your body finally snaps and a wave of pleasure completely washes over you. You cry out as you reach your climax, squeezing your eyes shut as you surrender yourself to the sensations of pure bliss.

Once you start to come down from your high, Sukuna pulls out of you and adjusts your body so that you’re on your hands and knees. Your arms are still quivering from your orgasm but you have just enough strength to keep yourself from collapsing. Both you and Sukuna groan as he enters you once again. He somehow fucks you even harder than before. The lewd, wet noises of your bodies slamming against one of another fill the bedroom. Sukuna grips your waist with such force as he slams into you over and over again that you know you’ll wake up with nasty bruises tomorrow. In this position, it feels like his cock is pushing even deeper inside you at such a brutal pace.

“You going to cum on my cock again?” Sukuna pants. He slaps your ass, and you squeak at the unexpected sting. “Answer the question, pet.” He gives you another slap.

“Oh god, yes,” you gasp as your cunt clenches around him. “F-fuck. Your cock feels s-so good.” Satisfied with your answer, Sukuna reaches around to rub your clit. It was just the right amount of extra stimulation you needed to reach your climax again. Your body shudders as you lose yourself to the white hot pleasure. Sukuna pulls out of you, and you immediately collapse on the bed.

“Who said we were done yet, pet?” The demon picks you up and places you on top of him as he lays back on the bed. You instinctively wrap your arms around his neck as your hard nipples rub against his chest. You can feel his still erect cock poking at your entrance. “I want to watch your face as I fill you up with my cum.” 

You wince as he slips back into you. You’re already starting to feel overstimulated and sore, but Sukuna hasn’t shown any signs of slowing down yet. He ruts into your limp body, only concerned about chasing his own pleasure.

You don’t think it’s possible for you to cum again, but Sukuna’s cock is continuing to hit all the right places. The pain from overstimulation only seems to egg you on further as you feel the familiar tension building within your body once again. Sukuna groans as your walls start to clench down on him. His thrusts become more erratic as he approaches his own release. 

As he continues to pound into you as you’re splayed across his chest, the demon tells you about all the humans he’ll kill once he’s at full power. Not even women or children will be safe from his destruction. He’ll lay siege to all Japan, perhaps even the world. Sukuna mentions how the golden age of demons will begin once again. 

You begin crying, but you can’t even tell if it’s from the overstimulation, the shame of letting him use you like this, or the guilt of bringing such a horrifying demon back to Earth. With one more rough thrust, you come undone again for the third time during the night. Sukuna follows right after you, pumping you full of his cum. There’s so much that you can already feel his seed leaking out of you.

Sukuna remains still, trying to catch his breath as you quietly sob against his chest. The demon rubs your head with surprising tenderness. 

“Don’t worry, pet. I promise I’ll spare you,” Sukuna says. “You’re mine now. No one else will ever touch you again.”

You hiccup through your tears as Sukuna’s words fill you with dread. It’s all your fault. He’s going to be reborn at full power and wipe out human civilization because of you. The guilt tears at your heart.

What have you done?

Sukuna can already feel his power returning to him. It’s only a matter of time before he’ll be unstoppable. Perhaps a couple of more days of indulging himself with your body will get the job done. He rubs your back, feeling how your sobs rack your body. Your tears only amuse him. Just another sign of how weak humans really are.

“Get ready for the new age, pet. And it’s all thanks to you.”

[russianguyreactstothings]

black widow (2021): 4/10

i...dude.

my poor best friend had to sit next to me while we watched this and listen to me complain over every single “russian” thing the main characters tried to say. i don’t know how it’s possible, but i honestly don’t think marvel hired an language coach for scarlett johansson or florence pugh (and if they did, good for that person for scamming marvel bc they did Nothing for that paycheck).

accents:

scarlett johansson sounds passable. natasha romanoff isn’t supposed to sound particularly russian (she’s a spy, she speaks several languages, she’s fluent in english), so they didn’t have much to do for this one. she sounds like an american person. if i heard her speak in real life and she said she’s russian, i’d believe her. 

rachel weisz actually did a pretty good job! her character has a relatively thick russian accent, probably because they meet her in russia where she’s been living for a while (she’s also a spy like natasha but doesn’t have the same american accent...and all the characters speak in heavily accented english instead of just. speaking russian.. but of course you can’t have your american audience read subtitles for longer than 5 seconds or they might leave a bad letterbox review of a marvel movie so i digress). her accent sounds very good! she has the typical overpronounced vowels but she doesn’t roll her r’s or mispronounces the ‘th’ sound, which was very refreshing (most russian people who learn english do know how to say ‘r’ and ‘th’ properly but the overall cadence still sounds off for other reasons). she sounds like my mom honestly, id think she was russian

david harbour.....ehhhhh. he sounds like someone picked russian as the accent for their dnd character and is now just trying their best to get along. he ranges from passable to pretty fucking bad. (also, pet peeve but it’s aleXEI, not aLExei as everyone insists on saying it, dont mispronounce your own name mr guardian come on now)

listen i love florence pugh. she’s a great actress, she can do lots of things well, a russian accent just isn’t one of them. she’s trying way too hard to get the r sounds and it just sounds really overdone and fake. i still quote the “don’t say zat vai vould you say zat it was real to me!” line to my friends. just girl...stop

actual russian:

shoutout to the one extra who was slavic and had one line and pronounced it perfectly. there’s one in every marvel movie, i hope he’s having a good day.

the main cast??? no. absolutely not. the dialogue between natasha and yelena in actual russian was fucking incomprehensible, i wouldn’t have known what they were saying if it wasn’t for the subtitles and like. its supposed to be russian. i speak russian. come on now.

there were featured extras (like the guys in the prison admin) who spoke russian and i could understand it but it was very accented which just makes me wonder why marvel doesn’t hire actual russian actors for the extras like surely it doesn’t matter who the extras are, nobody cares (except me), just hire slavic people who can say the lines correctly. then again, i guess if the extras sounded good it’d bring more attention to how shit the main cast sounds

movie as a whole:

we’ve all seen this before. morally grey russian characters who are spies and working to take down the american government because cold war scary russians. their backstory is that they were raised by Evil Government Man in rooms with cement walls where little girls are taught ballet and how to put together kalashnikovs. 

i get it, russia works great as a boogeyman and a grey filter background for whatever kind of criminal activity past you wanna give the only slavic character on the avengers. but if you’re going to use russia as a backdrop to be Angsty and Aesthetic, at least do the due diligence and get the language right. i can understand not using any of the culture, maybe it wouldn’t have fit into the story, but the accents and the spoken language being wrong just makes this whole thing feel like an insult to me.

like “oh this is what russians are like” portrayed by people who clearly don’t care enough to put in the time to pronounce their 2 lines correctly? really? i know a lot of people are pissed off at russia, rightfully so, but you shouldn’t put your whole story in a country different from yours and then do it this badly. i really like black widow as a character, particularly in the comics, and i love me a russian superhero, this was just really disappointing.

[randomshyperson]

The Scarlet Witch Prophecy - Chapter 23 - The Witch's Cabin (Part Two)

Thanks to my gif maker and friend of course, @abimess.

Summary: As the youngest daughter of Howard Stark, you have ordinary expectations for your years at Hogwarts. Little do you know what adventures await you when your destiny is intertwined with the legendary Scarlet Witch.

Warnings: +16. Adaptation of the Harry Potter Saga, Magical Thematic, Prophecies, Mentions of Violence, Torture and dark magic, Language (swearing and minor/major offenses), manipulation of will, Underage kissing, insinuation of smut with minors, Smut (overage), descriptions of death, aggression, obscurity, angst, fluffy, soulmates analogies. || Chapter Warnings: +18, smut.

Series Masterlist ||  Read on AO3 || All Works Masterlist

Chapter 23 - Part XXIII - The Witch's Cabin (Part Two)

You weren't sure if Wanda wanted some time from you as well, as you watched her walk through the garden, sit alone on one of the benches while looking at the rocky mountains in the distance.

What you were sure of was that she was distressed. So much so, that even as she blocked out her emotions, strands of her discomfort escaped, and you felt your body shiver slightly.

Sighing, you put your hands in your pockets, resisting the urge to join her as you watched her from the balcony.

"Here, Miss." It is Charles who says beside you, with a mug of reheated tea. You raise your eyebrow in confusion, and he smiles tenderly. "I thought a hot drink would bring you some comfort." He explains, and you mutter a thank you as you accept the cup.

Charles stands beside you, watching the landscape in silence for a moment. When you take the first sip, and sigh lightly, he asks, "Did it help?"

"Not much." You reply. "I appreciate the intention, but I won't feel good over tea until she is."

It's a simple statement. And Charles just murmurs in understanding, not needing you to explain further.

There is another pause, before he speaks again.

"Then I think you should talk to her." He says.

"She said she needed some time alone." You retort, scratching the back of your head with your hand quickly, and placing the cup on the large one on the balcony. "I'm giving her space."

"Oh, I see." He murmurs. "Are you sure that the alone time included her protector?"

You give a short humorless laugh. "You know, people have weird ideas about this whole thing. We're still two separate people. Wanda can have her time without me."

"Of course she can." Charles agrees quickly. "Forgive me, I think I expressed myself badly. I didn't mean to say that you two aren't independent, or to put me on the same level as sensationalist wizards who don't know anything about ancient magic." He speaks, causing you to frown. "I only meant that it is my understanding that scarlet witches and their patrons have a special relationship. If I remember correctly, it is written that the patrons bring a profound sense of safety and comfort to their sorceresses when present."

You feel your cheeks flush, and you look away quickly. Charles doesn't seem to notice, or if he does, he says nothing.

"So...do you think she'll like it if I talk to her?"

" Well, she's your sorceress, you know her better than I do, Miss Stark." Jokes the man. "Don't let an old book tell you what you must or mustn't do."

You bite the inside of your cheek, lingering your gaze on the crestfallen figure of Wanda meters ahead.

"Thanks for the tea, Charles." You mutter before starting to walk toward the gardens.

To avoid frightening her, you make a noise with your steps, but Wanda only lifts her head when you are practically at her side.

And you swallow dryly when you notice the tears on her face, approaching calmly to sit beside her.

You don't have to say anything really, and you don't mind waiting for her to tell you whatever she needs to. But Wanda just waits for you to sit down, and then she leans against your body, sinking into your embrace as you run your hands around her.

She relaxes immediately with your touch, sighing. You think Charles was right after all.

Her tears cease, drying against your shirt, and she inhales deeply against you.

“Thank you.” She whispers, making you smile shyly, as you run your fingers through her hair.

"For what?" you whisper back, half-joking, not knowing exactly what you've done.

"For staying."

You sigh, hugging her tighter as your fingers gently scratch the back of her neck, and Wanda shivers against you, before relaxing completely. "I told you I'm never leaving."

You stand like that for a few more moments, until Wanda starts to move again. She pulls her face away to look at you, and you just smile at the intense way she does so.

"I'm sorry." She says, and you frown in confusion. She straightens up before continuing, taking a deep breath, as if she is finding the right words. "With everything Agatha showed us, I finally understood that I never had a choice on my fate. And before, when I was going to erase your memory, how angry you got, I didn't understand why. Because to me, I was making the right thing, sparing you somehow. But now, I understand." She confesses quickly, gesturing as her eyes fill with tears. "It was your choice. And I don't think you would ever forgive me if I moved on without you, when you chose to stay with me. And as much as I hate how dangerous this is, and I don’t want you to get hurt, you have the right to choose to stay by my side if you want, because those are your feelings and I had no right to try to take them away from you."

You nod, sighing, and raise your hand to her face, caressing her cheek.

"It's okay, darling." You say. "I haven't been angry in quite some time. But I appreciate that you apologized."

You move closer, kissing her softly on the lips before pulling away. "I guess in the end I broke my promise about not touching you before the apology." You joke making her smile. "I couldn't help it, you're just too irresistible."

Wanda laughs shyly, raising her hands to your neck, looking at you fondly.

"Do you want to talk about what we saw?" You ask next, and she sighs, nodding.

You spend the next few minutes talking. Wanda feels bad about the whole thing. About all the lies, schemes, and about never having had a real choice. No matter what would happen, she was always going to become the Scarlet Witch. And no one asked if she wanted that.

She didn't talk about Natalya, and you respected her time.

"I don't think I'll ever be able to forgive Agatha completely for the things she did." Wanda confesses a moment later, you two are sitting side by side, looking at the mountains. "But a part of me will never be able to hate her entirely. And I detest that."

"It doesn't bother me that she matters to you, Wanda." You say. "Even with everything that happened, she really believed she was doing the right thing. And now she's helping us. And I know you've spent a lot more time with her than I have." You clarify quickly, and Wanda looks at you with a slight frown. "I just mean that even with the pain she caused me, it's okay for you to still care about her. I won't hold a grudge over it."

Wanda nods, reaching your hand up on the bench. She entwines your fingers together, and moves closer to lean against you, resting her head on your shoulder.

"Can we stay here just a little longer?" She whispers. The sunrise is approaching. You were going to say you would stay as long as she wanted, but your speech becomes a yawn halfway through, and she laughs softly. "Maybe the bed would be better."

You laugh softly too, and Wanda squeezes your hand before moving to pull you back into the house.

When you go through the kitchen, Agatha is there. She and Wanda exchange a look, but neither of them says anything, and you just follow the brunette in front of you upstairs.

You think you'll sleep until lunchtime at least.

//-//-//-//-//-//

You grunted in pain as you fell to the ground.

"Everything okay there, Stark?" Agatha's softly teasing voice made you give a wry laugh.

"Perfect." You grumbled as you stood up, wiping the dust from your pants. "Again please, and try something stronger this time, Agatha, I think you're starting to go soft on me."

The witch laughed, raising her wand quickly. The next spell hurt more than the first.

It had been eight and a half weeks since you had been in Agatha's house.

Things were going well, if you could put it that way.

After that day when Agatha showed the memories out of the pensieve, she and Wanda were on thin ice, and no memories were shared again. They treated each other politely, with occasional sharp pins, but nothing ever too aggressive.

Meanwhile, Agatha was really helping the two of you to become better sorcerers.

You think you never learned so much magic at once, but you weren't complaining.

Even Charles was helping you with potions, a passion he seemed to share with Erik.

And with the intensity of your studies, Agatha hoped that soon you would be worthy of pulling Rowena's diadem out of the hat, but she never seemed to find the right spot, and it was making everyone slightly frustrated, even if no one would admit it.

You haven't heard from the order.

With Fury's death, the radio went silent. You believed that no one but him had been arrested, or killed, because nothing was said in the Daily Prophet. But it wasn't easy to ignore the tightness in your chest at not knowing for sure.

Now that you were practically considering yourself a master at dueling, even if Agatha wouldn't admit that you had far more knowledge in defense against the dark arts than any other witch your age, you expected her to continue the lessons in Occlumency and Legilimency that Erik never managed to finish.

"You're not ready for that yet." She replied, for the third time you brought up the subject, and you sighed impatiently.

"But professor-"

"Erik taught you the basic level of that magic, Y/N." She interrupts, moving her hands so that the objects in the kitchen begin to prepare lunch around you. Wanda is in the house library, studying with Charles, and you had spent all morning practicing dueling spells, and learning to become more resistant to them as well.

Your whole body was sore from the times you fell to the ground when you were hit by stupefy and the most common duelling spells , but it was better than being knocked out at the first attempt if you had never practiced before.

"A master of legilimency would be able to dominate the minds of an entire city at once. You're not ready for that kind of magic yet."

"But I don't need to control an entire city, Agatha." You argue back, following her through the kitchen around the house. "You can just continue from where Erik started and-"

"Enough." She interrupts by turning to you, but she doesn't look angry, just impatient. "You won't leave me alone if I don't agree won't you?"

"No."

She sighs. "I can teach you Occlumency, Stark. But I won't teach you Legilimency, it's...against my vows."

You frown in confusion, "Your vows?"

But Agatha gives you only an insinuating look, and you understand.

As Legilimency is directly considered a forbidden, and dark magic, it would break her vow to only do the right thing by the scarlet witch, her promise to Natalya.

You've never been more curious to know how Agatha got around the perpetual vow for so many years, but the way she’s back walking tells you she's not going to share that with you anytime soon.

"Charles is a master legilimens." She continues talking, moving downstairs where the library is. You in her trail. "He can teach you."

"Really? That 's great!."

As you arrive at the study room, the huge piles of enchanted books surrounding you, your gaze immediately seeks Wanda's.

As Agatha tells Charles to teach you, you approach the girl, finding her distracted with a reading. You smile at how lovely she looks, and can't help but move quickly closer, and steal a surprise kiss from her that makes her sigh.

"Hey, you." You say as you pull away, and she giggles as she relaxes.

"Hey, you." She repeats as she stops you from moving away by holding you by your arm, pulling you back to kiss you properly.

"Hey little love birds, your first lesson in Occlumency is going to be tonight." Agatha warns in a tone of teasing, as you give an embarrassed chuckle breaking away from Wanda, leaning on the pilaster next to the chair she is sitting in. "And you, Miss Maximoff, can practice your natural legilimency skills with Charles on the same schedule as well."

"Yes, ma'am." You and Wanda answer together, and Agatha gives a warning sneer before turning, squeezing Charles' shoulder gently before leaving.

The man turns to you. "Miss Stark, please do not spill mud on my parchments."

You look down to your clothes immediately. Well, it wasn't your fault that Agatha had knocked you to the ground so many times. You were a mess, and you raised your hands in a sign of surrender.

"Sorry, Charles." You mutter as you walk away. "I just came to give my beautiful girl a kiss, I'm going upstairs to take a shower. See you two at lunch."

You give Wanda a wink of goodbye before walking away, being careful not to bump into books along the way.

//-//-//-//

You grumbled softly in pain as you removed your tangled sweater, realizing that perhaps you should have asked Agatha to go easy on the spells instead of challenging her.

Distracted, you startled when you heard knocking on the bathroom door, but relaxed completely when you saw that it was only Wanda, who smiled and leaned against the doorframe, looking up at you.

"Hey, babe." You greeted her, working to remove your shoes. "Do you want anything?"

"No, I just decided to take a break from the books." She replies. "But I would like to know how you convinced Agatha to teach you Occlumency so easily." She comments in a mixed tone of teasing and impressiveness and you laugh softly as you kick your untied shoes away.

"With my charm of course." You return, making her laugh.

When you motion to remove the shirt, Wanda bites her lips. "Allow me."

You stand still then as she steps up to your front, looking at you with the same tenderness that you look back.

Wanda works on the buttons of your shirt, and when she is finished, she pushes the material away, sliding it down your arms until it falls to the floor. You blush slightly under her curious gaze, but say nothing, letting her move the straps of your bra, and then open the clasp, soon the garment falls too.

She moves her fingers down your waist, to reach the zipper and buttons of your pants, and unzips them. You move timidly to remove the item as well, taking your panties with it.

Wanda gives a soft giggle, and you look at her curiously.

"What?"

"It's nothing." She says shyly. "It's...I just realized that it's the first time I've seen you naked."

You blush, but respond. "I wish I wasn't covered in dirt."

"I wish you weren't covered in bruises." She retorts sharply, and you swallow dryly. The purple marks around your body are a result of the spells, but you don't care about that. The pain isn't exactly strange after all.

"It was worth it, though." You retort softly, and think that part of you is really referring to getting stronger, learning new magic. But the other part, the part that knows it's all for the girl in front of you, adds, "You're worth all the effort."

Wanda looks away, swallowing dryly as well. "Don't say that."

"It's the truth, Wanda." You say simply, and she sighs, straightening her posture softly.

"But you don't have to say it."

"You want me to lie then?"

"I just don't want you to say it so proudly." She retorts almost scoldingly, and you bite the inside of your cheek, not wanting to argue. She sighs, and puts distance between you, turning toward the exit.

You clear your throat, and call out to her. "I don't want you to be angry." You murmur. "I can't help it to say things like this, you know that."

Her expression softens. "I'm not angry, darling." She assures you. "I'll just get a towel for myself."

She leaves before you understand what that implies. Wishing you didn't look like a complete mess, you quickly step into the tub you left ready as soon as you arrived in the bathroom, and sink against the hot water, waiting for Wanda to join you.

Wanda doesn't take long. She leaves the towel in the sink, and smiles at you before she starts to undress, right there in front of you, as if she had done it a thousand times before.

You blush, but don't look away. And she doesn't seem to mind that you follow every movement of her hands, although her cheeks redden when she has her breasts exposed in the air.

Soon, she steps into the tub with you, taking the seat in the opposite corner, smiling softly as you hug your legs, looking up at her.

"I'm sorry I said that, I know you don’t like it and I shouldn’t have." You mutter. But Wanda just shakes her head, steeling herself to move closer, her hands touching your forearms.

"Don't worry." She says. "It's the truth after all. You are my knight in shining armor, and I can't do anything to change that."

You laugh softly, and Wanda smiles, stroking your skin with her thumb.

"I want to try something." She says next, making you look at her curiously. "Something I read about it this week. Can I?"

"Of course, darling." You say, and then she is pulling your forearms gently so that you stop hugging your legs, and you sink your hands into the water, waiting, as Wanda moves her fingers, guiding you so that you sit properly, and she sits between your legs. "What are you going to do?"

You ask curiously, even half embarrassed to have her so close, but Wanda just smiles, moving her hands out of the tub, where she makes the soap magically fly to her.

"First, I'm helping you get clean, babe."

She says, dipping the soap in the water before bringing it to your skin, lathering your shoulders gently. You relax under her touch, looking at her intently.

"Can I do the same to you?" you ask in a whisper, and she smiles.

"Of course."

Wanda raises the soap at face height, and with a flick of her hands, the item doubles itself to another. You raise your eyebrow. "Show-off." You tease, making her chuckle, as she hands you the other soap.

For the next few minutes, you help each other soap up amidst giggles, and stolen glances. Wanda's touch is as gentle and affectionate as her gaze, and you are so comfortable that you don't even have time to think about how intimate the whole moment is.

As you finish washing off the soap, Wanda begins to run her fingers along your shoulders. "Will you stay on your back for me?" She asks lowly, and you murmur in agreement before shifting to obey.

Without seeing her, your curiosity makes you tense up, and Wanda smiles as she moves closer, her hands on your waist. "Relax, darling." She asks against your ear, her fingers moving up your skin slowly as you obey.

"Do you remember last summer?" She begins, and suddenly you are feeling soft twinges on your skin. It's Wanda's magic. You don't know what she's doing, but it feels good. Little shocks around your back.

You just murmur, relaxing against her hand.

"When Papa taught you about mirroring magic, I mean." She continues, her tone low and soft. "So that you could take my damage from possible attacks."

"And you were so upset about my wrist breaking when you fell off a broom that you put me to sleep in Pietro's bed." You complete making her laugh.

"But I didn't send you away because I still wanted you in my house." She retorts and you laugh in agreement.

"Yes I do, darling." You say next. "I remember everything I went through with you."

Wanda bites her lips, blushing at your statement. But she continues to talk beyond that.

"There is another kind of spell like that." She says. "Charles was reading with me a line that said If the protector can take the pain, the witch must learn to heal the pain as well. You understand what I mean?"

You sigh softly as you feel the pressure of her fingers increase on the points where you knew you were injured. But it's not discomfort that you feel. It's a different sensation, like an electric shiver that turns into a gentle tightness.

"Yeah, I think so. You'll be able to heal my wounds now, right?" You ask with your eyes closed, instinctively leaning even closer against her hand as the pressure increases, and Wanda just murmurs in agreement, concentrating on her task. "That's pretty cool."

"I still need to learn it properly." She continues. "And I don't want to have to practice."

You chuckle softly at the comment. Of course she doesn't. For her to learn to heal your wounds, you would need to hurt her so she gets to practice, and that possibility is horrible for Wanda.

"I'm sure we'll find an alternative to that, Wands." You murmur lazily, so relaxed against her touch that you begin to feel sleepy.

Wanda continues for a few more minutes, and when she finishes, she goes around your waist with her hands pulling you gently against her, making you sigh.

"How do you feel?" She asks with her face resting on your shoulder, her arms hugging you as you relax against her.

"I feel incredible, love." You reply with your eyes closed. "Thanks to your magic fingers."

Wanda giggles, turning her face to kiss your neck, her lips touching your skin softly and making you smile and sigh.

"Can I make you feel even better?" She asks as she returns her mouth to your ear, playing with the lobe between her lips and teeth, making you hold your breath. "I could use my magic fingers."

You bite back a smile, nodding. Wanda inhales softly, settling herself better against the tub.

Her hands go around your belly with her fingertips, moving upward. You gasp when she reaches your breasts, stimulating your nipples between her fingers.

You let out a satisfied murmur, and your body gradually warms up.

When your nipples are hardened enough, and Wanda has you shivering, she wraps your breasts with her full hands, pressing the flesh against her palm, and you gasp, throwing your hips forward unter water.

"Wanda." You sigh softly as she continues to play with your breasts. "Don't tease."

"I'm not teasing darling." She murmurs back, returning the gentle caress against your nipples. "I'm just getting you wet."

"Just... touch me." You whisper, starting to move back into her, the tightness in your belly growing, and all she did was touch you softly. "Please."

Wanda lets out a sigh, like a giggle, and you don't have to look at her to know she's smiling. "I didn't know you were the begging type, babe."

You grumble under the teasing, but Wanda finally lowers her hands, and you shiver in anticipation, forgetting to respond.

She runs her hands down your inner thighs, but never where you want her. And when you sigh impatiently, she chuckles against your ear.

"Say pretty please again." She teases and you feel your cheeks burn, quickly turning your face to the left, putting distance between her mouth and your ear. All Wanda does is chuckles again, but this time, her fingers go straight to where you want her, caressing your entrance and you gasp.

“M-more.” You ask but she just stands still, her fingertips against your clint while her mouth kisses your shoulder and her other hand goes up to your breast, to repeat the moviments from earlier.

You have trouble keeping your eyes open, and when you try to force her finger against you, she just moves them away with a giggle while you grumble of dissatisfaction.

“Wanda.” You warn, but her hand just rests against your thigh.

“C’mon, babe.” She says. “You sounded so hot when you said please. Do it again.”

“No.” You retort stubbornly, but your affected tone makes her smile, her fingers moving closer to your warm center but still not touching and making you clench your closed fists.

"Say, please fuck me." Wanda whispers against your ear, and you feel a sharp, tightly pulsation in your belly, sighing heavily. "And I will."

But you didn't want to give Wanda a taste of victory, even as you came so close to begging for her touch. All you did was press hard against her, your ass fitted against her hot core, and she gasped in surprise and arousal, digging her nails into your thigh.

"Cheater." She murmured breathlessly, making you smile, but your advantage was short-lived when she pressed your breast into her palm, and without any warning, slid a finger into you, entering easily through both the water in the tub and your arousal.

"Oh." You moaned loudly, one hand gripping the edge of the tub as Wanda moved slowly inside, making you squirm. "More, babe. Please."

Wanda chuckles at your hopeless tone, but obeys, inserting another finger now. It slides between your edges with ease, and you bite your lips to avoid being loud. But when Wanda presses her palm against your clit as her fingers move in and out of you in a slow, torturous rhythm, you whimper, squeezing your hands on the edge of the tub until they turn white.

"You're so tight." Wanda whispers against your ear, her hot, wet breath sending shivers throughout your body. "My sexy baby taking my fingers so well."

You moan softly, becoming even more aroused by Wanda's words. She sighs against your ear, quickening the pace of her thrusts, and you begin to feel the tightness under your belly reaching the limit.

"W-wanda... I'm clos-oh" You can't maintain a coherent sentence, thrusting your hips in the same rhythm as Wanda's fingers move in and out of you, and Wanda grunts against your ear, her fingers sinking into you.

"Show me how it feels, Printsessa" She asks and you need to concentrate beyond pure pleasure to be able to share your sensations with her. When you do, Wanda moans loudly against your ear, the hand on your breast squeezing firmly, pulling you against her and making you gasp. "Is this how you feel with me, baby?” She asks with a breathless whisper. “It’s so fucking good." She whimpers, increasing the pace of her fingers, and now stimulating both you and herself, and you use your free hand to keep yourself from screaming, knowing that the noise would attract the attention of the other residents.

"I can't hold it." You whimper, your body beginning to spasm out of rhythm with the strokes, you are so close.

"So don't." She gasps back against your ear, and it's the next second that you come, your walls clenching against Wanda's fingers, and you see stars, your loud moan is muffled by her hand on your mouth when you can't keep the gesture and clench your hands under the water.

And you are barely recovering from your orgasm when Wanda reaches hers, sharing it with you, and you moan deeply, turning a complete mess against her, feeling your body explode with pleasure again.

You stand in silence, trying to normalize your breaths, Wanda's fingers slip out of you, making you sigh, but she keeps her hand on your thigh, until she joins the two at your waist, smoothing you better against her.

"I can't feel my legs." You mumble breathlessly, your body tingling completely from the intensity of the orgasms. Wanda just gives an equally affected laugh, moving one of her hands up to push her wet hair out of the front of her face.

"Too bad, I still want to taste you."

You grunt softly, feeling your face heat up. But you sure as hell won't protest when Wanda's hands start coming down again.

//-//-//-//-//-//

“It really worked.” You murmurs impressed, as you button a clear shirt up, getting ready for having some food since you and Wanda skipped lunch, being busy with things. The bruises that you once had, are all gone. A few red spots were seen, but nothing too remarkable as before.

Wanda bites her bottom lip, kneeling in the bed, still naked. The vision was a gift from heaven you could say.

“If you feel any pain, tell me.” She asks as she watches you dressing. “I could try to ease that too.”

“You’re too good for me baby.” You commented with a shy smile, getting closer to her again. Agatha liked well dressed manners, she said. That’s why almost every set of clothes she gave you had ties, and sweaters. You and Wanda teased her about being old.

And that's why you're knotting your tie, and Wanda is unbuttoning your shirt. Wait, what?

"Hey, hey." You quickly warn, holding up her fingers, as Wanda giggles with her gaze gleaming in mischief. "We can't stay here all day, sweetheart."

"Can’t we?" She retorts in a mixed tone of defiance, making a pout that makes you want to kiss her.

"You know we can't." You retort with a smile, caressing her cheek before buttoning the buttons she has opened. Wanda bites her lips as she watches you. "I can bring you something to eat, but eventually we have lessons."

"No, that's okay, I'll come down with you." She says but doesn't move from her spot, and you raise an eyebrow curiously, but Wanda was just waiting for you to finish buttoning your shirt before pulling you up by your poorly tied tie, rising to kiss you on the mouth.

You smiled against her lips, bringing one of your hands to her neck, kissing her firmly.

"Are you sure we need to go downstairs?" She murmurs breathlessly against your mouth, and you sigh.

"Maybe another ten minutes."

It takes another half hour for you to leave the room.

Wanda accompanies you, straightening your crumpled clothes before you head to the kitchen.

Fortunately, Charles had saved some lunch for you, and between smiles and stolen glances, you ate in silence.

And when Agatha asked you to join her upstairs, for her occlumency lesson, Wanda kissed you on the cheek and wished you good luck.

Agatha's private study room was dark.

Unlike the library, or Charles' offices, which were extremely cozy.

Here, you felt almost intimidated. But Agatha seemed relaxed, and you felt confident enough with your magic to enter.

"You know the fundamentals, Miss Stark, so let's not stall." She says as she walks over to one of the cabinets, working to remove her rings and place them on the wood. "Sit back and relax. And know that I'm going to try the real thing, Y/N. Just like an opponent would."

You swallow dryly, but murmur in understanding, walking over to sit in the armchair that Agatha seems to have left ready for you.

She turns around, and takes the seat in front of you. With a flick of her fingers, one of the books on the bookshelves in the room comes flying toward her, floating in the air, open at eye level.

She grumbles softly as she reads, probably checking the spells correctly, and then the book closes and returns to the bookshelf.

"In a fight, a wizard's mind can be their greatest enemy, Miss Stark." She begins, rolling up her sleeves, and you hold your breath in anticipation. "That's why you need to protect yours as best you can."

"Professor Erik taught me a few things." You mutter, but Agatha raises her eyebrow in disbelief, and you are almost offended. "Hey, I'm not that helpless."

"Is that what you think?" She challenges. "Look closer."

You frown in confusion, and try to understand what she means.

Then you notice the other figure in the corner of the room and almost jump out of your chair.

An illusion, Agatha never sat next to you, and she disappears the same second you noticed her.

"What the fuck....?"

"Illusions, Miss Stark, will be the least of your problems if the dark lord has access to your mind." Agatha warns as she moves from the shadows of the room, her hands folded on her belly, looking at you, who was still in shock from the last trick. "But I will teach you to recognize and escape false images first."

The first lesson is not easy.

Honestly, it is so exhausting that by the time Agatha frees you, you are stumbling sleepily to your room.

You fall into bed still in your study clothes, and are almost closing your eyes when Wanda walks in.

"Hey, sweetheart, aren't you going to dinner?" She asks, but you don't even open your eyes, muttering that you were going to sleep.

Wanda walks over to you, gives you a kiss on the cheek, and turns out the lights.

//-//-//

It takes another three weeks for something to happen.

Technically, a lot has actually happened.

You have learned to break illusions, create them, protect your mind from mid-level invaders, lie in a way that rings true in your mind and fools any invader.

Agatha won't admit it, but you are a very talented Occlumens.

And Wanda, is quite the opposite of that.

Charles often comments that maybe it's the power of scarlet magic, but he''s never seen someone who could manipulate the mind of others so easily. Not since Agatha, and the witch makes a sarcastic remark, but has a proud smile as she goes out to harvest carrots.

Where you are expert at protecting the mind, Wanda is at attacking it.

She doesn't have the same strength as you in blocking Agatha, but you can't invade anyone's mind without putting in a lot of effort.

"I think it's an interesting thing, actually. " Charles comments next to you, in the fourth week of studying mind magic, with the four of you sitting in the room, and Agatha in the armchair in front of you, while you have your wand raised and try to get into her thoughts. "You balance each other perfectly, you know? Y/N can protect your mind while you attack, Wanda. It's quite useful."

"Great observation, Charles." Agatha congratulates impressed, not seeming to have any difficulty blocking you even while talking to someone else.

"Does that mean I can get inside your head through her magic?" Wanda deduces in curiosity, but didn't expect anyone to confirm, her eyes glowing red and connecting with your mind.

You choke, firming your touch on your wand, and because you were already trying the spell, you manage to get into Agatha's mind without any problems with Wanda’s magic.

A small girl is running down a hallway; it's Hogwarts.

"Freak!" " Weirdo!" are the whispers of the crowds of children she is passing through.

And then the whispers change to "watch out, she's the principal' daughter" "I heard she killed that Ravenclaw boy"

A mirror. Agatha must be sixteen now, she looks young. She stares at her reflection, and then punches the glass.

"You are a disgrace to this family." A woman says in front of her as the memory fades to another, looking at her with contempt. "A scandal like this. Our coven will recommend your expulsion."

"I never wanted to be a part of this, Mama!" Agatha exclaims in a mixture of anger and hurt. "I hate those old backward women, I want to learn everything I can and -"

The slap is loud. "Rules exist to keep everyone safe, Agatha. You're too selfish to realize that."

It gets faster, the flashes. You watch Agatha grow up, study in hiding, kiss a girl behind the candy store who pushes her away when the older schoolmates laugh, you listen to the cruel comments, watch her buy the cottage, meet new people, and many colored lights, the spells she has already cast blending throughout the memories.

"Please, daughter, forgive me" She pleads in a crying voice, but Natalya looks at her with contempt. "I will do the right thing this time, please, I-"

"Swear it."

You see a flash of the day she took the perpetual vow, her hands entwined with her daughter, and then you see more quick flashes of lost moments, until you focus on the day she was alone in Magda's house again, her hand on the cheek of baby Wanda, now asleep.

"Forgive me, I have failed again."

The memory shifts, you watch Erik crying at a memorial service, many other people dressed in black beside him.

She talked to Erik about the girl, asking if he had noticed anything strange.

Visiting a mansion, your home. You see yourself, about five or six years old, playing in the backyard with your brother, the emaciated image of your father talking to her in a low tone, delivering a letter.

More unclear flashes.

Agatha writing the acceptance letters from the school that year, the name Wanda Maximoff emblazoned on the paper.

The day Wanda and Pietro enter Hogwarts, Agatha rummaging back into her old journals and books.

Agatha starts to resist then. You see two more flashes of class, before she pushes you and Wanda out of her thoughts, and you choke breathlessly, stumbling away.

The teacher gets up quickly, aggressively throwing herself at you two, and you cover Wanda with your body immediately, but she calms down, because Charles puts his arm around her waist.

"Agatha, breathe." He asks softly, and she seems to come to her senses, shaking her head, and casting an almost embarrassed look at you, before muttering apologies and leaving the room.

You and Wanda are wide-eyed, in shock at all you have seen for long seconds, as Charles sighs and moves to organize the books you had messed up when the lesson began.

"She's going to need some time." He says turning to give you a tender smile. "But don't worry, I can continue the lessons with you two. For now, I suggest a cup of tea to everyone, and we can continue tomorrow."

"S-sure, that sounds great." You mumble awkwardly, turning your face to Wanda, who looks troubled. "Everything okay?" You whisper to her, and she forces a smile, nodding.

You won't push it, so you even squeeze her hand gently before following Charles into the kitchen for tea.

//-//-//-//-//

Agatha doesn't leave her room for six whole days.

Charles just says that she is tired, and brings her meals.

You only study next to Wanda; it's not as if you can feel guilty about something she has done to you so many times.

And then, as if no time has passed, the former headmistress comes into the kitchen in travel clothes, while you are eating lunch.

"Good morning?" You exclaim in surprise, and the teacher only murmurs with a nod, picking up an apple from the fruit tray and turning toward the front door.

You exchange a confused look with Wanda before the two of you quickly stand up.

"Agatha, where are you...?"

"Hogwarts." She replies without stopping walking, as you follow her down the hallway to the exit. "Stephen has hidden the darkhold in the spiritual plane of the castle. I'll get it, and read it to Miss Maximoff as promised."

"I-" Wanda starts half uncertain, but Agatha gestures quickly.

"I'll be back as soon as I can." She clarifies. "We'll need him to perform the ritual as well. Please help Charles with the house, and if possible don't damage my vegetables."

And on the porch, she apparated.

You and Wanda stared at the empty space for a long moment.

"What just happened?" You mutter.

"Did our spell drive her insane?" She retorts back, and you sigh, turning to go back inside, and close the door, Wanda following you inside.

"I have no idea." You say. "Let's let Charles know she's gone, and try to keep him from blowing up other cauldrons while she's out."

//-//-//-//-////-//-//-//-//

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[bluejayblueskies]

Hello! I love your writing, the hand holding over the table was so much feelings <3 can I prompt 29. tickling the other one? No pressure :-)

touches prompt list

thank you for your patience with this anon! i offer you some scottish safehouse jonmartin fluff <3

.

It starts when Martin wraps his arms around Jon’s midsection while Jon is cooking, fingers brushing against the sensitive skin of Jon’s sides, and Jon flinches so hard he drops the wooden spoon in the pot of red sauce.

“Oh, shit. S-sorry,” Martin says. He pulls his hands back quickly, but they touch Jon’s sides again as he retracts them. Jon can’t help the high, reedy sound that escapes him, and he feels his cheeks grow warm.

“It’s—fine.” Jon fishes the spoon out of the pot, wrinkling his nose at it before depositing it unceremoniously in the sink. “Just, um.” He debates the pros and cons of being honest before mumbling, “I’m rather … ticklish.”

“Oh.” Martin’s forehead creases, like he can’t quite decide what he’s supposed to do with that information. “On your sides?”

“Y-yes. And, um.” Jon looks down at the ground, then at a random point over Martin’s shoulder. “A-and … everywhere?”

Martin raises an eyebrow. “Everywhere?” he echoes.

“Well.” Jon frowns. “N-not everywhere, I suppose. My nose is, er, relatively safe, a-and my fingers.” He taps his fingers on his thighs a few times. “I just … have really sensitive skin. A-and I don’t…”

He trails off. It feels too vulnerable, suddenly, to say that he’s really not touched often by gentle hands, so every feather-light brush of skin against his is like a shock to his system. “I don’t usually have to worry about it,” he says instead, which seems vague enough. He thinks Martin understands what he’s really saying, though, because a moment later, a hand is on his (touching, Jon notes, only the fingers) and a kiss is pressed gently to the tip of his nose.

“Well,” Martin says softly. “I can be more careful from now on if you’d like.”

Jon flushes. “Ah. It’s not…” He worries his bottom lip between his teeth, then settles for candor over subtlety. “It’s not a bad feeling.”

“Oh?”

Jon’s flush deepens, and he squeezes his eyes shut. “I … I like it when you touch me. A-and I don’t … want you to stop.”

Martin sounds amused—and slightly flustered—when he says, “I can touch you without tickling you, Jon.”

“I know,” Jon says, a bit petulantly. He takes a breath. “But I … I want you to.”

Martin lets out a small huff of laughter. “You want me to tickle you? Just … whenever?”

“If you don’t want to,” Jon says sullenly, “we don’t have to do it.”

“No, I—I do want to, I just…” Martin squeezes Jon’s hand once. “I want to make sure that I’m understanding you correctly.” Then, he brushes a finger gently along the inside of Jon’s wrist, and a small shudder runs through Jon’s body.

“Yes, that’s…” Jon trails off and simply nods. He hesitates, then reaches forward and takes Martin’s other hand in his so they’re clasped together, palm to palm. “I … I trust you, Martin. I—I know that you’d stop, if I asked, and … it’s nice. To be vulnerable like this.” Jon pinches his lips together for a moment. “Does—does that make any sense at all?”

“Yeah,” Martin says gently. “It does.” Then, quieter: “Thank you, Jon.”

Jon nods. The back of his throat is tight with unnamed emotions, and he swallows a few times in an attempt to clear them away. “A-and besides, I … I think this could be fun.”

Martin’s smile is gently teasing. “Fun? In this cottage? Surely not.”

“Ha ha.”

Martin’s smile widens, and he presses another quick kiss to Jon’s nose. “Okay, then. Let’s do it.” He rocks back and forth on his heels a few times, as if considering, before adding, “And you can try to tickle me back if you’d like.”

Jon raises an eyebrow. “Try to?”

Martin’s smile turns devious at the edges, and he doesn’t clarify. Instead, he squeezes Jon’s hands once more before releasing them. “This’ll be fun! I’m going to go start the laundry—let me know if you need any help with dinner?”

“Yes, of course.”

Jon watches Martin depart from the kitchen with a frown before returning to the pot and retrieving a new spoon from the drawer.

Try to? What did he mean by that?

Jon finds his answer a few days later when he casually brushes his fingers against Martin’s sides, just above his waist, and Martin doesn’t even twitch. A light touch to the soles of his feet elicits the same response, and a kiss on his neck results in only a smile and a kiss in return.

Martin is apparently, frustratingly, not ticklish.

This, naturally, escalates the game to outlandish proportions.

Jon will admit—albeit with some reluctance—that he is, in fact, a very competitive person. Board game nights and trivia always took on much higher stakes than strictly necessary, his research always had to be more thorough and comprehensive than that of his coworkers in the research department, and he felt a thrill of satisfaction every time he figured out the answer to a problem before anyone else. He just … doesn’t like to lose.

And Jon is currently losing against Martin. Quite badly, in fact. It only takes a few days of indignity and injustice for Jon to decide that enough is enough, and he is going to find Martin’s weakness and finally get ahead.

Every light kiss is accompanied by Jon’s fingers brushing against Martin’s stomach or sides. Every time Jon curls around Martin in bed, he’s sure to let his breath tickle the back of Martin’s neck and to trail his fingers up Martin’s spine. And every time Martin stubbornly refuses to react to Jon’s touch, Jon tries a new tactic, because something has to work. Martin can’t just be … immune. That would be cosmically unfair.

Because Martin takes every opportunity to tickle Jon in return. And the number of times that Jon has shrieked and dissolved into helpless giggles when Martin finds another spot on him that is, apparently, very ticklish is getting to be truly embarrassing.

Not that Jon is … complaining, necessarily. He likes the game—likes being touched by Martin in ways that continue to surprise him, without any expectation of something more. Martin stays clear of areas that make Jon uncomfortable, takes his hands away the moment Jon tells him to stop (usually in a fit of breathless giggles), and always entertains Jon’s attempts to tickle him in return, fruitless as they may be. He would just like it more if he weren’t losing quite so badly at it.

Not that he thinks Martin minds, judging by the fond smile that seems to be permanently etched onto his face lately. That same smile turns teasing, and a little bit smug, every time Jon fails to elicit the same breathless giggles out of Martin. Jon wishes the sight didn’t inspire such affection within him because he wants to be irritated by it.

His scowl never has any heat behind it.

A few days later, Jon finds himself ignoring the documentary they’ve put on the television in favor of skimming his fingers up and down Martin’s outer thigh. When Martin doesn’t move an inch, he grows bolder, then bolder still, until he finds himself on Martin’s lap, hands pressed firmly against his chest and lips trailing kisses down his jaw. He places a kiss on a spot that he knows is particularly ticklish on him, and when Martin still remains impassive, a noise of frustration escapes his throat.

Martin makes an amused sound. “Sorry,” he says in a distinctly unapologetic tone of voice. “I can see that you’re trying very hard.”

He sounds a bit breathless, Jon thinks with a hint of pride, even as he recognizes that that’s probably less a product of the tickling than it is of the fact that Jon is currently straddling him and kissing him quite thoroughly. Which is just ridiculous, in Jon’s opinion. Everyone is ticklish on their neck. It’s just human nature.

“I am,” Jon says primly, lips brushing against the underside of Martin’s jaw. Martin doesn’t so much as flinch. Bastard. “It’s rather rude that my efforts are going unappreciated.”

“Oh, I’m appreciating them. Very much. Feel free to continue, please.”

Jon pulls back and affixes Martin with the driest look he can muster. “I see you’re not sympathetic to my cause.”

Martin’s mouth falls into that same frustratingly smug smile. “I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.” His hands, resting on Jon’s waist, skim upward suddenly and send a violent shudder through Jon’s body.

“This,” Jon says breathlessly, “is unfair. Cruel and unusual punishment. Torture of the highest order.”

“So you’re giving up, then?” Martin says sweetly. He punctuates his words with a quick pinch just above Jon’s waist that has him squeaking.

Jon scowls and pinches Martin’s waist in return, to no avail. “Don’t be absurd.”

“You sure?”

“Yes.”

Martin shrugs. “All right.” Then, he lifts Jon from his lap like he’s made of papier-mâché, settles him back down on the couch next to him, and proceeds to attack his sides and stomach and arms until Jon is wriggling and tears are budding at the corners of his eyes and his stomach is sore from laughing.

It's wonderful.

(And maybe Jon’s just a little bit afraid that, if he finally finds a way to make Martin jump beneath his fingers, the game will end and Martin will cease trying to find new and wonderful ways to touch him gently, to handle him like he’s something tender, to take him apart and hold him close in the same breath.

Not afraid enough to stop trying to find Martin’s weak spot. But the thought is there all the same.)

In the end, none of Jon’s agonizing and strategizing and consideration of variables makes much of a difference. Because when he finally manages to tickle Martin, it happens quite by accident.

They’ve been in the safehouse for nearly a month now, and the tickling has become part of the daily routine. Jon thinks, therefore, that he should have come to expect it by now, but Martin never quite does the same thing day-to-day. Sometimes, his hands on Jon’s waist in the morning as Jon cooks breakfast are firm and comforting, eliciting nothing from Jon but a pleased little hum and a soft good morning. Other times, his fingers drum a light staccato rhythm against the small rolls of fat that have begun to accumulate on Jon’s hips, and Jon wriggles, making Martin laugh and insist that I’m hardly even doing anything, Jon.

Jon had never really considered touch as something that could contain so much love and affection within it. He’s never been more glad to be proven wrong.

The morning it happens is quiet and cloudy. The sunlight through the window is tinged with gray, bringing with it a cold that cuts through the downy duvet they have. Jon rolls over in bed with a groan. He presses himself firmly against Martin’s back, draping one arm across Martin’s chest and shifting so his legs are flush with Martin’s in an effort to combine their body heat and stave off the chill. His foot, socked and a good deal colder than the rest of his body, brushes against the back of Martin’s knee.

Martin twitches, his leg jerking away from Jon’s involuntarily. With sleep still clinging tightly to him, it takes Jon a moment to realize what’s happened and a few moments more to identify what, exactly, he had done to warrant the reaction.

Experimentally, he shifts and touches his foot to the back of Martin’s knee again, feather-light and fleeting. And when Martin makes a small sound in the back of his throat, froggy with sleep, and twitches away again, Jon grins. He buries his face in the back of Martin’s neck to hide it. Then—because he’s a bit giddy and just can’t help himself—he rests his foot against the back of Martin’s knee and wiggles his toes.

Martin’s leg curls up against his chest, effectively locking away his figurative Achille’s heel, and he mumbles something incoherent in his sleep that sounds equal parts groggy and irritated.

Jon’s smile turns soft, and he presses a kiss to Martin’s shoulder before wrapping his arms securely around him. The warmth radiating from Martin is enough to lull him back to sleep—but not before he tucks this new, incredibly valuable piece of information away in the back of his mind for safekeeping.

Jon has, in his memory, never been described as a particularly patient person. He always skips the boring parts of books and movies, preferring something that can actually capture his attention and hold it firm. He used to send daily emails to colleagues until they sent him the research or information or supplies he needed. He never lets soups simmer as long as the recipes tell him to, and he firmly believes that it’s all right to set the oven temperature higher than recommended in order to cut down the cooking or baking time required.

Therefore, he thinks it’s rather impressive that he manages to avoid showing his hand until a full day later, when he walks into the kitchen in the morning to see Martin standing by the counter, his back to him as he fiddles with the teabags and mugs. The weather is still brisk, but there’s a fire going in the fireplace that makes the temperature in the safehouse tolerable. As such, Martin is clad in a (rather adorable) mixture of bright purple fuzzy socks, a thick woolen jumper, and boxer shorts with little dachshunds on them.

And, well. His knees are right there.

It has a certain kind of symmetry to it—Jon wrapping his arms around Martin’s waist, earning himself a hum and a gentle good morning, and nuzzling into the space between Martin’s shoulder blades. He stays there for a moment, relaxing into the warmth and softness of the jumper, before slowly and deliberately lifting his foot and brushing it against the back of Martin’s left knee. Except, instead of dropping a wooden spoon into a pot of red sauce, Martin startles so badly that the mug slips from his hand, shattering rather spectacularly on the floor beside them.

Jon freezes, staring down at the puddle of half-steeped tea as it slowly creeps toward his feet. “… Ah.”

Martin mutters a curse under his breath and extracts himself from Jon’s now-loose embrace, bending down to begin picking up the largest of the shards. Jon stands there for a moment, feeling a strange mix of sheepishness and pride bloom in his chest, before going to retrieve the broom.

The mess is gone in a matter of minutes. Martin throws the last shard into the bin, dusts his hands off to ensure that they’re free of ceramic, then turns to face Jon with a sigh that straddles the border between exasperated and affectionate. “While I was holding tea?” he says, clearly trying to fight back a smile.

“I didn’t know you’d drop it!” Jon says defensively, gesturing widely with the broom he’s still holding.

“Well—I didn’t mean to. You just … caught me off guard.”

Jon can’t help the smile that spreads across his face at that. “Did I? How terribly rude of me.”

“Yes, yes, congratulations. You’ve found my weakness.” Martin’s smile is dripping with fondness. “I’m still winning, you know.”

“For now.” Jon adjusts his grip on the broom, the plastic bristles at the perfect height for his purposes.

“There’s not a chance that—hey!”

Martin backs up against the counter as Jon lunges forward with the broom, trying to angle it so it reaches behind Martin’s legs. It’s deceptively difficult. Martin gives Jon a comically exaggerated look of betrayal. “I expose my weaknesses to you, and this is what I get. Treachery and deceit.”

“I’m sure I don’t know what you mean.”

Jon adjusts his grip on the broom, but before he can make another move, Martin leans forward and presses a quick, lingering kiss to his lips. Jon makes a noise of surprise, then one of contentment. He finds his eyes fluttering shut despite himself, the tension bleeding out of his shoulders, and he thinks he’d rather like to keep kissing Martin for the rest of the morning, and perhaps the early afternoon as well.

Which is why it’s rather unfair that when Martin pulls away, Jon opens his eyes to find that Martin’s sidestepped him and Jon has lost all tactical advantage.

“That’s cheating!” Jon says indignantly.

“That’s taking advantage of all the resources at my disposal,” Martin counters. It’s infuriating, and Jon loves him so very, very much.

What commences after that is a rather short, altogether too lively game of cat and mouse that mostly involves Jon running after Martin with a broom and Martin somehow managing to stay frustratingly out of reach. Martin’s laughter is lighter and more joyful than Jon thinks he’s ever heard it before, and Jon feels a childlike happiness blossoming in his chest as he nearly trips over the corner of a rug and just manages to catch himself on the back of the couch. Therefore, he can’t bring himself to feel too disappointed when Martin somehow manages to extract the broom from his hands and corner him on the couch. His fingers find the sensitive spots on Jon’s body as Jon giggles breathlessly and swats half-heartedly at Martin’s hands.

“All right, all right,” he manages to say between laughs. “You’ve made your point. I give up.”

Martin stills his hands, letting them rest gently on Jon’s shoulders with his thumbs brushing against Jon’s collarbones. He’s hovering over Jon, knees bracketing Jon’s thighs as the arm of the couch digs into the middle of Jon’s back. It’s a position that makes Jon feel small and enclosed, but also warm and happy and safe, because … it’s Martin. Martin, who only touches Jon as much as he wants him to and stops the moment it becomes too much. Martin, who apologized profusely the first time he accidentally rolled on top of Jon at night but who, upon Jon’s insistence that it was actually quite nice, has now taken to acting like Jon’s own very warm and very lovely weighted blanket. Martin, who looks at a body that has seen so many unkind hands and unspeakable horrors and presses kisses to the scars that lie upon it and reminds Jon with every touch what it is like to feel comfortable in his own skin.

“I love you,” Jon whispers, because he feels it so acutely in this moment that he thinks he might burst.

“I love you too,” Martin murmurs, rubbing his thumbs in careful circles on Jon’s collarbones so as to soothe rather than to tickle. The care behind that touch—the difference in intent from just a few moments prior—probably shouldn’t make Jon’s chest tighten and his stomach grow hollow and fluttering, but it does.

Martin presses a kiss to Jon’s forehead, soft and lingering and gentle, before pulling back and saying, “Tea?”

Jon can’t help leaning in to give Martin a chaste kiss on the nose, then another one quickly on the lips. The small noise that Martin makes with each touch is something that Jon boxes away and treasures forever. “Yes,” he says with a quiet smile. “That would be lovely.”